Season 2 - Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid S

E1 - New Dragon, Ilulu! (Please Be Nice to Her Again)

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] Kobayashi
    -
[00:00] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, Miss Kobayashi!
[00:02] Tohru
    I'm the ultimate maid, aren't I?
SIGN    Tohru
SIGN    Maid
[00:05] Kobayashi
    Of course you're not, but what's up?
SIGN    Miss Kobayashi
[00:08] Tohru
    No, I think I am the ultimate maid.
[00:12] Kobayashi
    I told you, you're not.
[00:13] Tohru
    I found this book.
SIGN    Maid Café Open!
SIGN    Welcoming you with the best maids
[00:15] Kobayashi
    Maid café opening?
SIGN    Welcoming you with the best maids
[00:17] Kobayashi
    That's rather close.
[00:18] Tohru
    They say they'll welcome
    you with the best maids!
[00:21] Tohru
    The best maids?!
[00:23] Tohru
    How can they make such
    false claims without me!
[00:28] Kobayashi
    Yeah, no one should make false claims.
[00:31] Kobayashi
    The dragon in front of me
     is doing that right now, though.
SIGN    Actually a Dragon
[00:35] Tohru
    For now, I'll turn them into ash from
    which nothing will grow with my cursed flames.
[00:40] Kobayashi
    Literally burning love?!
[00:44] Kobayashi
    No, you better not do that.
[00:46] Tohru
    Regardless!
[00:46] Tohru
    I'm going to scout out the enemy!
[00:50] Kobayashi
    Is she okay?
[00:53] Tohru
    I'm back home.
[00:55] Kobayashi
    Welcome home.
[00:56] Kobayashi
    How was it?
[00:57] Kobayashi
    You didn't do anything, did you?
[00:59] Tohru
    Somehow, I wound up working there!
[01:01] Kobayashi
    How?!
SIGN    Because I'm
[02:37] Tohru
    I proudly stormed the enemy's evil den.
[02:41] Kobayashi
    Evil den?
[02:42] (Flashback) Tohru
    Pardon me!
[02:43] (Flashback) Maid1
    Oh, my. Are you here to interview for a job?
[02:46] (Flashback) Maid2
    You're awfully motivated,
    wearing a maid outfit already.
[02:49] (Flashback) Maid3
    You're so pretty, too.
[02:51] (Flashback) Owner
    You've conquered me with your zeal.
[02:53] (Flashback) Owner
    You're hired!
[02:54] (Flashback) All
    Yay!
[02:55] Tohru
    So, I returned victorious!
[02:58] Kobayashi
    Is that maid café going to be okay?
[03:00] Tohru
    Well, I have had a lot of free time on my
    hands lately while you and Kanna are gone.
[03:05] Kobayashi
    You're like a wife getting a
    part-time job because she's bored!
[03:07] Kobayashi
    So, you are going to try working, then?
[03:10] Kobayashi
    Will you be okay?
[03:11] Tohru
    What are you talking about?
[03:12] Tohru
    I work as a maid every day.
[03:15] Tohru
    I'm used to it!
[03:17] Kobayashi
    No.
[03:17] Kobayashi
    Tohru, I may work at a company now,
[03:21] Kobayashi
    but when I lived with my parents
    I worked at a restaurant.
[03:24] Kobayashi
    So, listen.
[03:25] Kobayashi
    You shouldn't underestimate
    the service industry.
[03:27] Tohru
    M-Miss Kobayashi?!
[03:28] Kobayashi
    The cosplay maids at maid cafés
    go against my personal principles,
[03:32] Kobayashi
    but their spirit of service
    is worthy of respect.
[03:36] Kobayashi
    This is a good opportunity, Tohru.
[03:38] Kobayashi
    You should go learn about
    the service industry.
[03:40] Tohru
    You're making me kind of scared now.
SIGN    Several Days Later...
[03:43] Kobayashi
    Well,
[03:44] Kobayashi
    it's been some time since then,
[03:46] Kobayashi
    so I wonder if Tohru is
    doing a good job at work.
SIGN    Kanna Kamui (Actually a Dragon)
[03:48] Kanna
    Kobayashi, you're a worrywart.
[03:51] Kobayashi
    Is this it?
[03:52] Maid4
    Welcome home, Master.
[03:55] Kobayashi
    Oh!
[03:56] Maid4
    And young lady.
[03:57] Kanna
    Oh!
[03:58] Kanna
    There're so many people like Lady Tohru!
[04:01] Kobayashi
    Looks like this maid café
    went with plain style maids.
[04:06] Kobayashi
    People don't use the word
    moe very much anymore,
[04:09] Kobayashi
    but they've kept the spirit of those times.
[04:12] Kobayashi
    Now, the menu...
[04:13] Kobayashi
    Yeah!
[04:14] Kobayashi
    This is also true to those roots.
[04:16] Kobayashi
    There's a special service
    with every menu item.
[04:19] Kobayashi
    I'm betting the magic chants like
    "Turn delicious, moemoe kyun"
[04:21] Kobayashi
    are different for each one.
[04:23] Kanna
    You know a lot, Kobayashi.
[04:25] Kobayashi
    Just between you and me,
[04:28] Kobayashi
    long ago I tried to work
    in a café like this.
[04:32] Kobayashi
    It didn't work.
[04:33] Kobayashi
    It didn't work out.
[04:34] Kanna
    I don't get it, but poor you.
[04:37] Kobayashi
    More importantly, where's Tohru?
[04:38] Kanna
    Back there.
[04:47] Tohru
    Table 10, order's up!
[04:48] Maid2
    On it!
[04:49] Tohru
    I'm running low on plates,
    so lay them out, lay them out!
[04:51] Maid2
    Right away!
[05:03] Maid1
    That's incredible skill!
[05:04] Maid1
    Way to go, Head Chef!
[05:06] Maid2
    You're really a huge help, Head Chef!
[05:08] Maid3
    Head Chef Tohru-sama!
[05:09] Tohru
    No, no, it's thanks to you
    all working efficiently...
[05:14] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi!
[05:16] Tohru
    You came to see me?!
[05:17] Kobayashi
    You're doing a splendid job.
[05:19] Kobayashi
    I'm surprised.
[05:21] Tohru
    You see that?
[05:22] Tohru
    It's easy for me to handle!
[05:25] Tohru
    I've taken another step forward as a maid...
[05:27] Tohru
    As a maid...
[05:30] Tohru
    I'm not working as a maid at all!
[05:33] Kobayashi
    Yeah, you're the chef.
[05:34] Tohru
    Hold on, I'll go ask someone
    on the floor to swap with me!
[05:36] Kobayashi
    No, I think they put you
    in the right position.
[05:39] Tohru
    No, it's the right position
    for a volcanic dragon!
[05:43] Tohru
    Please go out and come back in again!
[05:45] Kobayashi
    Eh?
[05:46] Maid4
    Turn delicious.
[05:48] Kanna
    It's good.
[05:49] Tohru
    Welcome, Miss Kobayashi!
[05:52] Kobayashi
    Tch, it's supposed to be Master!
[05:54] Maid1
    When Head Chef first started
    on the floor she said,
[05:57] Maid1
    "I refuse to call anyone but
    Miss Kobayashi 'Master'!"
[06:00] Kobayashi
    Wait, she doesn't even
    call me Master, though.
[06:03] Tohru
    Please have a seat over here!
[06:05] Kobayashi
    Now I can finally order.
[06:09] Kanna
    Omelet rice! Omelet rice!
[06:11] Kobayashi
    Okay, two omelet rices.
[06:13] Tohru
    Yes, coming right up!
[06:17] Tohru
    Now I'll cast a spell to make it delicious!
[06:20] Kobayashi
    Be cute about it.
[06:21] Tohru
    Of course!
[06:23] Tohru
    I call upon the Shadow King
    that rules over this world,
[06:26] Tohru
    make this the greatest it can
    be with these dark arts!
[06:29] Tohru
    I beseech thee for abundance
    and quality worth praise!
[06:32] Tohru
    Change its value and bring forth
    another monument to your glory!
[06:35] Tohru
    Let my magic spread like
    mud and bring corruption,
[06:38] Tohru
    let my principles erode the world
    and bring a deluge of madness!
[06:41] Tohru
    Replace the genuine with falsehood!
[06:46] Tohru
    Turn delicious, moemoe kyun!
[06:54] Tohru
    Okay, now it's delicious.
[06:56] Tohru
    Please eat up.
[06:58] Kobayashi
    That was actual magic! A curse, in fact!
[07:00] Kanna
    It's good.
[07:01] Kobayashi
    Bring me the Head Chef!
[07:03] Tohru
    Hello!
[07:04] Tohru
    I'm the Head Chef, Maid, and Dragon, Tohru!
[07:13] Tohru
    She has the skills, at least.
    Only the skills.
[07:16] Tohru
    Though, I really don't want to be anyone
     but Miss Kobayashi's maid, so I'm quitting.
[07:22] Maids
    You can't!
[07:23] Tohru
    Huh?
[07:23] Maid1
    You can't do that!
[07:25] Maid2
    Our café's already famous for the
    taste of your food, Head Chef!
[07:29] Maid3
    There are so many posts spreading about it
    through word of mouth on the net!
[07:32] Maid2
    Head Chef!
[07:32] Maid3
    Head Chef!
[07:33] Maid1
    Head Chef!
[07:35] Tohru
    Uhh, then...
[07:37] Tohru
    I'll teach you the magic chant
    to make food delicious.
[07:41] Tohru
    Listen closely.
[07:42] Tohru
    For a human to do it, you'll have
    to draw this magic circle first...
[07:49] Maid4
    Welcome home, Master.
[07:51] Takiya
    Oh, this is a nice café.
[07:54] Takiya
    Okay, we'll take two omelet rices.
[07:56] Maid4
    Coming right up.
[07:57] Maid4
    Now I'll cast a spell to make it delicious!
[08:01] Maid4
    I call upon the Shadow King
    that rules over this world,
[08:04] Maid4
    make this the greatest it
    can be with these dark arts!
SIGN    Takiya Makoto
[08:05] Takiya
    This is an awfully unique maid café!
[08:07] Maid 4
    I beseech you for abundance and quality!
SIGN    Eatery Reviews
SIGN    Ate Bookmarked
SIGN    Closest Station: Oborozuka Station
SIGN    Cost: 650+ yen Closed On: -
SIGN    The Head Chef's Cooking Was Really Delicious.
SIGN    I underestimated it because it was a maid café. I thought the food came
     second as long as I could enjoy the girls. However... Read More
SIGN    Deliciousness You Can't Taste Elsewhere
SIGN    I had my own biases, but the food was surprisingly good, and I never thought... Read More
SIGN    The Head Chef's Cooking Was Really Delicious.
SIGN    I underestimated it because it was a maid café. I thought the food came second as long as I could enjoy the girls.
SIGN    However, their most popular dish, the omelet rice, tasted better than any other restaurant's omelet rice.
SIGN    Too Delicious for a Maid Café! Practically—
SIGN    Omelet Rice Was Superb!
SIGN    food was delicious!
SIGN    omelet rice
[08:24] Tohru
    As a maid, not a chef!
[08:26] Tohru
    Where are the reviews about me as a maid?!
[08:29] Kobayashi
    Don't break my mouse, okay?
SIGN    Episode 1
SIGN    New Dragon, Ilulu! (Please Be Nice to Her Again)
[08:38] Announcer
    We predict sudden changes
    in the weather patterns,
[08:40] Kobayashi
    Ahhn.
[08:40] Announcer
    so please pay attention
    to future weather reports.
SIGN    Early This Morning Unexplained Landslide
SIGN    Landslide, No One Injured
[08:44] Announcer
    Next up is the news.
[08:46] Announcer
    Early this morning there
    was a large-scale landslide.
[08:50] Announcer
    It looks like the earth was sliced away,
[08:52] Kobayashi
    That's where I met you, Tohru.
[08:52] Announcer
    and there are many unexplained aspects,
[08:55] Announcer
    so the local government advises
    people to stay away from the scene.
[08:56] Tohru
    How could they do that to our precious spot!
[08:59] Announcer
    The city has already
    requested an investigation
[08:59] Tohru
    I'll find the culprit and send them
     to Gehenna, then Jahannam,
[09:01] Announcer
    and aid for restoration from the
    prefecture and national government.
[09:02] Tohru
    and finally feed them to Amam!
[09:04] Announcer
    An emergency meeting has been called
    between local, prefectural, and national officials—
[09:04] Kobayashi
    But the only ones who could
    do something like that are...
SIGN    Fafnir (Actually a Dragon)
[09:08] Fafnir
    I was reviewing the calls and responses
    for a game event at that time.
SIGN    Magatsuchi Shouta
[09:13] Shouta
    Lucoa's been out of the
    country since yesterday.
[09:16] Shouta
    We're bound by... by my magic power,
[09:19] Shouta
    so I can tell where she is.
SIGN    Elma (Actually a Dragon)
[09:22] Elma
    Taiyaki! It's so good!
[09:29] Elma
    What are you doing here
    out of the blue, Tohru?!
[09:31] Tohru
    You're the culprit!
[09:32] Elma
    What are you talking about?!
[09:33] Kobayashi
    On today's news there was a mountain that...
[09:37] Elma
    Oh, yeah. I was curious about that, too!
[09:41] Kobayashi
    It wasn't you either?
[09:42] Elma
    I just assumed Tohru had done that.
[09:44] Tohru
    No, I didn't!
[09:45] Kobayashi
    Hold on.
[09:46] Kobayashi
    Then, that means it was some dragon
    other than the ones we know?
[09:49] Tohru
    There aren't that many who
    could break my barrier.
[09:52] Kobayashi
    Then... who?
[09:54] Ilulu
    Me.
SIGN    Ilulu
[10:04] Ilulu
    Good afternoon.
[10:07] Tohru
    Ilulu.
[10:12] Ilulu
    What a pretty city.
[10:15] Ilulu
    People laughing.
[10:18] Ilulu
    With so many here, you could enjoy
    all the destruction you wanted.
[10:22] Ilulu
    Yet here you are, a chaos dragon
     laughing with humans.
[10:25] Ilulu
    I was watching because
    I was a little curious,
[10:28] Ilulu
    but now I'm sick of it. So forget it.
[10:30] Ilulu
    Long and short,
[10:32] Ilulu
    you're an enemy!
[10:37] Tohru
    Tch!
[10:41] Kobayashi
    Who is that?
[10:42] Elma
    Ilulu.
[10:43] Elma
    She's with the most radical
    wing of the chaos faction.
[10:45] Elma
    She just plain loves destruction.
[10:47] Elma
    I'm sure she followed Tohru here.
SIGN    Also followed Tohru here
[10:50] Elma
    See, what did I just tell you?
[10:51] Elma
    She's planning to destroy this world.
[10:54] Kobayashi
    Well, still...
[10:55] Kobayashi
    Tohru will do something about her.
[10:57] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi, Ilulu's might
    is only slightly below Tohru's.
[11:00] Elma
    If the two of them fight,
    they'll destroy this whole region.
[11:03] Kobayashi
    She'll do something about that, too.
[11:05] Elma
    You believe in Tohru?
[11:07] Kobayashi
    Well,
[11:08] Kobayashi
    that's really
[11:10] Kobayashi
    all I can do.
[11:11] Kobayashi
    So, I'll just do that.
[11:15] Tohru
    Destruction isn't allowed in this world.
[11:18] Ilulu
    What are you saying?
[11:19] Ilulu
    I'm with the chaos faction.
[11:21] Tohru
    If you can't abide by that,
    I'll blast you back to whence you came.
[11:24] Ilulu
    I'm more than happy to fight.
[11:27] Ilulu
    Attacks like that won't affect me.
[11:38] Tohru
    Oh, no! The city!
[11:45] Tohru
    Hot!
[11:48] Tohru
    Ow!
[11:49] Kobayashi
    Uhh, is she struggling?
[11:51] Elma
    Tohru is trying to protect
    the city while fighting.
[11:54] Elma
    She's at a disadvantage.
[11:56] Kobayashi
    You're not going to help her?
[11:58] Elma
    Me?
[12:00] Elma
    I'm with the harmony faction.
[12:02] Elma
    Normally, Tohru and I would be enemies.
[12:03] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[12:04] Elma
    I have put up a barrier to keep humans away,
[12:06] Elma
    but that's just to avoid trouble.
[12:08] Kobayashi
    What about the other dragons?
[12:10] Elma
    Sir Fafnir would tell her
    to clean up her own mess.
[12:14] Elma
    Lady Lucoa is with the spectator faction,
     so she won't intervene.
[12:17] Elma
    Kanna wouldn't be strong enough.
[12:20] Elma
    If she defeats Tohru,
     then I'll fight, as well.
[12:23] Elma
    I'll try to protect both you and this city.
[12:25] Kobayashi
    But then, Tohru would be...
[12:32] Kobayashi
    Even if I believe in her,
[12:34] Kobayashi
    if that doesn't give her strength,
    it's no different than doing nothing.
[12:39] Kobayashi
    But that's all I can—
[12:42] Kobayashi
    Elma!
[12:44] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi, if you're asking
    me to aid Tohru, I can't.
[12:48] Kobayashi
    Pudding!
[12:48] Elma
    Wait! You can't just buy me off with...
[12:51] Kobayashi
    Cream puffs!
[12:52] Kobayashi
    Coffee jelly!
[12:54] Kobayashi
    Chocolate cake!
[12:55] Kobayashi
    Maple syrup pancakes!
[12:57] Kobayashi
    All the sweets you can eat!
[13:14] Tohru
    Ow.
[13:18] Ilulu
    I hit you with thirty shots of flaming acid.
[13:21] Ilulu
    I landed several good
    blows with my claws, too.
[13:25] Ilulu
    And all that earns is an ow?
[13:26] Ilulu
    Well, I'm stumped.
[13:28] Ilulu
    I can't think of a way to kill you.
[13:30] Tohru
    Me, neither.
[13:32] Tohru
    If I attack you all-out,
    the city will be destroyed.
[13:35] Tohru
    But I can't defeat you otherwise.
[13:38] Tohru
    Your attacks are starting
    to get irritating, too!
[13:41] Tohru
    But I have to protect the city!
[13:44] Tohru
    I'm ready to explode
[13:46] Tohru
    and take everything with me.
[13:48] Ilulu
    You're bluffing.
[13:51] Kobayashi
    Tohru!
[13:52] Kobayashi
    Elma's put up a barrier!
[13:55] Elma
    Only because Miss Kobayashi
    made a deal with me!
[14:00] Ilulu
    So, what?
[14:03] Ilulu
    That's disgusting,
    acting all friendly with humans.
[14:06] Ilulu
    We're just getting started!
[14:08] Ilulu
    Now to destroy this world with my true form!
[14:33] Tohru
    That was a close call.
[14:36] Tohru
    I didn't take that much damage,
[14:39] Tohru
    but I nearly forgot I had
    to protect the city, too.
[14:43] Tohru
    For a moment I almost thought I could
    just let everyone but Miss Kobayashi die.
[14:48] Tohru
    But then I wouldn't be able
    to stay in this world.
[14:54] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, umm...
[15:10] Kobayashi
    Shall we go home?
[15:14] Tohru
    Yes.
[15:19] Tohru
    I can try as hard as I must.
[15:21] Tohru
    If it means staying with Miss Kobayashi,
[15:24] Tohru
    I can break any obstacles
    that stand in my way.
[15:36] Ilulu
    That human...
[15:38] Ilulu
    She got Elma to act and saved Tohru.
[15:42] Ilulu
    Humans are our enemies.
[15:44] Ilulu
    That's what we were taught, but...
[15:48] Ilulu
    I want to know...
[15:50] Ilulu
    about that human...
SIGN    Quetzalcoatl (Actually a Dragon)
[15:57] Lucoa
    Huh? Me? Me who?
[16:00] Lucoa
    Oh, yeah.
[16:03] Lucoa
    A cold? Hmm.
[16:05] Lucoa
    The train?
[16:06] Lucoa
    Your bag? Yeah.
[16:11] Lucoa
    Compensation?
[16:12] Lucoa
    By today?
[16:13] Lucoa
    Two million?
[16:20] Lucoa
    Oh, that's terrible.
[16:34] Ilulu
    It was hard enough getting the gate open.
[16:37] Ilulu
    I'm surprised Tohru so easily pulls
    off something that draining.
[16:43] Kobayashi
    The last train, huh?
[16:45] Kobayashi
    I guess I could have Tohru come pick me up.
[16:49] Kobayashi
    You.
[16:50] Ilulu
    The human called Kobayashi.
[16:52] Ilulu
    Why are you living with a dragon?
[16:55] Kobayashi
    Because Tohru chose to fit my lifestyle,
    not because I did anything.
[17:00] Ilulu
    Aren't you afraid?
[17:02] Tohru
    Fear me!
[17:03] Kobayashi
    Well, not when she's that cute.
[17:07] Ilulu
    So...
[17:10] Ilulu
    She makes you horny?
[17:11] Street
    Stop
[17:11] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[17:12] Ilulu
    You're in love with Tohru's human form.
[17:15] Ilulu
    That's why you're fine?
[17:16] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[17:18] Kobayashi
    No, no, what are you talking about?
[17:20] Ilulu
    A strong denial.
[17:22] Ilulu
    Suspicious.
[17:22] Kobayashi
    That's not it!
[17:24] Ilulu
    Then...
[17:29] Kobayashi
    What is this? Wow...
[17:32] Ilulu
    Well?
[17:33] Ilulu
    You're only human in the end.
[17:35] Ilulu
    You can't resist your desires.
[17:37] Ilulu
    Now, let your pitiful
    male instincts run free!
[17:41] Ilulu
    You want to be loved, right?
[17:43] Ilulu
    Tonight you can unleash your lusts on me.
[17:45] Ilulu
    Go on.
[17:46] Ilulu
    Go on, go on.
[17:48] Kobayashi
    I'm a woman!
[17:49] Ilulu
    Ow!
[17:51] Kobayashi
    Cut the crap!
[17:52] Kobayashi
    I'll unleash flames of rage and resentment
    on those huge lumps of fat every day!
[17:58] Kobayashi
    Ahh, the last train's about to leave!
SIGN    Tatsunokuchi Station
[18:00] Ilulu
    Ah, wait!
[18:03] Announcer
    Please do not rush onto the
    train while doors are closing.
[18:17] Kobayashi
    What?
[18:18] Kobayashi
    Haven't caused enough commotion?
[18:23] Ilulu
    I can't accept you.
[18:25] Ilulu
    Humans and dragons can't coexist.
[18:30] Ilulu
    When they're together
     their differences cause suffering,
[18:32] Ilulu
    and as that suffering continues
    it breeds hatred for others.
[18:35] Ilulu
    Respect turns to envy
[18:37] Ilulu
    and eventually creates pain.
[18:41] Ilulu
    What Tohru feels for you is
    nothing more than curiosity.
[18:46] Ilulu
    When that finally runs out...
[18:50] Ilulu
    Don't sleep!
[18:52] Kobayashi
    Oh, it's fine.
[18:54] Kobayashi
    I was listening, I was listening.
[18:55] Ilulu
    Liar!
[18:56] Kobayashi
    You were talking about the differences
    between species or something, right?
[19:00] Kobayashi
    You said you can't accept me, right?
[19:02] Kobayashi
    So, is there something you want a
    human like me to do to satisfy you?
[19:06] Ilulu
    Correct your understanding!
[19:11] Kobayashi
    I'll borrow your own words
     to say my piece, then.
[19:16] Kobayashi
    When we enjoy our differences
[19:17] Kobayashi
    and that enjoyment continues,
    it breeds love for others.
[19:20] Kobayashi
    Respect is joined by trust
[19:22] Kobayashi
    and eventually creates bonds.
[19:25] Kobayashi
    I would say that's what I
    feel in my life with Tohru.
[19:29] Ilulu
    That's just a convenient interpretation!
[19:31] Ilulu
    There are still tragedies, too!
[19:32] Ilulu
    You're just glossing over
    it with pretty words!
[19:36] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[19:38] Kobayashi
    We do fight and hurt each other,
[19:41] Kobayashi
    but I turn a blind eye to that
[19:43] Kobayashi
    and I don't care if it gets
    buried under something ugly.
[19:46] Kobayashi
    Even if I don't properly
    understand her feelings,
[19:49] Kobayashi
    I've done what I can to respond to them,
[19:51] Kobayashi
    and we manage.
[19:52] Kobayashi
    That's the kind of person I am.
[19:54] Ilulu
    Is that how you humans think?
[19:57] Kobayashi
    No. It's how I, Kobayashi, think.
[20:01] Kobayashi
    Don't you distinguish between
    how you and other dragons think?
[20:06] Ilulu
    There's no need to.
[20:08] Ilulu
    They're the same.
[20:09] Kobayashi
    Really?
[20:11] Kobayashi
    But the dragon who came up with
    what dragons should think
[20:15] Kobayashi
    wasn't you, was it?
[20:36] Ilulu
    You can spout your pretty words,
    but you're still a human.
[20:39] Ilulu
    It didn't work because you're a woman.
SIGN    Oborozuka
[20:48] Kobayashi
    Whoa.
[20:52] Kobayashi
    I guess Ilulu left?
[20:55] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[21:04] Kobayashi
    What is this?
SIGN    To be continued next episode!
[21:13] Fafnir
    Hmm?
SIGN    Unable to log in.
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[21:42] ---
    Oh?
[21:43] Takiya
    Faf-kun?
[21:46] Takiya
    The fate of mankind
[21:48] Takiya
    is in jeopardy!
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:22] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, it's started again!
[23:25] Tohru
    The story of the love between you and me!
[23:28] Kobayashi
    There was a new dragon, though?
[23:30] Tohru
    She won't appear anymore.
[23:31] Kobayashi
    That's not true.
SIGN    Episode 2
SIGN    Hot Guy Kobayashi! (In Many Ways)
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Leo
SIGN    Wicked
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    Eat delicious food at home and sleep.
SIGN    That's just what you want to do, Kanna-chan.
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Leo.

E2 - Hot Guy Kobayashi! (In Many Ways)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] (Flashback) Dragon1
    Ilulu.
[00:03] (Flashback) Dragon1
    Ilulu.
[00:05] (Flashback) Dragon1
    Were you playing with humans again?
[00:07] (Flashback) Ilulu
    Yeah.
[00:08] (Flashback) Ilulu
    Humans are nice, so I love them!
[00:11] (Flashback) Dragon1
    I see.
[00:12] (Flashback) Dragon1
    Perhaps it is time we
    consider coexisting, then.
[00:17] (Flashback) Dragon2
    Bad news!
[00:18] (Flashback) Dragon2
    The humans are attacking the dragon village!
[00:21] (Flashback) Dragon3
    This always happens when we stay quiet.
[00:26] (Flashback) Dragon3
    Damn humans!
[00:27] (Flashback) Dragon3
    They will pay!
[00:29] (Flashback) Ilulu
    Where's Mom and Dad?
[00:31] (Flashback) Dragon2
    I'm sorry, dear.
[00:33] (Flashback) Ilulu
    Does this mean I can't
    play with humans anymore?
[00:35] (Flashback) Dragon2
    Of course it does!
[00:37] (Flashback) Dragon2
    The humans are the ones who
    took your parents from you!
[00:41] (Flashback) Dragon3
    Humans are our enemy!
[00:43] (Flashback) Dragon3
    There will never be
    understanding between us!
[02:22] Kobayashi
    Good.
[02:23] Kobayashi
    Everyone's asleep.
[02:27] Kobayashi
    I can't believe the first one I'd see aside
    from my father's would be my own...
[02:35] Tohru
    Oh, welcome home, Miss Kobayashi.
[02:38] Tohru
    Jeez, please say something
    if you're going to be late.
[02:41] Kobayashi
    Oh, yeah. Sorry.
[02:43] Tohru
    What's the matter, Miss Kobayashi?
[02:45] Tohru
    Your face is bright red.
[02:47] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[02:48] Tohru
    Do you have a cold?
[02:50] Kobayashi
    I-I'm fine!
[02:53] Kobayashi
    Huh? Why?!
[02:55] Kobayashi
    Why is my heart racing because
    Tohru looks like this?!
[02:57] Kobayashi
    Does this mean I'm lusting after Tohru?
[03:01] Kobayashi
    Just put your clothes on.
[03:03] Tohru
    Okay.
[03:07] Ilulu
    Kobayashi,
[03:08] Ilulu
    now that you've become a man,
[03:10] Ilulu
    you'll show your true colors in no time!
[03:13] Ilulu
    Now, show me!
[03:15] Ilulu
    Show me how shallow humans are!
[03:17] Kobayashi
    I bet that's what she's thinking.
[03:20] Kobayashi
    I'm betting Ilulu used magic
    to turn me into a guy.
[03:23] Kobayashi
    I just hope I go back to normal with time.
[03:29] Kobayashi
    I don't know what Ilulu
    hopes to get out of me,
[03:33] Kobayashi
    but I need to keep a clear head.
[03:48] Kobayashi
    K-Kanna-chan?!
[03:51] Kanna
    Good morning, Kobayashi.
[03:54] Kobayashi
    What's wrong?
[03:55] Kanna
    I thought you'd be cold in the morning.
[03:58] Kobayashi
    I-I'm awake already, okay?
[04:05] Kobayashi
    At this point, I have no
    idea what might happen.
[04:10] Kobayashi
    I'll need to keep some
    distance from the others.
[04:13] Kobayashi
    I wonder if Tohru could fix this.
[04:15] Tohru
    Huh?! Miss Kobayashi's become a male?!
[04:18] Tohru
    Let's do it, then!
[04:19] Tohru
    Let's get on with preserving our species!
[04:22] Kobayashi
    That's dangerous.
[04:24] TVMan
    Okay, let's ride the canoe to adventure!
[04:26] Kobayashi
    What are you watching?
[04:27] TVMan
    Everyone watching at home
    come along with us, too!
[04:27] Kanna
    Clinky Clang.
[04:29] Kanna
    Oh!
[04:31] TVMan
    Are you all ready?
[04:33] TVMan
    Let's go!
[04:33] Kids
    Go!
[04:35] Both
    Oh!
[04:35] Kobayashi
    Oh?
[04:36] TVMan
    Now, paddle, paddle!
[04:38] Both
    Yeah!
[04:40] TVMan
    It's a waterfall! Everyone, huddle up!
[04:46] Kobayashi
    This is normal between women.
[04:49] Kobayashi
    I-I can take it.
[04:50] Kobayashi
    I won't be controlled by
    some crazy instincts.
[04:54] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi!
[04:56] Kobayashi
    Don't hug me for no reason!
[04:58] Kanna
    Kobayashi!
[04:59] Kobayashi
    Don't frolic on me!
[05:01] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi!
[05:03] Kobayashi
    I said, don't hug me for no reason!
[05:04] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi!
[05:05] Kobayashi
    No!
[05:14] Kobayashi
    Was her contact always this intense?
[05:19] Kobayashi
    Phew.
[05:20] Kobayashi
    Thank goodness, it's gotten smaller.
[05:24] Kobayashi
    I knew Ilulu had to be weakened
    after her battle with Tohru.
[05:30] Kobayashi
    The factions of dragons
    from Tohru's world...
[05:33] Kobayashi
    The chaos faction, right?
[05:35] Kobayashi
    They hate humans and teach
    their children the same.
[05:40] Kobayashi
    Ilulu was raised that way,
[05:42] Kobayashi
    so she lives that way
[05:46] Kobayashi
    and thinks like that, too.
[05:51] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi! Miss Kobayashi!
[05:54] Tohru
    Kanna's asleep, so how
    about some evening liquor?
[05:58] Kobayashi
    Mmm.
[06:04] Kobayashi
    It's good.
[06:06] Kobayashi
    I'm done thinking about it today.
[06:11] Kobayashi
    Huh? This happened before, too.
[06:14] Kobayashi
    The love potion?!
[06:18] Tohru
    I noticed partway through.
[06:21] Tohru
    Right now, you...
[06:23] Tohru
    have one of those!
[06:25] Tohru
    Ilulu must have gotten to you, huh?
[06:28] Tohru
    Poor Miss Kobayashi.
[06:31] Tohru
    I'll fix you right up.
[06:32] Tohru
    But before that!
[06:33] Tohru
    I'll seize my opportunity!
[06:36] Tohru
    Now that our hearts are united,
    that just leaves our bodies.
[06:41] Tohru
    Now, Miss Kobayashi, give it all to me.
[06:45] Tohru
    Why are you completely turned off?!
[06:47] Kobayashi
    You took off your maid outfit.
[06:48] Kobayashi
    How could you?
[06:49] Tohru
    Huh?
[06:50] Kobayashi
    Tohru, I'm going to tell you all
    the things that make a maid great
[06:54] Kobayashi
    from the male perspective.
[07:00] Kobayashi
    Good.
[07:05] Kobayashi
    I made it through that.
[07:07] Kobayashi
    What will you do next, Ilulu?
[07:19] Georgie
    It's displayed nicely, Miss.
[07:23] Saikawa
    Something's not right, though.
[07:27] Saikawa
    That does it!
[07:29] Georgie
    I see!
SIGN    Episode 2
SIGN    Hot Guy Kobayashi! (In Many Ways)
[07:43] Cremene
    Stop. Don't run.
[07:49] Ilulu
    You followed me here, harmony bastard?!
[07:52] Cremene
    I'm Cremene of the dragon-slaying camp.
[07:55] Cremene
    Give my name to the judge in
    the underworld after you die.
[07:58] Cremene
    I want the credit.
[08:03] Kobayashi
    Now...
[08:05] Kobayashi
    Ilulu always appears when I'm alone,
[08:09] Kobayashi
    so maybe I can see her if I wait here?
[08:12] Kobayashi
    I wonder why I'm
[08:14] Kobayashi
    focusing on Ilulu so much?
[08:18] Kobayashi
    Maybe it's because I feel
    like we could get along?
[08:23] Kobayashi
    All the others I've met from another world
[08:25] Kobayashi
    have been friendly.
[08:28] Kobayashi
    They all have this air of having lived
    through conflict and its resulting tragedy,
[08:33] Kobayashi
    yet they're still able
    to interact with people
[08:36] Kobayashi
    because they know that's not everything.
[08:38] Kobayashi
    Because they're willing to believe
    there's more than just strife.
[08:42] Kobayashi
    That's the Tohru I believe in.
[08:46] Kobayashi
    Which is why I want her to reconcile
[08:49] Kobayashi
    with Ilulu.
[08:53] Kobayashi
    Ilulu's not showing up.
[08:56] Kobayashi
    Maybe she's over here,
     where there's less foot traffic?
[09:05] Kobayashi
    Ilulu?!
[09:07] Kobayashi
    You're injured?
[09:09] Cremene
    You've seen us?
[09:12] Cremene
    Human of this world, I have come to destroy
    that vile beast from another world.
[09:19] Cremene
    Leave here at once,
[09:21] Cremene
    and forget you were ever here.
[09:25] Kobayashi
    Who is this guy?
[09:27] Kobayashi
    Do you mean you're here to kill Ilulu?
[09:29] Kobayashi
    You're saying you're an adult
    that's trying to kill a child?
[09:32] Cremene
    I am.
[09:33] Cremene
    That creature is chaos.
[09:36] Cremene
    An evil dragon that will bring
    naught but harm to humans.
[09:39] Kobayashi
    In that case...
[09:47] Cremene
    What is that unpleasant blare?!
[09:50] Neighbor
    Hey! Keep it down!
[09:51] Kobayashi
    All right!
[09:54] Kobayashi
    Security Buzzer Power!
[10:00] Kobayashi
    You're damn heavy!
[10:02] Cremene
    They ran away?
[10:05] Cremene
    Why would a human...?
[10:11] Kobayashi
    Oh, coming to?
[10:15] Kobayashi
    You okay?
[10:16] Kobayashi
    It looks like your wound
    healed up right away, though.
[10:20] Ilulu
    Why did you save me?
[10:22] Kobayashi
    Can we say we're safe yet?
[10:25] Kobayashi
    I'm sure that guy's still after you, right?
[10:28] Ilulu
    It doesn't matter.
[10:30] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[10:31] Ilulu
    If I'm defeated in battle,
    then that's just my fate.
[10:35] Kobayashi
    Wouldn't me saving you be fate, too, then?
[10:42] Kobayashi
    Hey, Ilulu.
[10:43] Kobayashi
    Is there something you want to tell me?
[10:46] Kobayashi
    The way you mess with me
[10:48] Kobayashi
    kind of suggests there is.
[10:50] Ilulu
    I...
[10:51] Ilulu
    can't accept dragons coexisting with humans.
[10:55] Ilulu
    There's no way they can
    get along with humans.
[10:57] Kobayashi
    You told me that before.
[11:00] Ilulu
    Because if they can get along...
[11:04] Ilulu
    then why did I spend all this time...
[11:10] (Flashback) Dragon3
    Dragons are superior beings,
    so associating with humans is shameful.
[11:14] Ilulu
    I really...
[11:15] (Flashback) Dragon4
    There were all kinds of tragedies.
[11:18] (Flashback) Dragon4
    Harmony is impossible.
[11:19] Ilulu
    I really, well...
[11:21] (Flashback) Dragon3
    Humans are our enemy!
[11:22] Ilulu
    I wanted...
[11:23] Ilulu
    I wanted to...
[11:29] Ilulu
    I really...
[11:32] Ilulu
    wanted to play with them more!
[11:41] Ilulu
    No one would let me.
[11:43] Ilulu
    That girl and that boy did
    nothing wrong, and yet...
[11:51] Kobayashi
    I see.
[11:53] Kobayashi
    Then, hey,
[11:57] Kobayashi
    let's play together next time.
[12:02] Kobayashi
    We do all kinds of things, you know.
[12:05] Kobayashi
    We play dodgeball, go to Comiket,
    go to hot springs, and so on.
[12:09] Kobayashi
    Though, you'll have to lay off the kind
    of play that turns into battles.
[12:13] Ilulu
    Y-You're trying to trick me!
[12:16] Ilulu
    You're trying to win me over
    by saying nice things!
[12:19] Kobayashi
    Yeah, I am.
[12:20] Ilulu
    Huh?
[12:21] Kobayashi
    I'm trying to tame a fierce,
    evil dragon of chaos
[12:24] Kobayashi
    with sweet words to render her harmless.
[12:28] Kobayashi
    Will you believe what you've been taught?
[12:30] Kobayashi
    Or would you care to be tricked by me?
[12:44] Ilulu
    I...
[12:45] Cremene
    That's enough.
[12:47] Cremene
    I can't believe you and the
    human were working together.
[12:50] Cremene
    I'll exterminate you, too!
[12:52] Kobayashi
    Can you do that?
[12:54] Kobayashi
    You have rules to follow, don't you?
[12:56] Cremene
    Those rules are only on paper.
[12:58] Cremene
    They're rules between dragons,
    so they don't apply to humans.
[13:04] Kobayashi
    He's making Tohru's father
    seem genuinely nice.
[13:08] Kobayashi
    But...
[13:12] Kobayashi
    Don't underestimate humans.
[13:15] Cremene
    A human who would try to protect a dragon?
[13:19] Cremene
    Hmph!
[13:21] Ilulu
    Kobayashi!
[13:24] Kobayashi
    Ow!
[13:29] Kobayashi
    That super hurts.
[13:32] Kobayashi
    You're late.
[13:49] Cremene
    You?!
[13:50] Cremene
    How are you here?!
[13:52] Tohru
    How dare you hurt Miss Kobayashi!
[13:55] Cremene
    E-Even if you're here, I just
    need to call in reinforcements!
[13:59] Cremene
    I'll summon Lady Elma at on—
[14:03] Tohru
    Choose the right words
    to plead for your life
[14:05] Tohru
    and I'll let you have your soul
    back after breaking your body.
[14:09] Tohru
    Now,
[14:10] Tohru
    beg for your life!
[14:21] Kobayashi
    D-Did you kill him?
[14:23] Tohru
    No, I just erased his
    memories of this world
[14:26] Tohru
    and sent him back from where he came.
[14:29] Tohru
    After punishing him a bit.
SIGN    Horn
[14:31] Kobayashi
    I see.
[14:33] Kobayashi
    Thank goodness.
[14:34] Kobayashi
    Now Ilulu can...
[14:36] Kobayashi
    Huh? Now that I'm relieved, I feel...
[14:42] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi?!
[14:43] Tohru
    Please hang in there!
[14:45] Tohru
    Dragon saliva can stop bleeding!
[14:48] Ilulu
    You just want to lick her, don't you?!
[14:50] Tohru
    Here I come, Miss Kobayashi!
    Lick, lick, lick, lick!
[14:54] Ilulu
    Man, your tongue is long!
[14:59] Kobayashi
    A functional member of society
[15:02] Kobayashi
    is someone who diligently obeys the rules
[15:05] Kobayashi
    and prioritizes their company
    over their private life.
[15:08] Kobayashi
    I believed that's just how it is.
[15:12] Kobayashi
    Because I was taught that it's my duty to
    fill my role as a functional member of society.
[15:17] Kobayashi
    Then, the next thing I knew, I no longer
    had any friends in my private life.
[15:23] Kobayashi
    That was when I met Tohru
    and managed to change.
[15:29] Kobayashi
    So, maybe,
[15:30] Kobayashi
    I was seeing my old self in Ilulu.
[15:37] Kobayashi
    Ah.
[15:38] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi?
[15:39] Tohru
    Stay with me!
[15:40] Kanna
    You're okay.
[15:42] Kobayashi
    Tohru.
[15:43] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan.
[15:45] Kobayashi
    Is this our home?
[15:46] Kobayashi
    Yes!
[15:47] Kobayashi
    I healed your wounds, as well!
[15:50] Kobayashi
    Where's Ilulu?
[15:53] Tohru
    Right there.
[15:59] Tohru
    This girl wouldn't even
    try to leave your side.
[16:02] Tohru
    Even if she's finally noticed what
    makes you so great, it's too late!
[16:06] Ilulu
    Kobayashi!
[16:09] Ilulu
    Can I let you trick me?
[16:14] Kobayashi
    Yeah, of course.
[16:27] Announcer
    Good morning.
[16:29] Announcer
    El Niño Miki is here to share
    today's national weather.
[16:33] Announcer
    Today, large regions will be seeing sunshine.
[16:33] Kobayashi
    Will she be fine without making
    her claws and tail disappear?
[16:37] Announcer
    We're under a high pressure system,
    so it's calm skies over a wide region.
[16:38] Kobayashi
    And if she could make her
    breasts a normal size.
[16:41] Announcer
    You can rest assured and
    hang your laundry out today.
[16:41] Tohru
    Ilulu is already pushing
    herself as it is at that size.
[16:44] Announcer
    The cherry blossoms are
    starting to bloom as well.
[16:45] Tohru
    If she wasn't pushing herself,
    her breasts would be even bigger.
[16:47] Announcer
    They're only just blooming, but there
    aren't many caterpillars at this time!
[16:49] Tohru
    Oh, she could probably make her claws
    and tail disappear if she tried.
[16:52] Announcer
    So, how about giving an early
    flower viewing a try right now?
[16:52] Kobayashi
    Huh? What do you mean she
    can't reduce her breasts?
[16:55] Kobayashi
    Give me about 5% of that!
[16:56] Announcer
    Mornings and evenings will
    be chilly in many locations.
[16:58] Ilulu
    Kobayashi, Kobayashi.
[17:00] Kobayashi
    What's the matter?
[17:01] Ilulu
    This is where excrement goes, right?
[17:04] Ilulu
    How does it work?
[17:05] Kobayashi
    I have to start from there?
[17:07] Kobayashi
    Yeah, you sit on there.
[17:09] Kobayashi
    Just like that.
[17:11] Ilulu
    I got it.
[17:13] Kobayashi
    We'll have to teach her all kinds of things.
[17:17] Kobayashi
    If only I had a talented
    maid at times like these.
[17:20] Kobayashi
    I'd see them in a whole new light.
[17:25] Kobayashi
    Sorry. Just while I'm away at work.
[17:28] Tohru
    It's fine.
[17:30] Tohru
    You and I have a special,
    eternal bond, after all!
[17:34] Kobayashi
    Don't add eternal on there so casually.
[17:36] Tohru
    Have a good day.
[17:38] ExerciseMan
    Have you been working those muscles?
[17:41] Tohru
    Now...
[17:41] ExerciseMan
    When you don't work out they'll degrade
    and it can hasten your body's aging.
[17:44] Tohru
    We were just trying to kill
    each other the other day.
[17:48] Ilulu
    There's no way Tohru would
    forgive a traitor.
[17:51] Ilulu
    She'll eliminate me.
[17:53] Ilulu
    But I want to know more about
    Kobayashi before that.
[17:56] Ilulu
    I won't go down easily.
[17:58] (Flashback) Kobayashi
    Don't fight!
[18:02] Tohru
    Here.
SIGN    Living as a Human Manual
SIGN    Kobayashi Tohru
[18:04] Tohru
    It's the manual I wrote on
    how to live as a human.
[18:07] Tohru
    Now, change your claws into human hands.
[18:15] Tohru
    Wha?
[18:21] Tohru
    Why are you laughing at yourself?!
[18:23] Tohru
    Do you suck at making hands?
[18:26] Ilulu
    I can't transform them well.
[18:28] Ilulu
    I'll read it like this.
[18:29] Tohru
    Oh, you can hold it with those hands?
[18:31] Ilulu
    They come with tiny hands.
[18:33] Tohru
    Creepy!
[18:37] Ilulu&Screen
    "Greetings.
[18:38] Ilulu&Screen
    Humans establish communication
    with greetings.
[18:42] Ilulu&Screen
    For now just repeat whatever
    greeting one says to you."
[18:46] Ilulu&Screen
    "Food.
[18:47] Ilulu&Screen
    Humans can mostly eat anything,
    but they stubbornly won't eat dragon meat.
[18:52] Ilulu&Screen
    Currently seeking ways to get them to eat it."
[18:55] Ilulu&Screen
    "Mating
[18:56] Ilulu&Screen
    I want to do it."
[18:57] Ilulu
    The stuff in here is biased!
[18:59] Tohru
    It's the truth for me.
[19:01] Ilulu&Screen
    "Clothing.
[19:02] Ilulu&Screen
    Wearing clothing as similar as possible to what
    other humans wear will keep you from standing out."
[19:07] Illu
    Hmm?
[19:08] Illu
    Aren't you going against this a bit?
SIGN    Conspicuous
[19:11] Tohru
    Yah!
[19:12] Ilulu
    Fine.
[19:13] Ilulu
    I'll wear human clothing, too.
[19:16] Tohru
    We don't have your size.
[19:17] Ilulu
    There are Kanna's clothes, right?
[19:19] Tohru
    The size won't fit!
[19:20] Ilulu
    See, it fit.
[19:24] Tohru
    What did I just tell you?
[19:26] Tohru
    Why don't you transform
    your scales like I do?
[19:30] Ilulu
    I don't have the skill to do that.
[19:32] Tohru
    I'll lend you my clothes, then.
[19:36] Tohru
    What are you planning to do from now on?
[19:38] Ilulu
    What will I do?
[19:40] Tohru
    What do you want to do?
[19:42] Tohru
    There's something, isn't there?
[19:44] Ilulu
    Something I want to do?
[19:46] Ilulu
    I'll think on it.
[19:48] Tohru
    That so?
[19:49] Ilulu
    Yeah.
[19:51] Tohru
    Well, you're welcome to stay in our
    home as long as you like until you decide.
[19:55] Ilulu
    You couldn't fully say
    that polite phrase there.
[19:57] Tohru
    This might come as a surprise,
[19:59] Tohru
    but I don't take kindly to you being here!
[20:02] Ilulu
    That's not a surprise.
[20:04] Tohru
    After all, think about how you showed up!
[20:07] Tohru
    You were like a bloodthirsty berserker.
[20:09] Ilulu
    No, that was because fighting
    you seemed like fun.
[20:13] Ilulu
    Wait, I looked like that?!
[20:15] Tohru
    Please figure out what
    you want to do quickly.
[20:19] Tohru
    They say those who don't work don't eat.
[20:21] Ilulu
    What about Kanna?
[20:23] Tohru
    Kanna has her job as an elementary school student.
[20:26] Ilulu
    Then I'll be an elementary
    school student, too.
[20:29] Tohru
    You have to be a child for that.
[20:31] Tohru
    You're about the same
    age as me, aren't you?
[20:34] Ilulu
    I see.
[20:39] Tohru
    At least think it over.
[20:42] Kobayashi
    I'm home.
[20:43] Tohru
    Welcome home!
[20:45] Kobayashi
    What's Ilulu doing?
[20:47] Tohru
    Thinking about what she wants to do.
[20:50] Kobayashi
    Hmm...
[20:54] Kobayashi
    I hope you find something.
[20:58] Kobayashi
    What is it?
[20:59] Ilulu
    I figured out what I want to do for now.
[21:02] Kobayashi
    Oh, what's that?
[21:04] Ilulu
    I want to make babies with you.
[21:05] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[21:06] Tohru
    Huh?
[21:07] Ilulu
    When I thought about it,
[21:09] Ilulu
    I am at an age where I could
    have and raise children.
[21:12] Ilulu
    I want you to fill the loneliness
    from my lack of family.
[21:16] Ilulu
    Kobayashi, have sex with me!
[21:18] Tohru
    No way!
[21:20] Tohru
    That's just no, no, no, no!
[21:21] Tohru
    Not happening!
[21:23] Kobayashi
    I'm a woman, anyway.
[21:25] Ilulu
    I can give you a thing again!
[21:26] Tohru
    No, you won't!
[21:27] Tohru
    If you do that, then I'm doing her!
[21:29] Kanna
    Vulgar.
[21:30] Kobayashi
    Right?
[21:31] Tohru
    Absolutely not, got it?!
[21:32] Kobayashi
    I'm not really holding onto my chastity for
    a reason, but I'm not giving it to you all.
[21:40] Kanna
    Oh!
[21:42] Kobayashi
    That's for Ilulu.
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:22] Kobayashi
    Where should we have Ilulu sleep?
[23:24] Kobayashi
    We don't have space for another bed.
[23:26] Ilulu
    What about here?
[23:27] Kobayashi
    The closet?
[23:28] Ilulu
    It's calming.
[23:29] Kobayashi
    If you're okay with it, that works.
[23:30] Ilulu
    Yeah, I like it.
SIGN    
    Episode 3
SIGN    
    Extracurricular Activities (Of Course They're Not Normal)
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Cancer
SIGN    You Might Get Caught In An Unexpected Event
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    Astrology is meaningless, anyway.
SIGN    Don't completely reject it
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Cancer.

