E8 - Fanatics of the Water City

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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Yunyun
    I was just delivering a letter!
    I didn't think it would turn out like this!
[00:07] Yunyun
    What should we do, Megumin?!
[00:12] Cecily
    You don't need to worry.
[00:14] Cecily
    I'm sure Father Zesta is enjoying being
    interrogated by that lady knight as we speak.
[00:19] Cecily
    It'd be rude to ruin his fun.
[00:23] Cecily
    More importantly, you two wanna
    help me with collecting votes?
[00:28] Cecily
    I'm willing to pay for the labor.
[00:29] Megumin
    What votes?
[00:32] Priest A
    Oh, what a sin it is!
[00:34] Priest A
    Father Zesta was colluding with
    the Devil King's army all along!
[00:37] Priest A
    I beg you all, for our next pontiff,
    we must ensure someone more faithful,
[00:41] Priest A
    such as myself!
[00:43] Priest A
    Commit now and you'll get a free vial of
    holy water that normally costs 10,000 eris!
[00:48] Tristan
    Should I be named head of the Axis order,
    I make the following promises:
[00:52] Tristan
    One, the legalization of polyandry.
[00:56] Tristan
    Two, the marriage age
    will be further lowered!
[01:00] Tristan
    Three, even siblings will be eligible,
    as long as they love each other!
[01:04] Priest A
    Vote for the greater good! Vote for me!
[01:06] Tristan
    No, no, vote for me!
[01:08] Priest A
    No, you should vote for me!
[01:09] Tristan
    No, me!
[01:10] Priest
    No, they should vote for—
[01:11] Megumin
    Well, they certainly didn't wait long.
SIGN    KONOSUBA - An Explosion on This Wonderful World!
SIGN    Episode 8: Fanatics of the Water City
[02:50] Megumin
    Where do these Axis faithful
    get all their energy from?
[02:55] Yunyun
    I think I wanna go back to
    the Crimson Demon village.
[03:00] Cecily
    Here I am!
[03:03] Cecily
    Here's your ice-cold jelly slime!
[03:06] Megumin
    Wh-What kind of creepy beverage is this?
[03:09] Cecily
    It's an Arcanretia delicacy!
[03:11] Cecily
    The smooth mouthfeel will
    get you hooked. Just try it!
[03:16] Cecily
    These are on me.
[03:18] Cecily
    And if you convert to the Axis sect...
[03:21] Cecily
    Well, you probably know the rest by now.
[03:24] Cecily
    Now that we've done a bit of
    sabotage on the nominees,
[03:28] Cecily
    let's go and talk to the inns
    that filed the complaints.
[03:33] Yunyun
    I'm so relieved, miss! You really
    do want to investigate after all!
[03:36] Cecily
    Please, call me "Big Sister."
[03:38] Megumin
    Well, if Zesta really is innocent,
[03:41] Megumin
    it would mean being weighed down by a
    guilty conscience from here on out...
[03:44] Megumin
    For Yunyun.
[03:45] Yunyun
    No way! That's awful!
[03:47] Cecily
    Oh, Yunyun, you are so adorable!
[03:50] Cecily
    You must've felt responsible,
    but unsure what to do about it!
[03:54] Yunyun
    Miss?
[03:55] Cecily
    If thou art troubled, then instead
    focus on enjoying yourself.
[04:01] Cecily
    Let the path of least
    resistance show you the way.
[04:03] Cecily
    Flow along it, like water.
[04:05] Cecily
    Do not restrain yourself; let your
    instincts guide your actions.
[04:10] Cecily
    And... call me Big Sister.
[04:22] Cecily
    Jelly slime!
[04:24] Yunyun
    What the heck is going on?
[04:26] Megumin
    And this is supposed to be sabotage
    by the Devil King's forces?
[04:29] Yunyun
    But why would they pour slime
    mix into the hot springs?
[04:33] Megumin
    This has gotten too stupid
    already. Can I leave?
[04:36] Yunyun
    Hang on!
[04:37] Yunyun
    I get what you mean, but if this is really
    what's wrong with the hot springs...
[04:42] Megumin
    I suppose you have a point.
[04:44] Cecily
    This is where spring water from the mountains
    is collected and flows to the various inns!
[04:50] Cecily
    And because the Axis order runs it, we get
    to do whatever we want around town!
[04:56] Megumin
    Your order is really pretty awful, isn't it?
