E5 - An Iron Giant Appears!

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:07] A
    Wh-What the heck is this?!
[00:13] Fan
    Tsubame, I'm a huge fan!
[00:15] M
    Hey! Thanks for your support.
[00:17] Fan
    I'm rooting for you!
[00:22] A
    Whoa... Whoa, whoa, whoa!
[00:26] M
    Asakusa?!
[00:29] A
    I found a robot!
[00:31] M
    A robot?!
[00:32] A
    It was under a sheet, but the
    shape was a giant robot.
[00:36] A
    I could tell where the head and shoulders were!
[00:39] A
    Something is definitely going on in this school!
[00:42] M
    Let's go! I wanna see it, too!
[00:52] A
    Mizusaki, it's a bad idea to just waltz in.
[00:56] M
    I don't see anything.
[00:57] A
    Huh... It's gone.
SIGN    Iron Giant Left Side
[01:07] A
    "Iron Giant—"
[01:08] M
    There's a bunch of robot books over here!
SIGN    Science
SIGN    Shibahama Industrial
SIGN    Introduction to Robotics
SIGN    Constructing Heavy Machinery
[01:11] A
    Wait.
[01:12] A
    Look at the floor. These are robot footprints!
[01:17] Goto
    Who are you two?!
[01:20] A
    Out the window we go!
[01:33] A
    Mizusaki's down...
[01:35] A
    Mysterious pursuers, a missing robot...
[01:38] A
    And Mizusaki, who has been captured!
[01:40] A
    I had thought this was going
    to be giant robot sci-fi,
[01:42] A
    but now it's got the scent
    of robot crime instead.
[01:49] A
    The left side of the iron giant...
    It's bigger than I thought!
[01:52] A
    It really is giant robot sci-fi!
SIGN    Lost Shibahama Civilization
SIGN    A unique brand of shamanism that developed into a peculiar scientific culture (maybe)
SIGN    A robot
SIGN    The exterior doesn't
    lock the joints in
     a particular position
SIGN    Drive system pipes
SIGN    "archaco technology" details the advanced ancient civilization that existed in Anadoro (present day Shibahama) which had a tradition of worshiping humanoid robots
    
     Though not designed for combat,
    its size and strength would
     make it quite formidable.
    It's defenses were
     extremely weak.
    The metal is the color
    of brass.
[01:55] A
    A lost civilization existed
    in ancient Shibahama! Maybe.
SIGN    Ancient Anadoro writing
SIGN    Joints
SIGN    This is a kind of
     pronunciation key
SIGN    Shaky joints
     are the fate
     of all robots
     with
     exoskeletons!
SIGN    Six fingers
SIGN    Doesn't open
     in the front
SIGN    Inuit snow goggles
SIGN    These are heels
SIGN    Joints with exposed open
    spaces on both sides make
    it seem vaguely biological.
[02:00] A
    Do those mysterious footprints point
    to the existence of a giant robot?!
SIGN    Hydraulics
SIGN    Hold the drawstring
SIGN    What kind of robot would
     make sense at a school?
SIGN    Mysterious Footprints!!
     Does the Giant Robot Really Exist?
     From the "Exploring Shibahama" Series
SIGN    Slacks type
SIGN    Human body type
SIGN    Gaiter type
SIGN    Mechanical type
SIGN    Not the most practical
SIGN    Beauty of form!
SIGN    Kneecap armor
SIGN    Imagining the rest
     of the body based
     on the footprint
    isn't impossible,
     but...
SIGN    Gaiter
SIGN    Indicative
     of a
     particular
     designer
SIGN    Speculating on the torso
    based on the legs.
[02:04] ---
    The Asakusa Expedition Series:
SIGN    When the form resembles a
    living creature, it comes across
     as kind of monstrous and scary
SIGN    The mechanical-type's strengths are clear
    from it's speed and horsepower. Uses weapons primarily
    in battle, but also has a force field.
     A bad fit for school!
[02:05] ---
    "Speculating on the Whole Body
    Based on the Footprint."
SIGN    Trapezoid
     aperture.