E3 - Extracurricular Activities (Of Course They're Not Normal)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, I'm here to play!
[00:04] Kanna
    Oh!
[00:05] Kanna
    Saikawa's here!
SIGN    Saikawa Riko
[00:08] Kanna
    Hello, Saikawa.
[00:09] Kanna
    I welcome you!
[00:11] Saikawa
    Yes, I'm glad to be here!
[00:13] Saikawa
    Huh?
[00:15] Saikawa
    Where's your mother?
[00:17] Kanna
    Shopping with Lady Tohru.
[00:21] Saikawa
    Meaning...
[00:23] Saikawa
    it's just the two of us?!
[00:25] Saikawa
    Oh, my, what do I do?
[00:29] Saikawa
    I'm going to climb the stairs to adulthood.
[00:29] Kanna
    Saikawa?
[00:31] Saikawa
    Is this my own Cinderella story?!
[00:33] Saikawa
    K-Kanna-san, may I borrow your bathroom?
[00:36] Kanna
    Down and to the right.
[00:44] Saikawa
    I'm so nervous.
[00:49] Saikawa
    Oh, I'm sorry.
[00:56] Saikawa
    Who is that woman?!
[00:57] Kanna
    Ilulu. A friend.
[01:03] Saikawa
    So it isn't* just the two of us.
[02:37] Saikawa
    How long have you known each other?
[02:39] Kanna
    I've known her since a while back.
[02:41] Kanna
    But she only came here recently,
[02:43] Kanna
    and now she's living here.
[02:44] Saikawa
    She's living here?!
[02:49] Saikawa
    Now that I think about it,
[02:50] Saikawa
    there are a lot of mysteries*
    surrounding Kanna-san.
[02:52] Saikawa
    She calls her mother by
    her last name, Kobayashi,
[02:55] Saikawa
    and she addresses the maid as "Lady."
[02:57] Saikawa
    Sometimes I think she's spacing out,
[02:59] Saikawa
    but then she's oddly smart and athletic.
[03:01] Kanna
    Saikawa, let's play already.
[03:05] Saikawa
    Whatever! She's still cute!
[03:08] Saikawa
    Oh, I brought cards with me.
[03:11] Kanna
    Mm!
[03:16] Saikawa
    Ilulu-san, would...
[03:17] Saikawa
    you like to join us?
[03:19] Kanna
    Join us!
[03:22] Ilulu
    I'm fine.
[03:28] Saikawa
    Did I say anything to upset her?
[03:32] Saikawa
    Ah, I lost.
[03:34] Kanna
    Saikawa, you let it show
    on your face too much.
[03:38] Kanna
    Penalty game.
[03:39] Kanna
    Rub my tummy.
[03:49] Saikawa
    Wouldn't this actually be a reward?
[03:54] Lucoa
    Hey, I happened to be in the area.
[03:57] Lucoa
    I brought snacks.
[04:00] Kanna
    Kobayashi and Tohru aren't home.
[04:01] Lucoa
    Oh, my. I suppose I'll wait for them, then.
[04:04] Lucoa
    You can split the snacks with Miss Saikawa.
[04:07] Both
    Yay!
[04:13] Lucoa
    Hey.
[04:15] Lucoa
    You're not going to play with those two?
[04:20] Ilulu
    I have no right to.
[04:22] Ilulu
    I tried to destroy this city.
[04:27] Ilulu
    I haven't forgiven myself yet.
[04:31] Lucoa
    Would you like to turn back time, then,
    and make it so that never happened?
[04:35] Lucoa
    I could do that much for you.
[04:39] Ilulu
    It's fine.
[04:40] Ilulu
    That wouldn't be right.
[04:42] Ilulu
    I can't erase what Kobayashi said to me.
[04:46] Lucoa
    I see.
[04:48] Lucoa
    But no right to, huh?
[04:50] Lucoa
    If you're going to look it at like that,
[04:52] Lucoa
    there aren't many Dragons who do
    have a right to interact with humans.
[04:57] Ilulu
    Mm.
[05:01] Lucoa
    It's not working like it
    did with Miss Kobayashi.
[05:04] Lucoa
    Well, I'll go try talking to them for a bit.
[05:08] Lucoa
    You can go ahead and wait in the bathroom.
[05:15] Ilulu
    I mean, to be honest, I want to play.
[05:18] Ilulu
    I won't lie about those feelings anymore,
[05:22] Ilulu
    but what I did is a different story.
[05:25] Ilulu
    I want to avoid asking
    Kobayashi about it, too,
[05:28] Ilulu
    because she'd probably resolve it easily.
[05:31] Saikawa
    Ah, I lost again.
[05:34] Kanna
    Saikawa,
[05:35] Kanna
    are you losing on purpose?
[05:37] Saikawa
    Not at all!
[05:40] Kanna
    But I'm bored with playing
    cards by ourselves now.
[05:42] Saikawa
    Yeah, it is just the two of us.
[05:45] Lucoa
    Need to pee beam!
[05:52] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, I'm going to the bathroom.
[05:53] Kanna
    Again?
[05:55] Saikawa
    Why do I need to go the
    bathroom so much today?
[05:59] Saikawa
    Huh?!
[06:01] Saikawa
    I-I'm sorry!
[06:03] Saikawa
    Huh?!
[06:04] Saikawa
    What? Why?!
[06:06] Saikawa
    Huh? Uhh...
[06:07] Ilulu
    Hey, what's your name?
[06:09] Saikawa
    Huh? Saikawa.
[06:12] Ilulu
    Saikawa.
[06:13] Ilulu
    I actually wanted to play with you earlier.
[06:16] Saikawa
    Huh?
[06:18] Ilulu
    But I was a violent person,
[06:21] Ilulu
    so I didn't think it was okay.
[06:23] Saikawa
    Violent person?
[06:26] Ilulu
    I tried to break all sorts of things.
[06:29] Saikawa
    Oh, a delinquent.
[06:32] Ilulu
    You don't like violent people, right?
[06:40] Saikawa
    Well, I'm a violent person myself.
[06:44] Ilulu
    Really?
[06:45] Saikawa
    Yeah.
[06:46] Saikawa
    I often act out when I don't like something.
[06:49] Ilulu
    Huh?!
[06:50] Saikawa
    At first I didn't like Kanna-san either,
[06:52] Saikawa
    so I thought about striking her down.
[06:54] Ilulu
    S-She's...
[06:56] Saikawa
    But she's cute, so I decided
    I wanted to be friends.
[07:01] Ilulu
    She's...
[07:03] Saikawa
    You're cute, too, Ilulu-san,
[07:05] Saikawa
    so want to be friends?
[07:07] Ilulu
    She's not thinking at all!
[07:10] Lucoa
    Children are still in the middle
    of learning how to properly handle
[07:15] Lucoa
    responsibility and the weight
    of their sins.
[07:19] Lucoa
    But Ilulu's environment never
    allowed her that opportunity.
[07:23] Lucoa
    She had to change or she'd be deceived.
[07:26] Lucoa
    She had to change or she wouldn't
    be able to fight alongside adults.
[07:31] Lucoa
    But for now she can forget
    all that and go back.
[07:35] Lucoa
    Because there's an adult who
    will kindly trick her here.
[07:38] Lucoa
    She should go back to being an irresponsible
    kid who doesn't know right from wrong.
[08:14] Kobayashi
    We're home.
[08:15] Kobayashi
    Lucoa-san's here?
[08:17] Kobayashi
    Sorry, we ran into Elma.
[08:20] Lucoa
    Shh.
[08:22] Both
    Hmm?
[08:27] Tohru
    Should I wake them?
[08:29] Kobayashi
    No, go grab a blanket.
[08:32] Kobayashi
    I should call Saikawa-san's parents.
SIGN    Episode 3
SIGN    Extracurricular Activities (Of Course They're Not Normal)
[08:44] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi's watching me.
[08:47] Tohru
    She's staring right at me.
[08:50] Tohru
    I can feel the passion behind her gaze!
[08:53] Tohru
    Ahh, if she keeps looking at me like
    she's licking me all over, I'll...
[08:58] Tohru
    I'll!
[09:00] Tohru
    A sigh?!
[09:02] Kobayashi
    Not at you.
[09:03] Kobayashi
    At that maid outfit.
[09:05] Tohru
    This outfit?
[09:07] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[09:09] Kobayashi
    I bought a similar outfit
    when I was in high school,
[09:13] Kobayashi
    using the money from my first paycheck.
[09:16] Kobayashi
    I wanted to show it off to my family.
[09:18] Kobayashi
    Then...
[09:20] Tohru
    Then?
[09:21] Kobayashi
    They said I didn't look good in it.
[09:24] Kobayashi
    Everyone disliked it and told me so.
[09:27] Kobayashi
    Ever since then I've stuck
    to being an onlooker.
[09:31] Tohru
    So, after having that exchange with her
[09:34] Tohru
    I thought to myself,
[09:37] Tohru
    "Why don't we try making a maid outfit
    that would look good on Miss Kobayashi?"
[09:41] Tohru
    So, I was hoping I could borrow
    some wisdom from all of you.
[09:45] Lucoa
    You're always so frantic when
    it comes to Miss Kobayashi.
[09:49] Tohru
    I'm grateful you could all come.
[09:52] Tohru
    Wait!
[09:52] Tohru
    I didn't call for you!
[09:55] Elma
    Mr. Takiya invited me.
[09:57] Tohru
    Mr. Takiya!
[09:59] Takiya
    I'd feel bad leaving her out.
[10:02] Fafnir
    You have a bad habit of hiding your
    embarrassment with fake anger and hostility.
[10:06] Tohru
    N-No I don't!
[10:09] Kobayashi
    Hey, I'm really sorry.
[10:12] Kobayashi
    When I woke up Tohru had
    already gathered everyone.
[10:15] Georgie
    That's cold of you, Kobayashi-san.
SIGN    Georgie
[10:18] Georgie
    We're comrades.
[10:19] Georgie
    How could I ever hesitate to
    spare time for a comrade?
[10:23] Kobayashi
    Georgie-san.
[10:25] Tohru
    Yes, yes. Okay, we're starting!
[10:27] Tohru
    For now, would you all please
    draw out your ideas?
[10:30] All
    Yes!
[10:38] Saikawa
    That's incredible, Kanna-san!
[10:39] Saikawa
    If you buy one more property,
    you'll have a monopoly on the area!
[10:43] Kanna
    Monopoly?
[10:45] Saikawa
    You'll be the king of it!
[10:47] Saikawa
    You'll be able to do whatever
    you want with that area!
[10:50] Kanna
    Oh!
[10:53] Saikawa
    Ah, there's such a big
    house in Kanna's area!
[10:56] Shouta
    Sorry, but this a competition.
[10:59] Saikawa
    Demon!
[11:00] Saikawa
    You're heartless!
[11:00] Ilulu
    I don't really get it, but it's a game
    that brings out the worst in them, huh?
[11:05] Elma
    Here!
[11:06] Tohru
    That was fast, Elma.
[11:08] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi is stoic and quick
    to finish her work at the company,
[11:12] Elma
    so I thought of this!
[11:14] Tohru
    The fact that you're hooked on
    daifuku comes off too strongly.
SIGN    Daifuku goes in here
[11:18] Elma
    Huh? That's no good?
[11:20] Elma
    But they're quick to eat
    and replenish your nutrients.
[11:23] Tohru
    Please just go play with the children
    in the other room already.
[11:27] Takiya
    It's my turn next.
[11:29] Kobayashi
    Hmm, this is too cute, isn't it?
[11:32] Kobayashi
    I don't think something like
    this would look good on me.
[11:35] Takiya
    Ahh, I wasn't imagining you wearing it.
[11:39] Kobayashi
    Do that.
[11:40] Fafnir
    Tch.
[11:41] Lucoa
    I'm done, too!
[11:43] Kobayashi
    Too much skin!
[11:44] Lucoa
    That's what our local servants wore.
[11:47] Kobayashi
    It's too ethnic!
[11:49] Georgie
    Here.
[11:51] Kobayashi
    Georgie-san.
[11:51] Tohru
    My real hope. I wonder what she'll propose.
[11:56] Georgie
    Kobayashi-san.
[11:57] Kobayashi
    Oh, yes?
[11:59] Kobayashi
    A long dress style,
[12:01] Kobayashi
    with few adornments and an air
    of refinement despite the simplicity.
SIGN    No daifuku
SIGN    No daifuku
[12:06] Georgie
    I believe that's your preferred type?
[12:08] Kobayashi
    Yes, it is.
[12:10] Georgie
    However, what is a maid outfit?
[12:14] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[12:14] Georgie
    It's true the designs have changed
    with different eras and customs,
[12:18] Georgie
    and those designs continue to be polished
    every day as the maid outfit changes.
[12:22] Georgie
    However, it is always a maid who wears one.
[12:26] Georgie
    They are not a maid because
    they wear a maid outfit.
[12:32] Georgie
    They become maid outfits because
    a maid wears that outfit.
[12:37] Georgie
    Kobayashi-san.
[12:39] Georgie
    I am also a student.
[12:41] Georgie
    I cannot wear my maid outfit
    at any and all times.
[12:45] Georgie
    However, no matter what I wear,
[12:48] Georgie
    yes, even if I wear my school uniform,
[12:51] Georgie
    so long as I remain a maid,
[12:54] Georgie
    even that school uniform can become
    a maid outfit, wouldn't you agree?
[12:58] Georgie
    Yes, that means a maid outfit
[13:01] Georgie
    is worn around the heart!
[13:02] Kobayashi
    It's the spirit of service!
SIGN    Perfect
[13:05] Tohru
    We're getting off track!
[13:07] Elma
    Tohru!
[13:08] Tohru
    You don't need to come back.
[13:10] Elma
    We finished a round!
[13:12] Elma
    That aside, you've been
    making jabs at ours,
[13:16] Elma
    so what kind of outfit did you draw?
[13:18] Tohru
    Oh, uh, well...
[13:19] Elma
    That's kind of suspicious.
[13:21] Elma
    Show us!
[13:21] Tohru
    Oh, hey, stop, pervert!
[13:24] Elma
    Hmm? What? It's completely blank.
[13:27] Elma
    You couldn't think of anything?
[13:31] Tohra
    No...
[13:32] Tohra
    I was thinking I'd like Miss
    Kobayashi to wear my maid outfit.
[13:40] Kobayashi
    Your outfit is too cute for me.
[13:44] Tohru
    Right.
[13:46] Kobayashi
    But, sure.
[13:50] Kobayashi
    You did call everyone over for me.
[13:54] Kobayashi
    I'll wear it.
[13:56] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi...
[13:59] Tohru
    Okay, I put it on!
[14:01] All
    Oh!
[14:04] Takiya
    You look good.
[14:05] Georgie
    You're cute, Kobayashi-san.
[14:07] Kobayashi
    Yes, yes, thank you for the flattery.
[14:11] Tohru
    Let's take a photo!
[14:13] Tohru
    It's you and me as double maids!
[14:17] Kobayashi
    Let's get everyone together
    if we're taking one.
[14:19] Tohru
    Huh?!
[14:20] Tohru
    Okay, everyone, please line up.
[14:23] Kanna
    I'm beside Kobayashi.
[14:25] Ilulu
    Ah, not fair!
[14:26] Tohru
    Hey, I was first, you all!
[14:31] Kobayashi
    Hey, Tohru.
[14:32] Tohru
    Yes?
[14:34] Kobayashi
    Today I realized something.
[14:36] Tohru
    What's that?
[14:37] Kobayashi
    Do you remember what Georgie-san said?
[14:41] Tohru
    Yes.
[14:42] Tohru
    They become maid outfits
    because a maid wears them.
[14:44] Tohru
    That also means
[14:46] Tohru
    that no matter what outfit they wear, it's not
    a maid outfit if it's not being worn by a maid.
[14:50] Tohru
    It's just cosplay.
[14:52] Tohru
    I was always rejecting your outfit,
    but after wearing it I had a change of heart,
[14:57] Tohru
    embarrassing though it was.
[14:59] Tohru
    It wasn't bad.
[15:02] Tohru
    I thought, "Oh, so this is what
    I wanted to wear, isn't it?"
[15:06] Tohru
    I thought cute outfits wouldn't look good
    on me, so I always wore men's clothing.
[15:12] Tohru
    I was worried about whether or
    not I would look good in it.
[15:15] Tohru
    But if I wanted to wear a maid outfit,
    then I should've just worn it without caring.
[15:18] Tohru
    That's when I remembered something.
[15:21] Tohru
    I wanted to cosplay.
[15:24] Tohru
    But I couldn't make myself look cute,
[15:27] Tohru
    so I turned to style and refinement
    and became an annoying maid otaku.
[15:33] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi.
[15:36] Kobayashi
    But you know,
[15:38] Kobayashi
    seeing you and having you serve as a maid
[15:42] Kobayashi
    made me realize the outfit you
    wear is a proper maid outfit.
[15:49] Tohru
    You're always so genuine when you
    take back things you've said.
[15:53] Tohru
    I love that unfair side of you,
    Miss Kobayashi.
[15:56] Kobayashi
    I never could have said this to you
    when you first came here, though.
[16:01] Kobayashi
    Please continue helping
    with housework, Tohru.
[16:05] Tohru
    You should call me "maid" there!
[16:12] Ilulu
    Hey, I'm out of money.
[16:15] Kanna
    Ilulu, you waste too much.
[16:17] Saikawa
    It's all right.
[16:18] Saikawa
    You'll pass the bank soon,
    so you'll get more money then.
[16:23] Ilulu
    I will?!
[16:25] Ilulu
    But still, after that it's Shouta street.
[16:28] Ilulu
    No matter where I stop I'll have
    to pay expensive rental fees.
[16:32] Shouta
    Go on, rest assured and roll the dice.
[16:36] Ilulu
    Demon!
SIGN    Bankrupt
[16:39] Kanna
    Ilulu's out.
SIGN    Neighborhood
     Notice
SIGN    Oborozuka
     Neighborhood
    Association
[16:42] Sasakibe
    Tohru-chan, do you have any hobbies?
[16:44] Tohru
    Hobbies? I'm a maid.
[16:47] Tohru
    I have... plenty of free time.
[16:53] Tohru
    What are your hobbies, Miss Sasakibe?
[16:55] Sasakibe
    Lately I've been into making sweets.
[16:58] Tohru
    Is that what that earlier
    piercing noise was?
[17:01] Saikawa
    Huh?! I'm sorry, was it that loud?!
[17:04] Tohru
    Still, I can't think of anything.
[17:08] Tohru
    In the past I was interested in travel.
[17:12] Tohru
    Music, huh?
[17:14] Tohru
    That's popular among humans.
[17:18] Tohru
    Speaking of music,
    there's nihilistic Mr. Yana.
[17:21] Yana
    So, you came to ask me about it?
[17:24] Tohru
    Please teach me what makes music fun.
[17:26] Yana
    Probably the way it heats up your
    soul and makes your heart go bomber.
[17:30] Tohru
    Your heart go bomber?
[17:31] Skeleton
    Bomber!
[17:33] Yana
    I'll teach you a little bit, so give it a try.
[17:36] Tohru
    Okay.
[17:46] Tohru
    Hmm, I don't quite understand.
[17:49] Tohru
    Huh?
[17:49] Tohru
    What's the matter?
[17:51] Yana
    It hurts. Your talent hurts.
[17:53] Tohru
    I made him depressed for some reason.
[17:55] Tohru
    Oh, my, Sone-san.
[17:57] Sone
    I brought over another
    one I happened to make.
[18:00] Tohru
    Oh, this one turned out well, too!
[18:03] Tohru
    Do you have fun making things like this?
[18:06] Sone
    Want to try making one?
[18:10] Tohru
    All done.
[18:12] Sone
    Hmm.
[18:13] Sone
    It's an incredibly elaborate design.
[18:16] Sone
    There aren't many who could
    make something this good.
[18:19] Tohru
    But I don't quite understand
    what makes it fun.
[18:23] Tohru
    I just tried playing music, too, but...
[18:26] Sone
    I happened to hear that,
[18:29] Sone
    but it felt like you were just playing
    the score with precise timing.
[18:34] Tohru
    Oh, you could hear that?
[18:36] Sone
    It's probably because it was too easy for you,
[18:39] Sone
    so there wasn't any room
    to pour emotions into it.
[18:42] Sone
    Without curiosity and emotion you
    won't be satisfied by that hobby.
[18:48] Tohru
    So, that's how it is?
[18:51] Kanna
    I'm home.
[18:52] Tohru
    Welcome home.
[18:55] Tohru
    Kanna, do you have any hobbies?
[18:58] Kanna
    Hobbies?
[18:59] Kanna
    Walking this white line.
[19:02] Tohru
    What's fun about that?
[19:04] Kanna
    I die if I fall.
[19:06] Tohru
    I see. It's training for
    fighting in limited spaces.
[19:11] Tohru
    I took Kanna's instincts
    as a dragon lightly!
[19:14] Kanna
    Oh, it stops.
[19:19] Tohru
    Like this! Like this!
[19:20] Kanna
    I don't go that far.
[19:23] Tohru
    But you can't call that a hobby.
[19:26] Kanna
    It's fun when I do it with Saikawa.
[19:29] Ilulu
    Welcome home.
[19:31] Ilulu
    Ah! Not fair, Kanna!
[19:33] Ilulu
    Give me some donuts, too!
[19:34] Kanna
    No.
[19:35] Ilulu
    Tohru!
[19:37] Tohru
    You laze about every day.
[19:39] Tohru
    Those who don't work, don't eat.
[19:41] Tohru
    Ilulu, do you have any hobbies?
[19:44] Ilulu
    Hobbies? Sleeping?
[19:47] Tohru
    That's less a hobby and more your way of life.
[19:50] Ilulu
    You're mean.
[19:51] Ilulu
    So good.
[19:53] Tohru
    Hmph.
[19:54] Kanna
    What flavor?
[19:55] Tohru
    Hobbies are hard.
[19:55] Ilulu
    Chocolate. Yours?
[19:57] Kanna
    Cinnamon.
[19:58] Kanna
    Idols are popular at school.
[20:01] Tohru
    Idol worship?
[20:03] Tohru
    But I'm not interested in that stuff.
[20:09] Tohru
    No, wait.
[20:10] Tohru
    I know!
[20:19] Tohru
    I'd just need Miss Kobayashi
    to become an idol!
[20:27] Takiya
    Good work.
[20:28] Kobayashi
    Good work.
[20:30] Kobayashi
    Yes, hello?
[20:31] Kanna
    Kobayashi, Kobayashi!
[20:32] Kanna
    Hurry home quick!
[20:33] Kanna
    Lady Tohru's lost it!
[20:35] Kobayashi
    Huh?!
[20:35] Kobayashi
    What happened?!
[20:37] Tohru
    Love kiss, lick kiss,
[20:38] Tohru
    love kiss, lick kiss,
[20:40] Tohru
    I love Miss Kobayashi!
[20:43] Tohru
    Love kiss, lick kiss,
[20:45] Tohru
    love kiss, lick kiss,
[20:47] Tohru
    I love Miss Kobayashi!
[20:50] Tohru
    Love lick kiss!
[20:53] Kobayashi
    What is this?
[20:55] Kanna
    Lady Tohru's been constantly producing
    Kobayashi goods and showing them off to us.
[20:59] Ilulu
    She's been singing to us, too.
[21:02] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi! Hobbies are fun!
[21:06] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, Miss Kobayashi, Miss
    Kobayashi, Miss Kobayashi, together forever!
[21:07] Kobayashi
    I'm not much better when I get wasted,
    so I can't put my foot down.
[21:14] Shouta
    I've reached the target earnings.
[21:16] Shouta
    Now I just need to reach the goal!
[21:19] Kanna
    Saikawa, what do we do?
[21:27] Shouta
    Huh?!
[21:28] Shouta
    No way!
[21:29] Kanna
    Goal.
[21:29] Saikawa
    That's my Kanna-san!
[21:31] Shouta
    How?!
[21:33] Saikawa
    I transferred all my assets to Kanna-san!
[21:37] Shouta
    Huh?! That's not fair!
[21:39] Saikawa
    Everything that's mine in Kanna-san's!
[21:41] Saikawa
    My heart, my body, everything!
[21:43] Saikawa
    Ahh, my king!
[21:45] Kanna
    Worship me!
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:21] Tohru
    What's your hobby, Miss Lucoa?
[23:23] Lucoa
    Hmm, Shouta, I guess?
[23:24] Tohru
    I figured.
[23:26] Tohru
    And yours is games, Mr. Fafnir?
[23:27] Fafnir
    No.
[23:28] Tohru
    It's games, right?
[23:29] Fafnir
    No.
[23:30] Tohru
    Oh, come on.
[23:31] Fafnir
    I said it's not.
SIGN    Episode 4
SIGN    When in Rome, Do as the Romans Do (It's Hard to Match Others)
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Sagittarius
SIGN    The bathroom lock might break, leaving you trapped~
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    Rewind time to before entering the bathroom!
SIGN    Please tell people when something's impossible
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Sagittarius!

