Season 1
- E1 - Untitled
- E3 - Untitled
- E4 - Untitled
- E5 - Untitled
- E6 - PP Dance Festival
- E7 - I'm Salty
- E8 - White Tears
- E9 - Transmigration of an Old Lady's Soul
- E10 - Letting Your Horse Carry You Whenever
- E11 - Granny
- E12 - The Disappearance of Virtual-san
E1 - Untitled
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Uma
This is Virtual Town.
[00:04] Uma
I'm Uma.
[00:06] Uma
A humanoid horse.
[00:07] Uma
Or maybe an equine human?
[00:08] Uma
Either way, I'm a horse that talks a lot.
[00:11] Uma
In this virtual world, there are
lots of special people like me.
[00:15] Uma
For example, there's a
peanut that talks a lot,
[00:17] Uma
a guy who pretends to be a beautiful girl,
[00:19] Uma
and this dude who's always
shooting off missiles.
[00:20] Uma
Grandmas, gorillas, raccoon dog
ninjas, Hello **** and a st****—
[00:24] Uma
Actually, I had better leave it at
that, before we get in trouble.
[00:28] Uma
Yep!
[00:30] Uma
And right now, passing in
front of us, is Mirai Akari.
SIGN Mirai Akari
[00:34] Uma
She's a sexy, upbeat older girl who's
constantly sexually harassing her juniors.
[00:38] Akari
Puberty, yeah!
[00:41] Uma
This is Cyber Girl Siro.
SIGN Cyber Girl Siro
[00:43] Uma
She is not the crazy psychopathic
combat AI, Siro Iruka.
[00:47] Uma
An intensely cute, classy idol.
[00:50] Siro
Oh boy, fresh prey!
[00:54] Narration
The girl with the strange walk is the
red half of HIMEHINA, Tanaka Hime.
SIGN Tanaka Hime
[00:58] Narration
A chortling girl who never stops talking.
[01:00] Hime
Time for the rumbly crab shuffle!
[01:05] Uma
On her tail is the girl with the
slightly sexy exposed midriff...
SIGN Suzuki Hina
[01:09] Uma
The blue half of HIMEHINA, Suzuki Hina.
[01:12] Hina
Hime! You're flashing your panties!
Cover that up!
[01:14] ---
There's broadcast standards!
[01:16] Hinata
Ow...
[01:17] Uma
The one who just fell right now is
the low-energy tomboy, Nekomiya Hinata.
SIGN Nekomiya Hinata
[01:21] Uma
She has first rate skill at shooters,
but her tank top is super loose.
[01:26] Hinata
That really hurt... but I've
got video games waiting for me.
[01:31] Uma
Last up is the class president
with long, black hair, Tsukino Mito.
SIGN Tsukino Mito
[01:34] Uma
She often tries to show her
superiority to all of Virtual Town,
[01:38] Uma
but unfortunately, she's a total small fry.
[01:39] Mito
Now, everyone, you mustn't run like that.
[01:41] Mito
You must elegantly walk like I do,
with your knees knocked. Like this!
[01:47] Uma
Looks like it's going to be another
fun day in the virtual world today!
[01:51] Uma
Yep!
[01:56] Akari
Okay girls, gather around!
SIGN Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
[01:58] Akari
Meeting time!
[01:59] Akari
We've got a meeting!
[02:00] Hinata
A meeting?
[02:02] Hime
What kind of meeting?
Where we show off our underwear?
[02:04] Akari
No, Tanaka!
[02:05] Shiro
I know! I bet it's a meeting where
Akari-chan shares her lust with all of us!
[02:10] Hime
That's great!
[02:12] Akari & Hina
Would that be great?
[02:13] Mito
It's true that in the virtual world I am
treated as the classiest of the classy,
[02:16] Mito
in respect for my overwhelming classiness,
[02:19] Mito
but if by interacting with
the incarnation of libido
[02:21] ---
that is Akari-san, I can develop more...
[02:22] Mito
Then I can hardly see how a love scene
or two wouldn't be worth the cost—
[02:25] Hime
It's true that in the virtual world,
I am treated as the leggiest of the leggy,
[02:28] ---
in respect for my overwhelming legginess,
[02:31] Hime
so interacting with the incarnation of libido
that is Akari-san isn't the worst thing.
[02:34] Shiro
It's true that in the virtual world
I am treated as the queen of killers,
[02:37] ---
in respect for my overwhelming
skill at murder—
[02:39] Akari
Oh, never mind, then!
[02:41] Akari
Look, I get it, everybody,
but let's calm down.
[02:43] Akari
Because I actually have a huge announcement!
[02:46] Akari
It turns out that we're...
[02:48] Shiro
Oh, is this about the anime?
[02:49] Hina
Oh, I heard about that.
[02:51] Hinata
Akari-chan, you're lagging real bad.
[02:52] Hime
Seriously, we're already on the air.
See, the camera's over there, right?
[02:55] Mito
Hello, everyone! Are you watching?
[02:56] Hina
Hey, I think it's almost time!
[02:58] Shiro
Oh, already?
[02:59] Shiro
Gather around, gather around!
[03:00] Hime
Go, go!
[03:01] Girls
Okay, okay, okay!
[03:02] Girls
Hang on, hang on!
[03:04] Shiro
Okay, here we go!
[03:05] Shiro
Ready and...
[03:07] All
Virtual-san is looking!
[04:52] Akari
V-V-V-V...
[04:54] Akari
Virtual-san is looking!
[05:08] Haruto
It is a time of inter-galactic
war in the virtual world.
[05:11] Haruto
We will invade other virtual nations,
[05:13] Haruto
and in time, unify the galaxy...
[05:14] Haruto
Under our Game Club Empire!
[05:17] Miria
Shut it, Harutrash!
[05:18] Miria
Or do you want to go out the airlock?
[05:19] Haruto
Do you want me to kill you, pink fool?
[05:21] Chief
Okay you two, no fighting!
[05:23] Ryo
Chief, are we really going to try and
conquer the galaxy like Haru-kun says?
[05:27] Chief
Yep! We have to improve our ratings
in different virtual nations
[05:30] ---
so that we can rise to the top!
[05:32] Ryo
Wow, ratings still apply here?
[05:33] Miria
Hey Kaede-chan, I came up with a plan!
[05:36] Chief
Well, what is it? Tell me!
[05:37] Miria
I call it "The Titanic Game
Club Conquers the Galaxy!"
SIGN The Titanic Game Club
Conquers the Galaxy
[05:41] Ryo
It's the direct approach where we become
titans who overwhelm our enemies, right?
[05:45] Haruto
I see you understand something, pink fool!
[05:47] Haruto
Power is everything!
[05:48] Haruto
With enough power,
your enemies will never outdo you!
[05:51] Chief
How do we become titans, though?
[05:52] Miria
I found out the other day!
[05:54] Miria
Apparently in space, if you bite your
own thumb, you can turn into a titan!
[05:59] Haruto
To think it was so simple!
[06:01] Haruto
Then let's begin!
[06:04] Haruto
I actually grew!
[06:06] Chief
I'll do it, too!
[06:09] Ryo
I wonder if it'll work for me!
[06:11] Ryo
I grew!
[06:12] Miria
You all did it!
[06:14] Miria
I had better go, too!
[06:15] Voice
Congratulations to you.
[06:16] Miria
Right, this is how it worked last time.
[06:18] Chief
Looks like we're all set to go.
[06:20] Chief
Time to invade some enemy nations!
[06:22] Narration
Thank you for riding with us.
[06:22] Haruto
What?!
[06:23] Haruto
Something's happening to my body...
[06:25] Chief
Huh? Why'd you all shrink?
[06:27] Chief
Is this treachery?!
[06:28] Miria
That's weird. I think it must be hereditary.
[06:31] Miria
You have good genetics, Kaede-chan!
[06:33] Chief
How could you all be so mean
and leave me like this?!
[06:36] Miria
Kaede-chan!
[06:37] Voice
Congratulations to you.
[06:38] Ryo
Miria-chan!
[06:39] Haruto
Pink fool!
[06:41] Chief
I don't want to be stuck like this!
I want to turn back!
[06:45] Ryo
Chief, wait a second—
[06:46] Voice
Congratulations to you.
[06:48] Haruto
Impossible... To obliterate
us after a mere two blows...
[06:51] Haruto
Ch-Chief, calm down for a second.
[06:53] Chief
They're all gone... You want to
be with them, don't you, Haruto?
[06:56] Haruto
S-Stop, please! Stay away, no!
[06:59] Voice
Happy New Year.
[07:02] Chief
Everybody's gone...
[07:03] Chief
The road to the Game Club's
conquest is still a long one.
[07:13] All
Virtual Grandmother!
[07:17] Granny
Ryugen Higo.
SIGN Grandma
SIGN Ryugen
Higo
[07:19] Granny
It's a term for baseless rumors.
[07:22] Granny
It naturally refers to rumors that are
being spread that have no basis in reality.
SIGN Grandma
[07:30] Granny
In 1973, there was a toilet paper panic.
SIGN Grandma
SIGN Ryugen Higo
[07:35] Granny
Because of the oil shock at the time,
[07:37] ---
the government announced there
would be paper rationing.
[07:42] Granny
And because of that, people started to
fear they would run out of toilet paper,
SIGN Grandma
[07:46] ---
and as a result began
buying it up excessively.
[07:51] Granny
At the time, I...
[07:54] ---
had just turned twenty, I think.
SIGN Grandma
[07:59] Granny
You'd go to the bathroom in a department
store or use a public bathroom,
[08:02] ---
and there'd be no toilet paper!
[08:05] Granny
Can you imagine the kind of shock that'd be?
[08:08] Granny
If you went to a public restroom,
[08:11] ---
your only choice would be to
pray-per for paper! Get it?
SIGN "Pray-per for Paper"
[08:14] Granny
Prayer for a square, if you would.
SIGN Grandma
SIGN Ryugen Higo
[08:27] Mito
What is with you?! It's not like virtual-san
is looking all the time, y'know!
SIGN This segment is called
Let's Go! To Class
[08:35] Akari
I wish spring vacation
would get here already.
[08:40] Hime
We just got done with winter vacation!
In a rush much?
[08:43] Shiro
But you always tend to wonder when the next
vacation is after you finish one, don't you?
[08:48] Akari
I know what you mean!
Even if you got plenty of rest!
[08:51] Akari
You still end up wondering
when the next one is.
[08:54] Hinata
It's so easy to start slacking
off during vacation, too.
[08:57] Hina
I'm pretty sure you're always
slacking off, Hinata-chan.
[08:59] Hinata
You're wrong, Hina-chan.
[09:01] Hinata
I'm just practicing for
video games in my head.
[09:03] Mito
Well, during vacation I continue
my proper, disciplined lifestyle,
[09:07] ---
so I never notice much of a change.
[09:08] Hime
The classy life?
[09:10] Mito
Precisely.
[09:10] Shiro
Ah, the sound of class.
[09:12] Akari
That's impressive! Erotic, even!
[09:14] Mito
I-Is it?
[09:15] Mito
I think it's quite normal.
[09:19] Hinata
What? What was that?
[09:21] Akari
What was that shaking?!
And is it suddenly hot—
[09:25] Shiro
Hey, look outside!
[09:26] Shiro
Is that a volcano?
[09:27] Hinata
It's so hot!
[09:29] Hinata
I hate the heat. Can't stand it...
[09:33] Hime
Why's there a volcano outside the classroom?!
[09:35] Hime
The heat's gonna kill us! We better evacuate!
[09:38] Hina
Where do we evacuate?
There's lava everywhere outside!
[09:41] Hina
If we leave the building, we're dead!
[09:43] Akari
What should we do?
[09:46] Akari
Huh? Class Prez?
[09:48] Akari
Do you realize what's going on?!
[09:50] Mito
This is nothing remarkable.
It's no different than every day life.
[09:53] Hime
Uh, no, it's not!
There usually aren't volcanoes!
[09:55] Mito
What are a few volcanoes?
[09:57] Mito
If you watch movies, there are
bound to be volcanoes showing up.
[09:59] Hinata
So hot! Dying!
[10:01] Mito
It's totally normal, if you
think of it as a sauna.
[10:04] Hina
The volcano's erupting!
[10:05] Mito
Well, of course a volcano would erupt!
[10:07] Mito
Honestly, you're all
making far too much fuss.
[10:09] Mito
Just think of this as our usual classroom.
[10:12] Akari
Okay. The usual classroom...
[10:15] Akari
Hello!
[10:16] Akari
Good morning!
[10:16] Others
Good morning!
[10:18] Akari
Let's do our best today again, okay?
[10:21] Akari
Okay, this isn't working!
[10:23] Akari
It's so hot! I'm gonna die!
[10:24] Mito
You can't even manage that, Akari-san?
[10:26] Shiro
Uh, hey... is that... magma headed this way?
[10:30] Mito
That's right, Siro-san, the volcano
exploded and the magma shot forth,
[10:34] ---
so that's only natural.
SIGN I'm gonna bring the heat!
[10:38] Hinata
This is bad! If we don't do something...
[10:41] Hinata
It's gonna hit us! We'll be killed!
[10:42] Mito
Oh, be quiet!
[10:43] Mito
A volcano explodes, shooting magma about,
and it's headed right for us!
[10:47] Mito
Of course we'd die! It's totally normal!
[10:48] Mito
Wait, is it normal to die like that?
[10:50] Mito
N-No, it's not!
[10:51] Mito
No!
[10:52] Peanut
Here it comes!
SIGN To Be Continued
[11:05] Granny
Grandmother is watching.
[11:10] Aoi
One-two, one-two, one-two, one-two...
[11:12] Gori
Hello... Hello... Hello...
[11:16] Aoi
Gori-chan, you've got a
spring in your step today!
[11:18] Gori
Hello!
[11:19] Aoi
Something good happen?
[11:20] Gori
Hello.
[11:21] Aoi
Did you win a lottery?
[11:22] Gori
Hello...
[11:23] Aoi
Did the total at checkout
turn out to be 777 yen?
[11:26] Gori
Hello?
[11:28] Aoi
I know! You lost some weight, right?
[11:30] Aoi
You seem lighter!
[11:31] Gori
Yesterday, I was peeling a banana, right?
Since I'm on a diet.
[11:36] Aoi
Damn, Gori-chan, you're such a lady!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[11:40] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
[11:42] Gori
Hello.
[11:43] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble, Akari-chan!
[11:49] Hime
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[11:53] Akari
What is it, Hime?!
[11:55] Hime
Mirai-san! We've got really big trouble!
[11:57] Akari
What, what is it?!
[11:58] Hime
Someone with the pen name
"Takeru-kun" is in trouble!
[12:01] Hime
Here, read it already!
[12:04] Akari
"Akari-san, hello."
[12:05] Akari
Hello.
[12:06] Akari
"The other day, I had a
meeting with my friend,"
[12:09] Akari
"but I overslept and was an hour late,
and they were furious."
[12:12] Akari
"They haven't talked to me since.
What should I do?"
[12:15] Hime
Such a hot voice!
[12:17] Hime
But y'know, people get so mad when
you oversleep and miss stuff!
[12:20] Akari
You've got a point there.
[12:22] Akari
Maybe he should buy some snacks.
[12:23] Hime
Snacks?!
SIGN Akari MEMO
When you oversleep, bring snacks
[12:24] Hime
A peace offering?
[12:25] Akari
But what kind of snacks should
it be, what would be best?
[12:28] Hime
Maybe bales of rice?
[12:31] Akari
I get it! Just one bale, maybe!
[12:33] Hime
Just one!
[12:34] Akari
But in your case, Takeru, maybe take two.
[12:36] Hime
Good point.
[12:38] Akari
I get it, though.
Takeru-kun wants to make amends.
[12:41] Hime
Yeah, he wants to patch things up.
[12:42] Akari
I wonder what'd be best, then?
[12:45] Hime
Mirai-san?
[12:47] ---
Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[12:49] Hikari
Oh, come on, there's only one real answer!
[12:53] Hikari
Since it was his fault, he should apologize!
[12:56] Yami
Who cares?
[12:58] Yami
What are you getting so
worked up for, Hikari?
[13:00] Hikari
Oh, stop that! Be quiet!
[13:03] Yami
Just ignore them.
[13:04] Hikari
You can't!
[13:05] Hikari
Please, don't say things
that'll only make it worse!
[13:10] Yami
Look, just take him to bed.
[13:12] Hikari
You can't give up your body so freely!
[13:14] Yami
Whatever. You handle it, then, Akari.
[13:16] Hikari
You can do it, Akari!
[13:17] Hime
Hello? Hello?! Mirai-san!
[13:23] Akari
Sorry, I was thinking too hard there!
[13:25] Hime
Well, good morning.
[13:26] Akari
Okay, to pen name Takeru-kun!
Here's the bottom line.
[13:30] Hime
Is this it?! She's going
to show her bottom! Line?
[13:33] Akari
To make up for last time,
you set up another meeting,
[13:36] Akari
and then oversleep by an hour again!
[13:39] Hime
Instead of being on time?!
[13:40] Akari
And then, you suddenly grab your friend when
they're about to angrily leave, from behind!
[13:43] Akari
And be like, "I'm sorry, the sight of
you standing there was just so lovely,
[13:46] ---
I was totally fixated and couldn't move."
Something like that!
[13:49] Hime
That seems really romantic,
but isn't it a little bold?!
SIGN Virtual Kabuki-cho
[13:52] Hime
Is that okay?!
[13:53] Akari
And then, after getting worked up,
[13:55] Akari
the two of them start ****ing and ****ing,
[13:57] Akari
before vanishing into the lights
of late night Kabuki-cho!
[14:00] Hime
How lewd!
[14:01] Akari
Ain't it though, Tanaka?
[14:03] Hime
But it said "friend"! What if it's
one of Takeru-kun's male friends?
[14:11] Hime
Well, that'll do for today!
See you next time!
[14:14] Akari
Come again! Take care!
[14:16] Akari
Next time, I'll actually serve
you something to drink!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[14:26] Hinata
It's almost time for a pork bowl,
[14:28] Hinata
almost time for a pork bowl...
[14:35] Hinata
This is bad.
[14:37] Hinata
It's near the end of the game.
Four survivors, including me.
[14:40] Hinata
From the sound of gunfire, I'm sure there
are two enemies at 1 and 11 o'clock.
[14:44] Hinata
There's a field in the center
of the area with good visibility.
[14:48] Hinata
I can't find the other one, though.
[14:50] Hinata
Is he in that house?
[14:52] Hinata
If I waltz out into the field, I'm going
to come under fire from three directions
[14:57] Hinata
and that'll be the end.
[14:59] Hinata
What do I do?
[15:00] Hinata
I have to think up a way to win!
[15:04] Hinata
I have to...
[15:07] Akari
Hinata!
[15:08] Hinata
I win!
[15:09] Akari
What's wrong?
[15:09] Hinata
Wait, no, not that...
[15:10] Akari
You look really intense.
[15:12] Hinata
A-A pork bowl!
[15:13] Hinata
I wanted to go get a pork bowl.
[15:16] Akari
Oh, I see.
[15:17] Akari
Well, they are yummy, right?
[15:19] Akari
See you!
[15:21] Hinata
See you... yeah.
[15:24] Hinata
Pork bowls are best for lunch.
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[15:29] Kerin
Virtual-san is looking!
[15:31] Kerin
Blow them away!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[15:38] Shiro
Oh, it's Tsukino Mito-chan! Welcome!
[15:41] Mito
I am so fed up!
[15:43] Mito
Can I get some trivia on chocolate?
[15:45] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
SIGN Trivia, go!
[15:51] Shiro
Chocolate!
[15:52] Shiro
They say that Columbus was the first
European to encounter chocolate.
[15:57] Shiro
But at the time chocolate
was just a bitter drink,
[16:00] Shiro
so he apparently had very
little interest in it!
[16:02] Shiro
Chocolate's also supposed to have
various positive health effects,
[16:04] Shiro
with a woman who was 122 before
passing away saying she would
[16:09] ---
eat 900 grams of chocolate a week.
[16:12] Shiro
One other thing, if you eat
chocolate and gum together,
[16:14] Shiro
the cocoa butter will melt the gum,
[16:17] Shiro
so it's generally recommended that
you don't have them together.
[16:22] Mito
Wow, is that true?
[16:24] Mito
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-san.
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
SIGN Pen Name: Tsurumaki Kazuya
[16:32] Lala
My name is Mikurira Lala.
[16:34] Lala
My favorite foods are uncooked
ham and strawberries.
[16:37] Lala
My talents are the vaulting
horse and singing.
[16:41] Lala
It's nice to meet you all!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[16:49] Mito
Now, I wonder who it's going to be today?
[16:55] Mito
You're Kenmochi Rikiya-san, right?
[16:56] Sword
It's Toya!
[16:57] Mito
Sorry, the kanji were so
similar that I got mixed up.
[17:00] Toya
Class Prez, what is this?
Why did you lock me in here?
[17:02] Mito
Silence, Kenmochi-san!
Let's get down to business.
[17:05] Mito
We're now going to begin the
ultimate decision committee.
[17:08] Mito
I wish you the best of luck in
choosing the correct answer.
[17:10] Toya
How bossy can you get?
[17:12] Mito
Here is today's subject!
SIGN Subject: which kind of on-air trouble would you choose, as a streamer?
SIGN A) Your drunken mother interrupts a stream.
SIGN B) The game you were streaming turns out to be BL.
[17:22] Toya
B actually happened to you before, didn't it?
[17:24] Mito
That's right. I thought it
was a simple typing game,
[17:27] ---
and then all of a sudden a very
explicit BL scene appeared.
[17:30] Mito
Now, with that in mind,
which would you prefer?
[17:34] Toya
Good question. I guess I'd pick A,
your drunken mother interrupts a stream.
[17:38] Mito
That one?
[17:39] Mito
The sort of thing that used to
happen regularly with live streams.
[17:43] Toya
Right, and sometimes it actually
made the stream more entertaining.
[17:45] Mito
That kind of thing could often go viral.
[17:47] Toya
Right.
[17:48] Mito
And your drunken mother wouldn't be
likely to get you banned by barging in.
[17:52] Toya
Right. Whereas with the BL game, if it's
explicit enough, you could get banned for it.
[17:56] Mito
Right.
[17:57] Mito
What could a mother do to get
you banned, do you think?
[18:00] Toya
Well, if she's drunk, she could
suddenly start stripping.
[18:04] Mito
Nobody wants to see that.
[18:06] Mito
Oh, well, that's the bell for 3 PM,
so it's time to announce the correct answer.
[18:09] ---
The correct answer is B), the game you
were streaming turns out to be BL!
[18:14] Toya
Was there any point in even
getting my opinion then?
[18:16] Mito
Shut up! That's how I went viral, y'know!
[18:18] Mito
What kinda streamer is worried
about getting banned, anyway?!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[18:23] Shiro
Virtual-san is looking!
[18:26] Shiro
Don't you look, Uma!
[18:29] Sora
There's no stopping now!
Virtual-san is looking!
[18:34] Kohaku
Hey, I'm Otori Kohaku, 17 years old.
[18:39] Kohaku
Everyone calls me Unity-chan.
[18:43] Kohaku
As to why... aw, man!
[18:47] Kohaku
Come on!
[18:49] Kohaku
Stay away!
[18:51] Kohaku
Not the bamboo spear! No, no, no!
[18:56] Kohaku
Aw, man!
[18:59] Kohaku
Huh?
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[19:02] Kohaku
Did I just stream that?
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[19:07] Hina
Hey, Hime, are there really dark
elves in a cave like this?
[19:12] Hime
One of the villagers said he
saw one leaving this cave.
[19:16] Hina
Did you ask Villager B, too?
[19:17] Hime
B was walking into a wall,
so I left him alone.
[19:21] Hina
Well, it'd be dangerous if
they were so close to an town.
[19:25] Hime
Right, so we have to do something about it!
[19:27] Hina
Hime, wait!
[19:29] Hina
There it is!
[19:30] Hime
It's a Keblin!
[19:32] Hina
Dummy! It noticed us!
[19:34] Hime
This is bad!
SIGN For various reasons, we will be
presenting this segment in still images.
Next week, look forward
to the full animated version.
[19:36] Hina
This is really bad!
[19:38] Hina
Ninnomono!
[19:40] Hime
That was amazing, Hina-chan!
[19:41] Hime
How'd you manage that?!
[19:42] Hina
It kinda felt like it'd work out!
[19:44] Hina
Look, there's another one!
[19:46] Hime
Okay...
[19:47] Hime
Nin! Nin!
[19:48] Hina
You suck!
[19:50] Hime
The Keblins are coming!
[19:51] Hina
Let go! Quit trying to take Hime's pants off!
[19:57] Kerin
What are you all doing?!
[19:58] Both
Th-That voice...
[20:02] Kerin
Time to blow it all up!
SIGN See you next week!
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
SIGN Pen Name: Ekaki Makuru
[20:08] Cat
It's me, your wife, Master, Ekaki Makuru.
[20:13] Cat
I want to use my Kamieshi
Power to care for you, Master.
[20:20] Cat
Just kidding!
[20:23] Cat
Bye-bye.
SIGN Sister!
[20:35] Uma
Please, listen, Sister.
[20:36] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[20:38] Uma
There's this girl who I
want to tell how I feel—
[20:39] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[20:41] Sister
What is it?
[20:45] Sora
I did my laundry when there
was some tissue in my pocket,
[20:47] Sora
and my clothes ended up covered in it!
[20:49] Sora
What should I do, Sister?!
[20:51] Sister
At times like that, using the
dryer or some dry fabric softener
[20:57] ---
should make it easier to get the tissue off.
[20:58] Sora
Really?
[21:00] Sister
There's also the option
of using a lint roller,
[21:03] Sister
and on the odd side of things,
[21:04] ---
you can use the nets that produce
are sold in to pick it off.
[21:07] Sister
You can try any of those ways out.
[21:09] Sora
Okay! Thank you!
[21:11] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[21:13] Uma
Sister!
[21:19] Gori
It's an honor. This is
"Virtual-san is looking."
[21:23] Mito
Now, we've got a letter to look at.
[21:25] Mito
This is from pen name "Sleight of Hand,
Slight of Mouth." Thanks for writing.
[21:28] Everyone
Thank you!
[21:31] Mito
"Good evening, everyone. You're all incredibly
beautiful, and very popular online."
[21:35] Mito
"But who among you is the most
popular? Please tell me."
[21:39] Hime
Glad to hear I'm popular!
[21:39] Mito
Well everyone, who do you think it is?
[21:43] Hime
Popular... Who's most popular?
[21:44] Shiro
Well, whoever has the biggest fluffy
melon breads is usually the most popular!
[21:46] Mito
Oh, then who does that make number one?
[21:48] Shiro
Well, we'd have to compare to see.
[21:51] Akari
Okay everyone, step forward.
[21:53] Shiro
Everybody line up.
[21:54] Hime
Oh, no, don't look!
[21:56] Akari
Here we go, show them off!
[21:58] Hime
I'm young! I'm too young,
don't make me do this!
[22:00] Hinata
Have fun, you guys.
[22:02] Mito
So, that settles it.
[22:05] Mito
The most popular member among the
six of us is Cyber Girl Siro.
[22:10] Shiro
Wait, you were just guessing!
[22:12] Mito
I assure you that's not the case!
[22:13] Mito
And now the segment's over!
[22:15] Hina
Wait, guessing what?
[22:17] Mito
Anyway, that's it for this week!
See you next time on...
[22:20] All
Virtual-san is looking!
[23:10] Hiyoko
Good morning!
[23:11] Hiyoko
I'm the Virtual Youtuber who's getting
a second crack at life as a young girl,
SIGN Mochi Hiyoko
[23:14] ---
Mochi Hiyoko.
[23:15] Hiyoko
I'm sure you've all thought about
wanting to be a little girl before.
[23:19] Hiyoko
Well, there's a medicine that can make
that dream come true... right here!
[23:21] Hiyoko
It's a magical medicine that can turn
you into a little girl right away!
[23:25] Hiyoko
I bet everyone would be happy
if we were all little girls!
[23:28] Hiyoko
Everybody, be a little girl!
SIGN Next Time:
"The Legendary Secret Medicine... Oh, I Feel Hot!"
SIGN Next week, virtual-san will still be looking!
E3 - Untitled
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] Hime
Yeah!
[00:00] Mito
Wow, impressive!
[00:00] Mito
Right!
[00:03] Peanut
When a cat is swinging
their tail up and down,
[00:05] Peanut
it's means they want some affection.
[00:06] Uma
Okay, okay, okay, can I get
some affection, too, then?
[00:08] Peanut
Get over here, you goofy horse!
[00:10] Uma
Okie dokie!
[00:13] Shiro
What's wrong, Mito-Mito?
You seem really exhausted.
SIGN Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
[00:17] Mito
I haven't been getting enough sleep lately.
[00:19] Hinata
I get you. It's easy to lose track of
time when you're playing video games.
[00:22] Mito
Not that, Hinata-san! I was
actually practicing something.
[00:25] Hina
Practicing something? Well, what
is it? Now I'm really curious!
[00:27] Mito
Well, you see...
[00:29] Mito
It's a pose to do during
the show's title call.
[00:31] Hime
Wait, what? What are you talking about?
[00:32] Akari
What kind of pose is it?
[00:34] Mito
It's a bit something like...
[00:35] Mito
This!
[00:37] Akari
What the heck?
[00:39] Hime
It's absolutely perfect! Let's use it!
[00:41] Mito
Understood!
[00:43] Mito
All right, let's do it together!
[00:44] Mito
Ready and...
[00:45] All
Virtual-san is looking!
[02:33] Akari
Virtual-san is looking.
[02:47] Ryo
Haru-kun, you're not allowed to
cook up any more weird drugs.
[02:49] Haruto
R-Right. Forgive me.
[02:51] Miria
Did something happen?
[02:53] Haruto
Oh, no...
[02:53] Kaede
Everyone, gather around!
[02:55] Kaede
We need to start getting serious
about our galactic conquest!
[02:58] Kaede
Anyone have any good suggestions?
[02:59] Ryo
About that, Chief...
[03:01] Ryo
While I was repairing our ship, I was able
to accidentally invent an incredible switch!
[03:05] Kaede
What's it do?
[03:06] Ryo
It's a switch that can freeze
it's targets in time!
[03:09] Haruto
What?!
[03:10] Haruto
Of all the myriad powers that exist,
time manipulation may be the strongest!
[03:16] Haruto
Well done, Ryo!
[03:18] Miria
Harutrash shut up for once! Awesome!
[03:20] Kaede
If we use this on our enemies, we can freeze
them in place and invade their territory!
[03:24] Miria
Let me try it!
[03:26] Miria
I wanna mess with Harutrash!
[03:27] Ryo
Pipe down, Miria-chan.
[03:29] Miria
Ryo-kun?
[03:31] Kaede
Is... something wrong, Ryo-kun?
[03:33] Ryo
I've been thinking this for a while now...
[03:35] Ryo
Everyone else in the Game Club is too random!
[03:37] Ryo
I'm the only one thinking seriously
about galactic conquest!
[03:41] Kaede
Calm down, Ryo-kun!
[03:42] Ryo
You understand what I mean, don't you, Chief?
[03:44] Kaede
I do! So just... calm down.
[03:46] ---
And get time moving again for
Miria-chan and Haruto-kun.
[03:49] Kaede
Okay, Ryo-kun?
[03:50] Ryo
Why would you say that?
[03:52] Ryo
Are you uncomfortable, being alone with me?
[03:54] Kaede
Ryo-kun, don't!
[03:56] Ryo
It's time that I teach you, Chief,
[03:57] ---
that this switch's power is enough to grant
someone control over the entire world!
[04:02] Kaede
No—!
[04:04] Ryo
And now I'm the only one left in the world!
I've taken control of time!
[04:10] Ryo
What? Can you see me?
[04:12] Ryo
I asked if you could see me!
[04:16] Ryo
Of all things, Haru-kun has invaded
my world of stopped time...
[04:23] Haruto
Good grief.
[04:25] Haruto
Now I've got the switch!
[04:27] Ryo
Wryyy—
[04:30] Haruto
Now I just need to release them.
[04:32] Haruto
Pink fool, Chief... I'm about to save you!
[04:36] Haruto
Click!
[04:41] Kaede
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
[04:49] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
[04:53] Grandma
Senpen Banka.
SIGN Today's Phrase
Senpen Banka
[04:57] Banner
It means "constantly changing."
[04:59] Banner
It refers to how things can progress
rapidly with the passage of time.
[05:03] Banner
Convenience stores are a good example of
something that has evolved wildly over time.
SIGN Grandma
[05:09] Grandma
The first one in Japan was built in 1974,
in the Toyosu ward of Tokyo.
[05:17] Grandma
The first thing I bought at one was
cup ramen, and it was quite the surprise.
SIGN Grandma
[05:26] Grandma
I was genuinely amazed by how good
it tasted the first time I had some!
[05:31] Grandma
In the old days, it was fashionable
to eat it while standing around!
[05:35] Grandma
Everyone would be in Ginza,
standing around, eating cup ramen.
[05:40] Grandma
You were Inzagay, eating amenray.
SIGN Grandma
[05:44] Grandma
Not ushisay.
[05:47] Grandma
But rather upcay amenray.
[05:50] Grandma
I was abbergastedflay,
it was such a urprisesay!
SIGN That being the case, otay ebay ontinuedcay!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[06:05] Chaco
My name is Chaco!
