E5 - Mysterious Cat

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Neko
    I've been longing to see you.
[00:13] Masamune
    Who the hell is this?!
SIGN    #5 "Mysterious Cat"
[01:51] Masamune
    Wh-What's going—
[01:57] Neko
    O-Oh, dear... How improper of me.
[02:01] Neko
    I'm terribly sorry.
[02:03] Masamune
    Er, no, it's okay...
[02:05] Neko
    This must have happened because
    it was all I prayed for, day and night.
[02:08] Neko
    The Lord has finally allowed us to meet.
[02:17] Masamune
    S-So soft...
[02:20] Masamune
    Er, I mean... Wait! Hold on a
    second! Come to your senses!
[02:25] Masamune
    Who is this?
[02:28] Masamune
    I don't know her. I have no idea who she is.
[02:31] Masamune
    Have we met somewhere?
    Nah, no way. Nope, nope, nope!
[02:34] Neko
    Do you have even the slightest of
    feelings for me, Masamune-sama?
[02:39] Masamune
    She got my name right.
[02:41] Masamune
    D-Do hot guys
[02:43] Masamune
    have random girls just hurl themselves
    at them before they even know it?
[02:49] Masamune
    Nah, that can't be.
[02:50] Masamune
    L-Listen...
[02:52] Masamune
    I'm pretty sure you've got the wrong person.
[02:55] Neko
    Huh?
[02:56] Shidou
    Milady, it's just about time.
[02:59] Neko
    But, Shidou...
[03:01] Shidou
    It's time.
[03:04] Neko
    I am so delighted that I had a chance
    to see you, Masamune-sama.
[03:09] Neko
    I do hope we will see each other again soon.
[03:11] Masamune
    Huh?
[03:12] Neko
    If you will excuse me.
[03:15] Masamune
    Hey, wait...
[03:21] Masamune
    What the hell was that?
[03:26] Masamune
    Hey, Adagaki-san.
[03:28] Aki
    Who was that?
[03:30] Masamune
    Er, I'm not really sure, either.
[03:34] Aki
    Why don't you die?
[03:45] Shidou
    Milady.
[03:46] Shidou
    Please do not forget that
    you are a Fujinomiya.
[03:49] Shidou
    You made a promise to your father.
[03:52] Neko
    I haven't forgotten.
[03:56] Neko
    I believe this will be a most splendid game.
[04:05] Masamune
    Ladies and gentlemen!
SIGN    Ma-kun's The Truth Show
[04:09] (Flashback) Masamune
    There is something that I
    really want to say right now!
[04:12] (Flashback) Masamune
    May the hammer come down
    on girls who refuse to listen.
[04:16] (Flashback) Masamune
    That woman dares to tell me to die
    without even hearing me out—yes!
[04:19] (Flashback) Masamune
    I'm talking about Adagaki Aki!
[04:21] (Flashback) Masamune
    I am not guilty! I am innocent!
[04:24] (Flashback) Masamune
    Listen to me, damn it!
[04:34] Guy
    Ma'am, I need an egg salad sandwich!
[04:36] Guy2
    Chicken cutlets! Chicken cutlets!
[04:38] Masamune
    Ma'am...
[04:39] Masamune
    I need five yakisoba buns,
    four cutlet sandwiches,
[04:42] Masamune
    and five croquette buns!
[04:48] Masamune
    All right, this should be more than enough.
[04:51] Masamune
    She's probably enjoying
[04:53] Masamune
    her loner feast in that gym
    storage room right now.
[04:56] Masamune
    After all, she is a gluttonous fiend.
[04:58] Masamune
    No matter how bad her mood might be,
    I've brought this many offerings.
[05:02] Masamune
    Surely she'll at least hear me out.
[05:04] Masamune
    I-It's okay. It'll work out.
[05:17] Masamune
    You can't shoot gas guns at people!
[05:22] Yoshino
    Would you have preferred the real thing?
[05:25] Masamune
    What the hell was that for?
[05:28] Yoshino
    I'm on duty. Aki-sama's orders.
SIGN    High Voltage
[05:33] Yoshino
    She told me to chase the Pig's
    Foot away if he came near.
[05:35] Masamune
    She's still mad?
[05:37] Yoshino
    Pig's Foot, this didn't seem like
    something that she'd let go easily.
[05:43] Yoshino
    What did you do?
[05:45] Masamune
    Well...
