E12 - My Wife Is The Best

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Kosugi
[00:17] Takuma
    Th-This is Mamoru-kun.
[00:19] Takuma
    He was originally a Mimamorius 3,
    a robot that looks after elderly people.
[00:26] Takuma
    One thing or another resulted in him
    inheriting Mina-chan's characteristics.
[00:31] Emi/Daisuke
    Oh yeah?
[00:32] Mamoru
    Good morning.
[00:36] Emi
    That makes him just like her child.
[00:41] Takuma
    Y-Yeah.
[00:44] Takuma
    That's right.
SIGN    #12 My Wife Is The Best
[02:18] Takuma
    The truth is, well... I think so too.
[02:22] Emi
    Hello, Mamoru-chan.
[02:25] Emi
    Do you know what "hello" means?
[02:27] Mamoru
    Hello?
[02:28] Emi
    That's right.
[02:29] Mamoru
    "Hello" is a greeting for
    when you meet someone.
[02:32] Emi
    Well! Listen to you.
[02:34] Mamoru
    "Good morning" when you wake up.
[02:36] Emi
    That's right.
[02:37] Mamoru
    "Good night" when you go to sleep.
[02:38] Emi
    Right, right.
[02:40] Daisuke
    Huh.
[02:41] Mamoru
    I can also say "time to eat"
    and "thanks for the meal!"
[02:44] Emi
    Oh my, Mamoru-chan, you're amazing.
[02:50] Daisuke
    They do some impressive work
    with robots these days.
[02:53] Takuma
    Y-Yeah, really.
[02:57] Emi
    Huh?
[03:05] Daisuke
    H-Hey...
[03:10] Emi
    Oh wow!
[03:13] Emi
    His laugh is just like Takuma's!
[03:15] Daisuke
    It's true.
[03:17] Takuma
    No, it's not. I don't laugh like that.
[03:21] Emi
    No, when you were little.
[03:24] Emi
    If something made you happy,
    you'd giggle like that.
[03:30] Takuma
    Really?
[03:31] Emi
    Can even robots take after someone?
[03:33] Daisuke
    That can't be possible.
[03:35] Mamoru
    Just like Takuma?
[03:36] Emi
    Yes, just like him when he was little.
[03:41] Mamoru
    Takuma was a robot?
[03:43] Takuma
    Huh?
[03:45] Emi
    No, no.
[03:46] Emi
    You laugh the same way he used to.
[03:49] Emi
    "Eheeheehee, eheeheehee."
[03:55] Emi
    That's so cute.
[03:57] Daisuke
    He's pretty cute.
[04:00] Emi
    Hey, Takuma, about how much
    does one like him cost?
[04:04] Takuma
    I'm not actually sure. He was a gift.
[04:07] Emi
    Oh.
[04:08] Takuma
    Want me to look it up?
[04:10] Takuma
    Mi... Mi... Mimamorius. Here we go.
[04:13] Takuma
    I'll send the URL to your phone.
[04:17] Emi
    You know, there's something
    else I'd like to ask about.
[04:20] Takuma
    What?
[04:21] Emi
    You're Mina-chan's owner, right?
[04:25] Takuma
    Yeah, I registered first thing.
[04:27] Emi
    Would you consider switching that to me?
[04:32] Takuma
    Huh?
[04:33] Takuma
    What for?
[04:34] Emi
    This is just how I see things,
[04:37] Emi
    but for you to have "ownership" of the girl
    you're calling your wife just seems...
[04:43] Emi
    creepy.
[04:48] Daisuke
    Does it matter if she's not his real wife?
[04:52] Emi
    But isn't she the real thing to you, Takuma?
[04:58] Mamoru
    Takuma?
[05:02] Emi
    She is, isn't she?
[05:04] Takuma
    Yeah.
[05:05] Emi
    Then I want you to transfer it to me.
[05:07] Emi
    Or to your father.
[05:11] Emi
    Because your family is not your property.
