Season 1

1 - In English, "Unmei" Means "Destiny"

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] Hay
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:09] Nag
    That's right
[00:21] Robo
    Hey, Nagi Sanzenin! Come quietly
    and fall prey to this robot!
[00:26] Nag
    Don't be ridiculous! Why should I?!
[00:28] ---
    Naritasan
[00:28] Robo
    Ah! That's because there's someone who
    will profit greatly by your death!
[00:34] Nag
    Impossible, for five reasons!
[00:36] Robo
    What?
[00:37] Nag
    Firstly, you are stupid!
[00:39] Nag
    Secondly, you are incredibly stupid!
[00:41] Nag
    Thirdly, you are infinitely stupid!
[00:44] Nag
    Fourthly, you are cosmically
    and revolutionarily stupid!
[00:46] Nag
    And fifthly...
[00:47] Robo
    I've heard enough! Die!
[00:53] Nag
    HAYATE!
[01:02] Robo
    Wha?!
[01:06] Hay
    You called, Miss?
[01:08] Nag
    Hayate!
[01:09] Robo
    Wh-Who the hell are you?!
[01:12] Hay
    Who? Me? Well...
[01:14] Nag
    Hurry! The opening sequence
    is about to start!
[01:18] Hay
    What? Oh! Uh, um, I came to
    the Sanzenin household to...
[01:20] Nar
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:24] Nar
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:27] Nar
    A butler is a formal
    guardian, who is there to
[01:30] ---
    support his mistress in
    all aspects of her life.
[01:34] Nar
    Yes!
[01:35] Nar
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:39] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:44] Hay
    Wait, the narration's too early!
[01:46] Hay
    I'm, um...
[01:50] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:50] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:56] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:56] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:03] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:03] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:06] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:06] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:10] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:10] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:15] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:15] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:19] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:19] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:24] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:24] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:27] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:27] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:34] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:34] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:40] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:40] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:43] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:43] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:46] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:46] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:53] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:53] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:59] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:59] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:06] ---
    
[03:18] Hay
    Tell me, Mr. Santa, why
    don't you bring me presents?
[03:23] San
    Ah, that's because your family is poor.
[03:27] Hay
    What?! B-But then, what am I supposed to do?!
[03:31] San
    Work, lad!
[03:32] San
    If a man will not work, he shall not eat!
[03:34] San
    If there's something you want, do something about it yourself.
    
[03:37] Hay
    B-But...
[03:39] San
    But have faith.
[03:41] San
    The one to have the last laugh will surely...
[03:43] ---
    ...be he, who is honest and hard-working.
[03:45] Hay
    Mr. Santa!
[03:46] San
    But well, I'm still not
    bringing you any presents.
[03:49] Hay
    What?! Wait! What's that supposed to mean?!
[03:54] Hay
    Wait a minute!
[03:56] Hay
    Hey!
[03:58] Hay
    That last thing he said bothered me,
[04:00] ---
    but even so, I decided to believe
    in Santa's words and live by them.
[04:05] Hay
    That is, until today!
[04:07] Man
    What are we going to do?!
     Five more minutes!
[04:09] ---
    If we don't get the manuscript
    in five more minutes...!
[04:11] Man
    Oh, this week's edition is doomed!
[04:15] Man
    Please relax!
[04:16] Man
    The fastest bike messenger in the
    industry will be here shortly!
[04:19] Man
    The fastest?
[04:28] Man
    Here he comes! That's him!
[04:30] Hay
    Thank you for waiting!
[04:43] Hay
    I am the bike messenger Hayate Ayasaki
[04:46] Hay
    Your signature, please.
[04:49] ---
    In English, "Unmei" Means "Destiny"
[04:52] Man
    Thank you, fastest bike
    messenger in the industry,
[04:55] ---
    with the tremendously sturdy
    and superhuman body!
[04:58] Man
    But kid, are you really all right?
[05:01] Hay
    Please don't worry.
[05:02] Hay
    I work out.
[05:06] Hay
    Well, then, we look forward
    to being of service again.
[05:09] Man
    Oh, wait, kid!
[05:10] Hay
    I'm fine!
[05:12] Hay
    Really.
[05:13] Man
    No! In front! In front of you!
SIGN    Be Careful You Damn Bicycles
SIGN    Suginami Ward
[05:24] Goro
    Sorry! Are you all right?!
[05:27] Man
    Poor kid. And he's such an admirable boy.
[05:30] Man
    Yes,
[05:30] Man
    that boy is horribly unlucky.
[05:33] Hay
    Ow, that hurt.
[05:35] Hay
    Sheesh.
[05:37] Hay
    And it's Christmas Eve, too.
[05:39] Nar
    Yes! At around this time,
    the boy was still...
[05:42] ---
    ...a totally unremarkable
    high school student,
[05:44] ---
    who attended a totally unremarkable
    public high school.
[05:47] Guys
    Hey there, Hayate.
[05:49] Hay
    Why hello!
[05:50] ---
    My totally unremarkable classmates,
[05:52] ---
    who attend the totally unremarkable
    public high school!
[05:54] Guy
    Well, sorry for being unremarkable.
[05:57] Hay
    So what's up? You're all together.
[05:59] Hay
    Oh, let me guess. A Christmas party?
[06:01] Guy
    Yeah, come if you're not busy.
[06:02] Girl
    I'm really looking forward to the party.
[06:03] Guy
    It's all you can eat and
    drink for just 3000 yen.
[06:03] ---
    Yeah.
[06:04] Girl
    We gotta eat a lot, 3000 yen's worth.
[06:06] ---
    Yeah.
[06:07] Hay
    Uh, but I don't have any money, and
    I'm still working my part-time job.
[06:07] ---
    Better bring your A-game!
[06:09] Guy
    As unsociable as ever, aren't you?
[06:11] Girl
    Hayate, you're athletic,
    so you should join a
[06:14] ---
    sports team at school or something.
[06:15] Hay
    But that would cut into my time for work.
[06:18] Guy
    Darn you! All you talk about is work!
     What are you, money-mad?!
[06:20] Girl
    You can't buy friendship with money!
[06:22] Guy
    Why do you need so much money anyway?
[06:25] Hay
    That's because... uh...
[06:27] Hay
    My parents are unemployed...?
[06:33] Guy
    S-Sorry, I think we got
    kind of carried away there.
[06:36] Guy
    Later!
[06:39] ---
    Yes, for example,
[06:41] ---
    if they were laid off
    because of the bad economy,
[06:44] ---
    there would be some room for sympathy.
[06:46] ---
    However, with Hayate's father...
SIGN    Father
[06:49] Dad
    Yeah! Ever heard of self-realization?!
[06:52] Dad
    I think there's a much more suitable
    job for me out there somewhere!
[06:56] Nar
    With his head in the clouds, he's an
    insanely unproductive member of society.
[06:59] ---
    Mother
[06:59] Mom
    Woohoo! It's not as if I'm
    frittering our money away!
[07:03] Mom
    I'm investing in my dreams!
[07:06] ---
    And his mother also neglects the housework,
[07:09] ---
    throwing away money left and right.
[07:11] Hay
    If a man will not work, he shall not eat!
[07:13] Hay
    But I have faith!
[07:15] Hay
    The one to have the last laugh will surely...
[07:17] ---
    Surely, it'll be he, who's
    honest and hard-working!
[07:21] Man
    Ayasaki, you're fired.
[07:24] Man
    You've been lying about
    your age, haven't you?
[07:26] Man
    I hear you're still in high school.
[07:28] Hay
    H-How did you know that?!
[07:30] Man
    Your parents came by earlier and told me.
[07:34] Man
    I thought you were a serious
    and capable young man.
[07:37] ---
    You let me down.
[07:38] Man
    I turned over the 170,000 yen you
    earned so far this month to them.
[07:42] Hay
    Y-You gave it to them?
[07:44] Hay
    Hand over that kind of
    money to those parents,
[07:46] ---
    and they're bound to fritter it all
    away, investing in their dreams!
[07:50] Man
    That's absurd. What parents would do that?
[07:53] Hay
    My parents! That's why I lied
    about my age to work part-time!
[07:56] Hay
    This can't be happening...
[07:58] Hay
    But even they must know that this
    money need to be spent carefully...
[08:02] Hay
    Dad! Mom!
[08:05] Hay
    Where are my wages?!
[08:07] ---
    Wages
[08:10] Hay
    Thank goodness! They haven't spent it yet!
[08:14] Mom
    Sorry! I tried "investing in my
    dream", but it didn't work out.
[08:17] Mom
    Teehee. Mom.
[08:28] Hay
    H-How are we supposed to make
    it to next year on this?
[08:32] Hay
    We don't even have any savings left.
[08:39] Hay
    To Hayate.
[08:40] Hay
    A Christmas Present for you.
[08:55] Hay
    What's this?
[08:56] Hay
    Ones, tens, hundreds,
    thousands, ten thousands,
[08:58] ---
    hundred thousands, millions,
    ten millions, hundred million?!
[09:01] Hay
    An IOU for 156,804,000 yen?!
[09:04] 2
    We borrowed money from
    some very generous people.
[09:04] ---
    Mother
[09:04] ---
    Father
[09:08] 2
    So, we'll be counting on you to pay it off.
[09:10] Hay
    You idiots!
SIGN    To Hayate Sorry, I got carried away gambling... no real helping it. But well, what's done is done.
[09:12] Mom
    But well, what's done is done.
[09:15] Hay
    D-Don't just brush it off!
[09:16] Dad
    But it'll be tedious to work if off
    and our family has no money left.
[09:20] Mom
    Mommy and Daddy gave it a lot of thought,
    and we came up with a brilliant idea.
[09:24] Hay
    Brilliant idea?
[09:26] 2
    We know!!
    
[09:27] ---
    We'll give Hayate as a present by way of an apology!!!
    
[09:30] ---
    It's Christmas, after all.
[09:31] Hay*
    D-Dad! Mom!
[09:33] Yakuza
    Hey! Mr. Ayasaki, are you here?
[09:37] Yakuza
    We've come for your boy!
[09:43] Hay
    Could it be that you're the
    "very generous people"?
[09:48] Yakuza
    You bet.
[09:49] ---
    We're the "very generous people"
    folk who lent your parents money.
[09:53] Hay
    C-Come on, Mr. Very Generous People,
[09:56] ---
    my parents, who owe you the
    debt, aren't here anymore.
[09:59] Hay
    Besides, there's no way I can
    pay back 156,804,000 yen...
[10:03] ---
    You ain't got nothin' to worry 'bout.
[10:04] ---
    We're pros here, too.
[10:06] ---
    If ya just come with us...
[10:08] ---
    For example, ya could go
    to a tropical paradise
[10:10] ---
    and devote yerself to free volunteer work.
[10:14] ---
    Or ya could find employment
    with a global courier service.
[10:22] ---
    Oh, becomin' a consultant,
[10:25] ---
    who teaches the value of traffic
    etiquette, could be good, too.
[10:33] ---
    Well, we'll be able to help
    ya out in a lotta ways.
[10:44] ---
    Hey! Hold it right there, sonny boy!
[10:50] Hay
    I've managed to get away somehow, but...
[10:52] Hay
    I never thought they'd go so far.
[10:54] ---
    My parents are unbelievable.
[11:01] Hay
    No matter how many times I look at it,
    I guess it's still 156,804,000 yen.
[11:08] Hay
    I guess I've been abandoned for real.
[11:13] San
    But have faith.
[11:15] San
    The one to have the last laugh will surely...
[11:19] Hay
    NO!
[11:21] Hay
    In the end, it's the dishonest
    guys who win in this world!
[11:24] Hay
    There's nothing to gain from
    working hard at honest jobs!
[11:28] Hay
    Nello from "A Dog of Flanders" stayed
    a nice guy and he wound up dead!
[11:32] Nag
    What is wrong with this machine?!
[11:33] Nag
    Does it not take credit cards?!
[11:43] Nar
    It was the fateful encounter of boy and girl.
[11:51] Hay
    Hayate the Combat Butler
    (Hayate no Gotoku)
[11:56] Nag
    Christmas.
    (Kurisumasu)
[11:58] Yakuza
    We lost him.
[11:59] Yakuza
    Spry kid, that one.
[12:01] Yakuza
    Find him, even if you have to
    search every nook and cranny.
[12:05] Yakuza
    And you two, this isn't
    even close to being enough.
[12:08] Yakuza
    If you don't bring it all by tomorrow,
    you know what's coming, right?!
[12:11] Guys
    Y-Yes, sir!
[12:14] Hay
    Debt collectors of their kind...
    They'll never let me get away, no matter what.
[12:19] ---
    That's exactly right.
[12:22] ---
    You're finished!
[12:23] ---
    Don't fight it, just turn
    yourself over to those guys...
[12:25] ---
    O Hayate, you mustn't ever give up.
[12:27] ---
    You were born a man and thus,
[12:29] ---
    you must continue to strive to the very end.
[12:31] ---
    Hah! What the hell can he do now?
[12:34] ---
    Let us kidnap that girl.
[12:35] ---
    Huh?
[12:36] ---
    We shall kidnap her and gratefully
    accept 150 million yen in ransom.
[12:41] ---
    Good idea.
[12:42] ---
    H-Hey, don't you think that's a bad
    idea, no matter what the situation?
[12:45] ---
    But my very life's in danger because
    of those worthless parents of mine!
[12:48] ---
    That is right. A modicum of
    villainy should be permitted.
[12:51] ---
    No, it ought to be permitted!
[12:53] ---
    Don't do it!
[12:54] ---
    Even Nello and Patrasche are
    surely in Heaven right now,
[12:56] ---
    exhorting you to avenge them.
[12:58] ---
    Yeah, and even if I get caught, I'll
    have warm meals and a bed in prison.
[13:02] ---
    See here! Do not touch me!
[13:04] ---
    Hey, hey, you're cute!
[13:06] ---
    All alone on the night of Christmas Eve?
[13:09] ---
    Come someplace fun with us.
[13:17] ---
    Don't go hitting on girls on the
    anniversary of Nello's death!
[13:19] ---
    Go look at a Rubens painting
    and observe it in mourning!
[13:22] ---
    You fools!
[13:23] ---
    H-Hey...
[13:24] ---
    I've never even been hit by my dad!
[13:28] ---
    Sorry about that!
[13:32] ---
    Sh-Shoot, I automatically leapt
    out at them without thinking...
[13:35] ---
    Thank you.
[13:43] ---
    I don't really get it, but you saved me.
[13:48] ---
    By the way, do you understand how this works?
[13:51] ---
    Huh?
[13:51] ---
    Warm
[13:52] ---
    I want this thing labeled "warm",
[13:53] ---
    but it will not come out,
    even when I press the button.
[13:56] ---
    Well, you need to put in a
    100 yen coin or something...
[13:59] ---
    Without this "warm" thing,
    I will freeze to death!
[14:16] ---
    It's not good for a girl to
    catch a chill, so wear that.
[14:20] ---
    What a cheap-looking coat.
[14:22] ---
    The craftsmanship is shoddy
    and the fabric is heavy.
[14:24] ---
    On top of which, it's too baggy for me.
[14:27] ---
    But it's warm. I like it.
[14:31] ---
    Yes, I shall do something for you
    in thanks for this "warm" thing.
[14:35] ---
    In thanks?
[14:36] ---
    It can be anything. Just name it.
[14:38] ---
    Anything... Really?
[14:41] ---
    Yes!
[14:45] ---
    I know! Since it's come to this,
    I have no choice but to go for it!
[14:48] ---
    In that moment, the boy found his resolve.
[14:50] ---
    In thanks for his help, he would ask her...
[14:53] ---
    ...to be his hostage, so
    he could demand ransom.
[14:55] ---
    Then I'll get straight to the point.
[14:57] ---
    Sure, sure.
[14:59] ---
    Won't you go with me?
[15:00] ---
    What?
[15:03] ---
    I want you!
[15:05] ---
    His questionable choice of words...
[15:07] ---
    ...was to thoroughly complicate
    their relationship!
[15:10] ---
    Idio... It may be Christmas Eve, but
    to make a sudden confession like that?!
[15:13] ---
    D-Do you know exactly what it
    is that you're asking here?!
[15:18] ---
    I could never joke about something like this.
[15:21] ---
    This is life or death.
[15:23] ---
    From the moment I first
    laid eyes on you, I...
[15:25] ---
    I decided that I would take you away with me!
[15:27] ---
    His earnestness is conveyed.
[15:29] ---
    However, whether it is
    conveyed accurately or not...
[15:32] ---
    ...is a different story.
[15:34] ---
    A-All right.
[15:36] ---
    But in exchange...
[15:38] ---
    Absolutely no cheating or anything, got it?!
[15:40] ---
    Huh? Uh...
[15:43] ---
    Sure.
[15:45] ---
    Cheating?
[15:46] ---
    Well, whatever.
[15:47] ---
    Then, would you tell me your
    guardian's phone number?
[15:51] ---
    Okay.
[15:52] ---
    Then wait here for a sec.
[15:56] ---
    My heart's still pounding.
[15:58] ---
    But that boy is strong and kind.
[16:01] ---
    He's just so cool!
[16:08] ---
    To Hayate
[16:08] ---
    Hayate... Is that his name?
[16:13] ---
    Haya...
[16:18] ---
    Now, to make an anonymous ransom demand.
[16:23] ---
    No one can stop me now!
[16:28] ---
    Yes, hello?
[16:30] ---
    Oh, hello? This is Ayasaki.
[16:33] ---
    What's a kidnapper doing introducing himself?
[16:36] ---
    It's over. My perfect plan...
[16:40] ---
    And it hadn't even begun.
[16:51] ---
    Daddy, Mommy, why isn't he wearing
    a coat when it's so cold out?
[16:55] ---
    Shh!
[16:57] Hay
    Yeah, in the end, this is pretty
    much how it goes for me.
[17:00] Hay
    Whether I try to do honest
    work or commit a crime,
[17:03] ---
    it's never going to work out.
[17:05] Hay
    I feel so tired somehow.
[17:10] Hay
    If I just fell asleep now, would I die?
[17:13] Hay
    But that'd be fine, too.
[17:14] ---
    There's nothing but pain, even
    if I were to stay alive...
[17:17] Hay
    No one would care if I died anyway...
[17:22] Mar
    Are you all right?
[17:35] Mar
    This is terrible! You're so cold!
[17:53] Mar
    You will catch a cold if you sleep out here.
[17:58] Nar
    He was blindsided.
[18:00] ---
    This kind smile...
[18:02] ---
    To the boy's heart, frozen
    in life's pit of despair,
[18:05] ---
    it apparently made quite an impact.
[18:14] Mar
    What? Um, wait...
[18:16] Hay
    Patrasche, I was wrong.
[18:18] Hay
    There are incredibly kind people
    in this world, like her.
[18:21] Hay
    And yet, I was going to do something
    foolish like kidnapping...
[18:24] Nag
    What are you doing?!
[18:25] Guys
    Don't make a fuss!
[18:27] Hay
    That's right! What am I doing?!
[18:29] Guy
    Quit dragging your feet!
[18:30] Nag
    Hey!
[18:32] Guy
    Get in there already!
[18:35] Hay
    What?
[18:36] Mar
    Oh, dear! That child! She's
    getting kidnapped again!
[18:40] Hay
    Are you an acquaintance of hers?
[18:42] Mar
    Yes. What shall I do? And
    Himegami isn't here, either.
[18:46] Hay
    I'm going to borrow this.
[18:49] Hay
    You call the police.
[18:52] Hay
    I will rescue her!
[18:54] Mar
    Rescue her? But they're in a car!
[19:00] Nar
    That's right! This anime will
    never condone brutal crimes!
[19:05] Nar
    Kidnapping is not cool!
[19:07] Guy
    All right, the kidnapping's a success!
[19:10] Guy
    Now, we'll be able to rustle up a
    fat ransom and pay off our debt!
[19:13] Nag
    Hey, you two idiots.
[19:16] Nag
    You're polluting the air, so would
    you do me a favor and stop breathing?
[19:19] Nag
    You're destroying the environment.
[19:21] Nag
    You have to take good care of Earth.
[19:22] Guy
    Y-You damn brat!
[19:24] Guy
    If you make us mad...
[19:25] Nag
    I told you not to breathe, didn't I, baldy?!
[19:29] Guy
    You keep that up and you're
    seriously gonna get hurt!
[19:33] Nag
    Stay away from me, pervert!
[19:34] Nag
    Come any closer and I'm
    calling for help, you fool!
[19:38] Guy
    You're the fool, little girl!
[19:40] Guy
    You think there's anyone who can
    catch up to a car going this fast?!
[19:43] Nag
    Sure there is!
[19:44] Nag
    He said he would risk his
    life to take me away!
[19:46] Nag
    So if I call for him, he'll come!
[19:48] Guy
    Then why don't you try calling
    him right this minute?
[19:54] Nag
    HAYATE!
[20:04] Guys
    What?!
[20:06] Nag
    Hayate...
[20:17] Hay
    You scoundrels! Give that
    girl back without a fuss!
[20:22] Guy
    B-Bro!
[20:23] Guy
    Shuddup! H-He suddenly jumped in front of me!
[20:26] Nag
    How dare you two...!
[20:30] Hay
    Would you please return that girl to me?
[20:33] 2
    Y-Yes, sir!
[20:37] Nag
    Hayate!
[20:41] Cop
    Hey, shut up and walk.
[20:41] Cop
    What the hell was that guy?
[20:43] ---
    Come on.
[20:44] Nag
    Hey, are you all right?
[20:46] Hay
    Please don't worry. I work out.
[20:49] Hay
    I'm really glad that you're all right.
[20:52] Nag
    It seems I must thank you again.
[20:54] Hay
    You don't have to thank me.
[20:56] Hay
    I very nearly...
[20:58] Nag
    Huh? What is it? No need to hold back.
[21:00] ---
    Tell me whatever you want.
[21:02] Hay
    Then, this time, could you
    maybe find me... a new job...
[21:07] Nag
    H-Hey!
[21:08] Nag
    A-Are you really all right?!
[21:11] Nag
    There's some kind of red
    liquid coming out of you!
[21:13] Hay
    This is nothing... Just a bit too
    much to put on the airwaves...
[21:16] ---
    These scrapes on my head,
    abdomen, and four limbs...
[21:19] Nag
    Hayate!
[21:20] Nag
    Hey, Hayate!
[21:23] Mar
    Nagi!
[21:24] Nag
    Ah! Maria!
[21:25] Nag
    Perfect timing! We need to treat him quickly!
[21:27] Mar
    I did contact Mr. Klaus and
    ask him to come pick us up...
[21:31] Mar
    But this is...
[21:33] Mar
    Where in the world did
    you get that shabby coat?
[21:36] Nag
    Uh, this is certainly a
    pitifully cheaply-made coat,
[21:39] Nag
    but it's a coat that my savior
    was kind enough to give to me.
[21:42] Nag
    I would disgrace the Sanzenin name
    if I didn't wear it with care, right?
[21:45] Mar
    Your... savior?
[21:48] Nag
    That reminds me! We had yet to find
    a replacement for Himegami, right?
[21:51] Nag
    Let's make it him!
[21:52] Mar
    Pardon?
[21:53] Cop
    We'll transport the injured in this car!
[21:56] Nag
    No need! Everything is taken care of!
[22:01] Nag
    I promised that I would find him a new job.
[22:04] Nag
    And I owe him.
[22:05] Nag
    So I will make him Nagi
    Sanzenin's new butler!
[22:10] Nar
    Yes, it was truly a fateful encounter.
[22:14] Nar
    As of this night, the boy's fate
    begins to change greatly, but...
[22:18] Nar
    Check back with us for more details.
[22:20] Nar
    We will continue to fight the broadcast
    regulations again next time!
[22:26] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[22:26] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[22:32] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[22:32] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:36] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:36] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:42] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:42] ---
    I will take from you
[22:47] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:47] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:52] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:52] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:57] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:57] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[23:03] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[23:03] ---
    Go by emptily
[23:08] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[23:08] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[23:13] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[23:13] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[23:18] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[23:18] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[23:24] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[23:24] ---
    I sought it out
[23:29] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[23:29] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:34] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:34] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:39] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:39] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:44] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:44] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:48] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:48] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[24:00] ---
    Preview
[24:01] ---
    Hayate, you were looking
    for live-in work, right?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:04] ---
    Y-Yes.
[24:05] ---
    Then why don't you work as
    my butler at this house?
[24:07] ---
    B-But Hayate doesn't even
    know what a butler does...
[24:10] ---
    I'll do it! No matter what happens,
[24:12] ---
    I, Hayate Ayasaki, will put my life
    on the line and protect you, Miss!
[24:15] ---
    What am I going to do with
    these two clueless people?
[24:18] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:19] ---
    "A New Beginning with
    Nagi Sanzenin's Estate"!
[24:22] ---
    So we finally meet again, sonny boy.
[24:22] ---
    A New Beginning with
    Nagi Sanzenin's Estate
[24:24] ---
    Frankly, the next episode's
    going to be funny-cool, too!
[24:40] ---
    Please watch "Hayate the Combat
    Butler" again next time.