[05:46] Yoshino
    "Well"?
[05:47] Masamune
    I mean...
[05:49] Yoshino
    "I mean"?
[05:53] Masamune
    After I talked with you yesterday,
[05:56] Masamune
    I went to see Adagaki Aki.
[06:00] Yoshino
    She suddenly jumped into your arms?
[06:03] Masamune
    I swear! I seriously
    have no idea who she is!
[06:05] Masamune
    I don't even know what her name is!
[06:07] Masamune
    You believe me, right, Master?
[06:10] Masamune
    M-Master!
[06:12] Yoshino
    To think that you were this hopeless...
[06:15] Masamune
    Seriously, I'm not!
[06:16] Yoshino
    I told you not to interfere.
[06:17] Masamune
    You think I'm that resourceful?!
SIGN    Unresourceful
[06:22] Yoshino
    That's not the point here. Don't you get it?
[06:34] Masamune
    Is she just going to abandon me?
[06:39] Masamune
    Fine.
[06:41] Masamune
    I decided I'd do this myself anyway.
[06:44] Masamune
    I just have to review what
    I'm supposed to say.
[06:50] (Flashback) Masamune
    You sure went through a lot
    yesterday, Adagaki-san.
[06:53] (Flashback) Masamune
    I went through a lot, too.
[06:56] (Flashback) Masamune
    But you're my number one girl, Adagaki-san.
[07:08] Masamune
    No, no!
[07:46] girlA
    The wind's so strong.
[07:48] girlB
    It is.
[07:50] Masamune
    Man... I didn't get any sleep at all.
[07:53] Masamune
    I seriously have no idea who that girl is.
[07:56] Masamune
    That girl...
[08:01] (Flashback) Neko
    Masamune-sama.
[08:04] Masamune
    But she sure was cute...
[08:08] Masamune
    Actually, she's pretty much my type.
[08:12] Masamune
    But I seriously have no idea who she is!
[08:15] Masamune
    That stupid Cruel Princess pisses me off!
[08:17] Masamune
    Koiwai Yoshino, too!
[08:18] Tae
    What's wrong with Masamune-kun?
[08:20] Kojuurou
    No idea. He's been acting pretty suspicious.
[08:24] Teacher
    We're starting homeroom. Take your seats.
[08:24] Masamune
    Why am I surrounded by people
    who won't listen to me?
[08:32] Teacher
    I'm going to introduce you
    to a new transfer student.
[08:42] Neko
    I am Fujinomiya Neko.
[08:44] Neko
    I am pleased to make your acquaintance.
[08:47] guyB
    Sh-She's beautiful!
[08:49] girlC
    So cute!
[08:56] Teacher
    Fujinomiya-san, go ahead and
    take that empty desk over there.
[08:59] Neko
    Yes, sir.
[09:08] Masamune
    All right! I've been waiting
    for this five-minute break!
[09:11] Tae
    Fujinomiya-san, do you have a moment?
[09:13] girlD
    Your hair is so pretty!
    What shampoo do you use?
[09:16] girlE
    Where did you transfer from?
[09:18] Masamune
    Wh-What is this?
[09:20] Neko
    Seichou Academy.
[09:22] girlC
    Seichou?
[09:23] girlD
    Oh, I've heard of it. It's an
    all-girls boarding school.
[09:27] GirlD
    I saw it on TV.
[09:28] GirlA
    It's in the middle of some mountains.
    The school looks like a castle.
[09:32] Girls
    Wow!
[09:33] Masamune
    Who cares about all that?!
[09:35] Masamune
    Just...
[09:36] Masamune
    let me...
[09:37] Masamune
    talk to her!
[09:40] Masamune
    The next class...
[09:44] Tae
    That looks good on you!
[09:47] Girl
    I'll show you where it is. This way.
[09:56] Masamune
    Curse you girls!
[09:58] guyA
    So that's what it means to feel more
    comfortable around the same sex.
[10:01] guyB
    It's a violation of the anti-trust act.
    The wealth needs to be redistributed.
[10:05] guyB
    Hey, Kojuurou. Go mix in with them.
[10:07] Kojuurou
    What? No! It's too scary!
[10:09] guyB
    It's not scary. They won't
    even notice you're there.
[10:13] guyA
    Put this bow on. Here.
[10:17] guyA
    I need a picture! A picture!
[10:18] guys
    Hurry! Hurry! Wait, hang on!