SIGN    Sword
SIGN    The slacks-type is a robot with a natural outline, and it's hard to predict its capabilities. It's kind of scary so I wouldn't want it showing up at school! There's also cases where it will purge it's armor to reveal a more biological-looking core body.
SIGN    Has lots of
     jetpacks
SIGN    Joints snap shut like a jaw.
[02:18] ---
    The robot!
[02:20] ---
    Something about how plain it looks
    makes it more realistic, and scary.
[02:24] ---
    Like, it'd barely be able to walk. It's so blocky!
[02:27] ---
    And it's got an action camera for an eye!
[02:29] Kobayashi
    Weapons development is behind schedule.
[02:32] A
    Kanamori?!
[02:33] K
    Would this really be able to kill them?
[02:35] Kobayashi
    We're not bloodthirsty.
    Suppression is good enough.
[02:39] M
    So...
[02:41] M
    No weapons, then?
[02:42] A
    Mizusaki!
[02:44] A
    She's been brainwashed...
    I can't believe they got her!
[02:47] A
    It's now clear that 66%
    of the Eizouken's members
[02:50] A
    are involved with this giant robot!
[02:53] A
    But wait... the way things are going,
[02:55] A
    the two of them being bad
    guys could be a red herring,
[02:57] A
    when in reality, I'm the real
    bad guy! And I have amnesia!
[03:01] Goto
    It can shoot a rocket from its arm.
[03:05] M
    Nice. Can you fire it?
[03:07] Goto
    No, not here. It'd be too dangerous.
[03:14] Goto
    Hey, it hit somebody!
[03:16] M
    Wait, Asakusa?
[03:18] Kobayashi
    Aw, shoot! Someone get a towel!
[03:19] K
    As usual, she has incredible timing.
[03:23] A
    What the heck is that thing?
[03:26] Kobayashi
    This is Talos.
[03:27] Kobayashi
    A giant model robot that's been passed
    down through the robot club's history,
[03:31] Kobayashi
    and although it's undergone modifications,
     it dates back over 100 years!
[03:35] Kobayashi
    The robot club's roots can be
    traced back to the late 1800s,
[03:38] Kobayashi
    before anyone knew what a "robot" was,
[03:41] Kobayashi
    with a collection of individuals
    who studied French culture,
[03:44] Kobayashi
    and were fascinated with "The Future Eve."
[03:46] Kobayashi
    With the dawn of the 1900s, Japan created
     Asia's first robot, Gakutensoku,
[03:52] Kobayashi
    which led to a shift in the
    group's focus to giant robots.
[03:55] Kobayashi
    And after basing their first model
    on the robot from 1952's
[03:59] Kobayashi
    The King and the Mockingbird,
    it's continued to be modified...
[04:02] Kobayashi
    To this very day!
[04:05] K
    They've just been changing the head—
[04:06] A
    Don't!
[04:07] A
    What are you two doing here, anyway?
[04:10] K
    They're hiring us to make an
    anime based on this robot.
[04:15] A
    Robot! Anime! Fun...
[04:19] A
    Wait, what's the catch?
[04:20] K
    If nothing else, we'll be getting paid.
[04:23] A
    You're such a money-grubber!
[04:24] A
    Bam!
[04:25] K
    You accept money in order to
    accept responsibility for a job!
[04:29] K
    Pay exists to ensure a
    quality standard for labor.
[04:33] K
    If we're accepting money for this job,
[04:34] K
    it means we have an obligation
    to deliver to a certain standard.
[04:38] ---
    Which sounds more wholesome:
[04:40] ---
    accepting money for something
    and being responsible for it,
[04:42] ---
    or not getting paid and not
    caring how it turns out?
[04:45] M
    Yeah, but wouldn't not
    having to worry about money
[04:47] M
    and just making anime be the best?
[04:50] A
    I was thinking that!
[04:51] K
    Absolutely not!
[04:53] K
    It's 3.5 meters in height,
[04:55] K
    weighs 4.7 tons, and can
     move at up to 70 km/h...
[04:59] M
    That's fast... Wait, this thing can run?!
[05:01] A
    Nah, that ain't happening.
    It's got no power source.
[05:04] M
    It says they want it to fight a giant monster.