2 - A New Beginning with Nagi Sanzenin's Estate

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:09] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    It was a Christmas present!
[00:12] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, a totally
    unremarkable high school student,
[00:15] ---
    found that his parents had very
    considerately made arrangements
[00:19] ---
    to have him taken in by some
    "very generous people" folk!
[00:22] ---
    However, he has a fateful
    encounter in the park!
[00:28] ---
    I don't really get it, but you saved me.
[00:34] ---
    You scoundrels! Give that
    girl back without a fuss!
[00:40] ---
    I will make him Nagi Sanzenin's new butler!
[00:45] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:49] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:52] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[00:55] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[00:59] ---
    Yes!
[01:00] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:04] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:08] ---
    I will make him Nagi Sanzenin's new butler!
[01:11] ---
    Why did you just repeat yourself?
[01:14] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:14] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:21] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:21] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:28] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:28] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:31] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:31] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:35] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:35] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:40] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:40] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:44] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:44] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:49] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:49] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:52] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:52] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[01:59] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[01:59] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:05] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:05] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:08] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:08] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:11] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:11] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:18] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:18] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:24] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:24] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:45] ---
    A New Beginning with Nagi Sanzenin's Estate
[02:54] ---
    Huh? Where am I?
[02:56] ---
    Are you done already?
[02:58] ---
    Are you done with your life already?
[03:01] ---
    P-Please, Mr. Santa, you're
    talking as if I'm dead...
[03:05] ---
    You did die.
[03:06] ---
    What?
[03:07] ---
    You were a bright red spectacle,
    which couldn't be shown on TV.
[03:14] ---
    I see.
[03:15] ---
    But if that's the case,
    I guess I'm done then.
[03:18] ---
    I don't have family who would mourn me anyway
[03:21] ---
    and there's no home for
    me to go back to, either.
[03:23] ---
    Oh-ho...
[03:25] ---
    Pretending like you're a tragic hero,
    when you're a despicable kidnapper?
[03:29] ---
    And while it may have
    been in your imagination,
[03:31] ---
    you hit me in the last episode, too.
[03:34] ---
    Don't you forget.
[03:35] ---
    It may have been a failed attempt,
[03:37] ---
    but what you did was more than
    enough to charge you as a criminal.
[03:41] ---
    I-I apologize! I apologize! I
    feel bad about it! I'm sorry!
[03:45] ---
    I'm... sorry...
[03:49] ---
    Huh? Where am I?
[04:01] ---
    All this luxury... Gotta be
    impossible in this world, right?
[04:06] ---
    Which means, this has
    to be Heaven, after all.
[04:08] ---
    Or possibly, because I was poor...
[04:10] ---
    Yes, it must be a vision,
    a near-death experience,
[04:13] ---
    created by my subconscious!
[04:15] ---
    Thank you, Mr. Santa!
[04:17] ---
    I'm going to enjoy this to the fullest!
[04:19] ---
    Our protagonist's a dumb guy. Sorry.
[04:22] ---
    Well, he certainly did
    hit his head pretty hard,
[04:26] ---
    but his life is not in any danger.
[04:28] ---
    Likely, he works out on a regular basis.
[04:32] ---
    Well, if anything else comes
    up, please let me know.
[04:37] ---
    Maria, I'm thinking of making that boy...
[04:40] ---
    Making Hayate the replacement for Himegami.
[04:43] ---
    What? Um, I'm not sure I follow...
[04:45] ---
    Well, partially, because that's
    what my savior requested, but...
[04:49] ---
    How do I put this? That is..
[04:51] ---
    He confessed having feelings
    for me in the park.
[04:53] ---
    Very passionately...
[04:55] ---
    He said something about
    wanting to take me away...
[04:57] ---
    I-I see...
[04:59] ---
    At any rate, call me right
    away when Hayate wakes up.
[05:02] ---
    I'm counting on you!
[05:04] ---
    What could be going on here?
[05:06] ---
    This will require verification
    on a number of counts...
[05:09] ---
    But before I do that...
[05:11] ---
    Great Bath
[05:13] ---
    Well, well! That's my dream for you!
[05:16] ---
    This is luxury, the likes of which
    I never even saw in my lifetime!
[05:22] ---
    But if this is Heaven, dying isn't so bad.
[05:26] ---
    Though, being all by myself
    is a little lonely.
[05:35] ---
    Th-The water's fine, isn't it?
[05:37] ---
    R-Relaxing, isn't it?
[05:39] ---
    What's relaxing got to do with anything?
[05:41] ---
    Is this really a dream?
[05:43] ---
    Wh-What's that scarf girl doing here?
[05:46] ---
    Um...
[05:47] ---
    Y-Yes?
[05:48] ---
    You really must be physically tough...
[05:51] ---
    Huh?
[05:52] ---
    I mean, your life may not be in
    danger, but to be taking a bath...
[05:56] ---
    Normally, your wounds would reopen.
[06:00] ---
    The bath was dyed!
[06:02] ---
    It was dyed by the bright red bath elixir
[06:04] ---
    that burst forth from Hayate's body!
[06:06] ---
    Please get a hold of yourself!
    Are you all right?!
[06:13] ---
    Oh, a shooting star!
[06:18] ---
    Wait, no, no!
[06:20] ---
    We're not even done with
    half of the first part!
[06:23] ---
    Here's a fan service scene as an apology!
[06:30] ---
    Are you awake, Hayate Ayasaki?
[06:35] ---
    You were in the bath earlier...
[06:36] ---
    The whole time!
[06:37] ---
    You've been asleep the whole time
    since you were brought here,
[06:39] ---
    but are you all right?
[06:41] ---
    I was asleep the whole time?
[06:43] ---
    Of course! You were asleep the whole time!
[06:45] ---
    I see.
[06:47] ---
    Then I guess that really was a dream.
[06:52] ---
    Oh, but... How did you know my name already?
[06:56] ---
    Or rather, where am I?
[06:58] ---
    Well...
[07:01] ---
    This is the Sanzenin estate belonging
    to Miss Nagi, whom you saved.
[07:07] ---
    I... saved?
[07:09] ---
    Th-That girl?!
[07:11] ---
    And I am someone who looks after her.
[07:14] ---
    My name is Maria.
[07:16] ---
    And, I felt bad about it,
    but I looked at this.
[07:22] ---
    You seem to be in quite a terrible situation.
[07:24] ---
    N-No, it's not that big a deal...
[07:27] ---
    By the way, I'd like to
    ask you about something.
[07:31] ---
    That is... About the incident
    concerning the Miss at the park...
[07:34] ---
    Sh-She knows?!
[07:36] ---
    You apparently said something
    about taking her away?
[07:39] ---
    Um, that is... I-I apologize!
[07:42] ---
    I'll never think of kidnapping anyone again!
[07:44] ---
    What?
[07:45] ---
    Huh?
[07:47] ---
    I see.
[07:49] ---
    I understand the general
    gist of your situation.
[07:51] ---
    So um... I don't know how I
    should make up for that...
[07:55] ---
    Oh, but well, people do lie out
    of necessity sometimes, so...
[08:01] ---
    Ah! What's this? Awake already?
[08:03] ---
    How are you feeling?
[08:05] ---
    Y-Yes, I'm fine now.
[08:07] ---
    Thank you very much for being so good to me.
[08:10] ---
    But I'm sorry.
[08:11] ---
    I asked for such a crazy
    favor of you in the park.
[08:14] ---
    Out of a desire for 156,804,000
    yen of ransom money.
[08:20] ---
    Well, it surprised me, but...
[08:22] ---
    That is... I didn't find it unpleasant.
[08:24] ---
    It was her very first romantic
    confession, after all.
[08:25] ---
    Even though it's a misunderstanding.
[08:28] ---
    It's only that, we don't
    know each other very well,
[08:31] ---
    so I don't think it's good
    to rush into things...
[08:36] ---
    S-So I gave it some thought after that!
[08:38] ---
    You were looking for live-in work, right?
[08:41] ---
    What?
[08:42] ---
    Then why don't you work as
    my butler at this house?
[08:45] ---
    Wow...
[08:47] ---
    A butler?
[08:48] ---
    Uh, um, Miss? Perhaps you
    should make such offers...
[08:51] ---
    ...only after you have a good
    grasp of his circumstances...
[08:53] ---
    But we do need a replacement for Himegami.
[08:56] ---
    Besides, Hayate is certifiably tough.
[08:59] ---
    See, even after a car went
    "wham!" and ran into him,
[09:02] ---
    he was still alive and kicking!
[09:03] ---
    I-I tried to kidnap her, but
    not only is she forgiving me,
[09:05] ---
    she's even offering me live-in work?
[09:07] ---
    What a... What a kindhearted little kid.
[09:11] ---
    Thank you, Mr. Santa.
[09:13] ---
    So this is the very first present
    you've given me, isn't it?
[09:16] ---
    Uh, i-it's not really like that...
[09:19] ---
    B-But Hayate doesn't even
    know what a butler does...
[09:22] ---
    I'll do it!
[09:23] ---
    What?
[09:23] ---
    Please leave it to me, Miss!
[09:26] ---
    No matter what happens,
[09:27] ---
    I, Hayate Ayasaki, will put my life
    on the line and protect you, Miss!
[09:30] ---
    Y-You fool! Do not say such embarrassing
    things in front of Maria!
[09:41] ---
    Wh-What am I going to do with these
    two clueless people? Honestly!
[09:47] ---
    What did you say? A new butler?
[09:50] ---
    Certainly, as the head butler, I would
    like a replacement for Himegami, but...
[09:55] ---
    What kind of person is this
    boy named Hayate Ayasaki?
[09:59] ---
    Well, let me think...
[10:02] ---
    He's the kind of boy who can ride a bicycle
[10:05] ---
    and catch up to a car
    careening along at 120 km/h
[10:06] ---
    and then be perfectly fine when
    he gets run over like trash.
[10:10] ---
    Maria, what Gundam is this?
[10:13] ---
    That's the kind of toughness
    you see in giant robots.
[10:15] ---
    No, Mr. Klaus, he's still technically human.
[10:18] ---
    Besides, Gundams aren't giant
    robots, they're mobi...
[10:20] ---
    I-I see, so Gundams aren't giant robots.
[10:24] ---
    I have been studying anime night and day
[10:26] ---
    to be on the same wavelength
    as the Miss, but...
[10:29] ---
    It was but a youthful mistake.
[10:31] ---
    You seem to have quite a good
    grasp of the subject, though...
[10:34] ---
    So, what about the matter concerning Hayate?
[10:36] ---
    At any rate, such a person cannot
    serve as a butler in this household.
[10:40] ---
    Send him home.
[10:42] ---
    But you see...
[10:43] ---
    Please take care of it.
[10:48] ---
    Wow!
[10:52] ---
    How is the size?
[10:53] ---
    Yes, it's perfect.
[10:55] ---
    I'm glad to hear that.
[10:57] ---
    It was worth my time to make the
    alterations last night then.
[10:59] ---
    What? You did this?
[11:02] ---
    Then, shall we get to work?
[11:04] ---
    Y-Yes!
[11:06] ---
    Um, so... What will I be doing?
[11:10] ---
    Hmm, let me think.
[11:12] ---
    It's the end of the year,
[11:14] ---
    so I suppose the first priority
    is thorough cleaning.
[11:16] ---
    Mr. Klaus told me to send him away,
[11:19] ---
    but that would be somewhat
    heartless, wouldn't it...?
[11:23] ---
    Cleaning, huh?
[11:24] ---
    Even I can do that much.
[11:26] ---
    If I get fired from this job,
[11:27] ---
    I won't be able to pay
    back the 156,804,000 yen.
[11:30] ---
    Nor will I have a place to live.
[11:32] ---
    That's right. My new life is
    going to begin, here, today!
[11:36] ---
    Yes, as a butler of the Sanzenin household.
[11:39] ---
    Don't steal other people's lines.
[11:41] ---
    Commercial break.
[11:46] ---
    I love you.
    (Suki)
[11:51] ---
    I hate you.
    (Kirai*)
[11:53] ---
    That's right. My new life is
    going to begin, here, today!
[11:57] ---
    As a butler of the Sanzenin household!
[11:59] ---
    I got to say it myself this time!
[12:03] ---
    Oh, Nagi, good morning.
[12:06] ---
    Ah, you two. Morning.
[12:09] ---
    Please take a look, Miss!
[12:10] ---
    Maria made alterations to this outfit for me!
[12:16] ---
    Well, see that you work hard.
[12:19] ---
    I-I feel like she suddenly
    became cold towards me...
[12:22] ---
    Oh, I don't know. If anything,
    I feel like she's too fired up.
[12:27] ---
    Well, whatever the case,
[12:28] ---
    I will regain the Miss's trust with my work!
[12:31] ---
    What? Uh, um...
[12:34] ---
    Look at that enthusiasm.
[12:35] ---
    I was told to send him away, but...
[12:37] ---
    And how should I clear up the
    misunderstanding with Nagi?
[12:44] ---
    My attitude earlier wasn't good.
[12:46] ---
    That was just too petty of me.
[12:50] ---
    If only I could do needlework like Maria!
[12:54] ---
    What do you think, Hayate?
[12:56] ---
    It's incredible, Miss!
[12:58] ---
    Hayate...
[12:59] ---
    Miss...
[13:04] ---
    Miss.
[13:06] ---
    Miss!
[13:08] ---
    Ah, Maria. Where's Hayate?
[13:10] ---
    He's helping out with the cleaning.
[13:13] ---
    He is brimming with enthusiasm.
[13:16] ---
    I-I see.
[13:17] ---
    He is apparently going to
    work hard to gain your trust.
[13:21] ---
    If you have something on your mind,
[13:22] ---
    perhaps you should speak with him in person.
[13:25] ---
    Y-You're right!
[13:26] ---
    It's important to start by talking
    to each other a lot, right?!
[13:29] ---
    Yes.
[13:31] ---
    I'm going to go see Hayate for a bit!
[13:34] ---
    Go and gently clear up
    the misunderstanding now!
[13:39] ---
    Maria, I'd like you to check my work.
[13:44] ---
    Oh... Is something the matter?
[13:46] ---
    No, just thinking that you two
    are thoroughly out of synch.
[13:54] ---
    Somehow...
[13:56] ---
    ...everything looks really clean.
[13:58] ---
    Does it? Thank you very much.
[14:03] ---
    Very meticulous, even down
    to the small details...
[14:06] ---
    What's this?
[14:07] ---
    Oh, that knob was made of silver, so
    I polished it with a silver duster.
[14:13] ---
    For this bronze bust, I got the
    grime off with a brass brush,
[14:16] ---
    then washed it with a mild neutral detergent.
[14:18] ---
    After getting rid of the moisture,
    I applied a finishing coat of wax.
[14:20] ---
    The carpeting was woolen kilim,
[14:23] ---
    so instead of hot water, I added
    some shampoo to cold water and...
[14:26] ---
    Wait, um, did I do something wrong?
[14:28] ---
    No, I'm honestly surprised.
[14:31] ---
    Or rather, I'm impressed.
[14:33] ---
    Well, I've been lying about
    my age since I was 8,
[14:36] ---
    working part-time cleaning jobs
    to pay for my parents' booze bill.
[14:39] ---
    So cleaning is actually a specialty of mine!
[14:47] ---
    Mr. Klaus, I'm sorry.
[14:49] ---
    There is no reason we
    should send Hayate away.
[14:52] ---
    In a way, it seems Nagi's judgment
    of his character was right.
[14:56] ---
    But this estate sure is huge!
[14:59] ---
    I wonder how many rooms there are to clean.
[15:03] ---
    Study
[15:05] ---
    The study?
[15:09] ---
    Oh? This room feels pretty lived in.
[15:16] ---
    Notebook
    Nagi
[15:17] ---
    What's this?
[15:18] ---
    The Miss's school notebook, maybe?
[15:23] ---
    Wha?!
[15:24] ---
    Th-This is...!
[15:28] ---
    A picture diary?
[15:29] ---
    It's a manga.
[15:30] ---
    N-No, no, I mustn't look
    at anything so private.
[15:33] ---
    Hey!
[15:35] ---
    What are you looking at in
    my room without permission?!
[15:38] ---
    M-Miss! No, th-this is... well...
[15:42] ---
    Th-That is my...
[15:43] ---
    P-Please don't worry! I hardly read
    any of it! Hardly any of your...
[15:46] ---
    ...picture diary!
[15:49] ---
    Pi... Pi... Picture diary?!
[15:51] ---
    You idiot!
[15:53] ---
    What? Miss?
[15:55] ---
    Shut up! See if I care about you ever again!
[15:58] ---
    You don't even know what I'm feeling!
    Hayate, you idiot! Idiot, idiot, idiot!
[16:01] ---
    Miss...
[16:03] ---
    Just get out!
[16:08] ---
    Rear
[16:08] ---
    Rear
[16:12] ---
    Farewell, my tranquil life.
[16:14] ---
    It was short-lived, but thank you.
[16:16] ---
    Rear
[16:16] ---
    Rear
[16:16] ---
    Sanzenin
[16:22] ---
    So we finally meet again...
[16:25] ---
    ...sonny boy.
[16:26] ---
    Oh, hello there...
[16:35] ---
    Take that! And that!
[16:39] ---
    Are you sure about this?
[16:40] ---
    Huh? About what?
[16:42] ---
    Hayate has really left...
[16:44] ---
    In a black pumpkin carriage...
[16:46] ---
    Huh?
[16:51] ---
    Wh-What?!
[16:54] ---
    The End
[16:55] ---
    H-Hey! The second half
    isn't over yet, either!
[16:59] ---
    Indeed.
[17:01] ---
    Are you all right with leaving it like this?
[17:03] ---
    I-I only told him to get out of my room.
[17:06] ---
    I never thought he would leave the estate...
[17:08] ---
    It's because you don't put
    away your precious possessions
[17:11] ---
    that things like this happen.
[17:13] ---
    It cannot be helped.
[17:15] ---
    Let us just forget about Hayate.
[17:18] ---
    If you are through with him, Miss,
[17:20] ---
    there's no longer any
    reason to keep him here.
[17:22] ---
    That's... well...
[17:24] ---
    If you've grown to hate Hayate, maybe
    this is actually for the better.
[17:28] ---
    No, I mean, it's not like I hate him...
[17:30] ---
    It's not?
[17:31] ---
    Well, regardless, Hayate saved my life.
[17:34] ---
    Forsaking one's savior...
[17:36] ---
    ...is something I can never do as
    a member of the Sanzenin family.
[17:44] ---
    Um, Mr. Very Generous People,
    sirs, just where are we?
[17:49] ---
    The emigration desk.
[17:49] ---
    Wharf Warehouse
[17:51] ---
    Huh?
[17:52] ---
    Oh, I'm so happy! I've got unpaid
    volunteer work to look forward to!
[17:56] ---
    I'm never coming back to Japan again!
[17:58] ---
    Rather, we won't be able to come back.
[18:00] ---
    Wh-What should I do?! At this
    rate, my fate will be...
[18:03] ---
    Man
[18:04] ---
    First, off on a cruise with
    everyone else on a luxury liner!
[18:09] ---
    But during our voyage, we'll
    be attacked by pirates,
[18:12] ---
    and for some reason, I'll
    be recruited to join them!
[18:14] ---
    After becoming a wanted man,
[18:15] ---
    I'll ultimately be cornered by sea monkeys,
[18:17] ---
    my dreams of becoming the
    Pirate King will end in vain,
[18:19] ---
    and I'll end up dying in
    the grand cross-shaped sea!
[18:22] ---
    Um, I just remembered something I have to do.
[18:25] ---
    Eh?
[18:27] ---
    L-Let go!
[18:28] ---
    Don't you worry.
[18:30] ---
    We've got a luxury liner all lined up, too.
[18:36] ---
    S-Someone, help!
[18:44] ---
    Bro!
SIGN    Can't show you!
[18:48] ---
    That hurts!
[18:49] ---
    Bro, a-anything but blood!
[18:49] ---
    Want me to save you?
[18:50] ---
    Please hang in there!
[18:51] ---
    That voice... Could it be...?
[18:51] ---
    We can't put this on TV!
[18:57] ---
    Miss...
[18:58] ---
    WRONG!
[18:59] ---
    My name is Na...
[18:59] ---
    Can't show you!
[19:01] ---
    Uh, no, wrong. Um... Masked... Mask...
[19:03] ---
    Right! Mask the Money!
[19:05] ---
    I came here at the request
    of some girl named Nagi.
[19:08] ---
    R-Right...
[19:10] ---
    So I have a message for you from her.
[19:12] ---
    Well, she said, "S-Sorry for
    yelling at you earlier."
[19:16] ---
    And that was, um...
[19:18] ---
    Hayate, she wanted you to know that!
[19:24] ---
    A-Also, the contents of
    the notebook you saw...
[19:27] ---
    ...is something she considers a masterpiece,
[19:28] ---
    a manga called "End of the Century
    Legend – Magical Destroy" and...
[19:32] ---
    I-It is by no means a picture diary!
[19:34] ---
    Y-Yes, I understand.
[19:36] ---
    Um, Mask the Money.
[19:39] ---
    Good! If you understand,
[19:41] ---
    then please continue
    working as a butler there.
[19:43] ---
    That will make her happy, too... I think.
[19:48] ---
    I will.
[19:48] ---
    There's no way that's gonna happen.
[19:51] ---
    This guy's got a 156,804,000 yen
    debt that his parents left him!
[19:56] ---
    He's got to pay it all back.
[19:58] ---
    Are you referring to this?
[20:00] ---
    What of this scrap of paper?
[20:02] ---
    I told you to shut up! Didn't
    you hear me, you baldy?!
[20:05] ---
    You damn brat...
[20:14] ---
    D-Don't you lay a single finger on her!
[20:19] ---
    You sound so high and mighty.
[20:20] ---
    Then let's see you repay the
    156,804,000 yen in full this minute!
[20:25] ---
    I'll do that.
[20:28] ---
    Repaid in full.
[20:35] ---
    No way!
[20:36] ---
    Is that all real...?
[20:38] ---
    Of course, you fool!
[20:39] ---
    We don't have a problem anymore, do we?
[20:48] ---
    Bro.
[20:49] ---
    All right, we're out of here.
[20:53] ---
    Now, you just have to
    get him to pay you back.
[21:01] ---
    Mask the Money.
[21:04] ---
    When you see the Miss, please let her know.
[21:06] ---
    That I will work to repay her, without fail.
[21:08] ---
    And also, that I look forward
    to continue being her butler.
[21:13] ---
    But she meant that money
    as a free gift to you.
[21:16] ---
    I-I couldn't possibly! I'd feel bad
    if I don't work to pay her back!
[21:20] ---
    Especially when she came to my
    rescue in a silly mask like that.
[21:23] ---
    Needless to say, the girl
    thought it looked cool!
[21:26] ---
    So, that money...
[21:27] ---
    You will work to pay it back!
[21:30] ---
    Debts really should be kept clear
    or it won't be good for justice!
[21:34] ---
    So you work like a pack horse
[21:37] ---
    and repay every last yen to
    your lender, Nagi Sanzenin!
[21:41] ---
    Uh, yes, of course.
[21:43] ---
    I am never... NEVER letting you
    off the hook for a single yen!
[21:47] ---
    Humph!
[21:50] ---
    Your mask's fallen off, Mask the Money!
[21:53] ---
    Wh-Wh-Wh-What?!
[21:54] ---
    They appear to have begun fighting.
[21:56] ---
    D-D-D-Do not look at me!
[21:57] ---
    Oh, r-right.
[21:57] ---
    I think that's all right, though.
[21:58] ---
    Don't look yet!
[21:58] ---
    I understand.
[22:00] ---
    They're like brother and sister.
[22:00] ---
    Do you really understand?!
[22:01] ---
    You really haven't looked, right?!
[22:02] ---
    Don't look!
[22:03] ---
    I apologize!
[22:07] ---
    It's snowing.
[22:09] ---
    And thus, their Christmas came to an end.
[22:13] ---
    However, spring is still far away.
[22:15] ---
    One crisis after another.
[22:16] ---
    In the next episode,
[22:19] ---
    he'll be fighting the show's animal mascot,
[22:21] ---
    as well as a 21st century
    household appliance.
[22:27] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[22:27] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[22:33] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[22:33] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:38] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:38] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:43] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:43] ---
    I will take from you
[22:48] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:48] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:54] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:54] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:58] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:58] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[23:04] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[23:04] ---
    Go by emptily
[23:09] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[23:09] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[23:15] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[23:15] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[23:20] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[23:20] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[23:25] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[23:25] ---
    I sought it out
[23:30] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[23:30] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:35] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:35] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:40] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:40] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:45] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:45] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:50] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:50] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[24:01] ---
    Preview
[24:02] ---
    Such a poor-looking boy,
[24:04] ---
    who seems unlikely to ever
    have any luck with money!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:07] ---
    I am absolutely against
    hiring him as a butler!
[24:09] ---
    What did you say?!
[24:09] ---
    If you have a problem with Hayate's
    strength or qualifications,
[24:13] ---
    why not give him an evaluation test?
[24:15] ---
    An evaluation test?
[24:17] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:19] ---
    "The Beast, the Robot, and the Butler that
    Shouted or Maybe Didn't Shout Love..."
[24:22] ---
    "...at the Heart of the World".
[24:23] ---
    The Beast, the Robot, and the Butler that Shouted
    or Maybe Didn't Shout Love at the Heart of the World
[24:23] ---
    It'll be fine! Knowing you,
    Hayate, you'll manage somehow!
[24:26] ---
    The Red Lion's gonna roar!
[24:41] ---
    Please watch "Hayate the Combat
    Butler" again next time.

3 - The Beast, the Robot and the Butler that Shouted or Maybe Didn't Shout Love at the Heart of the World