SIGN Pen Name: Chaco
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[06:07] Chaco
My favorite food is chocolate.
[06:08] Chaco
Which is why my name is Chaco!
[06:11] Chaco
I'm going to work hard, so I can
become famous like the other Vtubers!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[06:20] Mito
I guess Virtual-san is looking.
[06:27] Grandma
Virtual-san is looking.
[06:33] Gori
Aoi-san!
[06:35] Aoi
Hey, it's Gori-chan!
[06:36] Gori
Sorry to startle you.
[06:38] Aoi
That is... a lot of gorillas.
[06:39] Aoi
Whatcha doing?
[06:40] Gori
Picking up girls.
[06:42] Aoi
Picking up girls? How?
[06:44] Gori
Aoi-san, would you like to go pick
up banana shakes in Harajuku?
[06:47] Aoi
Nope.
[06:48] Gori
Aoi-san, would you like to get your
banana fortune read in Harajuku?
[06:50] Aoi
Nope.
[06:51] Gori
Aoi-san...
[06:57] Aoi
Let's go! I'll take take the lead.
[06:59] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[07:01] Gori
Hello.
[07:04] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble Akari-chan!
[07:09] Hime
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[07:14] Akari
What is it, Hime?
[07:16] Hime
Mirai-san! We've got really big trouble!
SIGN They're moving so erratically, the camera is having trouble keeping up
[07:18] Akari
What, what is it?
[07:20] Akari
Scuttle, scuttle!
[07:21] Hime
Someone using the pen name
"Kinokohead-kun" is in trouble!
[07:24] Hime
That's enough waddling around, here, read it!
[07:27] Akari
Okay, sorry.
[07:28] Akari
Let's see... "Akari-chan,
hello." Hello there!
[07:30] Hime
Hello.
[07:32] Akari
"There's a music group that I support
that have a concert coming up."
[07:34] Akari
"And I was able to secure tickets,
[07:36] ---
but it turns out it's the same day
as our baseball club's next game."
[07:39] Akari
"There's no telling what my Senpai might do
to me if I don't show up for the game."
[07:42] Akari
"Is there any way I can resolve this
peacefully and still go to the concert?"
SIGN Problem: The baseball club's game and a concert at the same time
[07:47] Hime
Oh, I can see how he'd want to go!
[07:50] Hime
You'd totally want to go the show!
[07:51] Akari
I know! But he really cares about
the baseball club, too, right?
[07:55] Hime
Yeah, he's a good kid!
[07:56] Akari
He is!
[07:57] Hime
Have you ever had two different
things fall on the same date?
[07:59] Hime
Yeah!
[07:59] Hime
I have, I totally have!
[08:00] Akari
Go ahead!
[08:02] Hime
Well, sometimes Youtubers or Vtubers would
stream at the same time as I was doing one!
[08:08] Akari
Oh, I see, while you were streaming yourself!
[08:11] Hime
Right, right, right!
[08:11] Akari
That totally happens!
[08:12] Hime
And I wanna watch, so, so bad!
[08:13] Akari
I get you, I mean, you can always
watch it once it's archived...
[08:18] Akari
But then you can't make comments!
[08:19] Hime
Exactly!
[08:20] Akari
True enough...
[08:21] Hime
I wanna see it with my own eyes, in real-time!
[08:23] Akari
So what did you end up doing?
[08:25] Hime
Watch the archive!
[08:28] Akari
Aw, look at you! Such a good girl!
[08:30] Hime
Yes! I'm a good girl!
[08:32] Akari
But y'know, I'm sure Kinokohead-kun
is hoping for a way to peacefully
[08:35] ---
skip the game and head to the concert...
[08:40] Hime
Good point!
[08:42] Hime
Mirai-san? Hey, Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[08:46] Yami
Senpai, take my big bat...
[08:47] Hikari
I'm not letting you finish that!
[08:48] Yami
I applaud your speedy response.
[08:50] Hikari
You can do this, Akari!
[08:52] Hime
Hello? Earth to Mirai-san!
[08:56] Akari
Sorry, sorry,
[08:57] Akari
Well, pen name Kinokohead-kun,
I'm gonna get to the bottom line.
[09:02] Hime
Is this it?! She's going
to show her bottom! Line?
[09:06] Akari
First, you wait for the manager of
this artist you like, at their office!
[09:10] Hime
The manager?
[09:11] Akari
Right! And then you hook up with the manager!
[09:13] Hime
What if it's another guy?
[09:15] Akari
You hook up with him.
[09:16] Hime
Wow, how versatile!
[09:17] Akari
And then, you seduce the manager!
[09:19] Hime
Every bit as lewd as I figured!
[09:21] Akari
Then, after seducing the manager,
you seduce your baseball club's coach!
[09:24] Hime
A world of adult relations!
[09:26] Akari
Then, on the day of the big game,
[09:28] Akari
you invite the artist, and have
the concert right before the game!
[09:32] Hime
Hey, that really does cover all the bases!
[09:34] Hime
I've got the perfect thing, then!
Instead of glow sticks,
[09:37] Hime
everybody swings bats around!
[09:38] Hikari
You nailed it!
[09:39] Hime
Okay, I'm gonna go buy eight bats
to stick between my fingers, then!
[09:43] Akari
Wow, you can handle that kind of weight
on your fingers?! Talk about buff!
[09:46] Akari
You must be shredded, Tanaka!
[09:47] Hime
Here I go!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[09:55] Hinata
Huh, was this big empty lot always here?
[09:59] Hinata
I can feel the Gianism!
[10:05] Hinata
Wait, this is bad...
[10:06] Hinata
In a space like this, with no cover,
and no hiding spots,
[10:09] Hinata
if I came in with a blaster,
it's low splat coverage
[10:11] ---
and lack of mobility will make
it hard to secure any territory.
[10:16] Hinata
Should I spam "Come on!"
to call for reinforcements?
[10:19] Hinata
Wait, hang on there! Those pipes are here.
[10:22] Hinata
If I can lure an enemy behind them,
when they've let
[10:24] ---
their guard down behind the cover, I can
nail them with the blaster's splash damage!
[10:29] Hinata
Boom!
[10:30] Hinata
This might work!
[10:31] Hinata
All right! Booyah!
[10:36] Hinata
Maybe I ought to practice with the
blaster every once in a while.
[10:39] Hinata
Bang!
[10:40] Hinata
Bang!
[10:42] Hinata
It's always awesome to see those explosions!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[10:48] Sora
You all are so helpless.
[10:52] Sora
Oh, well.
[10:54] Sora
Virtual-san is looking.
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[11:01] Shiro
Oh, it's Hime-chan, Hina-chan! Welcome!
[11:04] Mime
We are so fed up!
[11:07] Hina
Can we get some trivia about rabbits, please?
[11:10] Hime
Yeah, give it to us!
[11:11] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
[11:16] Shiro
Oh, rabbits!
[11:19] Shiro
They're often considered an icon
of people who hate being alone,
[11:21] Shiro
and there's no shortage of girls
who've said something like,
[11:24] ---
"I'm like a bunny.
I'll die if I'm left alone."
[11:27] Shiro
And when you see individuals on their own,
compared to the ones that live in groups,
[11:30] ---
they seem a bit lonely.
[11:32] Shiro
But apparently, living in colonies makes them
anxious, and they love being on their own!
[11:38] Shiro
If anything, we need to be careful
about cramming more than one into the
[11:42] ---
same cage just because we
imagine them to be lonely.
[11:46] Shiro
Incidentally, the Guinness World Record
for the largest rabbit in the world
[11:50] Shiro
was 1 meter and 32 cm long!
[11:54] Hime
Wow, really?
[11:56] Hina
Your trivia really is
always handy, Siro-chan!
[11:59] Hime
Sure is!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Villager 2
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[12:08] Villager
The whole world finding out
about your preferences!
[12:13] Villager
That's what this corner boils down to.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[12:22] Mito
I wonder who's visiting today?
[12:29] Alice
Hello! Class Prez!
[12:31] Mito
Oh, I see Mononobe Alice
is my guest this week.
[12:33] Alice
I get to have afterschool
tea time with the Class Prez!
[12:36] Mito
You're coming dangerously close to
trademark infringement, Alice-chan!
[12:38] Mito
Let's walk that back!
[12:39] Alice
Okay!
[12:40] Mito
A tea party, eh?
Well, you're not exactly wrong.
[12:45] Mito
Today let's make it an ultimate
decision committee/tea party!
[12:47] Today's Topic
Here is today's topic.
[12:49] ---
Which would you prefer to
be served at a tea party?
[12:52] A
Noni juice.
[12:53] B
Senburicha.
[12:54] Alice
Senburicha... that's a Japanese tea, yes?
[12:57] Mito
Seems like it, right?
[12:58] Alice
And noni juice is juice, not tea!
[13:00] Mito
You are correct.
[13:01] Alice
I had something called aojiru for a
segment once, and it was surprisingly good!
[13:06] Mito
That was supposed to be a penalty for you,
[13:08] Mito
and when you said it was surprisingly good,
you sabotaged the point of you drinking it!
[13:12] Mito
You're supposed to give a big
reaction about how bad it tastes!
[13:15] Alice
I guess so! Sorry!
[13:16] Mito
But that honesty is part of what
people love about you, Alice-chan.
[13:19] Alice
Thank you!
[13:20] Mito
I honestly haven't had noni
juice before, myself...
[13:22] Alice
Oh, I have!
[13:25] Mito
You have?
[13:26] Alice
It had kind of a stingy taste.
[13:29] Mito
That doesn't sound good after all.
[13:31] Mito
But they do say that the worse things taste,
the better they are for you.
[13:34] Mito
Granted, that's a bit of folk wisdom.
[13:36] Mito
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
[13:37] Mito
Alice-chan, since we have both here today,
why don't we drink them to decide?
[13:42] Mito
I'll go with the noni juice.
[13:43] Alice
Then I'll go with B, the Japanese senburicha!
[13:47] Mito
All right, here we go!
[13:48] Mito
Ready and...
[13:50] Mito
What the...
[13:52] Alice
This is better than I thought!
[13:53] Mito
Hey... reactions are supposed to be...
[13:55] Mito
As a streamer...
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[14:01] Shiro
Virtual-san is watching!
[14:04] Shiro
Smash, smash, smash!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[14:07] Unity
Unity-chan...
[14:10] Gori
It's an honor. This is
Virtual-san is looking.
[14:13] Mito
Now, we've got a letter to look at.
[14:15] Unity
Wait. If this show is on...
[14:19] Unity
Today's...
[14:20] ---
Wednesday?!
[14:24] Unity
Oh, crap, I forgot my report!
[14:28] Unity
Why does this happen?!
[14:30] Unity
How does it keep happening?! Man...
[14:34] Unity
Ow.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[14:38] Lily
A good lily afternoon to everyone!
SIGN Pen Name: Amatsuka Liliel
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[14:41] Lily
I'm the angel, Amatsuka Liliel!
[14:44] Lily
I'm training in the human world
to become an archangel some day!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer
[14:55] Elu
Hold it right there.
[14:56] Everybody
Who are you?
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[15:00] Kerin
Elu-san, is that you?
[15:03] Hina
Elu-san? You mean the legendary, beautiful
god elf known throughout the land,
[15:07] Hina
Elu-san the Elf?!
[15:09] Hime
Yeah but I'm pretty sure
she didn't look like that!
[15:12] Hime
She looks kinda pale!
[15:13] Hime
And with really dry skin!
[15:15] Kerin
There's a story behind it all.
[15:16] Hina
There is?
[15:18] Kerin
Fine, then. Since you guys are here,
you might as well take a seat.
[15:20] Hime
Okay, then...
[15:21] Hime
Down we go...
[15:21] Kerin
You too, Keblin.
[15:24] Kerin
See, Elu-san is an elf girl who
came here from another the world.
[15:28] Hime
Yeah, I know!
[15:29] Hime
She's even in the wiki.
[15:32] Kerin
But one day, there was this big disaster.
[15:34] Hina
Disaster?
[15:35] Kerin
It was burned down! Her homeland, the forest.
[15:39] Kerin
The forest... forest...
[15:43] Hina
It was a real tragedy.
[15:44] Hime
You know about it, Hina?
[15:46] Hina
No, I just wanted to say that.
[15:50] Hina
Continue the story.
[15:52] Kerin
Elu-san rushed back to the forest,
but it was already too late.
[15:56] Kerin
The entire place had been scorched,
with her kin burnt to death.
[15:58] Hime
Oh no... that's terrible.
[16:00] Kerin
She was so wrought with grape sor...
[16:02] Kerin
She was so fought with... grave...
[16:07] Kerin
She was so fraught with great sorrow,
Elu-san used all of her life energy
[16:11] Kerin
to cast a spell to revive the forest.
[16:14] Hina
I know that spell!
[16:16] Hina
It's Return-the-Forest-Spirit-Head, right?
[16:17] Kerin
No!
[16:19] Kerin
The forest was restored, but Elu-san
paid the price, and was turned to stone.
[16:25] Hime
What a sad story.
[16:27] Kerin
Yeah. And ever since I heard about it,
[16:30] ---
I've been studying magic to restore her,
here in the forests of Gunma.
[16:35] Hina
Sorry we barged in here without knowing.
[16:38] Kerin
The timing actually works out.
I actually just finished the spell.
[16:42] Hime
Wow, convenient!
[16:45] Kerin
Forests, earth, birds!
[16:47] Kerin
Let your life force fuel my magic circle,
and release Elu-san from her petrification!
[16:53] Kerin
Elu Dorado!
SIGN Elu-san—!
[17:00] Gori
Hello.
[17:05] Gori
Hello.
SIGN Sister!
[17:16] Uma
I hope this works today.
[17:18] Uma
Hear me out, Sister.
[17:19] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[17:20] Uma
There's a girl who I
really want to tell how—
[17:22] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[17:27] Sister
What is it?
[17:28] Sora
I wanted to make breakfast for a friend,
but all I could make was a mushy fried egg!
[17:33] Sora
I just know they hate me now!
[17:35] Sister
You have nothing to worry about.
[17:38] Sister
Cooking is all about love and sincerity.
[17:40] Sister
As long as your feelings were conveyed,
the appearance doesn't matter.
[17:43] Sora
That's a relief.
[17:45] Sister
And even if it's mushy, two pieces of bread
can make it into a lovely egg sandwich.
[17:51] Sora
I get it!
[17:52] Sora
Okay, tomorrow, I'm gonna pull this off!
[17:56] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[17:58] Uma
An egg sandwich sounds delicious!
SIGN Sister!
[18:05] Aoi
Virtual-san is looking!
[18:06] Aoi
So look, look, look at this!
[18:10] Hina
Okay, I've got a letter right here!
[18:13] Hina
From pen name "The Pen Is
Virtual Division the Sword-san."
[18:17] Hina
Thanks for writing in!
[18:17] Girls
Thank you!
[18:21] Hina
Let's see, "I've always loved hip hop."
[18:24] Hina
"And I was curious if
you all listened to it."
[18:26] Hina
"If you don't mind, I'd like to
hear you all do freestyle raps."
[18:29] Hina
So it says!
SIGN Letter: Let's hear some
freestyle raps
[18:30] Hinata
This is bad!
[18:32] Mito
I can't possibly do something like this,
not in sudden death mode.
[18:35] Hina
If you're virtual Youtubers,
surely you can rap a bit?
[18:41] Hina
Everybody ready?
[18:42] Hinata
No!
[18:45] Mito
Uh, what? Who are you supposed
to be? What is this?
[18:48] Mito
It's an earthquake!
[18:49] Shiro
What the heck?
[18:50] Mito
A heartbeat?
[18:50] Hina
It's beatboxing...
[18:51] Hime
Oh, that's it!
[18:53] Hina
Hina's going first!
[18:55] Hime
Yeah!
[18:55] Hina
Gonna drop a beat on them with a virtual rap!
[18:58] All
Yeah!
[18:59] Mito
Wow, she's actually got it down!
[19:01] Hina
Woo! Uh... don't stop the backbeat, please.
[19:03] Girls
Oh, okay.
[19:05] Hina
What's up with winter,
who you supposed to be?
[19:07] Hina
Winter, for you, hot water for stew!
[19:09] Hina
Hey! Yo! Check it out!
[19:11] Hina
Next up!
[19:13] Shiro
I'm the girl up next after Hina!
[19:15] Shiro
Gonna break a beat, so let's-a go!
[19:17] Shiro
It's winter, I've been here, no fear!
[19:23] Hinata
To all the boys and girls on the streets
[19:25] Hinata
Styling to the beats!
[19:26] Hinata
Independent, born to rend it,
if there's bad we better end it!
[19:29] Hinata
The young kids born into a paper society!
[19:32] Hinata
But we're not gonna split
or take the demerit!
[19:36] Hinata
We've got work steady, ready,
like a turtle in an eddy! Yeah!
[19:39] Hime
Turtle in a what?!
[19:40] Hime
Turtles?
[19:41] Hinata
Next up, next up, next up, next up!
[19:44] Hime
The rowdy girl named Tanaka Hime!
[19:46] Hime
Someone said turtle and
I don't know what to say!
[19:49] Hime
If a turtle crawls under your table,
[19:51] Hime
and lifts it up is it port-able?
[19:53] Hime
Yo! Next up is Akari-chan!
[20:00] Akari
You know what's sexy? Turtles!
[20:03] Mito
Damn it!
[20:04] Mito
Damn it...!
[20:09] Akari
You know what's sexy? Turtles!
[20:11] Akari
And you know what turtles are? Sexy!
[20:14] Mito
Change the subject!
[20:15] Mito
Please, change the subject, Akari-san!
[20:19] Akari
This is hard, really hard,
and I'm bad, I admit!
[20:22] Akari
But if sexy is the subject, then I love it!
[20:25] Akari
Nothing's funner than sexy stuff, yo!
[20:27] Akari
Now, Mito-chan, say something sexy!
[20:30] Mito
I have to do a sexy rap now?!
[20:32] Hinata
Go, go, go...
[20:34] Mito
All right, here I go...
[20:36] Mito
This is it!
[20:37] Mito
I like citrus, so have a
happy Merry Christmas.
[20:39] Mito
I, uh...
[20:40] Mito
Speaking of snow, there's snowballs...
[20:41] Mito
Throw balls... a lot of... throwing...
[20:46] Mito
A whole lot!
[20:46] Mito
I'm really just throwing whatever out now.
[20:49] Mito
This isn't rap anymore.
[20:50] Hime
Any ideas?
[20:51] Mito
Right, rap, rap...
[20:52] Mito
Let's see...
[20:54] Mito
I'm good at throwing balls of snow.
[20:56] Mito
Show, flow, bow and arrow!
[21:02] Mito
Uh, and next... uh...
[21:04] Mito
Who hasn't gone yet?
[21:05] Mito
Did you go yet, Hina-san?
[21:07] Girls
That's it! That's everyone!
[21:08] Mito
Oh, is that everyone? We're done!
[21:10] Akari
Finish it up with something cool!
[21:12] Mito
Last one, last bun, last run...
[21:15] Mito
I won. Are we done? Can I stop?
[21:18] Shiro
Now that's what I call virtual Youtubers!
[21:22] Mito
It certainly is...
[21:24] Hina
And that wraps it up for this week!
[21:27] Hina
And so, until next week...
[21:29] Hina
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Rindo Mikoto
[23:11] Rindo
I'm the oni queen, Rindo Mikoto.
[23:13] Rindo
Now, you delightful children of man,
[23:15] Rindo
during the Setsubun holiday,
you like to shout,
[23:18] ---
"Oni get out, fortune come in,"
and then throw beans at us, yes?
[23:21] Rindo
But even oni can hurt,
and not just physically.
[23:24] Rindo
You also shouldn't waste food.
[23:27] Rindo
Which is why I always make a point
to catch it all in my mouth.
[23:30] Rindo
Next time is "Erupt!
Maximum Magic, Buchitova."
SIGN Next Time
"Erupt! Maximum Magic, Buchitova."
[23:33] Rindo
Virtual-san will still be looking next week.
E4 - Untitled
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Peanut
They say that cucumbers are supposed to
have the fewest calories of all fruits.
[00:06] Uma
Hey, hey, hey! Then what about carrots?
[00:08] Peanut
I'm talking about cucumbers
right now, you horsey bastard!
[00:10] Uma
Hey, hey!
[00:18] Shiro
Four sixty-six! Four sixty-seven!
Really working up a sweat!
[00:22] Hinata
Let's all pull off a sweet
muscle pose today! Here we go!
[00:28] All
Virtual-san is looking!
[02:16] Kaede
Virtual-san is looking!
[02:30] Ryo
I'm sorry about the other day.
[02:32] Miria
No more inventing weird stuff, Ryo-kun.
[02:36] Haruto
Listen, people, have you seen the chief?
[02:39] Miria
Kaede-chan?
[02:40] Miria
She picked up a weird life reading outside
the ship and wanted to check on it.
[02:45] Kaede
Ow, ow, ow, ow...
[02:47] Ryo
Chief? What's wrong?
[02:50] Kaede
I found some strange life form
[02:51] Kaede
where I couldn't tell if it was
alive or dead, and it bit me...
[02:54] Haruto
You're hurt, chief?
[02:56] Haruto
You should get it treated!
[02:58] Kaede
But it's not that big a wound,
I'm sure it's...
[03:03] Miria
Kaede-chan?
[03:05] Ryo
Chief?
[03:06] Haruto
What the?!
[03:07] Haruto
Hey!
[03:08] Haruto
Ch-chief!
[03:12] Miria
Kaede-chan! No!
[03:14] Miria
The neck is...
[03:17] Haruto
The chief is eating the pink fool!
[03:21] Miria
Harutrash...
[03:25] Haruto
Ryo! We need to retreat!
[03:26] ---
The chief and the pink fool
are acting strange!
[03:29] Kaede
Ryo-kun...
[03:31] Ryo
Haru-kun, help me!
[03:33] Ryo
Chief, stay away!
[03:35] Ryo
No! I said stop...
[03:38] Haruto
Damn it!
[03:40] Haruto
It's a pandemic.
[03:42] Haruto
One that might wipe out the game club!
[03:45] Miria
Harutrash!
SIGN Chomp
SIGN Game Club
SIGN Zombie Club
SIGN Zombie Club
[03:57] Kaede
Now we're all zombies, huh?
[04:00] Miria
Surprising how much consciousness
we still have.
[04:03] Ryo
Seriously.
[04:06] Haruto
If anything, doesn't becoming
undead make us unstoppable?
[04:10] Ryo
True.
[04:12] Kaede
You all look great.
[04:17] Kaede
Keep that camera rolling!
[04:20] Ryo
The chief is trying to
cash in on that movie.
[04:23] Miria
I wanna do the Thriller dance with all of you!
[04:27] Haruto
Good idea, pink fool.
[04:33] Kaede
Okay, let's invade enemy
territory while dancing!
[04:38] All
Hoo!
[04:42] Kaede
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
[04:54] Grandma
Sunpo Nankou.
SIGN Today's Phrase:
Sunpo Nankou
[04:58] Grandma
That's the phrase.
SIGN Grandma
[05:00] Grandma
It refers to times when you have trouble
crossing even the smallest distance.
[05:05] Grandma
"Having trouble crossing" might be a
bit melodramatic, but in the old days,
[05:10] ---
transportation wasn't as easy as it is now.
[05:12] Grandma
Depending on the time, there would
be detours because of road work,
[05:16] Grandma
and all kinds of construction, and holes
in the road as a result, everywhere.
[05:22] Grandma
But when it comes to walking,
the thing that shocked me the most
[05:26] ---
when I moved to Tokyo in 1964,
were women in high heels.
[05:31] Grandma
The roads were in better shape than
they were in the country, to be sure,
SIGN Grandma
[05:35] Grandma
but in my home, Niigata, heavy duty
construction hadn't started yet,
[05:40] ---
making it hard to get anywhere.
[05:42] Grandma
So when I moved to Tokyo with that mindset,
and saw women in high heels,
[05:48] ---
I could only think,
"How can they walk like that?"
[05:51] Grandma
That said, your Virtual Grandmother can
freely travel, no matter how old she gets.
[05:59] Grandma
Just like this!
[06:06] Grandma
I can get great air, too, in fact.
[06:08] Grandma
Three, two, one, blast off!
[06:13] Grandma
Fly, Sachiko!
SIGN Grandma
[06:26] Hime
Virtual-san is looking!
[06:35] Hinata
Man, I thought we were done for!
[06:38] Hinata
It sure is great to be alive!
[06:40] Hina
Hey, hey, did any of you see that special
feature on animals that was on TV yesterday?
[06:45] Akari
I totally did! The chimpanzee
segment was so cute!
[06:49] Shiro
I liked the one on kitties!
[06:53] Hina
I think I liked the penguins best!
[06:55] Hina
I know, why don't we all
go to the zoo some day?
[06:58] Everyone
Sounds good!
[07:05] Hinata
That scared me! What was that shaking?
[07:10] Hime
Hang on...
[07:12] Hime
Isn't it really quiet?
[07:14] Hime
I don't hear a single thing from outside!
[07:17] Shiro
You're right! No wind
from the outside, either!
[07:21] Mito
Could it be...?
[07:23] Mito
Everyone, are we at—?!
[07:27] Everyone
The bottom of the sea!
[07:29] Shiro
Why would we be at the bottom of the sea?!
[07:32] Hime
But if you think about it, we've got air,
and the classroom's power is still on.
[07:36] Hime
I don't think we need to panic.
[07:38] Hime
Things will probably go
back to normal in a while.
[07:41] Mito
Good point! Let's just wait for the
classroom to return to normal, then.
[07:46] Shiro
Still, I didn't know it
was like this down here.
[07:49] Shiro
You can't dive this far down,
so it's kind of interesting.
[07:54] Akari
Hey, a penguin!
[07:56] Hina
A penguin?! Where, where, where?!
[07:59] Hina
Hey, you're right! So cute!
[08:03] Hinata
It's cute, but...
[08:05] Hinata
Deep sea penguins sure are huge, huh?
[08:09] Mito
Uh... I think... it's way too big!
[08:14] Hime
It's opening its beak!
[08:16] Peanut
Here I come!
[08:19] Akari
You again?!
[08:22] Hime
Hina, you love penguins!
Do something about this! Quick!
[08:27] Hina
I don't like my penguins this big!
[08:31] Hina
It's gonna eat us!
SIGN To Be Continued
[08:43] Hina
Thank you for calling.
This is "Virtual-san is looking."
[08:50] Aoi
That'll do it.
[08:52] Aoi
When Gori-chan goes for that banana,
I'll pull the string, and I'll catch him.
[08:56] Aoi
This'll be great!
[08:59] Gori
Yo, yo, my name is Gorilla!
[09:02] Gori
When it comes to the jungle,
there's no one iller!
[09:03] Gori
Solid gold content with no filler!
[09:05] Gori
Gonna open to door to another thriller!
[09:12] Gori
Hello.
[09:13] Aoi
So he can shrink and grow at will.
[09:14] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[09:16] Gori
Hello.
[09:19] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble Akari-chan!
[09:25] Hime
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[09:30] Akari
What is it, Hime?
[09:32] Hime
Someone with the pen-name
"Yumirin-chan" is in trouble!
[09:35] Hime
Here, read this!
[09:37] Akari
Let's take a look.
[09:39] Akari
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello.
[09:40] Hime
H'lo.
[09:42] Akari
"I'm thinking about quitting my job."
[09:45] Akari
Wow, really?
[09:46] Akari
"My bosses treat me bad, I have to work a ton
of overtime, and every day is really hard."
[09:49] Hime
Oh, wow...
[09:50] Akari
"But I feel like quitting would be
like giving up. What should I do?"
[09:53] Hime
Man, this is serious!
SIGN Problem: Whether or not to quit your job
SIGN
[09:58] Akari
What should she do?
[09:59] Hime
Yeah, good question...
[10:01] Hime
Mirai-san?
[10:02] Hime
Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[10:05] Hikari
I think she should quit.
[10:07] Hikari
If she stresses herself until she's sick,
it'd defeat the point of having a job, right?
[10:10] Yami
But just quitting is dull.
[10:12] Yami
Let's get some revenge.
[10:14] Hikari
Revenge?!
[10:14] Yami
Sneak a secret photo into a desk.
[10:17] Hikari
I've heard about this before.
[10:18] Yami
Or have Chono-san slap somebody.
[10:20] Hikari
Oh, I know this show!
[10:22] Yami
The rest... I leave to you, Akari.
[10:25] Yami
Seeya.
[10:26] Hikari
Take it from here, Akari!
[10:28] Hime
Hello?
[10:29] Hime
Hello!
[10:30] Hime
Mirai-san?!
[10:32] Akari
Sorry, I was in a world of my own!
[10:35] Hime
Good morning.
[10:36] Akari
Okay, pen-name Yumirin-chan,
I'll get to the bottom line!
[10:41] Hime
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
[10:45] Akari
You should get a new job at a company
that supports a matchmaking app!
[10:49] Hime
A new job?
[10:51] Akari
Then you should find a girl
that your old boss would like!
[10:54] Hime
What for?!
[10:56] Akari
Then you hire a detective!
[10:59] Hime
But why? Why?!
[11:00] Akari
You have the detective shadow them,
after matching the boss and the girl.
[11:05] Akari
Then you have the detective
take pictures of them together,
[11:09] ---
and send some scandalous pictures
to your old boss's family!
[11:13] Hime
That's scary!
[11:15] Akari
That way you can get a new
job and get revenge, too!
[11:19] Hime
Akari-chan, you're a genius!
[11:21] Akari
I sure am!
[11:22] Hime
Wow!
[11:23] Hime
But y'know, if you make that
match, and they get together,
[11:26] Hime
wouldn't he be really glad about
finding a cute young girl?
[11:30] Akari
True.
[11:31] Akari
If that happens, then you call up Chono-san.
[11:35] Hime
Got it!
[11:36] Hime
Okay, I'm gonna go grab him, then!
[11:39] Akari
Uh, wait a sec, Tanaka...
[11:40] Akari
That's not the first step!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[11:47] Hinata
This lot is pretty big.
[11:52] Hinata
Up we go.
[11:57] Hinata
This is bad.
[11:59] Hinata
This place is surrounded by buildings.
[12:02] Hinata
If I was surrounded by people in the building
behind me, along with the ones in front,
[12:05] Hinata
on top of enemies blocking
the street, what would I do?
[12:10] Hinata
I mustn't run away.
[12:11] Hinata
I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away,
I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away!
[12:15] Hinata
No matter how tough the situation,
I will find a way to survive!
[12:18] Hinata
Now I wanna play some video games, though.
[12:23] Hinata
Okay, I'll skip school and head home.
[12:28] Akari
Hinata...
[12:29] Hinata
Whoa, Akari-cha! What are you doing there?!
[12:30] Akari
You shouldn't play hooky.
[12:33] Akari
This pipe is my territory!
[12:35] Hinata
What?! You think I can't splat over it?!
[12:39] Akari
Come on, off to school.
[12:41] Hinata
Hang on!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[12:50] Hinata
Yay! Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[12:58] Shiro
Oh, it's Aoi-chan! Welcome!
[13:02] Aoi
I am so fed up!
[13:04] Aoi
Can I get some trivia about candy, please?
[13:06] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
SIGN Trivia, go!
[13:12] Shiro
Ah, candy...
SIGN "Candy"
[13:16] Shiro
Y'know, there's a candy that was invented
in Germany for the dental health of kids!
[13:22] Shiro
In 1920, Germany had fewer foods
that required heavy duty chewing,
[13:28] Shiro
which was causing a lot of children
to develop dental problems.
[13:30] Shiro
And so, something was created in order
to force children to chew harder
[13:34] ---
in order to prevent dental problems: gummies!
[13:38] ---
The name comes from the
German word for rubber.
[13:41] ---
By the way, if you give
someone gummies on white day,
[13:44] ---
it carries the message of, "I don't
like you," so keep that in mind!
[13:52] Aoi
Wow, really? Your trivia really
is always handy, Siro-chan!
SIGN Special Announcement
SIGN The Sudden Appearance of a City
SIGN Overflowing with crowds
SIGN Giant Growth
SIGN Transformation
SIGN The secrets of the opening are about to be revealed!?
SIGN Coming Soon!!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[14:21] Mito
I've got a bad feeling about this.
[14:23] Mito
Like I shouldn't open this door.
[14:29] Mito
Shut up! Mugi-chan, calm down!
[14:31] Mito
Keep that decibel level down!
[14:32] Mugi
Well, I was scared on my own,
[14:34] Mugi
and when the door suddenly opened,
I was scared!
[14:36] Mito
I guess I scared you, and I'm sorry.
[14:38] Mito
But this is the ultimate decision committee,
[14:40] Mito
so are you ready to to go?
[14:42] Mugi
Yes!
[14:42] Mito
Here is today's subject.
[14:44] Mito
If you could only eat one thing,
would it be a) meat or b) grass?
[14:48] Mugi
Grass was something you ate before, right?
[14:51] Mito
When I was in elementary school, I had
a a bit too much curiosity, so yes,
[14:54] Mito
but I have it under control now, thank you.
[14:56] Mito
So, which is it, Mugi-chan?
[14:57] Mugi
I think I'd pick meat.
[15:01] Mugi
I want to live a long time,
and did you know this?
[15:04] Mito
Yes?
[15:05] Mugi
Setouchi Jakucho-san eats 800 grams of meat
a day, and she's ninety-five years old!
