# KONOSUBA - God's blessing on this wonderful world!
After a traffic accident, Kazuma Sato's disappointingly brief life was supposed to be over, but he wakes up to see a beautiful girl before him. She claims to be a goddess, Aqua, and asks if he would like to go to another world and bring only one thing with him. Kazuma decides to bring the goddess herself, and they are transported to a fantasy world filled with adventure, ruled by a demon king. Now Kazuma only wants to live in peace, but Aqua wants to solve many of this world's problems, and the demon king will only turn a blind eye for so long...
# Season 1
# E1 - This Self Proclaimed Goddess and Reincarnation in Another World!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR9PM8116/this-self-proclaimed-goddess-and-reincarnation-in-another-world)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] Kaz**
There we go...
**[00:07] Kaz**
*I normally shut myself in at home,*
**[00:10] Kaz**
* but unusually for me,*
* today I made up my mind to go out.*
**[00:17] Kaz**
* All to get my hands on*
* the first-run limited edition*
**[00:19] Kaz**
* of a popular online game*
* that goes on sale today.*
**[00:31] Kaz**
A five-hour round trip!
I'm glad I was able to buy it.
**[00:34] Kaz**
In-store exclusives, official or not,
really are playing dirty.
**[00:40] Kaz**
* This sunlight is my worst enemy*
* after three straight all-nighters.*
**[00:44] Kaz**
*Time to get home and play the hell out of this.*
**[00:52] Kaz**
*A girl from my high school?*
**[00:58] Kaz**
Look out! That truck's going to—
**[01:05] Kaz**
*Why would I choose now, of all times,*
**[01:08] Kaz**
*to do something so out of character?*
**[01:24] Aqua**
Satou Kazuma-san.
**[01:27] Aqua**
Welcome to the afterlife.
**[01:31] Aqua**
Unfortunately, you passed away moments ago.
**[01:39] Aqua**
Your life was a short one,
**[01:43] Aqua**
but you are, in fact, dead.
**[01:49] Kaz**
Just one question...
**[01:52] Kaz**
What about the girl I
pushed out of harm's way?
**[01:56] Aqua**
She's alive.
**[01:59] Kaz**
Thank goodness.
**[02:01] Kaz**
*That means my death wasn't in vain.*
**[02:06] Aqua**
Actually, she wouldn't have gotten hurt,
**[02:09] Aqua**
even if you hadn't pushed her out of the way.
**[02:11] Kaz**
Huh?
**[02:12] Aqua**
That tractor was going to stop before it hit her.
**[02:16] Kaz**
Huh? Wait a second.
**[02:18] Aqua**
What is it?
**[02:19] Kaz**
"Tractor"?
**[02:21] Aqua**
Yes, it was a tractor.
**[02:24] Kaz**
Huh? Then what happened?
**[02:26] Kaz**
Did I die by getting plowed over by a tractor?
**[02:28] Aqua**
No, you died of shock.
**[02:30] Aqua**
You mistakenly thought a truck ran over you.
**[02:33] Kaz**
I died of shock?!
**[02:38] Aqua**
I've been doing this for a long time,
**[02:40] Aqua**
but you're the first human to
ever die in such a bizarre way.
**[02:45] Kaz**
* I've never even met this girl*
* before. What's her deal?*
**[02:48] Aqua**
You were so terrified that you'd
be run over, you wet yourself.
**[02:51] Aqua**
You passed out and were
taken to a nearby hospital,
**[02:54] Aqua**
and the doctors and nurses laughed
at you as you had a heart attack—
**[02:56] Kaz**
Stop! I don't wanna hear it!
**[02:58] Kaz**
I don't wanna hear it! I don't wanna hear it!
**[03:00] Aqua**
Your family just rushed to the hospital,
**[03:02] Aqua**
and now even they're laughing
out loud at the cause of death.
**[03:05] Kaz**
Stop! Stop!
**[03:06] Aqua**
Well...
**[03:09] Aqua**
I've vented enough stress for now.
**[03:12] Kaz**
*Damn her!*
**[03:13] Aqua**
My name is Aqua.
**[03:16] Aqua**
I'm a goddess who guides humans
who die young to the afterlife.
**[03:20] Aqua**
You have two choices.
**[03:23] Aqua**
You can start from square one with a new life,
**[03:25] Aqua**
or you can go to Heaven and
carry on like an old man.
**[03:29] Aqua**
To tell you the truth,
**[03:32] Aqua**
Heaven isn't the dreamy place
you all imagine it to be.
**[03:35] Kaz**
Huh?
**[03:36] Aqua**
Not only is there no TV, there are
no manga or games, either.
**[03:38] Aqua**
You don't even have a physical body,
**[03:40] Aqua**
so you can't do anything sexual, either.
**[03:44] Aqua**
There's nothing to do there but
bask in the sun for all eternity.
**[03:47] Kaz**
What?
**[03:49] Aqua**
Yeah, you don't want to go to a
boring place like Heaven, do you?
**[03:53] Kaz**
Uh, right...
**[03:55] Aqua**
On the other hand, starting over
from square one isn't so fun, either.
**[03:59] Aqua**
On that note, I've got a great offer for you.
**[04:01] Aqua**
You like games, don't you?
**[04:03] Kaz**
Huh?
**[04:05] Aqua**
That world, which has long enjoyed peace,
**[04:08] Aqua**
is being threatened by the Devil King's army!
**[04:11] Aqua**
The livelihoods its citizens have worked
for are being trampled by monsters.
**[04:15] Aqua**
Everyone lives in fear of the Devil King's
army's merciless pillage and slaughter!
**[04:20] Aqua**
...slaughter!
**[04:24] Aqua**
Since that's the sort of world it is,
everyone refuses to be reborn,
**[04:28] Aqua**
so the population is declining.
**[04:30] ---**
I see...
**[04:31] Aqua**
So we decided, "Why not send people who've
**[04:33] Aqua**
died in other worlds there with their
bodies and memories intact?"
**[04:38] Kaz**
What's the point in sending me there
if I'm just going to be killed?
**[04:41] Aqua**
That's why I'm doing you a big favor.
**[04:43] Aqua**
I'm granting you the right to bring any
one thing of your choosing with you.
**[04:47] Aqua**
It could be a powerful weapon,
or a tremendous talent.
**[04:51] Aqua**
You'll be able to redo your life
with all of your original memories.
**[04:54] Aqua**
To top it off, you can bring
one thing of your choosing!
**[04:58] Aqua**
And the people of the parallel world
**[04:59] Aqua**
will earn someone battle-ready to help them.
**[05:02] Aqua**
Not a bad deal, don't you think?
**[05:07] Kaz**
Um, I want to ask something.
**[05:10] Kaz**
Will I be able to speak this
other world's language?
**[05:13] Aqua**
That won't be an issue.
***SIGN*** Parallel World Reincarnation Guide and Contract
The First Ever Parallel World Guide! (For Shut-ins)
**[05:16] Aqua**
With the kind support of us gods,
**[05:19] Aqua**
we'll overload your brain so you'll
be able to learn it instantly.
***SIGN*** Caution!
Because the process of installing the ability to speak the parallel world's language into the one
who wishes to be reincarnated there (henceforth referred to as "Reincarnated") requires
instantaneous overloading of the hippocampus and cerebral cortex (henceforth referred to as
"Brain"), Reincarnated's Brain may, in rare cases, lose certain faculties (go "p°°f"). Should
this occur, according to Article 1296 Clauses 2 and 5 and Article 2051 Clause 3,
Reincarnated may not hold those responsible for his reincarnation accountable.
**[05:23] Aqua**
As a side effect,
**[05:24] Aqua**
you might just go "poof"
if you're unlucky, though.
**[05:26] Aqua**
So all that leaves you to do is to choose
a powerful ability or piece of equipment.
**[05:33] Kaz**
I just heard you mention
something really serious.
**[05:36] Kaz**
What do you mean, "poof"?
**[05:37] Aqua**
I never said that.
**[05:38] Kaz**
Yes, you did.
**[05:40] Aqua**
Now, choose!
**[05:43] Aqua**
I'll grant you one power
that is second to none!
**[05:51] Kaz**
*This is my gamer's intuition talking,*
**[05:52] Kaz**
* but all of the abilities and equipment*
* here are totally broken!*
**[05:55] Kaz**
* If I'm going to a world where magic exists,*
* I absolutely have to try it out!*
**[06:00] Aqua**
Hey, hurry it up.
**[06:02] Aqua**
No matter what you pick, it's all the same.
**[06:04] Aqua**
Nobody's expecting much from
a shut-in game otaku anyway.
**[06:07] Kaz**
I-I'm not an otaku!
**[06:09] Kaz**
And I died after leaving my house,
so I'm not a shut-in, either!
**[06:14] Aqua**
None of that matters. Just hurry it up.
**[06:17] Aqua**
I've still got lots more deceased
humans to guide, you know.
**[06:20] Kaz**
*Damn her!*
**[06:22] Kaz**
* Getting all cocky just because*
* she's a little bit cute...*
**[06:31] Kaz**
"Hurry up and decide," huh?
**[06:33] Kaz**
I'll do just that, then.
**[06:35] Kaz**
Pick one thing to bring to
this parallel world, right?
**[06:38] Aqua**
That's right.
**[06:42] Kaz**
Okay, I pick you.
**[06:50] Aqua**
All right, stand there and
don't leave the magic circle—
**[06:54] Aqua**
What did you just say?
**[07:02] Angel**
We have heard your request.
**[07:04] Angel**
I shall take over your job
from here on out, Aqua-sama.
**[07:09] Aqua**
Huh?
**[07:10] Angel**
Satou Kazuma-san's wish complies with
the regulations and has been accepted.
**[07:14] Aqua**
Hey, what is all this? Wh-What?
You've got to be kidding.
**[07:18] Aqua**
No, no, no! Come on, um...
**[07:20] Aqua**
This is not right! Taking a goddess
with you is against the rules!
**[07:25] Aqua**
It must be illegal! This has to be illegal!
**[07:28] Aqua**
Wait! Wait!
**[07:30] Angel**
Please have a safe trip, Aqua-sama.
**[07:33] Angel**
Should you successfully defeat the Devil King,
**[07:35] Angel**
I will send someone to pick you up.
**[07:37] Aqua**
I may have the ability to
heal since I'm a goddess,
**[07:40] Aqua**
but I have no fighting ability to speak of!
**[07:42] Aqua**
There's no way I can beat the Devil King!
**[07:45] Aqua**
Hey, wait!
**[07:49] Kaz**
How does it feel to get dragged away with
the guy you treated like a total idiot?
**[07:56] Kaz**
You've been designated as the one
*thing* I'll be bringing along,
**[07:59] Kaz**
so if you're a goddess,
use your godly powers
**[08:01] Kaz**
or whatever to make my
life as easy as possible!
**[08:04] Aqua**
No!
**[08:05] Aqua**
I don't want to go to a parallel
world with a man like this!
**[08:13] Angel**
Brave hero, I pray that of the
great many prospective heroes,
**[08:17] Angel**
you will be the one to defeat the Devil King.
**[08:20] Angel**
If you do so, we shall grant any wish
**[08:23] Angel**
you desire as a gift from the gods.
**[08:25] Kaz**
Whoa, for real?!
**[08:28] Aqua**
That's my line!
**[08:29] Angel**
Now, go forth on your journey!
**[08:34] Aqua**
No!
***SIGN*** The Town of Beginning Adventurers
***SIGN*** The Town of Beginning Adventurers
***SIGN*** Axel
***SIGN*** The Town of Beginning Adventurers
***SIGN*** Axel
***SIGN*** The Town of Beginning Adventurers
***SIGN*** Axel
***SIGN*** The Town of Beginning Adventurers
***SIGN*** Axel
**[09:03] Kaz**
It's a parallel world.
**[09:05] Kaz**
Hey, this really is a parallel world!
**[09:07] Kaz**
W-Wait, I'm really going to be using magic
**[09:12] Kaz**
and going on adventures
in this world from now on?
**[09:18] Kaz**
Goodbye, shut-in life! Hello, new world!
**[09:22] Kaz**
I can really start anew in this world!
**[09:26] Kaz**
Hey, shut up.
**[09:27] Kaz**
What am I going to do if everyone
thinks I'm friends with a crazy woman?
**[09:31] Kaz**
More importantly, isn't there something you're
supposed to give me at a time like this?
**[09:35] Kaz**
Look at what I'm wearing. I'm in a tracksuit.
**[09:37] Kaz**
Here I am in a fantasy world,
and all I have is a single tracksuit.
**[09:41] Kaz**
Isn't there a bare minimum of
starter equipment I should—
**[09:53] Kaz**
Wh-What the heck?! Stop! Stop it!
**[09:55] Kaz**
I get it, okay?! I'm sorry!
**[09:58] Kaz**
If you hate it that much,
then you can go home.
**[10:00] Kaz**
I'll work out the rest on my own.
**[10:03] Aqua**
What are you talking about?!
**[10:04] Aqua**
I'm in trouble because I *can't* go back!
**[10:06] Aqua**
What do I do? Huh? What am I gonna do?
**[10:08] Aqua**
What am I supposed to do from now on?!
**[10:12] Kaz**
Hey, calm down, Goddess.
**[10:14] Kaz**
Times like these call for guilds.
**[10:16] Kaz**
Going to places like that to gather
intel is what you do in RPGs.
**[10:21] Aqua**
Huh? You're supposed to be
some game otaku shut-in.
**[10:25] Aqua**
Why are you so reliable?
**[10:27] Kaz**
All right! Let's go, Goddess.
**[10:28] Aqua**
Hey, wait.
**[10:31] Aqua**
You can call me "Goddess" if you like,
**[10:33] Aqua**
but when you can, call me "Aqua,"
so we don't cause a commotion.
**[10:36] Kaz**
I get it.
**[10:38] Kaz**
If you're a goddess,
**[10:39] Kaz**
wouldn't you know where we can
find an adventurer's guild?
**[10:42] Aqua**
I'm a goddess.
**[10:44] Aqua**
There's no way I'd know about
every little lowly place like that.
**[10:49] Kaz**
*This girl's useless...*
**[10:51] Shop**
Thanks for your business.
**[10:52] Customer**
Thank you. Up we go...
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
***SIGN*** Adventurer's Guild
**[10:57] Kaz**
Looks like this is the place.
**[11:04] Aqua**
Scary!
**[11:07] C**
Welcome! If you're here to eat,
please take any open seat.
**[11:11] C**
If you need job guidance,
head to the counter inside.
**[11:14] Kaz**
Thank you.
**[11:21] Man**
Hey!
**[11:23] Man**
Haven't seen you around here before.
**[11:26] Man**
And what's with the weird clothes?
**[11:29] Kaz**
Oh, we've actually come a long way,
and we just got into town.
**[11:36] Kaz**
I want to become an adventurer
to fight the Devil King's army, too.
**[11:41] Man**
Is that right, you reckless punk?
**[11:43] Man**
Welcome to the gates of Hell!
**[11:46] Man**
If you're lookin' for the guild
admission desk, it's over there.
**[11:52] Aqua**
Hey.
**[11:54] Aqua**
How can you make up a story
like that on the spot?
**[11:58] Kaz**
Listen, Aqua.
**[11:59] Aqua**
Okay.
**[12:00] Kaz**
Today we'll register with a guild
and find a place to stay the night.
**[12:04] Aqua**
G-Got it. I don't know anything about games,
**[12:07] Aqua**
but I guess that's how it works
in worlds like this, right?
**[12:10] Kaz**
Exactly. All right, let's go.
**[12:12] Aqua**
Oh, wait.
**[12:14] Aqua**
You seem like such a capable guy.
**[12:17] Aqua**
Why were you a shut-in otaku with
no friends or girlfriend before?
**[12:21] Aqua**
Why did you seclude yourself every day
and act like such a shut-in NEET?
**[12:24] Kaz**
Stop calling me a shut-in NEET, you bitch.
**[12:26] Kaz**
Don't lump "shut-in" and "NEET" together.
**[12:31] Luna**
Hello. What can I do for you today?
**[12:34] Kaz**
Um, we'd like to become adventurers.
**[12:36] Luna**
I see.
**[12:38] Luna**
In that case, you'll first need
to pay the registration fee.
**[12:41] Kaz**
Sure, sure...
**[12:42] Kaz**
Huh? Registration fee?
**[12:46] Kaz**
Do you have any money?
**[12:48] Aqua**
You dragged me here without any warning.
**[12:50] Aqua**
Of course I don't.
**[12:52] Kaz**
*This girl's useless...*
**[13:02] A**
Are you ready to order?
**[13:04] Kaz**
Um, I'm still thinking about it...
**[13:07] A**
Please take your time.
**[13:09] Kaz**
Hey, what should we do?
**[13:11] Kaz**
We've already hit a roadblock.
**[13:13] Kaz**
Normally we'd get a minimal
amount of equipment
**[13:16] Kaz**
and enough to cover basic
living expenses, at least.
**[13:19] Kaz**
This is totally inhospitable.
**[13:20] Aqua**
There goes your reliability, just like that.
**[13:23] Aqua**
Well, I guess it was inevitable.
You *are* a shut-in NEET.
**[13:26] Kaz**
Don't call me a shut-in NEET.
**[13:27] Aqua**
Fine. I guess it's my turn now.
**[13:30] Aqua**
Let me show you what a goddess can do!
**[13:36] Aqua**
You there, priest! State your denomination!
**[13:40] Aqua**
I'm Aqua.
**[13:41] Aqua**
Yes, the object of worship for the
Religious Order of Axis: the goddess Aqua!
**[13:46] Aqua**
If thou art one of my followers...
**[13:50] Aqua**
It'd be a huge help if you
could lend me some money!
**[13:54] Priest**
I'm in the Eris Sect, actually...
**[13:59] Aqua**
Oh, you are? I'm sorry.
**[14:03] Priest**
Oh, young lady, are you with the Axis Sect?
**[14:07] Priest**
The relationship of the goddesses Aqua and
Eris is that of superior and subordinate.
**[14:11] Priest**
This must be fate. I saw earlier that
you couldn't cover the fee, correct?
**[14:17] Priest**
Here. Please consider this
Eris-sama's divine blessing.
**[14:21] Priest**
Still, no matter how devout a believer you
are, you mustn't call yourself a goddess.
**[14:25] Aqua**
Uh, yes. I'm sorry.
**[14:28] Aqua**
Thank you very much...
**[14:33] Aqua**
He didn't even believe that I'm a goddess.
**[14:36] Aqua**
By the way, Eris is a goddess ranked beneath me.
**[14:41] Aqua**
A believer in my subordinate took pity on me
**[14:46] Aqua**
and lent me money...
**[14:48] Kaz**
Y-Yeah...
**[14:56] Kaz**
Um, we've brought the registration fee.
**[15:00] Luna**
S-Sure...
**[15:02] Kaz**
* Something told me she didn't want*
* to make eye contact with us.*
**[15:06] Luna**
Allow me to formally explain.
**[15:08] Luna**
Adventurers each have their own occupations.
**[15:12] Luna**
This is your registration card.
**[15:15] Luna**
It keeps track of how many
monsters you've vanquished.
**[15:18] Luna**
As your level increases, you'll earn
points that you can use to learn skills,
**[15:23] Luna**
so please work hard to raise your level.
**[15:25] Luna**
Now, both of you, please hold
your hands over this crystal.
**[15:30] Kaz**
Like this?
**[15:46] Luna**
With this, you will each
learn your current status,
**[15:49] Luna**
so please choose your desired
occupation based on your stats.
**[15:53] Kaz**
*Here it comes!*
**[15:54] Kaz**
* Now my tremendous latent*
* abilities will be made apparent,*
**[15:57] Kaz**
* and there'll be an uproar*
* throughout the guild!*
**[16:03] Luna**
Yes, thank you very much.
**[16:06] Luna**
Satou Kazuma-san, is it? Let me see...
**[16:10] Luna**
Average across the board.
**[16:12] Luna**
With the exception of
decently high intelligence...
**[16:14] Luna**
Oh? Your luck is extraordinarily high.
**[16:17] Luna**
Of course, luck isn't a very
essential stat for an adventurer...
**[16:21] Luna**
With this much luck,
**[16:23] Luna**
I'd recommend becoming a
merchant or something similar...
**[16:27] Kaz**
Hey, she's disapproving of my adventurer's
lifestyle right off the bat.
**[16:30] Kaz**
What's going on?
**[16:32] Kaz**
U-Um,
**[16:34] Kaz**
make my primary job "adventurer," please.
**[16:36] Luna**
W-Well, you can always
change jobs when you level up!
**[16:41] Kaz**
Y-You're right!
**[16:43] Kaz**
*The weakest job, huh?*
**[16:49] Luna**
Aside from your intelligence
being below average,
**[16:51] Luna**
and your luck being the
lowest possible level,
**[16:53] Luna**
all of your stats are
drastically above average!
**[16:57] Aqua**
What? Does that mean I'm really amazing?
**[16:59] Luna**
A-Amazing is an understatement!
**[17:03] Luna**
The mage class, which requires
intelligence, is out of the question,
**[17:06] Luna**
but other than that,
you can be anything you want!
**[17:08] Luna**
A crusader, sword master, arch priest...
**[17:12] Luna**
Nearly any advanced class right from the start!
**[17:14] Aqua**
I see. It's a shame there's
no "goddess" occupation,
**[17:18] Aqua**
but in my case, maybe I'll be an
arch priest who heals her allies.
**[17:21] Luna**
An arch priest!
**[17:23] Luna**
An almighty class that commands
all recovery and support magic,
**[17:27] Luna**
and that boasts enough strength
to stand at the front line!
**[17:36] Luna**
Without further ado, welcome to
our adventurer's guild, Aqua-sama.
**[17:40] Luna**
All of our staff will be looking
forward to your future exploits.
**[17:45] A**
Starting off as an arch priest is incredible!
**[17:49] Man**
Someone like you might actually be able
to beat the Devil King, you reckless girl!
**[17:54] Kaz**
No event like this is going to happen for me?
**[17:57] Aqua**
It's the adventurer's life for
us starting today, Kazuma!
**[18:00] Kaz**
I thought you absolutely hated all this.
**[18:03] Aqua**
Did I?
**[18:12] Kaz**
* Well, anyway, everything thus far has*
* been basically character creation.*
**[18:17] Kaz**
*Now our adventure is finally about to begin!*
**[20:08] Kaz**
Wait, this isn't right!
**[20:09] Aqua**
What isn't?
**[20:11] Kaz**
No, wait a second!
**[20:13] Aqua**
What's wrong? Did you forget to
use the bathroom before bed?
**[20:16] Aqua**
It's dark. Want me to go with you?
**[20:18] Kaz**
No need! It's not that!
**[20:21] Lady**
Keep it down!
**[20:23] Both**
W-We're sorry!
**[20:29] Kaz**
We didn't come here to be laborers.
**[20:31] Aqua**
Oh, that's right!
**[20:34] Aqua**
I need you to defeat the Devil King,
or I'll never be able to go home!
**[20:44] Kaz**
* Her intelligence stat was*
* lower than a human's.*
**[20:49] Kaz**
* All of the monsters near town have*
* been long since exterminated.*
**[20:51] Kaz**
* With no monsters, there's no need*
* for anyone to give us any fetch quests.*
**[20:57] Kaz**
*I didn't want to learn something so realistic...*
**[21:00] Lady**
Thanks for your business!
**[21:15] Aqua**
What?
**[21:20] Kaz**
It's nothing.
**[21:22] Aqua**
Say...
**[21:24] Aqua**
I was just thinking.
**[21:26] Aqua**
Let's go away from here and do a kill quest.
**[21:29] Kaz**
We're level one. We don't even
have full sets of equipment.
**[21:32] Aqua**
It'll be fine. As long as you have
me around, it'll be over in a flash!
**[21:37] Aqua**
You can count on it!
**[21:39] Kaz**
I feel very uneasy about this.
**[21:41] Aqua**
Who do you think I am?
**[21:44] Kaz**
That's right. You *are* a goddess, after all.
**[21:48] Aqua**
Yeah! Leave it to me.
**[21:52] Kaz**
*And so our adventure began,*
**[21:55] Kaz**
*for real this... time.*
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 1
***SIGN*** "This Self-Proclaimed Goddess and Reincarnation in Another World!"
***SIGN*** Mom, I've come to a parallel world. I feel refreshed, as if I've been reborn. I've found a home and a job, and I'm full of energy. And best of all, a goddess has come along with me. So please don't worry about me. I'll be all right... I'll be all right... Probably...
***SIGN*** Episode 2
***SIGN*** An Explosion For This Chuunibyou!
# E2 - An Explosion for This Chuunibyo!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR49M8EZ6/an-explosion-for-this-chunibyo)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:19] Kaz**
This isn't how I imagined
life in a parallel world would be.
**[00:23] Kaz**
Income is unstable for a beginner adventurer,
**[00:27] Kaz**
so sleeping in a stable is normal...
**[00:31] Kaz**
Now that I think about it, adventurers are
**[00:33] Kaz**
basically insignificant,
job-hopping part-timers.
**[00:37] Kaz**
Job-hoppers can't even
**[00:38] Kaz**
afford to stay in hotels in
a place as affluent as Japan.
**[00:43] Kaz**
Minimum wage?
**[00:44] Kaz**
Fair labor standards?
**[00:46] Kaz**
What are those? Are they tasty?
**[00:52] Aqua**
Good morning.
**[00:54] Kaz**
Don't "good morning" me.
**[00:56] Kaz**
It's almost noon.
**[00:58] Kaz**
Weren't we going on a kill quest?
**[01:02] Aqua**
Once I realized we didn't have to go to our
construction job, I couldn't help myself.
**[01:07] Kaz**
* What happened to her saying*
* I could "count on" her yesterday?*
**[01:10] Kaz**
So, wasn't this world supposed to be under
**[01:13] Kaz**
attack by the Devil King, and in a huge crisis?
**[01:15] Kaz**
This is as peaceful as it gets!
**[01:17] Kaz**
There's no sign of evil influence anywhere.
**[01:20] Aqua**
This is the furthest city
from the Devil King's castle.
**[01:23] Aqua**
Besides, he wouldn't go out of
his way to attack a city with
**[01:26] Aqua**
nothing but novice adventurers in it.
**[01:29] Kaz**
I guess...
**[01:30] Aqua**
Now, let's go on that kill quest!
**[01:34] Aqua**
You can count on me!
**[01:37] Kaz**
Something tells me you said
something similar yesterday.
**[01:41] Kaz**
But it is true that you're a goddess.
**[01:44] Kaz**
I'm counting on you.
**[01:45] Kaz**
All right, let's put together the most
basic equipment we can and head out.
**[01:49] Aqua**
Yeah!
**[01:51] Stable**
How long are you gonna hang around?!
You wanna get walloped?!
**[01:54] Both**
W-We're sorry!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 2
***SIGN*** "An Explosion for This Chunibyo!"
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Defeat 5 "Giant Toads"
In 3 Days
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
**[03:41] Kaz**
Save me, Aqua!
**[03:44] Kaz**
Save me— Whoa!
**[03:47] Aqua**
Oh, man, this is hysterical!
**[03:49] Aqua**
Kazuma, your face is red and
you have tears in your eyes!
**[03:52] Aqua**
You look super desperate!
**[03:54] Kaz**
*I'll bury her later, before I head home!*
**[03:57] Kaz**
*Giant Toads.*
**[03:59] Kaz**
*These guys can't be dismissed as simple frogs.*
**[04:02] Kaz**
*When mating season comes,*
**[04:03] Kaz**
*they show up in settlements with lots of prey,*
**[04:06] Kaz**
*and swallow the farmers' goats whole*
**[04:08] Kaz**
* to build up strength in*
* preparation to lay their eggs.*
**[04:12] Kaz**
* In fact, farmers and children*
* from the settlement*
**[04:15] Kaz**
* tend to go missing during these*
* frogs' mating season every year.*
**[04:20] Kaz**
*By the way, their meat is somewhat tough,*
**[04:22] Kaz**
*but it's so light and refreshing*
**[04:24] Kaz**
*that it's a highly coveted ingredient.*
**[04:27] Aqua**
Kazuma!
**[04:29] Aqua**
If you want me to save you,
**[04:30] Aqua**
why don't you start by adding
"san" to the end of my name?!
**[04:34] Kaz**
Aqua-sama!
**[04:36] Aqua**
I guess I have no choice.
**[04:38] Aqua**
I'll help you out, you shut-in NEET!
**[04:40] Aqua**
In return, you'd better worship
me from tomorrow onward!
**[04:44] Kaz**
Huh?
**[04:45] Aqua**
When we get back to town,
join the Axis Sect
**[04:48] Aqua**
and pray to me three times a day.
**[04:50] Aqua**
At meal time, when I say "Gimme,"
**[04:52] Aqua**
you'll hand your food
over without resistance.
**[04:55] Aqua**
And—
**[05:02] Kaz**
Don't get eaten!
**[05:06] Both**
KONOSUBA!
**[05:11] Kaz**
Good thing the frog stopped moving
around while it was eating you.
**[05:19] Aqua**
Thank you, Kazuma!
**[05:22] Aqua**
Thank you!
**[05:23] Aqua**
Thank you so much!
**[05:27] Kaz**
*She smells disgusting!*
**[05:29] Kaz**
Um, let's head back for today.
**[05:31] Kaz**
These guys are more than we can handle.
**[05:35] Kaz**
Let's do this after we get
more equipment together.
**[05:39] Aqua**
I'm all dirty now.
**[05:42] Aqua**
If the followers of Axis
see me sullied like this,
**[05:45] Aqua**
I'll lose their devotion!
**[05:47] Aqua**
If it gets out that I backed
down from a lowly frog,
**[05:50] Aqua**
the name of the beautiful and stunning
Aqua-sama will fall by the wayside!
**[05:54] Kaz**
* She's normally happy as can be to work*
* up a sweat with the older workers,*
**[05:58] Kaz**
*and looks forward to her post-bath dinner*
**[06:00] Kaz**
*and a good, hard drink most of all.*
**[06:03] Kaz**
*She even drools while she sleeps in the stable.*
**[06:06] Kaz**
* It's a little late to complain*
* about being "dirty"...*
**[06:11] Kaz**
Hey! Wait, Aqua!
**[06:12] Aqua**
Feel the power of the gods!
**[06:15] Aqua**
Regret that you ever stood in my path
**[06:17] Aqua**
and bared your fangs at the gods,
**[06:19] Aqua**
and repent in the pits of Hell!
**[06:22] Aqua**
God Blow!
**[06:25] Aqua**
"God Blow" is a lethal fist that carries
a goddess's rage and sorrow!
**[06:30] Aqua**
Any it strikes will perish!
**[06:38] Aqua**
N-Now that I have a good look at you,
I think frogs are pretty cute.
**[06:43] Kaz**
Aqua!
***SIGN*** 2 Giant Toads Killed
***SIGN*** Today's Results
***SIGN*** Eris
**[06:59] Man**
Miss, another over here!
**[07:02] Aqua**
There's no way the two of us
can take them on alone.
**[07:04] Aqua**
Let's recruit more allies!
**[07:05] Kaz**
5,000 eris per frog...
**[07:09] Kaz**
We risked our lives and earned no more
than part-time construction work pays.
**[07:13] Aqua**
This is surprisingly tasty.
**[07:15] Aqua**
It's a little tough, but the texture's quite nice.
**[07:18] Kaz**
You say "allies,"
**[07:20] Kaz**
but we're beginners with
no decent equipment.
**[07:22] Kaz**
Do you really think anyone
will party up with us?
**[07:24] Aqua**
You've got me here, so allies—
**[07:26] Kaz**
Swallow your food!
Swallow your food, *then* talk!
**[07:30] Aqua**
I'm an arch priest, the most
advanced job there is!
**[07:33] Aqua**
Anyone would kill to have me in their party!
**[07:37] Aqua**
If I offhandedly decided to recruit members,
**[07:39] Aqua**
there'd be tons of people saying,
"Please! Take me with you!"
**[07:43] Aqua**
Now that we've got that straight,
hand me another piece of fried frog!
**[07:47] Kaz**
Oh?
***SIGN*** The Next Day
**[07:59] Aqua**
Nobody's coming.
**[08:03] Kaz**
* More than half a day passed after*
* we posted the recruitment offer,*
**[08:06] Kaz**
*but no prospective future heroes showed up.*
**[08:08] 1**
No way.
**[08:09] 2**
You said it.
**[08:11] Aqua**
* Immediate opening!*
* We're a cozy, harmonious party.*
**[08:14] Aqua**
*Any adventurers who wish to journey with*
**[08:17] Aqua**
* the beautiful and noble arch priest,*
* Aqua-sama, need look no further!*
**[08:20] Aqua(ReviewA)**
* I've been happy every day*
* since I joined this party.*
**[08:23] Aqua(ReviewA)**
*I definitely hit the jackpot!*
**[08:26] Aqua(ReviewB)**
*I got over my illness and became popular,*
**[08:28] Aqua(ReviewB)**
*all thanks to joining Aqua-sama's party!*
**[08:31] Aqua**
* Hiring requirements: adventurers*
* in advanced job classes only.*
**[08:37] Kaz**
Hey, let's lower the bar a little.
**[08:40] Kaz**
Recruiting only members in
advanced jobs is way too strict.
**[08:44] Aqua**
But... But...
**[08:46] Kaz**
At this rate, not a single person will come.
**[08:49] Kaz**
I mean, you might have an advanced job,
but I'm still in the weakest.
**[08:54] Kaz**
I'll feel ashamed if I'm completely
surrounded by the elite.
**[08:56] Megu**
I happened to notice your recruitment poster.
**[09:02] Megu**
That we would meet is a fate
chosen by the world itself.
**[09:05] Megu**
I have anxiously awaited the arrival
of those such as yourselves.
**[09:14] Megu**
My name is Megumin!
**[09:16] Megu**
My calling is that of an arch wizard,
**[09:18] Megu**
one who controls explosion magic,
**[09:19] Megu**
the strongest of all offensive magic!
**[09:25] Kaz**
Um...
**[09:28] Megu**
Do you, too, desire my forbidden strength,
**[09:29] Megu**
which is so almighty, I've been
ostracized by the entire world?
**[09:33] Kaz**
Huh?
**[09:35] Megu**
Then show me thine resolve to peer
into the ultimate abyss with me!
**[09:40] Megu**
When man stares into the abyss,
the abyss stares back.
**[09:47] Kaz**
Are you just here to poke fun at us?
**[09:48] Megu**
N-No!
**[09:51] Aqua**
That red eye... Are you a crimson demon?
**[09:55] Megu**
Indeed! I am Megumin, user of the
finest magic crimson demons possess!
**[09:59] Megu**
My lethal magic demolishes mountains,
**[10:03] Megu**
smashes boulders...
**[10:07] Kaz**
Hey, what's wrong?!
**[10:12] Megu**
I haven't eaten anything in three days.
**[10:15] Megu**
Do you have anything I could eat?
**[10:18] Kaz**
I don't mind treating you,
**[10:20] Kaz**
but what's with the eyepatch?
**[10:22] Kaz**
If you're injured, why don't
we have her heal you?
**[10:25] Kaz**
Her one strong suit is healing magic.
**[10:28] Aqua**
My "one"?!
**[10:30] Megu**
This is the magic item that
suppresses my mighty magical powers.
**[10:35] Megu**
If I were ever to take this off,
**[10:37] Megu**
a great catastrophe would
surely befall this world...
**[10:41] Kaz**
So it's like a seal?
**[10:44] Megu**
Well, that was a lie.
**[10:46] Megu**
I just wear it for looks.
**[10:49] Megu**
I'm sorry! Please don't pull on it!
**[10:52] Megu**
Stop... Stop it!
**[10:54] Aqua**
You know,
**[10:55] Megu**
Please cut it out!
**[10:55] Aqua**
crimson demons are born with high
intelligence, and possess magical powers.
**[10:56] Megu**
Actually, it'll hurt if you just let go,
**[10:59] Megu**
so please just slowly put it back where it was.
**[11:00] Aqua**
Generally, they're all expert magicians,
**[11:02] Aqua**
and all have weird names.
**[11:03] Megu**
That's right, slowly, slowly...
**[11:05] Kaz**
Oh?
**[11:06] Megu**
Ow! My eye!
**[11:09] Kaz**
Sorry. I thought you were making fun of us.
**[11:12] Kaz**
You were talking gibberish
and gave us that weird name.
**[11:16] Megu**
Calling my name weird is rude.
**[11:18] Megu**
From my point of view, it's everyone
else in town who has a weird name.
**[11:23] Kaz**
By the way, what are your parents' names?
**[11:25] Megu**
My mother is Yuiyui and
my father is Hyoizaburo!
**[11:32] Kaz**
So this girl's clan has a lot
of good magicians, right?
**[11:36] Megu**
Hey! If you've got something to say
about my parents' names, let's hear it!
**[11:40] Megu**
Hyoizaburo!
**[11:48] Aqua**
Adventurer cards can't be forged.
**[11:50] Aqua**
She's an arch wizard for sure.
**[11:54] Aqua**
It's an advanced job that commands
powerful offensive magic!
**[11:56] Kaz**
Yeah, this girl's magic stat *is* high...
**[12:00] Aqua**
Also, if she really can use explosion
magic, then that's amazing!
**[12:05] Aqua**
It's the most advanced attack magic there is!
**[12:08] Megu**
Hey, don't call me "this girl" and "she."
**[12:11] Megu**
I'd prefer you called me by name.
**[12:18] Kaz**
Well, go ahead and order
something, "arch wizard."
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Defeat 5 "Giant Toads" In 3 Days
***SIGN*** Quest Progress 2/5
**[12:29] Megu**
Explosion magic is the strongest magic.
**[12:32] Megu**
But that also means it takes time to prepare.
**[12:36] Megu**
Please keep that frog at bay until
my preparations are complete.
**[12:40] Kaz**
Right. I'll do it.
**[12:43] Aqua**
Kazuma, there's another over there!
**[12:45] Kaz**
Two at once?
**[12:49] Kaz**
Target the frog in the distance with your magic.
**[12:52] Megu**
Understood.
**[12:53] Kaz**
As for the closer one...
**[12:54] Kaz**
Hey, let's go, Aqua.
**[12:56] Kaz**
You *are* a former something-or-other, right?
**[12:58] Kaz**
Show off some of your former ability.
**[13:01] Aqua**
What do you mean "former"?!
**[13:02] Aqua**
I *am* a goddess! Present tense!
**[13:05] Megu**
Goddess?
**[13:07] Kaz**
Oh, she just calls herself one. It's rather sad.
**[13:10] Kaz**
She blurts out stuff like this at times,
**[13:12] Kaz**
but it's best not to pay it any mind.
**[13:14] Megu**
How sad...
**[13:16] Aqua**
Wh-What?! These frogs may be
strong against physical attacks,
**[13:20] Aqua**
but this time for sure...
**[13:22] Aqua**
Watch this, Kazuma!
**[13:23] Aqua**
I'll show you the powers of
a goddess today for sure!
**[13:27] Aqua**
Tremble before me and fall asleep!
**[13:29] Aqua**
God Requiem!
**[13:31] Aqua**
"God Requiem" is a goddess's
requiem of love and sorrow!
**[13:35] Aqua**
Any it strikes will perish!
**[13:44] Kaz**
That's a goddess for you.
**[13:45] Kaz**
She put her life on the line to buy us time.
**[13:50] Megu**
Darkness blacker than black
and darker than dark,
**[13:53] Megu**
I beseech thee, combine with my deep crimson.
**[13:56] Megu**
The time of awakening cometh.
**[13:58] Megu**
Justice, fallen upon the infallible boundary,
**[14:01] Megu**
appear now as an intangible distortion!
**[14:03] Megu**
Dance, dance, dance!
**[14:06] Megu**
I desire for my torrent of
power a destructive force:
**[14:09] Megu**
a destructive force without equal!
**[14:12] Megu**
Return all creation to cinders,
**[14:14] Megu**
and come from the abyss!
**[14:16] Megu**
This is the mightiest means
of attack known to man,
**[14:20] Megu**
the ultimate attack magic! Explosion!
**[14:48] Kaz**
Wow...
**[14:50] Kaz**
So this is magic?
**[14:57] Kaz**
Did the explosion wake it up?
**[15:00] Kaz**
Megumin! Let's back off for now and—
**[15:04] Kaz**
Huh?
**[15:06] Megu**
While my mystic art, explosion magic,
**[15:08] Megu**
possesses tremendous might,
**[15:10] Megu**
it also consumes tremendous magical power.
**[15:13] Megu**
In short,
**[15:15] Megu**
I used magic exceeding my limits,
**[15:18] Megu**
so now I can't move a muscle.
**[15:20] Kaz**
Huh?
**[15:22] Megu**
I never expected a frog to pop up so close by.
**[15:26] Megu**
This is bad.
**[15:27] Megu**
I'm going to be eaten.
**[15:28] Megu**
Sorry, could you help me ou—
**[15:35] Kaz**
Y-You guys! Don't get eaten!
***SIGN*** Killed 3 Giant Toads
***SIGN*** Today's Results
***SIGN*** Successfully Defeated 5 Total
***SIGN*** Quest Complete
**[15:48] ---**
Wow! Check out this tadpole!
**[15:50] ---**
Whoa, it's huge!
**[15:53] Aqua**
I stink... I stink!
**[15:57] Megu**
The inside of a frog stinks,
**[15:59] Megu**
but it feels nice and warm...
**[16:02] Kaz**
That's information I didn't need to know.
**[16:05] Kaz**
You're banned from using explosion
magic, except in emergencies.
**[16:09] Kaz**
Just do your best with some
other magic from now on.
**[16:12] Megu**
I can't.
**[16:13] Kaz**
Huh?
**[16:15] Megu**
I can only use explosion magic.
**[16:17] Megu**
I can't use any other type of magic.
**[16:21] Kaz**
For real?
**[16:23] Megu**
For real.
**[16:27] Girl**
Hey, wait right there!
**[16:29] Aqua**
Huh?
**[16:30] Aqua**
If your level is high enough
to use explosion magic,
**[16:32] Aqua**
shouldn't you be able
to use other magic, too?
**[16:35] Aqua**
Even I didn't learn all the arch priest spells
**[16:39] Aqua**
until after I learned the party trick skills.
**[16:42] Kaz**
What the heck would you use
"party trick" skills for?
**[16:44] Megu**
I'm an arch wizard who loves
explosion magic above all else.
**[16:48] Megu**
I don't like any other magic
in the detonation family.
**[16:52] Megu**
I only like explosion magic!
**[16:54] Megu**
I could, of course, easily go on
adventures if I learned other magic,
**[16:58] Megu**
but that just won't do!
**[16:59] Megu**
I only love explosion magic!
**[17:02] Megu**
Even if only one use per day is my limit,
**[17:04] Megu**
or I collapse after using my magic,
**[17:07] Megu**
explosion magic is still
the only magic I'll ever love!
**[17:10] Megu**
After all, I chose the path of an arch wizard
**[17:13] Megu**
solely so I could use explosion magic!
**[17:19] Aqua**
Wonderful! Simply wonderful!
**[17:21] Aqua**
Inefficient though it is,
I'm moved by your romantic pursuit!
**[17:26] Kaz**
*Damn, this magician's hopeless.*
**[17:30] Kaz**
* The fact that Aqua sympathizes*
* with her proves it.*
**[17:34] Kaz**
*Based on these two fights,*
**[17:36] Kaz**
* I highly suspect this goddess*
* is completely useless, too.*
**[17:41] Kaz**
* Frankly, I don't need any more*
* problem children to put up with.*
**[17:45] Kaz**
I see!
**[17:47] Kaz**
I'm sure the path ahead of you
will be thorny, but do your best!
**[17:49] Kaz**
Once we reach the guild,
we'll split the reward evenly,
**[17:51] Kaz**
then when we get a chance,
let's meet up somewhere—
**[17:54] Megu**
My only desire is to use my explosion magic.
**[17:58] Megu**
I'd be fine with going unpaid if need be.
**[18:01] Megu**
Yes, an arch wizard's
mighty power can be yours,
**[18:04] Megu**
for the low cost of food and sundries!
**[18:07] Megu**
What choice do you have but to make
a long-term contract with me?
**[18:10] Kaz**
No, no, no.
**[18:12] Kaz**
Such mighty power would be wasted on a
puny party of novice adventurers like us.
**[18:17] Megu**
No, no, no.
**[18:18] Megu**
It's fine, even if you are puny or novices!
**[18:21] Megu**
I have an advanced job,
but I'm only level six.
**[18:24] Megu**
Hey, I wish you wouldn't
try to tear my hand away!
**[18:27] Kaz**
No, no, no, no.
**[18:28] Kaz**
What kind of magician can
only use a spell once a day?!
**[18:33] Kaz**
* This girl's got a surprisingly*
* strong grip, for a magician!*
**[18:36] Kaz**
Hey, let go!
**[18:37] Kaz**
You got dumped by another party, didn't you?!
**[18:40] Kaz**
I said let go!
**[18:41] Kaz**
Heck, if we go into a dungeon, there won't
be enough room to use explosion magic!
**[18:45] Kaz**
You get more useless by the second!
**[18:46] Aqua**
Hey, stop! You're getting it on my face!
**[18:48] Megu**
No other parties will take me anymore!
**[18:52] Megu**
I'll carry your stuff,
or whatever else you need!
**[18:54] Megu**
I'm begging you! Please don't abandon me!
**[18:56] A**
How awful. That man's going
to abandon a little girl!
**[19:00] B**
And he's got a girl covered
in snot beside him.
**[19:03] A**
Toying with such a little girl, then
discarding her? What a scumbag!
**[19:06] C**
Look! Both those girls are all slimy!
**[19:10] C**
What sort of acts did that
pervert perform on them?!
**[19:13] Kaz**
I-It's not like that!
**[19:21] Megu**
I'm fine with whatever erotic acts you like!
**[19:25] Megu**
I'll show you I can even endure that
slimy act we used those frogs for!
**[19:28] Kaz**
All right, I get it!
**[19:30] Kaz**
Glad to have you aboard!
**[19:32] All**
KONOSUBA!
**[19:37] Luna**
I've confirmed that you
have completed your quest.
**[19:39] Luna**
Thank you for your hard work.
**[19:41] Kaz**
I went up four levels all at once.
**[19:44] Kaz**
You really do get stronger just
by defeating some monsters...
**[19:48] Luna**
The newer the adventurer,
the faster you'll grow.
**[19:51] Luna**
Now then, adding up the
sale of the giant toads
**[19:54] Luna**
and your quest completion reward,
**[19:56] Luna**
your total comes to 110,000 eris.
**[19:59] Luna**
Please verify the amount.
**[20:05] Kaz**
110,000... Split between three people,
**[20:09] Kaz**
that comes to around 36,000 eris each.
**[20:15] Kaz**
We nearly lost our lives for
a reward of 36,000 each.
**[20:19] Kaz**
It's not worth it.
**[20:21] Kaz**
I checked the other quests just in case, but...
**[20:24] A**
* I want someone to search*
* for my lost pet white wolf.*
**[20:28] B**
* I want someone to teach*
* my son swordsmanship.*
**[20:30] B**
* Requirements: rune knights*
* or sword masters only.*
**[20:34] C**
* Looking for a practice partner*
* for magical experiments.*
**[20:37] C**
* Requirements: must have high HP or*
* confidence in their magic resistance!*
**[20:42] Kaz**
Yeah, it's no use.
**[20:48] Kaz**
I want to go back to Japan.
**[20:50] Kaz**
The ally we recruited is a lost cause.
**[20:53] Kaz**
Living in this world isn't gonna be easy.
**[20:56] Dark**
I happened to see your recruitment poster.
**[21:01] Dark**
Are you still recruiting party members?
**[21:06] Kaz**
Um...
**[21:08] Kaz**
We are!
**[21:10] Kaz**
Though, I wouldn't really recommend it...
**[21:14] Kaz**
*A female knight.*
**[21:15] Kaz**
*An extraordinarily beautiful one at that!*
**[21:18] Kaz**
* She's such a gorgeous older*
* woman, I got so nervous*
**[21:21] Kaz**
*that my voice squeaked a little.*
**[21:24] Kaz**
* It's an adverse effect of*
* my long life as a shut-in!*
**[21:27] Dark**
I see. Thank goodness.
**[21:30] Dark**
I have anxiously awaited the arrival
of someone such as yourself.
**[21:39] Dark**
My name is Darkness.
**[21:42] Dark**
My calling is that of a crusader.
**[21:51] Dark**
Please let... Please let me...
**[21:55] Dark**
j-j-join your party!
***SIGN*** Dad, I've gotten totally used to my life here in this parallel world. My days are busy, spent with my dependable companions. Work is going well, and I've been commended, saying I'll be promoted extraordinarily quickly. I'm so content with life that I never feel exhausted, lonely, or resentful. It's true. I'm telling the truth, okay?
***SIGN*** Episode 3
***SIGN*** A Panty Treasure in This Right Hand!
# E3 - A Panty Treasure in This Right Hand!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRJQ1DGWY/a-panty-treasure-in-this-right-hand)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Dark**
My name is Darkness.
**[00:03] Dark**
My calling is that of a crusader.
**[00:06] Dark**
Would you please...
**[00:09] Dark**
Would you please let me join your p-p-party?
**[00:16] Kaz**
Um...
**[00:18] Dark**
Those two slimy ladies earlier
were allies of yours, right?
**[00:21] Dark**
What in the world did that to them?
**[00:23] Kaz**
Oh, uh...
**[00:24] Kaz**
They were swallowed by
Giant Toads, and the mucus—
**[00:27] Dark**
What?!
**[00:28] Dark**
It's worse than I imagined...
**[00:31] Kaz**
*What's with this woman knight?*
**[00:33] Dark**
No, wait!
**[00:35] Dark**
As a knight, I cannot overlook
such horrors befalling two girls
**[00:38] Dark**
of such a tender age!
**[00:40] Kaz**
*Her eyes are scaring me...*
**[00:41] Kaz**
*She's setting off my danger radar.*
**[00:44] Kaz**
* It's telling me something's up with her,*
* just like Aqua and Megumin.*
**[00:48] Kaz**
No, I'd advise against it.
**[00:51] Kaz**
It's hard to say how useful
one of our members is,
**[00:53] Kaz**
another can only use her magic once per day,
**[00:56] Kaz**
and I'm the lowest job class.
**[00:58] Kaz**
Our party's total trash,
**[00:59] Kaz**
so I'd recommend you look elsewhe— Ow, ow, ow!
**[01:02] Dark**
That's even better!
**[01:04] Dark**
The truth is, this was a bit
difficult for me to say,
**[01:09] Dark**
but while I have confidence in my
strength and stamina, I am clumsy...
**[01:14] Dark**
So, um...
**[01:15] Dark**
None of my attacks ever hit their mark.
**[01:18] Kaz**
*Looks like my sensor was spot-on.*
**[01:21] Dark**
As such,
**[01:23] Dark**
I'll charge to the front line,
**[01:25] Dark**
so please use me as a shield!
**[01:26] Kaz**
*Her face is too close!*
**[01:28] Kaz**
* The negative effects of my long life*
* as a shut-in are kicking in now?!*
**[01:32] Kaz**
*No, that isn't it!*
**[01:33] Kaz**
* This is just too stimulating for*
* an adolescent virgin like me!*
**[01:36] Kaz**
* Stay calm... Don't be seduced*
* by her womanly charms!*
**[01:40] Kaz**
No.
**[01:41] Kaz**
I could never use a woman as a shield.
**[01:44] Dark**
It would be my pleasure!
**[01:46] Kaz**
Well, we get eaten by
monsters in every battle.
**[01:48] Dark**
That would be even *more* my pleasure!
**[01:52] Kaz**
*Oh, I get it.*
**[01:54] Kaz**
* It's not just her abilities.*
* She's hopeless to the core.*
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 3
***SIGN*** "A Panty Treasure in This Right Hand!"
**[03:33] Kaz**
I was so worn out, I slept until noon...
**[03:35] Aqua**
Hup!
**[03:39] Aqua**
There!
**[03:46] Aqua**
Thank you! Thank you!
**[03:47] Aqua**
Thank you!
**[03:49] Aqua**
Oh, look, Kazuma!
**[03:51] Aqua**
What do you think of my newly acquired skill?
**[03:53] Aqua**
Isn't it befitting of a
water goddess like myself?
**[03:57] Kaz**
* Isn't that a party trick skill,*
* you low-grade goddess?*
**[04:00] Aqua**
KONOSUBA!
**[04:03] Kaz**
You can learn skills with the
points you've saved up, huh?
**[04:07] Kaz**
I'll have to be careful not to
use them on any weird skills.
**[04:14] Megu**
First you get someone to
teach you how to use a skill.
**[04:18] Megu**
Then the entry will appear on your card.
**[04:22] Megu**
If you use your points on that entry,
you'll finish learning it.
**[04:25] Kaz**
Does that mean if I have you teach me,
**[04:28] Kaz**
I could learn to use explosion magic, too?
**[04:31] Megu**
Exactly!
**[04:32] Megu**
That's exactly right, Kazuma!
**[04:34] Megu**
If you want to learn explosion magic,
**[04:35] Megu**
I'll teach you as much as you want!
**[04:37] Megu**
Heck, is there any other skill
more worthwhile to learn?
**[04:41] Megu**
No, there certainly is not!
**[04:43] Megu**
Come, now, and walk the
path of explosions with me!
**[04:47] Kaz**
*Her face is too close...*
**[04:49] Kaz**
Hey, calm... calm down, little girl!
**[04:53] Kaz**
Besides, I only have three points right now...
**[04:55] Megu**
L-Little girl?
**[04:58] Kaz**
Huh?
**[05:08] Megu**
*I'm* a little girl?
**[05:12] Kaz**
I wonder if there's some quick and easy skill...
**[05:15] Kaz**
One that'll be a good value,
that doesn't take many points to learn.
**[05:18] Dark**
I've been looking for you.
**[05:22] Kaz**
*Oh, no!*
**[05:24] Dark**
You said you had too much to drink yesterday
**[05:26] Dark**
and headed straight home...
**[05:27] Kaz**
N-No need to worry!
**[05:29] Kaz**
*I was trying to turn her down gently.*
**[05:32] Kaz**
* Looks like my intentions didn't*
* get through to her at all!*
**[05:35] Dark**
Shall we continue where our
conversation left off yesterday?
**[05:38] Dark**
Please let me join your party—
**[05:40] Kaz**
I refuse.
**[05:44] Dark**
Such a snap decision!
**[05:46] Kaz**
*Huh? That made her happy?*
**[05:48] Kaz**
*She's dangerous!*
**[05:51] Chris**
That won't do, Darkness.
**[05:53] Chris**
You can't be so pushy.
**[05:55] Kaz**
Um, and you are?
**[05:57] Chris**
I'm Chris, a thief, as you can see.
**[06:01] Chris**
This girl is my friend, I guess?
**[06:03] Kaz**
*Thank goodness.*
**[06:04] Kaz**
* This one seems like a*
* relatively competent person.*
**[06:06] Chris**
You seem to be in need of a useful skill.
**[06:10] Chris**
How about a thief skill?
**[06:12] Kaz**
Huh?
**[06:13] Chris**
It takes very few points to learn,
so it's a good value.
**[06:16] Chris**
I'm sure it would come in handy.
**[06:18] Chris**
How about it?
**[06:19] Chris**
If you act now, I'll do it
for the cost of a drink.
**[06:21] Kaz**
That's cheap!
**[06:22] Kaz**
All right, please do!
**[06:24] Kaz**
Excuse me! One ice-cold drink
for this lady over here!
**[06:30] Chris**
KONOSUBA!
**[06:33] Chris**
So,
**[06:34] Chris**
there are all sorts of thief skills,
like "Enemy Detection" and "Lurk,"
**[06:38] Chris**
but I recommend this one in particular.
**[06:40] Chris**
Here I go. Watch carefully.
**[06:42] Kaz**
Right! I'm ready, Chris-san!
**[06:45] Chris**
Steal!
**[06:56] Kaz**
Hey! My coin pouch!
**[06:59] Chris**
This is the thief skill "Steal."
**[07:01] Chris**
If it's successful, you can take
possession of your opponent's property.
**[07:04] Chris**
So that's how you use it.
**[07:07] ---**
Huh...
**[07:10] Chris**
Hey, want to have a showdown?
**[07:13] Chris**
Learn this thief skill yourself,
**[07:15] Chris**
then steal this pouch back from me.
**[07:17] Dark**
Hey, isn't that overdoing it a bit?
**[07:20] Chris**
He's an adventurer, isn't he?
**[07:22] Chris**
Crossing dangerous bridges
comes with the territory.
**[07:26] Kaz**
*A high tuition fee, huh?*
**[07:29] Kaz**
*Still,*
**[07:30] Kaz**
* this is exactly the sort of exchange between*
* rowdy adventurers that I've been craving!*
**[07:35] Kaz**
*At long last,*
**[07:36] Kaz**
* it's my first adventure-like event*
* since coming to this world!*
**[07:40] Kaz**
Sure!
**[07:41] Chris**
Then it's settled.
**[07:42] Chris**
Use your adventurer card
and acquire the skill.
**[07:46] Chris**
The skills you learned from me
should be displayed there.
**[07:50] Kaz**
Enemy Detection: one point.
**[07:52] Kaz**
Lurk: one point.
**[07:54] Kaz**
Pilfer: one point.
**[07:56] Kaz**
Nature's Beauty...
**[07:57] Kaz**
"Nature's Beauty"?
**[07:59] Dark**
Oh...
**[08:00] Dark**
That's the party trick skill
your ally used earlier.
**[08:05] Kaz**
Five points for a measly party trick?
**[08:07] Kaz**
That's steep!
**[08:08] Kaz**
Yeah, I won't need this.
**[08:31] Chris**
Okay! The thief skills you chose are now yours!
**[08:34] Chris**
Come at me anytime!
**[08:35] Kaz**
All right!
**[08:37] Kaz**
Whatever I steal from you,
don't cry about it!
**[08:40] Chris**
A success will net you this magic dagger.
**[08:42] Chris**
It's a fine item that wouldn't go
for less than 400,000 eris.
**[08:45] Kaz**
Wow!
**[08:46] Chris**
And the consolation prize will be...
**[08:48] Chris**
These rocks!
**[08:50] Kaz**
That's dirty!
**[08:53] Chris**
This will greatly lower the odds
that you'll nab the dagger.
**[08:56] Kaz**
*Damn.*
**[08:57] Kaz**
*This really was enlightening.*
**[08:59] Kaz**
*This isn't Japan.*
**[09:01] Kaz**
*It's survival of the fittest in this world.*
**[09:03] Kaz**
* Any gullible fool who gets*
* tricked has himself to blame.*
**[09:07] Kaz**
I'll do it!
**[09:09] Kaz**
Steal!
**[09:16] Kaz**
All right! Looks like it worked!
**[09:24] Kaz**
What's this?
**[09:27] Kaz**
Oh! This is just as great a success!
**[09:31] Kaz**
I hit the jackpot!
**[09:34] Chris**
No! G-Give me back my panties!
**[09:45] Dark**
Wh-What a savage act.
**[09:48] Dark**
It appears my eyes didn't lead me astray!
**[09:52] Kaz**
KONOSUBA!
**[09:54] Megu**
Oh, Kazuma.
**[09:56] Aqua**
Where have you been?
**[09:57] Aqua**
You missed my dazzling tricks.
**[10:00] Aqua**
Wait, what's with her?
**[10:02] Kaz**
Actually...
**[10:03] Dark**
Indeed.
**[10:04] Dark**
She's just depressed because,
when she taught Kazuma thief skills,
**[10:07] Dark**
her panties were stripped off, then all
the money she had on her was taken.
**[10:12] Kaz**
Hey, what are you blurting out?!
**[10:14] Chris**
He said giving back his coin
pouch wouldn't be enough,
**[10:16] Chris**
so I said I'd pay any price
**[10:18] Chris**
if he'd just return my panties...
**[10:21] Chris**
But then he told me to decide
what they were worth on my own!
**[10:24] Kaz**
Whoa, hold on! Hold on!
**[10:26] Kaz**
You're not wrong, but seriously, hold on!
**[10:28] Chris**
He said if I didn't, they'd be revered
**[10:31] Chris**
within his family as an heirloom from now on!
**[10:34] Kaz**
Hey!
**[10:35] Kaz**
The eyes of every female adventurer
around us are turning stone-cold!
**[10:40] Kaz**
Seriously, wait a second!
**[10:42] Megu**
So, Kazuma, were you able to learn
the thief skills without any trouble?
**[10:48] Kaz**
Well, see for yourself.
**[10:49] Kaz**
Here I go!
**[10:50] Kaz**
Steal!
**[11:05] Kaz**
What's this?
**[11:07] Megu**
What happened?
**[11:08] Megu**
Did your stats go up with your level,
**[11:11] Megu**
allowing you to change jobs
from "adventurer" to "pervert"?
**[11:15] Megu**
Um, it's a bit drafty,
so please give me back my panties.
**[11:19] Aqua**
Kazuma, you...
**[11:21] Kaz**
H-Huh? That's strange.
**[11:22] Kaz**
What you steal should be random...
**[11:24] Dark**
To strip such a young girl of her panties
**[11:27] Dark**
in a public place is truly savage!
**[11:29] Dark**
I can't let this pass!
**[11:32] Dark**
You must let me join your party!
**[11:35] Kaz**
No, thanks.
**[11:40] Kaz**
*This chick is definitely the hopeless type.*
**[11:43] Kaz**
*I can't let any more weirdos into our party.*
**[11:46] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma.
**[11:47] Aqua**
Is this the person you mentioned
**[11:49] Aqua**
who came for an interview while Megumin
and I were in the bath yesterday?
**[11:53] Dark**
KONOSUBA!
**[11:56] Megu**
Hey, this lady is a crusader!
**[11:59] Megu**
We shouldn't have any
reason to turn her down.
**[12:03] Kaz**
*Crap...*
**[12:04] Megu**
Look at this. She's a crusader.
**[12:04] Kaz**
* I really didn't want to*
* let these two meet her.*
**[12:08] Kaz**
*All right, I guess I can play that card.*
**[12:11] Kaz**
Darkness,
**[12:12] Kaz**
there's something I have to tell you.
**[12:16] Kaz**
The thing is...
**[12:18] Kaz**
Aqua and I may not look like much,
**[12:20] Kaz**
but we seriously intend to defeat the Devil King.
**[12:23] Aqua**
Uh-huh.
**[12:24] Chris**
Oh?
**[12:25] Megu**
You do?
**[12:26] Aqua**
Yeah. Awesome, isn't it?
**[12:28] Kaz**
Our adventure is bound to become
more and more rigorous.
**[12:33] Kaz**
For you in particular, Darkness.
**[12:34] Kaz**
If a female knight like you
**[12:36] Kaz**
were to be captured by the
Devil King, it'd be bad news.
**[12:38] Kaz**
You'd be sure to suffer a horrendous fate!
**[12:41] Dark**
Yes, that's exactly right.
**[12:44] Dark**
Since old times,
**[12:45] Dark**
suffering an erotic fate at
the hands of the Devil King
**[12:47] Dark**
has always been the duty and
expectation of a female knight.
**[12:50] Dark**
That alone makes it worthwhile to go!
**[12:52] Kaz**
Wait, what?
**[12:53] Dark**
Huh? What is it?
**[12:54] Dark**
Did I say something strange?
**[12:57] Kaz**
*I-I'll take care of this one later!*
**[13:00] Kaz**
You listen up, too, Megumin.
**[13:02] Kaz**
Our opponent is the Devil King.
**[13:04] Kaz**
We're picking a fight with the
strongest being in this world.
**[13:07] Kaz**
There's no need to force yourself
to stay in a party like—
**[13:11] Megu**
My name is Megumin!
**[13:12] Megu**
I am a user of the finest magic
crimson demons possess,
**[13:15] Megu**
and I command explosion magic!
**[13:17] Megu**
The Devil King fancies himself superior
to us and dares call himself "strongest"!
**[13:21] Megu**
I shall obliterate his vile presence
with our strongest of magics!
**[13:25] Kaz**
*This one's a lost cause, too...*
**[13:26] Kaz**
*What should I do?*
**[13:27] Kaz**
* I made these two embarrassing*
* girls even more motivated.*
**[13:30] Aqua**
Kazuma, Kazuma...
**[13:32] Aqua**
I've kind of gotten cold feet
now that I've heard all this.
**[13:36] Aqua**
Isn't there some easier way?
**[13:38] Kaz**
You should be the most motivated of all.
**[13:40] Kaz**
In fact, this concerns you most of all.
**[13:44] Luna**
Emergency quest! Emergency quest!
**[13:47] Kaz**
What is it this time?
**[13:48] Luna**
All adventurers, please gather
at the front gate at once.
**[13:51] Luna**
I repeat: all adventurers,
**[13:54] Luna**
please gather at the front gate at once!
**[13:59] A**
They're coming!
**[14:00] B**
It can't be! No one told me
it was happening today!
**[14:03] C**
Don't let the children outside!
**[14:04] D**
Oh, no! Oh, no!
**[14:09] AdvA**
You're all ready for this, right?
**[14:11] AdvB**
Better get psyched up!
**[14:21] Kaz**
What is it? What's coming?
**[14:23] Dark**
I'll protect everyone.
**[14:25] Dark**
Kazuma, stay close to me.
**[14:26] Kaz**
What's the emergency quest?
**[14:28] Kaz**
Is it a monster attack?
**[14:30] Aqua**
Didn't they say? It's cabbage. Cabbage!
**[14:33] Kaz**
Huh?
**[14:36] Ruffian**
Looks like it'll be rough this year...
**[14:38] Megu**
A storm is coming.
**[14:42] Adventurers**
Harvest time!
**[14:45] Aqua**
Bring out the mayonnaise!
**[14:54] Kaz**
What the hell is this?!
**[14:58] Cab**
Cabbage, cabbage!
***SIGN*** Compulsory Quest
***SIGN*** Defeat All the Cabbages
Flying into the City
**[15:02] Ruffian**
Go!
**[15:06] Aqua**
In this world, cabbages fly.
**[15:08] Aqua**
When they reach optimal flavor
and harvest season approaches,
**[15:11] Aqua**
they don't just sit back and
let themselves be eaten.
**[15:16] Aqua**
It's said they careen through
the cities and grasslands,
**[15:19] Aqua**
cross the continent and ocean,
**[15:22] Aqua**
and finally quietly pass away
**[15:25] Aqua**
in a secluded region unknown
to man, without being eaten.
**[15:35] Aqua**
If that's the case,
**[15:37] Aqua**
let's catch as many as possible,
**[15:41] Aqua**
and make them into delicious meals to eat!
**[15:44] Luna**
Everyone!
**[15:46] Luna**
The annual cabbage harvesting
season has arrived!
**[15:49] Luna**
This year's cabbages are of fine quality,
**[15:51] Luna**
and will go for 10,000
eris per head harvested!
**[15:54] Luna**
Please capture as many cabbages
as you can and lock them up here!
**[16:00] Kaz**
Can I just go home and go to bed?
**[16:03] Dark**
Kazuma.
**[16:04] Dark**
This is a perfect opportunity.
**[16:06] Dark**
See my ability as a crusader
with your own eyes.
**[16:26] Kaz**
*She's not hitting a single one!*
**[16:38] Dark**
Look out!
**[16:52] Dark**
I'll handle this! Get away while you can!
**[16:55] Kaz**
Darkness!
**[17:03] Dark**
Wh-What?!
**[17:05] Kaz**
Her armor!
**[17:07] E**
I-It's no use!
**[17:09] E**
Run away by yourself!
**[17:11] Dark**
Don't be foolish!
**[17:14] Kaz**
Darkness, you...
**[17:17] Dark**
How could I ever abandon
**[17:20] Dark**
those who have fallen?!
**[17:24] 1**
She's a model knight!
**[17:26] Woman**
Hurry and run away, Lady Knight!
**[17:32] Dark**
*They're watching me...*
**[17:37] Dark**
*These uncultured men*
**[17:39] Dark**
*are looking at my skin and getting aroused!*
**[17:42] Dark**
*How shameful!*
**[17:44] Dark**
*So filthy!*
**[17:46] Dark**
*Incredible!*
**[17:47] Kaz**
*She's enjoying it?!*
**[17:49] Adv**
I can't believe she's going to
such lengths to protect him!
**[17:52] Adv2**
As a knight, I must learn from her example.
**[17:54] Kaz**
*No! You guys have it all wrong!*
**[17:56] Megu**
None can stand in opposition
of my lethal explosion magic.
**[18:03] Kaz**
*She's gonna give people the wrong idea, too!*
**[18:08] Megu**
Could I possibly resist the urge
to unleash explosion magic
**[18:10] Megu**
when faced with such a massive enemy army?
**[18:14] Megu**
No, I can't!
**[18:15] Kaz**
Yes, you can!
**[18:17] Megu**
Oh, blackness shrouded in light...
**[18:19] Megu**
Frenzied blaze clad in night...
**[18:22] Megu**
In the name of the crimson demons,
**[18:23] Megu**
let the collapse of thine origin manifest.
**[18:26] Megu**
Summon before me the root of
thy power hidden within the lands
**[18:30] Megu**
of the kingdom of demise!
**[18:33] Megu**
Explosion!
***SIGN*** Special Bonus
***SIGN*** Abundant Cabbage Harvest
**[19:00] A**
Well, we won't run short on
vegetables for a good while!
**[19:03] Kaz**
*I refuse to accept this.*
**[19:06] Kaz**
*How can a simple cabbage stir-fry be so tasty?*
**[19:11] Kaz**
* I didn't come to a parallel*
* world to fight cabbage.*
**[19:15] Aqua**
I'd expect no less from a crusader.
**[19:17] Aqua**
It's no surprise that
**[19:19] Aqua**
those cabbages had a tough time
breaching your iron-clad defenses.
**[19:22] Dark**
No, I'm just a solidly-built woman.
**[19:26] Dark**
Becoming a wall to protect
someone is all I'm good for.
**[19:29] Megu**
Aqua's Nature's Beauty was splendid, as well.
**[19:32] Megu**
She boosted the morale of all the adventurers,
**[19:35] Megu**
and preserved the freshness of the
harvested cabbage with cold water.
**[19:38] (Flashback) Aqua**
Nature's Beauty!
**[19:40] (Flashback) Aqua**
Nature's Beauty!
**[19:43] (Flashback) Aqua**
It was nothing.
**[19:44] (Flashback) Aqua**
Here!
**[19:44] Aqua**
That's only natural for an arch
priest who heals everyone.
**[19:45] (Flashback) ---**
Here!
**[19:46] (Flashback) ---**
Here!
**[19:47] (Flashback) Man**
Thank you.
**[19:48] Kaz**
Is that important?
**[19:50] Aqua**
An arch priest's magical water is very pure!
**[19:53] ---**
Really?
**[19:53] Dark**
Megumin's magic was astounding, too!
**[19:55] ---**
Really?
**[19:56] Dark**
You blew away the entire swarm
of cabbages in a single blow!
**[19:58] ---**
Really?
**[19:59] Megu**
Have you now seen the power of
the crimson demon bloodline?
**[20:02] Dark**
Impressive.
**[20:02] Dark**
Yes. I've never taken a direct
hit with such firepower before.
**[20:06] Kaz**
Don't let her hit you directly!
**[20:15] Aqua**
Oh, Kazuma!
**[20:16] Aqua**
You weren't half bad yourself!
**[20:19] Megu**
Indeed.
**[20:20] Megu**
When you erase your presence
with the Lurk skill
**[20:22] Megu**
Steal!
**[20:22] Megu**
and attack the enemy from behind with Steal,
**[20:26] Megu**
you look just like a skilled assassin.
**[20:29] Aqua**
Kazuma, by my name,
**[20:31] Aqua**
I hereby confer upon you the title
of "The Great Cabbage Thief."
**[20:35] Kaz**
Oh, shut up!
**[20:36] Kaz**
Jeez, how did things end up like this?
**[20:39] Dark**
Most importantly, you now understand
my abilities as a crusader.
**[20:45] Dark**
So, once more...
**[20:46] Dark**
My name is Darkness.
**[20:48] Dark**
I can use swords with either hand,
**[20:50] Dark**
but don't expect me to be
a powerhouse in battle.
**[20:53] Dark**
I'm far too clumsy, and my attacks
hardly ever hit their mark.
**[20:56] Dark**
However, I'm very good at becoming a wall!
**[20:59] Aqua**
Our party is turning out to have
a pretty impressive roster, huh?
**[21:04] Aqua**
There's me, an arch priest,
**[21:06] Aqua**
Megumin, an arch wizard,
**[21:08] Aqua**
and Darkness, a crusader.
**[21:10] Aqua**
There aren't many parties where three out
of four members are advanced job classes!
**[21:17] Dark**
I'm looking forward to working with you.
**[21:18] Kaz**
* I wouldn't have any real reason to refuse*
* if she were a normal ally, either.*
**[21:19] Megu**
Yes, pleased to have you.
**[21:21] Kaz**
*She's gorgeous, after all. But still...*
**[21:25] Dark**
So, Kazuma, please don't hesitate to use me
**[21:28] Dark**
as a decoy or wall anytime from now on.
**[21:32] Kaz**
*She's one of* those *people...*
**[21:33] Kaz**
*A total masochist.*
**[21:35] Kaz**
* Although this seems like a perfect*
* lineup, it's anything but.*
**[21:38] Kaz**
*I foresee nothing but hardships in our future...*
**[21:42] Dark**
If I should do anything to hold back the party,
**[21:44] Dark**
please reprimand me sternly.
**[21:46] Dark**
You may even abandon me as
a sacrificial pawn if you wish.
**[21:50] Dark**
J-Just imagining it makes me
tremble with excitement!
**[21:56] Dark**
Once again, I'm looking
forward to working with you!
***SIGN*** To my teacher at school. I'm currently learning in a parallel world... The workings of its society, what it is to be human, and what it means to be alive. It makes me grateful that all the wonderful events transpiring here make me grow as a person. I'm so grateful, it makes me tear up. There isn't a single night I haven't soaked my pillow in tears. Uh, I mean that in a good way. A good way, okay?
***SIGN*** Episode 4
***SIGN*** Explosion Magic for This Formidable Enemy!
# E4 - Explosion Magic for This Formidable Enemy!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRK5XW0E6/explosion-magic-for-this-formidable-enemy)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Kaz**
All right...
**[00:12] Kaz**
Create Water!
**[00:28] Kaz**
Well, that's about what I'd
expect from elementary magic.
**[00:32] Kaz**
Now that I've learned a skill,
maybe I'm a bit more of an adventurer.
**[00:35] Dark**
Kazuma!
**[00:36] Dark**
Look!
**[00:37] Dark**
I repaired my armor with the
reward I got for the cabbages,
**[00:40] Dark**
and it's so shiny now! What do you think?
**[00:43] Kaz**
Looks like the sort of armor some
newly-rich aristocrat's son would wear.
**[00:48] Dark**
There are times when I'd like
some genuine praise, too.
**[00:52] Dark**
You never show any mercy, do you, Kazuma?
**[00:56] Kaz**
I don't have time to pay
attention to you right now.
**[00:59] Kaz**
Do something about that pervert who's
well on her way to surpassing you.
**[00:59] Megu**
Irresistible. Irresistible!
**[01:02] Megu**
The luster of this Manatite staff
brimming with magical power...
**[01:08] Aqua**
What was that?!
**[01:09] Aqua**
Hey, you, what's the meaning of this?!
**[01:11] Aqua**
Just how many cabbages do you think I caught?!
**[01:13] Luna**
W-Well...
**[01:15] Aqua**
What?
**[01:16] Luna**
Most of what you caught is actually lettuce...
**[01:20] Aqua**
Why is there lettuce mixed in?!
**[01:23] Luna**
Th-There's nothing I can do about it!
**[01:24] Dark**
It *is* true that lettuce has
a low redemption rate.
**[01:25] Aqua**
I went through a lot of
trouble, so do something!
**[01:27] Kaz**
Is it? I wouldn't know.
**[01:31] Kaz**
*Oh, she's coming this way. This isn't good.*
**[01:34] Aqua**
Kazuma-san!
**[01:37] Aqua**
About how much was your
reward from our last quest?
**[01:41] Kaz**
About a million.
**[01:45] Kaz**
*Yes.*
**[01:46] Kaz**
* Thanks to the quest that was*
* sprung on us out of the blue,*
**[01:49] Kaz**
*I suddenly obtained a small fortune.*
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 4
***SIGN*** "Explosion Magic for This Formidable Enemy!"
**[03:22] All**
A million...
**[03:25] Kaz**
*Many of the cabbages I harvested*
**[03:27] Kaz**
*were apparently packed with lots of XP.*
**[03:30] Kaz**
*I guess high luck makes all the difference.*
**[03:34] Aqua**
K-Kazuma-sama,
**[03:36] Aqua**
I've thought this for quite
some time, but you're, um...
**[03:40] Aqua**
fairly cool, you know?
**[03:43] Kaz**
If nothing praiseworthy about me
comes to mind, don't force it.
**[03:48] Aqua**
K-Kazuma-san!
**[03:50] Aqua**
I thought my reward for this
quest would be pretty hefty,
**[03:53] Aqua**
so I used up all the money I had!
**[03:55] Aqua**
In fact, I expected to
rake in a bunch of money,
**[03:58] Aqua**
so I have a bar tab of nearly 100,000 eris!
**[03:58] Man**
You know what's next.
**[04:01] Kaz**
What do I care?
**[04:02] Kaz**
You're the one who suggested we each
keep our rewards for ourselves!
**[04:05] Aqua**
But that was because I thought
only I'd make a killing off it!
**[04:08] Kaz**
You're real scum.
**[04:09] Aqua**
Please, lend me money!
**[04:11] Aqua**
Just enough to pay my tab is plenty!
**[04:13] Kaz**
Shut up, you useless goddess!
**[04:15] Kaz**
I'm going to use this money to escape
life in the stables once and for all!
**[04:19] Aqua**
Well, you *are* a boy,
**[04:21] Aqua**
and I know you rustle around
beside me at night sometimes,
**[04:24] Aqua**
so I'm sure you'd like a private
room as soon as possible...
**[04:27] Kaz**
Got it! All right, I got it!
**[04:29] Kaz**
I'll lend you the money, so shut up!
**[04:31] Kaz**
KONOSUBA!
**[04:32] Aqua**
Kazuma, allies sure are great!
**[04:35] Aqua**
We're the greatest party ever!
**[04:39] Man**
Oh, thanks for your business.
**[04:40] Kaz**
*Damn her...*
***SIGN*** The Next Day
**[04:50] Megu**
Kazuma looks like a real adventurer now.
**[04:54] Aqua**
Wearing a tracksuit ruins
that fantasy feel, doesn't it?
**[04:57] Dark**
Fantasy feel?
**[04:59] Kaz**
It's elementary, but I did
acquire a magic skill.
**[05:03] Kaz**
I was thinking of going for a
sword mage style, with no shield.
**[05:07] Aqua**
Only the things you say sound mature...
**[05:09] Megu**
Let's go on a kill quest right away, then.
**[05:11] Megu**
One with lots of small-fry monsters!
**[05:15] Megu**
I want to test out my new staff's magic power!
**[05:18] Dark**
No, one with super strong monsters
that hit with a heavy, pleasant blow!
**[05:23] Aqua**
No, let's do a profitable quest!
**[05:26] Aqua**
I paid my tab, so I don't have
enough money for meals today!
**[05:28] Kaz**
*They're not on the same page at all!*
**[05:30] Kaz**
Okay, it's the giant toads' mating season,
**[05:33] Kaz**
and I hear they're infesting
areas near the city...
**[05:36] Aqua**
No frogs!
**[05:36] Megu**
Not the frogs!
**[05:37] Dark**
Why?
**[05:39] Kaz**
Oh, these two have been traumatized by frogs.
**[05:43] Kaz**
They got eaten head-first
and covered in slime.
**[05:48] Dark**
Covered in slime?!
**[05:49] Kaz**
You're turned on right now, aren't you?
**[05:51] Dark**
I am not.
**[05:53] Dark**
KONOSUBA!
**[05:56] Kaz**
Huh? What's going on?
**[05:57] Kaz**
There are hardly any requests.
**[05:59] Dark**
Kazuma! This is it! Let's do this one!
**[06:01] Dark**
A kill quest for a giant
beast called Black Fang!
**[06:04] Kaz**
No! No way!
**[06:06] Kaz**
What's this all about?
**[06:07] Kaz**
There are only high-difficulty quests left!
**[06:11] Luna**
I am very sorry.
**[06:13] Luna**
The truth is, one of the Devil King's top
leaders moved in near town recently.
**[06:18] Kaz**
Huh?
**[06:19] Luna**
All the weak monsters in the area have
gone into hiding because of that,
**[06:23] Luna**
so there's been a sharp decline in requests.
**[06:25] Kaz**
What?
**[06:28] Aqua**
Honestly... I don't care if he's
a top leader or whatever.
**[06:32] Aqua**
If he's an undead, just watch me!
**[06:34] Kaz**
So this means that
**[06:35] Kaz**
until capable adventurers and knights
are sent here from the imperial capital,
**[06:40] Kaz**
we won't be able to find any decent work?
**[06:43] Aqua**
Look, this is incredible! It's such fine work!
**[06:46] Aqua**
I wonder if the sale price will go up.
**[06:49] Kaz**
*A thrilling adventure in a parallel world, huh?*
**[06:58] Kaz**
Say, if you want to do magical training,
can't you go on your own?
**[07:01] Megu**
If I did that, who would carry me home?
**[07:05] Megu**
After one shot, I can't move anymore.
**[07:08] Kaz**
*Is she*
**[07:10] Kaz**
*going to make me tag along for this every day?*
**[07:15] Kaz**
Hey, right here's fine, isn't it?
**[07:17] Kaz**
Just use your magic on
whatever and let's go back.
**[07:19] Megu**
I can't do that!
**[07:20] Megu**
If I don't do it somewhere far from town,
I'll be scolded by the guardsmen again.
**[07:25] Kaz**
You just said "again," didn't you?
**[07:27] Kaz**
Did they get mad and call you a
nuisance because of the noise?
**[07:33] Kaz**
Guess we have no choice...
**[07:36] Megu**
KONOSUBA!
**[07:38] Megu**
Is that an abandoned castle?
**[07:41] Kaz**
It's so eerie.
**[07:43] Megu**
I'll use that!
**[07:44] Megu**
Surely nobody will complain
if I obliterate that!
**[07:48] Kaz**
Uh, yeah...
