# E9 - Past
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G50UZEZE2/past)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:03] ---**
Come home.
**[00:05] ---**
You know you can't stay here.
**[00:07] ---**
No!
**[00:09] ---**
I'm... not ready.
**[00:12] ---**
How long are you going
to act like a child?
**[00:16] ---**
You just stopped answering my calls,
and then you came all the way out here.
**[00:19] ---**
What if somebody with
bad intentions took you in?
**[00:22] ---**
Well...
**[00:24] ---**
Yoshida-san is a good person.
**[00:30] ---**
Sayu, adults aren't like kids. They can
pretend to be good people all they want.
**[00:34] ---**
Yoshida-san isn't like that!
**[00:38] ---**
Don't try to use him against me!
**[02:12] ---**
Yes. I'm sorry.
***SIGN*** "Past"
**[02:17] ---**
Sorry about that. I took the day off work,
so I can hear all you have to say.
**[02:23] ---**
Thank you.
**[02:26] ---**
Let me start with this.
**[02:27] ---**
Has anything inappropriate
happened between you two?
**[02:29] ---**
No.
**[02:29] ---**
Absolutely not!
**[02:31] ---**
I see.
**[02:33] ---**
So let me thank you for taking her in.
**[02:40] ---**
No...
**[02:41] ---**
I was worried about the environment
she'd found herself in.
**[02:46] ---**
I can imagine.
**[02:48] ---**
Sayu, Mother is worried.
**[02:51] ---**
You're lying!
Mom would never worry about me!
**[02:54] ---**
She's looking for you, if nothing else.
**[02:57] ---**
That woman would never do
something like that!
**[03:01] ---**
Tell me the real reason.
**[03:06] ---**
Your teacher's come looking for you
several times since you left.
**[03:11] ---**
She doesn't want any incidents,
**[03:14] ---**
so she's told him you've locked
yourself inside your room.
**[03:17] ---**
It seems that the school now thinks
she may be locking you in there.
**[03:23] ---**
And she wants me to go back
to prove them wrong?
**[03:28] ---**
Then what she's worried about
is what people will say.
**[03:31] ---**
Not Sayu's feelings?
**[03:34] ---**
I don't believe so.
**[03:36] ---**
But I can't say definitely
that she's put much thought into it at all.
**[03:42] ---**
Once our mother gets an idea,
she doesn't give it up.
**[03:44] ---**
It will be difficult for you
to continue to run.
**[03:49] ---**
Can we have a few days, at least?
**[03:53] ---**
A few days?
**[03:55] ---**
Just a few.
**[03:57] ---**
Is that possible?
**[03:59] ---**
It seems to me
that Sayu needs time to think.
**[04:07] ---**
Would you let me talk to Sayu
for a moment, alone?
**[04:11] ---**
I promise I won't take her away.
**[04:15] ---**
All right.
**[04:16] ---**
Is that okay with you too, Sayu?
**[04:18] ---**
Yeah.
**[04:22] ---**
I'm sorry.
**[04:24] ---**
This must've surprised you, right?
**[04:27] ---**
I'm sure it was a shock to you, too.
**[04:29] ---**
I thought that you'd get to go home
when you were ready.
**[04:33] ---**
That it was your choice.
**[04:36] ---**
Yeah.
**[04:37] ---**
But we found out it's not that simple.
**[04:42] ---**
Yoshida-san!
**[04:44] ---**
What's wrong?
**[04:46] ---**
I'm a little scared.
**[04:48] ---**
I thought I had to go back someday,
**[04:50] ---**
but now that the day's finally here,
**[04:53] ---**
I realize how weak I am.
**[04:57] ---**
I'm scared, too.
**[05:00] ---**
So don't worry.
**[05:06] ---**
Yoshida-san, when I'm with you,
I feel relaxed.
**[05:10] ---**
Thank you. I'll go talk with my brother.
**[05:14] ---**
Okay, good luck!
**[05:28] ---**
*It's a good thing!*
**[05:31] ---**
*I was hoping Sayu'd go back, anyway.*
**[05:36] ---**
*But now...*
**[05:42] ---**
There aren't many adults out there who'd
take in another's child out of pure goodwill.
**[05:47] ---**
Yeah.
**[05:49] ---**
I was worried about
what might've happened to you.
**[05:53] ---**
But I feel a little better.
**[05:56] ---**
He seems really worried about you, huh?
**[06:01] ---**
Yeah.
**[06:05] ---**
Mother calls and asks if I found you.
**[06:10] ---**
Every single day.
**[06:11] ---**
I see.
**[06:13] ---**
After what happened, she's been unstable.
**[06:17] ---**
It's been worse since you left.
**[06:21] ---**
So you should go back, for now.
**[06:24] ---**
I'll help you all I can.
**[06:28] ---**
At first, I ran because it was painful.
