# Season 1
# E1 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GY2422V9R/untitled)
Translator:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Uma**
This is Virtual Town.
**[00:04] Uma**
I'm Uma.
**[00:06] Uma**
A humanoid horse.
**[00:07] Uma**
Or maybe an equine human?
**[00:08] Uma**
Either way, I'm a horse that talks a lot.
**[00:11] Uma**
In this virtual world, there are
lots of special people like me.
**[00:15] Uma**
For example, there's a
peanut that talks a lot,
**[00:17] Uma**
a guy who pretends to be a beautiful girl,
**[00:19] Uma**
and this dude who's always
shooting off missiles.
**[00:20] Uma**
Grandmas, gorillas, raccoon dog
ninjas, Hello **** and a st****—
**[00:24] Uma**
Actually, I had better leave it at
that, before we get in trouble.
**[00:28] Uma**
Yep!
**[00:30] Uma**
And right now, passing in
front of us, is Mirai Akari.
***SIGN*** Mirai Akari
**[00:34] Uma**
She's a sexy, upbeat older girl who's
constantly sexually harassing her juniors.
**[00:38] Akari**
Puberty, yeah!
**[00:41] Uma**
This is Cyber Girl Siro.
***SIGN*** Cyber Girl Siro
**[00:43] Uma**
She is *not* the crazy psychopathic
combat AI, Siro Iruka.
**[00:47] Uma**
An intensely cute, classy idol.
**[00:50] Siro**
Oh boy, fresh prey!
**[00:54] Narration**
The girl with the strange walk is the
red half of HIMEHINA, Tanaka Hime.
***SIGN*** Tanaka Hime
**[00:58] Narration**
A chortling girl who never stops talking.
**[01:00] Hime**
Time for the rumbly crab shuffle!
**[01:05] Uma**
On her tail is the girl with the
slightly sexy exposed midriff...
***SIGN*** Suzuki Hina
**[01:09] Uma**
The blue half of HIMEHINA, Suzuki Hina.
**[01:12] Hina**
Hime! You're flashing your panties!
Cover that up!
**[01:14] ---**
There's broadcast standards!
**[01:16] Hinata**
Ow...
**[01:17] Uma**
The one who just fell right now is
the low-energy tomboy, Nekomiya Hinata.
***SIGN*** Nekomiya Hinata
**[01:21] Uma**
She has first rate skill at shooters,
but her tank top is super loose.
**[01:26] Hinata**
That really hurt... but I've
got video games waiting for me.
**[01:31] Uma**
Last up is the class president
with long, black hair, Tsukino Mito.
***SIGN*** Tsukino Mito
**[01:34] Uma**
She often tries to show her
superiority to all of Virtual Town,
**[01:38] Uma**
but unfortunately, she's a total small fry.
**[01:39] Mito**
Now, everyone, you mustn't run like that.
**[01:41] Mito**
You must elegantly walk like I do,
with your knees knocked. Like this!
**[01:47] Uma**
Looks like it's going to be another
fun day in the virtual world today!
**[01:51] Uma**
Yep!
**[01:56] Akari**
Okay girls, gather around!
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[01:58] Akari**
Meeting time!
**[01:59] Akari**
We've got a meeting!
**[02:00] Hinata**
A meeting?
**[02:02] Hime**
What kind of meeting?
Where we show off our underwear?
**[02:04] Akari**
No, Tanaka!
**[02:05] Shiro**
I know! I bet it's a meeting where
Akari-chan shares her lust with all of us!
**[02:10] Hime**
That's great!
**[02:12] Akari & Hina**
Would that be great?
**[02:13] Mito**
It's true that in the virtual world I am
treated as the classiest of the classy,
**[02:16] Mito**
in respect for my overwhelming classiness,
**[02:19] Mito**
but if by interacting with
the incarnation of libido
**[02:21] ---**
that is Akari-san, I can develop more...
**[02:22] Mito**
Then I can hardly see how a love scene
or two wouldn't be worth the cost—
**[02:25] Hime**
It's true that in the virtual world,
I am treated as the leggiest of the leggy,
**[02:28] ---**
in respect for my overwhelming legginess,
**[02:31] Hime**
so interacting with the incarnation of libido
that is Akari-san isn't the worst thing.
**[02:34] Shiro**
It's true that in the virtual world
I am treated as the queen of killers,
**[02:37] ---**
in respect for my overwhelming
skill at murder—
**[02:39] Akari**
Oh, never mind, then!
**[02:41] Akari**
Look, I get it, everybody,
but let's calm down.
**[02:43] Akari**
Because I actually have a huge announcement!
**[02:46] Akari**
It turns out that we're...
**[02:48] Shiro**
Oh, is this about the anime?
**[02:49] Hina**
Oh, I heard about that.
**[02:51] Hinata**
Akari-chan, you're lagging real bad.
**[02:52] Hime**
Seriously, we're already on the air.
See, the camera's over there, right?
**[02:55] Mito**
Hello, everyone! Are you watching?
**[02:56] Hina**
Hey, I think it's almost time!
**[02:58] Shiro**
Oh, already?
**[02:59] Shiro**
Gather around, gather around!
**[03:00] Hime**
Go, go!
**[03:01] Girls**
Okay, okay, okay!
**[03:02] Girls**
Hang on, hang on!
**[03:04] Shiro**
Okay, here we go!
**[03:05] Shiro**
Ready and...
**[03:07] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[04:52] Akari**
V-V-V-V...
**[04:54] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[05:08] Haruto**
It is a time of inter-galactic
war in the virtual world.
**[05:11] Haruto**
We will invade other virtual nations,
**[05:13] Haruto**
and in time, unify the galaxy...
**[05:14] Haruto**
Under our Game Club Empire!
**[05:17] Miria**
Shut it, Harutrash!
**[05:18] Miria**
Or do you want to go out the airlock?
**[05:19] Haruto**
Do you want me to kill you, pink fool?
**[05:21] Chief**
Okay you two, no fighting!
**[05:23] Ryo**
Chief, are we really going to try and
conquer the galaxy like Haru-kun says?
**[05:27] Chief**
Yep! We have to improve our ratings
in different virtual nations
**[05:30] ---**
so that we can rise to the top!
**[05:32] Ryo**
Wow, ratings still apply here?
**[05:33] Miria**
Hey Kaede-chan, I came up with a plan!
**[05:36] Chief**
Well, what is it? Tell me!
**[05:37] Miria**
I call it "The Titanic Game
Club Conquers the Galaxy!"
***SIGN*** The Titanic Game Club
Conquers the Galaxy
**[05:41] Ryo**
It's the direct approach where we become
titans who overwhelm our enemies, right?
**[05:45] Haruto**
I see you understand something, pink fool!
**[05:47] Haruto**
Power is everything!
**[05:48] Haruto**
With enough power,
your enemies will never outdo you!
**[05:51] Chief**
How do we become titans, though?
**[05:52] Miria**
I found out the other day!
**[05:54] Miria**
Apparently in space, if you bite your
own thumb, you can turn into a titan!
**[05:59] Haruto**
To think it was so simple!
**[06:01] Haruto**
Then let's begin!
**[06:04] Haruto**
I actually grew!
**[06:06] Chief**
I'll do it, too!
**[06:09] Ryo**
I wonder if it'll work for me!
**[06:11] Ryo**
I grew!
**[06:12] Miria**
You all did it!
**[06:14] Miria**
I had better go, too!
**[06:15] Voice**
*Congratulations to you.*
**[06:16] Miria**
Right, this is how it worked last time.
**[06:18] Chief**
Looks like we're all set to go.
**[06:20] Chief**
Time to invade some enemy nations!
**[06:22] Narration**
*Thank you for riding with us.*
**[06:22] Haruto**
What?!
**[06:23] Haruto**
Something's happening to my body...
**[06:25] Chief**
Huh? Why'd you all shrink?
**[06:27] Chief**
Is this treachery?!
**[06:28] Miria**
That's weird. I think it must be hereditary.
**[06:31] Miria**
You have good genetics, Kaede-chan!
**[06:33] Chief**
How could you all be so mean
and leave me like this?!
**[06:36] Miria**
Kaede-chan!
**[06:37] Voice**
*Congratulations to you.*
**[06:38] Ryo**
Miria-chan!
**[06:39] Haruto**
Pink fool!
**[06:41] Chief**
I don't want to be stuck like this!
I want to turn back!
**[06:45] Ryo**
Chief, wait a second—
**[06:46] Voice**
*Congratulations to you.*
**[06:48] Haruto**
Impossible... To obliterate
us after a mere two blows...
**[06:51] Haruto**
Ch-Chief, calm down for a second.
**[06:53] Chief**
They're all gone... You want to
be with them, don't you, Haruto?
**[06:56] Haruto**
S-Stop, please! Stay away, no!
**[06:59] Voice**
*Happy New Year.*
**[07:02] Chief**
Everybody's gone...
**[07:03] Chief**
The road to the Game Club's
conquest is still a long one.
**[07:13] All**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[07:17] Granny**
Ryugen Higo.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Ryugen
Higo
**[07:19] Granny**
It's a term for baseless rumors.
**[07:22] Granny**
It naturally refers to rumors that are
being spread that have no basis in reality.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[07:30] Granny**
In 1973, there was a toilet paper panic.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Ryugen Higo
**[07:35] Granny**
Because of the oil shock at the time,
**[07:37] ---**
the government announced there
would be paper rationing.
**[07:42] Granny**
And because of that, people started to
fear they would run out of toilet paper,
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[07:46] ---**
and as a result began
buying it up excessively.
**[07:51] Granny**
At the time, I...
**[07:54] ---**
had just turned twenty, I think.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[07:59] Granny**
You'd go to the bathroom in a department
store or use a public bathroom,
**[08:02] ---**
and there'd be no toilet paper!
**[08:05] Granny**
Can you imagine the kind of shock that'd be?
**[08:08] Granny**
If you went to a public restroom,
**[08:11] ---**
your only choice would be to
pray-per for paper! Get it?
***SIGN*** "Pray-per for Paper"
**[08:14] Granny**
Prayer for a square, if you would.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Ryugen Higo
**[08:27] Mito**
What is with you?! It's not like virtual-san
is looking all the time, y'know!
***SIGN*** This segment is called
Let's Go! To Class
**[08:35] Akari**
I wish spring vacation
would get here already.
**[08:40] Hime**
We just got done with winter vacation!
In a rush much?
**[08:43] Shiro**
But you always tend to wonder when the next
vacation is after you finish one, don't you?
**[08:48] Akari**
I know what you mean!
Even if you got plenty of rest!
**[08:51] Akari**
You still end up wondering
when the next one is.
**[08:54] Hinata**
It's so easy to start slacking
off during vacation, too.
**[08:57] Hina**
I'm pretty sure you're always
slacking off, Hinata-chan.
**[08:59] Hinata**
You're wrong, Hina-chan.
**[09:01] Hinata**
I'm just practicing for
video games in my head.
**[09:03] Mito**
Well, during vacation I continue
my proper, disciplined lifestyle,
**[09:07] ---**
so I never notice much of a change.
**[09:08] Hime**
The classy life?
**[09:10] Mito**
Precisely.
**[09:10] Shiro**
Ah, the sound of class.
**[09:12] Akari**
That's impressive! Erotic, even!
**[09:14] Mito**
I-Is it?
**[09:15] Mito**
I think it's quite normal.
**[09:19] Hinata**
What? What was that?
**[09:21] Akari**
What was that shaking?!
And is it suddenly hot—
**[09:25] Shiro**
Hey, look outside!
**[09:26] Shiro**
Is that a volcano?
**[09:27] Hinata**
It's so hot!
**[09:29] Hinata**
I hate the heat. Can't stand it...
**[09:33] Hime**
Why's there a volcano outside the classroom?!
**[09:35] Hime**
The heat's gonna kill us! We better evacuate!
**[09:38] Hina**
Where do we evacuate?
There's lava everywhere outside!
**[09:41] Hina**
If we leave the building, we're dead!
**[09:43] Akari**
What should we do?
**[09:46] Akari**
Huh? Class Prez?
**[09:48] Akari**
Do you realize what's going on?!
**[09:50] Mito**
This is nothing remarkable.
It's no different than every day life.
**[09:53] Hime**
Uh, no, it's not!
There usually aren't volcanoes!
**[09:55] Mito**
What are a few volcanoes?
**[09:57] Mito**
If you watch movies, there are
bound to be volcanoes showing up.
**[09:59] Hinata**
So hot! Dying!
**[10:01] Mito**
It's totally normal, if you
think of it as a sauna.
**[10:04] Hina**
The volcano's erupting!
**[10:05] Mito**
Well, of course a volcano would erupt!
**[10:07] Mito**
Honestly, you're all
making far too much fuss.
**[10:09] Mito**
Just think of this as our usual classroom.
**[10:12] Akari**
Okay. The usual classroom...
**[10:15] Akari**
Hello!
**[10:16] Akari**
Good morning!
**[10:16] Others**
Good morning!
**[10:18] Akari**
Let's do our best today again, okay?
**[10:21] Akari**
Okay, this isn't working!
**[10:23] Akari**
It's so hot! I'm gonna die!
**[10:24] Mito**
You can't even manage that, Akari-san?
**[10:26] Shiro**
Uh, hey... is that... magma headed this way?
**[10:30] Mito**
That's right, Siro-san, the volcano
exploded and the magma shot forth,
**[10:34] ---**
so that's only natural.
***SIGN*** I'm gonna bring the heat!
**[10:38] Hinata**
This is bad! If we don't do something...
**[10:41] Hinata**
It's gonna hit us! We'll be killed!
**[10:42] Mito**
Oh, be quiet!
**[10:43] Mito**
A volcano explodes, shooting magma about,
and it's headed right for us!
**[10:47] Mito**
Of course we'd die! It's totally normal!
**[10:48] Mito**
Wait, is it normal to die like that?
**[10:50] Mito**
N-No, it's not!
**[10:51] Mito**
No!
**[10:52] Peanut**
Here it comes!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[11:05] Granny**
Grandmother is watching.
**[11:10] Aoi**
One-two, one-two, one-two, one-two...
**[11:12] Gori**
Hello... Hello... Hello...
**[11:16] Aoi**
Gori-chan, you've got a
spring in your step today!
**[11:18] Gori**
Hello!
**[11:19] Aoi**
Something good happen?
**[11:20] Gori**
Hello.
**[11:21] Aoi**
Did you win a lottery?
**[11:22] Gori**
Hello...
**[11:23] Aoi**
Did the total at checkout
turn out to be 777 yen?
**[11:26] Gori**
Hello?
**[11:28] Aoi**
I know! You lost some weight, right?
**[11:30] Aoi**
You seem lighter!
**[11:31] Gori**
Yesterday, I was peeling a banana, right?
Since I'm on a diet.
**[11:36] Aoi**
Damn, Gori-chan, you're such a lady!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[11:40] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
**[11:42] Gori**
Hello.
**[11:43] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[11:49] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[11:53] Akari**
What is it, Hime?!
**[11:55] Hime**
Mirai-san! We've got really big trouble!
**[11:57] Akari**
What, what is it?!
**[11:58] Hime**
Someone with the pen name
"Takeru-kun" is in trouble!
**[12:01] Hime**
Here, read it already!
**[12:04] Akari**
"Akari-san, hello."
**[12:05] Akari**
Hello.
**[12:06] Akari**
"The other day, I had a
meeting with my friend,"
**[12:09] Akari**
"but I overslept and was an hour late,
and they were furious."
**[12:12] Akari**
"They haven't talked to me since.
What should I do?"
**[12:15] Hime**
Such a hot voice!
**[12:17] Hime**
But y'know, people get so mad when
you oversleep and miss stuff!
**[12:20] Akari**
You've got a point there.
**[12:22] Akari**
Maybe he should buy some snacks.
**[12:23] Hime**
Snacks?!
***SIGN*** Akari MEMO
When you oversleep, bring snacks
**[12:24] Hime**
A peace offering?
**[12:25] Akari**
But what kind of snacks should
it be, what would be best?
**[12:28] Hime**
Maybe bales of rice?
**[12:31] Akari**
I get it! Just one bale, maybe!
**[12:33] Hime**
Just one!
**[12:34] Akari**
But in your case, Takeru, maybe take two.
**[12:36] Hime**
Good point.
**[12:38] Akari**
I get it, though.
Takeru-kun wants to make amends.
**[12:41] Hime**
Yeah, he wants to patch things up.
**[12:42] Akari**
I wonder what'd be best, then?
**[12:45] Hime**
Mirai-san?
**[12:47] ---**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[12:49] Hikari**
Oh, come on, there's only one real answer!
**[12:53] Hikari**
Since it was his fault, he should apologize!
**[12:56] Yami**
Who cares?
**[12:58] Yami**
What are you getting so
worked up for, Hikari?
**[13:00] Hikari**
Oh, stop that! Be quiet!
**[13:03] Yami**
Just ignore them.
**[13:04] Hikari**
You can't!
**[13:05] Hikari**
Please, don't say things
that'll only make it worse!
**[13:10] Yami**
Look, just take him to bed.
**[13:12] Hikari**
You can't give up your body so freely!
**[13:14] Yami**
Whatever. You handle it, then, Akari.
**[13:16] Hikari**
You can do it, Akari!
**[13:17] Hime**
Hello? Hello?! Mirai-san!
**[13:23] Akari**
Sorry, I was thinking too hard there!
**[13:25] Hime**
Well, good morning.
**[13:26] Akari**
Okay, to pen name Takeru-kun!
Here's the bottom line.
**[13:30] Hime**
Is this it?! She's going
to show her bottom! Line?
**[13:33] Akari**
To make up for last time,
you set up another meeting,
**[13:36] Akari**
and then oversleep by an hour again!
**[13:39] Hime**
Instead of being on time?!
**[13:40] Akari**
And then, you suddenly grab your friend when
they're about to angrily leave, from behind!
**[13:43] Akari**
And be like, "I'm sorry, the sight of
you standing there was just so lovely,
**[13:46] ---**
I was totally fixated and couldn't move."
Something like that!
**[13:49] Hime**
That seems really romantic,
but isn't it a little bold?!
***SIGN*** Virtual Kabuki-cho
**[13:52] Hime**
Is that okay?!
**[13:53] Akari**
And then, after getting worked up,
**[13:55] Akari**
the two of them start ****ing and ****ing,
**[13:57] Akari**
before vanishing into the lights
of late night Kabuki-cho!
**[14:00] Hime**
How lewd!
**[14:01] Akari**
Ain't it though, Tanaka?
**[14:03] Hime**
But it said "friend"! What if it's
one of Takeru-kun's male friends?
**[14:11] Hime**
Well, that'll do for today!
See you next time!
**[14:14] Akari**
Come again! Take care!
**[14:16] Akari**
Next time, I'll actually serve
you something to drink!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[14:26] Hinata**
It's almost time for a pork bowl,
**[14:28] Hinata**
almost time for a pork bowl...
**[14:35] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[14:37] Hinata**
It's near the end of the game.
Four survivors, including me.
**[14:40] Hinata**
From the sound of gunfire, I'm sure there
are two enemies at 1 and 11 o'clock.
**[14:44] Hinata**
There's a field in the center
of the area with good visibility.
**[14:48] Hinata**
I can't find the other one, though.
**[14:50] Hinata**
Is he in that house?
**[14:52] Hinata**
If I waltz out into the field, I'm going
to come under fire from three directions
**[14:57] Hinata**
and that'll be the end.
**[14:59] Hinata**
What do I do?
**[15:00] Hinata**
I have to think up a way to win!
**[15:04] Hinata**
I have to...
**[15:07] Akari**
Hinata!
**[15:08] Hinata**
I win!
**[15:09] Akari**
What's wrong?
**[15:09] Hinata**
Wait, no, not that...
**[15:10] Akari**
You look really intense.
**[15:12] Hinata**
A-A pork bowl!
**[15:13] Hinata**
I wanted to go get a pork bowl.
**[15:16] Akari**
Oh, I see.
**[15:17] Akari**
Well, they are yummy, right?
**[15:19] Akari**
See you!
**[15:21] Hinata**
See you... yeah.
**[15:24] Hinata**
Pork bowls are best for lunch.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[15:29] Kerin**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[15:31] Kerin**
Blow them away!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[15:38] Shiro**
Oh, it's Tsukino Mito-chan! Welcome!
**[15:41] Mito**
I am so fed up!
**[15:43] Mito**
Can I get some trivia on chocolate?
**[15:45] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[15:51] Shiro**
Chocolate!
**[15:52] Shiro**
They say that Columbus was the first
European to encounter chocolate.
**[15:57] Shiro**
But at the time chocolate
was just a bitter drink,
**[16:00] Shiro**
so he apparently had very
little interest in it!
**[16:02] Shiro**
Chocolate's also supposed to have
various positive health effects,
**[16:04] Shiro**
with a woman who was 122 before
passing away saying she would
**[16:09] ---**
eat 900 grams of chocolate a week.
**[16:12] Shiro**
One other thing, if you eat
chocolate and gum together,
**[16:14] Shiro**
the cocoa butter will melt the gum,
**[16:17] Shiro**
so it's generally recommended that
you don't have them together.
**[16:22] Mito**
Wow, is that true?
**[16:24] Mito**
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-san.
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Tsurumaki Kazuya
**[16:32] Lala**
My name is Mikurira Lala.
**[16:34] Lala**
My favorite foods are uncooked
ham and strawberries.
**[16:37] Lala**
My talents are the vaulting
horse and singing.
**[16:41] Lala**
It's nice to meet you all!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[16:49] Mito**
Now, I wonder who it's going to be today?
**[16:55] Mito**
You're Kenmochi Rikiya-san, right?
**[16:56] Sword**
It's Toya!
**[16:57] Mito**
Sorry, the kanji were so
similar that I got mixed up.
**[17:00] Toya**
Class Prez, what is this?
Why did you lock me in here?
**[17:02] Mito**
Silence, Kenmochi-san!
Let's get down to business.
**[17:05] Mito**
We're now going to begin the
ultimate decision committee.
**[17:08] Mito**
I wish you the best of luck in
choosing the correct answer.
**[17:10] Toya**
How bossy can you get?
**[17:12] Mito**
Here is today's subject!
***SIGN*** Subject: which kind of on-air trouble would you choose, as a streamer?
***SIGN*** A) Your drunken mother interrupts a stream.
***SIGN*** B) The game you were streaming turns out to be BL.
**[17:22] Toya**
B actually happened to you before, didn't it?
**[17:24] Mito**
That's right. I thought it
was a simple typing game,
**[17:27] ---**
and then all of a sudden a very
explicit BL scene appeared.
**[17:30] Mito**
Now, with that in mind,
which would you prefer?
**[17:34] Toya**
Good question. I guess I'd pick A,
your drunken mother interrupts a stream.
**[17:38] Mito**
That one?
**[17:39] Mito**
The sort of thing that used to
happen regularly with live streams.
**[17:43] Toya**
Right, and sometimes it actually
made the stream more entertaining.
**[17:45] Mito**
That kind of thing could often go viral.
**[17:47] Toya**
Right.
**[17:48] Mito**
And your drunken mother wouldn't be
likely to get you banned by barging in.
**[17:52] Toya**
Right. Whereas with the BL game, if it's
explicit enough, you could get banned for it.
**[17:56] Mito**
Right.
**[17:57] Mito**
What could a mother do to get
you banned, do you think?
**[18:00] Toya**
Well, if she's drunk, she could
suddenly start stripping.
**[18:04] Mito**
Nobody wants to see that.
**[18:06] Mito**
Oh, well, that's the bell for 3 PM,
so it's time to announce the correct answer.
**[18:09] ---**
The correct answer is B), the game you
were streaming turns out to be BL!
**[18:14] Toya**
Was there any point in even
getting my opinion then?
**[18:16] Mito**
Shut up! That's how I went viral, y'know!
**[18:18] Mito**
What kinda streamer is worried
about getting banned, anyway?!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[18:23] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[18:26] Shiro**
Don't you look, Uma!
**[18:29] Sora**
There's no stopping now!
Virtual-san is looking!
**[18:34] Kohaku**
Hey, I'm Otori Kohaku, 17 years old.
**[18:39] Kohaku**
Everyone calls me Unity-chan.
**[18:43] Kohaku**
As to why... aw, man!
**[18:47] Kohaku**
Come on!
**[18:49] Kohaku**
Stay away!
**[18:51] Kohaku**
Not the bamboo spear! No, no, no!
**[18:56] Kohaku**
Aw, man!
**[18:59] Kohaku**
Huh?
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[19:02] Kohaku**
Did I just stream that?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[19:07] Hina**
Hey, Hime, are there really dark
elves in a cave like this?
**[19:12] Hime**
One of the villagers said he
saw one leaving this cave.
**[19:16] Hina**
Did you ask Villager B, too?
**[19:17] Hime**
B was walking into a wall,
so I left him alone.
**[19:21] Hina**
Well, it'd be dangerous if
they were so close to an town.
**[19:25] Hime**
Right, so we have to do something about it!
**[19:27] Hina**
Hime, wait!
**[19:29] Hina**
There it is!
**[19:30] Hime**
It's a Keblin!
**[19:32] Hina**
Dummy! It noticed us!
**[19:34] Hime**
This is bad!
***SIGN*** For various reasons, we will be
presenting this segment in still images.
Next week, look forward
to the full animated version.
**[19:36] Hina**
This is really bad!
**[19:38] Hina**
Ninnomono!
**[19:40] Hime**
That was amazing, Hina-chan!
**[19:41] Hime**
How'd you manage that?!
**[19:42] Hina**
It kinda felt like it'd work out!
**[19:44] Hina**
Look, there's another one!
**[19:46] Hime**
Okay...
**[19:47] Hime**
Nin! Nin!
**[19:48] Hina**
You suck!
**[19:50] Hime**
The Keblins are coming!
**[19:51] Hina**
Let go! Quit trying to take Hime's pants off!
**[19:57] Kerin**
What are you all doing?!
**[19:58] Both**
Th-That voice...
**[20:02] Kerin**
Time to blow it all up!
***SIGN*** See you next week!
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Ekaki Makuru
**[20:08] Cat**
It's me, your wife, Master, Ekaki Makuru.
**[20:13] Cat**
I want to use my Kamieshi
Power to care for you, Master.
**[20:20] Cat**
Just kidding!
**[20:23] Cat**
Bye-bye.
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:35] Uma**
Please, listen, Sister.
**[20:36] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[20:38] Uma**
There's this girl who I
want to tell how I feel—
**[20:39] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[20:41] Sister**
What is it?
**[20:45] Sora**
I did my laundry when there
was some tissue in my pocket,
**[20:47] Sora**
and my clothes ended up covered in it!
**[20:49] Sora**
What should I do, Sister?!
**[20:51] Sister**
At times like that, using the
dryer or some dry fabric softener
**[20:57] ---**
should make it easier to get the tissue off.
**[20:58] Sora**
Really?
**[21:00] Sister**
There's also the option
of using a lint roller,
**[21:03] Sister**
and on the odd side of things,
**[21:04] ---**
you can use the nets that produce
are sold in to pick it off.
**[21:07] Sister**
You can try any of those ways out.
**[21:09] Sora**
Okay! Thank you!
**[21:11] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[21:13] Uma**
Sister!
**[21:19] Gori**
It's an honor. This is
"Virtual-san is looking."
**[21:23] Mito**
Now, we've got a letter to look at.
**[21:25] Mito**
This is from pen name "Sleight of Hand,
Slight of Mouth." Thanks for writing.
**[21:28] Everyone**
Thank you!
**[21:31] Mito**
"Good evening, everyone. You're all incredibly
beautiful, and very popular online."
**[21:35] Mito**
"But who among you is the most
popular? Please tell me."
**[21:39] Hime**
Glad to hear I'm popular!
**[21:39] Mito**
Well everyone, who do you think it is?
**[21:43] Hime**
Popular... Who's most popular?
**[21:44] Shiro**
Well, whoever has the biggest fluffy
melon breads is usually the most popular!
**[21:46] Mito**
Oh, then who does that make number one?
**[21:48] Shiro**
Well, we'd have to compare to see.
**[21:51] Akari**
Okay everyone, step forward.
**[21:53] Shiro**
Everybody line up.
**[21:54] Hime**
Oh, no, don't look!
**[21:56] Akari**
Here we go, show them off!
**[21:58] Hime**
I'm young! I'm too young,
don't make me do this!
**[22:00] Hinata**
Have fun, you guys.
**[22:02] Mito**
So, that settles it.
**[22:05] Mito**
The most popular member among the
six of us is Cyber Girl Siro.
**[22:10] Shiro**
Wait, you were just guessing!
**[22:12] Mito**
I assure you that's not the case!
**[22:13] Mito**
And now the segment's over!
**[22:15] Hina**
Wait, guessing what?
**[22:17] Mito**
Anyway, that's it for this week!
See you next time on...
**[22:20] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:10] Hiyoko**
Good morning!
**[23:11] Hiyoko**
I'm the Virtual Youtuber who's getting
a second crack at life as a young girl,
***SIGN*** Mochi Hiyoko
**[23:14] ---**
Mochi Hiyoko.
**[23:15] Hiyoko**
I'm sure you've all thought about
wanting to be a little girl before.
**[23:19] Hiyoko**
Well, there's a medicine that can make
that dream come true... right here!
**[23:21] Hiyoko**
It's a magical medicine that can turn
you into a little girl right away!
**[23:25] Hiyoko**
I bet everyone would be happy
if we were all little girls!
**[23:28] Hiyoko**
Everybody, be a little girl!
***SIGN*** Next Time:
"The Legendary Secret Medicine... Oh, I Feel Hot!"
***SIGN*** Next week, virtual-san will still be looking!
# E3 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYME20J86/untitled)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] Hime**
Yeah!
**[00:00] Mito**
Wow, impressive!
**[00:00] Mito**
Right!
**[00:03] Peanut**
When a cat is swinging
their tail up and down,
**[00:05] Peanut**
it's means they want some affection.
**[00:06] Uma**
Okay, okay, okay, can I get
some affection, too, then?
**[00:08] Peanut**
Get over here, you goofy horse!
**[00:10] Uma**
Okie dokie!
**[00:13] Shiro**
What's wrong, Mito-Mito?
You seem really exhausted.
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[00:17] Mito**
I haven't been getting enough sleep lately.
**[00:19] Hinata**
I get you. It's easy to lose track of
time when you're playing video games.
**[00:22] Mito**
Not that, Hinata-san! I was
actually practicing something.
**[00:25] Hina**
Practicing something? Well, what
is it? Now I'm really curious!
**[00:27] Mito**
Well, you see...
**[00:29] Mito**
It's a pose to do during
the show's title call.
**[00:31] Hime**
Wait, what? What are you talking about?
**[00:32] Akari**
What kind of pose is it?
**[00:34] Mito**
It's a bit something like...
**[00:35] Mito**
This!
**[00:37] Akari**
What the heck?
**[00:39] Hime**
It's absolutely perfect! Let's use it!
**[00:41] Mito**
Understood!
**[00:43] Mito**
All right, let's do it together!
**[00:44] Mito**
Ready and...
**[00:45] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:33] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[02:47] Ryo**
Haru-kun, you're not allowed to
cook up any more weird drugs.
**[02:49] Haruto**
R-Right. Forgive me.
**[02:51] Miria**
Did something happen?
**[02:53] Haruto**
Oh, no...
**[02:53] Kaede**
Everyone, gather around!
**[02:55] Kaede**
We need to start getting serious
about our galactic conquest!
**[02:58] Kaede**
Anyone have any good suggestions?
**[02:59] Ryo**
About that, Chief...
**[03:01] Ryo**
While I was repairing our ship, I was able
to accidentally invent an incredible switch!
**[03:05] Kaede**
What's it do?
**[03:06] Ryo**
It's a switch that can freeze
it's targets in time!
**[03:09] Haruto**
What?!
**[03:10] Haruto**
Of all the myriad powers that exist,
time manipulation may be the strongest!
**[03:16] Haruto**
Well done, Ryo!
**[03:18] Miria**
Harutrash shut up for once! Awesome!
**[03:20] Kaede**
If we use this on our enemies, we can freeze
them in place and invade their territory!
**[03:24] Miria**
Let me try it!
**[03:26] Miria**
I wanna mess with Harutrash!
**[03:27] Ryo**
Pipe down, Miria-chan.
**[03:29] Miria**
Ryo-kun?
**[03:31] Kaede**
Is... something wrong, Ryo-kun?
**[03:33] Ryo**
I've been thinking this for a while now...
**[03:35] Ryo**
Everyone else in the Game Club is too random!
**[03:37] Ryo**
I'm the only one thinking seriously
about galactic conquest!
**[03:41] Kaede**
Calm down, Ryo-kun!
**[03:42] Ryo**
You understand what I mean, don't you, Chief?
**[03:44] Kaede**
I do! So just... calm down.
**[03:46] ---**
And get time moving again for
Miria-chan and Haruto-kun.
**[03:49] Kaede**
Okay, Ryo-kun?
**[03:50] Ryo**
Why would you say that?
**[03:52] Ryo**
Are you uncomfortable, being alone with me?
**[03:54] Kaede**
Ryo-kun, don't!
**[03:56] Ryo**
It's time that I teach you, Chief,
**[03:57] ---**
that this switch's power is enough to grant
someone control over the entire world!
**[04:02] Kaede**
No—!
**[04:04] Ryo**
And now I'm the only one left in the world!
I've taken control of time!
**[04:10] Ryo**
What? Can you see me?
**[04:12] Ryo**
I asked if you could see me!
**[04:16] Ryo**
Of all things, Haru-kun has invaded
my world of stopped time...
**[04:23] Haruto**
Good grief.
**[04:25] Haruto**
Now I've got the switch!
**[04:27] Ryo**
Wryyy—
**[04:30] Haruto**
Now I just need to release them.
**[04:32] Haruto**
Pink fool, Chief... I'm about to save you!
**[04:36] Haruto**
Click!
**[04:41] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[04:49] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[04:53] Grandma**
Senpen Banka.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase
Senpen Banka
**[04:57] Banner**
It means "constantly changing."
**[04:59] Banner**
It refers to how things can progress
rapidly with the passage of time.
**[05:03] Banner**
Convenience stores are a good example of
something that has evolved wildly over time.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:09] Grandma**
The first one in Japan was built in 1974,
in the Toyosu ward of Tokyo.
**[05:17] Grandma**
The first thing I bought at one was
cup ramen, and it was quite the surprise.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:26] Grandma**
I was genuinely amazed by how good
it tasted the first time I had some!
**[05:31] Grandma**
In the old days, it was fashionable
to eat it while standing around!
**[05:35] Grandma**
Everyone would be in Ginza,
standing around, eating cup ramen.
**[05:40] Grandma**
You were Inzagay, eating amenray.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:44] Grandma**
Not ushisay.
**[05:47] Grandma**
But rather upcay amenray.
**[05:50] Grandma**
I was abbergastedflay,
it was such a urprisesay!
***SIGN*** That being the case, otay ebay ontinuedcay!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[06:05] Chaco**
My name is Chaco!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Chaco
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[06:07] Chaco**
My favorite food is chocolate.
**[06:08] Chaco**
Which is why my name is Chaco!