[15:11] Mito
True enough, she's living proof.
[15:13] Mugi
Yep, that's right!
[15:14] Mito
But Mugi-chan, you've never
eaten grass before, right?
[15:17] Mugi
Well, that's true.
[15:19] Mito
It's important to try new things!
[15:21] Mito
You shut-ins are just a little
too set in your ways, I suppose.
[15:25] Mugi
I am not!
[15:26] Mito
That's the bell for 3 PM!
[15:27] Mito
Well, I honestly wasn't sure at first
this time, but ultimately it has to be B!
[15:31] Mugi
But grass doesn't taste good!
[15:34] Mito
You want to eat some meat?
[15:35] Mugi
I wanna eat meat!
[15:36] Mito
You do realize everyone's
onto those crocodile tears?
[15:39] Mugi
But everyone is so nice to me when I do it!
[15:41] Mito
Why, you little...
[15:42] Mito
Well, I recommend you all try
eating the grass around your home!
[15:45] Mito
It'll open a whole new world for you!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[15:51] Rin
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[15:54] Unity
Unity-chan!
[15:57] Unity
Hi, everybody, it's Ootori Kohaku!
[15:59] Unity
Today I've got something good to show you!
[16:02] Unity
This is a big warehouse that my
papa gave me that's on the wharf,
[16:05] Unity
and it's where I hang out!
[16:07] Unity
It's got a bunch of stuff I've collected!
[16:10] Unity
Like this thing, and that thing...
[16:13] Unity
And this here, and I like this one!
[16:14] Unity
Then there's this! Oof!
[16:19] Unity
Impressive, right?
[16:22] Unity
And yet, somehow...
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
SIGN Pen Name: Ruruno Ruru
SIGN Pen Name: Saotome Miko
SIGN Pen Name: Suzuki Miyano
SIGN Pen Name: Nadasaki Tooru
SIGN Pen Name: Sanpi
SIGN Pen Name: Kishi Tsurone
SIGN Pen Name: High Neck Wolf
SIGN Pen Name: Shinonome Kizuna
SIGN Pen Name: Vortex
SIGN Pen Name: Maron
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer.
[16:46] Kerin
Elu-san!
[16:51] Gori
Hello.
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[16:56] Kerin
Why?!
[16:58] Hime
It's a gorilla! So cute!
[17:00] Gori
Hello.
[17:00] Hina
So Elu-san's a gorilla now?
[17:03] Kerin
Don't be ridiculous.
[17:04] Kerin
She... My Elu-san...
[17:06] Kerin
She'd never be so hairy!
[17:08] Gori
Good elfning!
[17:09] Gori
I'm here from the land of elves!
I'm the high-minded elven beauty, Elu!
[17:14] Gori
Hello!
SIGN Cut that out!
[17:16] Kerin
Keblins, get this gorilla scum out of here!
[17:21] Gori
What are you doing?! I haven't
had enough screen time!
[17:23] Hime
Wait!
[17:24] Hime
Let poor Gori say something!
[17:26] Kerin
What is it, gorilla?
[17:30] Gori
The thing about bananas is...
[17:31] Gori
People think they grow on trees, right?
But they're actually grass.
SIGN This is grass
[17:35] Gori
And did you know that they're
not fruits, but vegetables?
[17:43] Hime & Hina
Get that liar out of here!
[17:44] Gori
Hello!
[17:46] Kerin
Damn it! I can't believe that
nuisance got in the way.
[17:49] Kerin
I was gonna save Elu-san,
[17:51] Kerin
make her fall for me,
[17:53] Kerin
destroy the world,
[17:54] Kerin
and create a paradise for the two
of us, and now the plan's ruined!
[17:57] Hime
So you were up to no good
after all, you goofy goober!
[18:02] Kerin
You are the one who's a goofy goober!
[18:04] Kerin
Go forth, Keblins!
[18:05] Hina
Hao!
[18:07] Hime
Hao Hao!
[18:09] Hime
There's no end to them!
[18:11] Hime
Hina, look out!
[18:14] Hina
S-Stop it! My bellybutton...
Don't play with it!
[18:18] Kerin
You two are done for! I'll blow you both up!
[18:21] Hime
This is bad!
[18:22] Kerin
Super Maximum Magic, Buchitoga!
[18:28] Hina
Hime, this is bad! That's the high
level version of Buchitova, Buchitoga!
[18:32] Hime
Boy, that naming convention sounds familiar!
[18:35] Hime
What do we do?!
[18:37] Hina
I didn't want to use this, but...
[18:40] Hina
Time for the maximum
defensive magic, Gorillaga!
[18:47] Gori
Hello!
[18:48] Gori
Hello.
[18:50] Kerin
Damn it! This stupid gorilla
keeps getting in my way!
[18:55] Kerin
This isn't over!
[19:00] Hina
He was really tough.
[19:02] Hime
Yeah!
[19:03] Hime
Hey, Hina-chan, want to
grab some banana shakes?
[19:06] Hina
Sounds nice!
[19:07] Hina
Y'know, bananas are vegetables!
[19:10] Hime
Hello! Bananas! Hello!
[19:12] Hime
So cute!
SIGN Sister!
[19:22] Uma
I hope you can finally hear
me out this time, Sister.
[19:24] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[19:26] Uma
There's this girl I want to—
[19:27] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[19:33] Sister
What is it?
[19:35] Sora
A friend of mine borrowed a book
and hasn't returned it yet!
[19:37] Sora
It's hard to ask for it back,
so what should I do?
[19:41] Sister
Why not tell them that another
friend wants to borrow it?
[19:46] Sora
I actually tried that, but they
just apologized and brushed it off.
[19:51] Sister
I would try writing a letter, then.
[19:54] Sora
Do you really think someone who'd
brush it off would even read it?
[19:57] Sister
Not for them, but for their parents.
[20:00] Sora
Going to the parents?!
[20:01] Sister
They will then speak to your friend.
[20:04] Sister
That should get them to pay
attention and return your book.
[20:07] Sora
Okay, I better go buy some stationery!
[20:12] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[20:14] Uma
I'm the one who borrowed it, Sister!
SIGN Sister!
[20:20] Uma
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Virtual-san is looking! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
[20:26] Everyone
Okay, we've got a letter here.
[20:29] Akari
It's from pen name "Tom Is Pen"-san.
[20:31] Everyone
Thanks for writing!
[20:35] Akari
"Lately, I can't stop playing video games."
[20:37] Akari
"Please talk about your favorite games..."
[20:40] Akari
"Without using any English words."
[20:42] Mito
Why?
SIGN Theme:
Your Favorite
Video Games
SIGN * No English Allowed
[20:47] Akari
Ready... start!
SIGN Theme: Talk about your favorite
video games (no English allowed)
[20:48] Hime
Gong!
[20:49] Hina
Your favorite... g-ga—
[20:51] Hime
Games!
SIGN Game
[20:52] Mito
Tanaka!
[20:55] Akari
Wait, hang on, I have to count every foul!
[20:57] Hinata
Wait, Akari, that's...
SIGN Count
[21:00] Akari
This is really hard, guys! Give me a break!
[21:03] Mito
Well, I enjoy romance games.
[21:05] Everyone
Oh, romance games!
[21:06] Mito
The cool ones, especially.
[21:08] Akari
What kind of ty...
[21:08] Hime
The ones with stories!
[21:10] Akari
Uh, never mind, I mean wh-what kinda..
[21:11] Someone
Tai?
[21:12] Akari
What kind of... Thai?
[21:13] Someone
Thai!
[21:14] Akari
No!
[21:16] Mito
Akari!
[21:17] Mito
Don't try and narrow down the genre of game!
[21:19] Hime
Hey, Mito-chan said "game"! You said game!
SIGN Game
[21:22] Mito
This is chaos!
[21:24] Akari
That does it for this week!
[21:26] Akari
And so, until next week...
[21:29] Everyone
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Roboko
[23:09] Roboko
Hello, robo! I'm the super
advanced robotic Vtuber, Roboko!
[23:13] Roboko
I'm sure you've all had your
glasses fog up before, right?
[23:17] Roboko
Like when you go indoors on a cold day,
[23:20] Roboko
when you're wearing a face mask,
[23:21] Roboko
or when you're drinking some hot coffee!
[23:24] Roboko
Wow, can you imagine how hard it'd be to see
if you drank hot coffee with a face mask on?
[23:30] Roboko
Wait, did somebody just call me junk?
SIGN Next time is "One Cannot Live Without Loafing!"
SIGN Next Time
"One Cannot Live Without Loafing!"
SIGN And next week, Virtual-san will be looking again!
E5 - Untitled
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Peanut
Y'know, the scientific name for
gorillas is gorilla gorilla!
[00:06] Uma
Hey, hey, hey, hey! So what
about virtual gorillas?
[00:08] Peanut
They don't need one, you horsey bastard!
[00:10] Uma
Hey, hey!
[00:13] Hinata
Wow, look at all the books.
[00:16] Mito
Oh, Hamlet.
[00:17] Mito
"To be or not to be? That is the question."
[00:20] Hina
What brought all that on?
[00:21] Mito
It's a famous line written by Shakespeare.
[00:23] Mito
You see it come up online a lot nowadays.
[00:26] Shiro
Oh, I know him!
[00:27] Shiro
"Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?"
That guy, right?
[00:31] Mito
Right! He's an incredibly
famous poet and playwright.
[00:35] Hime
Siroet! Can I bring you
home with me tonight?
[00:38] Shiro
Okey-dokey!
[00:40] Mirai
There's no time for this, everyone!
We must get ready for the opening!
[00:43] Hime
Wh-What did you say?!
[00:44] Shiro
It's nearly time for the title call!
[00:48] Mito
Uh... we know.
[00:49] Hinata
I'm... uh, no, I am ready as well!
[00:52] Hina
Let us sally forth, then,
unto the title call!
[00:55] Hina
Ready and...
[00:56] Everyone
Virtual-san is...
[00:58] Everyone
Virtual-san is...
[00:59] Everyone
Virtual-san is...
[01:00] Everyone
Looking!
[01:05] Hime
Yeah!
[01:06] Mito
What the heck?
[02:50] Mugi
Virtual-san is looking!
[03:06] Kaede
Everyone, we've been slacking off lately!
[03:08] Kaede
At this rate, we'll never be
able to conquer the galaxy!
[03:10] Kaede
Which is why I've been thinking...
[03:12] Miria
I want to hear Kaede-chan's plan!
[03:14] Kaede
To destroy the planets of every Vtuber,
we need to infiltrate them!
[03:17] Kaede
So this is what I've come up with...
[03:19] Kaede
We need to master mimicry,
so we can impersonate other people!
[03:23] Haruto
I see! We make others
think we're someone else,
[03:26] Haruto
and once their guard is down, defeat them!
[03:28] Haruto
Excellent idea, chief!
[03:30] Miria
I'm not that good at impressions, though.
[03:33] Miria
Ryo-kun is the one who is!
[03:35] Ryo
I'm not that good at it, either.
[03:38] Miria
Mirai Akari-chan!
[03:39] Ryo
Hello! Mirai Akari here!
[03:41] Miria
Nekomiya Hinata-chan.
[03:42] Ryo
Yahoo guys, how you doing?
Nekomiya Hinata here.
[03:46] Miria
Tanaka Hime-chan!
[03:47] Ryo
Hao! I'm Tanaka Hime! Yay!
[03:49] Miria
Peanuts-kun.
[03:51] Ryo
This is really solid ground.
[03:52] Kaede
Ryo-kun, you're incredible!
[03:54] Haruto
You can infiltrate enemy
territory on your own, Ryo!
[03:56] Kaede
What about the rest of you?
[03:58] Kaede
You seem like you might have a few, Haruto.
[03:59] Haruto
I don't really...
[04:01] Miria
A certain person who says
this is a one-way street!
[04:03] Haruto
Can I help you with something, Kihara-kun?
[04:06] Miria
Someone hard to notice that plays basketball!
[04:07] Haruto
I'm a shadow.
[04:08] Miria
Not bad, Harutrash!
[04:10] Miria
Now it's my turn!
[04:11] Miria
It's that person who barfs people up!
[04:14] Haruto
So many mini-pink idiots! What even is this?!
[04:18] Ryo
Miria-chan, that's less an impersonation
and more of a shocking trick!
[04:21] Haruto
Not to mention useless when
it comes to infiltrating!
[04:24] Kaede
Okay, I'm going to go last with something
I think might be good for infiltrating.
[04:27] Kaede
It's a housewife who gets caught
shoplifting on reality TV!
[04:30] Ryo
Why would that help!?
SIGN Well, I wasn't planning on shoplifting, but before I knew it, it was in of my purse.
SIGN Can you just let me go? I'll pay for it.
SIGN I told you, I wasn't shoplifting!
[04:40] Haruto
Hey, I think the chief might have
taken too well to her role!
[04:44] Ryo
Miria-chan, you can stop throwing up!
[04:45] Kaede
Please, just don't tell
my husband about this!
[04:48] Narration
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
[04:58] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
[05:01] Grandma
"Uogokoro areba mizugokoro."
SIGN Grandma
SIGN Today's Phrase:
Uogokoro Areba
Mizugokoro
[05:05] Banner
That's the phrase.
[05:08] Banner
It refers to how being shown good will
can encourage someone to do the same.
[05:13] Granny
I thought I'd talk a bit about Valentine's Day
and White Day this week.
[05:18] Granny
Valentine's Day started becoming a fixture
in Japan in the latter half of the 1970s.
[05:24] Granny
And White Day in the first half of the 1980s.
[05:29] Granny
The specifics about the dates weren't
really commonly known at the time,
[05:33] ---
so it took them a while to
actually take a hold, culturally.
[05:37] Granny
There are all kinds of interesting
chocolates out there now, aren't there?
[05:42] Granny
You know, like glasses or bats!
Like, chocolate bats...
[05:45] Granny
I think it'd be wonderful if this program
[05:47] ---
was a chance to be immortalized
in chocolate myself.
[05:50] Granny
A life-sized chocolate Kobayashi Sachiko!
[05:53] Granny
We'll call it...
[05:54] Granny
Godivava.
SIGN Grandma
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Lost Alien Akuhato
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[06:09] Hat
My homeland, the Ugarid Nebula,
was destroyed by invaders,
[06:13] Hat
and I have come to Earth as a refugee,
the Alien Akuhato.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[06:24] Alice
Virtual-san is looking! Yeah!
[06:30] Hinata
Hello, everybody!
[06:33] Hinata
You keeping it virtual out there?
[06:34] Hinata
Because it's time for Virtual Radio!
[06:37] Hinata
We've got another great virtual
song to introduce today!
[06:41] Hinata
This one...
[06:43] Hinata
...is a cute and pop magical number,
[06:46] Hinata
where the "Hello! Hello!" calls are so catchy,
they'll leave you with a spring in your step!
[06:49] Hinata
It's a super pop and sexy
virtual cutie cool song!
[06:54] Hinata
Let's throw it on now! This is
Mirai Akari's "Mirai to Mirai."
SIGN "Mirai to Mirai"
By: Mirai Akari
[07:21] Hinata
That's a nice virtual song!
[07:24] Hinata
That was "Mirai to Mirai" by Mirai Akari.
[07:28] Hinata
See you next time! Keep it V!
[07:38] Ryo
Virtual-san is looking.
[07:44] Gori
Hello.
[07:45] Aoi
There!
[07:45] Gori
Hello.
[07:46] Aoi
There!
[07:47] Gori
Hello.
[07:47] Aoi
There!
[07:48] Gori
Hello.
[07:49] Aoi
There! There! There!
[07:50] Gori
Hello... Hello... Hello... Hello...
[07:54] Aoi
Huh? G-Gori-chan?
[08:00] Gori
Hello!
[08:01] Aoi
I can't reach that far!
[08:03] Both
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[08:05] Gori
Hello.
[08:08] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble, Akari-chan!
[08:13] Hime
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[08:20] Akari
What is it, Hime?
[08:21] Hime
Akari-san, we've got ever such big trouble!
[08:24] Akari
Well, what's going on?
[08:25] Hime
Someone with the pen name "Ochabba-kun"
is in trouble! They've got problems!
[08:27] Hime
Hurry, take it! Read it, read it now!
[08:29] Akari
Okay, fork it over, come on!
[08:32] Akari
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello!
[08:33] Hime
H'lo.
[08:35] Akari
"I loaned my friend a
video game a while ago,
[08:37] Akari
and it's now been three months
with no sign of them returning it."
[08:40] Akari
"Do you think they intend on keeping it?"
[08:42] Akari
"They might have just forgotten about it,
[08:43] Akari
so I have trouble bringing up, because I
don't want them to think I'm accusing them."
SIGN Problem: A loaned game isn't being returned
[08:47] Hime
This is an awkward one!
[08:49] Akari
True enough...
[08:50] Hime
Did he swipe it?
[08:50] Akari
But three months is a weird
amount of time, y'know?
[08:54] Hime
Yeah, three months!
[08:55] Hime
I mean, the game might
take that long to finish!
[08:57] Akari
True, if it's a longer one!
[08:59] Hime
Right, right!
[09:00] Akari
And you're friends, so it's hard
to really come down hard on it.
[09:03] Hime
Right, totally!
[09:04] Akari
What to do?
[09:06] Hime
This is a hard one!
[09:08] Hime
Huh?
[09:10] ---
Mirai-san?
[09:12] Hime
Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[09:13] Hikari
The best thing is to wait patiently.
[09:16] Hikari
I mean, there are other games to play!
[09:18] Yami
You need to dox people like this.
[09:21] Yami
Get some proof they swiped
your game and let 'er rip!
[09:23] Hikari
But they're friends! Could you please not?
[09:26] Yami
Well, you take it from here, Akari.
[09:29] Hime
Hello?
[09:31] Hime
Hello! Mirai-san!
[09:34] Akari
Sorry! I'm back!
[09:35] Hime
Welcome home.
[09:36] Akari
Not sure what that was about.
[09:37] Hime
Must be rough!
[09:39] Akari
Well, pen name Ochabba-kun,
I'm gonna get to the bottom line.
[09:44] Hime
Is this it?!
[09:46] ---
She's going to show her bottom! Line?
[09:48] Akari
You need to have your friend
become a Let's Player!
[09:52] Hime
Let's Plays?!
[09:53] Akari
Right!
[09:54] Akari
You set things up for them,
[09:56] Akari
so that they can become
a famous Let's Player!
[09:58] Akari
Their handle can be "1BRO."
[10:00] Akari
1BRO? But they're not brothers!
[10:03] Akari
What the heck? What the
heck's that about, then?
[10:05] Akari
Then how about "Ninja"?
[10:06] Hime
Ninja?! That's one lonely ninja!
[10:08] Hime
Then, after they're famous,
[10:10] Hime
you set things up so that their stream is
going to show their LINE window instead!
[10:15] Hime
Then you capture an image of
a LINE message where you say,
[10:17] ---
"Ever since you swiped that game a year ago,
and my heart and body have been aching!"
[10:20] ---
and stick it on the stream.
[10:23] Hime
Okay, I'm gonna go check out ○Bro's videos!
[10:27] Akari
Make sure you watch the TLOU one, Tanaka!
[10:29] Hime
"Hey everyone, good morneveningafternoon!"
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[10:42] Hinata
There!
[10:48] Hinata
This is bad.
[10:50] Hinata
If falling onto the road to
school would be a game over,
[10:52] Hinata
and I needed to get from
one side to the other,
[10:54] Hinata
maybe the first thing is to
hook onto the stone wall,
[10:56] ---
then the overhang to get onto
the roof of that building,
[10:59] Hinata
and then try a big jump, which should
just barely let me catch the edge.
[11:04] Hinata
I think that'd work.
[11:05] Hinata
But maybe the safer way is to
just jump from the stone wall.
[11:10] Hinata
What a choice.
[11:12] Hinata
But y'know, if I can catch
onto the wall on the right,
[11:15] Hinata
the rest of the way should be simple!
[11:18] Hinata
Well, I wonder, maybe...
[11:20] Hinata
I might break some sort
of speedrunning record!
[11:32] Hinata
Yeah, it doesn't work that
way in reality, I guess.
[11:37] Hinata
Guess I'll head to school.
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[11:41] Shiro
Virtual-san is looking!
[11:44] Shiro
And so is Siro!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[11:51] Shiro
Oh, it's Kaede-chan and Miria-chan! Welcome!
[11:55] Kaede
We are so fed up!
[11:57] Miria
Can we get some trivia about baths, please?
[12:00] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
SIGN Trivia, go!
[12:05] Shiro
Baths, huh?
SIGN "Baths"
[12:10] Shiro
You know about putting a towel on your head
when you're soaking in hot water, right?
[12:14] Shiro
Well, it turns out it's not just a
tradition about where to put your towel,
[12:17] Shiro
but that there's a scientific
basis for doing it!
[12:21] Shiro
By putting a wet towel on your
head after gently wringing it out,
[12:25] Shiro
the water evaporating from
it will cool your head off!
[12:28] Shiro
It helps prevent the kind of dizziness you can
get from soaking in hot water for too long!
[12:33] Shiro
By the way, in the Edo period,
there were bathhouses on boats,
[12:37] Shiro
which is why another word for bathtub is
"yubune," with the "bune" meaning "boat."
[12:43] Kaede
Wow, really?
[12:45] Miria
Your trivia really is
always handy, Siro-chan!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Domeki Akira
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[12:54] Akira
It's nice to meet you, everyone.
[12:55] Akira
My name is Domeki Akira.
[12:58] Akira
Now, I know my name might
mean "hundred-eyed demon,"
[13:00] Akira
but I'm not a youkai,
so there are no eyes on my arm.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[13:09] Mito
When I think about the order
of guests I've had so far,
[13:11] Mito
today's will probably be that 280-year-old.
[13:16] Elu
Mito-Mito-chan!
[13:18] Mito
Hey, an elf!
[13:19] Elu
How mean!
[13:20] Elu
You know it's me, the high-minded elven
beauty from the land of elves, Elu!
[13:24] Mito
Could you give me your legal name, then?
[13:26] Elu
Snow White Paradise El Santo
Flow Wasurena Pure Pri...
[13:29] Mito
Sorry, my fault for asking.
[13:31] Mito
Well, today we're doing the ultimate "would
you rather" committee with Elu-san!
[13:35] ---
Here's the subject. Which
superpower would you rather have?
[13:38] ---
A) The power to read people's minds.
[13:40] ---
B) The power to see the future.
[13:42] ---
Elu-chan, you're not human in the
first place, so I imagine you
[13:44] ---
might have some kind of superpower, do you?
[13:46] Elu
Okay, first, discriminate much?
[13:47] Mito
What do you mean?
[13:48] Elu
But y'know, I'd like a power that'd let me
know if my forest was going to burn down.
[13:51] Mito
That's oddly specific.
[13:53] Mito
But which of these options would you prefer?
[13:55] Elu
I guess if I had to pick one,
I'd pick the ability to see the future.
[13:58] Mito
But if you could do that,
[14:00] ---
you might know if you're
going to die in five minutes,
[14:04] Mito
or that the elf forest is going
to be burned down, right?
[14:06] Elu
But I'd be able to choose my last words,
and make sure I've taken care of business...
[14:10] Mito
Things you wanted to get done?
[14:11] Mito
What specifically would that be?
[14:13] Elu
Huh... I'm not sure.
[14:14] ---
Maybe eat my favorite food?
[14:15] Elu
Well, one thing would be changing my
LINE name to "Thank you for everything."
[14:20] Mito
That is super morbid!
[14:22] Mito
Okay, it's time.
[14:23] Mito
Today's answer is A, the ability
to read people's minds!
[14:27] Elu
We didn't talk about that at all, though!
[14:30] Mito
If you control people's minds,
you'll never have to worry about a bad future!
[14:32] Mito
Live in the present!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
SIGN Special Announcement
SIGN The Sudden Appearance of a City
SIGN Overflowing with crowds
SIGN Giant Growth
SIGN Transformation
SIGN The secrets of the opening are about to be revealed!?
SIGN Coming Soon!!
[14:53] Mito
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[14:59] Unity
Unity-chan!
[15:01] Unity
Boom!
[15:02] Unity
Ootori Kohaku here!
[15:04] Unity
I'm really athletic, y'know!
[15:07] Unity
My dream is to become
an action star some day!
[15:16] Unity
Here I come!
[15:20] Unity
Secret technique,
[15:20] Unity
Curry Crou-ken!
[15:25] Unity
I'm sorry! I overdid it!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
SIGN Pen Name: Akumano Maga
[15:31] Maga
I'm Akumano Maga.
[15:33] Maga
Did you know that demons
don't really have genders?
[15:38] Maga
Maybe I'm what you all call...
[15:41] Maga
An otokonoko. Maybe!
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer.
[15:47] Hina
Gorillaga!
[15:48] Kerin
Gorilla!
[15:48] Gori
Hello!
[15:49] Hime
Want to grab some banana shakes?
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[15:55] Hina
So, what are we here for this time, Hime?
[15:58] Hime
Well, you remember that
dark elf from last time?
[16:02] Hime
And when he mentioned the legendary,
beautiful god elf known throughout the land!
[16:06] Hina
Elu-san?
[16:07] Hime
Yeah!
[16:08] Hime
And this is forest that Elu-san revived by
[16:10] ---
releasing all of her aura
through an oath and a vow!
[16:15] Hina
Look, Hime!
[16:18] Hime
More Keblins!
[16:19] Hina
Fine, then!
[16:21] Hina
Expecchan Patrol!
[16:25] Hime
That's some crazy magic you've got, again!
[16:27] Hina
Look, Hime, there's another one!
[16:31] Hime
Personal Home Security Patrol!
[16:35] Hina
That's just another way of describing a NEET!
[16:38] Hime
I messed up! And now the Keblins are here!
[16:43] Kerin
Hey, what are you guys doing?
[16:44] Both
Th-That voice...
[16:46] Both
Yamikumo Kerin!
SIGN Yami
SIGN Yamikumo
SIGN Ke
SIGN Keri
SIGN Kerin
[16:51] Kerin
You guys are here again?
[16:53] Kerin
Well, you're not getting away this time.
[16:55] Hina
N-Now hang on, Kerin, you've
got the wrong idea!
[16:58] Hina
The Keblins started attacking us!
[17:00] Hime
Hina, we've got no choice!
[17:02] Hime
After all, we're Kerin Slayers!
[17:04] Hime
It's our job to exterminate dark elves!
[17:07] Kerin
Suits me fine.
[17:08] Kerin
I'm gonna blow you both up!
[17:13] Kerin
It's the ultimate super
maximum magic, Buchitema!
[17:16] Kerin
Get out of Elu-san's forest, you two!
[17:19] Hime
We'll have to use our
ultimate combo attack, then!
[17:23] Hime
Let's go, Hina!
[17:24] Hina
I get what you mean, Hime!
[17:26] Hime & Hina
In the name of the Girly Girl Empire!
[17:29] Hime
This hand of mine is burning pink!
[17:32] Hina
Its loud roar tells us to grasp success!
[17:35] Hime & Hina
Erupting Sekiha Hao Ken!
[17:39] Kerin
Blast 'em!
[17:42] Hime & Hina
Hao!
[17:47] Elu
Hold it right there!
[17:49] Everybody
That voice... could it be?!
SIGN Sister!
[18:01] Uma
Can you hear me out, Sister?
[18:04] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[18:05] Uma
There's this girl I want to tell how I—
[18:07] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[18:13] Sister
What is it?
[18:14] Sora
I think I've put on weight by
snacking at night too much!
[18:17] Sora
Oh man, what am I gonna do?!
[18:19] Sister
You've lost to the sweet temptation
of late night snacks, I see.
[18:24] Sora
Yeah! The more I try to resist, the better
it tastes when I finally eat something!
[18:29] Sister
Let me suggest a snack that should
[18:31] ---
fulfill that sensation while also
limiting how guilty you feel.
[18:33] Sora
Really?!
[18:34] Sister
It's made from a type of
algae so it's full of
[18:37] ---
minerals and nutrients:
agar jelly with anmitsu syrup.
[18:39] Sister
It's got a lot of dietary fiber to
suppress carbohydrate absorption,
[18:43] ---
which should also help relieve your hunger.
[18:45] Sora
I get it!
[18:46] Sora
I'm gonna get my fill of
agar jelly starting today!
[18:51] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[18:53] Uma
Jiggly agar jelly!
SIGN Sister!
[19:00] Kaede
Why, why?! Virtual-san is looking!
[19:05] Shiro
Well, we've got a letter here.
[19:08] Shiro
It's from pen name "Urban Riemann."
[19:10] Everybody
Thanks for writing!
[19:13] Shiro
"I'm getting tired of being an officer worker
and thinking about a change in careers."
[19:17] Shiro
"What kind of occupation
should I pursue next?"
[19:20] Shiro
"By the way, my hobbies are gourmet dining,
reading, and walking."
[19:26] Shiro
So he writes, and he's
talking about jobs, right?
[19:29] Shiro
Do you all have any kind
of jobs that you like
[19:31] Shiro
that show up in anime or manga?
[19:34] Akari
Me, me! Vampire!
SIGN Favorite jobs from
anime and manga
[19:35] Hime
Papaya?
[19:37] Hina
Sounds tasty!
[19:37] Akari
No!
[19:39] Akari
I mean, I like papaya.
[19:41] Akari
I said vampire!
[19:42] Somebody
Vampires!
[19:43] Hina
Oh, right!
[19:44] Hime
I wanna be, like...
[19:45] Hime
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh!
[19:46] Shiro
A ninja!
[19:47] Hime
I wanna be zipping and zapping all over!
[19:49] Hinata
Then I'm gonna be king of the pirates.
[19:51] Hime
Sounds good!
[19:53] Mito
I think I'd like to be a mage.
[19:56] Shiro
Mito-mito, you give me more
of a sage vibe than a mage.
[20:00] Mito
I suppose that'd work, too.
[20:02] Shiro
I think Akari-chan would make a good
gadabout, since her costume is so cute...
[20:07] Akari
For real?
[20:07] Akari
What's a gadabout do, anyway?
[20:09] Shiro
Well, they have really high luck stats.
[20:12] Akari
Luck shats?
[20:14] Hime
Shats?
[20:15] Shiro
No!
[20:15] Hinata
Akari-chan...
[20:17] Akari
Sorry, sorry, sorry!
[20:20] Mito
You're so bad, Akari-san.
[20:22] Akari
I thought she was talking
about high level shats!
[20:25] Hime
I did, too!
[20:27] Shiro
I think I'd be a white wizard.
[20:30] Hime
That's perfect!
[20:31] Hina
I'd wanna get healed by you!
[20:33] Hina
I think I'd want to be a gambler,
something that's kind of cool!
[20:38] Hinata
We've got a millionaire!
[20:39] Hina
Suzuki plays hard! You know?
[20:44] Shiro
So what kind of job should Urban Riemann,
who sent in the letter, get?
SIGN What kind of job should
Urban Riemann get?
[20:50] Shiro
His hobbies are gourmet dining,
reading, and walking.
[20:53] Mito
Dining, reading, and walking?
[20:55] Mito
Is there a job where you eat?
[20:57] Hime
Sounds good to me!
[20:58] Shiro
Like a professional speed eater?
[21:00] Hime
Oh, I love those contests!
[21:03] Mirai
But what if he loses weight doing it?
[21:05] Hina
He could be a big eater who's skinny?
[21:07] Hime
Would that be a good fit for TV?
[21:09] Hime
Maybe?
[21:10] Mito
For walking, he could walk
around while eating.
[21:12] Mito
But that's a recipe for
smacking into something.
[21:14] Hime
Smackeroonie!
[21:16] Akari
Say that again, Tanaka?
[21:17] Hime
Sma... don't wanna.
[21:19] Hime
Don't try and make me say that sorta thing!
[21:20] Mito
She caught on... well done.
[21:24] Shiro
Well, that's it for this
week, so until next week...
[21:29] Shiro
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Weatheroid Type A Airi (Ponko)
[23:10] Airi
Good evening everybody!
[23:13] Airi
I'm Type A Airi, the weatheroid!
[23:15] Airi
I warned everybody about the cold
weather coming up the other day
[23:19] Airi
and ended up catching a cold myself!
[23:21] Airi
It's still possible, even
when you're an android!
[23:23] Airi
My nose won't stop dripping oil!
[23:24] Airi
Are any of you feeling under the weather?
[23:27] Airi
When you're feeling sick in virtual town,
it's called restarting.
[23:30] Airi
So next time you're feeling bad,
try restarting, and hang in there!
[23:32] Airi
Next time, it's "PP Dance Festival."
SIGN Next Time
"PP Dance Festival"
[23:35] Airi
Virtual-san will be looking next week, too!
E6 - PP Dance Festival
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Peanut
Y'know, Oda Nobunaga used to
call Hideyoshi a "bald rat."
[00:07] Uma
Yo! Bald peanut!
[00:08] Peanut
I'm not bald, you horsey bastard!
[00:10] Uma
Hey, hey!
[00:13] Hina
There's a gym and this huge library.
[00:16] Hina
This dorm is really something! I love it!
[00:19] Shiro
Considering how big it is, maybe there's
an entrance to a secret room somewhere!
[00:23] Hime
Like the kind where you say
a password for it to open?
[00:26] Hime
Hm... Open, Comăneci!
[00:29] Hime
Wow, something actually came out! Awesome!
[00:33] Hinata
What the heck is this? Holy cow!
It's a whole secret base!