**[06:32] ---**
But that was true no matter where I went.
**[06:37] ---**
I realized I was alone
no matter where I went.
**[06:41] ---**
And then I met Yoshida-san.
**[06:44] ---**
He taught me how stupid I'd been.
**[06:46] ---**
About how important the things
I lost coming here were.
**[06:52] ---**
So I told myself that I needed to start
thinking for myself about what I want to be.
**[06:59] ---**
Until I know what I'm going to take back home
with me, after coming all this way,
**[07:05] ---**
I don't want to go home.
**[07:12] ---**
I see.
**[07:13] ---**
You've changed a little, too.
**[07:17] ---**
You speak your mind more than you did before.
**[07:23] ---**
Yeah. You may be right.
**[07:26] ---**
I can buy you a week at most—
convince her that I just haven't found you yet.
**[07:33] ---**
Do you mean...?
**[07:36] ---**
I mean, "Take a week to think."
**[07:44] ---**
Thank you.
***SIGN*** Today
***SIGN*** You up?
***SIGN*** Yeah.
***SIGN*** What is it?
***SIGN*** Can you come to Yoshida-san's house ASAP? I need to talk to you.
***SIGN*** Got it.
***SIGN*** I'll be there in 30.
***SIGN*** Thanks
**[07:59] ---**
I see. So you've gotta
head back in a week, huh?
**[08:04] ---**
Yeah.
**[08:06] ---**
Man, I'm gonna miss you.
**[08:10] ---**
Your brother gave your decision more
respect than I thought he would.
**[08:14] ---**
I guess so.
**[08:16] ---**
You've got a week.
You need to use it to think.
**[08:20] ---**
Yeah.
**[08:23] ---**
So I want to tell you
what's happened to me until now.
**[08:28] ---**
Okay. My friend's facing her past.
**[08:32] ---**
I need to support her,
or I'm not a real friend.
**[08:34] ---**
Yeah...
**[08:35] ---**
Are you nervous, Yoshida-cchi?
**[08:38] ---**
Shut up!
**[08:42] ---**
Okay, I'll tell you, then.
**[08:45] ---**
I never got along with my mother.
**[08:50] ---**
And that was one of the reasons that,
when I got to high school,
**[08:53] ---**
I never really wanted
to put effort into anything.
**[08:56] ---**
Not my schoolwork,
not hanging out with friends...
**[08:59] ---**
I didn't care about any of it.
**[09:01] ---**
Everyone else avoided me,
and that was fine.
**[09:06] ---**
But...
**[09:08] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu-chan, can I eat lunch with you?
**[09:10] (Flashback) ---**
Okay, I guess...
**[09:18] (Flashback) ---**
Um, what is it, Yuuko?
**[09:21] (Flashback) ---**
You look really cool in profile.
**[09:24] (Flashback) ---**
What the heck?
**[09:26] (Flashback) ---**
Why are you so cool?
**[09:28] (Flashback) ---**
"Why"?
**[09:32] ---**
Yuuko was like me. She didn't fit in.
**[09:37] ---**
To the others, I'm sure it just looked like
two class rejects hanging out.
**[09:42] ---**
But I really enjoyed being with Yuuko.
**[09:47] (Flashback) ---**
You look your best
when you're smiling, Sayu-chan.
**[09:52] ---**
Because of her, I started to smile.
**[09:57] ---**
But...
***SIGN*** Math II
**[10:00] ---**
Yuuko started being bullied
by a group of girls.
**[10:07] (Flashback) ---**
You okay?
**[10:09] (Flashback) ---**
Yeah.
**[10:11] (Flashback) ---**
But why is this happening to you?
**[10:18] (Flashback) ---**
Yuuko?
**[10:23] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu-chan, one of the guys on the basketball team
asked you out, and you rejected him, right?
**[10:29] (Flashback) ---**
Y-Yeah...
**[10:32] (Flashback) ---**
One of them likes him. I think that's why.
**[10:37] (Flashback) ---**
But wouldn't they go after me then?
**[10:41] (Flashback) ---**
Well... you have a pretty face. You're cool.
**[10:49] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu-chan, you just don't look like a bad person.
**[10:52] (Flashback) ---**
No matter what lies they tell about you,
**[10:54] (Flashback) ---**
they can't get everybody to hate you.
**[10:57] (Flashback) ---**
So they went after you instead?
**[11:01] (Flashback) ---**
But it's fine.
**[11:03] (Flashback) ---**
I'm gloomy. I'm not pretty at all.
**[11:07] (Flashback) ---**
It's weird for me to be hanging out with you.
**[11:12] (Flashback) ---**
Yuuko...
**[11:14] (Flashback) ---**
They said I was like your groupie.
**[11:16] (Flashback) ---**
But they're not wrong.