**[06:11] Chaco**
I'm going to work hard, so I can
become famous like the other Vtubers!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[06:20] Mito**
I guess Virtual-san is looking.
**[06:27] Grandma**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[06:33] Gori**
Aoi-san!
**[06:35] Aoi**
Hey, it's Gori-chan!
**[06:36] Gori**
Sorry to startle you.
**[06:38] Aoi**
That is... a lot of gorillas.
**[06:39] Aoi**
Whatcha doing?
**[06:40] Gori**
Picking up girls.
**[06:42] Aoi**
Picking up girls? How?
**[06:44] Gori**
Aoi-san, would you like to go pick
up banana shakes in Harajuku?
**[06:47] Aoi**
Nope.
**[06:48] Gori**
Aoi-san, would you like to get your
banana fortune read in Harajuku?
**[06:50] Aoi**
Nope.
**[06:51] Gori**
Aoi-san...
**[06:57] Aoi**
Let's go! I'll take take the lead.
**[06:59] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:01] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:04] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[07:09] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[07:14] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[07:16] Hime**
Mirai-san! We've got really big trouble!
***SIGN*** They're moving so erratically, the camera is having trouble keeping up
**[07:18] Akari**
What, what is it?
**[07:20] Akari**
Scuttle, scuttle!
**[07:21] Hime**
Someone using the pen name
"Kinokohead-kun" is in trouble!
**[07:24] Hime**
That's enough waddling around, here, read it!
**[07:27] Akari**
Okay, sorry.
**[07:28] Akari**
Let's see... "Akari-chan,
hello." Hello there!
**[07:30] Hime**
Hello.
**[07:32] Akari**
"There's a music group that I support
that have a concert coming up."
**[07:34] Akari**
"And I was able to secure tickets,
**[07:36] ---**
but it turns out it's the same day
as our baseball club's next game."
**[07:39] Akari**
"There's no telling what my Senpai might do
to me if I don't show up for the game."
**[07:42] Akari**
"Is there any way I can resolve this
peacefully and still go to the concert?"
***SIGN*** Problem: The baseball club's game and a concert at the same time
**[07:47] Hime**
Oh, I can see how he'd want to go!
**[07:50] Hime**
You'd totally want to go the show!
**[07:51] Akari**
I know! But he really cares about
the baseball club, too, right?
**[07:55] Hime**
Yeah, he's a good kid!
**[07:56] Akari**
He is!
**[07:57] Hime**
Have you ever had two different
things fall on the same date?
**[07:59] Hime**
Yeah!
**[07:59] Hime**
I have, I totally have!
**[08:00] Akari**
Go ahead!
**[08:02] Hime**
Well, sometimes Youtubers or Vtubers would
stream at the same time as I was doing one!
**[08:08] Akari**
Oh, I see, while you were streaming yourself!
**[08:11] Hime**
Right, right, right!
**[08:11] Akari**
That totally happens!
**[08:12] Hime**
And I wanna watch, so, so bad!
**[08:13] Akari**
I get you, I mean, you can always
watch it once it's archived...
**[08:18] Akari**
But then you can't make comments!
**[08:19] Hime**
Exactly!
**[08:20] Akari**
True enough...
**[08:21] Hime**
I wanna see it with my own eyes, in real-time!
**[08:23] Akari**
So what did you end up doing?
**[08:25] Hime**
Watch the archive!
**[08:28] Akari**
Aw, look at you! Such a good girl!
**[08:30] Hime**
Yes! I'm a good girl!
**[08:32] Akari**
But y'know, I'm sure Kinokohead-kun
is hoping for a way to peacefully
**[08:35] ---**
skip the game and head to the concert...
**[08:40] Hime**
Good point!
**[08:42] Hime**
Mirai-san? Hey, Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[08:46] Yami**
Senpai, take my big bat...
**[08:47] Hikari**
I'm not letting you finish that!
**[08:48] Yami**
I applaud your speedy response.
**[08:50] Hikari**
You can do this, Akari!
**[08:52] Hime**
Hello? Earth to Mirai-san!
**[08:56] Akari**
Sorry, sorry,
**[08:57] Akari**
Well, pen name Kinokohead-kun,
I'm gonna get to the bottom line.
**[09:02] Hime**
Is this it?! She's going
to show her bottom! Line?
**[09:06] Akari**
First, you wait for the manager of
this artist you like, at their office!
**[09:10] Hime**
The manager?
**[09:11] Akari**
Right! And then you hook up with the manager!
**[09:13] Hime**
What if it's another guy?
**[09:15] Akari**
You hook up with him.
**[09:16] Hime**
Wow, how versatile!
**[09:17] Akari**
And then, you seduce the manager!
**[09:19] Hime**
Every bit as lewd as I figured!
**[09:21] Akari**
Then, after seducing the manager,
you seduce your baseball club's coach!
**[09:24] Hime**
A world of adult relations!
**[09:26] Akari**
Then, on the day of the big game,
**[09:28] Akari**
you invite the artist, and have
the concert right before the game!
**[09:32] Hime**
Hey, that really does cover all the bases!
**[09:34] Hime**
I've got the perfect thing, then!
Instead of glow sticks,
**[09:37] Hime**
everybody swings bats around!
**[09:38] Hikari**
You nailed it!
**[09:39] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go buy eight bats
to stick between my fingers, then!
**[09:43] Akari**
Wow, you can handle that kind of weight
on your fingers?! Talk about buff!
**[09:46] Akari**
You must be shredded, Tanaka!
**[09:47] Hime**
Here I go!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[09:55] Hinata**
Huh, was this big empty lot always here?
**[09:59] Hinata**
I can feel the Gianism!
**[10:05] Hinata**
Wait, this is bad...
**[10:06] Hinata**
In a space like this, with no cover,
and no hiding spots,
**[10:09] Hinata**
if I came in with a blaster,
it's low splat coverage
**[10:11] ---**
and lack of mobility will make
it hard to secure any territory.
**[10:16] Hinata**
Should I spam "Come on!"
to call for reinforcements?
**[10:19] Hinata**
Wait, hang on there! Those pipes are here.
**[10:22] Hinata**
If I can lure an enemy behind them,
when they've let
**[10:24] ---**
their guard down behind the cover, I can
nail them with the blaster's splash damage!
**[10:29] Hinata**
Boom!
**[10:30] Hinata**
This might work!
**[10:31] Hinata**
All right! Booyah!
**[10:36] Hinata**
Maybe I ought to practice with the
blaster every once in a while.
**[10:39] Hinata**
Bang!
**[10:40] Hinata**
Bang!
**[10:42] Hinata**
It's always awesome to see those explosions!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[10:48] Sora**
You all are so helpless.
**[10:52] Sora**
Oh, well.
**[10:54] Sora**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[11:01] Shiro**
Oh, it's Hime-chan, Hina-chan! Welcome!
**[11:04] Mime**
We are so fed up!
**[11:07] Hina**
Can we get some trivia about rabbits, please?
**[11:10] Hime**
Yeah, give it to us!
**[11:11] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[11:16] Shiro**
Oh, rabbits!
**[11:19] Shiro**
They're often considered an icon
of people who hate being alone,
**[11:21] Shiro**
and there's no shortage of girls
who've said something like,
**[11:24] ---**
"I'm like a bunny.
I'll die if I'm left alone."
**[11:27] Shiro**
And when you see individuals on their own,
compared to the ones that live in groups,
**[11:30] ---**
they seem a bit lonely.
**[11:32] Shiro**
But apparently, living in colonies makes them
anxious, and they love being on their own!
**[11:38] Shiro**
If anything, we need to be careful
about cramming more than one into the
**[11:42] ---**
same cage just because we
imagine them to be lonely.
**[11:46] Shiro**
Incidentally, the Guinness World Record
for the largest rabbit in the world
**[11:50] Shiro**
was 1 meter and 32 cm long!
**[11:54] Hime**
Wow, really?
**[11:56] Hina**
Your trivia really is
always handy, Siro-chan!
**[11:59] Hime**
Sure is!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Villager 2
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[12:08] Villager**
The whole world finding out
about your preferences!
**[12:13] Villager**
That's what this corner boils down to.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[12:22] Mito**
I wonder who's visiting today?
**[12:29] Alice**
Hello! Class Prez!
**[12:31] Mito**
Oh, I see Mononobe Alice
is my guest this week.
**[12:33] Alice**
I get to have afterschool
tea time with the Class Prez!
**[12:36] Mito**
You're coming dangerously close to
trademark infringement, Alice-chan!
**[12:38] Mito**
Let's walk that back!
**[12:39] Alice**
Okay!
**[12:40] Mito**
A tea party, eh?
Well, you're not exactly wrong.
**[12:45] Mito**
Today let's make it an ultimate
decision committee/tea party!
**[12:47] Today's Topic**
Here is today's topic.
**[12:49] ---**
Which would you prefer to
be served at a tea party?
**[12:52] A**
Noni juice.
**[12:53] B**
Senburicha.
**[12:54] Alice**
Senburicha... that's a Japanese tea, yes?
**[12:57] Mito**
Seems like it, right?
**[12:58] Alice**
And noni juice is juice, not tea!
**[13:00] Mito**
You are correct.
**[13:01] Alice**
I had something called aojiru for a
segment once, and it was surprisingly good!
**[13:06] Mito**
That was supposed to be a penalty for you,
**[13:08] Mito**
and when you said it was surprisingly good,
you sabotaged the point of you drinking it!
**[13:12] Mito**
You're supposed to give a big
reaction about how bad it tastes!
**[13:15] Alice**
I guess so! Sorry!
**[13:16] Mito**
But that honesty is part of what
people love about you, Alice-chan.
**[13:19] Alice**
Thank you!
**[13:20] Mito**
I honestly haven't had noni
juice before, myself...
**[13:22] Alice**
Oh, I have!
**[13:25] Mito**
You have?
**[13:26] Alice**
It had kind of a stingy taste.
**[13:29] Mito**
That doesn't sound good after all.
**[13:31] Mito**
But they do say that the worse things taste,
the better they are for you.
**[13:34] Mito**
Granted, that's a bit of folk wisdom.
**[13:36] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[13:37] Mito**
Alice-chan, since we have both here today,
why don't we drink them to decide?
**[13:42] Mito**
I'll go with the noni juice.
**[13:43] Alice**
Then I'll go with B, the Japanese senburicha!
**[13:47] Mito**
All right, here we go!
**[13:48] Mito**
Ready and...
**[13:50] Mito**
What the...
**[13:52] Alice**
This is better than I thought!
**[13:53] Mito**
Hey... reactions are supposed to be...
**[13:55] Mito**
As a streamer...
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[14:01] Shiro**
Virtual-san is watching!
**[14:04] Shiro**
Smash, smash, smash!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[14:07] Unity**
Unity-chan...
**[14:10] Gori**
* It's an honor. This is*
* Virtual-san is looking.*
**[14:13] Mito**
*Now, we've got a letter to look at.*
**[14:15] Unity**
Wait. If this show is on...
**[14:19] Unity**
Today's...
**[14:20] ---**
Wednesday?!
**[14:24] Unity**
Oh, crap, I forgot my report!
**[14:28] Unity**
Why does this happen?!
**[14:30] Unity**
How does it keep happening?! Man...
**[14:34] Unity**
Ow.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[14:38] Lily**
A good lily afternoon to everyone!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Amatsuka Liliel
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[14:41] Lily**
I'm the angel, Amatsuka Liliel!
**[14:44] Lily**
I'm training in the human world
to become an archangel some day!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer
**[14:55] Elu**
Hold it right there.
**[14:56] Everybody**
Who are you?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[15:00] Kerin**
Elu-san, is that you?
**[15:03] Hina**
Elu-san? You mean the legendary, beautiful
god elf known throughout the land,
**[15:07] Hina**
Elu-san the Elf?!
**[15:09] Hime**
Yeah but I'm pretty sure
she didn't look like that!
**[15:12] Hime**
She looks kinda pale!
**[15:13] Hime**
And with really dry skin!
**[15:15] Kerin**
There's a story behind it all.
**[15:16] Hina**
There is?
**[15:18] Kerin**
Fine, then. Since you guys are here,
you might as well take a seat.
**[15:20] Hime**
Okay, then...
**[15:21] Hime**
Down we go...
**[15:21] Kerin**
You too, Keblin.
**[15:24] Kerin**
See, Elu-san is an elf girl who
came here from another the world.
**[15:28] Hime**
Yeah, I know!
**[15:29] Hime**
She's even in the wiki.
**[15:32] Kerin**
But one day, there was this big disaster.
**[15:34] Hina**
Disaster?
**[15:35] Kerin**
It was burned down! Her homeland, the forest.
**[15:39] Kerin**
*The forest... forest...*
**[15:43] Hina**
It was a real tragedy.
**[15:44] Hime**
You know about it, Hina?
**[15:46] Hina**
No, I just wanted to say that.
**[15:50] Hina**
Continue the story.
**[15:52] Kerin**
Elu-san rushed back to the forest,
but it was already too late.
**[15:56] Kerin**
The entire place had been scorched,
with her kin burnt to death.
**[15:58] Hime**
Oh no... that's terrible.
**[16:00] Kerin**
She was so wrought with grape sor...
**[16:02] Kerin**
She was so fought with... grave...
**[16:07] Kerin**
She was so fraught with great sorrow,
Elu-san used all of her life energy
**[16:11] Kerin**
to cast a spell to revive the forest.
**[16:14] Hina**
I know that spell!
**[16:16] Hina**
It's Return-the-Forest-Spirit-Head, right?
**[16:17] Kerin**
No!
**[16:19] Kerin**
The forest was restored, but Elu-san
paid the price, and was turned to stone.
**[16:25] Hime**
What a sad story.
**[16:27] Kerin**
Yeah. And ever since I heard about it,
**[16:30] ---**
I've been studying magic to restore her,
here in the forests of Gunma.
**[16:35] Hina**
Sorry we barged in here without knowing.
**[16:38] Kerin**
The timing actually works out.
I actually just finished the spell.
**[16:42] Hime**
Wow, convenient!
**[16:45] Kerin**
Forests, earth, birds!
**[16:47] Kerin**
Let your life force fuel my magic circle,
and release Elu-san from her petrification!
**[16:53] Kerin**
Elu Dorado!
***SIGN*** Elu-san—!
**[17:00] Gori**
Hello.
**[17:05] Gori**
Hello.
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[17:16] Uma**
I hope this works today.
**[17:18] Uma**
Hear me out, Sister.
**[17:19] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[17:20] Uma**
There's a girl who I
really want to tell how—
**[17:22] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[17:27] Sister**
What is it?
**[17:28] Sora**
I wanted to make breakfast for a friend,
but all I could make was a mushy fried egg!
**[17:33] Sora**
I just know they hate me now!
**[17:35] Sister**
You have nothing to worry about.
**[17:38] Sister**
Cooking is all about love and sincerity.
**[17:40] Sister**
As long as your feelings were conveyed,
the appearance doesn't matter.
**[17:43] Sora**
That's a relief.
**[17:45] Sister**
And even if it's mushy, two pieces of bread
can make it into a lovely egg sandwich.
**[17:51] Sora**
I get it!
**[17:52] Sora**
Okay, tomorrow, I'm gonna pull this off!
**[17:56] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[17:58] Uma**
An egg sandwich sounds delicious!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:05] Aoi**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[18:06] Aoi**
So look, look, look at this!
**[18:10] Hina**
Okay, I've got a letter right here!
**[18:13] Hina**
From pen name "The Pen Is
Virtual Division the Sword-san."
**[18:17] Hina**
Thanks for writing in!
**[18:17] Girls**
Thank you!
**[18:21] Hina**
Let's see, "I've always loved hip hop."
**[18:24] Hina**
"And I was curious if
you all listened to it."
**[18:26] Hina**
"If you don't mind, I'd like to
hear you all do freestyle raps."
**[18:29] Hina**
So it says!
***SIGN*** Letter: Let's hear some
freestyle raps
**[18:30] Hinata**
This is bad!
**[18:32] Mito**
I can't possibly do something like this,
not in sudden death mode.
**[18:35] Hina**
If you're virtual Youtubers,
surely you can rap a bit?
**[18:41] Hina**
Everybody ready?
**[18:42] Hinata**
No!
**[18:45] Mito**
Uh, what? Who are you supposed
to be? What is this?
**[18:48] Mito**
It's an earthquake!
**[18:49] Shiro**
What the heck?
**[18:50] Mito**
A heartbeat?
**[18:50] Hina**
It's beatboxing...
**[18:51] Hime**
Oh, that's it!
**[18:53] Hina**
Hina's going first!
**[18:55] Hime**
Yeah!
**[18:55] Hina**
Gonna drop a beat on them with a virtual rap!
**[18:58] All**
Yeah!
**[18:59] Mito**
Wow, she's actually got it down!
**[19:01] Hina**
Woo! Uh... don't stop the backbeat, please.
**[19:03] Girls**
Oh, okay.
**[19:05] Hina**
What's up with winter,
who you supposed to be?
**[19:07] Hina**
Winter, for you, hot water for stew!
**[19:09] Hina**
Hey! Yo! Check it out!
**[19:11] Hina**
Next up!
**[19:13] Shiro**
I'm the girl up next after Hina!
**[19:15] Shiro**
Gonna break a beat, so let's-a go!
**[19:17] Shiro**
It's winter, I've been here, no fear!
**[19:23] Hinata**
To all the boys and girls on the streets
**[19:25] Hinata**
Styling to the beats!
**[19:26] Hinata**
Independent, born to rend it,
if there's bad we better end it!
**[19:29] Hinata**
The young kids born into a paper society!
**[19:32] Hinata**
But we're not gonna split
or take the demerit!
**[19:36] Hinata**
We've got work steady, ready,
like a turtle in an eddy! Yeah!
**[19:39] Hime**
Turtle in a what?!
**[19:40] Hime**
Turtles?
**[19:41] Hinata**
Next up, next up, next up, next up!
**[19:44] Hime**
The rowdy girl named Tanaka Hime!
**[19:46] Hime**
Someone said turtle and
I don't know what to say!
**[19:49] Hime**
If a turtle crawls under your table,
**[19:51] Hime**
and lifts it up is it port-able?
**[19:53] Hime**
Yo! Next up is Akari-chan!
**[20:00] Akari**
You know what's sexy? Turtles!
**[20:03] Mito**
Damn it!
**[20:04] Mito**
Damn it...!
**[20:09] Akari**
You know what's sexy? Turtles!
**[20:11] Akari**
And you know what turtles are? Sexy!
**[20:14] Mito**
Change the subject!
**[20:15] Mito**
Please, change the subject, Akari-san!
**[20:19] Akari**
This is hard, really hard,
and I'm bad, I admit!
**[20:22] Akari**
But if sexy is the subject, then I love it!
**[20:25] Akari**
Nothing's funner than sexy stuff, yo!
**[20:27] Akari**
Now, Mito-chan, say something sexy!
**[20:30] Mito**
I have to do a sexy rap now?!
**[20:32] Hinata**
Go, go, go...
**[20:34] Mito**
All right, here I go...
**[20:36] Mito**
This is it!
**[20:37] Mito**
I like citrus, so have a
happy Merry Christmas.
**[20:39] Mito**
I, uh...
**[20:40] Mito**
Speaking of snow, there's snowballs...
**[20:41] Mito**
Throw balls... a lot of... throwing...
**[20:46] Mito**
A whole lot!
**[20:46] Mito**
I'm really just throwing whatever out now.
**[20:49] Mito**
This isn't rap anymore.
**[20:50] Hime**
Any ideas?
**[20:51] Mito**
Right, rap, rap...
**[20:52] Mito**
Let's see...
**[20:54] Mito**
I'm good at throwing balls of snow.
**[20:56] Mito**
Show, flow, bow and arrow!
**[21:02] Mito**
Uh, and next... uh...
**[21:04] Mito**
Who hasn't gone yet?
**[21:05] Mito**
Did you go yet, Hina-san?
**[21:07] Girls**
That's it! That's everyone!
**[21:08] Mito**
Oh, is that everyone? We're done!
**[21:10] Akari**
Finish it up with something cool!
**[21:12] Mito**
Last one, last bun, last run...
**[21:15] Mito**
I won. Are we done? Can I stop?
**[21:18] Shiro**
Now that's what I call virtual Youtubers!
**[21:22] Mito**
It certainly is...
**[21:24] Hina**
And that wraps it up for this week!
**[21:27] Hina**
And so, until next week...
**[21:29] Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Rindo Mikoto
**[23:11] Rindo**
I'm the oni queen, Rindo Mikoto.
**[23:13] Rindo**
Now, you delightful children of man,
**[23:15] Rindo**
during the Setsubun holiday,
you like to shout,
**[23:18] ---**
"Oni get out, fortune come in,"
and then throw beans at us, yes?
**[23:21] Rindo**
But even oni can hurt,
and not just physically.
**[23:24] Rindo**
You also shouldn't waste food.
**[23:27] Rindo**
Which is why I always make a point
to catch it all in my mouth.
**[23:30] Rindo**
Next time is "Erupt!
Maximum Magic, Buchitova."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"Erupt! Maximum Magic, Buchitova."
**[23:33] Rindo**
Virtual-san will still be looking next week.
# E4 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRG57X38R/untitled)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
They say that cucumbers are supposed to
have the fewest calories of all fruits.
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey! Then what about carrots?
**[00:08] Peanut**
I'm talking about cucumbers
right now, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:18] Shiro**
Four sixty-six! Four sixty-seven!
Really working up a sweat!
**[00:22] Hinata**
Let's all pull off a sweet
muscle pose today! Here we go!
**[00:28] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:16] Kaede**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:30] Ryo**
I'm sorry about the other day.
**[02:32] Miria**
No more inventing weird stuff, Ryo-kun.
**[02:36] Haruto**
Listen, people, have you seen the chief?
**[02:39] Miria**
Kaede-chan?
**[02:40] Miria**
She picked up a weird life reading outside
the ship and wanted to check on it.
**[02:45] Kaede**
Ow, ow, ow, ow...
**[02:47] Ryo**
Chief? What's wrong?
**[02:50] Kaede**
I found some strange life form
**[02:51] Kaede**
where I couldn't tell if it was
alive or dead, and it bit me...
**[02:54] Haruto**
You're hurt, chief?
**[02:56] Haruto**
You should get it treated!
**[02:58] Kaede**
But it's not that big a wound,
I'm sure it's...
**[03:03] Miria**
Kaede-chan?
**[03:05] Ryo**
Chief?
**[03:06] Haruto**
What the?!
**[03:07] Haruto**
Hey!
**[03:08] Haruto**
Ch-chief!
**[03:12] Miria**
Kaede-chan! No!
**[03:14] Miria**
The neck is...
**[03:17] Haruto**
The chief is eating the pink fool!
**[03:21] Miria**
Harutrash...
**[03:25] Haruto**
Ryo! We need to retreat!
**[03:26] ---**
The chief and the pink fool
are acting strange!
**[03:29] Kaede**
Ryo-kun...
**[03:31] Ryo**
Haru-kun, help me!
**[03:33] Ryo**
Chief, stay away!
**[03:35] Ryo**
No! I said stop...
**[03:38] Haruto**
Damn it!
**[03:40] Haruto**
It's a pandemic.
**[03:42] Haruto**
One that might wipe out the game club!
**[03:45] Miria**
Harutrash!
***SIGN*** Chomp
***SIGN*** Game Club
***SIGN*** Zombie Club
***SIGN*** Zombie Club
**[03:57] Kaede**
Now we're all zombies, huh?
**[04:00] Miria**
Surprising how much consciousness
we still have.
**[04:03] Ryo**
Seriously.
**[04:06] Haruto**
If anything, doesn't becoming
undead make us unstoppable?
**[04:10] Ryo**
True.
**[04:12] Kaede**
You all look great.
**[04:17] Kaede**
Keep that camera rolling!
**[04:20] Ryo**
The chief is trying to
cash in on that movie.
**[04:23] Miria**
I wanna do the Thriller dance with all of you!
**[04:27] Haruto**
Good idea, pink fool.
**[04:33] Kaede**
Okay, let's invade enemy
territory while dancing!
**[04:38] All**
Hoo!
**[04:42] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[04:54] Grandma**
Sunpo Nankou.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Sunpo Nankou
**[04:58] Grandma**
That's the phrase.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:00] Grandma**
It refers to times when you have trouble
crossing even the smallest distance.
**[05:05] Grandma**
"Having trouble crossing" might be a
bit melodramatic, but in the old days,
**[05:10] ---**
transportation wasn't as easy as it is now.
**[05:12] Grandma**
Depending on the time, there would
be detours because of road work,
**[05:16] Grandma**
and all kinds of construction, and holes
in the road as a result, everywhere.
**[05:22] Grandma**
But when it comes to walking,
the thing that shocked me the most
**[05:26] ---**
when I moved to Tokyo in 1964,
were women in high heels.
**[05:31] Grandma**
The roads were in better shape than
they were in the country, to be sure,
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:35] Grandma**
but in my home, Niigata, heavy duty
construction hadn't started yet,
**[05:40] ---**
making it hard to get anywhere.
**[05:42] Grandma**
So when I moved to Tokyo with that mindset,
and saw women in high heels,
**[05:48] ---**
I could only think,
"How can they walk like that?"
**[05:51] Grandma**
That said, your Virtual Grandmother can
freely travel, no matter how old she gets.
**[05:59] Grandma**
Just like this!
**[06:06] Grandma**
I can get great air, too, in fact.
**[06:08] Grandma**
Three, two, one, blast off!
**[06:13] Grandma**
Fly, Sachiko!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:26] Hime**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[06:35] Hinata**
Man, I thought we were done for!
**[06:38] Hinata**
It sure is great to be alive!
**[06:40] Hina**
Hey, hey, did any of you see that special
feature on animals that was on TV yesterday?
**[06:45] Akari**
I totally did! The chimpanzee
segment was so cute!
**[06:49] Shiro**
I liked the one on kitties!
**[06:53] Hina**
I think I liked the penguins best!
**[06:55] Hina**
I know, why don't we all
go to the zoo some day?
**[06:58] Everyone**
Sounds good!
**[07:05] Hinata**
That scared me! What was that shaking?
**[07:10] Hime**
Hang on...
**[07:12] Hime**
Isn't it really quiet?
**[07:14] Hime**
I don't hear a single thing from outside!
**[07:17] Shiro**
You're right! No wind
from the outside, either!
**[07:21] Mito**
Could it be...?
**[07:23] Mito**
Everyone, are we at—?!
**[07:27] Everyone**
The bottom of the sea!
**[07:29] Shiro**
Why would we be at the bottom of the sea?!
**[07:32] Hime**
But if you think about it, we've got air,
and the classroom's power is still on.
**[07:36] Hime**
I don't think we need to panic.
**[07:38] Hime**
Things will probably go
back to normal in a while.
**[07:41] Mito**
Good point! Let's just wait for the
classroom to return to normal, then.
**[07:46] Shiro**
Still, I didn't know it
was like this down here.
**[07:49] Shiro**
You can't dive this far down,
so it's kind of interesting.
**[07:54] Akari**
Hey, a penguin!
**[07:56] Hina**
A penguin?! Where, where, where?!
**[07:59] Hina**
Hey, you're right! So cute!
**[08:03] Hinata**
It's cute, but...
**[08:05] Hinata**
Deep sea penguins sure are huge, huh?
**[08:09] Mito**
Uh... I think... it's way too big!
**[08:14] Hime**
It's opening its beak!
**[08:16] Peanut**
Here I come!
**[08:19] Akari**
You again?!
**[08:22] Hime**
Hina, you love penguins!
Do something about this! Quick!
**[08:27] Hina**
I don't like my penguins this big!
**[08:31] Hina**
It's gonna eat us!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[08:43] Hina**
Thank you for calling.
This is "Virtual-san is looking."
**[08:50] Aoi**
That'll do it.
**[08:52] Aoi**
When Gori-chan goes for that banana,
I'll pull the string, and I'll catch him.
**[08:56] Aoi**
This'll be great!
**[08:59] Gori**
Yo, yo, my name is Gorilla!
**[09:02] Gori**
When it comes to the jungle,
there's no one iller!
**[09:03] Gori**
Solid gold content with no filler!
**[09:05] Gori**
Gonna open to door to another thriller!
**[09:12] Gori**
Hello.
**[09:13] Aoi**
So he can shrink and grow at will.
**[09:14] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[09:16] Gori**
Hello.
**[09:19] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[09:25] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[09:30] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[09:32] Hime**
Someone with the pen-name
"Yumirin-chan" is in trouble!
**[09:35] Hime**
Here, read this!
**[09:37] Akari**
Let's take a look.
**[09:39] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello.
**[09:40] Hime**
H'lo.
**[09:42] Akari**
"I'm thinking about quitting my job."
**[09:45] Akari**
Wow, really?
**[09:46] Akari**
"My bosses treat me bad, I have to work a ton
of overtime, and every day is really hard."
**[09:49] Hime**
Oh, wow...
**[09:50] Akari**
"But I feel like quitting would be
like giving up. What should I do?"
**[09:53] Hime**
Man, this is serious!
***SIGN*** Problem: Whether or not to quit your job
***SIGN***
**[09:58] Akari**
What should she do?
**[09:59] Hime**
Yeah, good question...
**[10:01] Hime**
Mirai-san?
**[10:02] Hime**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[10:05] Hikari**
I think she should quit.
**[10:07] Hikari**
If she stresses herself until she's sick,
it'd defeat the point of having a job, right?
**[10:10] Yami**
But just quitting is dull.
**[10:12] Yami**
Let's get some revenge.
**[10:14] Hikari**
Revenge?!
**[10:14] Yami**
Sneak a secret photo into a desk.
**[10:17] Hikari**
I've heard about this before.
**[10:18] Yami**
Or have Chono-san slap somebody.
**[10:20] Hikari**
Oh, I know this show!
**[10:22] Yami**
The rest... I leave to you, Akari.
**[10:25] Yami**
Seeya.
**[10:26] Hikari**
Take it from here, Akari!
**[10:28] Hime**
Hello?
**[10:29] Hime**
Hello!
**[10:30] Hime**
Mirai-san?!
**[10:32] Akari**
Sorry, I was in a world of my own!
**[10:35] Hime**
Good morning.
**[10:36] Akari**
Okay, pen-name Yumirin-chan,
I'll get to the bottom line!
**[10:41] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
**[10:45] Akari**
You should get a new job at a company
that supports a matchmaking app!
**[10:49] Hime**
A new job?
**[10:51] Akari**
Then you should find a girl
that your old boss would like!
**[10:54] Hime**
What for?!
**[10:56] Akari**
Then you hire a detective!
**[10:59] Hime**
But why? Why?!
**[11:00] Akari**
You have the detective shadow them,
after matching the boss and the girl.
**[11:05] Akari**
Then you have the detective
take pictures of them together,
**[11:09] ---**
and send some scandalous pictures
to your old boss's family!
**[11:13] Hime**
That's scary!
**[11:15] Akari**
That way you can get a new
job and get revenge, too!
**[11:19] Hime**
Akari-chan, you're a genius!
**[11:21] Akari**
I sure am!
**[11:22] Hime**
Wow!
**[11:23] Hime**
But y'know, if you make that
match, and they get together,
**[11:26] Hime**
wouldn't he be really glad about
finding a cute young girl?
**[11:30] Akari**
True.
**[11:31] Akari**
If that happens, then you call up Chono-san.
**[11:35] Hime**
Got it!
**[11:36] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go grab him, then!
**[11:39] Akari**
Uh, wait a sec, Tanaka...
**[11:40] Akari**
That's not the first step!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:47] Hinata**
This lot is pretty big.
**[11:52] Hinata**
Up we go.
**[11:57] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[11:59] Hinata**
This place is surrounded by buildings.
**[12:02] Hinata**
If I was surrounded by people in the building
behind me, along with the ones in front,
**[12:05] Hinata**
on top of enemies blocking
the street, what would I do?
**[12:10] Hinata**
I mustn't run away.
**[12:11] Hinata**
I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away,
I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away!
**[12:15] Hinata**
No matter how tough the situation,
I will find a way to survive!
**[12:18] Hinata**
Now I wanna play some video games, though.
**[12:23] Hinata**
Okay, I'll skip school and head home.
**[12:28] Akari**
Hinata...
**[12:29] Hinata**
Whoa, Akari-cha! What are you doing there?!
**[12:30] Akari**
You shouldn't play hooky.
**[12:33] Akari**
This pipe is my territory!
**[12:35] Hinata**
What?! You think I can't splat over it?!
**[12:39] Akari**
Come on, off to school.
**[12:41] Hinata**
Hang on!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[12:50] Hinata**
Yay! Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:58] Shiro**
Oh, it's Aoi-chan! Welcome!
**[13:02] Aoi**
I am so fed up!
**[13:04] Aoi**
Can I get some trivia about candy, please?
**[13:06] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[13:12] Shiro**
Ah, candy...
***SIGN*** "Candy"
**[13:16] Shiro**
Y'know, there's a candy that was invented
in Germany for the dental health of kids!
**[13:22] Shiro**
In 1920, Germany had fewer foods
that required heavy duty chewing,
**[13:28] Shiro**
which was causing a lot of children
to develop dental problems.
**[13:30] Shiro**
And so, something was created in order
to force children to chew harder
**[13:34] ---**
in order to prevent dental problems: gummies!
**[13:38] ---**
The name comes from the
German word for rubber.
**[13:41] ---**
By the way, if you give
someone gummies on white day,
**[13:44] ---**
it carries the message of, "I don't
like you," so keep that in mind!
**[13:52] Aoi**
Wow, really? Your trivia really
is always handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Special Announcement
***SIGN*** The Sudden Appearance of a City
***SIGN*** Overflowing with crowds
***SIGN*** Giant Growth
***SIGN*** Transformation
***SIGN*** The secrets of the opening are about to be revealed!?
***SIGN*** Coming Soon!!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[14:21] Mito**
I've got a bad feeling about this.
**[14:23] Mito**
Like I shouldn't open this door.
**[14:29] Mito**
Shut up! Mugi-chan, calm down!
**[14:31] Mito**
Keep that decibel level down!
**[14:32] Mugi**
Well, I was scared on my own,
**[14:34] Mugi**
and when the door suddenly opened,
I was scared!
**[14:36] Mito**
I guess I scared you, and I'm sorry.
**[14:38] Mito**
But this is the ultimate decision committee,
**[14:40] Mito**
so are you ready to to go?
**[14:42] Mugi**
Yes!
**[14:42] Mito**
Here is today's subject.
**[14:44] Mito**
If you could only eat one thing,
would it be a) meat or b) grass?
**[14:48] Mugi**
Grass was something you ate before, right?
**[14:51] Mito**
When I was in elementary school, I had
a a bit too much curiosity, so yes,
**[14:54] Mito**
but I have it under control now, thank you.
**[14:56] Mito**
So, which is it, Mugi-chan?
**[14:57] Mugi**
I think I'd pick meat.
**[15:01] Mugi**
I want to live a long time,
and did you know this?
**[15:04] Mito**
Yes?
**[15:05] Mugi**
Setouchi Jakucho-san eats 800 grams of meat
a day, and she's ninety-five years old!
**[15:11] Mito**
True enough, she's living proof.
**[15:13] Mugi**
Yep, that's right!
