# Virtual-san Looking
A TV anime featuring 30 VTubers including Mirai Akari, Siro, Nekomiya Hinata, Tsukino Mito, Tanaka Hime, and Suzuki Hina! In a creative collaboration Anno Hideaki, the six primary cast members will appear in Evangelion costumes. The theme song is composed by producer Nakata Yasutaka, sung by Kizuna Ai in the first six episodes, before being taken over for episodes seven through twelve by the main cast as the special VTuber unit dubbed "Virtual Real".
An original 3DCG animated project with an omnibus format designed to put the personality and charm of VTubers on full display.
# Season 1
# E1 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GY2422V9R/untitled)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Uma**
This is Virtual Town.
**[00:04] Uma**
I'm Uma.
**[00:06] Uma**
A humanoid horse.
**[00:07] Uma**
Or maybe an equine human?
**[00:08] Uma**
Either way, I'm a horse that talks a lot.
**[00:11] Uma**
In this virtual world, there are
lots of special people like me.
**[00:15] Uma**
For example, there's a
peanut that talks a lot,
**[00:17] Uma**
a guy who pretends to be a beautiful girl,
**[00:19] Uma**
and this dude who's always
shooting off missiles.
**[00:20] Uma**
Grandmas, gorillas, raccoon dog
ninjas, Hello **** and a st****—
**[00:24] Uma**
Actually, I had better leave it at
that, before we get in trouble.
**[00:28] Uma**
Yep!
**[00:30] Uma**
And right now, passing in
front of us, is Mirai Akari.
***SIGN*** Mirai Akari
**[00:34] Uma**
She's a sexy, upbeat older girl who's
constantly sexually harassing her juniors.
**[00:38] Akari**
Puberty, yeah!
**[00:41] Uma**
This is Cyber Girl Siro.
***SIGN*** Cyber Girl Siro
**[00:43] Uma**
She is *not* the crazy psychopathic
combat AI, Siro Iruka.
**[00:47] Uma**
An intensely cute, classy idol.
**[00:50] Siro**
Oh boy, fresh prey!
**[00:54] Narration**
The girl with the strange walk is the
red half of HIMEHINA, Tanaka Hime.
***SIGN*** Tanaka Hime
**[00:58] Narration**
A chortling girl who never stops talking.
**[01:00] Hime**
Time for the rumbly crab shuffle!
**[01:05] Uma**
On her tail is the girl with the
slightly sexy exposed midriff...
***SIGN*** Suzuki Hina
**[01:09] Uma**
The blue half of HIMEHINA, Suzuki Hina.
**[01:12] Hina**
Hime! You're flashing your panties!
Cover that up!
**[01:14] ---**
There's broadcast standards!
**[01:16] Hinata**
Ow...
**[01:17] Uma**
The one who just fell right now is
the low-energy tomboy, Nekomiya Hinata.
***SIGN*** Nekomiya Hinata
**[01:21] Uma**
She has first rate skill at shooters,
but her tank top is super loose.
**[01:26] Hinata**
That really hurt... but I've
got video games waiting for me.
**[01:31] Uma**
Last up is the class president
with long, black hair, Tsukino Mito.
***SIGN*** Tsukino Mito
**[01:34] Uma**
She often tries to show her
superiority to all of Virtual Town,
**[01:38] Uma**
but unfortunately, she's a total small fry.
**[01:39] Mito**
Now, everyone, you mustn't run like that.
**[01:41] Mito**
You must elegantly walk like I do,
with your knees knocked. Like this!
**[01:47] Uma**
Looks like it's going to be another
fun day in the virtual world today!
**[01:51] Uma**
Yep!
**[01:56] Akari**
Okay girls, gather around!
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[01:58] Akari**
Meeting time!
**[01:59] Akari**
We've got a meeting!
**[02:00] Hinata**
A meeting?
**[02:02] Hime**
What kind of meeting?
Where we show off our underwear?
**[02:04] Akari**
No, Tanaka!
**[02:05] Shiro**
I know! I bet it's a meeting where
Akari-chan shares her lust with all of us!
**[02:10] Hime**
That's great!
**[02:12] Akari & Hina**
Would that be great?
**[02:13] Mito**
It's true that in the virtual world I am
treated as the classiest of the classy,
**[02:16] Mito**
in respect for my overwhelming classiness,
**[02:19] Mito**
but if by interacting with
the incarnation of libido
**[02:21] ---**
that is Akari-san, I can develop more...
**[02:22] Mito**
Then I can hardly see how a love scene
or two wouldn't be worth the cost—
**[02:25] Hime**
It's true that in the virtual world,
I am treated as the leggiest of the leggy,
**[02:28] ---**
in respect for my overwhelming legginess,
**[02:31] Hime**
so interacting with the incarnation of libido
that is Akari-san isn't the worst thing.
**[02:34] Shiro**
It's true that in the virtual world
I am treated as the queen of killers,
**[02:37] ---**
in respect for my overwhelming
skill at murder—
**[02:39] Akari**
Oh, never mind, then!
**[02:41] Akari**
Look, I get it, everybody,
but let's calm down.
**[02:43] Akari**
Because I actually have a huge announcement!
**[02:46] Akari**
It turns out that we're...
**[02:48] Shiro**
Oh, is this about the anime?
**[02:49] Hina**
Oh, I heard about that.
**[02:51] Hinata**
Akari-chan, you're lagging real bad.
**[02:52] Hime**
Seriously, we're already on the air.
See, the camera's over there, right?
**[02:55] Mito**
Hello, everyone! Are you watching?
**[02:56] Hina**
Hey, I think it's almost time!
**[02:58] Shiro**
Oh, already?
**[02:59] Shiro**
Gather around, gather around!
**[03:00] Hime**
Go, go!
**[03:01] Girls**
Okay, okay, okay!
**[03:02] Girls**
Hang on, hang on!
**[03:04] Shiro**
Okay, here we go!
**[03:05] Shiro**
Ready and...
**[03:07] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[04:52] Akari**
V-V-V-V...
**[04:54] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[05:08] Haruto**
It is a time of inter-galactic
war in the virtual world.
**[05:11] Haruto**
We will invade other virtual nations,
**[05:13] Haruto**
and in time, unify the galaxy...
**[05:14] Haruto**
Under our Game Club Empire!
**[05:17] Miria**
Shut it, Harutrash!
**[05:18] Miria**
Or do you want to go out the airlock?
**[05:19] Haruto**
Do you want me to kill you, pink fool?
**[05:21] Chief**
Okay you two, no fighting!
**[05:23] Ryo**
Chief, are we really going to try and
conquer the galaxy like Haru-kun says?
**[05:27] Chief**
Yep! We have to improve our ratings
in different virtual nations
**[05:30] ---**
so that we can rise to the top!
**[05:32] Ryo**
Wow, ratings still apply here?
**[05:33] Miria**
Hey Kaede-chan, I came up with a plan!
**[05:36] Chief**
Well, what is it? Tell me!
**[05:37] Miria**
I call it "The Titanic Game
Club Conquers the Galaxy!"
***SIGN*** The Titanic Game Club
Conquers the Galaxy
**[05:41] Ryo**
It's the direct approach where we become
titans who overwhelm our enemies, right?
**[05:45] Haruto**
I see you understand something, pink fool!
**[05:47] Haruto**
Power is everything!
**[05:48] Haruto**
With enough power,
your enemies will never outdo you!
**[05:51] Chief**
How do we become titans, though?
**[05:52] Miria**
I found out the other day!
**[05:54] Miria**
Apparently in space, if you bite your
own thumb, you can turn into a titan!
**[05:59] Haruto**
To think it was so simple!
**[06:01] Haruto**
Then let's begin!
**[06:04] Haruto**
I actually grew!
**[06:06] Chief**
I'll do it, too!
**[06:09] Ryo**
I wonder if it'll work for me!
**[06:11] Ryo**
I grew!
**[06:12] Miria**
You all did it!
**[06:14] Miria**
I had better go, too!
**[06:15] Voice**
*Congratulations to you.*
**[06:16] Miria**
Right, this is how it worked last time.
**[06:18] Chief**
Looks like we're all set to go.
**[06:20] Chief**
Time to invade some enemy nations!
**[06:22] Narration**
*Thank you for riding with us.*
**[06:22] Haruto**
What?!
**[06:23] Haruto**
Something's happening to my body...
**[06:25] Chief**
Huh? Why'd you all shrink?
**[06:27] Chief**
Is this treachery?!
**[06:28] Miria**
That's weird. I think it must be hereditary.
**[06:31] Miria**
You have good genetics, Kaede-chan!
**[06:33] Chief**
How could you all be so mean
and leave me like this?!
**[06:36] Miria**
Kaede-chan!
**[06:37] Voice**
*Congratulations to you.*
**[06:38] Ryo**
Miria-chan!
**[06:39] Haruto**
Pink fool!
**[06:41] Chief**
I don't want to be stuck like this!
I want to turn back!
**[06:45] Ryo**
Chief, wait a second—
**[06:46] Voice**
*Congratulations to you.*
**[06:48] Haruto**
Impossible... To obliterate
us after a mere two blows...
**[06:51] Haruto**
Ch-Chief, calm down for a second.
**[06:53] Chief**
They're all gone... You want to
be with them, don't you, Haruto?
**[06:56] Haruto**
S-Stop, please! Stay away, no!
**[06:59] Voice**
*Happy New Year.*
**[07:02] Chief**
Everybody's gone...
**[07:03] Chief**
The road to the Game Club's
conquest is still a long one.
**[07:13] All**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[07:17] Granny**
Ryugen Higo.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Ryugen
Higo
**[07:19] Granny**
It's a term for baseless rumors.
**[07:22] Granny**
It naturally refers to rumors that are
being spread that have no basis in reality.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[07:30] Granny**
In 1973, there was a toilet paper panic.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Ryugen Higo
**[07:35] Granny**
Because of the oil shock at the time,
**[07:37] ---**
the government announced there
would be paper rationing.
**[07:42] Granny**
And because of that, people started to
fear they would run out of toilet paper,
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[07:46] ---**
and as a result began
buying it up excessively.
**[07:51] Granny**
At the time, I...
**[07:54] ---**
had just turned twenty, I think.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[07:59] Granny**
You'd go to the bathroom in a department
store or use a public bathroom,
**[08:02] ---**
and there'd be no toilet paper!
**[08:05] Granny**
Can you imagine the kind of shock that'd be?
**[08:08] Granny**
If you went to a public restroom,
**[08:11] ---**
your only choice would be to
pray-per for paper! Get it?
***SIGN*** "Pray-per for Paper"
**[08:14] Granny**
Prayer for a square, if you would.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Ryugen Higo
**[08:27] Mito**
What is with you?! It's not like virtual-san
is looking all the time, y'know!
***SIGN*** This segment is called
Let's Go! To Class
**[08:35] Akari**
I wish spring vacation
would get here already.
**[08:40] Hime**
We just got done with winter vacation!
In a rush much?
**[08:43] Shiro**
But you always tend to wonder when the next
vacation is after you finish one, don't you?
**[08:48] Akari**
I know what you mean!
Even if you got plenty of rest!
**[08:51] Akari**
You still end up wondering
when the next one is.
**[08:54] Hinata**
It's so easy to start slacking
off during vacation, too.
**[08:57] Hina**
I'm pretty sure you're always
slacking off, Hinata-chan.
**[08:59] Hinata**
You're wrong, Hina-chan.
**[09:01] Hinata**
I'm just practicing for
video games in my head.
**[09:03] Mito**
Well, during vacation I continue
my proper, disciplined lifestyle,
**[09:07] ---**
so I never notice much of a change.
**[09:08] Hime**
The classy life?
**[09:10] Mito**
Precisely.
**[09:10] Shiro**
Ah, the sound of class.
**[09:12] Akari**
That's impressive! Erotic, even!
**[09:14] Mito**
I-Is it?
**[09:15] Mito**
I think it's quite normal.
**[09:19] Hinata**
What? What was that?
**[09:21] Akari**
What was that shaking?!
And is it suddenly hot—
**[09:25] Shiro**
Hey, look outside!
**[09:26] Shiro**
Is that a volcano?
**[09:27] Hinata**
It's so hot!
**[09:29] Hinata**
I hate the heat. Can't stand it...
**[09:33] Hime**
Why's there a volcano outside the classroom?!
**[09:35] Hime**
The heat's gonna kill us! We better evacuate!
**[09:38] Hina**
Where do we evacuate?
There's lava everywhere outside!
**[09:41] Hina**
If we leave the building, we're dead!
**[09:43] Akari**
What should we do?
**[09:46] Akari**
Huh? Class Prez?
**[09:48] Akari**
Do you realize what's going on?!
**[09:50] Mito**
This is nothing remarkable.
It's no different than every day life.
**[09:53] Hime**
Uh, no, it's not!
There usually aren't volcanoes!
**[09:55] Mito**
What are a few volcanoes?
**[09:57] Mito**
If you watch movies, there are
bound to be volcanoes showing up.
**[09:59] Hinata**
So hot! Dying!
**[10:01] Mito**
It's totally normal, if you
think of it as a sauna.
**[10:04] Hina**
The volcano's erupting!
**[10:05] Mito**
Well, of course a volcano would erupt!
**[10:07] Mito**
Honestly, you're all
making far too much fuss.
**[10:09] Mito**
Just think of this as our usual classroom.
**[10:12] Akari**
Okay. The usual classroom...
**[10:15] Akari**
Hello!
**[10:16] Akari**
Good morning!
**[10:16] Others**
Good morning!
**[10:18] Akari**
Let's do our best today again, okay?
**[10:21] Akari**
Okay, this isn't working!
**[10:23] Akari**
It's so hot! I'm gonna die!
**[10:24] Mito**
You can't even manage that, Akari-san?
**[10:26] Shiro**
Uh, hey... is that... magma headed this way?
**[10:30] Mito**
That's right, Siro-san, the volcano
exploded and the magma shot forth,
**[10:34] ---**
so that's only natural.
***SIGN*** I'm gonna bring the heat!
**[10:38] Hinata**
This is bad! If we don't do something...
**[10:41] Hinata**
It's gonna hit us! We'll be killed!
**[10:42] Mito**
Oh, be quiet!
**[10:43] Mito**
A volcano explodes, shooting magma about,
and it's headed right for us!
**[10:47] Mito**
Of course we'd die! It's totally normal!
**[10:48] Mito**
Wait, is it normal to die like that?
**[10:50] Mito**
N-No, it's not!
**[10:51] Mito**
No!
**[10:52] Peanut**
Here it comes!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[11:05] Granny**
Grandmother is watching.
**[11:10] Aoi**
One-two, one-two, one-two, one-two...
**[11:12] Gori**
Hello... Hello... Hello...
**[11:16] Aoi**
Gori-chan, you've got a
spring in your step today!
**[11:18] Gori**
Hello!
**[11:19] Aoi**
Something good happen?
**[11:20] Gori**
Hello.
**[11:21] Aoi**
Did you win a lottery?
**[11:22] Gori**
Hello...
**[11:23] Aoi**
Did the total at checkout
turn out to be 777 yen?
**[11:26] Gori**
Hello?
**[11:28] Aoi**
I know! You lost some weight, right?
**[11:30] Aoi**
You seem lighter!
**[11:31] Gori**
Yesterday, I was peeling a banana, right?
Since I'm on a diet.
**[11:36] Aoi**
Damn, Gori-chan, you're such a lady!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[11:40] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
**[11:42] Gori**
Hello.
**[11:43] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[11:49] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[11:53] Akari**
What is it, Hime?!
**[11:55] Hime**
Mirai-san! We've got really big trouble!
**[11:57] Akari**
What, what is it?!
**[11:58] Hime**
Someone with the pen name
"Takeru-kun" is in trouble!
**[12:01] Hime**
Here, read it already!
**[12:04] Akari**
"Akari-san, hello."
**[12:05] Akari**
Hello.
**[12:06] Akari**
"The other day, I had a
meeting with my friend,"
**[12:09] Akari**
"but I overslept and was an hour late,
and they were furious."
**[12:12] Akari**
"They haven't talked to me since.
What should I do?"
**[12:15] Hime**
Such a hot voice!
**[12:17] Hime**
But y'know, people get so mad when
you oversleep and miss stuff!
**[12:20] Akari**
You've got a point there.
**[12:22] Akari**
Maybe he should buy some snacks.
**[12:23] Hime**
Snacks?!
***SIGN*** Akari MEMO
When you oversleep, bring snacks
**[12:24] Hime**
A peace offering?
**[12:25] Akari**
But what kind of snacks should
it be, what would be best?
**[12:28] Hime**
Maybe bales of rice?
**[12:31] Akari**
I get it! Just one bale, maybe!
**[12:33] Hime**
Just one!
**[12:34] Akari**
But in your case, Takeru, maybe take two.
**[12:36] Hime**
Good point.
**[12:38] Akari**
I get it, though.
Takeru-kun wants to make amends.
**[12:41] Hime**
Yeah, he wants to patch things up.
**[12:42] Akari**
I wonder what'd be best, then?
**[12:45] Hime**
Mirai-san?
**[12:47] ---**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[12:49] Hikari**
Oh, come on, there's only one real answer!
**[12:53] Hikari**
Since it was his fault, he should apologize!
**[12:56] Yami**
Who cares?
**[12:58] Yami**
What are you getting so
worked up for, Hikari?
**[13:00] Hikari**
Oh, stop that! Be quiet!
**[13:03] Yami**
Just ignore them.
**[13:04] Hikari**
You can't!
**[13:05] Hikari**
Please, don't say things
that'll only make it worse!
**[13:10] Yami**
Look, just take him to bed.
**[13:12] Hikari**
You can't give up your body so freely!
**[13:14] Yami**
Whatever. You handle it, then, Akari.
**[13:16] Hikari**
You can do it, Akari!
**[13:17] Hime**
Hello? Hello?! Mirai-san!
**[13:23] Akari**
Sorry, I was thinking too hard there!
**[13:25] Hime**
Well, good morning.
**[13:26] Akari**
Okay, to pen name Takeru-kun!
Here's the bottom line.
**[13:30] Hime**
Is this it?! She's going
to show her bottom! Line?
**[13:33] Akari**
To make up for last time,
you set up another meeting,
**[13:36] Akari**
and then oversleep by an hour again!
**[13:39] Hime**
Instead of being on time?!
**[13:40] Akari**
And then, you suddenly grab your friend when
they're about to angrily leave, from behind!
**[13:43] Akari**
And be like, "I'm sorry, the sight of
you standing there was just so lovely,
**[13:46] ---**
I was totally fixated and couldn't move."
Something like that!
**[13:49] Hime**
That seems really romantic,
but isn't it a little bold?!
***SIGN*** Virtual Kabuki-cho
**[13:52] Hime**
Is that okay?!
**[13:53] Akari**
And then, after getting worked up,
**[13:55] Akari**
the two of them start ****ing and ****ing,
**[13:57] Akari**
before vanishing into the lights
of late night Kabuki-cho!
**[14:00] Hime**
How lewd!
**[14:01] Akari**
Ain't it though, Tanaka?
**[14:03] Hime**
But it said "friend"! What if it's
one of Takeru-kun's male friends?
**[14:11] Hime**
Well, that'll do for today!
See you next time!
**[14:14] Akari**
Come again! Take care!
**[14:16] Akari**
Next time, I'll actually serve
you something to drink!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[14:26] Hinata**
It's almost time for a pork bowl,
**[14:28] Hinata**
almost time for a pork bowl...
**[14:35] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[14:37] Hinata**
It's near the end of the game.
Four survivors, including me.
**[14:40] Hinata**
From the sound of gunfire, I'm sure there
are two enemies at 1 and 11 o'clock.
**[14:44] Hinata**
There's a field in the center
of the area with good visibility.
**[14:48] Hinata**
I can't find the other one, though.
**[14:50] Hinata**
Is he in that house?
**[14:52] Hinata**
If I waltz out into the field, I'm going
to come under fire from three directions
**[14:57] Hinata**
and that'll be the end.
**[14:59] Hinata**
What do I do?
**[15:00] Hinata**
I have to think up a way to win!
**[15:04] Hinata**
I have to...
**[15:07] Akari**
Hinata!
**[15:08] Hinata**
I win!
**[15:09] Akari**
What's wrong?
**[15:09] Hinata**
Wait, no, not that...
**[15:10] Akari**
You look really intense.
**[15:12] Hinata**
A-A pork bowl!
**[15:13] Hinata**
I wanted to go get a pork bowl.
**[15:16] Akari**
Oh, I see.
**[15:17] Akari**
Well, they are yummy, right?
**[15:19] Akari**
See you!
**[15:21] Hinata**
See you... yeah.
**[15:24] Hinata**
Pork bowls are best for lunch.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[15:29] Kerin**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[15:31] Kerin**
Blow them away!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[15:38] Shiro**
Oh, it's Tsukino Mito-chan! Welcome!
**[15:41] Mito**
I am so fed up!
**[15:43] Mito**
Can I get some trivia on chocolate?
**[15:45] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[15:51] Shiro**
Chocolate!
**[15:52] Shiro**
They say that Columbus was the first
European to encounter chocolate.
**[15:57] Shiro**
But at the time chocolate
was just a bitter drink,
**[16:00] Shiro**
so he apparently had very
little interest in it!
**[16:02] Shiro**
Chocolate's also supposed to have
various positive health effects,
**[16:04] Shiro**
with a woman who was 122 before
passing away saying she would
**[16:09] ---**
eat 900 grams of chocolate a week.
**[16:12] Shiro**
One other thing, if you eat
chocolate and gum together,
**[16:14] Shiro**
the cocoa butter will melt the gum,
**[16:17] Shiro**
so it's generally recommended that
you don't have them together.
**[16:22] Mito**
Wow, is that true?
**[16:24] Mito**
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-san.
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Tsurumaki Kazuya
**[16:32] Lala**
My name is Mikurira Lala.
**[16:34] Lala**
My favorite foods are uncooked
ham and strawberries.
**[16:37] Lala**
My talents are the vaulting
horse and singing.
**[16:41] Lala**
It's nice to meet you all!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[16:49] Mito**
Now, I wonder who it's going to be today?
**[16:55] Mito**
You're Kenmochi Rikiya-san, right?
**[16:56] Sword**
It's Toya!
**[16:57] Mito**
Sorry, the kanji were so
similar that I got mixed up.
**[17:00] Toya**
Class Prez, what is this?
Why did you lock me in here?
**[17:02] Mito**
Silence, Kenmochi-san!
Let's get down to business.
**[17:05] Mito**
We're now going to begin the
ultimate decision committee.
**[17:08] Mito**
I wish you the best of luck in
choosing the correct answer.
**[17:10] Toya**
How bossy can you get?
**[17:12] Mito**
Here is today's subject!
***SIGN*** Subject: which kind of on-air trouble would you choose, as a streamer?
***SIGN*** A) Your drunken mother interrupts a stream.
***SIGN*** B) The game you were streaming turns out to be BL.
**[17:22] Toya**
B actually happened to you before, didn't it?
**[17:24] Mito**
That's right. I thought it
was a simple typing game,
**[17:27] ---**
and then all of a sudden a very
explicit BL scene appeared.
**[17:30] Mito**
Now, with that in mind,
which would you prefer?
**[17:34] Toya**
Good question. I guess I'd pick A,
your drunken mother interrupts a stream.
**[17:38] Mito**
That one?
**[17:39] Mito**
The sort of thing that used to
happen regularly with live streams.
**[17:43] Toya**
Right, and sometimes it actually
made the stream more entertaining.
**[17:45] Mito**
That kind of thing could often go viral.
**[17:47] Toya**
Right.
**[17:48] Mito**
And your drunken mother wouldn't be
likely to get you banned by barging in.
**[17:52] Toya**
Right. Whereas with the BL game, if it's
explicit enough, you could get banned for it.
**[17:56] Mito**
Right.
**[17:57] Mito**
What could a mother do to get
you banned, do you think?
**[18:00] Toya**
Well, if she's drunk, she could
suddenly start stripping.
**[18:04] Mito**
Nobody wants to see that.
**[18:06] Mito**
Oh, well, that's the bell for 3 PM,
so it's time to announce the correct answer.
**[18:09] ---**
The correct answer is B), the game you
were streaming turns out to be BL!
**[18:14] Toya**
Was there any point in even
getting my opinion then?
**[18:16] Mito**
Shut up! That's how I went viral, y'know!
**[18:18] Mito**
What kinda streamer is worried
about getting banned, anyway?!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[18:23] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[18:26] Shiro**
Don't you look, Uma!
**[18:29] Sora**
There's no stopping now!
Virtual-san is looking!
**[18:34] Kohaku**
Hey, I'm Otori Kohaku, 17 years old.
**[18:39] Kohaku**
Everyone calls me Unity-chan.
**[18:43] Kohaku**
As to why... aw, man!
**[18:47] Kohaku**
Come on!
**[18:49] Kohaku**
Stay away!
**[18:51] Kohaku**
Not the bamboo spear! No, no, no!
**[18:56] Kohaku**
Aw, man!
**[18:59] Kohaku**
Huh?
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[19:02] Kohaku**
Did I just stream that?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[19:07] Hina**
Hey, Hime, are there really dark
elves in a cave like this?
**[19:12] Hime**
One of the villagers said he
saw one leaving this cave.
**[19:16] Hina**
Did you ask Villager B, too?
**[19:17] Hime**
B was walking into a wall,
so I left him alone.
**[19:21] Hina**
Well, it'd be dangerous if
they were so close to an town.
**[19:25] Hime**
Right, so we have to do something about it!
**[19:27] Hina**
Hime, wait!
**[19:29] Hina**
There it is!
**[19:30] Hime**
It's a Keblin!
**[19:32] Hina**
Dummy! It noticed us!
**[19:34] Hime**
This is bad!
***SIGN*** For various reasons, we will be
presenting this segment in still images.
Next week, look forward
to the full animated version.
**[19:36] Hina**
This is really bad!
**[19:38] Hina**
Ninnomono!
**[19:40] Hime**
That was amazing, Hina-chan!
**[19:41] Hime**
How'd you manage that?!
**[19:42] Hina**
It kinda felt like it'd work out!
**[19:44] Hina**
Look, there's another one!
**[19:46] Hime**
Okay...
**[19:47] Hime**
Nin! Nin!
**[19:48] Hina**
You suck!
**[19:50] Hime**
The Keblins are coming!
**[19:51] Hina**
Let go! Quit trying to take Hime's pants off!
**[19:57] Kerin**
What are you all doing?!
**[19:58] Both**
Th-That voice...
**[20:02] Kerin**
Time to blow it all up!
***SIGN*** See you next week!
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Ekaki Makuru
**[20:08] Cat**
It's me, your wife, Master, Ekaki Makuru.
**[20:13] Cat**
I want to use my Kamieshi
Power to care for you, Master.
**[20:20] Cat**
Just kidding!
**[20:23] Cat**
Bye-bye.
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:35] Uma**
Please, listen, Sister.
**[20:36] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[20:38] Uma**
There's this girl who I
want to tell how I feel—
**[20:39] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[20:41] Sister**
What is it?
**[20:45] Sora**
I did my laundry when there
was some tissue in my pocket,
**[20:47] Sora**
and my clothes ended up covered in it!
**[20:49] Sora**
What should I do, Sister?!
**[20:51] Sister**
At times like that, using the
dryer or some dry fabric softener
**[20:57] ---**
should make it easier to get the tissue off.
**[20:58] Sora**
Really?
**[21:00] Sister**
There's also the option
of using a lint roller,
**[21:03] Sister**
and on the odd side of things,
**[21:04] ---**
you can use the nets that produce
are sold in to pick it off.
**[21:07] Sister**
You can try any of those ways out.
**[21:09] Sora**
Okay! Thank you!
**[21:11] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[21:13] Uma**
Sister!
**[21:19] Gori**
It's an honor. This is
"Virtual-san is looking."
**[21:23] Mito**
Now, we've got a letter to look at.
**[21:25] Mito**
This is from pen name "Sleight of Hand,
Slight of Mouth." Thanks for writing.
**[21:28] Everyone**
Thank you!
**[21:31] Mito**
"Good evening, everyone. You're all incredibly
beautiful, and very popular online."
**[21:35] Mito**
"But who among you is the most
popular? Please tell me."
**[21:39] Hime**
Glad to hear I'm popular!
**[21:39] Mito**
Well everyone, who do you think it is?
**[21:43] Hime**
Popular... Who's most popular?
**[21:44] Shiro**
Well, whoever has the biggest fluffy
melon breads is usually the most popular!
**[21:46] Mito**
Oh, then who does that make number one?
**[21:48] Shiro**
Well, we'd have to compare to see.
**[21:51] Akari**
Okay everyone, step forward.
**[21:53] Shiro**
Everybody line up.
**[21:54] Hime**
Oh, no, don't look!
**[21:56] Akari**
Here we go, show them off!
**[21:58] Hime**
I'm young! I'm too young,
don't make me do this!
**[22:00] Hinata**
Have fun, you guys.
**[22:02] Mito**
So, that settles it.
**[22:05] Mito**
The most popular member among the
six of us is Cyber Girl Siro.
**[22:10] Shiro**
Wait, you were just guessing!
**[22:12] Mito**
I assure you that's not the case!
**[22:13] Mito**
And now the segment's over!
**[22:15] Hina**
Wait, guessing what?
**[22:17] Mito**
Anyway, that's it for this week!
See you next time on...
**[22:20] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:10] Hiyoko**
Good morning!
**[23:11] Hiyoko**
I'm the Virtual Youtuber who's getting
a second crack at life as a young girl,
***SIGN*** Mochi Hiyoko
**[23:14] ---**
Mochi Hiyoko.
**[23:15] Hiyoko**
I'm sure you've all thought about
wanting to be a little girl before.
**[23:19] Hiyoko**
Well, there's a medicine that can make
that dream come true... right here!
**[23:21] Hiyoko**
It's a magical medicine that can turn
you into a little girl right away!
**[23:25] Hiyoko**
I bet everyone would be happy
if we were all little girls!
**[23:28] Hiyoko**
Everybody, be a little girl!
***SIGN*** Next Time:
"The Legendary Secret Medicine... Oh, I Feel Hot!"
***SIGN*** Next week, virtual-san will still be looking!
# E3 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYME20J86/untitled)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] Hime**
Yeah!
**[00:00] Mito**
Wow, impressive!
**[00:00] Mito**
Right!
**[00:03] Peanut**
When a cat is swinging
their tail up and down,
**[00:05] Peanut**
it's means they want some affection.
**[00:06] Uma**
Okay, okay, okay, can I get
some affection, too, then?
**[00:08] Peanut**
Get over here, you goofy horse!
**[00:10] Uma**
Okie dokie!
**[00:13] Shiro**
What's wrong, Mito-Mito?
You seem really exhausted.
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[00:17] Mito**
I haven't been getting enough sleep lately.
**[00:19] Hinata**
I get you. It's easy to lose track of
time when you're playing video games.
**[00:22] Mito**
Not that, Hinata-san! I was
actually practicing something.
**[00:25] Hina**
Practicing something? Well, what
is it? Now I'm really curious!
**[00:27] Mito**
Well, you see...
**[00:29] Mito**
It's a pose to do during
the show's title call.
**[00:31] Hime**
Wait, what? What are you talking about?
**[00:32] Akari**
What kind of pose is it?
**[00:34] Mito**
It's a bit something like...
**[00:35] Mito**
This!
**[00:37] Akari**
What the heck?
**[00:39] Hime**
It's absolutely perfect! Let's use it!
**[00:41] Mito**
Understood!
**[00:43] Mito**
All right, let's do it together!
**[00:44] Mito**
Ready and...
**[00:45] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:33] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[02:47] Ryo**
Haru-kun, you're not allowed to
cook up any more weird drugs.
**[02:49] Haruto**
R-Right. Forgive me.
**[02:51] Miria**
Did something happen?
**[02:53] Haruto**
Oh, no...
**[02:53] Kaede**
Everyone, gather around!
**[02:55] Kaede**
We need to start getting serious
about our galactic conquest!
**[02:58] Kaede**
Anyone have any good suggestions?
**[02:59] Ryo**
About that, Chief...
**[03:01] Ryo**
While I was repairing our ship, I was able
to accidentally invent an incredible switch!
**[03:05] Kaede**
What's it do?
**[03:06] Ryo**
It's a switch that can freeze
it's targets in time!
**[03:09] Haruto**
What?!
**[03:10] Haruto**
Of all the myriad powers that exist,
time manipulation may be the strongest!
**[03:16] Haruto**
Well done, Ryo!
**[03:18] Miria**
Harutrash shut up for once! Awesome!
**[03:20] Kaede**
If we use this on our enemies, we can freeze
them in place and invade their territory!
**[03:24] Miria**
Let me try it!
**[03:26] Miria**
I wanna mess with Harutrash!
**[03:27] Ryo**
Pipe down, Miria-chan.
**[03:29] Miria**
Ryo-kun?
**[03:31] Kaede**
Is... something wrong, Ryo-kun?
**[03:33] Ryo**
I've been thinking this for a while now...
**[03:35] Ryo**
Everyone else in the Game Club is too random!
**[03:37] Ryo**
I'm the only one thinking seriously
about galactic conquest!
**[03:41] Kaede**
Calm down, Ryo-kun!
**[03:42] Ryo**
You understand what I mean, don't you, Chief?
**[03:44] Kaede**
I do! So just... calm down.
**[03:46] ---**
And get time moving again for
Miria-chan and Haruto-kun.
**[03:49] Kaede**
Okay, Ryo-kun?
**[03:50] Ryo**
Why would you say that?
**[03:52] Ryo**
Are you uncomfortable, being alone with me?
**[03:54] Kaede**
Ryo-kun, don't!
**[03:56] Ryo**
It's time that I teach you, Chief,
**[03:57] ---**
that this switch's power is enough to grant
someone control over the entire world!
**[04:02] Kaede**
No—!
**[04:04] Ryo**
And now I'm the only one left in the world!
I've taken control of time!
**[04:10] Ryo**
What? Can you see me?
**[04:12] Ryo**
I asked if you could see me!
**[04:16] Ryo**
Of all things, Haru-kun has invaded
my world of stopped time...
**[04:23] Haruto**
Good grief.
**[04:25] Haruto**
Now I've got the switch!
**[04:27] Ryo**
Wryyy—
**[04:30] Haruto**
Now I just need to release them.
**[04:32] Haruto**
Pink fool, Chief... I'm about to save you!
**[04:36] Haruto**
Click!
**[04:41] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[04:49] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[04:53] Grandma**
Senpen Banka.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase
Senpen Banka
**[04:57] Banner**
It means "constantly changing."
**[04:59] Banner**
It refers to how things can progress
rapidly with the passage of time.
**[05:03] Banner**
Convenience stores are a good example of
something that has evolved wildly over time.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:09] Grandma**
The first one in Japan was built in 1974,
in the Toyosu ward of Tokyo.
**[05:17] Grandma**
The first thing I bought at one was
cup ramen, and it was quite the surprise.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:26] Grandma**
I was genuinely amazed by how good
it tasted the first time I had some!
