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E3 - Best Friend of the Dead

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] ---
    #2. KAITO
    #3. HARUKI
[00:03] ---
    Why?
[00:03] ---
    #1. SHOU
[00:07] ---
    Why is this happening?
[00:09] ---
    CLUB SHOU-TIME
[00:10] ---
    Dad...
[00:12] ---
    Mom...
[00:18] ---
    Are you all right?
[00:21] ---
    You've really hung in there...
[00:23] ---
    There's nothing to be afraid of here.
[00:26] ---
    Anyway, get some rest for now.
[00:31] ---
    Manager...
[00:34] ---
    They've come again.
[00:38] ---
    I'm sorry!
[00:39] ---
    There's a small meeting I need to attend.
[00:42] ---
    Let's take the time to talk again later.
[00:45] ---
    You can wait by yourself, can't you?
[00:54] ---
    It'll be all right.
[00:58] ---
    I'll definitely come back.
[00:59] ---
    It's a promise.
[01:03] ---
    Okay.
[01:18] ---
    Let's do this.
[01:19] ---
    Yeah!
[01:24] ---
    Hang in there.
[01:26] ---
    CLUB SHOU-TIME
    THIRD GENERATION
[01:29] ---
    Hurry, give me another one!
[01:31] ---
    Okay!
[01:32] ---
    Don't do it, Akemi! Sto—
[01:37] ---
    Damn it.
[01:40] ---
    I wanted to become number one...
    just like Shou...
[01:45] ---
    Let's do whatever it takes
    to protect this place!
[01:47] ---
    Put some spirit into it!
[01:48] ---
    CLUB SHOU-TIME
[01:49] ---
    Yeah!
[02:13] ---
    Phew...
[02:14] ---
    It's been a while
    since I was last here, but...

[02:16] ---
    Shinjuku is just as I expected it to be.
[02:19] ---
    It's really packed here.
[02:22] ---
    But, I know you wouldn't
    just lay down and die!
[02:27] ---
    Wait for me, Kencho!
[02:35] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[02:38] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[02:41] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[02:44] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[02:49] ---
    From the outset,
    it’s a ban-banging upset!

[02:51] ---
    Metamorphose into a classic life
[02:54] ---
    Once upon a time
    Long, long ago

[02:56] ---
    Humankind merely
    ate, slept, danced, and laughed

[02:59] ---
    Endless suffering and social pressures
    pushing people to their limits

[03:02] ---
    Are portrayed as part of the norm
    on the morning news

[03:04] ---
    Wake up again to a coerced routine
[03:06] ---
    Hamburgers for breakfast, break up
    the status quo with the paranormal

[03:09] ---
    Am I a fool for longing
    for these things?

[03:11] ---
    Song of the Dead!!
[03:13] ---
    I wanna!!
    Dancing, dancing

[03:15] ---
    Rolling, rolling
    Only one, my life

[03:19] ---
    Sooner or later,
    life will come to an end

[03:22] ---
    Want more than a sense of futility,
    don’t you?

[03:25] ---
    Dancing, dancing
    Morning, morning

[03:28] ---
    Go back to the basics
    and start something new

[03:33] ---
    Do what you wanna do
[03:36] ---
    Every night, every time
[03:39] ---
    Let’s live
    until we’ve had our fill of fun

[03:48] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[03:51] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[03:53] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[03:56] ---
    Dystopia to the Song of the Dead!!
[04:12] ---
    Now that I've quit,
    I can grow any kind of beard I want.
[04:16] ---
    I wonder if there's any way
    I can get it to grow in any cooler...
[04:25] ---
    AS ATTRACTIVE AS WALKING...
    ACCESSORIES FOR...
[04:33] ---
    Nope, no way.
[04:37] ---
    9. WINE AND DINE A FLIGHT ATTENDANT
    10. GROW A COOL BEARD
[04:37] ---
    I'm shaving it.
[04:43] ---
    What should I do today?
[04:52] ---
    Oh?
[04:56] ---
    It's working!
[04:59] ---
    I've got messages!
[05:02] ---
    The internet must be back up!
[05:07] ---
    Come to think of it,
    for the past three years,

[05:09] ---
    I was so bogged down with work that
    I've had to turn down invite after invite.