[04:59] Yunyun
    And there are reports that the strangeness
    began after Father Zesta visited this place...
[05:05] Cecily
    Yes, it seems so.
[05:08] Cecily
    I think he might be guilty after all.
[05:11] Megumin
    Be that as it may,
[05:12] Megumin
    ambiguity leaves a bad aftertaste,
    so let's make sure we have evidence.
[05:15] Yunyun
    You probably shouldn't assume he's guilty.
[05:22] Cop
    You ladies Axis sect?
[05:24] Cop
    You people are late.
    We've already recovered the evidence.
[05:27] Megumin
    Is it in that bag?
[05:30] Cop
    A ton of jelly slime mix.
[05:34] Cop
    Father Zesta was spotted
    carrying this bag around.
[05:38] Cop
    I don't think there's any
    way out of this for him.
[05:41] Megumin
    Even so...
[05:43] Megumin
    Why would he do something so ridiculous?
[05:46] Megumin
    If his aim was to ruin the hot springs,
    couldn't he have poisoned them instead?
[05:51] Yunyun
    Poison...
[05:53] Cop
    The thing is, when someone tells you the
    Axis cult pulled something like this,
[05:57] Cop
    it suddenly makes a lot of sense.
[06:01] Yunyun
    I mean... he's definitely strange, 
    but he didn't seem actually evil.
[06:07] Cecily
    It's probably clean if I drink it
    directly from the faucet, right?
[06:10] Cecily
    Right?! Anyone have a cup? And can
    any of you use the spell Freeze?
[06:16] Everyone else
    This is the problem with the Axis cult...
[06:23] Yunyun
    Do you think Father Zesta really is
    involved with the Devil King's army?
[06:27] Yunyun
    He sure doesn't seem that way.
[06:33] Megumin
    I suppose even she's
    feeling down about this.
[06:37] Cecily
    They said I couldn't drink any
    because it was evidence...
[06:40] Cecily
    even though there was so much!
[06:45] Megumin
    Well, what's done is done.
[06:48] Megumin
    I'm sure he'll be back better than
    ever after paying his debt to society.
[06:52] Yunyun
    I'm pretty sure the penalty for
    conspiracy to commit treason is death.
[06:58] Zesta
    Well, if apologies were good enough,
    wouldn't all of you be out of a job!?
[07:02] Zesta
    You accused me, the head of
    the Axis Religious Order...
[07:06] Zesta
    Me, of all people!
[07:09] Zesta
    Of colluding with demoniacal
    forces?! Are you mad?!
[07:13] Lady Knight
    I'm so sorry. So please,
    could you leave it at that...
[07:16] Zesta
    For goodness' sake.
[07:16] Cecily
    Father Zesta?
[07:18] Zesta
    Oh, if it isn't Cecily.
[07:22] Zesta
    You must've been waiting for my release!
[07:25] Trio
    You were released?!
[07:27] Zesta
    Are you really that shocked?
[07:29] Zesta
    It should be obvious I would never
    commit such a foolish crime.
[07:33] Zesta
    Go on, tell them!
[07:36] Lady Knight
    For mistakenly arresting the honorable
    Father Zesta of the Axis Order...
[07:43] Lady Knight
    I'd like to offer a sincere apology!
[07:46] Cops
    We apologize, Father Zesta!
[07:49] Zesta
    That reminds me!
[07:51] Zesta
    That smug-looking prosecutor in glasses, who
    showed up with that lie-detecting magic device...
[07:56] Zesta
    Please make sure to give her my thanks.
[08:00] Zesta
    She was the one who cleared
    these suspicions up.
[08:02] Zesta
    And the sight of her cool, confident face
    slowly welling up with tears was quite a treat!
[08:11] Zesta
    If I had my druthers, you'd be crawling at
    my feet, giving my toes a good licking...
[08:20] Zesta
    But I suppose, in my magnanimity,
    I'll let you off this time.
[08:24] Lady Knight
    Th-Th-Thank you for your
    generosity in this ma—
[08:31] Zesta
    If only your brain...
[08:34] Zesta
    was half as big as those breasts of yours!
[08:43] Megumin
    But this doesn't actually solve
    the problem at hand, does it?
[08:48] Megumin
    The truth remains that someone has been
    pouring that powder into the springs.
[08:53] Zesta
    Indeed it does.
[09:13] Megumin
    Well, you certainly inspire
    a lot of devotion.