E4 - When in Rome, Do as the Romans Do (It's Hard to Match Others)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] Kobayashi
    Oh?
[00:01] Kobayashi
    This is a really beautiful array of code.
[00:04] Kobayashi
    Who wrote this?
[00:06] Takiya
    I don't know.
[00:08] Elma
    Here's your tea, Miss Kobayashi.
[00:10] Kobayashi
    Thanks, Elma.
[00:12] Elma
    Why are you staring at
    the code I wrote?
[00:15] Elma
    Is there something wrong with it?
[00:16] Kobayashi
    No, the opposite.
[00:18] Kobayashi
    I was impressed by— Hmm?
[00:21] Kobayashi
    What did you just say?
[00:23] Elma
    I wrote it.
[01:55] Elma
    I can grow, too.
[01:57] Kobayashi
    I just assumed you'd be
    stuck serving tea forever.
[02:01] Elma
    You're the one who gave me all
    those books and told me to study!
[02:05] Kobayashi
    I guess you do have high specs,
    since you're a dragon.
[02:09] Kobayashi
    This is amazing, Elma!
[02:10] Elma
    Hmm? What?
[02:12] Elma
    Are you praising me?
[02:13] Kobayashi
    I am!
[02:14] Kobayashi
    This means we have another
    fighting member on our team!
[02:17] Kobayashi
    You did well, Elma!
[02:20] Elma
    Well, just leave it to me!
[02:22] Kobayashi
    Could you start by handling this, then?
SIGN    Fwd: Please Review
SIGN    Fwd: Please Provide Test Code
SIGN    Fwd: Urgent
SIGN    Fwd: Changes to the UI System
[02:25] Elma
    Sure.
[02:25] Kobayashi
    And this!
[02:26] Elma
    Sure.
[02:27] Kobayashi
    Oh, this, too.
[02:28] Elma
    Sure?
[02:29] Kobayashi
    And this.
SIGN    Fwd: Changes to the UI System Kobayashi 10:00
SIGN    Fwd: Urgent Kobayashi 10:00
SIGN    Fwd: Please Review Kobayashi 10:00
SIGN    Fwd: About the Launch Kobayashi 10:00
SIGN    Fwd: Please Test First Kobayashi 10:00
SIGN    Fwd: The Review Deadline Has Passed Kobayashi 10:00
[02:29] Kobayashi
    And this one, this one, this one,
    and this one too.
[02:32] Kobayashi
    We're counting on you.
[02:33] Elma
    You're asking too much
    of me, Miss Kobayashi!
[02:35] Takiya
    No, no.
[02:36] Takiya
    That's the amount of work you
    should be handling normally.
[02:39] Elma
    Huh?
[02:40] Takiya
    Kobayashi-san's the one who's been
[02:42] Takiya
    handling your share of the work
    while you were serving tea.
[02:45] Takiya
    Kobayashi-san already has twice
    that much work on her plate, too.
[02:50] Elma
    Isn't that kind of incredible,
    Mister Takiya?
[02:53] Takiya
    Yeah.
[02:54] Takiya
    She's our pillar.
[02:56] Elma
    Pillar?
[02:59] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi's a pillar?
[03:02] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi!
[03:03] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[03:04] Elma
    I challenge you to a duel!
[03:07] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[03:07] Elma
    Let's fight fair and square!
[03:09] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[03:11] Kobayashi
    Why so suddenly?
[03:12] Kobayashi
    Maybe she's mad that I
    gave her too much work?
[03:15] Tohru
    That's just how Elma is!
[03:18] Kobayashi
    Hmm, I kind of understand how you
    feel when she comes after you.
[03:22] Tohru
    She always challenges me
    to strange matches, too.
[03:25] Tohru
    There were tests of strength,
[03:26] Tohru
    seeing whose tail was longer,
[03:28] Tohru
    and speed eating competitions, as well.
[03:30] Tohru
    She even challenged me to so see who could
    strip travelers of their clothes first, once.
[03:34] Kobayashi
    Are you two the North Wind and the Sun?
[03:36] Kobayashi
    So, that's how you two played
    together all the time.
[03:39] Kobayashi
    You're great friends.
[03:40] Tohru
    No, we're not!
[03:42] Tohru
    Normally we should be trying
    to kill each other.
[03:44] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi,
    please be careful around Elma.
[03:48] Tohru
    Your gaze is a sharp as
    those in the chaos faction.
[03:50] Kobayashi
    Is my resting face really that bad?
[03:52] Elma
    Good!
[03:54] Elma
    I'm glad you showed and didn't
    run away, Miss Kobayashi!
[03:57] Kobayashi
    Well, I did consider taking PTO...
[04:01] Kobayashi
    Can we settle things with
    this before we compete?
SIGN    Limited
    Soft, Sweet Pudding
[04:04] Kobayashi
    It's one of the limited-time sweets from
    the station. A soft, sweet pudding.
[04:08] Elma
    Oh!
[04:10] Kobayashi
    Normally, this would satisfy Elma.
[04:14] Elma
    No! I'll take that when I win the match!
[04:16] Kobayashi
    That's how she's taking it?
SIGN    Fwd: About the System Changes
SIGN    Fwd: The Review Deadline Has Passed, What's Going On?
SIGN    Fwd: Please Test It
SIGN    Fwd: Changes to Manual Page 12
SIGN    Fwd: Please Test First
SIGN    Fwd: Changes to the UI System
SIGN    Fwd: Urgent
SIGN    Fwd: About the Review
SIGN    Fwd: Please Provide Test Code
SIGN    Fwd: The Review Deadline's Almost Here, How Is It Going?
SIGN    Fwd: System Changes
SIGN    Fwd: System Change Request
SIGN    Fwd: Urgent
[04:18] Takiya
    The winner will be whoever completes the
    most of this work that hasn't been touched yet.
[04:22] Elma
    All right!
[04:23] Kobayashi
    You say it hasn't been touched yet,
    but someone's responsible for it, right?
[04:27] Kobayashi
    Who's that?
[04:29] Takiya
    That's me.
[04:30] Takiya
    I'm taking PTO to go around
    Akiba with Faf-kun!
[04:33] Takiya
    See you later!
[04:35] Kobayashi
    That bastard. Thank you
    for all your hard work.
[04:39] Elma
    I can't tell if you're mad
    or thankful from that response.
[04:43] Kobayashi
    Well, shall we get started?
[04:44] Elma
    Y-Yeah.
[04:46] Kobayashi
    Though...
[04:48] Kobayashi
    Of course this would be a dull competition.
[04:52] Kobayashi
    It doesn't matter if I win or lose,
[04:54] Kobayashi
    the work gets done either way.
[04:56] Staff
    Lunch time.
[04:58] Staff
    Want to go to the usual ramen shop?
[05:01] Kobayashi
    Hey, come with us, Elma.
[05:02] Elma
    I'm not going. I'll finish
    this in the meantime.
[05:06] Kobayashi
    Beating a mere human like me won't
    make you very happy, right?
[05:11] Kobayashi
    If I made you mad, I'll apologize.
[05:13] Elma
    I'm not mad.
[05:15] Elma
    And don't sell yourself short.
[05:17] Elma
    Don't become a pillar, either.
[05:19] Kobayashi
    A pillar?
[05:20] Elma
    That's right.
[05:21] Elma
    I've watched many humans become
    pillars in the other world.
[05:26] Kobayashi
    What do you mean?
[05:27] Elma
    They support others by becoming a sacrifice.
[05:30] Kobayashi
    Human sacrifices?!
[05:32] Elma
    The dragons of the harmony
    faction help humans,
[05:34] Elma
    but many of my companions
    claimed sacrifices in exchange.
[05:38] Elma
    Those people became human
    pillars and died...
[05:41] Elma
    I couldn't stand watching that.
[05:43] Kobayashi
    This discussion's taken
    an awfully heavy turn.
[05:46] Elma
    So, I wish you'd stop sacrificing
    yourself and working so much!
[05:51] Elma
    I'll lead the others for you!
[05:54] Kobayashi
    Elma, bring your head closer.
[05:57] Kobayashi
    Then close your eyes.
[05:58] Elma
    Wh-What?
[06:00] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi, you already have Tohru.
[06:03] Elma
    Well, if you want that from me, I'm willing...
[06:08] Kobayashi
    Ei!
[06:09] Elma
    Ow!
[06:09] Elma
    Ow!
[06:10] Elma
    Ow!
[06:11] Elma
    Wh-What are you doing?!
[06:13] Kobayashi
    Hmph. That's called an unnecessary concern.
[06:17] Elma
    What?
[06:19] Kobayashi
    The world you live in now isn't the
    same as the one you came from.
[06:23] Kobayashi
    So, don't go thinking everything is the same.
[06:26] Kobayashi
    There are no human sacrifices
    in modern Japan.
[06:29] Kobayashi
    Also, I still have my honor as your
    senior here, so don't steal my work.
[06:33] Elma
    I-I see.
[06:35] Kobayashi
    Let's call an end to this competition, okay?
[06:38] Elma
    Okay.
[06:39] Kobayashi
    I'm glad you were concerned for me.
[06:42] Kobayashi
    Thank you, Elma.
[06:44] Elma
    Yeah.
[06:45] Kobayashi
    Ahh, all done, all done.
[06:47] Kobayashi
    Okay, Elma!
[06:49] Kobayashi
    I'm taking you out for drinks with us today.
[06:51] Elma
    Drinks?
[06:52] Kobayashi
    Takiya-kun's already standing
    by at our usual place.
[06:56] Elma
    I bet it'll be fun to drink with everyone.
[06:58] Kobayashi
    Uh-huh. There are some things you can
    only talk about when liquored up, too.
[07:02] Elma
    Oh?! Now I'm excited!
[07:04] Kobayashi
    And what's with that outfit?!
[07:07] Kobayashi
    You dragons piss me off,
    always dressing like you can do anything!
[07:10] Takiya
    I think this idea that you can
    just wear glasses is thoughtless!
[07:14] Kobayashi
    Also, your breasts are outrageous!
[07:16] Takiya
    As a fellow glasses wearer, there are
    big differences in size and frames!
[07:19] Takiya
    If you're going to wear them,
    I wish you'd think about those things first!
[07:21] Elma
    I want to go home.
[07:27] Takiya
    This is a popular collaboration cafe!
[07:29] Background
    Here we go! Palflash!
[07:29] Takiya
    We're lucky it's emptier on weekdays.
[07:33] Fafnir
    Yeah.
[07:34] Staff
    Sorry for the wait.
[07:36] Staff
    Here's the special bonus
    illustrated coaster you ordered.
[07:39] Takiya
    There are 15 types, handed out at random.
[07:42] Takiya
    You're in this with me
    until I collect them all!
[07:45] Fafnir
    Hmph, bring it on.
SIGN    Urgent Notice
SIGN    Beware Suspicious Person
SIGN    Lately we've received several reports
     of a suspicious individual.
SIGN    >Dressed Entirely In Black, Long Hair
[07:51] Kobayashi
    That's scary.
[07:53] Kobayashi
    They're recruiting people for patrols.
[07:54] Tohru
    They actually approached me, too.
[07:57] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[07:57] Tohru
    They were hopeful after the skill
[07:59] Tohru
    I showed catching that thief in the
    shopping district a while back.
[08:01] Kobayashi
    Oh, yeah. That did happen.
[08:06] Kobayashi
    Will this be okay?
[08:08] Tohru
    Oh! You're worried for me?
[08:11] Kobayashi
    No, for the suspicious person.
[08:12] Tohru
    Goddammit!
[08:14] Sasakibe
    Thanks for coming today, Tohru-chan.
[08:17] Sasakibe
    It's unusual to see you in casual clothes.
[08:20] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi said I should
    wear some from time to time.
SIGN    Patrol
[08:23] Tohru
    So, what should I be doing?
[08:26] Sasakibe
    Just walk around the area and see
    if you spot anything strange.
[08:30] Sasakibe
    It's a little scary, though.
[08:32] Tohru
    There's nothing that scares me.
[08:35] Tohru
    In fact, please fear me!
[08:37] Sasakibe
    My, how cute.
[08:39] Tohru
    Miss Sasakibe, do you know any martial arts?
[08:41] Sasakibe
    Not at all.
[08:43] Tohru
    You'll be a hindrance
    if anything does happen, then.
[08:47] Sasakibe
    Nothing is going to happen.
[08:50] Sasakibe
    This town is very safe.
[08:53] Sasakibe
    A red zone right away?!
[08:55] Sasakibe
    Why today, of all days?!
[08:57] Tohru
    Miss Sasakibe, Miss Sasakibe.
[09:00] Sasakibe
    Yes?
[09:01] Tohru
    They're blocking the street
    and getting in the way, right?
[09:03] Tohru
    Let's go warn them.
[09:04] Sasakibe
    Huh? But—
[09:06] Tohru
    Hey!
[09:07] Tohru
    You're being a nuisance if you loiter there!
[09:10] Delinquent
    What?
[09:12] Delinquent
    You got a problem with us?
[09:14] Tohru
    I do.
[09:16] Tohru
    Are you some species that
    can't understand language?
[09:18] Delinquent
    Huh?!
[09:20] Delinquent
    Quit screwing with us!
[09:22] Delinquent
    You idiot!
[09:23] Delinquent
    He lashes out too fast!
SIGN    Pinky Forehead Flick
[09:30] Delinquents
    Huh?
[09:30] Tohru
    I'll only warn you one more time,
    so if you can't understand,
[09:34] Tohru
    well, give up hope.
[09:36] Tohru
    Get lost.
[09:38] Delinquent
    We'll make you regret picking
     a fight with Team Dragon Busters!
[09:43] Tohru
    Now that's an irritating team name.
[09:45] Tohru
    Well, let's refocus
    and get back to our patrol.
SIGN    Oborozuka Shopping District
[09:49] Sasakibe
    What will you do if they
    come back for revenge?
[09:51] Tohru
    Well, of course I'd—
SIGN    Bean Jam Pancake
SIGN    Bean Jam Pancake
[09:53] Elma
    Hmm?
[09:54] Tohru
    Suspicious person!
[09:55] Tohru
    This era's most suspicious person!
[09:57] Elma
    Wh-What?!
[09:58] Tohru
    You're skipping work, aren't you?!
[10:00] Elma
    I got out early today... Hmm?
[10:03] Elma
    What's that armband for?
SIGN    Patrol
[10:05] Tohru
    I'm on patrol to maintain the peace.
[10:08] Elma
    Huh?
[10:09] Elma
    You are?
[10:10] Elma
    You're doing something to
    preserve the peace of the city?
[10:13] Tohru
    I just said I am, didn't I?!
[10:19] Elma
    Really?!
[10:20] Elma
    You've finally found it for yourself?!
[10:22] Elma
    A sense of justice?!
[10:24] Tohru
    Huh?
[10:24] Elma
    I'm so happy!
[10:26] Elma
    From today on you can be
    an agent of harmony, too!
[10:28] Elma
    Allow me to help you with the patrol!
[10:30] Tohru
    I think she's misunderstanding
    something again.
[10:33] Sasakibe
    Oh, would you like to take my place, then?
[10:36] Tohru
    Miss Sasakibe?!
[10:37] Sasakibe
    You said I'd be a hindrance, remember?
[10:40] Elma
    I'm a bit more experienced
    at detecting evil.
[10:44] Elma
    Ask me anything you want.
[10:46] Tohru
    I'd like to know how I can get rid of you.
[10:48] Elma
    It's nothing to be embarrassed about.
[10:51] Elma
    You can be cute sometimes, too.
[10:53] Tohru
    So annoying.
[10:55] Tohru
    Besides, what do you consider evil, anyway?
[10:58] Tohru
    I'll overlook a bit of misconduct
    as long as it's not bothering others.
[11:03] Elma
    There was a book of laws, right?
[11:05] Elma
    If they do anything against those,
     we need to warn them.
[11:07] Boy
    Hurry!
[11:08] Boy
    It's going to turn red!
[11:11] Elma
    Hey!
[11:13] Elma
    That's a clear traffic violation!
SIGN    Enforcement Order For The Road Traffic Act
     Article 2
     Flashing Blue Light With Person Shaped Symbol
    
     Pedestrians shall not begin crossing the road,
    and pedestrians currently crossing the road
     must either quickly finish crossing or cease crossing
     and return to their starting side.
[11:15] Elma
    You could be fined up to 20,000 yen!
[11:17] Elma
    I'll punish you villains!
[11:20] Tohru
    Stop, stop.
[11:22] Tohru
    What are you doing to kids?
[11:24] Elma
    What?!
[11:24] Elma
    You're defending evil?!
[11:26] Elma
    You really are a chaos dragon!
[11:28] Tohru
    Calm down.
[11:29] Children
    I'm scared!
[11:29] Tohru
    If you're going to go after all those
    little things, I'm going home.
[11:30] Children
    
[11:32] Tohru
    And what was that about punishment?
[11:34] Tohru
    Violence is way worse, you know?
[11:37] Elma
    Tohru, you're starting to resemble
    Miss Kobayashi, aren't you?
[11:40] Tohru
    Huh?! Really?!
[11:42] Tohru
    Elma, you get it, don't you!
[11:44] Elma
    Annoying.
[11:46] Tohru
    You keep focusing on the little things
    because you're walking without purpose.
[11:49] Tohru
    Let's search for the suspicious person.
[11:51] Elma
    What are they like?
[11:53] Tohru
    According to the flier, the suspicious person
    was dressed entirely in black with long hair.
[11:57] Tohru
    Apparently he's also a tall man
    with sharp eyes and glasses.
[12:01] Elma
    Oh, that's pretty easy to understand.
[12:03] Tohru
    They said he was spotted dancing
     on the route to the elementary school.
[12:08] Elma
    I see. Like that, then?
SIGN    School Zone
[12:10] Tohru
    Yes, just like that.
[12:14] Tohru
    What's the meaning of this?
[12:17] Fafnir
    I was practicing the choreography
    for an event with Takiya.
[12:20] Tohru
    Why here?
[12:22] Fafnir
    Because our room's too small.
[12:24] Elma
    You're a fearsome dragon,
    so please show more prudence.
[12:29] Tohru
    She's right. Think about your persona.
[12:32] Fafnir
    And you two?
SIGN    Patrol
[12:33] Tohru
    We're on patrol.
[12:34] Fafnir
    Well, good work.
[12:36] Fafnir
    A chaos faction member and a harmony
    faction member happily together...
[12:40] Fafnir
    It would seem this world
    causes us to go crazy.
[12:43] Tohru
    And you're the one who's
    gone the craziest from it.
[12:46] Tohru
    Are you going to lecture me about
    being too influenced by it again?
[12:48] Fafnir
    No.
[12:50] Fafnir
    Lately I kind of understand, but...
[12:54] Fafnir
    I still think it's dangerous.
[12:57] Fafnir
    The common sense of this world
[12:59] Fafnir
    doesn't completely mesh
    with our understanding,
[13:02] Fafnir
    so never forget that.
[13:03] Tohru
    But isn't reconciling that kind of fun?
[13:07] Delinquent
    Found you!
[13:13] Delinquent
    You did us real good earlier, huh?
[13:17] Delinquent
    Looks like you're pretty capable,
[13:19] Delinquent
    but this time that guy's here.
[13:21] Delinquent
    The strongest local delinquent,
SIGN    Dragon
[13:23] Delinquent
    the Dragon of Destruction!
[13:25] Destruction
    A woman, huh?
[13:27] Destruction
    If you can fight,
    gender doesn't matter.
[13:30] Destruction
    But if you can't fight,
    hurry up and apologize.
[13:34] Destruction
    Oh, you'll fight?
[13:37] Destruction
    I won't show any mercy, then.
[13:40] Delinquents
    Get her, Ryuu-san!
[13:44] Delinquents
    Ryuu-san!
[13:46] Tohru
    Good grief, with this many...
[13:48] Tohru
    I'll get the clothes
    Miss Kobayashi gave me dirty.
[13:54] Delinquents
    Ryuu-san!
[13:55] Tohru
    I told you, didn't I?
[13:56] Tohru
    If you can't understand, give up hope.
[13:58] Delinquents
    Ryuu-san!
[13:59] Tohru
    I'll make sure you can
    never oppose me again.
[14:01] Delinquents
    Ryuu-san!
[14:06] Tohru
    Shut up!
[14:23] Delinquent
    Oh, hello, Tohru-san!
[14:25] Delinquent
    Hello!
[14:26] Tohru
    Hello.
[14:27] Kobayashi
    You're getting a lot of greetings today.
SIGN    B E A R
[14:35] Delinquent
    Ryuu-san, let's go home already.
[14:38] Destruction
    I won't just quietly stay defeated!
[14:41] Destruction
    I'll get stronger and have my revenge!
[14:43] Delinquent
    Ryuu-san!
[14:44] Delinquent
    I-It's a bear!
[14:49] Destruction
    Heh.
[14:49] Destruction
    Perfect.
[14:51] Destruction
    I'll show you I've gotten stronger!
[14:53] Delinquents
    Ryuu-san!
SIGN    Episode 4
SIGN    When in Rome, Do as the Romans Do (It's Hard to Match Others)
[15:01] Commercial
    Take, take, take me away somewhere,
[15:05] Commercial
    jump, jump, jump to Parkour Land!
[15:09] Kanna
    I want to go to an amusement park!
[15:12] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[15:13] Kobayashi
    I never did understand what was
    so fun about amusement parks.
[15:18] Kanna
    Mrr!
[15:20] Tohru
    Have you never been to one, Miss Kobayashi?
SIGN    Spot On
[15:23] Tohru
    If so, we can go and
    tell you what it's like.
[15:27] Kobayashi
    A dragon's going to teach me
    something about this world?
[15:30] Kobayashi
    No.
[15:32] Kobayashi
    Oh, well! I'll take you to one,
    since I know them so well!
[15:36] Kobayashi
    This is an exception, though!
[15:37] Kanna
    Yay!
[15:38] Kanna
    Can I invite Saikawa, too?
[15:39] Kobayashi
    Sure.
SIGN    Parkour Land
[15:42] Kobayashi
    We're here.
[15:44] Tohru
    What is this place?
[15:46] Tohru
    It's hard to believe we're
    still in the same country.
[15:48] Kobayashi
    Right? So this is the kind of place it is.
[15:50] Tohru
    Huh?!
[15:51] Kobayashi
    No, it's nothing!
[15:52] Georgie
    The unusual...
[15:54] Georgie
    The fact that you encounter things you
    can only find here creates memories,
[15:58] Georgie
    and the things you interact with
    let you forget your daily life.
[16:01] Tohru
    That voice!
[16:02] Kobayashi
    Georgie-sa— Huh?!
[16:04] Georgie
    Yes, I am your guide to
    this world of dreams.
[16:07] Georgie
    This too could be considered
    a type of a parlor maid.
[16:11] Kobayashi
    Isn't that too broad an interpretation?
[16:13] Kobayashi
    Part-time job?
[16:14] Georgie
    My father's acquaintance runs this park,
     so I'm helping him out.
[16:19] Georgie
    Oh, right, there's a cafe I think
    you'd like here in this area.
SIGN    Parkour Land Park Map
[16:24] Kobayashi
    Oh? We'll go try it.
[16:26] Georgie
    Hey! I'm Parkour Land's Acro!
[16:29] Kobayashi
    I can feel the passion.
[16:30] Georgie
    Have fun here today!
[16:33] Kanna
    Kobayashi, I'm going to go play
    with Saikawa and the others.
[16:36] Kobayashi
    All right.
[16:37] Kobayashi
    Meet back up at the Ferris wheel at four.
[16:42] Kobayashi
    Now, what shall we do?
[16:44] Tohru
    It's just the two of us
    adults now, isn't it?
[16:48] Tohru
    Why are you readying a security buzzer?
SIGN    Mirror House
[16:51] Tohru
    Wow, a room lined with mirrors, huh?
[16:54] Kobayashi
    There are so many reflections of me.
[16:57] Tohru
    What do they have all
    these mirrors here for?
[17:01] Kobayashi
    To reexamine and reevaluate yourself.
SIGN    Because it's a maze.
[17:04] Tohru
    I see.
[17:06] Tohru
    I have to accept that I'm
    in human form right now.
[17:11] Kobayashi
    I have to say, you're progressing
    rather quickly, Tohru.
[17:14] Tohru
    I can generally tell the way
    from the echoes of sound.
[17:17] Kobayashi
    You're like a bat.
[17:19] Georgie
    Curse you!
[17:23] Saikawa
    I'm scared of props!
[17:25] Kanna
    Calm down, Saikawa.
[17:27] Kanna
    I'll protect you.
SIGN    Haunted House
SIGN    Entrance
SIGN    Exit
[17:35] Kobayashi
    I know this one.
[17:36] Kobayashi
    You spin this here.
[17:38] Tohru
    Huh.
[17:41] Tohru
    What makes this fun?
[17:43] Kobayashi
    Uh, centrifugal force?
SIGN    Having some fun
[17:45] Tohru
    You mean humans try to experience
    a stronger rotational force
[17:50] Tohru
    to make themselves aware that they're
    under the sway of the planet's rotation?
[17:54] Kobayashi
    Centrifugal force and
    rotational force aren't—
[17:56] Kobayashi
    No, let's go with that!
[17:58] Kobayashi
    That!
[17:59] Tohru
    Let's go with that?
[18:01] Tohru
    Can I try spinning it, too?
[18:03] Kobayashi
    Go ahead.
[18:03] Tohru
    There!
[18:07] Kanna
    Oh!
[18:08] Ilulu
    What is this? How do you play with it?
[18:14] Kanna
    Oh!
[18:15] Ilulu
    What is this? It's fun!
[18:17] Kanna
    Spinning around.
[18:23] Saikawa
    Sorry, I did it again.
[18:26] Ilulu
    You're so funny, Saikawa.
[18:31] Georgie
    This, too, is a maid's duty.
[18:34] Tohru
    Unicorn, huh?
[18:36] Tohru
    He really loves virgins.
[18:39] Kobayashi
    Would he love me, too, then?
[18:41] Tohru
    Your virginity is mine, so he can't have it.
[18:44] Kobayashi
    Scary.
[18:45] Georgie
    Have some candy.
[18:48] Ilulu
    Lucky!
[18:49] Kanna
    Thank you.
[18:49] Saikawa
    Thank you so much.
[18:53] Kanna
    Saikawa, is yours yummy, too?
[18:55] Saikawa
    Yeah. Oh, sorry, though.
[18:57] Saikawa
    I ate all of it.
[19:00] Kanna
    That one tastes yummy, too.
[19:04] Ilulu
    Oh, she held it back.
[19:05] Saikawa
    I can do it when it counts!
[19:07] Ilulu
    Really?
[19:09] Kanna
    Me, too.
[19:16] Tohru
    That was fun!
[19:19] Kobayashi
    You sure complained quite a bit, though.
[19:21] Tohru
    As long as I'm with you,
[19:22] Tohru
    even the depths of the abyss where
    light never reaches would be fun!
[19:26] Kobayashi
    I wouldn't have fun there.
[19:28] Kobayashi
    Though, I suppose you're right about
    it being fun because we're together.
[19:33] Tohru
    You had fun, too, didn't you, Miss Kobayashi?
[19:37] Kobayashi
    The cafe Georgie-san mentioned
    should be around here.
[19:43] Tohru
    I know that.
[19:44] Tohru
    That's the Victorian style
    you mentioned once before.
[19:48] Tohru
    Ah!
[19:49] Tohru
    The best smile she's had at
    any place we went today?!
[19:52] Kobayashi
    Thank you.
[19:53] Kobayashi
    Thank you, Georgie-san.
[19:55] Kobayashi
    The taste is average.
[19:57] Kobayashi
    Who to drink it with, huh?
[19:59] Tohru
    You'll drink it with me, right?
SIGN    Parkour Land
[20:03] Ilulu
    Where are they?
[20:05] Kanna
    Saikawa, are you okay?
[20:07] Saikawa
    I-I'm fine.
[20:09] Saikawa
    I'm just a little too happy.
[20:12] Saikawa
    Georgie.
SIGN    Hot Dogs
SIGN    French Fries
[20:14] Georgie
    You young ladies look
    like you're having fun.
[20:17] Georgie
    I took very nice photos of you all.
[20:20] Kanna
    Oh, show me, show me!
[20:23] Ilulu
    Ah, Kobayashi, you're late!
[20:25] Kobayashi
    Sorry, sorry.
[20:27] Kobayashi
    I stayed there too long...
[20:28] Kobayashi
    Shall we all ride the Ferris wheel, then?
[20:35] Kobayashi
    Did Georgie-san take those photos?
[20:38] Kanna
    We all screamed and had fun.
[20:40] Ilulu
    I'd love to live in a place this fun.
[20:43] Kobayashi
    Sorry that my place is ordinary and boring.
[20:47] Kobayashi
    What's the matter, Tohru?
[20:48] Tohru
    Nothing, I've just been thinking.
[20:51] Tohru
    These rides make very sharp
    turns and rock up and down.
[20:55] Tohru
    Then there's the buildings
    with detailed designs
[20:57] Tohru
    and mascot costumes modeled
    after fantastical beasts.
[21:00] Kobayashi
    Is she feeling nostalgic?
[21:01] Tohru
    This...
[21:03] Tohru
    is a facility to simulate
    riding a dragon, isn't it?!
[21:06] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[21:07] Tohru
    I can't believe they'd make these things
    just because they can't ride dragons themselves.
[21:10] Tohru
    Humans are so despicable!
[21:12] Kobayashi
    How did you even jump
    to that interpretation?!
[21:15] Tohru
    In other words, if you rode me you could
    experience an amusement park every day!
[21:19] Kobayashi
    You only have roller coasters!
[21:22] Kobayashi
    Still, something like this
    every now and then isn't so bad.
[21:28] Kobayashi
    It is bad for my hips, though.
SIGN    Gi Na Ve Me N
[21:36] Classmate
    Nae.
[21:37] Classmate
    Nae?
[21:40] Classmate
    Georgie.
[21:42] Georgie
    Oh, yes.
[21:43] Georgie
    Good morning.
[21:45] Classmate
    You've forgotten your own name, haven't you?
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:21] Saikawa
    Kanna-san's Mom,
[23:23] Saikawa
    I brought the photos from
    the amusement park.
[23:24] Saikawa
    There's a thousand!
[23:25] Kobayashi
    That's a lot.
[23:26] Saikawa
    Really?
[23:27] Saikawa
    Let's select the best, then.
[23:28] Saikawa
    Going through each one.
[23:30] Kobayashi
    That's harsh.
[23:30] Kobayashi
    I got it, I'm sorry.
[23:31] Kobayashi
    They're all okay, then.
SIGN    Episode 5
SIGN    Together With You (Well, If We Get Along)
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Pisces
SIGN    You might make a big mistake making others mad
SIGN    Lucky Advice
    
    Repent.
    
    Also, skip sleep to study up.
SIGN    That's stoic...
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Pisces!

E5 - Together With You (Well, If We Get Along)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Oborozuka Shopping District
[00:06] Kobayashi
    Would you stop snarling at each
    other every time you meet?
[00:09] Tohru
    It's her fault for glaring at me!
[00:12] Elma
    What?! Fried tofu fritters are delicious!
[00:14] Kobayashi
    I guess there's no stopping it when you
    tried to kill each other the moment you met.
[00:20] Tohru
    Huh?
[00:21] Tohru
    No, we didn't try to kill
    each other at first.
[00:24] Elma
    That's right.
[00:25] Elma
    We didn't start that when we first met.
[00:27] Kobayashi
    What was your first meeting like, then?
[02:05] (Flashback) Man
    I heard there might be a civil war soon.
[02:08] (Flashback) Man
    Looks like it.
[02:09] (Flashback) Man
    The royal succession dispute
    is finally coming to a head.
[02:12] (Flashback) Man
    At this rate the neighboring country's
    going to capitalize on it.
[02:16] (Flashback) Tohru
    Hmm, humans are so foolish.
[02:19] (Flashback) Tohru
    Every time they open their mouths,
    it's about some conflict.
[02:19] Girl
    That's mine!
[02:21] Boy
    I found it first!
[02:22] (Flashback) Tohru
    Do they have no intention of
    enjoying their worthless lives?
[02:25] (Flashback) Man
    She's here!
[02:26] (Flashback) Man
    It's the priestess of the holy seas!
[02:28] (Flashback) Woman
    Priestess?
[02:29] (Flashback) Man
    She's come to our town, too!
[02:32] (Flashback) Woman
    Yes, now we're saved!
[02:35] Tohru
    Priestess of the holy seas?
[02:37] Tohru
    I've heard of her.
[02:38] Tohru
    Lately she's been intervening in
    human conflicts and resolving them.
[02:44] Tohru
    If the conflict is over water or food,
[02:46] Tohru
    she creates lakes and
    causes abundant harvests.
[02:50] Tohru
    If they clash, she makes them lose their
    will to fight with her miraculous power.
[02:53] Tohru
    She must be a god or something
    on par with them...
[02:57] Tohru
    Either way, it's against the rules for
    them to interfere in human society.
[03:06] Tohru
    Well, let's see what she's like.
[03:21] Tohru
    That woman!
[03:22] Tohru
    She's neither god nor divine messenger!
[03:25] Tohru
    Is she?
[03:26] Tohru
    But if that's the case,
    is she just fooling around?!
[03:38] (Flashback) Tohru
    What do you think you're doing?
[03:40] (Flashback) Tohru
    A dragon acting as a miraculous priestess?
[03:43] (Flashback) Tohru
    You make me laugh.
[03:44] (Flashback) Elma
    I could ask you the same thing.
[03:47] (Flashback) Elma
    What is the Emperor of Demise's
    daughter doing in a human village?
[03:51] (Flashback) Elma
    Your name is Tohru, if I remember right?
[03:55] (Flashback) Elma
    I just believe that humans
    shouldn't fight each other,
[03:59] (Flashback) Elma
    and it's foolish to spill unnecessary blood.
[04:02] (Flashback) Elma
    I have the power to stop that, so I do.
[04:05] (Flashback) Tohru
    So you're actually doing work,
     unlike the other lazy harmony dragons.
[04:11] (Flashback) Tohru
    I bet you've had quite a few
    human sacrifices offered to you.
[04:14] (Flashback) Elma
    I don't need any human sacrifices.
[04:17] (Flashback) Tohru
    What? Why not?
[04:19] (Flashback) Elma
    Why would anyone say
    humans are tasty to eat?
[04:23] (Flashback) Elma
    I'm sure there are much tastier
    things in this world.
[04:27] (Flashback) Elma
    It's my belief that humans
    will create them.
[04:31] Tohru
    I see.
[04:32] Tohru
    She's the oddball Quetzalcoatl mentioned.
[04:35] (Flashback) Tohru
    Are you Elma, then?
[04:37] (Flashback) Tohru
    So what, you ask for food in return?
[04:41] (Flashback) Tohru
    You sure you aren't better
    suited to the chaos faction?
[04:44] (Flashback) Elma
    You sound like a bit of an oddball yourself.
[04:48] (Flashback) Elma
    None of the chaos dragons I've met thus far
    were willing to engage in conversation.
[04:55] (Flashback) Tohru
    I just slotted the act of judging
    you in before destroying you.
[04:59] (Flashback) Elma
    Judging me, huh?
[05:02] (Flashback) Elma
    Would you like to accompany
     me for a while, then?
[05:05] (Flashback) Tohru
    What?
[05:08] (Flashback) Elma
    Let's both judge the world
    of humans together.
[05:14] Kobayashi
    So you two traveled together for a while?
[05:17] Tohru
    Yes, well...
[05:19] Tohru
    I went along with her
    self-righteousness for a bit.
[05:22] Elma
    I must have been crazy at the time.
[05:25] Kobayashi
    So you were both feeling
    each other out, then?
[05:29] Kobayashi
    Going around without pushing too hard as
    two people with different value sets.
[05:34] Tohru
    I guess you could say that?
[05:37] Tohru
    I was more interested in Elma
[05:40] Tohru
    than the goals of our species,
     since she was doing as she pleased.
[05:45] Tohru
    At least, I think that's
    how it was at the time.
[05:47] Kobayashi
    Mhmm. So then what?
[05:49] Tohru
    It's simple.
[05:51] Tohru
    We came to understand one another, so...
[05:53] Elma
    We couldn't see eye to eye,
    so after a few decades naturally we...
[05:57] Both
    tried to kill each other.
[06:00] Kobayashi
    That's not natural at all.
[06:09] (Flashback) Elma
    Why?!
[06:10] (Flashback) Elma
    Why did you destroy the palace?!
[06:13] (Flashback) Elma
    This was supposed to be a symbol of peace!
[06:16] (Flashback) Tohru
    Peace, huh?
[06:18] (Flashback) Tohru
    The thought of a peace
    requiring you gave me the chills.
[06:21] (Flashback) Elma
    What?!
[06:23] (Flashback) Tohru
    This palace was erected
    to worship you as a god.
[06:29] (Flashback) Tohru
    From it, a religion centered
    around you took root
[06:31] (Flashback) Tohru
    and adopted a class-based
    society full of disparity.
[06:36] (Flashback) Tohru
    In time there would come to be conflict
    with those who refused to accept you.
[06:42] (Flashback) Elma
    I would have forbidden that!
[06:44] (Flashback) Tohru
    You're not listening to
    what I'm trying to say.
[06:47] (Flashback) Tohru
    Did you intend to remain here with
    these humans for all eternity?
[06:52] (Flashback) Tohru
    Granting the desires of others and
    acting as a symbol of worship forever?
[06:58] (Flashback) Tohru
    I'm asking you if you wanted to let yourself
    get dragged into those humans' framework
[07:02] (Flashback) Tohru
    when you thought were
    operating under your own.
[07:08] (Flashback) Tohru
    You've diverged from your
    original intentions, Elma!
[07:11] (Flashback) Tohru
    I'm disappointed in you!
[07:13] (Flashback) Tohru
    I can't stand how disgraceful you've become.
[07:15] (Flashback) Tohru
    So I'll kill you and wake those
    humans from their dream.
[07:18] (Flashback) Elma
    Now you've said it!
[07:20] (Flashback) Elma
    Try to kill me, if you can!
[07:27] (Flashback) Elma
    I knew it, too, you know.
[07:29] (Flashback) Elma
    This wasn't going in a good direction.
[07:32] (Flashback) Elma
    But what else could I do?
[07:34] (Flashback) Elma
    The food they brought me
    was just so delicious!
[07:45] Elma
    She's...!
[07:48] Tohru
    She's...!
[07:49] Both
    Strong!
[08:11] Tohru
    That was how we conclusively broke apart.
[08:16] Kobayashi
    That sounds both grand and petty.
[08:19] Elma
    In the end, I returned
     to the harmony faction's base
[08:24] Elma
    and didn't get involved with humans again.
[08:26] Kobayashi
    So you two got along so well,
     you could fight.
[08:29] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, did you listen
    to any of our story just now?
[08:32] Elma
    She's right, Miss Kobayashi!
[08:33] Elma
    We're completely at odds with each other!
[08:35] Kobayashi
    Really?
[08:37] Kobayashi
    Tohru's been docile here,
[08:40] Kobayashi
    and you have your hands too full
    with work to try to lead humanity.
[08:44] Kobayashi
    Wouldn't that mean you have
    no reason to fight here?
[08:48] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi?
[08:50] Tohru
    Do you not understand why
    things are like that here?
[08:53] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[08:54] Elma
    Because the food here's delicious!
[08:56] Elma
    Both Tohru and I are gluttons!
[08:59] Tohru
    I really won't ever get along with you!
[09:01] Elma
    What's that?!
[09:02] Tohru
    You're always easily enticed by food!
[09:04] Elma
    But tasting human culture is the
    best way to understand humans!
[09:08] Tohru
    You just want to stuff your face!
[09:11] Elma
    You're totally hooked
    on human food yourself!
[09:14] Kobayashi
    They're so close they understand
    each other's inner thoughts,
[09:14] Elma
    Day after day, you're cooking food!
[09:16] Elma
    Never tiring of it,
    always in your maid outfit!
[09:17] Tohru
    You're always in your office attire,
    even on your days off, too!
[09:18] Kobayashi
    and they fight to shave away
    the parts they can't accept.
[09:21] Elma
    Don't act like that's the same as
    your unnatural appearance!
[09:23] Tohru
    This is natural for me!
[09:23] Kobayashi
    I always wanted friends like that myself.
[09:25] Elma
    How is that natural?!
SIGN    Together With You (Well, If We Get Along)
SIGN    Episode 5
SIGN    Potato Chips
SIGN    Maid in Love
[10:33] Tohru
    I'll kill you.
[10:35] Ilulu
    Huh?!
[10:37] Tohru
    Day after day you laze about!
[10:38] Tohru
    Why don't you go work a bit?!
[10:41] Ilulu
    I've been thinking about my future.
[10:43] Ilulu
    Just give me another century.
[10:44] Tohru
    Don't think about it on a dragon's scale!
[10:48] Ilulu
    I'll help you with your work for now, then.
[10:51] Tohru
    What?!
[10:53] Tohru
    There's no way you could
    handle the work of a maid!
[10:56] Tohru
    Please don't underestimate maids!
[10:57] Ilulu
    That's what Kobayashi is
    always saying to you.
[11:00] Ilulu
    Though... Work, huh?
[11:02] Ilulu
    Kobayashi does that, right?
[11:04] Tohru
    That's right.
[11:05] Tohru
    She's earning money for your food costs, too.
[11:08] Ilulu
    All right, I'll work.
[11:10] Ilulu
    At the same place as Kobayashi, then.
[11:12] Tohru
    I'll erase you!
[11:14] Ilulu
    What? You're scaring me.
[11:15] Tohru
    I'll erase Elma, too!
[11:17] Ilulu
    Why are you bringing Elma up?
[11:18] Elma
    Achoo!
[11:21] Tohru
    Would you like to search for a
    place that'll employ you, then?
[11:23] Tohru
    Using our PC or reading the classifieds?
[11:26] Ilulu
    No, I'll look and decide for myself.
[11:29] Tohru
    Hmph.
SIGN    Oborozuka Shopping District
[11:31] Tohru
    Shall we go look around?
SIGN    Oborozuka Shopping District, Full of Smiles Every Day
SIGN    Shop at Your Local Shopping District!
[11:33] Ilulu
    It's my first time passing through here.
[11:35] Ilulu
    I always went over the roofs.
[11:37] Tohru
    You're like a cat.
[11:40] Tohru
    Are you sure you wouldn't better
    off living in the wild?
SIGN    Clothes Shop
SIGN    Tendon
[11:42] Tohru
    Well, I will admit that you have
    been putting in effort lately.
[11:46] Tohru
    You did learn perception blocking...
[11:49] Tohru
    And at some point you managed
    to form proper hands.
SIGN    Pork Cutlet
[11:53] Tohru
    You have worked hard.
[11:54] Ilulu
    I kind of like you like this.
[11:57] Ilulu
    I like you.
[11:58] Tohru
    Hmph, don't say such things so suddenly.
SIGN    - Cleaning
SIGN    Save with bulk! T-Shirts Dress Shirts Suits Special Price
[12:01] Ilulu
    But I still like Kobayashi the most.
[12:03] Tohru
    Why, you...!
[12:04] Tohru
    Jeez, come on, come on.
[12:06] Tohru
    Have you found something
    you'd like to try doing?
[12:08] Ilulu
    Hmm...
SIGN    Sauces Pork Cutlet Vegetable Other
SIGN    Hamburger
SIGN    Vegetable Croquettes Cream Croquettes
SIGN    Beef Cutlet
SIGN    Tax Included
SIGN    Freshly-Made Croquettes
[12:11] Ilulu
    Meat and fish make me want to devour them.
SIGN    High-Grade Beef Rib Roast
[12:13] Tohru
    As expected from a fellow chaos dragon.
[12:15] Ilulu
    Flowers make me want to trample them.
SIGN    Flower Arrangements Currently 10% Off!
SIGN    Roses 300 Yen Each
SIGN    Tulips 250 Yen Each
[12:17] Tohru
    It is our destiny to destroy.
[12:19] Ilulu
    Books make me want to burn them.
[12:21] Tohru
    Classic chaos dragon!
SIGN    Good Conversational Skills
SIGN    Expressive Writing
SIGN    Become an AI
SIGN    Train Your Body
[12:23] Tohru
    It's forbidden to do all
    those things here, though.
[12:25] Ilulu
    Right...
[12:27] Ilulu
    I hate those kinds of instinctual things.
[12:30] Tohru
    Well, we're here because we denied them.
[12:33] Ilulu
    You can do that?
[12:35] Tohru
    Of course!
[12:36] Tohru
    That means there's nowhere
     you can work, though.
[12:38] Ilulu
    Hey! Let's play!
[12:42] Kaneshiro
    Sure, let's play!
[12:43] Kirishima
    Want to go together?
[12:45] Ilulu
    Go where?
[12:46] Kaneshiro
    Shopping!
[12:47] Ilulu
    Let's go!
[12:48] Kirishima
    Over there!
[12:51] Boy
    Yeah!
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[12:52] Boy
    Close.
[12:52] Kaneshiro
    Yoohoo! Kanna-chan, Saikawa-san!
[12:55] Saikawa
    Oh, you're here.
[12:56] Kanna
    Lady Tohru, Ilulu.
[12:58] Saikawa
    Huh? What brings you here?
[13:01] Tohru
    That's my question. Why are you here?
[13:03] Kanna
    This is our hangout.
SIGN    Oboro Shop
[13:06] Kirishima
    So these ladies are friends
    of yours, Kanna-chan?
[13:09] Tohru
    I'm Tohru.
[13:10] Tohru
    This is Ilulu.
[13:12] Tohru
    We were searching for a
    part-time job, but...
[13:19] Girl
    Which should we get?
[13:20] Both
    They all taste the same.
[13:22] Boy
    All right!
[13:23] Kirishima
    Kanna-chan, this would look good on you.
[13:25] Kaneshiro
    You, too, Saikawa-san.
[13:31] Kanna
    We match.
[13:34] Aida
    I haven't seen you before.
[13:36] Aida
    Are you the maid's little sister?
[13:38] Tohru
    So this is your shop, Ms. Aida?
[13:41] Tohru
    Ilulu, this is Ms. Aida.
[13:44] Tohru
    We've met often at the
    neighborhood association meetings.
[13:47] Tohru
    Oh, what happened to your leg?
[13:50] Aida
    Oh, I messed it up while jogging.
[13:53] Aida
    I'm getting old now, so I've been
    thinking of closing up shop.
[13:56] Three
    No way!
[13:59] Aida
    But as you can see, I just can't.
[14:03] Ilulu
    There are a lot of kids here.
[14:05] Aida
    That's because we're a candy shop.
[14:07] Aida
    Different children have been
    coming here for decades now.
[14:12] Ilulu
    Could I work here?!
[14:15] Aida
    How old are you?
[14:17] Tohru
    She's the same age as me.
[14:18] Aida
    The same as you?
[14:20] Aida
    Hmm, what should I do?
[14:23] Aida
    I was thinking of letting
    my grandson run the shop,
[14:26] Aida
    but I guess it would be
    better to have someone
[14:28] Aida
    enthusiastic about it than
    someone reluctant to do it.
[14:31] Tohru
    I would ask you to let her, as well.
[14:46] Aida
    Okay!
[14:47] Kobayashi
    Huh.
[14:48] Kobayashi
    Working part time at a candy store, huh?
[14:50] Kanna
    It's Oboro Shop.
[14:52] Kanna
    Do you know about it, Kobayashi?
[14:54] Kobayashi
    It's at the end of the
    shopping district, right?
[14:57] Tohru
    She got hired thanks to
    my voice of authority.
[15:01] Ilulu
    She displayed firm command
    of her emotions,
[15:03] Ilulu
    and I thought she was terrifying.
[15:05] Tohru
    Praise me more.
[15:06] Kobayashi
    Is that really praise?
[15:11] Ilulu
    Will it all be okay?
[15:16] Kobayashi
    Worried?
[15:18] Kobayashi
    You chose it because you were
    interested in it, right?
[15:28] Kobayashi
    I started my job with vague feelings
     and found things that made it fulfilling, too.
[15:33] Kobayashi
    So I think that's a fine way to start work.
[15:38] Ilulu
    I see.
[15:41] Tohru
    I'm a maid because I was interested in it,
     too, and it's very fulfilling!
[15:44] Tohru
    So pet me!
[15:46] Kobayashi
    Ilulu.
[15:48] Kobayashi
    Make sure you listen to others
    and learn your tasks properly.
[15:52] Kobayashi
    Don't let yourself be like this maid.
[15:56] Tohru
    M-Miss Kobayashi!
[16:29] Tohru
    Hmph.
[16:34] Friend
    What's wrong, Take?
[16:35] Taketo
    My grandma hurt her leg.
[16:38] Friend
    So you're stuck helping out?
[16:40] Taketo
    No. Apparently she hired someone, so she just
    asked me to support them to start.
SIGN    Aida Taketo
[16:45] Friend
    Huh. That stubborn old woman hired
    someone outside the family.
[16:48] Taketo
    I'm taking a uniform over today,
[16:52] Taketo
    but get a look at this.
[16:54] Taketo
    It's sized for an adult man.
[16:56] Friend
    So she hired a guy?
[16:59] Taketo
    I have no idea where she met him.
[17:01] Taketo
    If he's some weirdo, I'm chasing him out.
[17:03] Friend
    So cool, Taketo-kun.
[17:05] Taketo
    Shut up.
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[17:07] Taketo
    Jeez.
[17:07] Taketo
    What the heck are they like?
[17:10] Ilulu
    Welcome.
[17:12] Taketo
    A-Adult size!
[17:13] Taketo
    Crazy!
[17:16] Ilulu
    Aida's grandson?
[17:18] Taketo
    I'm Aida Taketo.
[17:20] Ilulu
    I'm Ilulu. I'm 16.
[17:22] Ilulu
    That's what we're telling people.
[17:24] Taketo
    The same age?
[17:25] Taketo
    Going by the name... you're a foreigner?
[17:28] Taketo
    How'd you meet Grandma?
[17:30] Ilulu
    I met her here,
[17:31] Ilulu
    asked her to let me work,
     and she hired me.
[17:33] Taketo
    That was decided way too easily.
[17:36] Taketo
    This is suspicious.
[17:37] Taketo
    She has to have some ulterior motive for
    suddenly wanting to work here like this.
[17:40] Ilulu
    So, what are you here for?
[17:42] Taketo
    Oh, yeah, your uniform.
[17:45] Taketo
    An apron and a white shirt.
[17:46] Ilulu
    Stuff to wear?
[17:48] Ilulu
    Got it.
[17:49] Taketo
    Pfft!
[17:50] Taketo
    Hey! A pervert?! Are you a pervert?!
[17:53] Ilulu
    Oh, right.
[17:54] Ilulu
    Shame.
[17:55] Ilulu
    I forgot.
[17:56] Ilulu
    Naughty boy.
[17:57] Taketo
    Don't act ashamed while
    rolling up your shirt!
[18:00] Taketo
    Go change in back! In back!
[18:01] Ilulu
    Oh, that's how it is.
[18:04] Taketo
    What was that?
[18:05] Taketo
    Does she come from a country
    with that kind of culture?
[18:07] Taketo
    I want to go there!
[18:08] Ilulu
    Hey, Taketo?
[18:10] Taketo
    Just Take's fine.
[18:12] Taketo
    What's wrong?
[18:13] Ilulu
    I can't get the buttons on this closed.
[18:16] Taketo
    Y-You'll be fine like that.
[18:18] Ilulu
    Okay, then.
[18:20] Ilulu
    You're a pervert, aren't you?
[18:21] Taketo
    Huh?! What are you saying?!
[18:23] Ilulu
    You're staring.
[18:24] Taketo
    I-I'm not staring!
[18:27] Taketo
    I'll be back here, so ask if there's
    anything you don't understand.
[18:33] Taketo
    She's a weirdo in a different way!
[18:37] Taketo
    I'm surprised Grandma decided
    to hire such a mysterious person.
[18:41] Taketo
    She makes way less sense than someone
    with ulterior motives and it's scary.
[18:45] Taketo
    Can she even do the work?
[18:47] Boy
    This please.
[18:48] Ilulu
    Sure thing.
[18:49] Girl
    Give me that one.
[18:51] Ilulu
    This one?
[18:52] Girl
    Yeah.
SIGN    Water Balloons
[18:53] Ilulu
    Do we sell these individually?
[18:55] Taketo
    Yeah, that's right.
SIGN    Lucky
[18:58] Taketo
    She's actually trying to do an honest job.
[18:59] Boy
    Yay!
[19:01] Taketo
    Wait. Even more so than I would, huh?
[19:04] Taketo
    Is that why Grandma hired her?
[19:04] Girl
    Wow! Why do you have such big breasts?
[19:08] Taketo
    Whoa! An elementary schooler's blazing
    fastball of innocent sexual harassment!
[19:10] Taketo
    How will you divert it?
[19:11] Ilulu
    These are my flame sacs.
     They're big so they can hold fire.
[19:15] Girl
    I see.
[19:16] Taketo
    What kind of nonsense deflection is that?!
[19:19] Girl
    Are they heavy?
[19:20] Girl
    Do they make your shoulders stiff?
[19:22] Ilulu
    Hmm, would you like to hold them?
[19:25] Taketo
    Wait! Wait! Wait!
[19:26] Taketo
    Hey, don't do anything weird!
[19:34] Ilulu
    Are you okay, Take?
[19:37] Taketo
    S-S-Sorry!
[19:39] Ilulu
    Oh, right.
[19:41] Ilulu
    Naughty boy.
[19:43] Taketo
    Why's your reaction so delayed?!
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[19:46] Girl
    Bye-bye!
[19:48] Girl
    Goodbye!
[19:49] Ilulu
    Later!
[19:57] Ilulu
    You know,
[19:58] Ilulu
    I like kids.
[20:00] Ilulu
    I like playing with them.
[20:03] Ilulu
    But I can't play while I'm working.
[20:06] Ilulu
    So I wanted to work somewhere
    where children have fun.
[20:15] Taketo
    It's time to close up shop.
[20:18] Ilulu
    Yeah.
[20:19] Taketo
    Want to play for a bit?
[20:20] Taketo
    I'll show you how to spin the top.
[20:23] Ilulu
    Oh, that thing!
[20:24] Ilulu
    Teach me! Teach me!
[20:25] Ilulu
    I'll bring it over!
[20:27] Taketo
    She's a nice girl.
[20:29] Taketo
    Looks like I won't have
    to worry about Grandma.
[20:32] Ilulu
    Take, I like you.
[20:34] Taketo
    What? That's my line.
[20:36] Ilulu
    Second to Kobayashi.
[20:38] Taketo
    Who's Kobayashi?
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[20:41] Ilulu
    I brought it.
[20:43] Taketo
    Watch closely.
[20:51] (Flashback) Elma
    Did you know?
[20:52] (Flashback) Elma
    Apparently humans make wishes on stars.
[20:56] (Flashback) Tohru
    Huh?
[20:58] (Flashback) Elma
    Apparently they pray to stars for peace,
[21:00] (Flashback) Elma
    bountiful harvests, and happiness
    for themselves and their families.
[21:05] (Flashback) Tohru
    So they don't care who grants their wishes,
     as long as they're granted?
[21:10] (Flashback) Tohru
    What an utterly inferior species.
[21:13] (Flashback) Elma
    What would you wish for?
[21:15] (Flashback) Elma
    If your wish could come true.
[21:21] (Flashback) Tohru
    Nothing, really.
[21:26] (Flashback) Elma
    As for me...
[21:27] (Flashback) Tohru
    You'd probably just wish for lots
    of delicious food to eat, right?
[21:31] (Flashback) Elma
    You know me well, don't you?
[21:34] (Flashback) Elma
    But that's not all.
[21:37] (Flashback) Tohru
    What then?
[21:38] (Flashback) Elma
    I'd wish for your share
    of delicious food, too.
[21:46] (Flashback) Tohru
    Have it your way.
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:20] Elma
    Our lunch break is too short!
[23:23] Elma
    Don't you agree, Miss Kobayashi?!
[23:25] Kobayashi
    You think so?
[23:26] Elma
    Lately there's five places
    I want to visit for lunch,
[23:29] Elma
    but I can only hit two of them!
[23:31] Kobayashi
    Normal people wouldn't go
     to multiple places!
SIGN    Episode 6
SIGN    Uncanny Relationships (One Side Is a Dragon)
[23:32] Elma
    I'm hungry!
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Capricorn
SIGN    You might get tired from heavy breasts
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    It helps to rest them on your desk.
SIGN    I'm glad mine are small.
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Capricorn.