**[07:50] Megu**
Crimson-black blaze,
king of myriad worlds,
**[07:53] Megu**
though I promulgate the laws of nature,
**[07:55] Megu**
I am the alias of destruction incarnate
**[07:58] Megu**
in accordance with the
principles of all creation.
**[08:00] Megu**
Let the hammer of eternity descend unto me!
**[08:04] Megu**
Explosion!
**[08:18] Megu**
Burn to ashes within the crimson.
**[08:23] Megu**
This is fantastic...
**[08:27] Kaz**
*And that's how*
**[08:29] Kaz**
*my new daily routine with Megumin began.*
**[08:33] Aqua**
It's cheap, dirt cheap! Fresh cabbage!
**[08:36] Kaz**
* Left dead broke, Aqua worked hard*
* at her part-time job every day.*
**[08:36] Aqua**
How about some, ma'am?
And you, too, mister!
**[08:41] Kaz**
* Darkness said she was going to do weight*
* training back at her family home for a while.*
**[08:46] Kaz**
*Megumin, who had nothing in particular to do,*
**[08:48] Kaz**
* commuted to that abandoned castle every day*
* and kept unleashing explosion magic on it.*
**[08:50] Megu**
Explosion!
**[08:55] Kaz**
*On cold, rainy evenings...*
**[08:58] Megu**
—plosion!
**[09:00] Kaz**
* On calm, early afternoons,*
* right after lunch...*
**[09:03] Megu**
—sion!
**[09:06] Kaz**
*On invigorating, early morning walks...*
**[09:06] Both**
Explosion-plosion! Explosion-plosion!
**[09:10] Megu**
—on!
**[09:15] Kaz**
I'd give that one 60 points, I think.
**[09:17] Kaz**
It was lacking in volume.
**[09:21] Megu**
Explosion!
**[09:21] Kaz**
*No matter the occasion,*
**[09:23] Megu**
Explosion...
**[09:23] Kaz**
* Megumin unleashed magic upon that*
* abandoned castle every day.*
**[09:25] Megu**
Explosion!
**[09:29] Kaz**
*I kept close, observing her magic,*
**[09:33] Kaz**
* and eventually came to*
* understand the quality*
**[09:37] Kaz**
*of each day's explosion magic.*
**[09:47] Megu**
Explosion!
**[09:58] Kaz**
It feels pretty good today.
**[09:59] Kaz**
The explosion's shock waves practically
reverberate through my flesh and bones,
**[10:04] Kaz**
and yet the delayed vibrations of
the air seem to stroke my skin.
**[10:09] Kaz**
Nice explosion!
**[10:11] Megu**
Nice explosion!
**[10:13] Megu**
You've come to understand the
path of explosions, Kazuma.
**[10:17] Megu**
How about it?
**[10:18] Megu**
Why not learn explosion magic for real?
**[10:23] Kaz**
It could be fun to acquire it in
the future, if I can afford to.
**[10:27] Megu**
That's a great attitude.
**[10:36] Kaz**
The future, huh?
**[10:38] Aqua**
I'm back!
**[10:40] Aqua**
Take a look at this!
**[10:41] Aqua**
We had some cooking leftover,
so they said I could bring it home.
**[10:44] Aqua**
It's a huge score!
**[10:46] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua, I don't want to say this, but...
**[10:49] Aqua**
What?
**[10:49] Kaz**
To be blunt, I'm starting to think we're
incapable of taking down the Devil King.
**[10:55] Kaz**
Listen.
**[10:56] Kaz**
I never had any amazing powers like
the protagonists in fairy tales do.
**[11:01] Kaz**
Shouldn't some group endowed with
powerful abilities, equipment,
**[11:05] Kaz**
and so forth be sent in to fight
the Devil King's army instead?
**[11:08] Aqua**
Don't say that! I'll never be
able to go home that way!
**[11:11] Kaz**
Save lines like that for after you've
done something a goddess would do,
**[11:16] Kaz**
like guiding the hero or buying
time by sealing the Devil King
**[11:19] Kaz**
until the hero can stand on his own.
**[11:21] Kaz**
You deadbeat who's only
useful for party tricks!
**[11:28] Kaz**
That's the situation, so come up with some
profitable business that's simple to do.
**[11:32] Kaz**
Also, hurry up and teach me recovery magic,
the last thing you've got going for you.
**[11:37] Aqua**
No!
**[11:39] Aqua**
Anything but my recovery magic!
**[11:41] Aqua**
Don't take away my reason for being!
**[11:44] Aqua**
You've got me for that! Isn't that enough?!
**[11:49] Megu**
Your verbal lashings are pretty nasty.
**[11:49] Aqua**
Meanie! Demon! Brute!
**[11:52] Megu**
Most women would cry if you said what
was on your mind without holding back.
**[11:57] Dark**
If you're feeling stressed out,
**[11:59] Dark**
I wouldn't mind if you
verbally abused me instead.
**[12:05] Aqua**
You're so cruel!
**[12:06] Kaz**
*Why you little...*
**[12:09] Luna**
Emergency! Emergency!
**[12:11] Luna**
All adventurers, please arm yourselves at once
**[12:14] Luna**
and gather at the front gate
of the city, ready for battle!
**[12:20] Ruffian**
That's no laughing matter!
**[12:30] Aqua**
What is it?
**[12:31] Kaz**
Hey, what's going on?
**[12:33] Kaz**
He looks crazy strong!
**[12:35] Dul**
I'm the leader from the Devil King's army
**[12:39] Dul**
who moved into a nearby castle recently.
**[12:42] Dark**
Is that a dullahan?
**[12:47] Dul**
Day after day, after day, after day!
**[12:49] Dul**
Wh-Who's the screw-loose imbecile
who keeps firing explosion magic
**[12:53] Dul**
at my castle every single day?!
**[13:01] Kaz**
*One of the Devil King's top leaders*
**[13:03] Kaz**
*was utterly enraged with us.*
**[13:09] Dul**
Day after day, after day, after day!
**[13:12] Dul**
Who's the screw-loose imbecile who keeps
**[13:15] Dul**
firing explosion magic at my castle?!
**[13:22] A**
Explosion magic?
**[13:23] B**
Who comes to mind that
can use explosion magic?
**[13:26] C**
If we're talking explosion magic...
**[13:33] MagicianA**
Huh? M-Me?!
**[13:35] MagicianA**
Why are you looking at me?
**[13:37] MagicianA**
I can't use explosion magic!
**[13:39] A**
Um, I'm still a novice.
**[13:41] A**
Uh, I really didn't do it! Please, believe me!
**[13:44] A**
I don't want to die yet!
**[13:46] A**
I have little brothers to take care of!
**[13:51] Dark**
Megumin?
**[14:05] Dul**
So it was you?
**[14:10] Dul**
You're the imbecile who fired explosion
magic at my castle day after day?!
**[14:15] Dul**
If you're picking a fight with awareness
that I'm a leader in the Devil King's army,
**[14:19] Dul**
come attack my castle fair and square!
**[14:21] Dul**
If you don't have the nerve,
**[14:22] Dul**
then stay in the city, trembling in fear!
**[14:23] Dul**
Tell me, why the underhanded harassment?!
**[14:27] Dul**
Just because we left this city alone since
there's nothing but small fry here,
**[14:30] Dul**
don't get cocky and make my castle go boom,
boom, boom, boom every single day!
**[14:34] Dul**
Are you crazy, you wench?!
**[14:39] Megu**
My name is Megumin!
**[14:41] Megu**
An arch wizard who commands explosion magic!
**[14:47] Dul**
What's "Megumin" supposed to be?
**[14:49] Dul**
Are you making a fool of me?
**[14:50] Megu**
N-No!
**[14:51] Megu**
I am a crimson demon,
the greatest magician in this city.
**[14:56] Megu**
Firing explosion magic at you
continuously was a strategy
**[14:59] Megu**
to lure you, a leader in the
Devil King's army, out here.
**[15:03] Megu**
You fell for it, and came to this city alone.
**[15:06] Megu**
Seems you're out of luck.
**[15:09] Kaz**
When did this turn into a strategy?
**[15:12] Dark**
Not to mention she just proclaimed
herself the greatest magician in this city.
**[15:16] Aqua**
Shh! Do her a favor and keep quiet!
**[15:19] Aqua**
She hasn't used explosion magic yet today,
**[15:22] Aqua**
and she has lots of adventurers behind her,
**[15:24] Aqua**
so she's acting tough.
**[15:25] Aqua**
This is the good part,
so stand here and watch!
**[15:31] Dul**
Very well.
**[15:32] Dul**
It's not as though I came to this
land to meddle with you small fry.
**[15:36] Dul**
I'll likely be staying in that
castle for a while longer,
**[15:40] Dul**
so don't use your explosion
magic on it again. Got it?
**[15:44] Megu**
Impossible.
**[15:45] Megu**
We crimson demons must unleash
explosion magic once a day, or we'll die.
**[15:49] Dul**
H-Hey, I've never heard
anything like that before!
**[15:52] Dul**
Don't make up convenient lies!
**[15:55] Dul**
Are you saying you don't intend to stop
using explosion magic, no matter what?
**[15:59] Megu**
Yes.
**[16:00] Dul**
I may have given myself up to evil,
but I was once a knight.
**[16:05] Dul**
I'm not interested in mowing
down weaklings. However...
**[16:10] Megu**
You can't act so composed for long.
**[16:13] Megu**
Teacher, if you would!
**[16:17] Kaz**
Hey.
**[16:18] Aqua**
Guess I have no choice.
**[16:19] Kaz**
Huh?!
**[16:20] Aqua**
I don't care if you're one
of the Devil King's leaders!
**[16:22] Aqua**
Coming here while I'm around was bad luck!
**[16:25] Aqua**
I can't accept any decent
quests because of you!
**[16:29] Aqua**
Now, are you ready?!
**[16:32] Dul**
What do we have here?
**[16:34] Dul**
An arch priest?
**[16:36] Dul**
I *am* one of the top leaders
in the Devil King's army.
**[16:39] Dul**
I'm not so lowly that I'd be purified
by a low-level priest from this city.
**[16:45] Dul**
I know.
**[16:46] Dul**
Why don't I make that crimson
demon girl suffer a bit?
**[16:54] Aqua**
I'll purify you with my prayer!
**[16:57] Dul**
You're too late!
**[17:00] Dul**
I sentence thee to death.
**[17:02] Dul**
You will die in one week.
**[17:10] Kaz**
Darkness!
**[17:14] Kaz**
*Damn, he got us! A death sentence?*
**[17:17] Megu**
Darkness! Darkness!
**[17:19] Kaz**
Are you all right?
**[17:23] Dark**
It doesn't appear to be serious...
**[17:25] Dul**
It appears this method may actually
be more effective against
**[17:29] Dul**
tightly-knit adventurers such as yourselves.
**[17:32] Dul**
Listen, crimson demon girl.
**[17:34] Dul**
That crusader will die in one week's time.
**[17:38] Dul**
Your precious ally
**[17:40] Dul**
will suffer as she trembles
in terror of death until then.
**[17:44] Dul**
Yes, because of you!
**[17:48] Dul**
Watch as your ally suffers
**[17:50] Dul**
for the next week and
repent for your actions.
**[17:55] Dul**
You should have just done as I said.
**[18:03] Dark**
How terrible...
**[18:04] Dark**
You're basically saying you
cast a death curse on me,
**[18:07] Dark**
and to obey your orders
if we want it removed?
**[18:11] Dark**
Is *that* what you're after?!
**[18:14] Dul**
Huh?
**[18:15] Kaz**
* I don't even want to understand*
* what Darkness is talking about.*
**[18:19] Dark**
I won't give in to a mere curse!
**[18:23] Dark**
I won't give in, but...
**[18:24] Dark**
Wh-What should I do, Kazuma?
**[18:27] Kaz**
Yes, I'm Kazuma.
**[18:27] Dark**
Look at that dullahan's filthy eyes,
hidden beneath his helmet!
**[18:28] Dul**
Huh?
**[18:31] Dark**
Those are the eyes of a degenerate who
plans to take me back to his castle,
**[18:32] Dul**
Huh? What?
**[18:34] Dark**
tell me to shut up and submit to
him if I want the curse removed,
**[18:37] Dark**
and demand I perform hardcore
acts of perversion for him!
**[18:43] Dul**
Huh?
**[18:44] Dark**
You may do as you please with my body,
**[18:47] Dark**
but don't think you'll be free to
do as you please with my heart!
**[18:50] Dark**
A lady knight imprisoned in a castle,
**[18:51] Dark**
having outrageous demands made
of her by the Devil King's minion...
**[18:55] Dark**
Oh, what should I do?!
What should I do, Kazuma?
**[18:58] Kaz**
Yes, yes, I'm Kazuma.
**[18:58] Dark**
This is an unexpectedly moe situation!
**[19:01] Dark**
I don't want to go.
**[19:02] Dark**
I don't want to go, but I have no choice!
**[19:05] Dark**
I'll resist as long as I can,
so don't stand in my way!
**[19:08] Dark**
Okay, I'll be back!
**[19:11] Dul**
What a maniac...
**[19:13] Kaz**
Stop! Don't go!
**[19:14] Kaz**
You're bothering the dullahan!
**[19:16] Dark**
Let go!
**[19:17] Dark**
Don't stop me!
**[19:19] Kaz**
*Pitiful...*
**[19:19] Dark**
Cut it out!
**[19:21] Dark**
KONOSUBA!
**[19:22] Dul**
A-Anyway!
**[19:24] Dul**
Stop firing explosion magic at my castle!
**[19:27] Dul**
And you, crimson demon girl!
**[19:29] Dul**
If you wish to lift the curse on
that crusader, come to my castle.
**[19:34] Dul**
If you're able to make it all the
way to me, I'll lift the curse.
**[19:39] Dul**
However, will you all really
be able to make it that far?
**[20:03] Kaz**
Hey, where do you think you're going?
**[20:06] Megu**
I'm going to go to the castle,
**[20:08] Megu**
nail the dullahan with a direct
hit of my explosion magic,
**[20:11] Megu**
and lift the curse on Darkness.
**[20:19] Kaz**
You know I'm going with you.
**[20:22] Kaz**
If you go alone, you'll use
your magic on some peon,
**[20:24] Kaz**
and then it'll be all over.
**[20:26] Kaz**
Besides,
**[20:27] Kaz**
I'm the fool who went with you every day
**[20:29] Kaz**
and didn't realize the castle belonged
to one of their leaders.
**[20:35] Megu**
Shall we go together, then?
**[20:37] Megu**
However, I hear there's a
bunch of undead in the castle.
**[20:40] Megu**
That means weapons won't work very well.
**[20:43] Megu**
My magic should be more effective.
**[20:46] Megu**
So...
**[20:50] Megu**
Please rely on me at times like these!
**[20:53] Dark**
Don't...
**[20:55] Dark**
Give it up, you two.
Don't do all this for me.
**[20:59] Kaz**
Hey, Darkness! We'll definitely
do something about your curse!
**[21:03] Kaz**
So rest assured—
**[21:04] Aqua**
Sacred Break Spell!
**[21:24] Both**
Huh?
**[21:28] Aqua**
For me, lifting a dullahan's curse is child's play!
**[21:32] Aqua**
Well? I can be priest-like once
in a while, don't you think?
**[21:43] Aqua**
Oh, it was nothing. Actually, maybe it wasn't!
**[21:46] Kaz**
*Megumin and I were so excited.*
**[21:49] Kaz**
*Give us back our motivation...*
**[21:52] Aqua**
Hup!
**[21:53] Aqua**
Nature's Beauty of victory!
***SIGN*** Emergency Quest
***SIGN*** Repel the Dullahan!
***SIGN*** Emergency Quest
***SIGN*** Quest Clear!!
***SIGN*** This is the goddess, Aqua. I'm reporting my progress. We ran into a bit of trouble, but just about everything is going favorably. In fact, it appears as though I've saved the extremely incompetent and reclusive Mr. Satou Kazuma. Mr. Kazuma appears grateful for my devotion from the bottom of his heart. Therefore, I would like to request permission to return home... Huh? I can't? Please, I beg you!
***SIGN*** Episode 5
***SIGN*** A Price for This Cursed Sword!
# E5 - A Price for This Magic Sword!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYVNEPV36/a-price-for-this-cursed-sword)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:11] Kaz**
This money is meaningless.
**[00:14] Kaz**
Feeling satisfied with just a few coins,
**[00:16] Kaz**
taking care of a useless goddess...
**[00:18] Kaz**
This is not the parallel world life I wished for!
**[00:22] Kaz**
Fighting ferocious dragons
with a cursed or holy sword,
**[00:26] Kaz**
being lauded as a chosen hero,
**[00:29] Kaz**
love blossoming with a party member...
**[00:33] Kaz**
Isn't that how it's supposed to be?
**[00:38] Kids**
Red rover, red rover!
**[00:41] Aqua**
I've had all I can take of living in debt!
**[00:45] Aqua**
A quest!
**[00:46] Aqua**
Thanks to that dullahan, there are only
tough ones left, but let's accept one!
**[00:49] Aqua**
I want money!
**[00:52] Dark**
I... I don't mind...
**[00:55] Aqua**
P-Please!
**[00:57] Aqua**
I'm sick of working part-time
in the shopping district!
**[01:00] Aqua**
The manager yells at me if
any croquettes aren't sold!
**[01:02] Aqua**
I'll work hard!
**[01:03] Aqua**
I'll give it everything I've got this time!
**[01:06] Kaz**
*This is one pitiful self-proclaimed goddess.*
**[01:06] Aqua**
Please!
**[01:10] Kaz**
I'm sure I'll run out of money eventually, too,
**[01:12] Kaz**
so go find a decent-looking quest for us.
**[01:15] Aqua**
Got it!
**[01:19] Megu**
Will Aqua be all right?
**[01:21] Megu**
I get the feeling she'll bring
back some insane quest.
**[01:24] Dark**
I'd be okay with an unreasonable quest!
**[01:30] Aqua**
All right.
**[01:31] Kaz**
That's not "all right"!
**[01:33] Kaz**
What are you trying to accept?!
**[01:36] Kaz**
"There's a place where a manticore and
a griffin are fighting over territory.
**[01:41] Kaz**
Please kill both of them.
**[01:43] Kaz**
The reward is 500,000 eris."
**[01:45] Kaz**
Are you stupid?!
**[01:47] Kaz**
*I was right to come check on her.*
**[01:48] Kaz**
* I nearly let her accept a*
* ridiculously high-level quest!*
**[01:52] Aqua**
Hey, check this one out!
**[01:55] Aqua**
"The quality of the town
lake's water has declined,
**[01:58] Aqua**
and Brutal Alligators
have started to live in it,
**[02:00] Aqua**
so I would like to have the water purified.
**[02:02] Aqua**
The monsters will move to a different
habitat if the lake is purified,
**[02:06] Aqua**
so there's no need to kill them.
**[02:08] Aqua**
The reward is 300,000 eris."
**[02:11] Aqua**
This quest is perfect for me!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 5
***SIGN*** "A Price for This Cursed Sword!"
**[03:49] Aqua**
How about it?
**[03:50] Kaz**
Are you actually capable of purifying water?
**[03:52] Aqua**
You fool.
**[03:54] Aqua**
Who do you think I am?
**[03:56] Aqua**
Surely you can tell
**[03:58] Aqua**
what I'm a goddess of from
my name and appearance.
**[04:01] Kaz**
Goddess of party tricks, right?
**[04:03] Aqua**
No, you shut-in NEET!
**[04:04] Aqua**
Water! Do you not see the beautiful
**[04:07] Aqua**
water-colored eyes and hair?!
**[04:09] Kaz**
Go ahead and accept it, then.
**[04:11] Kaz**
If you accept it alone, you can keep
the whole reward for yourself.
**[04:14] Aqua**
Wh-What?
**[04:17] Aqua**
Well, monsters are likely to attack
while I'm purifying the lake...
**[04:21] Aqua**
So I'd like you to protect me...
**[04:24] Kaz**
*That's what this is about?*
**[04:26] Kaz**
How long will it take?
**[04:28] Kaz**
About five minutes?
**[04:32] Aqua**
Half a day or so?
**[04:33] Kaz**
That's long!
**[04:34] Aqua**
Please, I'm begging you!
**[04:36] Aqua**
Help me out, Kazuma-san!
**[04:38] Kaz**
How will you go about purifying it, anyway?
**[04:40] Aqua**
Huh?
**[04:42] Aqua**
Well, for a goddess of my class,
**[04:44] Aqua**
simply touching the lake should purify it.
**[04:48] Kaz**
I see.
**[04:51] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua.
**[04:52] Kaz**
I think I know a way you
can purify the lake safely.
**[04:55] Aqua**
Huh?
**[04:57] Luna**
KONOSUBA!
**[05:05] Aqua**
Hey, are we really doing this?
**[05:07] Kaz**
My strategy is rock-solid.
**[05:10] Kaz**
What're you unsatisfied with?
**[05:13] Aqua**
I feel like some rare,
**[05:16] Aqua**
captured monster that's on its way to be sold.
***SIGN*** Exploration Quest
***SIGN*** Purify the Riverhead Lake
**[05:32] Kaz**
* By no means did we come here to abandon*
* this worthless goddess in the lake.*
**[05:37] Kaz**
*She'll be able to touch and purify*
**[05:39] Kaz**
*the water from inside the safety of the cage.*
**[05:41] Kaz**
Aqua! Tell us if anything happens!
**[05:44] Kaz**
We'll reel you in, cage and all!
**[05:47] Aqua**
I feel like a teabag of black tea
being made into soup stock.
***SIGN*** — 2 Hours In —
**[05:56] Aqua**
312 iron bars,
**[05:59] Aqua**
313 iron bars...
**[06:02] Dark**
No monsters are showing up.
**[06:04] Megu**
Seems that way.
**[06:06] Kaz**
You know, you're being awfully reserved today.
**[06:09] Megu**
Huh?
**[06:11] Kaz**
Normally, you'd say something chuuni-ish
**[06:13] Kaz**
and try to blow the monsters away, lake and all.
**[06:15] Dark**
Oh, that's true.
**[06:16] Megu**
What sort of impression
do you two have of me?!
**[06:21] Megu**
My ultimate explosion magic isn't to be
**[06:23] Megu**
used on the likes of mere alligators.
**[06:26] Kaz**
You always fire it off all over
the place for no reason...
**[06:30] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua!
**[06:32] Kaz**
How's purifying the lake coming along?
**[06:35] Aqua**
It's going well!
**[06:37] Kaz**
You'll catch a chill if you're
in the water too long!
**[06:40] Kaz**
If you need to go to the
bathroom, let us know!
**[06:43] Aqua**
Arch priests don't go to the bathroom!
**[06:46] Megu**
Sounds like she's doing fine.
**[06:48] Megu**
By the way, crimson demons don't
go to the bathroom, either.
**[06:51] Kaz**
Did you used to be idols or something?
**[06:53] Dark**
M-Me, either.
**[06:55] Dark**
I'm a crusader, so I don't...
**[06:59] Dark**
I don't...
**[07:01] Kaz**
Darkness, don't try so hard to deny it.
**[07:05] Kaz**
You two insist you don't use the bathroom,
**[07:07] Kaz**
so next time we'll accept a quest
that'll take longer than a day,
**[07:10] Kaz**
and we'll just see whether you use it or not.
**[07:13] Megu**
Please don't!
**[07:14] Megu**
Crimson demons really don't
use the bathroom, okay?
**[07:17] Megu**
But I'll apologize, so please don't do that.
**[07:19] Dark**
No less from the man I placed my hopes on!
**[07:23] Megu**
Still, the alligators aren't coming.
**[07:25] Megu**
It would be great if this kept up
and things ended peacefully...
**[07:29] Kaz**
Hey, that line is bound to trigger a flag!
**[07:31] Aqua**
K-Kazuma!
**[07:33] Aqua**
Something's coming! Hey, a *lot*
of somethings are coming!
**[07:38] Aqua**
Kazuma! Kazuma-san!
**[07:44] Aqua**
KONOSUBA!
***SIGN*** — 4 Hours In —
**[07:49] Kaz**
*Since the alligators showed up,*
**[07:51] Kaz**
* Aqua's not only using her*
* godly purification ability,*
**[07:53] Kaz**
* but is also using purification magic*
* as if her life depended on it.*
**[07:56] Aqua**
Purification! Purification!
**[07:58] Aqua**
Purification! Purification! Purifica—
**[08:04] Aqua**
Purification!
**[08:05] Aqua**
Purification! Purification!
**[08:07] Aqua**
Purification! Purification!
**[08:10] Aqua**
The cage! The cage is making a strange sound!
**[08:13] Kaz**
Aqua! Let us know if you want to give up!
**[08:16] Kaz**
We'll pull the cage in by
the chain and run away!
**[08:19] Aqua**
No way!
**[08:20] Aqua**
I won't get my reward if I give up now!
**[08:26] Aqua**
It just went "crack"!
**[08:27] Aqua**
The cage just made a sound
no cage should ever make!
**[08:30] Aqua**
Purification! Purification!
**[08:32] Dark**
It looks kind of fun inside that cage.
**[08:37] Kaz**
Don't you dare.
**[08:38] Aqua**
Purification! Purification! Purification!
**[08:41] Aqua**
Purification! Purification!
***SIGN*** — 7 Hours In —
**[08:54] Megu**
It looks like the purification is complete.
**[08:57] Megu**
All of the alligators appear to have left, too.
**[09:00] Kaz**
Aqua, are you okay?
**[09:02] Dark**
Aqua?
**[09:03] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua.
**[09:05] Kaz**
Aqua-san?
**[09:07] Kaz**
Hey.
**[09:08] Kaz**
Hey, I'm talking to you! What's wrong?
**[09:15] Kaz**
If that's enough to make you cry,
you should've retired from the quest.
**[09:19] Kaz**
Come on, we're going home.
**[09:22] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua. We talked it over,
**[09:24] Kaz**
and we don't need any reward for this.
**[09:27] Dark**
That's right, Aqua.
The entire 300,000 eris is yours.
**[09:31] Megu**
Th-That's right! You did all
the work this time, after all!
**[09:36] Kaz**
C-Come on, get out of the cage already.
**[09:39] Kaz**
The alligators are gone.
**[09:41] Aqua**
Just take me back like this.
**[09:43] Kaz**
What did you say?
**[09:45] Aqua**
The world outside this cage is scary.
**[09:48] Aqua**
Take me back to the city like this.
**[09:53] Kaz**
* It looks like this quest*
* traumatized Aqua yet again.*
***SIGN*** Today's Results
***SIGN*** Purify the Riverhead Lake
***SIGN*** Today's Results
***SIGN*** Lake Purification Successful
***SIGN*** Quest Complete
**[10:17] Crem**
That's the legendary Ancient Dragon.
**[10:19] Fio**
Can we beat that thing?
**[10:21] Fio**
Maybe we should run away...
**[10:25] Kyou**
*My name is Mitsurugi Kyouya.*
**[10:27] Kyou**
* I was the sort of ordinary high*
* schooler you could find anywhere,*
**[10:30] Kyou**
* but in the abyss of death,*
* I met a lovely goddess,*
**[10:32] Kyou**
* and was reincarnated into this*
* world as a chosen hero.*
**[10:36] Kyou**
If we let this dragon run rampant,
**[10:38] Kyou**
many people could be injured,
or lose their lives.
**[10:42] Kyou**
We are the only ones who can defeat it!
**[10:47] Both**
Kyouya!
**[10:48] Fio**
The sacred treasure said to be
**[10:50] Fio**
created by the gods,
which only Kyouya can wield...
**[10:53] Crem**
The Cursed Sword, Gram!
**[11:06] Fio**
That's my Kyouya!
**[11:08] Fio**
Only he could defeat the
Ancient Dragon in a single blow!
**[11:11] Crem**
Wh-When did he become yours?!
**[11:14] Kyou**
Hey, now, stop that.
**[11:14] Fio**
Blah!
**[11:15] Crem**
Hey!
**[11:16] Fio**
Kyouya is mine!
**[11:18] Crem**
What are you talking about?
**[11:19] Crem**
Kyouya is mine, okay?!
**[11:20] Kyou**
*I will save this world, without fail.*
**[11:24] Kyou**
*I made a promise to her...*
**[11:28] (Flashback) Aqua**
Now, depart on your journey
with the Cursed Sword, Gram,
**[11:32] (Flashback) Aqua**
chosen hero.
**[11:35] (Flashback) Kyou**
Lady Goddess.
**[11:36] (Flashback) Kyou**
I will slay the Devil King
and save the world for you.
**[11:40] (Flashback) Aqua**
Yes, I expect great things of you.
**[11:48] Aqua**
A used-up goddess is being transported along...
**[11:50] Kyou**
This voice...
**[11:52] Kyou**
I've heard it before!
**[11:54] Crem**
Kyouya? Where are you going?!
**[11:59] Aqua**
I'm sure they're taking me away to be sold...
**[12:11] Kyou**
Lady Goddess!
**[12:17] Aqua**
I'm sure they're taking me away to be sold...
**[12:19] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua,
**[12:21] Kaz**
we're in the city now,
so stop singing that song.
**[12:24] Kaz**
Just transporting a woman on
her knees in a beat-up cage
**[12:27] Aqua**
Hang in there, me...
**[12:28] Kaz**
is already drawing everyone's attention.
**[12:30] Kaz**
In fact, get out of there already!
**[12:33] Aqua**
No.
**[12:34] Aqua**
Inside this cage is my sanctuary.
**[12:37] Aqua**
The outside world is scary,
so I won't come out for a while.
**[12:41] Megu**
She's completely holed herself up in there.
**[12:43] Dark**
Yeah...
**[12:45] Kaz**
She's just like I used to be...
**[12:47] Kaz**
Oh, nothing, never mind.
**[12:49] Kyou**
Lady Goddess!
**[12:50] Kyou**
It's you, isn't it, Lady Goddess?!
**[12:51] Kaz**
Huh?
**[12:55] Megu**
Seriously?
**[12:57] Kyou**
What are you doing in such
a place, Lady Goddess?!
**[13:00] Dark**
Hey.
**[13:01] Dark**
Don't touch my ally so freely.
**[13:04] Dark**
Who are you?
**[13:07] Kaz**
You know him, don't you?
He was calling you a goddess.
**[13:10] Kaz**
Do something!
**[13:12] Aqua**
Goddess?
**[13:13] Kaz**
Yes!
**[13:20] Aqua**
That's right! I'm a goddess!
**[13:22] Kaz**
* She didn't seriously forget*
* she's a goddess, did she?*
**[13:33] Aqua**
So, what business do you have
with a goddess such as myself?
**[13:38] Aqua**
Who are you?
**[13:39] Kyou**
It's me, Mitsurugi Kyouya!
**[13:42] Kyou**
The Mitsurugi Kyouya who received
this Cursed Sword, Gram,
**[13:44] Kyou**
from you and was reincarnated in this world!
**[13:48] Aqua**
Huh?
**[13:48] Kyou**
Huh?
**[13:50] Kaz**
Huh?
**[13:53] Aqua**
Oh, of course! That guy!
**[13:55] Aqua**
Sorry, I totally forgot!
**[13:57] Aqua**
I've sent along many people,
**[13:59] Aqua**
so it's inevitable that I'd forget some!
**[14:01] Kyou**
Y-Yes...
**[14:05] Kyou**
It has been a while, Aqua-sama.
**[14:07] Kyou**
I have been working hard every
day as your chosen hero.
**[14:11] Kyou**
By the way...
**[14:13] Kyou**
Why have you been locked up in a cage?
**[14:17] Kaz**
*Because she didn't want to get out of it.*
**[14:20] Both**
KO-NO-SU-BA!
**[14:23] Kyou**
What?!
**[14:24] Kyou**
You dragged the goddess to this world?
**[14:27] Kyou**
Then you locked her in a cage
and dunked her in a lake?!
**[14:30] Kyou**
What in the world were you thinking?!
**[14:32] Aqua**
W-Wait! I'm having lots of fun every day,
**[14:36] Aqua**
and I'm not upset about having
been dragged here anymore.
**[14:39] Kyou**
Aqua-sama, I don't know
how this man won you over,
**[14:43] Kyou**
but you are a goddess!
And yet, this little...
**[14:47] Kaz**
*This jerk just says whatever he wants.*
**[14:49] Kaz**
*He doesn't even know Aqua all that well!*
**[14:52] A**
What?
**[14:53] B**
Fighting over a woman?
**[14:55] Kyou**
By the way, where are you
staying right now, Aqua-sama?
**[14:58] Aqua**
Um, in the stables...
**[15:01] Kyou**
Huh?
**[15:04] Dark**
Hey, take your hands off him!
**[15:06] Dark**
Is there no limit to your rudeness?!
**[15:09] Megu**
He's kind of making me want to blow him up.
**[15:11] Kaz**
*Don't do that. I'll die, too.*
**[15:13] Kyou**
You two are...
**[15:15] Kyou**
A crusader and arch wizard?
**[15:17] Kyou**
I see. You're blessed with
wonderful party members.
**[15:21] Kyou**
You have such excellent people here,
**[15:24] Kyou**
yet you make Aqua-sama sleep in a stable.
**[15:26] Kyou**
Have you no shame?
**[15:31] Kaz**
*I'm sure this guy has*
**[15:32] Kaz**
* lived a life free of worry*
* with that Cursed Sword Gram*
**[15:35] Kaz**
*that he got as a perk when reincarnating.*
**[15:38] Kaz**
*I worked my way up from square one,*
**[15:41] Kaz**
*so why must I get lectured by a guy like him?*
**[15:44] Kaz**
*Also, these girls are "excellent"?*
**[15:47] Kaz**
*I've*
**[15:49] Kaz**
*never once*
**[15:50] Kaz**
*seen the slightest*
**[15:52] Kaz**
*glimpse of*
**[15:53] Kaz**
*that!*
**[15:55] Kyou**
All of you should travel with me,
a sword master, from now on.
**[15:59] Kyou**
I'll even buy you full sets
of high-grade equipment.
**[16:04] Aqua**
Hey, this is bad.
**[16:06] Aqua**
This guy seriously freaks me out.
**[16:08] Aqua**
He's the narcissistic type, and that scares me.
**[16:11] Dark**
What should I do?
**[16:12] Dark**
My instincts won't let me accept that man.
**[16:15] Dark**
I enjoy getting hit more than attacking,
**[16:17] Dark**
but something about him
makes me want to hit him.
**[16:20] Megu**
Can I blow him up? Can I blow him up?
**[16:22] Kaz**
Um,
**[16:24] Kaz**
it sounds like my allies unanimously
don't want to join your party.
**[16:28] Kaz**
Bye, then.
**[16:33] Kyou**
Wait!
**[16:36] Kaz**
Would you move aside?
**[16:38] Kyou**
Sorry, but I can't leave
Aqua-sama in this environment.
**[16:42] Kaz**
* What now? He's the type*
* that won't listen to anyone.*
**[16:45] Kaz**
*I can see where this is going.*
**[16:48] Kyou**
Will you have a match with me?
**[16:50] Kaz**
*I knew it.*
**[16:51] Kyou**
If I win, turn Aqua-sama over to me.
**[16:54] Kyou**
If you win, I'll listen to any
one request you have.
**[16:57] Kaz**
All right, I'm in. Here I go!
**[16:59] Kyou**
Hey, wait!
**[17:01] Kaz**
Steal!
**[17:14] Kaz**
That'll teach you to say whatever you please.
**[17:16] Fio**
C-Coward!
**[17:19] Fio**
Coward, coward, coward!
**[17:23] Kaz**
Are you two this guy's allies?
**[17:25] Crem**
That's right, you disgusting man! Coward!
**[17:28] Kaz**
*This cheater with a cursed sword*
**[17:30] Kaz**
* who challenged a novice adventurer with*
* weak gear to a match is the real coward!*
**[17:35] Crem**
Give back Gram!
**[17:37] Crem**
Only Kyouya can use that cursed sword!
**[17:39] Kaz**
Huh?
**[17:40] Kaz**
For real?
**[17:42] Aqua**
The Cursed Sword Gram is for
this embarrassing guy's use alone.
**[17:49] Kaz**
Well, I have it now, so I guess I'll keep it.
**[17:51] Fio**
W-Wait just a second!
**[17:53] Crem**
We won't accept the way you won!
**[17:58] Kaz**
I'm an advocate of true gender equality,
**[18:01] Kaz**
a guy who has no problem doling out
a drop kick to a female opponent.
**[18:06] Kaz**
Don't think I'll go easy on you.
**[18:09] Kaz**
I'll unleash my Steal ability
right here in public.
**[18:13] Fio**
Huh?
**[18:14] Crem**
Wh-Wha?
**[18:19] Kaz**
So, what'll it be?
**[18:25] Kaz**
Come on. Come on!
**[18:31] Both**
No!
**[18:36] Dark**
Nice!
**[18:37] Kaz**
Uh, no...
**[18:38] All**
KONOSUBA!
***SIGN*** The Next Day
**[18:42] Aqua**
Why?!
**[18:45] Dark**
That was Aqua's voice.
**[18:47] Megu**
I wonder what happened.
**[18:49] Kaz**
Is she never satisfied until
she's caused a commotion?
**[18:56] Aqua**
She said my reward this time,
**[18:58] Aqua**
after deducting the cost of
the broken cage, is 100,000 eris.
**[19:02] Aqua**
The cage repair fee is 200,000 eris.
**[19:05] Aqua**
I wasn't even the one who broke it...
**[19:08] Aqua**
The next time I see that man,
**[19:10] Aqua**
I'm going to nail him with God Blow for sure!
**[19:13] Kyou**
I've been looking for you, Satou Kazuma!
**[19:18] Kyou**
I heard about you from a certain thief girl.
**[19:22] Kyou**
She said you're a demon
who strips off panties!
**[19:24] Kyou**
What's more, there also seem
to be rumors that you're into
**[19:27] Kyou**
getting girls covered in slime.
**[19:29] Kyou**
They call you "Kazuma the Brute."
**[19:31] Kaz**
Hey, wait! Tell me who's spreading that around!
**[19:33] Kyou**
Aqua-sama,
**[19:35] Kyou**
I swear that I will defeat the Devil King.
**[19:38] Kyou**
So, please, party up with me—
**[19:40] Aqua**
God Blow!
**[19:47] Aqua**
Hey, you!
**[19:49] Aqua**
Pay the repair fee for the cage you broke!
**[19:51] Aqua**
It's 300,000! 300,000!
**[19:53] Kyou**
Oh, uh, sure...
**[19:55] Kaz**
*Didn't she say 200,000 earlier?*
**[19:58] Aqua**
Excuse me!
**[20:00] Aqua**
One drink and a stack of fried frog, please!
**[20:06] Kyou**
I... I realize this request is asking too much...
**[20:11] Kyou**
But, please, could you return
the cursed sword to me?
**[20:14] Kyou**
In exchange, I'll buy you the
finest sword in the shop—
**[20:19] Megu**
First,
**[20:20] Megu**
there's the matter of the cursed sword
no longer being in his possession.
**[20:24] Kyou**
Huh?
**[20:29] Kyou**
S-Satou Kazuma, where's the cursed sword?
**[20:33] Kyou**
Wh-Wh-Where did my cursed sword go?
**[20:36] Kaz**
I sold it.
**[20:38] Kyou**
Damn it!
**[20:41] Crem**
Kyouya!
**[20:46] Kaz**
This money is meaningless.
**[20:48] Dark**
What in the world was with that guy?
**[20:51] Dark**
By the way,
**[20:52] Dark**
he kept calling Aqua a goddess.
What was that about?
**[20:58] Kaz**
*The time is right.*
**[21:00] Kaz**
*It might be okay to tell Megumin and Darkness.*
**[21:04] Aqua**
I've kept this to myself until now,
**[21:06] Aqua**
but I'll tell you.
**[21:09] Aqua**
I am Aqua,
**[21:10] Aqua**
the goddess who rules water,
worshiped by the Religious Order of Axis.
**[21:14] Aqua**
Yes, I am the goddess Aqua!
**[21:17] Both**
Did you dream that?
**[21:19] Aqua**
No!
**[21:20] Luna**
Emergency! Emergency!
**[21:22] Luna**
All adventurers, please arm yourselves at once
**[21:25] Luna**
and gather at the front gate of the city!
**[21:27] Luna**
Adventurer Satou Kazuma-san
and his party in particular,
**[21:30] Luna**
as quickly as possible, please!
**[21:33] All**
Huh?
**[21:44] Kaz**
Him again?
**[21:47] Dul**
All of you...
**[21:50] Dul**
Why haven't you come to the castle?!
**[21:52] Dul**
You wretches!
**[21:58] Kaz**
What?
***SIGN*** Mr. Satou Kazuma is growing noticeably stronger, and is progressing so well, he could defeat the Devil King as soon as tomorrow. This is entirely due to my supervisory talents. Mr. Kazuma, who was once a shut-in NEET, seems to be in constant awe of my shrewd coaching, which is gentle like a mother's, yet strict like a father's. Therefore, I would like to request permission to return home immediately... Huh? I can't? No!
***SIGN*** Episode 6
***SIGN*** A Conclusion to This Worthless Fight!
# E6 - A Conclusion to This Worthless Fight!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRP8X941R/a-conclusion-to-this-worthless-fight)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] Dul**
Why haven't you come to the castle?!
**[00:07] Dul**
You wretches!
**[00:10] Kaz**
What?
**[00:11] Kaz**
Why?
**[00:12] Kaz**
We're not firing explosion
magic at you anymore...
**[00:15] Dul**
Not firing it at me, you say?
**[00:17] Dul**
That's a barefaced lie!
**[00:21] Dul**
That crazy crimson demon girl
**[00:24] Dul**
is still coming to my castle every single day!
**[00:27] Kaz**
Huh?!
**[00:31] Kaz**
You?!
**[00:31] Megu**
Ow!
**[00:33] Megu**
That's not it! Please hear me out!
**[00:36] Megu**
Until now, I've been able to settle for
unleashing my magic on empty plains,
**[00:41] Megu**
but since I learned the allure of using
magic attacks on a castle, well...
**[00:46] Megu**
Now I need something big and
hard, or I just can't endure it.
**[00:50] Kaz**
Don't say that while fidgeting!
**[00:52] Kaz**
Besides, you can't move after
unleashing your magic!
**[00:55] Kaz**
Which means you must've had an accomplice...
**[01:01] Kaz**
You?!
**[01:03] Aqua**
Ow! Ow! Ow!
**[01:04] Aqua**
I can't get any worthwhile quests because of him,
**[01:07] Aqua**
so I wanted revenge!
**[01:11] Dul**
Hear me, fools. My name is Verdia.
**[01:15] Dul**
This isn't the only thing I'm deeply offended by.
**[01:19] Dul**
Did you not have the backbone to
seek retribution for your ally's death?!
**[01:24] Dul**
I may be evil now, but in life,
I strove to be an upstanding knight.
**[01:27] Dul**
In my opinion,
**[01:30] Dul**
allowing the death of that crusader,
a model knight who
**[01:33] Dul**
protected her ally and received
my curse, to go to waste is simply—
**[01:37] Dul**
What?
**[01:42] Dark**
G-Gosh, um...
**[01:45] Dark**
A model knight?
**[01:47] Dul**
H-Huh?
**[01:50] Dul**
What?!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 6
***SIGN*** "A Conclusion to This Worthless Fight!"
**[03:23] Dul**
Huh? You're... alive?
**[03:27] Aqua**
What's this?
**[03:28] Aqua**
Was this dullahan waiting
for us the whole time,
**[03:31] Aqua**
with no idea that we easily dispelled
his curse after he left?
**[03:35] Aqua**
That's hilarious! Super hilarious!
**[03:39] Dul**
I-If I felt like it, I could massacre
every inhabitant of this city!
**[03:40] Aqua**
That's so pathetic!
**[03:45] Aqua**
You're awfully cocky for an undead!
**[03:47] Dul**
Do you think a beginner
adventurer's magic can—
**[03:49] Aqua**
Turn Undead!
**[04:01] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma, this isn't right! It's not working!
**[04:04] Kaz**
No, it looked pretty effective to me.
**[04:06] Kaz**
He went "Gah!" and all.
**[04:09] Dul**
Are you really a beginner?
**[04:14] Dul**
Isn't this city a gathering
place for beginners?
**[04:18] Dul**
F-Fine, then.
**[04:20] Dul**
There's no need for me to fight you myself.
**[04:25] Dul**
Undead Knights!
**[04:27] Dul**
Show this lot a glimpse of Hell!
**[04:30] Kaz**
I bet he's freaked out because your magic
was more effective than he expected.
**[04:35] Dul**
Th-That's not it!
**[04:37] Dul**
Why should the boss be the one you fight first?
**[04:40] Dul**
You start with the small fry—
**[04:41] Aqua**
Sacred Turn Undead!
**[04:48] Dul**
M-My eyes! My eyes!
**[04:50] Aqua**
Wh-What should we do, Kazuma?
**[04:53] Aqua**
My purification magic isn't affecting him at all!
**[04:55] Kaz**
He did go "Yah!" and all.
I think it was very effective.
**[05:02] Ful**
That's enough!
**[05:04] Ful**
Slaughter everyone in the city!
**[05:10] A**
Call a priest!
**[05:11] B**
Someone go to the church and bring
back all the holy water they've got!
**[05:16] Dul**
Now, let me hear your screams of despair!
**[05:24] Kaz**
Hey!
**[05:26] Aqua**
Why are they all targeting me?! I'm a goddess!
**[05:29] Aqua**
I've been a good girl every day, too!
**[05:31] Dark**
No fair!
**[05:33] Dark**
I've been a *really* good
girl every day, so why?!
**[05:37] Kaz**
* Maybe the lost undead are instinctively*
* seeking salvation from a goddess?*
**[05:43] Kaz**
Megumin! Can't you nail that swarm
of undead with explosion magic?
**[05:47] Megu**
But when they're all scattered like that...
**[05:51] Aqua**
Kazuma-san! Kazuma-san!
**[05:59] Kaz**
You idiot! Don't come this way!
**[06:01] Kaz**
If you go the other way,
I'll treat you to dinner tonight!
**[06:04] Aqua**
I'll treat *you* if you do something!
**[06:07] Aqua**
I can't get rid of them, no matter
how many times I use Turn Undead!
**[06:11] Kaz**
*Damn, there are too many of them!*
**[06:14] Kaz**
*Wait a second.*
**[06:15] Kaz**
Megumin, ready your magic and stand by!
**[06:18] Megu**
R-Roger!
**[06:20] Kaz**
Aqua! Follow me!
**[06:23] Aqua**
What for?!
**[06:26] Kaz**
Megumin!
**[06:28] Kaz**
Now!
**[06:30] Megu**
What an ideal situation!
**[06:32] Megu**
I'm grateful! I'm deeply grateful, Kazuma!
**[06:38] Megu**
My name is Megumin!
**[06:41] Megu**
I am a user of the finest magic
crimson demons possess,
**[06:44] Megu**
and I command explosion magic.
**[06:46] Megu**
Behold my power!
**[06:50] Megu**
Explosion!
**[07:07] Megu**
It appears every last person
here has been left speechless
**[07:10] Megu**
after witnessing my explosion magic.
**[07:15] Megu**
That felt amazing...
**[07:20] Kaz**
Need me to carry you?
**[07:22] Megu**
P-Please.
**[07:27] A**
She did it! The crazy crimson demon girl did it!
**[07:30] B**
She's crazy in the head, and so is her name,
but she pulls through when it counts!
**[07:34] C**
I see you in a new light, crazy girl!
**[07:37] Megu**
Grr.
**[07:38] Megu**
I'm sorry.
**[07:39] Megu**
Please remember those people's faces for me.
**[07:42] Megu**
I'll blow them all away later.
**[07:47] Dul**
Amusing...
**[07:52] Dul**
Amusing! Very amusing!
**[07:55] Dul**
I didn't think you'd actually
annihilate my underlings!
**[07:58] Dul**
All right, then, as promised...
**[08:01] Dark**
Kazuma!
**[08:04] Dul**
I shall personally take all of you on!
**[08:08] Kaz**
*Megumin is out of magic power.*
**[08:10] Kaz**
* Aqua's magic isn't enough*
* to deliver a fatal blow.*
**[08:13] Kaz**
*What do we do?*
**[08:14] Se**
No need to fear!
**[08:15] Se**
The city's ace in the hole will be here soon!
**[08:18] He**
Yeah! It doesn't matter if he was a
leader in the Devil King's army or not!
**[08:22] Kaz**
*The city's ace in the hole?*
**[08:24] Ga**
We can create a blind spot
if we all attack at once.
**[08:26] Ga**
Get him, everyone!
**[08:31] Dul**
It appears you wish to die first.
**[08:38] Kaz**
Stop!
**[08:39] Kaz**
Don't go!
**[09:02] Dul**
Who's next?
**[09:04] Mag**
Wh-When Mitsurugi-san gets here,
he'll slay you in a single blow!
**[09:09] Kaz**
*Mitsurugi?*
**[09:11] Kaz**
*Mitsurugi is...*
**[09:16] Kaz**
*The guy whose sword I stole and sold...*
**[09:26] Dul**
Then, until he arrives...
**[09:28] Kaz**
*This is bad. Seriously bad!*
**[09:31] Dul**
Do you think you can hold out?!
**[09:41] Dark**
How dare you?
**[09:43] Dark**
How dare you do that to them?!
**[09:45] Kaz**
Stop, Darkness! Your sword
is no match for him!
**[09:47] Dark**
As one whose calling is to protect others,
**[09:50] Dark**
there are some matters I cannot concede!
**[09:55] Dark**
I-I'm sure
**[09:57] Dark**
you intend to use those strong
arms of yours to lewdly torture
**[10:01] Dark**
and make an example of
me in front of everyone!
**[10:04] Dark**
Try it if you think you can!
**[10:06] Dark**
In fact, show me what you've got!
**[10:08] Dul**
Enough of the weird delusions!
**[10:10] Dul**
They'll get the wrong idea about me!
**[10:13] Dark**
You're on, Verdia!
**[10:16] Dul**
It's inevitable that a holy knight
would be my opponent!
**[10:33] Dul**
Huh?
**[10:36] Kaz**
*Oh, come on, now!*
**[10:37] Kaz**
* You even miss stationary*
* targets? How embarrassing!*
**[10:41] Kaz**
*This girl is my ally!*
**[10:43] Dul**
What a disappointment.
**[10:46] Dul**
That's enough!
**[10:50] Kaz**
Darkness!
**[11:01] Kaz**
Darkness, stand down!
**[11:02] Dark**
A crusader
**[11:04] Dark**
can't stand down when protecting
someone behind them!
**[11:08] Dark**
That is absolute!
**[11:10] Dark**
B-Besides...
**[11:12] Dark**
Besides, this dullahan is the
shrewd man I thought he was!
**[11:16] Kaz**
What?
**[11:18] Dark**
He's been shaving away at my armor
**[11:21] Dark**
a little at a time for a while now.
**[11:23] Dark**
Instead of stripping me nude,
**[11:25] Dark**
he's left only parts of my armor intact,
**[11:27] Dark**
leaving me in an even more provocative state
than nakedness to publicly shame me!
**[11:33] Dul**
Huh?
**[11:34] Dark**
Bring it on!
**[11:35] Dark**
Is this all there is to a shaming
by the Devil King's army?!
**[11:38] Dark**
Hit me some more! Now!
**[11:41] Dul**
Huh?!
**[11:42] Kaz**
At least consider the time and place!
**[11:44] Kaz**
You freaking hardcore pervert!
**[11:46] Dark**
Hardcore pervert?
**[11:50] Dark**
Y-You should consider the time
and place yourself, Kazuma!
**[11:53] Dark**
Taking a beating from a monster in public
is already taking everything I've got...
**[12:00] Dark**
What in the world are you and
this dullahan trying to do to me?!
**[12:05] Dul**
I'm not doing anything!
**[12:06] Kaz**
I'm not doing anything!
**[12:08] Kaz**
Oh, well. You bought me some time.
**[12:12] Kaz**
Create Water!
**[12:20] Dark**
I don't dislike being treated this
way without warning, but...
**[12:25] Dark**
Consider the time and place.
**[12:26] Kaz**
Th-That's not it! This isn't
some weird foreplay!
**[12:29] Kaz**
I'm doing *this*! Freeze!
**[12:33] Dul**
I messed up!
**[12:35] Kaz**
As long as it's harder for you
to dodge, that's enough.
**[12:37] Kaz**
This is what I was really going for!
**[12:39] Kaz**
Steal!
**[12:46] Dul**
That wasn't a bad trick.
**[12:48] Kaz**
Wha—
**[12:49] Dul**
This just shows our difference in level.
**[12:52] Dul**
Now, then, I'll put an end to this farce.
**[12:58] Dark**
Kazuma!
**[13:02] Kaz**
Darkness!
**[13:08] Kaz**
*Remember! Our opponent is a dullahan.*
**[13:10] Kaz**
*What would his weakness have been in an RPG?*
**[13:14] Kaz**
*Watch him closely!*
**[13:16] Kaz**
*How was he able to dodge my water so adeptly?*
**[13:20] Kaz**
*A dullahan's weak point is...*
**[13:21] Kaz**
*An undead monster's weak point is...*
**[13:29] Dul**
As a former knight, I give
my thanks to the Devil King
**[13:33] Dul**
and the false gods for this chance
to have a bout with you.
**[13:36] Dul**
This is farewell, heroic yet foolish crusader!
**[13:41] Kaz**
Create Water!
**[13:45] Dul**
What are you trying to do, boy?!
**[13:48] Kaz**
It's water!
**[13:50] Mag**
Create Water!
**[13:52] Dul**
Stop those attacks!
**[13:54] Mag**
Create Water!
**[13:56] Mag2**
Create Water!
**[14:00] Dul**
C-Curse you all!
**[14:01] Kaz**
Hit him! Hit him! Damn!
**[14:04] Kaz**
I'm going to run out of magic!
**[14:05] Aqua**
Hey, what's all the commotion?
**[14:07] Aqua**
What sort of game are you playing?
**[14:10] Aqua**
Are you an idiot?
**[14:11] Kaz**
*Damn her!*
**[14:13] Kaz**
His weakness is water!
**[14:14] Kaz**
Even a lame goddess like you must
be able to use *one* water spell!
**[14:18] Aqua**
It's about time I punished you,
you insolent jerk!
**[14:21] Aqua**
I can use flood-class water magic.
**[14:23] Kaz**
You can?!
**[14:24] Aqua**
Apologize!
**[14:26] Aqua**
Apologize for calling a water
goddess a "lame goddess"!
**[14:30] Kaz**
I'll apologize all you want later!
**[14:32] Kaz**
Hurry up and do it, you useless goddess!
**[14:35] Aqua**
You just called me a useless goddess!
**[14:37] Aqua**
Just you watch.
**[14:39] Aqua**
I'll show you what a goddess can do!
**[14:43] Aqua**
All my followers in this world,
**[14:46] Aqua**
the water goddess Aqua commands you.
**[14:48] Kaz**
Huh?
**[14:51] Dul**
This is...
**[14:52] Aqua**
Answer my request, my prayer,
**[14:55] Aqua**
and show the world thy power!
**[14:57] Dul**
Oh, no!
**[15:01] Dul**
L-Let go! You perverted knight!
**[15:03] Dark**
How abusive...
**[15:06] Aqua**
Sacred Create Water!
**[15:14] Dul**
It's water!
**[15:17] Kaz**
That's enough! Enough, I said!
**[15:39] Dul**
What are you thinking?
**[15:41] Dul**
Are you an idiot?
**[15:42] Dul**
Are you a complete imbecile?!
**[15:45] Aqua**
Now's your chance, Kazuma!
**[15:47] Kaz**
This time, I'll steal your weapon for sure!
**[15:50] Dul**
I may be weakened,
**[15:52] Dul**
but a beginner adventurer's Steal
**[15:54] Dul**
will never take possession of my weapon!
**[15:58] Dul**
I'll end this once and for all!
**[16:02] Kaz**
Steal!
**[16:12] Dul**
U-Um... Well...
**[16:21] Kaz**
Hey, you guys! Let's play soccer!
**[16:24] Dul**
Soccer?
**[16:25] Kaz**
Soccer is...
**[16:28] Kaz**
A game where you handle the ball
with only your feet, not your hands!
**[16:32] A**
Only your feet?
**[16:33] Dul**
Whoa! Hey, s-stop it!
**[16:36] Dul**
Help, help! Stop! Hey, ow! Stop it!
**[16:41] Dark**
We should be all right,
now that he's so weakened.
**[16:43] Dark**
Give him a proper send-off.
**[16:46] Kaz**
Yeah. Aqua!
**[16:48] Aqua**
Leave it to me!
**[16:49] Kaz**
Do it.
**[16:57] Aqua**
Sacred Turn Undead!
**[17:03] Dul**
Hey, wait!
**[17:27] Megu**
Oh?
**[17:28] Megu**
Darkness, what are you doing?
**[17:32] Dark**
Saying a prayer.
**[17:36] Dark**
Sedol, the huge liar who said
I was brawny in my armor...
**[17:42] Dark**
Heinz, who teased me, saying,
"Fan me with that huge sword of yours!
**[17:45] Dark**
You can hit me with it if you
want, but only if you can!"
**[17:50] Dark**
And Galil,
**[17:51] Dark**
who let me into his party
for only a single day,
**[17:54] Dark**
and screamed at me, saying, "Why are you
charging into the swarm of monsters?"
**[18:00] Dark**
They were all slain by that dullahan.
**[18:04] Dark**
If I could see them once more,
**[18:07] Dark**
I'd love to have a drink with them.
**[18:10] All**
H-Hey...
**[18:15] He**
It actually bothers you that
your sword always misses?
**[18:18] He**
Um, I-I'm sorry.
**[18:21] He**
I'll treat you later.
**[18:23] Dark**
Huh?
**[18:24] Dark**
You're alive?
**[18:29] Aqua**
For someone as great as me,
**[18:30] Aqua**
reviving newly-fallen adventurers
is a piece of cake!
**[18:31] (Flashback) Aqua**
Resurrection! Resurrection!
**[18:33] (Flashback) Aqua**
Resurrection!
**[18:35] Aqua**
Now you can have that drink together!
**[18:38] E**
I see. Darkness-san has a lot
to deal with, doesn't she?
**[18:41] A**
Shh! She'll hear you.
**[18:43] Dark**
I want to die...
**[18:44] Kaz**
Don't hold back.
**[18:46] Kaz**
We'll keep criticizing her like
this for three days or so.
**[18:49] Dark**
Th-This isn't the type of shameful abuse I wanted!
***SIGN*** Emergency Quest
***SIGN*** Emergency Quest
***SIGN*** Kill the Dullahan!
***SIGN*** Quest Clear!!
**[19:01] All**
KO-NO-SU-BA!
***SIGN*** The Next Day
**[19:07] Kaz**
*Things somehow worked out this time,*
**[19:10] Kaz**
* but I think I'll lead a leisurely life,*
* without danger, from now on.*
**[19:15] Megu**
I've been waiting for you, Kazuma!
**[19:17] Megu**
Listen to this!
**[19:18] Megu**
Darkness is being super stingy and
telling me I'm too young to have any!
**[19:22] Dark**
No, wait, that isn't what I...
**[19:24] Aqua**
You're late!
**[19:28] Kaz**
*She's drunk already!*
**[19:30] Luna**
Oh, Kazuma-san, I've been waiting for you.
**[19:33] Luna**
Actually, I have a special
reward for you and your party.
**[19:38] Kaz**
Huh? Really?
**[19:42] Kaz**
Um, why only us?
**[19:44] Ruff**
Who knew you'd defeat a
leader of the Devil King's army?
**[19:47] Ruff**
I believed in the radiance
within you from the very start.
**[19:52] Kaz**
The radiance within me?
**[19:54] Ruff**
A light that shines on the gates of Hell...
**[19:57] Ruff**
There may have been an old legend like that.
**[19:59] B**
That's right! If you weren't here,
**[20:02] B**
we never would have defeated the dullahan!
**[20:04] Adv**
Kazuma! Kazuma!
**[20:07] Adv**
Kazuma! Kazuma!
**[20:10] Adv**
Kazuma! Kazuma!
**[20:11] Kaz**
*I'm not really used to this, but it's pretty nice.*
**[20:15] Luna**
Ahem!
**[20:16] Luna**
In recognition of Satou Kazuma-san's
party's achievement,
**[20:20] Luna**
I award you 300 million eris.
**[20:23] All**
Th-Three hundred million?!
**[20:25] B**
Treat me, Kazuma!
**[20:27] E**
Kazuma-sama, treat me, treat me!
**[20:29] Kaz**
Group meeting!
**[20:31] Kaz**
I have something to tell all of you.
**[20:33] Aqua**
We won thanks to my abilities,
so we should go 90/10.
**[20:36] Kaz**
Now that we've acquired great wealth,
**[20:38] Kaz**
I'm going to live a safe and leisurely life.
**[20:41] Dark**
Wait!
**[20:42] Kaz**
I won't wait!
**[20:43] Dark**
It's a big problem for me if I can't
fight strong enemies anymore!
**[20:45] Kaz**
It's not a problem!
**[20:45] Megu**
It bothers me, too.
**[20:47] Megu**
I'm going to join you, defeat the Devil King,
**[20:50] Megu**
and earn the title of strongest magician.
**[20:52] Kaz**
You won't earn it!
**[20:52] Aqua**
You're going to go back
to being a shut-in NEET?
**[20:54] Kaz**
I'm not going to, because I'm not a NEET!
**[20:56] Aqua**
I won't be able to go home!
**[20:58] Kaz**
I've already made up my mind!
**[20:59] Aqua**
Huh?
**[21:00] Kaz**
Don't "huh" me, you useless goddess!
**[21:00] Luna**
Um, Kazuma-san...
**[21:01] Aqua**
"Useless goddess"—
**[21:04] Aqua**
Is it a check? It's a check, right?
**[21:07] Luna**
Actually,
**[21:09] Luna**
the flood of water Aqua-san summoned
**[21:12] Luna**
caused substantial damage to the outer walls...
**[21:16] Luna**
Of course, defeating a leader of the
Devil King's army is a big accomplishment,
**[21:19] Luna**
so I won't insist you pay back the full sum.
**[21:21] Luna**
I just ask that you pay a portion...
**[21:24] Aqua**
Sneak away...
**[21:24] Kaz**
Wait.
**[21:26] Dark**
The reward is 300 million,
**[21:28] Dark**
and the cost of compensation is 340 million, huh?
**[21:31] Megu**
Our bloody journey of magic
**[21:34] Megu**
has only just begun.
**[21:36] Dark**
Let's go on a quest to take out a
profitable, strong enemy tomorrow.
**[21:39] Aqua**
W-We can split the debt into equal parts...
**[21:44] Kaz**
*Am I going to spend my entire life*
**[21:46] Kaz**
* in this irrational world*
* with these hopeless allies?*
**[21:50] Kaz**
*I gently closed my eyes,*
**[21:52] Kaz**
*and firmly decided I would kill the Devil King,*
**[21:55] Kaz**
* in order to escape from this*
* good-for-nothing world.*
***SIGN*** My name is Megumin. I leave this record to pass down tales of my great exploits to future generations. The mighty magic power of the extraordinary magician Megumin made the Devil King's army tremble in fear. The people she has saved revered her from the bottoms of their hearts, and all the children were entranced by her. There was a flood of fans waiting for her at the guild, enough that she could have handed out numbered tickets. -Written Preface of the Great Magician
***SIGN*** Episode 7
***SIGN*** A Second Death in This Freezing Season!
# E7 - A Second Death in This Freezing Season!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G68VX8EG6/a-second-death-in-this-freezing-season)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:09] Kaz**
Where am I?
**[00:13] Kaz**
Oh, did I die again?
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 7
***SIGN*** "A Second Death in This Freezing Season!"
**[01:53] Kaz**
* After the battle with Verdia,*
* a leader in the Devil King's army,*
**[01:56] Kaz**
*the season turned to winter.*
**[01:58] Kaz**
* That day, I groaned wholeheartedly,*
* as if I were coughing up blood:*
**[02:04] Kaz**
I want money!
**[02:06] Aqua**
Huh? Everyone wants that, obviously!
**[02:10] Aqua**
Anyway, you're entirely too unresourceful.
**[02:12] Aqua**
You make a goddess like myself
sleep in a stable every single night!
**[02:16] Aqua**
Aren't you ashamed of yourself?
**[02:19] Aqua**
If you understand that,
then give me more luxury.
**[02:22] Aqua**
Spoil me more!
**[02:25] Kaz**
Do you not get *why* I want more money?
**[02:29] Aqua**
Huh?
**[02:30] Kaz**
Debt!
**[02:33] Kaz**
Thanks to the debt you've racked up,
**[02:35] Kaz**
most of the reward money we earn
**[02:38] Kaz**
from every quest we do is
deducted to repay those debts!
**[02:41] Kaz**
Just this morning... Just this morning,
**[02:43] Kaz**
when I awoke in the straw of the stable,
my eyelashes were frozen solid!
**[02:48] Kaz**
If I keep sleeping in that stable,
I'm going to freeze to death for sure!
**[02:54] Aqua**
I can't help it!
**[02:56] Aqua**
This city may have perished
in that battle with Verdia,
**[02:59] Aqua**
if not for my super astounding efforts!
**[03:02] Aqua**
You should exalt me more!
**[03:04] Aqua**
All of you should praise me,
praise me, and spoil me rotten!
**[03:07] Kaz**
You attention whore!
**[03:09] Kaz**
If your feats were *that* astounding,
**[03:12] Kaz**
then the rewards, accolades,
*and* debt are all yours!
**[03:16] Kaz**
Pay off your debts on your own.
**[03:19] Aqua**
Wait! I'm sorry!
**[03:21] Aqua**
I apologize for getting carried
away, so don't abandon me!
**[03:25] Dark**
Why all the fuss so early in the morning?
**[03:27] Megu**
Do we have some nice job lined up?
**[03:30] Kaz**
No, we haven't started looking for work yet.
**[03:33] Kaz**
Given the situation and all...
**[03:37] C**
What'll we do today?
**[03:38] D**
I'm sleeping at the inn. It's cold!
**[03:41] Megu**
The reward for fighting off a
leader in the Devil King's army
**[03:44] Megu**
was distributed to every
adventurer who participated.
**[03:48] Megu**
There's no reason for anyone to go
hunting dangerous winter monsters
**[03:51] Megu**
when their coin pouches are full.
**[03:53] Megu**
I gladly welcome it, personally.
**[03:56] Dark**
S-So do I.
**[03:58] Dark**
The stronger the enemy, the better.
**[04:00] All**
KO-NO-SU-BA!
**[04:06] Kaz**
The reward is well and good, but there
seriously aren't any decent quests...
**[04:09] Dark**
Kazuma, Kazuma!
**[04:10] Kaz**
I'm Kazuma.
**[04:11] Dark**
How about this?
**[04:13] Dark**
A kill quest for a pack of White Wolves.
The reward is a million eris!
**[04:17] Dark**
Just imagining a pack of wild
beasts making a mess of me...
**[04:23] Kaz**
Nope.
**[04:24] Megu**
Kazuma, Kazuma!
**[04:25] Kaz**
Yes, I'm Kazuma.
**[04:26] Megu**
How about this?
**[04:28] Megu**
A kill quest for a One-Shot Bear!
**[04:31] Megu**
Now is the time for me to
teach it which of us has
**[04:35] Megu**
the stronger one-shot attack
with my explosion magic!
**[04:38] Kaz**
I want nothing to do with a monster
with such a dangerous-sounding name.
**[04:41] Kaz**
I bet we'd die instantly if it
so much as grazed our necks.
**[04:46] Kaz**
"The mobile fortress 'Destroyer' is approaching,
**[04:49] Kaz**
so we are recruiting scouts to
predict the route it will take."
**[04:52] Kaz**
What is this? What's a "Destroyer"?
**[04:56] Dark**
The Destroyer is the Destroyer.
**[04:58] Dark**
It's a massive fortress
that moves at high speed.
**[05:01] Megu**
It lumbers around, trampling everything.
**[05:04] Megu**
It's oddly popular with children.
**[05:06] Kaz**
I see. I don't get it.
**[05:09] Kaz**
Let's see. What's this?
**[05:13] Kaz**
A Snow Sprite kill quest?
**[05:15] Kaz**
Hey, what are Snow Sprites?
**[05:18] Kaz**
They don't sound all that
strong, based on the name,
**[05:22] Kaz**
but it says the reward is 100,000 eris each.
**[05:24] Megu**
There are lots of Snow
Sprites in the snowy plains.
**[05:27] Megu**
It's said that spring will come half a
day sooner for every one you kill.
**[05:31] Kaz**
Wow.
**[05:31] Megu**
They're very weak monsters,
so they're easily defeated, but...
**[05:34] Aqua**
If we're accepting that
quest, I'll go get ready!
**[05:37] Kaz**
Hey, wait.
**[05:39] Kaz**
You're laughing?
**[05:40] Dark**
Snow Sprites, huh?
**[05:43] Kaz**
* Why does this masochistic crusader,*
* who always wants to fight strong monsters,*
**[05:49] Kaz**
*look so happy?*
**[05:52] Kaz**
*Still, money takes priority right now!*
**[06:00] Kaz**
These are Snow Sprites?
**[06:02] Kaz**
Hey, can't you do something
about that outfit?
**[06:06] Kaz**
You look like some dumb kid going
cicada-catching in the middle of winter.
**[06:09] Aqua**
I can catch Snow Sprites
with this, and bottle them up.
**[06:13] Aqua**
I had the idea that if we mix
them in with our drinks,
**[06:17] Aqua**
we can have ice-cold drinks whenever we want!
**[06:20] Aqua**
Well? Aren't I smart?!
**[06:22] Kaz**
*I can see how this is going to play out...*
**[06:25] Kaz**
Darkness, what happened to your armor?
**[06:27] Kaz**
Are you going to be all right in that gear?
**[06:31] Dark**
No problem.
**[06:33] Dark**
I'm a little cold, but that in itself is...
**[06:39] Kaz**
* I guess a pervert with steamy thoughts*
* has a high body temperature to match.*
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Kill the Snow Sprites!
**[06:53] Kaz**
Number three, wait!
**[06:57] Kaz**
Damn! It's darting all over!
**[07:00] Aqua**
There!
**[07:01] Aqua**
I caught my fourth one! Kazuma, look here!
**[07:05] Aqua**
I caught a bunch!
**[07:08] Kaz**
*If my kill count comes out too low,*
**[07:11] Kaz**
*I'll kill the Snow Sprites she caught, too.*
**[07:15] Kaz**
Now!
**[07:20] Megu**
Kazuma!
**[07:20] Kaz**
What?
**[07:21] Megu**
Can I blow away all the ones in
the area with explosion magic?
**[07:24] Kaz**
All right! Wipe them all out!
**[07:26] Megu**
Roger!
**[07:29] Megu**
By my efflux of deep crimson,
**[07:31] Megu**
topple this white world!
**[07:36] Megu**
Explosion!
**[08:04] Kaz**
Hey, are you all right?
**[08:08] Megu**
I got eight of them.
**[08:10] Megu**
That makes nine defeated Snow Sprites total.
**[08:13] Megu**
I even went up a level.
**[08:16] Kaz**
Oh, nice going!
**[08:17] Kaz**
It would've been a little cooler if you
weren't buried in the snow, though.
**[08:22] Kaz**
*What the heck?*
**[08:23] Kaz**
*Killing Snow Sprites is totally delectable!*
**[08:28] Kaz**
*Why doesn't everybody do this?*
**[08:31] Dark**
There it is!
**[08:32] kaz**
Huh?
**[08:38] Kaz**
Wh-What is that?!
**[08:39] Dark**
So exciting...
**[08:42] Kaz**
*Sh-She's playing dead...*
**[08:44] Aqua**
Kazuma!
**[08:46] Aqua**
I'll tell you why adventurers don't
accept Snow Sprite kill quests.
**[08:51] Kaz**
Huh?
**[08:53] Aqua**
You lived in Japan,
**[08:56] Aqua**
so I'm sure you've at least heard the name
in the news and weather forecasts.
**[08:59] Aqua**
He's the Snow Sprites' master,
**[09:02] Aqua**
and is also said to evoke the image of winter...
**[09:05] Aqua**
Yes,
**[09:07] Aqua**
the Winter Shogun has arrived!
**[09:13] Dark**
Th-The Winter Shogun!
**[09:15] Dark**
One of the specially designated monsters
**[09:18] Dark**
the country has put a huge bounty on!
**[09:20] Kaz**
Huh?!
**[09:22] Dark**
I'm sure this monster plans
to use his position as shogun
**[09:25] Dark**
to have his way with me.
**[09:28] Dark**
I'll resist him,
**[09:30] Dark**
but he will likely be beyond my
capabilities, and I'll be shamed...
**[09:34] Kaz**
Stupid!
**[09:36] Kaz**
Everything in this good-for-nothing world,
the people, the food, and the monsters,
**[09:39] Kaz**
are all absolutely stupid!
**[09:57] Dark**
M-My sword!
**[10:05] Aqua**
Sprites pick up the subconscious
thoughts of the people they encounter
**[10:09] Aqua**
and take their form.
**[10:11] Aqua**
But the only ones strolling
around outside town
**[10:14] Aqua**
in winter are mostly just cheat-users
who came here from Japan.
**[10:18] Kaz**
So this guy was brought to life by some
idiot who came here from Japan,
**[10:21] Kaz**
whose train of thought associated
winter with the Winter Shogun?!
**[10:25] Kaz**
Talk about a pain in the ass!
**[10:29] Kaz**
* When this is over, I'm gonna step on the girl*
* who's been playing dead this whole time.*
**[10:34] Aqua**
Kazuma!
**[10:35] Kaz**
What is it?!
**[10:36] Aqua**
The Winter Shogun is generous.
**[10:38] Aqua**
If we politely apologize, he'll overlook this!
**[10:49] Aqua**
Prostrate yourself!
Prostrate yourself before him!
**[10:51] Aqua**
Come on, everyone, toss your
weapons aside and bow down!
**[10:54] Aqua**
Apologize! You hurry up
and apologize too, Kazuma!
**[10:59] Kaz**
* The former-something-or-other who appears*
* to have abandoned all of her pride*
**[11:03] Kaz**
* prostrated herself quite*
* magnificently, indeed.*
**[11:08] Kaz**
Hey, hurry and bow your head, too!
**[11:11] Dark**
There may be nobody watching,
**[11:12] Dark**
but a knight such as myself would
never bow her head to a monster.
**[11:17] Kaz**
You try to go off with monsters
willingly all the time!
**[11:20] Kaz**
Don't show off your pointless
pride only at times like these!
**[11:24] Dark**
S-Stop it!
**[11:26] Dark**
You're forcing me to bow my
head when I don't want to,
**[11:29] Dark**
and shoving my face into the ground!
**[11:31] Kaz**
Huh?
**[11:33] Dark**
What a reward!
**[11:36] Dark**
The snow is so cold...
**[11:38] Aqua**
Kazuma!
**[11:40] Aqua**
Your weapon, your weapon!
**[11:41] Aqua**
Hurry and throw down the
sword you're holding!
**[11:55] Kaz**
*That's right.*
**[11:56] Kaz**
*I was killed by the Winter Shogun.*
**[12:00] Eris**
Satou Kazuma-san.
**[12:03] Eris**
Welcome to the afterlife.
**[12:06] Eris**
I am Eris, the goddess who will
lead you down a new path.
**[12:12] Eris**
Your life in this world is now over.
**[12:20] Kaz**
*This feels familiar.*
**[12:24] Kaz**
*Is this how it was when I met Aqua, too?*
**[12:29] kaz**
Are you a goddess of this world?
**[12:32] Eris**
Yes. Satou Kazuma-san,
**[12:35] Eris**
you came all the way from
peaceful Japan to this world,
**[12:39] Eris**
only for this to happen to you...
**[12:42] Kaz**
*What's with this goddess?*
**[12:44] Kaz**
*Is she sincerely mourning my death?*
**[12:47] Kaz**
*She's not like that useless goddess!*
**[12:50] Eris**
Brave hero who came from a parallel world...
**[12:52] Kaz**
Y-Yes?
**[12:54] Eris**
With my power,
**[12:56] Eris**
I shall have you reincarnated in
peaceful Japan, to an affluent family,
**[12:59] Eris**
and will make sure you
lead a life of comfort.
**[13:03] Kaz**
Huh? You can do that?
**[13:06] Eris**
If you wish it.
**[13:08] Kaz**
*Seriously?!*
**[13:10] Kaz**
I-If possible, I'd like
**[13:12] Kaz**
above-average parameters in
charm, wisdom, and strength,
**[13:14] Kaz**
and I'd be even happier in a life where
a beautiful girl is my childhood friend!
**[13:18] Eris**
Um, that is more than I can...
**[13:21] Kaz**
Wow, thank goodness!
**[13:23] Kaz**
I thought it was all over,
**[13:25] Kaz**
but now it feels like I pulled
through by the skin of my teeth.
**[13:28] Kaz**
This is a reward for trying my hardest, right?
**[13:32] Kaz**
Because my life up to now had been so awful!
**[13:35] Eris**
Yes.
**[13:36] Eris**
I looked in on your life
from time to time myself.
**[13:40] Eris**
I believe your days were
filled with adversity.
**[13:43] Kaz**
You said it!
**[13:45] Kaz**
I reincarnated thinking I'd get to go on
a thrilling adventure, like in a game.
**[13:50] Kaz**
This is like a misleading promo video, isn't it?
**[13:54] Kaz**
The useless goddess who came
with me as a reincarnation perk
**[13:56] Kaz**
was just an arrogant good-for-nothing.
**[13:59] Kaz**
We recruited allies,
**[14:01] Kaz**
but the only ones who turned up were a crazy
**[14:03] Kaz**
explosion girl who fell flat
every time she used magic,
**[14:05] Kaz**
and a masochistic,
**[14:07] Kaz**
perverted crusader whose attacks always missed.
**[14:10] Kaz**
I was an adventurer,
**[14:12] Kaz**
but I did construction, side jobs,
and was forced into cabbage hunting.
**[14:16] Kaz**
I was in debt deep enough to sell an
organ after defeating a boss enemy.
**[14:21] Kaz**
Sleeping in the stables didn't restore my
strength, it only froze me nearly to death.
**[14:27] Kaz**
Do you know how it feels to have your
eyelashes frozen solid every morning?
**[14:31] Kaz**
The previous world's game balance
was beyond terrible, if you ask me.
**[14:45] Kaz**
H-Huh?
**[14:51] Kaz**
Why?
**[14:53] Eris**
After you've been reborn,
**[14:56] Eris**
may you be blessed once
more with kind encounters.
**[15:06] Kaz**
*I see.*
**[15:08] Kaz**
*It appears*
**[15:10] Kaz**
* I was unexpectedly fond of*
* that good-for-nothing world*
**[15:15] Kaz**
*that I thought I hated...*
**[15:18] Kaz**
* I wanted to adventure with*
* those girls a little longer.*
**[15:24] Aqua**
Now, return to us, Kazuma!
**[15:26] Kaz**
Huh?!
**[15:27] Aqua**
How could you get killed off so easily?
**[15:29] Aqua**
It's too soon for you to die!
**[15:31] Kaz**
Wh-What?!
**[15:32] Eris**
Th-This voice... Aqua-senpai?!
**[15:35] Eris**
Is it really you?!
**[15:36] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma, can you hear me?
**[15:38] Aqua**
I cast recovery magic on your body,
**[15:41] Aqua**
so you can come back to this side now.
**[15:43] Kaz**
Oh, for real?!
**[15:45] Eris**
P-Please wait a moment!
**[15:47] Eris**
You've been reborn once already,
so according to the laws of Heaven,
**[15:50] Eris**
you can't be revived again!
**[15:53] Kaz**
Is that true?
**[15:54] Kaz**
Aqua!
**[15:55] Kaz**
She says that according to the
laws of Heaven or whatever,
**[15:59] Kaz**
I can't be revived again since
I've been reborn once before!
**[16:02] Aqua**
Huh? What goddess is spouting that nonsense?
**[16:06] Aqua**
Hey, you! Identify yourself!
**[16:08] Aqua**
Where does a goddess in charge of a
backwater like this get off talking to me,
**[16:12] Aqua**
an elite in charge of Japan, that way?!
**[16:15] Kaz**
*Hey, knock it off!*
**[16:16] Kaz**
* The face of the goddess in charge*
* of that backwater is twitching now!*
**[16:21] Eris**
Um,
**[16:22] Eris**
she's a goddess called "Eris"...
**[16:24] Aqua**
Eris?!
**[16:26] Aqua**
The overrated Eris who's grown cocky
and even became a unit of currency,
**[16:29] Aqua**
just because she's worshiped a little
in the established religion of this world?
**[16:33] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma!
**[16:34] Kaz**
Yes?
**[16:34] Aqua**
If Eris gives you any more trouble,
**[16:37] Aqua**
I'll confiscate her breast pads—
**[16:38] Eris**
I-I understand!
**[16:39] Kaz**
Pads?
**[16:39] Eris**
An exception! I'll deem this an exception!
**[16:41] Eris**
I'll open the gate right now!
**[16:43] Kaz**
They're pads?
**[16:44] Eris**
My goodness,
**[16:45] Eris**
Aqua-senpai is as unreasonable as ever.
**[16:46] Kaz**
They're really pads?!
**[16:48] Eris**
KONOSUBA!
**[16:49] Kaz**
I don't mind if they're pads.
**[16:53] Eris**
You have now been connected
to the living world.
**[16:55] Eris**
This normally never happens, you know.
**[17:00] Eris**
You are called Kazuma-san, correct?
**[17:02] Kaz**
Huh? Oh, uh, yes!
**[17:09] Eris**
This is our little secret, okay?
**[17:31] Megu**
...zuma! Kazuma, please wake up!
**[17:34] Megu**
Kazuma!
**[17:38] Aqua**
Oh, you're finally awake?
**[17:40] Aqua**
Sheesh, that girl's so hard-headed.
**[17:43] Both**
Kazuma!
**[17:46] Kaz**
*Th-This is kind of extremely embarrassing.*
**[17:50] Aqua**
Hey, come on, Kazuma.
**[17:52] Aqua**
What're you blushing for? Say something!
**[17:57] Aqua**
I brought you back to life, you know.
**[18:00] Aqua**
Don't you have something to say?
**[18:02] Aqua**
Come on.
**[18:04] Kaz**
* I want to trade this useless goddess*
* for that cute goddess from earlier.*
**[18:09] Aqua**
Say something.