[05:06] A
    I don't see how it can be all that giant.
[05:08] Goto
    I mean... three meters is pretty big!
[05:11] Ono
    Building-sized giant monsters are unrealistic!
[05:14] A
    I dunno about buildings, but a
    giraffe is taller than this thing.
[05:17] A
    If the monster is only three meters tall,
[05:19] A
    wouldn't a heavy machine gun do the job?
[05:21] Ono
    Shooting in the middle of
    the city is too dangerous,
[05:23] Ono
    so they need the robot to take it down!
[05:25] M
    Wouldn't ramming it with a truck be easier?
[05:27] K
    It says that the monster has a heat attack.
[05:29] M
    Okay, now that is unrealistic!
[05:31] A
    Maybe a fire-breathing giraffe...
[05:31] K
    I'd like to get a broad estimate on the budget,
[05:33] A
    No, it could be a rhino that threatens
    to burn the whole city down.
[05:34] K
    so I can break down the time frame
    and the work hours involved.
[05:35] A
    Like how the Asian bombardier beetle can
[05:36] A
    emit a gas that's over 100 degrees Celsius.
[05:38] M
    Seriously?
[05:39] M
    You'd need a machine gun for sure.
[05:40] A
    Y'know, "massive frontal profile"
[05:41] K
    It'll also help with my analysis,
    which is already under way,
[05:41] A
    is basically giant humanoid
    robots in a nutshell.
[05:43] K
    and knowing exactly how much
    more I need to figure out.
[05:45] M
    Having an opening in the front
    would be like an exposed weakness,
[05:48] M
    so wouldn't it make more sense
    for the hatch to be on the back?
[05:49] Robot Club
    These...
[05:50] Robot Club
    ...girls...
[05:51] Robot Club
    ...are...
[05:51] Robot Club
    ...annoying!
SIGN    Episode 5 An Iron Giant Appears!
SIGN    Keep
SIGN    Your
SIGN    Hands
SIGN    Off
SIGN    Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken!
SIGN    Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken!
[07:26] K
    Is this it?
[07:28] A
    Seems like it.
[07:29] M
    Man, it goes so far down!
[07:33] A
    This underground pit is supposed
    to predate the school's construction.
[07:35] K
    Why, exactly?
[07:36] A
    They built it beforehand to make it easier
    to maintain pipes and the like.
[07:40] M
    This is absolutely the kind of
    place a creature would pop up!
[07:45] M
    Are you scared, Asakusa?
[07:48] M
    All right, let's start scouting the location
    for our robot-versus-monster battle!
[07:52] A
    But I don't like being scared!
[07:53] M
    You're the one who wanted to
    stage the battle down here.
[08:01] M
    And we're already stuck.
[08:03] A
    It's rusted shut.
[08:04] A
    I think I've got some oil...
[08:10] A
    Scared...
[08:11] A
    Well, it didn't open! Let's leave!
[08:13] K
    There's no such thing as
    a door that doesn't open.
[08:15] K
    A door's whole job is opening.
[08:18] K
    So do your damn job!
[08:19] ---
    
[08:21] M
    Classic Kanamori! She can even get
    inanimate objects to fall in line.
[08:25] K
    Considering this isn't live action,
    is location scouting really necessary?
[08:28] A
    Experience makes a difference.
[08:30] K
    For the record, I'm not here
    to play explorer with you two.
[08:33] A
    It helps stoke...
[08:36] A
    the imagination.
[08:40] M
    Seems pretty... haunted down here, huh?
SIGN    Asakusa's Anti-Poltergeist Loadout
[08:57] M
    Hey, it's those shoes for kids
    that light up when you walk!
[08:59] A
    We're looking for monsters,
    not ghosts! Get serious!
[09:02] M
    Oh, I'm sorry! What else do
    you have in that bag, Asakusa?
[09:08] A
    I'm not saying!
[09:09] K
    Would you two please focus on this?
[09:12] K
    We're going to have the spotlight
    at the culture festival.
[09:16] A
    You didn't mention that!
[09:17] K
    The theme this year is robots, so the
     robot club will be the big stars.