[00:37] Hinata
So cool! What's it for?
What's the special mission?
[00:39] Akari
Oh, Hinata's hype meter is maxed out!
[00:43] Mito
Tanaka, take it away.
[00:44] Hime
Aye-aye, sir!
[00:45] ---
This is being called "Operation:
Let's All Work Hard to
[00:47] ---
Actually Do the Title Call
so the Opening Can Play!"
[00:50] ---
Ready, and...
[00:51] Everyone
Virtual-san is looking!
[02:37] Kaede
I choose you! Virtual-san is looking.
[02:50] Kaede
Last week ended up turning into
a talent contest, somehow.
[02:53] Ryo
Especially in Miria-chan's case.
[02:54] Miria
It's fine! Those mini-mes
were really cute, right?
[02:57] Haruto
We'd be in dire straights
with any more pink fools!
[03:00] Miria
Oh, right! I came up with a new plan!
[03:03] Kaede
Just what we needed!
Let's hear it, Miria-chan!
[03:06] Miria
I call it "Operation: Every Rose Has
Its Toxins! Deadly Poison Cooking!"
[03:11] Haruto
Cooking? You maniac, are you
trying to get the chief to—?!
[03:14] Miria
Shh!
[03:14] Kaede
Trying to get me to do what?
[03:16] Miria
Well, Kaede-chan, since we'll need to take
our time and have a briefing on the plan,
[03:20] Miria
maybe you should make
some cookies beforehand!
[03:22] Ryo
Miria-chan, you can't—
[03:24] Kaede
Cookies, huh! It's been a while!
[03:27] Kaede
I'm gonna do my best, then!
[03:29] ---
Which way was the kitchen again?
[03:30] Kaede
I think this is the first time
I've cooked on this battleship!
[03:32] Haruto
You pink fool! How could you
incite the chief like this?!
[03:35] Miria
Shut up! You know as well as I do how
powerful Kaede-chan's deadly poison cooking is!
[03:39] Ryo
Miria-chan, you can't...
[03:41] Ryo
Our sweet chief is going to become a vessel
for something from another reality...
[03:44] Miria
But if we feed the stuff to our
enemies, they'll be totally toast!
[03:46] Haruto
You do make a type of sense, but...
[03:50] Ryo
What was that?!
[03:51] Haruto
An enemy attack?! Damn them!
[03:53] Miria
No! The explosion came from the kitchen!
[03:57] Ryo
That was the chief!
[03:58] Miria
Oh, no! I never bothered to look
into how Kaede-chan actually cooks!
[04:02] Haruto
At this rate, the battleship will be scuttled
before we can feed our foes the cookies!
[04:06] Kaede
Sorry for scaring you all!
[04:08] Kaede
It's been a while, so I tried my best!
[04:10] Kaede
The cookies are ready, though!
[04:12] Haruto
Such an aura! Is it dark matter?!
[04:15] Miria
Talk about intense.
[04:17] Kaede
Come on! Eat up! And we'll go over the plan.
[04:20] Miria
Kaede-chan, the plan is to give
these cookies to our enemies,
[04:24] Miria
and then take them out while
they're enjoying the snack!
[04:27] Ryo
Okay, good explanation!
[04:28] Kaede
Oh, so that's the plan!
[04:31] Kaede
I'll make some more, then!
[04:32] Kaede
That way you all can eat these!
[04:35] Kaede
Go on, don't be shy!
[04:36] Haruto
Hey, pink fool, we're gonna
have to brace ourselves.
[04:39] Miria
Harutrash, you...
[04:42] Miria
I guess it'd be rude to
Kaede-chan, otherwise.
[04:44] Miria
Ready to do this, Ryo-kun?
[04:47] Everybody
Thanks for the cookies.
SIGN 1 Minute Later
[04:54] Kaede
Guys! Who did this to you?!
[04:57] Miria
I knew my plan was a good one.
[05:04] Kaede
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
[05:12] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
[05:16] Grandma
Choda no Retsu.
SIGN Today's Phrase:
Choda no Retsu
SIGN Grandma
[05:19] Banner
As in, a particularly long line.
[05:21] Banner
Are there any places you can think
of when it comes to long lines?
[05:26] Banner
For me, it's movie theaters.
[05:29] Grandma
In the old days, no matter where you went,
they used to always be really crowded.
[05:33] Grandma
You'd end up having to stand to watch!
SIGN Grandma
[05:35] Grandma
That was actually something that
was allowed in theaters back then.
[05:41] Grandma
This was on top of doing
double and triple features.
[05:44] Grandma
A particular memory I have
about going to the movies
[05:47] ---
is the music acts that would play during
the intermissions for double features.
[05:52] Grandma
This was actually a thing, in the old days.
[05:54] Grandma
The screen would rise up,
and there'd be a stage behind it.
[05:57] Grandma
With performances by singers and bands.
[06:00] Grandma
They'd be on standby behind the screen
until it was time for them to perform,
[06:06] Grandma
so they could actually enjoy the movie
from back there while they were waiting!
SIGN Grandma
[06:11] Grandma
And then after the movie ended,
they'd play in the theater again.
[06:15] Grandma
By the way, a movie that made a big
impression on me at the time was Mothra!
[06:23] Grandma
I'm a bit like her myself, nowadays.
Whoosh! You know? Whoosh!
SIGN Grandma
[06:31] Grandma
Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh!
[06:37] Grandma
Whoosh!
SIGN Grandma
[06:39] Grandma
Whoosh!
[06:42] Grandma
Whoosh!
[06:49] Akari
V-V-Virtual-san is looking!
[06:53] Aoi
Y-You don't have to look, if you want.
[06:57] Aoi
But I want you to.
[06:59] Aoi
Virtual-san is looking!
[07:07] Gori
What's the matter?
[07:09] Aoi
Nothing.
[07:11] Gori
If you don't mind talking to
a gorilla, you can tell me.
[07:14] Aoi
Thank you, Gori-chan.
[07:21] Aoi
See, I...
[07:22] Gori
Hello?
[07:24] Aoi
...wanna go into space.
[07:28] Gori
Hello!
SIGN Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[07:33] Gori
Hello.
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[07:38] Hinata
This is bad! Real bad! But I can't panic.
[07:42] Hinata
It'll be rough, though.
[07:44] Hinata
There are two generators
I still need to repair.
[07:47] Hinata
Probably on the other side
of this bridge, but...
[07:49] Hinata
But should I really go across?
[07:51] Hinata
It'd mean leaving the other
survivors on this side.
[07:55] Hinata
In that other round, I let them
all die and survived by myself.
[07:59] Hinata
Maybe that's why I have no friends.
[08:02] Hinata
But if the killer crosses the
bridge, they'll be able to
[08:05] ---
see me in the distance,
and I'll be dead in no time!
[08:08] Hinata
Dead or alive!
[08:13] Hinata
Okay, let's do it!
[08:14] Hinata
Even if it means betraying the others,
I've gotta find those generators!
[08:19] Hinata
Crap, I ran.
[08:21] Hinata
I'm gonna die!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[08:27] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble, Akari-chan!
[08:33] Hime
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[08:40] Akari
What is it, Hime?
[08:42] Hime
Man, I'm rusty! Here, read this!
[08:44] Hime
Just read it already!
[08:45] Akari
Okay, okay!
[08:48] Akari
"Hello, Akari-san."
[08:48] Hime
H'lo.
[08:49] Akari
Hello!
[08:50] Hime
H'lo!
[08:50] Akari
"The other day, I heard
rumors that a friend was
[08:53] ---
badmouthing me, and got depressed about it."
[08:55] Akari
"These weren't things
said directly to my face,
[08:58] ---
but I thought this person and I were good
friends, so it came as a huge shock."
[09:02] Akari
"I've had trouble talking
to them ever since."
[09:05] ---
"What do you think I should do?"
SIGN Problem: Badmouthed by a friend
[09:07] Hime
That's sad!
[09:10] Akari
Hey Hime, try badmouthing me!
[09:13] Hime
Badmouth you?!
[09:14] Akari
Yeah.
[09:15] Hime
Y-You got black panties!
[09:16] Akari
Uh, hang on, is that supposed to be bad?
[09:18] Hime
W-Was it supposed to be?
[09:20] Akari
Don't you always show
off your panties, Hime?
[09:22] Hime
Yes, I am! Here, see?
[09:24] Hime
Whoo.
[09:25] Hime
Whacha think?
[09:28] Hime
Uh, Mirai-san? Hey, are you there?
[09:30] Hime
Mirai-san!
[09:32] Yami
How about a rap battle where you both
just get it all out in the open?
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[09:36] Hikari
That's not a bad idea!
[09:38] Yami
If you're gonna talk crap to someone else,
[09:40] Yami
you may as well say it to the
person you've got an issue with.
[09:43] Hikari
Wow, Yami-chan, you're making sense!
[09:46] Yami
Oh, damn, that's kind of OOC.
[09:50] Hime
Hello? Hello! Earth to Mirai-san!
[09:54] Akari
Oh man, something smells a lot like panties.
[09:57] Hime
Smells?!
[09:58] Akari
Y'know, like pumpkins. I wonder what it is?
[10:02] Akari
Anyway, pen name "Aruto-kun"!
[10:04] Akari
Here's the bottom line!
[10:07] Hime
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
[10:11] Akari
You need to embrace your friend.
[10:13] ---
Period!
[10:15] Hime
So fast!
[10:16] Hime
So the idea is to shut the person who
was saying bad things up, huh?! Awesome!
[10:21] Akari
Tanaka, do you know what I mean
when I say "embrace" them?
[10:24] Hime
Embrace? No. I'm just a little girl, so nope.
[10:27] Akari
Well, what you do is...
SIGN and then their so
then you the over
to , and then gets ,
and you put into
with aimed at...
SIGN ° Since it was full of , this scene was
[10:34] Hime
I get it! It's some kind
of beeping party, right?
[10:37] Akari
Bingo!
[10:38] Hime
Okay, I'm gonna go to the bookstore
and look up some books on beeping!
[10:41] Akari
Wait!
[10:42] Akari
Wait, wait! You're too young
to mess with that stuff!
[10:44] Akari
They won't even let you into
that corner of the book store!
[10:47] Hime
Beep, peep, pee, Peenut-kun! Yeah!
[10:51] Peanuts
That's not how you spell my name!
[11:01] Hinata
Hello, everybody!
[11:04] Hinata
You keeping it virtual out there?
[11:05] Hinata
Because it's time for Virtual Radio!
[11:08] Hinata
We've got another virtual banger
for you today. You ready for this?
[11:13] Hinata
This one...
[11:14] Hinata
has got a wild style, but refined production,
a real goriginal song!
[11:17] Hinata
The yearning in the lyrics left me
with a g-ape-ing hole in my heart,
[11:22] Hinata
a real miraculous, heart-string-twinging,
lovely, drumming ook-ook song!
[11:26] Hinata
With his natural strength,
he gives you wild power!
[11:28] Hinata
Let me throw it on for you.
[11:30] Hinata
This is Virtual Gorilla's "Like a Gorilla!"
SIGN "Like a Gorilla"
By: Virtual Gorilla
[12:02] Hinata
Now that's a nice virtual song!
[12:05] Hinata
That was "Like A Gorilla" by Virtual Gorilla!
[12:09] Hinata
See you next time, gori gori master!
[12:19] Toya
Yeah! Virtual-san is looking! Ready, go!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[12:27] Shiro
Oh, Iroha-chan! Welcome!
[12:30] Kaede
I am so fed up!
[12:33] Kaede
Can I get some trivia about
strawberries, please?
SIGN "Strawberries"
[12:41] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
[12:43] Shiro
Did you know that strawberries
aren't actually berries?
[12:50] Iroha
Mm, I could go for more.
[12:53] Iroha
Give me another.
SIGN Trivia, go!
[13:00] Shiro
Well, two strawberries contain about as
much Vitamin C as your typical lemon.
[13:05] Shiro
But that's if we're talking
about typically-sized ones.
[13:08] Shiro
In 2015, the Guinness World Record
for biggest strawberry weighed
[13:14] ---
250 grams, and was 12 cm long and
8 cm wide, like a meat bun!
[13:21] Shiro
It makes you wonder how many lemons
worth of vitamin C that one had, huh?
[13:24] Shiro
And it turns out that this record
is held by a farmer in Fukuoka!
[13:29] Shiro
And did you know that strawberries
are part of the Rosaceae family?
[13:32] Shiro
Belonging to the same family as roses
adds a bit of wonder, doesn't it?
[13:36] Shiro
Now you know those little things
that poke out of a strawberry?
[13:42] Shiro
You might think, aren't the
thorns on roses on the stem?
[13:46] Shiro
Well, it turns out, the part of the
strawberries we eat are considered part of the stem!
[13:50] Shiro
And the little grain things on
strawberries are actually their seeds!
[13:57] Iroha
Wow, really?
[13:59] ---
Your trivia is always handy, Siro-chan!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Satou-san
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[14:11] Satou
I am so tired today...
[14:14] Satou
I know!
[14:15] Satou
I can watch Virtual-san!
[14:18] Satou
But I'm so sleepy.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[14:25] Mito
Now then, who did I manage to drag in today?
[14:33] Rin
Mito-san!
[14:34] Rin
Do you know where I can find
some shredded-looking gentlemen?
[14:36] Mito
ShizuRin-senpai, calm down.
[14:38] Mito
That was just a lie I told you to
get you to show up for the segment!
[14:41] Mito
Now then, ShizuRin-senpai, it's time for the
the ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
[14:45] Rin
But...
[14:46] Mito
Which would you rather see in person?
[14:48] Mito
A) Cyber Girl Siro-chan changing clothes.
[14:51] Mito
Or B) Tokino Sora-chan changing clothes.
[14:53] Rin
I'm watching them change?!
[14:54] Mito
That's right.
[14:55] Rin
Well, I'd like to see more of Siro-san,
[14:57] ---
but since I'm friends with
Sora, I guess I'd pick B?
[15:00] Mito
Oh, B, then?
[15:01] Mito
I figured that you'd be so fixated on abs
that you'd go for that one, ShizuRin-Senpai.
[15:04] Rin
Good point. I guess it's because... y'know?
[15:05] ---
How Sora-san sings so hard?
[15:07] Mito
True enough.
[15:08] Rin
It makes me wonder how
ripped her abs must be.
[15:10] Mito
Yeah. Idols have to be in shape, after all.
[15:12] Mito
But then again,
Siro-chan is an idol cadet herself.
[15:15] Rin
Yeah.
[15:16] Mito
But Siro-chan kind of
gives off a fluffy feel.
[15:18] Rin
Now that you mention it,
I bet her tummy is amazing.
[15:20] Mito
It just comes down to
different types of appeal.
[15:22] ---
She's the good kind of curvy.
[15:24] Mito
Where there's just enough meat,
that's Siro-san!
SIGN *This is her personal opinion
[15:27] Mito
These are crucial details.
[15:28] Rin
I kind of feel like we've got
a difference of opinion here.
[15:29] Mito
Maybe.
[15:30] Mito
But y'know, if the network is letting us talk
about this, I wonder if they'll let us see it?
[15:36] Rin
Oh, you're getting my hopes up.
[15:37] Mito
We can actually watch them change, right?
[15:40] Mito
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
[15:41] Rin
Ding dong ding dong...
[15:41] Mito
That being the case the answer is...
[15:43] Mito
A! Watching Cyber Girl
Siro-chan change, in person!
[15:46] Rin
I kind of want to know why you
bothered asking me on, then?
[15:48] Mito
And now the committee is closed!
[15:50] Mito
If you want to see Siro-san change,
I can arrange it for 10,000 yen!
[15:52] Mito
If that's the right answer,
we can actually show it, right?
[15:54] Mito
Ask the network if we can put—
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[16:00] Elu
Virtual-san is looking, el-el!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[16:07] Unity
It's okay! I broke it, so I can fix it!
[16:11] Unity
No real reason to be sure of that, but...
[16:12] Unity
That doesn't look right.
[16:15] Unity
How am I gonna explain this to Dad?
[16:18] Unity
I don't know where people get the idea that
I wreck any machine I touch, anyway.
[16:21] Unity
Shouldn't a combat robot
be more durable, anyway?
[16:25] Unity
Let's see...
[16:27] Unity
No! Calm down, just wait a second, and...
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[16:37] Lulu
Good-lulu morning everyone!
SIGN Pen Name: Ayamaki Lulu
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[16:39] Lulu
I'm the virtual fallen
angel idol, Ayamaki Lulu.
[16:42] Lulu
My favorite food is apple pie.
[16:45] Lulu
My least favorite is basically
all fresh vegetables.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer.
[16:53] Hime & Hina
In the name of the Girly Girl Empire!
[16:55] Kerin
Blast 'em!
[16:56] Elu
Hold it right there!
[16:57] Everybody
That voice...
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[17:02] Kerin
Elu-san?!
[17:03] Hina
We finally meet!
[17:04] Hina
The legendary, beautiful god elf!
[17:06] Hina
Eru-san's here!
[17:11] Hime
What was that?! Why?
[17:13] Kerin
What did you two just do?
[17:15] Hime
I didn't do anything!
[17:16] Hina
Wait, was it me?
[17:18] Hime
What just happened?
[17:19] Hime
Try remembering and doing it again!
[17:22] Hina
The legendary, beautiful god elf!
[17:26] Hime
Nothing's happening.
[17:27] Hime
It seemed like lightning magic before.
[17:29] Hina
True, it looked kind of like the
light of El Thunder, didn't it?
[17:35] Hime
I've got it!
[17:36] Hime
"Elu-san's here," is what you thought
[17:37] Hime
and "Elu-san's here," is what you said,
[17:39] Hime
but it sounded like
"El Thunder" for some reason!
[17:42] Kerin
Why only me?!
[17:44] Hina
Oh, sorry!
[17:45] Hina
Hime, cut that out! You can't say El Thunder!
[17:50] Kerin
I'm not a lightning rod, damn it!
[17:53] Hime
Wow, this is really easy to do!
[17:55] Hime
El Thunder!
[17:57] Kerin
Please stop!
[17:59] Hina
Stop it! Kerin's life points
dropped to 0 a long time ago!
[18:02] Kerin
After three hard months, I was
finally able to meet Elu-san.
[18:07] Kerin
So why am I being fried with
lightning like this?
[18:10] Hime
I didn't mean anything by it. My bad, my bad!
[18:13] Kerin
But the lightning has cracked the statue.
[18:18] Elu
Hi everybody, and good elfning!
[18:21] Elu
I'm here from the land of elves,
the high-minded elven beauty, Elu!
[18:27] Kerin
The real Elu-san's here!
[18:35] Hime
Huh, what happened to Kerin?
[18:37] Hina
He went somewhere...
[18:38] Elu
Was someone else here?
SIGN Kerin Slayer
SIGN To Be Continued
SIGN Sister!
[18:53] Uma
I really hope you can hear
me out today, Sister.
[18:55] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[18:57] Uma
Well there's—
[18:57] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[19:03] Sister
What is it?
[19:05] Sora
I keep forgetting to lock
the door when I go out.
[19:07] Sora
How can I stop being so forgetful?
[19:10] Sister
It sounds like you're
just not cautious enough.
[19:12] Sora
Yeah...
[19:12] Sister
I understand. I know what
you can do to solve this.
[19:16] Sora
Really?!
[19:17] Sister
Change your phone's lock
screen to the keyhole.
[19:20] Sora
What do you mean?
[19:21] Sister
When you're on your way out,
you'll likely give it a casual glance.
[19:23] Sister
But if your lock screen is the keyhole,
if you've forgotten, it'll remind you.
[19:29] Sora
I get it! When I get home, I better
take a picture of the lock!
[19:36] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[19:38] Uma
Sora-Sora! You dropped your key!
SIGN Sister!
[19:44] Peanuts
I wanna be popular!
[19:46] Peanuts
Virtual-san is looking.
[19:50] Hinata
'Kay, we've got a letter here.
[19:52] Hinata
From pen name "King of Kings."
[19:55] Everybody
Thanks for writing!
[19:57] Hinata
"I have a question for you all."
[19:59] Hinata
"If you were the kings of a country,
what kind of nation would you build?"
[20:05] Hinata
He asks.
[20:05] Hina
Good question!
SIGN If you were king,
what would your
kingdom be like?
[20:07] Akari
If I was royalty, I'd want to make
a law where wherever I went out,
[20:13] Akari
I'd be nude!
[20:17] Mito
Please stop making me want things!
[20:19] Shiro
Oh, me! Me, me, me, me!
[20:20] Hinata
Go ahead, Siro-chan.
[20:21] Shiro
If I was an awesome king, I'd make it
so that men could wear skirts, too.
[20:29] Hime
I like the sound of that!
[20:29] Akari
I think they do that in England!
[20:31] Hina
If I was queen, let's see...
[20:34] Hina
I'd order anime adaptations
for all my favorite manga!
[20:37] Hime
Wow! That'd be crazy!
[20:39] Hina
By my command!
[20:39] Hikari
That's awesome! I love it!
[20:41] Mito
Silence, all of you.
[20:43] Mito
Show some royal dignity.
[20:45] Hina
Lower your heads, all of you!
[20:47] Mito
Let's see...
[20:48] Mito
I think I'd make everyone
carry around 50 kg weights,
[20:51] ---
form a line, and then wander the desert,
[20:54] Mito
with only the survivors being able to return
to society, so that it would be more fit.
[20:57] Hime
That's so scary!
[20:59] Shiro
Like some kind of battle royal?
[21:00] Akari
That's really crazy!
[21:01] Mito
Something along those lines.
[21:03] Hinata
Okay, I'll wrap things up!
[21:05] Everybody
Yeah!
[21:06] Hinata
I hereby declare that that
is all for this week.
[21:09] Shiro
Yeah!
[21:09] Hinata
So, until next time,
[21:12] All
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Kitakami Futaba
SIGN Yamato Iori
[22:52] Futaba
Goodtaba evening, Kitakami Futaba here.
[22:55] Iori
Good morning, Yamato Iori here.
[22:57] Futaba
They said we could say whatever we
want during the next episode preview,
[23:00] ---
so what should we talk about?
[23:02] Iori
How about you show off your tongue
twister skill, Futaba-chan?
[23:06] Futaba
Sounds good! Give me one, come on!
[23:08] Iori
Okay, how about, "She sells
sea shells by the she—"
[23:12] Iori
Aw, I messed up.
[23:14] Futaba
No you didn't!
[23:15] Iori
I didn't?!
SIGN Next Time
"I'm Salty"
SIGN Next time is "I'm Salty."
[23:19] Futaba
Until next week—
[23:20] Both
Virtual-san is looking!
E7 - I'm Salty
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Peanut
They say those dark bits on a
banana are called "sugar spots."
[00:05] Uma
Hey, hey, hey! So where are
your sugar spots, Peanut?
[00:08] Peanut
Peanuts are salty! You horsey bastard!
[00:10] Uma
Hey, hey!
[00:12] Hinata
Hello and good evening everyone.
[00:15] Everybody
Good evening!
[00:18] Hinata
It seems Virtual-san - Looking
is getting good reviews.
[00:20] Everyone
That's nice!
[00:22] Hinata
And apparently there's an off-season
typhoon headed our way.
[00:25] Everyone
That's nice!
[00:27] Hinata
Nah, that's not happening!
[00:29] Hinata
Anyway, Akari-chan, did you cut your hair?
[00:31] Akari
Yeah!
[00:33] Hinata
And I heard that the opening song
is going to change this week?
[00:35] Shiro
Yep! The six of us are going
to be singing the new one.
[00:39] Hime
Which means you're going to be singing, too.
[00:41] Hinata
Really? What kind of song is it?
[00:44] Shiro
It's a cute, but rousing kind of song.
[00:47] Akari
It puts you in a sexy mood.
[00:50] Hime
It's a song that makes you
wanna do the Comăneci!
[00:52] Hina
It's the kind of wonderfully sleepy song
that you want to stick under your pillow.
[00:55] Mito
It's a song where you just
start to want to rap.
[00:57] Hinata
Everyone seems to have
a different take on it.
[01:00] Hinata
Well, to all our viewers, let us
know what you think at #virtualsan.
[01:06] Hinata
Let's get to it, here is...
[01:09] Everyone
"I Need More Love"!
[02:57] Hime & Hina
Virtual-san is...
[02:58] Hime & Hina
Looking!
[03:06] Robo
Wh-What is this?!
SIGN Mob A
[03:08] Mob A
So... you're saying that when you
woke up, you had become a robot?
[03:16] Robo
Yeah.
[03:18] Mob A
And that yesterday, you were
totally normal, like me.
SIGN Mob A
[03:21] Robo
Yeah.
[03:22] Mob B
Turning into a robot overnight
seems kind of impossible.
SIGN Mob B
[03:26] Robo
Yeah, I know!
[03:29] Both
So why...?
[03:30] Mob A
The only possible reason I can think of...
SIGN Mob A
[03:32] Mob A
is them!
[03:34] Robo
Ah...
[03:35] Hime
Hey! Where are we?
[03:37] Hina
Everybody seems to have the same face.
[03:40] Mito
Are they actually even people?
[03:41] Hinata
Man...
SIGN To Be Continued
SIGN After-School V Time
[03:52] Akari
What nice weather!
[03:54] Akari
Man, I'm bored.
[03:57] Akari
So bored!
[03:58] Hina
Right?
[03:58] Mito
Really? I think that having a bit of down
time like this serves its own purpose.
[04:03] Akari
If I says I'm bored then I'm bored!
[04:05] Akari
Hina-chan, if you don't say something,
I'm gonna stare at you until you do!
[04:11] Hina
Then, I'll stare back! Stare!
[04:16] Akari
Class Prez, I'm not bored anymore!
[04:19] Mito
Okay, okay.
[04:20] Mito
How about this, then?
[04:22] Mito
Why don't we brainstorm ideas for things we
can do and then call them out, one by one.
[04:26] Hina
I'm not sure I can think of anything, though.
[04:29] Mito
We could pretend that the strings
for a ceiling lamp are a speed bag,
[04:31] Mito
or use the reverberation from a fan to talk
like aliens. Granted, those are a bit cliché.
[04:34] Hina
I've definitely heard of them.
[04:36] ---
And I dunno if either is
quite right for the moment.
[04:38] Akari
Try it.
[04:39] Mito
What, m-me?
[04:40] Akari
I'll do the buzzing thing that fans do, okay?
[04:43] Mito
All right.
[04:44] Akari
Vrrrm... vrrrm... vrrm...
[04:44] Mito
Hello! Mirai Akari here!
[04:48] Mito
What do you think? Sounds like you, huh?
[04:51] Mito
Hina-chan, you should try, too. Do me.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Factory Chief Nanoko
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[05:00] Nanoko
Factory Chief Nanoko here!
[05:02] Nanoko
Let's enjoy working together
at a legitimate business,
[05:05] Nanoko
where we mass-produce bunnies.
[05:13] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
[05:17] Grandma
Nashi no tsubute.
SIGN Grandma
SIGN Today's Phrase:
Nashi no tsubute
[05:20] Banner
That's the phrase.
[05:22] Banner
It comes from how sometimes, you never
receive a reply to correspondence.
[05:25] Banner
Like how you can toss a pebble,
and it won't ever come back to you.
[05:30] Grandma
In the old days, we used to only
have phones at home, after all.
[05:33] Grandma
So if you had any plans or sensitive
matters to discuss with friends,
[05:37] ---
you couldn't do it on the phone,
thanks to your family's prying eyes.
[05:40] Grandma
And if your friends ever moved far away,
[05:43] ---
you could generally expect
to never hear from them again.
SIGN Grandma
[05:46] Grandma
To put it in terms of the
modern smartphone ecosystem,
[05:49] ---
it'd be like LINE messages
that are never read,
[05:52] ---
or tweets that never
receive replies or likes.
[05:56] Grandma
Those would be nashi no tsubute.
[05:58] Grandma
Incidentally, I, Kobayashi Sachiko,
have an official Twitter as well!
SIGN Grandma
[06:03] Grandma
@Sachiko_5884.
[06:08] Grandma
The 5884 can be read as
"KO BA YA SHI," you see.
[06:12] Grandma
Also, make sure to tweet with
#virtualgrandmother and let me know
[06:16] ---
what you think of the show!
SIGN Grandma
[06:18] Grandma
I'll be waiting to hear from you.
[06:22] Grandma
Although I won't be replying all that much,
[06:24] ---
so that too, will be like nashi no tsubute!
[06:30] Grandma
But I will be reading them, okay?
[06:31] ---
I'll be self-searching,
and I might end up liking them.
SIGN Grandma
[06:40] Shiro
Virtual-san is looking.
[06:46] Gori
Virtual-san is looking. Hello!
[06:52] Aoi
Gori-chan, let's play Red Light, Green Light!
[06:56] Gori
Hello!
[06:57] Aoi
Green light...
[06:59] Aoi
Red light!
[07:01] Aoi
Huh?
[07:02] Peanut
It's me, Peanut!
[07:04] Aoi
Where'd Gori-chan go?!
[07:06] Peanut
I ate him!
[07:08] Gori
Hello!
[07:10] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[07:12] Gori
Hi!
[07:15] Aoi
Green light...
[07:17] Aoi
Red light!
[07:18] Aoi
Huh?
[07:19] Peanut
It's me, Peanut!
[07:21] Aoi
Where's Gori-chan?
[07:23] Peanut
Here he is!
[07:25] Gori
Hello!
[07:26] Call
Fuji Aoi! Hello.
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[07:31] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble, Akari-chan!
SIGN Big trouble, Akari-chan!
SIGN Whoa, whoa, whoa... hello there.
[07:43] Akari
What is it, Hime-chan?
[07:45] Hime
Akari-chan, we've got really big trouble!
[07:48] Mirai
Let's see here.
[07:50] Hime
Someone with the pen name
"Mimi-chan" is worried!
[07:52] Hime
Stop clonking around and here!
Read this, would you? Go on!
[07:54] Akari
Sorry about that. Let's see,
"Hello, Akari-san." Hello!
[07:56] Hime
Hello.
[07:56] Akari
Hello.
[07:57] Hime
Hello.
[07:58] Akari
"Whenever I'm using my PC and try
to put something in the USB port,
[08:01] ---
I always end up the wrong way around."
[08:03] Akari
"How can I stop doing this?"
[08:05] Hime
Oh, I totally do that all the time!
SIGN Problem: Inserting USB connectors backwards
[08:07] Akari
I get the feeling!
[08:07] Hime
That happens to everybody.
[08:08] Akari
Yep. It's a pretty common,
low-key frustration.
[08:10] Hime
I totally get it!
[08:12] Akari
But how to fix it? Hmm...
[08:15] Hime
Hey, Mirai-san?
[08:17] Hime
Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[08:19] Yami
The problem is you rely on USB too much.
[08:21] ---
Just memorize the stuff you need!
[08:23] Hikari
But that's so much less efficient!
[08:26] Hikari
I'd probably just check the connector
every time, before inserting it.
[08:29] Yami
That's way too much work!
[08:32] Yami
The real problem is getting dependent
on technological advances!
[08:35] Yami
It wasn't that long ago that
USB tech didn't even exist!
[08:39] Hikari
You've got a point, but...
[08:42] Hikari
Oh, Akari! Take it from here!
[08:45] Hime
Hello! Earth to Mirai-san?
[08:50] Akari
Sorry, I'm back now.
[08:52] Hime
Oh, welcome home.
[08:52] Akari
Okay!
[08:55] Akari
Pen name Mimi-chan!
[08:57] Akari
Here's the bottom line!
[09:00] Hime
Is she going to get to it?
Her bottom... line?
[09:04] Akari
You need your own company!
[09:07] Hime
A c-company?!
[09:08] Akari
Yep! Mimi-chan is being troubled by something
as mundane as USB accessories, right?
[09:13] Akari
That's a pretty common
problem that everyone has!
[09:16] Hime
Yeah, that's true.
[09:17] Akari
Which means it's a business opportunity!
[09:20] Akari
Mimi-chan will practice connecting
USB stuff until she masters it!
[09:24] Akari
And then she'll become a USB insertion
pro with perfect accuracy!
[09:27] Hime
That's professional?! Really?!
[09:28] Akari
Yep.
[09:29] Akari
Then she start a company, and visit
other people with the same problem,
[09:34] Akari
and—bang, bang, bang—
jam those USB connections in!
[09:36] Akari
Mimi-chan will be creating
an all-new kind of business!
[09:39] Hime
That's awesome and sounds super cool!
[09:42] Akari
At the same time she can work
on training some new hires,
SIGN USB Incorporated
[09:44] ---
and found an entire workforce
of genius USB experts!
[09:46] Akari
The business will grow with leaps and bounds,
and she'll get super rich!
[09:49] Hime
That's awesome! Bubble-style!
[09:51] Akari
And then Mimi-chan becomes super rich
and retires to a tropical island. Aloha!
[09:54] Akari
And there she lived a life never having to
worry about USB ports ever again. The end!
[10:00] Hime
I love it! What a great story!
[10:02] Akari
Isn't it, though?
[10:04] Hime
Yeah!
[10:05] Akari
You commit to meeting the needs
of an unfulfilled market segment.
[10:07] Akari
That's the iron rule of business!
[10:09] Hime
USB Dream!
[10:11] Akari
Yay!
[10:13] Hime
Dream catching Yay!
Playing the lotto! Bang, bang, bang!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[10:24] Hinata
Where is that save point?!
[10:33] Hinata
If this keeps up...
