Season 1

E1 - Throw a Rock, Hit a Ninja
Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:05] Captain
    Get ready. Go!
[00:17] Delta 1
    Clear!
[00:18] Delta 2
    Clear!
[00:19] Delta 3
    Clear!
[00:19] Delta 4
    All clear!
[00:21] Captain
    Here!
[00:27] Captain
    Rock 'n' roll!
[00:31] Captain
    Freeze! Hands up!
[00:34] Delta 1
    Shit, what the hell is this?
[00:37] Delta 2
    Is it a bomb?
[00:39] Captain
    Nah, it ain't a bomb. It's a sword.
[00:42] Captain
    Look carefully.
[00:43] Captain
    His thumb for pressing the phone's
    detonation button and his head
[00:47] Captain
    got slashed off by a sword.
[00:50] Captain
    Nobody else can do this but ninja.
[00:53] Captain
    Look what's on the corner of the desk.
[00:57] Captain
    It's an origami.
[00:59] Delta 1
    Ninja... I wanted to see them for real.
[01:02] Captain
    Are you kidding me? You wanna die?
[01:05] Captain
    Thank God and your mommy
    you didn't see them.
[01:14] Hibi
    Mind the pipe.
[01:16] Hibi
    It's surprisingly easy to trip on.
[01:18] Kuro
    Uh-huh.
[01:31] Hibi
    Looks like we're all here.
[03:06] Hibi
    Careful. There's gum on the ground.
SIGN    Episode 1: Throw a Rock, Hit a Ninja
[03:09] Kuro
    Yeah.
[03:10] Hibi
    It's been a long time, Kumogakure Kuro.
[03:14] Hibi
    Then again, I guess I saw you at that
    run-down apartment the other day.
[03:17] Hibi
    You've always been great at
    escaping and staying hidden.
[03:24] Kuro
    Your burns from the lightning
    strike healed, Hibi?
[03:30] Hibi
    I'm covering it up with makeup, man.
[03:32] Hibi
    But the scars won't heal
    until I take you down.
[03:37] Hibi
    Which I wouldn't mind doing right now.
[03:41] Hibi
    Are you listening?
[03:43] Kuro
    Hang on, my dick's kinda...
[03:46] Kuro
    Oh, damn it. I stepped on the gum.
[03:51] Kuro
    I noticed you staring.
[03:54] Kuro
    What's your real name?
[03:55] Suzuki
    Wait, me?
[03:57] Suzuki
    I've got a bunch of Ninja Handles, but...
[04:00] Suzuki
    My real name's Suzuki.
[04:02] Kuro
    Suzuki...
[04:04] Kuro
    The second most common
    name in the country. You win.
[04:07] Kuro
    Well, Hibi is, like, 1,500th,
    so he can't compete.
[04:11] Kuro
    1,500th... Pfft.
[04:15] Kuro
    So, you guys ask me to come to
    this roof, which is super visible...
[04:19] Kuro
    Are you stupid or something?
[04:21] Hibi
    I mean, isn't the normal routine to gather
    everybody and have a cool-looking pose-off?
[04:26] Kuro
    We're not in Jump, man.
[04:28] Kuro
    A sniper could take us all out.
    Let's call it a day already.
[04:31] Suzuki
    Wait, really?
[04:33] Suzuki
    I don't read manga.
[04:35] Hachiya
    I'm not familiar, either.
[04:37] Hibi
    I've always wanted to assemble
    the team like this, though...
[04:40] Hachiya
    I get what you're saying, Kuro-san,
[04:43] Hachiya
    but take a look over there.
[04:47] Hachiya
    The enemy's assembled, too.
[04:49] Kuro
    So they're just as stupid?
[04:54] Kuro
    Who're we dealing with here, Hachiya?
[04:57] Hachiya
    The Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare's
    Rear Support Maneuvers Division 2.
[05:00] Hachiya
    They're called the Rear-Enders.
[05:04] Kuro
    Hachiya...
[05:06] Kuro
    Does anyone actually do
    ganguro-style fashion anymore?
[05:09] Hachiya
    This is bad. They're
    definitely coming after us.
[05:12] Hibi
    Then I'll make the first move.
[05:16] Kuro
    Seriously, quit acting like we're in Jump.
[05:19] Kuro
    Who's the strongest one here?
[05:24] Hachiya
    Well, definitely not me.
[05:27] Kuro
    Ultimately, results are all
    that matters with shinobi.
[05:30] Kuro
    I beat the dick-slicing foreigner,
    so that makes me strongest.
[05:34] Kuro
    If I take their strongest
    fighter out, this'll be over.
[05:38] Kuro
    Hachiya, who's their strongest?
[05:42] Hachiya
    Going by their builds, probably her.
[05:46] Kuro
    Nah. Usually you can count on
    the biggest to be number two.
[05:50] Kuro
    Number one's gotta be her.
[05:54] Kuro
    She'll have some kind of
    ultimate form, like Frieza,
[05:57] Kuro
    that'll result in a simpler design.
[06:00] Hibi
    You actually love Jump, don't you, Kuro?
SIGN    You've got a laser pointer, don't you?
SIGN    The school's got ears everywhere.
SIGN    I've got one, but what do you need it for?
SIGN    And yeah, I know.
SIGN    Be ready for my signal. And good.
SIGN    You'll want to hit her arm with the laser.
SIGN    The real enemy is the director.
SIGN    Yeah, that makes sense.
[06:26] Kuro
    All right, I'm heading out.
[06:29] Hachiya
    Be careful.
[06:32] Kuro
    Down we go...
[06:39] Kuro
    How'd it even come to this?
SIGN    September 9th
SIGN    July 22nd
[06:57] (Flashback) Kuro
    Seven out of ten.
[07:11] (Flashback) Kuro
    Four out of ten.
[07:22] (Flashback) Kuro
    Zero out of ten.
[07:29] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'm so bored.
[07:32] (Flashback) Kato
    Sure seems like it.
[07:41] (Flashback) Kato
    What is this? Assassination practice?
[07:44] (Flashback) Kuro
    N-No! Nothing that fancy.
[07:47] (Flashback) Kato
    I'm coming in.
[07:48] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yeah, please, go right ahead!
[07:53] (Flashback) Kato
    It's so damn hot.
[07:55] (Flashback) Kuro
    S-Sure is.
[07:57] Kuro
    I didn't notice him at all...
[08:00] Kuro
    He must be a career ninja.
[08:06] (Flashback) Kato
    You not gonna offer me a cold drink?
[08:09] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sorry about that!
[08:10] (Flashback) Kato
    I was joking. I already saw there was no fridge.
[08:15] (Flashback) Kuro
    I, uh, share a fridge with the
    person in the next room over...
[08:20] (Flashback) Kato
    Lately, so many non-career ninja
    have been failing to get any jobs
[08:24] (Flashback) Kato
    that there've been rumors of
    some making a break for it.
[08:29] (Flashback) Kato
    So, despite the extra work, we've been
    making the rounds to check on them.
[08:32] (Flashback) Kuro
    S-Sir, I would never consider running away!
[08:35] (Flashback) Kuro
    All I need is a job, and I'll work my butt off.
[08:38] (Flashback) Kato
    It's no skin off the organization's ass
    how many of you run off, really.
[08:44] (Flashback) Kuro
    That's fair, yeah.
[08:46] (Flashback) Kato
    Regulations are what they are, though.
[08:49] (Flashback) Kato
    Remember that any attempt
    to escape will get you erased.
[08:52] (Flashback) Kuro
    O-Of course, sir.
[08:56] (Flashback) Kato
    So...
[09:01] (Flashback) Kato
    I have a job for you.
[09:03] (Flashback) Kuro
    Y-You do? What is it?
[09:06] (Flashback) Kuro
    Oh, I have to figure that
    out myself, right? Okay.
[09:11] (Flashback) Kato
    I have to say, the famous Kumogakure
    clan has really fallen off.
[09:30] (Flashback) Kato
    What's this? Going for my eyes?
[09:32] (Flashback) Kuro
    N-No, it's just...
[09:35] (Flashback) Kuro
    The toothpick in the ceiling fell.
[09:38] (Flashback) Kato
    Oh, this?
[09:44] (Flashback) Kato
    I'd say that's a ten out of ten.
[09:50] (Flashback) Kuro
    Holy shit...
[09:52] (Flashback) Kuro
    Well, the box seems normal enough.
[09:55] (Flashback) Kuro
    A blazer? Seems like part of a school uniform.
[09:58] (Flashback) Kuro
    And it comes with a hoodie...
[10:01] (Flashback) Kuro
    Why, though?
[10:20] (Flashback) Kuro
    Huh...
[10:24] (Flashback) Kuro
    I get it. Dress for the ninja jobs you want.
[10:32] (Flashback) Kuro
    I guess I'm supposed to
    infiltrate this school.
[10:40] School worker
    Hello, this is Kodan High School.
[10:43] Kuro
    That was a close one.
[10:44] Kuro
    Just remembered that parents usually
    handle the transfer process.
[10:48] Kuro
    I could claim to be the father, but that'd
    seem out of place with the time of day.
[10:53] Kuro
    It'd make more sense for the mother to call.
[10:56] Kuro
    Unless specified otherwise,
[10:58] Kuro
    a Genin is supposed to move
    as soon as an order is received.
[11:02] Kuro
    This lady's the only woman
    in this apartment complex...
[11:06] Kuro
    and she's not around.
[11:08] Kuro
    And is it really wise to leave your window
    wide open with your underwear out to dry?
[11:16] (Flashback) Kuro
    Kawado-san? You in?
[11:21] (Flashback) Kawado
    Hey, Kumogakure-kun,
    can you get me some toilet paper?
[11:27] (Flashback) Kuro
    Uh, sure, okay.
[11:29] (Flashback) Kuro
    Where do you keep it, again?
[11:35] (Flashback) Kawado
    It's in the damn bathroom, obviously!
[11:39] (Flashback) Kuro
    Couldn't you get it yourself, then?
[11:42] (Flashback) Kawado
    I obviously can't! Why is this
    old dump laid out like this?!
[11:47] (Flashback) Kawado
    And who the fuck leaves
    the toilet paper so far away?!
[11:50] Kawado
    That piece-of-shit landlord!
    Does he not wipe his ass?!
[11:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    Well, she's obviously hammered.
[11:54] Kawado
    This is bullshit!
[11:56] (Flashback) Kuro
    But considering I don't have
    anyone else I can ask...
[12:01] (Flashback) Kawado
    You can come in,
    but if you look, you're dead.
[12:04] (Flashback) Kawado
    I'll have you cast out of society!
[12:07] Kuro
    Oh, so that's how it's gonna be, huh?
[12:12] Kuro
    I am a shinobi.
[12:14] Kuro
    And I make the impossible possible.
[12:33] (Flashback) Kuro
    Here you go.
[12:39] (Flashback) Kawado
    Quit looking!
[12:44] (Flashback) Kawado
    Hello? Is this Kodan High School?
[12:48] (Flashback) Kawado
    It's me! Y'know, me?
[12:51] (Flashback) Kawado
    Come on, who else could it be?
    Now gimme whoever's in charge.
[12:56] (Flashback) Kawado
    What for? C'mon, you know why!
[12:59] (Flashback) Kawado
    It's because my son's
    going to enroll over there!
[13:05] (Flashback) Kuro
    Huh? Well, she's had
    a little bit to drink, yes.
[13:09] (Flashback) Kuro
    She's not normally this bad.
[13:12] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yes. I'm fine.
[13:15] (Flashback) Kuro
    Thanks for your help.
[13:17] (Flashback) Kuro
    Kawado-san.
[13:18] (Flashback) Kuro
    Masterful performance. I appreciate it.
[13:22] (Flashback) Kuro
    You helped create a really
    convincing family background.
[13:24] (Flashback) Kawado
    Oh, for real?
[13:26] (Flashback) Kawado
    I played a stepmother a lot
    at the role-playing club, so...
[13:31] (Flashback) Kuro
    Bravo.
[13:33] (Flashback) Kawado
    Okay, now drinks are on you,
    like you promised!
[13:41] (Flashback) Kuro
    Gonna need to borrow these, Ono-san.
[13:47] (Flashback) Kuro
    Here. Beer.
[13:49] (Flashback) Kuro
    Just the one, though.
[13:51] (Flashback) Kawado
    How come your room is
    connected to your neighbor's?
[13:55] (Flashback) Kuro
    Not sure. It's been like that since I moved in.
[14:00] (Flashback) Kuro
    Thanks to that, I don't
    need my own refrigerator.
[14:03] (Flashback) Kuro
    So, the entrance exam seems to have
    a minimum English score required...
[14:07] (Flashback) Kuro
    How hard would that be for
    the second year of high school?
[14:13] (Flashback) Kawado
    You're really gonna ask me, when I
    dropped out three days into high school?
[14:18] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sorry.
[14:19] (Flashback) Kuro
    I never attended class myself.
[14:23] (Flashback) Kawado
    Come to think of it, where is your mom?
[14:26] (Flashback) Kuro
    According to my father, she said "trouble's
    here" after I was born and then was gone.
SIGN    Mother:
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    Father:
SIGN    Trouble (Kuro) is here.
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    Kuro (9th son) is here.
[14:33] (Flashback) Kuro
    But my father misheard her,
[14:36] (Flashback) Kuro
    and ended up signing the paperwork
    under the wrong impression.
[14:39] (Flashback) Kawado
    Wait, that's why your name is Kuro?
[14:43] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yep.
[14:44] (Flashback) Kawado
    Not because you're the youngest out of nine?
[14:48] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'm an only child.
[14:52] (Flashback) Kuro
    I was actually best friends
    in middle school with a guy
[14:56] (Flashback) Kuro
    whose name was "Miracle,"
    written with the kanji for "kiseki."
[14:59] (Flashback) Kuro
    But he died in a lightning strike.
[15:06] (Flashback) Kuro
    It's actually a sad story...
[15:08] (Flashback) Kawado
    Oh, my sides!
[15:11] (Flashback) Kawado
    How old are you, anyway?!
[15:13] (Flashback) Kuro
    Seventeen years old.
[15:18] (Flashback) Kawado
    I-I could've sworn you were older!
[15:21] (Flashback) Kawado
    When I sleep, it's usually on
    the upper shelf in the closet,
[15:24] (Flashback) Kawado
    with Ono-san on the floor.
[15:26] (Flashback) Kawado
    Like Doraemon?
[15:29] (Flashback) Kuro
    Oh, here it comes, here it comes...
[15:32] (Flashback) Kuro
    Watch this.
[15:35] (Flashback) Kawado
    Nailed it!
[15:57] (Flashback) Kuro
    Thanks for the drinks.
[15:59] (Flashback) Ono
    Oh, what a relief! I've got some work!
[16:07] (Flashback) Ono
    Time for a celebratory beer!
[16:12] (Flashback) Ono
    I could've sworn I just saw someone.
[16:27] (Flashback) Ono
    Hey! Kumogakure-kun, what the heck?
[16:30] (Flashback) Ono
    Did you drink all my beer?!
[16:34] (Flashback) Ono
    Huh? He's gone.
[16:38] (Flashback) Ono
    You're the one who drank all
    my precious beer, aren't you?!
[16:42] (Flashback) Kawado
    I don't know what you're talking about.
[16:45] (Flashback) Ono
    I've got the evidence right here.
SIGN    Ono
[16:47] (Flashback) Ono
    I wrote this! And I found
    the can in your room!
[16:52] (Flashback) Kawado
    Ono is a name I used
    when I worked as a hostess.
[16:56] (Flashback) Ono
    Oh, come on! Don't lie!
[16:58] (Flashback) Ono
    I can go to the police
    about this, you realize?!
[17:02] (Flashback) Kawado
    The cops? That works out perfect.
[17:04] (Flashback) Kawado
    I can tell them how you stole my underwear.
[17:09] (Flashback) Ono
    I did no such thing!
[17:12] (Flashback) Kawado
    Then where the hell are they?
[17:36] Kato
    I see.
[17:37] Kato
    So the top brass want to deal
    with the MHLW's Rear-Enders.
[17:43] Kato
    And why wasn't I told about this?
[17:46] Ozu
    Partly because you don't take apprentices.
[17:49] Kato
    What about Onikobe?
[17:51] Ozu
    The woman's a serial killer.
[17:53] Ozu
    She's too dangerous to let into the country.
[17:55] Ozu
    More importantly, out of the four
    Genin we sent into Kodan High School,
SIGN    Shinobin
[18:00] Ozu
    three were taught personally by us Chunin.
[18:04] Ozu
    But Kumogakure Kuro's
    got no record to speak of.
[18:11] Ozu
    So I checked his file to see
    what he's done before...
[18:15] Ozu
    And what the hell is this?
[18:17] Ozu
    He spends his days lazing
    about a run-down apartment.
[18:21] Ozu
    Sometimes he leeches beer off
    his neighbor and goes into hiding.
[18:25] Ozu
    You sure this kid isn't just some NEET?
[18:35] Kato
    But it was Kumogakure Kuro
    who took that foreigner down.
SIGN    September 9th
SIGN    July 23rd
[18:53] (Flashback) Ozu
    Well, what can I help you with?
[18:57] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Yes. Where do I find ninja?
[19:03] (Flashback) Ozu
    Do you understand Japanese?
[19:05] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Yes.
[19:06] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Little bit.
[19:08] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Kanji is very hard.
[19:11] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I come to Japan to become ninja.
[19:15] (Flashback) Ozu
    Yeah, okay, I see that.
[19:18] (Flashback) Ozu
    We actually get a lot of
    foreigners asking about that.
[19:21] (Flashback) Foreigner
    So, where can I meet a ninja?
[19:25] (Flashback) Ozu
    Well, one's right behind you.
[19:31] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Ninja! Where are you?
[19:34] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Is it you?
[19:36] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Or him?
[19:37] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Who is it?
[19:39] (Flashback) Ozu
    Whoa, hey! Don't swing that sword around!
[19:42] (Flashback) Foreigner
    No.
[19:44] (Flashback) Foreigner
    This is an umbrella. I buy in Asakusa.
[19:48] (Flashback) Ozu
    I noticed, but it's still dangerous, okay?
[19:52] (Flashback) Ozu
    There's a Japanese saying...
[19:58] (Flashback) Ozu
    "Throw a stone, and you'll hit a ninja."
[20:02] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I know the saying.
[20:04] (Flashback) Foreigner
    What does it mean?
[20:06] (Flashback) Ozu
    It means there are so many ninja around,
    you can throw a rock at random and hit one.
[20:11] (Flashback) Ozu
    That's what.
[20:14] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Where are they?!
[20:15] (Flashback) Ozu
    Easy there. There's more to the saying.
[20:19] (Flashback) Ozu
    "Throw a stone, and you'll hit a ninja...
[20:22] (Flashback) Ozu
    but you won't know who it hit.
[20:25] (Flashback) Ozu
    They're everywhere, and nobody knows."
[20:29] (Flashback) Ozu
    That's how ninja are.
[20:31] (Flashback) Ozu
    You won't find any ninja in Japan who
    actually look like ninja, the way you do.
[20:36] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Ninja...
[20:40] Narrator
    After the war in the Pacific
    theater drew to a close,
[20:43] Narrator
    upon arriving in Japan, the Allied General
    Headquarters issued Special Order 1,
[20:49] Narrator
    demanding the Imperial forces
    and Ministry of Home Affairs
[20:52] Narrator
    provide the roster of affiliated ninja,
    along with their surrender.
[20:57] Narrator
    Securing the Japanese ninja,
    who had been the most consistent threat
[21:00] Narrator
    over the course of the war
    to the Allied powers,
[21:02] Narrator
    was considered to be crucial to the US,
[21:05] Narrator
    establishing their superpower
    position in the post-war status quo.
[21:09] Narrator
    In fact, while he was stationed in Japan,
    MacArthur had come under attack by ninja,
[21:14] Narrator
    only for the situation to be resolved
    by a faction of pro-American ninja.
[21:20] Narrator
    Ultimately, however, the majority of ninja
    organizations were dissolved by the GHQ.
[21:27] Narrator
    But in the seven decades following the war,
[21:30] Narrator
    the world entered an era of religious
    and ethnic wars, as well as terrorism.
[21:37] Narrator
    The ninja, thought extinct,
[21:40] Narrator
    would demonstrate their abilities
    on the front lines of these conflicts,
[21:43] Narrator
    performing assassination and
    sabotage missions in absolute secrecy.
[21:48] Narrator
    And these numerous ninja have infiltrated
[21:51] Narrator
    the majority of Japan's public
    and private institutions,
[21:56] Narrator
    where they monitor the people in secret.
[22:01] (Flashback) Kato
    Got a delivery here.
[22:09] Narration
    The ninja had survived.
[22:13] Narration
    They are rumored to number 200,000.
[22:17] Narration
    Ninja still exist in Japan to this day.
SIGN    Episode 2: I Want to Be a Ninja
[23:56] Kuro
    Kato's the tenth most common
    family name in Japan, you know.
[23:59] Kato
    Your point is?
[24:00] Kuro
    I just barely win.
[24:02] Kuro
    Since Kumogakure is within the top nine
    most common family names in Japan.
[24:07] Kato
    No, I really doubt that.

E2 - I Want to Be a Ninja
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:17] Kuro
    Surrender and I can guarantee you'll live.
[00:21] Kuro
    You can't think the government
    has a chance against shinobi.
[00:24] Mako
    I have my doubts about you being
    able to win with that attitude.
[00:28] Mako
    This rotating twister dagger...
[00:31] Mako
    is more than capable of piercing
    that blade-proof hoodie of yours.
[00:36] Kuro
    Take a look at the back of your hand.
[00:44] Kuro
    Finally noticed?
[00:47] Kuro
    Did you really think shinobi like us would
[00:49] Kuro
    infiltrate enemy territory
    without fire support?
[00:52] Kuro
    When I give the signal,
    your arm will evaporate.
[00:55] Kuro
    Our reach extends to
    anywhere in the atmosphere...
[01:01] Kuro
    with our "Escape."
[01:11] Hachiya
    Granted, that's a lie.
[01:15] Kato
    The incident this summer where
    someone was cutting off male organs.
[01:21] Kato
    There was a decent amount of talk about it.
SIGN    Shinobin
[01:25] Kato
    The foreigner responsible for it
[01:27] Kato
    made a lot of noise about ninja,
    so the top brass were concerned.
[01:32] Kato
    They selected a handful of Genin
    and sent them after the foreigner.
[01:38] Ozu
    Yeah. I remember it all right.
SIGN    September 9th
[01:42] Ozu
    Because I was the foreigner's
    first point of contact.
SIGN    July 23rd
SIGN    Nimble, invisible.
SIGN    Nightly Japanese agent... ninja.
SIGN    They're everywhere, 
    but impossible to find.
SIGN    There's something so philosophical about that.
SIGN    I want to be a ninja.
SIGN    Episode 2: "I Want to Be a Ninja"
[04:01] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Where are you, ninja?
SIGN    Foot and Bicycle Traffic
[04:19] (Flashback) Sasama
    All right, you little squirts!
[04:22] (Flashback) Sasama
    Drink the breast milk!
    Breast milk, fresh from the tap!
[04:28] (Flashback) Kid A
    It's him! It's Mr. Breast Milk!
[04:32] (Flashback) Sasama
    Come on, step right up and
    have a drink! It's breast milk!
[04:35] (Flashback) Sasama
    You can even suck from
    the source, if you want!
[04:42] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Ninja...
SIGN    Wh-What the...
SIGN    Some kind of ninja code?!
SIGN    Why so close to the ground?
SIGN    To keep it hidden from view?!
SIGN    Are there more?!
SIGN    Anything else?!
SIGN    Anywhere!
SIGN    Warning: If you piss here,
    I'll cut your rotten rod off.
SIGN    This is it.
SIGN    Hey, it's you.
SIGN    Kinda surprised you actually called.
SIGN    Me?
SIGN    I'm in Germany.
SIGN    For work.
SIGN    With you having left,
SIGN    there's more to do.
SIGN    So, what do you want?
SIGN    I see it.
SIGN    Warning: If you piss here,
    I'll cut your rotten rod off.
SIGN    No doubt about it.
SIGN    This is a message from the ninja.
SIGN    As for what it means...
SIGN    Whoa.
SIGN    Pardon me.
SIGN    It says to cut the dick off of  anyone taking a piss on the wall.
SIGN    Rod is slang for dick.
SIGN    You'll wanna cut two or three off,
SIGN    and then the ninja will make contact with you.
SIGN    Don't mention it. I'm glad to help.
SIGN    If you're able to infiltrate the 
    world's greatest order of killers,
SIGN    it only stands to benefit us.
SIGN    And until then, consider your daughter
SIGN    to be in our care.
SIGN    Infants can be quite handy, after all.
SIGN    If I cut three dicks off,
SIGN    I can become a ninja.
SIGN    If I become a ninja,
SIGN    I can save my daughter.
[06:42] (Flashback) Driver
    Ai-chan! You want a lift back to your place?
[06:45] (Flashback) Kawado
    Oh, that's cool. I'm gonna
    drop by the convenience store.
[06:49] (Flashback) Driver
    Okay.
[06:50] (Flashback) Kawado
    Good work today.
[06:53] (Flashback) Kawado
    Y'know, I should probably
    give Ono-san some beer.
[07:02] (Flashback) Old dude
    Hey, girlie, what're you staring at?
[07:05] (Flashback) Old dude
    You some kinda perv,
    sizing up my schlong like that?
[07:08] (Flashback) Old dude
    If you want a better look...
[07:10] (Flashback) Kawado
    Dickhead.
[07:11] (Flashback) Old dude
    Huh?! You want a piece of this?!
[07:13] (Flashback) Kawado
    Dickhead.
[07:14] (Flashback) Old dude
    Hey! Get back here!
[07:15] (Flashback) Kawado
    Dickhead!
[07:16] (Flashback) Old dude
    You got no vocabulary, do you?!
[07:18] (Flashback) Kawado
    Dickhead!
[07:20] Kawado
    Huh, a foreigner.
[07:28] (Flashback) Ono
    That stupid girl...
[07:31] (Flashback) Ono
    She chugs all of my beer,
[07:35] (Flashback) Ono
    and then accuses me
    of stealing her underwear!
[07:38] (Flashback) Kuro
    Ono-san!
[07:40] (Flashback) Kuro
    Why are you wearing Kawado-san's bra?
[07:45] (Flashback) Kuro
    Why don't you tell me all
    about it over some drinks?
[07:48] (Flashback) Ono
    W-Well, actually, Kawado-san drank
    all my booze, so I've got none...
[07:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    Oh, don't worry.
[07:56] (Flashback) Kuro
    There's that plum brandy
    underneath the kitchenette
[07:59] (Flashback) Kuro
    that your elderly mom sends you every year.
[08:03] (Flashback) Ono
    How do you know about that?!
[08:06] (Flashback) Kuro
    Well, cheers.
[08:08] (Flashback) Ono
    Well... sure. Cheers.
[08:16] (Flashback) Kuro
    Missus Ono's plum brandy really hits the spot!
[08:20] (Flashback) Kuro
    I think I'll have some more.
[08:22] (Flashback) Kuro
    Oh, don't mind me. I can pour it myself.
[08:27] (Flashback) Ono
    How exactly are you familiar
    with its taste, anyway?
[08:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    So, regarding this bra situation...
[08:40] (Flashback) Ono
    Well... it was about two weeks ago.
[08:44] (Flashback) Ono
    Since I had been fired from my
    old job, I was drunk off my ass,
[08:47] (Flashback) Ono
    and on my way back to the apartment.
[08:51] (Flashback) Ono
    That evening, it was weirdly hot.
[08:54] (Flashback) Ono
    There was no breeze at all.
    Just an overall creepy night.
[08:58] (Flashback) Ono
    And when I glanced upward at random...
[09:03] (Flashback) Ono
    There was a bra flying in the sky!
[09:07] (Flashback) Ono
    You can imagine how shocked I was!
[09:10] (Flashback) Ono
    And as disturbing a sight
    as it was, I jumped after it!
[09:15] (Flashback) Ono
    But when I caught it, I got the
    feeling someone was watching me.
[09:20] (Flashback) Ono
    So, despite being creeped out the entire time...
[09:24] (Flashback) Ono
    I cast my gaze downward.
[09:30] (Flashback) Ono
    And there he was! Between
    the apartment and the wall!
[09:34] (Flashback) Ono
    He was white as a sheet, and staring
    at me with his eyes wide open!
[09:39] (Flashback) Ono
    It was the ghost of a little boy!
[09:43] (Flashback) Kuro
    I think that was probably just some
    freshly pubescent neighborhood kid
[09:48] (Flashback) Kuro
    who was flying a drone, actually.
[09:51] (Flashback) Kuro
    He's been peeping on Kawado-san's
    room pretty regularly.
[09:55] (Flashback) Kuro
    I guess he's upgraded to stealing underwear.
[09:58] (Flashback) Ono
    Don't you think that's the kind of thing
    you should tell Kawado-san?!
[10:01] (Flashback) Kuro
    More importantly, if you'd explained what
    happened and returned the bra to Kawado-san,
[10:06] (Flashback) Kuro
    wouldn't that have avoided any issues?
[10:10] (Flashback) Ono
    Th-The thing is... I rushed
    inside my room, terrified.
[10:18] (Flashback) Ono
    And then I suddenly felt nauseous...
    and the bra was there, so...
[10:23] (Flashback) Ono
    Now, I did take it to the laundromat
    to clean it the next day!
[10:27] (Flashback) Ono
    But I realized... Wouldn't it be even
    weirder if I returned it freshly washed?
[10:31] (Flashback) Ono
    So I've been unable to give it back...
[10:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    Ono-san... That doesn't explain
    why you're wearing it, though.
SIGN    I want to be a ninja
[10:46] News
    Last night, a man was assaulted
    on the street in 2-chome
[10:49] News
    in Nerima Ward's Koinu neighborhood.
[10:53] News
    The victim was seriously injured,
[10:54] News
    and the police are treating the
    incident as randomly targeted.
[10:55] (Flashback) Kawado
    So tired...
[10:59] News
    And now, our next story.
[11:00] (Flashback) Kawado
    That's close by.
SIGN    Late July 24th
[11:06] Sasama
    Not getting a lot of pressure
    out of my stream tonight...
[11:12] Narrator
    Despite it being for a mission, he was
    reluctant to grab another man's organ.
[11:18] Narrator
    Thus, he would think back to the oden
    he had eaten on his first day in Japan,
[11:23] Narrator
    in order to better execute his task.
[11:26] Narrator
    By imagining the penis as a
    fried tofu pouch wiener roll,
[11:30] Narrator
    he was able to dull his sense of revulsion...
[11:33] Narrator
    But he soon realized his mistake.
[11:37] Narrator
    The shaft that he had been imagining as a
    piece of oden... was actually a piece of oden.
[11:44] (Flashback) Foreigner
    He'll get behind me!
[11:46] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Or not?!
[12:00] (Flashback) Sasama
    Not moving the way I'd like to...
[12:02] Foreigner
    A ninja.
[12:04] Foreigner
    I thought I would need three dicks, but...
[12:06] Foreigner
    I've managed to make contact.
[12:09] Foreigner
    What is this feeling of elation?
[12:11] Foreigner
    Is it the joy of getting to fight a member
    of the world's greatest league of killers?
[12:16] Sasama
    A karambit knife?
    Some Russian assassin, then?
[12:20] Foreigner
    For a moment... even
    if it was just a moment...
[12:23] Foreigner
    That thrill was stronger than
    my dedication to my daughter!
[13:13] Foreigner
    I need to be cautious of
    those tricky ninja moves.
[13:18] Foreigner
    Gotta think of him as moving
    in 3D, not just on a plane.
[13:40] (Flashback) Sasama
    Om anichi...
[13:43] (Flashback) Sasama
    Marishiei...
[13:46] (Flashback) Sasama
    Sowaka.
SIGN    He vanished?!
SIGN    But just the torso?!
SIGN    That must be ninjutsu...
SIGN    A camouflage technique, maybe.
SIGN    My attacks amounted to nothing...
SIGN    Ninja live up to their reputation.
SIGN    The same day, 8 hours prior
[14:21] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'm not getting much from wearing this.
[14:25] (Flashback) Kuro
    Bras really are more fun to take
    off someone else than wear yourself.
[14:29] (Flashback) Kuro
    Y'know, I've never had the desire
    to steal one before...
[14:33] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yet, once Ono-san was gone, I had the
    urge to grab this without asking him.
[14:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    Is it just their inherent charm?
[14:41] (Flashback) Kato
    You seem bored.
[14:49] (Flashback) Kato
    And you talk to yourself. A lot.
[14:51] (Flashback) Kato
    You haven't spilled any classified
    information like that, have you?
[14:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    Of course not!
[14:56] (Flashback) Kuro
    This is just... rehearsing
    the kind of act to put on
[14:58] (Flashback) Kuro
    when I want to play a weirdo
    that people want distance from.
[15:04] (Flashback) Kato
    So that hoodie was inside the
    package I gave you last time?
[15:09] (Flashback) Kuro
    Oh, right. Along with a high school uniform...
[15:13] Kato
    Looks like it's blade-proof and bulletproof.
SIGN    Marishiten
[15:18] Kato
    Marishiten 4.0?
[15:26] (Flashback) Kuro
    So... want anything to drink?
[15:29] (Flashback) Kato
    I'm not in the mood to be served
    drinks by someone dressed like you.
[15:32] (Flashback) Kato
    I want an update on the progress of your job.
[15:35] (Flashback) Kuro
    Right.
[15:36] (Flashback) Kuro
    After opening the package I received,
[15:38] (Flashback) Kuro
    I discerned that the mission was
    to infiltrate a high school...
[15:41] (Flashback) Kuro
    So I've been on standby at home until
    the entrance exam, which is this Saturday.
[15:46] (Flashback) Kato
    I see. That means you've got
    three days of free time, then?
[15:51] (Flashback) Kato
    Have you heard of the Nerima Slasher?
[15:53] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yeah, from the web.
    Something about dicks getting cut off?
[15:58] (Flashback) Kato
    Your job...
[16:00] (Flashback) Kato
    is to dispose of him within three days.
[16:08] Kuro
    That career ninja froze for a
    second when he saw the hoodie.
[16:13] Kuro
    There must be something more to it.
[16:21] Kuro
    Om anichi marishiei sowaka.
[16:29] Mako
    Ridiculous. Is that the
    latest Marishiten model?
[16:32] Mako
    The Metro PD's leaks were accurate.
[16:34] Mako
    It only conceals the upper body,
    with the rest being clear as day.
[16:58] Kato
    Say, Ozu...
[17:00] Kato
    You ever seen a Marishisten 4.0?
[17:03] Ozu
    No. Don't they only go
    to front-line operators?
[17:07] Kato
    You'd think so.
[17:10] Kato
    Sasama-san was hinting
    about this on that day...
SIGN    September 9th
SIGN    July 25th
[17:24] (Flashback) Junna
    Blue hoodie...
[17:27] (Flashback) Junna
    A foreigner with blond hair and glasses...
[17:30] (Flashback) Junna
    In a blue hoodie...
[17:33] (Flashback) Sasama
    Whatcha looking for?
[17:35] (Flashback) Junna
    None of your business, Mr. Breast Milk!
[17:37] (Flashback) Sasama
    You been eating properly?
[17:40] (Flashback) Junna
    Sure have. Steak, and pasta
    Napolitan, and fried oysters...
[17:44] (Flashback) Junna
    But the thing is, I'm on a diet.
[17:47] (Flashback) Sasama
    A diet?
[17:51] (Flashback) Sasama
    Little kids gotta eat, drink, and poop plenty!
[17:55] (Flashback) Sasama
    Here, have some breast milk!
[17:57] (Flashback) Junna
    Ew, there it is! The breast milk!
[18:00] (Flashback) Sasama
    So a kid is looking for the foreigner...
[18:04] (Flashback) Sasama
    But on whose orders?
[18:11] (Flashback) Junna
    Blue hoodie, blond with glasses...
[18:19] (Flashback) Junna
    I found the foreigner!
[18:20] (Flashback) Junna
    Now he'll let me borrow the drone!
[18:23] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Are you a ninja?
[18:27] (Flashback) Junna
    I'm not a ninja. I'm playing hide-and-seek.
[18:29] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Hide and... seek?
[18:32] (Flashback) Junna
    I found you, Mr. Foreigner, so you lose!
[18:36] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I lost?
[18:37] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Yes, I have indeed lost. I even used a gun...
[18:42] (Flashback) Foreigner
    But I wasn't able to defeat
    a ninja in urban combat.
[18:46] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Could you please bring me
    my matsugo no mizu?
[18:50] (Flashback) Junna
    What the heck is that?
    Some water from Matsuko?
[18:53] (Flashback) Foreigner
    No, it's... a last drink of water before dying.
[18:59] (Flashback) Junna
    Sure, here you go.
[19:05] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I feel alive again.
[19:07] (Flashback) Junna
    Dying and reviving! You sure keep busy.
[19:10] (Flashback) Foreigner
    How old are you?
[19:15] (Flashback) Junna
    I'm ten.
[19:17] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Ten years old...
[19:19] (Flashback) Foreigner
    My daughter was just born recently.
[19:24] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I wanted to watch her grow up.
[19:28] (Flashback) Foreigner
    But... I doubt I'll ever see her again.
[19:31] (Flashback) Junna
    Why?
[19:32] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Because I failed my mission.
[19:36] (Flashback) Foreigner
    The ninja won't let me escape...
[19:39] (Flashback) Foreigner
    And my employers won't forgive my failure.
[19:44] (Flashback) Junna
    But why?! Come on! It'll be okay!
[19:47] (Flashback) Junna
    Just leave it to me!
[19:49] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Th-Thank you, but...
    please don't shake the shrine.
[19:57] (Flashback) Kato
    It's good to see you again, Sasama-san.
[20:01] (Flashback) Sasama
    Kato... Want some breast milk?
[20:04] (Flashback) Kato
    No, thank you.
[20:08] (Flashback) Kato
    Sasama-san...
[20:10] (Flashback) Kato
    Why did you step down?
[20:14] (Flashback) Sasama
    The fighting in Timbuktu was nasty.
[20:18] (Flashback) Sasama
    Surrounded on all sides,
    kilometers deep. Nowhere to run.
[20:22] (Flashback) Sasama
    Kato, you're one of the few
    people I trust to watch my back.
[20:28] (Flashback) Sasama
    I thought having you guys at my back
    would let me move forward,
[20:32] (Flashback) Sasama
    so I opened the doors in front of me.
[20:35] (Flashback) Sasama
    I kept doing that, and after every door,
    there were only more doors. Never an exit.
[20:42] (Flashback) Sasama
    It was depressing, Kato.
[20:45] (Flashback) Sasama
    Have some breast milk. It's nutritious.
[20:49] (Flashback) Kato
    Is this your way of criticizing
    the organization?
[20:54] (Flashback) Kato
    First Class Ninja Sasama.
[20:58] (Flashback) Sasama
    Former, actually.
[21:01] (Flashback) Sasama
    It's been seventy years
    since the war ended,
[21:03] (Flashback) Sasama
    but the Prime Minister still hasn't made
    use of his priority command over us.
[21:10] (Flashback) Sasama
    There are 290,000 police officers,
    230,000 JSDF officers,
[21:15] (Flashback) Sasama
    and 200,000 of us.
[21:18] (Flashback) Sasama
    So how is it that over 90%
    of our numbers are in Japan?
[21:22] (Flashback) Sasama
    Why is it that the top of the Chunin class
    have been recalled from overseas duty,
[21:27] (Flashback) Sasama
    and stuck working on missions
    inside our borders?
[21:31] (Flashback) Sasama
    Why is a militarized organization of our size
    not under civilian control by the government?
[21:38] (Flashback) Kato
    UN.
[21:41] (Flashback) Sasama
    Exactly. All of these questions
    lead to the same thing.
[21:52] (Flashback) Sasama
    Under Ninja.
[22:02] Kato
    Gone already.
[22:04] Kato
    But things are starting to get dicey...
[22:12] Ozu
    Something wrong, Kato?
[22:16] Kato
    No... It's nothing.
SIGN    Episode 3: "Boobs: So Close, Yet So Far"
[23:55] Kuro
    Ono is apparently the 70th most
    common family name in Japan.
[23:58] Ono
    That's so half-assed...
    Makes me wanna say, "Oh, no!"
[24:02] Kuro
    Wow. That was annoying.
    I think I'll tell her about the bra.
[24:04] Ono
    Please, not that!
[24:06] Kuro
    See, that was when you
    should've said, "Oh, no!"
[24:08] Ono
    You're a funny guy.

E3 - Boobs: So Close, Yet So Far
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:17] Hachiya
    An eye gouge and an arm break...
    Kuro-san is pretty ruthless.
[00:22] Hachiya
    From the sound of it,
    I think her arm's shattered.
[00:26] Hibi
    Nah. He had her joint over the rail,
    so it's probably dislocated.
[00:30] Hibi
    If he was serious,
    he'd have snapped her neck.
[00:33] Hachiya
    Well, I'm going to take her
    to the nurse's office.
[00:37] Hibi
    You know Seduction Arts?
[00:41] Hachiya
    That's so dated.
[00:42] Hachiya
    The term is "Grade-2 Operator
    in Romantic Entanglement Actions."
[00:52] Eita
    Yamada-san... Did you just hear
    a scream coming from up above?
[00:56] Kuro
    That voice...
SIGN    September 9th
[00:58] Kuro
    Eita?
SIGN    July 24th
[01:03] Narration
    On that summer evening,
[01:05] Narration
    the boy found himself standing in a daze
    in front of the apartment building.
[01:10] Narration
    What he saw had lulled him into a trance.
[01:14] Narration
    The bra he had failed to steal
    was hanging from the wall.
[01:18] Narration
    He could sense that it was a trap.
[01:21] Narration
    But at the same time, adolescent
    fantasies were stirring in his mind.
[01:26] Narration
    If the woman this bra had
    belonged to was responsible...
[01:31] Narration
    Could she be waiting on the other side
    of the window, with no bra on at all?
[01:53] (Flashback) Kuro
    Pretty effective.
[01:56] (Flashback) Kuro
    But the batteries on
    this thing don't last long.
[01:58] (Flashback) Kuro
    Gonna be tricky figuring out
    when to use the invisibility.
SIGN    Episode 3: "Boobs: So Close, Yet So Far"
[03:35] Eita
    What just happened to me?
[03:38] Eita
    Oh, I collapsed after grabbing the bra.
[03:43] Eita
    This must be a room in
    that run-down building...
[03:47] Eita
    The question is who it belongs to.
[03:51] (Flashback) Kawado
    Hurry and put it on me.
[04:04] (Flashback) Ono
    Excuse me? Did you just sigh?
[04:07] (Flashback) Ono
    I was nice enough to bring you
    inside after I saw you out cold
[04:10] (Flashback) Ono
    with that bra in your hands!
[04:13] (Flashback) Ono
    Okay, you just clicked your tongue at me!
[04:15] (Flashback) Ono
    I know you're the underwear thief, y'know!
[04:18] (Flashback) Eita
    I'm remaining silent.
    I want legal defense present.
[04:23] (Flashback) Eita
    Until then, I'm not saying another word.
[04:25] (Flashback) Ono
    What, did they teach you
    about that at school yesterday?
[04:30] (Flashback) Kuro
    Better not sit up yet.
[04:33] (Flashback) Kuro
    You might've hit your head when you fell.
[04:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    Why'd you collapse? Does that happen often?
[04:40] (Flashback) Eita
    No... I remember there was this pain
    in my left shoulder, and then I passed out.
[04:45] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sounds like anemia.
[04:47] (Flashback) Kuro
    I may or may not have heard something
    about pickled eggplant being good for that.
[04:51] (Flashback) Kuro
    Eat.
[04:52] (Flashback) Ono
    That sounds made-up.
[04:57] (Flashback) Eita
    I don't really like pickled foods.
    Especially eggplant.
[05:01] (Flashback) Kuro
    I hear you.
[05:02] (Flashback) Kuro
    Ever since I tried the stuff Ono-san's mom
    sends him, I don't like it anymore, either.
[05:06] (Flashback) Ono
    Come on, Kuro-kun, that's just rude!
[05:09] (Flashback) Kawado
    Anyone home?
[05:11] (Flashback) Kawado
    Hey, you're drinking!
[05:14] (Flashback) Kawado
    I want in!
[05:15] (Flashback) Kawado
    Oh, right.
[05:17] (Flashback) Kawado
    Here, Ono-san. I got you
    a beer, so now we're even!
[05:21] (Flashback) Ono
    Er, you actually drank more than one, but...
[05:24] (Flashback) Kawado
    Aw, quit whining!
[05:27] (Flashback) Kawado
    So, what's with the kid?
[05:30] (Flashback) Ono
    W-Well... He's...
[05:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    He actually...
[05:36] (Flashback) Kuro
    found this bra, and went
    out of his way to deliver it.
[05:42] (Flashback) Kawado
    You did?! Well, thanks!
[05:46] (Flashback) Eita
    It's fine...
[05:47] (Flashback) Kawado
    Ooh, pickled eggplant!
[05:52] (Flashback) Kuro
    Hey, kid.
[05:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    You don't want the bra anymore?
[05:57] (Flashback) Eita
    Uh, no.
[05:59] (Flashback) Eita
    I think I'm okay now.
    Considering I almost became a criminal...
[06:03] (Flashback) Eita
    I appreciate you all not saying anything.
[06:05] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yeah, you already did break the law, though.
[06:08] (Flashback) Kuro
    What middle school do you go to, anyway?
[06:11] (Flashback) Eita
    Er, I'm actually in high school.
[06:15] (Flashback) Eita
    At Kodan High.
[06:17] (Flashback) Kuro
    Seriously? You're that old?
[06:20] (Flashback) Kuro
    You ought to know better, then.
    Maybe I should call the cops.
[06:25] (Flashback) Eita
    Wait! Please don't! I'll do anything!
[06:28] (Flashback) Kuro
    Your school... Kodan High. What's it like?
[06:32] (Flashback) Eita
    I'm not sure what you mean by that.
[06:34] (Flashback) Eita
    Plus, I haven't been going to class lately...
[06:39] (Flashback) Kuro
    Cutting classes, huh?
[06:40] (Flashback) Eita
    Yeah.
[06:41] (Flashback) Kuro
    You've got time to spare, then.
[06:45] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'm looking for a blond foreigner
    wearing a blue hoodie and glasses.
[06:50] (Flashback) Kuro
    You find him... and I'll send you this pic.
SIGN    At that time
[06:54] Sasama
    Om anichi...
[06:57] (Flashback) Sasama
    Marishiei...
[06:59] (Flashback) Sasama
    Sowaka.
SIGN    That must be ninjutsu...
SIGN    A camouflage technique, maybe.
[07:13] (Flashback) Junna
    Hey, welcome home, drone guy.
[07:15] (Flashback) Eita
    Where'd you get that from?
[07:17] (Flashback) Junna
    'Cuz you're always flying
    your drone, drone guy.
[07:20] (Flashback) Junna
    Hey, let me borrow it!
[07:23] (Flashback) Eita
    Not happening.
[07:24] (Flashback) Eita
    Anyway, did they lock you out again?
[07:28] (Flashback) Eita
    Hang on...
[07:29] (Flashback) Eita
    If you can find the blond foreigner with
    glasses, I'll let you borrow my drone.
[07:35] (Flashback) Junna
    Really?!
[07:38] (Flashback) Kid 1
    Hey, free skateboard!
[07:40] (Flashback) Kid 2
    Nice...
[07:42] (Flashback) Kid 1
    Looks like it's still good, too.
[07:44] (Flashback) Kuro
    Hey, kid.
[07:48] (Flashback) Kuro
    That's mine.
[07:50] (Flashback) Kid 1
    It's mine now. I picked it out of the trash.
[07:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    Easy there. I'm not asking you to give it away.
[08:01] (Flashback) Kuro
    How about we trade?
[08:04] (Flashback) Kuro
    It belongs to a college student.
[08:06] (Flashback) Kid 1
    Dude, we're in elementary school!
    Why would we care?
[08:10] (Flashback) Kid 2
    Y-Yeah!
[08:12] (Flashback) Kuro
    Is that right? Because it sounds like bull.
[08:16] (Flashback) Kuro
    You're old enough to get kicked out
    of the women's area at the public bath.
[08:19] (Flashback) Kuro
    That makes boobs seem so close,
    yet so far away.
[08:23] (Flashback) Kuro
    Someday, you're gonna need to unhook a bra.
[08:28] (Flashback) Kuro
    It would only benefit you to
    figure out how ahead of time.
[08:32] (Flashback) Kid 1
    Wh-What do you think?
[08:34] (Flashback) Kid 2
    I-It's your call.
[08:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    You can enjoy that skateboard right now...
[08:40] (Flashback) Kuro
    or invest in your future with this bra.
[08:44] (Flashback) Kuro
    Which is better in the long run?
SIGN    At that time
[08:48] (Flashback) Junna
    I found the foreigner!
[08:50] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Are you a ninja?
[08:54] (Flashback) Junna
    This is my house.
[09:00] (Flashback) Junna
    It's okay. They're gone.
[09:03] (Flashback) Junna
    They'd get mad if they found out.
[09:05] (Flashback) Junna
    I'm not actually supposed to be in here.
[09:08] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Then where do you sleep?
[09:12] (Flashback) Junna
    In here.
[09:13] (Flashback) Foreigner
    This is... the bathroom, though.
[09:16] (Flashback) Junna
    That's right. I'm not his daughter,
    so I have to sleep here.
SIGN    Child abuse...
SIGN    In a country as wealthy as this?
[09:26] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Junna-san, isn't it hard
    sleeping in the bath?
[09:30] (Flashback) Junna
    Not really. I'm used to it by now.
[09:33] (Flashback) Junna
    I bet you're hungry, huh?
[09:35] (Flashback) Junna
    Here! Have a cucumber.
[09:37] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Thank you.
[09:38] (Flashback) Junna
    I hate them, myself.
[10:01] (Flashback) Kawado
    Knock it off!
[10:03] (Flashback) Kawado
    What the hell? That's you, isn't it, Kuro-kun?!
[10:07] (Flashback) Kuro
    Kawado-san?
[10:09] (Flashback) Kuro
    Care to join me?
[10:11] (Flashback) Kawado
    Come on, lift me up!
[10:16] (Flashback) Kuro
    You're as heavy... as I figured.
[10:19] (Flashback) Kawado
    If you knew beforehand,
    then shut up about it.
[10:30] (Flashback) Kawado
    Well, let's drink up!
[10:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    Wait, are you treating me?
[10:37] (Flashback) Kawado
    You bring that up after opening it?
[10:41] (Flashback) Kawado
    Sure, it's my treat.
[10:47] (Flashback) Kawado
    This is like one of those bier gardens!
    Tastes better this way!
[10:53] (Flashback) Kuro
    No work today?
[10:55] (Flashback) Kawado
    That's right. It's my time of the month, so...
[10:58] (Flashback) Kuro
    I see. I'd say you earned the rest.
[11:00] (Flashback) Kawado
    You're basically in your
    apartment all the time, huh?
[11:05] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yeah. Haven't really gone
    anywhere since I moved in.
[11:09] (Flashback) Kawado
    You're a shut-in! What do
    you do for food and stuff?
[11:14] (Flashback) Kuro
    Early on, the landlady would feed me
    lunch when checking in on things...
[11:20] (Flashback) Kuro
    But she's been bedridden,
    which means I've had to improvise.
[11:25] (Flashback) Kuro
    I eat hyorogan and wild grass,
[11:28] (Flashback) Kuro
    and treat myself to small
    portions of Ono-san's rice.
[11:31] (Flashback) Kawado
    Just get a job!
[11:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    It's not as bad as "if I get a job, I lose," but...
[11:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    I do feel like I'd rather die than get a job.
[11:40] (Flashback) Kawado
    That's even worse!
[11:42] (Flashback) Kawado
    What do you do about rent and stuff, then?
[11:46] (Flashback) Kuro
    Y'know how my room's connected
    to Ono-san's through the closet?
[11:50] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'm technically staying in his guest room.
[11:56] (Flashback) Kuro
    I was looking for somewhere to move,
[11:58] (Flashback) Kuro
    when I came upon him getting mugged by
    middle schoolers in front of the station.
[12:03] (Flashback) Kuro
    I saved him, and it ended with me moving in.
[12:08] (Flashback) Kawado
    You sure sound like you've
    got enough energy for a job.
[12:13] (Flashback) Kuro
    When I think about working,
    I start feeling tired.
[12:18] (Flashback) Kuro
    So I sleep.
[12:19] (Flashback) Kawado
    Don't sleep!
[12:21] (Flashback) Kawado
    Don't you have that entrance exam
    coming up? You gonna be okay?
[12:25] (Flashback) Kuro
    Studying also makes me tired,
    so... I'm not sure.
[12:29] (Flashback) Kawado
    In that case, why do
    you want to go to school?
[12:33] (Flashback) Kawado
    Well, I guess... you could say I've got
    a nosy relative who got on my case.
[12:40] (Flashback) Kawado
    Ugh, I know what that's like.
[12:42] (Flashback) Kawado
    When I dropped out, this egghead relative
    of mine would not shut up about it!
[12:48] (Flashback) Kuro
    Why'd you drop out, Kawado-san?
[12:52] (Flashback) Kawado
    Well...
[12:57] (Flashback) Kawado
    Most people don't remember it,
[12:59] (Flashback) Kawado
    but my parents died in that mess
    near the end of February, in 2010.
[13:06] (Flashback) Kawado
    I didn't really have time
    for school after that.
[13:11] (Flashback) Kuro
    The end of February 2010...
[13:14] (Flashback) Kuro
    February 22 on the 22nd year of Heisei...
SIGN    Ni-Ni Ni Ni-Ni Incident
[13:17] (Flashback) Kuro
    The Nin-Nin-Ni Ni-Nin Incident.
    The ninja disaster.
[13:23] (Flashback) Kawado
    I gotta pee. Need to change my pad, too.
[13:26] (Flashback) Kuro
    Okay.
[13:29] (Flashback) Kuro
    Be careful on your way down.
[13:32] (Flashback) Kawado
    I know.
[13:35] (Flashback) Kawado
    I'm not gonna fall or anything!
[13:39] (Flashback) Kawado
    Easy does it...
[13:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    What the heck?
[13:56] (Flashback) Kawado
    Kuro-kun?!
[13:58] (Flashback) Kawado
    Kuro-kun! Don't move! I'll call an ambulance!
[14:03] (Flashback) Kuro
    What about the bathroom, Kawado-san?
[14:04] (Flashback) Kawado
    Too late now!
[14:10] Kuro
    It's got an airbag installed? I see.
[14:18] Rear-Ender 2
    Well, our leader's being dragged
    off by the teddy bear guy.
[14:21] Rear-Ender 2
    What do we do now?
[14:23] Rear-Ender 1
    What do you mean?
    The enemy is still in front of us.
[14:27] Rear Ender 2
    Come to think of it,
    wasn't there a girl with them?
[14:48] Rear Ender 2
    Hey, are you okay?
[14:57] Suzuki
    Surrender already.
[14:59] Suzuki
    Or the next one's aimed at your face.
    That'll leave a nasty scar.
[15:04] Kato
    Suzuki was the first to engage
    the dick-chopping foreigner, right?
[15:10] Ozu
    Yeah. She's got a ton of ninja handles.
[15:13] Ozu
    Like your student, Onikobe,
[15:16] Ozu
    she graduated from the Ninja Technical
    School's Kunoichi Program...
SIGN    September 9th
[15:19] Ozu
    at the top of her class.
SIGN    July 25th
[15:25] (Flashback) Junna
    Drone guy! Hey, drone guy!
[15:29] (Flashback) Eita
    Seriously, why do you call... me... that?
[15:34] (Flashback) Junna
    Gimme that drone!
[15:37] (Flashback) Junna
    Come on, the drone!
[15:43] (Flashback) Junna
    It's flying! It really flies!
[15:45] (Flashback) Junna
    I'll let you go next!
[15:47] (Flashback) Junna
    Do you know how to use it?
[15:48] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I've flown a few suicide drones before.
[15:52] Eita
    The blond foreigner in a
    blue hoodie and glasses...
[15:56] Eita
    I gotta call Kuro-san.
[15:59] Yoshida
    Just when I thought it
    had quieted down some...
[16:02] Yoshida
    There's that drone again.
[16:05] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Yoshida-sensei.
[16:06] (Flashback) Yoshida
    Oh, right, right.
[16:07] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Thank you so much for letting
    me see your manuscript.
[16:12] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Your depiction of the grief these ninja go
    through was so vivid. I was honestly touched.
[16:17] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Excellent work!
[16:19] (Flashback) Yoshida
    I'm glad to hear that. It's quite a relief.
[16:23] (Flashback) Suzuki
    This scene where the ninja
    are all wiped out, especially,
[16:26] (Flashback) Suzuki
    had me holding my sides in laughter.
[16:28] (Flashback) Yoshida
    Uh, that's supposed to be a tragic scene...
[16:32] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Now, I'd like to talk to you about
    a few edits I was thinking of.
[16:35] (Flashback) Yoshida
    R-Right.
[16:38] (Flashback) Hibi
    Hey!
[16:39] (Flashback) Hibi
    Crossing up upon the bypass,
    heading to paradise in first class!
[16:44] (Flashback) Hibi
    With an eye looking on the
    future, and even the past!
[16:47] (Flashback) Hibi
    And then...
[16:48] (Flashback) Taira
    Shut the fuck up and walk, baldo.
[16:51] (Flashback) Hibi
    Oh, sure.
[16:53] Hibi
    That's my master for you.
[16:54] Hibi
    He's bald himself, but he calls me,
    with my long hair, baldo.
[17:00] (Flashback) Suzuki
    First, I'd cut this part. It's just repeating
    what was on the previous page.
[17:04] (Flashback) Yoshida
    B-But that's...
[17:06] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Let's drop this entire chapter, too.
[17:09] (Flashback) Yoshida
    Wh-Whoa, that's basically
    a rewrite at that point!
[17:12] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Oh, this can go, too.
[17:15] Suzuki
    And this scene at the beginning...
    I'd like you to rewrite that.
[17:15] (Flashback) Yoshida
    What happened to all that praise?
[17:20] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Oh, sorry, the office is calling.
SIGN    Capture the foreigner.
    2-X-X Nishiki-cho in Nerima City.
    Murayama Flats.
SIGN    Understood
[17:28] Suzuki
    Sensei, a question...
SIGN    Roger that
SIGN    Roger that
[17:31] (Flashback) Suzuki
    What's the name of this slu—
    I mean, apartment building?
[17:36] (Flashback) Yoshida
    It's Murayama Flats.
SIGN    Capture the foreigner.
    2-X-X Nishiki-cho in Nerima City.
    Murayama Flats.
[17:41] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Sorry, my boss has urgent business for me.
[17:46] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Please have the corrections ready
    before 3:00 PM tomorrow.
[17:48] (Flashback) Yoshida
    W-W-Wait! There's no way!
[17:51] (Flashback) Suzuki
    If you'll excuse me.
[17:55] (Flashback) Yoshida
    W-Wait...
[18:03] Suzuki
    Yoshida-sensei.
[18:05] Suzuki
    He's so anxious and hunched over.
[18:09] Suzuki
    He'll probably be up all night
    with those corrections.
[18:12] Suzuki
    Good luck. I'll see you again tomorrow.
SIGN    Cigarettes
[18:16] (Flashback) Taira
    Pops, gimme some smokes and matches.
[18:19] (Flashback) Owner
    Store's not even open anymore.
    You should head on out of here.
[18:23] (Flashback) Taira
    Don't be like that! Help a guy out.
[18:25] (Flashback) Owner
    Who the hell gets their orders from
    color-coded matches in this day and age?
[18:30] (Flashback) Owner
    These days, there's those Marishitens
    and that Escape thing...
[18:34] (Flashback) Owner
    A buncha fancy gizmos with
    old-fashioned names stuck on 'em.
[18:37] (Flashback) Owner
    Which leaves guys like us
    treated like antiques!
[18:41] (Flashback) Taira
    I happen to like antiques, myself.
[18:44] (Flashback) Taira
    The thing about tech is you can't
    rely on it in the heat of the moment,
[18:48] (Flashback) Taira
    when your life is on the line.
