5 - A Robot and an Assassin Under One Roof
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:06] ROBOKO
Good morning.
[00:13] ROBOKO
Time to wake up, Konoha-san.
[00:19] KONOHA
Morning, Satoko-chan.
[00:22] ROBOKO
Good morning.
[00:31] KONOHA
Why are your hands cold?
[00:33] SATOKO
That's not the problem here!
[00:36] SIGN
Leaf 5
A Robot and an Assassin
Under One Roof
[00:39] SIGN
A Few Hours Earlier
[00:46] SIGN
Trash Collection Zone
[00:48] SATOKO
Is this trash someone left behind?
[00:54] SATOKO
Wh-What is this?!
[01:00] SATOKO
Konoha-san!
[01:05] SIGN
Present
[01:09] MARIN
Behold!
[01:10] MARIN
As expected...
[01:11] MARIN
My robot is perfect!
[01:13] SATOKO
What was that robot?!
[01:16] MARIN
Oh, very well.
[01:22] MARIN
I shall explain!
[01:28] MARIN
Roboko is a robot equipped
with AI, modeled after you.
[01:32] SATOKO
Oh...
[01:33] MARIN
It's designed to do chores like you.
[01:37] SATOKO
Ooh.
[01:39] MARIN
Although, lately it's been learning a lot of new
features I don't even know about on its own.
[01:44] SATOKO
Huh?
[01:46] SATOKO
Wait, Konoha-san?!
[01:47] SATOKO
She's eating as if nothing's wrong!
[01:49] MARIN
Looks like she's unable to come to your aid.
[01:52] SATOKO
What? Why doesn't she notice?
[01:55] SATOKO
Th-Th-This is weird!
[02:06] ROBOKO
What is the matter?
[02:07] KONOHA
I feel like...
[02:09] KONOHA
the miso soup isn't as good as usual.
[02:14] ROBOKO
I feel it is rude to complain about
food that someone made for you.
[02:18] KONOHA
I guess you're right.
[02:19] SATOKO
She let the robot argue back!
[02:21] SATOKO
So that's how I should respond...
[02:24] MARIN
And now Glasses Assassin
is no longer a problem!
[02:27] MARIN
Now, you will work for me, ninja girl!
[02:32] SATOKO
Speaking of, what are you planning to
do by kidnapping me and not killing me?
[02:39] MARIN
I'm the same way Glasses used to be.
[02:51] SIGN
SHRIEK
[02:52] MARIN
I leave too much evidence.
[02:53] SIGN
236 Glasses
[02:53] SIGN
237 Skull-chan
[02:54] MARIN
And that's why I was low in the rankings.
[02:55] SIGN
New Review
[02:55] SIGN
Thank you for your quick work.
However, I think you leave behind too much evidence.
You do the job well, but I think you need a little more
than that...
I'll be leaving a 1-star review this time.
Please do your best next time.
[02:55] SIGN
Anon (male)
[03:01] SIGN
236 Glasses
[03:01] SIGN
New Review
[03:02] SIGN
Your work is sloppy and you leave too much evidence.
[03:04] (Flashback) MARIN
We're the same.
[03:11] MARIN
So I secretly considered her my rival,
[03:13] SIGN
Assassin Ranking
[03:13] MARIN
but she's been shooting up
in the rankings lately.
[03:15] SIGN
Rank up
[03:15] SIGN
98 Glasses
[03:17] MARIN
Her reviews said that she left no traces.
[03:24] MARIN
It made me curious,
so I decided to look into her.
[03:32] MARIN
That's when I found out that she was
teaming up and working with you.
[03:47] SATOKO
You have a skill that allows you
to leave no evidence, correct?
[03:51] SATOKO
I suppose.
[03:52] SATOKO
I can turn things into leaves.
[03:55] MARIN
What?! That's amazing!
[03:56] MARIN
You use magic?!
[03:58] SATOKO
It's ninjutsu.
[03:59] MARIN
A-Awesome!
[04:01] SIGN
Thinking
[04:01] SATOKO
That's right. Robots can't use ninja skills.
[04:04] SATOKO
Surely Konoha-san will pick up on that
[04:06] SATOKO
when they do a job together,
and then she'll realize it's a fake!
