# E5 - Osomatsu-san in the Summer
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRZX1848Y/osomatsu-san-in-the-summer)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** "Cicadas"
**[00:23] Nanami**
Takkun...
**[00:25] Takkun**
Nanami...
**[00:27] Nanami**
I... worked really hard to make this.
**[00:31] Nanami**
Please take it.
***SIGN*** Good Luck Charm
**[00:33] Takkun**
Th-Thanks...
**[00:45] Nanami**
Takkun... Take me to the Koushien!
**[00:53] Takkun**
Nanami...
**[00:56] Takkun**
I, Uebayashi Tatsuo,
**[00:59] Takkun**
want you, Asaoka Nanami, to know...
**[01:01] Nanami**
What? I can't hear you, Takkun.
**[01:03] Nanami**
The cicadas are so loud
that I can't hear you.
**[01:05] Takkun**
I, Uebayashi Tatsuo...
**[01:07] Nanami**
What?!
**[01:07] Takkun**
I, Uebayashi Tatsuo...
**[01:09] Nanami**
Say what?!
**[01:09] Takkun**
I, Uebayashi Tatsuo, want you,
Asaoka Nanami, to know...
**[01:12] Nanami**
What?! I can't hear you at all!
**[01:14] Takkun**
That I love you!
**[01:15] Nanami**
Huh?
**[01:15] Takkun**
I love you!
**[01:17] Nanami**
Wha?!
**[01:17] Takkun**
I said I love you!
**[01:18] Nanami**
What?!
**[01:19] Takkun**
I want you to go out with me!
**[01:20] Nanami**
Huh?!
**[01:21] Takkun**
Please be my girlfriend!
**[01:22] Nanami**
Ugh. I can't hear you at all!
**[01:25] Nanami**
Takkun, you idiot!
**[01:27] Takkun**
Nanami!
***SIGN*** "Jyushimatsu
Calisthenics"
**[03:16] radio**
* Raise your arms up high.*
* We'll start with stretches!*
**[03:20] Radio**
*One, two, three, four, five, six, seven...*
**[03:21] Jyushi**
Hup!
**[03:23] Jyushi**
Hup!
**[03:25] Radio**
*Now your arms and legs.*
**[03:26] Jyushi**
Hup!
**[03:26] Radio**
*One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight.*
**[03:28] Jyushi**
Hup!
**[03:30] Jyushi**
Hup!
**[03:30] Radio**
*Two, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight...*
**[03:33] Jyushi**
Hup!
**[03:35] Jyushi**
Hup!
**[03:35] ---**
*Three, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight...*
**[03:36] Jyushi**
Take that!
**[03:39] Jyushi**
And that!
**[03:40] Jyushi**
Hup, two!
**[03:40] ---**
*Four, two, three, four,
five, six, seven...*
**[03:42] Jyushi**
Yeah, exercise!
**[03:44] Radio**
*Swing your arms.*
**[03:45] Radio**
*One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight...*
**[03:50] Radio**
*Two, two, three, four, five, six, seven...*
**[03:50] Jyushi**
How's that?
**[03:53] Radio**
*Next, chest exercises.*
**[03:54] Radio**
*One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight...*
**[03:55] Jyushi**
Oh, man. Oh, man!
**[03:59] Radio**
*Two, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight...*
**[03:59] Jyushi**
Boeh!
**[04:01] Jyushi**
Boeh!
**[04:03] Jyushi**
Boeh!
**[04:03] ---**
*Three, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight...*
**[04:05] Jyushi**
Boehba!
**[04:07] Jyushi**
Boehba!
**[04:07] ---**
*Four, two, three, four,
five, six, seven...*
**[04:09] Jyushi**
Boehba!
**[04:11] Radio**
*Next, side stretches.*
**[04:12] Jyushi**
Boehba!
**[04:13] Radio**
*One, two, three...*
***SIGN*** Well Done
**[04:19] Jyushi**
Just 39 more days.
**[04:21] Jyushi**
I'll do my best!
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** "Joozu"
***SIGN*** Look out for sharks!
***SIGN*** Beware of Sharks
***SIGN*** Danger! Sharks!
***SIGN*** No Swimming!
**[05:13] Hata**
Joo...
**[05:15] Hata**
zu.
**[05:19] Jyushi**
Huh?
**[05:27] Both**
Oh.
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** "It's Hot"
**[05:36] Iyami**
It's hot...
**[05:40] Iyami**
It's hot...
**[05:43] Iyami**
It's hot...
**[05:46] Iyami**
It's hot...
**[05:49] Chibi**
Hey! Stop saying "It's hot" so much!
**[05:52] Chibi**
You're making it worse!
**[05:54] Chibi**
Hot!
**[05:56] Iyami**
Chibita, we have no choice now.
**[06:00] Chibi**
Oh, that. Whenever we're in trouble...
**[06:04] Both**
...we go see Professor Dekapan!
**[06:08] Deka**
Unfortunately, my air conditioner is broken.
**[06:12] Iyami**
Sheeeh!
**[06:12] Both**
But why?
**[06:15] Dayon**
It wasn't me.
**[06:17] Dayon**
I didn't touch it. Honest.
**[06:27] Deka**
Well, no need to feel down.
Summer is meant to be hot.
**[06:31] Deka**
I believe you're meant to take
in that heat and enjoy—
**[06:35] Chibi**
You idjit!
**[06:38] Deka**
Stop!
**[06:39] Deka**
O-Okay! I'll make something good!
**[06:44] Deka**
It's finished.
**[06:45] Iyami**
Sheeeh!
**[06:48] Iyami**
It's so nice and cool!
**[06:50] Chibi**
It's not hot at all! It's nice and cool!
**[06:53] Both**
Yay!
**[06:54] Iyami**
It's so cool!
**[06:55] Chibi**
It's so cool, you idjit! Damn it!
**[06:56] Deka**
Good, good.
**[06:57] Iyami**
It's so cool, isn't it, Chibita?
**[06:58] Dayon**
This is the ultimate VR!
**[06:59] Chibita**
It's so cool, Iyami!
**[07:05] Chibi**
This is the best, you idjit! It's heaven!
**[07:10] Iyami**
It's so cool!
**[07:12] Chibi**
So cool! Yay!
**[07:14] Iyami**
It's so friggin' cool!
**[07:16] Chibi**
It's cool, you idjit! Damn it!
**[07:19] Chibi**
Yay!
**[07:21] Iyami**
So cool!
**[07:22] Chibi**
It's so cool!
**[07:25] Iyami**
It's too cool!
**[07:28] Chibi**
It's too cool!
**[07:29] Iyami**
Sheeeh! It's so cool!
**[07:30] Chibi**
It's cool, you idjit! Damn it!
**[07:33] Iyami**
It's cool.
**[07:34] Chibi**
It's cool, you idjit!
**[07:38] Both**
So cool!
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** "Exiled"
**[07:50] Girl**
What? Oh, really?
**[07:53] Aida**
Hey, Totty.
**[07:56] Sachiko**
Want to take a picture with us?
**[07:58] Todo**
A picture? Sure!
**[08:00] Sachiko**
Okay, here we go!
**[08:02] Todo**
So very awesome!
**[08:03] Sachi**
Okay, say cheese!
***SIGN*** He is a criminal. Please do not save him.
**[08:16] Oso**
Exiled.
**[08:17] Ichi**
Yup, exiled.
**[08:18] Todo**
What?!
**[08:18] Todo**
Hey! Hey, wait! Hey!
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** "Exiled 2"
**[08:28] Aida**
Wow, a deserted island.
**[08:32] Aida**
Wow, I've never been to
a deserted island before.
**[08:36] Sachi**
Hey, Totty, what are you doing? Hurry up.
**[08:44] Sachi**
Hey, Totty, we're talking to you.
**[08:46] Todo**
Yeah, I'll be right there.
**[08:48] Todo**
Okay, looks like we're good.
They wouldn't come this far...
**[08:52] Todo**
This is amazing! Are we the only ones here?
**[08:54] Todo**
Deserted islands are awesome!
**[08:58] Todo**
Huh? What?!
***SIGN*** He is a criminal. Please do not save him.
**[08:59] Todo**
Hey!
**[09:01] Todo**
What?! Wait!
**[09:02] Jyushi**
Exiled!
**[09:03] Choro**
Yup, exiled.
**[09:04] Kara**
Recite some Japanese poetry
alone, or something.
**[09:04] Todo**
W-Wait!
**[09:05] Todo**
Hey! Hey!
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** "Exiled 3"
***SIGN*** Southern
**[09:20] Aida**
Totty? Aren't you coming to the beach?
**[09:22] Totty**
No. I'm never going near the ocean again.
**[09:26] Aida**
Aww...
**[09:27] Totty**
Sorry. Let's play on land next time.
**[09:31] Totty**
Hey, I know. Wanna exchange
contact information?
**[09:33] Aida**
Sure.
**[09:36] Todo**
Let's see... Oh, here we go.
**[09:41] Todo**
Huh?
**[09:42] Todo**
What?!
**[09:44] Todo**
Come on!
**[09:49] Todo**
Hey! Hey!
**[09:51] Todo**
Hey!
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** "Fireworks"
**[10:08] Oso**
Say, Choromatsu.
**[10:10] Oso**
Wanna trade your grilled
squid for my skewer
**[10:12] Oso**
that had the grilled squid
I finished eating on it?
**[10:16] Choro**
When are the fireworks gonna start?
**[10:18] Todo**
It's still not time?
**[10:20] Jyushi**
Fireworks! Fireworks!
**[10:21] Jyushi**
Yay!
**[10:23] Oso**
Foo! Yeah!
**[10:26] Announce**
*Thank you for waiting.*
**[10:28] Announce**
*Please enjoy the fireworks.*
**[10:42] Choro**
Oh, here it comes!
**[10:44] Oso**
It's about time!
***SIGN*** Buzz Buzz Buzz Buzz Buzz Buzz
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** Summer Kamen
**[11:55] Kara**
Summer Kamen!
**[12:00] Girl**
It's so hot.
**[12:01] Guy**
It is. Look, I'm sweating like crazy.
**[12:04] Girl**
You're right.
***SIGN*** Young-Wife- Apartments
**[12:10] Kara**
Nice summer!
**[12:15] Guy**
I feel alive again!
**[12:16] Kara**
Good summer!
**[12:19] Boy**
Yay! I caught a rhinoceros beetle!
**[12:20] Kid**
Awesome!
**[12:21] Kara**
800 summer!
**[12:24] Mom**
So close! Too bad.
**[12:26] Kara**
Perfect summer!
**[12:29] Man**
Look at your farmer's tan!
**[12:31] Kara**
20,000 summer!
***SIGN*** Oh, Summer Vacation
**[12:41] Kara**
Summer!
**[12:44] ---**
It's summer!
**[12:47] Kara**
Summer!
**[12:52] Kara**
*The name's Summer Kamen!*
**[12:54] Kara**
* Every year when summer rolls around,*
* I walk around town looking for summer,*
**[12:57] Kara**
*inject even more summer,*
**[12:59] Kara**
* and watch everyone enjoy summer even*
* more while I enjoy the rest of summer.*
**[13:04] Kara**
*That is me, summer.*
**[13:06] Kara**
*Hmm? You don't understand?*
**[13:07] Kara**
*You don't have to.*
**[13:09] Kara**
*My season is here. Thank you.*
**[13:14] Kara**
* Now, my problem is the spineless*
* boys who live here.*
**[13:21] Jyushi**
It's hot...
**[13:23] Jyushi**
I can't.
**[13:25] Kara**
Oh, bad summer.
**[13:28] Choro**
I love you, air conditioner.
**[13:29] Kara**
Eleven summer.
**[13:31] Totty**
This sucks. I don't want to get burnt.
**[13:33] Kara**
Six summer.
**[13:36] Ichi**
Drinking hot tea in an
air-conditioned room...
**[13:39] Kara**
No good summer.
**[13:41] Oso**
Eating ramen in an air-conditioned
room is great, too.
**[13:44] Kara**
Oh, too bad summer.
**[13:46] Both**
Shut up!
**[13:48] Oso**
What's your deal, barging in here
saying "summer, summer"?
**[13:50] Oso**
It's creepy as hell.
**[13:52] Ichimatsu**
Who the hell are you?
**[13:54] Kara**
Me?
**[13:56] Kara**
I'm Summer Kamen.
**[13:57] Both**
Who?!
**[13:59] Kara**
What's wrong with all of you?
You're pathetic!
**[14:01] Kara**
You're letting the heat
of summer get to you!
**[14:04] Choro**
I'm pretty sure it's *your* head
that the heat got to.
**[14:07] Kara**
Wow, wow, wow! 4,000 summer!
**[14:10] Choro**
I don't get how this works.
Why did he give me summers just now?
**[14:14] Kara**
All of you lack summer! You need to
inject more summer into your lives!
**[14:17] Kara**
I'm telling you to brush up on your own
summers for the impending real summer.
**[14:22] Todo**
What are you talking about?
**[14:23] Jyushi**
Get lost!
**[14:24] Ichi**
Scram.
**[14:25] todo**
What's so good about summer anyway?
**[14:26] Choro**
It's hot, and you just sweat.
**[14:27] Oso**
The beach gets crowded, too.
**[14:29] Ichi**
Plus fireworks, packed trains...
**[14:29] Kara**
Good grief. I guess I have no choice
but to use this technique.
**[14:30] Oso**
I hate it.
**[14:31] Choro**
Hurry up and end, summer.
**[14:32] Kara**
You tiny d*cks that lack
summer... Take this!
**[14:37] Kara**
Summer Flash!
**[14:40] Kara**
Summer!
**[14:42] Kara**
Summer!
**[14:44] Kara**
Summer!
**[14:47] Kara**
Oh, summer!
**[14:49] Kara**
Changing Summer!
**[15:03] Five**
It's summer!
**[15:05] All**
Wow!
**[15:08] All**
It's so fun!
**[15:08] Kara**
Well? How do you like the rays? The location?
**[15:09] Bg**
It's summer! It's summer!
**[15:12] Kara**
Well?!
**[15:13] Five**
Nice summer!
**[15:15] Kara**
Hmm?
**[15:15] Five**
Good summer!
**[15:17] Kara**
What was that?
**[15:19] Five**
King of Summer!
**[15:22] Kara**
Good.
**[15:23] Five**
Summer!
**[15:26] Oso**
Thank you, Summer Kamen!
**[15:28] Choro**
Now we can have a great summer.
**[15:30] Totty**
Thanks!
**[15:32] Kara**
Summer, summer is here.
**[15:36] Kara**
Melt your brain, it's 2,000 summer.
**[15:39] Kara**
Brush up on your own summer.
***SIGN*** Summer Kamen
**[15:43] Kara**
Aah, 50,000 summer!
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** Summer Kamen
**[15:48] Kara**
50,000, 50,000 summer!
**[15:56] Toto**
It's summer!
**[15:57] Toto**
It's the ocean! Yay!
***SIGN*** "Totoko in
the Summer"
**[16:03] Toto**
Oh, there they are!
**[16:05] Toto**
Take that!
**[16:08] Toto**
And that!
**[16:13] Toto**
Snipe!
**[16:15] Girl**
There!
**[16:17] Toto**
Kaboom!
**[16:18] Toto**
Not done yet!
**[16:30] Toto**
It's summer!
**[16:44] Toto**
Ah, I feel so much better.
***SIGN*** Mr. Osomatsu
***SIGN*** "This Year,
We'll Finally..."
**[17:02] Girl**
Hey!
**[17:03] Girl**
Jeez.
**[17:14] Oso**
Man, these sunglasses are so convenient.
**[17:18] Choro**
They are. We're boldly staring at girls'
boobs and butts, and no one's getting angry.
**[17:25] Kara**
The most important factor in girl
watching is calm, Choromatsu.
**[17:31] Choro**
That's really helpful!
**[17:32] Four**
Thanks!
**[17:37] Kara**
I don't mind taking back my
sunglasses right now, you know.
**[17:41] Ichi**
Thanks!
**[17:43] Oso**
Now then, which one should we choose?
**[17:45] Choro**
Which girl should we pick?
**[17:47] Oso**
What about her?
**[17:48] Oso**
Isn't she cute?
**[17:49] Todo**
She's super cute!
**[17:50] Jyushi**
Cute!
**[17:51] Oso**
And she's got huge boobs!
**[17:52] Five**
Yeah.
**[17:53] Oso**
She's with other girls,
so she might not have a boyfriend.
**[17:56] Five**
Yeah!
**[17:56] Oso**
That's awesome!
**[17:58] Five**
It is!
**[17:59] Oso**
All right, someone go talk to her.
**[18:07] Oso**
Man, these sunglasses are so convenient.
**[18:10] Choro**
They are. We're boldly staring at girls'
boobs and butts, and no one's getting angry.
**[18:15] Totty**
Hang on. Are we stuck in some infinite loop?
**[18:18] Totty**
You guys keep talking, but not acting.
**[18:25] Oso**
All right, I'll go.
**[18:27] Oso**
I'm gonna do this! The eldest is
going to show you how it's done!
**[18:30] Todo**
So cool!
**[18:31] Choro**
Idiots are so amazing.
**[18:33] Jyushi**
I'm not an idiot!
**[18:34] Choro**
Uh, I wasn't talking about you.
**[18:37] Choro**
Huh?
**[18:50] Oso**
Man, talk about awesome.
**[18:53] Five**
Hey!
**[18:53] Oso**
They're all so plump.
***SIGN*** Fancy Ice
**[18:55] Todo**
What are you doing?
**[18:56] Oso**
So plump.
**[18:57] Kara**
You're all talk. Pathetic.
**[18:59] Oso**
Seriously, extremely plump.
**[19:00] Choro**
Did you see some shrimp or something?!
**[19:02] Choro**
Would you shut up about things being plump?!
**[19:04] Oso**
Well, can you go do it?
Stop acting all high and mighty.
**[19:07] Choro**
No, no. I'm not interested
in things like this.
**[19:10] All**
Grr.
**[19:11] Choro**
I mean, even if it worked out,
it'd all be over once summer ended.
**[19:14] Choro**
Since we're all adults here,
**[19:16] Choro**
I don't see any point in pursuing
pointless relationships like—
**[19:19] Jyushi**
Up we go!
**[19:23] Todo**
He went flying.
**[19:24] Oso**
So, who's gonna go next?
**[19:27] Kara**
Very well, I accept. I'll go round up
all the Karamatsu girls on the beach!
**[19:39] Ichi**
All right. I'll go.
**[19:40] Five**
What?!
**[19:42] Todo**
Wait, wait, wait, wait, what?
**[19:44] Todo**
You're going to go, Ichimatsu-niisan?
**[19:45] Ichi**
Yeah.
**[19:46] Oso**
You don't need to push yourself like that.
**[19:47] Kara**
Don't push yourself, Ichimatsu.
**[19:49] Jyushi**
Ichimatsu-niisan.
**[19:50] Todo**
Really, it's okay. We won't force you.
**[19:52] Oso**
You don't have to go along with us.
**[19:54] Kara**
I'm worried.
**[19:55] Jyushi**
Ichimatsu-niisan.
**[19:56] Todo**
Just sit down, okay? No, really.
**[19:57] Ichi**
Shut up!
**[19:59] Ichi**
Why am I the only one you treat like that?!
**[20:01] Ichi**
Are you trying to be nice?
It just pisses me off!
**[20:03] Ichi**
I can be a man when it comes to it!
**[20:06] Todo**
I-I'm sorry...
**[20:07] Oso**
Don't get so angry.
**[20:13] Both**
Now you're not gonna go?!
**[20:14] Oso**
Really? You're not going after all that?!
***SIGN*** Hard Rock Kiyoshi
**[20:16] Oso**
Why'd you get mad, then?!
**[20:17] Ichi**
A guy like me is here at the beach in summer.
You can't ask any more of me.
**[20:22] Oso**
We know! That's why we tried to stop you!
**[20:25] Kara**
Which means it's finally my turn, brothers!
**[20:33] Oso**
Jyushimatsu?
**[20:34] Oso**
You're going? Seriously?
**[20:35] Todo**
Well, he is the dark horse out of all of us
**[20:37] Todo**
who's actually had somewhat of a girlfriend.
**[20:40] Ichi**
Is he going to show us his skills now?
**[20:42] Kara**
Are you finally going to move forward
to find a new love, Jyushimatsu?
**[20:48] Kara**
You just needed to relieve
yourself, Jyushimatsu?
**[20:52] Todo**
I guess there's no other choice.
**[20:53] Todo**
Totty, you'll just have to
use the ace up your sleeve.
**[20:56] Oso**
Huh?
**[20:58] Todo**
Listen. If we keep trying this by one by one,
**[21:01] Todo**
we virgin NEETs stand no chance
against the summer beach.
**[21:04] Totty**
We all have to go at once.
**[21:05] Five**
All of us?!
**[21:06] Totty**
That's right. The sextuplets push.
**[21:08] Five**
Sextuplets push?!
**[21:09] Todo**
That's our one and only weapon.
**[21:11] Todo**
We flaunt the special trait we have
that no one else has to draw interest.
**[21:15] Todo**
I don't know if it'll make girls like us, though.
**[21:16] Choro**
I see. So we're going to bet
on our numbers, right, Sensei?
**[21:20] Todo**
No. But it'll at least
create an opportunity.
**[21:24] Todo**
You guys ready?
**[21:25] Five**
Yeah...
**[21:27] Todo**
We're sextuplets!
**[21:29] Choro**
We're sextuplets!
**[21:31] Todo**
We have the same face!
**[21:33] Both**
We have the same face!
**[21:35] Todo**
We're sextuplets!
**[21:37] Both**
We're sextuplets!
**[21:39] Todo**
We're all sextuplets...
**[21:40] Both**
...with the same face!
**[21:42] Oso**
Anyone want us?
**[21:43] Guy**
Hey, what's up with those guys?
**[21:44] Guy 2**
Aren't sextuplets a lot?
**[21:46] Guy 2**
I've seen twins before,
but they're sextuplets!
**[21:48] Guy 2**
Isn't that a lot?
**[21:55] Girl**
Can we take a picture with you?
**[21:57] Guy**
Do the same pose, like sextuplets!
**[22:03] Six**
Sheeeh...
**[22:07] Girls**
What's with these guys? They're hilarious!
**[22:09] Oso**
W-We'll have to try again next year...
**[22:12] Girl**
Seriously?
**[22:12] Five**
Yeah...
***SIGN*** Next Time on Mr. Osomatsu
**[23:44] Iyami**
There's always someone better than you.
**[23:46] Iyami**
The sextuplets don't
understand that at all!
**[23:50] Iyami**
Observe me, and get a clue.
Sheeeh, sheeeh, sheeeh!
***SIGN*** "Iyami Has Arrived" etc.