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:09] ---
    That's right.
[00:11] ---
    I'm Nagi Sanzenin, 13 years old.
[00:15] ---
    A Sagittarius with blood type AB.
[00:17] ---
    My birthstone is turquoise.
[00:19] ---
    It's awful! It's awful!
[00:21] ---
    Maria, my precious butler's been
    kidnapped by some bad guys!
[00:25] ---
    Waaah!
[00:27] ---
    All right, since it's come to this,
    I'll transform into Mask the Money
[00:30] ---
    and I'll smack the bad guys with 150
    million yen, duralumin case and all!
[00:34] ---
    I'm the warrior of love,
    courage, money, power...
[00:37] ---
    ...and also of friendship,
    hard work, and victory!
[00:41] ---
    In the name of money, Mask
    the Money will punish you!
[00:46] ---
    It will take approximately 40
    years to pay that back in full.
[00:50] ---
    Well, given how much it is...
[00:52] ---
    That's what happens when you work
    out a reasonable repayment plan.
[00:55] ---
    No interest, no collateral, and
    repayment contingent on your success.
[00:57] ---
    No financial institution would
    loan you 150 million like that.
[01:00] ---
    You should be grateful. There's
    no reason to resent me.
[01:03] ---
    P-Please don't worry. I am grateful.
[01:07] ---
    Your smile is twitching.
[01:09] ---
    Hayate found himself trembling anew
    at the overwhelming amount he owed.
[01:14] ---
    Looks like spring is still a long way away.
[01:17] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:21] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:24] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:27] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:31] ---
    Yes!
[01:32] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:36] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:41] ---
    Looks like spring is still a long way away.
[01:46] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:46] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:53] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:53] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:00] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:00] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:03] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:03] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:07] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:07] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:12] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:12] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:16] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:16] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:21] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:21] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:24] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:24] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:31] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:31] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:37] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:37] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:40] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:40] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:43] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:43] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:50] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:50] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:56] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:56] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:17] ---
    The Beast, the Robot, and the Butler that Shouted
     or Maybe Didn't Shout Love at the Heart of the World
[03:21] ---
    What? There are only 3 people
    living on this estate?
[03:24] ---
    Yes. Even among our secondary residences,
    this one is particularly small,
[03:28] ---
    so we don't need that many servants.
[03:30] ---
    I see, so this place is small...
[03:34] ---
    But when there are so few people,
    it makes me feel even more tense.
[03:38] ---
    How so?
[03:39] ---
    Because, I'm going to be
    living here, too, right?
[03:42] ---
    No matter how vast this place is,
[03:44] ---
    the situation of being under
    one roof with a cute girl is...
[03:48] ---
    Y-You idiot, don't say it like that!
[03:51] ---
    We may be under one roof, but...
[03:53] ---
    I mean, it's not as if we're
    sleeping in the same room.
[03:56] ---
    Well... But still, the
    thought makes my heart race.
[04:00] ---
    Makes his heart race?
[04:02] ---
    You know, living together with
    a pretty girl like Maria.
[04:06] ---
    What do you mean by that?
[04:09] ---
    I'm warning you,
[04:10] ---
    if you ever lay a hand on Maria,
    I'll do far more than just kill you.
[04:13] ---
    Uh... What?
[04:14] ---
    I'll use all 48 killer techniques
    and 52 submission holds on you
[04:19] ---
    and I'll turn you into mince
    meat with the roller from hell!
[04:21] ---
    What?
[04:22] ---
    Uh, um, what do you mean
    by "lay a hand" on her?
[04:27] ---
    Thus, with the end of
    the year coming up fast,
[04:30] ---
    my new life began.
[04:36] ---
    I guess it's already New Year's Eve.
[04:38] ---
    This year sure was a terrible year.
[04:42] ---
    My home was utterly cleaned out,
[04:43] ---
    Eviction Notice
[04:44] ---
    not even the table was spared.
[04:46] ---
    And I couldn't muster the urge to
    find my parents, who ran out on me,
[04:47] ---
    To Hayate
    A Christmas Present For You
[04:50] ---
    so I accepted the Miss's kindness
[04:52] ---
    and decided to work as a butler
    at this Sanzenin estate.
[04:56] ---
    The amount I owe is definitely huge,
[04:58] ---
    but I'm just going to work
    hard, so I don't get fired!
[05:01] ---
    So, Maria, I have a question...
[05:04] ---
    What should I do?
[05:06] ---
    I still don't have a clear
    picture of what my job is.
[05:09] ---
    Let me think...
[05:10] ---
    In a word...
[05:12] ---
    I suppose you're Nagi's pet.
[05:14] ---
    I-I'm her pet?
[05:16] ---
    That was a little joke.
[05:18] ---
    R-Right...
[05:20] ---
    I'm sure you'll gradually come
    to understand what your job is,
[05:24] ---
    so for the time being, would
    you please go wake up Nagi?
[05:27] ---
    C-Certainly.
SIGN    Let's keep things neat and tidy. Floor Layout (2nd Floor)
[05:30] ---
    Let's see. Study, piano room, homework
    room, reading room, wardrobe room,
[05:35] ---
    plus a PlayStation room, a Dreamcast
    room, and an N64 room...
[05:38] ---
    Is there any point in keeping these separate?
[05:42] ---
    This must be it.
[05:47] ---
    Good morning, Miss.
[05:50] ---
    It's morning!
[05:51] ---
    If you don't get up soon, your
    wonderful breakfast will get cold...
[05:57] ---
    Calm down. Calm down, Hayate.
[06:00] ---
    It's impossible. It must be a 1:1 scale
    model made by Kaiyodo or something.
[06:06] ---
    No, it's got to be Sony!
[06:07] ---
    It must be Sony's new model of
    the AIBO or the PlayStation 5!
[06:10] ---
    Man, Sony's world renowned
    technology sure is amazing!
[06:15] ---
    Oh? Hayate?
[06:18] ---
    You came to wake me up? Thank you.
[06:21] ---
    By the way, why are you just standing there?
[06:23] ---
    N-Nothing, just that, behind you...
[06:27] ---
    Oh, no wonder it was hot. So you
    were sleeping with me, Tama.
[06:32] ---
    Tama?! He's enormous and
    you treat him like a cat?!
[06:35] ---
    Come on, Tama, wake up.
[06:36] ---
    If you don't wake up soon,
    your breakfast will be gone.
[06:39] ---
    Oh, don't! Such behavior will result
    in you becoming his breakfast!
[06:42] ---
    M-Miss, wait...
[06:46] ---
    No, you idiot!
[06:48] ---
    I just woke up! Don't stare at me so much!
[06:50] ---
    That's not it! That might be what
    our older audience is doing,
[06:53] ---
    but that's not the issue right now!
[06:56] ---
    You seem awfully shocked by Tama.
[06:59] ---
    Pitiful! Really! You are truly
    pitiful, Hayate Ayasaki!
[07:04] ---
    Where the hell did you come from?!
[07:08] ---
    Uh, um, who is he?
[07:10] ---
    Oh, right, you still hadn't met...
[07:13] ---
    My name is Klaus.
[07:15] ---
    I am the head butler of
    the Sanzenin household.
[07:17] ---
    Head butler? In other
    words, you're my superior?
[07:22] ---
    Wait, now's not the time!
[07:23] ---
    Miss, you're in danger!
[07:26] ---
    In danger?
[07:27] ---
    What are you saying? It's one measly cat.
[07:29] ---
    No, no, that's...
[07:31] ---
    A tiger. It's a tiger.
[07:32] ---
    Oh, you!
[07:33] ---
    That was my chance to make a pointed
    comment after keeping quiet until now!
[07:37] ---
    Listen well, boy.
[07:38] ---
    If the Miss says that it
    is a cat, it is a cat.
[07:41] ---
    This is Tama, whose zoological
    name is Whitetigerneko!
[07:44] ---
    Wait, you just said it was a tiger!
[07:46] ---
    A gigantic, vicious-looking beast
    like this needs to be caged quickly!
[07:54] ---
    It looks like that long-winded
    remark has offended Tama.
[07:58] ---
    What?
[07:59] ---
    I'll warn you now.
[08:00] ---
    Tama is a stupid cat, who is only
    friendly towards the Miss and Maria!
[08:04] ---
    Anyone who offends this idiot
    becomes his victim immediately!
[08:09] ---
    Doesn't that mean that he isn't
    friendly towards you, either?
[08:12] ---
    Oh...
[08:15] ---
    Th-That's not true... Right, Tama?
[08:26] ---
    Hey, Tama, enough with the rampage.
[08:33] ---
    Honestly! What a huge commotion
    first thing in the morning.
[08:36] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss. You saved me.
[08:39] ---
    Tama, as a cat of the Sanzenin family,
    you should keep this in mind.
[08:43] ---
    If you're going to play...
[08:46] ---
    ...take it outside!
[08:50] ---
    Wh-Why you! Don't get too carried away!
[08:53] ---
    Cyclamen
[08:56] ---
    Don't think this is my first
    time fighting a savage beast.
[08:59] ---
    I may not look it,
[09:01] ---
    but my parents once told me,
    "We'll give you meat to eat,"
[09:03] ---
    so I ended up breaking into a safari park
[09:05] ---
    and stealing meat from the
    lions on a regular basis!
[09:08] ---
    That's my Hayate for you!
[09:10] ---
    It looks like he can play
    with Tama as an equal, too!
[09:12] ---
    We shall see about that.
[09:14] ---
    Think of how many butler candidates
    have fallen in defeat before Tama...
[09:18] ---
    Hayate will be able to
    win, even against Tama!
[09:20] ---
    Then, if he cannot, I shall
    consider him a failure as a butler
[09:23] ---
    and have him leave.
[09:25] ---
    That's fine! You can fire
    him or do whatever you want!
[09:28] ---
    WHAT?!
[09:29] ---
    If I can't win barehanded against
    a tiger, I'll be out of work?
[09:32] ---
    In the safari park, all I did
    was basically run away...
[09:35] ---
    Hayate!
[09:36] ---
    Go for it!
[09:39] ---
    Oh, well. I should've died on
    that Christmas Day anyway...
[09:44] ---
    I have to try my best, so
    I don't disappoint her!
[09:48] ---
    Here I come!
[09:55] ---
    Pardon, Miss.
[09:57] ---
    Something has been bothering
    me for a while now, but...
[10:00] ---
    The area that they are fighting in...
[10:06] ---
    Now, then...
[10:11] ---
    I hope the cyclamens are
    flowering beautifully.
SIGN    Can't show you!
[10:15] ---
    I give up, I give up! I give up, Tama!
[10:17] ---
    Or rather, there's no way a person
    can win barehanded against a tiger!
[10:20] ---
    At least, give me a
    psychogun or a prog knife!
[10:23] ---
    Can't show you!
[10:23] ---
    Give me a knife!
[10:25] ---
    Tama.
[10:27] ---
    What are you doing?
[10:31] ---
    M-Maria...
[10:33] ---
    Honestly!
[10:34] ---
    I put great care into
    raising the flowers here,
[10:37] ---
    so I have repeatedly told
    you not to play in here...
[10:40] ---
    Cycla men
[10:43] ---
    Did you do this?
[10:46] ---
    Uh, um...
[10:48] ---
    Or were you egged on by the two upstairs,
[10:50] ---
    saying if Hayate couldn't win against Tama,
[10:52] ---
    he would be fired because he's
    not qualified as a butler?
[10:54] ---
    Busted!
[10:57] ---
    I will get to you once I finish
    treating Hayate's wounds,
[11:01] ---
    so would you mind waiting a
    little while for breakfast?
[11:03] ---
    Y-Yessir.
[11:05] ---
    Sure...
[11:08] ---
    I'm so sorry.
[11:09] ---
    I'll have a stern word with those two later.
[11:12] ---
    N-No, not at all.
[11:14] ---
    But why in the world does
    she have a pet tiger?
[11:17] ---
    A lot happened and he has nowhere else to go.
[11:20] ---
    Uh, but there are lots
    of places, like zoos...
[11:23] ---
    Yes, well...
[11:24] ---
    I'm embarrassed to say, the truth is...
[11:30] ---
    Nagi took him in when he became
    separated from his parents in Africa
[11:33] ---
    and after that, Tama was literally
    pampered like a kitten...
[11:37] ---
    Matsuzaka beef, top quality fatty
    tuna, massages 3 times a week...
[11:41] ---
    He became so used to luxuries,
    it would put humans to shame.
[11:44] ---
    So never mind the wild, he couldn't
    even handle life at a zoo.
[11:49] ---
    But he will never harm Nagi
[11:52] ---
    and he would surely risk
    his life to fight for Nagi.
[11:56] ---
    He has a very good understanding about that.
[11:59] ---
    He knows what would've happened
    if he hadn't met Nagi.
[12:03] ---
    If he hadn't met her...
[12:09] ---
    I see. So I guess you're the same as me.
[12:16] ---
    Don't lump me together with a loser like you!
[12:20] ---
    Moron!
[12:22] ---
    Sheesh! Looking so damn poor!
[12:25] ---
    Go get run over by a Mars rover and die!
[12:27] ---
    Fool!
[12:30] ---
    Also, don't tell the Miss and
    the others than I can talk.
[12:36] ---
    I-I see.
[12:37] ---
    Pets belonging to rich folks can talk...
[12:40] ---
    Having grown up surrounded with love,
[12:42] ---
    Tama apparently picked up human
    speech somewhere along the way.
[12:45] ---
    But other than Hayate, no
    one else knows of this fact.
[12:52] ---
    Devil's tongue noodles.
    (Itokonnyaku)
[12:57] ---
    Scoundrel!
    (Kusemono)
[13:00] ---
    At any rate, I am against
    making this person a butler!
[13:03] ---
    I see.
[13:06] ---
    Is this the mustache that's
    making these lame jokes?!
[13:08] ---
    That hurts! My mustache!
[13:09] ---
    Is this the mustache, Klaus?!
[13:11] ---
    That mustache is my pride and joy!
[13:12] ---
    I decided to hire him in
    thanks for saving my life.
[13:17] ---
    I believe I promised to select
    Himegami's replacement.
[13:20] ---
    There is something messed up about hiring
    a poor-looking boy in the first place!
[13:25] ---
    Y-Yes, his face may have the
    look of poverty about him,
[13:29] ---
    but it can have a calming effect!
[13:32] ---
    Hayate is the soothing type!
[13:33] ---
    If you wish to be soothed that much,
    you should get a hamster or something!
[13:38] ---
    Too bad! A hamster's too soothing!
[13:40] ---
    Hayate's look of poverty is
    actually just about right!
[13:43] ---
    This boy looks like he'll never
    have money luck in his life!
[13:46] ---
    Hiring him will only bring
    misfortune to those around him!
[13:49] ---
    Um, they both do mean well...
[13:52] ---
    I know...
[13:54] ---
    There's no knowing when you
    might become the target
[13:57] ---
    of another kidnapping like the other day.
[13:59] ---
    Without the strength to protect his
    mistress, even at the cost of his life,
[14:01] ---
    we cannot hire him!
[14:03] ---
    Protect my mistress, even
    at the cost of my life...?
[14:06] ---
    Strength, is it? Then there's no problem.
[14:09] ---
    Pardon?
[14:10] ---
    Certainly, Hayate's body is uncommonly tough.
[14:13] ---
    After all, he was able to handle Tama.
[14:16] ---
    That's not all.
[14:18] ---
    I'll have you know, with
    every transformation,
[14:19] ---
    Hayate's combat abilities will
    increase by leaps and bounds.
[14:22] ---
    And Hayate still has two stages
    of transformation left.
[14:25] ---
    You understand what this means?
[14:27] ---
    What?! I have no such functionality!
[14:30] ---
    What?! You don't?!
[14:31] ---
    Really?!
[14:33] ---
    I'm not Frieza. Looking so
    troubled isn't going to help...
[14:37] ---
    If you have a problem with Hayate's
    strength or qualifications,
[14:41] ---
    why not give him an evaluation test?
[14:43] ---
    Evaluation test?!
[14:45] ---
    Yes, if he is truly capable
    of protecting the Miss,
[14:48] ---
    he should even be able to swim across
    a pool of boiling hot coal tar.
[14:52] ---
    What?!
[14:53] ---
    Hmm, a butler should definitely be fine,
[14:56] ---
    even if he's dropped from
    a height of 2000 meters.
[14:58] ---
    Um, hello?
[15:00] ---
    All right, we accept your challenge!
[15:02] ---
    Wait! Um, what about what I think?
[15:05] ---
    Then please wait a moment.
[15:07] ---
    I shall have the test prepared right away.
[15:09] ---
    Yes! Bring it on! Do you worst!
[15:12] ---
    Augh...
[15:13] ---
    Or rather, I don't know
    what I'm being tested on,
[15:16] ---
    but is it going to be okay?
[15:17] ---
    In more ways than one...
[15:18] ---
    It'll be fine!
[15:19] ---
    What?
[15:20] ---
    Knowing you, you'll be
    able to manage somehow.
[15:24] ---
    Cyclamen
[15:27] ---
    Um, Maria, could it be the Miss
    has high expectations of me?
[15:32] ---
    High... expectations?
[15:34] ---
    She tends to be extremely
    shy around strangers
[15:37] ---
    and she doesn't openly show
    her emotions very much...
[15:39] ---
    What?
[15:40] ---
    In particular, she's been smiling
    less after Himegami left.
[15:45] ---
    So it's been a while since
    she was that energetic.
[15:50] ---
    The fact that you saved her
    must have really delighted her.
[15:54] ---
    Part of me is definitely
    doing it for the money,
[15:59] ---
    but if she's putting her faith in me...
[16:04] ---
    I decided that I wanted to
    live up to her expectations.
[16:10] ---
    Now, then, are you prepared for this?
[16:12] ---
    This is the test that will
    evaluate how qualified you are!
[16:16] ---
    This is...!
[16:21] ---
    Um, what is this?
[16:22] ---
    Currently being developed by a company
    controlled by the Sanzenin family,
[16:26] ---
    this is the caregiver robot "Eight"!
[16:27] ---
    I have been waiting for
    you, Mr. Hayate Ayasaki.
[16:31] ---
    Don't tell me you expect
    me to fight this thing...?
[16:34] ---
    Don't be so crass.
[16:36] ---
    He is a caregiver robot.
[16:37] ---
    In other words, the ultimate
    butler, born to serve his master!
[16:41] ---
    You will use these various
    items from daily life
[16:44] ---
    and you and Eight will compete to
    see who is the superior butler.
[16:47] ---
    Wait. Miss?
[16:49] ---
    I don't know... This is
    an awfully ugly robot.
[16:53] ---
    Grr!
[16:54] ---
    Please!
[16:55] ---
    This is technically the world's
    most cutting-edge caregiver robot!
[16:58] ---
    Most cutting-edge?! This thing?!
[17:00] ---
    If an ugly robot like this
    was taking care of you,
[17:02] ---
    wouldn't you actually want to die?
[17:04] ---
    Please!
[17:05] ---
    Well, at any rate,
[17:06] ---
    this robot doesn't seem capable
    of combining or transforming.
[17:09] ---
    There's no way Hayate would lose. Right?
[17:12] ---
    W-Well...
[17:13] ---
    I-If you want to see combining
    or transforming that badly...
[17:17] ---
    ...how about I transform you?!
[17:23] ---
    Damn! I missed.
[17:27] ---
    My, my, what a terribly
    short-tempered cutting-edge robot.
[17:32] ---
    Wait, this is no time for that!
    Please hurry up and shut it down!
[17:37] ---
    Once my ardent pathos is set
    in motion, no one can stop me!
[17:41] ---
    You shut up!
[17:42] ---
    Mr. Klaus?
[17:43] ---
    Um, as I recall, to stop it,
    you have to open the back panel
[17:47] ---
    and enter the password 1-1-9-2...
[17:49] ---
    Hayate, it'll apparently
    stop if you just break it!
[17:52] ---
    H-Hey!
[17:53] ---
    So this is going in that
    direction, after all.
[17:56] ---
    Hayate!
[18:00] ---
    That's right! I have to protect the Miss!
[18:02] ---
    For I'm... I'm to be her butler!
[18:10] ---
    I am going to fight in earnest!
[18:12] ---
    Miss, please step over there.
[18:21] ---
    What?! Is this guy really for caregiving?!
[18:24] ---
    Fire!
[18:29] ---
    It must be a feature necessary
    for women living alone...
[18:34] ---
    You know, stalkers seem to be a big problem.
[18:36] ---
    That sounds absurdly fishy.
[18:41] ---
    Kid, don't think you can keep
    running away from me forever!
[18:45] ---
    Hayate!
[18:51] ---
    That's the water pipe!
[18:53] ---
    I see! Machines are weak against water!
[18:55] ---
    I wonder who's going to clean up this mess...
[18:58] ---
    So what?
[18:59] ---
    The waterproofing on Japanese
    robots is the best in the world!
[19:03] ---
    Now's my chance!
[19:08] ---
    Wha?!
[19:12] ---
    Th-These are...!
[19:13] ---
    That's right!
[19:14] ---
    Pure silver knives, which conduct
    electricity better than stainless steel!
[19:17] ---
    Furthermore, underfoot is a
    wool carpet soaked with water!
[19:21] ---
    And this is 100 volts of pure domestic power!
[19:25] ---
    W-Wait, if you use that
    under these circumstances,
[19:28] ---
    you'll be electrocuted, too!
[19:30] ---
    I'm sure.
[19:32] ---
    But...
[19:33] ---
    It's apparently a butler's
    duty to protect his mistress,
[19:35] ---
    even if it costs his life.
[19:39] ---
    Hayate...
[19:40] ---
    Act cool all you want. You're going
    to be poor for the rest of your life.
[19:45] ---
    Buster Collider!
[19:47] ---
    Wh-What's a Collider?!
[19:49] ---
    Takaya!
[19:50] ---
    And you kids out there,
    don't ever do this at home.
[19:57] ---
    He acquitted himself rather
    brilliantly, didn't he?
[20:00] ---
    Do you still find Hayate's
    abilities dissatisfactory?
[20:03] ---
    Very well.
[20:05] ---
    We can employ him at least
    until we find our next butler.
[20:14] ---
    And now, with the tolling
    of the New Year's Eve bells,
[20:17] ---
    the new year is finally almost
    upon the Japanese archipelago.
[20:21] ---
    Good-bye to the last year.
[20:23] ---
    Hello to the new year.
[20:25] ---
    We hope that the new year
    is a good year for everyone.
[20:30] ---
    Ah! You're awake! I was worried!
[20:33] ---
    Miss...
[20:35] ---
    Oh! What happened to the butler test?!
[20:38] ---
    You passed, of course.
[20:40] ---
    Thank goodness...
[20:42] ---
    But I made such a mess of that room...
[20:45] ---
    I am sorry.
[20:46] ---
    It doesn't really matter.
[20:47] ---
    What?
[20:48] ---
    There are plenty of other rooms
    that will serve as replacements.
[20:51] ---
    But there is no replacement for you...
[20:54] ---
    Miss...
[20:58] ---
    O-Oh! So, well, you know...
[21:00] ---
    I was happy that you protected me. So, um...
[21:06] ---
    I-I'll continue...
[21:12] ---
    ...to count on you, Hayate!
[21:15] ---
    Yes, please leave it to me, Miss.
[21:22] ---
    There are still a lot of problems,
[21:25] ---
    but it seems he should continue
    to do well at this estate.
[21:29] ---
    Oh, my!
[21:30] ---
    That day, I swore to myself!
[21:33] ---
    That I would protect this person, the
    Miss, even if it cost me my life!
[21:39] ---
    Hey, you there! Are you listening?!
[21:45] ---
    Eh?
[21:46] ---
    That's what you get for going
    on and on for 3 whole episodes.
[21:50] ---
    Look! The cherry blossoms
    have all scattered already!
[21:52] ---
    What of it?!
[21:53] ---
    Now, let us continue where we left off!
[21:59] ---
    Up we go...
[22:01] ---
    Starting next episode is a new development!
[22:05] ---
    This showdown sequence has been put
    off since the start of Episode 1,
[22:09] ---
    but this will finally be the end of it!
[22:12] ---
    Hayate!
[22:13] ---
    New development!
[22:15] ---
    And thus, the boy became a legend...
[22:17] ---
    No, he became a butler.
[22:19] ---
    Next time, he will fight with a giant campus!
[22:26] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[22:26] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[22:32] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[22:32] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:36] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:36] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:42] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:42] ---
    I will take from you
[22:47] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:47] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:52] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:52] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:57] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:57] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[23:02] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[23:02] ---
    Go by emptily
[23:07] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[23:07] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[23:13] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[23:13] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[23:18] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[23:18] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[23:24] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[23:24] ---
    I sought it out
[23:29] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[23:29] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:34] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:34] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:39] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:39] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:44] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:44] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:48] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:48] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:59] ---
    Preview
[24:02] ---
    You're not a Hakuou student, are you?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:04] ---
    Just who are you?!
[24:05] ---
    Um, I'm...
[24:06] ---
    Don't lie to me!
[24:08] ---
    But I haven't said anything yet...
[24:09] ---
    Could Hayate have become involved
    in something troublesome again...?
[24:13] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    "My First Errand. This
    Is Snake. No Response".
[24:18] ---
    Ayasaki, if you don't try to get
    what you want once in a while,
[24:21] ---
    you'll miss your chance at happiness.
[24:22] ---
    Have you ever felt the cosmos?!
[24:23] ---
    My First Errand
    ~This Is Snake. No Response
[24:39] ---
    SIGN: If you don't watch "Hayate the Combat
    Butler" again next time, I'll get mad.
[24:44] ---
    

4 - My First Errand - This Is Snake. No Response

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:09] ---
    Hmm, somewhere along the way,
    it's gotten all spring-like.
[00:13] ---
    I have this weird feeling like
    the season suddenly changed...
[00:16] ---
    And I can't help but sense
    the will of some being,
[00:19] ---
    similar to the invisible hand of God...
[00:21] ---
    So, how about it?
[00:22] ---
    Have you gotten used to
    life here at the estate?
[00:25] ---
    Well?
[00:26] ---
    The tiger shouldn't suddenly start
    talking, right from the intro.
[00:29] ---
    It'll confuse the non-productive
    members of society
[00:31] ---
    who just started watching the show.
[00:33] ---
    Forget about them. Think about the children.
[00:35] ---
    And you got a problem with me talking?
[00:37] ---
    Never mind speaking,
[00:39] ---
    I'm a Class 2 real estate broker
    and a licensed boiler engineer.
[00:42] ---
    Real estate broker?
[00:43] ---
    Ah-ah!
[00:44] ---
    But don't tell the Miss and
    the others than I can talk.
[00:47] ---
    You know, in terms of a Pokémon analogy,
    which celebrated its 10th anniversary,
[00:50] ---
    I'm technically the Pikachu of this show,
[00:52] ---
    so it's about the image.
    The image is important.
[00:54] ---
    Acting like you're a respectable mascot!
[00:56] ---
    You're just a lame PR character!
[00:58] ---
    Don't tell me you think you can boost
    the economy by tens of billions of yen.
[01:02] ---
    Wha?! Wh-Why you!
[01:04] ---
    How am I a lame PR character?!
[01:06] ---
    I may not look it, but a certain
    popular weekly boys' manga magazine
[01:10] ---
    had me ranked 12th in popularity!
[01:13] ---
    And even at the autograph session in Nagoya!
[01:14] ---
    The last character to be requested
    on an art board was me!
[01:15] ---
    Oh? The Miss...
[01:16] ---
    I wonder if she's going
    out somewhere for once.
[01:17] ---
    Listen!
[01:19] ---
    Wait for me. I'll return without fail.
[01:23] ---
    In truth, I do not really want to go, either.
[01:25] ---
    Where could the Miss be headed?
[01:27] ---
    It was a fateful parting for Hayate and Nagi.
[01:32] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:35] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:38] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:42] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:45] ---
    Yes!
[01:46] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:50] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:54] ---
    Hey, wait, you damn butler-in-debt!
[01:56] ---
    Don't ignore me, you bastard!
[02:01] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[02:01] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:08] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:08] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:14] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:14] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:17] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:17] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:22] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:22] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:27] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:27] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:30] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:30] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:35] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:35] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:39] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:39] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:45] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:45] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:52] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:52] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:55] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:55] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:58] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:58] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:04] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:04] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:11] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:11] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:30] ---
    My First Errand
    ~This Is Snake. No Response.
[03:35] ---
    This is a problem...
[03:36] ---
    Maria, it seems the Miss has
    left on a rare outing somewhere!
[03:41] ---
    "Somewhere?" She went to school.
[03:42] ---
    What?!
[03:43] ---
    You shouldn't be so surprised.
[03:46] ---
    I mean, she's obviously a school-age child.
[03:48] ---
    W-Well, but ever since
    I came to this estate...
[03:52] ---
    I totally thought she was receiving
    a special education from tutors.
[03:57] ---
    No, she is... How should I put this?
[03:59] ---
    She has a touch of you-know-what...
[04:01] ---
    Acute societal withdrawal?
[04:04] ---
    And it's mid-April already, right?
[04:06] ---
    So the school sent a notice, saying
    she should attend once in a while.
[04:09] ---
    I see. Incidentally, which
    school does she attend?
[04:12] ---
    She's technically a student
    at Hakuou Academy.
[04:14] ---
    Hakuou?!
[04:15] ---
    Hakuou is where all the rich kids go!
[04:17] ---
    It's a super famous school
    that covers grades 1-12!
[04:21] ---
    The one thing she is, is smart.
[04:23] ---
    But this is a problem...
[04:25] ---
    What's that?
[04:27] ---
    Nagi's lunch. She forgot it.
[04:30] ---
    I will deliver it.
[04:32] ---
    What? But...
[04:33] ---
    This is part of my duties as a butler.
[04:37] ---
    Wow...
[04:39] ---
    We're in modern day Tokyo here, right?
[04:42] ---
    Or rather...
[04:42] ---
    Hakuou Academy
[04:43] ---
    This place just might be
    bigger than Suginami Ward.
[04:47] ---
    Finding the Miss in there
    is going to be difficult!
[04:52] ---
    I'll have to work hard...
[04:53] ---
    Hold it right there.
[04:54] ---
    You're not a Hakuou student, are you?
[04:57] ---
    Just who are you?! Identify yourself!
[05:00] ---
    Huh? Are you a teacher here?
[05:02] ---
    Oh, no, I'm Miss Nagi Sanzenin's...
[05:05] ---
    Don't lie to me!
[05:09] ---
    There's no way that you're Nagi!
[05:11] ---
    She may have no chest, but
    she's still a girl! A girl!
[05:15] ---
    There are limits to lies and
    credit cards, you know! Limits!
[05:18] ---
    N-No, that is not what I meant.
[05:20] ---
    I am the Miss's butler, you see.
[05:23] ---
    Don't give me that nonsense!
[05:32] ---
    What incredible cosmos...
[05:34] ---
    What butler has such a look
    of poverty about him?!
[05:37] ---
    Well, there may be some out there,
[05:39] ---
    but I've never seen one.
[05:40] ---
    I make a point of only believing
    what I've seen myself!
[05:42] ---
    Do you get it?! I mean, do you get it?!
[05:44] ---
    I have a duty to protect this school
    from suspicious individuals.
[05:48] ---
    Why? Because I can't afford to
    have my salary docked any further.
[05:52] ---
    So, you're a suspicious individual! Get lost!
[05:54] ---
    I cannot do that.
[05:56] ---
    I also...
[05:58] ---
    ...have an important duty to
    deliver this lunch to the Miss!
[06:02] ---
    In other words, it's a clash of duties.
[06:05] ---
    Yes, that's what this is.
[06:07] ---
    Let me at least get your name first.
[06:09] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[06:11] ---
    And you are?
[06:13] ---
    I'm not introducing myself!
[06:15] ---
    What?!
[06:16] ---
    Why? Because it's personal information!
[06:18] ---
    Keeping your personal information safe
    is common sense in this modern age!
[06:22] ---
    Y-You're awful...
[06:25] ---
    You fell for it, Hayate Ayasaki.
[06:28] ---
    The battle has already begun!
[06:31] ---
    Uh, I don't really understand,
    but that was cheap.
[06:35] ---
    What's going on?
[06:36] ---
    Oh, just looks like Katsy's
    in fine form again today.
[06:39] ---
    Who's that hapless looking kid?
[06:42] ---
    Now, give it up, Ayasaki.
[06:44] ---
    You're not capable of getting past me!
[06:49] ---
    The background has turned into
    another dimension for some reason!
[07:03] ---
    C-Could this be the legendary Drunken Fist?!
[07:06] ---
    Though, I don't think that's quite it...
[07:09] ---
    Still, I need to get past this person
    at all costs and get into the school...
[07:12] ---
    Into the school...
[07:14] ---
    Into the school...
[07:16] ---
    Oh! What do you know? I've
    already gotten past you.
[07:19] ---
    Shoot!
[07:20] ---
    We'd switched places before I knew it!
[07:24] ---
    You're pretty good.
[07:25] ---
    Well, I have to be on my way.
[07:27] ---
    W-Wait! That didn't count! It didn't count!
[07:31] ---
    Well, no idiot would actually wait...
[07:34] ---
    ...when told to wait.
[07:36] ---
    You three...
[07:38] ---
    Friends of all ages watching this anime,
[07:41] ---
    I am pleased to make your acquaintance.
[07:43] ---
    I am Miki Hanabishi, a
    student of this Academy.
[07:46] ---
    I'm Izumi Segawa.
[07:49] ---
    I am Haruo Minami.
[07:52] ---
    Sorry. I'm Risa Asakaze.
[07:54] ---
    Don't show up out of the blue
[07:55] ---
    and start promoting yourself to
    people outside the picture tube!
[07:58] ---
    What about your classes anyway?
[08:01] ---
    "Picture tube"?
[08:02] ---
    Pardon, but surely this disturbance
    is more important than any classes.
[08:04] ---
    "Picture tube"?
[08:07] ---
    What is this? The Showa era?
[08:07] ---
    Want our help, Katsy?
[08:09] ---
    Huh?
[08:15] ---
    Shoot. I picked up this habit from
    when debt collectors were after me
[08:18] ---
    and ran away without thinking, but...
[08:19] ---
    Mandarin Oranges
[08:26] ---
    I'm not actually a suspicious
    individual in the first place.
[08:29] ---
    So I should act boldly and
    fearlessly. Boldy and fearlessly!
[08:32] ---
    Because I am now a butler
    of the Sanzenin family!
[08:36] ---
    Wait... Huh? Where am I?
[08:41] ---
    Still...
[08:43] ---
    That clock tower sure is impressive.
[08:45] ---
    Since I've come all this way, I'd
    love to climb to the top just once.
[08:49] ---
    You won't be able to.
[08:50] ---
    Only members of the student council
[08:52] ---
    are allowed at the top of the clock tower.
[08:55] ---
    Wh-Who are you? Where in the world are you?
[08:59] ---
    I'm right over here.
[09:02] ---
    Honestly!
[09:03] ---
    I wonder what a Sanzenin family butler
    is doing in a place like this.
[09:08] ---
    Um... What are you doing
    in a place like that?
[09:12] ---
    That's a Sanzenin family butler for you.
[09:14] ---
    Wasting no time getting
    to the crux of the matter.
[09:16] ---
    I see, climbing trees is all
    the rage at Hakuou Academy.
[09:19] ---
    Does this look like I'm having fun?!
[09:22] ---
    But it's dangerous.
[09:23] ---
    I know! You don't need to tell me that!
[09:26] ---
    This is... you know, one of those situations.
[09:29] ---
    Trees aren't as slippery as you might think
[09:31] ---
    and with the branches, they're
    pretty easy to climb,
[09:33] ---
    but when you're only looking up you
    neglect to look down, if you will...
[09:36] ---
    To put it simply, the cat has a
    great time getting up the tree,
[09:39] ---
    but finds itself unable to get
    down... Something like that?
[09:42] ---
    Don't put it so simply! It
    makes it sound like I'm a fool!
[09:45] ---
    Sure, they say fools and smoke
    like to get up to high places,
[09:48] ---
    but I'm not a fool, all right?!
[09:50] ---
    No one said you were...
[09:52] ---
    Well, whatever.
[09:54] ---
    If you're a Sanzenin family butler,
    you have decent reflexes, right?
[09:57] ---
    Huh?
[09:59] ---
    Come to think of it, why does she know
    that I'm the new Sanzenin butler?
[10:04] ---
    At any rate...
[10:06] ---
    I have a little favor to ask.
[10:09] ---
    Favor?
[10:10] ---
    So, well, um...
[10:13] ---
    Ca...
[10:14] ---
    Catch me, okay?
[10:15] ---
    What?!
[10:17] ---
    Here goes!
[10:18] ---
    WHAT?!
[10:24] ---
    Oh, sorry. Are you okay?
[10:26] ---
    Y-Yes, somehow...
[10:32] ---
    That was no good.
[10:33] ---
    You didn't catch me properly.
    That was dangerous.
[10:35] ---
    If you think it's dangerous, please
    don't jump in the first place!
[10:39] ---
    I'm sorry.
[10:41] ---
    But you don't have to yell at me like that.
[10:43] ---
    I was really scared and I wanted
    to get down as quick as possible.
[10:47] ---
    I'm afraid of heights...
[10:50] ---
    W-Well, that's fine...
[10:52] ---
    But it's unseemly.
[10:54] ---
    For a girl! In a skirt!
[10:56] ---
    Huh? It's no problem.
[10:58] ---
    I'm wearing bike shorts.
[11:00] ---
    Wh-What are you thinking?!
[11:02] ---
    A girl should behave more modestly!
[11:05] ---
    Huh? What's with this naïve attitude?
[11:07] ---
    Could it be that Sanzenin family butlers
[11:09] ---
    have the emotional sophistication
    of a grade schooler?
[11:12] ---
    Y-You're mocking me...
[11:14] ---
    Besides, you didn't have to jump so suddenly.
[11:15] ---
    I would've come to your
    rescue if you'd just asked!
[11:18] ---
    Wow, so I just have to
    ask to get rescued, huh?
[11:23] ---
    Oh, that reminds me,
[11:25] ---
    if you don't like high places,
    what were you doing up there?
[11:28] ---
    Hmm? Well, I didn't have a choice.
[11:30] ---
    Because that little one had fallen
    from his nest and he was crying.
[11:35] ---
    In this day and age,
[11:37] ---
    you climbed a tree you couldn't get
    down from for a reason like that?
[11:39] ---
    Wh-What?! Making fun of me again?!
[11:42] ---
    No, just thinking you're a kind person.
[11:45] ---
    Pardon me for all the rude things I said.
[11:49] ---
    As long as you understand...
[11:51] ---
    But now, that chick can rest easy...
[11:57] ---
    Hey, you stupid thing!
    What's up with that crow?!
[12:02] ---
    You can't! You might hit the chick!
[12:05] ---
    Th-Those are...
[12:06] ---
    The parents!
[12:07] ---
    Ah, so beautiful parental
    love will save the chick!
[12:14] ---
    What? They're going to abandon him?!
[12:16] ---
    A mother and father abandoning
    their own child...
[12:20] ---
    It's never okay to do that!
[12:28] ---
    Mr. Crow, would you please leave it at that?
[12:32] ---
    Or else, next time...
[12:33] ---
    ...I'll have to hit you.
[12:40] ---
    Wait, you told me not to throw
    it, but you did it anyway.
[12:44] ---
    I have good control, so...
[12:46] ---
    Wha... What's that mean?!
[12:48] ---
    You make it sound like I have no control!
[12:50] ---
    You really are just...
[12:51] ---
    My name is Hayate.
[12:52] ---
    Huh?
[12:53] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[12:55] ---
    And you are?
[13:00] ---
    I'm...
[13:07] ---
    Why do you get so hungry
    when you're in your youth?
[13:10] ---
    What might this pretty girl's name be?
[13:12] ---
    Leaving the mystery and suspicions for later,
[13:14] ---
    to be continued in the second half!
[13:19] ---
    Dried seaweed.
    (Nori)
[13:23] ---
    Lymph.
    (Rinpa)
[13:26] ---
    What? Hayate is?
[13:27] ---
    Yes, he should be over there.
[13:30] ---
    Have you not seen him yet?
[13:31] ---
    Well, this school is as
    vast as Vana'diel, so...
[13:36] ---
    But I see.
[13:38] ---
    So Hayate lovingly made
    a packed lunch for me...
[13:41] ---
    I understand. Not to worry, I will
    be sure to accept Hayate's love.
[13:45] ---
    No... "lovingly"? I'm the one who made it...
[13:50] ---
    But where could Hayate be?
[13:52] ---
    And what could he be doing?
[13:55] ---
    I see, so your name is Miss Hinagiku Katsura.
[13:58] ---
    It's a great name.
[13:59] ---
    You think so?
[14:01] ---
    Then, as part of my thanks, want
    me to take you to the top of that?
[14:04] ---
    What? But I thought only members of
    the student council can go there...
[14:08] ---
    It's not a problem.
[14:09] ---
    Because I'm the president
    of the student council.
[14:11] ---
    What?
[14:12] ---
    Honestly! What idiot decided to put the
    student council office way up there?
[14:17] ---
    I see.
[14:18] ---
    But Miss Katsura, you don't
    like high places, right?
[14:21] ---
    Don't worry about me.
[14:23] ---
    I'm satisfied with just
    getting to see it up close.
[14:26] ---
    But you said you wanted to go up
    there at least once, remember?
[14:29] ---
    You'll find even greater
    satisfaction if you go up there.
[14:32] ---
    Well, I'm sure, but...
[14:34] ---
    Then don't let this chance slip away.
[14:37] ---
    This is my thanks to you, after all.
[14:40] ---
    Ayasaki, if you don't try to get
    what you want once in a while,
[14:42] ---
    you'll miss your chance at happiness.
[14:45] ---
    But really, it's so stupid!
[14:48] ---
    Putting the student council
    office so high up...
[14:50] ---
    I feel like she might be
    a bit like Miss Nagi...
[14:54] ---
    Okay, let's go.
[14:55] ---
    I'm the student council president,
[14:56] ---
    so it's not like this is
    my first time up there.
[14:58] ---
    So don't worry about it.
[14:59] ---
    R-Right...
[15:00] ---
    A boy shouldn't give such
    a noncommittal answer!
[15:02] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[15:06] ---
    Was that... really a suspicious individual?
[15:09] ---
    It's possible that he's a
    real Sanzenin family butler.
[15:11] ---
    So high and mighty!
[15:13] ---
    What would a lame bachelor teacher who
    builds Gundam models at school know?
[15:18] ---
    Oh, crap! The head spike went somewhere!
[15:20] ---
    You listen to me!
[15:22] ---
    It doesn't matter anymore if he's
    really a suspicious individual or not!
[15:25] ---
    The illustrious Hakuou Academy allowed
    someone to break in! That's a fact!
[15:29] ---
    If we don't defeat him,
[15:30] ---
    Took the words right out of my mouth...
[15:30] ---
    people's confidence in the
    Academy's security will plummet!
[15:31] ---
    You can't let your guard down around her.
[15:33] ---
    And she's supposed to be a teacher...
[15:33] ---
    It'd be terrible if that happened!
    It would, wouldn't it?!
[15:36] ---
    Mainly, terrible for my salary,
    since I allowed the intruder in!
[15:37] ---
    Peace.
[15:38] ---
    Peace. Peace.
[15:40] ---
    Who are you people talking to?
[15:42] ---
    Okay, Miss Segawa, you
    take the school building!
[15:44] ---
    Miss Hanabishi, the area around the gym!
[15:46] ---
    And Miss Asakaze... um...
[15:48] ---
    Anyway, go search wherever you can!
[15:51] ---
    And take Yasu with you or something.
[15:52] ---
    Yasu... Who's that?
[15:53] ---
    Roger!
[15:55] ---
    We're doing this?
[15:56] ---
    I'll start by searching for the
    suspicious individual from above.
[16:01] ---
    Wow!
[16:03] ---
    This view is incredible!
[16:07] ---
    Like it? Wonderful, isn't it?
[16:09] ---
    The view from the clock
    tower is truly magnificent.
[16:12] ---
    The sheer beauty of it almost makes
    you forget to blink, doesn't it?
[16:16] ---
    You can't see it from so far inside.
[16:18] ---
    I'm fine. I'm viewing it
    through my mind's eye.
[16:21] ---
    But you really have a great
    view of the school from here.
[16:25] ---
    Right? The reason the student
    council office is here
[16:28] ---
    is so that we can have a
    good view of the students.
[16:31] ---
    Have you seen the view
    from here, Miss Katsura?
[16:34] ---
    I'm fine. I listen to my heart,
    rather than pay heed to my eyes.
[16:40] ---
    But really...
[16:45] ---
    School seems so fun.
[16:48] ---
    Oh? But class seems to
    be in session right now.
[16:51] ---
    Should you be here?
[16:52] ---
    Miss Katsura?
[16:53] ---
    Oh, honestly! Be quiet!
[16:55] ---
    There was no helping it!
[16:57] ---
    Classes started while I was helping Browny!
[17:01] ---
    By the way...
[17:02] ---
    Who is Browny?
[17:04] ---
    The chick we saved earlier.
[17:07] ---
    He's a brown sparrow, so he's "Browny".
[17:09] ---
    Wow, talk about simple.
[17:10] ---
    Wh-What?! It's important to
    have easy names in anime!
[17:16] ---
    Um, I should go deliver
    the Miss's lunch soon.
[17:19] ---
    Now that I know where the cafeteria is.
[17:24] ---
    Thank you very much.
[17:26] ---
    Because of you, I got to
    see an unforgettable view.
[17:30] ---
    Oh? You talk as if you'll
    never be coming here again.
[17:33] ---
    Well, it's unlikely that I'll ever have
    another opportunity, Miss Katsura.
[17:37] ---
    Call me Hinagiku.
[17:38] ---
    What?
[17:39] ---
    There's another Katsura,
    who stands out a lot here,
[17:42] ---
    so everyone calls me by my first name.
[17:44] ---
    So call me Hinagiku. Got it?
[17:48] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki.
[17:53] ---
    Suspicious individual sighted!
[17:55] ---
    Y-You are...!
[17:56] ---
    Sis!
[18:00] ---
    "Sis"?
[18:01] ---
    Yeah, Sis Yukiji.
[18:04] ---
    You damn suspicious individual,
    meet your hundred-year doom!
[18:07] ---
    Well, not that it's actually
    been a hundred years...
[18:10] ---
    What? Oh, yes, I suppose so...
[18:13] ---
    So, I'm going to destroy you immediately!
[18:16] ---
    Hold on! He's not a suspicious individual!
[18:18] ---
    Shut up! That doesn't matter anymore!
[18:21] ---
    I already explained that earlier
    to everyone watching this anime!
[18:26] ---
    Evil, therefore kill!
[18:26] ---
    Evil
[18:27] ---
    Therefore
[18:28] ---
    Kill
[18:28] ---
    Prepare to meet your fate!
[18:34] ---
    CLANG
[18:36] ---
    Hina?!
[18:37] ---
    Honestly! Another one of
    your nonsensical antics?!
[18:40] ---
    You've improved your skill, Hina!
[18:42] ---
    But that won't be enough to stop
    your sis's passion and young energy!
[18:46] ---
    Can't stop pay cuts, either!
[18:50] ---
    You're one to talk!
[18:51] ---
    I've never lost to you in a fight!
[18:54] ---
    The only thing I've lost to you in is age,
[18:56] ---
    which you've accumulated
    with nothing to show for it!
[18:58] ---
    Wha?!
[18:59] ---
    You may be my little sister, but I'm
    not forgiving you for that, Hina!
[19:03] ---
    Um, you two...
[19:04] ---
    Never mind that.
[19:05] ---
    When are you paying back the 20,000
    yen I loaned you last month?!
[19:06] ---
    Wha?! Th-That's a cheap shot!
    Taking Yukichi hostage!
[19:09] ---
    I never did that.
[19:10] ---
    Um, I need to get going soon to
    deliver this lunch to the Miss...
[19:10] ---
    Yukichi's to be respected, you know!
[19:12] ---
    His "Encouragement of Learning"
    sold 3.4 million copies, you know!
[19:15] ---
    Like I care!
[19:17] ---
    What?!
[19:24] ---
    Got it!
[19:25] ---
    Sis!
[19:27] ---
    Hina, want me to give this back?
[19:29] ---
    But can you come get it when
    you're afraid of heights?
[19:33] ---
    If you can't, turn over that suspicious
    individual right this minute
[19:36] ---
    and forget about the 20,000 yen!
[19:38] ---
    Hinagiku...
[19:39] ---
    Don't take me for a fool, Sis!
[19:42] ---
    I am the student council president
    of Hakuou Academy, Hinagiku Katsura.
[19:46] ---
    Treating a guest like a
    suspicious individual!
[19:49] ---
    I will absolutely not permit such behavior!
[19:57] ---
    That's my little sister for you. Then I'll...
[20:05] ---
    Sis!
[20:13] ---
    Honestly! It's dangerous
    to stand there like that.
[20:24] ---
    Sanzenin family butlers really are amazing.
[20:27] ---
    Ah, so you finally believe me.
[20:29] ---
    Yeah, I guess.
[20:31] ---
    Thank you, Hayate.
[20:33] ---
    For my sis...
[20:34] ---
    It was nothing. You were a great help
    clearing up the misunderstanding.
[20:37] ---
    Now, I need to go deliver
    the Miss's lunch soon, so...
[20:44] ---
    Sorry, I threw it earlier without thinking.
[20:48] ---
    Don't waste food!
[20:54] ---
    What'll I do? I'm going to be fired.
[20:57] ---
    Don't worry. I'll make sure
    to apologize to Nagi, okay?
[21:00] ---
    Y-Yeah, maybe I'll apologize, too! Yeah!
[21:03] ---
    What are you doing?
[21:06] ---
    Miss!
[21:07] ---
    Nagi! Um, there are a lot
    of reasons for this and...
[21:10] ---
    I can imagine.
[21:11] ---
    Huh?
[21:12] ---
    Ms. Katsura probably stole the lunch
[21:14] ---
    and when she got up on the railing,
[21:15] ---
    there was a strong gust that
    almost caused her to fall,
[21:18] ---
    which is when Hayate saved her,
[21:19] ---
    but the lunch paid the price for it.
[21:22] ---
    Something like that, right?
[21:23] ---
    Wh-What prodigious deductive powers...
[21:25] ---
    Well, the result is... you know...
[21:27] ---
    But thank you for coming all
    this way for me, Hayate.
[21:32] ---
    Miss!
[21:37] ---
    Now, I have grown hungry,
    so this is perfect.
[21:39] ---
    We are going home, Hayate!
[21:41] ---
    You mustn't, Miss!
[21:43] ---
    You have to attend your
    afternoon classes, too!
[21:46] ---
    But I'm hungry.
[21:48] ---
    I'll deliver another one straight away.
[21:50] ---
    But then, I won't be able to play hooky...
[21:52] ---
    School is important.
[21:54] ---
    You were in tears just a moment ago!
[21:56] ---
    No, this is part of my job as a butler.
[21:59] ---
    I must have the Miss study properly...
[22:01] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, huh?
[22:03] ---
    But...
[22:04] ---
    His infiltration of Hakuou
    Academy has come to an end.
[22:07] ---
    Next time, he will fight the comedy boom!
[22:10] ---
    Suspicious individual boy!
[22:11] ---
    And we're searching so hard for him, too...
[22:13] ---
    Bastard's quick on his feet.
[22:14] ---
    Well, and that's how we've gotten
    to play hooky with impunity...
[22:18] ---
    We truly owe it all to the
    suspicious individual.
[22:22] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[22:22] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[22:28] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[22:28] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:33] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:33] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:38] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:38] ---
    I will take from you
[22:43] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:43] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:49] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:49] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:53] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:53] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:59] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:59] ---
    Go by emptily
[23:04] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[23:04] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[23:10] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[23:10] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[23:15] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[23:15] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[23:20] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[23:20] ---
    I sought it out
[23:25] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[23:25] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:30] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:30] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:36] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:36] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:40] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:40] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:45] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:45] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    We sure have great weather again today!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Considering how warm it is,
[24:01] ---
    maybe it'll be midsummer by
    the time Golden Week is over.
[24:04] ---
    No way, right?
[24:05] ---
    'Course not, ya fool!
[24:07] ---
    Ya sure have found a fine entertainer, Nagi.
[24:09] ---
    He's a butler, damn it!
[24:11] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:13] ---
    "Thoughtless Jokes and
    Kindness Bring Misfortune."
[24:16] ---
    My friend told me that I mustn't carry
    on conversations with strangers,
[24:19] ---
    Thoughtless Jokes and
    Kindness Bring Misfortune
[24:20] ---
    and yet, I am...
[24:22] ---
    It's gonna be awesome!
[24:23] ---
    