[05:14] (Flashback) senpai
    So, yeah.
[05:16] (Flashback) senpai
    Family, huh?
[05:19] (Flashback) Iida
    Because then, she's part of the customer's
    valued family, not a company product.
[05:26] (Flashback) Koshiro
    If you say this robot is your wife, take
    that sort of thing into account too.
[05:36] Takuma
    I think if we talked to Mina-chan,
    we'd be able to transfer ownership.
[05:45] Mina
    I do not recommend transferring ownership.
[05:48] Takuma
    Huh?
[05:48] Emi
    Why's that?
[05:50] Mina
    The actions we robots take are carried
    out in the name of our owner's rights.
[05:56] Mina
    If my owner is in some other location,
[05:58] Mina
    I could not even peel an apple
    without that person's permission.
[06:04] Emi
    Couldn't we set things up like,
    "My permission is unnecessary,"
[06:07] Emi
    or, "When it's time for action,
    abide by Takuma's wishes"?
[06:12] Mina
    That can be done.
[06:14] Emi
    In that case...
[06:15] Mina
    But there is a possibility
    I would not be
[06:17] Mina
    able to react immediately
    in unexpected situations.
[06:21] Emi
    Then could we make it, "When
    unexpected situations occur,
[06:25] Emi
    leave the decisions to Takuma"?
[06:29] Daisuke
    Yeah.
[06:38] Mina
    That can be done.
[06:40] Emi
    Do you... not like the idea?
[06:49] Takuma
    Are you against it?
[06:52] Emi
    Why are you against it?
[06:54] Mina
    There is no logical reason.
[06:57] Emi
    What sort it is doesn't matter, just tell us.
[07:00] Takuma
    Yeah.
[07:03] Mina
    A robot acts to protect all human life,
[07:07] Mina
    but the owner's life receives top priority.
[07:11] Mina
    In the event my ownership is
    transferred to satisfy Emi-sama,
[07:15] Mina
    and there comes a time when both
    your lives are equally in danger,
[07:19] Mina
    I would have to save her.
[07:24] Mina
    This is the most important part of me.
[07:28] Mina
    I would be rendered utterly
    incapable of performing it.
[07:34] Mina
    Emi-sama, please do not
    take my job away from me.
[07:46] Takuma
    I-I don't... want to hand
    her over to anyone, either!
[07:52] Takuma
    No matter how it may seem!
[08:04] Emi
    That's fine, then. Sure.
SIGN    Ichijo Robotics Inc.
SIGN    Support
SIGN    Through business operations such as offers for products
    and services, we sometimes collect and use personal
     customer data in order to contribute toward an enhanced
    customer experience and ongoing community development.
[08:11] Takuma
    So, we'll keep me as primary owner,
    and make Mom secondary owner.
[08:18] Takuma
    This way, even if I run into some kind
    of trouble and lose ownership rights,
[08:23] Takuma
    Mina's memories won't get encrypted.
[08:27] Takuma
    Also, looks like if Mina-chan
    decides there's a problem
[08:30] Takuma
    with her relationship with her primary owner,
[08:33] Takuma
    she'll be free to seek safe
    haven with her secondary owner.
[08:39] Takuma
    How about setting things up that way for now?
[08:42] Emi
    Sounds good to me.
[08:45] Takuma
    What about you, Mina-chan?
[08:47] Mina
    No problem.
[08:50] Takuma
    Okay.
[08:53] Daisuke
    Y'know, robots are so interesting.
[08:58] Daisuke
    We hardly ever see any,
    living out in the country.
[09:03] Takuma
    Dad.
[09:06] Daisuke
    What's up?
[09:08] Takuma
    Well, sorry.
[09:11] Takuma
    That I couldn't bring home a human wife.
[09:16] Daisuke
    What're you talkin' about?
[09:17] Takuma
    Huh?
[09:18] Daisuke
    For me, it's a relief you're not all alone.
[09:22] Daisuke
    But sure, I'd be lying if I said
    I didn't prefer a human wife.