**[05:31] Grandma**
In the old days, it was fashionable
to eat it while standing around!
**[05:35] Grandma**
Everyone would be in Ginza,
standing around, eating cup ramen.
**[05:40] Grandma**
You were Inzagay, eating amenray.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:44] Grandma**
Not ushisay.
**[05:47] Grandma**
But rather upcay amenray.
**[05:50] Grandma**
I was abbergastedflay,
it was such a urprisesay!
***SIGN*** That being the case, otay ebay ontinuedcay!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[06:05] Chaco**
My name is Chaco!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Chaco
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[06:07] Chaco**
My favorite food is chocolate.
**[06:08] Chaco**
Which is why my name is Chaco!
**[06:11] Chaco**
I'm going to work hard, so I can
become famous like the other Vtubers!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[06:20] Mito**
I guess Virtual-san is looking.
**[06:27] Grandma**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[06:33] Gori**
Aoi-san!
**[06:35] Aoi**
Hey, it's Gori-chan!
**[06:36] Gori**
Sorry to startle you.
**[06:38] Aoi**
That is... a lot of gorillas.
**[06:39] Aoi**
Whatcha doing?
**[06:40] Gori**
Picking up girls.
**[06:42] Aoi**
Picking up girls? How?
**[06:44] Gori**
Aoi-san, would you like to go pick
up banana shakes in Harajuku?
**[06:47] Aoi**
Nope.
**[06:48] Gori**
Aoi-san, would you like to get your
banana fortune read in Harajuku?
**[06:50] Aoi**
Nope.
**[06:51] Gori**
Aoi-san...
**[06:57] Aoi**
Let's go! I'll take take the lead.
**[06:59] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:01] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:04] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[07:09] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[07:14] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[07:16] Hime**
Mirai-san! We've got really big trouble!
***SIGN*** They're moving so erratically, the camera is having trouble keeping up
**[07:18] Akari**
What, what is it?
**[07:20] Akari**
Scuttle, scuttle!
**[07:21] Hime**
Someone using the pen name
"Kinokohead-kun" is in trouble!
**[07:24] Hime**
That's enough waddling around, here, read it!
**[07:27] Akari**
Okay, sorry.
**[07:28] Akari**
Let's see... "Akari-chan,
hello." Hello there!
**[07:30] Hime**
Hello.
**[07:32] Akari**
"There's a music group that I support
that have a concert coming up."
**[07:34] Akari**
"And I was able to secure tickets,
**[07:36] ---**
but it turns out it's the same day
as our baseball club's next game."
**[07:39] Akari**
"There's no telling what my Senpai might do
to me if I don't show up for the game."
**[07:42] Akari**
"Is there any way I can resolve this
peacefully and still go to the concert?"
***SIGN*** Problem: The baseball club's game and a concert at the same time
**[07:47] Hime**
Oh, I can see how he'd want to go!
**[07:50] Hime**
You'd totally want to go the show!
**[07:51] Akari**
I know! But he really cares about
the baseball club, too, right?
**[07:55] Hime**
Yeah, he's a good kid!
**[07:56] Akari**
He is!
**[07:57] Hime**
Have you ever had two different
things fall on the same date?
**[07:59] Hime**
Yeah!
**[07:59] Hime**
I have, I totally have!
**[08:00] Akari**
Go ahead!
**[08:02] Hime**
Well, sometimes Youtubers or Vtubers would
stream at the same time as I was doing one!
**[08:08] Akari**
Oh, I see, while you were streaming yourself!
**[08:11] Hime**
Right, right, right!
**[08:11] Akari**
That totally happens!
**[08:12] Hime**
And I wanna watch, so, so bad!
**[08:13] Akari**
I get you, I mean, you can always
watch it once it's archived...
**[08:18] Akari**
But then you can't make comments!
**[08:19] Hime**
Exactly!
**[08:20] Akari**
True enough...
**[08:21] Hime**
I wanna see it with my own eyes, in real-time!
**[08:23] Akari**
So what did you end up doing?
**[08:25] Hime**
Watch the archive!
**[08:28] Akari**
Aw, look at you! Such a good girl!
**[08:30] Hime**
Yes! I'm a good girl!
**[08:32] Akari**
But y'know, I'm sure Kinokohead-kun
is hoping for a way to peacefully
**[08:35] ---**
skip the game and head to the concert...
**[08:40] Hime**
Good point!
**[08:42] Hime**
Mirai-san? Hey, Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[08:46] Yami**
Senpai, take my big bat...
**[08:47] Hikari**
I'm not letting you finish that!
**[08:48] Yami**
I applaud your speedy response.
**[08:50] Hikari**
You can do this, Akari!
**[08:52] Hime**
Hello? Earth to Mirai-san!
**[08:56] Akari**
Sorry, sorry,
**[08:57] Akari**
Well, pen name Kinokohead-kun,
I'm gonna get to the bottom line.
**[09:02] Hime**
Is this it?! She's going
to show her bottom! Line?
**[09:06] Akari**
First, you wait for the manager of
this artist you like, at their office!
**[09:10] Hime**
The manager?
**[09:11] Akari**
Right! And then you hook up with the manager!
**[09:13] Hime**
What if it's another guy?
**[09:15] Akari**
You hook up with him.
**[09:16] Hime**
Wow, how versatile!
**[09:17] Akari**
And then, you seduce the manager!
**[09:19] Hime**
Every bit as lewd as I figured!
**[09:21] Akari**
Then, after seducing the manager,
you seduce your baseball club's coach!
**[09:24] Hime**
A world of adult relations!
**[09:26] Akari**
Then, on the day of the big game,
**[09:28] Akari**
you invite the artist, and have
the concert right before the game!
**[09:32] Hime**
Hey, that really does cover all the bases!
**[09:34] Hime**
I've got the perfect thing, then!
Instead of glow sticks,
**[09:37] Hime**
everybody swings bats around!
**[09:38] Hikari**
You nailed it!
**[09:39] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go buy eight bats
to stick between my fingers, then!
**[09:43] Akari**
Wow, you can handle that kind of weight
on your fingers?! Talk about buff!
**[09:46] Akari**
You must be shredded, Tanaka!
**[09:47] Hime**
Here I go!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[09:55] Hinata**
Huh, was this big empty lot always here?
**[09:59] Hinata**
I can feel the Gianism!
**[10:05] Hinata**
Wait, this is bad...
**[10:06] Hinata**
In a space like this, with no cover,
and no hiding spots,
**[10:09] Hinata**
if I came in with a blaster,
it's low splat coverage
**[10:11] ---**
and lack of mobility will make
it hard to secure any territory.
**[10:16] Hinata**
Should I spam "Come on!"
to call for reinforcements?
**[10:19] Hinata**
Wait, hang on there! Those pipes are here.
**[10:22] Hinata**
If I can lure an enemy behind them,
when they've let
**[10:24] ---**
their guard down behind the cover, I can
nail them with the blaster's splash damage!
**[10:29] Hinata**
Boom!
**[10:30] Hinata**
This might work!
**[10:31] Hinata**
All right! Booyah!
**[10:36] Hinata**
Maybe I ought to practice with the
blaster every once in a while.
**[10:39] Hinata**
Bang!
**[10:40] Hinata**
Bang!
**[10:42] Hinata**
It's always awesome to see those explosions!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[10:48] Sora**
You all are so helpless.
**[10:52] Sora**
Oh, well.
**[10:54] Sora**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[11:01] Shiro**
Oh, it's Hime-chan, Hina-chan! Welcome!
**[11:04] Mime**
We are so fed up!
**[11:07] Hina**
Can we get some trivia about rabbits, please?
**[11:10] Hime**
Yeah, give it to us!
**[11:11] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[11:16] Shiro**
Oh, rabbits!
**[11:19] Shiro**
They're often considered an icon
of people who hate being alone,
**[11:21] Shiro**
and there's no shortage of girls
who've said something like,
**[11:24] ---**
"I'm like a bunny.
I'll die if I'm left alone."
**[11:27] Shiro**
And when you see individuals on their own,
compared to the ones that live in groups,
**[11:30] ---**
they seem a bit lonely.
**[11:32] Shiro**
But apparently, living in colonies makes them
anxious, and they love being on their own!
**[11:38] Shiro**
If anything, we need to be careful
about cramming more than one into the
**[11:42] ---**
same cage just because we
imagine them to be lonely.
**[11:46] Shiro**
Incidentally, the Guinness World Record
for the largest rabbit in the world
**[11:50] Shiro**
was 1 meter and 32 cm long!
**[11:54] Hime**
Wow, really?
**[11:56] Hina**
Your trivia really is
always handy, Siro-chan!
**[11:59] Hime**
Sure is!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Villager 2
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[12:08] Villager**
The whole world finding out
about your preferences!
**[12:13] Villager**
That's what this corner boils down to.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[12:22] Mito**
I wonder who's visiting today?
**[12:29] Alice**
Hello! Class Prez!
**[12:31] Mito**
Oh, I see Mononobe Alice
is my guest this week.
**[12:33] Alice**
I get to have afterschool
tea time with the Class Prez!
**[12:36] Mito**
You're coming dangerously close to
trademark infringement, Alice-chan!
**[12:38] Mito**
Let's walk that back!
**[12:39] Alice**
Okay!
**[12:40] Mito**
A tea party, eh?
Well, you're not exactly wrong.
**[12:45] Mito**
Today let's make it an ultimate
decision committee/tea party!
**[12:47] Today's Topic**
Here is today's topic.
**[12:49] ---**
Which would you prefer to
be served at a tea party?
**[12:52] A**
Noni juice.
**[12:53] B**
Senburicha.
**[12:54] Alice**
Senburicha... that's a Japanese tea, yes?
**[12:57] Mito**
Seems like it, right?
**[12:58] Alice**
And noni juice is juice, not tea!
**[13:00] Mito**
You are correct.
**[13:01] Alice**
I had something called aojiru for a
segment once, and it was surprisingly good!
**[13:06] Mito**
That was supposed to be a penalty for you,
**[13:08] Mito**
and when you said it was surprisingly good,
you sabotaged the point of you drinking it!
**[13:12] Mito**
You're supposed to give a big
reaction about how bad it tastes!
**[13:15] Alice**
I guess so! Sorry!
**[13:16] Mito**
But that honesty is part of what
people love about you, Alice-chan.
**[13:19] Alice**
Thank you!
**[13:20] Mito**
I honestly haven't had noni
juice before, myself...
**[13:22] Alice**
Oh, I have!
**[13:25] Mito**
You have?
**[13:26] Alice**
It had kind of a stingy taste.
**[13:29] Mito**
That doesn't sound good after all.
**[13:31] Mito**
But they do say that the worse things taste,
the better they are for you.
**[13:34] Mito**
Granted, that's a bit of folk wisdom.
**[13:36] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[13:37] Mito**
Alice-chan, since we have both here today,
why don't we drink them to decide?
**[13:42] Mito**
I'll go with the noni juice.
**[13:43] Alice**
Then I'll go with B, the Japanese senburicha!
**[13:47] Mito**
All right, here we go!
**[13:48] Mito**
Ready and...
**[13:50] Mito**
What the...
**[13:52] Alice**
This is better than I thought!
**[13:53] Mito**
Hey... reactions are supposed to be...
**[13:55] Mito**
As a streamer...
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[14:01] Shiro**
Virtual-san is watching!
**[14:04] Shiro**
Smash, smash, smash!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[14:07] Unity**
Unity-chan...
**[14:10] Gori**
* It's an honor. This is*
* Virtual-san is looking.*
**[14:13] Mito**
*Now, we've got a letter to look at.*
**[14:15] Unity**
Wait. If this show is on...
**[14:19] Unity**
Today's...
**[14:20] ---**
Wednesday?!
**[14:24] Unity**
Oh, crap, I forgot my report!
**[14:28] Unity**
Why does this happen?!
**[14:30] Unity**
How does it keep happening?! Man...
**[14:34] Unity**
Ow.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[14:38] Lily**
A good lily afternoon to everyone!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Amatsuka Liliel
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[14:41] Lily**
I'm the angel, Amatsuka Liliel!
**[14:44] Lily**
I'm training in the human world
to become an archangel some day!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer
**[14:55] Elu**
Hold it right there.
**[14:56] Everybody**
Who are you?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[15:00] Kerin**
Elu-san, is that you?
**[15:03] Hina**
Elu-san? You mean the legendary, beautiful
god elf known throughout the land,
**[15:07] Hina**
Elu-san the Elf?!
**[15:09] Hime**
Yeah but I'm pretty sure
she didn't look like that!
**[15:12] Hime**
She looks kinda pale!
**[15:13] Hime**
And with really dry skin!
**[15:15] Kerin**
There's a story behind it all.
**[15:16] Hina**
There is?
**[15:18] Kerin**
Fine, then. Since you guys are here,
you might as well take a seat.
**[15:20] Hime**
Okay, then...
**[15:21] Hime**
Down we go...
**[15:21] Kerin**
You too, Keblin.
**[15:24] Kerin**
See, Elu-san is an elf girl who
came here from another the world.
**[15:28] Hime**
Yeah, I know!
**[15:29] Hime**
She's even in the wiki.
**[15:32] Kerin**
But one day, there was this big disaster.
**[15:34] Hina**
Disaster?
**[15:35] Kerin**
It was burned down! Her homeland, the forest.
**[15:39] Kerin**
*The forest... forest...*
**[15:43] Hina**
It was a real tragedy.
**[15:44] Hime**
You know about it, Hina?
**[15:46] Hina**
No, I just wanted to say that.
**[15:50] Hina**
Continue the story.
**[15:52] Kerin**
Elu-san rushed back to the forest,
but it was already too late.
**[15:56] Kerin**
The entire place had been scorched,
with her kin burnt to death.
**[15:58] Hime**
Oh no... that's terrible.
**[16:00] Kerin**
She was so wrought with grape sor...
**[16:02] Kerin**
She was so fought with... grave...
**[16:07] Kerin**
She was so fraught with great sorrow,
Elu-san used all of her life energy
**[16:11] Kerin**
to cast a spell to revive the forest.
**[16:14] Hina**
I know that spell!
**[16:16] Hina**
It's Return-the-Forest-Spirit-Head, right?
**[16:17] Kerin**
No!
**[16:19] Kerin**
The forest was restored, but Elu-san
paid the price, and was turned to stone.
**[16:25] Hime**
What a sad story.
**[16:27] Kerin**
Yeah. And ever since I heard about it,
**[16:30] ---**
I've been studying magic to restore her,
here in the forests of Gunma.
**[16:35] Hina**
Sorry we barged in here without knowing.
**[16:38] Kerin**
The timing actually works out.
I actually just finished the spell.
**[16:42] Hime**
Wow, convenient!
**[16:45] Kerin**
Forests, earth, birds!
**[16:47] Kerin**
Let your life force fuel my magic circle,
and release Elu-san from her petrification!
**[16:53] Kerin**
Elu Dorado!
***SIGN*** Elu-san—!
**[17:00] Gori**
Hello.
**[17:05] Gori**
Hello.
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[17:16] Uma**
I hope this works today.
**[17:18] Uma**
Hear me out, Sister.
**[17:19] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[17:20] Uma**
There's a girl who I
really want to tell how—
**[17:22] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[17:27] Sister**
What is it?
**[17:28] Sora**
I wanted to make breakfast for a friend,
but all I could make was a mushy fried egg!
**[17:33] Sora**
I just know they hate me now!
**[17:35] Sister**
You have nothing to worry about.
**[17:38] Sister**
Cooking is all about love and sincerity.
**[17:40] Sister**
As long as your feelings were conveyed,
the appearance doesn't matter.
**[17:43] Sora**
That's a relief.
**[17:45] Sister**
And even if it's mushy, two pieces of bread
can make it into a lovely egg sandwich.
**[17:51] Sora**
I get it!
**[17:52] Sora**
Okay, tomorrow, I'm gonna pull this off!
**[17:56] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[17:58] Uma**
An egg sandwich sounds delicious!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:05] Aoi**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[18:06] Aoi**
So look, look, look at this!
**[18:10] Hina**
Okay, I've got a letter right here!
**[18:13] Hina**
From pen name "The Pen Is
Virtual Division the Sword-san."
**[18:17] Hina**
Thanks for writing in!
**[18:17] Girls**
Thank you!
**[18:21] Hina**
Let's see, "I've always loved hip hop."
**[18:24] Hina**
"And I was curious if
you all listened to it."
**[18:26] Hina**
"If you don't mind, I'd like to
hear you all do freestyle raps."
**[18:29] Hina**
So it says!
***SIGN*** Letter: Let's hear some
freestyle raps
**[18:30] Hinata**
This is bad!
**[18:32] Mito**
I can't possibly do something like this,
not in sudden death mode.
**[18:35] Hina**
If you're virtual Youtubers,
surely you can rap a bit?
**[18:41] Hina**
Everybody ready?
**[18:42] Hinata**
No!
**[18:45] Mito**
Uh, what? Who are you supposed
to be? What is this?
**[18:48] Mito**
It's an earthquake!
**[18:49] Shiro**
What the heck?
**[18:50] Mito**
A heartbeat?
**[18:50] Hina**
It's beatboxing...
**[18:51] Hime**
Oh, that's it!
**[18:53] Hina**
Hina's going first!
**[18:55] Hime**
Yeah!
**[18:55] Hina**
Gonna drop a beat on them with a virtual rap!
**[18:58] All**
Yeah!
**[18:59] Mito**
Wow, she's actually got it down!
**[19:01] Hina**
Woo! Uh... don't stop the backbeat, please.
**[19:03] Girls**
Oh, okay.
**[19:05] Hina**
What's up with winter,
who you supposed to be?
**[19:07] Hina**
Winter, for you, hot water for stew!
**[19:09] Hina**
Hey! Yo! Check it out!
**[19:11] Hina**
Next up!
**[19:13] Shiro**
I'm the girl up next after Hina!
**[19:15] Shiro**
Gonna break a beat, so let's-a go!
**[19:17] Shiro**
It's winter, I've been here, no fear!
**[19:23] Hinata**
To all the boys and girls on the streets
**[19:25] Hinata**
Styling to the beats!
**[19:26] Hinata**
Independent, born to rend it,
if there's bad we better end it!
**[19:29] Hinata**
The young kids born into a paper society!
**[19:32] Hinata**
But we're not gonna split
or take the demerit!
**[19:36] Hinata**
We've got work steady, ready,
like a turtle in an eddy! Yeah!
**[19:39] Hime**
Turtle in a what?!
**[19:40] Hime**
Turtles?
**[19:41] Hinata**
Next up, next up, next up, next up!
**[19:44] Hime**
The rowdy girl named Tanaka Hime!
**[19:46] Hime**
Someone said turtle and
I don't know what to say!
**[19:49] Hime**
If a turtle crawls under your table,
**[19:51] Hime**
and lifts it up is it port-able?
**[19:53] Hime**
Yo! Next up is Akari-chan!
**[20:00] Akari**
You know what's sexy? Turtles!
**[20:03] Mito**
Damn it!
**[20:04] Mito**
Damn it...!
**[20:09] Akari**
You know what's sexy? Turtles!
**[20:11] Akari**
And you know what turtles are? Sexy!
**[20:14] Mito**
Change the subject!
**[20:15] Mito**
Please, change the subject, Akari-san!
**[20:19] Akari**
This is hard, really hard,
and I'm bad, I admit!
**[20:22] Akari**
But if sexy is the subject, then I love it!
**[20:25] Akari**
Nothing's funner than sexy stuff, yo!
**[20:27] Akari**
Now, Mito-chan, say something sexy!
**[20:30] Mito**
I have to do a sexy rap now?!
**[20:32] Hinata**
Go, go, go...
**[20:34] Mito**
All right, here I go...
**[20:36] Mito**
This is it!
**[20:37] Mito**
I like citrus, so have a
happy Merry Christmas.
**[20:39] Mito**
I, uh...
**[20:40] Mito**
Speaking of snow, there's snowballs...
**[20:41] Mito**
Throw balls... a lot of... throwing...
**[20:46] Mito**
A whole lot!
**[20:46] Mito**
I'm really just throwing whatever out now.
**[20:49] Mito**
This isn't rap anymore.
**[20:50] Hime**
Any ideas?
**[20:51] Mito**
Right, rap, rap...
**[20:52] Mito**
Let's see...
**[20:54] Mito**
I'm good at throwing balls of snow.
**[20:56] Mito**
Show, flow, bow and arrow!
**[21:02] Mito**
Uh, and next... uh...
**[21:04] Mito**
Who hasn't gone yet?
**[21:05] Mito**
Did you go yet, Hina-san?
**[21:07] Girls**
That's it! That's everyone!
**[21:08] Mito**
Oh, is that everyone? We're done!
**[21:10] Akari**
Finish it up with something cool!
**[21:12] Mito**
Last one, last bun, last run...
**[21:15] Mito**
I won. Are we done? Can I stop?
**[21:18] Shiro**
Now that's what I call virtual Youtubers!
**[21:22] Mito**
It certainly is...
**[21:24] Hina**
And that wraps it up for this week!
**[21:27] Hina**
And so, until next week...
**[21:29] Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Rindo Mikoto
**[23:11] Rindo**
I'm the oni queen, Rindo Mikoto.
**[23:13] Rindo**
Now, you delightful children of man,
**[23:15] Rindo**
during the Setsubun holiday,
you like to shout,
**[23:18] ---**
"Oni get out, fortune come in,"
and then throw beans at us, yes?
**[23:21] Rindo**
But even oni can hurt,
and not just physically.
**[23:24] Rindo**
You also shouldn't waste food.
**[23:27] Rindo**
Which is why I always make a point
to catch it all in my mouth.
**[23:30] Rindo**
Next time is "Erupt!
Maximum Magic, Buchitova."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"Erupt! Maximum Magic, Buchitova."
**[23:33] Rindo**
Virtual-san will still be looking next week.
# E4 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRG57X38R/untitled)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
They say that cucumbers are supposed to
have the fewest calories of all fruits.
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey! Then what about carrots?
**[00:08] Peanut**
I'm talking about cucumbers
right now, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:18] Shiro**
Four sixty-six! Four sixty-seven!
Really working up a sweat!
**[00:22] Hinata**
Let's all pull off a sweet
muscle pose today! Here we go!
**[00:28] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:16] Kaede**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:30] Ryo**
I'm sorry about the other day.
**[02:32] Miria**
No more inventing weird stuff, Ryo-kun.
**[02:36] Haruto**
Listen, people, have you seen the chief?
**[02:39] Miria**
Kaede-chan?
**[02:40] Miria**
She picked up a weird life reading outside
the ship and wanted to check on it.
**[02:45] Kaede**
Ow, ow, ow, ow...
**[02:47] Ryo**
Chief? What's wrong?
**[02:50] Kaede**
I found some strange life form
**[02:51] Kaede**
where I couldn't tell if it was
alive or dead, and it bit me...
**[02:54] Haruto**
You're hurt, chief?
**[02:56] Haruto**
You should get it treated!
**[02:58] Kaede**
But it's not that big a wound,
I'm sure it's...
**[03:03] Miria**
Kaede-chan?
**[03:05] Ryo**
Chief?
**[03:06] Haruto**
What the?!
**[03:07] Haruto**
Hey!
**[03:08] Haruto**
Ch-chief!
**[03:12] Miria**
Kaede-chan! No!
**[03:14] Miria**
The neck is...
**[03:17] Haruto**
The chief is eating the pink fool!
**[03:21] Miria**
Harutrash...
**[03:25] Haruto**
Ryo! We need to retreat!
**[03:26] ---**
The chief and the pink fool
are acting strange!
**[03:29] Kaede**
Ryo-kun...
**[03:31] Ryo**
Haru-kun, help me!
**[03:33] Ryo**
Chief, stay away!
**[03:35] Ryo**
No! I said stop...
**[03:38] Haruto**
Damn it!
**[03:40] Haruto**
It's a pandemic.
**[03:42] Haruto**
One that might wipe out the game club!
**[03:45] Miria**
Harutrash!
***SIGN*** Chomp
***SIGN*** Game Club
***SIGN*** Zombie Club
***SIGN*** Zombie Club
**[03:57] Kaede**
Now we're all zombies, huh?
**[04:00] Miria**
Surprising how much consciousness
we still have.
**[04:03] Ryo**
Seriously.
**[04:06] Haruto**
If anything, doesn't becoming
undead make us unstoppable?
**[04:10] Ryo**
True.
**[04:12] Kaede**
You all look great.
**[04:17] Kaede**
Keep that camera rolling!
**[04:20] Ryo**
The chief is trying to
cash in on that movie.
**[04:23] Miria**
I wanna do the Thriller dance with all of you!
**[04:27] Haruto**
Good idea, pink fool.
**[04:33] Kaede**
Okay, let's invade enemy
territory while dancing!
**[04:38] All**
Hoo!
**[04:42] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[04:54] Grandma**
Sunpo Nankou.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Sunpo Nankou
**[04:58] Grandma**
That's the phrase.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:00] Grandma**
It refers to times when you have trouble
crossing even the smallest distance.
**[05:05] Grandma**
"Having trouble crossing" might be a
bit melodramatic, but in the old days,
**[05:10] ---**
transportation wasn't as easy as it is now.
**[05:12] Grandma**
Depending on the time, there would
be detours because of road work,
**[05:16] Grandma**
and all kinds of construction, and holes
in the road as a result, everywhere.
**[05:22] Grandma**
But when it comes to walking,
the thing that shocked me the most
**[05:26] ---**
when I moved to Tokyo in 1964,
were women in high heels.
**[05:31] Grandma**
The roads were in better shape than
they were in the country, to be sure,
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:35] Grandma**
but in my home, Niigata, heavy duty
construction hadn't started yet,
**[05:40] ---**
making it hard to get anywhere.
**[05:42] Grandma**
So when I moved to Tokyo with that mindset,
and saw women in high heels,
**[05:48] ---**
I could only think,
"How can they walk like that?"
**[05:51] Grandma**
That said, your Virtual Grandmother can
freely travel, no matter how old she gets.
**[05:59] Grandma**
Just like this!
**[06:06] Grandma**
I can get great air, too, in fact.
**[06:08] Grandma**
Three, two, one, blast off!
**[06:13] Grandma**
Fly, Sachiko!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:26] Hime**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[06:35] Hinata**
Man, I thought we were done for!
**[06:38] Hinata**
It sure is great to be alive!
**[06:40] Hina**
Hey, hey, did any of you see that special
feature on animals that was on TV yesterday?
**[06:45] Akari**
I totally did! The chimpanzee
segment was so cute!
**[06:49] Shiro**
I liked the one on kitties!
**[06:53] Hina**
I think I liked the penguins best!
**[06:55] Hina**
I know, why don't we all
go to the zoo some day?
**[06:58] Everyone**
Sounds good!
**[07:05] Hinata**
That scared me! What was that shaking?
**[07:10] Hime**
Hang on...
**[07:12] Hime**
Isn't it really quiet?
**[07:14] Hime**
I don't hear a single thing from outside!
**[07:17] Shiro**
You're right! No wind
from the outside, either!
**[07:21] Mito**
Could it be...?
**[07:23] Mito**
Everyone, are we at—?!
**[07:27] Everyone**
The bottom of the sea!
**[07:29] Shiro**
Why would we be at the bottom of the sea?!
**[07:32] Hime**
But if you think about it, we've got air,
and the classroom's power is still on.
**[07:36] Hime**
I don't think we need to panic.
**[07:38] Hime**
Things will probably go
back to normal in a while.
**[07:41] Mito**
Good point! Let's just wait for the
classroom to return to normal, then.
**[07:46] Shiro**
Still, I didn't know it
was like this down here.
**[07:49] Shiro**
You can't dive this far down,
so it's kind of interesting.
**[07:54] Akari**
Hey, a penguin!
**[07:56] Hina**
A penguin?! Where, where, where?!
**[07:59] Hina**
Hey, you're right! So cute!
**[08:03] Hinata**
It's cute, but...
**[08:05] Hinata**
Deep sea penguins sure are huge, huh?
**[08:09] Mito**
Uh... I think... it's way too big!
**[08:14] Hime**
It's opening its beak!
**[08:16] Peanut**
Here I come!
**[08:19] Akari**
You again?!
**[08:22] Hime**
Hina, you love penguins!
Do something about this! Quick!
**[08:27] Hina**
I don't like my penguins this big!
**[08:31] Hina**
It's gonna eat us!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[08:43] Hina**
Thank you for calling.
This is "Virtual-san is looking."
**[08:50] Aoi**
That'll do it.
**[08:52] Aoi**
When Gori-chan goes for that banana,
I'll pull the string, and I'll catch him.
**[08:56] Aoi**
This'll be great!
**[08:59] Gori**
Yo, yo, my name is Gorilla!
**[09:02] Gori**
When it comes to the jungle,
there's no one iller!
**[09:03] Gori**
Solid gold content with no filler!
**[09:05] Gori**
Gonna open to door to another thriller!
**[09:12] Gori**
Hello.
**[09:13] Aoi**
So he can shrink and grow at will.
**[09:14] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[09:16] Gori**
Hello.
**[09:19] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[09:25] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[09:30] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[09:32] Hime**
Someone with the pen-name
"Yumirin-chan" is in trouble!
**[09:35] Hime**
Here, read this!
**[09:37] Akari**
Let's take a look.
**[09:39] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello.
**[09:40] Hime**
H'lo.
**[09:42] Akari**
"I'm thinking about quitting my job."
**[09:45] Akari**
Wow, really?
**[09:46] Akari**
"My bosses treat me bad, I have to work a ton
of overtime, and every day is really hard."
**[09:49] Hime**
Oh, wow...
**[09:50] Akari**
"But I feel like quitting would be
like giving up. What should I do?"
**[09:53] Hime**
Man, this is serious!
***SIGN*** Problem: Whether or not to quit your job
***SIGN***
**[09:58] Akari**
What should she do?
**[09:59] Hime**
Yeah, good question...
**[10:01] Hime**
Mirai-san?
**[10:02] Hime**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[10:05] Hikari**
I think she should quit.
**[10:07] Hikari**
If she stresses herself until she's sick,
it'd defeat the point of having a job, right?
**[10:10] Yami**
But just quitting is dull.
**[10:12] Yami**
Let's get some revenge.
**[10:14] Hikari**
Revenge?!
**[10:14] Yami**
Sneak a secret photo into a desk.
**[10:17] Hikari**
I've heard about this before.
**[10:18] Yami**
Or have Chono-san slap somebody.
**[10:20] Hikari**
Oh, I know this show!
**[10:22] Yami**
The rest... I leave to you, Akari.
**[10:25] Yami**
Seeya.
**[10:26] Hikari**
Take it from here, Akari!
**[10:28] Hime**
Hello?
**[10:29] Hime**
Hello!
**[10:30] Hime**
Mirai-san?!
**[10:32] Akari**
Sorry, I was in a world of my own!
**[10:35] Hime**
Good morning.
**[10:36] Akari**
Okay, pen-name Yumirin-chan,
I'll get to the bottom line!
**[10:41] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
**[10:45] Akari**
You should get a new job at a company
that supports a matchmaking app!
**[10:49] Hime**
A new job?
**[10:51] Akari**
Then you should find a girl
that your old boss would like!
**[10:54] Hime**
What for?!
**[10:56] Akari**
Then you hire a detective!
**[10:59] Hime**
But why? Why?!
**[11:00] Akari**
You have the detective shadow them,
after matching the boss and the girl.
**[11:05] Akari**
Then you have the detective
take pictures of them together,
**[11:09] ---**
and send some scandalous pictures
to your old boss's family!
**[11:13] Hime**
That's scary!
**[11:15] Akari**
That way you can get a new
job and get revenge, too!
**[11:19] Hime**
Akari-chan, you're a genius!
**[11:21] Akari**
I sure am!
**[11:22] Hime**
Wow!
**[11:23] Hime**
But y'know, if you make that
match, and they get together,
**[11:26] Hime**
wouldn't he be really glad about
finding a cute young girl?
**[11:30] Akari**
True.
**[11:31] Akari**
If that happens, then you call up Chono-san.
**[11:35] Hime**
Got it!
**[11:36] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go grab him, then!
**[11:39] Akari**
Uh, wait a sec, Tanaka...
**[11:40] Akari**
That's not the first step!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:47] Hinata**
This lot is pretty big.
**[11:52] Hinata**
Up we go.
**[11:57] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[11:59] Hinata**
This place is surrounded by buildings.
**[12:02] Hinata**
If I was surrounded by people in the building
behind me, along with the ones in front,
**[12:05] Hinata**
on top of enemies blocking
the street, what would I do?
**[12:10] Hinata**
I mustn't run away.
**[12:11] Hinata**
I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away,
I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away!
**[12:15] Hinata**
No matter how tough the situation,
I will find a way to survive!
**[12:18] Hinata**
Now I wanna play some video games, though.
**[12:23] Hinata**
Okay, I'll skip school and head home.
**[12:28] Akari**
Hinata...
**[12:29] Hinata**
Whoa, Akari-cha! What are you doing there?!
**[12:30] Akari**
You shouldn't play hooky.
**[12:33] Akari**
This pipe is my territory!
**[12:35] Hinata**
What?! You think I can't splat over it?!
**[12:39] Akari**
Come on, off to school.
**[12:41] Hinata**
Hang on!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[12:50] Hinata**
Yay! Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:58] Shiro**
Oh, it's Aoi-chan! Welcome!
**[13:02] Aoi**
I am so fed up!
**[13:04] Aoi**
Can I get some trivia about candy, please?
**[13:06] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[13:12] Shiro**
Ah, candy...
***SIGN*** "Candy"
**[13:16] Shiro**
Y'know, there's a candy that was invented
in Germany for the dental health of kids!
**[13:22] Shiro**
In 1920, Germany had fewer foods
that required heavy duty chewing,
**[13:28] Shiro**
which was causing a lot of children
to develop dental problems.
**[13:30] Shiro**
And so, something was created in order
to force children to chew harder
**[13:34] ---**
in order to prevent dental problems: gummies!
**[13:38] ---**
The name comes from the
German word for rubber.
**[13:41] ---**
By the way, if you give
someone gummies on white day,
**[13:44] ---**
it carries the message of, "I don't
like you," so keep that in mind!
**[13:52] Aoi**
Wow, really? Your trivia really
is always handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Special Announcement
***SIGN*** The Sudden Appearance of a City
***SIGN*** Overflowing with crowds
***SIGN*** Giant Growth
***SIGN*** Transformation
***SIGN*** The secrets of the opening are about to be revealed!?
***SIGN*** Coming Soon!!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[14:21] Mito**
I've got a bad feeling about this.
**[14:23] Mito**
Like I shouldn't open this door.
**[14:29] Mito**
Shut up! Mugi-chan, calm down!
**[14:31] Mito**
Keep that decibel level down!
**[14:32] Mugi**
Well, I was scared on my own,
**[14:34] Mugi**
and when the door suddenly opened,
I was scared!
