E1 - The Troubleshooters' Office Source: Crunchyroll Translator: Editor: Timer: QC: (Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.) [00:21] Kazuya     Who is she? [00:26] Kazuya     My sister? [00:28] Kazuya     And... [00:31] Kazuya     Mom? [00:36] Kazuya     Kiriha-san?! [00:47] Kazuya     Why? [00:52] Kazuya     Why... [00:59] Kazuya     ...did we end up like this? SIGN    Tsugumomo: SIGN    A tsukumogami spirit that has transformed after many years, SIGN    obtaining a body and soul indistinguishable from a human's. SIGN    Tsugumomo SIGN    Tsugu SIGN    m 0 0 l 0 -10 l 10 -10 l 10 0 SIGN    m 0 0 l 0 -10 l 10 -10 l 10 0 SIGN    Chapter 1 SIGN    The Troubleshooters' Office SIGN    "The Troubleshooters' Office"! [02:47] Kazuya     Okay, enough! It's too hot as it is! [02:51] Kazuya     How am I supposed to sleep like this?! [02:54] Kazuya     Kiriha-san! How many times do I have     to ask you to wear panties in bed?! SIGN    Tsukumogami born from an obi sash      Kiriha [02:57] Kiriha     Wasn't on purpose. They always seem     to find their own way off of me. SIGN    Local Goddess      Kukuri SIGN    Local Goddess's Priestess      Kokuyou [03:01] Kukuri     Why were we sleepin' in here, again? [03:03] Kokuyou     I accompanied you to the washroom     in the night, then followed you here. [03:06] Kukuri     You sure that wasn't     the night before last? [03:08] Kiriha     None of this matters!     Back to bed, Kazuya... [03:10] Kazuya     Hey, Kiriha-san! [03:15] Kasumi     How many times do I have to tell     you to stop tempting Ya-kun?! [03:17] Kasumi     You tsukumogami tart! [03:19] Kazuya     Stop! SIGN    Older sister     Kagami Kasumi [03:23] Kasumi     Come on, Ya-kun. If you don't get ready     and eat soon, you're going to be late. [03:28] Kazuya     You're right! [03:32] Kazuya     Come on, Kiriha-san, aren't you coming? [03:36] Kazuya     We need to explain everything     to the others today. [03:42] Osamu     You seem exhausted as usual, Kagami-kun. SIGN     Osanai Osamu SIGN    Shiramine Shirou [03:45] Chisato     It's because he never allows enough time. SIGN     Chikaishi Chisato [03:48] Kazuya     I wish I had more to allow, believe me... [03:50] Guys     Hey, Obina-san. [03:52] Guys     Where'd you go to school before this? [03:54] Guys     Is that your natural hair color? [03:55] Guys     Got any hobbies? [03:56] Guys     What music do you like? [03:57] Kiriha     What is all this? [03:58] Kiriha     How am I meant to answer     so many questions at once? [04:00] Kazuya     Kiriha-san sure is a hit... [04:03] Guys     Hey, Kagami. [04:03] Guys     You're good friends with Obina-san, right? [04:06] Guys     Did you grow up together or something? [04:07] Kazuya     Uh, sorta. [04:09] Shirou     Then she must've lived in     your neighborhood, huh? [04:13] Kiriha     Neighborhood? We live in     the same house, in fact. [04:17] Shirou     Well, if you were friends back then, [04:19] Shirou     did you bathe together and     sleep together and all that? [04:23] Kiriha     Don't be foolish. [04:24] Kiriha     We still sleep together,     to say nothing of bathing. [04:28] Kiriha     It's Kazuya's duty to     wash my back, after all. [04:31] Shirou     Judgment time! SIGN    Classroom 2-2 Provisional Courtroom SIGN    Defendant Kagami Kazuya [04:38] Shirou     This perversion trial, held by     our class of wholesome young men, [04:41] Shirou     has now convened! SIGN    Judge S.S SIGN    Homeroom Teacher Iraha Isuzu [04:44] Teacher     Okay, everyone to your seats. [04:46] Teacher     What the— [04:47] Kazuya     Sensei! [04:48] Shirou     Defendant Kagami Kazuya! SIGN    Judge S.S [04:50] Shirou     You are charged with cohabiting [04:52] Shirou     with a beautiful girl and engaging     in lascivious activities! [04:55] Kazuya     It's a misunderstanding!     