[04:10] KONOHA
You're a fake.
[04:13] SATOKO
I'm counting on you, Konoha-san!
[04:15] MARIN
Hey, can you turn this chair back?
[04:17] SATOKO
Please hurry and realize
that the robot isn't me.
[04:23] MARIN
Well? Can you?
[04:24] KONOHA
We've got work after this.
[04:27] KONOHA
What do you want to do for dinner?
[04:28] KONOHA
Make it here? Eat out afterward?
[04:32] ROBOKO
I am
[04:33] ROBOKO
fine anywhere as long as there is an outlet.
[04:37] KONOHA
You're a child of the times...
[04:38] MARIN
Oh, looks like they're heading to work.
[04:40] MARIN
We should go to work, too.
[04:43] MARIN
Show me what you've got, kunoichi.
[04:46] MARIN
What are you worried about?
[04:48] MARIN
It's no different from your previous job.
[04:51] MARIN
There's no reason to stick with her.
[04:54] MARIN
Look at Glasses.
[04:55] MARIN
She doesn't even realize that's not you.
[04:57] SATOKO
No!
[04:58] SATOKO
Konoha-san will figure it out!
[05:00] SATOKO
I'm going to make sure with my own eyes!
[05:04] MARIN
Hey! Wait!
[05:07] KONOHA
All right.
[05:08] KONOHA
Done.
[05:09] ROBOKO
Job complete.
[05:11] SATOKO
Oh, there they—
[05:14] KONOHA
Satoko-chan. The usual, please.
[05:17] ROBOKO
What?
[05:17] KONOHA
Don't "what?" me. The usual.
[05:19] KONOHA
Where you turn the bodies into
leaves to erase the evidence.
[05:22] ROBOKO
Oh, yes. Erase.
[05:39] SATOKO
What was that feature?!
[05:41] MARIN
No clue. I made it all on vibes.
[05:44] MARIN
But wow, as expected of me.
[05:47] SATOKO
That's something no human can do.
[05:49] SATOKO
That's it!
[05:50] SATOKO
Maybe she'll realize it now!
[05:52] SATOKO
Konoha-san!
[05:53] KONOHA
Satoko-chan...
[05:55] KONOHA
You've powered up.
[05:56] SATOKO
Why won't you realize?!
[05:57] SIGN
SCREAM!!
[05:57] SATOKO
Why?!
[05:58] SATOKO
Are you doing a comedy skit?!
[06:00] MARIN
Whoa! Hey!
[06:00] SATOKO
It doesn't make sense!
[06:02] SATOKO
Laser beams came from its eyes!
[06:04] SATOKO
I'm not this metallic!
[06:07] SATOKO
Could it be... you were playing
dumb so you could lure her out?
[06:11] SATOKO
That's right!
[06:12] SATOKO
She's the assassin who kidnapped me!
[06:15] KONOHA
There are two Satoko-chans?!
[06:17] SATOKO
Konoha-san?!
[06:17] MARIN
Well, can't be helped now
that I've been caught.
[06:21] MARIN
My name is Izutsumi Marin!
[06:23] MARIN
I'm your rival!
[06:25] SATOKO
Take another good look, Konoha-san.
[06:31] SATOKO
Marin-san...
[06:33] SATOKO
I can't accept Konoha-san being
genuinely fooled by this.
[06:37] SATOKO
She's not supposed to be this stupid.
[06:40] SATOKO
Is something coming from
the robot that hypnotizes her
[06:43] SATOKO
into thinking it looks like me?
[06:45] MARIN
Nope, nothing.
[06:46] SATOKO
Nothing?!
[06:47] MARIN
It's the spitting image.
[06:48] SATOKO
The spitting image?!
[06:49] SATOKO
Spitting... image?
[06:53] ROBOKO
Tee-hee.
[06:57] SATOKO
Listen here!
[06:58] SATOKO
Look at this!
[07:00] SATOKO
A robot can't do this!
[07:01] SATOKO
Leaf-turning ninja technique!
[07:03] SIGN
Charging
[07:03] SATOKO
I turned this AC into leaves in an instant!