[09:18] Arnes
    We meet again.
[09:20] Arnes
    You certainly managed to give
    me the slip last time.
[09:25] Zesta
    What is this?!
[09:26] Zesta
    Miss Megumin, who is this
    scandalously-clad vixen?!
[09:29] Megumin
    Appearing in the middle of a town like
    this... You seem awfully confident.
[09:34] Megumin
    Are you that desperate to
    take Chomusuke from me?
[09:36] Zesta
    Miss Megumin!
[09:38] Zesta
    What is your relationship with this woman
    who is flaunting her bosom so brazenly?!
[09:42] Arnes
    Those irritating townsfolk aren't
    here to save you this time.
[09:46] Arnes
    I'd normally just crush you both
    and be done with it,
[09:49] Arnes
    but since Lady Wolbach seems
    attached, I'll simply—
[09:51] Zesta
    Miss Megumin, please, I need to know!
[09:53] Zesta
    Why is she dressed like such a jezebel?!
[09:57] Zesta
    And the fact that she's wearing a robe,
    as if it hides anything, is indecent!
[10:01] Zesta
    It's indecent, I say!
[10:02] Zesta
    And yet, for how indecent it is, there is
    also a razor-sharp aesthetic edge to it.
[10:07] Zesta
    Yes, a bit like the transgressive thrill from
    the combination of a swimsuit and a raincoat—
[10:11] Arnes
    Would you knock it off?!
    Who the hell are you?! Buzz off!
[10:15] Megumin
    I wouldn't provoke her, Zesta.
[10:18] Megumin
    She's our enemy.
[10:20] Megumin
    She followed us all the way here
    in pursuit of this furball.
[10:23] Zesta
    Oh, so she's after Chomusuke...
[10:25] Zesta
    That's a rather whimsical motivation
    for such an edgy-looking individual.
[10:29] Yunyun
    Could you two leave it at that?
[10:31] Yunyun
    I think you're just angering her further.
[10:36] Arnes
    All right, worms, if you want
    to spare yourselves some pain—
[10:39] Zesta
    And what should I do if I want
    you to hurt me instead?!
[10:42] Yunyun
    F-Father Zesta!
[10:44] Arnes
    Then I'll do just that!
[10:46] Arnes
    Fireball!
[10:51] Zesta
    Oh... She's a demon girl.
[10:54] Zesta
    Reflect.
[11:04] Arnes
    Well, I thought you were
    just some old freak,
[11:07] Arnes
    but that was impressive.
[11:10] Yunyun
    Wh-Wh-Wh-What was that?!
[11:12] Megumin
    The old pervert who got arrested did that?!
[11:16] Zesta
    A demon girl... So, a demon?
[11:20] Zesta
    From orcs to ogres, I've always
    thought myself open-minded...
[11:24] Zesta
    But demon girls?
[11:25] Zesta
    The commandments of the Axis
    order forbid appreciating them!
[11:29] Zesta
    Frustrating though it may be...
[11:32] Arnes
    And what, exactly, can a human
    priest do against me?
[11:36] Cecily
    He can destroy you.
[11:48] Arnes
    You have quite the sense of humor.
[11:50] Arnes
    I am a servant of the great
    dark god, Wolbach, and I—
[11:53] Zesta
    Sacred Highness Exorcism!
[12:02] Zesta
    I beg your pardon, miss demon girl.
[12:07] Zesta
    I am the head of the Holy Order of Axis,
[12:12] Zesta
    the arch priest, Zesta.
[12:15] Cecily
    Likewise, I am a beautiful priest
    of the Axis Order, Cecily.
[12:21] Zesta
    Sister Cecily, it seems this demon girl
    is the perpetrator behind this mess.
[12:26] Cecily
    I believe so, Father Zesta.
[12:28] Cecily
    She's the reason you had
    to go through that ordeal.
[12:32] Arnes
    What are you talking about?
[12:35] Arnes
    What is any of this?
[12:37] Arnes
    I-I've been looking for
    Lady Wolbach ever since I got here!
[12:48] Zesta
    She's fleeing! After her!
[12:51] Zesta
    In the name of the Axis Church, make her
    rue the day she was born a demon girl!
[12:56] Cecily
    Right away, sir!
[12:58] Cecily
    Demons...
[13:00] Cecily
    ...must die!
[13:03] Arnes
    I'll let you—
[13:06] Zesta
    It's a demon hunt!