**[14:36] Mito**
I guess I scared you, and I'm sorry.
**[14:38] Mito**
But this is the ultimate decision committee,
**[14:40] Mito**
so are you ready to to go?
**[14:42] Mugi**
Yes!
**[14:42] Mito**
Here is today's subject.
**[14:44] Mito**
If you could only eat one thing,
would it be a) meat or b) grass?
**[14:48] Mugi**
Grass was something you ate before, right?
**[14:51] Mito**
When I was in elementary school, I had
a a bit too much curiosity, so yes,
**[14:54] Mito**
but I have it under control now, thank you.
**[14:56] Mito**
So, which is it, Mugi-chan?
**[14:57] Mugi**
I think I'd pick meat.
**[15:01] Mugi**
I want to live a long time,
and did you know this?
**[15:04] Mito**
Yes?
**[15:05] Mugi**
Setouchi Jakucho-san eats 800 grams of meat
a day, and she's ninety-five years old!
**[15:11] Mito**
True enough, she's living proof.
**[15:13] Mugi**
Yep, that's right!
**[15:14] Mito**
But Mugi-chan, you've never
eaten grass before, right?
**[15:17] Mugi**
Well, that's true.
**[15:19] Mito**
It's important to try new things!
**[15:21] Mito**
You shut-ins are just a little
too set in your ways, I suppose.
**[15:25] Mugi**
I am not!
**[15:26] Mito**
That's the bell for 3 PM!
**[15:27] Mito**
Well, I honestly wasn't sure at first
this time, but ultimately it has to be B!
**[15:31] Mugi**
But grass doesn't taste good!
**[15:34] Mito**
You want to eat some meat?
**[15:35] Mugi**
I wanna eat meat!
**[15:36] Mito**
You do realize everyone's
onto those crocodile tears?
**[15:39] Mugi**
But everyone is so nice to me when I do it!
**[15:41] Mito**
Why, you little...
**[15:42] Mito**
Well, I recommend you all try
eating the grass around your home!
**[15:45] Mito**
It'll open a whole new world for you!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[15:51] Rin**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:54] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[15:57] Unity**
Hi, everybody, it's Ootori Kohaku!
**[15:59] Unity**
Today I've got something good to show you!
**[16:02] Unity**
This is a big warehouse that my
papa gave me that's on the wharf,
**[16:05] Unity**
and it's where I hang out!
**[16:07] Unity**
It's got a bunch of stuff I've collected!
**[16:10] Unity**
Like this thing, and that thing...
**[16:13] Unity**
And this here, and I like this one!
**[16:14] Unity**
Then there's this! Oof!
**[16:19] Unity**
Impressive, right?
**[16:22] Unity**
And yet, somehow...
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Ruruno Ruru
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Saotome Miko
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Suzuki Miyano
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Nadasaki Tooru
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Sanpi
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Kishi Tsurone
***SIGN*** Pen Name: High Neck Wolf
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Shinonome Kizuna
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Vortex
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Maron
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[16:46] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[16:51] Gori**
Hello.
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:56] Kerin**
Why?!
**[16:58] Hime**
It's a gorilla! So cute!
**[17:00] Gori**
Hello.
**[17:00] Hina**
So Elu-san's a gorilla now?
**[17:03] Kerin**
Don't be ridiculous.
**[17:04] Kerin**
She... My Elu-san...
**[17:06] Kerin**
She'd never be so hairy!
**[17:08] Gori**
Good elfning!
**[17:09] Gori**
I'm here from the land of elves!
I'm the high-minded elven beauty, Elu!
**[17:14] Gori**
Hello!
***SIGN*** Cut that out!
**[17:16] Kerin**
Keblins, get this gorilla scum out of here!
**[17:21] Gori**
What are you doing?! I haven't
had enough screen time!
**[17:23] Hime**
Wait!
**[17:24] Hime**
Let poor Gori say something!
**[17:26] Kerin**
What is it, gorilla?
**[17:30] Gori**
The thing about bananas is...
**[17:31] Gori**
People think they grow on trees, right?
But they're actually grass.
***SIGN*** This is grass
**[17:35] Gori**
And did you know that they're
not fruits, but vegetables?
**[17:43] Hime & Hina**
Get that liar out of here!
**[17:44] Gori**
Hello!
**[17:46] Kerin**
Damn it! I can't believe that
nuisance got in the way.
**[17:49] Kerin**
I was gonna save Elu-san,
**[17:51] Kerin**
make her fall for me,
**[17:53] Kerin**
destroy the world,
**[17:54] Kerin**
and create a paradise for the two
of us, and now the plan's ruined!
**[17:57] Hime**
So you were up to no good
after all, you goofy goober!
**[18:02] Kerin**
You are the one who's a goofy goober!
**[18:04] Kerin**
Go forth, Keblins!
**[18:05] Hina**
Hao!
**[18:07] Hime**
Hao Hao!
**[18:09] Hime**
There's no end to them!
**[18:11] Hime**
Hina, look out!
**[18:14] Hina**
S-Stop it! My bellybutton...
Don't play with it!
**[18:18] Kerin**
You two are done for! I'll blow you both up!
**[18:21] Hime**
This is bad!
**[18:22] Kerin**
Super Maximum Magic, Buchitoga!
**[18:28] Hina**
Hime, this is bad! That's the high
level version of Buchitova, Buchitoga!
**[18:32] Hime**
Boy, that naming convention sounds familiar!
**[18:35] Hime**
What do we do?!
**[18:37] Hina**
I didn't want to use this, but...
**[18:40] Hina**
Time for the maximum
defensive magic, Gorillaga!
**[18:47] Gori**
Hello!
**[18:48] Gori**
Hello.
**[18:50] Kerin**
Damn it! This stupid gorilla
keeps getting in my way!
**[18:55] Kerin**
This isn't over!
**[19:00] Hina**
He was really tough.
**[19:02] Hime**
Yeah!
**[19:03] Hime**
Hey, Hina-chan, want to
grab some banana shakes?
**[19:06] Hina**
Sounds nice!
**[19:07] Hina**
Y'know, bananas are vegetables!
**[19:10] Hime**
Hello! Bananas! Hello!
**[19:12] Hime**
So cute!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:22] Uma**
I hope you can finally hear
me out this time, Sister.
**[19:24] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:26] Uma**
There's this girl I want to—
**[19:27] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:33] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:35] Sora**
A friend of mine borrowed a book
and hasn't returned it yet!
**[19:37] Sora**
It's hard to ask for it back,
so what should I do?
**[19:41] Sister**
Why not tell them that another
friend wants to borrow it?
**[19:46] Sora**
I actually tried that, but they
just apologized and brushed it off.
**[19:51] Sister**
I would try writing a letter, then.
**[19:54] Sora**
Do you really think someone who'd
brush it off would even read it?
**[19:57] Sister**
Not for them, but for their parents.
**[20:00] Sora**
Going to the parents?!
**[20:01] Sister**
They will then speak to your friend.
**[20:04] Sister**
That should get them to pay
attention and return your book.
**[20:07] Sora**
Okay, I better go buy some stationery!
**[20:12] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:14] Uma**
I'm the one who borrowed it, Sister!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:20] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Virtual-san is looking! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
**[20:26] Everyone**
Okay, we've got a letter here.
**[20:29] Akari**
It's from pen name "Tom Is Pen"-san.
**[20:31] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:35] Akari**
"Lately, I can't stop playing video games."
**[20:37] Akari**
"Please talk about your favorite games..."
**[20:40] Akari**
"Without using any English words."
**[20:42] Mito**
Why?
***SIGN*** Theme:
Your Favorite
Video Games
***SIGN*** * No English Allowed
**[20:47] Akari**
Ready... start!
***SIGN*** Theme: Talk about your favorite
video games (no English allowed)
**[20:48] Hime**
Gong!
**[20:49] Hina**
Your favorite... g-ga—
**[20:51] Hime**
Games!
***SIGN*** Game
**[20:52] Mito**
Tanaka!
**[20:55] Akari**
Wait, hang on, I have to count every foul!
**[20:57] Hinata**
Wait, Akari, that's...
***SIGN*** Count
**[21:00] Akari**
This is really hard, guys! Give me a break!
**[21:03] Mito**
Well, I enjoy romance games.
**[21:05] Everyone**
Oh, romance games!
**[21:06] Mito**
The cool ones, especially.
**[21:08] Akari**
What kind of ty...
**[21:08] Hime**
The ones with stories!
**[21:10] Akari**
Uh, never mind, I mean wh-what kinda..
**[21:11] Someone**
Tai?
**[21:12] Akari**
What kind of... Thai?
**[21:13] Someone**
Thai!
**[21:14] Akari**
No!
**[21:16] Mito**
Akari!
**[21:17] Mito**
Don't try and narrow down the genre of game!
**[21:19] Hime**
Hey, Mito-chan said "game"! You said game!
***SIGN*** Game
**[21:22] Mito**
This is chaos!
**[21:24] Akari**
That does it for this week!
**[21:26] Akari**
And so, until next week...
**[21:29] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Roboko
**[23:09] Roboko**
Hello, robo! I'm the super
advanced robotic Vtuber, Roboko!
**[23:13] Roboko**
I'm sure you've all had your
glasses fog up before, right?
**[23:17] Roboko**
Like when you go indoors on a cold day,
**[23:20] Roboko**
when you're wearing a face mask,
**[23:21] Roboko**
or when you're drinking some hot coffee!
**[23:24] Roboko**
Wow, can you imagine how hard it'd be to see
if you drank hot coffee with a face mask on?
**[23:30] Roboko**
Wait, did somebody just call me junk?
***SIGN*** Next time is "One Cannot Live Without Loafing!"
***SIGN*** Next Time
"One Cannot Live Without Loafing!"
***SIGN*** And next week, Virtual-san will be looking again!
# E5 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6DKGZ38R/untitled)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
Y'know, the scientific name for
gorillas is *gorilla gorilla*!
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey! So what
about virtual gorillas?
**[00:08] Peanut**
They don't need one, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:13] Hinata**
Wow, look at all the books.
**[00:16] Mito**
Oh, *Hamlet*.
**[00:17] Mito**
"To be or not to be? That is the question."
**[00:20] Hina**
What brought all that on?
**[00:21] Mito**
It's a famous line written by Shakespeare.
**[00:23] Mito**
You see it come up online a lot nowadays.
**[00:26] Shiro**
Oh, I know him!
**[00:27] Shiro**
"Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?"
That guy, right?
**[00:31] Mito**
Right! He's an incredibly
famous poet and playwright.
**[00:35] Hime**
Siroet! Can I bring you
home with me tonight?
**[00:38] Shiro**
Okey-dokey!
**[00:40] Mirai**
There's no time for this, everyone!
We must get ready for the opening!
**[00:43] Hime**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[00:44] Shiro**
It's nearly time for the title call!
**[00:48] Mito**
Uh... we know.
**[00:49] Hinata**
I'm... uh, no, I am ready as well!
**[00:52] Hina**
Let us sally forth, then,
unto the title call!
**[00:55] Hina**
Ready and...
**[00:56] Everyone**
Virtual-san is...
**[00:58] Everyone**
Virtual-san is...
**[00:59] Everyone**
Virtual-san is...
**[01:00] Everyone**
Looking!
**[01:05] Hime**
Yeah!
**[01:06] Mito**
What the heck?
**[02:50] Mugi**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:06] Kaede**
Everyone, we've been slacking off lately!
**[03:08] Kaede**
At this rate, we'll never be
able to conquer the galaxy!
**[03:10] Kaede**
Which is why I've been thinking...
**[03:12] Miria**
I want to hear Kaede-chan's plan!
**[03:14] Kaede**
To destroy the planets of every Vtuber,
we need to infiltrate them!
**[03:17] Kaede**
So this is what I've come up with...
**[03:19] Kaede**
We need to master mimicry,
so we can impersonate other people!
**[03:23] Haruto**
I see! We make others
think we're someone else,
**[03:26] Haruto**
and once their guard is down, defeat them!
**[03:28] Haruto**
Excellent idea, chief!
**[03:30] Miria**
I'm not that good at impressions, though.
**[03:33] Miria**
Ryo-kun is the one who is!
**[03:35] Ryo**
I'm not that good at it, either.
**[03:38] Miria**
Mirai Akari-chan!
**[03:39] Ryo**
Hello! Mirai Akari here!
**[03:41] Miria**
Nekomiya Hinata-chan.
**[03:42] Ryo**
Yahoo guys, how you doing?
Nekomiya Hinata here.
**[03:46] Miria**
Tanaka Hime-chan!
**[03:47] Ryo**
Hao! I'm Tanaka Hime! Yay!
**[03:49] Miria**
Peanuts-kun.
**[03:51] Ryo**
This is really solid ground.
**[03:52] Kaede**
Ryo-kun, you're incredible!
**[03:54] Haruto**
You can infiltrate enemy
territory on your own, Ryo!
**[03:56] Kaede**
What about the rest of you?
**[03:58] Kaede**
You seem like you might have a few, Haruto.
**[03:59] Haruto**
I don't really...
**[04:01] Miria**
A certain person who says
this is a one-way street!
**[04:03] Haruto**
Can I help you with something, Kihara-kun?
**[04:06] Miria**
Someone hard to notice that plays basketball!
**[04:07] Haruto**
I'm a shadow.
**[04:08] Miria**
Not bad, Harutrash!
**[04:10] Miria**
Now it's my turn!
**[04:11] Miria**
It's that person who barfs people up!
**[04:14] Haruto**
So many mini-pink idiots! What even is this?!
**[04:18] Ryo**
Miria-chan, that's less an impersonation
and more of a shocking trick!
**[04:21] Haruto**
Not to mention useless when
it comes to infiltrating!
**[04:24] Kaede**
Okay, I'm going to go last with something
I think might be good for infiltrating.
**[04:27] Kaede**
It's a housewife who gets caught
shoplifting on reality TV!
**[04:30] Ryo**
Why would that help!?
***SIGN*** Well, I wasn't planning on shoplifting, but before I knew it, it was in of my purse.
***SIGN*** Can you just let me go? I'll pay for it.
***SIGN*** I told you, I wasn't shoplifting!
**[04:40] Haruto**
Hey, I think the chief might have
taken too well to her role!
**[04:44] Ryo**
Miria-chan, you can stop throwing up!
**[04:45] Kaede**
Please, just don't tell
my husband about this!
**[04:48] Narration**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[04:58] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[05:01] Grandma**
"Uogokoro areba mizugokoro."
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Uogokoro Areba
Mizugokoro
**[05:05] Banner**
That's the phrase.
**[05:08] Banner**
It refers to how being shown good will
can encourage someone to do the same.
**[05:13] Granny**
I thought I'd talk a bit about Valentine's Day
and White Day this week.
**[05:18] Granny**
Valentine's Day started becoming a fixture
in Japan in the latter half of the 1970s.
**[05:24] Granny**
And White Day in the first half of the 1980s.
**[05:29] Granny**
The specifics about the dates weren't
really commonly known at the time,
**[05:33] ---**
so it took them a while to
actually take a hold, culturally.
**[05:37] Granny**
There are all kinds of interesting
chocolates out there now, aren't there?
**[05:42] Granny**
You know, like glasses or bats!
Like, chocolate bats...
**[05:45] Granny**
I think it'd be wonderful if this program
**[05:47] ---**
was a chance to be immortalized
in chocolate myself.
**[05:50] Granny**
A life-sized chocolate Kobayashi Sachiko!
**[05:53] Granny**
We'll call it...
**[05:54] Granny**
Godivava.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Lost Alien Akuhato
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[06:09] Hat**
My homeland, the Ugarid Nebula,
was destroyed by invaders,
**[06:13] Hat**
and I have come to Earth as a refugee,
the Alien Akuhato.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[06:24] Alice**
Virtual-san is looking! Yeah!
**[06:30] Hinata**
Hello, everybody!
**[06:33] Hinata**
You keeping it virtual out there?
**[06:34] Hinata**
Because it's time for Virtual Radio!
**[06:37] Hinata**
We've got another great virtual
song to introduce today!
**[06:41] Hinata**
This one...
**[06:43] Hinata**
...is a cute and pop magical number,
**[06:46] Hinata**
where the "Hello! Hello!" calls are so catchy,
they'll leave you with a spring in your step!
**[06:49] Hinata**
It's a super pop and sexy
virtual cutie cool song!
**[06:54] Hinata**
Let's throw it on now! This is
Mirai Akari's "Mirai to Mirai."
***SIGN*** "Mirai to Mirai"
By: Mirai Akari
**[07:21] Hinata**
That's a nice virtual song!
**[07:24] Hinata**
That was "Mirai to Mirai" by Mirai Akari.
**[07:28] Hinata**
See you next time! Keep it V!
**[07:38] Ryo**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[07:44] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:45] Aoi**
There!
**[07:45] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:46] Aoi**
There!
**[07:47] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:47] Aoi**
There!
**[07:48] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:49] Aoi**
There! There! There!
**[07:50] Gori**
Hello... Hello... Hello... Hello...
**[07:54] Aoi**
Huh? G-Gori-chan?
**[08:00] Gori**
Hello!
**[08:01] Aoi**
I can't reach that far!
**[08:03] Both**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[08:05] Gori**
Hello.
**[08:08] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[08:13] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[08:20] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[08:21] Hime**
Akari-san, we've got ever such big trouble!
**[08:24] Akari**
Well, what's going on?
**[08:25] Hime**
Someone with the pen name "Ochabba-kun"
is in trouble! They've got problems!
**[08:27] Hime**
Hurry, take it! Read it, read it now!
**[08:29] Akari**
Okay, fork it over, come on!
**[08:32] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello!
**[08:33] Hime**
H'lo.
**[08:35] Akari**
"I loaned my friend a
video game a while ago,
**[08:37] Akari**
and it's now been three months
with no sign of them returning it."
**[08:40] Akari**
"Do you think they intend on keeping it?"
**[08:42] Akari**
"They might have just forgotten about it,
**[08:43] Akari**
so I have trouble bringing up, because I
don't want them to think I'm accusing them."
***SIGN*** Problem: A loaned game isn't being returned
**[08:47] Hime**
This is an awkward one!
**[08:49] Akari**
True enough...
**[08:50] Hime**
Did he swipe it?
**[08:50] Akari**
But three months is a weird
amount of time, y'know?
**[08:54] Hime**
Yeah, three months!
**[08:55] Hime**
I mean, the game might
take that long to finish!
**[08:57] Akari**
True, if it's a longer one!
**[08:59] Hime**
Right, right!
**[09:00] Akari**
And you're friends, so it's hard
to really come down hard on it.
**[09:03] Hime**
Right, totally!
**[09:04] Akari**
What to do?
**[09:06] Hime**
This is a hard one!
**[09:08] Hime**
Huh?
**[09:10] ---**
Mirai-san?
**[09:12] Hime**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:13] Hikari**
The best thing is to wait patiently.
**[09:16] Hikari**
I mean, there are other games to play!
**[09:18] Yami**
You need to dox people like this.
**[09:21] Yami**
Get some proof they swiped
your game and let 'er rip!
**[09:23] Hikari**
But they're friends! Could you please not?
**[09:26] Yami**
Well, you take it from here, Akari.
**[09:29] Hime**
Hello?
**[09:31] Hime**
Hello! Mirai-san!
**[09:34] Akari**
Sorry! I'm back!
**[09:35] Hime**
Welcome home.
**[09:36] Akari**
Not sure what that was about.
**[09:37] Hime**
Must be rough!
**[09:39] Akari**
Well, pen name Ochabba-kun,
I'm gonna get to the bottom line.
**[09:44] Hime**
Is this it?!
**[09:46] ---**
She's going to show her bottom! Line?
**[09:48] Akari**
You need to have your friend
become a Let's Player!
**[09:52] Hime**
Let's Plays?!
**[09:53] Akari**
Right!
**[09:54] Akari**
You set things up for them,
**[09:56] Akari**
so that they can become
a famous Let's Player!
**[09:58] Akari**
Their handle can be "1BRO."
**[10:00] Akari**
1BRO? But they're not brothers!
**[10:03] Akari**
What the heck? What the
heck's that about, then?
**[10:05] Akari**
Then how about "Ninja"?
**[10:06] Hime**
Ninja?! That's one lonely ninja!
**[10:08] Hime**
Then, after they're famous,
**[10:10] Hime**
you set things up so that their stream is
going to show their LINE window instead!
**[10:15] Hime**
Then you capture an image of
a LINE message where you say,
**[10:17] ---**
"Ever since you swiped that game a year ago,
and my heart and body have been aching!"
**[10:20] ---**
and stick it on the stream.
**[10:23] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go check out ○Bro's videos!
**[10:27] Akari**
Make sure you watch the TLOU one, Tanaka!
**[10:29] Hime**
"Hey everyone, good morneveningafternoon!"
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[10:42] Hinata**
There!
**[10:48] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[10:50] Hinata**
If falling onto the road to
school would be a game over,
**[10:52] Hinata**
and I needed to get from
one side to the other,
**[10:54] Hinata**
maybe the first thing is to
hook onto the stone wall,
**[10:56] ---**
then the overhang to get onto
the roof of that building,
**[10:59] Hinata**
and then try a big jump, which should
just barely let me catch the edge.
**[11:04] Hinata**
I think that'd work.
**[11:05] Hinata**
But maybe the safer way is to
just jump from the stone wall.
**[11:10] Hinata**
What a choice.
**[11:12] Hinata**
But y'know, if I can catch
onto the wall on the right,
**[11:15] Hinata**
the rest of the way should be simple!
**[11:18] Hinata**
Well, I wonder, maybe...
**[11:20] Hinata**
I might break some sort
of speedrunning record!
**[11:32] Hinata**
Yeah, it doesn't work that
way in reality, I guess.
**[11:37] Hinata**
Guess I'll head to school.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:41] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[11:44] Shiro**
And so is Siro!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[11:51] Shiro**
Oh, it's Kaede-chan and Miria-chan! Welcome!
**[11:55] Kaede**
We are so fed up!
**[11:57] Miria**
Can we get some trivia about baths, please?
**[12:00] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:05] Shiro**
Baths, huh?
***SIGN*** "Baths"
**[12:10] Shiro**
You know about putting a towel on your head
when you're soaking in hot water, right?
**[12:14] Shiro**
Well, it turns out it's not just a
tradition about where to put your towel,
**[12:17] Shiro**
but that there's a scientific
basis for doing it!
**[12:21] Shiro**
By putting a wet towel on your
head after gently wringing it out,
**[12:25] Shiro**
the water evaporating from
it will cool your head off!
**[12:28] Shiro**
It helps prevent the kind of dizziness you can
get from soaking in hot water for too long!
**[12:33] Shiro**
By the way, in the Edo period,
there were bathhouses on boats,
**[12:37] Shiro**
which is why another word for bathtub is
"yubune," with the "bune" meaning "boat."
**[12:43] Kaede**
Wow, really?
**[12:45] Miria**
Your trivia really is
always handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Domeki Akira
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[12:54] Akira**
It's nice to meet you, everyone.
**[12:55] Akira**
My name is Domeki Akira.
**[12:58] Akira**
Now, I know my name might
mean "hundred-eyed demon,"
**[13:00] Akira**
but I'm not a youkai,
so there are no eyes on my arm.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:09] Mito**
When I think about the order
of guests I've had so far,
**[13:11] Mito**
today's will probably be that 280-year-old.
**[13:16] Elu**
Mito-Mito-chan!
**[13:18] Mito**
Hey, an elf!
**[13:19] Elu**
How mean!
**[13:20] Elu**
You know it's me, the high-minded elven
beauty from the land of elves, Elu!
**[13:24] Mito**
Could you give me your legal name, then?
**[13:26] Elu**
Snow White Paradise El Santo
Flow Wasurena Pure Pri...
**[13:29] Mito**
Sorry, my fault for asking.
**[13:31] Mito**
Well, today we're doing the ultimate "would
you rather" committee with Elu-san!
**[13:35] ---**
Here's the subject. Which
superpower would you rather have?
**[13:38] ---**
A) The power to read people's minds.
**[13:40] ---**
B) The power to see the future.
**[13:42] ---**
Elu-chan, you're not human in the
first place, so I imagine you
**[13:44] ---**
might have some kind of superpower, do you?
**[13:46] Elu**
Okay, first, discriminate much?
**[13:47] Mito**
What do you mean?
**[13:48] Elu**
But y'know, I'd like a power that'd let me
know if my forest was going to burn down.
**[13:51] Mito**
That's oddly specific.
**[13:53] Mito**
But which of these options would you prefer?
**[13:55] Elu**
I guess if I had to pick one,
I'd pick the ability to see the future.
**[13:58] Mito**
But if you could do that,
**[14:00] ---**
you might know if you're
going to die in five minutes,
**[14:04] Mito**
or that the elf forest is going
to be burned down, right?
**[14:06] Elu**
But I'd be able to choose my last words,
and make sure I've taken care of business...
**[14:10] Mito**
Things you wanted to get done?
**[14:11] Mito**
What specifically would that be?
**[14:13] Elu**
Huh... I'm not sure.
**[14:14] ---**
Maybe eat my favorite food?
**[14:15] Elu**
Well, one thing would be changing my
LINE name to "Thank you for everything."
**[14:20] Mito**
That is super morbid!
**[14:22] Mito**
Okay, it's time.
**[14:23] Mito**
Today's answer is A, the ability
to read people's minds!
**[14:27] Elu**
We didn't talk about that at all, though!
**[14:30] Mito**
If you control people's minds,
you'll never have to worry about a bad future!
**[14:32] Mito**
Live in the present!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
***SIGN*** Special Announcement
***SIGN*** The Sudden Appearance of a City
***SIGN*** Overflowing with crowds
***SIGN*** Giant Growth
***SIGN*** Transformation
***SIGN*** The secrets of the opening are about to be revealed!?
***SIGN*** Coming Soon!!
**[14:53] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[14:59] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[15:01] Unity**
Boom!
**[15:02] Unity**
Ootori Kohaku here!
**[15:04] Unity**
I'm really athletic, y'know!
**[15:07] Unity**
My dream is to become
an action star some day!
**[15:16] Unity**
Here I come!
**[15:20] Unity**
Secret technique,
**[15:20] Unity**
Curry Crou-ken!
**[15:25] Unity**
I'm sorry! I overdid it!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Akumano Maga
**[15:31] Maga**
I'm Akumano Maga.
**[15:33] Maga**
Did you know that demons
don't really have genders?
**[15:38] Maga**
Maybe I'm what you all call...
**[15:41] Maga**
An otokonoko. Maybe!
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[15:47] Hina**
Gorillaga!
**[15:48] Kerin**
Gorilla!
**[15:48] Gori**
Hello!
**[15:49] Hime**
Want to grab some banana shakes?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[15:55] Hina**
So, what are we here for this time, Hime?
**[15:58] Hime**
Well, you remember that
dark elf from last time?
**[16:02] Hime**
And when he mentioned the legendary,
beautiful god elf known throughout the land!
**[16:06] Hina**
Elu-san?
**[16:07] Hime**
Yeah!
**[16:08] Hime**
And this is forest that Elu-san revived by
**[16:10] ---**
releasing all of her aura
through an oath and a vow!
**[16:15] Hina**
Look, Hime!
**[16:18] Hime**
More Keblins!
**[16:19] Hina**
Fine, then!
**[16:21] Hina**
Expecchan Patrol!
**[16:25] Hime**
That's some crazy magic you've got, again!
**[16:27] Hina**
Look, Hime, there's another one!
**[16:31] Hime**
Personal Home Security Patrol!
**[16:35] Hina**
That's just another way of describing a NEET!
**[16:38] Hime**
I messed up! And now the Keblins are here!
**[16:43] Kerin**
Hey, what are you guys doing?
**[16:44] Both**
Th-That voice...
**[16:46] Both**
Yamikumo Kerin!
***SIGN*** Yami
***SIGN*** Yamikumo
***SIGN*** Ke
***SIGN*** Keri
***SIGN*** Kerin
**[16:51] Kerin**
You guys are here again?
**[16:53] Kerin**
Well, you're not getting away this time.
**[16:55] Hina**
N-Now hang on, Kerin, you've
got the wrong idea!
**[16:58] Hina**
The Keblins started attacking us!
**[17:00] Hime**
Hina, we've got no choice!
**[17:02] Hime**
After all, we're Kerin Slayers!
**[17:04] Hime**
It's our job to exterminate dark elves!
**[17:07] Kerin**
Suits me fine.
**[17:08] Kerin**
I'm gonna blow you both up!
**[17:13] Kerin**
It's the ultimate super
maximum magic, Buchitema!
**[17:16] Kerin**
Get out of Elu-san's forest, you two!
**[17:19] Hime**
We'll have to use our
ultimate combo attack, then!
**[17:23] Hime**
Let's go, Hina!
**[17:24] Hina**
I get what you mean, Hime!
**[17:26] Hime & Hina**
In the name of the Girly Girl Empire!
**[17:29] Hime**
This hand of mine is burning pink!
**[17:32] Hina**
Its loud roar tells us to grasp success!
**[17:35] Hime & Hina**
Erupting Sekiha Hao Ken!
**[17:39] Kerin**
Blast 'em!
**[17:42] Hime & Hina**
Hao!
**[17:47] Elu**
Hold it right there!
**[17:49] Everybody**
That voice... could it be?!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:01] Uma**
Can you hear me out, Sister?
**[18:04] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:05] Uma**
There's this girl I want to tell how I—
**[18:07] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[18:13] Sister**
What is it?
**[18:14] Sora**
I think I've put on weight by
snacking at night too much!
**[18:17] Sora**
Oh man, what am I gonna do?!
**[18:19] Sister**
You've lost to the sweet temptation
of late night snacks, I see.
**[18:24] Sora**
Yeah! The more I try to resist, the better
it tastes when I finally eat something!
**[18:29] Sister**
Let me suggest a snack that should
**[18:31] ---**
fulfill that sensation while also
limiting how guilty you feel.
**[18:33] Sora**
Really?!
**[18:34] Sister**
It's made from a type of
algae so it's full of
**[18:37] ---**
minerals and nutrients:
agar jelly with anmitsu syrup.
**[18:39] Sister**
It's got a lot of dietary fiber to
suppress carbohydrate absorption,
**[18:43] ---**
which should also help relieve your hunger.
**[18:45] Sora**
I get it!
**[18:46] Sora**
I'm gonna get my fill of
agar jelly starting today!
**[18:51] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[18:53] Uma**
Jiggly agar jelly!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:00] Kaede**
Why, why?! Virtual-san is looking!
**[19:05] Shiro**
Well, we've got a letter here.
**[19:08] Shiro**
It's from pen name "Urban Riemann."
**[19:10] Everybody**
Thanks for writing!
**[19:13] Shiro**
"I'm getting tired of being an officer worker
and thinking about a change in careers."
**[19:17] Shiro**
"What kind of occupation
should I pursue next?"
**[19:20] Shiro**
"By the way, my hobbies are gourmet dining,
reading, and walking."
**[19:26] Shiro**
So he writes, and he's
talking about jobs, right?
**[19:29] Shiro**
Do you all have any kind
of jobs that you like
**[19:31] Shiro**
that show up in anime or manga?
**[19:34] Akari**
Me, me! Vampire!
***SIGN*** Favorite jobs from
anime and manga
**[19:35] Hime**
Papaya?
**[19:37] Hina**
Sounds tasty!
**[19:37] Akari**
No!
**[19:39] Akari**
I mean, I like papaya.
**[19:41] Akari**
I said vampire!
**[19:42] Somebody**
Vampires!
**[19:43] Hina**
Oh, right!
**[19:44] Hime**
I wanna be, like...
**[19:45] Hime**
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh!
**[19:46] Shiro**
A ninja!
**[19:47] Hime**
I wanna be zipping and zapping all over!
**[19:49] Hinata**
Then I'm gonna be king of the pirates.
**[19:51] Hime**
Sounds good!
**[19:53] Mito**
I think I'd like to be a mage.
**[19:56] Shiro**
Mito-mito, you give me more
of a sage vibe than a mage.
**[20:00] Mito**
I suppose that'd work, too.
**[20:02] Shiro**
I think Akari-chan would make a good
gadabout, since her costume is so cute...
**[20:07] Akari**
For real?
**[20:07] Akari**
What's a gadabout do, anyway?
**[20:09] Shiro**
Well, they have really high luck stats.
**[20:12] Akari**
Luck shats?
**[20:14] Hime**
Shats?
**[20:15] Shiro**
No!
**[20:15] Hinata**
Akari-chan...
**[20:17] Akari**
Sorry, sorry, sorry!
**[20:20] Mito**
You're so bad, Akari-san.
**[20:22] Akari**
I thought she was talking
about high level shats!
**[20:25] Hime**
I did, too!
**[20:27] Shiro**
I think I'd be a white wizard.
**[20:30] Hime**
That's perfect!
**[20:31] Hina**
I'd wanna get healed by you!
**[20:33] Hina**
I think I'd want to be a gambler,
something that's kind of cool!
**[20:38] Hinata**
We've got a millionaire!
**[20:39] Hina**
Suzuki plays hard! You know?
**[20:44] Shiro**
So what kind of job should Urban Riemann,
who sent in the letter, get?
***SIGN*** What kind of job should
Urban Riemann get?
**[20:50] Shiro**
His hobbies are gourmet dining,
reading, and walking.
**[20:53] Mito**
Dining, reading, and walking?
**[20:55] Mito**
Is there a job where you eat?
**[20:57] Hime**
Sounds good to me!
**[20:58] Shiro**
Like a professional speed eater?
**[21:00] Hime**
Oh, I love those contests!
**[21:03] Mirai**
But what if he loses weight doing it?
**[21:05] Hina**
He could be a big eater who's skinny?
**[21:07] Hime**
Would that be a good fit for TV?
**[21:09] Hime**
Maybe?
**[21:10] Mito**
For walking, he could walk
around while eating.
**[21:12] Mito**
But that's a recipe for
smacking into something.
**[21:14] Hime**
Smackeroonie!
**[21:16] Akari**
Say that again, Tanaka?
**[21:17] Hime**
Sma... don't wanna.
**[21:19] Hime**
Don't try and make me say that sorta thing!
**[21:20] Mito**
She caught on... well done.
**[21:24] Shiro**
Well, that's it for this
week, so until next week...
**[21:29] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Weatheroid Type A Airi (Ponko)
**[23:10] Airi**
Good evening everybody!
**[23:13] Airi**
I'm Type A Airi, the weatheroid!
**[23:15] Airi**
I warned everybody about the cold
weather coming up the other day
**[23:19] Airi**
and ended up catching a cold myself!
**[23:21] Airi**
It's still possible, even
when you're an android!
**[23:23] Airi**
My nose won't stop dripping oil!
**[23:24] Airi**
Are any of you feeling under the weather?
**[23:27] Airi**
When you're feeling sick in virtual town,
it's called restarting.
**[23:30] Airi**
So next time you're feeling bad,
try restarting, and hang in there!
**[23:32] Airi**
Next time, it's "PP Dance Festival."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"PP Dance Festival"
**[23:35] Airi**
Virtual-san will be looking next week, too!
