E6 - The Lid on This Hellish Cauldron Has Come Off

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Azuma
    Okay, what is this?
    Who are you supposed to be?
[00:06] Eita
    Kuro-san... Has he come to save me?
[00:10] Azuma
    Hey, Noheji. Who do you think this is?
[00:13] Azuma
    ...is how I make a feint before one of these!
[00:16] Azuma
    Huh? He didn't even budge.
[00:21] Noheji
    That's a sanchin stance...
[00:23] Noheji
    This dude must do karate.
[00:26] Noheji
    Might wanna watch yourself, Azuma.
[00:30] Azuma
    Hey! Don't hide in there. Come on out.
[00:46] Noheji
    You want some of this?!
[00:48] Eita
    A tactical baton?
    Were they gonna use that on me?!
[00:52] Eita
    But... I have my assassin that I paid to—
[00:57] Eita
    Why is he behind me?!
[00:58] Kuro
    Listen up, Eita.
[01:00] Kuro
    Right hand is rock, left hand is paper.
[01:03] Eita
    Right and left... What?
[01:05] Noheji
    What the hell are you talking about?!
[01:09] Kuro
    Now, relax for me.
[01:15] Noheji
    Wh-What the?!
[01:27] Eita
    Ow!
[01:31] Kuro
    The invisibility's worn off.
    I guess a charge really doesn't last long.
[01:37] Kuro
    You can take it from here.
    Finish them off if you want.
[01:41] Kuro
    You did it, so it's your call.
[01:43] Eita
    I'm not sure what I should do...
[01:46] Kuro
    One thing.
[01:49] Kuro
    Where's the director's office?
[01:52] Eita
    He's usually in the boiler room.
SIGN    Episode 6: "The Lid on This Hellish Cauldron Has Come Off"
[03:38] Kuro
    This must be it.
[03:49] Director
    I guess I'm impressed.
[03:52] Director
    Heading straight into
    enemy territory like this...
[03:56] Director
    The invisibility you ninja love
    so much won't work on me.
[04:05] Director
    I didn't think you'd come here quite
    so soon, Kumogakure Kuro-kun.
[04:11] Kuro
    I can come back later, then.
[04:15] Director
    Come on, why don't you relax
    and have a cup of tea?!
[04:32] Director
    Impressive.
[04:34] Director
    To blow that dart with such precise timing...
[04:37] Director
    And the latest NIN armor.
    It lives up to its reputation.
[04:42] Director
    The blade resistance has improved
    almost as much as the invisibility.
[04:47] Director
    With an older model, your arm
    would be on the ground right now.
[04:50] Kuro
    Give up now.
    Escape has already targeted you.
[04:55] Kuro
    Attack again and your arm will evaporate.
[05:01] Director
    It's an honor to be in the cross hairs
    of NIN's ultimate weapon, Escape.
[05:06] Director
    On the roof before, it was
    Hachiya-kun's laser pointer...
[05:11] Director
    But I'd be thrilled if the
    real deal was aimed at me.
[05:15] Kuro
    Care to find out?
[05:17] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Ew, you can see their insides...
[05:19] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Weird how fast you get used to it, though.
[05:22] (Flashback) Kawado
    I know, right?
[05:23] (Flashback) Kawado
    If you watch it all the time,
    it stops being stimulating enough.
[05:28] (Flashback) Kuro
    Pardon me.
[05:30] (Flashback) Kato
    Sit.
[05:31] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sir.
[05:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    I was wondering...
[05:35] (Flashback) Kato
    What is it?
[05:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    The popular show from the
    Ninja Broadcast Company,
[05:39] (Flashback) Kuro
    Me and Old Dudes, was airing on regular TV.
[05:45] (Flashback) Kato
    Normally, the signal is scrambled
    so that civilian TVs can't pick it up.
[05:51] (Flashback) Kato
    But there's a selection of households
    that can view it normally.
[05:55] (Flashback) Kuro
    Is it part of the support offered
    to victims of the Ninja Disaster?
[05:58] (Flashback) Kato
    There are times when the aims of shinobi
    and the government don't align.