[13:14] Yunyun
    What was that?
[13:15] Megumin
    Please, don't ask me.
[13:18] Zesta
    String her up!
SIGN    KONOSUBA - An Explosion on This Wonderful World!
[13:20] Yunyun
    So... does that take care of everything?
[13:24] Megumin
    Hard to say. I'd honestly rather not think
    about the Axis Sect at all anymore.
[13:32] Megumin
    What are you going to do now, Yunyun?
[13:35] Megumin
    I'm headed for the town of Axel.
[13:37] Megumin
    I heard there's someone there
    who can use explosion magic.
[13:41] Yunyun
    I...
[13:43] Yunyun
    I-I'm headed to Axel, too. I thought I could
    start training against weak monsters.
[13:50] Megumin
    Well, isn't that a coincidence?
[13:52] Megumin
    Go on ahead without me, then.
[13:54] Megumin
    I'll be along once I've earned
    enough money for the trip.
[13:58] Yunyun
    Huh?
[14:00] Yunyun
    B-But since I'm in no hurry...
[14:04] Yunyun
    I-I know! Maybe I'll do a bit of sightseeing
    around town, and then head to Axel...
[14:12] Zesta
    Ah, Miss Megumin, you're still here.
[14:16] Zesta
    That demon was a slippery one, I must say.
[14:19] Zesta
    I was enjoying her tears so much,
[14:21] Zesta
    I kept only grazing her with my
    magic, which let her escape.
[14:25] Megumin
    You seem happy about that.
[14:28] Zesta
    Don't be silly. I'm beside
    myself with frustration.
[14:33] Zesta
    Now, then, Miss Megumin, if you would...
[14:41] Megumin
    What is it?
[14:43] Zesta
    The cost of a coach trip to Axel.
[14:47] Zesta
    The recruitment methods you taught me...
[14:52] Zesta
    I'm certain they'll come
    in handy, yes indeed.
[14:55] Zesta
    Why, they might even become
    an attraction for the town.
[14:59] Zesta
    Consider that coach fare to
    be my way of thanking you.
[15:02] Zesta
    So, what will you do for today?
[15:05] Zesta
    Late as it is, I believe there's
    still one last departure for Axel...
[15:12] Megumin
    I can just go to Axel?
[15:14] Megumin
    I want to go.
[15:16] Megumin
    I want to get there as soon as possible,
    and tell her about what's happened!
[15:20] Megumin
    Then I want to gather companions,
[15:22] Megumin
    and unleash the explosion magic I've
    been aching to use for so long!
[15:26] Megumin
    I'll head there right away!
[15:28] Megumin
    Oh, Yunyun, you're going to do
    some sightseeing first, right?
[15:32] Megumin
    I'll just be heading to Axel first, then.
[15:36] Yunyun
    Aw, come on!
[15:37] Yunyun
    M-Maybe I've changed my mind?
[15:40] Yunyun
    If you go now and start training
    before me, you'll have an advantage!
[15:47] Zesta
    Miss Megumin, since it's late,
    why not stay the night?
[15:52] Zesta
    There are many from our order who'd
    like to give you their regards.
[15:56] Megumin
    Now that you mention it,
    that's a good point. What should I do?
[16:01] Zesta
    You could even stay another
    week, if you like.
[16:04] Megumin
    That might be nice!
[16:17] Cecily
    Isn't the water nice, Megumin?
[16:20] Cecily
    Bathing with a loli...
[16:24] Megumin
    Is there a reason that predatory gaze of
    yours has been making me feel threatened?
[16:29] Cecily
    What am I supposed to do?
    It's a tiny little bath.
[16:33] Cecily
    Y'know?
[16:33] Megumin
    Just know, I fight back when people
    try anything strange with me!
[16:38] Cecily
    Aw...
[16:39] Cecily
    Actually, there was something
    I wanted to tell you in private.
[16:48] Megumin
    Huh?!
[16:49] Megumin
    You mean Zesta did it after all?!
[16:51] Cecily
    That's right. Seems he mixed up the baking
    soda and slime mix when cleaning up.
[16:58] Megumin
    That was it?
[17:00] Cecily
    Which means it had nothing to
    do with demons, after all.
[17:04] Cecily
    But don't tell anyone else about this, okay?
[17:07] Cecily
    I want exclusive dibs on this
    piece of blackmail bait.
[17:11] Megumin
    Well, it doesn't really matter now, anyway.
[17:17] Megumin
    Uh... You're awfully close.
[17:19] Cecily
    It's a small bath! What can you do?
[17:23] Cecily
    Y'know, tight as it is, these baths
    apparently cost quite a bit to dig.
[17:29] Cecily
    They apparently hired a skilled mage who
    created the holes with rupture magic.
[17:35] Cecily
    See how nicely they're
    shaped in little rings?
[17:39] Megumin
    Rupture magic?
[17:41] Cecily
    Apparently. They wanted to
    make bigger baths, I heard.
[17:47] Megumin
    Miss...
[17:49] Cecily
    What is it?
[17:51] Cecily
    And I'd be really happy if you
    finally said "Big Sister Cecily"
[17:54] Cecily
    in an adoring voice, instead of just "miss."
[17:57] Megumin
    Miss!
[17:58] Megumin
    Let's see... You want a bigger
    open-air bath, right?
[18:03] Cecily
    That would be nice.
[18:04] Cecily
    Why do you ask? And why are
    your eyes sparkling like that?
[18:11] Megumin
    I can use explosion magic.
[18:16] Megumin
    Is it okay if I create the largest
    bath in this entire city?
[18:23] Cecily
    Yeah, of course.
[18:25] Cecily
    In the Axis Order, we believe anything
    goes, as long as it's not illegal!
[18:32] Cecily
    Follow your heart, and fire
    away with your magic!
[18:39] Megumin
    All right, miss.
[18:41] Cecily
    Call me Big Sister!
[18:42] Megumin
    Here we go, miss!
[18:51] Megumin
    I've been holding back ever
    since I got to Arcanretia.
[18:57] Megumin
    Explosion!
[19:32] Zesta
    I must say, I never would've guessed
    you could use explosion magic!
[19:37] Zesta
    I can't thank you enough, Miss Megumin.
[19:40] Zesta
    A bath that big can fit everyone
    in the order at once!
[19:45] Cecily
    No mixed bathing, Father Zesta.
[19:49] Zesta
    Well, be that as it may, I hope you'll come
    and visit us the next time you're in town.
[19:54] Megumin
    I think I will.
[19:56] Megumin
    Once I've found companions, if the
    subject of a vacation ever comes up,
[20:01] Megumin
    I believe we'll come straight here.
[20:04] Zesta
    May the divine Aqua offer her
    protection on your journey.
[20:09] Zesta
    Blessing.
[20:16] Yunyun
    U-Um, Father Zesta? Could you
    cast that spell on me, too?
[20:22] Megumin
    His troubles did begin with the
    letter you brought, Yunyun...
[20:25] Yunyun
    No fair! That wasn't my fault!
[20:30] Megumin
    I didn't do enough to earn
    something like this...
[20:34] Cecily
    It's okay. I'm sure you'll need it.
[20:40] Cecily
    Just take it! Kids don't
    need to be so considerate.
[20:52] Cecily
    Make good use of those
    once you get to Axel—
[20:57] Driver
    The coach for Axel is leaving!
[21:02] Megumin
    I'm heading out!
[21:03] Yunyun
    Wait for me!
[21:12] Driver
    This coach is now rolling out for Axel!
[21:20] Megumin
    The town for beginning adventurers, Axel.
[21:23] Megumin
    I'll make that my base of
    operations as I gather allies.
[21:28] Megumin
    Ideally, I'd like a party that's a match
    for me, full of advanced classes.
[21:34] Megumin
    A reliable, courageous leader.
[21:37] Megumin
    A sturdy front-line fighter.
[21:39] Megumin
    A benevolent healer...
[21:41] Megumin
    And me, the one who analyzes
    situations with her brilliant mind
[21:45] Megumin
    before delivering certain victory...
[21:48] Megumin
    with a single spell!
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
SIGN    Episode 9: "Destroyer from the Crimson Demon Village"
[23:25] Yunyun
    Big trouble, Megumin!
[23:27] Yunyun
    We managed to board the coach to Axel,
    but it's been attacked by monsters!
[23:29] Megumin
    I'll obliterate them with
    my explosion magic!
[23:31] Yunyun
    Hang on! You'll kill us all!
[23:33] Megumin
    Let me do it!  Please, let me do it!
[23:35] Yunyun
    N-Next time, we'll dig up your
    shameful secrets with an...
[23:37] Megumin
    Explosion!