**[18:11] Aqua**
Like words of gratitude, or an apology
for how you've treated such a
**[18:14] Aqua**
high-class goddess with such
contempt all this time...
**[18:17] Kaz**
Goddess change!
**[18:19] Aqua**
Fine, you damn NEET!
**[18:22] Aqua**
Why don't I send you to
meet Eris right away, then?!
**[18:27] Dark**
N-Now, now, calm down, Aqua!
**[18:30] Megu**
How do you feel?
**[18:32] Megu**
Do you feel strange in any way?
**[18:35] Kaz**
It looks like I'm all right for now.
**[18:38] Megu**
You are?
**[18:39] Megu**
You were killed in such a
terrible way, after all...
**[18:41] Kaz**
Huh?
**[18:42] Kaz**
H-How was I killed?
**[18:45] Aqua**
You were beheaded by the Winter Shogun.
**[18:48] Aqua**
It was quite a splendid slice.
**[18:51] Kaz**
B-Beheaded?!
**[18:59] Kaz**
*Winter in this world is*
**[19:01] Kaz**
* a season where only those who make*
* it through the struggle for survival,*
**[19:05] Kaz**
*despite the scarce food and harsh environment,*
**[19:07] Kaz**
*are allowed to remain alive and active.*
**[19:10] Kaz**
* There aren't any quests beginners*
* like us can complete easily.*
**[19:16] Kaz**
Okay, retreat!
***SIGN*** Kill The Snow Sprites!
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Retired
**[19:20] All**
KONOSUBA!
**[19:29] Aqua**
Ta-da!
**[19:30] Megu**
A Snow Sprite?
**[19:33] Aqua**
I didn't only prostrate myself.
**[19:36] Aqua**
I pretended to set them all
free, but I saved just one.
**[19:40] Aqua**
I guess even the Winter Shogun couldn't
see through my convincing performance!
**[19:44] Kaz**
Way to go, Aqua!
**[19:46] Kaz**
All right, hand it over and I'll kill it.
**[19:49] Aqua**
What?! No!
**[19:50] Aqua**
I'm going to take this one home
and make it a refrigerator!
**[19:53] Kaz**
The reward for killing those is 100,000 each!
**[19:56] Aqua**
No! Not this one!
**[19:58] Aqua**
I've already given it a name!
**[20:00] Aqua**
I won't let you kill it!
**[20:02] Aqua**
Don't! Don't!
**[20:03] Kaz**
*She's resisting more than I expected.*
**[20:05] Dark**
Let her be, Kazuma.
**[20:08] Kaz**
Oh, fine.
**[20:13] Aqua**
I'll raise it with care,
**[20:15] Aqua**
and when summer comes,
I'll have it make lots of ice.
**[20:18] Aqua**
Then we'll open a snow cone shop!
**[20:20] Aqua**
We'll sleep together on hot, restless nights.
**[20:24] Aqua**
Hey, what does this little one eat?
**[20:26] Megu**
Do Snow Sprites eat anything to begin with?
**[20:29] Dark**
They look so fluffy and soft.
**[20:33] Dark**
I bet if you put some sugar on it and took
a bite, it'd actually be really tasty.
**[20:36] Aqua**
I-I won't let you eat it!
**[20:38] Megu**
Actually, I've worked up an appetite.
**[20:42] Aqua**
Let's order something!
**[20:44] Aqua**
I wonder what I should choose.
**[20:47] Kaz**
*That goddess...*
**[20:50] Kaz**
*She mourned my death so much,*
**[20:53] Kaz**
*and smiled kindly when I was revived.*
**[20:58] (Flashback) Eris**
This is our little secret, okay?
**[21:02] Kaz**
* A righteous, beautiful*
* girl who's not an oddball!*
**[21:06] Kaz**
*Finally, so long after I came to this world, the main heroine has appeared!*
**[21:10] Aqua**
Kazuma, aren't you going to eat?
**[21:12] Kaz**
Huh?
**[21:15] Kaz**
Hey, how much did you guys order?!
**[21:18] Megu**
Once you become as great a magician as I am,
**[21:20] Megu**
you require great sacrifices
in order to function.
**[21:24] Aqua**
What's with you?
**[21:25] Kaz**
What is it?!
**[21:25] Aqua**
I brought you back to life today, Kazuma!
**[21:28] Kaz**
Huh?
**[21:28] Aqua**
There's nothing wrong with a
reward of this size, is there?
**[21:31] Aqua**
I put a little of the reward
from the quest into it, too!
**[21:33] Kaz**
That money was to get us through the winter!
**[21:35] Dark**
What's the problem?
**[21:36] Kaz**
What?!
**[21:37] Dark**
If we run out of money, we can
just accept another quest.
**[21:40] Dark**
What sort of monster would be good next?
**[21:42] Dark**
Maybe one that secretes a lot of slime,
**[21:45] Dark**
or one with repulsive tentacles?
**[21:49] Dark**
Just imagining it makes me
quiver with excitement!
**[21:53] Kaz**
* On second thought, I should've*
* reincarnated in Japan.*
**[21:57] Kaz**
*I made the wrong choice...*
***SIGN*** The magician of extraordinary genius: Megumin. Beneath her charming exterior lay tremendous explosion magic, which was of such splendor, it was even artistic. She brought tears to the eyes of everyone, from children to the elderly, and even to wicked monsters. Spectators rushed in from around to the world to catch a glimpse of her wonderful magic, to the extent it became a subject of public concern. Record of the Great Magician - Chapter 126
***SIGN*** Episode 8
***SIGN*** A Loving Hand for Our Party When We Can't Make It Through Winter!
# E8 - A Loving Hand for Our Party When We Can't Make It Through Winter!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYDQNZP86/a-loving-hand-for-our-party-when-we-cant-make-it-through-winter)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Aqua**
So cold...
**[00:06] Aqua**
I pawned my coat, too. It's so cold...
**[00:12] Aqua**
Th-The fire!
**[00:14] Aqua**
There.
**[00:18] Kaz**
Hey, what are you doing?!
**[00:19] Kaz**
Quit screwing around!
**[00:21] Kaz**
What do you think you're doing
to my only memento of Japan?!
**[00:24] Aqua**
I don't have any choice!
**[00:26] Aqua**
There's nothing else to burn!
**[00:27] Kaz**
Hand over that raiment, then!
**[00:29] Kaz**
It looks like it would burn
better than a tracksuit!
**[00:32] Aqua**
Let go, you shut-in NEET!
**[00:34] Aqua**
Warm me up! Warm me up more!
**[00:44] Aqua**
Whoa, wait!
**[00:54] Kaz**
I can't go on like this.
**[00:57] Kaz**
We have to do something, and fast.
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 8
***SIGN*** "A Loving Hand for Our Party When We Can't Make It Through Winter!"
**[02:33] Kaz**
Our party is poorly balanced.
**[02:36] Kaz**
I'd like a skill that I could use
more like a main weapon.
**[02:36] Aqua**
So cold...
**[02:43] Kaz**
All right, we're here.
**[02:44] Kaz**
Listen, Aqua.
**[02:45] Kaz**
I'll say this while I have the chance.
Don't throw any fits, you hear?
**[02:48] Aqua**
Hey, what're you talking about?
**[02:50] Aqua**
What do you take me for?
**[02:52] Aqua**
I'm no hoodlum or outlaw.
**[02:55] Aqua**
I'm a goddess, a bona fide deity!
**[02:57] Aqua**
Hey! Are you listening to me?
**[02:59] Aqua**
Wait! You should listen gratefully
when a goddess speaks!
**[03:01] Wiz**
Welco—
**[03:06] Aqua**
It's you, you damned undead!
**[03:08] Aqua**
You opened up a shop here?
**[03:10] Aqua**
I'm sleeping in a stable,
**[03:13] Aqua**
and you're running a shop?!
**[03:15] Aqua**
You're pretty full of yourself, for a lich!
**[03:18] Aqua**
I'll burn this shop to the
ground in the name of God—
**[03:20] Aqua**
Ow!
**[03:22] Wiz**
Kazuma-san!
**[03:25] Kaz**
Yo, Wiz. It's been a while.
**[03:27] All**
KONOSUBA!
**[03:31] Aqua**
Do you not even serve tea at this shop?
**[03:33] Wiz**
Oh, I-I'm sorry!
**[03:35] Wiz**
I'll bring some for you right away!
**[03:41] Kaz**
I see she hasn't changed.
**[03:47] Kaz**
*Her name is Wiz.*
**[03:49] Kaz**
* She may look like an ordinary*
* human, but she's actually a lich.*
**[03:52] Kaz**
* She's a ruler of the undead,*
* also known as the "No-Life King."*
**[03:56] Kaz**
*Although Wiz is a lich, she's a kind girl.*
**[03:59] Kaz**
* Every night, she'd send spirits wandering*
* the graveyard home to Heaven.*
**[04:02] Kaz**
*Through various circumstances,*
**[04:04] Kaz**
*we took up that job in her stead*
**[04:07] Kaz**
*and ended up letting her go, but...*
**[04:12] Wiz**
H-Here you go.
**[04:18] Aqua**
It's delicious.
**[04:20] Aqua**
You set up a shop even
though you're an undead,
**[04:22] Aqua**
and you prepare warm tea even
though you're an undead...
**[04:25] Wiz**
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
**[04:27] Wiz**
The likes of me shouldn't live in such luxury!
**[04:29] Kaz**
Stop acting like a spiteful sister-in-law.
**[04:34] Kaz**
Wiz, I have some spare points saved up.
**[04:37] Kaz**
Could you teach me a skill?
**[04:40] Aqua**
Hey! What are you thinking, Kazuma?!
**[04:42] Aqua**
I can't possibly overlook a goddess's
attendant learning a lich's skills!
**[04:46] Kaz**
Who're you calling an attendant?!
**[04:48] Aqua**
Listen. Liches love gloomy, dismal places.
**[04:53] Aqua**
The whole lot of them are
basically related to slugs!
**[04:56] Wiz**
Th-That's terrible!
**[04:58] Kaz**
But people normally can't
learn lich skills, right?
**[05:01] Kaz**
I was thinking it could be
**[05:03] Kaz**
a great asset in battle if
I could learn skills like that.
**[05:06] Wiz**
Um...
**[05:08] Wiz**
Did she say "a goddess's attendant" earlier?
**[05:10] Aqua**
That's right.
**[05:11] Aqua**
I am Aqua.
**[05:13] Aqua**
Yes, the goddess Aqua, worshiped
by the Religious Order of Axis.
**[05:17] Aqua**
Renounce yourself, Lich!
**[05:20] Kaz**
Hey, Wiz. There's no need to get so scared.
**[05:23] Wiz**
No, it's...
**[05:25] Wiz**
There are lots of crazy
people in the Axis sect,
**[05:28] Wiz**
and it's common knowledge that it's
best not to get involved with them,
**[05:32] Wiz**
so when I heard that she's the
head goddess of the Axis sect...
**[05:38] Aqua**
What did you say?!
**[05:39] Aqua**
Curse you! This is what you get!
**[05:40] Wiz**
I'm sorry!
**[05:42] Kaz**
*This conversation isn't going anywhere.*
**[05:44] Aqua**
KONOSUBA!
**[05:51] Wiz**
By the way, I heard you defeated Verdia-san.
**[05:56] Wiz**
His skill with the sword was
supposed to be quite impressive,
**[05:59] Wiz**
even among the other leaders,
**[06:02] Wiz**
so that's quite amazing.
**[06:04] Kaz**
You sound as if you knew Verdia.
**[06:08] Wiz**
Oh,
**[06:09] Wiz**
that's because I'm one of the eight
leaders of the Devil King's army.
**[06:12] Aqua**
Got you!
**[06:15] Wiz**
Wait! Please wait, Aqua-sama!
**[06:18] Wiz**
I beg of you! Please listen
to what I have to say!
**[06:23] Aqua**
I did it, Kazuma!
**[06:24] Aqua**
With this, all my debts will be forgiven!
**[06:26] Aqua**
In fact, I should get change back!
**[06:28] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua, at least hear her out.
**[06:32] Kaz**
Listen, as an adventurer,
I obviously can't overlook you
**[06:35] Kaz**
saying you're a leader of the Devil King's army...
**[06:38] Wiz**
You've got it all wrong!
**[06:39] Wiz**
I was asked to maintain the barrier
that protects the Devil King's castle!
**[06:43] Wiz**
Of course, I've never once
caused anyone any harm,
**[06:46] Wiz**
and you won't receive any
bounty for defeating me, either!
**[06:54] Aqua**
I don't really get it, but I'll
eliminate you, just in case.
**[06:57] Wiz**
Please wait, Aqua-sama!
**[06:59] Aqua-Kaz**
KONOSUBA!
**[07:02] Kaz**
So you're saying
**[07:03] Kaz**
we can open the path to the Devil King's
castle by defeating all of his leaders.
**[07:07] Kaz**
Is that right?
**[07:08] Wiz**
Yes, yes! That's correct!
**[07:11] Wiz**
That's what the Devil King asked of me!
**[07:13] Wiz**
He said he wouldn't stop me from quietly
managing my shop in a human settlement,
**[07:17] Wiz**
but only asked that I maintain
the barrier as one of his leaders.
**[07:20] Aqua**
So, as long as you're around,
**[07:22] Aqua**
humans can't invade the Devil King's castle?
**[07:26] Aqua**
Kazuma, let's eliminate her.
**[07:28] Wiz**
Wait! Please wait!
**[07:30] Wiz**
Please at least let me live a little while longer!
**[07:34] Wiz**
I still have something I need to do.
**[07:38] Aqua**
I could easily break a simple barrier...
**[07:42] Aqua**
But she's a lich, so let's eliminate her.
**[07:44] Wiz**
Please wait!
**[07:45] Kaz**
Now, hang on.
**[07:47] Kaz**
Even if we broke the barrier right now,
**[07:49] Kaz**
we can't defeat the Devil King
at our current levels.
**[07:52] Kaz**
It'll just end in us being beheaded.
**[07:55] Aqua**
Okay, fine.
**[07:56] Wiz**
Th-Thank you very much!
**[07:58] Kaz**
But are you okay with this?
**[07:59] Kaz**
You don't resent us for
defeating Verdia or anything?
**[08:02] Wiz**
It's not as though I was particularly
close to Verdia-san or anything.
**[08:11] Wiz**
Whenever I would walk around...
**[08:12] (Flashback) Dul**
Whoops!
**[08:19] (Flashback) Dul**
My hand slipped!
**[08:23] Wiz**
He was the sort who would often
roll his own head down by my feet
**[08:26] Wiz**
and try to look up my skirt.
**[08:29] (Flashback) Dul**
Strike! In so many ways, a total strike!
**[08:33] Wiz**
Besides,
**[08:35] Wiz**
I believe my heart is human, even now.
**[08:39] Kid**
Here I go! Hi-yah!
**[08:42] Wiz**
Okay, then, I'll teach you one of my skills.
**[08:45] Wiz**
It's the least I can do to repay
you for letting me go before...
**[08:50] Kaz**
What's wrong?
**[08:51] Wiz**
Um...
**[08:52] Wiz**
All of my skills can only be used on an opponent.
**[08:57] Kaz**
Aqua, sorry, but would you do it?
**[09:01] Aqua**
What skill is an undead planning to use on me?
**[09:05] Wiz**
W-Well...
**[09:06] Wiz**
How about "Drain Touch"?
**[09:09] Wiz**
It's a skill that absorbs an
opponent's health and magic,
**[09:11] Wiz**
and can then distribute that power to others.
**[09:14] Kaz**
I see. Depending on how it's used,
**[09:16] Kaz**
it might be able to compensate for
our party's lack of firepower.
**[09:20] Wiz**
O-Of course,
**[09:21] Wiz**
I'll only absorb a very small amount.
**[09:27] Aqua**
Fine. Absorb as much as you can.
**[09:30] Aqua**
Go right ahead.
**[09:33] Kaz**
* It's getting hard to tell which is*
* the lich and which is the goddess.*
**[09:37] Wiz**
O-Okay,
**[09:39] Wiz**
please excuse me.
**[09:44] Wiz**
Huh? H-Huh?
**[09:46] Aqua**
Come on, what's the matter?
**[09:47] Aqua**
Aren't you going to absorb
my magic and health?
**[09:50] Wiz**
H-Huh?!
**[09:52] Aqua**
Ow!
**[09:53] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma, don't interfere!
**[09:55] Aqua**
This is a battle between a lich and a goddess!
**[09:58] Aqua**
You think I'll let her absorb
my strength that easily?!
**[10:00] Kaz**
Look, we're not getting anywhere,
so let her absorb it!
**[10:03] Both**
KONOSUBA!
**[10:06] Kaz**
All right...
**[10:25] Kaz**
Acquisition complete!
**[10:26] Wiz**
U-Um, Aqua-sama?
**[10:29] Wiz**
It's all right. You can let go of my hand now.
**[10:32] Wiz**
Actually, when you touch me,
it sort of makes my hand tingle,
**[10:36] Wiz**
so I'd appreciate it if you would let go.
**[10:40] Wiz**
A-Aqua-sama?
**[10:42] Wiz**
Um, my hand is starting to burn...
**[10:45] Wiz**
Aqua-sama, I'm going to disappear!
I'm going to disappear!
**[10:47] Wiz**
I'm disappearing!
**[10:49] Aqua**
Ow!
**[10:50] Kaz**
What are you taking advantage
of the moment to do?
**[10:53] Wiz**
You're so mean...
**[10:55] Kaz**
* Is it just my imagination,*
* or does Wiz look kind of see-through?*
**[10:59] Cust**
Excuse me!
**[11:02] Cust**
Is Wiz-san here?
**[11:04] Wiz**
KONOSUBA!
**[11:12] Kaz**
This is the place?
**[11:13] Aqua**
Not bad! Yes, not bad at all!
**[11:16] Aqua**
This should be a fitting place for me to live!
**[11:19] Megu**
This was originally some
aristocrat's villa, I hear.
**[11:23] Dark**
But the landlord certainly is generous,
allowing us to live here as
**[11:26] Dark**
a reward if we can exorcise it.
**[11:28] Kaz**
Wiz is apparently known as a
famous magician in our city,
**[11:33] Kaz**
so people often bring cases like these to her.
**[11:36] Aqua**
With this, we can make it through
the winter without worry!
**[11:40] Aqua**
Like they say, "make the
best of a bad situation."
**[11:43] Aqua**
Nothing less from me!
**[11:44] Kaz**
But according to the landlord,
spirits reappear instantly,
**[11:46] Kaz**
no matter how many times they're exorcised.
**[11:49] Aqua**
Leave it to me!
**[11:50] Aqua**
I'm a goddess *and* an arch priest!
**[11:53] Aqua**
You could call me an anti-undead expert!
**[12:01] Aqua**
I see it. I see it!
**[12:03] Aqua**
There was a child born
**[12:05] Aqua**
in this mansion to an aristocrat who made
a move on his maid, partly in fun,
**[12:08] Aqua**
and that illegitimate child was confined here.
**[12:11] Aqua**
The aristocrat had a weak constitution,
and when he died from illness,
**[12:14] Aqua**
the mother of the illegitimate
child went missing, as well.
**[12:17] Aqua**
The girl remained in the
mansion and succumbed
**[12:19] Aqua**
to the same illness as her father,
passing away at a young age,
**[12:22] Aqua**
lonely and alone, without ever
knowing her parents' faces.
**[12:22] Kaz**
I really want to ask how you know
the setting in such detail...
**[12:32] Kaz**
That'll take care of the cleaning for now.
**[12:34] Dark**
We've decided the room arrangements,
and we've carried in our luggage,
**[12:37] Dark**
so all that's left is to wait for nighttime.
**[12:39] Kaz**
No surprise that it's a little dusty... Huh?
**[12:40] Aqua**
The girl's name was Anna Filante Estheroid.
**[12:43] Aqua**
Her favorite things were stuffed dolls
and tales of adventurers' journeys.
**[12:48] Aqua**
But don't worry. This spirit isn't a bad girl.
**[12:51] Aqua**
Whoa!
**[12:52] Aqua**
She may be a child, but she appears to
like things that are a bit grown-up.
**[12:55] Aqua**
She enjoys sweet, hard drinks—
**[12:58] Kaz**
Okay, everyone's free to do
as they please from now on.
**[13:01] Kaz**
Call out as soon as an evil spirit shows up.
**[13:04] Kaz**
Dismissed!
**[13:10] Kaz**
This is great!
**[13:11] Kaz**
Having my own room is a wonderful thing!
**[13:14] Kaz**
* I'm sure the evil spirits*
* will be gone by morning.*
**[13:17] Kaz**
* Knowing Aqua, she isn't the*
* type to let evil spirits*
**[13:21] Kaz**
*do whatever they like in her own house.*
**[13:24] Kaz**
*She is an arch priest and goddess, after all.*
**[13:29] Kaz**
What?!
**[13:32] Kaz**
What's wrong? Hey, Aqua, what happened?!
**[13:33] Kaz**
Are you all right?
**[13:37] Aqua**
Kazuma!
**[13:39] Kaz**
Hey.
**[13:40] Aqua**
This is super expensive alcohol
that I've been saving.
**[13:44] Aqua**
I was looking forward to taking
leisurely sips of it after my bath...
**[13:48] Aqua**
But when I came back to
my room, as you can see,
**[13:52] Aqua**
it was empty!
**[13:53] Kaz**
I see. Goodnight, then. See you tomorrow.
**[13:55] Aqua**
This is the work of evil spirits!
**[13:57] Aqua**
I'm going to go look around the mansion
**[13:59] Aqua**
and strike down any spirits
that catch my eye!
**[14:04] Aqua**
Show yourselves!
**[14:09] Aqua**
Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead!
**[14:12] Aqua**
Turn Undead! Turn Undead!
**[14:14] Aqua**
Nature's Beauty!
**[14:15] Aqua**
Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead!
**[14:29] Kaz**
*I gotta go to the bathroom.*
**[14:36] Kaz**
*Whoa, scary!*
**[14:37] Kaz**
*Huh? Was there a doll like that in this room?*
**[14:40] Kaz**
*It can't be!*
**[14:42] Kaz**
* A clichéd development like*
* this can't be happening!*
**[15:05] Kaz**
Aqua! Aqua-sama!
**[15:08] Kaz**
Scary! Scary! This is super scary! What is this?!
**[15:13] Kaz**
Aqua! Save m—
**[15:22] Kaz**
Don't scare me like that, Megumin!
**[15:23] Kaz**
I nearly wet myself.
**[15:25] Megu**
I'm the one who should be saying that!
**[15:27] Megu**
Why did you come barging into this room?
**[15:30] Megu**
I thought Aqua was coming back.
**[15:33] Kaz**
I could ask you the same.
Why are you in Aqua's room?
**[15:36] Megu**
Well, there were dolls moving
around all over the place...
**[15:40] Megu**
So, um, I was going to have Aqua protect me...
**[15:46] Megu**
and thought we could go
to the bathroom together.
**[15:50] Kaz**
*You, too?*
**[15:52] Kaz**
Aqua's probably still out exorcising
spirits in the mansion, isn't she?
**[15:56] Megu**
Is she? I'm sure Darkness is with her, then.
**[16:01] Kaz**
Yeah, despite how she is, she's a crusader.
**[16:06] Kaz**
Hey, Megumin,
**[16:08] Kaz**
look over there and cover
your ears for a minute.
**[16:11] Kaz**
I'm going to borrow your veranda for a—
**[16:14] Kaz**
Hey, what are you doing?
**[16:15] Kaz**
Let go.
**[16:16] Kaz**
If you don't, my pants and the carpet in
this room are going to be in big trouble.
**[16:20] Megu**
I won't let you.
**[16:22] Megu**
How can you try to relieve yourself alone?
**[16:25] Megu**
Aren't we allies?
**[16:27] Megu**
Wherever we go, bathroom or otherwise,
**[16:30] Megu**
we go together!
**[16:33] Kaz**
Let go!
**[16:34] Kaz**
Don't emphasize our bond as
allies only at times like these!
**[16:36] Kaz**
Didn't you say crimson demons
don't use the bathroom?!
**[16:39] Kaz**
If you want, there's an empty
bottle lying over there!
**[16:42] Megu**
You just blurted out something outrageous!
**[16:43] Kaz**
Now, do it! Give it a try! Go pee!
**[16:45] Megu**
What are you suggesting I
do with that empty bottle?!
**[16:47] Megu**
I won't let you!
**[16:49] Megu**
I can at least shake you from behind
**[16:51] Megu**
while you're taking of your business—
**[17:06] Megu**
KONOSUBA!
**[17:14] Megu**
Kazuma, are you there?
**[17:15] Kaz**
I'm here.
**[17:17] Megu**
Are you really there?
**[17:19] Kaz**
I am here!
**[17:20] Megu**
You're really, really there for me, right?
**[17:23] Kaz**
I'm here!
**[17:24] Kaz**
I'm right here, and I won't
leave you, so hurry up and go!
**[17:28] Megu**
Um, this is a little embarrassing,
**[17:31] Megu**
so could you sing a song or
something in a loud voice?
**[17:34] Kaz**
Why do I have to sing in the middle
of the night, in front of a bathroom?!
**[17:44] Kaz**
Hey, Megumin, hurry up!
**[17:45] Megu**
Please don't rush me like that!
**[17:48] Megu**
I know you're in a tough spot, too!
**[17:50] Kaz**
It's true that both our
bladders are in a tough spot,
**[17:52] Kaz**
but we've got a bigger problem closing in!
**[17:54] Megu**
I can't go if you rush me like that!
**[17:59] Kaz**
It's no good!
**[17:59] Kaz**
I can't wait any longer!
**[18:06] Kaz**
Hurry!
**[18:10] Megu**
How can anyone have so
little common sense?!
**[18:12] Kaz**
You at least got halfway through, so you're fine!
**[18:15] Megu**
What are you talking about?
**[18:16] Megu**
Crimson demons don't use the bathroom.
**[18:19] Kaz**
You're saying that now?!
**[18:20] Kaz**
I'm already at my limit here!
**[18:23] Megu**
I thought that might happen, so I brought this.
**[18:26] Megu**
Please use it.
**[18:27] Kaz**
No, thanks!
**[18:37] Kaz**
I can't hold it anymore.
**[18:39] Kaz**
At this point, I'd sooner use the vase...
**[18:41] Megu**
Darkness blacker than black
and darker than dark,
**[18:45] Megu**
I beseech thee, combine with my deep crimson.
**[18:47] Kaz**
What are you chanting?
**[18:49] Kaz**
You want to blow away this
mansion along with them?!
**[18:56] Kaz**
Damn... We'll just have to go for it!
**[18:58] Kaz**
Megumin, once I open the door, run!
**[19:00] Kaz**
I'll use the Drain Touch skill I just learned
**[19:02] Kaz**
and absorb the magic of as many dolls as I can!
**[19:06] Kaz**
Bring it on, you evil spirits!
**[19:10] Kaz**
I'll sic our mad-dog goddess
on you all later, damn it!
**[19:19] Dark**
H-Hey, Aqua, are you all right?
**[19:22] Dark**
KONOSUBA!
**[19:23] 3**
Yay! Yay!
**[19:25] Luna**
Since you exorcised the evil spirits,
**[19:27] Luna**
you get a special reward.
**[19:29] Luna**
This was posted as a kill quest,
**[19:32] Luna**
but even the guild was bothered
**[19:34] Luna**
by how new evil spirits settled in,
no matter how many were exorcised.
**[19:37] Kaz**
So I hear.
**[19:39] Kaz**
Why did so many evil spirits gather there?
**[19:41] Luna**
About that...
**[19:43] Luna**
There's a community graveyard
near that mansion, correct?
**[19:47] Aqua**
A community graveyard?
**[19:49] Kaz**
The place where we first met Wiz?
**[19:52] Luna**
Someone apparently erected a massive
barrier as a prank or something.
**[19:56] Luna**
So the spirits had nowhere to go
**[19:58] Luna**
and settled in that vacant mansion instead.
**[20:02] Kaz**
Excuse us for a moment.
**[20:07] Kaz**
Hey. You know what's going
on, don't you? Spill it.
**[20:11] Aqua**
Yes.
**[20:12] Aqua**
You remember how we undertook exorcising
the graveyard in Wiz's stead before?
**[20:15] Kaz**
Uh-huh.
**[20:16] Aqua**
But constantly going all the way
to the graveyard was a huge pain.
**[20:19] Kaz**
Uh-huh.
**[20:19] Aqua**
So I figured if I took away their graveyard,
**[20:22] Aqua**
the spirits' home, they would
eventually disperse and leave.
**[20:26] Aqua**
So... I... did.
**[20:29] Kaz**
* Talk about stirring up trouble*
* and taking the credit!*
**[20:31] Kaz**
*This is obviously wrong.*
**[20:34] Kaz**
We won't accept the special
reward from the guild.
**[20:37] Kaz**
Got it?
**[20:39] Aqua**
Yes.
**[20:40] Both**
KONOSUBA!
**[20:44] Kaz**
I thought for sure it was
all Aqua's wild delusions.
**[20:47] Kaz**
Who would've thought it was all true?
**[20:50] Wiz**
Kazuma-san.
**[20:51] Wiz**
Hello. Are you cleaning the gravestone?
**[20:54] Wiz**
Isn't it great that you've
been allowed to live here?
**[20:58] Kaz**
It's a life-saver that the landlord
here is such a nice person.
**[21:01] Kaz**
We caused you a lot of trouble, too, Wiz.
**[21:03] Wiz**
No, no. I personally think
this was for the best.
**[21:08] Wiz**
I'm sure she won't be lonely anymore.
**[21:13] Kaz**
I'm sure.
**[21:14] Kaz**
I'm begging you, please don't
cause any more mischief.
**[21:17] Wiz**
Well, I need to tend to the shop,
so I'll be heading back for the day.
**[21:21] Wiz**
Say hello to the others for me.
**[21:23] Kaz**
Yeah, thanks for coming.
**[21:30] Aqua**
Kazuma! Dinner's ready, so hurry back!
**[21:34] Aqua**
If you don't, your long-awaited
lunch will get cold!
**[21:38] Kaz**
*With this, I finally obtained*
**[21:40] Kaz**
*the down-to-earth lifestyle I most desired.*
**[21:44] Kaz**
Got it. I'm on my way!
**[21:47] Dark**
Aqua, we're out of wood for the fireplace.
**[21:50] Aqua**
Oh, then toss Kazuma's tracksuit
over there onto the fire!
**[21:53] Kaz**
Don't!
**[21:55] Kaz**
I told you, don't try to
burn my precious memories!
***SIGN*** Knight Guidelines and Memorandum, Article 15 A knight must never lose their composure over trivial matters. Having a monster cast its black magic upon you, or being manipulated by obscene mental attacks and exposing your follies to your allies, are disgraceful acts. Also, in the unlikely event you feel sexually stimulated by such a situation, you must never behave as such. Knight or not, it is the lowest of interests you can have as a human being.
***SIGN*** Episode 9
***SIGN*** God's Blessing on This Wonderful Shop!
**[23:30] Dark**
A knight must never lose their
composure over trivial matters.
**[23:34] Dark**
No matter how absurd the situation,
they must never give in.
**[23:37] Dark**
Even when faced with obscene mental attacks—
# E9 - God's Blessing On This Wonderful Shop!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR5VX8W8R/gods-blessing-on-this-wonderful-shop)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:10] Megu**
Darkness! That's not fair!
**[00:16] Megu**
All right, then... Very well, very well.
**[00:19] Megu**
Go ahead and do as you please.
**[00:20] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma.
**[00:21] Aqua**
Relinquish that spot to me,
the exalted Aqua-sama.
**[00:25] Kaz**
Huh?
**[00:26] Aqua**
I'm level 21,
**[00:28] Aqua**
the highest level in the party.
**[00:31] Aqua**
You're being awfully impertinent
for an under-leveled lowbie.
**[00:34] Aqua**
If you get that, then give the spot
nearest the fireplace to your superior.
**[00:40] Kaz**
Huh?
**[00:41] Kaz**
I don't think your stats have risen
at all since I first saw them.
**[00:46] Aqua**
Kazuma, you fool.
**[00:47] Aqua**
My stats were obviously maxed
out from the very start!
**[00:51] Aqua**
You're mistaken to lump me together
with ordinary adventurers.
**[00:55] Megu**
Looks like my only choice now is
to whip out my deadly teleport.
**[00:58] Dark**
H-Hey, Megumin! That's not fair.
**[01:01] Megu**
Those are the rules.
**[01:02] Dark**
Huh?
**[01:03] Megu**
Destroyer, explosion!
**[01:05] Aqua**
Oh, what's this?
**[01:07] Aqua**
You're being very obedient.
**[01:11] Kaz**
*That explains why*
**[01:12] Kaz**
* her intelligence doesn't improve,*
* no matter how much she levels up.*
**[01:17] Aqua**
Hey, wait.
**[01:18] Aqua**
Why are you crying?
**[01:20] Aqua**
What's with that look in your eyes,
like you're staring at someone pitiful?
**[01:24] Kaz**
Goodnight.
**[01:25] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma!
**[01:27] Kaz**
*We acquired a mansion.*
**[01:29] Kaz**
* We resolved the matter of making it through*
* winter, which had been our top concern.*
**[01:34] Kaz**
* But we still have lots of*
* problems left to solve...*
**[01:37] Aqua**
Sheesh! What's your problem?!
**[01:57] Kaz**
Hey, what're you guys doing here?
**[02:01] Keith**
Oh, it's you, Kazuma?
Don't scare me like that.
**[02:05] Kaz**
* These guys are Keith and Dust,*
* two adventurers I got to know recently.*
**[02:09] Kaz**
You're way too jumpy.
**[02:11] Kaz**
Anyway, is there something down this way?
**[02:17] Dust**
This is a secret only for male adventurers.
**[02:21] Kaz**
Okay...
**[02:21] Dust**
Have you heard of a shop
covertly run by succubi
**[02:24] Dust**
that lets you have nice dreams?
**[02:29] Kaz**
Fill me in.
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 9
***SIGN*** "God's Blessing on This Wonderful Shop!"
**[04:18] Kaz**
* I don't think I could have come into*
* a place like this on my own.*
**[04:23] Suc**
Welcome!
**[04:25] Suc**
Please come this way.
**[04:26] Kaz**
Uh, sure.
**[04:28] C**
And his companions, right this way.
**[04:30] Keith**
Y-Yes!
**[04:31] Dust**
Okay...
**[04:34] Suc**
Please wait just a moment.
**[04:45] Kaz**
You're...
**[04:48] Ruff**
Welcome to Hell's door.
**[04:50] Ruff**
Do your best, you daredevil.
**[04:53] Kaz**
S-Sure.
**[04:56] Ruff**
I can hardly wait.
**[04:58] Kaz**
*Occupation... Artisan Weaver?*
**[05:01] Kaz**
*Huh?*
**[05:02] Kaz**
*He wasn't an adventurer?!*
**[05:04] Suc**
Sir?
**[05:06] Suc**
Sir?
**[05:07] Kaz**
Y-Yes?
**[05:09] Suc**
Is this your first time at our shop?
**[05:12] Kaz**
Oh, yes.
**[05:13] Suc**
Well, then, I will explain.
**[05:15] Kaz**
Please do.
**[05:16] Suc**
We succubi have established
**[05:17] Suc**
a mutually beneficial relationship with
the male adventurers of this city.
**[05:21] Kaz**
Yes.
**[05:21] Suc**
Many adventurers live in stables, correct?
**[05:25] Kaz**
Yes.
**[05:25] Suc**
So, I believe males get pent-up in various ways.
**[05:29] Suc**
But they are unable to do
anything about it since
**[05:32] Suc**
there are other adventurers
sleeping all around them.
**[05:35] Kaz**
*I have nothing to feel guilty about, but...*
**[05:38] Kaz**
*Yeah, there's nothing to feel guilty about!*
**[05:41] Suc**
Having said that,
**[05:42] Suc**
if they were to try to make a move on
a female adventurer sleeping nearby,
**[05:45] Suc**
the other adventurers would notice
instantly and beat them into submission.
**[05:50] Suc**
Or it's possible the person
he tried to mess around with
**[05:53] Suc**
could cut his you-know-what
off with a hidden dagger.
**[05:56] Kaz**
*Has that actually happened to anyone?*
**[06:00] Suc**
And so,
**[06:01] Suc**
we succubi give male adventurers
dreams that bring them relief.
**[06:06] Suc**
We do end up taking a bit of your vitality,
**[06:09] Suc**
but we do so in moderation
**[06:11] Suc**
to ensure it won't affect
your adventures or daily life.
**[06:15] Kaz**
*Wonderful! Beyond wonderful!*
**[06:19] Kaz**
* If everyone could be in a*
* constant state of afterglow,*
**[06:21] Kaz**
*there would be no war!*
**[06:23] Suc**
Please write your order for your desired dream
**[06:26] Suc**
on this questionnaire sheet.
**[06:29] Kaz**
Um, there are entries for
**[06:31] Kaz**
the customer's condition, gender,
and appearance in the dream...
**[06:35] Kaz**
Uh, what are these?
**[06:37] Suc**
Those are for requests such as
"I want to be a king or hero."
**[06:41] Suc**
We have customers who want to try
it from a female perspective, too.
**[06:45] Kaz**
Really?
**[06:48] Suc**
There are also those who
wish to return to boyhood
**[06:51] Suc**
and get pushed down by
strong female adventurers.
**[06:57] Kaz**
*Are the men in this city all right?*
**[07:01] Kaz**
Oh, what about this "partner preferences"?
**[07:04] Kaz**
How much can you actually configure?
**[07:06] Suc**
Their personality, speech patterns,
**[07:08] Suc**
appearance, and even how much they like you.
**[07:10] Suc**
It can be anything or anyone,
**[07:12] Suc**
whether they exist in real life or not.
**[07:14] Kaz**
For real?!
**[07:16] Suc**
For real.
**[07:17] Kaz**
So a specific famous girl,
a girl who's close to me,
**[07:20] Kaz**
or even a 2D waifu would be possible?
**[07:22] Suc**
Yes, though I don't know what a "2D waifu" is.
**[07:27] Kaz**
Would the rights to one's likeness
and so forth cause problems?
**[07:31] Suc**
They wouldn't. It's a dream, after all.
**[07:34] Kaz**
That's true!
**[07:36] Kaz**
Would that mean there's no restriction
on your partner's age, either?
**[07:41] Kaz**
Oh, not that I intend to ask for that sort of thing.
**[07:43] Kaz**
I just... How should I put it...
**[07:45] Suc**
There is not.
**[07:46] Suc**
Please choose whatever you like.
**[07:48] Kaz**
I-Is that okay?
**[07:51] Kaz**
In terms of, you know, regulations and stuff?
**[07:54] Suc**
It's all right. It is a dream, after all.
**[07:57] Kaz**
That's true!
**[07:59] Kaz**
*Yeah, there's no problem if it's in a dream!*
**[08:02] Kaz**
*I can't believe this!*
**[08:03] Kaz**
* Succubi erotic dream*
* services are the greatest!*
**[08:07] Suc**
Oh, also, please be careful not to
drink too much this evening, okay?
**[08:10] Suc**
If you sleep too soundly,
we can't show you any dreams.
**[08:14] Kaz**
All right, understood!
**[08:16] All**
KO-NOSUBA!
**[08:19] Kaz**
I'm back.
**[08:26] Aqua**
Be glad, Kazuma!
Tonight's dinner is incredible!
**[08:30] Aqua**
It's crab! Crab!
**[08:32] Dark**
My family sent them to
congratulate us on moving in.
**[08:36] Aqua**
It's super high-grade marbled red crab,
**[08:38] Aqua**
and it even came with this
amazing, top-quality liquor!
**[08:41] Aqua**
They said it's to thank
**[08:42] Aqua**
their daughter's party members
for always looking out for her!
**[08:46] Megu**
I can hardly believe I'm laying
my eyes on marbled red crab!
**[08:49] Megu**
I've never been more glad that
I joined this party than I am today.
**[08:53] Kaz**
Is it that luxurious?
**[08:55] Megu**
Of course!
**[08:56] Megu**
If you told me I could eat this crab
**[08:58] Megu**
in exchange for holding off on
using explosion magic for the day,
**[09:00] Megu**
I would restrain myself with pleasure,
**[09:02] Megu**
and unleash my explosion
magic after I've eaten!
**[09:05] Megu**
That's how luxurious it is!
**[09:08] Kaz**
Wow, that's aweso— Huh?
**[09:10] Kaz**
What did you say at the end there?
**[09:27] Kaz**
*Gulp.*
**[09:37] Kaz**
*Oh, no!*
**[09:38] Kaz**
*I can't stop myself!*
**[09:42] Kaz**
*Crack!*
**[09:44] Kaz**
*Crack!*
**[09:46] Kaz**
*Crack!*
**[09:50] Aqua**
Kazuma, Kazuma!
**[09:51] Aqua**
Give me a little fire.
**[09:53] Aqua**
I'll teach you a tasty way to drink this.
**[09:57] Kaz**
Here. Tinder!
**[10:00] Aqua**
Just place a shell filled with
crab innards here, and...
**[10:09] Aqua**
It should be ready.
**[10:17] 3**
*Gulp.*
**[10:19] Kaz**
M-Me, too!
**[10:23] Kaz**
*This is a trap!*
**[10:25] Kaz**
*That succubus lady told me, didn't she?*
**[10:25] Dark**
That's a clever idea.
**[10:27] Kaz**
* If I drink too much and sleep soundly,*
* I won't be able to dream!*
**[10:27] Aqua**
Isn't it? Nothing less from me!
**[10:30] Megu**
Yeah!
**[10:31] Megu**
Aqua, Aqua, what does it taste like?
**[10:31] Dark**
Not going to drink? I'll go first, then.
**[10:34] Kaz**
* Calm down. I'm a man who's*
* capable of self-restraint.*
**[10:35] Aqua**
Let me think... If I had to say, it's like...
**[10:38] Kaz**
* A man who possesses a will of steel*
* and the strength to endure!*
**[10:45] Dark**
I could definitely drink this! It *is* good!
**[10:48] Kaz**
*Don't be tempted! I can't be tempted!*
**[10:50] Kaz**
* I'm sure there'll be no stopping*
* me once I get a taste!*
**[10:53] Megu**
Please give me some, too!
**[10:54] Megu**
Just for today! What can it hurt?
**[10:56] Dark**
No. I hear your whole life goes "poof"
if you start drinking in childhood.
**[11:00] Aqua**
Everyone drink up! I'm in a great mood now,
**[11:03] Aqua**
so I'll show you the grand unveiling
of my new party trick!
**[11:06] Aqua**
A trick of the fingers...
**[11:07] Aqua**
The mobile fortress, Destroyer!
**[11:12] Megu**
Th-The form, shape, and movements!
**[11:14] Megu**
It's the Destroyer for sure!
**[11:16] Dark**
To think you could mimic that movement!
**[11:18] Kaz**
*Again, what the heck is a Destroyer?!*
**[11:21] Megu**
Aqua, do it again! Do it again!
**[11:24] Aqua**
Art isn't something you can
just show off when asked.
**[11:26] Aqua**
It's something that presents itself
naturally when the soul commands it.
**[11:31] Dark**
What's wrong, Kazuma?
**[11:33] Dark**
Did the food my family
sent not suit your tastes?
**[11:36] Kaz**
N-No! The crab is super tasty.
**[11:39] Kaz**
It's just that I drank with some friends today
and don't think I can drink any more.
**[11:43] Kaz**
Tomorrow. I'll have some tomorrow.
**[11:46] Dark**
I see.
**[11:48] Kaz**
*Stop! Don't give me such a genuine smile!*
**[11:52] Kaz**
*You normally blurt out nothing but*
**[11:54] Kaz**
*nasty stuff that creeps me out!*
**[11:56] Dark**
At least eat lots, then.
**[11:59] Dark**
It's my thanks for everything.
**[12:01] Kaz**
*I kind of feel guilty...*
**[12:04] Kaz**
*That's right.*
**[12:05] Kaz**
* I should just drink with everyone*
* and forget about the dream.*
**[12:09] Kaz**
*Look at the faces of my allies here.*
**[12:11] Kaz**
*Think about which is more important!*
**[12:14] Kaz**
* Yes. There was never any need to worry*
* about anything in the first place.*
**[12:22] Kaz**
Well, it's a little early,
**[12:24] Kaz**
but I'm going to turn in.
**[12:27] Kaz**
Goodnight, everyone.
**[12:29] 4**
KONOSUBA!
**[12:35] Kaz**
*Crap, now my heart is pounding.*
**[12:37] Kaz**
*Aw, what should I do? What should I do?*
**[12:42] Kaz**
* I'm so nervous, expectant,*
* and turned on that I can't sleep!*
**[12:55] Kaz**
*I'm just having them give me a dream,*
**[12:57] Kaz**
*but etiquette is important.*
**[13:15] Kaz**
*The lantern flame went out?*
**[13:22] Kaz**
*Hey, whoa, whoa! No, wait...*
**[13:24] Kaz**
*I felt drowsy earlier and closed my eyes.*
**[13:27] Kaz**
*That would mean this is...*
**[13:31] Kaz**
*A dream?!*
**[13:35] Dark**
The moon really is pretty toni—
**[13:41] Kaz**
Yo.
**[13:49] Dark**
Wh-Wh... Wh-Wh-Wh...
**[13:56] Kaz**
* I always imagined she had a sexy body,*
* but this is better than I imagined.*
**[14:03] Kaz**
* Maybe the succubus adjusted*
* her to suit my tastes.*
**[14:06] Dark**
H-Hey, Kazu—
**[14:10] Kaz**
What's the matter, Darkness?
**[14:16] Kaz**
Come on over here.
**[14:19] Kaz**
You can start by washing my back.
**[14:21] Dark**
Ah... Huh?
**[14:26] Kaz**
What's with that reaction?
**[14:28] Kaz**
It's kind of new. I like it.
**[14:30] Kaz**
Still, why were you the one
to appear in my dream?
**[14:34] Kaz**
Maybe I shouldn't have requested a
beautiful older woman with a hot body?
**[14:37] Dark**
Wh-What are you talking about?
**[14:40] Kaz**
Is this strange?
**[14:40] Dark**
I, um, I mean... I have so many questions
that my brain can't quite keep up,
**[14:42] Kaz**
What could it be?
**[14:44] Dark**
like why you're so calm,
about washing your back,
**[14:47] Dark**
what you mean by a "dream,"
and what this is all about...
**[14:50] Kaz**
Whoops, playing hard-to-get wasn't
one of the settings I chose.
**[14:54] Kaz**
Though, I did write that I wanted a shy
older woman who was inexperienced.
**[14:59] Kaz**
I guess this works, then.
**[15:01] Dark**
Huh?
**[15:01] Kaz**
There's no way around you
being set to be inexperienced,
**[15:06] Kaz**
but please hurry and wash my back.
**[15:07] Dark**
U-Um...
**[15:09] Dark**
Is me washing your back considered
common sense in this situation?
**[15:14] Kaz**
Hurry! I can't stand it anymore,
in all sorts of ways!
**[15:17] Dark**
Y-Y-You...
**[15:18] Dark**
Do you understand what's going on right now?
**[15:21] Dark**
If Aqua or Megumin found out about this...
**[15:24] Kaz**
If that happens, why don't
we all just get in together?
**[15:28] Dark**
What's wrong with you?
Seriously, what's wrong with you today?!
**[15:32] Kaz**
Hey, you're being awfully noisy.
What time do you think it is?
**[15:35] Kaz**
Think about how much you're
bothering the neighbors!
**[15:37] Kaz**
One can only be so unsensible, you know.
**[15:39] Dark**
Saying something sensible in this situation
won't do any good at this point!
**[15:44] Dark**
Is it me? Am I the one with no common sense?
**[15:47] Dark**
Am I the strange one?!
**[15:48] Kaz**
Yeah, you're always strange in general.
**[15:52] Kaz**
Oh, this is a dream, so I guess it's
no problem if you make noise.
**[15:55] Kaz**
All right.
**[15:57] Kaz**
Please go ahead, then.
**[16:09] Dark**
Why is this happening?
**[16:11] Dark**
Still, it's pathetic that my disposition
**[16:14] Dark**
prevents me from resisting
when you order me so brazenly.
**[16:17] Kaz**
This feels new in all sorts of ways.
**[16:19] Kaz**
I'm the one who's usually creeped out by you,
**[16:22] Kaz**
so it's nice seeing you shy
and embarrassed for a change.
**[16:25] Dark**
Wh-Why, you...
**[16:27] Dark**
You're talking and acting
like some old man today!
**[16:30] Dark**
C-Come on, that's enough, right?
**[16:33] Dark**
C-Can I leave now?
**[16:36] Kaz**
Don't be foolish!
**[16:38] Kaz**
I know I set you to be inexperienced,
**[16:39] Kaz**
but don't you know what routinely comes next?
**[16:42] Kaz**
Next you dry me without using a towel.
**[16:44] Dark**
This is not right!
**[16:45] Dark**
No matter how inexperienced
I may be, that's definitely...
**[16:49] Kaz**
Hurry...
**[16:49] Dark**
totally...
**[16:52] Dark**
wrong...
**[16:54] Kaz**
Hurry...
**[16:57] Kaz**
Hurry!
**[17:04] Aqua**
Intruder! Show yourself!
**[17:07] Aqua**
Everyone, there's an intruder in the mansion!
**[17:09] Kaz**
Huh?
**[17:09] Dark**
Aqua's voice?
**[17:10] Kaz**
I didn't ask to be forced to wait at this point!
**[17:13] Kaz**
Even in my dreams, she gets in my way!
**[17:16] Kaz**
I'm gonna go complain!
**[17:17] Dark**
K-Kazuma?
**[17:20] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua!
**[17:23] Aqua**
Look, look!
**[17:24] Aqua**
An intruder got caught in my barrier,
and now she's immobilized...
**[17:28] Aqua**
We've got another suspicious guy here!
**[17:29] Kaz**
Who're you calling suspicious?!
**[17:33] Kaz**
*Oh, a succubus girl?*
**[17:36] Aqua**
This succubus got caught in the barrier,
and now she's immobilized.
**[17:40] Aqua**
I'm positive she was after you, Kazuma.
**[17:43] Kaz**
*What the heck? This is strange. Really strange.*
**[17:46] Kaz**
* Wait, was that "Darkness"*
* I ran into in the bathroom...*
**[17:51] Aqua**
I'll do an exorcism right away.
**[17:53] Megu**
Just be good and let us destroy you.
**[17:57] Aqua**
Just resign yourself.
**[17:59] Aqua**
I'm going to use an extraordinarily
powerful anti-devil—
**[18:02] Aqua**
Huh?
**[18:06] Suc**
Huh?
**[18:09] Kaz**
Run away.
**[18:10] Suc**
B-But...
**[18:12] Aqua**
What're you doing?
**[18:13] Aqua**
She's a devil who came here to
attack you and steal your vitality!
**[18:16] Megu**
Are you insane, Kazuma?
**[18:19] Suc**
Sir, it is due to my inexperience
**[18:22] Suc**
and failure to break in that
this has come to pass.
**[18:25] Suc**
I can't allow you to humiliate yourself.
**[18:28] Suc**
I will accept my elimination,
**[18:30] Suc**
so just pretend you don't know anything.
**[18:35] Suc**
Sir?
**[18:36] Aqua**
What's the big idea?
**[18:37] Aqua**
There's no way a goddess like myself
**[18:39] Aqua**
can let that devil get away.
**[18:42] Aqua**
Kazuma, if you don't want us
to beat you into submission,
**[18:45] Aqua**
then move aside.
**[18:50] Dark**
Kazuma has been charmed by that
succubus and is under her control!
**[18:54] Dark**
He's been acting weird since a little while ago!
**[18:57] Dark**
He's been blurting out things about dreams
and settings and so forth, so I'm sure of it!
**[19:02] Dark**
You accursed succubus, you put me
through so much humiliation...
**[19:05] Dark**
I'll slaughter you!
**[19:07] Megu**
Kazuma, she may be cute, but she's still a devil,
**[19:09] Megu**
a monster.
**[19:11] Megu**
Have you gone mad?
**[19:13] Kaz**
Go.
**[19:15] Suc**
But...
**[19:16] Aqua**
It looks like I'll have to settle this
score with Kazuma right here and now.
**[19:21] Aqua**
Once I've pulverized you,
**[19:23] Aqua**
I'll perform that succubus's last rites.
**[19:31] Kaz**
Fine.
**[19:39] Kaz**
* There are some things you*
* absolutely must protect.*
**[19:45] Kaz**
Bring it on!
**[19:58] Megu**
The succubus ran away, huh?
**[20:01] Aqua**
Better toss some salt.
**[20:03] 4**
KONOSUBA!
***SIGN*** The Next Day
**[20:10] Dark**
*Glance...*
**[20:15] Kaz**
Hey, talk to me already.
**[20:18] Kaz**
Besides, I think you're part of the problem,
**[20:20] Kaz**
since you got caught up in the mood, too.
**[20:28] Dark**
You really don't remember what
happened last night, right?
**[20:33] Dark**
You don't have any memory of it
since you were being controlled
**[20:37] Dark**
by that succubus, right?
**[20:39] Kaz**
Yeah, it's unfortunate, but I don't remember.
**[20:42] Kaz**
All I know is that I had a nice dream.
**[20:45] Dark**
I-I see. Good, then.
**[20:49] Dark**
Yeah, there's no helping it.
**[20:51] Dark**
It was sort of an accident.
**[20:53] Dark**
I'll try to forget about it, too.
**[20:55] Kaz**
*Last night, I was controlled by a succubus...*
**[21:00] Kaz**
*That's the story I'm going with!*
**[21:01] Kaz**
*A convenient explanation fell into my lap,*
**[21:03] Kaz**
*so I may as well go with it.*
**[21:05] Dark**
Still, you were kind of overbearing
at the time, and a little scary,
**[21:10] Dark**
but it wasn't bad.
**[21:12] Dark**
Although it was unacceptable
for you to instill in me
**[21:14] Dark**
whatever you pleased just
because I was ignorant of it...
**[21:17] Kaz**
Hey, it's not like you're really
some inexperienced lady.
**[21:21] Kaz**
Brush up on your common
sense a little more.
**[21:23] Dark**
Wha—
**[21:24] Kaz**
Besides, what happened clearly
wasn't my fault in any way.
**[21:29] Kaz**
I lit the lantern, and I put up the
sign saying the bath was in use.
**[21:33] Kaz**
Who the heck pranked us like this?
**[21:36] Dark**
H-Hey, you *do* remember last night, don't you?
**[21:40] Dark**
Were those actions really caused
by a succubus controlling you?!
**[21:45] Dark**
Hey, Kazuma!
**[21:49] Luna**
Destroyer alert! Destroyer alert!
**[21:52] Luna**
The mobile fortress, Destroyer,
is currently approaching this city!
**[21:56] Dark**
What?!
**[21:57] Kaz**
Huh? Destroyer?
***SIGN*** Knight Guidelines and Memorandum, Article 20 A knight must never leave their allies behind and run away, no matter how mighty the enemy. As an additional warning, you must never desire physical pain, or to receive sexual satisfaction. Having such thoughts is extremely abnormal, and knight or not, it is the lowest of acts you can perform as a human being.
***SIGN*** Episode 10
***SIGN*** A Final Flame for this Over-the-top Fortress!
**[23:30] Dark**
A knight must never run away,
no matter how mighty the enemy.
**[23:35] Dark**
As an additional warning, you must never
desire physical pain, or to receive—
# E10 - A Final Flame for this Over-the-top Fortress!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR5VX8W8R/gods-blessing-on-this-wonderful-shop)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:10] Megu**
Darkness! That's not fair!
**[00:16] Megu**
All right, then... Very well, very well.
**[00:19] Megu**
Go ahead and do as you please.
**[00:20] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma.
**[00:21] Aqua**
Relinquish that spot to me,
the exalted Aqua-sama.
**[00:25] Kaz**
Huh?
**[00:26] Aqua**
I'm level 21,
**[00:28] Aqua**
the highest level in the party.
**[00:31] Aqua**
You're being awfully impertinent
for an under-leveled lowbie.
**[00:34] Aqua**
If you get that, then give the spot
nearest the fireplace to your superior.
**[00:40] Kaz**
Huh?
**[00:41] Kaz**
I don't think your stats have risen
at all since I first saw them.
**[00:46] Aqua**
Kazuma, you fool.
**[00:47] Aqua**
My stats were obviously maxed
out from the very start!
**[00:51] Aqua**
You're mistaken to lump me together
with ordinary adventurers.
**[00:55] Megu**
Looks like my only choice now is
to whip out my deadly teleport.
**[00:58] Dark**
H-Hey, Megumin! That's not fair.
**[01:01] Megu**
Those are the rules.
**[01:02] Dark**
Huh?
**[01:03] Megu**
Destroyer, explosion!
**[01:05] Aqua**
Oh, what's this?
**[01:07] Aqua**
You're being very obedient.
**[01:11] Kaz**
*That explains why*
**[01:12] Kaz**
* her intelligence doesn't improve,*
* no matter how much she levels up.*
**[01:17] Aqua**
Hey, wait.
**[01:18] Aqua**
Why are you crying?
**[01:20] Aqua**
What's with that look in your eyes,
like you're staring at someone pitiful?
**[01:24] Kaz**
Goodnight.
**[01:25] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma!
**[01:27] Kaz**
*We acquired a mansion.*
**[01:29] Kaz**
* We resolved the matter of making it through*
* winter, which had been our top concern.*
**[01:34] Kaz**
* But we still have lots of*
* problems left to solve...*
**[01:37] Aqua**
Sheesh! What's your problem?!
**[01:57] Kaz**
Hey, what're you guys doing here?
**[02:01] Keith**
Oh, it's you, Kazuma?
Don't scare me like that.
**[02:05] Kaz**
* These guys are Keith and Dust,*
* two adventurers I got to know recently.*
**[02:09] Kaz**
You're way too jumpy.
**[02:11] Kaz**
Anyway, is there something down this way?
**[02:17] Dust**
This is a secret only for male adventurers.
**[02:21] Kaz**
Okay...
**[02:21] Dust**
Have you heard of a shop
covertly run by succubi
**[02:24] Dust**
that lets you have nice dreams?
**[02:29] Kaz**
Fill me in.
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 9
***SIGN*** "God's Blessing on This Wonderful Shop!"
**[04:18] Kaz**
* I don't think I could have come into*
* a place like this on my own.*
**[04:23] Suc**
Welcome!
**[04:25] Suc**
Please come this way.
**[04:26] Kaz**
Uh, sure.
**[04:28] C**
And his companions, right this way.
**[04:30] Keith**
Y-Yes!
**[04:31] Dust**
Okay...
**[04:34] Suc**
Please wait just a moment.
**[04:45] Kaz**
You're...
**[04:48] Ruff**
Welcome to Hell's door.
**[04:50] Ruff**
Do your best, you daredevil.
**[04:53] Kaz**
S-Sure.
**[04:56] Ruff**
I can hardly wait.
**[04:58] Kaz**
*Occupation... Artisan Weaver?*
**[05:01] Kaz**
*Huh?*
**[05:02] Kaz**
*He wasn't an adventurer?!*
**[05:04] Suc**
Sir?
**[05:06] Suc**
Sir?
**[05:07] Kaz**
Y-Yes?
**[05:09] Suc**
Is this your first time at our shop?
**[05:12] Kaz**
Oh, yes.
**[05:13] Suc**
Well, then, I will explain.
**[05:15] Kaz**
Please do.
**[05:16] Suc**
We succubi have established
**[05:17] Suc**
a mutually beneficial relationship with
the male adventurers of this city.
**[05:21] Kaz**
Yes.
**[05:21] Suc**
Many adventurers live in stables, correct?
**[05:25] Kaz**
Yes.
**[05:25] Suc**
So, I believe males get pent-up in various ways.
**[05:29] Suc**
But they are unable to do
anything about it since
**[05:32] Suc**
there are other adventurers
sleeping all around them.
**[05:35] Kaz**
*I have nothing to feel guilty about, but...*
**[05:38] Kaz**
*Yeah, there's nothing to feel guilty about!*
**[05:41] Suc**
Having said that,
**[05:42] Suc**
if they were to try to make a move on
a female adventurer sleeping nearby,
**[05:45] Suc**
the other adventurers would notice
instantly and beat them into submission.
**[05:50] Suc**
Or it's possible the person
he tried to mess around with
**[05:53] Suc**
could cut his you-know-what
off with a hidden dagger.
**[05:56] Kaz**
*Has that actually happened to anyone?*
**[06:00] Suc**
And so,
**[06:01] Suc**
we succubi give male adventurers
dreams that bring them relief.
**[06:06] Suc**
We do end up taking a bit of your vitality,
**[06:09] Suc**
but we do so in moderation
**[06:11] Suc**
to ensure it won't affect
your adventures or daily life.
**[06:15] Kaz**
*Wonderful! Beyond wonderful!*
**[06:19] Kaz**
* If everyone could be in a*
* constant state of afterglow,*
**[06:21] Kaz**
*there would be no war!*
**[06:23] Suc**
Please write your order for your desired dream
**[06:26] Suc**
on this questionnaire sheet.
**[06:29] Kaz**
Um, there are entries for
**[06:31] Kaz**
the customer's condition, gender,
and appearance in the dream...
**[06:35] Kaz**
Uh, what are these?
**[06:37] Suc**
Those are for requests such as
"I want to be a king or hero."
**[06:41] Suc**
We have customers who want to try
it from a female perspective, too.
**[06:45] Kaz**
Really?
**[06:48] Suc**
There are also those who
wish to return to boyhood
**[06:51] Suc**
and get pushed down by
strong female adventurers.
**[06:57] Kaz**
*Are the men in this city all right?*
**[07:01] Kaz**
Oh, what about this "partner preferences"?
**[07:04] Kaz**
How much can you actually configure?
**[07:06] Suc**
Their personality, speech patterns,
**[07:08] Suc**
appearance, and even how much they like you.
**[07:10] Suc**
It can be anything or anyone,
**[07:12] Suc**
whether they exist in real life or not.
**[07:14] Kaz**
For real?!
**[07:16] Suc**
For real.
**[07:17] Kaz**
So a specific famous girl,
a girl who's close to me,
**[07:20] Kaz**
or even a 2D waifu would be possible?
**[07:22] Suc**
Yes, though I don't know what a "2D waifu" is.
**[07:27] Kaz**
Would the rights to one's likeness
and so forth cause problems?
**[07:31] Suc**
They wouldn't. It's a dream, after all.
**[07:34] Kaz**
That's true!
**[07:36] Kaz**
Would that mean there's no restriction
on your partner's age, either?
**[07:41] Kaz**
Oh, not that I intend to ask for that sort of thing.
**[07:43] Kaz**
I just... How should I put it...
**[07:45] Suc**
There is not.
**[07:46] Suc**
Please choose whatever you like.
**[07:48] Kaz**
I-Is that okay?
**[07:51] Kaz**
In terms of, you know, regulations and stuff?
**[07:54] Suc**
It's all right. It is a dream, after all.
**[07:57] Kaz**
That's true!
**[07:59] Kaz**
*Yeah, there's no problem if it's in a dream!*
**[08:02] Kaz**
*I can't believe this!*
**[08:03] Kaz**
* Succubi erotic dream*
* services are the greatest!*
**[08:07] Suc**
Oh, also, please be careful not to
drink too much this evening, okay?
**[08:10] Suc**
If you sleep too soundly,
we can't show you any dreams.
**[08:14] Kaz**
All right, understood!
**[08:16] All**
KO-NOSUBA!
**[08:19] Kaz**
I'm back.
**[08:26] Aqua**
Be glad, Kazuma!
Tonight's dinner is incredible!
**[08:30] Aqua**
It's crab! Crab!
**[08:32] Dark**
My family sent them to
congratulate us on moving in.
**[08:36] Aqua**
It's super high-grade marbled red crab,
**[08:38] Aqua**
and it even came with this
amazing, top-quality liquor!
**[08:41] Aqua**
They said it's to thank
**[08:42] Aqua**
their daughter's party members
for always looking out for her!
**[08:46] Megu**
I can hardly believe I'm laying
my eyes on marbled red crab!
**[08:49] Megu**
I've never been more glad that
I joined this party than I am today.
**[08:53] Kaz**
Is it that luxurious?
**[08:55] Megu**
Of course!
**[08:56] Megu**
If you told me I could eat this crab
**[08:58] Megu**
in exchange for holding off on
using explosion magic for the day,
**[09:00] Megu**
I would restrain myself with pleasure,
**[09:02] Megu**
and unleash my explosion
magic after I've eaten!
**[09:05] Megu**
That's how luxurious it is!
**[09:08] Kaz**
Wow, that's aweso— Huh?
**[09:10] Kaz**
What did you say at the end there?
**[09:27] Kaz**
*Gulp.*
**[09:37] Kaz**
*Oh, no!*
**[09:38] Kaz**
*I can't stop myself!*
**[09:42] Kaz**
*Crack!*
**[09:44] Kaz**
*Crack!*
**[09:46] Kaz**
*Crack!*
**[09:50] Aqua**
Kazuma, Kazuma!
**[09:51] Aqua**
Give me a little fire.
**[09:53] Aqua**
I'll teach you a tasty way to drink this.
**[09:57] Kaz**
Here. Tinder!
**[10:00] Aqua**
Just place a shell filled with
crab innards here, and...
**[10:09] Aqua**
It should be ready.
**[10:17] 3**
*Gulp.*
**[10:19] Kaz**
M-Me, too!
**[10:23] Kaz**
*This is a trap!*
**[10:25] Kaz**
*That succubus lady told me, didn't she?*
**[10:25] Dark**
That's a clever idea.
**[10:27] Kaz**
* If I drink too much and sleep soundly,*
* I won't be able to dream!*
**[10:27] Aqua**
Isn't it? Nothing less from me!
**[10:30] Megu**
Yeah!
**[10:31] Megu**
Aqua, Aqua, what does it taste like?
**[10:31] Dark**
Not going to drink? I'll go first, then.
**[10:34] Kaz**
* Calm down. I'm a man who's*
* capable of self-restraint.*
**[10:35] Aqua**
Let me think... If I had to say, it's like...
**[10:38] Kaz**
* A man who possesses a will of steel*
* and the strength to endure!*
**[10:45] Dark**
I could definitely drink this! It *is* good!
**[10:48] Kaz**
*Don't be tempted! I can't be tempted!*
**[10:50] Kaz**
* I'm sure there'll be no stopping*
* me once I get a taste!*
**[10:53] Megu**
Please give me some, too!
**[10:54] Megu**
Just for today! What can it hurt?
**[10:56] Dark**
No. I hear your whole life goes "poof"
if you start drinking in childhood.
**[11:00] Aqua**
Everyone drink up! I'm in a great mood now,
**[11:03] Aqua**
so I'll show you the grand unveiling
of my new party trick!
**[11:06] Aqua**
A trick of the fingers...
**[11:07] Aqua**
The mobile fortress, Destroyer!
**[11:12] Megu**
Th-The form, shape, and movements!
**[11:14] Megu**
It's the Destroyer for sure!
**[11:16] Dark**
To think you could mimic that movement!
**[11:18] Kaz**
*Again, what the heck is a Destroyer?!*
**[11:21] Megu**
Aqua, do it again! Do it again!
**[11:24] Aqua**
Art isn't something you can
just show off when asked.
**[11:26] Aqua**
It's something that presents itself
naturally when the soul commands it.
**[11:31] Dark**
What's wrong, Kazuma?
**[11:33] Dark**
Did the food my family
sent not suit your tastes?
**[11:36] Kaz**
N-No! The crab is super tasty.
**[11:39] Kaz**
It's just that I drank with some friends today
and don't think I can drink any more.
**[11:43] Kaz**
Tomorrow. I'll have some tomorrow.
**[11:46] Dark**
I see.
**[11:48] Kaz**
*Stop! Don't give me such a genuine smile!*
**[11:52] Kaz**
*You normally blurt out nothing but*
**[11:54] Kaz**
*nasty stuff that creeps me out!*
**[11:56] Dark**
At least eat lots, then.
**[11:59] Dark**
It's my thanks for everything.
**[12:01] Kaz**
*I kind of feel guilty...*
**[12:04] Kaz**
*That's right.*
**[12:05] Kaz**
* I should just drink with everyone*
* and forget about the dream.*
**[12:09] Kaz**
*Look at the faces of my allies here.*
**[12:11] Kaz**
*Think about which is more important!*
**[12:14] Kaz**
* Yes. There was never any need to worry*
* about anything in the first place.*
**[12:22] Kaz**
Well, it's a little early,
**[12:24] Kaz**
but I'm going to turn in.
**[12:27] Kaz**
Goodnight, everyone.
**[12:29] 4**
KONOSUBA!
**[12:35] Kaz**
*Crap, now my heart is pounding.*
**[12:37] Kaz**
*Aw, what should I do? What should I do?*
**[12:42] Kaz**
* I'm so nervous, expectant,*
* and turned on that I can't sleep!*
**[12:55] Kaz**
*I'm just having them give me a dream,*
**[12:57] Kaz**
*but etiquette is important.*
**[13:15] Kaz**
*The lantern flame went out?*
**[13:22] Kaz**
*Hey, whoa, whoa! No, wait...*
**[13:24] Kaz**
*I felt drowsy earlier and closed my eyes.*
**[13:27] Kaz**
*That would mean this is...*
**[13:31] Kaz**
*A dream?!*
**[13:35] Dark**
The moon really is pretty toni—
**[13:41] Kaz**
Yo.
**[13:49] Dark**
Wh-Wh... Wh-Wh-Wh...
**[13:56] Kaz**
* I always imagined she had a sexy body,*
* but this is better than I imagined.*
**[14:03] Kaz**
* Maybe the succubus adjusted*
* her to suit my tastes.*
**[14:06] Dark**
H-Hey, Kazu—
**[14:10] Kaz**
What's the matter, Darkness?
**[14:16] Kaz**
Come on over here.
**[14:19] Kaz**
You can start by washing my back.
**[14:21] Dark**
Ah... Huh?
**[14:26] Kaz**
What's with that reaction?
**[14:28] Kaz**
It's kind of new. I like it.
**[14:30] Kaz**
Still, why were you the one
to appear in my dream?
**[14:34] Kaz**
Maybe I shouldn't have requested a
beautiful older woman with a hot body?
**[14:37] Dark**
Wh-What are you talking about?
**[14:40] Kaz**
Is this strange?
**[14:40] Dark**
I, um, I mean... I have so many questions
that my brain can't quite keep up,
**[14:42] Kaz**
What could it be?
**[14:44] Dark**
like why you're so calm,
about washing your back,
**[14:47] Dark**
what you mean by a "dream,"
and what this is all about...
**[14:50] Kaz**
Whoops, playing hard-to-get wasn't
one of the settings I chose.
**[14:54] Kaz**
Though, I did write that I wanted a shy
older woman who was inexperienced.
**[14:59] Kaz**
I guess this works, then.
**[15:01] Dark**
Huh?
**[15:01] Kaz**
There's no way around you
being set to be inexperienced,
**[15:06] Kaz**
but please hurry and wash my back.
**[15:07] Dark**
U-Um...
**[15:09] Dark**
Is me washing your back considered
common sense in this situation?
**[15:14] Kaz**
Hurry! I can't stand it anymore,
in all sorts of ways!
**[15:17] Dark**
Y-Y-You...
**[15:18] Dark**
Do you understand what's going on right now?
**[15:21] Dark**
If Aqua or Megumin found out about this...
**[15:24] Kaz**
If that happens, why don't
we all just get in together?
**[15:28] Dark**
What's wrong with you?
Seriously, what's wrong with you today?!
**[15:32] Kaz**
Hey, you're being awfully noisy.
What time do you think it is?
**[15:35] Kaz**
Think about how much you're
bothering the neighbors!
**[15:37] Kaz**
One can only be so unsensible, you know.
**[15:39] Dark**
Saying something sensible in this situation
won't do any good at this point!
**[15:44] Dark**
Is it me? Am I the one with no common sense?
**[15:47] Dark**
Am I the strange one?!
**[15:48] Kaz**
Yeah, you're always strange in general.
**[15:52] Kaz**
Oh, this is a dream, so I guess it's
no problem if you make noise.
**[15:55] Kaz**
All right.
**[15:57] Kaz**
Please go ahead, then.
**[16:09] Dark**
Why is this happening?
**[16:11] Dark**
Still, it's pathetic that my disposition
**[16:14] Dark**
prevents me from resisting
when you order me so brazenly.
**[16:17] Kaz**
This feels new in all sorts of ways.
**[16:19] Kaz**
I'm the one who's usually creeped out by you,
**[16:22] Kaz**
so it's nice seeing you shy
and embarrassed for a change.
**[16:25] Dark**
Wh-Why, you...
**[16:27] Dark**
You're talking and acting
like some old man today!
**[16:30] Dark**
C-Come on, that's enough, right?
**[16:33] Dark**
C-Can I leave now?
**[16:36] Kaz**
Don't be foolish!
**[16:38] Kaz**
I know I set you to be inexperienced,
**[16:39] Kaz**
but don't you know what routinely comes next?
**[16:42] Kaz**
Next you dry me without using a towel.
**[16:44] Dark**
This is not right!
**[16:45] Dark**
No matter how inexperienced
I may be, that's definitely...
**[16:49] Kaz**
Hurry...
**[16:49] Dark**
totally...
**[16:52] Dark**
wrong...
**[16:54] Kaz**
Hurry...
**[16:57] Kaz**
Hurry!
**[17:04] Aqua**
Intruder! Show yourself!
**[17:07] Aqua**
Everyone, there's an intruder in the mansion!
**[17:09] Kaz**
Huh?
**[17:09] Dark**
Aqua's voice?
**[17:10] Kaz**
I didn't ask to be forced to wait at this point!
**[17:13] Kaz**
Even in my dreams, she gets in my way!
**[17:16] Kaz**
I'm gonna go complain!
**[17:17] Dark**
K-Kazuma?
**[17:20] Kaz**
Hey, Aqua!
**[17:23] Aqua**
Look, look!
**[17:24] Aqua**
An intruder got caught in my barrier,
and now she's immobilized...
**[17:28] Aqua**
We've got another suspicious guy here!
**[17:29] Kaz**
Who're you calling suspicious?!
**[17:33] Kaz**
*Oh, a succubus girl?*
**[17:36] Aqua**
This succubus got caught in the barrier,
and now she's immobilized.
**[17:40] Aqua**
I'm positive she was after you, Kazuma.
**[17:43] Kaz**
*What the heck? This is strange. Really strange.*
**[17:46] Kaz**
* Wait, was that "Darkness"*
* I ran into in the bathroom...*
**[17:51] Aqua**
I'll do an exorcism right away.
**[17:53] Megu**
Just be good and let us destroy you.
**[17:57] Aqua**
Just resign yourself.
**[17:59] Aqua**
I'm going to use an extraordinarily
powerful anti-devil—
**[18:02] Aqua**
Huh?
**[18:06] Suc**
Huh?
**[18:09] Kaz**
Run away.
**[18:10] Suc**
B-But...
**[18:12] Aqua**
What're you doing?
**[18:13] Aqua**
She's a devil who came here to
attack you and steal your vitality!
**[18:16] Megu**
Are you insane, Kazuma?
**[18:19] Suc**
Sir, it is due to my inexperience
**[18:22] Suc**
and failure to break in that
this has come to pass.
**[18:25] Suc**
I can't allow you to humiliate yourself.
**[18:28] Suc**
I will accept my elimination,
**[18:30] Suc**
so just pretend you don't know anything.
**[18:35] Suc**
Sir?
**[18:36] Aqua**
What's the big idea?
**[18:37] Aqua**
There's no way a goddess like myself
**[18:39] Aqua**
can let that devil get away.
**[18:42] Aqua**
Kazuma, if you don't want us
to beat you into submission,
**[18:45] Aqua**
then move aside.
**[18:50] Dark**
Kazuma has been charmed by that
succubus and is under her control!
**[18:54] Dark**
He's been acting weird since a little while ago!
**[18:57] Dark**
He's been blurting out things about dreams
and settings and so forth, so I'm sure of it!
**[19:02] Dark**
You accursed succubus, you put me
through so much humiliation...
**[19:05] Dark**
I'll slaughter you!
**[19:07] Megu**
Kazuma, she may be cute, but she's still a devil,
**[19:09] Megu**
a monster.
**[19:11] Megu**
Have you gone mad?
**[19:13] Kaz**
Go.
**[19:15] Suc**
But...
**[19:16] Aqua**
It looks like I'll have to settle this
score with Kazuma right here and now.
**[19:21] Aqua**
Once I've pulverized you,
**[19:23] Aqua**
I'll perform that succubus's last rites.
**[19:31] Kaz**
Fine.
**[19:39] Kaz**
* There are some things you*
* absolutely must protect.*
**[19:45] Kaz**
Bring it on!
**[19:58] Megu**
The succubus ran away, huh?
**[20:01] Aqua**
Better toss some salt.
**[20:03] 4**
KONOSUBA!
***SIGN*** The Next Day
**[20:10] Dark**
*Glance...*
**[20:15] Kaz**
Hey, talk to me already.
**[20:18] Kaz**
Besides, I think you're part of the problem,
**[20:20] Kaz**
since you got caught up in the mood, too.
**[20:28] Dark**
You really don't remember what
happened last night, right?
**[20:33] Dark**
You don't have any memory of it
since you were being controlled
**[20:37] Dark**
by that succubus, right?
**[20:39] Kaz**
Yeah, it's unfortunate, but I don't remember.
**[20:42] Kaz**
All I know is that I had a nice dream.
**[20:45] Dark**
I-I see. Good, then.
**[20:49] Dark**
Yeah, there's no helping it.
**[20:51] Dark**
It was sort of an accident.
**[20:53] Dark**
I'll try to forget about it, too.
**[20:55] Kaz**
*Last night, I was controlled by a succubus...*
**[21:00] Kaz**
*That's the story I'm going with!*
**[21:01] Kaz**
*A convenient explanation fell into my lap,*
**[21:03] Kaz**
*so I may as well go with it.*
**[21:05] Dark**
Still, you were kind of overbearing
at the time, and a little scary,
**[21:10] Dark**
but it wasn't bad.
**[21:12] Dark**
Although it was unacceptable
for you to instill in me
**[21:14] Dark**
whatever you pleased just
because I was ignorant of it...
**[21:17] Kaz**
Hey, it's not like you're really
some inexperienced lady.
**[21:21] Kaz**
Brush up on your common
sense a little more.
**[21:23] Dark**
Wha—
**[21:24] Kaz**
Besides, what happened clearly
wasn't my fault in any way.
**[21:29] Kaz**
I lit the lantern, and I put up the
sign saying the bath was in use.
**[21:33] Kaz**
Who the heck pranked us like this?
**[21:36] Dark**
H-Hey, you *do* remember last night, don't you?
**[21:40] Dark**
Were those actions really caused
by a succubus controlling you?!
**[21:45] Dark**
Hey, Kazuma!
**[21:49] Luna**
Destroyer alert! Destroyer alert!
**[21:52] Luna**
The mobile fortress, Destroyer,
is currently approaching this city!
**[21:56] Dark**
What?!
**[21:57] Kaz**
Huh? Destroyer?
***SIGN*** Knight Guidelines and Memorandum, Article 20 A knight must never leave their allies behind and run away, no matter how mighty the enemy. As an additional warning, you must never desire physical pain, or to receive sexual satisfaction. Having such thoughts is extremely abnormal, and knight or not, it is the lowest of acts you can perform as a human being.
***SIGN*** Episode 10
***SIGN*** A Final Flame for this Over-the-top Fortress!
**[23:30] Dark**
A knight must never run away,
no matter how mighty the enemy.
**[23:35] Dark**
As an additional warning, you must never
desire physical pain, or to receive—
# OVA1 - God's Blessings on This Wonderful Choker!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G69VEKNVY/gods-blessings-on-this-wonderful-choker)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] Kids**
My turn!
**[00:04] K**
Hey, Wiz. We came to visit.
**[00:07] W**
Kazuma-san! You're all here!
**[00:10] W**
Welcome to the store.
**[00:12] D**
Pardon the intrusion.
**[00:13] A**
Why did we have to come
to some undead's shop?
**[00:23] YY**
Y-You just saw me, didn't you?!
Why are you ignoring me?
**[00:29] M**
Well, if it isn't my
self-proclaimed rival, Yunyun.
**[00:32] YY**
Don't say it's self-proclaimed!
**[00:34] M**
Oh? Is that wrong?
**[00:36] YY**
I-It is! I really am your rival!
**[00:40] K**
* This is a Crimson Demon girl*
* we've recently gotten to know.*
**[00:44] K**
*She calls herself Megumin's rival,*
**[00:46] K**
* and challenges her every time*
* they run into each other, but...*
**[00:49] YY**
Now, Megumin,
**[00:50] YY**
it's a complete and total coincidence
that we met here, but no matter!
**[00:55] YY**
Today we're settling this!
***SIGN*** Episode 11
***SIGN*** "God's Blessings On This Wonderful Choker!"
**[02:28] YY**
Come on! Come on!
**[02:32] M**
Settle what, exactly?
**[02:34] M**
I've won nearly every contest
you've challenged me to.
**[02:37] YY**
Sh-Shut up, you!
**[02:40] YY**
Sorry...
**[02:41] YY**
We'll do this outside so we won't
cause trouble in your store.
**[02:45] W**
Oh, it's okay.
**[02:46] W**
I know that the reason
you started shopping here
**[02:49] W**
was because you heard that Megumin-san
and her friends come by sometimes.
**[02:55] YY**
E-Excuse me!
**[02:56] YY**
I'd like to buy this today!
What a cool-looking choker!
**[03:00] K**
* Wait, has she been coming here all*
* the time hoping to run into Megumin?*
**[03:05] D**
Look, Yunyun... I mean...
**[03:08] D**
You can always just visit
our mansion, all right?
**[03:11] YY**
What? R-Really?
**[03:14] YY**
But if I show up with snacks and drinks,
you won't look at me like,
**[03:18] YY**
"Wow, you actually came? Can't you
tell when someone is just being nice?"
**[03:21] YY**
and act really annoyed, will you?
**[03:23] M**
You are as irritating as ever!
**[03:26] M**
If you want to come by, just do it whenever!
**[03:30] M**
So, what are we going to do?
Aren't we having a contest?
**[03:33] YY**
Hang on, Megumin!
**[03:36] YY**
I don't get to talk to this
many people very often.