[10:35] ---
I'll be in trouble.
[10:38] Hinata
The feeling of this bridge...
[10:39] Hinata
There's definitely a boss
battle on the other side!
[10:41] Hinata
Does that mean this is...
[10:43] ---
the last dungeon?!
[10:45] Hinata
Would it be a good idea to move onto
the boss battle without saving?
[10:49] Hinata
I'm not particularly good at the bullet
hell segments, so I tend to do poorly
[10:51] ---
on my first try with bosses.
[10:53] Hinata
You have to move your heart around...
[10:55] Hinata
Like this! And that! There!
[10:57] Hinata
I can do this!
[10:59] Hinata
I've got a slice of butterscotch-cinnamon pie,
along with other healing items...
[11:04] Hinata
I can do this!
[11:06] Hinata
Time to take this boss on!
[11:14] Hinata
I'm filled with determination
to fight this boss!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[11:21] Hinata
Virtual-san is looking.
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[11:31] Shiro
Oh, Pino-chan! Welcome!
[11:35] Pino
I am ever so fed up!
[11:38] Pino
Can I get some trivia about tai, please?
SIGN Tai (Red Sea Bream)
[11:46] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
[11:47] Shiro
Y'know, Japan is really the only
country to treat red sea bream as the
[11:51] ---
king of fish and a gourmet ingredient.
[11:56] Pino
I'm not quite full yet.
[11:59] ---
I could go for some more.
SIGN Trivia, go!
[12:06] Shiro
Well there's also Thai...
[12:07] Shiro
As in the country that is very popular
with Japanese tourists, Thailand.
SIGN Bangkok
[12:11] Shiro
And though it's the capitol of Thailand,
[12:13] ---
did you know that Bangkok
isn't its official name?
[12:16] Shiro
Officially it's...
[12:18] Shiro
Krungthepmahanakhon Amonrattanakosin
Mahintharayutthaya
[12:23] ---
Mahadilokphop Noppharatratchathaniburirom
Udomratchaniwetmahasathan
[12:28] ---
Amonphimanawatansathit
Sakkathattiyawitsanukamprasit!
SIGN Trivia Diner
[12:35] Pino
Wow, really?
[12:37] Pino
Your trivia really is always
so handy, Siro-oneechan!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Nike
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[12:47] Nike
Hiya! Nike here!
[12:50] Nike
Nice to meet you all.
[12:53] Nike
My favorite food is ramen combos.
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[13:03] Mito
Now, then, I caught him earlier,
and he should be waking up any time now.
SIGN Kenmochi Toya appeared!
[13:11] Toya
Class Prez! Why am I the
only one locked up here?!
[13:14] Toya
Everyone else said you just
asked them to appear normally!
[13:16] Toya
What did I do to earn this treatment?!
[13:18] Mito
Silence!
[13:19] Mito
You're joining me for the ultimate "Would
you rather" committee today, Kenmochi-san.
[13:22] Mito
Here's our subject!
[13:24] Mito
Which would you prefer?
[13:26] Mito
A) Being randomly shocked to the
point of mild pain once a day, or...
[13:29] Mito
B) To have your socks get
slightly soggy every day.
[13:31] Toya
Uh, I'd rather neither...
[13:32] Toya
I guess maybe B, having your
socks get soggy every day.
[13:37] Mito
That's what you'd prefer?
[13:38] Toya
I think so.
[13:39] Toya
I mean, if you get shocked once a day,
[13:41] ---
it'd be a real problem depending
on when it happens, right?
[13:43] Mito
What do you mean exactly?
[13:45] Toya
If you got shocked while using the bathroom,
you could end up splashing everywhere.
[13:49] Mito
I honestly would rather you
not have elaborated there.
[13:53] Mito
But I see what you mean.
[13:55] Mito
Like, say you're proposing.
[13:57] Mito
It could end up like, "I've always augh,"
which would definitely put a damper on things.
[14:00] Toya
Yes, exactly. That's what I'm thinking.
[14:02] Mito
That's a good point.
[14:03] Mito
But wouldn't it made your feet stink?
If your socks were a bit damp all the time.
[14:07] Toya
I guess they would.
[14:07] Mito
Right, and that would be terrible.
[14:08] Toya
But if it got to be bad, you could
always just take your socks off.
[14:13] Mito
Okay, then, Kenmochi-san,
take your socks off.
[14:16] Mito
Go ahead.
[14:17] Toya
Huh. Wha... My shoes... They won't come off.
[14:20] Mito
Isn't that the strangest thing?
[14:22] Mito
I can't imagine why!
[14:23] Mito
I wonder how much it would cost
to be able to take them off?
[14:25] Mito
Oh, look at the time! Okay, let's settle it.
[14:28] Mito
The answer is A). Receiving a random,
mildly painful shock once a day is preferable!
[14:35] Toya
I don't see the point of having
me on this segment!
[14:37] Mito
Silence!
[14:38] Mito
If you want to electrify
everyone else as a VTuber,
[14:40] ---
you had better be prepared
to be electrified yourself!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[14:47] Chaco
Good evening everybody!
SIGN Pen Name: Batsuko
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[14:50] Chaco
I'm Batsuko!
[14:52] Chaco
Here we go! Ready, and...
[14:54] Chaco
Batsuko pose!
[15:03] Rin
Virtual-san is looking.
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[15:07] Unity
Unity-chan...
[15:12] Unity
Oh, poor Cinderella.
[15:15] Unity
I will make it so you are
fit to go to the ball!
[15:19] Unity
There!
[15:21] Unity
Now, your beauty will be unleashed!
[15:25] Gori
Hello!
[15:28] Gori
Is this where we're filming today?
[15:30] Unity
Y-You wanna eat some curry croquettes?
[15:32] Gori
I appreciate it.
[15:34] Unity
He ate it.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[15:39] Tatsumi
This message goes out to the entire world.
SIGN Pen Name: Fukuhara Tatsumi
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[15:41] Tatsumi
My name is Fukuhara Tatsumi,
[15:43] Tatsumi
and I am a revolutionary
of the virtual world!
[15:45] ---
I am here to tell you all only one thing:
[15:47] ---
Put me in the anime!
[15:49] ---
That is all.
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer.
[15:59] Elu
Was someone else here?
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[16:04] Kerin
What happened to me?
[16:06] Kerin
It looks like I've turned into
drifting particles of light.
[16:10] Kerin
I can't maintain my form.
[16:12] Kerin
And after I was finally
about to meet Elu-san...
[16:15] Hime
Hey, Kerin! Where are you?
[16:18] Hina
Kerin!
[16:19] Elu
Hey, what is that white thing?
[16:22] Hime
Could it be?
[16:24] Kerin
She's calling for me...
[16:25] Kerin
Elu-san is calling me!
[16:29] Hime
Kerin's particles are shining!
[16:31] Hime
Elu-chan! Reach out and grab that light!
[16:33] Elu
Like this? Come on back!
[16:38] Kerin
I did it! I'm back!
[16:41] Kerin
Elu-san! Thank you so much!
[16:43] Kerin
Wait, where did Elu-san go?
[16:46] Elu
I-I'm over here.
[16:48] Hina
She's behind you, Kerin.
[16:49] Kerin
Unbelievable!
[16:50] Kerin
I finally regain physical form, but I
can't actually see Elu-san behind me?!
[16:54] Hime
Oh, it's because his layer is on top of hers!
[16:56] Kerin
I get it.
[16:57] Kerin
So it's actually "Kerin's Layer."
[16:59] Hina
This whole sketch has been a pun.
[17:01] Elu
Kerin-san, I'm Elu!
[17:04] Kerin
Elu-san! It's nice to meet you.
I'm Yamikumo Kerin, the dark elf!
[17:09] Kerin
Why?! Why can't I see Elu-san's face?!
[17:12] Hime
She's super cute!
[17:14] Hina
And super pretty!
[17:16] Kerin
Damn it! Quit hogging all the Elu-san!
[17:20] Elu
Kerin-san seems like a pleasant fellow!
[17:22] Kerin
This is such a perfect chance!
[17:24] Kerin
But I can't even see her!
[17:26] Kerin
If this forest can't help me...
It might as well burn!
[17:31] Hina
Don't tell me...
[17:32] Kerin
Ultimate Mega-Magic, Buchiflare!
[17:35] Kerin
I'm gonna blow it all up!
[17:36] Hina
Hime, you know what to do?
[17:38] Hime
Heck yeah!
[17:39] Himehina
In thy great name, we pledge
ourselves to darkness!
[17:44] Himehina
Let all the layers who stand
in our way be destroyed
[17:47] Himehina
by the power that we posses.
[17:48] Himehina
Kerin Slayer!
[17:52] Kerin
Huh? Huh? What the...?
[17:55] Kerin
Elu-san!
[17:56] Elu
That's me!
[17:58] Kerin
I'm moved!
[17:59] Kerin
It's Elu-san, in the flesh!
[18:01] Hime
Sorry to interrupt your moment, but can
you do something about the missiles?
[18:06] Kerin
That's right!
[18:07] Kerin
At this rate, Elu-san and the
forest will be destroyed!
[18:09] Hina
We're here too!
[18:11] Elu
My forest is going to burn again.
[18:13] Kerin
I won't let that happen!
[18:15] Kerin
Elu-san!
[18:16] Hime & Hina
Kerin!
[18:23] Hime
Elu-san... He sacrificed
himself to protect us!
[18:31] Hina
Elu-chan, putting that aside,
I'm feeling kind of thirsty.
[18:34] Hime
Oh, yeah, me too.
[18:35] Hime
You wanna go grab some banana shakes?
[18:38] Hime
We know a great place!
[18:40] Hina
Come on!
[18:40] Elu
Let's go!
[18:42] Hina
Y'know, bananas are vegetables!
[18:43] Kerin
Elu-san!
SIGN Kerin Slayer
SIGN To Be Continued
SIGN Sister!
[18:55] Uma
Sister, please, hear me out, Sister!
[18:58] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[18:59] Uma
The other day, I—
[18:59] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[19:05] Sister
What is it?
[19:06] Sora
I found a mini rice porridge at
the convenient store, so I bought it,
[19:10] ---
but when I tried to eat it at home,
it said it was for dogs.
[19:13] Sora
What a waste.
[19:15] Sister
Couldn't you have returned it?
[19:17] Sora
I already opened it before I noticed.
[19:19] Sister
I see.
[19:21] Sister
I suppose you'll have to eat it, then.
[19:23] Sora
Eat it?! But it's for dogs!
[19:25] Sister
Did you notice anything when you
looked at the back of the package?
[19:29] Sora
The back...? Wow,
it's really low in calories!
[19:33] Sister
Indeed.
[19:34] Sister
Maybe this is a stroke of fate,
[19:36] ---
and you could start a diet fad where
you eat rice porridge for dogs.
[19:39] Sora
But if it doesn't taste good...
[19:42] Sister
You could always write about
the experience in a book,
[19:44] ---
and if it's successful, then it will
be "delicious" in a different sense.
[19:48] Sora
I see!
[19:49] Sora
Then I'm gonna head to the convenience store
and buy a bunch of rice porridge for dogs!
[19:54] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[19:57] Uma
Virtual-kun wants to eat
porridge, too! Woof woof!
SIGN Sister!
[20:05] Sister
Virtual-san is looking.
[20:09] Mito
All right, we've got a letter here.
[20:11] Mito
It's from someone with the pen name "Upload."
[20:13] Everyone
Thanks for writing!
[20:16] Mito
"You all upload a lot of videos yourselves,
but do you watch anyone else's videos?"
[20:21] Mito
"If there are any that made an impression,
please tell us about them."
[20:24] Mito
Well, everyone, do you
watch anyone else's videos?
[20:28] Everyone
Yeah!
[20:29] Hime
I watch lots!
[20:30] Mito
I see, then Hime-san,
which videos do you watch?
[20:34] Hime
Let's see. I watch ones where people sing...
[20:37] Mito
Ah, I see.
[20:38] Hime
Also, let's see, I also like short
sketches that are kinda zippy,
[20:42] Hime
the kind where you can watch a whole
bunch and scratch the right kind of itch.
[20:47] Mito
That sounds nice. Faster-paced
videos are great for comedy.
[20:51] Hime
Exactly! You can watch a ton like that.
[20:53] Mito
I think that from this anime, the Game Club
and Kerin-san fit that kind of description.
[20:58] Akari
Kerin-kun!
[21:00] Akari
Yeah, they've got a style
that's hard to match!
[21:02] Mito
True enough.
[21:03] Hinata
It's really creative.
[21:05] Akari
But y'know, one day, I'd like
to blow my house up too.
[21:08] Hime
Is that your dream?
[21:09] Akari
It totally is!
[21:10] Shiro
I can do it for you, if you'd like.
[21:13] Akari
Really? How about the day after tomorrow?
[21:15] Hime
It's a date!
[21:17] Hina
I want to see that!
[21:20] Mito
Okay, well, we're out of time!
[21:23] Hime
That was fast!
[21:25] Hinata
I want more!
[21:25] Mito
That's it for this week, so until next week!
[21:29] Everyone
Virtual-san is looking!
[23:11] Yoko
Dunnananan! Yahoo, Akabane Yoko here!
SIGN Akabane Yoko
[23:14] Yoko
It's the time of year
for good hot pot dishes.
[23:16] Yoko
Motsunabe, Korean hot pot, tonyu nabe...
They're all good, but I recommend kaki nabe.
[23:21] Yoko
Getting under the kotatsu and eating some kaki
nabe is a great way to warm up, you know?
[23:25] Yoko
You can get stomachaches sometimes, though.
[23:27] Yoko
Just be sure not to put anything
weird in the pot, okay?
[23:30] Yoko
Next time is "White Tears."
SIGN Next Time
White Tears
[23:32] Yoko
Virtual-san will be looking next week, too!
E8 - White Tears
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] Peanut
They say Fukuzawa Yukichi was the first
guy to do college-style lectures in Japan.
[00:05] Uma
Okay, lecture me, Peanut-kun!
Three, two, one, go!
[00:08] Peanut
Like I'm gonna bother when you'll
just forget it, you horsey bastard!
[00:10] Uma
Hey, hey!
[00:13] Hina
Okay, are you ready?
[00:15] Hina
"Virtual-san is looking."
[00:18] Shiro
Looking...
[00:20] Shiro
Looking For Love, that musical!
Looking for Love...
[00:25] Hime
Oh, love...
[00:27] Hime
Love or Money!
[00:29] Hime
I think that's one!
[00:31] Hime
The movie Love or Money!
[00:33] Mito
Money... Money...
[00:35] Mito
Money Train? The movie.
[00:40] Akari
Train, huh? Movies that start with train...
[00:43] Akari
How to Train Your Dragon?
[00:45] Akari
Wait, no... Training Day! Yeah.
[00:51] Hinata
Day... Day... Day...
[00:55] Hinata
Day of the...?
[01:03] Hinata
Day of the Dead is a movie.
[01:06] Hinata
Deadpool!
[01:14] Mito
Ready, and..
[01:16] Everybody
Virtual-san is looking!
[03:04] Akari
Virtual-san is looking.
SIGN Mob A
[03:07] Mob A
The only possible reason I can think of...
SIGN Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 2
[03:09] Mob A
is them!
[03:15] Hime
Hey! Where are we?
[03:17] Hina
Everybody seems to have the same face...
[03:19] Mito
Are they actually even people?
[03:21] Hinata
Man, I am so tired.
[03:24] Mob B
That's...
SIGN Mob B
[03:25] Mob A
Mirai Akari, Tanaka Hime, Suzuki Hina...
SIGN Mob A
SIGN Mob B
[03:29] Mob B
Tsukino Mito, Nekomiya Hinata, and...
[03:33] Robo
Cyber Girl... Siro.
[03:37] Robo
What are they doing here?!
SIGN Mob A
[03:40] Mob A
I have no idea.
[03:41] Mob A
But ever since that TV show started airing,
they sometimes appear like this.
[03:46] Robo
That TV show...
[03:49] Robo
You people!
SIGN To Be Continued
[03:54] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
SIGN Utsureba kawaru, yo no narai.
SIGN Today's Phrase:
Utsureba kawaru,
yo no narai
SIGN Grandma
[04:01] Grandma
That's the phrase.
[04:04] Grandma
It refers to how the world
changes as time moves on.
SIGN Grandma
[04:09] Grandma
From the Showa to Heisei eras, one thing that
changed a lot is the electric appliance.
SIGN Grandma
[04:14] Grandma
We've moved from black and white
to color television,
[04:17] Grandma
air conditioning has made things
a lot more pleasant indoors,
[04:22] Grandma
and laundry machines have added
more and more features over time,
[04:25] ---
making that old chore so much simpler.
[04:28] Grandma
Now it's hard to imagine life
without something like a refrigerator.
SIGN Grandma
[04:32] Grandma
My family actually ran a butcher shop.
[04:36] Grandma
That meant having a fridge with a freezer,
which was revolutionary at the time.
[04:41] Grandma
See, having a freezer means you can
preserve meat for a lot longer,
[04:46] ---
which made for much better
turnaround for our product.
SIGN Grandma
[04:50] ---
That was quite remarkable, let me tell you.
SIGN Grandma
[04:54] Grandma
Incidentally, I think that being the child
of a butcher shop meant that I was the first
[04:59] ---
in my class to ever try sausage.
[05:03] Grandma
That's how long ago this was.
SIGN Grandma
[05:05] Grandma
That said, I'm fairly sure I'm the
first person in my class who has gone
[05:11] ---
on to become virtual, as well!
SIGN Grandma
[05:13] Grandma
Virtual Grandmother!
SIGN Grandma
[05:24] Peanut
The crunchiest virtual Youtuber, Peanut-kun!
[05:29] Peanut
Virtual-san is looking!
[05:37] Akari
I really thought we were toast!
[05:39] Akari
It's so good to be alive!
[05:42] Mito
That aside, space certainly
is mysterious, isn't it?
[05:44] Hime
Space?
[05:45] Mito
Yes.
[05:46] Mito
When you think about all the mysteries
humanity has yet to solve out there,
[05:49] ---
doesn't it just thrill you?
[05:50] Hinata
Oh, I get you!
[05:52] Hinata
Becoming a space pirate and going
on an adventure sounds good to me.
[05:55] Shiro
I want to boldly go where
no man has gone before!
[06:04] Hinata
That scared me... huh?!
[06:05] Hinata
Is it just me or did something happen outside?
[06:08] Shiro
Space?!
[06:10] Hinata
Look, everybody! Something's headed our way!
[06:14] Mito
Is it some kind of cosmic mystery?!
[06:15] Peanuts
Here I come!
[06:18] Everybody
You again?!
[06:20] Hime
Why are you coming straight at us?!
[06:23] Akari
Everybody! Let's come up with a plan, quick!
[06:25] Akari
Or he's going to get us again!
[06:30] Hinata
That laugh...
[06:31] Hinata
It's Meteoric Peanut-kun!
[06:32] Shiro
In that case, why don't
we try flattering him?
[06:35] Shiro
Peanut is always a pushover!
[06:37] Akari
Makes sense, so we just
have to complement him!
[06:39] Shiro
Take it away, then, Akari-chan!
[06:40] Akari
Seriously?!
[06:41] Akari
Uh, you're handsome, in a
lower mid-tier kind of way!
[06:44] Hime
And uh, I really want to wear
those cool underwear you have!
[06:46] Hina
Your hair's so stylish, too!
[06:47] Hinata
And you're so yellow! Yellow is good!
[06:49] Mito
Really, it's just so impressive how the,
uh, the color of your nipples is so vivid.
[06:54] Shiro
Hey, he's not stopping at all!
[06:55] Shiro
You want me to rip your damn
briefs off, you cocky nut?!
[06:59] Mito
N-Now I have to block up before
we get booted off the air!
[07:01] Siro
Tee-hee, that just slipped out!
[07:03] Hinata
We're done for!
[07:07] Peanut
Here I come!
[07:11] Gori
Hello.
[07:13] Everybody
Hello!
SIGN To Be Continued
[07:17] Hinata
Virtual-san is looking!
[07:24] Aoi
Gori-chan...
[07:25] Gori
Hello.
[07:26] Aoi
How you been?
[07:27] Gori
Having fun, I'd say.
[07:28] Aoi
And that's the problem!
[07:29] Gori
What brought this on?
[07:30] Aoi
There's nothing fun about the fact that
Fuji Aoi Park might end up closing!
[07:34] Gori
This park is actually a business?
[07:36] Aoi
That's right! How did you not notice?!
[07:38] Gori
I-I'm sorry.
[07:40] Aoi
That being the case, Gori-chan,
can I lay you off?
[07:42] Gori
I had a job here?!
[07:45] Aoi
I happened to get my hands on a
younger, cuter, sexier employee.
[07:50] Gori
You already hired my replacement?!
[07:52] Pink
Hello there, I'm a pink gorilla.
[07:54] Gori
My own sister?!
[07:55] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[07:57] Gori
Hello!
[08:00] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble, Akari-chan!
[08:05] Hime
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[08:13] Akari
What's wrong, Hime?
[08:15] Hime
Akari-chan! We've got really big trouble!
[08:17] Akari
And what is it this time?
[08:19] Hime
Someone with the pen name
"Takahashi-kun" is in trouble!
[08:22] Hime
Here, ready this and help them!
[08:24] Hime
Go!
[08:25] Akari
"Hello, Akari-san."
[08:27] Hime
H'lo.
[08:27] Akari
Hello.
[08:28] Akari
"My boss at work always hits the enter
key as loudly as he possibly can."
SIGN Clack!
[08:33] Akari
"It's so distracting,
I can't focus on my work!"
SIGN Clack!
[08:35] Akari
"What should I do?"
SIGN Clack!
[08:37] Akari
I see, I see.
SIGN Problem: Boss hits enter really noisily
[08:37] Hime
It's textual harassment, huh?
[08:40] Hime
That's what it is.
[08:41] Akari
I know what they mean, though.
[08:42] Akari
Sometimes you get distracted when
you hear that really loud "clack"!
[08:44] Hime
It's always louder than you think, too.
[08:45] Akari
Yep. But y'know, it feels good to do.
[08:48] Hime
I don't know why, but it's
really exhilarating.
[08:49] Mirai
Crazily so!
[08:51] Hime
Clack! Finished!
[08:53] Akari
It really does gives you a
sense of finishing something.
[08:56] Akari
Maybe because it's so big?
The actual key on the keyboard, I mean.
[08:58] Hime
The enter key.
[08:59] Akari
Yeah, the enter key.
[09:00] Akari
But I can understand how
Takahashi-kun would, y'know?
[09:03] Akari
Want to ask his boss to stop
smashing that enter key,
[09:06] Akari
but considering it's his boss,
it's hard to bring up.
[09:09] Hime
Yep, yep, yep.
[09:10] Akari
What to do?
[09:12] Hime
Hey, Mirai-san?
[09:15] ---
Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[09:17] Hikari
Everyone has their odd habits,
so I think you should just try to bear it.
[09:22] Yami
That's messed up!
[09:23] Yami
The other guy's at fault.
Might as well come out and say it!
[09:26] Hikari
But it's his boss.
[09:29] Hikari
It could have a bad affect
on their relationship.
[09:32] Yami
God, you're so old fashioned.
[09:34] Yami
Coddling the entrenched powers
that be like that is exactly what
[09:36] ---
breeds so much harassment.
[09:39] Hikari
I guess you have a point, but...
[09:42] Yami
I figure push comes to shove, you rip
the enter key off their keyboard.
[09:47] Hikari
Wouldn't that be a kind of harassment, too?
[09:51] Hikari
Akari, you make the final call!
[09:54] Hime
Hello? Earth to Mirai-san!
[09:59] Akari
Sorry!
[10:00] Akari
I'm finally back.
[10:02] Hime
Welcome home.
[10:03] Akari
Right!
[10:05] Akari
Now, pen name Takahashi-kun!
I'm gonna get to the bottom line!
[10:09] Hime
Is she going to get to it?
[10:11] Hime
Her bottom... line?
[10:13] Akari
You need to encourage your boss!
[10:16] Hime
Encourage them?
[10:17] Hime
Then is he giving up on this enter key stuff?
[10:19] Akari
Not exactly!
SIGN Clack!
[10:21] Akari
First, you listen out for the
moment they smash that enter key.
[10:25] Akari
Then, right when they do it, you shout out!
[10:29] Akari
"Nice enter!"
SIGN Nice enter!!
[10:30] Hime
I like it!
[10:32] Akari
The important thing is being consistent!
[10:33] Akari
Never miss any time that
they smash that enter key,
[10:37] Akari
and the second you do it's,
"Nice enter! The best in Japan!"
[10:41] Akari
"That's why they call you 'Mr. Enter'!'"
[10:43] Hime
That sounds like fun!
[10:45] Akari
By doing that, since it's just encouragement,
it won't be taken the wrong way.
[10:49] Akari
But wouldn't the boss get embarrassed by all
that fuss just from hitting the enter key?
[10:53] Hime
You've got a point!
[10:54] Akari
Right?!
[10:55] Hime
It'd be obvious!
[10:55] Akari
It would!
[10:56] Hime
It'd be obvious!
[10:57] Akari
Totally obvious!
[10:58] Akari
So, in order to make sure Takahashi-kun
doesn't cheer him on,
[11:01] Akari
his boss will start to
press the enter key gently!
[11:04] Hime
That's super awesome! You are so smart!
[11:07] Akari
That's what it takes to make it in society!
[11:11] Hime
Super Miracle Enter Key Man!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[11:21] Hinata
Time to build, time to build!
[11:29] Hinata
What should I do?
[11:31] Hinata
If I use blocks to create a
new park in this vacant lot,
[11:36] Hinata
how exactly should I do it?
[11:39] Hinata
Like this!
[11:45] Hinata
Why, would you look at that?
[11:47] Hinata
Those scattered piles of sand are now laid
out as lovely as a rock garden in Kyoto!
[11:54] Hinata
The big pipes that conveyed nothing
[11:57] ---
but Gianism are now laid out like
the stage for a glamorous idol.
[12:00] Hinata
And the lumpy, dangerous ground is now flat.
[12:04] Hinata
A skillful hand has transformed his typical
empty lot into a soothing park space.
[12:18] Hinata
I hope people call me skillful some day!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[12:25] Mito
Rise! Attention! Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[12:33] Shiro
Oh, it's Tokino Sora-chan! Welcome!
[12:37] Kaede
Gosh, I am so fed up!
[12:40] Miria
Can I get some trivia about sushi, please?
[12:43] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
SIGN Trivia, go!
[12:50] Shiro
Now, sushi...
SIGN Sushi
SIGN Sushi has a long history, and has been known to exist since the Nara period.
SIGN The hand-formed style became popular in the Edo period,
[13:02] ---
when it was called Edomae sushi,
and sold in carts all over old Tokyo.
SIGN When you think about how people from the time would casually stop by a cart
SIGN to stand around eating sushi, you could even call it Edo period fast food!
SIGN At the time, sushi tended to be as big as rice balls,
SIGN Edo Period
SIGN Modern Day
[13:16] ---
and since that made it hard
to eat with chopsticks,
SIGN it was instead eaten by hand, which is a custom that continues to this day.
SIGN Also, in sushi jargon, wasabi is called "namida" because if it's spicy enough,
[13:26] ---
it can bring you to tears (namida).
[13:31] Miria
Wow, I had no idea!
[13:33] Miria
Your trivia really is always
so handy, Siro-chan!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Shirogumi-san
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[13:43] Shirogumi
The time has come!
[13:45] Shirogumi
My name is "Watanabe Suzume."
[13:48] Shirogumi
Also known as Grisaille IV.
[13:51] Shirogumi
Let the depths of my sorcery
teach you true fear.
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[13:59] Mito
I wonder if Kaede-chan has
been watching Kerin Slayer.
[14:05] Kaede
Burn down the dark elf's forest!
[14:08] Mito
You are so impressionable.
[14:10] Kaede
You think elves and dark elves
live in different forests?
[14:13] Mito
Elves aren't human anyway,
so who cares where they live?
[14:16] Kaede
You got a point there!
[14:17] Mito
Anyway, Kaede-chan, let's get on with the
ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
[14:20] Kaede
Right!
[14:20] Mito
Here is our subject for today!
[14:23] Mito
Which would you rather be?
[14:24] Mito
A) Immortal, but having
to take exams every year.
[14:28] Mito
B) Have five years to live, but be rich
enough that you can do whatever you want.
[14:31] Kaede
Oh, B for me, easy.
[14:33] Mito
Really?
[14:34] Kaede
Well if you know exactly what kind of time
you've got, you can spend all of it having fun.
[14:38] Mito
You'd die in five years!
Is that what you want?
[14:40] Kaede
Sure.
[14:40] Mito
Come on, quit sounding so suicidal!
[14:42] Mito
Don't give up! Live your life!
[14:45] Kaede
What about you, Mito-chan?
[14:45] Mito
I think I would live my immortal life,
even if every year was exams.
[14:49] Kaede
Why?!
[14:50] Mito
Well, all you really need to
do is fail every year, right?
[14:52] Mito
You could repeat the same
grade, like, 1,030 times.
[14:54] Mito
Wouldn't that be fine?
[14:56] Higuchi
That could be a Guinness World Record!
[14:57] Mito
That sounds good to me.
[14:59] Kaede
But you gotta keep living no matter
how badly hurt or sad you get, then.
[15:03] Mito
Kaede-chan, is life really just
injuries and sadness for you?
[15:07] Kaede
Well, I mean, isn't life mostly
just depressing stuff?
[15:11] Mito
To what degree?
[15:13] Kaede
Eighty percent...
[15:13] Mito
Eighty percent?! It's that bad?!
[15:15] Kaede
Well, I guess, to have a fun life,
[15:17] Kaede
you've gotta work hard from every day, right?
[15:19] Mito
Okay, stop trying to sound profound!
[15:22] Mito
This whole bit has me trying
to do that as the final line!
[15:24] Kaede
My bad!
[15:26] Mito
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
[15:27] Kaede
Right.
[15:27] Mito
So here's the answer...
[15:29] Mito
A) Being immortal and every
year being an exam year!
[15:34] Kaede
That don't seem like it'd suck to you?
[15:35] Mito
Can you imagine the kind of subscriber
counts you'd rack up if you were immortal?!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[15:43] Kaede
Virtual-san is looking!
[15:44] Kaede
Kaederon!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[15:48] Unity
Unity-chan...
[15:51] Unity
Hey! Today I'm here to solve your problems,
and I'm on a roll!
[15:54] Unity
Let's take a call right now. Hello?
[15:58] Caller
Hello.
[15:59] Unity
What can I help you with today?
[16:01] Caller
Well, I'm kind of nervous about something.
[16:04] Unity
Mmhm!
[16:04] Caller
I keep getting this feeling
something is in my room.
[16:07] Caller
Like someone is watching me all the time.
[16:12] Unity
And have you talked to the police?
[16:13] Caller
Well... that seems a bit extreme.
[16:15] Narrator
Did you notice that?
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Hoshikawa Sora
[16:19] Chaco
People of Earth, nice to meet you!
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[16:23] Chaco
I am the virtual alien idol, Hoshikawa Sora!
[16:27] Chaco
Virtual-san is looking again, today!
[16:31] Chaco
See you around!
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer.
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[16:46] Hina
Hime, why are we up in the mountains?
[16:49] ---
It's so cold!
[16:51] Hime
I heard a rumor that Kerin
was recuperating up here!
[16:55] Hina
He's still alive?!
[16:57] Hime
Well, I feel kinda bad about what happened,
[17:00] Hime
so I figured I'd bring this to make amends.
[17:02] Hina
Hey, it's a picture of Elu-san!
[17:07] Hime
I figure if we find him, I can hand it over.
[17:10] Hina
You're such a sweetheart, Hime-san!
[17:12] Kerin
What's all the noise?
[17:15] Kerin
You two again?!
[17:17] Hina
Oh, there he is.
[17:18] Hina
Hi there, remember us?
[17:20] Hina
It's Hime and Hina, the Kerin Slayers.
[17:23] Kerin
I remember every last detail!
[17:25] Kerin
You two got in the way
of Elu-san and my love!
[17:30] Hime & Hina
Love?
[17:31] Kerin
Suck on this, you two!
[17:32] Hime
Wait, wait, wait! Just hear me out!
[17:35] Kerin
I don't want to hear your excuses!
[17:36] Hina
Th-This is bad! If those detonate,
it'll cause an avalanche,
[17:39] Hina
and then the bears will be in trouble!
[17:42] ---
Take this! Ancient Magic: Missile De'Fleckt!
[17:46] Kerin
What?! My missile...
[17:54] Hime
Hey, something got hit.
[17:56] ---
Was it some birdies?
[17:57] Hime
Sorry!
[17:59] Hina
The birdies!
[18:01] Kerin
How dare you deflect my missile!
[18:03] Kerin
Keblins!
[18:06] Hime
So many Keblins!
[18:12] Hime
Wait, wait! One of you just
said kebab! I'm positive.
[18:15] Hina
Wow, I could go for kebabs.
[18:17] Hime
Same.
[18:17] Hina
But, wow, this is bad!
[18:19] Kerin
Farewell, little girls!
[18:21] Kerin
Now, swarm them!
[18:23] Hime & Hina
No!
[18:26] Game Club
Hold it right there!
[18:27] Everyone
Who's that?!
SIGN Sister!
[18:38] Uma
Can I ask you about something, Sister?