[07:07] KONOHA
Isn't that one better?
[07:09] MARIN
Cool. Maybe I'll come back and
retrieve it to use it for myself.
[07:14] SATOKO
O-Oh, right! This morning's miso soup!
[07:18] SATOKO
You said it wasn't good!
[07:19] SATOKO
I can make better meals
than this robot, Konoha-san!
[07:23] KONOHA
I'm sorry, Satoko-chan.
I see things clearly now.
[07:26] SATOKO
Konoha-san!
[07:27] KONOHA
Now, let's defeat these two together.
[07:30] SIGN
BANG!
[07:31] MARIN
We'll remember this!
[07:38] KONOHA
Let's eat.
[07:46] ROBOKO
How is it?
[07:47] ROBOKO
Did the miso soup turn out delicious?
[07:49] KONOHA
Hmm...
[07:51] KONOHA
The flavor is a little weak.
[07:53] ROBOKO
Sad...
[07:54] KONOHA
But this is my first time trying
miso soup with eggplant.
[07:59] KONOHA
It's good.
[08:03] MARIN
Darn.
[08:04] MARIN
Just you wait, Glasses Assassin!
[08:07] SATOKO
Do you not need me because Roboko
can emit lasers from its eyes?!
[08:13] MARIN
Ninkoro.
[08:15] ROBOKO
Ninkoro.
[08:36] ROBOKO
Smile.
[08:42] SATOKO
Hello.
[08:43] SATOKO
I'm Kusagakure Satoko.
[08:45] SATOKO
After unintentionally
leaving the ninja village,
[08:47] SATOKO
I was taken in by Konoha-san,
and we've been living together.
[08:51] SATOKO
However, somehow I've been living
with an assassin girl named Marin
[08:56] SATOKO
for a whole month now.
[08:59] MARIN
Hey, kunoichi. Breakfast is ready.
[09:03] SATOKO
Coming.
[09:08] SATOKO
It's very delicious.
[09:10] SATOKO
What is this dish called?
[09:12] SIGN
You can't get enough of the melty cheese!
[09:13] MARIN
It's called croque-monsieur.
[09:15] MARIN
It's nice to have a Western-style
breakfast like this sometimes, right?
[09:18] SATOKO
Yes!
[09:24] KONOHA
Satoko-chan.
[09:26] SIGN
Boiling
[09:26] ROBOKO
Yes. Warm tea, correct?
[09:31] KONOHA
Wow. How did you know?
[09:35] ROBOKO
Your body temperature was lowering.
[09:38] ROBOKO
And it has been some time
since you last hydrated.
[09:38] SIGN
Today's Activity Log
7:00 Wake up
7:01 Sleep again
8:23 Wake up
8:26 Wash face / brush teeth
8:38 Breakfast
8:56 Lie down
11:13 Toilet
12:02 Lunch
12:34 Lie down
[09:41] KONOHA
You're very attentive,
but it's kind of grossing me out.
[09:49] ROBOKO
Konoha-san.
[09:51] ROBOKO
Am I... useful?
[09:55] KONOHA
Where's this coming from?
[09:58] KONOHA
Yeah, you're useful.
[10:02] ROBOKO
Then I am glad.
[10:06] KONOHA
Though, lately, you give
the overwhelming impression
[10:09] KONOHA
of a large home appliance when you sit.
[10:13] KONOHA
You mainly cooked Japanese-style dishes,
but you've expanded your repertoire.
[10:17] KONOHA
Your miso soup especially tastes better.
[10:20] SATOKO
What?
[10:21] SATOKO
Am I losing to a robot?
[10:21] SIGN
Commentary
[10:25] SATOKO
Marin-san!
[10:27] MARIN
I told you to knock.
[10:30] SATOKO
Could you teach me how to make
that, um... croque-monsieur?
[10:35] MARIN
What's this about?
[10:41] SATOKO
I thought she might like it if I learned some
new recipes beyond Japanese-style foods.
[10:47] SATOKO
Konoha-san only smiles when it's time to eat.
[10:52] MARIN
That's right!
[10:54] MARIN
Normally, she's super stone-faced.