[10:19] Masamune
    I'll go.
[10:20] Kojuurou
    You will, Makabe-kun?
[10:22] Masamune
    I just need to talk to her, right?
[10:24] guyB
    Th-That's right, Makabe!
[10:25] guyB
    That's using your hot-guy-ness!
[10:27] ---
    Makabe-kun, you'd do that for us?
[10:29] Masamune
    These guys are a real pain.
[10:31] Guyb
    I'll treat you to Mac!
[10:32] GuyA
    And karaoke!
[10:34] Masamune
    I have a ton of things that I want
    to ask Fujinomiya Neko myself.
[10:38] Masamune
    Hey, girls. Do you mind if we join in—
[10:41] Girls
    No way!
[10:45] Masamune
    I'm sorry! I'm sorry for interrupting
    your squees and giggles!
[10:49] Tae
    Masamune-kun, perfect timing!
[10:53] Masamune
    Wh-What? What is this?
[10:56] Tae
    Masamune-kun, did you know?
[10:58] Masamune
    Huh?
[10:58] Tae
    Fujinomiya-san says she
    transferred here just for you.
[11:03] Masamune
    Huh?
[11:06] Masamune
    Huh?!
[11:10] Neko
    U-Um...
[11:11] Neko
    Masamune-sama had no way of knowing.
[11:15] Neko
    I personally feel indebted to him, that is all.
[11:18] Girls
    Then you should tell him,
    right here and now!
[11:25] Neko
    Three years ago on Christmas...
SIGN    Donations
[11:30] (Flashback) Neko
    We would deeply appreciate
[11:33] (Flashback) Neko
    your warm donations again this Christmas.
[11:57] (Flashback) Neko
    Um...
[12:01] (Flashback) Guy
    You should dress warmer.
[12:05] (Flashback) Guy
    It looked like you were about
    to grow wings and fly away.
[12:14] Neko
    When you said that to me, Masamune-sama,
[12:16] Neko
    you looked like an angel in my eyes.
[12:19] Masamune
    Wai—
[12:20] girlC
    Wait, what's going to happen
    to Adagaki-san, then?
[12:23] girlA
    Well, this is this, and that's that.
[12:26] Masamune
    Seriously, wait.
[12:27] Tae
    This is like something out of a shojo manga!
[12:30] Masamune
    Who the hell is that nauseatingly
    smug guy supposed to be?!
[12:33] Masamune
    Three years ago, I was still
    a fatty living in Shinshuu!
[12:36] guyB
    That's Makabe for you.
[12:38] guyA
    Can't be helped if it was Makabe.
[12:40] Masamune
    They're convinced!
[12:49] Masamune
    Let's talk for a sec.
[12:59] Neko
    Um, Masamune-sama...
[13:01] Neko
    If you run so quickly, I'll...
[13:07] Masamune
    S-Sorry, I didn't notice.
[13:12] Masamune
    Blood?!
[13:13] Masamune
    Fujinomiya-san?!
[13:15] Masamune
    E-Emergency! Emergency!
[13:16] Masamune
    Where's the medic?!
[13:18] Masamune
    Wait, should I call 110?
[13:19] Masamune
    No, it's 119!
[13:21] Masamune
    But first, the nurse's office...
[13:24] Neko
    I'm all right.
[13:26] Neko
    I just got dizzy for a moment.
[13:29] Masamune
    Are you sure you're okay?
[13:31] Neko
    Yes.
[13:36] Masamune
    You dropped some... thing...
SIGN    Kamego Tomato Ketchup
    Mini Pack
[13:43] Masamune
    That's the blood?
[13:44] Neko
    Please do not worry.
[13:46] Neko
    I picked a brand that uses the
    best natural ingredients.
[13:49] Masamune
    Er, what's this doing here?
[13:51] Neko
    It's a part of a refined lady's tastes.
[13:54] Masamune
    Tastes?
[13:56] Neko
    Think of it as a variation on
    a mayonnaise enthusiast.
[14:00] Masamune
    If not for the situation, I almost
    wouldn't want to believe you...
[14:04] Neko
    What do you put on your eggs?
[14:06] Masamune
    Sorry, but I prefer salt and pepper.
[14:08] Masamune
    Stop trying to change the subject!
[14:11] Masamune
    More importantly, why would
    you tell a lie like that?
[14:14] Masamune
    I don't know you.