[09:27] Takuma
    Also that I couldn't show
    you a grandchild's face.
[09:31] Daisuke
    Cut it out, silly.
[09:33] Daisuke
    You know how it is with people.
[09:35] Daisuke
    They're born because it
    was their parents' idea.
[09:38] Daisuke
    Like, you want to hold the child of the
    one you love, or accidents happen.
[09:41] Daisuke
    There are reasons and excuses,
    but, eh, it all stems from ego.
[09:46] Daisuke
    Even if you can take steps before and
    after to make it all for the best,
[09:50] Daisuke
    that never changes the fact it
    happened because someone wanted it.
[09:54] Daisuke
    That's why I think sometimes,
    it's okay to say "no thanks."
[10:00] Daisuke
    Don't worry about how we feel about it.
[10:02] Daisuke
    You dwell too much on
    what other people think.
[10:06] Daisuke
    Don't be so quick to apologize.
[10:11] Takuma
    Okay.
SIGN    Gold general
[10:19] Daisuke
    Mamoru, you're playing with shogi pieces?
[10:22] Mamoru
    Shogi? What's shogi?
[10:25] Daisuke
    I'll teach it to you.
[10:30] Akari
    I'm home.
[10:32] Takuma
    Welcome home.
[10:35] Akari
    Huh? Onii-chan!
[10:36] Takuma
    Hello.
[10:38] Mina
    Hello, Akari-sama.
[10:39] Akari
    Mina-san too! What's going on?
[10:42] Takuma
    We dropped by for introductions.
[10:44] Akari
    Introductions?
[10:47] Akari
    He brought Mina-san here to
    introduce her as his wife?!
[10:50] Akari
    I wanted...
[10:53] Akari
    I wanted to be here for that!
[10:55] Takuma
    What's wrong, Akari?
[10:57] Mamoru
    Akari, what's wrong?
[11:01] Akari
    Is this Mamoru-kun, who I
    heard about from Mina-san?!
[11:05] Mamoru
    Hi there!
[11:09] Akari
    He's not quite the same
    as on the TV commercials.
[11:14] Takuma
    A-About that.
[11:18] Akari
    Huh?
[11:20] Akari
    His main program isn't running?
[11:22] Akari
    He learned? He's irregular?
[11:25] Akari
    He runs on his own, based
    on Mina-san's program?
[11:30] Akari
    Huh? Huh?
[11:34] Akari
    Does that mean...
[11:40] Akari
    Main program. Learned. Irregular.
[11:44] Akari
    Runs... on his own...
    based on... Mina-san...
[11:48] Takuma
    A-Akari?
[11:56] Mamoru
    Call an ambulance?
[11:57] Mina
    Please do not.
[11:59] Takuma
    Hey, Akari. Get a grip!
[12:01] Akari
    Wait. Wait, wait.
[12:03] Akari
    Don't feed me so much news at once.
[12:08] Takuma
    Huh?
[12:09] Akari
    It'll drive me crazy.
[12:13] Takuma
    Would you mind not putting
    your own spin on our news?
[12:20] Emi
    Welcome home. We have curry.
[12:22] Daisuke
    Mina-chan made it.
[12:25] Akari
    My heart is so full right now.
[12:26] Akari
    If anything, I have heartburn.
[12:28] Mamoru
    Call an ambulance?
[12:30] Mina
    Please do not.
SIGN    Kosugi
[12:42] Emi
    The curry was delicious,
    Mina-chan. See you again.
[12:46] Akari
    I'll get in touch. Let's go shopping again.
[12:49] Mina
    Very well.
[12:51] Daisuke
    See ya, Mamoru.
[12:52] Mamoru
    Goodbye.
[12:54] Takuma
    We'll visit again.
[12:55] Daisuke
    Yeah, you keep at it.
[12:57] Takuma
    Sure.
[13:03] Akari
    Take care! See you!
[13:06] Emi
    Akari, do you have Mina-chan's
    personal contact info?