[10:56] MARIN
Like in this picture!
[10:58] MARIN
She's not smiling, but look how cool she looks!
[11:00] SATOKO
Marin-san, could it be that you...
[11:02] SIGN
Konoha
[11:02] SIGN
Marin
[11:02] SATOKO
like Konoha-san?
[11:05] MARIN
N-No way!
[11:06] MARIN
I'm only researching her as her rival!
[11:11] ROBOKO
Hm.
[11:12] ROBOKO
After my miso soup research,
[11:14] SIGN
Studying
[11:15] ROBOKO
I think I will hone my skills to be
of assistance in Konoha-san's job.
[11:20] ROBOKO
Ding.
[11:22] SIGN
Do not feed the cats!!
[11:24] SIGN
Beware of Vicious Cats
[11:24] MAO
I've finally located it, nyan.
[11:26] MAO
The runaway ninja's lair.
[11:27] MAO
I'll report this to everyone in
the village and plan an ambush,
[11:30] MAO
and then it'll all be over, meow.
[11:36] MAO
Who are you, meow?!
[11:38] MAO
W-Wait a minute, meow!
[11:40] MAO
This is a secret scroll passed
down among the Kusagakure.
[11:43] MAO
If you remove this seal...
[11:43] SIGN
Time until transformation
is complete:
[11:45] MAO
Just for you, I'll tell you what happens.
[11:47] MAO
So shut up and listen, meow!
[11:49] ROBOKO
I have determined you are stalling for time.
[11:49] SIGN
Kill
[11:55] SIGN
GNYAAAAA
[11:59] KONOHA
I'm home.
[12:01] KONOHA
Wait, where'd all that blood come from?!
[12:03] ROBOKO
I cut my finger while cooking.
[12:06] KONOHA
Wha...
[12:08] KONOHA
Are you okay?
[12:10] KONOHA
I don't see any injuries anywhere.
[12:13] ROBOKO
The wound must have healed already.
[12:16] KONOHA
Really?
[12:17] SIGN
Thank you
[12:17] ROBOKO
Thank you for your concern.
[12:18] SIGN
for your concern.
[12:19] KONOHA
We have a job in the mountains tomorrow,
so I'm going to bed early.
[12:22] ROBOKO
Right.
[12:30] KONOHA
I'm exhausted.
[12:32] ROBOKO
Good work today.
[12:35] KONOHA
I would've gotten lost in the mountains
if you hadn't flown us out there.
[12:41] ROBOKO
I was able to give it my all by
thinking about you, Konoha-san.
[12:59] KONOHA
Whoa. You okay?
[13:01] ROBOKO
Apologies. It seems I am tired from flying.
[13:08] KONOHA
Flying ninja skills are draining.
[13:10] KONOHA
Thanks for your hard work, Satoko-chan.
[13:15] ROBOKO
Could you plug me into... an outlet?
[13:18] KONOHA
Of course.
[13:23] KONOHA
You're sleeping there tonight?
[13:26] KONOHA
Okay, I'm turning off the lights.
[13:29] KONOHA
Goodnight, Satoko-chan.
[13:32] ROBOKO
Goodnight.
[13:37] KONOHA
Brr.
[13:38] KONOHA
That's right... We've...
[13:41] ROBOKO
We've been sleeping together lately,
[13:43] ROBOKO
so it's a bit lonely.
[13:46] KONOHA
Satoko-chan.
[13:56] ROBOKO
K-K-Konoha-san.
[13:58] KONOHA
What's with that look?
[14:01] KONOHA
I was a little cold, too.
[14:05] KONOHA
Here, lie down.
[14:15] KONOHA
Jeez, Satoko-chan.
[14:19] KONOHA
Satoko-chan...
[14:20] KONOHA
You're warm, like a charging phone.
[14:27] KONOHA
The miso soups you make are still the best.
[14:31] ROBOKO
You have said before that it was delicious,
so I prepared a full pot this time.
[14:37] KONOHA
That's too much.
[14:39] ROBOKO
Apologies.
[14:42] SATOKO
Marin-san!
[14:43] SATOKO
It's done!