5 - Thoughtless Jokes and Kindness Bring Misfortune

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    Having become a butler
    for the Sanzenin family,
[00:12] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki was given a top
    secret mission in the last episode.
[00:17] ---
    A mission to infiltrate the super
    prestigious Hakuou Academy.
[00:22] ---
    Hayate, I understand that you
    like high places already,
[00:26] ---
    so quickly dispatch the
    enemy and get to Nagi.
[00:29] ---
    Evil, therefore kill!
[00:29] ---
    Evil
[00:30] ---
    Therefore
[00:30] ---
    Kill
[00:31] ---
    Prepare to meet your fate!
[00:35] ---
    CLANG
[00:37] ---
    Hina?!
[00:39] ---
    Honestly! Another one of
    your nonsensical antics?!
[00:42] ---
    Hayate escaped the Academy without mishap.
[00:45] ---
    However...
[00:46] ---
    A new crisis was already drawing very near...
[00:58] ---
    It's so early in the morning...
[01:00] ---
    What could the commotion be about?
[01:06] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:09] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:12] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:15] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:19] ---
    Yes!
[01:20] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:24] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:28] ---
    Nagi, I'm gonna get a good look
    at yer new partner's abilities.
[01:35] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:35] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:41] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:41] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:48] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:48] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:51] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:51] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:56] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:56] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:00] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:00] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:04] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:04] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:09] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:09] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:12] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:12] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:19] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:19] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:26] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:26] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:29] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:29] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:32] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:32] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:38] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:38] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:45] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:45] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:03] ---
    Thoughtless Jokes and
    Kindness Bring Misfortune
[03:06] ---
    Miss, it's morning! Please wake up!
[03:10] ---
    Here you are, Miss. Your towel.
[03:13] ---
    Mm.
[03:14] ---
    Here you are. Your soup.
[03:16] ---
    Mm.
[03:18] ---
    Here you are. Your bag.
[03:19] ---
    You must change quickly and get to school...
[03:23] ---
    Hayate, it's a delightful morning, is it not?
[03:26] ---
    I agree. A delightful morning.
[03:29] ---
    On a delightful morning such
    as this, you absolutely must...
[03:32] ---
    Go back to sleep.
[03:35] ---
    Wait! Wh-What do you mean, go back to sleep?!
[03:37] ---
    Pardon me, Miss?!
[03:39] ---
    Oh, dear, it seems we have a problem.
[03:42] ---
    Maria...
[03:43] ---
    She just went yesterday,
[03:45] ---
    so I wonder if she means to stay home
    for most of this school term now.
[03:48] ---
    She was like that all of last year, too.
[03:51] ---
    Why is the Miss so terribly...
[03:53] ---
    Rather than a dislike of school, she
    has an extreme dislike of going out.
[03:57] ---
    What?
[03:58] ---
    Ever since Nagi was little,
[04:00] ---
    her life has been targeted on a daily basis
[04:02] ---
    as the only daughter of the Sanzenin family.
[04:05] ---
    And all the adults who approach her
    are only after her vast fortune.
[04:11] ---
    I see.
[04:12] ---
    And that is why she has
    grown to be so difficult.
[04:16] ---
    Of course.
[04:17] ---
    Look at me. Even the way I
    first met the Miss was...
[04:22] ---
    ...because of my ulterior motive to
    pay back my 150 million yen debt.
[04:29] ---
    But now, I am a butler, who
    serves the Sanzenin family!
[04:33] ---
    I must put my heart and
    soul into protecting her,
[04:35] ---
    so that the Miss may spend every
    day with a smile on her face!
[04:37] ---
    Um, Hayate, the contents of your
    monologue is completely audible.
[04:46] ---
    Yes, hello? Sanzenin resi...
[04:48] ---
    Oh, it has been so long! How have you been?
[04:51] ---
    Yes, she's here. Please wait one moment.
[04:54] ---
    Nagi, you have a phone call!
[04:57] ---
    From whom?
[04:58] ---
    Sakuya!
[04:59] ---
    Saku? Tell her I'm not here.
[05:02] ---
    That will not work. I already
    told her that you were here.
[05:06] ---
    Sheesh! You're hopeless...
[05:11] ---
    Oh, hello? Is that you, Nagi?
[05:13] ---
    Ping. This phone number
    is currently not in use.
[05:17] ---
    If you would like to state your business,
    leave a message after the beep
[05:20] ---
    and your house will be engulfed in flames.
[05:28] ---
    FOOL!
[05:31] ---
    Don't you hang up without
    waitin' for a response! Fool!
[05:34] ---
    It doesn't gimme a chance to talk!
[05:40] ---
    Um... uh...
[05:42] ---
    Shoot. I guess the spacin' was a
    tad too far there. Just a tad far.
[05:45] ---
    Gotta keep the spacin' tighter or
    it'll make even funny things unfunny.
[05:48] ---
    All right, time to review. Y'all
    hurry up and sit down, too.
[05:51] ---
    Hey, Maria, I want Earl
    Grey. Get me some Earl Grey.
[05:57] ---
    That's hot! That's seriously hot!
[05:57] ---
    DVD Extra!!
[05:59] ---
    That's no good! That's
    boilin' hot! Boilin' hot!
[06:01] ---
    If ya don't make it a little cooler,
    it's hard to react good! Seriously!
[06:04] ---
    You're reacting plenty, so don't worry.
[06:06] ---
    And while you're at it, please die.
[06:08] ---
    That's my future partner! Yer
    straight talk jabs are merciless.
[06:11] ---
    Yah!
[06:12] ---
    Um, who is this?
[06:15] ---
    Miss Sakuya Aizawa.
[06:17] ---
    The eldest daughter of the Aizawa family,
[06:18] ---
    which is related to the Sanzenin family.
[06:20] ---
    And a childhood friend of Nagi's.
[06:22] ---
    Childhood friend...
[06:30] ---
    So? Why are you here?
[06:32] ---
    Besides, today is a weekday.
    What happened to school?
[06:36] ---
    Don't you worry. Today's
    Foundation Day for us.
[06:39] ---
    So I took advantage of it and
    came all this way to check in.
[06:43] ---
    Check in... on what?
[06:45] ---
    Yer butler.
[06:46] ---
    I heard you've been stayin' home from school
[06:48] ---
    and havin' the time of yer
    life with yer new butler.
[06:51] ---
    So I came today to check in on him!
[06:54] ---
    To see just how funny a guy he is!
[06:56] ---
    Hah! Why would I need you to check up on him?
[06:59] ---
    Besides, you already saw Hayate just earlier.
[07:02] ---
    Huh? Earlier?
[07:05] ---
    The new butler's...
[07:07] ---
    ...an ornamental knick-knack?!
[07:08] ---
    No, no, swing the camera a
    little more to the right!
[07:12] ---
    Or rather, you're doing this
    on purpose, aren't you?!
[07:16] ---
    Wh-What?!
[07:18] ---
    You mean that fella who was just
    standin' there's the new butler?!
[07:22] ---
    Cyclamen
[07:22] ---
    I wonder if it's possible that
    girl came to see the Miss,
[07:26] ---
    because she was worried about her.
[07:31] ---
    Ah! But we sure have great
    weather again today!
[07:34] ---
    Considering how warm it is,
[07:35] ---
    maybe it'll be midsummer by
    the time Golden Week is over.
[07:38] ---
    Then maybe we'll get to see autumn leaves
    by the start of the rainy season!
[07:44] ---
    Well, no way, right?
[07:46] ---
    'Course not, ya fool!
[07:48] ---
    Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack
[07:48] ---
    Ya think a weak jab like that at
    yerself'll make that joke work?!
[07:52] ---
    Don't you underestimate comedy!
[07:54] ---
    For every joke ya crack, ya gotta
    jab like yer life depended on it!
[07:56] ---
    Um, if you keep that jab going any
    longer, Hayate is going to die...
[08:00] ---
    Huh?
[08:03] ---
    Shoot! Am I a murderer at this tender age?!
[08:06] ---
    Makita! Kunieda! Emergency treatment!
[08:09] ---
    Certainly, Miss.
[08:18] ---
    Wh-What are you doing?!
[08:20] ---
    He has come to.
[08:21] ---
    Good work.
[08:22] ---
    Damn.
[08:26] ---
    You, what's yer name?
[08:28] ---
    What?
[08:29] ---
    It's Hayate Ayasaki...
[08:31] ---
    What an ordinary name!
[08:33] ---
    Startin' today, call yerself
    "Mukitaro the Soybean Lover".
[08:36] ---
    What?!
[08:40] ---
    He's not your butler!
[08:42] ---
    Don't give him a name that sounds
    like a two-bit entertainer!
[08:44] ---
    Impressive. Everyone with hair tied
    in two parts and who has that voice
[08:48] ---
    sure are merciless when it comes to jabs.
[08:51] ---
    Eh? I not know what you mean!
[08:53] ---
    But of all of Nagi's past partners,
[08:56] ---
    he looks the poorest of
    'em all and that's a fact.
[08:59] ---
    I-I see...
[09:00] ---
    Looks like I've got no choice but
    to become sorta like the master
[09:03] ---
    and form a trio comedy group along with Nagi.
[09:06] ---
    How in the world do you twist things
    around so we end up doing that?!
[09:09] ---
    A butler doesn't need to be funny!
[09:11] ---
    Wow, so butlers are required
    to have comedic talent, too.
[09:13] ---
    What're you, a fool?!
[09:16] ---
    No, they are not. Usually.
[09:18] ---
    Ayasaki, do ya know what yer
    missin' as an entertainer?
[09:22] ---
    Huh?
[09:23] ---
    He's a butler, damn it!
[09:24] ---
    It's impact!
[09:26] ---
    For example, havin' villains out to getcha
[09:29] ---
    or havin' no problem bein' run over by a car,
[09:31] ---
    or havin' an all-out battle
    against some bizarre robot.
[09:34] ---
    It's that kinda impact that yer lackin'!
[09:38] ---
    I've pretty much done all
    those things, though...
[09:43] ---
    Don't you talk back to yer master!
[09:44] ---
    Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack
[09:46] ---
    Ridin' the comedy boom...
[09:48] ---
    Get a li'l popular, and ya think you've
    conquered the world already?! Eh?!
[09:51] ---
    You'll never become the second
    Ni-Ni or Downtown like that!
[09:55] ---
    M-Maria, is it possible that she's...
[09:59] ---
    Just like Nagi, she absolutely hates to lose.
[10:03] ---
    I-I see!
[10:04] ---
    Maybe in the Miss's world, this
    is a normal thing for them.
[10:08] ---
    But I've become a butler now, too.
[10:11] ---
    I have to come up with some
    routine that'll satisfy everyone!
[10:14] ---
    I understand, Miss Aizawa.
[10:17] ---
    I will perform a special one-off
    joke, so if you find it funny,
[10:21] ---
    let us say that I've surpassed my master!
[10:23] ---
    Mutter... Mutter... Mutter...
    Mutter... Mutter... Mutter...
[10:23] ---
    A one-off joke?!
[10:26] ---
    Will Hayate be all right?!
[10:28] ---
    That is setting the difficulty too high!
[10:31] ---
    Then, here I go.
[10:43] ---
    Get...
[10:43] ---
    Just hang tight
     for a sec, okay?
[10:45] ---
    Ya fool! Not only did ya steal
    that line, but it's frickin' old!
[10:46] ---
    I-I apologize!
[10:49] ---
    But well, I can't fault ya
    for yer go-getter attitude.
[10:52] ---
    What?
[10:54] ---
    Ya sure have found a fine entertainer, Nagi.
[10:56] ---
    He's a butler, damn it!
[10:58] ---
    With that kinda go-getter attitude,
[11:00] ---
    I'd say Nagi's in good hands.
[11:03] ---
    Miss Aizawa...
[11:05] ---
    So, you really did come
    out of worry for the Miss.
[11:07] ---
    N-No! I'll have ya know, it's not
    like ya have my approval yet!
[11:12] ---
    First up, one-liner jokes till ya drop!
[11:14] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[11:14] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[11:16] ---
    Honestly! He doesn't need to go along
    with this so conscientiously...
[11:20] ---
    But when he's smiling so guilelessy,
[11:23] ---
    Hayate looks more like the boy that he is.
[11:24] ---
    Comaneci!
[11:25] ---
    Gachoon!
[11:27] ---
    Fo!
[11:28] ---
    Swing yer hips more!
[11:29] ---
    Popping eyebrows!
[11:31] ---
    Hey, you two!
[11:33] ---
    It's getting kind of cold,
    so let's get back inside!
[11:36] ---
    Good idea.
[11:37] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[11:40] ---
    Man, I've got the chills.
[11:43] ---
    But still, it really got
    cold all of a sudden.
[11:46] ---
    It was the right decision
    not to go to school.
[11:48] ---
    What kinda reasonin' is that?
[11:49] ---
    Anyway, it's all 'cause that butler's
    jokes were so lame, they left me cold.
[11:54] ---
    Maria, would you go make us some tea?
[11:56] ---
    The thing is... We seem to have
    run out with the last pot we made.
[12:00] ---
    What?!
[12:01] ---
    This is a problem. We're to have
    an important visitor soon, too.
[12:06] ---
    Huh? Who's comin'?
[12:08] ---
    Isumi.
[12:10] ---
    C'mon now, what're you two
    doin', both skippin' school?
[12:13] ---
    Not to worry. Unlike Wataru, we get
    top grades, so it's not a problem.
[12:18] ---
    But is it gonna be all right?
[12:20] ---
    With what?
[12:21] ---
    Knowin' Isumi, ya sure
[12:22] ---
    she hasn't gotten lost and
    stranded somewhere again?
[12:27] ---
    What? On an errand?
[12:29] ---
    Would you please go for me?
[12:31] ---
    This is the shop.
[12:34] ---
    The purchase has already been paid for
[12:36] ---
    and if you let them know you're
    on Sanzenin family business,
[12:38] ---
    they will know what brand
    and what amount to give you.
[12:41] ---
    I understand! I will go right away!
[12:43] ---
    Oh, hold on a second, Hayate.
[12:45] ---
    Yes?
[12:51] ---
    When you go outside on business
    for the Sanzenin family,
[12:55] ---
    please make sure to wear that coat.
[12:57] ---
    Um, this coat...
[12:59] ---
    Could it be... cashmere?
[13:01] ---
    My! I'm impressed that you were able to tell.
[13:04] ---
    Are you sure about this?
[13:05] ---
    If I should get it dirty outside...
[13:07] ---
    This coat looks so expensive...
[13:10] ---
    What are you saying, Hayate?
[13:12] ---
    The coat doesn't just look expensive.
[13:14] ---
    It is expensive.
[13:15] ---
    What?
[13:16] ---
    After all, 100 of those coats
    could easily pay off your debt.
[13:23] ---
    So please be absolutely
    sure not to get it dirty.
[13:27] ---
    Y-Yessir.
[13:31] ---
    Smackity, smack, smack!
    (Pachi pachi panchi)
[13:35] ---
    Blood sacrifice, hurray!
    (Chimatsuri wasshoi)
[13:38] ---
    Miss!
[13:39] ---
    Miss Isumi!
[13:41] ---
    Did you find her?
[13:42] ---
    No, she is not over here!
[13:44] ---
    Hey, you two!
[13:45] ---
    I found this horrifying
    letter in the Miss's room!
[13:48] ---
    What's this?
[13:49] ---
    "I am going to visit Nagi at her home.
    I will be back by dinner. Isumi."
[13:55] ---
    This is terrible! She has
    gone outside by herself?!
[13:59] ---
    She even gets lost on the estate
    here on a regular basis...
[14:02] ---
    Yes, and I heard the daughter
    of the Sanzenin family
[14:05] ---
    was almost kidnapped just
    the other day, too...
[14:08] ---
    Damn it, find her! Find her!
[14:10] ---
    If she's about to get kidnapped...
[14:12] ---
    Beat the culprit to a pulp!
[14:14] ---
    Wearing an expensive coat
    like this makes me nervous.
[14:17] ---
    Well, I'm only going out to buy tea,
[14:19] ---
    so I doubt anything will
    happen to get it dirty.
[14:21] ---
    Released Every Week on day
    Shonen Yonday
[14:26] ---
    Oh, I am so sorry!
[14:28] ---
    I dropped paint that would leave
    a permanent stain on cashmere!
[14:31] ---
    Wha... P-Please be careful.
[14:34] ---
    Oh, watch out!
[14:35] ---
    Buckwheat noodle dip that would
    leave a permanent stain on cashmere!
[14:42] ---
    Ah, thank you. That was close, lad.
[14:45] ---
    It was nothing. Please be careful.
[14:47] ---
    Whoa, this is terrible!
[14:49] ---
    A truck piled with octopi that spit ink
[14:51] ---
    that would leave a permanent
    stain on cashmere!
[15:04] ---
    Th-This is bad.
[15:05] ---
    These cliché dangers are coming at
    me, as if they're targeting me...
[15:08] ---
    Loser Park
[15:11] ---
    If I walk through an empty park like this...
[15:13] ---
    Yes, I should be safe for now.
[15:18] ---
    Come to think of it, this is
    the park where I met Miss Nagi.
[15:23] ---
    Right, just around those vending machines...
[15:32] ---
    Please insert bills here.
SIGN    Accepts the
    new 1000 yen bills.
[15:39] ---
    Please insert bills here.
SIGN    Accepts the
     new 1000 yen bills.
[15:47] ---
    The machine... is broken.
[15:52] ---
    Um, you have to put in
    bills there, not talismans.
[15:57] ---
    This is terrible.
[15:59] ---
    Pardon?
[16:01] ---
    My friend told me that I mustn't carry
    on conversations with strangers,
[16:06] ---
    and yet, I am...
[16:08] ---
    Oh, pardon me for that.
[16:11] ---
    But it's all right.
[16:13] ---
    This friend of mine is a kind person,
[16:16] ---
    so I am sure I will be forgiven.
[16:18] ---
    Is that so? What a relief.
[16:21] ---
    Hayate's instincts, which had never
    been wrong with this sort of thing,
[16:26] ---
    told him that if he got involved
    with this girl right now,
[16:29] ---
    a great misfortune was certain
    to befall him today...
[16:32] ---
    Well, I'll be going now.
[16:34] ---
    But to think that I have gotten
    lost in a place like this...
[16:38] ---
    What?
[16:39] ---
    What in the world... am I to do...
[16:43] ---
    I must run away. I must
    run away. I must run away.
[16:46] ---
    I must run away in order to avoid misfortune.
[16:48] ---
    I must run away. I must run away!
[16:53] ---
    Um, if you'd like my help, it's yours.
[16:57] ---
    Are you well acquainted
    with the roads around here?
[17:01] ---
    No, I'm not very well acquainted, but...
[17:03] ---
    If I leave a girl like you alone, I
    feel like you might get kidnapped.
[17:08] ---
    My friend always says the same thing to me.
[17:14] ---
    Then, I would like to
    take you up on your offer
[17:16] ---
    and ask you for a bit of direction.
[17:19] ---
    Yes, please go ahead.
[17:21] ---
    Where am I going?
[17:23] ---
    What?
[17:24] ---
    There she is! Over there!
[17:28] ---
    What?!
[17:30] ---
    Who the hell are you?!
[17:32] ---
    You hand over that girl without a fight!
[17:35] ---
    Who are these suspicious people?
[17:37] ---
    Who is this suspicious boy?!
[17:40] ---
    Could it be... Kidnappers?!
    *Could it be... Kidnappers?!
[17:44] ---
    With this Japanese sword, which
    slices through cashmere coats,
[17:47] ---
    I'll strike you down!
[17:49] ---
    Get him!
[17:52] ---
    Hang on tight!
[17:57] ---
    What a fast getaway!
[18:03] ---
    Um...
[18:05] ---
    Don't worry. I'll protect you.
[18:11] ---
    So... don't worry.
[18:16] ---
    But...
[18:18] ---
    What's wrong?
[18:21] ---
    I feel as though... the area underfoot
    is incredibly precarious...
[18:27] ---
    A pond that makes cashmere coats
    really dirty if you fall into it
[18:28] ---
    It's a pond that makes cashmere coats
    really dirty if you fall into it.
[18:35] ---
    So please be absolutely
    sure not to get it dirty.
[18:38] ---
    But I can't drop this girl into the pond!
[18:47] ---
    All right!
[18:55] ---
    A-Are you okay?
[18:59] ---
    Thanks to you.
[19:06] ---
    Wh-What'll I do? This super
    luxury cashmere coat...
[19:09] ---
    It was brand new and Maria
    told me not to get it dirty...
[19:13] ---
    We have a careless protagonist.
[19:16] ---
    Shut up!
[19:17] ---
    But what should I do?
[19:18] ---
    To start with, I'll be honest and
    explain what happened to Maria...
[19:21] ---
    And successfully get yourself fired.
[19:23] ---
    I told you to shut up!
[19:24] ---
    What in the world should I do?
[19:26] ---
    Uh, um...
[19:28] ---
    Like I said, shu...
[19:30] ---
    Wha... uh... um...
[19:34] ---
    No, that's not... I mean...
[19:36] ---
    So, shu... shu... shucks, what
    do you think of "Ultraman"?
[19:40] ---
    What?
[19:41] ---
    Um...
[19:43] ---
    I like Bemster.
[19:45] ---
    What? You will?
[19:47] ---
    Yes, your precious coat has
    been ruined because of me,
[19:53] ---
    so um... I will pay for it...
[19:56] ---
    Thank you.
[19:58] ---
    I appreciate the thought, but I can't accept.
[20:01] ---
    What? But...
[20:03] ---
    This was my responsibility to begin with,
[20:05] ---
    and while things just sort of happened,
[20:07] ---
    I'm the one who promised to protect you.
[20:11] ---
    I'll protect you from those
    evil men in black. You'll see.
[20:15] ---
    Evil men in black...
[20:19] ---
    Yes.
[20:20] ---
    No, those people are...
[20:22] ---
    I know.
[20:24] ---
    They're probably an evil organization
    trying to capture you,
[20:27] ---
    so they can use you to make money.
[20:29] ---
    Um Um Um
[20:29] ---
    Oh, no, um...
[20:31] ---
    Don't worry!
[20:32] ---
    Organizations of that sort tend
    to have extensive spy networks,
[20:36] ---
    so I won't do anything careless.
[20:39] ---
    Um Um Um
[20:39] ---
    No, that is not it...
[20:41] ---
    I may not look it, but I've
    faced a lot of dangers myself,
[20:45] ---
    so you don't have to worry.
[20:47] ---
    If we do not get you dry, you
    will catch a cold and die.
[20:54] ---
    Thank you.
[20:55] ---
    But I'm fine.
[21:00] ---
    I-It was too late...
[21:03] ---
    No, no, I'm not dead yet.
[21:06] ---
    Anyway, right now, I have
    to get her somewhere safe.
[21:10] ---
    Wait, I know of just the place!
[21:15] ---
    What? This is...
[21:17] ---
    Surprised?
[21:18] ---
    But I know the person who
    lives here, so it'll be fine.
[21:22] ---
    The mistress of this estate is a
    little girl about the same age as you
[21:26] ---
    and she's a little spoiled and headstrong,
[21:29] ---
    and she can be an unmanageable
    bundle of energy sometimes,
[21:33] ---
    but she's a very kind and adorable girl.
[21:36] ---
    I am sure I will also be able to
    become very good friends with her,
[21:42] ---
    as if I have known her since we were little.
[21:45] ---
    The only thing is, I can't go
    inside due to various reasons,
[21:48] ---
    so I'll leave the rest to you!
[21:49] ---
    What?
[21:50] ---
    Ding dong dash!
[21:53] ---
    Uh, um...
[21:54] ---
    The cost of playing for the
    super luxury cashmere coat...
[21:57] ---
    The threat of being fired...
[21:59] ---
    And new enemies due to a groundless
    assumption and misunderstanding
[22:03] ---
    all descend upon him!
[22:05] ---
    Next time, he will fight all of the above
[22:07] ---
    along with the various symptoms of a cold,
[22:09] ---
    such as coughing, fever, and sore throat!
[22:14] ---
    Say, it's not a big deal, but I'm hungry.
[22:17] ---
    Patience! Be patient until Isumi gets here!
[22:21] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[22:21] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[22:27] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[22:27] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:32] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:32] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:37] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:37] ---
    I will take from you
[22:42] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:42] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:48] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:48] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:52] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:52] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:58] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:58] ---
    Go by emptily
[23:03] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[23:03] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[23:09] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[23:09] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[23:14] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[23:14] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[23:19] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[23:19] ---
    I sought it out
[23:24] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[23:24] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:29] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:29] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:35] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:35] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:39] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:39] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:44] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:44] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    Honestly! Catching a cold all of
    a sudden! How weak can you be?!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:59] ---
    While the fact that Nagi shut
    him out was the final blow,
[24:02] ---
    the original cause lies with me, so...
[24:04] ---
    It is true that the Miss delivered
    the final blow, but...
[24:07] ---
    Grr. All right!
[24:08] ---
    In that case, I will specially make
    some dish called "rice porridge"!
[24:12] ---
    What?
[24:12] ---
    What was with that? You
    didn't sound very happy.
[24:14] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:15] ---
    "You Say You Can See Time,
[24:15] ---
    You Say You Can See Time, But That Is
    Probably Your Life Flashing Before Your Eyes
[24:17] ---
    "But That Is Probably Your Life
    Flashing Before Your Eyes".
[24:18] ---
    Could it be that she used
    this, mistaking it for oil?
[24:21] ---
    You will see the tears of time.
[24:23] ---*
    