**[15:14] Mito**
But Mugi-chan, you've never
eaten grass before, right?
**[15:17] Mugi**
Well, that's true.
**[15:19] Mito**
It's important to try new things!
**[15:21] Mito**
You shut-ins are just a little
too set in your ways, I suppose.
**[15:25] Mugi**
I am not!
**[15:26] Mito**
That's the bell for 3 PM!
**[15:27] Mito**
Well, I honestly wasn't sure at first
this time, but ultimately it has to be B!
**[15:31] Mugi**
But grass doesn't taste good!
**[15:34] Mito**
You want to eat some meat?
**[15:35] Mugi**
I wanna eat meat!
**[15:36] Mito**
You do realize everyone's
onto those crocodile tears?
**[15:39] Mugi**
But everyone is so nice to me when I do it!
**[15:41] Mito**
Why, you little...
**[15:42] Mito**
Well, I recommend you all try
eating the grass around your home!
**[15:45] Mito**
It'll open a whole new world for you!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[15:51] Rin**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:54] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[15:57] Unity**
Hi, everybody, it's Ootori Kohaku!
**[15:59] Unity**
Today I've got something good to show you!
**[16:02] Unity**
This is a big warehouse that my
papa gave me that's on the wharf,
**[16:05] Unity**
and it's where I hang out!
**[16:07] Unity**
It's got a bunch of stuff I've collected!
**[16:10] Unity**
Like this thing, and that thing...
**[16:13] Unity**
And this here, and I like this one!
**[16:14] Unity**
Then there's this! Oof!
**[16:19] Unity**
Impressive, right?
**[16:22] Unity**
And yet, somehow...
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Ruruno Ruru
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Saotome Miko
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Suzuki Miyano
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Nadasaki Tooru
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Sanpi
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Kishi Tsurone
***SIGN*** Pen Name: High Neck Wolf
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Shinonome Kizuna
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Vortex
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Maron
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[16:46] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[16:51] Gori**
Hello.
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:56] Kerin**
Why?!
**[16:58] Hime**
It's a gorilla! So cute!
**[17:00] Gori**
Hello.
**[17:00] Hina**
So Elu-san's a gorilla now?
**[17:03] Kerin**
Don't be ridiculous.
**[17:04] Kerin**
She... My Elu-san...
**[17:06] Kerin**
She'd never be so hairy!
**[17:08] Gori**
Good elfning!
**[17:09] Gori**
I'm here from the land of elves!
I'm the high-minded elven beauty, Elu!
**[17:14] Gori**
Hello!
***SIGN*** Cut that out!
**[17:16] Kerin**
Keblins, get this gorilla scum out of here!
**[17:21] Gori**
What are you doing?! I haven't
had enough screen time!
**[17:23] Hime**
Wait!
**[17:24] Hime**
Let poor Gori say something!
**[17:26] Kerin**
What is it, gorilla?
**[17:30] Gori**
The thing about bananas is...
**[17:31] Gori**
People think they grow on trees, right?
But they're actually grass.
***SIGN*** This is grass
**[17:35] Gori**
And did you know that they're
not fruits, but vegetables?
**[17:43] Hime & Hina**
Get that liar out of here!
**[17:44] Gori**
Hello!
**[17:46] Kerin**
Damn it! I can't believe that
nuisance got in the way.
**[17:49] Kerin**
I was gonna save Elu-san,
**[17:51] Kerin**
make her fall for me,
**[17:53] Kerin**
destroy the world,
**[17:54] Kerin**
and create a paradise for the two
of us, and now the plan's ruined!
**[17:57] Hime**
So you were up to no good
after all, you goofy goober!
**[18:02] Kerin**
You are the one who's a goofy goober!
**[18:04] Kerin**
Go forth, Keblins!
**[18:05] Hina**
Hao!
**[18:07] Hime**
Hao Hao!
**[18:09] Hime**
There's no end to them!
**[18:11] Hime**
Hina, look out!
**[18:14] Hina**
S-Stop it! My bellybutton...
Don't play with it!
**[18:18] Kerin**
You two are done for! I'll blow you both up!
**[18:21] Hime**
This is bad!
**[18:22] Kerin**
Super Maximum Magic, Buchitoga!
**[18:28] Hina**
Hime, this is bad! That's the high
level version of Buchitova, Buchitoga!
**[18:32] Hime**
Boy, that naming convention sounds familiar!
**[18:35] Hime**
What do we do?!
**[18:37] Hina**
I didn't want to use this, but...
**[18:40] Hina**
Time for the maximum
defensive magic, Gorillaga!
**[18:47] Gori**
Hello!
**[18:48] Gori**
Hello.
**[18:50] Kerin**
Damn it! This stupid gorilla
keeps getting in my way!
**[18:55] Kerin**
This isn't over!
**[19:00] Hina**
He was really tough.
**[19:02] Hime**
Yeah!
**[19:03] Hime**
Hey, Hina-chan, want to
grab some banana shakes?
**[19:06] Hina**
Sounds nice!
**[19:07] Hina**
Y'know, bananas are vegetables!
**[19:10] Hime**
Hello! Bananas! Hello!
**[19:12] Hime**
So cute!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:22] Uma**
I hope you can finally hear
me out this time, Sister.
**[19:24] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:26] Uma**
There's this girl I want to—
**[19:27] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:33] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:35] Sora**
A friend of mine borrowed a book
and hasn't returned it yet!
**[19:37] Sora**
It's hard to ask for it back,
so what should I do?
**[19:41] Sister**
Why not tell them that another
friend wants to borrow it?
**[19:46] Sora**
I actually tried that, but they
just apologized and brushed it off.
**[19:51] Sister**
I would try writing a letter, then.
**[19:54] Sora**
Do you really think someone who'd
brush it off would even read it?
**[19:57] Sister**
Not for them, but for their parents.
**[20:00] Sora**
Going to the parents?!
**[20:01] Sister**
They will then speak to your friend.
**[20:04] Sister**
That should get them to pay
attention and return your book.
**[20:07] Sora**
Okay, I better go buy some stationery!
**[20:12] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:14] Uma**
I'm the one who borrowed it, Sister!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:20] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Virtual-san is looking! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
**[20:26] Everyone**
Okay, we've got a letter here.
**[20:29] Akari**
It's from pen name "Tom Is Pen"-san.
**[20:31] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:35] Akari**
"Lately, I can't stop playing video games."
**[20:37] Akari**
"Please talk about your favorite games..."
**[20:40] Akari**
"Without using any English words."
**[20:42] Mito**
Why?
***SIGN*** Theme:
Your Favorite
Video Games
***SIGN*** * No English Allowed
**[20:47] Akari**
Ready... start!
***SIGN*** Theme: Talk about your favorite
video games (no English allowed)
**[20:48] Hime**
Gong!
**[20:49] Hina**
Your favorite... g-ga—
**[20:51] Hime**
Games!
***SIGN*** Game
**[20:52] Mito**
Tanaka!
**[20:55] Akari**
Wait, hang on, I have to count every foul!
**[20:57] Hinata**
Wait, Akari, that's...
***SIGN*** Count
**[21:00] Akari**
This is really hard, guys! Give me a break!
**[21:03] Mito**
Well, I enjoy romance games.
**[21:05] Everyone**
Oh, romance games!
**[21:06] Mito**
The cool ones, especially.
**[21:08] Akari**
What kind of ty...
**[21:08] Hime**
The ones with stories!
**[21:10] Akari**
Uh, never mind, I mean wh-what kinda..
**[21:11] Someone**
Tai?
**[21:12] Akari**
What kind of... Thai?
**[21:13] Someone**
Thai!
**[21:14] Akari**
No!
**[21:16] Mito**
Akari!
**[21:17] Mito**
Don't try and narrow down the genre of game!
**[21:19] Hime**
Hey, Mito-chan said "game"! You said game!
***SIGN*** Game
**[21:22] Mito**
This is chaos!
**[21:24] Akari**
That does it for this week!
**[21:26] Akari**
And so, until next week...
**[21:29] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Roboko
**[23:09] Roboko**
Hello, robo! I'm the super
advanced robotic Vtuber, Roboko!
**[23:13] Roboko**
I'm sure you've all had your
glasses fog up before, right?
**[23:17] Roboko**
Like when you go indoors on a cold day,
**[23:20] Roboko**
when you're wearing a face mask,
**[23:21] Roboko**
or when you're drinking some hot coffee!
**[23:24] Roboko**
Wow, can you imagine how hard it'd be to see
if you drank hot coffee with a face mask on?
**[23:30] Roboko**
Wait, did somebody just call me junk?
***SIGN*** Next time is "One Cannot Live Without Loafing!"
***SIGN*** Next Time
"One Cannot Live Without Loafing!"
***SIGN*** And next week, Virtual-san will be looking again!
# E5 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6DKGZ38R/untitled)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
Y'know, the scientific name for
gorillas is *gorilla gorilla*!
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey! So what
about virtual gorillas?
**[00:08] Peanut**
They don't need one, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:13] Hinata**
Wow, look at all the books.
**[00:16] Mito**
Oh, *Hamlet*.
**[00:17] Mito**
"To be or not to be? That is the question."
**[00:20] Hina**
What brought all that on?
**[00:21] Mito**
It's a famous line written by Shakespeare.
**[00:23] Mito**
You see it come up online a lot nowadays.
**[00:26] Shiro**
Oh, I know him!
**[00:27] Shiro**
"Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?"
That guy, right?
**[00:31] Mito**
Right! He's an incredibly
famous poet and playwright.
**[00:35] Hime**
Siroet! Can I bring you
home with me tonight?
**[00:38] Shiro**
Okey-dokey!
**[00:40] Mirai**
There's no time for this, everyone!
We must get ready for the opening!
**[00:43] Hime**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[00:44] Shiro**
It's nearly time for the title call!
**[00:48] Mito**
Uh... we know.
**[00:49] Hinata**
I'm... uh, no, I am ready as well!
**[00:52] Hina**
Let us sally forth, then,
unto the title call!
**[00:55] Hina**
Ready and...
**[00:56] Everyone**
Virtual-san is...
**[00:58] Everyone**
Virtual-san is...
**[00:59] Everyone**
Virtual-san is...
**[01:00] Everyone**
Looking!
**[01:05] Hime**
Yeah!
**[01:06] Mito**
What the heck?
**[02:50] Mugi**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:06] Kaede**
Everyone, we've been slacking off lately!
**[03:08] Kaede**
At this rate, we'll never be
able to conquer the galaxy!
**[03:10] Kaede**
Which is why I've been thinking...
**[03:12] Miria**
I want to hear Kaede-chan's plan!
**[03:14] Kaede**
To destroy the planets of every Vtuber,
we need to infiltrate them!
**[03:17] Kaede**
So this is what I've come up with...
**[03:19] Kaede**
We need to master mimicry,
so we can impersonate other people!
**[03:23] Haruto**
I see! We make others
think we're someone else,
**[03:26] Haruto**
and once their guard is down, defeat them!
**[03:28] Haruto**
Excellent idea, chief!
**[03:30] Miria**
I'm not that good at impressions, though.
**[03:33] Miria**
Ryo-kun is the one who is!
**[03:35] Ryo**
I'm not that good at it, either.
**[03:38] Miria**
Mirai Akari-chan!
**[03:39] Ryo**
Hello! Mirai Akari here!
**[03:41] Miria**
Nekomiya Hinata-chan.
**[03:42] Ryo**
Yahoo guys, how you doing?
Nekomiya Hinata here.
**[03:46] Miria**
Tanaka Hime-chan!
**[03:47] Ryo**
Hao! I'm Tanaka Hime! Yay!
**[03:49] Miria**
Peanuts-kun.
**[03:51] Ryo**
This is really solid ground.
**[03:52] Kaede**
Ryo-kun, you're incredible!
**[03:54] Haruto**
You can infiltrate enemy
territory on your own, Ryo!
**[03:56] Kaede**
What about the rest of you?
**[03:58] Kaede**
You seem like you might have a few, Haruto.
**[03:59] Haruto**
I don't really...
**[04:01] Miria**
A certain person who says
this is a one-way street!
**[04:03] Haruto**
Can I help you with something, Kihara-kun?
**[04:06] Miria**
Someone hard to notice that plays basketball!
**[04:07] Haruto**
I'm a shadow.
**[04:08] Miria**
Not bad, Harutrash!
**[04:10] Miria**
Now it's my turn!
**[04:11] Miria**
It's that person who barfs people up!
**[04:14] Haruto**
So many mini-pink idiots! What even is this?!
**[04:18] Ryo**
Miria-chan, that's less an impersonation
and more of a shocking trick!
**[04:21] Haruto**
Not to mention useless when
it comes to infiltrating!
**[04:24] Kaede**
Okay, I'm going to go last with something
I think might be good for infiltrating.
**[04:27] Kaede**
It's a housewife who gets caught
shoplifting on reality TV!
**[04:30] Ryo**
Why would that help!?
***SIGN*** Well, I wasn't planning on shoplifting, but before I knew it, it was in of my purse.
***SIGN*** Can you just let me go? I'll pay for it.
***SIGN*** I told you, I wasn't shoplifting!
**[04:40] Haruto**
Hey, I think the chief might have
taken too well to her role!
**[04:44] Ryo**
Miria-chan, you can stop throwing up!
**[04:45] Kaede**
Please, just don't tell
my husband about this!
**[04:48] Narration**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[04:58] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[05:01] Grandma**
"Uogokoro areba mizugokoro."
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Uogokoro Areba
Mizugokoro
**[05:05] Banner**
That's the phrase.
**[05:08] Banner**
It refers to how being shown good will
can encourage someone to do the same.
**[05:13] Granny**
I thought I'd talk a bit about Valentine's Day
and White Day this week.
**[05:18] Granny**
Valentine's Day started becoming a fixture
in Japan in the latter half of the 1970s.
**[05:24] Granny**
And White Day in the first half of the 1980s.
**[05:29] Granny**
The specifics about the dates weren't
really commonly known at the time,
**[05:33] ---**
so it took them a while to
actually take a hold, culturally.
**[05:37] Granny**
There are all kinds of interesting
chocolates out there now, aren't there?
**[05:42] Granny**
You know, like glasses or bats!
Like, chocolate bats...
**[05:45] Granny**
I think it'd be wonderful if this program
**[05:47] ---**
was a chance to be immortalized
in chocolate myself.
**[05:50] Granny**
A life-sized chocolate Kobayashi Sachiko!
**[05:53] Granny**
We'll call it...
**[05:54] Granny**
Godivava.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Lost Alien Akuhato
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[06:09] Hat**
My homeland, the Ugarid Nebula,
was destroyed by invaders,
**[06:13] Hat**
and I have come to Earth as a refugee,
the Alien Akuhato.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[06:24] Alice**
Virtual-san is looking! Yeah!
**[06:30] Hinata**
Hello, everybody!
**[06:33] Hinata**
You keeping it virtual out there?
**[06:34] Hinata**
Because it's time for Virtual Radio!
**[06:37] Hinata**
We've got another great virtual
song to introduce today!
**[06:41] Hinata**
This one...
**[06:43] Hinata**
...is a cute and pop magical number,
**[06:46] Hinata**
where the "Hello! Hello!" calls are so catchy,
they'll leave you with a spring in your step!
**[06:49] Hinata**
It's a super pop and sexy
virtual cutie cool song!
**[06:54] Hinata**
Let's throw it on now! This is
Mirai Akari's "Mirai to Mirai."
***SIGN*** "Mirai to Mirai"
By: Mirai Akari
**[07:21] Hinata**
That's a nice virtual song!
**[07:24] Hinata**
That was "Mirai to Mirai" by Mirai Akari.
**[07:28] Hinata**
See you next time! Keep it V!
**[07:38] Ryo**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[07:44] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:45] Aoi**
There!
**[07:45] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:46] Aoi**
There!
**[07:47] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:47] Aoi**
There!
**[07:48] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:49] Aoi**
There! There! There!
**[07:50] Gori**
Hello... Hello... Hello... Hello...
**[07:54] Aoi**
Huh? G-Gori-chan?
**[08:00] Gori**
Hello!
**[08:01] Aoi**
I can't reach that far!
**[08:03] Both**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[08:05] Gori**
Hello.
**[08:08] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[08:13] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[08:20] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[08:21] Hime**
Akari-san, we've got ever such big trouble!
**[08:24] Akari**
Well, what's going on?
**[08:25] Hime**
Someone with the pen name "Ochabba-kun"
is in trouble! They've got problems!
**[08:27] Hime**
Hurry, take it! Read it, read it now!
**[08:29] Akari**
Okay, fork it over, come on!
**[08:32] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello!
**[08:33] Hime**
H'lo.
**[08:35] Akari**
"I loaned my friend a
video game a while ago,
**[08:37] Akari**
and it's now been three months
with no sign of them returning it."
**[08:40] Akari**
"Do you think they intend on keeping it?"
**[08:42] Akari**
"They might have just forgotten about it,
**[08:43] Akari**
so I have trouble bringing up, because I
don't want them to think I'm accusing them."
***SIGN*** Problem: A loaned game isn't being returned
**[08:47] Hime**
This is an awkward one!
**[08:49] Akari**
True enough...
**[08:50] Hime**
Did he swipe it?
**[08:50] Akari**
But three months is a weird
amount of time, y'know?
**[08:54] Hime**
Yeah, three months!
**[08:55] Hime**
I mean, the game might
take that long to finish!
**[08:57] Akari**
True, if it's a longer one!
**[08:59] Hime**
Right, right!
**[09:00] Akari**
And you're friends, so it's hard
to really come down hard on it.
**[09:03] Hime**
Right, totally!
**[09:04] Akari**
What to do?
**[09:06] Hime**
This is a hard one!
**[09:08] Hime**
Huh?
**[09:10] ---**
Mirai-san?
**[09:12] Hime**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:13] Hikari**
The best thing is to wait patiently.
**[09:16] Hikari**
I mean, there are other games to play!
**[09:18] Yami**
You need to dox people like this.
**[09:21] Yami**
Get some proof they swiped
your game and let 'er rip!
**[09:23] Hikari**
But they're friends! Could you please not?
**[09:26] Yami**
Well, you take it from here, Akari.
**[09:29] Hime**
Hello?
**[09:31] Hime**
Hello! Mirai-san!
**[09:34] Akari**
Sorry! I'm back!
**[09:35] Hime**
Welcome home.
**[09:36] Akari**
Not sure what that was about.
**[09:37] Hime**
Must be rough!
**[09:39] Akari**
Well, pen name Ochabba-kun,
I'm gonna get to the bottom line.
**[09:44] Hime**
Is this it?!
**[09:46] ---**
She's going to show her bottom! Line?
**[09:48] Akari**
You need to have your friend
become a Let's Player!
**[09:52] Hime**
Let's Plays?!
**[09:53] Akari**
Right!
**[09:54] Akari**
You set things up for them,
**[09:56] Akari**
so that they can become
a famous Let's Player!
**[09:58] Akari**
Their handle can be "1BRO."
**[10:00] Akari**
1BRO? But they're not brothers!
**[10:03] Akari**
What the heck? What the
heck's that about, then?
**[10:05] Akari**
Then how about "Ninja"?
**[10:06] Hime**
Ninja?! That's one lonely ninja!
**[10:08] Hime**
Then, after they're famous,
**[10:10] Hime**
you set things up so that their stream is
going to show their LINE window instead!
**[10:15] Hime**
Then you capture an image of
a LINE message where you say,
**[10:17] ---**
"Ever since you swiped that game a year ago,
and my heart and body have been aching!"
**[10:20] ---**
and stick it on the stream.
**[10:23] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go check out ○Bro's videos!
**[10:27] Akari**
Make sure you watch the TLOU one, Tanaka!
**[10:29] Hime**
"Hey everyone, good morneveningafternoon!"
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[10:42] Hinata**
There!
**[10:48] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[10:50] Hinata**
If falling onto the road to
school would be a game over,
**[10:52] Hinata**
and I needed to get from
one side to the other,
**[10:54] Hinata**
maybe the first thing is to
hook onto the stone wall,
**[10:56] ---**
then the overhang to get onto
the roof of that building,
**[10:59] Hinata**
and then try a big jump, which should
just barely let me catch the edge.
**[11:04] Hinata**
I think that'd work.
**[11:05] Hinata**
But maybe the safer way is to
just jump from the stone wall.
**[11:10] Hinata**
What a choice.
**[11:12] Hinata**
But y'know, if I can catch
onto the wall on the right,
**[11:15] Hinata**
the rest of the way should be simple!
**[11:18] Hinata**
Well, I wonder, maybe...
**[11:20] Hinata**
I might break some sort
of speedrunning record!
**[11:32] Hinata**
Yeah, it doesn't work that
way in reality, I guess.
**[11:37] Hinata**
Guess I'll head to school.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:41] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[11:44] Shiro**
And so is Siro!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[11:51] Shiro**
Oh, it's Kaede-chan and Miria-chan! Welcome!
**[11:55] Kaede**
We are so fed up!
**[11:57] Miria**
Can we get some trivia about baths, please?
**[12:00] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:05] Shiro**
Baths, huh?
***SIGN*** "Baths"
**[12:10] Shiro**
You know about putting a towel on your head
when you're soaking in hot water, right?
**[12:14] Shiro**
Well, it turns out it's not just a
tradition about where to put your towel,
**[12:17] Shiro**
but that there's a scientific
basis for doing it!
**[12:21] Shiro**
By putting a wet towel on your
head after gently wringing it out,
**[12:25] Shiro**
the water evaporating from
it will cool your head off!
**[12:28] Shiro**
It helps prevent the kind of dizziness you can
get from soaking in hot water for too long!
**[12:33] Shiro**
By the way, in the Edo period,
there were bathhouses on boats,
**[12:37] Shiro**
which is why another word for bathtub is
"yubune," with the "bune" meaning "boat."
**[12:43] Kaede**
Wow, really?
**[12:45] Miria**
Your trivia really is
always handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Domeki Akira
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[12:54] Akira**
It's nice to meet you, everyone.
**[12:55] Akira**
My name is Domeki Akira.
**[12:58] Akira**
Now, I know my name might
mean "hundred-eyed demon,"
**[13:00] Akira**
but I'm not a youkai,
so there are no eyes on my arm.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:09] Mito**
When I think about the order
of guests I've had so far,
**[13:11] Mito**
today's will probably be that 280-year-old.
**[13:16] Elu**
Mito-Mito-chan!
**[13:18] Mito**
Hey, an elf!
**[13:19] Elu**
How mean!
**[13:20] Elu**
You know it's me, the high-minded elven
beauty from the land of elves, Elu!
**[13:24] Mito**
Could you give me your legal name, then?
**[13:26] Elu**
Snow White Paradise El Santo
Flow Wasurena Pure Pri...
**[13:29] Mito**
Sorry, my fault for asking.
**[13:31] Mito**
Well, today we're doing the ultimate "would
you rather" committee with Elu-san!
**[13:35] ---**
Here's the subject. Which
superpower would you rather have?
**[13:38] ---**
A) The power to read people's minds.
**[13:40] ---**
B) The power to see the future.
**[13:42] ---**
Elu-chan, you're not human in the
first place, so I imagine you
**[13:44] ---**
might have some kind of superpower, do you?
**[13:46] Elu**
Okay, first, discriminate much?
**[13:47] Mito**
What do you mean?
**[13:48] Elu**
But y'know, I'd like a power that'd let me
know if my forest was going to burn down.
**[13:51] Mito**
That's oddly specific.
**[13:53] Mito**
But which of these options would you prefer?
**[13:55] Elu**
I guess if I had to pick one,
I'd pick the ability to see the future.
**[13:58] Mito**
But if you could do that,
**[14:00] ---**
you might know if you're
going to die in five minutes,
**[14:04] Mito**
or that the elf forest is going
to be burned down, right?
**[14:06] Elu**
But I'd be able to choose my last words,
and make sure I've taken care of business...
**[14:10] Mito**
Things you wanted to get done?
**[14:11] Mito**
What specifically would that be?
**[14:13] Elu**
Huh... I'm not sure.
**[14:14] ---**
Maybe eat my favorite food?
**[14:15] Elu**
Well, one thing would be changing my
LINE name to "Thank you for everything."
**[14:20] Mito**
That is super morbid!
**[14:22] Mito**
Okay, it's time.
**[14:23] Mito**
Today's answer is A, the ability
to read people's minds!
**[14:27] Elu**
We didn't talk about that at all, though!
**[14:30] Mito**
If you control people's minds,
you'll never have to worry about a bad future!
**[14:32] Mito**
Live in the present!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
***SIGN*** Special Announcement
***SIGN*** The Sudden Appearance of a City
***SIGN*** Overflowing with crowds
***SIGN*** Giant Growth
***SIGN*** Transformation
***SIGN*** The secrets of the opening are about to be revealed!?
***SIGN*** Coming Soon!!
**[14:53] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[14:59] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[15:01] Unity**
Boom!
**[15:02] Unity**
Ootori Kohaku here!
**[15:04] Unity**
I'm really athletic, y'know!
**[15:07] Unity**
My dream is to become
an action star some day!
**[15:16] Unity**
Here I come!
**[15:20] Unity**
Secret technique,
**[15:20] Unity**
Curry Crou-ken!
**[15:25] Unity**
I'm sorry! I overdid it!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Akumano Maga
**[15:31] Maga**
I'm Akumano Maga.
**[15:33] Maga**
Did you know that demons
don't really have genders?
**[15:38] Maga**
Maybe I'm what you all call...
**[15:41] Maga**
An otokonoko. Maybe!
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[15:47] Hina**
Gorillaga!
**[15:48] Kerin**
Gorilla!
**[15:48] Gori**
Hello!
**[15:49] Hime**
Want to grab some banana shakes?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[15:55] Hina**
So, what are we here for this time, Hime?
**[15:58] Hime**
Well, you remember that
dark elf from last time?
**[16:02] Hime**
And when he mentioned the legendary,
beautiful god elf known throughout the land!
**[16:06] Hina**
Elu-san?
**[16:07] Hime**
Yeah!
**[16:08] Hime**
And this is forest that Elu-san revived by
**[16:10] ---**
releasing all of her aura
through an oath and a vow!
**[16:15] Hina**
Look, Hime!
**[16:18] Hime**
More Keblins!
**[16:19] Hina**
Fine, then!
**[16:21] Hina**
Expecchan Patrol!
**[16:25] Hime**
That's some crazy magic you've got, again!
**[16:27] Hina**
Look, Hime, there's another one!
**[16:31] Hime**
Personal Home Security Patrol!
**[16:35] Hina**
That's just another way of describing a NEET!
**[16:38] Hime**
I messed up! And now the Keblins are here!
**[16:43] Kerin**
Hey, what are you guys doing?
**[16:44] Both**
Th-That voice...
**[16:46] Both**
Yamikumo Kerin!
***SIGN*** Yami
***SIGN*** Yamikumo
***SIGN*** Ke
***SIGN*** Keri
***SIGN*** Kerin
**[16:51] Kerin**
You guys are here again?
**[16:53] Kerin**
Well, you're not getting away this time.
**[16:55] Hina**
N-Now hang on, Kerin, you've
got the wrong idea!
**[16:58] Hina**
The Keblins started attacking us!
**[17:00] Hime**
Hina, we've got no choice!
**[17:02] Hime**
After all, we're Kerin Slayers!
**[17:04] Hime**
It's our job to exterminate dark elves!
**[17:07] Kerin**
Suits me fine.
**[17:08] Kerin**
I'm gonna blow you both up!
**[17:13] Kerin**
It's the ultimate super
maximum magic, Buchitema!
**[17:16] Kerin**
Get out of Elu-san's forest, you two!
**[17:19] Hime**
We'll have to use our
ultimate combo attack, then!
**[17:23] Hime**
Let's go, Hina!
**[17:24] Hina**
I get what you mean, Hime!
**[17:26] Hime & Hina**
In the name of the Girly Girl Empire!
**[17:29] Hime**
This hand of mine is burning pink!
**[17:32] Hina**
Its loud roar tells us to grasp success!
**[17:35] Hime & Hina**
Erupting Sekiha Hao Ken!
**[17:39] Kerin**
Blast 'em!
**[17:42] Hime & Hina**
Hao!
**[17:47] Elu**
Hold it right there!
**[17:49] Everybody**
That voice... could it be?!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:01] Uma**
Can you hear me out, Sister?
**[18:04] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:05] Uma**
There's this girl I want to tell how I—
**[18:07] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[18:13] Sister**
What is it?
**[18:14] Sora**
I think I've put on weight by
snacking at night too much!
**[18:17] Sora**
Oh man, what am I gonna do?!
**[18:19] Sister**
You've lost to the sweet temptation
of late night snacks, I see.
**[18:24] Sora**
Yeah! The more I try to resist, the better
it tastes when I finally eat something!
**[18:29] Sister**
Let me suggest a snack that should
**[18:31] ---**
fulfill that sensation while also
limiting how guilty you feel.
**[18:33] Sora**
Really?!
**[18:34] Sister**
It's made from a type of
algae so it's full of
**[18:37] ---**
minerals and nutrients:
agar jelly with anmitsu syrup.
**[18:39] Sister**
It's got a lot of dietary fiber to
suppress carbohydrate absorption,
**[18:43] ---**
which should also help relieve your hunger.
**[18:45] Sora**
I get it!
**[18:46] Sora**
I'm gonna get my fill of
agar jelly starting today!
**[18:51] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[18:53] Uma**
Jiggly agar jelly!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:00] Kaede**
Why, why?! Virtual-san is looking!
**[19:05] Shiro**
Well, we've got a letter here.
**[19:08] Shiro**
It's from pen name "Urban Riemann."
**[19:10] Everybody**
Thanks for writing!
**[19:13] Shiro**
"I'm getting tired of being an officer worker
and thinking about a change in careers."
**[19:17] Shiro**
"What kind of occupation
should I pursue next?"
**[19:20] Shiro**
"By the way, my hobbies are gourmet dining,
reading, and walking."
**[19:26] Shiro**
So he writes, and he's
talking about jobs, right?
**[19:29] Shiro**
Do you all have any kind
of jobs that you like
**[19:31] Shiro**
that show up in anime or manga?
**[19:34] Akari**
Me, me! Vampire!
***SIGN*** Favorite jobs from
anime and manga
**[19:35] Hime**
Papaya?
**[19:37] Hina**
Sounds tasty!
**[19:37] Akari**
No!
**[19:39] Akari**
I mean, I like papaya.
**[19:41] Akari**
I said vampire!
**[19:42] Somebody**
Vampires!
**[19:43] Hina**
Oh, right!
**[19:44] Hime**
I wanna be, like...
**[19:45] Hime**
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh!
**[19:46] Shiro**
A ninja!
**[19:47] Hime**
I wanna be zipping and zapping all over!
**[19:49] Hinata**
Then I'm gonna be king of the pirates.
**[19:51] Hime**
Sounds good!
**[19:53] Mito**
I think I'd like to be a mage.
**[19:56] Shiro**
Mito-mito, you give me more
of a sage vibe than a mage.
**[20:00] Mito**
I suppose that'd work, too.
**[20:02] Shiro**
I think Akari-chan would make a good
gadabout, since her costume is so cute...
**[20:07] Akari**
For real?
**[20:07] Akari**
What's a gadabout do, anyway?
**[20:09] Shiro**
Well, they have really high luck stats.
**[20:12] Akari**
Luck shats?
**[20:14] Hime**
Shats?
**[20:15] Shiro**
No!
**[20:15] Hinata**
Akari-chan...
**[20:17] Akari**
Sorry, sorry, sorry!
**[20:20] Mito**
You're so bad, Akari-san.
**[20:22] Akari**
I thought she was talking
about high level shats!
**[20:25] Hime**
I did, too!
**[20:27] Shiro**
I think I'd be a white wizard.
**[20:30] Hime**
That's perfect!
**[20:31] Hina**
I'd wanna get healed by you!
**[20:33] Hina**
I think I'd want to be a gambler,
something that's kind of cool!
**[20:38] Hinata**
We've got a millionaire!
**[20:39] Hina**
Suzuki plays hard! You know?
**[20:44] Shiro**
So what kind of job should Urban Riemann,
who sent in the letter, get?
***SIGN*** What kind of job should
Urban Riemann get?
**[20:50] Shiro**
His hobbies are gourmet dining,
reading, and walking.
**[20:53] Mito**
Dining, reading, and walking?
**[20:55] Mito**
Is there a job where you eat?
**[20:57] Hime**
Sounds good to me!
**[20:58] Shiro**
Like a professional speed eater?
**[21:00] Hime**
Oh, I love those contests!
**[21:03] Mirai**
But what if he loses weight doing it?
**[21:05] Hina**
He could be a big eater who's skinny?
**[21:07] Hime**
Would that be a good fit for TV?
**[21:09] Hime**
Maybe?
**[21:10] Mito**
For walking, he could walk
around while eating.
**[21:12] Mito**
But that's a recipe for
smacking into something.
**[21:14] Hime**
Smackeroonie!
**[21:16] Akari**
Say that again, Tanaka?
**[21:17] Hime**
Sma... don't wanna.
**[21:19] Hime**
Don't try and make me say that sorta thing!
**[21:20] Mito**
She caught on... well done.
**[21:24] Shiro**
Well, that's it for this
week, so until next week...
**[21:29] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Weatheroid Type A Airi (Ponko)
**[23:10] Airi**
Good evening everybody!
**[23:13] Airi**
I'm Type A Airi, the weatheroid!
**[23:15] Airi**
I warned everybody about the cold
weather coming up the other day
**[23:19] Airi**
and ended up catching a cold myself!
**[23:21] Airi**
It's still possible, even
when you're an android!
**[23:23] Airi**
My nose won't stop dripping oil!
**[23:24] Airi**
Are any of you feeling under the weather?
**[23:27] Airi**
When you're feeling sick in virtual town,
it's called restarting.
**[23:30] Airi**
So next time you're feeling bad,
try restarting, and hang in there!
**[23:32] Airi**
Next time, it's "PP Dance Festival."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"PP Dance Festival"
**[23:35] Airi**
Virtual-san will be looking next week, too!
# E6 - PP Dance Festival
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR8D7N7WR/pp-dance-festival)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
Y'know, Oda Nobunaga used to
call Hideyoshi a "bald rat."
**[00:07] Uma**
Yo! Bald peanut!
**[00:08] Peanut**
I'm not bald, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:13] Hina**
There's a gym and this huge library.
**[00:16] Hina**
This dorm is really something! I love it!
**[00:19] Shiro**
Considering how big it is, maybe there's
an entrance to a secret room somewhere!
**[00:23] Hime**
Like the kind where you say
a password for it to open?
**[00:26] Hime**
Hm... Open, Comăneci!
**[00:29] Hime**
Wow, something actually came out! Awesome!
**[00:33] Hinata**
What the heck is this? Holy cow!
It's a whole secret base!
**[00:37] Hinata**
So cool! What's it for?
What's the special mission?
**[00:39] Akari**
Oh, Hinata's hype meter is maxed out!
**[00:43] Mito**
Tanaka, take it away.
**[00:44] Hime**
Aye-aye, sir!
**[00:45] ---**
This is being called "Operation:
Let's All Work Hard to
**[00:47] ---**
Actually Do the Title Call
so the Opening Can Play!"