[14:19] Neko
    The truth is rather embarrassing.
[14:22] Masamune
    Huh?
[14:23] Neko
    If possible,
[14:25] Neko
    I would prefer to keep the truth
    a secret between you and me.
[14:29] Masamune
    Uh, that doesn't explain anything to me...
[14:31] Neko
    It doesn't matter to me
    that you don't remember.
[14:35] Neko
    It doesn't change the fact
    that I've always admired you.
[14:38] Neko
    Is it a bother to you?
[14:41] Masamune
    Damn it. She's really cute.
[14:44] Masamune
    Don't lose your head, Makabe Masamune.
    You know this is wrong.
[14:47] Masamune
    You have to endure.
    If you lose your resolve here,
[14:50] Masamune
    what'll come of your revenge
    against that scumball?
[14:54] Masamune
    I appreciate your feelings, but I'm sorry.
[14:57] Masamune
    I have someone that I like.
[14:59] Masamune
    Damn it, I said it. What a waste.
[15:03] Neko
    No... That can't be...
[15:07] Masamune
    I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
[15:09] Neko
    Is she that wonderful?
[15:11] Masamune
    Actually, she's crude, she's a
    glutton, she's unrefined...
[15:14] Masamune
    She's the opposite of wonderful.
[15:16] Masamune
    Yeah...
[15:17] Neko
    A-Are you two dating?
[15:19] Masamune
    No. It's one-sided.
[15:21] Neko
    I-If it's not a bother,
[15:22] Neko
    would you mind telling me who she is?
[15:27] Aki
    No, that isn't enough.
[15:30] Aki
    I need five K sandwiches,
    and five Y sandwiches.
[15:32] Aki
    I need another of that
    exact same order at 3 PM.
[15:35] Yoshino
    Understood.
[15:36] Masamune
    That's her, by the window.
[15:38] Neko
    The girl with the short hair?
[15:40] Masamune
    No, the long-haired girl next
    to her, with the big attitude...
[15:44] Masamune
    Oh, I mean in the sense that she's level-headed.
[15:47] Masamune
    I mean, just going by looks,
[15:49] Masamune
    the Cruel Princess is unbeatable.
[15:52] Masamune
    I'm sure Fujinomiya-san will give up.
[15:54] Neko
    Ah, she ain't gonna be a problem.
[15:57] Masamune
    Huh?
[16:00] Masamune
    Hey, wait a sec!
[16:06] Neko
    I apologize for what happened the other day.
[16:09] Aki
    You're the girl from...
[16:12] Neko
    My name is Fujinomiya Neko.
[16:15] Neko
    I truly envy you,
[16:17] Neko
    since you have Masamune-sama's affection.
[16:21] Masamune
    I've gotta stop her!
[16:32] Both
    She's not wearing any?
[16:45] Neko
    I'm very mindful when it comes to my health.
[16:48] Masamune
    Huh?
[16:49] Neko
    Feeling moderately tense is
    the secret to good health.
[16:53] Masamune
    Who needs that kind of health tip?!
[16:55] Neko
    The trick is in your stride and
    how you place your feet.
[16:58] Masamune
    The trick to what exactly?
[17:00] Neko
    I am very blessed.
[17:02] Neko
    Regardless of how you might feel about me,
[17:05] Neko
    it feels like a miracle that
    we're able to speak at all.
[17:09] Masamune
    Wait, wait, wait...
[17:10] Aki
    So annoying.
[17:12] Masamune
    Crap! I got caught up in the fact
    that she's not wearing any!
[17:16] Aki
    Leave right now. If you
    won't leave, then I will.
[17:24] Masamune
    Wait!
[17:25] Masamune
    I want to talk to you about this.
[17:35] Masamune
    It's not like that!
[17:37] Masamune
    She's mistaken me for someone else!
    That has nothing to do with me!
[17:41] Masamune
    Are you going to believe her over me?
[17:44] Aki
    Huh?
[17:45] Aki
    Where do you get off
    expecting me to believe you?
[17:48] Masamune
    I'm telling you to hear me out!
[17:50] Aki
    Get away from me! I'll catch
    your chronic superficiality!
[17:59] Gym Teacher
    You guys have some nerve,
[18:01] Gym Teacher
    boldly skipping class like this.
[18:12] Aki
    That unreasonable teacher...