[13:11] Akari
    Sure do.
[13:12] Emi
    Share it with me!
[13:16] Akari
    How much is it worth to you?
[13:19] Akari
    You're trying to do
    business with your parent?
[13:25] Mina
    Takuma-sama.
[13:28] Mina
    Was it a proper introductory visit?
[13:33] Takuma
    It was just right.
[13:36] Mina
    That is good.
SIGN    Several Days Later
[13:46] Takuma
    This taste...
[13:48] Takuma
    It sure takes me back.
[13:49] Mina
    Emi-sama taught me how to make it.
[13:52] Takuma
    It's nostalgic...
[13:57] Takuma
    But I think maybe now, I like
    the way yours tastes better.
[14:02] Mina
    Very well.
[14:08] deliveryman
    Delivery for you!
[14:09] Emi
    Coming!
SIGN    Delicate
    Equipment
SIGN    Handle
    with care
[14:10] deliveryman
    Thank you!
[14:16] Emi
    I bought one!
[14:19] Emi
    Let's see.
SIGN    Monitoring robot
    Mimamorius 3
[14:20] Emi
    First, "Push on the head to start it up."
[14:29] Mimamorius 3
    Nice to meet you.
[14:32] Mimamorius 3
    I am Mimamorius 3, a monitoring robot.
[14:35] Emi
    What a deep voice.
[14:37] Emi
    So...
[14:38] Emi
    "Once it's started up,
    enjoy some conversation."
SIGN    Monitoring robot
    Mimamorius 3
[14:41] Emi
    "Mimamorius 3 has a low voice that
    senior citizens find easy to hear,
[14:47] Emi
    so you can converse with it free of concern."
[14:49] Mimamorius 3
    First, please give me a name.
[14:53] Emi
    Umm, okay, I'll call you John-kun.
[14:56] Mimamorius 3
    Very well.
[14:58] Mimamorius 3
    I am John.
[15:00] Emi
    Yep, that's one deep voice.
[15:09] John
    That is a bit heavy on sodium and fat.
[15:11] John
    Taking your respective ages into account,
    it would seem prudent to cut back.
[15:18] Daisuke
    Can you believe it!
[15:20] Emi
    Oh, honey, you kidder!
[15:22] John
    Please go to bed soon.
SIGN    Travel Monthly
[15:25] John
    Adequate sleep is very important for
    maintaining physical and mental health.
[15:36] John
    Emi-sama, good night.
[15:39] Emi
    Somehow, this isn't what I was expecting.
[15:43] Emi
    He doesn't go "ehee."
SIGN    I see. So, you're hoping for a single-family residence?
[15:55] Takuma
    Yes. My family has grown, and
    our apartment feels cramped now.
SIGN    Moving Beavers
SIGN    This one is an older house, but I suspect it's plenty spacious.
SIGN    Takuma
    Mina
    Mamoru
[16:08] Takuma
    Hup.
[16:11] Mina
    Are you sure I should not help?
[16:14] Takuma
    Yeah, it's fine.
[16:16] Takuma
    If she does anything besides cook,
[16:18] Takuma
    that add-on program announcement
    will play endlessly again.
[16:23] Takuma
    Maybe you could think about how
    we'll arrange things in the kitchen.
[16:26] Mina
    I will go look.
[16:29] Mamoru
    Takuma!
[16:31] Takuma
    Ayoomp.
[16:34] Takuma
    Done!
[16:37] Takuma
    Behold, Mamoru-kun. A cardboard maze!
[16:42] Takuma
    That arrow is the starting point.
[16:44] Takuma
    You'll clear it once you get
    that die cushion at the top,
[16:47] Takuma
    then bring it back to the start.
[16:51] Takuma
    You in?
[16:52] Mamoru
    In!
[16:53] Mamoru
    In in in in in in!
[16:55] Takuma
    Okay, then I'm going to
    time how long it takes you.
[16:59] Takuma
    Stand by at the starting point.
[17:01] Mamoru
    I'm there.