Kiriha-san's just confused, that's all! [04:58] Kazuya     Her memory's, like... y'know! SIGN    Key Witness Obina Kiriha [04:59] Kiriha     Rude. [05:00] Kazuya     Kiriha-san! [05:01] Kazuya     No more jokes! Please?! [05:03] Chisato     Your honor! SIGN    Juror C.C [05:04] Chisato     I've seen the defendant in the bath and     sleeping with Kiriha-san with my own eyes. [05:09] Kazuya     Chisato?! [05:10] Shirou     I see no grounds for     defense in this case! [05:10] Kazuya     Sensei! Sensei, I don't     think this is a legal trial! [05:12] Shirou     In the name of this assembly     of wholesome young men... [05:14] Teacher     I don't know what you expect me to do! [05:16] Shirou     you are hereby sentenced     to the maximum punishment! SIGN    Guilty of perversion in the first degree     Execution by turtle-shell bondage pendulum SIGN    Culture Club Room Annex SIGN    Culture Club Room Annex [05:30] Shirou     A tsukumogami, huh? [05:32] Kiriha     Indeed I am. [05:33] Kiriha     An obi tsukumogami, in fact. [05:36] Kiriha     I've been attending to exorcisms     in this area with Kazuya here. [05:40] Osamu     I see. [05:42] Osamu     Then the younger form you had     before was only temporary? SIGN    It's me! [05:45] Osamu     That is a shame. [05:47] Kiriha     It is? [05:47] Osamu     I meant to say, a surprise. [05:50] Osamu     Incidentally, Kagami-kun... [05:53] Osamu     This is a vacant room meant     for one of the culture clubs. [05:55] Shirou     Oh, yeah. What did you wanna talk about? [05:58] Shirou     And for the record, there is no     possible defense for the fact [06:01] Shirou     that you're cohabiting with a babe! [06:02] Kazuya     What are you even... [06:06] Kazuya     To be honest, I need to     ask you all for help. [06:10] Kazuya     You've seen it yourselves already, [06:13] Kazuya     but strange things keep     happening at this school. [06:19] Chisato     You mean the incidents caused by amasogi? [06:21] Shirou     Oh, that thing where people's desires     turn stuff supernatural, right? [06:26] Shirou     Man, that was pure hell. SIGN     Shirou's atonement was      smelling foul (for one week) [06:29] Kazuya     The longer an amasogi causes trouble, [06:31] Kazuya     the more intense the atonement it results in. [06:34] Kazuya     So I want to try to gather information     that'll help us deal with them faster. SIGN    New Extracurricular Group Submission SIGN    Group name: The Troubleshooters' Office SIGN    Requested by: Class 2-2 Kagami Kazuya SIGN    Group Goal: SIGN    Member list: [06:39] Kazuya     Which is why I'm thinking     of turning this room... [06:43] Kazuya     into a place where students can     come for help with their problems. [06:45] Shirou     Like, counseling? [06:47] Shirou     What the heck? [06:48] Osamu     I understand. [06:50] Osamu     By getting information on rumors     and troubles arising among students... [06:53] Chisato     We might be able to     uncover clues on amasogi! [06:56] Kazuya     Right! [06:57] Kazuya     But we wouldn't be able to do it alone. [07:00] Osamu     I assume that's where we come in. [07:03] Shirou     I gotta ask, why does all this stuff     keep happening at our school, anyway? [07:09] Osamu     A good question. I wonder if     there's a particular cause. [07:15] Kazuya     There's... [07:18] Kiriha     The birth of an amasogi is tied     to something called malison. [07:23] Shirou     Malaysian? [07:24] Kiriha     No. [07:25] Kiriha     Malison... is like a type of fog that has     the power to make wishes come true. [07:31] Kiriha     It occurs naturally throughout the world, SIGN    Malison [07:34] Kiriha     having a subtle influence     over all things that happen. [07:38] Kiriha     We tsukumogami are generally the     result of the accumulation of malison [07:44] Kiriha     over an extended period of time. [07:46] Kiriha     However, should an abnormally rich     amount of malison come under [07:50] Kiriha     the influence of an intense desire or wish, [07:53] Kiriha     it can create an instant tsukumogami, [07:55] Kiriha     one born without any     rational intelligence. [07:57] Kiriha     That's what amasogi are. [08:00] Osamu     Then this malison gathers     more easily in our school? [08:03] Shirou     Yeah, but I'm asking why! [08:06] Kiriha     Because someone who attends     school here has a condition [08:09] Kiriha     that