[18:13] Aki
    I'm going to dub him
    "Mr. Broke-ass from 3-B."
[18:17] Masamune
    You think you have a right to be mad?
[18:19] Masamune
    I'm the one who got dragged
    into this nonsense.
[18:22] (Flashback) Gym teacher
    As punishment, you'll be cleaning
    the pool after school!
[18:25] Masamune
    Endure. I have to endure this.
[18:27] Masamune
    Well, let's just hurry up and
    finish cleaning this pool.
[18:31] Aki
    Yes, you're right.
[18:33] Aki
    Before I get indiscriminately
    assaulted by a certain someone.
[18:36] Aki
    I'll start cleaning over there,
[18:38] Aki
    so don't you dare come anywhere near me.
[18:41] Masamune
    What is her problem?! What is her
    problem?! What is her problem?!
[18:44] Masamune
    Ugh, what the hell am
    I going to do with you?!
[18:48] Masamune
    You piss me off... You piss
    me off... You piss me off!
[18:55] Aki
    M-Makabe!
[18:58] Masamune
    Sorry, Adagaki-san. That was an accident.
[19:01] Aki
    An accident, eh?
[19:10] Masamune
    The Cruel Princess is sadly
    lacking in some areas.
[19:14] Masamune
    Though she's got some nice legs.
[19:17] Aki
    What are you looking at?
    Shouldn't you be cleaning?
[19:19] Masamune
    Yeah, yeah.
[19:21] Aki
    Hup...
[19:22] Aki
    What the heck? It's so heavy.
[19:26] Masamune
    Wha—
[19:34] Aki
    Makabe, come over here.
[19:38] Aki
    This will spill if I walk any further.
[19:40] Masamune
    What the hell are you doing?
[19:41] Aki
    I'm going to accidentally 
    spill this on you, of course.
[19:44] Masamune
    That's totally intentional!
[19:45] Masamune
    Anything "accidental" is way
    out of the picture now!
[19:48] Aki
    They say, "An eye for an eye,
    and a tooth for a tooth," right?
[19:50] Masamune
    Aren't you thinking of
    repaying a debt twofold?
[19:53] Aki
    It's accidental!
[19:54] Masamune
    No accident is that vindictive!
[19:57] Aki
    There's no way I'll be the only one to get wet.
[20:00] Masamune
    Come on, give me a break.
    I'm not wearing a swimsuit.
[20:03] Aki
    So?
[20:04] Masamune
    You want me to go home
    in drenched underwear?
[20:06] Aki
    Maybe you shouldn't wear any, then.
    You two can go commando together.
[20:12] Masamune
    She's hopeless. I need to do something, fast.
[20:15] Aki
    Come, now. Be grateful for this water
    that I'm going to accidentally...
[20:25] Masamune
    Serves you right.
[20:30] Masamune
    Is she drowning? Could it
    be that she can't swim?
[20:32] Masamune
    Wait, I thought she was good at sports!
[20:37] Masamune
    I'll be right there!
[20:41] Masamune
    Just a bit more...
[20:49] Masamune
    I guess her feet touched the bottom.
[20:55] Aki
    I thought you didn't want to get wet.
[20:58] Masamune
    I can't help it. My body moved on its own.
[21:00] Masamune
    I can't have you dying on me,
    for various reasons.
[21:05] Aki
    Huh... I see.
[21:07] Aki
    So it just moved on its own.
    I figured it was no more than that.
[21:13] Masamune
    Then what do you want me to say?!
[21:15] Masamune
    If I said it's because I like you,
    you wouldn't believe me anyway!
[21:18] Aki
    Wha— I never said anything like that!
[21:21] Masamune
    You might as well have!
[21:27] Masamune
    It's true that I wanted to save you.
[21:29] Masamune
    Sorry for overstepping my bounds.
[21:33] Masamune
    There's no getting through to someone
[21:36] Masamune
    who's closed off to begin with.
[21:38] Masamune
    That's what sucks about it being one-way.
[21:41] Masamune
    I don't get it. Why am I so annoyed by this?
[21:45] Masamune
    I just...
[21:47] Aki
    Then prove it to me.
[21:51] Aki
    Prove it?
[21:52] Aki
    Yes. Prove that you like me.
[21:58] Aki
    You can't?
[21:59] Masamune
    What would it take for you to believe me?
[22:02] Aki
    Well, for example...
[22:08] Aki
    You could kiss me.