[05:15] ---
    BEEN FOREVER! YOU GOOD?
[05:16] ---
    There are tons of people that
    I'd like to see after all this time!

[05:18] ---
    I QUIT MY JOB! NEED A SURFING BUDDY RYUJI?
[05:46] ---
    Oh right.
[05:49] ---
    I can only use my phone now
    because internet traffic is down.

[05:56] ---
    Which means
    there aren't as many people using it.

[06:03] ---
    I sacrificed time I could have spent
    with friends, for what?
[06:06] ---
    What good did all that overtime do me?
[06:12] ---
    HIROJI YUUTO NAOKI KENCHO
[06:14] ---
    You should just quit already!
[06:21] ---
    KENCHO
[06:21] ---
    Kencho...
[06:25] ---
    There's no way a guy like you
    would just lay down and die.
[07:04] ---
    I knew it. It's no good.
[07:06] ---
    There's no way out!
[07:25] ---
    Nothing but water for three days.
[07:30] ---
    Worst of all...
[07:37] ---
    I've been stuck in here with this monster.
[07:41] ---
    I'm losing my goddamn mind!
[07:46] ---
    That said...
[07:48] ---
    I'm glad my drunk ass just happened
    to pick the bondage room.
[07:58] ---
    Damn it.
[07:59] ---
    I'm starving.
[08:01] ---
    And I'm so exhausted by all this.
[08:07] ---
    Is this how this all ends for me?
[08:13] ---
    In some stupid place like this?
[08:21] ---
    Hey, that's wild!
[08:27] ---
    -Why am I thinking of him now?
    -My sides hurt!
[08:33] ---
    Oh... that's right...
[08:36] ---
    You always laughed
    at my stupid jokes, didn't you?

[08:41] ---
    -Do it again! I want to film it!
    -Those were the days! In college…
[08:58] ---
    Is that you, Akira?
[08:59] ---
    Whoa! You picked up!
[09:01] ---
    Kencho, you're alive!
[09:03] ---
    It's been a while! Has it really been a year
    since we last went out for drinks?
[09:08] ---
    Y-Yeah...
[09:10] ---
    What's wrong?
[09:11] ---
    You don't sound down!
[09:13] ---
    Uh, well... why do you sound so hyped?
[09:18] ---
    I'll tell you all about it when we meet!
[09:21] ---
    Where are you right now?
[09:22] ---
    I'm in Shinjuku.
[09:24] ---
    Okay! Shinjuku! I'll be right over!
[09:27] ---
    No, it's impossible.
[09:29] ---
    The place is swarming with zombies.
    Just forget about me!
[09:32] ---
    It'll be fine! It'll be fine!
[09:35] ---
    Anyway, text me your address!
[09:36] ---
    -Huh? You—
    -Bye!
[09:44] ---
    Back in college, Kencho and I
[09:46] ---
    went through a lot together
    during our four years in the rugby club.

[09:50] ---
    He was a handsome, smooth talker.
[09:51] ---
    But despite being popular, he'd go
    all-out to be the life of the party.

[09:57] ---
    He was my closest friend.
[10:02] ---
    He became a big-time real
    estate agent after college.

[10:07] ---
    With his natural talent for communication,
    things were smooth sailing for him at his job.

[10:12] ---
    Yesterday, I was entertaining
    some Diet members!
[10:15] ---
    Those guys spend money
    on a whole other level!
[10:19] ---
    Oh, that's right.
[10:20] ---
    Check out my new girlfriend.
[10:23] ---
    She's a model!
[10:26] ---
    -Took a day trip to Paris last weekend.
[10:28] ---
    -Meanwhile...
[10:29] ---
    My soul was getting crushed in the gears
    of an exploitative corporation.

[10:34] ---
    So I didn't have the patience to listen
    to other people's success stories.