**[11:18] (Flashback) ---**
That's not true!
**[11:22] (Flashback) ---**
Yuuko, you're my first friend!
**[11:35] (Flashback) ---**
Here.
**[11:39] ---**
My friend was being bullied because of me.
**[11:43] ---**
And I didn't even realize it.
**[11:45] ---**
It made me sick.
**[11:51] (Flashback) ---**
I'm sure she's got the idea by now.
**[11:53] (Flashback) ---**
Right?
**[11:54] (Flashback) ---**
Little Miss Princess needs to choose
better friends, don't you think?
**[11:58] (Flashback) ---**
Right?
**[12:00] (Flashback) ---**
I bet she thinks hanging out with the girl
with no friends makes the boys like her more.
**[12:06] (Flashback) ---**
Yuuko!
**[12:16] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu-chan!
**[12:32] (Flashback) ---**
I'll never betray you.
So let's fight together!
**[12:37] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu-chan!
**[12:46] ---**
I thought we'd be okay, together.
**[12:48] ---**
That we couldn't lose.
**[12:52] ---**
But looking back,
I think I'd made a big mistake.
**[13:03] (Flashback) ---**
Wh-What are you doing, Yuuko?
**[13:09] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu-chan.
**[13:11] (Flashback) ---**
Th-That's really dangerous.
Come back...
**[13:16] (Flashback) ---**
I've been waiting for you here.
**[13:20] (Flashback) ---**
When I first saw you,
I thought you were really pretty.
**[13:26] (Flashback) ---**
Solitary, beautiful...
Keeping everyone away.
**[13:30] (Flashback) ---**
What are you talking about?
**[13:32] (Flashback) ---**
But I'm not very smart,
so I got close to you anyway.
**[13:37] (Flashback) ---**
And when I talked to you,
you were just an ordinary, cute girl.
**[13:42] (Flashback) ---**
Kind, caring, with a wonderful smile.
**[13:49] (Flashback) ---**
And I ruined that.
**[13:53] (Flashback) ---**
I turned the solitary and beautiful Sayu-chan
**[13:56] (Flashback) ---**
into a stupid girl who hangs
out with a loser like me.
**[14:01] (Flashback) ---**
You're not like me!
**[14:04] (Flashback) ---**
You can shine brighter!
**[14:06] (Flashback) ---**
And I—
**[14:08] (Flashback) ---**
the person who admires you most—
**[14:12] (Flashback) ---**
I ruined it.
**[14:15] (Flashback) ---**
Did you know you've stopped
laughing altogether lately?
**[14:20] (Flashback) ---**
All you think about is protecting me.
You always look so depressed.
**[14:26] (Flashback) ---**
O-Of course! You're my friend!
**[14:29] (Flashback) ---**
Thank you.
**[14:31] (Flashback) ---**
But you know,
that hurt me more than anything.
**[14:36] (Flashback) ---**
This isn't your fault, you know.
**[14:40] (Flashback) ---**
Yuuko?
**[14:42] (Flashback) ---**
So keep on smiling, okay?
**[15:28] (Flashback) ---**
Are you home?
**[15:29] (Flashback) ---**
Ogiwara-san, are you there?
**[15:31] (Flashback) ---**
Leave us alone!
I told you we have nothing to do with it!
**[15:36] (Flashback) ---**
Ogiwara-san, wait!
**[15:38] (Flashback) ---**
Ogiwara-san, just answer a few questions!
**[16:01] (Flashback) ---**
Mom...
**[16:03] (Flashback) ---**
This is all your fault!
**[16:05] (Flashback) ---**
Stop making my life harder, damn it!
**[16:08] (Flashback) ---**
I'm sorry.
**[16:09] (Flashback) ---**
Why are they mad at us
about somebody else's suicide?
**[16:13] (Flashback) ---**
Issa's working so hard, but all you do is...
**[16:17] (Flashback) ---**
I'm sorry.
**[16:21] (Flashback) ---**
Don't tell me.
You didn't kill her, did you?
**[16:34] (Flashback) ---**
Shut the hell up.
**[16:37] (Flashback) ---**
Of course I didn't!
**[16:40] (Flashback) ---**
You'll never understand!
**[16:42] (Flashback) ---**
My best friend was bullied
because of me, and she died!
**[16:46] (Flashback) ---**
You'll never understand how that feels!
**[16:53] (Flashback) ---**
If I bother you that much, I'll just leave.
**[16:59] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu, is it okay for you to leave the house?
**[17:02] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu!
**[17:04] (Flashback) ---**
Let me go!
**[17:05] (Flashback) ---**
I'm done with this place!
**[17:08] (Flashback) ---**
Calm down.
**[17:09] (Flashback) ---**
What happened?
**[17:12] (Flashback) ---**
Mom asked me...
**[17:15] (Flashback) ---**
if I killed Yuuko!
