12 - We Tried Making a Fantasy Story in RPG Style. | Fierce Fights! Arm Wrestling! How Will the Battle of the Heroines End?

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:57] Kyoko
    Kinda chilly down here.
[01:59] Nozomi
    Well, we are dressed like this underground...
[02:02] Hime
    You're doing okay, Suu-chan?
[02:03] Suu
    Yes. This isn't cold enough to bother me.
[02:07] Hime
    Really? Well, good.
[02:12] Nozomi
    This is definitely the way
    to go when it's cold.
[02:15] Hime
    H-Hey, Nozomi-chan...
[02:17] Hime
    What if something jumps out at us?
[02:19] Nozomi
    Oh, something will.
    From around the next corner.
[02:22] Hime
    Jeez, cut that out.
[02:27] Hime
    Uh...
[02:35] Nozomi
    See? There it is.
[02:37] Hime
    It's coming this way!
[02:40] Nozomi
    Yeah, because you keep screaming.
[02:43] Kyoko
    Stay behind us, Sassu-Sassu.
[02:44] Suu
    Okay.
[02:47] Kyoko
    Hime, use your bow.
[02:49] Hime
    Huh? But won't that make the
    Animal Welfare people angry?
[02:53] Nozomi
    You'll be fine. Just look at its face.
[02:56] Nozomi
    See? It's human.
[02:58] Nozomi
    They won't get mad if you shoot a human.
[03:01] Hime
    That doesn't seem right, somehow...
[03:03] Nozomi
    Here it comes!
[03:07] Nozomi
    It dodged that?!
[03:09] Hime
    I'm sorry!
[03:12] Nozomi
    Here we go!
[03:20] Nozomi
    Kyoko, make with the magic!
[03:22] Kyoko
    I know.
[03:23] Kyoko
    Doing it now.
[03:26] Kyoko
    There.
[03:34] Kyoko
    Dora magura, goma magura, sesame magura...
[03:38] Nozomi
    Kyoko, what's the holdup?!
[03:44] Suu
    Hooray, hooray!
[03:47] Suu
    Hooray, hooray!
[03:49] Nozomi
    Sassu-Sassu, what are you doing?
[03:51] Suu
    A victory dance.
[03:53] Suu
    Is it helping?
[03:54] Nozomi
    Well, it's distracting me.
[04:01] Kyoko
    Upsy-daisy.
[04:03] Kyoko
    Okay, here goes.
[04:04] Kyoko
    Burn, flame!
[04:11] Kyoko
    Step back, everyone.
[04:13] Nozomi
    Is this gonna work?
[04:15] Kyoko
    Step back, Nozomi.
[04:33] Nozomi
    Nice one!
[04:34] Kyoko
    I know.
[04:43] Nozomi
    Only two gold? Stingy.
[04:46] Kyoko
    No, no. You've been influenced
    by the real world too much.
[04:50] Hime
    If it had money, doesn't that mean
    it was an intelligent being?
[04:54] Suu
    It didn't look like one to me.
[04:57] Kyoko
    It's probably like how crows
    collect shiny things.
[05:01] Nozomi
    I mean, it's really just a monster, isn't it?
[05:03] Hime
    What?!
[05:05] Nozomi
    Which means this labyrinth
    is a haunted house.
[05:08] Nozomi
    A slightly active one.
[05:09] Hime
    I don't do so well in haunted houses...
[05:12] Kyoko
    Only because you have a bad memory
[05:14] Kyoko
    of getting spooked and breaking
    something with your butt, right?
[05:17] Hime
    How did you know?
[05:19] Kyoko
    Oh, you know.
[05:20] Nozomi
    All right, let's keep moving.
[05:32] Nozomi
    Looks like more of them.
[05:38] Nozomi
    Hime, you can shoot these guys, right?
[05:40] Hime
    Yeah.
[05:54] Nozomi
    Kyoko, magic!
[05:55] Kyoko
    I know.
[05:57] ---
    
[06:01] Nozomi
    Kyoko, where's that magic?
[06:03] Kyoko
    Just hang on. Let me see...
[06:10] Suu
    Let me handle this one.
[06:11] Nozomi
    We don't need another dance!
[06:15] Suu
    
[06:26] Nozomi
    Hang on... What was that?
[06:29] Suu
    A sutra in the language of the gods.
[06:33] Nozomi
    Aren't you a dancer?
[06:35] Nozomi
    I'm a priestess.
[06:37] Kyoko
    For what god?
[06:38] Suu
    I'm not sure...
[06:41] Nozomi
    Only one silver?
[06:43] Hime
    There are two more. Here.
[06:46] Hime
    Wow...
[06:50] Nozomi
    There's really no one down here, huh?
[06:52] Nozomi
    We should be pretty far down by now...