6 - You Say You Can See Time. But That Is Probably Your Life Flashing Before Your Eyes

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:13] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:17] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[00:20] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[00:23] ---
    Yes!
[00:24] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line or a girl...
[00:29] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[00:32] ---
    My name is Hayate. Earth is being targeted.
[00:35] ---
    Your life is also being targeted.
[00:39] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[00:39] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[00:45] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[00:45] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[00:52] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[00:52] ---
    Giving in to fate
[00:55] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[00:55] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:00] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:00] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:05] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:05] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:08] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:08] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:13] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:13] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:16] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:16] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[01:23] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[01:23] ---
    Just let it take you
[01:30] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[01:30] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[01:33] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[01:33] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[01:36] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[01:36] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[01:42] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[01:42] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[01:49] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[01:49] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
SIGN    You Say You Can See Time, But That Is
    Probably Your Life Flashing Before Your Eyes
[02:17] ---
    Ah, it's you, Isumi!
[02:20] ---
    You got here quicker than I expected.
[02:22] ---
    I was worried that you might
    have gotten lost again.
[02:25] ---
    I am sorry for worrying you.
[02:27] ---
    But everything is fine,
    because I did get lost.
[02:31] ---
    Oh... you did...
[02:33] ---
    Someone I believe to be your new
    butler brought me here.
[02:39] ---
    What? You met Hayate?
[02:40] ---
    He was wearing a brand new cashmere coat.
[02:43] ---
    Oh, that definitely sounds
    like it was Hayate.
[02:46] ---
    But he may end up dying if we don't hurry.
[02:50] ---
    What?!
[02:50] ---
    Is Hayate in some kind of trouble again?!
[02:53] ---
    Well, it's certainly conceivable.
[02:55] ---
    That's not good! Hayate's in a fix!
    We're going to save him, Maria!
[02:58] ---
    Uh, um...
[02:58] ---
    Perhaps it was a bad idea to make him
    wear something he wasn't used to...
[03:02] ---
    It is a cold...
[03:02] ---
    That cashmere coat, huh?
[03:03] ---
    It is certainly the first crisis he has faced
    since he became a butler.
[03:04] ---
    Never mind that, Maria! We must hurry!
[03:06] ---
    Yes!
SIGN    Cash Advance!!
[03:12] ---
    If I don't do something about this coat,
[03:16] ---
    I'll never be able to go back
    to the estate again.
[03:19] ---
    Maybe I should just borrow money
    from somewhere and get a new coat...
[03:22] ---
    No, that won't solve anything.
[03:24] ---
    Hey, Ayasaki!
[03:28] ---
    Long time no see!
[03:29] ---
    Oh! You people are...
[03:38] ---
    The "very generous people",
    who previously kindly offered
[03:41] ---
    to send me to a tropical paradise!
[03:43] ---
    Don't talk about embarrassing things
    in an expository manner on the streets.
[03:47] ---
    What the heck, you're still alive?
[03:48] ---
    Uh... yes.
[03:50] ---
    But well, if it weren't
    for our business dealings,
[03:53] ---
    I think I could've liked a guy like ya.
[03:56] ---
    What?
[03:57] ---
    Even our chance meetin'
    must've been fated somehow.
[03:59] ---
    If ya want, I'll treat ya to a meal...
[04:01] ---
    There he is!
[04:04] ---
    Hey, Ayasaki, who're these guys?
[04:06] ---
    No need to even ask. They've gotta be Mafia.
[04:09] ---
    I see. Colleagues of ours, eh?
[04:12] ---
    I thought you were suspicious
    from the start, but so you really are...
[04:15] ---
    What?! No...
[04:17] ---
    Hey, four-eyes, you got
    a problem with our boy here?
[04:20] ---
    What?! When did I become one of you?!
[04:22] ---
    I see, you seem to be determined
    to see some bloodshed.
[04:26] ---
    I don't know who you guys are,
    but you've got guts, I'll give you that.
[04:32] ---
    Wait, now that I think about it,
[04:33] ---
    I've become involved in a pretty
    nasty situation, haven't I?
[04:37] ---
    At this rate, never mind
    being reprimanded by Maria,
[04:39] ---
    I'll get chewed out
    by the authorities and stuff.
[04:41] ---
    Above all, this may cause problems
    for the Miss and the others.
[04:45] ---
    I have to escape somehow!
[04:49] ---
    Hey, where do you think
    you're going, Ayasaki?
[04:53] ---
    You're not planning on deserting
    your comrades, are you?
[04:56] ---
    As I said earlier, when
    did I become one of you?
[04:58] ---
    What?! Trying to save his own hide
    by deserting his comrades?!
[05:03] ---
    And you call yourself human?!
[05:04] ---
    What a coldhearted bastard!
[05:06] ---
    What?! I'm getting condemned
    by the other side, too?!
[05:09] ---
    Since it's come to this...
[05:10] ---
    ...I guess we've got no choice
    but to whack him.
[05:13] ---
    Oh, I get it.
[05:15] ---
    I'm going to die today.
[05:17] ---
    Man, today's just been an awful day.
[05:21] ---
    If this was how it was going to be,
[05:23] ---
    I wish I'd offered a sincere apology
    to Maria back at the estate.
[05:35] ---
    Yeah, if I make it back alive,
[05:38] ---
    I'll offer a sincere apology
    for sure this time.
[05:40] ---
    Get him!
[05:43] ---
    Here I come!
[05:49] ---
    What are you dragging your
    feet for?! We must hurry!
[05:55] ---
    Knowing Hayate, if we drag our feet,
[05:57] ---
    he may be skewered by countless
    swords before we know it!
[06:01] ---
    Surely, nothing so drastic...
[06:03] ---
    Though, the new coat may be in tatters.
[06:05] ---
    You can bet on it!
    Don't underestimate Hayate!
[06:07] ---
    No, the coat is already in tatters.
[06:10] ---
    What?
[06:11] ---
    I see. That's Hayate for you.
[06:14] ---
    The coat had gotten dirty because of me,
[06:17] ---
    but he was very troubled by it.
[06:18] ---
    It shows just how serious he is
    about his job as Nagi's butler...
[06:23] ---
    When you put it that way, we can't be
    too hard on him for ruining the coat.
[06:29] ---
    I wasn't going to be hard on him
    for it to begin with.
[06:32] ---
    Oh, he seems to have
    come home at the perfect time.
[06:36] ---
    What a hopeless guy.
[06:40] ---
    Oh, thank goodness.
    I managed to get back alive somehow.
[06:46] ---
    Maria, you are not to scold Hayate, either.
[06:49] ---
    We must give him a warm welcome.
[06:51] ---
    Well, if you say so, Nagi.
[06:54] ---
    Speaking of which,
    did Hayate say anything about me?
[06:57] ---
    What?
[06:58] ---
    You know, anything
    about me being cute or charming...
[07:02] ---
    Um... um...
[07:05] ---
    Oh, as I recall, he said you were
    a little, spoiled, headstrong,
[07:08] ---
    and an unmanageable bundle of energy...
[07:13] ---
    Oh... I'm back.
[07:15] ---
    Miss...
[07:16] ---
    What?!
[07:18] ---
    Wh-Why?! Why did you shut the door?! Miss?!
[07:22] ---
    Shut up! Stupid jerk!
[07:25] ---
    Honestly! How rude!
[07:27] ---
    But also kind and adorable.
[07:31] ---
    I think it would work better
    if you mentioned that earlier.
[07:34] ---
    And thus,
[07:36] ---
    all too soon, the butler-in-debt's
    miserable life came to an end.
[07:40] ---
    P-Please, no jokes...
SIGN    Sign: Fox Udon Dontaro
[07:52] ---
    I'm hot!
[07:55] ---
    I am sorry, it seems I am making
    such trouble for everyone...
[07:59] ---
    38.9 degrees. He's unmistakably
    come down with a cold.
[08:03] ---
    Honestly!
[08:04] ---
    The weather may have suddenly
    gotten cooler, but to catch a cold!
[08:07] ---
    How weak can you be?!
[08:09] ---
    Well, I don't know anything
    about him being weak, but...
[08:13] ---
    When someone locked him out
[08:15] ---
    to spend hours in soaking wet
    clothes in this cold weather,
[08:19] ---
    it's no wonder that he caught a cold.
[08:25] ---
    Stare...
[08:28] ---
    Stare...
[08:31] ---
    Wh-What?!
[08:32] ---
    You make it sound as though I'm the bad guy!
[08:35] ---
    Are you in pain, Hayate?
[08:39] ---
    Yes, a lot...
[08:43] ---
    Stare...
[08:44] ---
    Stare...
[08:48] ---
    Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
[08:49] ---
    Don't look at me with eyes like Kenshiro's.
[08:51] ---
    Like when he mastered the Musou Tensei!
[08:56] ---
    It was an unavoidable accident
    that you caught a cold.
[08:58] ---
    You just relax and get some rest.
[09:01] ---
    Oh, all right...
[09:03] ---
    Um, this is a milkshake.
    It will warm you up.
[09:07] ---
    Oh, thank you very much.
[09:10] ---
    It is nothing.
[09:11] ---
    While the fact that Nagi
    shut you out was the final blow,
[09:15] ---
    the original cause lies with me, so...
[09:17] ---
    This was Isumi trying to cover
    for Nagi in her own way.
[09:21] ---
    It is true that the Miss
    delivered the final blow, but...
[09:24] ---
    I had no idea that you went
    to the same school as the Miss.
[09:28] ---
    And I am the one who leapt
    to the horribly wrong conclusion...
[09:31] ---
    Oh, no, please do not let that bother you.
[09:33] ---
    Well... I'll enjoy this now.
[09:35] ---
    Yes. Though, I do not know
    if it will be to your taste...
[09:42] ---
    This is really delicious.
[09:44] ---
    I am so glad it is to your taste.
[09:46] ---
    You made this yourself, right?
    I see that you must be a good cook.
[09:50] ---
    I do not know if I am good or not,
[09:53] ---
    but I am a girl, after all.
[09:59] ---
    It's wrong to think that you should cook,
    just because you're a girl, Isumi!
[10:03] ---
    With such antiquated notions,
[10:05] ---
    you won't survive
    in the information age to come!
[10:08] ---
    Nagi, you only use big words when
    you are trying to cover up something.
[10:15] ---
    You know her so very well.
[10:17] ---
    Anyway, men and women are equal
    in the 21st century! No boundaries!
[10:21] ---
    Having said that, you still haven't
    even had lunch, right, Hayate?
[10:25] ---
    What? N-No...
[10:27] ---
    All right,
[10:28] ---
    then I shall put special effort into
    making some dish called "rice porridge".
[10:32] ---
    What?!
[10:33] ---
    What was with that?
    You didn't sound very happy.
[10:35] ---
    Or what? Are you saying you
    don't want to eat my cooking?!
[10:38] ---
    No, my heart is bursting with gratitude.
[10:41] ---
    All right, then prepare
    yourself and wait for me!
[10:44] ---
    I have read through every volume of
    "Mister Ajikko" and "Gourmand-kun".
[10:47] ---
    There is no dish that I cannot make!
[10:50] ---
    Let's go, Tama!
[10:51] ---
    M-Meow...
[10:53] ---
    What's with your weak response, too?!
[10:55] ---
    Meow...
[10:59] ---
    Then I shall go prepare
    some stomach medicine.
[11:02] ---
    Please hang in there, my dear Hayate.
[11:05] ---
    R-Right...
[11:06] ---
    And thus, Miss Nagi's
    ministrations began. However...
[11:10] ---
    No, considering how
    confident the Miss seems,
[11:14] ---
    surely her dish won't be that terrible...
[11:15] ---
    Hayate could find no way to convince
    himself that he would recover soon.
[11:20] ---
    What's this, Saku?
    I didn't know you were still here.
[11:23] ---
    I got sucked into the Downtown DVD
    box set, but then I got hungry...
[11:28] ---
    In that case, I am about to begin cooking,
[11:30] ---
    so I'll let you have a taste.
[11:32] ---
    Whoops! I've still got DVDs
    that I gotta watch.
[11:35] ---
    Where are you going?
[11:38] ---
    But since I'm going to
    the trouble of making this,
[11:40] ---
    I want to try seasoning it in a
    unique and distinctive way...
[11:44] ---
    This is the first mistake
    that amateur cooks fall for.
[11:48] ---
    Hmm, I want some punchy flavor...
[11:51] ---
    Oh, vinegar's supposed to be good for you...
[11:54] ---
    This is bad!
[11:55] ---
    If yer forced to eat Nagi's cookin',
[11:57] ---
    it won't be enough, no matter
    how many lives you've got.
[11:59] ---
    Hayate might end up dead...
[12:04] ---
    Hey, Sakuya, what do you think?
[12:05] ---
    Huh?
[12:10] ---
    But I'm so sorry about this, Isumi.
[12:12] ---
    Pardon?
[12:13] ---
    Well, you know, because Hayate has
    caused you all kinds of trouble...
[12:17] ---
    Oh, no, it was no trouble.
[12:20] ---
    But I can see why my Nagi
    put her trust in him...
[12:24] ---
    He was quite kind to me.
[12:29] ---
    Could this possibly mean...
[12:30] ---
    ...that once again, Hayate
    is spreading a kind of ailment
[12:34] ---
    that's even more troublesome than a cold?
[12:38] ---
    Welcome, Master! (Irasshaimase goshujin-sama)
[12:43] ---
    Now, now, now. (Maa, maa, maa)
[12:45] ---
    Here, it's ready, Hayate.
[12:47] ---
    I'm quite confident of how it turned out,
    so eat it with that in mind!
[12:49] ---
    Oh? This looks better than I expected.
[12:52] ---
    Is it just possible...?
[12:54] ---
    Right, then I shall enjoy it right away.
[12:59] ---
    Th-This is...
[13:01] ---
    Never mind the poor use of salt
[13:02] ---
    or that it subtly tastes like sushi rice
    or that it's not fully cooked.
[13:06] ---
    Before all that...
[13:07] ---
    I can smell the faint aroma of
    the detergent used in the kitchen.
[13:11] ---
    What is it, Hayate?
[13:12] ---
    This can no longer even be called food...
[13:15] ---
    Um, could it be that it didn't taste good?
[13:20] ---
    They say that there are times
[13:21] ---
    when a man's pride requires
    that he see something through.
[13:25] ---
    It is very... delicious.
[13:27] ---
    Kids, you must never try this at home.
[13:29] ---
    Why? Because detergent
    is neither food nor drink.
[13:32] ---
    I-I see! I'm glad to hear that!
[13:35] ---
    I hadn't tasted it, so I was worried,
    but I guess it turned out good!
[13:38] ---
    Yes, it's absolutely fantastic, Miss!
[13:41] ---
    The bit of oil I used for subtle
    flavor must have worked.
[13:45] ---
    Is that right?
[13:46] ---
    There's plenty more,
    so go ahead and eat it all.
[13:49] ---
    Oh, it's so good! Oh! My Konbu!
[13:53] ---
    You're such a glutton, Hayate!
[13:54] ---
    To live up to the mistress's expectations!
    That is what a butler does!
SIGN    OIL comes off easily!
    Marmar Lemon
[14:00] ---
    Could it be that she used this,
    mistaking it for oil?
[14:05] ---
    To live up to the mistress's expectations!
    That is what a pet does!
[14:05] ---
    Meow... Meow... Meow...
[14:09] ---
    Th-Thank you for the food...
[14:11] ---
    Ah, you really cleaned your plate!
[14:14] ---
    You must have been awfully hungry.
[14:16] ---
    Well, I'll go clean this up,
    so get some good sleep.
[14:19] ---
    Y-Yessir...
[14:24] ---
    Unfortunate things
    are always happening to me, but...
[14:26] ---
    Today was kind of amazingly
    worse than usual...
[14:31] ---
    If you push yourself too hard,
    you really will end up dead.
[14:34] ---
    Maria...
[14:38] ---
    Honestly! I'm amazed
    that you managed to eat all of that.
[14:41] ---
    What?
[14:42] ---
    Because, I mean, she put in detergent
    instead of oil by mistake, right?
[14:46] ---
    Yes, I guess...
[14:49] ---
    But the Miss worked hard to make
    that dish for me, after all.
[14:53] ---
    And besides, it made me happy
[14:55] ---
    that I had someone taking
    care me while I was sick.
[14:57] ---
    Did your mother not take care
    of you when you got sick?
[15:03] ---
    Whether her child got a fever
    or was severely injured,
[15:07] ---
    my mother was the sort
    who blithely ignored it
[15:09] ---
    and just invested in her dreams
    where the reels keep spinning.
SIGN    Sign: Lunch Money
SIGN    Sign: Mother
[15:13] ---
    Oh... that's...
[15:16] ---
    Oh, this boy! Casually mentioning
    such a depressing story...
[15:20] ---
    Well, at any rate, please
    get some rest for today, okay?
[15:23] ---
    I will, I'm so sleepy already.
[15:25] ---
    Then, good night.
[15:45] ---
    Hayate...
[15:51] ---
    Thank you.
[15:55] ---
    Excuse me, what are you doing, Miss?
[16:00] ---
    That is... With your face so close to me,
[16:03] ---
    it's hard for me to sleep...
[16:07] ---
    Shut up! Hayate, you stupid jerk!
[16:09] ---
    Oh, Miss, that's...
[16:11] ---
    Shut up! You idiot!
[16:13] ---
    They say that good people die young, but...
[16:16] ---
    I feel like I sort of understand why now.
[16:20] ---
    And thus, the poverty-stricken
    butler's hellish day came to an end.
[16:26] ---
    However...
[16:30] ---
    A good night's sleep
    and I'm completely over my cold.
[16:33] ---
    I wasn't able to do anything yesterday,
    so I better work hard today.
[16:38] ---
    Good morning.
[16:39] ---
    Huh?
[16:40] ---
    Uh... right... Good morning.
[16:44] ---
    The weather is so fine today,
    it's perfect for laundry, don't you think?
[16:47] ---
    Huh?
[16:48] ---
    Uh, yes, I agree.
[16:51] ---
    My, my, you are a Sanzenin butler,
    and yet your strong tie is crooked.
[16:57] ---
    You should pay close attention
    to your personal appearance,
[16:59] ---
    so as not to be an embarrassment
    to your mistress.
[17:02] ---
    Well, then, good day...
[17:03] ---
    Huh?!
[17:11] ---
    Uh, um...
[17:20] ---
    Who the?
[17:21] ---
    There is someone strange in the residence?
[17:24] ---
    Yes, she's wearing a maid outfit
    that's different from yours
[17:26] ---
    and she wears glasses.
[17:28] ---
    I see. Any other
    distinguishing characteristics?
[17:30] ---
    Let me think.
[17:32] ---
    If I had to say, she looks
    incredibly capable,
[17:35] ---
    but she's unmistakably a natural born klutz!
[17:37] ---
    Oh, I know!
[17:40] ---
    She is not a problem, so please go
    about your morning cleaning duties.
[17:44] ---
    I see...
[17:45] ---
    Oh, also, I believe we should
    have one other visitor,
[17:50] ---
    so when you see that person,
    please show them to the drawing room.
[17:52] ---
    Uh, yes, I understand.
[17:56] ---
    Someone from the Tachibana family is here?
[17:58] ---
    Yes, it appears Saki is here,
    so security must have let them in.
[18:05] ---
    Klaus, it's me.
[18:06] ---
    We have some suspicious
    individuals inside the residence.
[18:08] ---
    Drive them out immediately!
[18:10] ---
    That's right! I don't care how you do it!
[18:12] ---
    I'll even permit
    the non-lethal use of firearms!
[18:15] ---
    Uh, um...
[18:16] ---
    Just get rid of them right away! That's all!
[18:18] ---
    There's no need to actually kick them out...
[18:21] ---
    But... I don't want Hayate to know!
[18:27] ---
    She said we should have another visitor...
[18:33] ---
    Aw, man, I wish the Earth
    would just get destroyed.
[18:36] ---
    Wh-What is with this boy,
    muttering such disturbing things...
[18:41] ---
    E-Excuse me...
[18:42] ---
    Huh? Who the hell are you?
[18:44] ---
    Don't talk so familiarly to me
    with your poor-looking face, moron!
[18:48] ---
    Um... Um...
[18:50] ---
    Oh, I see!
[18:51] ---
    Maybe this most impudent child
    is the guest Maria was talking about.
[18:56] ---
    I swear! I'm in the crappiest mood!
[18:59] ---
    I'm just bored, so would you go jump
    into that pond for me?
[19:02] ---
    Oh, certainly. Wait... What?!
[19:04] ---
    Left your guard down!
[19:11] ---
    If you're a butler, you should
    dodge easy attacks like that.
[19:14] ---
    You can't protect your mistress
    if you're that feeble.
[19:16] ---
    Oh! W-Wait a moment, please!
[19:19] ---
    What? You got some problem with me?
[19:22] ---
    No, I was told to show our visitor
    to the drawing room, so...
[19:26] ---
    Wow, so you're not gonna get mad?
[19:28] ---
    Even after I pushed you around like that...
[19:31] ---
    I'm used to it, so...
[19:33] ---
    Young Sir, so this is where you were!
[19:36] ---
    Who cares where the heck I go?
[19:37] ---
    "Young Sir"?
[19:38] ---
    By the way, Young Sir,
    I have a bit of a question.
[19:41] ---
    Huh? If it's about this guy,
    I don't know anything.
[19:44] ---
    No, that is not it.
[19:46] ---
    What in the world is
    that machine behind you...?
SIGN    Security 8801
[19:53] ---
    What the?! It's floating!
[19:56] ---
    It has a Minovsky drive?!
[19:57] ---
    Beep! Target sighted!
    Immediately moving to eliminate!
[20:02] ---
    Eliminate!
[20:02] ---
    What?!
[20:03] ---
    Eliminate! Eliminate!
[20:06] ---
    What the hell is that thing?!
[20:07] ---
    I do not know! That is why I asked you!
[20:09] ---
    Like I'd know anything about
    some stupid Sanzenin mecha!
[20:12] ---
    Beep!
[20:13] ---
    Target sighted!
[20:15] ---
    Gack! More from the front!
[20:17] ---
    Ugh... I don't know what's going on,
[20:19] ---
    but as a Sanzenin family butler,
[20:21] ---
    I have to safely escort our visitors
    to the drawing room!
[20:23] ---
    Please hang on tight!
[20:25] ---
    You...!
[20:26] ---
    Please rest easy.
[20:27] ---
    As a Sanzenin butler, the one thing
    I will ensure is safety for our guests...
[20:30] ---
    Never mind that! Don't hold me
    against your sopping wet clothes!
[20:33] ---
    What?!
[20:34] ---
    Th-That is right!
[20:35] ---
    T-To handle a girl's body so familiarly...
[20:39] ---
    I-It's depraved!
[20:40] ---
    I-I see, pardon me...
[20:42] ---
    Y-You can't do this!
    If you struggle like that in the air...
[20:54] ---
    Well, I certainly did ask you
    to show them to the drawing room, but...
[20:58] ---
    You didn't have to bring them
    in through the ceiling...
[21:01] ---
    M-My apologies...
[21:03] ---
    I told you, that's cold!
[21:05] ---
    Please let me go already!
[21:07] ---
    What will I do if I become
    ruined for marriage?!
[21:09] ---
    Right...
[21:11] ---
    So, who in the world are these people?
[21:14] ---
    What?
[21:17] ---
    This boy is Wataru Tachibana
[21:21] ---
    and he is Nagi's... betrothed.
[21:24] ---
    Huh?
[21:24] ---
    Wataru, a mysterious boy, who has come
    to see Nagi, and his maid, Saki.
[21:29] ---
    And Isumi.
[21:30] ---
    Is Wataru really betrothed to Nagi?
[21:33] ---
    With signs of even more troubling
    times in the next episode,
[21:35] ---
    he will battle the vast
    subterranean labyrinth of Tokyo,
[21:37] ---
    the underground!
[21:39] ---
    Oh, hmm... Hold on a sec,
    there was one more person here.
[21:46] ---
    That's so stupid!
[21:48] ---
    Why the heck?!
[21:49] ---
    To be continued next time!
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:03] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:03] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:13] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:13] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:19] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:19] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:23] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:23] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:29] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:29] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:34] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:34] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:40] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:40] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:45] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:45] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:50] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:50] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:00] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:00] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:06] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:06] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:15] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:15] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    Hello, I'm Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:32] ---
    I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    We've just started this segment today,
    but what exactly is this segment for?
[23:36] ---
    In this segment, we'll follow your
    progress as you become a fine butler
[23:38] ---
    and take a stand against a gigantic evil!
[23:41] ---
    A gigantic evil?
[23:41] ---
    By the way, what's this song
    playing in the background?
[23:44] ---
    Ah, yes, this is my image song,
    composed by the famous maestro.
[23:48] ---
    It perfectly conveys my
    desire to protect you!
[23:51] ---
    Ah, is that right?
    I'll be counting on you, Hayate.
[23:53] ---
    Yes, Miss.
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
SIGN    Preview
[23:57] ---
    You're Nagi's new butler, right?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Uh, yes, my name is Hayate Ayasaki...
[24:02] ---
    Since we're here anyway,
    how about a little duel before breakfast?
[24:06] ---
    Um, is it the norm for the rich and
    famous to have duels in the morning?
[24:10] ---
    I don't really get it, but he probably
    wants to show off how cool he is.
[24:13] ---
    Well, just beat the crap out of him for now.
[24:15] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:17] ---
    "A Man's Fight".
[24:18] ---
    Ready to meet your fate, you stupid butler?!
[24:19] ---
    A Man's Fight
[24:20] ---
    Take this!
[24:22] ---
    Lots more fan service coming next time!