# E6 - PP Dance Festival
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR8D7N7WR/pp-dance-festival)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
Y'know, Oda Nobunaga used to
call Hideyoshi a "bald rat."
**[00:07] Uma**
Yo! Bald peanut!
**[00:08] Peanut**
I'm not bald, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:13] Hina**
There's a gym and this huge library.
**[00:16] Hina**
This dorm is really something! I love it!
**[00:19] Shiro**
Considering how big it is, maybe there's
an entrance to a secret room somewhere!
**[00:23] Hime**
Like the kind where you say
a password for it to open?
**[00:26] Hime**
Hm... Open, Comăneci!
**[00:29] Hime**
Wow, something actually came out! Awesome!
**[00:33] Hinata**
What the heck is this? Holy cow!
It's a whole secret base!
**[00:37] Hinata**
So cool! What's it for?
What's the special mission?
**[00:39] Akari**
Oh, Hinata's hype meter is maxed out!
**[00:43] Mito**
Tanaka, take it away.
**[00:44] Hime**
Aye-aye, sir!
**[00:45] ---**
This is being called "Operation:
Let's All Work Hard to
**[00:47] ---**
Actually Do the Title Call
so the Opening Can Play!"
**[00:50] ---**
Ready, and...
**[00:51] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:37] Kaede**
I choose you! Virtual-san is looking.
**[02:50] Kaede**
Last week ended up turning into
a talent contest, somehow.
**[02:53] Ryo**
Especially in Miria-chan's case.
**[02:54] Miria**
It's fine! Those mini-mes
were really cute, right?
**[02:57] Haruto**
We'd be in dire straights
with any more pink fools!
**[03:00] Miria**
Oh, right! I came up with a new plan!
**[03:03] Kaede**
Just what we needed!
Let's hear it, Miria-chan!
**[03:06] Miria**
I call it "Operation: Every Rose Has
Its Toxins! Deadly Poison Cooking!"
**[03:11] Haruto**
Cooking? You maniac, are you
trying to get the chief to—?!
**[03:14] Miria**
Shh!
**[03:14] Kaede**
Trying to get me to do what?
**[03:16] Miria**
Well, Kaede-chan, since we'll need to take
our time and have a briefing on the plan,
**[03:20] Miria**
maybe you should make
some cookies beforehand!
**[03:22] Ryo**
Miria-chan, you can't—
**[03:24] Kaede**
Cookies, huh! It's been a while!
**[03:27] Kaede**
I'm gonna do my best, then!
**[03:29] ---**
Which way was the kitchen again?
**[03:30] Kaede**
I think this is the first time
I've cooked on this battleship!
**[03:32] Haruto**
You pink fool! How could you
incite the chief like this?!
**[03:35] Miria**
Shut up! You know as well as I do how
powerful Kaede-chan's deadly poison cooking is!
**[03:39] Ryo**
Miria-chan, you can't...
**[03:41] Ryo**
Our sweet chief is going to become a vessel
for something from another reality...
**[03:44] Miria**
But if we feed the stuff to our
enemies, they'll be totally toast!
**[03:46] Haruto**
You do make a type of sense, but...
**[03:50] Ryo**
What was that?!
**[03:51] Haruto**
An enemy attack?! Damn them!
**[03:53] Miria**
No! The explosion came from the kitchen!
**[03:57] Ryo**
That was the chief!
**[03:58] Miria**
Oh, no! I never bothered to look
into how Kaede-chan actually cooks!
**[04:02] Haruto**
At this rate, the battleship will be scuttled
before we can feed our foes the cookies!
**[04:06] Kaede**
Sorry for scaring you all!
**[04:08] Kaede**
It's been a while, so I tried my best!
**[04:10] Kaede**
The cookies are ready, though!
**[04:12] Haruto**
Such an aura! Is it dark matter?!
**[04:15] Miria**
Talk about intense.
**[04:17] Kaede**
Come on! Eat up! And we'll go over the plan.
**[04:20] Miria**
Kaede-chan, the plan is to give
these cookies to our enemies,
**[04:24] Miria**
and then take them out while
they're enjoying the snack!
**[04:27] Ryo**
Okay, good explanation!
**[04:28] Kaede**
Oh, so that's the plan!
**[04:31] Kaede**
I'll make some more, then!
**[04:32] Kaede**
That way you all can eat these!
**[04:35] Kaede**
Go on, don't be shy!
**[04:36] Haruto**
Hey, pink fool, we're gonna
have to brace ourselves.
**[04:39] Miria**
Harutrash, you...
**[04:42] Miria**
I guess it'd be rude to
Kaede-chan, otherwise.
**[04:44] Miria**
Ready to do this, Ryo-kun?
**[04:47] Everybody**
Thanks for the cookies.
***SIGN*** 1 Minute Later
**[04:54] Kaede**
Guys! Who did this to you?!
**[04:57] Miria**
I knew my plan was a good one.
**[05:04] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[05:12] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[05:16] Grandma**
Choda no Retsu.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Choda no Retsu
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:19] Banner**
As in, a particularly long line.
**[05:21] Banner**
Are there any places you can think
of when it comes to long lines?
**[05:26] Banner**
For me, it's movie theaters.
**[05:29] Grandma**
In the old days, no matter where you went,
they used to always be really crowded.
**[05:33] Grandma**
You'd end up having to stand to watch!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:35] Grandma**
That was actually something that
was allowed in theaters back then.
**[05:41] Grandma**
This was on top of doing
double and triple features.
**[05:44] Grandma**
A particular memory I have
about going to the movies
**[05:47] ---**
is the music acts that would play during
the intermissions for double features.
**[05:52] Grandma**
This was actually a thing, in the old days.
**[05:54] Grandma**
The screen would rise up,
and there'd be a stage behind it.
**[05:57] Grandma**
With performances by singers and bands.
**[06:00] Grandma**
They'd be on standby behind the screen
until it was time for them to perform,
**[06:06] Grandma**
so they could actually enjoy the movie
from back there while they were waiting!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:11] Grandma**
And then after the movie ended,
they'd play in the theater again.
**[06:15] Grandma**
By the way, a movie that made a big
impression on me at the time was *Mothra*!
**[06:23] Grandma**
I'm a bit like her myself, nowadays.
Whoosh! You know? Whoosh!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:31] Grandma**
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh!
**[06:37] Grandma**
Whoosh!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:39] Grandma**
Whoosh!
**[06:42] Grandma**
Whoosh!
**[06:49] Akari**
V-V-Virtual-san is looking!
**[06:53] Aoi**
Y-You don't have to look, if you want.
**[06:57] Aoi**
But I want you to.
**[06:59] Aoi**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[07:07] Gori**
What's the matter?
**[07:09] Aoi**
Nothing.
**[07:11] Gori**
If you don't mind talking to
a gorilla, you can tell me.
**[07:14] Aoi**
Thank you, Gori-chan.
**[07:21] Aoi**
See, I...
**[07:22] Gori**
Hello?
**[07:24] Aoi**
...wanna go into space.
**[07:28] Gori**
Hello!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:33] Gori**
Hello.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[07:38] Hinata**
This is bad! Real bad! But I can't panic.
**[07:42] Hinata**
It'll be rough, though.
**[07:44] Hinata**
There are two generators
I still need to repair.
**[07:47] Hinata**
Probably on the other side
of this bridge, but...
**[07:49] Hinata**
But should I really go across?
**[07:51] Hinata**
It'd mean leaving the other
survivors on this side.
**[07:55] Hinata**
In that other round, I let them
all die and survived by myself.
**[07:59] Hinata**
Maybe that's why I have no friends.
**[08:02] Hinata**
But if the killer crosses the
bridge, they'll be able to
**[08:05] ---**
see me in the distance,
and I'll be dead in no time!
**[08:08] Hinata**
Dead or alive!
**[08:13] Hinata**
Okay, let's do it!
**[08:14] Hinata**
Even if it means betraying the others,
I've gotta find those generators!
**[08:19] Hinata**
Crap, I ran.
**[08:21] Hinata**
I'm gonna die!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[08:27] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[08:33] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[08:40] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[08:42] Hime**
Man, I'm rusty! Here, read this!
**[08:44] Hime**
Just read it already!
**[08:45] Akari**
Okay, okay!
**[08:48] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san."
**[08:48] Hime**
H'lo.
**[08:49] Akari**
Hello!
**[08:50] Hime**
H'lo!
**[08:50] Akari**
"The other day, I heard
rumors that a friend was
**[08:53] ---**
badmouthing me, and got depressed about it."
**[08:55] Akari**
"These weren't things
said directly to my face,
**[08:58] ---**
but I thought this person and I were good
friends, so it came as a huge shock."
**[09:02] Akari**
"I've had trouble talking
to them ever since."
**[09:05] ---**
"What do you think I should do?"
***SIGN*** Problem: Badmouthed by a friend
**[09:07] Hime**
That's sad!
**[09:10] Akari**
Hey Hime, try badmouthing me!
**[09:13] Hime**
Badmouth you?!
**[09:14] Akari**
Yeah.
**[09:15] Hime**
Y-You got black panties!
**[09:16] Akari**
Uh, hang on, is that supposed to be bad?
**[09:18] Hime**
W-Was it supposed to be?
**[09:20] Akari**
Don't you always show
off your panties, Hime?
**[09:22] Hime**
Yes, I am! Here, see?
**[09:24] Hime**
Whoo.
**[09:25] Hime**
Whacha think?
**[09:28] Hime**
Uh, Mirai-san? Hey, are you there?
**[09:30] Hime**
Mirai-san!
**[09:32] Yami**
How about a rap battle where you both
just get it all out in the open?
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:36] Hikari**
That's not a bad idea!
**[09:38] Yami**
If you're gonna talk crap to someone else,
**[09:40] Yami**
you may as well say it to the
person you've got an issue with.
**[09:43] Hikari**
Wow, Yami-chan, you're making sense!
**[09:46] Yami**
Oh, damn, that's kind of OOC.
**[09:50] Hime**
Hello? Hello! Earth to Mirai-san!
**[09:54] Akari**
Oh man, something smells a lot like panties.
**[09:57] Hime**
Smells?!
**[09:58] Akari**
Y'know, like pumpkins. I wonder what it is?
**[10:02] Akari**
Anyway, pen name "Aruto-kun"!
**[10:04] Akari**
Here's the bottom line!
**[10:07] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
**[10:11] Akari**
You need to embrace your friend.
**[10:13] ---**
Period!
**[10:15] Hime**
So fast!
**[10:16] Hime**
So the idea is to shut the person who
was saying bad things up, huh?! Awesome!
**[10:21] Akari**
Tanaka, do you know what I mean
when I say "embrace" them?
**[10:24] Hime**
Embrace? No. I'm just a little girl, so nope.
**[10:27] Akari**
Well, what you do is...
***SIGN*** and then their so
then you the over
to , and then gets ,
and you put into
with aimed at...
***SIGN*** ° Since it was full of , this scene was
**[10:34] Hime**
I get it! It's some kind
of beeping party, right?
**[10:37] Akari**
Bingo!
**[10:38] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go to the bookstore
and look up some books on beeping!
**[10:41] Akari**
Wait!
**[10:42] Akari**
Wait, wait! You're too young
to mess with that stuff!
**[10:44] Akari**
They won't even let you into
that corner of the book store!
**[10:47] Hime**
Beep, peep, pee, Peenut-kun! Yeah!
**[10:51] Peanuts**
That's not how you spell my name!
**[11:01] Hinata**
Hello, everybody!
**[11:04] Hinata**
You keeping it virtual out there?
**[11:05] Hinata**
Because it's time for Virtual Radio!
**[11:08] Hinata**
We've got another virtual banger
for you today. You ready for this?
**[11:13] Hinata**
This one...
**[11:14] Hinata**
has got a wild style, but refined production,
a real goriginal song!
**[11:17] Hinata**
The yearning in the lyrics left me
with a g-ape-ing hole in my heart,
**[11:22] Hinata**
a real miraculous, heart-string-twinging,
lovely, drumming ook-ook song!
**[11:26] Hinata**
With his natural strength,
he gives you wild power!
**[11:28] Hinata**
Let me throw it on for you.
**[11:30] Hinata**
This is Virtual Gorilla's "Like a Gorilla!"
***SIGN*** "Like a Gorilla"
By: Virtual Gorilla
**[12:02] Hinata**
Now that's a nice virtual song!
**[12:05] Hinata**
That was "Like A Gorilla" by Virtual Gorilla!
**[12:09] Hinata**
See you next time, gori gori master!
**[12:19] Toya**
Yeah! Virtual-san is looking! Ready, go!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:27] Shiro**
Oh, Iroha-chan! Welcome!
**[12:30] Kaede**
I am so fed up!
**[12:33] Kaede**
Can I get some trivia about
strawberries, please?
***SIGN*** "Strawberries"
**[12:41] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[12:43] Shiro**
Did you know that strawberries
aren't actually berries?
**[12:50] Iroha**
Mm, I could go for more.
**[12:53] Iroha**
Give me another.
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[13:00] Shiro**
Well, two strawberries contain about as
much Vitamin C as your typical lemon.
**[13:05] Shiro**
But that's if we're talking
about typically-sized ones.
**[13:08] Shiro**
In 2015, the Guinness World Record
for biggest strawberry weighed
**[13:14] ---**
250 grams, and was 12 cm long and
8 cm wide, like a meat bun!
**[13:21] Shiro**
It makes you wonder how many lemons
worth of vitamin C that one had, huh?
**[13:24] Shiro**
And it turns out that this record
is held by a farmer in Fukuoka!
**[13:29] Shiro**
And did you know that strawberries
are part of the Rosaceae family?
**[13:32] Shiro**
Belonging to the same family as roses
adds a bit of wonder, doesn't it?
**[13:36] Shiro**
Now you know those little things
that poke out of a strawberry?
**[13:42] Shiro**
You might think, aren't the
thorns on roses on the stem?
**[13:46] Shiro**
Well, it turns out, the part of the
strawberries we eat are considered part of the stem!
**[13:50] Shiro**
And the little grain things on
strawberries are actually their seeds!
**[13:57] Iroha**
Wow, really?
**[13:59] ---**
Your trivia is always handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Satou-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[14:11] Satou**
I am so tired today...
**[14:14] Satou**
I know!
**[14:15] Satou**
I can watch *Virtual-san*!
**[14:18] Satou**
But I'm so sleepy.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[14:25] Mito**
Now then, who did I manage to drag in today?
**[14:33] Rin**
Mito-san!
**[14:34] Rin**
Do you know where I can find
some shredded-looking gentlemen?
**[14:36] Mito**
ShizuRin-senpai, calm down.
**[14:38] Mito**
That was just a lie I told you to
get you to show up for the segment!
**[14:41] Mito**
Now then, ShizuRin-senpai, it's time for the
the ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[14:45] Rin**
But...
**[14:46] Mito**
Which would you rather see in person?
**[14:48] Mito**
A) Cyber Girl Siro-chan changing clothes.
**[14:51] Mito**
Or B) Tokino Sora-chan changing clothes.
**[14:53] Rin**
I'm watching them change?!
**[14:54] Mito**
That's right.
**[14:55] Rin**
Well, I'd like to see more of Siro-san,
**[14:57] ---**
but since I'm friends with
Sora, I guess I'd pick B?
**[15:00] Mito**
Oh, B, then?
**[15:01] Mito**
I figured that you'd be so fixated on abs
that you'd go for that one, ShizuRin-Senpai.
**[15:04] Rin**
Good point. I guess it's because... y'know?
**[15:05] ---**
How Sora-san sings so hard?
**[15:07] Mito**
True enough.
**[15:08] Rin**
It makes me wonder how
ripped her abs must be.
**[15:10] Mito**
Yeah. Idols have to be in shape, after all.
**[15:12] Mito**
But then again,
Siro-chan is an idol cadet herself.
**[15:15] Rin**
Yeah.
**[15:16] Mito**
But Siro-chan kind of
gives off a fluffy feel.
**[15:18] Rin**
Now that you mention it,
I bet her tummy is amazing.
**[15:20] Mito**
It just comes down to
different types of appeal.
**[15:22] ---**
She's the good kind of curvy.
**[15:24] Mito**
Where there's just enough meat,
that's Siro-san!
***SIGN*** *This is her personal opinion
**[15:27] Mito**
These are crucial details.
**[15:28] Rin**
I kind of feel like we've got
a difference of opinion here.
**[15:29] Mito**
Maybe.
**[15:30] Mito**
But y'know, if the network is letting us talk
about this, I wonder if they'll let us see it?
**[15:36] Rin**
Oh, you're getting my hopes up.
**[15:37] Mito**
We can actually watch them change, right?
**[15:40] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[15:41] Rin**
Ding dong ding dong...
**[15:41] Mito**
That being the case the answer is...
**[15:43] Mito**
A! Watching Cyber Girl
Siro-chan change, in person!
**[15:46] Rin**
I kind of want to know why you
bothered asking me on, then?
**[15:48] Mito**
And now the committee is closed!
**[15:50] Mito**
If you want to see Siro-san change,
I can arrange it for 10,000 yen!
**[15:52] Mito**
If that's the right answer,
we can actually show it, right?
**[15:54] Mito**
Ask the network if we can put—
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[16:00] Elu**
Virtual-san is looking, el-el!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[16:07] Unity**
It's okay! I broke it, so I can fix it!
**[16:11] Unity**
No real reason to be sure of that, but...
**[16:12] Unity**
That doesn't look right.
**[16:15] Unity**
How am I gonna explain this to Dad?
**[16:18] Unity**
I don't know where people get the idea that
I wreck any machine I touch, anyway.
**[16:21] Unity**
Shouldn't a combat robot
be more durable, anyway?
**[16:25] Unity**
Let's see...
**[16:27] Unity**
No! Calm down, just wait a second, and...
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[16:37] Lulu**
Good-lulu morning everyone!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Ayamaki Lulu
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:39] Lulu**
I'm the virtual fallen
angel idol, Ayamaki Lulu.
**[16:42] Lulu**
My favorite food is apple pie.
**[16:45] Lulu**
My least favorite is basically
all fresh vegetables.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[16:53] Hime & Hina**
In the name of the Girly Girl Empire!
**[16:55] Kerin**
Blast 'em!
**[16:56] Elu**
Hold it right there!
**[16:57] Everybody**
That voice...
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[17:02] Kerin**
Elu-san?!
**[17:03] Hina**
We finally meet!
**[17:04] Hina**
The legendary, beautiful god elf!
**[17:06] Hina**
Eru-san's here!
**[17:11] Hime**
What was that?! Why?
**[17:13] Kerin**
What did you two just do?
**[17:15] Hime**
I didn't do anything!
**[17:16] Hina**
Wait, was it me?
**[17:18] Hime**
What just happened?
**[17:19] Hime**
Try remembering and doing it again!
**[17:22] Hina**
The legendary, beautiful god elf!
**[17:26] Hime**
Nothing's happening.
**[17:27] Hime**
It seemed like lightning magic before.
**[17:29] Hina**
True, it looked kind of like the
light of El Thunder, didn't it?
**[17:35] Hime**
I've got it!
**[17:36] Hime**
"Elu-san's here," is what you thought
**[17:37] Hime**
and "Elu-san's here," is what you said,
**[17:39] Hime**
but it sounded like
"El Thunder" for some reason!
**[17:42] Kerin**
Why only me?!
**[17:44] Hina**
Oh, sorry!
**[17:45] Hina**
Hime, cut that out! You can't say El Thunder!
**[17:50] Kerin**
I'm not a lightning rod, damn it!
**[17:53] Hime**
Wow, this is really easy to do!
**[17:55] Hime**
El Thunder!
**[17:57] Kerin**
Please stop!
**[17:59] Hina**
Stop it! Kerin's life points
dropped to 0 a long time ago!
**[18:02] Kerin**
After three hard months, I was
finally able to meet Elu-san.
**[18:07] Kerin**
So why am I being fried with
lightning like this?
**[18:10] Hime**
I didn't mean anything by it. My bad, my bad!
**[18:13] Kerin**
But the lightning has cracked the statue.
**[18:18] Elu**
Hi everybody, and good elfning!
**[18:21] Elu**
I'm here from the land of elves,
the high-minded elven beauty, Elu!
**[18:27] Kerin**
The real Elu-san's here!
**[18:35] Hime**
Huh, what happened to Kerin?
**[18:37] Hina**
He went somewhere...
**[18:38] Elu**
Was someone else here?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:53] Uma**
I really hope you can hear
me out today, Sister.
**[18:55] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:57] Uma**
Well there's—
**[18:57] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:03] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:05] Sora**
I keep forgetting to lock
the door when I go out.
**[19:07] Sora**
How can I stop being so forgetful?
**[19:10] Sister**
It sounds like you're
just not cautious enough.
**[19:12] Sora**
Yeah...
**[19:12] Sister**
I understand. I know what
you can do to solve this.
**[19:16] Sora**
Really?!
**[19:17] Sister**
Change your phone's lock
screen to the keyhole.
**[19:20] Sora**
What do you mean?
**[19:21] Sister**
When you're on your way out,
you'll likely give it a casual glance.
**[19:23] Sister**
But if your lock screen is the keyhole,
if you've forgotten, it'll remind you.
**[19:29] Sora**
I get it! When I get home, I better
take a picture of the lock!
**[19:36] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[19:38] Uma**
Sora-Sora! You dropped your key!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:44] Peanuts**
I wanna be popular!
**[19:46] Peanuts**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[19:50] Hinata**
'Kay, we've got a letter here.
**[19:52] Hinata**
From pen name "King of Kings."
**[19:55] Everybody**
Thanks for writing!
**[19:57] Hinata**
"I have a question for you all."
**[19:59] Hinata**
"If you were the kings of a country,
what kind of nation would you build?"
**[20:05] Hinata**
He asks.
**[20:05] Hina**
Good question!
***SIGN*** If you were king,
what would your
kingdom be like?
**[20:07] Akari**
If I was royalty, I'd want to make
a law where wherever I went out,
**[20:13] Akari**
I'd be nude!
**[20:17] Mito**
Please stop making me want things!
**[20:19] Shiro**
Oh, me! Me, me, me, me!
**[20:20] Hinata**
Go ahead, Siro-chan.
**[20:21] Shiro**
If I was an awesome king, I'd make it
so that men could wear skirts, too.
**[20:29] Hime**
I like the sound of that!
**[20:29] Akari**
I think they do that in England!
**[20:31] Hina**
If I was queen, let's see...
**[20:34] Hina**
I'd order anime adaptations
for all my favorite manga!
**[20:37] Hime**
Wow! That'd be crazy!
**[20:39] Hina**
By my command!
**[20:39] Hikari**
That's awesome! I love it!
**[20:41] Mito**
Silence, all of you.
**[20:43] Mito**
Show some royal dignity.
**[20:45] Hina**
Lower your heads, all of you!
**[20:47] Mito**
Let's see...
**[20:48] Mito**
I think I'd make everyone
carry around 50 kg weights,
**[20:51] ---**
form a line, and then wander the desert,
**[20:54] Mito**
with only the survivors being able to return
to society, so that it would be more fit.
**[20:57] Hime**
That's so scary!
**[20:59] Shiro**
Like some kind of battle royal?
**[21:00] Akari**
That's really crazy!
**[21:01] Mito**
Something along those lines.
**[21:03] Hinata**
Okay, I'll wrap things up!
**[21:05] Everybody**
Yeah!
**[21:06] Hinata**
I hereby declare that that
is all for this week.
**[21:09] Shiro**
Yeah!
**[21:09] Hinata**
So, until next time,
**[21:12] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Kitakami Futaba
***SIGN*** Yamato Iori
**[22:52] Futaba**
Goodtaba evening, Kitakami Futaba here.
**[22:55] Iori**
Good morning, Yamato Iori here.
**[22:57] Futaba**
They said we could say whatever we
want during the next episode preview,
**[23:00] ---**
so what should we talk about?
**[23:02] Iori**
How about you show off your tongue
twister skill, Futaba-chan?
**[23:06] Futaba**
Sounds good! Give me one, come on!
**[23:08] Iori**
Okay, how about, "She sells
sea shells by the she—"
**[23:12] Iori**
Aw, I messed up.
**[23:14] Futaba**
No you didn't!
**[23:15] Iori**
I didn't?!
***SIGN*** Next Time
"I'm Salty"
***SIGN*** Next time is "I'm Salty."
**[23:19] Futaba**
Until next week—
**[23:20] Both**
Virtual-san is looking!
# E7 - I'm Salty
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRVD7J05R/im-salty)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Peanut**
They say those dark bits on a
banana are called "sugar spots."
**[00:05] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey! So where are
your sugar spots, Peanut?
**[00:08] Peanut**
Peanuts are salty! You horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:12] Hinata**
Hello and good evening everyone.
**[00:15] Everybody**
Good evening!
**[00:18] Hinata**
It seems *Virtual-san - Looking*
is getting good reviews.
**[00:20] Everyone**
That's nice!
**[00:22] Hinata**
And apparently there's an off-season
typhoon headed our way.
**[00:25] Everyone**
That's nice!
**[00:27] Hinata**
Nah, that's not happening!
**[00:29] Hinata**
Anyway, Akari-chan, did you cut your hair?
**[00:31] Akari**
Yeah!
**[00:33] Hinata**
And I heard that the opening song
is going to change this week?
**[00:35] Shiro**
Yep! The six of us are going
to be singing the new one.
**[00:39] Hime**
Which means you're going to be singing, too.
**[00:41] Hinata**
Really? What kind of song is it?
**[00:44] Shiro**
It's a cute, but rousing kind of song.
**[00:47] Akari**
It puts you in a sexy mood.
**[00:50] Hime**
It's a song that makes you
wanna do the Comăneci!
**[00:52] Hina**
It's the kind of wonderfully sleepy song
that you want to stick under your pillow.
**[00:55] Mito**
It's a song where you just
start to want to rap.
**[00:57] Hinata**
Everyone seems to have
a different take on it.
**[01:00] Hinata**
Well, to all our viewers, let us
know what you think at #virtualsan.
**[01:06] Hinata**
Let's get to it, here is...
**[01:09] Everyone**
"I Need More Love"!
**[02:57] Hime & Hina**
Virtual-san is...
**[02:58] Hime & Hina**
Looking!
**[03:06] Robo**
Wh-What is this?!
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:08] Mob A**
So... you're saying that when you
woke up, you had become a robot?
**[03:16] Robo**
Yeah.
**[03:18] Mob A**
And that yesterday, you were
totally normal, like me.
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:21] Robo**
Yeah.
**[03:22] Mob B**
Turning into a robot overnight
seems kind of impossible.
***SIGN*** Mob B
**[03:26] Robo**
Yeah, I know!
**[03:29] Both**
So why...?
**[03:30] Mob A**
The only possible reason I can think of...
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:32] Mob A**
is them!
**[03:34] Robo**
Ah...
**[03:35] Hime**
Hey! Where are we?
**[03:37] Hina**
Everybody seems to have the same face.
**[03:40] Mito**
Are they actually even people?
**[03:41] Hinata**
Man...
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** After-School V Time
**[03:52] Akari**
What nice weather!
**[03:54] Akari**
Man, I'm bored.
**[03:57] Akari**
So bored!
**[03:58] Hina**
Right?
**[03:58] Mito**
Really? I think that having a bit of down
time like this serves its own purpose.
**[04:03] Akari**
If I says I'm bored then I'm bored!
**[04:05] Akari**
Hina-chan, if you don't say something,
I'm gonna stare at you until you do!
**[04:11] Hina**
Then, I'll stare back! Stare!
**[04:16] Akari**
Class Prez, I'm not bored anymore!
**[04:19] Mito**
Okay, okay.
**[04:20] Mito**
How about this, then?
**[04:22] Mito**
Why don't we brainstorm ideas for things we
can do and then call them out, one by one.
**[04:26] Hina**
I'm not sure I can think of anything, though.
**[04:29] Mito**
We could pretend that the strings
for a ceiling lamp are a speed bag,
**[04:31] Mito**
or use the reverberation from a fan to talk
like aliens. Granted, those are a bit cliché.
**[04:34] Hina**
I've definitely heard of them.
**[04:36] ---**
And I dunno if either is
quite right for the moment.
**[04:38] Akari**
Try it.
**[04:39] Mito**
What, m-me?
**[04:40] Akari**
I'll do the buzzing thing that fans do, okay?
**[04:43] Mito**
All right.
**[04:44] Akari**
Vrrrm... vrrrm... vrrm...
**[04:44] Mito**
Hello! Mirai Akari here!
**[04:48] Mito**
What do you think? Sounds like you, huh?
**[04:51] Mito**
Hina-chan, you should try, too. Do me.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Factory Chief Nanoko
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[05:00] Nanoko**
Factory Chief Nanoko here!
**[05:02] Nanoko**
Let's enjoy working together
at a legitimate business,
**[05:05] Nanoko**
where we mass-produce bunnies.
**[05:13] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[05:17] Grandma**
Nashi no tsubute.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Nashi no tsubute
**[05:20] Banner**
That's the phrase.
**[05:22] Banner**
It comes from how sometimes, you never
receive a reply to correspondence.
**[05:25] Banner**
Like how you can toss a pebble,
and it won't ever come back to you.
**[05:30] Grandma**
In the old days, we used to only
have phones at home, after all.
**[05:33] Grandma**
So if you had any plans or sensitive
matters to discuss with friends,
**[05:37] ---**
you couldn't do it on the phone,
thanks to your family's prying eyes.
**[05:40] Grandma**
And if your friends ever moved far away,
**[05:43] ---**
you could generally expect
to never hear from them again.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:46] Grandma**
To put it in terms of the
modern smartphone ecosystem,
**[05:49] ---**
it'd be like LINE messages
that are never read,
**[05:52] ---**
or tweets that never
receive replies or likes.
**[05:56] Grandma**
Those would be nashi no tsubute.
**[05:58] Grandma**
Incidentally, I, Kobayashi Sachiko,
have an official Twitter as well!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:03] Grandma**
@Sachiko_5884.
**[06:08] Grandma**
The 5884 can be read as
"KO BA YA SHI," you see.
**[06:12] Grandma**
Also, make sure to tweet with
#virtualgrandmother and let me know
**[06:16] ---**
what you think of the show!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:18] Grandma**
I'll be waiting to hear from you.
**[06:22] Grandma**
Although I won't be replying all that much,
**[06:24] ---**
so that too, will be like nashi no tsubute!
**[06:30] Grandma**
But I will be reading them, okay?
**[06:31] ---**
I'll be self-searching,
and I might end up liking them.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:40] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[06:46] Gori**
Virtual-san is looking. Hello!
**[06:52] Aoi**
Gori-chan, let's play Red Light, Green Light!
**[06:56] Gori**
Hello!
**[06:57] Aoi**
Green light...
**[06:59] Aoi**
Red light!
**[07:01] Aoi**
Huh?
**[07:02] Peanut**
It's me, Peanut!
**[07:04] Aoi**
Where'd Gori-chan go?!
**[07:06] Peanut**
I ate him!
**[07:08] Gori**
Hello!
**[07:10] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:12] Gori**
Hi!
**[07:15] Aoi**
Green light...
**[07:17] Aoi**
Red light!
**[07:18] Aoi**
Huh?
**[07:19] Peanut**
It's me, Peanut!
**[07:21] Aoi**
Where's Gori-chan?
**[07:23] Peanut**
Here he is!
**[07:25] Gori**
Hello!
**[07:26] Call**
Fuji Aoi! Hello.
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:31] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
***SIGN*** Whoa, whoa, whoa... hello there.
**[07:43] Akari**
What is it, Hime-chan?
**[07:45] Hime**
Akari-chan, we've got really big trouble!
**[07:48] Mirai**
Let's see here.
**[07:50] Hime**
Someone with the pen name
"Mimi-chan" is worried!
**[07:52] Hime**
Stop clonking around and here!
Read this, would you? Go on!
**[07:54] Akari**
Sorry about that. Let's see,
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello!
**[07:56] Hime**
Hello.
**[07:56] Akari**
Hello.
**[07:57] Hime**
Hello.
**[07:58] Akari**
"Whenever I'm using my PC and try
to put something in the USB port,
**[08:01] ---**
I always end up the wrong way around."
**[08:03] Akari**
"How can I stop doing this?"
**[08:05] Hime**
Oh, I totally do that all the time!
***SIGN*** Problem: Inserting USB connectors backwards
**[08:07] Akari**
I get the feeling!
**[08:07] Hime**
That happens to everybody.
**[08:08] Akari**
Yep. It's a pretty common,
low-key frustration.
**[08:10] Hime**
I totally get it!
**[08:12] Akari**
But how to fix it? Hmm...
**[08:15] Hime**
Hey, Mirai-san?
**[08:17] Hime**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[08:19] Yami**
The problem is you rely on USB too much.
**[08:21] ---**
Just memorize the stuff you need!
**[08:23] Hikari**
But that's so much less efficient!
**[08:26] Hikari**
I'd probably just check the connector
every time, before inserting it.
**[08:29] Yami**
That's way too much work!
**[08:32] Yami**
The real problem is getting dependent
on technological advances!
**[08:35] Yami**
It wasn't that long ago that
USB tech didn't even exist!
**[08:39] Hikari**
You've got a point, but...
**[08:42] Hikari**
Oh, Akari! Take it from here!
**[08:45] Hime**
Hello! Earth to Mirai-san?
**[08:50] Akari**
Sorry, I'm back now.
**[08:52] Hime**
Oh, welcome home.
**[08:52] Akari**
Okay!
**[08:55] Akari**
Pen name Mimi-chan!
**[08:57] Akari**
Here's the bottom line!
**[09:00] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
**[09:04] Akari**
You need your own company!
**[09:07] Hime**
A c-company?!
**[09:08] Akari**
Yep! Mimi-chan is being troubled by something
as mundane as USB accessories, right?
**[09:13] Akari**
That's a pretty common
problem that everyone has!
**[09:16] Hime**
Yeah, that's true.
**[09:17] Akari**
Which means it's a business opportunity!
**[09:20] Akari**
Mimi-chan will practice connecting
USB stuff until she masters it!
**[09:24] Akari**
And then she'll become a USB insertion
pro with perfect accuracy!
**[09:27] Hime**
That's professional?! Really?!
**[09:28] Akari**
Yep.
**[09:29] Akari**
Then she start a company, and visit
other people with the same problem,
**[09:34] Akari**
and—bang, bang, bang—
jam those USB connections in!
**[09:36] Akari**
Mimi-chan will be creating
an all-new kind of business!
**[09:39] Hime**
That's awesome and sounds super cool!
**[09:42] Akari**
At the same time she can work
on training some new hires,
***SIGN*** USB Incorporated
**[09:44] ---**
and found an entire workforce
of genius USB experts!
**[09:46] Akari**
The business will grow with leaps and bounds,
and she'll get super rich!
**[09:49] Hime**
That's awesome! Bubble-style!
**[09:51] Akari**
And then Mimi-chan becomes super rich
and retires to a tropical island. Aloha!