**[03:40] YY**
Can the contest wait
until this evening, maybe?
**[03:43] M**
You can never make up your mind, can you?
**[03:46] M**
That's the problem with you loner types!
**[03:47] A**
Hey, can I get some tea over here?
**[03:50] A**
And something to eat, while you're at it.
**[03:52] W**
Right, Aqua-sama!
I'll grab something right away!
**[03:58] D**
Are you okay?!
**[04:00] W**
Sorry! I'm all right!
**[04:02] A**
Hey, we're losing daylight here!
**[04:05] K**
This bunch is always so noisy...
**[04:08] W**
Are you okay?
**[04:09] K**
I could really go for some comfort.
**[04:13] K**
What's this?
**[04:16] K**
"An uncharacteristically popular
item sold at our shop."
**[04:20] K**
"A choker that can grant wishes."
**[04:22] K**
I'm not sure a shop should say an item's
popularity is "uncharacteristic"...
**[04:26] K**
And the price is a relatively
steep 100,000 eris.
**[04:29] M**
What are these?!
What are these boobs of yours?!
**[04:32] M**
Have they grown again?!
**[04:33] M**
Are you showing them off?!
**[04:35] YY**
Cut it out! Don't get mad at me
just because yours won't grow!
**[04:35] ---**
Damn you!
**[04:38] M**
They're so bouncy!
**[04:39] A**
Uh, excuse me. This tea is barely warm.
**[04:42] A**
This is the problem with you undead
and your low body temperatures...
**[04:45] W**
I'm so sorry, Aqua-sama!
**[04:47] D**
What is this "potion that attracts beasts"?
**[04:50] D**
F-For instance, would it make
men who are beastlike
**[04:52] D**
in certain ways find you more attractive?
**[04:55] W**
It's a potion that attracts
beast-type monsters.
**[04:58] W**
It makes monsters attack you one after
another, without a moment's rest.
**[05:02] D**
I'll take it!
**[05:03] W**
Huh? Are you sure?
**[05:06] W**
You really won't have a moment's rest...
**[05:07] K**
So it's an item that increases
your luck when equipped?
**[05:14] D**
K-Kazuma-san!
**[05:16] D**
Th-Th-That's...
**[05:18] K**
Oh, the wish-granting choker?
**[05:21] K**
Should I not have tried it on?
**[05:24] W**
Th-That's a magic item that stays
on until your wish comes true,
**[05:27] W**
and it tightens every day
that wish isn't granted!
**[05:30] K**
You mean it's cursed?!
**[05:32] W**
No, it's not! It's really popular with women!
**[05:35] W**
It helps them get really, really
motivated to lose weight...
**[05:40] K**
* You have to grant your wish yourself?*
* Is this some kind of joke?!*
**[05:44] A**
So what did you wish for anyway, Kazuma?
**[05:47] K**
Well, I didn't even wish for
anything in particular.
**[05:51] W**
That's bad, Kazuma-san!
**[05:53] W**
If we don't do something, the choker will
gradually tighten, and in four days...
**[05:56] K**
You're saying I'm gonna die because
of some stupid dieting gimmick?!
**[06:00] YY**
It's my fault.
**[06:01] YY**
Kazuma-san picked up that choker
because I dropped it, and now he's...
**[06:06] M**
It's my fault for yelling at you, too, Yunyun.
**[06:09] D**
No, if Wiz hadn't been
distracted by Aqua and me...
**[06:13] D**
I'm sorry, Kazuma.
**[06:15] W**
It's really my fault!
**[06:17] W**
I shouldn't have left something
so dangerous on the store shelf.
**[06:24] W**
Kazuma-san...
**[06:26] W**
I'll do whatever it takes
to get that choker off.
**[06:29] W**
Don't worry!
**[06:31] YY**
I'll help, too!
**[06:32] M**
Wh-When the Crimson Demons' greatest
sorceress prodigy gets to work,
**[06:35] M**
removing a magic item
like that is child's play!
**[06:38] D**
You'll have my help, as well!
**[06:42] A**
Hey, I didn't do anything wrong!
**[06:44] A**
But just for the record...
**[06:46] A**
Sorry! If you die, I'll be sure
to cast Resurrection on you.
**[06:52] K**
Maybe I won't come back
to life next time I die.
**[06:55] K**
I'll go on strike from living.
**[06:57] A**
Wh-What are you saying?
**[06:59] A**
Don't the two of us have
to slay the Devil King?
**[07:02] K**
Not to mention, if I die, you take sole
possession of our considerable debt.
**[07:07] A**
Fine!
**[07:08] A**
You just want me to help, too, right?!
**[07:11] A**
We'll do whatever you want
until that choker comes off!
**[07:15] K**
Did you just say "whatever you want"?
**[07:22] W**
U-Um, Kazuma-san?
**[07:25] K**
Kazuma here.
**[07:26] W**
I-Is it... comfortable?
**[07:30] K**
Your thighs are nice and cool, Wiz.
**[07:33] K**
And very soft.
**[07:35] K**
Plus...
**[07:37] K**
Seeing how embarrassed
it makes you is great.
**[07:40] W**
I-I see...
**[07:41] W**
Well, um... th-thank you?
**[07:45] K**
*A wish-granting choker...*
**[07:47] K**
*This is much better than I thought!*
**[07:49] K**
* I've got four whole days*
* until it strangles me.*
**[07:52] K**
*I'm sure it'll work out.*
**[07:54] M**
It's only his first wish, and he's already
putting his lust on full display.
**[07:58] D**
Very well!
**[07:59] D**
I don't know what it is you want,
**[08:01] D**
but I can deal with anything you—
**[08:03] K**
Ditch the armor and give me 100 push-ups.
**[08:15] D**
One... two...
**[08:19] D**
three... four...
**[08:22] D**
five... six...
**[08:26] K**
seven...
**[08:27] K**
Now this isn't bad at all.
**[08:30] D**
I-I'm being exposed to his
animalistic, hungry gaze
**[08:32] D**
with no means of escape!
**[08:35] D**
In his head, I'm surely being reduced
**[08:37] D**
to an even more shameful state...
**[08:41] D**
St—
**[08:42] D**
Stop it!
**[08:44] D**
And yet... as a knight, I must not yield!
**[08:49] A**
Unbelievable...
**[08:50] A**
He's going to use beautiful girls like us
to fulfill his every twisted desire!
**[08:57] K**
Go grab me a yakisoba bun,
and make it snappy.
**[08:59] A**
Why?!
**[09:02] W**
Aqua-sama!
**[09:04] K**
Now, then...
**[09:07] K**
You two are rivals, right?
**[09:09] M**
No, that's just Yunyun's idea.
**[09:11] K**
The two of you are going to
have a little competition.
**[09:16] YY**
W-Well, if you insist!
I challenge you, Megumin!
**[09:19] M**
Why are you so happy about this?
**[09:22] K**
I will decide the contest,
**[09:25] K**
and the winner will be chosen
at my discretion, as I see fit.
**[09:33] W**
Excuse me...
**[09:37] W**
Shouldn't you be face-up when
using someone's lap as a pillow?
**[09:41] K**
Where I was born, we do
it like this sometimes.
**[09:44] W**
R-Really?
**[09:46] A**
'ere you ahr!
**[09:47] W**
Too slow! And I think you mean,
"I brought your food, sir!"
**[09:50] A**
Fuhd, shur!
**[09:56] K**
Hey...
**[09:57] K**
You ate half of this, didn't you?
**[10:00] A**
Dih noth!
**[10:01] K**
She's got her cheeks stuffed
like a damn squirrel!
**[10:04] YYM**
Rock, paper, scissors!
**[10:08] M**
It is the law of this world to grant me victory.
**[10:17] A**
What are those two doing?
**[10:19] K**
Strip rock-paper-scissors.
**[10:21] A**
You are shockingly straightforward
with what you want, aren't you?
**[10:24] A**
Even I'm creeped out by that.
**[10:27] M**
Yunyun... At this rate,
we're both going to suffer.
**[10:32] YY**
A-As the one who'll lead the
Crimson Demons one day,
**[10:35] YY**
I can't afford to lose to you, Megumin!
**[10:37] M**
You decide to be stubborn *now*?!
**[10:40] A**
You're not planning to have
me do that next, are you?
**[10:44] K**
Next, go buy some expensive bubbly.
**[10:46] A**
Why?!
**[10:49] W**
Aqua-sama!
**[10:52] MYY**
Rock, paper, scissors!
**[10:54] MYY**
One more time! One more time!
**[10:57] MYY**
Again! Again! Again!
**[10:59] MYY**
Rock, paper, scissors!
**[11:03] MYY**
One more time! One more time!
**[11:06] K**
If you tie three more times,
you both have to take something off.
**[11:16] M**
Yunyun...
**[11:18] M**
I have faith in you.
**[11:20] M**
You're my rival, and my friend.
**[11:23] M**
I know you wouldn't be led
astray by what he says.
**[11:27] YY**
Megumin...
**[11:28] YY**
I have faith in you, too.
**[11:31] YY**
Let's go! One more time!
**[11:42] M**
What?! Are you just mad because you lost?!
**[11:45] M**
Hey! Stop that! I'm going to fall out!
**[11:49] M**
Stop it already!
**[11:50] W**
Um, uh, Kazuma-san,
should you stop them?
**[11:54] K**
Wiz...
**[11:55] K**
I can't help it.
**[11:57] K**
This is the only way to get
the choker to come off.
**[12:02] W**
I guess you're right...
**[12:04] K**
Thank you for being so understanding.
**[12:07] D**
Kazuma!
**[12:08] D**
I've finished the hundred push-ups!
**[12:11] D**
I didn't think you'd leave me alone in there.
**[12:14] D**
The humiliation and isolation were so—
**[12:16] K**
Next up is 100 sit-ups.
**[12:21] K**
KONOSUBA!
**[12:31] A**
I've been defiled... I'm a goddess,
but I've been defiled...
**[12:38] W**
Um... Has the choker come off yet?
**[12:42] K**
It's terribly unfortunate,
**[12:44] K**
but it looks like we'll have to keep making
my wishes come true tomorrow, too.
**[12:50] K**
KO! NO! SU! BA!
**[12:54] K**
KONOSUBA!
**[12:59] K**
* After that, I continued to grant all*
* the wishes I could come up with.*
**[13:03] A**
Why am I doing this?
**[13:07] D**
More exercise today?
**[13:13] YY**
This is embarrassing...
**[13:14] M**
Something about this choice of
clothing seems malicious to me.
**[13:22] K**
Oh, nice! Okay, next!
**[13:34] D**
I just have to wash myself?
**[13:39] K**
Yes. Nothing more.
**[13:41] K**
And I will watch!
**[13:44] A**
You're going to defile the goddess
again today, aren't you?
**[13:47] A**
What are you going to make me do?
**[13:48] Kazuma**
I want you to find us a natural hot spring.
**[13:51] Kazuma**
You can do that, right?
**[13:52] A**
Huh? Why?
**[13:54] K**
You're a water goddess, aren't you?
**[13:56] K**
Wait, I'm sorry. It was the
goddess of party tricks, wasn't it?
**[13:59] A**
Fine! I'll do it!
**[14:02] A**
I'll show you what a goddess can do!
**[14:05] YY**
A-Are you itchy anywhere?
**[14:09] K**
If I had to say, maybe in front.
**[14:11] M**
What? Your d***?
**[14:13] M**
Just rip that thing off.
**[14:18] K**
Oh, I think the choker's starting to tighten.
**[14:23] K**
What should I do? Am I gonna die?
**[14:28] K**
Go on! Go on, do it!
**[14:30] K**
Go on, now!
**[14:32] K**
What're you you so scared of?
You're the one who mentioned my d***!
**[14:33] YY**
Megumin!
**[14:35] K**
Go on! Rip it off! Hurry it up, now!
**[14:37] K**
Try and rip it off!
**[14:39] K**
My d***!
**[14:39] A**
It's coming... I can sense it...
**[14:41] K**
Go on!
**[14:43] K**
Quickly, now!
**[14:45] K**
Go ahead!
**[14:48] A**
Here it comes!
**[15:00] A**
KO! NO! SU! BA!
**[15:08] K**
Why won't it come off?
**[15:10] K**
Every wish I can think of has been granted...
**[15:14] M**
All the wishes you could
think up were perverted?
**[15:19] K**
What am I missing?
**[15:22] K**
Wiz, could you give me something to drink?
**[15:25] W**
Oh, okay.
**[15:25] K**
From your mouth, I mean.
**[15:29] A**
Oh, enough!
**[15:30] A**
Tomorrow's the fourth day!
**[15:32] A**
It seems pretty clear that your
disgusting wishes aren't working!
**[15:35] K**
What was that, you useless goddess?!
**[15:35] YY**
Maybe my specialty magic,
Light of Saber, could do something...
**[15:36] K**
You sure you're not just doing
a bad job granting them?!
**[15:38] A**
I've been doing my best, for your information!
**[15:40] M**
I get it.
**[15:40] K**
And how dare you call it disgusting?!
**[15:41] M**
Then, after we've cut Kazuma's head off,
we can easily remove the choker?
**[15:42] K**
Taking a drink from a girl's
mouth is the dream of every man!
**[15:45] YY**
He'd be dead!
**[15:47] YY**
I just wondered if there was a
way to cut only the choker off!
**[15:50] D**
Kazuma! Kazuma!
**[15:51] D**
You're being gradually strangled...
**[15:54] D**
What's it feel like?!
**[15:55] D**
Is it the best, Kazuma?!
**[15:57] D**
Is the grip slowly tightening
around you fantastic?!
**[16:00] K**
Stop it!
**[16:01] A**
Isn't there anything else you want?
**[16:08] K**
I can't think of anything.
**[16:09] M**
Well, you'd better come up with something!
**[16:11] M**
I can't afford to have you die!
**[16:24] M**
Tomorrow's the last day...
**[16:28] M**
Oh, it's you, Yunyun.
**[16:31] YY**
Why are you trying so hard
for Kazuma-san's sake?
**[16:38] M**
If Kazuma is gone,
**[16:39] M**
who will carry me home after
I've used my explosion magic?
**[16:44] M**
His existence is a necessity
for my mastery of explosions!
**[16:50] M**
Besides...
**[17:21] M**
Kazuma is my friend.
**[17:23] M**
The greatest mind of the Crimson Demons
**[17:25] M**
would never forsake a friend.
**[17:28] YY**
I understand.
**[17:30] YY**
I'm partly responsible for
what happened to him, too.
**[17:33] YY**
Let's make sure we
get that choker off him!
**[17:37] M**
There's no telling what awful
things he'll have you do.
**[17:40] YY**
I-It's okay, as long as I'm with you!
**[17:43] YY**
N-Now, I didn't mean anything by that!
**[17:55] K**
Thanks, everyone.
**[17:56] K**
I had a great time.
**[18:00] M**
Uh... Do you have any more terrible
commands, like yesterday?
**[18:04] K**
It's fine.
**[18:06] K**
Thanks for indulging me.
**[18:08] K**
I'm really grateful.
**[18:10] D**
A-All I did was exercise and wash myself!
**[18:14] D**
You could always give me nastier... orders?
**[18:19] K**
I have lived a very shameful life.
**[18:22] K**
Living every moment for your desires
leaves nothing but emptiness.
**[18:27] M**
Do scumbags lose the will to live
once all their desires are sated?
**[18:33] K**
Once I'm dead, you can have this tracksuit.
**[18:36] K**
Let it be the proof that
I lived in this world.
**[18:40] A**
H-Hang on...
**[18:42] K**
Aqua.
**[18:46] K**
The yakisoba bun and bubbly you bought
**[18:49] K**
were very delicious.
**[19:03] W**
Kazuma-san...
**[19:05] M**
Kazuma...
**[19:06] W**
Kazuma-san...
**[19:07] D**
Kazuma...
**[19:18] A**
Don't die, Kazuma.
**[19:20] A**
We're going to bring down the
Devil King together, right?
**[19:23] M**
True...
**[19:25] W**
I won't let you die!
**[19:28] W**
Please... You can ask for anything!
**[19:33] K**
* This is what it feels*
* like to be comforted?*
**[19:43] K**
I see.
**[19:44] K**
Then, since it's the end, there are
some things I'd like to apologize for.
**[19:49] K**
Megumin...
**[19:51] K**
When I would carry you home
after you used explosion magic,
**[19:55] K**
I tried to get a feel for your
breasts as much as possible
**[19:58] K**
by shaking you around and
changing my posture a lot.
**[20:02] K**
I'm sorry.
**[20:04] K**
Yunyun, Wiz...
**[20:06] K**
If I'm being honest,
whenever I talk with you two,
**[20:08] K**
my line of sight is fixed on your chests.
**[20:11] K**
Wiz has so much to look at,
**[20:13] K**
and Yunyun's outfit is so
sexy around the chest.
**[20:15] K**
And I actually thought it was your
fault, for having bodies like that.
**[20:20] K**
I'm sorry.
**[20:21] K**
Darkness...
**[20:23] K**
Since we started living together here,
**[20:25] K**
all I've really seen you as is boobs.
**[20:28] K**
You are boobs.
**[20:30] K**
Boobs.
**[20:32] K**
Sorry.
**[20:34] A**
You're going to spout some heresy
about a goddess like me, too?
**[20:38] K**
Aqua, when we were sleeping
in the horse stables...
**[20:46] (Flashback) A**
I can't eat another bite...
**[20:49] K**
I tried desperately to see you as some kind
of love interest, but I just couldn't do it.
**[20:55] K**
I'm sorry.
**[20:57] A**
Don't give up so easily, Kazuma-san!
**[20:59] A**
Don't give up!
**[21:01] A**
Please, I'm begging you!
**[21:03] K**
I have no regrets left.
**[21:05] K**
Thank you all for everything.
**[21:12] K**
Huh? Why?
**[21:17] (Flashback) K**
I could really go for some comfort.
**[21:20] K**
*My wish... was to be comforted?*
**[21:29] K**
* Uh, everyone, that's the*
* look you save for garbage.*
**[21:32] A**
Hey, crappy NEET.
**[21:35] A**
Why don't you try putting
this choker on again?
**[21:38] A**
It's okay. Your kind friends
are sure to help you out.
**[21:56] E**
Well...
**[21:57] E**
Can I just say one thing?
**[22:00] K**
Go ahead.
**[22:03] E**
Try not to die over something as silly as this.
**[22:07] K**
I have no excuse!
# Season 2
# E1 - Give Me Deliverance from this Judicial Injustice!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRE5JNZP6/give-me-deliverance-from-this-judicial-injustice)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Please enter your resurrection spell.
***SIGN*** Enter
***SIGN*** KAZUMASREALLYTHEBESTKONOSUBACHARACTER
***SIGN*** The spell is incorrect. Your quest book has been erased.
***SIGN*** Enter
***SIGN*** GODSBLESSINGSONTHISWONDERFULWORLD TWO
**[00:14] Kazuma**
*My name is Satou Kazuma...*
**[00:16] Kazuma**
* A foreigner from a distant land,*
* fated to battle the Devil King.*
**[00:19] Kazuma**
* Guided by a goddess of fate,*
* I was reincarnated in another world...*
**[00:23] Kazuma**
* An unfamiliar world swirling*
* with destruction and chaos.*
**[00:26] Kazuma**
* But I have allies that*
* I share strong bonds with.*
**[00:28] Kazuma**
* The ultimate wizard, a*
* noble and beautiful knight,*
**[00:31] Kazuma**
* and a magnanimous goddess who*
* willingly came to my aid.*
**[00:35] Kazuma**
*The gears of fate now begin to turn.*
**[00:37] Kazuma**
*In order to save this wonderful world,*
**[00:40] Kazuma**
*our adventure now begins once again!*
**[00:43] Sena**
You're coming with me!
**[01:02] Kazuma**
Wait, no!
***SIGN*** Episode 1 Give Me Deliverance From This Judicial Injustice!
**[01:05] Kazuma**
I wanna go home...
**[01:07] Kazuma**
I just want to go back to Japan.
**[01:10] (Flashback) Sena**
I'm Sena, the public prosecutor
assigned by the kingdom.
**[01:13] (Flashback) Sena**
Adventurer Satou Kazuma,
**[01:15] (Flashback) Sena**
you are currently suspected of
the crime of subversion to the state.
**[01:18] (Flashback) Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma, what did you do this time?!
**[01:21] (Flashback) Aqua**
Come on, apologize!
**[01:23] (Flashback) Aqua**
I'll tell them I'm sorry, too,
so hurry up and apologize!
**[01:27] (Flashback) Kazuma**
What do you mean, "this time"?!
**[01:28] (Flashback) Kazuma**
You should know I didn't do anything!
**[01:31] (Flashback) Sena**
The coronatite that was
teleported at your instruction
**[01:33] (Flashback) Sena**
blew up the residence of a lord.
**[01:37] (Flashback) Sena**
Thankfully, there were no fatalities...
**[01:39] (Flashback) Sena**
But there is the question of whether you are
a terrorist, or a servant of the Devil King.
**[01:44] (Flashback) Megumin**
Wait a minute, please.
**[01:46] (Flashback) Megumin**
If not for Kazuma, there could've been
worse casualties in the Destroyer battle.
**[01:52] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Megumin...
**[01:53] (Flashback) Megumin**
The only crimes Kazuma commits are
minor ones, like sexual harassment.
**[01:57] (Flashback) Darkness**
Miss Prosecutor, this must be some mistake.
**[02:00] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Darkness...
**[02:01] (Flashback) Darkness**
This man lacks the guts for such an act.
**[02:03] (Flashback) Darkness**
Despite eyeing me like a
wild animal in the mansion,
**[02:07] (Flashback) Darkness**
he is the kind of sadsack who
never once came to my bedside.
**[02:10] (Flashback) Kazuma**
I-I-I wasn't eyeing anything!
**[02:12] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Don't get a big head just because
your body's somewhat sexy!
**[02:15] (Flashback) Kazuma**
I reserve the right to be selective!
**[02:17] (Flashback) Darkness**
Wh-Why, you... And after everything
you made me do in the bath!
**[02:21] (Flashback) Kazuma**
That was because I was under
that succubus's control!
**[02:24] (Flashback) Kazuma**
You're the one who went along
with it and washed my back!
**[02:27] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Just how easy are you?!
**[02:29] (Flashback) Darkness**
Th-Then you do remember, after all!
**[02:32] (Flashback) (Kazuma**
Maybe I do!
**[02:32] (Flashback) (Kazuma**
And as a Crusader who serves Eris-sama,
my body must remain pure!
**[02:37] (Flashback) (Kazuma**
And you call me easy...
**[02:39] (Flashback) (Kazuma**
Yep!
**[02:39] (Flashback) (Kazuma**
I'll kill you dead!
**[02:41] (Flashback) (Kazuma**
Do it, then!
**[02:41] (Flashback) Dust**
That's right!
**[02:42] (Flashback) Dust**
Kazuma might be an adventurer,
but he's no criminal!
**[02:45] (Flashback) Crowd**
This is abuse of state power!
**[02:47] (Flashback) Crowd**
Adventurers deserve freedom!
**[02:49] (Flashback) Crowd**
Freedom! Freedom! Freedom! Freedom!
**[02:53] (Flashback) Sena**
Incidentally, he's not the only one
the subversion charge may apply to.
**[02:58] (Flashback) Sena**
I won't stop anyone who wants
to join him in prison, but...
**[03:05] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Screw you guys! Try harder!
Keep the protest going!
**[03:08] (Flashback) Aqua**
If I remember right, Kazuma said
something like this at the time.
**[03:11] (Flashback) Aqua**
"It's okay. I'll take responsibility."
**[03:13] (Flashback) Aqua**
"I may not look it, but I
apparently have good luck!"
**[03:17] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Wait, hang on...
**[03:19] (Flashback) Megumin**
If...
**[03:20] (Flashback) Kazuma**
If?!
**[03:20] (Flashback) Megumin**
If I had been there at the time,
**[03:23] (Flashback) Megumin**
I'm sure I could've stopped Kazuma!
**[03:25] (Flashback) Megumin**
But since I wasn't there,
there's nothing I could have done!
**[03:28] (Flashback) Megumin**
Nope, nothing at all!
**[03:30] (Flashback) Kazuma**
You people...
**[03:32] (Flashback) Darkness**
Wait. Th-That's right.
**[03:34] (Flashback) Darkness**
I was the one who did it!
**[03:35] (Flashback) Darkness**
It was my command!
**[03:37] (Flashback) Darkness**
So please, let me enjoy
this imprisonment play...
**[03:38] (Flashback) Darkness**
No, let me bear the intensity
of this punishment!
**[03:41] (Flashback) Sena**
Excuse me? I was told you were
trying to act as a meatshield.
**[03:44] (Flashback) Darkness**
Meat—
**[03:46] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Wow, haven't seen that in a while.
**[03:48] (Flashback) Quiz**
Uh, the Teleport spell was cast by—
**[03:51] (Flashback) Aqua**
Don't, Wiz!
**[03:52] (Flashback) Wiz**
Aqua-sama?!
**[03:52] (Flashback) Aqua**
If only one of us has to take the
fall here, that's for the best!
**[03:55] (Flashback) Aqua**
It might be hard, but suck it up!
**[03:57] (Flashback) Aqua**
Suck it up for now!
**[04:00] (Flashback) Aqua**
We'll just wait until Kazuma
finishes doing his time!
**[04:03] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Don't make it sound like I
have to get sent to prison!
**[04:06] (Flashback) Kazuma**
And besides, even if you
guys don't back me up,
**[04:08] (Flashback) Kazuma**
my friends at the Guild are by my side!
**[04:18] (Flashback) ---**
Er, um...
**[04:19] (Flashback) Luna**
Oh, look at the dust...
**[04:23] (Flashback) Sena**
You're coming with me!
**[04:26] Kazuma**
Damn it... So much for the town where
new adventurers get their start.
**[04:30] Kazuma**
If this was a game,
**[04:31] Kazuma**
one of those cliché resistance armies
would come and rescue me...
**[04:40] Kazuma**
What the?
**[04:41] Aqua**
Kazuma! Kazuma!
**[04:43] Kazuma**
Aqua?
**[04:45] Kazuma**
What are you doing here?!
**[04:47] Aqua**
I came to save you, obviously!
**[04:49] Aqua**
I'd never abandon a dear friend.
**[04:52] Kazuma**
Why not defend me in the first place, then?
**[04:54] Aqua**
Megumin just used her explosion
magic on the outskirts of town.
**[04:58] Aqua**
Thanks to that, the guards
ran off to investigate!
**[05:01] Aqua**
Darkness should be running away with
the depleted Megumin as we speak.
**[05:07] Kazuma**
But won't I be making
things worse by running?
**[05:11] Aqua**
I hear you can be executed
for subversive activities.
**[05:15] Aqua**
You're just an adventurer
whose identity is suspect.
**[05:16] Aqua**
They'll manipulate the truth,
and you'll end up dead!
**[05:19] Kazuma**
* This parallel world really does have the*
* cultural level of the Middle Ages...*
**[05:24] Kazuma**
But how do I even get out of here?
**[05:32] Aqua**
First, use that wire to pick the cell's lock.
**[05:35] Aqua**
After that, you can use your
Stealth skill to escape the jail!
**[05:39] Aqua**
Then, once we get back to the mansion,
we get ready to skip town!
**[05:43] Aqua**
Well, I'll be waiting out front!
**[05:52] Kazuma**
*It's a combination lock...*
**[05:54] Kazuma**
Out!
**[05:56] Kazuma**
Guess I'll sleep.
**[06:10] Aqua**
Kazuma! Hey, Kazuma, wake up!
**[06:14] Kazuma**
You're here again?
**[06:16] Kazuma**
What happened yesterday?
Is everybody okay?
**[06:20] Kazuma**
The other two made it back
without being spotted,
**[06:22] Kazuma**
but they were accused of being
behind the explosion.
**[06:25] (Kazuma**
Were they, now?
**[06:26] (Kazuma**
We shouldn't underestimate this
world's investigative ability.
**[06:28] (Kazuma**
I dunno about that...
**[06:29] (Kazuma**
But it's okay.
**[06:30] (Kazuma**
What is?
**[06:30] (Kazuma**
I forced them to wear masks today,
so they won't be found out!
**[06:35] Kazuma**
*The problem is the explosion magic.*
**[06:38] Aqua**
More importantly, I waited all night
for you. Why didn't you escape?
**[06:42] Aqua**
Snow accumulated on my head,
**[06:44] Aqua**
and they kept dragging me in for questioning!
**[06:46] Kazuma**
The lock uses a combination.
**[06:49] Aqua**
That's clever of them.
**[06:50] Aqua**
I never imagined they'd have such foolproof
measures in place to prevent escape.
**[06:54] Aqua**
But today I've got the perfect solution!
**[06:57] Kazuma**
*A hacksaw?*
**[06:59] Kazuma**
You're gonna cut the bars with that?
**[07:00] Aqua**
Very astute of you!
**[07:02] Aqua**
We don't have much time,
so let's work together.
**[07:05] Aqua**
Hurry it up!
**[07:10] Kazuma**
Except I can't reach up there.
**[07:12] Aqua**
Not a problem. I'm not stupid, you know.
**[07:15] Aqua**
I brought something for you to stand on, too!
**[07:18] Kazuma**
*Eureka.*
**[07:20] Kazuma**
And how will you get it in here?
**[07:24] Aqua**
Hang on a second.
**[07:32] Aqua**
You've got it all wrong!
**[07:33] Aqua**
Kazuma needs this, so I was
just giving him a present...
**[07:36] Jailer**
Never heard of a stepping
box for a present before.
**[07:39] Jailer**
And what are you doing here at this hour?
**[07:41] Jailer**
Weren't you wandering around yesterday, too?
**[07:42] Kazuma**
Maybe I should learn from how
optimistic that idiot is.
**[07:47] Kazuma**
Out!
**[07:49] Kazuma**
Guess I'll sleep.
**[08:00] Sena**
Do you know what this is?
**[08:02] Sena**
It's a magical item that
lets us see through lies.
**[08:06] Sena**
First off, where are you from,
**[08:08] Sena**
and what did you do before
you became an adventurer?
**[08:11] Kazuma**
* They started off with a*
* hard-to-answer question.*
**[08:14] Kazuma**
I'm from Japan. I was a student there.
**[08:19] Kazuma**
Why'd it go off?!
**[08:22] Sena**
Where are you from, and what did you do there?
**[08:28] Kazuma**
Hang on!
**[08:29] Kazuma**
I wasn't really lying!
**[08:34] Kazuma**
I am from Japan.
**[08:37] Kazuma**
But I stayed home all day, every day,
living a life of self-indulgence.
**[08:45] Sena**
Why pretend to be a student?
**[08:47] Kazuma**
I wasn't really pretending...
**[08:51] Kazuma**
Oh, never mind.
**[08:52] Kazuma**
*Damn it, I hate this thing!*
**[08:55] Sena**
I've never heard of a
place called Japan before.
**[08:59] Sena**
So, what's your motive for
becoming an adventurer?
**[09:02] Kazuma**
To save the people who were being
oppressed by the Devil King—
**[09:10] Kazuma**
I thought being an adventurer seemed cool,
**[09:12] Kazuma**
a fun way to make a lot of money,
**[09:14] Kazuma**
and a great way to make
pretty girls fall all over me.
**[09:20] Sena**
O-Okay. Well, next question.
**[09:23] Sena**
Did you have a grudge against the lord?
**[09:25] Sena**
I've heard that once you got into debt,
you complained about him regularly.
**[09:29] Kazuma**
The reward I received for the dullahan hunt
**[09:32] Kazuma**
took care of the debts I
owed for the town's repairs.
**[09:36] Kazuma**
Even if we were trying to protect it,
**[09:37] Kazuma**
destroying the town in the process makes
it a moot point. I understand that.
**[09:44] Kazuma**
That was actually the argument
I used to convince my friends.
**[09:49] Kazuma**
I personally felt something like,
**[09:50] Kazuma**
"This is how you treat the
hero who saved this town?!
**[09:53] Kazuma**
You all should die!"
**[09:56] Sena**
I-I see. Moving on...
**[09:59] Kazuma**
Uh, can I ask you something?
**[10:02] Kazuma**
Can we just get to the point?
**[10:04] Kazuma**
I know I'm repeating myself,
but I made that call to save the town.
**[10:12] Sena**
It seems I was wrong.
**[10:16] Sena**
I had only heard bad rumors about you, so...
**[10:19] Sena**
I apologize.
**[10:21] Kazuma**
*Oh, how nice.*
**[10:23] Kazuma**
* I guess the harsh treatment*
* was just for criminals...*
**[10:27] Kazuma**
Honestly, taking rumors
at face value like that!
**[10:31] Kazuma**
Makes you a bad prosecutor, doesn't it?
**[10:33] Sena**
I-I'm sorry...
**[10:35] Kazuma**
Do you know what I've accomplished?
**[10:37] Kazuma**
I contributed the most to our
subjugation of that dullahan!
**[10:40] Kazuma**
We beat the Destroyer thanks to the
amazing job I did as commander!
**[10:44] Kazuma**
And instead of getting any thanks,
I get accusations instead!
**[10:48] Sena**
S-Sorry about that!
**[10:50] Sena**
It's just that this is my job...
**[10:51] Sena**
And I do know of your
accomplishments, Satou-san.
**[10:54] Sena**
But...
**[10:55] Kazuma**
But?
**[10:56] Kazuma**
But what, exactly?!
**[10:58] Kazuma**
Also, even after I'm cleared of suspicion,
**[11:00] Kazuma**
you guys still don't offer me any tea?
**[11:02] Kazuma**
I'd even take a pork cutlet bowl!
**[11:04] Sena**
P-Pork cutlet...?
**[11:06] Sena**
I'm sorry, we don't have
anything like that...
**[11:08] Sena**
I can get you some tea right away, though!
**[11:13] Kazuma**
It's lukewarm!
**[11:15] Kazuma**
Don't the prosecutors here
even know how to serve tea?!
**[11:17] Sena**
I-I'm sorry!
**[11:19] Kazuma**
I bet this gap between
that harsh attitude and
**[11:21] Kazuma**
how you are now means you don't
have a boyfriend, either.
**[11:24] Kazuma**
I may as well ask! Do you even have a man?
**[11:28] Sena**
I do not.
**[11:30] Sena**
Yes, I realize that my personality is
why I don't have any male companionship,
**[11:34] Sena**
in spite of my age.
**[11:36] Sena**
Are you satisfied?
**[11:38] Sena**
Please don't get too full of yourself.
**[11:42] Kazuma**
I'm sorry...
**[11:44] Sena**
Do you know what you're called around town?
**[11:47] ---**
Huh?
**[11:48] Sena**
"Crapuma" and "Kazutrash" and such.
**[11:50] Kazuma**
Th-That's horrible!
What jerks are calling me that?!
**[11:56] Sena**
Just for the record, I should ask...
**[11:58] Sena**
Do you truly have no connection
to the Devil King's army?
**[12:02] Sena**
No discourse with any of the
Devil King's leaders or anything?
**[12:05] Kazuma**
I have no such thing!
**[12:06] Kazuma**
Do I—
**[12:10] Kazuma**
Do I really look... like... that big a deal?
**[12:16] Kazuma**
* Crap! Wiz used to be a leader*
* in the Devil King's army!*
**[12:33] Judge**
We will now begin the trial
of the accused, Satou Kazuma.
**[12:52] Megumin**
You look really nervous.
**[12:54] Megumin**
It's okay. I'll counter that prosecutor's
arguments until she's in tears.
**[12:59] Darkness**
Worry not, Kazuma.
**[13:00] Darkness**
You haven't done anything wrong in this case.
**[13:04] Kazuma**
*That's reassuring.*
**[13:05] Kazuma**
*So reassuring... and yet...*
**[13:09] Aqua**
Hey, you can probably just leave it to me!
**[13:12] Kazuma**
*This one's the problem.*
**[13:17] Aqua**
Hey, hey, that guy seems to
have his eyes glued to us.
**[13:20] Darkness**
That is the lord in question, Aldarp.
**[13:25] Judge**
Prosecutor, step forward!
**[13:34] Sena**
A crime that threatens someone
with the station of lord
**[13:37] Sena**
is a threat to the nation itself.
**[13:40] Sena**
As such, the accused, Satou Kazuma, is
charged with subversion of the state's power.
***SIGN*** Witness Questioning
**[13:46] Sena**
Bring forth the witness!
**[13:50] Guys**
Chris!
**[13:52] Chris**
I guess they called me down for this.
***SIGN*** First Testimony
***SIGN*** Satou Kazuma's Underpants Hijacking
**[13:57] Sena**
So, Chris-san, he used Steal
on you in a public place
**[14:01] Sena**
and removed your underwear, correct?
**[14:05] Chris**
Uh... Well, that's correct, but that was...
**[14:08] Witness**
I saw it happen!
**[14:12] Witness**
I saw him swinging around that
girl's panties the street!
**[14:15] Sena**
Which man do you mean?
**[14:22] Sena**
I am satisfied with establishing
the truth of this evidence.
**[14:26] Sena**
Thank you very much.
***SIGN*** Second Testimony
***SIGN*** Satou Kazuma's Theft, Illegal Sale of a Magic Sword
**[14:31] Sena**
Mitsurugi Kyouya-san,
**[14:33] Sena**
your magic sword was stolen and
sold off by the accused, correct?
**[14:36] Mitsurugi**
W-Well, that's true.
**[14:38] Mitsurugi**
But I was the one who
issued the challenge, so—
**[14:41] Sena**
Thank you!
**[14:42] Mitsurugi**
Wait a sec—
***SIGN*** Third Testimony
***SIGN*** Satou Kazuma's Threats Against Women
**[14:46] Sena**
And you two, when you tried
to retrieve the magic sword,
**[14:49] Sena**
he threatened to remove your
underwear in public, did he not?
**[14:53] Fio**
That's right, he threatened us!
**[14:54] Fio**
He said he was an advocate
of true gender equality,
**[14:56] Fio**
so he had no problem with
dropkicking a female opponent!
**[14:59] Fio**
You coward!
**[15:00] Clemea**
It's true!
**[15:01] Clemea**
"I'll unleash my Steal ability
right here in public," he said!
**[15:05] Turban**
I saw it! He was doing this
creepy thing with his hands...
**[15:08] Turban**
It was really quite creepy!
**[15:12] Sena**
Thank you very much.
**[15:13] Crowd**
What a deviant.
**[15:14] Crowd**
That's horrible.
**[15:15] Crowd**
What trash.
**[15:17] Kazuma**
*This is bad!*
**[15:19] Kazuma**
*This is getting seriously bad now!*
**[15:22] Aldarp**
That's enough. Let's get
this execution on the road.
**[15:25] Megumin**
Objection!
**[15:26] Megumin**
I will admit that Kazuma
has a warped personality,
**[15:29] Megumin**
but all this testimony is
inadmissible as evidence!
**[15:33] Kazuma**
Megumin!
**[15:34] Megumin**
I demand some legitimate basis for
these accusations of terrorism!
**[15:38] Aqua**
Yeah! What're you basing it on?!
**[15:40] Sena**
The basis for the case? Very well.
**[15:42] Sena**
First!
**[15:44] Sena**
Even if it was to defeat a dullahan,
he damaged the town with a flood.
**[15:49] Sena**
Second!
**[15:51] Sena**
The use of explosion magic
in the vicinity of the town
**[15:53] Sena**
has altered the landscape and
ecosystem, on top of creating
**[15:57] Sena**
disruptive noise late at night!
**[16:01] Kazuma**
*My defense is doomed.*
**[16:03] Sena**
And third!
**[16:04] Sena**
An eyewitness report of the accused using a
skill known only by undead, Drain Touch!
**[16:11] Kazuma**
* Stay quiet! Exercise your*
* right to remain silent!*
**[16:14] Sena**
Covering your ears doesn't
mean that it didn't happen!
**[16:17] Sena**
The biggest reason to suspect you
**[16:19] Sena**
is the fact that you claimed to have
no connection the Devil King's army.
**[16:22] Sena**
At that time, the magic
lie detector went off!
**[16:26] Sena**
Is that not sufficient evidence?
**[16:31] Aqua**
It's over, it's all over!
Kazuma's a convict now!
**[16:35] Kazuma**
Oh, God! What do I do?!
**[16:37] (Aqua**
Even though he was just
a shut-in NEET at first!
**[16:38] Adarp**
That's enough!
**[16:39] Adarp**
There no denying he's connected
to the Devil King's army!
**[16:40] (Aqua**
But first he becomes more
and more of a pervert,
**[16:43] (Aqua**
and now he's a criminal!
**[16:44] Kazuma**
*Thanks, old man.*
**[16:46] Kazuma**
*This is my chance!*
**[16:47] Aldarp**
He sent explosives into my mansion!
**[16:51] Aldarp**
Execute him immediately!
**[16:52] Kazuma**
Wrong!
**[16:54] Kazuma**
I have no connections to the Devil King's army,
**[16:56] Kazuma**
and I'm no terrorist!
**[16:58] Sena**
What point does this serve now?
**[16:59] Sena**
Your testimony was proven
wrong, on the record!
**[17:03] Kazuma**
All right, listen up!
**[17:05] Kazuma**
I'm gonna say it!
**[17:06] Kazuma**
I...
**[17:08] Kazuma**
do not work for the Devil King's
army, nor am I a terrorist!
**[17:17] Sena**
That can't be!
**[17:19] Sena**
Your honor?
**[17:21] Judge**
Given the circumstances,
**[17:22] Judge**
the prosecution's basis for this case
can no longer be seen as valid.
**[17:32] Judge**
Therefore, the accused, Satou Kazuma,
**[17:34] Judge**
with no sufficient basis to suspect
you, I judge you innocent—
**[17:38] Adarp**
No, Judge.
**[17:40] Judge**
Lord Aldarp?
**[17:42] Adarp**
Are you trying to embarrass me?
**[17:48] Kazuma**
What the hell?! That's playing dirty!
**[17:50] Aldarp**
You're nothing but an adventurer!
**[17:53] Kazuma**
*Stupid Middle Ages...*
**[17:56] Judge**
The defendant... is guilty.
**[17:58] Judge**
His sentence...
**[18:00] Judge**
is death.
**[18:01] Kazuma**
That's not right!
**[18:06] Darkness**
Your honor, will you hear me out?
**[18:12] Kazuma**
Darkness?
**[18:16] Judge**
That's...
**[18:17] Judge**
The Dustiness family crest!
**[18:22] Luna**
The Dustiness family?
**[18:23] Wiz**
They're said to be the king's
greatest allies! They're famous!
**[18:27] Ruffian**
I knew something was up with that gal...
**[18:32] Ruffian**
But I never imagined this.
**[18:33] Kazuma**
And after I kept quiet about it for you...
**[18:36] Darkness**
He's a sly one.
**[18:38] Darkness**
Nothing short of this would've
prevented your execution.
**[18:42] Darkness**
Would you let me handle this trial?
**[18:47] Darkness**
I am not asking for it to be canceled.
**[18:50] Darkness**
With time, I can prove this man's innocence.
**[18:55] Adarp**
I don't care how much authority
the Dustiness family wields...
**[18:58] Darkness**
I would owe you for this.
**[19:01] Darkness**
That being the case,
I will do anything you ask.
**[19:08] Aldarp**
Anything?
**[19:09] Darkness**
Yes, anything.
**[19:11] Crowd**
Darkness-san...
**[19:12] Crowd**
Darkness...
**[19:14] Thedol**
Th-That's right!
Kazuma didn't do anything wrong!
**[19:16] Garil**
He even gave me a coupon!
**[19:18] Dust**
This trial's a load of crap!
**[19:20] Dust**
Kazuma! Kazuma!
**[19:22] Crowd**
Kazuma! Kazuma! Kazuma! Kazuma!
**[19:27] Judge**
Order! Order!
**[19:33] Judge**
Order, please!
**[19:35] Judge**
I'm telling you people to pipe down, damn it!
**[19:39] Judge**
KO! NO! SU! BA!
**[19:41] Judge**
Ahem...
**[19:43] Judge**
A request from none other than a
daughter of the Dustiness family.
**[19:46] Judge**
I will believe your words.
**[19:49] Judge**
The accused, Satou Kazuma,
will be given a stay of trial!
**[19:55] Aqua**
This is great, Kazuma!
**[19:57] Aqua**
I don't really get why, but you're not
getting executed, and that's a good thing!
**[20:00] Aqua**
Hup! A celebratory Nature's Beauty!
**[20:04] Megumin**
It seems my wit and arguments bore fruit.
**[20:07] Kazuma**
You guys gave up with hardly any resistance.
***SIGN*** Satou Kazuma is given a stay of trial.
Remains under surveillance as a suspect.
**[20:18] Kazuma**
For once, I really have to be grateful.
**[20:21] Darkness**
You can't rest easy yet.
**[20:23] Darkness**
But leave Aldarp to me.
**[20:25] Kazuma**
Will you be okay?
**[20:26] Kazuma**
That old dude was giving you a nasty look.
**[20:29] Kazuma**
Are you sure he won't
demand something crazy?
**[20:32] Darkness**
S-Something crazy...
**[20:36] Kazuma**
I want a refund for my concern.
**[20:37] Darkness**
No, it'll be fine.
**[20:41] Darkness**
I'll be taking my leave now.
**[20:48] Kazuma**
Lalatina.
**[20:49] Darkness**
Do not call me that!
**[20:58] Kazuma**
*I have two missions now.*
**[21:00] Kazuma**
* First, to prove that I'm not a*
* member of the Devil King's forces.*
**[21:04] Kazuma**
* The second is to reimburse*
* the lord for his damages.*
**[21:08] Kazuma**
* It might not be fair, but after what*
* Darkness did to save me, it must be done.*
**[21:14] Kazuma**
*As of now, my adventure*
**[21:16] Kazuma**
*enters its second chapter!*
**[21:21] Soldiers**
The court has ordered
**[21:23] Soldiers**
that the suspect's personal assets
be seized to pay back his debt!
**[21:52] Kazuma**
*My adventure's...*
**[21:54] Kazuma**
*second chapter... starts now...*
***SIGN*** Suspect Kazuma's
***SIGN*** Total Debt
***SIGN*** 1,240,000 Eris
***SIGN*** Mom, Dad, it's been a while. I'm currently in a really tough position. I'm facing a lot of questions about my choices as an adventurer, and as a human being. But when I think about the people who are close to me, I think I can endure anything. I think I'm a guy who can get things done, when it comes down to it. I used to always say that one day I would do something big. ...No, I don't mean anything criminal!
***SIGN*** Episode 2
***SIGN*** A Friend for This Crimson Demon Girl!
**[23:31] Kazuma**
Mom, Dad, it's been a while.
**[23:34] Kazuma**
I'm currently in a really tough position.
**[23:37] Kazuma**
I'm facing a lot of questions about my
choices as an adventurer, and as a huma—
# E2 - A Friend For This Crimson Demon Girl!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6P8G7GW6/a-friend-for-this-crimson-demon-girl)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Aqua**
Achoo!
**[00:03] Aqua**
Cold... I'm so cold...
**[00:06] Aqua**
Warm me up... Somebody warm me up...
**[00:12] Aqua**
What's wrong with you?!
**[00:14] Kazuma**
Don't you get it?!
**[00:15] Kazuma**
Darkness went to deal with that lord
last night and never came back!
**[00:19] Kazuma**
She's probably...
**[00:27] Kazuma**
Megumin?
**[00:28] Kazuma**
What's with the cat?
**[00:30] Megumin**
I doubt she'll cause much trouble, so...
**[00:33] Kazuma**
You want to keep her?
**[00:34] Megumin**
Is that all right?
**[00:37] ---**
Ow!
**[00:38] Aqua**
Hey, why'd she only scratch me?!
**[00:41] Aqua**
Unbelievable!
**[00:42] Aqua**
Between the jet black fur
and the imperious attitude,
**[00:45] Aqua**
I can sense some sort of malevolent aura!
**[00:48] Aqua**
So, what do you call this demonic beast?
**[00:51] Megumin**
Chomusuke.
**[00:54] Kazuma**
What'd you—
**[00:54] Megumin**
She's Chomusuke.
**[00:58] Megumin**
Anyway, what were the two
of you making a fuss about?
**[01:01] Kazuma**
How can you be so calm?
**[01:03] Kazuma**
As we speak, Darkness might be...
**[01:04] Megumin**
There may be unsavory rumors about that lord,
**[01:07] Megumin**
but I doubt Darkness could easily be—
**[01:09] Kazuma**
That's the problem with children!
**[01:10] Kazuma**
You still don't understand
that deviant at all!
**[01:16] Darkness**
You can do what you want with my body...
**[01:18] Kazuma**
"But don't think you'll have
your way with my heart!"
**[01:21] Kazuma**
She's sure to say something like that.
**[01:24] Megumin**
Wh-Wh-What should we do?!
**[01:26] Megumin**
Darkness is in grave danger!
**[01:27] Megumin**
What should we do, Kazuma?!
**[01:29] Kazuma**
It's too late.
**[01:30] Kazuma**
Listen up. When she gets back,
**[01:32] Kazuma**
just be as nice to her as you normally would.
**[01:35] Aqua**
I-I get it!
**[01:36] Aqua**
So we can't ask Darkness what it was
like to climb the stairs to adulthood!
**[01:42] Megumin**
Darkness... Darkness, she's...
**[01:42] Sena**
Satou Kazuma!
**[01:43] Sena**
Is Satou Kazuma here?!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! 2
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Defeat the monsters in the vicinity of Axel
**[03:24] Aqua**
No!
**[03:30] Kazuma**
*While they were trying to spring me,*
***SIGN*** Episode 2 A Friend for This Crimson Demon Girl!
**[03:32] Kazuma**
*Megumin had cast her explosion
magic all over the place.*
**[03:35] Kazuma**
* Thanks to that, the Giant Toads that*
* had been hibernating woke up early.*
**[03:36] (Aqua**
Help!
**[03:39] Kazuma**
*So, we're here to clean up her mess, but...*
**[03:41] Aqua**
No!
**[03:43] Aqua**
I don't wanna be toad food again!
**[03:46] Kazuma**
The toads haven't slowed
down, despite the cold...
**[03:50] Kazuma**
Aren't they a little too hardy?
**[03:51] Megumin**
We will not be outdone!
**[03:54] Megumin**
We must get much, much
stronger in order to survive
**[03:59] Megumin**
in this cruel world.
**[04:00] Kazuma**
I'll get you out—
**[04:01] Megumin**
No, please, help Aqua first.
**[04:03] Megumin**
It's cold outside, but it's quite
warm inside this toad.
**[04:08] Megumin**
Having already cast my explosion magic,
**[04:11] Megumin**
all I can do is slow this one down.
**[04:13] Kazuma**
O-Okay, I'll leave you to it.
**[04:16] Sena**
Is that a good idea?!
**[04:17] Aqua**
Kazuma-san!
**[04:18] Aqua**
I can't! I just can't!
**[04:20] Aqua**
Hurry and do something!
**[04:24] Kazuma**
* Even with Darkness to act as*
* a sturdy wall for our party,*
**[04:28] Kazuma**
*none of us had an effective ranged attack.*
**[04:31] Kazuma**
* In light of that, I decided*
* to learn a new skill.*
**[04:34] Kazuma**
*And it's called...*
**[04:35] Kazuma**
*Snipe!*
**[04:38] Kazuma**
* The Snipe skill has higher accuracy*
* the higher your luck stat is.*
**[04:42] Kazuma**
*It's a perfect fit for me!*
**[04:44] Aqua**
Kazuma-san...
**[04:54] Aqua**
Hey! That arrow almost messed
up the best part of my hair—
**[05:00] Kazuma**
Aqua!
**[05:04] Kazuma**
KONOSUBA!
**[05:10] Kazuma**
My skill... My skill...
**[05:12] Sena**
A-Are you people always like this?
**[05:15] Megumin**
W-Wait a moment!
**[05:17] Megumin**
The toads!
**[05:20] Kazuma**
This is bad! Now there's not enough bai—
**[05:22] Kazuma**
I mean, enough decoys to keep them occupied!
**[05:26] Kazuma**
Aqua, you should still be
keeping them occupied!
**[05:28] Aqua**
No way! You be the decoy this time!
**[05:30] Kazuma**
Stupid! You don't have enough
attack power to beat these toads!
**[05:34] Kazuma**
If we can beat even one of them,
that'd leave just two!
**[05:36] Kazuma**
Then you and Sena-san can
keep them busy together!
**[05:39] Sena**
I'm just here to supervise you all,
not to get dragged into—
**[05:47] Aqua**
Kazuma, there's your chance!
**[05:49] Aqua**
Hurry and get the toa—
**[05:51] Aqua**
No!
**[05:54] Kazuma**
You guys!
**[05:56] Megumin**
Excuse me, but I think I'm
slowly being swallowed.
**[05:59] Megumin**
Could you rescue me now, please?
**[06:03] Kazuma**
Aw, damn it!
**[06:04] Kazuma**
If only Darkness were here!
**[06:21] Kazuma**
We're doomed!
**[06:23] Yunyun**
Light of Saber!
**[06:43] Yunyun**
KONOSUBA!
**[06:45] Kazuma**
*I honestly don't want to touch them...*
**[06:50] Kazuma**
You should be able to walk now.
**[06:51] Kazuma**
I don't know who you are, but thanks.
**[06:55] Yunyun**
I-I wasn't trying to save you.
**[06:58] Yunyun**
If my rival had been eaten by
a toad, I'd look ridiculous...
**[07:04] Kazuma**
Rival?
**[07:08] Yunyun**
I-It's been a long time, Megumin!
**[07:10] Yunyun**
Today is the day we finally
settle our long-standing score!
**[07:14] Megumin**
Who might you be, exactly?
**[07:16] Megumin**
I mean, it's strange that
you never gave your name.
**[07:21] Megumin**
This must be one of those "Hey, it's me!"
scams that Kazuma described before.
**[07:25] Yunyun**
F-Fine, then!
**[07:27] Yunyun**
It's embarrassing to do this
in front of strangers, but...
**[07:32] Yunyun**
My name is Yunyun!
**[07:33] Yunyun**
An arch wizard and master
of advanced magic!
**[07:37] Yunyun**
She who will one day lead the Crimson Demons!
**[07:40] Megumin**
Anyway, this is Yunyun.
**[07:42] Megumin**
Daughter of the Crimson Demons' leader,
and my self-proclaimed rival.
**[07:46] Yunyun**
So you *did* remember!
**[07:47] Kazuma**
I see. Well, I'm one of her
adventuring friends, Kazuma.
**[07:51] Kazuma**
Nice to meet you, Yunyun.
**[07:53] Yunyun**
H-Huh?
**[07:54] Yunyun**
You're not laughing at my name?
**[07:58] Kazuma**
Well, y'know, in this world of ours,
**[07:59] Kazuma**
there are some who have weird
names in the first place,
**[08:02] Kazuma**
but still end up with disgraceful
nicknames like "Crazy Exploding Girl."
**[08:06] Megumin**
You mean me? You're talking
about me, aren't you?!
**[08:09] Megumin**
How did that name attach itself to me
and I'm only now hearing about it?!
**[08:13] Yunyun**
I-Impressive, Megumin.
You've found good allies!
**[08:15] Kazuma**
Cut it out! Don't touch me!
**[08:17] Yunyun**
As befits my rival!
**[08:19] Yunyun**
I'll defeat you and become
first among the Crimson Demons!
**[08:23] Yunyun**
Now, Megumin, I challenge you to a duel!
**[08:26] Megumin**
I'd rather not. It's too cold.
**[08:29] Yunyun**
Why?!
**[08:30] Yunyun**
Please, fight me!
**[08:33] Megumin**
No, thank you.
**[08:34] Yunyun**
Please!
**[08:35] Yunyun**
One fight! Just once!
**[08:36] Sena**
You somehow managed today,
**[08:37] Megumin**
No.
**[08:38] Yunyun**
Then when can we have a duel?!
**[08:38] Sena**
but I'm not fully convinced this
wasn't just an act to deceive me.
**[08:41] Megumin**
How should I know?
**[08:41] Yunyun**
But why?! Megumin!
**[08:43] Sena**
Excuse me.
**[08:44] Aqua**
Well, I'll make arrangements for the
guild to haul the toad meat in.
**[08:44] Megumin**
I said no.
**[08:45] Yunyun**
Come on, Megumin! Just one little duel!
**[08:48] Megumin**
Not happening.
**[08:49] Kazuma**
* I don't really appreciate being left*
* on my own with these two...*
**[08:50] Yunyun**
Aw, come on, Megumin!
**[08:55] Megumin**
Very well, then.
**[08:58] Megumin**
I can no longer use my magic today,
**[09:00] Megumin**
so let's make it a contest in the martial arts
that you're supposed to be skilled at.
**[09:04] Yunyun**
Really?
**[09:05] Yunyun**
I mean, you barely attended
martial arts class at the academy...
**[09:10] Kazuma**
*Stare.*
**[09:10] Yunyun**
And every lunch period,
you'd show up like clockwork,
**[09:13] Kazuma**
*Stare...*
**[09:14] Yunyun**
challenge me to a duel,
and then steal my lunch...
**[09:16] Kazuma**
*Stare...*
**[09:19] Kazuma**
Girl...
**[09:20] Megumin**
It was a matter of life and death for me.
**[09:22] Megumin**
Due to personal circumstances, her lunches
were the only thing keeping me alive.
**[09:26] Yunyun**
All right, then that will be how we fight!
**[09:29] Kazuma**
Seriously?
**[09:30] Megumin**
Very well.
**[09:32] Megumin**
Now then, come at me as you will!
**[09:40] Kazuma**
* Judging from their builds, it looks*
* like Yunyun's gonna win this.*
**[09:43] Kazuma**
* I can't even begin to imagine Megumin*
* being any good at unarmed combat.*
**[09:51] Yunyun**
M-Megumin...
**[09:53] Yunyun**
Um, your body's still kind of shiny...
**[09:58] Megumin**
That's right.
**[09:59] Megumin**
What you see clinging to every inch of me
are the fluids from inside a toad's stomach.
**[10:04] Megumin**
Come! The moment you get close to me,
**[10:07] Megumin**
I'll grab you with both arms
**[10:08] Megumin**
and put you in a submission hold!
**[10:11] Yunyun**
N-No way!
**[10:13] Yunyun**
You're trying to make me lose my will
to fight so I'll give up, aren't you?
**[10:17] Yunyun**
Right?
**[10:20] Megumin**
We're friends, aren't we?
**[10:23] Megumin**
And I believe friendship means
sharing in each other's suffering.
**[10:27] Yunyun**
No!
**[10:28] Megumin**
C'mon. C'mon. C'mon.
**[10:31] Megumin**
C'mon! C'mon! C'mon!
**[10:31] Yunyun**
I give up! I'll give up!
**[10:33] Yunyun**
Stay away from me!
**[10:34] Megumin**
C'mon!
**[10:37] Yunyun**
I give up! I already gave up!
**[10:41] Megumin**
I win again!
**[10:45] Darkness**
S-Stop it!
**[10:47] Darkness**
Damn you!
**[10:49] Darkness**
K-Kill—
**[10:51] Kazuma**
She actually ran off crying.
**[10:54] Megumin**
Kazuma.
**[10:55] Megumin**
The spoils of war.
**[10:56] Megumin**
Sell it to start making your payments.
**[10:59] Kazuma**
Are you sure?
**[11:01] Megumin**
It is of no use to a grand sorceress
such as myself, who operates beyond
**[11:04] Megumin**
the bounds of society.
**[11:07] Kazuma**
Do you ever think about learning
skills other than explosion ma—
**[11:09] Megumin**
Never.
**[11:10] Kazuma**
Yeah, I figured.
**[11:14] Megumin**
What is it?
**[11:15] Kazuma**
I was just thinking that you're
prettier than that other girl.
**[11:20] Duck Girl**
Wait!
**[11:22] Megumin**
Well, thank you very much!
**[11:24] Megumin**
As thanks, let me give you a big hug!
**[11:26] Kazuma**
S-Stay away from me!
**[11:28] Megumin**
You should be happier.
**[11:30] Megumin**
Some people would pay money to
have a slimy girl all over them.
**[11:36] Kazuma**
You reek of toads!
**[11:40] Kazuma**
I never thought an embrace
could be so unpleasant...
**[11:44] Megumin**
Chomusuke!
**[11:45] Megumin**
Were you a good—
**[11:50] Kazuma**
Well, I'm off to the bath.
**[11:53] Kazuma**
What is it?
**[11:54] Megumin**
Surely you've heard of "ladies first"?
**[11:57] Kazuma**
I yearn for true gender equality.
**[12:00] Kazuma**
I have no patience for one who talks about
female privilege when it suits them,
**[12:03] Kazuma**
and then complains about someone
"not being a man" when it's convenient!
**[12:13] Kazuma**
Besides, if you want to be treated like
a lady, you should grow into one first!
**[12:18] Megumin**
You're treating me like a
child again, aren't you?!
**[12:20] Megumin**
For the record, I'm only
three years younger than you!
**[12:23] Kazuma**
Yet you seem like just a kid to me,
so you're wasting your time!
**[12:27] Megumin**
This guy's actually taking his clothes off!
**[12:29] Kazuma**
I'm not backing down on this one!
**[12:30] Kazuma**
No matter what! Get it?!
**[12:32] Kazuma**
If you do, then get out of here already!
**[12:35] Megumin**
I see. So you don't really
see me as a woman, then.
**[12:39] Megumin**
In that case, I may as well join you.
**[12:42] Kazuma**
True. Getting in together
will solve both our problems.
**[12:45] Megumin**
Wha?!
**[12:46] Megumin**
E-Excuse me, doesn't this usually
call for a response like,
**[12:48] Megumin**
"D-Dummy! I could never do that!"
**[12:50] Megumin**
And then bashfully allowing
me to use the bath first?
**[12:53] Kazuma**
Just so you know, I'm not
the type to go for clichés.
**[12:57] Kazuma**
Say, for instance, you were in love with me,
**[12:59] Kazuma**
and some other girl was making moves on me.
**[13:02] Kazuma**
If you were to, out of jealousy,
inflict some unjust violence on me,
**[13:05] Kazuma**
I would fight back with no hesitation.
**[13:07] Kazuma**
I'm a guy who does what he has to do!
**[13:09] Kazuma**
You'd do well to remember that!
**[13:13] Megumin**
I get the feeling your application of that
saying leaves something to be desired,
**[13:17] Megumin**
but all right, fine.
**[13:19] Kazuma**
So after provoking me like that,
you're not gonna join me?
**[13:21] Kazuma**
I'm surprised at your lack of resolve.
**[13:23] Megumin**
How dare you?!
**[13:24] Megumin**
You think I lack resolve?!
**[13:26] Megumin**
Yep.
**[13:26] Megumin**
Them's fighting words! Fine, I'll get in!
**[13:28] Megumin**
It's just a bath! I can do that!
**[13:29] Megumin**
Ouch!
**[13:30] Megumin**
Now, stop skulking behind that towel,
and and let's get in the bath!
**[13:31] Megumin**
Whoa, whoa, whoa! What are you doing?!
**[13:33] ---**
Stop, you idiot!
**[13:35] Kazuma**
Don't pull on it, you perv! Show a little shame!
**[13:37] Megumi**
Out with it!
**[13:44] Kazuma**
Hey.
**[13:45] Megumin**
Yes?
**[13:46] Kazuma**
I thought cats didn't like baths.
**[13:49] Megumin**
She likes to stay clean.
**[13:52] Kazuma**
Hey...
**[13:53] Megumin**
Yes?
**[13:54] Kazuma**
Is that other girl gonna be okay?
**[13:56] Megumin**
I'm sure I'll see her again.
**[13:58] Megumin**
She chases after me,
claiming to be my rival, after all.
**[14:02] Kazuma**
She's the same age as you, right?
**[14:04] Megumin**
Why don't you just come out and say what you
were thinking when you looked at me just now?
**[14:09] Kazuma**
I was thinking how everybody
matures at their own pace—
**[14:11] Megumin**
Darkness blacker than black
and darker than dark...
**[14:12] Kazuma**
Hey, cut that out!
**[14:13] Kazuma**
It's bad for my heart!
**[14:15] Megumin**
I'm sure that in another year or two,
**[14:17] Megumin**
I'll have a body that'll have
Yunyun crying for forgiveness...
**[14:22] Megumin**
I would appreciate it if you'd
stop staring so intently!
**[14:27] Kazuma**
Why are we in the bath together?
**[14:30] Megumin**
Why bring that up now?
**[14:31] Megumin**
Why would you suddenly come to your senses?!
**[14:35] Kazuma**
Well, I mean, anyone seeing
this would probably react—
**[14:39] Aqua**
I'm back!
**[14:41] Aqua**
Hey, I got the cash for the toad meat!
**[14:45] Kazuma**
Is it locked?!
**[14:46] Kazuma**
Did you lock the door to the bath?!
**[14:48] Megumin**
I-I didn't!
**[14:49] Megumin**
Wh-Wh-What do we do?!
**[14:51] Aqua**
Kazuma? Megumin? I'm back!
**[14:55] Aqua**
It'd be nice if someone would say something!
**[14:58] Aqua**
Huh? The bath?
**[15:00] Kazuma**
Freeze!
**[15:05] Kazuma**
Either I'm doomed, or my magic holds out!
**[15:06] Aqua**
Hey!
**[15:07] Aqua**
Anyone there?
**[15:09] Kazuma**
Hold out, magic power of mine!
**[15:12] Kazuma**
If Aqua sees us, it'll mean getting
called "Pedo-NEET" and "Lolimaniac"
**[15:15] Kazuma**
and other disgraceful nicknames!
**[15:21] Kazuma**
*I don't even have the strength to stand.*
**[15:25] Aqua**
Megumin, when you get out of
the bath, let's have lunch.
**[15:29] Aqua**
Actually, get out of there already.
**[15:30] Aqua**
I'm all slimy myself, y'know!
**[15:38] Megumin**
That was a close one. If things
had gone on much longer...
**[15:40] Kazuma**
I almost got branded a lolicon.
**[15:44] Kazuma**
Hey, Megumin.
**[15:45] Kazuma**
Sorry to ask, but I can't move,
so could you dry me off?
**[15:49] Megumin**
Hey.
**[15:50] Megumin**
Why don't you explain exactly why getting
into the bath with me makes you a lolicon?
**[15:57] Kazuma**
Hey, wait, stop it!
**[15:58] Kazuma**
What are you trying to do?!
You'll be branded a female pervert!
**[16:00] Kazuma**
Hey, A-Aqua!
**[16:01] Kazuma**
Aqua! The little girl is bullying me!
**[16:09] Aqua**
Pedo-NEET.
***SIGN*** 12 Giant Toads Killed
***SIGN*** Today's Results
**[16:18] Kazuma**
* The day after receiving*
* my disgraceful title,*
**[16:20] Kazuma**
* we dropped by Wiz's shop to figure*
* out what to do about my debt.*
**[16:25] Kazuma**
Hey!
**[16:26] Kazuma**
I'm looking to sell this.
**[16:30] Wiz**
She's here to—
**[16:30] Yunyun**
M-My name is Yunyun!
**[16:33] Yunyun**
What a coincidence!
**[16:35] Yunyun**
What a quirk of fate!
**[16:36] Yunyun**
To think that we would
have an encounter here!
**[16:38] Yunyun**
You truly are my lifelong rival!
**[16:41] Wiz**
She heard that you all
visit my store regularly
**[16:44] Wiz**
and has been waiting all morning.
**[16:45] Yunyun**
Wh-What are you saying, shopkeep?!
**[16:48] Yunyun**
I just came by to buy some magic items...
**[16:50] Yunyun**
U-Um, I'd like this!
**[16:52] Yunyun**
KONOSUBA!
**[16:55] Kazuma**
I see.
**[16:56] Kazuma**
You could've just come by the
mansion instead of doing all this.
**[17:00] Yunyun**
But I can't just visit someone's
home unannounced...
**[17:03] Megumin**
It's always half-measures with you.
**[17:05] Megumin**
That's why you can't make friends.
**[17:06] Aqua**
Is that true?
**[17:08] Megumin**
Yunyun is the rare Crimson Demon
who's embarrassed by her name.
**[17:11] Megumin**
She would usually eat lunch
alone at the academy.
**[17:14] Wiz**
Now, now.
**[17:14] Megumin**
And whenever I would cross her line of sight,
**[17:17] Megumin**
she'd gleefully challenge me over and over.
**[17:20] Yunyun**
I-It wasn't that bad!
**[17:22] Yunyun**
I did have some friends.
**[17:24] Megumin**
I can hardly believe what I'm hearing.
**[17:26] Megumin**
You had friends, Yunyun?
**[17:28] Yunyun**
Of course! Even I had friends!
**[17:31] Yunyun**
There was Funifura-san and Dodonko-san,
**[17:33] Yunyun**
who would always say, "We're friends, right?"
and I would treat them to lunch...
**[17:37] Kazuma**
Hey, stop!
**[17:38] Kazuma**
I don't want to hear any more!
**[17:40] Megumin**
Well, since I can only use explosion magic,
**[17:43] Megumin**
I would rather avoid magic duels.
**[17:46] Yunyun**
Would you learn some other magic already?
**[17:48] Yunyun**
You're bound to have unused
skill points, right?
**[17:51] Megumin**
Yes, I do.
**[17:53] Megumin**
And I intend to put them all into
"Explosion Magic Power Boost"
**[17:56] Megumin**
and "High-Speed Casting."
**[17:58] Yunyun**
Stupid! Why are you so obsessed
with explosion magic?!
**[18:01] Kazuma**
That's right, you tell her!
**[18:03] Yunyun**
You've always been this way, Megumin!
**[18:03] Aqua**
All this talk of duels...
For classmates, you guys sure are vicious.
**[18:06] Megumin**
Your lack of appreciation for explosion
magic makes you the crazy one.
**[18:09] Aqua**
Hey, hey.
**[18:10] Aqua**
Maybe this would be good?
**[18:12] Aqua**
"The friendship crystal."
**[18:14] Wiz**
Oh, only a seasoned magic user
can use that effectively.
**[18:19] Yunyun**
If you can use it well, can you make friends?
**[18:22] Wiz**
Well, yes.
**[18:24] Wiz**
I know! Why not try it?
**[18:26] Megumin**
I hardly see the need to make friends...
**[18:29] Yunyun**
Have you lost your nerve, Megumin?
**[18:32] Yunyun**
In other words,
**[18:33] Yunyun**
being able to use this more effectively
is proof of greater spell casting skill!
**[18:37] Yunyun**
I challenge you, Megumin!
**[18:39] Megumin**
If you insist, then I will demonstrate for you
**[18:42] Megumin**
the power of a true magic user!
**[18:45] Yunyun**
Today is the day we settle this score!
**[18:52] Wiz**
Just what I'd expect from Crimson Demons.
**[18:54] Yunyun**
Now, crystal, demonstrate your power!
**[18:57] Wiz**
The crystal's power is activating!
**[19:07] Wiz**
It's never projected this much before!
**[19:10] Wiz**
They both have incredible magic!
**[19:12] Kazuma**
What... is this?!
**[19:22] Kazuma**
Is she gathering bread crusts?
**[19:25] Aqua**
Wait a minute...
**[19:31] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Happy birthday!
**[19:34] Aqua**
Is she... by herself?
**[19:36] (Flashback) Farmer**
Dang it!
**[19:39] (Flashback) Komekko**
Onee-chan, you're amazing!
**[19:47] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Not bad! But how about this?!
**[19:52] (Flashback) Komekko**
You're so great!
**[20:04] (Flashback) Komekko**
Onee-chan, this is great!
**[20:07] (Flashback) Yunyun**
I wouldn't even mind a devil
for a friend at this point...
**[20:10] Kazuma**
She's working odd jobs to take
her "friends" out to eat?!
**[20:14] Aqua**
Wait, why is she...
**[20:16] Aqua**
eating a bug?
**[20:19] Megumin**
What is this?!
**[20:21] Yunyun**
Shopkeep, you said this crystal
would create friendship, right?!
**[20:23] Wiz**
This is a valued item that deepens
feelings of friendship and love
**[20:30] Wiz**
by exposing past embarrassment... actually...
**[20:34] Yunyun**
Megumin! Hey, Megumin!
**[20:36] Yunyun**
Is this going to make us friends?!
**[20:45] Yunyun**
KONOSUBA!
**[20:47] Wiz**
I'll just put that on your tab, Kazuma-san.
**[20:50] Kazuma**
Hang on. Megumin was the one who broke it.
**[20:52] Megumin**
Yunyun was the one who wanted to use it.
**[20:55] Megumin**
She'll pay.
**[20:56] Yunyun**
My duel... I finally got her to duel, and...
**[20:59] Megumin**
How long are you going to mope?
**[21:01] Yunyun**
But how do we know who won?
**[21:03] Yunyun**
Can we call it a draw?
**[21:06] Megumin**
I don't mind.
**[21:08] Megumin**
I'm not childish enough to be
competitive over games anymore.
**[21:12] Yunyun**
Come to think of it, didn't we used to
compete to see who would grow faster?
**[21:16] Yunyun**
If you think you're not childish anymore,
do you want to do that again?
**[21:20] Megumin**
That's not what I mean when
I talk about being childish.
**[21:25] Megumin**
After all, I'm...
**[21:30] Megumin**
in the kind of relationship with Kazuma
here where we bathe together.
**[21:34] Kazuma**
Hey!
**[21:35] Wiz**
Oh, my!
**[21:39] Kazuma**
Don't joke about that!
**[21:41] Kazuma**
Is this the mouth?!
**[21:41] Kazuma**
Is this the mouth trying to make
my reputation even worse?!
**[21:44] Yunyun**
I-I'll...
**[21:46] Yunyun**
I'll admit that I lost today!
**[21:51] Wiz**
Come again!
**[21:53] Aqua**
She's a lively girl.
**[21:54] Kazuma**
You are, too.
**[21:58] Megumin**
I win again!
***SIGN*** Episode 3
***SIGN*** Peace for the Master of This Labyrinth!
***SIGN*** Here is the progress report I said I would send. Mr. Kazuma seemed like a problem at first, but he's become a seasoned and formidable adventurer. Absolutely not the kind of person to sexually harass anyone or get into debt. My assessment of his character proves to be on point. Yes, I am a really capable goddess. I've even gained the respect of the construction bosses, so my daily wages have gone up. I think I can keep working it and my side jobs with the fake flowers and the milk cartons, at this rate. ...No, I don't just work part-time jobs!
**[23:31] Aqua**
Here is the progress report I said I would send.
**[23:33] Aqua**
Mr. Kazuma seemed like a problem at first,
**[23:35] Aqua**
but he's become a seasoned
and formidable adventurer.
**[23:39] Aqua**
Absolutely not the kind—
# E3 - Peace for the Master of This Labyrinth!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6P8G7GW6/a-friend-for-this-crimson-demon-girl)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] Aqua**
Achoo!
**[00:03] Aqua**
Cold... I'm so cold...
**[00:06] Aqua**
Warm me up... Somebody warm me up...
**[00:12] Aqua**
What's wrong with you?!
**[00:14] Kazuma**
Don't you get it?!
**[00:15] Kazuma**
Darkness went to deal with that lord
last night and never came back!
**[00:19] Kazuma**
She's probably...
**[00:27] Kazuma**
Megumin?
**[00:28] Kazuma**
What's with the cat?
**[00:30] Megumin**
I doubt she'll cause much trouble, so...
**[00:33] Kazuma**
You want to keep her?
**[00:34] Megumin**
Is that all right?
**[00:37] ---**
Ow!
**[00:38] Aqua**
Hey, why'd she only scratch me?!
**[00:41] Aqua**
Unbelievable!
**[00:42] Aqua**
Between the jet black fur
and the imperious attitude,
**[00:45] Aqua**
I can sense some sort of malevolent aura!
**[00:48] Aqua**
So, what do you call this demonic beast?
**[00:51] Megumin**
Chomusuke.
**[00:54] Kazuma**
What'd you—
**[00:54] Megumin**
She's Chomusuke.
**[00:58] Megumin**
Anyway, what were the two
of you making a fuss about?
**[01:01] Kazuma**
How can you be so calm?
**[01:03] Kazuma**
As we speak, Darkness might be...
**[01:04] Megumin**
There may be unsavory rumors about that lord,
**[01:07] Megumin**
but I doubt Darkness could easily be—
**[01:09] Kazuma**
That's the problem with children!
**[01:10] Kazuma**
You still don't understand
that deviant at all!
**[01:16] Darkness**
You can do what you want with my body...
**[01:18] Kazuma**
"But don't think you'll have
your way with my heart!"
**[01:21] Kazuma**
She's sure to say something like that.
**[01:24] Megumin**
Wh-Wh-What should we do?!
**[01:26] Megumin**
Darkness is in grave danger!
**[01:27] Megumin**
What should we do, Kazuma?!
**[01:29] Kazuma**
It's too late.
**[01:30] Kazuma**
Listen up. When she gets back,
**[01:32] Kazuma**
just be as nice to her as you normally would.
**[01:35] Aqua**
I-I get it!
**[01:36] Aqua**
So we can't ask Darkness what it was
like to climb the stairs to adulthood!
**[01:42] Megumin**
Darkness... Darkness, she's...
**[01:42] Sena**
Satou Kazuma!
**[01:43] Sena**
Is Satou Kazuma here?!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! 2
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Defeat the monsters in the vicinity of Axel
**[03:24] Aqua**
No!
**[03:30] Kazuma**
*While they were trying to spring me,*
***SIGN*** Episode 2 A Friend for This Crimson Demon Girl!
**[03:32] Kazuma**
*Megumin had cast her explosion
magic all over the place.*
**[03:35] Kazuma**
* Thanks to that, the Giant Toads that*
* had been hibernating woke up early.*
**[03:36] (Aqua**
Help!
**[03:39] Kazuma**
*So, we're here to clean up her mess, but...*
**[03:41] Aqua**
No!
**[03:43] Aqua**
I don't wanna be toad food again!
**[03:46] Kazuma**
The toads haven't slowed
down, despite the cold...
**[03:50] Kazuma**
Aren't they a little too hardy?
**[03:51] Megumin**
We will not be outdone!
**[03:54] Megumin**
We must get much, much
stronger in order to survive
**[03:59] Megumin**
in this cruel world.
**[04:00] Kazuma**
I'll get you out—
**[04:01] Megumin**
No, please, help Aqua first.
**[04:03] Megumin**
It's cold outside, but it's quite
warm inside this toad.
**[04:08] Megumin**
Having already cast my explosion magic,
**[04:11] Megumin**
all I can do is slow this one down.
**[04:13] Kazuma**
O-Okay, I'll leave you to it.
**[04:16] Sena**
Is that a good idea?!
**[04:17] Aqua**
Kazuma-san!
**[04:18] Aqua**
I can't! I just can't!
**[04:20] Aqua**
Hurry and do something!
**[04:24] Kazuma**
* Even with Darkness to act as*
* a sturdy wall for our party,*
**[04:28] Kazuma**
*none of us had an effective ranged attack.*
**[04:31] Kazuma**
* In light of that, I decided*
* to learn a new skill.*
**[04:34] Kazuma**
*And it's called...*
**[04:35] Kazuma**
*Snipe!*
**[04:38] Kazuma**
* The Snipe skill has higher accuracy*
* the higher your luck stat is.*
**[04:42] Kazuma**
*It's a perfect fit for me!*
**[04:44] Aqua**
Kazuma-san...
**[04:54] Aqua**
Hey! That arrow almost messed
up the best part of my hair—
**[05:00] Kazuma**
Aqua!
**[05:04] Kazuma**
KONOSUBA!
**[05:10] Kazuma**
My skill... My skill...
**[05:12] Sena**
A-Are you people always like this?
**[05:15] Megumin**
W-Wait a moment!
**[05:17] Megumin**
The toads!
**[05:20] Kazuma**
This is bad! Now there's not enough bai—
**[05:22] Kazuma**
I mean, enough decoys to keep them occupied!
**[05:26] Kazuma**
Aqua, you should still be
keeping them occupied!
**[05:28] Aqua**
No way! You be the decoy this time!
**[05:30] Kazuma**
Stupid! You don't have enough
attack power to beat these toads!
**[05:34] Kazuma**
If we can beat even one of them,
that'd leave just two!
**[05:36] Kazuma**
Then you and Sena-san can
keep them busy together!
**[05:39] Sena**
I'm just here to supervise you all,
not to get dragged into—
**[05:47] Aqua**
Kazuma, there's your chance!
**[05:49] Aqua**
Hurry and get the toa—
**[05:51] Aqua**
No!
**[05:54] Kazuma**
You guys!
**[05:56] Megumin**
Excuse me, but I think I'm
slowly being swallowed.
**[05:59] Megumin**
Could you rescue me now, please?
**[06:03] Kazuma**
Aw, damn it!
**[06:04] Kazuma**
If only Darkness were here!
**[06:21] Kazuma**
We're doomed!
**[06:23] Yunyun**
Light of Saber!
**[06:43] Yunyun**
KONOSUBA!
**[06:45] Kazuma**
*I honestly don't want to touch them...*
**[06:50] Kazuma**
You should be able to walk now.
**[06:51] Kazuma**
I don't know who you are, but thanks.
**[06:55] Yunyun**
I-I wasn't trying to save you.
**[06:58] Yunyun**
If my rival had been eaten by
a toad, I'd look ridiculous...
**[07:04] Kazuma**
Rival?
**[07:08] Yunyun**
I-It's been a long time, Megumin!
**[07:10] Yunyun**
Today is the day we finally
settle our long-standing score!
**[07:14] Megumin**
Who might you be, exactly?
**[07:16] Megumin**
I mean, it's strange that
you never gave your name.
**[07:21] Megumin**
This must be one of those "Hey, it's me!"
scams that Kazuma described before.
**[07:25] Yunyun**
F-Fine, then!
**[07:27] Yunyun**
It's embarrassing to do this
in front of strangers, but...
**[07:32] Yunyun**
My name is Yunyun!
**[07:33] Yunyun**
An arch wizard and master
of advanced magic!
**[07:37] Yunyun**
She who will one day lead the Crimson Demons!
**[07:40] Megumin**
Anyway, this is Yunyun.
**[07:42] Megumin**
Daughter of the Crimson Demons' leader,
and my self-proclaimed rival.
**[07:46] Yunyun**
So you *did* remember!
**[07:47] Kazuma**
I see. Well, I'm one of her
adventuring friends, Kazuma.
**[07:51] Kazuma**
Nice to meet you, Yunyun.
**[07:53] Yunyun**
H-Huh?