causes them to attract malison. [08:14] Kiriha     They're born into every age, [08:18] Kiriha     dubbed "scorned children,"     and treated as the source of the scourge. [08:22] Kazuya     And it turns out... [08:25] Kazuya     that I'm one of those scorned children. [08:27] Shirou     So this stuff is happening     because of you, Kazuya? [08:32] Kazuya     Yeah. And honestly, I should probably     be dealing with this stuff by myself— [08:37] Kiriha     You're wrong there. [08:40] Kiriha     It's true that denser malison increases     the likelihood of amasogi being born, [08:46] Kiriha     but shunning the scorned children [08:49] Kiriha     merely results in the malison     collecting elsewhere. [08:52] Kiriha     All that changes is the time and place     in which the amasogi are born. [08:56] Kiriha     The real reason that amasogi are born [08:58] Kiriha     is a heart so weak that     it is overtaken by avarice. [09:03] Kiriha     No one has the right to pass that     blame on to the scorned child. [09:07] Kiriha     They are not at fault. [09:15] Shirou     Yeah, you've got a point. [09:18] Shirou     I'm the one who actually used     that amasogi cologne, after all. [09:23] Osamu     Right, it wasn't Kagami-kun's fault. [09:27] Osamu     The best thing for us to do is     prevent more damage where possible. [09:31] Shirou     And that's what this     troubleshooting office is for? [09:34] Shirou     All right, I'm in! [09:37] Osamu     I'll be splitting my time with the     manga club, but I'll join you. [09:41] Chisato     I'd love to help, too. SIGN    New Extracurricular Group Submission          Group name: The Troubleshooters' Office          Requested by: Class 2-2 Kagami Kazuya          Group Goal:          Member list:     Class 2-2 Shiramine Shirou     Class 2-2 Osanai Osamu     Class 2-2 Chikaishi Chisato     Class 2-2 Obina Kiriha [09:49] Kiriha     You may enter! SIGN    Hello [09:52] Tadataka     Hello! Did everything go well, then? SIGN    Student Council President      Tadata Tadataka SIGN    Newspaper Club      Nanakai Nanako [09:56] Kazuya     What are you two doing here? [09:57] Kiriha     I gave them word ahead of time. [10:00] Kiriha     It's thanks to Tadataka that we     have use of this room, you know. [10:04] Tadataka     Oh, it was the least I could do! [10:06] Nanako sign     I'll help, too. [10:07] Kazuya     But you both had to go through     atonement because of me... [10:11] Kiriha     Stop that. [10:13] Kiriha     I just said it wasn't your fault. [10:16] Kiriha     And besides... [10:17] Kiriha     Nanako! [10:23] Nanako     I'm grateful... to you... Kagami-senpai. [10:27] Kazuya     Her voice! [10:28] Kiriha     Atonement is basically one's punishment     for giving in to an amasogi's temptation. [10:32] Nanako sign     It's coming back     little by little. [10:33] Kiriha     If you accept that and are penitent,     the effects will weaken in time. [10:38] Tadataka     I'm starting to see some hope, as well. [10:41] Kiriha     Listen well. Blaming yourself     is not only pointless, [10:44] Kiriha     but will also have the opposite effect. [10:47] Kiriha     Understood? [10:50] Kazuya     Yeah. [10:52] Kazuya     Thank you, everyone! [10:54] Kiriha     Very good! It's time for the     Troubleshooters' Office to get to work. [11:01] Sign     Troubleshooters' Office!     First Club Meeting [11:02] Kazuya     And so... [11:04] Kiriha     Let's waste no time.     Has anyone heard anything? [11:08] Shirou     Yeah, question! [11:09] Shirou     Why can't I get a girlfriend?! [11:10] Kiriha     Your personality. [11:14] Chisato     Come to think of it... [11:17] Kiriha     What is it? [11:18] Chisato     Well, there's something     that came to mind. [11:26] Tadataka     The student council's been privy     to some information, as well. [11:30] Kazuya     What kind of information? [11:33] Tadataka     It seems that lately, underwear seems     to go missing after swimming classes. [11:38] Tadataka     We've had the odd report of     such incidents here and there. [11:43] Kazuya     An... underwear thief? SIGN    Tsugu SIGN    Tsugumomo [11:47] Kiriha     Tsugu Tsugumomo! SIGN    Tsugu SIGN    Tsugumomo SIGN    Tsugumomo ♥ [11:52] Chisato     Tsugu Tsugumomo! [11:59] Kazuya     Thanks for agreeing to help, Chisato. [12:02] Kazuya     I really do need you. [12:04] Chisato     Kazuya-kun... [12:16] Mimane     Here we go... [12:18] Mimane     Hey! Still asleep? [12:23] Mimane     Okay, fast asleep. [12:25] Mimane     All right! [12:29] Azami     Don't make so much noise. [12:30] Mimane     Aye-aye, sir! [12:35] Mimane     Okay, it's gone! [12:37] Mimane     Looks like smooth sailing. [12:49] Shirou     C... No, B. [12:51] Osamu     One vote for B. [12:53] Kazuya     Shirou, just for the record... [12:55] Shirou     Come on, man, I'm not gonna     steal anybody's underwear. [12:58] Shirou     It's what's on the inside that counts. [13:00] Osamu     And if there's a need, you can just buy some. [13:02] Kazuya     Right... [13:05] Kazuya     Chisato! [13:07] Chisato     Wh-What is it? [13:09] Kazuya     I was wondering... [13:13] Chisato     W-Wondering something about me? [13:15] Kazuya     Well... [13:17] Kazuya     Do you swim with your glasses on? [13:21] Sign     Girls' Changing Room [13:23] Chisato     Sheesh... I must still be half-asleep... [13:37] Frog     Ribbit! [13:41] Chisato     Ribbit? SIGN    Amasogi?!     Class rep spots a mysterious creature     The story of Chikaishi Chisato's strange encounter [13:43] Chisato     And that's what happened... [13:47] Osamu     And you think this creature was     the one stealing underwear? [13:50] Kazuya     It wasn't a cat or anything, was it? [13:53] Kiriha     It's most likely an amasogi. SIGN    The Yagokoro     Malison Forecast [13:55] Kiriha     The malison forecast today     was rather unsettling. [13:57] ---     Malison Density     80% [13:59] Shirou     Osamu, this calls for... [14:01] Osamu     Right. An undercover operation. [14:04] Shirou     Now then, people... [14:05] Shirou     We need to requisition your panties. [14:08] Chisato     Under no circumstances! [14:11] Tadataka     If mine will suffice, you can have them. [14:13] Shirou     It obviously has to be a girl's! [14:15] Chisato     That's sexual harassment! [14:16] Kiriha     Amasogi are like animals, true enough. [14:19] Kiriha     A bit of bait might be just what we need... [14:28] Kazuya     Sorry about this, Kiriha-san. [14:29] Kiriha     Put them on, take them off...     You just can't seem to decide, can you? [14:33] Kazuya     Well, you always sit around     the house without any on! [14:37] Kazuya     Uh, forget I said anything. [14:39] Shirou     Does this really have     any chance of working? [14:42] Osamu     It is a fairly primitive trap. [14:48] Kazuya     Did we catch something? [14:51] Kiriha     Careful, now. [14:52] ---     Right. [14:57] Shirou     What the hell? [14:59] Osamu     A frog... embroidered on a     pair of underpants, it seems. [15:02] Osamu     Little girls' panties. [15:04] Osamu     I'm guessing the size is 120. [15:07] Kazuya     Hey, Chisato... [15:09] Kazuya     Isn't this pair... [15:12] Chisato     No, it's not! [15:16] Frog     Ribbit! [15:19] Kazuya     It ran! [15:21] Kiriha     After it, Kazuya! [15:38] Kazuya     It's gathering malison?! [15:45] Frog     Ribbit! [15:48] Kiriha     Seems ready for a fight. [15:57] Kazuya     Kiriha-san! [15:57] Kiriha     Right! [16:04] Kiriha     It's collecting malison     from the surroundings. [16:06] Kiriha     Best to wrap this up quickly. [16:08] ---     Right! [16:11] Frog     Ribbit! [16:12] Kazuya     Shield Weave! [16:15] Kiriha     Grab it! [16:16] Kazuya     Hand Weave! [16:17] Frog     Ribbit! [16:23] Kazuya     Sledgehammer Weave! [16:32] Kazuya     No effect! [16:33] Kiriha     Squishy little beast, isn't it?! [16:35] Chisato     Kazuya-kun! [16:38] Shirou     What the hell is that?! [16:39] Osamu     I would assume it's the berserk amasogi. [16:41] Shirou     But it's a pair of p-p-p-panties! [16:44] Shirou     Indeed it is. [16:45] Kazuya     Hey, Chisato! [16:46] Kazuya     That pair belongs to you, doesn't it?! [16:50] Kazuya     I know it does!     