**[09:54] Akari**
And there she lived a life never having to
worry about USB ports ever again. The end!
**[10:00] Hime**
I love it! What a great story!
**[10:02] Akari**
Isn't it, though?
**[10:04] Hime**
Yeah!
**[10:05] Akari**
You commit to meeting the needs
of an unfulfilled market segment.
**[10:07] Akari**
That's the iron rule of business!
**[10:09] Hime**
USB Dream!
**[10:11] Akari**
Yay!
**[10:13] Hime**
Dream catching Yay!
Playing the lotto! Bang, bang, bang!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[10:24] Hinata**
Where is that save point?!
**[10:33] Hinata**
If this keeps up...
**[10:35] ---**
I'll be in trouble.
**[10:38] Hinata**
The feeling of this bridge...
**[10:39] Hinata**
There's definitely a boss
battle on the other side!
**[10:41] Hinata**
Does that mean this is...
**[10:43] ---**
the last dungeon?!
**[10:45] Hinata**
Would it be a good idea to move onto
the boss battle without saving?
**[10:49] Hinata**
I'm not particularly good at the bullet
hell segments, so I tend to do poorly
**[10:51] ---**
on my first try with bosses.
**[10:53] Hinata**
You have to move your heart around...
**[10:55] Hinata**
Like this! And that! There!
**[10:57] Hinata**
I can do this!
**[10:59] Hinata**
I've got a slice of butterscotch-cinnamon pie,
along with other healing items...
**[11:04] Hinata**
I can do this!
**[11:06] Hinata**
Time to take this boss on!
**[11:14] Hinata**
I'm filled with determination
to fight this boss!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:21] Hinata**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[11:31] Shiro**
Oh, Pino-chan! Welcome!
**[11:35] Pino**
I am ever so fed up!
**[11:38] Pino**
Can I get some trivia about tai, please?
***SIGN*** Tai (Red Sea Bream)
**[11:46] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[11:47] Shiro**
Y'know, Japan is really the only
country to treat red sea bream as the
**[11:51] ---**
king of fish and a gourmet ingredient.
**[11:56] Pino**
I'm not quite full yet.
**[11:59] ---**
I could go for some more.
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:06] Shiro**
Well there's also Thai...
**[12:07] Shiro**
As in the country that is very popular
with Japanese tourists, Thailand.
***SIGN*** Bangkok
**[12:11] Shiro**
And though it's the capitol of Thailand,
**[12:13] ---**
did you know that Bangkok
isn't its official name?
**[12:16] Shiro**
Officially it's...
**[12:18] Shiro**
Krungthepmahanakhon Amonrattanakosin
Mahintharayutthaya
**[12:23] ---**
Mahadilokphop Noppharatratchathaniburirom
Udomratchaniwetmahasathan
**[12:28] ---**
Amonphimanawatansathit
Sakkathattiyawitsanukamprasit!
***SIGN*** Trivia Diner
**[12:35] Pino**
Wow, really?
**[12:37] Pino**
Your trivia really is always
so handy, Siro-oneechan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Nike
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[12:47] Nike**
Hiya! Nike here!
**[12:50] Nike**
Nice to meet you all.
**[12:53] Nike**
My favorite food is ramen combos.
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:03] Mito**
Now, then, I caught him earlier,
and he should be waking up any time now.
***SIGN*** Kenmochi Toya appeared!
**[13:11] Toya**
Class Prez! Why am I the
only one locked up here?!
**[13:14] Toya**
Everyone else said you just
asked them to appear normally!
**[13:16] Toya**
What did I do to earn this treatment?!
**[13:18] Mito**
Silence!
**[13:19] Mito**
You're joining me for the ultimate "Would
you rather" committee today, Kenmochi-san.
**[13:22] Mito**
Here's our subject!
**[13:24] Mito**
Which would you prefer?
**[13:26] Mito**
A) Being randomly shocked to the
point of mild pain once a day, or...
**[13:29] Mito**
B) To have your socks get
slightly soggy every day.
**[13:31] Toya**
Uh, I'd rather neither...
**[13:32] Toya**
I guess maybe B, having your
socks get soggy every day.
**[13:37] Mito**
That's what you'd prefer?
**[13:38] Toya**
I think so.
**[13:39] Toya**
I mean, if you get shocked once a day,
**[13:41] ---**
it'd be a real problem depending
on when it happens, right?
**[13:43] Mito**
What do you mean exactly?
**[13:45] Toya**
If you got shocked while using the bathroom,
you could end up splashing everywhere.
**[13:49] Mito**
I honestly would rather you
not have elaborated there.
**[13:53] Mito**
But I see what you mean.
**[13:55] Mito**
Like, say you're proposing.
**[13:57] Mito**
It could end up like, "I've always *augh*,"
which would definitely put a damper on things.
**[14:00] Toya**
Yes, exactly. That's what I'm thinking.
**[14:02] Mito**
That's a good point.
**[14:03] Mito**
But wouldn't it made your feet stink?
If your socks were a bit damp all the time.
**[14:07] Toya**
I guess they would.
**[14:07] Mito**
Right, and that would be terrible.
**[14:08] Toya**
But if it got to be bad, you could
always just take your socks off.
**[14:13] Mito**
Okay, then, Kenmochi-san,
take your socks off.
**[14:16] Mito**
Go ahead.
**[14:17] Toya**
Huh. Wha... My shoes... They won't come off.
**[14:20] Mito**
Isn't that the strangest thing?
**[14:22] Mito**
I can't imagine why!
**[14:23] Mito**
I wonder how much it would cost
to be able to take them off?
**[14:25] Mito**
Oh, look at the time! Okay, let's settle it.
**[14:28] Mito**
The answer is A). Receiving a random,
mildly painful shock once a day is preferable!
**[14:35] Toya**
I don't see the point of having
me on this segment!
**[14:37] Mito**
Silence!
**[14:38] Mito**
If you want to electrify
everyone else as a VTuber,
**[14:40] ---**
you had better be prepared
to be electrified yourself!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[14:47] Chaco**
Good evening everybody!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Batsuko
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[14:50] Chaco**
I'm Batsuko!
**[14:52] Chaco**
Here we go! Ready, and...
**[14:54] Chaco**
Batsuko pose!
**[15:03] Rin**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:07] Unity**
Unity-chan...
**[15:12] Unity**
Oh, poor Cinderella.
**[15:15] Unity**
I will make it so you are
fit to go to the ball!
**[15:19] Unity**
There!
**[15:21] Unity**
Now, your beauty will be unleashed!
**[15:25] Gori**
Hello!
**[15:28] Gori**
Is this where we're filming today?
**[15:30] Unity**
Y-You wanna eat some curry croquettes?
**[15:32] Gori**
I appreciate it.
**[15:34] Unity**
He ate it.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[15:39] Tatsumi**
This message goes out to the entire world.
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Fukuhara Tatsumi
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[15:41] Tatsumi**
My name is Fukuhara Tatsumi,
**[15:43] Tatsumi**
and I am a revolutionary
of the virtual world!
**[15:45] ---**
I am here to tell you all only one thing:
**[15:47] ---**
Put me in the anime!
**[15:49] ---**
That is all.
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[15:59] Elu**
Was someone else here?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:04] Kerin**
*What happened to me?*
**[16:06] Kerin**
* It looks like I've turned into*
* drifting particles of light.*
**[16:10] Kerin**
*I can't maintain my form.*
**[16:12] Kerin**
* And after I was finally*
* about to meet Elu-san...*
**[16:15] Hime**
Hey, Kerin! Where are you?
**[16:18] Hina**
Kerin!
**[16:19] Elu**
Hey, what is that white thing?
**[16:22] Hime**
Could it be?
**[16:24] Kerin**
*She's calling for me...*
**[16:25] Kerin**
*Elu-san is calling me!*
**[16:29] Hime**
Kerin's particles are shining!
**[16:31] Hime**
Elu-chan! Reach out and grab that light!
**[16:33] Elu**
Like this? Come on back!
**[16:38] Kerin**
I did it! I'm back!
**[16:41] Kerin**
Elu-san! Thank you so much!
**[16:43] Kerin**
Wait, where did Elu-san go?
**[16:46] Elu**
I-I'm over here.
**[16:48] Hina**
She's behind you, Kerin.
**[16:49] Kerin**
Unbelievable!
**[16:50] Kerin**
I finally regain physical form, but I
can't actually see Elu-san behind me?!
**[16:54] Hime**
Oh, it's because his layer is on top of hers!
**[16:56] Kerin**
I get it.
**[16:57] Kerin**
So it's actually "Kerin's Layer."
**[16:59] Hina**
This whole sketch has been a pun.
**[17:01] Elu**
Kerin-san, I'm Elu!
**[17:04] Kerin**
Elu-san! It's nice to meet you.
I'm Yamikumo Kerin, the dark elf!
**[17:09] Kerin**
Why?! Why can't I see Elu-san's face?!
**[17:12] Hime**
She's super cute!
**[17:14] Hina**
And super pretty!
**[17:16] Kerin**
Damn it! Quit hogging all the Elu-san!
**[17:20] Elu**
Kerin-san seems like a pleasant fellow!
**[17:22] Kerin**
This is such a perfect chance!
**[17:24] Kerin**
But I can't even see her!
**[17:26] Kerin**
If this forest can't help me...
It might as well burn!
**[17:31] Hina**
Don't tell me...
**[17:32] Kerin**
Ultimate Mega-Magic, Buchiflare!
**[17:35] Kerin**
I'm gonna blow it all up!
**[17:36] Hina**
Hime, you know what to do?
**[17:38] Hime**
Heck yeah!
**[17:39] Himehina**
In thy great name, we pledge
ourselves to darkness!
**[17:44] Himehina**
Let all the layers who stand
in our way be destroyed
**[17:47] Himehina**
by the power that we posses.
**[17:48] Himehina**
Kerin Slayer!
**[17:52] Kerin**
Huh? Huh? What the...?
**[17:55] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[17:56] Elu**
That's me!
**[17:58] Kerin**
I'm moved!
**[17:59] Kerin**
It's Elu-san, in the flesh!
**[18:01] Hime**
Sorry to interrupt your moment, but can
you do something about the missiles?
**[18:06] Kerin**
That's right!
**[18:07] Kerin**
At this rate, Elu-san and the
forest will be destroyed!
**[18:09] Hina**
We're here too!
**[18:11] Elu**
My forest is going to burn again.
**[18:13] Kerin**
I won't let that happen!
**[18:15] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[18:16] Hime & Hina**
Kerin!
**[18:23] Hime**
Elu-san... He sacrificed
himself to protect us!
**[18:31] Hina**
Elu-chan, putting that aside,
I'm feeling kind of thirsty.
**[18:34] Hime**
Oh, yeah, me too.
**[18:35] Hime**
You wanna go grab some banana shakes?
**[18:38] Hime**
We know a great place!
**[18:40] Hina**
Come on!
**[18:40] Elu**
Let's go!
**[18:42] Hina**
Y'know, bananas are vegetables!
**[18:43] Kerin**
Elu-san!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:55] Uma**
Sister, please, hear me out, Sister!
**[18:58] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:59] Uma**
The other day, I—
**[18:59] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:05] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:06] Sora**
I found a mini rice porridge at
the convenient store, so I bought it,
**[19:10] ---**
but when I tried to eat it at home,
it said it was for dogs.
**[19:13] Sora**
What a waste.
**[19:15] Sister**
Couldn't you have returned it?
**[19:17] Sora**
I already opened it before I noticed.
**[19:19] Sister**
I see.
**[19:21] Sister**
I suppose you'll have to eat it, then.
**[19:23] Sora**
Eat it?! But it's for dogs!
**[19:25] Sister**
Did you notice anything when you
looked at the back of the package?
**[19:29] Sora**
The back...? Wow,
it's really low in calories!
**[19:33] Sister**
Indeed.
**[19:34] Sister**
Maybe this is a stroke of fate,
**[19:36] ---**
and you could start a diet fad where
you eat rice porridge for dogs.
**[19:39] Sora**
But if it doesn't taste good...
**[19:42] Sister**
You could always write about
the experience in a book,
**[19:44] ---**
and if it's successful, then it will
be "delicious" in a different sense.
**[19:48] Sora**
I see!
**[19:49] Sora**
Then I'm gonna head to the convenience store
and buy a bunch of rice porridge for dogs!
**[19:54] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[19:57] Uma**
Virtual-kun wants to eat
porridge, too! Woof woof!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:05] Sister**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[20:09] Mito**
All right, we've got a letter here.
**[20:11] Mito**
It's from someone with the pen name "Upload."
**[20:13] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:16] Mito**
"You all upload a lot of videos yourselves,
but do you watch anyone else's videos?"
**[20:21] Mito**
"If there are any that made an impression,
please tell us about them."
**[20:24] Mito**
Well, everyone, do you
watch anyone else's videos?
**[20:28] Everyone**
Yeah!
**[20:29] Hime**
I watch lots!
**[20:30] Mito**
I see, then Hime-san,
which videos do you watch?
**[20:34] Hime**
Let's see. I watch ones where people sing...
**[20:37] Mito**
Ah, I see.
**[20:38] Hime**
Also, let's see, I also like short
sketches that are kinda zippy,
**[20:42] Hime**
the kind where you can watch a whole
bunch and scratch the right kind of itch.
**[20:47] Mito**
That sounds nice. Faster-paced
videos are great for comedy.
**[20:51] Hime**
Exactly! You can watch a ton like that.
**[20:53] Mito**
I think that from this anime, the Game Club
and Kerin-san fit that kind of description.
**[20:58] Akari**
Kerin-kun!
**[21:00] Akari**
Yeah, they've got a style
that's hard to match!
**[21:02] Mito**
True enough.
**[21:03] Hinata**
It's really creative.
**[21:05] Akari**
But y'know, one day, I'd like
to blow my house up too.
**[21:08] Hime**
Is that your dream?
**[21:09] Akari**
It totally is!
**[21:10] Shiro**
I can do it for you, if you'd like.
**[21:13] Akari**
Really? How about the day after tomorrow?
**[21:15] Hime**
It's a date!
**[21:17] Hina**
I want to see that!
**[21:20] Mito**
Okay, well, we're out of time!
**[21:23] Hime**
That was fast!
**[21:25] Hinata**
I want more!
**[21:25] Mito**
That's it for this week, so until next week!
**[21:29] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:11] Yoko**
Dunnananan! Yahoo, Akabane Yoko here!
***SIGN*** Akabane Yoko
**[23:14] Yoko**
It's the time of year
for good hot pot dishes.
**[23:16] Yoko**
Motsunabe, Korean hot pot, tonyu nabe...
They're all good, but I recommend kaki nabe.
**[23:21] Yoko**
Getting under the kotatsu and eating some kaki
nabe is a great way to warm up, you know?
**[23:25] Yoko**
You can get stomachaches sometimes, though.
**[23:27] Yoko**
Just be sure not to put anything
weird in the pot, okay?
**[23:30] Yoko**
Next time is "White Tears."
***SIGN*** Next Time
White Tears
**[23:32] Yoko**
Virtual-san will be looking next week, too!
# E8 - White Tears
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR79D02K6/white-tears)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Peanut**
They say Fukuzawa Yukichi was the first
guy to do college-style lectures in Japan.
**[00:05] Uma**
Okay, lecture me, Peanut-kun!
Three, two, one, go!
**[00:08] Peanut**
Like I'm gonna bother when you'll
just forget it, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:13] Hina**
Okay, are you ready?
**[00:15] Hina**
"Virtual-san is looking."
**[00:18] Shiro**
Looking...
**[00:20] Shiro**
*Looking For Love*, that musical!
*Looking for Love*...
**[00:25] Hime**
Oh, love...
**[00:27] Hime**
*Love or Money*!
**[00:29] Hime**
I think that's one!
**[00:31] Hime**
The movie *Love or Money*!
**[00:33] Mito**
Money... Money...
**[00:35] Mito**
*Money Train*? The movie.
**[00:40] Akari**
Train, huh? Movies that start with train...
**[00:43] Akari**
*How to Train Your Dragon*?
**[00:45] Akari**
Wait, no... *Training Day*! Yeah.
**[00:51] Hinata**
Day... Day... Day...
**[00:55] Hinata**
Day of the...?
**[01:03] Hinata**
*Day of the Dead* is a movie.
**[01:06] Hinata**
*Deadpool*!
**[01:14] Mito**
Ready, and..
**[01:16] Everybody**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:04] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:07] Mob A**
The only possible reason I can think of...
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 2
**[03:09] Mob A**
is them!
**[03:15] Hime**
Hey! Where are we?
**[03:17] Hina**
Everybody seems to have the same face...
**[03:19] Mito**
Are they actually even people?
**[03:21] Hinata**
Man, I am so tired.
**[03:24] Mob B**
That's...
***SIGN*** Mob B
**[03:25] Mob A**
Mirai Akari, Tanaka Hime, Suzuki Hina...
***SIGN*** Mob A
***SIGN*** Mob B
**[03:29] Mob B**
Tsukino Mito, Nekomiya Hinata, and...
**[03:33] Robo**
Cyber Girl... Siro.
**[03:37] Robo**
What are they doing here?!
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:40] Mob A**
I have no idea.
**[03:41] Mob A**
But ever since that TV show started airing,
they sometimes appear like this.
**[03:46] Robo**
That TV show...
**[03:49] Robo**
You people!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[03:54] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
***SIGN*** Utsureba kawaru, yo no narai.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Utsureba kawaru,
yo no narai
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:01] Grandma**
That's the phrase.
**[04:04] Grandma**
It refers to how the world
changes as time moves on.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:09] Grandma**
From the Showa to Heisei eras, one thing that
changed a lot is the electric appliance.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:14] Grandma**
We've moved from black and white
to color television,
**[04:17] Grandma**
air conditioning has made things
a lot more pleasant indoors,
**[04:22] Grandma**
and laundry machines have added
more and more features over time,
**[04:25] ---**
making that old chore so much simpler.
**[04:28] Grandma**
Now it's hard to imagine life
without something like a refrigerator.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:32] Grandma**
My family actually ran a butcher shop.
**[04:36] Grandma**
That meant having a fridge with a freezer,
which was revolutionary at the time.
**[04:41] Grandma**
See, having a freezer means you can
preserve meat for a lot longer,
**[04:46] ---**
which made for much better
turnaround for our product.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:50] ---**
That was quite remarkable, let me tell you.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:54] Grandma**
Incidentally, I think that being the child
of a butcher shop meant that I was the first
**[04:59] ---**
in my class to ever try sausage.
**[05:03] Grandma**
That's how long ago this was.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:05] Grandma**
That said, I'm fairly sure I'm the
first person in my class who has gone
**[05:11] ---**
on to become virtual, as well!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:13] Grandma**
Virtual Grandmother!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:24] Peanut**
The crunchiest virtual Youtuber, Peanut-kun!
**[05:29] Peanut**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[05:37] Akari**
I really thought we were toast!
**[05:39] Akari**
It's so good to be alive!
**[05:42] Mito**
That aside, space certainly
is mysterious, isn't it?
**[05:44] Hime**
Space?
**[05:45] Mito**
Yes.
**[05:46] Mito**
When you think about all the mysteries
humanity has yet to solve out there,
**[05:49] ---**
doesn't it just thrill you?
**[05:50] Hinata**
Oh, I get you!
**[05:52] Hinata**
Becoming a space pirate and going
on an adventure sounds good to me.
**[05:55] Shiro**
I want to boldly go where
no man has gone before!
**[06:04] Hinata**
That scared me... huh?!
**[06:05] Hinata**
Is it just me or did something happen outside?
**[06:08] Shiro**
Space?!
**[06:10] Hinata**
Look, everybody! Something's headed our way!
**[06:14] Mito**
Is it some kind of cosmic mystery?!
**[06:15] Peanuts**
Here I come!
**[06:18] Everybody**
You again?!
**[06:20] Hime**
Why are you coming straight at us?!
**[06:23] Akari**
Everybody! Let's come up with a plan, quick!
**[06:25] Akari**
Or he's going to get us again!
**[06:30] Hinata**
That laugh...
**[06:31] Hinata**
It's Meteoric Peanut-kun!
**[06:32] Shiro**
In that case, why don't
we try flattering him?
**[06:35] Shiro**
Peanut is always a pushover!
**[06:37] Akari**
Makes sense, so we just
have to complement him!
**[06:39] Shiro**
Take it away, then, Akari-chan!
**[06:40] Akari**
Seriously?!
**[06:41] Akari**
Uh, you're handsome, in a
lower mid-tier kind of way!
**[06:44] Hime**
And uh, I really want to wear
those cool underwear you have!
**[06:46] Hina**
Your hair's so stylish, too!
**[06:47] Hinata**
And you're so yellow! Yellow is good!
**[06:49] Mito**
Really, it's just so impressive how the,
uh, the color of your nipples is so vivid.
**[06:54] Shiro**
Hey, he's not stopping at all!
**[06:55] Shiro**
You want me to rip your damn
briefs off, you cocky nut?!
**[06:59] Mito**
N-Now I have to block up before
we get booted off the air!
**[07:01] Siro**
Tee-hee, that just slipped out!
**[07:03] Hinata**
We're done for!
**[07:07] Peanut**
Here I come!
**[07:11] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:13] Everybody**
Hello!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[07:17] Hinata**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[07:24] Aoi**
Gori-chan...
**[07:25] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:26] Aoi**
How you been?
**[07:27] Gori**
Having fun, I'd say.
**[07:28] Aoi**
And that's the problem!
**[07:29] Gori**
What brought this on?
**[07:30] Aoi**
There's nothing fun about the fact that
Fuji Aoi Park might end up closing!
**[07:34] Gori**
This park is actually a business?
**[07:36] Aoi**
That's right! How did you not notice?!
**[07:38] Gori**
I-I'm sorry.
**[07:40] Aoi**
That being the case, Gori-chan,
can I lay you off?
**[07:42] Gori**
I had a job here?!
**[07:45] Aoi**
I happened to get my hands on a
younger, cuter, sexier employee.
**[07:50] Gori**
You already hired my replacement?!
**[07:52] Pink**
Hello there, I'm a pink gorilla.
**[07:54] Gori**
My own sister?!
**[07:55] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:57] Gori**
Hello!
**[08:00] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[08:05] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[08:13] Akari**
What's wrong, Hime?
**[08:15] Hime**
Akari-chan! We've got really big trouble!
**[08:17] Akari**
And what is it this time?
**[08:19] Hime**
Someone with the pen name
"Takahashi-kun" is in trouble!
**[08:22] Hime**
Here, ready this and help them!
**[08:24] Hime**
Go!
**[08:25] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san."
**[08:27] Hime**
H'lo.
**[08:27] Akari**
Hello.
**[08:28] Akari**
"My boss at work always hits the enter
key as loudly as he possibly can."
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[08:33] Akari**
"It's so distracting,
I can't focus on my work!"
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[08:35] Akari**
"What should I do?"
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[08:37] Akari**
I see, I see.
***SIGN*** Problem: Boss hits enter really noisily
**[08:37] Hime**
It's textual harassment, huh?
**[08:40] Hime**
That's what it is.
**[08:41] Akari**
I know what they mean, though.
**[08:42] Akari**
Sometimes you get distracted when
you hear that really loud "clack"!
**[08:44] Hime**
It's always louder than you think, too.
**[08:45] Akari**
Yep. But y'know, it feels good to do.
**[08:48] Hime**
I don't know why, but it's
really exhilarating.
**[08:49] Mirai**
Crazily so!
**[08:51] Hime**
Clack! Finished!
**[08:53] Akari**
It really does gives you a
sense of finishing something.
**[08:56] Akari**
Maybe because it's so big?
The actual key on the keyboard, I mean.
**[08:58] Hime**
The enter key.
**[08:59] Akari**
Yeah, the enter key.
**[09:00] Akari**
But I can understand how
Takahashi-kun would, y'know?
**[09:03] Akari**
Want to ask his boss to stop
smashing that enter key,
**[09:06] Akari**
but considering it's his boss,
it's hard to bring up.
**[09:09] Hime**
Yep, yep, yep.
**[09:10] Akari**
What to do?
**[09:12] Hime**
Hey, Mirai-san?
**[09:15] ---**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:17] Hikari**
Everyone has their odd habits,
so I think you should just try to bear it.
**[09:22] Yami**
That's messed up!
**[09:23] Yami**
The other guy's at fault.
Might as well come out and say it!
**[09:26] Hikari**
But it's his boss.
**[09:29] Hikari**
It could have a bad affect
on their relationship.
**[09:32] Yami**
God, you're so old fashioned.
**[09:34] Yami**
Coddling the entrenched powers
that be like that is exactly what
**[09:36] ---**
breeds so much harassment.
**[09:39] Hikari**
I guess you have a point, but...
**[09:42] Yami**
I figure push comes to shove, you rip
the enter key off their keyboard.
**[09:47] Hikari**
Wouldn't that be a kind of harassment, too?
**[09:51] Hikari**
Akari, you make the final call!
**[09:54] Hime**
Hello? Earth to Mirai-san!
**[09:59] Akari**
Sorry!
**[10:00] Akari**
I'm finally back.
**[10:02] Hime**
Welcome home.
**[10:03] Akari**
Right!
**[10:05] Akari**
Now, pen name Takahashi-kun!
I'm gonna get to the bottom line!
**[10:09] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
**[10:11] Hime**
Her bottom... line?
**[10:13] Akari**
You need to encourage your boss!
**[10:16] Hime**
Encourage them?
**[10:17] Hime**
Then is he giving up on this enter key stuff?
**[10:19] Akari**
Not exactly!
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[10:21] Akari**
First, you listen out for the
moment they smash that enter key.
**[10:25] Akari**
Then, right when they do it, you shout out!
**[10:29] Akari**
"Nice enter!"
***SIGN*** Nice enter!!
**[10:30] Hime**
I like it!
**[10:32] Akari**
The important thing is being consistent!
**[10:33] Akari**
Never miss any time that
they smash that enter key,
**[10:37] Akari**
and the second you do it's,
"Nice enter! The best in Japan!"
**[10:41] Akari**
"That's why they call you 'Mr. Enter'!'"
**[10:43] Hime**
That sounds like fun!
**[10:45] Akari**
By doing that, since it's just encouragement,
it won't be taken the wrong way.
**[10:49] Akari**
But wouldn't the boss get embarrassed by all
that fuss just from hitting the enter key?
**[10:53] Hime**
You've got a point!
**[10:54] Akari**
Right?!
**[10:55] Hime**
It'd be obvious!
**[10:55] Akari**
It would!
**[10:56] Hime**
It'd be obvious!
**[10:57] Akari**
Totally obvious!
**[10:58] Akari**
So, in order to make sure Takahashi-kun
doesn't cheer him on,
**[11:01] Akari**
his boss will start to
press the enter key gently!
**[11:04] Hime**
That's super awesome! You are so smart!
**[11:07] Akari**
That's what it takes to make it in society!
**[11:11] Hime**
Super Miracle Enter Key Man!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:21] Hinata**
Time to build, time to build!
**[11:29] Hinata**
What should I do?
**[11:31] Hinata**
If I use blocks to create a
new park in this vacant lot,
**[11:36] Hinata**
how exactly should I do it?
**[11:39] Hinata**
Like this!
**[11:45] Hinata**
Why, would you look at that?
**[11:47] Hinata**
Those scattered piles of sand are now laid
out as lovely as a rock garden in Kyoto!
**[11:54] Hinata**
The big pipes that conveyed nothing
**[11:57] ---**
but Gianism are now laid out like
the stage for a glamorous idol.
**[12:00] Hinata**
And the lumpy, dangerous ground is now flat.
**[12:04] Hinata**
A skillful hand has transformed his typical
empty lot into a soothing park space.
**[12:18] Hinata**
I hope people call me skillful some day!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[12:25] Mito**
Rise! Attention! Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:33] Shiro**
Oh, it's Tokino Sora-chan! Welcome!
**[12:37] Kaede**
Gosh, I am so fed up!
**[12:40] Miria**
Can I get some trivia about sushi, please?
**[12:43] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:50] Shiro**
Now, sushi...
***SIGN*** Sushi
***SIGN*** Sushi has a long history, and has been known to exist since the Nara period.
***SIGN*** The hand-formed style became popular in the Edo period,
**[13:02] ---**
when it was called Edomae sushi,
and sold in carts all over old Tokyo.
***SIGN*** When you think about how people from the time would casually stop by a cart
***SIGN*** to stand around eating sushi, you could even call it Edo period fast food!
***SIGN*** At the time, sushi tended to be as big as rice balls,
***SIGN*** Edo Period
***SIGN*** Modern Day
**[13:16] ---**
and since that made it hard
to eat with chopsticks,
***SIGN*** it was instead eaten by hand, which is a custom that continues to this day.
***SIGN*** Also, in sushi jargon, wasabi is called "namida" because if it's spicy enough,
**[13:26] ---**
it can bring you to tears (namida).
**[13:31] Miria**
Wow, I had no idea!
**[13:33] Miria**
Your trivia really is always
so handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Shirogumi-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[13:43] Shirogumi**
The time has come!
**[13:45] Shirogumi**
My name is "Watanabe Suzume."
**[13:48] Shirogumi**
Also known as Grisaille IV.
**[13:51] Shirogumi**
Let the depths of my sorcery
teach you true fear.
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:59] Mito**
I wonder if Kaede-chan has
been watching Kerin Slayer.
**[14:05] Kaede**
Burn down the dark elf's forest!
**[14:08] Mito**
You are so impressionable.
**[14:10] Kaede**
You think elves and dark elves
live in different forests?
**[14:13] Mito**
Elves aren't human anyway,
so who cares where they live?
**[14:16] Kaede**
You got a point there!
**[14:17] Mito**
Anyway, Kaede-chan, let's get on with the
ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[14:20] Kaede**
Right!
**[14:20] Mito**
Here is our subject for today!
**[14:23] Mito**
Which would you rather be?
**[14:24] Mito**
A) Immortal, but having
to take exams every year.
**[14:28] Mito**
B) Have five years to live, but be rich
enough that you can do whatever you want.
**[14:31] Kaede**
Oh, B for me, easy.
**[14:33] Mito**
Really?
**[14:34] Kaede**
Well if you know exactly what kind of time
you've got, you can spend all of it having fun.
**[14:38] Mito**
You'd die in five years!
Is that what you want?
**[14:40] Kaede**
Sure.
**[14:40] Mito**
Come on, quit sounding so suicidal!
**[14:42] Mito**
Don't give up! Live your life!
**[14:45] Kaede**
What about you, Mito-chan?
**[14:45] Mito**
I think I would live my immortal life,
even if every year was exams.
**[14:49] Kaede**
Why?!
**[14:50] Mito**
Well, all you really need to
do is fail every year, right?
**[14:52] Mito**
You could repeat the same
grade, like, 1,030 times.
**[14:54] Mito**
Wouldn't that be fine?
**[14:56] Higuchi**
That could be a Guinness World Record!
**[14:57] Mito**
That sounds good to me.
**[14:59] Kaede**
But you gotta keep living no matter
how badly hurt or sad you get, then.
**[15:03] Mito**
Kaede-chan, is life really just
injuries and sadness for you?
**[15:07] Kaede**
Well, I mean, isn't life mostly
just depressing stuff?
**[15:11] Mito**
To what degree?
**[15:13] Kaede**
Eighty percent...
**[15:13] Mito**
Eighty percent?! It's that bad?!
**[15:15] Kaede**
Well, I guess, to have a fun life,
**[15:17] Kaede**
you've gotta work hard from every day, right?
**[15:19] Mito**
Okay, stop trying to sound profound!
**[15:22] Mito**
This whole bit has me trying
to do that as the final line!
**[15:24] Kaede**
My bad!
**[15:26] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[15:27] Kaede**
Right.
**[15:27] Mito**
So here's the answer...
**[15:29] Mito**
A) Being immortal and every
year being an exam year!
**[15:34] Kaede**
That don't seem like it'd suck to you?
**[15:35] Mito**
Can you imagine the kind of subscriber
counts you'd rack up if you were immortal?!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[15:43] Kaede**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[15:44] Kaede**
Kaederon!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:48] Unity**
Unity-chan...
**[15:51] Unity**
Hey! Today I'm here to solve your problems,
and I'm on a roll!
**[15:54] Unity**
Let's take a call right now. Hello?
**[15:58] Caller**
*Hello.*
**[15:59] Unity**
What can I help you with today?
**[16:01] Caller**
*Well, I'm kind of nervous about something.*
**[16:04] Unity**
Mmhm!
**[16:04] Caller**
* I keep getting this feeling*
* something is in my room.*
**[16:07] Caller**
*Like someone is watching me all the time.*
**[16:12] Unity**
And have you talked to the police?
**[16:13] Caller**
*Well... that seems a bit extreme.*
**[16:15] Narrator**
*Did you notice that?*
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Hoshikawa Sora
**[16:19] Chaco**
People of Earth, nice to meet you!
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:23] Chaco**
I am the virtual alien idol, Hoshikawa Sora!
**[16:27] Chaco**
Virtual-san is looking again, today!
**[16:31] Chaco**
See you around!
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:46] Hina**
Hime, why are we up in the mountains?
**[16:49] ---**
It's so cold!
**[16:51] Hime**
I heard a rumor that Kerin
was recuperating up here!
**[16:55] Hina**
He's still alive?!
**[16:57] Hime**
Well, I feel kinda bad about what happened,
**[17:00] Hime**
so I figured I'd bring this to make amends.
**[17:02] Hina**
Hey, it's a picture of Elu-san!
**[17:07] Hime**
I figure if we find him, I can hand it over.
**[17:10] Hina**
You're such a sweetheart, Hime-san!
**[17:12] Kerin**
What's all the noise?
**[17:15] Kerin**
You two again?!
**[17:17] Hina**
Oh, there he is.
**[17:18] Hina**
Hi there, remember us?
**[17:20] Hina**
It's Hime and Hina, the Kerin Slayers.
**[17:23] Kerin**
I remember every last detail!
**[17:25] Kerin**
You two got in the way
of Elu-san and my love!
**[17:30] Hime & Hina**
Love?
**[17:31] Kerin**
Suck on this, you two!
**[17:32] Hime**
Wait, wait, wait! Just hear me out!
**[17:35] Kerin**
I don't want to hear your excuses!
**[17:36] Hina**
Th-This is bad! If those detonate,
it'll cause an avalanche,
**[17:39] Hina**
and then the bears will be in trouble!
**[17:42] ---**
Take this! Ancient Magic: Missile De'Fleckt!
**[17:46] Kerin**
What?! My missile...
**[17:54] Hime**
Hey, something got hit.
**[17:56] ---**
Was it some birdies?
**[17:57] Hime**
Sorry!
**[17:59] Hina**
The birdies!
**[18:01] Kerin**
How dare you deflect my missile!
**[18:03] Kerin**
Keblins!
**[18:06] Hime**
So many Keblins!
**[18:12] Hime**
Wait, wait! One of you just
said kebab! I'm positive.