7 - A Man's Fight

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:11] ---
    After a quick bit of fan service,
[00:14] ---
    we begin with a summary of the last episode.
[00:16] ---
    Accompanied by his maid,
    a mysterious boy has come to see Nagi.
[00:21] ---
    What might his true identity be?
[00:27] ---
    This boy is Wataru Tachibana
[00:30] ---
    and he is Nagi's... betrothed.
[00:34] ---
    Huh?
[00:35] ---
    That is all. End of summary.
[00:38] ---
    That's no good, mister.
[00:40] ---
    Ya gotta get over yer bashfulness!
[00:41] ---
    Ya can't win scenes for yerself like this.
[00:43] ---
    I-I see...
[00:46] ---
    Listen up. What yer character
    lacks is punch, Mr. Klaus.
[00:49] ---
    The comedic drive to step forward,
    even if ya hafta push people aside.
[00:54] ---
    Okay, here goes.
[00:55] ---
    Oh, my glasses, my glasses...
[00:57] ---
    My glasses, my glasses,
    my glasses, my glasses...
[01:02] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:05] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:08] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:11] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[01:15] ---
    Yes!
[01:16] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[01:20] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:26] ---
    I hope I get more screen time.
[01:27] ---
    That's all for today.
[01:31] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:31] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:37] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:37] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:44] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:44] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:47] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:47] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:52] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:52] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:56] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:56] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:00] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:00] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:05] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:05] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:08] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:08] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:15] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:15] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:22] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:22] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:25] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:25] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:28] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:28] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:34] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:34] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:41] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:41] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:59] ---
    A Man's Fight
[03:04] ---
    Um, betrothed, as in...
[03:06] ---
    Like a husband-to-be
    determined by her parents...?
[03:08] ---
    Yes, that makes him her fiancé.
[03:12] ---
    I see.
[03:14] ---
    But Miss, I had no idea you had
    an official boyfriend.
[03:18] ---
    Y-You're wrong! Don't misunderstand!
[03:19] ---
    He's not my boyfriend,
    but my betrothed! My betrothed!
[03:22] ---
    In other words, it's something
    our families decided on their own,
[03:24] ---
    so... um...
[03:26] ---
    No, really, I'm so surprised
    that you're betrothed.
[03:30] ---
    A young lady of the upper class
    certainly has it different.
[03:33] ---
    To Nagi, his smile...
[03:35] ---
    You never told me you were betrothed!
[03:38] ---
    Was our relationship just a game to you?!
[03:41] ---
    ...apparently looked like that.
[03:45] ---
    Hayate's pretty angry.
[03:47] ---
    I must resolve the
    misunderstanding, no matter what!
[03:49] ---
    But are they sure about this?
[03:50] ---
    If the Miss marries into his family,
[03:52] ---
    won't that be the end of the Sanzenin name?
[03:55] ---
    There is no problem in that regard.
[03:57] ---
    Since Nagi will not be the one
    to marry into his family.
[03:58] ---
    Oh, so the Miss will receive Wataru
    into the family as her husband.
[04:03] ---
    Like hell I'm being received
    as Nagi's husband!
[04:05] ---
    But such a thing does not happen often.
[04:07] ---
    An opportunity to marry
    an adorable girl like Miss Nagi...
[04:12] ---
    Hayate...
[04:13] ---
    Hah! A selfish, spoiled,
    irresponsible manga nerd,
[04:16] ---
    who thinks she's the boss of this world!
[04:19] ---
    Like anyone would want her!
[04:21] ---
    Wh-What?!
[04:22] ---
    Like hell I'm taking that
    from a brat like you,
[04:25] ---
    you stupid, stupid, stupid!
[04:26] ---
    That's my like, you ugly, ugly, ugly!
[04:31] ---
    Wow, I guess people who are
    betrothed really do get along.
[04:32] ---
    Ugly! Ugly!
[04:34] ---
    Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
[04:35] ---
    If that looks like they're
    getting along to you,
[04:36] ---
    you should go see an eye
    doctor or brain surgeon.
[04:38] ---
    And you! Can't you be
    at least a little more ladylike?!
[04:42] ---
    Wataru.
[04:44] ---
    Th-That voice... Don't tell me...
[04:50] ---
    Good morning, Wataru.
[04:52] ---
    What are you doing so early in the morning?
[04:54] ---
    Well... uh... Isumi...
[04:57] ---
    Could it be because you also heard
    that Nagi had a new butler?
[05:02] ---
    W-Well, I myself was of a similar mind.
SIGN    I Myself
[05:05] ---
    "I myself"?!
[05:06] ---
    But I just heard some loud noises...
[05:10] ---
    Could it be that you were
    fighting with Nagi?
[05:12] ---
    N-Not at all! We would never fight!
[05:15] ---
    Nagi and I always get along famously!
[05:17] ---
    What's with the drastic
    change in his persona?
[05:20] ---
    Well, basically...
[05:22] ---
    It means that Wataru likes Isumi.
[05:25] ---
    What?! He likes someone else
    when he's betrothed?!
[05:29] ---
    Well, it's not a betrothal
    that they wanted for themselves.
[05:32] ---
    Then, does the Miss want to
    break off her betrothal to Wataru?
[05:36] ---
    Of course, I do!
[05:38] ---
    As if we could marry when
    we don't even like each other!
[05:41] ---
    If Isumi comes to like Wataru,
    it would solve everything,
[05:45] ---
    but regrettably, Wataru doesn't
    register on Isumi's radar at all.
[05:48] ---
    So, whatever the case,
    if Wataru and Isumi become an item,
[05:51] ---
    the betrothal will be off, correct?
[05:53] ---
    Yes! It seems you finally understand!
[05:55] ---
    Everyone, we haven't eaten this morning,
[05:57] ---
    
    so how about some breakfast?
[05:59] ---
    Would you prefer
    a Japanese breakfast, Isumi?
[06:02] ---
    What?
[06:03] ---
    W-Well...
[06:07] ---
    Then, whichever you prefer,
    my dear Hayate...
[06:10] ---
    I-Isumi! Don't tell me
    you have feelings for him?!
[06:13] ---
    Then everyone, please head
    towards the dining room.
[06:16] ---
    Hold it right there!
[06:18] ---
    You're Nagi's new butler, right?
SIGN    RROOAARR
[06:21] ---
    Uh, yes, my name is Hayate Ayasaki...
[06:24] ---
    Since we're here, how about
    a little duel before breakfast?
[06:37] ---
    Um, is it the norm for the rich and
    famous to have duels in the morning?
[06:41] ---
    Who knows?
[06:42] ---
    I don't really get it,
[06:43] ---
    but he probably wants to
    show off how cool he is to Isumi.
[06:46] ---
    Even though it's a waste of time.
[06:47] ---
    Well, if he loses really badly,
    he may gain Isumi's sympathy,
[06:51] ---
    so beat the crap out of him.
[06:53] ---
    Uh, right...
[06:57] ---
    All right, ready to meet your fate,
    you stupid butler?!
[06:59] ---
    I'll warn you, though. Hayate's strong.
[07:02] ---
    After all, he can catch up
    to a car on a bicycle.
[07:04] ---
    Don't be ridiculous!
[07:06] ---
    There's no way a poor-looking
    guy like him is strong!
[07:09] ---
    Do you have any experience with sabers?
[07:11] ---
    Hmm, let's see...
[07:16] ---
    Well, that's about
    the best I can do with it.
[07:20] ---
    Hey, what do you want to do?
[07:21] ---
    Sh-Shut up!
[07:24] ---
    O-Once a man's decided to do something,
[07:27] ---
    there's no going back!
[07:29] ---
    Oh, boy...
[07:30] ---
    I know what the Miss asked me to do, but...
[07:34] ---
    Hold on.
[07:34] ---
    If I can neatly bring the two of them
    to an understanding...
[07:43] ---
    Wind Scar!
[07:49] ---
    Isumi, be with me...
[07:50] ---
    Yes, I will marry you!
[07:52] ---
    Yay! The betrothal's off!
[07:55] ---
    Excellent work, Hayate!
[07:57] ---
    All right, it's settled then!
[08:00] ---
    Here I come!
[08:01] ---
    Please watch this, Miss!
[08:03] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki's greatest
    performance of his life!
[08:07] ---
    Take this!
[08:09] ---
    But...
[08:11] ---
    Sharp instruments are dangerous,
    so let's still get that out of the way...
[08:15] ---
    Whoa, he got me!
[08:19] ---
    Thud.
[08:26] ---
    Huh? That's odd.
[08:27] ---
    That should've set the flag
    for a happy ending...
[08:30] ---
    Oh, my dear Hayate...
[08:33] ---
    To think you would lose on purpose,
[08:35] ---
    so as not to hurt the pride
    of the violent and weak Wataru.
[08:39] ---
    How kind of you...
[08:42] ---
    N-Not at all!
[08:43] ---
    Wataru is truly strong
    and I didn't stand a chance!
[08:49] ---
    Huh? Oh, wait...
[08:51] ---
    I'm... never... letting you
    get away with that...
[08:56] ---
    I'll defeat you for sure someday!
[08:59] ---
    Remember this! You idiot!
[09:02] ---
    Th-This wasn't how it was supposed to be...
[09:04] ---
    Goodness. To think he psychologically
    beat the crap out of him...
[09:07] ---
    Hayate really is good.
[09:09] ---
    Or rather, that cheap performance...
[09:12] ---
    Is he still angry that I didn't
    tell him that I was betrothed?
[09:17] ---
    Wataru has left the estate by himself.
[09:20] ---
    Incidentally, as for his maid's bath...
[09:25] ---
    The water was quite fine.
[09:28] ---
    She was in there so long,
    the first half has already ended.
[09:34] ---
    Tell me you love me.
    (Aishiteiru to itte kure)
[09:38] ---
    Love beam! (Renai biimu)
[09:40] ---
    I still think it would be better
    if I went to apologize to him.
[09:44] ---
    What I did to Wataru was inexcusable.
[09:47] ---
    Well, certainly,
[09:49] ---
    I do feel a little sorry for him
    to leave things like this, but...
[09:53] ---
    Leave it, leave it.
[09:54] ---
    Besides, for a boy
    to cry in front of others...
[09:57] ---
    How weak could he be?
[09:58] ---
    My, that is awful! Calling him weak...
[10:01] ---
    It is the truth, but since he made
    Wataru cry, he should apologize.
[10:04] ---
    You're the one who made him cry, though.
[10:06] ---
    S-So, given that I am going to apologize,
[10:09] ---
    where will I be able to
    find Wataru's estate?
[10:12] ---
    What? Isn't that more
    of a building than an estate?
[10:16] ---
    Yes, because Wataru lives
[10:18] ---
    at the top of the Tachibana
    Group's Shinjuku Headquarters.
[10:21] ---
    Wow, he's in the middle of downtown?
[10:24] ---
    Then, the roads will be congested
    at this hour in the morning...
[10:30] ---
    I suppose taking the train
    would be faster than driving.
[10:34] ---
    Huh? Did I say something wrong?
[10:37] ---
    The train... Isumi, have you
    ever been on one?
[10:40] ---
    I have ridden the Orient Express
    and the Siberian Express, but...
[10:44] ---
    Not any in Japan...
[10:46] ---
    Right?
[10:47] ---
    Besides, there aren't all
    that many trains running, right?
[10:50] ---
    Then, what's that?
[10:54] ---
    This is a game. A game.
[10:56] ---
    Could it be that you have
    never ridden a train, Miss?!
[10:59] ---
    No, she hasn't.
[11:00] ---
    But were there that many
    bullet train stations in Tokyo?
[11:04] ---
    Huh?! The bullet train?!
[11:05] ---
    What?! By train, you weren't
    referring to the bullet train?
[11:10] ---
    Um, excuse my abrupt question,
[11:13] ---
    but do you ladies know what the "subway" is?
[11:15] ---
    The subway?
[11:16] ---
    Yes, like the Oedo Line
    or the Marunouchi Line.
[11:18] ---
    They are trains that run underground.
SIGN    Murmur
[11:22] ---
    So, there are bullet trains
    running underground in Tokyo?
[11:25] ---
    No, there are trains other
    than bullet trains!
[11:29] ---
    So, underground, what kind
    of scenery do you see outside?
[11:32] ---
    No, there is nothing to see!
[11:34] ---
    I thought they're only
    for transporting Koubu
[11:35] ---
    and ordinary people couldn't ride them!
[11:37] ---
    That was just during the Taisho era!
[11:39] ---
    Ah, that sounds interesting.
[11:41] ---
    I had no intention
    of going to Wataru's place,
[11:43] ---
    but I'd like to take a ride
    on this so-called subway.
[11:45] ---
    All right, we are going to ride
    this subway thing, Hayate!
SIGN    Sanzenin
[11:50] ---
    B-But will it be all right?
[11:52] ---
    Getting on such a strange vehicle
    with just the children...
[11:54] ---
    At Shinjuku Station alone,
[11:56] ---
    approximately 570,000 people get
    on this strange vehicle every day.
SIGN    °Research by Hayate
[12:00] ---
    Incidentally, the breakdown of that is...
[12:02] ---
    ...230,000 people
    on the Metro Shinjuku Line,
[12:04] ---
    100,000 people on the Oedo Line,
[12:05] ---
    and 240,000 people on the Marunouchi Line.
[12:07] ---
    That is all for the explanation.
[12:09] ---
    Ah, you're so knowledgeable, Hayate!
[12:11] ---
    You see that? Nothing to worry about.
[12:13] ---
    Besides, we may get to see
    subterranean people or living dinosaurs!
[12:17] ---
    Th-That is why I'm saying it's dangerous!
[12:20] ---
    W-Well, we have Isumi along with us also,
[12:22] ---
    so I will escort them carefully
    to keep from getting lost.
[12:25] ---
    Speaking of Isumi,
    where in the world is she?
[12:28] ---
    What?
[12:29] ---
    Could she have gotten lost already?!
[12:31] ---
    Oh, no! We only looked away
    for just a moment!
[12:33] ---
    I underestimated Isumi's abilities.
[12:36] ---
    To start with, Maria, contact security.
[12:38] ---
    Hayate and I will search nearby!
[12:41] ---
    Right!
[12:42] ---
    Oh, wait, Nagi!
[12:48] ---
    I think Isumi probably headed
    for that so-called subway, but...
[12:52] ---
    That's terrible! There are numerous
    subway stations in Tokyo alone!
[12:56] ---
    No, the "subway" in this case
    is Isumi's idea of the "subway".
[13:00] ---
    So, I'd give it a 90 chance that
    she hasn't made it to the real subway.
[13:00] ---
    Rum raisin! Triple on a regular cone!
[13:04] ---
    I-Is that so?
[13:07] ---
    Yeah, Isumi never makes it
    to her destination on her own!
[13:12] ---
    So there will be no mistake
    if you follow me.
[13:15] ---
    Where Isumi has gone
[13:16] ---
    will be the closest place around
    that resembles the subway!
[13:20] ---
    Wait, no, no, no.
    Where in the world are we, Miss?
[13:24] ---
    Wh-Who knows?
[13:26] ---
    Earlier, I found a construction guy
    who sounded like he'd seen Isumi...
SIGN    A While Ago
[13:29] ---
    Um, is this the entrance to the subway?
[13:33] ---
    Eh?
[13:34] ---
    The subway, where they transport
    dinosaurs using bullet trains...
[13:38] ---
    Oh sure, it's definitely underground, but...
[13:40] ---
    Well, there are all kinds of unknown
    worlds sprawled under Tokyo
[13:43] ---
    that even the government
    doesn't know everything about,
[13:46] ---
    so you just might find...
[13:47] ---
    Wait, huh?! Missy?!
[13:49] ---
    So, I bought out the construction site
    and we went underground with security.
[13:54] ---
    I think that part went fine, but...
[14:00] ---
    Th-That's a Griffon!
[14:07] ---
    A trick of the light...
[14:08] ---
    Part of me almost wishes it was
    and part of me doesn't...
[14:11] ---
    Miss, where are you?!
[14:14] ---
    At any rate, we should go back for now.
[14:16] ---
    Or we'll get lost for real, too.
[14:19] ---
    M-Miss?
[14:21] ---
    Y-You fool! Don't change
    directions so suddenly!
[14:24] ---
    I thought you were leaving me behind!
[14:26] ---
    I don't handle dark places
    like this too well...
[14:29] ---
    So please don't make any sudden moves.
[14:32] ---
    But Miss...
[14:34] ---
    Then, what do you do at night?
[14:36] ---
    Might you have trouble
    sleeping alone at night?
[14:39] ---
    No, wait... it's not...
[14:40] ---
    I-It's not as if I can't sleep alone...
[14:44] ---
    I'm not a child, after all.
[14:46] ---
    I just have a hard time
    falling asleep sometimes...
[14:49] ---
    And if there's a power outage,
    it gets pitch dark,
[14:51] ---
    so it's kind of dangerous,
    you know... like...
[14:53] ---
    Well, what does it matter?
[14:56] ---
    It's cuter when you
    have qualities like that.
[15:02] ---
    But that was a bit of a mistake.
[15:05] ---
    You see, you shouldn't yell
    in underground spaces like this.
[15:12] ---
    When you yell, they get scared
    and come leaping out...
[15:26] ---
    I-Isumi!
[15:28] ---
    Thank goodness! Let's run together!
[15:30] ---
    If we don't hurry, they'll...
[15:35] ---
    Oh, dear...
[15:38] ---
    You are making a bit of a ruckus...
SIGN    Stopped
[15:43] ---
    Huh?
[15:51] ---
    My, how smart you are.
[15:52] ---
    Huh?! What?!
[15:53] ---
    Wh-What was that just now?!
[15:56] ---
    Thus, our dreams of the subway were crushed.
[16:00] ---
    That's so stupid!
[16:02] ---
    Dinosaurs? Subterranean men?
[16:03] ---
    Like they exist.
[16:05] ---
    I see...
[16:07] ---
    Listen to me. The subway
    actually leads to Brazil.
[16:11] ---
    What? Brazil?
[16:13] ---
    That's right. That place is on
    the other side of Japan, right?
[16:16] ---
    So it connects us to 'em.
[16:18] ---
    Only thing ya gotta be careful of is
    that Brazil's a foreign country, right?
[16:21] ---
    So, ya gotta show yer passport.
[16:24] ---
    Next time ya have occasion
    to ride the subway,
[16:26] ---
    show yer passport to the station staff
[16:28] ---
    and say, "One child's ticket
    to Rio de Janeiro please."
[16:31] ---
    Got it?
[16:32] ---
    I understand, Sakuya. Thank you.
[16:35] ---
    Hayate, if you're still going to
    insist on apologizing to Wataru,
[16:39] ---
    I want you to give this to him.
[16:41] ---
    What? What is this?
[16:43] ---
    You mustn't open it on your
    way there, no matter what.
[16:45] ---
    Since there's no knowing
    who may be watching.
[16:48] ---
    What?
[16:51] ---
    Wow...
[16:54] ---
    It's the city...
[16:56] ---
    But still...
[16:57] ---
    What is this?
[16:58] ---
    It's not something to get rid
    of her betrothed, is it?
[17:00] ---
    Like a bomb or something...?
[17:02] ---
    Oh? If it isn't the Sanzenin family butler.
[17:07] ---
    Oh, Saki.
[17:09] ---
    Fancy meeting you here.
[17:11] ---
    Have you come to see the Young Sir?
[17:13] ---
    Oh, yes, just dropping by.
[17:15] ---
    Also, I'm delivering
    something from the Miss.
[17:17] ---
    In that case, I shall show you the way.
[17:20] ---
    What? Really? Thank you very much.
[17:25] ---
    Huh?
[17:27] ---
    Oh, our headquarters is this way,
    so please be sure to follow me.
[17:31] ---
    Oh, right...
[17:33] ---
    I don't really get it,
    but is Saki avoiding me?
[17:37] ---
    Um, Saki...
[17:42] ---
    What... the?
[17:45] ---
    P-Pardon me! Um, it's not
    that I'm avoiding you!
[17:47] ---
    So, um, you know...
[17:48] ---
    I'd never been held like
    that by a man before,
[17:51] ---
    so I sort of end up shying away by reflex...
[17:54] ---
    Oh, no, I don't mean you!
    I mean men in general!
[17:57] ---
    It doesn't really bother me.
[17:59] ---
    I'm used to people hating me anyway...
[18:01] ---
    No... uh... I'm sorry!
[18:08] ---
    We're here. This is it.
[18:10] ---
    What?
SIGN    Video Rental Video Tachibana
[18:15] ---
    Um, isn't this a video rental store?
[18:17] ---
    It is.
[18:22] ---
    Young Sir, I have returned.
[18:24] ---
    Ah, Saki, thanks.
[18:31] ---
    What the hell are you here for?!
[18:33] ---
    N-No, I brought this to you from the Miss.
[18:36] ---
    Oh, the videos that I lent Nagi.
[18:38] ---
    Videos?
[18:40] ---
    Yeah, this is the Entertainment
    Division of the Tachibana Group.
[18:44] ---
    The Shinjuku flagship store
    of Rental Video Tachibana.
[18:46] ---
    The Tachibana Group itself
[18:48] ---
    is almost dead due to
    the recent economic downturn.
[18:51] ---
    This rental store chain
    is their last holdout now.
[18:53] ---
    Saki, don't say such unnecessary things.
[18:56] ---
    Then, the fact you're betrothed is...
[18:58] ---
    Yeah, it means my parents
    are counting on Nagi's family fortune.
[19:03] ---
    They're used to being wealthy,
[19:05] ---
    so they're scared of no
    longer having a fortune.
[19:08] ---
    But where's the point in thinking
    about things so negatively?
[19:10] ---
    Just watch!
[19:12] ---
    I'll make this store huge
[19:14] ---
    and amass a fortune that'll
    dwarf the Sanzenin family!
[19:17] ---
    Like hell I'm being taken
    into the family as a husband!
[19:20] ---
    If I do that, I'm sure Isumi will also...
[19:26] ---
    This boy has a foul mouth,
    but he's a really good kid.
[19:30] ---
    That's why I can't just let him be.
[19:32] ---
    Saki, don't just stand there! Get to work!
[19:34] ---
    Oh, yes, sir!
[19:37] ---
    Rental video... So, is what
    I just delivered also...?
[19:40] ---
    Yeah, our goods.
[19:42] ---
    But as rich as the Miss is,
[19:44] ---
    surely she could just buy it
    instead of bothering to rent it.
[19:47] ---
    You're so naive!
[19:48] ---
    There're some extra-rare titles in
    this world that aren't on the market.
[19:53] ---
    Th-Then, are those DVDs also...?
[19:55] ---
    Yeah, this is Gurren Lag...
SIGN    Tachibana
[19:58] ---
    Bamboo! Bamboo poles!
[20:03] ---
    So you see, we've got
    a collection of treasures
[20:05] ---
    that we can't mention out loud.
[20:07] ---
    The genres are anime
    and special effects, of course!
[20:10] ---
    B-But isn't it illegal to rent them out
    in exchange for payment?
[20:13] ---
    No problem. I'm only showing
    off to Nagi privately.
SIGN    Wataru Only
[20:19] ---
    But someday, I'm going to surpass her
    with the power of money.
[20:24] ---
    Um, I'm really sorry about the other day.
[20:29] ---
    By way of apology, please allow me
    to become a member of this store.
[20:33] ---
    Well, a customer's a customer.
[20:37] ---
    Ayasaki, was it? I'll waive the sign-up fee.
[20:41] ---
    Huh?
[20:42] ---
    You're already registered as a member.
[20:44] ---
    What?
[20:45] ---
    Th-That can't be!
[20:46] ---
    I mean, I've never joined
    a rental membership before!
[20:50] ---
    But this photo's you, right?
[20:52] ---
    Shun Ayasaki...
[20:53] ---
    Huh? The name's different...
SIGN    Name
SIGN    Shun Ayasaki
SIGN    Legal Domicile
SIGN    Tokyo
SIGN    Address
SIGN    Tokyo
SIGN    Issued
SIGN    June 2, Heisei Year 17
[20:56] ---
    My old man?!
[21:00] ---
    There are a total of 158 videos
    that haven't been returned.
[21:03] ---
    At 200 yen per video per day...
[21:06] ---
    Um, the late fees come out
    to exactly 1.58 million yen...
[21:13] ---
    I have returned.
[21:15] ---
    Ah, good work.
[21:16] ---
    Wait, what happened? You look so pale.
[21:20] ---
    For now, I settled things so
    I pay him back for the tapes...
[21:24] ---
    In installments.
[21:25] ---
    Huh?
[21:25] ---
    Right around the time
    when Hayate's debt increased...
[21:29] ---
    There were yet more people
    having a miserable experience.
[21:32] ---
    One child's ticket to Rio de Janeiro please.
[21:35] ---
    Pardon?
[21:37] ---
    To Rio de Janeiro in Brazil.
[21:40] ---
    Um...
[21:42] ---
    For someone unable to discern
    when they are being lied to,
[21:44] ---
    it is difficult to survive
    in our modern society.
[21:47] ---
    But let's just say that as people,
    it's best to have an honest attitude,
[21:49] ---
    so see you again next time.
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:03] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:03] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:13] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:13] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:19] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:19] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:23] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:23] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:29] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:29] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:34] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:34] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:40] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:40] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:45] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:45] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:50] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:50] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:00] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:00] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:05] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:05] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:15] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:15] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    Hayate, you've settled into
    your role as a butler pretty nicely.
[23:33] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[23:35] ---
    Having said that,
    you still need more training.
[23:37] ---
    This is no time to be singing, all carefree.
[23:39] ---
    R-Right...
[23:40] ---
    To start with, let's do special training,
[23:42] ---
    so you're ready no matter
    when some ancient supermen
[23:44] ---
    or diabolical supermen come attacking.
[23:45] ---
    What?! Supermen original to the anime?!
[23:47] ---
    That's right!
[23:48] ---
    You never know when the anime
    version of "Hayate the Combat Butler"
[23:51] ---
    will get its own original
    supermen, after all!
[23:53] ---
    What?! Really?!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    Say, Hayate, I have a favor to ask.
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Yes, what might that be?
[24:01] ---
    Would you try these clothes on for me?
[24:03] ---
    Um, no matter how you look at it,
    that's a sailor uniform, right?
[24:07] ---
    Oh, Nagi! And here I was
    wondering what you were up to.
[24:09] ---
    Maria!
[24:10] ---
    This frilly outfit is sure
    to look good on Hayate!
[24:13] ---
    NOOO!!!
[24:16] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:17] ---
    "Going to Hell in Cat-Ear Mode".
[24:19] ---
    Going to Hell in Cat-Ear Mode
[24:19] ---
    For the future of Earth,
    I am at your service, meow!

8 - Going to Hell in Cat-Ear Mode

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:09] ---
    Whew, I'm super stuffed!
[00:12] ---
    No matter how often I taste it,
    Maria's cookin's still the best!
[00:15] ---
    Even so, you ate way too much.
[00:17] ---
    I'll have ya know, comedy's about stamina.
[00:19] ---
    Yer body's yer capital.
[00:21] ---
    If ya don't eat well,
    you'll never get a laugh!
[00:24] ---
    I don't ever plan to try.
[00:25] ---
    Now, if you're done eating, get out of here!
[00:28] ---
    Ya don't need to tell me. I'm leavin'.
[00:30] ---
    Unlike you, I do the whole
    "serious student" thing.
[00:33] ---
    Makita! Kunieda!
[00:35] ---
    All right, I'm off to school!
[00:39] ---
    School, school! What an annoying girl!
[00:41] ---
    Miss, you'll also need to
    get ready soon, or you'll be late.
[00:45] ---
    Don't be ridiculous! Isumi's still asleep!
[00:48] ---
    How could I neglect my guest
    and go to school?!
[00:51] ---
    Oh, my, so that's
    the tack she's taking today.
[00:53] ---
    It must be rough having so many
    reasons why you cannot go to school.
[00:57] ---
    Why do you insist on trying
    to make me go to school?!
[01:00] ---
    If I head off to school,
[01:02] ---
    I don't get to be with you...
[01:08] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:11] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:15] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:18] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[01:21] ---
    Yes!
[01:22] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[01:27] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:30] ---
    Come to think of it,
[01:31] ---
    we had forgotten for some time
    that Nagi has a crush on Hayate.
[01:35] ---
    This is terrible!
[01:37] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:37] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:44] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:44] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:50] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:50] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:53] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:53] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:58] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:58] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:03] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:03] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:06] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:06] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:11] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:11] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:15] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:15] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:21] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:21] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:28] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:28] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:31] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:31] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:34] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:34] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:40] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:40] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:47] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:47] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:05] ---
    Going to Hell in Cat-Ear Mode
[03:11] ---
    I swear! Why is it that Hayate
    can't just... well...
[03:14] ---
    ...see how a girl feels about wanting
    to be together as much as possible?
[03:18] ---
    I swear, he's so dense!
[03:22] ---
    Cleaning! Cleaning! Oh, what fun!
[03:26] ---
    You must like to clean, Hayate.
[03:28] ---
    What? Oh, yes.
[03:30] ---
    Then, which do you prefer?
    Someone older or someone younger?
[03:33] ---
    Huh?
[03:35] ---
    Um, so, in other words, are you
    referring to my taste in women?
[03:40] ---
    Yes.
[03:41] ---
    Since Nagi and Hayate's relationship
    is based on a misunderstanding,
[03:44] ---
    I should try to get a clear read
    on exactly how Hayate feels.
[03:48] ---
    Could this be...
[03:49] ---
    ...that in terms of the romantic
    plotline of this anime,
[03:51] ---
    the flag has been set for the Maria ending?
[03:54] ---
    I have to say, I like
    older women, hands down!
[03:57] ---
    Younger girls are adorable,
    but they don't interest me romantically!
[04:02] ---
    Oh, is that so?
[04:04] ---
    She seems to be responding
    with some disappointment to that...
[04:07] ---
    What's going on?
[04:08] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[04:10] ---
    Come here for a second!
[04:12] ---
    Certainly! I will be right there!
[04:14] ---
    Please excuse me.
    We can discuss this again later.
SIGN    Attendance Chart
[04:23] ---
    I guess Nagi's absent again today.
[04:26] ---
    That reminds me, that suspicious
    person in black the other day...
[04:29] ---
    I hear he's the Sanzenin
    family's new butler.
[04:32] ---
    I only caught a glimpse of him,
    but he was a young boy, right?
[04:35] ---
    Yup, yup. I thought he looked pretty manly.
[04:39] ---
    Did he?
[04:40] ---
    I feel like that wasn't quite the case...
[04:42] ---
    Then here, let's go get another look at him!
[04:45] ---
    Yes.
[04:46] ---
    Hey, Hayate, would you mind
    trying this outfit on?
[04:50] ---
    Um, I hate to point out the obvious,
    but that's a girl's outfit, right?
[04:53] ---
    Don't worry, it's in your size.
[04:55] ---
    No, that's not what I mean.
    Why do I have to wear a girl's outfit?
[04:59] ---
    Why...? Because...
    I think it'd look good on you.
[05:01] ---
    You're doing this on a whim?!
[05:03] ---
    Well, yes, it's on a whim,
[05:05] ---
    but if I don't come up
    with things for you to do,
[05:06] ---
    we can't spend time together!
[05:08] ---
    Darn it!
[05:09] ---
    Quit complaining and put this on!
[05:12] ---
    Please stop! Nooo!
[05:17] ---
    Honestly!
[05:18] ---
    Making me wear a sailor
    uniform... You're awful!
[05:21] ---
    No, no, it looks very good on you!
[05:24] ---
    That doesn't make me happy at all!
[05:26] ---
    I know! Let me get my camera!
[05:28] ---
    Please don't!
[05:29] ---
    You mustn't take photos of me like this!
[05:32] ---
    Where's the harm in it?
    It's in commemoration.
[05:34] ---
    What's there to commemorate?!
[05:35] ---
    Besides, if the head
    butler sees me like this,
[05:38] ---
    I'll be fired!
[05:39] ---
    Huh? What do you mean?
[05:41] ---
    Allow me to explain!
[05:42] ---
    It was actually only a couple days ago
[05:43] ---
    that Hayate received instruction
    from Klaus, the head butler,
[05:46] ---
    on how a butler was expected to behave.
SIGN    Butlers must be manly!!
[05:49] ---
    Butlers must be manly.
[05:52] ---
    Understood?
[05:53] ---
    As a butler of the Sanzenin family,
[05:55] ---
    you must be a gentleman and behave
    in a manly manner at all times.
[05:59] ---
    This being an era of equality
    between men and women,
[06:01] ---
    manliness is sought after all the more.
[06:03] ---
    If you are incapable of such behavior,
[06:05] ---
    I will expect your immediate resignation!
[06:09] ---
    I see, I had no idea Klaus had said that...
[06:11] ---
    That's why I can't afford
    to be seen like this by Mr. Klaus!
[06:16] ---
    And Mr. Klaus isn't the only one!
[06:18] ---
    Maria, too...
[06:20] ---
    If she saw me like this,
    I'd die of embarrassment.
[06:22] ---
    Oh, my, what are we to do?
[06:24] ---
    It would be a bit problematic
    if you were to die.
[06:26] ---
    M-Maria!
[06:28] ---
    Here I was, wondering
    what you two were up to
[06:30] ---
    and to find you doing this...
[06:31] ---
    Th-This isn't what it looks like!
    The Miss forced me to do this!
[06:33] ---
    Well, Hayate insisted
    that he wanted to try it on, so...
[06:36] ---
    I said no such thing!
[06:38] ---
    You needn't worry.
[06:39] ---
    I don't believe that you have
    a taste for cross dressing.
[06:42] ---
    Thank goodness!
[06:43] ---
    I was so worried
    that you got the wrong idea.
[06:46] ---
    But really, what a child you are!
[06:49] ---
    But I thought it would look good on Hayate.
[06:52] ---
    Even so, a sailor uniform?
[06:54] ---
    That's right! I'm a man!
[06:57] ---
    Huh?
[07:01] ---
    This frilly one is sure
    to look good on Hayate!
[07:05] ---
    Maria!
[07:07] ---
    Hey, Maria, in that case,
    how about this skirt?
[07:10] ---
    What? But won't a pink one be cuter?
[07:13] ---
    No, I'd say red.
[07:15] ---
    Oh, my! This blue one
    is a tempting choice, too!
[07:17] ---
    This is bad! They're both
    totally in high school girl mode!
[07:21] ---
    My purity is in jeopardy!
[07:22] ---
    M-Maria, what do you think of this?!
[07:24] ---
    Carefully...
[07:24] ---
    Oh, my, it's fantastic!
[07:28] ---
    Where are you going?
[07:30] ---
    You can't walk around the residence
    dressed in a sailor uniform.
[07:33] ---
    Well, but you know,
    I need to work and stuff...
[07:36] ---
    Ah, quite commendable.
[07:38] ---
    Uh...
[07:40] ---
    But we'll just call this work, too.
[07:43] ---
    Why don't you try this on, too?
[07:49] ---
    You're terrible... Doing this to me...
[07:51] ---
    Th-This is...
[07:53] ---
    This is not even funny.
[07:56] ---
    If Mr. Klaus sees me,
    I really will end up getting fired!
[08:00] ---
    Oh, don't worry about that.
[08:02] ---
    Or rather, don't look at me like that.
[08:03] ---
    That is right. It is embarrassing.
[08:05] ---
    I'm the one feeling embarrassed here!
[08:08] ---
    But well, you know,
    it really looks good on you!
[08:10] ---
    You think so, too, don't you, Tama?
[08:22] ---
    T-Tama, you can't!
[08:24] ---
    You may be an animal, but that's...
[08:26] ---
    ...not something you can do in an anime!
[08:37] ---
    Come on, let's do it!
    Seriously, let's do it!
[08:39] ---
    Whoa! You stupid idiot!
[08:40] ---
    You weigh over 300 kilos! You'll kill me!
[08:43] ---
    Allow me to explain to you kids
    at home watching this for the first time.
[08:47] ---
    To tell the truth, this tiger called Tama
    is capable of human speech.
SIGN    Can't show you!
[08:51] ---
    Please don't ask me why he can do this!
[08:55] ---
    Tell me, Maria,
[08:56] ---
    is Tama assaulting Hayate because
    he mistook Hayate for a cute female?
[08:59] ---
    Or is he assaulting Hayate
    for being a cute boy? Which is it?
[09:03] ---
    No idea.
[09:04] ---
    Depending on which it is,
[09:05] ---
    I'm thinking of changing the course
    of Tama's future education...
[09:08] ---
    But well, it looks like Hayate may end up
    dying even as you're saying that.
[09:11] ---
    Tama, stop it!
SIGN    Can't show you!
[09:13] ---
    Come on, where's the harm?! Just a little!
[09:16] ---
    Honestly! That's enough already!
[09:26] ---
    You damn stupid tiger!
[09:28] ---
    Ooh! He dropped Tama with one blow!
[09:30] ---
    He may look like a girl, but inside,
    I guess he's still Herculean.
[09:34] ---
    A-At any rate, I need
    to get changed as soon as possible.
[09:37] ---
    If Mr. Klaus sees me like this...
[09:38] ---
    Really, such a beautiful day.
[09:42] ---
    On days like this,
    there is no better pastime
[09:44] ---
    than to go around giving new
    meanings to the garden flowers.
[09:47] ---
    What is that supposed to mean?
[09:48] ---
    Or rather, never mind that! I have to run!
[09:56] ---
    Who might you be?
[09:57] ---
    A degenerate trespassing
    upon the Sanzenin estate...
[10:01] ---
    He could hardly say, "It's Hayate."
[10:03] ---
    When all else fails...!
[10:06] ---
    Fool.
[10:07] ---
    You think you can escape from me
    on the grounds of this estate?!
[10:14] ---
    Ooh! That's Klaus for you!
[10:16] ---
    He is keeping up with Hayate's speed.
[10:18] ---
    Th-This is bad. He's going to
    catch up to me at this rate.
[10:21] ---
    Since it's come to this, I have no choice
[10:22] ---
    but to hide my face with
    the ribbon and intercept him!
[10:25] ---
    Shoot! I can't see anything!
[10:27] ---
    But in a moment of peril,
    a person's latent powers awaken!
[10:31] ---
    Rather than rely on my eyes,
    I have to have faith in my mind's eye!
[10:34] ---
    Klaus Kick!
[10:38] ---
    That just wasn't going to work.
[10:43] ---
    Die, you miscreant.
[10:50] ---
    What?
[10:53] ---
    WHAT?!
[10:55] ---
    Oh, no!
[11:00] ---
    What's an old guy doing
    getting all excited?!
[11:02] ---
    I'm sorry, Mr. Klaus. I'm sorry!
[11:09] ---
    Here, take this chance to change into these.
[11:11] ---
    Thank you very much!
[11:13] ---
    No, I am the one who should apologize
    for getting carried away.
[11:16] ---
    No, no, you are kind, Maria!
[11:19] ---
    I am so grateful to you, Maria!
[11:21] ---
    Thank you very much, Maria!
[11:23] ---
    If you weren't here, Maria...
[11:24] ---
    What's with him?
    Going on and on about Maria...
[11:24] ---
    Oh, how should I thank you, Maria?
[11:26] ---
    Who knows what might have happened?!
[11:26] ---
    Hayate, hurry up and get changed!
[11:28] ---
    Thank you very much!
[11:29] ---
    Or I'll spread the photos I took earlier!
[11:31] ---
    What?! That is too cruel!
[11:33] ---
    I was kidding! Just kidding!
[11:43] ---
    I guess Nagi not only hired a new butler,
[11:46] ---
    but a new maid, too.
[11:48] ---
    That's the Sanzenin family for you.
[11:50] ---
    But she's an awfully cute looking maid.
[11:52] ---
    They seem busy, though, so shall we leave?
[11:55] ---
    Well, lunch break will be over soon anyway.
[11:58] ---
    I don't think we really need
    to attend out afternoon classes.
[12:01] ---
    How the three student council girls...
[12:04] ---
    ...were able to slip through
    the tight security of the Sanzenin estate
[12:06] ---
    and get onto the grounds is a mystery.
[12:13] ---
    But who in the world was that sweet lady?
[12:18] ---
    If I ever see her again, I would like
    to convey my feelings to her.
[12:22] ---
    Hayate's misfortune was far from over.
[12:27] ---
    Chubby perv! (Mucchiri sukebe)
[12:31] ---
    All I did was touch you.
    (Betsuni sawatta dake janai)
[12:34] ---
    Hot, hot, hot...
[12:37] ---
    Come to think of it,
    I wonder what Ayasaki's doing...
[12:42] ---
    Owowow...
[12:43] ---
    Honestly!
[12:45] ---
    First, I got shoved over by Tama.
    Then I got kicked by Mr. Klaus.
[12:49] ---
    I've got injuries everywhere...
[12:51] ---
    My! You seem to have
    suffered quite an ordeal.
[12:53] ---
    What?
[12:55] ---
    Isumi! What in the world are you doing here?
[12:58] ---
    The thing is, when I woke up,
    I found I had become lost...
[13:01] ---
    I see...
[13:02] ---
    And the experience utterly wore me out.
[13:05] ---
    That must have been quite an ordeal.
[13:07] ---
    Honestly! Your horrible sense
    of direction is hardcore.
[13:11] ---
    Do you realize how many times
    you've been over here?
[13:14] ---
    No matter how many times, I get lost.
[13:16] ---
    The Sanzenin estate is a horrific labyrinth.
[13:18] ---
    Don't go making it sound all scary.
[13:20] ---
    Now, now. It's late already.
[13:22] ---
    Why don't you stay the night again?
[13:25] ---
    I will be sure to let your family know.
[13:28] ---
    I am sorry to trouble you.
[13:30] ---
    Then please have a good night.
[13:32] ---
    Good night.
[13:41] ---
    Don't tell me Isumi saw me
    dressed like a girl...
[13:45] ---
    Don't think about it, don't think about it.
[13:47] ---
    Just get to bed and end the day.
[13:57] ---
    You're not going to sleep yet?
[14:00] ---
    No.
[14:01] ---
    Normally, I have to lie next to Nagi
[14:03] ---
    since she's too frightened
    to fall asleep alone,
[14:06] ---
    but with Isumi staying
    the night again today...
[14:08] ---
    So you are relieved of your duty.
[14:11] ---
    Yes.
[14:12] ---
    Um, Maria, I had no idea
    you played billiards.
[14:15] ---
    Yes, well... If you'd like,
    would you care to join me?
[14:19] ---
    And this might be a good time
    to have a quiet talk with him.
[14:23] ---
    Considering this morning's question,
    could this really mean...
[14:26] ---
    ...that the Maria ending has been
    flagged in the romantic storyline?
[14:28] ---
    And the reason why I suffered all
    that horrendous bad luck today
[14:31] ---
    was to lead up to this
    moment of happiness at night?
[14:33] ---
    Hayate was to regret feeling so
    giddy in this way shortly later.
[14:38] ---
    Then shall we begin?
[14:39] ---
    Yes.
[14:40] ---
    But Isumi and the Miss
    certainly are good friends.
[14:44] ---
    Isumi is special to Nagi.
[14:47] ---
    They met 8 years ago at a party.
[14:53] ---
    What the heck are these scribbles?
[14:55] ---
    They're not scribbles!
[14:57] ---
    They're manga that Nagi worked hard to draw!
[15:00] ---
    Manga, ya say?
[15:01] ---
    So, is this Rikishiman-looking
    guy the villain?
[15:04] ---
    That's my mascot character! Hernia!
[15:06] ---
    What the heck's this? Ancient Incan script?
[15:08] ---
    That's the Lethal Old Man Slash!
[15:11] ---
    Well, whatever it is,
    quit drawin' this stupid stuff
[15:13] ---
    and come play with us a little outside.
[15:27] ---
    I'll never draw another manga again!
[15:35] ---
    H-Hey, what are you doing,
    reading that without my permission?!
[15:38] ---
    Give it back! Haven't you gotten
    enough laughs out of it already?!
[15:41] ---
    What happens next?
[15:43] ---
    Huh?
[15:44] ---
    What happens next in that manga?
[15:49] ---
    Because it was really interesting.
[15:54] ---
    That was how they met.
[15:57] ---
    Less than a minute after
    they met, the Miss...
[16:01] ---
    Please marry me!
[16:02] ---
    Pardon?
[16:03] ---
    This is how the two became fast friends.
[16:08] ---
    I see.
[16:09] ---
    But Isumi is amazing. To think
    she could understand that manga...
[16:13] ---
    I know, right?
[16:15] ---
    Right about now, Nagi
    is probably going on and on
[16:17] ---
    about a story that only
    those two can understand.
[16:21] ---
    Right then, the ultimate weapon
    that came out of Ayers Rock,
[16:25] ---
    the Infinite Ant Production
    Device, begins operating!
[16:27] ---
    The infinitely outpouring ants
    gather the world's sugar supply
[16:30] ---
    and takes it to the great defeated
    warrior general underground!
[16:32] ---
    Thus, the heroes engage
    in a three-way battle across the world,
[16:36] ---
    fighting for the sugar!
[16:37] ---
    But well, that is a thought
    that makes me worry for the future...
[16:41] ---
    By the way, Hayate, where did
    you learn to play billiards?
[16:45] ---
    Oh, I used to work part time
    at a billiard bar back in middle school.
[16:48] ---
    Is it all right for a minor
    to work at a billiard bar?
[16:51] ---
    But I will set that question aside...
[16:53] ---
    I know! If you'd like, we could make a bet.
[16:56] ---
    That sounds like a good idea.
[16:57] ---
    What? I meant that as a joke...
[17:00] ---
    Now, don't say that.
[17:02] ---
    All right, then what shall we bet?
[17:04] ---
    For example, how about something like
[17:06] ---
    the loser does one thing,
    whatever the winner wants?
[17:10] ---
    What? A-Are you sure?
[17:12] ---
    This anime still technically
    belongs to a genre
[17:14] ---
    that caters to adolescent boys, you know.
[17:16] ---
    Um, what are you intending
    to make me do, Hayate?
[17:19] ---
    Nothing... really that bad...
[17:22] ---
    Besides, Hayate,
    don't tell me you actually think
[17:24] ---
    that you even have a 0.1
    chance of winning against me?
[17:37] ---
    Then, shall we begin?
[17:40] ---
    I-Incidentally, if I lose,
    what are you going to make me do?
[17:43] ---
    What? Well, let me think...
[17:45] ---
    Um...
[17:46] ---
    Don't you think that your 155,823,975
    yen debt is an awkward amount?
[17:53] ---
    Huh?
[17:54] ---
    It gets kind of long to say,
    "155,823,975 yen."
[18:00] ---
    Don't you think 200 million yen
    is a lot easier to say?
[18:04] ---
    Today was a terrible day,
[18:06] ---
    but considering this turn of events,
[18:08] ---
    is Maria the last boss?
[18:10] ---
    This is bad! I can't lose this fight!
[18:13] ---
    However, faced with
    an overwhelming difference in skill,
[18:16] ---
    Hayate is helpless!
[18:19] ---
    Uh, um, this is a stupid question,
[18:21] ---
    but if I should end up losing here,
[18:24] ---
    how am I to repay my debt
    after it becomes 200 million?
[18:28] ---
    You have a point.
[18:29] ---
    It would be impossible,
    no matter how you look at it.
[18:31] ---
    Right?
[18:32] ---
    You're just joking about making my
    debt 200 million yen if I lose, right?
[18:35] ---
    Do I look like someone who cracks jokes?
[18:37] ---
    No, you don't.
[18:39] ---
    But there is a possible way
    for you to repay it.
[18:41] ---
    What?
[18:42] ---
    No, nothing.
    Please, go ahead. It's your turn.
[18:45] ---
    Oh, r-right.
[18:48] ---
    This is bad! I have to
    turn the tables somehow!
[18:52] ---
    Incidentally, with regards to the
    quick fix way to repay your debt...
[18:55] ---
    How about a bold move,
    like you marrying Nagi?
[18:59] ---
    What?!
[19:00] ---
    M-Me?! Marry the Miss?!
[19:07] ---
    Oh, you missed.
[19:08] ---
    N-No way, that shouldn't count...
[19:11] ---
    There are no take-backs in a serious match.
[19:16] ---
    Now, if I make this shot,
[19:18] ---
    your debt will become 200 million yen
[19:20] ---
    and you will have to seduce Nagi in earnest.
[19:24] ---
    Um, I could never marry the Miss.
[19:29] ---
    Are you saying you don't like her?
[19:31] ---
    No, that is not it.
[19:33] ---
    If I were to marry the Miss and my debt
    were forgiven because of that,
[19:37] ---
    it would be as if I married
    the Miss for her money.
[19:43] ---
    I mean, this is hypothetically
    speaking! Purely hypothetical!
[19:46] ---
    There is no way the Miss would
    ever fall for someone like me
[19:49] ---
    and even if such an unlikely
    thing should happen,
[19:51] ---
    as a human being, I would
    never lay a hand on a child!
[19:54] ---
    I mean it!
[19:57] ---
    To me, the Miss is
    the person who saved my life
[19:59] ---
    and she is very dear to me,
[20:01] ---
    so I could never do
    something like that to her.
[20:04] ---
    Hayate is a truly good kid.
[20:07] ---
    And yet, here I've been trying
    to pry into his feelings.
[20:11] ---
    Perhaps this is a matter that should
    just be left to the two of them.
[20:16] ---
    Um, is something the matter?
[20:18] ---
    Oh, no, I'm sorry.
[20:22] ---
    Then, here I go.
[20:30] ---
    Oh, dear...
[20:32] ---
    All right! I still have a chance to win!
[20:42] ---
    I-I did it!
[20:44] ---
    Congratulations! You win, Hayate!
[20:47] ---
    Th-Then, I can really ask you
    to do anything?!
[20:50] ---
    Yes, of course...
[20:51] ---
    All right! Something borderline
    to cater to the adolescent boys!
[20:55] ---
    However...
[20:57] ---
    I think you should do something
    about the demon at your back first.
[21:02] ---
    Miss...
[21:04] ---
    What's with the perverted
    look on your face?!
[21:06] ---
    N-No, this was nothing really...
[21:09] ---
    You listen to me, Hayate!
[21:11] ---
    If you ever lay a hand on Maria,
    I'll never forgive you!
[21:16] ---
    Honestly! He's got me!
[21:20] ---
    We're going, Isumi!
[21:24] ---
    Good night.
[21:27] ---
    The last boss that capped
    off the unfortunate day...
[21:28] ---
    ...turned out to be the Miss.
[21:31] ---
    So, Hayate, what was it
    that you actually wanted me to do?
[21:35] ---
    I-I was hoping to be forgiven
    for the expensive coat that I ruined.
[21:40] ---
    My! Is that all?
[21:43] ---
    Yes...
[21:45] ---
    As we all know,
    the butler-in-debt is a coward.
[21:47] ---
    Next time, he will fight you-know-who
    from the science room!
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:02] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:02] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:12] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:12] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:18] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:18] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:23] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:23] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:28] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:28] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:33] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:33] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:39] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:39] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:44] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:44] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:49] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:49] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[22:59] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[22:59] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:05] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:05] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:14] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:14] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:25] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:26] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    This episode of "Hayate the Combat Butler"
    was yet another masterpiece.
[23:31] ---
    Hm, you think so?
[23:32] ---
    In recording, it wasn't colored
    yet, so it's hard to say.
[23:35] ---
    It'll be fine! By the time it's
    actually broadcast, it will be!
[23:38] ---
    I hope so.
[23:39] ---
    More importantly, this is
    a great song, don't you think?
[23:41] ---
    It conveys my desire to...
[23:42] ---
    You mentioned that in a previous episode.
[23:43] ---
    We got it already, so well,
    try this on or something.
[23:45] ---
    What?! What is with this outfit?!
[23:47] ---
    I like you as your manly self,
    but I find this hard to give up, too!
[23:50] ---
    I can never be a bridegroom now...
[23:52] ---
    I'll have you, so don't you worry!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    Oh? That's strange...
[23:58] ---
    What is the matter, Miss?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    It seems I forgot my notebook at school.
[24:02] ---
    Wh-What?!
[24:04] ---
    I will go get it for you right away!
[24:05] ---
    Well, it's not that important...
[24:07] ---
    All right, I'm off!
[24:09] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:11] ---
    "Elohim, Essaim.
    Mr. Cow, Mr. Cow! What is it, Mr. Frog?"
[24:14] ---
    What? Hayate from the Sanzenins is
    at that old school building?
[24:18] ---
    At the hour of three-eyes,
[24:18] ---
    Elohim Essaim.
    Mr. Cow, Mr. Cow! What is it, Mr. Frog?
[24:19] ---
    let's meet again in the world of three-eyes!

9 - Elohim. Essaim. Mr. Cow. Mr. Cow! What is it, Mr. Frog?

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:14] ---
    Thank you for having me.
[00:16] ---
    You are welcome.
[00:18] ---
    Please come visit again.
[00:20] ---
    Say, Isumi, what do you say
    to being lost for one more night?
[00:24] ---
    What? But...
[00:25] ---
    I need you!
[00:28] ---
    If we become separated now,
[00:29] ---
    there's a chance we may never
    meet again in this lifetime!
[00:35] ---
    If you only came to school,
    we could see each other.
[00:46] ---
    She has friends to invite her
    to school like that, and yet...
[00:52] ---
    I have to do something so that
    the Miss can enjoy going to school!
[00:56] ---
    Hayate!
[00:57] ---
    Yes?
[00:58] ---
    What do you suppose is the meaning of life?
[01:01] ---
    What? Um...
[01:03] ---
    D-Do I need to answer that immediately?
[01:06] ---
    No, but I think the testament of your life
[01:09] ---
    is not something
    that is given to you by others.
[01:12] ---
    Having been born a human being,
[01:14] ---
    I think there must be a way
    of life that's more true to myself.
[01:15] ---
    Um, is this going to take long?
[01:18] ---
    Well, there you have it.
[01:23] ---
    While she's coming up
    with excuses like that, it'll be tough...
[01:29] ---
    Even when urgently needing
    to go to the bathroom,
[01:31] ---
    you listen to what the Miss has to say.
[01:34] ---
    That is yet another part of a butler's duties!
[01:38] ---
    Hey, no filming allowed within the residence!
[01:41] ---
    Ow!
[01:43] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:46] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:49] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:52] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[01:56] ---
    Yes!
[01:57] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[02:01] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[02:06] ---
    Please do not, by any means,
    watch this alone.
[02:12] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[02:12] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:18] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:18] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:25] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:25] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:28] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:28] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:33] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:33] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:38] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:38] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:41] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:41] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:46] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:46] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:50] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:50] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:56] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:56] ---
    Just let it take you
[03:03] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[03:03] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[03:06] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[03:06] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[03:09] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[03:09] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:15] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:15] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:22] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:22] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:41] ---
    Elohim Essaim.
    Mr. Cow, Mr. Cow! What is it, Mr. Frog?
[03:47] ---
    Good morning, Miss! It's Hayate!
[03:51] ---
    What is it? It's so early...
[04:00] ---
    Miss!
[04:02] ---
    Hey, you dummy! What
    are you doing all of a sudden?!
[04:05] ---
    I will help you change!
[04:07] ---
    Since it would be a shame
    to only accompany you to school!
[04:11] ---
    Don't be ridiculous!
[04:12] ---
    How could I do something embarrassing
    like change in front of you?!
[04:16] ---
    Accompany me to school?
[04:18] ---
    Yes!
[04:19] ---
    Starting today, I shall be
    escorting you to and from school!
[04:23] ---
    You think a trick like that
    will make me go to school?!
SIGN    °This is within the grounds of the Sanzenin estate.
[04:34] ---
    W-Well, no need to go to school.
[04:37] ---
    It would be fine to just go
    somewhere to have fun like this.
[04:40] ---
    What are you saying?
    A student's duty is to study.
[04:43] ---
    Please attend every day and study hard.
SIGN    °This is within the grounds of Hakuou Academy.
[04:54] ---
    I will see you later, Miss.
[04:57] ---
    Why?!
[04:58] ---
    If I go to school, we become
    separated for the duration,
[05:02] ---
    so why do you want me
    to go to school so much?!
[05:05] ---
    There are some who can't go to school
    anymore, even if they want to, so...
[05:11] ---
    S-Sorry...
[05:12] ---
    Then I shall come
    for you again after school.
[05:24] ---
    With the Miss away at school,
[05:26] ---
    we really get some peace
    and quiet here at the estate.
[05:28] ---
    If the tiger would refrain from talking,
[05:30] ---
    I think we'd have even more peace and quiet.
[05:34] ---
    The butler-in-debt sure is coldhearted.
[05:36] ---
    Or rather, don't you need to be in school?
[05:39] ---
    You were technically in high school
    before you came here, right?
[05:42] ---
    Well, yes, but...
[05:44] ---
    I must be the Miss's butler here
    for another 40 years to repay my debt,
[05:50] ---
    so given that, going to school just seems...
[05:57] ---
    So I've got another eternity of lectures
    that remind me of crappy games.
[06:01] ---
    Nagi, wait.
[06:03] ---
    Why doesn't the blackboard have
    the ability to skip forward?
[06:06] ---
    It's because they continue to adhere
    to such old-fashioned systems
[06:09] ---
    that education in Japan is never going to...
[06:12] ---
    Wh-What are you...?!
[06:14] ---
    You must not go that way.
[06:15] ---
    What?
[06:16] ---
    That is not the school building.
[06:20] ---
    R-Right.
[06:22] ---
    It's so rare for you to know
    when we're going in the wrong direction.
[06:25] ---
    I guess you don't attend
    school every day for nothing.
[06:28] ---
    That is not the reason, but I can tell...
[06:42] ---
    Winner!
SIGN    Sinner
[06:47] ---
    I-It was one letter off...
[06:52] ---
    Hey, I'm home!
[06:55] ---
    Oh? That's strange...
[06:57] ---
    What is the matter?
[06:59] ---
    It seems she forgot a notebook at school.
[07:02] ---
    What?!
[07:03] ---
    See that?!
[07:04] ---
    This is what happens when
    I make a rare excursion to school!
[07:07] ---
    It is because you go to school
    so infrequently that this happens.
[07:11] ---
    I will go get it!
[07:14] ---
    You have dedicated yourself
    to studying all day today!
[07:18] ---
    We cannot allow the fruit of that labor
    to languish in a deserted classroom!
[07:21] ---
    Well, it's not that important...
[07:24] ---
    And it's quite late already...
[07:26] ---
    All right, I'm off!
[07:37] ---
    How do I get into school at night?
[07:40] ---
    Suspicious individual sighted!
[07:44] ---
    Wait. Oh?
[07:45] ---
    You're that suspicious individual
    from some time ago,
[07:48] ---
    who's also a Sanzenin family butler,
    who also saved my life...
[07:51] ---
    Um...
[07:52] ---
    I'm Hayate Ayasaki.
[07:54] ---
    As I recall, you are a teacher here...
[07:57] ---
    Yukiji Katsura.
[07:58] ---
    Or rather, what're you doing here?
[07:59] ---
    I was dodging your blow from behind.
[08:02] ---
    Oh.
[08:03] ---
    What are you doing out in the street?
[08:05] ---
    Oh, me?
[08:06] ---
    I'm on so-called night duty.
    You know, night duty.
[08:09] ---
    Your hard work is much appreciated!
[08:11] ---
    This is perfect. Miss Nagi apparently
    forgot something here and...
[08:15] ---
    What?
[08:15] ---
    I'm sorry to ask this, but might
    I borrow the key to the classroom?
[08:18] ---
    What?!
[08:19] ---
    Th-The key to the classroom?!
[08:21] ---
    You mean, you're coming
    to the night duty room?!
[08:23] ---
    Yes! I don't want you
    to trouble yourself, after all.
[08:28] ---
    Uh, wait, I'll go get it for you.
SIGN    Night Duty Room
[08:31] ---
    No, I will go myself.
[08:33] ---
    If you just open the door...!
[08:39] ---
    This night duty room is rather bursting
[08:41] ---
    with the lifestyle sensibilities
    of a woman in her mid-20s, isn't it?
[08:44] ---
    I-It's not that bad!
[08:46] ---
    I already culled a lot of my
    personal belongings, you know.
[08:49] ---
    Could it be that you live here?
[08:51] ---
    I-I-It can't be helped, right?!
[08:53] ---
    I can't afford rent
[08:54] ---
    and the bath in the night duty room
    is cleaner and bigger!
[08:57] ---
    Oh wait, you're an outsider!
    I don't have to take this from you!
[09:00] ---
    Oh? What do we have here?
[09:01] ---
    Oh.
[09:02] ---
    Katsy's bringing a man back
    with her to the night duty room!
[09:06] ---
    And it's a younger guy to boot!
[09:08] ---
    Scandal exposed! You'll be fired for sure!
[09:11] ---
    Anything but that! My salary!
[09:14] ---
    You've got the wrong idea!
[09:15] ---
    Wait, that look of poverty...
    I feel like I've seen it before...
[09:19] ---
    I-I'm a butler of the Sanzenin family.
    My name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[09:23] ---
    Oh!
[09:25] ---
    You trespassed on school grounds!
[09:26] ---
    And after making a pass
    at the student body president,
[09:28] ---
    you took a kick to the face
    and got rejected!
[09:30] ---
    And as revenge,
[09:31] ---
    you tried to kidnap and confine her
    to the student council office,
[09:34] ---
    but your plot was foiled by Yukiji!
[09:37] ---
    That butler of the Sanzenin family!
[09:39] ---
    I feel like some rather erroneous
    embellishments have been added to the story...
[09:43] ---
    You're just imagining things.
[09:46] ---
    So anyway, I'm the student council committee chairman, Izumi Segawa.
[09:50] ---
    Nice to meet you!
[09:51] ---
    Likewise, vice chairman, Miki Hanabishi.
[09:53] ---
    Disciplinary committee member, Risa Asakaze.
[09:56] ---
    Student council?
[09:58] ---
    Then, these people
    are Miss Katsura's friends?
[10:03] ---
    What are you doing here?
[10:05] ---
    Um, um... Hayata?
[10:07] ---
    I'm "Hayate".
[10:09] ---
    I came to pick up something Miss Nagi forgot.
[10:11] ---
    I see. Incidentally, we are here to study
    for our midterms, Hayata.
[10:16] ---
    Indeed we are, Hayata.
[10:18] ---
    Fine, just call me "Hayata".
[10:20] ---
    But meeting for a study group
    so late at night at school...
[10:23] ---
    You really are studious.
[10:24] ---
    If we truly were studious,
[10:26] ---
    we wouldn't be meeting
    for a study group, Hayata.
[10:29] ---
    But I thought Hakuou
    is a prestigious school...
[10:31] ---
    It's just that a portion
    of our students are super smart.
[10:34] ---
    They're the ones who transfer
    and skip grades, after all.
[10:37] ---
    But fundamentally, except
    under extreme circumstances,
[10:39] ---
    our system of automatic
    advancement won't flunk you.
[10:41] ---
    The school covers grades 1-12!
[10:43] ---
    Students like us, who've
    been here since grade school,
[10:48] ---
    are stupid, as it should be!
[10:49] ---
    So that we're on the verge of flunking
    due to extreme circumstances!
[10:52] ---
    Beat that!
[10:54] ---
    So that's why I'm tutoring them.
[10:57] ---
    The way Katsy teaches makes
    things so easy to understand!
[10:59] ---
    Oh, please!
[11:02] ---
    It's a good example of how good athletes
    don't always make good coaches.
[11:06] ---
    Right, right.
[11:07] ---
    Wait, was that a compliment?
[11:08] ---
    Relax. I was mocking you.
[11:10] ---
    Don't you mock your teacher!
[11:12] ---
    Looks like a lot of fun.
[11:14] ---
    Here.
[11:16] ---
    The classroom key.
[11:17] ---
    Return it when you're done, okay, Hayata?
[11:19] ---
    Miss Katsura, you know what
    my real name is, don't you?
[11:22] ---
    But you know, you sure
    aren't a boy for nothing!
[11:25] ---
    Going to the classroom
    in the West Building so late at night!
[11:28] ---
    What?
[11:28] ---
    I know!
[11:29] ---
    Yeah, yeah.
[11:31] ---
    Um, surely, you don't mean...
[11:33] ---
    Well, it is an old school.
[11:35] ---
    There are apparently a lot of appearances.
[11:37] ---
    What?!
[11:41] ---
    Don't bring back any curses
    or anything with you!
[11:43] ---
    Even if Sadako or Kayako
    or Jason or Freddy show up,
[11:47] ---
    beat them up, okay?
[11:49] ---
    Right...
[11:54] ---
    Just because they don't have to go...
[11:56] ---
    Besides, it's the school building
    they attend on a daily basis.
[12:00] ---
    There's no way any such things will appear...
[12:05] ---
    Come on! Isn't this way different than
    when I was here last?!
[12:09] ---
    W-Well, since I'm here anyway, I guess I'll go in...
[12:12] ---
    From this red door...
SIGN    Old School Building Do Not Enter
[12:25] ---
    How would you like some squid? (Ika wa ikaga)
[12:29] ---
    I'll have lots, thanks.
    (Gattsuri itadaki-masu)
[12:39] ---
    Whoa...
[12:44] ---
    My cell?!
[12:46] ---
    Oh, right, I got one from Maria.
[12:49] ---
    Yes, hello?
[12:52] ---
    Hey, Hayate, how are you doing?
[12:54] ---
    I'm in the school building right now.
[12:56] ---
    To what do I owe this sudden phone call?
[12:58] ---
    Oh, no, sorry!
[13:00] ---
    But you know, school at night can be dangerous in various ways, so well...
[13:05] ---
    I got worried.
[13:10] ---
    Thank you very much.
[13:12] ---
    R-Right. I'm relieved, though.
[13:14] ---
    I thought you were alone,
    but I hear lots of other people around you,
[13:18] ---
    so I guess you're there
    with a bunch of people.
[13:20] ---
    What?
[13:21] ---
    You hear people?
[13:23] ---
    Yes, I hear a lot of chatter
    in the background.
[13:26] ---
    But it's not like this is a test of courage.
[13:28] ---
    I don't think it's necessary for them
    to be screaming like that.
[13:34] ---
    Well, good luck.
[13:36] ---
    Miss?! Miss?!
SIGN    No Signal
SIGN    Do it over from somewhere
     with a good signal.
    In fact, do over your whole life.
[13:44] ---
    I-I better hurry to the classroom.
[13:54] ---
    It's taking him a while to come back...
[13:56] ---
    Well, at night, classrooms hold
    alluring recorders and P.E. clothes
[14:00] ---
    that are distracting for adolescent boys.
[14:04] ---
    He may be a butler, but he's still a boy.
[14:06] ---
    He's probably ransacking Hina's desk right
    about now and has her recorder...
[14:10] ---
    You seem to be having an awful lot of fun.
[14:12] ---
    What in the world might you be talking about?
[14:14] ---
    Whoa, Miss Student Body President...
[14:16] ---
    Hina, when did you get here?
[14:18] ---
    I made a special effort to bring you snacks,
[14:20] ---
    but are you working seriously?
[14:21] ---
    Not to worry.
[14:22] ---
    We are seriously discussing
    the perverted actions of adolescent boys.
[14:26] ---
    Huh?
[14:27] ---
    In conclusion, your recorder must be
    in Hayata's possession right about now.
[14:31] ---
    That's right!
[14:32] ---
    Get serious and study! Study!
[14:34] ---
    Hey, maybe Hayata's mistakenly
    wandered into the old school building.
[14:39] ---
    The old school building?
[14:40] ---
    Oh, that's a distinct possibility!
[14:42] ---
    This is terrible. That place is...
[14:44] ---
    Wh-What?
[14:45] ---
    What?! Hakuou Academy
    is haunted by evil spirits?!
[14:49] ---
    Yes, I hear they appear
    in the old school building.
[14:52] ---
    Well, knowing that school, I'm sure
    they'll hire a ghost sweeper or something.
[14:55] ---
    What are we going to do?!
    If Hayate mistakenly goes in there...
[15:00] ---
    Hayate, respond! Hayate!
SIGN    No Signal
SIGN    You have no signal.
[15:02] ---
    What?
[15:03] ---
    Hayate of the Sanzenin family
    went to that old school building?!
[15:06] ---
    No, we're just saying it's possible.
[15:09] ---
    We don't know that he's
    actually wandered in there...
[15:11] ---
    I'll go look for him.
[15:12] ---
    It's dangerous, Hina!
[15:14] ---
    An outsider may be in danger
    on school grounds!
[15:18] ---
    I can't just ignore that.
[15:19] ---
    There may be ghosts and stuff.
[15:21] ---
    Don't worry. Ghosts and stuff
    don't bother me at all.
[15:26] ---
    That's Hina for you.
[15:27] ---
    I know she's my little sister,
[15:29] ---
    but it's too bad that she's a girl,
    considering how tough she is.
[15:31] ---
    Yup, yup.
[15:35] ---
    I know what I said, but...
[15:38] ---
    A-Anyway, I better hurry up and find Hayate.
[15:42] ---
    Come to think of it,
    why's it so bright in here...?
[15:53] ---
    That scream just now...
[15:57] ---
    My cell...
[16:01] ---
    I thought ghosts and stuff
    do not bother you.
[16:03] ---
    Like there's a girl who wouldn't
    be bothered by those things!
[16:06] ---
    They say will-o'-the-wisps
    are a scientific phenomenon called plasma.
[16:11] ---
    There's nothing logical
    about what scares you!
[16:13] ---
    Then here is the final question.
[16:16] ---
    Who is it that has been
    asking you these questions?
[16:27] ---
    S-Someone...
[16:29] ---
    Someone!
[16:39] ---
    Are you all right?!
[16:40] ---
    Oh? You're Miss Katsura,
    the student body president.
[16:46] ---
    M-Miss Katsura?!
[16:48] ---
    Thank you for saving me, but...
[16:51] ---
    Don't go wandering
    into scary places like this!
[16:58] ---
    I see, so this is the old school building.
[17:01] ---
    No wonder things didn't seem quite right...
[17:03] ---
    What happened earlier is to be kept
    strictly secret, all right, Hayate?
[17:06] ---
    Pardon?
[17:08] ---
    If you tell anyone that I was scared
    like that, I'll hit you for real!
[17:12] ---
    I feel like you already hit me
    for real earlier...
[17:15] ---
    Never mind that. Let us hurry up
    and get out of here.
[17:18] ---
    What are you saying, Hayate?
[17:20] ---
    Huh?
[17:21] ---
    You think I'd ever go home after being beaten?!
[17:25] ---
    No, but I need to get the Miss's notebook...
[17:28] ---
    Overruled!
[17:30] ---
    I'm going to identify who that
    bastard was, no matter what!
[17:35] ---
    Oh, wait... Miss Katsura!
[17:36] ---
    Call me Hinagiku!
[17:38] ---
    Please wait, Miss Katsura!
[17:42] ---
    It will not do to leave things as they are.
[17:50] ---
    Miss Katsura really
    is the same as Miss Nagi.
[17:53] ---
    She absolutely hates to lose.
[17:57] ---
    It's getting kind of hot in here.
[18:06] ---
    Wow, are you self-conscious
[18:08] ---
    that you're alone with
    a girl at school at night?
[18:11] ---
    I-I'm not self-conscious
    about someone like you.
[18:15] ---
    Someone like me?
[18:17] ---
    You're too unguarded to begin with!
[18:19] ---
    You should learn to be
    a bit more modest around boys!
[18:22] ---
    Being easygoing like that, who knows
    what someone might do to you...
[18:26] ---
    I'm fine with that.
[18:27] ---
    Huh?
[18:30] ---
    If it's you, Hayate,
    you can do anything to me.
[18:33] ---
    What?! M-Miss Katsura?!
[18:39] ---
    If I played a joke like that,
[18:41] ---
    would boys think I was being serious?
[18:45] ---
    Thank you for the warning.
[18:46] ---
    I'll be careful in the future...
[18:48] ---
    ...around boys like you.
[18:50] ---
    I thought she hated to lose
    about as much as the Miss,
[18:53] ---
    but I was wrong.
[18:55] ---
    She hates to lose even more than the Miss!
[18:58] ---
    That's the doll that I defeated earlier!
[19:00] ---
    What?! No way!
[19:02] ---
    Ta-da!
[19:04] ---
    L-Leave, you humans!
[19:06] ---
    Leave, or I-I will eat you guys!
[19:11] ---
    Don't underestimate Hinagiku Katsura,
[19:13] ---
    the student body president of Hakuou Academy!
[19:15] ---
    I-It is unfair to execute a sneak attack!
[19:18] ---
    A-At any rate, my dear Hayate...
[19:20] ---
    Huh?
[19:21] ---
    Please hurry up and leave this...
[19:23] ---
    I mean. L-Leave!
[19:26] ---
    The humiliation you made me suffer earlier...
[19:28] ---
    I'll return the favor a hundred times over!
[19:31] ---
    Why you!
[19:32] ---
    I-I will curse you!
[19:34] ---
    "My dear Hayate"...?
[19:44] ---
    I don't understand the situation at all,
[19:46] ---
    but could this really be a simple
    scare tactic to get us out of here?
[19:50] ---
    Miss Katsura, let's forget about
    that terrifying monster and leave!
[19:54] ---
    Call me Hinagiku!
[19:55] ---
    At any rate, I'm defeating this bastard!
[19:58] ---
    Please!
[19:59] ---
    "We can't go until you've magnificently
    defeated that terrifying doll?!"
[20:04] ---
    Don't say such a thing! Let us leave!
[20:06] ---
    It'll be fine, Hayate.
[20:08] ---
    If I fight him without fear,
    he's not that tough...
[20:14] ---
    I-I am tough!
[20:16] ---
    I am real strong,
    so I will defeat you humans!
[20:20] ---
    You may have changed your appearance,
    but you're no match for me...
[20:24] ---
    You got me!
[20:30] ---
    But I haven't done anything yet...
[20:32] ---
    Uh-oh.
[20:33] ---
    W-Well, that was incredible, Miss Katsura!
[20:36] ---
    You defeated the ghost
    with just your fighting spirit!
[20:38] ---
    Huh? Huh?!
[20:39] ---
    That must be what they call "chi"! "Chi"!
[20:42] ---
    It's what the masters use!
[20:43] ---
    You must have used it without realizing it!
[20:45] ---
    Man, you're incredible, Miss Katsura!
[20:48] ---
    I'm not sure I'm convinced...
[20:50] ---
    Come now. The evil spirit has been
    defeated, so let us hurry and...
[20:55] ---
    Huh?
[20:56] ---
    You're going to get Nagi's notebook, right?
[20:58] ---
    What?
[20:59] ---
    Let's hurry.
[21:00] ---
    Y-Yes, Miss Katsura.
[21:03] ---
    Call me Hinagiku.
[21:05] ---
    Yes, Hinagiku.
[21:10] ---
    It seems they have finally left.
[21:12] ---
    Yes.
[21:14] ---
    Now, let us defeat the real evil spirit.
[21:17] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[21:18] ---
    Hayate!
[21:19] ---
    I was so worried! You didn't get
    possessed by evil spirits, did you?!
[21:23] ---
    I am fine.
[21:29] ---
    School really is a nice thing to have.
[21:32] ---
    School life is a distant thing for him now.
[21:34] ---
    What is the butler-in-debt thinking?
[21:36] ---
    And this is where in the next episode,
[21:38] ---
    a terrible incident happens
    that no one could ever have anticipated!
[21:41] ---
    We all will fight against a state of emergency!
[21:43] ---
    Or rather, we have no choice but to fight it!
[21:49] ---
    Study!
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:03] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:03] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:13] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:13] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:19] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:19] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:23] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:23] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:29] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:29] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:34] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:34] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:40] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:40] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:45] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:45] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:50] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:50] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:00] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:00] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:06] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:06] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:15] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:15] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    I'm counting on you, courage.
    I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:32] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:33] ---
    Today, we've brought Maria
    on for a guest appearance.
[23:36] ---
    Hello, I'm Maria.
[23:38] ---
    Man, this song is so soothing.
    That's Maria for you!
[23:41] ---
    Thank you very much, Hayate.
[23:43] ---
    What's this, Hayate?! Getting all spoony!
[23:45] ---
    Oh, my.
[23:46] ---
    All right, I think I'll train hard
    to become a soothing ladylike girl, too!
[23:50] ---
    No, you are best as you are now, Miss!
[23:52] ---
    Really? If you say so...
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Say, Maria, I recall seeing this
    scene several times before...
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    The next episode takes place
    during the same time as Episode 8.
[24:03] ---
    Which means we get to see
    cat-ear Hayate from another angle!
[24:06] ---
    That is not all.
[24:08] ---
    It seems it is a completely
    original story made just for anime.
[24:10] ---
    Ooh! That makes me feel
    both worry and anticipation.
[24:13] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    "The Strangest Hyperdeflation Ever.
[24:16] ---
    "Play Your Games
    and Don't Build Up a Backlog".
[24:17] ---
    Mr. Hero, please get fished up already!
[24:19] ---
    The Strangest Hyperdeflation Ever.
    Play Your Games and Don't Build Up a Backlog
[24:20] ---
    Rawr! I'm currently intensely fired up!