[14:45] SIGN
Satoko-Style
Shinobi's Croque-Monsieur
[14:48] MARIN
This is good, kunoichi!
[14:50] MARIN
Great job for your first try!
[14:52] SATOKO
It's all thanks to your teaching, Marin-san.
[14:55] SATOKO
I'll make some for Konoha-san next.
[15:00] MARIN
All right, work complete!
[15:03] MARIN
Thanks to you, kunoichi,
I'm rising in the rankings.
[15:04] SIGN
162 Skull-chan
[15:06] MARIN
Thanks a bunch!
[15:08] MARIN
There, there, there.
[15:08] SATOKO
It makes me so happy to be praised.
[15:11] SIGN
162 Skull-chan
[15:12] MARIN
But because of Roboko,
Glasses isn't coming down any.
[15:13] SIGN
161 Glasses
[15:17] MARIN
As expected of my rival.
[15:19] SATOKO
I see.
[15:21] SATOKO
Konoha-san is just fine without me.
[15:29] MARIN
You know, you can go home if you want.
[15:31] SATOKO
Huh?
[15:32] MARIN
I'm starting to feel sorry for you.
[15:35] MARIN
No matter how perfect my robot
is at tricking Glasses...
[15:40] MARIN
Feeling like you're not needed
just sucks, doesn't it?
[15:46] SATOKO
Marin-san...
[15:49] MARIN
I had a sister before.
[15:52] MARIN
Unlike me, she could do anything—
[15:53] SATOKO
Thank you very much!
[15:55] SATOKO
I'm going home, then!
[15:56] MARIN
Huh? Hey!
[15:58] MARIN
I was still talking!
[15:59] SATOKO
So long!
[16:00] MARIN
Get back here!
[16:04] SIGN
Keep out
[16:04] KONOHA
All done.
[16:06] KONOHA
I'm getting hungry.
Let's head back after we eat.
[16:09] KONOHA
Do you prefer a place with an outlet again?
[16:11] ROBOKO
Yes, thank you.
[16:14] STAFF
Welcome in.
[16:17] KONOHA
Table for two.
[16:23] KONOHA
The electric bill's been a lot higher lately,
[16:26] KONOHA
so be mindful when you use it
for things other than charging.
[16:30] ROBOKO
Have the household finances been tight?
[16:32] KONOHA
Well, that's not exactly what I meant.
[16:35] ROBOKO
The jobs you do pay you very well.
[16:39] ROBOKO
However, since the original...
[16:41] ROBOKO
I mean, since I turned
your furniture into leaves,
[16:45] ROBOKO
we have been frugal in
buying new appliances,
[16:48] ROBOKO
thus making our standard of living low.
[16:52] KONOHA
I'm surprised. You noticed all that?
[16:57] ROBOKO
Of course. Because it's about you.
[17:01] KONOHA
What? That's kind of scary.
[17:06] ROBOKO
If you don't mind, could you tell me
[17:08] ROBOKO
the reason you chose this line
of work, raise your ranking,
[17:12] ROBOKO
and have the need to earn a lot of money?
[17:22] KONOHA
I guess I can tell you.
[17:24] KONOHA
But not everything.
[17:26] ROBOKO
I do not mind.
[17:27] ROBOKO
Rather than helping you at your
job without the knowledge,
[17:30] ROBOKO
I believe it would be good for me
[17:32] ROBOKO
as your coworker to
understand your objectives.
[17:35] KONOHA
It's more beneficial for me if
you remain a clueless helper.
[17:40] ROBOKO
I have helped you this far.
[17:42] ROBOKO
Do you believe there is something that could
stop me from helping you if you explain?
[17:47] ROBOKO
You can tell me anything.
[17:51] KONOHA
I suppose you're right.
[17:52] KONOHA
We've been together for a while now.
[17:56] KONOHA
I don't think you'd leave me just due to
disliking something about me now.
[18:05] ROBOKO
I see.
[18:06] ROBOKO
So that is your reason.
[18:09] KONOHA
This is the first time I've
told anyone about this.
[18:13] ROBOKO
I knew the name "Koga Konoha" was an alias,
but to think that you had such a past...
[18:18] KONOHA
Now that I've told you my reasons,
will you still work with me?