**[18:15] Hina**
Wow, I could go for kebabs.
**[18:17] Hime**
Same.
**[18:17] Hina**
But, wow, this is bad!
**[18:19] Kerin**
Farewell, little girls!
**[18:21] Kerin**
Now, swarm them!
**[18:23] Hime & Hina**
No!
**[18:26] Game Club**
Hold it right there!
**[18:27] Everyone**
Who's that?!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:38] Uma**
Can I ask you about something, Sister?
**[18:41] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:42] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[18:43] Uma**
Well, I—
**[18:50] Sister**
What is it?
**[18:51] Sora**
I hate doing my makeup when I have days off!
Not to mention, I'm not a morning person,
**[18:54] Sora**
so sometimes I go out without any.
**[18:56] Sora**
I'd be embarrassed to run
into someone I know,
**[18:59] Sora**
but to be honest, it feels like
more trouble than it's worth.
**[19:01] Sister**
I can understand why you'd feel that way.
**[19:03] Sister**
It might be a better idea
to take the time to do it.
**[19:07] Sora**
I know, right?
**[19:08] Sora**
What do you think might help?
**[19:10] Sister**
Perhaps you could put on one of
the masks that wrestlers wear.
**[19:14] Sora**
Like a masked wrestler?!
**[19:16] Sister**
If you go out looking like a masked
wrestler in their private life,
**[19:18] ---**
I'm sure your friends won't recognize you.
**[19:21] Sora**
I get the feeling people
might ask me what I do for a living.
**[19:24] Sister**
In that case, maybe you could
wear one of those horse masks.
**[19:27] Sister**
That certainly isn't an
odd sight in this town.
**[19:32] Sora**
Oh, yeah! I think I saw one
of those just the other day!
**[19:35] Sora**
I'll try it!
**[19:38] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[19:40] Uma**
Be careful about getting enough air
when summer rolls around, though!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:48] Uma**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[19:50] Uma**
Neiiiigh!
**[19:53] Akari**
Okay, we've got a letter here.
**[19:56] Akari**
It's from someone with the
pen name "Eternal Blizzard."
**[19:59] Everybody**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:02] Akari**
"Don't you think that
titles are really cool?"
**[20:05] Akari**
"I really do!"
**[20:06] Akari**
"If you all could add titles to your names,
what would they be like? Please tell me!"
***SIGN*** Coming up with titles!
**[20:13] Everybody**
Titles, huh...
**[20:14] Shiro**
I think Akari-chan's should include
her favorite article of clothing...
**[20:17] Shiro**
The one down there.
**[20:20] Akari**
You mean the v-shaped thing?
**[20:21] Hime**
V-shaped!
**[20:23] Akari**
I actually have one I came up with, though!
**[20:25] Hime**
No way!
**[20:27] Akari**
My title would be...
**[20:31] Akari**
"The Walking Free Directory!"
**[20:32] Mito**
Oh, wow!
***SIGN*** They discussed it for about 20 minutes,
so let's cut straight to the titles!
**[20:38] Akari**
Then I'll just be The Walking PK.
***SIGN*** Walking PK
(Panty-Krammed)
**[20:40] Hime**
I like that!
**[20:41] Mito**
PK!
**[20:42] Shiro**
The Bloody Beautiful White...
***SIGN*** The Bloody Beautiful White Dolphinch
**[20:44] Hina**
Dolphinch!
**[20:45] Mito**
Dolphinch?
**[20:47] Shiro**
Emergency Chuckle 119.
***SIGN*** Emergency Chuckle 119
**[20:48] Hime**
Oh, like the phone number!
**[20:51] Hime**
The Navely Venus Otaku Freak.
***SIGN*** The Navely Venus Otaku Freak
**[20:52] Mito**
Navely Venus Otaku Freak?
**[20:55] Shiro**
The Weed-Eating Human
Centipede High Schooler.
***SIGN*** The Weed-Eating
Human Centipede High Schooler
**[20:59] Hime**
The Fluffy Pink Renegade.
***SIGN*** The Fluffy Pink Renegade
**[21:00] Mito**
The Fluffy Pink Renegade!
That's got a nice rhythm to it!
**[21:03] Akari**
Let's wrap it up by sounding off!
**[21:05] Akari**
This has been brought to you
by the Walking PK, Mirai Akari!
**[21:09] Shiro**
The Bloody Beautiful White Dolphinch,
Cyber Girl Siro!
**[21:13] Hime**
The Emergency Chuckle 119, Tanaka Hime!
**[21:15] Hina**
The Navely Venus Otaku Freak, Suzuki Hina!
**[21:18] Mito**
The Weed-Eating Human Centipede
High Schooler, Tsukino Mito!
**[21:21] Hinata**
And the Fluffy Pink Renegade,
Nekomiya Hinata!
**[21:25] Akari**
That does it for this time!
So until next week,
**[21:29] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Tsukiyo Sora
**[23:09] Tsukiyo & Sora**
Hello there everyone, I'm Tsukiyo Sora.
**[23:11] Tsukiyo & Sora**
Muscle strain is the flavor of youth,
**[23:13] Tsukiyo & Sora**
menthol is the smell of first love,
**[23:14] Tsukiyo & Sora**
and my legs carried me to a warm café
where I made some harsh-tasting memories,
**[23:18] Tsukiyo & Sora**
but in the evening they all became
bittersweet memorial events.
**[23:21] Tsukiyo & Sora**
As things are, this virtual space
might be the embodiment of my
**[23:24] ---**
youthful days that will
never fade, even as I age.
**[23:27] Tsukiyo & Sora**
You're not sure what I mean?
**[23:29] ---**
I'm not too sure myself.
**[23:30] ---**
But there's one thing I know that
I'm supposed to say, so here goes.
**[23:33] ---**
Next time is "Transmigration
of an Old Lady's Soul."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"Transmigration of an Old Lady's Soul"
**[23:36] ---**
Virtual-san will be looking again next week.
# E9 - Transmigration of an Old Lady's Soul
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6G573VP6/transmigration-of-an-old-ladys-soul)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] Unity**
There!
**[00:00] Unity**
There!
**[00:02] Peanuts**
They say the one yen coin costs
more than one yen to make, y'know.
**[00:05] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey! So how much
does it cost to make Peanut?
**[00:07] Peanuts**
Are you asking about my body?
**[00:08] ---**
That's getting way too personal,
you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey hey!
**[00:14] Shiro**
Hey everybody! Let's play the V.V. game!
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[00:17] Hime**
Yeah, the V.V. game!
**[00:19] Everybody**
Yeah! V.V.! V.V.! Yay!
**[00:24] Shiro**
All right, here we go!
**[00:26] Shiro**
Ready and... Virtual-san!
**[00:29] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:30] Hinata**
Crowd of one!
**[00:31] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:33] Hinata**
Virtual-san!
**[00:34] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:35] Hime**
Crowd of two!
**[00:36] Everyone**
Everyone: V.V.!
**[00:37] Hime**
Virtual-san, the horse!
**[00:38] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:40] Akari**
Team of three!
**[00:41] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:42] Hina**
Huh, wait a second, just wait a second.
**[00:44] Hina**
Why does Virtual-san make it a team?
**[00:47] Mito**
True, he is shaped like a human.
**[00:49] Akari**
Come on, he's a horse!
**[00:51] Shiro**
Good point. I'm not sure which it is.
**[00:53] Shiro**
Let me call him real quick.
**[00:58] Shiro**
Answer the phone, horse. Come on already.
**[01:01] Akari**
I bet he counts as a horse!
**[01:03] Shiro**
Oh, hey, horse?
**[01:05] Uma**
*Hey, hey!*
**[01:06] Shiro**
Do we count you as a person, or a horse?
**[01:10] Uma**
* I'm a horse-faced human, so I*
* count as human! Hey, hey, hey—*
**[01:15] Shiro**
Apparently, he's human.
**[01:16] Akari**
Damn it! That horsey bastard!
**[01:20] Mito**
Well, since Akari-san got it wrong,
**[01:21] ---**
she has to pretend to be Virtual-san
when we do the title call this week.
**[01:25] Akari**
Do I have to?
**[01:27] Shiro**
In that case, let's get to it! Ready, and...
**[01:31] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[01:33] Akari**
Hey, hey!
**[03:20] Miria**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:21] Miria**
Yay!
***SIGN*** Mob C
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 3
**[03:24] Mob C**
Where did you come from?
**[03:26] Hime**
Where *did* we come from?
**[03:28] Hina**
Hmm, not sure!
**[03:30] Mito**
More importantly, is there something
we can help you all with?
**[03:33] Mob C**
Of course there is! We're here
to remove you by force!
***SIGN*** Mob C
**[03:37] Shiro**
By force?
**[03:39] Hinata**
Remove?
**[03:40] Akari**
Oh, gosh. Here, where everyone can see?
**[03:43] Mito**
I think you might be
imagining the wrong thing.
**[03:46] Mob C**
Listen up! When I heard that you six Vtubers
were going to have a crossover on TV,
**[03:51] ---**
I was really hyped about it!
***SIGN*** Mob D
**[03:55] Mob C**
But then we saw something that
totally defied our expectations!
**[03:57] Mob E**
It was like something from another dimension!
***SIGN*** Mob E
**[04:01] Hime**
Yeah, I get that.
**[04:02] Hina**
Not sure what you expect
us to do about it, though.
**[04:05] Mob C**
And now, you're here!
***SIGN*** Mob C
**[04:08] Mob Group**
That can't be allowed!
**[04:11] Mito**
Hey, wait—!
**[04:11] Akari**
No!
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[04:15] Mob A**
Hey! What are you doing?!
**[04:17] Robo**
I don't know, but I can't let this happen!
**[04:23] Robo**
Did I just jump?
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Virtual Kerin Slayer Wars.
**[04:38] Hime**
That was a close one!
**[04:40] Hime**
The Keblins all got smashed!
**[04:42] Hina**
But by who?! And why?
**[04:44] Kerin**
You people!
**[04:45] Kerin**
You would dare harm my darling Keblins?
Identify yourselves!
**[04:49] Kaede**
We are the Game Club!
**[04:50] Kaede**
An empire that has destroyed countless virtual
countries in pursuit of a unified galaxy!
**[04:54] Haruto**
That's the idea, but...
**[04:56] Haruto**
Chief, we can't move!
**[04:58] Ryo**
They're so heavy, and they won't come off.
**[05:00] Ryo**
Must be all the gravity.
**[05:03] Miria**
I'm stuck!
**[05:06] Kerin**
You think this is a joke!?
**[05:07] Hina**
Hey, why did you all crash
here in those things?
**[05:12] Kaede**
Well, we were on our ship having a
meeting about conquering the universe,
**[05:17] Kaede**
but then a missile hit us out of nowhere.
**[05:19] Miria**
That's right. It hit us out of the blue,
and we had to put on these suits to escape.
**[05:24] Hime**
Kerin-kun...
**[05:25] Ryo**
And then we got pulled in
by this planet's gravity.
**[05:29] Haruto**
And there you have it!
**[05:30] Haruto**
I'm just glad that no one seems to be hurt.
**[05:33] Hina**
Huh, he seems pretty nice.
**[05:35] Hime**
Hey, Kerin! That was your missile, dude!
**[05:38] Kerin**
Uh... well... I don't know what to say.
**[05:41] Miria**
You're the one who shot that missile at us?!
**[05:43] Haruto**
You have some nerve,
picking a fight with our Game Club!
**[05:46] Ryo**
You hit us, we hit back... and then some!
**[05:49] Haruto**
Exactly!
**[05:50] Haruto**
We will pool our powers to strike you down!
**[05:53] Haruto**
Won't we?!
**[05:56] Hime**
One of them has a real obnoxious laugh.
**[05:58] Hina**
So do you, though.
**[05:59] Haruto**
You there, what's with that pink hair?!
**[06:01] Haruto**
It's like... a pink fool!
**[06:04] Miria**
Shut up Harutrash! That girl's cute!
**[06:07] Miria**
I get the feeling we'd get along!
**[06:08] Miria**
Hi there! I'm Miria.
**[06:10] Hime**
Miria-chan! Nice to meet you,
I'm Chuckling Pink, Hime!
**[06:13] Kaede**
Everyone, listen!
**[06:14] Kaede**
Our main problem right now is
finding a way out of these suits!
**[06:17] Ryo**
Good point...
**[06:18] Kaede**
You're Kerin-kun, right?
**[06:20] Kerin**
Yes, Yamikumo Kerin.
**[06:22] Kaede**
Help us figure a way out!
**[06:24] Kerin**
Certainly!
**[06:24] Hime**
Last time, didn't we have to spam
a bunch of lightning to fix it?
**[06:29] Hime**
So what now?
**[06:31] Hina**
Should I call the thunder?
**[06:32] Kerin**
You shouldn't!
**[06:33] Kaede**
Well, we can move a little bit.
Maybe we should run into each other?
**[06:37] Ryo**
Good idea, chief!
**[06:38] Ryo**
Since they have the same mass, maybe a
collision will cause them to be obliterated!
**[06:42] Miria**
Okay, Harutrash, let's try it out!
**[06:44] Haruto**
Wait, you pink fool!
**[06:45] Haruto**
We should run some more numbers first—
**[06:48] Miria**
Ow! That didn't work.
**[06:51] Kaede**
All it did was hurt you.
**[06:53] Hina**
I think I see a crack, though?
**[06:56] Hime**
I know! I've got just the thing!
**[06:58] Hime**
I call it, "Bowling with the Game Club!"
**[07:02] Miria**
Bowling?
**[07:03] Hime**
First, we line Miria-chan and
the others up like this.
**[07:06] Ryo**
What's the idea here?
**[07:07] Kaede**
Let's follow Hime-chan's
instructions for now.
**[07:10] Hime**
All right, everything's set!
**[07:12] Hime**
Kerin, send that other one
this way! Just roll him over!
**[07:15] Kerin**
Got it!
**[07:16] Haruto**
What?! Human bowling?!
**[07:19] Haruto**
Chuckling Pink, what kind
of plan is this?!
**[07:22] Kerin**
Gonna smash em all!
**[07:26] Hime**
Yay! Strike!
**[07:28] Hina**
They got out, but it definitely wasn't easy.
**[07:31] Kaede**
Ow, ow, ow... Is everyone okay?
**[07:34] Miria**
I might be in shock.
**[07:35] Ryo**
I think I'm fine.
**[07:36] Haruto**
You'll pay for this, Chuckling Pink!
**[07:39] Hime**
You got some kind of beef with me,
Harutrash?! You wanna become space debris?
**[07:42] Hina**
Yeah, Harutrash!
You wanna go in the shredder?
**[07:45] Haruto**
You people...
**[07:47] Haruto**
Very well, then! I'm gonna blow you all up!
**[08:06] Kerin**
Um... Are we going to
continue Kerin Slayer?
**[08:10] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
**[08:18] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[08:21] Grandma**
Banbutsu ruten.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Banbutsu ruten
**[08:24] Banner**
That's the phrase.
**[08:27] G**
It refers to how everything in
the world is always changing.
**[08:31] G**
Think about how much, and in how many
different ways, music has changed.
**[08:37] G**
Nowadays you can watch music videos
legally for free online, right?
**[08:42] G**
But in the old days, you were limited
to records, radio, and TV for music.
**[08:48] G**
Even in the case of records,
it's not like everyone owned a player.
**[08:53] G**
I imagine the majority were getting
their music from radio and TV.
**[08:58] G**
I was no exception, of course.
**[08:59] G**
Back then, I had this impulse
to want to learn a lot of songs,
**[09:02] G**
so I would be listening to the radio,
focusing on the lyrics and writing them down.
**[09:08] G**
Usually three or four times was enough was
enough for me to have the entire song down,
**[09:12] G**
and by then I'd usually have
the melody memorized, too.
**[09:16] G**
Now that I think about it,
the way you can just look up
**[09:18] ---**
lyrics online is one of the things
that's remarkable about our modern age.
**[09:23] G**
It goes to show that things
are always changing.
**[09:26] G**
All things continue to turn,
and turn, and turn!
**[09:31] G**
Round and around and around!
**[09:34] G**
Round and around it goes!
**[09:36] G**
Around it goes!
**[09:51] G**
Grandma is looking.
**[09:55] Hime & Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[10:03] Aoi**
How do you think we can get more visitors?
**[10:06] Gori**
That's a good question.
**[10:08] Aoi**
Do you have any friends
we could ask to come over?
**[10:11] Gori**
Friends of mine?
**[10:12] Aoi**
Yeah, the kind that might attract a crowd!
**[10:14] ---**
That could net us some visitors!
**[10:15] Aoi**
Like Nekomiya Hinata-chan!
**[10:18] Gori**
I think she's probably too
busy with video games.
**[10:20] Aoi**
What about Tsukino Mito-chan?
**[10:23] Gori**
I get the feeling she'd eat all our grass,
so that's probably a bad idea.
**[10:28] Aoi**
Come on, there has to be somebody!
**[10:30] Gori**
I know just the person!
**[10:31] Aoi**
Who is it?!
**[10:32] Gori**
Virtual-san.
**[10:34] Aoi**
You really think that's a good idea?
**[10:36] Gori**
Now that you mention it... sure enough.
**[10:38] Uma**
Aoi-chan! I'm here already!
**[10:41] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[10:43] Gori**
Hello!
**[10:46] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[10:51] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[11:03] Hime**
That's Mirai Akari's Morse code!
**[11:05] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's really big trouble!
**[11:09] Akari**
Wait, what?
**[11:11] Hime**
So you can talk!
**[11:13] Hime**
Well, pen name "Tom-kun" is in trouble!
**[11:15] Hime**
So seriously, ready this already,
please! Beep, beep, beep...
**[11:17] Akari**
Sure, okay, beep beep beep.
**[11:19] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san."
**[11:20] Hime**
H'lo!
**[11:20] Akari**
Hello there.
**[11:22] Akari**
"I love watching stuff on YouTube!"
**[11:24] Hime**
Oh, nice!
**[11:25] Akari**
"But lately I've had the problem where
once I start watching it, I can't stop."
**[11:29] Akari**
"I start watching it when I go to bed,
and before I notice it, it's already morning."
**[11:33] Akari**
"When I spend that much time watching videos,
**[11:34] ---**
it makes me wonder if I could be
using that time more effectively?"
**[11:37] Akari**
And then I start to feel guilty."
**[11:39] Hime**
I get that! I totally get that!
***SIGN*** Problem: Unable to stop watching YouTube
**[11:41] Akari**
If you have Autoplay on, you tend
to end up watching what's up next!
**[11:45] Hime**
Yeah, yeah!
**[11:46] Akari**
Well, let's see, then. It's great
to enjoy watching YouTube,
**[11:50] Akari**
but Tom-kun feels bad about
staying up all night to watch it?
**[11:53] Hime**
Yeah.
**[11:54] Akari**
I wonder if there's a good solution?
**[11:59] Hime**
Hey, Mirai-san?
**[12:02] ---**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[12:04] Hikari**
This is simple!
**[12:05] Hikari**
You just need to limit how much time
you spend watching videos each day.
**[12:09] Hikari**
All it takes is a little discipline!
**[12:11] Yami**
How is that any fun?
**[12:14] Yami**
You need to be more true to your desires!
**[12:17] Yami**
Even if you can't focus on work or other
hobbies because of the lack of sleep,
**[12:19] Yami**
as long as you enjoy watching
videos all night, that's fine!
**[12:22] Hikari**
That's way too indulgent.
**[12:24] Hikari**
Everything is best in moderation.
**[12:26] Yami**
Who gives a crap?
**[12:28] Yami**
You only live once.
**[12:29] ---**
So all that matters is enjoying it.
**[12:31] Yami**
Watch all the vids you want!
**[12:33] Hikari**
Oh, this is no good...
**[12:35] Hikari**
Akari, take it from here.
**[12:38] Hime**
Hello! Earth to Mirai-san?
**[12:43] Akari**
Sorry, I was deep in thought!
**[12:44] Hime**
I appreciate the effort!
**[12:45] Akari**
Thank you so much!
**[12:48] Akari**
Pen name Tom-kun!
**[12:50] ---**
Here's the bottom line!
**[12:52] Hime**
Is she gonna get to it?! Her bottom... line?!
**[12:55] Akari**
You need a night job!
**[12:59] Hime**
A night job?!
**[12:59] Akari**
Yep! He wants to use his all-night
YouTube time more productively, right?
**[13:04] Akari**
In that case, he should get a night
job in addition to his day job!
**[13:09] Hime**
I see!
**[13:11] Akari**
That way, all that time he's spent watching
videos will all be turned into cash!
**[13:17] Hime**
Amazing! One simple trick!
**[13:19] Akari**
Plus!
**[13:21] Akari**
If you end up working that much, it limits
how much free time you have, right?
**[13:25] Hime**
True enough.
**[13:26] Akari**
That way, you can use your limited time
**[13:27] ---**
to make sure you only watch the videos
you're genuinely interested in!
**[13:32] Akari**
Like mine, for instance!
**[13:34] Hime**
She even threw in some self-promotion!
She's a natural!
**[13:36] Akari**
So, go and get a night job!
**[13:40] Hime**
But what if they're still a student,
and don't have a job yet?
**[13:48] Akari**
In that case, start going to night classes!
**[13:50] Hime**
I forgot about that option!
**[13:51] Akari**
Yeah! To make sure you don't
watch too much YouTube,
**[13:55] ---**
forget about sleeping, get a job
at night, or go to class at night!
**[13:57] Akari**
You've gotta use your
limited time effectively!
**[13:58] Akari**
That's the best life hack possible!
**[14:00] Hime**
Amazing! That's Akari-senpai
for you! So conscientious!
**[14:05] Hime**
Oh, that reminds me! Next week,
I'm gonna be bringing something different.
**[14:09] Akari**
Seriously?!
**[14:09] Hime**
See you then!
**[14:10] Akari**
Oh, okay. Got it! Come back soon!
**[14:13] Hime**
Yeah!
**[14:14] Akari**
See you next time! Bye-bye!
**[14:16] Hime**
Gotta get a job!
**[14:17] Hime**
Gotta sweat two liters away!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[14:24] Hinata**
Hey, hopscotch!
**[14:26] Hinata**
I remember playing this when
I was little and innocent.
**[14:31] Hinata**
One, two, three! One, two, three! One...
**[14:39] ---**
This is bad.
**[14:41] Hinata**
A sparrow's nest somehow fell to
at the end of this hopscotch court.
**[14:45] Hinata**
If I keep playing, that's gonna
be the end for those baby birds!
**[14:50] Hinata**
That'll make the mother super upset,
**[14:51] ---**
and you'll go crazy with anger,
pecking me without mercy!
**[14:57] Hinata**
But there's a risk in
leaving it as it is, too.
**[14:59] Hinata**
What do I do? What can I do?
**[15:16] Hinata**
Live strong, little sparrows.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[15:23] Mugi**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[15:32] Shiro**
Oh, it's Rikiya-kun! Welcome!
**[15:35] Touya**
It's Toya!
**[15:37] Touya**
Man, I am so fed up.
**[15:38] Touya**
Can I get some trivia about crabs, please?
***SIGN*** Crabs
**[15:44] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[15:46] Shiro**
Did you know they're related to spiders?
**[15:49] ---**
That's why they have eight legs!
**[15:55] Touya**
I'm not quite full yet.
**[15:57] ---**
Can I get some more?
**[16:01] ---**
Trivia, go!
**[16:04] Shiro**
Crabs...
**[16:05] Shiro**
Snow crabs and red king crabs
are probably the most popular.
**[16:09] Shiro**
But did you know that red king crabs are
technically, specifically, hermit crabs?
**[16:14] Shiro**
That's why, though most crabs only
walk sideways, they're able to walk forwards.
**[16:20] Shiro**
And in Japanese, red king crabs got their
**[16:23] ---**
names from being found in
the same locations as cod.
**[16:26] Shiro**
They're called taraba gani!
***SIGN*** Tara
(Cod)
***SIGN*** ba
(Location)
***SIGN*** Gani
(Crab)
**[16:30] Shiro**
Incidentally, I recommend eating red
king crab with cyber sesame sauce!
**[16:38] Toya**
Wow, I didn't know.
**[16:39] Toya**
Your trivia really is handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[16:48] Suigetsu**
Good day, everyone.
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Suigetsu
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:51] Suigetsu**
It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance.
**[16:54] Suigetsu**
My name is Suigetsu.
**[16:56] Suigetsu**
That's the character for "green" and
the character for "moon," for "Suigetsu."
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[17:05] Mito**
I wonder who's joining me today?
**[17:10] Alice**
Hello, Class President!
**[17:12] Alice**
I heard we were due for more tea!
**[17:14] Mito**
Ah, good to see you, and welcome, Alice.
**[17:16] Alice**
It's our second tea time!
**[17:17] Mito**
That it is.
**[17:18] Mito**
Let's begin your second visit to the ultimate
"Would you rather" committee/tea party!
**[17:23] Mito**
Here is our subject today!
**[17:25] Mito**
In exchange for one hundred million yen,
**[17:26] ---**
every song you hear from now on will be
"We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
**[17:29] Mito**
A) Sounds good, or B) No way.
**[17:31] Alice**
"We Wish You A Merry Christmas"?
**[17:34] Alice**
I like that carol, but would
that mean the opening
**[17:37] ---**
and ending theme songs
would be replaced with it?
**[17:39] Mito**
That's right, that would be the case.
**[17:40] Mito**
This would be an anime that starts with
"We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
**[17:43] Alice**
Seems like a odd choice, considering.
**[17:46] Mito**
True enough. Not only that,
but all the music in commercials
**[17:48] Mito**
and the New Year's Eve concert special
would be "We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
**[17:54] Alice**
But I think it would vary some depending on
**[17:56] ---**
if say, Ai-chan or Himehina-chan
were singing it.
**[17:57] Mito**
Oh, good point.
**[17:58] Alice**
I'd like to hear all the different versions.
**[18:01] Mito**
True, there's no rule that says
the vocalists can't change.
**[18:03] Alice**
Quite right.
**[18:04] Mito**
But y'know, if that was the
only thing you heard otherwise,
**[18:07] Mito**
actually hearing "We Wish You a
Merry Christmas" during actual Christmas time
**[18:11] Mito**
might feel like the culmination of something,
**[18:13] ---**
and as a result, sound a
lot more special than usual.
**[18:18] Alice**
Oh, I see.
**[18:19] Alice**
But I think that even if I were
being paid, I wouldn't like for
**[18:22] ---**
all the wonderful music
in the world to disappear.
**[18:25] Mito**
I dunno, Alice-chan, I think...
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[18:28] Mito**
Alice-chan, the correct
answer is A) Sounds good!
**[18:33] Alice**
But I want to enjoy all that music!
**[18:36] Mito**
You need to abandon that naïve nonsense!
**[18:38] Mito**
Money makes the world go round!
**[18:39] Mito**
A rap version would
probably be allowed, also!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[18:45] Alice**
While enjoying some lovely tea,
Virtual-san is once again looking today!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[18:51] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[18:54] Unity**
This is where it gets serious!
**[18:56] Unity**
Okay, let's do it!
**[18:58] Unity**
Gotta be careful... There!
**[19:03] Unity**
Wait to the last second!
**[19:04] Unity**
There!
**[19:06] Unity**
Oh, one more time!
**[19:09] Unity**
I did it!
**[19:18] Unity**
How does this happen?
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:27] Uma**
I hope you can hear me out today, Sister.
**[19:29] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:30] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:31] Uma**
I've always—
**[19:38] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:40] Sora**
My friends are always getting mad at
me for not replying to their messages.
**[19:44] Sora**
How can I stop forgetting to respond?
**[19:46] Sister**
Let's see.
**[19:47] Sister**
The most serious response would be to
**[19:49] ---**
make sure you check your messages
at the end of every day,
**[19:53] ---**
but I imagine you wouldn't be having this
trouble if you could remember to do that.
**[19:57] Sora**
Exactly!
**[19:58] Sister**
Why not change the name on
your messaging app then?
**[20:01] Sora**
Huh? Not my nickname?
**[20:04] Sister**
Right.
**[20:05] Sister**
For example, you could change it to
"Tokino Sora, the Jerk Who Never Replies."
**[20:10] Sora**
That's crazy... but I get it!
**[20:13] Sora**
"Tokino Sora, the Jerk Who
Never Replies"... There!
**[20:16] Sora**
Now I won't get yelled at anymore! Hooray!
**[20:20] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:22] Uma**
Sister! Could you reply to the
message I sent yesterday?!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:28] Unity**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[20:30] Unity**
These croquettes are delish!
**[20:35] Shiro**
Okay, I've got a letter here.
**[20:38] Shiro**
It's from someone with
the pen name "PGGP-san."
**[20:41] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:43] Shiro**
"Right now, I'm trying to come up
with a trick for drinking parties,
**[20:47] ---**
but I'm having trouble thinking up anything."
**[20:49] Shiro**
"Since I'm sure you all are
very talented in that regard,
**[20:53] ---**
could you come up with one I could use?"
**[20:58] Hime**
That's crazy!
**[20:58] Shiro**
Okay, Mito-Mito!
**[21:00] Mito**
Well, uh, this might get me in
trouble a lot of different ways.
**[21:03] Akari**
Oh, wow! What is it?!
**[21:04] Mito**
I'm going to do an impression of Facerig 2D.
**[21:18] Hime**
She's bugging out!
**[21:19] Hinata**
She keeps twitching!
**[21:23] Shiro**
Okay, okay, we're out of time,
so that's it for this week!
**[21:27] Shiro**
So until next week,
**[21:29] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:09] Both**
Hey yo, what up! KMNZ here!
**[23:11] Lita**
I'm MC Lita.
**[23:12] Liz**
I'm MC Liz.
**[23:13] Lita**
Another day, another episode!
**[23:14] Liz**
Good work people!
**[23:15] Lita**
I've been so busy I forgot to
eat dinner, so I'm starving!
**[23:17] Lita**
Did you remember to eat, Liz?
**[23:19] Liz**
Yep, I made sure to get something
good in me! It was really tasty!
**[23:22] Lita**
Sounds great, what did you eat?
**[23:23] Liz**
Pineapple!
**[23:24] Lita**
Oh, big juicy pineapples!
**[23:28] Both**
There were two dirty jokes
hidden in that conversation.
**[23:30] ---**
Did you notice?
**[23:32] Liz**
Next week is "Letting Your
Horse Carry You Whenever."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"Letting Your Horse Carry You Whenever"
**[23:34] Lita**
And next week,
**[23:35] Both**
Virtual-san will still be looking!
# E10 - Letting Your Horse Carry You Whenever
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR0X0V3EY/letting-your-horse-carry-you-whenever)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanuts**
They say that a camel's
humps are filled with fat.
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey, what are
you filled with, Peanut?
**[00:08] Peanuts**
I'm filled with heart, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
That's a good one!
**[00:10] Peanuts**
Shut it!
**[00:14] Hina**
*To, to, tomato!*
**[00:16] Hina**
*Pronunciation is really hard.*
**[00:18] Hina**
*Tomato!*
**[00:21] Shiro**
Oh, are you practicing English?
**[00:23] Hina**
Yeah!
**[00:24] Akari**
English pronunciation is so hard!
**[00:29] Mito**
*Good morning, everyone.*
**[00:31] Shiro**
Good morning, Mito-Mito!
**[00:33] Mito**
You want to talk about English, right?
**[00:35] Mito**
Then leave it to me!
**[00:37] Mito**
We'll start with you, Tanaka-san.
**[00:39] Hime**
*Virtual.*
**[00:40] Mito**
*No! Next!*
**[00:42] Hinata**
*Virtual!*
**[00:43] Mito**
My, that is adorable.
**[00:45] Akari**
*Virtuaaal!*
**[00:47] Mito**
Who was that supposed to be?
**[00:48] Mito**
Come on, everyone, this is no good!
**[00:50] Mito**
I guess I'll have to show an example...
**[00:52] Shiro**
*Virtual.*
**[00:53] Mito**
What?
**[00:54] Shiro**
*Virtual.*
**[00:55] Everyone**
Wow!
**[00:56] Everyone**
Nice one, Siro-chan!
**[00:56] Everyone**
That was great!
**[01:01] Everyone**
I mean,that is to say, exactly
what I expected from Siro-sama.
**[01:04] Everyone**
Although your inflection was slightly off.
**[01:08] Shiro**
Teacher, why don't you show us an example?!
**[01:10] Mito**
Uh, well, let's see, um...
**[01:13] Mito**
*V... Vir... Virtu...*
**[01:16] Mito**
Oh, no! Look at the time!
Gather around, everyone!
**[01:19] Hinata**
She dodged it.
**[01:20] Hina**
She totally dodged it.
**[01:22] Hina**
Mito-sensei, are you going to pronounce
it the English way this week?
**[01:24] Mito**
No! But as virtual youtubers,
we need to focus on Japanese!
**[01:27] Mito**
You need a sturdy base to work with!
**[01:29] Mito**
Ready and...
**[01:30] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:17] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 4
**[03:23] Akari**
Eek, something weird touched me!
**[03:26] Hime**
Oh, that was me.
**[03:27] Mito**
What are you two trying to do in
the middle of this confusion?!
***SIGN*** Mob C
**[03:32] Mob C**
Wh-Who are you?!
**[03:38] Robo**
Everyone! Get on, quick!
**[03:40] Hime**
It transformed!
**[03:41] Hina**
A Transfor—
**[03:42] Mito**
Noooope!
**[03:46] Mito**
Thank you for rescuing us.
**[03:48] Robo**
It's nothing.
**[03:49] Akari**
Hey, can I ask you something?
**[03:51] Robo**
Sure.
**[03:52] Akari**
Out of the six of us, who's your type?
**[03:58] Robo**
Ow, ow, ow! Why would you ask that now?!
**[04:01] Akari**
Because I'm curious!
**[04:03] Hina**
Now that you mention it, I might be, too.
**[04:05] Hinata**
We can decide who is on top
of the group's hierarchy...
**[04:09] Shiro**
Who gets to be the center of the unit?!
**[04:12] Robo**
No, no, no...
**[04:13] Robo**
I mean, getting asked out
of the blue like this...
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Virtual Kerin Slayer Wars
**[04:33] Haruto**
You're all going to pay for this.
**[04:36] Ryo**
Haru-kun, calm down!
We finally managed to get out of those suits.
**[04:39] Hime**
You got a problem?!
**[04:40] Hime**
You want those streaks yanked off your
head and replaced with smiley dumplings?!
**[04:42] Hina**
Down, down, girl... Easy does it.
**[04:44] Haruto**
Little girl, the fact that you have
pink hair is enough to disgust me!
**[04:48] Miria**
Harutrash, are you talking about me?
**[04:52] Ryo**
You need to stay calm too, Miria-chan!
**[04:54] Kaede**
Let's all just calm down and
try and find the culprit.
**[04:56] Kaede**
Don't you agree, Kerin-kun?
**[04:57] Kerin**
Well... Uh...
**[04:59] Kerin**
Those two Kerin Slayers
came after me, so I...