[10:43] ---
    What's the deal with your company?!
[10:45] ---
    It's super exploitative!
[10:46] ---
    Just walk away!
[10:48] ---
    You should just quit already!
[10:55] ---
    What the hell...
[10:58] ---
    I'm seriously struggling, here.
[11:01] ---
    My serious advice is that you should quit!
[11:04] ---
    Staying with a company
    like that is stupid.
[11:07] ---
    You're just an idiot!
[11:09] ---
    And you're being obnoxious with all
    your bragging about your personal life!
[11:13] ---
    You should stop doing that!
[11:19] ---
    -Bartender!
    -Bartender!
[11:20] ---
    -Check please!
    -Check please!
[11:27] ---
    Wait for me, Kencho!
[11:30] ---
    I'm on my way!
[11:48] ---
    So, this is the end, huh?
[11:54] ---
    Considering my life...
[11:56] ---
    It's a pretty great way to go out.
[12:01] ---
    I'm sorry...
[12:02] ---
    I couldn't keep my promise.
[12:22] ---
    What happened?
[12:25] ---
    Am I... safe?
[12:32] ---
    What's that noise?
[12:56] ---
    All right!
[13:01] ---
    Okay!
[13:10] ---
    What's happening?
[13:14] ---
    The zombies are gone?
[13:16] ---
    What's going on here?
[13:49] ---
    Kencho...
[13:55] ---
    Akira...
[14:00] ---
    You really came.
[14:03] ---
    Kencho!
[14:14] ---
    You were right this whole time!
[14:16] ---
    I should have just quit
    a company like that!
[14:20] ---
    But instead of listening to your advice...
[14:24] ---
    I got jealous of how
    successful and happy you were.
[14:29] ---
    I got annoyed
    and took my anger out on you!
[14:33] ---
    Even though we're friends...
    I'm sorry!
[14:37] ---
    I really am! I'm sorry!
[14:45] ---
    You... came all this way...
[14:49] ---
    just to tell me that?
[14:51] ---
    I'm really sorry!
[14:54] ---
    W-Well...
[14:57] ---
    How should I say this?
[15:00] ---
    I should...
[15:04] ---
    They're back!
[15:06] ---
    I shouldn't have shouted!
[15:07] ---
    Our only chance is to go up!
[15:14] ---
    Kencho! Behind you!
[15:18] ---
    It's no good! It's not gonna hold!
[15:20] ---
    Hang in there!
[15:29] ---
    That won't be enough.
[15:31] ---
    They'll get through soon!
[15:35] ---
    What should we do?
[15:37] ---
    What should we do?
[15:39] ---
    What should we do?
[15:40] ---
    What should we do?
[15:42] ---
    What should we do?
[15:44] ---
    Ugh, damn it!
[15:46] ---
    What should we do, Akira?!
[15:49] ---
    Hey, Akira!
[15:54] ---
    We jump.
[16:00] ---
    The next building over
    is close enough to leap across.
[16:03] ---
    What? No way...
[16:05] ---
    We can't make that distance!
[16:06] ---
    That's impossible!
[16:10] ---
    Hey... Akira?
[16:13] ---
    Guess we'll find out by jumping!
[16:19] ---
    Akira!
[16:33] ---
    A-Are you all right?!
[16:38] ---
    How'd you like that?!
[16:40] ---
    How'd I like it?!
[16:42] ---
    You've got balls of steel, man!
[16:44] ---
    Hurry up and get over here!
[17:00] ---
    Kencho?
[17:05] ---
    Akira...
[17:07] ---
    I know you came all this way
    to save me, but I'm sorry.
[17:14] ---
    I don't think... I can jump that.
[17:21] ---
    Before the end, there's something
    I want to tell you, Akira.
[17:25] ---
    The truth is...
[17:30] ---
    I didn't enjoy my job at all.
[17:37] ---
    Day after day, I had to smile at people
    while lying to their faces.
[17:41] ---
    I tricked them into bad contracts.
[17:45] ---
    The praise from the higher-ups,
    the company's acknowledgement...
[17:52] ---
    The gorgeous models I dated...
[17:54] ---
    Dining out with big-time politicians
    and famous athletes...
[18:00] ---
    ...didn't make me happy at all.
[18:07] ---
    Hey, Akira!
[18:09] ---
    I was just showing off!
[18:12] ---
    I was just lying to myself
    to feel less empty inside.
[18:14] ---
    So, I pretended like I was having fun.
[18:17] ---
    I was a horrible person...
    always bragging!
[18:21] ---