[18:41] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[18:42] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[18:43] Uma
Well, I—
[18:50] Sister
What is it?
[18:51] Sora
I hate doing my makeup when I have days off!
Not to mention, I'm not a morning person,
[18:54] Sora
so sometimes I go out without any.
[18:56] Sora
I'd be embarrassed to run
into someone I know,
[18:59] Sora
but to be honest, it feels like
more trouble than it's worth.
[19:01] Sister
I can understand why you'd feel that way.
[19:03] Sister
It might be a better idea
to take the time to do it.
[19:07] Sora
I know, right?
[19:08] Sora
What do you think might help?
[19:10] Sister
Perhaps you could put on one of
the masks that wrestlers wear.
[19:14] Sora
Like a masked wrestler?!
[19:16] Sister
If you go out looking like a masked
wrestler in their private life,
[19:18] ---
I'm sure your friends won't recognize you.
[19:21] Sora
I get the feeling people
might ask me what I do for a living.
[19:24] Sister
In that case, maybe you could
wear one of those horse masks.
[19:27] Sister
That certainly isn't an
odd sight in this town.
[19:32] Sora
Oh, yeah! I think I saw one
of those just the other day!
[19:35] Sora
I'll try it!
[19:38] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[19:40] Uma
Be careful about getting enough air
when summer rolls around, though!
SIGN Sister!
[19:48] Uma
Virtual-san is looking!
[19:50] Uma
Neiiiigh!
[19:53] Akari
Okay, we've got a letter here.
[19:56] Akari
It's from someone with the
pen name "Eternal Blizzard."
[19:59] Everybody
Thanks for writing!
[20:02] Akari
"Don't you think that
titles are really cool?"
[20:05] Akari
"I really do!"
[20:06] Akari
"If you all could add titles to your names,
what would they be like? Please tell me!"
SIGN Coming up with titles!
[20:13] Everybody
Titles, huh...
[20:14] Shiro
I think Akari-chan's should include
her favorite article of clothing...
[20:17] Shiro
The one down there.
[20:20] Akari
You mean the v-shaped thing?
[20:21] Hime
V-shaped!
[20:23] Akari
I actually have one I came up with, though!
[20:25] Hime
No way!
[20:27] Akari
My title would be...
[20:31] Akari
"The Walking Free Directory!"
[20:32] Mito
Oh, wow!
SIGN They discussed it for about 20 minutes,
so let's cut straight to the titles!
[20:38] Akari
Then I'll just be The Walking PK.
SIGN Walking PK
(Panty-Krammed)
[20:40] Hime
I like that!
[20:41] Mito
PK!
[20:42] Shiro
The Bloody Beautiful White...
SIGN The Bloody Beautiful White Dolphinch
[20:44] Hina
Dolphinch!
[20:45] Mito
Dolphinch?
[20:47] Shiro
Emergency Chuckle 119.
SIGN Emergency Chuckle 119
[20:48] Hime
Oh, like the phone number!
[20:51] Hime
The Navely Venus Otaku Freak.
SIGN The Navely Venus Otaku Freak
[20:52] Mito
Navely Venus Otaku Freak?
[20:55] Shiro
The Weed-Eating Human
Centipede High Schooler.
SIGN The Weed-Eating
Human Centipede High Schooler
[20:59] Hime
The Fluffy Pink Renegade.
SIGN The Fluffy Pink Renegade
[21:00] Mito
The Fluffy Pink Renegade!
That's got a nice rhythm to it!
[21:03] Akari
Let's wrap it up by sounding off!
[21:05] Akari
This has been brought to you
by the Walking PK, Mirai Akari!
[21:09] Shiro
The Bloody Beautiful White Dolphinch,
Cyber Girl Siro!
[21:13] Hime
The Emergency Chuckle 119, Tanaka Hime!
[21:15] Hina
The Navely Venus Otaku Freak, Suzuki Hina!
[21:18] Mito
The Weed-Eating Human Centipede
High Schooler, Tsukino Mito!
[21:21] Hinata
And the Fluffy Pink Renegade,
Nekomiya Hinata!
[21:25] Akari
That does it for this time!
So until next week,
[21:29] All
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Tsukiyo Sora
[23:09] Tsukiyo & Sora
Hello there everyone, I'm Tsukiyo Sora.
[23:11] Tsukiyo & Sora
Muscle strain is the flavor of youth,
[23:13] Tsukiyo & Sora
menthol is the smell of first love,
[23:14] Tsukiyo & Sora
and my legs carried me to a warm café
where I made some harsh-tasting memories,
[23:18] Tsukiyo & Sora
but in the evening they all became
bittersweet memorial events.
[23:21] Tsukiyo & Sora
As things are, this virtual space
might be the embodiment of my
[23:24] ---
youthful days that will
never fade, even as I age.
[23:27] Tsukiyo & Sora
You're not sure what I mean?
[23:29] ---
I'm not too sure myself.
[23:30] ---
But there's one thing I know that
I'm supposed to say, so here goes.
[23:33] ---
Next time is "Transmigration
of an Old Lady's Soul."
SIGN Next Time
"Transmigration of an Old Lady's Soul"
[23:36] ---
Virtual-san will be looking again next week.
E9 - Transmigration of an Old Lady's Soul
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] Unity
There!
[00:00] Unity
There!
[00:02] Peanuts
They say the one yen coin costs
more than one yen to make, y'know.
[00:05] Uma
Hey, hey, hey! So how much
does it cost to make Peanut?
[00:07] Peanuts
Are you asking about my body?
[00:08] ---
That's getting way too personal,
you horsey bastard!
[00:10] Uma
Hey hey!
[00:14] Shiro
Hey everybody! Let's play the V.V. game!
SIGN Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
[00:17] Hime
Yeah, the V.V. game!
[00:19] Everybody
Yeah! V.V.! V.V.! Yay!
[00:24] Shiro
All right, here we go!
[00:26] Shiro
Ready and... Virtual-san!
[00:29] Everyone
V.V.!
[00:30] Hinata
Crowd of one!
[00:31] Everyone
V.V.!
[00:33] Hinata
Virtual-san!
[00:34] Everyone
V.V.!
[00:35] Hime
Crowd of two!
[00:36] Everyone
Everyone: V.V.!
[00:37] Hime
Virtual-san, the horse!
[00:38] Everyone
V.V.!
[00:40] Akari
Team of three!
[00:41] Everyone
V.V.!
[00:42] Hina
Huh, wait a second, just wait a second.
[00:44] Hina
Why does Virtual-san make it a team?
[00:47] Mito
True, he is shaped like a human.
[00:49] Akari
Come on, he's a horse!
[00:51] Shiro
Good point. I'm not sure which it is.
[00:53] Shiro
Let me call him real quick.
[00:58] Shiro
Answer the phone, horse. Come on already.
[01:01] Akari
I bet he counts as a horse!
[01:03] Shiro
Oh, hey, horse?
[01:05] Uma
Hey, hey!
[01:06] Shiro
Do we count you as a person, or a horse?
[01:10] Uma
I'm a horse-faced human, so I
count as human! Hey, hey, hey—
[01:15] Shiro
Apparently, he's human.
[01:16] Akari
Damn it! That horsey bastard!
[01:20] Mito
Well, since Akari-san got it wrong,
[01:21] ---
she has to pretend to be Virtual-san
when we do the title call this week.
[01:25] Akari
Do I have to?
[01:27] Shiro
In that case, let's get to it! Ready, and...
[01:31] Everyone
Virtual-san is looking!
[01:33] Akari
Hey, hey!
[03:20] Miria
Virtual-san is looking!
[03:21] Miria
Yay!
SIGN Mob C
SIGN Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 3
[03:24] Mob C
Where did you come from?
[03:26] Hime
Where did we come from?
[03:28] Hina
Hmm, not sure!
[03:30] Mito
More importantly, is there something
we can help you all with?
[03:33] Mob C
Of course there is! We're here
to remove you by force!
SIGN Mob C
[03:37] Shiro
By force?
[03:39] Hinata
Remove?
[03:40] Akari
Oh, gosh. Here, where everyone can see?
[03:43] Mito
I think you might be
imagining the wrong thing.
[03:46] Mob C
Listen up! When I heard that you six Vtubers
were going to have a crossover on TV,
[03:51] ---
I was really hyped about it!
SIGN Mob D
[03:55] Mob C
But then we saw something that
totally defied our expectations!
[03:57] Mob E
It was like something from another dimension!
SIGN Mob E
[04:01] Hime
Yeah, I get that.
[04:02] Hina
Not sure what you expect
us to do about it, though.
[04:05] Mob C
And now, you're here!
SIGN Mob C
[04:08] Mob Group
That can't be allowed!
[04:11] Mito
Hey, wait—!
[04:11] Akari
No!
SIGN Mob A
[04:15] Mob A
Hey! What are you doing?!
[04:17] Robo
I don't know, but I can't let this happen!
[04:23] Robo
Did I just jump?
SIGN To Be Continued
SIGN Virtual Kerin Slayer Wars.
[04:38] Hime
That was a close one!
[04:40] Hime
The Keblins all got smashed!
[04:42] Hina
But by who?! And why?
[04:44] Kerin
You people!
[04:45] Kerin
You would dare harm my darling Keblins?
Identify yourselves!
[04:49] Kaede
We are the Game Club!
[04:50] Kaede
An empire that has destroyed countless virtual
countries in pursuit of a unified galaxy!
[04:54] Haruto
That's the idea, but...
[04:56] Haruto
Chief, we can't move!
[04:58] Ryo
They're so heavy, and they won't come off.
[05:00] Ryo
Must be all the gravity.
[05:03] Miria
I'm stuck!
[05:06] Kerin
You think this is a joke!?
[05:07] Hina
Hey, why did you all crash
here in those things?
[05:12] Kaede
Well, we were on our ship having a
meeting about conquering the universe,
[05:17] Kaede
but then a missile hit us out of nowhere.
[05:19] Miria
That's right. It hit us out of the blue,
and we had to put on these suits to escape.
[05:24] Hime
Kerin-kun...
[05:25] Ryo
And then we got pulled in
by this planet's gravity.
[05:29] Haruto
And there you have it!
[05:30] Haruto
I'm just glad that no one seems to be hurt.
[05:33] Hina
Huh, he seems pretty nice.
[05:35] Hime
Hey, Kerin! That was your missile, dude!
[05:38] Kerin
Uh... well... I don't know what to say.
[05:41] Miria
You're the one who shot that missile at us?!
[05:43] Haruto
You have some nerve,
picking a fight with our Game Club!
[05:46] Ryo
You hit us, we hit back... and then some!
[05:49] Haruto
Exactly!
[05:50] Haruto
We will pool our powers to strike you down!
[05:53] Haruto
Won't we?!
[05:56] Hime
One of them has a real obnoxious laugh.
[05:58] Hina
So do you, though.
[05:59] Haruto
You there, what's with that pink hair?!
[06:01] Haruto
It's like... a pink fool!
[06:04] Miria
Shut up Harutrash! That girl's cute!
[06:07] Miria
I get the feeling we'd get along!
[06:08] Miria
Hi there! I'm Miria.
[06:10] Hime
Miria-chan! Nice to meet you,
I'm Chuckling Pink, Hime!
[06:13] Kaede
Everyone, listen!
[06:14] Kaede
Our main problem right now is
finding a way out of these suits!
[06:17] Ryo
Good point...
[06:18] Kaede
You're Kerin-kun, right?
[06:20] Kerin
Yes, Yamikumo Kerin.
[06:22] Kaede
Help us figure a way out!
[06:24] Kerin
Certainly!
[06:24] Hime
Last time, didn't we have to spam
a bunch of lightning to fix it?
[06:29] Hime
So what now?
[06:31] Hina
Should I call the thunder?
[06:32] Kerin
You shouldn't!
[06:33] Kaede
Well, we can move a little bit.
Maybe we should run into each other?
[06:37] Ryo
Good idea, chief!
[06:38] Ryo
Since they have the same mass, maybe a
collision will cause them to be obliterated!
[06:42] Miria
Okay, Harutrash, let's try it out!
[06:44] Haruto
Wait, you pink fool!
[06:45] Haruto
We should run some more numbers first—
[06:48] Miria
Ow! That didn't work.
[06:51] Kaede
All it did was hurt you.
[06:53] Hina
I think I see a crack, though?
[06:56] Hime
I know! I've got just the thing!
[06:58] Hime
I call it, "Bowling with the Game Club!"
[07:02] Miria
Bowling?
[07:03] Hime
First, we line Miria-chan and
the others up like this.
[07:06] Ryo
What's the idea here?
[07:07] Kaede
Let's follow Hime-chan's
instructions for now.
[07:10] Hime
All right, everything's set!
[07:12] Hime
Kerin, send that other one
this way! Just roll him over!
[07:15] Kerin
Got it!
[07:16] Haruto
What?! Human bowling?!
[07:19] Haruto
Chuckling Pink, what kind
of plan is this?!
[07:22] Kerin
Gonna smash em all!
[07:26] Hime
Yay! Strike!
[07:28] Hina
They got out, but it definitely wasn't easy.
[07:31] Kaede
Ow, ow, ow... Is everyone okay?
[07:34] Miria
I might be in shock.
[07:35] Ryo
I think I'm fine.
[07:36] Haruto
You'll pay for this, Chuckling Pink!
[07:39] Hime
You got some kind of beef with me,
Harutrash?! You wanna become space debris?
[07:42] Hina
Yeah, Harutrash!
You wanna go in the shredder?
[07:45] Haruto
You people...
[07:47] Haruto
Very well, then! I'm gonna blow you all up!
[08:06] Kerin
Um... Are we going to
continue Kerin Slayer?
[08:10] Kaede
The Game Club's galactic conquest continues!
SIGN Kerin Slayer
[08:18] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
[08:21] Grandma
Banbutsu ruten.
SIGN Today's Phrase:
Banbutsu ruten
[08:24] Banner
That's the phrase.
[08:27] G
It refers to how everything in
the world is always changing.
[08:31] G
Think about how much, and in how many
different ways, music has changed.
[08:37] G
Nowadays you can watch music videos
legally for free online, right?
[08:42] G
But in the old days, you were limited
to records, radio, and TV for music.
[08:48] G
Even in the case of records,
it's not like everyone owned a player.
[08:53] G
I imagine the majority were getting
their music from radio and TV.
[08:58] G
I was no exception, of course.
[08:59] G
Back then, I had this impulse
to want to learn a lot of songs,
[09:02] G
so I would be listening to the radio,
focusing on the lyrics and writing them down.
[09:08] G
Usually three or four times was enough was
enough for me to have the entire song down,
[09:12] G
and by then I'd usually have
the melody memorized, too.
[09:16] G
Now that I think about it,
the way you can just look up
[09:18] ---
lyrics online is one of the things
that's remarkable about our modern age.
[09:23] G
It goes to show that things
are always changing.
[09:26] G
All things continue to turn,
and turn, and turn!
[09:31] G
Round and around and around!
[09:34] G
Round and around it goes!
[09:36] G
Around it goes!
[09:51] G
Grandma is looking.
[09:55] Hime & Hina
Virtual-san is looking!
[10:03] Aoi
How do you think we can get more visitors?
[10:06] Gori
That's a good question.
[10:08] Aoi
Do you have any friends
we could ask to come over?
[10:11] Gori
Friends of mine?
[10:12] Aoi
Yeah, the kind that might attract a crowd!
[10:14] ---
That could net us some visitors!
[10:15] Aoi
Like Nekomiya Hinata-chan!
[10:18] Gori
I think she's probably too
busy with video games.
[10:20] Aoi
What about Tsukino Mito-chan?
[10:23] Gori
I get the feeling she'd eat all our grass,
so that's probably a bad idea.
[10:28] Aoi
Come on, there has to be somebody!
[10:30] Gori
I know just the person!
[10:31] Aoi
Who is it?!
[10:32] Gori
Virtual-san.
[10:34] Aoi
You really think that's a good idea?
[10:36] Gori
Now that you mention it... sure enough.
[10:38] Uma
Aoi-chan! I'm here already!
[10:41] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[10:43] Gori
Hello!
[10:46] Hime
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble Akari-chan!
[10:51] Hime
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[11:03] Hime
That's Mirai Akari's Morse code!
[11:05] Hime
Akari-chan, there's really big trouble!
[11:09] Akari
Wait, what?
[11:11] Hime
So you can talk!
[11:13] Hime
Well, pen name "Tom-kun" is in trouble!
[11:15] Hime
So seriously, ready this already,
please! Beep, beep, beep...
[11:17] Akari
Sure, okay, beep beep beep.
[11:19] Akari
"Hello, Akari-san."
[11:20] Hime
H'lo!
[11:20] Akari
Hello there.
[11:22] Akari
"I love watching stuff on YouTube!"
[11:24] Hime
Oh, nice!
[11:25] Akari
"But lately I've had the problem where
once I start watching it, I can't stop."
[11:29] Akari
"I start watching it when I go to bed,
and before I notice it, it's already morning."
[11:33] Akari
"When I spend that much time watching videos,
[11:34] ---
it makes me wonder if I could be
using that time more effectively?"
[11:37] Akari
And then I start to feel guilty."
[11:39] Hime
I get that! I totally get that!
SIGN Problem: Unable to stop watching YouTube
[11:41] Akari
If you have Autoplay on, you tend
to end up watching what's up next!
[11:45] Hime
Yeah, yeah!
[11:46] Akari
Well, let's see, then. It's great
to enjoy watching YouTube,
[11:50] Akari
but Tom-kun feels bad about
staying up all night to watch it?
[11:53] Hime
Yeah.
[11:54] Akari
I wonder if there's a good solution?
[11:59] Hime
Hey, Mirai-san?
[12:02] ---
Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[12:04] Hikari
This is simple!
[12:05] Hikari
You just need to limit how much time
you spend watching videos each day.
[12:09] Hikari
All it takes is a little discipline!
[12:11] Yami
How is that any fun?
[12:14] Yami
You need to be more true to your desires!
[12:17] Yami
Even if you can't focus on work or other
hobbies because of the lack of sleep,
[12:19] Yami
as long as you enjoy watching
videos all night, that's fine!
[12:22] Hikari
That's way too indulgent.
[12:24] Hikari
Everything is best in moderation.
[12:26] Yami
Who gives a crap?
[12:28] Yami
You only live once.
[12:29] ---
So all that matters is enjoying it.
[12:31] Yami
Watch all the vids you want!
[12:33] Hikari
Oh, this is no good...
[12:35] Hikari
Akari, take it from here.
[12:38] Hime
Hello! Earth to Mirai-san?
[12:43] Akari
Sorry, I was deep in thought!
[12:44] Hime
I appreciate the effort!
[12:45] Akari
Thank you so much!
[12:48] Akari
Pen name Tom-kun!
[12:50] ---
Here's the bottom line!
[12:52] Hime
Is she gonna get to it?! Her bottom... line?!
[12:55] Akari
You need a night job!
[12:59] Hime
A night job?!
[12:59] Akari
Yep! He wants to use his all-night
YouTube time more productively, right?
[13:04] Akari
In that case, he should get a night
job in addition to his day job!
[13:09] Hime
I see!
[13:11] Akari
That way, all that time he's spent watching
videos will all be turned into cash!
[13:17] Hime
Amazing! One simple trick!
[13:19] Akari
Plus!
[13:21] Akari
If you end up working that much, it limits
how much free time you have, right?
[13:25] Hime
True enough.
[13:26] Akari
That way, you can use your limited time
[13:27] ---
to make sure you only watch the videos
you're genuinely interested in!
[13:32] Akari
Like mine, for instance!
[13:34] Hime
She even threw in some self-promotion!
She's a natural!
[13:36] Akari
So, go and get a night job!
[13:40] Hime
But what if they're still a student,
and don't have a job yet?
[13:48] Akari
In that case, start going to night classes!
[13:50] Hime
I forgot about that option!
[13:51] Akari
Yeah! To make sure you don't
watch too much YouTube,
[13:55] ---
forget about sleeping, get a job
at night, or go to class at night!
[13:57] Akari
You've gotta use your
limited time effectively!
[13:58] Akari
That's the best life hack possible!
[14:00] Hime
Amazing! That's Akari-senpai
for you! So conscientious!
[14:05] Hime
Oh, that reminds me! Next week,
I'm gonna be bringing something different.
[14:09] Akari
Seriously?!
[14:09] Hime
See you then!
[14:10] Akari
Oh, okay. Got it! Come back soon!
[14:13] Hime
Yeah!
[14:14] Akari
See you next time! Bye-bye!
[14:16] Hime
Gotta get a job!
[14:17] Hime
Gotta sweat two liters away!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[14:24] Hinata
Hey, hopscotch!
[14:26] Hinata
I remember playing this when
I was little and innocent.
[14:31] Hinata
One, two, three! One, two, three! One...
[14:39] ---
This is bad.
[14:41] Hinata
A sparrow's nest somehow fell to
at the end of this hopscotch court.
[14:45] Hinata
If I keep playing, that's gonna
be the end for those baby birds!
[14:50] Hinata
That'll make the mother super upset,
[14:51] ---
and you'll go crazy with anger,
pecking me without mercy!
[14:57] Hinata
But there's a risk in
leaving it as it is, too.
[14:59] Hinata
What do I do? What can I do?
[15:16] Hinata
Live strong, little sparrows.
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[15:23] Mugi
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[15:32] Shiro
Oh, it's Rikiya-kun! Welcome!
[15:35] Touya
It's Toya!
[15:37] Touya
Man, I am so fed up.
[15:38] Touya
Can I get some trivia about crabs, please?
SIGN Crabs
[15:44] Shiro
Sure, coming right up!
[15:46] Shiro
Did you know they're related to spiders?
[15:49] ---
That's why they have eight legs!
[15:55] Touya
I'm not quite full yet.
[15:57] ---
Can I get some more?
[16:01] ---
Trivia, go!
[16:04] Shiro
Crabs...
[16:05] Shiro
Snow crabs and red king crabs
are probably the most popular.
[16:09] Shiro
But did you know that red king crabs are
technically, specifically, hermit crabs?
[16:14] Shiro
That's why, though most crabs only
walk sideways, they're able to walk forwards.
[16:20] Shiro
And in Japanese, red king crabs got their
[16:23] ---
names from being found in
the same locations as cod.
[16:26] Shiro
They're called taraba gani!
SIGN Tara
(Cod)
SIGN ba
(Location)
SIGN Gani
(Crab)
[16:30] Shiro
Incidentally, I recommend eating red
king crab with cyber sesame sauce!
[16:38] Toya
Wow, I didn't know.
[16:39] Toya
Your trivia really is handy, Siro-chan!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[16:48] Suigetsu
Good day, everyone.
SIGN Pen Name: Suigetsu
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[16:51] Suigetsu
It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance.
[16:54] Suigetsu
My name is Suigetsu.
[16:56] Suigetsu
That's the character for "green" and
the character for "moon," for "Suigetsu."
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[17:05] Mito
I wonder who's joining me today?
[17:10] Alice
Hello, Class President!
[17:12] Alice
I heard we were due for more tea!
[17:14] Mito
Ah, good to see you, and welcome, Alice.
[17:16] Alice
It's our second tea time!
[17:17] Mito
That it is.
[17:18] Mito
Let's begin your second visit to the ultimate
"Would you rather" committee/tea party!
[17:23] Mito
Here is our subject today!
[17:25] Mito
In exchange for one hundred million yen,
[17:26] ---
every song you hear from now on will be
"We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
[17:29] Mito
A) Sounds good, or B) No way.
[17:31] Alice
"We Wish You A Merry Christmas"?
[17:34] Alice
I like that carol, but would
that mean the opening
[17:37] ---
and ending theme songs
would be replaced with it?
[17:39] Mito
That's right, that would be the case.
[17:40] Mito
This would be an anime that starts with
"We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
[17:43] Alice
Seems like a odd choice, considering.
[17:46] Mito
True enough. Not only that,
but all the music in commercials
[17:48] Mito
and the New Year's Eve concert special
would be "We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
[17:54] Alice
But I think it would vary some depending on
[17:56] ---
if say, Ai-chan or Himehina-chan
were singing it.
[17:57] Mito
Oh, good point.
[17:58] Alice
I'd like to hear all the different versions.
[18:01] Mito
True, there's no rule that says
the vocalists can't change.
[18:03] Alice
Quite right.
[18:04] Mito
But y'know, if that was the
only thing you heard otherwise,
[18:07] Mito
actually hearing "We Wish You a
Merry Christmas" during actual Christmas time
[18:11] Mito
might feel like the culmination of something,
[18:13] ---
and as a result, sound a
lot more special than usual.
[18:18] Alice
Oh, I see.
[18:19] Alice
But I think that even if I were
being paid, I wouldn't like for
[18:22] ---
all the wonderful music
in the world to disappear.
[18:25] Mito
I dunno, Alice-chan, I think...
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
[18:28] Mito
Alice-chan, the correct
answer is A) Sounds good!
[18:33] Alice
But I want to enjoy all that music!
[18:36] Mito
You need to abandon that naïve nonsense!
[18:38] Mito
Money makes the world go round!
[18:39] Mito
A rap version would
probably be allowed, also!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[18:45] Alice
While enjoying some lovely tea,
Virtual-san is once again looking today!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[18:51] Unity
Unity-chan!
[18:54] Unity
This is where it gets serious!
[18:56] Unity
Okay, let's do it!
[18:58] Unity
Gotta be careful... There!
[19:03] Unity
Wait to the last second!
[19:04] Unity
There!
[19:06] Unity
Oh, one more time!
[19:09] Unity
I did it!
[19:18] Unity
How does this happen?
SIGN Sister!
[19:27] Uma
I hope you can hear me out today, Sister.
[19:29] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[19:30] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[19:31] Uma
I've always—
[19:38] Sister
What is it?
[19:40] Sora
My friends are always getting mad at
me for not replying to their messages.
[19:44] Sora
How can I stop forgetting to respond?
[19:46] Sister
Let's see.
[19:47] Sister
The most serious response would be to
[19:49] ---
make sure you check your messages
at the end of every day,
[19:53] ---
but I imagine you wouldn't be having this
trouble if you could remember to do that.
[19:57] Sora
Exactly!
[19:58] Sister
Why not change the name on
your messaging app then?
[20:01] Sora
Huh? Not my nickname?
[20:04] Sister
Right.
[20:05] Sister
For example, you could change it to
"Tokino Sora, the Jerk Who Never Replies."
[20:10] Sora
That's crazy... but I get it!
[20:13] Sora
"Tokino Sora, the Jerk Who
Never Replies"... There!
[20:16] Sora
Now I won't get yelled at anymore! Hooray!
[20:20] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[20:22] Uma
Sister! Could you reply to the
message I sent yesterday?!
SIGN Sister!
[20:28] Unity
Virtual-san is looking!
[20:30] Unity
These croquettes are delish!
[20:35] Shiro
Okay, I've got a letter here.
[20:38] Shiro
It's from someone with
the pen name "PGGP-san."
[20:41] Everyone
Thanks for writing!
[20:43] Shiro
"Right now, I'm trying to come up
with a trick for drinking parties,
[20:47] ---
but I'm having trouble thinking up anything."
[20:49] Shiro
"Since I'm sure you all are
very talented in that regard,
[20:53] ---
could you come up with one I could use?"
[20:58] Hime
That's crazy!
[20:58] Shiro
Okay, Mito-Mito!
[21:00] Mito
Well, uh, this might get me in
trouble a lot of different ways.
[21:03] Akari
Oh, wow! What is it?!
[21:04] Mito
I'm going to do an impression of Facerig 2D.
[21:18] Hime
She's bugging out!
[21:19] Hinata
She keeps twitching!
[21:23] Shiro
Okay, okay, we're out of time,
so that's it for this week!
[21:27] Shiro
So until next week,
[21:29] Everyone
Virtual-san is looking!
[23:09] Both
Hey yo, what up! KMNZ here!
[23:11] Lita
I'm MC Lita.
[23:12] Liz
I'm MC Liz.
[23:13] Lita
Another day, another episode!
[23:14] Liz
Good work people!
[23:15] Lita
I've been so busy I forgot to
eat dinner, so I'm starving!
[23:17] Lita
Did you remember to eat, Liz?
[23:19] Liz
Yep, I made sure to get something
good in me! It was really tasty!
[23:22] Lita
Sounds great, what did you eat?
[23:23] Liz
Pineapple!
[23:24] Lita
Oh, big juicy pineapples!
[23:28] Both
There were two dirty jokes
hidden in that conversation.
[23:30] ---
Did you notice?
[23:32] Liz
Next week is "Letting Your
Horse Carry You Whenever."
SIGN Next Time
"Letting Your Horse Carry You Whenever"
[23:34] Lita
And next week,
[23:35] Both
Virtual-san will still be looking!
E10 - Letting Your Horse Carry You Whenever
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Peanuts
They say that a camel's
humps are filled with fat.
[00:06] Uma
Hey, hey, hey, hey, what are
you filled with, Peanut?
[00:08] Peanuts
I'm filled with heart, you horsey bastard!
[00:10] Uma
That's a good one!
[00:10] Peanuts
Shut it!
[00:14] Hina
To, to, tomato!
[00:16] Hina
Pronunciation is really hard.
[00:18] Hina
Tomato!
[00:21] Shiro
Oh, are you practicing English?
[00:23] Hina
Yeah!
[00:24] Akari
English pronunciation is so hard!
[00:29] Mito
Good morning, everyone.
[00:31] Shiro
Good morning, Mito-Mito!
[00:33] Mito
You want to talk about English, right?
[00:35] Mito
Then leave it to me!
[00:37] Mito
We'll start with you, Tanaka-san.
[00:39] Hime
Virtual.
[00:40] Mito
No! Next!
[00:42] Hinata
Virtual!
[00:43] Mito
My, that is adorable.
[00:45] Akari
Virtuaaal!
[00:47] Mito
Who was that supposed to be?
[00:48] Mito
Come on, everyone, this is no good!
[00:50] Mito
I guess I'll have to show an example...
[00:52] Shiro
Virtual.
[00:53] Mito
What?
[00:54] Shiro
Virtual.
[00:55] Everyone
Wow!
[00:56] Everyone
Nice one, Siro-chan!
[00:56] Everyone
That was great!
[01:01] Everyone
I mean,that is to say, exactly
what I expected from Siro-sama.
[01:04] Everyone
Although your inflection was slightly off.
[01:08] Shiro
Teacher, why don't you show us an example?!
[01:10] Mito
Uh, well, let's see, um...
[01:13] Mito
V... Vir... Virtu...
[01:16] Mito
Oh, no! Look at the time!
Gather around, everyone!
[01:19] Hinata
She dodged it.
[01:20] Hina
She totally dodged it.
[01:22] Hina
Mito-sensei, are you going to pronounce
it the English way this week?
[01:24] Mito
No! But as virtual youtubers,
we need to focus on Japanese!
[01:27] Mito
You need a sturdy base to work with!
[01:29] Mito
Ready and...
[01:30] Mito
Virtual-san is looking!
[03:17] Akari
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 4
[03:23] Akari
Eek, something weird touched me!
[03:26] Hime
Oh, that was me.
[03:27] Mito
What are you two trying to do in
the middle of this confusion?!
SIGN Mob C
[03:32] Mob C
Wh-Who are you?!
[03:38] Robo
Everyone! Get on, quick!
[03:40] Hime
It transformed!
[03:41] Hina
A Transfor—
[03:42] Mito
Noooope!
[03:46] Mito
Thank you for rescuing us.
[03:48] Robo
It's nothing.
[03:49] Akari
Hey, can I ask you something?
[03:51] Robo
Sure.
[03:52] Akari
Out of the six of us, who's your type?
[03:58] Robo
Ow, ow, ow! Why would you ask that now?!
[04:01] Akari
Because I'm curious!
[04:03] Hina
Now that you mention it, I might be, too.
[04:05] Hinata
We can decide who is on top
of the group's hierarchy...
[04:09] Shiro
Who gets to be the center of the unit?!
[04:12] Robo
No, no, no...
[04:13] Robo
I mean, getting asked out
of the blue like this...
SIGN To Be Continued
SIGN Virtual Kerin Slayer Wars
[04:33] Haruto
You're all going to pay for this.
[04:36] Ryo
Haru-kun, calm down!
We finally managed to get out of those suits.
[04:39] Hime
You got a problem?!
[04:40] Hime
You want those streaks yanked off your
head and replaced with smiley dumplings?!
[04:42] Hina
Down, down, girl... Easy does it.
[04:44] Haruto
Little girl, the fact that you have
pink hair is enough to disgust me!
[04:48] Miria
Harutrash, are you talking about me?
[04:52] Ryo
You need to stay calm too, Miria-chan!
[04:54] Kaede
Let's all just calm down and
try and find the culprit.
[04:56] Kaede
Don't you agree, Kerin-kun?
[04:57] Kerin
Well... Uh...
[04:59] Kerin
Those two Kerin Slayers
came after me, so I...
[05:02] Hime
You're the one who actually started it!
[05:04] Ryo
I feel kind of sorry for Kerin-kun.
[05:06] Kerin
Damn it all! I guess we're doing this!
[05:10] Kerin
This is their fault anyway!
[05:13] Kerin
But I guess I'll have to take you all down!
[05:16] Hina
W-Wait, stop, Kerin!
[05:19] Kerin
Super Ultimate Transformation
Magic, Buchisplurge!
[05:23] Kaede
That sounds dangerous...
[05:25] Hina
If we keep having to deal with him
we're risking mental pollution!