[09:21] K
    We're doing a promotional video for them,
     which will be good for us, too.
[09:26] M
    That's a pretty big spotlight!
[09:28] A
    I'd settle for a desk lamp.
[09:29] A
    I've always preferred quiet places,
    away from the lights.
[09:32] M
    I thought you were afraid of the dark.
[09:34] K
    If you want people to appreciate your work,
    it needs to see the light of day.
[09:39] A
    Isn't that the exact opposite
    of what we're doing right now?!
[09:42] A
    And for the record, dark places
    don't bother me. Creepy ones do!
[09:50] A
    Those boards are gonna break!
    Walk along the walls!
[09:52] K
    It'll be fine.
[09:53] A
    But they sound so dull. And soft.
[09:55] A
    They're rotten!
[09:56] A
    If there's a big hole underneath, we'll be dead!
[09:59] K
    It looks like there's more space up ahead.
[10:04] M
    Fantastic! This place is perfect!
[10:06] K
    You're taking pictures too, Mizusaki?
[10:08] M
    Of course I am!
[10:09] M
    There's background animation to consider,
[10:11] M
    and the setting influences the movement!
[10:15] M
    Like that beam that looks
    like it could collapse!
[10:27] K
    What exactly are you doing?
[10:28] A
    Picturing the in-frame imagery, I bet.
[10:30] K
    That looks an awful lot like screwing around.
[10:33] A
    Well, it kind of is.
[10:35] A
    We're making something fun.
[10:36] A
    It's better to get out in the world
    than stare at a blank sheet of paper.
[10:40] A
    Locations like this feed your imagination.
[10:42] A
    The things you experience
    personally lead to originality.
[10:45] A
    Do you follow?
[10:47] K
    Over your fear of the dark now?
[10:54] A
    I forgot until you reminded me.
[10:56] M
    Asakusa!
[10:57] M
    Come here for a sec!
[10:59] A
    Whatcha want?
[11:00] M
    I want the monster to blast out of here!
[11:03] A
    From water?
[11:04] ---
    Yeah.
[11:08] A
    From out of the mist it appears...
[11:10] A
    A giant pistol crabtle!
[11:12] M
    Is that the right size?
[11:13] A
    It's a giant monster with
    an arm like a pistol shrimp,
SIGN    A Turtle x Crab
     Monster That Has
     the Claw of a
     Pistol Shrimp!
SIGN    Weight:
     Height:
     Length:
SIGN    Has no tail
SIGN    Pistol Crabtle:
     Combines Crab and
     "tle" from turtle"
SIGN    The shell's thickness can change
     over time. Used defensively,
    but also helps with thermoregulation.
SIGN    Crab liver
SIGN    Crab intestines
SIGN    Crab stomach
SIGN    The crabtle has two arms and four legs.
     These legs are supporting a body
     that weighs over six tons.
SIGN    Crab vision:
    Not particularly
    good or bad
SIGN    Legs are covered in scales
[11:16] A
    that resembles both a crab and a turtle.
[11:18] A
    By locking its open claw, flexing,
    and then releasing the lock,
SIGN    Bam!
SIGN    This part is flexible
SIGN    Locks it's open claw, builds up it's strength, and releases the lock to slam it shut, causing a shockwave. Can defeat an African elephant in an instant. Is more dangerous in the water.
[11:21] A
    the claws snap shut with a ton of force,
     causing a powerful shock wave!
[11:25] A
    It likes to eat Japanese alders
    that grow in wetlands.
SIGN    Likes to eat Japanese alders that grow in wetlands
SIGN    What it looks like when eating
SIGN    Closes with over one ton of force,
     but its opening strength isn't remarkable. Like a crocodile's jaws.
SIGN    Omnivorous; will eat wood,
     aquatic plants, and algae.
SIGN    Here it's eating water
     chestnuts. Will not eat
     them when they are
    still covered in spines.
[11:29] A
    They're generally pretty docile,
     and in the old days,
SIGN    Their relatively docile nature meant that, in the old days, people who lived in the wetlands used them for trade and land development.
[11:31] A
    they helped the people of the wetlands
    with trade and land development!
[11:36] K
    That sounds more like livestock.
[11:39] M
    It's endearing, though.
[11:42] A
    Couldn't you turn it into roast crab
    with a flamethrower, even without a robot?
[11:47] K
    You're going to set the robot club off again.
[11:49] M
    Asakusa, sometimes your focus on
    realism can be pretty harsh on fiction.
[11:53] A
    Facing it will be our robot!
[11:56] M
    What should its weapon be?
[11:58] A
    How about fighting with a chainsaw?
[12:00] M
    Do you know how much work
    those teeth are to draw?!
[12:02] A
    You can't tell them apart when
    it's spinning, so it's fine.
[12:05] A
    The handle!
[12:06] A
    A recoil starter!
[12:14] A
    The pistol crab's special attack
    is the massive shock wave
[12:17] A
    generated when it unlocks
     its claw after flexing!
[12:23] K
    That's kind of like a forehead flick.
[12:28] A
    So the robot digs into the
    ground with the chainsaw...
[12:31] A
    And uses it to move faster!
[12:35] M
    That's really intense! It seems super strong!
[12:37] A
    Let's head back!
[12:38] K
    You're just scared, aren't you?!
[12:41] M
    Asakusa—
[12:42] A
    Hang on, don't push!
[12:51] A
    We fell!
[12:52] K
    I noticed.
[12:54] A
    This is why I said to walk along the walls!
[12:56] M
    We're lucky these leaves were here.
[12:59] M
    And it's nice and warm.
[13:01] M
    Let's calm down and call for―
[13:03] K
    No reception.
[13:06] M
    This place was used to dump leaves.
[13:09] M
    And it's warm because the
    leaves are fermenting!
[13:12] M
    Which means there's gas everywhere...
[13:13] M
    If we stay here for too long, we'll die!
SIGN    Dead
[13:18] A
    At times like this...
[13:20] A
    You take out your rope,
[13:21] A
    take a sock off,
[13:22] A
    put your Swiss army knife in the sock,
[13:25] A
    tie it to the rope, and throw it!
[13:28] A
    Take out your collapsible shovel,
[13:29] A
    pile up the leaves and dirt in one spot,
[13:32] A
    to get some height...
[13:34] A
    And escape!
[13:35] M
    Holy cow.
[13:36] K
    That's just who she is.
[13:39] K
    Now that we've got our
    suggestions for the setting,
[13:42] K
    it's time for a meeting with the robot club.
[13:45] M
    Did you get a haircut, Kanamori?
[13:47] K
    I did.
[13:48] A
    Girls, this is our first paid job!
[13:51] A
    We'll need game faces on in there!
[13:53] M
    I didn't know you could be so motivational.
[13:58] K
    She's awkward in conversations,
[13:59] K
    so she tries to sound quirky
    as an emotional defense.
[14:02] A
    Are you trying to make me more defensive?!
[14:03] K
    The deal is basically done already,
[14:05] K
    so the presentation should
    be a piece of cake.
[14:08] K
    We won't try to sell them
    on our own suggestions,
[14:12] K
    but instead, choose one of
    their suggestions to work on,
[14:14] K
    all while nudging things in
    the direction we want to take.
[14:17] A
    Do you think they'll get mad again?
[14:20] K
    It's not an actual disagreement,
[14:22] K
    so as long as they think they're in charge,
     it'll be a pretty smooth process.
[14:26] K
    But for the worst case scenario...
    It wouldn't hurt to have an advantage.
[14:32] K
    I'll put my feelers out for blackmail bait.
[14:35] Ono
    The eizouken is bad news!
[14:37] Ono
    They're nothing but trouble!
[14:38] Ono
    I heard them mention that nonsense
    about frontal profiles myself!
[14:42] Kobayashi
    There goes Ono, again.
[14:43] Ono
    Those girls don't even enjoy fictional robots!
[14:47] Ono
    The entire reason we wanted this anime made
[14:49] Ono
    was to secure funding for our new giant robot!
[14:53] Kobayashi
    Yeah, but—
[14:54] Ono
    And who are we partnered with?!
[14:55] Ono
    The kind of plebs that would make an
    anime about a robot losing to a tank!
[14:59] Ono
    Even though the entire point of giant
    robots is that they're a fantasy!
[15:03] Ono
    Here! This is the plan I've put together
    to keep the eizouken under control!
[15:07] Goto
    When did you have time to make this?
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
[15:09] Ono
    We need to think seriously
    about one thing!
[15:11] Ono
    Our love for robots, which the
    eizouken could never understand!
[15:14] Ono
    And the beauty of that love, and our ideology!
[15:17] Ono
    At this rate, we're going to be
    responsible for a reprehensible anime,
[15:21] Ono
    with the eizouken cooking up
    something full of homing lasers
[15:21] K
    Excuse us...
[15:23] K
    Excuse us!
[15:24] A
    No response.
[15:24] Ono
    and sudden power ups, instead of realism!
[15:25] M
    He is being loud.
[15:26] Kobayashi
    Ono...
[15:27] Kobayashi
    Wait, Ono!
[15:28] Kobayashi
    Before you said the whole appeal
    of giant robots is the fantasy!
[15:30] K
    Excuse us.
[15:31] K
    We're here.
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
[15:31] Ono
    Before that unrealistic nonsense gets made,
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
[15:35] Ono
    we need to find some advantage
    over the eizouken!
[15:41] K
    Well, our client certainly
    doesn't seem to trust us.
[15:46] Ono
    Forgive me...
[15:48] K
    Such a lack of faith.
[15:49] K
    There have been times when this sort of
    thing could get you executed, you know?
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
[15:52] K
    I think I'll make a record
    of this, for future use.
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
[15:58] A
    Kanamori is really good at negotiating.
[16:01] M
    I don't know if that's what I'd call it.
[16:08] Seki
    Your tea.
[16:10] K
    We've got our documents right here.
[16:12] Ono
    Right...
[16:12] K
    Asakusa, you can show them the actual proposal.
[16:16] A
    Oh, right.
[16:17] K
    The idea is for it to take place on
    the Shibahama High School campus.
[16:21] Kobayashi
    All right...
[16:22] K
    Next are the details on the giant monster.
SIGN    A Turtle x Crab
     Monster That Has
     the Claw of a
     Pistol Shrimp!
SIGN    Weight:
     Height:
     Length:
SIGN    Has no tail
SIGN    Pistol Crabtle:
     Combines Crab and
     "tle" from turtle"
SIGN    The shell's thickness can change over time. Is used defensively, but also helps with thermoregulation.
SIGN    Crab liver
SIGN    Crab intestines
SIGN    Crab stomach
SIGN    The crabtle has two arms
     and four legs. These legs
     are supporting a body
     that weighs over six tons.
SIGN    Crab vision:
    Not particularly
    good or bad
SIGN    Legs are covered in scales
SIGN    View from above
[16:26] Kobayashi
    Is that a turtle?
[16:27] A
    I-It's a crabtle.
[16:29] A
    From combining crab and turtle... crabtle.
[16:33] A
    It can generate shock waves with
    its claws, and has a heat attack.
[16:36] A
    Underwater, it can create
    cavitation by closing its claws,
[16:39] A
    which results in sonoluminescence,
[16:40] A
    the plasma from which reaches
    a temperature of 5000 degrees Kelvin...
[16:44] A
    And a pressure of 1000 millibars.
[16:45] Kobayashi
    W-Whoa, isn't that a little extreme?
[16:48] A
    It's an ability taken from pistol shrimps,
    which live in the Atlantic Ocean.
[16:53] A
    Since it's 507.3 times the size,
    its abilities increase proportionately.
[16:58] A
    The robot sticks the chainsaw on its right arm
[17:01] A
    into the ground in order to move at high speeds.
[17:03] Kobayashi
    This is great, Ono.
[17:05] Kobayashi
    Doesn't sound like there are
    any last minute power-ups,
[17:07] Kobayashi
    but it's just fantastical enough that—
[17:08] Ono
    This is all wrong!
[17:09] Ono
    It can't have a flashy weapon like a chainsaw!
[17:11] Ono
    And it sounds like there's too much action!
[17:13] Ono
    I thought the robot club's goal was
    preaching the merits of down-to-earth,
[17:16] Ono
    real robot aesthetics!
[17:18] M
    But real robots are more like...
[17:20] Ono
    Not what I meant!
[17:21] Ono
    The big ones! That people pilot!
[17:24] A
    Then...
[17:24] Ono
    Not that, either!
[17:27] Ono
    It has to be humanoid and piloted by someone!
[17:29] Ono
    And it fights!
SIGN    Seeing someone stump for such a
    typical contradiction is disheartening.
[17:31] Ono
    It needs to be realistic! Like in
    real life! A real-life giant robot!
[17:35] A
    Realistically speaking, I thought it
    was generally accepted that humanoid robots
[17:38] A
    exceeding a certain size
    have really limited uses.
[17:42] Kobayashi
    It's true that human-scale
    ones could do more jobs.
[17:45] Kobayashi
    They'd be more versatile, I guess.
[17:47] Goto
    It's frustrating, really.
[17:49] Goto
    Even when tanks stop being useful,
[17:51] Goto
    it won't mean bipedal robots being deployed.
[17:53] Goto
    They'll probably just make stronger tanks.
[17:56] Seki
    Yeah, realistically speaking,
    they'd probably evacuate the town
SIGN    Glass
    Bottles
    Fragile
[17:58] Seki
    and then bring out the tanks.
[18:00] Seki
    People who want to make robots
    because of anime run into that fact
[18:04] Seki
    sooner or later...
[18:06] Kobayashi
    But what we're after has always been
    the machines we've admired in movies,
[18:09] Kobayashi
    manga, light novels, and anime.
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
[18:12] M
    So it's reality that doesn't
    care about humanoid robots.
[18:16] M
    Come to think of it, there are
    fewer giant robot anime lately...
[18:20] M
    Should I have not brought that up?
[18:22] A
    Yep.
[18:23] Ono
    I get it.
[18:25] Ono
    I know it's actually impossible!
[18:29] Ono
    I realize that... it's probably impossible.
[18:31] Ono
    But I still want to pilot a robot, okay?!
[18:35] Ono
    So much I could die! Damn it!
[18:38] Ono
    "Anything one man can imagine,
    another man can make real"?!
[18:42] Ono
    Screw whoever said that!
[18:44] Ono
    Even if it's possible, if it
    doesn't happen during my lifetime,
[18:48] Ono
    then that Wells guy sold me a bill of goods!
SIGN    What a huge
     pain in the neck.
[18:50] Ono
    I can see it right now when I close my eyes...
SIGN    I wish I had blackmail material to speed this negotiation along.
[18:55] Ono
    And when I try to think about it
    realistically, it becomes contradictory!
SIGN    Take Down the Eizouken
[18:59] Ono
    I hate how it puts me in this place
    where all I can do is dream!
[19:01] Ono
    I hate it so damn much!
[19:03] K
    I see now.
[19:04] K
    He's not making sense because he
    can't visualize the finished product.
[19:10] K
    That makes him so anxious,
[19:11] K
    all he can manage is a passionate
    plea full of incoherent ranting.
[19:15] K
    If we present a calm response,
[19:18] K
    it should calm him down
    and make controlling them—
[19:21] A
    I wanna travel to the fringes of space!
[19:24] A
    I cry in the bath every night
    about how big the universe is!
[19:27] M
    I try to do a Hadoken every night before bed!
[19:31] K
    You two are crying now?
[19:33] Ono
    I like to imagine I'm in a cockpit
    when I'm on the toilet...
[19:37] Trio
    Comrade!
SIGN    Sudden harmony
[19:39] K
    I have huge problems with people who
    solve problems with emotional appeals.
[19:44] A
    All right, let's modify this robot together!
[19:48] Goto
    You mentioned having the hatch
    in the front would be a weakness,
[19:52] Goto
    and moving it to the back would help, right?
[19:55] A
    In the name of high adventure,
[19:56] A
    we're going to keep it in the front,
    like your actual model Talos.
[19:59] A
    Plus...
[20:03] A
    You can do a shot reverse shot
    with the pilot and robot.
[20:05] A
    Like this...
[20:07] A
    Which makes for a really cool
    depiction of two pilots talking!
[20:11] Kobayashi
    I'm not so sure.
[20:12] Kobayashi
    I think having it open up
    in front seems weaker, too.
[20:16] Ono
    But the back of a robot
    has to look cool, too!
[20:19] A
    Okay, then.
[20:21] A
    In that case, we'll ditch the
    rule of cool on the hatch,
[20:23] A
    and go for a safer choice.
[20:25] K
    She's got a tendency to only enjoy working
[20:27] K
    when there's some odd line
    of reasoning into it.
[20:31] A
    Right here.
[20:32] A
    Let's make the entrance on the top.
[20:35] Kobayashi
    That works.
[20:36] A
    Next up is the cockpit.
[20:39] A
    It's not a cockpit unless
    it looks like this!
[20:41] A
    Analog-style instruments.
[20:43] A
    CRT monitors have good response time.
[20:46] M
    The main monitor seems to have
    a pretty wide range of vision.
[20:49] M
    Is the camera in the mono-eye
    really going to cut it?
[20:51] Goto
    Should we add more?
[20:52] Seki
    Cameras?
[20:53] Ono
    Let's change it.
[20:54] Kobayashi
    Let's change the model and add some.
[20:56] Ono
    We'll add more, and different, cameras!
[20:58] A
    Copy that.
[20:59] Goto
    The kind of cameras and sensors that
    robots use are usually along these lines.
[21:04] Goto
    So if we combine them...
[21:07] A
    Cool!
[21:07] Ono
    Lame!
[21:08] A
    Okay, how about something like this?
[21:11] A
    Ta-dah!
[21:12] Goto
    It's got kind of a classic vibe.
[21:15] M
    Time to activate!
[21:25] K
    Are all these switches
    actually helpful as controls?
[21:28] M
    It shows that the people making robot anime
[21:31] M
    ultimately put their faith in people!
[21:34] M
    I'm disengaging the break!
[21:38] M
    Starboard clear!
[21:40] M
    Port side clear!
[21:42] M
    All clear below!
[21:43] M
    We're rising up! Please brace yourselves!
[21:46] A
    Wasn't it standing already?
[21:49] M
    Time to go for it!
[21:52] A
    All at once?!
[21:54] A
    Oh man, I forgot seat belts!
[21:55] M
    Those are important!
[21:57] M
    We'll partially engage the clutch,
     and then make our way up!
[22:04] M
    That's a lot of Gs!
[22:08] M
    Time to straighten up!
[22:20] Kobayashi
    It... It stood!
[22:23] Seki
    I want a pile bunker!
[22:26] A
    Okay!
[22:26] M
    It'd be a good idea to change
    the body to match the face!
[22:28] A
    A hydraulic cutter! Snip!
[22:30] Kobayashi
    We've come this far, let's go harder!
[22:33] Ono
    How about a drill?
[22:35] A
    A boom-mounted cutting head!
[22:37] Goto
    Is it a hole-digging robot now?!
[22:39] A
    This one, then!
[22:41] Ono
    Those bits are for wood!
[22:42] A
    Ah, you noticed.
[22:44] Ono
    You realize the robot club is a
    technical club, right? Of course I did!
[22:47] Ono
    At least use one for metal!
[22:51] Kobayashi
    It's already got a chainsaw!
    We're gonna need more arms.
[22:54] K
    Can you even animate something
    with all these add-ons?
[22:57] K
    Why not just remove the legs and make it fly?
[23:00] M
    That'd take the fun out of making it move!
[23:02] M
    But... is it okay if we cover up the joints?
[23:07] A
    It's done!
[23:08] Kobayashi
    Holy cow!
[23:09] Goto
    It looks totally different.
[23:13] M
    Isn't it kinda... elaborate?
[23:16] K
    Are you sure you can animate this thing?
[23:19] A
    We ended up with a blue-collar robot!
[23:22] A
    But what'll happen next?!
[23:24] ---
    
SIGN    Fluffy~
SIGN    Gahaha!
SIGN    Illustration by Eito Aika
SIGN    Eito Aika