[06:55] Hime
    I wouldn't want to see
    anyone looking like this!
[06:58] Nozomi
    It's just like being at the pool.
[06:59] Nozomi
    Outside of that,
     you'd be a pervert, though.
[07:03] Hime
    I wish I had your outfit, Kyoko-chan.
[07:05] Kyoko
    The cape?
[07:07] Kyoko
    You just didn't think that through when
    we chose our jobs in the beginning.
[07:10] Hime
    Well, the mage's incantations
    seemed kinda hard.
[07:14] Hime
    I figured a bow was
     something I could handle.
[07:16] Nozomi
    Nah, it's not that hard.
[07:19] Nozomi
    Kyoko can barely use her magic, either.
[07:21] Kyoko
    I beat that troll earlier, didn't I?
[07:24] Nozomi
    What's wrong?
[07:26] Hime
    I stepped in something.
[07:36] Nozomi
    What is this stuff?!
[07:48] Suu
    Oh, no... I feel...
[07:50] Nozomi
    Kyoko! Use your magic to do something!
[07:56] Kyoko
    Let's see...
[07:57] Nozomi
    Hurry it up!
[08:00] Kyoko
    I think you're fine, actually.
[08:02] Nozomi
    How is this fine?!
[08:03] Kyoko
    Well, it doesn't look like
    it'll eat you or anything.
[08:05] Hime
    It won't?
[08:06] Nozomi
    Who cares?! Just do something!
[08:09] Kyoko
    There's nothing to worry about.
[08:11] Kyoko
    It'll just do sexy things to you
    and put you in sexy positions for a while.
[08:16] Nozomi
    Hurry up and save us!
[08:17] Hime
    My armor...
[08:18] Nozomi
    It's melting!
[08:20] Hime
    Kyo-chan, please!
[08:22] Kyoko
    But if I use stuff like fire or ice,
     it'll hit you guys, too.
[08:27] Kyoko
    What can I do?
[08:29] Suu
    How about salt water?
[08:31] Suu
    If this is a giant amoeba,
    the osmotic pressure should...
[08:34] Kyoko
    That sounds pretty scientific,
    but I guess I'll try.
[08:37] Kyoko
    One sec.
[08:40] Hime
    Hurry! Hurry!
[08:42] Nozomi
    Who said you could touch in there?!
[08:43] Suu
    I can't...
[08:45] Hime
    Stop!
[08:52] Kyoko
    There, that should do it.
[08:55] Kyoko
    Here goes.
[08:57] Kyoko
    Piassa, selassa, regomar!
[09:00] Kyoko
    Splash and soak!
[09:18] Kyoko
    Well, that's a pretty sexy sight.
[09:20] Hime
    I'm so embarrassed...
[09:22] Nozomi
    I'm not gonna forget this!
SIGN    Personnel Only!!
[09:28] Nozomi
    All right, time to fight the final boss!
SIGN    Personnel Only!!
[09:32] Kyoko
    That seems kinda lazy.
[09:34] Nozomi
    It's fine. Let's go.
[09:38] Nozomi
    'Scuse us...
[09:44] Manami
    I'm impressed you made it this far.
[09:52] Manami
    I am the queen of this labyrinth.
[10:00] Nozomi
    That's way too damn fitting.
[10:02] Kyoko
    The "queen" in which sense?
[10:03] Hime
    Which sense?
[10:05] Kyoko
    That kind of queen?
[10:06] All
    That kind?
[10:07] Manami
    Quiet!
[10:08] Manami
    Now, listen!
[10:10] Manami
    Mere combat skills and magic
    won't be enough to defeat me.
[10:15] Manami
    You have to figure out the queen's secret,
[10:18] Manami
    or you can't conquer the labyrinth.
[10:25] Manami
    If you give the wrong answer,
[10:28] Manami
    you'll be trapped here
    for the rest of your lives!
[10:35] Kyoko
    Is your secret...
[10:38] Kyoko
    that you pad your chest?
[10:47] Manami
    H-How did you...?
[10:49] Both
    Please. That's obvious.
[10:52] Nozomi
    Hey! Hold up!
[11:05] Nozomi
    Oh, crap!
[11:06] Kyoko
    Run!
[11:08] Suu
    Wait for me!
[11:18] Kyoko
    You just wrote this
    as an inside joke, didn't you?
[11:20] Akechi
    Huh?
[11:21] Akechi
    Does it seem that way?
[11:23] Suu
    I like adventure stories, personally.
[11:25] Hime
    Me, too.
[11:27] Kyoko
    I could point out a lot
    of problems with it, though.
[11:30] Nozomi
    For one thing, what good
    is bikini armor gonna do?
[11:39] Akechi
    Good point...