[18:50] (Flashback) Hibi
    I hear the cheers, they come at me for years!
[18:54] (Flashback) Taira
    Come on, Hibi, let's go.
[18:55] (Flashback) Hibi
    Where to?
[18:58] (Flashback) Taira
    Time for your first mission
    at Murayama Flats.
[19:01] (Flashback) Taira
    Consider everyone you run into an enemy.
[19:04] (Flashback) Hibi
    Hell yeah. Finally some combat.
[19:11] Suzuki
    The target is on the shared balcony
    on the second floor...
[19:24] (Flashback) Junna
    Hey, let me see it already!
[19:36] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Pardon me!
[19:40] (Flashback) Junna
    Ow...
[19:45] (Flashback) Junna
    Hey! What the heck was that?
[19:47] (Flashback) Suzuki
    You okay? Any injuries?
[19:49] (Flashback) Junna
    Yeah! I skinned my knee!
[19:52] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Sorry about that. But civilian
    casualties come with the job.
[19:56] (Flashback) Suzuki
    If you want to file a complaint,
[19:58] (Flashback) Suzuki
    submit it to the local
    courthouse within 30 days.
[20:02] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Not that it'll matter.
[20:04] (Flashback) Suzuki
    You're a high schooler, so you ought
    to understand what's going on.
[20:07] (Flashback) Suzuki
    If you want to avoid trouble,
    keep that mouth zipped.
[20:10] (Flashback) Eita
    I-I won't say a word!
[20:13] (Flashback) Suzuki
    That drone of yours has
    really complicated things.
[20:17] (Flashback) Suzuki
    And I had an appointment
    at the beautician later...
[20:19] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Now I'm gonna be late.
[20:21] (Flashback) Eita
    I-I'm sorry, but... I also
    have no idea what's going on.
[20:28] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Well, I'll still win in the end.
[20:48] (Flashback) Foreigner
    She vanished?!
[20:50] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Damn it!
[21:27] Suzuki
    He's had electrocution conditioning.
[21:30] Suzuki
    I screwed up.
[21:33] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Was there bulletproof gel in her shirt?
[21:38] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Is that enough to block .22 LR rounds?
[21:43] Suzuki
    If hitting his heart with the taser won't
    work, I'll have to aim for his head.
[21:48] Suzuki
    I'll intercept his shot with my hand and
    then redirect it to avoid a critical wound.
[21:54] Suzuki
    I am not dying here.
[21:57] Foreigner
    Her movements... She's not begging for mercy.
[22:00] Foreigner
    Are ninja that fixated on survival?
[22:05] (Flashback) Hibi
    Yo, yo, is someone playing with my yo-yo?
[22:11] (Flashback) Hibi
    Damn, you both look like shit.
[22:14] (Flashback) Hibi
    You pick a fight with the wrong person?
[22:19] (Flashback) Hibi
    Well, the star's here now.
    So where's my applause?
SIGN    Episode 4: "Do You Know What the Ninja Code Says?"
[23:55] Kuro
    Suzuki is the second most common family
    name in Japan. You got me beat.
[23:59] Suzuki
    Do you really care that much?
[24:01] Kuro
    Isn't it nice to be highly ranked?
[24:02] Kuro?
    There are 1,700,000 Suzukis across the—
[24:06] Suzuki
    Let me stop you right there!
[24:07] Suzuki
    And damn, you must really love Jump.

E4 - Do You Know What the Ninja Code Says?
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:06] Terrorist
    Yeah, I know.
[00:07] Terrorist
    I'll take those yankees down with me.
[00:12] Terrorist
    Hm?
SIGN    Hey. What's going on?
SIGN    Hey!
[00:25] Terrorist
    Shit!
[00:32] (Flashback) Captain
    Freeze!
[00:34] Delta 1
    Shit, what the hell is this?
[00:37] Captain
    It's a sword.
[00:38] Captain
    Look carefully.
[00:40] Captain
    His thumb for pressing the phone's
    detonation button and his head
[00:43] Captain
    got slashed off by a sword.
[00:46] Captain
    Nobody else can do this but ninja.
[00:51] (Flashback) Onikobe
    Good to hear from you again,
    Ninja Chief Kato.
[00:54] Kato
    Sorry to bother you mid-mission.
[00:56] (Flashback) Onikobe
    Not at all. I just finished.
[00:57] Kato
    I'll get right to the point.
[00:59] Kato
    What version of Marishiten
    are you currently outfitted with?
[01:03] (Flashback) Onikobe
    Sir. It's a Marishiten 3.5,
[01:06] (Flashback) Onikobe
    official designation: Custom Powered
    Active Camouflage Mk 10, Ninja Chief Kato.
[01:13] (Flashback) Kato
    I see. Very good.
[01:15] Onikobe
    Yes, sir. If you'll excuse me.
[01:18] Kato
    Then the Marishiten that Kumogakure
    has is the latest model...
[01:23] Kato
    Does that mean this is where
    the front line for this war is?
[01:28] (Flashback) Hibi
    Damn, you both look like shit.
[01:32] (Flashback) Hibi
    Well, the star's here now.
    So where's my applause?
[01:44] Foreigner
    Another one?
[01:46] Suzuki
    Good!
[01:48] Suzuki
    He can shoot me in the rear,
    but that won't be a fatal shot.
[01:53] Suzuki
    Better to regroup.
[01:56] (Flashback) Hibi
    Well, it's one-on-one now,
    so how about you—
[02:10] (Flashback) Hibi
    What was I gonna say again?
[02:13] Foreigner
    What are these ninja fully capable of?!
SIGN    Episode 4: "Do You Know What the Ninja Code Says?"
[04:09] (Flashback) Junna
    Mr. Foreigner!
[04:12] Suzuki
    Multiple shinobi on the same mission...
[04:15] Suzuki
    What's command trying to do
    by having us compete here?
[04:18] Suzuki
    Well, speculation won't get me anywhere.
[04:21] Suzuki
    And if the alternative is getting
    chewed out by my teacher...
[04:24] Suzuki
    I'd rather help the target.
[04:30] (Flashback) Hibi
    You look wiped already.
    Might as well give up.
[04:43] (Flashback) Hibi
    What now? Is the chick from
    before flying that thing?
[04:46] Foreigner
    Who's flying it? The woman?
[04:50] Foreigner
    Then they aren't working together?
[04:53] (Flashback) Hibi
    Well, whatever.
    Two-on-one's funner odds anyway.
[04:56] (Flashback) Hibi
    I'll smash the drone while I'm at it.
[04:59] (Flashback) Eita
    No!
[05:01] (Flashback) Eita
    Please don't do that!
[05:05] (Flashback) Hibi
    Who the hell are you?
SIGN    Nishiki-cho 2-chome Neighborhood Association
[05:10] (Flashback) Ozu
    Huh? You're on this, too, Taira-san?
[05:13] (Flashback) Ozu
    Y'know, you're not supposed to
    smoke on the street in Nerima ward.
[05:20] (Flashback) Taira
    I don't get what the bosses
    are thinking here, Ozu.
[05:24] (Flashback) Ozu
    Do you really need to know?
[05:26] (Flashback) Ozu
    We're better off just busying
    ourselves with the work.
[05:32] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    You two need to realize that if you
    turn your back on the enemy in war,
[05:36] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    it will cost you your life.
[05:38] (Flashback) Taira
    Captai—
[05:40] (Flashback) Taira
    Er, Sasama-san.
[05:43] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    You runts want some breast milk?
[05:46] (Flashback) Ozu
    Sasama-san, are you trying to say that
    this is a war... and you're our enemy?
[05:51] (Flashback) Shimada
    Ozu, have you forgotten that in our world,
[05:56] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    "to know" and "to die" may
    as well mean the same thing?
[06:01] (Flashback) Taira
    Sasama-san, we're just grunts.
[06:05] (Flashback) Taira
    We can't go through life
    without getting curious.
[06:14] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    If nothing else, you punks
    talk a big game now...
[06:21] (Flashback) Kuro
    Huh? It's going into an
    apartment building's lot.
[06:30] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Aw, what the fuck is this?!
[06:34] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Junna! Why are you outside?! Huh?!
[06:37] (Flashback) Junna
    I... I...
[06:39] Foreigner
    This man is her father?
[06:43] (Flashback) Junna
    I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
[06:47] (Flashback) Hibi
    Civilians, huh? That's a pain.
[06:51] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    I told you to stay your ass inside
    when you get home from school!
[06:55] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Don't you see this masked freak
    and this foreigner out here?!
[06:59] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    How many times do I have to tell you
    to stop making me worry like this?!
[07:04] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Do you need another lesson, is that it?!
[07:08] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    One shot!
[07:10] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Two shots!
[07:12] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Three shots!
[07:15] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Four shots!
[07:19] (Flashback) Junna
    I'm sorry... I'm sorry...
[07:22] (Flashback) Hibi
    Who the hell is this guy?
    Maybe I should just take him down, too.
[07:27] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    You listening to me, damn it?!
[07:36] (Flashback) Hibi
    Huh? What? What the...
[07:43] (Flashback) Hibi
    This is...
[07:48] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Junna!
[08:04] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Hands off the civvies, okay?
[08:18] (Flashback) Hibi
    That was Kuro.
[08:21] (Flashback) Hibi
    Come on! Show yourself!
[08:30] (Flashback) Hibi
    Damn it, that hurt, man!
[08:37] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    Wh-What the hell?!
SIGN    You really do deserve to die.
[08:41] (Flashback) Junna Stepdad
    I... I don't know what you're saying!
[08:47] (Flashback) Junna
    Daddy!
SIGN    Go and live.
[09:08] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Ninja...
[09:32] (Flashback) Taira
    So, who took him down?
[09:39] (Flashback) Taira
    Already gone?
[09:47] (Flashback) Kato
    Are you sure about this? You need
    to be on the scene to claim the credit.
[09:52] (Flashback) Kuro
    Well... it seems like a pain, so...
SIGN    September 9th 12:46 p.m.
[10:05] Eita
    Yamada-san...
[10:06] Eita
    Did you just hear a scream
    coming from up above?
[10:11] Eita
    Yamada-san?
[10:13] Yamada
    Huh? Did you say something?
[10:23] Suzuki
    Surrender already.
[10:25] Suzuki
    Or the next one's aimed at your face.
    That'll leave a nasty scar.
[10:33] Hibi
    The whole group's been subdued.
[10:36] Hibi
    Wait. I didn't get to do anything.
SIGN    Nurse's Office
[10:42] Hachiya
    There. That should do it.
[10:47] Hachiya
    Sorry about this. Those people
    I'm with are kind of crazy...
[10:50] Hachiya
    I don't really know how to deal with them.
[10:54] Mako
    Why'd you help me? I'm your enemy.
[11:00] Hachiya
    I've been... curious about you for a while now.
[11:12] Hachiya
    You always wear that makeup...
    and you're always on your own, right?
[11:19] Mako
    I don't need friends.
[11:21] Hachiya
    That's kumadori makeup, right? From kabuki?
[11:25] Mako
    You know about kumadori?
[11:27] Hachiya
    Well, yeah!
[11:29] Hachiya
    The other two just had ganguro-style
    makeup... but not you.
[11:35] Hachiya
    I think you have a complex
    about the way you look.
[11:41] Mako
    I don't want a lecture from you.
[11:44] Hachiya
    You want people to believe the kumadori
    makeup is meant to show you're the leader...
[11:49] Hachiya
    But I think otherwise.
[11:51] Hachiya
    We infiltrated the school, but you
    made really obvious contact...
[11:55] Hachiya
    and lost on purpose, right?
[11:59] Hachiya
    The fact that you lost isn't what I care about.
[12:02] Hachiya
    It's your makeup that I find interesting.
[12:10] Hachiya
    Is it okay if I come over there?
[12:15] Mako
    It's fine...
[12:24] Mako
    What?
[12:26] Hachiya
    You have such pretty, straight hair.
[12:31] Hachiya
    Mine's naturally curly. When it
    gets humid, it's just the worst.
[12:35] Hachiya
    I've always wished I had straight hair.
[12:37] Mako
    I-It's not that great.
[12:39] Hachiya
    You're wearing red kumadori makeup.
[12:44] Hachiya
    Villains wear blue.
[12:46] Hachiya
    Oni and yokai wear brown.
[12:49] Hachiya
    But red... is the color for the protagonist.
[12:53] Hachiya
    You might not realize it,
    but you want to be the star.
[12:57] Hachiya
    I think maybe you want people
    to pay more attention to you.
[13:03] Hachiya
    Sorry, I didn't mean to get so analytical.
[13:06] Hachiya
    I just want to get to know you better, so...
[13:10] Hachiya
    "It's true!"
[13:11] Hachiya
    "This runt loves to run his mouth!"
[13:15] Hachiya
    "Better watch yourself.
    He's trying to be slick and win you over!"
[13:20] Hachiya
    S-Stupid! Don't say weird stuff like that.
[13:23] Hachiya
    "It's the truth, though!"
[13:25] Hachiya
    Stop it!
[13:27] Hachiya
    "Hey, you smiled for the first time!"
[13:30] Hachiya
    "I'm this guy's master."
[13:32] Hachiya
    You've got that backwards!
    Sorry for all the weirdos around me.
[13:36] Hachiya
    "I'm not a weirdo!"
[13:39] Hachiya
    So, as you can see, I can barely
    talk without a teddy bear.
[13:45] Hachiya
    I'm like you. Trapped inside my own shell.
[13:50] Hachiya
    I'm sure you know this already,
    but in my organization,
[13:54] Hachiya
    they kidnap small children
    and call it "recruitment,"
[13:58] Hachiya
    turning them into completely
    loyal killing machines.
[14:04] Hachiya
    I'm no different.
[14:06] Hachiya
    The only thing I have from before
    I was kidnapped is this teddy bear.
[14:12] Hachiya
    He's like a part of me.
[14:19] Hachiya
    But... I'm willing to put him down...
[14:23] Hachiya
    if you're willing to take your makeup off.
[14:28] Hachiya
    "Aw, come on."
[14:32] Mako
    You don't need to do that...
[14:36] Hachiya
    I want...
[14:38] Hachiya
    to see the real you.
[14:46] Mako
    Okay...
[14:56] Kato
    This student of yours, Hachiya Shion...
    He didn't engage the foreigner.
[15:02] Kato
    Seems to have just sat back and watched.
[15:06] Ozu
    Hachiya-kun isn't exactly a typical genin.
[15:12] Kato
    So, how exactly was the dick-slicing
    foreigner dealt with, anyway?
[15:18] Ozu
    That's right, you weren't there...
SIGN    September 9th
SIGN    July 25th
[15:34] (Flashback) Taira
    Out of the three you fought,
    who was the strongest?
[15:39] (Flashback) Foreigner
    The conditions were different each time,
[15:43] (Flashback) Foreigner
    so it's hard to make a generalization.
[15:45] (Flashback) Foreigner
    But the one at the end, who was waiting
    inside the vehicle, was the scariest.
[15:53] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I sensed another, too, but they never showed.
[15:59] (Flashback) Foreigner
    I wonder what that was about...
[16:05] Ozu
    He actually realized my
    student was there, too.
[16:11] (Flashback) Taira
    Gotta say, you can walk pretty well,
    what with the bag and all.
[16:21] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    Okay. You can take it off him now.
[16:27] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    And help me out of this thing, would you?
[16:30] (Flashback) Ozu
    You sure?
[16:33] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    It's hot, damn it!
[16:36] (Flashback) Ozu
    What was the passcode again?
[16:39] (Flashback) Sasama (M)
    It's 0355. It sounds like
    "old man go go" out loud.
[16:43] (Flashback) Ozu
    Let's see... 0355.
[17:02] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    I should've said so earlier, but...
[17:05] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    The name's Sasama. It's a pleasure.
[17:08] (Flashback) Ozu
    If it's too hot, why wear that thing at all?
[17:11] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Oh, come on.
[17:13] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    The Ninja Lab has been on my ass
    about testing a new Marishiten beta.
[17:18] (Flashback) Ozu
    You're already an urban legend, y'know.
[17:21] (Flashback) Ozu
    Folks on the Internet were posting
    about an old man with no torso.
[17:24] (Flashback) Ozu
    Though I'm sure intel has
    already deleted the videos...
SIGN    He vanished?!
SIGN    But just the torso?!
[17:30] (Flashback) Taira
    It's the lab's fault for making
    a buncha half-baked crap.
[17:33] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    We're not supposed to use any full-spec
    Marishiten inside Japan's borders.
[17:38] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    It's part of our deal with the police.
[17:41] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    We've got plenty of enemies,
    at home and abroad.
[17:46] (Flashback) Ozu
    Yeah, if someone had a full-spec model,
[17:48] (Flashback) Ozu
    they could waltz in through the front door
    of the Prime Minister's residence
[17:51] (Flashback) Ozu
    and do whatever they wanted.
[17:54] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Our already limited freedom in Japan
[17:58] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    is the result of the trust
    we've built with the police.
[18:01] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Part of that is limiting
    the arsenal we utilize.
[18:05] (Flashback) Taira
    Is the Ministry of Defense
    the problem, then?
SIGN    Ministry of
    Defense
[18:08] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    On the surface, at least, we're in a honeymoon
    phase with the current administration.
[18:12] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    They're working with the Ninja Lab
    to co-develop weapons, even.
[18:15] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    The issue is the faction descended from the
    old Imperial Army's Nakano Military School...
[18:19] (Flashback) Taira
    That'd be the Ministry of Health, Labour and
    Welfare's Rear Support Maneuvers Division 2.
[18:24] (Flashback) Ozu
    They're the ones called
    the Rear-Enders, right?
[18:27] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    That's what they publicly
    call their action teams, yeah.
[18:29] (Flashback) Ozu
    And you think the prime minister
    is giving them orders in secret?
[18:34] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Do I really need to spell it out?
[18:36] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    If you sit in the central seat of power,
[18:38] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    you're gonna resent a secondary
    layer being out there.
[18:42] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Which is an opportunity for our true enemy,
[18:44] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    who is encouraging these rivalries,
    and plotting the government's downfall...
[18:48] (Flashback) Taira
    And that's Under Ninja.
[18:58] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    To go underground for the 70-plus years since
    the war while dodging our intel network,
[19:04] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    you'd need the resources of an
    organization bigger than ours.
[19:08] (Flashback) Ozu
    You think they're making their move?
[19:10] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    I'd say it's our job to find that out.
[19:14] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    The old Imperial Army Nakano School had
    two branch schools: the Futamata School and...
[19:19] (Flashback) Taira
    The Egota School in Nerima.
[19:21] (Flashback) Ozu
    And where the Egota School used to stand...
[19:25] (Flashback) Ozu
    is Kodan High School.
[19:28] (Flashback) Ozu
    I get it now. This ties
    the whole thing together.
[19:32] (Flashback) Ozu
    And that's why the genin
    are being sent to infiltrate it.
[19:41] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    What is it? You look like
    you've got something to say.
[19:45] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Why would you talk about
    all of this in front of me?
[19:52] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Even if you're going to kill me,
    it seems careless.
[19:59] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    You don't seem to understand.
[20:02] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    We're talking about it because
    you're already one of us.
[20:07] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Even if they weren't armed
    with lethal weapons,
[20:10] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    you still managed to fight on
    even terms against two genin.
[20:14] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Our international department wants you.
[20:19] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    As of today, you are shinobi.
[20:31] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    And do you know what the shinobi code says?
[20:34] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    Your employers, your family, your old life...
[20:39] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    You must cast it all away.
SIGN    Oh, it's you.
SIGN    I'm surprised you're alive.
SIGN    Huh?
SIGN    You were able to infiltrate the ninja?
SIGN    No one has ever managed that before.
SIGN    Excellent!
SIGN    Whoa.
SIGN    You all right?
SIGN    Y-You... betrayed us...
SIGN    Hey, hey,
SIGN    these are gonna be your last words.
SIGN    Better choose them carefully.
SIGN    Aw, he's done for already...
[21:37] Shimada
    This is Shimada with the
    international department.
[21:39] Shimada
    Your daughter is safe.
[21:43] (Flashback) Shimada
    We're going to dismantle your organization.
[21:48] (Flashback) Shimada
    If you want to see your daughter,
[21:50] (Flashback) Shimada
    you need to rendezvous ASAP
    and participate in the operation.
[21:53] (Flashback) Shimada
    That is all.
[22:10] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    What's the matter?
[22:12] (Flashback) Sasama (F)
    You've got a mission, right? Then get going.
[22:19] (Flashback) Foreigner
    Yes, ma'am!
SIGN    Episode 5: "Kumogakure Is Within the Top 10 Common Family Names in Japan (Lying)"
[23:55] Kuro
    Looks like Hibi is somewhere around the 1500s
    for the most common family names in Japan.
[23:58] Hibi
    You giving me shit about my name?
[24:00] Kuro
    Of course not.
[24:01] Kuro
    "Miracle" being written
    with the kanji "Kiseki"
[24:03] Kuro
    is something I tell people about when
    I drink with them, and they love it.
[24:05] Hibi
    So my name's gone viral, huh?
[24:07] Kuro
    Wow, he has no idea
    they were laughing at him.

E5 - Kumogakure Is Within the Top 10 Common Family Names in Japan (Lying)
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Noguchi
    Lunch is taking forever.
[00:04] Noguchi
    I had no idea being on
    the outs sucked this hard.
[00:07] Noguchi
    And it's not like I can get the groups
    I used to look down on to accept me...
[00:16] Sato
    I can't think of anyone.
[00:19] Sato
    But I really wanna talk to someone...
[00:23] Sato
    A boy with no torso.
[00:26] Sato
    I wanna tell someone about it. But...
[00:31] Sato
    If they think I'm some kinda occult maniac,
[00:33] Sato
    I'll be even more of an outcast
    than I already am.
[00:39] Noguchi
    That plain girl from class...
[00:41] Sato
    That flashy girl from class...
[00:44] Noguchi
    What're you up to?
[00:45] Sato
    Uh, well, outside...
[00:48] Sato
    I mean, not right now, but before...
[00:52] Noguchi
    Huh? Kuro-kun?
[00:56] Sato
    Oh, Kumogakure-kun?
[00:59] Sato
    You call the transfer
    student by his given name?
[01:02] Sato
    Do you know him?
[01:03] Noguchi
    No, not exactly!
[01:06] Noguchi
    I mean, I guess you could
    say that, technically...
SIGN    September 9th
SIGN    July 27th
[01:15] Kuro
    Transfer exams, huh?
[01:18] Kuro
    I really hate having to go to school.
[01:22] Kuro
    Maybe I'm better off getting ready to die.
[01:26] Kuro
    A teacher was supposed to be waiting,
    but I don't see anyone.
[01:31] Kuro
    'Kay, better leave, then.
[01:32] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Excuse me. You're in the way.
SIGN    Episode 5: "Kumogakure Is Within the Top 10 Common Family Names in Japan (Lying)"
[03:10] Noguchi
    Hey, isn't it kinda hot to wear
    a hoodie underneath your blazer?
[03:14] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yeah, it is.
[03:16] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Then why not take it off?
[03:19] (Flashback) Kuro
    Don't wanna.
[03:20] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Man, you're kinda annoying.
[03:23] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Are you—
[03:24] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Oh, Noguchi.
[03:25] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Let's start your extra lessons.
[03:27] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    And you must be the transfer student...
    Kamikakushi, was it?
[03:32] (Flashback) Kuro
    Kumogakure, actually.
[03:34] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Kumogakure? Never met someone
    with that name before.
[03:38] (Flashback) Kuro
    It's not that rare.
[03:40] (Flashback) Kuro
    They make a ranking of the most
    common family names every year,
[03:43] (Flashback) Kuro
    and it's always in the top ten.
[03:44] (Flashback) Noguchi
    What? It is?!
[03:47] (Flashback) Kuro
    It's common knowledge. Ask anyone.
[03:49] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Oh, come on, now...
[03:51] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    You can't just lie about stuff like that.
[03:53] (Flashback) Noguchi
    It was a lie?! That is so annoying!
[03:57] (Flashback) Kuro
    Wait, it was a lie?
[03:59] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    You're asking me?
[04:01] (Flashback) Kuro
    Noguchi, the teacher says not to lie.
[04:04] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    I was telling you that, actually.
[04:08] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Can we drop this subject?
    I'm getting confused.
[04:14] (Flashback) Homeroom teach
    One other thing...
[04:15] (Flashback) Homeroom teach
    If you end up enrolling here,
    you'll need to shave your facial hair.
[04:20] (Flashback) Kuro
    I actually would like to, sir...
[04:23] (Flashback) Kuro
    But my mother works in
    the "hospitality" industry,
[04:26] (Flashback) Kuro
    and she has a monopoly on all our
    devices for removing body hair.
[04:30] (Flashback) Kuro
    She never lets me use them.
[04:34] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Uh... I-I see.
[04:37] (Flashback) Noguchi
    What's your mom do? I've been thinking
    about getting into that stuff.
[04:40] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Whoa, now...
[04:42] (Flashback) Kuro
    She does outcalls.
[04:43] (Flashback) Kuro
    She's pretty open about her work,
    so you can ask her about it.
[04:46] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Noguchi, you need to focus on your extra
    lessons so you can improve your test scores,
[04:51] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    or you might actually get held back.
[04:54] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Your livelihood is on the line.
[04:57] (Flashback) Noguchi
    How am I supposed to know what I wanna
    do with my life when I'm not even 18?
[05:09] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Uh, Kumogakure-kun? Go ahead and sit down.
[05:13] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Dude, you're creeping me out.
[05:15] (Flashback) Kuro
    Don't mind me.
[05:22] (Flashback) Kuro
    This'll do.
[05:23] (Flashback) Noguchi
    After all that?! Why so close?
[05:26] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Okay, Noguchi, let's get
    your lessons taken care of.
[05:29] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    As for you, feel free to start
    with English, Japanese, or math.
[05:33] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Let me know when you're done.
[05:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    Okay.
[05:38] Kuro
    Just like Hachiya said...
[05:42] (Flashback) Hachiya
    Pardon me.
[05:44] (Flashback) Ono
    Who in the world are you?!
[05:47] (Flashback) Hachiya
    My name's Hachiya Shion.
[05:49] (Flashback) Hachiya
    It's a pleasure to make your acquie—
    er, your acquaintance.
[05:54] (Flashback) Ono
    Hey! No shoes in here!
[05:57] (Flashback) Ono
    "Shut up, dickhead!"
[05:59] (Flashback) Ono
    These are for all of you.
[06:01] (Flashback) Kawado
    Hey, how thoughtful!
[06:03] (Flashback) Hachiya
    That'll be 500 yen apiece.
[06:05] (Flashback) Ono
    You're charging? And highway robbery...
[06:08] (Flashback) Kuro
    So. You need something?
[06:11] (Flashback) Ono
    Th-That's right!
    What are you even doing here?
[06:14] (Flashback) Hachiya
    "Pipe down, dickhead!"
SIGN    I was at the scene of the encounter  with the foreigner yesterday.
SIGN    During your exam tomorrow,  pay attention to the floor.
SIGN    I actually did sense  someone else was around.
SIGN    And I appreciate the help.
[06:33] (Flashback) Hachiya
    My intention was to finish off the foreigner
[06:37] (Flashback) Hachiya
    after he was exhausted from the fight
    at the apartment building...
[06:41] (Flashback) Hachiya
    But because of you, my first
    battle never came to be,
[06:44] (Flashback) Hachiya
    causing my master embarrassment,
    which I deeply regret.
[06:51] (Flashback) Hachiya
    Oh, that'll be 2,500 yen.
[06:53] (Flashback) Ono
    Wait, I have to pay?!
[06:56] (Flashback) Hachiya
    Kumogakure Kuro-kun.
[06:59] (Flashback) Hachiya
    I'll be waiting at Kodan High School.
[07:03] Kuro
    The answers are on the floor.
[07:05] Kuro
    "Japanese"... This must cover that section.
[07:09] Homeroom Teacher
    After the fall of the Kamakura shogunate
[07:09] Kuro
    Guess I'll fill in the answers,
    and with the leftover time,
[07:11] Homeroom Teacher
    came the Kenmu era and its
    new governing structure.
[07:13] Kuro
    I'll go back and add enough mistakes
    to make it seem natural.
[07:16] Homeroom Teacher
    The samurai class at the time
    rebelled against this,
[07:18] Homeroom Teacher
    and that became known as the Nakasendai War.
[07:21] Homeroom Teacher
    Then...
[07:24] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Ew! Ew!
[07:26] (Flashback) Homeroom Teacher
    What is it, Noguchi?
[07:28] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Bugs! Everywhere!
[07:31] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Are those eggs or something?
[07:34] (Flashback) Noguchi
    There are so many and they're
    different colors and it's nasty!
[07:39] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    I think they might be rice grains, not eggs...
[07:42] (Flashback) Kuro
    Oh, those things will give
    you the nastiest rash.
[07:47] (Flashback) Kuro
    The Japanese name for them is "Pseudo-Rice."
[07:51] (Flashback) Kuro
    Pretty rare, actually,
    and their eggs are crazy toxic.
[07:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    They're set up like that, two at a time,
[07:57] (Flashback) Kuro
    so that right after birth,
    the male and female pairs
[08:00] (Flashback) Kuro
    can start reproducing immediately.
[08:04] (Flashback) Noguchi
    That's somehow even worse!
[08:07] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    D-Do bugs like that really exist?
[08:10] (Flashback) Kuro
    It's a big world, you know.
[08:12] (Flashback) Kuro
    Much bigger than what we cover in class.
[08:15] (Flashback) Kuro
    There are all kinds of bugs like that,
    which may or may not exist.
[08:19] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Well, better safe than sorry.
[08:21] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Noguchi, grab a broom.
[08:24] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Roger that!
[08:32] (Flashback) Kuro
    Oh, my eraser fell.
[08:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    Let's see...
[08:52] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Somebody touched my ass!
[08:55] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Settle down, Noguchi! There's no one
    close enough to you to have done that!
[08:59] Homeroom Teach
    Easy now, Noguchi! Deep breaths! Come on!
[09:00] Kuro
    That'll buy me a few seconds.
    Let's fill in the Japanese answers first...
[09:04] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Augh, I stepped on the eggs!
[09:10] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Honestly, why'd they have to be laid
    in the middle of a classroom?