**[07:54] Yunyun**
You're not laughing at my name?
**[07:58] Kazuma**
Well, y'know, in this world of ours,
**[07:59] Kazuma**
there are some who have weird
names in the first place,
**[08:02] Kazuma**
but still end up with disgraceful
nicknames like "Crazy Exploding Girl."
**[08:06] Megumin**
You mean me? You're talking
about me, aren't you?!
**[08:09] Megumin**
How did that name attach itself to me
and I'm only now hearing about it?!
**[08:13] Yunyun**
I-Impressive, Megumin.
You've found good allies!
**[08:15] Kazuma**
Cut it out! Don't touch me!
**[08:17] Yunyun**
As befits my rival!
**[08:19] Yunyun**
I'll defeat you and become
first among the Crimson Demons!
**[08:23] Yunyun**
Now, Megumin, I challenge you to a duel!
**[08:26] Megumin**
I'd rather not. It's too cold.
**[08:29] Yunyun**
Why?!
**[08:30] Yunyun**
Please, fight me!
**[08:33] Megumin**
No, thank you.
**[08:34] Yunyun**
Please!
**[08:35] Yunyun**
One fight! Just once!
**[08:36] Sena**
You somehow managed today,
**[08:37] Megumin**
No.
**[08:38] Yunyun**
Then when can we have a duel?!
**[08:38] Sena**
but I'm not fully convinced this
wasn't just an act to deceive me.
**[08:41] Megumin**
How should I know?
**[08:41] Yunyun**
But why?! Megumin!
**[08:43] Sena**
Excuse me.
**[08:44] Aqua**
Well, I'll make arrangements for the
guild to haul the toad meat in.
**[08:44] Megumin**
I said no.
**[08:45] Yunyun**
Come on, Megumin! Just one little duel!
**[08:48] Megumin**
Not happening.
**[08:49] Kazuma**
* I don't really appreciate being left*
* on my own with these two...*
**[08:50] Yunyun**
Aw, come on, Megumin!
**[08:55] Megumin**
Very well, then.
**[08:58] Megumin**
I can no longer use my magic today,
**[09:00] Megumin**
so let's make it a contest in the martial arts
that you're supposed to be skilled at.
**[09:04] Yunyun**
Really?
**[09:05] Yunyun**
I mean, you barely attended
martial arts class at the academy...
**[09:10] Kazuma**
*Stare.*
**[09:10] Yunyun**
And every lunch period,
you'd show up like clockwork,
**[09:13] Kazuma**
*Stare...*
**[09:14] Yunyun**
challenge me to a duel,
and then steal my lunch...
**[09:16] Kazuma**
*Stare...*
**[09:19] Kazuma**
Girl...
**[09:20] Megumin**
It was a matter of life and death for me.
**[09:22] Megumin**
Due to personal circumstances, her lunches
were the only thing keeping me alive.
**[09:26] Yunyun**
All right, then that will be how we fight!
**[09:29] Kazuma**
Seriously?
**[09:30] Megumin**
Very well.
**[09:32] Megumin**
Now then, come at me as you will!
**[09:40] Kazuma**
* Judging from their builds, it looks*
* like Yunyun's gonna win this.*
**[09:43] Kazuma**
* I can't even begin to imagine Megumin*
* being any good at unarmed combat.*
**[09:51] Yunyun**
M-Megumin...
**[09:53] Yunyun**
Um, your body's still kind of shiny...
**[09:58] Megumin**
That's right.
**[09:59] Megumin**
What you see clinging to every inch of me
are the fluids from inside a toad's stomach.
**[10:04] Megumin**
Come! The moment you get close to me,
**[10:07] Megumin**
I'll grab you with both arms
**[10:08] Megumin**
and put you in a submission hold!
**[10:11] Yunyun**
N-No way!
**[10:13] Yunyun**
You're trying to make me lose my will
to fight so I'll give up, aren't you?
**[10:17] Yunyun**
Right?
**[10:20] Megumin**
We're friends, aren't we?
**[10:23] Megumin**
And I believe friendship means
sharing in each other's suffering.
**[10:27] Yunyun**
No!
**[10:28] Megumin**
C'mon. C'mon. C'mon.
**[10:31] Megumin**
C'mon! C'mon! C'mon!
**[10:31] Yunyun**
I give up! I'll give up!
**[10:33] Yunyun**
Stay away from me!
**[10:34] Megumin**
C'mon!
**[10:37] Yunyun**
I give up! I already gave up!
**[10:41] Megumin**
I win again!
**[10:45] Darkness**
S-Stop it!
**[10:47] Darkness**
Damn you!
**[10:49] Darkness**
K-Kill—
**[10:51] Kazuma**
She actually ran off crying.
**[10:54] Megumin**
Kazuma.
**[10:55] Megumin**
The spoils of war.
**[10:56] Megumin**
Sell it to start making your payments.
**[10:59] Kazuma**
Are you sure?
**[11:01] Megumin**
It is of no use to a grand sorceress
such as myself, who operates beyond
**[11:04] Megumin**
the bounds of society.
**[11:07] Kazuma**
Do you ever think about learning
skills other than explosion ma—
**[11:09] Megumin**
Never.
**[11:10] Kazuma**
Yeah, I figured.
**[11:14] Megumin**
What is it?
**[11:15] Kazuma**
I was just thinking that you're
prettier than that other girl.
**[11:20] Duck Girl**
Wait!
**[11:22] Megumin**
Well, thank you very much!
**[11:24] Megumin**
As thanks, let me give you a big hug!
**[11:26] Kazuma**
S-Stay away from me!
**[11:28] Megumin**
You should be happier.
**[11:30] Megumin**
Some people would pay money to
have a slimy girl all over them.
**[11:36] Kazuma**
You reek of toads!
**[11:40] Kazuma**
I never thought an embrace
could be so unpleasant...
**[11:44] Megumin**
Chomusuke!
**[11:45] Megumin**
Were you a good—
**[11:50] Kazuma**
Well, I'm off to the bath.
**[11:53] Kazuma**
What is it?
**[11:54] Megumin**
Surely you've heard of "ladies first"?
**[11:57] Kazuma**
I yearn for true gender equality.
**[12:00] Kazuma**
I have no patience for one who talks about
female privilege when it suits them,
**[12:03] Kazuma**
and then complains about someone
"not being a man" when it's convenient!
**[12:13] Kazuma**
Besides, if you want to be treated like
a lady, you should grow into one first!
**[12:18] Megumin**
You're treating me like a
child again, aren't you?!
**[12:20] Megumin**
For the record, I'm only
three years younger than you!
**[12:23] Kazuma**
Yet you seem like just a kid to me,
so you're wasting your time!
**[12:27] Megumin**
This guy's actually taking his clothes off!
**[12:29] Kazuma**
I'm not backing down on this one!
**[12:30] Kazuma**
No matter what! Get it?!
**[12:32] Kazuma**
If you do, then get out of here already!
**[12:35] Megumin**
I see. So you don't really
see me as a woman, then.
**[12:39] Megumin**
In that case, I may as well join you.
**[12:42] Kazuma**
True. Getting in together
will solve both our problems.
**[12:45] Megumin**
Wha?!
**[12:46] Megumin**
E-Excuse me, doesn't this usually
call for a response like,
**[12:48] Megumin**
"D-Dummy! I could never do that!"
**[12:50] Megumin**
And then bashfully allowing
me to use the bath first?
**[12:53] Kazuma**
Just so you know, I'm not
the type to go for clichés.
**[12:57] Kazuma**
Say, for instance, you were in love with me,
**[12:59] Kazuma**
and some other girl was making moves on me.
**[13:02] Kazuma**
If you were to, out of jealousy,
inflict some unjust violence on me,
**[13:05] Kazuma**
I would fight back with no hesitation.
**[13:07] Kazuma**
I'm a guy who does what he has to do!
**[13:09] Kazuma**
You'd do well to remember that!
**[13:13] Megumin**
I get the feeling your application of that
saying leaves something to be desired,
**[13:17] Megumin**
but all right, fine.
**[13:19] Kazuma**
So after provoking me like that,
you're not gonna join me?
**[13:21] Kazuma**
I'm surprised at your lack of resolve.
**[13:23] Megumin**
How dare you?!
**[13:24] Megumin**
You think I lack resolve?!
**[13:26] Megumin**
Yep.
**[13:26] Megumin**
Them's fighting words! Fine, I'll get in!
**[13:28] Megumin**
It's just a bath! I can do that!
**[13:29] Megumin**
Ouch!
**[13:30] Megumin**
Now, stop skulking behind that towel,
and and let's get in the bath!
**[13:31] Megumin**
Whoa, whoa, whoa! What are you doing?!
**[13:33] ---**
Stop, you idiot!
**[13:35] Kazuma**
Don't pull on it, you perv! Show a little shame!
**[13:37] Megumi**
Out with it!
**[13:44] Kazuma**
Hey.
**[13:45] Megumin**
Yes?
**[13:46] Kazuma**
I thought cats didn't like baths.
**[13:49] Megumin**
She likes to stay clean.
**[13:52] Kazuma**
Hey...
**[13:53] Megumin**
Yes?
**[13:54] Kazuma**
Is that other girl gonna be okay?
**[13:56] Megumin**
I'm sure I'll see her again.
**[13:58] Megumin**
She chases after me,
claiming to be my rival, after all.
**[14:02] Kazuma**
She's the same age as you, right?
**[14:04] Megumin**
Why don't you just come out and say what you
were thinking when you looked at me just now?
**[14:09] Kazuma**
I was thinking how everybody
matures at their own pace—
**[14:11] Megumin**
Darkness blacker than black
and darker than dark...
**[14:12] Kazuma**
Hey, cut that out!
**[14:13] Kazuma**
It's bad for my heart!
**[14:15] Megumin**
I'm sure that in another year or two,
**[14:17] Megumin**
I'll have a body that'll have
Yunyun crying for forgiveness...
**[14:22] Megumin**
I would appreciate it if you'd
stop staring so intently!
**[14:27] Kazuma**
Why are we in the bath together?
**[14:30] Megumin**
Why bring that up now?
**[14:31] Megumin**
Why would you suddenly come to your senses?!
**[14:35] Kazuma**
Well, I mean, anyone seeing
this would probably react—
**[14:39] Aqua**
I'm back!
**[14:41] Aqua**
Hey, I got the cash for the toad meat!
**[14:45] Kazuma**
Is it locked?!
**[14:46] Kazuma**
Did you lock the door to the bath?!
**[14:48] Megumin**
I-I didn't!
**[14:49] Megumin**
Wh-Wh-What do we do?!
**[14:51] Aqua**
Kazuma? Megumin? I'm back!
**[14:55] Aqua**
It'd be nice if someone would say something!
**[14:58] Aqua**
Huh? The bath?
**[15:00] Kazuma**
Freeze!
**[15:05] Kazuma**
Either I'm doomed, or my magic holds out!
**[15:06] Aqua**
Hey!
**[15:07] Aqua**
Anyone there?
**[15:09] Kazuma**
Hold out, magic power of mine!
**[15:12] Kazuma**
If Aqua sees us, it'll mean getting
called "Pedo-NEET" and "Lolimaniac"
**[15:15] Kazuma**
and other disgraceful nicknames!
**[15:21] Kazuma**
*I don't even have the strength to stand.*
**[15:25] Aqua**
Megumin, when you get out of
the bath, let's have lunch.
**[15:29] Aqua**
Actually, get out of there already.
**[15:30] Aqua**
I'm all slimy myself, y'know!
**[15:38] Megumin**
That was a close one. If things
had gone on much longer...
**[15:40] Kazuma**
I almost got branded a lolicon.
**[15:44] Kazuma**
Hey, Megumin.
**[15:45] Kazuma**
Sorry to ask, but I can't move,
so could you dry me off?
**[15:49] Megumin**
Hey.
**[15:50] Megumin**
Why don't you explain exactly why getting
into the bath with me makes you a lolicon?
**[15:57] Kazuma**
Hey, wait, stop it!
**[15:58] Kazuma**
What are you trying to do?!
You'll be branded a female pervert!
**[16:00] Kazuma**
Hey, A-Aqua!
**[16:01] Kazuma**
Aqua! The little girl is bullying me!
**[16:09] Aqua**
Pedo-NEET.
***SIGN*** 12 Giant Toads Killed
***SIGN*** Today's Results
**[16:18] Kazuma**
* The day after receiving*
* my disgraceful title,*
**[16:20] Kazuma**
* we dropped by Wiz's shop to figure*
* out what to do about my debt.*
**[16:25] Kazuma**
Hey!
**[16:26] Kazuma**
I'm looking to sell this.
**[16:30] Wiz**
She's here to—
**[16:30] Yunyun**
M-My name is Yunyun!
**[16:33] Yunyun**
What a coincidence!
**[16:35] Yunyun**
What a quirk of fate!
**[16:36] Yunyun**
To think that we would
have an encounter here!
**[16:38] Yunyun**
You truly are my lifelong rival!
**[16:41] Wiz**
She heard that you all
visit my store regularly
**[16:44] Wiz**
and has been waiting all morning.
**[16:45] Yunyun**
Wh-What are you saying, shopkeep?!
**[16:48] Yunyun**
I just came by to buy some magic items...
**[16:50] Yunyun**
U-Um, I'd like this!
**[16:52] Yunyun**
KONOSUBA!
**[16:55] Kazuma**
I see.
**[16:56] Kazuma**
You could've just come by the
mansion instead of doing all this.
**[17:00] Yunyun**
But I can't just visit someone's
home unannounced...
**[17:03] Megumin**
It's always half-measures with you.
**[17:05] Megumin**
That's why you can't make friends.
**[17:06] Aqua**
Is that true?
**[17:08] Megumin**
Yunyun is the rare Crimson Demon
who's embarrassed by her name.
**[17:11] Megumin**
She would usually eat lunch
alone at the academy.
**[17:14] Wiz**
Now, now.
**[17:14] Megumin**
And whenever I would cross her line of sight,
**[17:17] Megumin**
she'd gleefully challenge me over and over.
**[17:20] Yunyun**
I-It wasn't that bad!
**[17:22] Yunyun**
I did have some friends.
**[17:24] Megumin**
I can hardly believe what I'm hearing.
**[17:26] Megumin**
You had friends, Yunyun?
**[17:28] Yunyun**
Of course! Even I had friends!
**[17:31] Yunyun**
There was Funifura-san and Dodonko-san,
**[17:33] Yunyun**
who would always say, "We're friends, right?"
and I would treat them to lunch...
**[17:37] Kazuma**
Hey, stop!
**[17:38] Kazuma**
I don't want to hear any more!
**[17:40] Megumin**
Well, since I can only use explosion magic,
**[17:43] Megumin**
I would rather avoid magic duels.
**[17:46] Yunyun**
Would you learn some other magic already?
**[17:48] Yunyun**
You're bound to have unused
skill points, right?
**[17:51] Megumin**
Yes, I do.
**[17:53] Megumin**
And I intend to put them all into
"Explosion Magic Power Boost"
**[17:56] Megumin**
and "High-Speed Casting."
**[17:58] Yunyun**
Stupid! Why are you so obsessed
with explosion magic?!
**[18:01] Kazuma**
That's right, you tell her!
**[18:03] Yunyun**
You've always been this way, Megumin!
**[18:03] Aqua**
All this talk of duels...
For classmates, you guys sure are vicious.
**[18:06] Megumin**
Your lack of appreciation for explosion
magic makes you the crazy one.
**[18:09] Aqua**
Hey, hey.
**[18:10] Aqua**
Maybe this would be good?
**[18:12] Aqua**
"The friendship crystal."
**[18:14] Wiz**
Oh, only a seasoned magic user
can use that effectively.
**[18:19] Yunyun**
If you can use it well, can you make friends?
**[18:22] Wiz**
Well, yes.
**[18:24] Wiz**
I know! Why not try it?
**[18:26] Megumin**
I hardly see the need to make friends...
**[18:29] Yunyun**
Have you lost your nerve, Megumin?
**[18:32] Yunyun**
In other words,
**[18:33] Yunyun**
being able to use this more effectively
is proof of greater spell casting skill!
**[18:37] Yunyun**
I challenge you, Megumin!
**[18:39] Megumin**
If you insist, then I will demonstrate for you
**[18:42] Megumin**
the power of a true magic user!
**[18:45] Yunyun**
Today is the day we settle this score!
**[18:52] Wiz**
Just what I'd expect from Crimson Demons.
**[18:54] Yunyun**
Now, crystal, demonstrate your power!
**[18:57] Wiz**
The crystal's power is activating!
**[19:07] Wiz**
It's never projected this much before!
**[19:10] Wiz**
They both have incredible magic!
**[19:12] Kazuma**
What... is this?!
**[19:22] Kazuma**
Is she gathering bread crusts?
**[19:25] Aqua**
Wait a minute...
**[19:31] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Happy birthday!
**[19:34] Aqua**
Is she... by herself?
**[19:36] (Flashback) Farmer**
Dang it!
**[19:39] (Flashback) Komekko**
Onee-chan, you're amazing!
**[19:47] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Not bad! But how about this?!
**[19:52] (Flashback) Komekko**
You're so great!
**[20:04] (Flashback) Komekko**
Onee-chan, this is great!
**[20:07] (Flashback) Yunyun**
I wouldn't even mind a devil
for a friend at this point...
**[20:10] Kazuma**
She's working odd jobs to take
her "friends" out to eat?!
**[20:14] Aqua**
Wait, why is she...
**[20:16] Aqua**
eating a bug?
**[20:19] Megumin**
What is this?!
**[20:21] Yunyun**
Shopkeep, you said this crystal
would create friendship, right?!
**[20:23] Wiz**
This is a valued item that deepens
feelings of friendship and love
**[20:30] Wiz**
by exposing past embarrassment... actually...
**[20:34] Yunyun**
Megumin! Hey, Megumin!
**[20:36] Yunyun**
Is this going to make us friends?!
**[20:45] Yunyun**
KONOSUBA!
**[20:47] Wiz**
I'll just put that on your tab, Kazuma-san.
**[20:50] Kazuma**
Hang on. Megumin was the one who broke it.
**[20:52] Megumin**
Yunyun was the one who wanted to use it.
**[20:55] Megumin**
She'll pay.
**[20:56] Yunyun**
My duel... I finally got her to duel, and...
**[20:59] Megumin**
How long are you going to mope?
**[21:01] Yunyun**
But how do we know who won?
**[21:03] Yunyun**
Can we call it a draw?
**[21:06] Megumin**
I don't mind.
**[21:08] Megumin**
I'm not childish enough to be
competitive over games anymore.
**[21:12] Yunyun**
Come to think of it, didn't we used to
compete to see who would grow faster?
**[21:16] Yunyun**
If you think you're not childish anymore,
do you want to do that again?
**[21:20] Megumin**
That's not what I mean when
I talk about being childish.
**[21:25] Megumin**
After all, I'm...
**[21:30] Megumin**
in the kind of relationship with Kazuma
here where we bathe together.
**[21:34] Kazuma**
Hey!
**[21:35] Wiz**
Oh, my!
**[21:39] Kazuma**
Don't joke about that!
**[21:41] Kazuma**
Is this the mouth?!
**[21:41] Kazuma**
Is this the mouth trying to make
my reputation even worse?!
**[21:44] Yunyun**
I-I'll...
**[21:46] Yunyun**
I'll admit that I lost today!
**[21:51] Wiz**
Come again!
**[21:53] Aqua**
She's a lively girl.
**[21:54] Kazuma**
You are, too.
**[21:58] Megumin**
I win again!
***SIGN*** Episode 3
***SIGN*** Peace for the Master of This Labyrinth!
***SIGN*** Here is the progress report I said I would send. Mr. Kazuma seemed like a problem at first, but he's become a seasoned and formidable adventurer. Absolutely not the kind of person to sexually harass anyone or get into debt. My assessment of his character proves to be on point. Yes, I am a really capable goddess. I've even gained the respect of the construction bosses, so my daily wages have gone up. I think I can keep working it and my side jobs with the fake flowers and the milk cartons, at this rate. ...No, I don't just work part-time jobs!
**[23:31] Aqua**
Here is the progress report I said I would send.
**[23:33] Aqua**
Mr. Kazuma seemed like a problem at first,
**[23:35] Aqua**
but he's become a seasoned
and formidable adventurer.
**[23:39] Aqua**
Absolutely not the kind—
# E4 - A Betrothed for This Noble Daughter!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G675Q70KR/a-betrothed-for-this-noble-daughter)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] A**
Achoo!
**[00:02] K**
My, oh my, are you catching
a cold? Take care, now.
**[00:06] A**
You're sounding pretty nasal
yourself, Kazuma-san.
**[00:08] A**
I'll hurry and fix this tracksuit for you.
**[00:11] K**
You're the one who threw it
in the fireplace, though.
**[00:17] K**
My, oh my, feeling hungry?
**[00:20] A**
Actually, I guess I haven't
eaten breakfast yet.
**[00:23] K**
You're the one who got carried away and
spent all our money on booze, though.
**[00:31] A**
But... everyone was having
so much fun partying!
**[00:36] A**
That looks like the fancy bubbly
I had hidden under my bed...
**[00:41] K**
I wonder if the pawn shop's open...
**[00:43] M**
Come here, Chomusuke.
**[00:45] A**
Give it back! That's my last bottle!
**[00:48] A**
It's my last hope!
**[00:50] K**
I'm gonna go trade it for cash right now!
**[00:52] K**
And if I can't, I'll just
drink it all right here!
**[00:54] K**
Maybe that would warm me up a little!
**[00:56] A**
Don't! I can't fall asleep if
I'm not holding that bottle!
**[01:00] K**
You're making demands like that
after burning my tracksuit?!
**[01:03] K**
You ought to go sell that raiment, too!
**[01:06] A**
What are you saying?!
**[01:07] A**
This raiment is part of my
identity as a goddess!
**[01:10] A**
There's no way I can sell it!
**[01:12] A**
Are you stupid? Why are you being so stupid?!
**[01:15] K**
Steal!
**[01:19] A**
Kazuma-sama!
**[01:21] A**
I'm sorry for getting carried
away, so please stop!
**[01:23] K**
Shut up!
**[01:25] K**
We haven't repaid any of our debt
and Darkness still isn't back!
**[01:28] K**
You should be more concerned about that!
**[01:30] D**
Trouble, Kazuma! Major trouble!
**[01:37] Everyone**
Who are you?
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! 2
***SIGN*** Episode 4 A Betrothed for This Noble Daughter!
**[03:13] K**
Who are you?
**[03:15] K**
Huh? She's... glad?
**[03:17] D**
Kazuma! Can't you save this
kind of play for later?!
**[03:17] (K**
Yes?
**[03:20] (K**
Wait... Is that you, Darkness?
**[03:22] (K**
We were so worried!
**[03:24] A**
Darkness!
**[03:26] A**
Kazuma... Kazuma, he...
**[03:28] A**
He stripped me against my will
**[03:29] A**
and wants to sell my most intimate possession!
**[03:32] D**
Wha?!
**[03:33] K**
Hey! Word choice!
**[03:34] M**
Welcome back, Darkness.
**[03:36] D**
Oh, Megumin. It's good to be back.
**[03:39] D**
That cat...
**[03:40] M**
I won't ask what happened.
**[03:42] M**
First, take a nice, long bath...
**[03:45] M**
and let your body and soul recover...
**[03:48] D**
Uh, what are you talking about?
**[03:50] D**
I'm more curious about
what Aqua was describing...
**[03:56] A**
No doubt about it.
This is an expensive dress.
**[04:00] K**
You must've been through so much...
**[04:02] D**
Where are you getting your weird ideas?!
**[04:04] D**
Do you think the lord had his
way with me or something?
**[04:07] K**
We're just glad you're back.
**[04:09] K**
Go on, take that warm bath
and cry your heart out.
**[04:13] D**
You're wrong! He didn't have the
guts to demand that much from me!
**[04:18] D**
Look at this! This is the problem!
**[04:19] K**
What is it?
**[04:21] K**
Wow, what a handsome guy!
**[04:23] K**
Pisses me off.
**[04:24] D**
What are you doing?!
**[04:26] K**
My hands moved on their own...
**[04:31] K**
So the hot guy is the lord's son, huh?
**[04:34] D**
In exchange for the lenience
you received, he demanded
**[04:37] D**
an arranged marriage meeting with his son.
**[04:39] D**
The reason I was away for so long
**[04:41] D**
is because I was trying to
figure out a way to prevent it.
**[04:45] D**
My father doesn't hold Aldarp in high regard,
**[04:48] D**
but he thinks highly of his son.
**[04:51] D**
He's the one most excited about the idea.
**[04:54] D**
Please! Come with me,
**[04:56] D**
and help me convince my father!
**[04:59] A**
Here you go.
**[05:01] A**
How about it? Good as new, right?
**[05:02] K**
How is it that you're so versatile
when it comes to stuff like this?
**[05:07] K**
*It's true...*
**[05:08] K**
* If we don't do something, our valuable*
* crusader is going to be married off.*
**[05:12] K**
*Our valued...*
**[05:14] D**
Thank you, Aqua.
**[05:16] K**
*She'll be... married?*
**[05:16] (D**
It's getting to the point where
I'm having trouble refusing.
**[05:18] K**
* Which means our crusader who can't*
* land any hits will be leaving our party?*
**[05:19] (A**
Oh, it's fine! Something like this
is a piece of cake for a goddess!
**[05:24] (A**
No one would be able to
tell it's not the original!
**[05:24] K**
* It's not that I'm trying to subtly*
* kick her out of the party...*
**[05:27] A**
Literally godly skills!
You can praise me some more—
**[05:29] M**
Kazuma?
**[05:33] K**
That's it!
**[05:38] K**
I'm Kazuma.
**[05:41] D**
What do you mean, I should
accept the arranged marriage?!
**[05:43] M**
Don't you care if Darkness can't
adventure with us anymore?!
**[05:47] K**
Look, refusing the arrangement
**[05:49] K**
is just going to make that
lord guy even less reasonable!
**[05:53] M**
That's true...
**[05:54] K**
In that case, you have to accept
the arrangement, but then ruin it!
**[05:56] D**
Ru—
**[05:57] K**
And do it without hurting your family's name.
**[06:00] D**
That's it! Let's do that!
**[06:02] D**
If it works, I won't have to slap my father silly
**[06:04] D**
every time he brings up
the subject of marriage!
**[06:08] K**
*I feel bad for your old man...*
**[06:10] Sena**
Satou Kazuma!
**[06:12] Sena**
Is Satou Kazuma here?!
**[06:16] K**
Wh-What is it this time?!
**[06:18] Sena**
There are strange monsters
surrounding the town.
**[06:21] Sena**
Do you know anything about that?
**[06:22] ---**
Huh?
**[06:23] Sena**
You will accompany us at once.
**[06:26] M**
We have to refuse.
**[06:27] M**
One of our most precious comrades
is facing a grave crisis!
**[06:31] M**
We cannot afford to ignore it!
**[06:35] D**
Megumin...
**[06:36] K**
Hey, calm down!
**[06:38] K**
*Hang on...*
**[06:40] K**
*Aqua I can manage,*
**[06:41] K**
* but Megumin is weirdly smart*
* about certain things.*
**[06:44] K**
*Better to get her out of the way.*
**[06:47] K**
Megumin...
**[06:49] K**
Please, go.
**[06:51] K**
If there's a large number of monsters,
**[06:53] K**
that's a job for your explosion magic.
**[06:55] K**
It's okay. You can leave
Darkness to Aqua and me.
**[06:59] M**
But...
**[07:02] K**
You're the only one who can do this.
**[07:06] M**
I'm the only one?!
**[07:08] K**
We're counting on you,
ultimate arch wizard!
**[07:11] M**
I will demonstrate my power!
**[07:17] M**
KONOSUBA!
**[07:21] Dad**
Y-You're certain, then, Lalatina?
**[07:24] D**
I am, Father.
**[07:26] D**
I, Lalatina, have decided to attend the
meeting for this arranged marriage.
**[07:31] Dad**
And these two are...?
**[07:32] D**
My adventuring friends.
**[07:35] D**
They will accompany me at the meeting
as a temporary butler and maid.
**[07:43] Maids**
How does it fit?
**[07:45] K**
I think it's okay.
**[07:53] K**
Hey, that looks good on you.
**[07:55] K**
You look like a proper servant!
**[07:57] A**
I think the "wannabe-butler who's trying
too hard" look suits you too, Kazuma.
**[08:01] K**
Oh, that was *so* funny.
**[08:04] K**
If we weren't in a noble's mansion,
**[08:06] K**
I would've had to let you have it.
**[08:09] K**
Right, Miss Lalatina?
**[08:10] D**
D-Don't call me "Miss Lalatina"!
**[08:14] K**
*Her father ended up asking me for help.*
**[08:17] K**
* He requested I ensure his daughter*
* wouldn't cause an incident.*
**[08:23] K**
* And if the meeting goes*
* well, he'll reward me!*
**[08:28] K**
*I can't help but feel motivated.*
**[08:31] D**
You know what to do, right?
I'm counting on you.
**[08:38] Dad**
I'm glad you decided to attend the meeting.
**[08:42] Dad**
I want you to find happiness, Lalatina.
**[08:45] D**
Please, Father.
**[08:47] D**
I simply said that I'd consider
the arranged marriage.
**[08:51] Dad**
What?
**[08:53] D**
And after considering it,
**[08:55] D**
I've decided that it's still too
soon for me to get married.
**[08:58] D**
It's too late now!
**[09:00] D**
I agreed to meet with him,
but I never said I would marry him!
**[09:04] D**
I'll destroy it...
**[09:05] D**
I'll destroy this stupid meeting!
**[09:09] Dad**
L-Lalatina!
**[09:11] K**
Please refrain from using such vulgar language.
**[09:15] K**
You'll give your partner a bad impression.
**[09:17] D**
You rat! Are you betraying me?!
**[09:18] D**
I am currently serving as a temporary
butler for the Dustiness family.
**[09:22] D**
My wish is for your happiness, milady.
**[09:25] Dad**
K-Kazuma-kun!
**[09:27] D**
Damn you, Kazuma!
**[09:37] Dad**
Sir Walther!
**[09:39] D**
So you've come...
**[09:40] D**
You're the one they intend for me to marry?
**[09:43] D**
I am Dustiness Ford Lalatina!
**[09:45] D**
You can call me Mistress Dus—
**[09:47] K**
Milady! Please watch your step!
**[09:50] D**
I thought you were going to help me!
**[09:52] K**
Did you forget the part about not
besmirching your family's name?
**[09:56] D**
If I have a bad reputation,
fewer people will consider marrying me,
**[09:59] D**
and I can continue to focus on adventuring!
**[10:02] D**
I'm even prepared to be disinherited!
**[10:04] D**
Even then, I will survive as best I can
**[10:05] D**
and continue accepting
quests I'm unqualified for,
**[10:08] D**
until I am overwhelmed and captured
by the Devil King's army,
**[10:11] D**
held down by them...
**[10:12] (K**
That doesn't sound like the
Devil King. Sounds like a perv.
**[10:13] D**
That's the kind of life I want!
**[10:15] K**
You finally came out and admitted it...
**[10:18] D**
Besides, he's far from my type of man.
**[10:22] D**
First, he seems to be of
absolutely decent character.
**[10:24] D**
He never angers toward anyone.
**[10:26] D**
He works hard
**[10:27] D**
and was strong enough to achieve
knighthood at the earliest age on record.
**[10:30] A**
That sounds pretty good to me.
**[10:32] D**
How?!
**[10:33] D**
If you're a noble, you should act like one,
**[10:35] D**
with a vulgar grin on your face at all times!
**[10:38] D**
What exactly is that pure,
focused gaze of his?!
**[10:41] D**
I want something more...
**[10:42] D**
Like what Kazuma always does,
**[10:44] D**
when he looks at me as if he's
licking me all over with his gaze!
**[10:47] K**
I-I-I do not look at you that way!
**[10:49] D**
He never angers?!
**[10:51] D**
What a moron!
**[10:52] D**
Using a maid's mistakes to subject
her to all kinds of punishment
**[10:55] D**
is what nobles are supposed to do!
**[10:57] D**
Besides, the type I like is
**[10:59] D**
the polar opposite of such a competent man!
**[11:02] D**
He's not particularly attractive and
can be either scrawny or fat.
**[11:06] D**
He needs to be weak-willed enough
that, despite my love for him,
**[11:09] D**
he's easily strung along by
another woman's affection.
**[11:11] D**
Someone who's in rut all year round—
the more perverse, the better!
**[11:15] D**
A failure at life, who tries to
take the easiest route possible!
**[11:19] D**
And if he's in debt, that'd be even better!
**[11:21] D**
Then he could drink all day and never work,
**[11:23] D**
and complain that it's
society's fault he's a loser!
**[11:26] D**
He'd throw an empty bottle
at me while saying...
**[11:29] D**
"Hey, Darkness.
**[11:30] D**
Why don't you use that nasty body
of yours to earn us some cash?"
**[11:37] K**
*Damn it all! This girl is completely hopeless!*
**[11:42] B**
Well, let me introduce myself.
**[11:44] B**
I am Alexei Barnes Walther.
**[11:47] D**
I am Dustiness Ford Lalatina.
**[11:51] D**
I'll spare you the specific
details of my family.
**[11:53] D**
Telling them to an upstart noble's son
**[11:55] D**
wouldn't do any—
**[11:57] B**
Is something wrong?
**[11:59] D**
N-Nothing. It's just, seeing
your face made me feel si—
**[12:03] D**
Eee!
**[12:06] K**
It seems meeting you has made milady
a bit over-excited, Walther-sama.
**[12:12] B**
Actually, she does seem quite flushed...
**[12:14] B**
I must say, I'm embarrassed.
**[12:17] K**
Hey, milady.
**[12:18] K**
Mouth off any more and you're
gonna get it even colder, got it?
**[12:22] D**
I-I consider it a reward.
**[12:24] K**
* The daughter of this household*
* never breaks character.*
**[12:29] Dad**
I suppose I might be in the way here.
**[12:31] Dad**
Why don't you two go for a walk in the garden?
**[12:45] K**
* What was that?! Awesome!*
* I should have her teach me later!*
**[12:48] B**
Do you have any hobbies?
**[12:49] D**
I enjoy a bit of goblin hunting—
**[12:53] B**
You certainly seem to get along well.
**[12:56] K**
*Did I overdo it?*
**[12:58] ---**
Hee-hee.
**[12:58] K**
*Hee-hee?*
**[12:59] D**
Yes, this butler accompanies me at all times.
**[13:03] D**
We take our meals and baths together...
**[13:05] D**
A-And of course, in bed at night...
**[13:10] K**
* Where exactly is this*
* pervert's shame threshold?*
**[13:14] D**
Enough! I can't put up
with this any longer!
**[13:20] D**
Now, Walther, was it?
**[13:23] D**
You'll accompany me to
the training hall, now!
**[13:25] D**
I'll test your mettle there!
**[13:28] K**
Hey! Darkness...
**[13:31] D**
See?!
**[13:32] D**
If you're a noble,
**[13:33] D**
you should learn to maintain a
lascivious gaze, like Kazuma here!
**[13:37] B**
Miss Lalatina, I am a knight.
**[13:40] B**
I could never raise my sword to a woman.
**[13:42] D**
You spineless wretch...
**[13:44] D**
Well, Kazuma over here claims to
be an advocate of gender equality,
**[13:48] D**
and then boasts about his
willingness to dropkick women!
**[13:54] B**
To be honest, I came here to
turn down the arranged marriage.
**[13:59] B**
But after seeing you,
I've changed my mind.
**[14:02] B**
You speak frankly, but you
still have a charming side.
**[14:06] B**
It's refreshing how you don't mince words,
**[14:08] B**
and the way you treat your
servant as an equal...
**[14:13] B**
I've taken an interest in you.
**[14:15] B**
Isn't this enough?! Why won't you give up?!
**[14:22] D**
What's wrong?!
**[14:25] D**
Don't hold back! Keep it coming!
**[14:28] D**
Show me the strength of your resolve!
**[14:31] K**
* This entire time, Darkness's*
* sword hasn't hit anything,*
**[14:34] K**
* with Walther having the clear*
* advantage... and yet...*
**[14:40] B**
I concede.
**[14:42] B**
I may have greater skill, but your
strength of will was greater.
**[14:46] B**
I cannot strike you any more.
**[14:50] B**
You are a truly strong person.
**[14:53] K**
*It feels like he's given in*
**[14:54] K**
* after Darkness demonstrated*
* how firm her resolve is...*
**[14:57] K**
* But knowing how her head works,*
* I just can't be impressed.*
**[15:01] D**
You spineless fool!
**[15:02] D**
Fine, come on, Kazuma!
**[15:03] D**
Demonstrate your ruthlessness
and depth of depravity to Walther!
**[15:07] K**
*What the heck is she saying?*
**[15:10] B**
I'd actually like to see
**[15:11] B**
the kind of fighting a man who's earned
Miss Lalatina's trust would display.
**[15:16] K**
*And here's Walther, making things worse.*
**[15:19] K**
Well, the arranged marriage is off anyway...
**[15:21] K**
Besides, I doubt you'd spread any
bad rumors about milady here.
**[15:26] D**
Yes! That's it, Kazuma!
**[15:27] D**
I've actually been waiting
to face off against you!
**[15:30] D**
Now, give me everything you have—
**[15:31] K**
Create Water!
**[15:37] K**
Is something wrong?
**[15:38] B**
I didn't expect you to use
magic in a duel of swords...
**[15:41] K**
Is that how it works?
**[15:46] A**
What a creep.
**[15:47] A**
It's clear Kazuma-san is unrivaled
at the art of sexual harassment.
**[15:51] A**
Such a creep.
**[15:52] K**
I wasn't trying to—
**[15:53] D**
See, Walther?!
**[15:54] D**
You need to pay close attention
to how he does this sort of thing!
**[15:57] K**
Oh, damn it!
**[15:59] K**
You want everything I have?!
Then here it comes!
**[16:02] K**
Freeze!
**[16:05] B**
H-He's a demon!
**[16:06] B**
Not only does he douse her
with water in winter,
**[16:08] B**
but then he uses ice magic?!
**[16:10] A**
Well, he earned names like "Crapuma"
and "Kazutrash" for a reason.
**[16:17] D**
This total lack of mercy!
**[16:19] D**
Th-This... is so good!
**[16:24] K**
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
**[16:26] A**
That's it, Darkness!
**[16:28] A**
Puny Kazuma has no chance
against you in a grappling match!
**[16:31] K**
* I am so gonna sell off*
* that raiment of hers later!*
**[16:35] D**
You think you can overpower
me?! How insulting!
**[16:38] D**
The difference in strength between a crusader
like me and an adventurer like you is—
**[16:44] K**
You should know I wouldn't fight fair!
**[16:47] K**
We've known each other long
enough! Figure it out!
**[16:49] K**
Ow!
**[16:54] D**
D-Drain Touch, eh?
**[16:56] D**
But before you can drain my stamina,
**[16:59] D**
I'll break your arms!
**[17:02] K**
G-Go ahead and try— Ow, ow, ow, ow!
**[17:06] K**
* This is bad... I keep draining, but*
* this workhorse isn't slowing down!*
**[17:10] K**
H-Hey... How about a little wager?
**[17:13] K**
The loser has to do any
one thing the winner says.
**[17:18] D**
Very well! When I win,
I'll have you kneel before me!
**[17:22] K**
*Here's my chance!*
**[17:23] K**
All right, then, it's a promise.
**[17:25] K**
And when I win, you can cry and
beg, but I'm not gonna stop!
**[17:28] D**
Wh-What are you going to do?
**[17:30] K**
Something that'll have you crying
and begging for forgiveness!
**[17:34] K**
I can already picture you desperately
begging me for mercy...
**[17:38] K**
I'll make you say, "Please stop!
Please forgive me!"
**[17:41] K**
Oh, don't get ahead of me, you greedy girl!
**[17:44] K**
Because what I have in mind is way
crazier than whatever you're thinking!
**[17:48] D**
Wha— S-Stop it!
**[17:52] D**
I-I want to resist, but the Drain
Touch is sapping my strength...
**[17:55] K**
*I'm pretty sure she's
just loosening her grip.*
**[18:02] D**
At this rate, I will lose...
**[18:02] B**
Amazing...
**[18:04] K**
I'm gonna drain your stamina
until you pass out!
**[18:08] K**
I've got something crazy
for you when you wake up!
**[18:11] K**
Look forward to it!
**[18:14] D**
No matter how you humiliate
me, my heart will nev—
**[18:19] D**
Crazy?
**[18:21] D**
Something crazy...
**[18:23] D**
S-Something... crazy...
**[18:26] D**
Something crazy?!
**[18:28] (Flashback) D**
Go on, take that warm bath
and cry your heart out.
**[18:35] D**
K-K-K-Kazuma!
**[18:36] D**
Wh-What were you planning to do
with my leftover bathwater?!
**[18:41] D**
Sh... Sho...
**[18:43] D**
Shomefing cwazy!
**[18:50] K**
I-I win!
**[18:53] B**
I see why they call you "Kazutrash"!
**[18:55] K**
How rude!
**[18:56] Dad**
I just came by with something to... drink...
**[19:14] A**
They did it.
**[19:16] Dad**
Okay, execute them.
**[19:17] Guys**
No! You've got it all wrong!
**[19:19] Guys**
KONOSUBA.
**[19:21] Dad**
My daughter has always been a
bit awkward around people...
**[19:25] Dad**
Even after becoming a crusader,
she was still alone.
**[19:28] Dad**
Every day, she'd drop by Eris-sama's church,
**[19:30] Dad**
praying for friends to adventure with...
**[19:34] Dad**
And then, one day, she finally had one.
**[19:36] Dad**
She was so happy when she returned and
told me about the thief girl she had met.
**[19:40] Dad**
Her mother died when she was young,
so I may have spoiled her a bit...
**[19:44] Dad**
But I also tried to let her have her freedom.
**[19:47] Dad**
Maybe that wasn't for the best...
**[19:50] K**
*Nah, I think that's her, not you.*
**[19:53] B**
Miss Lalatina is a wonderful woman.
**[19:56] B**
If it weren't for Kazuma-kun,
I'd sincerely want to marry her myself.
**[20:00] K**
Sorry, but I'm not sure
what you're trying to say.
**[20:03] B**
I think you can make Miss Lalatina
happier than I could.
**[20:07] K**
Hey, you wanna step outside?
**[20:08] K**
I don't care if you're a lord's son!
**[20:10] A**
Kazuma-san, cut it out!
You're gonna get me executed, too!
**[20:17] Dad**
Kazuma-kun, please continue
to look after my daughter.
**[20:22] Dad**
Make sure she doesn't
do anything too foolish.
**[20:27] Dad**
Please.
**[20:28] K**
Uh... Well... Sure.
**[20:35] Dad**
Oh, you're awake.
**[20:40] D**
These clothes... Is it already over?
**[20:43] D**
Did you do something foul to me
while I was unconscious?!
**[20:45] K**
I did not! I haven't done anything yet!
**[20:48] K**
While you were asleep,
things got kinda serious!
**[20:54] ---**
Hee-hee.
**[20:55] K**
Hee-hee?
**[20:57] D**
Father, Walther-sama...
**[21:00] D**
Please, forget about this
arranged marriage meeting.
**[21:03] D**
I've been keeping it a secret, but...
**[21:05] D**
Kazuma's child is growing inside me...
**[21:08] K**
Hey! How the hell can you say
that about a virgin like me?!
**[21:13] B**
I see. You're having
Kazuma-kun's child, then?
**[21:17] B**
I'll tell my father that I decided
to refuse the arrangement.
**[21:19] B**
That'll probably be more convenient.
**[21:21] K**
Uh... Yeah...
**[21:27] K**
*He's a really nice guy...*
**[21:29] K**
*C'mon, man, take Darkness off my hands!*
**[21:32] ---**
Hee-hee.
**[21:34] Dad**
A grandchild... My first grandchild...
**[21:37] Dad**
F-F-F-Finally, I'll have a
darling grandchild...
**[21:43] A**
I didn't realize the two
of you were like that...
**[21:47] A**
G-Gotta tell someone...
Gotta tell the guys in town!
**[21:50] A**
That Kazutrash and Darkness are—
**[21:51] K**
Why did you believe her, too?!
**[21:56] S**
Satou Kazuma! Is Satou Kazuma here?!
***SIGN*** Episode 5
***SIGN*** Servitude for This Masked Knight!
***SIGN*** Beloved Father. I no longer wish to strike a member of my family whom I care for. Are you aware that "tough love" is often harder on the one giving it than on the recipient? Especially on their hearts. So for now, please, allow me to live life as a knight for the time being. From your disobedient daughter, Lalatina.
**[23:32] D**
Beloved Father.
**[23:34] D**
I no longer wish to strike a member
of my family whom I care for.
**[23:37] D**
Are you aware that "tough love"
is often harder on the one giving—
# E5 - Servitude for This Masked Knight!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR75Q22ZY/servitude-for-this-masked-knight)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] Sena**
Satou Kazuma!
**[00:02] Sena**
When we looked into the source of
the monsters all around the town,
**[00:06] Sena**
we found them to be coming from
**[00:07] Sena**
the Keele Dungeon that
you entered the other day!
**[00:10] Kazuma**
You can't just blame everything on us.
**[00:13] Kazuma**
I'll ask, just in case. You guys don't
know anything about this, right?
**[00:16] Megumin**
It means nothing to me, unless it has
something to do with explosion magic.
**[00:20] Darkness**
Same goes for me.
**[00:22] Darkness**
I haven't done anything
likely to cause a problem.
**[00:25] Kazuma**
And you?
**[00:26] Aqua**
Of course not!
**[00:27] Aqua**
You're doubting me way too much!
**[00:30] Aqua**
If anything, there should be fewer
monsters in that dungeon because of me!
**[00:35] Kazuma**
*"Because of me"?*
**[00:38] Kazuma**
Get over here.
**[00:39] Kazuma**
Keep talking.
**[00:41] Aqua**
Well, y'see...
**[00:42] (Kazuma**
Uh-huh.
**[00:42] (Kazuma**
The magic circle I drew in that lich's
room was a super serious effort!
**[00:45] (Kazuma**
Yeah?
**[00:46] (Kazuma**
It should still be intact, with any evil
entities being unable to approach it.
**[00:51] Kazuma**
What did you just say?
**[00:52] Aqua**
Wh-What's the big deal? It's like I just said.
**[00:55] Aqua**
The magic circle I put my best effort into
should be keeping monsters away from—
**[00:59] Kazuma**
You idiot!
***SIGN*** Episode 5 Servitude for This Masked Knight!
**[01:06] Aqua**
It shouldn't be my fault...
**[01:09] Kazuma**
It's like this every time.
**[01:11] Kazuma**
Do you have some disease
where you'll freak out if
**[01:13] Kazuma**
you don't negate every
contribution you make?
**[01:15] (Flashback) Kazuma**
The monsters aside,
**[01:16] (Flashback) Kazuma**
we can't just stand by if the
townsfolk are in trouble.
**[01:19] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Please let us help.
**[01:20] Kazuma**
I managed to get her off our case,
**[01:21] ---**
It can't be my fault...
**[01:22] Kazuma**
but if we don't erase that magic circle...
**[01:32] Kazuma**
I see.
**[01:34] Kazuma**
Yeah, those are some strange monsters.
**[01:36] Sena**
Satou-san.
**[01:37] Kazuma**
Satou here.
**[01:38] Sena**
I appreciate your cooperation.
**[01:40] Sena**
It seems like someone must be
summoning these monsters...
**[01:44] Sena**
So please defeat the spell caster,
and place this on the summoning circle.
**[01:49] Sena**
It's a powerful sealing talisman.
**[01:50] Aqua**
Something about the mask on those dolls
disgusts me on an instinctive level.
**[01:55] Aqua**
I wonder what it is...
It's seriously ticking me off.
**[01:59] Aqua**
Huh? Wha...
**[02:00] Aqua**
Wh-What?
**[02:02] Aqua**
Wait... Huh?
**[02:04] Aqua**
What is this? Does it want attention?
**[02:07] Aqua**
Looking at the mask still ticks me off,
**[02:09] Aqua**
but somehow, it's starting to look kinda cute—
**[02:15] Sena**
As you can see,
**[02:16] Sena**
these monsters have a tendency to
grab someone and then explode.
**[02:20] Kazuma**
I see.
**[02:21] Aqua**
Why are you so calm about this?!
**[02:31] Darkness**
Right.
**[02:32] Darkness**
I'll take the lead to clear the way.
**[02:35] Darkness**
Kazuma, stay behind me.
**[02:37] Kazuma**
R-Right.
**[02:38] Megumin**
Kazuma, Kazuma.
**[02:40] Megumin**
I'll just get in the way,
so I'll wait out here...
**[02:43] Aqua**
Then I'll join you.
**[02:44] Kazuma**
Hey, you're coming with us!
**[02:47] Aqua**
No!
**[02:48] Aqua**
I've had enough of dungeons!
**[02:51] Aqua**
If I go in, I'll be left behind again!
**[02:55] Aqua**
No dungeons... No...
**[02:58] Kazuma**
I guess it's just me and Darkness, then.
**[03:00] Darkness**
Just Kazuma and me?!
**[03:02] Darkness**
You seem like a greater
danger than the monsters...
**[03:06] Kazuma**
I could just leave you in the dungeon
**[03:08] Kazuma**
so you can experience
the same trauma as Aqua.
***SIGN*** Exploration Quest
***SIGN*** Investigate the Strange Activity
in Keele's Dungeon
**[03:15] Kazuma**
* Unlike the last time I was down here,*
* the place was lit up like it was inhabited.*
**[03:20] Kazuma**
* Could this be because of*
* these strange monsters?*
**[03:25] Darkness**
I can hit them!
**[03:26] Darkness**
I can actually hit them!
**[03:28] Darkness**
Look, Kazuma!
**[03:29] Darkness**
I can actually hit them with my sword!
**[03:31] Kazuma**
You sure do look happy.
**[03:34] Kazuma**
*But with these other guys around,*
**[03:36] Kazuma**
* I can't erase Aqua's magic circle*
* without anyone noticing...*
**[03:38] Guy**
Hey, wait up! Can we slow down a—
**[03:41] Guy**
It got me! Somebody get this thing off me!
**[03:44] Guy**
No! Stay back!
**[03:47] Kazuma**
Now, Darkness! Let's get moving!
**[03:49] Darkness**
Leave it to me!
**[03:51] Darkness**
What is this sense of fulfillment?!
**[03:54] Darkness**
It feels like I'm doing my duty as a
crusader correctly for the first time!
**[03:58] Darkness**
KONOSUBA!
**[04:02] Kazuma**
What's his deal?
**[04:06] Kazuma**
It seems pretty clear that he's
the master of those dolls.
**[04:10] Kazuma**
Wha— Hey!
**[04:12] Darkness**
You're the one behind this?
**[04:17] Vanir**
I didn't expect you to make it this far.
**[04:21] Vanir**
Welcome to my dungeon, adventurers!
**[04:24] Vanir**
I am the root of this evil,
the source of your problems!
**[04:28] Vanir**
A commander in the Devil King's army,
**[04:29] Vanir**
and a duke of hell who
leads an army of demons...
**[04:32] Vanir**
The archdemon whose sight
pierces all in this world...
**[04:37] Vanir**
I am Vanir.
***SIGN*** Emergency Quest
***SIGN*** Defeat the Devil King Army Commander
Archdemon Vanir
**[04:42] Kazuma**
*One of the Devil King's commanders?!*
**[04:44] Kazuma**
Hey, we need to run!
**[04:46] Darkness**
A servant of the goddess Eris
cannot flee in the face of a demon!
**[04:51] Vanir**
You'd challenge me, Vanir-san,
**[04:53] Vanir**
who is rumored to be even more
powerful than the Devil King?
**[04:57] Vanir**
Well, just calm yourselves.
**[04:59] Vanir**
I may be one of the Devil King's commanders,
**[05:01] Vanir**
but all I do is maintain the
barrier around his castle.
**[05:03] Vanir**
A commander in name only, if you will.
**[05:05] Vanir**
I was asked by the Devil King to
look into what became of Verdia.
**[05:11] Vanir**
While I was in Axel, I decided to
drop in on the knucklehead shopkeeper
**[05:16] Vanir**
who seems to have a strange talent for
losing more money the harder she works.
**[05:21] Vanir**
I am what is commonly known as demonkin...
**[05:26] Vanir**
And the greatest sustenance for demons
**[05:28] Vanir**
is the dark emotions you
humans are so ashamed of!
**[05:32] Vanir**
With the birth of every new human,
**[05:34] Vanir**
I run about the garden in joy!
**[05:38] Kazuma**
Yet these dolls keep marching
out of this dungeon,
**[05:40] Kazuma**
giving us humans a pretty hard time!
**[05:43] Vanir**
Truly?
**[05:44] Vanir**
I had intended to use them to
clear this dungeon of monsters...
**[05:48] Vanir**
If they've made their way outside,
there must be no monsters left.
**[05:53] Vanir**
In that case...
**[05:55] Vanir**
On to my next plan, I suppose.
**[05:59] Kazuma**
What are you after?!
**[06:01] Vanir**
How rude, coming from the man who
loafed around his room like a bear,
**[06:05] Vanir**
just because he was anxious about
the armor girl's late return home.
**[06:08] Kazuma**
Hey, cut that out!
**[06:10] Kazuma**
How can you say that like you were there?!
**[06:13] Kazuma**
And quit fidgeting, you!
**[06:15] Vanir**
You see, I have a rather sublime death wish.
**[06:20] Vanir**
First, I obtain a dungeon.
**[06:22] Vanir**
Then I station demons in each
room and set up traps.
**[06:25] Vanir**
A group of skilled adventurers
rises to the challenge!
**[06:29] Vanir**
After overcoming taxing trials,
**[06:31] Vanir**
the brave adventurers make their
way to the innermost chamber!
**[06:35] Vanir**
And of course, I am there to greet them!
**[06:37] Vanir**
"You've done well to make
it this far, adventurers!"
**[06:40] Vanir**
"Now, defeat me, and obtain
incredible riches!"
**[06:43] Vanir**
The final battle begins, at last!
**[06:46] Vanir**
And after a climactic confrontation,
**[06:50] Vanir**
they find a sealed treasure
box beyond my beaten body!
**[06:53] Vanir**
And when those adventurers,
who have endured so much, open it...
**[06:58] Vanir**
They find a piece of paper
that says, "You lose."
**[07:00] Vanir**
I watch as they are stunned to find it there...
**[07:06] Vanir**
That's how I wish to die.
**[07:11] Vanir**
In order to make this plan a reality,
**[07:13] Vanir**
I was going to use a friend's
store to save up money
**[07:15] Vanir**
to pay for the construction
of a massive dungeon...
**[07:18] Vanir**
But I was passing by this place,
**[07:20] Vanir**
and since it seemed uninhabited,
I figured it may as well be this dungeon.
**[07:25] Vanir**
But there's a truly vexing
magic circle beyond this room.
**[07:28] Vanir**
I can't even enter the chamber.
**[07:30] Kazuma**
*Her again...*
**[07:32] Vanir**
Oh, it was one of your comrades
who drew the magic circle?
**[07:36] Vanir**
Well, well...
**[07:39] Vanir**
Let's take a look.
**[07:44] Vanir**
Remarkable!
**[07:46] Vanir**
That priest comrade of yours created
this irritating magic circle!
**[07:51] Vanir**
I can see it... I see it quite clearly.
**[07:53] Vanir**
I can see the priest enjoying
some tea as she lazes around!
**[07:56] Kazuma**
*That little...*
**[07:58] Vanir**
And you, girl! You lost your bet to this man,
**[07:59] Vanir**
and have been overwhelmed with curiosity
about what he will demand of you,
**[08:03] Vanir**
to the point that you're
squirming in anticipation!
**[08:05] Darkness**
I am not overwhelmed or squirming!
**[08:07] Darkness**
Don't blurt stuff like that out!
**[08:09] Darkness**
Don't!
**[08:11] Vanir**
And you, the man who's
nervous about what exactly
**[08:13] Vanir**
to demand of this girl
once this matter is settled!
**[08:16] Kazuma**
I... I am not nervous!
**[08:18] Kazuma**
I-I'm totally not!
**[08:19] Vanir**
Why don't you two step aside?
**[08:21] Vanir**
After all, I have an iron-clad
rule about not killing humans.
**[08:26] Vanir**
Yes, I won't kill humans.
**[08:29] Vanir**
Not *humans*.
**[08:32] Vanir**
But the one who made this nuisance of a
magical circle is going to pay dearly for it!
**[08:37] Kazuma**
*He knows Aqua's identity?!*
**[08:39] Darkness**
If you're threatening Aqua,
then I cannot stand down!
**[08:42] Vanir**
It seems your head is as
hard as your muscles, girl!
**[08:45] Vanir**
If you leave right now,
**[08:46] Vanir**
I'm sure you can enjoy the crazy demands
you're expecting, with no interruptions!
**[08:52] Kazuma**
D-Don't listen to him!
**[08:53] Kazuma**
It's a demon's temptation!
Don't let him lead you astray!
**[08:56] Darkness**
I-I'm not being led anywhere!
**[08:57] Darkness**
You're the one who needs to consider
the time and place, Kazuma!
**[09:01] Kazuma**
* H-Huh? Am I the only one feeling*
* really tempted, then?*
**[09:04] Darkness**
Enough of this!
**[09:06] Darkness**
Hearing you talk feels like
it's driving me crazy!
**[09:10] Darkness**
Then why don't the two of you
take a break in that room
**[09:12] Darkness**
with the magic circle before heading home?
**[09:15] Darkness**
Kazuma, stop being so tempted!
**[09:17] Darkness**
We live in the same mansion!
**[09:19] Darkness**
What would we do if our relationship
took such a strange turn?!
**[09:21] Darkness**
Get a grip!
**[09:23] Kazuma**
She may look great and have the kind of
body I prefer, but she's still Darkness!
**[09:27] Kazuma**
I need to snap out of it!
**[09:28] Darkness**
Wh-When we get back,
I'll make you regret this!
**[09:34] Vanir**
For all your fire, your attacks
don't seem to be landing!
**[09:42] Vanir**
Where did that sneaky-looking lad go?
**[09:44] Vanir**
Someone like him is likely to be more of
a threat than a muscle-brained crusader.
**[09:49] Darkness**
What are you looking for?!
**[09:50] Darkness**
I'm the one you're fighting!
**[09:53] Vanir**
Nice try!
**[09:55] Kazuma**
Here's my chance!
**[09:56] Kazuma**
Got you!
**[10:07] Vanir**
It can't be...
**[10:08] Vanir**
I've been defeated here?
**[10:13] Darkness**
Did I finish him?
**[10:14] Kazuma**
Damn it, why was that thing lying on the floor?
**[10:18] Kazuma**
But... does this mean we really got him?!
**[10:22] Vanir**
And just as you're getting
your hopes up, you lose!
**[10:27] Vanir**
Did you think you had struck me down?
**[10:29] Vanir**
How unfortunate! I'm not even hurt.
**[10:33] Vanir**
Oh, my... The dark emotions from you two...
**[10:35] Vanir**
They are truly delicious!
**[10:39] Kazuma**
Darkness!
**[10:45] Kazuma**
Darkness? Hey! Answer me!
**[10:54] Vanir**
Boy, listen well! With my power—
**[10:57] Darkness**
What should I do, Kazuma?!
**[10:58] Darkness**
My body's been taken over!
**[11:00] Vanir**
Well, boy? If you think you can attack this girl...
**[11:03] Darkness**
I don't mind at all! Go ahead, show no mercy!
**[11:06] Darkness**
Quickly, now! This is a perfect situation!
**[11:09] Vanir**
Shut up, you!
**[11:10] Vanir**
What is your deal?!
**[11:14] Vanir**
Impossible... What is this—
**[11:16] Darkness**
Lovely—
**[11:17] Vanir**
...girl?!
**[11:18] Vanir**
How tough must her mind be?!
**[11:20] Darkness**
She's like the very model of a crusader!
**[11:22] Vanir**
Oh, pipe down!
**[11:27] Vanir**
To be able to resist my control...
**[11:29] Vanir**
You are most impressive, girl.
**[11:31] Darkness**
Aw, shucks...
**[11:32] Vanir**
However, the more you endure it,
**[11:33] Vanir**
the sooner you'll be wracked
with unbearable pain!
**[11:36] Darkness**
Wh-What?!
**[11:38] Vanir**
Now, how long can you endure it?
**[11:42] Vanir**
What is this?
**[11:44] Vanir**
Is she feeling joy?
**[11:46] Kazuma**
'Scuse me, coming through.
**[11:50] Darkness**
I will not let this pain get to me!
**[11:53] Vanir**
Such noble determination!
**[11:55] Vanir**
But resist much longer,
and your mind may be destroyed.
**[11:59] Vanir**
Woman, are you actually
enjoying this situation?
**[12:04] Kazuma**
Okay, Darkness, let's join Aqua
and get the hell out of here.
**[12:07] ---**
Wha—
**[12:08] Vanir**
Not another step, boy!
**[12:10] Darkness**
Kazuma, leave me behind and go.
**[12:12] Vanir**
Don't expect things to be that easy—
**[12:14] Darkness**
Oh, I've always wanted to say that!
**[12:17] Vanir**
You don't want to harm this girl
you find so attractive, do you?
**[12:22] Vanir**
If she continues to resist my power—
**[12:25] Darkness**
K-Kazuma, this mind-reading devil just
said something that piqued my interest...
**[12:29] Vanir**
Shut up!
**[12:35] Vanir**
This body was a mistake...
**[12:37] Darkness**
Hey, isn't it rude to call
someone's body a mistake?!
**[12:40] Vanir**
Oh, enough!
**[12:42] Vanir**
I'm leaving!
**[12:43] Kazuma**
Oh, we can't have that.
**[12:45] Vanir**
What is this talisman?
**[12:46] Darkness**
Wait, Kazuma... Isn't that...
**[12:48] Kazuma**
The sealing talisman Sena gave me.
**[12:51] Kazuma**
We'll head outside and have Aqua purify you.
**[12:54] Darkness**
Wha—
**[12:55] Darkness**
KONOSUBA!
**[12:58] Vanir**
Boy, this girl's resistance to my power
leaves her body in constant surging pain!
**[13:04] Vanir**
At this rate, her mind will be broken!
**[13:07] Darkness**
You heard him, Kazuma!
**[13:09] Darkness**
This is the most intense pain I've ever felt!
**[13:11] Darkness**
Just as I'd expect from one
of the Devil King's commanders!
**[13:13] Darkness**
I might just fall for him!
**[13:14] Kazuma**
Hang in there!
**[13:15] Kazuma**
Once we get to the surface,
we'll make you feel better!
**[13:18] Darkness**
Don't trouble yourself.
**[13:20] Kaz/Van**
What did you just say?
**[13:22] Darkness**
Don't trouble yourself.
**[13:24] Kazuma**
You really hung in there, Darkness!
**[13:27] Kazuma**
Darkness?
**[13:31] Vanir**
My domination is complete!
**[13:33] Kazuma**
Oh, no!
**[13:35] Vanir**
Now to give that priest of yours
something she'll never see coming!
**[13:40] Kazuma**
Darkness, snap out of it!
**[13:42] Kazuma**
You're better than this!
**[13:44] Vanir**
It's no use, boy!
**[13:45] Vanir**
Now, it's time for a heart-warming reunion
after having safely left the dungeon!
**[13:50] Vanir**
My loathsome nemesis...
**[13:52] Vanir**
It's time to see how you will deal with your
friend's body, now that I have control—
**[13:57] Aqua**
Sacred Exorcism!
**[14:04] Kazuma**
D-Darkness!
**[14:06] Kazuma**
Hey, don't just blast someone
with magic out of the blue!
**[14:09] Aqua**
Well, I felt an evil presence
coming, so I took a shot at it.
**[14:13] Kazuma**
One of the Devil King's commander's
has taken over Darkness's body!
**[14:17] Sena**
O-One of the Devil King's commanders?!
**[14:19] Aqua**
Ew! What the— Ugh!
**[14:21] Aqua**
This is definitely the stench
that comes from demons!
**[14:24] Aqua**
Darkness, you're so stanky!
**[14:27] Vanir**
First, I suppose I should introduce myself
**[14:29] Vanir**
to this priest who shares a name with
the infamous, obnoxious water goddess!
**[14:33] Vanir**
I am—
**[14:34] Darkness**
Aqua, I don't think it's
actually me who stinks!
**[14:37] Vanir**
I am Vani—
**[14:38] Darkness**
Kazuma, come smell me! I shouldn't stink!
**[14:41] Vanir**
Would you shut it?!
**[14:43] Vanir**
I am Vanir...
**[14:45] Vanir**
To unleash anti-demon
magic at first sight...
**[14:47] Vanir**
This is why everyone hates
the members of the Axis cult.
**[14:51] Vanir**
Have you never heard of etiquette?!
**[14:53] Aqua**
Wow, we've got a demon talking
about etiquette over here!
**[14:57] Aqua**
Aren't you just a parasite who'd fade
away without dark human emotions?
**[15:05] Aqua**
Sacred Highness Exorcism!
**[15:08] Vanir**
Nice try!
**[15:08] Kazuma**
Watch it!
**[15:09] Aqua**
Hey, Darkness, why are you dodging?!
**[15:12] Aqua**
Stand still!
**[15:13] Darkness**
Easy for you to say!
**[15:14] Megumin**
It's not fair!
**[15:15] Megumin**
I want one of those masks, too!
**[15:18] Megumin**
It appeals directly to my
Crimson Demon sense of values!
**[15:20] Kazuma**
Are you stupid?! The mask is his main body!
**[15:23] Sena**
It does match the description of the
all-seeing demon from a wanted poster!
**[15:26] Sena**
Everyone, apprehend him!
**[15:27] ---**
Yes, ma'am!
**[15:34] Aqua**
Come on, Darkness, stand still!
**[15:36] Aqua**
Do you want to be saved or not?!
**[15:38] Adventurers**
I never thought Darkness was this tough...
**[15:41] Adventurers**
I can't hit her! She deflects us
with her sword like we're nothing!
**[15:44] Vanir**
This body is quite functional.
**[15:47] Vanir**
It's strong and has plenty of stamina.
**[15:49] Vanir**
Not only that, but it has excellent resistance
against the pesky magic of the gods.
**[15:53] Darkness**
I'm sorry, everyone...
**[15:56] Vanir**
Now, keep it coming,
you pitiful adventuring clowns!
**[15:59] Adventurers**
Darkness! You finally land a
few hits with your sword
**[16:02] Adventurers**
and now you're all high and mighty?!
**[16:04] Adventurers**
I used to think you were the only
sane member of Kazuma's party!
**[16:07] Adventurers**
Surround her! Surround her!
Let's surround this scrub of a crusader!
**[16:12] Darkness**
The adventurers I usually have
cordial interactions with
**[16:15] Darkness**
are looking at me with such disdain...
**[16:17] Vanir**
I sense happiness for some reason.
What's going on here?
**[16:22] Megumin**
Please, do something!
**[16:24] Sena**
Satou-san, aren't you going to help?!
**[16:28] Aqua**
Kazuma!
**[16:29] Aqua**
Hey, I'm in trouble here!
**[16:32] Aqua**
Like, it might be the biggest trouble ever!
**[16:35] Aqua**
Kazuma-san! Kazuma-san!
**[16:39] Kazuma**
* I honestly feel like chewing*
* Sena out right now!*
**[16:41] Kazuma**
*I'm not the one who's always causing trouble!*
**[16:44] Kazuma**
*I just get dragged into it!*
**[16:46] Kazuma**
*And I'm supposed to have good luck?!*
**[16:48] Aqua**
Kazuma-san!
**[16:53] Kazuma**
Fine, damn it!
**[16:57] Kazuma**
Darkness, how can that demon
have you whipped already?!
**[17:01] Kazuma**
Have you always been such an easy woman?
**[17:04] Vanir**
It's no use! Your voice can't reach—
**[17:07] Darkness**
Who are you calling an easy woman?!
**[17:09] Darkness**
He doesn't have me whipped!
**[17:13] Vanir**
Such an iron will...
**[17:14] Kazuma**
I'm going to remove the seal on the mask!
**[17:17] Kazuma**
Then, even if it's just for a
second, take control from Vanir,
**[17:20] Kazuma**
take the mask off, and throw it away!
**[17:22] Vanir**
How does someone as puny as
you expect to remove the seal,
**[17:27] Vanir**
when I'm drawing out the full
potential of this girl's strength?
**[17:30] Darkness**
True. Right now, I don't feel
as if anyone could defeat me.
**[17:35] Varkniress**
If you can overpower me...
**[17:37] Varkniress**
...to take the sealing talisman...
**[17:38] Varkniress**
...and remove it...
**[17:39] Varkniress**
...then I challenge you...
**[17:40] Varkniress**
...to try it...
**[17:41] Varkniress**
...if you dare!
**[17:42] Varkniress**
Oh, shut up!
**[17:44] Varkniress**
Don't steal my big line!
**[17:49] Darkness**
Steal! Kazuma must be planning
to use his specialty, Steal!
**[17:53] Kazuma**
Hey, don't tell him the plan!
**[17:55] Aqua**
Kazuma, you've got me backing you up!
**[17:58] Aqua**
Handle this like a real hero!
**[18:00] Kazuma**
Hey, Darkness! How about another bet?
**[18:03] Kazuma**
If I win, in addition to my crazy demand,
**[18:07] Kazuma**
I'll also get to do something unbelievable!
**[18:10] Darkness**
At a time like this, you'd—
**[18:12] Vanir**
Hey, don't let him sweet-talk you!
**[18:14] Vanir**
Boost your magic power so
you can withstand his Steal.
**[18:16] Kazuma**
Darkness! Resist Vanir so that he can't move!
**[18:20] Vanir**
Don't think some mere adventurer's
Steal will work on me!
**[18:23] Kazuma**
Here we go!
**[18:24] Varkniress**
Come on!
**[18:28] Kazuma**
Tinder!
**[18:40] Darkness**
That's cheating, Kazuma! You coward!
**[18:42] Vanir**
You were actually able to
deceive an all-seeing demon...
**[18:45] Kazuma**
Come on, Darkness! Show him what you've got!
**[18:48] Darkness**
It won't come off!
**[18:50] ---**
What?!
**[18:51] Aqua**
What now, Kazuma-san?!
**[18:53] Aqua**
Should I go ahead and fire?
**[18:54] Kazuma**
No... Even if you do,
with Darkness's resistances...
**[19:00] Darkness**
Do it.
**[19:02] Darkness**
If Aqua's magic doesn't work,
it doesn't matter.
**[19:06] Darkness**
Then you can blast both of
us with explosion magic.
**[19:10] Megumin**
I couldn't!
**[19:11] Megumin**
My explosion magic has
grown even more powerful,
**[19:13] Megumin**
thanks to the experience I've gained!
**[19:16] Megumin**
Even you would be...
**[19:24] Darkness**
Vanir... It wasn't for long,
but the time we shared wasn't bad.
**[19:30] Darkness**
So I'm offering you a choice:
**[19:33] Darkness**
leave me and be purified,
**[19:36] Darkness**
or be struck by explosion magic with me.
**[19:40] Vanir**
For an agent of destruction like myself,
I couldn't ask for a sweeter offer.
**[19:44] Vanir**
To think my death wish
would play out like this...
**[19:51] Vanir**
My time possessing your
body was quite enjoyable.
**[19:58] Vanir**
I am a demon!
**[20:00] Vanir**
And I absolutely refuse to be
purified by the gods I oppose!
**[20:04] Darkness**
Now, Megumin!
**[20:09] Kazuma**
If this goes badly, I want
you to act as a witness
**[20:14] Kazuma**
and confirm that this was on my orders.
**[20:16] Kazuma**
I'll take full responsibility for this, too.
**[20:23] Kazuma**
Megumin!
**[20:29] Megumin**
The tower of rebellion
creeps upon man's world...
**[20:32] Megumin**
The unspoken faith displayed before me...
**[20:35] Megumin**
The time has come!
**[20:36] Megumin**
Now, awaken from your slumber,
**[20:38] Megumin**
and by my madness, be wrought!
**[20:41] Megumin**
Strike forth, Explosion!
**[20:54] Sena**
Adventurer, Satou Kazuma-dono!
**[20:57] Sena**
In addition to awarding you, and delivering
this letter of appreciation from the town,
**[21:01] Sena**
I wish to offer my sincere apologies for the
suspicions that were brought against you.
**[21:08] Kazuma**
*After the fight with Vanir,*
**[21:10] Kazuma**
* people didn't believe that someone*
* connected to the Devil King's army*
**[21:13] Kazuma**
* would go so far to defeat*
* one of its commanders.*
**[21:15] Kazuma**
* And so, the suspicions about me*
* being a spy were cleared up.*
**[21:19] Kazuma**
* Not having to worry about being*
* executed is a big relief.*
**[21:23] Sena**
And next, Lady Dustiness Ford Lalatina.
**[21:27] Sena**
The dedication you have shown in
this incident was magnificent,
**[21:30] Sena**
and for your efforts, which lived up
to the honor of the Dustiness name,
**[21:33] Sena**
the royal family is presenting
you with a letter of gratitude,
**[21:35] Sena**
and this armor from first-rate craftsmen
to replace the set you lost.
**[21:43] Kazuma**
*After being hit with Megumin's explosion magic,*
**[21:45] Kazuma**
*Darkness was badly hurt and weakened,*
**[21:47] Kazuma**
*and the armor she cherished was destroyed.*
**[21:50] Kazuma**
* Aqua's healing helped her recover*
* to where she is today, but...*
**[21:55] Crowd**
Congratulations, Lalatina!
**[21:57] Crowd**
You did great, Lalatina!
**[21:59] Crowd**
That's our Lalatina!
**[22:01] Crowd**
Lalatina! You're so cute, Lalatina!
**[22:05] Darkness**
Th-This kind of embarrassment isn't
the crazy thing I was hoping for...
**[22:10] Aqua**
Come on, Darkness, I think the
name Lalatina is really cute!
**[22:15] Aqua**
I'll chew Kazuma out for letting everyone
know your name, Lalatina, as a joke.
**[22:21] Aqua**
So please, have confidence in
your name, which is Lalatina!
**[22:25] Sena**
Now, for the adventurer
Satou Kazuma and his party...
**[22:30] Sena**
In addition to your valuable aid with the
destruction of the Mobile Fortress Destroyer,
**[22:35] Sena**
the defeat of the Devil King commander, Vanir,
**[22:38] Sena**
would have been impossible
without your contributions.
**[22:41] Sena**
Your debt, along with the cost
of repairs to the lord's manor,
**[22:46] Sena**
will be subtracted from your reward.
**[22:48] Sena**
After factoring in your debts,
**[22:51] Sena**
you will receive 40 million Eris
to celebrate your achievement!
**[23:02] Roughneck**
Look at how giddy they are.
**[23:04] Roughneck**
But a day like this every
once in a while ain't bad.
**[23:07] Aqua**
Nature's Beauty!
**[23:09] Kazuma**
*Right now...*
**[23:10] Kazuma**
* The heavy chains that had clung*
* to my body for so long are gone...*
**[23:21] Kazuma**
And I have obtained the wings of freedom!
***SIGN*** Quest Clear
***SIGN*** Investigate the strange activity in Keele's Dungeon
Defeat the Devil King Army Commander Archdemon Vanir
***SIGN*** Debt Fully Paid, Got 40 Million Eris
***SIGN*** Episode 6
***SIGN*** Goodbye to This Irritating Living World!
***SIGN*** Father, Mother. Are you doing well? I'm doing fine. I'm working hard as an adventurer every day. Huh? Party members? Of course I have some! We're all great friends, y'know? I'm not lying, okay? Seriously, you don't need to worry! Yunyun
**[23:31] Yunyun**
Father, Mother. Are you doing well?
**[23:34] Yunyun**
I'm doing fine.
**[23:35] Yunyun**
I'm working hard as an adventurer every day.
**[23:37] Yunyun**
Huh? Party members? Of course I have—
# E6 - Goodbye to This Irritating Living World!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6VN4G43R/goodbye-to-this-irritating-living-world)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Aqua**
No! No way!
**[00:06] Aqua**
It's still cold outside!
**[00:09] Aqua**
Why do you guys want to
go out there so badly?!
**[00:11] Megumin**
I can't cast explosion
magic unless I'm outside!
**[00:15] Darkness**
Monsters start to become
active as spring approaches,
**[00:17] Darkness**
so that means work for adventurers!
**[00:20] Aqua**
Are you guys children?!
**[00:21] Aqua**
Are you two basically little kids
who want to go play outside?!
**[00:24] Aqua**
If you want to go outside
so bad, go without me!
**[00:27] Megumin**
Who are you calling a little kid?!
**[00:29] Darkness**
You're acting far more
childish right now, Aqua!
**[00:32] Darkness**
At this rate...
**[00:33] Both**
You'll end up like *that*.
**[00:37] Aqua**
Okay, even I would rather
not end up like that...
**[00:41] Aqua**
But why don't you convince
that loser before me?!
**[00:44] Kazuma**
Listen, you three. Even-tempered as
I may be, I still get angry sometimes.
**[00:48] Kazuma**
Where do you get off calling
someone "that" and a loser?
**[00:51] Kazuma**
How rude can you be?
**[00:54] Aqua**
If you have a problem, why don't
you get out from under there first?
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! 2
***SIGN*** Episode 6 Goodbye to This Irritating Living World!
**[02:32] Kazuma**
*We defeated the demon Vanir,
one of the Devil King's commanders...*
**[02:38] Kazuma**
* But we weren't able to*
* savor our victory for long.*
**[02:42] Kazuma**
* Wiz is also one of the*
* Devil King's commanders.*
**[02:45] Kazuma**
* The fact that we had*
* slain one of her comrades*
**[02:48] Kazuma**
*was something that we had to tell her.*
**[02:51] (Flashback) Darkness**
I'll tell her about Vanir.
**[02:54] (Flashback) Darkness**
It wasn't for long, but we shared a
body and wreaked havoc together.
**[02:58] (Flashback) Darkness**
As a crusader in the service of Eris-sama,
**[03:01] (Flashback) Darkness**
I probably shouldn't say such a thing...
**[03:04] (Flashback) Darkness**
But I didn't dislike him.
**[03:16] (Flashback) Darkness**
Wiz, we need to tell you something...
**[03:18] (Flashback) Vanir**
Hey, welcome, folks!
**[03:19] (Flashback) Vanir**
Now, girl who had a distant look in her eyes
**[03:21] (Flashback) Vanir**
as she was in front of the store
spouting embarrassing nonsense...
**[03:23] (Flashback) Vanir**
There's something I must inform you of.
**[03:26] (Flashback) Vanir**
"But I didn't dislike him!"
**[03:28] (Flashback) Vanir**
About that... You see,
we demons have no gender,
**[03:31] (Flashback) Vanir**
so that embarrassing declaration of
your feelings is nothing I can—oh, my!
**[03:35] (Flashback) Vanir**
Now this is an intense swell
of dark emotions! Most savory!
**[03:39] (Flashback) Vanir**
What's the matter? You've curled up
and hidden your face in your knees.
**[03:41] (Flashback) Vanir**
Did you actually think that I had perished?!
**[03:44] (Flashback) Kazuma**
There, there...
**[03:46] (Flashback) Wiz**
I heard all about it, Kazuma-san.
**[03:48] (Flashback) Wiz**
Defeating Vanir-san has cleared up
those spying charges of yours.
**[03:51] (Flashback) Wiz**
Congratulations!
**[03:53] (Flashback) Kazuma**
That's great and all,
**[03:54] (Flashback) Kazuma**
but why is he totally fine after
taking a blast of explosion magic?
**[03:57] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Why isn't he hurt at all?!
**[03:59] (Flashback) Vanir**
When hit with such sorcery,
**[04:00] (Flashback) Vanir**
even one such as I couldn't escape unscathed.
**[04:03] (Flashback) Vanir**
Take a good look at my mask!
**[04:07] (Flashback) Vanir**
I lost one of my extra lives,
making me Vanir II!
**[04:11] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Quit messing around!
**[04:13] (Flashback) Wiz**
Vanir-san actually wanted to leave his post
as one of the Devil King's commanders.
**[04:16] (Flashback) Wiz**
So, currently, he doesn't maintain the
barrier around the Devil King's castle.
**[04:20] (Flashback) Wiz**
He should be harmless as a result.
**[04:23] (Flashback) Kazuma**
Y-You think he's harmless?
**[04:26] (Flashback) Vanir**
You, boy from a distant land...
**[04:29] (Flashback) Vanir**
I believe you would be well served
in assisting in our business.
**[04:32] (Flashback) Vanir**
I've got an excellent offer. Care to hear it?
**[04:36] Kazuma**
*Vanir's big moneymaking scheme*
**[04:39] Kazuma**
* was making stuff from my world*
* and selling it in this one.*
**[04:44] Kazuma**
*I just have to make and develop the products.*
**[04:46] Kazuma**
* The manufacturing and distribution*
* are Vanir's to handle.*
**[04:49] Kazuma**
* And the first idea for this plan was*
* the kotatsu I am currently under.*
**[04:54] Megumin**
We're all very impressed with the
furniture from your homeland, Kazuma.
**[04:58] Megumin**
But shouldn't we be getting back to work?
**[05:00] Darkness**
She's right, Kazuma.
**[05:03] Darkness**
Come on.
**[05:03] Kazuma**
Freeze!
**[05:05] Darkness**
Eek!
**[05:11] Megumin**
H-He actually fought back!
**[05:13] Megumin**
Kazuma, would you please give it a rest?!
**[05:16] Megumin**
Stop making such a fuss and—
**[05:19] Megumin**
Ow! My head...
**[05:23] Kazuma**
Don't underestimate me.
**[05:25] Kazuma**
I'm the Kazuma-san who's tangled with the
Devil King's commanders and other big shots.
**[05:28] Kazuma**
Try again after you've leveled up a bit!
**[05:33] Darkness**
Do you think your petty
tricks will really— Eek!
**[05:37] Megumin**
The theft of my magic power is a
crime deserving of a thousand—
**[05:40] Megumin**
So... tired...
**[05:45] Kazuma**
I get the feeling I could
take anyone on right now!
**[05:50] Kazuma**
Wait. We've got an emergency.
**[05:53] Kazuma**
I realize this might be asking a bit
much, but let's call a ceasefire.
**[05:57] Kazuma**
Sorry, but could you two lift
the mat under the kotatsu
**[05:59] Kazuma**
and carry me to the bathroom, please?