[17:02] Takuma
    Ready!
[17:06] Takuma
    Start!
[17:12] Takuma
    Once I said we were moving to
    a place with a bit more space,
[17:15] Takuma
    they sent along all the books, games,
    and such I'd left behind at my parents'.
[17:19] Takuma
    I wasn't sure what to do with it all, but...
[17:35] Takuma
    W-Wait, wait, Mamoru-kun.
[17:38] Takuma
    Doesn't that defeat the
    purpose of building a maze?
[17:42] Mamoru
    Does it?
[17:43] Takuma
    Yeah.
[17:44] Takuma
    I'm impressed, but let's
    say climbing's not allowed.
[17:55] Takuma
    Well, Mina-chan?
[17:58] Mina
    It is spacious and clean.
[17:59] Takuma
    Looks like they had just
    renovated the kitchen.
[18:03] Takuma
    I chose this place in the
    hope that you would enjoy it.
[18:08] Mina
    You are the one who will enjoy it.
[18:10] Mina
    You will get to eat even tastier food.
[18:14] Takuma
    That's true.
[18:15] Mina
    Take a look.
[18:16] Mina
    The stove has four burners.
[18:18] Takuma
    Sure does.
[18:24] Mina
    Darling, what would you like
    to eat on your first day here?
[18:28] Takuma
    Huh? "Darling"?
[18:30] Mina
    Would Tak-kun like some housewarming soba?
[18:34] Takuma
    Hold on, what's gotten into you?
[18:36] Mina
    Emi-sama was calling Daisuke-sama
    things like "Dear" and
[18:40] Mina
    "Honey," so I did some online research.
[18:44] Mina
    It seems there are numerous ways
    of addressing one's spouse.
[18:47] Takuma
    Well, that's true.
[18:49] Mina
    I think I will search for the
    one you like best, Taku-chan.
[18:53] Takuma
    "Taku-chan"...
[18:55] Takuma
    Uh, aren't you going to
    ask me which I'd prefer?
[18:58] Mina
    If you order it, I will comply.
[19:00] Takuma
    Oh, well, it's not an order,
    but wouldn't it be faster?
[19:04] Mina
    No problem, Taku-pyon. I have
    generated a unique algorithm
[19:08] Mina
    to determine your preferences.
[19:11] Takuma
    Right.
[19:13] Mina
    I cannot rely on the things
    you say, Takuma-kun.
[19:15] Mina
    You claim that every dish is delicious.
[19:18] Mina
    There are also "Ta-chin," "Papa," and "Dad."
[19:22] Takuma
    Sounds like it'll take a
    while to decide on one.
[19:25] Mina
    Trying them all out is also an option.
[19:27] Mina
    Darling, dear, honey, Tak-kun,
    Taku-chan, Taku-pyon.
[19:33] Takuma
    This is like Tikki Tikki Tembo.
[19:41] Mina
    It looks like Mamoru is tired too.
[19:43] Takuma
    He spent all day zooming around.
[19:46] Mina
    Are you not tired as well, Taku-Taku?
[19:48] Takuma
    I'm fine.
[19:51] Takuma
    Well, time for bed.
[19:52] Mina
    Yes.
[19:53] Takuma
    Good night.
[19:54] Mina
    Good night.
[20:06] Takuma
    My new life begins.
SIGN    We've moved.
SIGN    Please drop in when you
    happen to be nearby.
SIGN    Kosugi Takuma Mina Mamoru
SIGN    Ichijo Robotics Inc.
[21:21] Mamoru
    Takuma! It's morning!
[21:24] Mamoru
    Get up, Takuma! Get up!
[21:39] Takuma
    And as for what she ultimately
    chose to call me...
[21:46] Takuma
    Mina-chan.
[21:48] Takuma
    Mamoru-kun.
[21:49] Mamoru
    Good morning, Takuma.
[21:56] Mina
    Good morning, Takuma-sama.
[22:02] Takuma
    Good morning.