**[00:50] ---**
Ready, and...
**[00:51] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[02:37] Kaede**
I choose you! Virtual-san is looking.
**[02:50] Kaede**
Last week ended up turning into
a talent contest, somehow.
**[02:53] Ryo**
Especially in Miria-chan's case.
**[02:54] Miria**
It's fine! Those mini-mes
were really cute, right?
**[02:57] Haruto**
We'd be in dire straights
with any more pink fools!
**[03:00] Miria**
Oh, right! I came up with a new plan!
**[03:03] Kaede**
Just what we needed!
Let's hear it, Miria-chan!
**[03:06] Miria**
I call it "Operation: Every Rose Has
Its Toxins! Deadly Poison Cooking!"
**[03:11] Haruto**
Cooking? You maniac, are you
trying to get the chief to—?!
**[03:14] Miria**
Shh!
**[03:14] Kaede**
Trying to get me to do what?
**[03:16] Miria**
Well, Kaede-chan, since we'll need to take
our time and have a briefing on the plan,
**[03:20] Miria**
maybe you should make
some cookies beforehand!
**[03:22] Ryo**
Miria-chan, you can't—
**[03:24] Kaede**
Cookies, huh! It's been a while!
**[03:27] Kaede**
I'm gonna do my best, then!
**[03:29] ---**
Which way was the kitchen again?
**[03:30] Kaede**
I think this is the first time
I've cooked on this battleship!
**[03:32] Haruto**
You pink fool! How could you
incite the chief like this?!
**[03:35] Miria**
Shut up! You know as well as I do how
powerful Kaede-chan's deadly poison cooking is!
**[03:39] Ryo**
Miria-chan, you can't...
**[03:41] Ryo**
Our sweet chief is going to become a vessel
for something from another reality...
**[03:44] Miria**
But if we feed the stuff to our
enemies, they'll be totally toast!
**[03:46] Haruto**
You do make a type of sense, but...
**[03:50] Ryo**
What was that?!
**[03:51] Haruto**
An enemy attack?! Damn them!
**[03:53] Miria**
No! The explosion came from the kitchen!
**[03:57] Ryo**
That was the chief!
**[03:58] Miria**
Oh, no! I never bothered to look
into how Kaede-chan actually cooks!
**[04:02] Haruto**
At this rate, the battleship will be scuttled
before we can feed our foes the cookies!
**[04:06] Kaede**
Sorry for scaring you all!
**[04:08] Kaede**
It's been a while, so I tried my best!
**[04:10] Kaede**
The cookies are ready, though!
**[04:12] Haruto**
Such an aura! Is it dark matter?!
**[04:15] Miria**
Talk about intense.
**[04:17] Kaede**
Come on! Eat up! And we'll go over the plan.
**[04:20] Miria**
Kaede-chan, the plan is to give
these cookies to our enemies,
**[04:24] Miria**
and then take them out while
they're enjoying the snack!
**[04:27] Ryo**
Okay, good explanation!
**[04:28] Kaede**
Oh, so that's the plan!
**[04:31] Kaede**
I'll make some more, then!
**[04:32] Kaede**
That way you all can eat these!
**[04:35] Kaede**
Go on, don't be shy!
**[04:36] Haruto**
Hey, pink fool, we're gonna
have to brace ourselves.
**[04:39] Miria**
Harutrash, you...
**[04:42] Miria**
I guess it'd be rude to
Kaede-chan, otherwise.
**[04:44] Miria**
Ready to do this, Ryo-kun?
**[04:47] Everybody**
Thanks for the cookies.
***SIGN*** 1 Minute Later
**[04:54] Kaede**
Guys! Who did this to you?!
**[04:57] Miria**
I knew my plan was a good one.
**[05:04] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
**[05:12] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[05:16] Grandma**
Choda no Retsu.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Choda no Retsu
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:19] Banner**
As in, a particularly long line.
**[05:21] Banner**
Are there any places you can think
of when it comes to long lines?
**[05:26] Banner**
For me, it's movie theaters.
**[05:29] Grandma**
In the old days, no matter where you went,
they used to always be really crowded.
**[05:33] Grandma**
You'd end up having to stand to watch!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:35] Grandma**
That was actually something that
was allowed in theaters back then.
**[05:41] Grandma**
This was on top of doing
double and triple features.
**[05:44] Grandma**
A particular memory I have
about going to the movies
**[05:47] ---**
is the music acts that would play during
the intermissions for double features.
**[05:52] Grandma**
This was actually a thing, in the old days.
**[05:54] Grandma**
The screen would rise up,
and there'd be a stage behind it.
**[05:57] Grandma**
With performances by singers and bands.
**[06:00] Grandma**
They'd be on standby behind the screen
until it was time for them to perform,
**[06:06] Grandma**
so they could actually enjoy the movie
from back there while they were waiting!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:11] Grandma**
And then after the movie ended,
they'd play in the theater again.
**[06:15] Grandma**
By the way, a movie that made a big
impression on me at the time was *Mothra*!
**[06:23] Grandma**
I'm a bit like her myself, nowadays.
Whoosh! You know? Whoosh!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:31] Grandma**
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh!
**[06:37] Grandma**
Whoosh!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:39] Grandma**
Whoosh!
**[06:42] Grandma**
Whoosh!
**[06:49] Akari**
V-V-Virtual-san is looking!
**[06:53] Aoi**
Y-You don't have to look, if you want.
**[06:57] Aoi**
But I want you to.
**[06:59] Aoi**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[07:07] Gori**
What's the matter?
**[07:09] Aoi**
Nothing.
**[07:11] Gori**
If you don't mind talking to
a gorilla, you can tell me.
**[07:14] Aoi**
Thank you, Gori-chan.
**[07:21] Aoi**
See, I...
**[07:22] Gori**
Hello?
**[07:24] Aoi**
...wanna go into space.
**[07:28] Gori**
Hello!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:33] Gori**
Hello.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[07:38] Hinata**
This is bad! Real bad! But I can't panic.
**[07:42] Hinata**
It'll be rough, though.
**[07:44] Hinata**
There are two generators
I still need to repair.
**[07:47] Hinata**
Probably on the other side
of this bridge, but...
**[07:49] Hinata**
But should I really go across?
**[07:51] Hinata**
It'd mean leaving the other
survivors on this side.
**[07:55] Hinata**
In that other round, I let them
all die and survived by myself.
**[07:59] Hinata**
Maybe that's why I have no friends.
**[08:02] Hinata**
But if the killer crosses the
bridge, they'll be able to
**[08:05] ---**
see me in the distance,
and I'll be dead in no time!
**[08:08] Hinata**
Dead or alive!
**[08:13] Hinata**
Okay, let's do it!
**[08:14] Hinata**
Even if it means betraying the others,
I've gotta find those generators!
**[08:19] Hinata**
Crap, I ran.
**[08:21] Hinata**
I'm gonna die!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[08:27] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[08:33] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[08:40] Akari**
What is it, Hime?
**[08:42] Hime**
Man, I'm rusty! Here, read this!
**[08:44] Hime**
Just read it already!
**[08:45] Akari**
Okay, okay!
**[08:48] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san."
**[08:48] Hime**
H'lo.
**[08:49] Akari**
Hello!
**[08:50] Hime**
H'lo!
**[08:50] Akari**
"The other day, I heard
rumors that a friend was
**[08:53] ---**
badmouthing me, and got depressed about it."
**[08:55] Akari**
"These weren't things
said directly to my face,
**[08:58] ---**
but I thought this person and I were good
friends, so it came as a huge shock."
**[09:02] Akari**
"I've had trouble talking
to them ever since."
**[09:05] ---**
"What do you think I should do?"
***SIGN*** Problem: Badmouthed by a friend
**[09:07] Hime**
That's sad!
**[09:10] Akari**
Hey Hime, try badmouthing me!
**[09:13] Hime**
Badmouth you?!
**[09:14] Akari**
Yeah.
**[09:15] Hime**
Y-You got black panties!
**[09:16] Akari**
Uh, hang on, is that supposed to be bad?
**[09:18] Hime**
W-Was it supposed to be?
**[09:20] Akari**
Don't you always show
off your panties, Hime?
**[09:22] Hime**
Yes, I am! Here, see?
**[09:24] Hime**
Whoo.
**[09:25] Hime**
Whacha think?
**[09:28] Hime**
Uh, Mirai-san? Hey, are you there?
**[09:30] Hime**
Mirai-san!
**[09:32] Yami**
How about a rap battle where you both
just get it all out in the open?
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:36] Hikari**
That's not a bad idea!
**[09:38] Yami**
If you're gonna talk crap to someone else,
**[09:40] Yami**
you may as well say it to the
person you've got an issue with.
**[09:43] Hikari**
Wow, Yami-chan, you're making sense!
**[09:46] Yami**
Oh, damn, that's kind of OOC.
**[09:50] Hime**
Hello? Hello! Earth to Mirai-san!
**[09:54] Akari**
Oh man, something smells a lot like panties.
**[09:57] Hime**
Smells?!
**[09:58] Akari**
Y'know, like pumpkins. I wonder what it is?
**[10:02] Akari**
Anyway, pen name "Aruto-kun"!
**[10:04] Akari**
Here's the bottom line!
**[10:07] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
**[10:11] Akari**
You need to embrace your friend.
**[10:13] ---**
Period!
**[10:15] Hime**
So fast!
**[10:16] Hime**
So the idea is to shut the person who
was saying bad things up, huh?! Awesome!
**[10:21] Akari**
Tanaka, do you know what I mean
when I say "embrace" them?
**[10:24] Hime**
Embrace? No. I'm just a little girl, so nope.
**[10:27] Akari**
Well, what you do is...
***SIGN*** and then their so
then you the over
to , and then gets ,
and you put into
with aimed at...
***SIGN*** ° Since it was full of , this scene was
**[10:34] Hime**
I get it! It's some kind
of beeping party, right?
**[10:37] Akari**
Bingo!
**[10:38] Hime**
Okay, I'm gonna go to the bookstore
and look up some books on beeping!
**[10:41] Akari**
Wait!
**[10:42] Akari**
Wait, wait! You're too young
to mess with that stuff!
**[10:44] Akari**
They won't even let you into
that corner of the book store!
**[10:47] Hime**
Beep, peep, pee, Peenut-kun! Yeah!
**[10:51] Peanuts**
That's not how you spell my name!
**[11:01] Hinata**
Hello, everybody!
**[11:04] Hinata**
You keeping it virtual out there?
**[11:05] Hinata**
Because it's time for Virtual Radio!
**[11:08] Hinata**
We've got another virtual banger
for you today. You ready for this?
**[11:13] Hinata**
This one...
**[11:14] Hinata**
has got a wild style, but refined production,
a real goriginal song!
**[11:17] Hinata**
The yearning in the lyrics left me
with a g-ape-ing hole in my heart,
**[11:22] Hinata**
a real miraculous, heart-string-twinging,
lovely, drumming ook-ook song!
**[11:26] Hinata**
With his natural strength,
he gives you wild power!
**[11:28] Hinata**
Let me throw it on for you.
**[11:30] Hinata**
This is Virtual Gorilla's "Like a Gorilla!"
***SIGN*** "Like a Gorilla"
By: Virtual Gorilla
**[12:02] Hinata**
Now that's a nice virtual song!
**[12:05] Hinata**
That was "Like A Gorilla" by Virtual Gorilla!
**[12:09] Hinata**
See you next time, gori gori master!
**[12:19] Toya**
Yeah! Virtual-san is looking! Ready, go!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:27] Shiro**
Oh, Iroha-chan! Welcome!
**[12:30] Kaede**
I am so fed up!
**[12:33] Kaede**
Can I get some trivia about
strawberries, please?
***SIGN*** "Strawberries"
**[12:41] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[12:43] Shiro**
Did you know that strawberries
aren't actually berries?
**[12:50] Iroha**
Mm, I could go for more.
**[12:53] Iroha**
Give me another.
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[13:00] Shiro**
Well, two strawberries contain about as
much Vitamin C as your typical lemon.
**[13:05] Shiro**
But that's if we're talking
about typically-sized ones.
**[13:08] Shiro**
In 2015, the Guinness World Record
for biggest strawberry weighed
**[13:14] ---**
250 grams, and was 12 cm long and
8 cm wide, like a meat bun!
**[13:21] Shiro**
It makes you wonder how many lemons
worth of vitamin C that one had, huh?
**[13:24] Shiro**
And it turns out that this record
is held by a farmer in Fukuoka!
**[13:29] Shiro**
And did you know that strawberries
are part of the Rosaceae family?
**[13:32] Shiro**
Belonging to the same family as roses
adds a bit of wonder, doesn't it?
**[13:36] Shiro**
Now you know those little things
that poke out of a strawberry?
**[13:42] Shiro**
You might think, aren't the
thorns on roses on the stem?
**[13:46] Shiro**
Well, it turns out, the part of the
strawberries we eat are considered part of the stem!
**[13:50] Shiro**
And the little grain things on
strawberries are actually their seeds!
**[13:57] Iroha**
Wow, really?
**[13:59] ---**
Your trivia is always handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Satou-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[14:11] Satou**
I am so tired today...
**[14:14] Satou**
I know!
**[14:15] Satou**
I can watch *Virtual-san*!
**[14:18] Satou**
But I'm so sleepy.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[14:25] Mito**
Now then, who did I manage to drag in today?
**[14:33] Rin**
Mito-san!
**[14:34] Rin**
Do you know where I can find
some shredded-looking gentlemen?
**[14:36] Mito**
ShizuRin-senpai, calm down.
**[14:38] Mito**
That was just a lie I told you to
get you to show up for the segment!
**[14:41] Mito**
Now then, ShizuRin-senpai, it's time for the
the ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[14:45] Rin**
But...
**[14:46] Mito**
Which would you rather see in person?
**[14:48] Mito**
A) Cyber Girl Siro-chan changing clothes.
**[14:51] Mito**
Or B) Tokino Sora-chan changing clothes.
**[14:53] Rin**
I'm watching them change?!
**[14:54] Mito**
That's right.
**[14:55] Rin**
Well, I'd like to see more of Siro-san,
**[14:57] ---**
but since I'm friends with
Sora, I guess I'd pick B?
**[15:00] Mito**
Oh, B, then?
**[15:01] Mito**
I figured that you'd be so fixated on abs
that you'd go for that one, ShizuRin-Senpai.
**[15:04] Rin**
Good point. I guess it's because... y'know?
**[15:05] ---**
How Sora-san sings so hard?
**[15:07] Mito**
True enough.
**[15:08] Rin**
It makes me wonder how
ripped her abs must be.
**[15:10] Mito**
Yeah. Idols have to be in shape, after all.
**[15:12] Mito**
But then again,
Siro-chan is an idol cadet herself.
**[15:15] Rin**
Yeah.
**[15:16] Mito**
But Siro-chan kind of
gives off a fluffy feel.
**[15:18] Rin**
Now that you mention it,
I bet her tummy is amazing.
**[15:20] Mito**
It just comes down to
different types of appeal.
**[15:22] ---**
She's the good kind of curvy.
**[15:24] Mito**
Where there's just enough meat,
that's Siro-san!
***SIGN*** *This is her personal opinion
**[15:27] Mito**
These are crucial details.
**[15:28] Rin**
I kind of feel like we've got
a difference of opinion here.
**[15:29] Mito**
Maybe.
**[15:30] Mito**
But y'know, if the network is letting us talk
about this, I wonder if they'll let us see it?
**[15:36] Rin**
Oh, you're getting my hopes up.
**[15:37] Mito**
We can actually watch them change, right?
**[15:40] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[15:41] Rin**
Ding dong ding dong...
**[15:41] Mito**
That being the case the answer is...
**[15:43] Mito**
A! Watching Cyber Girl
Siro-chan change, in person!
**[15:46] Rin**
I kind of want to know why you
bothered asking me on, then?
**[15:48] Mito**
And now the committee is closed!
**[15:50] Mito**
If you want to see Siro-san change,
I can arrange it for 10,000 yen!
**[15:52] Mito**
If that's the right answer,
we can actually show it, right?
**[15:54] Mito**
Ask the network if we can put—
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[16:00] Elu**
Virtual-san is looking, el-el!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[16:07] Unity**
It's okay! I broke it, so I can fix it!
**[16:11] Unity**
No real reason to be sure of that, but...
**[16:12] Unity**
That doesn't look right.
**[16:15] Unity**
How am I gonna explain this to Dad?
**[16:18] Unity**
I don't know where people get the idea that
I wreck any machine I touch, anyway.
**[16:21] Unity**
Shouldn't a combat robot
be more durable, anyway?
**[16:25] Unity**
Let's see...
**[16:27] Unity**
No! Calm down, just wait a second, and...
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[16:37] Lulu**
Good-lulu morning everyone!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Ayamaki Lulu
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:39] Lulu**
I'm the virtual fallen
angel idol, Ayamaki Lulu.
**[16:42] Lulu**
My favorite food is apple pie.
**[16:45] Lulu**
My least favorite is basically
all fresh vegetables.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[16:53] Hime & Hina**
In the name of the Girly Girl Empire!
**[16:55] Kerin**
Blast 'em!
**[16:56] Elu**
Hold it right there!
**[16:57] Everybody**
That voice...
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[17:02] Kerin**
Elu-san?!
**[17:03] Hina**
We finally meet!
**[17:04] Hina**
The legendary, beautiful god elf!
**[17:06] Hina**
Eru-san's here!
**[17:11] Hime**
What was that?! Why?
**[17:13] Kerin**
What did you two just do?
**[17:15] Hime**
I didn't do anything!
**[17:16] Hina**
Wait, was it me?
**[17:18] Hime**
What just happened?
**[17:19] Hime**
Try remembering and doing it again!
**[17:22] Hina**
The legendary, beautiful god elf!
**[17:26] Hime**
Nothing's happening.
**[17:27] Hime**
It seemed like lightning magic before.
**[17:29] Hina**
True, it looked kind of like the
light of El Thunder, didn't it?
**[17:35] Hime**
I've got it!
**[17:36] Hime**
"Elu-san's here," is what you thought
**[17:37] Hime**
and "Elu-san's here," is what you said,
**[17:39] Hime**
but it sounded like
"El Thunder" for some reason!
**[17:42] Kerin**
Why only me?!
**[17:44] Hina**
Oh, sorry!
**[17:45] Hina**
Hime, cut that out! You can't say El Thunder!
**[17:50] Kerin**
I'm not a lightning rod, damn it!
**[17:53] Hime**
Wow, this is really easy to do!
**[17:55] Hime**
El Thunder!
**[17:57] Kerin**
Please stop!
**[17:59] Hina**
Stop it! Kerin's life points
dropped to 0 a long time ago!
**[18:02] Kerin**
After three hard months, I was
finally able to meet Elu-san.
**[18:07] Kerin**
So why am I being fried with
lightning like this?
**[18:10] Hime**
I didn't mean anything by it. My bad, my bad!
**[18:13] Kerin**
But the lightning has cracked the statue.
**[18:18] Elu**
Hi everybody, and good elfning!
**[18:21] Elu**
I'm here from the land of elves,
the high-minded elven beauty, Elu!
**[18:27] Kerin**
The real Elu-san's here!
**[18:35] Hime**
Huh, what happened to Kerin?
**[18:37] Hina**
He went somewhere...
**[18:38] Elu**
Was someone else here?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:53] Uma**
I really hope you can hear
me out today, Sister.
**[18:55] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:57] Uma**
Well there's—
**[18:57] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:03] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:05] Sora**
I keep forgetting to lock
the door when I go out.
**[19:07] Sora**
How can I stop being so forgetful?
**[19:10] Sister**
It sounds like you're
just not cautious enough.
**[19:12] Sora**
Yeah...
**[19:12] Sister**
I understand. I know what
you can do to solve this.
**[19:16] Sora**
Really?!
**[19:17] Sister**
Change your phone's lock
screen to the keyhole.
**[19:20] Sora**
What do you mean?
**[19:21] Sister**
When you're on your way out,
you'll likely give it a casual glance.
**[19:23] Sister**
But if your lock screen is the keyhole,
if you've forgotten, it'll remind you.
**[19:29] Sora**
I get it! When I get home, I better
take a picture of the lock!
**[19:36] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[19:38] Uma**
Sora-Sora! You dropped your key!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:44] Peanuts**
I wanna be popular!
**[19:46] Peanuts**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[19:50] Hinata**
'Kay, we've got a letter here.
**[19:52] Hinata**
From pen name "King of Kings."
**[19:55] Everybody**
Thanks for writing!
**[19:57] Hinata**
"I have a question for you all."
**[19:59] Hinata**
"If you were the kings of a country,
what kind of nation would you build?"
**[20:05] Hinata**
He asks.
**[20:05] Hina**
Good question!
***SIGN*** If you were king,
what would your
kingdom be like?
**[20:07] Akari**
If I was royalty, I'd want to make
a law where wherever I went out,
**[20:13] Akari**
I'd be nude!
**[20:17] Mito**
Please stop making me want things!
**[20:19] Shiro**
Oh, me! Me, me, me, me!
**[20:20] Hinata**
Go ahead, Siro-chan.
**[20:21] Shiro**
If I was an awesome king, I'd make it
so that men could wear skirts, too.
**[20:29] Hime**
I like the sound of that!
**[20:29] Akari**
I think they do that in England!
**[20:31] Hina**
If I was queen, let's see...
**[20:34] Hina**
I'd order anime adaptations
for all my favorite manga!
**[20:37] Hime**
Wow! That'd be crazy!
**[20:39] Hina**
By my command!
**[20:39] Hikari**
That's awesome! I love it!
**[20:41] Mito**
Silence, all of you.
**[20:43] Mito**
Show some royal dignity.
**[20:45] Hina**
Lower your heads, all of you!
**[20:47] Mito**
Let's see...
**[20:48] Mito**
I think I'd make everyone
carry around 50 kg weights,
**[20:51] ---**
form a line, and then wander the desert,
**[20:54] Mito**
with only the survivors being able to return
to society, so that it would be more fit.
**[20:57] Hime**
That's so scary!
**[20:59] Shiro**
Like some kind of battle royal?
**[21:00] Akari**
That's really crazy!
**[21:01] Mito**
Something along those lines.
**[21:03] Hinata**
Okay, I'll wrap things up!
**[21:05] Everybody**
Yeah!
**[21:06] Hinata**
I hereby declare that that
is all for this week.
**[21:09] Shiro**
Yeah!
**[21:09] Hinata**
So, until next time,
**[21:12] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Kitakami Futaba
***SIGN*** Yamato Iori
**[22:52] Futaba**
Goodtaba evening, Kitakami Futaba here.
**[22:55] Iori**
Good morning, Yamato Iori here.
**[22:57] Futaba**
They said we could say whatever we
want during the next episode preview,
**[23:00] ---**
so what should we talk about?
**[23:02] Iori**
How about you show off your tongue
twister skill, Futaba-chan?
**[23:06] Futaba**
Sounds good! Give me one, come on!
**[23:08] Iori**
Okay, how about, "She sells
sea shells by the she—"
**[23:12] Iori**
Aw, I messed up.
**[23:14] Futaba**
No you didn't!
**[23:15] Iori**
I didn't?!
***SIGN*** Next Time
"I'm Salty"
***SIGN*** Next time is "I'm Salty."
**[23:19] Futaba**
Until next week—
**[23:20] Both**
Virtual-san is looking!
# E7 - I'm Salty
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRVD7J05R/im-salty)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Peanut**
They say those dark bits on a
banana are called "sugar spots."
**[00:05] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey! So where are
your sugar spots, Peanut?
**[00:08] Peanut**
Peanuts are salty! You horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:12] Hinata**
Hello and good evening everyone.
**[00:15] Everybody**
Good evening!
**[00:18] Hinata**
It seems *Virtual-san - Looking*
is getting good reviews.
**[00:20] Everyone**
That's nice!
**[00:22] Hinata**
And apparently there's an off-season
typhoon headed our way.
**[00:25] Everyone**
That's nice!
**[00:27] Hinata**
Nah, that's not happening!
**[00:29] Hinata**
Anyway, Akari-chan, did you cut your hair?
**[00:31] Akari**
Yeah!
**[00:33] Hinata**
And I heard that the opening song
is going to change this week?
**[00:35] Shiro**
Yep! The six of us are going
to be singing the new one.
**[00:39] Hime**
Which means you're going to be singing, too.
**[00:41] Hinata**
Really? What kind of song is it?
**[00:44] Shiro**
It's a cute, but rousing kind of song.
**[00:47] Akari**
It puts you in a sexy mood.
**[00:50] Hime**
It's a song that makes you
wanna do the Comăneci!
**[00:52] Hina**
It's the kind of wonderfully sleepy song
that you want to stick under your pillow.
**[00:55] Mito**
It's a song where you just
start to want to rap.
**[00:57] Hinata**
Everyone seems to have
a different take on it.
**[01:00] Hinata**
Well, to all our viewers, let us
know what you think at #virtualsan.
**[01:06] Hinata**
Let's get to it, here is...
**[01:09] Everyone**
"I Need More Love"!
**[02:57] Hime & Hina**
Virtual-san is...
**[02:58] Hime & Hina**
Looking!
**[03:06] Robo**
Wh-What is this?!
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:08] Mob A**
So... you're saying that when you
woke up, you had become a robot?
**[03:16] Robo**
Yeah.
**[03:18] Mob A**
And that yesterday, you were
totally normal, like me.
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:21] Robo**
Yeah.
**[03:22] Mob B**
Turning into a robot overnight
seems kind of impossible.
***SIGN*** Mob B
**[03:26] Robo**
Yeah, I know!
**[03:29] Both**
So why...?
**[03:30] Mob A**
The only possible reason I can think of...
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:32] Mob A**
is them!
**[03:34] Robo**
Ah...
**[03:35] Hime**
Hey! Where are we?
**[03:37] Hina**
Everybody seems to have the same face.
**[03:40] Mito**
Are they actually even people?
**[03:41] Hinata**
Man...
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** After-School V Time
**[03:52] Akari**
What nice weather!
**[03:54] Akari**
Man, I'm bored.
**[03:57] Akari**
So bored!
**[03:58] Hina**
Right?
**[03:58] Mito**
Really? I think that having a bit of down
time like this serves its own purpose.
**[04:03] Akari**
If I says I'm bored then I'm bored!
**[04:05] Akari**
Hina-chan, if you don't say something,
I'm gonna stare at you until you do!
**[04:11] Hina**
Then, I'll stare back! Stare!
**[04:16] Akari**
Class Prez, I'm not bored anymore!
**[04:19] Mito**
Okay, okay.
**[04:20] Mito**
How about this, then?
**[04:22] Mito**
Why don't we brainstorm ideas for things we
can do and then call them out, one by one.
**[04:26] Hina**
I'm not sure I can think of anything, though.
**[04:29] Mito**
We could pretend that the strings
for a ceiling lamp are a speed bag,
**[04:31] Mito**
or use the reverberation from a fan to talk
like aliens. Granted, those are a bit cliché.
**[04:34] Hina**
I've definitely heard of them.
**[04:36] ---**
And I dunno if either is
quite right for the moment.
**[04:38] Akari**
Try it.
**[04:39] Mito**
What, m-me?
**[04:40] Akari**
I'll do the buzzing thing that fans do, okay?
**[04:43] Mito**
All right.
**[04:44] Akari**
Vrrrm... vrrrm... vrrm...
**[04:44] Mito**
Hello! Mirai Akari here!
**[04:48] Mito**
What do you think? Sounds like you, huh?
**[04:51] Mito**
Hina-chan, you should try, too. Do me.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Factory Chief Nanoko
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[05:00] Nanoko**
Factory Chief Nanoko here!
**[05:02] Nanoko**
Let's enjoy working together
at a legitimate business,
**[05:05] Nanoko**
where we mass-produce bunnies.
**[05:13] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[05:17] Grandma**
Nashi no tsubute.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Nashi no tsubute
**[05:20] Banner**
That's the phrase.
**[05:22] Banner**
It comes from how sometimes, you never
receive a reply to correspondence.
**[05:25] Banner**
Like how you can toss a pebble,
and it won't ever come back to you.
**[05:30] Grandma**
In the old days, we used to only
have phones at home, after all.
**[05:33] Grandma**
So if you had any plans or sensitive
matters to discuss with friends,
**[05:37] ---**
you couldn't do it on the phone,
thanks to your family's prying eyes.
**[05:40] Grandma**
And if your friends ever moved far away,
**[05:43] ---**
you could generally expect
to never hear from them again.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:46] Grandma**
To put it in terms of the
modern smartphone ecosystem,
**[05:49] ---**
it'd be like LINE messages
that are never read,
**[05:52] ---**
or tweets that never
receive replies or likes.
**[05:56] Grandma**
Those would be nashi no tsubute.
**[05:58] Grandma**
Incidentally, I, Kobayashi Sachiko,
have an official Twitter as well!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:03] Grandma**
@Sachiko_5884.
**[06:08] Grandma**
The 5884 can be read as
"KO BA YA SHI," you see.
**[06:12] Grandma**
Also, make sure to tweet with
#virtualgrandmother and let me know
**[06:16] ---**
what you think of the show!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:18] Grandma**
I'll be waiting to hear from you.
**[06:22] Grandma**
Although I won't be replying all that much,
**[06:24] ---**
so that too, will be like nashi no tsubute!
**[06:30] Grandma**
But I will be reading them, okay?
**[06:31] ---**
I'll be self-searching,
and I might end up liking them.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[06:40] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[06:46] Gori**
Virtual-san is looking. Hello!
**[06:52] Aoi**
Gori-chan, let's play Red Light, Green Light!
**[06:56] Gori**
Hello!
**[06:57] Aoi**
Green light...
**[06:59] Aoi**
Red light!
**[07:01] Aoi**
Huh?
**[07:02] Peanut**
It's me, Peanut!
**[07:04] Aoi**
Where'd Gori-chan go?!
**[07:06] Peanut**
I ate him!
**[07:08] Gori**
Hello!
**[07:10] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:12] Gori**
Hi!
**[07:15] Aoi**
Green light...
**[07:17] Aoi**
Red light!
**[07:18] Aoi**
Huh?
**[07:19] Peanut**
It's me, Peanut!
**[07:21] Aoi**
Where's Gori-chan?
**[07:23] Peanut**
Here he is!
**[07:25] Gori**
Hello!
**[07:26] Call**
Fuji Aoi! Hello.
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:31] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
***SIGN*** Whoa, whoa, whoa... hello there.
**[07:43] Akari**
What is it, Hime-chan?
**[07:45] Hime**
Akari-chan, we've got really big trouble!
**[07:48] Mirai**
Let's see here.
**[07:50] Hime**
Someone with the pen name
"Mimi-chan" is worried!
**[07:52] Hime**
Stop clonking around and here!
Read this, would you? Go on!
**[07:54] Akari**
Sorry about that. Let's see,
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello!
**[07:56] Hime**
Hello.
**[07:56] Akari**
Hello.
**[07:57] Hime**
Hello.
**[07:58] Akari**
"Whenever I'm using my PC and try
to put something in the USB port,
**[08:01] ---**
I always end up the wrong way around."
**[08:03] Akari**
"How can I stop doing this?"
**[08:05] Hime**
Oh, I totally do that all the time!
***SIGN*** Problem: Inserting USB connectors backwards
**[08:07] Akari**
I get the feeling!
**[08:07] Hime**
That happens to everybody.
**[08:08] Akari**
Yep. It's a pretty common,
low-key frustration.
**[08:10] Hime**
I totally get it!
**[08:12] Akari**
But how to fix it? Hmm...
**[08:15] Hime**
Hey, Mirai-san?
**[08:17] Hime**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[08:19] Yami**
The problem is you rely on USB too much.
**[08:21] ---**
Just memorize the stuff you need!
**[08:23] Hikari**
But that's so much less efficient!
**[08:26] Hikari**
I'd probably just check the connector
every time, before inserting it.
**[08:29] Yami**
That's way too much work!
**[08:32] Yami**
The real problem is getting dependent
on technological advances!
**[08:35] Yami**
It wasn't that long ago that
USB tech didn't even exist!
**[08:39] Hikari**
You've got a point, but...
**[08:42] Hikari**
Oh, Akari! Take it from here!
**[08:45] Hime**
Hello! Earth to Mirai-san?
**[08:50] Akari**
Sorry, I'm back now.
**[08:52] Hime**
Oh, welcome home.
**[08:52] Akari**
Okay!
**[08:55] Akari**
Pen name Mimi-chan!
**[08:57] Akari**
Here's the bottom line!
**[09:00] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
**[09:04] Akari**
You need your own company!
**[09:07] Hime**
A c-company?!
**[09:08] Akari**
Yep! Mimi-chan is being troubled by something
as mundane as USB accessories, right?
**[09:13] Akari**
That's a pretty common
problem that everyone has!
**[09:16] Hime**
Yeah, that's true.
**[09:17] Akari**
Which means it's a business opportunity!
**[09:20] Akari**
Mimi-chan will practice connecting
USB stuff until she masters it!
**[09:24] Akari**
And then she'll become a USB insertion
pro with perfect accuracy!
**[09:27] Hime**
That's professional?! Really?!
**[09:28] Akari**
Yep.
**[09:29] Akari**
Then she start a company, and visit
other people with the same problem,
**[09:34] Akari**
and—bang, bang, bang—
jam those USB connections in!
**[09:36] Akari**
Mimi-chan will be creating
an all-new kind of business!
**[09:39] Hime**
That's awesome and sounds super cool!
**[09:42] Akari**
At the same time she can work
on training some new hires,
***SIGN*** USB Incorporated
**[09:44] ---**
and found an entire workforce
of genius USB experts!
**[09:46] Akari**
The business will grow with leaps and bounds,
and she'll get super rich!
**[09:49] Hime**
That's awesome! Bubble-style!
**[09:51] Akari**
And then Mimi-chan becomes super rich
and retires to a tropical island. Aloha!
**[09:54] Akari**
And there she lived a life never having to
worry about USB ports ever again. The end!
**[10:00] Hime**
I love it! What a great story!
**[10:02] Akari**
Isn't it, though?
**[10:04] Hime**
Yeah!
**[10:05] Akari**
You commit to meeting the needs
of an unfulfilled market segment.
**[10:07] Akari**
That's the iron rule of business!
**[10:09] Hime**
USB Dream!
**[10:11] Akari**
Yay!
**[10:13] Hime**
Dream catching Yay!
Playing the lotto! Bang, bang, bang!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[10:24] Hinata**
Where is that save point?!
**[10:33] Hinata**
If this keeps up...
**[10:35] ---**
I'll be in trouble.
**[10:38] Hinata**
The feeling of this bridge...
**[10:39] Hinata**
There's definitely a boss
battle on the other side!
**[10:41] Hinata**
Does that mean this is...
**[10:43] ---**
the last dungeon?!
**[10:45] Hinata**
Would it be a good idea to move onto
the boss battle without saving?
**[10:49] Hinata**
I'm not particularly good at the bullet
hell segments, so I tend to do poorly
**[10:51] ---**
on my first try with bosses.
**[10:53] Hinata**
You have to move your heart around...
**[10:55] Hinata**
Like this! And that! There!
**[10:57] Hinata**
I can do this!