**[06:04] Kazuma**
That was easier than I thought.
**[06:06] Megumin**
Let's dump him and his kotatsu outside.
**[06:09] Darkness**
Good idea. Aqua, open the window, would you?
**[06:12] Kazuma**
Stop it! Do you people have no hearts?!
**[06:15] Kazuma**
H-Hey, cut it out! Wait, no—
**[06:16] Girls**
Heave-ho!
**[06:23] Kazuma**
Ugh, it's still so cold...
**[06:27] Aqua**
Fireplace... Sofa...
**[06:29] Darkness**
Kazuma, why are we taking this street?
**[06:32] Megumin**
This isn't the way to the guild.
**[06:37] Kazuma**
Did you think I was just roasting
under the kotatsu all this time?
**[06:40] Kazuma**
Hey!
**[06:42] Smith**
Welcome!
**[06:43] Kazuma**
Is it ready, Pops?
**[06:45] Kazuma**
Is my katana ready to go?!
**[06:47] Smith**
Yeah. I managed to finish it.
**[06:49] Smith**
I did make it in the shape you described...
**[06:52] Smith**
Here you go.
**[06:57] Smith**
I didn't really get the hardening
techniques you were going on about,
**[07:02] Smith**
but it was an interesting job anyway!
**[07:05] Ruffian**
O-ho...
**[07:06] Ruffian**
So that's your new partner, huh?
**[07:11] Kazuma**
My new partner.
**[07:14] Megumin**
When did you order a sword like that, Kazuma?
**[07:16] Kazuma**
I learned a smithing skill
from this guy a while back.
**[07:21] Darkness**
You mentioned needing that for
your new financial venture, right?
**[07:24] Kazuma**
And while I was at it,
**[07:25] Kazuma**
I made the order, figuring I
was due for a gear upgrade.
**[07:30] Smith**
You just need to write a name for it on
this talisman, and attach it to the handle.
**[07:34] Smith**
Make sure it's a good one!
**[07:37] Smith**
And then...
**[07:40] Smith**
Here's your full-plate armor.
**[07:42] Smith**
This is fancier than what most of the
adventurers around these parts have.
**[07:47] Smith**
Take good care of it.
**[07:49] Kazuma**
This is it! This is real
gear for a fantasy setting!
**[07:52] Ruffian**
I might've just witnessed
the birth of a new hero...
**[08:00] Ruffian**
KONOSUBA!
**[08:05] Megumin**
I guess clothes really do make the man.
**[08:07] Darkness**
Even most crusaders can't
equip this kind of armor!
**[08:11] Aqua**
Kazuma, do a pose with your sword!
**[08:22] Megumin**
Kazuma?
**[08:24] Kazuma**
First-rate warriors don't demonstrate
their techniques for show...
**[08:28] Darkness**
Too heavy to move in, huh?
**[08:30] Kazuma**
Could someone undo
the latches on the back?
**[08:33] Smith**
Well, better to use the gear
you're most familiar with, right?
**[08:37] Kazuma**
I guess I'll just have to
settle for a new weapon...
**[08:48] Kazuma**
I'm counting on you, partner!
**[09:07] Kazuma**
I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!
**[09:09] Kazuma**
Uh, w-well, thanks again.
**[09:29] Kazuma**
This is nothing like I imagined!
**[09:39] Megumin**
Your partner seems a lot shorter now.
**[09:42] Kazuma**
Shut up!
**[09:44] Kazuma**
I want to at least make
sure it has a cool name...
**[09:48] Kazuma**
Muramasa?
**[09:50] Kazuma**
Masamune? Kotetsu?
**[09:52] Aqua**
Kazuma! Megumin!
**[09:54] Aqua**
Hey!
**[09:55] Darkness**
There's a great quest here!
**[09:58] Luna**
These monsters are called Lizard Runners.
**[10:01] Luna**
When entering their mating period, the
males gather around the Princess Runner,
**[10:05] Luna**
forming a massive group,
**[10:07] Luna**
and then they compete for the
Princess Runner's affections.
**[10:11] Kazuma**
Compete?
**[10:13] Luna**
They run!
**[10:15] Luna**
In a huge group, trampling
anything that gets in their path.
**[10:19] Luna**
The fastest male becomes the King Runner,
**[10:22] Luna**
and the Princess Runner's mate.
**[10:24] Kazuma**
That sounds like a real handful...
**[10:26] Luna**
This quest involves getting
rid of the Lizard Runners.
**[10:30] Luna**
There are many of them,
so it may be dangerous...
**[10:34] Kazuma**
It's okay.
**[10:36] Kazuma**
No matter what monster it is,
it's no match for this guy and me.
**[10:40] Kazuma**
Isn't that right, my partner... uh...
**[10:43] Kazuma**
Kikuichimonji? Kogarasumaru?
**[10:45] Megumin**
Chunchunmaru.
**[10:47] Kazuma**
Say what, now?
**[10:48] Megumin**
I said Chunchunmaru.
**[10:50] Megumin**
This sword's name is Chunchunmaru.
**[10:52] Kazuma**
There's no way I can give
it such a goofy name!
**[10:55] Kazuma**
As my preferred blade,
it needs a suitably cool name...
**[11:03] Megumin**
From now on, this sword
is named Chunchunmaru.
**[11:06] Megumin**
What the hell did you just do?!
**[11:10] Megumin**
Listen...
**[11:12] Kazuma**
Even if I do I defeat the
Devil King with this sword,
**[11:15] Kazuma**
"The legendary hero's sword, Chunchunmaru"
**[11:18] Kazuma**
is what it's gonna say on
the plaque in the museum.
**[11:22] Megumin**
I gave it such a cool name
for you. What's your problem?
***SIGN*** Eliminate the group of Lizard Runners
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
**[11:33] Kazuma**
Everybody ready?
**[11:37] Aqua**
I'm ready to go anytime!
**[11:40] Darkness**
Thanks to Aqua's support magic,
**[11:42] Darkness**
I can endure as many of them as needed!
**[11:44] Megumin**
And if any get through, just leave them to me.
**[11:48] Megumin**
I'll blow them all to smithereens.
**[11:51] Kazuma**
All right, stick to the plan!
**[11:53] Kazuma**
First, I'll Snipe the King
and Princess Runners...
**[11:58] Kazuma**
With those two down,
**[11:59] Kazuma**
the rest of the Lizard
Runners should disperse,
**[12:02] Kazuma**
meaning we can ignore the rest.
**[12:04] Kazuma**
If my Snipe fails, and they head this way,
**[12:07] Kazuma**
Darkness will hold them up so that I can
Snipe the King and Princess Runners.
**[12:15] Kazuma**
And if any manage to get past her,
**[12:16] Kazuma**
Megumin will blow them all away
before they can surround us,
**[12:20] Kazuma**
and I can pick off any
survivors from up here.
**[12:24] Kazuma**
Aqua, focus on backing us up!
**[12:27] Kazuma**
All right, here we go!
**[12:37] Kazuma**
I can tell that's the Princess, but...
**[12:40] Kazuma**
Hey, Aqua! Which one's the King?
**[12:43] Aqua**
Probably the most high-and-mighty-looking one?
**[12:45] Kazuma**
I was a fool for even asking you.
**[12:48] Aqua**
I know! The King is the fastest one, right?
**[12:49] Aqua**
Oh?
**[12:51] ---**
Uh-huh.
**[12:51] Aqua**
I can use magic to get their attention,
**[12:54] Aqua**
and the first one to get here is the King!
**[12:56] Kazuma**
Wha?!
**[12:57] Kazuma**
Hey, what are you sayi—
**[12:58] Aqua**
Force Fire!
**[13:10] Kazuma**
No! You freaking idiot!
**[13:13] Kazuma**
Are you not satisfied unless you
screw up every single time?!
**[13:16] Kazuma**
We could've neutralized them by just
taking out the King and Princess,
**[13:18] Kazuma**
so why call the whole group here?!
**[13:21] Aqua**
What's your problem?!
**[13:22] Aqua**
I was just trying to help! Don't yell at me!
**[13:26] Aqua**
And if I have to make up for it later,
it'll just be the same as always!
**[13:29] Aqua**
I'm going to get messed up by
those Runners and be left crying!
**[13:33] Aqua**
I get it, okay?! It happens every time!
**[13:36] Aqua**
Go on, if you wanna kill me, just do it—
**[13:45] Kazuma**
Don't lie down there!
**[13:47] Kazuma**
They'll actually trample you to death!
**[13:52] Kazuma**
Got him!
**[13:59] Kazuma**
Hey! I beat the one that
looked like the King,
**[14:02] Kazuma**
but now they're even more violent!
**[14:04] Aqua**
The lizards get excited when a King
**[14:05] Aqua**
is defeated, because it means they have
a chance to become the new King.
**[14:10] Aqua**
You need to take down the
Princess Runner first.
**[14:13] Kazuma**
You could've said that sooner!
**[14:15] Megumin**
Leave it to me!
**[14:17] Kazuma**
Megumin!
**[14:20] Megumin**
Taste the power of my explosion magic!
**[14:23] Megumin**
Explosion!
**[14:26] Megumin**
My magic power!
**[14:28] Megumin**
Kazuma! I don't have enough magic
power to activate my explosion magic!
**[14:28] Megumin**
Yes?!
**[14:31] Kazuma**
Huh?! Why wouldn't you...
**[14:34] Kazuma**
Wait...
**[14:35] Kazuma**
It's my fault?!
**[14:39] Darkness**
Come at me!
**[14:41] Kazuma**
Darkness!
**[14:46] Aqua**
Kazuma-san! Kazuma-san—
**[14:49] Kazuma**
Darkness, just hang in there!
I'll take her down now!
**[14:53] Darkness**
D-Don't worry about me!
**[14:55] Darkness**
T-Take your time!
**[15:19] Darkness**
Snipe!
**[15:29] Darkness**
That was a close one...
**[15:48] Megumin**
K-Kazuma?! Are you all right?!
**[15:51] Megumin**
Aqua! Kazuma took a scary-looking fall!
**[15:54] Megumin**
Healing magic...
**[16:03] Eris**
Try to live a bit more carefully, okay?
**[16:05] Eris**
It wasn't easy to find a work-around
to let you come back to life last time.
**[16:09] Kazuma**
I'm sorry. I have no excuse
for what happened this time.
**[16:14] Eris**
You've taken a job as an adventurer,
**[16:17] Eris**
so I know that danger is
part of the lifestyle...
**[16:20] Eris**
But you were a little too careless this time.
**[16:22] Kazuma**
Um, were the others okay after I died?
**[16:26] Eris**
Yes.
**[16:27] Eris**
Senpai was lying down when it happened,
**[16:29] Eris**
so she was trampled and kicked by
the lizards, and started crying...
**[16:33] Eris**
But as Darkness was holding them back,
**[16:35] Eris**
with the Princess Runner slain,
the rest of the group dispersed.
**[16:39] Eris**
Megumin-san is fine,
thanks to Darkness's protection.
**[16:42] Eris**
Right now, Senpai is repairing your body.
**[16:46] Kazuma**
What a relief!
**[16:48] Kazuma**
In that case, is it okay if I
wait here with you for a bit?
**[16:52] Eris**
That's fine, but... you seem awfully calm.
**[16:56] Kazuma**
Well, I've been through
this a few times already.
**[17:10] Kazuma**
Don't you get bored in this big, empty room?
**[17:13] Eris**
If I'm bored,
**[17:15] Eris**
then that means everyone is safe and well.
**[17:18] Eris**
So having nothing to do is ideal for me.
**[17:22] Kazuma**
*What is this? Oh, man. My chest hurts...*
**[17:25] Kazuma**
*That's it!*
**[17:27] Kazuma**
* This is what my life in a*
* parallel world was lacking!*
**[17:32] Kazuma**
*They're all good-looking enough,*
**[17:36] Kazuma**
*as far as looks go, anyway...*
**[17:39] Kazuma**
*But I'm not after sex appeal.*
**[17:41] Kazuma**
*I want a kind, sensible girl!*
**[17:44] Kazuma**
* Yes! This is where my*
* main heroine was hidden!*
**[17:48] Eris**
To be honest, I'm not here all the time.
**[17:53] Eris**
Every now and then, I sneak off
to the surface to have some fun.
**[17:56] Eris**
That's a secret between us, okay?
**[18:02] Aqua**
*Kazuma! Kazuma, can you hear me?*
**[18:05] Aqua**
* I cast Resurrection,*
* so you can come back now.*
**[18:09] Aqua**
*Have Eris open the gate!*
**[18:12] Kazuma**
I'll be back a little later!
**[18:14] Kazuma**
I want to talk with Eris-sama a bit!
**[18:17] Kazuma**
Just keep my body safe!
**[18:21] Aqua**
* What?! Quit being stupid and*
* get your butt back here!*
**[18:25] Aqua**
* Hurry and level up so you can beat the Devil*
* King and get me back to the heavenly realm!*
**[18:30] Kazuma**
*The Devil King, huh?*
**[18:32] Kazuma**
* If I come back to life,*
* will I really be able to accomplish*
**[18:35] Kazuma**
* something as ridiculous as defeating*
* the Devil King with those three?*
**[18:38] Aqua**
*Hey, Kazuma! Can you hear me?*
**[18:38] Kazuma**
* Let's say I do work hard. Will I*
* develop some strange new power*
**[18:42] Kazuma**
* that conveniently lets*
* me beat the Devil King?*
**[18:42] Aqua**
*Eris, what did you say to him?*
**[18:44] Kazuma**
* I'm pretty sure this harsh world*
* won't make it that easy.*
**[18:44] Aqua**
*Kazuma, don't worry about what the
goddess of padded chests has to say!*
**[18:47] Kazuma**
*I'm probably going to die many more times.*
**[18:47] Aqua**
*There's no way of telling
what else she's lying about!*
**[18:50] Kazuma**
* And what do I even stand*
* to gain for my efforts?*
**[18:51] Aqua**
*She's probably as phony about other stuff
as she is her boobs, so be careful!*
**[18:55] Aqua**
*If you want, I can tell you
even crazier things about her!*
**[18:55] Eris**
Um, Kazuma-san—
**[18:58] Aqua**
*The padded goddess down there actually—*
**[19:00] Kazuma**
Hey, Aqua!
**[19:02] Kazuma**
I'm sick of life, so I'm gonna be
reborn and start over as a baby.
**[19:07] Kazuma**
Give the others my regards!
**[19:11] Aqua**
* What are you even talking about?!*
* Wait just a minute!*
**[19:15] Kazuma**
Well, that being the case,
if you could help me out here...
**[19:18] Kazuma**
I don't want to be too selfish,
**[19:20] Kazuma**
but I'd like to be born as a man again.
**[19:22] Kazuma**
Also, I'd like a family with a pretty older
stepsister and a cute younger stepsister!
**[19:27] Eris**
W-W-Wait a second!
**[19:30] Aqua**
* Kazuma, Darkness says she's gonna doodle*
* on your face if you don't come back soon!*
**[19:35] Aqua**
* She's got a pen in her hand*
* and looks really excited!*
**[19:38] Kazuma**
* Th-That's not enough to*
* make me change my mind.*
**[19:41] Kazuma**
*I'm already dead! Do whatever you want.*
**[19:44] Aqua**
* Megumin, what are you doing? What are*
* you doing with Kazuma's clothes?*
**[19:47] Aqua**
*Huh? Megumin? Wait... Megumin?!*
**[19:49] Kazuma**
Hey! Cut it out!
What are you doing to my body?!
**[19:52] Kazuma**
You shouldn't mess around with
dead bodies! It's bad karma!
**[19:55] Aqua**
*Megumin! Megumin?!*
**[19:57] Aqua**
*Kazuma-san! Come back! Come back, now!*
**[20:00] Kazuma**
Hey, cut it out!
**[20:01] Kazuma**
Aqua, stop Megumin! Stop—
**[20:03] Kazuma**
Eris-sama, please, open the gate!
**[20:14] Eris**
Well, Kazuma-san...
**[20:15] Eris**
I'll be praying you don't
find your way back here.
**[20:19] Kazuma**
Eris-sama... I...
**[20:21] Eris**
Have a safe trip.
**[20:24] Kazuma**
I don't mind if they're padded!
**[20:34] Kazuma**
Hey. What're you doing?
**[20:37] Kazuma**
Apart from your explosion
obsession and goofy name,
**[20:39] Kazuma**
I figured you had more common
sense than the other two.
**[20:42] Kazuma**
What the hell did you do to me?
**[20:45] Megumin**
If you have some problem with
my name, then let's hear it.
**[20:48] Megumin**
I did it because you made that
dumb joke about not coming back.
**[20:52] Megumin**
The next time you try
something that foolish,
**[20:54] Megumin**
it's gonna be even worse, you hear?
**[21:05] Aqua**
You'd better not expect a sacred goddess
like me to explain what she did.
**[21:09] Kazuma**
Seriously, what did she do to me?
**[21:21] Kazuma**
Kinda feels like...
**[21:31] Kazuma**
Megumin! Where the hell is Megumin?!
**[21:34] Darkness**
She said she'd be staying at
Yunyun's place for a few days—
**[21:38] Kazuma**
Pipe down!
**[21:38] Aqua**
Y'know, Kazuma...
**[21:39] Kazuma**
What?!
**[21:40] Aqua**
Self-esteem is a good thing,
**[21:42] Aqua**
but I have to question this
kind of self-flattery.
**[21:44] Kazuma**
S-Stupid!
**[21:46] Kazuma**
You were there when
Megumin wrote this on me!
**[21:50] Kazuma**
Damn it all!
**[21:52] Kazuma**
What exactly are you calling
the holy sword Excalibur?!
***SIGN*** To Funifura-san and Dodonko-san in the Crimson Demon Village. How are you doing? I'm doing well. Right now, I'm an adventurer with some friends in the town of Axel. Our members consist of an adventurer who is just starting out, an arch priest girl, and a crusader girl. It's true. Also, Megumin has no friends. I'd hate to end up like that. -Yunyun
***SIGN*** Episode 7
***SIGN*** An Invitation for This Knucklehead!
**[23:32] Yunyun**
To Funifura-san and Dodonko-san
in the Crimson Demon Village.
**[23:34] Yunyun**
How are you doing? I'm doing well.
**[23:37] Yunyun**
Right now, I'm an adventurer with
some friends in the town of—
# E7 - An Invitation for This Knucklehead!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRNQ5MW8R/an-invitation-for-this-knucklehead)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:08] A**
I've made some of the finest
quality tea, Kazuma-san.
**[00:12] K**
Quite.
**[00:18] K**
This is hot water.
**[00:19] A**
Oh, how careless of me.
**[00:23] K**
Could it perhaps be that
you purified the tea?
**[00:26] A**
I'm ever so sorry, Kazuma-san.
**[00:28] K**
We simply need to remake the tea.
**[00:30] K**
Thank you, Aqua. I'll finish this as it is.
**[00:35] K**
Yes, it's hot water!
**[00:37] M**
You're freaking me out!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! 2
***SIGN*** Episode 7 An Invitation for This Knucklehead!
**[02:11] M**
I'll apologize for what
happened the other day!
**[02:13] M**
So please, turn back to normal, Kazuma!
**[02:16] K**
The other day?
**[02:18] (Flashback) K**
What exactly are you calling
the holy sword Excalibur?!
**[02:22] K**
Oh, that matter.
**[02:24] K**
The wealthy don't have
time for such quibbles.
**[02:26] K**
That aside, would you care to
join us for tea, Megumin?
**[02:30] K**
We've happened upon some fine tea leaves.
**[02:33] M**
I'm so sorry! So please, turn back to normal!
**[02:37] M**
You're being really creepy right now!
**[02:40] K**
I have no idea what you mean.
**[02:42] K**
I'm acting the same as I always do.
**[02:44] A**
The finest quality tea is ready
once again, Kazuma-san.
**[02:52] K**
This is also hot water.
**[02:55] K**
You must have purified it again.
**[02:56] A**
Oh, my. How careless of me!
**[03:02] K**
No matter. It simply needs to be remade again.
**[03:04] K**
Thank you, Aqua. I'll finish this as it is.
**[03:09] D**
What happened was...
**[03:10] (Flashback) K**
That little loli brat!
**[03:12] (Flashback) K**
When she gets back, I'll skin her alive!
**[03:14] (Flashback) K**
I swear! I swear I will!
**[03:17] (Flashback) K**
I'll put her through something
that'll even make someone
**[03:20] (Flashback) K**
as tough as her squirm
and cry for forgiveness!
**[03:22] (Flashback) D**
R-Really?
**[03:23] (Flashback) D**
And what exactly is this thing that will
make even Megumin cry for mercy?
**[03:26] (Flashback) A**
Would you pipe down? It's too early.
**[03:28] (Flashback) A**
Why can't you all be as composed as I am?
**[03:31] (Flashback) A**
I haven't even moved from
this spot since yesterday,
**[03:34] (Flashback) A**
apart from taking a bath.
**[03:36] (Flashback) K**
I don't wanna hear criticism from the
failure who's vegging out all day long!
**[03:40] (Flashback) K**
Damn it! I'm gonna make her pay!
**[03:42] (Flashback) K**
I can already picture her sweet tears!
**[03:46] (Flashback) D**
Could you explain exactly why
she'll be crying, though?!
**[03:51] (Flashback) K**
There she is!
**[03:53] (Flashback) D**
Details—
**[03:53] (Flashback) K**
Megumin, you little—
**[03:57] (Flashback) V**
Did you think it was the crazy
little Crimson Demon girl?
**[04:00] (Flashback) V**
How unfortunate! It is I!
**[04:02] (Flashback) V**
With my shrewd eye for business,
**[04:04] (Flashback) V**
I've come to negotiate a deal in
the place of my dimwitted shopkeep!
**[04:07] (Flashback) V**
Now, prostrate yourself
with joy at my arrival,
**[04:10] (Flashback) V**
and show me that which you would
have us sell in our establishment!
**[04:14] (Flashback) A**
Hey, wait one second...
How'd you get inside the mansion?
**[04:18] (Flashback) V**
Oh, that puny thing?
**[04:21] (Flashback) V**
Was that supposed to be a barrier?
**[04:24] (Flashback) V**
It was incredibly weak.
**[04:26] (Flashback) V**
I thought it was a failed experiment
by some fledgling priest!
**[04:31] (Flashback) V**
Oh, how rude of me!
**[04:32] (Flashback) V**
It seems that, with my immense strength,
**[04:34] (Flashback) V**
simply passing through it was
enough to make it collapse!
**[04:40] (Flashback) A**
Oh, my!
**[04:41] (Flashback) A**
Your body seems to be on the verge of
collapse, Mr. Immensely Strong Demon!
**[04:47] (Flashback) A**
Whatever will we do?
**[04:48] (Flashback) A**
Aren't you supposed to be a duke of Hell?
**[04:51] (Flashback) A**
And to think, that little barrier
could put you in this state!
**[04:55] (Flashback) V**
This body is merely animated earth.
**[04:58] (Flashback) V**
There are countless replacements.
**[05:00] (Flashback) V**
I just found myself curious about that
flimsy thing posted around the mansion.
**[05:04] (Flashback) V**
I suppose, for the botched work of a
fledgling priest, it was quite impressive.
**[05:09] (Flashback) V**
For a barrier created by a
*human*, beginner priest, that is!
**[05:14] (Flashback) K**
Guys, why don't we calm down a little?
**[05:18] (Flashback) A**
Hey, Kazuma.
**[05:19] (Flashback) K**
Yeah?
**[05:19] (Flashback) A**
Were you building that kotatsu and whatever
else to do business with this *thing*?
**[05:24] (Flashback) K**
Yeah...
**[05:24] (Flashback) A**
With a parasite who has to suck on negative
human emotions to barely manage existing?
**[05:29] (K**
You look pretty sinister yourself right now.
**[05:29] (Flashback) A**
Oh, gosh! It's so funny, I forgot to laugh!
**[05:33] (K**
But you are laughing.
**[05:34] (Flashback) V**
We demons are particular about contracts,
**[05:37] (Flashback) V**
so you can trust I'll fulfill things on my end.
**[05:39] (Flashback) V**
I'm not like those who say,
"Believe in me and be saved,"
**[05:41] (Flashback) V**
and seek to prey on the pure of heart...
**[05:43] (Flashback) V**
Gathering believers with
sweet, hollow promises,
**[05:45] (Flashback) V**
only to then collect a tithe as a means
of robbing them of their money!
**[05:50] (Flashback) V**
What was their catchphrase again?
**[05:53] (Flashback) V**
Oh, right...
**[05:54] (Flashback) V**
"God is always watching over you," I believe?
**[05:59] (Flashback) V**
Well, my goodness! It turns out...
**[06:01] (Flashback) V**
I may have borne witness to this
god, based on that description!
**[06:05] (Flashback) V**
He was arrested for peeping!
**[06:07] (Flashback) V**
Perhaps this fellow who was watching over
toilets and bath houses with a tepid gaze
**[06:11] (Dust**
You've got it all wrong!
**[06:11] (Flashback) V**
was actually a god?
**[06:18] (Flashback) A**
Sacred Exorcism!
**[06:20] (Flashback) K**
Watch it!
**[06:23] (Flashback) Vanir**
And a-shedding I go!
**[06:31] (Flashback) A**
This is it, right? This is your real body?!
**[06:33] (Flashback) A**
Now what're you going to
do?! What can you do?!
**[06:37] (Flashback) V**
Even if you destroy this mask—
**[06:39] (Flashback) V**
See here, cut that out! Don't try
to take it off while I'm talking!
**[06:40] (K**
Hey, easy there!
**[06:42] K**
Would you two calm down?
**[06:43] (Flashback) V**
Let me finish what I was saying first!
**[06:45] K**
KONOSUBA!
**[06:47] (Flashback) V**
Let's begin the meeting, then.
**[06:49] (Flashback) V**
We'd previously agreed on
splitting the profits, but...
**[06:54] (Flashback) V**
How about it, boy?
**[06:55] (Flashback) V**
Would you care to sell the intellectual
property rights to these designs instead?
**[06:59] (Flashback) V**
I'll buy them for three hundred million eris.
**[07:01] (Flashback) Trio**
Three hundred million?!
**[07:02] (Flashback) K**
That's... enough to live on without
needing a job, isn't it?
**[07:06] (Flashback) V**
If you'd prefer monthly profit sharing,
I can offer you one million eris a month.
**[07:09] (Flashback) Trio**
A million a month?!
**[07:11] (Flashback) K**
There's no guarantee they'll
sell indefinitely, though...
**[07:13] (Flashback) K**
Is it wiser to take the
three hundred mil?
**[07:15] (Flashback) K**
But wait...
**[07:16] (Flashback) K**
With a million a month, we wouldn't have to
worry about slowly depleting a single sum.
**[07:21] (Flashback) V**
Well, you can take your time considering it.
**[07:21] K**
A million a month?
**[07:23] (Flashback) (A**
I'm worried about things at the
store, so I'll be taking my leave.
**[07:23] (A**
The amount of fancy bubbly
I could buy with that...
**[07:27] (Flashback) A**
And I'm worried about your nasty
stench stinking up my holy abode!
**[07:30] (Flashback) A**
Get out! Hurry up and get lost!
**[07:38] K**
It's hot water again.
**[07:40] A**
Oh, how silly of me!
**[07:43] D**
And they've been like that ever since.
**[07:44] (K**
Why don't you try making it again?
**[07:46] M**
That explains the phony air of wealth.
**[07:47] (K**
You can be so silly!
**[07:49] M**
Well, it's wonderful that
we have more money now.
**[07:51] M**
Anyway, why don't we
go take on a kill quest?
**[07:54] K**
Huh? Oh, please. What are you saying?
**[07:57] K**
Why should I bother working when I'm
on the verge of making a fortune?
**[08:03] K**
I mean, I put together good gear,
made a plan, and took on a quest,
**[08:07] K**
and I still ended up dying again!
**[08:08] K**
I've decided that I'll make my living
doing business from now on.
**[08:11] K**
No more dangerous adventurer stuff!
Time for a nice, room-temperature life!
**[08:15] A**
Say, Kazuma-san, that would
actually be a bit of a problem.
**[08:19] A**
If you don't defeat the Devil King,
it would actually be a real problem for me.
**[08:22] K**
In that case, why don't
we make a ton of money
**[08:25] K**
and hire some incredibly strong adventurers?!
**[08:27] K**
Then we'll have them help
us defeat the Devil King!
**[08:30] K**
We conquer the Devil King's castle
leading an army of adventurers!
**[08:34] K**
How about it?! It actually sounds
plausible for once, doesn't it?!
**[08:36] A**
That's it! Nice one, Kazuma-san!
**[08:39] A**
I can see you slapping
**[08:40] A**
adventurers' faces with wads of
cash as you order them around,
**[08:42] A**
and stealing the finishing blow after
they've weakened the Devil King enough!
**[08:48] K**
That's exactly it!
**[08:49] K**
I guess knowing me the longest
means you know me the best!
**[08:55] Megumin**
Using the power of money
to defeat the Devil King...
**[08:57] Megumin**
I can't accept it! I refuse to!
**[09:00] Megumin**
What exactly do you think the Devil King is?!
**[09:03] Megumin**
A force like the Devil King is meant to be
fought by awakening to a hidden power,
**[09:07] Megumin**
and then defeating him
after an epic final battle!
**[09:09] Megumin**
And what do I hear you talking about?!
Just hiring strong adventurers to defeat him?!
**[09:13] Megumin**
Come on, Darkness,
say something to— Darkness?
**[09:17] D**
Oh, it's just, seeing Kazuma gradually
becoming more and more pathetic
**[09:21] D**
got me wondering just how big a
scumbag he'll be in the future...
**[09:25] M**
Ugh! What am I supposed to do?!
**[09:27] K**
Don't group me with the pervert over there.
**[09:30] K**
Anyway, I died of a broken neck, remember?
**[09:33] K**
Just let me relax until I've healed fully.
**[09:37] M**
I understand. Why don't we see
to healing your injury, then?
**[09:41] K**
Eh, it's fine. If I just slack
off long enough, it'll heal.
**[09:43] (D**
Oh, boy!
**[09:45] M**
Let's go right away!
**[09:47] M**
We'll head to the city of water
and hot springs, Arcanretia!
**[09:50] K**
Don't mind my injury—
**[09:52] K**
Did you say hot springs?
**[09:54] A**
Did you just say Arcanretia?
**[09:56] A**
Did you say we're going to Arcanretia,
the city of water and hot springs?
**[10:00] K**
H-Hot springs, eh?
**[10:02] K**
I guess we're all exhausted from
fighting so many tough enemies,
**[10:06] K**
so it can't hurt to splurge
a bit on a hot springs trip.
**[10:09] A**
Kazuma-san, why did you sound
so monotone saying that?
**[10:12] A**
KO!
**[10:13] A**
NOSUBA!
**[10:15] A**
Is everybody ready?
**[10:17] K**
You bet! I'm all set to go!
**[10:19] K**
Man, how long do those two plan
to sleep? And they call us losers!
**[10:25] A**
I'm gonna go wake them up.
**[10:28] A**
Kazuma, head to where
we're boarding the wagons
**[10:30] A**
and secure the best seats!
**[10:32] K**
All right, got it!
**[10:36] V**
Hey, welcome!
**[10:37] V**
Oh? What brings you by so early?
**[10:40] K**
Going on a little hot springs trip.
**[10:42] K**
So, about our deal...
**[10:44] K**
It'll have to wait until I get back.
**[10:46] V**
Is that all?
**[10:48] V**
Well, take the chance to relax and enjoy
your anticipation of mixed bathing.
**[10:52] K**
I-I-I'm not anticipating that!
**[10:55] K**
I just wanted to go because
my neck still hurts...
**[10:59] K**
Wait, why is Wiz all burnt up?
**[11:05] (Flashback) V**
What... in the world?!
**[11:07] (Flashback) Wiz**
These things are really amazing!
**[11:10] (Flashback) Wiz**
They'll sell! I'm sure
they'll fly off the shelves!
**[11:12] (Flashback) Wiz**
So, Vanir-san, please stop
making your way toward me
**[11:16] (Flashback) Wiz**
while preparing a Murder Ray!
**[11:22] V**
So I was loading these pieces of junk
into boxes, hoping to return them.
**[11:27] V**
Wanna buy one?
**[11:28] K**
What is it? Some kind of magic item?
**[11:30] V**
It's a portable toilet accessory that lets
you deal with nature's call while on the road.
**[11:34] V**
It even uses running water to grant
a degree of privacy by making sound.
**[11:38] K**
What the heck?! That's awesome!
**[11:39] K**
Its flaw is that the sound it creates to mask
your business is so loud, it attracts monsters,
**[11:44] K**
and the mechanism for generating water is so
powerful that it causes a localized disaster.
**[11:49] K**
Does nothing in this store
work without any problems?!
**[11:54] V**
Unfortunately, the dimwitted owner
**[11:55] V**
has a unique gift when it comes to
stocking completely useless merchandise.
**[12:00] V**
As soon as I take my eyes off her,
she purchases the most bizarre things...
**[12:05] V**
Actually, boy, you said you were
going to the hot springs, didn't you?
**[12:15] Vendors**
Anyone hungry?
**[12:17] A**
Hey! I told you to go
ahead and save us seats!
**[12:21] A**
Wait, what's that on your back?
**[12:25] A**
KONOSUBA!
**[12:27] YY**
Can you wrap this as a gift?
**[12:30] Vendor**
Sure thing!
**[12:32] YY**
E-Excuse me!
**[12:34] YY**
Now, today we settle our vendetta, Megumin!
**[12:38] YY**
Prepare yourself!
**[12:42] YY**
H-Hello?
**[12:45] A**
Babysitting, huh?
**[12:47] A**
Well, that's fine.
**[12:48] A**
But she's kind of fading away.
**[12:52] K**
Hey! Is she gonna be okay?!
**[12:54] K**
Healing magic... wait, that'd have
the opposite effect on the undead!
**[12:58] D**
A trip...
**[13:00] D**
Father once took me to the capital
when I was a chi— Aiiieee!
**[13:08] W**
Huh?
**[13:09] W**
Oh, it's Kazuma-san.
**[13:10] K**
It was an emergency!
**[13:13] K**
You're the one with the most
vitality in this group!
**[13:16] A**
Hey, Kazuma!
**[13:18] A**
Let's take this wagon!
**[13:20] A**
From the look of it,
it's the most comfortable!
**[13:23] A**
By the way, I get a window seat.
**[13:25] A**
I reserve the seat with the
best view of the scenery!
**[13:27] A**
Go on, Kazuma, buy our tickets!
**[13:29] A**
Make it quick so no one else
can buy the seats on that wagon!
**[13:38] A**
Hey, mister, why is one seat already filled?
**[13:41] A**
What is this?
**[13:42] Driver**
That's a baby red dragon, miss.
**[13:45] Driver**
I was already paid for a single seat, so...
**[13:48] Driver**
It'll be uncomfortable, but one of you
will have to bear with riding in the back.
**[13:54] K**
In that case...
**[13:56] A**
Rock-paper-scissors!
**[13:57] A**
I think rock-paper-scissors is the
best way to handle such things!
**[14:01] W**
Um, if that's the case, I can just sit in the—
**[14:04] K**
No, Wiz. Let's give everyone a chance.
**[14:06] K**
Sounds good, Aqua. Rock-paper-scissors, huh?
**[14:09] A**
Okay, here we go!
**[14:11] A**
Rock-paper-scissors!
**[14:14] K**
Looks like I'm clear.
**[14:15] A**
Wait!
**[14:16] A**
No one said it was by elimination!
**[14:19] A**
The five of us play until
a single loser is decided!
**[14:23] K**
You wanna just play against me, then?
**[14:25] K**
We'll play three times, and if I lose
even once, I'll sit in the back.
**[14:30] A**
You're serious?
**[14:31] K**
Yep.
**[14:31] A**
So, do you even know
how probability works?
**[14:33] K**
Yep.
**[14:34] A**
It's next to impossible for
you to win three in a row!
**[14:39] K**
Well, I've never lost at
rock-paper-scissors.
**[14:45] A**
This isn't right! Something's wrong!
**[14:47] A**
You cheated, didn't you?! Please,
one more! Just one more time!
**[14:49] K**
You mean it? This is the last time.
**[14:52] A**
You accepted! You accepted,
didn't you, Kazuma?!
**[14:55] A**
I don't know how you're cheating,
**[14:57] A**
but if you want to play that way,
I have a trick up my sleeve, too!
**[15:00] A**
Blessing!
**[15:02] K**
Hey, that's dirty! You buffed
your luck with magic!
**[15:05] A**
Hey, luck is a factor in skill!
**[15:07] A**
And magic skill is a factor in luck!
**[15:09] A**
Now, here we go! Rock-paper-scissors!
**[15:13] A**
Why?!
**[15:15] K**
Even when I was a kid, I never
lost at rock-paper-scissors.
**[15:18] A**
You coward! What is that?! No fair!
**[15:20] A**
It's cheating! Some kind of cheating ability!
**[15:23] A**
You were born with a special ability?!
**[15:26] A**
Then that cancels out the gracious
help I've been offering to you!
**[15:30] A**
Send me back! Send me back to the
heavenly realm, you dirty cheat!
**[15:34] K**
Hey, you little bitch!
**[15:36] K**
Are you saying my special ability is
being able to win at rock-paper-scissors?!
**[15:38] K**
Are you an idiot?! How is that
gonna help me fight monsters?!
**[15:42] A**
But, but...
**[15:43] K**
And the thing that pisses me off the most
**[15:45] K**
is the fact that you describe what
you've been doing as "gracious help"!
**[15:48] K**
Cut the crap! Gracious, my ass!
**[15:51] K**
If I could trade you in for a special power,
**[15:53] K**
I would've done it a long time ago!
**[15:59] A**
Kazuma, I can't believe you went there!
**[16:01] A**
Stop it! Quit pulling on my cheeks!
**[16:05] Driver**
The caravan to Arcanretia is pulling out.
**[17:15] K**
* I guess this is new, even for*
* the lady of a noble house.*
**[17:24] M**
Chomusuke is still cuter.
**[17:27] K**
* I never thought I'd be going on*
* a trip like this in this world.*
**[17:33] K**
*It's not bad.*
**[17:34] A**
Kazuma-san!
**[17:36] A**
My butt hurts like crazy!
**[17:39] A**
Can someone switch with me now?
**[17:45] K**
We'll move to a different
wagon when we get to a stop.
**[17:47] K**
Hang in there until then.
**[17:49] A**
Aww, man!
**[17:58] K**
Foresight.
**[18:02] K**
What is that?
**[18:04] K**
Excuse me.
**[18:04] Driver**
Yes?
**[18:05] K**
There's a dust cloud headed
in this direction...
**[18:09] K**
Do you know what it might be?
**[18:11] Driver**
Well, now... I can't see it,
**[18:14] Driver**
but around here, the only thing
that'd kick up a cloud of dust
**[18:17] Driver**
would have to be a pack of Lizard Runners.
**[18:20] Driver**
But they say the Princess Runner
was killed the other day,
**[18:24] Driver**
so it might just be a Sandwhale
kicking up some sand.
**[18:28] Driver**
The only other thing is...
maybe some Running Hawk Kites.
**[18:31] Driver**
Running Hawk Kites?
**[18:32] Driver**
I'm not being confusing on purpose, sir.
**[18:35] Driver**
These are some dangerous monsters.
**[18:37] Driver**
When the mating season starts,
to get the attention of females,
**[18:41] Driver**
the males compete in a mating
ritual like a chicken race.
**[18:44] (Megumin**
That settles it! You win!
**[18:44] Driver**
They charge straight at the
hardest thing they can find,
**[18:46] Driver**
and only turn away at the last second.
**[18:49] Driver**
Well, they'll probably just charge into
some nearby rock. Nothing to worry about.
**[18:53] K**
That's a relief, then!
**[19:01] K**
They do seem to be headed
this way at quite a clip...
**[19:05] Driver**
Oh, those are definitely
Running Hawk Kites.
**[19:08] Driver**
But it'd be strange for
them to head toward us.
**[19:11] Driver**
Maybe, somewhere in the caravan,
**[19:13] Driver**
there's a load of some incredibly
hard mineral, like adamantite!
**[19:19] Driver**
Huh? They do seem to be headed this way...
**[19:21] Driver**
Toward this wagon, actually...
**[19:24] K**
Hard as adamantite?
**[19:27] K**
Hey, Dark—
**[19:28] D**
Kazuma, Kazuma!
**[19:29] D**
A bunch of incredibly fast creatures
are headed right this way!
**[19:32] D**
And it feels like their gaze is fixed on me!
**[19:35] D**
They look so intense!
**[19:37] K**
It was you?!
**[19:38] Driver**
Sir, I need to stop the wagon!
**[19:41] Driver**
The adventurer guards will
protect you and the wagon!
**[19:45] K**
*I'm sorry our crusader is so hard.*
**[19:48] K**
Hey, Darkness! Those monsters are after you!
**[19:51] K**
They charge at the hardest
thing they can find!
**[19:53] K**
They're after your rock-hard muscles!
**[19:56] D**
Now, Kazuma. In spite of
it all, I'm still a woman.
**[19:59] D**
Don't call my muscles hard.
**[20:01] D**
I know what it is. My armor is
partially composed of adamantite.
**[20:06] D**
I'm sure that's what's attracting them.
**[20:09] D**
It's true! Don't give me that look!
**[20:12] D**
My body isn't that hard!
**[20:14] K**
Megumin, Aqua, we're up!
**[20:16] K**
We don't really need to fight this time,
**[20:18] K**
but it's kind of our fault
they're headed this way!
**[20:20] K**
We need to clean up our own mess!
**[20:23] Wiz**
I'll help, too!
**[20:25] K**
Stay in the wagon and
protect the driver, Wiz!
**[20:28] W**
Okay!
**[20:29] Driver**
Sir! Sir, you're paying for the trip!
**[20:32] Driver**
Wait somewhere safe!
**[20:33] K**
*I'm sorry. One of our party caused this.*
**[20:37] Driver**
Adventurers, if you please!
**[20:40] Adventurers**
Leave...
**[20:41] Adventurers**
...this...
**[20:41] Adventurers**
...to...
**[20:42] Adventurers**
...us!
**[20:48] K**
Megumin, get some explosion magic ready!
**[20:51] M**
Understood!
**[20:53] Adventurer**
You, crusader! You're not one
of the guards, so stay back!
**[20:57] Adventurer**
Hey, it looks like the monsters
**[20:59] Adventurer**
are headed straight for that crusader!
**[21:02] Adventurer**
That's Decoy!
**[21:04] Adventurer**
Crusaders have a skill called Decoy that lets
them attract the attention of monsters!
**[21:07] Adventurer**
She's not one of the guards,
but she's taking on all of the monsters!
**[21:12] K**
*I'm sorry. She's not using that skill.*
**[21:14] Adv**
She's facing all those monsters
without backing down at all!
**[21:17] Adv**
She's so brave!
**[21:19] K**
* I'm sorry. I don't think bravery*
* has anything to do with it.*
**[21:22] Adv**
She's not even being paid!
**[21:23] Adv**
Adventurer or not, we can't expose
one of the passengers to danger!
**[21:27] Adv**
I'll back her up! Bind!
**[21:29] D**
What?
**[21:37] Adv**
No way...
**[21:38] Adv**
Did she block the Bind because she knew
they'd turn on me if I had hit them?!
**[21:43] ---**
Gulp...
**[21:45] Adv**
I'm sorry! I was trying to help,
but I only got in the way!
**[21:49] Adv**
Forgive me! Forgive me!
**[21:53] K**
I'm so sorry!
**[21:55] K**
I'm so sorry about our party member!
**[21:56] ---**
It hurts...
**[21:56] K**
I am so, so sorry for the
trouble our pervert caused!
***SIGN*** To my dear friends Funifura-san and Dodonko-san. Thank you for your response. I'm doing well. Regarding the friends I mentioned in my letter, they really do exist. Honestly. So please stop saying it's impossible for someone who has social anxiety to make friends, and demanding the truth. You're hurting my feelings. Yunyun
***SIGN*** Episode 8
***SIGN*** Sightseeing in This Pitiful City!
**[23:31] Yunyun**
To my dear friends Funifura-san
and Dodonko-san.
**[23:34] Yunyun**
Thank you for your response. I'm doing well.
**[23:37] Yunyun**
Regarding the friends I mentioned
in my letter, they really do ex—
# E8 - Sightseeing in This Pitiful City!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6P8GGMW6/sightseeing-in-this-pitiful-city)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] K**
*A chicken race.*
**[00:03] K**
* A game of speed in which*
* competitors charge at an obstacle*
**[00:06] K**
*at full speed, dodging only at the last second,*
**[00:09] K**
*to demonstrate courage.*
**[00:12] K**
* And right now, she has been chosen as*
* the obstacle in this dangerous game.*
**[00:17] D**
Oh, boy! Here they come, here they come!
**[00:20] D**
K-Kazuma, this time...
this time I'm surely done for!
**[00:23] D**
Oh, they're gonna ram me!
**[00:35] D**
Kazuma! Do you suppose this
counts as a type of teasing?
**[00:38] D**
This sensation of almost being
struck is quite something!
**[00:41] D**
Unbelievable. Males in heat are
leaping over me, one after another!
**[00:47] K**
Stop it! There are people watching!
Don't say another word!
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! 2
***SIGN*** Episode 8 Sightseeing in This Pitiful City!
**[02:21] A**
Blessing!
**[02:25] D**
Oh, don't bother with me!
**[02:30] K**
We shouldn't need to worry
about Darkness now.
**[02:32] A**
All thanks to my Blessing!
**[02:34] K**
Yeah, yeah.
**[02:35] K**
When we're done here, you can have my seat.
**[02:37] A**
Yes!
**[02:39] Advs**
Lightning!
**[02:40] Advs**
Blade of Wind!
**[02:42] Advs**
Fireball!
**[02:57] K**
They're still coming?!
**[02:58] D**
All right!
**[03:02] K**
Pops, are there any cliffs around here?!
**[03:04] Driver**
Nothing of the sort!
**[03:06] Driver**
Closest thing is a cave we use
for shelter from the heat!
**[03:09] K**
A cave? That works! Take us there!
**[03:11] K**
Megumin, Aqua! Get in the wagon!
**[03:14] K**
Come on, Darkness—
**[03:16] K**
So heavy... Can't lift...
**[03:18] D**
Don't say I'm heavy!
**[03:21] D**
You have to specify that
my *armor* is too heavy!
**[03:24] D**
Just tie me to the wagon with
a rope and drag me along.
**[03:28] D**
It's an emergency! No way around it!
**[03:30] D**
Don't hold back! You have no choice!
**[03:33] Driver**
Sir, you'd better hurry!
**[03:35] Driver**
We can't wait much longer!
**[03:37] K**
Let me know if it's too much, Darkness!
**[03:39] K**
We'll let you loose!
**[03:41] D**
Being tied to a cart and dragged by horses...
**[03:44] D**
Not only that, but while in that state,
I'll be chased by a bunch of lus—
**[04:00] D**
Kazuma! This is good! So good!
**[04:01] D**
Don't yell my name in that context!
**[04:02] D**
It's a new discovery,
being treated as luggage like this!
**[04:05] A**
I knew you were a brute, Kazuma,
but this might be going too far...
**[04:11] K**
I-It wasn't my idea! It was Darkness!
**[04:14] Driver**
Sir, they're gonna catch us at this rate!
**[04:19] K**
Crap! Pops, how far to the cave?
**[04:21] Driver**
Need more time!
**[04:22] Both**
We're done for!
**[04:24] Wiz**
Bottomless Swamp!
**[04:32] K**
Thanks, Wiz!
**[04:37] D**
For a noble to be in such
a disheveled state...
**[04:41] D**
No! Stop it! Don't look, Kazuma!
**[04:43] D**
Don't look at the seedy sight
of me being treated so roughly!
**[04:48] A**
Heal! Heal! Heal! Heal! Heal!
**[04:51] A**
Darkness! Hang in there!
**[04:53] M**
Kazuma! The cave is within sight!
**[04:56] M**
I'm ready to fire my magic anytime!
**[04:58] K**
All right!
**[04:59] K**
Pops, stop the wagon to the
side of the cave's opening!
**[05:02] Driver**
Okay!
**[05:03] K**
Aqua, I need support magic
to boost my strength!
**[05:06] A**
Got it!
**[05:07] A**
Powered!
**[05:12] K**
Snipe! Snipe! Snipe! Snipe!
**[05:26] K**
*I see...*
**[05:28] K**
* And I was starting to*
* wonder just what made*
**[05:30] K**
* these Running Hawk Kites*
* "kites" of any kind.*
**[05:32] K**
*That clears it up.*
**[05:33] Driver**
Hang on tight, folks!
**[05:36] K**
Got it!
**[06:01] D**
Not bad! This treatment isn't bad at all!
**[06:03] D**
I should've expected as much from Kazuma!
Roughed up and then used as monster bait—
**[06:12] K**
Megumin!
**[06:13] M**
Explosion!
**[06:28] Chef**
Now, everyone, eat up!
**[06:30] Chef**
This turned out great, so help yourself!
**[06:32] Chef**
I have to say, that was impressive!
**[06:34] Chef**
To think you had a magic user powerful
enough to use explosion magic!
**[06:38] Chef**
And an arch priest able to treat all
the injured with no trouble!
**[06:43] Chef**
Facing down that pack of Running Hawk Kites
**[06:46] Chef**
without backing down, all on her own!
Such a courageous crusader!
**[06:49] Chef**
And being able to used advanced magic
to slow them down with that swamp magic!
**[06:52] Chef**
Not to mention the inspired decision to
lure the enemy into the cave so that
**[06:57] Chef**
they could be dealt with all at once!
**[06:59] Chef**
I am quite impressed!
**[07:01] K**
*Please stop, seriously.*
**[07:03] K**
*It's not like that at all. This is our fault.*
**[07:06] Chef**
This is just to show my
gratitude. Here, please.
**[07:09] K**
No, no, no, no! It's totally fine! Really!
**[07:12] Chef**
What are you saying?
**[07:14] Chef**
It was your group that defeated
the Running Hawk Kites!
**[07:17] K**
As adventurers, it's only natural
we contribute to the battle.
**[07:20] Chef**
Remarkable!
**[07:22] Chef**
To think that true adventurers like you
people still exist in this harsh world!
**[07:28] K**
* I can't accept a reward*
* for a problem we caused!*
**[07:31] K**
KONOSUBA!
**[07:33] Advs**
Can you pull it off?!
**[07:42] A**
Thank you, thank you!
**[07:59] K**
You guys are making this very awkward.
**[08:02] M**
Nah, I was just impressed
with how well you were doing.
**[08:05] D**
Something about seeing my
armor being repaired first-hand
**[08:09] D**
is exciting to watch.
**[08:11] K**
I'm glad the smithing skills I learned
for product development came in handy.
**[08:16] Crowd**
Again! Do that trick again!
**[08:18] Crowd**
I'll pay if I have to!
So please, one more time!
**[08:22] K**
She could probably make a living
doing this sort of thing.
**[08:42] K**
Hey, wake up, Megumin! Something's weird!
**[08:48] K**
Hey! Megumin, Wiz, wake up!
**[08:51] K**
Otherwise I'm gonna do something that'll
make it hard to look me in the eye...
**[08:54] K**
You don't mind? It's fine, then?
**[08:56] D**
Of course it's not!
**[08:57] D**
What were you going to do?
**[09:00] K**
Hey, don't scare me like that!
**[09:02] K**
I was about to do something
crazy in front of you!
**[09:05] D**
Seriously, what were you going to do?
**[09:08] D**
No, that's not important now.
**[09:10] Crowd**
Hey, there's something out there!
**[09:12] Crowd**
Everyone, wake up!
**[09:17] K**
And... Foresight.
**[09:23] K**
There's a lot of them!
But they're moving stiffly...
**[09:36] K**
Handle things here! I'll get Aqua!
**[09:39] K**
*Now's our chance to pay everyone back!*
**[09:41] K**
* After the trouble we caused when the Running*
* Hawk Kites were attracted to Darkness—*
**[09:47] A**
What is this?! Why am I surrounded
by undead the second I wake up?!
**[09:50] A**
Kazuma-san! Kazuma-san!
**[09:53] K**
Wait. Is this...
**[09:57] A**
Trying to attack us while we sleep?!
Pretty sneaky of you, undead!
**[10:00] A**
Oh, wandering souls, rest in peace!
**[10:03] A**
Turn Undead!
**[10:18] D**
Hang in there, Wiz!
**[10:19] D**
Someone! Wiz is...
**[10:20] Crowd**
Amazing! She got all those zombies at once!
**[10:23] Crowd**
Awesome!
**[10:24] K**
*I'm sorry.*
**[10:27] A**
Your luck ran out when you ran into me!
**[10:29] A**
Now, I'll purify every last one of you!
**[10:33] K**
*I'm sorry.*
**[10:34] Crowd**
Such a beautiful priest!
**[10:37] Crowd**
She's like a goddess!
**[10:39] Crowd**
She's from that crusader's party!
**[10:42] K**
*I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.*
**[10:44] K**
* I'm so sorry for everything*
* my friends keep causing.*
**[10:47] Crowd**
It's pretty rare to see a
pack of attacking zombies.
**[10:50] Crowd**
Good thing we had that priest with us!
**[10:54] K**
*I'm sorry.*
**[10:56] K**
*If our goddess wasn't here,*
**[10:57] K**
* these zombies probably wouldn't*
* have shown up in the first place.*
**[11:02] A**
Well, Kazuma? Was that goddess-like or what?
**[11:05] A**
I have to say, I have been
really nailing it lately!
**[11:08] A**
It wouldn't kill you to
make an offering, y'know!
**[11:12] Guy**
Wow, you've saved us again!
**[11:15] Guy**
This time, please, accept this reward!
**[11:18] K**
I'm sorry! We absolutely can not accept!
**[11:23] YY**
Can you wrap this up as a gift?
**[11:25] Butcher**
Sure thing.
**[11:27] YY**
E-Excuse me!
**[11:29] YY**
W-We're finally going to duel today, Megumin!
**[11:32] YY**
This is just a little something from me!
You can all enjoy it together!
**[11:37] YY**
H-Hello?
**[11:47] A**
Hey, look over there!
**[12:07] A**
We're here! The city of water
and hot springs, Arcanretia!
**[12:26] K**
Wow! Elves and dwarves!
**[12:29] K**
Now this is really fantastical!
**[12:32] D**
The scenery is completely
different from Axel...
**[12:37] D**
And the air is so clean.
**[12:39] Vendor**
Steamed buns! Care for a steamed bun?
**[12:42] M**
Those are a local specialty, Arcan steamed buns.
**[12:45] M**
They're supposed to be quite tasty!
**[12:47] K**
I'm impressed you know that, Megumin.
**[12:49] M**
Arcanretia is famous among
adventurers as a health resort.
**[12:53] M**
The curative effects of the hot springs
here are said to be extraordinary!
**[12:56] ---**
Yeah?
**[12:58] D**
My father took me to several
different towns in the past,
**[13:02] D**
but this place is more
beautiful than any of them.
**[13:05] D**
This should be a good hot springs trip.
**[13:08] K**
If they're all like this, maybe we should've
been visiting different towns all this time.
**[13:13] Driver**
Well, enjoy your holiday, folks!
**[13:16] K**
Thanks, Pops!
**[13:19] M**
Aww... Jarippa.
**[13:21] M**
Jarippa is being taken away!
**[13:24] K**
She gave something a
weird name again...
**[13:28] A**
Come on, everyone! Where should we go?
**[13:30] A**
You can ask me anything you
need to know about this town!
**[13:32] A**
After all, this town is the home of
the Axis Church, which I've blessed!
**[13:38] K**
* As in... the Axis cult*
* that's full of weirdos?*
**[13:41] K**
*And this is town is its home?*
**[13:44] K**
*That explains why Aqua wanted to come here.*
**[13:49] Crowd**
Welcome to Arcanretia!
**[13:51] Crowd**
Are you tourists? Converts?
Adventurers? Pilgrims?
**[13:55] Crowd**
If you've come looking for work,
might I recommend the Axis Church?
**[13:58] Crowd**
We have a job right now where you can
get paid just to tell other towns
**[14:01] Crowd**
about how wonderful the Axis Church is!
**[14:03] Crowd**
If you accept the position,
**[14:04] Crowd**
you get the bonus of being able to identify
yourself as part of the Axis Church!
**[14:07] Crowd**
How about it? Please, join us!
**[14:10] Crowd**
Such beautiful light blue hair!
**[14:13] Crowd**
Is it natural? I'm jealous!
I'm ever so jealous!
**[14:16] Crowd**
Your raiment is just like
Aqua-sama's, too! It suits you!
**[14:20] K**
W-We should probably
head to an inn for now.
**[14:22] D**
R-Right. Good idea.
**[14:25] K**
We've already got a priest from
the Axis cult with us, so...
**[14:28] K**
Pardon us!
**[14:30] Crowd**
Farewell, comrades! And may
you have a blessed day!
**[14:34] Crowd**
KONOSUBA!
**[14:44] V**
Hey!
**[14:46] V**
Hey!
**[14:55] V**
Come on! Come over here!
**[15:01] W**
Where am I?
**[15:03] K**
Relax. We're already at Arcanretia.
**[15:07] W**
I feel as though I was on the
edge of a beautiful river,
**[15:09] W**
and Verdia-san was happily waving
to me from the other side...
**[15:15] W**
Thank you so much, Kazuma-san.
**[15:17] K**
You should thank Darkness, not me.
**[15:19] D**
I'm glad you've made it back.
**[15:22] K**
I hope that Aqua hasn't
caused some new problem.
**[15:27] (Flashback) A**
I'm gonna go have some fun at the
headquarters of the Axis Church!
**[15:31] (Flashback) A**
Time to be fawned over for
being an arch priest!
**[15:35] K**
I'm worried.
**[15:37] D**
I'm sure it'll be fine.
Megumin went with her.
**[15:41] K**
Really? You think so?
**[15:44] W**
I'm fine now,
**[15:46] W**
so why don't the two of you
take a look around town?
**[15:48] D**
Let's go, Kazuma. I'd love
to get a look at the city.
**[15:55] D**
Look, Kazuma! There's a fountain!
**[15:58] K**
Hey, you're right.
**[16:00] D**
This statue of their goddess is beautiful...
**[16:03] K**
*And a sham.*
**[16:10] Girl**
My apples...
**[16:11] K**
Are you okay?
**[16:16] Girl**
Thank you so much!
**[16:17] Girl**
You've been a huge help!
**[16:20] Girl**
Um...
**[16:22] Girl**
Can I do anything to thank you?
**[16:26] K**
*Huh? Did I just trigger a flag?*
**[16:33] Girl**
There's a café run by the
Axis Church just up ahead!
**[16:36] Girl**
Why don't we go there and have a chat?
**[16:38] K**
I'm good, thanks.
**[16:40] Girl**
W-W-Wait a second!
**[16:42] Girl**
I'm actually great at telling fortunes!
**[16:44] Girl**
Why don't you let me read your future?
**[16:46] K**
Th-That's quite all right!
**[16:48] K**
Seriously, it's fine!
**[16:50] K**
L-Let go!
**[16:53] K**
Ow, ow, ow!
**[16:54] Girl**
I've seen your future!
**[16:56] Girl**
Grave misfortune awaits you!
**[16:58] Girl**
But if you convert to the Axis faith,
your misfortune can be avoided!
**[17:01] Girl**
Join us! Why don't you join us?
**[17:05] K**
I'm experiencing misfortune
at this very instant!
**[17:07] K**
Hey, let go!
**[17:08] K**
Darkness, save me!
**[17:10] D**
I'm sorry.
**[17:12] D**
I'm actually a believer in the Eris faith.
**[17:14] D**
If you want to proselytize to him,
you'll have to wait until—
**[17:27] K**
W-Well, you know how it is.
**[17:30] K**
I know that the Axis cult and the
Eris church don't get along too well...
**[17:33] K**
Maybe you should keep your charm hidden.
**[17:35] K**
And don't let it bother you too—
**[17:38] K**
Are you turned on right now?
**[17:41] D**
I am not.
**[17:42] K**
But you just made that "Mmn!" sound.
**[17:46] D**
This place really is the
home of the Axis cult.
**[17:50] K**
Well, there are fewer people around here,
**[17:52] K**
so we should be fine now.
**[17:54] Woman**
Eek! Help me!
**[17:56] Woman**
You there! Please, help me!
**[17:58] Woman**
This violent-looking man,
who's probably an Eris cultist,
**[18:01] Woman**
is trying to force me into his dark ways!
**[18:05] Guy**
Hey, you there!
**[18:06] Guy**
You're not with the Axis Church, are you?
**[18:09] Guy**
If you were as cool and strong as the members
of that faith, I'd have to run away!
**[18:13] Guy**
But if you're not, I'm not gonna hold back!
**[18:15] Guy**
I've received the blessing
of the Dark Goddess Eris!
**[18:17] Guy**
If you wanna get in my way,
then I'll let you have it!
**[18:20] Woman**
Oh, this is horrible!
**[18:22] Woman**
And all I have on me is the paperwork
for joining the Axis Church!
**[18:26] Woman**
If only someone would sign their name,
**[18:28] Woman**
this sinister Eris cultist
would flee in fear!
**[18:33] Woman**
Hey, wait, don't abandon me, sir!
**[18:35] Woman**
It's fine! You just have to
write your name on this paper,
**[18:38] Woman**
and then you'll receive some
kind power from Aqua-sama
**[18:40] Woman**
to make you strong and super cool!
**[18:41] Woman**
With that power, this Eris cultist will
surely lose his nerve and run away!
**[18:46] Guy**
That's right!
**[18:47] Guy**
Plus, if you join, you'll get
all kinds of rare bonuses,
**[18:49] Guy**
like becoming a good entertainer
**[18:52] Guy**
and being beloved by undead monsters!
**[18:54] D**
If you insist on calling Eris-sama
a dark goddess in my presence—
**[19:02] K**
Is everyone in the Axis cult like this?
**[19:07] K**
* Everyone in the Eris cult better*
* not be like her, either.*
**[19:10] K**
You were turned on, weren't you?
**[19:12] D**
Was not.
**[19:12] Dude**
Congratulations!
**[19:14] Dude**
You are the millionth to
pass down this street!
**[19:18] Dude**
I'd love to give you a commemorative
prize, but you see,
**[19:21] Dude**
the prize is actually sponsored
by the Axis Church,
**[19:23] Dude**
so if you'd just help me get
this paperwork out of the way,
**[19:27] Dude**
we can get your name, and you
can receive your prize...
**[19:31] Woman**
Hey! Hey, wow, it's been so long!
**[19:34] Woman**
It's me! You know, me! How've you been?
**[19:36] Woman**
Remember? We were classmates in school!
**[19:39] Woman**
We were in the same class!
Do you remember me?
**[19:41] Woman**
I've changed a lot since
joining the Axis Church,
**[19:45] Woman**
so maybe you didn't recognize me!
**[19:47] Woman**
Oh, my! Wait a moment!
**[19:48] Woman**
Are you two newlyweds? Why, how darling!
**[19:51] Woman**
Here, take this detergent!
**[19:53] Woman**
Oh, don't worry about paying!
**[19:55] Woman**
It's a little wedding gift from an old lady!
**[19:58] Woman**
It's actually some amazing stuff!
**[20:00] Woman**
I mean, it's received Aqua-sama's blessing,
so it can get rid of any kind of stain!
**[20:03] Woman**
And it's so easy on your skin! I'm serious!
**[20:07] Woman**
You can even drink it!
**[20:14] K**
What is wrong with this town?
**[20:17] D**
A trial in a heretical land...
**[20:20] D**
What an experience!
**[20:22] K**
You never break character, do you?
**[20:25] Waitress**
Here are your orders.
**[20:28] Waitress**
Oh, and for our guest from the Eris cult...
**[20:31] Waitress**
This is for you, on the house.
**[20:34] Waitress**
Please enjoy yourselves.
**[20:39] D**
Hey, Kazuma, why don't
we all move to this town?
**[20:43] K**
Absolutely not!
**[20:44] K**
KONOSUBA!
**[20:49] K**
Let's just head back to the inn.
**[20:58] K**
Are you okay?
**[21:00] D**
Here, let me see.
**[21:02] K**
Looks like it's just a scratch.
**[21:04] Girl**
Thank you, mister, lady!
**[21:07] K**
*Even in a city full of religious nutcases,*
**[21:10] K**
*this girl blooms like a single flower!*
**[21:13] K**
Here.
**[21:15] K**
Well? Does it hurt?
**[21:16] Girl**
No, it's fine now! Thank you!
**[21:19] Girl**
Hey, nice man, tell me your name!
**[21:23] K**
It's Kazuma. Satou Kazuma.
**[21:25] K**
And the scary lady here is Darkness.
**[21:27] D**
D-Don't give me such a weird introduction!
**[21:30] D**
Am I really that scary-looking?
**[21:34] Girl**
How do you write "Satou Kazuma"?
**[21:37] Girl**
Write it for me, mister!
**[21:39] K**
Sure. My name is written like—
**[21:51] K**
Damn it all!
**[21:54] Girl**
Mister!
***SIGN*** Episode 9
***SIGN*** A Goddess for This Corrupt Hot Springs Town!
***SIGN*** My dear friends, Funifura-san and Dodonko-san. About coming to visit, please don't do it! I'm sure you're busy, so don't put yourselves out on my behalf. I'm actually pretty occupied myself, as well. Is it all right if you wait a bit before coming by? Please. Please, I beg for your patience. -Yunyun
**[23:32] YY**
My dear friends, Funifura-san
and Dodonko-san.
**[23:35] YY**
About coming to visit, please don't do it!
**[23:38] YY**
I'm sure you're busy, so don't—
# E9 - A Goddess for This Corrupt Hot Springs Town!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GRVN4PQZY/a-goddess-for-this-corrupt-hot-springs-town)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] K**
Damn it!
**[00:05] K**
I wanna talk to whoever's in charge!
**[00:06] K**
I'll give them a piece of my mind!
**[00:07] Priest**
Oh, my! Whatever is the matter?
**[00:10] Priest**
Are you here for conversion? Baptism?
**[00:12] Priest**
Or... are you here for me?
**[00:15] K**
F-For you?
**[00:18] Priest**
I'm just joking!
**[00:20] Priest**
Come now, don't take me seriously!
**[00:22] Priest**
Are you all right in the head?
**[00:23] K**
*What do I do now?
I want to hit her with a fist!*
**[00:25] PRiest**
Our high priest, Zesta-sama, is out
screwing around while proselytizing...
**[00:29] (K**
That is, he's out spreading the
glories of Aqua-sama's name.
**[00:29] (K**
Wait, what did you just say?
**[00:32] (K**
I'm sorry, but you'll have
to come back another time.
**[00:34] K**
Hang on, did a magic user and
an arch priest come by here?
**[00:38] Priest**
Oh, if you're looking for them...
**[00:45] Priest**
By the way, the woman you came here with
**[00:47] Priest**
is being stoned by children...
**[00:50] K**
Hey! What're you doing?!
**[00:53] D**
Kazuma...
**[00:55] D**
Even the women and children in
this town are pretty advanced.
**[00:58] K**
Just put away your Eris sect charm already!
Are you doing this on purpose?
**[01:02] D**
I refuse!
**[01:03] D**
I refuse!
**[01:05] K**
Aqua! Hey, Aqua!
**[01:17] A**
Welcome, my lost lamb.
**[01:20] A**
Now, tell me of your sins.
**[01:23] A**
God will hear them, and will
surely grant forgiveness.
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! 2
***SIGN*** Episode 9 A Goddess for This Corrupt Hot Springs Town!
**[02:59] K**
Listen, it's me! Y'know, me?
**[03:01] K**
Me!
**[03:02] K**
What's with this town? Do something
about your followers already.
**[03:07] A**
I see. You've performed
the "It's me" scam, then.
**[03:10] A**
You must think deeply upon your sins.
**[03:13] A**
If you do, surely the merciful goddess,
Aqua-sama, will forgive you.
**[03:18] K**
Why are you trying to stonewall me?!
**[03:20] K**
I know what this is.
You're enjoying this, aren't you?
**[03:22] K**
You're tickled that you get to do
something priestly for once, aren't you?
**[03:26] A**
Do you have anything else to confess?
**[03:28] A**
If not, then leave here, and live
a forthright life once again.
**[03:32] K**
Damn it, listen!
**[03:33] K**
Aren't you an arch priest,
which are revered around here?
**[03:37] K**
If you'd say something to your followers,
it'd take care of all of this!
**[03:40] K**
Control your people a little!
**[03:44] A**
Nothing else, then?
**[03:46] A**
Well, I must wait for the next lost lamb.
**[03:49] (K**
Hey!
**[03:50] (K**
Now, go forth.
**[03:51] K**
What're you saying?!
I said get out of there, damn it!
**[03:54] A**
You get out! You're done
confessing, so get out!
**[03:58] K**
*That little...*
**[04:05] K**
There is actually something
I'd like to get off my chest.
**[04:09] A**
Well, please, share it with me!
**[04:11] A**
Confess now, and admit your sins.
**[04:14] A**
Do you have an unhealthy interest
in a crusader's laundry?
**[04:18] A**
A desire to stick a magic user's
black hair up your nose?
**[04:22] A**
Inappropriate carnal feelings for
a beautiful and noble priest?
**[04:28] K**
There's a special cup that a priest
friend of mine uses for party tricks...
**[04:32] K**
I accidentally broke it.
**[04:35] K**
Also, she was bragging about how she
had bought some rare, fancy liquor.
**[04:40] K**
So I figured, "How good can it be?"
and poured a little bit for myself...
**[04:44] K**
But it was better than I
expected, so I drank it all,
**[04:47] K**
then replaced it with some cheap hooch since
I figured she couldn't tell the difference.
**[04:50] A**
What are you saying?
What exactly are you saying, Kazuma?
**[04:52] K**
And since the priest in question
is constantly causing problems,
**[04:56] K**
I posted an opening for an Eris sect priest
**[04:59] K**
on the adventurer guild's help wanted board—
**[05:03] A**
You apostate!
**[05:06] K**
Sheesh, I said I was joking.
**[05:09] A**
And you're not really
looking for another priest?
**[05:13] K**
Putting aside the first two,
that last one wasn't true at all.
**[05:16] A**
Wait, what was that about the other two?
**[05:21] M**
Can we... Can we go home, like, soon?
**[05:26] Confessor**
Please... Please, hear me out.
**[05:30] Confessor**
I have been a member of the Axis faith
**[05:31] Confessor**
and worshiped Aqua-sama for a long time...
**[05:33] Confessor**
But!
**[05:35] Confessor**
The bountiful chest on the
portrait of the goddess Eris...
**[05:37] Confessor**
It leads me astray!
**[05:40] Confessor**
That chest is the chest of a devil!
**[05:43] Confessor**
Please forgive my sinful ways in
being tempted by another goddess.
**[05:50] A**
Rest easy.
**[05:52] A**
God forgives all.
**[05:54] A**
Thou shalt love big breasts.
**[05:57] A**
Thou shalt love small breasts.
**[06:00] A**
The Axis faith teaches
forgiveness in all things.
**[06:03] A**
Whether you're a lolicon, a NEET,
**[06:06] A**
or a questionably-human
fan of animal-eared girls...
**[06:09] A**
As long as you're not interested
in undead or devil girls,
**[06:11] A**
you have love in your heart,
and you don't break the law,
**[06:13] A**
all will be forgiven.
**[06:19] A**
Faithful follower,
**[06:22] A**
I will share holy words that will
help you avoid demonic temptation.
**[06:26] A**
"Eris pads her chest."
**[06:29] A**
The next time you feel you are being
led astray, chant these words.
**[06:32] A**
If you know anyone else being tempted,
you can share it with them.
**[06:37] Dude**
Eris pads her chest...
**[06:40] Dude**
I... I feel as though my eyes have been opened!
**[06:43] A**
Let's say it once more, together.
**[06:45] Both**
Eris pads her chest!
**[06:48] Dude**
Thank you for the wonderful incantation!
**[06:51] K**
Is it okay for a goddess to get along by
selling out one of her younger co-workers?
**[06:55] A**
Hey, the number and intensity of
followers is really important for gods!
**[06:59] A**
They directly influence our power.
**[07:02] A**
I may not have many followers,
**[07:05] A**
but their faith is really strong!
**[07:08] A**
I'd do anything for my adoring faithful!
**[07:13] A**
KONOSUBA!
**[07:15] K**
We're back.
**[07:17] W**
Welcome back!
**[07:19] K**
Are you feeling better?
**[07:20] W**
After taking a bath, I felt back to normal.
**[07:23] D**
That's good to hear.
**[07:25] W**
With no one else here, it was like
I had the mixed bath all to myself!
**[07:30] K**
*Does that mean...*
**[07:32] W**
So, everyone, how did the sightseeing go?
**[07:35] M**
The Axis cult... scares me.
**[07:38] D**
I-I'm thinking about going
sightseeing tomorrow, too.
**[07:42] K**
Y-You...
**[07:44] K**
Well, whatever. Do what you want.
**[07:46] K**
I'm gonna head into the bath.
**[07:51] K**
I'm heading into the bath.
**[07:52] M**
We heard you.
**[07:54] W**
Enjoy yourself.
**[07:57] K**
I'm—
**[07:58] Duo**
Get going already!
**[08:06] W**
What a lovely bath.
**[08:08] H**
Must be nice to be you this morning.
**[08:11] W**
I only came for the baths.
**[08:15] W**
You seem pretty worn out, though.
**[08:18] H**
This place is a demon city...
**[08:21] W**
You've got your hands full, huh?
**[08:24] W**
By the way...
**[08:34] W**
He's been looking right
at me this whole time...
**[08:37] W**
Excuse me, but being stared at like
this is kind of embarrassing—
**[08:42] K**
Don't mind me.
**[08:44] W**
R-Right... It's a mixed bath, after all.
**[08:47] K**
Don't mind me.
**[08:56] K**
What a bashful lady!
**[09:05] H**
Damn it, I try to be nice,
**[09:09] H**
and it's conversion this, proselytize that,
**[09:11] H**
and they just don't freaking shut up
about it for a single second, damn it!
**[09:18] K**
Guess the town's getting to him, too.
**[09:26] H**
This town...
**[09:30] K**
Better not get mixed up with him.
**[09:35] Worker**
How's that, sir?
**[09:36] K**
Oh, that's the spot!
**[09:40] Worker**
This soap is nice and sudsy, right?
**[09:42] K**
Huh, I guess.
**[09:45] Worker**
It can cure any kind of abnormal
status, and not only that...
**[09:49] Worker**
It's actually edible! It only uses
natural ingredients, so it's sacred!
**[09:52] Worker**
You get some if you join the faith!
**[09:54] Worker**
And it's free!
**[09:55] K**
No, thanks!
**[09:56] Worker**
If you join now you, can get
double points! It's all free!
**[09:59] H**
Don't try to trick me by dressing it up
with talk of appealing stuff like points!
**[10:02] H**
KONOSUBA!
**[10:07] K**
I wanna go home. I wanna go home already.
**[10:08] M**
Hup!
**[10:10] D**
Hey, Megumin! It's rude to swim in the bath!
**[10:13] M**
Come on, don't worry about that.
**[10:15] D**
H-Hey! What are you doing?!
**[10:17] M**
Why are you acting so embarrassed?
**[10:19] M**
We're in a rough line of work.
We can't afford to be so dainty!
**[10:23] D**
Your logic doesn't make sense!
**[10:24] D**
Oh, my towel!
**[10:31] M**
I was originally just going to drag
that pair of lazybones outside,
**[10:34] M**
then hunt the crowds of undead that
Aqua attracts with Kazuma, but...
**[10:39] D**
That's what you were after?
**[10:42] D**
In any case, what kind of man is he?
**[10:45] D**
He seems conservative
and cowardly at times,
**[10:47] D**
but he never lets social standing bother him,
**[10:49] D**
and will get aggressive against nobles...
**[10:52] D**
You could say he's odd,
or maybe just strange—
**[10:54] D**
Shh!
**[10:56] M**
Next to us is the mixed bath.
**[10:58] M**
If he had to choose either the
men's bath or the mixed one,
**[11:01] M**
which do you think he'd choose?
**[11:02] D**
He might be timid and tend to
blanch at the crucial moment,
**[11:06] D**
but with the right justification, he wouldn't
hesitate to enter the mixed bath.
**[11:13] M**
Kazuma, you're there, aren't you?
**[11:16] M**
You're breathing hard with
your ear against the wall,
**[11:19] M**
imagining where Darkness
is going to wash first, right?
**[11:22] D**
M-Megumin, why make me the example?!
**[11:25] D**
Hey, Kazuma! Are you there?
You are, aren't you?!
**[11:30] D**
I guess he's not there.
**[11:32] M**
Maybe I shouldn't have suspected him...
**[11:36] M**
I'll just surreptitiously treat
him to a drink later.
**[11:39] D**
I suppose it actually was rude.
**[11:42] M**
He has his faults, but he's
pretty reliable in the end.
**[11:46] D**
He might not seem like it,
**[11:48] D**
but he always helps his
friends when they need it.
**[11:52] D**
He's not earnest about anything,
but at his core, he's a good person.
**[11:56] K**
* I'm starting to feel embarrassed*
* about eavesdropping...*
**[11:59] D**
By the way, Megumin, I was
curious about how your butt—
**[12:03] M**
Hold it right there!
**[12:04] M**
You may be my friend, Darkness,
but one more word, and you will pay!
**[12:08] D**
S-Stop it!
**[12:10] M**
Honestly, what is it with
these indecent breasts?!
**[12:17] D**
S-Stop!
**[12:20] M**
Now!
**[12:25] M**
See, I knew it!
**[12:27] M**
He was there the whole time, after all!
**[12:29] D**
It makes sense.
**[12:30] D**
I feel Kazuma's lusty gaze on me every day.
**[12:32] D**
There's no way someone as oversexed
as him wouldn't be in the mixed bath!
**[12:37] K**
Create Water!
**[12:40] M+D**
That's cold!
**[12:44] K**
Hey, don't throw the cat!
**[12:46] M**
Wash her in exchange for your eavesdropping!
**[12:50] K**
Must suck for you, having
such a weird owner, huh?
**[13:01] K**
KONOSUBA.
**[13:03] A**
This is too much!
**[13:06] A**
I just went into the baths!
**[13:10] W**
Y-Your tears really sting when
they hit me, Aqua-sama...
**[13:15] K**
So how many people did you
make trouble for today?
**[13:18] A**
What do you mean, trouble?!
**[13:20] A**
Why do you assume I did something wrong?!
**[13:23] W**
It seems, when Aqua-sama went into
the secret baths at the main church,
**[13:26] W**
the hot springs changed
into regular hot water...
**[13:29] A**
And they kicked me out!
**[13:31] A**
Why am I getting kicked out by
the church that worships me?!
**[13:35] A**
Tell me why!
**[13:38] K**
* Come to think of it, she purified*
* the tea into water, too...*
**[13:41] A**
But the part that made me maddest
was when I met the guy in charge...
**[13:45] (Flashback) A**
I apologize for purifying the
hot springs into hot water,
**[13:48] (Flashback) A**
but I couldn't help it.
**[13:50] (Flashback) A**
After all, it's because I am the
goddess of water, Aqua, in the flesh!
**[14:01] A**
I'm a goddess! I'm a goddess, and he did that!
**[14:11] A**
This town's danger is in peril!
**[14:14] K**
What exactly does "danger in peril" mean?
**[14:16] K**
You were crying all night, and now...
**[14:18] A**
The guy managing the springs told me this...
**[14:21] (Flashback) Dude**
The quality of the hot springs
has been dropping a bit lately.
**[14:26] A**
This is probably the Devil
King's army realizing
**[14:28] A**
they'd never win a direct
confrontation with my followers,
**[14:31] A**
so instead, they attack our source
of income, the hot springs!
**[14:34] K**
Really? Wow, that's something.
**[14:35] A**
Believe me!
**[14:37] M**
I admit it's true that most people are
disgusted by and dislike the Axis cult,
**[14:41] M**
but why bother with such
an elaborate conspiracy?
**[14:45] A**
I'm going to stand up for this town!
**[14:48] A**
So, you'll all help me, right?
**[14:52] K**
I'm busy with walking around
town and other stuff.
**[14:55] M**
I already know how terrifying
the Axis cult is,
**[14:59] M**
so I'd rather not get involved.
**[15:02] A**
Why?!
**[15:04] A**
Who cares about your dumb walk?!
**[15:06] A**
And you don't have to hate my
followers so much, Megumin!
**[15:09] A**
Wh-What about you, Darkness?
**[15:11] D**
W-Well, I'm... you know...
**[15:14] A**
Please!
**[15:16] D**
Fine! Fine, I'll help! I'll help you,
so stop purifying my grape juice!
**[15:20] K**
Wiz is soft on you, so maybe she'll help?
**[15:24] A**
I was crying to her all night, and in the
morning, she was fading away again...
**[15:28] A**
So I let her get some rest.
**[15:30] V**
*Come on... Come to me!*
**[15:33] K**
Why don't you save Wiz before the town?!
**[15:35] V**
Come on, come to me!
**[15:44] K**
Sitting here like this,
the town seems pretty nice.
**[15:47] M**
You're right.
**[15:49] M**
The scenery is nice, and the food is good...
**[15:52] M**
The only problem is the people.
**[15:54] Granny**
My, what nice weather!
**[15:56] Granny**
Is this a blessing from Aqua-sama?
**[15:58] Both**
*Here comes one!*
**[15:59] Granny**
And here's the thing about this pot...
**[16:02] Granny**
Nothing burns in it!
**[16:03] Granny**
Join the faith now and
you are guaranteed one!
**[16:06] Granny**
So, how about it?
**[16:08] Granny**
No need to to be shy!
**[16:10] Guy**
Hmm?
**[16:11] Girl**
Wow, out for a stroll?
**[16:13] Girl**
For you, big brother!
**[16:14] Dude**
For you, little sister!
**[16:16] Girl**
Join now and you get another, free!
**[16:18] Dude**
Hey, why won't you look me in the
eye when I'm talking to you?!
**[16:22] Dude**
I'm doing this for your sake!
It's for your own good!
**[16:28] M**
Do you think you could swallow a bar of soap?
**[16:34] H**
I don't have that much...
**[16:35] H**
I don't have that much to wash, all right?!
**[16:38] H**
Soap, detergent, soap,
detergent, soap, detergent...
**[16:41] M**
Swallow.