[06:03] (Flashback) Kato
    Should it come to that, our last bastion
[06:05] (Flashback) Kato
    will be the support we
    have among the citizenry.
[06:08] (Flashback) Kato
    One of our jobs as shinobi is to see
    that public resentment doesn't fall on us.
[06:13] (Flashback) Kuro
    "What the people don't know won't hurt them."
[06:18] (Flashback) Kato
    I didn't bring you in for chitchat.
[06:21] (Flashback) Kato
    Command has decided to
    provide you additional gear
[06:23] (Flashback) Kato
    for your infiltration of Kodan High School.
[06:25] (Flashback) Kuro
    The mission's danger rating
    has increased, then?
[06:29] (Flashback) Kato
    Choose whatever you like.
[06:31] (Flashback) Kato
    This is a drone shuriken.
[06:33] (Flashback) Kato
    It's the latest model, and automatically
    follows a target until it connects.
[06:39] (Flashback) Kato
    There's also a folding handgun.
    The foreigner we took in the other day—
[06:45] (Flashback) Kuro
    Then...
[06:47] (Flashback) Kuro
    Can I have what's in the boxes?
[06:52] (Flashback) Kato
    These are mine.
[06:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sorry...
[06:55] (Flashback) Kato
    What else?
[06:58] (Flashback) Kuro
    Is that a weapon, too?
[07:02] (Flashback) Kato
    It's an Italian self-driving motorcycle
    with onboard AI, Teo.
[07:08] (Flashback) Kato
    Hey, Teo. Wake up.
[07:11] (Flashback) Kato
    I said wake up!
[07:15] Teo
    Huh? Uh, right!
[07:18] Teo
    What's up?
[07:19] (Flashback) Kato
    Looks like you've finally got a partner.
[07:21] Teo
    Oh, shit! For real?!
[07:23] (Flashback) Kuro
    So is it, like... remote-controlled, or...
[07:27] Teo
    No, man! I'm talking to you
    of my own free will.
[07:30] Teo
    And come on, seriously? That's not a girl!
[07:34] (Flashback) Teo
    Sorry, buddy, but only chicks
    are allowed to straddle me.
[07:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'll take him.
[07:38] Teo
    Come on! Listen when I talk to you!
[07:42] (Flashback) Kato
    The plan was to scrap him
    due to difficulty of use.
[07:45] Teo
    Wait, seriously?!
[07:47] (Flashback) Kato
    Pipe down.
[07:48] (Flashback) Kato
    What else?
[07:51] (Flashback) Kuro
    Anything else you're
    comfortable parting with...
[07:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    And the targeting device for Escape.
[07:59] Director
    If they actually authorized
    a lowly genin to use Escape,
[08:04] Director
    then Nerima is going to be set ablaze again,
    like during the 22-2-22 incident.
SIGN    Escape Unit Zero
[08:58] Director
    It seems the lid on this hellish
    cauldron has just come off...
[09:05] Director
    Kuro-kun.
[09:13] Kuro
    Looks like the hoodie has GPS
    and a mic installed, too.
SIGN    Hmph.
SIGN    I didn't think you'd actually receive authorization.
SIGN    It saved my life.
SIGN    You could've been hit.
SIGN    It's not that precise.
[09:42] Nekohira
    I am a cat.
[09:44] Nekohira
    One without a name yet.
[09:47] Nekohira
    Or... I had one?
[09:50] Nekohira
    There was some crass woman on the first
    floor who called me... Shinobu? I think.
[09:57] Nekohira
    Wait... I have awareness that I'm a cat?
[10:02] Nekohira
    Actually, the fact that I know the word
    "awareness" makes me one amazing cat.
[10:08] Nekohira
    Some kinda super cat?
[10:10] Nekohira
    Wait, no, the real issue is the fact that
    I understand Japanese in the first place.
[10:19] Nekohira
    What was I thinking again?
[10:23] Nekohira
    I'm actually kinda hungry.
[10:35] Nekohira
    There she is. She even sleeps seedy.
[10:40] Nekohira
    Defenseless, too.
[10:43] Nekohira
    Okay, rise and shine!
[10:51] Kawado
    That tickles!
[10:53] Kawado
    Oh, Shinobu.
[11:00] Kawado
    You woke me up at the perfect time.
[11:03] Kawado
    Good boy, Shinobu.
SIGN    Me and Old Dudes
[11:06] Takachiho
    All right, you good little old dudes!
    How are you doing?
[11:10] Takachiho
    It's me, Miss Takachiho!
[11:10] Kawado
    This is when the Me and Old Dudes rerun airs.
[11:14] Kawado
    Wanna watch with me?
[11:19] Old Dude
    Ow! Help! Mommy!
[11:23] Nekohira
    Huh... Something about this is familiar.
[11:26] Old Dudes
    What the hell?!
[11:27] Nekohira
    Actually, I think I was there...
[11:28] Old Dudes
    Is this for real?! Or a prank?!
[11:30] Takachiho
    Now then, everyone, let's all quiet down!
[11:34] Takachiho
    Today, we're going to keep playing
    until there's only one of you left.
[11:38] Nekohira
    I fought there, and then... those ninja...
[11:45] Nekohira
    killed me!
[11:51] Nekohira
    But... why am I a cat?
[11:55] Nekohira
    If I remember right...
[12:00] (Flashback) Researcher
    Hello there, son. I take it you're awake?
[12:03] (Flashback) Researcher
    It's quite impressive that
    you managed to survive
[12:06] (Flashback) Researcher
    against our Rainbow Hound
    until the very end.
[12:11] (Flashback) Researcher
    Out of respect for your tenacity,
    we've kept a portion of your brain intact.
[12:18] (Flashback) Researcher
    We've had real trouble with
    mortality rates post-transplant...
[12:22] (Flashback) Researcher
    So we have big hopes for you!
[12:38] Nekohira
    So my brain...
[12:42] Nekohira
    was transplanted into this cat?
[12:49] Kawado
    Huh? Kuro-kun?
[12:51] Kawado
    Aren't you back kinda early?
[12:54] Kuro
    I was sleepy, so I left early.
[12:56] Kawado
    On your first day?!
[12:58] Kawado
    Look, I get how you feel,
    but don't get kicked out, okay?
[13:02] Kuro
    Well, who knows what'll happen?
[13:06] Nekohira
    This guy...
[13:15] Nekohira
    He's the one who killed me!
[13:20] Kawado
    Huh? Shinobu, what's got you so upset?
[13:25] Kawado
    Oh, Kuro-kun, if you're bored,
    why don't we drink in Ono-san's room?
[13:30] Nekohira
    Wait, I could've sworn
    I was thinking something...
[13:40] Kawado
    Kuro-kun?
[13:41] Kuro
    Oh... Sure.
[13:46] Kato
    You've made it home safely,
[13:49] Kato
    Onikobe.
[13:51] Onikobe
    Sir! The new recruit relieved me of duty.
[13:55] Onikobe
    What battlefield am I to be sent to next?
[14:00] Kato
    Your next battlefield...
[14:03] Kato
    is right here.
[14:08] Eita
    The first day since the
    bullies were dealt with...
[14:11] Eita
    It's like a whole new world.
[14:13] Eita
    Azuma made some excuse about being
    hospitalized, like a politician would...
[14:17] Eita
    And I don't see Noheji, either.
[14:20] Eita
    Kuro-san also isn't here, for some reason...
[14:24] Eita
    And everyone believes I kicked their asses.
[14:27] Eita
    I think my life might
    actually be turning around!
[14:29] Eita
    Maybe I'll become popular?!
[14:33] Eita
    Ow...
[14:36] Noheji
    Hey. Mind if I have a word?
[14:46] Eita
    This has gotta be payback
    for yesterday, right?
[14:49] Noheji
    Eita.
[14:53] Noheji
    Please! You've gotta bring that
    transfer student, Kuro-san, around.
[15:00] Noheji
    It's like... I know he's the
    one who actually hit me,
[15:04] Noheji
    and he... Kuro-san...
[15:06] Noheji
    is one of those folks you're not
    supposed to talk about in this country.
[15:09] Noheji
    He's a ninja, isn't he?!
[15:11] Eita
    You just said it out loud.
[15:12] Noheji
    And he's probably staying at
    your house for some reason, right?
[15:17] Eita
    Not exactly...
[15:18] Noheji
    Please! You've gotta help me meet Kuro-san!
[15:21] Eita
    Come on, I don't know
    what you expect me to—
[15:23] Kuro
    What's up?
[15:25] Eita
    You were here?!
[15:30] Noheji
    You kicked my ass like it was nothing!
    And I have a request!
[15:36] Eita
    Not happening...
[15:37] Noeheji
    Will you help me in a fight against
    some guys from another school?!
[15:41] Eita
    Kuro-san's got an exclusive contract with me.
[15:44] Kuro
    What are the details?
[15:47] Eita
    You're gonna hear him out?
[15:56] Ono
    Kuro-kun's actually at school.
[16:00] Kato
    Aw, that's a problem.
    This package is actually perishable.
[16:03] Ono
    Oh, I can hold it for him, then.
[16:06] Ono
    He doesn't have a refrigerator, anyway.
[16:08] Kato
    You're a lifesaver!
[16:10] Kato
    Can I get your stamp?
[16:11] Ono
    Uh, one second...
[16:15] Kato
    I really appreciate it.
[16:17] Ono
    Now, where did I put that thing?
[16:42] Kato
    You've been living here longer than
    anyone else in the building, right?
[16:45] Ono
    Hate to admit it, but it
    really is like home to me...
[16:49] Kato
    I'm curious, when did Kumogakure-san move in?
[16:53] Ono
    Kuro-kun kinda forced his way in...
[16:57] Ono
    Huh? Feels kinda like it was pretty recent,
    but also like he's always been there...
[17:02] Ono
    Huh?
[17:03] Kato
    He's been hypnotized.
[17:07] Kato
    Controlled so that his memories
    of Kumogakure are hazy.
[17:23] Noheji
    Thanks to my dad, I grew up reading 
    Gorillaman and Be-Bop, stuff like that.
[17:27] Kuro
    I read those, too.
[17:28] Noheji
    Really?! They're pretty great, right?
[17:31] Noheji
    So, I've always looked up
    to Yankee-style punks...
[17:34] Noheji
    But as I'm sure you know,
    they're kind of an endangered species.
[17:39] Noheji
    A brawl with guys from another school...
    I figured that was just a dream.
[17:42] Noheji
    So I was picking on weaklings instead,
    which is in no way satisfying.
[17:46] Eita
    That was the reason I was being bullied?
[17:49] Kuro**
    So, where's this going?
[17:52] Noheji
    It turns out there's a
    missing link here in Nerima.
[17:56] Noheji
    A regular coelacanth high school!
[17:59] Kuro
    And where is it?
[18:01] Noheji
    The Nerima Ward School...
[18:03] Noheji
    Yankii High!
[18:09] Kato
    Onikobe, what did you find
    in Kumogakure's room?
[18:13] Onikobe
    Sir, the tea table he had was
    an auto-deploying defense shield.
[18:19] Onikobe
    Also, installed beneath his floor
[18:21] Onikobe
    was a shelter capable of
    withstanding a bunker buster.
[18:26] Onikobe
    I believe the building itself
    still has more secrets.
[18:30] Onikobe
    Escape would be able to destroy it.
    I don't think it poses any real threat.
[18:35] Kato
    What about the other residents?
[18:38] Onikobe
    They're normal civilians, sir.
[18:40] Onikobe
    I'd have them under control in three minutes.
[18:44] Kato
    You think that too, huh?
[18:46] Kato
    I'll admit, going into that building,
    even I tend to lower my guard.
[18:49] Kato
    Rather, it's set up in a way
    to make me lower it.
[18:52] Kato
    They're so easygoing, it's unnatural.
[18:54] Kato
    They don't betray any kind of presence...
[18:56] Kato
    The same way a jonin would.
[18:59] Onikobe
    You think they're Kumogakure's bodyguards?
[19:02] Kato
    Can't tell. But we're at war.
[19:06] Kato
    There's no telling what might happen.
[19:12] Hibi
    What? You need something?
[19:14] Kuro
    Hey, Hibi.
[19:15] Kuro
    We're gonna go pick a fight with
    Yankii High School for no reason. You in?
[19:18] Hibi
    Oh, hell yeah.
[19:19] Eita
    So casual?!
[19:20] Hibi
    More importantly, did the school
    get hit with a laser yesterday?
[19:25] Kuro
    It was Escape. I called in fire support.
[19:28] Hibi
    Are you shitting me?
[19:30] Hibi
    That's top secret ninja tech,
    and you made the call?
[19:33] Hibi
    I can dodge lightning, but not that bad boy.
[19:36] Kuro
    The lightning did hit you, though.
[19:39] Noheji
    I hate to interrupt, but...
[19:43] Noheji
    Are you the legendary delinquent
    who single-handedly beat
[19:45] Noheji
    the ass of every punk in Nerima
    and eastern Tokyo,
[19:48] Noheji
    Thunder Hibi-san?!
[19:51] Hibi
    So you've heard of me.
[19:54] Noheji
    This is awesome!
[19:55] Noheji
    You were my hero in elementary school!
[19:59] Noheji
    Wait... What are you doing
    in this school, though?
[20:01] Noheji
    You'd have to be a fair bit older...
[20:06] Hibi
    It's part of the job.
[20:07] Hibi
    I wouldn't ask any more questions.
[20:09] Noheji
    Right! You got it!
[20:11] Eita
    What is with these people?
[20:13] Eita
    They're making it super obvious
    that they're ninja.
[20:16] Hibi
    But Kuro, if they let you use Escape,
[20:19] Hibi
    then this mission is probably a lot
    more dangerous than we thought.
[20:23] Hibi
    What's going on?
[20:25] Kuro
    I have no clue, but command
    wouldn't give a second thought
[20:28] Kuro
    to blowing the whole school away.
[20:32] Hibi
    We're looking at a second
    22-2-22 incident, then...
[20:38] Hibi
    You know, though,
[20:40] Hibi
    I wish we had a reason to raid these guys
    rather than it being totally random.
[20:44] Noheji
    In terms of motivation for brawls,
    someone's girl being stolen is a big one.
[20:49] Kuro
    I was wondering, who's that girl
    who had you carrying the box, Eita?
[20:55] Eita
    Yamada-san?
[20:57] Noheji
    That's her.
[20:59] Noheji
    She's the prettiest girl in school,
    but she's kinda... Well, just look at her.
[21:04] Noheji
    Makes people tend to keep their distance.
[21:06] Eita
    Ew, she's eating her boogers.
[21:09] Kuro
    Boogers are actually a natural
    supplement, rich in vitamin D.
[21:14] Kuro
    I'm impressed.
[21:16] Eita
    You're lying. I know you're lying.
[21:18] Kuro
    Do you really think she'll cooperate?
[21:22] Kuro
    By letting those punks get on her case.
[21:29] Noheji
    She says it's okay.
[21:31] Eita
    That was fast!
[21:34] Eita
    They said to put my hair in a pompadour
    since we're going to Yankii High...
[21:39] Eita
    But I don't wanna.
[21:42] Lady
    Ei-chan! How's your mom been?
[21:45] Lady
    I heard you're going back to school!
[21:47] Eita
    Yeah...
[21:48] Lady
    Oh, pomade, huh?
[21:51] Lady
    Back in school, feeling saucy...
    Got a date or something?
[21:55] Lady
    Well, you make sure to take care
    of your mother, Ei-chan!
[21:59] Lady
    Thanks, come again!
[22:02] Eita
    I seriously have no idea what
    that lady's deal is.
[22:05] Eita
    I've asked Mom about her
    and she says she doesn't know.
[22:09] Eita
    Just who is she?
SIGN    Episode 7: "Meow Meow, Meow Meow, Meow Meow Meow Meow Meow?"
[23:55] Kuro
    Yours is somewhere around the 6800s for
    common family names in Japan, Ozu-san.
[23:59] Ozu
    That's a shockamole!
[24:00] Kuro
    A... shocka-what?
[24:03] Ozu
    I'm saying it's a shock, obviously.
[24:05] Ozu
    It's a regular holy guacamole
    shockamole, you see.
[24:08] Kuro
    I'm sorry, could you speak Japanese?