[11:42] [SONG] Title
    We Tried Making a Fantasy
    Story in RPG Style.
[11:42] Kyoko
    Hey, what are you looking at?
SIGN    Fierce Fights! Arm Wrestling! How Will the Battle of the Heroines End?
SIGN    Inukai | Katsura | Shima | Naraku | Aiko | Sassu-Sassu | Hime | Higashitetsu | Akechi
SIGN    Mitama | Omaki | Sato | Kogata | Shimoike | Kojima | Kohina | Gokuraku (Nozomi) | Gokuraku (Akira)
[12:09] Hime
    Um... What's everyone doing?
[12:13] Katsura
    Ah, the favorite is here.
[12:23] Kyoko
    Okay, here we go.
[12:25] Kyoko
    Ready...
[12:27] Kyoko
    Begin!
[12:30] Omaki
    Sorry, but I build these muscles every day.
[12:34] Omaki
    I won't lose to someone
    who's not even in a club!
[12:39] Kyoko
    And the class president wins.
[12:42] Omaki
    Man, that hurt...
[12:44] Omaki
    How are you so strong?
[12:49] Manami
    I build muscles in a
    different way every day.
[12:55] Omaki
    I get it.
[12:58] Kyoko
    Okay, next.
[13:00] Kyoko
    Remember, no cheating.
SIGN    Inukai Katsura
[13:11] Nozomi
    Arm wrestling is about
    reading your opponent.
[13:13] Nozomi
    Watch her closely.
[13:15] Suu
    Okay, I will.
[13:21] Suu
    Watch her closely...
[13:25] Aiko
    Oh, man, she's staring at me...
[13:29] Suu
    Stare...
[13:35] Shimoike
    Are you ready?
[13:37] Shimoike
    Hakkeyoi!
[13:38] Shimoike
    Nokotta!
[13:48] Shimoike
    Aiko-chan wins.
[13:56] Suu
    I lost.
[13:58] Nozomi
    Jeez...
[13:59] Katsura
    You're up next, Hime.
[14:01] Hime
    Right...
SIGN    Aiko Sassu-Sassu
[14:08] Hime
    Why is everyone taking this so seriously?
[14:13] Shimoike
    Okay, grab hands.
[14:15] Katsura
    I bet it'll be Princess.
[14:17] Omaki
    Fuku-chan's tough, too.
[14:19] Omaki
    She's one of the top five
     in the prefecture in shot put.
[14:24] Fuku
    Her hands are bigger than I thought...
[14:27] Shimoike
    Are you ready?
[14:28] Shimoike
    Hakkeyoi!
[14:31] Shimoike
    Nokotta!
[14:39] Someone
    Check out Hime.
    She's got the strength of a gorilla.
[14:47] Fuku
    There!
[14:52] Hime
    Aw, I lost!
[14:57] Hime
    Huh?
[14:58] Shimoike
    That one didn't count.
[15:00] Fuku
    Come on! Take this seriously!
[15:02] Hime
    But I am...
[15:04] Katsura
    If Hime loses, we'll all take turns
    verifying whether or not her breasts are real.
[15:11] Hime
    Verifying?
[15:12] Katsura
    I mean directly of course, little lady!
[15:17] Hime
    What? But they are real!
[15:20] Shimoike
    Okay, let's start again.
[15:22] Shimoike
    Ready?
[15:24] Shimoike
    Hakkeyoi!
[15:26] Shimoike
    Nokotta!
[15:29] Shimoike
    Princess wins!
[15:30] Hime
    Are you okay?
[15:32] Fuku
    I lost... After all that training...
[15:36] Fuku
    A promise is a promise.
[15:38] Fuku
    Do as you will.
[15:40] Hime
    You don't have to take your clothes off!
[15:43] Katsura
    You weren't part of the bet.
[15:45] Fuku
    Oh...
[15:46] Hime
    Jeez...
[15:49] Kyoko
    You were supposed to be a match for me?
     You're so weak.
[15:53] Shima
    So are... you!
[15:59] Nozomi
    You know, Akira... You have good reflexes,
[16:03] Nozomi
    but you have no muscle strength at all.
[16:05] Nozomi
    You should at least help
    your mom out sometimes.
[16:07] Akira
    Shut up, you savage!
[16:10] Nozomi
    Hup!
[16:14] Katsura
    The kendo club member lost!
[16:16] Fuku
    And the tea club member won!
SIGN    Shimoike Kojima
SIGN    Hime Higashitetsu
SIGN    Sato Kogata
[16:29] Kyoko
    Whew, I'm tired.
[16:31] Hime
    So why are we arm wrestling, anyway?
[16:35] Katsura
    Come on, Princess! You're up next!
[16:38] Nozomi
    Go get 'em.