**[16:42] H**
Soap, detergent, soap,
detergent, soap, detergent—
**[16:44] M**
Swallow.
**[16:45] H**
Soap, detergent, soap,
detergent, soap, detergent,
**[16:47] (M**
Swallow.
**[16:48] H**
soap, detergent, soap,
detergent, soap, detergent,
**[16:50] H**
soap, detergent, soap,
detergent, soap, detergent!
**[16:53] (M**
I can't swallow this!
**[16:55] (M**
It'd make me too clean...
**[17:02] W**
Kazuma-san!
**[17:07] K**
Wiz? You feeling better?
**[17:09] W**
Yes, thank you.
**[17:11] W**
For a moment, I saw my party members
from when I was an adventurer
**[17:15] W**
trying to wave me away from
the other side of a river,
**[17:19] W**
but I managed to recover!
**[17:21] K**
*Doesn't that mean...*
**[17:23] W**
What were you doing out here?
**[17:25] K**
Well, actually—
**[17:27] K**
Huh? Wasn't he just...
**[17:30] M**
There was detergent...
uh, a man there a moment ago.
**[17:33] W**
Oh, my.
**[17:34] A**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[17:37] M**
That voice...
**[17:39] K**
I've got a bad feeling about this.
**[17:40] A**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[17:44] A**
My Axis Church faithful!
**[17:46] A**
The Devil King's army is currently
plotting sabotage against this town!
**[17:51] D**
...town.
**[17:52] A**
As for what exactly they're doing,
they've put poison in the town's hot springs!
**[17:57] A**
Their villainous deeds have already been
confirmed at a number of hot springs!
**[18:03] D**
...of hot springs.
**[18:04] Girl**
I just was in the hot springs,
and nothing was wrong.
**[18:08] A**
That's because I've been making rounds to
the hot springs and purifying them all!
**[18:13] K**
So she spent her morning doing
a hot springs tour, huh?
**[18:16] A**
But we can't rest easy yet!
**[18:18] A**
Which is why I'd like to ask for your help!
**[18:21] A**
Until this case is solved,
please don't use the hot springs!
**[18:25] Dude**
But this is a hot springs city, priest lady!
**[18:28] Dude**
If you tell people not to go into our
number one attraction, the hot springs,
**[18:32] Dude**
things are gonna dry up around here!
**[18:34] Lady**
Why would the Devil King's
army do that, anyway?
**[18:36] A**
Because they intend to cut off the
Axis Church's source of income!
**[18:40] A**
Yes, the Devil King's army fears
those of the Axis faith!
**[18:44] A**
It's definitely not because I'm
trying to stop the rest of you
**[18:48] A**
because it's unfair that only
I don't get to use the baths!
**[18:51] A**
Now, Axis faithful—
**[18:53] Dudes**
There she is!
**[18:55] Dudes**
That's the pain-in-the-butt woman who's been
turning all the hot springs into hot water!
**[19:00] A**
Wait—
**[19:01] Dudes**
Catch her, everyone!
**[19:02] Dudes**
Tie her up! Let's tie her up!
**[19:04] Crowd**
I thought it sounded fishy!
**[19:06] Crowd**
You were trying to trick us, eh?!
**[19:08] Crowd**
Is this some new kind of scam?
**[19:09] Crowd**
What are you really after?!
**[19:10] Crowd**
We work so hard to try and
make the world a better place!
**[19:13] K**
This is a wild change of events.
**[19:15] A**
I-It's not like that!
**[19:16] A**
There's a good reason for all this!
**[19:18] W**
I think Aqua-sama is about to start crying!
**[19:21] A**
Everyone, calm down! Just listen to me!
**[19:24] A**
Hey, Darkness, don't just
sit there! Say something!
**[19:27] A**
Just like we rehearsed!
**[19:29] A**
You're supposed to beg the
Axis Church for its help!
**[19:32] A**
Say it! Quit being shy, and just do it!
**[19:36] D**
P-Please help, Axis Church...
**[19:39] Dude**
We can't hear you, blonde lady!
**[19:42] K**
Poor thing.
**[19:43] A**
Oh, fine! Then I'll reveal my identity!
**[19:47] A**
Honored followers of the Axis faith,
**[19:50] A**
my name is Aqua.
**[19:53] A**
Yes, I am the one you worship,
**[19:56] A**
Aqua, the goddess of water!
**[19:59] A**
I have come here personally to help you all!
**[20:09] Dudes**
Quit screwing around!
**[20:11] Dudes**
If you think you can pretend to be Aqua-sama
**[20:14] Dudes**
because you have blue hair
and eyes, you'll be cursed!
**[20:16] Dudes**
We still oughta tie her up!
Tie her up and toss her in the lake!
**[20:19] Dudes**
If she's really the goddess of water,
Aqua-sama, she'd be fine in a lake!
**[20:23] Dudes**
Liar!
**[20:26] Dudes**
I bet you're actually a servant
of the Devil King's army
**[20:29] Dudes**
here to bankrupt our hot
spring city, aren't you?!
**[20:34] A**
It's true! I'm actually a goddess!
**[20:40] A**
But I'm the goddess of this town...
**[20:43] A**
They're so mean!
**[20:46] A**
Why did I get stoned by my own followers?!
**[20:50] W**
Aqua-sama, p-please drink this and calm down.
**[20:54] W**
Otherwise, your agitated holy aura
is going to hit me, and I'll...
**[21:01] A**
I want booze.
**[21:03] K**
You're not really that upset, are you?
**[21:04] M**
I understand you're desperate,
**[21:07] M**
but calling yourself a god is a bit much.
**[21:10] A**
But if they go into polluted
water, they'll get sick...
**[21:15] K**
Why are you trying to help them
after what they put you through?
**[21:20] A**
But if I don't do anything,
my dear followers will...
**[21:26] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[21:30] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[21:33] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[21:37] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[21:41] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[21:44] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[21:45] K**
What is this?!
**[21:46] A**
What's going on?
**[21:47] A**
Have my adoring faithful decided
to believe me and drop by?
**[21:48] ---**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[21:51] Crowd**
There she is!
**[21:52] Crowd**
The witch who claims the name of a goddess!
**[21:56] Crowd**
Time for a witch hunt!
***SIGN*** Episode 10
***SIGN*** God's Blessing on This Wonderful Party!
***SIGN*** My dear friends Funifura-san and Dodonko-san. Please don't come to visit! I know you said you're two days away from Axel, but please turn back right away! I assure you, I am not just pretending. Right now, the town is suffering from unprecedented storms and earthquakes as the Devil King's generals are waging a siege; things are very dangerous. And is there something you enjoy about cornering someone?! Well?! Is there?! -Yunyun
**[23:31] YY**
My dear friends Funifura-san and Dodonko-san.
**[23:34] YY**
Please don't come to visit!
**[23:36] YY**
I know you said you're
two days away from Axel,
**[23:38] YY**
but please head back—
# E10 - God's Blessing on This Wonderful Party!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GYGG8747Y/gods-blessing-on-this-wonderful-party)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[00:03] Crowd**
That witch who claims the name of a goddess!
**[00:05] Crowd**
Tie her up! Take the wench and tie her up!
**[00:07] Crowd**
Who gave you permission
to dye your hair blue?!
**[00:10] Crowd**
Impostor! Impostor! Impostor!
**[00:14] Crowd**
The Aqua impostor's running away!
**[00:18] Crowd**
Find the Aqua impostor!
***SIGN*** Episode 10 God's Blessing on This Wonderful Party!
**[00:20] Aqua**
I think the water source is the problem.
**[00:23] Megumin**
That makes sense.
**[00:24] Aqua**
If I can purify that, the hot springs
should all turn back to normal.
**[00:28] Aqua**
It'll cut off the rotten smell at the source!
**[00:30] Crowd**
There she is! I found the wannabe!
**[00:34] K**
Do you really have to save the
people who are saying all that?!
**[00:39] A**
But they're my darling faithful...
**[00:43] A**
Come on, I'm an arch priest
with the Axis Church!
**[00:46] A**
Here, look at my adventurer card!
**[00:50] Guards**
You can't go in, arch priest or not.
**[00:53] Guards**
One of the overseers just said
not to let anyone else in.
**[00:57] K**
Overseer?
**[01:00] A**
Honorable members of the Axis Church...
**[01:04] A**
It's important that you do this.
It's the right thing to do.
**[01:08] A**
By letting us through, this town will be—
**[01:10] Guards**
Oh, we're in the Eris faith.
**[01:12] A**
Why?!
**[01:13] A**
Come on, let us through!
**[01:15] A**
The water source up ahead is in danger!
**[01:17] A**
I just want to save the town!
**[01:17] K**
*Let's see how this plays out.*
**[01:19] Guards**
No means no, miss.
**[01:21] Guards**
Go on, head back home.
**[01:23] A**
Wait a minute!
**[01:24] A**
Y'know, you're actually kinda...
**[01:26] A**
pretty attractive, in a way!
**[01:28] A**
Your profile looks like a red
dragon. It's pretty cool!
**[01:32] Guard**
Are you saying I have a lizard face?!
**[01:36] A**
Fine. If you really don't want to let me in,
**[01:40] A**
I'll tell the Axis Church
that you Eris sect members
**[01:43] A**
were saying terrible things about our faith.
**[01:46] Guards**
What the hell is wrong with you?!
**[01:47] Guards**
It's stuff like this that makes
Axis cultists a pain to deal with!
**[01:50] Guards**
And that blue hair—aren't you the one
who pulled that prank where you
**[01:53] Guards**
replaced the hot springs with hot water?!
**[01:55] A**
N-No, all I did was purify the hot springs...
**[01:59] Guards**
So it was you!
**[02:00] Guards**
We definitely can't let you in!
**[02:01] Guards**
Now, get out of here!
**[02:01] K**
I figured that's how it'd go.
**[02:03] A**
Hey, wait a minute!
**[02:04] K**
Come on, Darkness. Here's one of the
few times you get to be useful.
**[02:07] D**
What do you mean, "few"?!
**[02:07] D**
I'm useful on occasion, you know!
**[02:10] D**
Hey, don't push me!
What are you trying to do?!
**[02:13] M**
Attention!
**[02:15] M**
Do you realize who this is?!
**[02:18] M**
You're in the presence of a lady of the
Dustiness family, Dustiness Ford Lalatina!
**[02:23] M**
This is an emergency!
**[02:25] K**
Come on, milady, show that pendant
you're hiding on your chest for proof!
**[02:26] (D**
Hey!
**[02:29] K**
Milady, stop resisting!
**[02:32] (D**
Just cough it up already, milady!
**[02:34] A**
Kazuma, hold her tight!
**[02:36] A**
I'll get—
**[02:38] A**
Ow, ow! Darkness, that hurts!
**[02:40] A**
Wiz, hurry up and get it!
Now's your chance to get the pendant!
**[02:43] M**
Wiz! Please, get over here!
**[02:45] M**
Aqua, keep her right hand steady!
**[02:47] Everyone**
Come on, milady, calm down!
**[02:48] A**
Wiz! Hurry it up!
**[02:50] K**
Wiz, go for it!
**[02:51] Everyone**
Milady!
**[02:52] Everyone**
I'm so sorry, Darkness-san!
**[02:54] Everyone**
I'm so, so sorry!
**[02:55] D**
Y-You guys, stop this! The Dustiness family
doesn't just wield its authority for—
**[03:04] Guards**
It's the real deal!
**[03:05] Guards**
We're so sorry for our insolence.
**[03:07] D**
KONOSUBA!
**[03:10] A**
You're such a pain.
**[03:12] A**
Do you want us to treat you as a noble
or as part of the gang? Figure it out!
**[03:16] D**
Don't call me a pain!
**[03:18] D**
Aren't you younger than I am, Kazuma?!
**[03:22] K**
I treat you this way because I genuinely
see you as a friend, Darkness.
**[03:26] K**
Yes, not as some older noble
lady named Lalatina-sama,
**[03:29] K**
but as our trusty crusader, Darkness.
**[03:31] D**
I-I see...
**[03:34] D**
In that case, I suppose it's...
**[03:37] Everyone**
So easy.
**[03:38] Everyone**
Very easy.
**[03:39] Everyone**
Talk about easy.
**[03:40] Everyone**
G-Guys!
**[03:42] M**
There it is.
**[03:43] K**
Whoa, the water's black!
**[03:45] A**
This is poisoned! Like, it's totally poisoned!
**[03:48] M**
If this is any indicator, the water source
has probably been contaminated already.
**[03:54] A**
Let's hurry!
**[04:00] K**
Wait, someone's there.
**[04:07] K**
That's...
**[04:09] (Flashback) H**
I can't swallow this!
**[04:12] (Flashback) H**
It'd make me too clean...
**[04:15] M**
The detergent...
**[04:16] A**
He looks like he's thinking
of throwing himself in there.
**[04:18] K**
He was feeling pretty violated
by the Axis Church.
**[04:22] D**
Wait!
**[04:25] K**
Look out!
**[04:27] K**
Don't do anything rash!
**[04:36] K**
KONOSUBA!
**[04:37] H**
Well, well! Are you folks sightseers?
**[04:39] H**
Y'know, these hot springs work on lower
back pain, stiff shoulders, exhaustion,
**[04:42] H**
skin care, not to mention curing the blues,
negativity, and all sorts of curses!
**[04:46] H**
There are many famous folks from all
around the world who swear by them!
**[04:50] H**
So you should—
**[04:52] W**
I think I've seen him somewhere before...
**[04:54] H**
Seen me? Why, no! I assure
you we've never met before.
**[04:57] W**
Oh, Hans-san! It's you, isn't it, Hans-san?
**[05:01] H**
Wh-Who might that be?
I'm one of the overseers—
**[05:04] W**
It's been so long, Hans-san! It's me, Wiz!
**[05:08] W**
Wiz the lich!
**[05:09] H**
I'm not sure what you mean...
**[05:11] Wiz**
If I remember, you're a type of
Deadly Poison Slime mutant, right?
**[05:16] Wiz**
Could it be you were the one
poisoning the water source?
**[05:19] D**
Slime!
**[05:20] K**
Deadly Slime?
**[05:22] W**
Hey, Hans-san, why are you ignoring me?
**[05:26] W**
It's me, Wiz! Come on, Hans-san! Hans-san!
**[05:27] H**
What do you want? I don't know you—
**[05:31] H**
Please stop shaking me!
**[05:32] W**
Did you forget about me?
**[05:35] W**
Remember, back at the Devil King's castle—
**[05:37] Hans**
Oops!
**[05:40] Hans**
I just remembered I have
important business in town—
**[05:44] D**
Where do you think you're going, Hans?!
**[05:46] (H**
Oh, right.
**[05:46] A**
We won't let you pass, Hans!
**[05:48] (H**
Oh, okay.
**[05:48] M**
Did you think your excuses
would actually work, Hans?!
**[05:51] (H**
Yeah, fine.
**[05:53] K**
Why don't you stop struggling
**[05:54] K**
and reveal yourself, Hans?!
**[05:58] Everyone**
Hans!
**[05:59] H**
Damn it!
**[06:00] H**
You jerks keep using my name with no respect!
**[06:03] H**
Wiz, didn't you say you were
going to open a store?!
**[06:06] H**
Stop slacking in a hot springs
town and get to work!
**[06:08] W**
Th-That's so mean!
**[06:10] W**
I work really hard!
**[06:11] W**
Even though the harder I work,
the less money I seem to have...
**[06:15] H**
I spent ages doing this
as quietly as possible...
**[06:19] H**
Wiz, isn't the deal that you don't help us,
apart from maintaining the barrier,
**[06:25] H**
and in exchange, you don't oppose us?
**[06:28] H**
A kind of non-intervention treaty?
**[06:30] H**
So why are you getting in my way?
**[06:32] W**
Wait, am I getting in your way?
**[06:35] W**
I just wanted to say hi
because it's been so long!
**[06:39] H**
And that's getting in my way!
**[06:41] A**
When I think of how I've
suffered because of you...
**[06:45] A**
You'd better be ready to pay.
**[06:47] H**
What now, Wiz? You want to take me on?
**[06:50] W**
These people are my friends!
**[06:53] W**
Can't we discuss this?
**[06:55] H**
You've lost your spine ever
since you became a lich, Wiz!
**[06:59] H**
When you hunted us as an arch wizard,
**[07:03] H**
you never talked about *discussing things*!
**[07:06] W**
B-Back then, I couldn't really see
what was going on around me...
**[07:09] K**
Wiz, you know him, right?
**[07:12] K**
It's probably hard for you to take
him on, so you can stay back.
**[07:17] K**
My name is Satou Kazuma!
**[07:20] K**
I have slain countless fearsome foes!
**[07:23] W**
K-Kazuma-san, I would like
to avoid fighting, but—
**[07:29] K**
Let's do this, partner.
**[07:30] M**
Chunchunmaru.
**[07:31] K**
Not!
**[07:33] H**
Very well. All who've learned my
true identity have bowed down,
**[07:37] H**
begging for mercy...
**[07:39] H**
You seem to have real backbone.
**[07:41] K**
What're you talking about? You're a
slime, the weakest of monsters!
**[07:45] K**
That deadly poison probably means
you have some poison attacks,
**[07:49] K**
but we've got Aqua, who can purify poison!
**[07:51] K**
I'm not seeing any way we lose!
**[07:54] H**
My name is Hans...
**[07:56] H**
I am one of the leaders of the Devil King's army.
**[07:58] H**
Hans the Deadly Poison Slime.
**[08:02] K**
What, now? A leader of the Devil King's army?
**[08:04] W**
Hans-san has a high price on his head,
even among the Devil King's army leaders!
**[08:08] W**
He's incredibly strong, so be careful!
**[08:10] K**
Hey, slimes are weak, right? Total small fry?
**[08:13] D**
Who told you that nonsense?!
**[08:16] D**
Slimes are fearsome foes!
**[08:18] D**
First of all, physical attacks
have nearly no effect on them.
**[08:20] D**
You can consider it over
if they get a hold of you.
**[08:23] D**
Either you'll be melted by their digestive
enzymes or they'll smother you to death!
**[08:26] K**
*What the heck?! Scary!*
**[08:27] M**
Plus, his poison is toxic enough
to affect every hot spring in town!
**[08:32] M**
Coming in contact means instant death!
**[08:34] K**
I-Instant death?!
**[08:36] A**
Don't worry, Kazuma.
**[08:38] A**
Even if you die, I'm here!
**[08:40] A**
Just don't let him eat you.
I can't resurrect you if you're digested.
**[08:47] H**
Now, face me, courageous adventurers!
***SIGN*** Emergency Quest
***SIGN*** Eliminate Devil King Army Leader
Hans the Deadly Poison Slime!
**[08:52] H**
And strike me down if you—
**[08:54] K**
Sorry! Really sorry about this!
**[09:03] A**
Hey, why are we running?!
**[09:05] K**
You idiot! Hurry up and move!
**[09:07] K**
* This is bad, bad, bad!*
* He's worse than all the others!*
**[09:10] D**
The slime... We're leaving the slime...
**[09:12] M**
Darkness, seriously, this one would kill you!
**[09:18] K**
Isn't that...
**[09:20] Crowd**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[09:24] K**
Look, let's give up on the water source.
**[09:27] K**
I mean, who'd actually miss the Axis cult?
**[09:29] A**
What are you saying?!
**[09:31] A**
The Axis Church in this
town is gonna be ruined!
**[09:35] Duo**
Isn't that a good thing?
**[09:37] W**
P-Please stop teasing Aqua-sama!
**[09:40] A**
Fine! Forget it!
**[09:47] M**
Are you sure about this? Things are
just going to get worse, at this rate.
**[09:54] K**
Guess I don't have a choice!
**[10:02] A**
Hey, you!
**[10:04] A**
Your element is poison?
No one's into that! It's too gloomy!
**[10:07] A**
You probably just joined the Devil King's
army because nobody liked you!
**[10:11] A**
Now, repent!
**[10:12] H**
What?
**[10:13] K**
Aqua!
**[10:15] A**
Kazuma!
**[10:17] H**
How do you worms have the
guts to face me again?
**[10:22] H**
Whatever it is, once I finish with these
hot springs, I'll be done with this town.
**[10:27] H**
Finally!
**[10:28] H**
I'll finally be able to leave
this disgusting town behind!
**[10:32] K**
Look, I get how you feel...
**[10:35] K**
Hey, wait! What happened to the real overseer?
**[10:40] H**
I ate him.
**[10:41] K**
Wait... What did you just...
**[10:43] H**
I said I ate him!
**[10:46] H**
I'm a slime! My instinct is to consume!
**[10:50] W**
Wiz?!
**[10:52] W**
Cursed Crystal Prison!
**[10:58] W**
The condition for my neutrality
**[11:01] W**
was that no non-combatants
were to be killed.
**[11:06] W**
Isn't that right?
**[11:07] H**
Wiz! Stop it! Cancel the magic!
**[11:10] W**
It's unavoidable that adventurers
lose their lives in battle.
**[11:15] W**
They take the lives of monsters,
**[11:17] W**
and make their livings doing so.
**[11:20] W**
They should be prepared
to meet a similar end.
**[11:23] W**
The same for knights... They collect taxes,
**[11:26] W**
and in exchange, they protect the citizenry.
**[11:29] W**
Since they receive that payment,
**[11:30] (H**
Wiz! Do you seriously want to fight me?!
**[11:31] W**
their involvement in life-and-death
battles is a natural consequence.
**[11:33] (H**
If we actually do this—
**[11:34] W**
However...
**[11:35] H**
The entire area around here
is going to be contamina—
**[11:38] W**
But the nice old man who oversaw these
hot springs didn't do anything wrong!
**[11:42] A**
Wiz is scaring me...
**[11:44] H**
To take on the woman who was
known as the Ice Witch...
**[11:48] H**
I have no other choice!
**[11:53] H**
I'll devour as my instinct commands...
**[12:05] D**
This is...
**[12:09] D**
What a splendid slime! Such a shame!
**[12:12] D**
If it weren't poisonous, I'd take
it home and make it my pet!
**[12:15] K**
Did he melt your brain?!
**[12:26] K**
Get back here! It's dangerous!
**[12:28] Crowd**
What is that?! Is that what
was polluting the hot springs?!
**[12:32] A**
Purification! Purification! Purification!
**[12:35] A**
Purification! Purification!
**[12:37] A**
Ah, it burns, it burns!
**[12:39] K**
Forget about that! Just run!
**[12:42] A**
But I can't! If I don't protect
the hot springs, my faithful...
**[12:45] Crowd**
Look!
**[12:46] Crowd**
The girl with the blue hair
was telling the truth!
**[12:49] Crowd**
Get him!
**[12:54] Crowd**
Heal! Heal! Heal!
**[12:56] A**
It's burning... It burns so much!
**[12:58] A**
Purification! Purification!
Purification! Purification!
**[13:03] Girl**
You can do it, lady!
**[13:05] D**
Watch out!
**[13:09] D**
Everyone, get back! It's dangerous!
**[13:11] D**
What're you doing, you stupid Eris cultist?!
**[13:15] Girl**
You evil cultist!
**[13:19] M**
I'll use my explosion magic
to blow him to smithereens!
**[13:23] A**
Don't! It'll pollute the entire mountain!
**[13:26] K**
Damn it!
**[13:27] K**
Wiz, isn't there anything you can do?!
**[13:29] W**
I can't freeze him at that size
with my current magic power!
**[13:33] W**
If we could make him smaller somehow...
**[13:35] Crowd**
You polluted our hot springs!
**[13:38] Crowd**
You damnable nincompoop!
**[13:50] K**
I guess even slimes have preferences...
**[13:52] M**
Kazuma!
**[13:53] K**
What's up?
**[13:53] M**
Can't you come up with some sneaky
plan to deal with this, like usual?!
**[13:57] K**
Don't call it sneaky.
**[14:02] K**
Bones?
**[14:04] Crowd**
That's the hot springs overseer!
**[14:05] Crowd**
Did that beast eat him?!
**[14:07] Crowd**
It's gonna pay!
**[14:10] K**
*He hasn't been fully digested yet...*
**[14:13] K**
*It's our only hope!*
**[14:15] K**
Aqua! You can revive someone if
they're not fully digested, right?!
**[14:19] A**
Huh? Yeah, I can!
**[14:21] K**
Wiz! You could freeze him
if he were smaller, right?!
**[14:25] W**
Y-Yes! If he were around half his current size...
**[14:28] K**
Megumin! You're gonna light
him up! Get ready to go!
**[14:32] M**
I-I can shoot it?! Okay, I'll shoot it!
**[14:35] D**
I need to protect everyone from Hans
as he's being blown away, right?
**[14:38] K**
You've got it. I'm counting on you!
**[14:43] K**
* A leader-class enemy showing*
* up in a hot springs town...*
**[14:46] K**
* Damn it, what the hell is with*
* this world's game balance?!*
**[14:49] A**
Purification! Purification!
Purification! Purification!
**[15:05] K**
I'm gonna be your meal today!
**[15:13] M**
Detonation... Detonation... Detonation...
**[15:16] M**
Wielder of the most glorious, powerful,
and grand explosion magic...
**[15:20] M**
My name is Megumin.
**[15:21] M**
The blow that I am given to strike
**[15:23] M**
turns a blind eye to the fate of my kindred,
**[15:25] M**
rendering all hope of rebirth into anguish,
**[15:27] (A**
Purification! Purification!
**[15:28] M**
and the model by which all forces are judged!
**[15:30] (A**
Purification!
**[15:32] K**
You didn't run out of luck
when you came to this town!
**[15:35] K**
It was when you picked a fight with us!
**[15:43] K**
The rest is up to you guys!
**[15:52] M**
Pitiful creature...
**[15:54] M**
Synchronize yourself with the red smoke,
and atone in a surge of blood!
**[15:58] M**
Burst forth! Explosion!
**[16:11] Girl**
Let go of me, you cultist!
**[16:11] D**
Get back!
**[16:14] Girl**
Lady?
**[16:20] W**
Cursed Crystal Prison!
**[16:56] W**
Thank goodness I was able to stop Hans
before I ran out of magic power...
**[17:03] D**
Is it over?
**[17:05] H**
To think you could push me this far...
**[17:08] D**
What?!
**[17:17] H**
But it's not over yet.
**[17:19] H**
Soon, I will devour you all and be restored!
**[17:25] Crowd**
Defeat the Devil King.
**[17:28] Crowd**
Slay the demons. Defeat the Devil King.
**[17:33] Crowd**
Slay the demons. Defeat the Devil King.
**[17:37] A**
Slay the demons. Defeat the Devil King!
**[17:45] A**
God Blow!
**[17:56] H**
I was wondering what you were up to,
but this isn't enough to defeat me!
**[18:00] H**
You pathetic priest!
**[18:05] Crowd**
Lady!
**[18:09] Priest**
Axis Church, our credo!
**[18:11] Axis**
"The Axis Church can get things done.
**[18:13] Axis**
And because you can get things done,
even if it doesn't go well, it's not your fault!"
**[18:18] Axis**
"It's society's fault that things don't work out!"
**[18:20] Axis**
"You can run away from unpleasant things!
That doesn't mean you've lost!
**[18:24] Axis**
Because, as they say, 'Sometimes
running away is winning'!"
**[18:27] Axis**
"The answer you come to
after being in doubt
**[18:29] Axis**
is usually something you'll regret,
no matter what you choose!
**[18:31] Axis**
If you're going to regret it anyway,
**[18:33] Axis**
do whatever's easiest for you in the moment!"
**[18:35] H**
What is this light?!
**[18:38] Axis**
"Do not fear growing old!
**[18:40] Axis**
Not even God knows whether you
will be happy in the future,
**[18:44] Axis**
so you should, at least, be happy now!"
**[18:47] Axis**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[18:50] Axis**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[18:54] A**
The sin of corrupting the
hot springs of my beloved faithful
**[18:58] A**
has earned you certain doom!
**[19:00] A**
Seek God's salvation and repent!
**[19:04] Axis**
Slay the demons! Defeat the Devil King!
**[19:07] H**
It can't be...
**[19:08] Dude**
Eris pads her chest!
**[19:12] A**
God Requiem!
**[19:24] A**
The wretched goddess they worship...
**[19:28] A**
It can't be...
**[19:30] A**
It was you?!
**[19:41] K**
*The battle was over.*
**[19:44] K**
* After the trouble with the*
* hot springs, we were shown...*
**[19:48] K**
*no gratitude.*
**[19:50] A**
I worked hard to purify them!
**[19:52] A**
Why's everyone so mad?!
**[19:55] K**
*Thanks to Aqua's God Requiem,*
**[19:57] K**
* all of the hot springs in Arcanretia*
* were turned into regular hot water.*
**[20:00] (Dudes**
It's just hot water! It's just hot water!
**[20:03] K**
* The Devil King army's goal of cutting*
* off the Axis Church's source of income*
**[20:07] K**
*ultimately ended up being accomplished.*
**[20:11] K**
* We were going to head home*
* by having Wiz use Teleport...*
**[20:15] K**
* But she was struck by the*
* power of the purification*
**[20:17] K**
* and looks like she could*
* vanish at any second.*
**[20:20] V**
*Come on! Come over here!*
**[20:23] K**
* So we had to return home*
* bouncing along in a wagon again.*
**[20:30] K**
That wasn't much of a hot
springs trip in the end.
**[20:33] A**
Hey, look!
**[20:35] A**
Look over there!
**[20:36] A**
I can see Axel!
**[20:52] Dust**
Hot springs, huh? Must be nice to be you!
**[20:55] Randos**
Welcome back!
**[20:56] Randos**
Hey, Kazuma! Let's get some
drinks at the guild tonight!
**[21:01] Luna**
Welcome home. Sounds like a rough trip.
**[21:06] Roughneck**
So you made it back alive.
**[21:09] Roughneck**
Maybe you really are...
**[21:11] Roughneck**
Nah, I must be imagining things.
**[21:15] YY**
Welcome home, everyone!
**[21:16] YY**
Now, Megumin, today we'll have our duel!
**[21:19] M**
You were out here waiting
every day, weren't you?
**[21:22] YT**
N-N-No, I wasn't! I just
happened to come by today!
**[21:26] M**
Oh, very well.
**[21:28] M**
I'll indulge you, since it's been a while.
**[21:30] YY**
What? Really?
**[21:31] M**
Yes.
**[21:33] A**
We're home!
**[21:34] K**
Welcome back.
**[21:35] A**
Nothing beats being in your own home!
**[21:39] K**
*Once winter ends, it'll be spring.*
**[21:42] K**
*I wake here, sleep here, and live here...*
**[21:44] K**
Rock, paper—
**[21:46] K**
*in the moment.*
**[21:47] K**
* To this unfair, impossibly cruel,*
* wonderful world...*
**[21:52] K**
*God bless it, and you.*
**[21:54] A**
Hey, Kazuma-san! The hot water's not working!
**[22:00] K**
Coming!
***SIGN*** Thanks for your support!
~From the Staff & Cast~
***SIGN*** Illustration by Mishima Kurone
**[23:35] K**
Thanks for your support, everyone!
**[23:37] K**
Our true battle has only just beg—
# OVA2 - God's Blessings on This Wonderful Work Of Art!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G64PQXN1R/gods-blessings-on-these-wonderful-works-of-art)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** KONOSUBA!2
God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
***SIGN*** Episode 11 God's Blessings on These Wonderful Works of Art!
**[01:34] MOB**
Hey, did you hear?
**[01:35] MOB**
Kazuma's party took down another
one of the Devil King's generals.
**[01:38] MOB**
I thought for sure they were a bunch
of lunkheads, but they're pretty good!
**[01:41] MOB**
They even share their coupons!
**[01:45] Waitress**
Can I get your order?
**[01:47] Kazuma**
Give it to me straight.
**[01:49] Kazuma**
Along with something nice and smoky.
**[01:51] Waitress**
Uh, sir...
**[01:53] Waitress**
What drink do you want served straight?
**[01:56] Waitress**
And we have several different smoked meats...
**[01:58] Kazuma**
Whiskey! I meant whiskey!
**[02:00] Kazuma**
Straight means a strong whiskey, obviously!
**[02:03] Kazuma**
And for the smoked meat, y'know,
I obviously meant jerky.
**[02:06] Waitress**
I'll need the brand of whiskey
you're interested in...
**[02:10] Waitress**
And jerky is actually dried meat.
**[02:13] Waitress**
If you want something smoked,
we've got some good pork at the moment...
**[02:16] Waitress**
Then that's fine! And whatever
brand you recommend, thank you!
**[02:19] Waitress**
Coming right up!
**[02:24] Mob**
Did you see him trying to look cool just now?
**[02:26] Mob**
Kazuma can barely even
hold his liquor, though.
**[02:29] Kazuma**
*Damn it! Pipe down, peanut gallery!*
**[02:31] Ran**
A-Are you Satou Kazuma-san?
**[02:36] Ran**
I just became an adventurer recently,
and I've heard all about you!
**[02:41] Ran**
We're basically the same age,
**[02:43] Ran**
but you've beaten lots of the
Devil King's generals already!
**[02:46] Ran**
I admire you so much!
Can I shake your hand?
**[02:50] Kazuma**
You seem to have some potential.
What's your name?
**[02:54] Ran**
Ran!
**[02:56] Kazuma**
Ran, eh?
**[02:57] Kazuma**
Sounds good to me.
**[02:59] Ran**
Oh my God! I can't believe it!
**[03:01] Waitress**
Here's your drink.
**[03:05] Kazuma**
*Crap.*
**[03:06] Kazuma**
*I've only had bubbly before.*
**[03:08] Kazuma**
*But I can't embarrass myself now!*
**[03:11] Kazuma**
Ran...
**[03:13] Kazuma**
This one's my treat, as a veteran adventurer.
**[03:18] Kazuma**
If you want to be like me, you'll need
to be able to handle drinks like these.
**[03:23] Kazuma**
Thank you so much!
**[03:24] Kazuma**
I'll try!
**[03:33] Kazuma**
C-Can I help you?
Did you want a handshake, too?
**[03:37] Guild**
Not at all, Satou-san.
**[03:39] Guild**
I actually had a request for you,
**[03:42] Guild**
the veteran adventurer who just
pawned his drink off on a rookie.
**[03:46] Guild**
You wouldn't refuse in front
of a fan, would you?
**[03:52] Guild**
KONOSUBA!
**[03:54] Aqua**
What?! Fight a golem?!
**[03:57] Aqua**
Are you stupid? Are you literally stupid?
**[03:58] Aqua**
I'm not doing it! We're set for money,
**[04:01] Aqua**
so I'm going live the
easy life from now on!
**[04:04] Kazuma**
The people in town are terrified, y'know!
**[04:06] Kazuma**
Don't you feel any sense
of duty as an adventurer?!
**[04:08] Aqua**
Who was the guy whining,
"No quests! No danger!"
**[04:12] Aqua**
until just a while ago?!
**[04:15] Darkness**
Golems are big, heavy, and hard, aren't they?
**[04:18] Darkness**
I can only imagine the way something
so tough would let me have it...
**[04:22] Darkness**
Very well! I, of course,
am ready to join you!
**[04:26] Kazuma**
Looks like I don't need to explain!
**[04:27] Kazuma**
You're in too, right, Megumin?
**[04:30] Megumin**
I'm afraid that I need more girth than
a golem offers to be satisfied anymore.
**[04:34] Kazuma**
You, the hothead who's
always ready to fight?!
**[04:37] Megumin**
Do you think I'm a charging
bull or a berserker?!
**[04:40] Megumin**
I have the right to choose who
I use my Explosion magic—
**[04:44] Kazuma**
This kind of enemy would
be trouble, normally,
**[04:47] Kazuma**
but with you there, it'll be over in one blast.
**[04:49] Kazuma**
And once you do this,
your already significant fame
**[04:52] Kazuma**
is bound to shine even brighter.
**[04:55] Kazuma**
The tale will be told for generations.
**[04:56] Kazuma**
And the Legend of Megumin
gains a another meaty chapter.
**[05:02] Megumin**
Well, I suppose I have to, then!
Let's go! Right now!
**[05:06] Aqua**
How can you be such a pushover, Megumin?
**[05:09] Aqua**
Well, I'm not going! I'll watch the house.
***SIGN*** Kill Quest
***SIGN*** Eliminate the golem that guards the ruins
***SIGN*** Difficulty Level:
**[05:22] Aqua**
Give it back! Give me back my holy implement!
**[05:24] Kazuma**
That must be it.
**[05:26] Aqua**
Come on! Give it back!
**[05:26] Darkness**
The giant golem doesn't seem
to be around, at a glance.
**[05:28] Aqua**
Come on, Kazuma!
**[05:29] Aqua**
You better not think you
can get away with this!
**[05:29] Megumin**
Could it have wandered off?
**[05:32] Aqua**
You can get into a lot of trouble
using this thing without being holy!
**[05:32] Megumin**
That won't do! It'll be a loss
to the page count of my legend!
**[05:35] Aqua**
Don't blame me!
**[05:36] Aqua**
Seriously, it'll be bad!
**[05:36] Kazuma**
Guess we'll have to get closer.
**[05:37] Aqua**
And it won't be my fault!
Just give it back, you thieving NEET!
**[05:41] Kazuma**
Oh, put a sock in it!
**[05:42] Kazuma**
If it's really that important,
you should take better care of it!
**[05:45] Kazuma**
You were using it to hang out the laundry!
**[05:48] Kazuma**
Well, now that we're here,
there's no running!
**[05:51] Kazuma**
Megumin can one-shot this thing. Just relax!
**[05:54] Aqua**
You do have a point.
**[05:56] Aqua**
Oh, well!
**[05:57] Aqua**
Since it's a small fry
that Megumin can one-shot,
**[05:59] Aqua**
let's wrap it up and head home!
**[06:02] Kazuma**
Why do you like setting
ominous flags so much?
**[06:05] Darkness**
All right, I'll head into the ruins first, then.
**[06:08] Darkness**
The golem could be lurking somewhere.
**[06:10] Darkness**
I's times like these when
you should rely on me.
**[06:13] Kazuma**
Yeah. You're usually useless once
the real trouble starts, after all.
**[06:18] Kazuma**
Okay, Megumin, stand by
on the edge of the ruins.
**[06:21] Megumin**
Leave it to me!
**[06:22] Megumin**
I'll blow it *and* the ruins to smithereens!
**[06:25] Kazuma**
Yeah, they didn't ask for all that.
**[06:31] Aqua**
Hey, I think the ground is shaking...
**[06:38] Darkness**
Kazuma! I think this might
be a bit much, even for me!
**[06:42] Aqua**
K-Kazuma-san...
**[06:43] Kazuma**
Yeah?
**[06:44] Aqua**
This is really bad, isn't it?
**[06:47] Megumin**
Kazuma, this thing...
**[06:48] Kazuma**
Yeah?
**[06:49] Megumin**
What is it?!
**[06:54] Kazuma**
Well, it's pretty obviously not a golem!
It's a giant humanoid robot!
**[06:59] Kazuma**
A Japanese guy who got reincarnated
here is definitely behind this!
**[07:08] Kazuma**
You okay, Darkness?!
**[07:11] Kazuma**
What's wrong?!
**[07:11] Darkness**
Kazuma, this is bad!
It's lighter than it looks!
**[07:15] Darkness**
It won't be able to really let me have it!
**[07:17] Darkness**
Although there is something appealing
**[07:20] Darkness**
about getting trampled by
something this large...
**[07:23] Kazuma**
Hey, Megumin!
**[07:25] Kazuma**
Do the Explosion magic
before it's too late for her,
**[07:27] Kazuma**
in more ways than one!
**[07:28] Megumin**
I won't!
**[07:29] Kazuma**
All right, we'll— Wait, what?
**[07:32] Megumin**
I could never destroy such
a cool-looking golem!
**[07:36] Megumin**
Kazuma, Kazuma, let's capture
it somehow and bring it home!
**[07:40] Kazuma**
This is an emergency!
What are you saying?!
**[07:42] Megumin**
I promise to feed it and take care of it!
**[07:45] Megumin**
I'll even handle walks and training!
**[07:48] Kazuma**
A pet?! You want a pet that size?!
**[07:50] Kazuma**
What is wrong with your brain?!
**[07:52] Aqua**
Hey, Kazuma! Darkness is...
**[08:05] Darkness**
S-Stop it!
**[08:08] Darkness**
Th-This is salacious!
**[08:11] Kazuma**
We should see how this plays out.
**[08:13] Megumin**
This man!
**[08:14] Darkness**
N-No!
**[08:14] Megumin**
That said, what do we do?
**[08:17] Darkness**
Don't think you'll have your way with me!
**[08:17] Megumin**
Darkness is in real trouble,
**[08:19] Megumin**
but I can't bring myself to damage that
gleaming metal and dynamic form...
**[08:22] Darkness**
Y-You may as well kill me!
**[08:24] Aqua**
I'll make you an even cooler one!
Just do something, now!
**[08:28] Megumin**
I'll hold you to that, all right?
**[08:31] Megumin**
It has to be even cooler than that one!
**[08:35] Darkness**
More... Do it more!
**[08:38] Kazuma**
Darkness! Get over here before
she finishes the incantation!
**[08:41] Megumin**
In the name of the crucible
of precepts that I encompass,
**[08:44] Megumin**
the abyssal flesh howls!
**[08:46] Megumin**
Now, become one with my vermilion conquest!
**[08:53] Darkness**
The feeling in my chest!
**[08:56] Kazuma**
Do it, Megumin!
**[08:58] Darkness**
Rupture forth, Explosion!
**[09:17] Darkness**
I am totally satisfied today!
**[09:19] Kazuma**
I bet.
**[09:20] Darkness**
Not only did I take a beating
like none I've had in ages,
**[09:22] Darkness**
but it was under a filthy gaze!
**[09:24] Kazuma**
Hey!
**[09:24] Darkness**
It's been so long since I took
on such a fulfilling quest!
**[09:28] Kazuma**
I wasn't even watching!
My filthy gaze wasn't aimed at you!
**[09:34] Megumin**
Aqua, let's take the golem's
wreckage back with us!
**[09:37] Megumin**
I'm sure that'll speed
along our construction!
**[09:39] Aqua**
How are we supposed to carry
something that heavy?
**[09:42] Megumin**
It's magnificent...
**[09:42] Aqua**
I'll make you a
Transforming-Combining Dendromaiden
**[09:45] Aqua**
out of milk cartons when
we get back, so be patient.
**[09:48] Megumin**
Milk cartons?
**[09:50] Kazuma**
Man...
**[09:55] Kazuma**
*Wait. That seems like bad news.*
**[09:58] Aqua**
Well, we're pretty awesome for taking
that thing out and coming out of it okay!
**[10:02] Aqua**
Since we all did such a good job today,
**[10:05] Aqua**
let's head home and have something tasty!
**[10:07] Kazuma**
Idiot! Why do you have to
keep setting flags like that?!
**[10:15] Kazuma**
KONOSUBA!
**[10:17] Kazuma**
And so, after realizing it was a bit
much for Darkness to handle alone,
**[10:22] Kazuma**
I courageously distracted the golem,
**[10:25] Kazuma**
and that gave Megumin the chance to
nail it with her Explosion magic.
**[10:29] Kazuma**
By the way, Aqua didn't do squat.
**[10:32] Kazuma**
But that's just how it works
when we're on the case.
**[10:37] Ran**
Your party is so amazing!
**[10:40] Kazuma**
*Well, that bit at the end with the explosion*
**[10:42] Kazuma**
*had a few exaggerations for dramatic effect,*
**[10:46] Kazuma**
* but I need to make things interesting*
* for my first fan, don't I?*
**[10:50] Mitsurugi**
Satou Kazuma! Why, if it isn't Satou Kazuma!
**[10:53] Mitsurugi**
You're drinking in the afternoon
in a place like this?
**[10:56] Mitsurugi**
Where's Aqua-sama?
**[10:57] Mitsurugi**
Is she not with you?
**[10:59] Kazuma**
You're...
**[11:02] Kazuma**
Was it... Yamamoto?
**[11:03] Kazuma**
No, Tanaka?
**[11:05] Kazuma**
Take...
**[11:05] MItsurugi**
You're not even close! It's Mitsurugi!
**[11:08] MItsurugi**
Mitsurugi Kyouya!
Try to remember it, please!
**[11:11] Ran**
M-M-Mitsurugi-san?!
**[11:13] Ran**
Mitsurugi-san, the hero who's
famous for wielding a cursed sword?!
**[11:16] Kazuma**
Wait. What is this?
**[11:18] Ran**
You're him, right? The Mitsurugi-san
who's even been the talk of the capitol?!
**[11:21] Ran**
I think I heard you defeated an
ancient dragon with a single attack!
**[11:24] Ran**
Um, m-my name is Ran!
**[11:27] Ran**
Is it okay if I... if I sh-shake your hand?
**[11:32] Mitsurugi**
Hello there. It's nice to—
**[11:34] Kazuma**
I remember now!
**[11:36] Kazuma**
Mitsurugi, right.
As in the Mitsurugi who lost to me!
**[11:39] Kazuma**
Sorry, our contest ended so
quickly, I completely forgot!
**[11:43] Ran**
Huh? Mitsurugi-san?
**[11:44] Kazuma**
I see, I see! You beat
an ancient dragon, huh?
**[11:47] Kazuma**
Wow, gosh, that sure is something!
**[11:51] Kazuma**
By the way, I've taken down three
of the Devil King's generals.
**[11:57] Mitsurugi**
You never change, do you?
**[11:59] Kazuma**
Oh, is that Gram the
Cursed Sword you got there?
**[12:02] Kazuma**
You were able to track it down and
buy it back, eh, Mitsurugi-kun?
**[12:05] Kazuma**
Well, good for you!
**[12:07] Kazuma**
You look tougher for your efforts,
Mitsurugi-kun, my boy!
**[12:12] Guild**
Excuse me, Satou Kazuma-san?
**[12:15] Guild**
I have a request for you,
**[12:16] Guild**
the man who defeated three of
the Devil King's generals...
**[12:21] Kazuma**
Before you start, I'm not
accepting any quests!
**[12:24] Kazuma**
We just got through with
that hellish golem hunt!
**[12:28] Ran**
But you said it was easy
and you got out unscathed.
**[12:31] Kazuma**
KONO...SUBA...
**[12:33] Aqua**
What?! You took on another weird quest?!
**[12:37] Aqua**
Are you stupid?
**[12:38] Aqua**
Are you one of those idiots
who only pretends to be smart?
**[12:40] Aqua**
This should be obvious,
but I'm really busy right now!
**[12:43] Aqua**
Stop trying to save face and
head to the Guild to cancel!
**[12:48] Megumin**
Aqua's right!
**[12:50] Megumin**
We don't have time to waste
on that kind of nonsense!
**[12:53] Megumin**
Now, let's put that request out of our heads
**[12:56] Megumin**
and finish Dendromaiden! Quickly!
**[12:58] Megumin**
We need to finish the construction of
Transforming-Combining Dendromaiden!
**[13:01] Kazuma**
Hey, is that thing really
made out of milk cartons?
**[13:04] Aqua**
Sure is. You want one, Kazuma?
**[13:07] Aqua**
Well, you can't have one!
**[13:08] Aqua**
There's only one Transforming-Combining
Dendromaiden in the whole world.
**[13:12] Aqua**
If you want it, you'll have
to negotiate with Megumin.
**[13:14] Aqua**
* I bet she'd actually be successful if she*
* was doing anything else with her life.*
**[13:19] Darkness**
Well, we should at least
hear what kind of request it is.
**[13:24] Darkness**
If it's a fearsome foe...
**[13:26] Darkness**
I wouldn't be opposed to accepting it!
**[13:29] Megumin**
Transforming-Combining Dendromaiden!
Transforming-Combining Dendromaiden!
**[13:29] Aqua**
I'd rather hold off on doing
any quests for a while...
**[13:32] Kazuma**
It'll be fine.
**[13:33] Kazuma**
They just want us to explore the
ruins we cleared out the other day.
**[13:34] Megumin**
Transforming-Combining Dendromaiden!
**[13:36] Kazuma**
Plus, since we defeated the golem
that was guarding the place,
**[13:40] Kazuma**
we can take any treasure we find back with—
**[13:44] Aqua**
Let's do it!
**[13:45] Everyone**
KO-NO-SU-BA!
***SIGN*** Guild Request
***SIGN*** Investigate inside the ruins
***SIGN*** Difficulty Level: Unknown
**[13:49] Aqua**
Say, this is just about
peeking inside, right?
**[13:53] Aqua**
Couldn't you just use your Lurk
skill and handle it yourself?
**[13:58] Kazuma**
I don't mind doing it that way,
**[14:00] Kazuma**
but I'll be keeping all the treasure I find.
**[14:03] Aqua**
Off we go!
**[14:04] Everyone**
KONOSUBA!
**[14:10] Megumin**
All of this magical equipment
defies even my comprehension...
**[14:13] Megumin**
What could it be used for?
**[14:18] Darkness**
From the faint aroma of this thing,
I'd guess it was a container for perfume?
**[14:23] Kazuma**
*That's an air freshener for a toilet!*
**[14:26] Kazuma**
*I'm sure of it...*
**[14:27] Kazuma**
* This place was built by a Japanese*
* person who reincarnated here!*
**[14:32] Kazuma**
Hey! My Enemy Detection skill just went off!
**[14:35] Aqua**
It's probably just a smaller version
of that golem we beat before.
**[14:39] Aqua**
Which means that Darkness
should be able to handle it.
**[14:42] Aqua**
And while she has its attention,
Kazuma takes it down!
**[14:46] Aqua**
It's not like Megumin and I can do
anything against an indoor golem,
**[14:50] Aqua**
so we'll be cheering from the rear!
**[14:52] Kazuma**
How about you cast support
magic from the rear instead?!
**[14:55] Aqua**
You've got to be kidding me!
**[14:57] Aqua**
My holy magic gets its power
from the prayers of my believers!
**[15:01] Aqua**
Why would I waste that on some shut-in NEET?
**[15:07] Aqua**
Why?! Why does it always happen to me?!
**[15:09] Aqua**
Am I really that popular?!
**[15:11] Kazuma**
Darkness, use Decoy!
Lure them away with your skill!
**[15:14] Darkness**
I already used it, but something's not right!
**[15:17] Darkness**
Could it be...
**[15:20] Megumin**
Aqua! Those are ghosts, or something
else that has possessed the golems!
**[15:24] Megumin**
Ghosts that have possessed a humanoid shape!
**[15:27] Megumin**
Undead, in other words!
**[15:30] Aqua**
God Blow!
**[15:39] Aqua**
God...
**[15:42] Aqua**
Requiem.
**[15:47] Aqua**
I am on fire today.
**[15:51] Megumin**
We haven't found anything
that looks valuable yet.
**[15:55] Darkness**
And this looks like the last room.
**[15:57] Kazuma**
Is this a vault?
**[15:58] Kazuma**
Maybe there's a hint on how
to open it somewhere...
**[16:01] Aqua**
What's this?
**[16:03] Aqua**
Is it a journal?
**[16:08] Megumin**
What in the world is that?
**[16:10] Megumin**
I'm a Crimson Demon, and even I've
never seen this language before.
**[16:13] Aqua**
It's Japanese.
**[16:15] Kazuma**
*What did the person who wrote this think?*
**[16:19] Kazuma**
* I feel a little guilty about reading*
* someone else's journal, but...*
**[16:25] Aqua**
"Parallel World Log, Day 1.
**[16:27] Aqua**
Today I arrived in this world
at the request of a goddess.
**[16:32] Aqua**
I was sent to defeat the Devil King
and save this world.
**[16:36] Aqua**
I'm sure it'll be an incredibly difficult task,
**[16:38] Aqua**
but I'm determined to see it through."
**[16:41] Kazuma**
*Hearing that made me feel embarrassed.*
**[16:45] Kazuma**
* We were sent to this world for the same*
* reason, but what have I been doing?*
**[16:50] Kazuma**
*If the receptionist lady hadn't sent me here,*
**[16:52] Kazuma**
*I'd probably be lazing around today...*
**[16:56] Aqua**
"Parallel World Log, Day 7.
**[16:59] Aqua**
I tested the power that
the goddess granted me.
**[17:02] Aqua**
It has its conditions for use,
**[17:04] Aqua**
but it's incredibly powerful.
It lets me create whatever I want.
**[17:10] Aqua**
With it, I think I could
even conquer the world.
**[17:15] Aqua**
But my wish remains the same:
**[17:17] Aqua**
defeat the Devil King,
and save the people of this world."
**[17:22] Kazuma**
*The power to create whatever he wanted...*
**[17:24] Kazuma**
* That's definitely a cheat-level power*
* that'd make world conquest possible.*
**[17:28] Kazuma**
*But he, in spite of it all,*
**[17:31] Kazuma**
*still wanted to save this world!*
**[17:35] Aqua**
"Parallel World Log, Day 113.
**[17:38] Aqua**
I've been trying, but struggling,
**[17:39] Aqua**
to create something that can
stand against the Devil King.
**[17:42] Aqua**
I think the conditions that come
with my power may be the problem.
**[17:46] Aqua**
I need a strong desire to
be able to create things...
**[17:50] Aqua**
Essentially, how much do I
want the thing I'm making?
**[17:54] Aqua**
Does that mean I don't want to defeat
the Devil King badly enough?
**[17:59] Aqua**
my doubts keep piling up."
**[18:01] Kazuma**
* The journal makes it clear*
* how much he struggled.*
**[18:05] Kazuma**
*And at the same time,*
**[18:06] Kazuma**
* I saw how much he was practicing*
* the writing of this world.*
**[18:10] Kazuma**
* The Japanese language gradually*
* began to dwindle in the journal,*
**[18:14] Kazuma**
* until it was replaced with*
* this world's language.*
**[18:18] Aqua**
"I understand what I really want.
**[18:22] Aqua**
But it's not as if I don't want
to defeat the Devil King.
**[18:26] Aqua**
I'm so lost. Just what is it I should do?
**[18:30] Aqua**
I asked myself that question again and again.
**[18:33] Aqua**
And after I finally overcame my doubts..."
**[18:38] Prof**
*I'm giving up on defeating the Demon King.*
**[18:41] Prof**
* I mean, what do you want?*
* I used to be a NEET!*
**[18:45] Prof**
* I can't change that much on the inside*
* just because I came to another world!*
**[18:49] Prof**
*I'm gonna do what I want from now on,*
**[18:50] Prof**
*and make only the stuff I really want to.*
**[18:53] Prof**
* First up is every man's dream,*
* a beautiful robot girl.*
**[18:56] Prof**
*A giant robot would be good, too.*
**[18:59] Prof**
*Oh, man, maybe both!*
**[19:01] Kazuma**
*Hey, now...*
**[19:02] Prof**
* I built a giant robot,*
* or I guess, a giant golem.*
**[19:05] Prof**
*But it's no good! I can't pilot it.*
**[19:08] Prof**
*I tried, but nope.*
**[19:10] Prof**
* It felt like being tossed around*
* inside a washing machine.*
**[19:14] Prof**
* But since I already built it, I'll have*
* it guard this place or something.*
**[19:18] Prof**
*Oh! Gotta remember to add a self-destruct.*
**[19:22] Prof**
*Parallel World Log Day 289.*
**[19:24] Prof**
* Time to start development on the*
* beautiful golem girl of my dreams.*
**[19:27] Prof**
*But it's been nothing but failure...*
**[19:29] Prof**
*I mean, her thighs are hard as metal!*
**[19:32] Prof**
*And she can't adjust her strength!*
**[19:33] Prof**
* It felt like my neck was gonna*
* snap from her rubbing my head!*
**[19:38] Prof**
*There was one other crucial defect.*
**[19:40] Prof**
*It was missing the most important feature*
**[19:42] Prof**
*a beautiful girl robot needs, damn it!*
**[19:46] Prof**
*Both the giant golem and her...*
**[19:49] Prof**
* The second I take my eyes*
* off them, they go berserk!*
**[19:51] Prof**
*Is this their rebellious phase?*
**[19:54] Kazuma**
*Whoa, hang on a sec!*
**[19:56] Prof**
*Parallel World Log, Day 563.*
**[19:59] Prof**
*I'm getting back to basics.*
**[20:01] Prof**
* Focusing on creating something that*
* suits my needs, with no compromises.*
**[20:05] Prof**
*First things first! What do I want?*
**[20:08] Prof**
* Am I a masochist or a sadist?*
* Actually, let's put a pin in that for later.*
**[20:12] Prof**
*Parallel World Log, Day 783.*
**[20:15] Prof**
*It's wrong! But why?!*
**[20:17] Prof**
*Something about the face? The hairstyle?*
**[20:20] Prof**
*Or is it the sculpt itself?*
**[20:22] Prof**
*I'm starting over from the design phase!*
**[20:25] Prof**
* If I start compromising now,*
* it'd be a waste of all my efforts!*
**[20:29] Prof**
*By the way, I'm a masochist!*
**[20:31] Prof**
*Oh, crap, I'm nasty! Woo!*
**[20:32] Prof**
*Anyway, let's put that aside for now.*
**[20:34] Kazuma**
* Yeah, I know what this is.*
* This guy is hopeless!*
**[20:38] Prof**
*Parallel World Log, Day 1,230.*
**[20:41] Prof**
*I've realized something.*
**[20:43] Prof**
*It makes sense! With my talent,*
**[20:45] Prof**
* I don't need to mess around*
* with a beautiful girl golem!*
**[20:48] Prof**
* I'll just hook up with one of the*
* major technological countries,*
**[20:50] Prof**
*then get paid and hire me a hot maid!*
**[20:54] Prof**
*Oh, man, I am so psyched now!*
**[20:56] Prof**
* To the goddess who sent me*
* to this world, many thanks!*
**[21:00] Kazuma**
It was you?!
**[21:03] Megumin**
"Postscript. If anyone
is reading this journal,
**[21:06] Megumin**
please take care of the
golems around this building.
**[21:10] Megumin**
None of them listen to a thing I say,
**[21:12] Megumin**
but I care about them like my own children."
**[21:14] Everyone**
KO! NO! SU! BA!
**[21:16] Aqua**
Come on, Kazuma, let's head back!
**[21:18] Aqua**
Let's say we checked the place out.
**[21:21] Aqua**
I've got a bad feeling about what'll
happen if we open this door!
**[21:24] Kazuma**
What are you talking about?
**[21:26] Kazuma**
The journal said there's a beautiful
girl golem behind this door!
**[21:30] Kazuma**
And there's no telling when it
might run amok like that big one.
**[21:34] Kazuma**
Veteran adventurers like us can't
just ignore something that dangerous!
**[21:39] Darkness**
What's gotten into you,
Kazuma? This isn't like you.
**[21:41] Kazuma**
It's not?
**[21:42] Darkness**
But it's good that you've realized your
responsibilities as a veteran adventurer.
**[21:46] Kauma**
Why, thanks.
**[21:46] Aqua**
Come on! I can already tell
you what's gonna happen next!
**[21:49] Kazuma**
Go on, then.
**[21:50] Aqua**
Something freaky is gonna show up,
**[21:52] Aqua**
Darkness is gonna squirm, I'm gonna cry,
**[21:54] Aqua**
and Megumin's gonna scorch everything
without listening to a word you say, Kazuma!
**[21:57] Kazuma**
Well, that's no good.
**[21:58] Aqua**
And then, since this valuable
location will have been wrecked,
**[22:01] Aqua**
we'll be stuck with the debt somehow!
**[22:02] Kazuma**
Man, cut it out. You make
it sound really convincing.
**[22:06] Megumin**
Don't be so rude, Aqua.
**[22:07] Megumin**
Even I wouldn't dare cast
magic in a place like this.
**[22:11] Megumin**
I'd do the right thing
and wait until I'm outdoors.
**[22:13] Kazuma**
Wait, what did you say?
**[22:28] Darkness**
Hey, Kazuma, look!
**[22:30] Kazuma**
This is it...
**[22:31] Kazuma**
The beautiful girl golem created
by my predecessor in this world!
**[22:35] Kazuma**
Yes! Behind this glass case
is the dream of every man!
**[22:42] Megumin**
Hey, you want to explain
that hand on my shoulder?
**[22:46] Kazuma**
I'll do that once you tell me
what you were about to do.
**[22:52] Megumin**
If there's a button, then as a Crimson Demon,
**[22:54] Megumin**
I can't rest until I've pressed it,
even if I know what it'll do!
**[22:58] Kazuma**
Don't you dare!
**[22:59] Kazuma**
That's bound to result in the thing
where whoever wakes her up
**[23:02] Kazuma**
gets the "Are you my master?" question!
**[23:04] Kazuma**
You'd better not press it! You hear me?!
**[23:06] Aqua**
Boop.
**[23:11] Aqua**
Th-That wasn't my fault.
**[23:13] Aqua**
If I had to assign blame,
**[23:15] Aqua**
I'd say it's Kazuma's fault for
saying no one should press it!
**[23:18] Kazuma**
Would it kill you to not do
something stupid for once?!
**[23:22] Darkness**
Everyone, quickly, get behind me!
**[23:33] Golem**
Which of you is my master?
**[23:36] Kazuma**
It's me.
**[23:37] Megumin**
Seriously?! He didn't even hesitate!
**[23:40] Aqua**
Yeah. I've never seen him
respond so quickly to anything!
**[23:43] Darkness**
Hey! Don't be this thing's master!
**[23:45] Darkness**
If you're into that kind of play,
**[23:47] Darkness**
I can do it with you, so get back here!
**[23:50] Kazuma**
Shut it!
**[23:51] Kazuma**
It's every man's dream to become the
master of a beautiful robot girl!
**[23:55] Golem**
You are my master?
**[23:58] Kazuma**
Yep.
**[24:04] Golem**
Now, master...
**[24:06] Golem**
It's time for your punishment.
**[24:10] Golem**
Sit down!
**[24:11] Golem**
Down, boy! Stay! Kennel! Kennel!
**[24:15] Prof**
*By the way, I'm a masochist!*
**[24:17] Prof**
*Oh, crap, I'm nasty! Woo! Oh, man, am I nasty!*
**[24:21] Golem**
Hey, jerk! What's up?! Squeal for me!
**[24:24] Golem**
Let me hear you squeal!
Come on, nice and loud!
**[24:27] Kazuma**
The face is definitely not the problem here!
**[24:32] Golem**
Enjoy play.
**[24:35] Kazuma**
And that's how it happened.
**[24:38] Kazuma**
Afterward, my skilled execution ensured
**[24:41] Kazuma**
the golems of the ruins would rest in peace.
**[24:47] Aqua**
Hey, he's been bragging
to that rookie adventurer
**[24:50] Aqua**
about his fantasies all the time lately.
**[24:52] Aqua**
When in reality that crazy
thing that came after us
**[24:56] Aqua**
had Darkness squirming, me crying,
**[24:59] Aqua**
and Megumin scorching everything
without listening to a word he said!
**[25:03] Aqua**
Plus, with the ruins destroyed,
**[25:06] Aqua**
we even had to pay damages for
failure to complete the quest!
**[25:08] Megumin**
Shh!
**[25:10] Megumin**
Something like a fan of
Kazuma's is a rare find.
**[25:13] Megumin**
Let's leave them be.
**[25:15] Megumin**
It won't be long before he messes up
and she gets sick of him, anyway!
**[25:18] Darkness**
Indeed. And he's bound to come
back crying when that happens.
**[25:22] Darkness**
Let's be kind to him when he does.
**[25:25] Ran**
Really? That's quite impressive!
**[25:27] Ran**
Um, I'll talk to you next time!
**[25:31] Kazuma**
*Huh? Did I do something wrong?*
**[25:34] Kazuma**
*No, no, nothing I can think of...*
**[25:36] Kazuma**
* I mean, maybe I repeated the*
* same story once or twice...*
**[25:41] Kazuma**
Thanks for the drinks!
**[25:42] Waitress**
Come again!
**[25:48] Kazuma**
Some kind of argument?
**[25:50] Kazuma**
Since she's my first fan,
**[25:52] Kazuma**
I guess a veteran adventurer
like me should help her out.
**[25:54] Ran**
I swear...
**[25:56] Ran**
I heard this was going to be an easy
job, just motivating some NEET,
**[26:00] Ran**
but it's not worth what it's paying anymore!
**[26:02] Ran**
He chases me down every day
and repeats the same stories!
**[26:07] Ran**
The other adventurers are starting
to say I have terrible taste in men!
**[26:10] Ran**
You gotta pay me extra for this!
**[26:12] Guild**
I understand your complaints,
but you were made aware of all this
**[26:17] Guild**
when you accepted such a high-paying job.
**[26:19] Guild**
That party's quite troublesome,
**[26:21] Guild**
but they've managed some
real accomplishments.
**[26:23] Guild**
Too many to let them just sit idle.
**[26:25] Ran**
I get that, but that doesn't
mean I should have to...
**[26:33] Aqua**
Look at that! Kazuma's quaking!
**[26:36] Megumin**
Come on, don't laugh at him!
**[26:38] Megumin**
This is even worse than getting sick of him!
**[26:39] Megumin**
She was leading him on the whole time!
**[26:42] Darkness**
W-Well, let's all be kind
to him when he gets back...
**[26:48] Guild**
Oh, um, Satou Kazuma-san!
It's not what you think!
**[26:51] Guild**
See, it was a request from the
higher-ups at the Guild...
**[26:55] Guild**
It's just... y'know, Kazuma-san,
I've always thought you, um...
**[27:01] Ran**
I just accepted the request, so...
**[27:03] Ran**
But, uh, what I said about
admiring you was true, so...
**[27:09] Both**
You're sorta kinda okay, you know?
**[27:15] Kazuma**
Steal!
**[27:16] Both**
No!
# Movie
# M1 - Legend of Crimson
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6KE0J8E6/konosuba--gods-blessing-on-this-wonderful-world--legend-of-crimson)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Capture Quest
***SIGN*** Collect Migrating Tuna
***SIGN*** Quest Failed
**[01:00] Customer 1**
Did you hear? Starting next year,
there won't be any more tuna.
**[01:04] Customer 2**
Some crazy mage screwed
up the entire landscape.
**[01:08] Customer 3**
I always look forward to tuna season...
**[01:12] Kazuma**
Zero points.
**[01:13] Megumin**
What?! Come on, today's Explosion magic
was worth at least worth 120 points!
**[01:17] Kazuma**
It was worth nothing,
and that's being generous!
**[01:19] (Flashback) Megumin**
—sion!
**[01:19] Kazuma**
You let loose an Explosion
because you thought
**[01:22] Kazuma**
a monster was going to take our tuna?!
**[01:24] Kazuma**
What's the point if you blow up the fish, too?!
**[01:25] (Flashback) Megumin**
—sion!
**[01:26] Kazuma**
Would it kill you to learn some
other advanced magic already?!
**[01:29] Darkness**
Kazuma, that's going too far.
**[01:31] Kazuma**
You reek of fish.
**[01:36] Kazuma**
As soon as we got on the water,
they were gnawing on you!
**[01:38] Aqua**
Hey, are we in debt again now?
**[01:41] Aqua**
What are we gonna do?!
**[01:42] Aqua**
I don't wanna work part-time anymore!
**[01:45] Kazuma**
*The arch priest who makes everything a pain.*
**[01:48] Kazuma**
* The arch wizard who makes*
* everything go to waste.*
**[01:51] Kazuma**
* And the crusader who makes*
* everything smell like wild game.*
**[01:54] Kazuma**
* It seems my adventure with these useless*
* comrades is headed for its climax!*
**[01:59] Lady Adventurer 31**
Isn't stealing underwear
the only thing he's good at?
**[02:03] Lady Adventurer 1B**
He's the kind of scumbag who'd dropkick
a woman without a second thought!
**[02:06] Lady Adventurer 1B**
Scumzuma! Scumzuma! Scumzuma!
**[02:11] Kazuma**
*If this was an anime or a video game,*
**[02:13] Kazuma**
* I'd probably have some*
* romantic interests by now...*
**[02:20] Kazuma**
Hey, it's Yunyun.
What's got you so looking so intense?
**[02:25] Yunyun**
K-Kazuma-san...
**[02:26] Kazuma**
Uh, yeah?
**[02:27] Yunyun**
I... I...
**[02:30] Yunyun**
I want to have your baby!
**[02:34] Kazuma**
*And thus begins my popular phase!*
***SIGN*** God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
Legend of Crimson
***SIGN*** The Movie
**[02:48] Aqua**
Ow!
**[02:50] Aqua**
Why'd you scratch me?!
**[02:52] Kazuma**
Could you say that again for me?
**[02:55] Yunyun**
I-I said I want to have a baby with you!
**[03:00] Kazuma**
I've always wanted to start with a daughter...
**[03:03] Yunyun**
N-No! The first child has to be a boy!
**[03:06] Kazuma**
*I thought she was on the meek side,*
**[03:09] Kazuma**
*but she actually knows how to speak her mind!*
**[03:11] Megumin**
What is wrong with you, Yunyun?!
**[03:13] Aqua**
Stop! Chomusuke!
**[03:14] Darkness**
Do you realize what kind of man he is?!
**[03:16] Megumin**
You need to snap out of it!
**[03:17] Megumin**
What in the world's gotten into you?
**[03:19] Yunyun**
If Kazuma and I don't have a baby,
the world will... And the Devil King...
**[03:24] Megumin**
The Devil King?
**[03:25] Kazuma**
I see. The fate of the world, huh?
**[03:28] Kazuma**
It's all right, dear. You can leave
the world and the Devil King to me.
**[03:31] Kazuma**
Once we have this baby,
**[03:34] Kazuma**
the Devil King will be dealt with
and the world saved, right?
**[03:37] Kazuma**
How could I possibly refuse someone in need?
**[03:41] Darkness**
B-But you always try to get out
of monster extermination quests!
**[03:45] Megumin**
Seriously!
**[03:46] Kazuma**
Shut it!
**[03:49] Kazuma**
Keep your noses out of our
relationship, got it?!
**[03:51] Kazuma**
I'm finally in my popular phase! So buzz off!
**[03:55] Megumin**
He's mad at *us*?
**[03:56] Megumin**
But if an acquaintance of mine is
getting involved with a shady guy,
**[03:59] Megumin**
it's only natural that I'd speak up!
**[04:01] Yunyun**
C-Calm down, everyone!
**[04:02] Yunyun**
I'm sorry! This is my fault!
Please, just calm down!
**[04:05] Kazuma**
Wonderful! Magnificent!
**[04:07] Kazuma**
For the first time ever,
I'm glad I came to this world!
**[04:09] Kazuma**
And what is with you two?
Do you secretly like me or something?
**[04:12] Kazuma**
Are you jealous because of my
romantic developments with Yunyun?
**[04:16] Kazuma**
Then you should've just
said so, you tsundere duo!
**[04:18] Megumin**
How dare you?!
**[04:19] Yunyun**
Megumin, the Crimson Demon Village...
**[04:20] Megumin**
Why would anyone be jealous about that?!
**[04:21] Yunyun**
The Crimson Demon Village
is going to be wiped out!
**[04:23] Megumin**
You must think—
**[04:25] Multi**
KONOSUBA!
**[04:29] Aqua**
Your tea.
**[04:30] Yunyun**
Th-Thank you...
**[04:35] Megumin**
Now, what exactly is going on?
**[04:38] Yunyun**
I got this letter from my father...
**[04:43] Megumin**
"By the time you receive this letter,
**[04:45] Megumin**
I will surely have passed on."
**[04:53] Megumin**
It says the Crimson Demon Village is
under attack by the Devil King's forces.
**[04:57] Megumin**
"A fortune-teller saw a future where
the village would be devastated...
**[05:01] Megumin**
But they also saw a light of hope.
**[05:04] Megumin**
That light was the only survivor of
the Crimson Demons, Yunyun."
**[05:08] Megumin**
How is she the only survivor?
**[05:11] Yunyun**
Forget that, just keep reading!
**[05:12] Megumin**
But what happened to me?!
**[05:16] Megumin**
"As the only survivor,
**[05:18] Megumin**
she would meet a certain man
in the town of beginners.
**[05:22] Megumin**
This man, though unremarkable
and with no special power,
**[05:25] Megumin**
will become her spouse."
**[05:28] Kazuma**
Why'd you look at me after reading that?
**[05:31] Kazuma**
And was that seriously all it
took to convince you it was me?!
**[05:34] Megumin**
"Then, as time passes,
**[05:36] Megumin**
the son born to her and this
man would go on a journey.
**[05:40] Megumin**
But the boy did not know...
**[05:42] Megumin**
that he would be the one to avenge
his clan and slay the Devil King..."
**[05:49] Kazuma**
O-Our little boy's gonna beat the Devil King?!
**[05:52] Darkness**
Wait a second, Kazuma!
**[05:53] Aqua**
Hey, that doesn't work for me!
**[05:55] Aqua**
That seriously isn't gonna cut it!
**[05:57] Aqua**
I can't wait that long!
**[05:59] Aqua**
I want the Devil King defeated
as soon as possible!
**[06:01] Aqua**
Do you really expect me to
wait until your kid grows up?!
**[06:04] Aqua**
Can't we wrap this up in three years or so?
**[06:06] Aqua**
Because if not, then I want you
to forget about this prophecy!
**[06:09] Kazuma**
You seriously want a toddler
to take on the Devil King?
**[06:12] Yunyun**
Our village has very skilled
fortune-tellers. So...
**[06:17] Kazuma**
I understand. In that case,
you can count on me.
**[06:20] Kazuma**
It's to save the world. It must be done.
**[06:21] Darkness**
I-I can't believe you!
**[06:23] Darkness**
You're usually so wishy-washy!
Why the sudden streak of manliness?!
**[06:27] Kazuma**
Shut up! Stop talking, boobs!
**[06:28] Megumin**
"Heroic Tales of the
Crimson Demons, Chapter 1."
**[06:29] Darkness**
Boobs?!
**[06:30] Kazuma**
It's just having a kid!
Or is that a crime now?!
**[06:31] Megumin**
"Written by Arue."
**[06:38] Yunyun**
Arue, you dummy!
**[06:39] Kazuma**
Wait, what does that mean?! Explain!
**[06:41] Kazuma**
What happens to my kid?! What do I do?!
**[06:44] Kazuma**
Do I strip here? Or in my room?!
**[06:47] Megumin**
Arue is a classmate of ours from the
village who wants to be an author.
**[06:51] Darkness**
So it was just a story, then...
**[06:54] Darkness**
But what about that first letter?
**[06:56] Megumin**
I believe this one is genuine.
**[06:59] Megumin**
The Crimson Demons have
been a thorn in the side
**[07:02] Megumin**
of the Devil King's army for a long time.
**[07:04] Kazuma**
Wait, hold up! What do I do about
my masculine obligation now?!
**[07:08] Kazuma**
Hey, Yunyun?
**[07:09] Kazuma**
Aren't we supposed to start a
bittersweet relationship now?
**[07:11] Darkness**
You are not!
**[07:12] Darkness**
Megumin, why are you so calm about this?
**[07:15] Darkness**
Aren't you worried about
your family and classmates?
**[07:17] Yunyun**
Th-That's right!
**[07:19] Yunyun**
What should we do, Megumin?!
**[07:21] Megumin**
The Crimson Demons are feared
by the Devil King for a reason.
**[07:24] Megumin**
I have a hard time believing our
village will go down without a fight.
**[07:28] Megumin**
Besides, as long as the chief's
daughter, Yunyun, is safe,
**[07:32] Megumin**
we won't die out, even if
the village is destroyed.
**[07:36] Megumin**
So we need only think of it in these terms:
**[07:39] Megumin**
"Our friends from the village will
always live on... in our hearts."
**[07:44] Yunyun**
Megumin, you monster!
**[07:48] Megumin**
KONOSU—bahck!
**[07:49] Yunyun**
I am so, so sorry!
**[07:52] Kazuma**
H-Hey, it's no big deal.
**[07:54] Kazuma**
But what are you gonna do?
**[07:56] Yunyun**
Well, I think I'll head back to the village.
**[07:59] Yunyun**
I have... f-friends... there.
**[08:03] Kazuma**
* She sure hesitated to use*
* the word "friends" there.*
**[08:07] Yunyun**
Everyone, if you'll excuse me.
**[08:27] Wiz**
Teleporting?
**[08:29] Wiz**
You need me to send you near
the Crimson Demon Village, then?
**[08:32] Kazuma**
Yeah, the tsundere here feels homesick.
**[08:35] Megumin**
Wh-Who are you calling a tsundere?!
**[08:37] Vanir**
Well, look who it is!
**[08:39] Vanir**
The man with the easiest-to-level class,
**[08:40] Vanir**
who somehow still manages
to be under-leveled!
**[08:43] Vanir**
The girl who's been useless as of late,
except at calling in familial favors!
**[08:47] Vanir**
The small-time priest who's
overflowing with obnoxious light,
**[08:49] Vanir**
and the girl from the joke race who
can only use joke magic! Welcome, all!
**[08:54] Vanir**
I was actually hoping to run into you.
**[08:55] Vanir**
I've drawn up our little contract.
**[08:58] Kazuma**
You're really gonna go
through with this, right?
**[09:00] Vanir**
But of course!
**[09:01] Vanir**
I'll buy the rights to Satou Kazuma's intellectual
property library for 300 million eris.
**[09:06] Satou**
O-Okay!
**[09:07] Vanir**
That said, my debt-ridden fellow,
the deal hasn't been completed yet.
**[09:08] Wiz**
Here you are.
**[09:11] Wiz**
Drink up.
**[09:12] Vanir**
I haven't settled on a craftsman to
build the products you've dreamed up.
**[09:17] Kazuma**
Hey, man!
**[09:20] Vanir**
Hands off the merchandise,
you walking blight!
**[09:23] Aqua**
Excuse me?! I thought the
customer was always right!
**[09:25] Aqua**
And I'm a goddess, so I'm extra right!
**[09:28] Aqua**
So show me the respect a goddess deserves!
**[09:30] Vanir**
How dare you try and lecture me
**[09:32] Vanir**
after damaging my merchandise,
you poverty-stricken goddess?!
**[09:35] Vanir**
Wiz, transport them out of here immediately!
**[09:38] Vanir**
So irritating!
**[09:39] Wiz**
Okay, I'll send you to the vicinity
of the Crimson Demon Village now.
**[09:43] Wiz**
I wish you a wonderful
journey and experience.
**[09:46] Wiz**
Teleport!
**[09:50] Kazuma**
We're off!
**[09:57] Vanir**
What is it?
**[09:58] Wiz**
Isn't the Crimson Demon Village near...
***SIGN*** Emergency quest!!
***SIGN*** Survive! Defend yourselves!!
**[10:17] Kazuma**
Where the hell did you teleport us, Wiz?!
**[10:26] Orc 3**
Hold it right there!
**[10:28] Orc 1**
Hey there, handsome!
Wanna have some fun with me?
**[10:32] Kazuma**
Why is there a mob of lady orcs?!
**[10:35] Megumin**
Kazuma, there aren't any
male orcs left in the world!
**[10:39] Megumin**
They were wiped out ages ago!
**[10:42] Megumin**
And on the rare occasion that one is born,
**[10:44] Megumin**
they're usually overworked by the females
and die before they can fully mature!
**[10:47] Megumin**
The surviving female orcs are known
for capturing males of other races,
**[10:51] Megumin**
dragging them back to their communities,
and doing all kinds of crazy stuff to them!
**[10:54] Megumin**
They're natural-born predators of men!
**[10:57] Orc 1**
Come spend a few days in our village
and you'll have a harem, baby!
**[11:00] Orc 1**
We'll give you a taste of heaven on earth!
**[11:03] Kazuma**
No, thank you!
**[11:05] Kazuma**
* I just turned down a lady's*
* invitation for the first time!*
**[11:09] Darkness**
Wait! Orcs are supposed to be the
natural predators of lady knights!
**[11:11] Darkness**
Male orcs! Renowned for their libido,
attacking women the second they see them!
**[11:16] Megumin**
They're all dead.
**[11:19] Aqua**
Darkness!
**[11:23] Orc 1**
I'm gonna have your babies!
**[11:25] Orc 2**
No, me!
**[11:26] Orc 3**
I think I'd like a son first!
And then 60 boys, and 40 girls!
**[11:31] Orc 3**
We'll move into a white house by the sea
**[11:32] Orc 3**
and spend every day all over each other!
**[11:35] Kazuma**
Let me go! I just wanna go home!
**[11:42] Both**
Kazuma!
**[11:45] Orc 3**
Okay, this won't take long!
Just close your eyes!
**[11:48] Kazuma**
Save me, Megumin! Do the thing!
The thing you always do!
**[11:51] Megumin**
I can't use it at this range!
**[11:54] Megumin**
Darkness, stop being depressed!
**[11:56] Kazuma**
Can we talk?! Let's talk!
**[11:58] Orc 3**
Pillow talk?! I'd love to!
**[12:01] Orc 3**
Go ahead and tell me all the dirtiest
fantasies you've kept bottled up!
**[12:07] Kazuma**
P-Please stop!
**[12:09] Kazuma**
Wait, your name! I don't even
know your name or age yet!
**[12:13] Kazuma**
This might be my first time!
**[12:16] Kazuma**
Can we maybe start with introductions?!
**[12:18] Kazuma**
I'm Satou Kazuma!
**[12:20] Orc 3**
I'm Swatti the orc, and
I'm a sweet 16-year-old!
**[12:24] Orc 3**
Now, how about you introduce me
to what you've got down here?
**[12:26] Orc 3**
Let me meet your big little boy!
**[12:32] Kazuma**
But he's so shy!
**[12:34] Kazuma**
We made our introductions, so could
we call it a wrap for today?!
**[12:38] Kazuma**
Aqua! Aqua, save me!
**[12:39] Yunyun**
Bottomless Swamp!
**[12:45] Yunyun**
Orcs who live near the Crimson Demon Village!
**[12:49] Yunyun**
I'm willing to overlook this
because we're neighbors!
**[12:52] Yunyun**
Now, begone!
**[12:54] Kazuma**
Yunyun! It's Yunyun!
**[12:59] Megumin**
Kazuma!
**[13:00] Aqua**
Kazuma-san!
**[13:08] Kazuma**
Yunyun! Oh, Yunyun!
**[13:11] Kazuma**
Thank you so much!
**[13:13] Yunyun**
It's all right, don't worry.
**[13:15] Yunyun**
Um... Y-You're covering my robe in snot!
***SIGN*** Quest Failed
***SIGN*** Kazuma was psychologically scarred
***SIGN*** Kazuma was psychologically scarred
***SIGN*** Orc (♀)
**[13:28] Aqua**
There, there.
That was scary, wasn't it, Kazuma?
**[13:30] Aqua**
You're okay now, though. It's all right.