**[10:59] Hinata**
I've got a slice of butterscotch-cinnamon pie,
along with other healing items...
**[11:04] Hinata**
I can do this!
**[11:06] Hinata**
Time to take this boss on!
**[11:14] Hinata**
I'm filled with determination
to fight this boss!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:21] Hinata**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[11:31] Shiro**
Oh, Pino-chan! Welcome!
**[11:35] Pino**
I am ever so fed up!
**[11:38] Pino**
Can I get some trivia about tai, please?
***SIGN*** Tai (Red Sea Bream)
**[11:46] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[11:47] Shiro**
Y'know, Japan is really the only
country to treat red sea bream as the
**[11:51] ---**
king of fish and a gourmet ingredient.
**[11:56] Pino**
I'm not quite full yet.
**[11:59] ---**
I could go for some more.
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:06] Shiro**
Well there's also Thai...
**[12:07] Shiro**
As in the country that is very popular
with Japanese tourists, Thailand.
***SIGN*** Bangkok
**[12:11] Shiro**
And though it's the capitol of Thailand,
**[12:13] ---**
did you know that Bangkok
isn't its official name?
**[12:16] Shiro**
Officially it's...
**[12:18] Shiro**
Krungthepmahanakhon Amonrattanakosin
Mahintharayutthaya
**[12:23] ---**
Mahadilokphop Noppharatratchathaniburirom
Udomratchaniwetmahasathan
**[12:28] ---**
Amonphimanawatansathit
Sakkathattiyawitsanukamprasit!
***SIGN*** Trivia Diner
**[12:35] Pino**
Wow, really?
**[12:37] Pino**
Your trivia really is always
so handy, Siro-oneechan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Nike
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[12:47] Nike**
Hiya! Nike here!
**[12:50] Nike**
Nice to meet you all.
**[12:53] Nike**
My favorite food is ramen combos.
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:03] Mito**
Now, then, I caught him earlier,
and he should be waking up any time now.
***SIGN*** Kenmochi Toya appeared!
**[13:11] Toya**
Class Prez! Why am I the
only one locked up here?!
**[13:14] Toya**
Everyone else said you just
asked them to appear normally!
**[13:16] Toya**
What did I do to earn this treatment?!
**[13:18] Mito**
Silence!
**[13:19] Mito**
You're joining me for the ultimate "Would
you rather" committee today, Kenmochi-san.
**[13:22] Mito**
Here's our subject!
**[13:24] Mito**
Which would you prefer?
**[13:26] Mito**
A) Being randomly shocked to the
point of mild pain once a day, or...
**[13:29] Mito**
B) To have your socks get
slightly soggy every day.
**[13:31] Toya**
Uh, I'd rather neither...
**[13:32] Toya**
I guess maybe B, having your
socks get soggy every day.
**[13:37] Mito**
That's what you'd prefer?
**[13:38] Toya**
I think so.
**[13:39] Toya**
I mean, if you get shocked once a day,
**[13:41] ---**
it'd be a real problem depending
on when it happens, right?
**[13:43] Mito**
What do you mean exactly?
**[13:45] Toya**
If you got shocked while using the bathroom,
you could end up splashing everywhere.
**[13:49] Mito**
I honestly would rather you
not have elaborated there.
**[13:53] Mito**
But I see what you mean.
**[13:55] Mito**
Like, say you're proposing.
**[13:57] Mito**
It could end up like, "I've always *augh*,"
which would definitely put a damper on things.
**[14:00] Toya**
Yes, exactly. That's what I'm thinking.
**[14:02] Mito**
That's a good point.
**[14:03] Mito**
But wouldn't it made your feet stink?
If your socks were a bit damp all the time.
**[14:07] Toya**
I guess they would.
**[14:07] Mito**
Right, and that would be terrible.
**[14:08] Toya**
But if it got to be bad, you could
always just take your socks off.
**[14:13] Mito**
Okay, then, Kenmochi-san,
take your socks off.
**[14:16] Mito**
Go ahead.
**[14:17] Toya**
Huh. Wha... My shoes... They won't come off.
**[14:20] Mito**
Isn't that the strangest thing?
**[14:22] Mito**
I can't imagine why!
**[14:23] Mito**
I wonder how much it would cost
to be able to take them off?
**[14:25] Mito**
Oh, look at the time! Okay, let's settle it.
**[14:28] Mito**
The answer is A). Receiving a random,
mildly painful shock once a day is preferable!
**[14:35] Toya**
I don't see the point of having
me on this segment!
**[14:37] Mito**
Silence!
**[14:38] Mito**
If you want to electrify
everyone else as a VTuber,
**[14:40] ---**
you had better be prepared
to be electrified yourself!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[14:47] Chaco**
Good evening everybody!
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Batsuko
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[14:50] Chaco**
I'm Batsuko!
**[14:52] Chaco**
Here we go! Ready, and...
**[14:54] Chaco**
Batsuko pose!
**[15:03] Rin**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:07] Unity**
Unity-chan...
**[15:12] Unity**
Oh, poor Cinderella.
**[15:15] Unity**
I will make it so you are
fit to go to the ball!
**[15:19] Unity**
There!
**[15:21] Unity**
Now, your beauty will be unleashed!
**[15:25] Gori**
Hello!
**[15:28] Gori**
Is this where we're filming today?
**[15:30] Unity**
Y-You wanna eat some curry croquettes?
**[15:32] Gori**
I appreciate it.
**[15:34] Unity**
He ate it.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[15:39] Tatsumi**
This message goes out to the entire world.
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Fukuhara Tatsumi
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[15:41] Tatsumi**
My name is Fukuhara Tatsumi,
**[15:43] Tatsumi**
and I am a revolutionary
of the virtual world!
**[15:45] ---**
I am here to tell you all only one thing:
**[15:47] ---**
Put me in the anime!
**[15:49] ---**
That is all.
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[15:59] Elu**
Was someone else here?
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:04] Kerin**
*What happened to me?*
**[16:06] Kerin**
* It looks like I've turned into*
* drifting particles of light.*
**[16:10] Kerin**
*I can't maintain my form.*
**[16:12] Kerin**
* And after I was finally*
* about to meet Elu-san...*
**[16:15] Hime**
Hey, Kerin! Where are you?
**[16:18] Hina**
Kerin!
**[16:19] Elu**
Hey, what is that white thing?
**[16:22] Hime**
Could it be?
**[16:24] Kerin**
*She's calling for me...*
**[16:25] Kerin**
*Elu-san is calling me!*
**[16:29] Hime**
Kerin's particles are shining!
**[16:31] Hime**
Elu-chan! Reach out and grab that light!
**[16:33] Elu**
Like this? Come on back!
**[16:38] Kerin**
I did it! I'm back!
**[16:41] Kerin**
Elu-san! Thank you so much!
**[16:43] Kerin**
Wait, where did Elu-san go?
**[16:46] Elu**
I-I'm over here.
**[16:48] Hina**
She's behind you, Kerin.
**[16:49] Kerin**
Unbelievable!
**[16:50] Kerin**
I finally regain physical form, but I
can't actually see Elu-san behind me?!
**[16:54] Hime**
Oh, it's because his layer is on top of hers!
**[16:56] Kerin**
I get it.
**[16:57] Kerin**
So it's actually "Kerin's Layer."
**[16:59] Hina**
This whole sketch has been a pun.
**[17:01] Elu**
Kerin-san, I'm Elu!
**[17:04] Kerin**
Elu-san! It's nice to meet you.
I'm Yamikumo Kerin, the dark elf!
**[17:09] Kerin**
Why?! Why can't I see Elu-san's face?!
**[17:12] Hime**
She's super cute!
**[17:14] Hina**
And super pretty!
**[17:16] Kerin**
Damn it! Quit hogging all the Elu-san!
**[17:20] Elu**
Kerin-san seems like a pleasant fellow!
**[17:22] Kerin**
This is such a perfect chance!
**[17:24] Kerin**
But I can't even see her!
**[17:26] Kerin**
If this forest can't help me...
It might as well burn!
**[17:31] Hina**
Don't tell me...
**[17:32] Kerin**
Ultimate Mega-Magic, Buchiflare!
**[17:35] Kerin**
I'm gonna blow it all up!
**[17:36] Hina**
Hime, you know what to do?
**[17:38] Hime**
Heck yeah!
**[17:39] Himehina**
In thy great name, we pledge
ourselves to darkness!
**[17:44] Himehina**
Let all the layers who stand
in our way be destroyed
**[17:47] Himehina**
by the power that we posses.
**[17:48] Himehina**
Kerin Slayer!
**[17:52] Kerin**
Huh? Huh? What the...?
**[17:55] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[17:56] Elu**
That's me!
**[17:58] Kerin**
I'm moved!
**[17:59] Kerin**
It's Elu-san, in the flesh!
**[18:01] Hime**
Sorry to interrupt your moment, but can
you do something about the missiles?
**[18:06] Kerin**
That's right!
**[18:07] Kerin**
At this rate, Elu-san and the
forest will be destroyed!
**[18:09] Hina**
We're here too!
**[18:11] Elu**
My forest is going to burn again.
**[18:13] Kerin**
I won't let that happen!
**[18:15] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[18:16] Hime & Hina**
Kerin!
**[18:23] Hime**
Elu-san... He sacrificed
himself to protect us!
**[18:31] Hina**
Elu-chan, putting that aside,
I'm feeling kind of thirsty.
**[18:34] Hime**
Oh, yeah, me too.
**[18:35] Hime**
You wanna go grab some banana shakes?
**[18:38] Hime**
We know a great place!
**[18:40] Hina**
Come on!
**[18:40] Elu**
Let's go!
**[18:42] Hina**
Y'know, bananas are vegetables!
**[18:43] Kerin**
Elu-san!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:55] Uma**
Sister, please, hear me out, Sister!
**[18:58] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:59] Uma**
The other day, I—
**[18:59] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:05] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:06] Sora**
I found a mini rice porridge at
the convenient store, so I bought it,
**[19:10] ---**
but when I tried to eat it at home,
it said it was for dogs.
**[19:13] Sora**
What a waste.
**[19:15] Sister**
Couldn't you have returned it?
**[19:17] Sora**
I already opened it before I noticed.
**[19:19] Sister**
I see.
**[19:21] Sister**
I suppose you'll have to eat it, then.
**[19:23] Sora**
Eat it?! But it's for dogs!
**[19:25] Sister**
Did you notice anything when you
looked at the back of the package?
**[19:29] Sora**
The back...? Wow,
it's really low in calories!
**[19:33] Sister**
Indeed.
**[19:34] Sister**
Maybe this is a stroke of fate,
**[19:36] ---**
and you could start a diet fad where
you eat rice porridge for dogs.
**[19:39] Sora**
But if it doesn't taste good...
**[19:42] Sister**
You could always write about
the experience in a book,
**[19:44] ---**
and if it's successful, then it will
be "delicious" in a different sense.
**[19:48] Sora**
I see!
**[19:49] Sora**
Then I'm gonna head to the convenience store
and buy a bunch of rice porridge for dogs!
**[19:54] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[19:57] Uma**
Virtual-kun wants to eat
porridge, too! Woof woof!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:05] Sister**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[20:09] Mito**
All right, we've got a letter here.
**[20:11] Mito**
It's from someone with the pen name "Upload."
**[20:13] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:16] Mito**
"You all upload a lot of videos yourselves,
but do you watch anyone else's videos?"
**[20:21] Mito**
"If there are any that made an impression,
please tell us about them."
**[20:24] Mito**
Well, everyone, do you
watch anyone else's videos?
**[20:28] Everyone**
Yeah!
**[20:29] Hime**
I watch lots!
**[20:30] Mito**
I see, then Hime-san,
which videos do you watch?
**[20:34] Hime**
Let's see. I watch ones where people sing...
**[20:37] Mito**
Ah, I see.
**[20:38] Hime**
Also, let's see, I also like short
sketches that are kinda zippy,
**[20:42] Hime**
the kind where you can watch a whole
bunch and scratch the right kind of itch.
**[20:47] Mito**
That sounds nice. Faster-paced
videos are great for comedy.
**[20:51] Hime**
Exactly! You can watch a ton like that.
**[20:53] Mito**
I think that from this anime, the Game Club
and Kerin-san fit that kind of description.
**[20:58] Akari**
Kerin-kun!
**[21:00] Akari**
Yeah, they've got a style
that's hard to match!
**[21:02] Mito**
True enough.
**[21:03] Hinata**
It's really creative.
**[21:05] Akari**
But y'know, one day, I'd like
to blow my house up too.
**[21:08] Hime**
Is that your dream?
**[21:09] Akari**
It totally is!
**[21:10] Shiro**
I can do it for you, if you'd like.
**[21:13] Akari**
Really? How about the day after tomorrow?
**[21:15] Hime**
It's a date!
**[21:17] Hina**
I want to see that!
**[21:20] Mito**
Okay, well, we're out of time!
**[21:23] Hime**
That was fast!
**[21:25] Hinata**
I want more!
**[21:25] Mito**
That's it for this week, so until next week!
**[21:29] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:11] Yoko**
Dunnananan! Yahoo, Akabane Yoko here!
***SIGN*** Akabane Yoko
**[23:14] Yoko**
It's the time of year
for good hot pot dishes.
**[23:16] Yoko**
Motsunabe, Korean hot pot, tonyu nabe...
They're all good, but I recommend kaki nabe.
**[23:21] Yoko**
Getting under the kotatsu and eating some kaki
nabe is a great way to warm up, you know?
**[23:25] Yoko**
You can get stomachaches sometimes, though.
**[23:27] Yoko**
Just be sure not to put anything
weird in the pot, okay?
**[23:30] Yoko**
Next time is "White Tears."
***SIGN*** Next Time
White Tears
**[23:32] Yoko**
Virtual-san will be looking next week, too!
# E8 - White Tears
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR79D02K6/white-tears)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Peanut**
They say Fukuzawa Yukichi was the first
guy to do college-style lectures in Japan.
**[00:05] Uma**
Okay, lecture me, Peanut-kun!
Three, two, one, go!
**[00:08] Peanut**
Like I'm gonna bother when you'll
just forget it, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey, hey!
**[00:13] Hina**
Okay, are you ready?
**[00:15] Hina**
"Virtual-san is looking."
**[00:18] Shiro**
Looking...
**[00:20] Shiro**
*Looking For Love*, that musical!
*Looking for Love*...
**[00:25] Hime**
Oh, love...
**[00:27] Hime**
*Love or Money*!
**[00:29] Hime**
I think that's one!
**[00:31] Hime**
The movie *Love or Money*!
**[00:33] Mito**
Money... Money...
**[00:35] Mito**
*Money Train*? The movie.
**[00:40] Akari**
Train, huh? Movies that start with train...
**[00:43] Akari**
*How to Train Your Dragon*?
**[00:45] Akari**
Wait, no... *Training Day*! Yeah.
**[00:51] Hinata**
Day... Day... Day...
**[00:55] Hinata**
Day of the...?
**[01:03] Hinata**
*Day of the Dead* is a movie.
**[01:06] Hinata**
*Deadpool*!
**[01:14] Mito**
Ready, and..
**[01:16] Everybody**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:04] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:07] Mob A**
The only possible reason I can think of...
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 2
**[03:09] Mob A**
is them!
**[03:15] Hime**
Hey! Where are we?
**[03:17] Hina**
Everybody seems to have the same face...
**[03:19] Mito**
Are they actually even people?
**[03:21] Hinata**
Man, I am so tired.
**[03:24] Mob B**
That's...
***SIGN*** Mob B
**[03:25] Mob A**
Mirai Akari, Tanaka Hime, Suzuki Hina...
***SIGN*** Mob A
***SIGN*** Mob B
**[03:29] Mob B**
Tsukino Mito, Nekomiya Hinata, and...
**[03:33] Robo**
Cyber Girl... Siro.
**[03:37] Robo**
What are they doing here?!
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[03:40] Mob A**
I have no idea.
**[03:41] Mob A**
But ever since that TV show started airing,
they sometimes appear like this.
**[03:46] Robo**
That TV show...
**[03:49] Robo**
You people!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[03:54] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
***SIGN*** Utsureba kawaru, yo no narai.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Utsureba kawaru,
yo no narai
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:01] Grandma**
That's the phrase.
**[04:04] Grandma**
It refers to how the world
changes as time moves on.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:09] Grandma**
From the Showa to Heisei eras, one thing that
changed a lot is the electric appliance.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:14] Grandma**
We've moved from black and white
to color television,
**[04:17] Grandma**
air conditioning has made things
a lot more pleasant indoors,
**[04:22] Grandma**
and laundry machines have added
more and more features over time,
**[04:25] ---**
making that old chore so much simpler.
**[04:28] Grandma**
Now it's hard to imagine life
without something like a refrigerator.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:32] Grandma**
My family actually ran a butcher shop.
**[04:36] Grandma**
That meant having a fridge with a freezer,
which was revolutionary at the time.
**[04:41] Grandma**
See, having a freezer means you can
preserve meat for a lot longer,
**[04:46] ---**
which made for much better
turnaround for our product.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:50] ---**
That was quite remarkable, let me tell you.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[04:54] Grandma**
Incidentally, I think that being the child
of a butcher shop meant that I was the first
**[04:59] ---**
in my class to ever try sausage.
**[05:03] Grandma**
That's how long ago this was.
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:05] Grandma**
That said, I'm fairly sure I'm the
first person in my class who has gone
**[05:11] ---**
on to become virtual, as well!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:13] Grandma**
Virtual Grandmother!
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[05:24] Peanut**
The crunchiest virtual Youtuber, Peanut-kun!
**[05:29] Peanut**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[05:37] Akari**
I really thought we were toast!
**[05:39] Akari**
It's so good to be alive!
**[05:42] Mito**
That aside, space certainly
is mysterious, isn't it?
**[05:44] Hime**
Space?
**[05:45] Mito**
Yes.
**[05:46] Mito**
When you think about all the mysteries
humanity has yet to solve out there,
**[05:49] ---**
doesn't it just thrill you?
**[05:50] Hinata**
Oh, I get you!
**[05:52] Hinata**
Becoming a space pirate and going
on an adventure sounds good to me.
**[05:55] Shiro**
I want to boldly go where
no man has gone before!
**[06:04] Hinata**
That scared me... huh?!
**[06:05] Hinata**
Is it just me or did something happen outside?
**[06:08] Shiro**
Space?!
**[06:10] Hinata**
Look, everybody! Something's headed our way!
**[06:14] Mito**
Is it some kind of cosmic mystery?!
**[06:15] Peanuts**
Here I come!
**[06:18] Everybody**
You again?!
**[06:20] Hime**
Why are you coming straight at us?!
**[06:23] Akari**
Everybody! Let's come up with a plan, quick!
**[06:25] Akari**
Or he's going to get us again!
**[06:30] Hinata**
That laugh...
**[06:31] Hinata**
It's Meteoric Peanut-kun!
**[06:32] Shiro**
In that case, why don't
we try flattering him?
**[06:35] Shiro**
Peanut is always a pushover!
**[06:37] Akari**
Makes sense, so we just
have to complement him!
**[06:39] Shiro**
Take it away, then, Akari-chan!
**[06:40] Akari**
Seriously?!
**[06:41] Akari**
Uh, you're handsome, in a
lower mid-tier kind of way!
**[06:44] Hime**
And uh, I really want to wear
those cool underwear you have!
**[06:46] Hina**
Your hair's so stylish, too!
**[06:47] Hinata**
And you're so yellow! Yellow is good!
**[06:49] Mito**
Really, it's just so impressive how the,
uh, the color of your nipples is so vivid.
**[06:54] Shiro**
Hey, he's not stopping at all!
**[06:55] Shiro**
You want me to rip your damn
briefs off, you cocky nut?!
**[06:59] Mito**
N-Now I have to block up before
we get booted off the air!
**[07:01] Siro**
Tee-hee, that just slipped out!
**[07:03] Hinata**
We're done for!
**[07:07] Peanut**
Here I come!
**[07:11] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:13] Everybody**
Hello!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[07:17] Hinata**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[07:24] Aoi**
Gori-chan...
**[07:25] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:26] Aoi**
How you been?
**[07:27] Gori**
Having fun, I'd say.
**[07:28] Aoi**
And that's the problem!
**[07:29] Gori**
What brought this on?
**[07:30] Aoi**
There's nothing fun about the fact that
Fuji Aoi Park might end up closing!
**[07:34] Gori**
This park is actually a business?
**[07:36] Aoi**
That's right! How did you not notice?!
**[07:38] Gori**
I-I'm sorry.
**[07:40] Aoi**
That being the case, Gori-chan,
can I lay you off?
**[07:42] Gori**
I had a job here?!
**[07:45] Aoi**
I happened to get my hands on a
younger, cuter, sexier employee.
**[07:50] Gori**
You already hired my replacement?!
**[07:52] Pink**
Hello there, I'm a pink gorilla.
**[07:54] Gori**
My own sister?!
**[07:55] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:57] Gori**
Hello!
**[08:00] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[08:05] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[08:13] Akari**
What's wrong, Hime?
**[08:15] Hime**
Akari-chan! We've got really big trouble!
**[08:17] Akari**
And what is it this time?
**[08:19] Hime**
Someone with the pen name
"Takahashi-kun" is in trouble!
**[08:22] Hime**
Here, ready this and help them!
**[08:24] Hime**
Go!
**[08:25] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san."
**[08:27] Hime**
H'lo.
**[08:27] Akari**
Hello.
**[08:28] Akari**
"My boss at work always hits the enter
key as loudly as he possibly can."
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[08:33] Akari**
"It's so distracting,
I can't focus on my work!"
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[08:35] Akari**
"What should I do?"
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[08:37] Akari**
I see, I see.
***SIGN*** Problem: Boss hits enter really noisily
**[08:37] Hime**
It's textual harassment, huh?
**[08:40] Hime**
That's what it is.
**[08:41] Akari**
I know what they mean, though.
**[08:42] Akari**
Sometimes you get distracted when
you hear that really loud "clack"!
**[08:44] Hime**
It's always louder than you think, too.
**[08:45] Akari**
Yep. But y'know, it feels good to do.
**[08:48] Hime**
I don't know why, but it's
really exhilarating.
**[08:49] Mirai**
Crazily so!
**[08:51] Hime**
Clack! Finished!
**[08:53] Akari**
It really does gives you a
sense of finishing something.
**[08:56] Akari**
Maybe because it's so big?
The actual key on the keyboard, I mean.
**[08:58] Hime**
The enter key.
**[08:59] Akari**
Yeah, the enter key.
**[09:00] Akari**
But I can understand how
Takahashi-kun would, y'know?
**[09:03] Akari**
Want to ask his boss to stop
smashing that enter key,
**[09:06] Akari**
but considering it's his boss,
it's hard to bring up.
**[09:09] Hime**
Yep, yep, yep.
**[09:10] Akari**
What to do?
**[09:12] Hime**
Hey, Mirai-san?
**[09:15] ---**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:17] Hikari**
Everyone has their odd habits,
so I think you should just try to bear it.
**[09:22] Yami**
That's messed up!
**[09:23] Yami**
The other guy's at fault.
Might as well come out and say it!
**[09:26] Hikari**
But it's his boss.
**[09:29] Hikari**
It could have a bad affect
on their relationship.
**[09:32] Yami**
God, you're so old fashioned.
**[09:34] Yami**
Coddling the entrenched powers
that be like that is exactly what
**[09:36] ---**
breeds so much harassment.
**[09:39] Hikari**
I guess you have a point, but...
**[09:42] Yami**
I figure push comes to shove, you rip
the enter key off their keyboard.
**[09:47] Hikari**
Wouldn't that be a kind of harassment, too?
**[09:51] Hikari**
Akari, you make the final call!
**[09:54] Hime**
Hello? Earth to Mirai-san!
**[09:59] Akari**
Sorry!
**[10:00] Akari**
I'm finally back.
**[10:02] Hime**
Welcome home.
**[10:03] Akari**
Right!
**[10:05] Akari**
Now, pen name Takahashi-kun!
I'm gonna get to the bottom line!
**[10:09] Hime**
Is she going to get to it?
**[10:11] Hime**
Her bottom... line?
**[10:13] Akari**
You need to encourage your boss!
**[10:16] Hime**
Encourage them?
**[10:17] Hime**
Then is he giving up on this enter key stuff?
**[10:19] Akari**
Not exactly!
***SIGN*** Clack!
**[10:21] Akari**
First, you listen out for the
moment they smash that enter key.
**[10:25] Akari**
Then, right when they do it, you shout out!
**[10:29] Akari**
"Nice enter!"
***SIGN*** Nice enter!!
**[10:30] Hime**
I like it!
**[10:32] Akari**
The important thing is being consistent!
**[10:33] Akari**
Never miss any time that
they smash that enter key,
**[10:37] Akari**
and the second you do it's,
"Nice enter! The best in Japan!"
**[10:41] Akari**
"That's why they call you 'Mr. Enter'!'"
**[10:43] Hime**
That sounds like fun!
**[10:45] Akari**
By doing that, since it's just encouragement,
it won't be taken the wrong way.
**[10:49] Akari**
But wouldn't the boss get embarrassed by all
that fuss just from hitting the enter key?
**[10:53] Hime**
You've got a point!
**[10:54] Akari**
Right?!
**[10:55] Hime**
It'd be obvious!
**[10:55] Akari**
It would!
**[10:56] Hime**
It'd be obvious!
**[10:57] Akari**
Totally obvious!
**[10:58] Akari**
So, in order to make sure Takahashi-kun
doesn't cheer him on,
**[11:01] Akari**
his boss will start to
press the enter key gently!
**[11:04] Hime**
That's super awesome! You are so smart!
**[11:07] Akari**
That's what it takes to make it in society!
**[11:11] Hime**
Super Miracle Enter Key Man!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:21] Hinata**
Time to build, time to build!
**[11:29] Hinata**
What should I do?
**[11:31] Hinata**
If I use blocks to create a
new park in this vacant lot,
**[11:36] Hinata**
how exactly should I do it?
**[11:39] Hinata**
Like this!
**[11:45] Hinata**
Why, would you look at that?
**[11:47] Hinata**
Those scattered piles of sand are now laid
out as lovely as a rock garden in Kyoto!
**[11:54] Hinata**
The big pipes that conveyed nothing
**[11:57] ---**
but Gianism are now laid out like
the stage for a glamorous idol.
**[12:00] Hinata**
And the lumpy, dangerous ground is now flat.
**[12:04] Hinata**
A skillful hand has transformed his typical
empty lot into a soothing park space.
**[12:18] Hinata**
I hope people call me skillful some day!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[12:25] Mito**
Rise! Attention! Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:33] Shiro**
Oh, it's Tokino Sora-chan! Welcome!
**[12:37] Kaede**
Gosh, I am so fed up!
**[12:40] Miria**
Can I get some trivia about sushi, please?
**[12:43] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:50] Shiro**
Now, sushi...
***SIGN*** Sushi
***SIGN*** Sushi has a long history, and has been known to exist since the Nara period.
***SIGN*** The hand-formed style became popular in the Edo period,
**[13:02] ---**
when it was called Edomae sushi,
and sold in carts all over old Tokyo.
***SIGN*** When you think about how people from the time would casually stop by a cart
***SIGN*** to stand around eating sushi, you could even call it Edo period fast food!
***SIGN*** At the time, sushi tended to be as big as rice balls,
***SIGN*** Edo Period
***SIGN*** Modern Day
**[13:16] ---**
and since that made it hard
to eat with chopsticks,
***SIGN*** it was instead eaten by hand, which is a custom that continues to this day.
***SIGN*** Also, in sushi jargon, wasabi is called "namida" because if it's spicy enough,
**[13:26] ---**
it can bring you to tears (namida).
**[13:31] Miria**
Wow, I had no idea!
**[13:33] Miria**
Your trivia really is always
so handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Shirogumi-san
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[13:43] Shirogumi**
The time has come!
**[13:45] Shirogumi**
My name is "Watanabe Suzume."
**[13:48] Shirogumi**
Also known as Grisaille IV.
**[13:51] Shirogumi**
Let the depths of my sorcery
teach you true fear.
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:59] Mito**
I wonder if Kaede-chan has
been watching Kerin Slayer.
**[14:05] Kaede**
Burn down the dark elf's forest!
**[14:08] Mito**
You are so impressionable.
**[14:10] Kaede**
You think elves and dark elves
live in different forests?
**[14:13] Mito**
Elves aren't human anyway,
so who cares where they live?
**[14:16] Kaede**
You got a point there!
**[14:17] Mito**
Anyway, Kaede-chan, let's get on with the
ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[14:20] Kaede**
Right!
**[14:20] Mito**
Here is our subject for today!
**[14:23] Mito**
Which would you rather be?
**[14:24] Mito**
A) Immortal, but having
to take exams every year.
**[14:28] Mito**
B) Have five years to live, but be rich
enough that you can do whatever you want.
**[14:31] Kaede**
Oh, B for me, easy.
**[14:33] Mito**
Really?
**[14:34] Kaede**
Well if you know exactly what kind of time
you've got, you can spend all of it having fun.
**[14:38] Mito**
You'd die in five years!
Is that what you want?
**[14:40] Kaede**
Sure.
**[14:40] Mito**
Come on, quit sounding so suicidal!
**[14:42] Mito**
Don't give up! Live your life!
**[14:45] Kaede**
What about you, Mito-chan?
**[14:45] Mito**
I think I would live my immortal life,
even if every year was exams.
**[14:49] Kaede**
Why?!
**[14:50] Mito**
Well, all you really need to
do is fail every year, right?
**[14:52] Mito**
You could repeat the same
grade, like, 1,030 times.
**[14:54] Mito**
Wouldn't that be fine?
**[14:56] Higuchi**
That could be a Guinness World Record!
**[14:57] Mito**
That sounds good to me.
**[14:59] Kaede**
But you gotta keep living no matter
how badly hurt or sad you get, then.
**[15:03] Mito**
Kaede-chan, is life really just
injuries and sadness for you?
**[15:07] Kaede**
Well, I mean, isn't life mostly
just depressing stuff?
**[15:11] Mito**
To what degree?
**[15:13] Kaede**
Eighty percent...
**[15:13] Mito**
Eighty percent?! It's that bad?!
**[15:15] Kaede**
Well, I guess, to have a fun life,
**[15:17] Kaede**
you've gotta work hard from every day, right?
**[15:19] Mito**
Okay, stop trying to sound profound!
**[15:22] Mito**
This whole bit has me trying
to do that as the final line!
**[15:24] Kaede**
My bad!
**[15:26] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[15:27] Kaede**
Right.
**[15:27] Mito**
So here's the answer...
**[15:29] Mito**
A) Being immortal and every
year being an exam year!
**[15:34] Kaede**
That don't seem like it'd suck to you?
**[15:35] Mito**
Can you imagine the kind of subscriber
counts you'd rack up if you were immortal?!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[15:43] Kaede**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[15:44] Kaede**
Kaederon!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:48] Unity**
Unity-chan...
**[15:51] Unity**
Hey! Today I'm here to solve your problems,
and I'm on a roll!
**[15:54] Unity**
Let's take a call right now. Hello?
**[15:58] Caller**
*Hello.*
**[15:59] Unity**
What can I help you with today?
**[16:01] Caller**
*Well, I'm kind of nervous about something.*
**[16:04] Unity**
Mmhm!
**[16:04] Caller**
* I keep getting this feeling*
* something is in my room.*
**[16:07] Caller**
*Like someone is watching me all the time.*
**[16:12] Unity**
And have you talked to the police?
**[16:13] Caller**
*Well... that seems a bit extreme.*
**[16:15] Narrator**
*Did you notice that?*
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Hoshikawa Sora
**[16:19] Chaco**
People of Earth, nice to meet you!
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:23] Chaco**
I am the virtual alien idol, Hoshikawa Sora!
**[16:27] Chaco**
Virtual-san is looking again, today!
**[16:31] Chaco**
See you around!
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:46] Hina**
Hime, why are we up in the mountains?
**[16:49] ---**
It's so cold!
**[16:51] Hime**
I heard a rumor that Kerin
was recuperating up here!
**[16:55] Hina**
He's still alive?!
**[16:57] Hime**
Well, I feel kinda bad about what happened,
**[17:00] Hime**
so I figured I'd bring this to make amends.
**[17:02] Hina**
Hey, it's a picture of Elu-san!
**[17:07] Hime**
I figure if we find him, I can hand it over.
**[17:10] Hina**
You're such a sweetheart, Hime-san!
**[17:12] Kerin**
What's all the noise?
**[17:15] Kerin**
You two again?!
**[17:17] Hina**
Oh, there he is.
**[17:18] Hina**
Hi there, remember us?
**[17:20] Hina**
It's Hime and Hina, the Kerin Slayers.
**[17:23] Kerin**
I remember every last detail!
**[17:25] Kerin**
You two got in the way
of Elu-san and my love!
**[17:30] Hime & Hina**
Love?
**[17:31] Kerin**
Suck on this, you two!
**[17:32] Hime**
Wait, wait, wait! Just hear me out!
**[17:35] Kerin**
I don't want to hear your excuses!
**[17:36] Hina**
Th-This is bad! If those detonate,
it'll cause an avalanche,
**[17:39] Hina**
and then the bears will be in trouble!
**[17:42] ---**
Take this! Ancient Magic: Missile De'Fleckt!
**[17:46] Kerin**
What?! My missile...
**[17:54] Hime**
Hey, something got hit.
**[17:56] ---**
Was it some birdies?
**[17:57] Hime**
Sorry!
**[17:59] Hina**
The birdies!
**[18:01] Kerin**
How dare you deflect my missile!
**[18:03] Kerin**
Keblins!
**[18:06] Hime**
So many Keblins!
**[18:12] Hime**
Wait, wait! One of you just
said kebab! I'm positive.
**[18:15] Hina**
Wow, I could go for kebabs.
**[18:17] Hime**
Same.
**[18:17] Hina**
But, wow, this is bad!
**[18:19] Kerin**
Farewell, little girls!
**[18:21] Kerin**
Now, swarm them!
**[18:23] Hime & Hina**
No!
**[18:26] Game Club**
Hold it right there!
**[18:27] Everyone**
Who's that?!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:38] Uma**
Can I ask you about something, Sister?
**[18:41] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[18:42] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[18:43] Uma**
Well, I—
**[18:50] Sister**
What is it?
**[18:51] Sora**
I hate doing my makeup when I have days off!
Not to mention, I'm not a morning person,
**[18:54] Sora**
so sometimes I go out without any.
**[18:56] Sora**
I'd be embarrassed to run
into someone I know,
**[18:59] Sora**
but to be honest, it feels like
more trouble than it's worth.
**[19:01] Sister**
I can understand why you'd feel that way.
**[19:03] Sister**
It might be a better idea
to take the time to do it.
**[19:07] Sora**
I know, right?
**[19:08] Sora**
What do you think might help?
**[19:10] Sister**
Perhaps you could put on one of
the masks that wrestlers wear.
**[19:14] Sora**
Like a masked wrestler?!
**[19:16] Sister**
If you go out looking like a masked
wrestler in their private life,
**[19:18] ---**
I'm sure your friends won't recognize you.
**[19:21] Sora**
I get the feeling people
might ask me what I do for a living.