I remember seeing them before! [16:53] Chisato     Why do you remember that?! [16:54] Frog     Ribbit! [16:58] Shirou     Whoa, it's even bigger! [17:00] Kiriha     You need to admit it, Chisato! [17:02] Kazuya     That's right! You were so desperate for     underwear, it gave birth to an amasogi! [17:07] Shirou     Damn, Chikaishi... Seriously? [17:09] Chisato     This is exactly why I     didn't want to admit it! [17:12] Chisato     Not to mention, I have no such desire! [17:14] Kazuya     You don't? [17:15] Kiriha     I thought that seemed odd. [17:19] Chisato     Kazuya-kun! [17:32] Kiriha     All right, Kazuya! We can't let this     thing continue to run rampant! [17:35] Kiriha     We need to silence it in one blow! [17:37] Frog     Ribbit! [17:43] Kazuya     Three-point... Spiral Weave! SIGN    Three-point Spiral Weave [17:49] Frog     Ribbit! [17:59] Kazuya     What do we do about this? [18:01] Chisato     It's true that those are mine, but... [18:05] Chisato     They're from when I was little,     and they'd been put away for so long... [18:09] Chisato     I have no idea how this happened. [18:12] Kazuya     What was it, then? [18:14] Kiriha     Kazuya. [18:16] Kiriha     Strip. [18:18] Kiriha     I said strip, boy! [18:19] Kazuya     Okay! [18:26] Kiriha     I think it was lonely. [18:32] Kiriha     There's sorrow in unused, discarded items. [18:36] Kiriha     Let this be its small comfort. [19:23] Chisato     Was this for the best? [19:27] Kiriha     Wouldn't you prefer to be with the     one you longed for in the end? [19:36] Chisato     I guess so. [19:40] Kazuya     Um... [19:43] Kazuya     My underpants... [19:58] Frog     Ribbit... [20:02] Kazuya     Thanks for the meal. [20:03] Kiriha     I am stuffed! [20:05] Kasumi     Would it kill you to     clean up after yourself?! [20:07] Sign     Student claims to be a witness [20:07] Osamu     I believe it was due to an     atmospheric plasma discharge. [20:14] Kazuya     I wonder what that frog's deal actually was... [20:18] ---     Aye... [20:19] Kiriha     If Chisato didn't give rise to the amasogi, [20:22] Kiriha     it must have occurred naturally. [20:24] Kazuya     But that's supposed to     take a long time, right? [20:29] Kiriha     If a decade or so was     enough to animate them, [20:31] Kiriha     the world would be crawling     with tsukumogami. [20:33] Kiriha     Dense malison or not,     there'd have to be more to it... [20:37] Kasumi     Ya-kun, is this all your laundry? [20:40] Kazuya     Yeah. [20:42] Kasumi     No underpants... [20:44] Kasumi     Did he lose them?     Did they fall off? Or maybe... [20:47] Web auction Signs     Men > Underaged [20:47] Web auction Signs     Super rare! Fresh! °A beautiful boy's under cludes pictures!) [20:47] ---     Remaining Time: [20:47] ---     hour [20:47] ---     Current price: [20:47] ---     5,000,000,000,000,000 yen (0 yen tax) [20:47] ---     Shipping: Seller pays [20:47] ---     Purchase [20:48] Kasumi     How much was it?!     How much did they go for?! [20:51] Kazuya     Do you think there'll     be trouble again soon? [20:55] Kiriha     No need to worry. [20:57] Kiriha     Is that not why we called upon your friends? [21:01] Kazuya     I guess you're right. [21:03] Kiriha     Now, then... [21:05] Kiriha     Sir, do you feel itchy anywhere else? [21:10] Kazuya     No, not really. [21:11] Kiriha     What about here? [21:14] Kazuya     Hey! [21:15] ---     Or perhaps... [21:17] Kiriha     down here? [21:19] Kiriha     Perky as usual, I see! [21:21] Kazuya     No! [21:27] Mimane     Looks like it went down already. [21:30] Akito     That's fine. [21:32] Yasuki     Do we have another lead? [21:35] Arumi     Yes. [21:37] Akito     For now, we'll do things Azami's way. SIGN    Next Episode Preview [23:20] Kazuya     Sunao-san, who challenged     me to a duel before, [23:22] Kazuya     asked me to come to her house alone. [23:25] Kazuya     I wasn't sure what to expect,     but what happened still surprised me! [23:29] ---     Next time on Tsugu Tsugumomo,     Chapter 2: "The False Fiancée." SIGN    The False Fiancée [23:32] ---     Don't miss it! SIGN    Don't miss it! SIGN    Illustration by: Oono Kousuke