# Season 1
# E1 - Karen Bee, Part One
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6P8PD8Q6/karen-bee-part-1)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:09] Araragi**
I apologize for this jarring and
unexpected development,
**[00:13] Araragi**
but it appears I have been kidnapped.
**[00:16] Araragi**
This happened ten days into
summer vacation, on July 29th.
**[00:24] Araragi**
No, it's possible that it's already the 30th.
**[00:39] Senjougahara**
Oh, you're awake, Araragi-kun.
**[00:42] Senjougahara**
I'm glad.
**[00:44] Senjougahara**
I was worried you might have died.
**[00:51] Senjougahara**
Are you all right?
**[00:52] Senjougahara**
Does the back of your head hurt?
**[00:53] Araragi**
Senjougahara,
**[00:54] Araragi**
remove these handcuffs.
**[00:55] Senjougahara**
No.
**[00:58] Araragi**
I knew it! You did this!
**[01:00] Senjougahara**
I see...
**[01:01] Senjougahara**
Interesting theory,
**[01:03] Senjougahara**
assuming you have proof.
**[01:05] Araragi**
I guessed the minute I saw you chose
to confine me at this cram school.
**[01:09] Araragi**
Now take off the handcuffs!
**[01:10] Senjougahara**
No.
**[01:12] Senjougahara**
No.
**[01:13] Senjougahara**
Also, I can't.
I've thrown away the key.
**[01:15] Araragi**
Seriously?
**[01:17] Senjougahara**
I also threw away the antidote.
**[01:18] Araragi**
You poisoned me, too?!
**[01:21] Senjougahara**
That was a lie.
**[01:23] Senjougahara**
Though it might come true
if you don't do as I say.
**[01:27] Senjougahara**
Float like a butterfly,
sting like a butterfly!
**[01:30] Araragi**
Butterflies don't sting!
**[01:32] Senjougahara**
I said it wrong.
**[01:34] Senjougahara**
Good for you, to be able
to point out my mistake.
**[01:36] Senjougahara**
Take pride in this moment forever.
**[01:38] Araragi**
What's this new, avant-garde method
of admitting your mistakes?
**[01:40] Senjougahara**
The correct word was "bee."
**[01:42] Araragi**
Bee poison is strong, isn't it?
**[01:45] Senjougahara**
Don't worry.
**[01:46] Senjougahara**
Araragi-kun,
**[01:47] Senjougahara**
I'll protect you.
**[01:50] Senjougahara**
You won't die.
**[01:52] Senjougahara**
Because I'll protect you.
**[01:53] Araragi**
I'd prefer to enjoy this conversation
**[01:56] Araragi**
with no unnecessary Evangelion references.
**[01:58] Araragi**
And, um, Gahara-san?
**[02:01] Araragi**
I'm hungry...
**[02:03] Araragi**
And kinda thirsty.
**[02:05] Araragi**
Want to get something to eat?
**[02:08] Senjougahara**
I expected a wormlike fool like
yourself might say that,
**[02:11] Senjougahara**
so I brought several items with me.
**[02:13] Araragi**
Did you?
**[02:15] Araragi**
Then give me something to drink.
**[02:26] Senjougahara**
You want something to drink?
**[02:27] Araragi**
Well, I guess...
**[02:30] Senjougahara**
But I'm going to drink it.
**[02:38] Senjougahara**
It's good.
**[02:41] Senjougahara**
What's with that look of longing?
**[02:43] Senjougahara**
No one said they were giving it to you.
**[02:47] Senjougahara**
Or did you think I'd feed it
to you, mouth-to-mouth?
**[02:50] Senjougahara**
My, Araragi-kun...
**[02:51] Senjougahara**
You're so naughty.
**[02:53] Araragi**
In this situation, only Kanbaru
would come up with that!
**[02:56] Senjougahara**
Yeah?
**[02:57] Senjougahara**
But what about when I
made out with you?
**[03:00] Araragi**
Don't bring that up, in this setting!
**[03:04] Senjougahara**
All right, then.
**[03:05] Senjougahara**
If you absolutely must
drink it, I'll let you.
**[03:08] Araragi**
I absolutely must drink it.
**[03:10] Senjougahara**
Has this man no pride?
**[03:13] Senjougahara**
To say something so humiliating,
from a simple desire for water.
**[03:17] Senjougahara**
Wouldn't it be better for you,
if you died?
**[03:20] Araragi**
*She really seems to be enjoying this.*
**[03:21] Senjougahara**
Very well.
**[03:22] Senjougahara**
Since you're so insistent,
**[03:23] Senjougahara**
so pathetic, that I can't
bear to look at you,
**[03:25] Senjougahara**
I'll give you some water,
out of sympathy.
**[03:27] Senjougahara**
Be grateful,
**[03:28] Senjougahara**
water-drinking bird.
**[03:29] Araragi**
"Water-drinking bird" isn't
really an insult, is it?
**[03:41] Senjougahara**
Lick it.
**[03:43] Senjougahara**
What's wrong?
**[03:45] Senjougahara**
You're thirsty, aren't you?
**[03:46] Senjougahara**
So stretch out your tongue,
**[03:48] Senjougahara**
and naughtily lick it, like a giraffe.
**[03:51] Araragi**
Hey, Senjougahara.
**[03:52] Senjougahara**
What?
**[03:53] Senjougahara**
Aren't you thirsty?
**[03:56] Senjougahara**
Or was that a lie?
**[03:58] Senjougahara**
Liars should be punished.
**[04:01] Araragi**
I'll lick it!
**[04:01] Araragi**
I'll totally lick it!
**[04:02] Araragi**
Please let me lick it!
**[04:05] Senjougahara**
How pathetic.
**[04:06] Senjougahara**
The ultimate in pathetic.
**[04:08] Senjougahara**
No normal person would do this,
just for some water.
**[04:10] Senjougahara**
I'm sure you're
**[04:12] Senjougahara**
a pervert who just enjoys licking
girls' fingers, right?
**[04:16] Araragi**
*Senjougahara-san was enjoying herself
so much, I thought she'd explode.*
**[04:20] Senjougahara**
It's such a wonderful picture, I want to
set it as my cell phone wallpaper.
**[04:24] Araragi**
Yeah? Glad to hear it.
**[04:27] Araragi**
Then, next I'd like a rice ball.
**[04:29] Senjougahara**
All right.
**[04:29] Senjougahara**
I'm in one of my rare generous moods.
**[04:32] Senjougahara**
What do you want in it?
**[04:33] Araragi**
It doesn't matter.
**[04:34] Senjougahara**
An apathetic reply.
**[04:35] Senjougahara**
Do you prefer bread?
**[04:37] Araragi**
That's not really it.
**[04:39] Araragi**
And as near as I can tell,
you haven't bought any bread.
**[04:42] Senjougahara**
That's true.
**[04:42] Senjougahara**
I only brought rice balls.
**[04:44] Araragi**
I won't request something you don't have.
**[04:45] Senjougahara**
If you have no bread to eat,
then you can eat cake.
**[04:48] Araragi**
Too tyrannical...
**[04:49] Senjougahara**
I was raised amidst butterflies and bees.
**[04:53] Araragi**
That should be "and flowers"!
***SIGN*** The right answer
***SIGN*** Time Passes
**[05:01] Senjougahara**
I hadn't much time today, so I got
lunch from a convenience store.
**[05:04] Senjougahara**
But don't worry, Araragi-kun.
**[05:06] Senjougahara**
Starting tomorrow, I'll make
your lunch myself.
**[05:09] Araragi**
*What is this?*
**[05:11] Araragi**
*Her motives remain unclear.*
**[05:14] Araragi**
*Oh, right.*
**[05:15] Araragi**
*Her motives are totally clear.*
**[05:17] Senjougahara**
Don't worry.
**[05:19] Senjougahara**
Araragi-kun,
**[05:20] Senjougahara**
I'll protect you.
**[05:21] Araragi**
*To protect me, right?*
**[05:24] Araragi**
*She's serious.*
**[05:25] Araragi**
Probably.
**[05:29] Araragi**
By the way, Senjougahara.
**[05:31] Araragi**
How am I supposed to use
the bathroom here?
**[05:34] Senjougahara**
Don't worry.
**[05:36] Senjougahara**
I'll change your diaper.
**[05:39] Senjougahara**
Didn't you know?
**[05:40] Senjougahara**
I love you, Araragi-kun.
**[05:43] Senjougahara**
So much that I could embrace you
without hesitation,
**[05:46] Senjougahara**
even if you were entirely
covered in feces.
**[05:48] Senjougahara**
Including your brain,
I will manage your entire body,
**[05:51] Senjougahara**
from ingestion to excretion.
**[05:54] Araragi**
*Her love is too extreme!*
***SIGN*** Episode 1: Karen Bee, Part 1
***SIGN*** 7/29 Saturday Morning
**[07:34] Araragi**
Over summer break,
I'm being tutored each day,
***SIGN*** 7/29 Saturday
**[07:38] Araragi**
except for Sundays, by Senjougahara.
**[07:40] Araragi**
And also by Hanekawa,
**[07:43] Araragi**
who has some of the school's best grades.
**[07:47] Araragi**
But on that Saturday, July 29th,
**[07:50] Araragi**
Hanekawa, with whom I was to study...
***SIGN*** Flashback
**[07:51] Hanekawa**
"Something that I absolutely
can't avoid came up.
**[07:53] Hanekawa**
I'll make it up to you
**[07:55] Hanekawa**
in exactly two days!"
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[07:58] Araragi**
And so, I'm bored.
**[08:04] Karen**
Oh, Onii-chan...
**[08:07] Karen**
Don't you have your tutoring today?
**[08:09] Araragi**
Yeah.
**[08:10] Araragi**
Hey, where is she?
**[08:12] Tsukihi**
She?
**[08:13] Araragi**
My bigger little sister.
**[08:14] Tsukihi**
Karen-chan's out.
**[08:17] Araragi**
Don't get into any trouble, you two.
**[08:19] Tsukihi**
I resent that.
We aren't planning anything.
**[08:22] Tsukihi**
You're always this way.
**[08:23] Tsukihi**
You always treat us like children.
**[08:26] Tsukihi**
You worry too much.
**[08:28] Araragi**
I'm not worried.
**[08:29] Araragi**
I just don't trust you.
**[08:31] Tsukihi**
Aren't those the same thing?
**[08:32] Araragi**
No.
**[08:33] Araragi**
Worry and trust are two
entirely different things.
**[08:37] Tsukihi**
They're both just words...
**[08:43] Araragi**
Don't stop talking halfway through!
**[08:45] Araragi**
So, where'd the bigger little sister go?
**[08:48] Tsukihi**
I told you, she isn't in any trouble.
**[08:50] Tsukihi**
In fact, she went to go help
people out of trouble.
**[08:53] Araragi**
That's trouble.
**[08:55] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan, don't interfere in
middle school kids' fights.
**[08:59] Tsukihi**
It's lame.
**[09:00] Tsukihi**
In their own way,
**[09:02] Tsukihi**
fights are also a valid form
of communication.
**[09:04] Araragi**
Well, it sounds right when
you put it like that.
**[09:09] Tsukihi**
It isn't that fights per se are wrong.
**[09:10] Tsukihi**
It's that people simply don't know
the proper way to fight.
***SIGN*** Fights
**[09:13] Araragi**
But the fights you two get involved with
**[09:15] Araragi**
are always violent.
**[09:18] Araragi**
I refuse to believe that's
the right way to fight.
**[09:22] Tsukihi**
Just shut up!
**[09:24] Tsukihi**
I don't know!
**[09:25] Tsukihi**
I don't know anything!
**[09:27] Tsukihi**
I don't know what's going on with
the bigger sister, the littler sister,
**[09:30] Tsukihi**
or the middle sister!
**[09:32] Araragi**
I don't have a middle sister...
**[09:35] Araragi**
*This is why worrying about you
isn't ever worth it.*
**[09:38] Araragi**
Jeez...
**[09:40] Araragi**
I won't tell you to grow up,
**[09:42] Araragi**
but at least keep quiet.
**[09:44] Tsukihi**
I don't want to hear that from you.
**[09:50] Araragi**
*Well, I suppose that of the two,*
**[09:52] Araragi**
*the latter is more difficult.*
**[09:54] Araragi**
*Anyone can grow up, just by aging.*
**[09:58] Araragi**
*But still, I wouldn't want them
as quiet as Sengoku.*
**[10:02] Araragi**
Oh, right. Sengoku...
***SIGN*** Flashback
**[10:04] Sengoku**
*Come over to my house next time.*
**[10:07] Araragi**
*Sure.*
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[10:10] Araragi**
*Come to think of it,*
**[10:11] Araragi**
*it's been quite a while since that.*
**[10:14] Araragi**
*This is a good chance...*
**[10:15] Sengoku**
H-Hello?!
**[10:17] Sengoku**
This is Sengoku!
**[10:18] Sengoku**
Koyomi-oniichan, it's been a while.
**[10:20] Sengoku**
What's up?
**[10:22] Araragi**
Sorry it's so abrupt,
**[10:24] Araragi**
but remember when I said I'd come over?
**[10:27] Araragi**
I was wondering if today might be good.
**[10:30] Araragi**
If it isn't a good day...
**[10:32] Sengoku**
No...
**[10:33] Sengoku**
Today, today, today!
**[10:34] Sengoku**
Actually, I'm busy every day but today.
**[10:36] Araragi**
I see.
**[10:37] Araragi**
If you're busy every day but today,
**[10:39] Araragi**
today is our only option.
**[10:41] Araragi**
How about now?
**[10:42] Sengoku**
Sure!
**[10:43] Sengoku**
Actually, no time but now will work.
**[10:44] Araragi**
Then I'll come over now.
**[10:50] Araragi**
Hey! So...
**[10:52] Tsukihi**
Bye!
**[10:53] Tsukihi**
I'll watch the house.
**[10:54] Araragi**
No, you're coming, as well.
**[10:58] Araragi**
We're going to Sengoku's,
so of course you're coming.
**[11:00] Tsukihi**
I thought for sure you'd go alone.
**[11:03] Tsukihi**
And I'm certain that's what
Sen-chan is thinking...
**[11:06] Araragi**
Really?
**[11:07] Araragi**
No way.
**[11:09] Tsukihi**
Go by yourself.
**[11:10] Tsukihi**
I'm sure she'd prefer that.
***SIGN*** Anyway
**[11:13] Tsukihi**
Anyway...
**[11:14] Tsukihi**
I won't interfere with a
friend's feeling of love.
**[11:17] Tsukihi**
Even if it's unrequited.
***SIGN*** Love?
**[11:20] Araragi**
Come?
**[11:21] Araragi**
She never said she'd love
for me to come over.
**[11:24] Araragi**
She just asked me to.
**[11:26] Araragi**
Unlike you two, she's polite.
**[11:29] Tsukihi**
By the way, Onii-chan...
**[11:31] Tsukihi**
Do you believe that boys and
girls can be friends?
**[11:34] Araragi**
Sure.
**[11:35] Araragi**
I'm Sengoku's friend!
**[11:37] Tsukihi**
I see.
**[11:38] Tsukihi**
Then I guess that works.
**[11:40] Tsukihi**
Anyway, get going.
**[11:42] Araragi**
Fine.
**[11:44] Araragi**
Then I'll go on my own.
**[11:45] Araragi**
Watch the house while I'm gone.
**[11:47] Araragi**
See you...
**[11:48] Tsukihi**
One last thing, before you go.
**[11:51] Tsukihi**
You've totally
**[11:52] Tsukihi**
stopped brawling with Karen-chan.
**[11:56] Tsukihi**
How come?
**[11:59] Araragi**
Lately, she's gotten too good at karate.
**[12:02] Araragi**
Like, way too good.
**[12:04] Araragi**
I'd lose in a straight-up fight.
**[12:06] Araragi**
Even though she's taller,
**[12:08] Araragi**
I should still be stronger.
**[12:10] Araragi**
But I guess I can't defeat a
martial arts practitioner.
**[12:14] Tsukihi**
Even if that explains things
with Karen-chan,
**[12:16] Tsukihi**
when I freaked out a minute ago,
you backed off.
**[12:19] Tsukihi**
Dealing with you has gotten a lot easier.
**[12:22] Araragi**
Well, I guess so.
**[12:23] Tsukihi**
I mean, from our perspective,
**[12:26] Tsukihi**
it's good, because it's
easier to get our way.
**[12:29] Tsukihi**
But you know,
**[12:31] Tsukihi**
really...
**[12:33] Tsukihi**
Don't just grow up and leave us behind.
**[12:35] Tsukihi**
It'd be boring that way...
**[12:42] Araragi**
*Actually, you guys never knew this,*
**[12:45] Araragi**
*but I turned into a vampire.*
**[12:46] Araragi**
*Well, I turned back.*
**[12:50] Araragi**
*But it changed me.
So it's possible...*
**[12:52] Araragi**
*And I mean possible, not certain,*
**[12:54] Araragi**
*that if I got into a real fight with you,*
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[12:57] Araragi**
*I could end up killing you both.*
**[12:59] Araragi**
*So I'm trying to avoid that.*
**[13:01] Araragi**
*How am I supposed to tell them that?*
**[13:07] Araragi**
Hey, it's Hachikuji.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** Hachikuji 5-3
**[13:18] Araragi**
But I promised to go to Sengoku's...
**[13:21] Araragi**
And I don't really like that elementary school brat, anyway.
**[13:27] Araragi**
Honest, I don't like her.
**[13:29] Araragi**
I hate her.
**[13:30] Araragi**
We're not even close enough that
I'd talk to her if I saw her.
**[13:34] Araragi**
But yeah, I guess as a high schooler,
**[13:37] Araragi**
it's kind of sad for me to act that way
toward an elementary school girl.
**[13:41] Araragi**
Honestly, I'm not happy to see her at all.
**[13:44] Araragi**
But I suppose a bare minimum of courtesy
**[13:46] Araragi**
demands that I maintain appearances.
**[13:48] Araragi**
I'm such a sap.
**[14:01] Araragi**
Hachikuji!
**[14:03] Araragi**
I've missed you...
**[14:06] Araragi**
I haven't seen you,
**[14:08] Araragi**
so I thought you'd moved away!
**[14:10] Araragi**
And I was so worried...
**[14:12] Araragi**
So let me touch you more.
**[14:14] Araragi**
Let me hug you more...
**[14:15] Araragi**
Let me lick you more!
**[14:17] Araragi**
Come on, stay put!
**[14:18] Araragi**
It makes removing your panties harder!
**[14:23] Araragi**
What are you doing?
**[14:27] Araragi**
W-Wait, Hachikuji!
**[14:30] Araragi**
Look, it's me!
**[14:36] Hachikuji**
It's Araragi...
**[14:37] Hachikuji**
Yomiko-san!
**[14:39] Araragi**
That's depressingly close.
**[14:41] Araragi**
But, Hachikuji,
**[14:43] Araragi**
I'd prefer you not call me the name
of a paper-using secret agent
**[14:45] Araragi**
for the British Library who lives in a
book-filled Jinbouchou building.
**[14:49] Araragi**
My name is Araragi Koyomi.
***SIGN*** Excepting Light Vehicles
**[14:53] Hachikuji**
But that aside, Araragi-san,
**[14:55] Hachikuji**
where are you going today?
**[14:57] Hachikuji**
Nowhere special...
***SIGN*** Excepting Boys
**[14:59] Hachikuji**
Searching for new Araragi harem members?
**[15:01] Araragi**
I never founded any such creepy group!
**[15:04] Hachikuji**
An original member,
**[15:05] Hachikuji**
Oshino-san, has graduated now...
**[15:07] Hachikuji**
It'll be a difficult gap to fill.
**[15:11] Araragi**
Even assuming this so-called
Araragi harem's existence,
**[15:13] Araragi**
why would Oshino be a member?
***SIGN*** No Old Men Allowed
**[15:16] Araragi**
He's an old guy in a floral shirt!
**[15:17] Hachikuji**
Add too many members,
**[15:19] Hachikuji**
and the story will be hard to follow.
***SIGN*** Watch for Bears
**[15:20] Hachikuji**
So be careful.
**[15:23] Araragi**
Well, I told you about Sengoku right?
**[15:26] Araragi**
A girl I used to know...
**[15:28] Araragi**
I'm going over to her place today.
**[15:31] Hachikuji**
Given that, you seemed rather unhappy.
**[15:33] Araragi**
Did I?
**[15:34] Araragi**
I looked that unhappy?
**[15:36] Hachikuji**
Yeah!
**[15:37] Hachikuji**
Like a story that's gotten a lot of
mileage from jokes about how
**[15:41] Hachikuji**
it'll never be animated,
due to some screw-up.
**[15:44] Hachikuji**
You had an awkwardness that
was reminiscent of that.
**[15:47] Araragi**
My face was hardly that specific!
**[15:49] Hachikuji**
Well, I can understand that you'd be
wary of unexpected happiness.
**[15:53] Hachikuji**
But any time you enter a new arena,
**[15:55] Hachikuji**
there's something to be gained.
**[15:57] Araragi**
Something to be gained? Like what?
**[16:00] Hachikuji**
In a word...
**[16:01] Hachikuji**
Money.
**[16:02] Araragi**
No, aren't there other things?
**[16:05] Hachikuji**
Is there really anything else in the world?
**[16:07] Araragi**
Sure!
**[16:08] Araragi**
Like you know...
**[16:10] Araragi**
Love!
***SIGN*** Love
**[16:10] Hachikuji**
Huh? Love?
**[16:12] Hachikuji**
Oh, yeah! I know love.
**[16:13] Hachikuji**
The convenience store was selling it.
***SIGN*** Love, Now On Sale
**[16:15] Araragi**
They were selling it?!
At the convenience store?
**[16:17] Hachikuji**
Yup, for 298 yen.
**[16:19] Araragi**
A bargain!
**[16:20] Hachikuji**
Talk of money aside, Araragi-san,
**[16:22] Hachikuji**
I've been looking forward to this.
**[16:25] Hachikuji**
What kind of dance will
we do during the ED?
**[16:28] Araragi**
It's a given that we're dancing?
**[16:30] Hachikuji**
I'm hoping for something like in *Cat's Eye*,
**[16:32] Hachikuji**
nice and sexy!
**[16:33] Araragi**
You're okay with just silhouettes?!
**[16:36] Araragi**
Anyway, that's not it, Hachikuji.
**[16:38] Araragi**
Oh, right... I guess I can tell you.
**[16:41] Araragi**
You know I'm actually a vampire, right?
**[16:45] Hachikuji**
I see, Shuraragi-san.
**[16:46] Araragi**
That name's pretty cool,
**[16:48] Araragi**
and honestly, I'd like to change mine to it.
**[16:50] Araragi**
But Hachikuji,
**[16:50] Araragi**
I've told you over and over,
**[16:52] Araragi**
my name is Araragi.
**[16:54] Hachikuji**
Sorry! I bit my tongue.
**[16:55] Araragi**
No, you did it deliberately.
**[16:57] Hachikuji**
I bwit my twongue!
**[16:58] Araragi**
It wasn't deliberate?
**[16:59] Hachikuji**
Seen the Family Mart?
**[17:00] Araragi**
No, I don't know where the
convenience store is!
**[17:02] Araragi**
Is it love?
**[17:03] Araragi**
Are you going to buy love?
**[17:04] Araragi**
For 298 yen?!
**[17:07] Hachikuji**
I see, a vampire.
**[17:09] Hachikuji**
But what about it?
**[17:11] Araragi**
Well, it's really hard to tell
**[17:13] Araragi**
my family about it, you know?
**[17:16] Araragi**
But I'm not sure it's something
I can hide forever.
**[17:20] Hachikuji**
I don't think it's really necessary
**[17:23] Hachikuji**
to just come out and tell them.
**[17:25] Hachikuji**
I think keeping a secret or two
from your family is natural.
**[17:28] Araragi**
Hachikuji?
**[17:30] Hachikuji**
For one thing, sharing your
secret with someone
**[17:33] Hachikuji**
means you involve them in your problems.
**[17:36] Hachikuji**
It may make things easier for you,
**[17:39] Hachikuji**
but your family could end up
suffering for it.
**[17:43] Araragi**
That's true, isn't it?
**[17:45] Hachikuji**
Right now, what you need is
**[17:47] Hachikuji**
the courage to keep your
secret to yourself!
**[17:50] Araragi**
That sounds very wise.
**[17:51] Hachikuji**
Well, I'm just making it sound positive
**[17:54] Hachikuji**
by adding the word "courage" to it.
**[17:55] Hachikuji**
Really, it's just a normal secret.
**[17:57] Araragi**
That sounds very honest!
**[17:59] Hachikuji**
You can make almost anything
**[18:01] Hachikuji**
sound positive by adding
the word "courage."
**[18:03] Araragi**
That can't be right.
**[18:05] Araragi**
I refuse to believe that Japanese
is structured that way.
**[18:09] Hachikuji**
Shall I demonstrate?
**[18:11] Araragi**
Bring it.
**[18:15] Araragi**
If you can satisfy me,
**[18:18] Araragi**
I'll do a handstand, right here.
**[18:20] Hachikuji**
A handstand?
**[18:21] Araragi**
Yes...
**[18:22] Araragi**
Like getting on your knees
to bow, but better.
**[18:24] Araragi**
And if you can't satisfy me,
**[18:28] Araragi**
then you have to do a handstand here,
**[18:30] Araragi**
wearing your skirt!
**[18:31] Araragi**
Your kiddy panties will be
exposed to public view,
**[18:34] Araragi**
until I allow you to stop!
**[18:36] Hachikuji**
Very well.
**[18:37] Hachikuji**
I accept your challenge.
**[18:39] Araragi**
I praise your guts, if nothing else.
**[18:41] Hachikuji**
You're like a phoenix
to the flame, Araragi-san.
**[18:44] Araragi**
No, I'm nothing as cool as that.
**[18:48] Hachikuji**
We'll start with warm-ups.
***SIGN*** Courage Series
**[18:50] Hachikuji**
The courage to lie to your lover.
**[18:53] Araragi**
*Not bad...*
**[18:54] Araragi**
*All you're doing is simply lying,*
**[18:57] Araragi**
*but tacking "courage" onto it*
**[18:59] Araragi**
*makes it sound like you're
lying for your lover's sake.*
**[19:01] Araragi**
*Even though she hasn't said
anything suggesting that.*
**[19:03] Hachikuji**
The courage to betray your comrades.
**[19:04] Araragi**
What?!
**[19:05] Araragi**
*Amazing...*
**[19:06] Araragi**
*The end result is that you've
betrayed your comrades.*
**[19:09] Araragi**
*But that gives the impression*
**[19:10] Araragi**
*that you've somehow protected them.*
**[19:12] Araragi**
*Even though she hasn't said
anything suggesting that!*
**[19:14] Hachikuji**
The courage to be a lazy bum.
**[19:15] Araragi**
Wh-What?
**[19:17] Araragi**
*It really can do anything!*
**[19:19] Araragi**
*You're just meaninglessly
whiling away your life,*
**[19:21] Araragi**
*but that makes it sound like you've*
**[19:23] Araragi**
*positioned yourself in poverty,
all for some greater goal.*
**[19:25] Araragi**
*Even though she hasn't said anything,*
**[19:26] Araragi**
*anything at all, suggesting that!*
**[19:28] Araragi**
*B-But I cannot admit defeat here!*
**[19:31] Hachikuji**
The courage to admit defeat.
**[19:33] Araragi**
*I admit my defeat!*
**[19:35] Araragi**
I was lulled by the awesomeness of the words
**[19:37] Araragi**
into admitting my own defeat!
**[19:39] Araragi**
And all I did was admit defeat...
**[19:41] Araragi**
Japanese is really simple!
**[19:43] Hachikuji**
Now, Araragi-san.
**[19:44] Hachikuji**
Show me something better than
getting on your knees to bow.
**[19:46] Araragi**
Very well...
**[19:48] Araragi**
I have the courage to do a handstand!
**[19:54] Hachikuji**
Seeing someone your age doing a
handstand is actually kind of pathetic...
**[19:58] Hachikuji**
You can stop.
**[20:01] Hachikuji**
I said you could stop, Araragi-san.
**[20:05] Hachikuji**
Actually, please stop, Araragi-san.
**[20:07] Hachikuji**
I'm embarrassed, just being next to you.
**[20:11] Hachikuji**
Why continue your handstand,
**[20:12] Hachikuji**
as if it were a promise made in response
to a friend's last request?
**[20:16] Araragi**
Well, you know...
**[20:18] Araragi**
I was just thinking
**[20:20] Araragi**
that if I stood on my hands,
**[20:22] Araragi**
from this angle, I can see your panties.
**[20:27] Hachikuji**
Araragi-san, you are a pervert!
**[20:29] Araragi**
The courage to accept the label of pervert!
**[20:32] Hachikuji**
So cool!
**[20:34] Hachikuji**
So cool, I'm tempted to have the courage
to show you my panties as you wish!
**[20:38] Hachikuji**
Especially the way you continue,
**[20:39] Hachikuji**
even after I kicked you in the face!
**[20:42] Hachikuji**
I can't believe the technology I developed
**[20:45] Hachikuji**
has now been turned against me...
**[20:47] Hachikuji**
So ironic.
**[20:49] Araragi**
You grew overconfident, Hachikuji!
**[20:51] Araragi**
I have mastered your secret technique!
**[20:54] Hachikuji**
Oh, no.
**[20:56] Hachikuji**
I may have created a monster!
**[21:00] Araragi**
But I do apologize for
calling them kiddy panties.
**[21:03] Araragi**
I never expected
**[21:04] Araragi**
you'd be wearing
semi-transparent black panties.
**[21:08] Hachikuji**
What are you saying?
**[21:09] Hachikuji**
Take a closer look!
**[21:10] Hachikuji**
Don't say that!
**[21:11] Hachikuji**
It'll ruin my image!
**[21:13] Hachikuji**
I've responded to consumer demand,
and am wearing kiddy panties!
**[21:16] Hachikuji**
They have a bunny on them, right?
**[21:18] Araragi**
I can't see any bunnies.
**[21:20] Araragi**
If you want me to see them,
you have to make it easier.
**[21:23] Hachikuji**
L-Like this?
**[21:26] Hachikuji**
Like this?
**[21:34] Araragi**
Oh, yeah.
**[21:35] Araragi**
We were talking about the need
**[21:37] Araragi**
to keep the supernatural a secret, right?
**[21:39] Hachikuji**
You see, Araragi-san,
**[21:41] Hachikuji**
in a way, the supernatural is
what's behind the curtain.
**[21:44] Araragi**
Behind the curtain?
**[21:46] Hachikuji**
Normally, you only need to see
what's happening on stage.
**[21:49] Hachikuji**
That's how reality works.
**[21:51] Hachikuji**
If you don't know,
**[21:52] Hachikuji**
then it's best that you don't.
**[21:54] Hachikuji**
Actually, learning about the supernatural
**[21:56] Hachikuji**
only increases the number
of things you don't know.
**[21:59] Araragi**
I see.
**[22:01] Hachikuji**
So, Araragi-san...
**[22:02] Hachikuji**
If your family should ever
**[22:05] Hachikuji**
find themselves unfortunately backstage,
**[22:08] Hachikuji**
you can guide them out.
**[22:11] Hachikuji**
But until then,
the answer is to do nothing.
**[22:14] Araragi**
I see.
**[22:16] Araragi**
Anyway, we've been talking a while.
**[22:19] Araragi**
Sorry for stopping you, Hachikuji.
**[22:21] Hachikuji**
It's fine.
**[22:23] Hachikuji**
I'm always basically lost.
**[22:26] Araragi**
That's not...
**[22:27] Hachikuji**
In a way,
**[22:28] Hachikuji**
I guess I was just walking around, saying,
**[22:31] Hachikuji**
"Isn't Araragi-san's house here?
**[22:32] Hachikuji**
I haven't seen him in a while!
**[22:34] Hachikuji**
Maybe I can see him again."
**[22:37] Araragi**
Yeah...
**[22:38] Araragi**
Well, bye!
**[22:39] Hachikuji**
Yeah, let's meet again.
**[22:43] Araragi**
Hey, Hachikuji.
**[22:46] Araragi**
You aren't going to disappear, are you?
**[22:50] Araragi**
Because, you know, Oshino's gone.
**[22:53] Araragi**
I just wondered if you were going
to vanish like he did.
**[22:57] Hachikuji**
You spend so much time
worrying about others,
**[23:00] Hachikuji**
the only people you foist
**[23:03] Hachikuji**
your problems on are Shinobu-san and me.
**[23:08] Hachikuji**
I'm honored, really...
**[23:11] Araragi**
Hachikuji...
**[23:12] Hachikuji**
Then let me ask you
a question, Araragi-san.
**[23:15] Hachikuji**
If I'm ever in really bad trouble again,
**[23:18] Hachikuji**
would you help me?
**[23:21] Araragi**
Sure, I would.
**[23:22] Araragi**
Of course I would.
**[23:23] Araragi**
I won't give anyone else
enough time to save you.
**[23:27] Hachikuji**
I can talk to you about my problems?
**[23:28] Araragi**
If you don't, I'll get mad!
**[23:33] Hachikuji**
That's just like you.
**[23:37] Hachikuji**
I'm sure there's a reason that,
**[23:39] Hachikuji**
even after I stopped being lost,
**[23:41] Hachikuji**
I stayed here.
**[23:43] Hachikuji**
I won't leave until I know
what that reason is.
**[23:47] Araragi**
The reason, huh?
**[23:49] Hachikuji**
Well, even if I do go away someday,
**[23:53] Hachikuji**
before I do, I'll come to say goodbye.
**[23:57] Araragi**
I see...
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[24:01] Araragi**
Okay, then you do that.
**[24:05] Hachikuji**
Yeah.
**[24:06] Hachikuji**
I'd be scared of having you
mad at me, you know?
# E2 - Karen Bee, Part Two
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GY8VM1V0Y/karen-bee-part-2)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Araragi**
The older of my sisters, Araragi Karen...
**[00:03] Araragi**
A third-year in middle school.
**[00:05] Araragi**
Had a birthday at the end of June,
turning fifteen.
**[00:08] Araragi**
She's always been a tomboy
who excels at most sports.
**[00:12] Araragi**
But her talents seemed best suited to combat.
**[00:16] Araragi**
She earned her karate in black belt in record time.
**[00:20] Araragi**
She enjoyed fighting too much
to appear truly feminine.
**[00:25] Araragi**
I wouldn't call her manly,
**[00:27] Araragi**
but the aggressive look in her eye
makes her appear boyish.
**[00:32] Araragi**
And the younger of my sisters, Araragi Tsukihi...
**[00:35] Araragi**
A second-year in middle school.
**[00:36] Araragi**
Her birthday falls in early April,
**[00:38] Araragi**
which makes her fourteen now.
**[00:40] Araragi**
Karen is, well,
**[00:42] Araragi**
exactly what she looks like.
**[00:44] Araragi**
But Tsukihi's appearance
belies her true nature.
**[00:47] Araragi**
But what's important is that her true nature
does not belie her appearance.
**[00:51] Araragi**
She looks extremely feminine,
**[00:54] Araragi**
but her nature is even more
aggressive than Karen's.
**[00:57] Araragi**
And she's easily provoked.
**[00:59] Araragi**
Her fits could almost be called hysterics.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[01:03] Araragi**
The Fire Sisters of Tsuganoki
2nd Middle School...
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[01:06] Araragi**
The pair has formed what
could be considered
**[01:08] Araragi**
either a rescue squad or a heroic duo,
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[01:12] Araragi**
a game that occupies the
majority of their time.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[01:15] Araragi**
Of course, were you to tell them that...
**[01:18] Tsukihi**
It isn't a game, Nii-chan!
**[01:20] Tsukihi**
We aren't the good guys.
**[01:21] Tsukihi**
We're goodness itself, Onii-chan.
**[01:25] Araragi**
...is what they'd tell you.
**[01:26] Araragi**
I can usually anticipate what they'll say.
**[01:30] Araragi**
But I can say this without hesitation...
**[01:34] Araragi**
Araragi Karen and Araragi Tsukihi,
**[01:37] Araragi**
the actions of the Fire Sisters
**[01:39] Araragi**
are nothing but a game.
**[01:43] Araragi**
Because, my dear sisters,
**[01:45] Araragi**
you are irredeemable fakes.
***SIGN*** Episode 2: Karen Bee, Part 2
**[03:32] Araragi**
Sengoku, that's how you do it at home?
**[03:37] Sengoku**
D-Do what?
**[03:40] Araragi**
Those bangs.
**[03:41] Sengoku**
B-Bangs?
**[03:44] Sengoku**
Wh-What are you talking about?
**[03:46] Araragi**
*She's pretending to have no idea.*
**[03:47] Sengoku**
I-I definitely didn't work up the courage
**[03:51] Sengoku**
to change my hairstyle because you were
**[03:54] Sengoku**
coming over to my house
for the first time.
**[03:59] Sengoku**
Come in, Koyomi-oniichan.
**[04:02] Araragi**
Sure...
**[04:10] Araragi**
Hey, Sengoku...
**[04:11] Araragi**
Where are your mom and dad?
**[04:12] Sengoku**
My parents work on Saturdays.
**[04:16] Araragi**
Just like mine.
**[04:18] Araragi**
So that's why you answered the phone.
**[04:22] Sengoku**
My room is on the second floor.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[04:29] Araragi**
Sengoku, that clo—
**[04:32] Sengoku**
Don't open it!
**[04:32] Araragi**
—set...
**[04:34] Sengoku**
I'd never forgive anyone,
even you, for opening it.
**[04:41] Sengoku**
Okay, have a seat there,
**[04:43] Sengoku**
Koyomi-oniichan.
**[04:44] Araragi**
There? On the bed?
**[04:46] Araragi**
You're sure?
**[04:47] Sengoku**
Yeah.
**[04:48] Sengoku**
You can't sit anywhere but on the bed...
**[04:55] Sengoku**
This room is kind of hot, isn't it?
**[05:01] Sengoku**
Wh-Why don't you take off your
sweatshirt, Koyomi-oniichan?
**[05:05] Araragi**
Me?
**[05:06] Sengoku**
Even if you aren't hot,
you still have no choice
**[05:08] Sengoku**
but to remove your sweatshirt.
**[05:10] Araragi**
I have no choice but to remove it, huh?
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[05:13] Sengoku**
Koyomi-oniichan, let's play a King Game.
**[05:13] Sengoku**
[In a King Game, one person issues orders, of an often
sexual nature, to others, referred to by number.]
**[05:17] Araragi**
Sengoku, do you even know
what the King Game is?
**[05:22] Araragi**
It has nothing to do with a deck of cards.
**[05:25] Sengoku**
I know what it is.
**[05:26] Sengoku**
It's like Captain's Orders, right?
***SIGN*** Simon Says
**[05:30] Sengoku**
The king's word is law!
**[05:32] Araragi**
Too political!
**[05:34] Araragi**
Well, I've never played it before,
so I don't really know.
**[05:37] Araragi**
But, Sengoku,
**[05:38] Araragi**
you can't have a King Game
with only two players.
**[05:42] Sengoku**
Why not?