**[05:02] Hime**
You're the one who actually started it!
**[05:04] Ryo**
I feel kind of sorry for Kerin-kun.
**[05:06] Kerin**
Damn it all! I guess we're doing this!
**[05:10] Kerin**
This is their fault anyway!
**[05:13] Kerin**
But I guess I'll have to take you all down!
**[05:16] Hina**
W-Wait, stop, Kerin!
**[05:19] Kerin**
Super Ultimate Transformation
Magic, Buchisplurge!
**[05:23] Kaede**
That sounds dangerous...
**[05:25] Hina**
If we keep having to deal with him
we're risking mental pollution!
**[05:28] Hina**
Game Club! We need to work together
to stop Kerin from going berserk!
**[05:32] Ryo**
I agree! Chief! Haru-kun! Miria-chan!
Let's follow her orders for now!
**[05:36] Kaede**
Got it!
**[05:37] Miria**
Aye, aye, sir!
**[05:39] Haruto**
I suppose we have to!
**[05:40] Hime**
We'll pincer Kerin from the sides,
and then you all will use these!
**[05:44] Hime**
Nin!
**[05:46] Miria**
Wh-What the...?
**[05:47] Ryo**
Wow! These look powerful!
**[05:49] Hina**
Run Kerin through with those swords!
**[05:51] Kerin**
Hey, what's going on?!
**[05:53] Kerin**
Are we doing this, or not?!
**[05:56] Kerin**
You wanna get turned into tuna?!
**[05:57] Kerin**
Or maybe amberjack?!
**[05:59] Hina**
Hime, go!
**[06:00] Hime**
Yeah! Ninsplurge!
**[06:02] Kerin**
Damn it! Can't move...
**[06:04] Hime & Hina**
Now! Go!
**[06:17] Kerin**
Oh, no, not there!
**[06:19] Hime**
He's tougher than I thought.
**[06:20] Hina**
And seems to be enjoying it a little.
**[06:22] Haruto**
Hey, pink fool, you sure you
didn't stab him the wrong way?
**[06:25] Miria**
You stabbed him the wrong spot, Harutrash!
**[06:27] Kerin**
I guess that's the best you can muster!
**[06:30] Kerin**
Even together, you're no
match for the mighty Kerin!
**[06:35] Kaede**
I guess the swords aren't enough!
**[06:37] Kaede**
Do we have anything stronger?
**[06:38] Ryo**
Damn it, we almost had him!
**[06:41] Ryo**
He even looks like a pirate now!
**[06:45] Hime**
I understand.
This is a forbidden spell, but...
**[06:48] Hina**
Are you talking about... that?
**[06:50] Hime**
Let's do it.
**[06:51] Haruto**
Some sort of secret weapon?
**[06:52] Haruto**
You should've used it in the first place!
**[06:55] Hime & Hina**
In the name of the Girly Girl empire...
**[06:57] Hime & Hina**
In exchange for the life of the
dark one, grant us a weapon!
**[07:01] Haruto**
Wh-What the?! My body's floating!
**[07:04] Hime & Hina**
The Wicked Blade, Harutrash Sword!
**[07:07] Miria**
Harutrash...
**[07:09] Miria**
just turned into a sword!
**[07:10] Miria**
Hilarious.
**[07:11] Kaede**
Amazing! I had no idea he
had an alternate form!
**[07:14] Haruto**
Hey, what's the meaning
of this?! Ryo, save me!
**[07:16] Ryo**
Good luck, Haru-kun!
**[07:18] Hime**
Everyone, lend us your strength!
**[07:20] Hina**
We do this on go! Ready... go!
**[07:22] Everyone**
Harutrash Sword!
**[07:26] Kerin**
W-Wait! Stay back!
**[07:28] Kerin**
S-Stop!
**[07:31] Both**
We're getting blown away!
**[07:35] Hina**
That was a close one.
**[07:38] Kaede**
Thanks, Himehina-chan! I had no
idea magic like that existed.
**[07:41] Ryo**
That was a lot of fun!
I'm glad we crashed from space.
**[07:44] Hime**
Really?
**[07:45] Hime**
Harutrash just turned into
stardust, is that okay?
**[07:48] Miria**
Sure it is! Maybe that'll help
him cool off a little bit.
**[07:53] Hina**
You guys are really nice to Haruto-kun!
**[07:56] Miria**
Anyway, let's all play a game!
**[07:59] Kaede**
Good idea! Which one, though?
**[08:02] Hime**
Maybe Pop-Up Pirate?
**[08:04] Hime**
You're getting skewered next, Ryo-kun!
**[08:06] Ryo**
Aw, cut it out, Hime-chan!
**[08:10] Haruto**
Think of a way out of this!
**[08:11] Kerin**
Would you get out of me already?!
**[08:13] Haruto**
You need to pull me out or I'll blow you up!
**[08:16] Kerin**
Hey, that's my catchphrase!
**[08:18] Haruto**
Damn it! The five of them will pay for this!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
**[08:30] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[08:33] Grandma**
Bunmei Kaika.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Bunmei Kaika
**[08:36] G**
That's the phrase.
**[08:38] G**
It refers to, as human knowledge grows,
the world becomes more convenient.
**[08:43] G**
For example, can you all imagine
a time before package delivery?
**[08:48] G**
In the old days, your
only options for packages
**[08:51] G**
were the postal service
and railway delivery.
**[08:55] G**
The courier services first began serious
adoption in the latter half of the 1970s,
**[09:00] G**
developed through the 1980s, and only recently,
came to resemble what we have today.
**[09:07] G**
Come to think of it, you used to get
packages that came in solid wood boxes.
**[09:11] G**
And not a nice one either,
**[09:13] G**
but one that was crudely tied shut
with rope, that you had to force open.
**[09:17] G**
I imagine in those days, cardboard wasn't
as easy to get a hold of as it is now.
**[09:23] G**
Oh, a wooden box.
**[09:25] G**
Here we go.
**[09:27] Uma**
Woof!
**[09:29] G**
No, no, not woof...
**[09:31] G**
Aren't you a horse?
**[09:33] Uma**
Wofooom!
**[09:41] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[09:47] Siro**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[09:53] Aoi**
No guests ever seen to come by...
**[09:55] Gori**
Aoi-san is depressed.
I wish I could cheer her up.
**[09:59] Gori**
Aoi-san!
**[10:00] Aoi**
What is it?
**[10:01] Gori**
Get a load of this trick I can do!
**[10:03] Gori**
Come on, bananas!
**[10:06] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:08] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:11] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:12] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:14] Aoi**
Why is it raining bananas?!
**[10:15] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:16] Gori**
Heh-heh-hello!
Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-hello!
**[10:20] Gori**
I was hoping I could cheer you up
by practicing by banana catching...
**[10:24] Aoi**
Uh, making it rain bananas
is way more impressive!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[10:27] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
**[10:29] Gori**
Hello!
**[10:32] Mito**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[10:36] Mito**
I'm telling you, Akari-chan,
there's big trouble!
**[10:40] Akari**
What's wrong— Mito-chan?!
**[10:43] Mito**
Akari-san, there's big trouble afoot!
**[10:45] Akari**
There is?
**[10:46] Akari**
Oh, I guess you're taking over from now on!
**[10:48] Mito**
Indeed I am!
**[10:49] Akari**
So what is it?
**[10:50] Mito**
Penname Hitomi-chan, also known as
Tomi-Tomi, is worried about something!
**[10:53] Mito**
Please read this!
**[10:55] Akari**
AKA Tomi Tomi?
I wonder if it actually says that.
**[10:57] Mito**
No, rather, I was the one who decided that.
**[11:00] Akari**
I like it, it's cute! Tomi Tomi.
**[11:01] Mito**
Yes, indeed.
**[11:02] Akari**
Anyway, "Akari-san, hello."
**[11:04] Mito**
Hello there.
**[11:04] Akari**
Hello.
**[11:05] Akari**
"I'm a middle school student,"
**[11:07] Akari**
"and I really want to
become class president!"
**[11:10] Akari**
"But I'm not quite brave
enough to nominate myself."
**[11:13] Akari**
"Please tell me how to guarantee
victory if I do run!"
**[11:17] Mito**
A guaranteed victory...
***SIGN*** Problem: How to guarantee
a student council victory?
**[11:20] Akari**
Someone's greedy!
**[11:21] Mito**
It seems so, but as older ladies,
let's provide some answers.
**[11:23] Akari**
Good idea.
**[11:24] Akari**
Let's see, what kind of people
are suited for student council?
**[11:28] Mito**
Well, let me think.
**[11:29] Mito**
I think people who can't
make a strong impression
**[11:31] Mito**
will be doomed when the time
for speeches comes around.
**[11:34] Akari**
Oh, yeah, true. You can't be
throwing wimpy punches out there.
**[11:35] Mito**
Exactly!
**[11:36] Mito**
So you need to be able to draw a line!
**[11:38] Mito**
It needs to be the kind of person who can
say "no" definitively, and really mean it!
**[11:40] Akari**
Like an American?
**[11:42] Mito**
An American?
**[11:43] Mito**
I didn't mean that in the
literal, linguistic sense!
**[11:45] Mito**
I just meant no as in a negative response!
**[11:47] Mito**
We're not trying to answer riddles here!
**[11:50] Akari**
But Hitomi-chan wants guaranteed victory
in the student council election, right?
**[11:56] Mito**
Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
**[11:59] Yami**
Bribe 'em!
***SIGN*** Yami
***SIGN*** Hikari
**[12:01] Hikari**
Bzzt!
**[12:03] Hikari**
That's a terrible idea,
and we're talking about a student,
**[12:06] Hikari**
so it's not like she'd
have a lot of money.
**[12:08] Yami**
How about handing out some
tasty Japanese sweets, then?
**[12:12] Hikari**
That's not exactly legitimate, either.
**[12:16] Yami**
Well... You could always lure
your rival out behind the gym,
**[12:19] Yami**
sneak up behind them, and then—
**[12:21] Hikari**
Bzzzzt! Nope, nope, nope!
**[12:24] Hikari**
Sorry, Akari, take it from here.
**[12:29] Mito**
Hello? Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
**[12:33] Akari**
My consciousness was somewhere else...
**[12:34] Mito**
Welcome back, then.
**[12:35] Akari**
Good to be back.
**[12:37] Akari**
Penname Hitomi-chan! Here's the bottom line!
**[12:42] Mito**
She's going to expose it!
Her bottom... line!
**[12:45] Akari**
Start referring to yourself exclusively
as student council president!
**[12:50] Akari**
Right now, Hitomi-chan probably thinks
of herself as "me" or "Hitomi,"
***SIGN*** The class prez thinks ...
**[12:55] Akari**
but starting tomorrow, she needs to
do it exclusively as "Class Prez!"
**[12:59] Akari**
"As class president, I think this" and
**[13:02] Akari**
"The class president is kind
of tired", that sorta thing.
**[13:04] Mito**
So just declare it herself?
**[13:06] Akari**
Exactly!
**[13:06] Akari**
If you keep it up for long
enough, and act naturally,
**[13:10] Akari**
people will be brainwashed into thinking
"Oh, she must be class president."
**[13:13] Mito**
Is that really possible?!
**[13:14] Akari**
You bet it is!
**[13:16] Akari**
Not only that, but you need
to always wear the sash!
**[13:18] Akari**
Like you're telling people
"I'm the class president!"
**[13:20] Mito**
I don't think I've ever seen an actual
class president wear one of those...
**[13:22] Akari**
You can even force people to
start working on projects!
**[13:24] Akari**
Like telling the discipline
officer to do something,
**[13:26] Akari**
or asking a teacher about the schedule for
the meeting with the parents association...
**[13:29] Mito**
That's certainly the direct approach!
**[13:31] Akari**
And eventually, no one will doubt that
Hitomi-chan is the class president anymore,
**[13:35] Akari**
so no one will even think about candidates
or voting in the first place!
**[13:39] Mito**
Undermining the entire electoral process!
**[13:41] Akari**
You've got to keep a dream in your heart...
**[13:42] Akari**
Keeping it in your boobs won't do any good!
**[13:43] Mito**
I'm not sure what that
turn of phrase implies?
**[13:44] Akari**
You've gotta talk the talk!
**[13:46] Mito**
This has been educational.
**[13:48] Akari**
Starting tomorrow, when you
talk to your family or friends,
**[13:51] Akari**
or even give your name for
an order at restaurant...
**[13:53] Mito**
Even then?
**[13:54] Akari**
You always refer to yourself as class prez!
**[13:56] Akari**
That kind of passion is what will
take you to greater heights!
**[14:01] Mito**
Impressive, Akari-san!
**[14:03] Mito**
I'll be on my way, then.
**[14:05] Akari**
But I didn't get to slurp
on your zettai ryoiki yet!
**[14:08] Mito**
The script says I should say I'll be back,
but that comment really makes me not want to!
**[14:10] Akari**
Hey!
**[14:11] Akari**
Well, see you next time, Mito-chan! Bye-bye!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[14:26] Hinata**
I want to score some headshots!
**[14:34] Hinata**
Oh, this is bad.
**[14:36] Hinata**
The other day, Akari-chan popped
out from inside those pipes.
**[14:38] Hinata**
They might make a good hiding spot.
**[14:41] Hinata**
If I were to set up in
position with a 4x scope...
**[14:43] Hinata**
The second a head pops out from
the left of the pipe, bang!
**[14:46] Hinata**
Or, from the right, bang!
**[14:48] Hinata**
And even if they're behind the pipes,
and their head pops up, bang!
**[14:52] Hinata**
But if I'm noticed, they might be
able to pop smoke and get away...
**[14:56] Hinata**
Can I really nail them with a single shot?
**[14:59] Hinata**
I wonder what would be best...
**[15:05] Hinata**
I've got it!
**[15:07] Hinata**
This is too much of a pain!
**[15:08] Hinata**
I'm going to get in close and
go for the kill with grenades!
**[15:11] Hinata**
Time to turn that horsey
bastard into horse sashimi!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[15:21] Hinata**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[15:29] Shiro**
Oh, it's Futaba-chan! Welcome!
**[15:33] 2ba**
Oh, I am so fed up...
**[15:36] 2ba**
Can I get some trivia about names, please?
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[15:45] Shiro**
Names.
**[15:46] Shiro**
There's a lot of locations around the world
**[15:48] Shiro**
with names that sound like
Japanese homophones.
**[15:51] Shiro**
Like the tourist town in Argentina,
**[15:53] Shiro**
whose name sounds like
"Maru de aho" or "like an idiot,"
**[15:56] Shiro**
but it's Mar de Ajó,
which means sea of garlic!
**[15:59] Shiro**
There's a mountain in Indonesia
named "Baka" like stupid,
**[16:03] Shiro**
but in Indonesian, baka can
mean eternity or family.
**[16:08] Shiro**
There's also a famous example
that's a little exciting,
**[16:12] Shiro**
the nation of Vanuatu has
an island called Erromango,
**[16:15] Shiro**
but it means "humans" in the local
language, and not sexy comics!
**[16:19] Shiro**
When you think about how baka
can mean eternity and family,
**[16:22] Shiro**
and how ero manga can mean human,
**[16:26] Shiro**
it really makes you realize how versatile
language can be, doesn't it?
**[16:31] Futaba**
Wow, really?
**[16:34] Futaba**
Your trivia is always so handy, Shiro-chan.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[16:40] Koko**
Living life in a daze...
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Torimochi Koko
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:43] Koko**
I'm from Virtual Cast!
**[16:47] Koko**
And my name is Torimochi Koko.
**[16:50] Koko**
Okay?
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[16:54] Mito**
This feeling... I've got chills again.
**[17:05] Mito**
Mugi-chan! Please quiet down!
**[17:06] Mito**
You're going to rupture my eardrums!
**[17:08] Mugi**
I'm sorry Class Prez.
**[17:10] Mugi**
I'm just so scared when I'm alone...
**[17:11] Mito**
Well I'm sorry for scaring you,
**[17:14] Mito**
but it's time to do the the ultimate
"Would you rather" committee.
**[17:16] Mugi**
Right.
**[17:16] Mito**
Here's our subject for today!
**[17:18] Mito**
Which would you rather lose the
use of for the rest of your life?
**[17:22] Mito**
A) Z characters
**[17:23] Mito**
B) P characters
**[17:24] Mugi**
I'm not sure I understand, Class Prez.
**[17:27] Mito**
Basically would you rather lose all the
Japanese words that use za ji zu ze zo,
**[17:30] Mito**
or pa pi pu pe po.
**[17:31] Mugi**
I see!
**[17:33] Mugi**
Well I don't really say party
hard or panties or pisser,
**[17:36] Mugi**
so I guess I could do without the Ps.
**[17:38] Mito**
Those are some fairly
crass words, I suppose.
**[17:41] Mugi**
I think so.
**[17:42] Mito**
But you wouldn't be able to say pirika
pirilala poporina peperuto anymore.
**[17:46] Mugi**
That's a little before my time...
**[17:48] Mugi**
For my generation, the transformation
phrase is "Metamorphose!"
**[17:52] Mito**
Oh, I see. So I'd be the
one who couldn't use that.
**[17:55] Mugi**
Right.
**[17:56] Mito**
But I have a plan in mind.
**[17:58] Mito**
See, you just need to become a gal.
**[17:59] Mugi**
Become a gal?
**[18:00] Mito**
See, when you write out how a gal speaks,
**[18:02] Mito**
instead of putting the dots
next to the character for shi,
**[18:03] Mito**
you put it next to the ones for chi.
**[18:05] Mugi**
I see!
**[18:06] Mito**
That being the case...
**[18:08] Mito**
OMG Mugi Mugi, I just can't
even with school tomorrow.
**[18:11] Mugi**
I just can't even, too.
**[18:12] Mito**
We're bffs, right?
**[18:13] Mugi**
W-We are?
**[18:14] Mito**
Total besties, amirite?
**[18:15] Mugi**
Besties?
**[18:17] Mito**
See how that works?
**[18:17] Mugi**
I see... not exactly dignified, though.
**[18:20] Mito**
OMG it's like 3 RN,
**[18:22] Mito**
wasn't sure, at first, but it's totes the Zs.
**[18:28] Mito**
So, like, us virtual youtubers
are totes bffs forever!
**[18:33] Mugi**
Senpai, that idea was wicked pissah! Party hard!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[18:41] Toya**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[18:44] Unity**
Unity-chan.
**[18:46] Hinata**
*From pen name, King of Kings.*
**[18:48] Everybody**
*Thanks for writing!*
**[18:50] Hinata**
*"I have a question for you all."*
**[18:52] Hinata**
* "If you were the kings of a country,*
* what kind of nation would you build?"*
**[18:58] Hinata**
*He asks.*
***SIGN*** If you were king, what would
your kingdom be like?
**[18:59] Hina**
*Good question!*
**[19:00] Akari**
* If I was royalty, I'd want to make*
* a law where wherever I go out—*
**[19:02] Unity**
Fear not!
**[19:03] Unity**
For I am the king...
**[19:09] Unity**
Croquettes... yummy...
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:20] Uma**
I hope I finally get to
say this today, Sister.
**[19:22] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:24] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:24] Uma**
About a year ago—
**[19:30] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:31] Sora**
When I go to bed, the ticking of the seconds
hand bothers me and I can't sleep.
**[19:34] Sora**
I'm worried I'll never get enough rest...
**[19:37] Sister**
I see. Have you tried listening
to some music you enjoy?
**[19:41] Sora**
I tried, but it still bothered me.
**[19:43] Sister**
Well in that case, maybe you
could keep a tiger in your room,
**[19:46] Sister**
so that you have more pressing concerns
than the ticking of a clock.
**[19:49] Sora**
I get you! That'd definitely
be more worrying.
**[19:51] Sora**
But wouldn't I get eaten?
**[19:54] Sister**
That is a risk, yes.
**[19:56] Sora**
I don't wanna, then!
**[19:57] Sister**
Then you may have to resort
to desperate measures.
**[20:00] Sora**
Desperate measures?
**[20:02] Sister**
Switching to a digital clock!
**[20:04] Sora**
I didn't think of that!
**[20:05] Sora**
I'm gonna get plenty of rest tonight!
Thank you, Sister!
**[20:08] Uma**
Shouldn't that have been
what you tried first?!
**[20:10] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:14] Uma**
At the time of the scream, it will be 12:00.
**[20:21] Uma**
Sister!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:27] Unity**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[20:29] Unity**
Yeah!
**[20:31] Hime**
Okay, I've got a letter here from
pen name, Festival Wasshoi-san!
**[20:36] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:39] Hime**
"Of all the events at school,
I love the culture fest the most."
**[20:43] Hime**
"If you were going to put on
a virtual culture festival,
**[20:46] Hime**
what kind of attractions would you have?"
***SIGN*** What would you do for a
virtual culture festival?
**[20:49] Akari**
Oh, me, me, me!
**[20:49] Hime**
What is it?
**[20:50] Akari**
Let's see, I'd have a big
skirt flipping contest!
**[20:53] Shiro**
Beep, beep! Beep, beep!
**[20:54] Akari**
You get like giant fan or something,
and kick up a huge breeze,
**[20:57] Akari**
and the girls skirts all
go flapping in the wind!
**[21:00] Mito**
That runs the risk of getting classified as
a certain type of business, so let's not!
**[21:03] Shiro**
Oh, I've got one, here!
**[21:05] Hime**
Sure, what is it?
**[21:05] Shiro**
You know how humans tend to end
their culture festivals with a big bonfire?
**[21:10] Shiro**
And how cleaning up after an event
is always a lot of work?
**[21:15] Shiro**
So what you do when you're done
**[21:16] Shiro**
is throw everything into the fire,
including the attendees,
**[21:19] Shiro**
and it'll all be nice and clean!
**[21:19] Mito**
What you're describing
is kind of terrifying...
**[21:20] Akari**
It's a kebab festival!
***SIGN*** The suggestions continued to be dangerous,
so we're forcing this segment to a close.
**[21:28] Hime**
Okay, and that does it for this week!
**[21:30] Hime**
So until next time,
**[21:32] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:13] Pino**
Good day to you. I'm Karuro Pino.
***SIGN*** Karuro Pino
***SIGN*** Kagura Suzu
**[23:15] Suzu**
Good afternoon, Kagura Suzu here.
**[23:17] Pino**
Say, Suzu-oneechan, would you
like to play insect shiritori?
**[23:19] Suzu**
Insect shiritori? What do you mean?
**[23:21] Pino**
You just play shiritori with the name of bugs.
**[23:23] Suzu**
Bug names?
**[23:24] Pino**
Here we go! Cricket!
**[23:25] Suzu**
Are— Are we really just starting?
**[23:28] Pino**
Yes we are!
**[23:30] Suzu**
T... Termite!
**[23:31] Pino**
E... Earwig!
**[23:32] Suzu**
I'm already uncomfortable with this!
**[23:34] Pino**
Next time is "Granny."
***SIGN*** Next Time: "Granny"
**[23:35] Suzu**
And next week,
**[23:36] Both**
Virtual-san will be looking!
# E11 - Granny
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYZJM7E4R/granny)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
They say that most polar
bears are left-handed.
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey...
**[00:09] Peanut**
You bastard!
**[00:14] Shiro**
We who are virtual must always be refined.
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[00:18] Mito**
Ah, yes, the "refinement first" mindset!
**[00:21] Shiro**
Yes!
**[00:21] Shiro**
And I believe today is a good day to
teach everyone about being refined.
**[00:27] Mito**
You can't just try and
be dignified, of course.
**[00:29] Mito**
You have to really follow through!
**[00:30] Mito**
Siro-san, if you'd offer an example.
**[00:33] Shiro**
I intend to become an idol,
**[00:34] Shiro**
and also have total dominion over
the human race's internal organs!
**[00:38] Everyone**
Now that's refined!
**[00:39] Akari**
Super re-fine fine fine!
**[00:43] Hime**
I want to see Mito-sama do an example too!
**[00:47] Hinata**
Careful now! This is
going to be really refined.
**[00:49] Mito**
Uh...
**[00:50] Hina**
Social media is going to be
blowing up with #refined today!
**[00:55] Mito**
Hang on, everyone.
**[00:56] Mito**
I get the feeling you're really
expecting a lot from me here.
**[00:59] Shiro**
Now, let's get a glimpse of
how refined Mito-sama is.
**[01:02] Everyone**
Three!
**[01:03] Mito**
A countdown?!
**[01:03] Everyone**
Two!
**[01:04] Everyone**
One!
**[01:05] Everyone**
Go!
**[01:08] Mito**
The latest and greatest...
**[01:10] Mito**
Transcendentally, splendiferously
refined class president!
**[01:13] Mito**
The woman who loves,
and is loved by, refinement—
***SIGN*** We apologize for this unsightly display of refinement.
**[01:19] Shiro**
Well, let's put what we learned
in today's lesson to use!
**[01:23] Shiro**
Ready, and...
**[01:25] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:12] Elu**
Virtual-san is looking, elu elu.
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 5
**[03:19] Shiro**
It's a giant Siro!
**[03:21] Hime**
Where did it come from?!
**[03:24] Mito**
I think I understand what's going on.
**[03:26] Mito**
Could it be that this world is your...
**[03:33] Mob D**
Hold it!
**[03:37] Mob D**
Remove them! By force!
**[03:40] Akari**
In public, during broad daylight? We can't!
**[03:43] Mito**
Again, I'm not sure what you're imagining!
**[03:47] Mob D**
You need to hand them over!
***SIGN*** Mob D
**[03:51] Robo**
I... can't do that!
**[03:53] Mob D**
Then we'll remove you by force, too!
**[03:56] Mob D**
Remove by force!
**[03:58] Mob D**
Remove by force!
**[03:59] Mob D**
Remove by force!
**[04:01] Akari**
What do we do?
**[04:02] Mito**
We'll just have to watch over him.
**[04:05] Mito**
This is an important battle,
one that can't be avoided.
**[04:10] Shiro**
But at this rate, he'll...
**[04:14] Mito**
He's the one who will determine
whether or not this world can change.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[04:26] Shiro**
I thought we were done for!
**[04:28] Shiro**
It's such a relief to be alive!
**[04:30] Akari**
Hey, do you guys want to do a barbecue?
**[04:33] Akari**
While the weather's still cold!
**[04:34] Hina**
Meat! Yes!
**[04:36] Hime**
I'm in! I'm ready to eat!
**[04:38] Hinata**
Me too!
**[04:39] Mito**
I get the feeling this group
is all eaters and no cooks.
**[04:42] Shiro**
Hey, if you were going to bring one thing
to the barbecue, what would it be?
**[04:47] Hime**
Meat buns!
**[04:47] Akari**
Ginkgo nuts, ginkgo nuts!
Ginkgo nuts, ginkgo nuts!
**[04:54] Akari**
That scared me!
**[04:56] Akari**
What was that shaking—
**[04:57] Akari**
Hey, look outside!
**[05:00] Everyone**
Magma?!
**[05:02] Shiro**
Are we on a volcano again?!
**[05:04] Hina**
No, we're even closer to one this time!
**[05:08] Mito**
You're right, the bottom of
my feet feel really hot!
**[05:10] Mito**
Like we're being cooked from below!
**[05:13] Hina**
Hot, hot!
**[05:13] Hina**
Great, looks like we're gonna
be served at the barbecue!
**[05:17] Hinata**
But I like eating, not being eaten!
**[05:21] Akari**
Oh, fine, then... I'll just have to
eat you up then, Hinata-chan!
**[05:30] Mito**
Everyone, calm down.
**[05:32] Mito**
I think we're basically done for.
**[05:34] Mito**
No sense in fighting it.
**[05:36] Mito**
Let's all get in some proper
last words before we pass on.
**[05:38] Mito**
If you'd start us off, Akari-san.
**[05:40] Akari**
Right.
**[05:40] Akari**
Hear me well...
**[05:42] Akari**
Don't you ever stop!
**[05:44] Hina**
What next?
**[05:46] Mito**
If you'd go ahead, Siro-san.
**[05:48] Siro**
Horse, thank you for everything.
**[05:52] Mito**
Hime-san, you're up.
**[05:54] Hime**
In my next life... I'll be the
number one chuckling dumpling!
**[05:58] Akari**
You're the only one of those.
**[05:59] Mito**
Very much so.
**[06:01] Mito**
Go ahead, Hina-san.
**[06:03] Hina**
Make sure to dunk my computer in the tub.
**[06:07] Akari**
That's a good idea! A really good idea!
**[06:09] Mito**
You're next, Hinata-san.
**[06:11] Hinata**
I have no regrets about the life I have lived!
**[06:15] Everyone**
So cool!
**[06:17] Mito**
I'll go ahead and wrap it up, then.
**[06:19] Mito**
Uh, thank you for having us here,
**[06:22] Mito**
on this wonderful occasion on
a clear, but magma-filled, day.
**[06:25] Mito**
It's said that there are three
types of sanctity in life, which...
**[06:28] Hime**
Too long!
**[06:29] Shiro**
I don't know what it is,
but I'm starting to feel good!
**[06:34] Hinata**
Something about sinking
into magma like this...
**[06:37] Hinata**
It reminds me of that movie.
**[06:41] Hime**
In that case, let's end it with that line!
**[06:43] Hime**
Ready, and...
**[06:44] Everyone**
I'll be back!
**[06:55] Sora**
Let's say it together!
**[06:57] Sora**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[07:02] Uma**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[07:04] Uma**
And so am I.
**[07:12] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:13] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:14] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:15] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:16] Gori**
It's a monkey!
***SIGN*** A... monkey?
**[07:20] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:21] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:22] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:23] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:24] Gori**
On a southern island!
***SIGN*** Does he mean South Africa?
**[07:27] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:28] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:29] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:30] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:31] Gori**
With the long tail!
***SIGN*** A tail...?
**[07:35] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:36] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:37] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:38] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:39] Gori**
There was a monkey!
**[07:43] Aoi**
Dude, you've got it wrong.
**[07:44] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:47] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:50] Mito**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[07:55] Mito**
Akari-chan, there's really big trouble!
**[08:05] Akari**
What is it, Mito-chan?
**[08:06] Mito**
Akari-san, we've got really big trouble!
**[08:08] Akari**
Don't cry! What is it? What's wrong?
**[08:11] Mito**
Someone with the pen name "Manami-chan,
**[08:13] Mito**
a.k.a. Omana," is worried about something!
**[08:14] Akari**
Omana!
**[08:15] Mito**
Please, read this.
**[08:16] Akari**
Got it. Omana, huh? Okay.
**[08:18] Akari**
"Akari-san, hello."
**[08:19] Mito**
Hello.
**[08:20] Akari**
H'lo!
**[08:21] Akari**
I'm in my second year of
college and looking for jobs,
**[08:23] Akari**
but during interviews,
I always get too nervous to talk.
**[08:24] Mito**
Right, right, right.
**[08:24] Akari**
Please, tell me how to stay
cool in important situations!
**[08:32] Mito**
Well, I'm a high schools student, butts...
***SIGN*** Problem: How to not get nervous
during important moments?
**[08:35] Mito**
I mean, a high school student, but—
**[08:36] Akari**
High school student butts!
**[08:38] Mito**
A high school student, however!
**[08:39] Akari**
Yeah?
**[08:40] Mito**
However, since I've been lucky enough
to be in assorted big productions,
**[08:44] Mito**
I understand how she feels!
**[08:45] Akari**
Oh, yeah, it's easy to get nervous.
**[08:46] Mito**
Especially with interviews.
**[08:48] Akari**
Let's see, a way to not get nervous in
critical situations, so you can act normal...
**[08:52] Akari**
What would be the trick?
**[08:57] Mito**
Oh, Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
**[09:01] Yami**
No need to be nervous.
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:03] Yami**
Nobody doing an interview is
gonna be worth a damn anyway.
**[09:06] Hikari**
That's not true!
**[09:09] Hikari**
I'm sure that if they're doing the interviews,
they have to be important!
**[09:13] Yami**
That kind of naïve crap is why people
get choked up in the first place.
**[09:18] Yami**
Just mess around on your
phone and answer casually.
**[09:22] Hikari**
There's no way you'd get
a job with that attitude!
**[09:27] Yami**
Well... I don't care!
**[09:31] Hikari**
No good... Akari, you take it from here!
**[09:35] Mito**
Hello? Mirai-san! Mirai-san?!
**[09:39] Akari**
Sorry, I'm back.
**[09:41] Mito**
Welcome back.
**[09:43] Akari**
Pen name Manami-chan! Here's the bottom line!
**[09:47] Mito**
She's going to expose it!
Her firm bottom line!
**[09:51] Akari**
You need to go to a toy store!
**[09:54] Akari**
The best thing to do when you're
nervous is to focus on a simple task.
**[09:59] Mito**
I see.
**[10:00] Akari**
Apparently, if you talk while doing a
jigsaw puzzle, you'll naturally be less tense!
**[10:04] Mito**
I see!
**[10:05] Mito**
You're dividing your attention, essentially.
**[10:07] Akari**
Right!
**[10:08] Akari**
So Manami-chan should head to a
toy store and buy a Rubik's Cube!
**[10:14] Akari**
Then she should practice
with it a bunch at home!
**[10:16] Akari**
Until she can solve it in five minutes!
**[10:18] Akari**
Then, when it's time for
the interview, she says this:
**[10:21] Akari**
"I've got a talent for solving Rubik's Cubes.
**[10:24] Akari**
I'm going to solve this one
before this interview is over."
**[10:27] Mito**
Is that a good idea?!
**[10:29] Akari**
Then she focuses on the Rubik's Cube!
**[10:31] Akari**
There's a time limit, after all.
**[10:32] Mito**
But she has to answer the
interview questions, too.
**[10:35] Akari**
It'll be fine!
**[10:36] Mito**
"Is there anything you're
focused on at the moment?"
**[10:41] Akari**
"Getting this red side sorted, I'd say."
**[10:44] Mito**
That's not the point of the question!
**[10:46] Akari**
But did you notice, Mito-chan?
**[10:48] Akari**
Wasn't nervous at all, was I?
**[10:50] Mito**
Y-You're right!
**[10:52] Akari**
And then once she solves
it like she said, it'll be like,
**[10:56] Akari**
"She can really deliver on what she says!"
**[10:58] Akari**
Talk about leaving a positive impression!
**[11:01] Mito**
Not getting nervous and passing the interview!
Two birds with one stone!
**[11:05] Akari**
Now all that's left is to
practice with a Rubik's Cube!
**[11:08] Mito**
Oh, right, right.
**[11:09] Mito**
Someone else is going to
bring the letter by next week!
**[11:12] Akari**
This is your last time, Mito-chan?
**[11:13] Mito**
Yes!
**[11:14] Akari**
I'll miss you! Let me give you a lick!
**[11:16] Mito**
If you'll excuse me!
**[11:17] Akari**
Bye-bye!
**[11:18] Mito**
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:30] Hime**
This is finally the last one!
**[11:33] Hime**
Augh, it's the old maid!
**[11:38] Hinata**
Looks like I win!
**[11:39] Hinata**
There!
**[11:40] Hinata**
It's the old maid!
**[11:44] Hime**
It seems that God wants me to win.
**[11:47] Hime**
That one!
**[11:49] Hime**
It's the old maid again!
**[11:51] Hinata**
This is quite a battle.
**[11:53] Hinata**
But... this will be the end!
**[11:56] Hinata**
I win—again?!
**[11:59] Hinata**
I'm getting tired of this.
**[12:02] Hime**
This joker sure does turn up a lot!
**[12:06] Hime**
Not again!
**[12:09] Hinata**
I don't wanna run into the old maid again.
**[12:13] Mito**
You two are going to be late!
**[12:15] Both**
The old maid!
**[12:16] Mito**
Who the hell are you calling an old maid?!
**[12:19] Hime & Other Hina**
Run for it!
**[12:20] Mito**
Get back here, you two!
**[12:22] Mito**
Hold it right there!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[12:29] Hime & Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:38] Shiro**
Oh, it's Hinata-chan! Welcome!
**[12:41] Kaede**
I am so fed up!
**[12:44] Kaede**
Can I get some trivia about trips, please?
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:53] Shiro**
You know, trips can also
be a type of internet lingo.
**[12:56] Shiro**
There's the famous message board, 2channel,
**[13:00] Shiro**
where all the posts are anonymous by default,
**[13:03] Shiro**
so that people can write whatever they
want without worrying about prying eyes.
**[13:06] Shiro**
But sometimes if you're making a string
of posts, you don't want to give a name,
**[13:11] Shiro**
but you want people to know it's the same
person responsible for previous posts!
**[13:16] Shiro**
You get what I mean, right, Hinata-chan?
**[13:18] Shiro**
For times like that,
**[13:19] Shiro**
you can get a string of random characters
that will indicate who made the post!
**[13:25] Shiro**
It's called a tripcode or "trip"!
**[13:29] Shiro**
By the way, 2channel has now
changed its name to 5channel.
**[13:36] Hinata**
Wow, really?
**[13:39] Hinata**
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:48] Mito**
I wonder who's here this week?
**[13:55] Elu**
Oh, Mito-san, I've been waiting!
**[13:58] Mito**
Huh? And you are?
**[13:59] Elu**
I-it's me, Elu!
**[14:00] Mito**
Right.
**[14:01] Mito**
Okay, Elu-san, let's get started on the
ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[14:04] Mito**
Here is today's especially ultimate choice!
**[14:08] Mito**
Let's say you can only respond
to questions one way from now on.
**[14:10] Mito**
Which would you prefer?
**[14:12] Mito**
A) Yes. B) No.
**[14:14] Elu**
So you either become a yes man for life,
or someone who always says no.
**[14:17] Elu**
That is pretty ultimate.
**[14:18] Mito**
Which do you pick?
**[14:19] Elu**
I'd go with "yes."
**[14:20] Mito**
But why?
**[14:21] Elu**
I mean, I'd rather be the kind of
person who says "yes" than "no."
**[14:25] Elu**
Doesn't that just give a more
positive impression overall?
**[14:26] Mito**
It does seem more friendly, indeed.
**[14:28] Elu**
Right?
**[14:29] Elu**
I'm kind of self-conscious
about that sort of thing.
**[14:31] Mito**
Oh, Elu-chan, would you carry my bags?
**[14:33] Elu**
Oh, sure.
**[14:34] Mito**
And can I break your finger?
**[14:36] Elu**
Uh... okay.
**[14:38] Mito**
You just agreed, so I'm gonna do it, okay?
**[14:40] Elu**
Oh boy, that's... maybe I
should change my answer.
**[14:40] Mito**
Just you wait.
**[14:43] Mito**
Really?
**[14:44] Elu**
But y'know, there's something kind of
standoffish about only ever saying no.
**[14:47] Mito**
Ah, but you see, I've got
a plan to counteract that.
**[14:50] Elu**
What, really?
**[14:51] Elu**
Okay, I'll ask some questions.
**[14:52] Mito**
Okay.
**[14:53] Elu**
Mito-Mito-chan, you want to
treat me to sushi today?
**[14:57] Mito**
Nope.
**[14:58] Mito**
But I'm kind of hungry, so...
**[15:01] Mito**
I guess I could go, maybe.
**[15:06] Elu**
Well, you and I are good friends, right?
**[15:09] Mito**
Nope.
**[15:11] Mito**
But I've got an opening in my friend roster.
**[15:14] Mito**
So I guess I could fit you in, maybe...
**[15:17] Elu**
So the trick is to become a tsundere.
**[15:18] Mito**
Exactly, all you need to do is act tsundere.
**[15:20] Elu**
That's actually pretty slick.
**[15:21] Mito**
And time's up!
**[15:23] Mito**
It was fuzzy for a moment,
but the correct answer is "no"!
**[15:27] Elu**
Yeah, I'm actually convinced.
**[15:29] Mito**
That's right!
**[15:30] Mito**
Tsundere is on the verge of passing from the
lexicon, so let's prop it up aggressively!
**[15:37] Kerin**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[15:39] Kerin**
Let's blow it up!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:42] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[15:45] Unity**
Here they come!
**[15:48] Unity**
There!
**[15:50] Unity**
Take that!
**[15:51] Unity**
Piece of cake!
**[15:56] Unity**
There you are! This time,
I'm getting that rare drop!
**[16:00] Unity**
Mega magic!
**[16:02] Unity**
Ultimate Croquette Power Kick!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Yosshuchan
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:14] Yossuh**
Hello there. So, the other
day I was at the pub,
**[16:17] Yossuh**
and these people were making a ton of noise,
**[16:18] Yossuh**
and I couldn't take it anymore,
**[16:20] Yossuh**
so I let them have it!
**[16:21] Yossuh**
Like, "Do you want some of these edamame?"
**[16:22] Yossuh**
What did you think I meant
by letting them have it?
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[16:30] Everybody**
Harutrash Sword!
**[16:32] Everybody**
We're getting blown away!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:38] Hina**
Hey, what are we doing
in a big city like this?
**[16:42] Hime**
It's been a few years since Kerin disappeared,
**[16:44] Hime**
but I got a tip that he's living in this city.
**[16:47] Hina**
The dark elf who lives in the
woods of Gunma... in the city?
**[16:50] Hime**
Yep, yep! I know how it sounds.
**[16:52] Hime**
I think he should be around here, somewhere.
**[16:56] Hina**
Kerin!
**[16:57] Hime**
Yo! How you been?
**[16:59] Kerin**
Who are you people?
**[17:01] Hime**
You forgot about us?!
**[17:03] Hime**
We used to shoot missiles and
magic around, trying to kill each other!
**[17:08] Hina**
That's right!
**[17:10] Hina**
You always got the short end of the stick,
**[17:12] Hina**
but your ballistics and
Himehina were pretty close!
**[17:15] Hime**
Yep.
**[17:15] Kerin**
Oh, you two...
**[17:17] Kerin**
I don't even feel like
starting anything anymore.
**[17:21] Hime**
You reek of booze!
**[17:22] Hina**
Kerin, what happened to you?
**[17:24] Kerin**
Oh, me?
**[17:26] Kerin**
I wanted to polish myself...
**[17:28] Kerin**
for when I would meet Elu-san again,
so I came to the city.
**[17:32] Kerin**
And it beat me.
**[17:34] Hina**
But how?
**[17:37] Hina**
What were you doing here?
**[17:39] Kerin**
I was a small-time host.
**[17:41] Kerin**
I figured if I became number one,
then Elu-san might notice me.
**[17:45] Kerin**
So I brushed myself off, and worked hard.
**[17:48] Kerin**
But I was never able to beat that horse guy.
***SIGN*** Virtual
**[17:52] Kerin**
People would always request him.
**[17:55] Kerin**
Kept saying he was cute,
trying to confess to the sister...
**[17:58] Hime**
So you couldn't win, quit being a host,
and became a drunk.
**[18:03] Hime**
That's not the Kerin I know!
I'm so disappointed in you!
**[18:06] Hime**
What happened to all your energy?!
**[18:08] Hime**
Shoot a few missiles at us or something!
**[18:12] Kerin**
You keep talking...
**[18:14] Kerin**
Did you really think I didn't
do anything else in this city?
**[18:18] Kerin**
Fine, then... I'll show you!
**[18:20] Kerin**
Too late to change your mind!
**[18:22] Hina**
Th-This might be bad...
**[18:24] Hina**
I can sense an intense night energy!
**[18:26] Kerin**
Super Mega Liquor Magic!
**[18:29] Kerin**
Buchichamp de'Oom!
***SIGN*** Buchichamp de'Oom
**[18:30] Kerin**
Time to drink the night away!
**[18:33] Hina**
That's total host magic!
**[18:35] Hina**
If that thing hits us we're going
to get drunk and have hangovers!
**[18:39] Hina**
We're underage, though! This is a bad matchup!
**[18:42] Hina**
We need to deflect it, Hime!
**[18:43] Hime**
Okay! Ready, and...
**[18:45] Hime**
Ukon Shield!
***SIGN*** Ukon
***SIGN*** Shield
**[18:50] Mito**
The latest and greatest...
**[18:52] Kerin**
What is this?!
**[18:54] Hime**
It... It can't be...
**[18:55] Hina**
That looks like...
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:07] Uma**
Please! I need to talk to you today, Sister.
**[19:10] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:12] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:12] Uma**
Well the thing is—
**[19:19] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:20] Sora**
People from Kansai always say
"but I dunno" after everything, right?
**[19:23] Sister**
Some certainly do.
**[19:25] Sora**
So do they know? Or not? Which is it?!
**[19:28] Sister**
What makes you ask that, Sora-san?
**[19:30] Sora**
I asked a friend of mine
from Kansai questions.
**[19:32] Sora**
I got a really serious answer,
and at first I was impressed.
**[19:35] Sora**
But then at the end there
was a "but I dunno"! So I told her!
**[19:40] Sora**
"Make up yer friggin' mind!"
**[19:42] Sister**
Oh my, now you've got the accent, too.
**[19:45] Sister**
But Sora-san, they're not trying to
avoid responsibility by saying that.
**[19:49] Sora**
Really?
**[19:50] Sister**
They're trying to impart to you that
it's only their personal opinion,
**[19:52] Sister**
and that they have no
hard basis for their claims,
**[19:55] Sister**
so that you should probably
look into the issue more seriously.
**[19:57] Sora**
I get it!
**[19:58] Sora**
I better apologize to my
friend I snapped at, then!
**[20:03] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:05] Uma**
"But I dunno" is a type of politeness!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:11] Sister**
God bless you.
**[20:14] Sister**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[20:17] Hina**
Okay, we've got a letter here, everybody!
**[20:20] Hina**
It's from someone with
the pen name "Hello, everyone!"
**[20:23] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:26] Hina**
"Lately, I've fallen down a VTuber hole!"
**[20:29] Hina**
"Are there any newer VTubers you would
recommend to a neophyte like me?"
**[20:34] Hina**
It says!
**[20:35] Akari**
Oh, oh, me!
**[20:36] Akari**
Well, do you guys know...
**[20:39] Akari**
There's this one called "Mirai Akari."
**[20:41] Shiro**
Never heard of him.
**[20:41] Mito**
Doesn't ring a bell.
***SIGN*** This is going to run long, so we'll have the
six of them each recommend a VTuber
**[20:48] Akari**
I'd say Pinky Pop Hepburn-chan!
***SIGN*** Mirai Akari's
Recommended VTuber
Pinky Pop
Hepburn
***SIGN*** Big Boobs (?)
***SIGN*** Cyber Girl Siro's
Recommended VTuber
Unity-chan
**[20:53] Shiro**
I'd say Unity-chan!
**[20:58] Hime**
I want to introduce
people to Ginga Alice-chan!
***SIGN*** Tanaka Hime's
Recommended VTuber
Ginga Alice
***SIGN*** Invading Alien
***SIGN*** Suzuki Hina's
Recommended VTuber
Tomari Mari
**[21:04] Hina**
I'm actually really into a guy who reincarnated
as Tomari Mari-chan, at the moment.
***SIGN*** A Reincarnated Guy
**[21:08] Hinata**
Do you guys know Kafu-chan?
***SIGN*** Nekomiya Hinata's
Recommended VTuber
Kafu
***SIGN*** Studying for Exams!
**[21:11] Everbody**
Oh, yeah!
**[21:13] Mito**
I recommend Marie Android.
***SIGN*** Tsukino Mito's
Recommended VTuber
Marie Android
***SIGN*** Her Eyes Are Wide Open
**[21:16] Mito**
Her eyes are always really wide open.
**[21:19] Hina**
Well, pen name "Hello, everybody!"
**[21:20] Hina**
I hope you take a look at the
VTubers we recommended today
**[21:24] Hina**
and fall down a whole bunch of new holes!
**[21:27] Hina**
And so, until next week,
**[21:29] Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:09] Omega Sisters**
Hey, hey, hey there! Everybody feeling Omega?!
***SIGN*** Omega Sisters
**[23:12] Rei**
I'm Omega Rei!
**[23:12] Rio**
And I'm Omega Rio!
**[23:13] Rei**
We're here to do the next episode preview
for the finale of *Virtual-san - Looking*.
**[23:19] Rio**
Wow, amazing.
**[23:20] Rei**
Next time is the finale!
The last episode, Rio.
**[23:22] Rio**
The last one!
**[23:24] Rio**
But they didn't tell us what happens,
so we can't tell you anything!
**[23:27] Rei**
Yeah.
**[23:27] Rio**
Right?
**[23:28] Rei**
Y'know, this title reminds me of something.
**[23:30] Rio**
You're not supposed to point out the parodies!
**[23:32] Rei**
Ah, it'll be fine.
**[23:33] Rio**
Yeah, I think so. Sure.
**[23:34] Both**
Next time is
"The Disappearance of Virtual-san."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"The Disappearance of Virtual-san"
**[23:36] Both**
And Virtual-san will be
looking next week, too!
# E12 - The Disappearance of Virtual-san
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6QWEKJ36/the-disappearance-of-virtual-san)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Peanut**
Today's the final episode!
**[00:03] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Anything you wanna say in the end?
**[00:05] Peanut**
Thanks for the last three months!
**[00:07] Uma**
There's another episode
on the Blu-rays, too!
**[00:09] Peanut**
You're gonna advertise now?!
You horsey bastard!
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Final Episode
**[00:15] Mito**
He's the one who will determine whether
or not this world can change.
**[00:25] Hinata**
Bye-bye.
**[00:31] Hina**
That new world...
**[00:33] Hime**
I wish we could've seen it.
**[00:38] Shiro**
Thank you for trying so hard.
**[00:42] Mito**
We will never forget you.
**[00:51] Akari**
But I'm sure that...
**[00:58] All**
You can do it!
**[01:05] Giant Mob**
What the—?!
**[01:14] Robo**
What is this? What's going on?
**[01:17] Hime**
All right!
**[01:18] Hinata**
Good work!
**[01:20] Hina**
I knew you could pull it off!
**[01:22] Akari**
All right, let's do this!
**[01:24] Mito**
Please, listen to this!
**[01:25] Shiro**
It's our...
**[01:26] Shiro**
Virtual Real song!
**[03:17] Hikari**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:22] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[03:26] Granny**
Idaten bashiri.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase
Idaten Bashiri
**[03:28] Granny**
That's the phrase.
**[03:31] Granny**
It has a simple meaning, which
is to run a great distance.
**[03:35] Granny**
But there are limits to what
human limbs can manage.
**[03:38] Granny**
And as a result, humanity came
across the idea of transportation.
**[03:43] Granny**
And among them all, the Shinkansen,
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[03:47] Granny**
which started operating in 1964,
might be the most amazing.
**[03:51] Granny**
Then you have automobiles, which grew into
a type of vehicle that anyone can use,
**[03:55] Granny**
and the completion of the
high-speed roadways in 1965.
**[04:00] Granny**
As for me, I got my license
right away when I turned 20.
**[04:04] Granny**
And I just couldn't get enough of driving!
**[04:07] Granny**
Back then, the toll was 100 yen,
regardless of where you used it.
**[04:10] Granny**
I used to drive down the highway
a lot by myself in those days.
**[04:14] Granny**
I just enjoyed the act of driving.
**[04:18] Granny**
I can still move, too! Look at this!
Impressive, isn't it?
**[04:22] Granny**
I can even drive while doing backflips.
**[04:25] Granny**
Because I'm virtual, you see,
I can do anything!
**[04:31] Granny**
Now this is idaten bashiri!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[04:40] Subaru**
I'm Subaru Ingram, an incubus.
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Subaru Ingram
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[04:45] Subaru**
I might look like a girl,
**[04:48] Subaru**
but I really am a boy!
**[04:56] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[05:00] Hinata**
Hey, Virtual-san is looking.
**[05:06] Gori**
Aoi-san, here we have a button.
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:09] Aoi**
Right.
**[05:10] Gori**
And if you press it,
you'll get a hundred million yen.
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:13] Aoi**
Right.
**[05:13] Gori**
But in exchange,
Fuji Aoi Park will be destroyed.
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:17] Aoi**
Okay.
**[05:18] Gori**
Would you press that button? Or...
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:25] Gori**
Wait, but... destruction?
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:28] Aoi**
Okay!
**[05:30] Aoi**
That oughta be good for a billion, I think.
**[05:31] Gori**
I suppose so...
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:32] Aoi**
Okay, time to grab something tasty to eat!
**[05:35] Aoi**
The bananas are on me!
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:36] Gori**
Only bananas?
**[05:37] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[05:39] Gori**
Hello.
**[05:42] Hinata**
Big trouble, big trouble!
**[05:44] Hinata**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[05:47] Hinata**
Real big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[05:55] Akari**
Hinata! So it's your turn. What's up?
**[06:00] Hinata**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[06:03] Akari**
And what's that?
**[06:05] Hinata**
Someone with the pen name
"Rocky-kun" is in trouble.
**[06:07] Hinata**
Here, check it out.
**[06:09] Akari**
Okay. Let's see, "Hello Akari-san."
**[06:11] Hinata**
Hello.
**[06:12] Akari**
H'lo!
**[06:13] Akari**
"I have a YouTube channel, but I don't
stand out, and it's really difficult."
***SIGN*** [Advice] Here me out
**[06:18] Akari**
"How can I develop the kind of
quirk that would make it
**[06:21] Akari**
so that anyone would remember
me after a single video?"
**[06:23] Hinata**
I get how he feels.
***SIGN*** Problem: How can I
be memorable?
**[06:25] Akari**
Y'know, even we had trouble with this.
**[06:27] Hinata**
Everyone worries about it.
**[06:31] Akari**
What to do...?
**[06:33] Hinata**
Huh? Mirai-san?
**[06:35] Hinata**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[06:38] Yami**
You just need to be provocative!
**[06:41] Hikari**
Like drinking a whole cola at once?
**[06:44] Yami**
How the hell does that provoke anyone?!
**[06:46] Yami**
You need something with sex and violence,
or no one will care!
**[06:50] Hikari**
Oh, no!
**[06:51] Hikari**
If you do that, you're bound to get
complaints from all over the place!
**[06:56] Yami**
The squeaky wheel gets the grease!
**[06:58] Yami**
That's part of standing out.
**[07:01] Hikari**
That might be true, but...
**[07:03] Hikari**
I'm sorry, Akari, you have to handle this!
**[07:08] Hinata**
Hello! Mirai-san?
**[07:11] Akari**
Oh, sorry about that.
**[07:13] Akari**
I almost fell asleep.
**[07:15] Hinata**
Good morning, then!
**[07:16] Akari**
Morning!
**[07:18] Akari**
Pen name Rocky-kun! Here's the bottom line!
**[07:23] Hinata**
Is this finally it? Her bottom... line?
**[07:27] Akari**
You need to be from the future!
**[07:30] Akari**
I mean, there's no one from
the future who's a YouTuber!
**[07:33] Akari**
Someone like that would know
the winning lotto numbers
**[07:35] Akari**
and which horses would win their races!
**[07:38] Akari**
That's one heck of a gimmick!
**[07:40] Hinata**
Okay, okay, okay.
**[07:42] Akari**
"Something shocking will happen
to the world in a year..."
**[07:45] Akari**
"Oh, but if I say any more,
it'll alter the timeline!"
**[07:48] Akari**
You say stuff like that and
your views will blow up!
**[07:52] Hinata**
I can see why, but y'know,
**[07:55] Hinata**
I think it'd be impossible to get away
with claiming to be from the future.
**[07:58] Akari**
Impossible, she says! You never know!
**[08:02] Akari**
In another few decades,
there might be time machines!
**[08:05] Hinata**
Y-You've got a point! That might happen!
**[08:07] Akari**
Which is why if Rocky-kun
waits until he's a grandpa,
**[08:11] Akari**
I'm sure he'll be able to make his
debut as the YouTuber from future!
**[08:14] Hinata**
But when it actually gets to be that era,
**[08:17] Hinata**
everyone else might hop into time machines
to become YouTubers from the future, too.
**[08:25] Akari**
When that happens, uh...
**[08:29] Akari**
He can dye his hair blond!
**[08:30] Hinata**
H-How unique!
**[08:32] Akari**
So focus on keeping your hair until the
time machine is ready in the meantime!
**[08:37] Hinata**
I see!
**[08:44] Hinata**
A blond YouTuber from the future!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[09:03] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[09:06] Hinata**
I can see a man at the end of this road.
**[09:08] Hinata**
And in front of him is a little girl.
**[09:10] Hinata**
If he's some kind of old creep...
**[09:13] Hinata**
Should I toss a grenade before
that girl gets traumatized?
**[09:16] Hinata**
No, she could get caught in the blast.
**[09:19] Hinata**
And a SMG wouldn't be accurate
at this distance.
**[09:23] Hinata**
I think I'd better pop
smoke to conceal that guy,
**[09:26] Hinata**
and then have the girl
evacuate in the meantime.
**[09:33] Girl**
Papa!
**[09:35] Hinata**
I almost slaughtered her old man!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[09:42] Hina**
Yo, yo, yo! Virtual-san is looking!
Yo, yo, yo!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[09:51] Shiro**
Oh, it's Virtual-san... Welcome!
**[09:55] Uma**
I am so fed up!
**[09:58] Uma**
Can I get some trivia about horses, please?
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[10:05] Shiro**
Horses...
**[10:06] Shiro**
Y'know, the part of horses that
seems like it would be knee
**[10:09] Shiro**
is actually more comparable
to the human wrist,
**[10:11] Shiro**
which means what looks like a shin is really
a middle finger pointing down all the time.
**[10:15] Shiro**
And their hooves are sort of like something
**[10:18] Shiro**
that evolved out of their middle fingernail.
**[10:21] Shiro**
Horses also have incredible eyes.
**[10:25] Shiro**
It's said that humans have a
200 degree range of vision,
**[10:28] Shiro**
but horses can see a range up to 350 degrees!
**[10:32] Shiro**
If you try to play, "Guess who?"
with them, they'll see you coming!
**[10:36] Shiro**
By the way, the saying
"has blinders on" comes from horses
**[10:39] Shiro**
who were only allowed to see
what was in front of them,
**[10:44] Shiro**
and means that you're focused on a single
thing, to the exclusion of everything else.
**[10:50] Shiro**
I wish there was a horse I knew who
could work like he had blinders on.
**[10:58] Virtual**
Wow, really?
**[11:01] Virtual**
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-chan!
**[11:04] Shiro**
Stop flipping me off.
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[11:09] Mito**
I sent her that picture of protein,
but will she actually show up?
***SIGN*** Shizurin appeared!
**[11:16] Rin**
Mito-san!
**[11:18] Rin**
Is it true there are ripped gentlemen
enthusiastically enjoying protein here?!
**[11:22] Mito**
Shizurin-senpai, you're dumber than I thought.
**[11:24] Mito**
All we have here is the protein.
**[11:26] Mito**
God damn!
**[11:29] Mito**
Now then, Shizurin-senpai, it's time for
our ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[11:33] Rin**
Again?
**[11:35] Mito**
Here's our subject for today!
**[11:37] Mito**
If you had to pick, which would you prefer?
**[11:39] Mito**
A) Spend an entire day hunched over,
**[11:41] Mito**
B) Spend an entire day
standing on your toes.
**[11:42] ---**
Standing on my toes...
**[11:44] ---**
Yes.
**[11:44] Rin**
I'd rather not do either,
but I guess I'd pick tiptoes.
**[11:49] Mito**
Oh, I was thinking of saying that, too.
**[11:51] Rin**
That's fine, isn't it? We can match, then.
**[11:52] Mito**
No, no, the segment would end in that case!
**[11:53] Rin**
Nice and tidy!
**[11:54] Mito**
Let's try it to see for sure.
**[11:56] Mito**
I'll stand on my tiptoes,
**[11:58] Mito**
and Shizurin-senpai will hunch over,
and we'll converse about something!
**[12:00] Rin**
That's unfair. Totally unfair, but...
**[12:02] Mito**
This is really killing my calves, though.
**[12:05] Rin**
But imagine having to spend
a whole day like this.
**[12:07] Mito**
Good point.
**[12:09] Rin**
Let's trade! I'll stand on my tip toes.
**[12:11] Mito**
No, no, wouldn't that mean
I'd have to hunch over?
**[12:13] Rin**
Right, exactly.
**[12:14] Mito**
I'm afraid that I can't,
for religious reasons.
**[12:16] Rin**
What religion is that?!
**[12:18] Rin**
If you're a real entertainer,
you need to try it out!
**[12:22] Mito**
Don't blame me if this goes badly, then.
**[12:23] Rin**
Stoop! Stoop!
**[12:26] Rin**
You know what, never mind! Never mind!
**[12:27] Mito**
I figured as much! Now, you see.
**[12:29] Rin**
I had to cover that up.
**[12:31] Mito**
When I hunch over, it's really
quite a sight, let me tell you!
**[12:34] Rin**
That was scary.
**[12:35] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[12:37] Mito**
That means our result is...
**[12:39] Mito**
B, spending all day on your tiptoes!
**[12:42] Rin**
Aw, no, come on, I really
don't want to do that, either!
**[12:46] Mito**
If you want to be a real VTuber,
**[12:47] Mito**
you need to know what you
are and aren't capable of!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[12:54] Hime**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[13:04] Unity**
I think I burned through five curry
croquettes' worth of calories!
**[13:07] Unity**
But I know you've got
them ready, don't you?!
**[13:10] Unity**
Come on, curry croquettes!
**[13:14] Unity**
There's so many!
**[13:19] Unity**
Lots and lots!
**[13:24] Unity**
Huh? A dream ending?
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[13:40] Kerin**
Wh-Who are you supposed to be?!
**[13:42] Mito**
Where's that bubbly at?
**[13:43] Hina**
Mito-chan?!
**[13:44] Mito**
Tanaka, Hina, I've come to rescue you two!
**[13:47] Hime**
Wh-Wh-What's going on here, Mitonator?!
**[13:50] Mito**
If the two of you are hit
with Buchichamp de'Oom,
**[13:52] Mito**
you'll develop an addiction
to hosts and go bankrupt.
**[13:54] Mito**
That's the kind of future that awaits.
**[13:55] Hina**
What the heck? That's scary.
**[13:57] Mito**
I've come from the future to
prevent that from happening.
**[14:00] Hime & Hina**
M-Mitonator-sama!
**[14:03] Kerin**
Cut all the jibber-jabber!
**[14:05] Kerin**
You wasted all my Chandon.
**[14:07] Mito**
Silence!
**[14:08] Mito**
The real problem here is that you've
become a washed-up drunkard!
**[14:12] Kerin**
Y'know, booze... the thing with booze!
**[14:15] Kerin**
It's the only friend I have!
**[14:17] Kerin**
I'm gonna drink and drink
until it drinks me up!
***SIGN*** Buchichamp de'Oom
**[14:21] Mito**
What kind of vulgar sorcery is this?!
**[14:23] Hina**
Mito-chan, get clear!
**[14:24] Mito**
No, I can deal with this with my own magic!
**[14:28] Mito**
Selphshield!
**[14:30] Hime**
That's the most advanced type
of barrier magic, Selphshield!
**[14:34] Mitoshield**
The refined class prez!
**[14:36] Kerin**
Impossible! My Chandon!
**[14:38] Kerin**
All the work I've done since
coming to the city...
**[14:41] Kerin**
If it's come to this...
I'll use Buchitema.
**[14:43] Hina**
Wait, Kerin!
**[14:44] Hina**
She knows Elu-san, y'know!
**[14:46] Kerin**
Elu...san?!
**[14:48] Mito**
Oh, you want to see Elu-san?
**[14:50] Kerin**
I can... see her?
**[14:52] Mito**
I see. This might actually be good medicine
to cure your sorry state of affairs.
**[14:56] Mito**
Tanaka, Hina-san, could the two
of you lend me your strength?
**[14:59] Mito**
We'll call Elu-san here!
**[15:01] Hime**
We're going to use that
ultimate spell, right!
**[15:03] Hina**
Okay! You got it!
**[15:05] Mito**
To our elf, who art in Heaven.
**[15:07] Mito**
By your blessing, let our foolish comrade
who has fallen to evil be saved.
**[15:12] Hime & Hina**
Super Ultimate Mega Summoning,
Elu-Elu Essaim!
**[15:16] Hime & Hina**
Hao!
**[15:22] Elu**
Chomp, chomp, chomp...
**[15:23] Elu**
I was eating dinner.
**[15:25] Elu**
Hi everybody, Elu here!
**[15:28] Hime**
Did we interrupt a meal?
**[15:30] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[15:31] Kerin**
So big!
**[15:32] Kerin**
A giant Elu-san!
**[15:34] Mito**
Elu-san, sorry to trouble
you during your dinner,
**[15:36] Mito**
but could you purify this fellow?
**[15:38] Elu**
Well, my food's gonna get cold!
**[15:41] Elu**
But leave it to Elu!
**[15:43] Hina**
She's so mellow!
**[15:44] Kerin**
P-Purify?! Don't be ridiculous!
**[15:47] Kerin**
I've become a part of this city.
My heart's been stained black.
**[15:50] Elu**
Kerin-san! I'm gonna blow you away!
**[15:54] Elu**
Ultimate purifying magic, Mesareru!
**[16:00] Kerin**
A warm light...
**[16:01] Elu**
It's okay now. I'm sure you're tired.
**[16:04] Elu**
You tried your best!
**[16:06] Elu**
Munch, munch, munch...
**[16:07] Mito**
Elu-san, please focus on the purification!
**[16:12] Elu**
Anyway, hurry up and be purified!
**[16:14] Kerin**
Elu-san—!
**[16:20] Kerin**
No! Not there—!
**[16:24] Hina**
Kerin vanished!
**[16:25] Elu**
I sent him to Heaven!
**[16:27] Elu**
Now if you don't mind,
I'm getting back to dinner!
**[16:30] Elu**
Bye-bye!
**[16:31] Mito**
That about does it, I'd say.
**[16:33] Hina**
Gotta say, the city can be a scary place.
**[16:35] Mito**
Indeed.
**[16:36] Mito**
But since we're all here, Tanaka, Hina-san,
**[16:40] Mito**
why don't we try one of
those champagne towers?
**[16:42] Hime**
Sounds good!
**[16:44] Hime**
I wanna stack the glasses!
**[16:46] Hina**
Mito-chan, you've got a chant, right?
**[16:48] Mito**
You wanna hear it? Do you?
You ready? Should I?
**[16:49] Mito**
Ready, set, go!
**[16:52] Mito**
Even in a world that's purely virtual!
**[16:55] Mito**
Your love is real!
**[16:57] Mito**
And right now, right here, we'll prove it!
**[16:59] Mito**
Real money doesn't lie! One order
of Buchichamp de'Oom, coming up!
**[17:03] Hime & Hina**
Thank you very much!
**[17:07] Kerin**
Elu-san, I'm on my way!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
***SIGN*** The End
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[17:18] Uma**
Sister, please hear me out.
**[17:20] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[17:22] Uma**
Well, you see...
**[17:25] Uma**
Is this happening? I can do it!
**[17:27] Uma**
Please, listen, sister!
**[17:28] Sister**
What is it?
**[17:30] Uma**
I... I...
**[17:32] Uma**
Huh?
**[17:33] Sister**
What's the matter?
**[17:35] Uma**
After being knocked aside 11 times,
I've forgotten my confession.
**[17:39] Sister**
Oh, dear.
**[17:40] Sora**
I'm gonna blow him away!
**[17:42] Uma**
My inability to confess when the time is
right is almost like my own coughbtl—
**[17:52] Sora**
Listen, sister!
**[17:53] Sister**
What is it?
**[17:54] Sora**
I need some advice on something.
**[17:56] Sister**
How can I help?
**[17:58] Sora**
I can't think of anything else to confess!
**[18:00] Uma**
Then what are you doing here?!
**[18:01] Sister**
Is that it?
**[18:03] Sister**
If nothing weighs upon your conscience,
that is a good thing.
**[18:07] Sora**
But if I've got nothing to confess,
I can't come and see you.
**[18:11] Sister**
I am always here, so you can
come and see me when you like.
**[18:15] Sora**
Thank you, sister!
**[18:18] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[18:20] Uma**
I remember! I remembered
my confession! Sister—!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:29] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[18:41] Akari**
Himehina! Whatcha doing?
**[18:43] Hime**
Everyone! Hao!
**[18:45] Akari**
Hello!
**[18:46] Shiro**
Sup, supo!
**[18:46] Hinata**
Hi!
**[18:46] Mito**
Good day.
**[18:48] Hina**
Since the weather's nice,
we were doing dance practice.
**[18:51] Mito**
I see. What an energetic finale it'll be!
**[18:53] Hinata**
Already the last episode, huh?
It's been fun.
**[18:57] Shiro**
I know, we should thank everyone
who stuck around to the end!
**[19:02] Everyone**
Good idea!
**[19:03] Mito**
Well said, Siro-san!
**[19:08] Akari**
To everybody who watched these three months!
**[19:11] Akari**
Thank you very much!
**[19:13] Shiro**
We're really grateful for all the
messages of support we received!
**[19:17] Hime**
It'd be great if even more Virtual-sans
could be in anime in the future!
**[19:22] Hina**
You can look forward to seeing the evolution
of virtual anime from here on out!
**[19:26] Hinata**
And this is farewell until we meet again.
**[19:30] Mito**
And this message goes out to you,
who might be lonely!
**[19:32] Mito**
Here we go.
**[19:33] Mito**
It's okay!
**[21:16] Akari**
Here we go!
**[21:17] Akari**
"The Walking Free Directory!"
**[21:19] Hina**
Can I bring you home with me tonight?
**[21:22] Shiro**
Okey-dokey!
**[21:23] Shiro**
Sharpening a knife...
**[21:24] Hina**
Who you supposed to be?
**[21:26] Hina**
Winter, for you, hot water for stew!
**[21:28] Hinata**
I wouldn't say that!
**[21:30] Mito**
The latest and greatest...
**[21:32] Mito**
Transcendentally—
**[22:58] Akari**
Ready, and...
**[22:59] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking!