E22 - The Star of Hope, Todomatsu / Final Sheeeh Source: Crunchyroll Translator: Editor: Timer: QC: (Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.) SIGN    Matsu SIGN    "The Star of Hope, Todomatsu" [01:33] Todo     What should I do? [01:34] Todo     We need one more person for the mixer. [01:37] Todo     If I can't find someone, it'll be called off. [01:40] Todo     Let's see... The requirements are a guy in his 20s [01:43] Todo     who's hot and energetic. [01:46] Todo     But someone who looks better than me is a no. [01:49] Todo     That would decrease my chances. [01:52] Todo     I'd like it to be a guy who's a bit ugly, [01:53] Todo     who can't brag about his job     and doesn't have any status. [01:56] Todo     But someone who's easy to     talk to would be nice... [02:00] Todo     Isn't there anyone? [02:04] Todo     Oh! [02:05] Todo     What about Atsushi-kun? [02:07] Todo     No, wait. He's top tier. [02:09] Todo     He's not bad to look at and has a car. [02:12] Todo     What about Shittysuke? [02:13] Todo     No, he'll scare the girls away. [02:16] Todo     Hey, what about Normalmaru?     Yeah, he's just about right. [02:20] Todo     But I have a hard time talking to him. [02:24] Todo     There just isn't anyone I know [02:25] Todo     who's in their 20s, not that popular,     and easy to talk to. [02:32] Both     Uh, yes there is! [02:34] Oso     There is, there is, there is, there is! [02:34] Choro     There is, there is, there is, there is! [02:35] Oso     There is, right? [02:36] Choro     There is! [02:38] Choro     There is, right? [02:38] Oso     There is! [02:41] Oso     Totty! [02:41] Choro     Totty! [02:42] Oso     There is, Totty! [02:43] Choro     There is, Totty! [02:45] Both     Totty! [02:49] Todo     What to do... [02:51] Oso     He's not even listening! [02:53] Choro     Hey, Totty? Totty... [02:56] Choro     Uh, Totty... [02:59] Choro     Hey, Todomatsu! [03:02] Choro     Wipe that blank stare out of your eyes! [03:05] Todo     What? [03:06] Choro     You're looking for someone else     to take to the mixer, right? [03:09] Todo     Yeah. [03:09] Oso     What are the requirements? [03:11] Oso     Someone in their 20s, no status,     who's easy to talk to? [03:15] Todo     Yeah. [03:15] Both     There is someone! Right here close to you! [03:18] Totty     Huh? [03:19] Oso     There are a lot! Like, five! [03:21] Todo     That many?! [03:22] Todo     Huh? Who? [03:23] Todo     Who are you talking about? [03:25] Todo     Hey, tell me! [03:27] Choro     Er... [03:28] Choro     It wouldn't be right to tell you. [03:30] Todo     Huh? [03:31] Choro     We want you to think of it yourself. [03:34] Todo     Why? [03:35] Choro     Because we'll die of loneliness otherwise. [03:37] Oso     Yeah. We'll die. [03:39] Todo     What? [03:40] Todo     Who is it? Huh? [03:41] Todo     Seriously, who... Wait... [03:44] Todo     Uh... [03:45] Todo     Who? What? [03:46] Ichi     He seriously doesn't know! How terrifying! [03:49] Oso     Here's a hint. His name is something-matsu. [03:51] Choro     Right. You basically said it,     but I guess it can't be helped now. [03:55] Todo     Something-matsu? [04:01] Todo     Who? [04:02] Choro     Why don't you die?! Seriously, just go die! [04:05] Jyu     Nii-san! [04:08] Todo     What?! [04:09] Todo     You're joking, right? [04:11] Todo     Are you serious? [04:12] Todo     Choose one of you guys to take to the mixer? [04:15] Todo     No way, I can't do that! That's suicide! [04:19] Todo     Um, I don't need any offerings. [04:21] Oso     But it's tomorrow, right? [04:23] Oso     If you don't find someone,     the mixer will be called off, right? [04:28] Kara     Totty. Let's go with a win/win situation. [04:31] Todo     There's no situation where     I'm winning right now. [04:33] Choro     Be honest. Who of us would you pick? [04:35] Todo     None of you! It's like comparing     five pieces of goldfish shit! [04:37] Choro     That comparison doesn't exist! [04:40] Todo     Well, if I had to choose... [04:43] Todo     Jyushimatsu-niisan. [04:44] Three     What?! [04:45] Todo     His hyperactive personality     might be a hit at a mixer. [04:49] Jyu     Totty! [04:50] Todo     There's no way I could take him, though. [04:52] Jyu     Totty?! [04:53] Todo     I mean... [04:55] Todo     He's been hard ever since I mentioned a mixer. [04:58] Jyu     Hardty! SIGN    Todomatsu's Mixer Member Audition [05:03] Todo     All right, guys. [05:05] Todo     We're about to hold the auditions,     so take this seriously. [05:15] Todo     Listen up! [05:17] Todo     I'm going to be frank!     Never hold me back ever again! [05:21] Todo     We sextuplets are the lowest of     the low in the caste system, SIGN    Awesome SIGN    Matsuno     Family [05:24] Todo     and reside in the shitty dark hell caste     of the demon world of darkness. [05:28] Todo     And the only one of us     who has a glimmer of hope [05:31] Todo     at graduating from being a virgin is me. [05:33] Todo     Yet all you do is get in my way! [05:37] Todo     How does it help anything     if scum is jealous of scum? [05:39] Todo     If we don't overcome this obstacle,     we're going to be virgins forever! [05:42] Todo     Let's make a promise. When I'm able to do it, [05:45] Todo     I will come back for you all, [05:47] Todo     and I will pull you up with me. [05:50] Todo     So, let me go first! [05:53] Todo     I'll break the way through to being top tier. [05:56] Todo     I'll pay you all back! [05:58] Four     T-Totty! SIGN    Todomatsu's Mixer Member Audition [06:01] Todo     All right, let's start. [06:03] Todo     Thanks for coming! [06:05] Four     Thanks for having us! [06:07] Todo     First, Ichimatsu-niisan. [06:09] Ichi     Wh-Why me? [06:11] Ichi     You don't have to pick me. I'm not interested. [06:14] Ichi     A mixer? What's that even mean? [06:16] Ichi     How stupid. [06:17] Choro     Do you realize how obvious you're being? [06:20] Kara     All right, here we go.     Mixer audition, ready... go! SIGN    Mixer Audition SIGN    Ichimatsu [06:35] Oso     Uh, Ichimatsu? [06:36] Choro     Ichimatsu, you have to say something. [06:42] Choro     No, no, no. Huh? [06:43] Choro     What are you doing? [06:44] Oso     Talk, Ichimatsu. [06:46] Jyu     Ichimatsu-niisan? [06:47] Kara     You can say anything. [06:49] Choro     Ichimatsu? [06:49] Oso     Ichimatsu. [06:50] Kara     Talk. [06:51] Jyu     Nii-san? [06:52] Oso     Hey. [06:53] Choro     Ichimatsu! [06:58] Kara     Cut! SIGN    Mixer Audition Ichimatsu [06:59] Choro     Wait, what the hell are you doing?!     Why are you taking a dump?! [07:02] Ichi     Well, you guys wouldn't shut up.     I have my own pace! [07:07] Oso     What does that have to do with anything?! [07:09] Oso     Who takes a dump because     hey were thrown off their pace?! SIGN    Todomatsu's Mixer Member Audition [07:11] Todo     Next! [07:13] Oso     This'll be a cinch! Just you watch! SIGN    Mixer Audition SIGN    Osomatsu [07:17] Kara     And, go! [07:20] Oso     Good evening. [07:21] Todo     Good evening. [07:22] Oso     Well, aren't you cute? Yeah-yuh! [07:24] Todo     W-W-Wait! [07:27] Kara     Cut! SIGN    Mixer Audition Osomatsu [07:28] Todo     What the hell are you doing?! [07:30] Oso     Huh? Isn't it okay to do that at mixers? [07:32] Todo     Like hell it is! What kind of idea     do you have about mixers? [07:35] Oso     They'll let me do it if I grovel. [07:37] Choro     This isn't a porno! SIGN    Todomatsu's Mixer Member Audition [07:38] Oso     What? You can't touch them? [07:41] Oso     Then I'm not going. [07:43] Todo     You're trash! Next! [07:45] Todo     Jyushimatsu-niisan, you ready to go yet? [07:49] Jyu     It hasn't gone down yet. SIGN    Todomatsu's Mixer Member Audition [07:51] Todo     Next! [07:53] Kra     I, Karamatsu, shall talk my way into your heart. [07:56] Ichi     Here we go. Damn it, here we go already! SIGN    Mixer Audition SIGN    Shittymatsu [08:01] Kara     Mixers. They are a microcosm of life. [08:04] Kara     A woman and a man meet and talk, [08:06] Kara     while replenishing the liquids     their bodies need most. [08:10] Kara     And then finally, yes... [08:14] Kara     The check. [08:23] Choro     That made no sense. Were you     trying to be cool just now? SIGN    Todomatsu's Mixer Member Audition [08:26] Todo     Next. [08:28] Todo     Jyushimatsu-niisan, can you go? [08:31] Jyu     Not yet. [08:32] Todo     Then, next. [08:33] Todo     That's you, Choromatsu-niisan. [08:36] Choro     Nah, I'll pass. [08:37] Todo     Huh? [08:38] Choro     I thought it over, and mixers     don't interest me that much. [08:41] Choro     And it's not good to be flashy. [08:42] Todo     She'll be there. [08:45] Choro     I want to have a more wholesome meeting... [08:48] Choro     I think that's what true love is. [08:55] Oso     You just sit there and keep rising. [08:57] Todo     Damn Fappymatsu. [08:59] Ichi     Jyushimatsu? [09:00] Jyu     Aw, man. It's just not going down. [09:11] Oso     Uh, Todo.. [09:12] Todo     Quiet. I'm thinking about who to take. SIGN    Takes a dump SIGN    Fast hands SIGN    Boner SIGN    Dialogue makes no sense SIGN    Rising [09:19] Todo     Like I can pick one! [09:21] Todo     Let me be alone. [09:22] Oso     Todomatsu! [09:25] Oso     Sorry about all of this... [09:28] Todo     Yeah. [09:29] Oso     You're pretty unfortunate to     have older brothers like us. [09:33] Todo     Yeah. [09:34] Oso     You probably hate us, huh? [09:35] Todo     Yeah. [09:36] Oso     You look down on us. [09:38] Todo     Yeah. [09:42] Todo     Well, then... [09:42] Choro     U-Um... Please make an impartial decision. [09:46] Todo     Shut up, you idiot! [09:48] Five     T-Totty... SIGN    "The Star of Hope, Todomatsu" [09:55] [SONG] Song     Ah, Totty [09:57] [SONG] Song     Oh, Totty [10:00] [SONG] Song     The bridge to land, [10:03] [SONG] Song     The star of hope [10:05] [SONG] Song     You're the only one we can count on [10:07] [SONG] Song     You're the only one [10:10] [SONG] Song     If you can't do it, we     brothers will be destroyed [10:17] [SONG] Song     Ah, Totty [10:19] [SONG] Song     Oh, Totty [10:22] [SONG] Song     Hurry up and do it [10:30] Todo     Huh?! [10:32] God     Totty. You should be more     honest with yourself. SIGN    The God SIGN    of Mixers [10:35] God     You treat your older brothers like trash, [10:38] God     but deep down, you're just trying to be nice. [10:41] God     But the requirement is to bring one. [10:43] God     Which means, no matter how hard     you try, you cannot take all five. [10:48] God     Yes, at this rate, you will lose your chance, as well. [10:52] God     Now choose. Choose the one. [10:56] God     Deep down, you already know who you want to take. [11:05] Todo     Y-Yes! [11:12] Girl     Hey, Atsushi-kun. You bought a car, right? [11:15] Girl2     I wanna go for a drive. [11:17] Atsu     Sure. Whenever I can get a day off. [11:19] Girl     I get to go first! [11:21] Guy     Today's mixer sure is fun. [11:26] Girl     Hey, Nothingo. [11:28] Todo     Huh? [11:29] Girl     Your name is Nothingo, right? [11:31] Todo     Uh, yes... [11:33] Girl     Get me another lemon sour. [11:35] Todo     Oh. Right. SIGN    End SIGN    Latematsu [11:46] Guy     Hey, you. SIGN    "Final Sheeeh" [11:47] Guy     Don't fall asleep in here. Hey, you! [11:49] Guy     Damn it... Why are you alive? [11:51] Guy     Oh, no! [11:56] Guy     Huh? [11:59] Oso     What'd you say?! [12:01] Oso     You got a problem with that, Choromatsu? [12:03] Choro     Huh? I said something because I do, you idiot. [12:06] Kara     Who're you calling an idiot? [12:07] Choro     I wasn't talking to you. [12:09] Todo     Who are you calling a cute prince? [12:11] Choro     I didn't even say that. [12:13] Ichi     Who are you calling a Scottish Fold? [12:15] Choro     I didn't say that, okay?! [12:16] Jyu     Shut up! Shut up, shut up,     shut up, shut up, shut up! [12:19] Oso     You're louder than any of us, Jyushimatsu! [12:22] All     Yeah! [12:25] All     Wasabi octopus? [12:27] Guy     Be quiet. You're ruining the taste of my sake. [12:31] Oso     The hell did you say, old man? [12:34] Oso     Don't interfere in a fight between brothers! [12:40] Guy     I've got more snacks now. Thanks. [12:42] Guy     That's enough. If I fought with you,     I'd just be picking on the weak. [12:49] Oso     Hey, he just called us weak. [12:51] Ichi     Yeah, he did. [12:53] Todo     What do you want to do? Kill him? [12:55] Jyu     Let's kill him! [12:56] Kara     It's been a while. [12:57] Choro     Hey, old man! Don't underestimate us sextuplets! [13:01] Oso     Kill him! [13:04] Guy     Hup! [13:06] Guy     Hup, hup, hup, hup! [13:17] Guy     See? Now it's just me picking on the weak. [13:20] Ich     The real fight's... [13:21] Ich     ...just about to start. [13:22] Choro     We'll kill you! [13:27] Guy     Good grief. I guess I'll have to use this... [13:40] Oso     Wh-What was that move? Ugh, I'm tired. [13:46] Guy     That is a special move from my     country, called the "Fheeeh." [13:49] Guy     That should teach you a lesson. [13:52] Guy     It seems the one I'm searching     for is not in this country, either. [13:56] Guy     I just wasted my time. [13:58] Iya     It's so noisy... What's all the racket? [14:02] Iya     M-Me shochu! [14:04] Iya     Sheeeh! [14:06] Guy     That's... That pose... [14:09] Iya     Me gyoza! Me stew! [14:11] Iya     Sheeeh! [14:13] Guy     That's the pose of the legendary ultimate     move that surpasses my Fheeeh, [14:16] Guy     the Sheeeh! [14:17] Guy     To think someone exists today who can use it! [14:20] Iya     Those stupid sextuplets... [14:22] Guy     Pardon. [14:23] Guy     Would you happen to be a user of the Sheeeh Fist? [14:27] Iya     Sheeeh Fist? [14:28] Guy     Please don't hide it. [14:31] Iya     What are you talking about? [14:32] Guy     You must have inherited the great Sheeeh Fist. [14:36] Iya     No, me is just Iyami. [14:38] Guy     I'm so honored to meet you. [14:39] Iya     Who are you? [14:42] Guy     Please, Savior! Please use your     strength to save my homeland! [14:48] Iya     U-Um... What are you talking about? [14:53] Guy     My country, Akaatsuka,     is a small country near Tibet. [14:56] Guy     Whoever wins the martial arts tournament held     once every ten years becomes the king. [15:00] Guy     However, the current administration     is connected to a crime organization, [15:04] Guy     and the fall of our country is imminent. [15:06] Guy     So I would like for you, who has     learned the legendary Sheeeh, [15:10] Guy     which no normal person could do, [15:13] Guy     to come win the tournament     and save my country. [15:16] Guy     You'll accept, won't you? [15:18] Iya     Nope! Not happening! [15:20] Iya     That's too much trouble! [15:22] Guy     But if you don't, my country... [15:24] Iya     Let it fall! Me is not interested     in any country other than France. [15:28] Guy     Very well... [15:31] Guy     Then let me explain the     history of the Sheeeh Fist. [15:33] Iya     Why?! [15:34] Guy     Please look over at that monitor. SIGN    The Origins of Sheeeh [15:37] Nar     The Sheeeh Fist, otherwise     known as the Shiei Fist. [15:41] Nar     Its origins are ancient, said to be founded     9,000 years ago near the Yellow River. [15:46] Nar     Its unique kata creates [15:47] Nar     destructive force by taking one's     physical abilities to the limit, [15:50] Nar     and is famous for being     an ultimate fighting move. [15:52] Nar     In ancient times, it was called the Shiya Fist;     in the middle ages, the Shiyu Fist; [15:54] Nar     and in recent times, the Shiei Fist,     and is now handed down as a myth. [16:00] Nar     Quoted from "The Origins of Sheeeh"     by Minmin Books. [16:03] Guy     And that's that. [16:05] Iya     Let me go! Let me go! [16:05] Guy     You have the ability to use the Sheeeh Fist. [16:08] Guy     Train with me, and enter the tournament. [16:11] Iya     Me told you that it has nothing to do with me! [16:12] Guy     But my country... [16:14] Iya     Me told you, just let it fall, then! [16:16] Iya     If you're that obsessed with it, you enter it! [16:18] Girl     He can't! [16:21] Guy     Shaorin. [16:24] Shao     Iyami-san. My father has a     sickness of the heart. So please... [16:29] Iya     Me will enter the tournament. [16:31] Guy     Huh? [16:31] Shao     Really? [16:33] Iya     Of course! Me will use my ultimate     Sheeeh Fist and save your homeland. [16:38] Shao     I-Iyami-san... [16:43] Iya     Me will be taking this cutie as my reward! [16:46] Iya     Our honeymoon will be in France! [16:51] Iya     Sh-Sheeeh! [16:53] Iya     Sheeeh! [16:54] Iya     Sh-Sheeeh! [16:56] Iya     Sheeeh! [17:00] ---     Sheeeh... [17:03] Iya     Sheeeh! [17:06] Iya     Sheh, sheh, sheh, sheh, sheh. [17:10] Iya     Sh-Sheeeh! [17:14] Iya     Sheeeh... [17:20] ---     Sheeeh. [17:21] Iya     Sheeeh on, sheeeh off. [17:23] Iya     Sheeeh on, sheeeh off. [17:24] Iya     Sheh, sheh, sheh, sheh, sheeeh! SIGN    The Day of the Martial Arts Tournament [17:40] Ann     And now, the martial arts     tournament for the right to rule [17:44] Ann     the kingdom of Akaatsuka is about to begin. [17:46] Ann     The first match is between these cards. [17:48] Oso     Choromatsu. [17:49] Choro     Hm? [17:50] Oso     How much did you bet? [17:51] Choro     80 yen. What about you, Ichimatsu? [17:53] Ichi     70 yen. [17:54] Todo     I bet 50 yen. [17:55] Kara     I bet 60 yen. [17:56] Oso     Yeah, I bet 60, too. [17:58] Choro     So... That makes the total 320 yen. [18:02] Oso     This'll be a pretty big wager. [18:04] Ichi     What about you, Jyushimatsu? [18:05] Jyu     Aw, I didn't make it in time to enter. [18:09] Todo     Wait, you were gonna enter? [18:14] Choro     Iyami, if you lose, we'll beat you to a pulp! [18:16] Todo     We'll burn your house down. [18:18] Jyu     Pull in your arms! Watch the ball! [18:20] Guy     It'll be all right. Let us trust     the results of your training. [18:24] Shao     Iyami-san... [18:27] Iya     Trust me. [18:30] Shao     Yeah. [18:31] Ann     And the first match begins! [18:36] Iya     Sorry, but me is here to win.     You're just going to have to lose. [18:50] Iya     Sheeeh! [18:57] Shao     Iyami-san, look out! [19:01] Iya     Huh? Huh?! [19:03] Iya     Sheeeh! [19:07] Iya     Huh? What? [19:08] Iya     Sheeeh! [19:12] Ann     He's being pounded. Is the match over already? [19:15] Guy     I-Impossible! His Sheeeh kata should be perfect. [19:18] Shao     Iyami-san! [19:21] Kara     Hey, what's with that? [19:27] Oso     You idiot! [19:30] Oso     Iyami! What's that half-assed sheeeh?! [19:32] Oso     You trained? Your kata is perfect? [19:34] Oso     You idiot! [19:35] Oso     A sheeeh that only looks perfect     on the outside is pointless! [19:38] Iya     On the outside? [19:40] Oso     Of course it won't be powerful     if you don't put any feeling into it! [19:43] Oso     You need to sheeeh from your belly! [19:45] Oso     Everyone's waiting for you to     sheeeh from the heart! [19:48] Iya     Sheeeh from the heart?     What are you talking about? [19:52] Choro     Okay, leave this to us. Hey, what's this? [19:56] Iya     That's me bank statement! [20:01] Iya     Sheeeh! [20:03] Both     There it is! [20:04] Iya     Damn it, Osomatsu! What are you doing?! [20:06] Choro     No, I'm Choromatsu. [20:08] Todo     Iyami, this too! [20:10] Iya     That's my insurance card! [20:14] Iya     Sheeeh! [20:16] Both     Yes! [20:17] Kara     Iyami, I released a photobook. SIGN    Karamatsu [20:20] Iya     Sheeeh! [20:22] Jyu     Iyami, look! [20:24] Iya     Sheeeh! [20:26] Oso     Iyami, this girl actually has a husband and kids. [20:31] Iya     Sheh, sheh, sheh, sheh! [20:34] Ann     And he's down! Iyami's magnificent     attack has hit its mark! [20:40] Iya     That's enough out of all of you!     What do you have against me?! [20:44] Choro     Whew, it worked. [20:46] Oso     All right! [20:47] Oso     Time for the final blow. Let's go! [20:48] Todo     Uh, but... [20:50] Todo     I don't think I have anything else     to surprise Iyami with. [20:52] Oso     Sheeeh! Seriously?! [20:54] Guy     Screw this sheeeh. I'll kill you! [21:01] Todo     Crap, crap, crap! Hurry and find     something to surprise him! [21:04] Ichi     What about your collection, Totty? [21:06] Totty     Sheeeh! Why did you bring that?! [21:08] Totty     What's the point of surprising me?! [21:09] Oso     Iyami, look! [21:11] Both     We're naked! [21:12] Chro     Sheeeh! Stop! [21:13] Jyu     Boeh! [21:14] Choro     Not "Boeh!" [21:15] Guy     This is the end! [21:20] Six     Our 320 yen! [21:31] Oso     Th-That's... [21:33] Dayon     I made it in time. [21:35] Six     Dayon! [21:42] Iya     Final... [21:44] Iya     Final... [21:47] Iya     Sheeeh! SIGN    Fin SIGN    Next Time on Osomatsu-san [23:39] Oso     Yay! Next week's the final episode! [23:42] Oso     Huh? It's not? [23:43] Oso     There are three more episodes? SIGN    "Kerosene" "Dayon Tribe" [23:44] Oso     I hate fussing over little details like that. [23:48] Oso     Also, I want some yakiniku!