**[05:43] Sengoku**
I'm fine with either role.
**[05:46] Sengoku**
Giving the orders and taking them.
**[05:49] Araragi**
W-Well, let's not play that...
**[05:55] Sengoku**
Then let's play the Game of Life,
Koyomi-oniichan.
**[05:58] Araragi**
The Game of Life, huh?
**[06:00] Araragi**
Sure, that sounds fun.
**[06:01] Sengoku**
The word of Life is law!
**[06:03] Araragi**
Deep!
**[06:04] Araragi**
Oh, yeah.
**[06:06] Araragi**
We used to play that at my place, right?
**[06:10] Sengoku**
Yeah, I remember.
**[06:11] Araragi**
Yeah?
**[06:12] Sengoku**
I never forgot.
**[06:17] Araragi**
*Koyomi-oniichan will not
get dirty thoughts*
**[06:21] Araragi**
*from looking at Sengoku's body.*
**[06:24] Araragi**
*Aren't you glad I'm such
a gentleman, Sengoku?*
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** Time Passes
**[06:27] Araragi**
Sengoku, has anything been
happening lately?
**[06:31] Sengoku**
Wh-What do you mean?
**[06:33] Araragi**
I mean anything like what
happened before.
**[06:36] Sengoku**
No, I've been fine.
**[06:38] Araragi**
I see.
**[06:39] Sengoku**
But there's some weird charm
circulating, as usual.
**[06:44] Araragi**
At your school?
**[06:45] Sengoku**
Yeah, but not just at my school.
**[06:48] Sengoku**
Among all the middle schoolers.
**[06:51] Sengoku**
I think Rara-chan and the others
are up to something.
**[06:55] Araragi**
*Up to something?*
**[06:57] Sengoku**
When I talked to Rara-chan a while ago,
**[06:59] Sengoku**
she asked about what happened
with the snake.
**[07:02] Sengoku**
And since I couldn't tell her the truth,
**[07:06] Sengoku**
I didn't say too much.
**[07:09] Sengoku**
But she was getting others to
help her investigate stuff.
**[07:13] Araragi**
In other words,
**[07:13] Araragi**
it has to do with that charm.
**[07:16] Araragi**
But to be precise, that whole
**[07:19] Araragi**
curse was basically nonsense, right?
**[07:21] Araragi**
In your case, you just chose the
wrong way to handle it.
**[07:25] Sengoku**
Yeah.
**[07:26] Sengoku**
I was the only one
**[07:27] Sengoku**
for whom anything actually
manifested that way, I think.
**[07:34] Sengoku**
But that's just a guess.
**[07:35] Araragi**
Then...
**[07:36] Sengoku**
I don't think they're worried about the curse actually working.
**[07:41] Sengoku**
I think they probably
**[07:44] Sengoku**
don't even believe in the supernatural.
**[07:47] Araragi**
Yeah, I'm sure.
**[07:49] Sengoku**
It seems like they're more concerned
**[07:52] Sengoku**
with the fact that nonsense of
that sort is going around.
**[07:56] Sengoku**
They said they're trying to discover
**[07:59] Sengoku**
who's spreading it.
**[08:01] Araragi**
No one's trying to spread it.
**[08:04] Araragi**
And even should they find someone,
**[08:07] Araragi**
now that it's spread, it isn't
their responsibility.
**[08:09] Sengoku**
That's just Rara-chan...
Or rather, the Fire Sisters.
**[08:14] Sengoku**
They seemed on the verge of saying
**[08:18] Sengoku**
that someone had deliberately spread
the charm for their own reasons.
**[08:25] Araragi**
That sounds just like them...
**[08:27] Araragi**
*Sheesh.*
**[08:28] Araragi**
*I'm gonna have to talk to Karen.*
**[08:32] Araragi**
*It isn't something I have
to get involved in...*
**[08:35] Araragi**
*But given the percent*
**[08:36] Araragi**
*of Sengoku Nadeko involved, it's delicate.*
**[08:41] Sengoku**
K-Koyomi-oniichan?
**[08:43] Araragi**
It's nothing!
**[08:44] Araragi**
I'm fine, Sengoku.
**[08:46] Araragi**
Anyway, Sengoku...
**[08:48] Araragi**
You look better that way.
**[08:51] Araragi**
I mean your bangs.
**[08:52] Araragi**
You should do it like that outside.
**[08:54] Sengoku**
B-But I'm embarrassed!
**[08:57] Sengoku**
But if you want me to...
**[09:01] Sengoku**
I'll do my best.
**[09:02] Araragi**
Yeah, doing your best is always good.
**[09:04] Araragi**
Anyway, we're almost done
with the Game of Life.
**[09:08] Araragi**
What do you want to do after this?
**[09:10] Sengoku**
Twister!
**[09:13] Araragi**
I don't know Twister.
**[09:14] Araragi**
How do you play? Show me.
**[09:16] Sengoku**
Okay, I'll show you...
**[09:18] Sengoku**
I'll show your body.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[09:24] Araragi**
I can't wait!
**[09:27] Araragi**
After that, Sengoku's mom
suddenly came home.
**[09:30] Sengoku**
I-I didn't tell them you
were coming over!
**[09:35] Sengoku**
She'll get mad! She'll get mad!
**[09:37] Sengoku**
If she sees me dressed this way,
she'll think I'm a pervert...
**[09:45] Araragi**
*I wonder why...*
**[09:47] Araragi**
*I think the fact that there was
a problem at her mom's workplace*
**[09:50] Araragi**
*saved something important
for me, as a man.*
**[09:56] Araragi**
*It was supposed to be
tomorrow, but eh...*
**[10:00] Suruga**
This is Kanbaru Suruga!
**[10:02] Suruga**
Kanbaru Suruga...
**[10:04] Suruga**
Primary weapon, accelerator.
**[10:05] Araragi**
You're a cyborg?!
**[10:08] Suruga**
That voice and joke...
**[10:10] Suruga**
It's you, Araragi-sempai.
**[10:10] Araragi**
Yeah, but...
**[10:12] Araragi**
Hey, you're at home, right?
**[10:15] Suruga**
Yes, I am.
**[10:16] Suruga**
Would you wait a minute, Araragi-sempai?
**[10:19] Suruga**
I'll take my clothes off, right now.
**[10:21] Araragi**
Why?
**[10:23] Suruga**
What are you talking about,
Araragi-sempai?
**[10:26] Suruga**
It may be over the phone,
but I'm still speaking to you.
**[10:29] Suruga**
Thus, courtesy dictates that
I must be naked.
**[10:32] Araragi**
Don't speak as though I've
never heard of courtesy.
**[10:36] Araragi**
And stop trying to find excuses to strip!
**[10:39] Suruga**
You've underestimated me.
**[10:40] Suruga**
I guess you don't understand
how fast I really am.
**[10:45] Suruga**
I'm already naked!
**[10:47] Araragi**
Already naked?
**[10:48] Araragi**
Your perversion has finally gone further
**[10:50] Araragi**
than I'm willing to go, Kanbaru!
**[10:52] Suruga**
Oh, my...
**[10:54] Suruga**
This is my house, and this is my room.
**[10:57] Suruga**
No matter what I may wear or don't,
**[10:58] Suruga**
that's a decision for me, and no one else.
**[11:01] Araragi**
You're right.
**[11:02] Araragi**
Sorry.
**[11:04] Araragi**
You weren't getting naked
outside or anything.
**[11:06] Araragi**
I'm sorry for yelling.
**[11:07] Suruga**
No, so long as you understand, it's fine.
**[11:10] Suruga**
No matter how liberated I feel when naked,
**[11:13] Suruga**
I only go outside naked occasionally.
**[11:16] Araragi**
You do it occasionally?!
**[11:17] Suruga**
Like in a bath.
**[11:20] Suruga**
Or with the basketball team...
**[11:21] Araragi**
You won't trick me this time...
**[11:23] Araragi**
I bet it was at the bath,
during your team trip, right?
**[11:25] Suruga**
Close.
**[11:26] Suruga**
It was on our trip.
**[11:29] Suruga**
During the summer of our first year,
I led a naked team trip.
**[11:33] Araragi**
I hope your team gets banned!
**[11:35] Suruga**
What's wrong, Araragi-sempai?
**[11:38] Suruga**
It was obviously a joke.
**[11:40] Suruga**
For you to believe such an obvious lie,
**[11:42] Suruga**
you may be even dirtier than I am.
**[11:46] Araragi**
Wh-What?
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[11:49] Suruga**
What's wrong, Kanbaru?
**[11:50] Suruga**
I accidentally forgot to close
the partition to my room...
***SIGN*** Grandmother
**[11:54] Suruga**
And my grandmother came
down the hallway.
**[11:58] Suruga**
She looked at me with sad eyes,
**[12:02] Suruga**
and passed me without missing a step!
**[12:06] Araragi**
Well, the granddaughter she
raised was on the phone,
**[12:09] Araragi**
while stark naked.
**[12:12] Suruga**
My life is over...
**[12:14] Suruga**
How can I ever talk to her again?
**[12:17] Araragi**
Hey, Kanbaru.
**[12:19] Araragi**
Sorry to interrupt your emotional trauma,
**[12:21] Araragi**
but I unexpectedly have the
day off from my test prep.
**[12:24] Araragi**
I know I promised to help clean
your room tomorrow.
**[12:28] Araragi**
But how about today?
**[12:29] Suruga**
Sure...
**[12:30] Suruga**
That's fine.
**[12:32] Suruga**
Whatever day is best for you.
**[12:35] Araragi**
Then I'll be right there.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[13:07] Karen**
Oh, it's you, Nii-chan?
**[13:09] Karen**
I thought it was an enemy.
**[13:10] Araragi**
Do you have enemies?
**[13:13] Araragi**
Jeez.
**[13:14] Araragi**
Doing handstands that way, in public...
**[13:17] Araragi**
Don't you have any dignity?
**[13:19] Araragi**
You should act more like a girl
who's going through puberty.
**[13:22] Araragi**
What if you get a reputation?
**[13:24] Karen**
I'm not sure I follow,
**[13:27] Karen**
but I think you're trying to avoid
talking about yourself.
**[13:30] Araragi**
I'm not doing that at all.
**[13:32] Araragi**
What are you doing out here?
**[13:35] Karen**
Community service.
**[13:36] Karen**
Just a bit of volunteer work.
**[13:38] Araragi**
Volunteer work?
**[13:40] Araragi**
You don't even know what
that word means, idiot.
**[13:50] Karen**
What are you doing, Nii-chan?!
**[13:52] Karen**
That's dangerous.
**[13:53] Araragi**
What's dangerous is what you're doing.
**[13:55] Araragi**
And what are you doing?
**[13:58] Karen**
I told you, community service.
**[14:00] Karen**
Who do you think I am?
**[14:03] Araragi**
I don't know.
**[14:04] Araragi**
Who are you, anyway?
**[14:06] Karen**
Slayer of a thousand demons...
**[14:09] Karen**
Hell's guard dog, the Gumshoe Master!
**[14:12] Araragi**
How cool...
**[14:13] Karen**
Super-cool and perfect!
**[14:14] Araragi**
I guarantee that, if nothing else,
that pose is not cool at all.
**[14:18] Karen**
Well, I'm a brightly burning girl.
**[14:19] Araragi**
Burn to death.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[14:21] Araragi**
But I will admit that I enjoy
the inherent humor
**[14:25] Araragi**
of saying cool things in
that ridiculous pose.
**[14:27] Karen**
I see, I see...
**[14:29] Karen**
Then we'll make it a running gag of mine.
**[14:33] Araragi**
Okay, let's practice.
**[14:36] Araragi**
Say something cool. Anything at all.
**[14:39] Karen**
If you wish to pass here, you must defeat me first!
**[14:42] Araragi**
*Cooler than expected.*
**[14:44] Karen**
And the reverse...
**[14:45] Karen**
Leave this to me. You go on ahead!
**[14:50] Karen**
Anyway,
**[14:51] Karen**
I'm busy with some stuff right now.
**[14:56] Karen**
Nii-chan, if you want to chat,
**[14:58] Karen**
we'll do it tonight with Tsukihi-chan.
**[15:00] Karen**
Will that work?
**[15:05] Karen**
Hello?
**[15:08] Karen**
Oh, yeah...
**[15:17] Karen**
Nii-chan...
**[15:18] Karen**
It's okay.
**[15:19] Karen**
It looks like this really will be over soon.
**[15:23] Karen**
Seems I'll have a heroic tale
**[15:26] Karen**
to tell tonight!
**[15:29] Araragi**
Who'd listen to that?
**[15:31] Araragi**
The worst part of my day so far
**[15:33] Araragi**
is finding out that you've nearly
finished middle school,
**[15:36] Araragi**
but still walk on your hands through the city.
**[15:39] Karen**
Bye!
**[15:41] Karen**
Hasta la vista!
***SIGN*** Suruga's Grandmother: Ah... Be kind to Suruga, Koyomi-kun.
**[15:55] Araragi**
K-Kanbaru?
**[15:58] Kanbaru**
Is that you, Araragi-sempai?
**[16:00] Araragi**
Wait, Kanbaru!
**[16:01] Araragi**
Do not turn over right now...
**[16:02] Araragi**
If you turn over, we'll have a big problem!
**[16:06] Kanbaru**
Oh, I apologize for this...
**[16:11] Kanbaru**
I'm embarrassed to be this way
in front of you.
**[16:15] Kanbaru**
But for you to open the partition
without knocking...
**[16:19] Kanbaru**
That isn't anything like the
Araragi-sempai I know,
**[16:22] Kanbaru**
the paragon of virtue.
**[16:25] Araragi**
Um, well...
**[16:27] Araragi**
I wanted to see you depressed...
**[16:31] Kanbaru**
If such an ugly thing satisfies you,
you're free to watch as much as you like.
**[16:36] Kanbaru**
Look long and well.
**[16:38] Kanbaru**
This is who Kanbaru Suruga truly is.
**[16:41] Kanbaru**
With nothing at all concealed.
**[16:43] Araragi**
Well, that is...
**[16:46] Araragi**
Sorry.
**[16:48] Araragi**
Sorry, Kanbaru.
**[16:50] Araragi**
Let me take responsibility.
**[16:51] Kanbaru**
Responsibility?
**[16:52] Kanbaru**
What could you mean by responsibility,
Araragi-sempai?
**[16:56] Araragi**
Let's get married!
**[16:57] Kanbaru**
Wh-Why marriage?
**[17:00] Araragi**
Well, even if it was just your
back half, I saw you naked.
**[17:03] Kanbaru**
You're skipping a few steps there.
**[17:06] Kanbaru**
By that theory,
**[17:07] Kanbaru**
how many girls would you need to marry?
**[17:13] Araragi**
That isn't a very nice thing to say!
**[17:16] Kanbaru**
Araragi-sempai,
**[17:18] Kanbaru**
that's an extraordinarily attractive offer,
**[17:21] Kanbaru**
but you don't need to take responsibility.
**[17:23] Kanbaru**
If you did that, Senjougahara-sempai
would get mad at me.
**[17:28] Kanbaru**
Instead, Araragi-sempai,
I do have a request...
**[17:32] Kanbaru**
Would you fulfill it?
**[17:35] Araragi**
Sure, anything.
**[17:37] Araragi**
For today, I'm your slave!
**[17:39] Kanbaru**
I'd like to get dressed.
Could you wait in the hall?
**[17:52] Araragi**
Kanbaru, what's this?
**[17:53] Kanbaru**
Oh, my team uniform.
***SIGN*** Come to a Complete Stop
**[17:56] Kanbaru**
I wondered where it had gone.
**[17:59] Kanbaru**
And there it was.
***SIGN*** No Entry
**[18:01] Araragi**
A practice uniform?
**[18:03] Kanbaru**
No, it's a memento from my first year,
**[18:05] Kanbaru**
when we made it to the nationals.
**[18:08] Kanbaru**
Turn it over, and look inside.
**[18:11] Kanbaru**
All of my teammates signed it.
**[18:15] Araragi**
Do you not understand the concept
of treasuring your memories?
**[18:19] Kanbaru**
My memories are always in my heart.
**[18:22] Araragi**
That's a great line, but...
**[18:23] Araragi**
Actually, I've only seen you play
**[18:28] Araragi**
in a single basketball game...
**[18:30] Araragi**
Hey, Kanbaru.
**[18:31] Araragi**
Would you put this on?
**[18:33] Kanbaru**
Sure.
**[18:35] Kanbaru**
I've grown out my hair, so I'll look
different than I did then.
**[18:39] Araragi**
Your hair grows awfully fast...
**[18:43] Kanbaru**
Yeah?
***SIGN*** No Entry
**[18:45] Araragi**
I've heard normal hair grows at
**[18:47] Araragi**
a rate of one centimeter per month.
**[18:50] Araragi**
But yours has grown at least five.
***SIGN*** No Entry
**[18:52] Kanbaru**
Well, I'm really erotic.
**[18:54] Koyomi**
She said it frankly!
**[18:56] Kanbaru**
That's right.
**[18:57] Kanbaru**
I'm so erotic,
**[18:57] Kanbaru**
I thought that "peperoncino"
**[19:00] Kanbaru**
was a dirty word for years.
**[19:02] Araragi**
You should have realized
that when you ate it!
**[19:03] Kanbaru**
I once misheard "family rate"
as "family rape."
***SIGN*** Family Rape
***SIGN*** Dangerous Object
**[19:08] Kanbaru**
I mean, I once misheard
"family rate" as "family hate."
***SIGN*** Family Hate
**[19:12] Araragi**
That doesn't really make it better!
**[19:14] Kanbaru**
And I remember recently thinking
**[19:18] Kanbaru**
"bracelet" meant "let's take a breath."
***SIGN*** Erotic
**[19:20] Araragi**
That isn't erotic at all.
It's just a misunderstanding!
**[19:23] Kanbaru**
"Bracelet,"
**[19:24] Kanbaru**
I said, rather than, "Don't worry,"
during matches,
**[19:27] Kanbaru**
getting really embarrassed.
**[19:29] Kanbaru**
I'll never forget my teammates'
stunned expressions.
**[19:33] Araragi**
Stop it...
**[19:34] Araragi**
That episode is too embarrassing!
**[19:38] Kanbaru**
Here... Well?
**[19:40] Kanbaru**
Something like this, Araragi-sempai?
**[19:44] Kanbaru**
When I wear this, I feel
the way I did back then.
**[19:47] Araragi**
*Back then?*
**[19:49] Araragi**
When you played basketball?
***SIGN*** No Entry
**[19:51] Kanbaru**
No, the naked team trip.
**[19:52] Araragi**
You're totally aware of it?!
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** The Glasses-Wearing Secretary
and the Glasses-Wearing Prince
**[19:56] Araragi**
We can throw this one out...
**[19:58] Araragi**
I guess it goes in the flammable trash.
**[20:00] Kanbaru**
Araragi-sempai,
**[20:01] Kanbaru**
that's flammable but it's not trash.
**[20:03] Kanbaru**
It may be rotten, but I need it.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[20:08] Araragi**
But all of these look the same...
**[20:12] Araragi**
Can you tell the difference
when you read them?
**[20:14] Kanbaru**
Of course.
***SIGN*** Watch for Falling Books
**[20:16] Kanbaru**
Any time one isn't familiar with something,
it all looks the same.
**[20:19] Kanbaru**
Knowledge and education
**[20:21] Kanbaru**
are required to properly judge a thing.
**[20:23] Araragi**
I see.
**[20:24] Araragi**
But even still...
***SIGN*** The Glasses-Wearing Secretary and the Glasses-Wearing Prince
***SIGN*** The Glasses-Wearing Secretary and the Glasses-Wearing Prince
***SIGN*** The Glasses-Wearing Secretary and the Glasses-Wearing Prince
**[20:28] Araragi**
I guess they're all handsome.
**[20:31] Araragi**
I was just thinking you like 'em handsome...
**[20:35] Araragi**
Maybe you aren't really a big pervert.
**[20:39] Araragi**
Don't all girls like handsome guys?
**[20:43] Araragi**
So it's natural to enjoy seeing
handsome guys together.
**[20:46] Araragi**
It's basically like an idol group, right?
**[20:50] Kanbaru**
P-Please don't use simplified examples!
**[20:53] Araragi**
It's not as though you only like guys
who weigh more than 150 kg,
**[20:56] Araragi**
or are turned on by the smell of old men.
**[20:59] Kanbaru**
U-Um, well...
**[21:02] Kanbaru**
If you say that to me,
there's nothing else I can do...
**[21:06] Kanbaru**
I'll strip!
**[21:07] Kanbaru**
I'll strip right now.
**[21:08] Araragi**
No, no, no, no.
**[21:09] Araragi**
When you think about it,
being underdressed
**[21:12] Araragi**
at home is actually pretty normal...
**[21:14] Araragi**
And even outside, it's only in a bath, right?
**[21:16] Araragi**
I'm sorry for all the things I've said.
**[21:18] Kanbaru**
I don't want you to apologize!
**[21:20] Kanbaru**
Araragi-sempai,
**[21:22] Kanbaru**
listen to what I have to say.
**[21:23] Araragi**
And as you, yourself, said on the phone,
**[21:27] Araragi**
maybe I'm the bigger pervert...
***SIGN*** She fell into complete disarray.
**[21:32] Kanbaru**
That's... No!
**[21:33] Kanbaru**
I just happened to have a lot of
books like that around there!
**[21:37] Kanbaru**
There's harder BL on a lower stratum!
**[21:40] Kanbaru**
I know that BL is more than
just handsome guys!
**[21:43] Kanbaru**
Keep looking!
**[21:45] Araragi**
Come on, Kanbaru.
**[21:47] Araragi**
If you actually have to look for it,
it isn't really you...
**[21:53] Kanbaru**
Now I have no choice but
to prove my innocence...
**[22:00] Kanbaru**
Araragi-sempai, prepare yourself!
**[22:02] Araragi**
Prepare myself for what?
**[22:02] Kanbaru**
Don't worry...
**[22:04] Kanbaru**
It only hurts at first.
**[22:05] Kanbaru**
It'll feel good soon.
***SIGN*** Pedestrian
***SIGN*** Construction
**[22:11] Kanbaru**
You have a pretty nice body yourself.
**[22:14] Kanbaru**
I like these muscles.
**[22:16] Kanbaru**
They feel great to touch!
**[22:20] Kanbaru**
Stop struggling...
**[22:22] Kanbaru**
It makes it harder to remove your underwear!
**[22:26] Araragi**
I swore then that
**[22:28] Araragi**
no matter when or how I
encountered Hachikuji,
**[22:31] Araragi**
I would never open the conversation
**[22:37] Araragi**
with sexual harassment.
# E3 - Karen Bee, Part Three
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRDQVDQWY/karen-bee-part-3)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Araragi**
It's starting to look a little better.
**[00:06] Araragi**
Want to take a break?
**[00:08] Kanbaru**
Yeah, let's!
**[00:10] Kanbaru**
Your cleaning skills are amazing.
**[00:14] Kanbaru**
Perhaps I make my room messy
**[00:17] Kanbaru**
just so I can see your skill.
**[00:19] Araragi**
That'd be a pain, so cut it out.
**[00:21] Kanbaru**
You'll make a great wife.
**[00:23] Araragi**
I don't want to be a wife!
**[00:25] Kanbaru**
I'd almost want you as my wife...
**[00:27] Araragi**
No,
**[00:28] Araragi**
I wouldn't want you for a husband.
**[00:30] Kanbaru**
Then you'll marry me?
**[00:32] Araragi**
If our positions were reversed.
**[00:34] Araragi**
But either way, Senjougahara would kill you.
**[00:37] Araragi**
Well, she'd probably kill me, too.
**[00:40] Kanbaru**
But you know, Araragi-sempai...
**[00:42] Kanbaru**
You and Senjougahara-sempai
**[00:43] Kanbaru**
make a good couple.
**[00:47] Kanbaru**
However,
**[00:48] Kanbaru**
I think you'll end up marrying
Hanekawa-sempai.
**[00:51] Araragi**
Don't say that!
**[00:53] Kanbaru**
And you'll have me for a lover,
***SIGN*** Koyomi Tsubasa
***SIGN*** Suruga
***SIGN*** Nadeko
**[00:55] Kanbaru**
and maybe Sengoku-chan as your #3?
***SIGN*** Koyomi Suruga
**[00:57] Araragi**
*Following that logic,*
***SIGN*** Nadeko
***SIGN*** Tsubasa
***SIGN*** Mayoi
**[00:59] Araragi**
*I'm really in love with Hachikuji.*
**[01:00] Araragi**
Th-That isn't true...
**[01:02] Araragi**
I'm marrying Senjougahara someday.
***SIGN*** Cold Sweat
**[01:07] Kanbaru**
I don't know what to say
**[01:10] Kanbaru**
about your dream proposal.
**[01:13] Kanbaru**
But still, Araragi-sempai,
**[01:15] Kanbaru**
if I really pursued you, you couldn't refuse.
**[01:19] Araragi**
T-To marry?
**[01:21] Kanbaru**
Nope.
**[01:23] Kanbaru**
To be your mistress!
**[01:25] Araragi**
I would refuse!
**[01:28] Kanbaru**
It's easy for girls to
**[01:30] Kanbaru**
take advantage of your kindness,
so be careful.
**[01:33] Kanbaru**
That's what I mean.
**[01:34] Kanbaru**
For now, that's all it is.
**[01:37] Kanbaru**
I like our current relationship.
**[01:39] Kanbaru**
I wouldn't do anything to endanger it.
**[01:41] Kanbaru**
But should you ever do anything to
hurt Senjougahara-sempai,
**[01:46] Kanbaru**
I'm certain I would...
**[01:51] Araragi**
Actually, if I married Hanekawa,
**[01:55] Araragi**
wouldn't Senjougahara kill her, too?
**[01:58] Araragi**
I wouldn't want that.
**[02:00] Araragi**
Didn't I tell you?
**[02:01] Araragi**
I'm more grateful to Hanekawa
than to anyone else.
**[02:04] Kanbaru**
Well...
**[02:06] Kanbaru**
Hanekawa-sempai...
**[02:08] Kanbaru**
Hanekawa-sempai and
Senjougahara-sempai...
**[02:12] Kanbaru**
Well, I don't think you should
worry about that relationship.
**[02:15] Araragi**
What?
**[02:16] Kanbaru**
They have their own little world, you know.
**[02:21] Kanbaru**
I'm not terribly pleased about it.
**[02:24] Kanbaru**
But since those two are happy with it,
**[02:26] Kanbaru**
it isn't my place to say anything.
**[02:31] Araragi**
Oh, Kanbaru...
**[02:33] Araragi**
Wanna play this, while we take a break?
**[02:35] Kanbaru**
Oh, Hanafuda!
***SIGN*** Shishinden
**[02:37] Kanbaru**
I forgot I had that.
**[02:39] Kanbaru**
But I don't know the rules.
**[02:41] Kanbaru**
I just bought it on a whim,
at a department store.
**[02:44] Araragi**
Oh, I see...
**[02:46] Araragi**
Then we can't play.
**[02:47] Kanbaru**
No, that's not true, Araragi-sempai.
**[02:50] Kanbaru**
If you teach me, I can play!
**[02:52] Kanbaru**
It may surprise you,
**[02:54] Kanbaru**
but I'm good at learning
the rules to games.
**[02:59] Kanbaru**
What's wrong, Araragi-sempai?
**[03:01] Kanbaru**
This round, you're the parent.
**[03:03] Araragi**
Sorry...
**[03:04] Araragi**
I've got a four-hand.
**[03:05] Araragi**
That's six points.
***SIGN*** Koyomi Suruga
**[03:09] Araragi**
So, yeah...
**[03:11] Araragi**
That was a rare hand, so let's end it here.
**[03:13] Kanbaru**
Wait! Grr...
**[03:15] Kanbaru**
We still have one match left.
**[03:17] Araragi**
Don't get so mad...
**[03:19] Araragi**
Bracelet! Bracelet!
**[03:21] Araragi**
It's just a game.
**[03:22] Kanbaru**
How can you win without
even taking it seriously?!
**[03:25] Araragi**
But I am winning.
**[03:28] Araragi**
It's just a game.
**[03:30] Araragi**
You should enjoy it...
**[03:32] Araragi**
For example, look at Sengoku.
**[03:34] Araragi**
She taught me something called "Twister."
**[03:37] Araragi**
She lost to a total newbie like me,
**[03:39] Araragi**
but she still seemed really happy.
**[03:41] Kanbaru**
Araragi-sempai,
**[03:42] Kanbaru**
it seems you've not yet recognized
**[03:45] Kanbaru**
the true final boss's existence.
**[03:47] Araragi**
What are you talking about?
**[03:49] Kanbaru**
Nothing.
**[03:50] Kanbaru**
It's not for me to say anything.
**[04:00] Araragi**
Kanbaru?
**[04:01] Kanbaru**
What is it, Araragi-sempai?
**[04:03] Araragi**
We should decide a punishment game first.
**[04:05] Kanbaru**
You're certainly in a hurry.
**[04:06] Kanbaru**
And I intend to ask for a sexual pact...
**[04:09] Kanbaru**
I mean, sexual act.
**[04:12] Araragi**
I see.
**[04:12] Araragi**
You can order me to die, if you want.
**[04:14] Araragi**
Never, ever, start gambling!
***SIGN*** Episode 3: Karen Bee, Part 3
**[05:53] Araragi**
I asked Kanbaru about something
I'd been wondering...
**[05:57] Araragi**
What she tells her family
**[05:59] Araragi**
about her left arm.
**[06:02] Kanbaru**
I tell them it's injured.
**[06:04] Kanbaru**
I don't think it's something
I could really explain.
**[06:08] Araragi**
But does that work?
**[06:10] Araragi**
Unlike my vampirism,
**[06:12] Araragi**
your left arm is something they can see.
**[06:16] Kanbaru**
Well, my grandma and grandpa
**[06:19] Kanbaru**
do worry about me, naturally.
**[06:22] Kanbaru**
But despite everything,
what happened with
**[06:25] Kanbaru**
my mother puts a wall
between me and them.
**[06:27] Kanbaru**
So they never ask anything
**[06:31] Kanbaru**
I wouldn't want them to ask.
**[06:37] Kanbaru**
Either way, I only have to tolerate it
**[06:39] Kanbaru**
for a few more years.
**[06:53] Kaiki**
Are you a child from this household?
**[06:55] Araragi**
No...
**[06:58] Araragi**
Actually, I'm not.
**[07:03] Kaiki**
I apologize.
**[07:05] Kaiki**
I haven't introduced myself.
**[07:07] Kaiki**
The caution you've shown a total stranger
is extremely appropriate.
**[07:11] Kaiki**
Treasure it.
**[07:14] Kaiki**
My name is Kaiki.
**[07:16] Araragi**
Kaiki?
**[07:17] Kaiki**
Yes.
**[07:18] Kaiki**
"Kai," like a mound of clamshells.
**[07:19] Kaiki**
"Ki," like a dead tree.
**[07:23] Araragi**
My name is Araragi.
**[07:26] Araragi**
The kanji are, uh...
**[07:27] Kaiki**
No need to explain.
**[07:30] Kaiki**
It's a name I just heard said.
**[07:37] Kaiki**
But I suppose if I'm a dead tree,
**[07:40] Kaiki**
you must be a sapling.
**[07:44] Araragi**
Well, if you need something
at Kanbaru's place...
**[07:49] Kaiki**
You're polite, for a child these days.
**[07:53] Kaiki**
And kind, too. Interesting.
**[07:57] Kaiki**
But your kindness is wasted on me.
**[08:01] Kaiki**
And I've no particular business
with this household.
**[08:04] Kaiki**
However...
**[08:06] Kaiki**
I'd heard that the Gaen child lived here.
**[08:12] Kaiki**
I haven't anything to do here,
but I thought I might take a look.
**[08:15] Kaiki**
That's all.
**[08:17] Araragi**
Gaen?
**[08:18] Araragi**
*Isn't that the maiden name
of Kanbaru's mother?*
**[08:21] Araragi**
*Then her child would be Kanbaru Suruga?*
**[08:28] Kaiki**
But I've wasted my time.
**[08:31] Kaiki**
I hardly feel any aura at all.
**[08:33] Kaiki**
One-third, I'd say...
**[08:36] Kaiki**
It won't cause problems if I ignore it.
**[08:39] Kaiki**
No, I have no choice but to ignore it.
**[08:41] Kaiki**
Unfortunately, there's no money to be made.
**[08:46] Kaiki**
The lesson for me here is that
**[08:50] Kaiki**
even if the truth is as one suspects,
**[08:53] Kaiki**
it may still be worthless.
**[09:02] Araragi**
Um...
**[09:09] Araragi**
No...
**[09:10] Araragi**
He's totally different from
that slacker, Oshino.
**[09:14] Araragi**
He was more like Guillotine Cutter.
**[09:18] Araragi**
Well, both Oshino and Guillotine Cutter
**[09:21] Araragi**
were totally different types, but...
**[09:26] Araragi**
I'll follow him.
**[09:34] Araragi**
*Maybe it's intuition,*
**[09:36] Araragi**
*but I have a feeling that it's a bad
idea to get involved with him.*
**[09:40] Araragi**
*Those strange, depressing funeral clothes.*
**[09:43] Araragi**
*But there was something far beyond that...*
**[09:46] Araragi**
*Something ominous.*
**[09:48] Araragi**
*Ominous...*
**[09:49] Araragi**
*And threatening.*
***SIGN*** A Threat
**[10:01] Araragi**
Hey! Senjougahara!
**[10:09] Araragi**
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
**[10:14] Araragi**
Don't do things that will seriously depress me!
***SIGN*** No Entry
**[10:22] Araragi**
Hey, Senjougahara.
**[10:25] Senjougahara**
I don't know any boy who'd
neglect his studies,
**[10:29] Senjougahara**
to wander around here.
**[10:30] Araragi**
Well... Y-You've misunderstood.
**[10:34] Senjougahara**
Silence. I most certainly have not.
**[10:37] Senjougahara**
Running from my tutelage is one thing,
but to run from Hanekawa-san's,
**[10:41] Senjougahara**
you must be a true coward.
**[10:43] Senjougahara**
I'm disappointed in you.
**[10:44] Araragi**
No, no.
**[10:45] Araragi**
Hanekawa's busy today,
and couldn't make it.
**[10:48] Senjougahara**
I'm tired of excuses, incompetent fool.
**[10:51] Senjougahara**
In the end, you're all talk, Araragi-kun.
**[10:55] Senjougahara**
The fact that a man like you won my heart
**[10:58] Senjougahara**
will shame me for the rest of my life.
**[11:00] Araragi**
You say things that would drive
any other man to suicide,
**[11:03] Araragi**
all like it's nothing, you know?
**[11:05] Senjougahara**
Insect.
**[11:15] Araragi**
Gahara-san! Gahara-san!
**[11:16] Senjougahara**
What is it, Churaragi-kun.
**[11:18] Araragi**
Don't say my name like an obscure
regional Okinawa word!
**[11:21] Araragi**
My name is Araragi!
**[11:23] Araragi**
And that's Hachikuji's gag!
**[11:26] Senjougahara**
Sorry! I bit my tongue.
**[11:27] Araragi**
No, you did it deliberately.
**[11:29] Senjougahara**
I bit my tongue, and you can die.
**[11:30] Araragi**
She really did do it deliberately!
**[11:32] Senjougahara**
Don't get the wrong idea.
**[11:33] Senjougahara**
I actually hate human garbage like you.
**[11:38] Araragi**
Are you just taking advantage
of your tsundere status
**[11:41] Araragi**
to say what you really think?!
**[11:43] Senjougahara**
But they say a woman's better off
**[11:46] Senjougahara**
with an unloved man,
versus a man who loves.
**[11:49] Araragi**
That isn't quite right!
***SIGN*** An Unloved Man
**[11:50] Senjougahara**
It's a joke.
**[11:52] Senjougahara**
Everyone loves you,
and you're super-popular.
***SIGN*** Watch your head.
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
***SIGN*** Danger
**[12:05] Senjougahara**
Stare.
**[12:06] Senjougahara**
Three. Or maybe it's five?
**[12:09] Araragi**
Wh-What's that?
**[12:11] Senjougahara**
The number of girls you've
played with today.
***SIGN*** One
***SIGN*** Two
***SIGN*** Three
***SIGN*** Four
***SIGN*** Five
**[12:19] Senjougahara**
Six, to be completely accurate.
***SIGN*** Six
***SIGN*** Grandma
**[12:23] Senjougahara**
So, with that in the open,
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
***SIGN*** Danger
**[12:26] Senjougahara**
everyone loves you,
and you're super-popular.
**[12:35] Senjougahara**
Don't worry, Araragi-san.
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
***SIGN*** Danger
**[12:38] Senjougahara**
I may not seem it,
**[12:39] Senjougahara**
but I'm quite tolerant regarding adultery.
**[12:42] Araragi**
I'm not committing adultery.
**[12:43] Araragi**
I'm not even engaging in the "adult" part.
**[12:46] Senjougahara**
So regardless of what you play, with whom,
**[12:49] Senjougahara**
that is your choice.
**[12:52] Senjougahara**
But if any of it ever gets the
slightest bit serious,
**[12:55] Senjougahara**
I'll kill you.
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
***SIGN*** Danger
**[12:59] Senjougahara**
Don't worry.
**[13:00] Senjougahara**
I won't let you die alone.
**[13:03] Senjougahara**
I'll send the other woman
right after you.
**[13:06] Araragi**
Why don't you just die, too?
**[13:07] Senjougahara**
Then I'll send Kanbaru,
so you don't get lonely!
**[13:11] Araragi**
What do you think Kanbaru is?
**[13:13] Senjougahara**
An underclassman I can
use however I like.
**[13:14] Araragi**
A cruel definition,
stated without hesitation!
**[13:16] Senjougahara**
A joke.
**[13:17] Senjougahara**
Kanbaru is a cute little underclassman.
**[13:19] Senjougahara**
And I don't believe in life
after death at all.
**[13:24] Araragi**
I see...
**[13:26] Senjougahara**
I just wanted you to understand that
**[13:29] Senjougahara**
this is what it means to date me.
**[13:33] Araragi**
I get it.
**[13:34] Araragi**
I wouldn't cheat, anyway.
**[13:36] Senjougahara**
Okay.
**[13:38] Senjougahara**
Very well, then.
**[13:39] Senjougahara**
As long as you don't forget
to whom you belong,
**[13:43] Senjougahara**
that's fine.
**[13:45] Senjougahara**
I put a decent amount of effort
into being your woman.
**[13:50] Senjougahara**
If possible, I'd like you to do the same.
**[13:54] Araragi**
Effort, huh?
**[13:56] Araragi**
I am...
**[13:57] Araragi**
I've never forgotten to whom I belong.
**[14:00] Senjougahara**
I see...
**[14:04] Senjougahara**
By the way, Araragi-kun,
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[14:05] Senjougahara**
that said, I'd like to be certain
that you know this...
**[14:11] Senjougahara**
Speaking as a girlfriend,
it's actually quite wonderful
**[14:15] Senjougahara**
to have such a popular boyfriend.
**[14:17] Araragi**
Too close to what she's really thinking!
**[14:21] Araragi**
Are you going somewhere?
**[14:23] Senjougahara**
I finished my shopping, and I'm heading home.
**[14:26] Senjougahara**
Speaking of which, what are
you doing out here?
**[14:29] Senjougahara**
This isn't your normal territory.
**[14:31] Araragi**
Can't you tell?
**[14:33] Senjougahara**
Unfortunately, I've never studied the
actions of microscopic organisms.
**[14:38] Senjougahara**
But if I had to guess regardless,
given what I know about you,
**[14:41] Senjougahara**
I'd say you're returning from
some misdemeanor.
**[14:44] Araragi**
Do you think I just go out
and commit misdemeanors?
**[14:47] Araragi**
I'm on my way back from Kanbaru's.
**[14:50] Senjougahara**
I see.
**[14:50] Senjougahara**
You were committing
misdemeanors at Kanbaru's.
**[14:52] Araragi**
I was not!
**[14:53] Senjougahara**
Oh?
**[14:54] Senjougahara**
I thought you saw Kanbaru naked.
**[14:57] Araragi**
I... I did not!
**[14:58] Araragi**
*At least, not from the front.*
**[15:01] Araragi**
*I simply thought a minor detail
like that wasn't worth sharing.*
**[15:05] Araragi**
Come to think of it,
**[15:07] Araragi**
I saw a weird guy in front
of Kanbaru's house.
**[15:09] Senjougahara**
Oh?
**[15:10] Senjougahara**
When did they hang a mirror
in front of Kanbaru's house?
**[15:13] Araragi**
He was strange...
**[15:15] Araragi**
Kind of ill-omened.
**[15:18] Senjougahara**
Ill-omened?
**[15:19] Araragi**
His name was...
**[15:22] Araragi**
Kaiki?
**[15:24] Araragi**
Was that it?
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** Five
***SIGN*** Four
***SIGN*** Three
***SIGN*** Two
***SIGN*** One
***SIGN*** 7/30 Early Morning
**[15:40] Araragi**
Do you know this Kaiki guy?
**[15:53] Senjougahara**
I'd prefer that you not ask.
**[15:56] Araragi**
If I shouldn't, then I won't.
**[15:58] Araragi**
But that isn't really the case, is it?
**[16:00] Araragi**
If you have to do all this...
**[16:04] Araragi**
*It was just to protect me.*
**[16:05] Araragi**
*Senjougahara kidnapped me*
**[16:08] Araragi**
*in order to protect me.*
**[16:14] Araragi**
For you to go to these lengths,
**[16:16] Araragi**
it must be a big deal.
**[16:17] Senjougahara**
You think so?
**[16:18] Senjougahara**
Personally, I'd say that it's likely
**[16:21] Senjougahara**
that I'd kidnap you, with even
the slightest of pretexts.
**[16:25] Araragi**
Yeah...
**[16:31] Senjougahara**
Kaiki Deishuu.
**[16:34] Senjougahara**
That's his name.
**[16:36] Senjougahara**
Kaiki is an uncommon name.
**[16:38] Senjougahara**
And if you saw him and "ill-omened"
sprang to mind, that's him.
**[16:41] Senjougahara**
I know no other man who suits
**[16:43] Senjougahara**
that term so well.
**[16:46] Senjougahara**
Yes,
**[16:47] Senjougahara**
just as you know nothing at all...
**[16:51] Senjougahara**
I hadn't imagined he'd
return to this town...
**[16:54] Senjougahara**
Surprising, inexplicable...
**[16:56] Senjougahara**
Honestly, I didn't expect it in the slightest.
**[16:58] Araragi**
What's he like?
**[17:00] Araragi**
It's unusual for you to have such antipathy
**[17:02] Senjougahara**
for someone.
**[17:05] Senjougahara**
Kaiki is a fraud.
**[17:09] Senjougahara**
You and Oshino-san solved my problem,
**[17:13] Senjougahara**
if you recall?
**[17:18] Araragi**
Yeah.
**[17:19] Senjougahara**
And did I not tell you?
**[17:21] Senjougahara**
How, before you introduced
me to Oshino-san,
**[17:24] Senjougahara**
I met with five con men.
***SIGN*** Three Four Two One Five
**[17:28] Senjougahara**
Kaiki was one of them.
**[17:30] Senjougahara**
The first.
**[17:32] Araragi**
*I understand.*
**[17:33] Araragi**
*His feel was akin to that of Oshino
and Guillotine Cutter.*
**[17:37] Araragi**
*Those two are similar by virtue of their
expertise in the supernatural.*
**[17:41] Araragi**
*And Kaiki...*
**[17:42] Araragi**
*Kaiki Deishuu is just like them.*
**[17:46] Araragi**
Regardless of whether he's
for real or a fake...
**[17:49] Senjougahara**
He's a fake,
**[17:50] Senjougahara**
but he's a master con man.
**[17:53] Senjougahara**
My entire family and I have
suffered greatly at his hands.
**[17:57] Senjougahara**
He did a few tricks, took our money,
**[18:00] Senjougahara**
and vanished without helping at all.
**[18:03] Senjougahara**
But that's a minor issue.
**[18:07] Araragi**
So, what isn't minor?
**[18:10] Senjougahara**
I do not
**[18:11] Senjougahara**
want you involved with him.
**[18:15] Senjougahara**
That's all.
**[18:17] Senjougahara**
I will no longer relinquish that
which is important to me.
**[18:20] Senjougahara**
I won't lose anything else.
**[18:21] Senjougahara**
Therefore,
**[18:23] Senjougahara**
I am going to protect you, Araragi-kun.
**[18:31] Araragi**
Is this Kaiki that much of a problem?
**[18:35] Araragi**
Why do you want me to keep away?
**[18:37] Senjougahara**
Hmm...
**[18:38] Senjougahara**
He's too much for a man
of justice like yourself.
**[18:41] Araragi**
A man of justice?
**[18:43] Araragi**
*I'm not one of the Fire Sisters.*
**[18:45] Senjougahara**
Until I know at least what he's after,
**[18:49] Senjougahara**
why he's returned,
**[18:52] Senjougahara**
I'd like you to please remain here.
**[18:57] Senjougahara**
No.
**[18:58] Senjougahara**
Even if he isn't here for any specific reason,
**[19:01] Senjougahara**
I'd like you to stay here until he leaves.
**[19:05] Araragi**
What if he moves here?
**[19:09] Senjougahara**
If he moves here...
**[19:12] Senjougahara**
Then you'll have to spend the rest
of your life in this room.
**[19:14] Araragi**
Hey, Gahara-san!
**[19:15] Senjougahara**
Or...
**[19:17] Senjougahara**
I could kill Kaiki.
**[19:18] Araragi**
Wait.
**[19:19] Senjougahara**
I know. I'll go "click" on him.
**[19:22] Araragi**
"Click"?
**[19:23] Araragi**
Cute sounds do not make it okay!
***SIGN*** Not Okay
**[19:25] Araragi**
And it isn't okay!
**[19:26] Araragi**
Anyway, what is this Kaiki guy...
**[19:31] Araragi**
Can I look at that?
**[19:45] Araragi**
Wait, you're groping around too much!
**[19:47] Araragi**
Where are you touching me?
**[19:49] Senjougahara**
It's hard to reach, deep in your pocket.
**[19:51] Araragi**
My pockets aren't that deep.
**[19:53] Senjougahara**
I see.
**[19:54] Senjougahara**
Neither your life nor your pockets
are that deep, right?
**[19:56] Senjougahara**
Do you have to hurt me,
to find my cell phone?
***SIGN*** From: Younger Little Sister Subject: Help Me
**[20:12] Senjougahara**
Araragi-kun?
**[20:18] Senjougahara**
Where are you going?
**[20:21] Araragi**
I've got somewhere to be.
**[20:23] Araragi**
That's enough playing around.
**[20:24] Araragi**
Sorry, but I'm going home.
**[20:26] Senjougahara**
Do you think you can?
**[20:28] Araragi**
I do. It's my home.
**[20:30] Araragi**
*And my family.*
***SIGN*** Koyomi Voice /Dialogue
**[20:32] Senjougahara**
Just so we're clear,
**[20:34] Senjougahara**
I'm not such a coward that I'd hesitate
because I'm facing a vampire.
**[20:38] Senjougahara**
Nor kind enough to hesitate
because I'm facing my lover.
**[20:42] Araragi**
I know that.
**[20:45] Araragi**
It's why I like you.
**[20:48] Senjougahara**
If you want to get past me,
you'll have to defeat me.
**[20:52] Senjougahara**
Can you do that?
**[20:54] Araragi**
I can.
**[20:55] Araragi**
Those lines don't work
unless they're said together.
**[20:58] Araragi**
Just as you claim to wish to protect me,
**[21:01] Araragi**
I have something I want to protect.
**[21:03] Senjougahara**
Do you expect those words
to convince me?
**[21:06] Araragi**
They don't need to, right?
**[21:08] Senjougahara**
I don't know about that.
**[21:10] Senjougahara**
I'd prefer that you not consider me to be
the understanding type of woman.
**[21:14] Araragi**
But, Senjougahara...
**[21:16] Araragi**
Then when you fell in love,
what did you like about me?
**[21:19] Araragi**
Can you boldly claim to love me,
even if I do nothing here?
**[21:22] Senjougahara**
Oh, no.
**[21:24] Senjougahara**
That's really cool.
**[21:25] Senjougahara**
If I were a man, I'd love you.
**[21:28] Araragi**
Stay a woman, and love me anyway!
**[21:30] Senjougahara**
I do.
**[21:37] Senjougahara**
Hello?
**[21:39] Senjougahara**
I'm busy right now.
**[21:43] Senjougahara**
N-No...
**[21:46] Senjougahara**
That's a misunderstanding...
**[21:47] Senjougahara**
I never said a word about that.
**[21:50] Senjougahara**
Wait a second...
**[21:51] Senjougahara**
You don't have to do that.
**[21:53] Senjougahara**
That wasn't the deal.
**[21:54] Senjougahara**
Stop, please...
**[21:55] Senjougahara**
Give me some time.
**[21:59] Senjougahara**
All right.
**[22:01] Senjougahara**
I'll do everything you say.
**[22:10] Senjougahara**
You can go home, Araragi-kun.
**[22:14] Senjougahara**
Are you sure?
**[22:16] Senjougahara**
I'm sure.
**[22:17] Senjougahara**
A-And Araragi-kun...
**[22:19] Senjougahara**
Well, you know...
**[22:23] Senjougahara**
I'm s-sorr... I'm sorry...
**[22:30] Senjougahara**
Hey, Gahara-san?
**[22:32] Senjougahara**
Who were you talking to, by the way?
***SIGN*** White Scene
**[22:37] Senjougahara**
To be continued.
**[22:38] Senjougahara**
Hanekawa-san.
***SIGN***
# E4 - Karen Bee, Part Four
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G65VJKV56/karen-bee-part-4)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Karen**
I'm right!
**[00:07] Tsukihi**
Karen-chan...
**[00:08] Koyomi**
For now, just tell me what happened.
**[00:11] Koyomi**
Weren't you going to have a heroic tale for me?
**[00:15] Koyomi**
I'll ask once more, bigger little sister...
**[00:17] Koyomi**
Tell me what happened.
**[00:19] Karen**
Nope!
**[00:24] Hanekawa**
Araragi-kun?
**[00:26] Hanekawa**
Araragi-kun, you were really upset when
**[00:30] Hanekawa**
my father hit me, right?
**[00:32] Hanekawa**
So why are you about to hit your little sister?
**[00:37] Hanekawa**
I think physical punishment is
**[00:39] Hanekawa**
appropriate to some circumstances.
**[00:42] Hanekawa**
If you can give some reason,
**[00:43] Hanekawa**
which will satisfy Karen-chan,
**[00:46] Hanekawa**
even after you've hit her,
**[00:48] Hanekawa**
then it's all right.
**[00:50] Koyomi**
I'm sorry.
**[00:51] Hanekawa**
Why are you apologizing to me?
**[00:54] Koyomi**
I'm very sorry.
**[00:55] Koyomi**
I got too emotional.
**[00:56] Karen**
Hey, Tsubasa-san,
**[00:57] Karen**
don't be mad at my brother.
**[00:59] Karen**
This one was my fault.
**[01:02] Karen**
And if he'd hit me, I would've hit him back.
**[01:05] Hanekawa**
I see.
**[01:06] Hanekawa**
Then I guess my help wasn't needed.
**[01:08] Karen**
That's right, Tsubasa-san.
**[01:10] Hanekawa**
But I don't think you'd have
been able to hit him back.
**[01:13] Karen**
If not, I'd have bitten him.
**[01:16] Karen**
You don't know how strong my teeth are.
**[01:19] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan, don't be mad, okay?
**[01:23] Tsukihi**
Hanekawa-san is
**[01:24] Tsukihi**
helping the Fire Sisters with this...
**[01:27] Koyomi**
I'm very mad!
**[01:28] Hanekawa**
Araragi-kun, keep it down.
**[01:32] Hanekawa**
You'll wake up your parents.
**[01:34] Hanekawa**
And I didn't realize
**[01:35] Hanekawa**
you yelled at your sisters that way.
**[01:38] Hanekawa**
I'm surprised.
***SIGN*** They're pretending to be good in front of Hanekawa.
**[01:40] Koyomi**
*This is really hard!*
**[01:41] Tsukihi**
Hanekawa-san, don't get mad at Onii-chan.
**[01:45] Tsukihi**
He's just worried that we're
**[01:49] Tsukihi**
causing trouble for you.
**[01:50] Koyomi**
Jeez.
**[01:51] Hanekawa**
Araragi-kun,
**[01:53] Hanekawa**
I'm cooperating with Karen-chan and Tsukihi-chan
**[01:55] Hanekawa**
of my own free will.
**[01:57] Hanekawa**
So don't blame them.
**[01:59] Hanekawa**
The Araragi-kun I know wouldn't get
**[02:01] Hanekawa**
angry with his sisters for no reason, would he?
**[02:07] Koyomi**
Okay, okay.
**[02:09] Koyomi**
I won't get mad.
**[02:10] Koyomi**
I promise.
**[02:10] Karen**
And you won't tell Mom and Dad?
**[02:13] Koyomi**
I won't.
**[02:14] Koyomi**
So explain. What was the big deal,
**[02:16] Koyomi**
and what happened after that?
**[02:18] Karen**
Hmm, what happened then, I wonder...
**[02:22] Koyomi**
Hanekawa, would you go to
my room for a second?
**[02:25] Karen**
Nii-chan is trying to get
Tsubasa-san into his room!
***SIGN*** I will kill you someday.
**[02:30] Hanekawa**
All right. Let's go.
**[02:32] Hanekawa**
It's okay, Karen-chan... Tsukihi-chan.
**[02:35] Hanekawa**
You did the right thing.
**[02:38] Hanekawa**
Once he talks to me,
I'm sure he'll understand.
**[02:41] Hanekawa**
I'll tell him everything, so don't worry.
**[02:43] Both Hanekawas**
Tsubasa-san!
Hanekawa-san!
**[02:47] Hanekawa**
I trust your brother.
**[02:55] Koyomi**
Hey, big one.
**[02:57] Karen**
What is it, little one?
**[02:59] Koyomi**
You're probably right.
**[03:01] Koyomi**
You always are.
**[03:03] Koyomi**
I won't deny that.
**[03:04] Koyomi**
But that's all you are.
**[03:07] Koyomi**
You're never strong.
**[03:09] Koyomi**
And if you're not strong, you'll lose.
**[03:11] Koyomi**
You do enough martial arts to know that.
**[03:15] Koyomi**
The first requirement of being
a hero isn't being right.
**[03:18] Koyomi**
It's being strong.
**[03:20] Koyomi**
That's why the hero always wins.
**[03:22] Koyomi**
You need to learn that.
**[03:24] Koyomi**
Until you do, what you're doing is just a game.
**[03:29] Koyomi**
And you'll only be fakes.
***SIGN*** Episode 4: Karen Bee, Part 4
**[03:43] Hanekawa**
It's kind of different...
**[03:45] Hanekawa**
The way you worry about your sisters,
**[03:49] Hanekawa**
or Senjougahara-san,
**[03:51] Hanekawa**
or Mayoi-chan,
**[03:52] Hanekawa**
or Kanbaru-san,
**[03:53] Hanekawa**
or Sengoku-chan, is totally different
**[03:56] ---**
than how you worry about me.
**[03:57] Hanekawa**
I don't know how to explain it.
**[03:59] Hanekawa**
It feels more desperate.
**[04:01] Koyomi**
Desperate?
**[04:02] Hanekawa**
It's like a totally different personality.
**[04:07] Hanekawa**
You were pretty hard
**[04:09] Hanekawa**
on them back there, weren't you?
**[04:11] Hanekawa**
"You're only right,
you aren't strong."
**[04:13] Hanekawa**
It sounded like
**[04:14] Hanekawa**
you were telling yourself that, too.
**[04:17] Koyomi**
You're saying they bother me because
I have the same problem?
**[04:19] Hanekawa**
I'm sure this isn't what you want to hear.
**[04:22] Hanekawa**
But I think it's more like
**[04:26] Hanekawa**
you bother yourself.
**[04:27] Koyomi**
Hanekawa, you've only known them for
**[04:30] Koyomi**
a month or so, so you might not understand.
**[04:35] Koyomi**
But I've lived with Karen-chan
for fifteen years,
**[04:37] Koyomi**
and Tsukihi-chan for fourteen.
**[04:40] Koyomi**
And from that experience, I can tell you...
**[04:44] Koyomi**
Hanekawa?
**[04:46] Hanekawa**
Sorry, sorry.
**[04:47] Hanekawa**
But you call them "-chan," huh?
**[04:52] Koyomi**
B-Big mistake!
**[04:56] Hanekawa**
Don't worry about it.
**[04:58] Hanekawa**
I call them that, too.
**[05:01] Koyomi**
I-It isn't like that.
**[05:02] Koyomi**
I was just, you know,
imitating how you talk...
**[05:06] Koyomi**
That's right.
**[05:07] Koyomi**
It's a type of rhetorical trick,
**[05:09] Koyomi**
and normally, I don't...
**[05:13] Koyomi**
Th-That aside.
**[05:16] Koyomi**
Let's get to the point, Hanekawa.
**[05:18] Koyomi**
We might not have much time.
**[05:20] Hanekawa**
That's true...
**[05:23] Koyomi**
But I at least know the beginning, right?
**[05:27] Koyomi**
They were looking for the source of the charm
**[05:30] Koyomi**
that's circulating among the middle school kids.
**[05:32] Hanekawa**
Huh? How did you know?
**[05:34] Koyomi**
Sengoku told me.
**[05:36] Koyomi**
Unfortunately, my little sisters...
**[05:38] Hanekawa**
Karen-chan and Tsukihi-chan!
**[05:41] Koyomi**
My little sis—
**[05:42] Hanekawa**
Karen-chan and Tsukihi-chan!
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[05:46] Koyomi**
Karen-chan and Tsukihi-chan are
**[05:48] Koyomi**
famous among middle school kids.
**[05:51] Koyomi**
So Sengoku hears about
anything they're up to.
**[05:55] Hanekawa**
I see.
**[05:56] Hanekawa**
Come to think of it,
**[05:58] Hanekawa**
wasn't Sengoku-chan one of
that charm's victims?
**[06:02] Koyomi**
The only victim.
**[06:04] Hanekawa**
Not the only victim.
**[06:06] Hanekawa**
But the biggest victim.
***SIGN*** "You can sit on the bed." "Araragi-kun, you shouldn't
**[06:08] Hanekawa**
But the charms are having
***SIGN*** just ask a girl to your bed like that." "Why not?"
***SIGN*** *Sengoku asked me to sit on her bed.
She even said I couldn't sit anywhere else.*
**[06:10] Hanekawa**
a lot of negative effects.
***SIGN*** *I sit in my chair.*
"By the way, Hanekawa, it's late.
Why are you in your uniform?"
***SIGN*** *Right. I'd been meaning to say something,
but hadn't had the chance.*
***SIGN*** *Hanekawa Tsubasa is always in her uniform.*
"I'm used to you wearing your uniform over break,
**[06:13] Koyomi**
Negative effects?
***SIGN*** so it's fine, but... Don't you have any other clothes? I've never seen you not wearing your uniform!"
**[06:14] Hanekawa**
Mostly in terms of relationships.
***SIGN*** "You saw me in my PJ's." "Pajamas don't count."
***SIGN*** *I'd also seen her in her underwear. But that
doesn't really count, either. What I want to see*
***SIGN*** *is what Hanekawa picks to wear
when she's going out somewhere!*
**[06:17] Hanekawa**
But when we looked into it, we found that
***SIGN*** *When will I ever see them?*
"Well, there's no real reason.
I met Tsukihi-chan this evening,
***SIGN*** and then we came here. Maybe I should start the story there?"
**[06:20] Hanekawa**
all the charms going around were curses.
***SIGN*** "Yeah, thanks."
**[06:22] Hanekawa**
There was a definite trend.
**[06:24] Hanekawa**
Their guess, that someone was
deliberately spreading them,
**[06:29] ---**
probably was just a guess.
**[06:32] Hanekawa**
But even so, it wasn't completely wrong.
**[06:36] Koyomi**
By the way,
**[06:38] Koyomi**
how long have you been going
around with them?
**[06:40] Hanekawa**
I haven't been going around with them.
**[06:43] Hanekawa**
Once in a while, they ask
me for help, and I do.
**[06:46] Hanekawa**
To answer the question of
how long it's been...
**[06:49] Hanekawa**
Hmm,
**[06:50] Hanekawa**
I suppose since the start
of summer vacation.
**[06:54] Koyomi**
So you helped them.
**[06:56] Koyomi**
In other words, you found out
who was behind it.
**[06:59] Koyomi**
*Basically, it was none other
than Hanekawa Tsubasa*
**[07:03] Koyomi**
*who was calling Karen's phone that time.*
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[07:06] Hanekawa**
I'd prefer you didn't try and
act like this is my fault...
**[07:09] Koyomi**
That's what worried Oshino about you...
**[07:13] Koyomi**
That you're too smart,
**[07:14] Koyomi**
and you'll always find the answer.
**[07:16] Hanekawa**
I suppose so.
**[07:18] Hanekawa**
But that doesn't mean I can
not do my best.
**[07:21] Koyomi**
Yeah.
**[07:22] Koyomi**
Just as I, Karen-chan, or Tsukihi-chan...
**[07:27] Koyomi**
Just as I, Karen-chan, or Tsukihi-chan
**[07:29] Koyomi**
must accept our weakness,
**[07:32] Koyomi**
you must accept your strength.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[07:36] Koyomi**
So then what? Karen-chan went to talk
**[07:38] Koyomi**
to whoever was behind this,
**[07:41] Koyomi**
and they did something to her?
**[07:42] Hanekawa**
That's right.
**[07:44] Hanekawa**
I was busy with something else,
**[07:46] Hanekawa**
and only arrived later.
**[07:48] Hanekawa**
So I didn't see the culprit directly.
**[07:51] Hanekawa**
If only I could have met up with
Karen-chan earlier,
**[07:55] ---**
I'd have been able to help.
**[07:57] Koyomi**
Karen-chan said who it was, right?
**[08:00] Hanekawa**
Um...
**[08:01] Hanekawa**
Some weird, ill-omened guy
**[08:03] Hanekawa**
named Kaiki Deishuu.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[08:11] Koyomi**
*I decided to leave my sisters
in Hanekawa's care,*
**[08:14] Koyomi**
*and take a bath.*
**[08:16] Koyomi**
*To be honest, I needed time to cool off,*
**[08:19] Koyomi**
*or I was just going to yell at them again.*
**[08:24] Koyomi**
That's right, Hanekawa...
**[08:26] Koyomi**
What were you talking about
**[08:28] Koyomi**
over the phone, with Senjougahara?
**[08:30] Hanekawa**
Oh, that?
**[08:32] Hanekawa**
Tsukihi-chan sent a message
on her cell phone.
**[08:34] Hanekawa**
But she said it was strange that
there was no response.
**[08:37] Hanekawa**
So I called.
**[08:41] Hanekawa**
For all they might say, they trust you.
**[08:45] Koyomi**
Well, I figured that was what happened.
**[08:49] Koyomi**
But how did you manage to
persuade Senjougahara?
**[08:53] Hanekawa**
It was nothing, really.
**[08:54] Hanekawa**
When I heard her voice,
**[08:56] Hanekawa**
I guessed most of what was happening.
**[08:58] Hanekawa**
So I just made a small request.
**[09:00] Koyomi**
A small request?
**[09:02] Hanekawa**
"If you won't be a good girl,
**[09:04] Hanekawa**
I'll ask Araragi-kun to be my boyfriend."
**[09:11] Koyomi**
*Scary...*
**[09:28] Koyomi**
Um...
**[09:30] Kiss-Shot**
Since you've seen me naked now,
**[09:33] Kiss-Shot**
I guess that means I'll have
to marry you, too.
**[09:37] Kiss-Shot**
My master.
**[09:40] Koyomi**
Shinobu!
**[09:41] Kiss-Shot**
Ha ha!
**[09:42] Kiss-Shot**
What's wrong with you?
**[09:45] Kiss-Shot**
You look like a pigeon that's
been hit by a peashooter.
**[09:48] Kiss-Shot**
Or maybe a vampire that's been
hit by a silver bullet?
**[09:54] Kiss-Shot**
Is it that rare for me to talk?
**[09:56] Kiss-Shot**
Or maybe you thought I'd forgotten how?
**[10:00] Koyomi**
Shinobu, y-you...
**[10:05] Kiss-Shot**
Got bored.
**[10:06] Kiss-Shot**
I'm normally pretty talkative.
**[10:08] Kiss-Shot**
You know that.
**[10:10] Kiss-Shot**
I'm not going to keep my
mouth shut forever.
**[10:13] Kiss-Shot**
You should understand that, my master.
**[10:22] Koyomi**
Thank you.
**[10:25] Kiss-Shot**
What are you talking about?
**[10:27] ---**
Oh...
**[10:29] Koyomi**
Um... These! These chains...
**[10:32] Koyomi**
Weren't you the one who cut them?
**[10:34] Kiss-Shot**
Was I?
**[10:35] Kiss-Shot**
Ha ha!
**[10:36] Kiss-Shot**
I really don't remember.
**[10:38] Kiss-Shot**
But those arms look pretty stupid.
**[10:42] Kiss-Shot**
Let's see.
**[11:06] Kiss-Shot**
No need to thank me.
**[11:08] Kiss-Shot**
I just do what I feel like.
**[11:11] Kiss-Shot**
Always have, always will...
**[11:14] Kiss-Shot**
And this time, purely by chance,
**[11:16] Kiss-Shot**
and I assure you it was just chance,
**[11:18] Kiss-Shot**
your wishes and mine coincided,
**[11:20] Kiss-Shot**
my master.
**[11:23] Koyomi**
Shinobu, hey...
**[11:24] Kiss-Shot**
Hair.
**[11:26] Kiss-Shot**
My hair.
**[11:28] Koyomi**
Wh-What about your hair?
**[11:30] Kiss-Shot**
Wash my hair.
**[11:32] Kiss-Shot**
I feel like trying this shampoo stuff, for fun.
**[11:35] Kiss-Shot**
From your shadow, I've seen you do it,
**[11:38] Kiss-Shot**
and I always thought it looked fun.
**[11:40] Koyomi**
Can I touch you?
**[11:43] Kiss-Shot**
How can you wash my hair
without touching me?
**[11:45] Koyomi**
Okay, I'll give you some hair treatment, too.
**[11:53] Koyomi**
Hey...
**[11:54] Kiss-Shot**
Stop.
**[11:55] Kiss-Shot**
Don't say a word.
**[11:58] Kiss-Shot**
You won't forgive me,
**[12:00] Kiss-Shot**
and I'll never forgive you.
**[12:03] Kiss-Shot**
And that's fine.
**[12:04] Kiss-Shot**
Neither of us forgives the other.
**[12:07] Kiss-Shot**
That's fine.
**[12:09] Kiss-Shot**
We can't let the past be mere
water under the bridge.
**[12:12] Kiss-Shot**
Even so, there's no reason that
we can't come together.
**[12:17] Kiss-Shot**
That's the conclusion I've come to,
after thinking
**[12:20] Kiss-Shot**
for these past three or four months.
**[12:24] Kiss-Shot**
What do you think, my master?
**[12:27] Koyomi**
I'm surprised to hear that
you were thinking that.
**[12:32] Kiss-Shot**
You've been thinking
for yourself, haven't you?
**[12:35] Kiss-Shot**
I've been in your shadow.
**[12:39] Kiss-Shot**
So I know.
**[12:52] Kiss-Shot**
I can't be sullen forever.
**[12:54] Kiss-Shot**
I'm not so small a person.
**[12:57] Kiss-Shot**
And it seems you'll never get this
unless I tell you directly.
**[13:04] Kiss-Shot**
I do like pon-de-ring.
**[13:06] Kiss-Shot**
However...
**[13:07] Kiss-Shot**
Golden chocolate is my favorite!
**[13:10] Kiss-Shot**
So if you're going to buy two, buy those.
**[13:16] Koyomi**
Got it.
**[13:23] Kiss-Shot**
A wreathe-fire bee.
**[13:24] Kiss-Shot**
A supernatural variant of
the Asian giant hornet.
**[13:26] Koyomi**
Is that...
**[13:28] Kiss-Shot**
It's the monster that's afflicting
your colossal sister.
**[13:33] Koyomi**
Bigger sister. Not colossal.
**[13:35] Kiss-Shot**
Just so we're clear,
this isn't my knowledge.
**[13:38] Kiss-Shot**
It's that kid's.
**[13:41] Kiss-Shot**
Can you understand how I felt?
**[13:44] Kiss-Shot**
That sleazy little brat spent
**[13:46] Kiss-Shot**
every hour of every day filling my head
**[13:49] Kiss-Shot**
with useless stories of
ghosts and monsters.
**[13:53] Kiss-Shot**
And I had to sit there and listen,
**[13:55] Kiss-Shot**
without saying a word!
**[13:58] Koyomi**
*That's horrible!*
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[14:00] Kiss-Shot**
And this is one of the stories he told me.
**[14:02] Kiss-Shot**
The wreathe-fire bee.
**[14:04] Kiss-Shot**
I think
**[14:05] Kiss-Shot**
it dates back to around the
fourteenth or fifteenth century.
**[14:08] Kiss-Shot**
A type of infectious disease
with no known cause.
**[14:12] Kiss-Shot**
The disease starts with a
**[14:14] Kiss-Shot**
fever so high that it renders
its victims unable to move,
**[14:17] Kiss-Shot**
proceeding until their death.
**[14:20] Kiss-Shot**
In the end, hundreds of people did die.
**[14:23] Kiss-Shot**
It was a long time before a famous
onmyoji stopped it.
**[14:27] Kiss-Shot**
Supposedly, this was written in
some scroll or another.
**[14:31] Kiss-Shot**
"They were stung by a bee that
could not be touched,
**[14:34] Kiss-Shot**
and their bodies were wreathed
in flames," it said.
**[14:41] Koyomi**
*Karen is the type*
**[14:43] Koyomi**
*who hates to show weakness.*
**[14:45] Koyomi**
*And I'll be honest when I say
I didn't notice a thing.*
**[14:48] Koyomi**
*But she was under considerable stress.*
**[14:52] Koyomi**
*She was running a bad fever.*
**[14:54] ---**
*Hanekawa said she felt like,*
**[14:57] Koyomi**
*she was covered in flames.*
**[15:00] Koyomi**
*In other words, she was really sick.*
**[15:05] Koyomi**
Jeez...
**[15:06] Koyomi**
So that's why Hanekawa
was covering for her.
**[15:08] Koyomi**
I still think it's her own fault.
**[15:11] Kiss-Shot**
Her own fault?
**[15:13] Kiss-Shot**
You're really tough on your family...
**[15:16] Kiss-Shot**
Well, I've been watching for a long time,
**[15:19] Kiss-Shot**
so I can't say this surprises me.
**[15:21] Kiss-Shot**
But even so,
**[15:22] Kiss-Shot**
while I'm not certain I agree
**[15:24] Kiss-Shot**
with your former class president,
**[15:25] Kiss-Shot**
I really am surprised.
**[15:26] Koyomi**
Former class president?
***SIGN*** She's still class president, you know.
**[15:30] Koyomi**
I don't think I'm being harsh.
**[15:33] Koyomi**
But either way, I guess this Kaiki guy
**[15:37] Koyomi**
used a supernatural monster
to poison my sister.
**[15:39] Koyomi**
I don't know if that's possible, but...
**[15:43] Kiss-Shot**
It's possible.
**[15:44] Kiss-Shot**
Doable, certainly.
**[15:46] Kiss-Shot**
But...
**[15:48] Kiss-Shot**
If we believe what your tsundere told us,
**[15:52] Kiss-Shot**
Kaiki was a fake and a con man.
**[15:55] Koyomi**
That's true...
**[15:57] Kiss-Shot**
Of course,
**[15:58] Kiss-Shot**
there's no reason
**[15:59] Kiss-Shot**
a fake can't do what the real thing would.
**[16:03] Kiss-Shot**
And it's possible for a fake
**[16:04] Kiss-Shot**
to be more real than the real thing.
**[16:07] Koyomi**
True...
**[16:09] Koyomi**
Certainly,
**[16:10] Koyomi**
it's possible for someone to be
**[16:12] Koyomi**
unskilled as a specialist,
but still a master con artist.
**[16:15] Kiss-Shot**
Unskilled as a specialist...
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[16:20] Kiss-Shot**
But in that case,
**[16:21] Kiss-Shot**
they'd be an even bigger problem
than someone who's good at it.
**[16:26] Kiss-Shot**
Anyone who would bend the supernatural to their will without the
**[16:29] Kiss-Shot**
proper talents isn't acting
as a normal person would.
**[16:31] Kiss-Shot**
Their lack of skill isn't the issue.
**[16:33] Kiss-Shot**
They're not even human.
**[16:37] Kiss-Shot**
It would be more accurate to say
**[16:39] Kiss-Shot**
that they themselves are a supernatural monster.
**[16:43] Koyomi**
Well, I can ask Senjougahara about that.
**[16:47] Koyomi**
In fact, I don't have a choice.
**[16:49] Koyomi**
The problem is how to get her...
**[16:52] Koyomi**
Well, I suppose there's no point
in faking this in front of you.
**[16:55] Koyomi**
Karen-chan...
**[16:56] Koyomi**
How to get her symptoms down.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[17:02] Koyomi**
Shinobu, could you eat her disease?
**[17:08] Kiss-Shot**
Unfortunately...
**[17:10] Kiss-Shot**
The disease is merely the result.
**[17:13] Kiss-Shot**
I could make a tasty snack of the bee,
**[17:15] Kiss-Shot**
but I can't eat the result of a bee sting.
**[17:18] Koyomi**
That's right.
**[17:19] Koyomi**
Hmm...
**[17:20] Koyomi**
Then what?
**[17:22] Koyomi**
Did Oshino say anything about
dealing with a wreathe-fire bee?
**[17:27] Kiss-Shot**
Did he?
**[17:29] Kiss-Shot**
I think he might have,
**[17:31] Kiss-Shot**
but his lectures tended to wander
all over the place...
**[17:36] Kiss-Shot**
Come to think of it,
**[17:37] Kiss-Shot**
it's been a long time since
I last had a bath.
**[17:39] Kiss-Shot**
Ha ha.
**[17:40] Koyomi**
Has it?
**[17:41] Kiss-Shot**
Yup.
**[17:42] Kiss-Shot**
Maybe four hundred years.
**[17:44] Koyomi**
A scale beyond my power to imitate.
**[17:49] Kiss-Shot**
What are you staring at?
**[17:51] Kiss-Shot**
If you're staring this closely at
a young girl's naked body,
**[17:54] Kiss-Shot**
does that make you a true pervert?
**[17:55] Koyomi**
No, that's not what I...
**[17:59] Kiss-Shot**
Your passionate gaze
**[18:03] Kiss-Shot**
is stimulating my imagination a little bit.
**[18:07] Kiss-Shot**
Nothing exciting...
**[18:09] Kiss-Shot**
For example,
**[18:10] Kiss-Shot**
what do you think would happen
if I started to scream
**[18:13] Kiss-Shot**
so loudly that the whole
house could hear?
**[18:18] Kiss-Shot**
Just stuff like that.
**[18:21] Kiss-Shot**
Of course, if you were to offer me
**[18:23] Kiss-Shot**
a giant pile of donuts to
keep my mouth shut,
**[18:27] Kiss-Shot**
I would be willing to negotiate.
**[18:32] Koyomi**
Go ahead and try.
**[18:34] Koyomi**
You and I are one.
**[18:36] Koyomi**
Since you can't leave my shadow,
**[18:38] Koyomi**
it'll be bad for you, too.
**[18:40] Koyomi**
If nothing else,
**[18:41] Koyomi**
you'll never get any more Mister Donuts.
**[18:43] Kiss-Shot**
Ha ha.
**[18:44] Kiss-Shot**
I see, then.
**[18:46] Kiss-Shot**
So that's your answer.
I guess you've grown up a little, my master.
**[18:49] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan, how long will you
be taking that bath?
**[18:52] Tsukihi**
You were going to listen to
my story next, right?
**[18:56] ---**
Umm...
**[19:10] Tsukihi**
Huh?
**[19:11] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan, where's that girl?
**[19:14] Koyomi**
Girl?
**[19:15] Koyomi**
What are you talking about?
**[19:17] Koyomi**
Don't say nonsensical things
during an emergency.
**[19:20] Koyomi**
Stupid girl...
**[19:22] Tsukihi**
Maybe I imagined it.
**[19:24] Koyomi**
Definitely!
**[19:25] Koyomi**
There was no girl with bright golden hair,
pale white skin, and a flat chest,
**[19:28] Koyomi**
who spoke in a haughty, old-style voice,
**[19:30] Koyomi**
but appeared to be around eight years old.
**[19:32] Koyomi**
You imagined it.
**[19:34] Tsukihi**
Really...
**[19:38] Tsukihi**
Well, whatever.
**[19:39] Tsukihi**
I'll let it slide.
**[19:41] Tsukihi**
Anyway, Onii-chan, your bath
is taking quite a while.
**[19:44] Tsukihi**
How long will you be?
**[19:47] Koyomi**
I'll be out in a second.
**[19:48] Koyomi**
Wait in the living room.
**[19:49] Tsukihi**
Right...
**[19:50] Koyomi**
And learn to knock.
**[19:54] Tsukihi**
You've never said that before!
**[19:56] Tsukihi**
Since when did you stop being a kid?
**[19:58] Tsukihi**
Don't get cocky, just because
you have some muscle now!
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[20:08] Kiss-Shot**
Ha ha.
**[20:09] Kiss-Shot**
That was scary...
**[20:11] Kiss-Shot**
You have a very violent sister.
**[20:12] Koyomi**
Shut up.
**[20:16] Kiss-Shot**
By the way, I'm sure this isn't
something the kid mentioned...
**[20:21] Kiss-Shot**
In fact, he deliberately kept it secret.
**[20:25] Kiss-Shot**
But when do you suppose
you're going to die?
**[20:29] Koyomi**
What does that mean?
**[20:30] Kiss-Shot**
Well, you know...
**[20:33] Kiss-Shot**
You're mostly human,
**[20:35] Kiss-Shot**
but at the same time,
you're still part vampire.
**[20:39] Kiss-Shot**
What does that mean for your lifespan?
**[20:44] Kiss-Shot**
Your toughness may have
reverted to human levels.
**[20:46] Kiss-Shot**
But it's possible that your lifespan
remains that of a vampire.
**[20:49] Kiss-Shot**
You retain some of your healing ability.
**[20:53] Kiss-Shot**
It's possible you'll live, not four hundred,
**[20:57] Kiss-Shot**
but five hundred years like me.
**[21:04] Kiss-Shot**
And your lover,
**[21:05] Kiss-Shot**
your friends,
**[21:06] Kiss-Shot**
your junior classmate,
**[21:07] Kiss-Shot**
your little sisters...
**[21:09] Kiss-Shot**
All of them are going to
die and disappear.
**[21:13] Kiss-Shot**
And in the end, it'll just be you and me.
**[21:17] Kiss-Shot**
No matter what bonds you
forge with others,
**[21:20] Kiss-Shot**
time will tear them apart.
**[21:26] Kiss-Shot**
Well?
**[21:27] Kiss-Shot**
Doesn't thinking about it
make you sick?
**[21:33] Kiss-Shot**
So here's a plan...
**[21:36] Kiss-Shot**
Why don't you kill me,
**[21:38] Kiss-Shot**
and go back to being a human for real?
**[21:44] Koyomi**
Don't be silly.
**[21:46] Koyomi**
It's just like you said.
**[21:48] Koyomi**
I won't forgive you,
**[21:50] Koyomi**
and you won't forgive me.
**[21:53] Koyomi**
That's all there is to it.
**[21:54] Koyomi**
And we're done discussing this.
**[21:58] Koyomi**
There's nothing left to say.
**[22:00] Koyomi**
We live until we die.
**[22:05] Kiss-Shot**
Very well, then.
**[22:07] Kiss-Shot**
Pray I don't kill you in your sleep,
**[22:11] Kiss-Shot**
my master.
**[22:14] Kiss-Shot**
Regardless, my life is well past its prime.
**[22:18] Kiss-Shot**
I'll while away some of my
**[22:20] Kiss-Shot**
remaining time beside you,
as your shadow.
**[22:23] Kiss-Shot**
But I've no intention of getting along.
**[22:25] Kiss-Shot**
Lower your guard, and I'll
kill you, then and there.
**[22:31] Koyomi**
*And so, little by little,*
**[22:33] Koyomi**
*Shinobu and I came to a reconciliation.*
# E5 - Karen Bee, Part Five
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYGGV451Y/karen-bee-part-5)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] Koyomi**
Where's the big one?
**[00:07] Tsukihi**
Hanekawa-san's looking after her.
**[00:11] Koyomi**
Then tell me the details.
**[00:14] Tsukihi**
Sure, okay.
**[00:16] Tsukihi**
But will you promise me something first?
**[00:19] Koyomi**
Are you in a position to make demands?
**[00:21] Tsukihi**
Sure, I am. I'm your little sister.
**[00:23] Koyomi**
And I'm your big brother,
so I can refuse them.
**[00:28] Tsukihi**
Fine. Forget it.
**[00:30] Koyomi**
By the way, what were you
going to ask me to do?
**[00:33] Tsukihi**
Not to get mad at Karen-chan.
**[00:36] Koyomi**
No.
**[00:36] Tsukihi**
You can be mad at me,
**[00:38] Tsukihi**
but don't get mad at Karen-chan.
**[00:40] Koyomi**
I'm getting mad at both of you.
**[00:42] Tsukihi**
You can be mad at Karen-chan,
**[00:44] Tsukihi**
but please don't get mad at me.
**[00:45] Koyomi**
I'm already mad.
**[00:47] Koyomi**
So start talking, and get it off your chest.
**[00:50] Tsukihi**
You think you're so cool.
**[00:52] Tsukihi**
You promised you wouldn't get mad
**[00:53] Tsukihi**
when Hanekawa-san was around.
**[00:56] Tsukihi**
Do you have any regrets, Onii-chan?
**[00:59] Koyomi**
Regrets?
**[01:00] Koyomi**
Of course I do.
**[01:02] Koyomi**
Does anyone not?
**[01:04] Tsukihi**
Well, I don't know...
**[01:06] Tsukihi**
I guess I'm not the type to regret things.
**[01:09] Koyomi**
I bet.
**[01:10] Koyomi**
You two sisters are like that.
**[01:12] Tsukihi**
But that means that sometimes,
**[01:14] Tsukihi**
I regret that I didn't regret something
**[01:18] Tsukihi**
when I should have.
**[01:26] Tsukihi**
Not that it matters.
**[01:29] Koyomi**
I guess you really want a strangling...
**[01:31] Tsukihi**
No, that's not it...
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[01:34] Koyomi**
Then get to the point.
**[01:37] Tsukihi**
I know, Onii-chan...
**[01:38] Tsukihi**
I'll tell you something cool.
**[01:40] Tsukihi**
Something cool?
**[01:41] Tsukihi**
You know how I always say
I'm "platinum" mad?
**[01:44] Tsukihi**
It was originally "pretty" mad.
**[01:48] Tsukihi**
So it doesn't mean that I'm so mad,
**[01:50] Tsukihi**
the word "platinum" comes to mind.
**[01:52] Koyomi**
I've never heard you say "platinum" mad.
**[01:55] Tsukihi**
How come you don't know?
**[01:57] Tsukihi**
I'm platinum mad!
**[01:58] Koyomi**
You're clearly extremely upset!
**[02:00] Koyomi**
And stop trying to cleverly
change the subject.
**[02:04] Tsukihi**
Okay, Onii-chan.
**[02:05] Tsukihi**
Then why don't you tell me
something you regret?
**[02:10] Tsukihi**
I want to hear it.
**[02:13] Tsukihi**
Just telling you straight out would
be kind of upsetting.
**[02:16] Tsukihi**
So maybe we could like, share secrets?
**[02:20] Tsukihi**
Like we were on a school trip or something!
**[02:22] Koyomi**
Idiot...
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[02:23] Koyomi**
Still, what I regret, huh?
**[02:26] Koyomi**
It's hard to come up with something,
**[02:28] Koyomi**
now that I think about it.
**[02:29] Tsukihi**
Like, something that's kind
of embarrassing.
**[02:32] Tsukihi**
Like... Oh...
**[02:35] Tsukihi**
Why don't you have any friends?
**[02:38] Koyomi**
I have friends now!
**[02:38] Tsukihi**
Do you?
**[02:39] Tsukihi**
How many?
**[02:40] Koyomi**
How many?
**[02:41] Koyomi**
Let me tell you...
**[02:45] Koyomi**
Five!
**[02:47] Tsukihi**
Wow, that seriously scared me.
**[02:50] Tsukihi**
Poor onii-chan...
**[02:51] Tsukihi**
You're going to die of loneliness!
**[02:53] Koyomi**
Don't be so mean to your brother!
**[02:56] Koyomi**
Anyway, I have some now,
**[02:58] Koyomi**
but you're asking why I didn't
have any for a while.
**[03:01] Koyomi**
Well, here's what I used to think.
**[03:05] Koyomi**
If you make friends, that means
your human hardness—
**[03:07] Tsukihi**
No, I've already heard enough
embarrassing stuff.
**[03:11] Tsukihi**
I'm sorry I asked.
**[03:13] Koyomi**
Don't apologize yet!
**[03:14] Koyomi**
I haven't said anything embarrassing!
**[03:16] Tsukihi**
Stop it, Onii-chan!
**[03:18] Tsukihi**
That's enough!
**[03:18] Tsukihi**
You needn't reopen the wounds anymore!
**[03:21] Tsukihi**
Stop it... It's over!
**[03:23] Koyomi**
It's not over!
**[03:24] Hanekawa**
Araragi-kun, I can hear you
from the second floor!
**[03:28] Hanekawa**
And I can hear you talking about something
**[03:30] Hanekawa**
that really doesn't sound too important.
**[03:32] Hanekawa**
Could you be a little more quiet?
**[03:35] Koyomi**
Yeah, sorry.
**[03:37] Koyomi**
I'll be more care...
***SIGN*** Episode 5: Karen Bee, Part 5
**[05:21] Koyomi**
Let's talk about Araragi Karen for a while.
**[05:24] Koyomi**
Of course, this is just based on what
**[05:27] Koyomi**
I heard from Tsukihi and Hanekawa.
**[05:30] Koyomi**
So it may differ slightly from what happened.
**[05:34] Kaiki**
Welcome, young lady.
**[05:35] Kaiki**
My name is Kaiki.
**[05:37] Kaiki**
"Kai," like a mound of clamshells.
**[05:40] Kaiki**
"Ki," like a dead tree. What's your name?
**[05:42] Karen**
Araragi Karen.
**[05:44] Karen**
The "kozato" radical, with the
kanji for possibility.
**[05:46] Karen**
"It is good."
**[05:47] Karen**
And "ki," like a young tree.
**[05:48] Karen**
And my given name means
"to admire the flame."
**[05:49] Karen**
Karen.
**[05:51] Kaiki**
An excellent name.
**[05:52] Kaiki**
Be grateful to your parents.
**[05:59] Kaiki**
So, which are you?
**[06:01] Kaiki**
Do you want to learn a charm?
**[06:03] Kaiki**
Or have one undone?
**[06:07] Kaiki**
The former is 10,000 yen.
**[06:08] Kaiki**
The latter, 20,000.
**[06:10] Karen**
Neither.
**[06:11] Karen**
I've come here to punch you!
**[06:13] Kaiki**
To punch me.
**[06:15] Kaiki**
So the message you sent me was a fake,
**[06:18] Kaiki**
and this is a trap.
**[06:20] Kaiki**
I see.
**[06:21] Kaiki**
Well done.
**[06:23] Kaiki**
Of course, I don't believe that
**[06:26] Kaiki**
you were the one who did it.
**[06:28] Kaiki**
I can't imagine a simpleton like you
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[06:31] Kaiki**
being able to reach me.
**[06:36] Kaiki**
Not many people could.
**[06:38] Kaiki**
Only someone who's a touch abnormal
**[06:41] Kaiki**
could get this far.
**[06:46] Karen**
What you're doing is a giant pain in the butt.
**[06:49] Karen**
You don't need me to explain, do you?
**[06:51] Kaiki**
A pain?
**[06:53] Kaiki**
I'm giving you kids what you want.
**[06:57] Kaiki**
How you use it is your responsibility.
**[06:59] Karen**
Our responsibility?
**[07:02] Karen**
How is it our responsibility?
**[07:03] Karen**
How dare you?!
**[07:04] Karen**
You're ruining people's relationships...
**[07:07] Karen**
What are you thinking?
**[07:09] Kaiki**
What am I thinking?
**[07:11] Kaiki**
Quite a deep question.
**[07:13] Kaiki**
Unfortunately, I'll have to respond
with a shallow answer.
**[07:19] Kaiki**
I'm doing it for the money, naturally.
**[07:21] Karen**
Money?
**[07:23] Kaiki**
Money makes the world go round.
**[07:27] Kaiki**
I suppose you've come here out of
**[07:30] Kaiki**
some primitive sense of justice.
**[07:32] Kaiki**
But that was a mistake.
**[07:36] Kaiki**
You could have earned 100,000 yen for this.
**[07:38] Kaiki**
The lesson for you here is that working for free
**[07:40] Kaiki**
isn't worth it.
**[07:42] Karen**
No one hired me!
**[07:44] Karen**
I'm not here because someone asked me to be!
**[07:48] Kaiki**
I see...
**[07:49] Kaiki**
Then you should have had someone ask you.
**[07:51] Karen**
Even if someone had, I wouldn't
have taken their money!
**[07:54] Kaiki**
So young...
**[07:56] Kaiki**
I'm not at all jealous, though.
**[07:59] Kaiki**
What's wrong?
**[08:00] Kaiki**
You're shaking, Araragi.
**[08:03] Karen**
I'm not shaking...
**[08:07] Kaiki**
Araragi, you've heard what I wanted.
**[08:11] Kaiki**
Now it's your turn.
**[08:13] Kaiki**
What do you want?
**[08:15] Karen**
I told you already.
**[08:17] Karen**
I came here to punch you!
**[08:20] Kaiki**
Just to punch me?
**[08:22] Karen**
I'll kick you, too!
**[08:23] Kaiki**
Violence, then?
**[08:24] Karen**
Force!
**[08:26] Karen**
And I'll make you stop this.
**[08:28] Karen**
Selling this crap to middle schoolers?
**[08:31] Karen**
What are you thinking?
**[08:32] Karen**
And you call yourself an adult?!
**[08:34] Kaiki**
I'm an adult, yes.
**[08:36] Kaiki**
And of course I'm selling it to them...
**[08:42] Kaiki**
I'm a con man.
**[08:46] Karen**
Aren't you embarrassed,
selling charms to middle schoolers?
**[08:49] Kaiki**
Not at all.
**[08:50] Kaiki**
Children are simple to fool.
**[08:53] Kaiki**
That's all.
**[08:54] Kaiki**
But, Araragi, if you want to stop me,
**[08:58] Kaiki**
punches and kicks are useless.
**[09:01] Kaiki**
The fastest way would be to bring money.
**[09:05] Kaiki**
My target for this little business is 3,000,000 yen.
***SIGN*** 3,000,000 Yen
**[09:09] Kaiki**
I've waited over two months for it to take root.
**[09:12] Kaiki**
Any less, and it wouldn't be worth my time.
**[09:15] Karen**
And you call yourself human?
**[09:18] Kaiki**
Unfortunately, I am human, yes.
**[09:21] Kaiki**
I'm willing to sacrifice my life to protect
**[09:24] Kaiki**
what's dear to me.
**[09:26] Kaiki**
Just as you fill your heart through good deeds,
**[09:28] Kaiki**
I fill my bank account with evil ones.
**[09:32] Kaiki**
Is there really a difference?
**[09:34] Karen**
A-A difference?
**[09:36] Kaiki**
No, there's no difference at all.
**[09:38] Kaiki**
Your activities may make someone happier.
**[09:42] Kaiki**
But the same is true
**[09:43] Kaiki**
if I take the money I've earned and use it
**[09:47] Kaiki**
to grease the gears of a capitalist economy.
**[09:50] Kaiki**
The lesson for you here is that
**[09:53] Kaiki**
just as there isn't a problem that
can't be solved by being right,
**[09:56] Kaiki**
there isn't a problem that
can't be solved by money.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[10:02] Kaiki**
The same is true of my victims, yes?
**[10:05] Kaiki**
They paid me in money.
**[10:08] Kaiki**
This means that they recognized
**[10:09] Kaiki**
money as an object of value.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[10:12] Kaiki**
Is the same not true of you?
**[10:14] Kaiki**
Or did you not pay
**[10:15] Kaiki**
in money when you bought that jacket?
**[10:18] Karen**
D-Don't talk about the jacket!
**[10:22] Karen**
Just give me your answer...
**[10:24] Karen**
Do you want to be punched?
**[10:25] Karen**
Or...
**[10:27] Kaiki**
I don't want to be punched.
**[10:28] Kaiki**
Nor do I want to be kicked.
**[10:30] Kaiki**
I dislike pain.
**[10:32] Kaiki**
So,
**[10:34] Kaiki**
here is a present for you, a bee.
**[11:07] Kaiki**
It's working quite well.
**[11:10] Kaiki**
You must have an active imagination.
**[11:13] Kaiki**
The lesson for you here is to assume
**[11:16] Kaiki**
that any person you see is a con man.
**[11:19] Kaiki**
Learn to doubt others.
**[11:22] Kaiki**
Did you think I would beg for forgiveness?
**[11:25] Kaiki**
Then you're just a fool.
**[11:27] Kaiki**
If you want me to have a change of heart,
**[11:29] Kaiki**
bring some cash.
**[11:30] Kaiki**
I'd be willing to discuss it for 10,000,000 yen.
**[11:33] Karen**
What did you do?
**[11:35] Karen**
What did you do to me?!
**[11:37] Kaiki**
Something bad.
**[11:39] Kaiki**
Of course, nothing is free.
**[11:41] Kaiki**
I'll take money for it.
**[11:43] Kaiki**
4,000 yen? I suppose that will do.
**[11:47] Kaiki**
I'll throw in our little chat as a bonus.
**[11:50] Kaiki**
I suppose I can leave some change
for train fare home...
**[11:52] Kaiki**
Oh, you already have a ticket.
**[11:56] Kaiki**
Then you won't need this change.
**[11:59] Kaiki**
In a moment, the poison will take hold,
**[12:00] Kaiki**
and you'll be able to move.
**[12:02] Kaiki**
I recommend using a cell to call for help.
**[12:06] Kaiki**
In the meantime, I'll make my escape.
**[12:09] Kaiki**
Of course, I'll continue what I was doing.
**[12:12] Kaiki**
But from now on, I'll avoid meeting
my customers directly.
**[12:18] Kaiki**
An excellent lesson...
**[12:20] Kaiki**
Farewell.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[12:26] Hanekawa**
Araragi-kun, are you upset?
**[12:29] Koyomi**
About what?
**[12:30] Hanekawa**
Well, you know...
**[12:31] Hanekawa**
I was the one who tracked him down.
**[12:34] Hanekawa**
Are you mad about what
happened to Karen-chan?
**[12:38] Koyomi**
I wouldn't say I'm mad.
**[12:40] Koyomi**
But I'd like to say that if you were going to
**[12:43] Koyomi**
help the Fire Sisters, you should have told me.
**[12:46] Hanekawa**
But wouldn't you have gotten mad?
**[12:49] Hanekawa**
And if I decide I want to be friends
with Karen-chan and Tsukihi-chan,
**[12:53] Hanekawa**
isn't it my choice?
**[12:54] Koyomi**
It is your choice.
**[12:55] Hanekawa**
Yup.
**[12:58] Hanekawa**
But as an apology for not telling you
**[13:00] Hanekawa**
about Karen-chan and Tsukihi-chan,
**[13:04] Hanekawa**
you can have this ticket!
**[13:06] Koyomi**
What's this?
**[13:07] Hanekawa**
This ticket entitles you to touch my breasts
**[13:09] Hanekawa**
whenever you want, for as long as you like.
**[13:11] Hanekawa**
It's yours.
**[13:13] Koyomi**
Seriously?
**[13:15] Hanekawa**
Seriously.
**[13:16] Hanekawa**
But if you use it, I'll hate you forever.
**[13:19] Koyomi**
Then it's useless!
**[13:23] Hanekawa**
Well, putting that aside,
**[13:27] Hanekawa**
don't be too mean to Karen-chan
and Tsukihi-chan.
**[13:31] Koyomi**
It's fine.
**[13:33] Koyomi**
Don't worry about it.
**[13:35] Koyomi**
I realize they aren't just doing it for fun.
**[13:38] Hanekawa**
I know we talked about this before...
**[13:44] Hanekawa**
But still, they are kind of like you.
**[13:48] Koyomi**
They resemble me?
**[13:49] Hanekawa**
Not on the outside, on the inside.
**[13:52] Hanekawa**
I guess I'm one to talk, though.
**[13:55] Koyomi**
That's sure true.
**[13:56] Koyomi**
Of course, your family and
mine are different.
**[14:02] Hanekawa**
Oshino-san...
**[14:04] Hanekawa**
What's Oshino-san up to right now?
**[14:07] Koyomi**
I don't know.
**[14:08] Koyomi**
But he's watching over us
from somewhere.
**[14:12] Koyomi**
He'll probably just fix whatever's
wrong with Karen-chan.
**[14:17] Koyomi**
From what Shinobu said, the wreathe-fire bee
**[14:20] Koyomi**
is a very low-level monster.
**[14:23] Hanekawa**
Shinobu-chan?
**[14:24] Hanekawa**
Wreathe-fire bee?
**[14:30] Hanekawa**
A wreathe-fire bee, huh?
**[14:32] Hanekawa**
But I'm glad to see you've
made up with Shinobu-chan.
**[14:36] Koyomi**
I'm not upset about it, but...
**[14:42] Hanekawa**
Well, the reason Oshino-san left was
**[14:45] Hanekawa**
because he thought he could leave
Shinobu-chan to you, right?
**[14:49] Hanekawa**
Really, it would've made sense
if you'd reconciled
**[14:52] Hanekawa**
just after the culture fair.
**[14:54] Koyomi**
I guess that means it's taken a long time.
**[14:57] Koyomi**
You could say I've been slacking on the job.
**[15:00] Hanekawa**
You haven't been slacking at all.
**[15:03] Hanekawa**
I know that very well.
**[15:05] Koyomi**
You know everything, don't you?
**[15:08] Hanekawa**
I don't know everything.
**[15:10] Hanekawa**
I just know what I know.
**[15:12] Hanekawa**
The real problem in a fight comes
after you've made up.
**[15:15] Hanekawa**
Keep that in mind.
**[15:27] Hanekawa**
I can go the rest of the way myself.
**[15:29] Koyomi**
Take my bike.
**[15:30] Koyomi**
I'll lend it to you.
**[15:31] Hanekawa**
You're sure?
**[15:32] Hanekawa**
I'll take it, I guess.
**[15:35] Hanekawa**
Okay, then thanks.
**[15:39] Hanekawa**
I'll give it back tomorrow.
**[15:41] Koyomi**
Yeah.
**[15:42] Hanekawa**
Get this solved tonight.
**[15:45] Hanekawa**
You have to start studying
again tomorrow.
**[15:50] Hanekawa**
It's good that you're being a brother,
**[15:52] Hanekawa**
but don't forget that you're a
high school student, too!
**[15:58] Karen**
You're making too big a deal
out of this, Nii-chan.
**[16:00] Karen**
That's why I didn't want to tell you.
**[16:03] Karen**
People should keep their mouths shut.
**[16:05] Karen**
It's just a fever.
**[16:08] Koyomi**
Shut up.
**[16:09] Koyomi**
You're sick, so shut up and do what I say.
**[16:13] Koyomi**
Want to eat something?
**[16:14] Koyomi**
Canned peaches?
**[16:15] Karen**
No appetite.
**[16:17] Koyomi**
I see.
**[16:19] Koyomi**
I'm gonna let down your hair.
**[16:20] Karen**
I want to take a bath.
**[16:22] Karen**
This sweat feels awful.
**[16:24] Koyomi**
Your hair.
**[16:26] Karen**
Go ahead.
**[16:32] Koyomi**
A bath isn't happening,
**[16:34] Koyomi**
but I'll wipe down your body.
**[16:38] Karen**
Thanks.
**[16:39] Karen**
Not that I like it.
**[16:41] Koyomi**
Right.
**[16:42] Koyomi**
Then remove your clothes.
**[16:49] Koyomi**
Hey, I said to remove your clothes.
**[16:51] Karen**
Sorry, Nii-chan.
**[16:54] Karen**
I'm tired...
**[16:55] Karen**
Take my clothes off.
**[16:58] Karen**
Wipe me down.
**[16:59] Karen**
Put them back on.
**[17:01] Koyomi**
Why, you...
***SIGN*** Nii-chan saw me naked, and I am so freaking embarrassed. —Karen
**[17:04] Karen**
Nii-chan saw me naked,
**[17:05] Karen**
and I am so freaking embarrassed.
**[17:07] Koyomi**
Why is it a haiku?
**[17:09] Karen**
Because I'm embarrassed!
**[17:11] Koyomi**
You dance around half naked
when you get out of the bath.
**[17:13] Koyomi**
I don't want to hear it.
**[17:15] Karen**
I'm not dancing!
**[17:16] Karen**
That's aerobics!
**[17:23] Koyomi**
I'll wipe down your back.
**[17:25] Koyomi**
Turn over.
**[17:28] Karen**
Too lazy.
**[17:29] Karen**
Turn me over.
**[17:32] Karen**
Damn it...
**[17:35] Karen**
I screwed this up.
**[17:40] Karen**
I know strength is more important
**[17:41] Karen**
than being right. I didn't need you to tell me.
**[17:45] Karen**
But you can't get strong all of a sudden.
**[17:48] Karen**
However,
**[17:49] Karen**
that doesn't mean you can just
ignore all the bad stuff you see
**[17:53] Karen**
until you are strong.
**[17:55] Karen**
The blood of justice flows through me,
**[17:58] Karen**
and it tells me to punish evil.
**[17:59] Koyomi**
You just like punching people.
**[18:02] Koyomi**
That's what I think.
**[18:03] Karen**
I'm sure it all looks like a game to you.
**[18:06] Karen**
But Kaiki...
**[18:09] Karen**
Kaiki Deishuu...
**[18:11] Karen**
Tsukihi-chan already told you
**[18:14] Karen**
why he was spreading those
weird charms and curses
**[18:18] Karen**
around the middle schools, right?
**[18:21] Karen**
That's right... It was for money.
**[18:23] Karen**
He spread hatred...
**[18:25] Karen**
Fear...
**[18:26] Karen**
And then, he took advantage of it,
**[18:28] Karen**
to take money without
actually doing anything.
**[18:33] Karen**
And when I asked him if
he weren't ashamed,
**[18:35] Karen**
here is what he said.
**[18:39] Karen**
Without a trace of shame, he said,
**[18:41] Karen**
"Children are easier to fool."
**[18:44] Koyomi**
Easier to fool...
**[18:45] Karen**
Tsukihi-chan's friend... Sengoku, was it?
**[18:48] Karen**
She didn't really want to talk about it,
**[18:52] Karen**
but whatever happened, didn't you save her?
**[18:56] Karen**
But she was one of the lucky ones.
**[18:59] Karen**
Some kids went to Kaiki for help, not knowing
he was the source of the rumors.
**[19:03] Karen**
And when they tried to get the money,
**[19:05] Karen**
he demanded they be arrested
for shoplifting.
**[19:07] Karen**
Could you have let that happen?
**[19:10] Karen**
Could you have looked them
in the eye and said,
**[19:11] Karen**
"I'm not strong yet, so I won't do anything"?
**[19:16] Karen**
He told me money was everything.
**[19:19] Karen**
I didn't think anyone like that
existed outside of manga.
**[19:23] Karen**
I mean, money is important.
**[19:26] ---**
But aren't there other things
that matter, too?
***SIGN*** Love
**[19:29] Karen**
Like love!
**[19:30] Koyomi**
*Our opinions overlapped.*
**[19:31] Karen**
Money isn't everything.
**[19:34] Karen**
It's just most everything!
**[19:35] Koyomi**
*Okay, maybe not.*
**[19:38] Karen**
Nii-chan, Tsukihi-chan and I
are serious about this.
**[19:42] Karen**
We won't stop here.
**[19:44] Karen**
If this happens again, we'll do the same thing.
**[19:48] Karen**
This time, I may have lost the outcome.
**[19:50] Karen**
But I didn't lose mentally.
**[19:52] Karen**
And next time, I'll win.
**[19:53] Karen**
I'll keep it up until I win.
**[19:54] Karen**
I'll try, even if I don't win.
**[19:56] Karen**
The outcome isn't all that's important.
Right, Nii-chan?
**[20:00] Koyomi**
Lose the match, but win the game, huh?
**[20:03] Koyomi**
That's not something I'd expect
to hear from a martial artist.
**[20:07] Karen**
You can lose the match and the game,
**[20:09] Karen**
but if you don't lose to yourself,
it isn't a loss.
**[20:12] Karen**
That's my way.
**[20:14] Koyomi**
But as long as you stay like that,
**[20:17] Koyomi**
those around you will suffer.
**[20:20] Koyomi**
That's why you'll never grow up.
**[20:25] Karen**
I'm already grown up.
**[20:26] Karen**
Look at these boobs!
**[20:28] Koyomi**
Not even half Hanekawa's size.
**[20:30] Koyomi**
What of it?
**[20:32] Karen**
Tsubasa-san is that big?
**[20:34] Koyomi**
She's the real thing.
**[20:36] Koyomi**
I think you know that.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[20:38] Koyomi**
Honestly,
**[20:40] Koyomi**
I'd prefer if you didn't hang
out with Hanekawa.
**[20:43] Koyomi**
But I guess this is a good chance.
**[20:45] Koyomi**
From now on, you should
start learning from her.
**[20:49] Koyomi**
Don't move.
**[20:50] Koyomi**
It's hard to wipe you down.
**[20:51] Karen**
It's fine now. I feel much better.
**[20:54] Koyomi**
We're almost done. Don't stop now.
**[20:57] Karen**
I don't want to get you sick.
**[21:02] Koyomi**
*Get me sick?*
**[21:04] Koyomi**
Wait a second.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[21:06] Koyomi**
Shinobu.
**[21:07] Kiss-Shot**
What?
**[21:08] Kiss-Shot**
It's almost time for bed.
**[21:12] Koyomi**
Then, one thing before bed...
**[21:15] Koyomi**
Is there any way to transfer
her illness to me?
**[21:19] Koyomi**
It's more of a supernatural poison
than an illness.
**[21:22] Koyomi**
And it was given to her deliberately.
**[21:25] Koyomi**
So wouldn't it be possible for
her to give it to me?
**[21:30] Kiss-Shot**
So you're saying you'll take her illness?
**[21:35] Kiss-Shot**
There is a way.
**[21:36] Kiss-Shot**
But honestly, I can't recommend it.
**[21:41] Kiss-Shot**
Or it would be more accurate to say
**[21:42] Kiss-Shot**
I certainly wouldn't prefer it.
**[21:45] Koyomi**
I understand there's a risk.
**[21:46] Kiss-Shot**
I don't know if "risk" is the right word.
**[21:49] Kiss-Shot**
Well, I suppose it's an urban legend.
**[21:52] Kiss-Shot**
I think the kid used totally different
words to describe it.
**[21:56] Koyomi**
What?
**[21:57] Koyomi**
That's pretty vague.
And not like you at all.
**[22:01] Kiss-Shot**
Well, I don't know...
**[22:02] Kiss-Shot**
Whether it's something that would
be allowed, I couldn't say.
**[22:06] Koyomi**
I don't know what you're talking about,
**[22:08] Koyomi**
but of course it would.
**[22:10] Koyomi**
If there's any way to alleviate her suffering,
**[22:12] Koyomi**
we should take it.
**[22:14] Kiss-Shot**
Very true.
**[22:17] Kiss-Shot**
Do what you will.
**[22:21] Karen**
Nii-chan,
**[22:23] Karen**
I don't know if you went to
the bathroom or what,
**[22:25] Karen**
but you should have at least dressed me first.
**[22:29] Koyomi**
Karen-chan.
**[22:34] Koyomi**
I'm going to kiss you now.
# E6 - Karen Bee, Part Six
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYE5M1XXR/karen-bee-part-6)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:06] Araragi**
I'll just tell you how it ended up.
**[00:10] Araragi**
I wasn't able to take all the poison
**[00:12] Araragi**
from the wreathe-fire bee.
***SIGN*** Stay with Karen, and don't cause any trouble today. —Koyomi
**[00:18] Araragi**
But even so, Karen's fever went down a little.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[00:40] Araragi**
Hey, Hachikuji.
**[00:43] Araragi**
U-Um...
**[00:45] Araragi**
Hachikuji?
**[00:47] Hachikuji**
Is that you, Araragi-san?
**[00:49] Araragi**
Come on, screw up my name!
**[00:50] Hachikuji**
Araragi-san, if you're greeting
me like a normal person,
**[00:53] Hachikuji**
that means you've gotten boring.
**[00:57] Hachikuji**
Did something happen?
**[00:58] Araragi**
Harsh!
**[01:00] Araragi**
Hey, you didn't like it, anyway!
**[01:03] Hachikuji**
That was just me acting,
so you'd do it more.
**[01:05] Hachikuji**
You didn't really think "no"
means "no", did you?
**[01:08] Hachikuji**
Jeez.
***SIGN*** Don't push. Danger.
**[01:09] Hachikuji**
You ruined the opportunity I gave you!
**[01:11] Araragi**
Your "acting" is harsh!
**[01:13] Hachikuji**
You screwed it up right at the start.
**[01:15] Hachikuji**
Now the whole joke's wasted.
**[01:17] Araragi**
It's really that bad?!
**[01:20] Araragi**
Hey, Hachikuji.
**[01:21] Araragi**
Wait...
**[01:22] Hachikuji**
I don't know you.
**[01:23] Hachikuji**
My friend Araragi-san is dead.
**[01:26] Hachikuji**
Remove the sexual harassment from Araragi-san,
**[01:28] Hachikuji**
and there's nothing left but a flea.
**[01:31] Araragi**
No part of me was a flea to begin with!
***SIGN*** Sexual Harassment Flea
**[01:35] Hachikuji**
I don't even want to see your face.
**[01:37] Hachikuji**
Disappear.
**[01:37] Araragi**
Don't say that!
**[01:39] Araragi**
Senjougahara's said that
to me a hundred times,
**[01:41] Araragi**
but when you say it,
I really do want to disappear.
**[01:44] Araragi**
So don't say that...
**[01:46] Hachikuji**
Huh?
**[01:46] Hachikuji**
I told you to disappear.
Why are you still here?
**[01:49] Hachikuji**
You can't even do that?
***SIGN*** Danger Ahead!
**[01:52] Araragi**
I want to restart from a save point!
**[01:56] Hachikuji**
So what happened?
**[01:58] Hachikuji**
You seem pretty serious,
compared to yesterday.
**[02:01] Araragi**
Serious, huh?
**[02:03] Araragi**
Yeah, maybe.
**[02:04] Araragi**
A lot of stuff's happened.
**[02:07] Hachikuji**
Well, I won't ask for details.
**[02:09] Hachikuji**
But, Araragi-san,
**[02:10] Hachikuji**
you're looking disturbingly pale...
**[02:14] Araragi**
Am I?
**[02:15] Hachikuji**
You don't seem well.
***SIGN*** I took half of Karen's illness, but that shouldn't result in any physical effects.
***SIGN*** Wait, maybe Hachikuji can tell?
**[02:22] Araragi**
It was something called a wreathe-fire bee.
**[02:25] Araragi**
It's a totally different type
**[02:27] Araragi**
than your snail, I think.
**[02:30] Araragi**
But it's a problem anyway.
**[02:32] Hachikuji**
I see.
**[02:34] Hachikuji**
That is a problem...
**[02:35] Hachikuji**
But I'm sure you'll be fine, Araragi-san.
**[02:39] Hachikuji**
You always have been, right?
**[02:43] Araragi**
I hope so...
**[02:45] Araragi**
A lot of stuff is going wrong.
**[02:49] Araragi**
For one thing, my sisters are idiots.
**[02:51] Hachikuji**
More idiotic than you?
**[02:53] Araragi**
Don't call me an idiot!
**[02:56] Araragi**
What they're saying is right,
**[02:58] Araragi**
and I'd like to respect that...
**[03:01] Araragi**
But they're too rash.
**[03:03] Araragi**
What they want to do is right, but they
aren't doing it right, right away.
**[03:06] Araragi**
That's how it feels.
**[03:09] Hachikuji**
Isn't that what you're always being told?
**[03:13] Hachikuji**
And if you weren't like that,
**[03:16] Hachikuji**
I wouldn't be able to take
a nice walk around here.
**[03:19] Hachikuji**
So doesn't that mean that
**[03:23] Hachikuji**
they've saved a lot of people?
**[03:27] Araragi**
Still, I guess they're just kids.
**[03:30] Araragi**
They don't listen to a word anyone says.
**[03:33] Araragi**
I have to do this thing
**[03:34] Araragi**
while they're still sensible
enough to stay home.
**[03:38] Araragi**
Sensible...
**[03:41] Araragi**
Hachikuji, when do you think
you become an adult?
**[03:46] Hachikuji**
Not while you're saying things like that.
**[03:49] Hachikuji**
In Japan, you officially
become an adult at twenty,
**[03:51] Hachikuji**
but it changes, depending on the era.
**[03:53] Hachikuji**
Some people say that once you
start working, you're an adult.
**[03:57] Hachikuji**
But you can be an adult without working.
**[04:00] Araragi**
You can become an adult just by aging, huh?
**[04:03] Araragi**
I guess telling two girls in their
second and third years
**[04:07] Araragi**
of middle school to grow up
is asking too much.
**[04:10] Araragi**
Age-wise, they're kids.
**[04:12] Hachikuji**
That's the point!
**[04:14] Hachikuji**
It's natural for a middle schooler to be a kid.
**[04:17] Hachikuji**
But the fact that
**[04:18] Hachikuji**
they don't realize they're kids is the problem.
**[04:21] Hachikuji**
They may still be better than adults
**[04:24] Hachikuji**
who don't think they're adults.
**[04:25] Araragi**
There's nothing as difficult to deal with
**[04:28] Araragi**
as an adult who thinks they're a kid...
**[04:30] Araragi**
By the way, Hachikuji,
how do you think of yourself?
**[04:34] Hachikuji**
The body of a child and the brains of an adult.
**[04:36] Araragi**
So, you're a detective?!
**[04:39] Araragi**
Then, Hachihachiji...
**[04:41] Araragi**
What were we talking about?
**[04:42] Hachikuji**
Araragi-san, you're missing a temple.
**[04:44] Araragi**
I see.
**[04:45] Araragi**
I didn't realize. Sorry.
**[04:47] Araragi**
Hachishichiji.
**[04:48] Hachikuji**
Are we losing temples each time
you say my name?!
**[04:52] Araragi**
Hachirokuji.
**[04:53] Araragi**
I'm almost to Senjougahara's house.
**[04:55] Araragi**
We should split up here.
**[04:58] Hachikuji**
Oh, right.
**[05:00] Hachikuji**
You're right.
**[05:01] Hachikuji**
She doesn't like me.
**[05:05] Hachikuji**
Farewell, Araragi-san.
**[05:06] Hachikuji**
Be well.
**[05:07] Araragi**
You, too.
**[05:10] Araragi**
*But at the time, I didn't know*
**[05:13] Araragi**
*what would happen to the cheerful young girl*
**[05:16] Araragi**
*named Hachikuji Mayoi.*
**[05:21] Araragi**
*Just kidding.*
**[05:23] Araragi**
*Honestly, I have no idea what will happen.*
***SIGN*** Episode 5: Karen Bee, Part 6
***SIGN*** Tamikurasou
***SIGN*** 201
**[07:20] Araragi**
Um...
**[07:21] Araragi**
Gahara-san?
**[07:22] Senjougahara**
A question, Araragi-kun...
**[07:24] Senjougahara**
If, by some strange coincidence,
a hundred sharp pencils
**[07:26] Senjougahara**
I was carrying embedded
themselves in a third party,
**[07:31] Senjougahara**
would that be an accidental death?
**[07:32] Araragi**
No, it would be murder!
**[07:33] Araragi**
First-degree murder!
**[07:34] Araragi**
The following day's headlines would
read, "Man Killed by Pencils!"
**[07:38] Senjougahara**
Then I'll sharpen more pencils on
top of those headlines.
**[07:42] Araragi**
Calm down, Senjougahara!
**[07:44] Araragi**
You may think that's a good line,
but it really isn't!
**[07:48] Senjougahara**
Take off your shoes and come in, Araragi-kun.
**[07:53] Senjougahara**
Don't worry. I won't tie you up again.
**[07:57] Araragi**
Thanks...
**[08:00] Araragi**
Well?
**[08:01] Araragi**
If I ask, will you tell me why you're
**[08:04] Araragi**
arming yourself so heavily?
**[08:07] Senjougahara**
I'm going to go and chat with Kaiki.
**[08:09] Senjougahara**
As you've refused my protection,
**[08:12] Senjougahara**
I've no choice but to go on the attack.
**[08:14] Araragi**
Kidnapping and protection
are not the same thing!
***SIGN*** One match can start a fire
***SIGN*** Be careful
with fire
**[08:18] Araragi**
By the way, I talked to Hanekawa afterwards.
**[08:21] Senjougahara**
What?
**[08:22] Senjougahara**
Did Hanekawa-sama...
**[08:23] Senjougahara**
I mean, Hanekawa-san say anything about me?
**[08:26] Araragi**
Did you just say "Hanekawa-sama"?
***SIGN*** One match can start a fire
***SIGN*** Be careful
with fire
**[08:29] Senjougahara**
I-I did not.
**[08:30] Senjougahara**
There is no bullying occurring at my school.
***SIGN*** Bullying Is A Crime
**[08:32] Araragi**
You're being bullied? You?!
**[08:35] Araragi**
I mean, given the way you act,
**[08:37] Araragi**
I can see you might attract a lot
of Hanekawa's attention.
**[08:40] Araragi**
But don't say you're being bullied...
**[08:42] Araragi**
That's mean.
**[08:43] Senjougahara**
I'm not saying that.
**[08:46] Senjougahara**
I'm polishing her shoes every morning
**[08:49] Senjougahara**
because I enjoy doing so.
**[08:52] Araragi**
Why do you act like that toward her?
**[08:55] Araragi**
Anyway, you're going to see Kaiki, right?
**[08:59] Araragi**
But, Senjougahara, do you know where he is?
**[09:02] Senjougahara**
I have a business card from long ago,
**[09:05] Senjougahara**
one he gave me.
**[09:07] Senjougahara**
It's a miracle I never threw it away.
***SIGN*** Ghost Buster Kaiki Deishuu
**[09:12] Araragi**
Senjougahara, I'm about to say
**[09:15] Araragi**
the worst thing in the world.
***SIGN*** Ghost Buster Kaiki Deishuu
**[09:17] Araragi**
But if you fell for this, isn't it
partially your own fault?
**[09:20] Senjougahara**
That's the trap.
**[09:22] Senjougahara**
You'd never think that anyone
who'd give themselves
**[09:25] Senjougahara**
such a ridiculous title would
actually be a con man.
**[09:28] Araragi**
Is that how it works?
**[09:30] Araragi**
So what, Senjougahara?
**[09:31] Araragi**
You called this number,
and you spoke with him?
**[09:35] Senjougahara**
Yes.
**[09:36] Senjougahara**
He hadn't changed a bit.
**[09:39] Senjougahara**
As gloomy as ever.
**[09:42] Araragi**
Can I go with you?
**[09:47] Araragi**
If you're going to speak with Kaiki,
I want to go...
**[09:53] Senjougahara**
I can still pretend I didn't hear that.
**[09:57] Senjougahara**
Unless you wish to die, take that back.
**[10:01] Araragi**
My sister was one of his victims.
***SIGN*** Ghost Buster Kaiki Deishuu
**[10:04] Araragi**
He set some bizarre monster called
a wreathe-fire bee on her.
**[10:09] Araragi**
She's suffering from a terrible fever.
**[10:11] Araragi**
I've taken half of it upon myself, to neutralize it,
**[10:14] Araragi**
but I don't know what could
happen in the future.
**[10:19] Senjougahara**
You took half of it yourself?
**[10:22] Senjougahara**
Will you be okay?
**[10:25] Araragi**
My vampiric healing ability
is keeping me safe.
**[10:28] Araragi**
It isn't perfect, but...
**[10:30] Senjougahara**
I see.
**[10:31] Senjougahara**
Then there's no turning back for you.
**[10:34] Senjougahara**
But I suppose with your sister involved,
**[10:36] Senjougahara**
that was never really a possibility.
**[10:38] Araragi**
That's not all.
**[10:40] Araragi**
You're involved, too.
**[10:43] Araragi**
Your trying to deal with Kaiki alone,
for my sake, is insane.
**[10:47] Araragi**
Am I wrong?
**[10:50] Senjougahara**
It isn't only for your sake.
**[10:54] Senjougahara**
Kaiki is one of the things
I need to settle for myself.
**[10:59] Senjougahara**
To the point where, had he not returned,
**[11:02] Senjougahara**
I'd have gone looking for him.
**[11:05] Araragi**
Why are you so obsessed?
***SIGN*** One match can start a fire
***SIGN*** Be careful
with fire
**[11:08] Araragi**
Wasn't it a little thing?
**[11:11] Senjougahara**
That was me tsundere-ing.
**[11:13] Araragi**
Tsundere-ing?
**[11:15] Araragi**
Do you plan to seek revenge on all
five of the con artists like that?
**[11:19] Araragi**
It's over.
**[11:21] Araragi**
Aren't there other things you should settle?
**[11:25] Senjougahara**
Of course not.
**[11:26] Senjougahara**
Like Oshino-san said, I won't pretend
**[11:30] Senjougahara**
to be their helpless victim.
**[11:33] Senjougahara**
I relied on them, and I was betrayed.
**[11:35] Senjougahara**
My personality isn't such that I still...
**[11:39] Senjougahara**
My personality...
**[11:42] Senjougahara**
My personality isn't the issue here.
**[11:44] Senjougahara**
I won't do that.
***SIGN*** One match can start a fire
**[11:46] Araragi**
*You have some personality
problems, don't you?*
**[11:49] Senjougahara**
But Kaiki is a different matter.
**[11:50] Araragi**
Why?
**[11:52] Senjougahara**
He's the one responsible for my
mom and dad's divorce.
**[11:57] Senjougahara**
Naturally, I can't blame the
entire thing on Kaiki,
**[12:00] Senjougahara**
and I don't intend to.
**[12:01] Senjougahara**
But he ruined my family.
**[12:04] Senjougahara**
I can't forgive that.
**[12:06] Senjougahara**
If I forgave it...
**[12:09] Senjougahara**
I wouldn't be myself anymore.
**[12:13] Senjougahara**
I think that
**[12:14] Senjougahara**
even without Kaiki, my mom and
dad would have divorced.
**[12:17] Senjougahara**
I think my family would have been split up.
**[12:21] Senjougahara**
I think it's my fault that my mom left...
**[12:26] Senjougahara**
But, Araragi-kun,
**[12:28] Senjougahara**
does the fact that the result would have
**[12:30] Senjougahara**
been the same forgive the fact
that he caused it?
**[12:34] Senjougahara**
Does the fact that it would have happened,
**[12:36] Senjougahara**
sooner or later, forgive the fact that
he made it happen, out of malice?
***SIGN*** Malice
**[12:39] Araragi**
Malice.
**[12:41] Senjougahara**
Malice is something I have a monopoly on.
**[12:43] Araragi**
I don't know about that.
***SIGN*** Ghost Buster Kaiki Deishuu
**[12:45] Senjougahara**
Kaiki used the crab I met to ruin
**[12:49] Senjougahara**
my family, all for money.
**[12:51] Senjougahara**
Because it made no difference...
**[12:56] Senjougahara**
It's possible that you were a
secondary concern for me,
**[13:01] Senjougahara**
that protecting you was simply an excuse.
**[13:04] Senjougahara**
And that, in the end, I simply hate Kaiki.
**[13:08] Araragi**
An excuse?
***SIGN*** One match can start a fire
***SIGN*** Be careful
with fire
**[13:10] Senjougahara**
So I tsundere-ed.
**[13:13] Senjougahara**
Don't get the wrong idea.
**[13:15] Senjougahara**
I'm not doing this for your sake, Araragi-kun.
**[13:20] Araragi**
That is
**[13:22] Araragi**
probably not true.
**[13:25] Araragi**
The crab...
**[13:26] Araragi**
The crab that Senjougahara met.
***SIGN*** Stop
***SIGN*** Beast
***SIGN*** Perversion and Sexual Desire
***SIGN*** Praying
***SIGN*** Flashback
Flashback
Flashback
**[13:28] Araragi**
This happened when the crab was possessing her.
***SIGN*** In Surgery
**[13:31] Araragi**
She couldn't even hate Kaiki Deishuu when it happened.
***SIGN*** M*m Broken
**[13:37] Araragi**
That was how the crab worked.
***SIGN*** Hand Hand Hand
**[13:41] Araragi**
She should have gotten angry, like a child.
**[13:44] Araragi**
A child who'd lost her mom.
**[13:46] Araragi**
But then, there is
**[13:49] Araragi**
one thing I don't understand.
**[13:52] Araragi**
Kaiki is a con man and a fake, right?
**[13:55] Araragi**
But from what you said,
it sounds like he saw your crab.
**[13:59] Senjougahara**
I don't know.
**[14:00] Senjougahara**
But a fake with more power
than the real thing
**[14:04] Senjougahara**
is more dangerous than the real thing.
**[14:06] Senjougahara**
Of course, at the time,
**[14:08] Senjougahara**
I thought him just another sleazy con artist.
**[14:10] Senjougahara**
But thinking back,
**[14:11] Senjougahara**
he may have deliberately feigned incompetence
**[14:14] Senjougahara**
to draw more money from my father.
**[14:17] Araragi**
He's spending his time taking pocket
change from middle schoolers now.
**[14:21] Araragi**
And he got my sister when
she tried to stop him.
**[14:25] Senjougahara**
I see.
**[14:26] Senjougahara**
Your sister is a hero-man like you.
**[14:28] Araragi**
Stop calling me that!
**[14:31] Senjougahara**
The Fire Sisters of Tsuganoki
2nd Middle School.
**[14:33] Senjougahara**
I'd heard the rumors.
**[14:36] Araragi**
Come to think of it, you did hear about them.
**[14:38] Senjougahara**
Just so we're clear, Araragi-kun,
**[14:40] Senjougahara**
my impression is that
**[14:41] Senjougahara**
"right" is a concept that won't work on him.
**[14:45] Senjougahara**
And "right" is all you have,
**[14:46] Senjougahara**
which makes you strong against hypocrites,
**[14:48] Senjougahara**
but weak against someone who's really evil.
**[14:51] Araragi**
I told you I'm not like that...
**[14:53] Araragi**
However,
**[14:54] Araragi**
I won't sit back and let you become a criminal.
**[14:57] Senjougahara**
I've no intention of committing any crimes.
**[15:00] Senjougahara**
I'm just going to punish him...
**[15:02] Araragi**
In modern society the two are identical.
***SIGN*** One match can start a fire
***SIGN*** Be careful
with fire
**[15:05] Araragi**
Senjougahara, you might not know this,
**[15:09] Araragi**
but I love you.
**[15:11] Araragi**
Even if you do become a criminal,
and end up in jail,
**[15:15] Araragi**
I'd still visit you every day.
**[15:19] Araragi**
But I'd rather be with you all the time.
**[15:22] Araragi**
Sometimes, I don't know
why I'm dating you.
**[15:27] Araragi**
But I love you so much, I don't need a reason.
**[15:32] Araragi**
If you're going, then let's go together.
**[15:34] Araragi**
You can protect me...
**[15:36] Araragi**
I'll protect you.
**[15:38] Senjougahara**
Oh, no.
**[15:39] Senjougahara**
So incredibly cool...
**[15:41] Senjougahara**
If I were a man,
**[15:43] Senjougahara**
I'd be so jealous of your manliness
that I'd kill you.
**[15:46] Araragi**
Terrifying!
***SIGN*** Terrifying
**[15:47] Senjougahara**
I'm glad I'm a woman
**[15:49] Senjougahara**
because I can love you...
**[15:53] Senjougahara**
I understand, Araragi-kun.
**[15:55] Senjougahara**
I'll do as you say.
**[15:57] Araragi**
Then you'll take me to Kaiki?
**[16:00] Senjougahara**
Yes.
**[16:01] Senjougahara**
But in exchange, I do have a request.
**[16:04] Araragi**
A request?
**[16:05] Senjougahara**
If you dislike the presumption implied
by the word "request,"
**[16:09] Senjougahara**
then call it a condition.
**[16:10] Senjougahara**
A condition required before
I'll take you to Kaiki.
**[16:13] Senjougahara**
What will you do?
**[16:14] Araragi**
I'll do it.
**[16:16] Araragi**
I'll do it gladly, no matter what
it is or how many there are.
**[16:19] Hachikuji**
I have just one request, Araragi-kun.
**[16:23] Hachikuji**
By meeting with Kaiki, I intend
to resolve things with myself.
**[16:28] Hachikuji**
Just like my master cut...
**[16:29] Hachikuji**
I mean, Hanekawa-san cut her hair.
**[16:31] Araragi**
That is a remarkable mistake to make.
***SIGN*** My Master
**[16:34] Araragi**
And not anything I can pretend I didn't hear!
**[16:35] Senjougahara**
I am not being threatened.
**[16:36] Araragi**
You're being threatened? By Hanekawa?!
**[16:38] Senjougahara**
No matter where I am,
**[16:40] Senjougahara**
it's natural that I should kneel
before Hanekawa-san.
**[16:43] Araragi**
No matter where you are?
**[16:44] Senjougahara**
Just as Hanekawa-san...
**[16:46] Senjougahara**
As Hanekawa-san cut her hair.
**[16:49] Senjougahara**
Just as doing that let her move forward,
**[16:52] Senjougahara**
I'm going to settle things with
my past by meeting Kaiki.
**[16:57] Senjougahara**
I'm going to move forward.
**[17:01] Araragi**
So, what's your request?
**[17:04] Araragi**
What must I do, for you to take me with you?
**[17:07] Senjougahara**
I can't say yet.
**[17:08] Araragi**
It's something you can't tell me?
**[17:10] Senjougahara**
Once things are settled with Kaiki,
**[17:12] Senjougahara**
no matter what the outcome,
**[17:13] Senjougahara**
I'll tell you then.
**[17:15] Araragi**
Then there's no difference if you say it now.
**[17:17] Senjougahara**
If I said it now, it wouldn't be foreshadowing.
**[17:20] Araragi**
It's foreshadowing?!
**[17:21] Senjougahara**
That's right.
**[17:22] Senjougahara**
After you die, I'll have to spend
**[17:25] Senjougahara**
the rest of my life alone, regretting
that I didn't say anything now.
**[17:28] Araragi**
It's foreshadowing my death?
**[17:30] Senjougahara**
That's right.
**[17:31] Senjougahara**
And in the climactic scene,
**[17:33] Senjougahara**
the telescope you gave me for
**[17:35] Senjougahara**
my birthday features as an important item.
**[17:38] Araragi**
There isn't a scene involving a telescope!
**[17:42] Araragi**
Just tell me what it is...
**[17:43] Araragi**
Screw the foreshadowing!
**[17:44] Senjougahara**
Then let's forget the whole thing.
**[17:48] Araragi**
Fine... I'll do it.
**[17:49] Senjougahara**
All right.
**[17:51] Senjougahara**
Then let's go.
**[17:53] Senjougahara**
Let's protect each other.
***SIGN*** Room 201
**[17:56] Senjougahara**
I promised I'd meet him at 5:00 PM.
**[17:59] Araragi**
Right...
**[18:00] Araragi**
Then I'll be going back to my house.
**[18:02] Senjougahara**
Very well.
**[18:03] Senjougahara**
Then come back in the early evening.
**[18:05] Araragi**
Yeah.
**[18:06] Araragi**
Don't do anything on your own, okay?
**[18:08] Senjougahara**
Of course not.
**[18:09] Senjougahara**
Have I ever lied?
**[18:13] Senjougahara**
Don't worry.
**[18:15] Senjougahara**
This time, it's to get you
to hear my request.
**[18:19] Senjougahara**
I might lie, but I'll keep my promise.
**[18:22] Araragi**
All right...
**[18:24] Araragi**
Well, then that's okay.
**[18:26] Senjougahara**
Yes.
**[18:27] Senjougahara**
This is a trade.
**[18:28] Senjougahara**
And...
**[18:30] Senjougahara**
Even I'm starting to get a little tired.
**[18:33] Senjougahara**
You've been up all night,
**[18:35] Senjougahara**
even if you were unconscious for a while.
**[18:37] Senjougahara**
Kaiki isn't someone you can
deal with on no sleep.
**[18:42] Araragi**
Well, I think I deal with no
sleep better than most.
**[18:46] Araragi**
As a former vampire.
**[18:47] Senjougahara**
But rest up anyway.
**[18:50] Senjougahara**
You might not be able to sleep tonight.
**[19:00] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan?
**[19:01] Araragi**
Oh, you're up?
**[19:03] Araragi**
Good morning.
**[19:04] Tsukihi**
Karen-chan is gone!
**[19:07] Tsukihi**
When I got up...
**[19:09] Tsukihi**
She wasn't there...
**[19:12] Tsukihi**
And she can't be fully healed yet!
**[19:14] Araragi**
Calm down, Tsukihi-chan!
**[19:17] Senjougahara**
Her shoes are gone,
**[19:18] Senjougahara**
and it looks like she changed her clothes...
**[19:20] Araragi**
Calm down.
**[19:21] Araragi**
Do you have any idea where she'd go?
**[19:22] Araragi**
Anywhere she'd be likely to go?
**[19:25] Tsukihi**
None...
**[19:26] Tsukihi**
I think she'd go to that Kaiki guy's place.
**[19:29] Tsukihi**
But I don't know where he is...
**[19:34] Araragi**
Does that mean Karen-chan does?
**[19:37] Tsukihi**
She shouldn't.
**[19:38] Tsukihi**
She let him go once.
**[19:42] Araragi**
I'll look for her.
**[19:44] Araragi**
You wait at home.
**[19:46] Tsukihi**
But I want to go, too.
**[19:48] Araragi**
If you find her, there's a risk she'll
persuade you to go with her.
**[19:53] Tsukihi**
You really don't trust me, do you?
**[19:55] Araragi**
I don't.
**[19:57] Araragi**
But I do worry.
**[20:01] Araragi**
But more than that, I'm mad!
**[20:09] Araragi**
*Think.*
**[20:11] Araragi**
*If I were Karen, what would I do?*
**[20:13] Araragi**
*First, I'd want to get away from the house.*
***SIGN*** No Cars Please
**[20:15] Araragi**
*Because if I found her, I'd take her back.*
**[20:17] Araragi**
*That much is certain.*
**[20:19] Araragi**
*The problem is, what then?*
**[20:22] Araragi**
*What then? What then? What then?*
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[20:24] Shinobu**
Be quiet...
**[20:26] Shinobu**
You're being too loud for me to sleep.
**[20:29] Shinobu**
When you panic,
**[20:31] Shinobu**
that panic is transmitted directly to me.
**[20:36] Araragi**
Shinobu,
**[20:37] Araragi**
do you know what's going on?
**[20:38] Shinobu**
Basically.
**[20:40] Shinobu**
Your sister's almost as reckless as you are...
**[20:47] Shinobu**
Come to think of it,
**[20:49] Shinobu**
you once searched for me when I was lost.
**[20:52] Shinobu**
I remember those days.
**[20:55] Araragi**
Can I ask if you're going to help me?
**[20:57] Shinobu**
Ha ha.
**[20:58] Shinobu**
Unfortunately,
**[21:00] Shinobu**
I'm not in a position to refuse
any request you make.
**[21:04] Shinobu**
The question of which of us is the master
**[21:06] Shinobu**
is a complicated one,
**[21:08] Shinobu**
but you're certainly the stronger.
**[21:10] Shinobu**
I've told you a bunch of times that
**[21:11] Shinobu**
the bonds of a vampire are
bonds of the soul, right?
**[21:14] Shinobu**
Thus,
**[21:16] Shinobu**
for any order you give me,
**[21:18] Shinobu**
no matter how much I may
want to refuse, I cannot.
**[21:22] Araragi**
It isn't an order.
**[21:23] Araragi**
I'm not in a position to order you.
**[21:26] Shinobu**
Then I won't do it, idiot.
**[21:28] Shinobu**
What you just saw
**[21:29] Shinobu**
was me saying I'd help you,
but I'd rather not say so myself.
**[21:33] Shinobu**
So please allow me to save face
by calling it an order.
**[21:37] Shinobu**
Why couldn't you tell?
**[21:39] Shinobu**
My showing up right now,
when I should clearly
**[21:43] Shinobu**
be sleeping was obviously
so that I could help you.
**[21:49] Araragi**
You're a tsundere, too.
**[21:53] Araragi**
Then it's an order.
**[21:54] Araragi**
Get off your ass, and find out
where Karen-chan is, already!
**[21:57] Shinobu**
Oh, no... Oh, no.
**[21:59] Shinobu**
What cruel fate forces me
to obey the orders
**[22:03] Shinobu**
of a lesser being like this human?
**[22:05] Shinobu**
But I cannot disobey an order...
**[22:11] Shinobu**
You can't do anything without me around.
**[22:15] Shinobu**
You're so cute.
**[22:18] Shinobu**
Ha ha.
**[22:21] Shinobu**
Your sister's blood is structurally
similar to yours.
**[22:25] Shinobu**
So I can tell where she is by the smell.
**[22:32] Shinobu**
She doesn't seem to have gone very far...
# E7 - Karen Bee, Part Seven
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR9PX3V36/karen-bee-part-7)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:07] Karen**
Hey, kiss-freak...
**[00:10] Koyomi**
We're going home.
**[00:11] Karen**
Shut up.
**[00:12] Karen**
Go home by yourself.
**[00:13] Karen**
Don't try and stop me.
**[00:15] Karen**
I told you...
**[00:17] Karen**
How mad he made me.
**[00:20] Koyomi**
And I told you to leave the rest to me.
**[00:23] Karen**
I...
**[00:24] Karen**
I never said I would.
**[00:26] Koyomi**
Don't push yourself...
**[00:28] Koyomi**
You should rest right now.
**[00:31] Karen**
I'm not going to talk about this.
**[00:34] Karen**
You won't listen to what I have to say anyway.
**[00:37] Koyomi**
I'll listen later.
**[00:39] Koyomi**
I'll sit beside you, peeling apples,
**[00:41] Koyomi**
while you rest.
**[00:43] Karen**
Come to think of it,
**[00:45] ---**
it's been a long time since
I've had a real, serious
**[00:47] ---**
fight with you!
***SIGN*** Episode 7: Karen Bee, Part 7
**[00:55] Koyomi**
Don't be stupid.
**[00:56] Koyomi**
I've never been serious
against my little sister.
**[01:00] Koyomi**
This isn't the dojo.
**[01:03] Koyomi**
And you're not in great shape,
***SIGN*** Stung by Supernatural Bee
**[01:05] Koyomi**
**[01:05] Koyomi**
right?
**[01:06] Karen**
Great shape?
**[01:07] Karen**
You've got that right.
**[01:09] Karen**
My head's all stuffed up,
and my whole body is hot.
**[01:13] Karen**
It feels like my clothes are
about to catch fire.
**[01:15] Karen**
My muscles ache, and I can barely walk.
**[01:19] Karen**
And maybe there isn't enough moisture
**[01:21] ---**
in my eyes, 'cause you look all blurry.
**[01:24] Karen**
The next time I blink, I might
never open my eyes again.
**[01:28] Karen**
So I'm in the best shape of my life!
**[01:32] Koyomi**
Pretty cool...
**[01:33] Koyomi**
If you weren't my sister,
I'd fall in love with you.
**[01:36] Karen**
If you weren't my brother,
I might be able to hold back!
***SIGN***
**[01:49] Karen**
Thanks, Nii-chan...
**[01:51] Karen**
That woke me up!
**[01:53] Karen**
There are twenty minutes till
the next bus comes.
**[01:57] Karen**
Nii-chan, should I call you an ambulance?
**[01:59] Koyomi**
Hell, no.
**[02:00] Koyomi**
The one who'll be taking the ambulance...
**[02:04] ---**
is you!
**[02:05] Karen**
No way.
**[02:06] Karen**
How can he stand?
**[02:07] Karen**
That could've killed him.
**[02:09] Karen**
I was told never to use it outside the dojo...
**[02:12] Koyomi**
Then I think it's time they kicked you out!
**[02:14] Karen**
Don't try and stop me!
**[02:27] Karen**
By the way, Nii-chan...
***SIGN*** When Your Body Feels Hot
**[02:29] Karen**
When you say, "Your body feels hot,"
**[02:32] Karen**
don't you think it seems kinda naughty?
**[02:34] Koyomi**
I don't...
**[02:37] Karen**
Because
**[02:37] Karen**
"hot" is the first three letters of "hotel"!
**[02:39] Koyomi**
Are you my junior?!
***SIGN*** Naughtiness in the Athletic Storeroom
A beast of lust arrives!
***SIGN*** Talk to us about anything
**[02:41] Karen**
Your junior? Who's that?
**[02:43] Koyomi**
The biggest pervert I know!
***SIGN*** Kanbaru
Suruga
***SIGN*** Recreation
**[02:54] Shinobu**
Hey, master...
***SIGN*** Recreation
**[02:58] Shinobu**
Did I not tell you?
**[03:00] Shinobu**
Just as your fears are transmitted to me directly,
**[03:05] Shinobu**
I feel your pain, as well.
**[03:11] Koyomi**
Put up with it for a little longer.
***SIGN*** Recreation
**[03:13] Shinobu**
If you order me to, I will act.
**[03:16] Koyomi**
Here's your order: do nothing.
***SIGN*** Recreation
**[03:19] Shinobu**
You ask the hardest things...
**[03:22] Koyomi**
I'll pat your head later.
***SIGN*** Recreation
**[03:25] Shinobu**
That isn't enough.
**[03:26] Shinobu**
I request a ritual one level higher.
**[03:31] Koyomi**
I didn't know there was one.
***SIGN*** Recreation
**[03:32] Koyomi**
Out of curiosity, what is it?
**[03:35] Shinobu**
Don't pat my head...
**[03:39] Shinobu**
Rub my breasts.
***SIGN*** Recreation
***SIGN*** Recreation
**[03:43] Koyomi**
Why didn't you say that to me
**[03:45] ---**
when you were still an adult?!
***SIGN*** Punch
**[03:55] Karen**
Give it up, already.
**[03:57] Karen**
It hurts my fists when I punch you...
**[04:00] Koyomi**
Forget that.
**[04:01] Koyomi**
It hurts me when you punch me.
**[04:04] Karen**
You can't beat me, Nii-chan.
**[04:07] Koyomi**
You can't beat me, Karen-chan.
**[04:09] Karen**
This is your chance to surrender, Nii-chan!
**[04:12] Koyomi**
It's way too late for that line.
**[04:16] Karen**
My fists hurt, so I'm going
to stop punching you.
**[04:26] Karen**
Not bad, Nii-chan!
**[04:34] Koyomi**
Hey!
**[04:54] Karen**
You get it now, right?
**[04:56] Karen**
You can't beat me, Nii-chan!
**[04:58] Koyomi**
You're the one who needs to get it...
**[05:01] Koyomi**
You can't beat me, Karen-chan!
**[05:04] Karen**
The good guy always wins, right?
**[05:07] Karen**
Doesn't that mean that whoever
wins is right, Nii-chan?
**[05:10] Karen**
So if I beat you, I can go?
**[05:13] Koyomi**
That way of thinking is dangerous.
**[05:16] Koyomi**
It's about as far from justice as you can get.
**[05:19] Karen**
What are you talking about?
**[05:20] Karen**
You always say that, don't you?
**[05:22] Karen**
Like a big arrogant jerk.
**[05:24] Koyomi**
What do I say?
**[05:26] Karen**
About Tsukihi-chan and me...
**[05:28] Karen**
We're right, but we aren't strong.
**[05:31] Karen**
And the good guys always win,
so you can't lose.
***SIGN*** Fakes
**[05:35] Karen**
You always talk like you're so
much better than we are!
**[05:40] Karen**
So I tried to make it so I wouldn't lose...
**[05:42] Koyomi**
Oh, that?
**[05:44] Koyomi**
That's correct.
**[05:45] Koyomi**
You're right.
**[05:47] Koyomi**
But you aren't strong.
**[05:48] Karen**
I am strong...
**[05:49] Karen**
Stronger than you, if nothing else.
**[05:51] Koyomi**
Physically strong means nothing.
**[05:54] Koyomi**
To be the real thing,
**[05:56] Koyomi**
you need a strong will.
**[05:58] Koyomi**
When you say you can't forgive Kaiki,
where is your will?
**[06:03] Koyomi**
You two are always trying to help others.
**[06:06] Koyomi**
You're always doing it for someone else.
**[06:08] Koyomi**
There's no will of your own there.
**[06:10] Karen**
No!
**[06:11] Karen**
We're doing what we think is right.
**[06:15] Karen**
Everyone else is just the reason.
**[06:17] Koyomi**
Don't make me laugh!
**[06:19] Koyomi**
How can someone who seeks
**[06:20] ---**
a reason from another person be right?
**[06:23] Koyomi**
While you're forcing that reason
**[06:24] ---**
on someone else, how can
you take responsibility?
**[06:27] Koyomi**
You're not good, and you're not heroes.
**[06:31] Koyomi**
You're just kids playing a game!
***SIGN*** Fakes
**[06:34] Koyomi**
Fakes.
**[06:36] Koyomi**
You never go after evil people, just villains.
**[06:40] Koyomi**
Am I wrong?
**[06:41] Karen**
You are!
**[06:42] Karen**
You don't know anything, so shut up.
**[06:44] Karen**
Tsubasa-san would understand...
**[06:47] Karen**
She knows everything!
**[06:49] Koyomi**
She doesn't know everything.
**[06:51] Koyomi**
All she knows
**[06:53] Koyomi**
is what she knows.
**[06:55] Koyomi**
If you can't give up the idea of self-sacrifice
and be content with self-satisfaction,
**[06:59] Koyomi**
you need to shut up.
**[07:00] Koyomi**
It gives me a headache to hear you talk.
**[07:03] Karen**
What's wrong with doing
something for someone else?
**[07:06] Karen**
What's wrong with self-sacrifice?
**[07:08] Karen**
Even if... Even if we're fakes,
what's wrong with that?
**[07:13] Karen**
Has it ever caused any trouble for you?!
**[07:16] Koyomi**
For a long time now.
**[07:18] Koyomi**
But...
**[07:21] Koyomi**
I never said it was wrong.
**[07:24] Koyomi**
If you're prepared to live with a sense
of inferiority for the rest of your life,
**[07:27] Koyomi**
then even if you're a fake,
isn't that the same as being real?
**[07:31] Koyomi**
Just so we're clear, I hate you two.
**[07:34] Koyomi**
But I'm always proud of you.
**[07:37] Karen**
Nii-chan.
**[07:38] Koyomi**
You said he made you mad, right?
**[07:41] Koyomi**
I heard you...
**[07:43] Koyomi**
However, I'm much madder...
**[07:47] Koyomi**
He hurt something I'm
proud of, and he'll pay.
**[07:49] Koyomi**
Leave the rest to me!
**[07:51] Karen**
I'm mad, but I also feel pathetic.
**[07:54] Karen**
Making you clean up after my mess...
**[07:56] Koyomi**
You can't even clean up your own sweat.
Don't worry about it.
**[08:00] Koyomi**
Cleaning up after their
**[08:01] ---**
little sister is an honor for a big brother.
**[08:05] Koyomi**
This time, I'll show you being cool.
**[08:08] Koyomi**
Make sure you don't fall in love.
**[08:10] Koyomi**
It'd be incestuous...
**[08:12] Karen**
I'm already in love, Nii-chan.
**[08:17] Karen**
You take care of the rest.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** 7/30 Sunday
***SIGN*** After that, I carried Karen home on my back.
I don't think she'll be running off again,
but just in case, I wrote "Any man will do"
on her face with permanent marker, so she can't leave.
(While I was at it, I wrote "Wearing a bra is a pain,
so I'm not" on Tsukihi's. She shares responsibility, too.)
Then I went to meet up with Senjougahara again. Then...
**[08:29] Kaiki**
Aren't you the one I met in front
of the Gaen child's house?
***SIGN*** Fine-ground and Deep-roasted
**[08:35] Kaiki**
You're here about your sister?
***SIGN*** Naughty Ferris Wheel
**[08:37] Kaiki**
A very manly child, then.
Rare these days.
**[08:42] Kaiki**
Your charm is gone, Senjougahara.
**[08:46] Kaiki**
You've become a normal girl.
**[08:48] Suruga**
What?
**[08:49] Suruga**
I never wanted to see you again.
**[08:52] Suruga**
Actually, that's a lie.
**[08:54] Suruga**
I never wanted to see you in the first place.
**[08:59] Suruga**
But I can say this now...
**[09:04] Suruga**
I've been wanting to see you, Kaiki-san.
**[09:06] Kaiki**
I didn't want to see you,
**[09:08] Kaiki**
now that you're just a normal girl.
***SIGN*** Naughty Ferris Wheel
**[09:12] Kaiki**
The last time we met,
you shone like darkness.
**[09:16] Kaiki**
No, better to say you'd attained
a level of enlightenment.
**[09:19] Kaiki**
Someone well worth deceiving...
**[09:21] Kaiki**
Stop. Let's talk.
**[09:23] Kaiki**
I've come to talk.
**[09:25] Kaiki**
So did you, right?
**[09:27] Kaiki**
Am I wrong?
**[09:30] Kaiki**
Very well. I get it...
**[09:33] Kaiki**
I'll stop cheating the middle schoolers.
**[09:35] Kaiki**
And I won't spread the charms anymore.
**[09:40] Kaiki**
And that lively little girl,
**[09:42] ---**
your sister... Don't worry
about her, Araragi.
**[09:46] Kaiki**
It's called instant hypnosis.
**[09:49] Kaiki**
She'll recover her health within
the next three days.
**[09:52] Kaiki**
And, Senjougahara...
**[09:54] Kaiki**
I'll officially apologize for what
happened with your mother.
**[09:58] Kaiki**
And I'll do my best to return the money
**[10:02] ---**
taken from your father.
**[10:09] Suruga**
That's quite gracious of you...
**[10:12] Suruga**
Did you really think I'd believe it?
**[10:14] Suruga**
You don't seem repentant at all.
**[10:18] Suruga**
Not the slightest bit.
**[10:20] Kaiki**
Don't I?
**[10:21] Kaiki**
Come to think of it,
I didn't actually apologize.
**[10:25] Kaiki**
Or beg for my life.
**[10:28] Kaiki**
Sorry, very sorry, guys.
**[10:30] Kaiki**
I'm very repentant.
**[10:32] Kaiki**
Very sorry.
**[10:33] Suruga**
I'm supposed to believe that
half-hearted apology?
**[10:37] Suruga**
Every word you say is a lie.
**[10:40] Kaiki**
Perhaps.
**[10:42] Suruga**
I'd prefer if you didn't upset me.
**[10:44] Suruga**
I'm doing everything I can to hold
myself back right now.
**[10:47] Suruga**
Refraining from killing you is very difficult.
**[10:51] Kaiki**
So it seems.
**[10:52] Kaiki**
And it's in that respect that
you've become normal.
**[10:59] Kaiki**
The old you would never have held back.
**[11:03] Suruga**
I won't ask you to return the money.
**[11:06] Suruga**
That won't bring my family back.
**[11:09] Kaiki**
You won't?
**[11:11] Kaiki**
That's great.
**[11:12] Kaiki**
I go through money fast.
**[11:14] Kaiki**
I barely have any on me.
***SIGN*** A I U E O
***SIGN*** Open the
mind's eye
***SIGN*** Gotta drink the medicine. Gotta peel the apples. Hurry, gotta do it.
**[11:16] Kaiki**
If I were going to repay you,
***SIGN*** 1
8 O
7 E
***SIGN*** A 3
I 4
U 5
***SIGN*** Oh, how horrid. My beloved daughter's hands and legs are warping into something awful.
***SIGN*** Gotta sever Gotta sever Gotta join Gotta join Oh, so busy Busy
***SIGN*** Tooth
Bloomed
Bloomed
Cherry
***SIGN*** Nose Flower Flower
***SIGN*** With All My Heart
**[11:18] ---**
I'd have needed to think up a new con.
***SIGN*** Flashback
***SIGN*** Toward
intercourse
like an
animal
***SIGN*** Lust writhing atop the girl's body.
***SIGN*** Palm
***SIGN*** Rising Sun
***SIGN***
8
7
6
***SIGN*** 1 2 3 4
***SIGN*** Broken
**[11:23] Suruga**
Leave this city.
**[11:25] Suruga**
Now.
**[11:25] Kaiki**
Very well.
**[11:28] Kaiki**
What's wrong, Araragi?
**[11:29] Kaiki**
Why do you look at me with those eyes?
**[11:32] Kaiki**
I hurt your sister.
**[11:35] Kaiki**
Shouldn't I see more hatred in them?
**[11:39] Koyomi**
She got what was coming to her.
**[11:42] Koyomi**
It's her fault for getting involved
with someone like you.
**[11:45] Suruga**
That's not true.
**[11:46] Suruga**
Her mistake was coming to see me alone.
**[11:50] Suruga**
If she wanted to get me, she should have
**[11:52] ---**
come with greater numbers,
just as you have.
**[11:56] Suruga**
In most other respects, she was right.
**[12:02] Suruga**
Or, Araragi, did you decide on
your own that she is a fool,
**[12:06] Suruga**
thereby denying her?
**[12:10] Koyomi**
I think she's right. Just...
**[12:12] Kaiki**
She isn't strong?
**[12:14] Kaiki**
True, she isn't.
**[12:16] Kaiki**
But denying her kindness is a mistake.
**[12:20] Kaiki**
And...
**[12:23] Kaiki**
And without girls like that around,
**[12:25] Kaiki**
I'd be out of business as a con man.
**[12:29] Suruga**
So why is a con man like that
**[12:32] ---**
doing what I want?
**[12:34] Suruga**
It would be easy to talk me into
doing whatever you wished.
**[12:37] Suruga**
Like before.
**[12:38] Kaiki**
Senjougahara,
**[12:39] Kaiki**
you have the wrong idea about me.
**[12:42] Kaiki**
No, you have the right idea.
You merely overestimate me.
**[12:46] Kaiki**
The person you view as your enemy
**[12:49] ---**
is just a pathetic, middle-aged man.
**[12:51] Kaiki**
Even as a con man,
he's a minor and shabby one.
**[12:54] Kaiki**
Or did I seem to you like
some sort of monster?
**[12:58] Suruga**
Of course not.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[13:00] Suruga**
You're just...
**[13:04] Suruga**
...a fake.
**[13:08] Kaiki**
Yes, that's right.
**[13:09] Kaiki**
I'm a fake.
**[13:12] Kaiki**
I'm no one special.
**[13:14] Kaiki**
Nor are you.
**[13:16] Kaiki**
There's nothing dramatic about me
**[13:18] Kaiki**
or about you.
**[13:21] Kaiki**
Araragi, what about you?
**[13:24] Kaiki**
I'd like to ask you a question.
***SIGN*** Naughty Ferris Wheel
**[13:27] Kaiki**
Is your life dramatic?
***SIGN*** Tragic
**[13:30] Kaiki**
Tragic?
***SIGN*** Comedic
**[13:31] Kaiki**
Musical?
***SIGN*** Musical
**[13:33] Kaiki**
I feel an unpleasant presence
from your shadow.
**[13:37] Kaiki**
And it appears
**[13:38] ---**
you've taken half of your
sister's pain onto yourself.
**[13:42] Kaiki**
Madness...
**[13:43] Kaiki**
To do something so risky for no money.
**[13:47] Koyomi**
Which are you?
**[13:50] Kaiki**
Which am I?
**[13:51] Koyomi**
Do you know about the supernatural?
**[13:55] Kaiki**
That's a less interesting question
than I expected...
**[13:58] Kaiki**
You're ruining my fun, Araragi.
**[14:00] Kaiki**
For example, do you believe in ghosts?
**[14:03] Kaiki**
You understand the mind of someone
**[14:05] ---**
who doesn't believe in ghosts,
**[14:07] ---**
but is still scared of them, right?
**[14:09] Kaiki**
I'm something similar.
**[14:11] Kaiki**
So let me answer your question this way...
**[14:14] Kaiki**
I know nothing about the supernatural.
**[14:16] Kaiki**
But I know those who do know.
**[14:19] Kaiki**
That is all.
**[14:21] Kaiki**
More precisely, I simply know
those who think they know.
**[14:28] Kaiki**
The wreathe-fire bee.
**[14:30] Kaiki**
Ever heard of the wreathe-fire bee?
**[14:33] Koyomi**
A monster from around the 15th century
or something, wasn't it?
**[14:36] Koyomi**
When a strange plague was explained
**[14:37] ---**
as the work of a supernatural monster.
**[14:40] Kaiki**
Correct.
**[14:41] Kaiki**
However, wrong.
**[14:43] Kaiki**
The wreathe-fire bee is a monster
recorded in Chapter 15
***SIGN*** Wreathe-Fire Bee
***SIGN*** 18th-Century Work
**[14:47] ---**
of the 18th-century work,
***SIGN*** Illustrated Codex of
Eastern Disturbances, Chapter 15
**[14:49] ---**
*The Illustrated Codex of Eastern Disturbances*.
**[14:51] Kaiki**
However, the truth of the matter
**[14:53] ---**
is that there was no such plague
during the Muromachi era.
***SIGN*** Falsified History Bee
**[14:58] Kaiki**
Falsified history.
**[15:00] Kaiki**
Those who came after the author
**[15:02] ---**
foolishly believed the tale he'd written.
**[15:07] Koyomi**
My sister...
**[15:10] Koyomi**
My sister who was stung by
the wreathe-fire bee...
***SIGN*** Any Man Will Do.
***SIGN*** Wearing a bra is a pain, so I'm not
**[15:15] Koyomi**
Is it true that she'll recover,
even if we do nothing?
**[15:17] Kaiki**
Of course.
**[15:18] Kaiki**
There are no monsters.
***SIGN*** Victim
**[15:21] Kaiki**
And thus, no victims.
***SIGN*** Monster
**[15:23] Kaiki**
You think that they exist,
**[15:26] Kaiki**
so you feel like they're there.
**[15:28] Kaiki**
Let me be clear...
**[15:31] Kaiki**
Don't involve me in your delusions.
**[15:35] Kaiki**
It's a nuisance.
**[15:39] Koyomi**
*He's a fake.*
**[15:42] Koyomi**
*Just like Senjougahara said*
**[15:43] Koyomi**
*and he said,*
**[15:45] Koyomi**
*he's decided to live his entire life
with a sense of inferiority.*
**[15:48] Koyomi**
*A proud fake.*
**[15:50] Kaiki**
And you've taken half of it upon yourself.
**[15:53] Kaiki**
It may not even take three days.
**[15:56] Kaiki**
I don't know how you did it,
but that's impressive.
**[16:00] Kaiki**
But that means, Araragi,
***SIGN*** Naughty Ferris Wheel
**[16:02] Kaiki**
that you and I will never
accept one another.
**[16:06] Kaiki**
It's far worse than water and oil.
**[16:08] Kaiki**
We're fire and oil.
**[16:09] Koyomi**
Who's fire and who's oil?
**[16:12] Kaiki**
I don't know.
**[16:13] Kaiki**
Since neither of us really seems like fire,
**[16:15] Kaiki**
why not rubidium and water instead?
**[16:19] Kaiki**
And I'm the rubidium.
**[16:21] Koyomi**
So I'm water?
**[16:23] Koyomi**
Then the fire is Karen and Tsukihi.
**[16:27] Koyomi**
Fire and fire...
**[16:28] Koyomi**
Together, they become an inferno,
**[16:29] Koyomi**
the Fire Sisters.
**[16:31] Suruga**
Your phone.
**[16:34] Suruga**
Give me your phone.
**[16:41] Kaiki**
That was horrible of you.
**[16:43] Kaiki**
Now I won't be able to help those
poor middle schoolers...
**[16:47] Kaiki**
I wouldn't know how to reach them.
**[16:51] Suruga**
I'm not asking you to help kids
I don't even know.
**[16:55] Suruga**
Araragi-kun, I'm about to say the
most horrible thing in the world.
**[17:03] Suruga**
It's their fault for being tricked.
**[17:07] Suruga**
I'm not a hero or a good guy.
**[17:09] Suruga**
I'm just an enemy of evil.
**[17:13] Suruga**
You can't do anything for the victims, anyway.
**[17:16] Suruga**
Even if you tried,
**[17:18] ---**
you'd only end up stealing more from them.
**[17:21] Kaiki**
I'm sure I would.
**[17:23] Kaiki**
I'm a con man.
**[17:24] Kaiki**
The whole atonement thing
was a lie, as well.
**[17:26] Kaiki**
You probably don't want to understand this,
**[17:28] Kaiki**
but for me, making money isn't
a matter of profit and loss.
**[17:32] Suruga**
That's the part of you...
**[17:35] Kaiki**
The "part of me" you what?
**[17:39] Kaiki**
No answer?
**[17:40] Kaiki**
You really have grown up to be boring...
**[17:44] Kaiki**
Dramatic or not, you used to be wonderful.
**[17:48] Kaiki**
And now you're just boring.
**[17:51] Kaiki**
Heavier and fatter, though.
**[17:53] Suruga**
Shut up.
**[17:55] Suruga**
I don't care what you say about the old me.
**[17:57] Suruga**
But don't insult me as I am now.
**[18:00] Suruga**
Araragi-kun says he loves me.
**[18:04] Suruga**
He loves me as I am now.
**[18:06] Suruga**
Therefore, I like me as I am, too.
**[18:09] Suruga**
So I cannot ignore anything you
say that would damage me.
**[18:13] Kaiki**
What?
**[18:15] Kaiki**
So you two are like that.
**[18:17] Kaiki**
I see... I see.
**[18:18] Kaiki**
So that's it...
**[18:20] Kaiki**
Then I've nothing more to say.
**[18:22] Kaiki**
I don't wish to interfere with
a budding relationship.
**[18:24] Kaiki**
If you're not going to ask for it,
I won't attempt to atone.
**[18:27] Kaiki**
I don't want to do anything that
won't get me any money.
**[18:30] Kaiki**
I'll leave town.
**[18:33] Kaiki**
I'll be gone tomorrow.
**[18:35] Kaiki**
That's good enough, isn't it, Senjougahara?
**[18:37] Kaiki**
Oh, yes... Senjougahara.
**[18:39] Kaiki**
Let me tell you something.
**[18:41] Suruga**
I don't want to hear it.
**[18:42] Kaiki**
The man who once tried to rape you...
**[18:45] Kaiki**
He was hit by a car and died.
**[18:47] Kaiki**
In a place that had nothing to do with you,
**[18:49] Kaiki**
in a way that had nothing to do with you.
**[18:52] Kaiki**
And with no drama at all.
**[18:55] Kaiki**
That's all there is to the past that
**[18:58] ---**
you spend so much time worrying about.
**[19:00] Kaiki**
There's nothing even worth settling.
**[19:04] Kaiki**
The lesson for you here is not to expect
anything dramatic from life.
**[19:08] Suruga**
That's another lie, of course.
**[19:10] Suruga**
The man who'd forgotten about me
until this morning
**[19:12] ---**
wouldn't know a thing about the
man who tried to rape me.
**[19:16] Kaiki**
Senjougahara, try to see past
the surface of things.
**[19:20] Kaiki**
It's possible that the fact that I'd forgotten
**[19:23] ---**
about you was a lie, right?
**[19:26] Suruga**
A lie...
**[19:27] Suruga**
That's a lie.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[19:28] Kaiki**
Does it matter if it's a lie?
**[19:30] Kaiki**
There's no such thing as truth in this world.
**[19:33] Kaiki**
Don't worry.
**[19:35] Kaiki**
The fact that you were once in love with me
**[19:37] Kaiki**
doesn't count as cheating.
**[19:40] Kaiki**
It isn't fair to me if you hate me,
in an attempt
**[19:43] ---**
at loyalty to your current lover.
**[19:46] Kaiki**
I'll say it again.
**[19:47] Kaiki**
The past is merely the past.
**[19:49] Kaiki**
There's no value in overcoming it
or catching up to it.
**[19:52] Kaiki**
A woman like you shouldn't be bound
by such stupid emotions.
**[19:56] Kaiki**
Just be happy with the man you have.
**[19:59] Kaiki**
Farewell.
**[20:04] Koyomi**
You fell in love with him?
**[20:06] Suruga**
What was that?
**[20:08] Suruga**
Araragi-kun, did you just attempt
**[20:10] ---**
to confirm the virginity of
the girl you're dating?
**[20:13] Suruga**
Of course not.
**[20:15] Suruga**
That would never happen.
**[20:16] Suruga**
He's simply mistaken.
**[20:18] Suruga**
What an insult.
**[20:20] Suruga**
Disgusting...
**[20:21] Suruga**
But at that time,
**[20:24] ---**
anyone who attempted to save me
would have seemed a prince,
**[20:27] Suruga**
no matter what kind of person they were.
**[20:30] Suruga**
I won't deny that I did feel somewhat
positively toward that con man.
**[20:35] Suruga**
He was still the first...
**[20:37] Suruga**
I've discussed this before,
so I won't dwell on it.
**[20:41] Suruga**
If anyone other than you had saved me,
**[20:45] Suruga**
it's possible I would've fallen
in love with them, too.
**[20:50] Suruga**
When I think about that, it infuriates me.
**[20:53] Suruga**
I'm so glad you were the one who did...
**[20:57] Koyomi**
Oshino would say that you just
got saved by yourself.
**[21:02] Suruga**
Possibly.
**[21:03] Suruga**
Let's go home.
**[21:04] Suruga**
It's getting late.
**[21:06] Koyomi**
Oh, right, Senjougahara...
**[21:08] Koyomi**
Before we leave, tell me
that request you had.
**[21:11] Koyomi**
What are you going to make me do?
**[21:14] Suruga**
Nothing special.
**[21:15] Suruga**
I didn't need that con man to tell me.
**[21:17] Suruga**
It's possible that my past isn't
worth settling things with.
**[21:22] Suruga**
But I just did.
**[21:28] Suruga**
That's what I think.
**[21:31] Koyomi**
Settled, huh?
**[21:32] Suruga**
Compliment me.
**[21:33] Koyomi**
That's your request?
**[21:37] Suruga**
No.
**[21:38] Suruga**
A compliment from someone like you means
**[21:40] ---**
absolutely nothing to me.
**[21:42] Suruga**
But you seem to have forgotten
to fulfill your obvious duty.
**[21:47] Suruga**
I simply reminded you.
**[21:48] Koyomi**
Really, are you made of iron or something?
**[21:51] Suruga**
Iron?
**[21:53] Suruga**
Of course not.
**[21:54] Suruga**
I am a soft, cute girl.
**[21:57] Suruga**
After everything that scum said to me,
I am terribly hurt.
**[22:02] Suruga**
I can barely stand...
**[22:05] Koyomi**
Liar.
**[22:06] Koyomi**
Are you a con artist, too?
**[22:07] Suruga**
It's true.
**[22:09] Suruga**
So...
**[22:13] Suruga**
Be gentle to me tonight.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[22:21] Koyomi**
The next day,
**[22:23] Koyomi**
without even waiting for the
three days Kaiki had stated,
**[22:27] Koyomi**
Karen had recovered.
**[22:31] Koyomi**
After that, I gave a general explanation
to Karen and Tsukihi.
**[22:35] Koyomi**
That Kaiki was gone from the city.
**[22:37] Koyomi**
And thus, there would be no more victims.
**[22:41] Karen**
Nii-chan, we'll be gone for a bit.
**[22:44] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan, we'll be gone for a while.
**[22:46] Koyomi**
Where are you two yuri sisters going?
**[22:48] Karen**
Even with the con man gone,
**[22:50] ---**
that doesn't mean the charms
will just disappear.
**[22:52] Karen**
And the damage they did
**[22:54] ---**
to people's relationships won't heal itself.
**[22:56] Karen**
The fact that there are no more victims
**[22:58] ---**
doesn't help the victims already there.
**[23:01] Tsukihi**
So we want to start cleaning up the mess.
**[23:05] Koyomi**
Don't let your game get out of hand.
**[23:09] Karen**
It's not a game, Nii-chan!
**[23:12] Tsukihi**
We're not good guys.
**[23:13] ---**
We're goodness itself, Onii-chan.
**[23:15] Tsukihi**
Bye!
**[23:18] Koyomi**
*My prides.*
**[23:19] Koyomi**
*My little sisters I'm so proud of.*
**[23:21] Koyomi**
*Fakes...*
**[23:23] Koyomi**
*But because of that, closer than
anything to the real thing.*
**[23:26] Koyomi**
*The Fire Sisters ran out of the house*
**[23:30] Koyomi**
*like a lit firecracker.*
# E8 - Tsukihi Phoenix, Part One
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR49G1P06/tsukihi-phoenix-part-1)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Koyomi**
Let's end our story by revealing
**[00:04] ---**
the true identity of Araragi Tsukihi.
**[00:09] Tsukihi**
*You're always like that, Onii-chan.*
**[00:11] Tsukihi**
*You treat Karen-chan and me like kids.*
**[00:15] Koyomi**
The story of my bratty and annoying
**[00:17] ---**
littler little sister will bring these episodes
**[00:19] ---**
of my beloved companions and me to a close.
**[00:22] Tsukihi**
*How come you don't know?*
**[00:25] Tsukihi**
*I'm platinum mad!*
**[00:27] Koyomi**
Araragi Tsukihi.
**[00:28] Koyomi**
One of the Fire Sisters.
**[00:30] Koyomi**
The younger little sister.
**[00:31] Koyomi**
The littler little sister.
**[00:33] Koyomi**
Second year, in middle school.
**[00:34] Koyomi**
Born in April.
**[00:35] Koyomi**
Age 14.
**[00:36] Koyomi**
Blood type B.
**[00:36] Koyomi**
A hysteric.
**[00:37] Tsukihi**
*I don't want to hear that from you.*
**[00:40] Koyomi**
Sly.
**[00:41] Tsukihi**
*You can be mad at Karen-chan,*
**[00:43] ---**
*but please don't get mad at me.*
**[00:45] Koyomi**
Prone to heights of emotion.
**[00:46] Tsukihi**
*Huh?*
**[00:47] Tsukihi**
*Onii-chan, where's that girl?*
***SIGN***
**[00:50] Koyomi**
And immortal, too.
**[00:51] Koyomi**
This is the story of just another fake.
***SIGN*** Episode 8: Tsukihi Phoenix, Part 1
***SIGN*** August 14th Monday Morning
***SIGN*** Sole
**[02:59] Tsukihi**
Nii-chan, is there anything
you want me to do?
**[03:03] Koyomi**
No.
**[03:04] Tsukihi**
There must be something, right?
**[03:09] Tsukihi**
Come on, Nii-chan...
**[03:11] Tsukihi**
I want to be useful to you.
**[03:14] Tsukihi**
I may not look it, but I'm a
very helpful little sister...
**[03:17] Tsukihi**
A dedicated little sister...
**[03:19] Tsukihi**
A little sister ready to serve you!
**[03:21] Koyomi**
Nothing...
**[03:22] Koyomi**
There's nothing!
**[03:23] Koyomi**
There's nothing I would want my sister
to do this early in the morning!
**[03:27] Koyomi**
There's nothing I want you to do for me,
**[03:30] Koyomi**
and there's nothing you can do...
**[03:33] Koyomi**
As you can see, I'm trying
to concentrate on studying.
***SIGN*** English Drills
**[03:36] Koyomi**
I don't have time to play with
a lower life form like you,
**[03:40] Koyomi**
you single-celled organism!
**[03:42] Koyomi**
If you're bored, go run through the fields.
**[03:45] Koyomi**
You don't have to come back...
**[03:54] Koyomi**
Um...
**[03:59] Koyomi**
Araragi Karen, my sister, is wearing a skirt.
**[04:14] Koyomi**
*Who is this pretty girl?*
**[04:18] Koyomi**
Karen-chan!
**[04:19] Koyomi**
If someone's bullying you, tell me!
**[04:24] Koyomi**
Why didn't you talk to me
**[04:26] Koyomi**
before this terrible thing happened?
**[04:28] Karen**
No, nobody's bullying me.
**[04:30] Karen**
If anyone is, it's you, Nii-chan.
**[04:35] Karen**
I can laugh about this now.
**[04:37] Karen**
But some of your thoughtless words
**[04:39] ---**
almost drove me to suicide when
I was in elementary school.
**[04:44] Karen**
That was the start of my
attempts to be a hero.
**[04:48] Karen**
The hatred for evil in my heart
is something you created.
**[04:52] Koyomi**
But... But, Karen-chan...
**[04:55] Koyomi**
If no one's threatening you,
**[04:57] Koyomi**
there's no way you would dress like this!
**[05:01] Koyomi**
Don't worry, Karen-chan.
**[05:03] Koyomi**
I'll do something.
**[05:05] Koyomi**
Leave it all to your big brother.
**[05:08] Koyomi**
Let's start by giving me
**[05:09] ---**
the addresses and cell phone numbers
of whoever is bullying you.
**[05:11] Koyomi**
And then the names of any teachers
who let them get away with it!
**[05:15] Koyomi**
I'll make them all pay!
**[05:19] Karen**
Sometimes, Nii-chan,
you're hotter than fire.
**[05:23] Karen**
I'm in love.
**[05:27] Koyomi**
Oh, I get it... It's cosplay.
**[05:29] Karen**
Don't call a girl wearing a skirt "cosplay"!
**[05:33] Karen**
Even I
**[05:35] Karen**
get a little hurt.
**[05:37] Karen**
That's the kind of stuff that
**[05:39] ---**
made me want to kill myself
in middle school.
**[05:42] Koyomi**
So, there was a time when even
you were delicate, huh?
**[05:47] Koyomi**
If it isn't cosplay, and you aren't
being bullied, what is it?
**[05:50] Karen**
Well, I was wondering if it was cute...
**[05:58] Koyomi**
Then I don't know what to say...
**[06:02] Karen**
It's cute, isn't it?
**[06:04] Koyomi**
S-Sure is cute...
**[06:22] Koyomi**
K-Karen-chan...
**[06:24] Karen**
Thank you!
**[06:25] Karen**
I'm so happy you complimented me, Nii-chan!
**[06:28] Karen**
I'm so happy. So happy... Yay!
**[06:32] Karen**
I just feel so relaxed when I'm
hanging on to Nii-chan...
**[06:36] Karen**
It just feels so good,
giving you a big hug like this!
**[06:41] Karen**
This must be how a
Tempur-Pedic pillow feels!
**[06:44] Koyomi**
Stop it! It feels creepy.
**[06:46] Koyomi**
Creepy! Creepy! Creepy!
**[06:48] Koyomi**
I'm sorry.
**[06:48] Koyomi**
It really, really, really feels creepy.
**[06:50] Koyomi**
Get away from me!
**[06:52] Koyomi**
What is this?
**[06:53] Koyomi**
What did I do to you?
**[06:55] Koyomi**
Karen-chan, what is the meaning of all this?
**[06:58] Karen**
I don't know how to answer that...
**[07:00] Karen**
I know. From now on, I've decided
**[07:02] ---**
to be a good little sister, who loves her
brother and would never disobey him.
**[07:06] Koyomi**
I don't want that!
**[07:08] Koyomi**
And I think that character
would overlap with Kanbaru!
**[07:12] Karen**
Kanbaru.
**[07:19] Koyomi**
Um... Karen-chan.
**[07:22] Koyomi**
Kanbaru is my junior by one year.
**[07:25] Karen**
Yes...
**[07:26] Karen**
Kanbaru Suruga.
**[07:28] Koyomi**
*Huh?*
**[07:30] Koyomi**
*I didn't say her full name yet, did I?*
**[07:34] ---**
Karen-chan.
**[07:35] Karen**
Nii-chan, I have a request!
**[07:41] Karen**
Would you please introduce
**[07:42] ---**
your little sister to Kanbaru-sensei?
**[07:46] Koyomi**
Well, come to think of it,
**[07:48] ---**
martial arts is a type of sport, isn't it?
**[07:51] Koyomi**
I guess it makes perfect sense that you'd know
**[07:54] ---**
a local star and national-level
player like Kanbaru.
**[07:57] Karen**
Please, Nii-chan...
**[07:59] Karen**
Nay, Onii-sama.
**[08:01] Koyomi**
Don't say "nay."
**[08:03] Karen**
Aye, sir.
**[08:04] Koyomi**
That's a good answer, but...
**[08:06] Karen**
I'm so honored that you'd step on me...
**[08:09] Koyomi**
And I'm seriously sick of seeing you bow.
**[08:13] Koyomi**
Don't bow every time something happens.
**[08:15] Koyomi**
Just so you know,
**[08:16] ---**
in modern society, bowing is
a form of violence!
**[08:20] Karen**
Got it! Then I'll lick your feet.
**[08:22] ---**
I'll start with the big toe,
and work my way down!
**[08:24] Koyomi**
That's why I'm telling you to stop!
**[08:29] Karen**
Fine... Then I'll give you my virginity.
**[08:32] Karen**
I'll give you my virginity, Nii-chan!
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[08:39] Koyomi**
I don't want my little sister's virginity!
**[08:49] Koyomi**
I guess I should ask about this.
**[08:51] Koyomi**
Karen-chan, you don't act like
this outside, do you?
**[08:54] Koyomi**
With your friends, or classmates,
**[08:56] ---**
or teachers at school?
**[08:58] Karen**
Of course not.
**[09:00] Karen**
Everyone looks up to me.
**[09:03] Koyomi**
Anyway, I'm amazed Tsukihi-chan
loaned you those clothes.
**[09:07] Koyomi**
You're gonna stretch the fabric
if you wear them.
**[09:09] Karen**
That's why I took them quietly...
**[09:12] Koyomi**
*She's gonna get mad at you later.*
**[09:14] Koyomi**
*She's scarier than you are.*
**[09:16] Karen**
I hate to say this after you complimented me,
**[09:18] ---**
but skirts don't seem to match my skin.
**[09:23] Karen**
But this miniskirt works great for kicking.
**[09:27] Koyomi**
By the way, Karen-chan,
**[09:29] Koyomi**
how did you learn I was friends with Kanbaru?
**[09:32] Karen**
Oh, the unofficial Kanbaru-sensei
fan club, Kanbaru Tool,
**[09:36] ---**
sent me a newsletter with lots
of pictures of you in it.
***SIGN*** Kanbaru Tool
This is the unofficial fan club,
made by your host,
a huge Kanbaru Suruga fan.
It is unofficial.
There are no dues.
It's a place for comrades
who secretly love
Kanbaru Suruga to gather.
!!No trolling!!
**[09:44] Koyomi**
She didn't know you guys took
those pictures, did she?!
**[09:46] Karen**
And then my own investigations revealed
**[09:49] ---**
that she looks up to you like a teacher.
**[09:52] Koyomi**
Well, that's true, I guess.
**[09:55] Karen**
I think this must be some
kind of karma, Nii-chan.
**[09:58] Karen**
Would you please introduce
me to Kanbaru-sensei?
**[10:02] Koyomi**
Karma, huh?
**[10:08] Karen**
It may sound odd to say this,
**[10:10] ---**
but I think Kanbaru-sensei and
I would get along!
**[10:15] Koyomi**
But I have no intention of introducing
my sister to Kanbaru.
**[10:19] Koyomi**
There's a reason I can't.
**[10:20] Koyomi**
It's because I know her sexual proclivities,
**[10:24] ---**
of which most people are unaware.
**[10:29] Koyomi**
Karen-chan.
**[10:31] Karen**
What is it, Nii-chan?
**[10:32] Koyomi**
Give it up.
**[10:38] Karen**
Now, let's talk, Nii-chan.
**[10:42] Karen**
You're telling me you can't do a favor
for your wonderful little sister?
**[10:45] Karen**
Then I have my own idea.
**[10:49] Koyomi**
I-If bowing doesn't get you what you want,
you immediately resort to violence?
**[10:53] Koyomi**
No way...
**[10:54] Koyomi**
Seriously impossible!
**[10:56] Karen**
Impossible?!
**[10:57] Karen**
Then what am I supposed to do, Nii-chan?
**[10:59] Karen**
Is there some way to get through
to you, besides talking?
**[11:04] Koyomi**
Then we need to have a game...
**[11:08] Koyomi**
If we fight, we have a game.
**[11:09] Koyomi**
That's our rule.
**[11:11] Koyomi**
And just so we're clear, it won't be fair.
**[11:17] Koyomi**
This is just your request.
There's nothing in this for me.
**[11:20] Koyomi**
Karen-chan, this game won't be fair.
**[11:22] ---**
I'll have a huge advantage.
**[11:25] Karen**
Okay, that works.
**[11:28] Karen**
I guess you understand.
**[11:30] Karen**
Sure, you can choose
whatever rules you like.
**[11:33] Karen**
To meet Kanbaru-sensei,
**[11:36] Karen**
I'll pass any test!
**[11:48] Karen**
Wait a second.
**[11:49] Karen**
I'll get the tools ready.
**[12:00] Karen**
Nii-chan, that was fast.
***SIGN*** Closed
**[12:06] Karen**
Nii-chan?
**[12:08] Karen**
That's my toothbrush you're holding, isn't it?
**[12:14] Karen**
Y-You're not...
**[12:17] Karen**
Nii-chan?
**[12:19] Karen**
You're going to stick that toothbrush
**[12:22] Karen**
up my butt?!
**[12:27] Karen**
That's my brother...
**[12:29] Karen**
Terrifying!
**[12:33] Koyomi**
No, your brother isn't going to
think up anything that terrifying.
**[12:37] Koyomi**
Karen-chan,
**[12:38] Koyomi**
a toothbrush is for brushing teeth.
**[12:42] Karen**
Nii-chan,
**[12:43] Karen**
you may be right, and a toothbrush
may be for brushing teeth.
**[12:46] ---**
But what of it?
**[12:48] Karen**
You aren't going to tell me to brush
my teeth here, are you?
**[12:51] Koyomi**
No.
**[12:52] Koyomi**
No, I'm not.
**[12:53] Koyomi**
I won't have you brush them.
**[12:55] Koyomi**
I'm going to brush them.
**[12:59] Koyomi**
And I'm not going to brush my teeth.
**[13:03] Koyomi**
I'm going to brush your teeth.
**[13:06] Karen**
Um, I don't understand.
**[13:08] Karen**
You're going to brush my teeth?
**[13:11] Karen**
How is that a game?
**[13:16] Koyomi**
You and Tsukihi-chan get your hair cut
at a beauty parlor, right?
**[13:19] Koyomi**
But I don't really like those.
**[13:23] Koyomi**
I get nervous when someone I don't know
**[13:25] ---**
touches my head.
**[13:27] Karen**
Yeah, I only want the stylists
I know cutting mine.
**[13:32] Koyomi**
Psychologically, you have to be fairly close
**[13:35] ---**
to someone before you'd allow
them to touch your hair.
**[13:38] Koyomi**
I've heard that some girls are more against
**[13:41] ---**
having their hair touched than their bodies
**[13:45] Karen**
What of it?
**[13:46] Koyomi**
It's called "touching."
**[13:48] Koyomi**
The most obvious example is hair-cutting.
**[13:51] Koyomi**
Another example is tooth-brushing.
**[13:55] Koyomi**
A moment ago, you didn't
think it was a big deal.
**[13:58] ---**
But usually, having someone else brush
your teeth is out of the question.
**[14:02] Koyomi**
Normally, you can do it yourself,
and normally, you do.
**[14:07] Koyomi**
In other words, Karen-chan,
**[14:09] ---**
having someone else brush your teeth
**[14:11] ---**
generates major psychological resistance.
**[14:15] Koyomi**
If you can withstand
**[14:17] ---**
that psychological resistance for
five minutes, you win.
**[14:21] Koyomi**
If you do, I'll introduce you to Kanbaru.
**[14:24] Koyomi**
If you cry uncle before the
five minutes are up, I win.
**[14:27] Koyomi**
And I won't introduce you...
**[14:32] Karen**
Is that all?
**[14:33] Karen**
You made such a big deal out of it,
**[14:36] ---**
even I was starting to get a little scared.
**[14:38] Karen**
I'm a bit disappointed.
**[14:40] Koyomi**
Are you?
**[14:41] Karen**
Sure! It sounds great to me.
**[14:44] Karen**
I mean, I wouldn't want a
total stranger doing it,
**[14:48] ---**
but you'll be doing it. Right, Nii-chan?
**[14:50] Karen**
Then I'll be fine.
**[14:53] Karen**
I'll clarify this.
**[14:54] ---**
No matter what you do to me,
I won't be embarrassed.
**[14:59] Koyomi**
If I give up before time expires, you win.
**[15:03] Karen**
For an introduction to the
great Kanbaru-sensei,
**[15:06] ---**
I think this is a bit too easy.
**[15:09] Karen**
Actually, I'd hoped for something
more challenging.
**[15:14] Koyomi**
Okay, then we can start, right?
**[15:17] Koyomi**
Sit down there.
**[15:18] Karen**
Okay!
**[15:27] Koyomi**
Ahhh.
**[15:29] Karen**
Ahhh.
**[15:32] Koyomi**
*Now, feel the terror*
**[15:35] ---**
*of the great Kanbaru-sensei for yourself.*
**[15:38] Koyomi**
*Kanbaru-sensei's fetishistic ideas
will lead to your defeat.*
**[15:41] Koyomi**
*You must be overjoyed.*
**[15:56] Koyomi**
*Did you just now understand?*
**[15:58] Koyomi**
*But it isn't too late, Karen-chan.*
**[16:01] Koyomi**
*I'm not messing with the
exterior of your body.*
**[16:04] ---**
*I'm messing with the interior.*
**[16:06] Koyomi**
*To simplify this,*
**[16:08] ---**
*it brings you pleasure.*
**[16:10] Koyomi**
*Thin hairs are stimulating*
**[16:12] ---**
*the delicate parts of your body,*
**[16:15] Koyomi**
*so it must feel good.*
**[16:39] Koyomi**
*Not bad...*
**[16:41] Koyomi**
*It makes me want to try harder.*
**[16:47] Koyomi**
If you give up now, Karen-chan,
you'll feel good.
**[16:51] Koyomi**
Or rather, you'll stop feeling good!
**[17:04] Koyomi**
*Oh, no...*
**[17:05] Koyomi**
*Hearing her moan makes
me feel really weird...*
**[17:10] Koyomi**
*It makes my heart race!*
***SIGN*** 3 minutes 24 seconds
***SIGN*** Tsukihi Phoenix Chapter
**[17:31] Koyomi**
*She really is cute...*
**[17:35] Koyomi**
*This is seriously bad.*
**[17:36] Koyomi**
*Was Karen always this cute?*
**[17:39] Koyomi**
*Huh? Huh? Huh?*
**[17:40] Koyomi**
*This is just a possibility,*
**[17:42] ---**
*but could my sister be the
cutest girl in the world?*
**[17:44] Koyomi**
*I've always thought Hanekawa Tsubasa
was the ideal woman,*
**[17:49] Koyomi**
*but could I have been mistaken?*
**[17:53] Koyomi**
*Even if she isn't better than Hanekawa,*
**[17:55] ---**
*she could still give her a
good run for her money.*
**[17:58] Koyomi**
*No, no, no... Wait!*
**[17:59] Koyomi**
*What am I saying?*
**[18:01] Koyomi**
*No human could match Hanekawa.*
**[18:04] Koyomi**
*This is a hallucination!*
**[18:06] Koyomi**
*This special situation is
weakening me. That's all!*
**[18:09] Koyomi**
*I know that! I know that!*
**[18:12] Koyomi**
*B-But...*
**[18:27] Koyomi**
K-Karen-chan...
**[18:39] Koyomi**
Karen-chan...
**[18:40] Koyomi**
Karen-chan...
**[18:41] Koyomi**
Karen-chan...
**[18:44] Karen**
Nii-chan...
**[18:52] Karen**
Nii-chan...
**[18:54] Karen**
It's okay.
**[19:16] Tsukihi**
What are you doing?
**[19:23] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan, Karen-chan, please tell me
what, exactly, is going on here?
**[19:27] Koyomi**
W-Wait, Tsukihi-chan!
**[19:29] Koyomi**
It's not what you think!
**[19:30] Tsukihi**
Why is my brother happily pushing Karen-chan
**[19:34] ---**
into the bed, while brushing her teeth?
**[19:38] Tsukihi**
Why is Karen-chan wearing my clothes and
**[19:42] ---**
happily smiling, while being pushed
into the bed by my brother?
**[19:47] Koyomi**
Why am I pushing my little sister into
**[19:49] ---**
the bed with a smile,
while brushing her teeth?!
**[19:53] Karen**
Why am I wearing my little sister's clothes,
**[19:55] ---**
smiling, as my big brother
pushes me into the bed?!
**[19:59] Karen**
What a surprise!
**[20:01] Karen**
Y-You saved us, Tsukihi-chan!
**[20:03] Karen**
Thank you!
**[20:14] Tsukihi**
*Would the judge be merciful?*
**[20:16] Tsukihi**
*Would there be room for
extenuating circumstances?*
**[20:19] Tsukihi**
*Let there at least be a stay of execution,*
**[20:22] ---**
*Karen-chan and I hoped.*
**[20:24] Tsukihi**
Would you two stay like that,
just for a moment?
**[20:28] Tsukihi**
I'm running to the convenience
store to buy an awl.
**[20:31] Koyomi**
*There would not be.*
**[20:33] Koyomi**
*We were given the death penalty.*
**[20:37] Karen**
Tsukihi-chan, I don't think they sell
awls at the convenience store.
**[20:41] Karen**
You'd have to go to a specialty goods store!
**[20:47] Karen**
Nii-chan, you're heavy.
**[20:49] Koyomi**
Oh, sorry.
***SIGN*** Closed
**[21:04] Karen**
So, Nii-chan, about our game...
**[21:08] Karen**
It's way past five minutes.
**[21:11] Koyomi**
Crap...
**[21:14] Koyomi**
Fine... A promise is a promise.
**[21:18] Koyomi**
Okay, Karen-chan.
**[21:20] Koyomi**
I'll introduce you to Kanbaru.
**[21:23] Koyomi**
You did well, Karen-chan.
**[21:26] Koyomi**
You win.
**[21:27] Koyomi**
I lose today.
**[21:30] Koyomi**
I'll accept it.
**[21:36] Karen**
N-Nii-chan?
**[21:38] Koyomi**
What?
**[21:39] Karen**
I-If you really insist,
and only because you insist,
**[21:44] ---**
we can go best out of three.
**[21:47] Karen**
You know, Tsukihi-chan interrupted midway.
**[21:51] Karen**
That normally means it's a tie.
**[21:54] Karen**
A-And there's still time before
Tsukihi-chan gets back...
**[21:59] Karen**
We can go into extra innings if you want.
**[22:03] ---**
*Uh...*
**[22:06] Koyomi**
O-Okay, maybe I will...
**[22:10] Karen**
Y-Yeah.
**[22:12] Karen**
Now that you've said that,
I can't turn you down.
**[22:16] Karen**
I accept... I accept your challenge!
**[22:20] Koyomi**
Th-This time, you want to do me?
**[22:24] Karen**
Y-Yeah, th-that's fairer.
**[22:30] Koyomi**
*And so, starting that morning,
Karen and I*
**[22:34] ---**
*began to get along a little better.*
# E9 - Tsukihi Phoenix, Part Two
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRJQKV03Y/tsukihi-phoenix-part-2)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Koyomi**
I decided it would be best
**[00:03] ---**
if I kept my promise as soon as I could.
**[00:06] Koyomi**
And after barely escaping Tsukihi's awls,
**[00:09] Koyomi**
I called Kanbaru's phone.
***SIGN*** Kanbaru Suruga
**[00:14] Suruga**
Araragi-sempai, I'd really prefer that you not.
**[00:17] Suruga**
It's true that I said I wanted to meet your sister,
**[00:21] Suruga**
but that was a joke.
**[00:23] Suruga**
Temporary Shutdown
**[00:25] Suruga**
I wasn't serious.
**[00:28] Suruga**
No, well...
**[00:29] Suruga**
Araragi-sempai,
**[00:30] Suruga**
I mean, I'm really grateful for your kindness.
**[00:34] Suruga**
But I can't take your little sister's virginity!
***SIGN*** charge forward
**[00:39] Koyomi**
I'm not giving it to you!
**[00:40] Koyomi**
I'd rather take it myself than give it to you!
**[00:42] Suruga**
The thought's enough for me.
**[00:44] Koyomi**
Don't take the thought, either...
**[00:45] Koyomi**
You can't have anything of my sister's!
**[00:49] Koyomi**
And so, with some difficulty,
**[00:52] Koyomi**
I promised to bring Karen to her this afternoon.
**[00:57] Suruga**
Okay, I'll get dressed and wait for you.
**[01:01] Koyomi**
Why are you usually naked?
***SIGN*** Episode 9: Tsukihi Phoenix, Part 2
**[02:39] Karen**
Nii-chan, Nii-chan...
**[02:40] Karen**
Do you know how to win every time
at rock-paper-scissors?
**[02:53] Karen**
Just knowing how will change
**[02:56] Karen**
your rock-paper-scissors life forever.
**[02:59] Karen**
Normally, I'd just keep it to myself...
**[03:02] Karen**
But thanks to you, this is a great day.
**[03:04] Karen**
So I'll tell you specially.
**[03:08] Karen**
I haven't even told Tsukihi-chan!
**[03:13] Koyomi**
Fine, fine.
**[03:15] Koyomi**
I'll listen to it.
**[03:16] Koyomi**
Your kind, wonderful
Koyomi-oniichan will listen to you.
**[03:20] Karen**
Okay!
**[03:21] Karen**
If you're that insistent, I'll tell you.
**[03:24] Karen**
Let's try it.
**[03:25] Karen**
But you know,
**[03:27] Karen**
just learning it normally won't motivate you...
**[03:31] Karen**
We should bet something.
**[03:32] Koyomi**
Don't bother.
**[03:33] Koyomi**
It's a pain.
**[03:34] Karen**
No, we have to...
**[03:36] Karen**
Or there's a possibility that later,
you'll say, "I deliberately lost!"
**[03:42] Koyomi**
I think deliberately losing at rock-paper-scissors
is just as hard as always winning.
**[03:46] Karen**
Okay, let's do this, Niii-chan.
**[03:49] Karen**
An athletic punishment game.
**[03:50] Karen**
The loser has to carry the winner
the rest of the way.
**[03:54] Koyomi**
Carry?
**[03:55] Karen**
On their back!
***SIGN*** Carriers Get Priority
**[03:56] Karen**
Carry them all the way there.
**[03:59] Koyomi**
*Whatever.*
**[04:00] Koyomi**
*If I lose, I just have to go back on it.*
**[04:03] Koyomi**
Okay, I get it.
**[04:04] Koyomi**
That's fine.
**[04:06] Karen**
You agreed more easily than I expected.
**[04:08] Koyomi**
I'm not planning anything.
**[04:10] Koyomi**
Trust your brother.
**[04:13] Koyomi**
He'd never break his word...
**[04:18] Karen**
That's right...
**[04:20] Karen**
You're my pride!
**[04:21] Koyomi**
*I've probably broken thousands
of promises to her.*
**[04:24] Koyomi**
*Why would she trust me this much?*
**[04:26] Koyomi**
Let's go... Rock, paper—
**[04:28] Karen**
Wait, wait, wait!
**[04:30] Karen**
That's not how you do it.
**[04:33] Karen**
You have to say the words yourself.
**[04:35] Karen**
That's the first stage of the trick.
**[04:38] Koyomi**
The first stage?
**[04:39] Koyomi**
That's a lot of work to go through
for rock-paper-scissors.
**[04:42] Koyomi**
How many stages are there?
**[04:44] Karen**
Two!
***SIGN*** Mind the Step
**[04:45] Koyomi**
*Simple!*
**[04:46] Koyomi**
So what, you gain an advantage
by saying it yourself?
**[04:50] Koyomi**
Sounds kind of spiritual...
**[04:53] Koyomi**
Not that it matters.
**[04:55] Koyomi**
Then you say it.
**[04:56] Karen**
Okay!
**[04:57] Karen**
Here I go...
**[04:59] Karen**
Rock!
**[05:03] Karen**
Paper!
**[05:10] Karen**
Do you get it?
**[05:11] Karen**
Do you get it, Nii-chan?
**[05:13] Karen**
You say rock, then paper,
and then you put out your hand.
**[05:17] Karen**
Thus, you can make your opponent,
**[05:19] ---**
who was waiting for the "scissors," go late.
**[05:21] Karen**
The ultimate technique,
**[05:23] ---**
using the game's very name to
cause your opponent to go late.
**[05:26] Karen**
In other words, whether you throw
rock, paper, or scissors,
**[05:29] ---**
since you've put your fist out too late,
**[05:31] ---**
I automatically win.
**[05:34] Karen**
Now, Nii-chan, you're going to carry me!
***SIGN*** Black scene
**[05:40] Koyomi**
That's cheating.
**[05:41] Koyomi**
What kind of idiot would
admit defeat over that?!
**[05:45] Karen**
And I just thought of it, too.
**[05:47] Koyomi**
You just thought of it?
**[05:49] Koyomi**
Karen-chan, you lost because you cheated.
**[05:51] Koyomi**
Carrying me on your back isn't good enough.
**[05:53] Koyomi**
You have to carry me on your shoulders.
**[05:55] Karen**
Oh, fine...
**[05:59] Karen**
Okay, Nii-chan.
**[06:00] Karen**
Get on my shoulders.
**[06:04] Koyomi**
Um, well...
**[06:06] Koyomi**
Let's not, Karen-chan.
**[06:07] Koyomi**
I've been studying too much.
I've gained weight.
**[06:10] Karen**
How much do you weigh?
**[06:11] Koyomi**
Um, 56 kilograms.
**[06:14] Karen**
Then I'll be fine.
**[06:16] Karen**
Anything less than 180 kilos
is nothing to me.
**[06:19] Karen**
30 kg on the Moon
**[06:19] Koyomi**
Do you live on the moon?!
**[06:21] Koyomi**
P-Putting that aside,
**[06:24] Koyomi**
it's one thing if you're carrying
me on your back.
**[06:27] ---**
But on your shoulders, your ponytail
is in the way.
**[06:28] Karen**
Oh, my ponytail...
**[06:31] Karen**
That's right.
**[06:32] Koyomi**
Right?
**[06:33] Karen**
You're right!
**[06:35] Karen**
That's my brother.
**[06:37] Karen**
You're always right!
**[06:40] Koyomi**
A key?
**[06:41] Koyomi**
Why are you taking out a key now?
**[06:44] Karen**
Don't you use the ridges of a key when you
**[06:47] ---**
cut vinyl tape or tags on your clothes?
**[07:00] Karen**
It's a lot lighter!
**[07:04] Karen**
Oh, perfect. There's a trash can.
**[07:09] Karen**
Right! Now I can carry you
on my shoulders.
**[07:12] Koyomi**
You've had that ponytail since
elementary school!
**[07:15] Koyomi**
Don't you have any attachment to it?!
**[07:17] Karen**
It's long, and hard to take care of,
**[07:19] Karen**
and a pain when I'm trying to sleep.
**[07:21] ---**
And when I get up, it's a mess.
**[07:22] Karen**
I've always hated it.
**[07:24] Koyomi**
You kept it anyway?
**[07:25] Karen**
Okay, Nii-chan, let me carry you.
**[07:27] Karen**
Let me carry you... Let me carry you!
**[07:32] Koyomi**
*Why is she so excited?*
**[07:33] Koyomi**
*Why is she so excited, when she's
the one doing the carrying?*
**[07:36] Koyomi**
*My sister is totally a masochist!*
**[07:38] Koyomi**
*This is all just a punishment game for me.*
**[07:42] Koyomi**
Um...
**[07:49] Karen**
I'm standing up now.
**[07:55] Koyomi**
Scared! Scared! Scared! Scared!
**[07:57] Koyomi**
It's too high and very scary!
**[07:58] ---**
Neo-Tokyo 3
**[07:59] Koyomi**
Let me down. Let me down.
**[07:59] Koyomi**
Let me down now!
**[08:00] Koyomi**
I'm sorry! Please let me down, Karen-san!
**[08:02] Koyomi**
No, Karen-sama!
**[08:08] Karen**
Nii-chan, got a sec?
**[08:10] Koyomi**
What?
**[08:12] Karen**
Your crotch is pressing into the back of
my head, and it doesn't feel good.
**[08:16] Karen**
Well, Nii-chan?
**[08:18] Karen**
Don't you think we should
cut off your crotch,
**[08:20] ---**
like I cut off my ponytail, to be fair?
***SIGN*** Koyomi
**[08:23] Koyomi**
Too scary!
**[08:25] Koyomi**
Your hair might grow back,
**[08:26] Koyomi**
but if you cut me off down there, it's over
**[08:29] ---**
in a lot of ways for a lot of things!
**[08:31] Karen**
I see.
**[08:32] Karen**
Still, Nii-chan, the weight isn't a problem.
**[08:34] ---**
But if you move too much, it throws
me off balance. Can you stay put?
**[08:37] Koyomi**
Don't be crazy...
**[08:39] Koyomi**
I'm not like you.
**[08:40] Koyomi**
I can't keep my balance with my
head as high as a giraffe's.
**[08:43] Karen**
Oh, fine.
**[08:44] Karen**
It might take a little effort, Nii-chan,
**[08:47] ---**
but put your weight forward.
**[08:49] Karen**
Put your head out, in front of my shoulders.
***SIGN*** Right / Wrong / Shut the hell up.
**[08:52] Karen**
Then hook your legs under my arms.
**[08:55] Karen**
I'll lock them like the bar at an amusement park.
**[08:58] Koyomi**
Like this?
**[09:00] Karen**
All right!
**[09:05] Karen**
Okay, now we're fine.
**[09:09] Koyomi**
No, I'm not very fine.
**[09:13] Koyomi**
I can't move a finger.
**[09:15] Koyomi**
And my legs are going numb...
**[09:17] Koyomi**
Hey, Karen-sama,
**[09:17] Koyomi**
you don't think you've cut off
the circulation, do you?
**[09:21] Karen**
But it's easier for me.
**[09:23] Karen**
Your calves were pressing into
my breasts, and it felt weird.
**[09:28] Karen**
And your crotch was pressing into my head,
**[09:30] ---**
and I was stuck between your legs.
**[09:34] Karen**
Nii-chan, is giving someone a ride on
your shoulders always this erotic?
**[09:38] Koyomi**
No, normally the guy carries the girl.
**[09:42] Karen**
Then let's go, Nii-chan.
**[09:53] Girl**
You... Devil boy...
**[10:03] Girl**
I'd like to ask you something.
**[10:05] Girl**
Is that all right?
**[10:08] Girl**
Well... I'm looking for a place
called Eikou Cram School.
**[10:12] Girl**
Do you know where it is?
**[10:15] Koyomi**
Well...
**[10:17] Girl**
What is it, devil boy?
**[10:24] Girl**
When you were little,
**[10:28] Girl**
didn't they teach you to help others?
**[10:31] Girl**
Um...
**[10:32] Girl**
*How would an objective third
party view this situation?*
**[10:36] Girl**
*Which of us is weirder?
The one atop the mailbox,*
**[10:38] ---**
*or the one atop his little sister?*
**[10:40] Girl**
*I think she has the upper hand.*
**[10:44] Girl**
*I can understand why she's
calling me a devil boy.*
**[10:47] Girl**
My name is Kagenui Yodzuru.
**[10:50] Girl**
Do you know me?
***SIGN*** Gaze
**[10:57] Girl**
My name is Araragi Koyomi.
**[10:59] Girl**
I'm Araragi Karen.
**[11:04] Yozuru**
A devilish brother and a hornet sister.
**[11:07] Yozuru**
Interesting.
***SIGN*** Black scene
**[11:10] Koyomi**
Did she just say "hornet"?
**[11:14] Yozuru**
Looks like that's over, so it doesn't matter.
**[11:19] Yozuru**
So, well?
**[11:21] ---**
I'll repeat my question.
**[11:23] ---**
Do you know where Eikou Cram School is?
**[11:27] Koyomi**
Let's see...
**[11:29] ---**
Hold on a second.
**[11:31] Koyomi**
A friend of mine
**[11:32] ---**
has the rather terrifying talent
of having memorized
**[11:34] ---**
locations for every cram school in Japan.
**[11:37] Koyomi**
*Okay, I'll do it...*
**[11:38] Koyomi**
*I'll call Hanekawa-san!*
**[11:39] Koyomi**
*Yay!*
***SIGN*** Hanekawa Tsubasa
**[11:42] Hanekawa**
Here I am.
**[11:44] Hanekawa**
This is Hanekawa.
**[11:46] Hanekawa**
Araragi-kun, are you studying?
**[11:49] Hanekawa**
Are you slacking off?
**[11:52] Hanekawa**
That's good to hear.
**[11:54] Hanekawa**
Me? Yeah, it's fine.
**[11:56] Hanekawa**
I was just doing some afternoon studying.
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[12:00] Hanekawa**
Eikou Cram School?
**[12:02] Hanekawa**
Yeah, I know it.
***SIGN*** She really knew it.
**[12:04] Koyomi**
You know everything.
**[12:06] Hanekawa**
I don't know everything.
**[12:08] Hanekawa**
I just know what I know.
**[12:09] Hanekawa**
Anyway, you should know
Eikou Cram School yourself.
**[12:15] ---**
Because it's...
**[12:17] Hanekawa**
It's the abandoned building where
Oshino-san and Shinobu-chan lived.
**[12:21] Hanekawa**
The cram school in that building
was Eikou Cram School.
**[12:24] Koyomi**
**[12:25] Koyomi**
Eikou Cram School, huh?
**[12:26] Koyomi**
I didn't know it had such a
smart-sounding name.
**[12:31] Hanekawa**
It's nothing worth thanking me for...
**[12:34] Hanekawa**
Bye, Araragi-kun.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[12:36] Hanekawa**
Say hi to Kanbaru-san for me.
**[12:39] Hanekawa**
Bye-bye!
**[12:43] Koyomi**
*I didn't say anything about going
to see Kanbaru...*
**[12:47] Koyomi**
*I was just asking her about a cram school.*
**[12:49] Koyomi**
*How much of my private life does she know?*
**[12:51] Koyomi**
*That's too steep a price!*
**[12:53] Yozuru**
You figure it out?
**[12:54] Yozuru**
Devil boy.
**[12:56] Koyomi**
Yes, well...
***SIGN*** Explaining
**[13:00] Yozuru**
I see.
**[13:02] Yozuru**
So there's where it is.
**[13:03] Koyomi**
But Kagenui-san, it's gone out of business.
**[13:07] Koyomi**
Why are you going there?
**[13:12] Yozuru**
Nothing special, I suppose...
**[13:15] Yozuru**
First, to establish a base of operations.
**[13:20] Yozuru**
Goodbye then, devil boy.
**[13:26] Yozuru**
Oh, right...
**[13:27] Yozuru**
You might get asked the same sort of thing
**[13:30] ---**
by a girl about this high.
**[13:34] Yozuru**
Be as kind to her as you were to me.
**[13:49] Yozuru**
What?
**[13:50] Yozuru**
You've been really quiet, Karen-chan.
**[13:57] Yozuru**
What's wrong?
**[13:58] Yozuru**
Don't make me deal with a
strange human like that alone!
**[14:01] Karen**
Oh, sorry.
**[14:03] Karen**
I was just thinking she was really strong.
**[14:07] Karen**
So I was readying myself.
**[14:08] Koyomi**
Strong?
**[14:10] Koyomi**
Really?
**[14:11] Koyomi**
She didn't look it.
**[14:13] Koyomi**
Except for the way she acted and spoke,
**[14:15] Koyomi**
she seemed like just an ordinary pretty woman.
**[14:19] Karen**
Her center of gravity stayed constant,
**[14:22] ---**
the entire time she was chatting with you.
**[14:24] Karen**
She had the balance of a figure skater.
**[14:27] Koyomi**
But you also walk along the
tops of walls, right?
**[14:31] Koyomi**
And while handstanding.
**[14:33] Karen**
Yeah, that's true...
**[14:36] Karen**
But she's spent a lot of time training.
**[14:38] Karen**
Her fists were perfectly shaped
for punching people.
**[14:42] Koyomi**
W-Were they?
**[14:44] Karen**
Yeah. If she hit a car's bumper,
she could set off the airbags.
***SIGN*** Goodbye SRS
**[14:50] Karen**
She's probably as good as my teacher...
**[14:54] Karen**
I couldn't beat her myself.
**[14:56] Koyomi**
My, Karen-san...
**[14:58] Koyomi**
You're sounding pretty wimpy.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[14:59] Karen**
I can tell any difference in strength,
**[15:02] Karen**
so long as my opponent isn't evil.
**[15:04] Koyomi**
I see.
**[15:06] Karen**
But I don't know for sure that she isn't.
**[15:17] Koyomi**
*After that, I took Karen to
Kanbaru's front gate,*
**[15:21] ---**
*and introduced them to each other.*
**[15:25] Koyomi**
This is Kanbaru Suruga-san,
a second-year at Naoetsu High.
**[15:28] Koyomi**
She's a pervert, so be careful.
**[15:30] Koyomi**
This is Araragi Karen-san, a third-year
at Tsuganoki 2nd Middle School.
**[15:34] Koyomi**
She's an idiot, so be careful.
**[15:38] Koyomi**
Don't both blush at the same time...
**[15:40] Koyomi**
Those weren't compliments!
***SIGN*** Sister Brother
**[15:42] Koyomi**
*After seeing my sister to Kanbaru's,*
**[15:44] Koyomi**
*I started home without any handstanding
or riding on someone's shoulders,*
***SIGN*** Hachikuji Mayoi
5-3
**[15:48] ---**
*when I found Hachikuji.*
**[15:56] Koyomi**
*Jeez...*
**[15:58] Koyomi**
*I'm certain you all expect me to leap
on Hachikuji, in a burst of joy...*
**[16:03] Koyomi**
*You all expect me to grab a girl,*
**[16:07] ---**
*innocent as a newborn fawn, from behind*
**[16:10] ---**
*and start rubbing my face against her.*
**[16:14] Koyomi**
*No, I admit it.*
**[16:15] Koyomi**
*There was a time when I would have.*
**[16:17] Koyomi**
*There was.*
**[16:18] Koyomi**
*But I'm an adult now.*
**[16:20] Koyomi**
*I've no interest in the little girl
called Hachikuji Mayoi.*
**[16:25] Koyomi**
*But I suppose, given that
I have no interest in her,*
**[16:29] Koyomi**
*I've no particular reason to ignore her...*
**[16:33] Koyomi**
*If I ignore her, she may get the impudent*
**[16:37] ---**
*and brazen idea that I'm
deliberately ignoring her.*
**[16:40] Koyomi**
*In light of this, and only in
light of this, mind you,*
**[16:42] Koyomi**
*it may mean that the smartest option
would be to call out and greet her,*
**[16:46] ---**
*to prove how disinterested
I am in Hachikuji.*
**[16:51] Koyomi**
*Okay, then...*
**[16:51] Koyomi**
*With that conclusion reached,
it's time to get started.*
**[16:55] Koyomi**
*I'm not hesitant in the least.*
**[16:57] Koyomi**
*I have to go home and study,
or Hanekawa will get mad at me.*
**[17:01] Koyomi**
*But I'll spare a single minute for Hachikuji.*
**[17:06] Koyomi**
*Now...*
**[17:07] Koyomi**
*Now it's time to grab her
as hard as I can...*
**[17:10] Koyomi**
*To rub my cheek against her...*
**[17:11] Koyomi**
*To touch and rub her...*
**[17:12] Koyomi**
*To love her as much as I can...*
**[17:13] Koyomi**
*Today, I shall embrace Hachikuji!*
**[17:18] Koyomi**
*Hachikuji!*
**[17:29] Hachikuji**
Araragi-san!
**[17:34] Koyomi**
Shinobu, was that you?!
**[17:36] Koyomi**
Damn! Damn you, damn you, damn you!
**[17:38] Koyomi**
What were you doing? What?!
**[17:39] Koyomi**
You screwed it up!
**[17:40] Koyomi**
You screwed up the biggest event of my life!
**[17:42] Koyomi**
No more blood for you,
you golden-eyed blondie...
**[17:45] Koyomi**
I should've abandoned you!
**[17:47] Hachikuji**
U-Um...
**[17:48] Hachikuji**
Um, Kikirara-san?
**[17:51] Koyomi**
Hachikuji,
**[17:52] Koyomi**
don't confuse my name with that of
the little twin sisters of fancy goods.
**[17:55] Koyomi**
My name is Araragi.
**[17:57] Koyomi**
And when I flew past you,
**[18:01] Koyomi**
you got it right.
**[18:03] Hachikuji**
Sorry. I bit my tongue.
**[18:05] Koyomi**
No, you did it deliberately.
**[18:07] Karen**
I smiled!
**[18:09] Koyomi**
Too cute!
**[18:13] Karen**
You're as bad at ad-libbing as ever...
***SIGN*** No Cars
***SIGN*** Off-Limits
Detour
**[18:19] Karen**
Anyway, Araragi-san, you must
have lots of free time
**[18:21] ---**
on your hands to be wandering
the city at this hour.
**[18:25] Karen**
Have you given up on studying?
**[18:27] Karen**
Wandering?
**[18:28] Hachikuji**
Have you given up on pretending to study
to make Hanekawa-san like you?
**[18:32] Koyomi**
That's really mean!
***SIGN*** Failure as a Person
**[18:35] Hachikuji**
Well, she's not the type
you could fool forever.
**[18:40] ---**
Let me guess.
**[18:41] ---**
She realized you were pretending to study
so you could see her in her camisole.
**[18:45] ---**
Since half your motivation
comes from her boobs.
**[18:50] Koyomi**
What kind of person do you see me as?
**[18:52] Hachikuji**
The rest of it is from my hot, curvy body!
**[18:56] Koyomi**
Where is your body hot and curvy?
**[19:00] Koyomi**
Your body's more barrel-shaped...
**[19:02] ---**
You could make some delicious
beef stew out of it.
***SIGN*** Failure as a Person
**[19:06] Koyomi**
I do like you, but I don't like flat lolis.
***SIGN*** Danger
**[19:11] Koyomi**
I only talk to you because you have
big boobs, for an elementary schooler.
**[19:16] Koyomi**
I'm taking a chance on the future of your
**[19:19] ---**
presently underwhelming bust.
***SIGN*** Failure as a Person
**[19:22] Hachikuji**
No human being would ever say that.
**[19:24] Koyomi**
But anyway, Hachikuji...
**[19:27] Koyomi**
I'm dating Senjougahara,
and I love Hanekawa.
**[19:31] Koyomi**
But I plan to marry you.
**[19:36] Hachikuji**
Please don't be the first person
to propose to me!
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[19:41] Hachikuji**
Actually, don't propose to
elementary schoolers.
**[19:43] Koyomi**
*Hmm... No luck, huh?*
**[19:46] Koyomi**
*How can I get the overwhelming passion*
**[19:48] ---**
*in my chest to reach Hachikuji's heart?*
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[19:51] Koyomi**
*Touch it directly, maybe?*
**[19:55] Koyomi**
*Will fondling them make her understand?*
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[19:57] Hachikuji**
Oh, my.
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[19:58] Hachikuji**
I sense the presence of something bad.
**[20:00] Koyomi**
Be careful, Hachikuji.
**[20:02] Koyomi**
I'm always after your breasts.
**[20:04] Koyomi**
Given the slightest opportunity, I'd drop
whatever I'm doing, to touch them.
***SIGN*** Karabuki
**[20:07] Koyomi**
By the way, Karabuki-san.
**[20:09] Koyomi**
It's true that I plan to clean
Kanbaru's room tomorrow,
**[20:12] Koyomi**
but that doesn't make me a cleaning
maniac who loves to clean.
**[20:16] Koyomi**
Don't call me by a name that sounds like
I clean with a dried karabuki cloth...
**[20:19] Koyomi**
My name is Araragi!
**[20:20] Hachikuji**
Sorry. I bit my tongue.
**[20:22] Koyomi**
No, you did it deliberately.
***SIGN*** Failure as a Person
**[20:25] Hachikuji**
I bit you.
**[20:27] Hachikuji**
A love-bite?!
**[20:29] Hachikuji**
*Yes!*
**[20:30] Hachikuji**
*This time, I ad-libbed a response...*
**[20:31] Hachikuji**
*I can do it!*
**[20:34] Yotsugi**
Hey, devil boy.
***SIGN*** No entry.
**[20:36] Yotsugi**
If you know, please tell me
**[20:38] Yotsugi**
which way I want to go...
**[20:40] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
***SIGN*** No Entry
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[20:46] Yotsugi**
I'm told there's a cram school
**[20:48] ---**
that went out of business
called Eikou Cram School.
**[20:52] Yotsugi**
Do you know where it is, devil boy?
**[20:58] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
**[21:02] Yotsugi**
My name is Ononoki Yotsugi.
**[21:06] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
**[21:09] Koyomi**
*That's a stupid phrase.*
**[21:11] Koyomi**
*And where the hell is your posed look?*
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[21:14] Koyomi**
I see. I'm Araragi Koyomi.
**[21:17] Yotsugi**
Hello, devil boy.
**[21:19] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
**[21:21] Koyomi**
Hi...
**[21:23] Koyomi**
Um, Eikou Cram School is...
***SIGN*** Construction Sorry for the Trouble
***SIGN*** Turn Right
**[21:29] Koyomi**
All right. Thank you.
**[21:31] Koyomi**
You were a big help, devil boy.
**[21:33] Koyomi**
And snail girl.
**[21:35] Koyomi**
I said, with a posed look.
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[21:52] Koyomi**
Huh?
***SIGN*** Danger Zone
**[21:53] Koyomi**
Did she just call you "snail girl"?
**[21:59] Hachikuji**
Yeah, she did.
**[22:00] ---**
*Huh?*
**[22:01] Koyomi**
*Isn't that strange?*
**[22:03] Koyomi**
*Come to think of it, Kagenui-san...*
**[22:05] Koyomi**
*Kagenui Yodzuru...*
**[22:06] Koyomi**
*She didn't just call me a devil boy.*
**[22:09] Koyomi**
*She said something about Karen.*
**[22:13] Yozuru**
*A devilish brother and a hornet sister.*
**[22:17] Yozuru**
*Interesting.*
***SIGN*** Devil Devil Boy
**[22:18] Yozuru**
*Devil...*
**[22:22] Yozuru**
*Devils who suck blood...*
***SIGN*** Vampires
**[22:25] Yozuru**
*Vampires.*
**[22:27] Hachikuji**
Anyway, Araragi-san, from what I saw,
she looked pretty capable.
**[22:32] Hachikuji**
You'd have to be as good as my
master to be a match for her.
***SIGN*** White Scene To be continued
**[22:36] Koyomi**
You don't have a master.
# E10 - Tsukihi Phoenix, Part Three
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GY5VJKP3Y/tsukihi-phoenix-part-3)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[00:04] Shinobu**
Master,
**[00:05] Shinobu**
I have something important to discuss with you.
**[00:08] Shinobu**
Well?
**[00:09] Shinobu**
Do you have a moment to talk?
**[00:11] Koyomi**
It can't be later?
**[00:13] Koyomi**
Can't it wait until I'm done studying?
**[00:15] Shinobu**
It's actually a rather serious situation,
**[00:18] Shinobu**
one requiring drastic action.
**[00:20] Koyomi**
What is it?
**[00:23] Koyomi**
Very well...
**[00:24] Koyomi**
I'll listen.
**[00:26] Shinobu**
Master,
**[00:28] Shinobu**
according to secret information I've acquired,
**[00:32] Shinobu**
Mister Donuts is having
***SIGN*** 100-Yen Donut Sale
**[00:35] ---**
a sale where any donut costs 100 yen!
**[00:39] Shinobu**
If we don't leave immediately, they'll sell out...
**[00:43] Koyomi**
Fine, fine.
**[00:45] Koyomi**
I'll go to buy you some before dinner,
**[00:46] ---**
so I can get out of the house.
**[00:48] Koyomi**
You like golden chocolate, right?
**[00:50] Shinobu**
No.
**[00:51] Shinobu**
Take me there.
**[00:53] Shinobu**
I want to choose for myself!
**[00:56] Koyomi**
It's really sunny out.
**[00:57] Koyomi**
Will you be okay?
**[00:59] Shinobu**
I'll just get a nasty sunburn.
**[01:01] Shinobu**
I'm not really a normal vampire anymore.
**[01:05] Shinobu**
I won't even need sunscreen,
**[01:07] Shinobu**
just a hat should suffice.
**[01:10] Koyomi**
No, I'll let you know when we're at the store.
**[01:13] Koyomi**
Until then, stay in my shadow.
**[01:15] Koyomi**
You'd prefer to minimize your
time in the sun, right?
**[01:19] Shinobu**
Yes. The sun is my enemy.
**[01:22] Koyomi**
It'll only take thirty minutes or so.
**[01:23] Koyomi**
Be sure you stay awake.
**[01:25] Shinobu**
See you soon, then.
**[01:26] Shinobu**
Bye.
***SIGN*** Episode 10: Tsukihi Phoenix, Part 3
**[03:11] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan?
**[03:12] Tsukihi**
Heading out again?
**[03:13] Koyomi**
Yeah... I am.
**[03:16] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan, will Karen-chan be
home late again today?
**[03:19] Koyomi**
I dunno.
**[03:21] Tsukihi**
I see.
**[03:22] Tsukihi**
Well, when she's really into something,
**[03:24] ---**
she stops paying attention
to her surroundings.
**[03:27] Koyomi**
Why? Did you have something
to discuss with her?
**[03:30] Koyomi**
Aren't you done with your Fire Sisters stuff?
**[03:35] Tsukihi**
Yeah, it's really nothing...
**[03:39] Tsukihi**
But you know, well,
**[03:40] Tsukihi**
I haven't been spending much
time with her lately.
**[03:45] Tsukihi**
I'm sure you've already figured this out,
**[03:48] Tsukihi**
but I'm not as into justice as she is.
**[03:55] Tsukihi**
I like justice, and I love justice,
**[03:58] Tsukihi**
but I don't really have any clear
image of it inside me.
**[04:02] Tsukihi**
You know how Karen-chan says,
**[04:03] ---**
"My blood of justice won't forgive you!"
and stuff like that?
**[04:05] Tsukihi**
And "My blood of justice burns"? Like that?
**[04:07] Koyomi**
She does.
**[04:09] Tsukihi**
But I've never felt that way before.
**[04:12] Tsukihi**
She has it within her, and I don't.
**[04:18] Tsukihi**
The justice I have faith in
**[04:21] Tsukihi**
is her brand and yours.
**[04:25] Tsukihi**
If she wasn't so sure about it,
**[04:29] ---**
I wouldn't believe in something as vague as justice.
**[04:33] Tsukihi**
In that sense, you're right.
**[04:36] Tsukihi**
My justice is fake.
**[04:38] Tsukihi**
The reason I talk about it is because
**[04:40] ---**
I'm too easily influenced by
the people around me.
**[04:43] Tsukihi**
If Karen-chan does what she
does for other people,
**[04:46] Tsukihi**
I do it because of them.
**[04:50] Tsukihi**
We two have always been
different in that way.
**[04:53] Tsukihi**
So, Onii-chan...
**[04:55] Tsukihi**
Lately, I've begun thinking it's time
to put the Fire Sisters to bed.
**[05:01] Koyomi**
Sounds good to me.
**[05:03] Koyomi**
Actually, I think you two have
gotten along too well up to this point.
**[05:09] Tsukihi**
I know it isn't anything that can be helped...
**[05:12] Tsukihi**
Once she reaches high school,
**[05:14] Tsukihi**
will she bully me like you do?
**[05:17] Koyomi**
Don't talk about me like that!
**[05:20] Koyomi**
I consider myself a helpful,
and reliable, older brother.
**[05:25] Tsukihi**
Helpful?
**[05:27] Tsukihi**
You mean like brushing our teeth,
while touching our breasts?
**[05:31] Tsukihi**
Okay, I've decided.
**[05:33] Tsukihi**
Once Karen-chan returns,
**[05:34] ---**
we'll discuss the future of the Fire Sisters!
**[05:38] Koyomi**
What? So you might split up?
**[05:41] Tsukihi**
It is possible...
**[05:42] Tsukihi**
We have creative differences!
**[05:44] Tsukihi**
If she wants to go at it alone, I won't stop her.
**[05:48] Tsukihi**
I shall swallow my tears, watching her go!
**[05:50] Tsukihi**
Come to our farewell party, okay?
**[05:52] Tsukihi**
I'll invite lots of middle-school girls and stuff.
**[05:55] Koyomi**
Fine... I'll make the time to go.
**[05:59] Tsukihi**
So, my helpful brother,
**[06:01] Tsukihi**
weren't you going to leave?
**[06:03] Koyomi**
Oh, that's right...
**[06:06] Koyomi**
Watch the house, okay?
**[06:08] Koyomi**
I'll be home soon.
**[06:10] Koyomi**
Need me to pick up anything?
**[06:12] Tsukihi**
Nope. See you.
**[06:14] Koyomi**
See me...
**[06:16] Koyomi**
And get back to your room.
**[06:19] Koyomi**
I can't open the door with
you here, dressed like that
**[06:24] Koyomi**
Stop wandering around partially clothed,
is what I'm saying.
**[06:28] Koyomi**
Don't dress like that.
**[06:31] Koyomi**
Hey, Tsukihi-chan...
**[06:33] Koyomi**
I'm gonna take that off.
**[06:34] Tsukihi**
Wh-What?
**[06:35] Tsukihi**
Stop it, Onii-chan...
**[06:36] Tsukihi**
What are you doing?
**[06:38] Tsukihi**
No!
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[06:45] Koyomi**
I knew it.
**[06:46] Tsukihi**
What? What? What?
**[06:47] Tsukihi**
What's going on?
**[06:49] Tsukihi**
Why is my brother stripping off my clothes,
**[06:51] ---**
grabbing my hands, and pushing me down?
**[06:53] Koyomi**
Um, Tsukihi-chan...
**[06:55] Koyomi**
Didn't you have a scar here?
**[06:58] Koyomi**
*The scar that should have
been there is gone.*
**[07:00] Koyomi**
*The doctors were certain that*
**[07:02] ---**
*the scar would never, ever fade, but...*
**[07:05] Koyomi**
Wait. There aren't any
scars on your body...
**[07:10] Tsukihi**
Scars heal. I'm a human being!
**[07:14] Koyomi**
Yeah, I guess so.
**[07:15] Tsukihi**
And just get off me, Onii-chan.
**[07:18] Tsukihi**
If you wanted to see if the scar was there,
**[07:20] ---**
you didn't have to grab my hands
and get on top of me.
**[07:24] Koyomi**
That's... That's true.
**[07:29] Tsukihi**
Why did you grab my breast,
before getting off me?
**[07:32] Koyomi**
Just because.
**[07:33] Koyomi**
It was right in front of me,
so I wondered how it would feel.
**[07:36] Tsukihi**
That's the only reason?!
**[07:37] Koyomi**
Yeah, see...
**[07:39] Koyomi**
Squish squish squish squish.
**[07:41] Tsukihi**
Don't touch me with your feet!
**[07:42] Tsukihi**
It isn't making any fun
sound effects like that!
**[07:44] Tsukihi**
Jeez, Onii-chan, you're touching your
little sisters' body way too much!
**[07:47] Koyomi**
Um, if someone only heard that line,
**[07:49] ---**
they'd get some really
strange ideas about me.
**[07:51] Tsukihi**
Jeez...
**[07:52] Tsukihi**
Jeez, jeez, jeez!
**[07:55] Tsukihi**
Why is it that sisters have pure
relationships with their boyfriends,
**[07:59] Tsukihi**
but are still required to have a physical relationship with their brother?
**[08:02] Koyomi**
Oh...
**[08:03] Koyomi**
What was his name?
**[08:05] Koyomi**
Your boyfriend.
**[08:06] Koyomi**
Rosokuzawa-kun?
**[08:07] Koyomi**
You haven't split up yet?
**[08:09] Tsukihi**
Sorry, but I'm in love.
**[08:11] Tsukihi**
Karen-chan's boyfriend, Mizudori-kun,
**[08:13] ---**
hasn't been getting along
with her as well lately.
**[08:16] Tsukihi**
But I think they're all right, too.
**[08:20] Koyomi**
Okay, I'm leaving now.
**[08:22] Tsukihi**
Don't bother coming home!
**[08:24] Tsukihi**
There's no home for you!
**[08:26] Koyomi**
No, I'm coming back...
**[08:29] Koyomi**
Inside your heart!
**[08:31] Shinobu**
Flocky chou?
**[08:33] Shinobu**
What is this? Is such a thing possible?
**[08:35] Shinobu**
To combine the pon de ring
and the French cruller...
**[08:39] Shinobu**
Incredible!
**[08:41] Shinobu**
Old-fashioned!
**[08:43] Shinobu**
Just looking at it reveals how
delicious it must be.
**[08:45] Shinobu**
I can tell! I don't even have to eat it.
**[08:48] Shinobu**
I will, though!
**[08:49] Shinobu**
And the mere name "tofu donut" entices me...
**[08:54] Shinobu**
And look at these muffins,
lined up like jewels...
**[08:58] Shinobu**
Why was the existence of
these muffins hidden from me?
**[09:02] Shinobu**
Curse them! Unforgivable.
**[09:05] Shinobu**
However, and there's no need
to even say this,
**[09:08] ---**
the best part is having all the wonderful
**[09:11] ---**
donuts I've consumed so far,
**[09:13] ---**
including the golden chocolate,
laid out before me, in such numbers!
**[09:17] Shinobu**
Incredible!
**[09:18] Shinobu**
Master, can I eat them all?
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[09:21] Koyomi**
Of course not!
**[09:24] Shinobu**
Then what?!
**[09:25] ---**
I will be forced to select a few for my meal,
**[09:28] ---**
from the dozens upon dozens set out here?
**[09:32] Koyomi**
I'll bring you once a month or something.
**[09:34] Koyomi**
So you can wait.
**[09:36] Koyomi**
Hmm,
**[09:37] Koyomi**
I suppose you can pick three to start.
**[09:41] Shinobu**
Oh, my master...
**[09:43] Shinobu**
Don't be so foolish.
**[09:46] Shinobu**
If you're thinking about the future,
**[09:48] ---**
then why not consider this an investment
**[09:51] ---**
for getting on my good side?
**[09:54] Koyomi**
What happens if I get on your good side?
**[10:05] Koyomi**
Oh, fine... Yeah, yeah.
**[10:07] Koyomi**
Let's do this...
**[10:08] Koyomi**
Let's each choose five.
**[10:10] Koyomi**
Ten total.
**[10:11] Koyomi**
And we can share.
**[10:13] Koyomi**
But no muffins and no pies.
**[10:15] Koyomi**
They aren't part of the 100-yen sale.
**[10:19] Shinobu**
Very well.
**[10:21] Shinobu**
I accept.
**[10:37] Koyomi**
So, Shinobu...
**[10:38] Koyomi**
I wanted to ask you something.
**[10:40] Koyomi**
On my way to Kanbaru's place,
and when I was coming back,
**[10:44] Koyomi**
those two girls who asked me for directions...
**[10:46] Koyomi**
The older, with the Kyoto accent,
and the younger of the "posed look."
**[10:49] Koyomi**
What did you think of them?
**[10:54] Shinobu**
I suppose I could tell you
about the posed look one.
**[10:59] Koyomi**
What do you mean?
**[11:00] Shinobu**
She wasn't human.
**[11:02] Shinobu**
She was a supernatural creature.
**[11:03] Shinobu**
She took on human form,
**[11:06] Shinobu**
but like me, she isn't the age she appears.
**[11:09] Shinobu**
And Ononoki Yotsugi is, of course, an alias.
***SIGN*** Ononoki Yotsugi
**[11:13] Koyomi**
I was wondering about her
first name, Yotsugi.
***SIGN*** Kagenui Yodzuru
**[11:17] Koyomi**
Her first name sounds
just like that Kagenui girl.
**[11:21] Shinobu**
She's probably using the name to bind her!
**[11:25] Shinobu**
Just like I'm bound by that brat
in the Hawaiian shirt.
***SIGN*** Oshino Meme
***SIGN*** Oshino Shinobu
**[11:30] Shinobu**
Basically, Ononoki Yotsugi is
Kagenui Yodzuru's familiar.
**[11:34] Koyomi**
Familiar?
**[11:36] Shinobu**
That's what you'd call it in your culture.
**[11:39] Shinobu**
A shikigami, perhaps?
**[11:43] Koyomi**
So, of the two,
**[11:44] Koyomi**
Kagenui is one of those specialists...
**[11:48] Shinobu**
I'm not going to share information
about a respectable person.
**[11:52] Shinobu**
I don't really want you to use me as a tool.
**[11:58] Shinobu**
You won't be able to get me to talk
**[12:00] Shinobu**
just by buying me donuts.
**[12:02] Shinobu**
I'm not that cheap a woman.
**[12:04] Shinobu**
I'm not your servant or your shikigami.
**[12:08] Shinobu**
If you really insist on knowing,
**[12:11] ---**
why not ask the man sitting
in the seat over there?
**[12:26] Koyomi**
Kaiki-san,
**[12:27] Koyomi**
after all that grandstanding when you left,
**[12:31] Koyomi**
why are you here, eating donuts?
**[12:33] Kaiki**
Some minor business.
**[12:35] Kaiki**
Just unpleasant, minor business.
**[12:38] Kaiki**
Araragi, it's nothing for you
to concern yourself over.
**[12:41] Kaiki**
I'll be gone shortly.
**[12:43] Koyomi**
I'd prefer if you left now.
**[12:46] Kaiki**
Don't be in such a hurry.
**[12:48] Kaiki**
I didn't ever want to see you again, either.
**[12:52] Kaiki**
Because of you, I lost a lot of money.
**[12:57] Koyomi**
You do know Kagenui Yodzuru
and Ononoki Yotsugi, right?
**[13:00] Kaiki**
You want to know about them? I'll tell you.
**[13:02] Kaiki**
Pay up.
**[13:04] Koyomi**
Fine...
**[13:06] Koyomi**
How much do I need to pay,
for you to tell me?
**[13:09] Karen**
Let me see.
**[13:11] Karen**
That will do.
**[13:13] Karen**
Araragi.
**[13:14] Karen**
I'll allow you to pay with this
meager change, as a gift
**[13:18] ---**
to honor your relationship
with Senjougahara.
**[13:21] Koyomi**
Tell me...
**[13:23] Koyomi**
Kagenui Yodzuru and Ononoki Yotsugi!
**[13:25] Karen**
They are specialists...
**[13:27] Karen**
Ghost busters like me.
**[13:29] Karen**
Of course, while I'm a fake, they're real.
**[13:34] Karen**
I'm a con man, and they are onmyouji.
**[13:37] Koyomi**
Onmyouji?
**[13:42] Karen**
Naturally, I said "they."
**[13:45] Karen**
But to be precise, Kagenui is the onmyouji,
**[13:47] ---**
and Ononoki is her shikigami.
**[13:51] Koyomi**
You know them?
**[13:52] Karen**
Why would you think so?
**[13:53] Koyomi**
Well, the way you talked.
**[13:56] Koyomi**
Just the way you spoke implied it.
**[13:59] Karen**
I merely know their names.
**[14:01] Karen**
Kagenui is rather famous in the business.
**[14:06] Karen**
Kagenui Yodzuru and Ononoki Yotsugi,
**[14:08] Karen**
modern-day onmyouji.
**[14:11] Karen**
Hey, Araragi,
**[14:13] Karen**
they're specialists, but they
specialize in a very limited field.
**[14:17] Karen**
That two-person cell specializes
**[14:19] Karen**
in immortal creatures.
**[14:26] Koyomi**
An onmyouji specializing
in immortal monsters?
**[14:29] Koyomi**
Jeez...
**[14:30] Koyomi**
Then they're probably after you and me.
**[14:34] Shinobu**
You think we're their targets?
**[14:37] Shinobu**
But perhaps we are not, my master.
**[14:40] Shinobu**
I've eaten many immortal creatures.
**[14:43] Shinobu**
I kill the immortal, too.
**[14:45] Shinobu**
Timed Light
1
**[14:46] Shinobu**
Timed Light
**[14:46] Shinobu**
And the supernatural isn't immortal.
**[14:47] Shinobu**
Timed Light
3
**[14:48] Shinobu**
It isn't even alive.
**[14:51] Koyomi**
Yeah...
**[14:52] Koyomi**
Well, I guess if you're not living, you can't die.
**[14:55] Koyomi**
So I guess anything supernatural is immortal.
**[14:59] Koyomi**
But strict definitions aside,
**[15:02] Koyomi**
when you say that they might
not be after us, Shinobu,
**[15:05] ---**
does that mean there are
vampires in this city besides us?
**[15:12] Shinobu**
It doesn't have to be vampires.
**[15:15] Shinobu**
It wouldn't be strange.
**[15:17] Shinobu**
No.
**[15:18] Shinobu**
I suppose it would.
**[15:20] Koyomi**
*Come to think of it,*
**[15:22] Koyomi**
*even just among those I know,*
**[15:24] ---**
*many people have supernatural
creatures inside them.*
**[15:29] Koyomi**
*Like Kanbaru Suruga, with a
monkey in her left hand.*
**[15:32] Koyomi**
*Or Hanekawa Tsubasa,
with a cat inside her mind.*
**[15:38] Koyomi**
*So it wouldn't be particularly odd
if there were others*
**[15:41] ---**
*housing creatures that I don't know about.*
**[15:45] Koyomi**
*Kagenui-san and Ononoki-chan.*
**[15:47] Koyomi**
*If they're setting up base in the same
abandoned building as Oshino,*
***SIGN*** Homeless
**[15:51] Koyomi**
*they're likely in the same business.
I should deal with them quickly.*
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[16:08] Yozuru**
You...
**[16:11] Koyomi**
Hi.
**[16:13] Yozuru**
First, I should thank you.
**[16:15] Yozuru**
I followed the directions you gave me,
**[16:18] ---**
and it led me to the Eikou Cram School.
**[16:20] Yozuru**
And you told Yotsugi, as well.
**[16:23] Koyomi**
Um, I'm sorry...
**[16:25] Koyomi**
I'd like to make something clear.
**[16:29] Koyomi**
You came to this city to exterminate us, right?
**[16:35] Koyomi**
You've come to kill her, an immortal
creature not of this world,
**[16:38] ---**
along with me, her servant, yes?
**[16:42] Koyomi**
Both of you asking me for
directions was no coincidence.
**[16:45] Koyomi**
You were investigating me.
**[16:50] Koyomi**
Devil boy,
**[16:52] Koyomi**
you seem to be under a misapprehension.
**[16:58] Koyomi**
Matters pertaining to the iron-blooded,
cold-blooded, hot-blooded
**[17:03] Koyomi**
killer of monsters and lord of the night,
**[17:05] Koyomi**
Kiss-shot Acerola-orion Heart-under-blade,
**[17:09] Koyomi**
have already been resolved.
**[17:12] Koyomi**
And our industry hardly has the free time
**[17:14] ---**
to squander resources on a normal human
**[17:17] ---**
with a few lingering aftereffects.
**[17:21] Koyomi**
Of course, that's thanks to
Oshino-kun's habitual interference and meddling.
**[17:28] Koyomi**
*Oshino-kun?*
**[17:30] Koyomi**
*Did she just say Oshino-kun?*
***SIGN*** Yellow Scene
**[17:31] Koyomi**
Hey, master. Focus.
**[17:35] Koyomi**
You have other things to think about now.
**[17:43] Koyomi**
*That's right. That's right...*
**[17:45] Koyomi**
*If they aren't here for Oshino Shinobu
and Araragi Koyomi,*
**[17:49] Koyomi**
*then why have Kagenui-san and
Ononoki-chan come?*
**[17:53] Tsukihi**
Shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up!
**[17:57] Tsukihi**
How long will you stand there,
pressing the doorbell?
**[17:59] Tsukihi**
Can't you tell I'm pretending
not to be here?!
**[18:01] Yotsugi**
*Unlimited Rulebook.*
**[18:04] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[18:41] Yozuru**
Calm down, devil boy.
**[18:44] Yozuru**
Don't get so worked up.
**[18:46] Yozuru**
Oshino-kun would probably
say something like,
**[18:50] ---**
"You're looking lively.
Did something good happen?"
**[18:54] Koyomi**
Shut up!
**[18:55] Koyomi**
You...
**[18:56] Koyomi**
You bastards...
**[18:57] Koyomi**
You killed my sister...
**[18:59] Koyomi**
My sister Tsukihi-chan...
**[19:01] Koyomi**
I'll make you pay!
**[19:03] Yozuru**
What, that was your sister?
**[19:06] Yozuru**
I see.
**[19:07] Yozuru**
Right, your name is Araragi, too.
**[19:10] Yozuru**
I thought it was just a coincidence.
**[19:12] Yozuru**
I understand.
**[19:14] Yozuru**
Our information had some gaps.
**[19:16] Yozuru**
Then that must have been a shock for you.
**[19:20] Yozuru**
Sorry, sorry.
**[19:22] Koyomi**
You think an apology will help?
**[19:24] Yozuru**
Observe.
**[19:35] Yozuru**
Devil boy,
**[19:37] Yozuru**
you appear to have a thing
for immortal creatures.
**[19:41] Yozuru**
Your sister is possessed by an immortal bird.
**[19:44] Yozuru**
That was never truly your sister.
**[19:47] ---**
It is human, yet not human.
**[19:50] Yozuru**
What you see there is the rare firebird,
**[19:53] Yozuru**
the evil phoenix.
**[19:55] Yozuru**
I said, with a posed look.
**[19:58] Shinobu**
Enough.
**[19:59] Shinobu**
I will not allow any more of this.
**[20:01] Shinobu**
You can't wish
**[20:03] ---**
to attract more attention than
you already have, correct?
**[20:08] Yozuru**
We don't care.
**[20:10] Yozuru**
We're not clever enough to be
concerned with time or place...
**[20:14] Yozuru**
And how will you stop us?
**[20:16] Yozuru**
What can you do?
**[20:18] Yozuru**
Vampire...
**[20:20] Yozuru**
Former vampire.
**[20:22] Yozuru**
Without your skills, you're no threat to me.
**[20:26] Shinobu**
Possibly!
**[20:29] Shinobu**
But whether that's true for you,
is it true for the girl?
**[20:32] Shinobu**
I doubt she's strong enough
**[20:35] Shinobu**
to withstand my energy drain.
**[20:38] Shinobu**
And if I drain her dry,
**[20:41] Shinobu**
I think I could handle you...
**[20:45] Koyomi**
*A bluff!*
**[20:46] Shinobu**
I'm not going to interfere with you.
**[20:50] Shinobu**
But I shall request that you
withdraw for now.
**[20:53] Shinobu**
You could do that for me, couldn't you?
**[20:56] Shinobu**
Time isn't an important factor for you.
**[21:01] Yozuru**
Fine, then.
**[21:02] Yozuru**
As you say, we'll leave now.
**[21:04] Yozuru**
Let's go.
**[21:05] Yozuru**
Despite what I said,
**[21:06] ---**
we have no interest in killing
**[21:10] ---**
a sister in front of her brother.
**[21:14] Yozuru**
Naturally.
**[21:16] Yozuru**
She isn't your real sister.
**[21:18] Koyomi**
*Not my real sister...*
**[21:21] Koyomi**
*A fake sister?*
**[21:24] Koyomi**
I'm sure the devil boy
**[21:25] ---**
needs time to get this straight in his head.
**[21:28] Koyomi**
We'll give you time, out of respect for the legendary vampire.
**[21:33] Koyomi**
We'll pretend to fall for your bluff,
**[21:36] Koyomi**
so prepare yourself in any way you like.
**[21:42] Koyomi**
We'll return tomorrow.
**[21:43] Koyomi**
Be sure everything has been handled by then.
**[21:46] Koyomi**
Running won't help.
**[21:48] Koyomi**
To be clear, neither of us is as easy
to deal with as Oshino-kun.
**[21:51] Koyomi**
We won't let any prey escape.
**[21:54] Koyomi**
And if you try to stop us,
**[21:55] Koyomi**
we'll ignore the ruling that
decided you were harmless,
**[21:57] Koyomi**
and we'll eliminate you, too.
**[22:00] Koyomi**
Goodbye.
**[22:01] Koyomi**
Why...
**[22:02] Koyomi**
Why are you after Tsukihi-chan?
**[22:06] Koyomi**
There's no reason for you to...
**[22:09] Yozuru**
There is.
**[22:10] Yozuru**
She's a supernatural creature...
**[22:13] Yozuru**
A monstrous fake that snuck
into a human family,
**[22:16] Yozuru**
pretended to be human,
**[22:18] Yozuru**
and deceived humans!
**[22:20] Yozuru**
We call that evil.
**[22:26] Yozuru**
We're the good guys...
**[22:29] Yozuru**
So we cannot ignore a con like that.
**[22:33] Yozuru**
We can't allow it.
# E11 - Tsukihi Phoenix, Part Four
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRGGV45DR/tsukihi-phoenix-part-4)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Suruga**
The Dying Bird...
**[00:03] Suruga**
A type of supernatural cuckoo.
**[00:06] Suruga**
The cuckoo from the poem:
**[00:08] ---**
"I see green leaves and hear
the mountain cuckoo's cry,
**[00:10] ---**
as I eat the first tuna of the year."
**[00:12] Suruga**
They lied when they said it was a phoenix.
**[00:16] Suruga**
This bird habitually plants its
eggs in other birds' nests.
**[00:20] Suruga**
It waits for the mother bird of
another species to leave,
**[00:24] Suruga**
and then pushes those eggs out
of the nest, onto the ground.
**[00:27] Suruga**
Then it lays its own eggs,
**[00:31] ---**
for the mother bird to warm and hatch.
**[00:36] Suruga**
The supernatural cuckoo,
**[00:38] ---**
the Dying Bird, exhibits the same behavior.
**[00:42] Suruga**
It does the same thing.
**[00:44] Suruga**
It plants its egg in a human nest.
**[00:47] Suruga**
Inside the womb of a pregnant mother,
**[00:50] ---**
it reincarnates itself like a phoenix,
the immortal bird.
**[00:54] Suruga**
The common legend of the phoenix
**[00:57] ---**
describes the bird, at its life's end,
**[01:00] Suruga**
throwing itself into the flames,
**[01:06] ---**
so it can be reborn.
**[01:09] Suruga**
In this case, the flame is a human mother.
**[01:13] Suruga**
To be precise, the Dying Bird's victim
**[01:17] ---**
is not your sister,
**[01:19] ---**
but is, instead, your mother.
**[01:22] Suruga**
Over ten years ago,
**[01:25] Suruga**
your mother carried a monster in her womb.
***SIGN*** Body
***SIGN*** Womb
**[01:29] Koyomi**
And a year later, Araragi Tsukihi was born.
**[01:34] Koyomi**
The Dying Bird was reborn.
**[01:37] Suruga**
In the larger scheme, it's a harmless creature.
**[01:41] Suruga**
It never hurts anyone.
**[01:43] Suruga**
But it is a fake.
**[01:46] Suruga**
And it is immortal.
**[01:50] Suruga**
Any wound heals instantly.
**[01:52] Suruga**
Any illness vanishes.
**[01:54] Suruga**
It lives out its lifespan.
**[01:56] Suruga**
And then it dies, and is reborn.
**[01:59] Suruga**
It has repeated this cycle up to the modern era.
**[02:03] Suruga**
Just like a cuckoo...
***SIGN*** Episode 11: Tsukihi Phoenix, Part 4
**[02:11] Karen**
Nii-chan, what is this?!
**[02:12] Karen**
What happened?
**[02:13] Karen**
An artillery strike?
**[02:14] Karen**
Have syndicate pursuit teams
fired a cannon at us?
**[02:17] Koyomi**
Honestly, well...
**[02:19] Koyomi**
I don't know.
**[02:21] Koyomi**
I went to Mister Donuts, to take a study break,
**[02:23] Koyomi**
and when I returned, it was like this.
**[02:26] Koyomi**
Maybe a dump truck hit the house,
before driving off.
**[02:31] Karen**
So you've been standing guard...
**[02:34] Karen**
Thanks!
**[02:35] Karen**
But you haven't gotten to study
at all today, have you?
**[02:39] Koyomi**
I guess not.
**[02:40] Karen**
Okay, Nii-chan, I'll take over!
**[02:42] Karen**
Now it's my turn.
**[02:44] Karen**
Until Mom and Dad get home,
**[02:46] Karen**
I shall be Cerberus, Guardian of Hell.
**[02:49] Karen**
So get back to your room and study.
**[02:55] Karen**
By the way, where's Tsukihi-chan?
**[02:58] Koyomi**
I think she was on the second floor
when it happened.
**[03:01] Koyomi**
She watched the front until I returned.
**[03:04] Koyomi**
But since she was here when it happened,
**[03:07] Koyomi**
it was a big shock.
**[03:09] Koyomi**
She's out cold on the second floor.
**[03:11] Karen**
Yeah...
**[03:12] Karen**
She actually gets rattled pretty easily...
**[03:17] Koyomi**
I'm sure you have things you'd like to ask her,
**[03:19] Koyomi**
but she really is fast asleep.
**[03:21] Koyomi**
Let her rest for a while.
**[03:22] Karen**
Aye aye!
**[03:25] Koyomi**
Karen-chan?
**[03:27] Karen**
What is it, Nii-chan?
**[03:28] Koyomi**
Would you be able to die for me?
**[03:32] Karen**
Sure.
**[03:33] Karen**
Why?
**[03:35] Koyomi**
Then, could you die for Tsukihi-chan?
**[03:38] Karen**
I could.
**[03:40] Karen**
With a smile on my face.
**[03:42] Karen**
She's my little sister.
**[03:44] Karen**
Of course I could.
**[03:47] Koyomi**
Yeah, of course.
**[03:49] Koyomi**
And I'd die for you, too.
**[03:53] Koyomi**
Again and again,
**[03:55] Koyomi**
like some immortal Dracula.
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[03:57] Koyomi**
I'd die every day until I was dead.
**[04:06] Koyomi**
Immortal, huh?
**[04:08] Koyomi**
Not a vampire,
**[04:10] Koyomi**
but a phoenix, huh?
**[04:12] Koyomi**
It's all so sudden...
**[04:14] Koyomi**
I can't keep up with everything.
**[04:23] Koyomi**
Hey.
***SIGN*** Hey
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[04:27] Tsukihi**
What are you doing?!
**[04:35] Tsukihi**
I can't believe it...
**[04:36] Tsukihi**
This can't be happening!
**[04:38] Tsukihi**
My first kiss...
**[04:39] Tsukihi**
I was going to give it to Rosokuzawa!
**[04:49] Tsukihi**
What's so funny?!
**[04:51] Koyomi**
Nothing...
**[04:52] Koyomi**
I was just thinking that I felt
nothing when I kissed you.
**[04:56] Koyomi**
It wasn't exciting, and I didn't enjoy it.
**[05:00] Koyomi**
You really are my sister.
**[05:03] Koyomi**
Tsukihi-chan, did you know
**[05:05] Koyomi**
that there was a time when
I wasn't your brother?
**[05:10] Tsukihi**
What are you talking about?
**[05:11] Koyomi**
There was a time when I wasn't
Karen-chan's brother, either.
**[05:14] Koyomi**
For the first three years of
my life, I was an only child.
**[05:18] Koyomi**
And the year after that, I only had one sister.
**[05:22] Koyomi**
It was four years before I finally
became your brother.
**[05:26] Tsukihi**
Well, yeah...
**[05:27] Koyomi**
But, Tsukihi-chan...
**[05:30] Koyomi**
Araragi Tsukihi has always
been my little sister.
**[05:34] Koyomi**
My little sister, as well as
Karen-chan's little sister.
**[05:37] Koyomi**
That has never been untrue.
**[05:42] Koyomi**
Don't count my kiss...
**[05:44] Koyomi**
That's how family works.
**[05:46] Koyomi**
For example, when we were little,
**[05:48] ---**
how many times did we say we
were gonna get married?
**[05:51] Koyomi**
I couldn't tell you.
**[05:53] Koyomi**
Of course, I would've married you both.
**[05:55] Tsukihi**
Stupid.
**[05:56] Tsukihi**
You think you can fool me
by bringing up the past?
***SIGN*** White Scene
**[06:00] Tsukihi**
I'm platinum mad...
**[06:05] Tsukihi**
Hey, Karen-chan.
**[06:07] Tsukihi**
I'm going out for a bit.
**[06:09] Karen**
Okay, bye.
**[06:11] Koyomi**
While I'm gone, keep an eye out.
**[06:13] Koyomi**
No one gets in.
**[06:15] Karen**
Leave it to me.
**[06:16] Karen**
Karen-chan does whatever her brother says.
**[06:29] Suruga**
You're going, my master?
**[06:33] Koyomi**
Yes, I am.
**[06:34] Suruga**
Where? To do what?
**[06:36] Koyomi**
To them. To fight.
**[06:38] Suruga**
Why?
**[06:40] Koyomi**
For my sister.
**[06:41] Suruga**
What will that gain you?
**[06:44] Koyomi**
Nothing at all.
**[06:46] Koyomi**
I'll only waste some time.
**[06:49] Suruga**
I see...
**[06:50] Suruga**
Tsukihi, was it?
**[06:53] Suruga**
Your miniscule sister.
**[06:56] Koyomi**
Yeah...
**[06:58] Koyomi**
What? You learned her name?
**[07:01] Koyomi**
It's rare for you to learn a human's name.
**[07:04] Suruga**
After hearing you scream it so many times...
**[07:07] Suruga**
And it's a good name.
**[07:09] Koyomi**
A good name?
**[07:11] Koyomi**
Is it?
**[07:12] Suruga**
I like the "tsuki," from "moon," part.
**[07:14] Suruga**
The sun is my enemy,
**[07:16] Suruga**
but the moon has been quite good to me.
**[07:19] Suruga**
And so,
**[07:20] Suruga**
perhaps I shall repay it.
**[07:25] Koyomi**
Okay.
**[07:27] Koyomi**
Thanks.
**[07:29] Suruga**
No need for thanks...
***SIGN*** No Entry
***SIGN*** We apologize for the inconvenience, and request your cooperation.
***SIGN*** No Entry
***SIGN*** No Entry
***SIGN*** Beware of
Falling Objects
***SIGN*** Danger
**[07:55] ---**
**[07:55] ---**
***SIGN*** No Entry Watch Your Head
**[07:55] ---**
***SIGN*** No Entry
***SIGN*** Emergency Exit
**[08:01] Yozuru**
Uninvited company...
**[08:04] Yozuru**
Oshino-kun would say "Oh, you're late.
**[08:08] Yozuru**
I've been waiting for you."
**[08:11] Yozuru**
But I'm not that friendly.
**[08:16] Koyomi**
Oshino...
**[08:18] Koyomi**
Oshino was never so violent.
**[08:25] Yozuru**
I'm sure that's true!
**[08:25] Yozuru**
That's how he was...
**[08:27] Yozuru**
That's how it is with him.
**[08:29] Yozuru**
So what do we do?
**[08:32] Yozuru**
An outright brawl is fine with us.
**[08:35] Yozuru**
It's simple.
**[08:37] Yozuru**
We're all about violence.
**[08:39] Yozuru**
And thankfully, both of our teams
include a human and a monster.
**[08:42] Yozuru**
You and me.
**[08:44] Yozuru**
And the former Heart-under-blade-chan; Yotsugi-chan.
**[08:47] Yozuru**
How does that sound?
**[08:52] Yozuru**
Not happy?
**[08:53] Yozuru**
Then, I can take the former Heart-under-blade,
**[08:56] ---**
and you can have Yotsugi.
**[08:59] Yozuru**
She's the one who attacked
your sister, fake or not.
**[09:05] Koyomi**
No,
**[09:05] Koyomi**
the first pairing is better.
**[09:08] Shinobu**
Excellent.
**[09:09] Shinobu**
Then, girl,
**[09:10] Shinobu**
come downstairs.
**[09:12] Shinobu**
There's a perfect room on the
second floor for us to fight in.
**[09:15] Shinobu**
We can enjoy ourselves there.
**[09:18] Shinobu**
I'll show you the difference that
years of experience make.
**[09:22] Yotsugi**
Sure, that's fine.
**[09:24] Yotsugi**
Even after powering up,
you're still weaker than I am.
**[09:28] Yotsugi**
Respect for the Elderly Day is
still a month from now.
**[09:31] Yotsugi**
But if you're willing to force
**[09:33] ---**
that tired old body to show me the
difference of years of experience,
**[09:36] Yotsugi**
I'll go with you,
**[09:38] Yotsugi**
Grannie.
**[09:40] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
**[09:45] Suruga**
You're a minor Far Eastern youkai,
**[09:47] ---**
lacking even existent texts about her.
**[09:49] Suruga**
I'll see to it that you can't ever
have a posed look again.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[09:55] Yotsugi**
Well, I'm off to take care of
the elderly, Onee-chan.
**[10:00] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[10:07] Koyomi**
Kagenui-san, what's your relationship to Oshino?
**[10:12] Koyomi**
You know the idiot in the
Hawaiian shirt, Oshino Meme?
***SIGN***
**[10:17] Yozuru**
What? Oshino-kun's still wearing those shirts?
**[10:22] Yozuru**
I thought it was just some kind of trademark,
**[10:24] Yozuru**
but if he's still doing it, perhaps
there's a deeper reason...
**[10:29] Yozuru**
Well, it's nothing really.
**[10:33] Yozuru**
Just an old friend.
**[10:35] Yozuru**
Oshino-kun, Kaiki-kun, and I
**[10:37] Yozuru**
were all university classmates.
**[10:41] Koyomi**
Oshino, okay...
**[10:43] Koyomi**
But Kaiki?
**[10:44] Koyomi**
*Kaiki?*
**[10:44] Koyomi**
*Did she say Kaiki?*
**[10:46] Koyomi**
Kaiki...
**[10:47] Koyomi**
You mean Kaiki Deishuu?
***SIGN*** Shinto Studies
***SIGN*** Student Building
***SIGN*** Gallery
***SIGN*** Social Work Department
***SIGN*** Cafeteria
**[10:49] Yozuru**
That's right. Kaiki-kun...
**[10:51] Yozuru**
We shared a major, and he was in my club.
***SIGN*** Campus Map
**[10:53] Yozuru**
We used to play four-person shogi
with another upperclassman.
**[10:58] Koyomi**
Was it the shogi research club?
**[11:01] Yozuru**
No, the occult research club.
**[11:03] Yozuru**
Actually, it was Kaiki-kun who
was kind enough to tell us
**[11:08] Yozuru**
about your sister.
**[11:16] Koyomi**
Kaiki!
**[11:18] Koyomi**
So this was all your fault?
**[11:20] Koyomi**
It was all your doing?!
**[11:26] Koyomi**
Kagenui-san.
**[11:27] Koyomi**
I'm on my sister's side in this.
**[11:30] Yozuru**
Your sister is a fake.
**[11:33] Yozuru**
She isn't your real sister.
**[11:35] Yozuru**
Even if you recognize that the sister
you believed to be real is a fake,
**[11:40] Yozuru**
can you truly love her, as you always have?
**[11:44] Koyomi**
I can.
**[11:45] Koyomi**
No, I'll love her even more.
**[11:48] Koyomi**
Isn't it hot,
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[11:50] Koyomi**
having a sister who isn't your real sister?!
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[11:57] Yozuru**
I understand your feelings.
**[11:59] Yozuru**
And I suppose I must respect them.
**[12:02] Yozuru**
But from the perspective of a good guy like me...
***SIGN*** Yellow Scene
**[12:06] Yozuru**
Nothing I say will change your mind.
**[12:09] Yozuru**
I've given up trying to convince you.
**[12:12] Yozuru**
I'm different from Oshino-kun
and Kaiki-kun, after all.
**[12:16] Yozuru**
I can only speak with my fists.
**[12:18] Yozuru**
But... But...
**[12:20] Yozuru**
I wonder.
**[12:22] Yozuru**
Even if you're all right with it...
***SIGN*** Red Scene
***SIGN*** Yellow Scene
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[12:38] Yozuru**
Even if you're all right with it,
**[12:41] Yozuru**
how about the rest of your family?!
**[12:49] Yozuru**
You were once immortal.
**[12:53] Yozuru**
So perhaps you'd be fine
**[12:54] Yozuru**
with a fake sister who's an immortal creature.
**[12:58] Yozuru**
But how about the rest of your family?
**[13:00] ---**
Those who have nothing to do
with the supernatural?
**[13:06] Yozuru**
For example, Karen-chan, was it?
**[13:08] Yozuru**
If your other sister knew her little sister
**[13:10] ---**
is a supernatural creature,
**[13:13] ---**
could she answer the same way?
**[13:16] Yozuru**
Or your mother?
**[13:17] Yozuru**
If she knew that she birthed a monster,
**[13:21] ---**
could she say the same thing as you?
**[13:24] Yozuru**
What about your father?!
**[13:32] Yozuru**
And what about her?
**[13:35] Yozuru**
If the fake knew everything,
**[13:37] Yozuru**
could she continue living
**[13:39] Yozuru**
like she always has?
**[13:43] Yozuru**
Everything's all right now,
because she doesn't know.
**[13:46] Yozuru**
But when she finds out,
**[13:48] Yozuru**
won't she be hurt?
**[13:51] Yozuru**
An immortal monster cannot
adapt to its surroundings...
**[13:55] Yozuru**
You should know that better than anyone.
**[13:57] Yozuru**
Or will she try to be a hero,
with her inhuman body?
**[14:02] Yozuru**
The Fire Sisters, wasn't it?
**[14:05] Yozuru**
But how proud, how cruel
**[14:08] Yozuru**
could an immortal monster be toward humans?
**[14:13] Yozuru**
You know that better than anyone, as well!
***SIGN*** Black Scene
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[14:19] Yozuru**
Our job is to stop it before that happens.
**[14:23] Yozuru**
Whatever you value...
**[14:25] ---**
What you consider right is up to you.
**[14:28] Yozuru**
But don't force it onto other people!
***SIGN*** Red Scene
**[14:38] Yozuru**
I'm not finished yet.
**[14:42] Yozuru**
I'm starting to worry about Yotsugi, also.
**[14:45] Yozuru**
Let's go take a look!
**[14:55] Suruga**
What are you doing,
**[14:57] Suruga**
my master?
**[15:02] Yozuru**
What?
**[15:03] Yozuru**
For all her big talk, this is as far as she got?
**[15:06] Yozuru**
Looks like you're having a tough time, Yotsugi.
**[15:10] Yotsugi**
I was preparing to stage an elaborate comeback.
**[15:13] Yotsugi**
Don't worry about me when
you don't have to, Onee-chan.
**[15:17] Yotsugi**
I said, with a posed look.
**[15:19] Yozuru**
Right, right.
**[15:21] Yozuru**
But allow your sister to have this pleasure.
**[15:25] Yozuru**
Former Heart-under-blade,
**[15:27] Yozuru**
want to have a final round with me?
**[15:46] Suruga**
No, I won't fight.
**[15:49] Suruga**
And a final round?
**[15:52] Suruga**
Don't be stupid, human.
**[15:54] Suruga**
My master hasn't lost to you yet.
**[15:59] Suruga**
Correct, my master?
**[16:04] Koyomi**
That's right.
**[16:05] Koyomi**
I haven't lost yet...
**[16:09] Koyomi**
I haven't conceded to you yet.
**[16:13] Koyomi**
Not to your fists or to your words.
**[16:19] Koyomi**
I haven't accepted either!
**[16:23] Yozuru**
Didn't you listen to me?
**[16:24] Yozuru**
Whatever you value...
**[16:27] ---**
What you consider right is up to you.
**[16:30] Yozuru**
But don't force those ideals onto other people.
**[16:35] Koyomi**
It isn't "other people."
**[16:37] Koyomi**
Not "other people."
**[16:40] Koyomi**
It's my family.
**[16:42] Koyomi**
I'll force my ideals on my family.
**[16:46] Koyomi**
And since they're family, I'll lie to them.
**[16:48] Koyomi**
I'll deceive them. I'll cause trouble for them.
**[16:50] Koyomi**
I'll make them worry.
**[16:52] Koyomi**
I'll owe them things...
**[16:55] Koyomi**
Things I'll never be able to repay.
**[16:58] Koyomi**
However, I think that's okay.
**[17:02] Koyomi**
Kagenui-san...
**[17:04] Koyomi**
Miss Good Guy.
**[17:07] Koyomi**
If you say that being a fake is evil,
**[17:10] Koyomi**
then I will shoulder the burden of that evil.
**[17:13] Koyomi**
If lying is evil,
**[17:16] Koyomi**
then I'm fine with being evil.
**[17:18] Koyomi**
I don't need them to like me.
**[17:21] Koyomi**
I'm fine with being the worst kind of person.
**[17:23] Tsukihi**
Onii-chan!
**[17:24] Koyomi**
As long as she calls me that,
**[17:28] Koyomi**
it's enough for me...
**[17:32] Yozuru**
The theory of fundamental evil?
**[17:34] Yozuru**
As a high school student, you've learned
the theory of fundamental good, right?
**[17:37] Yozuru**
It was a concept developed by
Chinese philosopher Mencius.
**[17:41] Yozuru**
He said that humans are born
fundamentally good.
**[17:44] Yozuru**
That's the one.
**[17:46] Koyomi**
Um...
**[17:47] Yozuru**
If the theory of fundamental good is an ideal,
**[17:50] Yozuru**
the theory of fundamental evil is simple realism.
**[17:51] Yozuru**
Desire lies at the core of human nature.
**[17:54] Yozuru**
And humans are ruled by these desires.
**[17:57] Yozuru**
That was the less tactful theory of Xun Zi.
**[18:00] Yozuru**
He claimed that humans are born evil.
**[18:04] Koyomi**
Born
**[18:06] Koyomi**
evil?
**[18:07] Yozuru**
Yes.
**[18:08] Yozuru**
Thus, if a person does good,
**[18:11] ---**
that is not their true self, but a lie.
**[18:15] Yozuru**
That was his theory.
**[18:16] Yozuru**
It would be a lie, a fake,
**[18:19] Yozuru**
and due only to hypocrisy...
**[18:21] Koyomi**
Hypocrisy.
**[18:22] Yozuru**
Artificial. And thus,
by definition, deliberate.
**[18:25] Yozuru**
He said all good is thereby
hypocrisy, and therefore,
**[18:30] Yozuru**
it constitutes a deliberate attempt to be good.
**[18:34] Yozuru**
It was a game that Kaiki-kun
often used to discuss...
**[18:38] Yozuru**
Given the real thing,
and an indistinguishable fake,
**[18:43] ---**
which is worth more?
**[18:46] Koyomi**
The real thing and a fake...
**[18:49] Yozuru**
Naturally, my response was that
**[18:51] Yozuru**
the real thing was worth more.
**[18:54] Yozuru**
Oshino-kun asserted that they
had equal value, though.
**[18:58] Yozuru**
But here is Kaiki-kun's argument:
**[19:01] Yozuru**
The fake is of far greater value.
**[19:05] Yozuru**
In its deliberate attempt to be real,
**[19:08] ---**
it's more real than the real thing.
**[19:13] Yozuru**
Kaiki-kun's such a petty villain,
**[19:16] ---**
but he does say some neat things.
**[19:19] Yozuru**
I suppose you could say
**[19:20] Yozuru**
that's the lesson for us here.
**[19:25] Yozuru**
It took us ten years to learn, though.
**[19:30] Yozuru**
We're leaving.
**[19:31] Yozuru**
We lose.
**[19:36] Koyomi**
U-Um, Kagenui-san?
**[19:38] Yozuru**
Bored.
**[19:39] Yozuru**
We're leaving.
**[19:41] Yozuru**
I can't fight when I'm feeling strange like this.
**[19:47] Yozuru**
*Unlimited Rulebook.*
**[19:49] Yozuru**
You can shoot a bird, but not one that's nesting.
***SIGN*** Unlimited Rulebook
A rulebook mostly filled with exceptions.
**[19:53] Yozuru**
We'll just call your little sister an exception.
**[19:57] Yozuru**
In a way, you're her mentor,
so keep a close watch over her.
**[20:01] Yozuru**
Anyway, you weren't ever
**[20:03] ---**
really serious about fighting us, were you?
**[20:08] Koyomi**
We weren't serious?
**[20:09] Yozuru**
I never sensed a desire to kill.
**[20:12] Yozuru**
I don't think you were holding back.
**[20:14] Yozuru**
But to be honest, it wasn't much fun for me.
**[20:18] Koyomi**
If you didn't think I wanted to kill you,
**[20:21] Koyomi**
that's because you treated me like
a human being, Kagenui-san.
**[20:27] Koyomi**
You said we both had a human
and a monster, right?
**[20:31] Koyomi**
Since I became this way, only Oshino
referred to me as a human being.
**[20:37] Koyomi**
So I'm the one who wasn't really into it.
**[20:40] Koyomi**
I felt weird, and I didn't want to fight.
**[20:43] Koyomi**
It's like when I was facing that
old guy in the Hawaiian shirt.
**[20:48] Yozuru**
I suppose I've ended up acting
like Oshino-kun here.
**[20:53] Yozuru**
I kind of regret it...
**[20:56] Yozuru**
Pathetic.
**[20:57] Yozuru**
So I guess I'll end this
**[20:59] Yozuru**
with something Oshino-kun would never say.
**[21:07] Yozuru**
Goodbye.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[21:27] Tsukihi**
I was worried you were going to kiss me again,
**[21:30] Tsukihi**
but I guess you weren't.
**[21:33] Tsukihi**
Good morning. Welcome home.
**[21:35] Tsukihi**
Where were you?
**[21:36] Koyomi**
Actually, I just went out and
fought a human like a monster,
**[21:40] ---**
and a monster like a human, all for you.
**[21:44] Tsukihi**
That was kind of you. Thanks.
**[21:48] Tsukihi**
Don't overdo it.
**[21:49] Koyomi**
Just let me. I do it because I want to.
**[21:52] Tsukihi**
I know, I know.
**[21:54] Tsukihi**
You love us.
**[21:58] Koyomi**
Don't take it like that.
**[22:00] Koyomi**
I hate you both.
**[22:03] Koyomi**
Once summer break ends,
**[22:06] ---**
I'll introduce you to my girlfriend.
**[22:10] Tsukihi**
What, Onii-chan?
**[22:11] Tsukihi**
You have a girlfriend?
**[22:13] Koyomi**
Yeah, ever since May.
**[22:15] Tsukihi**
I'm platinum mad!
**[22:17] Koyomi**
Don't tell her anything she
doesn't need to know.
***SIGN*** Black Scene
**[22:21] Koyomi**
I got way more involved than usual,
**[22:25] Koyomi**
but there was no point in
staying there forever.
**[22:27] Koyomi**
For now, I'll go back to my room and change.
**[22:31] Koyomi**
It's gotten quite late while
I was doing all this.
**[22:36] ---**
It's time for this monster to bow out.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued