E10 - Remote Island Syndrome (Part One)

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:23] ---
    Tell me what you're scheming.
[00:25] ---
    Nothing. Really.
[00:28] ---
    The syndicate has nothing to do with this.
[00:31] ---
    I did report this though.
    Isn't a retreat good for us?
[00:35] ---
    What gets me is that it was all set up by you.
[00:39] ---
    Miss Suzumiya is interested in
    privately owned deserted islands.
[00:44] ---
    She mentioned closed circles.
[00:46] ---
    What's that?
[00:48] ---
    A mystery term.
[00:50] ---
    A condition where outside contact is cut.
[00:53] ---
    Blizzard-isolated mountain shacks...
[00:55] ---
    ...or boarding houses cut off
    by a typhoon breaking the bridge?
[00:59] ---
    Thanks to the surroundings,
    the parties are cut off there.
[01:03] ---
    In other words, closed off.
[01:05] ---
    How's that related to this retreat?
[01:08] ---
    It's a secluded deserted island.
[01:10] ---
    If a storm comes, it'll be the ideal setting...
[01:14] ---
    ...for a closed circle, outside a
    blizzard-isolated mountain shack.
[01:18] ---
    Why am I talking to Koizumi
    in the middle of the big, blue sea?
[01:23] ---
    The day I finally got over Black Monday
    (when we got tests back)...
[01:28] ---
    The story goes back to that meeting.
[01:35] ---
    The answer is always in my heart.
[01:42] ---
    The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
[01:50] ---
    I don't know why, but I chose you.
[01:56] ---
    It won't stop now. Mr. Destiny deemed it so.
[02:02] ---
    I believe it's boring to just mimic.
[02:08] ---
    You'll be right, so I'll do what I feel as I feel it.
[02:17] ---
    It's an adventure, right, right?
[02:19] ---
    In this world where truth becomes fiction.
[02:24] ---
    We become stronger
    because we have dreams...
[02:28] ---
    ...not for the sake of someone.
[02:31] ---
    Please come with me.
[02:34] ---
    See me and my endlessly free self.
[02:40] ---
    Today's present that becomes
    tomorrow's past is the miracle.
[02:45] ---
    Let's grab the future.
[02:52] ---
    I believe you...
[03:01] ---
    Everyone's here.
[03:03] ---
    Today's meeting will be very important.
[03:03] ---
    Remote Island Syndrome Part 1
[03:05] ---
    I might make whoever came later than me...
[03:08] ---
    ...the eternal "it" for kick the can.
[03:11] ---
    Of course, I never heard there was
    going to be a meeting today.
[03:15] ---
    The SOS Brigade will have
    its first retreat this summer break!
[03:20] ---
    Retreat?
[03:21] ---
    Right. Retreat.
[03:22] ---
    What good does that do us?
[03:24] ---
    The location's decided. Right, Koizumi?
[03:27] ---
    One of my distant relatives is awfully rich.
[03:31] ---
    So rich that he bought a deserted
    island and built a summer house.
[03:36] ---
    That mansion recently
    had its completion ceremony.
[03:45] ---
    Rejoice, Koizumi.
[03:47] ---
    You jump two ranks for this achievement.
[03:51] ---
    I name you the SOS Brigade's vice-leader!
[03:52] ---
    Vice-leader
[03:54] ---
    I gladly accept.
[03:58] ---
    I'm not jealous.
[04:00] ---
    A three-night, four-day, luxurious tour!
[04:03] ---
    We're gonna go!
[04:04] ---
    I'm sure something
    very interesting is waiting there.
[04:08] ---
    And my role has already been determined.
[04:12] ---
    Supersleuth
[04:14] ---
    Now, let's think about a supersleuth.
[04:17] ---
    Supersleuths in mystery novels...
[04:20] ---
    ...always end up involved in
    one baffling incident after another.
[04:24] ---
    Why's that?
[04:25] ---
    If not, the stories wouldn't exist.
[04:27] ---
    Correct.
[04:29] ---
    Such cases are fiction.
    They only exist in surreal story worlds.
[04:34] ---
    But nothing comes of getting
    into such metafictional ideas.
[04:39] ---
    Especially since Miss Suzumiya
    is gung-ho about such a world.
[04:44] ---
    Come to think of it,
    she created the SOS Brigade for that.
[04:48] ---
    To encounter a surrealistic
    case like in mystery novels...
[04:52] ---
    ...you must first head to a fitting place.
[04:55] ---
    Because fictional supersleuths
    get involved in cases that way.
[05:00] ---
    We wouldn't just stumble across a case.
[05:03] ---
    It's true reality doesn't happen like fiction.
[05:07] ---
    But where we're heading right now...
[05:10] ---
    ...is what society would consider
    the perfect setting for a murder.
[05:14] ---
    Where is that society?
    It's a pretty close-knit one.
[05:18] ---
    In other words, where a supersleuth appears...
[05:21] ---
    ...a strange case is bound to happen.
[05:24] ---
    Those called supersleuths
    have powers that call cases to them.
[05:29] ---
    You sane?
[05:30] ---
    I always hold that I'm reasonably sane.
[05:34] ---
    All this about supersleuths
    and closed circles isn't what I think.
[05:38] ---
    I just traced over
    Miss Suzumiya's thought patterns.
[05:42] ---
    In other words, she wants to be one...
[05:46] ---
    ...a supersleuth.
[05:50] ---
    This one!
[05:51] ---
    So close!
[05:52] ---
    You can't be in old maid.
[05:54] ---
    Okay! Next, next!
[05:57] ---
    Too bad.
[05:58] ---
    You know, Kyon tried to leave me behind.
[06:02] ---
    Because I had no intention of bringing her.
[06:26] ---
    You got a warm welcome.
[06:28] ---
    Right!
[06:29] ---
    Take good care of her.
[06:31] ---
    I'll take her smile as payment
    and forgive my sister.
[06:34] ---
    How much longer?
[06:36] ---
    It's roughly a six-hour trip on this ferry.
[06:40] ---
    My acquaintance will be
    waiting for us at the port.
[06:44] ---
    From there, we board
    a special cruiser for another hour.
[06:48] ---
    A deserted island and
    towering mansion will be waiting for us.
[06:52] ---
    I've never been there, so I'm
    not sure what kind of building it is.
[06:56] ---
    I'm sure it's some strange building.
[06:59] ---
    Hey, know the architect's name?
[07:01] ---
    Why ask?
[07:02] ---
    I didn't ask.
[07:04] ---
    Yay! First place!
[07:05] ---
    Amazing!
[07:07] ---
    I did hear they commissioned
    a somewhat reputable architect.
[07:12] ---
    Somewhat is fine.
[07:13] ---
    If it's a mansion she's expecting,
    it's probably really strange...
[07:19] ---
    ...what an alcoholic Gaudí would
    design after being up 72 hours.
[07:25] ---
    Island! Mansion!
[07:26] ---
    It's the ideal locale for
    the SOS Brigade's summer retreat.
[07:31] ---
    I'm out! Third place!
[07:33] ---
    The loser is treating everyone to juice.
[07:36] ---
    I'll take 100% fruit juice.
[07:38] ---
    I want cola!
[07:40] ---
    I'll have royal milk tea.
[07:42] ---
    Say that after you win.
[07:43] ---
    A desolate island means a case!
[07:46] ---
    I hope nothing happens.
    I hope nothing happens.
[07:49] ---
    Though it's not certain what
    would be considered a "case."
[07:54] ---
    I hope this will be an amusing trip.
[08:05] ---
    Sister, Mikuru, let's go to the deck.
[08:08] ---
    A squid monster might come up.
[08:10] ---
    Sure!
[08:12] ---
    Let's go!
[08:13] ---
    Oh no... If it does, it'll be Nagato's turn.
[08:19] ---
    Jeez...
[08:23] ---
    Why are you sleeping, idiot? Wake up already.
[08:27] ---
    Don't you plan on taking this retreat seriously?
[08:34] ---
    I took a picture of you waking up.
[08:37] ---
    And of you asleep too.
[08:39] ---
    You were sound asleep.
[08:41] ---
    Asleep? Why would she sneak a picture of me?
[08:45] ---
    Maybe to put in a cute frame
    by her bedside, and every night...
[08:49] ---
    What's the smirk for?
    It makes you look stupid, so stop it.
[08:53] ---
    I'm having Mikuru be the acting
    SOS Brigade photographer.
[08:58] ---
    It's precious reference material
    of the SOS Brigade's activities.
[09:03] ---
    But I order what's taken.
[09:05] ---
    What's the value in my sleeping
    and just-getting-up faces?
[09:09] ---
    By capturing your silly, laid-back,
    sleeping face on this retreat...
[09:14] ---
    ...it's a warning for future members!
[09:17] ---
    For a lowly member to
    snore away while the leader's up...
[09:20] ---
    ...is against brigade morals, orders, and rules!