**[13:33] Darkness**
What exactly happened
while I was passed out?
**[13:37] Darkness**
We only just started this journey.
**[13:39] Kazuma**
I am so grateful, Yunyun.
**[13:41] Kazuma**
To be specific, from now on, if anyone
asks me, "Who do you look up to?"
**[13:46] Kazuma**
I'm going to answer "Yunyun!" right away.
**[13:49] Yunyun**
P-Please don't do that!
**[13:51] Yunyun**
It almost sounds sarcastic!
**[13:53] Yunyun**
What are you all doing here, anyway?
**[13:56] Yunyun**
Megumin, were you worried
about the village after all?
**[14:01] Megumin**
I just remembered some
business I had back home.
**[14:03] Yunyun**
You just won't admit it!
**[14:04] Yunyun**
You really are worried about everyone!
**[14:07] Yunyun**
Aren't you?
**[14:08] Yunyun**
Kazuma, would you like to hear an
embarrassing secret about Yunyun?
**[14:13] Yunyun**
We Crimson Demons are born with
a tattoo somewhere on our bodies.
**[14:18] Yunyun**
And in the case of Yunyun,
if you can believe it...
**[14:22] Yunyun**
Hey, cut it out!
**[14:24] Yunyun**
How do you even know where my tattoo is?!
**[14:27] Yunyun**
You can't use your joke Explosion
magic around here, anyway!
**[14:30] Yunyun**
So I can easily restrain you if I have to!
**[14:33] Megumin**
Aqua, I need support magic.
**[14:35] Megumin**
I think this girl needs to
be taught a painful lesson.
**[14:37] Yunyun**
Y-You coward!
You never play fair, Megumin!
**[14:40] Yunyun**
Never once, ever!
**[14:42] S. Goblin**
Hey, over here! I hear human voices!
**[14:51] Megumin**
Do you suppose they're with
the Devil King's army?
**[14:54] Megumin**
This is because of your short
temper and shouting, Yunyun!
**[14:58] Yunyun**
But Megumin, you've got
a shorter fuse than me!
**[15:00] Megumin**
Say that again!
**[15:02] Darkness**
Enough, you two!
If you're too loud, they'll find us.
**[15:05] Darkness**
Kazuma, say something!
**[15:08] Kazuma**
Hey, who gives a damn?!
Tell me where Yunyun's tattoo is!
**[15:11] S. Goblin**
Found them! They're over here!
They were hiding in the bushes!
**[15:14] Darkness**
What in the world is wrong with you?!
**[15:18] S. Goblin**
There's even some Crimson Demon brats!
**[15:32] Aqua**
Well, if it isn't a bunch of discount,
wannabe demons!
**[15:34] Aqua**
Oh, my!
**[15:36] Aqua**
What might a bunch of ogre-looking wash-outs
**[15:38] Aqua**
who couldn't even cut it as
lesser demons want with us?
**[15:44] Aqua**
Look, I'll let you walk away
this one time, so scram.
**[15:47] Aqua**
Go on, get!
**[15:51] S. Goblin**
Hey, priest lady, what gives?
**[15:53] S. Goblin**
The Crimson Demons put us through hell,
and you've got two of them!
**[15:57] S. Goblin**
You really think we're
gonna just let them walk?!
**[16:01] Megumin**
I seem to recall you saying
my magic is a joke.
**[16:04] Megumin**
Perhaps I should remind you
of just how serious it can be.
**[16:09] Yunyun**
W-Wait a second... You're not gonna...
**[16:13] Megumin**
Explosion!
**[16:23] Megumin**
Did you see that?!
My ultimate spell, Explosion magic!
**[16:26] Megumin**
Well, would you still call that a joke spell?!
**[16:29] Megumin**
How about it, Kazuma?!
What score would you give that Explosion?!
**[16:32] Kazuma**
You get negative 90 points!
**[16:34] Kazuma**
What now?! Because we're in no
condition to carry you away now!
**[16:38] S. Goblin**
H-H-Holy crap, that was scary...
**[16:41] S. Goblin**
But now my reinforcements are here.
**[16:44] S. Goblin**
Say your prayers, people!
**[16:47] S. Goblin**
Time to cry and beg for mercy,
not that it's gonna help!
**[16:58] Bukkororii**
Not even a scrap of flesh will remain!
**[17:01] Bukkororii**
The dark flame born from my
ebon heart will scorch you!
**[17:05] Red Eye Dead Slayer C**
Slumber for eternity in the
frozen embrace of my ice!
**[17:10] REDS E**
I... kill... you.
**[17:14] Soketto**
Now... it is born!
**[17:16] S. Goblin**
Aw, crap!
**[17:18] Bukkororii**
Light of Saber!
**[17:19] REDS C**
Light of Saber!
**[17:21] REDS D**
...Saber!
**[17:22] Soketto**
...ber!
**[17:31] Kazuma**
* Wait, what happened to the dark*
* flames and frozen embraces?*
**[17:36] Kazuma**
*No doubt about it, though.*
**[17:38] Kazuma**
*Those red eyes...*
**[17:40] Bukkororii**
We heard an explosion in the distance...
**[17:43] Bukkororii**
and here we find Megumin and Yunyun.
**[17:46] Megumin**
We were told that the village
might be in danger.
**[17:51] Bukkororii**
I'm curious, Megumin. Are these
people your adventuring party?
**[18:02] Bukkororii**
I am called Bukkororii!
**[18:03] Bukkororii**
The son of the foremost cobbler
among the Crimson Demons!
**[18:06] Bukkororii**
Arch wizard, and wielder of advanced magic!
**[18:09] Kazuma**
Hey there. I'm called Satou Kazuma.
**[18:13] Kazuma**
From my home in Axel,
I have mastered countless skills
**[18:15] Kazuma**
and used them to battle
the Devil King's generals.
**[18:19] Bukkororii**
No outsider has been able to
properly return a greeting before!
**[18:22] Bukkororii**
Megumin, your friends seem really nice.
**[18:27] Bukkororii**
The village is still some distance away.
Let us take you there.
**[18:31] Bukkororii**
Teleport!
**[18:46] Bukkororii**
Welcome to the
Crimson Demon Village, outsiders.
**[18:49] Bukkororii**
And it's good to have you
back, Megumin, Yunyun.
**[18:59] Yunyun**
D-Dad? Could you repeat that?
**[19:04] Chief**
That was just me sending you an update!
**[19:07] Dad**
Uh, sir, what exactly do you mean?
**[19:09] Yunyun**
But it said, "By the time you receive
this letter, I will surely have passed on."
**[19:13] Chief**
That's the traditional Crimson Demon greeting!
**[19:16] Yunyun**
But you said you wouldn't be able
to destroy the Devil King's fortress!
**[19:19] Chief**
Yeah.
**[19:20] Chief**
The village can't decide whether to destroy
it or leave it as a tourist attraction.
**[19:25] Kazuma**
Yunyun, can I punch your dad in the face?
**[19:29] Yunyun**
Go ahead.
**[19:30] Chief**
Yunyun?!
**[19:32] Darkness**
If the Devil King's army is nearby,
then is a general...
**[19:35] Chief**
Sure, there's one with them.
Strong with magic, I believe.
**[19:37] Chief**
Should be showing up anytime now.
**[19:40] Speaker**
*Devil King Army alert.*
**[19:42] Speaker**
* Anyone available, please assemble*
* at the entrance to the village.*
**[19:45] Speaker**
*The enemy force numbers around 1,000.*
**[19:48] Both**
A thousand?!
***SIGN*** Devil King Forces Approaching!
**[19:55] Goblin R**
Sylvia-sama! Retreat!
**[19:58] Goblin R**
You have to survive,
even if the rest of us don't!
**[20:01] Goblin H**
Damn it! Damn it!
If we could just get close enough—
**[20:05] Goblin N**
I said we never should've
attacked the Crimson Demons!
**[20:08] Goblin N**
Nobody ever listens to me!
**[20:11] Goblin O**
Suck on this boulder!
**[20:19] Kazuma**
Holy crap...
**[20:21] Kazuma**
This is... so impressive, it's freaky, honestly.
**[20:24] Chief**
What do you think?
**[20:26] Chief**
We've been wondering if the light
show might attract tourists!
**[20:29] Multi**
KONOSUBA...
**[20:32] Kazuma**
So, those are real Crimson Demons, huh?
**[20:36] Megumin**
When you put it that way, it makes
it sound like you know a fake one.
**[20:40] Megumin**
Why don't you explain exactly
what you mean by that?
**[20:45] Aqua**
Hey, Megumin, is that your stable?
**[20:50] Megumin**
That's not a stable. It's the house.
**[21:07] Kazuma**
Is this your little sister, Megumin?
**[21:09] Kazuma**
She's pretty cute!
**[21:11] Aqua**
It's like having a mini Megumin!
**[21:14] Aqua**
Hey, want some candy?
**[21:16] Megumin**
I'm back, Komekko.
**[21:23] Komekko**
Dad! Megumin's back, and she's snared a man!
**[21:28] Kazuma**
Hey, little missy!
Could we perhaps discuss this?!
**[21:30] Kazuma**
KONOSUBA!
**[21:41] Kazuma**
*What do I do?*
**[21:43] Kazuma**
* The one who's supposed to smooth*
* a situation like this over is...*
**[21:51] Kazuma**
*Damn you!*
**[21:53] Aqua**
Look at this!
**[21:55] Aqua**
See how the mug moves around
once I've flipped it over?
**[21:58] Komekko**
Oh, wow! How'd you do it?!
How are you doing that?
**[22:02] Darkness**
It's a magnet!
It must be some kind of magnet!
**[22:04] Aqua**
No, there are no magnets or magic involved!
**[22:06] Hyoizaburo**
So...
**[22:08] Hyoizaburo**
What exactly is the nature of your
relationship with our daughter?
**[22:13] Kazuma**
Like I've been saying, we're just frie—
**[22:17] Yuiyui**
Honey!
**[22:18] Yuiyui**
Stop! No more flipping
the table and breaking it!
**[22:22] Yuiyui**
We don't have that kind of money! Stop!
**[22:36] Hyoi**
Forgive me. I lost my composure.
**[22:38] Hyoi**
It's just that you kept insisting so
shamelessly that you're only friends...
**[22:46] Kazuma**
This isn't much, but here...
**[22:50] Hyoi**
Dear, I believe Kazuma-san
meant to give this to me.
**[22:55] Yuiyui**
Oh, really? After all that bluster just now,
**[22:57] Yuiyui**
you're being polite enough
to call him Kazuma-*san*?
**[23:01] Yuiyui**
You really shouldn't. It's embarrassing.
**[23:04] Yuiyui**
This is going to be our dinner tonight.
**[23:06] Yuiyui**
I'm not going to let you
snack on it with your booze.
**[23:09] Kazuma**
Ma'am, those are just dumplings...
**[23:11] Kazuma**
They don't make much of
a snack, let alone a meal.
**[23:14] Komekko**
Hey, is this the kind of food
that actually fills you up,
**[23:16] Komekko**
instead of the watery rice
porridge we usually eat?!
**[23:22] Kazuma**
It *really* isn't much, but here...
**[23:26] Hyoi**
We're so glad to have you, Kazuma-san!
**[23:28] Hyoi**
Dear, bring out some of the good tea!
**[23:30] Yuiyui**
We only have one type of tea, honey.
**[23:33] Yuiyui**
KONOSUBA!
**[23:37] Hyoi**
I don't care what you feed us!
You can't have Komekko!
**[23:40] Kazuma**
I don't want her!
That's not what I'm trying to do!
**[23:43] Kazuma**
Komekko, you can have the rest.
**[23:45] Komekko**
I can?! Yay!
**[23:48] Yuiyui**
You seem nice enough, so I won't object...
**[23:51] Yuiyui**
But I really think you should pay off
your debts before taking in our daughter.
**[23:57] Kazuma**
I just told you that we're only friends!
**[23:59] Yuiyui**
But in her letters...
**[24:01] Kazuma**
Can I ask you what she wrote, exactly?
**[24:09] Yuiyui**
Well, for starters...
**[24:11] Yuiyui**
You left her covered in a sticky
fluid and made sport of her.
**[24:14] Yuiyui**
When she depleted her magic power,
**[24:15] Yuiyui**
you carried her on your back while
pressing her chest against you.
**[24:18] Yuiyui**
You bathed together.
**[24:20] Yuiyui**
As she napped innocently on the sofa,
**[24:22] Yuiyui**
you stared up her skirt while sitting
across from her and holding your knees.
**[24:26] Yuiyui**
You feed Chomusuke and say,
**[24:27] Yuiyui**
"This is what I want. Bring me more of this!
Then I'll feed you even more!"
**[24:31] Yuiyui**
while showing her some underwear...
**[24:33] Kazuma**
I am so sorry!
**[24:38] Hyoi**
But in spite of it all, she says
you're an important friend...
**[24:44] Hyoi**
And that even if you're a debt-ridden,
**[24:46] Hyoi**
perverted foul-mouth
without a lick of sense,
**[24:48] Hyoi**
you'd die without her, so she'll stay with you.
**[24:52] Hyoi**
Considering she said all that, I'm sure
there's more to you than it seems.
**[24:57] Kazuma**
*There are parts of that I'd argue against,*
**[25:00] Kazuma**
* but being called an important*
* friend does make me kind of happy.*
**[25:04] Yuiyui**
Since you're in the same party as her,
**[25:06] Yuiyui**
we'd love to help you out...
**[25:09] Kazuma**
No, it's all right! I'm on the verge
of making a fair bit of money.
**[25:12] Hyoi**
Oh? Exactly how much are we talking?
**[25:15] Kazuma**
I think it was 300 million eris.
**[25:17] Both**
300 million?!
**[25:19] Kazuma**
*Huh? Should I have not said that?*
**[25:22] Hyoi**
I've got a great idea, Kazuma-san!
You should spend the night here!
**[25:25] Hyoi**
As my daughter's comrade
and friend, it's only natural!
**[25:27] Hyoi**
I mean, as an adventurer, you don't
have a home of your own, right?!
**[25:30] Kazuma**
N-No, I actually have a mansion in Axel...
**[25:34] Both**
Mansion?!
**[25:43] Kazuma**
The second I brought up the
mansion and the 300 million,
**[25:45] Kazuma**
the reception got a lot warmer...
**[25:48] Kazuma**
But this place seems pretty safe,
**[25:51] Kazuma**
so once Megumin's rested up,
we should get out of here
**[25:54] Kazuma**
before we get caught up in any trouble.
**[26:06] Darkness**
How can you suggest such a thing?!
**[26:08] Darkness**
Don't you care what happens
to your daughter?!
**[26:10] Yuiyui**
It's perfectly fine.
She's old enough to get married,
**[26:14] Yuiyui**
and Kazuma-san is an adult
with good judgment.
**[26:16] Yuiyui**
Even if something were to happen...
**[26:18] Darkness**
What are you—
**[26:19] Yuiyui**
Sleep.
**[26:22] Kazuma**
*She actually did it!*
**[26:26] Kazuma**
*Is this...*
**[26:28] Yuiyui**
Oh, Kazuma-san. All done with the bath?
**[26:31] Yuiyui**
Everyone's already asleep,
**[26:33] Yuiyui**
so would you help me move
them into their rooms?
**[26:41] Yuiyui**
Well, enjoy yourselves!
**[26:52] Kazuma**
This is no time to be enchanted!
**[26:54] Kazuma**
I think those orcs might
have traumatized me...
**[26:57] Kazuma**
I'm gonna need some emotional care from
those nice succubi when I get back to Axel.
**[27:02] Yuiyui**
Lock.
**[27:07] Kazuma**
* I know I slipped up by talking*
* about the money that was coming in,*
**[27:11] Kazuma**
*but this lady is pretty intense...*
**[27:14] Kazuma**
*Hang on a sec.*
**[27:19] Kazuma**
*Aqua got hammered and fell asleep,*
**[27:21] Kazuma**
* and Hyoizaburo-san and Darkness*
* were both put to sleep by her mom!*
**[27:24] Kazuma**
* The door's been locked*
* from outside with magic!*
**[27:26] Kazuma**
*No one can get in here, and I can't get out!*
**[27:28] Kazuma**
*What a setup!*
**[27:31] Kazuma**
* There's only one futon. It's spring,*
* but nights are still cold.*
**[27:33] Kazuma**
* If I sleep without any cover,*
* I might get sick.*
**[27:36] Kazuma**
*And what if it develops into pneumonia?*
**[27:40] Kazuma**
* Given these factors, there should be no*
* problem with me sleeping next to Megumin.*
**[27:44] Kazuma**
* But if I made a move on her while*
* she was sleeping so peacefully,*
**[27:48] Kazuma**
* that'd rob me of any pretense*
* that I could use to deny*
**[27:50] Kazuma**
* when Darkness or Aqua call*
* me a creep or a scumbag!*
**[27:53] Kazuma**
*I'm a gentlemen! That's not like me!*
**[27:56] Kazuma**
* However, her parents have*
* signed off on this situation.*
**[27:59] Kazuma**
*I bet if Megumin sued me, I could win!*
**[28:02] Kazuma**
*Wait, could I?*
**[28:04] Kazuma**
* Damn it! I should have*
* studied up more on law!*
**[28:07] Kazuma**
*If I had known this would happen, I would've!*
**[28:12] Kazuma**
Wait, that's not it!
**[28:14] Kazuma**
What am I, stupid?!
**[28:15] Kazuma**
* This isn't about getting sued!*
* My entire perspective is off-base!*
**[28:18] Kazuma**
* No good. I think the situation*
* has me all mixed up.*
**[28:21] Kazuma**
*Calm down! Settle yourself, Satou Kazuma!*
**[28:23] Kazuma**
*Let's calm down and think this through.*
**[28:25] Kazuma**
* Spring or not, it's cold at night.*
* Too cold to think straight.*
**[28:28] Kazuma**
* First, let's crawl into*
* the futon and calm down!*
**[28:38] Kazuma**
*Wait, no! What a devious trap I've fallen for!*
**[28:41] Kazuma**
* Without realizing it, I've ended*
* up sleeping next to Megumin!*
**[28:44] Kazuma**
*Let's say I panic and jump out of the futon.*
**[28:46] Kazuma**
* Wouldn't that be the exact*
* moment that she'd wake up?!*
**[28:49] Kazuma**
* Exactly! The kind of situation where*
* I get punished no matter what I do!*
**[28:53] Kazuma**
* If that happens, even if I say, "I didn't do*
* anything!" or "It was your parents' idea!"*
**[28:56] Kazuma**
* I could have the best excuses in*
* the world, and no one would care!*
**[28:59] Kazuma**
*Oh, bitter injustice!*
**[29:01] Kazuma**
*It's a false accusation, that's what it is.*
**[29:03] Kazuma**
* And if that's going to be how things*
* turn out, no matter what I do...*
**[29:10] Kazuma**
* I may as well turn it around and remove*
* the "false" part of the equation.*
**[29:15] Kazuma**
* You can't put me in the same futon as a*
* beautiful girl and expect nothing to happen.*
**[29:21] Kazuma**
* More than anything, this situation*
* was cooked up by Megumin's mother.*
**[29:24] Kazuma**
*It's fine! I can win!*
**[29:26] Kazuma**
* In this kind of situation, I bet I could*
* even beat Sena in a court of law!*
**[29:38] Kazuma**
Good morning.
**[29:41] Megumin**
Oh... good morning.
**[29:44] Megumin**
Uh, how long was I asleep?
**[29:48] Kazuma**
About eight hours?
**[29:51] Megumin**
I see...
**[29:55] Megumin**
And... why am I sleeping
in the same futon as you?
**[30:00] Kazuma**
C'mon, don't make me spell it out.
**[30:01] Megumin**
Spell what out?!
**[30:04] Kazuma**
Hey, don't flip the cover up. It's cold.
**[30:07] Megumin**
I just woke up in my old room next
to you, Kazuma! What happened?!
**[30:11] Kazuma**
Come on, you really think
I'd try to pull something?
**[30:15] Kazuma**
I haven't up until now, have I?
**[30:18] Megumin**
That's a good point. Sorry.
**[30:20] Megumin**
I think I was a bit confused,
since I just woke up...
**[30:25] Megumin**
You're not the kind of person who would
take advantage of a situation like this.
**[30:29] Kazuma**
Of course not!
**[30:31] Kazuma**
I'll have you know your mom locked
the door and trapped me in here!
**[30:35] Megumin**
She did?! Honestly...
**[30:37] Kazuma**
That being the case, saddle up!
**[30:39] Kazuma**
It's cold, so into the futon with you!
**[30:41] Kazuma**
It's fine! I won't do! A thing!
**[30:44] Megumin**
You won't?
**[30:46] Megumin**
You really won't do... anything?
**[30:49] Megumin**
Even though we're all alone...
**[30:52] Kazuma**
*Say what?*
**[30:53] Kazuma**
* I-Is she saying I should try something?*
* Is this really my popular phase?!*
**[30:58] Kazuma**
Fool! I'm obviously gonna try
something if we're all alone!
**[31:02] Kazuma**
I've even got your parents' approval!
**[31:05] Megumin**
You idiot! I suspected as much!
**[31:08] Megumin**
I'm going to spend the
night at Yunyun's house!
**[31:10] Kazuma**
Damn you! You tricked me!
**[31:13] Megumin**
Death to perverts!
**[31:15] Megumin**
Die, die, die, die, die!
**[31:21] Aqua**
Megumin, Megumin!
**[31:23] Aqua**
Could you show us the sights around here?
**[31:25] Megumin**
That's a good idea.
**[31:27] Megumin**
Why don't we have a nice, leisurely day,
and then stay one more night?
**[31:30] Aqua**
Yay!
**[31:32] Aqua**
I'm going to have Megumin show me around.
**[31:34] Aqua**
What are you going to do, Kreeperma-san?
**[31:36] Kazuma**
Good question. Maybe I'll join...
**[31:38] Kazuma**
Wait. What did you just call me?
**[31:41] Aqua**
Did I say something strange?
**[31:43] Kazuma**
No... Maybe I imagined it?
**[31:47] Kazuma**
Well, whatever. What about you, Darkness?
**[31:49] Darkness**
There's a place I'd like to visit.
**[31:52] Darkness**
You and the others should enjoy
your sightseeing, Kazutrash.
**[31:55] Kazuma**
Okay, sounds— Wait, what did you just say?
**[31:58] Megumin**
So I'll be showing Aqua
and Kursedma around, then?
**[32:01] Megumin**
There are lots of things to see in town—
**[32:02] Kazuma**
Hang on a second!
**[32:04] Aqua**
Is something wrong, Kazuma-san-who-tried-to-
mess-with-Megumin-while-she-was-sleeping?
**[32:15] Kazuma**
I'm sorry.
**[32:47] Megumin**
This is the mysterious facility where the
Crimson Demons' natural enemy is sealed away.
**[32:51] Kazuma**
What do you mean, mysterious facility?
**[32:53] Megumin**
Just what I said. It's a mysterious facility.
**[32:55] Megumin**
No one knows what else is inside,
who built it, or for what reason.
**[33:01] Aqua**
Hey, Megumin.
**[33:02] Aqua**
Are there any other places with
cool things hidden inside?
**[33:05] Megumin**
Well, there was a tomb where
an evil god was sealed away,
**[33:08] Megumin**
and a piece of land where a
nameless goddess was sealed away,
**[33:11] Megumin**
but eventually, they ended up being released.
**[33:14] Kazuma**
Are you guys bad at keeping
things sealed or what?!
**[33:19] Cheekera**
Well, if it isn't Megumin!
You're back in town?
**[33:23] Cheekera**
Are these folks from out of town?
**[33:29] Kazuma**
*Does he have... problems with outsiders?*
**[33:36] Cheekera**
I am called Cheekera! Arch wizard
and wielder of advanced magic!
**[33:41] Cheekera**
And owner of the foremost clothing
store among the Crimson Demons!
**[33:46] Cheekera**
Welcome, folks! It's been a while
since I've had outsiders in the shop.
**[33:51] Kazuma**
Having the foremost store
is pretty impressive!
**[33:53] Cheekera**
Well, this is also the only
clothing store in the village.
**[33:57] Kazuma**
Are you mocking us?!
**[33:59] Megumin**
I was actually hoping to
replace my current robe.
**[34:02] Megumin**
Do you have another just like this?
**[34:07] Cheekera**
All of them?
**[34:09] Cheekera**
Wow, our little Megumin's gone all bourgeois!
**[34:12] Megumin**
I'm honestly surprised the village
hasn't heard of my exploits yet!
**[34:17] Megumin**
And since the robes are
what I wear into action,
**[34:19] Megumin**
it can't hurt to have a few
more in my wardrobe.
**[34:21] Megumin**
That being said, future millionaire
Kazuma, lend me some money.
**[34:26] Kazuma**
You...
**[34:27] Kazuma**
I mean, fine, but...
**[34:28] Cheekera**
Thank you very much!
**[34:37] Kazuma**
Hey...
**[34:39] Megumin**
What is it?
**[34:40] Kazuma**
Isn't this...
**[34:42] Kazuma**
I mean, what the hell?
You're hanging clothes from that?
**[34:46] Cheekera**
Oh, sir, do you recognize it?
**[34:49] Cheekera**
This is the clothes-drying pole that's been
passed down through my family for ages.
**[34:54] Cheekera**
It never rusts, so it's super handy.
**[34:58] Aqua**
That's pretty clearly a rifle.
**[35:01] Kazuma**
That's what I thought.
**[35:03] Kazuma**
What is up with this village?
**[35:11] Megumin**
Kazuma! Aqua!
**[35:12] Megumin**
Now that you know the charms
of the Crimson Demon Village,
**[35:14] Megumin**
allow me to show you even finer splendor!
**[35:21] Megumin**
Welcome...
**[35:23] Megumin**
to our magic academy, the Red Prison!
**[35:26] Yunyun**
W-Welcome...
**[35:28] Kazuma**
What're you doing here, Yunyun?
**[35:30] Megumin**
When I stayed over at her house last night,
the friendless wonder seemed lonely,
**[35:33] Megumin**
so I invited her to come along.
**[35:35] Yunyun**
I-I-I never said I was lonely!
**[35:37] Megumin**
You even dug out your old uniform.
Why try and hide it?
**[35:43] Aqua**
So this is your uniform? It's cute!
**[35:46] Megumin**
Isn't it, though?!
**[35:48] Megumin**
It's only natural that I get changed
**[35:50] Megumin**
to show you around our
distinguished magical academy!
**[35:53] Kazuma**
I bet you just wanted to wear it
because you felt nostalgic.
**[35:56] Aqua**
Kazuma always gets prickly when
the subject of school comes up.
**[35:59] Aqua**
He's probably still bitter
about not fitting in.
**[36:02] Kazuma**
Hey, cut it out! That's a
confidentiality violation!
**[36:08] Arue**
I am called Arue...
**[36:10] Arue**
The most voluptuous among the
Crimson Demons, and a future author!
**[36:15] Funifura**
I am called Funifura!
**[36:18] Funifura**
The foremost among Crimson Demons
who love their brothers,
**[36:20] Funifura**
known for her brother complex!
**[36:22] Dodonko**
I am called Dodonko!
**[36:24] Dodonko**
Foremost among the Crimson Demons at...
**[36:27] Dodonko**
At... what was it again?
**[36:31] Kazuma**
You've got a brother complex, huh?
**[36:32] Dodonko**
I-I just don't have a cool nickname yet!
**[36:37] Megumin**
Arue... Dodonko, Funikura.
**[36:40] Funifura**
It's Funifura! You did that on purpose!
You totally did, didn't you?!
**[36:44] Funifura**
We heard you were back in town.
**[36:47] Aqua**
Who're they?
**[36:48] Megumin**
Classmates from when we
attended the magic academy.
**[36:51] Arue**
Welcome home. I'm glad to
see you made it back safely.
**[36:54] Megumin**
People might believe the things you write,
**[36:56] Megumin**
so please don't send "letters"
like that anymore.
**[36:58] Dodonko**
And you people are the members
of Yunyun's party?
**[37:02] Funifura**
I'm surprised you actually exist!
**[37:04] Funifura**
Yunyun's party, I mean.
**[37:06] Yunyun**
L-Let me introduce you!
**[37:08] Yunyun**
Th-This guy is a rookie adventurer,
**[37:11] Yunyun**
and the girl is an arch priest!
**[37:13] Yunyun**
There's also a very durable lady
who's not with us at the moment!
**[37:17] Yunyun**
And Megumin was sad on her own,
**[37:19] Yunyun**
so we recently invited her to join us!
**[37:23] Arue**
That sounds like a lovely party.
**[37:25] Aqua**
Yunyun's not actually a member of
the party, but she helps us out a lot,
**[37:29] Aqua**
despite not being a member!
**[37:30] Yunyun**
Uh...
**[37:31] Megumin**
Yes, in spite of her not being a member.
**[37:34] Both**
We figured.
**[37:35] Aqua**
I've given Yunyun the nickname
"frog slayer" in my heart.
**[37:39] Kazuma**
What are you talking about?
**[37:41] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Light of Saber!
**[37:44] Aqua**
Come on, remember how she
took out those Giant Toads
**[37:46] Aqua**
with that sparkly sword-like spell?
**[37:50] Dodonko**
Isn't that...
**[37:52] Arue**
That's an actual advanced spell.
**[37:55] Funifura**
Yunyun, I thought you could
only do intermediate magic!
**[38:00] Funifura**
She picked it up at an awkward time,
**[38:04] Funifura**
so she wasn't able to learn
advanced magic before graduation.
**[38:07] Yunyun**
C-Come on, it's not like I needed to know it.
**[38:18] Aqua**
What's wrong, Kazuma? Are you still torn
up about not having friends in school?
**[38:22] Kazuma**
That's not it!
**[38:24] Kazuma**
I was just wondering about Yunyun.
**[38:27] Megumin**
You mean what they said earlier?
**[38:29] Kazuma**
I thought Crimson Demons were a bunch of
OP weirdos who all used advanced magic.
**[38:37] Megumin**
Well...
**[38:40] Megumin**
When I was a student, in order
to learn Explosion magic,
**[38:44] Megumin**
I was storing up my skill points.
**[38:47] Megumin**
I endured it day after day,
**[38:49] Megumin**
to make sure I could someday
learn Explosion magic.
**[38:54] Megumin**
But one day...
**[38:56] (Flashback) Kokemkko**
Give me my food back!
**[38:59] (Flashback) Megumin**
Komekko!
**[39:07] Megumin**
To save Komekko when she
was attacked by monsters,
**[39:09] Megumin**
Yunyun used her own points in
order to learn intermediate magic,
**[39:14] Megumin**
while I was hesitating...
**[39:19] Kazuma**
You mean she covered for you
so you could learn Explosion magic?
**[39:27] Megumin**
Not that I asked her to, but yes.
**[39:31] Aqua**
Well, she's a more established
mage than you are now,
**[39:35] Aqua**
so it worked out all right!
**[39:36] Kazuma**
True enough.
**[39:37] Megumin**
How dare you?!
***SIGN*** The Devil King's forces have appeared!!
***SIGN*** Emergency Quest
**[39:45] Sylvia**
What is it with this woman?!
What is she trying to do?!
**[39:48] Goblin S1**
Lady Sylvia! There's no telling
what she's after! Please, stand back!
**[39:53] Boglin**
She's a real freak! Her attacks are
worthless, but she's sturdy as they come!
**[39:57] Darkness**
As long as there is light in my eyes,
you will not pass!
**[40:01] Kazuma**
Darkness! Good job hanging in there!
**[40:03] Kazuma**
We brought help from the village!
**[40:05] Darkness**
K-Kazuma? You're already here?
**[40:08] Darkness**
I was sad that only female orcs are left,
so I came here to see what I could find,
**[40:11] Darkness**
and even the Devil King's general is a woman!
**[40:14] Darkness**
What is wrong with this journey?!
**[40:16] Kazuma**
Could you shut up for a second?!
**[40:17] Kazuma**
You're ruining that impressive performance!
**[40:20] Sylvia**
I see. Buying time until
your allies arrived, then?
**[40:24] Sylvia**
From the way you endured those attacks,
you must be a fairly high-level crusader.
**[40:30] Sylvia**
Was not being able to land
any attacks part of your act?
**[40:33] Darkness**
I-I suppose there's no point
in maintaining the facade...
**[40:37] Darkness**
Glance...
**[40:39] Kazuma**
Look, you're Sylvia, right?
**[40:41] Kazuma**
That crusader is an accomplished warrior
who fought the Devil King's general, Vanir!
**[40:45] Sylvia**
Vanir?!
**[40:47] Sylvia**
I heard he never returned
from the town of Axel...
**[40:50] Sylvia**
Was that because of you people?
**[40:52] Kazuma**
Yeah! Megumin here finished him off.
**[40:55] Goblin**
Vanir-sama is dead?!
**[40:57] Crimson Demons**
That's awesome!
**[40:59] Kazuma**
And that's not all!
**[41:00] Kazuma**
The Dullahan, Verdia,
and Hans the Deadly Poison...
**[41:03] Kazuma**
And even the mobile fortress, Destroyer.
**[41:07] Kazuma**
The four of us took them all down.
**[41:09] Sylvia**
Verdia and Hans, too?!
**[41:12] Sylvia**
But when I think about how
we lost contact with Hans
**[41:15] Sylvia**
after he infiltrated Arcanretia,
it seems plausible.
**[41:18] Sylvia**
I take it you're the leader?
Why don't you tell me your name?
**[41:24] Kazuma**
M-My name?
**[41:27] Kazuma**
It's Mitsurugi.
**[41:30] Kazuma**
Mitsurugi Kyouya. Remember it.
**[41:33] Megumin**
Someone just chickened out.
**[41:36] Aqua**
He must've been feeling cocky with all
these Crimson Demons backing him up.
**[41:40] Sylvia**
So you're Mitsurugi of the Cursed Sword...
**[41:43] Sylvia**
I didn't expect to encounter
such a powerful party.
**[41:47] Kazuma**
Taking you down right here with
the Crimson Demons' help
**[41:50] Kazuma**
wouldn't be much of an accomplishment.
**[41:52] Sylvia**
I appreciate that, Mitsurugi.
**[41:55] Sylvia**
Let's meet again. When we do,
we'll see who comes out on top.
**[41:58] Sylvia**
Retreat!
**[42:01] Bukkorori**
Don't let them escape! Lightning Strike!
**[42:03] CD N**
Light of Saber!
**[42:05] CD C**
Time to test my magic on you all!
**[42:12] Kazuma**
I should buy Mitsurugi some
bubbly next time I see him.
**[42:38] Kazuma**
Good morning.
**[42:39] Kazuma**
Did you get a good night's rest?
**[42:42] Kazuma**
Good... morn...ing.
**[42:45] Megumin**
Did you finally cross the line?!
**[42:48] Megumin**
You beast! Kazuma, you beast!
**[42:50] Kazuma**
Dummy.
**[42:52] Kazuma**
I was just holding your
hand because it's cold.
**[42:54] Megumin**
R-Really?
**[42:58] Megumin**
I suppose I got the wrong idea.
**[43:01] Megumin**
I'm sorry.
**[43:02] Kazuma**
H-Hey, it's fine.
**[43:06] Kazuma**
But it's about time you
did seriously thank me.
**[43:10] Kazuma**
I'm always cleaning up
after you guys, after all.
**[43:14] Megumin**
Thanking you?
**[43:17] Megumin**
You've got a point.
**[43:22] Megumin**
Back then, you accepted an aimless wizard
**[43:26] Megumin**
who could only cast
Explosion magic. Thank you.
**[43:30] Megumin**
You always carry me home on your back
**[43:32] Megumin**
when I can't move after
casting it. Thank you.
**[43:36] Megumin**
I always cause so much trouble,
**[43:38] Megumin**
but you keep me in the party. Thank you.
**[43:44] Megumin**
I was just thanking you.
**[43:46] Megumin**
Why are you embarrassed when
you're the one who demanded it?
**[43:50] Kazuma**
O-Oh...
**[43:51] Kazuma**
Well, in spite of it all,
you guys do help out a lot.
**[43:57] Kazuma**
To put it in your terms...
**[43:59] Kazuma**
I am called Satou Kazuma!
**[44:01] Kazuma**
Axel's weakest adventurer,
and foremost at getting into trouble!
**[44:07] Kazuma**
He who will obtain the wealth to spend
his days having fun with the rest of you!
**[44:14] Kazuma**
And I'm looking forward to it.
**[44:19] Megumin**
So am I. Here's to a bright future.
**[44:24] Megumin**
I-It really is cold today.
**[44:27] Megumin**
As if we're trapped... in... ice...
**[44:33] Megumin**
Kazuma, care to explain what this is?
**[44:36] Kazuma**
I think maybe there was a freak blizzard
**[44:38] Kazuma**
that froze the window
shut before blowing away.
**[44:41] Megumin**
Let me out! Let me out, please!
**[44:44] Megumin**
Open! Open! Open up, now!
**[44:46] Megumin**
Mom! Kazuma froze the window shut!
**[44:49] Kazuma**
Look, I'm sorry, and I'm
not gonna do anything!
**[44:52] Kazuma**
It's cold, so let's go to bed.
**[44:53] Megumin**
I want my gratitude back!
**[44:56] Kazuma**
Look, I'm sorry. My bad.
**[45:05] Megumin**
I'm really regretting all
those nice things I said.
**[45:09] Kazuma**
*And after she was the one who held my hand.*
**[45:12] Kazuma**
*Feels like we're an old couple in a cold stretch.*
**[45:15] Kazuma**
Freeze...
**[45:17] Megumin**
Did you just use ice magic again?!
**[45:19] Megumin**
Do you want me to cling to you that badly?!
**[45:25] Kazuma**
H-Hey! If you start clinging
to me like that...
**[45:30] Megumin**
I can see why Darkness says that
**[45:32] Megumin**
every time you've had a chance
to do something with her,
**[45:34] Megumin**
you laugh it off and never do anything.
**[45:37] Megumin**
You really are a wimp.
**[45:39] Kazuma**
*Huh?*
**[45:41] Kazuma**
*Is this... Does Megumin...*
**[45:43] Kazuma**
*Is she open to the idea?!*
**[45:46] Kazuma**
*This really is my popular phase!*
**[45:49] Annoucnement**
* The Devil King Army is attacking!*
* The Devil King Army is attacking!*
**[45:51] Annoucnement**
*They've already breached the village!*
**[45:54] Kazuma**
Yeah, that's what I figured.
**[46:04] Kazuma**
How dare you interrupt just
when it was getting good?!
**[46:05] Kazuma**
What the hell, man?!
**[46:06] Kazuma**
You ever think about the trouble
you cause other people, dumbass?!
**[46:09] Kazuma**
You want an ass whooping?!
**[46:11] Sylvia**
I'm sorry!
**[46:13] Sylvia**
Wait, no!
**[46:14] Sylvia**
I didn't think I'd run into you out here.
**[46:19] Sylvia**
Oh, dear!
**[46:20] Sylvia**
Did I interrupt something?
**[46:23] Megumin**
No!
**[46:23] Kazuma**
Hell yeah, you did!
**[46:24] Aqua**
Do you know how late it is?
Could you quiet down?
**[46:27] Kazuma**
Aqua! One of the Devil King's
generals is out here!
**[46:29] Kazuma**
Get Megumin's parents!
**[46:31] Aqua**
Okay!
**[46:32] Kazuma**
You better not expect any
mercy just because you're hot!
**[46:35] Kazuma**
In the name of true gender equality,
**[46:36] Kazuma**
I will dropkick any rotten
woman who deserves it!
**[46:43] Sylvia**
Are you actually the famous Mitsurugi?
**[46:46] Sylvia**
You mean to tell me this little
thing is the Cursed Sword Gram?
**[46:49] Megumin**
It's Chunchunmaru.
**[46:52] Megumin**
I said that sword's name is Chunchunmaru.
**[46:54] Megumin**
Please don't compare it to some cursed
sword nobody's heard of, like Gram!
**[47:04] Sylvia**
You're not Mitsurugi, are you?
**[47:06] Kazuma**
My name is Satou Kazuma!
**[47:08] Kazuma**
I thought if you people knew my name,
you'd put a bounty on my head or something!
**[47:13] Sylvia**
I think I like you!
**[47:15] Aqua**
Kazuma!
**[47:16] Darkness**
You! The people of this house have left
to gather the other Crimson Demons!
**[47:20] Darkness**
Surrender now!
**[47:25] Sylvia**
Settle down, now.
**[47:27] Kazuma**
*Thank you very—*
**[47:29] Kazuma**
*Wait, no, that's wrong! This is a trap.*
**[47:30] Kazuma**
* I shouldn't be happy just because*
* sh'es exposing skin, busty,*
**[47:32] Kazuma**
*and a statuesque beauty in spite of
her huge frame* thank you very much*!*
**[47:36] Megumin**
I'll get you out of there, Kazuma!
**[47:37] Darkness**
You'll blow Kazuma away, too,
if you use Explosion magic!
**[47:40] Sylvia**
I'm taking him as a hostage.
**[47:43] Darkness**
Wait! If you need a hostage, take me!
**[47:46] Sylvia**
You're a naughty one, aren't you?
**[47:48] Kazuma**
*What has been up with me lately?*
**[47:51] Kazuma**
* It starts with Yunyun saying*
* she wants to have my baby,*
**[47:54] Kazuma**
*then the orcs, Megumin, and now Sylvia...*
**[47:56] Kazuma**
*Even if the orcs weren't really a positive.*
**[47:58] Kazuma**
* But this is the kind of luck where*
* I'd expect some kind of backlash.*
**[48:00] Kazuma**
*Have I actually entered a popular phase?*
**[48:02] Kazuma**
* Or has my high luck stat, my only*
* saving grace, kicked into overdrive?*
**[48:07] Sylvia**
Now, sweetie, stop breathing so heavily...
**[48:11] Sylvia**
You're heating me up.
**[48:13] Aqua**
Sacred Exorcism!
**[48:18] Sylvia**
A sneak attack...
**[48:20] Sylvia**
But I've got bad news.
**[48:21] Sylvia**
I'm not a pure demon,
so it's not going to kill me.
**[48:26] Sylvia**
I am called Sylvia!
**[48:28] Sylvia**
I am the chief of the Enhanced
Monster Development Bureau,
**[48:30] Sylvia**
she who has synthesized
and modified her own body!
**[48:34] Sylvia**
Yes, Sylvia, the Growth Chimera!
**[48:38] Sylvia**
And I'm taking this boy with me!
**[48:40] Sylvia**
Let's become one again.
**[48:43] Megumin**
Kazuma!
**[48:53] Megumin**
Did... Did he just let himself be taken?
**[48:56] Kazuma**
Of course not.
**[48:57] Kazuma**
* This is strange. It's such a perfect fit,*
* and I feel so safe.*
**[49:00] Kazuma**
* Like I've finally found the sanctuary*
* I've been searching for.*
**[49:04] Darkness**
Hold on, Kazuma! I'll get you out of there!
**[49:06] Kazuma**
I'd rather you didn't.
**[49:09] Kazuma**
I said I'd rather you didn't.
**[49:11] Kazuma**
You guys have been kind of taking
me for granted lately, haven't you?
**[49:15] Kazuma**
See, Sylvia-san here...
She actually appreciates me.
**[49:19] Kazuma**
It's enough to make me...
defect to the Devil King's army.
**[49:23] Kazuma**
So apologize!
**[49:24] Kazuma**
It's about time I got an apology,
since I always try so hard for you all!
**[49:27] Darkness**
E-Enough with the jokes, Kazuma...
**[49:30] Darkness**
There's a time and place for these things.
**[49:32] Darkness**
T-True enough, you have
accomplished some great feats.
**[49:36] Darkness**
When we get back to Axel, I'll talk to
my father about giving you a medal...
**[49:39] Kazuma**
I want sincerity!
**[49:40] Kazuma**
Stop trying to buy me off with stuff!
I want genuine contrition!
**[49:43] Kazuma**
Just look at what's happening here.
**[49:45] Kazuma**
Miss Sylvia of the Devil King's army is
giving me the billowy pillowy treatment!
**[49:49] Kazuma**
Darkness! What is your greatest strength?
Tell me! Go on, spit it out!
**[49:54] Darkness**
M-My defensive strength?
**[49:56] Kazuma**
Obviously not!
**[49:58] Kazuma**
Your only strength is your
needlessy seductive body
**[50:00] Kazuma**
that brings men to their knees!
**[50:02] Kazuma**
How can you be so oblivious?!
**[50:04] Darkness**
I-I don't seduce anybody!
**[50:06] Kazuma**
You clearly do!
**[50:08] Kazuma**
Your body is luscious,
and for no good reason!
**[50:09] Kazuma**
What you don't realize is that my high
luck stat is at its apex tonight!
**[50:13] Kazuma**
I've never been a bigger hit with the chicks!
**[50:15] Kazuma**
Now apologize!
**[50:17] Kazuma**
Give me a proper apology so I
don't waltz off with Sylvia-san,
**[50:20] Kazuma**
thanks to my awesome popular phase!
**[50:22] Sylvai**
You are just delightful.
**[50:24] Sylvai**
But don't be too harsh on the ladies, okay?
**[50:27] Sylvai**
I need to teach you how to
understand women a bit better.
**[50:32] Darkness**
As if a demonic beast could
understand how human women feel...
**[50:36] Sylvia**
Well, of course I can understand
how they feel. Men *and* women.
**[50:42] Kazuma**
*Just what I'd expect from a demonic beauty.*
**[50:44] Kazuma**
* She's got bewitching charisma that*
* lets her understand men and women!*
**[50:49] Sylvia**
After all, I'm partially a man myself.
**[50:56] Kazuma**
Say that again?
**[50:57] Sylvia**
Oh, you didn't hear me?
I'm a chimera, after all.
**[51:01] Sylvia**
Even these boobs you're so fond of
were something I added to my body.
**[51:05] Megumin**
K-Kazuma... s-stay calm...
**[51:09] Megumin**
I-It's fine! Don't panic! Don't panic.
**[51:13] Sylvia**
You really are a fine man, though.
**[51:16] Sylvia**
Just holding you like this has my breasts
and lower body feeling all tingly!
**[51:20] Kazuma**
Sylvia-san! Sylvia-san!
**[51:22] Kazuma**
Why do I feel something
pressing into my butt?
**[51:27] Sylvia**
Because something is!
**[51:29] Sylvia**
*Something is! Something is! Something is!*
**[51:34] Kazuma**
No!
***SIGN*** Quest Failed
***SIGN*** Orc (♀)
***SIGN*** Kazuma was psychologically scarred
***SIGN*** Kazuma was psychologically scarred
***SIGN*** Sylvia (♂)
**[51:42] Kazuma**
Cut it out! Get your dick
off of me! You wanna die?!
**[51:45] Sylvia**
Settle down!
**[51:46] Sylvia**
You don't have to worry.
I'm not going to try anything.
**[51:50] Sylvia**
I managed to shake the others off
my tail, so you're free to go.
**[51:56] Kazuma**
Where are we?
**[51:57] Sylvia**
This is the Crimson Demon Village's
underground storage facility.
**[52:00] Sylvia**
My objective is to find the ancient
magic weapon that's hidden here.
**[52:05] Kazuma**
A magic weapon?
**[52:08] Sylvia**
The Mage Killer.
**[52:12] Sylvia**
It can neutralize any magic...
**[52:14] Sylvia**
A perfect counter to the Crimson Demons.
**[52:18] Kazuma**
Something like that is down here?
**[52:19] Sylvia**
I've finally gotten this close.
**[52:23] Sylvia**
The barrier breaker isn't working?
**[52:25] Sylvia**
What exactly is this?
It's not sealed with magic?
**[52:29] Kazuma**
Are those... controller inputs?
**[52:31] Sylvia**
You can read that ancient text?!
**[52:33] Kazuma**
Nah, I think they just used a famous
cheat code as the password for the—
**[52:38] Sylvia**
You're even better than I'd hoped.
**[52:41] Kazuma**
I'm still an adventurer, y'know!
**[52:43] Kazuma**
Don't expect me to give in that easily!
**[52:46] Sylvia**
There's more to getting someone to talk
than threats and violence, you know.
**[52:51] Sylvia**
You'll find my technique
is on par with a succubus.
**[52:53] Sylvia**
I wonder how much ecstasy you'll be able to—
**[52:55] Kazuma**
Up, up, down, down, left, right,
left, right! There you go!
**[53:04] Sylvia**
Do the things you do not bother you?
**[53:08] Sylvia**
Not that it matters. Now the weapon is mine.
**[53:11] Kazuma**
*Crap.*
**[53:13] Kazuma**
*I got so anxious, I put the password in.*
**[53:16] Kazuma**
*Still...*
**[53:18] Sylvia**
It's so dark. I can't see a thing.
**[53:22] Kazuma**
* I think she might be taking me too lightly*
* just because I don't have a weapon.*
**[53:27] Sylvia**
Hey, do you have anything
I can use for light?
**[53:33] Sylvia**
Hey! What do you think you're—
**[53:34] Kazuma**
Up, up, down, down, left, right,
left, right, and away you go!
**[53:37] Sylvia**
Hey, you, stop that! Hold it right there!
**[53:39] Sylvia**
Wait, damn it!
**[53:41] Kazuma**
KONOSUBA...
**[53:43] Megumin**
Kazuma! Are you all right?
**[53:44] Darkness**
Where's Sylvia?
**[53:46] Kazuma**
I managed to trap Sylvia in here
with a bit of skillful deceit.
***SIGN*** Hey, damn it!
***SIGN*** Open this door right now!
You hear me?!
**[53:51] Kazuma**
If we leave her in there for a month
or so, she's bound to quiet down.
***SIGN*** (Heavy breathing)
***SIGN*** Ah! <3
**[53:55] Darkness**
A Devil King general...
killed by starvation?
***SIGN*** It hurts!
***SIGN*** Ow, ow, ow!
***SIGN*** Oh!
**[53:58] Bukkorori**
Well done, outsider!
***SIGN*** My breasts!
***SIGN*** I think my boobies
are stuck in the door!
**[53:59] Bukkorori**
You managed to capture Sylvia,
after she evaded us every time!
***SIGN*** Ah!
***SIGN*** I can't move!
***SIGN*** Come on, Satou Kazuma.
**[54:05] Aqua**
Isn't there some kind of scary
weapon sealed in this place?
***SIGN*** Won't you please open the door?
**[54:09] Bukkorori**
Even we couldn't figure out
how to use it. It'll be fine.
***SIGN*** Hahh! Hahh!
***SIGN*** Aw, come on!
***SIGN*** Say something, damn it!
**[54:12] Soketto**
If Sylvia is able to activate the weapon,
***SIGN*** At least respond, you piece of crap!
**[54:15] Soketto**
I'll run a lap around the village
while doing a handstand!
***SIGN*** Because if you're not gonna poke at me,
**[54:17] Kazuma**
Whoa, don't set flags!
***SIGN*** I'm gonna poke you hard, damn it!
**[54:19] Aqua**
Come on, what are you worried about, Kazuma?
***SIGN*** You hear me?!
**[54:22] Aqua**
You defeated one of
the Devil King's generals!
***SIGN*** I am going
***SIGN*** to poke you!
**[54:24] Aqua**
You basically did it by yourself this time,
**[54:27] Aqua**
but since we're a party,
we split the reward, right?
**[54:30] Aqua**
What should I buy when we get back to Axel?
**[54:34] Kazuma**
Why do you do this every damn time?!
We need to get out of here, fast!
**[54:51] Sylvia**
Did you think I was just going
to take the weapon with me?
**[54:55] Sylvia**
This is my power.
**[54:57] Sylvia**
I can assimilate anything into
my body, weapons or otherwise!
**[55:02] Sylvia**
My name is Sylvia!
**[55:04] Sylvia**
Sylvia the Growth Chimera,
who has obtained ultimate power!
**[55:13] Megumin**
K-K-Kazuma, this is bad!
**[55:15] Megumin**
That's the Mage Killer!
**[55:16] Megumin**
Let's run! We need to get out of here, fast!
**[55:19] Soketto**
Abandon the village! It's doomed!
**[55:25] Sylvia**
We've had our ups and downs,
but I have this power because of you.
**[55:30] Sylvia**
So I'll spare you.
**[55:34] Sylvia**
You can stand there and watch as
I wipe this village off the map!
**[55:56] Crimson Demon M**
Hey, look!
**[55:57] Crimson Demon R**
Isn't that the legendary Mage Killer?!
**[56:00] Sylvia**
Time for some well-deserved payback!
**[56:11] S. Goblin 1**
It's Sylvia-sama!
**[56:13] S. Goblin 2**
Sylvia-sama managed to get
a hold of the Mage Killer!
**[56:16] Goblins**
Sylvia! Sylvia!
**[56:24] Chief**
I never thought the seal would be broken...
**[56:27] Kazuma**
Village Chief!
**[56:29] Chief**
Oh, our visitors.
**[56:30] Chief**
It's a shame this happened
while you were here.
**[56:32] Kazuma**
I-It's okay...
**[56:34] Chief**
* I'm so sorry. It was me*
* who let that thing out!*
**[56:38] Arue**
The village... is burning.
**[56:42] Kazuma**
I-Is there seriously nothing we can do?
**[56:45] Arue**
The Mage Killer does have...
**[56:47] Arue**
a secret countermeasure.
**[56:51] Chief**
There are ruins with an inscription that
no one has been able to decipher...
**[56:55] Kazuma**
There are?!
**[56:56] Kazuma**
O-Okay, let's head there right now!
**[57:03] Megumin**
What did she hit?!
**[57:04] Kazuma**
That was near your house!
**[57:06] Megumin**
Komekko's there!
**[57:07] Darkness**
Megumin, take Kazuma and
the others to those ruins!
**[57:11] Darkness**
Don't worry. I'll protect your family.
**[57:15] Darkness**
That's a knight's duty, right?
**[57:19] Megumin**
Please, save Komekko.
**[57:20] Kazuma**
Okay, this is do-or-die. Let's go!
**[57:23] Chief**
"Do-or-die," eh?
**[57:25] Chief**
For outsiders, you definitely
understand our culture!
**[57:29] Arue**
Not bad. If anything,
things like this are our style!
**[57:32] Pucchin**
All right, why don't we show her what
we can do to defend the village?
**[57:38] CDs**
Yeah!
**[57:40] Kazuma**
* I think this disaster might be the kind*
* of thing they look forward to...*
**[57:44] Aqua**
Hey, sorry to interrupt during the big
speeches, but I don't like any of this.
**[57:48] Aqua**
My job is providing support
from a safe position.
**[57:53] Kazuma**
Stop whining and move!
**[57:54] Kazunma**
You're in this party, too!
**[57:56] Aqua**
No!
**[57:57] Multi**
KONOSUBA!
**[58:00] Wiz**
Here we are, Vanir-san.
**[58:03] Wiz**
I'm sure the craftsman I know can help you!
**[58:06] Vanir**
That confidence only makes me anxious,
considering it's coming from you.
**[58:11] Wiz**
It'll be fine!
**[58:12] Wiz**
He's very skill—
**[58:20] Kazuma**
This is screwed up.
**[58:21] Megumin**
Kazuma, this way!
**[58:25] Kazuma**
Hey...
**[58:26] Kazuma**
This is Japanese!
**[58:28] Megumin**
Japa... what?
**[58:31] Kazuma**
Uh, don't worry about it.
**[58:33] Aqua**
"I now leave this record
of what has transpired.
**[58:37] Aqua**
One day, the king trampled
into my paradise
**[58:41] Aqua**
demanding a weapon that
could defeat the Devil King."
**[58:44] (Flashback) Prof**
But nothing can be gained from war...
**[58:49] Prof**
* I tried to brush it off with that,*
* but a lady researcher slapped me.*
**[58:53] Prof**
* I kinda think I already contributed*
* enough to this country*
**[58:57] Prof**
* using the cheat ability I got*
* when I came to this world!*
**[59:00] Prof**
*I'm all out of ideas!*
**[59:05] Prof**
* I managed to come up with a weapon*
* to deal with the Devil King.*
**[59:07] Prof**
* I say that, but they're just*
* humans that I modified...*
**[59:11] (Flashback) Crimson Demons**
Master, please give us our new names.
**[59:14] Prof**
*Master who?*
**[59:15] Prof**
*Boy, they're really acting the part.*
**[59:17] Prof**
* Between asking for red eyes and wanting*
* identifying numbers on each of their bodies...*
**[59:22] Prof**
*Is everyone in this country a nutcase?*
**[59:25] Prof**
* I randomly came up with*
* the name "Crimson Demons,"*
**[59:27] Prof**
*and they absolutely loved it for some reason!*
**[59:30] Megumin**
Kazuma, what are you doing?!
**[59:32] Megumin**
Take your hands off my ears!
**[59:34] Prof**
* The Crimson Demons found out about the*
* Mage Killer that I made a prototype of,*
**[59:39] Prof**
*and they called it "our natural enemy!"*
**[59:42] (Flashback) Crimson Demon**
Fight sorcerer technology
with sorcerer technology.
**[59:44] (Flashback) Crimson Demon**
We desire a deterrent to
prevent it from running amok.
**[59:48] Prof**
* I honestly don't hate their whole*
* "pretentious but nerdy" aesthetic.*
**[59:58] Prof**
* For something I threw together, this*
* deterrent turned out pretty awesome!*
**[1:00:01] Prof**
* It's only about as big*
* as a clothes-drying pole,*
**[1:00:04] Prof**
* but it's got enough firepower*
* to wreck the planet!*
**[1:00:07] Prof**
* I can't think of a better name,*
* so I'll just call it the Railgun (TBD), for now.*
**[1:00:12] Prof**
*Baby!*
**[1:00:13] Kazuma**
What the hell do you mean, Railgun (TBD)?!
**[1:00:16] Aqua**
I feel like... I should apologize.
**[1:00:18] Kazuma**
Quit sending dumbasses into this world!
**[1:00:21] Kazuma**
Between the Destroyer and the Mage Killer,
**[1:00:22] Kazuma**
do you realize how many times
this guy has screwed up?!
**[1:00:25] Megumin**
What did it say?!
**[1:00:26] Kazuma**
Well, do you?!
**[1:00:28] Kazuma**
They took a dangerous weapon
and used it for laundry!
**[1:00:30] Kazuma**
Is there something wrong
with the Crimson Demons?!
**[1:00:36] Sylvia**
Burn! Burn!
**[1:00:39] Sylvia**
Let this village of lunatics
be reduced to ash!
**[1:00:45] S. Goblin 1**
Sylvia-sama! You look incredible!
**[1:00:47] Fat Goblin 2**
So cool!
**[1:00:48] S. Goblin 2**
Stylish!
**[1:00:50] Sylvia**
You boys...
**[1:00:52] Sylvia**
I'm sorry you had it so rough until now.
**[1:00:55] Sylvia**
I only made it this far because of you all.
**[1:00:58] Sylvia**
Thank you! You're the best
army I could've asked for!
**[1:01:02] S. Goblin 1**
We'll follow you wherever
you lead us, Sylvia-sama!
**[1:01:02] Army**
Sylvia! Sylvia!
**[1:01:06] Chief**
This ends now!
**[1:01:11] Chief**
I am called Hiropon!
**[1:01:13] Chief**
The chief of this village,
and he who leads the Crimson Demons!
**[1:01:16] Pucchin**
I am called Pucchin! The foremost
educator among the Crimson Demons,
**[1:01:19] Pucchin**
and he who will one day be headmaster!
**[1:01:21] Shikobei**
I am called Shikobei! The foremost
fisherman among the Crimson Demons,
**[1:01:25] Shikobei**
and he who will one day catch a kraken!
**[1:01:27] Chakamiya**
I am called Chakamiya!
Owner of the foremost bakery
**[1:01:30] Chakamiya**
among the Crimson Demons,
and master of yeast!
**[1:01:32] CD G**
I am called—
**[1:01:33] CD H**
I am called—
**[1:01:34] CD I**
I am called—
**[1:01:35] Crimson Demons**
Burning Flash!
**[1:01:39] Goblins**
Sylvia-sama!
**[1:02:05] Pucchin**
It seems...
**[1:02:07] Chief**
...this won't be that easy.
**[1:02:08] Dodonko**
Hey! You didn't even get rid of the goblins!
**[1:02:12] Sylvia**
This magic weapon is magnificent.
**[1:02:14] Sylvia**
The Crimson Demons will be destroyed
by the very power they've safeguarded!
**[1:02:22] Sylvia**
Now, despair...
**[1:02:24] Sylvia**
Ancient Dispel!
**[1:02:35] Funifura**
That scared me!
**[1:02:37] Dodonko**
What the heck did she do?
**[1:02:38] Crimson Demon D**
Don't stop now! Keep lighting her up!
**[1:02:41] Funifura**
Diabolic flames, run wild! Inferno!
**[1:02:47] Crimson Demon O**
Our magic...
**[1:02:48] Crimson Demon E**
It's not casting!
**[1:02:49] Pucchin**
W-We can't teleport, either!
**[1:02:52] Chief**
This is bad! Run for it!
**[1:02:54] Chakamiya**
We can't take on the Mage Killer after all!
**[1:02:57] S. Goblin 1**
If the Crimson Demons are just a
bunch of oafs without their magic...
**[1:03:00] S. Goblin 2**
We've got them now!
**[1:03:07] S. Goblin**
Get your scrawny butts back here!
**[1:03:10] Dodonko**
Hurry!
**[1:03:10] Funifura**
Hey, slow down!
**[1:03:15] Dodonko**
Funifura!
**[1:03:21] Sylvia**
Whatever's the matter, ladies?
**[1:03:25] Sylvia**
How unlucky for you. If you were
cute boys, I might've spared you...
**[1:03:29] Sylvia**
But your people have made a
mockery of us for too long.
**[1:03:34] Arue**
Oh, no!
**[1:03:35] Yunyun**
Light of Saber!
**[1:03:53] Yunyun**
You've done enough,
Devil King Army General Sylvia!
**[1:04:00] Crimson Demon G**
That's the chief's daughter!
**[1:04:01] Funifura**
Yunyun?!
**[1:04:02] Dodonko**
Idiot! What are you doing?!
**[1:04:04] Yunyun**
I'm can't abandon my friends.
**[1:04:07] Both**
Yunyun...
**[1:04:13] Yunyun**
I am called Yunyun!
**[1:04:14] Yunyun**
Arch wizard, and wielder of advanced magic!
**[1:04:18] Yunyun**
The foremost mage among the Crimson Demons,
**[1:04:21] Yunyun**
and future leader of this village!
**[1:04:29] Chief**
My daughter!
**[1:04:30] Chief**
She used to act so embarrassed
about giving her introduction...
**[1:04:33] Pucchin**
That's my student!
I'm the one who taught her!
**[1:04:37] CD N**
Yunyun!
**[1:04:38] CD X**
You can do it!
**[1:04:39] CDs**
Yunyun! Yunyun!
**[1:04:41] CDs**
Yunyun!
**[1:04:42] Yunyun**
I challenge you to a duel, Sylvia!
**[1:04:43] Yunyun**
If you want to destroy the village,
you'll have to beat me first!
**[1:04:47] Sylvia**
How adorable.
**[1:04:49] Sylvia**
But I actually hate cute
young things like you!
**[1:04:58] Yunyun**
My crimson eyes will overlook no evil!
**[1:05:02] Both**
Yunyun!
**[1:05:03] Yunyun**
That is my crimson fate!
**[1:05:09] Kazuma**
The scope is set!
**[1:05:11] Komekko**
Yay! Yay!
**[1:05:11] Aqua**
Sacred Exorcism! Sacred Exorcism!
Sacred Exorcism!
**[1:05:11] Kazuma**
We made it in time!
**[1:05:13] Kazuma**
Time to put an end to this!
**[1:05:15] Chekera**
Huh, and I thought it was just
a pole for hanging clothes.
**[1:05:19] Hyoi**
So that's my son-in-law...
**[1:05:21] Kazuma**
Sylvia... It's been fun,
**[1:05:25] Kazuma**
but this is goodbye!
**[1:05:27] Kazuma**
Snipe.
**[1:05:31] Kazuma**
What the hell?! It's broken!
**[1:05:34] Darkness**
Here, let me see.
**[1:05:35] Darkness**
With things like this, if you just smack it...
**[1:05:37] Kazuma**
Stop it!
**[1:05:38] Aqua**
Hey, I charged that thing with
plenty of magic power! What gives?
**[1:05:40] Darkness**
I need to hit it!
**[1:05:42] Kazuma**
Shut up! We need to help Yunyun
before she's really in trouble!
**[1:05:42] Darkness**
We need to hit it!
**[1:05:47] Megumin**
And now, the star arrives!
**[1:05:48] Yunyun**
F-Forgive me! Just forget I said anything!
**[1:05:51] Sylvia**
Not happening!
**[1:05:54] Megumin**
I am called Megumin!
**[1:05:56] Megumin**
I am supreme and almighty in my dominion!
**[1:05:58] Megumin**
She who calls down the power
of the very heavens themselves!
**[1:06:02] Yuiyui**
Stop using that joke magic!
You're old enough to know better!
**[1:06:05] Yunyun**
Sorry! I'm so sorry!
**[1:06:10] Megumin**
It comes! It comes! The hordes of flame...
**[1:06:13] Megumin**
Now display your force, by my command!
**[1:06:18] Megumin**
Explosion!
**[1:06:34] Aqua**
Well, as a goddess,
**[1:06:36] Aqua**
I have an obligation to protect
Komekko's young life,
**[1:06:39] Aqua**
so I'm going to run off.
**[1:06:40] Komekko**
Hey, it's glowing now.
**[1:06:45] Kazuma**
It wasn't broken after all!
**[1:06:47] Kazuma**
It just didn't have enough magic power!
**[1:06:50] Sylvia**
Seems like you've got some
kind of scheme in mind.
**[1:06:52] Kazuma**
Sylvia!
**[1:06:54] Kazuma**
Remember my name!
**[1:06:56] Kazuma**
And when you're on the other side,
tell your buddies I said hi!
**[1:07:00] Kazuma**
I am Sa—
**[1:07:01] Komekko**
Boom!
**[1:07:11] Sylvia**
Wha...
**[1:07:12] Sylvia**
A-Am I... done?
**[1:07:22] Komekko**
I am called Komekko!
**[1:07:24] Komekko**
The foremost lovable little sister
among the Crimson Demons!
**[1:07:27] Komekko**
And she who is stronger
than a Devil King general!
**[1:07:34] Everyone**
KONOSUBA.
**[1:07:42] Sylvia**
What happened to me?
**[1:07:48] Verdia**
Hey! Hey!
**[1:07:52] Verdia**
Hey!
**[1:07:54] Verdia**
Come on! Come join us!
**[1:07:57] Hans**
I'm all clean now.
**[1:08:00] Sylvia**
Verdia and Hans?!
**[1:08:02] Sylvia**
No! Is this place—
**[1:08:07] Verdia**
Come on. Come with us, and we can
all hang out like we used to.
**[1:08:11] Hans**
Soap, detergent, soap,
detergent, soap, detergent...
**[1:08:16] Sylvia**
No! I don't want this!
**[1:08:18] Sylvia**
I don't wanna go to the other side!
**[1:08:23] Verdia**
Come... with us...
**[1:08:37] Aqua**
That was a brutal battle.
**[1:08:39] Aqua**
I swear to never hurt another person again.
**[1:08:43] Kazuma**
Seriously, stop saying stuff that sets flags!
**[1:08:49] Sylvia**
Life...
**[1:08:55] Verdia**
Join us... Come with us!
**[1:09:00] Hans**
I'm all clean now...
**[1:09:04] Sylvia**
Life!
**[1:09:07] Megumin**
What is that?!
**[1:09:08] Aqua**
Isn't that the slime we fought before?!
**[1:09:10] Darkness**
And over there...
**[1:09:13] Darkness**
The Dullahan!
**[1:09:19] Sylvia**
I won't let it end like this!
**[1:09:22] Sylvia**
My life has only just begun!
I'm going to continue living!
**[1:09:30] Kazuma**
Crap, crap, crap, crap!
**[1:09:32] Aqua**
Slow down! Kazuma-san, wait for me!
**[1:09:34] Megumin**
Faster! You need to run faster!
**[1:09:37] Yunyun**
Megumin, stop squirming!
**[1:10:02] Crimson Demons**
She revived?!
**[1:10:04] Kazuma**
What the hell is that?!
**[1:10:07] Sylvia**
My soul nearly passed on...
**[1:10:11] Sylvia**
I'm going to crush all of you!
**[1:10:23] Wiz**
Cursed Crystal Prison!
**[1:10:36] Wiz**
K-Kazuma-san, what in the world is going on?
**[1:10:40] Kazuma**
Wiz?! What are you doing here?
**[1:10:42] Vanir**
My boy, who is so gifted in
living a cowardly life...
**[1:10:46] Vanir**
In order to produce your
designs as merchandise,
**[1:10:48] Vanir**
we came to visit a craftsman in
this village, but it seems...
**[1:10:53] Vanir**
You've unleashed a magical weapon
out of fear for your own life?
**[1:10:56] Kazuma**
Wha?!
**[1:10:57] Vanir**
You can't hide the truth from
a demon that reads minds.
**[1:11:00] Vanir**
That said, if the village is destroyed,
our arrangement can't be completed...
**[1:11:04] Vanir**
My, my, what a mess.
**[1:11:08] Aqua**
Hey! I thought you were going to use
your stolen ideas to make us all rich?!
**[1:11:21] Sylvia**
Wiz?! And Vanir?!
**[1:11:24] Wiz**
Hello again, Sylvia-san.
**[1:11:26] Wiz**
Can I convince you to take
a diplomatic approach here?
**[1:11:28] Sylvia**
Hell no!
**[1:11:31] Vanir**
The Devil King's forces learning of my
survival would be more trouble than I'd like...
**[1:11:36] Trio**
You damned traitors!
**[1:11:44] Aqua**
I don't understand what just happened,
other than you screwed up again, Kazuma!
**[1:11:47] Aqua**
Well, I'm not going back
to sleeping in stables!
**[1:11:50] Aqua**
After the taste of luxury I've had,
I can't go back to living where I work!
**[1:12:09] Wiz**
Sylvia-san! I can't believe you'd turn
yourself into... that! Seriously!
**[1:12:13] Sylvia**
I'm so sure, Wiz!
Someone like you could never understand
**[1:12:16] Sylvia**
what it's like for those
of us on the front lines!
**[1:12:19] Sylvia**
The way you ditz through life,
nothing ever goes wrong!
**[1:12:22] Sylvia**
It pisses me off!
**[1:12:25] Megumin**
Kazuma, don't you have some kind of plan?!
**[1:12:28] Megumin**
Also, I demand you return my Explosion.
**[1:12:31] Kazuma**
Is now really the time?!
**[1:12:33] Kazuma**
She's fighting Wiz and Vanir
and still has the edge!
**[1:12:37] Kazuma**
Damn it!
**[1:12:46] Wiz**
My magic...
**[1:12:48] Vanir**
It seems physical damage
isn't doing much, either.
**[1:12:51] Kazuma**
How is she so strong?! It's totally unfair!
**[1:12:54] Kazuma**
Damn it! Maybe there's a weakness? Like what?!
**[1:12:58] Kazuma**
Like... like... like...
**[1:13:00] Kazuma**
Like? Like...
**[1:13:03] Kazuma**
Like? Like... My popular phase?
**[1:13:10] Aqua**
Kazuma?
**[1:13:19] Kazuma**
Damn it, fine!
**[1:13:38] Sylvia**
Traitors deserve death.
**[1:13:59] Kazuma**
You okay, Wiz?!
**[1:14:01] Wiz**
Kazuma-san!
**[1:14:03] Kazuma**
The real battle starts now!
**[1:14:12] Verdia**
The pervert knight with the terrible attacks!
**[1:14:15] Verdia**
What's become of her?
**[1:14:17] Verdia**
You! Vanir, the Mind-Reading Demon!
**[1:14:21] Vanir**
We meet again, Verdia the Hero Slayer.
**[1:14:24] Guy E**
What's going on?
What are they planning to do?
**[1:14:27] Crimson Demon**
Hey, look!
**[1:14:32] Funifura**
Megumin?!
**[1:14:33] Dodonko**
Yunyun?!
**[1:14:34] Funifura**
Those two can't even use Teleport!
**[1:14:36] Soketto**
Could it be...
**[1:14:38] Arue**
They intend to die.
**[1:14:42] Chief**
What?!
**[1:14:46] Hyoi**
My daughter... You can't die, Megumin!
**[1:14:50] CDs**
Megumin! Yunyun!
**[1:14:53] Wiz**
Everyone!
**[1:14:54] Wiz**
I need your help!
**[1:14:57] Aqua**
Blessing. Blessing. Blessing.
**[1:15:00] Aqua**
Blessing. Blessing. Blessing.
**[1:15:04] Aqua**
I've known you for a while now, Kazuma-san,
**[1:15:06] Aqua**
and you never run out of crazy ideas.
**[1:15:08] Kazuma**
It'll be fine.
**[1:15:11] Kazuma**
I've got a goddess on my side, right?
**[1:15:15] Kazuma**
Give me all you've got, partner!
**[1:15:21] Aqua**
Leave it to me!
**[1:15:35] CD F**
Is this...
**[1:15:37] Pucchin**
She's a dark one...
**[1:15:39] Pucchin**
But... twists like this are kind of my thing.
**[1:15:44] Soketto**
Right! You understand our culture
pretty well, for an outsider!
**[1:15:48] Wiz**
Thank you!
**[1:15:50] Wiz**
Now, everyone, while Kazuma
and the others are buying time,
**[1:15:54] Wiz**
give me your magic power!
**[1:16:04] Sylvia**
I'm sick of wasting my time with this village
**[1:16:06] Sylvia**
full of maniacs with nothing to show for it!
**[1:16:10] Sylvia**
I've fought this entire time with my pride
as a general in the Devil King's army!
**[1:16:14] Sylvia**
And my men, who admire me,
have fought loyally in my name!
**[1:16:18] Sylvia**
But...
**[1:16:25] Sylvia**
When I was on the verge of death,
I realized something!
**[1:16:29] Sylvia**
That I was wrong!
**[1:16:32] Sylvia**
Satisfaction and happiness
aren't the same thing!
**[1:16:35] Sylvia**
No matter how hard I try, the only
people who notice are goblins!
**[1:16:39] Goblin**
Sylvia-sama! I love you!
**[1:16:44] Sylvia**
I have relationships, but no love!
**[1:16:47] Sylvia**
I've never wanted romance
as badly as I do now!
**[1:16:50] Sylvia**
My life won't shine until
I finally have love in it!
**[1:16:54] Kazuma**
You idiot!
**[1:17:04] Kazuma**
That's not true.
**[1:17:08] Kazuma**
Sylvia, from the moment I met you...
**[1:17:15] Kazuma**
You were already shining!
**[1:17:24] Sylvia**
N-No one's ever scolded
me like that before...
**[1:17:29] Kazuma**
Sylvia.
**[1:17:37] Sylvia**
I can't believe you...
**[1:17:46] Sylvia**
I love you.
**[1:17:48] Kazuma**
I love you.
**[1:17:50] Sylvia**
I love you...
**[1:17:52] Kazuma**
...so much!
**[1:18:03] Sylvia**
I love you!
**[1:18:07] Kazuma**
*The rest is up to you guys!*
**[1:18:14] Wiz**
S-So much magic power!
**[1:18:17] Wiz**
Megumin-san, Yunyun-san,
**[1:18:19] Wiz**
it's all yours!
**[1:18:29] Yunyun**
The magic power...
**[1:18:30] Yunyun**
of everyone in the village!
**[1:18:35] Megumin**
* This is crazy! I've never heard*
* of a gamble with worse odds!*
**[1:18:39] (Flashback) Megumin**
Kazuma becoming Sylvia's weakness...
because she'll like him?
**[1:18:42] (Flashback) Megumin**
If only I knew advanced magic...
**[1:18:46] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Megumin.
**[1:18:48] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Kazuma-san has faith in your Explosion magic.
**[1:18:52] (Flashback) Yunyun**
He wouldn't come up with a
plan like this if he didn't.
**[1:18:58] (Flashback) Yunyun**
Megumin, have you lost
faith in Explosion magic?
**[1:19:06] Megumin**
Power... surging!
**[1:19:16] Yunyun**
I am called Yunyun!
**[1:19:17] Yunyun**
The foremost and greatest mage
among the Crimson Demons!
**[1:19:22] Megumin**
I am called Megumin!
**[1:19:23] Megumin**
The foremost and greatest mage
among the Crimson Demons!
**[1:19:28] Megumin**
Because Yunyun allowed me to pursue
Explosion magic on that day,
**[1:19:32] Megumin**
I became who I am now!
**[1:19:34] Yunyun**
And because I had Megumin as my
rival, I became who I am now!
**[1:19:41] Yunyun**
Light of Saber!
**[1:19:46] Megumin**
Let the storm blow! Let the flames roar!
**[1:19:53] Megumin**
Explosion magic is the stuff of dreams!
**[1:19:56] Megumin**
It is the ultimate magic that
turns the impossible possible!
**[1:20:00] Megumin**
Explosion!
**[1:20:08] Sylvia**
Love!
**[1:20:14] Darkness**
A barrier?!
**[1:20:15] Sylvia**
Dreams!
**[1:20:19] Sylvia**
Hope!
**[1:20:26] Funifura**
Don't give up, Megumin!
**[1:20:27] Dodonko**
You can do it, Yunyun!
**[1:20:29] Pucchin**
My students!
**[1:20:37] Sylvia**
That magic can't take my life!
**[1:20:40] Sylvia**
I'm moving forward! Into the future!
**[1:20:44] Kazuma**
Sylvia.
**[1:20:47] Kazuma**
Let's go...
**[1:20:50] Kazuma**
Together!
**[1:20:53] Sylvia**
I love you...
**[1:20:55] Kazuma**
I love you!
**[1:21:03] Aqua**
Kazuma was able to bring down
the barrier in her heart!
**[1:21:16] Sylvia**
Satou Kazuma... y-you... toyed with me,
**[1:21:24] Sylvia**
but I still love you!
**[1:21:27] Kazuma**
This... is... my popular phase!
**[1:21:48] Kazuma**
*And so, my popular phase came to an end.*
**[1:21:53] Kazuma**
* If Aqua hadn't used Blessing to*
* buff my luck dozens of times over,*
**[1:21:57] Kazuma**
* I would've probably been blasted*
* beyond even smithereens.*
**[1:22:02] Kazuma**
*Even with my higher than average luck stat,*
**[1:22:05] Kazuma**
*this was an incredibly risky move.*
**[1:22:11] Luna**
Welcome back, Kazuma-san.
**[1:22:14] Ruffian**
I see. Sounds like you've been through hell.
**[1:22:17] Ruffian**
But ain't that what adventuring's all about?
**[1:22:20] Ruffian**
A toast to your adventure!
**[1:22:22] Adventurers**
Let's all cheer for Kazuma!
**[1:22:25] Adventurers**
Hooray! Hooray! Hooray!
**[1:22:30] Ruffian**
Warriors deserve cheers every now and then.
**[1:22:33] Kazuma**
* There's no telling when my next*
* popular phase will kick in.*
**[1:22:40] Aqua**
There we go!
**[1:22:43] Darkness**
It's perfect weather for a picnic today.
**[1:22:46] Kazuma**
Man, yet another brutal adventure...
**[1:22:50] Megumin**
I'm sorry.
**[1:22:55] Megumin**
If I knew advanced magic,
you wouldn't have died...
**[1:23:00] Kazuma**
You've got that right.
**[1:23:02] Kazuma**
The whole process is pretty unpleasant,
until you're fully revived.
**[1:23:06] Kazuma**
Plus, the moment you die... hurts super bad.
**[1:23:14] Kazuma**
What's wrong?
**[1:23:18] Megumin**
Can I ask you to do something terrible?
**[1:23:22] Megumin**
I want to be a mage who doesn't
get in the way from now on.
**[1:23:30] Kazuma**
You want me to press the button
so you can learn advanced magic?
**[1:23:35] Kazuma**
What happened to your talk about dreams?
**[1:23:38] Megumin**
It's time to wake up. I'll be sealing
my Explosion magic away.
**[1:23:42] Megumin**
The foremost mage among the Crimson Demons,
**[1:23:45] Megumin**
and the wielder of advanced magic!
**[1:23:48] Megumin**
From now on, that'll be my calling card.
**[1:23:50] Megumin**
Since I have higher magic potential
than Yunyun, with advanced magic,
**[1:23:56] Megumin**
I know I'll be number one
among the Crimson Demons!
**[1:23:59] Megumin**
I'm not going to let her take that title.
**[1:24:11] Kazuma**
This is so dumb.
**[1:24:18] Kazuma**
Here.
**[1:24:19] Megumin**
Thanks...
**[1:24:23] Megumin**
Well, let's get going.
**[1:24:27] Kazuma**
Hey, Megumin. Light one up for me.
**[1:24:31] Kazuma**
You haven't done your daily
Explosion today, right?
**[1:24:36] Megumin**
I can't believe you...
**[1:24:38] Megumin**
To ask me to use it as soon
as I decided to stop...
**[1:24:41] Megumin**
What are you thinking?
**[1:24:50] Megumin**
Very well!
**[1:24:51] Megumin**
This will be my final Explosion magic.
**[1:24:54] Megumin**
I'll make it one to remember!
**[1:25:10] Megumin**
*Goodbye...*
**[1:25:12] Megumin**
Explosion!
**[1:25:37] Megumin**
What the...
**[1:25:50] Megumin**
I am called Megumin!
**[1:25:52] Megumin**
Arch wizard and wielder of Explosion magic!
**[1:25:56] Megumin**
Axel's foremost mage,
**[1:25:59] Megumin**
and she who will one day
master Explosion magic!
**[1:26:04] Kazuma**
*Do I need a talented mage?*
**[1:26:07] Kazuma**
* I've got one who can toy with and defeat the*
* Devil King's generals with a single Explosion.*
**[1:26:12] Kazuma**
* If you know one who can do better*
* than that, I'd like to meet them.*
**[1:26:15] Kazuma**
Up you go.
**[1:26:17] Darkness**
Kazuma! Megumin! The tea's ready!
**[1:26:20] Aqua**
I'm gonna eat your lunches!
**[1:26:23] Kazuma**
Isn't it just leftovers they gave us?
**[1:26:26] Aqua**
Well, I packed them for the picnic,
so now they're lunch!
**[1:26:28] Kazuma**
Yeah, yeah...
**[1:26:41] Kazuma**
That one gets 120 points!