[09:16] Kuro
    There go my English answers.
[09:18] Kuro
    I need to protect the math answers
    at my feet, at least...
[09:24] Kuro
    Ninpo: Water Escape Technique.
[09:27] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Sensei, I think maybe we
    should wrap it up for the...
[09:33] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Sensei! The floor! Look!
[09:36] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Kumogakure-kun?!
[09:37] (Flashback) Noguchi
    He totally just pissed himself!
[09:40] (Flashback) Noguchi
    I'm gonna grab a rag!
[09:42] (Flashback) Kuro
    Th-The truth is...
[09:44] (Flashback) Kuro
    I've been so nervous since yesterday...
[09:47] (Flashback) Kuro
    And it made me so thirsty,
    I drank a bunch of deep ocean water...
[09:51] (Flashback) Kuro
    And now, because of all the salt...
[09:55] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    Ocean water?
[09:57] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    And you didn't seem nervous at all before.
[10:00] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Here. Sensei, take him to the bathroom.
[10:02] (Flashback) Homeroom teach
    R-Right, I guess I should.
[10:06] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Buck up! You're a man, aren't you?
[10:09] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Didn't they used to say,
    "Boys, be ambidextrous"?
[10:12] (Flashback) Homeroom teacher
    Okay, okay...
[10:14] (Flashback) Homeroom teacher
    And it was "be ambitious."
[10:17] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sensei... I think... after what's happened...
[10:22] (Flashback) Kuro
    I don't know if I'll be able to handle
    the English and math tests...
[10:28] (Flashback) Kuro
    But I did finish the Japanese language portion...
[10:31] (Flashback) Kuro
    So is it okay if I get a bare
    minimum passing score?
[10:35] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    It's fine! Just go to the bathroom and—
[10:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'll take that as an affirmative, then.
[10:40] (Flashback) Kuro
    I've got your word.
[10:42] (Flashback) Homeroom Teach
    You scare me, son.
[10:46] (Flashback) Noguchi
    What a freak.
[10:51] Kuro
    I have to keep coming here?
[10:53] Kuro
    What a pain.
[10:58] (Flashback) Mysterious Student
    I'll be looking forward to seeing you
    during the new semester!
[11:04] (Flashback) Mysterious Student
    Kumogakure-kun!
[11:08] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Who was that?
[11:10] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Let's walk partway back together.
[11:12] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Are those...
[11:13] (Flashback) Kuro
    My "used" underwear.
[11:15] (Flashback) Kuro
    Wanna buy them?
[11:16] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Why would I?!
[11:22] (Flashback) Kuro
    Well, wanna come in?
[11:26] (Flashback) Noguchi
    We had basically no conversation on
    the way here, and now you drop that?!
[11:30] (Flashback) Kawado
    Welcome home!
[11:31] (Flashback) Kawado
    How was school?
[11:33] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Is this...
[11:35] (Flashback) Kuro
    My mother.
[11:36] (Flashback) Noguchi
    So young! Ma'am, you're
    really young and really cute!
[11:42] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Uh... so do the two of you live together?
[11:46] (Flashback) Kawado
    Why do you ask?
[11:49] (Flashback) Noguchi
    It's just... I only saw one futon, so...
[11:54] (Flashback) Noguchi
    What is this pause supposed to mean?!
[11:58] (Flashback) Kawado
    Does it surprise you?
    A young, beautiful mother like me
[12:01] (Flashback) Kawado
    and her son, at the peak of puberty,
    sleeping in the same room?
[12:06] (Flashback) Noguchi
    No, not really! Families come in all kinds.
[12:09] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Also, I never said "beautiful."
[12:13] (Flashback) Kawado
    Don't worry. Kuro sleeps on the second floor.
[12:16] (Flashback) Kuro
    So, how's the class I'm about to join?
[12:19] (Flashback) Noguchi
    What do you mean, "how"?
[12:21] (Flashback) Kuro
    Like... the number of cliques, their hierarchy...
[12:24] (Flashback) Kuro
    Individual remarkables and deplorables...
[12:26] (Flashback) Kuro
    The landscape of any bullying,
    any romantic situations...
[12:30] (Flashback) Kuro
    Any shoplifters, smokers,
    drinkers, fighters...
[12:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    An outline of any good blackmail material...
[12:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    Also, rumors. Basically anything you know.
[12:41] (Flashback) Kuro
    Now, spill, please.
[12:42] (Flashback) Noguchi
    What the hell? You are so scary.
[12:46] (Flashback) Noguchi
    I don't know how things are with the guys,
    but the girls have four main groups.
[12:50] (Flashback) Kuro
    And where do you fit in?
[12:53] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Well, before, I was in
    the most popular group...
[12:59] (Flashback) Noguchi
    But lately, a bunch of stuff has happened,
    and I'm kinda floating around.
[13:04] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Was any part of that funny?
[13:07] (Flashback) Kuro
    Any rumors about the school in general?
[13:09] (Flashback) Noguchi
    I'm trying to remember...
[13:12] (Flashback) Kawado
    Stuff like, "Someone showed porn
    to a statue of Ninomiya Kinjiro
[13:14] (Flashback) Kawado
    and it started looking hunched over."
[13:17] (Flashback) Kawado
    Damn TV won't turn on!
[13:20] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Oh, the school apparently used
    to be, like... a military base?
[13:24] (Flashback) Noguchi
    And there's a tunnel leading underground
    in the woods behind the campus.
[13:27] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Some students who went in there
    on a lark ended up going missing.
[13:32] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Also, the director is scary.
[13:35] (Flashback) Kawado
    Director?
[13:37] (Flashback) Noguchi
    He does all kinds of odd
    jobs around the school.
[13:40] Kuro
    A director...
[13:42] (Flashback) Kawado
    Hey, it's on!
[13:44] (Flashback) Kawado
    This show has been so wild lately.
    Hate to miss it!
SIGN    Me and Old Dudes
[13:49] Takachiho
    All right, you good little old dudes!
    How are you doing?
[13:53] Takachiho
    It's me, Miss Takachiho!
[13:55] Old dudes
    Where are we?
[13:57] Noguchi
    Old dudes?
[13:59] Old Dude
    How the fuck do you think we're doing?
    Where even is this?
[14:03] Takachiho
    Oh, you're the boy who's been
    a shut-in for ten years.
[14:07] Takachiho
    But lately, you've been getting violent
    with your mother, haven't you?
[14:13] Old Dude
    Do you realize how, while we waste time
    here, my anime backlog is growing?!
[14:17] Old Dude
    Let me go home already!
[14:20] Takachiho
    Unfortunately for you, this isn't
    an intervention or anything.
[14:24] Takachiho
    Although your mother did ask for my help.
[14:28] Takachiho
    You've been abusing animals,
[14:31] Takachiho
    and lately, you've even been getting
    violent with neighborhood kids.
[14:35] Takachiho
    So she asked me to deal with you.
[14:40] Old Dude
    You wanna "deal" with me?! What the fuck
    is your wrinkly ass talking about?!
[14:43] Old Dude
    I'm untouchable!
[14:45] Old Dude
    My dad's a government big shot! I can do
    whatever I want, and he'll cover it up!
[14:49] Old Dude
    Even if I kill you!
[15:02] Old Dude
    Ow!
[15:03] Old Dude
    Help! Mommy!
[15:06] Old Dudes
    What the hell?!
[15:07] Old Dudes
    Is this for real?! Or a prank?!
[15:08] Takachiho
    Now then, everyone, let's all quiet down!
[15:11] Takachiho
    Today, we're going to keep playing
    until there's only one of you left.
[15:16] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Ew, you can see their insides...
[15:19] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Weird how fast you get used to it, though.
[15:22] (Flashback) Kawado
    I know, right?
[15:24] (Flashback) Kawado
    If you watch it all the time,
    it stops being stimulating enough.
[15:29] Kuro
    That's a popular show from the Ninja 
    Broadcast Company, Me and Old Dudes*.
[15:34] Kuro
    They take criminals and accomplices that*
    the police can't touch from Japan and abroad
[15:40] Kuro
    and execute them publically.
[15:43] Kuro
    Why's it airing on civilian TV?
[15:53] (Flashback) Kato
    Get in.
[16:00] (Flashback) Eita
    School, huh?
[16:05] (Flashback) Eita
    Kuro-san... You're serious
    about protecting me, right?
[16:10] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yeah. Five hundred yen a pop.
[16:12] (Flashback) Eita
    You want me to pay?!
    I thought this was... a friend thing.
[16:15] (Flashback) Kuro
    But this is work.
[16:17] (Flashback) Eita
    It's... work?
[16:20] (Flashback) Junna
    Hey, it's the shut-in guy!
[16:22] (Flashback) Junna
    Finally going back to school? Have fun!
[16:25] (Flashback) Eita
    Shut up!
[16:26] (Flashback) Eita
    You must be pretty cheery
    about not getting beaten anymore.
[16:29] (Flashback) Junna
    Aw, shut up!
[16:34] (Flashback) Eita
    Whose house is that?
[16:40] (Flashback) Noguchi
    How do you know where I live?
[16:42] (Flashback) Kuro
    What do you mean?
[16:43] (Flashback) Kuro
    Don't you remember how I followed you home
    without you noticing the other day?
[16:46] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Gross! Don't do that kind of thing!
[16:50] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Why are we walking to school
    together? Seriously.
[16:53] (Flashback) Noguchi
    And Eita-kun's coming back to class, huh?
[16:56] (Flashback) Eita
    Y-Yeah. Because Kuro-kun
    said he'd protect me...
[17:00] (Flashback) Kuro
    Well, aren't you two chummy?
[17:04] (Flashback) Noguchi
    We went to the same schools
    our whole lives, that's all!
[17:07] (Flashback) Noguchi
    He's been bullied by the guys,
    which is, y'know, bad and all...
[17:12] (Flashback) Noguchi
    But because he tried to plant
    a camera in the girls' bathroom,
[17:14] (Flashback) Noguchi
    none of them will take his side.
[17:17] (Flashback) Eita
    I keep saying, that was all
    a big misunderstanding!
[17:20] (Flashback) Eita
    When I snuck into the girls' bathroom
    to set up the camera,
[17:23] (Flashback) Eita
    there was already a microphone.
[17:25] (Flashback) Eita
    And when I told the teacher about it...
[17:28] (Flashback) Noguchi
    But you did go into the girls'
    bathroom with a camera.
[17:31] (Flashback) Eita
    Well...
[17:34] Kuro
    A microphone. Likely planted
    by an ally or an enemy.
[17:38] Kuro
    Better be careful what I say
    on school grounds.
[17:42] (Flashback) Eita
    Huh? It's the director.
[17:45] (Flashback) Eita
    What's he doing here?
[17:49] (Flashback) Kuro
    So that's him...
[18:06] Kuro
    Three hundred twenty-one yen.
[18:18] Kuro
    He can use clairaudience, huh?
[18:21] (Flashback) Teacher
    Okay, I'm going to introduce
    the transfer student now.
[18:25] (Flashback) Teacher
    This is Kumogakure Kuro-kun,
    who will be joining us from today on.
[18:31] (Flashback) Boy Student
    He's barefoot?
[18:32] (Flashback) Girl Student
    He's barefoot...
[18:34] (Flashback) Teacher
    And then... come on, Eita!
[18:36] (Flashback) Teacher
    You're not a transfer student!
    What're you standing up for?
[18:40] (Flashback) Eita
    Oh, that's, er...
[18:44] (Flashback) Teacher
    Go on! Both of you, sit down.
[18:52] (Flashback) Azuma
    How about you leave and then
    come back in through the rear door?
[18:56] (Flashback) Azuma
    'Cause if you step over my leg, you're dead.
[19:05] (Flashback) Azuma
    Ow! You little—
[19:08] (Flashback) Eita
    Wait, that wasn't me!
[19:11] (Flashback) Eita
    My leg just...
[19:13] (Flashback) Azuma
    This isn't over, Eita.
[19:16] (Flashback) Azuma
    Did you pull that shit knowing my dad
    was an assemblyman for Nerima Ward?
[19:19] (Flashback) Noguchi
    I thought he lost the last election, though.
[19:23] (Flashback) Azuma
    Well... I mean, he did, but...
[19:30] (Flashback) Eita
    Well, this is off to a great start!
[19:33] (Flashback) Eita
    Do you want me to become a shut-in again?
[19:35] (Flashback) Kuro
    Don't worry about him.
[19:36] (Flashback) Eita
    Kuro-san!
[19:45] (Flashback) Eita
    Who's that?
[19:46] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'll be back later.
[20:18] Yamada
    Sorry to ask for your help.
[20:21] Eita
    It's fine! This box is really light!
[20:24] Eita
    Well, would you look at this?
[20:27] Eita
    I've been in the same class as her
    for the past two years,
[20:29] Eita
    and Yamada Mitsuki-san
    has finally spoken to me.
[20:33] Eita
    She's the prettiest girl in our year,
    she's cheerful and sensible,
[20:36] Eita
    she treats everybody equally,
    and she's beloved by guys and girls.
[20:41] Eita
    And now I'm walking alone with her
    in a deserted part of the campus...
[20:46] Eita
    Could this be...
[20:49] Eita
    Can you think of an affectionate way someone
    might refer to a sweet-natured adult cat?
[20:55] Yamada
    Um... A pussycat?
[20:58] Eita
    I might even end up losing my virgnity!
[21:01] Eita
    I need to prepare mentally!
[21:03] Azuma
    Hey, it's Eita!
[21:05] Azuma
    Fancy running into you back here.
[21:07] Yamada
    You asked me to bring him, Azuma-kun.
[21:10] Eita
    Yamada-san?!
[21:12] Yamada
    Good luck, Eita-kun!
[21:15] Yamada
    See ya!
[21:18] Azuma
    I actually had some questions for you.
[21:22] Eita
    U-Uh...
[21:30] Azuma
    I'm trying to talk here.
[21:33] Azuma
    Lately I've been seeing
[21:35] Azuma
    a bunch of nasty anonymous postings
    on social media, targeted at yours truly.
[21:40] Azuma
    You know anything about that?
[21:42] Eita
    N-No...
[21:44] Azuma
    No? 'Cause when I looked it up,
    some of these posts...
[21:49] Azuma
    were from a day when we had class.
    A pop quiz, in fact.
[21:53] Azuma
    So it couldn't be anyone from our class.
[21:56] Azuma
    With the exception of you, Eita-kun,
    who didn't come in that day.
[22:01] Azuma
    You were talking all that shit
    about me, weren't you?
[22:04] Eita
    N-No! No! It wasn't me!
[22:07] Noheji
    Eita, it has to be you.
[22:11] Eita
    Ah... um...
[22:18] Noheji
    Who the hell are you?
SIGN    Episode 6: "The Lid on This Hellish Cauldron Has Come Off"
[23:55] Kuro
    I notice you don't have a family name, Eita.
[23:57] Eita
    That is obviously untrue.
    I have one like anyone else.
[23:59] Kuro
    Let's hear it, then.
[24:00] Eita
    My family name is... Huh?
[24:02] Eita
    Wait, what is this?!
    Why can't I say my family name?!
[24:05] Kuro
    I'll tell you why. Because it hasn't
    come up in the source material yet.
[24:08] Eita
    What source material?!

E6 - The Lid on This Hellish Cauldron Has Come Off
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Azuma
    Okay, what is this?
    Who are you supposed to be?
[00:06] Eita
    Kuro-san... Has he come to save me?
[00:10] Azuma
    Hey, Noheji. Who do you think this is?
[00:13] Azuma
    ...is how I make a feint before one of these!
[00:16] Azuma
    Huh? He didn't even budge.
[00:21] Noheji
    That's a sanchin stance...
[00:23] Noheji
    This dude must do karate.
[00:26] Noheji
    Might wanna watch yourself, Azuma.
[00:30] Azuma
    Hey! Don't hide in there. Come on out.
[00:46] Noheji
    You want some of this?!
[00:48] Eita
    A tactical baton?
    Were they gonna use that on me?!
[00:52] Eita
    But... I have my assassin that I paid to—
[00:57] Eita
    Why is he behind me?!
[00:58] Kuro
    Listen up, Eita.
[01:00] Kuro
    Right hand is rock, left hand is paper.
[01:03] Eita
    Right and left... What?
[01:05] Noheji
    What the hell are you talking about?!
[01:09] Kuro
    Now, relax for me.
[01:15] Noheji
    Wh-What the?!
[01:27] Eita
    Ow!
[01:31] Kuro
    The invisibility's worn off.
    I guess a charge really doesn't last long.
[01:37] Kuro
    You can take it from here.
    Finish them off if you want.
[01:41] Kuro
    You did it, so it's your call.
[01:43] Eita
    I'm not sure what I should do...
[01:46] Kuro
    One thing.
[01:49] Kuro
    Where's the director's office?
[01:52] Eita
    He's usually in the boiler room.
SIGN    Episode 6: "The Lid on This Hellish Cauldron Has Come Off"
[03:38] Kuro
    This must be it.
[03:49] Director
    I guess I'm impressed.
[03:52] Director
    Heading straight into
    enemy territory like this...
[03:56] Director
    The invisibility you ninja love
    so much won't work on me.
[04:05] Director
    I didn't think you'd come here quite
    so soon, Kumogakure Kuro-kun.
[04:11] Kuro
    I can come back later, then.
[04:15] Director
    Come on, why don't you relax
    and have a cup of tea?!
[04:32] Director
    Impressive.
[04:34] Director
    To blow that dart with such precise timing...
[04:37] Director
    And the latest NIN armor.
    It lives up to its reputation.
[04:42] Director
    The blade resistance has improved
    almost as much as the invisibility.
[04:47] Director
    With an older model, your arm
    would be on the ground right now.
[04:50] Kuro
    Give up now.
    Escape has already targeted you.
[04:55] Kuro
    Attack again and your arm will evaporate.
[05:01] Director
    It's an honor to be in the cross hairs
    of NIN's ultimate weapon, Escape.
[05:06] Director
    On the roof before, it was
    Hachiya-kun's laser pointer...
[05:11] Director
    But I'd be thrilled if the
    real deal was aimed at me.
[05:15] Kuro
    Care to find out?
[05:17] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Ew, you can see their insides...
[05:19] (Flashback) Noguchi
    Weird how fast you get used to it, though.
[05:22] (Flashback) Kawado
    I know, right?
[05:23] (Flashback) Kawado
    If you watch it all the time,
    it stops being stimulating enough.
[05:28] (Flashback) Kuro
    Pardon me.
[05:30] (Flashback) Kato
    Sit.
[05:31] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sir.
[05:34] (Flashback) Kuro
    I was wondering...
[05:35] (Flashback) Kato
    What is it?
[05:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    The popular show from the
    Ninja Broadcast Company,
[05:39] (Flashback) Kuro
    Me and Old Dudes, was airing on regular TV.
[05:45] (Flashback) Kato
    Normally, the signal is scrambled
    so that civilian TVs can't pick it up.
[05:51] (Flashback) Kato
    But there's a selection of households
    that can view it normally.
[05:55] (Flashback) Kuro
    Is it part of the support offered
    to victims of the Ninja Disaster?
[05:58] (Flashback) Kato
    There are times when the aims of shinobi
    and the government don't align.
[06:03] (Flashback) Kato
    Should it come to that, our last bastion
[06:05] (Flashback) Kato
    will be the support we
    have among the citizenry.
[06:08] (Flashback) Kato
    One of our jobs as shinobi is to see
    that public resentment doesn't fall on us.
[06:13] (Flashback) Kuro
    "What the people don't know won't hurt them."
[06:18] (Flashback) Kato
    I didn't bring you in for chitchat.
[06:21] (Flashback) Kato
    Command has decided to
    provide you additional gear
[06:23] (Flashback) Kato
    for your infiltration of Kodan High School.
[06:25] (Flashback) Kuro
    The mission's danger rating
    has increased, then?
[06:29] (Flashback) Kato
    Choose whatever you like.
[06:31] (Flashback) Kato
    This is a drone shuriken.
[06:33] (Flashback) Kato
    It's the latest model, and automatically
    follows a target until it connects.
[06:39] (Flashback) Kato
    There's also a folding handgun.
    The foreigner we took in the other day—
[06:45] (Flashback) Kuro
    Then...
[06:47] (Flashback) Kuro
    Can I have what's in the boxes?
[06:52] (Flashback) Kato
    These are mine.
[06:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    Sorry...
[06:55] (Flashback) Kato
    What else?
[06:58] (Flashback) Kuro
    Is that a weapon, too?
[07:02] (Flashback) Kato
    It's an Italian self-driving motorcycle
    with onboard AI, Teo.
[07:08] (Flashback) Kato
    Hey, Teo. Wake up.
[07:11] (Flashback) Kato
    I said wake up!
[07:15] Teo
    Huh? Uh, right!
[07:18] Teo
    What's up?
[07:19] (Flashback) Kato
    Looks like you've finally got a partner.
[07:21] Teo
    Oh, shit! For real?!
[07:23] (Flashback) Kuro
    So is it, like... remote-controlled, or...
[07:27] Teo
    No, man! I'm talking to you
    of my own free will.
[07:30] Teo
    And come on, seriously? That's not a girl!
[07:34] (Flashback) Teo
    Sorry, buddy, but only chicks
    are allowed to straddle me.
[07:37] (Flashback) Kuro
    I'll take him.
[07:38] Teo
    Come on! Listen when I talk to you!
[07:42] (Flashback) Kato
    The plan was to scrap him
    due to difficulty of use.
[07:45] Teo
    Wait, seriously?!
[07:47] (Flashback) Kato
    Pipe down.
[07:48] (Flashback) Kato
    What else?
[07:51] (Flashback) Kuro
    Anything else you're
    comfortable parting with...
[07:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    And the targeting device for Escape.
[07:59] Director
    If they actually authorized
    a lowly genin to use Escape,
[08:04] Director
    then Nerima is going to be set ablaze again,
    like during the 22-2-22 incident.
SIGN    Escape Unit Zero
[08:58] Director
    It seems the lid on this hellish
    cauldron has just come off...
[09:05] Director
    Kuro-kun.
[09:13] Kuro
    Looks like the hoodie has GPS
    and a mic installed, too.
SIGN    Hmph.
SIGN    I didn't think you'd actually receive authorization.
SIGN    It saved my life.
SIGN    You could've been hit.
SIGN    It's not that precise.
[09:42] Nekohira
    I am a cat.
[09:44] Nekohira
    One without a name yet.
[09:47] Nekohira
    Or... I had one?
[09:50] Nekohira
    There was some crass woman on the first
    floor who called me... Shinobu? I think.
[09:57] Nekohira
    Wait... I have awareness that I'm a cat?
[10:02] Nekohira
    Actually, the fact that I know the word
    "awareness" makes me one amazing cat.
[10:08] Nekohira
    Some kinda super cat?
[10:10] Nekohira
    Wait, no, the real issue is the fact that
    I understand Japanese in the first place.
[10:19] Nekohira
    What was I thinking again?
[10:23] Nekohira
    I'm actually kinda hungry.
[10:35] Nekohira
    There she is. She even sleeps seedy.
[10:40] Nekohira
    Defenseless, too.
[10:43] Nekohira
    Okay, rise and shine!
[10:51] Kawado
    That tickles!
[10:53] Kawado
    Oh, Shinobu.
[11:00] Kawado
    You woke me up at the perfect time.
[11:03] Kawado
    Good boy, Shinobu.
SIGN    Me and Old Dudes
[11:06] Takachiho
    All right, you good little old dudes!
    How are you doing?
[11:10] Takachiho
    It's me, Miss Takachiho!
[11:10] Kawado
    This is when the Me and Old Dudes rerun airs.
[11:14] Kawado
    Wanna watch with me?
[11:19] Old Dude
    Ow! Help! Mommy!
[11:23] Nekohira
    Huh... Something about this is familiar.
[11:26] Old Dudes
    What the hell?!
[11:27] Nekohira
    Actually, I think I was there...
[11:28] Old Dudes
    Is this for real?! Or a prank?!
[11:30] Takachiho
    Now then, everyone, let's all quiet down!
[11:34] Takachiho
    Today, we're going to keep playing
    until there's only one of you left.
[11:38] Nekohira
    I fought there, and then... those ninja...
[11:45] Nekohira
    killed me!
[11:51] Nekohira
    But... why am I a cat?
[11:55] Nekohira
    If I remember right...
[12:00] (Flashback) Researcher
    Hello there, son. I take it you're awake?
[12:03] (Flashback) Researcher
    It's quite impressive that
    you managed to survive
[12:06] (Flashback) Researcher
    against our Rainbow Hound
    until the very end.
[12:11] (Flashback) Researcher
    Out of respect for your tenacity,
    we've kept a portion of your brain intact.
[12:18] (Flashback) Researcher
    We've had real trouble with
    mortality rates post-transplant...
[12:22] (Flashback) Researcher
    So we have big hopes for you!
[12:38] Nekohira
    So my brain...
[12:42] Nekohira
    was transplanted into this cat?
[12:49] Kawado
    Huh? Kuro-kun?
[12:51] Kawado
    Aren't you back kinda early?
[12:54] Kuro
    I was sleepy, so I left early.
[12:56] Kawado
    On your first day?!
[12:58] Kawado
    Look, I get how you feel,
    but don't get kicked out, okay?
[13:02] Kuro
    Well, who knows what'll happen?
[13:06] Nekohira
    This guy...
[13:15] Nekohira
    He's the one who killed me!
[13:20] Kawado
    Huh? Shinobu, what's got you so upset?
[13:25] Kawado
    Oh, Kuro-kun, if you're bored,
    why don't we drink in Ono-san's room?
[13:30] Nekohira
    Wait, I could've sworn
    I was thinking something...
[13:40] Kawado
    Kuro-kun?
[13:41] Kuro
    Oh... Sure.
[13:46] Kato
    You've made it home safely,
[13:49] Kato
    Onikobe.
[13:51] Onikobe
    Sir! The new recruit relieved me of duty.
[13:55] Onikobe
    What battlefield am I to be sent to next?
[14:00] Kato
    Your next battlefield...
[14:03] Kato
    is right here.
[14:08] Eita
    The first day since the
    bullies were dealt with...
[14:11] Eita
    It's like a whole new world.
[14:13] Eita
    Azuma made some excuse about being
    hospitalized, like a politician would...
[14:17] Eita
    And I don't see Noheji, either.
[14:20] Eita
    Kuro-san also isn't here, for some reason...
[14:24] Eita
    And everyone believes I kicked their asses.
[14:27] Eita
    I think my life might
    actually be turning around!
[14:29] Eita
    Maybe I'll become popular?!
[14:33] Eita
    Ow...
[14:36] Noheji
    Hey. Mind if I have a word?
[14:46] Eita
    This has gotta be payback
    for yesterday, right?
[14:49] Noheji
    Eita.
[14:53] Noheji
    Please! You've gotta bring that
    transfer student, Kuro-san, around.
[15:00] Noheji
    It's like... I know he's the
    one who actually hit me,
[15:04] Noheji
    and he... Kuro-san...
[15:06] Noheji
    is one of those folks you're not
    supposed to talk about in this country.
[15:09] Noheji
    He's a ninja, isn't he?!
[15:11] Eita
    You just said it out loud.
[15:12] Noheji
    And he's probably staying at
    your house for some reason, right?
[15:17] Eita
    Not exactly...
[15:18] Noheji
    Please! You've gotta help me meet Kuro-san!
[15:21] Eita
    Come on, I don't know
    what you expect me to—
[15:23] Kuro
    What's up?
[15:25] Eita
    You were here?!
[15:30] Noheji
    You kicked my ass like it was nothing!
    And I have a request!
[15:36] Eita
    Not happening...
[15:37] Noeheji
    Will you help me in a fight against
    some guys from another school?!
[15:41] Eita
    Kuro-san's got an exclusive contract with me.
[15:44] Kuro
    What are the details?
[15:47] Eita
    You're gonna hear him out?
[15:56] Ono
    Kuro-kun's actually at school.
[16:00] Kato
    Aw, that's a problem.
    This package is actually perishable.
[16:03] Ono
    Oh, I can hold it for him, then.
[16:06] Ono
    He doesn't have a refrigerator, anyway.
[16:08] Kato
    You're a lifesaver!
[16:10] Kato
    Can I get your stamp?
[16:11] Ono
    Uh, one second...
[16:15] Kato
    I really appreciate it.
[16:17] Ono
    Now, where did I put that thing?
[16:42] Kato
    You've been living here longer than
    anyone else in the building, right?
[16:45] Ono
    Hate to admit it, but it
    really is like home to me...
[16:49] Kato
    I'm curious, when did Kumogakure-san move in?
[16:53] Ono
    Kuro-kun kinda forced his way in...
[16:57] Ono
    Huh? Feels kinda like it was pretty recent,
    but also like he's always been there...
[17:02] Ono
    Huh?
[17:03] Kato
    He's been hypnotized.
[17:07] Kato
    Controlled so that his memories
    of Kumogakure are hazy.
[17:23] Noheji
    Thanks to my dad, I grew up reading 
    Gorillaman and Be-Bop, stuff like that.
[17:27] Kuro
    I read those, too.
[17:28] Noheji
    Really?! They're pretty great, right?
[17:31] Noheji
    So, I've always looked up
    to Yankee-style punks...
[17:34] Noheji
    But as I'm sure you know,
    they're kind of an endangered species.
[17:39] Noheji
    A brawl with guys from another school...
    I figured that was just a dream.
[17:42] Noheji
    So I was picking on weaklings instead,
    which is in no way satisfying.
[17:46] Eita
    That was the reason I was being bullied?
[17:49] Kuro**
    So, where's this going?
[17:52] Noheji
    It turns out there's a
    missing link here in Nerima.
[17:56] Noheji
    A regular coelacanth high school!
[17:59] Kuro
    And where is it?
[18:01] Noheji
    The Nerima Ward School...
[18:03] Noheji
    Yankii High!
[18:09] Kato
    Onikobe, what did you find
    in Kumogakure's room?
[18:13] Onikobe
    Sir, the tea table he had was
    an auto-deploying defense shield.
[18:19] Onikobe
    Also, installed beneath his floor
[18:21] Onikobe
    was a shelter capable of
    withstanding a bunker buster.
[18:26] Onikobe
    I believe the building itself
    still has more secrets.
[18:30] Onikobe
    Escape would be able to destroy it.
    I don't think it poses any real threat.
[18:35] Kato
    What about the other residents?
[18:38] Onikobe
    They're normal civilians, sir.
[18:40] Onikobe
    I'd have them under control in three minutes.
[18:44] Kato
    You think that too, huh?
[18:46] Kato
    I'll admit, going into that building,
    even I tend to lower my guard.
[18:49] Kato
    Rather, it's set up in a way
    to make me lower it.
[18:52] Kato
    They're so easygoing, it's unnatural.
[18:54] Kato
    They don't betray any kind of presence...
[18:56] Kato
    The same way a jonin would.
[18:59] Onikobe
    You think they're Kumogakure's bodyguards?
[19:02] Kato
    Can't tell. But we're at war.
[19:06] Kato
    There's no telling what might happen.
[19:12] Hibi
    What? You need something?
[19:14] Kuro
    Hey, Hibi.
[19:15] Kuro
    We're gonna go pick a fight with
    Yankii High School for no reason. You in?
[19:18] Hibi
    Oh, hell yeah.
[19:19] Eita
    So casual?!
[19:20] Hibi
    More importantly, did the school
    get hit with a laser yesterday?
[19:25] Kuro
    It was Escape. I called in fire support.
[19:28] Hibi
    Are you shitting me?
[19:30] Hibi
    That's top secret ninja tech,
    and you made the call?
[19:33] Hibi
    I can dodge lightning, but not that bad boy.
[19:36] Kuro
    The lightning did hit you, though.
[19:39] Noheji
    I hate to interrupt, but...
[19:43] Noheji
    Are you the legendary delinquent
    who single-handedly beat
[19:45] Noheji
    the ass of every punk in Nerima
    and eastern Tokyo,
[19:48] Noheji
    Thunder Hibi-san?!
[19:51] Hibi
    So you've heard of me.
[19:54] Noheji
    This is awesome!
[19:55] Noheji
    You were my hero in elementary school!
[19:59] Noheji
    Wait... What are you doing
    in this school, though?
[20:01] Noheji
    You'd have to be a fair bit older...
[20:06] Hibi
    It's part of the job.
[20:07] Hibi
    I wouldn't ask any more questions.
[20:09] Noheji
    Right! You got it!
[20:11] Eita
    What is with these people?
[20:13] Eita
    They're making it super obvious
    that they're ninja.
[20:16] Hibi
    But Kuro, if they let you use Escape,
[20:19] Hibi
    then this mission is probably a lot
    more dangerous than we thought.
[20:23] Hibi
    What's going on?
[20:25] Kuro
    I have no clue, but command
    wouldn't give a second thought
[20:28] Kuro
    to blowing the whole school away.
[20:32] Hibi
    We're looking at a second
    22-2-22 incident, then...
[20:38] Hibi
    You know, though,
[20:40] Hibi
    I wish we had a reason to raid these guys
    rather than it being totally random.
[20:44] Noheji
    In terms of motivation for brawls,
    someone's girl being stolen is a big one.
[20:49] Kuro
    I was wondering, who's that girl
    who had you carrying the box, Eita?
[20:55] Eita
    Yamada-san?
[20:57] Noheji
    That's her.
[20:59] Noheji
    She's the prettiest girl in school,
    but she's kinda... Well, just look at her.
[21:04] Noheji
    Makes people tend to keep their distance.
[21:06] Eita
    Ew, she's eating her boogers.
[21:09] Kuro
    Boogers are actually a natural
    supplement, rich in vitamin D.
[21:14] Kuro
    I'm impressed.
[21:16] Eita
    You're lying. I know you're lying.
[21:18] Kuro
    Do you really think she'll cooperate?
[21:22] Kuro
    By letting those punks get on her case.
[21:29] Noheji
    She says it's okay.
[21:31] Eita
    That was fast!
[21:34] Eita
    They said to put my hair in a pompadour
    since we're going to Yankii High...
[21:39] Eita
    But I don't wanna.
[21:42] Lady
    Ei-chan! How's your mom been?
[21:45] Lady
    I heard you're going back to school!
[21:47] Eita
    Yeah...
[21:48] Lady
    Oh, pomade, huh?
[21:51] Lady
    Back in school, feeling saucy...
    Got a date or something?
[21:55] Lady
    Well, you make sure to take care
    of your mother, Ei-chan!
[21:59] Lady
    Thanks, come again!
[22:02] Eita
    I seriously have no idea what
    that lady's deal is.
[22:05] Eita
    I've asked Mom about her
    and she says she doesn't know.
[22:09] Eita
    Just who is she?
SIGN    Episode 7: "Meow Meow, Meow Meow, Meow Meow Meow Meow Meow?"
[23:55] Kuro
    Yours is somewhere around the 6800s for
    common family names in Japan, Ozu-san.
[23:59] Ozu
    That's a shockamole!
[24:00] Kuro
    A... shocka-what?
[24:03] Ozu
    I'm saying it's a shock, obviously.
[24:05] Ozu
    It's a regular holy guacamole
    shockamole, you see.
[24:08] Kuro
    I'm sorry, could you speak Japanese?

E7 - Meow Meow, Meow Meow, Meow Meow Meow Meow Meow?
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:10] Lady
    Welcome...
[00:13] Lady
    Well.
[00:38] Lady
    You think a cheap little toy
    like that is gonna get me off?
[00:42] Lady
    Whip it out, sonny. Let's have some fun.
[00:51] Lady
    Multiple enemies... no, only one presence.
[01:08] Eita
    Maybe I should go back to being a shut-in.
[01:12] Suzuki
    I finally get to see
    Yoshida Akikazu-sensei again...
[01:15] Suzuki
    I can't wait to give him
    a lot of negative criticism.
SIGN    Episode 7: "Meow Meow, Meow Meow, Meow Meow Meow Meow Meow?"
[03:11] Saruta
    Damn, this is a lot of blood!
[03:16] Saruta
    Pretty impressive, though.
[03:17] Saruta
    I guess if you're old-school enough a ninja,
[03:20] Saruta
    you try to fulfill your duty to the very end.
[03:30] Lady
    The voice I heard from the other
    direction wasn't an illusion...
[03:35] Lady
    but from a speaker installed in the shuriken.
[03:39] Saruta
    Come on now, granny, no spoilers.
[03:46] Lady
    Expanding your invisibility
    suit for a moment...
[03:50] Lady
    to blow the blood I got on it off...
    and restore its complete invisibility...
[03:55] Lady
    probably also... can neutralize some attacks...
[04:03] Lady
    Commander Sasama... Big Sis Takachiho...
[04:07] Lady
    I'll be... passing on... first...
[04:19] Saruta
    That's one down.
SIGN    One Month Ago
[04:35] (Flashback) Saruta
    Already?!
[04:37] (Flashback) UN
    You seem to be surprised.
[04:40] (Flashback) UN
    I know you're a failure, but you were trying
    to flee your shinobi organization,
[04:44] (Flashback) UN
    without a means to escape overseas.
[04:48] (Flashback) UN
    Did you really think you could survive?
[04:54] (Flashback) Saruta
    True enough...
[04:56] (Flashback) Saruta
    But I... was betting on a rumor I heard.
[04:59] (Flashback) UN
    And what might that rumor be?
[05:02] (Flashback) UN
    Defecting to UN?
[05:05] (Flashback) UN
    Working for us?
[05:08] (Flashback) Saruta
    You're really with UN?
[05:11] (Flashback) Saruta
    You've got the wrong idea here.
[05:13] (Flashback) Saruta
    I didn't run because I wanted to survive.
[05:20] (Flashback) Saruta
    The idea of living long enough for
    my ninja skills to fade with age...
[05:25] (Flashback) Saruta
    I'd rather die than go through that.
[05:28] (Flashback) Saruta
    I'll be blunt with you:
[05:31] (Flashback) Saruta
    As long as I get to fight,
    I'll side with anyone!
[05:36] (Flashback) Saruta
    Put me on a battlefield!
[05:38] (Flashback) Saruta
    Give me a place where I can die fighting!
[05:43] (Flashback) UN
    Very well.
[05:45] (Flashback) UN
    I know the perfect place for you.
[05:51] (Flashback) Saruta
    Gonna kill, and kill, and kill...
[05:55] (Flashback) Saruta
    And keep killing until the day I die!
[06:08] Saruta
    Now, who dies next?
[06:21] Yoshida
    I finally finished my manuscript, so I'm
    going to get a good night's sleep for once.
[06:27] Yoshida
    Nobunaga, oh how he died, at Honnoji...
[06:32] Yoshida
    That Akechi, he went rogue,
    and it was such bad news!
[06:36] Yoshida
    Along came Hideyoshi and...
[06:39] Yoshida
    I think I had some strawberry
    milk in my fridge.
[06:45] Suzuki
    Oh, Yoshida-sensei.
[06:47] Suzuki
    This manuscript is wonderfu—
[06:49] Suzuki
    Eek! Sensei, what are you doing?!
    We don't know each other that well yet!
[06:53] Yoshida
    Whoa, hang on! I was just in the bath!
[06:57] Yoshida
    What are you even doing here
    in the first place, Suzuki-san?
[07:02] Suzuki
    I came to pick up your manuscript.
[07:05] Suzuki
    The door was unlocked.
[07:08] Yoshida
    What? I'm pretty sure I locked it.
[07:10] Yoshida
    And I thought I had a different editor now?
[07:14] Suzuki
    No,
[07:16] Suzuki
    I'm going to be your editor
    until the day I die.
[07:18] Yoshida
    U-Until death?
[07:22] Junna
    You know the lady from the convenience store?
[07:25] Junna
    I think she knows me, too.
[07:29] Junna
    She was the one who went to the
    "child welfare center" or whatever.
[07:34] Eita
    I see.
[07:35] Eita
    So she's not a bad person.
[07:38] Eita
    Question, though: why are you at my place?
[07:42] Junna
    Mom is late getting home,
[07:45] Junna
    and you're the only one I know
    who can take me to the store.
[07:49] Eita
    You already know I just got back from there.
[07:52] Eita
    Plus, you don't have any money.
    You just wanna use mine.
[07:57] Junna
    You're so cheap!
[07:59] Junna
    I'm gonna go by myself and
    when the police take me in,
[08:02] Junna
    I'm gonna tell them the weird high school
    kid in my building messed with me!
[08:09] Eita
    Don't! They might actually come after me!
[08:17] Suzuki
    I rejected the majority of the manuscript.
[08:20] Suzuki
    Now I can visit him on the way
    home from school tomorrow!
SIGN    Emergency Shinobi Notice
[08:28] Suzuki
    An emergency shinobi notice?
SIGN    Emergency Shinobi Notice
    
    September 10 7:17PM
[08:31] Suzuki
    There was an attack at a convenience store...
[08:34] Suzuki
    A shinobi was killed.
[08:37] Suzuki
    She was one of our teachers...
[08:39] Suzuki
    I honestly thought the old bat was immortal.
[08:45] Suzuki
    Complete invisibility...
[08:46] Suzuki
    Does this mean UN is behind the attack?
[08:51] Suzuki
    And if they targeted a kunoichi...
[08:54] Suzuki
    If the attacker left the store
[08:55] Suzuki
    and then immediately ran into another
    kunoichi walking around at night...
[09:05] Suzuki
    Bingo!
[09:17] Suzuki
    They really are invisible...
    And they're concealing their presence.
[09:21] Suzuki
    It really is different from the downgraded
    Marishiten they let us use domestically.
[09:25] Suzuki
    Yoshida-sensei... I might die today.
[09:34] Junna
    Huh? It's the violent lady.
[09:37] Junna
    What'cha doing?
[09:40] Suzuki
    Junna, run!
[09:55] Junna
    Hey, it's Stitches! Where've you been?
[10:00] Junna
    I was worried about you.
[10:05] Suzuki
    Okay... I'm putting my weapon
    down, so let the girl go.
[10:10] Suzuki
    Damn it... I lost track of them when
    Junna showed up and caught my attention.
[10:15] Suzuki
    The Ninja Lab came up with
    this poison. D9-49-9386.
[10:20] Suzuki
    If I can tag them, they'll die in two seconds.
[10:23] Suzuki
    But that's long enough
    for Junna to be killed...
[10:35] Saruta
    Is that cat talking?
SIGN    Is that you, Saruta?
[10:41] Saruta
    Are you... Nekohira?!
[10:43] Junna
    Violent lady...
[10:45] Junna
    This cat is talking funny!
[10:47] Junna
    And I can hear a man
    behind me for some reason.
[10:51] Suzuki
    Just don't move!
[10:53] Suzuki
    The enemy's a male...
    And what's with that cat?
[10:57] Junna
    This is kinda scary!
[10:59] Junna
    Ow, ow, ow!
[11:00] Suzuki
    Don't hurt her! She's a civilian!
    What do you want?
[11:04] Suzuki
    Good. As long as he's got a hold
    on her, I can buy more time.
[11:09] Nekohira
    Hey, Saruta. That kunoichi...
[11:12] Nekohira
    Isn't that Suzuki?
[11:15] Saruta
    No way! Her face and voice
    are totally different.
[11:18] Saruta
    This is the girl they've got
    infiltrating Kodan High School.
[11:23] Nekohira
    It's easy to change your appearance.
[11:27] Nekohira
    You know this already,
    but I've got a real smell fetish.
[11:30] Nekohira
    And becoming a cat
    has given it a huge boost.
[11:32] Nekohira
    I still remember the smell
    of Suzuki's sweat vividly!
[11:40] (Flashback) Saruta
    U-Um... Would you please...
    I mean, do you wanna... well...
[11:46] (Flashback) Saruta
    g-go out with me?
[11:49] (Flashback) Suzuki
    I'm sorry!
[11:53] (Flashback) Suzuki
    I know exactly how you feel, Saruta-kun.
[11:57] (Flashback) Suzuki
    I feel the same way.
[12:00] (Flashback) Saruta
    Suzuki-san...
[12:02] (Flashback) Suzuki
    But when we graduate,
[12:04] (Flashback) Suzuki
    there's no telling what kind of ninja
    duty we'll be assigned to, right?
[12:07] (Flashback) Suzuki
    Onikobe is going to be an overseas operator,
    and who knows what'll happen to me?
[12:12] Saruta
    I saw her shoulders heaving as she walked
    away, and all I could do was watch...
[12:18] (Flashback) Nekohira
    Hey, Saruta! I came up with a cat language!
[12:21] (Flashback) Nekohira
    Check it!
SIGN    Ninja Technical School - Day of Graduation
[12:26] Teacher
    The Kunoichi Program has
    two valedictorians this year:
[12:30] (Flashback) Teacher
    Suzuki and Onikobe.
[12:32] (Flashback) Teacher
    The two of them have used the seduction
    arts over the last three years,
[12:37] (Flashback) Teacher
    resulting in 24 confessions for each
    of them, numbering a total of 48.
[12:41] (Flashback) Teacher
    And none of those 48 idiots realized
    they were in a honey trap.
[12:46] (Flashback) Nekohira
    O-Onikobe... You're kidding me.
[12:50] Saruta
    I'll never forget the smug look on her face!
[12:55] Nekohira
    Please, Saruta.
[12:56] Nekohira
    Kill me while I've still got my memories!
[13:00] Nekohira
    Come on, Saruta! Are you listening?
[13:03] Saruta
    Oh, sorry.
[13:05] Nekohira
    Oh, no... Hurry... My memories...
[13:13] Junna
    Stitches ran off...
[13:16] Junna
    Now what do I do?
[13:21] Saruta
    This isn't where you die.
[13:25] Saruta
    It'll be at Kodan High School.
[13:33] Suzuki
    Are you okay?
[13:35] Junna
    Not even a little!
[13:38] Saruta
    Suzuki...
[13:39] Saruta
    Dying in a school suits you perfectly.
[13:45] Taira
    Well?
[13:46] Ranran
    "Well" nothing. It doesn't even
    show up on the footage.
[13:51] Ranran
    See? Magazines fall over.
    Plastic bottles, too.
[13:54] Ranran
    They're not even being careful.
[13:56] Ranran
    After this is when the lady gets cut down,
    but you can't see the blade, either.
[14:03] Taira
    Just get to the point.
[14:05] Taira
    Was that thing built by the Ninja Lab?
[14:08] Ranran
    Unfortunately, nothing exists
    in my department
[14:12] Ranran
    that can erase visibility for
    a sword quite so perfectly.
[14:16] Ranran
    This tech would have every
    mouth back at the lab watering.
[14:22] Onikobe
    Ninja Chief Kato, it's dangerous
    to operate individually.
[14:26] Kato
    Who do you think you're talking to?
[14:29] Onikobe
    But, sir, this emergency
    summons is suspicious.
[14:32] Onikobe
    Might it be a trap?
[14:34] Onikobe
    I should attend as your guard.
[14:36] Kato
    You'll be on standby.
[14:38] Onikobe
    My Marishiten's sensors are
    picking up multiple readings.
[14:42] Onikobe
    There are people in Marishiten 3.5s,
    and they've already surrounded us.
[14:47] Kato
    Did you not hear me when I said
    you're on standby, Onikobe?
[14:51] Onikobe
    Sir!
[14:55] Ozu
    Come to think of it,
    there was that overseas mission...
[14:58] Ozu
    We were cleaning up a drug cartel after a
    crackdown by the Navy SEALs, but it went south,
[15:03] Ozu
    and we were trapped in wetlands just
    like these with Commander Sasama.
[15:08] Ozu
    I think the Marishiten model
    at the time was 2.0?
[15:11] Ozu
    They were so damn heavy,
    on the fritz from the humidity...
[15:14] Ozu
    Then the drug trafficking tunnels we were
    hiding in got lit up with a flamethrower.
[15:18] Ozu
    Everyone died but the three of us.
[15:22] Ozu
    You and I got cooked pretty bad
    protecting Chief Sasama.
[15:26] Ozu
    Granted, that led to the Ninja Lab
    giving me my old face back,
[15:30] Ozu
    so I could finally come back to Japan.
[15:32] Ozu
    And yet I find myself bored.
[15:35] Ozu
    Maybe in the end, we've got an urge
    to seek out conflict after all!
[15:39] Kato
    Could you can the chitchat?
[15:42] Ozu
    Relax. I mean, they might
    think they're hidden,
[15:45] Ozu
    but you can tell how much bloodlust
    we're surrounded by, right?
[15:48] Kato
    Yeah.
[15:50] Ozu
    The Rainbow Hound is around, too.
[15:54] Ozu
    Which means... Well, you know.
[15:59] Kato
    The Rainbow Hound...
[16:01] Kato
    Kumogakure Nijiro is nearby.
[16:05] Kato
    And if the Rainbow Hound is part of security,
    then there must be jonin class around...
[16:12] Sasama
    Hey, there you are.
[16:14] Kato
    Sasama...san?
[16:17] Sasama
    Kato, have you lost some weight?
[16:24] Kato
    Could it be?!
[16:25] Taira
    Hey. Been a while, Kato.
[16:30] Taira
    Why's Onikobe in Japan, working with you?
[16:35] Taira
    And can you explain how, as soon as
    she gets back, there was a killing?
[16:42] Sasama
    Lower the sword, Taira.
[16:49] Suzuki
    Hey, Onikobe.
[16:51] Suzuki
    I know you're in there. Come on out.
[16:54] Suzuki
    I haven't seen you since graduation.
    Let's chat.
[17:01] Suzuki
    Wow, going invisible? What's up?
[17:04] Suzuki
    I'm putting myself out here.
    Are you that scared of losing to me?
[17:16] Suzuki
    Relax. The people who are
    hiding won't make a move.
[17:24] Suzuki
    So fast—
[17:38] Suzuki
    Okay, stop.
[17:40] Suzuki
    You really are a lot stronger.
[17:42] Suzuki
    I guess I don't stand a
    chance against someone
[17:45] Suzuki
    who's been fighting on the front lines...
[17:47] Suzuki
    I got attacked last night.
[17:49] Suzuki
    By someone with complete invisibility.
[17:52] Onikobe
    You think that was me?
[17:54] Suzuki
    Hardly. You would've kept
    going until I was dead.
[17:59] Suzuki
    But the bigwigs suspect you and your boss.
[18:02] Suzuki
    The attacker knew that I was
    infiltrating a school on a mission.
[18:07] Suzuki
    This is speculation,
[18:09] Suzuki
    but I think it might be one of the classmates
    we caught with our honey trap project.
[18:14] Suzuki
    Can you think of anyone who'd hate us?
[18:17] Onikobe
    Too many to remember specifics, but...
[18:23] Onikobe
    I'll kill them if they come at me.
[18:24] Suzuki
    I bet you will! Welcome home, Onikobe.
[18:29] Suzuki
    Hard to tell with everyone wearing masks.
[18:32] Suzuki
    All the guys in our class
    asked you out, right?
[18:36] Onikobe
    A few of the girls, too.
[18:37] Suzuki
    Yeah, you always were a hit with the girls.
[18:41] Suzuki
    I can understand why they'd be mad,
    but who'd go as far as murder?
[18:46] Onikobe
    There was a guy who confessed in cat talk.
[18:50] Suzuki
    Oh, I remember!
[18:51] Suzuki
    I cracked up when he tried that with me.
[18:54] Suzuki
    Just kept meowing, and I had
    no idea what he was saying.
[18:57] Onikobe
    It was annoying enough
    that I considered killing him.
[18:57] Sign
    Saruta
[18:57] Sign
    Nekohira
[18:59] Suzuki
    What was his name? Nekota?
[19:00] Onikobe
    No. Nekohira.
[19:03] Suzuki
    Neko... Saru...
[19:06] Suzuki
    There was that Saruta guy, too.
[19:09] Suzuki
    I don't remember him too well,
    but he had a real cowardly look to his eyes.
[19:14] Suzuki
    Don't really remember anything else...
[19:17] Suzuki
    I'm thinking, if things move fast,
[19:18] Suzuki
    there'll be an attack at the school
    before the end of the week.
[19:22] Suzuki
    The Ninja Lab's looking into it, but...
[19:25] Suzuki
    According to a kouhai who works there,
[19:27] Suzuki
    this might've been a new suit deployed by UN.
[19:32] Suzuki
    Newer than your Marishiten 3.5
    or the latest 4.0, even.
[19:37] Suzuki
    Isn't that exciting?
[19:38] Onikobe
    I really wanna fight UN.
[19:41] Suzuki
    Wanna kill him together?
[19:42] Onikobe
    Yeah.
[19:47] Ozu
    Oh my God... That baby is adorable!
[19:51] Sasama
    The Ninja Lab thinks that the killing
[19:54] Sasama
    was carried out by someone in a
    new model of suit deployed by UN.
[19:58] Sasama
    Kato, whose orders are you under?
[20:02] Kato
    Okay, I understand.
[20:04] Kato
    That explains why you have someone
    higher-ranked than a jonin with you.
[20:08] Sasama
    You're exactly right, Kato.
[20:11] Sasama
    You're looking at one of the
    seven chief NIN officers, Tara.
[20:19] Ozu
    Seriously?!
[20:20] Ozu
    I thought he was Commander Sasama's
    kid and gave him head pats!
[20:24] Sasama
    It hasn't been long since the surgery,
[20:26] Sasama
    and we'll have to wait a while
    before he's able to converse,
[20:30] Sasama
    but he's here in order to establish
    the lines of communication.
[20:33] Kato
    A brain transplant...
[20:35] Kato
    I had heard there was a success
    with animals, but even humans now?
[20:40] Ozu
    Wait.
[20:41] Ozu
    What happened to
    Commander Sasama's kid, then?
[20:45] Ozu
    Did they—
[20:51] Ozu
    So cute! Like a little dumpling!
[20:54] Sasama
    All right, Kato.
[20:56] Sasama
    Either you've been under orders from
    someone else without my knowledge...
[21:00] Sasama
    Or maybe you've been acting
    on your own, without any orders.
[21:05] Sasama
    All I need to do is ask the functional
    head of NIN, Tara, to learn the truth.
[21:12] Kato
    By all means, then.
[21:15] Sasama
    I know better than most that you
    wouldn't crack under NIN torture.
[21:24] Sasama
    But I'm willing to overlook this string
    of unilateral calls you've made.
[21:29] Sasama
    In exchange, I want you to
    demonstrate your loyalty to NIN.
[21:35] Sasama
    Crawl between the Rainbow Hound's legs.
[21:41] Suzuki
    Hey!
[21:42] Suzuki
    Now they're suspecting me because of you!
[21:46] Onikobe
    Should I take her hostage...
    or fight with her help?
[21:50] Suzuki
    What now?
[21:52] Suzuki
    Do I let myself get taken hostage,
    or fight with Onikobe
[21:56] Suzuki
    and try to get injured enough
    to take tomorrow off school?
[22:00] Suzuki
    If UN really does attack the school,
    regardless of how the fight turns out,
[22:06] Suzuki
    there's a chance NIN will use Escape.
[22:08] Suzuki
    And if that happens, I die either way.
[22:11] Suzuki
    Oh, Yoshida-sensei...
[22:15] Suzuki
    I can't die. He'd be so sad.
[22:19] Suzuki
    A shinobi's true job is to survive.
[22:22] Suzuki
    Wait for me, Yoshida-sensei!
SIGN    Episode 8: "Every Last Ninja on the Surface Will Be Annihilated"
[23:55] Kuro
    Noguchi is ranked in the 90s for most
    common Japanese family names.
[23:58] Noguchi
    For real? You're not lying again?
[24:01] Kuro
    Come on, now. I've got an
    "I die if I lie" disease.
[24:04] Noguchi
    If that's a lie, then you're dead.
[24:06] Kuro
    I am? Why?
[24:07] Noguchi
    I don't know! And you probably won't!

E8 - Every Last Ninja on the Surface Will Be Annihilated
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] Sasama
    I want you to demonstrate
    your loyalty to NIN.
[00:05] Sasama
    Crawl between the Rainbow Hound's legs, Kato.
[00:16] Sasama
    What's wrong, Kato?
[00:18] Sasama
    Too proud to crawl under there?
[00:22] Sasama
    Or is it that you refuse to
    swear fealty to Tara? To NIN?
[00:44] Sasama
    What do you think, Kato?
[00:45] Sasama
    What's the view like from between
    the Rainbow Hound's legs?
[00:56] Kato
    Despite how old and faded they've become,
    the seven leaders still cling to power.
[01:02] Kato
    NIN might be done for.
[01:10] Suzuki
    Huh? They're gone.
[01:14] Suzuki
    I guess we don't have to fight.
[01:17] Suzuki
    Now I have to go to school after all.
[01:20] Onikobe
    Chief Ninja Kato's vitals are still active.
[01:23] Onikobe
    He's alive.
[01:26] Noguchi
    When I wake up, it'll be Monday.
[01:29] Noguchi
    I really don't wanna go to school...
[03:10] ---
    LIVE
    Rocket launched with 
    satellite cargo "forgotten"
SIGN    Episode 8: "Every Last Ninja on the Surface Will Be Annihilated"
[03:10] News Announcer
    NASA has said the satellite scheduled
    to be aboard the rocket
[03:14] News Announcer
    that was recently launched was,
    due to an error, not loaded.
[03:17] News Announcer
    According to workers involved with 
    the launch, the one in charge of...
[03:18] Noguchi Dad
    What the heck?!
[03:22] Noguchi
    I saw something!
    There was something there!
[03:24] Noguchi
    Eyes! Floating eyes! Above my bed!
[03:27] Nocuchi Dad
    Eyes? You sure it wasn't Mii-chan?
[03:30] Noguchi
    You know how she likes to sleep on your chest,
    on account of it not being too bumpy.
[03:36] Noguchi
    First off, rude!
[03:37] Noguchi
    And Mii-chan is right there!
[03:40] Dad
    Hey, she is. And she's so cute!
[03:44] Noguchi
    Mom, is this house haunted or something?!
[03:47] Noguchi Mom
    Don't be rude. Your father begged
    the bank to give us a 40-year loan
[03:51] Noguchi Mom
    instead of a 30-year one to pay
    for this house, you know.
[03:55] Nocuchi Dad
    That's right.
[03:56] Nocuchi Dad
    I'm probably gonna die before it's paid off,
    too, so good luck with that.
[04:00] Noguchi
    No way! Quit trying to stick
    me with a bunch of debt!
[04:06] Noguchi
    Talking to those two is exhausting...
[04:12] Noguchi
    Well, I don't think anyone's here.
[04:19] Noguchi
    Man, what was that all about?
[04:28] Noguchi
    Better get some sleep.
[04:40] Noguchi
    It happened again! It happened again!
[04:42] Kuro
    Would you knock it off with the screaming?
[04:44] Kuro
    It's just me. Kuro.
[04:46] Kuro
    No perverts here.
[04:48] Noguchi
    Kuro-kun?
[04:50] Noguchi
    What are you doing in my house?!
[04:53] Kuro
    Am I not allowed to just come in?
[04:55] Noguchi
    Obviously not!
[04:57] Noguchi
    How'd you even get in?!
[05:00] Kuro
    The window.
[05:01] Noguchi
    "The window," my ass!
[05:03] Noguchi
    You can't just break in! If the school
    found out, you could get expelled!
[05:07] Kuro
    It's fine. The school's gonna be gone soon.
[05:12] Kuro
    Don't come to school tomorrow, Noguchi.
[05:17] Kuro
    See ya.
[05:21] Kuro
    That's all. I'm going now.
[05:23] Noguchi
    That's all? You're not gonna do anything?
[05:31] Noguchi
    Hey, wait!
[05:34] Noguchi
    What's this stuff about the school being gone?
[05:37] Kuro
    Blown up, probably?
[05:39] Noguchi
    What the hell?
[05:40] Noguchi
    Do you wanna come in
    for a drink or something?
[05:43] Kuro
    Nah, I'm tired. Bye.
[05:47] Noguchi
    Seriously?! You take a huge risk
    like this and just waltz off?!
[05:53] Noguchi
    He really did leave.
[05:55] Noguchi
    What is that guy's deal?
[06:02] Yoshida
    A bunch of rejections and rewrites again.
[06:06] Yoshida
    Does Editor Suzuki hate me or something?
[06:10] Yoshida
    My name is Yoshida Akikazu.
[06:13] Yoshida
    I'm a historical novelist.
[06:15] Yoshida
    In the two decades and change since
    becoming a writer, I've had no success,
[06:19] Yoshida
    so now I write speculative fiction.
[06:21] Yoshida
    Alternate history sci-fi stories, in other
    words, in order to make ends meet.
[06:27] Yoshida
    I guess I'll go to bed for tonight.
[06:35] Yoshida
    I really hope someone shows up tonight.
[06:39] Yoshida
    I make a habit of unlocking
    my doors and windows,
[06:44] Yoshida
    and putting an eye mask on,
    before going to bed.
[06:46] Yoshida
    The reason dates back to over ten years ago,
    when I'd just fallen asleep one night...
[06:51] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    Wake up.
[06:53] Yoshida
    I've kept up the habit ever since I woke
    up to a ninja sitting next to my pillow.
[07:06] Yoshida
    He had the kind of bottomless lung capacity
    you'd expect from a practiced throat-singer.
[07:11] Yoshida
    That was what convinced me he was a ninja.
[07:16] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    Close your eyes.
[07:20] (Flashback) Yoshida
    I'm closing them! They're closed!
[07:24] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    December 18, 1996...
[07:28] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    Fifteen terrorists holed up in a Japanese
    embassy, taking 100 hostages,
[07:33] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    including embassy staff and employees
    of various Japanese businesses.
[07:39] Yoshida
    Is he talking about the Japanese
    embassy hostage crisis in Peron?
[07:44] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    The entire time, the Japanese government put
    an emphasis on the safety of the hostages,
[07:49] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    and pressured the Republic to
    take a safety-first approach.
[07:52] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    Four months later, on April 23, 1997, at dawn...
[08:00] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    A special forces unit from the
    Republic of Peron began their raid.
[08:04] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    One hostage, two of the team's operators,
    and all fifteen terrorists were killed.
[08:10] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    That's what the public knows of the incident.
[08:14] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    But an hour before that operation began,
[08:17] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    a team of seven ninja, including myself,
[08:19] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    infiltrated the residence through a
    different underground access point.
[08:21] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    We were able to disarm the
    terrorists without killing them.
[08:25] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    And right when the Republic government was
    being informed of this bloodless solution...
[08:28] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    The raid began.
[08:32] Yoshida
    Why?
[08:33] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    You're wondering why?
[08:35] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    Because the Republic's administration...
    or rather, its president at the time,
[08:40] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    had planned a political assassination
    on one of the hostages.
[08:45] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    The seven of us ended up having to
    fight 200 special forces operators.
[08:50] Yoshida
    Two hundred versus seven?!
    What an incredible disadvantage!
[08:54] Yoshida
    What happened to the ninja?!
    I just have to know!
[08:58] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    No one in Japan knows the truth
    about what happened...
[09:02] (Flashback) Ninja 1
    About the five comrades I lost on that day.
[09:06] Yoshida
    And after he said that,
    the blade across my neck was gone.
[09:11] Yoshida
    I had to wonder if he told me, a writer,
    because he wanted the world to know.
[09:19] Yoshida
    At the time, I was barely
    eking out an existence,
[09:22] Yoshida
    with both my water and gas turned off.
[09:25] Yoshida
    I took the risk of turning the story
    I had been told into a book,
[09:28] Yoshida
    which found a publisher.
[09:30] Yoshida
    The Seven Ninja Liberate the Japanese Embassy 
    sold decently enough,
[09:35] Yoshida
    but readers thought it was speculative
    fiction, and no one took it seriously.
[09:41] Yoshida
    But I believe that it found
    an audience with ninja...
[09:46] (Flashback) Ninja 2
    There are people who know
    that the February 26th incident
[09:48] (Flashback) Ninja 2
    was rooted in something that
    happened on February 22nd,
[09:53] (Flashback) Ninja 2
    but you've probably never heard about
    the Nin-Nin-Ni-Ni-Nin Incident,
[09:56] (Flashback) Ninja 2
    which took place on February 22nd
    of the 22nd year of Heisei, have you?
[10:02] (Flashback) Ninja 3
    The Japanese Paleolithic hoax, right?
[10:05] (Flashback) Ninja 3
    It all started when I was excavating
    some ore to use for ninjutsu...
[10:11] (Flashback) Ninja 4
    You remember those Air Max hunters?
[10:13] (Flashback) Ninja 4
    Well, we're the reason you don't
    hear about them anymore.
[10:17] Yoshida
    And so, in that fashion, these ninja
    would visit me from time to time
[10:20] Yoshida
    to share their exploits, which would
    otherwise be kept to the shadows of history.
[10:25] (Flashback) Sasama
    The hot springs scandal...
[10:28] (Flashback) Sasama
    I was actually the first one to suspect
    something was up with the water quality,
[10:32] (Flashback) Sasama
    and send it in for appraisal.
[10:34] Yoshida
    What is that sound?
[10:36] (Flashback) Yoshida
    And how did you know?
[10:38] (Flashback) Sasama
    I was soaking after a certain mission,
[10:41] (Flashback) Sasama
    and I could tell that the healing
    effects were slower than usual.
[10:46] (Flashback) Hibi
    Ninja High got hit with lightning,
    and what happened to me was frightening!
[10:50] Yoshida
    Is he... rapping?
[10:52] (Flashback) Hibi
    Duel to the death with a homie to graduate,
[10:54] (Flashback) Hibi
    we coulda both died, it woulda been fate.
[10:57] (Flashback) Hibi
    That's what I thought, but then
    he lured me to the perfect spot...
[11:02] (Flashback) Hibi
    I get a bolt to the dome without a fight,
    he gets to finish school and see the light!
[11:08] (Flashback) Hibi
    I get fried, only now here
    after I almost died.
[11:11] (Flashback) Hibi
    Dude gets to complete his graduation arc...
[11:14] (Flashback) Hibi
    I get left to dwell in the dark.
[11:17] (Flashback) Hibi
    Been reborn, so call me in a new way,
[11:20] (Flashback) Hibi
    Miracle Lichtenberg Everyday!
[11:23] (Flashback) Hibi
    Born in Tokyo, from the 2-2,
[11:26] (Flashback) Hibi
    and if you see someone creeping,
    you can bet they a ninja!
[11:32] Yoshida
    I don't think I'll use this one.
[11:36] Yoshida
    It was some ten years after ninja had
    begun telling me about themselves...
[11:43] (Flashback) Yamada
    Wake up.
[11:46] Yoshida
    This ninja was different.
[11:49] (Flashback) Yamada
    Are you the one writing down
    the idle chatter of these shinobi?
[11:54] Yoshida
    "These shinobi"? Is she not one?
[11:58] Yoshida
    The atmosphere was tense.
[12:00] Yoshida
    I was far more frightened than when
    someone had put a blade to my neck,
[12:04] Yoshida
    and my body froze up like
    I had sleep paralysis.
[12:08] (Flashback) Yamada
    Every last ninja on the surface
    will be annihilated.
[12:13] Yoshida
    She's going to wipe out those ninja?! Why?
[12:17] Yoshida
    I thought I'd braced myself to die for asking
    that question, but it didn't come out.
[12:22] Yoshida
    So many ninja had told me about the past,
[12:25] Yoshida
    but this woman was the only one
    who spoke of the future.
[13:00] Nekohira
    Hey. Wake up! I'm hungry!
[13:05] Nekohira
    Man, these boobs are downright criminal.
[13:07] Nekohira
    Look at them jiggle!
[13:11] Kawado
    Come on, sir, that costs extra!
[13:14] Nekohira
    Wait... NIN's ninja lab
    transplanted my brain into a cat.
[13:22] Nekohira
    It looks like my human memories are back.
[13:27] Nekohira
    And... the one who delivered a
    fatal blow to my human body...
[13:34] Nekohira
    was someone from the Kumogakure clan.
[13:41] Nekohira
    I don't think this is the guy who
    did me in, but he's still an enemy.
[13:46] Nekohira
    And I might not be able to
    kill him myself anymore...
[13:51] Nekohira
    but Saruta will avenge me.
[13:56] Kuro
    I don't think so.
[13:59] Nekohira
    He read my mind?!
[14:02] Kuro
    Look, I have an idea what happened to you,
[14:07] Kuro
    but I don't think you're
    gonna be killing me.
[14:10] Kuro
    You should be glad.
    Life as a cat has gotta be carefree.
[14:14] Nekohira
    Oh, this asshole!
[14:17] Nekohira
    Crap, here it comes.
[14:19] Nekohira
    My head's getting hazy...
[14:36] Kuro
    I'm counting on you.
[14:40] Ono
    Hey, Kuro-kun. Good morning.
[14:42] Kuro
    Ono-san. Off to get laid
    first thing in the morning?
[14:46] Kuro
    You keep those working girls busy.
[14:47] Ono
    No! I'm going to my job! Where I work!
[14:51] Ono
    A fight with Yankii High, huh?
[14:54] Ono
    Well, back in my day, those kinda inter-school
    beefs were just the daily routine.
[14:58] Ono
    Got into a few scraps myself.
[15:02] Kuro
    You don't have to lie.
[15:04] Kuro
    Doesn't making up past glory
    like that embarrass you?
[15:08] Ono
    Uh, it's not made up!
[15:11] Kuro
    No, I'm pretty sure it is.
[15:12] Ono
    What makes you so sure?!
[15:14] Ono
    I'm telling you, it happened!
[15:16] Ono
    I'll show you my school album tonight!
    Come by my room!
[15:20] Kuro
    I guess delusions can get so vivid it becomes
    hard to even realize they're false, huh?
[15:24] Ono
    Why are you so damn certain I'm lying?!
[15:28] Ono
    Don't forget to drop by!
[15:30] Kuro
    Sure. If I'm alive.
[15:41] Ono
    No bag, and barefoot...
[15:44] Ono
    It's almost refreshing how
    brazen you are, Kuro-kun.
[15:56] Hibi
    Hey, Kuro. I think this is the
    first time you've ever called me.
[16:00] Kuro
    There's going to be an attack
    on Kodan High School today,
[16:03] Kuro
    but we'll leave that to a separate unit.
[16:05] Hibi
    Which means...
[16:07] Kuro
    We're hitting the real target.
[16:09] Kuro
    Are you ready, Hibi?
[16:18] Hibi
    I guess shuddering in anticipation
    really is a thing, Kuro!
[16:24] Eita
    Oh, damn.
[16:27] Eita
    I'm hanging out with the hottest
    girl in school, Yamada-san!
[16:35] Yoshida
    Suzuki-san's coming to pick up
    the manuscript today...
[16:43] Yoshida
    This sensation... It's the same!
[16:50] Yoshida
    It was her!
[16:52] Yamada
    Oh, Kiryu-kun? It's been so long!
[16:55] Yamada
    Where are you?
[16:57] Yamada
    Space?!
[16:59] Yamada
    That's so cool!
[17:00] Eita
    Kiryu is the most popular
    guy at school, right?
[17:04] Eita
    I guess it makes sense the hottest girl
    would have that kinda social circle.
[17:09] Yamada
    Sure, I'll pass it on.
[17:11] Yamada
    See ya! Hope you have fun.
[17:15] Eita
    Say, Yamada-san... I haven't seen
    Kiryu-kun around since he quit the club.
[17:23] Yamada
    He quit school, I think.
[17:24] Yamada
    Considering he's in space.
[17:26] Yamada
    Seems he wanted to play
    with Kuro-kun, though.
[17:29] Eita
    Space?
[17:31] Eita
    What the hell is she talking about?
[17:36] Eita
    Y'know, I have no idea
    what Kuro-kun is thinking.
[17:39] Eita
    Picking a fight with Yankii High...
[17:41] Eita
    They're so dumb, I hear they dig
    to look up their test scores.
[17:45] Eita
    You might not know about this
    since you're a transfer student,
[17:48] Eita
    but there's a rumor that 70% of the crime
    in Nerima stems from Yankii High.
[17:54] Yankee 1
    Hey!
[17:56] Eita
    Yeah?
[17:58] Yankee 1
    Dude, you've been talking crap
    about our school this whole time.
[18:02] Yankee 2
    Granted, it's all true.
[18:04] Yankee 2
    How about you come with us?
[18:05] Yankee 1
    I mean, we're not exactly in love
    with our alma mater, but...
[18:09] Yankee 1
    Hearing all those blatant insults
    is still annoying, y'know?
[18:14] Yankee 2
    What's an alma mater again?
[18:16] Yankee 1
    Google it, man!
[18:17] Eita
    Um, I'll apologize, so please let me go...
[18:21] Yankee 1
    If apologies were worth anything,
    there'd never be any war, my man.
[18:25] Yankee 1
    Just crack open a history book.
[18:28] Yankee 1
    And if you're admitting you were wrong,
[18:30] Yankee 1
    I'd say compensation comes
    with an apology, y'know?
[18:33] Yamada
    Huh? Eita-kun? What's wrong?
[18:38] Yankee 2
    She's hot!
[18:40] Yankee 1
    This guy was spouting nonsense about
    our school that may or may not be true,
[18:43] Yankee 1
    and ruining its rep.
[18:45] Eita
    Look, I apologized...
[18:47] Yamada
    Eita-kun tends to get a big
    head when he's around me.
[18:51] Yamada
    I'm sorry! Would you forgive him?
[18:54] Yankee 1
    Wait, what? Are you two going out?
[18:57] Yankee 2
    There's no way...
[18:59] Yamada
    I mean, it's embarrassing to hear
    someone come out and ask, but...
[19:04] Yamada
    I think it's fair to say
    we are, right, Eita-kun?
[19:11] Yankee 1
    With a twerp like this? What the hell?
[19:14] Yankee 2
    I shoulda gone to a co-ed school...
[19:18] Yankee 1
    Well, if he's your boyfriend, I'd say
    that calls for collective responsibility!
[19:22] Yankee 1
    How about you show us your
    panties to make up for it?
[19:25] Eita
    What? How does that make sense?
[19:31] Yamada
    Well, if you'll let my trashy
    Eita-kun off the hook...
[19:37] Yamada
    Okay.
[19:39] Yankee 2
    It's okay?!
[19:40] Yankee 1
    Glad I asked, damn.
[19:41] Eita
    Is it, though?!
[19:43] Eita
    And she called me trash...
[19:54] Yamada
    You won't be able to see
    unless you get closer.
[20:11] Eita
    Ow!
[20:29] Yankee 1
    P-Please don't hurt us anymore!
[20:32] Yamada
    Kumogakure Kuro-kun and
    Hibi Miracle-kun and Eita-kun here,
[20:38] Yamada
    and then one other guy... uh...
[20:41] Yamada
    whose name I forgot, I think.
[20:43] Yamada
    But the four of them are going
    to raid your school, okay?
[20:47] Yamada
    So tell all your friends.
[20:52] Yamada
    Come on, now, Eita-kun.
[20:54] Eita
    Y-Yeah...
[20:59] Noguchi
    Kuro-kun told me to stay home yesterday,
[21:02] Noguchi
    but here I am at school.
[21:04] Director
    Excuse me, miss?
[21:06] Director
    I think his name was Kumogakure-kun...
[21:08] Director
    Is he not here yet?
SIGN    Sawada Glass Repair Company
[21:13] Yankee 1
    We really appreciate this, man.
[21:15] Yankee 2
    I think my nose might be broken.
[21:18] Yankee 1
    Seriously, big thanks
    for helping patch us up.
[21:21] Hibi
    So, who got you guys?
[21:24] Manager
    It's been a while, young master Kumogakure.
[21:27] Kuro
    Do you have weapons for me?
[21:30] Manager
    Of course.
[21:32] Manager
    It's nearly time. We're all counting on you.
[21:36] Manager
    You can put it on any finger you like.
[21:40] Manager
    The GPS installed on it will make
    sure a weapon is sent to you,
[21:44] Manager
    no matter where you are.
[21:47] Manager
    Do you think you can win this one?
[21:49] Kuro
    I'd say it's even odds.
[21:51] Yankee 1
    Oh, yeah, it was this tall dude
    with his hair slicked back.
[21:54] Yankee 1
    He just laid into us when our guard was down!
[21:58] Yankee 1
    And he said something about some guys
    named Kumogakure and Hibi
[22:02] Yankee 1
    and a few more coming
    to our school to rumble!
[22:08] Hibi
    I think that means the two of us.
[22:12] Kuro
    Let's go, Hibi.
[22:14] Kuro
    You two are coming, too.
SIGN    Episode 9: "I'm Gonna Go Down in Shinobi History"
[23:55] Kawado
    Speaking of names, most of the guys who
    come to my place use such obvious aliases.
[24:00] Kuro
    I wonder if Ono-san would use
    something like "Amano-san."
[24:02] Kawado
    Oh, man, I bet he does all kinds
    of nasty stuff as Amano-san!
[24:04] Ono
    Could you two not turn my name into a joke?
[24:06] Kuro
    Oh, it's Amano-san who hits up the
    sex workers first thing in the morning.
[24:08] Ono
    My name is Ono!

E9 - I'm Gonna Go Down in Shinobi History
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Nice
    to
    meet
    you
    Ugly
SIGN    Idiot
SIGN    4 Lyfe
SIGN    Trash
SIGN    Learning is
    fundamental
SIGN    I'm the strongest Invincible
SIGN    Takuro
SIGN    Bald
    Boss
SIGN    Furinkazan
SIGN    Demon For Real
SIGN    Dumb
    ass
SIGN    Don't fuck with me!
[00:12] Eita
    Ugh, this is really bad...
[00:16] Eita
    I'm actually at Yankii High.
[00:19] Yamada
    Eita-kun.
[00:22] Yamada
    Hand.
[00:24] Eita
    Huh?
[00:25] Eita
    Oh, sure.
[00:27] Yamada
    Okay, here goes.
[00:30] Eita
    Huh?
[00:34] Yamada
    Help!
[00:36] Yamada
    Someone! Help me!
[00:38] Eita
    What the hell is happening right now?!
[00:41] Eita
    Settle down, Eita. Keep your cool, Eita!
[00:46] Eita
    I've got a very unique
    situation going on here.
[00:49] Eita
    Let's compartmentalize
    while also avoiding reality...
[00:52] Eita
    If I focus purely on the positives
    for me, then right now...
[00:57] Eita
    the fact remains that I am groping the boobs
    of the school's hottest girl, Yamada-san.
[01:03] Yamada
    Someone!
[01:06] Eita
    Huh... Feels funny, though.
[01:11] Eita
    Yeah, I was expecting something
    like Kawado-san's boobs...
[01:14] Eita
    Not that I've touched them, but I expected
    something like... the softness of rich soil.
[01:21] Eita
    But these aren't like that!
[01:24] Eita
    They're hard! Like rocks!
[01:26] Eita
    I feel a tension, like I'm
    rock-climbing without a lifeline.
[01:29] Eita
    These things are my only hope for survival!
[01:34] Eita
    Not that I've ever gone rock-climbing.
[01:37] Kawarada
    What's this?
[01:38] Kawarada
    Hey, kid! What are you doing?
[01:41] Eita
    Uh, well, this is actually...
[01:46] Yamada
    Help!
[01:51] Eita
    I can't shake the feeling that I've stuck my
    nose into something extremely dangerous.
SIGN    Episode 9: "I'm Gonna Go Down in Shinobi History"
[03:31] Ranran
    The sun feels so distant...
[03:34] Ranran
    It really is a subterranean fortress.
[03:36] Ranran
    They play up the Nin-Nin theme by
    claiming 22 basement levels, but...
[03:39] Ranran
    The truth is, nobody knows
    how deep it actually goes.
[03:42] Ranran
    I wonder how many ninja will
    be delving into this hellhole
[03:46] Ranran
    to endure nightmare missions today...
[03:58] Taira
    Working overnight?
[03:59] Ranran
    Hey, Manager Taira.
    This'll be night three for me.
[04:03] Ranran
    Gotta say, things are already looking bad.
[04:05] Ranran
    Their gear outperforms our
    Marishiten in every way.
[04:09] Ranran
    Considering our latest model is 4.0,
[04:12] Ranran
    I'd say they're on 5.0.
[04:15] Taira
    I don't get technobabble. Any weaknesses?
[04:18] Ranran
    Nope.
[04:19] Ranran
    First of all, the latest
    model of Marishiten, 4.0,
[04:23] Ranran
    was designed with a focus on mobility,
    with domestic usage in mind.
[04:26] Ranran
    It's a lightly armed model.
[04:27] Ranran
    Its bullet- and blade-proofing
    aren't that strong.
[04:30] Ranran
    Compared to the 3.5, a heavy-armor
    type developed for use during war,
[04:35] Ranran
    its design principles are different.
[04:37] Ranran
    And then there's the enemy's new model,
[04:39] Ranran
    which has all the strengths of both,
    and none of the weaknesses.
[04:42] Ranran
    I find myself once again wondering
    how their tech manages to outdo ours.
[04:48] Taira
    Break it down in simple terms.
[04:50] Ranran
    Look here.
[04:53] Ranran
    It took analysis from the
    Ninja Lab's Rappa supercomputer
[04:56] Ranran
    to get us something more substantial.
[04:59] Ranran
    The suit takes a blow from a
    super-high-strength NIN ninja sword,
[05:03] Ranran
    but its impact protection
    system is strong enough
[05:05] Ranran
    that it doesn't even leave a scratch.
[05:07] Ranran
    It even maintains its invisibility.
[05:11] Taira
    What else?
[05:14] Ranran
    Manger Taira... If we're going to do this,
    we should head to the nap room.
[05:20] Taira
    And you're gonna update
    the front lines with this intel?
[05:22] Ranran
    Yep. About to send the data
    to Chief Ninja Kato...
[05:28] Ranran
    Actually, I might not be lucky enough
    to send it in time for the UN attack.
[05:34] Ranran
    Or maybe a portion of the
    data could be corrupted...
[05:39] Ranran
    What do you think?
[05:42] Taira
    Go ahead and send everything to him.
[05:45] Taira
    If he still dies, then that's that.
[05:47] Ranran
    Sure, by your command.
[05:51] Ranran
    I don't mind Chief Ninja Kato,
    but I really hope Onikobe dies.
[05:56] Ranran
    That said... something about this is bugging me.
[06:01] Ranran
    UN's invisibility suit is clearly over-spec.
[06:06] Ranran
    Like it has some other purpose...
[06:13] Ozu
    Hey, Hachiya-kun? Ozu here.
[06:15] Ozu
    Sorry to bug you during a mission.
    You good to talk?
SIGN    Nurse's Office
[06:19] Hachiya
    It's nice to hear from you, Master.
[06:22] Hachiya
    I'm good. I was just
    finishing morning practice.
[06:25] Ozu
    There's a NIN Alert,
[06:28] Ozu
    so Kodan High School is about
    to become a combat zone.
[06:32] Hachiya
    I know.
[06:34] Ozu
    Normally, you wouldn't be on
     the scene for something like this.
[06:38] Ozu
    I'd rather pull you out ASAP, but...
[06:41] Hachiya
    Considering whose grandson I am...
[06:44] Hachiya
    It's important that I show up in the field
    so the other genin don't get unruly.
[06:50] Ozu
    Well, if you do encounter an enemy,
    be sure to run for it.
[06:54] Ozu
    Push comes to shove,
[06:55] Ozu
    use the Rear Support Maneuvers
    Division 2 girl you're with as a shield.
[07:00] Hachiya
    You don't have to tell me. I know.
[07:03] Hachiya
    And I fully intend to, Master.
[07:07] Ozu
    You gotta survive, kid.
    You're my ticket to getting promoted.
[07:13] Ozu
    The grandson of Tara,
    one of the seven NIN leaders.
[07:18] Suzuki
    Yo, Ninja Lab's loosest &@$$^,
    what the hell kept you?
[07:22] Suzuki
    What the fuck am I dealing with here?
[07:24] Suzuki
    Your message? Yeah, I read it. It was bullshit.
[07:27] Suzuki
    All you did was yap about how
    good the enemy's weapons are.
[07:30] Suzuki
    I want weaknesses, damn it.
[07:34] Suzuki
    The fuck you mean, "there are none"?!
[07:36] Homeroom Teacher
    You there!
[07:38] Homeroom Teacher
    The use of smartphones on
    school grounds is prohibited.
[07:41] Suzuki
    What did you say?
[07:44] Suzuki
    He's not quite Yoshida-sensei,
    but he's rugged, too!
[07:47] Suzuki
    His old man smell isn't bad, either.
[07:50] Homeroom Teacher
    Come on, now...
[07:52] Suzuki
    I'm so sorry, Sensei.
[07:54] Suzuki
    My maternal grandmother doesn't have
    long left... and I just had to talk to her.
[08:00] Homeroom Teacher
    Well, in that case, I guess...
[08:03] Suzuki
    I really appreciate it.
[08:04] Homeroom Teacher
    Just don't make it obvious.
[08:06] Suzuki
    Okay.
[08:08] Suzuki
    Come on, &@$$^ cheese,
    you gotta have something for me.
[08:11] Suzuki
    This is why everyone thinks
    the Ninja Lab is useless!
[08:15] Ranran
    Come on, Senpai, don't be mean.
[08:18] Ranran
    I don't have any &@$$^ cheese.
    I'll even let you smell to make sure.
[08:22] Ranran
    I hate to say it, but NIN is at a
     complete technological disadvantage.
[08:27] Ranran
    You're the only one who's ever fought
    that new UN suit and survived.
[08:33] Ranran
    I don't think it was a coincidence
    you dodged that first strike.
[08:37] Ranran
    Is there anything that you noticed about it?
[08:41] Ranran
    Maybe in terms of smell?
[08:43] Suzuki
    Smell, huh?
[08:44] Suzuki
    I wasn't really paying attention,
    since it didn't smell like old man.
[08:48] Ranran
    By the way, Senpai,
    is Onikobe-senpai with you?
[08:51] Suzuki
    Yeah, she's right next to me.
[08:56] Ranran
    This school will be your tomb!
[08:58] Ranran
    Die, Onikobe!
[09:01] Onikobe
    Does she hate me or something?
[09:04] Suzuki
    Considering you're the one who popped
    her eye, I doubt she likes you.
[09:09] Onikobe
    I only did it because she was annoying.
SIGN    Chief Ninja Kato
    Call
[09:13] Kato
    Onikobe. Suzuki. Are you in position?
[09:16] Onikobe
    Yes, Chief Ninja Kato. We're ready.
[09:20] Kato
    Good. Don't even consider trying
    to take the enemy alive.
[09:24] Kato
    Their death is our top priority.
[09:26] Kato
    During the operation,
    you will not be accountable for anything
[09:31] Kato
    that you do in front of a Ninja Tribunal.
[09:34] Kato
    The ROE have been lifted.
[09:44] Kato
    In addition, for this mission,
    I will be joining you.
[09:52] Azuma
    Damn it, Eita, you little shit...
[09:55] Azuma
    My dad is Azuma, the former*
    Nerima assemblyman!
[09:58] Azuma
    Don't think you'll get away
    with what you did.
[10:02] Azuma
    The bullying begins anew today.
[10:16] Azuma
    I wonder what I should do to him...
[10:19] Azuma
    Maybe for... a start...
[10:25] Azuma
    Huh?
[10:27] Azuma
    Why...
[10:29] Azuma
    Why can I see... my own... back?
[10:33] Azuma
    Wha...
[10:35] Saruta
    All good. I killed someone and kept my cool.
[10:38] Saruta
    Hell, I enjoyed it.
[10:40] Saruta
    Nekohira... I'm gonna go
    down in shinobi history.
[10:48] Saruta
    Will I be able to collect a hundred heads?
[10:56] Noguchi
    I've been standing here this whole
    time and he hasn't said a thing.
[11:00] Noguchi
    It's so awkward.
[11:03] Noguchi
    Come on... Gotta talk about something...
[11:06] Noguchi
    H-Hey, Director, you've been
    working here for a long time, right?
[11:11] Director
    I have.
[11:12] Noguchi
    I heard rumors about some caves
    in the woods behind the school.
[11:20] Noguchi
    Sorry!
[11:23] Director
    Well.
[11:25] Director
    It looks like both NIN and Rear Support
    Maneuvers Division 2 have given up on this place.
[11:30] Noguchi
    U-Um...
[11:34] Director
    There are caves, but the entrance
    is on school grounds.
[11:38] Noguchi
    Huh?
[11:40] Director
    You should use them to escape.
[11:42] Director
    The campus is already surrounded.
    It'd be dangerous to leave any other way.
[11:48] Director
    Don't get swept up
    with the other students.
[11:51] Director
    Survive, and tell people about this disaster.
[11:56] Noguchi
    What the hell?
    Both the director and Kuro-kun...
[12:00] Noguchi
    What's going to happen?
[12:04] Ranran
    Suzuki-senpai!
[12:06] Ranran
    UN's on the scene.
[12:08] Suzuki
    I need to know the situation, now.
[12:10] Ranran
    'Kay!
[12:12] Ranran
    Tengen, our surveillance satellite,
    has the footage.
[12:15] Ranran
    There's a decapitated male student.
[12:19] Ranran
    Looks like he's already on school grounds.
[12:22] Ranran
    Caution advised.
[12:24] Suzuki
    Roger.
[12:25] Ranran
    If either of you
[12:26] Ranran
    can land a GPS marker on UN during battle,
[12:31] Ranran
    Escape will be able to kill them
    via a saturated bombing attack.
[12:36] Suzuki
    And if we can't?
[12:38] Ranran
    In that case, we'll use the GPS coordinates
    for the two of you as targets.
[12:43] Ranran
    This will also be the case
    if you two are incapacitated.
[12:47] Suzuki
    So we'd better kill UN ourselves, then.
[12:51] Suzuki
    Time for work, Onikobe.
[12:53] Teacher
    Lunch break is over!
[12:57] Teacher
    Anyone still out here?
[13:16] Saruta
    Man, they don't actually roll that well.
[13:19] Saruta
    School, huh? Never did like it.
[13:22] Saruta
    Whole place is suffocating.
[13:25] Saruta
    I remember during ninja school,
    on my way to class,
[13:28] Saruta
    I'd kick any stones in the road...
[13:32] Saruta
    Always had my gaze downcast.
[13:35] Rear Ender 1
    Hey, Fatty-take!
[13:37] Rear Ender 1
    How the hell do you come back with a somen bun
[13:39] Rear Ender 1
    when I specifically asked for a yakisoba bun?
[13:41] Rear Ender 1
    You see the problem?
[13:43] Fatty-take
    It's just... when lunch break is almost over...
[13:46] Fatty-take
    the most popular stuff is sold out—
[13:48] Rear Ender 1
    Did I ask you for excuses, Fatty-take?
[13:51] Rear Ender 2
    She's been in a real mood ever since
    Mako-chan took up with that NIN guy.
[13:56] Rear Ender 1
    This creep looks like he'd
    love it if I slugged him.
[13:59] Fatty-take
    N-No, not at all! Be my guest!
[14:11] Rear Ender 1
    Is this NIN?
[14:13] Rear Ender 2
    What's going on here?
[14:14] Rear Ender 2
    Marishiten that are used domestically
    shouldn't be able to go fully invisible!
[14:22] Rear Ender 1
    Don't move, Fatty-take.
[14:23] Fatty-take
    R-Right!
[14:24] Rear Ender 1
    Contact Mako-chan right now!
[14:27] Rear Ender 2
    Right!
[14:35] Fatty-take
    H-Huh? You... don't weigh much, do you?
[15:01] Saruta
    You get a ten-second head start.
[15:03] Saruta
    If I catch you again, you're dead.
[15:09] Saruta
    That should kick the panic off.
[15:12] Saruta
    First step is to sow chaos in the school.
[15:16] Saruta
    They used to have me running errands, too...
[15:20] (Flashback) Nekohira
    Y'know, when I become a jonin,
[15:24] (Flashback) Nekohira
    I'm gonna ban the use of cats as weapons.
[15:28] (Flashback) Saruta
    Nekohira... do you honestly
    think you can make jonin?
[15:34] (Flashback) Nekohira
    What's the harm in talking
    about our... dreams?
[15:43] (Flashback) Nekohira
    Ow!
[15:45] (Flashback) Juro
    Saruta. Nekohira.
[15:48] (Flashback) Juro
    Didn't I tell you guys to go buy
    hyorogan at the school store?
[15:55] (Flashback) Juro
    You've got thirty seconds
    to buy it and get back here.
[15:58] (Flashback) Juro
    If you can't manage that...
[16:01] (Flashback) Juro
    you're dead.
[16:04] Saruta
    I'll never forget those eyes.
[16:06] Saruta
    This calls for more... louder... chaos.
[16:15] Saruta
    Okay, everyone in your seats!
[16:18] Saruta
    Oh, I guess you're already sitting.
[16:21] Saruta
    Before class starts, your teacher
    has something to tell you.
[16:25] Saruta
    It turns out he left his body
    in the shoe lockers!
[16:31] Saruta
    Well, shit. Is this conformity in action?
[16:35] Saruta
    Not gonna react? Even a little?
[16:38] Saruta
    Are your brains working?
[16:40] Saruta
    Do these kids not know how to
    think or act for themselves?
[16:45] Saruta
    Oh, well. I blame the system.
[16:53] Students
    Something's there! Something is in there!
[16:56] Students
    This is bad!
[16:59] Students
    Tae-chan!
[17:09] Girl
    Get a move on already! Go!
[17:11] Boy
    Shut the fuck up!
[17:25] Saruta
    Down we go...
[17:38] Saruta
    Aw, man. The boys' restroom?
[17:43] Saruta
    You're not a lucky kid, are you?
[17:47] Saruta
    Well, it is what it is.
[17:58] Saruta
    Never mind. You get to live.
[18:02] Saruta
    You won't have to eat in the can anymore.
[18:05] Saruta
    Hell, as the sole survivor, the press
    is gonna be banging down your door.
[18:15] Balding Teacher
    I don't think I'm getting any signal.
SIGN    Faculty Room
[18:18] Homeroom
    You, too?
[18:19] Fatty-take
    Excuse me...
[18:20] Homeroom
    Come on, Fatty-take!
[18:22] Homeroom
    Class is already—
[18:25] Fatty-take
    It's just... I-I think an invisible man...
    is killing everybody.
[18:32] Homeroom
    Don't move, Fatty-take!
[18:34] Students
    No more!
[18:36] Students
    I don't wanna die!
    I don't wanna die!
[18:38] Suzuki
    Shit. The panic's already set in.
[18:46] VP
    This is the vice principal
    with a message for all students.
[18:50] VP
    I've been informed that there is
    an intruder on school grounds.
[18:54] VP
    For safety's sake, all students are
    to evacuate to the courtyard.
[19:00] Suzuki
    That's just what he wants.
[19:02] VP
    Please, do not rush,
    follow your teachers' directions and—
[19:08] Director
    This message is for all students.
[19:10] Director
    The intruder on school grounds
    was a false report.
[19:13] VP
    Wh-Who is that talking?!
[19:13] Director
    Please remain in your classrooms.
[19:16] Director
    I repeat, the reporters
    of an intruder were false.
[19:20] Students
    What the hell?
[19:20] Director
    Please remain in your classrooms.
[19:22] Students
    Who made the report?
[19:23] Students
    What a pain in the ass...
[19:25] Director
    This message is for NIN.
    The UN has moved to a different building.
[19:30] Director
    If you don't pincer him, he'll get away.
[19:33] Director
    If you're interested in working together,
[19:35] Director
    head to the blackboard eraser
    cleaning station in the hall.
[19:39] Director
    You'll be able to reply from there.
[19:42] Suzuki
    I guess you want us to
     team up, Clairaudience?
[19:46] Director
    We don't really have a choice.
[19:49] Suzuki
    It's been twenty years since
    he was sent out on loan
[19:51] Suzuki
    from NIN to the Ministry of Welfare's
    Rear Support Maneuvers Division 2.
[19:54] Suzuki
    I can't even tell whose side he's on anymore.
[19:58] Director
    Your ability to search for the enemy
    on school grounds is going to be limited,
[20:02] Director
    and he knows that.
[20:04] Suzuki
    Tell me one thing.
[20:07] Suzuki
    You're an extremely rare case:
    a nukenin who's been allowed live in public.
[20:13] Suzuki
    You've been here for twenty years. Why?
[20:17] Suzuki
    What's your reason?
[20:19] Director
    Watching out for children as they grow up
    became my reason for living.
[20:25] Director
    Is that a good enough answer?
[20:30] Suzuki
    Honestly, hearing about ancient history
    from you is a waste of time.
[20:33] Suzuki
    Will you be handling the pincer attack?
[20:35] Director
    I'll be backing you up with my ears.
[20:38] Director
    You've got that troublemaker
    for a boss, haven't you?
[20:41] Director
    Bring him in as soon as you can.
[20:44] Suzuki
    So he says.
[20:46] Onikobe
    You heard him.
    What do you say, Chief Ninja Kato?
[20:51] Kato
    I'm already headed there.
[20:54] Kato
    Seems like Clairaudience is just
    going to be listening from on high...
[21:01] Saruta
    Sounds like the clairaudience user
    and the NIN agents have linked up.
[21:05] Saruta
    I expected as much.
[21:13] Kuro
    Hey, you.
[21:16] Noheji
    Kuro-san? Hibi-san?
[21:18] Kuro
    What was your name again?
[21:21] Noheji
    You mean you didn't know?!
[21:23] Kuro
    No.
[21:25] Kuro
    You didn't seem important,
    so I didn't think I'd need to.
[21:27] Noheji
    Damn, man...
[21:29] Noheji
    I'm Noheji!
[21:30] Yankii Duo
    Noheji?
[21:32] Hibi
    That's a weird name...
[21:34] Hibi
    How's Kuro gonna play this?
[21:36] Kuro
    Noheji... 10,895th place...
[21:40] Kuro
    There are approximately 670 in the country,
    most of which are in Tohoku.
[21:46] Kuro
    To think I'd meet one in Nerima...
[21:48] Kuro
    Can I please shake your hand?
[21:49] Noheji
    Uh, sure...
[21:52] Kuro
    You coulda told me sooner!
[21:55] Noheji
    W-Well, I kinda thought you
    were already in the school.
[21:59] Hibi
    Why?
[21:59] Noheji
    Well... uh... I saw someone knocked out.
[22:05] Yankii 1
    That's Kawarada, the guidance counselor.
[22:07] Yankii 1
    He's a second-dan in karate.
[22:11] Eita
    Hey!
[22:14] Eita
    It's me, Eita!
[22:16] Eita
    Save me!
SIGN    Episode 10: "A Maiden's Chest Is a Precious Thing"
[23:55] Kato
    Onikobe is rare enough
    that it doesn't even rank
[23:58] Kato
    among the most common
    Japanese family names.
[24:00] Onikobe
    Which do you think is better,
    a rare name or a common one?
[24:03] Kato
    No clue.
[24:04] Onikobe
    If rare ones are worse,
    I'd be extremely weak.
[24:06] Onikobe
    Maybe I should start going by Sato?
[24:08] Kato
    You really shouldn't.

E10 - DAYS GONE BY AND DAYS TO COME
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:19] Yamada
    I don't know how long I've been here.
[00:27] Yamada
    When the time they call "morning" arrives,
    I leave my room and go up some stairs.
[00:34] Yamada
    I keep climbing until I lose
    track of how long it's been,
[00:36] Yamada
    and then, at the top...
[00:50] Yamada
    A fight starts with other children
    who also went up stairs like those.
[01:00] Yamada
    If you're weak, you just get beat on.
    If you fall, they keep hitting you.
[01:04] Yamada
    If they hit you for long enough,
    you stop moving.
[01:08] Yamada
    He's not moving anymore.
[01:12] Yamada
    Hit them before they hit you.
[01:15] Yamada
    To make your enemies stop moving,
    you have to be stronger than them.
[01:19] Yamada
    If you're strong, you get to leave.
[01:24] Yamada
    When the time called "night" comes,
[01:26] Yamada
    those who can still move go down
    the stairs, back to their rooms.
[01:35] Yamada
    Morning and night repeat.
    We go from using our fists to wooden swords...
[01:41] Yamada
    From wooden swords to real ones.
[01:46] Yamada
    And then, I was the last one
    who could still move.
SIGN    Episode 10 "A Maiden's Chest Is a Precious Thing"
[03:45] Ranran
    Like it has some other purpose...
[03:49] Saruta
    This calls for more chaos.
[03:57] Kato
    In addition, for this mission,
    I will be joining you.
[04:01] Student F
    I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die!
[04:02] (Flashback) Suzuki
    The panic's already set in.
[04:06] (Flashback) Director
    Watching out for children as they grow up
    became my reason for living.
[04:12] Director
    Is that a good enough answer?
[04:14] (Flashback) Saruta
    Sounds like the clairaudience user
    and the NIN agents have linked up.
[04:17] (Flashback) Saruta
    I expected as much.
[04:24] Yankee 1
    That's Kawarada, the guidance counselor.
[04:27] Yankee 1
    He's a second-dan in karate.
[04:30] Eita
    Hey!
[04:32] Eita
    It's me, Eita!
[04:35] Eita
    Save me!
[04:41] Yankee 1
    Hey, it's him.
[04:43] Yankee 2
    What's he doing on the roof?
[04:46] Kuro
    Well, until we get to the roof,
    I'd like to discuss your family name in detail.
[04:52] Noheji
    Uh... there's not that much to tell.
[04:57] Eita
    They seem pretty relaxed,
    all things considered.
[05:43] Director
    This message is for all students.
[05:45] Director
    The intruder on school
    grounds was a false report.
[05:47] Director
    Any students in the halls are
    to return to their classrooms.
[05:51] Director
    I repeat, the intruder on school
    grounds was a false report.
[05:56] Director
    Any students in the halls are
    to return to their classrooms.
[05:58] Saruta
    Looks like that clairaudience dickhead
    put a damper on the students' panicking.
[06:03] Male Student 1
    What the heck is that?
[06:05] Male Student 1
    A robot? Is this for TV?
[06:11] Saruta
    Hey, it's the Cube!
[06:14] Saruta
    They actually started deploying them, huh?
[06:16] Saruta
    And domestically, too! All for little old me.
[06:19] Saruta
    I'm really... touched!
[06:27] Saruta
    Now, then... I'm feeling warmed up enough!
[06:30] Saruta
    I hope I run into that NIN chick soon!
[06:34] Saruta
    I'm ready to die in the process,
    but I'm hoping to have a bit more fun first.
[06:44] Hibi
    What the hell is their deal?
[06:45] Yankee 1
    They're first-years, I think, but...
    I don't have a clue.
[06:52] Yankee 1
    Uh, isn't this...
[06:54] Yankee 2
    Oh, yeah, I know what you mean! It's, uh...
[06:56] Noheji
    I think it's those three monkeys.
    Y'know, see no evil, hear no evil...
[07:01] Yankee 1
    Yeah, that!
[07:02] Yankee 1
    Damn, dude, you're pretty smart.
[07:04] Noheji
    It's actually pretty common knowledge.
[07:07] Yankee 1
    So why are the first-years doing it, though?
[07:11] Yankee 1
    Hey, you! What's going on here?
[07:13] Yankee 2
    Come on, you idiot.
    He's the "speak no evil" monkey.
[07:17] Yankee 1
    Oh, right.
[07:19] Yankee 2
    Hey, you! What happened?
[07:21] Yankee 1
    Uh, he obviously hears no evil.
[07:23] Yankee 1
    What are you, stupid?
[07:25] Yankee 2
    Oh, good point.
[07:26] Yankee 1
    What the hell is this?
[07:28] Yankee 3
    Sorry! I didn't see!
[07:29] Yankee 4
    And I didn't hear!
[07:31] Yankee1+2
    These guys are useless!
[07:43] Hibi
    Kuro.
[07:46] Hibi
    I want to fight the UN first.
[07:52] Hibi
    I want to see how far I can go.
[07:57] Kuro
    This is where you get off, Noheji.
[08:00] Kuro
    If you get bored,
    you can fight the punks downstairs.
[08:03] Noheji
    Honestly, I don't have a clue what's going on.
[08:06] Noheji
    So I think I'll just wait.
[08:18] Kuro
    I mean, sure, it can't compare
    to a name like Noheji...
[08:22] Kuro
    But "Hibi Miracle" is pretty incredible, too.
[08:26] Kuro
    Have some confidence.
[08:27] Hibi
    Y-You think so?
[08:32] Kuro
    Take the necktie off, Hibi.
[08:34] Hibi
    Good point.
[08:35] Kuro
    Don't want the UN choking you out.
[08:37] Hibi
    The same goes for you!
[08:39] Kuro
    I'll be fine.
[08:40] Hibi
    Oh, since we're doing this,
    maybe we should be in full shinobi getup.
[08:46] Kuro
    This is gonna be your first and
    last big spotlight. Suit yourself.
[08:50] Hibi
    Dude, don't jinx me.
[08:53] Yamada
    Hey...
[08:56] Yamada
    What're you two even doing?
[08:58] Yamada
    The fight's already started
    at Kodan High School.
[09:03] Hibi
    I couldn't sense her at all.
[09:07] Yamada
    Who's first?
[09:12] Yamada
    I wouldn't mind both at once.
[09:18] Teo
    Titty lady! Titty lady! Titty lady! Titty lady!
[09:23] Kawado
    What?
[09:25] Teo
    I wanted to ask for something...
[09:27] Kawado
    What is it? You wanna see my tits again?
[09:30] Teo
    Well, as far as that goes...
[09:32] Teo
    I mean, I can kinda see them from where I am,
[09:35] Teo
    and I've had my fill, so that's cool.
[09:37] Kawado
    Wow. Rude. What is it, then?
[09:39] Teo
    Seems to be a bit of an emergency,
[09:42] Teo
    so I'd like you to detach me from this frame
    and start up my engine, please.
[09:47] Kawado
    Yeah, sure.
[09:49] Kawado
    But can't you start your own engine?
[09:55] Kawado
    Hey, Shinobu.
[09:59] Kawado
    You're pretty chatty today, huh?
[10:01] Kawado
    Not that I can tell what you're saying.
[10:03] Teo
    Sounds like he wants to ride me.
[10:06] Kawado
    You understand cats?!
[10:09] Teo
    Well, y'know. I am an AI.
[10:16] Teo
    You've seen some shit, too, huh?
[10:19] Teo
    Got it. Hop on!
[10:21] Kawado
    What'd he say?
[10:22] Teo
    I mean, it's kinda confidential.
[10:25] Kawado
    It is?!
[10:28] Teo
    There you go, just like that!
    Now give it a big tug!
[10:33] Kawado
    What kind of motorcycle has a rope start?!
[10:37] Teo
    It's what all the latest models
    are equipped with.
[10:41] Kawado
    Oh, Shinobu, I don't think that's gonna work.
[10:46] Teo
    You don't need to worry about him.
[10:51] Teo
    Well, I'm off!
[10:53] Pedestrian
    Did a motorcycle just talk?!
    On its own?! With a cat riding it?!
[10:57] Kawado
    I have no idea what's going on, but be safe!
[11:02] Female Student 2
    I'm wiped. They should just
    cancel classes for today.
[11:05] Female 'Student 3
    They said there's someone trespassing.
    Let's go back to class.
[11:09] Male Student 3
    Hey, where'd the robot go?!
[11:11] Male Student 3
    Holy crap, there it is!
[11:14] Female Student 2
    That robot's made of cardboard. Kinda lame.
[11:18] Female Student 3
    Maybe the third-years made
    it for the culture festival.
[11:20] Female Student 2
    They did?! That is lame.
[11:28] Kato
    RWS, open.
[11:33] Kato
    No warning shots. Fire on anyone
    who leaves the building.
[11:37] Female Student 5
    Hey, something came out.
[11:39] Female Student 4
    What's with all the delivery trucks, anyway?
[11:41] Director
    Any students in the halls
    are to return to class at once.
[11:43] Female Student 5
    Dunno.
SIGN    Infirmary
[11:45] Director
    I repeat, any students in the halls
    are to return to class at once.
[11:48] Mako
    Do you think it's your enemy, Hachiya-kun?
[11:51] Mako
    Should we escape?
[11:53] Hachiya
    I'd like to, if we can.
[11:57] Hachiya
    But NIN has put a barricade around
    the perimeter. I think we're trapped.
[12:01] Hachiya
    It'd be safer to stay in the building.
[12:03] Mako
    Then I'll call my friends,
    and the three of us can protect you!
[12:09] Hachiya
    I'm sorry, but I got a message...
[12:12] Hachiya
    "I think your friends are already dead."
[12:18] Mako
    Joining Rear Support Maneuvers Division 2
    means being prepared for any outcome.
[12:25] Mako
    We were just a ragtag team.
    Not great friends or anything...
[12:35] Mako
    But I want to avenge them.
[12:38] Hachiya
    Okay.
[12:40] Director
    There's movement in the southern building.
[12:43] Director
    An attack near 2-4.
    The students fled from there.
[12:47] Director
    Your boss is pretty impressive.
[12:50] Director
    With the robot standing in the courtyard,
[12:52] Director
    it can prevent the enemy
    from cutting directly across.
[12:55] Director
    And if his target is the two of you,
[12:58] Director
    head to the connecting
    hall on the second floor.
[13:00] Suzuki
    Got it.
[13:02] Director
    I'll update you on any new movement.
[13:05] Onikobe
    Hey.
[13:07] Onikobe
    There are two connecting halls.
[13:09] Suzuki
    I know.
[13:10] Onikobe
    Those are 50/50 odds.
[13:13] Onikobe
    I'd say the best move is to try
    to pin him down between us.
[13:16] Onikobe
    But dividing our strength
    could mean we both fail.
[13:19] Suzuki
    Don't really have a lot of options, though.
[13:22] Suzuki
    If I find him, I need you to back me up ASAP.
[13:39] Male Student 4
    This sucks so bad.
[13:43] Male Student 4
    A foreigner?
[13:44] Male Student 5
    She's so cute.
[13:46] Suzuki
    Ugh, the smell of young men.
    Makes my nose wanna fall off.
[13:51] Suzuki
    The girls reek just as bad.
[13:56] Suzuki
    The enemy's probably on the opposite end...
[13:58] Homeroom Teacher
    Hey, people!
[14:00] Homeroom Teacher
    The teachers are trying to confirm whether
    or not this intruder report is real,
[14:06] Homeroom Teacher
    so head back to your classrooms!
[14:08] Male Student
    Sir, isn't the robot in the
    courtyard trespassing?
[14:12] Homeroom Teacher
    We'll look into that, too!
    Now get a move on!
[14:16] Suzuki
    The rugged teacher!
[14:17] Suzuki
    Maybe I'll go get a quick whiff.
[14:20] Homeroom Teacher
    Come on, get back to your classrooms!
[14:29] E Female Student
    Wha...
[14:31] Onikobe
    No! Behind you!
[14:35] Homeroom Teacher
    Now, you, I don't know what class you're in...
[14:48] Saruta
    Suzuki. You'll go last.
[14:52] Saruta
    Right now...
[14:54] Saruta
    Is you, Onikobe!
[14:58] Saruta
    Sure! Close those eyes!
[15:13] Kato
    He's made contact with Onikobe.
[15:17] Ranran
    Here we go!
[15:18] Ranran
    But this isn't good enough.
    Not enough for accurate fire from Escape.
[15:23] Ranran
    Scrap for a bit and buy me some time, okay?
[15:26] Ranran
    That strength is the only
    thing you're good for.
[15:32] Saruta
    Aw, come on!
[15:35] Saruta
    Is that all you've got, Onikobe?!
[15:57] Onikobe
    Ninja Chief Kato.
[16:05] Saruta
    You guys actually whipped out
    the strongest war machine
[16:08] Saruta
    you're allowed to use domestically,
    the Cube, all for me!
[16:12] Saruta
    For a little ol' nukenin like me!
[16:15] Saruta
    Aw, I'm downright honored!
[16:18] Saruta
    You need to be at least a
    chunin to operate this baby.
[16:21] Saruta
    Which means... if that's
    Onikobe in the Marishiten,
[16:25] Saruta
    then it's Ninja Chief Kato!
[16:27] Kato
    Shut up.
[16:33] Kato
    Onikobe, see to the wounded.
    Pull back for now.
[16:37] Onikobe
    Sir.
[16:49] Students
    What the hell?
[16:50] Students
    What is going on?
[16:59] Onikobe
    If you get to the Ninja Lab
    fast enough, it can be reattached.
[17:01] Onikobe
    You're out of action for now.
[17:04] Suzuki
    If I step outside, our people are gonna kill me.
[17:07] Suzuki
    I'm curious how you're doing, actually.
[17:10] Suzuki
    The Rear Ender's weapon is in your leg.
[17:12] Suzuki
    Not bad, Saruta.
[17:15] Onikobe
    I need to support Ninja Chief Kato.
[17:23] Kato
    What's the holdup, Ninja Lab?!
[17:25] Kato
    Hurry! Fire Escape!
[17:27] Ranran
    I can't get the UN and Cube's coordinates.
[17:30] Ranran
    And it's a four-story building,
    so that just complicates things.
[17:34] Ranran
    Take him outside the building, please.
[17:35] Ranran
    Take him outside the building, please.
[17:38] Kato
    What?!
[17:40] Kato
    He's trying to break free from Cube!
[17:53] Suzuki
    Shit.
[17:57] Suzuki
    I'm gonna survive, no matter what!
[18:09] Kuro
    You gonna wear your glasses
    under the mask, Hibi?
[18:13] Hibi
    Oh, I forgot.
[18:17] Kuro
    Hibi. She's human just like us.
[18:19] Kuro
    Kill her and she's bound to die.
[18:22] Kuro
    Calm down.
[18:28] Hibi
    I'm shocked to find out
    I can still fear anything.
[18:43] Hibi
    All right, UN. Let's do this
    hand-to-hand, all right?
[18:47] Yamada
    Sure.
[20:22] Yamada
    It's cute how you run around like that.
[20:24] Yamada
    Don't worry.
[20:26] Yamada
    I won't do anything, so go ahead and stand.
[20:29] Yamada
    Let's start over.
[20:32] Kuro
    Stay cool, Hibi.
[20:34] Kuro
    Smile, smile!
[20:36] Hibi
    Wait, how could you tell?
    With the mask, I mean.
[20:38] Kuro
    Eh, I can tell.
[20:41] Kuro
    And she's apparently relaxed enough
    to start doing radio calisthenics.
[20:45] Kuro
    You can't beat her without fully committing.
[20:47] Kuro
    Treat this fight like an
    educational experience.
[20:51] Hibi
    Yeah. Got it.
[20:54] Hibi
    Hope you don't mind going
    chest-to-chest for this lesson.
[20:57] Yamada
    But a maiden's chest is a precious thing.
[21:00] Yamada
    Not loaned out conditionally,
    but given out of unconditional love.
[21:07] Eita
    She let me put my hands
    all over it, though...
[21:11] Kuro
    Eita? Oh, right, I forgot about him.
[21:15] Hibi
    Okay. Test of strength, then.
[21:17] Hibi
    My arms oughta be stronger!
[21:20] Yamada
    Okay.
[21:29] Hibi
    How stupid can you be to
    try to out-muscle me?!
[21:42] Hibi
    Shit!
[21:48] Hibi
    You fell for it!
[21:51] Hibi
    My name...
[21:53] Hibi
    is Miracle "Thunder" Hibi!
SIGN    Episode 11 "Kuro Finally Took Up a Sword"
[23:55] Kuro
    Seems like Nekohira is ranked 66,000th
[23:58] Kuro
    and Saruta is 2,500th in
    common Japanese family names.
[24:02] Saruta
    I never ran into you during the episode,
[24:04] Saruta
    but I can kill one of the
    Kumogakure clan right now and—
[24:06] Kuro
    Oh, time's almost up.
[24:07] Saruta
    What?!

E11 - Kuro Finally Took Up a Sword
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] (Flashback) Saruta
    Suzuki.
[00:03] (Flashback) Onikobe
    Behind you!
[00:06] (Flashback) Saruta
    You'll go last.
[00:08] (Flashback) Saruta
    Is that all you've got, Onikobe?!
[00:12] (Flashback) Onikobe
    Ninja Chief Kato.
[00:13] (Flashback) Kato
    What's the holdup, Ninja Lab?!
[00:15] (Flashback) Kato
    Hurry! Fire Escape!
[00:25] Hibi
    You fell for it!
[00:28] Hibi
    My name...
[00:29] Hibi
    is Miracle "Thunder" Hibi!
[00:39] Kuro
    A dual-edged blade that fully
    electrocutes him, as well...
[00:43] Kuro
    Launched through the
    electric parka made for Hibi,
[00:46] Kuro
    with his electrical resistance
    born from a lightning strike.
[00:50] Kuro
    The question is, how effective will it be on UN?
[01:07] Hibi
    Wh-Where is this strength coming from?!
[01:11] Hibi
    And the electricity's not working!
[01:18] Hibi
    Whoa—
[01:25] Hibi
    Life... flashing before my eyes...
    Master's... bald-ass head...
[01:35] Yamada
    Sorry, my bad! I'm not supposed to kill you.
[01:40] Yamada
    Next.
[01:42] Yamada
    That'd be you, Kuro-kun.
[01:45] Kuro
    Please-wait-one-moment.
SIGN    Episode 11 "Kuro Finally Took Up a Sword"
[03:23] Noguchi
    I think I just heard
    screaming in the distance...
[03:28] Sato
    Yeah.
[03:30] Noguchi
    Why'd you leave class, Sato-san?
[03:34] Sato
    I thought I might land a scoop
    for the school newspaper.
[03:39] Noguchi
    I see.
[03:41] Sato
    What about you, Noguchi-san?
[03:43] Noguchi
    Me? Well, the director told me to run in
    the direction that had the fewest people.
[03:50] Noguchi
    Also, to follow the orders from
    the blackboard eraser cleaner...
[03:54] Noguchi
    which brought me here.
[03:55] Sato
    From the... blackboard eraser cleaner?
[03:57] Noguchi
    I-It's the truth, though!
[03:59] Sato
    O-Okay.
[04:00] Noguchi
    Come on! Stop avoiding eye contact!
[04:03] Noguchi
    I think the director probably
    put some kind of radio in it...
[04:08] Noguchi
    Don't walk away!
[04:11] Sato
    I actually love that kinda
    thing, so... don't worry.
[04:16] Noguchi
    Things have just been weird since
    Kuro-kun came by my room that night.
[04:26] Suzuki
    Sorry to trouble you...
[04:30] Suzuki
    but I could use a lift.
[04:35] Suzuki
    Noguchi, do you not know
    how to support someone?
[04:39] Suzuki
    This is why you can't score.
[04:41] Noguchi
    What does me scoring have to do with it?!
[04:43] Noguchi
    Sato-san, you help, too!
[04:47] Suzuki
    Nah. Sato's gonna be recording
    everything that happens, so that's out.
[04:52] Suzuki
    Better to lean on the girl who was
    at the top of the class caste system,
[04:55] Suzuki
    despite not being that hot or charming,
    and then let it all slip through her fingers.
[05:00] Noguchi
    Excuse me?!
[05:01] Noguchi
    Look, I don't know who you are, but—
[05:03] Sato
    Noguchi-san...
[05:05] Sato
    That look is perfect.
[05:08] Noguchi
    No photos!
[05:17] Noguchi
    Okay, we made it to the gym.
[05:19] Suzuki
    So far so good, I guess.
[05:23] Suzuki
    Sato. Make sure to get a good shot
    of my beautiful face, wracked with pain.
[05:27] Sato
    Got it.
[05:28] Noguchi
    Are we not in a rush?
[05:31] Director
    Looks like you made it safely.
[05:34] Director
    There's a door inside the room
    across from the stage.
[05:38] Director
    Head there.
[05:39] Sato
    It really did talk! Although
    this one's a fire extinguisher.
[05:42] Suzuki
    He's got stuff set up all over school.
[05:45] Suzuki
    Creepy as it is, it came in handy this time.
[05:48] Director
    The fire extinguisher is actually
    wireless, so take it with you.
[05:53] Suzuki
    Noguchi, get the fire extinguisher.
[05:55] Noguchi
    Why me?!
[05:57] Sato
    Noguchi-san, that was a great expression.
[05:59] Noguchi
    No photos!
[06:10] Noguchi
    Hang on!
[06:12] Suzuki
    Look, if you hang tough,
    I can introduce you to a hot guy.
[06:15] Noguchi
    For real?!
[06:16] Director
    There'll be a small door beside the stairs.
[06:20] Director
    It's not locked, so head in there.
[06:23] Sato
    I found it.