E6 - Uncanny Relationships (One Side Is a Dragon)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:09] Shouta
    What are you doing?!
[00:11] Lucoa
    You looked cold, so I thought
    I'd be a blanket for you.
[00:14] Lucoa
    Since I am your familiar.
[00:16] Shouta
    I don't need that!
[00:20] Shouta
    It's been like this ever
    since Lucoa came here.
[00:23] Shouta
    Whenever I'm home, she's glued to me.
[00:25] Shouta
    I'm a man, too, you know!
[00:30] Shouta
    All right!
[00:31] Shouta
    I have to take back control!
[00:34] Shouta
    I'll teach her who's boss!
[02:19] Shouta
    I'll uncover her weakness.
[02:21] Lucoa
    Now, then.
[02:26] Lucoa
    Being naked really is the most comfortable.
[02:29] Shouta
    What is she doing?!
[02:31] Lucoa
    Ah, I really do hate clothes.
[02:35] Lucoa
    That sure is a shortcoming.
[02:38] Shouta
    Lucoa, Lucoa.
[02:40] Lucoa
    Hmm?
[02:41] Lucoa
    What is it, Shouta-kun?
[02:43] Shouta
    Here, take this!
[02:44] Lucoa
    Huh?
[02:45] Shouta
    Your master commands you!
[02:47] Shouta
    Wear those clothes!
[02:48] Shouta
    Now, feel uncomfortable
    and weep for it to end!
[02:52] Lucoa
    I tried it on.
[02:55] Lucoa
    Thank you for the present.
[02:58] Shouta
    Shit. Onto something else.
[03:01] Shouta
    How will she handle something bitter?
SIGN    Black Coffee
[03:04] Lucoa
    Thank you.
[03:07] Shouta
    I'm the one who can't stand that!
[03:11] Shouta
    What about our neighbor's scary dog?
[03:16] Shouta
    Again, I'm the one who's scared of that!
[03:20] Shouta
    I'm going to be the greatest mage.
[03:24] Shouta
    I have to have perfect
    control over my familiar.
[03:27] Shouta
    I'm sorry!
[03:31] Kobayashi
    Lucoa-san's weaknesses?
[03:33] Shouta
    Yeah.
[03:34] Tohru
    In that case, I know something good.
[03:36] Shouta
    Really?
[03:37] Tohru
    Her weakness is those breasts of hers!
[03:39] Tohru
    It's hard for her dodge attacks with those.
[03:42] Shouta
    I don't mean combat weaknesses!
[03:44] Tohru
    Hmm, in that case, probably liquor.
[03:46] Shouta
    Liquor?
[03:48] Kobayashi
    Didn't Lucoa-san say she
    could hold her liquor well?
[03:51] Tohru
    Well, she can hold her alcohol well.
[03:54] Tohru
    But it's not that. It's that
    she's a sucker for liquor.
[03:57] Tohru
    She's usually well guarded, but she'll
    drink liquor without caution.
[04:02] Tohru
    So, if you put poison or such in liquor,
     she won't even notice.
[04:04] Shouta
    That would kill her, though!
[04:06] Kobayashi
    You're asking about weaknesses,
[04:08] Kobayashi
    but from a dragon's point of view we
    humans are just full of weaknesses.
[04:12] Kobayashi
    Even if you manage to get something over her,
    do you think that would sway Lucoa-san?
[04:17] Kobayashi
    Isn't your current
    relationship good enough?
[04:20] Shouta
    It's not.
[04:21] Shouta
    Lucoa...
[04:23] Shouta
    she's always wandering around somewhere,
[04:25] Shouta
    or teasing me,
[04:27] Shouta
    or making fun of me.
[04:29] Shouta
    She doesn't respect me.
[04:31] Shouta
    That's why I want to strike
    at one of her weaknesses
[04:34] Shouta
    and prove myself to her.
[04:36] Tohru
    I believe she already respects you, though.
[04:39] Shouta
    Huh?
[04:40] Tohru
    Miss Lucoa was never the type
    to stay in one place for very long.
[04:44] Tohru
    The fact that she's still with
    you means she does like you.
[04:47] Lucoa
    Huh? Shouta-kun?
[04:49] Lucoa
    You were here?
[04:50] Shouta
    H-How long have you been here?!
[04:52] Lucoa
    I just arrived.
[04:56] Shouta
    I-I'm going home.
[05:00] Lucoa
    I'll escort you, then.
[05:02] Kobayashi
    Nice seeing you.
[05:10] Lucoa
    I would have told you
     my weakness if you just asked.
[05:14] Shouta
    Huh?
[05:15] Lucoa
    The thing I hate most is losing a home.
[05:20] Lucoa
    I once made a huge mistake, you know.
[05:23] Lucoa
    So I was driven out of my homeland.
[05:25] Lucoa
    It made me very sad.
[05:28] Lucoa
    Ever since then, I've been
    afraid of settling in one place.
[05:32] Lucoa
    But then a friend I thought
    would never have a home
[05:36] Lucoa
    found one for herself.
[05:38] Lucoa
    It made me kind of jealous.
[05:40] Shouta
    So that's why you came to me?
[05:43] Shouta
    But... why me?
[05:45] Lucoa
    You're the one who said it, you know.
[05:47] Lucoa
    You asked me to be here with you.
[05:49] Lucoa
    I was so happy to hear that.
[05:52] Shouta
    But that was as a familiar...
[05:57] Shouta
    To be honest, I already know.
[05:59] Shouta
    You're an incredible being and I'm not
    a good match for you, as immature as I am.
[06:04] Lucoa
    That's right.
[06:06] Lucoa
    I am an incredible familiar,
     so I understood you at first glance.
[06:12] Lucoa
    You're a good boy who's kind and trying hard,
     even if you're overextending yourself.
[06:17] Lucoa
    Knowing that was good enough for me.
[06:21] Shouta
    Thank you.
[06:24] Lucoa
    Good boy.
[06:27] Shouta
    I do wish she'd stop treating
    me like a child, though.
[06:35] Lucoa
    Shouta-kun,
[06:37] Lucoa
    I'm willing whenever you want it, okay?
[06:40] Shouta
    Wh-What do you mean by that?!
[06:46] Kobayashi
    What's the matter?
[06:47] Kobayashi
    It's unusual for you to sigh like that.
[06:49] Takiya
    Well, my parents are paying
    a visit to my place.
[06:53] Kobayashi
    Huh?! Then Fafnir-san has to...
[06:55] Takiya
    Yeah.
[06:56] Takiya
    I asked him to go adventure in the mountains
    or something while they're here, but...
[07:01] (Flashback) Fafnir
    I absolutely refuse!
[07:03] Takiya
    A new, hardcore game is
    releasing at the same time.
[07:08] Kobayashi
    Then you'll just have to introduce them.
[07:10] Takiya
    Right.
[07:11] Takiya
    Both of my parents are pretty forward,
[07:13] Takiya
    so the thought of them angering Faf-kun
[07:15] Takiya
    and watching my goods get
    half-destroyed is... ahh!
[07:18] Kobayashi
    You're worried about your otaku collection?!
[07:21] Fafnir
    I refuse.
[07:22] Fafnir
    I can't afford to move from this spot
    until I've collected all the treasures.
[07:27] Takiya
    You're hooked on it.
SIGN    Takeru attacks!
[07:29] Takiya
    You've already beaten the game,
SIGN    It deals 120 damage to Siegfried!
[07:31] Takiya
    so why not take a little break?
[07:34] Fafnir
    I can keep fighting for tens
    of thousands of years.
[07:38] Fafnir
    You don't need to worry about me.
[07:41] Fafnir
    Tch, another bust.
[07:43] Takiya
    Well, what should I do about this?
[07:50] Tohru
    Coming.
[07:53] Tohru
    Uhh, how do you get Mister
    Fafnir to listen to you?
[07:57] Takiya
    I figured you might know since you've
    known him a long time, Tohru-chan.
[08:01] Tohru
    Very well.
[08:02] Tohru
    I do owe you for planning that
    hot springs trip for us.
[08:06] Takiya
    Thank you!
[08:07] Takiya
    So come on, tell me how—
[08:09] Tohru
    With force!
[08:10] Tohru
    You have to force him
    to obey you with might!
[08:12] Tohru
    That's the only way!
[08:14] Takiya
    Him? With force?!
[08:17] Takiya
    You do know that's impossible
    when you say that, right?
[08:19] Tohru
    Well, that really is the only
    method I can think of with him.
SIGN    In Call
SIGN    Kobayashi-san
[08:24] Tohru
    When I first met him,
[08:26] Tohru
    he attacked me for trying to sleep
    in his cavern and we ended up fighting...
[08:32] (Flashback) Fafnir
    You're not bad.
[08:34] (Flashback) Tohru
    Neither are you.
[08:36] Tohru
    So, once we recognized
     each other's strength,
[08:38] Tohru
    he finally decided to share a little
    space in the cavern with me.
[08:41] Takiya
    So your first time meeting
    really was like that.
[08:44] Tohru
    Well, if my advice isn't helpful,
     why not try asking Miss Lucoa?
[08:47] Kanna
    Ahh.
[08:49] Kobayashi
    Ahh.
[08:49] Takiya
    That woman, huh?
[08:51] Takiya
    What's her contact info?
[08:52] Tohru
    Hey, Kanna!
[08:55] Takiya
    She hung up on me.
[08:57] Takiya
    Do I have any way to contact her?
[09:02] Takiya
    I did register Shouta-kun to my friends
    list last time we played games together.
[09:08] Shouta
    Huh? Lucoa?
[09:10] Shouta
    She said she was going abroad to have fun.
[09:13] Shouta
    She's not here now.
[09:14] Takiya
    Shoot.
[09:16] Shouta
    Do you need help with something?
[09:18] Shouta
    If I can, I'd be happy to help?
[09:20] Takiya
    You would?
[09:21] Shouta
    Yes.
[09:22] Shouta
    I'm constantly improving my
    skills as a mage every day.
[09:26] Shouta
    Helping others out would just
    be part of my training.
[09:29] Takiya
    You're a very responsible boy.
[09:32] Takiya
    Truth is...
[09:34] Shouta
    Impossible.
[09:35] Shouta
    That man's a terrifying dragon, right?
[09:38] Takiya
    Yeah, I suppose he would be.
[09:41] Takiya
    Hmm. I guess it'll be easier to do something
     about my parents instead of Faf-kun.
[09:46] Shouta
    Faf-kun?
[09:47] Shouta
    If I recall, his name is Fafnir, right?
[09:50] Shouta
    Is that a unique nickname you call him by?
[09:52] Takiya
    Huh? Yeah, it is.
[09:55] Shouta
    And he's accepted that
    nickname as his own, then?
[09:59] Takiya
    He said he doesn't mind it.
[10:02] Shouta
    You can form a pact, then.
[10:04] Takiya
    A pact?
[10:05] Shouta
    If you've given him a name
    and he's accepted it,
[10:08] Shouta
    then the preparations to form
    a pact are nearly complete.
[10:14] Shouta
    Take this.
[10:15] Takiya
    What is it?
[10:17] Shouta
    An orb of magic power.
[10:19] Shouta
    I've poured my own magic power into it.
[10:21] Shouta
    This should be enough for even someone
    without magic power like yourself
[10:25] Shouta
    to activate the ritual to forge a pact.
[10:29] Takiya
    Hmm.
[10:30] Takiya
    You're incredible, Shouta-kun.
[10:32] Shouta
    Uhh, so about that...
[10:34] Shouta
    Could I ask you for something in return?
[10:37] Takiya
    Oh? Like some of my lifespan?
[10:39] Shouta
    A devil would ask for that.
[10:43] Shouta
    I was hoping you could teach me
[10:47] Shouta
    how to be a cool adult like you.
[10:49] Takiya
    Huh?!
[10:50] Takiya
    That's a pretty surprising request.
[10:52] Takiya
    I'm not confident I can help.
[10:54] Takiya
    I'm super pathetic, you know?
[10:56] Shouta
    It's a promise!
[11:01] Takiya
    A pact, huh?
[11:04] Takiya
    I'm home.
[11:09] Takiya
    A master-servant pact...
[11:15] Takiya
    Faf-kun.
[11:16] Fafnir
    Hmm?
[11:17] Takiya
    You can have it.
[11:21] Fafnir
    What?
[11:23] Fafnir
    An orb of magic power?
[11:25] Fafnir
    This little thing
[11:29] Fafnir
    won't get me to go outside.
[11:31] Takiya
    Tch, no luck, huh?
[11:34] Takiya
    At least tell me, then.
[11:36] Takiya
    Why did someone as prideful as you
[11:38] Takiya
    permit me to give you a nickname?
[11:41] Takiya
    I didn't even know there was a risk to that.
[11:43] Fafnir
    You...
[11:46] Fafnir
    Hmph.
[11:47] Fafnir
    You should be grateful to the brat
    that gave you that measly orb.
[11:51] Takiya
    He gave it to me in return for
    some advice from an adult.
[11:55] Fafnir
    Adult, huh?
[11:58] Fafnir
    What do you think the term
    "adult" means to a dragon?
[12:01] Takiya
    Huh?
[12:02] Takiya
    Well, it means they've matured
    out of their immature state?
[12:04] Fafnir
    No, it doesn't.
[12:06] Fafnir
    That only refers to the
    physical state of the body.
[12:09] Fafnir
    There is no concept of adult
    or child in a dragon's mind.
[12:13] Fafnir
    Only strength exists when
    you live as a dragon.
[12:18] Fafnir
    Their state of mind is dependent upon that.
[12:21] Fafnir
    Parents don't protect
    their offspring, either.
[12:23] Fafnir
    Dragons didn't start talking
    about "adult" or "child"
[12:26] Fafnir
    until after there were more
    dragons interacting with humans.
[12:30] Fafnir
    Do you understand, Takiya?
[12:33] Fafnir
    It means dragons are mimicking humans.
[12:36] Fafnir
    They know such values will lead
    to foolishness, but desire them anyway.
[12:42] Fafnir
    So do the dragons that are here.
[12:47] Fafnir
    We're just masquerading as humans.
[12:51] Takikya
    You don't really believe that.
[12:53] Takikya
    I can tell at least that much.
[12:57] Fafnir
    Yeah.
[13:00] Fafnir
    Tohru has firmly declared she
    won't regret such foolishness.
[13:05] Fafnir
    And that human, Kobayashi,
    drove away the Emperor of Demise.
[13:09] Fafnir
    I grew curious as to why they would
    go so far to keep up the act.
[13:13] Fafnir
    So, I decided to try playing the
    game a bit myself to learn more.
[13:18] Fafnir
    That's the only reason I let
    you give me a nickname.
SIGN    Get!! Unique Skill
SIGN    Siegfried dropped Gram.
SIGN    Please press any button to—
[13:23] Fafnir
    It finally dropped!
[13:26] Fafnir
    Great! This is great!
[13:30] Fafnir
    Takiya!
[13:31] Fafnir
    I'm in a good mood now,
[13:32] Fafnir
    so if you beat me I'll play along
    with you and your family or whatever.
[13:36] Takiya
    Huh?
[13:37] Takiya
    But I can't beat you in strength.
[13:39] Fafnir
    Who said it had to be in strength?
[13:44] Takiya
    I'm not going to lose!
[13:46] Fafnir
    You dare to challenge me, human?!
[13:47] Fafnir
    You'll never be able to defeat me!
[13:50] Fafnir
    Ah, stop!
[13:51] Fafnir
    Don't use instakill combos!
[13:52] Takiya
    Weak humans will use any means necessary!
[14:01] Takiya
    What you think is cool is
    just my outward appearance.
[14:05] Takiya
    So, being a cool guy starts with
    creating your outward appearance.
[14:11] Shouta
    Huh?!
SIGN    Uncanny Relationships (One Side Is a Dragon)
SIGN    Episode 6
[14:20] Hachisuka
    The other day I went as far
    as where the rivers meet.
[14:24] Kuroda
    If that's true, it's worthy of praise.
[14:27] Hachisuka
    It is true!
[14:28] Hachisuka
    I have pictures, too!
[14:30] Kuramoto
    Nice, that's a great photo.
[14:34] Hachisuka
    Right?! Incredible, right?!
[14:36] Kuroda
    Stop!
[14:37] Saikawa
    You're so annoying, Hachisuka.
[14:39] Saikawa
    Even caterpillars can go there.
[14:41] Hachisuka
    What's that, Saikawa?!
[14:43] Hachisuka
    You saying you can make it there, too?!
[14:45] Saikawa
    Of course!
[14:46] Hachisuka
    You better go there, then!
[14:48] Hachisuka
    Bring back pictures as proof, too!
[14:50] Saikawa
    That's a piece of cake.
[14:53] Saikawa
    What do I do?
[14:55] Saikawa
    Why did I have to say that?
[14:58] Kanna
    Let's go together.
[15:00] Saikawa
    But we'll have to walk a long way
    to reach where the rivers meet.
[15:04] Kanna
    That's fine.
[15:05] Kanna
    Let's go together.
[15:07] Saikawa
    Kanna-san!
[15:09] Tohru
    Here, Kanna.
[15:11] Tohru
    Your lunch and tea.
[15:13] Ilulu
    Here, candy from the candy shop.
[15:15] Kanna
    Thank you, Lady Tohru, Ilulu.
[15:20] Kobayashi
    Have fun.
[15:21] Kanna
    Mmm.
[15:26] Kanna
    Saikawa.
[15:27] Saikawa
    Kanna-san!
[15:30] Saikawa
    Feels kind of grown-up,
    heading out somewhere by ourselves.
[15:36] Saikawa
    Georgie lent me this.
[15:39] Saikawa
    She said to use it to contact
    her if anything happens.
[15:42] Saikawa
    With this, we're all set to
    take photos as proof, too!
[15:46] Saikawa
    Tch.
[15:48] Both
    Skip, skip, love, love, skip.
[15:55] Saikawa
    Let's only step on the white parts.
[15:58] Kanna
    If you fall, you're dead.
[16:16] Kanna
    Saikawa, you died.
[16:18] Saikawa
    I'm immortal!
[16:20] Kanna
    Not fair!
[16:21] Saikawa
    Is too fair!
[16:23] Kanna
    Not fair!
[16:24] Saikawa
    Is too fair!
[16:44] Saikawa
    Hey, Kanna-san.
[16:45] Saikawa
    Pass!
[16:47] Kanna
    Saikawa!
[16:55] Youth
    Nirvana!
[17:03] Both
    One, two, and three!
[17:06] Saikawa
    Your lunch looks so good, Kanna-san.
[17:09] Kanna
    Lady Tohru made it for me.
[17:12] Kanna
    Yours looks good, too, Saikawa.
[17:14] Saikawa
    Yes. Georgie's great at cooking!
[17:17] Both
    Thank you for the food.
[17:27] Saikawa
    Ah, I dropped it!
[17:30] Saikawa
    K-Kanna-san, would you let me
    use your chopsticks with you?
[17:35] Kanna
    I'll lend you my spare chopsticks.
[17:38] Saikawa
    Thank you!
[17:39] Saikawa
    I'll use them with care!
[17:41] Saikawa
    Tch!
[17:47] Saikawa
    I can use this!
[17:48] Saikawa
    Nice going, Georgie!
[17:51] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, want some potato straws?
[17:53] Kanna
    I do!
[17:55] Saikawa
    Th-Then...
[17:58] Saikawa
    Here, Fanna-fan!
[18:13] Kanna
    Saikawa, want some rolled omelets?
[18:16] Saikawa
    M-My heart is so full right now.
[18:19] Kanna
    That's a shame.
[18:20] Kanna
    I ate some of it already,
    but it's really yummy.
[18:23] Saikawa
    You ate some?!
[18:26] Saikawa
    You ate some!
[18:41] Saikawa
    There are all kinds of people here.
[18:44] Saikawa
    I wonder why everyone's coming to the river.
[18:48] Kanna
    I love rivers.
[18:50] Kanna
    It feels great to bathe in the water.
[18:53] Saikawa
    Bathe in the water?!
[18:54] Kanna
    Mmm.
[18:55] Saikawa
    Kanna-san bathing in the water!
[18:57] Saikawa
    Kanna-san!
[18:59] Kanna
    Oh!
[19:05] Saikawa
    Kanna-san's an angel!
[19:08] Saikawa
    Huh?
[19:12] Saikawa
    Huh?!
[19:13] Elma
    This feels so good!
[19:18] Kanna
    Lady Elma, you forgot your
    perception blocking.
[19:22] Elma
    Oh, no!
[19:25] Saikawa
    Photo, photo evidence!
[19:29] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, move!
[19:31] Saikawa
    So cute!
[19:32] Saikawa
    But right now...!
[19:37] Saikawa
    Oh my?
[19:39] Saikawa
    Huh? Where did it go?!
[19:47] Saikawa
    We did it, Kanna-san!
[19:50] Saikawa
    We made it to where they meet!
[19:52] Kanna
    Oh!
[19:53] Saikawa
    We need to take a photo for proof!
[19:58] OldMan
    Want me to take it for you?
[20:00] Saikawa
    Huh?
[20:02] Saikawa
    Oh...
[20:07] Saikawa
    If you would, please.
[20:08] OldMan
    Sure.
[20:10] OldMan
    Okay, here I go.
[20:11] Kanna
    Oh!
[20:12] Saikawa
    Okay, Kanna-san!
[20:16] Both
    Thank you very much.
[20:19] OldWoman
    Where did you two come from?
[20:20] Saikawa
    From Oborozuka.
[20:22] OldWoman
    My, you walked quite far.
[20:25] Saikawa
    We thought we'd walk up
    to where the rivers meet.
[20:28] OldMan
    Oh?
[20:29] OldMan
    You know, long ago, this is where
    they changed the flow of the river.
[20:34] Kanna
    Oh!
[20:36] Saikawa
    Why did they change it?
[20:38] OldMan
    To prevent floods from happening
[20:40] OldMan
    and to make it easier to grow rice.
[20:45] OldMan
    Later.
[20:45] OldWoman
    Be careful now.
[20:47] Saikawa
    Yes!
[20:52] Saikawa
    What's the matter, Kanna-san?
[20:54] Kanna
    Do you think I'll change, too?
[20:57] Saikawa
    Well, of course you're going
    to get cuter and cuter!
[21:01] Saikawa
    I'm looking forward to it!
[21:03] Kanna
    Will you change, too?
[21:04] Saikawa
    Yes!
[21:05] Saikawa
    Obviously I'm going to become a great woman!
[21:20] Saikawa
    It's really true!
[21:22] Saikawa
    There was a monster in the river!
[21:25] Hachisuka
    There's no way something like that exists!
[21:27] Kuroda
    Tell us more.
[21:29] Saikawa
    It was this big
[21:31] Saikawa
    and it was bathing in the
    river. Right, Kanna-san?
[21:34] Kanna
    Saikawa, that was CG.
[21:36] Saikawa
    Huh?
[21:37] Saikawa
    It was?
[21:38] Saikawa
    Huh?
[21:39] Kuroda
    So it was AR?
[21:41] Hachisuka
    See, I told you!
[21:43] Kuramoto
    Lame.
[21:45] Saikawa
    CG?
[21:47] Kanna
    CG.
[21:48] Saikawa
    What?
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:21] Shouta
    Kobayashi-san,
[23:22] Shouta
    good afternoon!
[23:24] Kobayashi
    Huh?
SIGN    Huge Melons
[23:25] Kobayashi
    What's going on, Shouta-kun?
[23:26] Shouta
    How about it?
[23:27] Shouta
    Am I cool?
[23:29] Kobayashi
    Takiya-kun,
[23:30] Kobayashi
    what did you do?
SIGN    Episode 7
SIGN    Common Sense (It's Different For Everyone)
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Taurus
SIGN    You'll lose connection
SIGN    Lucky Advice
    
    File a claim with the administrators.
    Be thorough. Get your free gems.
SIGN    Let's use him as an example of what not do.
SIGN    This week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Taurus.

