The Magical Girl and the Evil Lieutenant Used to Be Archenemies

An evil organization invades and destroys everything in its path. The brains of the brutal operation is the king’s right-hand man, an evil lieutenant named Mira. Everything changes when a magical girl named Byakuya Mimori tries to stop the evil group in their tracks. When Mira confronts her, he knows it’s love at first sight. What will become of Mira and Byakuya, stuck between orders and love?

Season 1

E1 - Won't Kill For Love
E2 - The (taking down of the) magical girl belongs to (no one but) me
E3 - Now Back to the Drawing Board
E4 - A Habit of Chasing What Moves
E5 - We're Enemies
E6 - What Magical Girls Are
E7 - They're Friends...?
E8 - Before Christmas
E9 - On Christmas Night
E10 - A Day with Mr. Familiar
E11 - 53-Year Old Building
E12 - Side B / Side M

Season 1

E1 - Won't Kill For Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:07] ---
    Would you like this warmed up?
[00:10] ---
    Uhm...
[00:12] ---
    I need to check your age for this.
[00:14] ---
    Huh?! Such a pain…
[00:16] ---
    Eh?
[00:17] ---
    C'mon, I’m in a hurry here.
[00:23] ---
    What was that?! An earthquake?
[00:33] ---
    Huh? Are they filming some kinda movie?
[00:36] ---
    Wha--
[00:37] ---
    Oh my god!
[00:42] ---
    Time to go to work, Byakuya.
[00:46] ---
    Yes.
[01:54] ---
    This is as far as you go, Mr. Evil Lieutenant.
[02:00] ---
    I will not let you have your way.
[02:19] ---
    It was love at first sight.
[03:30] ---
    It would appear that you failed
     to suppress the magical girl, correct?
[03:35] ---
    What happened, Mira?
[03:36] ---
    Did you get a stomachache?
[03:38] ---
    Indeed, what happened, Mira?
[03:40] ---
    There’s much we don't know about the magical girls.
[03:43] ---
    We're still studying them at this stage, no?
[03:47] ---
    It sure seems like we'll have to do
    a lot of prep work to take them down.
[03:52] ---
    He sure is taking his sweet time, I’m gonna doze off…
[03:55] ---
    Can you really handle this on your own?
[03:58] ---
    There’s no need for concern.
[04:01] ---
    Arrangements for a ground invasion are already in motion.
[04:04] ---
    I guarantee...
[04:07] ---
    Our King of Evil will receive good news.
[04:12] ---
    You stood in our way the other day, Magical Girl.
[04:19] ---
    Because today you're in for...
[04:22] ---
    a present.
[04:25] ---
    Do you like chiffon cake?
[04:27] ---
    I do.
[04:29] ---
    Episode 1
    Won't Kill For Love
[04:38] ---
    Your shoulder’s wet…
[04:39] ---
    I’m fine.
[04:41] ---
    But…
[04:46] ---
    Thank you, Mr. Evil Lieutenant…
[04:50] ---
    It's nothing…
[04:51] ---
    Just a momentary olive branch.
[04:55] ---
    You have a big heart, Mr. Lieutenant.
[04:59] ---
    What the hell’s this feeling?!
[05:01] ---
    It's like my chest's in a vice!
[05:04] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[05:09] ---
    I was born to an elite evil family,
    worked my way up the elite evil ladder...
[05:13] ---
    got an elite evil job, and now I'm the elite
     evil right-hand man to the King of Evil...
[05:18] ---
    all that and now my elite evil life...
[05:20] ---
    …is totally derailed!!
[05:22] ---
    Ever since I met her, something's been very wrong with me!!
[05:25] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[05:26] ---
    What the hell's wrong with me, I'm a Lieutenant of Evil?!
[05:27] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[05:31] ---
    I've destroyed and avenged nations for goodness sake!
[05:33] ---
    Are you unwell?
[05:33] ---
    It's treasonous—
[05:37] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant...
[05:40] ---
    your forehead does feel warm.
[05:45] ---
    It’s not just my head! My whole body’s on fire!
[05:48] ---
    Are you alrig—
[05:49] ---
    Most definitely not!
[05:53] ---
    This chiffon cake is delicious.
[05:56] ---
    The ones from our Evil Empire are nothing special.
[06:00] ---
    In any case, are you sure you're fine
    accepting something from your enemy?
[06:03] ---
    What if I put something in it?
[06:06] ---
    You wouldn’t do that…
[06:08] ---
    Even if you did, I’d have to eat something eventually…
[06:12] ---
    I only drank water for the past week…
[06:16] ---
    Huh? Don't humans die when they don't eat?
[06:19] ---
    Yes, that's true.
[06:23] ---
    I started living alone once I graduated from middle school.
[06:27] ---
    Now I work part-time, lend a hand at a care facility,
     and work as a magical girl.
[06:33] ---
    I forget to eat when I'm busy,
    but I can think of that as saving money.
SIGN    1\frz330\pos(191,259)}Grumble~*
[06:39] ---
    Even if my stomach is empty, my heart is full.
[06:45] ---
    I think I understand,
[06:46] ---
    but it’s not good to neglect yourself.
[06:49] ---
    Yes, I’ll be mindful.
[06:52] ---
    It would hurt our Evil Organization's reputation if we beat you when you're not at your best.
[06:56] ---
    Indeed. You’re very kind.
[06:59] ---
    I’m not kind, it’s a matter of pride!
[07:03] ---
    Alright.
[07:03] ---
    As such!
[07:04] ---
    You should let me send you a year’s worth of rice!
[07:07] ---
    Huh? That’s too kind…
[07:11] ---
    Welcome back, Lieutenant!
[07:14] ---
    You must be tired. I'll bring some tea to your room.
[07:15] ---
    No, thank you.
[07:37] ---
    What am I doing?
[07:40] ---
    Remember your true purpose.
    I am a Lieutenant of Evil.
[07:44] ---
    And as the King of Evil’s right-hand man,
     it’s my job to inform them
[07:48] ---
    of our enemy, the magical girls, and make a report!
SIGN    Thank you for your order!
SIGN    Popular with women
SIGN    Famous no-bake cheese cake
SIGN    3,718 yen free shipping
[07:59] ---
    Magical Girl, today’s the day I’ll knock you out!
[08:04] ---
    With today’s no-bake cheesecake, I mean.
[08:06] ---
    Okay...
SIGN    Plop...
[08:11] ---
    Sorry, yesterday I said I’d take better care of myself…
[08:16] ---
    But I didn’t have time to sleep…
[08:19] ---
    Why would you do that, Magical Girl?
[08:22] ---
    I needed the money…
[08:23] ---
    What a cruel world!
[08:26] ---
    When a land shark took the facility I grew up in…
[08:32] ---
    that's when he showed up and said to me…
[08:37] ---
    You need money, don't cha?
SIGN    Smack
[08:42] ---
    You need money, don't cha?
SIGN    Smack
[08:44] ---
    Don't cha?
SIGN    Smack
[08:45] ---
    You can become a magical girl and save the world
     or you can sell your . Your choice, kid.
[08:50] ---
    Don’t cha wanna buy back that facility?
[08:52] ---
    I-I do!
[08:54] ---
    But afterward,
[08:56] ---
    I found out he was in on the scheme
     with the land shark the whole time.
[09:00] ---
    Those were ya°°za!
[09:02] ---
    Thanks to this tree’s shade, I've made a full recovery.
[09:06] ---
    Thank you, Mr. Evil Lieutenant.
[09:09] ---
    You should give up on being a magical girl.
[09:12] ---
    Huh…?
[09:14] ---
    From what I gather from your story,
    you don't actually want to fight.
[09:24] ---
    I won’t give up.
[09:26] ---
    You…
[09:27] ---
    Nothing changes the fact that someone has to do this job.
[09:31] ---
    And…
[09:35] ---
    I…
[09:37] ---
    I get to see you.
[09:43] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant… are you upset?
[09:45] ---
    Dammit!
[09:46] ---
    You’re cute! Too stinkin’ cute!
[09:48] ---
    What do you want!? You want my black card?
[09:51] ---
    Take it! I give! Buy whatever you want!
[09:55] ---
    Please calm down, Mr. Lieutenant.
[09:59] ---
    You got so worked up because of me...
[10:02] ---
    I’m sorry.
[10:04] ---
    Let’s head home for the day.
[10:07] ---
    But I want you to give it some thought…
[10:09] ---
    About quitting being a magical girl.
[10:12] ---
    If you don’t, the next time we meet,
    we might be forced to kill each other.
[10:21] ---
    By the way, what would you like to eat next time?
[10:23] ---
    Oh, please don’t worry about it...
[10:28] ---
    Am I being toyed with by my enemy, that magical girl?
[10:33] ---
    I cannot let this continue.
[10:35] ---
    I am a Lieutenant of Evil!
[10:37] ---
    Remember…
[10:38] ---
    Remember the days you spent doing horrible atrocities to become the King’s right-hand man…
[10:42] ---
    Rise, servant of Evil…!
[10:46] ---
    Wow, it’s just so good…!
SIGN    Get in line.
    Famous fruit tart
[10:48] ---
    So refreshing, it’s a taste that women love~!
[10:51] ---
    Place your order through a toll-free call!
[10:54] ---
    It’s late at night, but we’re ready for your call~!
[10:55] ---
    Yes, hi. I saw your ad just now on TV…
[10:59] ---**
    Yes… one fruit tart, please.

Season 1

E2 - The (taking down of the) magical girl belongs to (no one but) me

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Magical Girl 01




    Name: Unknown
    Age: Unknown
    Birthdate: Unknown
    Blood Type: Unknown
    Address: Unknown
[00:01] ---
    A lot of information is missing about this magical girl…
[00:06] ---
    I’ll see to it that this is straightened out.
[00:09] ---
    No one can defy or escape from a cunning
[00:12] ---
    and level-headed man such as I.
[00:20] ---
    Lieutenant, sir, I brought tea!
[00:24] ---
    My apologies…
[00:26] ---
    Good work today, sir.
[00:29] ---
    Oh, sure…
[00:30] ---
    Let us assist in subjugating the magical girl.
[00:33] ---
    No need.
[00:34] ---
    Huh?
[00:35] ---
    The task of taking down
     the magical girl is mine, and mine alone.
[00:41] ---
    Let me reiterate:
[00:43] ---
    The magical girl is mine!
[00:46] ---
    Is that all?!
[01:48] ---
    Episode 2:







    The (taking down of the)
    magical girl belongs to (no one but) me
[01:51] ---
    That was too easy. And you didn’t
     even put up a fight…
[01:56] ---
    Um, the payment...
[02:02] ---
    Name your price.
[02:04] ---
    I'll... go ahead and charge it all at once, sir…
SIGN    Limited time only
     Dream Pudding
     Made with Fujiwara-san’s
     Household Dream Eggs

SIGN    Mr. Lieutenant!
SIGN    I’m sorry I’m late.
SIGN    I couldn’t get off work.
SIGN    Looks like she worked at Law°°° today.
SIGN    Cute!
SIGN    How many jobs do you have right now?
SIGN    Let me think...
SIGN    So many!
[02:43] ---
    How can that be…
[02:46] ---
    Oh, but… many of them are one-time gigs.
[02:49] ---
    Isn’t working at the convenience store tough enough?
[02:51] ---
    I guess…
[02:53] ---
    Helping customers is challenging.
[02:55] ---
    Let me see you try it.
[02:57] ---
    Huh?
[02:58] ---
    I feel a bit nervous being formal with you…
[03:02] ---
    But here goes… Ahem.
[03:05] ---
    Would you...like your bento warmed up…?
[03:10] ---
    Warm it for me, please…!
[03:11] ---
    No wait, it’s already warmed!
     To a pleasant temperature!!
[03:16] ---
    Oh, I forgot… I’m still wearing this.
[03:20] ---
    Right.
[03:21] ---
    We’re enemies, so you’d best put on something
     more formidable for your opponent.
[03:26] ---
    Of course.
[04:10] ---
    I’m finished changing.
[04:12] ---
    Hm...
[04:14] ---
    One more time.
[04:16] ---
    Huh?
[04:19] ---
    Thank you for the pudding.
[04:22] ---
    Keep eating sweets and you’ll be sick of them.
[04:24] ---
    How about lunch next time?
[04:26] ---
    Do you like sandwiches on focaccia?
[04:28] ---
    Anything nutritious is fine with me.
[04:32] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant, your sleeve is burnt…
[04:35] ---
    Ah, it must’ve been grazed by some fire.
[04:38] ---
    I’ll see to a new one—
[04:39] ---
    I can mend it.
[04:42] ---
    It’s like... we’re married…
[04:44] ---
    The cup…
[04:45] ---
    We’re mutual enemies.
[04:47] ---
    You have no obligation to do such things.
[04:50] ---
    I can do it quickly though…
[04:52] ---
    I’m very good at repairing holes in clothing.
[04:57] ---
    I'd do anything for her!!
[04:59] ---
    The pot…
[05:01] ---
    Even when I've mended my old clothes,
     they can still be worn as loungewear…
[05:07] ---
    Like my ruined work uniform,
[05:11] ---
    or my uniform from middle school.
[05:14] ---
    Even my gym clothes…
[05:16] ---
    Shall we go shopping?
[05:18] ---
    You work so much.
[05:20] ---
    You should be able to buy some new clothes.
[05:22] ---
    But my familiar…
[05:24] ---
    The cat who turned me into a magical girl…
[05:28] ---
    He looks after all of the money I earn.
[05:32] ---
    He manages my assets and finds job openings for me…
[05:36] ---
    He’s helping me out a lot with this and that.
[05:40] ---
    Oh, and to make jobs easier for me,
    he made me some business cards.
[05:44] ---
    Here.
[05:45] ---
    A magical girl needing a business card…?
SIGN    Night Massage at Your Service ❤
SIGN    Magical Girl Heaven
SIGN    Glass Happiness
SIGN    Let's make the best
    of memories tonight...
[05:48] ---
    Destroy all of these.
[05:51] ---
    But I can give massages, though…
[05:55] ---
    This is no ordinary massage!
[05:57] ---
    Seriously, show a little more awareness!
SIGN    Glass Happiness
[06:02] ---
    Is this your name as a magical girl?
[06:05] ---
    Yes. I was given that name…
[06:07] ---
    It means that happiness can be as fragile as glass…
[06:10] ---
    A magical girl without hope.
[06:15] ---
    But…
[06:16] ---
    Being a magical girl isn’t
    as terrible a job as I thought.
[06:21] ---
    Maybe, it’s because of your kindness.
[06:28] ---
    Thank you for everything, Mr. Lieutenant.
[06:36] ---
    It’s not kindness.
[06:38] ---
    I already said everything I do is out of pride!
SIGN    S
    q
    u
    e
    e
    e
    z
    e
[06:47] ---
    Welcome back, Lieutenant, sir!
[06:49] ---
    It’s the lieutenant!
[06:51] ---
    A lieutenant with an unparalleled cruelty!
[06:53] ---
    As obscured behind those glasses as ever.
[06:55] ---
    Devoid of all emotion.
[06:58] ---
    A…An applique!?
[07:06] ---
    That’s right. An applique.
[07:09] ---
    Got a problem with that?
[07:14] ---
    I’m setting a poor example for my subordinates.
[07:21] ---
    No! No! No!
[07:23] ---
    Remember, you are the embodiment of evil.
[07:34] ---
    Oh crap!
[07:46] ---
    You people are tra—
[07:50] ---
    I was able to complete my work
     without any strange palpitations.
[07:54] ---
    Ah, no!
[07:57] ---
    Let go…of me!
[08:13] ---
    Kafrizz!
[08:28] ---
    To think you’d be taken advantage
    of by such a low-grade monster…!
[08:34] ---
    I-I’m sorry…
SIGN    Auuugggh!
[08:39] ---
    Without even thinking, I went and
    took care of that monster and saved her.
[08:43] ---
    What is happening to me?
[08:48] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[08:51] ---
    Wear that and head home.
[08:54] ---
    Your clothes... are so big and warm.
[09:00] ---
    What is happening to me?!
[09:02] ---
    What do you want from me?!
    What’s the right thing to even do?!
[09:05] ---
    Is this a tactic of yours!?
[09:06] ---
    To take away my will to fight!?
[09:09] ---
    Well, it's working!!
[09:13] ---
    I’m sorry for the trouble I caused you today...
[09:16] ---
    and thank you for walking me home.
[09:20] ---
    You’re pretty careless...letting me know
     your location and thanking me.
[09:28] ---
    My name is Mimori.
[09:31] ---
    Mimori…
[09:32] ---
    Mimori Byakuya.
[09:35] ---
    Byakuya…
[09:37] ---
    Thank you…for the jacket, too.
[09:43] ---
    Why are you thanking me?
[09:45] ---
    Because you said you’d buy a new one soon enough…
[09:49] ---
    We all have a jacket or two in the organization.
[09:54] ---
    It’s just…
[09:57] ---
    I didn’t feel the need to replace it just yet.
[10:04] ---
    You truly are kind, Mr. Lieutenant.
[10:09] ---
    I’ll see you tomorrow, kind Mr. Evil Lieutenant.
[10:18] ---
    Until we meet again, Magical Girl.
[11:32] ---
    Hey there, Byakuya...
[11:37] ---
    Nice jacket ya got there.
[11:44] ---
    I finally know where she lives and her real name.
[11:49] ---
    When I present this information to the higher-ups,
[11:51] ---
    that will be the end of the magical girl.
[12:02] ---
    Mimori Byakuya...
[12:05] ---
    Ms. Byakuya...
[12:08] ---
    Lieutenant, I brought tea!
[12:13] ---
    Ah...
[12:17] ---
    My apologies...
SIGN    Episode 3:




    Now Back to the Drawing Board
[12:30] ---

Season 1

E3 - Now Back to the Drawing Board

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] ---
    What is happening with the ground invasion?
[00:04] ---
    Mira, you’re in charge of
     subjugating the magical girl, no?
[00:08] ---
    Even you seem to be struggling with this one.
SIGN    1\pos(210,292.666667)}Sadalsuud*
[00:11] ---
    Seems the man once called the
    wisest of the evil army has fallen.
SIGN    1\pos(266.666667,290)}Alcyone*
[00:15] ---
    Wait, wait, did you know? About Mira, I mean...
[00:19] ---
    You mean his obsession with the magical girl?
SIGN    1\pos(404.666667,298)}Spica*
[00:22] ---
    Of course I’ve heard!
[00:24] ---
    Cease this nonsense.
SIGN    1\pos(328,296.666667)}Betelgeuse*
[00:26] ---
    This is Mira we are talking about.
    He no doubt has a plan in mind.
[00:30] ---
    Mira!
[00:31] ---
    If you need anything, please let me know!
SIGN    pos(330.666667,300.666667)\i1}Fomalhaut*
[00:34] ---
    I'll help you!
SIGN    pos(381.333333,299.333333)\i1}Bellatrix*
[00:38] ---
    Tell us, Mira, what’s going on?
[00:44] ---
    I apologize for worrying you.
[00:46] ---
    However, everything is going
    according to plan and right on schedule.
[00:49] ---
    The results will show themselves in time.
[00:53] ---
    Oh, something urgent came up. Excuse me.
[00:58] ---
    It’s me. What about the usual preparations?
[01:02] ---
    He’s being cautious.
[01:04] ---
    I cannot imagine that he
    would be ruled by his emotions.
[01:09] ---
    He is the brilliant and ruthless mind of our empire.
[01:14] ---
    You wanted an aged A5 Yonezawa
    chateaubriand steak for Ms. Mimori, right?
[01:20] ---
    Don't make me repeat myself!
[01:21] ---
    And be quick about it!
[02:25] ---
    Thank you.
[02:27] ---
    I’ve never been given a bouquet of roses before…
[02:31] ---
    They’re nothing more than weeds in our evil empire.
[02:36] ---
    Not to copy you...
[02:38] ---
    ...but I also brought you a present today.
[02:41] ---
    A flower?
[02:43] ---
    I’ve been making these fake flowers lately.
[02:47] ---
    On the side.
SIGN    Badump...
[02:49] ---
    Now she's doing side hustles...
[02:51] ---
    You work too much.
[02:53] ---
    I've told you before:
[02:54] ---
    You need to take better care of yourself.
[02:56] ---
    Yes.
[02:58] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant is really very kind…
[03:02] ---
    Ever since I met him,
    he’s always been concerned about me.
[03:07] ---
    Sometimes, he’s kind. And other times, he’s harsh.
[03:10] ---
    It’s hard to believe he’d be part of an evil empire.
[03:14] ---
    It’s hard to believe he’s not human, too.
SIGN    Stare
[03:20] ---
    W-what is it?
SIGN    Stare
[03:24] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant, why are you shaking?
[03:30] ---
    I don’t know why he reacts the way he does.
[03:33] ---
    Maybe it’s because we’re different.
[03:39] ---
    Can I see you again tomorrow, Mr. Lieutenant?
[03:47] ---
    Hey, Byakuya. Go gemme some booze.
[03:51] ---
    Oh, okay.
[03:54] ---
    What are you doing?
[03:56] ---
    That slime battle from the other day…
[03:58] ---
    The nerds’ll pay big bucks for this one~
[04:04] ---
    What am I doing... in a place like this?
[04:09] ---
    Mira, honey, don’t work so hard~!
[04:13] ---
    Give yourself a break and head over to here.
[04:16] ---
    I’ve got a bottle with your name on it.
[04:18] ---
    No, I'm just...
[04:19] ---
    What?!!
[04:20] ---
    Alcyone! You went there on your own again?!
[04:28] ---
    I’ve no doubt that so-called familiar
     is taking advantage of her…
[04:32] ---
    If that keeps up, she’s going
    to get more exhausted, I’m sure.
[04:36] ---
    No, what does it even matter!
[04:39] ---
    We’re enemies!
[04:41] ---
    I’m an employee here, my name is Byakuya.
[04:41] ---
    What does it matter if she exhausts herself.
[04:44] ---
    It has no effect on—
[04:44] ---
    I’ll have a seat with you.
[04:48] ---
    Let me get you another drink…
[04:51] ---
    I don’t need another dri—
[04:53] ---
    Oh, Mr. Lieutenant…
[04:57] ---
    Why are you here…!?
SIGN    The magical
     girl is a
    nightclub
     hostess...?
[05:01] ---
    It’s not that I’m here because I want to be!
[05:04] ---
    My coworkers forced me to—
[05:08] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant… I…
[05:12] ---
    She’s even cute when she cries…
[05:14] ---
    No, this isn’t the time or place!

[05:27] ---
    Take your time…
[05:28] ---
    Talk to me when you’re ready.
[05:37] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[05:38] ---
    Mhm?
[05:40] ---
    There… There’s…!
[05:42] ---
    Yes?
[05:46] ---
    Th…There’s an erotic video of me being sold…
[05:56] ---
    Where...?
[06:00] ---
    Who...?
[06:03] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant, calm down.
[06:05] ---
    I am calm…
[06:07] ---
    I just want whoever's done this to know...
[06:10] ---
    Know the fear the evil empire
     will bestow upon their enemies.
[06:14] ---
    They will repent for their sins
     while drowning in a sea of blood!
[06:18] ---
    Calm down.
[06:20] ---
    Ah, no!
[06:23] ---
    Let go…of me!
[06:26] ---
    Kafrizz!!!
[06:28] ---
    How dare you disgrace her!
[06:31] ---
    Killing you will be too easy…
[06:33] ---
    Unnecessarily overworking her,
    living off her earnings, you sinful being…
[06:43] ---
    What are you talkin’ about?
[06:45] ---
    I’m just a guide for the magical girl…
[06:48] ---
    No, you’re not.
[06:49] ---
    The closer we became, the more I knew.
[06:52] ---
    You are no familiar.
[06:55] ---
    You are…
[06:57] ---
    ...nothing more than a person in a cat costume…!
[07:00] ---
    You punk!
SIGN    pos(258.666667,36.666667)\i1}(Holy)*
[07:02] ---
    You ever see a giant cat before? Huh?!
[07:05] ---
    What’s all this gotta do with you?
[07:09] ---
    Isn’t chewing people up your area of expertise? Huh?
[07:16] ---
    Whatever glory she earns
    as a magical girl and money from her jobs...
[07:21] ---
    It all belongs to me.
[07:23] ---
    Even her body belongs to me.
[07:26] ---
    She's gotta be a maiden to become
    a magical girl but sooner or later…
[07:37] ---
    Us familiars have no concept of death.
[07:40] ---
    I’ll appear before you again, Byakuya…ya…ya…ya.
[07:47] ---
    That was the familiar sent to look over the magical girl.
[07:50] ---
    I should inform the higher-ups.
[07:53] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[07:56] ---
    Thank you for helping me.
[08:01] ---
    Um, if you’d like…
[08:04] ---
    Would you have dinner with me?
[08:08] ---
    Her home cooking…?!
[08:13] ---
    I wonder what she’ll serve me…
[08:16] ---
    Just give me a few minutes.
[08:19] ---
    I’ll grill it right now…
[08:21] ---
    Oh, I did send that stuff…
SIGN    A5
     grade
SIGN    chateaubriand
    steak
[08:24] ---
    Thank you for dinner.
[08:26] ---
    Did you enjoy it…?
[08:28] ---
    Yes. It was all excellent.
[08:31] ---
    Oh, good.
[08:32] ---
    I’ve only ever seen you drinking something, Mr. Lieutenant.
[08:36] ---
    You noticed something like that?
[08:38] ---
    Yes… I wondered if you didn’t like eating…
[08:43] ---
    Or maybe just didn’t like sweets…
[08:46] ---
    It’s not that.
[08:47] ---
    I’m usually in the mood for sweets when I’m tired.
[08:51] ---
    My mother always made some for me in my childhood.
[08:54] ---
    Your mother sounds wonderful.
[09:03] ---
    That’s right, she doesn’t…
[09:08] ---
    At the facility, we sometimes had treats, too.
[09:11] ---
    There was a bakery nearby that
     would give us bread crusts to snack on.
[09:17] ---
    There weren’t many so we’d fight over them…
[09:22] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
SIGN    I’ll max out my bank account to support her.
[09:28] ---
    I’ll be going now.
[09:29] ---
    Um… Your jacket…
[09:32] ---
    Is it okay if I keep it a little longer?
[09:36] ---
    That’s fine with me…
[09:38] ---
    I want to get a Royal Happiness cleaning done,
    but it’s three times as expensive as a normal one…
[09:44] ---
    I’ll wear it home right now, so don't worry about it.
[09:54] ---
    I was looking at your jacket every day…
[10:06] ---
    It’s okay, really…
[10:13] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant, can I see you again tomorrow…?
[10:23] ---
    I’ll have to settle this tomorrow…
[10:27] ---
    Mira!
[10:29] ---
    Fomalhaut.
[10:31] ---
    I’m going to start helping you out
    with subjugating the magical girl!
[10:36] ---
    I said the magical girl was mine…
[10:40] ---
    Pleasure to work with you!
[10:41] ---
    He’ll only get in the way.
[10:44] ---
    Should I get rid of him?
[11:50] ---
    I’ve had to be careful of how I conduct myself lately.
[11:54] ---
    Why do I feel this way about her?
SIGN    pos(489.333333,54)\i1}Characteristics: Cute, Small
    Has many jobs, Busy, Sleepy, Lacking nutrition...
    Good at sewing, Unfortunate (Cause: Familiar)*
[11:57] ---
    What causes it, and what can I do about it?
[12:01] ---
    Could it be that she’s so sad
    that I just feel sorry for her?!
[12:01] ---
    1\pos(324.666667,14)}(Unfortunate)*
[12:04] ---
    In other words, I should make her happy.
[12:09] ---
    Let’s start with operation gift-giving!
[12:12] ---
    So she’ll have a life full of stuff,
    and a life full of joy!
SIGN    Episode 3




    Now Back to the Drawing Board
SIGN    Episode 4






    A Habit of Chasing What Moves
SIGN

Season 1

E4 - A Habit of Chasing What Moves

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] ---
    Wow...
[00:02] ---
    So this is where you square
    off with the magical girl!
[00:05] ---
    It’s so peaceful!
[00:07] ---
    Yeah.
[00:08] ---
    Fomalhaut:
[00:09] ---
    He's from a noble family, and we've known each other
    for a long time since joining the organization.
[00:15] ---
    I really meant it, if something's ever up,
    please don’t hesitate to talk to me!
[00:20] ---
    You sure are persistent--
[00:22] ---
    Then, can you look me in the eyes?
[00:34] ---
    Cool it.
[00:36] ---
    Sorry, sorry.
[00:38] ---
    I wasn't doubting you or anything.
[00:41] ---
    An evil lieutenant with an
     inhumane cruelty who's feared by all.
[00:45] ---
    Never one to be moved by emotion.
[00:47] ---
    No, emotions don't even exist
    when he sets his eyes on his target!
[00:51] ---
    Just the idea of you being
    overcome by a female enemy...
[00:54] ---
    I’d have to see it to believe it!
[00:57] ---
    Oh. Mhm.
[00:59] ---
    But I’m relieved.
[01:01] ---
    It wouldn’t be smart to
    betray the organization.
[01:04] ---
    But if there was a lady in trouble,
    you'd be one to help them.
[01:09] ---
    I know cause we’re friends!
[01:11] ---
    Fomalhaut.
[01:12] ---
    Hm?
[01:13] ---
    Go... fetch!
[01:18] ---
    I'm on it!
[02:20] ---
    Episode 4






    A Habit of Chasing What Moves
[02:23] ---
    For the time being,
    I came today to see what you do!
[02:27] ---
    Sure, that's no problem.
[02:29] ---
    This must be the King of Evil’s
     way of keeping an eye on me.
[02:34] ---
    I can’t lose my credibility
    with the King…
[02:38] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant...!
[02:43] ---
    I feel bad for her, but the time has
    come to settle things with her!
[02:48] ---
    I’m sorry I’m late!
SIGN    Sway...
[02:58] ---
    No, don't get swayed away.
[03:01] ---
    This is a good opportunity.
[03:02] ---
    Today...I’ll defeat the magical girl!
[03:06] ---
    You’re quite fast, Magical Girl.
[03:10] ---
    I couldn’t wait to see you,
    Mr. Lieutenant, so I ran here!
[03:16] ---
    That's exactly how I feel!
[03:18] ---
    There’s never a moment
    I don’t feel that way!
[03:21] ---
    Staaaare...
[03:27] ---
    This is a strategy.
[03:28] ---
    Become amicable and let
    them drop their guard!
[03:32] ---
    I get it! You're so smart, Mira!
[03:35] ---
    This has gotten off track already.
[03:37] ---
    What can I do now that she's
    right in front of me...
[03:40] ---
    That’s it! If I don't look at her, then
     I can't do much of anything!
[03:46] ---
    Oh no.
[03:47] ---
    The more I try to turn away,
    the more I end up staring.
[03:49] ---
    Why is she wearing something like that?
[03:52] ---
    Who chose it for her?
[03:54] ---
    I’m her enemy but I really must admire…!
[03:55] ---
    Staaaare...
[03:58] ---
    There's something hypnotic
    about her eyes! Be careful!
[04:02] ---
    Got it!
[04:04] ---
    Actually, Mr. Lieutenant,
    I made a lunch for you.
[04:10] ---
    It’s to thank you for all your help.
[04:13] ---
    I hope you like it…
[04:15] ---
    You didn't... have to be so thoughtful.
[04:18] ---
    Staaaare...
[04:20] ---
    It’s poisoned!
[04:21] ---
    Danger!
[04:24] ---
    Now, how to get out of this…
[04:29] ---
    No one's foolish enough to eat
    something they know could kill them.
[04:33] ---
    I’ll just make something up.
    It's better to avoid eating it.
[04:37] ---
    Um, Mr. Lieutenant...
[04:40] ---
    Did you already eat lunch?
[04:43] ---
    No matter what's in this, I'll eat it!
[04:47] ---
    Mira!!
[04:54] ---
    Mira, you don't hesitate at all, do you?
[04:58] ---
    Hesitate?
[05:01] ---
    You mean about subduing others by force?
[05:03] ---
    Is there a reason why you're saying this now?
[05:10] ---
    If you hesitate, then you
    shouldn't be in the organization.
[05:13] ---
    Hesitation will kill you someday.
[05:17] ---
    If not physically, then mentally.
[05:21] ---
    It's okay if I die!!
[05:25] ---
    I ate it all!
[05:27] ---
    Mira...!
[05:29] ---
    If served poison, think of it as a spice...
[05:32] ---
    Mira!!
SIGN    frz18.6\pos(593.333333,254)\i1}Respect*
[05:36] ---
    That was a fierce fight…
[05:39] ---
    I didn't know it could be
    such a grueling battle...
[05:41] ---
    If that’s what it looked
    like to you, then good.
[05:44] ---
    I thought I’d have to eliminate him...
[05:47] ---
    You’re amazing, Mira!
[05:49] ---
    I think I’ll join you next time!
[05:51] ---
    Then you gotta introduce me to her!
[05:55] ---
    He's dead meat.
[06:00] ---
    My mission is as follows.
[06:03] ---
    I’ll explain my problematic relationship
     with her without raising suspicion…
[06:07] ---
    while maintaining my reputation…
[06:09] ---
    and making sure he stays away from her.
[06:13] ---
    Mira!
[06:14] ---
    Looking forward to working with you today!
[06:17] ---
    At the very least,
    I will be the one defeating her…
[06:21] ---
    Be on guard.
[06:22] ---
    If you inadvertently touch her,
    I'll ki--, she'll kill you.
[06:26] ---
    Got it!
[06:28] ---
    I brought my colleague with me today.
[06:31] ---
    It’s nice to meet you,
    I’m a magical girl.
[06:35] ---
    Thanks for looking out for Mira.
[06:40] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant always treats me so well.
[06:45] ---
    He’s very kind… I’m very grateful.
SIGN    Cute ♥
[06:50] ---
    You're on a mission! Don’t be suspicious!
[06:57] ---
    I’m Fomalhaut!
[07:00] ---
    I’ve known Mira for a long time.
[07:02] ---
    Nice to meet you, miss.
[07:06] ---
    Watch it! I warned you about touching her.
[07:09] ---
    You almost fried your hand off!
[07:11] ---
    What?! That’s dangerous!
[07:18] ---
    Why am I a magical girl?
[07:21] ---
    Because I make money doing it…
[07:23] ---
    Wha— You’re a magical girl
    yet you have such little conviction?!
[07:27] ---
    You put your life on the line
    for a reason like that?!
[07:32] ---
    How many times must I tell you?!
[07:33] ---
    If you touch her, it’s over!
[07:36] ---
    I forgot!
[07:40] ---
    By the way, this is my gift today.
[07:43] ---
    Thank you.
[07:47] ---
    Is it poisoned?
[07:48] ---
    It's possible.
[07:49] ---
    That's why you shouldn't eat it.
[07:51] ---
    It makes you look like a couple!
[07:53] ---
    I'm going to pretend to eat it.
[07:55] ---
    What about me?
[07:57] ---
    Just watch!
[08:05] ---
    Staaaare...
[08:08] ---
    He must want me to watch and learn!
[08:10] ---
    He better back off.
[08:11] ---
    Uh, you can have half my share…
[08:14] ---
    Thank you, but there’s no need!
[08:16] ---
    You should worry about yourself…
[08:18] ---
    But...
[08:20] ---
    You've got some here...
[08:27] ---
    Thank you.
[08:33] ---
    Right! I think I'm getting it!
[08:36] ---
    Do you like sweets?
[08:38] ---
    I like anything nutritious.
[08:40] ---
    Then, I’ll bring something
    with me next time.
[08:44] ---
    I’d like to make you happy.
[08:47] ---
    Oh, thank you.
[08:49] ---
    I got it, right, Mira?!
[08:53] ---
    Maybe I don't got it!
[08:58] ---
    She seemed a bit aloof.
[09:00] ---
    Maybe I'm making her put her guard up?
[09:03] ---
    It's not you, she's just normally like that.
[09:06] ---
    The only times she relaxed her expression
    and engaged in conversation was with me.
[09:13] ---
    That's something special...only with me...
[09:17] ---
    Hm? Mira!
[09:20] ---
    Mira! There's too many of them!
[09:23] ---
    You know… We didn’t
    accomplish anything today…
[09:27] ---
    I’m sorry, Mira.
[09:29] ---
    I was trying to lend you a hand
     in maintaining your reputation…
[09:33] ---
    Fomalhaut...
[09:37] ---
    There's something else you could do for me.
[09:39] ---
    Go... fetch!
[09:42] ---
    I'm on it!
[09:44] ---
    Got you...
[09:45] ---
    That mutt is going to look to the ends of the
     earth for the ball he thought I threw...
[09:54] ---
    Mr. Fomalhaut left?
[09:56] ---
    Yes.
[09:58] ---
    I see.
[10:00] ---
    He’s a very cheery person.
    I thought he was wonderful.
[10:07] ---
    Are you interested in him?
[10:10] ---
    Huh?
[10:12] ---
    No, nevermind.
[10:19] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant...
[10:25] ---
    Are you pouting?
[10:29] ---
    ...No.
[10:31] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[10:33] ---
    What is it?
[10:34] ---
    I’m very happy.
[10:39] ---
    Your friend. Your name.
[10:44] ---
    I learned a little more about
    you than I knew before...
[10:55] ---
    Mr. Mira...
[11:03] ---
    You are...
[11:04] ---
    Mira!!
[11:06] ---
    I found a little rabbit!
[11:09] ---
    Fomalhaut.
[11:10] ---
    Who told you to go find a
    rabbit? Where's the ball?
[11:14] ---
    Oh, I forgot!
[11:16] ---
    He's dead.
SIGN
SIGN    Episode 5




    We're Enemies

Season 1

E5 - We're Enemies

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:08] ---
    Mimori Byakuya’s the kinda girl
     who's always about ready to give up.
[00:14] ---
    But she's also quick to catch
    onto things, so I'll give her that.
[00:25] ---
    Hey, Bya-hic-ya... gemme more booze.
[00:31] ---
    Okay.
[00:33] ---
    She doesn’t really get attached to anything.
[00:37] ---
    While you’re at it, some snacks too.
[00:39] ---
    Oh, okay.
[00:42] ---
    There are a few things that are a no-go for her, though.
[00:46] ---
    Oh and let me at them titties.
[00:48] ---
    Uhm...no…
[00:52] ---
    Generally speaking, she's never put up a fight.
[01:00] ---
    Not once.
[01:06] ---
    We’ve got work, Byakuya.
[01:08] ---
    The evil organization is on the move.
[01:12] ---
    Oh, and…
[01:14] ---
    Why the heck are you in there?
[01:16] ---
    It helps me relax.
[01:24] ---
    I'm heading out.
[01:32] ---
    The Magical Girl and the Evil Lieutenant Used to be Archenemies.
[01:38] ---
    I've been stumped about what presents to get her lately.
[01:44] ---
    It’s about time I change hands and try something new.
[01:48] ---
    Lieutenant, sir! Can I have a moment of your time?
[01:53] ---
    This will certainly please you!
[01:56] ---
    Here, sir!
[02:13] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant...
[02:21] ---
    We’ve captured the magical girl!
[02:23] ---
    We actually did it!
[02:24] ---
    Prepare yourself!
[02:26] ---
    For the horrors of our interrogation!
[02:27] ---
    Lieutenant, sir!
[02:29] ---
    Go on!
[02:30] ---
    Do it!
[02:31] ---
    Go on!!!
[02:35] ---
    Right.
[02:37] ---
    Let's begin our cruel and brutal interrogation.
[02:42] ---
    With a little something...
SIGN    Pop
[02:44] ---
    Like this!
[02:45] ---
    Or this!
SIGN    Bam
[02:47] ---
    Or something like this!
[02:54] ---
    How about it? Scared of me yet?
[02:56] ---
    You aren’t injured, are you?
[02:58] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[03:00] ---
    I was so shocked, I saw red.
    But at least that's one less problem for now.
[03:05] ---
    That won't be the end of it though...
[03:07] ---
    I can’t afford to slip up in front of the camera.
[03:13] ---
    I don’t want things to end this way for her.
[03:16] ---
    I’ll need to find her an escape route…
[03:23] ---
    Don’t be weird! Focus! Focus, dammit!!
[03:27] ---
    I need to wait for an opening.
[03:30] ---
    I’ll just have to keep up appearances until then.
[03:33] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant...
[03:35] ---
    Um... I...
[03:39] ---
    I...
[03:40] ---
    What?
[03:41] ---
    I...
[03:44] ---
    I have to...go to the bathroom...
[03:52] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[03:55] ---
    What am I, some pervert?
[03:57] ---
    You…
[04:02] ---
    You need to hold it.
[04:04] ---
    I’m going to give you an opening to run.
[04:06] ---
    But… Wouldn’t that cause you problems?
[04:10] ---
    So what if it does?
[04:12] ---
    Do you want to be interrogated?
[04:19] ---
    I know what must be done.
[04:22] ---
    You’ve already saved me many times over.
[04:27] ---
    And if this is your job, then…
[04:34] ---
    Do what you will to me…!
[04:39] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[04:41] ---
    Dammit…
    This is a harder mission than I thought!
[04:47] ---
    Oh, but I don’t want to dirty this room
[04:51] ---
    So I really should use the bathroom…
[04:53] ---
    Problem 1, she has no desire to run away!
[04:57] ---
    Problem 2, there are cameras.
[04:59] ---
    And Problem 3, I kinda like this situation!
[05:03] ---
    U-Uhm, Mr. Lieutenant?
[05:07] ---
    What is it?
[05:09] ---
    This isn't good.
[05:10] ---
    I need a breakthrough…
[05:12] ---
    I’m back, Mira!
[05:14] ---
    I just got in!
[05:16] ---
    Fomalhaut!
[05:17] ---
    I finally found the ball you threw!
[05:20] ---
    I don’t remember throwing a summer delicacy
     like that, but thanks for playing!
[05:25] ---
    I found my breakthrough!
[05:27] ---
    Fomalhaut has an upstanding attitude
    and wouldn’t dare question something like this.
[05:32] ---
    He’ll distract me so she can make her escape…!
[05:37] ---
    I’m sorry I didn't knock!
[05:39] ---
    I know how much fun you have with this stuff!
[05:42] ---
    Just what are you talking about?
[05:43] ---
    As long as it's mutually beneficial, I won't say a word.
[05:47] ---
    But make sure you treat her body with care!
[05:51] ---
    Hey, wait-!
[05:52] ---
    Bye now!
[05:54] ---
    Our breakthrough is gone…
[05:58] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[06:01] ---
    Nothing we can do about it now.
[06:03] ---
    Actually, I thought I’d have to
     bring this to a close eventually…
[06:08] ---
    And since we’re here…
[06:10] ---
    Why don’t we have a little fun?
[06:13] ---
    We’ve known each other for a while now….
[06:16] ---
    Consider it a gesture of goodwill.
[06:20] ---
    Something that can’t be left on a recording…
[06:25] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant… what…!
[06:31] ---
    Who is making rounds—
[06:33] ---
    Eeeeeeepp!!
[06:35] ---
    What are you doing in the monitor room…?
[06:38] ---
    I-it’s not what you think!
[06:39] ---
    We'll go on patrol!
[06:40] ---
    We're on it!
[06:54] ---
    Th… That tickles…
[06:56] ---
    Try not to say that out loud.
[06:59] ---
    I made it so that no one can see you right now...
[07:03] ---
    Right...
[07:04] ---
    Just a little bit longer, then pretend to faint
     and I can release your restraints.
[07:13] ---
    M-Mr. Lieutenant...
[07:17] ---
    Why... are you helping me?
[07:22] ---
    I didn't... like that you
    accepted defeat right from the start.
[07:28] ---
    You should... want more than that.
[07:38] ---
    Byakuya-chan...
[07:42] ---
    The younger children might be afraid,
    so I'm going to pick them up.
[07:48] ---
    You're okay waiting by yourself, right?
[07:53] ---
    Yes.
[08:07] ---
    There were children younger than me at the facility,
    and we were all in the same position.
[08:13] ---
    But I never felt like I could speak out.
[08:17] ---
    I couldn't say what I wanted...
[08:27] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[08:30] ---
    You're awake.
[08:34] ---
    We're... in my room...
[08:38] ---
    You actually stopped breathing and passed out.
[08:43] ---
    Of course, you did what I said, but why didn't you
    say something before passing out?
[08:50] ---
    I thought I could handle it...
[08:55] ---
    You're truly...
[09:05] ---
    I'm heading back.
[09:09] ---
    I've got a lot to deal with
    because of what happened with you.
[09:14] ---
    If something like that happens again,
     I'm not sure I can protect you.
[09:19] ---
    So you should be ready.
[09:21] ---
    I know. I won't trouble you again.
[09:26] ---
    I'll be more ready next time.
[09:29] ---
    That's not what I meant!
[09:31] ---
    Why are you...!
[09:53] ---
    I'm going.
[09:55] ---
    Okay.
[09:58] ---
    I'm going.
[10:00] ---
    Okay...
[10:02] ---
    I'm really going now...
[10:12] ---
    You want me to leave?
[10:20] ---
    Pl...
[10:22] ---
    Please stay...with me...
[10:29] ---
    Really now...
[10:34] ---
    Showing me another one of your weaknesses...
[10:41] ---
    Let's not forget, though.
SIGN    Episode 5




    We're Enemies
[10:45] ---
    That we're enemies.
[11:59] ---
    You... You bastard...!
[12:02] ---
    Mimori Byakuya is a failure.
[12:08] ---
    The girl that I guide...
[12:11] ---
    will be the new magical girl.
SIGN
SIGN    Episode 6



    What Magical Girls Are

Season 1

E6 - What Magical Girls Are

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] ---
    Mimori Byakuya is a failure.
[00:08] ---
    The girl I guide…
[00:11] ---
    will be the new magical girl.
[00:22] ---
    That rain yesterday seems like a dream now.
[00:28] ---
    It’s as if we’ve been blessed.
[00:32] ---
    Both myself and the magical girl I’ve chosen…
[00:38] ---
    Fck!
SIGN    °°She's a magical girl.
[00:42] ---
    God dammit!
[00:43] ---
    Did the bitterness of the coffee send you into a rage?
[00:46] ---
    Fck!
[00:49] ---
    You’re so lively, Hibana.
SIGN    °°She's a magical girl.
SIGN    Episode 6



    What Magical Girls Are
[01:59] ---
    My name is Kagari Hibana.
[02:02] ---
    I’m a 15-year-old who loooves cute things!
[02:05] ---
    You wouldn't believe my surprise when I heard that
     I could become the magical girl of my dreams...
[02:11] ---
    So I consulted with my friends, Mr. Bunny and Mr. Bear.
[02:15] ---
    This is a job only Hibana-chan can do!
[02:17] ---
    Stay strong, Hibana-chan!
SIGN    I-I’ll try…
[02:20] ---
    I-I’ll try…
SIGN    You can do it! ☆
[02:22] ---
    You can do it!
[02:25] ---
    That should be easier for you to drink.
SIGN    (Holy)
[02:29] ---
    This is the person who made me a magical girl, Mr. Bird.
[02:35] ---
    I’m very grateful to him.
[02:40] ---
    I'll kill you!
[02:41] ---
    But I get too embarrassed to express how I really feel.
[02:47] ---
    Not enough sugar for you?

[02:51] ---
    Hibana.
[02:52] ---
    We've got work.
[02:54] ---
    Can you do it?
[03:50] ---
    Help those kids!
[03:53] ---
    She's got a staff!
[03:55] ---
    Think she'll use some magic?
[03:58] ---
    Fck!
[04:01] ---
    Fck! Fck! Fcking!
[04:06] ---
    I am strong!
[04:08] ---
    Aren't those brass knuckles?!
[04:10] ---
    That ain't magic at all!
[04:13] ---
    Take care!
[04:15] ---
    I will...
[04:19] ---
    Huh?
[04:23] ---
    Hibana! Are you alright?
[04:26] ---
    Hiss Hiss Hiss
[04:27] ---
    Your wounds--
[04:46] ---
    A new magical girl...
[04:52] ---
    We had trouble with one and now there’s another?!
[04:55] ---
    This is going to put the Lieutenant in a tight spot…!
[05:00] ---
    Huh?
[05:01] ---
    Huh?
[05:09] ---
    What’s happened to the Lieutenant?
[05:11] ---
    He seemed down after his latest kill.
[05:13] ---
    He's always like that after he finishes a big job.
[05:16] ---
    I defeated that magical girl.
[05:19] ---
    Since I can't defeat Mimori Byakuya...
[05:22] ---
    doing that was the only way to preserve my reputation.
[05:26] ---
    That also puts to bed the incident
     of me killing all those underlings.
[05:32] ---
    Our kinds are enemies. This is for the best.
[05:36] ---
    It was just a good opportunity...
[05:40] ---
    His cruelty has yet to wane.
[05:44] ---
    That’s right. So, don't be stupid...!
[05:48] ---
    Bye!
[05:50] ---
    See you!
[05:57] ---
    Fck!
[06:06] ---
    Hibana!
[06:11] ---
    Are you in pain?
[06:17] ---
    I’m sorry I put you in harm's way, Hibana…
[06:22] ---
    Hibana… There’s something I must tell you.
[06:28] ---
    It’s about how magical girls are structured.
[06:32] ---
    First, as a familiar,
[06:34] ---
    I'm a messenger of God sent from Heaven
    to the Earth below entrusted with a message.
[06:40] ---
    You could also call us angels.
[06:43] ---
    Among the humans, we choose girls,
    of pure mind and body...
[06:47] ---
    and bestow upon them the power of a magical girl.
[06:51] ---
    However, I am not the only one. There are many of us.
[06:56] ---
    Meaning, you are not the only
     magical girl. There are many others.
[07:01] ---
    The responsibility does not fall on your shoulders alone…
[07:05] ---
    Even so, I believe you have what it takes
     to become the best magical girl.
[07:11] ---
    However, I will never ask you
    to risk your life or prove yourself.
[07:18] ---
    I should have told you sooner. I’m sorry…
[07:29] ---
    Even if someone better than me comes, I’ll still do it…
[07:34] ---
    Because I admire them.
[07:36] ---
    It’s what I want.
[07:39] ---
    Even if there are several others.
[07:43] ---
    I’ll still do it…
[07:48] ---
    This girl...
[07:51] ---
    This girl I’ve chosen… This singular magical girl.
[07:56] ---
    Thank you...
[08:04] ---
    Fck.
[08:06] ---
    Fck is not just a response, but also an affirmation.
[08:10] ---
    Let's stand and fight together. The two of us.
[08:17] ---
    It’s been a few days since I’ve seen Mr. Lieutenant.
[08:21] ---
    I know we’re enemies and it’s not as if
    we’ve made a promise to meet every day…
[08:28] ---
    But I think about him every day…
[08:31] ---
    Hey, newbie, get over here!
[08:35] ---
    C-Coming!
[08:37] ---
    Lieutenant, sir, I’ve brought some tea to calm your nerves!
[08:38] ---
    Yes, thank you.
[08:40] ---
    Don’t mention it…!
[08:42] ---
    Please allow me to tailor you a new uniform!
[08:44] ---
    We shouldn't leave it like this!
[08:46] ---
    Uh, apologies...
[08:48] ---
    Mira! I finally found the ball, look!
[08:52] ---
    Isn’t it so cute?
[08:53] ---
    Think the organization will let me keep it?
    What should I name it?
[08:57] ---
    But I’ll never know its sex if it stays all rolled up.
[09:00] ---
    It's a serious problem!
[09:02] ---
    It would be rude in the armadillo kingdom
     if I force it to unfurl itself, wouldn’t it?
[09:06] ---
    And if it’s a girl, it would be rude of me
     to give it a male name… Hm?
[09:12] ---
    You guys want to meet it, too?
[09:18] ---
    I can’t get my work done at the organization.
[09:21] ---
    It's best if I hurry and receive my judgment.
[09:26] ---
    Long time, no see, Magical Girl…
[09:30] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[09:32] ---
    Let’s put an end to this relationship!
[09:36] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant...
[09:38] ---
    I haven’t seen you lately, I was getting worried…
[09:43] ---
    You know, don't you...
[09:45] ---
    That I disposed of one of your magical girl comrades.
[09:50] ---
    Huh? I have comrades?
[09:52] ---
    Huh?
[09:55] ---
    Wait… You didn’t know?
[09:58] ---
    No, I’ve never interacted with any other magical girls…
[10:03] ---
    Did you think there were others?
[10:05] ---
    There’s a recession everywhere you look…
[10:08] ---
    I forgot, she’s the queen of hard times.
[10:12] ---
    I had heard there were others
    in the same line of work as me…
[10:17] ---
    Same line of work…
    At least you were aware of it…
[10:22] ---
    I see. So, what has she been doing…
[10:27] ---
    I wonder if I'm cold-hearted?
[10:31] ---
    I’d heard from other magical girls…
[10:36] ---
    But as long as you were safe…
    That’s all I cared about….
[10:45] ---
    M-Mr. Lieutenant?
[10:48] ---
    No, you're not.
[10:49] ---
    Huh?
[10:51] ---
    That's just who you are. And this is ...
[10:57] ---
    For saying something like that when my guard's down.
[11:03] ---
    Fck!
[11:05] ---
    I’ll kill you this time!
[11:07] ---
    You’re that magical girl from last time.
[11:11] ---
    You’re still alive...
[11:14] ---
    Hi...
[11:17] ---
    Hibana-chan?
[12:26] ---

[12:27] ---
    Episode 7



    They're Friends...?

Season 1

E8 - Before Christmas

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:07] ---
    Hey, Byakuya!
[00:09] ---
    I've found a great job for you.
[00:12] ---
    Welcome back.
[00:13] ---
    It's an easy one, all you gotta do is carry shabu-shabu.
[00:17] ---
    The catch is you can't wear underwear!
[00:21] ---
    Uhm, why can't I wear underwear?
[00:25] ---
    Is that because of the shabu-shabu?
[00:28] ---
    Of course it is! It's a huge reason!
[00:33] ---
    Imagine if you were the one wearing undies if nobody else was.
[00:37] ---
    That'd just be perverted.
[00:39] ---
    You've been gettin' all embarrassed wearin' undies anyway~
[00:45] ---
    N-No thank you!
[00:46] ---
    Don't go actin' all innocent...
[00:49] ---
    I'm sure you let him rub up on you a few times.
[00:52] ---
    Rub?
[00:54] ---
    Speaking of rub, I made these...
[00:57] ---
    They're the kind of pickles you make with a rub.
[01:00] ---
    Are these okay for dinner?
[01:02] ---
    You're pretty amazing, smoothly changin'
     the topic from rubbing to pickled foods.
[01:09] ---
    Is that the only side dish?
[01:11] ---
    Money's tight this month...
[01:13] ---
    Your social outings were expensive...
SIGN    Week of 12/3
SIGN    Food
SIGN    (Drinks at home)
[01:16] ---
    I had to though.
SIGN    Total
SIGN    Entertainment
SIGN    Luxury Items
[01:18] ---
    What with the end of the year party and Christmas.
[01:20] ---
    Tis the season to cozy up with people.
[01:22] [SONG] ---
    Lucky Christmas Shopping District
[01:22] [SONG] ---
    Lottery Drawing
[01:22] [SONG] ---
    10 Pieces
    for 1 drawing!
SIGN    Episode 8



    Before Christmas
[01:26] ---
    Christmas...
[02:29] ---
    A seasonal cosmetic gift set...
[02:33] ---
    That'd be a good one, but she doesn't
    wear makeup so that won't work.
[02:37] ---
    Jewelry might send the wrong message...
[02:39] ---
    Whatcha lookin' at?
[02:40] ---
    My, oh my, a present for your girl?
[02:43] ---
    It is a Christmas present!
[02:45] ---
    Would you like us to give you some advice?
[02:47] ---
    I'm good. Thanks.
[02:49] ---
    That's cold of you...
[02:51] ---
    Women know what other women want.
[02:53] ---
    Alcyone's just a femboy tho~
[02:56] ---
    And Spica's just a legal loli tho~
[02:58] ---
    I may look like a kid but
     I'm a full-grown woman on the inside!
[03:01] ---
    Hmm, is that so?
[03:03] ---
    I know that the inside might be more
    like the outside than you think, tho~?
[03:07] ---
    Ohemgee, you're sooo rude!
[03:09] ---
    "The inside..." "More than you think...?"
[03:12] ---
    Does that mean...
[03:14] ---
    Only Alcyone knows why Spica is like that because...
[03:17] ---
    Oh, the immorality!
[03:21] ---
    Bad girl!
[03:22] ---
    Don't get all aroused over your fantasies
     of your colleague's foolishness!
[03:26] ---
    Oh, it's Bella.
[03:31] ---
    Yes, what is it?
[03:32] ---
    Mira's trying to pick out a present for his girlfriend.
[03:35] ---
    We're trying to give him some ideas.
[03:38] ---
    Mira's girlfriend?
[03:40] ---
    Girlfriend...
[03:42] ---
    Girlfriend...?!
[03:46] ---
    You have a girlfriend, Mira?
[03:48] ---
    Don't get the wrong idea.
[03:50] ---
    I'm just trying to find a gift for a lady friend of mine.
[03:53] ---
    Is that all? How lame!
[03:57] ---
    I'm not surprised. We all know
     Mira's in love with his work.
[04:00] ---
    For a lady friend?
[04:02] ---
    Could it possibly be...me?
[04:04] ---
    You know that certain presents
    have meanings behind them, right?
[04:08] ---
    Yeah, like giving lipstick means "I want to kiss you."
[04:12] ---
    K-Kiss? M-Mira wants to kiss me?!
[04:15] ---
    A necklace can mean "I want to tie you down."
[04:19] ---
    Tie as in confine?! Like M-Mira will tie me up?!
[04:22] ---
    And clothes mean...
[04:24] ---
    You wanna strip them off~
[04:28] ---
    S-St-Strip them off?!
[04:33] ---
    What's all this, Mira? There are so many.
[04:36] ---
    Each present has a different meaning.
[04:39] ---
    But when you put them all together...
[04:43] ---
    ...It comes to mean "I want all of you".
[04:48] ---
    Mira, wait...that's...
[04:52] ---
    Noo!!
[04:54] ---
    You fiend! You four-eyed fiend!
[04:57] ---
    It's indecent! It's so indecent!
[04:59] ---
    What happened with Bella?
[05:01] ---
    She gets like that sometimes.
[05:03] ---
    So, when are you giving it to her?
[05:06] ---
    Have you made plans with her yet?
[05:09] ---
    No, not yet.
[05:10] ---
    What, why not?
[05:11] ---
    It's almost Christmas!
[05:13] ---
    Right?!
SIGN    **
[05:18] [SONG] ---
    Lucky Christmas Shopping District
[05:18] [SONG] ---
    The Big Christmas




     Lottery Event
[05:18] ---
    I want meat...
[05:20] ---
    Are you alright with just a fish sausage?
[05:23] ---
    I don't mean fish...
[05:29] ---
    Oh look, there's a prick.
[05:31] ---
    How dare you! Why are you here?
[05:33] ---
    What's so weird about us walkin'
    around our neighborhood, baldie?
[05:36] ---
    Byakuya-chan! My dear friend!
[05:40] ---
    I missed you!
[05:41] ---
    Fck!
[05:43] ---
    Hibana wanted to make a dessert for Mimori
    Byakuya for Christmas so we came to buy ingredients.
[05:49] ---
    For Christmas?
[05:50] ---
    Fck!
[05:51] ---
    Can that rude little chick even make a proper cake?
[05:56] ---
    Don't be rude! What are you even here for anyway?
[06:00] ---
    We're on different levels, ya baldie.
[06:04] ---
    We didn't come to shop.
[06:06] ---
    We came for freebies! We're here for
    okra and bread crusts!
[06:10] ---
    Why do you have to sound so pompous
     when what you're doing is so shabby!
[06:14] ---
    Thank you, Hibana-chan.
[06:17] ---
    If you're okay with a sweetened
     bread crust, I'll make you some.
[06:22] ---
    Fck!
[06:24] ---
    Hibana, if you eat those free leftover bread crusts...
[06:27] ---
    you might end up with an upset stomach.
[06:30] ---
    What?! They're not leftovers...
[06:33] ---
    The baker is friendly with Byakuya
    and they give her the unsold stuff.
[06:38] ---
    That's what it means to be sympathetic,
     ya balding bastard.
[06:42] ---
    Sympathy?
[06:44] ---
    I don't believe making sweetened bread
    crust is worth Hibana's time, money, or effort.
[06:51] ---
    You're such a dumbass!
[06:53] ---
    You wouldn't know gourmet foods
     if it slapped you on the tongue.
[06:56] ---
    Byakuya's food tastes like love, bozo.
[07:01] ---
    You think her taste was influenced by
     the environment she was raised in?
[07:05] ---
    By that standard, Hibana was raised as
    an example of sophistication.
[07:10] ---
    Tea ceremony, flower arrangement, playing instruments...
[07:12] ---
    And her specialty is apple pie!
[07:14] ---
    Byakuya's lived alone since she left that facility.
[07:18] ---
    She only makes simple dishes...
[07:21] ---
    But you see her true charm when she's eating.
[07:27] ---
    Lick Lick, it's melting...
[07:30] ---
    Such vile behavior, knock it off!!
[07:33] ---
    You thought about it, didn't ya, pervy birdy~
[07:37] ---
    How dare you...!
[07:38] ---
    Food is...
[07:40] ---
    She spoke.
[07:41] ---
    She spoke...
[07:42] ---
    The most important ingredient for a meal comes...
[07:46] ---
    ...From the heart!
[07:48] ---
    From the heart?
[07:50] ---
    There's a sense of trust that goes into making
     and eating something for the first time.
[07:57] ---
    Everyone's experience of eating the same thing is different!
[08:01] ---
    You shouldn't be trying to test which is better!
[08:04] ---
    Cause that'd be just fcked up!
[08:10] ---
    Hibana...where did I go wrong?
[08:17] ---
    Fck, fck.
[08:21] ---
    From the heart...
[08:24] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant!
[08:27] ---
    I'm sorry to keep, ah--!
[08:33] ---
    Are you alright?
[08:36] ---
    Yes...
[08:37] ---
    The end-of-year balloon sale was nonstop...
[08:41] ---
    Did you come here on your break?
[08:43] ---
    I wanted to see you, even if it was only for a little while.
[08:48] ---
    You're too cute! Too stinkin' cute!!!
[08:51] ---
    Do you like bunnies?
[08:54] ---
    There's not much time, so I'll cut to the chase.
[08:57] ---
    I wanted to ask, what are you
    doing on the 24th and 25th?
[09:01] ---
    On Christmas?
[09:04] ---
    Oh yeah, that's Christmas, isn't it?
[09:06] ---
    Work.
[09:07] ---
    The pay on Christmas is good.
[09:10] ---
    I see...
[09:16] ---
    We could have cake...
[09:18] ---
    If I work hard, I'll have the evening off, and then...
[09:23] ---
    ...Would you be free?
[09:33] ---
    Well, I am a busy man.
[09:35] ---
    But seeing as how an old enemy
     is calling for me, I suppose it'll be alright.
[09:39] ---
    Is there something else?
[09:41] ---
    Uhm...
[09:43] ---
    Can I say something selfish?
[09:48] ---
    Go on. I won't think it's selfish though.
[09:54] ---
    Then, would you eat dinner with me?
[09:59] ---
    That's fine by me.
[10:01] ---
    To be honest, you don't have to ask so intently.
[10:04] ---
    We've had dinner plenty of times together already.
[10:07] ---
    I guess so...
[10:10] ---
    It's Christmas, though...
[10:13] ---
    Usually, I don't even think about it.
[10:17] ---
    But this year...
[10:21] ---
    I found myself wanting to spend my time with you.
[10:31] ---
    What exactly are you planning?!
[10:33] ---
    You want to spend Christmas night together? Which means...!
[10:38] ---
    No! You're supposed to be my enemy!
[10:41] ---
    Then just what is this?!
[10:43] ---
    My brain can't comprehend this at all!!
[10:45] ---
    Maybe it's too troublesome...
[10:49] ---
    No, not at all.
[10:53] ---
    Is there something you'd like to eat?
[10:55] ---
    I'll make it happen, whatever it is.
[10:58] ---
    Uhm, you can come to my place!
[11:01] ---
    We can eat dinner and spend time together.
[11:08] ---
    Okay. If that's what you want, that's what we'll do.
[11:11] ---
    Yes, I can't wait.
[11:16] ---
    How are you so cute!?
SIGN
SIGN    Episode 9



    On Christmas Night

Season 1

E9 - On Christmas Night

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] ---
    Merry Christmas.
[00:02] ---
    Thank you!
[00:04] ---
    -Now, sweetie… don't run!
    You’ll damage the cake!

[00:04] ---
    -Cake! Cake! Cake!
[00:07] ---
    -Thank you.
[00:15] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant.
[00:16] ---
    You’ll catch a cold dressed like that.
[00:20] ---
    No, don’t mind me.
[00:24] ---
    Thank you.
[00:26] ---
    Sorry, I think I’m going to be a little longer…
[00:29] ---
    Do you have to sell all the cakes?
[00:32] ---
    Whatever is left over will have to be bought out...
[00:35] ---
    Then, do you mind if I buy all of them?
[00:37] ---
    Huh? All of them…?
[00:40] ---
    Every single one!
SIGN    Lucky Christmas Shopping District
SIGN    The Big Christmas


    Lottery Event
[01:43] ---
    Thank you very much for buying so many...
[01:46] ---
    It was nothing. The evil organization
     will dispose of it in no time.
[01:51] ---
    Cake!!
[01:54] ---
    Can I make a stop nearby?
[01:56] ---
    Sure.
[02:01] ---
    We’re going shopping together…
[02:03] ---
    It’s like we’re…
[02:04] ---
    One of these, please.
[02:06] ---
    Here you go.
SIGN    Lucky Christmas Shopping District


    Lottery book
[02:09] ---
    What’s that paper?
[02:12] ---
    Ten of these vouchers will get me
     a chance at the lottery.
[02:16] ---
    [First Prize: Rice, 10 kg]
[02:18] ---
    Rice...
[02:19] ---
    Understood. I’ll get you a year’s
     worth of rice right now.
[02:23] ---
    Don’t…
[02:24] ---
    Don’t?!
[02:25] ---
    You always treat me so well.
[02:28] ---
    I want to get this on my own.
[02:31] ---
    Ten kilos... of rice!!
[02:37] ---
    You get tissues for participating!
[02:41] ---
    How many vouchers do I have to buy to get first prize?
[02:46] ---
    You can purchase items in exchange
     for vouchers in the shopping district…
[02:50] ---
    You're alright with just that?
[02:52] ---
    Yes.
[02:54] ---
    I can bring them with me anywhere.
[03:01] ---
    I see…
[03:05] ---
    I’m going to start prepping then.
[03:08] ---
    Feel free to sit where you like.
[03:11] ---
    An apron…
[03:13] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[03:14] ---
    Oh, uhm, let me lend a hand.
[03:18] ---
    Not that I have experience, but I’m interested in cooking…
[03:20] ---
    Thank you.
[03:22] ---
    Then, could you wash and peel this for me?
[03:26] ---
    Sure.
[03:29] ---
    What are you planning to make?
[03:31] ---
    Glazed carrots.
[03:32] ---
    You said you didn't mind eating sweet foods.
[03:37] ---
    I was going to make that with the
     hamburger steak I prepped last night.
[03:42] ---
    It's shaped...
[03:51] ---
    She made it a heart for me?!
[03:53] ---
    If it’s a heart then…?! No!!
[03:56] ---
    Girls send hearts in texts all the time,
     hearts mean absolutely nothing!
[04:00] ---
    It’s just a silly symbol… or is it…!?
[04:03] ---
    I've got no clue…!!
SIGN    There'll be
    nothing left
    of the carrot...
[04:05] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant, if you keep doing that...
[04:09] ---
    Half the steak is made of tofu,
    but I did put meat in there.
[04:13] ---
    Because I wanted to… elevate my cooking a bit today.
[04:16] ---
    I’ll send her Yonezawa beef again.
[04:19] ---
    It’s surprising, seeing you smiling.
[04:23] ---
    I was just thinking that it's strange...
[04:25] ---
    Going shopping for dinner ingredients,
    seeing you carry a shopping bag…
[04:31] ---
    And now we’re standing in a kitchen together.
[04:35] ---
    I agree… It is quite strange.
[04:43] ---
    We’re supposed to be enemies.
[04:46] ---
    And yet we’re spending time together in such peace…
[04:52] ---
    It really…truly is like we’re…!
[04:58] ---
    Newlyweds!!!
SIGN    Newlyweds
[05:03] ---
    Thank you for waiting.
[05:08] ---
    Is it a star…? Or is it a heart…?
[05:12] ---
    Heart…? Or star…?
[05:17] ---
    It’s a heart…!
[05:19] ---
    It might mean nothing,
     but it's possible she had some intent—
SIGN    BADUMP
SIGN    BADUMP
[05:23] ---
    Make sure to eat while it’s hot.
[05:27] ---
    Thanks for this meal.
[05:36] ---
    How is it?
[05:37] ---
    Outta this world...
[05:39] ---
    That good?
[05:48] ---
    The carrots we made together are also really good.
[06:00] ---
    Yeah…
[06:02] ---
    Thanks for the meal.
[06:05] ---
    Thank you for helping wash the dishes.
[06:08] ---
    It’s nothing…
    Rather, are you sure this was enough?
[06:12] ---
    Hm?
[06:13] ---
    I mean… it’s Christmas…
[06:16] ---
    Yes. I’m happy just getting to spend time with you.
[06:21] ---
    Is that…so…
[06:27] ---
    Isn’t there anything you want?
     I’d like to gift you some food.
[06:31] ---
    Huh?
[06:32] ---
    You don’t… you don’t have to go that far.
[06:35] ---
    I want to. I’d feel weird if I didn’t.
[06:42] ---
    Uhm... Then...
[06:46] ---
    If you can’t, then tell me...
[06:50] ---
    Okay, I will.
[06:52] ---
    Well…I’d…
[06:55] ---
    I’d like for you to call me “Byakuya.”
[07:03] ---
    Sorry...
[07:05] ---
    Tell me again...
[07:08] ---
    Call me by my name…
[07:14] ---
    What is she planning?!
[07:16] ---
    Was her strategy to target my will
     to fight and destroy all reasoning?!
[07:19] ---
    But why would she? That would
     only put herself in danger!
[07:23] ---
    Even with all my intellect, I can’t read her tactics!
[07:27] ---
    You’re a tough one, Magical Girl!
[07:30] ---
    At least I understand this much:
[07:32] ---
    You’re adorable!!!
[07:35] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[07:38] ---
    Uhm...
[07:39] ---
    At least for today, we don’t
    have to be enemies, right…?
[07:45] ---
    I…don’t want to be a magical girl today.
[07:50] ---
    I just want to be Byakuya.
[07:58] ---
    Yeah, I get it.
[08:03] ---
    Well, then...
[08:06] ---
    Miss...Byakuya...
[08:11] ---
    Yes, Mr. Lieutenant!
[08:15] ---
    It’s your turn.
[08:16] ---
    Huh?
[08:17] ---
    You said you didn’t want to be a magical girl today.
[08:21] ---
    Which means…I shouldn’t be an evil lieutenant.
[08:33] ---
    Hm…
[08:38] ---
    Mr... Mira…
[08:43] ---
    Miss Byakuya…
[08:45] ---
    Mr. Mira…
[08:46] ---
    Miss Byakuya…
[08:48] ---
    Mr. Mira...
[08:49] ---
    Miss Byakuya...
[08:50] ---
    Mr. Mira...
[08:52] ---
    Miss Byakuya...
[08:53] ---
    Mr. Mira...
[08:55] ---
    Miss Byakuya...
[08:56] ---
    What’s with this secret love affair, ha?!!
[08:59] ---
    Geez! It's givin' me the creeps!
[09:01] ---
    Mr. Familiar… When did you get back?
[09:05] ---
    I just got back. I even said I was back!
SIGN    1\frz11.06\pos(466.666667,103.333333)}Welcome back...*
[09:08] ---
    I caught you in your own little world with
     all your “Mr. Mira” and “Miss Byakuya”!
[09:14] ---
    It's pathetic!
[09:17] ---
    Did ya forget you're enemies?
[09:21] ---
    Byakuya, food!
[09:23] ---
    O-okay, did you want a hamburger steak?
[09:23] ---
    That was close…
[09:25] ---
    True, we did put our relations aside for the moment.
[09:26] ---
    Yeah, sure.
[09:29] ---
    Even if it is Christmas,
     I need to protect my reputation…
[09:35] ---
    It's not a heart!
[09:37] ---
    Merry Christmas!!
[09:39] ---
    Fck!!
[09:41] ---
    Byakuya-chan, I baked an apple pie for you!
[09:45] ---
    Fck!
[09:46] ---
    Oh, I'm so glad.
[09:48] ---
    Merry Crushmas…
[09:51] ---
    Merry Christmas!
[09:54] ---
    Did you decide what you’ll ask Santa for, Spica?
[09:57] ---
    Stop treating me like a child!
[09:59] ---
    You’re acting so cutesy, I couldn’t help it.
[10:02] ---
    C-Cutesy?
[10:04] ---
    Of course, Mira would provide refreshments.
[10:07] ---
    He’s thoughtful like that.
[10:10] ---
    Hmph. You call this an evil organization?
[10:13] ---
    Merry Christmas!
[10:16] ---
    What is this hat!?
[10:19] ---
    It’s something humans do on Christmas!
[10:26] ---
    My Byakuya…
[10:29] ---
    My Hibana…
[10:38] ---
    Thank you for today.
[11:03] ---
    Merry Christmas...
[11:09] ---
    Miss Byakuya.
[11:14] ---
    Yes! Merry Christmas, Mr. Mira.
SIGN    Episode 9



    On Christmas Night
SIGN
SIGN    Episode 10



    A Day with Mr. Familiar

Season 1

E10 - A Day with Mr. Familiar

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] ---
    On the days I'm with Mr. Familiar,
     I make our breakfast in the morning.
[00:12] ---
    Then I go wake him up.
[00:16] ---
    Mr. Familiar, it’s morn--ing!
[00:19] ---
    Let’s sleep a little more...
[00:21] ---
    Intimately, I mean.
[00:23] ---
    And then I get sexually harassed.
[01:27] ---
    Byakuya!
[01:29] ---
    We need to have a strategy meeting.
[01:31] ---
    But I have a lot of cleaning to do…
[01:33] ---
    Cleaning or the world crisis,
    which is more important?
[01:37] ---
    After breakfast, sometimes, we'll have
     a meeting if he feels like it.
[01:42] ---

[01:44] ---
    What're we discussing…?
[01:45] ---
    We gotta refine your tactics so they’re magical girl-like.
[01:49] ---
    What in particular needs to be more magical girl-like?
[01:53] ---
    Don’t talk back, else I'm gonna grab your titties.
[01:56] ---
    We should come up with a
    magical girl-like entrance catchphrase.
[02:00] ---
    I’m gonna teach ya, so watch.
[02:03] ---
    Happy Happy Happiness!
[02:07] ---
    With my un-happy power,
    I will happily cast you into hapless oblivion!
[02:13] ---
    What?! Super catchy, innit?
[02:15] ---
    Do I really have to do it?
[02:18] ---
    Huh?!
[02:19] ---
    Okay…
[02:21] ---
    Happy Happy Happiness!
[02:24] ---
    With my un-happy power,
    I will happily cast you into hapless oblivion!
[02:34] ---
    That’s what I love about ya!
[02:36] ---
    Even if ya don’t wanna do it, ya give it your all!
[02:39] ---
    It’s my job…
[02:41] ---
    Haa, I lol'd.
[02:44] ---
    Ya gotta do it for your next entrance.
[02:46] ---
    Okay. If it’s for my job, then I will…
[02:49] ---
    Next up, we have this!
[02:51] [SONG] ---
    °Image is work
     in progress.
[02:51] [SONG] ---
    Glass Happiness
    2nd Design
[02:53] ---
    As a magical girl, we’ll be makin' minor changes to your uniform.
[02:56] ---
    There’ll be more pieces.
[02:59] ---
    I don’t see any difference though…?
[03:01] ---
    Design number 3.
[03:03] ---
    Are there more pieces?
[03:05] ---
    Design number 4.
[03:07] ---
    Isn’t that less…?
[03:09] ---
    Design number 5.
[03:11] ---
    Now there are no pieces!
[03:13] ---
    You idiot! It'll be a game changer!
[03:16] ---
    Who the hell said there's gotta be
    more outfit for an outfit change?!
[03:21] ---
    You said there would be more pieces, though…
[03:24] ---
    Fine, then what kinda outfit did ya want?
[03:27] ---
    Maybe, a little more fabric, if possible…
[03:30] ---
    Immediately no.
[03:31] ---
    The only things ya got going for ya are
    your face, your tits, and your obedience.
SIGN    Don't be
    stingy, bring
    'em out!
[03:37] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…!
[03:38] ---
    Don’t go running to your enemy for safety!
[03:41] ---
    You never learn…
[03:45] ---
    Listen up, I got a word of advice for ya...
[03:49] ---
    That evil lieutenant…
[03:53] ---
    He’s a boob guy!
[03:56] ---
    By the afternoon...
[03:57] ---
    Yeah, that four-eyes is a total perv.
SIGN    Peak
     Pimp
[03:59] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant isn’t like that.
[03:59] ---
    ...The strategy meetings usually veer off at the end.
[04:02] ---
    A dummy like you wouldn’t get it.
[04:06] ---
    We’ll now start our special emergency
     meeting. If you would, Mira.
[04:11] ---
    Yes. Our topic…
[04:14] ---
    The Evil Organization's 17th Annual End-of-Year Party.
[04:18] ---
    Oh no!
[04:19] ---
    I didn’t think we were going to do it this year!
[04:22] ---
    At this rate, it would have been better
     if it was left undecided…
[04:26] ---
    Why fight it...
[04:27] ---
    Even if we started preparing, we won’t be ready in time.
[04:30] ---
    No, we’ll finish in time.
[04:33] ---
    Because…
[04:34] ---
    The King is looking forward to it!
[04:37] ---
    That's right... it's only an
     “End-of-Year Party” in name only...
[04:40] ---
    It’s more like an unholy feast,
    because it's a party for the King of Evil,
[04:44] ---
    by the King of Evil, and all for his entertainment.
[04:48] ---
    We’ll be at the King’s beck and call until he’s satisfied...
[04:52] ---
    ...Acting as his court jesters until every last drop
     of our strength and pride is wrung dry…!
[04:59] ---
    So be it.
[05:01] ---
    We are the King of Evil’s seven henchmen.
[05:04] ---
    It’s only acceptable if we make all his wishes come true.
[05:07] ---
    You talk a big game, but you'll
     be in the trenches, too, right?
[05:10] ---
    I'm the event organizer.
[05:11] ---
    So I have other work to attend to.
[05:13] ---
    This man is such a genius!
[05:16] ---
    Just thinking of such affairs makes my stomach hurt…
[05:21] ---
    Hang in there, Sadalsuud!
[05:23] ---
    Should I take you to the medical room?!
[05:25] ---
    I’ll be alright as long as you keep quiet.
[05:29] ---
    Understood!!
[05:30] ---
    So? What’s the plan?
[05:32] ---
    We don’t have much time so we have to focus on something.
[05:35] ---
    Not to worry.
[05:37] ---
    I already have a plan in mind.
[05:40] ---
    This year…
[05:42] ---
    We’ll do the same as last year:
    “The No Laughing Evil Organization!!!”
[05:47] ---
    Sadalsuud… you’re out.
[05:51] ---
    Stop! Don’t come near me!
[05:53] ---
    I refuse…!
[05:54] ---
    I don't want to have that nightmare again!
[05:57] ---
    Same!
[05:58] ---
    Don't you think you judged us too harshly?
[06:01] ---
    I don't think I laughed that much.
[06:04] ---
    Well, it'd be boring if the odds
    weren't evened up a bit, wouldn't it?
[06:09] ---
    Some judge you are!
SIGN    kill
[06:11] ---
    Well, I had a great time!
[06:13] ---
    That’s cause you were an instigator!
[06:16] ---
    If that’s what we’re doing then
     I’m gonna try and become one.
[06:19] ---
    Right, Bellatrix?
[06:21] ---
    Say something if you wanna do it!
[06:24] ---
    I will… follow whatever Mira commands this year.
[06:29] ---
    What?!
[06:29] ---
    Why?!
[06:30] ---
    I believe that Mira is the one most
    capable of completing this task.
[06:35] ---
    Thank you for your level-headed opinion, Bellatrix.
[06:40] ---
    Yeah. If we have the same roles every year,
    the King will get bored, won't he?
[06:45] ---
    We should have Mira participate this year! It’ll be fun!
[06:49] ---
    Fomalhaut.
[06:50] ---
    Hm?
[06:53] ---
    Go fetch!
[06:53] ---
    Woof!
[06:56] ---
    B-But, Bella, didn't you get a good wallop last year?
[07:01] ---
    You hated that, didn't you?
[07:05] ---
    Last year?
[07:05] ---
    Yes!
[07:07] ---
    I remember last year's like it was yesterday...
[07:10] ---
    An obscene, vexing, and arousing time...
[07:15] ---
    I vaguely recall being surrounded by people in black...
[07:19] ---
    My hands and legs bound, my freedom
     stripped, and my butt spanked!
[07:24] ---
    And behind it all...
[07:27] ---
    Mira had been the one issuing the orders...!
[07:31] ---
    You fiend! You four-eyed fiend! You sadist!
[07:34] ---
    What spurred this on?
[07:36] ---
    Anyway! I propose that we all change positions from last year!
[07:41] ---
    No.
[07:41] ---
    What?!
[07:43] ---
    Are you for or against it?
[07:45] ---
    Maybe it's her guilty pleasure?
[07:47] ---
    I have to catch a bus soon.
[07:50] ---
    If that isn't good enough, does anyone have any other ideas?
[07:52] ---
    I'll give it some thought if someone has something prepared.
[07:56] ---
    I do.
[07:57] ---
    Betelgeuse has an idea...?!
[07:59] ---
    Go ahead, Betelgeuse.
[08:05] ---
    Slippery Sumo.
[08:10] ---
    Alright, I'm heading out.
[08:26] ---
    I work until evening...
[08:29] ---
    While Mr. Familiar relaxes comfortably.
[08:33] ---
    I'll go shopping for dinner ingredients on my way home.
[08:36] ---
    And Mr. Familiar relaxes comfortably.
[08:41] ---
    I'm home.
[08:52] ---
    Today, I'm doing a big tidy of the house before dinner.
[09:08] ---
    You done yet?
[09:10] ---
    Y-yes.
[09:11] ---
    Then let's go.
[09:15] ---
    We usually have baths in a metal basin at home,
    but sometimes we'll go to a bath house.
[09:27] ---
    Daddy!
[09:29] ---
    Thanks for waiting!
[09:31] ---
    You get all warmed up?
[09:33] ---
    Yeah!
[09:33] ---
    Bathing in a big tub is nice, isn't it?
[09:35] ---
    Yeah! I wanna come back! Tomorrow!
[09:38] ---
    Tomorrow~?
[09:40] ---
    It's hot~
[09:47] ---
    It was pretty crowded in there.
[09:50] ---
    It's the end of the year, that's why.
[10:01] ---
    I'll make some soba when we get back.
[10:04] ---
    Soba with meat?
[10:05] ---
    Just soba...
[10:11] ---
    Thank you for the food.
[10:14] ---
    You know...
[10:18] ---
    Here ya are livin' with a guy like it's no big deal.
    But what do ya think? About me, I mean.
[10:25] ---
    Well...
[10:27] ---
    You're a messenger from heaven, usually in your cat form.
[10:30] ---
    And you aid magical girls.
[10:32] ---
    I didn't ask for exposition.
[10:35] ---
    It's a little foreign to me, so I don't really understand, but...
[10:39] ---
    ...This feels like what a family would be like.
[10:44] ---
    Byakuya...
[10:46] ---
    It ain't like that.
    And the soup's watery.
[10:49] ---
    I didn't have enough soy sauce.
[10:52] ---
    As an angel, Mr. Familiar can survive without eating.
[11:06] ---
    It's really good.
[11:08] ---
    Huh? Food this plain?
[11:12] ---
    Happy New Year.
[11:15] ---**
    Ah, yeah.
SIGN    Episode 10



    A Day with Mr. Familiar
SIGN    Episode 11



    53-Year Old Building
SIGN

Season 1

E11 - 53-Year Old Building

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Episode 11



    53-Year Old Building
[01:30] ---
    So Mira…
[01:32] ---
    You’re pretty infatuated with that magical girl, aren’t you?
[01:36] ---
    Don't be ridiculous…
[01:37] ---
    Well well!
[01:39] ---
    I found this personality test…
    I wonder how you answered?
[01:42] ---
    It's like they say, "To err is human."
[01:45] ---
    Even the smartest ones can slip up sometimes, don’t you think?
[01:51] ---
    The first four-letter word that came to your
     mind was LIFE. The second was LOVE.
[01:56] ---
    Which could mean…
[01:57] ---
    In Mira's perfect LIFE, it's just in LOVE that he's slipped up?
[02:03] ---
    I think so!
[02:05] ---
    You sure are a lively bunch.
[02:07] ---
    My, you have perfect timing.
[02:09] ---
    Hm?
[02:12] ---
    You're riding in a spaceship. After some
    trouble, you crash land on a planet.
[02:20] ---
    What would you say?
[02:22] ---
    I would think "I thought that was the end for me”,
    having barely escaped death…
[02:29] ---
    What do you think, Mira?
[02:31] ---
    You want me to answer?
[02:32] ---
    Well yeah!
[02:34] ---
    I would have to think rationally about what to do.
[02:37] ---
    Maybe, “Where do we go from here”…?
[02:40] ---
    That's a good one! What about you, Alcyone?
[02:43] ---
    Well… if I were in that situation,
     I’d want to be with Spica.
[02:46] ---
    What?!
[02:48] ---
    So? What’s the answer, then?
[02:50] ---
    I-I-I-I don't have an answer!
    You didn't even give a real answer!
[02:54] ---
    Just kidding!
[02:57] ---
    Actually, I already know.
[02:58] ---
    I just wanted to see your reaction after~
[03:02] ---
    After…
[03:04] ---
    Which would mean…
[03:06] ---
    Is that... the end for me...!?
[03:09] ---
    So...where do we go from here?
[03:12] ---
    From here...will it be so intense I'll die?!
SIGN    Go easy
     on me...
SIGN    The night
     is young...
[03:16] ---
    No!! That’s so obscene!!
[03:18] ---
    You four-eyed stud!
[03:19] ---
    What on earth is happening?
[03:24] ---
    What a ridiculous conversation…
[03:27] ---
    Emergency landing a spaceship?
[03:29] ---
    Speaking plainly, I don't care to leave my research lab.
[03:33] ---
    So that situation would never apply to me.
[03:35] ---
    Don't you feel a sense adventure
     in going to space, Sadalsuud?
[03:39] ---
    Huh?!
[03:40] ---
    If it were me…
[03:41] ---
    I'd say "A lot happened but it was a great experience,"
[03:44] ---
    "And I will remember this day for the rest of my life!"
[03:47] ---
    He really thinks he's cool…
[03:50] ---
    Thanks to all that, I’m late…
[03:55] ---
    She’s not here yet…
[04:09] ---
    Let’s play on the slide!
[04:10] ---
    Okay!
[04:14] ---
    Bye!
[04:16] ---
    Bye!
[04:28] ---
    She never came today.
[04:34] ---
    It’s not like we planned to meet every day, but…
[04:39] ---
    Perhaps she was working on a strategy behind closed doors.
[04:42] ---
    If so, then I have an obligation to investigate it.
[04:48] ---
    What are you doing out here?
[04:52] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[04:57] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant!!
[05:01] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant! Mr. Lieutenant!!
[05:04] ---
    What is this, a new strategy?
[05:07] ---
    So cute.
[05:08] ---
    My brain can’t keep up with this.
[05:10] ---
    She’s so cute.
[05:11] ---
    The only thing I can even comprehend is that...
[05:13] ---
    She’s so cute!
[05:14] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant.
[05:16] ---
    I missed you. I’m so glad you’re here.
[05:20] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant!!
SIGN    The magical girl is burying her face in me
[05:22] ---
    No, my brain and reasoning have taken a critical hit!
SIGN    Critical hit! The Evil Lieutentant's brain
    and reasoning have taken damage
SIGN    Evil Lieutenant
SIGN    Count prime
     numbers
SIGN    Take a
    deep breath
[05:26] ---
    Just take a deep breath for now…!
SIGN    The Evil Lieutenant took a deep breath
[05:32] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[05:35] ---
    You’re shaking. Did something happen?
[05:37] ---
    Was it the cat again?
[05:40] ---
    Mr. Familiar isn’t here right now…
[05:43] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant… please…
[05:49] ---
    Don’t leave me tonight…
[05:54] ---
    Please… I want to be with you…
[06:02] ---
    You do realize what you’re asking, right?
[06:05] ---
    Yes, Mr. Lieutenant...
[06:09] ---
    So, are you ready to throw everything away?
[06:15] ---
    You’d give up your mission and
     the world you grew up in… to be with me…?
[06:23] ---
    Yes…
[06:25] ---
    Affordable housing is rare, but it's
     not worth it when I'm scared of ghosts!
[06:31] ---
    Huh?
[06:33] ---
    A haunted apartment?
[06:38] ---
    Well, when you look around...
    It does give off that vibe…
[06:43] ---
    Think it will come out?
[06:45] ---
    Yes…
[06:46] ---
    I tried to ignore it cause it hasn’t
    caused me any direct harm, but…
[06:51] ---
    That’s impressive…
[06:53] ---
    Lately, all throughout the night,
    it’s like it wants me to give it something…
SIGN    Give it back...
    Give it back...
SIGN    I don't have
    anything though...
[06:58] ---
    Because of that, I haven’t been able to sleep well…
[07:02] ---
    Why not move?
[07:03] ---
    Rent is only 9,000 yen, so I’ve been putting up with it.
[07:08] ---
    That rent is all the more scary…
[07:11] ---
    I can’t let her stay here.
[07:14] ---
    She should be living somewhere
     cheap, but well-lit and warm.
[07:19] ---
    Welcome back, Mr. Mira.
[07:21] ---
    Would you like a bath? Or dinner?
[07:25] ---
    Or would you like…
[07:26] ---
    Me?
[07:29] ---
    No, stop… I would be only too happy about that...
[07:35] ---
    At present, you’re stuck but there’s a lack of danger.
[07:39] ---
    I’m surprised you live here like you do.
[07:42] ---
    I never believed in ghosts before.
     But then...
[07:48] ---
    Well, what about me, you, and that lieutenant?
[07:51] ---
    We’re all supernatural beings, too, right?
[07:55] ---
    I realized that once I couldn’t deny
     that about you, things got more scary.
[08:03] ---
    What's scary is how cute you are!
[08:06] ---
    More scary than Inagawa ji’s summer stories!
[08:09] ---
    Is the cat coming back tonight?
[08:12] ---
    He said he wouldn’t be back for a while…
[08:15] ---
    So tonight it’ll just be the two of us… Ah…
[08:20] ---
    This doesn't mean anything.
[08:22] ---
    We’re enemies, so there's no room for error here....
[08:26] ---
    ...And the magical girl is showing her weakness!
[08:31] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant!!
[08:33] ---
    M-Mr. Lieutenant…
[08:35] ---
    I hear something rattling…
SIGN    soft~
[08:37] ---
    I hear it too. But it might be the sound of my pride or
    whatever you call it getting rattled instead…
[08:43] ---
    There’s nothing to be done. Let’s just go to sleep.
[08:46] ---
    Let’s regroup in the morning when things are calm.
SIGN    Got to
     get a
     hold of
     myself
[08:50] ---
    Okay...
[08:52] ---
    I’m turning the lights off.
[09:17] ---
    How can I sleep like this...
[09:21] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant.
[09:23] ---
    Thank you so much…
[09:27] ---
    For listening to my selfish request…
[09:30] ---
    And that time before...
[09:33] ---
    ...When you said all of those things.
[09:37] ---
    Haven’t…you spoiled me enough…?
[09:44] ---
    What are you saying?
[09:46] ---
    Conversely, you should've told me
     before you sat outside scared…
[09:51] ---
    No matter what happens to you, I will…
[10:03] ---
    What did I want to say…?
[10:08] ---
    No…
[10:14] ---
    It’s more like, “I will be the one to defeat you.”
[10:19] ---
    That’s what I mean…
[10:26] ---
    Mr. Familiar was able to purge
    the apartment with his sacred powers.
[10:32] ---
    If you could do that, why didn't you do it sooner?
[10:34] ---
    Because I wanted us to move to
     a place with a real bathtub…
[10:38] ---
    My 9,000 yen rent, yay!
[11:49] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[11:54] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…
[11:57] ---
    She’s just…talking in her sleep…
[12:00] ---
    Wait, sleep talking?!
[12:01] ---
    Does that mean she dreams of me?!
[12:05] ---
    ‘Shank you, Mr. Lieutenann…
[12:09] ---
    No, thank you!
[12:11] ---
    She can see me in her dreams!!
    Ahhh! Just how freakin' lonely am I!
[12:17] ---*
    I love you…
SIGN    Final Episode
SIGN

Season 1

E12 - Side B / Side M

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:07] ---
    Being a magical girl...
[00:11] ---
    and saving the world is something…
    of a dream job.
[00:18] ---
    And I just happen to be a magical girl.
[00:18] ---
    Happy Happy Happiness!
[00:21] ---
    With my happy power, I'll happily send you to heaven!
[00:23] ---
    Draft beer, please!
[00:24] ---
    Yes, coming right up!
[00:26] ---
    I’m called Glass Happiness,
    a magical girl with the power of misfortune.
[00:31] ---
    Here you are…!
[00:33] ---
    You’re really cute. Why not come work for me?
[00:36] ---
    Uhm, sure?
[00:38] ---
    No~!
[00:40] ---
    Whenever I meet Mr. Lieutenant at the park,
    he’s always the first to see me.
[00:47] ---
    Today, however…I don’t think he’s
    noticed me this close to him.
[00:48] ---
    --Alright! Here we go!
[00:52] ---
    It’s unusual…
[00:54] ---
    I wonder what kind of face he’ll make when I surprise him.
[00:59] ---
    I wanna see it…
SIGN    Excited...
[01:00] ---
    I’ll sneak up and cover his eyes…
[01:03] ---
    Guess who…! Ah…
SIGN    Not tall
     enough
[01:09] ---
    …It’s you.
[01:10] ---
    Yeah… it’s me…
SIGN    Dejected
[01:13] ---
    I wasn’t able to see his face in surprise.
[01:18] ---
    I forgot! There was actually a
    catchphrase I was supposed to say…
[01:23] ---
    A catchphrase?
[01:25] ---
    You have to say it.
[01:27] ---
    Okay...
[01:28] ---
    Time got away from us today so I’ll do it tomorrow.
[01:32] ---
    No.
[01:34] ---
    You should do it right now.
[01:35] ---
    Huh...?
[01:37] ---
    It’s embarrassing but it’s part of the job.
[01:41] ---
    Uhm, here goes…
[01:44] ---
    Go ahead.
[01:45] ---
    Happy Happy Happiness!
[01:48] ---
    With my un-happy power,
     I will happily cast you into hapless oblivion!
[01:59] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant?
[02:03] ---
    Saying something so silly with a straight face!
    You sure take your work seriously, huh?
[02:07] ---
    I bet that cat came up with that one...
[02:12] ---
    You know, you really should tell him off more.
[02:19] ---
    I didn’t know seeing Mr. Lieutenant’s smile
     could make me feel so happy…
[02:24] ---
    That was embarrassing for me,
    but seeing his smile was worth it.
[02:28] ---
    I’ll try harder next time!
[02:31] ---
    That was fun. Now…
[02:34] ---
    Do it again.
[02:37] ---
    I did it three more times.
[02:40] ---
    No more please…
[02:42] ---
    It’s for research.
[02:44] ---
    You’re such a meanie sometimes…
[02:47] ---
    You only noticed now? I’m the ruthless
     Evil Lieutenant, remember?
[02:52] ---
    That can’t be.
[02:53] ---
    You’re really so kind even when you tease me a bunch…
[03:02] ---
    By the way, can you use magic as a magical girl?
[03:07] ---
    Yes, just a little bit…
[03:09] ---
    Today, I'll teach you how to turn
    misfortune into happiness...
[03:14] ---
    through “Happiness Conversion."
[03:17] ---
    Okay. That sounds like wonderful magic.
[03:20] ---
    But first, you need to experience
    some misfortune yourself. Mmbyee~!
[03:24] ---
    Huh?
[03:26] ---
    Oh my… You're a cutie.
[03:32] ---
    I gave it my all…
[03:33] ---
    Is that so?
SIGN    Training?
[03:34] ---
    After that, I gave Mr. Lieutenant
    a little demonstration of my magic.
[03:40] ---
    Okay, so, I need you to do something
     that makes me unhappy.
[03:44] ---
    How so?
[03:46] ---
    Well…
SIGN
SIGN    [Doesn't
     hurt]
SIGN
SIGN    [Stopped
    halfway]
[03:53] ---
    …Let’s stop.
[03:56] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant really is...
[04:00] ---
    ...A kind person…
[04:11] ---
    The Evil Lieutenant.
[04:14] ---
     He's considered the brains of the Evil Organization, and known far and wide for his cold-heartedness.
[04:22] ---
    However, not many know his true nature.
[04:27] ---
    You can choose whichever character you want.
[04:30] ---
    The sheep…
[04:32] ---
    Alright then.
[04:33] ---
    It looks a little like her.
[04:36] ---
    I’m always the one calling
    out to her when we meet in the park.
[04:41] ---
    As such, this time I'll try
    pretending not to notice her.
[04:42] ---
    --Alright! Here we go!
[04:46] ---
    But this by no means implies that I'm
    desperate for her to notice me more or anything!
[04:52] ---
    I sense her getting closer.
[04:55] ---
    Is she trying to slowly get close to me so she can
     surprise me? Is she going to cover my eyes?
[04:59] ---
    I sense her reaching up…
    She’s gonna cover my eyes…!
[05:02] ---
    Guess who…? Ah…
SIGN    Not tall
    enough
[05:05] ---
    She can’t reach…!?
[05:07] ---
    The award for being cutest and cleverest should go to her!
[05:10] ---
    …It’s you.
[05:13] ---
    I forgot! There was actually a
    catchphrase I was supposed to say…
[05:19] ---
    A catchphrase?
[05:20] ---
    It’s necessary for a magical girl’s entrance, apparently.
[05:23] ---
    I'm not certain it’s a necessity, but it could
     be a highlight of what she can do…
[05:26] ---
    Time got away from us today so I’ll do it tomorrow.
[05:29] ---
    A highlight…
[05:30] ---
    No, you should do it right now.
[05:32] ---
    Huh?
[05:33] ---
    Come now, Magical Girl!
    I’m your enemy, and I stand in your way!
[05:38] ---
    I need to see it! Plain and simple!
[05:41] ---
    Uhm, here goes…
[05:43] ---
    Go ahead.
[05:45] ---
    Happy Happy Happiness!
[05:48] ---
    With my un-happy power,
     I will happily cast you into hapless oblivion!
[05:55] ---
    I’m sorry, that's just the cutest but most pathetic
     thing ever! Incredible! I want to make her happy…!
[06:00] ---
    Phew, that was fun.
[06:03] ---
    I obtained another piece of data on magical girls.
[06:07] ---
    I’m not sure how useful it’ll be, though.
[06:10] ---
    Even so, I can't afford
     to overlook even the tiniest detail.
[06:13] ---
    As such...
[06:15] ---
    Now… Do it again.
[06:17] ---
    Ha… Happi…
[06:19] ---
    Hm? What’s wrong? I can't hear you.
[06:24] ---
    I had her do it three more times.
[06:27] ---
    You’re such a meanie sometimes…
[06:30] ---
    You only noticed now? I’m the ruthless
     Evil Lieutenant, remember?
[06:34] ---
    That can’t be.
[06:36] ---
    You’re really so kind even when you tease me a bunch…
[06:41] ---
    I want to make her do more embarrassing thingsssss…!
[06:46] ---
    This is just part of my research,
    but what kind of magic can you do?
[06:51] ---
    Well... There's “Happiness Happiness”.
[06:55] ---
    If I use that, nothing but good things will happen.
[06:58] ---
    Wouldn't that make you invincible?
[07:00] ---
    But it only lasts nine seconds.
[07:02] ---
    Oh...
[07:04] ---
    And I can use “Happiness Conversion,"
     where I can turn misfortune into happiness…
[07:09] ---
    Oh…
[07:11] ---
    Happiness Conversion!
[07:16] ---
    Okay, so, I need you to make me unhappy.
[07:20] ---
    How so?
[07:21] ---
    Well…
[07:23] ---
    You can try hitting me?
[07:25] ---
    I can’t do that.
[07:27] ---
    You can’t?
[07:28] ---
    It would be outside my specialty.
[07:32] ---
    How about lightly pinching me?
[07:37] ---
    Don’t mind me…
[07:41] ---
    So soft… Her cheeks are like marshmallows.
[07:46] ---
    They're white and puffy…
[07:49] ---
    Ah, uhm…
[07:51] ---
    I don't think that's really working…
[07:56] ---
    Go…go ahead.
[07:59] ---
    Excuse me…
[08:03] ---
    It’s like her magic is awakening something in me.
[08:09] ---
    Let’s stop…
[08:11] ---
    Before it’s too late.
[08:15] ---
    I’m sorry I couldn’t show you any magic…
[08:18] ---
    How careless of you, apologizing for not
     showing your enemy your skills.
[08:24] ---
    It’s hard for me to show you my magic…
[08:30] ---
    I like being touched by your big hands…
     so it’s hard for me to be unhappy.
[08:37] ---
    What you’re saying is so good and so bad!
[08:39] ---
    There’s no room for misunderstandings here!
[08:41] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant? What’s wrong?
[08:46] ---
    I wish I could've done it for him...
[08:55] ---
    I’ll see you tomorrow, Mr. Lieutenant.
[09:00] ---
    Mhm.
[09:04] ---
    Sweet treats. Mr. Lieutenant’s smile.
    Mr. Lieutenant’s hands.
[09:10] ---
    Seriously...
[09:13] ---
    You’ve had me losing my mind ever since we met.
[09:19] ---
    Even though I'm a cold-hearted evil lieutenant.
[09:23] ---
    Even though I'm the magical girl of misfortune.
[09:27] ---
    We'll say “See you tomorrow” again today as we part.
[09:31] ---
    I feel all the happiness in the world
     when I’m with Mr. Lieutenant.
[09:38] ---
    Good night, Magical Girl…
[09:49] ---
    Good night, Mr. Lieutenant.
[09:54] ---
    The days we have...
[09:57] ---
    I'm helpless against...
[09:59] ---
    The happiness that I feel.
[11:05] ---
    I’m heading out.
[11:24] ---
    Hibana, what’s this dessert?
SIGN    To my dear familiar
[11:28] ---
    Hibanaaaa!
[11:30] ---
    F*ck!
[11:35] ---
    Being outspoken and passionate would do more harm than good!
[11:37] ---
    Is that so?!
[11:39] ---
    The personality test again?
[11:41] ---
    He likes them too.
[11:49] ---
    Me? I'm a continent of passion!
[11:54] ---
    Has anyone seen Mira?
[11:55] ---
    Mira is on a mission.
[12:08] ---
    All set.
[12:10] ---
    Mr. Lieutenant…!
[12:22] ---
    Sorry for the wait!
[12:24] ---

The Magical Girl and the Evil Lieutenant Used to Be Archenemies

Season 1

E1 - Won't Kill For Love

E2 - The (taking down of the) magical girl belongs to (no one but) me

E3 - Now Back to the Drawing Board

E4 - A Habit of Chasing What Moves

E5 - We're Enemies

E6 - What Magical Girls Are

E7 - They're Friends...?

E8 - Before Christmas

E9 - On Christmas Night

E10 - A Day with Mr. Familiar

E11 - 53-Year Old Building

E12 - Side B / Side M