**[19:24] Sister**
In that case, maybe you could
wear one of those horse masks.
**[19:27] Sister**
That certainly isn't an
odd sight in this town.
**[19:32] Sora**
Oh, yeah! I think I saw one
of those just the other day!
**[19:35] Sora**
I'll try it!
**[19:38] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[19:40] Uma**
Be careful about getting enough air
when summer rolls around, though!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:48] Uma**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[19:50] Uma**
Neiiiigh!
**[19:53] Akari**
Okay, we've got a letter here.
**[19:56] Akari**
It's from someone with the
pen name "Eternal Blizzard."
**[19:59] Everybody**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:02] Akari**
"Don't you think that
titles are really cool?"
**[20:05] Akari**
"I really do!"
**[20:06] Akari**
"If you all could add titles to your names,
what would they be like? Please tell me!"
***SIGN*** Coming up with titles!
**[20:13] Everybody**
Titles, huh...
**[20:14] Shiro**
I think Akari-chan's should include
her favorite article of clothing...
**[20:17] Shiro**
The one down there.
**[20:20] Akari**
You mean the v-shaped thing?
**[20:21] Hime**
V-shaped!
**[20:23] Akari**
I actually have one I came up with, though!
**[20:25] Hime**
No way!
**[20:27] Akari**
My title would be...
**[20:31] Akari**
"The Walking Free Directory!"
**[20:32] Mito**
Oh, wow!
***SIGN*** They discussed it for about 20 minutes,
so let's cut straight to the titles!
**[20:38] Akari**
Then I'll just be The Walking PK.
***SIGN*** Walking PK
(Panty-Krammed)
**[20:40] Hime**
I like that!
**[20:41] Mito**
PK!
**[20:42] Shiro**
The Bloody Beautiful White...
***SIGN*** The Bloody Beautiful White Dolphinch
**[20:44] Hina**
Dolphinch!
**[20:45] Mito**
Dolphinch?
**[20:47] Shiro**
Emergency Chuckle 119.
***SIGN*** Emergency Chuckle 119
**[20:48] Hime**
Oh, like the phone number!
**[20:51] Hime**
The Navely Venus Otaku Freak.
***SIGN*** The Navely Venus Otaku Freak
**[20:52] Mito**
Navely Venus Otaku Freak?
**[20:55] Shiro**
The Weed-Eating Human
Centipede High Schooler.
***SIGN*** The Weed-Eating
Human Centipede High Schooler
**[20:59] Hime**
The Fluffy Pink Renegade.
***SIGN*** The Fluffy Pink Renegade
**[21:00] Mito**
The Fluffy Pink Renegade!
That's got a nice rhythm to it!
**[21:03] Akari**
Let's wrap it up by sounding off!
**[21:05] Akari**
This has been brought to you
by the Walking PK, Mirai Akari!
**[21:09] Shiro**
The Bloody Beautiful White Dolphinch,
Cyber Girl Siro!
**[21:13] Hime**
The Emergency Chuckle 119, Tanaka Hime!
**[21:15] Hina**
The Navely Venus Otaku Freak, Suzuki Hina!
**[21:18] Mito**
The Weed-Eating Human Centipede
High Schooler, Tsukino Mito!
**[21:21] Hinata**
And the Fluffy Pink Renegade,
Nekomiya Hinata!
**[21:25] Akari**
That does it for this time!
So until next week,
**[21:29] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Tsukiyo Sora
**[23:09] Tsukiyo & Sora**
Hello there everyone, I'm Tsukiyo Sora.
**[23:11] Tsukiyo & Sora**
Muscle strain is the flavor of youth,
**[23:13] Tsukiyo & Sora**
menthol is the smell of first love,
**[23:14] Tsukiyo & Sora**
and my legs carried me to a warm café
where I made some harsh-tasting memories,
**[23:18] Tsukiyo & Sora**
but in the evening they all became
bittersweet memorial events.
**[23:21] Tsukiyo & Sora**
As things are, this virtual space
might be the embodiment of my
**[23:24] ---**
youthful days that will
never fade, even as I age.
**[23:27] Tsukiyo & Sora**
You're not sure what I mean?
**[23:29] ---**
I'm not too sure myself.
**[23:30] ---**
But there's one thing I know that
I'm supposed to say, so here goes.
**[23:33] ---**
Next time is "Transmigration
of an Old Lady's Soul."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"Transmigration of an Old Lady's Soul"
**[23:36] ---**
Virtual-san will be looking again next week.
# E9 - Transmigration of an Old Lady's Soul
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6G573VP6/transmigration-of-an-old-ladys-soul)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] Unity**
There!
**[00:00] Unity**
There!
**[00:02] Peanuts**
They say the one yen coin costs
more than one yen to make, y'know.
**[00:05] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey! So how much
does it cost to make Peanut?
**[00:07] Peanuts**
Are you asking about my body?
**[00:08] ---**
That's getting way too personal,
you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
Hey hey!
**[00:14] Shiro**
Hey everybody! Let's play the V.V. game!
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[00:17] Hime**
Yeah, the V.V. game!
**[00:19] Everybody**
Yeah! V.V.! V.V.! Yay!
**[00:24] Shiro**
All right, here we go!
**[00:26] Shiro**
Ready and... Virtual-san!
**[00:29] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:30] Hinata**
Crowd of one!
**[00:31] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:33] Hinata**
Virtual-san!
**[00:34] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:35] Hime**
Crowd of two!
**[00:36] Everyone**
Everyone: V.V.!
**[00:37] Hime**
Virtual-san, the horse!
**[00:38] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:40] Akari**
Team of three!
**[00:41] Everyone**
V.V.!
**[00:42] Hina**
Huh, wait a second, just wait a second.
**[00:44] Hina**
Why does Virtual-san make it a team?
**[00:47] Mito**
True, he is shaped like a human.
**[00:49] Akari**
Come on, he's a horse!
**[00:51] Shiro**
Good point. I'm not sure which it is.
**[00:53] Shiro**
Let me call him real quick.
**[00:58] Shiro**
Answer the phone, horse. Come on already.
**[01:01] Akari**
I bet he counts as a horse!
**[01:03] Shiro**
Oh, hey, horse?
**[01:05] Uma**
*Hey, hey!*
**[01:06] Shiro**
Do we count you as a person, or a horse?
**[01:10] Uma**
* I'm a horse-faced human, so I*
* count as human! Hey, hey, hey—*
**[01:15] Shiro**
Apparently, he's human.
**[01:16] Akari**
Damn it! That horsey bastard!
**[01:20] Mito**
Well, since Akari-san got it wrong,
**[01:21] ---**
she has to pretend to be Virtual-san
when we do the title call this week.
**[01:25] Akari**
Do I have to?
**[01:27] Shiro**
In that case, let's get to it! Ready, and...
**[01:31] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[01:33] Akari**
Hey, hey!
**[03:20] Miria**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:21] Miria**
Yay!
***SIGN*** Mob C
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 3
**[03:24] Mob C**
Where did you come from?
**[03:26] Hime**
Where *did* we come from?
**[03:28] Hina**
Hmm, not sure!
**[03:30] Mito**
More importantly, is there something
we can help you all with?
**[03:33] Mob C**
Of course there is! We're here
to remove you by force!
***SIGN*** Mob C
**[03:37] Shiro**
By force?
**[03:39] Hinata**
Remove?
**[03:40] Akari**
Oh, gosh. Here, where everyone can see?
**[03:43] Mito**
I think you might be
imagining the wrong thing.
**[03:46] Mob C**
Listen up! When I heard that you six Vtubers
were going to have a crossover on TV,
**[03:51] ---**
I was really hyped about it!
***SIGN*** Mob D
**[03:55] Mob C**
But then we saw something that
totally defied our expectations!
**[03:57] Mob E**
It was like something from another dimension!
***SIGN*** Mob E
**[04:01] Hime**
Yeah, I get that.
**[04:02] Hina**
Not sure what you expect
us to do about it, though.
**[04:05] Mob C**
And now, you're here!
***SIGN*** Mob C
**[04:08] Mob Group**
That can't be allowed!
**[04:11] Mito**
Hey, wait—!
**[04:11] Akari**
No!
***SIGN*** Mob A
**[04:15] Mob A**
Hey! What are you doing?!
**[04:17] Robo**
I don't know, but I can't let this happen!
**[04:23] Robo**
Did I just jump?
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Virtual Kerin Slayer Wars.
**[04:38] Hime**
That was a close one!
**[04:40] Hime**
The Keblins all got smashed!
**[04:42] Hina**
But by who?! And why?
**[04:44] Kerin**
You people!
**[04:45] Kerin**
You would dare harm my darling Keblins?
Identify yourselves!
**[04:49] Kaede**
We are the Game Club!
**[04:50] Kaede**
An empire that has destroyed countless virtual
countries in pursuit of a unified galaxy!
**[04:54] Haruto**
That's the idea, but...
**[04:56] Haruto**
Chief, we can't move!
**[04:58] Ryo**
They're so heavy, and they won't come off.
**[05:00] Ryo**
Must be all the gravity.
**[05:03] Miria**
I'm stuck!
**[05:06] Kerin**
You think this is a joke!?
**[05:07] Hina**
Hey, why did you all crash
here in those things?
**[05:12] Kaede**
Well, we were on our ship having a
meeting about conquering the universe,
**[05:17] Kaede**
but then a missile hit us out of nowhere.
**[05:19] Miria**
That's right. It hit us out of the blue,
and we had to put on these suits to escape.
**[05:24] Hime**
Kerin-kun...
**[05:25] Ryo**
And then we got pulled in
by this planet's gravity.
**[05:29] Haruto**
And there you have it!
**[05:30] Haruto**
I'm just glad that no one seems to be hurt.
**[05:33] Hina**
Huh, he seems pretty nice.
**[05:35] Hime**
Hey, Kerin! That was your missile, dude!
**[05:38] Kerin**
Uh... well... I don't know what to say.
**[05:41] Miria**
You're the one who shot that missile at us?!
**[05:43] Haruto**
You have some nerve,
picking a fight with our Game Club!
**[05:46] Ryo**
You hit us, we hit back... and then some!
**[05:49] Haruto**
Exactly!
**[05:50] Haruto**
We will pool our powers to strike you down!
**[05:53] Haruto**
Won't we?!
**[05:56] Hime**
One of them has a real obnoxious laugh.
**[05:58] Hina**
So do you, though.
**[05:59] Haruto**
You there, what's with that pink hair?!
**[06:01] Haruto**
It's like... a pink fool!
**[06:04] Miria**
Shut up Harutrash! That girl's cute!
**[06:07] Miria**
I get the feeling we'd get along!
**[06:08] Miria**
Hi there! I'm Miria.
**[06:10] Hime**
Miria-chan! Nice to meet you,
I'm Chuckling Pink, Hime!
**[06:13] Kaede**
Everyone, listen!
**[06:14] Kaede**
Our main problem right now is
finding a way out of these suits!
**[06:17] Ryo**
Good point...
**[06:18] Kaede**
You're Kerin-kun, right?
**[06:20] Kerin**
Yes, Yamikumo Kerin.
**[06:22] Kaede**
Help us figure a way out!
**[06:24] Kerin**
Certainly!
**[06:24] Hime**
Last time, didn't we have to spam
a bunch of lightning to fix it?
**[06:29] Hime**
So what now?
**[06:31] Hina**
Should I call the thunder?
**[06:32] Kerin**
You shouldn't!
**[06:33] Kaede**
Well, we can move a little bit.
Maybe we should run into each other?
**[06:37] Ryo**
Good idea, chief!
**[06:38] Ryo**
Since they have the same mass, maybe a
collision will cause them to be obliterated!
**[06:42] Miria**
Okay, Harutrash, let's try it out!
**[06:44] Haruto**
Wait, you pink fool!
**[06:45] Haruto**
We should run some more numbers first—
**[06:48] Miria**
Ow! That didn't work.
**[06:51] Kaede**
All it did was hurt you.
**[06:53] Hina**
I think I see a crack, though?
**[06:56] Hime**
I know! I've got just the thing!
**[06:58] Hime**
I call it, "Bowling with the Game Club!"
**[07:02] Miria**
Bowling?
**[07:03] Hime**
First, we line Miria-chan and
the others up like this.
**[07:06] Ryo**
What's the idea here?
**[07:07] Kaede**
Let's follow Hime-chan's
instructions for now.
**[07:10] Hime**
All right, everything's set!
**[07:12] Hime**
Kerin, send that other one
this way! Just roll him over!
**[07:15] Kerin**
Got it!
**[07:16] Haruto**
What?! Human bowling?!
**[07:19] Haruto**
Chuckling Pink, what kind
of plan is this?!
**[07:22] Kerin**
Gonna smash em all!
**[07:26] Hime**
Yay! Strike!
**[07:28] Hina**
They got out, but it definitely wasn't easy.
**[07:31] Kaede**
Ow, ow, ow... Is everyone okay?
**[07:34] Miria**
I might be in shock.
**[07:35] Ryo**
I think I'm fine.
**[07:36] Haruto**
You'll pay for this, Chuckling Pink!
**[07:39] Hime**
You got some kind of beef with me,
Harutrash?! You wanna become space debris?
**[07:42] Hina**
Yeah, Harutrash!
You wanna go in the shredder?
**[07:45] Haruto**
You people...
**[07:47] Haruto**
Very well, then! I'm gonna blow you all up!
**[08:06] Kerin**
Um... Are we going to
continue Kerin Slayer?
**[08:10] Kaede**
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
**[08:18] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[08:21] Grandma**
Banbutsu ruten.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Banbutsu ruten
**[08:24] Banner**
That's the phrase.
**[08:27] G**
It refers to how everything in
the world is always changing.
**[08:31] G**
Think about how much, and in how many
different ways, music has changed.
**[08:37] G**
Nowadays you can watch music videos
legally for free online, right?
**[08:42] G**
But in the old days, you were limited
to records, radio, and TV for music.
**[08:48] G**
Even in the case of records,
it's not like everyone owned a player.
**[08:53] G**
I imagine the majority were getting
their music from radio and TV.
**[08:58] G**
I was no exception, of course.
**[08:59] G**
Back then, I had this impulse
to want to learn a lot of songs,
**[09:02] G**
so I would be listening to the radio,
focusing on the lyrics and writing them down.
**[09:08] G**
Usually three or four times was enough was
enough for me to have the entire song down,
**[09:12] G**
and by then I'd usually have
the melody memorized, too.
**[09:16] G**
Now that I think about it,
the way you can just look up
**[09:18] ---**
lyrics online is one of the things
that's remarkable about our modern age.
**[09:23] G**
It goes to show that things
are always changing.
**[09:26] G**
All things continue to turn,
and turn, and turn!
**[09:31] G**
Round and around and around!
**[09:34] G**
Round and around it goes!
**[09:36] G**
Around it goes!
**[09:51] G**
Grandma is looking.
**[09:55] Hime & Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[10:03] Aoi**
How do you think we can get more visitors?
**[10:06] Gori**
That's a good question.
**[10:08] Aoi**
Do you have any friends
we could ask to come over?
**[10:11] Gori**
Friends of mine?
**[10:12] Aoi**
Yeah, the kind that might attract a crowd!
**[10:14] ---**
That could net us some visitors!
**[10:15] Aoi**
Like Nekomiya Hinata-chan!
**[10:18] Gori**
I think she's probably too
busy with video games.
**[10:20] Aoi**
What about Tsukino Mito-chan?
**[10:23] Gori**
I get the feeling she'd eat all our grass,
so that's probably a bad idea.
**[10:28] Aoi**
Come on, there has to be somebody!
**[10:30] Gori**
I know just the person!
**[10:31] Aoi**
Who is it?!
**[10:32] Gori**
Virtual-san.
**[10:34] Aoi**
You really think that's a good idea?
**[10:36] Gori**
Now that you mention it... sure enough.
**[10:38] Uma**
Aoi-chan! I'm here already!
**[10:41] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[10:43] Gori**
Hello!
**[10:46] Hime**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[10:51] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[11:03] Hime**
That's Mirai Akari's Morse code!
**[11:05] Hime**
Akari-chan, there's really big trouble!
**[11:09] Akari**
Wait, what?
**[11:11] Hime**
So you can talk!
**[11:13] Hime**
Well, pen name "Tom-kun" is in trouble!
**[11:15] Hime**
So seriously, ready this already,
please! Beep, beep, beep...
**[11:17] Akari**
Sure, okay, beep beep beep.
**[11:19] Akari**
"Hello, Akari-san."
**[11:20] Hime**
H'lo!
**[11:20] Akari**
Hello there.
**[11:22] Akari**
"I love watching stuff on YouTube!"
**[11:24] Hime**
Oh, nice!
**[11:25] Akari**
"But lately I've had the problem where
once I start watching it, I can't stop."
**[11:29] Akari**
"I start watching it when I go to bed,
and before I notice it, it's already morning."
**[11:33] Akari**
"When I spend that much time watching videos,
**[11:34] ---**
it makes me wonder if I could be
using that time more effectively?"
**[11:37] Akari**
And then I start to feel guilty."
**[11:39] Hime**
I get that! I totally get that!
***SIGN*** Problem: Unable to stop watching YouTube
**[11:41] Akari**
If you have Autoplay on, you tend
to end up watching what's up next!
**[11:45] Hime**
Yeah, yeah!
**[11:46] Akari**
Well, let's see, then. It's great
to enjoy watching YouTube,
**[11:50] Akari**
but Tom-kun feels bad about
staying up all night to watch it?
**[11:53] Hime**
Yeah.
**[11:54] Akari**
I wonder if there's a good solution?
**[11:59] Hime**
Hey, Mirai-san?
**[12:02] ---**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[12:04] Hikari**
This is simple!
**[12:05] Hikari**
You just need to limit how much time
you spend watching videos each day.
**[12:09] Hikari**
All it takes is a little discipline!
**[12:11] Yami**
How is that any fun?
**[12:14] Yami**
You need to be more true to your desires!
**[12:17] Yami**
Even if you can't focus on work or other
hobbies because of the lack of sleep,
**[12:19] Yami**
as long as you enjoy watching
videos all night, that's fine!
**[12:22] Hikari**
That's way too indulgent.
**[12:24] Hikari**
Everything is best in moderation.
**[12:26] Yami**
Who gives a crap?
**[12:28] Yami**
You only live once.
**[12:29] ---**
So all that matters is enjoying it.
**[12:31] Yami**
Watch all the vids you want!
**[12:33] Hikari**
Oh, this is no good...
**[12:35] Hikari**
Akari, take it from here.
**[12:38] Hime**
Hello! Earth to Mirai-san?
**[12:43] Akari**
Sorry, I was deep in thought!
**[12:44] Hime**
I appreciate the effort!
**[12:45] Akari**
Thank you so much!
**[12:48] Akari**
Pen name Tom-kun!
**[12:50] ---**
Here's the bottom line!
**[12:52] Hime**
Is she gonna get to it?! Her bottom... line?!
**[12:55] Akari**
You need a night job!
**[12:59] Hime**
A night job?!
**[12:59] Akari**
Yep! He wants to use his all-night
YouTube time more productively, right?
**[13:04] Akari**
In that case, he should get a night
job in addition to his day job!
**[13:09] Hime**
I see!
**[13:11] Akari**
That way, all that time he's spent watching
videos will all be turned into cash!
**[13:17] Hime**
Amazing! One simple trick!
**[13:19] Akari**
Plus!
**[13:21] Akari**
If you end up working that much, it limits
how much free time you have, right?
**[13:25] Hime**
True enough.
**[13:26] Akari**
That way, you can use your limited time
**[13:27] ---**
to make sure you only watch the videos
you're genuinely interested in!
**[13:32] Akari**
Like mine, for instance!
**[13:34] Hime**
She even threw in some self-promotion!
She's a natural!
**[13:36] Akari**
So, go and get a night job!
**[13:40] Hime**
But what if they're still a student,
and don't have a job yet?
**[13:48] Akari**
In that case, start going to night classes!
**[13:50] Hime**
I forgot about that option!
**[13:51] Akari**
Yeah! To make sure you don't
watch too much YouTube,
**[13:55] ---**
forget about sleeping, get a job
at night, or go to class at night!
**[13:57] Akari**
You've gotta use your
limited time effectively!
**[13:58] Akari**
That's the best life hack possible!
**[14:00] Hime**
Amazing! That's Akari-senpai
for you! So conscientious!
**[14:05] Hime**
Oh, that reminds me! Next week,
I'm gonna be bringing something different.
**[14:09] Akari**
Seriously?!
**[14:09] Hime**
See you then!
**[14:10] Akari**
Oh, okay. Got it! Come back soon!
**[14:13] Hime**
Yeah!
**[14:14] Akari**
See you next time! Bye-bye!
**[14:16] Hime**
Gotta get a job!
**[14:17] Hime**
Gotta sweat two liters away!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[14:24] Hinata**
Hey, hopscotch!
**[14:26] Hinata**
I remember playing this when
I was little and innocent.
**[14:31] Hinata**
One, two, three! One, two, three! One...
**[14:39] ---**
This is bad.
**[14:41] Hinata**
A sparrow's nest somehow fell to
at the end of this hopscotch court.
**[14:45] Hinata**
If I keep playing, that's gonna
be the end for those baby birds!
**[14:50] Hinata**
That'll make the mother super upset,
**[14:51] ---**
and you'll go crazy with anger,
pecking me without mercy!
**[14:57] Hinata**
But there's a risk in
leaving it as it is, too.
**[14:59] Hinata**
What do I do? What can I do?
**[15:16] Hinata**
Live strong, little sparrows.
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[15:23] Mugi**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[15:32] Shiro**
Oh, it's Rikiya-kun! Welcome!
**[15:35] Touya**
It's Toya!
**[15:37] Touya**
Man, I am so fed up.
**[15:38] Touya**
Can I get some trivia about crabs, please?
***SIGN*** Crabs
**[15:44] Shiro**
Sure, coming right up!
**[15:46] Shiro**
Did you know they're related to spiders?
**[15:49] ---**
That's why they have eight legs!
**[15:55] Touya**
I'm not quite full yet.
**[15:57] ---**
Can I get some more?
**[16:01] ---**
Trivia, go!
**[16:04] Shiro**
Crabs...
**[16:05] Shiro**
Snow crabs and red king crabs
are probably the most popular.
**[16:09] Shiro**
But did you know that red king crabs are
technically, specifically, hermit crabs?
**[16:14] Shiro**
That's why, though most crabs only
walk sideways, they're able to walk forwards.
**[16:20] Shiro**
And in Japanese, red king crabs got their
**[16:23] ---**
names from being found in
the same locations as cod.
**[16:26] Shiro**
They're called taraba gani!
***SIGN*** Tara
(Cod)
***SIGN*** ba
(Location)
***SIGN*** Gani
(Crab)
**[16:30] Shiro**
Incidentally, I recommend eating red
king crab with cyber sesame sauce!
**[16:38] Toya**
Wow, I didn't know.
**[16:39] Toya**
Your trivia really is handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[16:48] Suigetsu**
Good day, everyone.
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Suigetsu
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:51] Suigetsu**
It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance.
**[16:54] Suigetsu**
My name is Suigetsu.
**[16:56] Suigetsu**
That's the character for "green" and
the character for "moon," for "Suigetsu."
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[17:05] Mito**
I wonder who's joining me today?
**[17:10] Alice**
Hello, Class President!
**[17:12] Alice**
I heard we were due for more tea!
**[17:14] Mito**
Ah, good to see you, and welcome, Alice.
**[17:16] Alice**
It's our second tea time!
**[17:17] Mito**
That it is.
**[17:18] Mito**
Let's begin your second visit to the ultimate
"Would you rather" committee/tea party!
**[17:23] Mito**
Here is our subject today!
**[17:25] Mito**
In exchange for one hundred million yen,
**[17:26] ---**
every song you hear from now on will be
"We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
**[17:29] Mito**
A) Sounds good, or B) No way.
**[17:31] Alice**
"We Wish You A Merry Christmas"?
**[17:34] Alice**
I like that carol, but would
that mean the opening
**[17:37] ---**
and ending theme songs
would be replaced with it?
**[17:39] Mito**
That's right, that would be the case.
**[17:40] Mito**
This would be an anime that starts with
"We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
**[17:43] Alice**
Seems like a odd choice, considering.
**[17:46] Mito**
True enough. Not only that,
but all the music in commercials
**[17:48] Mito**
and the New Year's Eve concert special
would be "We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
**[17:54] Alice**
But I think it would vary some depending on
**[17:56] ---**
if say, Ai-chan or Himehina-chan
were singing it.
**[17:57] Mito**
Oh, good point.
**[17:58] Alice**
I'd like to hear all the different versions.
**[18:01] Mito**
True, there's no rule that says
the vocalists can't change.
**[18:03] Alice**
Quite right.
**[18:04] Mito**
But y'know, if that was the
only thing you heard otherwise,
**[18:07] Mito**
actually hearing "We Wish You a
Merry Christmas" during actual Christmas time
**[18:11] Mito**
might feel like the culmination of something,
**[18:13] ---**
and as a result, sound a
lot more special than usual.
**[18:18] Alice**
Oh, I see.
**[18:19] Alice**
But I think that even if I were
being paid, I wouldn't like for
**[18:22] ---**
all the wonderful music
in the world to disappear.
**[18:25] Mito**
I dunno, Alice-chan, I think...
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[18:28] Mito**
Alice-chan, the correct
answer is A) Sounds good!
**[18:33] Alice**
But I want to enjoy all that music!
**[18:36] Mito**
You need to abandon that naïve nonsense!
**[18:38] Mito**
Money makes the world go round!
**[18:39] Mito**
A rap version would
probably be allowed, also!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[18:45] Alice**
While enjoying some lovely tea,
Virtual-san is once again looking today!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[18:51] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[18:54] Unity**
This is where it gets serious!
**[18:56] Unity**
Okay, let's do it!
**[18:58] Unity**
Gotta be careful... There!
**[19:03] Unity**
Wait to the last second!
**[19:04] Unity**
There!
**[19:06] Unity**
Oh, one more time!
**[19:09] Unity**
I did it!
**[19:18] Unity**
How does this happen?
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:27] Uma**
I hope you can hear me out today, Sister.
**[19:29] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:30] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:31] Uma**
I've always—
**[19:38] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:40] Sora**
My friends are always getting mad at
me for not replying to their messages.
**[19:44] Sora**
How can I stop forgetting to respond?
**[19:46] Sister**
Let's see.
**[19:47] Sister**
The most serious response would be to
**[19:49] ---**
make sure you check your messages
at the end of every day,
**[19:53] ---**
but I imagine you wouldn't be having this
trouble if you could remember to do that.
**[19:57] Sora**
Exactly!
**[19:58] Sister**
Why not change the name on
your messaging app then?
**[20:01] Sora**
Huh? Not my nickname?
**[20:04] Sister**
Right.
**[20:05] Sister**
For example, you could change it to
"Tokino Sora, the Jerk Who Never Replies."
**[20:10] Sora**
That's crazy... but I get it!
**[20:13] Sora**
"Tokino Sora, the Jerk Who
Never Replies"... There!
**[20:16] Sora**
Now I won't get yelled at anymore! Hooray!
**[20:20] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:22] Uma**
Sister! Could you reply to the
message I sent yesterday?!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:28] Unity**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[20:30] Unity**
These croquettes are delish!
**[20:35] Shiro**
Okay, I've got a letter here.
**[20:38] Shiro**
It's from someone with
the pen name "PGGP-san."
**[20:41] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:43] Shiro**
"Right now, I'm trying to come up
with a trick for drinking parties,
**[20:47] ---**
but I'm having trouble thinking up anything."
**[20:49] Shiro**
"Since I'm sure you all are
very talented in that regard,
**[20:53] ---**
could you come up with one I could use?"
**[20:58] Hime**
That's crazy!
**[20:58] Shiro**
Okay, Mito-Mito!
**[21:00] Mito**
Well, uh, this might get me in
trouble a lot of different ways.
**[21:03] Akari**
Oh, wow! What is it?!
**[21:04] Mito**
I'm going to do an impression of Facerig 2D.
**[21:18] Hime**
She's bugging out!
**[21:19] Hinata**
She keeps twitching!
**[21:23] Shiro**
Okay, okay, we're out of time,
so that's it for this week!
**[21:27] Shiro**
So until next week,
**[21:29] Everyone**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:09] Both**
Hey yo, what up! KMNZ here!
**[23:11] Lita**
I'm MC Lita.
**[23:12] Liz**
I'm MC Liz.
**[23:13] Lita**
Another day, another episode!
**[23:14] Liz**
Good work people!
**[23:15] Lita**
I've been so busy I forgot to
eat dinner, so I'm starving!
**[23:17] Lita**
Did you remember to eat, Liz?
**[23:19] Liz**
Yep, I made sure to get something
good in me! It was really tasty!
**[23:22] Lita**
Sounds great, what did you eat?
**[23:23] Liz**
Pineapple!
**[23:24] Lita**
Oh, big juicy pineapples!
**[23:28] Both**
There were two dirty jokes
hidden in that conversation.
**[23:30] ---**
Did you notice?
**[23:32] Liz**
Next week is "Letting Your
Horse Carry You Whenever."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"Letting Your Horse Carry You Whenever"
**[23:34] Lita**
And next week,
**[23:35] Both**
Virtual-san will still be looking!
# E10 - Letting Your Horse Carry You Whenever
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR0X0V3EY/letting-your-horse-carry-you-whenever)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanuts**
They say that a camel's
humps are filled with fat.
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey, what are
you filled with, Peanut?
**[00:08] Peanuts**
I'm filled with heart, you horsey bastard!
**[00:10] Uma**
That's a good one!
**[00:10] Peanuts**
Shut it!
**[00:14] Hina**
*To, to, tomato!*
**[00:16] Hina**
*Pronunciation is really hard.*
**[00:18] Hina**
*Tomato!*
**[00:21] Shiro**
Oh, are you practicing English?
**[00:23] Hina**
Yeah!
**[00:24] Akari**
English pronunciation is so hard!
**[00:29] Mito**
*Good morning, everyone.*
**[00:31] Shiro**
Good morning, Mito-Mito!
**[00:33] Mito**
You want to talk about English, right?
**[00:35] Mito**
Then leave it to me!
**[00:37] Mito**
We'll start with you, Tanaka-san.
**[00:39] Hime**
*Virtual.*
**[00:40] Mito**
*No! Next!*
**[00:42] Hinata**
*Virtual!*
**[00:43] Mito**
My, that is adorable.
**[00:45] Akari**
*Virtuaaal!*
**[00:47] Mito**
Who was that supposed to be?
**[00:48] Mito**
Come on, everyone, this is no good!
**[00:50] Mito**
I guess I'll have to show an example...
**[00:52] Shiro**
*Virtual.*
**[00:53] Mito**
What?
**[00:54] Shiro**
*Virtual.*
**[00:55] Everyone**
Wow!
**[00:56] Everyone**
Nice one, Siro-chan!
**[00:56] Everyone**
That was great!
**[01:01] Everyone**
I mean,that is to say, exactly
what I expected from Siro-sama.
**[01:04] Everyone**
Although your inflection was slightly off.
**[01:08] Shiro**
Teacher, why don't you show us an example?!
**[01:10] Mito**
Uh, well, let's see, um...
**[01:13] Mito**
*V... Vir... Virtu...*
**[01:16] Mito**
Oh, no! Look at the time!
Gather around, everyone!
**[01:19] Hinata**
She dodged it.
**[01:20] Hina**
She totally dodged it.
**[01:22] Hina**
Mito-sensei, are you going to pronounce
it the English way this week?
**[01:24] Mito**
No! But as virtual youtubers,
we need to focus on Japanese!
**[01:27] Mito**
You need a sturdy base to work with!
**[01:29] Mito**
Ready and...
**[01:30] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:17] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 4
**[03:23] Akari**
Eek, something weird touched me!
**[03:26] Hime**
Oh, that was me.
**[03:27] Mito**
What are you two trying to do in
the middle of this confusion?!
***SIGN*** Mob C
**[03:32] Mob C**
Wh-Who are you?!
**[03:38] Robo**
Everyone! Get on, quick!
**[03:40] Hime**
It transformed!
**[03:41] Hina**
A Transfor—
**[03:42] Mito**
Noooope!
**[03:46] Mito**
Thank you for rescuing us.
**[03:48] Robo**
It's nothing.
**[03:49] Akari**
Hey, can I ask you something?
**[03:51] Robo**
Sure.
**[03:52] Akari**
Out of the six of us, who's your type?
**[03:58] Robo**
Ow, ow, ow! Why would you ask that now?!
**[04:01] Akari**
Because I'm curious!
**[04:03] Hina**
Now that you mention it, I might be, too.
**[04:05] Hinata**
We can decide who is on top
of the group's hierarchy...
**[04:09] Shiro**
Who gets to be the center of the unit?!
**[04:12] Robo**
No, no, no...
**[04:13] Robo**
I mean, getting asked out
of the blue like this...
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Virtual Kerin Slayer Wars
**[04:33] Haruto**
You're all going to pay for this.
**[04:36] Ryo**
Haru-kun, calm down!
We finally managed to get out of those suits.
**[04:39] Hime**
You got a problem?!
**[04:40] Hime**
You want those streaks yanked off your
head and replaced with smiley dumplings?!
**[04:42] Hina**
Down, down, girl... Easy does it.
**[04:44] Haruto**
Little girl, the fact that you have
pink hair is enough to disgust me!
**[04:48] Miria**
Harutrash, are you talking about me?
**[04:52] Ryo**
You need to stay calm too, Miria-chan!
**[04:54] Kaede**
Let's all just calm down and
try and find the culprit.
**[04:56] Kaede**
Don't you agree, Kerin-kun?
**[04:57] Kerin**
Well... Uh...
**[04:59] Kerin**
Those two Kerin Slayers
came after me, so I...
**[05:02] Hime**
You're the one who actually started it!
**[05:04] Ryo**
I feel kind of sorry for Kerin-kun.
**[05:06] Kerin**
Damn it all! I guess we're doing this!
**[05:10] Kerin**
This is their fault anyway!
**[05:13] Kerin**
But I guess I'll have to take you all down!
**[05:16] Hina**
W-Wait, stop, Kerin!
**[05:19] Kerin**
Super Ultimate Transformation
Magic, Buchisplurge!
**[05:23] Kaede**
That sounds dangerous...
**[05:25] Hina**
If we keep having to deal with him
we're risking mental pollution!
**[05:28] Hina**
Game Club! We need to work together
to stop Kerin from going berserk!
**[05:32] Ryo**
I agree! Chief! Haru-kun! Miria-chan!
Let's follow her orders for now!
**[05:36] Kaede**
Got it!
**[05:37] Miria**
Aye, aye, sir!
**[05:39] Haruto**
I suppose we have to!
**[05:40] Hime**
We'll pincer Kerin from the sides,
and then you all will use these!
**[05:44] Hime**
Nin!
**[05:46] Miria**
Wh-What the...?
**[05:47] Ryo**
Wow! These look powerful!
**[05:49] Hina**
Run Kerin through with those swords!
**[05:51] Kerin**
Hey, what's going on?!
**[05:53] Kerin**
Are we doing this, or not?!
**[05:56] Kerin**
You wanna get turned into tuna?!