E7 - Common Sense (It's Different For Everyone)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:05] Lucoa
    What do you need,
[00:07] Lucoa
    if you're asking me to come here,
[00:11] Lucoa
    Fafnir?
[00:14] Fafnir
    Lend me your power.
[00:16] Lucoa
    What's this?
[00:18] Lucoa
    It's rare for you to rely on others.
[00:22] Lucoa
    Still...
[00:24] Lucoa
    I know it doesn't seem like it,
     but I'm pretty busy, too.
[00:27] Lucoa
    Sorry, but try someone else.
[00:28] Fafnir
    All right.
[00:29] Lucoa
    Huh?
[00:30] Lucoa
    Come on, be a little more persistent.
[02:07] Lucoa
    What's this for?
[02:08] Fafnir
    A manga.
[02:10] Lucoa
    A manga? Why?
[02:12] Fafnir
    There's a large doujinshi
    exhibition coming up soon.
[02:14] Fafnir
    I plan on selling one there.
[02:16] Lucoa
    Huh?!
[02:17] Lucoa
    You do?!
[02:18] Lucoa
    You're drawing one?!
[02:20] Fafnir
    Last time my book was just text,
[02:22] Fafnir
    and Takiya said that's why
    I was utterly crushed.
[02:25] Fafnir
    So, I'm adding artwork.
[02:27] Lucoa
    So you went with manga...
[02:28] Lucoa
    But why do you want to sell
    a book there in the first place?
[02:32] Fafnir
    Treasure.
[02:33] Lucoa
    Treasure?
[02:36] Fafnir
    This happened one day.
[02:38] (Flashback) Takiya
    Faf-kun, you really love treasure, right?
[02:42] (Flashback) Fafnir
    Yeah.
[02:43] (Flashback) Taikya
    Do you have any interest
     in creating treasure yourself, then?
[02:48] (Flashback) Fafnir
    Creating it myself?
[02:49] (Flashback) Takiya
    When you try creating something yourself,
[02:52] (Flashback) Takiya
    that can become an incredibly
    precious treasure to you.
[02:57] (Flashback) Fafnir
    Oh?
[02:59] Lucoa
    I see.
[03:01] Lucoa
    So that's why you decided to create a book?
[03:04] Lucoa
    Is that what you want my power for?
[03:05] Fafnir
    Yes.
[03:06] Lucoa
    You should have just said so
    from the start, then.
[03:09] Lucoa
    Sure!
[03:10] Lucoa
    I'll help you!
[03:12] Lucoa
    So, what should I do for you?
[03:13] Lucoa
    Blotting? Crosshatching?
[03:15] Fafnir
    You know a lot.
[03:16] Fafnir
    But not that.
[03:18] Fafnir
    People in my online games say
    it's standard for books like these
[03:22] Fafnir
    to have erotic, vulgar women.
[03:24] Fafnir
    So I'd like you to be the
    model for my artwork.
[03:30] Lucoa
    Your art model?!
[03:31] Lucoa
    I'm kind of nervous.
[03:33] Lucoa
    Wait, hold on.
[03:34] Lucoa
    You mean you view me as a vulgar woman?
[03:38] Fafnir
    Precisely.
[03:39] Fafnir
    I can't think of anyone
    better suited for the role.
[03:41] Lucoa
    You said it outright to me.
[03:43] Fafnir
    This is the outline of the story.
SIGN    Story (Draft)
[03:49] Lucoa
    The main characters are an
    elementary school boy...
[03:52] Lucoa
    and an older woman!
[03:54] Lucoa
    It's like me and Shouta-kun!
SIGN    Stop! What are you going to do me?!
SIGN    Image
SIGN    I'm going to strip you naked and lick you all over!
SIGN    Shiver
SIGN    No!
SIGN    I'm not letting you escape!
[04:04] Lucoa
    What is this?!
[04:06] Lucoa
    This woman is cruel!
SIGN    Stare
[04:07] Lucoa
    That poor boy!
[04:09] Fafnir
    Indeed.
[04:11] Fafnir
    But the main part comes next.
[04:13] Lucoa
    Oh? So love takes root after this, then?
SIGN    Damn that woman!
SIGN    But why?
SIGN    Slump
SIGN    Why can't I
SIGN    Thump
SIGN    stop thinking about her?
SIGN    Oh! I know!
[04:24] Lucoa
    Gulp.
SIGN    Because I want to curse that woman to death!
SIGN    I'll curse that woman!
[04:31] Lucoa
    Huh?!
SIGN    I'll curse her!
SIGN    Clang, clang
SIGN    I hate her very existence!
SIGN    Clang, clang, clang
SIGN    I'll curse her!
SIGN    I'll curse her!
[04:39] Lucoa
    Um, Fafnir?
[04:41] Fafnir
    What?
[04:42] Lucoa
    All the pages after this
    one have the young boy
[04:46] Lucoa
    endlessly casting various
    curses upon the woman?
[04:48] Fafnir
    That's what I wanted to
    share in the first place.
[04:51] Lucoa
    I don't think humans will
    understand your vision.
[04:55] Fafnir
    All right.
[04:56] Fafnir
    I'll draw the rough draft,
    so try some poses.
[04:58] Lucoa
    Sure, got it.
SIGN    Sketchbook
[05:09] Fafnir
    Hmm, that should do it.
[05:11] Lucoa
    Phew.
[05:12] Fafnir
    All right, next are the poses for the curses.
[05:15] Lucoa
    Huh? We're doing those, too?
[05:17] Fafnir
    Of course.
[05:18] Fafnir
    That's why I bowed my head!
[05:21] Lucoa
    Did you, though?
[05:23] Lucoa
    Th-Then, like this?
[05:25] Lucoa
    This hurts.
[05:27] Fafnir
    What is that?!
[05:29] Fafnir
    Are you screwing around?
[05:30] Fafnir
    Shed more blood from your eyes
    and twist your neck 360 degrees!
[05:33] Lucoa
    I have to go that far?!
[05:35] Fafnir
    Tch.
[05:36] Fafnir
    You're the only one I can ask to
    pull off such a skillful stunt.
[05:39] Lucoa
    I'm not sure I like that faith in me!
[05:41] Lucoa
    All right, though.
[05:43] Lucoa
    Here.
[05:44] Fafnir
    Good, I knew you could.
[05:45] Fafnir
    Now spin your arms in irregular
    directions and fly with them broken!
[05:49] Lucoa
    Yes, yes.
[05:50] Fafnir
    Now split your chest
    and butt into three parts!
[05:51] Lucoa
    That's easy enough.
[05:53] Fafnir
    Your hips!
[05:54] Fafnir
    Arch your hips into a bridge
    and climb down the stairs!
SIGN    Deathorcist
[05:57] Lucoa
    Jeez.
[05:58] Lucoa
    Phew, all done.
[06:03] Fafnir
    You did a good job.
[06:05] Lucoa
    Were you able to draw it well?
SIGN    Sketchbook
[06:16] Fafnir
    Well?
[06:19] Fafnir
    Why do you look so distraught?
[06:23] Taikya
    Faf-kun, I'm home.
[06:25] Taikya
    Huh? Welcome, Lucoa-san.
[06:27] Lucoa
    I'm paying a visit.
[06:29] Taikya
    Oh, you're making another book?
[06:32] Taikya
    Well? Is it coming along?
[06:34] Fafnir
    Of course.
[06:35] Takiya
    I'll need to work hard to make it
    in time for the exhibition, too, then.
[06:39] Fafnir
    Last time he sold out, too.
[06:41] Fafnir
    I can't lose.
[06:44] Lucoa
    A book, huh?
[06:45] Fafnir
    That reminds me, I didn't pay you yet.
[06:48] Fafnir
    Help yourself to some of my treasure.
[06:50] Lucoa
    I don't need any cursed treasure.
[06:54] Lucoa
    Better yet, I want to sell a book, too.
[06:57] Lucoa
    Lend me some of your booth?
[06:59] Fafnir
    I don't mind, but what will you sell?
[07:01] Lucoa
    Hmm, oh, how about a book
    of my cosplay photos?
[07:05] Fafnir
    Hmph!
[07:06] Fafnir
    Fool. That'll never sell.
SIGN    Second Exhibition Hall
SIGN    Venue
SIGN    Sold Out
SIGN    Sold Out
SIGN    Water Dragon Shrine
SIGN    Sold Out
SIGN    Sold Out
SIGN    Huge
     Melons
SIGN    Voluptuous and Prejudice
[07:23] Fafnir
    Why?
[07:25] Lucoa
    Man, doing something like this
    from time to time is nice.
[07:29] Lucoa
    Oh, can I have a copy, since I helped out?
[07:32] Fafnir
    No,
[07:34] Fafnir
    I already shipped one to your home.
[07:36] Lucoa
    Oh?
SIGN    Voluptuous and Prejudice
[07:41] Shouta
    V-Vulgar!
[07:42] Shouta
    Vulgar devil!
[07:49] Shouta
    Hmm?
[07:51] Shouta
    Th-This is...!
SIGN    Huge Melons
[07:53] Shouta
    Such a vulgar thing again?
[07:55] Shouta
    Gulp.
[07:57] Shouta
    This...
[07:59] Shouta
    This...!
[08:01] Shouta
    I-I won't let myself be tempted
    by this again and again!
[08:06] Shouta
    Begone, devil!
[08:07] Lucoa
    What?
[08:34] Kobayashi
    W-Work!
[08:36] Tohru
    It's your day off.
[08:37] Kobayashi
    I nearly panicked.
[08:38] Tohru
    She's like a warrior freshly
    returned from the battlefield.
[08:42] Kobayashi
    A nice sunny day like this
    is perfect for sleeping in.
[08:45] Kobayashi
    Do you ever get sleepy, Tohru?
[08:48] Tohru
    Dragons basically never sleep.
[08:51] Tohru
    Mr. Fafnir went without sleep for tens of
    thousands of years to protect his treasure.
SIGN    Angry, angry
[08:56] Kobayashi
    Talk about analog security.
[08:59] Tohru
    I suppose I do get sleepy
    during the cold season.
[09:03] Kobayashi
    Do you hibernate then?
[09:04] Tohru
    I suppose so.
[09:06] Tohru
    I have fallen into a deep sleep
    and remained that way for a while.
[09:09] Tohru
    At times like that I can't wake
    up without some kind of trigger.
[09:13] Kobayashi
    A trigger?
[09:15] Tohru
    Something like the world
    becoming full of malice,
[09:17] Tohru
    or something like blood and miasma seeping
    into the earth and creating a foul odor.
[09:22] Kobayashi
    The way you wake up is so sinister!
[09:25] Tohru
    Yet even I've been sleeping often
    ever since coming to this world.
[09:28] Kobayashi
    You're matching our lifestyle?
[09:30] Tohru
    That's part of it, but oddly enough
    I get the urge to sleep myself.
[09:35] Tohru
    I know why, though.
[09:37] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[09:38] Kobayashi
    Speaking of sleeping often,
    there's Kanna-chan.
[09:41] Tohru
    She's sleeping right now, too.
[09:42] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[09:44] Kobayashi
    Oh.
[09:45] Kobayashi
    Ohh.
[09:46] Tohru
    Come on, wake up, you two.
[09:52] Kobayashi
    They have their own room,
    so they should sleep in there.
[09:56] Tohru
    Neither of them were able to
    sleep with their parents before,
[10:01] Tohru
    so they're indulging in that with you.
[10:03] Kobayashi
    I see.
[10:05] Kobayashi
    Was it different for you?
[10:08] Tohru
    I was pretty spoiled by my parents.
[10:12] Kobayashi
    Hmm.
[10:14] Kobayashi
    Well, time to go back to sleep again.
[10:17] Tohru
    Wait, Miss Kobayashi!
[10:19] Kobayashi
    Why not?
[10:20] Kobayashi
    Sleeping is fun.
SIGN    Oborozuka Shopping District
[10:23] Tohru
    She won't wake up at all
    when she gets like that.
[10:26] Tohru
    Oh well, I guess I'll go
    shopping for dinner, then.
[10:30] Tohru
    Oh.
SIGN    Soy-Glazed Rice Dumplings
[10:31] Elma
    Hmm?
[10:32] Tohru
    Tsk!
[10:33] Tohru
    Luck's just not with me,
    running into you at this time.
[10:36] Elma
    That's my line!
[10:37] Tohru
    What's with that load of sweets?
[10:39] Tohru
    Did you quit being a dragon to become a pig?
SIGN    Sweets Sugar Capital Sweet
[10:42] Elma
    Back off.
[10:43] Elma
    I'm too tired and my mind's
    not working properly.
[10:47] Tohru
    So even you've started to sleep here, too.
[10:50] Elma
    It came naturally as I learned
    about how humans live.
[10:54] Elma
    I've been sleeping every night
    since I came to this world.
[10:58] Elma
    Have you been sleeping, too, then?
[11:00] Tohru
    Yeah.
[11:01] Elma
    It's strange, isn't it?
[11:03] Elma
    I wonder where this sleepiness comes from.
[11:06] Tohru
    It's from boredom,
[11:08] Tohru
    isn't it?
[11:10] Elma
    Boredom?
[11:11] Elma
    You've been feeling bored?
[11:13] Elma
    Why don't you go back, then?
[11:15] Tohru
    Because I don't dislike boredom.
[11:18] Tohru
    We often had to fight constantly
    without sleep for many years.
[11:24] Tohru
    We never had a chance to feel bored.
[11:26] Tohru
    It's that very boredom that
    we're enjoying now, Elma.
[11:32] Elma
    Tohru,
[11:33] Elma
    you...
[11:34] Tohru
    Tch.
[11:35] Tohru
    Hmph!
[11:36] Tohru
    It's nothing a pig who only eats
    and sleeps would ever understand!
[11:38] Elma
    Wha?!
[11:39] Tohru
    I hope you at least get sold for 88 yen
    per 100 grams at the local butcher!
[11:43] Elma
    Don't assign me a cheap price tag!
[12:03] Tohru
    It's the time when people sleep...
[12:05] Tohru
    I can sense that most
    people are sleeping now.
[12:11] Tohru
    No matter where I look,
[12:13] Tohru
    the majority of humans within
    my sight are asleep.
[12:16] Tohru
    It's not that I dislike this time of day.
[12:19] Tohru
    It's reassuring to just watch
    all the people sleeping.
[12:25] Tohru
    It's quiet.
[12:27] Kobayashi
    It is quiet.
[12:29] Kobayashi
    A drink for bed.
SIGN    Donryuu
[12:31] Kobayashi
    I slept too much this
    afternoon, so I'm not tired.
[12:34] Kobayashi
    Oh, hup-up.
[12:38] Tohru
    Hey, Miss Kobayashi.
[12:40] Tohru
    Why do you humans get sleepy?
[12:43] Kobayashi
    It's a physiological response.
[12:45] Kobayashi
    We'll die if we don't sleep.
[12:47] Kobayashi
    Part of it is that we chose to be diurnal
    rather than nocturnal during our evolution.
[12:54] Kobayashi
    That's not what you were asking about, huh?
[12:57] Kobayashi
    Well...
[12:58] Kobayashi
    It's probably pressure to conform.
[13:01] Tohru
    You mean going along with the majority?
[13:04] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[13:05] Kobayashi
    Someone probably said it's getting dark out
    and hard to do anything, so let's just sleep.
[13:10] Kobayashi
    Then someone else agreed,
[13:12] Kobayashi
    and then me too, me too...
[13:15] Kobayashi
    When everyone's asleep,
[13:16] Kobayashi
    it's kind of lonely being awake by yourself.
[13:19] Kobayashi
    So, everyone went to sleep together.
[13:22] Kobayashi
    Something like that.
[13:25] Kobayashi
    Is that what you meant?
[13:27] Tohru
    Yes.
[13:30] Tohru
    That...
[13:31] Tohru
    would mean that I've also given in...
[13:35] Tohru
    to that pressure to conform.
[13:44] Tohru
    Oh, I fell asleep.
[13:53] Tohru
    Mmm, I feel great now!
[13:57] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, good morning!
[14:00] Kobayashi
    I way overslept!
SIGN    Common Sense (It's Different For Everyone)
SIGN    Episode 7
[14:08] Teacher
    Today you'll investigate things in groups
[14:11] Teacher
    and create a newspaper.
SIGN    Let's Make a Newspaper
[14:13] Teacher
    Now, let's have discussions
    and decide on your theme.
[14:17] Students
    Yes.
[14:19] Hachisuka
    Let's investigate ghosts!
[14:20] Kuramoto
    There have been rumors about those lately.
[14:23] Kuramoto
    A woman's screams were heard
    from the art prep room.
[14:26] Kuramoto
    Might be interesting.
[14:28] Both
    Ghosts...
[14:31] Kanna
    Oh, I like that, too!
[14:34] Kanna
    Iomante!
[14:35] Saikawa
    No way, Kanna-san!
[14:37] Saikawa
    Ghosts don't exist!
[14:39] Kuroda
    Precisely.
[14:40] Kuroda
    There's never a reason
    behind rumors of ghosts.
[14:42] Hachisuka
    Oh, come on, Kuroda!
[14:44] Kuroda
    S-Stop!
[14:45] Hachisuka
    That's so dumb! You egghead,
    egghead, egghead!
[14:48] Hachisuka
    You're all just scared of them!
[14:50] Saikawa
    Huh?! Why would I be scared?!
[14:52] Saikawa
    They don't exist!
[14:53] Kuroda
    Agreed.
[14:54] Kuroda
    I'm willing to accompany you to prove it.
[14:57] Kanna
    Join us, too, Saikawa.
[15:00] Saikawa
    I-I guess I have no choice.
[15:02] Saikawa
    I could go with you for Kanna-san's sake!
[15:05] Hachisuka
    All right! It's settled, then!
[15:08] Both
    Oh!
[15:11] Hachisuka
    If a ghost shows up, I'll send it packing!
[15:14] Kuroda
    Ghosts don't have physical bodies.
[15:15] Kuroda
    You can't touch them.
[15:17] Kuroda
    Stop.
[15:18] Hachisuka
    You're always so nit-picky!
[15:20] Kuramoto
    Would ghosts show up in photos?
[15:22] Saikawa
    Are you planning to take some?
[15:24] Kuramoto
    I mean, if I posted one on the net
    it would probably go viral, right?
[15:27] Kanna
    Viral?
[15:27] Kuramoto
    It means it would get a lot of likes.
[15:30] Kobayashi
    I like that.
[15:31] Kanna
    Oh!
[15:33] Kuramoto
    Let's take a photo for now, anyway.
[15:36] Hachisuka
    Paper, rock, scissors!
[15:38] Hachisuka
    All right!
[15:39] Hachisuka
    Ch-o-co-la-te!
[15:42] Saikawa
    Hey!
[15:43] Saikawa
    What happened to investigating ghosts?!
[15:45] Hachisuka
    Who cares if we take a little break?
[15:46] Kuramoto
    I'll join in!
[15:48] Saikawa
    Huh? Hey!
[15:49] Hachisuka
    Oh! Let's start over from the
    beginning now that Kuramoto's in!
[15:52] Kuroda
    Huh? But I was winning...
[15:54] Hachisuka
    The first person to reach
    the goal will be our leader!
[15:57] Hachisuka
    And the leader's orders are absolute!
[15:59] Hachisuka
    That makes Saikawa a servant by default!
[16:02] Saikawa
    A-A servant?!
[16:04] Saikawa
    You pervert!
[16:05] Hachisuka
    Huh? How so?
[16:07] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, we're doing this!
[16:09] Saikawa
    Let's make them all cry!
[16:11] Kanna
    Oh!
[16:12] All
    Paper, rock, scissors!
[16:14] Saikawa
    Way to go, Kanna-san.
[16:16] Kanna
    Ch-o-co-la-te.
[16:18] Kanna
    I'm first!
[16:19] Saikawa
    Kanna-san's first!
[16:21] Saikawa
    Now anything Kanna-san says goes!
[16:25] Saikawa
    Now, please give us your orders, Kanna-sama!
[16:28] Kanna
    Hug me!
[16:30] Saikawa
    Huh?! You sure?!
[16:33] Saikawa
    So happy...
[16:35] Hachisuka
    She's been real crazy lately...
[16:36] Kuroda
    I can't watch this.
[16:41] Hachisuka
    Let's play soccer with this!
[16:43] Saikawa
    Hachisuka, would you cut it out already?
[16:46] Hachisuka
    What if there was a penalty game to it?
[16:48] Hachisuka
    Boys versus girls,
[16:49] Hachisuka
    losers say the name of the person they like.
[16:52] Kuramoto
    Huh? No way.
[16:54] Saikawa
    That's no penalty game.
[16:56] Saikawa
    I only have eyes for Kanna-san.
[16:59] Hachisuka
    You don't want to know who Kobayashi likes?
[17:04] Kanna
    I'll marry you, Saikawa!
[17:08] Saikawa
    Hachisuka, you're reasonably awesome!
[17:10] Hachisuka
    S-Sure.
[17:12] Hachisuka
    All right! Let's go!
[17:17] Kuramoto
    I won't lose.
[17:19] Hachisuka
    This way!
[17:22] Hachisuka
    Not fair!
[17:25] Kanna
    Shoot!
[17:29] Kuramoto
    Why?
[17:32] Saikawa
    I'm willing to become a Kobayakawa Hideaki
[17:35] Saikawa
    if it means hearing Kanna-san's proposal!
[17:38] Kuroda
    Our scheme paid off!
[17:40] Hachisuka
    Nice!
[17:47] Kuramoto
    Way to go, Kobayashi-san.
[17:49] Kanna
    I got lucky.
[17:51] Student
    What?!
[17:52] Student
    Where did this bucket come flying in from?!
[17:55] Hachisuka
    Shoot!
[17:56] Kuroda
    Strategic retreat!
SIGN    Art Room
[17:59] Student
    Where did they go?!
[18:00] Student
    You're not getting away with this!
[18:04] Hachisuka
    Not good.
[18:05] Hachisuka
    Did they see our faces?
[18:07] Kuroda
    You're surprisingly timid.
[18:10] Hachisuka
    Shut up!
[18:11] Kuroda
    Stop!
[18:14] Kuramoto
    That's so funny!
[18:17] Saikawa
    Older students are nothing special!
[18:19] Kanna
    Soccer was fun.
[18:21] Kanna
    Let's play it more.
[18:30] Kuramoto
    A scream from the art prep room?
[18:33] Kuroda
    The ghost from the rumors?
[18:36] Saikawa
    I-I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding!
[18:38] Hachisuka
    Then you go check it out!
[18:40] Saikawa
    Why me?! We're all friends!
[18:42] Saikawa
    Let's all go together!
[18:44] Hachisuka
    You just betrayed your friends earlier.
[18:46] Saikawa
    That's because you—!
[18:50] Kanna
    I'll go check.
[18:55] Saikawa
    Kanna-san!
[18:56] Saikawa
    I'll go with you!
[19:11] Kuramoto
    Huh?
[19:17] Kuroda
    The sound was made by this window.
[19:20] Saikawa
    See? I told you, didn't I?
[19:22] Saikawa
    Ghosts are absurd.
[19:24] Hachisuka
    What, that's so dumb!
[19:27] Kuroda
    I wanted to take a photo of a ghost.
[19:30] Saikawa
    What do we do for the newspaper?
[19:32] Kuroda
    We should just write about how the ghost
    was just a wooden pivoting window.
[19:35] Saikawa
    That's so boring, though.
[19:37] Hachisuka
    Let's write an article full
    of thrills and suspense.
[19:40] Saikawa
    We can't make stuff up.
SIGN    Fairy?
SIGN    Creepy
SIGN    Creepy.
[19:51] Saikawa
    Jeez, Kanna-san, let's go home.
[19:53] Kanna
    Yeah.
[19:55] Fairy
    I'm sorry.
[19:57] Fairy
    It would seem there were
    rumors that I was a ghost.
[20:03] Kanna
    Did you come from the other world?
[20:05] Fairy
    Yes, I did.
[20:08] Fairy
    I ended up coming here by accident.
[20:11] Kanna
    What were you doing there?
[20:13] Fairy
    That was a good spot to avoid
     being seen by people.
[20:16] Kanna
    And the sound?
[20:17] Fairy
    Oh, I was sharpening my
    nails on that blackboard.
[20:21] Kanna
    Oh.
[20:23] Fairy
    However, I must say you're incredible for
    blending in and living with the humans.
[20:27] Kanna
    Really?
[20:28] Fairy
    Yes.
[20:29] Fairy
    Humans are scary since there's so much
    we can't understand about them, right?
[20:33] Kanna
    That's not true at all.
[20:35] Kanna
    They're fun.
[20:36] Fairy
    You really like humans, don't you?
[20:43] Kanna
    Yeah, I love them.
[20:46] Fairy
    I see.
[20:48] Fairy
    Here I am at a loss, wishing I could
    return our world as soon as possible.
[20:53] Kanna
    I know a way to get back to that world.
[20:56] Fairy
    R-Really?!
[21:00] Ilulu
    This is exhausting, you know!
[21:02] Fairy
    Thank you so much!
[21:05] Fairy
    I'll never forget this kindness.
[21:08] Fairy
    Farewell.
[21:15] Hachisuka
    Hey, let's investigate space next.
[21:18] Saikawa
    Huh?
[21:19] Saikawa
    What are you saying after
    dragging us all over yesterday.
[21:22] Kuroda
    Aliens are out there.
[21:24] Kuroda
    There's a reason behind them.
[21:25] Kuramoto
    If they'll look good in photos, I'm in.
[21:27] Saikawa
    I can't go along with this anymore.
[21:29] Kanna
    That sounds fun!
[21:31] Kanna
    I'll do it!
[21:31] Saikawa
    Hey, Kanna-san?!
[21:33] Hachisuka
    All right,
[21:34] Hachisuka
    with that settled, after school
    today we'll investigate the city!
[21:38] Three
    Oh!
[21:39] Saikawa
    Huh? I'll come, too, then.
[21:41] Hachisuka
    You were late to join, so you're
    carrying our stuff, Saikawa!
[21:43] Saikawa
    Huh?!
[21:44] Saikawa
    Why?!
[21:45] Saikawa
    I don't mind carrying Kanna-san's things,
[21:46] Saikawa
    but I'm not carrying yours!
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:21] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan,
[23:22] Kobayashi
    what did you decide to write
    about for your wall newspaper?
[23:24] Kanna
    We settled on space.
[23:26] Kobayakawa
    I like that, it's romantic.
[23:27] Kanna
    We're starting with the Roswell
    incident and Area 51.
SIGN    Episode 8
SIGN    The World's Only (Insert Phrase You Like Here)
[23:31] Kobayashi
    You're taking it in that direction?
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Aquarius
SIGN    You might see a side of a friend you don't like
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    Kekekeke~
SIGN    Lol, right? Don't spam it.
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Aquarius!

E8 - The World's Only (Insert Phrase You Like Here)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] ---
    
SIGN    Oborozuka Shopping District
[00:09] Shouta
    Oh, there, there.
[00:17] Shouta
    All right!
SIGN    Father's Day Gifts
[00:23] Shouta
    I'm home!
[00:24] Lucoa
    Welcome home.
[00:26] Lucoa
    Shouta-kun, we have snacks.
[00:28] Shouta
    I'm fine, I don't need any!
[02:09] Lucoa
    Shouta-kun, what's the matter?
[02:11] Shouta
    I was thinking of making
     a present for Father's Day.
[02:14] Lucoa
    Tits Day?
[02:14] Lucoa
    (Chichi = Father or tits)
[02:17] Shouta
    A talisman?
[02:18] Shouta
    It might be a bit difficult,
    but I'll go with this.
[02:20] Lucoa
    I'll help you out, then.
[02:23] Shouta
    No.
[02:23] Lucoa
    Huh?
[02:25] Shouta
    I have to do this on my own.
[02:29] Lucoa
    And that's what happened.
[02:31] Kobayashi
    Wow, a Father's Day present, huh?
[02:34] Kobayashi
    Shouta-kun's so kind.
[02:36] Lucoa
    Yeah. I'm looking forward to
    a present from Shouta-kun.
[02:39] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[02:40] Tohru
    Talismans are those protective
    charms humans often carry, right?
[02:45] Kobayashi
    Protective charms, huh?
[02:47] Kobayashi
    Do those actually have any effect?
[02:49] Tohru
    They're only psychological.
[02:51] Tohru
    They always burn up and
    disappear with the human.
[02:53] Kobayashi
    That's some first-hand testimony...
[02:56] Lucoa
    Talismans that are properly made with
    magic do provide an effect, though.
[02:56] Kanna
    Too weak.
[02:56] Ilulu
    How about this, then!
[02:58] Kanna
    Not a problem.
[02:58] Ilulu
    Then finishing move, torrent of fire!
[03:00] Kobayashi
    They do?
[03:02] Lucoa
    But I don't understand why he'd
    make a talisman for Tits Day.
[03:06] Kobayashi
    Lucoa-san, what are you going on about?
[03:09] Lucoa
    Huh? But it is Tits Day, right?
SIGN    Tits Day
[03:12] Kobayashi
    Yeah, sure, sure, boobs and boobs.
[03:29] Shouta
    Uhh...
[03:32] Shouta
    Huh? That's expensive!
[03:33] Shouta
    The official ones are sold out...
[03:36] Shouta
    The rating on these is low...
    Will they be okay?
[03:44] Shouta
    That does it.
SIGN    Back Confirm Order
SIGN    Thank you for your order.
SIGN    Your products will arrive shortly.
[03:48] Delivery
    Thank you very much.
[03:51] Shouta
    Hup.
[03:55] Shouta
    Uhh, first I take a unicorn's horn
     and a wyvern's blood,
[04:00] Shouta
    then add ground branches
    from a human-face tree,
[04:02] Shouta
    and dried blue rose...
[04:04] Shouta
    After that...
[04:07] Shouta
    Once I put everything in,
    let it stew for an hour,
[04:10] Shouta
    and once the pungent smell
    fades cast the bonding spell.
[04:16] Lucoa
    Shouta-kun, are you okay?!
[04:18] Shouta
    I-I'm fine!
[04:19] Lucoa
    Maybe I should help after all?
[04:21] Shouta
    I-I don't need it! Absolutely not!
[04:33] Shouta
    T-Try again!
[04:36] Lucoa
    Phew.
[04:43] Lucoa
    Is he okay?
SIGN    Ruined Metropolis: Old Residential Area (Midday)
SIGN    Mission Clear
SIGN    Target Exterminated
[05:04] Takiya&Chatbox
    Nice going.
[05:06] Takiya&Chatbox
    Man, this current event
    quest takes a lot of work.
SIGN    Acquired
    Blue Rose and Parchment
[05:10] Shouta&Chatbox
    Yeah, it does.
[05:12] Fafnir&Chatbox
    I've already got it down.
SIGN    Synthesis Shop
SIGN    Synthesis Base
SIGN    Silver Talisman
SIGN    Synthesis Materials
SIGN    Holy Dragon Claw
SIGN    Parchment
SIGN    Blue Rose
SIGN    Success Rate -
SIGN    Item Synthesis
SIGN    Holy Dragon Claw
SIGN    Blue Rose
SIGN    Tainted Crystal
SIGN    Dragon Fragment
SIGN    Parchment
SIGN    Rusted
SIGN    Mysterious
SIGN    Iron
SIGN    Parchment
SIGN    Paper made from sheep's hide.
    In addition to its use as synthesis
    material, it can be sold.
SIGN    Blue Rose
SIGN    This artificially created--
SIGN    When equipped it provides Ice--
SIGN    Silver Talisman
SIGN    Synthesis
    Materials
SIGN    Holy Dragon Claw
SIGN    Parchment
SIGN    Blue Rose
SIGN    Success Rate 25%
SIGN    Holy Dragon Claw Parchment Blue
SIGN    Synthesis Results
SIGN    Holy Talisman Success Rate 25%
SIGN    Synthesize this item?
SIGN    Holy Talisman
SIGN    A talisman created from a special ore.
    When fighting high ranking enemies,
    it negates attack debuffs
     for a set period of time.
SIGN    Synthesis Successful
SIGN    Holy Talisman
SIGN    Contaminated Zone: Synthesis Shop Front
SIGN    Quest Loading...
     Ruined Metropolis Warden
    Recommended Rank A+
[05:20] Takiya&Chatbox
    Shouta-kun, what's bugging you?
[05:23] Shouta&Chatbox
    Huh? N-Nothing. Why do you ask?
[05:27] Takiya&Chatbox
    Just a hunch.
[05:31] Shouta&Chatbox
    To be honest, I'm trying to make a
    talisman for a Father's Day present,
[05:36] Shouta&Chatbox
    but it's not going well.
[05:38] Takiya&Chatbox
    I see.
[05:39] Shouta
    I followed the steps written in the grimoire
    to the letter, so why isn't it working?
[05:45] Shouta
    I want to show my Father how good
    I am, but I just keep failing...
[05:50] Shouta
    I need to hurry up and become
    a full-fledged mage.
SIGN    Wasteland (Midday)
[05:53] Takiya
    It's the same as a game.
[05:56] Shouta
    A game?
[05:57] Takiya&Chatbox
    When you try to defeat higher-level enemies,
    losing is only natural.
[06:02] Shouta&Chatbox
    That's true.
[06:04] Takiya&Chatbox
    So, if you really want to defeat them,
SIGN    Frontline Base Rest Area
[06:07] Takiya&Chatbox
    you should try thinking
    about the developers' feelings.
[06:10] Shouta&Chatbox
    The developers'?
[06:12] Takiya
    Yeah. Games are programmed worlds,
[06:15] Takiya
    so they only operate as
    the developers intended.
SIGN    Desert Ruins (Midday)
[06:19] Takiya
    So, what did those creators
    feel when they made it?
SIGN    Cavern
[06:23] Takiya
    What did they want their players to do?
[06:26] Takiya
    If you can figure out that mindset,
[06:28] Takiya
    the way to clear the game
     becomes plain to see.
[06:32] Fafnir&Chatbox
    That's the part you always struggle with.
SIGN    Ruined Metropolis: Old Residential District (Night)
[06:34] Takiya&Chatbox
    Boohoohoo...
[06:35] Takiya&Chatbox
    When you're on the developer side,
[06:37] Takiya&Chatbox
    it's a huge hassle to figure out
    how to mislead your players.
[06:41] Shouta&Chatbox
    How the developers felt?
SIGN    Ruined Metropolis: Old Residential District (Night)
SIGN    Mission Clear
SIGN    Target Exterminated
[06:46] Shouta
    Thank you so much!
[06:47] Shouta
    I think I'll give it a another try!
[06:51] Shouta
    There's some kind of condition required
    that's not written in the grimoire.
[06:56] Shouta
    What could it be?
[07:02] Shouta
    All right.
[07:05] Shouta
    It's done!
[07:07] Shouta
    Look! Lucoa!
[07:09] Shouta
    I finished the talisman!
[07:11] Lucoa
    Oh, good job.
[07:14] Lucoa
    How'd you do it, Shouta-kun?
[07:15] Shouta
    I thought about the person
    who wrote the grimoire
[07:17] Shouta
    and when I looked up where it was written,
[07:19] Shouta
    I found it was written in what we call
    the Dead Sea, which is below sea level.
[07:23] Shouta
    So, I tried recreating that same environment
    by increasing the air pressure in my room,
[07:26] Shouta
    and— Ah!
[07:27] Shouta
    N-No!
[07:28] Shouta
    I'm telling a corrupt devil!
[07:30] Lucoa
    Huh?
[07:51] Lucoa
    Did he praise you?
[07:53] Shouta
    Y-Yeah.
[07:57] Shouta
    But I have to work harder.
[08:01] Lucoa
    Shouta-kun, you worked real hard.
[08:06] Lucoa
    It's Tits Day.
[08:08] Shouta
    S-Stop it!
SIGN    Shoulder Massage Ticket
[08:18] Kobayashi
    Hmm? Shoulder massage tickets?
[08:21] Kobayashi
    What's this for?
[08:22] Kanna
    It's a present.
[08:23] Kobayashi
    For what? It's not my birthday or anything.
[08:27] Kanna
    Because it's Father's Day.
SIGN    Father's Day
[08:28] Kobayashi
    Huh? I'm a father?
[08:31] Kanna
    Mhmm.
[08:32] Kobayashi
    Not a mother?
[08:33] Kanna
    Mhmm.
SIGN    The World's Only (Insert Phrase You Like Here)
SIGN    Episode 8
[08:41] Tohru
    What's the matter, Miss Kobayashi?
[08:44] Kobayashi
    I think I've caught a cold.
[08:46] Tohru
    A cold?
[08:47] Tohru
    That's something I don't understand.
[08:50] Kobayashi
    Don't dragons catch colds?
[08:52] Tohru
    There's no way a mere virus
    could survive inside my body.
[08:56] Kobayashi
    Must be nice.
[08:58] Kobayashi
    Well, I have to go to work.
[09:00] Tohru
    Huh? Are you well enough to go?
[09:02] Kobayashi
    I'm fine, I'm fine.
[09:04] Kobayashi
    If I took off for something this minor— Whoa.
[09:08] Kobayashi
    Whoa.
[09:10] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi!
[09:13] Kobayashi
    Hmm.
[09:14] Tohru
    D-Doesn't this mean you're
    really in danger?!
[09:17] Kobayashi
    I'll be fine.
[09:19] Kobayashi
    But I won't be able to go to work,
    so I need to call them.
[09:22] Tohru
    I'll do it!
[09:24] Takiya
    A cold?
[09:26] Takiya
    Yeah, I got it.
[09:27] Takiya
    Let her know we'll handle it somehow.
[09:30] Tohru
    Yes.
[09:31] Tohru
    Umm, Mister Takiya?
[09:33] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi took some medicine
    and promptly fell asleep,
[09:37] Tohru
    but is there anything else I can do for her?
[09:41] Tohru
    I don't know how to interact
    with a human who's sick.
[09:46] Takiya
    What about shrinking down
    and killing the cold germs?
[09:50] Tohru
    I could do that,
[09:51] Tohru
    but I'd likely destroy her
    body as well in the process.
[09:54] Takiya
    Then...
[09:56] Tohru
    Nurse her?
SIGN    Nursing
[09:57] Takiya
    That's right. What's important is—
[09:59] Tohru
    I see.
[10:00] Tohru
    What she needs is maid power!
SIGN    Maid Power
[10:04] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi needs me!
[10:07] Tohru
    I have to go all out!
[10:11] Tohru
    So, how do I nurse her?
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy
    
     Games
[10:16] Ilulu
    Why don't you feed her
    something good to eat?
[10:19] Ilulu
    Like charcoal or coal?
[10:21] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi isn't
     a fire dragon or a brick oven.
[10:25] Fafnir
    I know plenty of ways to make humans ill,
[10:28] Fafnir
    but I know nothing about curing them.
[10:29] Tohru
    Learn to fend them off, too!
[10:33] Lucoa
    You should feed her something
    easily digested,
[10:35] Lucoa
    keep her head cool,
[10:37] Lucoa
    and wipe her sweat for her.
[10:39] Tohru
    The fact it takes three attempts
    to get a reasonable answer
[10:42] Tohru
    says a lot about my friends...
[10:44] Tohru
    Anyway, something easily digested...
SIGN    Kanna
[10:48] Tohru
    I wonder what would be good?
[10:50] Tohru
    I can digest just about anything.
SIGN    Rice Gruel
[10:54] Tohru
    Rice gruel?
SIGN    Lots of Recipes
SIGN    Easily-Digested Meals Full of Flavor
[10:55] Tohru
    That looks like a simple dish.
[10:57] Tohru
    Yogurt...
[10:59] Tohru
    I think Kanna has some in the fridge.
[11:02] Tohru
    Udon, gelatin, bananas.
[11:04] Tohru
    Hmm, that just leaves something sweet.
[11:07] Tohru
    It's finished! Here's some rice gruel!
[11:10] Kobayashi
    She went out of her way to make it,
[11:12] Kobayashi
    so it would be rude to say it's a
    weird concoction or I can't eat it...
[11:16] Kobayashi
    It'll be pretty hard to teach her
    the concept of foods that go together.
[11:22] Tohru
    Oh, you're eating it right up.
[11:25] Kobayashi
    Phew.
[11:26] Kobayashi
    Next time, just make it normally
    and follow the recipe.
[11:30] Kobayashi
    Normally, please.
[11:31] Tohru
    Yes.
[11:36] Tohru
    You're sweating a lot.
[11:38] Tohru
    Please let me wipe it away.
[11:40] Kobayashi
    Huh? Sure.
[11:48] Tohru
    What is this?
[11:50] Tohru
    My heart is racing.
[11:57] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi always comes
    off as a reliable person,
[12:02] Tohru
    so it's my first time
    seeing her so vulnerable.
[12:06] Tohru
    She will be all right, won't she?
[12:09] Tohru
    I've known whole villages
    destroyed by epidemics,
[12:12] Tohru
    and I've seen whole nations
    wiped out by them, too.
[12:17] Tohru
    You will be all right, won't you?
[12:21] Tohru
    I don't want anything precious
    to me to get broken,
[12:24] Tohru
    but everything breaks eventually.
[12:27] Tohru
    That's especially true for me,
[12:28] Tohru
    since I can break
[12:30] Tohru
    just about anything.
[12:34] Tohru
    All right!
[12:35] Kanna
    I'm home!
[12:37] Tohru
    Kanna,
[12:38] Tohru
    please watch over Miss Kobayashi.
[12:40] Kanna
    Sure.
[12:45] Tohru
    There are medicines that grant immortality,
[12:47] Tohru
    but Miss Kobayashi would hate those,
[12:50] Tohru
    so I have to at least find medicine
    that can cure her illness.
[12:54] Tohru
    That might be especially hard.
[12:56] Tohru
    But...
[12:57] Tohru
    I'll do it!
[13:00] Tohru
    My precious Miss Kobayashi
[13:02] Tohru
    is waiting for me!
[13:16] Kobayashi
    Man, I'm all better after a good rest.
[13:19] Kanna
    Kobayashi, are you okay?
[13:22] Kobayashi
    I'll be fine after taking some
    medicine and sleeping again.
[13:25] Ilulu
    That's great!
[13:27] Kobayashi
    Where's Tohru?
[13:29] Kobayashi
    Tohru?
[13:33] Kobayashi
    What's wrong?
[13:34] Kobayashi
    You look exhausted.
[13:36] Tohru
    Well, I searched everywhere.
[13:40] Kobayashi
    Huh? What's that...?
[13:42] Tohru
    I found some very effective medicine.
[13:46] Kobayashi
    Is it safe?
[13:48] Kobayashi
    There's nothing weird in it, is—
[13:56] Kobayashi
    I'll take it.
[14:05] Kobayashi
    Yeah, it's working.
[14:08] Tohru
    You mean it?
[14:11] Kobayashi
    Yeah! This is incredible.
[14:13] Tohru
    Oh, thank goodness.
[14:15] Kobayashi
    I have no idea if it's working or not,
[14:16] Tohru
    I really was worried about you.
[14:20] Kobayashi
    but I'd say it's working no matter what
    was in it after seeing that look.
[14:26] Kobayashi
    Tohru, thank you.
[14:32] Kobayashi
    Tohru!
[14:34] Kobayashi
    What's the meaning of this?!
[14:37] Tohru
    Uhh, maybe it's a side effect?
[14:40] Tohru
    The medicine was for beast-folk, so...
[14:43] Tohru
    But you're cute.
[14:45] Kobayashi
    I can't go to work like this!
[14:56] Kobayashi
    Meow!
[14:57] Kobayashi
    Meow!
[14:58] Tohru
    So cute!
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy
    Games
[15:07] Ilulu
    Hmm?
[15:09] Ilulu
    It's a doll.
[15:12] Take
    Did someone forget it?
[15:13] Take
    It's well-made.
[15:15] Take
    This is an expensive one.
[15:17] Ilulu
    It's pretty.
[15:18] Ilulu
    We should probably return it, right?
[15:21] Take
    They'll probably come by
    tomorrow to pick it up.
SIGN    The Next Day
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
SIGN    Lost
[15:26] Take
    No one's coming.
[15:28] Ilulu
    I'll go look for them.
[15:32] Ilulu
    First, I'll ask around!
[15:34] Ilulu
    You're coming, too, Take?
[15:35] Take
    Well, I'd be worried about you alone.
[15:38] Ilulu
    Oh, hey!
[15:39] Girl
    Oh, it's the candy shop lady.
[15:42] Ilulu
    Do you know who owns this doll?
[15:44] Girl
    I don't.
[15:45] Ilulu
    I see.
[15:47] Girl
    By the way, are you and Take together?
[15:50] Take
    Huh?! What are you saying?!
[15:52] Take
    Of course we aren't?!
[15:53] Ilulu
    What are you saying?
[15:54] Ilulu
    You're together with me,
    looking for the owner, right?
[15:57] Take
    That's not what she meant!
[15:58] Ilulu
    Oh.
[15:59] Ilulu
    Let's try asking that kid, too!
[16:01] Take
    She's not listening.
SIGN    KiraKira Real Estate
[16:04] Ilulu
    No one knows, huh?
[16:06] Take
    It's not that easy to find someone.
SIGN    Fried Pancakes
[16:10] Take
    Maybe they abandoned it
    instead of forgetting it?
[16:20] Ilulu
    No, I'll find them!
[16:32] Take
    I think we should turn it into
    the police at this point.
[16:37] Ilulu
    Hmm.
[16:38] Take
    Is there anyone else you can turn to?
SIGN    The Day After That
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[16:42] Ilulu
    I brought help!
[16:44] Ilulu
    Kobayashi!
[16:45] Kobayashi
    Hello.
[16:47] Kobayashi
    I heard what's going on, but I don't
    think there's anything I can do.
[16:51] Ilulu
    No, I know you can do it!
[16:53] Take
    So this is the Kobayashi that
    Ilulu mentioned before?
[16:56] Take
    She looks normal at first glance,
[16:57] Take
    but what's with that blonde maid behind her?
[17:01] Take
    She's totally composed,
    like she's used to that.
[17:03] Take
    Is she making her dress like that every day?
[17:05] Take
    This woman's definitely bad news!
[17:08] Kobayashi
    Let's take a picture and
    try searching on the net.
[17:12] Kobayashi
    More importantly, Ilulu,
[17:13] Kobayashi
    can you use magic to sharpen
    your sense of smell?
[17:16] Ilulu
    Oh, right!
[17:20] Take
    Why are you suddenly forcing
    her into puppy play?!
[17:23] Kobayashi
    Oh, no, I—
[17:24] Take
    Have you already trained her?!
[17:25] Kobayashi
    Hey, now.
[17:26] Tohru
    Mister Take, you have the wrong idea.
[17:28] Take
    Huh?
[17:29] Tohru
    The only one allowed to
    receive training is me!
[17:31] Kobayashi
    Don't make this more complicated!
[17:33] Ilulu
    Okay, I've got their scent.
[17:35] Take
    Hey, hold on.
[17:41] (Flashback) Friend
    Ilulu-chan,
[17:43] (Flashback) Friend
    this is for you.
[17:45] (Flashback) Ilulu
    What's this? Are you sure?
[17:47] (Flashback) Friend
    Yeah, I made it for you, Ilulu-chan.
[17:50] (Flashback) Ilulu
    Thank you! I'll cherish it.
[18:01] Take
    Hey, how far are we going?
[18:05] Take
    We're heading into the next town over.
[18:07] Ilulu
    I'd feel bad making you follow any further.
[18:10] Ilulu
    You can go home if you want.
[18:12] Take
    Really?
[18:14] Take
    I'll go home, then.
[18:17] Ilulu
    Okay.
[18:27] Ilulu
    It's still further?
[18:30] Ilulu
    Did they really abandon it?
[18:33] Ilulu
    It was still warm when I picked it up.
[18:36] Ilulu
    They were holding it up until that moment.
[18:44] Ilulu
    What do I do?
[18:45] Ilulu
    It'll get wet!
[18:46] Ilulu
    Ahh, the scent is fading, too!
[19:03] Ilulu
    I thought you went home?
[19:05] Take
    It was getting cloudy.
[19:08] Take
    Looked like it was going to rain.
[19:14] Ilulu
    Take...
[19:15] Ilulu
    Long ago, I abandoned
    a doll that I cherished.
[19:21] Ilulu
    I regret it now and wish I
    could go back and retrieve it.
[19:29] Ilulu
    I'm sure...
[19:31] Ilulu
    it's the same for this doll.
[19:39] Take
    We need to make sure we find them, then.
[19:44] Ilulu
    Take.
[19:47] Kobayashi
    Ah, found her, over there.
[19:52] Kobayashi
    Ilulu!
[19:53] Ilulu
    Oh, Kobayashi.
[19:55] Take
    Huh? Where did she just come from?
[19:57] Kobayashi
    That doll was a custom order,
    so I pinned down the store that made it.
[20:02] Kobayashi
    When I asked them about it,
[20:04] Kobayashi
    they said the owner often visited
    the shop for maintenance,
[20:06] Kobayashi
    so they remembered them well.
[20:08] Ilulu
    Huh? Then...
[20:09] Kobayashi
    We found the owner.
[20:12] Kobayashi
    They said they wanted us to bring it.
[20:14] Kobayashi
    We have their address, too.
[20:16] Take
    Just who are you?
[20:21] Owner
    I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble.
[20:23] Owner
    I left it there with the
    intention of abandoning it.
[20:28] Owner
    I figured you might put it on display.
[20:31] Owner
    I'm in high school now
[20:33] Owner
    and my friends were teasing me,
    calling it childish, but...
[20:38] Owner
    I've regretted it ever since I abandoned it.
[20:41] Owner
    A little late for that now though, huh?
[20:43] Ilulu
    That's not true.
[20:44] Ilulu
    If you can take it back, then you should.
[20:47] Ilulu
    Tell it, "Welcome home."
[20:51] Owner
    Yeah.
[20:53] Owner
    Yeah.
[20:56] Owner
    I'm sorry.
[21:01] Owner
    Welcome home.
[21:04] Tohru
    Come on, Ilulu.
[21:05] Tohru
    Please go take a bath.
[21:07] Ilulu
    Yeah.
[21:09] Kobayashi
    Well, thank you.
[21:11] Kobayashi
    For going along with Ilulu.
[21:13] Take
    No, I didn't really—
[21:14] Ilulu
    Take!
[21:15] Ilulu
    You're wet, too, right?
[21:17] Ilulu
    Come take one with me!
[21:19] Take
    What are you saying?!
[21:20] Take
    Don't come at me naked!
[21:20] Ilulu
    It's a bath, not outside,
    so it's not embarrassing!
[21:24] Take
    What kind of logic is that?!
[21:27] Kobayashi
    Oh, to be young.
[21:29] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi.
[21:34] Ilulu
    Tada!
[21:36] Ilulu
    It's a Take doll!
[21:37] Ilulu
    Cute, isn't it?
[21:38] Take
    Dum— Where do you think you're putting it?!
[21:41] Ilulu
    It's comforting in here.
[21:42] Take
    C-Comforting?!
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[21:45] Ilulu
    Oh, want me to squeeze you in here, too?
[21:47] Take
    You're shameless!
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:20] Kobayashi
    Ilulu, how's your part time job?
[23:22] Ilulu
    It's fun.
[23:23] Ilulu
    We have one that comes
    around all the time, too.
[23:25] Kobayashi
    A regular, huh?
[23:26] Ilulu
    Yeah.
[23:26] Ilulu
    But sometimes they try to get a
    free meal and put us in a spot.
[23:29] Kobayashi
    Huh? Is that person doing okay?
SIGN    Episode 9
SIGN    There Are Various Reasons Behind It (It's Full of Elma)
[23:31] Ilulu
    It's not a person, it's a cat.
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Aries
SIGN    You might lose something precious
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    You should keep things you
     cherish stored in your chest.
SIGN    You mean in your heart, right? Right?
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Aries!

E9 - There Are Various Reasons Behind It (It's Full of Elma)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] Kobayashi
    It all started with a single
    statement from Elma.
[00:04] Elma
    I demand improved working conditions!
SIGN    I demand improved working conditions
[00:08] Kobayashi
    What's this out of nowhere?
[00:10] Kobayashi
    Are you hungry?
[00:11] Elma
    This company demands too much overtime!
[00:13] Elma
    For one thing, the workload demanded
    of each individual is excessive!
[00:15] Kobayashi
    Elma's demands were justified.
[00:17] Kobayashi
    However, we had no other
    choice with our scheduling.
[00:20] Kobayashi
    Plus, our company has already made solid
    improvements since its founding.
[00:24] Kobayashi
    It was slow going, but the working
    conditions have improved.
[00:28] Kobayashi
    Our current busyness was just something
    we had to resign ourselves to.
[00:32] Kobayashi
    I explained that to her, but...
[00:35] Elma
    Don't give up and accept it!
[00:37] Elma
    I'm fighting for it
[00:39] Elma
    and I'm going to seize our freedom!
[00:42] Kobayashi
    Surrounded by those of us who had grown
    accustomed to exploitative labor
[00:45] Kobayashi
    and aimlessly lived out our days,
[00:47] Kobayashi
    Elma took a stand all by herself.
[00:50] Kobayashi
    G'luck.
SIGN    Work Conditions Improvement Proposal
[02:23] Kobayashi
    Two days later,
[02:23] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi, please look at this!
[02:24] Kobayashi
    Elma used the scant few moments
    she had in between work
[02:27] Kobayashi
    to create a proposal for
    improved working conditions.
[02:30] Kobayashi
    I was once again astonished
    by the capability of dragons.
[02:35] Kobayashi
    However...
[02:38] Elma
    You're scoffing at me?!
SIGN    Expand Personnel
[02:40] Kobayashi
    The expansion of personnel?
[02:42] Elma
    Yes.
[02:43] Kobayashi
    We're currently doing mid-career recruitment,
     but there's not a single applicant.
[02:46] Elma
    Why's that?
[02:48] Kobayashi
    The programming language we use
    at this company is, well...
[02:52] Kobayashi
    Even if we hired fresh graduates,
    it would take time to train them.
[02:55] Elma
    Couldn't they just learn it quickly?
[02:57] Kobayashi
    Don't assume everyone is just like you.
[02:59] Kobayashi
    At any rate, redo it,
    taking that into account.
SIGN    Redo It, Taking That Into Account
SIGN    The Next Day
[03:04] Elma
    I finished the revisions!
SIGN    Work Conditions
    Improvement Proposal
    Ver. 2
[03:06] Kobayashi
    That was fast!
[03:08] Kobayashi
    I was surprised by her speed,
    but the content really left me shocked.
[03:12] Kobayashi
    The rough spots had been
    completely revised,
[03:14] Kobayashi
    none of the sections had
    any contradictions,
[03:16] Kobayashi
    and the text was organized perfectly.
[03:19] Kobayashi
    This is great!
[03:21] Elma
    Really?!
[03:22] Kobayashi
    Submit it to our department head right away!
[03:24] Elma
    Got it!
[03:27] Elma
    It was a no-go.
[03:29] Kobayashi
    He talked to her about the company's
    income and expenditures,
[03:31] Kobayashi
    things those of us on the floor
    didn't have any dealings with,
[03:34] Kobayashi
    and she couldn't fight back.
[03:36] Kobayashi
    She was feeling depressed,
    so I said this to her:
SIGN    Let's give up and get back to work
[03:41] Elma
    Dammit!
SIGN    The Day After That
[03:45] Elma
    I revised it!
SIGN    Work Conditions
    Improvement Proposal
    Ver. 3
[03:47] Kobayashi
    That was fast!
[03:49] Kobayashi
    We were all overwhelmed by Elma's intensity
[03:52] Kobayashi
    as we began reading through the paperwork.
[03:55] Kobayashi
    Then,
[03:57] Kobayashi
    that paperwork had every individual's
    schedule written out in detail,
[04:00] Kobayashi
    including bathroom breaks, pace slowdowns,
    portion of time away from their desks,
[04:04] Kobayashi
    and even the time spent resting their
    head on their elbow at their desk
[04:07] Kobayashi
    and how many times they
    recrossed their legs,
[04:09] Kobayashi
    all laid out like a curse in a
    proposal to improve efficiency.
[04:12] Kobayashi
    It was completely devoid of
    any concept of privacy,
[04:15] Kobayashi
    and it dug so deep into each individual
SIGN    Yamashita
    
     Current Work Analysis (Sample Excerpt)
[04:17] Kobayashi
    that many employees thought it
    would have been more humane
SIGN    Time Away From Desk 86%
    
    Main Activities: Bathroom, Vending Machine Beverage Purchases, One Yawn
    
    Time Away From Desk 100%
    
    Main Activities: Slacking, Chatting With Other Employees In The Office Or The Hallway
    
    Time Away From Desk 38%
    
    Main Activities: Staring At PC For Several Minutes With Head Resting On Arm, Recrossed His Legs Twice
    
    Time Away From Desk 16%
    
    Main Activities: Checking Schedule Chart, Drinking Beverages, Looking At Cell Phone
    
    Time Away From Desk: 0%
    
    Main Activities: Programming, Yawning
[04:20] Kobayashi
    to publish nude photos of them
    without their permission.
SIGN    
    
SIGN    The above outline is an example from one day.
    The main area of improvement for Yamashita is the time he requires
    before he's able to focus on work. To improve this, I recommend having
    Yamashita follow a set routine before he engages with work. This will allow
    him to consciously switch his focus. It would be best to have Yamashita
    decide what the best routine would be; for example, drinking a coffee.
    Making this a routine would allow him to settle into work everyday without
    stress. Such a minor change in his habits should be easy for him to
    accomplish. Once he's established a routine, it will shorten the time
    Yamashita requires to start work, improving overall efficiency.
    (See attached reference sheet.)
[04:22] Kobyashi
    How on earth did she get such data?
[04:25] Kobyashi
    According to her...
[04:26] Elma
    I used clairvoyance.
[04:28] Elma
    I turned my vision into a
    thousand screen multi-display.
[04:32] Kobayashi
    Even her analogies were
    being tainted by work.
[04:35] Kobayashi
    She triumphantly headed
    to submit her proposal.
[04:38] Kobayashi
    Setting the shocking content aside,
[04:40] Kobayashi
    it was amply convincing
    to serve in negotiations.
[04:44] Kobayashi
    Maybe Premium Fridays could
    be more than just a dream.
[04:48] Kobayashi
    However...
[04:50] Kobayashi
    I just can't relax if I haven't
    worked at least eight hours.
[04:55] Takiya
    Kobayashi-san...
[04:57] Kobayashi
    However, we only enjoyed
    that hope for a short time.
[05:02] Kobayashi
    All three of us were surprised when we
    were summoned by the executive director.
[05:06] Kobayashi
    He wasn't firing us, was he?
[05:09] Kobayashi
    We all headed to his office with
    anxiety and annoyance in our hearts.
[05:16] Exec
    Come in.
[05:17] Kobayashi
    Excuse us.
[05:21] Exec
    Hey, you've been very kind to Shouta.
[05:25] Kobayashi
    Oh, no.
SIGN    To Shouta <3
    Welcome home!
    I'll be home after I hit the store,
    so wait for me!
    From Mama
[05:27] Kobayashi
    Shouta-kun's father...
[05:29] Kobayashi
    is a mage, right?
[05:32] Elma
    Did you have a look at the
    improvement proposal?
[05:34] Exec
    Yes. It's very well drawn up,
[05:37] Exec
    Joui Elma-kun.
[05:39] Exec
    Or,
[05:41] Exec
    should I call you priestess
    of the holy seas?
[05:43] Elma
    Huh?
[05:46] Elma
    I'm currently an employee here,
     so whichever you prefer.
[05:50] Kobayashi
    Why did you summon us?
[05:52] Exec
    That goddess that Shouta summoned...
[05:55] Exec
    Since she's friends with all of you,
    I wanted to meet you in person.
[05:59] Kobayashi
    She's bad for your son's education, isn't she?
[06:02] Kobayashi
    That pervert,
[06:03] Kobayashi
    or rather, former goddess.
[06:06] Exec
    It's a family rule to take personal
    responsibility for whatever you summon.
[06:10] Exec
    Besides, I believe that woman will be good
    for Shouta's education in several ways.
[06:15] Kobayashi
    Don't come to me when your son
    develops some twisted fetish.
[06:20] Exec
    Now, then,
[06:23] Exec
    shall we discuss business?
[06:29] Kobayashi
    Man, it didn't work out.
[06:32] Takiya
    There would be complaints if it did for
    our department but not the whole company.
[06:36] Takiya
    He was certainly right about that.
[06:38] Kobayashi
    But we did get him to take the time to look
    over the improvement proposal, didn't we?
[06:43] Kobayashi
    Lately we've been getting out
    on time more regularly,
[06:45] Kobayashi
    so eventually—
[06:46] Elma
    No!
[06:46] Elma
    No, not enough!
[06:48] Elma
    We must do anything we can to immediately
    turn this black company white!
[06:51] Kobayashi
    What are you saying?
[06:53] Kobayashi
    You were bought off by
    his luxury chocolates.
SIGN    That is that,
    and this is this
SIGN    Chocolates are low in sugar
SIGN    That is that, and this is this!
SIGN    Chocolates are low in sugar!
[06:59] Kobayashi
    What's that supposed to mean?
SIGN    Even after that...
[07:01] Kobayashi
    Even after accepting his buy-off,
[07:03] Kobayashi
    Elma wouldn't give up.
SIGN    Now is the time to come together! We're holding a meeting for all employees to discuss improvements.
SIGN    There will be tea and sweet snacks!
SIGN    Place: Meeting Room Time: 12:30~13:30
SIGN    Come Forth, Heroes! Let Us Fight Together!
[07:06] Kobayashi
    She tried starting a labor union,
SIGN    Seize Victory And Claim Sweet Days Off! Delicious Food! Reform The Way We Work!
[07:09] Kobayashi
    creating a space for employee discussion,
SIGN    Seize Victory And Claim Sweet Days Off! Delicious Food! Reform The Way We Work!
[07:12] Kobayashi
    and she continued to appeal
    for better working conditions.
[07:15] Kobayashi
    What surprised me was that Tohru
    was helping her with that.
[07:20] Tohru
    If it all goes well, that means
    you'll come home earlier.
[07:20] Elma
    Let us change this company
    together! Labor is—
[07:24] Kobayashi
    So that's why.
[07:25] Tohru
    Don't hold us back, Elma.
[07:29] Elma
    I could say the same to you!
[07:30] Tohru
    Rival forces were cooperating
    for mutual benefit.
[07:33] Tohru
    It made me think it could work.
[07:36] Tohru
    However, our executive
    director was a crafty one!
[07:38] Tohru
    He used both logic and fallacies in the
    right places to parry every claim.
[07:47] Elma
    Damn it! Why?!
[07:52] Kobayashi
    El—
[07:52] Elma
    Now I won't be able to line up
    for the station's limited sweets!
[07:57] Kobayashi
    That was your reason for this?
[08:04] Elma
    I miraculously finished work and made
    it in time for the limited sweets!
SIGN    Time-Limited
[08:10] (Flashback) Customer
    Three, please!
[08:11] (Flashback) Elma
    Three of them?!
SIGN    Time-Limited
[08:12] (Flashback) Customer
    Two, please!
SIGN    Time-Limited
[08:15] (Flashback) Customer
    Two, please!
[08:21] (Flashback) Customer
    Uh, one is fine.
[08:23] (Flashback) Elma
    Thank you so much!
[08:29] Elma
    Today I'm spending my day off
    eating delicious sweets!
[08:34] Elma
    Hmm?
[08:35] Elma
    Hello?
[08:37] Elma
    What's this?!
[08:39] Kanna
    We want to go on a picnic,
[08:41] Kanna
    but we can't go on a long
    trip without an adult.
[08:45] Elma
    What about Miss Kobayashi?
[08:46] Elma
    Oh, she did say she had
    to work on her day off.
[08:50] Elma
    And Tohru?
[08:52] Kanna
    She gave me a letter for you.
[08:54] Elma
    Let's see.
[08:56] Tohru
    Kanna suddenly wanted to go to the mountains
    after watching a survival show.
[09:01] Tohru
    But I have to help out at the maid
    café today, so I can't go with her,
[09:05] Tohru
    so I'd like to ask you to accompany her.
[09:09] Tohru
    I do have some faith in you,
    so try to live up to it.
[09:13] Elma
    Tohru, you have faith in me?
[09:16] Elma
    The oddly condescending
    tone concerns me, though.
[09:19] Elma
    Okay!
[09:19] Elma
    In that case, I'll chaperone you!
[09:21] Kanna
    Yay!
[09:22] Saikawa
    Way to go, Kanna-san!
[09:27] Kanna
    Oh!
[09:32] Shouta
    Let's set up our tent here.
[09:36] Kanna
    We ran into Shouta on
    our way to your house,
[09:40] Kanna
    and he said he'd come along.
[09:41] Elma
    It's nice to have him.
[09:43] Elma
    So, what are you going to do now?
[09:45] Kanna
    Fish!
[09:46] Saikawa
    We rented them.
[09:48] Elma
    Fishing, huh?
[09:48] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, what are you fishing for?
[09:49] Elma
    That takes me back.
[09:50] Kanna
    Anacondas.
[09:51] Elma
    Long ago,
[09:52] Elma
    I got fished out.
[10:08] Saikawa
    I'm bored.
[10:09] Kanna
    That was fast, Saikawa.
[10:10] Saikawa
    Can't we fish anything any faster?
[10:12] Kanna
    Want to catch them by hand?
[10:14] Saikawa
    Maybe that would be good.
[10:16] Elma
    Try further over there.
[10:17] Elma
    There's fish there.
[10:19] Kanna
    Oh!
[10:24] Both
    We caught one!
[10:25] Elma
    Yeah. That's where I would probably go, too.
[10:28] Saikawa
    You would go?
[10:33] Three
    So good!
[10:35] Shouta
    The curry and rice are ready, too.
[10:38] Three
    Yay!
[10:40] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, there's curry on your cheek.
[10:42] Elma
    Chaperoning children is a piece of cake.
[10:46] Elma
    This curry's good.
[10:48] All
    Thank you for the meal.
[10:51] Kanna
    Saikawa, there's a strange bug.
[10:53] Saikawa
    A poisonous bug!
[10:54] Elma
    I think I'll relax a bit, too.
[10:54] Kanna
    Spicy.
[11:02] Kanna
    Shouta, where are you going?
[11:05] Shouta
    Investigating.
[11:06] Shouta
    Lately I've been researching to see
    if I can draw mana from the ley lines.
[11:10] Shouta
    The ley lines run especially
    strongly through the mountains.
[11:13] Kanna
    Sounds fun.
[11:14] Kanna
    I'll go, too!
[11:16] Saikawa
    You boys sure love settings like that.
[11:21] Elma
    Oh, no.
[11:22] Elma
    The children! Where did they go?!
[11:25] Elma
    They disappeared the moment
    I took my eyes off them!
[11:28] Elma
    At this rate...!
[11:29] Tohru
    Huh?
[11:30] Tohru
    You couldn't even handle that?
SIGN    Pathetic
SIGN    Pathetic.
[11:34] Elma
    No!
[11:35] Elma
    That's right, I have my clairvoyance!
[11:37] Elma
    I'll find them in no time with this!
[11:43] Kanna
    What's the matter, Shouta?
[11:45] Shouta
    Someone just tried to peek on us from afar.
[11:48] Shouta
    I'm sure it was Lucoa.
[11:49] Shouta
    She does that from time to time.
[11:51] Shouta
    I blocked it.
[11:52] Kanna
    Oh!
[11:53] Saikawa
    Jeez, you boys.
[11:55] Elma
    Why? I can't sense them...
[11:58] Tohru
    I was wrong to rely on you.
SIGN    Ridiculous
SIGN    Ridiculous.
[12:03] Tohru
    Ridiculous.
[12:07] Elma
    Everyone!
[12:10] Saikawa
    Hey, shouldn't we head back soon?
[12:12] Saikawa
    We might not know how to get back anymore.
[12:15] Shouta
    Oh, we're fine.
[12:17] Shouta
    We followed the ley lines here,
     so if we trace them we'll get back.
[12:20] Saikawa
    You boys.
[12:30] Shouta
    Speaking of which,
[12:31] Shouta
    we left without saying anything to Elma-san.
[12:34] Shouta
    We should hurry back.
[12:36] Saikawa
    Did you two hear a loud cry just now?
[12:39] Shouta
    Maybe there's a bear?
[12:43] Shouta
    All right, we're back.
[12:46] Shouta
    Huh?
[12:47] Shouta
    Elma-san's not here.
[12:48] Shouta
    Did she get mad and go home
    because we left on our own?
[12:51] Saikawa
    She might have gone to look for us.
[12:53] Kanna
    
[12:55] Elma
    Damn it, where did they go?
[12:58] Tohru
    Idiot. Bow before me.
[12:59] Tohru
    Ahh, useless.
[13:00] Tohru
    Worthless.
[13:01] Tohru
    Yes, yes, you did your best
    and it wasn't good enough.
[13:02] Elma
    I keep hearing Tohru being mean in my head!
[13:03] Tohru
    Incompetent fool.
[13:04] Tohru
    You're so funny and dumb!
[13:07] Elma
    You there, I'm looking for someone!
[13:10] Elma
    Have you seen any children?
[13:17] Elma
    Why you...!
[13:18] Elma
    Do you want to get eaten?
[13:25] Elma
    Damn it. One thing after another!
[13:29] Elma
    Where could they be?
[13:31] Elma
    Where are—
[13:35] Elma
    Where are you?!
[13:40] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, look! That's the
    one I saw at the river!
[13:42] Shouta
    Sleep!
[13:46] Kanna
    Lady Elma!
[13:53] Three
    We're sorry.
[13:54] Elma
    I was worried, you know!
[13:56] Three
    Yes.
[13:57] Kanna
    Lady Elma, here.
[14:00] Elma
    What? A flower?
[14:02] Kanna
    I picked it for you.
[14:04] Kanna
    It's yours, so please forgive us.
[14:07] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, what about me?
[14:08] Saikawa
    Hey, what about me?!
[14:18] Elma
    Sweet! I forgive you!
[14:20] Both
    So easy.
[14:22] Kobayashi
    Man, thank you.
[14:25] Kobayashi
    If only I had been at home.
[14:27] Elma
    Please don't worry about it.
[14:29] Elma
    The flower's nectar was rather yummy, anyway.
[14:32] Kobayashi
    Flower's nectar, huh?
[14:33] Kanna
    I picked it!
[14:35] Kobayashi
    Oh? What kind of flower?
[14:35] Elma
    Well, Tohru? I won't let you
    call me pathetic or ridiculous!
[14:37] Kanna
    A big one. It had a really good smell, too!
[14:39] Tohru
    I wouldn't do that anyway.
[14:40] Kobayashi
    Oh?
[14:41] Tohru
    Here, your coffee.
[14:44] Elma
    You're not setting out cake?
[14:45] Tohru
    Don't get carried away.
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[14:54] Ilulu
    It's gotten hot, huh?
[14:57] Taketo
    It is summer already.
SIGN    There Are Various Reasons Behind It (It's Full of Elma)
SIGN    Episode 9
[15:24] Fafnir
    Normally I would never listen to a
    request from a harmony faction dragon,
[15:29] Fafnir
    but I like your choice to rely on power.
[15:32] Fafnir
    I'll accept in honor
    of that spirit, this time.
[15:36] Elma
    You have my gratitude.
[15:41] Reporter
    Today we're here with the mobile
    zoo, "Zoo That Goes Anywhere!"
[15:47] Reporter
    The main attraction is this giraffe!
[15:50] Tohru
    Coming!
[15:53] Tohru
    What are you here for?
[15:58] Reporter
    Now we'd like to talk to the
    zoo director, Miyamoto-san.
[16:06] Kobayashi
    It's unusual for Elma to
    ask Tohru to go somewhere.
[16:10] Kobayashi
    Apparently she said, "I've been getting
    rusty lately, so join me for some exercise."
[16:15] Kobayashi
    It's even more unusual for Tohru
    to genuinely accept such an invitation.
[16:20] Kobayashi
    Maybe the tension between them
    is finally coming undone?
[16:24] Kobayashi
    Her attitude's softened a lot,
[16:26] Kobayashi
    so I'm sure this will be the chance they—
[16:28] Fafnir
    Naive, Kobayashi.
[16:30] Fafnir
    Why do you think the two
    of us were called here?
[16:32] Kobayashi
    Why?
[16:42] Kobayashi
    Tohru!
[16:44] Fafnir
    Kobayashi.
[16:45] Fafnir
    You decide when it's time to stop them.
[17:44] Tohru
    What was that about getting rusty, you liar?
[17:47] Tohru
    Are you trying to settle
    things after all this time?
[17:52] Elma
    If I win, will you return
    to our original world?
[17:55] Tohru
    You're still on about that?
[17:57] Elma
    You really are dangerous.
[17:59] Tohru
    Dangerous?
[18:01] Elma
    You've claimed the hearts of humans.
[18:03] Tohru
    Huh?!
[18:05] Tohru
    You're not making sense!
[18:06] Fafnir
    She may talk about harmony
[18:08] Fafnir
    and guiding mankind,
[18:10] Fafnir
    but that's only because
    it's the position she's in.
[18:14] Fafnir
    She's been used and betrayed.
[18:16] Fafnir
    Somewhere in her heart,
[18:18] Fafnir
    she still distances herself from humans, too.
[18:21] Fafnir
    That's why she still mistrusts Tohru.
[18:25] Kobayashi
    I don't think that's the case.
[18:27] Fafnir
    What?
[18:31] Tohru
    I haven't thought about
    doing anything wrong,
[18:33] Tohru
    and I don't plan on doing
    anything with any humans!
[18:36] Tohru
    I just made a handful of acquaintances!
[18:38] Elma
    I'm surprised you can say that while happily
     working with humans at the maid café!
[18:44] Elma
    After all those times you told
    me you couldn't trust humans,
[18:48] Elma
    now you assert the exact opposite!
[18:50] Elma
    You're the one who made fun of me for
    being worshiped by humans in our original world!
[18:54] Tohru
    That was—!
[18:56] Tohru
    Because it was ridiculous to
    watch you enjoying yourself
[18:58] Tohru
    when you were just being put on a pedestal
[19:00] Tohru
    without actually joining them!
SIGN    Even watching ants would be better than this.
[19:06] Tohru
    But now you don't take
    offerings made to you,
[19:09] Tohru
    you're able to go buy those things yourself!
[19:11] Elma
    But the food I ate back then was better!
[19:15] Tohru
    I can't understand that at all!
[19:21] Elma
    It was better!
[19:25] Tohru
    Then just hurry up and go
    back there on your own!
[19:30] Elma
    It was better because...
[19:32] Elma
    you were there beside me!
[19:36] Elma
    Yet one day you disappeared!
[19:38] Elma
    Do you have any idea how worried
    I was when I heard you had died?
[19:43] Elma
    That's right.
[19:44] Elma
    Then, when I finally found you,
[19:46] Elma
    you were cold to me
[19:48] Elma
    while you were friends with humans.
[19:51] Elma
    That's just...
[19:53] Elma
    That's just...
[19:56] Elma
    Be friends with me like you
    were back in those days,
[19:59] Elma
    you dummy!
[20:10] Tohru
    Sorry.
[20:12] Tohru
    I'm sorry.
[20:14] Elma
    Tohru.
[20:15] Tohru
    But, setting that aside...
[20:21] Elma
    Ow!
[20:22] Tohru
    Let's settle this.
[20:27] Elma
    Fine, then!
[20:28] Elma
    Brace yourself, Tohru!
[20:30] Tohru
    That's my line!
[20:32] Fafnir
    Hmph, this is stupid.
[20:34] Fafnir
    I'm going home.
[20:36] Kobayashi
    Yeah, thanks for coming.
[20:39] Kobayashi
    I've witnessed several
    battles between dragons,
[20:44] Kobayashi
    but I guess I'm rather used to them now.
[20:57] Kobayashi
    This battle
[20:59] Kobayashi
    is reassuring to watch.
[21:07] Elma
    Tohru.
[21:10] Tohru
    What is it?
[21:12] Elma
    I win.
[21:13] Elma
    Treat me to dinner.
[21:15] Tohru
    No, I won.
[21:17] Tohru
    You treat me, please.
[21:18] Elma
    No, I did!
[21:20] Tohru
    I did!
[21:23] Kobayashi
    I'll treat you both.
[21:24] Both
    Yay!
[21:27] Tohru
    Why are you happy about that?
[21:46] Kobayashi
    Okay, that's a draw.
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:21] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi,
[23:22] Elma
    what are you treating us to?
[23:24] Kobayashi
    What do you want eat, Elma?
[23:26] Elma
    Grade A5 Beef!
[23:28] Kobayashi
    Tch!
[23:29] Kobayashi
    You've learned the most useless things!
SIGN    Episode 10
SIGN    Kanna's Summer Break (Broadcast In Two Languages!?)
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Gemini
SIGN    You'll get separated from your family or friends and get lost.
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    If you wait in front of a crepe shop,
    
    you'll be found.
SIGN    Found by Elma, yeah.
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Gemini.

E10 - Kanna's Summer Break (Broadcast In Two Languages!?)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:14] Kanna
    I had a fight with Kobayashi.
[00:18] (Flashback) Kanna
    Kobayashi, you dummy!
[00:20] (Flashback) Kanna
    Buttface!
[00:22] Kanna
    I don't want to go home.
[00:25] Kanna
    But...
[00:25] Kanna
    night is dark and makes me sleepy,
[00:28] Kanna
    so I'll fly somewhere bright.
[00:48] Kanna
    Oh!
[00:49] Kanna
    Lots of people!
[00:51] Kanna
    Lots of buildings, too!
[00:55] Kanna
    Oh!
[02:28] Kanna
    What is this place?
[02:35] Kanna
    It looks fun.
[02:45] Kanna
    I'm hungry.
[02:49] Kanna
    That looks good.
[02:51] Kanna
    595 yen.
[02:55] Vendor
    Hi there. What do you want?
[02:57] Vendor
    Oh... Japanese money?
[02:59] Vendor
    Sorry, you can't use it here.
[03:01] Vendor
    No Japanese yen.
[03:04] Kanna
    The language is different.
[03:06] Vendor
    You alone here? Where's your mom?
[03:07] Man
    Why are you always acting like that?!
[03:09] vendor
    Go and get some U.S. dollars from your mom.
[03:10] woman
    Same to you!
[03:11] Man
    I'm always serious!
[03:11] vendor
    Hot dogs won't go anywhere, so take time.
[03:13] woman
    Why can't you understand?!
[03:15] woman
    It's embarrassing!
[03:15] vendor
    I'll give you a good discount
    when you come back.
[03:16] Man
    Why not?! Let me tell you!
[03:20] Man
    I told you! I love you more!
[03:22] vendor
    What's the matter?
[03:23] vendor
    You okay? You suddenly spaced out.
[03:23] Woman
    Huh?! No, I love you more!
[03:26] Kanna
    Better.
[03:28] vendor
    Like I was saying, you need our
    country's money to buy anything.
[03:37] Kanna
    I can't use money here?
[03:42] Kanna
    Few people here.
[03:45] Chloe
    Somebody, help!
[03:46] PunkA
    Get back here, you little brat!
[03:51] PunkA
    Give up already!
[03:53] Chloe
    Hmph! I'm not letting you catch me!
[03:56] Kanna
    What's going on?
[03:59] Chloe
    Wh-What?! Who are you?!
[04:01] Kanna
    What's going on?
[04:02] Chloe
    Isn't it obvious?!
[04:04] Chloe
    I'm being chased!
[04:05] Chloe
    By bad guys!
[04:06] Kanna
    Mmm, got it.
[04:08] Kanna
    I'll save you.
[04:09] Chloe
    Huh?!
[04:10] Chloe
    Save me? You?
[04:11] PunkA
    Outta our way!
[04:13] PunkA
    Beat it!
[04:19] PunkB
    Michael!
[04:19] PunkC
    Michael!
[04:21] PunkC
    Who is that brat?
[04:22] PunkB
    What the hell did she just do?!
[04:24] PunkB
    How dare you hurt Michael!
[04:26] PunkC
    Michael was already having the runs today!
[04:30] PunkB
    Hey, wai—!
[04:31] Kanna
    Let's go.
[04:33] Chloe
    Huh? Huh?
[04:40] Chloe
    Thank you... for saving me.
[04:46] Chloe
    You're super strong for a child!
[04:49] Chloe
    Wait, this is New York?!
[04:52] Chloe
    Oh, I'm Chloe!
[04:55] Kanna
    Kanna.
[04:57] Chloe
    Kanna!
[04:58] Kanna
    Why were you being chased?
[05:01] Chloe
    I was kidnapped by those men.
[05:04] Chloe
    Apparently they're mafia.
[05:06] Kanna
    Are mafia bad guys?
[05:08] Chloe
    Yes!
[05:09] Chloe
    So I fled when I saw my chance to escape.
[05:11] Kanna
    Poor girl.
[05:13] Chloe
    My papa's the CEO of a big enterprise,
[05:15] Chloe
    but he's been opposing the mafia.
[05:18] Chloe
    I'm sure that's why they did it!
[05:20] Kanna
    Forget about that. Let's play!
[05:22] Chloe
    Forget about that?
[05:24] Kanna
    I was bored.
[05:26] Kanna
    Let's play?
[05:31] Chloe
    Right.
[05:33] Chloe
    Let's play!
[05:34] Kanna
    Oh!
[05:37] Chloe
    I'll treat you to anything
    you'd like as thanks.
[05:40] Kanna
    Yay!
[05:42] Kanna
    Let's go, Chloe!
[05:43] Chloe
    Huh? Sure!
[05:48] Chloe
    This is perfect.
[05:49] Chloe
    It's not like...
[05:50] Chloe
    I want to go home anyway.
[05:56] vendor
    A black card?!
[05:58] vendor
    I'm sorry, we don't take credit cards here.
[06:05] Chloe
    I don't carry much cash on me, though.
[06:10] Chloe
    Either way, this is my
    first time in New York.
[06:13] Chloe
    I usually only ever saw the
    area around our mansion.
[06:17] Kanna
    Are you rich, Chloe?
[06:19] Chloe
    Well, yeah.
[06:20] Kanna
    Same as Saikawa.
[06:21] Kanna
    She always goes,
[06:24] Kanna
    and seems happy.
[06:26] Chloe
    Is that girl okay?
[06:28] Kanna
    She plays with me all the time.
[06:31] Chloe
    There are all kinds of people out there, huh?
[06:32] Kanna
    Mmm.
[07:28] Chloe
    We played and played!
[07:31] Chloe
    It's my first time playing
    with a friend like this!
[07:36] Chloe
    What's the matter, Kanna?
[07:38] Kanna
    I have to go home.
[07:40] Chloe
    Huh?
[07:42] Chloe
    I-It's fine.
[07:44] Chloe
    It's still only a little dark out.
[07:48] Kanna
    No.
[07:49] Kanna
    I had a fight with Kobayashi
    and ran away from home.
[07:54] Kanna
    But I was at fault.
[07:57] Kanna
    I need to go home
[07:59] Kanna
    and apologize.
[08:07] Chloe
    Are you sure it's
[08:09] Chloe
    okay to go home?
[08:12] Chloe
    I mean, what if they're still mad at you?
[08:16] Chloe
    What if they won't forgive
    you after you apologize?
[08:18] Chloe
    Aren't you scared?
[08:23] Kanna
    I am scared,
[08:25] Kanna
    but I'm more scared of having
    no home to return to.
[08:33] Kanna
    Chloe.
[08:36] Kanna
    Let's go home?
[08:42] Chloe
    Kanna.
[08:45] Chloe
    Listen.
[08:47] Chloe
    I-I actually...
[08:50] Chloe
    Huh?
[08:54] Kanna
    Chloe!
[09:12] PunkA
    Tch, Christ!
[09:14] PunkA
    I thought kidnapping a runaway
    would be an easy job.
[09:19] PunkA
    Hey, I think she needs a little
    punishment, don't you?
[09:24] PunkA
    Tie her up good!
[09:26] PunkC
    Okay, Michael!
[09:28] PunkD
    Hey, be careful with the goods, you hear?!
[09:31] PunkA
    Huh? One little arm won't be a big deal.
[09:36] Chloe
    I really do want to go home!
[09:38] Chloe
    I never should have run away!
[09:41] Chloe
    Papa!
[09:44] PunkA
    Hmm?
[09:45] PunkA
    Whoa?! What?!
[09:46] PunkB
    A blackout?!
[09:47] PunkC
    Whoa?! Whoa, it's dark!
[09:47] PunkA
    Hey, go check the breaker!
[09:49] PunkC
    I'll go check the breaker!
[09:51] PunkC
    Ow!
[09:53] PunkA
    Be careful!
[09:56] PunkC
    Sorry about that.
[10:16] Punks
    Run! Move it!
[10:27] Chloe
    I-I don't taste good!
[10:29] Kanna
    Chloe.
[10:30] Chloe
    Huh?
[10:32] Chloe
    That voice...
[10:34] Kanna
    Let's go home.
[10:36] Chloe
    K-Kanna?
[10:45] Chloe
    Kanna, is this a dream?
[10:49] Chloe
    Or have I died and you've
    come for me from heaven?
[10:54] Kanna
    It's not a dream.
[10:56] Kanna
    Which way is your home?
[10:58] Chloe
    It's in Minnesota, so probably that way.
[11:00] Chloe
    It's past the big lake.
[11:03] Kanna
    Got it.
[11:05] Chloe
    So soft and warm.
[11:10] Chloe
    Hey, Kanna...
[11:11] Chloe
    I actually ran away from home, too.
[11:16] Kanna
    You, too?
[11:17] Chloe
    Yeah.
[11:19] Chloe
    I had a fight with my Papa.
[11:21] Chloe
    I wonder how I should apologize.
[11:25] Kanna
    I don't know.
[11:28] Kanna
    But...
[11:30] Kanna
    If they're there for you,
[11:35] Kanna
    even when you get mad
[11:40] Kanna
    and even when you say you hate them...
[11:45] Kanna
    If they're someone like that,
     I'm sure it'll be fine.
[11:50] Chloe
    Yeah.
[11:53] Chloe
    Are you going home already, too?
[11:56] Kanna
    Yeah.
[11:57] Chloe
    Will we see each other again?
[11:59] Kanna
    Don't worry. I'll give you my address.
[12:02] Chloe
    You have an address?
[12:19] Tohru
    Hey. Where have you been?
[12:22] Kanna
    Lady Tohru!
[12:24] Kanna
    I'm sorry.
[12:27] Tohru
    I'm not the one you should
    be apologizing to.
[12:29] Kanna
    Yeah.
[12:31] Kanna
    Lady Tohru, where's Kobayashi?
[12:41] Kanna
    Oh.
[12:46] Tohru
    Have you decided what to say to
    apologize when she wakes up?
[12:49] Kanna
    I don't know.
[12:51] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi said the same thing...
[13:09] Tohru
    I was watching the whole time.
[13:10] Kanna
    Oh!
SIGN    Kanna's Summer Break (Broadcast In Two Languages!?)
SIGN    Episode 10
[13:18] Ilulu
    I'm heading out.
[13:21] Kobayashi
    Take care.
[13:24] Tohru
    Well, Miss Kobayashi,
    I'm heading off to work.
[13:28] Kobayashi
    Take care.
[13:33] Kanna
    It's hot.
[13:34] Announcer
    You can eat fresh fish from
    Hokkaido in the local area.
[13:36] Kobayashi
    Oh, Kanna-chan, you're awake.
[13:38] Kanna
    Morning.
[13:39] Kobayashi
    Morning.
[13:39] Announcer
    I especially recommend this sea urchin!
[13:41] Kanna
    Kobayashi, are you off today?
[13:41] Announcer
    This restaurant prepares
    and serves them on the spot,
[13:44] Kobayashi
    Yeah, good night.
[13:44] Announcer
    so I've ordered some to try for myself.
[13:46] Kanna
    Oh.
SIGN    Seafood You Absolutely Want To Eat This Season Special!!
SIGN    Bright Morning
[13:47] Kobayashi
    I was super busy until yesterday.
SIGN    Sea Urchin
[13:47] Announcer
    Look at this.
[13:50] Kanna
    Death march?
[13:50] Announcer
    Look at this glistening sea urchin!
[13:51] Kobayashi
    Yeah, death march.
[14:03] Announcer
    Next up, we have Komura-san in Kanazawa.
[14:06] Announcer
    Hello. Komura here.
[14:09] Announcer
    Have a look at this line!
[14:09] Kanna
    What about Lady Tohru and Ilulu?
[14:12] Kobayashi
    They're both working until this evening.
[14:12] Announcer
    The flour dumpling with
    bean jam is really popular!
[14:18] Announcer
    Today we're introducing this sweets cafe.
[14:19] Kanna
    Are you going to laze about today?
[14:21] Annoucer
    Now, let's go on in.
[14:22] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[14:23] Annoucer
    There's a secret to the brown sugar syrup
    used in this cafe's flour dumplings with bean jam.
[14:24] Kobayashi
    I'm going to laze about.
[14:26] Kobayashi
    Are you going to go play with Saikawa-san?
SIGN    Gourmets Love! Old Cafe's Flour Dumplings With Bean Jam
[14:27] Annoucer
    See! Have a look!
[14:29] Kanna
    No, Saikawa said she's going on
    a family trip starting today.
[14:29] Annoucer
    Look at this shimmering, thick syrup!
[14:31] Annoucer
    Excuse me. Now to try a bite.
[14:34] Kobayashi
    I see. Nothing to do, then.
[14:34] Annoucer
    Mmm! It's so good!
[14:37] Annoucer
    This brown sugar syrup is so rich!
[14:37] Kanna
    Mmm.
[14:39] Kobayashi
    Bean jam, huh?
[14:39] Announcer
    Yet it's not too sweet... perfect!
[14:41] Kobayashi
    Looks tasty.
[14:42] Kanna
    Yeah.
[14:42] Annoucer
    I can understand why there
    would be such a line for this.
[14:46] Kanna
    Kobayashi, I want to eat a watermelon.
[14:46] Annoucer
    Apparently there are many women lining up,
[14:48] Kobayashi
    Huh? Was there any watermelon
    in that report just now?
[14:49] Announcer
    some of whom have traveled from far away.
[14:51] Kanna
    Lady Tohru bought one yesterday.
[14:53] Kobayashi
    You pay close attention.
[14:55] Kobayashi
    We'll have it for our
    afternoon dessert, then.
SIGN    Hot
SIGN    Hot
[14:57] Kanna
    It's hot.
[14:58] Kanna
    It's... hot.
[15:00] Kanna
    It's... hot.
[15:20] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan?
[15:22] Kanna
    Kobayashi...
[15:27] Kobayashi
    Okay. Let's have lunch!
[15:30] Kanna
    Oh!
[15:31] Kobayashi
    Okay. I'll get things ready,
[15:33] Kobayashi
    so could you go check the mailbox
    downstairs for me, Kanna-chan?
[15:37] Kanna
    Kobayashi, mini tomatoes?
[15:41] Kobayashi
    Tada!
SIGN    Extra Uses
SIGN    Refined By An Old Restaurant
SIGN    Rich Flavor And Strong Body
SIGN    Soumen
[15:42] Kanna
    Easy to make!
[15:54] Kanna
    Ah!
[15:55] Kobayashi
    Wow, air mail, huh?
[15:58] Kobayashi
    Maybe it's from that friend you
    made in New York the other day?
[16:02] Kanna
    Yeah, Chloe.
[16:04] Kanna
    She says she wants to come play at my place.
SIGN    Dear Kanna
SIGN    Chloe
SIGN    Let's play again!
     Chloe
[16:06] Kanna
    Is it okay if I bring her here?
[16:07] Kobayashi
    Sure, of course!
[16:09] Kanna
    Really?! Yay!
[16:12] Kobayashi
    I'm looking forward to it.
SIGN    Salt
[16:18] Both
    So sweet.
[16:22] Kanna
    Kobayashi.
[16:23] Kanna
    We're out of tea.
[16:25] Kobayashi
    Huh, already?
[16:28] Kobayashi
    If I don't make any, we only have milk.
[16:31] Kobayashi
    Oh, well. Let's go buy some.
[16:33] Kanna
    We're going out?!
[16:34] Kobayashi
    We're going out.
[16:36] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan, got your hat?
[16:38] Kanna
    Got it!
[16:42] Kanna
    Kobayashi!
[16:43] Kobayashi
    Yes, yes.
[16:45] Kobayashi
    So hot!
[16:47] Kanna
    Where are we going?
[16:49] Kobayashi
    Hmm, I'll think about
    it as we wander around.
[16:53] Kanna
    Oh!
[16:54] Kanna
    Wandering, wandering, wandering~
[16:59] Kobayashi
    Would be nice if you could use
    it for your picture diary.
[17:02] Kanna
    I'll look for something for
    my independent research, too!
[17:05] Kobayashi
    I hope you find something.
[17:07] Kanna
    Yeah.
[17:08] Kanna
    Lady Tohru said I should research foods
    you might like from the other world.
[17:14] Kobayashi
    I see.
[17:17] Kobayashi
    Let's go with something different.
[17:23] Kanna
    Ants.
[17:24] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[17:25] Kanna
    Lots of them.
[17:29] Kobayashi
    You're right.
[17:30] Kobayashi
    I wonder if they have a
    nest under the manhole?
[17:33] Kanna
    Manhole? That's an ant nest?
[17:35] Kobayashi
    No, it's a hole for a person to use.
[17:39] Kobayashi
    There's a path for sewage beneath here
    that runs all over the city.
[17:44] Kanna
    There are lots of these of lids, then?
[17:46] Kobayashi
    Yeah, there's a whole ton of them.
[17:49] Kanna
    Oh!
[17:50] Kanna
    I'll search for them!
[17:52] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[17:56] Kanna
    There's one here, too!
[17:59] Kobayashi
    I see. Independent research, huh?
[18:02] Kanna
    There, too!
SIGN    Oborozuka
[18:07] Kobayashi
    You see a lot of them in this area.
[18:09] Kanna
    This one's the same.
[18:11] Kanna
    This one's square.
[18:13] Kobayashi
    That's for a fire hydrant.
[18:14] Kanna
    This one's similar, but slightly different.
[18:17] Kobayashi
    K-Kanna-chan...
[18:20] Kanna
    Kobayashi, there's one here, too!
[18:24] Kobayashi
    Yes...
SIGN    Xanadu
[18:29] Kanna
    Kobayashi, you okay?
[18:31] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[18:32] Kobayashi
    That was good exercise for an indoor person.
SIGN    Café
SIGN    X
     a
     n
     a
     d
     u
[18:36] Kobayashi
    Oh!
SIGN    Fire Hydrant
[18:39] Kobayashi
    Ah, so cool!
SIGN    Sting
[18:51] Kobayashi
    Even dragons get brain-freezes, huh?
[18:54] Kanna
    Yours looks yummy, too.
[18:56] Kobayashi
    Want to try some?
[18:58] Kanna
    Yeah!
[19:02] Kanna
    Ah!
SIGN    Construction Notice
SIGN    August 28th
SIGN    Both Lanes Closed For Work On Gas Lines
[19:04] Kanna
    Oh!
[19:07] Kanna
    Kobayashi!
[19:08] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[19:10] Kobayashi
    What is this?
[19:12] Kobayashi
    It's got lots of color!
[19:13] Kanna
    Looks interesting.
[19:14] Kobayashi
    We had something like this here?
[19:17] Kobayashi
    I've lived here so long and never noticed.
[19:20] Kobayashi
    Hey, it's some character, right?
[19:21] Kanna
    It's Mr. Quiet.
[19:23] Kobayashi
    You recognize it?
[19:25] Kanna
    He's the talk of the town.
[19:27] Kobayashi
    Talk of the...?
[19:28] Kanna
    Ah.
[19:32] Kobayashi
    It's pouring!
[19:33] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan!
[19:34] Kanna
    Retreat!
[19:42] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan, you okay?
[19:44] Kanna
    Yeah. I protected my notebook.
[19:46] Kobayashi
    I see!
SIGN    Days Closed During Summer Break
SIGN    July 28th, 29th
SIGN    August 5th, 6th, 12th~16th
SIGN    Mitsuoka Stationery Store
[19:47] Kobayashi
    I got pretty wet.
[19:53] Kobayashi
    What was that? That's nice.
[19:58] Kobayashi
    Well, this is characteristic of summer.
[20:02] Kanna
    Characteristic?
[20:05] Kanna
    Rain, rain, rain, rain,
[20:09] Kanna
    let it pour!
[20:11] Kobayashi
    That's a mean song.
[20:12] Kanna
    Howl away, thunder and strong, strong rain.
[20:16] Director
    Not good! Not good for the equipment!
[20:18] Director
    Watch your feet!
[20:19] Kanna
    It's Mr. Quiet.
[20:21] Director
    Head, head!
[20:23] Quiet
    Hey, pushing! Don't push me!
[20:23] Kobayashi
    That's what the manhole picture was of?
[20:24] Assistant
    Please lower your head!
[20:32] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[20:33] Kanna
    Ladybug.
[20:34] Kobayashi
    You're right.
[20:36] Kobayashi
    It got washed away.
[20:38] Kanna
    Is it dead?
[20:39] Kobayashi
    Hmm...
[20:42] Kobayashi
    It's alive!
[20:43] Kanna
    Yay.
[20:50] Kanna
    It's gone.
[20:52] Kobayashi
    It must have gone back home.
[20:54] Kanna
    It has a home?
[20:56] Kobayashi
    I'm sure it does.
[20:58] Kanna
    Oh!
[21:02] Kanna
    Rainbow!
[21:06] Kobayashi
    That is a rainbow.
[21:08] Kanna
    Yeah.
[21:09] Kobayashi
    It's completely stopped now.
[21:12] Kobayashi
    Tohru and the others should
    be getting home soon.
[21:15] Kobayashi
    Kanna.
[21:18] Kobayashi
    Let's go home for today!
[21:24] Kanna
    Let's go home!
[21:29] Kanna
    Next time I'm bringing a camera, too.
[21:32] Kobayashi
    You should.
[21:34] Kobayashi
    We're home.
[21:34] Kanna
    We're home.
[21:36] Tohru
    Welcome home.
[21:37] Ilulu
    You're late! Let's have dinner!
[21:39] Kanna
    I'm hungry.
[21:40] Tohru
    Where did you two go?
[21:42] Kobayashi
    Hmm, here and there.
[21:44] Kanna
    It was fun.
[21:45] Kobayashi
    Right?
[21:46] Tohru
    What is this?! Not fair!
[21:47] Ilulu
    Dinner!
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:21] Kanna
    It's wicked!
[23:22] Kobayashi
    Huh? What's wrong?
[23:24] Kanna
    Sorry, I haven't shaken my
    habits from the Big Apple.
[23:27] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan, you're too easily influenced.
[23:28] Kanna
    It's time for me to head
    to a party with a friend.
[23:31] Kobayashi
    You're going over to
    Saikawa-san's to play, right?
SIGN    Episode 11
SIGN    Premium Seat (No Extra Charge)
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Virgo
SIGN    (That's Wicked)
SIGN    (Lucky Advice)
SIGN    (Good Luck)
SIGN    English please.
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Virgo.

E11 - Premium Seat (No Extra Charge)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] Announcer
    It's okay to do this while sitting down.
[00:03] Announcer
    Now make sure to stretch
    out your side muscles.
[00:06] Announcer
    1, 2, 3... 1, 2, 3...
SIGN    Crack
[00:10] Announcer
    Please try not to put too
    much effort into it.
[00:13] Kobayashi
    Not good.
[00:14] Kobayashi
    The damage is seriously building up.
[00:16] Kobayashi
    I need to think of something
    or I might be in trouble.
[00:19] Kobayashi
    If I don't, I'll be forced to eat that.
[00:22] Kobayashi
    Take it away.
[00:24] Tohru
    Huh?
[01:56] Kobayashi
    Wow, there are all kinds
    of relaxation devices.
SIGN    Premium Massage Chair
SIGN    Massage Pillow
SIGN    Soft and Fluffy
SIGN    Very Plush
SIGN    Kneading Chair
SIGN    Massaging Rollers
SIGN    Shoulder Massage Fit
[02:01] Kobayashi
    Hmm? What's this?
SIGN    Any place, Any time
SIGN    3 Settings
[02:03] Kobayashi
    You use it like this?
SIGN    Double Points When You Buy Both As a Set
SIGN    Back Muscle Strengthening Belt Makes It 10x Effective!
SIGN    Super Spine 2
SIGN    New Model On the Market!
SIGN    Relaxation Mode Hard Mode Super Hard Mode Adjustable Stages!
[02:06] Kobayashi
    This looks good, too.
SIGN    Works On Stiff, Knotted Shoulders!
SIGN    You Can Count On Improved Blood Flow As it Stimulates Key Points!
SIGN    Soft Cushion Type
[02:08] Kobayashi
    That might be good, as well.
[02:09] Kobayashi
    And this one...
[02:10] Kobayashi
    That, too.
[02:11] Kobayashi
    That one, too.
[02:12] Kobayashi
    They're all...
SIGN    Several Days Later
[02:12] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi,
[02:14] Tohru
    what are you going to do with
    this mountain of devices?
[02:18] Kobayashi
    I'll use them all.
[02:20] Tohru
    Will you really?
[02:21] Tohru
    You've never used this one at all, you know?
[02:24] Kobayashi
    I'll use it one day.
[02:25] Ilulu
    Want me to pound you?
[02:27] Ilulu
    My grandma often had me pound
    her shoulders long ago.
[02:31] Kobayashi
    Grandma?
[02:32] Ilulu
    Does that feel good, Kobayashi?
[02:34] Kobayashi
    It's pretty good,
[02:35] Kobayashi
    but move your breasts.
[02:38] Kanna
    Me, too!
[02:39] Kobayashi
    Sorry.
[02:41] Tohru
    Me, too!
[02:46] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, lately I've been thinking.
[02:50] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[02:51] Tohru
    I'm always thinking about how to serve you,
[02:55] Tohru
    but that's just pushing my own
    feelings onto you, isn't it?
[02:58] Tohru
    To truly serve you, I think I
    need to consider how you feel,
[03:02] Tohru
    and what you would like me to do.
[03:06] Kobayashi
    She's suddenly gotten serious.
[03:08] Tohru
    So—
[03:09] Kobayashi
    That, still?!
[03:10] Kobayashi
    You're not sharing my feelings, either!
[03:13] Tohru
    You're a kind a person and that's
    why you won't eat me, isn't it?
[03:18] Kobayashi
    If only you really understood the reason.
[03:21] Tohru
    If I really?
SIGN    Drunken Dragon's Den
[03:24] Tohru
    So, I called you fools here since
    you work with Miss Kobayashi.
[03:29] Both
    Be less rude when referring to us.
[03:32] Takiya
    Kobayashi-san's lower back, huh?
[03:35] Takiya
    It's true she's been working a lot lately.
[03:38] Elma
    Our sales team is talented, but—
[03:40] Tohru
    Enough with the business talk.
[03:42] Elma
    Then, there is one thing I've noticed.
[03:45] Tohru
    What's that?
[03:46] Elma
    Miss Kobayashi has bad posture.
[03:48] Tohru
    What does that have to do
    with her lower back hurting?
[03:50] Elma
    Well, humans' backs get hurt just
    from sitting with bad posture.
[03:56] Tohru
    What?!
[03:57] Takiya
    It would be good to get
    a different chair, too.
[03:59] Tohru
    Chair?
[04:00] Takiya
    Kobayashi-san uses the
    company's office chair.
[04:04] Takiya
    I've been telling her she
    should get a better one.
[04:07] Elma
    But chairs are expensive.
[04:09] Tohru
    They're expensive?
[04:10] Tohru
    Is Miss Kobayashi the type
    to buy lots of things
[04:13] Tohru
    while trying to keep them cheap?
[04:15] Takiya
    Yeah, she is the type to drink
    cheap liquor bit by bit.
[04:19] Tohru
    She could cure her back if
    she just ate my tail, too!
[04:24] Elma
    No, she'd upset her stomach.
[04:25] Tohru
    Well, there's something good for
    Miss Kobayashi's lower back in our world,
[04:30] Tohru
    so I'll get it again.
[04:31] Takiya
    I don't think that's a good idea, is it?
[04:35] Takiya
    Are you familiar with the story
    of eating the food of the dead?
[04:39] Takiya
    If you eat the meat boiled in
    a pot in the land of the dead,
[04:43] Takiya
    you'll become a resident of that land.
[04:46] Tohru
    You're saying I'm doing the same thing?
[04:48] Elma
    A journey to the underworld, huh?
[04:50] Elma
    Does that make Miss Kobayashi Persephone?
[04:52] Takiya
    Maybe not quite Persephone,
[04:55] Takiya
    but she's close to Demophon, isn't she?
[04:57] Tohru
    Phew.
[04:58] Tohru
    Some things don't work out, even if
    you think it's for the best, huh?
[05:02] Tohru
    I'll go home and revise my strategy a bit.
[05:06] Tohru
    Mister Takiya can pay.
SIGN    Drunken Dragon's Den
[05:09] Elma
    Still, I didn't think you'd be so
    good at guiding one's point of view.
[05:14] Takiya
    Well, it's just logic.
[05:17] Takiya
    When your emotions are heightened,
    you can easily overstep.
[05:21] Takiya
    So, it's concerning.
[05:24] Tohru
    Mister Takiya was sharp.
[05:27] Tohru
    Honestly, that hit me a little hard.
[05:31] Tohru
    I don't see what's wrong
    with using all your power
[05:34] Tohru
    to make someone precious to you happy.
[05:38] Tohru
    That's what I thought,
[05:40] Tohru
    but if Miss Kobayashi doesn't want that,
[05:42] Tohru
    then it's just being meddlesome.
[05:45] Tohru
    I've been eating the food of this
    world without any concern,
[05:50] Tohru
    and I'm fine with that.
[05:52] Tohru
    But I want Miss Kobayashi
    to remain in this world.
[05:58] Tohru
    I'm home!
[05:59] Kobayashi
    Welcome home.
[06:02] Tohru
    Oh, you're using that?
[06:05] Kobayashi
    This actually works pretty well.
[06:08] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi.
[06:12] Kobayashi
    I'm not eating it.
[06:13] Tohru
    No, please rest your back against it.
[06:24] Kobayashi
    This one's more effective.
[06:28] Tohru
    Is this enough for you?
[06:31] Kobayashi
    Yeah, this is perfect.
[06:35] Tohru
    So that's all you want?
[06:37] Kobayashi
    That it is.
[06:44] Tohru
    All right. I'll do this, then.
[06:49] Kobayashi
    I'm feeling a lot better.
[06:51] Kobayashi
    Would you like me to massage you in return?
[06:53] Tohru
    Huh?! Uhh, my shoulders, then?
[06:57] Kobayashi
    Oh, because your breasts are heavy?
[07:00] Kobayashi
    Is it because your breasts are heavy?
SIGN    Premium Seat (No Extra Charge)
SIGN    Episode 11
[07:07] Kobayashi
    What are you writing?
[07:10] Tohru
    A grimoire for perception blocking and such.
[07:12] Kobayashi
    Oh, that convenient magic.
[07:16] Tohru
    I was thinking of teaching
    it to Kanna and Ilulu.
[07:20] Kobayashi
    You really care for your
    friends, huh, Tohru.
[07:22] Tohru
    Oh, all that praise will get
    you is my flesh and blood!
[07:26] Kobayashi
    Don't give me that!
[07:27] Tohru
    You don't need to be so
    bashful, Miss Kobayashi.
[07:39] Kobayashi
    I knew it...
[07:42] Kobayashi
    Why do the lines of magic spells
[07:44] Kobayashi
    and the lines of code in the programming
    language we developed in-house...
[07:48] Exec
    Resemble each other?
[07:50] Kobayashi
    Yes.
[07:51] Exec
    That's simple.
[07:54] Exec
    Because it was developed by us mages.
[07:59] Kobayashi
    Really?
[08:01] Exec
    Are you interested in this side of things?
[08:05] Exec
    If so, then you probably
    want to know at this point.
[08:08] Kobayashi
    Know what?
[08:10] Exec
    Know why Tohru-sama came to our world.
[08:15] Kobayashi
    I'll hear that from Tohru herself.
[08:17] Exec
    Then, how about the
    experiences of her family?
[08:20] Kobayashi
    Huh?
SIGN    Emperor of Demise
[08:32] Kobayashi
    Tohru's father...
[08:34] Kobayashi
    It's been a while.
[08:36] Kobayashi
    Why are you here?
[08:38] Demise
    This man and I are friends.
[08:41] Demise
    He was telling me all about
    how Tohru's been doing.
[08:44] Kobayashi
    That so?
[08:45] Demise
    If you've come to this room,
[08:48] Demise
    that means you're here
    to ask something, right?
[08:50] Kobayashi
    Well, yes...
[08:52] Kobayashi
    But I'll hear it directly from
    Tohru after this, as well.
[08:57] Demise
    Mhmm,
[09:01] Demise
    very well.
[09:06] Demise
    The battle was never-ending.
[09:09] Demise
    It was nothing more than a long battle
    of us occasionally gathering forces,
[09:12] Demise
    clashing against them,
    and wearing ourselves out.
[09:17] Demise
    The reason we fought was to defeat the gods
[09:20] Demise
    and restore the world to a
    state without any conductors.
[09:24] Demise
    We bared our fangs because we hated
    the thought of being controlled,
[09:29] Demise
    and we tried to seize our freedom.
[09:34] Demise
    At first, all dragons were
    unified behind that.
[09:37] Demise
    But as it drew on, some changed
    sides and sided with the gods,
[09:42] Demise
    and we saw some grow sick of the fighting
    and refuse to take part on either side.
[09:48] Demise
    Now those are called the Harmony
    Faction and the Spectator Faction
[09:54] Demise
    and, because of that,
[09:57] Demise
    we too came to be called the Chaos Faction...
[10:01] Demise
    those who would plunge
     the world into chaos.
[10:06] Demise
    We would fight for several centuries,
[10:09] Demise
    then wait several centuries
    to build up our forces.
[10:12] Demise
    While all of that was
    happening, I had a child.
[10:17] Demise
    Her name was Tohru.
[10:20] Demise
    Her name comes from an
    author from this world.
[10:24] Kobayashi
    You named Tohru after a
    human from our world?
[10:30] Demise
    Indeed, I did.
[10:32] Demise
    And long ago this man here
    used his clairvoyance
[10:37] Demise
    to read that book from the future
    and sell it across our world.
[10:42] Demise
    It's what you would call plagiarism.
[10:45] Exec
    The copyright to an author's works
    disappears with time after their death, right?
[10:49] Exec
    So it's not a problem if I sell it in another
    world well before the book is ever written.
[10:55] Exec
    I can't live without funds for my research.
[10:58] Kobayashi
    Director...
[11:01] Demise
    Humans...
[11:03] Demise
    At the time I didn't think anything of them.
[11:07] Demise
    They occasionally did amusing things
    or created interesting things.
[11:12] Demise
    That's all I thought of them.
[11:16] Demise
    There were some among them
    who worshiped the gods,
[11:17] Woman
    Behold!
[11:20] Demise
    but they were nothing compared
    to dragons as an opposing force.
[11:22] Woman
    Witness the grand figure
    of the lord who guides us!
[11:25] Demise
    That's why I ignored them,
[11:29] Demise
    but it became a different
    story when the humans
[11:33] Demise
    joined forces with the Harmony Faction.
[11:35] Demise
    Those in the Chaos Faction
    began spreading the idea
[11:39] Demise
    that humans were an evil we should destroy.
[11:43] (Flashback) Tohru
    Father, Father, what kind
    of creatures are humans?
[11:48] (Flashback) Demise
    They're nothing but evil.
[11:50] (Flashback) Demise
    They should be destroyed.
[11:53] Demise
    I thought I had to go along with the
    faction lest Tohru be persecuted.
[11:59] Tohru
    Perish, rock!
[12:00] Demise
    Tohru was stuck in the framework of dragon
    society from the moment she was born,
[12:01] Tohru
    Perish!
[12:05] Demise
    and I also felt I had burdened her with
    the fact that she was my daughter.
[12:11] Tohru
    Perish!
[12:13] Demise
    Perhaps the part of me which thought that
    was a bad thing had been influenced by humans.
[12:22] Demise
    So, I decided to let Tohru act freely.
[12:27] Demise
    I wanted her to visit all kinds of places,
[12:29] Demise
    interact with all kinds of things,
    and develop her own ideas.
[12:34] Demise
    Tohru learned anything she was
    interested in without bias.
[12:39] Demise
    I thought that she would
    eventually come to question
[12:42] Demise
    the Chaos Faction's contempt toward humans.
[12:47] Demise
    But Tohru lost control.
[12:50] Kobayashi
    Lost control?
[12:51] Demise
    She stormed the gods' camp all alone.
[12:58] Demise
    There, she was deeply wounded and
    then she escaped into this world.
[13:03] Kobayashi
    And that's when she met me.
[13:06] Demise
    Yes.
[13:08] Demise
    Though I was surprised, too.
[13:10] Demise
    I never even imagined such strong bonds
    could form between humans and dragons.
[13:18] Kobayashi
    But why did Tohru do such a thing?
[13:22] Demise
    Tohru wanted to end the fighting
    more than anyone else.
[13:29] Demise
    "If I crush the gods,
    the fighting will end."
[13:33] Demise
    That must be what she thought.
[13:40] Kobayashi
    Heavy.
[13:42] Kobayashi
    This is damn heavy.
[13:45] Demise
    That's the general overview.
[13:47] Demise
    You'll have to ask Tohru if you want
    to know her feelings in detail.
[13:52] Kobayashi
    Please tell me one thing.
[13:54] Demise
    What's that?
[13:56] Kobayashi
    When I met Tohru, she said
    she was all alone now.
[14:01] Kobayashi
    What do you think she meant by that?
[14:04] Demise
    All alone?
[14:06] Demise
    Well, I can hardly surmise Tohru's feelings.
[14:11] Demise
    To speak from a human's point of view,
     I would be a bad father.
[14:14] Kobayashi
    I think you're one of
    the better ones, though.
[14:17] Demise
    Tohru's battle was not the will
    of any faction, only her own.
[14:22] Demise
    She fought of her own volition.
[14:26] Demise
    Just as every dragon did
    when it all first started.
[14:31] Demise
    Well, I should go.
[14:38] Demise
    I'll also say this:
[14:40] Demise
    I'll never approve of you two.
[14:45] Kobayashi
    Y-Yes.
[14:48] Exec
    Despite what you may think,
[14:51] Exec
    he's made several arrangements
    with the God of this world for her.
[14:54] Kobayashi
    Wow.
[14:55] Demise
    Make sure you take proper care of
    Tohru until your lifespan runs out.
[15:02] Kobayashi
    Oh, yes, I'll watch over her.
[15:31] Kobayashi
    I'm home.
[15:33] Tohru
    Welcome home, Miss Kobayashi.
[15:36] Kobayashi
    Your father came to our
    company today, Tohru.
[15:40] Kobayashi
    I heard about what happened
    before you came here from him.
[15:44] Kobayashi
    So, if you'd be okay with it that is,
[15:49] Kobayashi
    I'm curious to hear why you came here.
[15:53] Kobayashi
    It would be nice if you could tell me yourself,
    whenever you feel like talking about it.
[16:02] Kobayashi
    No, you don't have to force yourself.
[16:05] Kobayashi
    If you don't want to talk about it,
    that's fine, too. Honestly.
[16:13] Tohru
    You want to know?
[16:15] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[16:17] (Flashback) Tohru
    Magic to look like a human?
[16:23] Dragon
    You succeeded on the first try?
SIGN    Tohru
[16:26] (Flashback) Dragon
    You really are a genius.
[16:29] (Flashback) Dragon
    Your father said you should
    go visit all kinds of places.
[16:34] (Flashback) Dragon
    Heh, does the Emperor of Demise want
    his daughter to become a Spectator?
[16:42] Tohru
    That was how I started my journey.
[16:49] Tohru
    Humans were everywhere I went.
[16:53] (Flashback) Tohru
    People are so foolish.
[16:55] (Flashback) Tohru
    They're fighting today, as well.
[16:57] (Flashback) Tohru
    They're always fighting over
    things like land or authority.
[17:02] (Flashback) Tohru
    Though, they do create all
    kinds of interesting things.
[17:06] Tohru
    That was my impression as a dragon.
SIGN    Kanna Kamui
[17:12] Kanna
    Wady Toohu.
[17:14] (Flashback) Tohru
    I'm Tohru...
[17:15] (Flashback) Kanna
    Tohu?
[17:17] (Flashback) Tohru
    That's close enough.
[17:19] (Flashback) Tohru
    But... Kanna, was it? Why do you
    use magic to become human?
[17:24] (Flashback) Kanna
    I can do lots of detailed
    things with human hands.
[17:28] (Flashback) Kanna
    Like pranks.
[17:32] (Flashback) Tohru
    The previous Kanna Kamui?
[17:35] (Flashback) Tohru
    What kind of pranks?
[17:37] (Flashback) Kanna
    Collecting bugs and surprises!
[17:39] (Flashback) Tohru
    That's childish.
[17:46] (Flashback) Kanna
    I want attention.
[17:51] (Flashback) Tohru
    They probably didn't have time,
    with preparations for battle.
[17:54] (Flashback) Tohru
    Even though they usually only clash
    once every few centuries, if at all.
[18:00] (Flashback) Lucoa
    I don't like fighting.
[18:02] Tohru
    You're a coward, Quetzalcoatl.
SIGN    Quetzalcoatl
[18:05] (Flashback) Tohru
    You're so strong, but you won't
    participate in any battles.
[18:08] (Flashback) Lucoa
    I hate fighting.
[18:10] (Flashback) Lucoa
    Looking in from the outside,
    it's all so pointless.
[18:14] (Flashback) Lucoa
    Tohru, you should quit the Chaos Faction.
[18:22] Tohru
    I'm the daughter of the Emperor of Demise,
[18:24] Tohru
    the representative of the Chaos Faction.
[18:27] Tohru
    If his daughter ran from the faction,
[18:28] Tohru
    then my father's position
    would be in jeopardy.
[18:31] (Flashback) Fafnir
    Absurd!
SIGN    Fafnir
[18:32] Fafnir
    If you can't live your life the way you want,
    then you fail as a dragon!
[18:37] (Flashback) Fafnir
    The fact that you were put in that
    position by others must be annoying.
[18:41] (Flashback) Tohru
    Is that how it works?
[18:42] (Flashback) Fafnir
    You may be a dragon,
    but you live too selflessly.
[18:47] (Flashback) Fafnir
    If any stand in the way of what
    you want to do, kill them all.
[18:50] (Flashback) Fafnir
    Even if they're your parents.
[18:53] (Flashback) Fafnir
    That's what dragons do.
[18:55] (Flashback) Tohru
    That's extreme.
[19:02] (Flashback) Elma
    Tohru.
SIGN    Elma
[19:05] Elma
    I can't keep going with you anymore.
[19:09] Elma
    It's over.
[19:10] (Flashback) Tohru
    Yeah.
[19:11] (Flashback) Elma
    Position, huh?
[19:14] (Flashback) Elma
    You do have a point to what you've said,
[19:17] (Flashback) Elma
    and maybe I have been getting
    used by others, too.
[19:21] (Flashback) Elma
    But I don't think that's foolish.
[19:25] (Flashback) Elma
    Prayers are precious,
[19:27] (Flashback) Elma
    which is why it felt good to help humans.
[19:30] (Flashback) Tohru
    You got to eat your fill, too.
[19:35] (Flashback) Elma
    Tohru,
[19:36] (Flashback) Elma
    I was glad you made your own
    decision to travel with me.
[19:50] (Flashback) Tohru
    I couldn't choose anything.
[19:54] (Flashback) Tohru
    I see.
[19:55] Tohru
    I didn't like it,
[19:58] Tohru
    that lack of freedom.
[20:00] Tohru
    I didn't want the Chaos Faction and
    Harmony Faction to fight each other.
[20:04] Tohru
    That wasn't my will.
[20:07] Tohru
    It felt good having a friend
    so close we could fight.
[20:10] Tohru
    I respect my Father,
[20:13] Tohru
    but the chains of being the Emperor
    of Demise's daughter are in the way.
[20:17] Tohru
    I want to live freely.
[20:19] Tohru
    I want to be by myself.
[20:22] Tohru
    I'm a dragon.
[20:24] Tohru
    So, I'll fight and win it for myself.
[20:27] Tohru
    The factions don't matter.
[20:29] Tohru
    This is my personal fight.
[20:31] Tohru
    I'm going to wipe these guys out and
    break all the chains clinging to dragons.
[20:36] Tohru
    I'm going to be free.
[20:38] Tohru
    And then...
[20:39] Tohru
    And then...?
[20:46] Tohru
    I didn't have anything.
[20:49] Tohru
    Once I was all alone, I found
    there was nothing I wanted to do.
[20:54] Tohru
    Being alone, being free, was pretty scary.
[21:10] Tohru
    That's what it was like.
[21:12] Tohru
    Yet while I feared my
    freedom, you took my hand,
[21:16] Tohru
    and gently pulled me close.
[21:20] Kobayashi
    I see.
[21:22] Kobayashi
    It's similar to how I had nothing I wanted
    to do after I came to the big city.
[21:26] Tohru
    I know now, though.
[21:28] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[21:30] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi,
[21:34] Tohru
    I wanted to be a maid.
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:20] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, I heard they'll be launching
    fireworks at the summer festival.
[23:24] Kobayashi
    Yeah, they do.
[23:25] Tohru
    I think my breath would
    be more amazing, though.
[23:28] Kobayashi
    That would turn it into a blood festival.
[23:29] Tohru
    But I hear the sights you see on
    the verge of death are beautiful.
SIGN    Final Episode
SIGN    Life Is Constant Change (But It's Okay To Stop And Appreciate It)
[23:32] Kobayashi
    Why are you competing with them?
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Scorpio
SIGN    You'll Get Messaged By a Troll
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    Curse Them. Curse Their Predecessors Too,
    And Wipe Out Their Entire Lineage!
SIGN    That sounds incredibly real... Have you been trolled?
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Scorpio.