SIGN    Hime Higashitetsu
[16:45] Nozomi
    Hi-yah!
[16:47] Katsura
    Nozomi-chan wins!
[16:49] Nozomi
    Yes!
[16:53] Shimoike
    I lost.
[16:54] Shimoike
    But you two look the same,
    so I guess it's okay.
[16:57] Akira
    This is dumb. Who cares about
    contests of strength?
SIGN    Gokuraku (Nozomi) Gokuraku (Akira)
SIGN    Inukai
SIGN    Hime
SIGN    Mitama
SIGN    Gokuraku (Nozomi)
[17:14] Akechi
    Okay, we've got our best four!
[17:17] Akechi
    That's my Michi!
[17:19] Kyoko
    No favoritism allowed.
[17:22] Manami
    I've known you for many years,
[17:25] Manami
    but it seems the time has
    come to settle the score.
[17:28] Nozomi
    You always get so serious
    when it comes to contests.
[17:33] Inukai
    Got anything?
[17:35] Hime
    Why are we arm wrestling?
[17:41] Sato
    I'm surprised no one's left
     from any of the athletic teams.
[17:45] Omaki
    Well, Hime and Nozomi
     are involved with local dojos.
[17:50] Katsura
    No false starting, okay?
[17:52] Katsura
    Ready...
[17:56] Katsura
    Go!
[18:06] Manami
    For a game, you're taking
    this pretty seriously.
[18:10] Nozomi
    Well, I love competition, too.
[18:36] Katsura
    The winner is Mitama!
[18:39] Nozomi
    For real?
[18:41] Nozomi
    Also, you take this way too seriously.
[18:44] Manami
    We build up our bodies in different ways.
[18:47] Kojima
    So child-raising beats karate, huh?
[18:50] Kyoko
    Nothing's stronger than a mother,
     as they say.
[18:52] Kyoko
    She's not a mother, though.
[18:54] Shimoike
    Okay, Inukaicchi and Princess are next.
[18:57] Hime
    Oh... Right.
[19:03] Inukai
    I'm sure it won't even be a contest.
[19:06] Hime
    You think so?
[19:09] Omaki
    I know about Princess,
[19:11] Omaki
    but how is Inukai so strong?
[19:14] Katsura
    Well, she's tall, and she was
    into sports in middle school.
[19:19] Akechi
    Actually, it's love.
[19:22] Omaki
    Love?
[19:24] Omaki
    You're not gonna say it's because
[19:25] Omaki
    you guys get cozy ekiben
    style every day, are you?
[19:31] Katsura
    Ekiben? Like, selling train station
    bento boxes in train cars part-time?
[19:34] Akechi
    Good guess!
[19:36] Akechi
    And you're so dirty.
[19:38] Omaki
    You just have a dirty mind.
[19:42] Inukai
    Don't believe her.
[19:45] Shimoike
    Ready?
[19:47] Shimoike
    Hakkeyoi!
[19:48] Shimoike
    Nokotta!
[19:51] Shimoike
    Princess wins.
[19:53] Inukai
    You really are strong.
[19:55] Hime
    A-Are you okay?
[19:58] Omaki
    Your love lost.
[20:00] Akechi
    Maybe I didn't go about it the right way...
[20:03] Omaki
    Take it too far and you'll just look dumb.
[20:14] Shimoike
    Time for the final round!
SIGN    Final Round
[20:19] Manami
    Need a break?
[20:21] Hime
    I'm totally fine.
[20:23] Hime
    Anyway, why are we arm wrestling?
[20:26] Manami
    Just so you know, I won't lose,
    even if it is just a game.
[20:30] Hime
    Tama-chan, you sound kind of scary.
[20:33] Shimoike
    Are you both ready?
[20:36] Shimoike
    Hakkeyoi!
[20:37] Shimoike
    Nokotta!
[21:16] Nozomi
    I guess no one can beat Hime.
[21:18] Kyoko
    I guess.
[21:20] Hime
    Tama-chan, are you okay?
[21:25] Manami
    I feel like my little sisters lost.
[21:29] Hime
    Well, but you know...
    I carry Shino-chan around a lot, too.
[21:33] Hime
    I think she weighs three times
    as much as the Chi-chans.
[21:41] Manami
    Now I have an idea of how much you weigh.
[21:44] Hime
    D-Don't tell anyone!
     I mean that, Tama-chan!
[21:48] Hime
    Okay?!
[21:50] Hime
    You can't tell anyone!
SIGN    Hime
SIGN    Mitama
SIGN    Winner
    Heroine
SIGN    Hime, of course!!
SIGN    Winner
    Heroine
SIGN    Hime, of course!!
[21:54] Hime
    Also, why were we arm wrestling?
SIGN    Thank You For Watching!!