[18:24] ROBOKO
Of course I will.
[18:25] ROBOKO
As I said, I will not reject you.
[18:32] KONOHA
Satoko-chan, your skin is cold.
[18:39] SATOKO
Hey!
[18:40] SATOKO
What is this heartwarming atmosphere?!
[18:43] SIGN
Hug...
[18:44] SATOKO
H-Hugging?!
[18:47] KONOHA
You're here,
[18:48] KONOHA
fake Satoko-chan.
[18:49] SATOKO
I'm not!
[18:51] SATOKO
I'm not fake!
[18:52] SATOKO
That one is the fake!
[18:54] SATOKO
Didn't it feel hard when you hugged it?
[18:56] SATOKO
You just said it felt cold, too!
[18:58] SATOKO
That is robot! Cold!
[18:59] SATOKO
I am human! Warm!
[19:02] KONOHA
You make me sick.
[19:04] KONOHA
I held back last time because you
look so similar to Satoko-chan.
[19:07] MARIN
This doesn't look good, kunoichi!
[19:09] SATOKO
Marin-san!
[19:10] MARIN
Her murderous intent is no joke!
[19:12] SATOKO
Whoa, scary!
[19:12] KONOHA
That girl over there didn't bother me
since she was lower in the rankings,
[19:17] KONOHA
but lately, her rank's been skyrocketing.
[19:19] MARIN
Gulp.
[19:20] KONOHA
Satoko-chan, please.
[19:21] ROBOKO
Yes.
[19:22] SATOKO
"Yes"?
[19:30] ROBOKO
I released a special powder.
[19:32] ROBOKO
Now no one around us can see us.
[19:35] KONOHA
Thank you, Satoko-chan.
[19:37] SATOKO; MARIN
What?! That's too convenient!
[19:39] MARIN
Roboko, I'm the one who created you!
[19:42] ROBOKO
Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot...
[19:43] ROBOKO
Turn.
[19:44] MARIN
Hey! It's pretending it can't hear me!
[19:46] SATOKO
Wait, where's Konoha-san?
[19:48] MARIN
This isn't good, kunoichi!
[19:49] MARIN
Even if it's two people versus
one person and one robot,
[19:51] MARIN
I can't do anything with my bare hands!
[19:53] MARIN
Do you have a plan?
[19:55] SATOKO
No way! I know more than anyone
how strong Konoha-san is—
[19:58] SATOKO
One robot...
[19:58] SIGN
2 people VS 1 person + 1 robot
[20:00] SATOKO
That's it!
[20:01] MARIN
What is it, kunoichi?
[20:03] SATOKO
Konoha-san!
[20:05] SATOKO
Look!
[20:17] SATOKO
My ninjutsu turns things into leaves.
[20:21] SATOKO
Robots are things, not people!
[20:24] SATOKO
Now do you understand
that I'm the real one?!
[20:45] SATOKO
Konoha-san?
[20:51] KONOHA
Oh... Right.
[20:54] KONOHA
You're the real Satoko-chan.
[20:57] SATOKO
Konoha-san!
[20:59] KONOHA
I don't need that right now.
[21:01] SATOKO
Well, let's go home!
[21:04] KONOHA
Ah...
[21:07] KONOHA
Yeah.
[21:09] SATOKO
Marin-san, thank you for taking care of me!
[21:14] MARIN
Roboko...
[21:19] SATOKO
We're home.
[21:21] KONOHA
The miso soup...
[21:23] SATOKO
Roboko made that, right?
[21:25] SATOKO
Should I toss it and make a new batch?
[21:29] KONOHA
No, I'll eat it.
[21:31] KONOHA
I will.
[21:52] SATOKO
Oh. It's pretty good.
[23:26] SIGN
To Be Continued
[23:29] SIGN
Next
[23:29] SIGN
Episode
[23:30] SATOKO
Konoha-san, it's the next
episode's preview.
[23:33] KONOHA
Say it like Roboko would.
[23:34] SATOKO
Huh? Um, um...
[23:35] SATOKO
Konoha-san. It is the preview
for the next episode.
[23:37] KONOHA
Keep that up for a while.
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