[09:25] ---
    Now, let's go!
[09:26] ---
    A mysterious island awaits!
[09:28] ---
    A mysterious island...
[09:31] ---
    It's not Panorama Island or Infant Island.
[09:34] ---
    At least, I'm hoping it doesn't
    suddenly float away or swim...
[09:38] ---
    It's all right.
[09:40] ---
    It's an ordinary, distant, lone island.
[09:43] ---
    There aren't any monsters
    or scientists with strange ideas.
[09:46] ---
    I guarantee it.
[09:48] ---
    I trust your guarantees the least.
[09:51] ---
    Ferry Terminal
[09:54] ---
    Hello, Mr. Arakawa. It's been a while.
[09:57] ---
    Mr. Arakawa/Butler
[09:58] ---
    Thanks for greeting us too, Miss Mori.
[09:59] ---
    Sonou Mori/Maid
[10:01] ---
    Sorry to trouble you.
[10:04] ---
    These are my incomparable friends.
[10:08] ---
    We have prepared a boat here.
[10:11] ---
    It is a half-hour boat ride
    to the island where our master awaits.
[10:15] ---
    It is inconvenient, but please understand.
[10:18] ---
    I don't mind at all!
    That's why it's a remote island.
[10:21] ---
    A half-hour? I wouldn't mind hours.
[10:24] ---
    I'm looking for the feel of the high seas.
[10:27] ---
    Kyon, Mikuru, you should
    be happier about this.
[10:31] ---
    There's a mansion and
    suspicious butlers and maids!
[10:35] ---
    Japan only has two other islands like this!
[10:38] ---
    Not even two.
[10:39] ---
    W-Wow, amazing.
[10:41] ---
    I'm looking forward to this...
[10:45] ---
    Wow...
[10:50] ---
    Is she studying Miss Mori
    for what being a maid means?
[10:54] ---
    She's strangely serious.
[10:57] ---
    So what's that building called?
[11:00] ---
    Meaning?
[11:01] ---
    House of Black Death,
    Lira Manor, Koketsu Castle...
[11:04] ---
    It has a name like that, right?
[11:05] ---
    Not really.
[11:07] ---
    Maybe there are strange devices,
    or the architect died unusually...
[11:12] ---
    ...or sleeping in a room means death.
[11:14] ---
    Nothing.
[11:15] ---
    The atmosphere died.
[11:17] ---
    Hey, is there a masked master of the house...
[11:20] ---
    ...or three pleasantly insane sisters,
    and none were left?
[11:25] ---
    All have yet to happen.
[11:27] ---
    Then the chance it will is very high.
[11:31] ---
    Perhaps that is the case.
[11:35] ---
    I see it! Is that the mansion?
[11:38] ---
    That is the summer home.
[11:41] ---
    It's rather ordinary.
[11:45] ---
    Who's that?
[11:47] ---
    The master of the house? He looks young...
[11:50] ---
    The other guest.
[11:52] ---
    Yutaka Tamaru
[11:53] ---
    The master of the house's brother, Yutaka Tamaru.
[11:56] ---
    I've met him once before.
[11:58] ---
    Tell us that in advance.
[12:00] ---
    This is the first I've heard
    of other people being invited.
[12:06] ---
    Welcome!
[12:30] ---
    Keiichi Tamaru/Master of the house
[12:30] ---
    Oh, welcome.
[12:34] ---
    Thank you so much for inviting all of us today.
[12:38] ---
    I'm truly grateful that we can
    stay in such a grand estate.
[12:42] ---
    I give thanks on behalf of us all.
[12:45] ---
    Oh, this is quite different
    from what I've heard from Itsuki...
[12:50] ---
    What I heard was
    a girl who talked more frankly...
[12:53] ---
    Really?
[12:54] ---
    Nice to meet you, master of the house!
[12:57] ---
    To be blunt, did this
    mansion have any incidents?
[13:00] ---
    And do locals call this island
    something in legends and fear it?
[13:04] ---
    Things like that are my hobby.
[13:10] ---
    I sympathize with your hobbies,
    but there've been no incidents yet.
[13:15] ---
    Since we just finished
    construction the other day.
[13:19] ---
    I haven't heard the island
    was haunted, now or ever.
[13:23] ---
    It was deserted.
[13:24] ---
    Enough standing around and talking. Come in.
[13:27] ---
    It's Western style,
    so you can keep your shoes on.
[13:31] ---
    Wow, nice room!
[13:33] ---
    It's plain.
[13:34] ---
    Well, it's good we get our own rooms.
[13:38] ---
    The doors lock, right?
[13:40] ---
    Of course. They can't autolock you out...
[13:42] ---
    ...but I'd appreciate not losing your keys.
[13:46] ---
    You'll stay with me, right?
[13:48] ---
    You behave.
[13:50] ---
    Sure.
[13:54] ---
    The fact nothing's
    suspicious is suspicious.
[13:57] ---
    Then what if it were?
[13:59] ---
    Of course it's suspicious at face value.
[14:02] ---
    In other words, there's not
    one thing not suspicious in her view.
[14:08] ---
    Got it.
[14:09] ---
    What?
[14:10] ---
    Who did it.
[14:10] ---
    Did what?
[14:12] ---
    Nothing's even started yet. We just got here.
[14:15] ---
    My gut says it's this place's owner, Keiichi!
[14:18] ---
    The first to go will be Mikuru!
[14:21] ---
    He's our host. What trouble are you making?
[14:24] ---
    At least act like a normal high schooler...
[14:30] ---
    Oh, right. We should swim.
[14:32] ---
    When you're at the sea,
    there's nothing to do other than swim.
[14:37] ---
    Jeez...
[14:38] ---
    Well, I'm sure not even Haruhi
    really wishes someone were dead.
[14:50] ---
    The best part about this trip
    is this very moment.
[14:53] ---
    This is what an ocean retreat is.
[14:59] ---
    Each person has their own pleasures.
[15:03] ---
    Spare time should be spent however you want.
[15:07] ---
    We need to offer entertainment
    for Miss Suzumiya especially...
[15:11] ---
    ...to divert her boredom.
[15:14] ---
    Hey, Kyon, Koizumi! Get down here!
[15:19] ---
    Me too!
[15:21] ---
    Over here, over here!
[15:24] ---
    Here!
[15:26] ---
    Beach ball!
[15:47] ---
    This is delicious. Who made it?
[15:50] ---
    Arakawa the butler is also the head chef.
[15:52] ---
    Not bad, right?
[15:54] ---
    I'd definitely like to say thanks.
    Call him over later.
[16:00] ---
    She sure eats a lot...
[16:02] ---
    Would you like something to drink?
[16:05] ---
    What's wrong?
[16:06] ---
    I hate peppers.
[16:07] ---
    You won't grow up like Miss Asahina then.
[16:11] ---
    You don't eat splendid meals
    like this that often.
[16:19] ---
    Is it okay that it's all free?
[16:21] ---
    I wish the school cafeteria was this generous.
[16:39] ---
    And so, living it up on
    Mr. Tamaru's courtesy well enough...
[16:43] ---
    ...the first day ended with nothing unusual.
[16:46] ---
    How much of a relief would it
    have been if the story ended here?
[16:52] ---
    On the second morning,
    the weather suddenly turned stormy.
[17:00] ---
    Our master is very bad with mornings...
[17:04] ---
    ...and is in a foul mood when he awakens.
[17:07] ---
    I hope you'll excuse him
    in the mornings like this.
[17:10] ---
    We appreciate your understanding.
[17:12] ---
    We're out of luck with
    a typhoon at a time like this.
[17:16] ---
    The typhoon seems quick,
    so it should clear up in two days.
[17:20] ---
    I'm sure it'll leave as suddenly as it came.
[17:24] ---
    But there was no word of
    a typhoon anywhere yesterday.
[17:28] ---
    Whose head did this storm come out of?
[17:32] ---
    But now it's really
    a deserted island in a storm.
[17:35] ---
    It's a rare chance.
[17:37] ---
    There really might be a case for us after all.
[17:42] ---
    The waves were much bigger
    than what the boat could handle.
[17:47] ---
    We're unwillingly cooped up
    on this island thanks to Haruhi's wish.
[17:54] ---
    A closed circle...
[17:56] ---
    It can't be.
[17:59] ---
    We couldn't go out, so we spent
    the day in the basement game room.
[18:03] ---
    Take this! Super Ultra Miracle Eccentric Serve!
[18:08] ---
    "Me" "Sister" "Koizumi"
    "Mikuru" "Yuki" "Kyon"
[18:08] ---
    Passion!! Ping-Pong Tournament!!
[18:08] ---
    Winner: ME!
[18:16] ---
    Hey, hey, is that fun?
[18:25] ---
    All right, riichi.
[18:26] ---
    I call ron. It's probably worth 10,000.
[18:29] ---
    Miss Suzumiya, that's yakuman.
[18:32] ---
    Thank God we're not counting.
[18:33] ---
    Oh, quite a hubbub.
[18:36] ---
    I think I'll join in.
[18:39] ---
    Here you go.
[18:40] ---
    What's "furikomi"?
[18:51] ---
    I have some work I need to get done,
    so I'll excuse myself now.
[19:01] ---
    Keiichi and Yutaka Tamaru...
[19:03] ---
    Mr. Arakawa and Miss Mori...
[19:05] ---
    For Koizumi's associates, they seem normal.
[19:08] ---
    There are too few characters
    to brew up a strange case.
[19:11] ---
    Riichi!
[19:15] ---
    Who's the king?
[19:17] ---
    Me!
[19:19] ---
    Then, ♪2, turn around,
    look back at us, and say, "I love you."
[19:24] ---
    Who's ♪2?
[19:32] ---
    I love you.
[19:34] ---
    That's not it, Yuki!
    You have to be more emotional.
[19:41] ---
    I love you.
[19:43] ---
    Kyon, show her.
[19:44] ---
    Why me?
[19:45] ---
    It doesn't matter why. It's the king's orders.
[19:49] ---
    I love...
[19:49] ---
    Never mind.
[19:51] ---
    What a selfish king.
    Wait, that's how she usually is.
[19:56] ---
    I thought I could read past the next page
[19:58] ---
    of adolescence with a laugh...
[19:58] ---
    I love you. I love you so much.
[20:02] ---
    ...but the middleman cut differently.
[20:02] ---
    I love you. I love you so much.
[20:04] ---
    I don't know what kind they were
    and what they cut though.
[20:08] ---
    If I knew, I'd like to order them
    to cease operation for a year or so!
[20:16] ---
    Hey, Haruhi...
[20:18] ---
    Softy. When you talk retreats,
    you can't forget pillow fights.
[20:23] ---
    How's she so lively after staying up so late?
[20:26] ---
    A pillow fight?
[20:28] ---
    No wonder she scoured through
    the second-floor rooms...
[20:32] ---
    ...for pillows after breakfast.
[20:33] ---
    So many!
[20:33] ---
    She picked up all our weapons, huh?
[20:41] ---
    Mr. Arakawa, is something wrong?
[20:43] ---
    Yes, I sent Mori to Master Yutaka's
    room earlier, but he's not in.
[20:49] ---
    Yutaka is gone?
[20:51] ---
    His bed hasn't been used...
[20:53] ---
    ...and we searched everywhere
    but haven't found him.
[20:57] ---
    How about asking Keiichi?
[20:59] ---
    We tried to call the master's chamber,
    but received no reply.
[21:04] ---
    What's that? Yutaka is missing,
    and Keiichi isn't answering?
[21:10] ---
    In short, that would be it.
[21:13] ---
    Why don't we enter Keiichi's room?
    Isn't there a spare key?
[21:17] ---
    The master's chamber is different.
[21:20] ---
    He is the only one with the spare key.
[21:23] ---
    He brought work documents,
    so it's to be on the safe side.
[21:27] ---
    We should go visit him.
[21:29] ---
    Kyon, let's go. My heart is racing.
[21:32] ---
    Come on, Yuki, Mikuru. Sister, you stay here.
[21:46] ---
    Keiichi? Keiichi! Answer if you're here!
[21:53] ---
    No good...
[21:56] ---
    This is the last resort.
    Let's ram this door and break through.
[22:01] ---
    Perhaps time is of the essence.
[22:03] ---
    All right.
[22:04] ---
    Let's do it.
[22:11] ---
    Only in the drama world
    can you break something like this.
[22:38] ---
    Impossible...
[22:40] ---
    You're joking, right?
[22:49] ---
    If we figured out the globe
    like we would a riddle...
[22:55] ---
    ...we could all go anywhere together.
[22:58] ---
    To the end of time, BOOOON!
[23:01] ---
    This feeling that is a warp and a loop.
[23:05] ---
    With an imagination that engulfs
    anything and everything, let's play.
[23:11] ---
    Something on one sunny day,
    more fun than any magic possible...
[23:16] ---
    ...endlessly pours down. It's not impossible.
[23:22] ---
    When we meet again tomorrow,
    we're all humming as we smile.
[23:28] ---
    Let's gather happiness. Such a thing is so easy.
[23:33] ---
    Chase after me. Try to catch it.
[23:38] ---
    A big dream... You like dreams, right?