**[05:57] Kerin**
Or maybe amberjack?!
**[05:59] Hina**
Hime, go!
**[06:00] Hime**
Yeah! Ninsplurge!
**[06:02] Kerin**
Damn it! Can't move...
**[06:04] Hime & Hina**
Now! Go!
**[06:17] Kerin**
Oh, no, not there!
**[06:19] Hime**
He's tougher than I thought.
**[06:20] Hina**
And seems to be enjoying it a little.
**[06:22] Haruto**
Hey, pink fool, you sure you
didn't stab him the wrong way?
**[06:25] Miria**
You stabbed him the wrong spot, Harutrash!
**[06:27] Kerin**
I guess that's the best you can muster!
**[06:30] Kerin**
Even together, you're no
match for the mighty Kerin!
**[06:35] Kaede**
I guess the swords aren't enough!
**[06:37] Kaede**
Do we have anything stronger?
**[06:38] Ryo**
Damn it, we almost had him!
**[06:41] Ryo**
He even looks like a pirate now!
**[06:45] Hime**
I understand.
This is a forbidden spell, but...
**[06:48] Hina**
Are you talking about... that?
**[06:50] Hime**
Let's do it.
**[06:51] Haruto**
Some sort of secret weapon?
**[06:52] Haruto**
You should've used it in the first place!
**[06:55] Hime & Hina**
In the name of the Girly Girl empire...
**[06:57] Hime & Hina**
In exchange for the life of the
dark one, grant us a weapon!
**[07:01] Haruto**
Wh-What the?! My body's floating!
**[07:04] Hime & Hina**
The Wicked Blade, Harutrash Sword!
**[07:07] Miria**
Harutrash...
**[07:09] Miria**
just turned into a sword!
**[07:10] Miria**
Hilarious.
**[07:11] Kaede**
Amazing! I had no idea he
had an alternate form!
**[07:14] Haruto**
Hey, what's the meaning
of this?! Ryo, save me!
**[07:16] Ryo**
Good luck, Haru-kun!
**[07:18] Hime**
Everyone, lend us your strength!
**[07:20] Hina**
We do this on go! Ready... go!
**[07:22] Everyone**
Harutrash Sword!
**[07:26] Kerin**
W-Wait! Stay back!
**[07:28] Kerin**
S-Stop!
**[07:31] Both**
We're getting blown away!
**[07:35] Hina**
That was a close one.
**[07:38] Kaede**
Thanks, Himehina-chan! I had no
idea magic like that existed.
**[07:41] Ryo**
That was a lot of fun!
I'm glad we crashed from space.
**[07:44] Hime**
Really?
**[07:45] Hime**
Harutrash just turned into
stardust, is that okay?
**[07:48] Miria**
Sure it is! Maybe that'll help
him cool off a little bit.
**[07:53] Hina**
You guys are really nice to Haruto-kun!
**[07:56] Miria**
Anyway, let's all play a game!
**[07:59] Kaede**
Good idea! Which one, though?
**[08:02] Hime**
Maybe Pop-Up Pirate?
**[08:04] Hime**
You're getting skewered next, Ryo-kun!
**[08:06] Ryo**
Aw, cut it out, Hime-chan!
**[08:10] Haruto**
Think of a way out of this!
**[08:11] Kerin**
Would you get out of me already?!
**[08:13] Haruto**
You need to pull me out or I'll blow you up!
**[08:16] Kerin**
Hey, that's my catchphrase!
**[08:18] Haruto**
Damn it! The five of them will pay for this!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
**[08:30] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[08:33] Grandma**
Bunmei Kaika.
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase:
Bunmei Kaika
**[08:36] G**
That's the phrase.
**[08:38] G**
It refers to, as human knowledge grows,
the world becomes more convenient.
**[08:43] G**
For example, can you all imagine
a time before package delivery?
**[08:48] G**
In the old days, your
only options for packages
**[08:51] G**
were the postal service
and railway delivery.
**[08:55] G**
The courier services first began serious
adoption in the latter half of the 1970s,
**[09:00] G**
developed through the 1980s, and only recently,
came to resemble what we have today.
**[09:07] G**
Come to think of it, you used to get
packages that came in solid wood boxes.
**[09:11] G**
And not a nice one either,
**[09:13] G**
but one that was crudely tied shut
with rope, that you had to force open.
**[09:17] G**
I imagine in those days, cardboard wasn't
as easy to get a hold of as it is now.
**[09:23] G**
Oh, a wooden box.
**[09:25] G**
Here we go.
**[09:27] Uma**
Woof!
**[09:29] G**
No, no, not woof...
**[09:31] G**
Aren't you a horse?
**[09:33] Uma**
Wofooom!
**[09:41] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[09:47] Siro**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[09:53] Aoi**
No guests ever seen to come by...
**[09:55] Gori**
Aoi-san is depressed.
I wish I could cheer her up.
**[09:59] Gori**
Aoi-san!
**[10:00] Aoi**
What is it?
**[10:01] Gori**
Get a load of this trick I can do!
**[10:03] Gori**
Come on, bananas!
**[10:06] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:08] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:11] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:12] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:14] Aoi**
Why is it raining bananas?!
**[10:15] Gori**
Hello! Hello! Hello!
**[10:16] Gori**
Heh-heh-hello!
Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-hello!
**[10:20] Gori**
I was hoping I could cheer you up
by practicing by banana catching...
**[10:24] Aoi**
Uh, making it rain bananas
is way more impressive!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[10:27] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
**[10:29] Gori**
Hello!
**[10:32] Mito**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble Akari-chan!
**[10:36] Mito**
I'm telling you, Akari-chan,
there's big trouble!
**[10:40] Akari**
What's wrong— Mito-chan?!
**[10:43] Mito**
Akari-san, there's big trouble afoot!
**[10:45] Akari**
There is?
**[10:46] Akari**
Oh, I guess you're taking over from now on!
**[10:48] Mito**
Indeed I am!
**[10:49] Akari**
So what is it?
**[10:50] Mito**
Penname Hitomi-chan, also known as
Tomi-Tomi, is worried about something!
**[10:53] Mito**
Please read this!
**[10:55] Akari**
AKA Tomi Tomi?
I wonder if it actually says that.
**[10:57] Mito**
No, rather, I was the one who decided that.
**[11:00] Akari**
I like it, it's cute! Tomi Tomi.
**[11:01] Mito**
Yes, indeed.
**[11:02] Akari**
Anyway, "Akari-san, hello."
**[11:04] Mito**
Hello there.
**[11:04] Akari**
Hello.
**[11:05] Akari**
"I'm a middle school student,"
**[11:07] Akari**
"and I really want to
become class president!"
**[11:10] Akari**
"But I'm not quite brave
enough to nominate myself."
**[11:13] Akari**
"Please tell me how to guarantee
victory if I do run!"
**[11:17] Mito**
A guaranteed victory...
***SIGN*** Problem: How to guarantee
a student council victory?
**[11:20] Akari**
Someone's greedy!
**[11:21] Mito**
It seems so, but as older ladies,
let's provide some answers.
**[11:23] Akari**
Good idea.
**[11:24] Akari**
Let's see, what kind of people
are suited for student council?
**[11:28] Mito**
Well, let me think.
**[11:29] Mito**
I think people who can't
make a strong impression
**[11:31] Mito**
will be doomed when the time
for speeches comes around.
**[11:34] Akari**
Oh, yeah, true. You can't be
throwing wimpy punches out there.
**[11:35] Mito**
Exactly!
**[11:36] Mito**
So you need to be able to draw a line!
**[11:38] Mito**
It needs to be the kind of person who can
say "no" definitively, and really mean it!
**[11:40] Akari**
Like an American?
**[11:42] Mito**
An American?
**[11:43] Mito**
I didn't mean that in the
literal, linguistic sense!
**[11:45] Mito**
I just meant no as in a negative response!
**[11:47] Mito**
We're not trying to answer riddles here!
**[11:50] Akari**
But Hitomi-chan wants guaranteed victory
in the student council election, right?
**[11:56] Mito**
Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
**[11:59] Yami**
Bribe 'em!
***SIGN*** Yami
***SIGN*** Hikari
**[12:01] Hikari**
Bzzt!
**[12:03] Hikari**
That's a terrible idea,
and we're talking about a student,
**[12:06] Hikari**
so it's not like she'd
have a lot of money.
**[12:08] Yami**
How about handing out some
tasty Japanese sweets, then?
**[12:12] Hikari**
That's not exactly legitimate, either.
**[12:16] Yami**
Well... You could always lure
your rival out behind the gym,
**[12:19] Yami**
sneak up behind them, and then—
**[12:21] Hikari**
Bzzzzt! Nope, nope, nope!
**[12:24] Hikari**
Sorry, Akari, take it from here.
**[12:29] Mito**
Hello? Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
**[12:33] Akari**
My consciousness was somewhere else...
**[12:34] Mito**
Welcome back, then.
**[12:35] Akari**
Good to be back.
**[12:37] Akari**
Penname Hitomi-chan! Here's the bottom line!
**[12:42] Mito**
She's going to expose it!
Her bottom... line!
**[12:45] Akari**
Start referring to yourself exclusively
as student council president!
**[12:50] Akari**
Right now, Hitomi-chan probably thinks
of herself as "me" or "Hitomi,"
***SIGN*** The class prez thinks ...
**[12:55] Akari**
but starting tomorrow, she needs to
do it exclusively as "Class Prez!"
**[12:59] Akari**
"As class president, I think this" and
**[13:02] Akari**
"The class president is kind
of tired", that sorta thing.
**[13:04] Mito**
So just declare it herself?
**[13:06] Akari**
Exactly!
**[13:06] Akari**
If you keep it up for long
enough, and act naturally,
**[13:10] Akari**
people will be brainwashed into thinking
"Oh, she must be class president."
**[13:13] Mito**
Is that really possible?!
**[13:14] Akari**
You bet it is!
**[13:16] Akari**
Not only that, but you need
to always wear the sash!
**[13:18] Akari**
Like you're telling people
"I'm the class president!"
**[13:20] Mito**
I don't think I've ever seen an actual
class president wear one of those...
**[13:22] Akari**
You can even force people to
start working on projects!
**[13:24] Akari**
Like telling the discipline
officer to do something,
**[13:26] Akari**
or asking a teacher about the schedule for
the meeting with the parents association...
**[13:29] Mito**
That's certainly the direct approach!
**[13:31] Akari**
And eventually, no one will doubt that
Hitomi-chan is the class president anymore,
**[13:35] Akari**
so no one will even think about candidates
or voting in the first place!
**[13:39] Mito**
Undermining the entire electoral process!
**[13:41] Akari**
You've got to keep a dream in your heart...
**[13:42] Akari**
Keeping it in your boobs won't do any good!
**[13:43] Mito**
I'm not sure what that
turn of phrase implies?
**[13:44] Akari**
You've gotta talk the talk!
**[13:46] Mito**
This has been educational.
**[13:48] Akari**
Starting tomorrow, when you
talk to your family or friends,
**[13:51] Akari**
or even give your name for
an order at restaurant...
**[13:53] Mito**
Even then?
**[13:54] Akari**
You always refer to yourself as class prez!
**[13:56] Akari**
That kind of passion is what will
take you to greater heights!
**[14:01] Mito**
Impressive, Akari-san!
**[14:03] Mito**
I'll be on my way, then.
**[14:05] Akari**
But I didn't get to slurp
on your zettai ryoiki yet!
**[14:08] Mito**
The script says I should say I'll be back,
but that comment really makes me not want to!
**[14:10] Akari**
Hey!
**[14:11] Akari**
Well, see you next time, Mito-chan! Bye-bye!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[14:26] Hinata**
I want to score some headshots!
**[14:34] Hinata**
Oh, this is bad.
**[14:36] Hinata**
The other day, Akari-chan popped
out from inside those pipes.
**[14:38] Hinata**
They might make a good hiding spot.
**[14:41] Hinata**
If I were to set up in
position with a 4x scope...
**[14:43] Hinata**
The second a head pops out from
the left of the pipe, bang!
**[14:46] Hinata**
Or, from the right, bang!
**[14:48] Hinata**
And even if they're behind the pipes,
and their head pops up, bang!
**[14:52] Hinata**
But if I'm noticed, they might be
able to pop smoke and get away...
**[14:56] Hinata**
Can I really nail them with a single shot?
**[14:59] Hinata**
I wonder what would be best...
**[15:05] Hinata**
I've got it!
**[15:07] Hinata**
This is too much of a pain!
**[15:08] Hinata**
I'm going to get in close and
go for the kill with grenades!
**[15:11] Hinata**
Time to turn that horsey
bastard into horse sashimi!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[15:21] Hinata**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[15:29] Shiro**
Oh, it's Futaba-chan! Welcome!
**[15:33] 2ba**
Oh, I am so fed up...
**[15:36] 2ba**
Can I get some trivia about names, please?
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[15:45] Shiro**
Names.
**[15:46] Shiro**
There's a lot of locations around the world
**[15:48] Shiro**
with names that sound like
Japanese homophones.
**[15:51] Shiro**
Like the tourist town in Argentina,
**[15:53] Shiro**
whose name sounds like
"Maru de aho" or "like an idiot,"
**[15:56] Shiro**
but it's Mar de Ajó,
which means sea of garlic!
**[15:59] Shiro**
There's a mountain in Indonesia
named "Baka" like stupid,
**[16:03] Shiro**
but in Indonesian, baka can
mean eternity or family.
**[16:08] Shiro**
There's also a famous example
that's a little exciting,
**[16:12] Shiro**
the nation of Vanuatu has
an island called Erromango,
**[16:15] Shiro**
but it means "humans" in the local
language, and not sexy comics!
**[16:19] Shiro**
When you think about how baka
can mean eternity and family,
**[16:22] Shiro**
and how ero manga can mean human,
**[16:26] Shiro**
it really makes you realize how versatile
language can be, doesn't it?
**[16:31] Futaba**
Wow, really?
**[16:34] Futaba**
Your trivia is always so handy, Shiro-chan.
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[16:40] Koko**
Living life in a daze...
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Torimochi Koko
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:43] Koko**
I'm from Virtual Cast!
**[16:47] Koko**
And my name is Torimochi Koko.
**[16:50] Koko**
Okay?
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[16:54] Mito**
This feeling... I've got chills again.
**[17:05] Mito**
Mugi-chan! Please quiet down!
**[17:06] Mito**
You're going to rupture my eardrums!
**[17:08] Mugi**
I'm sorry Class Prez.
**[17:10] Mugi**
I'm just so scared when I'm alone...
**[17:11] Mito**
Well I'm sorry for scaring you,
**[17:14] Mito**
but it's time to do the the ultimate
"Would you rather" committee.
**[17:16] Mugi**
Right.
**[17:16] Mito**
Here's our subject for today!
**[17:18] Mito**
Which would you rather lose the
use of for the rest of your life?
**[17:22] Mito**
A) Z characters
**[17:23] Mito**
B) P characters
**[17:24] Mugi**
I'm not sure I understand, Class Prez.
**[17:27] Mito**
Basically would you rather lose all the
Japanese words that use za ji zu ze zo,
**[17:30] Mito**
or pa pi pu pe po.
**[17:31] Mugi**
I see!
**[17:33] Mugi**
Well I don't really say party
hard or panties or pisser,
**[17:36] Mugi**
so I guess I could do without the Ps.
**[17:38] Mito**
Those are some fairly
crass words, I suppose.
**[17:41] Mugi**
I think so.
**[17:42] Mito**
But you wouldn't be able to say pirika
pirilala poporina peperuto anymore.
**[17:46] Mugi**
That's a little before my time...
**[17:48] Mugi**
For my generation, the transformation
phrase is "Metamorphose!"
**[17:52] Mito**
Oh, I see. So I'd be the
one who couldn't use that.
**[17:55] Mugi**
Right.
**[17:56] Mito**
But I have a plan in mind.
**[17:58] Mito**
See, you just need to become a gal.
**[17:59] Mugi**
Become a gal?
**[18:00] Mito**
See, when you write out how a gal speaks,
**[18:02] Mito**
instead of putting the dots
next to the character for shi,
**[18:03] Mito**
you put it next to the ones for chi.
**[18:05] Mugi**
I see!
**[18:06] Mito**
That being the case...
**[18:08] Mito**
OMG Mugi Mugi, I just can't
even with school tomorrow.
**[18:11] Mugi**
I just can't even, too.
**[18:12] Mito**
We're bffs, right?
**[18:13] Mugi**
W-We are?
**[18:14] Mito**
Total besties, amirite?
**[18:15] Mugi**
Besties?
**[18:17] Mito**
See how that works?
**[18:17] Mugi**
I see... not exactly dignified, though.
**[18:20] Mito**
OMG it's like 3 RN,
**[18:22] Mito**
wasn't sure, at first, but it's totes the Zs.
**[18:28] Mito**
So, like, us virtual youtubers
are totes bffs forever!
**[18:33] Mugi**
Senpai, that idea was wicked pissah! Party hard!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[18:41] Toya**
Virtual-san is looking.
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[18:44] Unity**
Unity-chan.
**[18:46] Hinata**
*From pen name, King of Kings.*
**[18:48] Everybody**
*Thanks for writing!*
**[18:50] Hinata**
*"I have a question for you all."*
**[18:52] Hinata**
* "If you were the kings of a country,*
* what kind of nation would you build?"*
**[18:58] Hinata**
*He asks.*
***SIGN*** If you were king, what would
your kingdom be like?
**[18:59] Hina**
*Good question!*
**[19:00] Akari**
* If I was royalty, I'd want to make*
* a law where wherever I go out—*
**[19:02] Unity**
Fear not!
**[19:03] Unity**
For I am the king...
**[19:09] Unity**
Croquettes... yummy...
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:20] Uma**
I hope I finally get to
say this today, Sister.
**[19:22] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:24] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:24] Uma**
About a year ago—
**[19:30] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:31] Sora**
When I go to bed, the ticking of the seconds
hand bothers me and I can't sleep.
**[19:34] Sora**
I'm worried I'll never get enough rest...
**[19:37] Sister**
I see. Have you tried listening
to some music you enjoy?
**[19:41] Sora**
I tried, but it still bothered me.
**[19:43] Sister**
Well in that case, maybe you
could keep a tiger in your room,
**[19:46] Sister**
so that you have more pressing concerns
than the ticking of a clock.
**[19:49] Sora**
I get you! That'd definitely
be more worrying.
**[19:51] Sora**
But wouldn't I get eaten?
**[19:54] Sister**
That is a risk, yes.
**[19:56] Sora**
I don't wanna, then!
**[19:57] Sister**
Then you may have to resort
to desperate measures.
**[20:00] Sora**
Desperate measures?
**[20:02] Sister**
Switching to a digital clock!
**[20:04] Sora**
I didn't think of that!
**[20:05] Sora**
I'm gonna get plenty of rest tonight!
Thank you, Sister!
**[20:08] Uma**
Shouldn't that have been
what you tried first?!
**[20:10] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:14] Uma**
At the time of the scream, it will be 12:00.
**[20:21] Uma**
Sister!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:27] Unity**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[20:29] Unity**
Yeah!
**[20:31] Hime**
Okay, I've got a letter here from
pen name, Festival Wasshoi-san!
**[20:36] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:39] Hime**
"Of all the events at school,
I love the culture fest the most."
**[20:43] Hime**
"If you were going to put on
a virtual culture festival,
**[20:46] Hime**
what kind of attractions would you have?"
***SIGN*** What would you do for a
virtual culture festival?
**[20:49] Akari**
Oh, me, me, me!
**[20:49] Hime**
What is it?
**[20:50] Akari**
Let's see, I'd have a big
skirt flipping contest!
**[20:53] Shiro**
Beep, beep! Beep, beep!
**[20:54] Akari**
You get like giant fan or something,
and kick up a huge breeze,
**[20:57] Akari**
and the girls skirts all
go flapping in the wind!
**[21:00] Mito**
That runs the risk of getting classified as
a certain type of business, so let's not!
**[21:03] Shiro**
Oh, I've got one, here!
**[21:05] Hime**
Sure, what is it?
**[21:05] Shiro**
You know how humans tend to end
their culture festivals with a big bonfire?
**[21:10] Shiro**
And how cleaning up after an event
is always a lot of work?
**[21:15] Shiro**
So what you do when you're done
**[21:16] Shiro**
is throw everything into the fire,
including the attendees,
**[21:19] Shiro**
and it'll all be nice and clean!
**[21:19] Mito**
What you're describing
is kind of terrifying...
**[21:20] Akari**
It's a kebab festival!
***SIGN*** The suggestions continued to be dangerous,
so we're forcing this segment to a close.
**[21:28] Hime**
Okay, and that does it for this week!
**[21:30] Hime**
So until next time,
**[21:32] All**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:13] Pino**
Good day to you. I'm Karuro Pino.
***SIGN*** Karuro Pino
***SIGN*** Kagura Suzu
**[23:15] Suzu**
Good afternoon, Kagura Suzu here.
**[23:17] Pino**
Say, Suzu-oneechan, would you
like to play insect shiritori?
**[23:19] Suzu**
Insect shiritori? What do you mean?
**[23:21] Pino**
You just play shiritori with the name of bugs.
**[23:23] Suzu**
Bug names?
**[23:24] Pino**
Here we go! Cricket!
**[23:25] Suzu**
Are— Are we really just starting?
**[23:28] Pino**
Yes we are!
**[23:30] Suzu**
T... Termite!
**[23:31] Pino**
E... Earwig!
**[23:32] Suzu**
I'm already uncomfortable with this!
**[23:34] Pino**
Next time is "Granny."
***SIGN*** Next Time: "Granny"
**[23:35] Suzu**
And next week,
**[23:36] Both**
Virtual-san will be looking!
# E11 - Granny
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYZJM7E4R/granny)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] Peanut**
They say that most polar
bears are left-handed.
**[00:06] Uma**
Hey, hey...
**[00:09] Peanut**
You bastard!
**[00:14] Shiro**
We who are virtual must always be refined.
***SIGN*** Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
**[00:18] Mito**
Ah, yes, the "refinement first" mindset!
**[00:21] Shiro**
Yes!
**[00:21] Shiro**
And I believe today is a good day to
teach everyone about being refined.
**[00:27] Mito**
You can't just try and
be dignified, of course.
**[00:29] Mito**
You have to really follow through!
**[00:30] Mito**
Siro-san, if you'd offer an example.
**[00:33] Shiro**
I intend to become an idol,
**[00:34] Shiro**
and also have total dominion over
the human race's internal organs!
**[00:38] Everyone**
Now that's refined!
**[00:39] Akari**
Super re-fine fine fine!
**[00:43] Hime**
I want to see Mito-sama do an example too!
**[00:47] Hinata**
Careful now! This is
going to be really refined.
**[00:49] Mito**
Uh...
**[00:50] Hina**
Social media is going to be
blowing up with #refined today!
**[00:55] Mito**
Hang on, everyone.
**[00:56] Mito**
I get the feeling you're really
expecting a lot from me here.
**[00:59] Shiro**
Now, let's get a glimpse of
how refined Mito-sama is.
**[01:02] Everyone**
Three!
**[01:03] Mito**
A countdown?!
**[01:03] Everyone**
Two!
**[01:04] Everyone**
One!
**[01:05] Everyone**
Go!
**[01:08] Mito**
The latest and greatest...
**[01:10] Mito**
Transcendentally, splendiferously
refined class president!
**[01:13] Mito**
The woman who loves,
and is loved by, refinement—
***SIGN*** We apologize for this unsightly display of refinement.
**[01:19] Shiro**
Well, let's put what we learned
in today's lesson to use!
**[01:23] Shiro**
Ready, and...
**[01:25] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:12] Elu**
Virtual-san is looking, elu elu.
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 5
**[03:19] Shiro**
It's a giant Siro!
**[03:21] Hime**
Where did it come from?!
**[03:24] Mito**
I think I understand what's going on.
**[03:26] Mito**
Could it be that this world is your...
**[03:33] Mob D**
Hold it!
**[03:37] Mob D**
Remove them! By force!
**[03:40] Akari**
In public, during broad daylight? We can't!
**[03:43] Mito**
Again, I'm not sure what you're imagining!
**[03:47] Mob D**
You need to hand them over!
***SIGN*** Mob D
**[03:51] Robo**
I... can't do that!
**[03:53] Mob D**
Then we'll remove you by force, too!
**[03:56] Mob D**
Remove by force!
**[03:58] Mob D**
Remove by force!
**[03:59] Mob D**
Remove by force!
**[04:01] Akari**
What do we do?
**[04:02] Mito**
We'll just have to watch over him.
**[04:05] Mito**
This is an important battle,
one that can't be avoided.
**[04:10] Shiro**
But at this rate, he'll...
**[04:14] Mito**
He's the one who will determine
whether or not this world can change.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
**[04:26] Shiro**
I thought we were done for!
**[04:28] Shiro**
It's such a relief to be alive!
**[04:30] Akari**
Hey, do you guys want to do a barbecue?
**[04:33] Akari**
While the weather's still cold!
**[04:34] Hina**
Meat! Yes!
**[04:36] Hime**
I'm in! I'm ready to eat!
**[04:38] Hinata**
Me too!
**[04:39] Mito**
I get the feeling this group
is all eaters and no cooks.
**[04:42] Shiro**
Hey, if you were going to bring one thing
to the barbecue, what would it be?
**[04:47] Hime**
Meat buns!
**[04:47] Akari**
Ginkgo nuts, ginkgo nuts!
Ginkgo nuts, ginkgo nuts!
**[04:54] Akari**
That scared me!
**[04:56] Akari**
What was that shaking—
**[04:57] Akari**
Hey, look outside!
**[05:00] Everyone**
Magma?!
**[05:02] Shiro**
Are we on a volcano again?!
**[05:04] Hina**
No, we're even closer to one this time!
**[05:08] Mito**
You're right, the bottom of
my feet feel really hot!
**[05:10] Mito**
Like we're being cooked from below!
**[05:13] Hina**
Hot, hot!
**[05:13] Hina**
Great, looks like we're gonna
be served at the barbecue!
**[05:17] Hinata**
But I like eating, not being eaten!
**[05:21] Akari**
Oh, fine, then... I'll just have to
eat you up then, Hinata-chan!
**[05:30] Mito**
Everyone, calm down.
**[05:32] Mito**
I think we're basically done for.
**[05:34] Mito**
No sense in fighting it.
**[05:36] Mito**
Let's all get in some proper
last words before we pass on.
**[05:38] Mito**
If you'd start us off, Akari-san.
**[05:40] Akari**
Right.
**[05:40] Akari**
Hear me well...
**[05:42] Akari**
Don't you ever stop!
**[05:44] Hina**
What next?
**[05:46] Mito**
If you'd go ahead, Siro-san.
**[05:48] Siro**
Horse, thank you for everything.
**[05:52] Mito**
Hime-san, you're up.
**[05:54] Hime**
In my next life... I'll be the
number one chuckling dumpling!
**[05:58] Akari**
You're the only one of those.
**[05:59] Mito**
Very much so.
**[06:01] Mito**
Go ahead, Hina-san.
**[06:03] Hina**
Make sure to dunk my computer in the tub.
**[06:07] Akari**
That's a good idea! A really good idea!
**[06:09] Mito**
You're next, Hinata-san.
**[06:11] Hinata**
I have no regrets about the life I have lived!
**[06:15] Everyone**
So cool!
**[06:17] Mito**
I'll go ahead and wrap it up, then.
**[06:19] Mito**
Uh, thank you for having us here,
**[06:22] Mito**
on this wonderful occasion on
a clear, but magma-filled, day.
**[06:25] Mito**
It's said that there are three
types of sanctity in life, which...
**[06:28] Hime**
Too long!
**[06:29] Shiro**
I don't know what it is,
but I'm starting to feel good!
**[06:34] Hinata**
Something about sinking
into magma like this...
**[06:37] Hinata**
It reminds me of that movie.
**[06:41] Hime**
In that case, let's end it with that line!
**[06:43] Hime**
Ready, and...
**[06:44] Everyone**
I'll be back!
**[06:55] Sora**
Let's say it together!
**[06:57] Sora**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[07:02] Uma**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[07:04] Uma**
And so am I.
**[07:12] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:13] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:14] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:15] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:16] Gori**
It's a monkey!
***SIGN*** A... monkey?
**[07:20] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:21] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:22] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:23] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:24] Gori**
On a southern island!
***SIGN*** Does he mean South Africa?
**[07:27] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:28] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:29] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:30] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:31] Gori**
With the long tail!
***SIGN*** A tail...?
**[07:35] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:36] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:37] Gori**
Hello, hello!
**[07:38] Aoi**
Hello, hello!
**[07:39] Gori**
There was a monkey!
**[07:43] Aoi**
Dude, you've got it wrong.
**[07:44] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[07:47] Gori**
Hello.
**[07:50] Mito**
Big trouble, big trouble!
***SIGN*** Big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[07:55] Mito**
Akari-chan, there's really big trouble!
**[08:05] Akari**
What is it, Mito-chan?
**[08:06] Mito**
Akari-san, we've got really big trouble!
**[08:08] Akari**
Don't cry! What is it? What's wrong?
**[08:11] Mito**
Someone with the pen name "Manami-chan,
**[08:13] Mito**
a.k.a. Omana," is worried about something!
**[08:14] Akari**
Omana!
**[08:15] Mito**
Please, read this.
**[08:16] Akari**
Got it. Omana, huh? Okay.
**[08:18] Akari**
"Akari-san, hello."
**[08:19] Mito**
Hello.
**[08:20] Akari**
H'lo!
**[08:21] Akari**
I'm in my second year of
college and looking for jobs,
**[08:23] Akari**
but during interviews,
I always get too nervous to talk.
**[08:24] Mito**
Right, right, right.
**[08:24] Akari**
Please, tell me how to stay
cool in important situations!
**[08:32] Mito**
Well, I'm a high schools student, butts...
***SIGN*** Problem: How to not get nervous
during important moments?
**[08:35] Mito**
I mean, a high school student, but—
**[08:36] Akari**
High school student butts!
**[08:38] Mito**
A high school student, however!
**[08:39] Akari**
Yeah?
**[08:40] Mito**
However, since I've been lucky enough
to be in assorted big productions,
**[08:44] Mito**
I understand how she feels!
**[08:45] Akari**
Oh, yeah, it's easy to get nervous.
**[08:46] Mito**
Especially with interviews.
**[08:48] Akari**
Let's see, a way to not get nervous in
critical situations, so you can act normal...
**[08:52] Akari**
What would be the trick?
**[08:57] Mito**
Oh, Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
**[09:01] Yami**
No need to be nervous.
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[09:03] Yami**
Nobody doing an interview is
gonna be worth a damn anyway.
**[09:06] Hikari**
That's not true!
**[09:09] Hikari**
I'm sure that if they're doing the interviews,
they have to be important!
**[09:13] Yami**
That kind of naïve crap is why people
get choked up in the first place.
**[09:18] Yami**
Just mess around on your
phone and answer casually.
**[09:22] Hikari**
There's no way you'd get
a job with that attitude!
**[09:27] Yami**
Well... I don't care!
**[09:31] Hikari**
No good... Akari, you take it from here!
**[09:35] Mito**
Hello? Mirai-san! Mirai-san?!
**[09:39] Akari**
Sorry, I'm back.
**[09:41] Mito**
Welcome back.
**[09:43] Akari**
Pen name Manami-chan! Here's the bottom line!
**[09:47] Mito**
She's going to expose it!
Her firm bottom line!
**[09:51] Akari**
You need to go to a toy store!
**[09:54] Akari**
The best thing to do when you're
nervous is to focus on a simple task.
**[09:59] Mito**
I see.
**[10:00] Akari**
Apparently, if you talk while doing a
jigsaw puzzle, you'll naturally be less tense!
**[10:04] Mito**
I see!
**[10:05] Mito**
You're dividing your attention, essentially.
**[10:07] Akari**
Right!
**[10:08] Akari**
So Manami-chan should head to a
toy store and buy a Rubik's Cube!
**[10:14] Akari**
Then she should practice
with it a bunch at home!
**[10:16] Akari**
Until she can solve it in five minutes!
**[10:18] Akari**
Then, when it's time for
the interview, she says this:
**[10:21] Akari**
"I've got a talent for solving Rubik's Cubes.
**[10:24] Akari**
I'm going to solve this one
before this interview is over."
**[10:27] Mito**
Is that a good idea?!
**[10:29] Akari**
Then she focuses on the Rubik's Cube!
**[10:31] Akari**
There's a time limit, after all.
**[10:32] Mito**
But she has to answer the
interview questions, too.
**[10:35] Akari**
It'll be fine!
**[10:36] Mito**
"Is there anything you're
focused on at the moment?"
**[10:41] Akari**
"Getting this red side sorted, I'd say."
**[10:44] Mito**
That's not the point of the question!
**[10:46] Akari**
But did you notice, Mito-chan?
**[10:48] Akari**
Wasn't nervous at all, was I?
**[10:50] Mito**
Y-You're right!
**[10:52] Akari**
And then once she solves
it like she said, it'll be like,
**[10:56] Akari**
"She can really deliver on what she says!"
**[10:58] Akari**
Talk about leaving a positive impression!
**[11:01] Mito**
Not getting nervous and passing the interview!
Two birds with one stone!
**[11:05] Akari**
Now all that's left is to
practice with a Rubik's Cube!
**[11:08] Mito**
Oh, right, right.
**[11:09] Mito**
Someone else is going to
bring the letter by next week!
**[11:12] Akari**
This is your last time, Mito-chan?
**[11:13] Mito**
Yes!
**[11:14] Akari**
I'll miss you! Let me give you a lick!
**[11:16] Mito**
If you'll excuse me!
**[11:17] Akari**
Bye-bye!
**[11:18] Mito**
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[11:30] Hime**
This is finally the last one!
**[11:33] Hime**
Augh, it's the old maid!
**[11:38] Hinata**
Looks like I win!
**[11:39] Hinata**
There!
**[11:40] Hinata**
It's the old maid!
**[11:44] Hime**
It seems that God wants me to win.
**[11:47] Hime**
That one!
**[11:49] Hime**
It's the old maid again!
**[11:51] Hinata**
This is quite a battle.
**[11:53] Hinata**
But... this will be the end!
**[11:56] Hinata**
I win—again?!
**[11:59] Hinata**
I'm getting tired of this.
**[12:02] Hime**
This joker sure does turn up a lot!
**[12:06] Hime**
Not again!
**[12:09] Hinata**
I don't wanna run into the old maid again.
**[12:13] Mito**
You two are going to be late!
**[12:15] Both**
The old maid!
**[12:16] Mito**
Who the hell are you calling an old maid?!
**[12:19] Hime & Other Hina**
Run for it!
**[12:20] Mito**
Get back here, you two!
**[12:22] Mito**
Hold it right there!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[12:29] Hime & Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[12:38] Shiro**
Oh, it's Hinata-chan! Welcome!
**[12:41] Kaede**
I am so fed up!
**[12:44] Kaede**
Can I get some trivia about trips, please?
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[12:53] Shiro**
You know, trips can also
be a type of internet lingo.
**[12:56] Shiro**
There's the famous message board, 2channel,
**[13:00] Shiro**
where all the posts are anonymous by default,
**[13:03] Shiro**
so that people can write whatever they
want without worrying about prying eyes.