[05:28] Hina
Game Club! We need to work together
to stop Kerin from going berserk!
[05:32] Ryo
I agree! Chief! Haru-kun! Miria-chan!
Let's follow her orders for now!
[05:36] Kaede
Got it!
[05:37] Miria
Aye, aye, sir!
[05:39] Haruto
I suppose we have to!
[05:40] Hime
We'll pincer Kerin from the sides,
and then you all will use these!
[05:44] Hime
Nin!
[05:46] Miria
Wh-What the...?
[05:47] Ryo
Wow! These look powerful!
[05:49] Hina
Run Kerin through with those swords!
[05:51] Kerin
Hey, what's going on?!
[05:53] Kerin
Are we doing this, or not?!
[05:56] Kerin
You wanna get turned into tuna?!
[05:57] Kerin
Or maybe amberjack?!
[05:59] Hina
Hime, go!
[06:00] Hime
Yeah! Ninsplurge!
[06:02] Kerin
Damn it! Can't move...
[06:04] Hime & Hina
Now! Go!
[06:17] Kerin
Oh, no, not there!
[06:19] Hime
He's tougher than I thought.
[06:20] Hina
And seems to be enjoying it a little.
[06:22] Haruto
Hey, pink fool, you sure you
didn't stab him the wrong way?
[06:25] Miria
You stabbed him the wrong spot, Harutrash!
[06:27] Kerin
I guess that's the best you can muster!
[06:30] Kerin
Even together, you're no
match for the mighty Kerin!
[06:35] Kaede
I guess the swords aren't enough!
[06:37] Kaede
Do we have anything stronger?
[06:38] Ryo
Damn it, we almost had him!
[06:41] Ryo
He even looks like a pirate now!
[06:45] Hime
I understand.
This is a forbidden spell, but...
[06:48] Hina
Are you talking about... that?
[06:50] Hime
Let's do it.
[06:51] Haruto
Some sort of secret weapon?
[06:52] Haruto
You should've used it in the first place!
[06:55] Hime & Hina
In the name of the Girly Girl empire...
[06:57] Hime & Hina
In exchange for the life of the
dark one, grant us a weapon!
[07:01] Haruto
Wh-What the?! My body's floating!
[07:04] Hime & Hina
The Wicked Blade, Harutrash Sword!
[07:07] Miria
Harutrash...
[07:09] Miria
just turned into a sword!
[07:10] Miria
Hilarious.
[07:11] Kaede
Amazing! I had no idea he
had an alternate form!
[07:14] Haruto
Hey, what's the meaning
of this?! Ryo, save me!
[07:16] Ryo
Good luck, Haru-kun!
[07:18] Hime
Everyone, lend us your strength!
[07:20] Hina
We do this on go! Ready... go!
[07:22] Everyone
Harutrash Sword!
[07:26] Kerin
W-Wait! Stay back!
[07:28] Kerin
S-Stop!
[07:31] Both
We're getting blown away!
[07:35] Hina
That was a close one.
[07:38] Kaede
Thanks, Himehina-chan! I had no
idea magic like that existed.
[07:41] Ryo
That was a lot of fun!
I'm glad we crashed from space.
[07:44] Hime
Really?
[07:45] Hime
Harutrash just turned into
stardust, is that okay?
[07:48] Miria
Sure it is! Maybe that'll help
him cool off a little bit.
[07:53] Hina
You guys are really nice to Haruto-kun!
[07:56] Miria
Anyway, let's all play a game!
[07:59] Kaede
Good idea! Which one, though?
[08:02] Hime
Maybe Pop-Up Pirate?
[08:04] Hime
You're getting skewered next, Ryo-kun!
[08:06] Ryo
Aw, cut it out, Hime-chan!
[08:10] Haruto
Think of a way out of this!
[08:11] Kerin
Would you get out of me already?!
[08:13] Haruto
You need to pull me out or I'll blow you up!
[08:16] Kerin
Hey, that's my catchphrase!
[08:18] Haruto
Damn it! The five of them will pay for this!
SIGN Kerin Slayer
[08:30] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
[08:33] Grandma
Bunmei Kaika.
SIGN Today's Phrase:
Bunmei Kaika
[08:36] G
That's the phrase.
[08:38] G
It refers to, as human knowledge grows,
the world becomes more convenient.
[08:43] G
For example, can you all imagine
a time before package delivery?
[08:48] G
In the old days, your
only options for packages
[08:51] G
were the postal service
and railway delivery.
[08:55] G
The courier services first began serious
adoption in the latter half of the 1970s,
[09:00] G
developed through the 1980s, and only recently,
came to resemble what we have today.
[09:07] G
Come to think of it, you used to get
packages that came in solid wood boxes.
[09:11] G
And not a nice one either,
[09:13] G
but one that was crudely tied shut
with rope, that you had to force open.
[09:17] G
I imagine in those days, cardboard wasn't
as easy to get a hold of as it is now.
[09:23] G
Oh, a wooden box.
[09:25] G
Here we go.
[09:27] Uma
Woof!
[09:29] G
No, no, not woof...
[09:31] G
Aren't you a horse?
[09:33] Uma
Wofooom!
[09:41] Mito
Virtual-san is looking!
[09:47] Siro
Virtual-san is looking.
[09:53] Aoi
No guests ever seen to come by...
[09:55] Gori
Aoi-san is depressed.
I wish I could cheer her up.
[09:59] Gori
Aoi-san!
[10:00] Aoi
What is it?
[10:01] Gori
Get a load of this trick I can do!
[10:03] Gori
Come on, bananas!
[10:06] Gori
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
[10:08] Gori
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
[10:11] Gori
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
[10:12] Gori
Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!
[10:14] Aoi
Why is it raining bananas?!
[10:15] Gori
Hello! Hello! Hello!
[10:16] Gori
Heh-heh-hello!
Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-hello!
[10:20] Gori
I was hoping I could cheer you up
by practicing by banana catching...
[10:24] Aoi
Uh, making it rain bananas
is way more impressive!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[10:27] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
[10:29] Gori
Hello!
[10:32] Mito
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble Akari-chan!
[10:36] Mito
I'm telling you, Akari-chan,
there's big trouble!
[10:40] Akari
What's wrong— Mito-chan?!
[10:43] Mito
Akari-san, there's big trouble afoot!
[10:45] Akari
There is?
[10:46] Akari
Oh, I guess you're taking over from now on!
[10:48] Mito
Indeed I am!
[10:49] Akari
So what is it?
[10:50] Mito
Penname Hitomi-chan, also known as
Tomi-Tomi, is worried about something!
[10:53] Mito
Please read this!
[10:55] Akari
AKA Tomi Tomi?
I wonder if it actually says that.
[10:57] Mito
No, rather, I was the one who decided that.
[11:00] Akari
I like it, it's cute! Tomi Tomi.
[11:01] Mito
Yes, indeed.
[11:02] Akari
Anyway, "Akari-san, hello."
[11:04] Mito
Hello there.
[11:04] Akari
Hello.
[11:05] Akari
"I'm a middle school student,"
[11:07] Akari
"and I really want to
become class president!"
[11:10] Akari
"But I'm not quite brave
enough to nominate myself."
[11:13] Akari
"Please tell me how to guarantee
victory if I do run!"
[11:17] Mito
A guaranteed victory...
SIGN Problem: How to guarantee
a student council victory?
[11:20] Akari
Someone's greedy!
[11:21] Mito
It seems so, but as older ladies,
let's provide some answers.
[11:23] Akari
Good idea.
[11:24] Akari
Let's see, what kind of people
are suited for student council?
[11:28] Mito
Well, let me think.
[11:29] Mito
I think people who can't
make a strong impression
[11:31] Mito
will be doomed when the time
for speeches comes around.
[11:34] Akari
Oh, yeah, true. You can't be
throwing wimpy punches out there.
[11:35] Mito
Exactly!
[11:36] Mito
So you need to be able to draw a line!
[11:38] Mito
It needs to be the kind of person who can
say "no" definitively, and really mean it!
[11:40] Akari
Like an American?
[11:42] Mito
An American?
[11:43] Mito
I didn't mean that in the
literal, linguistic sense!
[11:45] Mito
I just meant no as in a negative response!
[11:47] Mito
We're not trying to answer riddles here!
[11:50] Akari
But Hitomi-chan wants guaranteed victory
in the student council election, right?
[11:56] Mito
Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
[11:59] Yami
Bribe 'em!
SIGN Yami
SIGN Hikari
[12:01] Hikari
Bzzt!
[12:03] Hikari
That's a terrible idea,
and we're talking about a student,
[12:06] Hikari
so it's not like she'd
have a lot of money.
[12:08] Yami
How about handing out some
tasty Japanese sweets, then?
[12:12] Hikari
That's not exactly legitimate, either.
[12:16] Yami
Well... You could always lure
your rival out behind the gym,
[12:19] Yami
sneak up behind them, and then—
[12:21] Hikari
Bzzzzt! Nope, nope, nope!
[12:24] Hikari
Sorry, Akari, take it from here.
[12:29] Mito
Hello? Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
[12:33] Akari
My consciousness was somewhere else...
[12:34] Mito
Welcome back, then.
[12:35] Akari
Good to be back.
[12:37] Akari
Penname Hitomi-chan! Here's the bottom line!
[12:42] Mito
She's going to expose it!
Her bottom... line!
[12:45] Akari
Start referring to yourself exclusively
as student council president!
[12:50] Akari
Right now, Hitomi-chan probably thinks
of herself as "me" or "Hitomi,"
SIGN The class prez thinks ...
[12:55] Akari
but starting tomorrow, she needs to
do it exclusively as "Class Prez!"
[12:59] Akari
"As class president, I think this" and
[13:02] Akari
"The class president is kind
of tired", that sorta thing.
[13:04] Mito
So just declare it herself?
[13:06] Akari
Exactly!
[13:06] Akari
If you keep it up for long
enough, and act naturally,
[13:10] Akari
people will be brainwashed into thinking
"Oh, she must be class president."
[13:13] Mito
Is that really possible?!
[13:14] Akari
You bet it is!
[13:16] Akari
Not only that, but you need
to always wear the sash!
[13:18] Akari
Like you're telling people
"I'm the class president!"
[13:20] Mito
I don't think I've ever seen an actual
class president wear one of those...
[13:22] Akari
You can even force people to
start working on projects!
[13:24] Akari
Like telling the discipline
officer to do something,
[13:26] Akari
or asking a teacher about the schedule for
the meeting with the parents association...
[13:29] Mito
That's certainly the direct approach!
[13:31] Akari
And eventually, no one will doubt that
Hitomi-chan is the class president anymore,
[13:35] Akari
so no one will even think about candidates
or voting in the first place!
[13:39] Mito
Undermining the entire electoral process!
[13:41] Akari
You've got to keep a dream in your heart...
[13:42] Akari
Keeping it in your boobs won't do any good!
[13:43] Mito
I'm not sure what that
turn of phrase implies?
[13:44] Akari
You've gotta talk the talk!
[13:46] Mito
This has been educational.
[13:48] Akari
Starting tomorrow, when you
talk to your family or friends,
[13:51] Akari
or even give your name for
an order at restaurant...
[13:53] Mito
Even then?
[13:54] Akari
You always refer to yourself as class prez!
[13:56] Akari
That kind of passion is what will
take you to greater heights!
[14:01] Mito
Impressive, Akari-san!
[14:03] Mito
I'll be on my way, then.
[14:05] Akari
But I didn't get to slurp
on your zettai ryoiki yet!
[14:08] Mito
The script says I should say I'll be back,
but that comment really makes me not want to!
[14:10] Akari
Hey!
[14:11] Akari
Well, see you next time, Mito-chan! Bye-bye!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[14:26] Hinata
I want to score some headshots!
[14:34] Hinata
Oh, this is bad.
[14:36] Hinata
The other day, Akari-chan popped
out from inside those pipes.
[14:38] Hinata
They might make a good hiding spot.
[14:41] Hinata
If I were to set up in
position with a 4x scope...
[14:43] Hinata
The second a head pops out from
the left of the pipe, bang!
[14:46] Hinata
Or, from the right, bang!
[14:48] Hinata
And even if they're behind the pipes,
and their head pops up, bang!
[14:52] Hinata
But if I'm noticed, they might be
able to pop smoke and get away...
[14:56] Hinata
Can I really nail them with a single shot?
[14:59] Hinata
I wonder what would be best...
[15:05] Hinata
I've got it!
[15:07] Hinata
This is too much of a pain!
[15:08] Hinata
I'm going to get in close and
go for the kill with grenades!
[15:11] Hinata
Time to turn that horsey
bastard into horse sashimi!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[15:21] Hinata
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[15:29] Shiro
Oh, it's Futaba-chan! Welcome!
[15:33] 2ba
Oh, I am so fed up...
[15:36] 2ba
Can I get some trivia about names, please?
SIGN Trivia, go!
[15:45] Shiro
Names.
[15:46] Shiro
There's a lot of locations around the world
[15:48] Shiro
with names that sound like
Japanese homophones.
[15:51] Shiro
Like the tourist town in Argentina,
[15:53] Shiro
whose name sounds like
"Maru de aho" or "like an idiot,"
[15:56] Shiro
but it's Mar de Ajó,
which means sea of garlic!
[15:59] Shiro
There's a mountain in Indonesia
named "Baka" like stupid,
[16:03] Shiro
but in Indonesian, baka can
mean eternity or family.
[16:08] Shiro
There's also a famous example
that's a little exciting,
[16:12] Shiro
the nation of Vanuatu has
an island called Erromango,
[16:15] Shiro
but it means "humans" in the local
language, and not sexy comics!
[16:19] Shiro
When you think about how baka
can mean eternity and family,
[16:22] Shiro
and how ero manga can mean human,
[16:26] Shiro
it really makes you realize how versatile
language can be, doesn't it?
[16:31] Futaba
Wow, really?
[16:34] Futaba
Your trivia is always so handy, Shiro-chan.
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[16:40] Koko
Living life in a daze...
SIGN Pen Name: Torimochi Koko
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[16:43] Koko
I'm from Virtual Cast!
[16:47] Koko
And my name is Torimochi Koko.
[16:50] Koko
Okay?
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[16:54] Mito
This feeling... I've got chills again.
[17:05] Mito
Mugi-chan! Please quiet down!
[17:06] Mito
You're going to rupture my eardrums!
[17:08] Mugi
I'm sorry Class Prez.
[17:10] Mugi
I'm just so scared when I'm alone...
[17:11] Mito
Well I'm sorry for scaring you,
[17:14] Mito
but it's time to do the the ultimate
"Would you rather" committee.
[17:16] Mugi
Right.
[17:16] Mito
Here's our subject for today!
[17:18] Mito
Which would you rather lose the
use of for the rest of your life?
[17:22] Mito
A) Z characters
[17:23] Mito
B) P characters
[17:24] Mugi
I'm not sure I understand, Class Prez.
[17:27] Mito
Basically would you rather lose all the
Japanese words that use za ji zu ze zo,
[17:30] Mito
or pa pi pu pe po.
[17:31] Mugi
I see!
[17:33] Mugi
Well I don't really say party
hard or panties or pisser,
[17:36] Mugi
so I guess I could do without the Ps.
[17:38] Mito
Those are some fairly
crass words, I suppose.
[17:41] Mugi
I think so.
[17:42] Mito
But you wouldn't be able to say pirika
pirilala poporina peperuto anymore.
[17:46] Mugi
That's a little before my time...
[17:48] Mugi
For my generation, the transformation
phrase is "Metamorphose!"
[17:52] Mito
Oh, I see. So I'd be the
one who couldn't use that.
[17:55] Mugi
Right.
[17:56] Mito
But I have a plan in mind.
[17:58] Mito
See, you just need to become a gal.
[17:59] Mugi
Become a gal?
[18:00] Mito
See, when you write out how a gal speaks,
[18:02] Mito
instead of putting the dots
next to the character for shi,
[18:03] Mito
you put it next to the ones for chi.
[18:05] Mugi
I see!
[18:06] Mito
That being the case...
[18:08] Mito
OMG Mugi Mugi, I just can't
even with school tomorrow.
[18:11] Mugi
I just can't even, too.
[18:12] Mito
We're bffs, right?
[18:13] Mugi
W-We are?
[18:14] Mito
Total besties, amirite?
[18:15] Mugi
Besties?
[18:17] Mito
See how that works?
[18:17] Mugi
I see... not exactly dignified, though.
[18:20] Mito
OMG it's like 3 RN,
[18:22] Mito
wasn't sure, at first, but it's totes the Zs.
[18:28] Mito
So, like, us virtual youtubers
are totes bffs forever!
[18:33] Mugi
Senpai, that idea was wicked pissah! Party hard!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[18:41] Toya
Virtual-san is looking.
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[18:44] Unity
Unity-chan.
[18:46] Hinata
From pen name, King of Kings.
[18:48] Everybody
Thanks for writing!
[18:50] Hinata
"I have a question for you all."
[18:52] Hinata
"If you were the kings of a country,
what kind of nation would you build?"
[18:58] Hinata
He asks.
SIGN If you were king, what would
your kingdom be like?
[18:59] Hina
Good question!
[19:00] Akari
If I was royalty, I'd want to make
a law where wherever I go out—
[19:02] Unity
Fear not!
[19:03] Unity
For I am the king...
[19:09] Unity
Croquettes... yummy...
SIGN Sister!
[19:20] Uma
I hope I finally get to
say this today, Sister.
[19:22] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[19:24] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[19:24] Uma
About a year ago—
[19:30] Sister
What is it?
[19:31] Sora
When I go to bed, the ticking of the seconds
hand bothers me and I can't sleep.
[19:34] Sora
I'm worried I'll never get enough rest...
[19:37] Sister
I see. Have you tried listening
to some music you enjoy?
[19:41] Sora
I tried, but it still bothered me.
[19:43] Sister
Well in that case, maybe you
could keep a tiger in your room,
[19:46] Sister
so that you have more pressing concerns
than the ticking of a clock.
[19:49] Sora
I get you! That'd definitely
be more worrying.
[19:51] Sora
But wouldn't I get eaten?
[19:54] Sister
That is a risk, yes.
[19:56] Sora
I don't wanna, then!
[19:57] Sister
Then you may have to resort
to desperate measures.
[20:00] Sora
Desperate measures?
[20:02] Sister
Switching to a digital clock!
[20:04] Sora
I didn't think of that!
[20:05] Sora
I'm gonna get plenty of rest tonight!
Thank you, Sister!
[20:08] Uma
Shouldn't that have been
what you tried first?!
[20:10] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[20:14] Uma
At the time of the scream, it will be 12:00.
[20:21] Uma
Sister!
SIGN Sister!
[20:27] Unity
Virtual-san is looking!
[20:29] Unity
Yeah!
[20:31] Hime
Okay, I've got a letter here from
pen name, Festival Wasshoi-san!
[20:36] Everyone
Thanks for writing!
[20:39] Hime
"Of all the events at school,
I love the culture fest the most."
[20:43] Hime
"If you were going to put on
a virtual culture festival,
[20:46] Hime
what kind of attractions would you have?"
SIGN What would you do for a
virtual culture festival?
[20:49] Akari
Oh, me, me, me!
[20:49] Hime
What is it?
[20:50] Akari
Let's see, I'd have a big
skirt flipping contest!
[20:53] Shiro
Beep, beep! Beep, beep!
[20:54] Akari
You get like giant fan or something,
and kick up a huge breeze,
[20:57] Akari
and the girls skirts all
go flapping in the wind!
[21:00] Mito
That runs the risk of getting classified as
a certain type of business, so let's not!
[21:03] Shiro
Oh, I've got one, here!
[21:05] Hime
Sure, what is it?
[21:05] Shiro
You know how humans tend to end
their culture festivals with a big bonfire?
[21:10] Shiro
And how cleaning up after an event
is always a lot of work?
[21:15] Shiro
So what you do when you're done
[21:16] Shiro
is throw everything into the fire,
including the attendees,
[21:19] Shiro
and it'll all be nice and clean!
[21:19] Mito
What you're describing
is kind of terrifying...
[21:20] Akari
It's a kebab festival!
SIGN The suggestions continued to be dangerous,
so we're forcing this segment to a close.
[21:28] Hime
Okay, and that does it for this week!
[21:30] Hime
So until next time,
[21:32] All
Virtual-san is looking!
[23:13] Pino
Good day to you. I'm Karuro Pino.
SIGN Karuro Pino
SIGN Kagura Suzu
[23:15] Suzu
Good afternoon, Kagura Suzu here.
[23:17] Pino
Say, Suzu-oneechan, would you
like to play insect shiritori?
[23:19] Suzu
Insect shiritori? What do you mean?
[23:21] Pino
You just play shiritori with the name of bugs.
[23:23] Suzu
Bug names?
[23:24] Pino
Here we go! Cricket!
[23:25] Suzu
Are— Are we really just starting?
[23:28] Pino
Yes we are!
[23:30] Suzu
T... Termite!
[23:31] Pino
E... Earwig!
[23:32] Suzu
I'm already uncomfortable with this!
[23:34] Pino
Next time is "Granny."
SIGN Next Time: "Granny"
[23:35] Suzu
And next week,
[23:36] Both
Virtual-san will be looking!
E11 - Granny
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Peanut
They say that most polar
bears are left-handed.
[00:06] Uma
Hey, hey...
[00:09] Peanut
You bastard!
[00:14] Shiro
We who are virtual must always be refined.
SIGN Fiberoptic Virtual Student Dorm
[00:18] Mito
Ah, yes, the "refinement first" mindset!
[00:21] Shiro
Yes!
[00:21] Shiro
And I believe today is a good day to
teach everyone about being refined.
[00:27] Mito
You can't just try and
be dignified, of course.
[00:29] Mito
You have to really follow through!
[00:30] Mito
Siro-san, if you'd offer an example.
[00:33] Shiro
I intend to become an idol,
[00:34] Shiro
and also have total dominion over
the human race's internal organs!
[00:38] Everyone
Now that's refined!
[00:39] Akari
Super re-fine fine fine!
[00:43] Hime
I want to see Mito-sama do an example too!
[00:47] Hinata
Careful now! This is
going to be really refined.
[00:49] Mito
Uh...
[00:50] Hina
Social media is going to be
blowing up with #refined today!
[00:55] Mito
Hang on, everyone.
[00:56] Mito
I get the feeling you're really
expecting a lot from me here.
[00:59] Shiro
Now, let's get a glimpse of
how refined Mito-sama is.
[01:02] Everyone
Three!
[01:03] Mito
A countdown?!
[01:03] Everyone
Two!
[01:04] Everyone
One!
[01:05] Everyone
Go!
[01:08] Mito
The latest and greatest...
[01:10] Mito
Transcendentally, splendiferously
refined class president!
[01:13] Mito
The woman who loves,
and is loved by, refinement—
SIGN We apologize for this unsightly display of refinement.
[01:19] Shiro
Well, let's put what we learned
in today's lesson to use!
[01:23] Shiro
Ready, and...
[01:25] Shiro
Virtual-san is looking!
[03:12] Elu
Virtual-san is looking, elu elu.
SIGN Virtual Real
Was Looking
Episode 5
[03:19] Shiro
It's a giant Siro!
[03:21] Hime
Where did it come from?!
[03:24] Mito
I think I understand what's going on.
[03:26] Mito
Could it be that this world is your...
[03:33] Mob D
Hold it!
[03:37] Mob D
Remove them! By force!
[03:40] Akari
In public, during broad daylight? We can't!
[03:43] Mito
Again, I'm not sure what you're imagining!
[03:47] Mob D
You need to hand them over!
SIGN Mob D
[03:51] Robo
I... can't do that!
[03:53] Mob D
Then we'll remove you by force, too!
[03:56] Mob D
Remove by force!
[03:58] Mob D
Remove by force!
[03:59] Mob D
Remove by force!
[04:01] Akari
What do we do?
[04:02] Mito
We'll just have to watch over him.
[04:05] Mito
This is an important battle,
one that can't be avoided.
[04:10] Shiro
But at this rate, he'll...
[04:14] Mito
He's the one who will determine
whether or not this world can change.
SIGN To Be Continued
[04:26] Shiro
I thought we were done for!
[04:28] Shiro
It's such a relief to be alive!
[04:30] Akari
Hey, do you guys want to do a barbecue?
[04:33] Akari
While the weather's still cold!
[04:34] Hina
Meat! Yes!
[04:36] Hime
I'm in! I'm ready to eat!
[04:38] Hinata
Me too!
[04:39] Mito
I get the feeling this group
is all eaters and no cooks.
[04:42] Shiro
Hey, if you were going to bring one thing
to the barbecue, what would it be?
[04:47] Hime
Meat buns!
[04:47] Akari
Ginkgo nuts, ginkgo nuts!
Ginkgo nuts, ginkgo nuts!
[04:54] Akari
That scared me!
[04:56] Akari
What was that shaking—
[04:57] Akari
Hey, look outside!
[05:00] Everyone
Magma?!
[05:02] Shiro
Are we on a volcano again?!
[05:04] Hina
No, we're even closer to one this time!
[05:08] Mito
You're right, the bottom of
my feet feel really hot!
[05:10] Mito
Like we're being cooked from below!
[05:13] Hina
Hot, hot!
[05:13] Hina
Great, looks like we're gonna
be served at the barbecue!
[05:17] Hinata
But I like eating, not being eaten!
[05:21] Akari
Oh, fine, then... I'll just have to
eat you up then, Hinata-chan!
[05:30] Mito
Everyone, calm down.
[05:32] Mito
I think we're basically done for.
[05:34] Mito
No sense in fighting it.
[05:36] Mito
Let's all get in some proper
last words before we pass on.
[05:38] Mito
If you'd start us off, Akari-san.
[05:40] Akari
Right.
[05:40] Akari
Hear me well...
[05:42] Akari
Don't you ever stop!
[05:44] Hina
What next?
[05:46] Mito
If you'd go ahead, Siro-san.
[05:48] Siro
Horse, thank you for everything.
[05:52] Mito
Hime-san, you're up.
[05:54] Hime
In my next life... I'll be the
number one chuckling dumpling!
[05:58] Akari
You're the only one of those.
[05:59] Mito
Very much so.
[06:01] Mito
Go ahead, Hina-san.
[06:03] Hina
Make sure to dunk my computer in the tub.
[06:07] Akari
That's a good idea! A really good idea!
[06:09] Mito
You're next, Hinata-san.
[06:11] Hinata
I have no regrets about the life I have lived!
[06:15] Everyone
So cool!
[06:17] Mito
I'll go ahead and wrap it up, then.
[06:19] Mito
Uh, thank you for having us here,
[06:22] Mito
on this wonderful occasion on
a clear, but magma-filled, day.
[06:25] Mito
It's said that there are three
types of sanctity in life, which...
[06:28] Hime
Too long!
[06:29] Shiro
I don't know what it is,
but I'm starting to feel good!
[06:34] Hinata
Something about sinking
into magma like this...
[06:37] Hinata
It reminds me of that movie.
[06:41] Hime
In that case, let's end it with that line!
[06:43] Hime
Ready, and...
[06:44] Everyone
I'll be back!
[06:55] Sora
Let's say it together!
[06:57] Sora
Virtual-san is looking!
[07:02] Uma
Virtual-san is looking.
[07:04] Uma
And so am I.
[07:12] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:13] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:14] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:15] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:16] Gori
It's a monkey!
SIGN A... monkey?
[07:20] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:21] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:22] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:23] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:24] Gori
On a southern island!
SIGN Does he mean South Africa?
[07:27] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:28] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:29] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:30] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:31] Gori
With the long tail!
SIGN A tail...?
[07:35] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:36] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:37] Gori
Hello, hello!
[07:38] Aoi
Hello, hello!
[07:39] Gori
There was a monkey!
[07:43] Aoi
Dude, you've got it wrong.
[07:44] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[07:47] Gori
Hello.
[07:50] Mito
Big trouble, big trouble!
SIGN Big trouble, Akari-chan!
[07:55] Mito
Akari-chan, there's really big trouble!
[08:05] Akari
What is it, Mito-chan?
[08:06] Mito
Akari-san, we've got really big trouble!
[08:08] Akari
Don't cry! What is it? What's wrong?
[08:11] Mito
Someone with the pen name "Manami-chan,
[08:13] Mito
a.k.a. Omana," is worried about something!
[08:14] Akari
Omana!
[08:15] Mito
Please, read this.
[08:16] Akari
Got it. Omana, huh? Okay.
[08:18] Akari
"Akari-san, hello."
[08:19] Mito
Hello.
[08:20] Akari
H'lo!
[08:21] Akari
I'm in my second year of
college and looking for jobs,
[08:23] Akari
but during interviews,
I always get too nervous to talk.
[08:24] Mito
Right, right, right.
[08:24] Akari
Please, tell me how to stay
cool in important situations!
[08:32] Mito
Well, I'm a high schools student, butts...
SIGN Problem: How to not get nervous
during important moments?
[08:35] Mito
I mean, a high school student, but—
[08:36] Akari
High school student butts!
[08:38] Mito
A high school student, however!
[08:39] Akari
Yeah?
[08:40] Mito
However, since I've been lucky enough
to be in assorted big productions,
[08:44] Mito
I understand how she feels!
[08:45] Akari
Oh, yeah, it's easy to get nervous.
[08:46] Mito
Especially with interviews.
[08:48] Akari
Let's see, a way to not get nervous in
critical situations, so you can act normal...
[08:52] Akari
What would be the trick?
[08:57] Mito
Oh, Mirai-san? Mirai-san!
[09:01] Yami
No need to be nervous.
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[09:03] Yami
Nobody doing an interview is
gonna be worth a damn anyway.
[09:06] Hikari
That's not true!
[09:09] Hikari
I'm sure that if they're doing the interviews,
they have to be important!
[09:13] Yami
That kind of naïve crap is why people
get choked up in the first place.
[09:18] Yami
Just mess around on your
phone and answer casually.
[09:22] Hikari
There's no way you'd get
a job with that attitude!
[09:27] Yami
Well... I don't care!
[09:31] Hikari
No good... Akari, you take it from here!
[09:35] Mito
Hello? Mirai-san! Mirai-san?!
[09:39] Akari
Sorry, I'm back.
[09:41] Mito
Welcome back.
[09:43] Akari
Pen name Manami-chan! Here's the bottom line!
[09:47] Mito
She's going to expose it!
Her firm bottom line!
[09:51] Akari
You need to go to a toy store!
[09:54] Akari
The best thing to do when you're
nervous is to focus on a simple task.
[09:59] Mito
I see.
[10:00] Akari
Apparently, if you talk while doing a
jigsaw puzzle, you'll naturally be less tense!
[10:04] Mito
I see!
[10:05] Mito
You're dividing your attention, essentially.
[10:07] Akari
Right!
[10:08] Akari
So Manami-chan should head to a
toy store and buy a Rubik's Cube!
[10:14] Akari
Then she should practice
with it a bunch at home!
[10:16] Akari
Until she can solve it in five minutes!
[10:18] Akari
Then, when it's time for
the interview, she says this:
[10:21] Akari
"I've got a talent for solving Rubik's Cubes.
[10:24] Akari
I'm going to solve this one
before this interview is over."
[10:27] Mito
Is that a good idea?!
[10:29] Akari
Then she focuses on the Rubik's Cube!
[10:31] Akari
There's a time limit, after all.
[10:32] Mito
But she has to answer the
interview questions, too.
[10:35] Akari
It'll be fine!
[10:36] Mito
"Is there anything you're
focused on at the moment?"
[10:41] Akari
"Getting this red side sorted, I'd say."
[10:44] Mito
That's not the point of the question!
[10:46] Akari
But did you notice, Mito-chan?
[10:48] Akari
Wasn't nervous at all, was I?
[10:50] Mito
Y-You're right!
[10:52] Akari
And then once she solves
it like she said, it'll be like,
[10:56] Akari
"She can really deliver on what she says!"
[10:58] Akari
Talk about leaving a positive impression!
[11:01] Mito
Not getting nervous and passing the interview!
Two birds with one stone!
[11:05] Akari
Now all that's left is to
practice with a Rubik's Cube!
[11:08] Mito
Oh, right, right.
[11:09] Mito
Someone else is going to
bring the letter by next week!
[11:12] Akari
This is your last time, Mito-chan?
[11:13] Mito
Yes!
[11:14] Akari
I'll miss you! Let me give you a lick!
[11:16] Mito
If you'll excuse me!
[11:17] Akari
Bye-bye!
[11:18] Mito
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[11:30] Hime
This is finally the last one!
[11:33] Hime
Augh, it's the old maid!
[11:38] Hinata
Looks like I win!
[11:39] Hinata
There!
[11:40] Hinata
It's the old maid!
[11:44] Hime
It seems that God wants me to win.
[11:47] Hime
That one!
[11:49] Hime
It's the old maid again!
[11:51] Hinata
This is quite a battle.
[11:53] Hinata
But... this will be the end!
[11:56] Hinata
I win—again?!
[11:59] Hinata
I'm getting tired of this.
[12:02] Hime
This joker sure does turn up a lot!
[12:06] Hime
Not again!
[12:09] Hinata
I don't wanna run into the old maid again.
[12:13] Mito
You two are going to be late!
[12:15] Both
The old maid!
[12:16] Mito
Who the hell are you calling an old maid?!
[12:19] Hime & Other Hina
Run for it!
[12:20] Mito
Get back here, you two!
[12:22] Mito
Hold it right there!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[12:29] Hime & Hina
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[12:38] Shiro
Oh, it's Hinata-chan! Welcome!
[12:41] Kaede
I am so fed up!
[12:44] Kaede
Can I get some trivia about trips, please?
SIGN Trivia, go!
[12:53] Shiro
You know, trips can also
be a type of internet lingo.
[12:56] Shiro
There's the famous message board, 2channel,
[13:00] Shiro
where all the posts are anonymous by default,
[13:03] Shiro
so that people can write whatever they
want without worrying about prying eyes.
[13:06] Shiro
But sometimes if you're making a string
of posts, you don't want to give a name,
[13:11] Shiro
but you want people to know it's the same
person responsible for previous posts!
[13:16] Shiro
You get what I mean, right, Hinata-chan?
[13:18] Shiro
For times like that,
[13:19] Shiro
you can get a string of random characters
that will indicate who made the post!
[13:25] Shiro
It's called a tripcode or "trip"!
[13:29] Shiro
By the way, 2channel has now
changed its name to 5channel.
[13:36] Hinata
Wow, really?
[13:39] Hinata
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-chan!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[13:48] Mito
I wonder who's here this week?
[13:55] Elu
Oh, Mito-san, I've been waiting!
[13:58] Mito
Huh? And you are?
[13:59] Elu
I-it's me, Elu!
[14:00] Mito
Right.
[14:01] Mito
Okay, Elu-san, let's get started on the
ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
[14:04] Mito
Here is today's especially ultimate choice!
[14:08] Mito
Let's say you can only respond
to questions one way from now on.
[14:10] Mito
Which would you prefer?
[14:12] Mito
A) Yes. B) No.
[14:14] Elu
So you either become a yes man for life,
or someone who always says no.
[14:17] Elu
That is pretty ultimate.
[14:18] Mito
Which do you pick?
[14:19] Elu
I'd go with "yes."
[14:20] Mito
But why?
[14:21] Elu
I mean, I'd rather be the kind of
person who says "yes" than "no."
[14:25] Elu
Doesn't that just give a more
positive impression overall?
[14:26] Mito
It does seem more friendly, indeed.
[14:28] Elu
Right?
[14:29] Elu
I'm kind of self-conscious
about that sort of thing.
[14:31] Mito
Oh, Elu-chan, would you carry my bags?
[14:33] Elu
Oh, sure.
[14:34] Mito
And can I break your finger?
[14:36] Elu
Uh... okay.
[14:38] Mito
You just agreed, so I'm gonna do it, okay?
[14:40] Elu
Oh boy, that's... maybe I
should change my answer.
[14:40] Mito
Just you wait.
[14:43] Mito
Really?
[14:44] Elu
But y'know, there's something kind of
standoffish about only ever saying no.
[14:47] Mito
Ah, but you see, I've got
a plan to counteract that.
[14:50] Elu
What, really?
[14:51] Elu
Okay, I'll ask some questions.
[14:52] Mito
Okay.
[14:53] Elu
Mito-Mito-chan, you want to
treat me to sushi today?
[14:57] Mito
Nope.
[14:58] Mito
But I'm kind of hungry, so...
[15:01] Mito
I guess I could go, maybe.
[15:06] Elu
Well, you and I are good friends, right?
[15:09] Mito
Nope.
[15:11] Mito
But I've got an opening in my friend roster.
[15:14] Mito
So I guess I could fit you in, maybe...
[15:17] Elu
So the trick is to become a tsundere.
[15:18] Mito
Exactly, all you need to do is act tsundere.
[15:20] Elu
That's actually pretty slick.
[15:21] Mito
And time's up!
[15:23] Mito
It was fuzzy for a moment,
but the correct answer is "no"!
[15:27] Elu
Yeah, I'm actually convinced.
[15:29] Mito
That's right!
[15:30] Mito
Tsundere is on the verge of passing from the
lexicon, so let's prop it up aggressively!
[15:37] Kerin
Virtual-san is looking.
[15:39] Kerin
Let's blow it up!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[15:42] Unity
Unity-chan!
[15:45] Unity
Here they come!
[15:48] Unity
There!
[15:50] Unity
Take that!
[15:51] Unity
Piece of cake!
[15:56] Unity
There you are! This time,
I'm getting that rare drop!
[16:00] Unity
Mega magic!
[16:02] Unity
Ultimate Croquette Power Kick!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
SIGN Pen Name: Yosshuchan
SIGN We want to see your characters!
Check out the Virtualsan - Looking
official website for details!
[16:14] Yossuh
Hello there. So, the other
day I was at the pub,
[16:17] Yossuh
and these people were making a ton of noise,
[16:18] Yossuh
and I couldn't take it anymore,
[16:20] Yossuh
so I let them have it!
[16:21] Yossuh
Like, "Do you want some of these edamame?"
[16:22] Yossuh
What did you think I meant
by letting them have it?
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer.
[16:30] Everybody
Harutrash Sword!
[16:32] Everybody
We're getting blown away!
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[16:38] Hina
Hey, what are we doing
in a big city like this?
[16:42] Hime
It's been a few years since Kerin disappeared,
[16:44] Hime
but I got a tip that he's living in this city.
[16:47] Hina
The dark elf who lives in the
woods of Gunma... in the city?
[16:50] Hime
Yep, yep! I know how it sounds.
[16:52] Hime
I think he should be around here, somewhere.
[16:56] Hina
Kerin!
[16:57] Hime
Yo! How you been?
[16:59] Kerin
Who are you people?
[17:01] Hime
You forgot about us?!
[17:03] Hime
We used to shoot missiles and
magic around, trying to kill each other!
[17:08] Hina
That's right!
[17:10] Hina
You always got the short end of the stick,
[17:12] Hina
but your ballistics and
Himehina were pretty close!
[17:15] Hime
Yep.
[17:15] Kerin
Oh, you two...
[17:17] Kerin
I don't even feel like
starting anything anymore.
[17:21] Hime
You reek of booze!
[17:22] Hina
Kerin, what happened to you?
[17:24] Kerin
Oh, me?
[17:26] Kerin
I wanted to polish myself...
[17:28] Kerin
for when I would meet Elu-san again,
so I came to the city.
[17:32] Kerin
And it beat me.
[17:34] Hina
But how?
[17:37] Hina
What were you doing here?
[17:39] Kerin
I was a small-time host.
[17:41] Kerin
I figured if I became number one,
then Elu-san might notice me.
[17:45] Kerin
So I brushed myself off, and worked hard.
[17:48] Kerin
But I was never able to beat that horse guy.
SIGN Virtual
[17:52] Kerin
People would always request him.
[17:55] Kerin
Kept saying he was cute,
trying to confess to the sister...
[17:58] Hime
So you couldn't win, quit being a host,
and became a drunk.
[18:03] Hime
That's not the Kerin I know!
I'm so disappointed in you!
[18:06] Hime
What happened to all your energy?!
[18:08] Hime
Shoot a few missiles at us or something!
[18:12] Kerin
You keep talking...
[18:14] Kerin
Did you really think I didn't
do anything else in this city?
[18:18] Kerin
Fine, then... I'll show you!
[18:20] Kerin
Too late to change your mind!
[18:22] Hina
Th-This might be bad...
[18:24] Hina
I can sense an intense night energy!
[18:26] Kerin
Super Mega Liquor Magic!
[18:29] Kerin
Buchichamp de'Oom!
SIGN Buchichamp de'Oom
[18:30] Kerin
Time to drink the night away!
[18:33] Hina
That's total host magic!
[18:35] Hina
If that thing hits us we're going
to get drunk and have hangovers!
[18:39] Hina
We're underage, though! This is a bad matchup!
[18:42] Hina
We need to deflect it, Hime!
[18:43] Hime
Okay! Ready, and...
[18:45] Hime
Ukon Shield!
SIGN Ukon
SIGN Shield
[18:50] Mito
The latest and greatest...
[18:52] Kerin
What is this?!
[18:54] Hime
It... It can't be...
[18:55] Hina
That looks like...
SIGN Sister!
[19:07] Uma
Please! I need to talk to you today, Sister.
[19:10] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[19:12] Sora
Listen, Sister!
[19:12] Uma
Well the thing is—
[19:19] Sister
What is it?
[19:20] Sora
People from Kansai always say
"but I dunno" after everything, right?
[19:23] Sister
Some certainly do.
[19:25] Sora
So do they know? Or not? Which is it?!
[19:28] Sister
What makes you ask that, Sora-san?
[19:30] Sora
I asked a friend of mine
from Kansai questions.
[19:32] Sora
I got a really serious answer,
and at first I was impressed.
[19:35] Sora
But then at the end there
was a "but I dunno"! So I told her!
[19:40] Sora
"Make up yer friggin' mind!"
[19:42] Sister
Oh my, now you've got the accent, too.
[19:45] Sister
But Sora-san, they're not trying to
avoid responsibility by saying that.
[19:49] Sora
Really?
[19:50] Sister
They're trying to impart to you that
it's only their personal opinion,
[19:52] Sister
and that they have no
hard basis for their claims,
[19:55] Sister
so that you should probably
look into the issue more seriously.
[19:57] Sora
I get it!
[19:58] Sora
I better apologize to my
friend I snapped at, then!
[20:03] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[20:05] Uma
"But I dunno" is a type of politeness!
SIGN Sister!
[20:11] Sister
God bless you.
[20:14] Sister
Virtual-san is looking.
[20:17] Hina
Okay, we've got a letter here, everybody!
[20:20] Hina
It's from someone with
the pen name "Hello, everyone!"
[20:23] Everyone
Thanks for writing!
[20:26] Hina
"Lately, I've fallen down a VTuber hole!"
[20:29] Hina
"Are there any newer VTubers you would
recommend to a neophyte like me?"
[20:34] Hina
It says!
[20:35] Akari
Oh, oh, me!
[20:36] Akari
Well, do you guys know...
[20:39] Akari
There's this one called "Mirai Akari."
[20:41] Shiro
Never heard of him.
[20:41] Mito
Doesn't ring a bell.
SIGN This is going to run long, so we'll have the
six of them each recommend a VTuber
[20:48] Akari
I'd say Pinky Pop Hepburn-chan!
SIGN Mirai Akari's
Recommended VTuber
Pinky Pop
Hepburn
SIGN Big Boobs (?)
SIGN Cyber Girl Siro's
Recommended VTuber
Unity-chan
[20:53] Shiro
I'd say Unity-chan!
[20:58] Hime
I want to introduce
people to Ginga Alice-chan!
SIGN Tanaka Hime's
Recommended VTuber
Ginga Alice
SIGN Invading Alien
SIGN Suzuki Hina's
Recommended VTuber
Tomari Mari
[21:04] Hina
I'm actually really into a guy who reincarnated
as Tomari Mari-chan, at the moment.
SIGN A Reincarnated Guy
[21:08] Hinata
Do you guys know Kafu-chan?
SIGN Nekomiya Hinata's
Recommended VTuber
Kafu
SIGN Studying for Exams!
[21:11] Everbody
Oh, yeah!
[21:13] Mito
I recommend Marie Android.
SIGN Tsukino Mito's
Recommended VTuber
Marie Android
SIGN Her Eyes Are Wide Open
[21:16] Mito
Her eyes are always really wide open.
[21:19] Hina
Well, pen name "Hello, everybody!"
[21:20] Hina
I hope you take a look at the
VTubers we recommended today
[21:24] Hina
and fall down a whole bunch of new holes!
[21:27] Hina
And so, until next week,
[21:29] Hina
Virtual-san is looking!
[23:09] Omega Sisters
Hey, hey, hey there! Everybody feeling Omega?!
SIGN Omega Sisters
[23:12] Rei
I'm Omega Rei!
[23:12] Rio
And I'm Omega Rio!
[23:13] Rei
We're here to do the next episode preview
for the finale of Virtual-san - Looking.
[23:19] Rio
Wow, amazing.
[23:20] Rei
Next time is the finale!
The last episode, Rio.
[23:22] Rio
The last one!
[23:24] Rio
But they didn't tell us what happens,
so we can't tell you anything!
[23:27] Rei
Yeah.
[23:27] Rio
Right?
[23:28] Rei
Y'know, this title reminds me of something.
[23:30] Rio
You're not supposed to point out the parodies!
[23:32] Rei
Ah, it'll be fine.
[23:33] Rio
Yeah, I think so. Sure.
[23:34] Both
Next time is
"The Disappearance of Virtual-san."
SIGN Next Time
"The Disappearance of Virtual-san"
[23:36] Both
And Virtual-san will be
looking next week, too!
E12 - The Disappearance of Virtual-san
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Peanut
Today's the final episode!
[00:03] Uma
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Anything you wanna say in the end?
[00:05] Peanut
Thanks for the last three months!
[00:07] Uma
There's another episode
on the Blu-rays, too!
[00:09] Peanut
You're gonna advertise now?!
You horsey bastard!
SIGN Virtual Real
Was Looking
Final Episode
[00:15] Mito
He's the one who will determine whether
or not this world can change.
[00:25] Hinata
Bye-bye.
[00:31] Hina
That new world...
[00:33] Hime
I wish we could've seen it.
[00:38] Shiro
Thank you for trying so hard.
[00:42] Mito
We will never forget you.
[00:51] Akari
But I'm sure that...
[00:58] All
You can do it!
[01:05] Giant Mob
What the—?!
[01:14] Robo
What is this? What's going on?
[01:17] Hime
All right!
[01:18] Hinata
Good work!
[01:20] Hina
I knew you could pull it off!
[01:22] Akari
All right, let's do this!
[01:24] Mito
Please, listen to this!
[01:25] Shiro
It's our...
[01:26] Shiro
Virtual Real song!
[03:17] Hikari
Virtual-san is looking!
[03:22] Call
Virtual Grandmother!
[03:26] Granny
Idaten bashiri.
SIGN Grandma
SIGN Today's Phrase
Idaten Bashiri
[03:28] Granny
That's the phrase.
[03:31] Granny
It has a simple meaning, which
is to run a great distance.
[03:35] Granny
But there are limits to what
human limbs can manage.
[03:38] Granny
And as a result, humanity came
across the idea of transportation.
[03:43] Granny
And among them all, the Shinkansen,
SIGN Grandma
[03:47] Granny
which started operating in 1964,
might be the most amazing.
[03:51] Granny
Then you have automobiles, which grew into
a type of vehicle that anyone can use,
[03:55] Granny
and the completion of the
high-speed roadways in 1965.
[04:00] Granny
As for me, I got my license
right away when I turned 20.
[04:04] Granny
And I just couldn't get enough of driving!
[04:07] Granny
Back then, the toll was 100 yen,
regardless of where you used it.
[04:10] Granny
I used to drive down the highway
a lot by myself in those days.
[04:14] Granny
I just enjoyed the act of driving.
[04:18] Granny
I can still move, too! Look at this!
Impressive, isn't it?
[04:22] Granny
I can even drive while doing backflips.
[04:25] Granny
Because I'm virtual, you see,
I can do anything!
[04:31] Granny
Now this is idaten bashiri!
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[04:40] Subaru
I'm Subaru Ingram, an incubus.
SIGN Pen Name: Subaru Ingram
SIGN Everyone's
Virtual-san
[04:45] Subaru
I might look like a girl,
[04:48] Subaru
but I really am a boy!
[04:56] Shiro
Virtual-san is looking.
[05:00] Hinata
Hey, Virtual-san is looking.
[05:06] Gori
Aoi-san, here we have a button.
SIGN 100 Million
[05:09] Aoi
Right.
[05:10] Gori
And if you press it,
you'll get a hundred million yen.
SIGN 100 Million
[05:13] Aoi
Right.
[05:13] Gori
But in exchange,
Fuji Aoi Park will be destroyed.
SIGN 100 Million
SIGN 100 Million
[05:17] Aoi
Okay.
[05:18] Gori
Would you press that button? Or...
SIGN 100 Million
SIGN 100 Million
SIGN 100 Million
SIGN 100 Million
SIGN 100 Million
[05:25] Gori
Wait, but... destruction?
SIGN 100 Million
SIGN 100 Million
[05:28] Aoi
Okay!
[05:30] Aoi
That oughta be good for a billion, I think.
[05:31] Gori
I suppose so...
SIGN 100 Million
[05:32] Aoi
Okay, time to grab something tasty to eat!
[05:35] Aoi
The bananas are on me!
SIGN 100 Million
[05:36] Gori
Only bananas?
[05:37] Aoi
Fuji Aoi!
SIGN Fuji Aoi Park
[05:39] Gori
Hello.
[05:42] Hinata
Big trouble, big trouble!
[05:44] Hinata
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[05:47] Hinata
Real big trouble, Akari-chan!
[05:55] Akari
Hinata! So it's your turn. What's up?
[06:00] Hinata
Akari-chan, there's big trouble!
[06:03] Akari
And what's that?
[06:05] Hinata
Someone with the pen name
"Rocky-kun" is in trouble.
[06:07] Hinata
Here, check it out.
[06:09] Akari
Okay. Let's see, "Hello Akari-san."
[06:11] Hinata
Hello.
[06:12] Akari
H'lo!
[06:13] Akari
"I have a YouTube channel, but I don't
stand out, and it's really difficult."
SIGN [Advice] Here me out
[06:18] Akari
"How can I develop the kind of
quirk that would make it
[06:21] Akari
so that anyone would remember
me after a single video?"
[06:23] Hinata
I get how he feels.
SIGN Problem: How can I
be memorable?
[06:25] Akari
Y'know, even we had trouble with this.
[06:27] Hinata
Everyone worries about it.
[06:31] Akari
What to do...?
[06:33] Hinata
Huh? Mirai-san?
[06:35] Hinata
Mirai-san!
SIGN Hikari
SIGN Yami
[06:38] Yami
You just need to be provocative!
[06:41] Hikari
Like drinking a whole cola at once?
[06:44] Yami
How the hell does that provoke anyone?!
[06:46] Yami
You need something with sex and violence,
or no one will care!
[06:50] Hikari
Oh, no!
[06:51] Hikari
If you do that, you're bound to get
complaints from all over the place!
[06:56] Yami
The squeaky wheel gets the grease!
[06:58] Yami
That's part of standing out.
[07:01] Hikari
That might be true, but...
[07:03] Hikari
I'm sorry, Akari, you have to handle this!
[07:08] Hinata
Hello! Mirai-san?
[07:11] Akari
Oh, sorry about that.
[07:13] Akari
I almost fell asleep.
[07:15] Hinata
Good morning, then!
[07:16] Akari
Morning!
[07:18] Akari
Pen name Rocky-kun! Here's the bottom line!
[07:23] Hinata
Is this finally it? Her bottom... line?
[07:27] Akari
You need to be from the future!
[07:30] Akari
I mean, there's no one from
the future who's a YouTuber!
[07:33] Akari
Someone like that would know
the winning lotto numbers
[07:35] Akari
and which horses would win their races!
[07:38] Akari
That's one heck of a gimmick!
[07:40] Hinata
Okay, okay, okay.
[07:42] Akari
"Something shocking will happen
to the world in a year..."
[07:45] Akari
"Oh, but if I say any more,
it'll alter the timeline!"
[07:48] Akari
You say stuff like that and
your views will blow up!
[07:52] Hinata
I can see why, but y'know,
[07:55] Hinata
I think it'd be impossible to get away
with claiming to be from the future.
[07:58] Akari
Impossible, she says! You never know!
[08:02] Akari
In another few decades,
there might be time machines!
[08:05] Hinata
Y-You've got a point! That might happen!
[08:07] Akari
Which is why if Rocky-kun
waits until he's a grandpa,
[08:11] Akari
I'm sure he'll be able to make his
debut as the YouTuber from future!
[08:14] Hinata
But when it actually gets to be that era,
[08:17] Hinata
everyone else might hop into time machines
to become YouTubers from the future, too.
[08:25] Akari
When that happens, uh...
[08:29] Akari
He can dye his hair blond!
[08:30] Hinata
H-How unique!
[08:32] Akari
So focus on keeping your hair until the
time machine is ready in the meantime!
[08:37] Hinata
I see!
[08:44] Hinata
A blond YouTuber from the future!
SIGN Big Trouble!
Akari-chan
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[09:03] Hinata
This is bad.
[09:06] Hinata
I can see a man at the end of this road.
[09:08] Hinata
And in front of him is a little girl.
[09:10] Hinata
If he's some kind of old creep...
[09:13] Hinata
Should I toss a grenade before
that girl gets traumatized?
[09:16] Hinata
No, she could get caught in the blast.
[09:19] Hinata
And a SMG wouldn't be accurate
at this distance.
[09:23] Hinata
I think I'd better pop
smoke to conceal that guy,
[09:26] Hinata
and then have the girl
evacuate in the meantime.
[09:33] Girl
Papa!
[09:35] Hinata
I almost slaughtered her old man!
SIGN Hinata-chan Heads to
School
[09:42] Hina
Yo, yo, yo! Virtual-san is looking!
Yo, yo, yo!
SIGN Trivia
Diner
[09:51] Shiro
Oh, it's Virtual-san... Welcome!
[09:55] Uma
I am so fed up!
[09:58] Uma
Can I get some trivia about horses, please?
SIGN Trivia, go!
[10:05] Shiro
Horses...
[10:06] Shiro
Y'know, the part of horses that
seems like it would be knee
[10:09] Shiro
is actually more comparable
to the human wrist,
[10:11] Shiro
which means what looks like a shin is really
a middle finger pointing down all the time.
[10:15] Shiro
And their hooves are sort of like something
[10:18] Shiro
that evolved out of their middle fingernail.
[10:21] Shiro
Horses also have incredible eyes.
[10:25] Shiro
It's said that humans have a
200 degree range of vision,
[10:28] Shiro
but horses can see a range up to 350 degrees!
[10:32] Shiro
If you try to play, "Guess who?"
with them, they'll see you coming!
[10:36] Shiro
By the way, the saying
"has blinders on" comes from horses
[10:39] Shiro
who were only allowed to see
what was in front of them,
[10:44] Shiro
and means that you're focused on a single
thing, to the exclusion of everything else.
[10:50] Shiro
I wish there was a horse I knew who
could work like he had blinders on.
[10:58] Virtual
Wow, really?
[11:01] Virtual
Your trivia is always so handy, Siro-chan!
[11:04] Shiro
Stop flipping me off.
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[11:09] Mito
I sent her that picture of protein,
but will she actually show up?
SIGN Shizurin appeared!
[11:16] Rin
Mito-san!
[11:18] Rin
Is it true there are ripped gentlemen
enthusiastically enjoying protein here?!
[11:22] Mito
Shizurin-senpai, you're dumber than I thought.
[11:24] Mito
All we have here is the protein.
[11:26] Mito
God damn!
[11:29] Mito
Now then, Shizurin-senpai, it's time for
our ultimate "Would you rather" committee.
[11:33] Rin
Again?
[11:35] Mito
Here's our subject for today!
[11:37] Mito
If you had to pick, which would you prefer?
[11:39] Mito
A) Spend an entire day hunched over,
[11:41] Mito
B) Spend an entire day
standing on your toes.
[11:42] ---
Standing on my toes...
[11:44] ---
Yes.
[11:44] Rin
I'd rather not do either,
but I guess I'd pick tiptoes.
[11:49] Mito
Oh, I was thinking of saying that, too.
[11:51] Rin
That's fine, isn't it? We can match, then.
[11:52] Mito
No, no, the segment would end in that case!
[11:53] Rin
Nice and tidy!
[11:54] Mito
Let's try it to see for sure.
[11:56] Mito
I'll stand on my tiptoes,
[11:58] Mito
and Shizurin-senpai will hunch over,
and we'll converse about something!
[12:00] Rin
That's unfair. Totally unfair, but...
[12:02] Mito
This is really killing my calves, though.
[12:05] Rin
But imagine having to spend
a whole day like this.
[12:07] Mito
Good point.
[12:09] Rin
Let's trade! I'll stand on my tip toes.
[12:11] Mito
No, no, wouldn't that mean
I'd have to hunch over?
[12:13] Rin
Right, exactly.
[12:14] Mito
I'm afraid that I can't,
for religious reasons.
[12:16] Rin
What religion is that?!
[12:18] Rin
If you're a real entertainer,
you need to try it out!
[12:22] Mito
Don't blame me if this goes badly, then.
[12:23] Rin
Stoop! Stoop!
[12:26] Rin
You know what, never mind! Never mind!
[12:27] Mito
I figured as much! Now, you see.
[12:29] Rin
I had to cover that up.
[12:31] Mito
When I hunch over, it's really
quite a sight, let me tell you!
[12:34] Rin
That was scary.
[12:35] Mito
Oh, it's already 3 PM!
[12:37] Mito
That means our result is...
[12:39] Mito
B, spending all day on your tiptoes!
[12:42] Rin
Aw, no, come on, I really
don't want to do that, either!
[12:46] Mito
If you want to be a real VTuber,
[12:47] Mito
you need to know what you
are and aren't capable of!
SIGN It's 3 PM,
Class President.
[12:54] Hime
Virtual-san is looking!
SIGN Unity-chan Wants to
Roll Around
[13:04] Unity
I think I burned through five curry
croquettes' worth of calories!
[13:07] Unity
But I know you've got
them ready, don't you?!
[13:10] Unity
Come on, curry croquettes!
[13:14] Unity
There's so many!
[13:19] Unity
Lots and lots!
[13:24] Unity
Huh? A dream ending?
SIGN Previously on Kerin Slayer.
SIGN Kerin Slayer.
[13:40] Kerin
Wh-Who are you supposed to be?!
[13:42] Mito
Where's that bubbly at?
[13:43] Hina
Mito-chan?!
[13:44] Mito
Tanaka, Hina, I've come to rescue you two!
[13:47] Hime
Wh-Wh-What's going on here, Mitonator?!
[13:50] Mito
If the two of you are hit
with Buchichamp de'Oom,
[13:52] Mito
you'll develop an addiction
to hosts and go bankrupt.
[13:54] Mito
That's the kind of future that awaits.
[13:55] Hina
What the heck? That's scary.
[13:57] Mito
I've come from the future to
prevent that from happening.
[14:00] Hime & Hina
M-Mitonator-sama!
[14:03] Kerin
Cut all the jibber-jabber!
[14:05] Kerin
You wasted all my Chandon.
[14:07] Mito
Silence!
[14:08] Mito
The real problem here is that you've
become a washed-up drunkard!
[14:12] Kerin
Y'know, booze... the thing with booze!
[14:15] Kerin
It's the only friend I have!
[14:17] Kerin
I'm gonna drink and drink
until it drinks me up!
SIGN Buchichamp de'Oom
[14:21] Mito
What kind of vulgar sorcery is this?!
[14:23] Hina
Mito-chan, get clear!
[14:24] Mito
No, I can deal with this with my own magic!
[14:28] Mito
Selphshield!
[14:30] Hime
That's the most advanced type
of barrier magic, Selphshield!
[14:34] Mitoshield
The refined class prez!
[14:36] Kerin
Impossible! My Chandon!
[14:38] Kerin
All the work I've done since
coming to the city...
[14:41] Kerin
If it's come to this...
I'll use Buchitema.
[14:43] Hina
Wait, Kerin!
[14:44] Hina
She knows Elu-san, y'know!
[14:46] Kerin
Elu...san?!
[14:48] Mito
Oh, you want to see Elu-san?
[14:50] Kerin
I can... see her?
[14:52] Mito
I see. This might actually be good medicine
to cure your sorry state of affairs.
[14:56] Mito
Tanaka, Hina-san, could the two
of you lend me your strength?
[14:59] Mito
We'll call Elu-san here!
[15:01] Hime
We're going to use that
ultimate spell, right!
[15:03] Hina
Okay! You got it!
[15:05] Mito
To our elf, who art in Heaven.
[15:07] Mito
By your blessing, let our foolish comrade
who has fallen to evil be saved.
[15:12] Hime & Hina
Super Ultimate Mega Summoning,
Elu-Elu Essaim!
[15:16] Hime & Hina
Hao!
[15:22] Elu
Chomp, chomp, chomp...
[15:23] Elu
I was eating dinner.
[15:25] Elu
Hi everybody, Elu here!
[15:28] Hime
Did we interrupt a meal?
[15:30] Kerin
Elu-san!
[15:31] Kerin
So big!
[15:32] Kerin
A giant Elu-san!
[15:34] Mito
Elu-san, sorry to trouble
you during your dinner,
[15:36] Mito
but could you purify this fellow?
[15:38] Elu
Well, my food's gonna get cold!
[15:41] Elu
But leave it to Elu!
[15:43] Hina
She's so mellow!
[15:44] Kerin
P-Purify?! Don't be ridiculous!
[15:47] Kerin
I've become a part of this city.
My heart's been stained black.
[15:50] Elu
Kerin-san! I'm gonna blow you away!
[15:54] Elu
Ultimate purifying magic, Mesareru!
[16:00] Kerin
A warm light...
[16:01] Elu
It's okay now. I'm sure you're tired.
[16:04] Elu
You tried your best!
[16:06] Elu
Munch, munch, munch...
[16:07] Mito
Elu-san, please focus on the purification!
[16:12] Elu
Anyway, hurry up and be purified!
[16:14] Kerin
Elu-san—!
[16:20] Kerin
No! Not there—!
[16:24] Hina
Kerin vanished!
[16:25] Elu
I sent him to Heaven!
[16:27] Elu
Now if you don't mind,
I'm getting back to dinner!
[16:30] Elu
Bye-bye!
[16:31] Mito
That about does it, I'd say.
[16:33] Hina
Gotta say, the city can be a scary place.
[16:35] Mito
Indeed.
[16:36] Mito
But since we're all here, Tanaka, Hina-san,
[16:40] Mito
why don't we try one of
those champagne towers?
[16:42] Hime
Sounds good!
[16:44] Hime
I wanna stack the glasses!
[16:46] Hina
Mito-chan, you've got a chant, right?
[16:48] Mito
You wanna hear it? Do you?
You ready? Should I?
[16:49] Mito
Ready, set, go!
[16:52] Mito
Even in a world that's purely virtual!
[16:55] Mito
Your love is real!
[16:57] Mito
And right now, right here, we'll prove it!
[16:59] Mito
Real money doesn't lie! One order
of Buchichamp de'Oom, coming up!
[17:03] Hime & Hina
Thank you very much!
[17:07] Kerin
Elu-san, I'm on my way!
SIGN Kerin Slayer
SIGN The End
SIGN Sister!
[17:18] Uma
Sister, please hear me out.
[17:20] Sister
What is it, dear horse?
[17:22] Uma
Well, you see...
[17:25] Uma
Is this happening? I can do it!
[17:27] Uma
Please, listen, sister!
[17:28] Sister
What is it?
[17:30] Uma
I... I...
[17:32] Uma
Huh?
[17:33] Sister
What's the matter?
[17:35] Uma
After being knocked aside 11 times,
I've forgotten my confession.
[17:39] Sister
Oh, dear.
[17:40] Sora
I'm gonna blow him away!
[17:42] Uma
My inability to confess when the time is
right is almost like my own coughbtl—
[17:52] Sora
Listen, sister!
[17:53] Sister
What is it?
[17:54] Sora
I need some advice on something.
[17:56] Sister
How can I help?
[17:58] Sora
I can't think of anything else to confess!
[18:00] Uma
Then what are you doing here?!
[18:01] Sister
Is that it?
[18:03] Sister
If nothing weighs upon your conscience,
that is a good thing.
[18:07] Sora
But if I've got nothing to confess,
I can't come and see you.
[18:11] Sister
I am always here, so you can
come and see me when you like.
[18:15] Sora
Thank you, sister!
[18:18] Sister
May you be virtually blessed.
[18:20] Uma
I remember! I remembered
my confession! Sister—!
SIGN Sister!
[18:29] Mito
Virtual-san is looking.
[18:41] Akari
Himehina! Whatcha doing?
[18:43] Hime
Everyone! Hao!
[18:45] Akari
Hello!
[18:46] Shiro
Sup, supo!
[18:46] Hinata
Hi!
[18:46] Mito
Good day.
[18:48] Hina
Since the weather's nice,
we were doing dance practice.
[18:51] Mito
I see. What an energetic finale it'll be!
[18:53] Hinata
Already the last episode, huh?
It's been fun.
[18:57] Shiro
I know, we should thank everyone
who stuck around to the end!
[19:02] Everyone
Good idea!
[19:03] Mito
Well said, Siro-san!
[19:08] Akari
To everybody who watched these three months!
[19:11] Akari
Thank you very much!
[19:13] Shiro
We're really grateful for all the
messages of support we received!
[19:17] Hime
It'd be great if even more Virtual-sans
could be in anime in the future!
[19:22] Hina
You can look forward to seeing the evolution
of virtual anime from here on out!
[19:26] Hinata
And this is farewell until we meet again.
[19:30] Mito
And this message goes out to you,
who might be lonely!
[19:32] Mito
Here we go.
[19:33] Mito
It's okay!
[21:16] Akari
Here we go!
[21:17] Akari
"The Walking Free Directory!"
[21:19] Hina
Can I bring you home with me tonight?
[21:22] Shiro
Okey-dokey!
[21:23] Shiro
Sharpening a knife...
[21:24] Hina
Who you supposed to be?
[21:26] Hina
Winter, for you, hot water for stew!
[21:28] Hinata
I wouldn't say that!
[21:30] Mito
The latest and greatest...
[21:32] Mito
Transcendentally—
[22:58] Akari
Ready, and...
[22:59] Akari
Virtual-san is looking!