**[17:20] (Flashback) ---**
She did what?
**[17:26] (Flashback) ---**
I understand. You should probably
get some distance from Mother.
**[17:36] (Flashback) ---**
Goodbye.
**[17:38] (Flashback) ---**
Sayu, take this.
**[17:41] (Flashback) ---**
There's 300,000 yen inside.
**[17:43] (Flashback) ---**
If you don't go on a spending spree,
it'll last you two weeks.
**[17:46] (Flashback) ---**
I can't take that.
**[17:48] (Flashback) ---**
And I can't have you running away
without any money.
**[17:51] (Flashback) ---**
Listen. You need to stay in a real hotel.
**[17:55] (Flashback) ---**
And contact me if you feel you're in danger.
**[18:00] (Flashback) ---**
If you can promise me those two things,
**[18:02] (Flashback) ---**
I can keep Mother from finding out.
**[18:06] (Flashback) ---**
Thank you.
**[18:07] (Flashback) ---**
You've been through a lot.
**[18:10] (Flashback) ---**
Get some rest.
**[18:14] (Flashback) ---**
Okay.
**[18:19] ---**
I ran away from my mom and was finally free,
**[18:25] ---**
but I never felt any better.
**[18:28] ---**
All I felt was loneliness.
**[18:31] ---**
At some point, the money
my brother gave me ran out.
**[18:35] ---**
And then the emptiness and
the feelings of worthlessness crept in.
**[18:40] ---**
Even his kindness started
to feel like pity to me.
***SIGN*** Ogiwara Issa
**[18:44] ---**
In the end, I didn't mean anything to anyone.
**[18:50] ---**
By the time I realized that,
even I was surprised at how much I didn't care.
**[18:57] ---**
And then...
**[18:59] (Flashback) ---**
Hey, what's a girl your age
doing out at this hour?
**[19:05] (Flashback) ---**
I ran away from home.
**[19:07] (Flashback) ---**
I don't have anywhere to go.
**[19:10] (Flashback) ---**
Fine. It's dangerous to be out here alone.
**[19:12] (Flashback) ---**
You can stay with me tonight.
**[19:17] (Flashback) ---**
It's not a bother?
**[19:19] ---**
At first, I didn't even realize I'd said it.
**[19:22] ---**
And that's how it started.
**[19:26] ---**
At first, I thought maybe he was letting
me stay out of the goodness of his heart.
**[19:30] ---**
But after a few days, he wanted sex.
**[19:34] ---**
And since I didn't want
to go home, I gave in.
**[19:42] ---**
I'm really stupid, huh?
**[19:43] ---**
I don't even remember the name
of the guy I was with my first time.
**[19:47] ---**
Sayu-chan...
**[19:49] ---**
And you know the rest.
**[19:52] ---**
Once it started, I just kept going.
**[19:56] ---**
Sex for a place to stay.
**[19:58] ---**
I kept that up...
**[20:01] ---**
until I met Yoshida-san.
**[20:04] ---**
That's everything that happened to me
after I left Hokkaido until I met Yoshida-san.
**[20:11] ---**
I see...
**[20:13] ---**
Thanks for telling me.
**[20:16] ---**
Sayu-chan, you really
hung in there, didn't you?
**[20:23] ---**
Yeah...
**[20:25] ---**
You really did, huh?
**[20:28] ---**
Yeah, I did.
**[20:31] ---**
I really did.
**[20:46] ---**
She calmed down.
**[20:48] ---**
I see.
**[20:50] ---**
I knew there was something,
**[20:53] ---**
but I didn't think it'd be this bad.
**[20:56] ---**
Yeah.
**[20:58] ---**
Her friend committed suicide,
**[20:59] ---**
and her mom, who should've been more
supportive than anybody, blamed her instead.
**[21:03] ---**
Even an adult couldn't handle that.
**[21:06] ---**
So, what will you do?
**[21:08] ---**
About what?
**[21:10] ---**
About Sayu-chaso.
**[21:13] ---**
Just let her go home?
**[21:17] ---**
Her family's come to get her.
**[21:18] ---**
I'm a stranger. I can't do a thing.
**[21:21] ---**
A stranger? After all that's happened?
**[21:26] ---**
This is a problem for her family to solve.
**[21:29] ---**
Who knows if her family's even on her side?!
**[21:32] ---**
What do you want to do, Yoshida-cchi?
**[21:34] ---**
Were you listening?
**[21:36] ---**
It's not my place to get involved.
**[21:38] ---**
That's not what I'm asking.
**[21:41] ---**
I'm not asking what your "place" is!
**[21:45] ---**
I'm asking what you want to do about her.
**[21:49] ---**
What I...
**[21:54] ---**
...want to do?
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** "Proof"
***SIGN*** Watch next week, okay?