    I'm the one who needs to say I'm sorry!
[18:24] ---
    I really am!
[18:26] ---
    I'm sorry!
[18:30] ---
    Well, that makes sense.
[18:34] ---
    That fun-loving panache of yours
[18:36] ---
    always came through to make sure
    we were all having fun!
[18:43] ---
    That's right!
[18:45] ---
    I wanted a job where I could
    sincerely entertain my clients.
[18:53] ---
    I actually...
[18:56] ---
    wanted to be a stand-up comic!
[19:07] ---
    In that case...
[19:09] ---
    Just quit already
    and become one right now!
[19:20] ---
    Take it from me!
[19:22] ---
    You should always listen to your friends
    when they give you advice!
[19:25] ---
    If you're a stand-up comic, get ready
    and show me you can jump that distance!
[19:31] ---
    Y-Yeah!
[20:14] ---
    Hey, Akira! Give me a hand!
[20:17] ---
    This time, it isn't a joke!
[20:20] ---
    Is this how I'm going to die?!
[20:23] ---
    Completely buck naked?!
[20:34] ---
    Akira!
[20:36] ---
    Up you go!
[20:47] ---
    What's the matter, Kencho?!
[20:48] ---
    Were you bitten by a zombie?
[20:49] ---
    I scraped...
[20:51] ---
    my balls!
[20:58] ---
    I didn't expect you to cry out like a baby.
[21:02] ---
    And buck naked too...
[21:03] ---
    You idiot.
[21:04] ---
    It was highly sophisticated new material,
    inspired by my rebirth as an entertainer.
[21:09] ---
    New? You always do naked jokes.
[21:12] ---
    I'll be doing that more often from here on.
[21:16] ---
    Oh man, I'd really like to stand on a stage.
[21:20] ---
    Hey, do you have
    any connections from work?
[21:23] ---
    Work? What's that? I've never done it.
[21:27] ---
    Who's the one who looked like he was going
    to die from working at an exploitative company?!
[21:30] ---
    You looked worse than the zombies!
[21:33] ---
    What the hell?
[21:34] ---
    You?! A stand-up comic?!
[21:36] ---
    What kind of comic cries?
[21:47] ---
    Anyway, you were
    seriously amazing today!
[21:51] ---
    Guys who quit their jobs, drop everything
    and move on with their lives...
[21:56] ---
    tend to be really successful later on.
[21:59] ---
    Like entrepreneurs or artists...
[22:03] ---
    You might even be...
[22:07] ---
    the guy who saves us all
    from the zombie infection.
[22:15] ---
    Me?
[22:16] ---
    No way. That's not gonna happen.
[22:19] ---
    Yeah, probably not.
[22:20] ---
    That ain't happening.
[22:27] ---
    Whoa, I just thought up a new bit!
[22:29] ---
    It probably involves
    you getting naked, doesn't it?
[22:37] ---
    32. DRINK AND LAUGH WITH MY BEST BUD
    33. MEET THE WOMAN OF MY DREAMS
[22:39] ---
    Being bored
[22:41] ---
    With nothing but efficient days
[22:44] ---
    Sure that's fine
[22:46] ---
    But it's kind of a waste, right?
[22:48] ---
    When I think today could be my last
[22:51] ---
    Steve would start to make a bitter smile;
    Let's start something

[22:55] ---
    Life & Death
[22:57] ---
    How many times has it been already?
    And yet...

[23:00] ---
    I can't stop; like a junkie
[23:04] ---
    One more time, c'mon, one more time
[23:07] ---
    Let's go all the way
    to the end of the world, yeah

[23:12] ---
    C'mon, I want to find happiness
[23:15] ---
    You can leave the key behind
[23:17] ---
    If I can live and laugh,
    that's good enough

[23:20] ---
    C'mon, even a place that has nothing
[23:23] ---
    Has to have something
[23:25] ---
    How about it? All right!
[23:27] ---
    Let's get excited about today!
[23:29] ---
    C'mon, here in this hell, the earth
[23:31] ---
    I want to keep laughing with you
[23:35] ---
    Living on a whim
[23:37] ---
    C'mon, everything is coming undone
[23:39] ---
    So c'mon, let's start anew
[23:43] ---
    All right! Let's enjoy today
[23:46] ---
    We can take detours
[23:48] ---
    If you feel like singing, that's fine
[23:50] ---
    Until the day everything ends
[24:01] ---
    Next time:
    Flight Attendant of the Dead