E12 - Life is Constant Change (But It's Okay To Stop And Appreciate It)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:06] Kanna
    Swirl, swirl, swirl, swirl
[00:08] Kanna
    the polyglutamic acid,
[00:10] Kanna
    breaking it up into glutamic acid.
[00:13] Ilulu
    Destruction is the essence of dragons.
[00:16] Ilulu
    Is it ready now?
[00:17] Kanna
    More.
[00:19] Tohru
    Good morning, Miss Kobayashi.
[00:21] Kanna
    Morning, Kobayashi.
[00:23] Ilulu
    Morning.
[00:24] Kobayashi
    Morning.
[00:26] Tohru
    Today I made some okra miso soup,
     since it's summer.
[00:29] Kobayashi
    Yeah, thanks.
SIGN    Oborozuka Big Festival
[00:31] Ilulu
    Hey, there's something called a
    summer festival coming up, right?
[00:34] Ilulu
    Take mentioned it.
[00:35] Kanna
    Mm, I promised to go with Saikawa.
[00:38] Ilulu
    What do you do there?
[00:40] Kanna
    I heard they open up lots
     of these things called stalls!
[01:29] Kobayashi
    Hey, Takiya-kun.
[01:31] Takiya
    Hmm?
[01:32] Kobayashi
    What do you do when
    relationships get serious?
[01:35] Takiya
    Huh? Well...
[01:37] Takiya
    Go with the flow, I guess?
[01:42] Kobayashi
    I see.
[01:47] Kobayashi
    I see.
SIGN    Oborozuka Big Festival
[01:56] Kobayashi
    Oh, yeah, they were talking
    about that this morning.
[02:00] Kobayashi
    Guess I'll go with Tohru.
[02:02] Kobayashi
    Yukata... guess I'll buy some.
[02:05] Kobayashi
    I won't wear one, though.
[02:09] Kobayashi
    They're already decorating.
[02:14] Kobayashi
    Tohru? Why?
[02:17] Tohru
    The people from the shopping
    district asked for my help.
[02:20] Kobayashi
    Wow. They have a lot of faith in you.
[02:22] Tohru
    I don't care if it's for the festival.
     It's a huge bother.
[02:26] Kobayashi
    Really? You were smiling, though.
[02:28] Tohru
    Because that's the street you pass through.
[02:31] Tohru
    The thought of you walking under
    the decorative lights I hung up...
[02:35] Kobayashi
    That's poetic.
[02:36] Kobayashi
    Are you doing anything on the day of?
[02:38] Tohru
    Apparently, the girls from the maid
    café will have a stall there,
[02:41] Tohru
    so I'll probably help them out.
[02:43] Kobayashi
    Hmm.
[02:45] Kobayashi
    Lately Tohru's been doing well, hasn't she?
[02:50] Kobayashi
    She's taking initiative to interact
    with the people in this town,
[02:53] Kobayashi
    she's working with them to build up trust,
[02:56] Kobayashi
    and she's living up to their faith.
[02:58] Kobayashi
    I guess that's easy enough to
    do with the power of a dragon.
[03:03] Kobayashi
    I think those are all good changes.
[03:06] Kobayashi
    It's just...
[03:08] Kobayashi
    It just makes me think about it again.
[03:11] Kobayashi
    About whether or not I'm
    worthy of Tohru's affection.
[03:15] Kobayashi
    No, I guess it's a little different.
[03:18] Kobayashi
    As she's started bothering me
    less and less, I'm feeling a bit...
[03:22] Kobayashi
    lonely, I think?
[03:25] Kobayashi
    Well, I'll just swallow that down.
SIGN    Oborozuka Big Festival
[03:41] Kanna
    I want this one.
[03:43] Kobayashi
    Yeah, it's cute.
[03:45] Kanna
    Yay!
[03:46] Ilulu
    Kobayashi!
[03:47] Ilulu
    How about this one?
[03:49] Kobayashi
    I think that'll look good on you, Ilulu.
[03:51] Ilulu
    I see.
[03:52] Kanna
    What about you?
     Aren't you wearing a yukata?
[03:55] Kobayashi
    Hmm, no, I'm fine.
[03:57] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi!
[03:58] Tohru
    Which one do you think is best?
[04:00] Kobayashi
    You should choose the one you like most.
[04:02] Tohru
    I want you to pick for me!
[04:05] Kobayashi
    Huh? Then...
[04:07] Kobayashi
    Eenie meenie miney mo,
[04:10] Kobayashi
    ask God in Heaven if he knows...
[04:13] Kobayashi
    Okay, this one.
[04:17] Tohru
    I'll never do what that bastard says!
[04:19] Tohru
    I'm getting this one!
[04:20] Kobayashi
    Sure.
SIGN    Skewers
SIGN    Candied
    Apples
SIGN    Salted
    Beef
    Tongue
    Skewers
SIGN    Pork
    Rib
    Skewers
SIGN    Local
    Chicken
    Skewers
[04:32] Kobayashi
    You're excited, Elma.
[04:34] Elma
    I love festivals!
[04:36] Kobayashi
    What were festivals like in your world?
[04:39] Elma
    Uhh, if I recall...
[04:40] Elma
    There was whole roasted pig, baked chicken,
[04:42] Kobayashi
    She only remembers the food.
[04:43] Elma
    grape juice, and this and
    that and the other...
[04:45] Kanna
    Oh, there's Lady Tohru!
[04:47] Tohru
    Here you go, our maid café's
    special omelet rice!
[04:50] Kanna
    Lady Tohru!
[04:53] Tohru
    Ohh, you came by.
[04:55] Kobayashi
    Why are you dressed like a festival
    leader instead of a maid?
[04:59] Tohru
    Huh? Maid outfits are hard
    to move around in, right?
[05:02] Kobayashi
    You went and said it, you bastard...
SIGN    Omelet Rice 400 yen
[05:04] Tohru
    What matters most is the heart!
[05:06] Elma
    Omelet rice! Give me one, too!
[05:08] Tohru
    Please wait in line for it.
[05:10] Elma
    Hmm?
SIGN    End of the Line Starts Here
SIGN    Beef Steak Skewers
SIGN    Takoyaki
[05:13] Ilulu
    You're popular.
[05:16] Elma
    If I line up here, I might miss out
    on eating the grilled corn, grilled squid,
[05:18] Elma
    okonomiyaki, candied apples,
    and all kinds of other food!
[05:22] Tohru
    You're hopeless.
[05:24] Tohru
    I'll bring you some as a
    souvenir when I get off.
[05:27] Elma
    Really?!
[05:28] Elma
    Tohru, you're such a good person!
[05:29] Tohru
    Is it worth crying over?
[05:31] Tohru
    Oh, I'll be getting off in a hour.
[05:34] Kobayashi
    Got it.
SIGN    Oborozuka Pharmacy
SIGN    Tatsuda Butchery
SIGN    Oborozuka
    Fishmonger
[05:53] Elma
    I can't get enough of the
    smell of this soy sauce.
[05:56] Kobayashi
    Good for you.
[05:57] Lucoa
    Hey, hey.
[05:59] Kobayashi
    Lucoa-san, Shouta-kun.
[06:01] Shouta
    Good evening.
[06:02] Lucoa
    Festivals are great, aren't they?
[06:05] Kobayashi
    Really?
[06:06] Lucoa
    Yeah, though they're
     a little different here.
[06:09] Elma
    In our original world many festivals
    were held to celebrate the gods.
[06:12] Kobayashi
    Wow. Lately those sentiments have
    been declining here in Japan.
[06:16] Elma
    Celebrating the gods made security
    tight and dragons couldn't get close.
[06:20] Lucoa
    Yeah.
[06:21] Lucoa
    In the big country up north they
    held a big festival in the spring.
[06:25] Elma
    Yeah, it was hard to pass through
    there during that season.
[06:28] Lucoa
    The gods actually came down for it, too.
[06:28] Kobayashi
    Local talk...
[06:30] Kobayashi
    I can't jump in at all.
[06:32] Kobayashi
    It's fun to hear stories
    about another world,
[06:35] Kobayashi
    but I feel kind of alienated.
[06:37] Kobayashi
    Well, I'll just swallow that down.
[06:42] Saikawa
    Amazing!
[06:45] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, your yukata's so cute!
[06:49] Kanna
    Your yukata's cute, too, Saikawa.
[06:56] Saikawa
    Kanna-san, let's come to the
    festival together next year, too.
[06:59] Kanna
    Mmm.
[07:00] Saikawa
    Let's come together when we're all grown up
     and even after we become grannies!
[07:07] Kanna
    Saikawa.
[07:08] Kanna
    Live a long life.
[07:09] Saikawa
    Huh? Yeah, I will?
[07:14] Saikawa
    You and I are BFFs! BFFs!
SIGN    Melon Ramune
[07:23] Ilulu
    This is a great place.
[07:25] Ilulu
    Kids are smiling!
[07:27] Take
    You always act like a kid,
[07:29] Take
    but every now and then you
    act way more mature than me.
[07:34] Take
    It won't fall down!
[07:37] Ilulu
    Take, I'm being tricked into being here.
[07:40] Take
    Tricked into it?
[07:42] Ilulu
    I was told I had to be an adult.
[07:45] Ilulu
    I thought I could never
    go back to being a kid,
[07:49] Ilulu
    but Kobayashi enticed me.
[07:51] Ilulu
    She said it was okay to be a kid again.
[07:55] Take
    Hmm...
[07:57] Take
    And yet the mature version
    of you is still there, too.
[08:00] Ilulu
    You think?
[08:01] Take
    Well, if that's how it is,
    then I'll trick you, too.
[08:04] Sign
    Baby Castella
[08:04] Take
    I'll let you be a kid!
[08:09] Take
    Yeah!
[08:10] Ilulu
    Then...
[08:11] Ilulu
    I guess I'll make you an adult, Take!
[08:14] Take
    Wh-What are you saying?!
[08:16] Ilulu
    Oh, did you just look at my breasts?
[08:18] Ilulu
    Wow, pervert!
[08:19] Take
    You precocious brat!
[08:21] Lucoa
    Those who knew the old you would
    be shocked to see you now.
[08:25] Elma
    You're one to talk, Lucoa.
[08:28] Elma
    To think a goddess would be content
    with being someone's familiar.
[08:32] Lucoa
    I'm doing that because I want to.
[08:34] Lucoa
    If you're not having fun,
    you're missing out.
[08:36] Elma
    Yeah, that's true.
[08:38] Kobayashi
    Shouta-kun, do you like Lucoa-san?
[08:41] Shouta
    Wh-What's this out of the blue?!
[08:42] Kobayashi
    Well...
[08:43] Kobayashi
    Say for example that Lucoa-san got friendly
    with your friends or classmates.
[08:50] Kobayashi
    What would you think when you saw that?
[08:57] Kobayashi
    Oh, sorry.
[08:58] Kobayashi
    You don't need to say anything.
[08:59] Kobayashi
    You don't need to say anything.
[09:01] Kobayashi
    That's right.
[09:02] Kobayashi
    Of course he'd feel uncomfortable.
[09:08] Elma
    Where are you going?
[09:10] Kobayashi
    It's been an hour.
[09:15] Tohru
    Huh? Miss Kobayashi?
[09:17] Tohru
    I was just about to go look for you.
SIGN    Fortune Drawing
SIGN    Skewers
[09:20] Kobayashi
    You look good in your yukata.
[09:22] Tohru
    Thank you so much!
[09:24] Tohru
    Is everyone over there?
[09:29] Kobayashi
    Hey...
[09:33] Kobayashi
    Let's walk around, just the two of us.
[09:42] Tohru
    Gladly!
[09:44] Tohru
    What's gotten into you, Miss Kobayashi?
SIGN    Special Fried Squid
[09:47] Tohru
    Oh, have you finally come
    to understand my charms?
[09:52] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[09:53] Tohru
    What?!
[09:54] Kobayashi
    You're one of the strongest dragons,
    capable of fighting even the gods.
[09:58] Kobayashi
    But here, you're able to make friends
    with anyone when you feel like it.
[10:03] Kobayashi
    Lately I've been thinking,
    after hearing about your past.
[10:07] Kobayashi
    Is it really okay for me to be loved
    by such an incredible person?
SIGN    Goldfish Scooping
[10:11] Tohru
    You've been thinking about that?
[10:14] Tohru
    I suppose I did share a few
    too many heavy stories.
[10:17] Kobayashi
    You're living with me like
    it's perfectly natural,
[10:21] Kobayashi
    but the things you've had to shoulder...
[10:24] Kobayashi
    And yeah, you're a dragon, too,
[10:27] Kobayashi
    so what is this whole situation?
[10:30] Kobayashi
    That's been spinning in my head.
[10:32] Tohru
    So...?
[10:35] Kobayashi
    It's fine, the way things are now,
[10:37] Kobayashi
    as much trouble as it can be.
[10:40] Tohru
    Huh...
SIGN    Horiuchi Butchery
[10:42] Kobayashi
    Well, that was my decision,
[10:46] Kobayashi
    but I want to know how you feel, Tohru.
[10:49] Tohru
    How I feel?
[10:53] Tohru
    I love you, Miss Kobayashi.
[10:55] Tohru
    Though I do feel that...
[10:58] Tohru
    I'm better than you, than all humans,
    really, in many respects.
[11:03] Tohru
    Of course I am.
[11:05] Tohru
    I'm a dragon and I also take pride in that.
[11:08] Tohru
    I've been in places where
    you have to risk death
[11:11] Tohru
    and put everything on the line
    to prove your superiority.
SIGN    Crepes
SIGN    Yakisoba
SIGN    Buttered Potatoes
SIGN    Chocolate Bananas
[11:14] Tohru
    But my heart...
[11:16] Tohru
    When it comes to the heart,
    there is no way to prove that.
[11:19] Tohru
    Is it better if you're
    more suited to fighting?
[11:21] Tohru
    If you're more beautiful?
[11:23] Tohru
    If you're smarter?
[11:25] Tohru
    I was always trying to be those things.
[11:28] Tohru
    I was always wishing I could be those things.
[11:30] Tohru
    I was trying to be an adult,
[11:33] Tohru
    but I didn't have to try to be anything.
[11:36] Tohru
    It was okay to just be myself.
[11:40] Tohru
    You're the one who made me
    realize that, Miss Kobayashi.
[11:44] Kobayashi
    There you go, giving me
    too much credit again.
[11:47] Tohru
    It makes me happy that you're
    so unaware of it yourself,
[11:51] Tohru
    because it means you're someone
    who saved me just that easily.
[11:56] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi.
[11:58] Tohru
    I love you.
[12:06] Tohru
    For now and forevermore.
[12:37] Kobayashi
    Tohru.
[12:38] Tohru
    Yes?!
[12:40] Kobayashi
    You're clingy.
[12:41] Tohru
    Huh?!
[12:50] Takiya
    Do you have any photos
    of the summer festival?
[12:52] Kobayashi
    I do. Want to see?
[13:02] Takiya
    Yeah, I can tell you had fun.
[13:05] Kobayashi
    Right?
SIGN    Life Is Constant Change (But It's Okay To Stop And Appreciate It)
SIGN    Final Episode
[13:14] Lucoa
    Hey, want to go flower viewing?
[13:22] Kobayashi
    It's the middle of summer.
    What are you talking about?
[13:25] Lucoa
    I know someone whose flesh
    turns into flowers.
[13:29] Lucoa
    They shared some with me, but it wouldn't
    be right to enjoy them all by myself.
[13:34] Kobayashi
    Flesh into flowers?
[13:36] Tohru
    Why not?
[13:37] Tohru
    I'll run the flower viewing
    so Miss Kobayashi can enjoy it!
[13:41] Kobayashi
    Why are you so into this?
[13:44] Tohru
    Come on, what's wrong with flower viewing?
[13:48] Tohru
    Oh, do you need more somen broth?
[13:56] Kobayashi
    Wow.
[13:58] Kobayashi
    This is all flesh, huh?
[14:00] Kobayashi
    It looks just like cherry blossoms.
[14:02] Lucoa
    Pretty, isn't it?
[14:04] Takiya
    Okay, I brought the drinks, too,
[14:07] Takiya
    so shall we get started?
[14:08] Kobayashi
    Yeah.
[14:11] Tohru
    Then by your leave, I'll begin
    the opening as the organizer.
[14:14] Tohru
    Thank you all for gathering here today
    for Miss Kobayashi's flower viewing.
[14:20] Tohru
    We have several recreations prepared
    for Miss Kobayashi to enjoy,
[14:24] Tohru
    so please lend your assistance with them.
[14:26] Kobayashi
    This is making me uncomfortable, so stop!
[14:35] Elma
    Sakura mochi's so good.
[14:44] Kobayashi
    This is nice.
[14:46] Kobayashi
    There's something much more satisfying
    about drinking while enjoying nature.
[14:51] Tohru
    Enjoying nature?
[14:54] Tohru
    You make it sound like humans
    are separate from nature.
[14:58] Kobayashi
    True.
[14:59] Kobayashi
    Maybe that's just what happens
[15:01] Kobayashi
    when we try to seek objective beauty
    and share it with each other.
[15:04] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[15:05] Kobayashi
    Huh?
[15:07] Kobayashi
    Now this is bad.
[15:08] Kobayashi
    Why did you even come?
[15:09] Takiya
    No, this is the real
    pleasure of these events.
[15:12] Fafnir
    Takiya, don't get distracted!
[15:14] Fafnir
    We have to work together to sever its tail!
[15:16] Fafnir
    We're relying on you!
[15:17] Kobayashi
    You have incredible faith
    in each other in that game.
[15:21] Kobayashi
    You're with them, too, Shouta-kun?
[15:23] Shouta
    I mean, it's only women over there,
    so I feel awkward.
[15:27] Kobayashi
    Guess that's a good point.
[15:28] Elma
    What's this, boy? You're bored?
[15:31] Kobayashi
    Elma.
[15:31] Elma
    All right, I'll strip down and help.
[15:40] Fafnir
    What are you doing?
[15:42] Elma
    I heard it was common to perform
    a thing or two at events like these.
[15:46] Elma
    After some research, I decided
    this was the best one.
[15:48] Takiya
    You went all out for it.
[15:50] Kobayashi
    That's for specific old
    men to do, not a woman...
[15:55] Kobayashi
    Or... I guess he really likes it!
[15:56] Kobayashi
    And Tohru...
[15:59] Tohru
    Pathetic!
[16:00] Kobayashi
    ...likes it for a different reason.
[16:03] Kanna
    Next time I'll do that for Saikawa!
[16:05] Ilulu
    I'll show it to Take, too.
[16:07] Kobayashi
    Please don't.
[16:09] Tohru
    Okay! Now everyone's getting excited!
[16:12] Tohru
    We're going to have a competition,
[16:13] Tohru
    so please draw lots to
    determine the brackets.
[16:16] Ilulu
    Competition?
[16:17] Tohru
    An arm wrestling competition!
[16:19] Ilulu
    Did you draw the image on that box?
[16:22] Kanna
    You're so good, Lady Tohru!
[16:24] Kobayashi
    I'm not participating in that, am I?
[16:26] Tohru
    You'll be our judge, Miss Kobayashi!
[16:28] Kobayashi
    I see.
[16:32] Tohru
    Come on. You, too, Mr. Fafnir.
[16:35] Fafnir
    Tch!
[16:36] Tohru
    Heave, ho!
[16:42] Kobayashi
    Okay, first round.
[16:44] Kobayashi
    Takiya-kun versus Ilulu.
[16:46] Kobayashi
    Takiya-kun, are you doing this?
[16:48] Takiya
    Huh? Yeah, might as well.
[16:50] Kobayashi
    Whatever.
[16:53] Kobayashi
    Ready? Ready, Go!
[17:05] Takiya
    I might have broken bones.
[17:07] Tohru
    Oh, that's all you walked away with?
[17:09] Ilulu
    Will he be okay?
[17:11] Kobayashi
    Takiya-kun's surprisingly reckless, huh?
[17:14] Kobayashi
    Okay, round two is Kanna-chan versus Lucoa-san.
[17:18] Kobayashi
    Ready,
[17:20] Kobayashi
    go!
[17:23] Kobayashi
    Lucoa-san wins.
[17:25] Kobayashi
    Kanna-chan, you can't use both hands.
[17:27] Kanna
    Oh!
[17:30] Fafnir
    You doing this?
[17:31] Shouta
    I'm not!
[17:33] Lucoa
    Shouta-kun, you can do it!
[17:34] Shouta
    
[17:59] Tohru
    If I can just defeat you...
[18:03] Elma
    Tohru was expected, but Lucoa, huh?
[18:06] Kobayashi
    I thought Faf-san would make it.
[18:09] Fafnir
    Don't call me that.
[18:10] Tohru
    Maybe you got rusty from
    holing up all the time?
[18:13] Fafnir
    Stuff it.
[18:14] Lucoa
    That reminds me.
[18:16] Lucoa
    I think this is the first time you and I
    have fought one-on-one, even in a game.
[18:21] Tohru
    That might be how you see it.
[18:24] Lucoa
    Shall we take this seriously, then?
[18:36] Tohru
    Sh-She's strong!
[18:39] Tohru
    I'm going to lose!
[18:42] Shouta
    Tohru-san, you can do it!
[18:44] Lucoa
    Huh?!
[18:44] Lucoa
    Not me?!
[18:46] Tohru
    Now!
[18:51] Kobayashi
    Winner, Tohru!
[18:53] Tohru
    Yay!
[18:55] Kanna
    Lady Tohru!
[18:57] Ilulu
    Impressive.
[18:58] Lucoa
    Shouta, why...?
[19:01] Tohru
    I bribed him.
[19:02] Shouta
    She did.
[19:03] Tohru
    Here, your magic crystal.
[19:05] Lucoa
    No way!
[19:07] Kobayashi
    Best maid Tohru won!
[19:10] Tohru
    Yay!
[19:34] Kobayashi
    Whoa.
[19:46] Tohru
    You really do enjoy
    drinking, Miss Kobayashi.
[19:50] Kobayashi
    You want a drink, too?
[19:52] Tohru
    Huh? Oh, yes, I'll have some.
[20:04] Kobayashi
    Good, right?
[20:05] Tohru
    It is good.
[20:07] Kobayashi
    This feels nice.
[20:10] Tohru
    Yes, it does.
[20:12] Tohru
    The sun is starting to set a little.
[20:15] Kobayashi
    Yeah, it is.
[20:16] ---
    Belly dance...
[20:19] Tohru
    You're back to work again tomorrow, right?
[20:22] Kobayashi
    Yeah,
[20:25] Kobayashi
    but...
[20:27] Kobayashi
    Well, forget about it.
[20:29] Kobayashi
    We don't have to worry about that now.
[20:36] Tohru
    Right.
[20:49] Tohru
    Okay, the party's in full swing!
     Liquor's flowing!
[20:53] Kobayashi
    I've got a bad feeling...
[20:55] Elma
    What's up?
[20:56] Tohru
    Cherry blossoms are fluttering
     and the perfect witnesses are all here!
[21:02] Tohru
    Time for today's main event!
[21:04] Tohru
    I'd like to hold the wedding ceremony
    for me and Miss Kobayashi!
[21:14] Elma
    What?!
[21:14] Kanna
    Oh!
SIGN    Congratulations!
[21:19] Kobayashi
    What is this?
[21:20] Tohru
    Now, Miss Kobayashi, here's
    your change of clothes.
[21:24] Kobayashi
    Whoa, what? What?
[21:34] Tohru
    Come on, Miss Kobayashi.
[21:41] Tohru
    Please say you love me.
[21:48] Kobayashi
    I...
[21:49] Tohru
    You?
[21:51] Kobayashi
    I...
[21:53] Tohru
    Yes!
[21:55] Kobayashi
    Idiot!
[22:02] Tohru
    Ah! Miss Kobayashi!
[22:04] Elma
    We can't let this tyranny stand!
[22:06] Elma
    Let's rescue Kobayashi!
[22:09] Kanna
    Lady Tohru, that's not fair!
[22:11] Ilulu
    I want to be bound to Kobayashi, too!
[22:23] Shouta
    According to this magic crystal,
    this wedding ceremony will...
[22:26] Lucoa
    Let's give them our blessings.
[22:30] Takiya
    Good grief, I can't turn a blind
    eye to my coworker's crisis.
[22:38] Fafnir
    Hmph. Good grief.
[22:46] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi!
[22:48] Tohru
    I'm a dragon,
[22:49] Tohru
    and I'm saying I'm willing to conduct a
    ritual according to your human values!
[22:54] Tohru
    Though, if you're saying there's no
    longer any need for such a thing,
[22:57] Tohru
    that also works!
[23:00] Elma
    What selfish nonsense are
    you spouting, you idiot?!
[23:25] Tohru
    I won't let you get away, Miss Kobayashi!
SIGN    End
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Libra
SIGN    A Libra Will Definitely Make It Happen
SIGN    Lucky Advice
SIGN    It's pointless to hide in a shelter,
    because I'll just wipe them all out.
SIGN    You'll force me!?
SIGN    This Week's "Who's Rotten?"
SIGN    Libra.

E13 - Japanese Hospitality (The Attendant Is a Dragon)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:23] Kanna
    Chloe!
[00:25] Chloe
    Kanna!
[00:29] Chloe
    I've missed you!
[00:31] Kanna
    Me, too.
[00:33] Chloe
    Who are these ladies?
[00:34] Kanna
    Kobayashi.
[00:36] Kanna
    Lady Tohru.
[00:37] Kanna
    Ilulu.
[00:38] Kobayashi
    Hello.
[00:39] Chloe
    Hello.
[00:41] Chloe
    So you're Kobayashi?
[00:44] Kobayashi
    Hmm?
[00:45] Ilulu
    Hey, hey, let's hurry up!
[00:48] Kanna
    Let's go.
[00:49] Chloe
    Kanna, hold on!
[00:52] Tohru
    Hey now, running is dangerous.
[00:55] Kanna
    Okay.
[02:29] Ilulu
    Where did you come from?
[02:31] Chloe
    Minnesota in America.
[02:33] Ilulu
    Minnesota? What's that? Is it tasty?
[02:36] Kanna
    So cliche.
[02:39] Kobayashi
    Hey, Tohru.
[02:40] Tohru
    What is it, Miss Kobayashi?
[02:42] Kobayashi
    How is Chloe speaking fluent Japanese?
[02:46] Tohru
    Oh, I cast a spell on her.
[02:49] Kobayashi
    I knew it.
[02:50] Kobayashi
    Well, whatever.
[02:51] Kobayashi
    So, where is this heading now?
[02:54] Tohru
    Akihabara.
[02:56] Kobayashi
    Akiba?
[02:57] Tohru
    Yes.
[02:58] Tohru
    I prepared a perfect hospitality plan,
     just as you requested!
[03:03] Kobayashi
    Oh?
[03:10] Ilulu
    Look!
[03:11] Ilulu
    We're racing over the ocean!
[03:13] Kanna
    Oh!
SIGN    Akihabara Radio Hall
[03:23] Takiya
    Yo. Hello.
[03:24] Fafnir
    Hmph.
[03:25] Tohru
    I called in experts on this district.
[03:27] Kobayashi
    Already passing it all off onto others?
[03:29] Takiya
    Man, I was happy to accept
    a request from Tohru-chan!
[03:34] Kobayashi
    Thank you, too, Faf-san.
[03:36] Fafnir
    Don't call me Faf-san.
[03:37] Chloe
    Who are those people?
[03:39] Kanna
    Kobayashi's friends.
[03:41] Chloe
    Wow. Does she have a lot of friends?
[03:44] Kanna
    Lots.
[03:46] Chloe
    Wow.
SIGN    Miss
SIGN    Center
[03:51] Chloe
    This is a VR game, right?
[03:53] Chloe
    I've wanted to try one of these!
[03:54] Fafnir
    What are you just standing there for?
[03:56] Fafnir
    Prepare for battle.
[03:57] Ilulu
    What is this?
[03:59] Ilulu
    Whoa! What's this?!
[04:02] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi! The whole scenery changed!
[04:17] Chloe
    It feels real!
[04:19] Chloe
    This is incredible!
[04:22] Ilulu
    This is fun!
[04:24] Kanna
    Pleasing.
[04:26] Fafnir
    Here they come!
[04:34] Fafnir
    Hmph.
[04:34] Fafnir
    Get him before he takes you down!
[04:39] Tohru
    No tricks needed!
[04:43] Fafnir
    A small one's coming your way!
[04:45] Tohru
    What is with this weak weapon?!
[04:48] Tohru
    It's irritating me!
[04:49] Kanna
    They got me!
[04:52] Chloe
    How dare you do that to Kanna!
[04:53] Ilulu
    We'll avenge you!
[04:55] Kobayashi
    It's quite surreal watching from outside.
[04:57] Takiya
    I'm glad they're all enjoying themselves.
SIGN    Ko
SIGN    Akihabara Gacchapon
[05:04] Kobayashi
    Incredible.
[05:06] Takiya
    I thought this might be
    more fun for the children.
[05:09] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, Miss Kobayashi!
[05:11] Tohru
    What is this?!
SIGN    Everyone Was a Dragon... 3
[05:14] Tohru
    All of them dressing like humans!
[05:16] Tohru
    Have they no pride as dragons?!
[05:20] Kobayashi
    You're one to talk.
[05:23] Kobayashi
    What's that?
[05:24] Ilulu
    Figured I'd give one to Take.
SIGN    Breast Cleavage
[05:27] Kobayashi
    That directly targets their libido.
SIGN    Small Breasts
[05:32] Kobayashi
    What?! You have a problem with that?!
SIGN    Ninja Tool
    Accessories
[05:38] Chloe
    Kanna! This looks fun!
[05:43] Chloe
    What's that?
SIGN    Deep-Fried Bugs
[05:45] Kanna
    It looks yummy.
[05:46] Chloe
    Huh?!
SIGN    ba
[05:49] Elma
    You're late. Jeez.
[05:51] Kobayashi
    Huh? It's Elma.
[05:53] Tohru
    Well, I didn't like asking for her help,
[05:56] Tohru
    but when it comes to food, Elma's the one.
[05:58] Tohru
    Not that I like it.
[06:00] Elma
    That's quite the statement
    after asking for a favor.
[06:03] Tohru
    Listen closely, Miss Chloe.
[06:04] Tohru
    This woman is a shame upon
    Japan... no, upon the world!
[06:08] Elma
    Who are you calling the
    world's biggest glutton?!
[06:11] Tohru
    No one even said that at all!
[06:14] Elma
    What?!
[06:15] Tohru
    You want to fight?!
[06:16] Chloe
    So this is a Japanese couple!
[06:20] Both
    No, we're not!
[06:21] Chloe
    I'm sorry!
[06:23] Tohru
    Come on, hurry up and show us the way!
[06:27] Elma
    I don't need you to tell me that!
[06:29] Tohru
    Don't go disappointing us!
[06:31] Elma
    I'll surprise you all!
[06:33] Chloe
    They're just not honest
     with each other.
[06:35] Kobayashi
    Isn't that the truth.
SIGN    ya
SIGN    Fruit Parlor Momomo
[06:37] Elma
    Here it is, here!
[06:39] Kobayashi
    Wow, and where are we?
[06:40] Elma
    It's the cotton candy shop
    everyone's talking about!
[06:42] Elma
    It's really popular!
[06:44] Tohru
    You just wanted to come here yourself.
[06:46] Elma
    Grk!
[06:47] Elma
    Well, I can't deny that,
[06:50] Elma
    but more importantly—
[06:54] Three
    Whoa.
[06:57] Three
    I want to eat that, too!
[06:59] Kobayashi
    All right, all right.
[07:05] Elma
    So fluffy!
[07:08] Three
    So fluffy!
[07:09] Chloe
    It's so delicious!
[07:11] Chloe
    How would you express this in Japanese?
SIGN    That's wicked.
SIGN    That's wicked.
[07:17] Chloe
    That's wicket?
SIGN    shi
[07:23] Ilulu
    That's wicked.
[07:24] Both
    That's wicked.
[07:24] Both
    That's wicket.
SIGN    's
[07:27] Chloe
    That's wicket.
[07:29] Both
    That's wicked.
SIGN    Dr
[07:30] Chloe
    Let's go there next!
[07:32] Chloe
    It's cute!
[07:33] Kanna
    It's cute.
[07:34] Elma
    Let's go, then!
[07:35] Kids
    Yeah!
[07:38] Tohru
    Even Elma's joined in with them.
[07:40] Tohru
    She's just like a child.
[07:41] Kobayashi
    What's wrong with her being excited?
[07:43] Kobayashi
    She seems to be having fun.
[07:46] Kobayashi
    What's that creepy laugh for?
[07:49] Tohru
    We're like a family on the weekend!
[07:53] Kobayashi
    You're heavy.
[07:56] Kobayashi
    Well, it's getting late.
    Shall we head home?
[07:59] Three
    Ehh?
[08:01] Kanna
    I want to play more.
[08:02] Tohru
    Come on, don't make trouble
    for Miss Kobayashi.
[08:06] Elma
    Wh-Why don't we come
    here again tomorrow?
[08:09] Elma
    There are still some shops I'd
    love to g— introduce you to!
[08:13] Tohru
    We've enjoyed plenty.
[08:15] Tohru
    Thank you very much.
[08:17] Tohru
    Please have fun by yourself tomorrow.
[08:20] Elma
    It tastes better when you
    enjoy it with everyone!
[08:22] Tohru
    Are you trying to turn
    Miss Chloe into a pig?!
[08:25] Elma
    What's that?!
[08:26] Tohru
    Don't give me that!
[08:27] Ilulu
    There they go again.
[08:29] Kobayashi
    Yes, yes, we're leaving now.
[08:32] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, please wait for me!
[08:35] Elma
    F-Fine then, I'll let you go this time!
[08:38] Chloe
    Wow. She sure knows how
     to handle them, huh?
[08:42] Kanna
    Kobayashi's top dog.
[08:44] Ilulu
    Hey, hey, Kobayashi,
[08:46] Ilulu
    what are we doing tomorrow?
[08:48] Kobayashi
    Hmm.
[08:50] Kobayashi
    Is there anywhere you'd
    like to go, Chloe-chan?
[08:55] Chloe
    Going out somewhere is nice,
[08:59] Chloe
    but I also want to know what
     Kanna's ordinary day is like!
[09:02] Kanna
    Hmm?
SIGN    Extra Episode
SIGN    Japanese Hospitality (The Attendant Is a Dragon)
[09:11] Saikawa
    Kanna-shwan!
[09:15] Saikawa
    Hmm?
[09:19] Chloe
    Huh?
[09:21] Saikawa
    Who is that woman?!
[09:24] Kanna
    Chloe. A friend.
[09:26] Chloe
    Well, that's true.
[09:28] Chloe
    You could even call us partners.
[09:32] Saikawa
    I-I'm Kanna-san's number one friend!
[09:36] Saikawa
    Her best friend! Her BFF!
[09:39] Saikawa
    What is your relationship with her?
[09:41] Chloe
    We met in New York.
[09:43] Saikawa
    New York?!
[09:44] Saikawa
    When did she get a local wife?
SIGN    Local wife?
[09:47] Chloe
    And who might you be?
[09:50] Kanna
    Saikawa. A friend.
[09:53] Chloe
    Oh, so you're Saikawa.
[09:56] Chloe
    I've heard about you.
[10:00] Chloe
    I'm Chloe.
[10:02] Chloe
    If you're okay with it, let's be friends!
[10:04] Saikawa
    Huh?
[10:06] Saikawa
    What is this feeling of closeness?
[10:09] Saikawa
    But...
[10:10] Saikawa
    But, but when I look closely,
    this girl is super cute!
[10:15] Saikawa
    She's a good girl, too!
[10:18] Saikawa
    W-Well, I guess we can play together.
[10:21] Chloe
    Really?! I'm so happy!
[10:26] Kanna
    Good friends!
[10:29] Kobayashi
    Simplegon.
[10:30] Tohru
    She's not a dragon, though.
SIGN    a
[10:34] Kanna
    Be careful, Chloe.
[10:35] Kanna
    If you fall, it's a penalty game.
[10:39] Saikawa
    You're good at this.
[10:40] Chloe
    I like running around!
[10:44] Saikawa
    It's too early to relax, though!
[10:50] Saikawa
    I'm up next.
[10:56] Saikawa
    Okay. You're up next, Chloe-san.
[11:11] Saikawa
    You're not bad!
[11:12] Chloe
    Of course!
[11:15] Chloe
    What's wrong?
[11:17] Kanna
    There's no more path.
[11:19] Chloe
    Does that mean it's over?
[11:24] Kanna
    Manholes are okay!
[11:26] Chloe
    Really?
[11:27] Saikawa
    There.
[11:29] Chloe
    Hah!
[11:33] Chloe
    I'm falling!
[11:34] Kanna
    Come closer.
[11:40] Saikawa
    I-I'm sorry!
[11:44] Kanna
    Chloe, penalty game.
[11:46] Chloe
    Eh?!
[11:51] Chloe
    What is this?!
[11:54] Chloe
    Why, you...!
SIGN    go
[12:00] Saikawa
    This is the school we attend.
SIGN    Pool Open
[12:03] Saikawa
    We go in through here,
[12:05] Saikawa
    and then we have class here.
[12:09] Kanna
    This is my seat.
[12:10] Chloe
    Wow, so this where you spend your days?
[12:16] Chloe
    Wow! There really is a pool at your school!
[12:20] Saikawa
    Come on, let's go.
[12:22] Chloe
    Yeah!
SIGN    Kobayashi
[12:28] Kanna
    Pool!
SIGN    Saikawa
[12:32] Kanna
    Saikawa.
[12:33] Kanna
    Where's Chloe?
[12:36] Saikawa
    I wonder if she's late because she had
    to borrow a swimsuit from the teacher.
[12:47] Hachisuka
    Wow! It's a blondie!
SIGN    Hachisuka
SIGN    Kuroda
[12:49] Kuroda
    Black ships landing!
SIGN    Kuramoto
[12:51] Kuramoto
    I can hear this going viral!
[12:54] Chloe
    Sorry for the wait.
[12:54] Hachisuka
    A blonde rich girl!
[12:56] Chloe
    Does it look weird?
[12:58] Saikawa
    Hey, boys! You're being annoying!
[13:00] Saikawa
    You give her any weird looks
    and I'll kill you, got it?!
[13:02] Hachisuka
    We weren't doing that.
[13:04] Saikawa
    Liar! You were just leering at her!
[13:06] Hachisuka
    Why, you...! We weren't!
[13:07] Kanna
    Chloe, let's swim.
[13:09] ---
    Huh? As if!
[13:11] Choe
    Actually, I can't swim very well.
[13:16] Kanna
    That's fine.
[13:18] Kanna
    We'll teach you.
[13:57] Chloe
    That was so fun!
[14:00] Chloe
    Huh? Where's Saikawa?
[14:02] Kanna
    Bathroom.
[14:03] Chloe
    I see.
[14:06] Chloe
    Kanna, I have a good idea.
[14:16] Chloe
    Well? Does it look good on us?
[14:19] Saikawa
    So jealoutrageous!
[14:20] Chloe
    Let's go like this today!
SIGN    n
[14:24] Saikawa
    This is my home.
[14:26] Saikawa
    Now, what should we play?
[14:30] Saikawa
    Oh, how about this?
[14:32] Chloe
    I'm great at this game!
[14:34] Chloe
    I don't lose, even to my Papa!
[14:37] Kanna
    I won't lose!
[14:39] Voice
    First player. Right hand, blue.
[14:41] Chloe
    Okay.
[14:42] Voice
    Second player. Left leg, black.
[14:46] Chloe
    Kanna, can you raise your
    hips a little more?
[14:50] Chloe
    Just a little more.
[14:52] Kanna
    Got it.
SIGN    Ma
SIGN    Oboro Shop
SIGN    Candy Games
[14:56] Kanna
    Good afternoon.
[14:57] Chloe
    Hi, Ilulu! We came to play.
[15:00] Ilulu
    Oh, I was waiting for you.
[15:02] Taketo
    Friends of yours?
[15:03] Ilulu
    She's been staying with us since yesterday.
[15:06] Chloe
    I'm Chloe. I'm from Minnesota.
[15:09] Chloe
    Nice to meet you.
[15:10] Kanna
    Chloe, over here.
[15:13] Taketo
    M-Minnesota? You mean America?
[15:16] Taketo
    Wait, isn't her Japanese really good?
[15:19] Ilulu
    That's true.
[15:20] Kanna
    This. And this, too.
[15:23] Chloe
    They're all things I've never seen before.
[15:26] Chloe
    What kind of candy is that?
SIGN    Super Sour Peach
[15:28] Saikawa
    Every one out of three is
    a dud that's verrrry sour!
[15:32] Chloe
    So it's Russian Roulette!
[15:34] Chloe
    Sounds fun!
SIGN    Fluffy, Crack!
SIGN    Cotton Bang!
[15:36] Chloe
    Then what's this?
[15:37] Kanna
    It's fluffy like a cloud and sweet.
[15:40] Kanna
    Or so you think, until it explodes.
[15:42] Chloe
    Explodes?!
[15:44] Chloe
    And what's that?
[15:45] Kanna
    That's a good one.
[15:46] Saikawa
    There's a good one over here, too!
[15:47] Ilulu
    Friends really are great, aren't they?
[15:49] Taketo
    What do you mean? You have friends, too.
[15:54] Ilulu
    All the more reason I was once again
    thinking about how nice they are.
[16:04] Chloe
    That man likes Ilulu, doesn't he?
[16:06] Taketo
    Dummy! I do not!
[16:09] Ilulu
    That's not it.
[16:11] Ilulu
    Take likes my boobs.
[16:14] Taketo
    I told you, that's not it!
SIGN    id
SIGN    Hand-Held
SIGN    Fireworks
[16:21] Kanna
    Kobayashi, done yet?
[16:23] Kobayashi
    Not yet. Go ahead and wait on the roof.
[16:27] Kanna
    Okay!
[16:29] Kanna
    Fireworks, fireworks!
[16:31] Tohru
    Ah, Kanna, could you take
    this food up with you, too?
[16:35] Kanna
    Roger!
[16:39] Kobayashi
    Could you raise your arms?
[16:41] Chloe
    Like this?
[16:44] Kobayashi
    There.
[16:47] Chloe
    Hey, Kobayashi?
[16:49] Kobayashi
    What?
[16:50] Chloe
    Kobayashi, do you know
    that Kanna's a dragon?
[16:55] Kobayashi
    Yeah, I know.
[16:59] Chloe
    Are you a dragon, too?
[17:02] Kobayashi
    No, no, just a normal human.
[17:05] Chloe
    Then... you're not family?
[17:07] Chloe
    Why are you living with Kanna?
[17:10] Kobayashi
    Hmm. It's just how things
    turned out, I guess?
[17:13] Chloe
    What's it like living with a dragon?
[17:16] Kobayashi
    Hmm, I guess it's like taking care
    of someone here on a home-stay?
[17:20] Chloe
    Home-stay?
[17:21] Kobayashi
    In that sense, it's similar
    to looking after you, Chloe.
[17:25] Chloe
    Huh?
[17:25] Chloe
    Then am I dragon, too?
[17:28] Kobayashi
    Maybe so.
[17:30] Kobayashi
    There, all done.
[17:33] Chloe
    It's lovely!
[17:35] Kobayashi
    Shall we go?
[17:36] Chloe
    Yeah!
[17:41] Kanna
    Give me a light, too.
[17:44] Chloe
    Of course!
[17:46] Kanna
    Oh!
[17:47] Saikawa
    Chloe-san, me, too! Me, too!
[17:50] Tohru
    Miss Kobayashi, everything's ready.
[17:53] Kobayashi
    Thanks.
[17:54] Kobayashi
    Everyone else should be here soon, I think.
[17:58] Elma
    Thanks for inviting us over!
[18:00] Kobayashi
    Welcome!
[18:01] Takiya
    Kobayashi-san, here. Beer.
[18:04] Kobayashi
    Oh!
[18:05] Ilulu
    Take, I want to do some fireworks, too!
[18:08] Tohru
    Miss Lucoa, good evening.
[18:10] Lucoa
    Mmm, thanks for inviting us.
[18:13] Tohru
    You, too, Shouta.
[18:14] Shouta
    Thanks for having me.
[18:15] Elma
    I came as well, you know.
[18:17] Tohru
    Ahh, yeah, yeah, go ahead and sit somewhere.
[18:20] Elma
    Hey! Why the different treatment?!
[18:23] Kobayashi
    Yes, yes.
[18:25] Kobayashi
    Okay, shall we get started, then?
[18:27] All
    Yeah!
SIGN    Beauty of Style Maid England Class
SIGN    Victorian Era Cute
SIGN    Middle Class
     Maid-Style Moe
SIGN    Ladies' Maids
SIGN    Work Classic
[19:04] Saikawa
    Kanna-san won, then.
[19:06] Kanna
    V! Ah.
[19:10] Saikawa
    I'll go get new fireworks!
[19:16] Chloe
    Hey, Kanna, are there
    other dragons here, too?
[19:20] Kanna
    Over there.
[19:24] Chloe
    Eh? Really?!
[19:25] Kanna
    Yeah.
[19:26] Kanna
    But Kobayashi is different.
[19:39] Kanna
    Chloe, did you have fun?
[19:42] Chloe
    Yes, it was the best two days ever!
[19:45] Chloe
    They're all great friends.
[19:47] Kanna
    Mhmm. I love them all.
[19:52] Chloe
    Kobayashi is incredible, isn't she?
[19:55] Chloe
    There are so many dragons around her.
[19:58] Kanna
    Yeah.
[19:59] Kanna
    Kobayashi's go go dragons.
[20:02] Chloe
    Go go?
[20:03] Kanna
    Yeah, go go dragons.
[20:09] Kanna
    Good night.
[20:13] Chloe
    Good night.
[20:28] Saikawa
    You have— You have to come
    back to play again, okay?
[20:35] Chloe
    Of course.
[20:37] Kanna
    Here.
[20:38] Chloe
    What's this?
[20:40] Kanna
    A pair.
[20:47] Chloe
    Kobayashi, I had fun.
[20:50] Chloe
    Thank you.
[20:51] Kobayashi
    Yeah. We had fun, too.
[20:54] Chloe
    Next time I run away
     from home, I'll come here.
[20:57] Kobayashi
    Well, that would be complicated.
[21:02] Chloe
    Well, I'm going now, okay?
[21:09] Chloe
    See you again!
[21:22] Kobayashi
    Chloe-chan is similar to you, Tohru.
[21:26] Tohru
    Huh? How so?
[21:29] Kobayashi
    The way she gets perplexed by
    the differences in culture,
[21:33] Kobayashi
    and the way she works hard to try
    and learn more about others, I think?
[21:39] Tohru
    Then that girl's a dragon, too.
[21:43] Kobayashi
    I told her the same thing.
[21:50] Chloe
    Hey, hey, when I spoke to Papa about Japan,
[21:54] Chloe
    he said he wanted to visit, too!
[21:56] Kanna
    Oh!
[21:58] Saikawa
    When are you coming next?
[21:59] Saikawa
    We'll welcome you anytime!
[22:01] Kanna
    I want to play more next time!
[22:03] Chloe
    Of course!
[22:04] Chloe
    Next time I'll come visit for a whole month!
[22:07] Kobayashi
    Those girls.