[06:28] Sato
    There's a stairway that heads underground.
[06:31] Sato
    What should we do?
[06:34] Suzuki
    We'll just have to go.
[06:37] Director
    You three don't have much time.
[06:40] Director
    If you want to escape this
    school alive, hurry along.
[06:44] Sato
    Is this... beneath the gym?
[06:47] Sato
    And it goes on for a long way.
[06:50] Director
    This is directly beneath the gymnasium.
[06:53] Director
    But if Escape attacks,
    you'll still be caught in the blast.
[06:57] Director
    Keep moving.
[06:59] Noguchi
    Hey, what's this "Escape" thing?
[07:02] Suzuki
    Escape is a top-secret orbital
    weapons platform run by NIN.
[07:07] Suzuki
    Anyone who knows about it
[07:09] Suzuki
    tends to disappear, along with their entire
    family, so you're better off not knowing.
[07:14] Noguchi
    But you just said it! And I already heard!
[07:18] Suzuki
    All jokes aside, if we make it out of this alive,
[07:23] Suzuki
    I'll guarantee your survival.
[07:26] Noguchi
    Are you okay?
[07:28] Director
    Even getting to the closest exit will
    take you thirty minutes at this pace.
[07:34] Director
    Can you last that long?
[07:35] Suzuki
    Awfully considerate of you, for an enemy.
[07:39] Director
    An enemy, huh? Before the war,
    we were all the same organization.
[07:43] Suzuki
    You realize how long ago that was?
[07:45] Suzuki
    You probably weren't even born then.
[07:47] Director
    My father was one of the shinobi
    in favor of continuing the war.
[07:50] Director
    I've been influenced by him,
    for better or for worse.
[07:53] Suzuki
    It's because those warmongers went
    underground and kept up a pointless resistance
[07:57] Suzuki
    that the world of shinobi
    still doesn't know peace.
[08:03] Director
    You really think our absence would be
    all it takes for you to have peace?
SIGN    Nurse's Office
[08:11] Mako
    It's clear. Let's move on.
[08:15] Hachiya
    Right.
[08:18] Mako
    For now, let's find the director...
    rather, the clairaudience user.
[08:22] Hachiya
    Mako-chan, what's the connection between
    your organization and the clairaudience user?
[08:27] Mako
    Well, he's like a satellite unit...
    except he's an individual.
[08:33] Mako
    He's kept at a comfortable
    distance, basically.
[08:36] Sato
    Um, can I ask something?
[08:39] Suzuki
    Go ahead.
[08:41] Sato
    Does this mean that the world
    of ninja split in two after the war,
[08:44] Sato
    and now those two sides are enemies?
[08:48] Sato
    Sorry if I got it wrong.
[08:49] Suzuki
    That covers it.
[08:50] Director
    Sure does.
[08:52] Noguchi
    So casual! Why the sudden lack of gravitas?!
[08:55] Hachiya
    Why's he been here for decades?
[09:00] Mako
    I'd think NIN would know more about it.
[09:04] Mako
    This place used to be a facility
    for the Japanese army.
[09:07] Mako
    It was an underground laboratory for
    the organization that would become NIN,
[09:11] Mako
    as well as a communication hub for UN.
[09:16] Mako
    It's hallowed ground
    for all three organizations.
[09:20] Noguchi
    What even is this place?
[09:24] Suzuki
    A secret exit to the underground
    tunnels used by Under Ninja,
[09:27] Suzuki
    and the remains of a secret workshop.
[09:29] Director
    Impressive.
[09:32] Mako
    Any guard for that kind of place would
    need ties to all three organizations.
[09:37] Hachiya
    "So the clairaudience user
    has ties to UN, too?"
[09:42] Mako
    I'm just boots on the ground.
    I don't have all the details.
[09:48] Mako
    Sorry to change the subject, but...
[10:00] Mako
    I believe he's here.
[10:08] Mako
    Stay behind me.
[10:13] Mako
    I've never resented my lack
    of ability like I have today,
[10:17] Mako
    but I'll do whatever it takes
    to absorb his attack.
[10:20] Mako
    Use that chance to get away, Shion-kun!
[10:25] Saruta
    Hiding behind a girl's skirt?
    Damn, you're one privileged little bastard!
[10:30] Saruta
    Hachiya Shion, the grandson of Tara,
    one of the seven NIN leaders.
[10:36] Saruta
    My real target...
[10:39] Saruta
    is you!
[10:47] Hachiya
    I know.
[11:10] Saruta
    Hopping off my shoulder when I'm invisible...
[11:13] Saruta
    Seems like a risky move, grandkid!
[11:18] Hachiya
    You went a little kill-crazy.
    The smell of blood is all over you.
[11:22] Hachiya
    And in close-range combat, you don't need
    to see someone to tell where they are.
[11:27] Hachiya
    Didn't you undergo nighttime CQB training?
[11:31] Saruta
    I'm impressed, grandkid!
[11:33] Saruta
    But I guess nobody would follow a dumbass,
    even if he was next in line for the top.
[11:38] Mako
    I couldn't tell at this range at all...
[11:40] Mako
    And I hope my own body odor was okay.
[11:43] Hachiya
    I'm your real target, then?
    Who put you up to this?
[11:49] Saruta
    Gotta say, I'm amazed a lowly ex-genin like
    myself gets to talk to a big shot like you.
[11:54] Saruta
    Just goes to show you never know
    what turns life is gonna take!
[11:58] Hachiya
    That life has just about run out, in your case.
[12:15] Hachiya
    Escape has locked on to you.
[12:18] Saruta
    You're bluffing. They're not gonna
    fire when you're right here.
[12:22] Hachiya
    I would think you'd understand
    how ruthless NIN can be.
[12:34] Ranran
    Confirming automated camouflage
    shutdown from Escape.
[12:41] Ranran
    Laser emitter ready to fire.
[12:55] Ranran
    Target confirmed via
    Hachiya Shion's targeting marker.
[13:00] Ranran
    Margin of error is +/- 10 meters.
[13:03] Ozu
    Aw, come on!
[13:06] Ozu
    Don't you dare catch Hachiya-kun in this!
[13:08] Ozu
    Cancel the shot! Right now!
[13:09] Ranran
    I can't operate Escape from here.
[13:12] Ranran
    And fire control requires
    a jonin's authorization.
[13:17] Ozu
    I gotta figure this out!
    What are the bosses thinking?
[13:21] Ozu
    Are they cutting Hachiya Shion off?
[13:25] Ozu
    With the successful brain transplant of
    Tara, head of the seven NIN leaders,
[13:28] Ozu
    the succession system might be finished.
[13:31] Ozu
    Is this part of a clash between the old
    administration and the potential new one?
[13:45] Hachiya
    Mako! Shoot him!
[13:46] Mako
    Right!
[13:51] Saruta
    That weapon's a projectile?
[14:08] Ranran
    The targeting signal is gone.
[14:11] Ranran
    Escape's firing sequence
    is automatically shutting down.
[14:25] Hachiya
    He must've struck her as he ran...
[14:30] Hachiya
    Mako, I would've died if it wasn't for you.
[14:33] Hachiya
    You have my thanks as the future head of
    the seven NIN leaders, Hachiya Tara Shion.
[14:47] Hachiya
    I will never forget you.
    Please watch over me.
[14:52] Hachiya
    Until the day I am the leader of the seven.
[14:57] Noguchi
    Exit... Where's the exit?
[15:00] Suzuki
    Over there. Look at that tunnel.
[15:04] Suzuki
    They're filled with concrete now,
[15:07] Suzuki
    but they used to lead all over the place.
[15:10] Suzuki
    I heard there was one that
    went all the way to Nagano.
[15:17] Suzuki
    Let's take a break.
[15:19] Suzuki
    Anyway, this is our best hope for an exit,
[15:21] Suzuki
    because there are plenty of other
    holes like that leading out of here.
[15:27] Sato
    Um... I have another question.
[15:30] Sato
    What did the secret workshop make?
[15:33] Suzuki
    I could tell you,
[15:35] Suzuki
    but I think our fire extinguisher
    probably knows better.
[15:38] Director
    Take a look at the massive space you're in.
[15:42] Director
    What comes to mind?
[15:45] Noguchi
    It's so huge...
[15:47] Sato
    Yeah.
[15:48] Suzuki
    They manufactured counterfeit bills.
[15:50] Noguchi
    You answered anyway?!
[15:52] Suzuki
    In the 1980s, when people above ground
    were enjoying the so-called bubble economy,
[15:57] Suzuki
    these guys were down here,
    steadily churning out counterfeit yen.
[16:02] Suzuki
    There's even a theory saying that's
    how the bubble actually burst.
[16:07] Suzuki
    Theories on how it turned out vary. Maybe the
    copies were so good, no one ever noticed...
[16:11] Suzuki
    Maybe someone noticed, but let it continue.
[16:13] Sato
    That's a lot of theories.
[16:15] Suzuki
    Anyway, since the bubble burst,
    Japan's economy has been trending downward.
[16:20] Suzuki
    And at the same time,
    UN has secured access to massive funding.
[16:23] Director
    Although we paid no small cost in personnel.
[16:29] Director
    The battle when NIN finally discovered
    these tunnels... was gruesome.
[16:36] Director
    That was before they had Escape, after all.
[16:40] Director
    A lot of the tunnels were bombed,
    burying people alive inside them.
[16:46] Director
    The women and children who
    were working in the workshop
[16:49] Director
    were slaughtered without mercy, too.
[16:53] Suzuki
    You make it sound like you were there.
[16:55] Director
    That's because I was. I saw it myself.
[17:01] Suzuki
    I see.
[17:02] Suzuki
    I think I understand why you're here now.
[17:07] Director
    As the sole survivor, the government,
    NIN, and UN decided
[17:13] Director
    that my tangential relationship to all three
[17:15] Director
    earned me a role as the
    gravekeeper for this place.
[17:19] Suzuki
    Tell me, girls,
[17:21] Suzuki
    doesn't this place seem a little big
    for just printing counterfeit bills?
[17:26] Noguchi
    More questions?
[17:27] Sato
    I mean... it's not like
    I've ever made any myself.
[17:30] Suzuki
    When it comes to making counterfeit yen,
[17:32] Suzuki
    the printing and ink can be handled
    with standard equipment.
[17:37] Suzuki
    The kind that's easy to acquire.
    The real trick comes down to the paper.
[17:42] Suzuki
    The ingredients for and manufacture
    of the paper is difficult.
[17:46] Suzuki
    What NIN was shocked to find
    when they discovered this place
[17:50] Suzuki
    was a massive paper-producing operation,
    bigger than what even we could manage.
[18:13] Kato
    He's injured.
SIGN    Unknown Data
[18:30] Kato
    Onikobe, do you read me?
[18:33] Kato
    Head to the roof. We're ending him.
[18:38] Onikobe
    Yes, sir.
[18:48] Kuro
    I-made-a-mistake.
[18:53] Kuro
    The-ring-was-on-my-left-hand.
[18:57] Kuro
    I-am-right-handed.
[19:03] Hibi
    Why is he talking like a robot? To buy time?
[19:06] Kuro
    Swapping-ring-to-right-hand.
[19:10] Kuro
    Extending-antenna.
[19:13] Kuro
    Raising-hand-for-better-reception.
[19:23] Yamada
    Nice breeze, huh?
[19:34] Hibi
    Still?! Come on!
[19:35] Yamada
    Let's be patient.
[19:59] Hibi
    Kuro finally took up a sword...
SIGN    Sawada Glass Repair Company
[20:04] Manager
    The Ninja Labs' latest weapon,
    the katana drone.
[20:09] Manager
    Or maybe drone katana?
    Well, it seems to have worked.
[20:14] Manager
    Avenge Hachiro-kun, Kuro-kun.
[20:21] Kuro
    I guess the poison darts didn't work, either.
[20:24] Kuro
    The waiting didn't seem to matter.
[20:35] Kuro
    So it's not just electricity.
    She's resistant to poison, too.
[20:40] Kuro
    Wait, look at those muscles.
    Maybe the dart didn't even penetrate?
[20:45] Kuro
    This sucks.
[20:46] Kuro
    I was hoping to chip away at her stamina,
    but that's not gonna fly with this monster.
[20:52] Yamada
    Wow, amazing! You use swords, Kuro-kun?
[20:55] Yamada
    Hang on a sec.
[20:57] Kuro
    Hell no, I'm not waiting. What're you, stupid?
[21:00] Hibi
    He baits every bit of intel
    he can get from the enemy,
[21:03] Hibi
    never spilling anything himself,
    while talking trash.
[21:06] Hibi
    That's Kuro for you!
[21:09] Yamada
    Oh, there it is!
[21:34] Yamada
    With swords, this'll be over really fast, huh?
[21:38] Kuro
    Om anichi...
[21:40] Kuro
    Marishiei... sowaka.
[21:46] Yamada
    Wow, your upper body went invisible!
[21:52] Teo
    For a cat, you're a hell of a rider!
SIGN    I used to do this all the time when I was human.
[21:58] Teo
    I have no idea what you're saying, but...
[22:01] Teo
    Anyone who can handle me knows their stuff!
SIGN    Episode 12 "Business as Usual, Wrapped Up Tidy"
[23:55] Kuro
    Yamada is ranked 12th among the
    most common Japanese family names.
[23:58] Yamada
    You really wanna talk about that
    when we're about to kill each other?
[24:01] Kuro
    I mean, these segments are kinda parallel
    to the main story. Not a lot of connection.
[24:05] Yamada
    Then instead of waiting for the next episode,
[24:06] Yamada
    let's fight to the death now, Kuro-kun!
[24:08] Kuro
    Wow. So consistent.

E12 - Business as Usual, Wrapped Up Tidy
Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:17] Kuro
    This woman...
[00:20] Kuro
    No. This monster won't allow
    the luxury of a second strike.
[00:24] Kuro
    And the only way to end it
    in one is to take her head off.
[00:28] Kuro
    Granted, that's probably
    her read on things, too.
[00:31] Kuro
    The Marishiten's internal
    airbag will protect me.
[00:35] Kuro
    The camouflage will lower her
    chances of landing a fatal blow.
[00:45] Kuro
    I should be able to survive!
SIGN    Episode 12 "Business as Usual, Wrapped Up Tidy"
[02:29] Teo
    They've got the front gate
    blocked off with vehicles.
[02:33] Teo
    Got it! Let's rush 'em!
[02:39] Teo
    Go!
[02:41] Nekohira
    I'm coming, Saruta!
SIGN    Onikobe
SIGN    Error: Error Code 22222
[04:05] Kato
    Onikobe!
[04:08] Kato
    It's a trap!
[04:13] Saruta
    Onikobe!
[04:16] Saruta
    You're coming along for the ride...
[04:19] Saruta
    when I die!
SIGN    Please don't be too late!
SIGN    Huh?!
[04:31] Teo
    Shit!
SIGN    A door...
SIGN    Ah...
SIGN    Memories fading again......
SIGN    Saruta...
SIGN    I'm sorry...
[05:00] Kato
    She lowered the visor to
     brace against a direct attack.
[05:03] Kato
    Nicely done, Onikobe.
[05:06] Onikobe
    Ninja Chief Kato...
[05:09] Saruta
    Nice try!
[05:22] Kato
    Onikobe!
[05:30] Taira
    What's up?
[05:32] Ranran
    Take a look here, Manager Taira.
[05:34] Taira
    What is it?
[05:38] Ranran
    Wanna head to the nap room?
[05:40] Taira
    Make your report already.
[05:43] Ranran
    This is an extrapolation based on footage
    from our surveillance satellites.
[05:50] Ranran
    This is where the UN kills Onikobe...
[05:53] Ranran
    But his suit is empty,
    and she receives a counterattack.
[05:56] Taira
    Hang on.
[05:58] Taira
    If you were watching the whole time,
    you would've seen the UN take the suit off.
[06:05] Taira
    Why not notify Onikobe?
[06:07] Ranran
    But my mission is to analyze the UN suit.
[06:13] Taira
    Fair enough. Continue.
[06:15] Ranran
    Right.
[06:16] Ranran
    So, I had previously assumed the suit
    was a weaponized NBC protective suit,
[06:23] Ranran
    but between the anti-UV
    membrane in the goggles
[06:26] Ranran
    and the attachment for an optional
    storage unit on the back,
[06:30] Ranran
    I now think that the UN suit...
[06:32] Ranran
    is actually a modified spacewalk suit.
[06:37] Taira
    A-And... if that's true...
[06:41] Taira
    What would they be able to do with it?
[06:44] Ranran
    Did you see this news report?
[06:48] Taira
    They didn't load the satellite...
[06:51] Taira
    But the rocket was still launched?
[06:54] Ranran
    The suit would've been less
    than 100 kilograms as cargo.
[06:57] Ranran
    Throw in a life support system, and you'd have
    a complete extravehicular mobility unit.
[07:05] Taira
    Then the UN is actually after Escape?
[07:09] Taira
    That can't be!
[07:11] Ranran
    There's more to it than that.
[07:13] Ranran
    I believe UN's true goal is the data server
[07:18] Ranran
    that contains the personal information
    of all 20,000 of NIN's shinobi.
[07:22] Ranran
    The reason it's said to be 100% secure
[07:27] Ranran
    is because it's stored inside Escape,
    which is both in space and invisible.
[07:41] Kato
    Ninja Lab! I've locked down the UN!
[07:44] Kato
    Bomb him already!
[07:47] Ranran
    You need to recommend that the 500
    Ninja Committee destroy Escape, now!
[07:51] Ranran
    If I were UN, I'd seize control of Escape
    while I was stealing the data.
[08:04] Robot
    I have a report. I have a report.
[08:08] Robot
    The Ninja Lab has determined that
    the UN suit is actually a space suit.
[08:14] Robot
    UN's target is Escape.
[08:17] Robot
    It's recommended that any orders
     to fire are canceled at once.
[08:22] Robot
    There is a high likelihood that the enemy
    is already within Escape's airspace.
[08:26] Robot
    If the worst-case scenario proves true,
[08:30] Robot
    it will mean both Escape's
    store of NIN agent data
[08:33] Robot
    and control of the satellite are lost.
[08:36] Robot
    It would be wise to consider
    Escape's self-destruct mechanism.
[08:39] Nin Leader 1
    Ridiculous!
[08:40] Nin Leader 1
    Do they realize how much
    that thing cost?! A trillion yen!
[08:44] Nin Leader 2
    What happened to destroying the subterranean
    space below Kodan High School?
[08:47] Nin Leader 3
    This plan took four years to put together!
[08:51] Nin Leader 4
    Have we even confirmed
    a UN is near the satellite?
[08:54] Robot
    Not currently.
[08:57] Nin Leader 4
    You realize false reports to the 500 Ninja
    Committee are punishable by death?
[09:01] Nin Leader 4
    Have you considered that?
[09:03] Robot
    If a decision is reached now,
    before confirmation is made,
[09:07] Robot
    it will be possible to protect the personal
    data of all 20,000 NIN operatives.
[09:12] Robot
    Please, make the call.
[09:16] Robot
    An alert is coming in from Escape.
[09:17] Robot
    The lock on the emergency
    access point has been disabled.
[09:22] Nin Leader 2
    It can't be...
[09:26] Nin Leader 4
    Fire the laser cannon at
    maximum output immediately.
[09:30] Nin Leader 4
    And ensure the cooling
    mechanism is disabled.
[09:33] Nin Leader 4
    We will cook the intruder
    inside Escape alive.
[09:37] Nin Leader 4
    If that is not possible, then detonate it.
[09:49] PA
    Temperature rising. Temperature rising.
[09:52] PA
    Temperature rising. Temperature rising.
[09:54] Kiryu
    Looks like they caught on.
[09:56] Kiryu
    Better hurry, then.
[09:59] Kiryu
    Gotta rush!
[10:02] Kiryu
    Because NIN is pissed!
[10:48] Kuro
    E-Even I...
[10:54] Kuro
    couldn't pull it off?
[11:06] Hibi
    No fucking way.
SIGN    One minute before the murder of Kumogakure Kuro
[11:25] (Flashback) Saruta
    I-I think... you're... Instructor Kato...
    the teacher, right?
[11:33] (Flashback) Saruta
    I doubt you... remember me, but...
[11:38] (Flashback) Saruta
    I saw something...
[11:40] (Flashback) Saruta
    When I became a nukenin...
    and made contact with UN...
[11:47] (Flashback) Saruta
    Gonna keep killing until the day I die!
[11:54] (Flashback) Saruta
    I saw... something...
[11:57] (Flashback) Saruta
    Behind the graves... It was him...
[12:00] (Flashback) Saruta
    The disguise... of Commander Sasama!
[12:23] (Flashback) Ozu
    Hachiya-kun... Kato...
[12:26] (Flashback) Ozu
    Here it comes.
[12:29] (Flashback) Saruta
    From now on... there will be even...
[12:33] (Flashback) Saruta
    more chaos—
[12:49] (Flashback) Male Student 1
    Will you go out with me?
[12:51] (Flashback) Girl Student 2
    I'm sorry.
[12:57] (Flashback) Ozu
    Ahoy-hoy. We've got work to do.
[13:01] (Flashback) Ozu
    Huh? It's just a way of saying hello.
[13:04] (Flashback) Ozu
    Contact the governor and have him
    set up a disaster response task force.
[13:08] (Flashback) Head Teacher
    Wh-What the...
[13:09] (Flashback) Fattytake
    S-Sensei!
[13:10] (Flashback) Head Teacher
    Fattytake—
[13:13] (Flashback) Ozu
    You'll wanna use script A-22 for the media,
    cops, and fire department.
[13:20] (Flashback) Ozu
    Stick to the plan.
    Say the explosion was caused
[13:23] (Flashback) Ozu
    by a massive buildup of
    methane gas in the sewers.
[13:33] (Flashback) Ozu
    The physical cordon of the
    area around Kodan High School
[13:36] (Flashback) Ozu
    and info control take top priority.
[13:39] (Flashback) Ozu
    Business as usual, wrapped up tidy.
[13:41] (Flashback) Ozu
    Huh? You know, "wrap it up," like finish it.
[13:44] (Flashback) Ozu
    Man, you don't have a clue, do you?
[14:12] Suzuki
    Sato, come on!
[14:14] Sato
    Right!
[14:15] Suzuki
    This is an important part.
    Make sure to get it.
[14:17] Sato
    Right.
[14:19] Noguchi
    Could you please hurry up? This is hard!
[14:24] Eita
    That explosion...
[14:26] Eita
    Is that what Kuro-san was talking about?
[14:33] Eita
    Yamada-san! Your nose!
    What happened to your nose?!
[14:35] Eita
    I-It's gone!
[14:37] Eita
    Y-You okay?
[14:41] Eita
    D-Do you have... a head in your hands?
[14:45] Eita
    A human head?!
[15:13] Eita
    Did I just kick...
[15:21] Ranran
    Manager Taira.
[15:22] Ranran
    You're sweating bullets. You gonna be okay?
[15:27] Ranran
    So, what happened with Escape?
[15:29] Taira
    Escape's orbit is decaying.
    It's on course for atmospheric re-entry.
[15:36] Ranran
    So it's totaled...
[15:38] Ranran
    And UN has acquired NIN's personal data
    from the server, haven't they?
[15:45] Taira
    No...
[15:46] Taira
    There was no confirmation of any
    large-bandwidth transmissions from Escape.
[15:53] Taira
    But there's a good chance a landing unit
[15:55] Taira
    containing some kind of storage
    medium may have gotten away.
[16:00] Taira
    The seven NIN leaders have assembled
[16:03] Taira
    at the Grand Ninja Command
    to assume operational control.
[16:07] Taira
    That means NIN has officially
    transitioned to a war footing.
[16:12] 7 Nin 1
    Why did they drag us out here?
[16:15] 7 Nin 2
    They wanna wreck little Escape.
[16:17] 7 Nin 3
    Do just the five of us get to make the call?
[16:21] 7 Nin 2
    We sure can. It's a majority
    vote among the seven of us.
[16:25] 7 Nin 5
    Five of us is a majority, all right.
[16:29] 7 Ninja 3
    Uh, which button was it again?
[16:34] 7 Nin 4
    The red one! Have you really forgotten that?
[16:39] 7 Nin 2
    Do you think Tara-chan's gotten any bigger?
[16:43] 7 Nin 3
    He's still a baby.
    Can't even talk yet, I hear.
[16:48] 7 Nin 4
    I can't wait to be young again, too.
[16:51] 7 Nin 2
    Hopefully before we die.
[17:07] Taira
    The loss of Escape means losing
    our decisive advantage over UN...
[17:17] Taira
    With the potential loss of the personal data,
[17:20] Taira
    anyone above chunin will be
     brought in for the response,
[17:22] Taira
    forcing all of them to abandon
    their current missions.
[17:28] Taira
    These are battlefield conditions.
[17:30] Taira
    I'm giving you a field promotion
    from genin to chunin.
[17:34] Taira
    Hibi... Hibi Ranran...
[17:37] Taira
    Your brother, Hibi Miracle, is alive.
[17:42] Hibi
    No one should see him like this...
[17:46] Hibi
    Wait, his head's gone.
[17:58] Hibi
    He's holding something?
[18:04] Hibi
    Kuro... You did it, man!
[18:12] Taira
    He was able to retrieve a physiological
    sample from a UN agent, as well.
[18:16] Taira
    It'll be in the Ninja Lab's
    hands soon enough.
[18:18] Taira
    I want a detailed analysis and report.
[18:22] Taira
    By the way, Onikobe died.
[18:25] Taira
    Kato, her direct supervisor,
    is being put before a Ninja Tribunal.
[18:31] Taira
    He's done for.
[18:58] Kawado
    Hey, kiddo.
[19:01] Kawado
    What is this?
[19:02] Eita
    U-Uh... It's about Kuro-san...
[19:06] Kawado
    I know. The cops came by earlier.
[19:10] Kawado
    Kuro-kun's room is open. Go on in.
[19:13] Kawado
    I'll be there soon.
[19:18] Ono
    Kuro-kun!
[19:22] Ono
    Just the underwear thief...
[19:24] Eita
    I am not a...
[19:27] Eita
    Y'know, forget it.
[19:29] Ono
    That was one hell of an explosion!
[19:33] Ono
    I was in a vehicle and I still heard it.
[19:37] Kawado
    But you guys were at a different
    school, right? What's up with that?
[19:44] Eita
    I don't know if you'll believe me, but...
[19:50] Eita
    So that's when I got spooked and
    kicked the thing she threw down.
[19:57] Eita
    And it was... Kuro-san's head, I think.
[20:04] Kawado
    His head!
[20:04] Eita
    I-Is that funny?
[20:06] Ono
    Wait. What about his funeral?
[20:11] Ono
    I mean, I got my mourning clothes out, so...
[20:16] Kawado
    From what the cops told me,
[20:18] Kawado
    the funeral's going to be for relatives only.
[20:23] Ono
    I see...
[20:25] Kawado
    Feels so weird.
[20:27] Kawado
    I saw him this morning,
    but by the afternoon, he's gone.
[20:33] (Flashback) Kuro
    You're as heavy... as I figured.
[20:37] Ono
    Yeah. I talked to him this morning myself.
[20:41] (Flashback) Kuro
    I hear you.
[20:42] (Flashback) Kuro
    Ever since I tried the stuff Ono-san's mom
    sends him, I don't like it anymore, either.
[20:49] (Flashback) Eita
    Kuro-san... You're serious
    about protecting me, right?
[20:54] (Flashback) Kuro
    Yeah. Five hundred yen a pop.
[20:57] Kawado
    Not a lot of good memories, actually.
[21:01] Eita
    You, too?
[21:03] Kawado
    Whatever, let's drink!
    I'm gonna have some eggplant.
[21:11] Kawado
    What's up?
[21:14] Eita
    U-Um, well...
[21:16] Eita
    Are boobs, like... hard?
[21:20] Kawado
    Look, this is embarrassing,
    so turn the lights out.
[21:25] Kawado
    Okay, close your eyes...
[21:28] Eita
    Right.
[21:29] Kawado
    Gently, now.
[21:32] Kawado
    Gently, like you're wrapping
    your hands around them.
[21:36] Eita
    R-Right.
[21:37] Kawado
    What do you think, kiddo?
[21:39] Eita
    Well...
[21:41] Eita
    It's sorta like...  I thought
    they'd be softer, but...
[21:45] Eita
    There's a reality to it,
    and they feel really good.
[21:50] Kawado
    You heard him!
[21:51] Kawado
    Good for you, Ono-san! He likes your tits.
[21:57] Ono
    Dunno how to feel about that.
[21:59] Juniro
    Excuse me.
[22:04] Juniro
    You're being kinda noisy.
    Would you mind keeping it down?
[22:09] Eita
    K-Kuro?
[22:10] Kawado
    Uh, who are you?
[22:12] Juniro
    Me?
[22:14] Juniro
    I'm Kumogakure Juniro.
[22:17] Kawado
    So... your brother...
[22:20] Kawado
    Shame what happened to him.
[22:22] Kawado
    Come on in.
[22:24] Juniro
    That's all right.
[22:26] Juniro
    I have to clean up from moving in.
[22:30] Juniro
    And to be honest, it's not
    like I lived with my brother.
[22:35] Juniro
    So I feel kind of... disconnected from it.
[22:39] News Announcer
    There are still concerns for the
    unaccounted for in the aftermath.
SIGN    BREAKING        Kodan High School Gas Explosion
[22:45] News Announcer
    Additionally, the body of
    a Kodan High School student,
SIGN    Confirmed death   Kumogakure Kuro (24)
[22:50] News Announcer
    Kumogakure Kuro, age 24, was found on
    the roof of a school in the same district.
[22:54] News Announcer
    Any connection to the explosion
    is currently under investigation.
[22:59] Noguchi
    That was a hell of a day.
[23:02] Noguchi
    For today... I just wanna sleep.
[23:19] Noguchi
    K-Kumogakure-kun?!
[23:22] Toichi
    Heya. I'm Kumogakure Toichi.
[23:31] Juro
    Doesn't matter how many times
    you look. Kuro's still dead.
[23:37] Juniro
    That fact doesn't change,
[23:39] Juniro
    but we can change the future
    by learning from what's happened,
[23:44] Juniro
    Juro-niisan.
[23:50] Juniro
    Or rather... Ten-san.