**[13:06] Shiro**
But sometimes if you're making a string
of posts, you don't want to give a name,
**[13:11] Shiro**
but you want people to know it's the same
person responsible for previous posts!
**[13:16] Shiro**
You get what I mean, right, Hinata-chan?
**[13:18] Shiro**
For times like that,
**[13:19] Shiro**
you can get a string of random characters
that will indicate who made the post!
**[13:25] Shiro**
It's called a tripcode or "trip"!
**[13:29] Shiro**
By the way, 2channel has now
changed its name to 5channel.
**[13:36] Hinata**
Wow, really?
**[13:39] Hinata**
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-chan!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[13:48] Mito**
I wonder who's here this week?
**[13:55] Elu**
Oh, Mito-san, I've been waiting!
**[13:58] Mito**
Huh? And you are?
**[13:59] Elu**
I-it's me, Elu!
**[14:00] Mito**
Right.
**[14:01] Mito**
Okay, Elu-san, let's get started on the
ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[14:04] Mito**
Here is today's especially ultimate choice!
**[14:08] Mito**
Let's say you can only respond
to questions one way from now on.
**[14:10] Mito**
Which would you prefer?
**[14:12] Mito**
A) Yes. B) No.
**[14:14] Elu**
So you either become a yes man for life,
or someone who always says no.
**[14:17] Elu**
That is pretty ultimate.
**[14:18] Mito**
Which do you pick?
**[14:19] Elu**
I'd go with "yes."
**[14:20] Mito**
But why?
**[14:21] Elu**
I mean, I'd rather be the kind of
person who says "yes" than "no."
**[14:25] Elu**
Doesn't that just give a more
positive impression overall?
**[14:26] Mito**
It does seem more friendly, indeed.
**[14:28] Elu**
Right?
**[14:29] Elu**
I'm kind of self-conscious
about that sort of thing.
**[14:31] Mito**
Oh, Elu-chan, would you carry my bags?
**[14:33] Elu**
Oh, sure.
**[14:34] Mito**
And can I break your finger?
**[14:36] Elu**
Uh... okay.
**[14:38] Mito**
You just agreed, so I'm gonna do it, okay?
**[14:40] Elu**
Oh boy, that's... maybe I
should change my answer.
**[14:40] Mito**
Just you wait.
**[14:43] Mito**
Really?
**[14:44] Elu**
But y'know, there's something kind of
standoffish about only ever saying no.
**[14:47] Mito**
Ah, but you see, I've got
a plan to counteract that.
**[14:50] Elu**
What, really?
**[14:51] Elu**
Okay, I'll ask some questions.
**[14:52] Mito**
Okay.
**[14:53] Elu**
Mito-Mito-chan, you want to
treat me to sushi today?
**[14:57] Mito**
Nope.
**[14:58] Mito**
But I'm kind of hungry, so...
**[15:01] Mito**
I guess I could go, maybe.
**[15:06] Elu**
Well, you and I are good friends, right?
**[15:09] Mito**
Nope.
**[15:11] Mito**
But I've got an opening in my friend roster.
**[15:14] Mito**
So I guess I could fit you in, maybe...
**[15:17] Elu**
So the trick is to become a tsundere.
**[15:18] Mito**
Exactly, all you need to do is act tsundere.
**[15:20] Elu**
That's actually pretty slick.
**[15:21] Mito**
And time's up!
**[15:23] Mito**
It was fuzzy for a moment,
but the correct answer is "no"!
**[15:27] Elu**
Yeah, I'm actually convinced.
**[15:29] Mito**
That's right!
**[15:30] Mito**
Tsundere is on the verge of passing from the
lexicon, so let's prop it up aggressively!
**[15:37] Kerin**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[15:39] Kerin**
Let's blow it up!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[15:42] Unity**
Unity-chan!
**[15:45] Unity**
Here they come!
**[15:48] Unity**
There!
**[15:50] Unity**
Take that!
**[15:51] Unity**
Piece of cake!
**[15:56] Unity**
There you are! This time,
I'm getting that rare drop!
**[16:00] Unity**
Mega magic!
**[16:02] Unity**
Ultimate Croquette Power Kick!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Yosshuchan
***SIGN*** We want to see your characters!
Check out the *Virtualsan - Looking*
official website for details!
**[16:14] Yossuh**
Hello there. So, the other
day I was at the pub,
**[16:17] Yossuh**
and these people were making a ton of noise,
**[16:18] Yossuh**
and I couldn't take it anymore,
**[16:20] Yossuh**
so I let them have it!
**[16:21] Yossuh**
Like, "Do you want some of these edamame?"
**[16:22] Yossuh**
What did you think I meant
by letting them have it?
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
**[16:30] Everybody**
Harutrash Sword!
**[16:32] Everybody**
We're getting blown away!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[16:38] Hina**
Hey, what are we doing
in a big city like this?
**[16:42] Hime**
It's been a few years since Kerin disappeared,
**[16:44] Hime**
but I got a tip that he's living in this city.
**[16:47] Hina**
The dark elf who lives in the
woods of Gunma... in the city?
**[16:50] Hime**
Yep, yep! I know how it sounds.
**[16:52] Hime**
I think he should be around here, somewhere.
**[16:56] Hina**
Kerin!
**[16:57] Hime**
Yo! How you been?
**[16:59] Kerin**
Who are you people?
**[17:01] Hime**
You forgot about us?!
**[17:03] Hime**
We used to shoot missiles and
magic around, trying to kill each other!
**[17:08] Hina**
That's right!
**[17:10] Hina**
You always got the short end of the stick,
**[17:12] Hina**
but your ballistics and
Himehina were pretty close!
**[17:15] Hime**
Yep.
**[17:15] Kerin**
Oh, you two...
**[17:17] Kerin**
I don't even feel like
starting anything anymore.
**[17:21] Hime**
You reek of booze!
**[17:22] Hina**
Kerin, what happened to you?
**[17:24] Kerin**
Oh, me?
**[17:26] Kerin**
I wanted to polish myself...
**[17:28] Kerin**
for when I would meet Elu-san again,
so I came to the city.
**[17:32] Kerin**
And it beat me.
**[17:34] Hina**
But how?
**[17:37] Hina**
What were you doing here?
**[17:39] Kerin**
I was a small-time host.
**[17:41] Kerin**
I figured if I became number one,
then Elu-san might notice me.
**[17:45] Kerin**
So I brushed myself off, and worked hard.
**[17:48] Kerin**
But I was never able to beat that horse guy.
***SIGN*** Virtual
**[17:52] Kerin**
People would always request him.
**[17:55] Kerin**
Kept saying he was cute,
trying to confess to the sister...
**[17:58] Hime**
So you couldn't win, quit being a host,
and became a drunk.
**[18:03] Hime**
That's not the Kerin I know!
I'm so disappointed in you!
**[18:06] Hime**
What happened to all your energy?!
**[18:08] Hime**
Shoot a few missiles at us or something!
**[18:12] Kerin**
You keep talking...
**[18:14] Kerin**
Did you really think I didn't
do anything else in this city?
**[18:18] Kerin**
Fine, then... I'll show you!
**[18:20] Kerin**
Too late to change your mind!
**[18:22] Hina**
Th-This might be bad...
**[18:24] Hina**
I can sense an intense night energy!
**[18:26] Kerin**
Super Mega Liquor Magic!
**[18:29] Kerin**
Buchichamp de'Oom!
***SIGN*** Buchichamp de'Oom
**[18:30] Kerin**
Time to drink the night away!
**[18:33] Hina**
That's total host magic!
**[18:35] Hina**
If that thing hits us we're going
to get drunk and have hangovers!
**[18:39] Hina**
We're underage, though! This is a bad matchup!
**[18:42] Hina**
We need to deflect it, Hime!
**[18:43] Hime**
Okay! Ready, and...
**[18:45] Hime**
Ukon Shield!
***SIGN*** Ukon
***SIGN*** Shield
**[18:50] Mito**
The latest and greatest...
**[18:52] Kerin**
What is this?!
**[18:54] Hime**
It... It can't be...
**[18:55] Hina**
That looks like...
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[19:07] Uma**
Please! I need to talk to you today, Sister.
**[19:10] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[19:12] Sora**
Listen, Sister!
**[19:12] Uma**
Well the thing is—
**[19:19] Sister**
What is it?
**[19:20] Sora**
People from Kansai always say
"but I dunno" after everything, right?
**[19:23] Sister**
Some certainly do.
**[19:25] Sora**
So do they know? Or not? Which is it?!
**[19:28] Sister**
What makes you ask that, Sora-san?
**[19:30] Sora**
I asked a friend of mine
from Kansai questions.
**[19:32] Sora**
I got a really serious answer,
and at first I was impressed.
**[19:35] Sora**
But then at the end there
was a "but I dunno"! So I told her!
**[19:40] Sora**
"Make up yer friggin' mind!"
**[19:42] Sister**
Oh my, now you've got the accent, too.
**[19:45] Sister**
But Sora-san, they're not trying to
avoid responsibility by saying that.
**[19:49] Sora**
Really?
**[19:50] Sister**
They're trying to impart to you that
it's only their personal opinion,
**[19:52] Sister**
and that they have no
hard basis for their claims,
**[19:55] Sister**
so that you should probably
look into the issue more seriously.
**[19:57] Sora**
I get it!
**[19:58] Sora**
I better apologize to my
friend I snapped at, then!
**[20:03] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[20:05] Uma**
"But I dunno" is a type of politeness!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[20:11] Sister**
God bless you.
**[20:14] Sister**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[20:17] Hina**
Okay, we've got a letter here, everybody!
**[20:20] Hina**
It's from someone with
the pen name "Hello, everyone!"
**[20:23] Everyone**
Thanks for writing!
**[20:26] Hina**
"Lately, I've fallen down a VTuber hole!"
**[20:29] Hina**
"Are there any newer VTubers you would
recommend to a neophyte like me?"
**[20:34] Hina**
It says!
**[20:35] Akari**
Oh, oh, me!
**[20:36] Akari**
Well, do you guys know...
**[20:39] Akari**
There's this one called "Mirai Akari."
**[20:41] Shiro**
Never heard of him.
**[20:41] Mito**
Doesn't ring a bell.
***SIGN*** This is going to run long, so we'll have the
six of them each recommend a VTuber
**[20:48] Akari**
I'd say Pinky Pop Hepburn-chan!
***SIGN*** Mirai Akari's
Recommended VTuber
Pinky Pop
Hepburn
***SIGN*** Big Boobs (?)
***SIGN*** Cyber Girl Siro's
Recommended VTuber
Unity-chan
**[20:53] Shiro**
I'd say Unity-chan!
**[20:58] Hime**
I want to introduce
people to Ginga Alice-chan!
***SIGN*** Tanaka Hime's
Recommended VTuber
Ginga Alice
***SIGN*** Invading Alien
***SIGN*** Suzuki Hina's
Recommended VTuber
Tomari Mari
**[21:04] Hina**
I'm actually really into a guy who reincarnated
as Tomari Mari-chan, at the moment.
***SIGN*** A Reincarnated Guy
**[21:08] Hinata**
Do you guys know Kafu-chan?
***SIGN*** Nekomiya Hinata's
Recommended VTuber
Kafu
***SIGN*** Studying for Exams!
**[21:11] Everbody**
Oh, yeah!
**[21:13] Mito**
I recommend Marie Android.
***SIGN*** Tsukino Mito's
Recommended VTuber
Marie Android
***SIGN*** Her Eyes Are Wide Open
**[21:16] Mito**
Her eyes are always really wide open.
**[21:19] Hina**
Well, pen name "Hello, everybody!"
**[21:20] Hina**
I hope you take a look at the
VTubers we recommended today
**[21:24] Hina**
and fall down a whole bunch of new holes!
**[21:27] Hina**
And so, until next week,
**[21:29] Hina**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[23:09] Omega Sisters**
Hey, hey, hey there! Everybody feeling Omega?!
***SIGN*** Omega Sisters
**[23:12] Rei**
I'm Omega Rei!
**[23:12] Rio**
And I'm Omega Rio!
**[23:13] Rei**
We're here to do the next episode preview
for the finale of *Virtual-san - Looking*.
**[23:19] Rio**
Wow, amazing.
**[23:20] Rei**
Next time is the finale!
The last episode, Rio.
**[23:22] Rio**
The last one!
**[23:24] Rio**
But they didn't tell us what happens,
so we can't tell you anything!
**[23:27] Rei**
Yeah.
**[23:27] Rio**
Right?
**[23:28] Rei**
Y'know, this title reminds me of something.
**[23:30] Rio**
You're not supposed to point out the parodies!
**[23:32] Rei**
Ah, it'll be fine.
**[23:33] Rio**
Yeah, I think so. Sure.
**[23:34] Both**
Next time is
"The Disappearance of Virtual-san."
***SIGN*** Next Time
"The Disappearance of Virtual-san"
**[23:36] Both**
And Virtual-san will be
looking next week, too!
# E12 - The Disappearance of Virtual-san
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6QWEKJ36/the-disappearance-of-virtual-san)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Peanut**
Today's the final episode!
**[00:03] Uma**
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Anything you wanna say in the end?
**[00:05] Peanut**
Thanks for the last three months!
**[00:07] Uma**
There's another episode
on the Blu-rays, too!
**[00:09] Peanut**
You're gonna advertise now?!
You horsey bastard!
***SIGN*** Virtual Real
Was Looking
Final Episode
**[00:15] Mito**
He's the one who will determine whether
or not this world can change.
**[00:25] Hinata**
Bye-bye.
**[00:31] Hina**
That new world...
**[00:33] Hime**
I wish we could've seen it.
**[00:38] Shiro**
Thank you for trying so hard.
**[00:42] Mito**
We will never forget you.
**[00:51] Akari**
But I'm sure that...
**[00:58] All**
You can do it!
**[01:05] Giant Mob**
What the—?!
**[01:14] Robo**
What is this? What's going on?
**[01:17] Hime**
All right!
**[01:18] Hinata**
Good work!
**[01:20] Hina**
I knew you could pull it off!
**[01:22] Akari**
All right, let's do this!
**[01:24] Mito**
Please, listen to this!
**[01:25] Shiro**
It's our...
**[01:26] Shiro**
Virtual Real song!
**[03:17] Hikari**
Virtual-san is looking!
**[03:22] Call**
Virtual Grandmother!
**[03:26] Granny**
Idaten bashiri.
***SIGN*** Grandma
***SIGN*** Today's Phrase
Idaten Bashiri
**[03:28] Granny**
That's the phrase.
**[03:31] Granny**
It has a simple meaning, which
is to run a great distance.
**[03:35] Granny**
But there are limits to what
human limbs can manage.
**[03:38] Granny**
And as a result, humanity came
across the idea of transportation.
**[03:43] Granny**
And among them all, the Shinkansen,
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[03:47] Granny**
which started operating in 1964,
might be the most amazing.
**[03:51] Granny**
Then you have automobiles, which grew into
a type of vehicle that anyone can use,
**[03:55] Granny**
and the completion of the
high-speed roadways in 1965.
**[04:00] Granny**
As for me, I got my license
right away when I turned 20.
**[04:04] Granny**
And I just couldn't get enough of driving!
**[04:07] Granny**
Back then, the toll was 100 yen,
regardless of where you used it.
**[04:10] Granny**
I used to drive down the highway
a lot by myself in those days.
**[04:14] Granny**
I just enjoyed the act of driving.
**[04:18] Granny**
I can still move, too! Look at this!
Impressive, isn't it?
**[04:22] Granny**
I can even drive while doing backflips.
**[04:25] Granny**
Because I'm virtual, you see,
I can do anything!
**[04:31] Granny**
Now this is idaten bashiri!
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[04:40] Subaru**
I'm Subaru Ingram, an incubus.
***SIGN*** Pen Name: Subaru Ingram
***SIGN*** Everyone's
Virtual-san
**[04:45] Subaru**
I might look like a girl,
**[04:48] Subaru**
but I really am a boy!
**[04:56] Shiro**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[05:00] Hinata**
Hey, Virtual-san is looking.
**[05:06] Gori**
Aoi-san, here we have a button.
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:09] Aoi**
Right.
**[05:10] Gori**
And if you press it,
you'll get a hundred million yen.
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:13] Aoi**
Right.
**[05:13] Gori**
But in exchange,
Fuji Aoi Park will be destroyed.
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:17] Aoi**
Okay.
**[05:18] Gori**
Would you press that button? Or...
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:25] Gori**
Wait, but... destruction?
***SIGN*** 100 Million
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:28] Aoi**
Okay!
**[05:30] Aoi**
That oughta be good for a billion, I think.
**[05:31] Gori**
I suppose so...
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:32] Aoi**
Okay, time to grab something tasty to eat!
**[05:35] Aoi**
The bananas are on me!
***SIGN*** 100 Million
**[05:36] Gori**
Only bananas?
**[05:37] Aoi**
Fuji Aoi!
***SIGN*** Fuji Aoi Park
**[05:39] Gori**
Hello.
**[05:42] Hinata**
Big trouble, big trouble!
**[05:44] Hinata**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[05:47] Hinata**
Real big trouble, Akari-chan!
**[05:55] Akari**
Hinata! So it's your turn. What's up?
**[06:00] Hinata**
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
**[06:03] Akari**
And what's that?
**[06:05] Hinata**
Someone with the pen name
"Rocky-kun" is in trouble.
**[06:07] Hinata**
Here, check it out.
**[06:09] Akari**
Okay. Let's see, "Hello Akari-san."
**[06:11] Hinata**
Hello.
**[06:12] Akari**
H'lo!
**[06:13] Akari**
"I have a YouTube channel, but I don't
stand out, and it's really difficult."
***SIGN*** [Advice] Here me out
**[06:18] Akari**
"How can I develop the kind of
quirk that would make it
**[06:21] Akari**
so that anyone would remember
me after a single video?"
**[06:23] Hinata**
I get how he feels.
***SIGN*** Problem: How can I
be memorable?
**[06:25] Akari**
Y'know, even we had trouble with this.
**[06:27] Hinata**
Everyone worries about it.
**[06:31] Akari**
What to do...?
**[06:33] Hinata**
Huh? Mirai-san?
**[06:35] Hinata**
Mirai-san!
***SIGN*** Hikari
***SIGN*** Yami
**[06:38] Yami**
You just need to be provocative!
**[06:41] Hikari**
Like drinking a whole cola at once?
**[06:44] Yami**
How the hell does that provoke anyone?!
**[06:46] Yami**
You need something with sex and violence,
or no one will care!
**[06:50] Hikari**
Oh, no!
**[06:51] Hikari**
If you do that, you're bound to get
complaints from all over the place!
**[06:56] Yami**
The squeaky wheel gets the grease!
**[06:58] Yami**
That's part of standing out.
**[07:01] Hikari**
That might be true, but...
**[07:03] Hikari**
I'm sorry, Akari, you have to handle this!
**[07:08] Hinata**
Hello! Mirai-san?
**[07:11] Akari**
Oh, sorry about that.
**[07:13] Akari**
I almost fell asleep.
**[07:15] Hinata**
Good morning, then!
**[07:16] Akari**
Morning!
**[07:18] Akari**
Pen name Rocky-kun! Here's the bottom line!
**[07:23] Hinata**
Is this finally it? Her bottom... line?
**[07:27] Akari**
You need to be from the future!
**[07:30] Akari**
I mean, there's no one from
the future who's a YouTuber!
**[07:33] Akari**
Someone like that would know
the winning lotto numbers
**[07:35] Akari**
and which horses would win their races!
**[07:38] Akari**
That's one heck of a gimmick!
**[07:40] Hinata**
Okay, okay, okay.
**[07:42] Akari**
"Something shocking will happen
to the world in a year..."
**[07:45] Akari**
"Oh, but if I say any more,
it'll alter the timeline!"
**[07:48] Akari**
You say stuff like that and
your views will blow up!
**[07:52] Hinata**
I can see why, but y'know,
**[07:55] Hinata**
I think it'd be impossible to get away
with claiming to be from the future.
**[07:58] Akari**
Impossible, she says! You never know!
**[08:02] Akari**
In another few decades,
there might be time machines!
**[08:05] Hinata**
Y-You've got a point! That might happen!
**[08:07] Akari**
Which is why if Rocky-kun
waits until he's a grandpa,
**[08:11] Akari**
I'm sure he'll be able to make his
debut as the YouTuber from future!
**[08:14] Hinata**
But when it actually gets to be that era,
**[08:17] Hinata**
everyone else might hop into time machines
to become YouTubers from the future, too.
**[08:25] Akari**
When that happens, uh...
**[08:29] Akari**
He can dye his hair blond!
**[08:30] Hinata**
H-How unique!
**[08:32] Akari**
So focus on keeping your hair until the
time machine is ready in the meantime!
**[08:37] Hinata**
I see!
**[08:44] Hinata**
A blond YouTuber from the future!
***SIGN*** Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[09:03] Hinata**
This is bad.
**[09:06] Hinata**
I can see a man at the end of this road.
**[09:08] Hinata**
And in front of him is a little girl.
**[09:10] Hinata**
If he's some kind of old creep...
**[09:13] Hinata**
Should I toss a grenade before
that girl gets traumatized?
**[09:16] Hinata**
No, she could get caught in the blast.
**[09:19] Hinata**
And a SMG wouldn't be accurate
at this distance.
**[09:23] Hinata**
I think I'd better pop
smoke to conceal that guy,
**[09:26] Hinata**
and then have the girl
evacuate in the meantime.
**[09:33] Girl**
Papa!
**[09:35] Hinata**
I almost slaughtered her old man!
***SIGN*** Hinata-chan Heads to
School
**[09:42] Hina**
Yo, yo, yo! Virtual-san is looking!
Yo, yo, yo!
***SIGN*** Trivia
Diner
**[09:51] Shiro**
Oh, it's Virtual-san... Welcome!
**[09:55] Uma**
I am so fed up!
**[09:58] Uma**
Can I get some trivia about horses, please?
***SIGN*** Trivia, go!
**[10:05] Shiro**
Horses...
**[10:06] Shiro**
Y'know, the part of horses that
seems like it would be knee
**[10:09] Shiro**
is actually more comparable
to the human wrist,
**[10:11] Shiro**
which means what looks like a shin is really
a middle finger pointing down all the time.
**[10:15] Shiro**
And their hooves are sort of like something
**[10:18] Shiro**
that evolved out of their middle fingernail.
**[10:21] Shiro**
Horses also have incredible eyes.
**[10:25] Shiro**
It's said that humans have a
200 degree range of vision,
**[10:28] Shiro**
but horses can see a range up to 350 degrees!
**[10:32] Shiro**
If you try to play, "Guess who?"
with them, they'll see you coming!
**[10:36] Shiro**
By the way, the saying
"has blinders on" comes from horses
**[10:39] Shiro**
who were only allowed to see
what was in front of them,
**[10:44] Shiro**
and means that you're focused on a single
thing, to the exclusion of everything else.
**[10:50] Shiro**
I wish there was a horse I knew who
could work like he had blinders on.
**[10:58] Virtual**
Wow, really?
**[11:01] Virtual**
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-chan!
**[11:04] Shiro**
Stop flipping me off.
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[11:09] Mito**
I sent her that picture of protein,
but will she actually show up?
***SIGN*** Shizurin appeared!
**[11:16] Rin**
Mito-san!
**[11:18] Rin**
Is it true there are ripped gentlemen
enthusiastically enjoying protein here?!
**[11:22] Mito**
Shizurin-senpai, you're dumber than I thought.
**[11:24] Mito**
All we have here is the protein.
**[11:26] Mito**
God damn!
**[11:29] Mito**
Now then, Shizurin-senpai, it's time for
our ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
**[11:33] Rin**
Again?
**[11:35] Mito**
Here's our subject for today!
**[11:37] Mito**
If you had to pick, which would you prefer?
**[11:39] Mito**
A) Spend an entire day hunched over,
**[11:41] Mito**
B) Spend an entire day
standing on your toes.
**[11:42] ---**
Standing on my toes...
**[11:44] ---**
Yes.
**[11:44] Rin**
I'd rather not do either,
but I guess I'd pick tiptoes.
**[11:49] Mito**
Oh, I was thinking of saying that, too.
**[11:51] Rin**
That's fine, isn't it? We can match, then.
**[11:52] Mito**
No, no, the segment would end in that case!
**[11:53] Rin**
Nice and tidy!
**[11:54] Mito**
Let's try it to see for sure.
**[11:56] Mito**
I'll stand on my tiptoes,
**[11:58] Mito**
and Shizurin-senpai will hunch over,
and we'll converse about something!
**[12:00] Rin**
That's unfair. Totally unfair, but...
**[12:02] Mito**
This is really killing my calves, though.
**[12:05] Rin**
But imagine having to spend
a whole day like this.
**[12:07] Mito**
Good point.
**[12:09] Rin**
Let's trade! I'll stand on my tip toes.
**[12:11] Mito**
No, no, wouldn't that mean
I'd have to hunch over?
**[12:13] Rin**
Right, exactly.
**[12:14] Mito**
I'm afraid that I can't,
for religious reasons.
**[12:16] Rin**
What religion is that?!
**[12:18] Rin**
If you're a real entertainer,
you need to try it out!
**[12:22] Mito**
Don't blame me if this goes badly, then.
**[12:23] Rin**
Stoop! Stoop!
**[12:26] Rin**
You know what, never mind! Never mind!
**[12:27] Mito**
I figured as much! Now, you see.
**[12:29] Rin**
I had to cover that up.
**[12:31] Mito**
When I hunch over, it's really
quite a sight, let me tell you!
**[12:34] Rin**
That was scary.
**[12:35] Mito**
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
**[12:37] Mito**
That means our result is...
**[12:39] Mito**
B, spending all day on your tiptoes!
**[12:42] Rin**
Aw, no, come on, I really
don't want to do that, either!
**[12:46] Mito**
If you want to be a real VTuber,
**[12:47] Mito**
you need to know what you
are and aren't capable of!
***SIGN*** It's 3 PM,
Class President.
**[12:54] Hime**
Virtual-san is looking!
***SIGN*** Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
**[13:04] Unity**
I think I burned through five curry
croquettes' worth of calories!
**[13:07] Unity**
But I know you've got
them ready, don't you?!
**[13:10] Unity**
Come on, curry croquettes!
**[13:14] Unity**
There's so many!
**[13:19] Unity**
Lots and lots!
**[13:24] Unity**
Huh? A dream ending?
***SIGN*** Previously on Kerin Slayer.
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer.
**[13:40] Kerin**
Wh-Who are you supposed to be?!
**[13:42] Mito**
Where's that bubbly at?
**[13:43] Hina**
Mito-chan?!
**[13:44] Mito**
Tanaka, Hina, I've come to rescue you two!
**[13:47] Hime**
Wh-Wh-What's going on here, Mitonator?!
**[13:50] Mito**
If the two of you are hit
with Buchichamp de'Oom,
**[13:52] Mito**
you'll develop an addiction
to hosts and go bankrupt.
**[13:54] Mito**
That's the kind of future that awaits.
**[13:55] Hina**
What the heck? That's scary.
**[13:57] Mito**
I've come from the future to
prevent that from happening.
**[14:00] Hime & Hina**
M-Mitonator-sama!
**[14:03] Kerin**
Cut all the jibber-jabber!
**[14:05] Kerin**
You wasted all my Chandon.
**[14:07] Mito**
Silence!
**[14:08] Mito**
The real problem here is that you've
become a washed-up drunkard!
**[14:12] Kerin**
Y'know, booze... the thing with booze!
**[14:15] Kerin**
It's the only friend I have!
**[14:17] Kerin**
I'm gonna drink and drink
until it drinks me up!
***SIGN*** Buchichamp de'Oom
**[14:21] Mito**
What kind of vulgar sorcery is this?!
**[14:23] Hina**
Mito-chan, get clear!
**[14:24] Mito**
No, I can deal with this with my own magic!
**[14:28] Mito**
Selphshield!
**[14:30] Hime**
That's the most advanced type
of barrier magic, Selphshield!
**[14:34] Mitoshield**
The refined class prez!
**[14:36] Kerin**
Impossible! My Chandon!
**[14:38] Kerin**
All the work I've done since
coming to the city...
**[14:41] Kerin**
If it's come to this...
I'll use Buchitema.
**[14:43] Hina**
Wait, Kerin!
**[14:44] Hina**
She knows Elu-san, y'know!
**[14:46] Kerin**
Elu...san?!
**[14:48] Mito**
Oh, you want to see Elu-san?
**[14:50] Kerin**
I can... see her?
**[14:52] Mito**
I see. This might actually be good medicine
to cure your sorry state of affairs.
**[14:56] Mito**
Tanaka, Hina-san, could the two
of you lend me your strength?
**[14:59] Mito**
We'll call Elu-san here!
**[15:01] Hime**
We're going to use that
ultimate spell, right!
**[15:03] Hina**
Okay! You got it!
**[15:05] Mito**
To our elf, who art in Heaven.
**[15:07] Mito**
By your blessing, let our foolish comrade
who has fallen to evil be saved.
**[15:12] Hime & Hina**
Super Ultimate Mega Summoning,
Elu-Elu Essaim!
**[15:16] Hime & Hina**
Hao!
**[15:22] Elu**
Chomp, chomp, chomp...
**[15:23] Elu**
I was eating dinner.
**[15:25] Elu**
Hi everybody, Elu here!
**[15:28] Hime**
Did we interrupt a meal?
**[15:30] Kerin**
Elu-san!
**[15:31] Kerin**
So big!
**[15:32] Kerin**
A giant Elu-san!
**[15:34] Mito**
Elu-san, sorry to trouble
you during your dinner,
**[15:36] Mito**
but could you purify this fellow?
**[15:38] Elu**
Well, my food's gonna get cold!
**[15:41] Elu**
But leave it to Elu!
**[15:43] Hina**
She's so mellow!
**[15:44] Kerin**
P-Purify?! Don't be ridiculous!
**[15:47] Kerin**
I've become a part of this city.
My heart's been stained black.
**[15:50] Elu**
Kerin-san! I'm gonna blow you away!
**[15:54] Elu**
Ultimate purifying magic, Mesareru!
**[16:00] Kerin**
A warm light...
**[16:01] Elu**
It's okay now. I'm sure you're tired.
**[16:04] Elu**
You tried your best!
**[16:06] Elu**
Munch, munch, munch...
**[16:07] Mito**
Elu-san, please focus on the purification!
**[16:12] Elu**
Anyway, hurry up and be purified!
**[16:14] Kerin**
Elu-san—!
**[16:20] Kerin**
No! Not there—!
**[16:24] Hina**
Kerin vanished!
**[16:25] Elu**
I sent him to Heaven!
**[16:27] Elu**
Now if you don't mind,
I'm getting back to dinner!
**[16:30] Elu**
Bye-bye!
**[16:31] Mito**
That about does it, I'd say.
**[16:33] Hina**
Gotta say, the city can be a scary place.
**[16:35] Mito**
Indeed.
**[16:36] Mito**
But since we're all here, Tanaka, Hina-san,
**[16:40] Mito**
why don't we try one of
those champagne towers?
**[16:42] Hime**
Sounds good!
**[16:44] Hime**
I wanna stack the glasses!
**[16:46] Hina**
Mito-chan, you've got a chant, right?
**[16:48] Mito**
You wanna hear it? Do you?
You ready? Should I?
**[16:49] Mito**
Ready, set, go!
**[16:52] Mito**
Even in a world that's purely virtual!
**[16:55] Mito**
Your love is real!
**[16:57] Mito**
And right now, right here, we'll prove it!
**[16:59] Mito**
Real money doesn't lie! One order
of Buchichamp de'Oom, coming up!
**[17:03] Hime & Hina**
Thank you very much!
**[17:07] Kerin**
Elu-san, I'm on my way!
***SIGN*** Kerin Slayer
***SIGN*** The End
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[17:18] Uma**
Sister, please hear me out.
**[17:20] Sister**
What is it, dear horse?
**[17:22] Uma**
Well, you see...
**[17:25] Uma**
Is this happening? I can do it!
**[17:27] Uma**
Please, listen, sister!
**[17:28] Sister**
What is it?
**[17:30] Uma**
I... I...
**[17:32] Uma**
Huh?
**[17:33] Sister**
What's the matter?
**[17:35] Uma**
After being knocked aside 11 times,
I've forgotten my confession.
**[17:39] Sister**
Oh, dear.
**[17:40] Sora**
I'm gonna blow him away!
**[17:42] Uma**
My inability to confess when the time is
right is almost like my own coughbtl—
**[17:52] Sora**
Listen, sister!
**[17:53] Sister**
What is it?
**[17:54] Sora**
I need some advice on something.
**[17:56] Sister**
How can I help?
**[17:58] Sora**
I can't think of anything else to confess!
**[18:00] Uma**
Then what are you doing here?!
**[18:01] Sister**
Is that it?
**[18:03] Sister**
If nothing weighs upon your conscience,
that is a good thing.
**[18:07] Sora**
But if I've got nothing to confess,
I can't come and see you.
**[18:11] Sister**
I am always here, so you can
come and see me when you like.
**[18:15] Sora**
Thank you, sister!
**[18:18] Sister**
May you be virtually blessed.
**[18:20] Uma**
I remember! I remembered
my confession! Sister—!
***SIGN*** Sister!
**[18:29] Mito**
Virtual-san is looking.
**[18:41] Akari**
Himehina! Whatcha doing?
**[18:43] Hime**
Everyone! Hao!
**[18:45] Akari**
Hello!
**[18:46] Shiro**
Sup, supo!
**[18:46] Hinata**
Hi!
**[18:46] Mito**
Good day.
**[18:48] Hina**
Since the weather's nice,
we were doing dance practice.
**[18:51] Mito**
I see. What an energetic finale it'll be!
**[18:53] Hinata**
Already the last episode, huh?
It's been fun.
**[18:57] Shiro**
I know, we should thank everyone
who stuck around to the end!
**[19:02] Everyone**
Good idea!
**[19:03] Mito**
Well said, Siro-san!
**[19:08] Akari**
To everybody who watched these three months!
**[19:11] Akari**
Thank you very much!
**[19:13] Shiro**
We're really grateful for all the
messages of support we received!
**[19:17] Hime**
It'd be great if even more Virtual-sans
could be in anime in the future!
**[19:22] Hina**
You can look forward to seeing the evolution
of virtual anime from here on out!
**[19:26] Hinata**
And this is farewell until we meet again.
**[19:30] Mito**
And this message goes out to you,
who might be lonely!
**[19:32] Mito**
Here we go.
**[19:33] Mito**
It's okay!
**[21:16] Akari**
Here we go!
**[21:17] Akari**
"The Walking Free Directory!"
**[21:19] Hina**
Can I bring you home with me tonight?
**[21:22] Shiro**
Okey-dokey!
**[21:23] Shiro**
Sharpening a knife...
**[21:24] Hina**
Who you supposed to be?
**[21:26] Hina**
Winter, for you, hot water for stew!
**[21:28] Hinata**
I wouldn't say that!
**[21:30] Mito**
The latest and greatest...
**[21:32] Mito**
Transcendentally—
**[22:58] Akari**
Ready, and...
**[22:59] Akari**
Virtual-san is looking!