10 - The Strangest High-Deflation Ever. Play Your Games and Don't Build Up a Backlog

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:16] ---
    Let us stop the chitchat now
[00:20] ---
    Come, let us quietly see this through
[00:24] ---
    If it's romance, look, it's already begun
SIGN    Maria All the Way
[00:52] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:55] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:58] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:01] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[01:05] ---
    Yes!
[01:06] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[01:10] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:14] ---
    Today, we have an original
    episode drafted by Mr. Hata.
[01:17] ---
    Isn't that right?
[01:18] ---
    That's what I hear.
[01:21] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:21] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:28] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:28] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:34] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:34] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:37] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:37] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:42] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:42] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:47] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:47] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:50] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:50] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:55] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:55] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:59] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:59] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:05] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:05] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:12] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:12] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:15] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:15] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:18] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:18] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:24] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:24] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:31] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:31] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:50] ---
    The Strangest High-Deflation Ever.
    Play Your Games and Don't Build Up a Backlog
[02:54] ---
    Damn it! Damn it!
[02:56] ---
    What is this game?!
[02:58] ---
    This game's got awfully crappy graphics.
[03:01] ---
    This is a PS3 game?
[03:03] ---
    No.
[03:04] ---
    But I'm tired of high-deflation games,
[03:06] ---
    so I felt like giving an older game a try.
[03:09] ---
    Huh. So you're sayin'
    modern games're lukewarm?
[03:12] ---
    Then wouldn't it be better
    to play outside or somethin'?
[03:13] ---
    That would be tiring.
[03:14] ---
    Well, yeah, but...
[03:16] ---
    Rather than do something so tiring,
[03:17] ---
    I want to play games from the good old days
[03:19] ---
    and get a renewed perspective
    on our current era of high-deflation.
SIGN     New Heroic Dragon Tale
[03:22] ---
    I obtained an old, rare game in
    an attempt to cleanse my tainted soul
[03:26] ---
    with the purity of
    something old school, but...
[03:28] ---
    It's more you-know-what than rare, though.
[03:31] ---
    Well, to put it simply,
    that's what it comes down to.
[03:33] ---
    I mean, I'd heard that it was you-know-what,
[03:36] ---
    but this game is even worse
    than I'd been led to expect.
[03:38] ---
    But isn't that the appeal of retro games?
SIGN     A Black-Hearted Santa
     has appeared!
SIGN     Hayate LV Small Fry
[03:40] ---
    Command
    Run
    Tools
     Attack
    Defend
    Kowtow
[03:42] ---
    I mean, yeah, the audio's fair at best,
    the movement's choppy,
SIGN    Hayate throws a punch!
SIGN    The Black-Hearted
     Santa swiftly dodges!
[03:44] ---
    and the screen's so cluttered,
    you can barely tell where you're at...
SIGN    The Black-Hearted
     Santa
    attacks!
SIGN    He delivers
     a marvelous blow!
    Hayate takes
    69372 damage!
SIGN    Hayate has died.
[03:48] ---
    Shuddup, you Kansai person.
SIGN    Shuddup,
    you Kansai person.
SIGN    Go have some
     octopus balls
[03:50] ---
    Go have some octopus balls
    as your side dish with white rice.
SIGN    as your side dish
    with white rice.
[03:53] ---
    The hell was that?!
    You makin' fun of Kansai people?!
[03:56] ---
    H-Hey, Sakuya, you don't have to
    get so pissed at a silly game.
[04:00] ---
    And you, your game play sucks,
    so don't blame it on the game
SIGN    And you,
    your game play sucks,
SIGN    so don't blame it
    on the game,
[04:02] ---
    you little squirt!
SIGN    YOU LITTLE SQUIRT!
[04:04] ---
    What did you say?!
[04:05] ---
    Why you! You're nothing but a crappy game!
[04:09] ---
    I'm never enterin' more than
    "AAAA" for a character name!
SIGN    Grab a hold of freedom
[04:15] ---
    Um, dinner is ready.
    What are you two both doing?
[04:20] ---
    Nothing! We were just consigning
    a societal evil to oblivion!
SIGN    Melf me all da way
SIGN    One hour of
    gaming a day
[04:24] ---
    Pardon?
[04:25] ---
    Never mind that. What's for dinner?
[04:27] ---
    Green peppers stuffed with meat,
    among other things.
[04:28] ---
    What? But I hate green peppers.
[04:31] ---
    It's 'cause yer so picky
    that you're not growin' any taller.
[04:34] ---
    Nah, it's not just yer height...
[04:36] ---
    Wh-What are you trying
    to get at?! Don't stare at me!
[04:39] ---
    I didn't say anythin' yet.
[04:41] ---
    What d'you think I was referrin' to?
[04:49] ---
    The next morning!
SIGN    Butlers must be manly!!
[04:53] ---
    Why does the sun...
[04:58] ---
    ...rise every morning?
[05:02] ---
    What are you doing griping about
    nature in your first waking moment?
[05:06] ---
    The sun just doesn't get it!
[05:09] ---
    It's only when you miss deadlines
    and take breaks once in while
[05:12] ---
    that people will appreciate it
    when you actually have a chapter in print.
[05:15] ---
    A-Airing such an appalling statement
    on TV is a bit questionable...
[05:19] ---
    Anyway, please change quickly
    and prepare for school.
[05:23] ---
    Sakuya and the others
    are waiting, after all.
[05:26] ---
    Makita! Kunieda!
[05:28] ---
    All righty, I'm off to school!
[05:32] ---
    Hmph! School, school! What an annoying girl!
[05:34] ---
    Hmph! School, school! What an annoying...
[05:38] ---
    Tell me, Maria, is this déjà vu?
SIGN    When watching Hayate the Combat Butler,
    please keep the room bright
    and sit away from the TV
[05:40] ---
    I feel like I've seen this scene before.
[05:43] ---
    The thing is, it seems
    this episode takes place
[05:45] ---
    during the same time
    period as two episodes back.
[05:47] ---
    Hmm, zapping, huh?
[05:49] ---
    Anime sure has become
    a lot more complicated.
[05:52] ---
    After all, this is the era of DTT,
    EPG recording, digital coloring,
[05:55] ---
    outsourcing whole episodes overseas,
[05:57] ---
    the leaking of storyboards
    to online auctions, and manga ministers...
[06:02] ---
    Yes, it can't be helped.
[06:03] ---
    I don't like it, but I'll go along
    with that course of action.
[06:06] ---
    Especially since it's looking like
    I might not have to go to school.
[06:08] ---
    Oh, dear, so that's
    the tack you're taking this time.
SIGN    Oh dear
[06:12] ---
    "'All righty, I'm off to school!'
[06:14] ---
    "Sakuya left the room in high spirits,
[06:16] ---
    "but she suddenly got the urge
    to watch M-1 DVDs
[06:18] ---
    "and she u-turned back
    to second floor of the residence.
[06:19] ---
    "And click. When she opened the door
    to the gaming room, there she found..."
SIGN    Heh heh heh heh....
[06:28] ---
    You saw me. Bastard,
    you're not getting out of here alive.
SIGN    You~~~ saw~~~
     me~~~ Bastard...
[06:31] ---
    Makita. Kunieda.
[06:32] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[06:35] ---
    Nooo! Wait! Oh, you're going to break me!
[06:38] ---
    Eh? It's not a small fire?
[06:40] ---
    Wait! What's a game console doin',
    talkin' like it's totally normal?!
[06:44] ---
    This is horrible... I'm all sticky, tima.
[06:47] ---
    "Tima"? What's with that
    artificial-soundin' sentence endin'?
[06:50] ---
    Was that the cuttin' edge for yer time?
[06:53] ---
    Ah-ha, I bet you're the demon king
    inside that game or somethin'.
[06:57] ---
    What superhuman deductive powers!
[06:59] ---
    Tima! How did you know?!
[07:01] ---
    It seems she was really right.
[07:03] ---
    Ah, I knew it!
[07:05] ---
    Yeah, lemme guess.
    'Cause you're a crappy game,
[07:07] ---
    you've gotten shoddy
    treatment over the years
[07:08] ---
    and the resentment's been
    gradually buildin' up,
[07:10] ---
    and with yer rage over
    what happened last night,
[07:12] ---
    ya finally became aware as a monster.
[07:13] ---
    Yeah, that's 'bout what happened, right?
[07:15] ---
    Wh-What superhuman deductive powers, tima!
[07:18] ---
    I already said that.
[07:19] ---
    Besides, I may not look it,
[07:21] ---
    but I'm a Kansai person, who's so
    capable I even turned down Hakuou.
[07:23] ---
    And we don't got enough time.
[07:24] ---
    Makita! Kunieda! Shut that thing down
    before it gets up to no good!
[07:28] ---
    Go after its reset button or the power cord!
[07:30] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[07:31] ---
    N-Nooo! Don't come near me, tima!
[07:33] ---
    But that "tima" sentence
    endin' sure gets on my nerves.
[07:36] ---
    Wait... Huh?
[07:37] ---
    Tima!
[07:38] ---
    You will be punished!
[07:48] ---
    The Demon King's castle!
SIGN    On Sale
SIGN    Demon King the Great Slygian of Abe (temp)
[08:11] ---
    I can't move! I'm unable to escape, tima!
[08:15] ---
    You will be punished! You will be
    punished! You will be punished!
[08:18] ---
    Oh, shut up, shut up, shut up!
[08:21] ---
    And after I finally got out
    into the real world, too...
[08:24] ---
    Th-The hero will come
    at the end of the world...
[08:27] ---
    That's right, tima! I'm the final boss.
SIGN    House For Sale
[08:30] ---
    And this castle is the stage
    for the final battle.
[08:32] ---
    If I can turn the tables on the hero here...
SIGN    That will be the end of dreams...
[08:43] ---
    Tima!
[08:45] ---
    This time, I just might
    get out of this place, tima!
[08:48] ---
    Um, don't you normally get sent back
    to the title screen or something?
[08:52] ---
    All right! Now that's decided,
    I better start by capturing the hero, tima!
[08:55] ---
    Not that she's listening...
[08:57] ---
    Push.
SIGN    Ultimate Super Awesome Demon King Guillotine Scythe
[09:15] ---
    Th-That should do it!
[09:17] ---
    Um, Mr. Hero, please fall
    for the trap! Tima!
[09:24] ---
    M-Maria, what do you think of this?!
[09:26] ---
    Oh, my, it's fantastic!
[09:27] ---
    Tima!
[09:29] ---
    Where are you going?
[09:31] ---
    You can't walk around the residence
    dressed in a sailor uniform.
[09:35] ---
    Tima-ma!
[09:38] ---
    Tima! Tima! Tima! Tima!
[09:41] ---
    Tima! Tima! Tima! Tima!
[09:43] ---
    Tima! Tima! Tima! Tima!
    Tima! Tima! Tima! Tima!
[09:46] ---
    Demon King the Great Stygian of Abe (temp)
[09:50] ---
    gave herself over to lonely tears.
[09:52] ---
    They're awful. No one will notice me, tima.
[09:56] ---
    You will be punished!
[09:59] ---
    Oh, shut up, shut up, shut up!
[10:04] ---
    Huh? Has someone come, tima?
[10:07] ---
    No answer.
[10:08] ---
    What? After we came all this way
    to see Nagi's new butler?
[10:13] ---
    It can't be helped.
    As much as it breaks my heart,
[10:17] ---
    I guess we'll have to head out
    to Ekoda or something.
[10:19] ---
    Yes. And skip classes, of course.
SIGN    Sanzenin
[10:28] ---
    What is this?
[10:31] ---
    What? Wait!
[10:32] ---
    Miki?!
[10:39] ---
    Miki, your panties are grownup.
[10:41] ---
    They are new.
[10:42] ---
    Let me see.
SIGN    Can't show you!
[10:54] ---
    Owowow...
[10:56] ---
    Wh-What in the world?!
[10:57] ---
    Heavy...
[10:58] ---
    Th-Thank you for noticing me!
[11:02] ---
    Uh... Ahem.
[11:03] ---
    Now, heroes, hurry up and
    overcome the trials and tribulations,
[11:05] ---
    I hear a boinging sound.
[11:06] ---
    and get to the castle, where I,
    Demon King Abe, am waiting for you, tima!
[11:07] ---
    What's that?
SIGN    A slime has appeared!!
[11:15] ---
    This is fail.
[11:16] ---
    Wow! It's a moving doodle!
[11:19] ---
    No, the way I see it, a crappy game
    that was downtrodden for many years...
[11:23] ---
    Omitting the rest of the explanation.
[11:24] ---
    What?! Then we're inside
    the world of a game?!
[11:28] ---
    Come, heroes! After him!
    After the eager monster!
[11:32] ---
    Hm, it cannot be helped.
[11:33] ---
    When you get down to it, it is my fault
    for picking up that controller.
[11:37] ---
    Since it has come to this...
[11:39] ---
    Y-You can't, Miki! You can't fight it alone!
SIGN     Right? Right?
SIGN     Is that your final answer?
[11:43] ---
    Great Demon King, she is the hero!
SIGN    The slime attacks!!
SIGN    The slime attacks Risa!!
SIGN    Risa is hit for 42837 points!!
[11:48] ---
    Oh, no!
SIGN     Damnd
SIGN     Sodom
[11:53] ---
    Risa is dead.
SIGN     Risa is dead!!
[11:55] ---
    What?
[11:57] ---
    I'll leave the rest to you.
[11:59] ---
    N-No way!
SIGN    The slime attacks!!
SIGN    The slime attacks Miki!! The slime attacks Izumi!!
[12:07] ---
    N-Not good! At this rate, the heroes
    I finally got will end up dead, tima!
[12:11] ---
    You will be punished!
[12:12] ---
    No!
[12:13] ---
    Push.
SIGN     Bro
SIGN     Congrats to
    King-Show comeback
SIGN     World
    Conquest
SIGN     Gorangai
SIGN     World
    Conquest
SIGN     Gorangai
SIGN     Activate
[12:22] ---
    Hey, are you okay?
[12:25] ---
    Just barely...
SIGN     Izumi Segawa
[12:27] ---
    Yes! Saved by the skin of her teeth, tima!
[12:29] ---
    You will be punished!
[12:35] ---
    Calling me from somewhere
[12:35] ---
    Somehow, I feel like on of us has it easy...
[12:37] ---
    Rissy, no fair!
[12:39] ---
    What?! It may not look it, but it's
    cramped in here and tough for me, too!
[12:40] ---
    An echoing cry on the verge of tears
[12:42] ---
    Oh, I can't wait to be revived,
    so I can fight with you!
[12:45] ---
    I'll be right there!
[12:46] ---
    Y-You do?
[12:48] ---
    Because I belong to you now
[12:48] ---
    Then, I'm sure it'll be rough,
[12:49] ---
    but we'll revive you for sure
    when we find a village or something.
[12:52] ---
    I appreciate that.
[12:53] ---
    By the way, could I ask you
    for one more favor?
[12:55] ---
    Hm? What is it?
[12:56] ---
    I'm thirsty, so go buy me a Pocari.
[12:57] ---
    Pushed around by the terribly selfish crowd
[13:03] ---
    If you're about to fall
    on to the hard asphalt
[13:04] ---
    You're awful, Rissy!
[13:05] ---
    Quit playing a game within a game!
[13:07] ---
    Y-You're wrong! Th-This is, you know!
[13:08] ---
    Here, it's okay, I'll draw you into my arms
[13:09] ---
    I'm checking to see if we can make
    contact with the outside world!
[13:12] ---
    Lies!
[13:13] ---
    While the three girls
    were bickering in the game world,
[13:16] ---
    there was just one person
    at the residence back in the real world,
[13:19] ---
    who had noticed the strange occurrence.
[13:21] ---
    What shall I do?
[13:23] ---
    I become lost yet again
    when I woke up this morning.
[13:27] ---
    Incidentally, this ghostly air...
    It is likely some sort of monster.
SIGN    Fruition of Love
[13:33] ---
    And the monster is most likely...!
SIGN    Dating Site
[13:41] ---
    Not in here...
[13:47] ---
    The top 3 will finally be
    announced in the second half!
[13:52] ---
    Sushi rice beam! (Sumeshi biimu)
[13:57] ---
    Monsieur in the mood. (Musshu muramura)
SIGN     Presented by Nagi Sanzenin
SIGN     Today's Fortunes Countdown
[13:59] ---
    Today's fortunes countdown!
SIGN    Aries 4th
    Sagittarius 5th
    Virgo 6th
    Aquarius 7th
    Pisces 8th
    Cancer 9th
    Capricorn 10th
    Leo 11th
    Libra 12th
SIGN    Today's 3rd Place
[14:09] ---
    Coming in 3rd is Cancer.
    Lucky spot is oil fields.
[14:12] ---
    There may be a wonderful
    encounter waiting for you.
SIGN    The Much-Anticipated 2nd Place
[14:16] ---
    Coming in 2nd is Taurus.
    A happy day, where everything will go well.
[14:19] ---
    Might be your one chance to quit being
    an unproductive member of society.
[14:20] ---
    1st Place
[14:21] ---
    Come, let's work up that courage!
[14:25] ---
    I-In first place is...!
[14:28] ---
    Bright smiles! A great selection!
[14:31] ---
    We, at the Rental Video
    Tachibana Shinjuku Flagship store,
[14:33] ---
    shall be awaiting you,
    the discerning customer.
[14:37] ---
    And now, please continue to enjoy
    Episode 10 of Hayate the Combat Butler,
SIGN     Showing Now Hayate the Combat Butler!
SIGN     Episode 10. Please enjoy.
[14:40] ---
    "I Saw the Tears of Snakewoman
    in the Fires of Hell".
[14:44] ---
    The three student council girls
    trapped in the cursed game world...
[14:48] ---
    ...after much pain and effort,
[14:49] ---
    finally arrived in
    an otherworldly kind of village.
[14:55] ---
    Where's the church?! We want to
    revive our friend from the coffin!
SIGN    Captain Cam
[15:00] ---
    Nuu, nuu!
[15:01] ---
    Nuu, nu-nu, nuu!
[15:02] ---
    Nu-nu, nuu, nuu, nuu!
[15:04] ---
    Wah! No matter who I talk to,
    all they say is "nuu, nuu"!
[15:08] ---
    It appears this game is too much for us.
[15:11] ---
    It cannot be helped.
    Since it has come to this...
[15:15] ---
    I'm insanely fired up right now!
[15:20] ---
    King Scascher!
[15:44] ---
    Hello?
[15:45] ---
    Yes, it is me. Miki.
[15:47] ---
    I feel bad, but please come right away.
[15:50] ---
    I'm here.
[15:51] ---
    So?
[15:52] ---
    That was fast!
[15:53] ---
    Um, Hina, you didn't get attacked
    by anything weird on your way here?
[15:57] ---
    Huh? Oh, all kinds of things showed up,
[16:00] ---
    but just I drove them away with this.
[16:02] ---
    Oooh!
[16:03] ---
    So what in the world is going on?
[16:05] ---
    Would you explain it
    to me so I can understand?
[16:07] ---
    Do not let this shock you now.
[16:09] ---
    We are actually inside a cursed game
[16:11] ---
    and mumble, mumble, omitting the rest!
[16:15] ---
    What are you saying?
[16:16] ---
    There's no way such
    an unscientific thing would happen.
[16:18] ---
    What? Uh, but...
[16:20] ---
    This is one of those things.
    Which is to say...
[16:22] ---
    Hardcore gamer Nagi must be throwing
    a large surprise event for us.
[16:28] ---
    Yup!
[16:31] ---
    But those monsters
    and things sure were well-made.
[16:32] ---
    That's our student
    council president for you.
[16:34] ---
    A super pragmatist.
[16:34] ---
    I wonder what kind of mechanism
    they have that makes them move.
[16:35] ---
    In a way, it's an incredible
    talent that she's got.
[16:37] ---
    So, you three, don't tell me you plan
    to skip our afternoon classes.
[16:40] ---
    N-No.
[16:41] ---
    Then let's finish up here
[16:43] ---
    and get back to school
    before the end of lunch break.
[16:45] ---
    Oh, but I wonder where the goal is.
[16:50] ---
    H-How promising!
[16:52] ---
    Yes! That lady is truly worthy
    of being called a hero, tima!
[16:55] ---
    You will be punished! You will be
    punished! You will be punished!
[17:02] ---
    If that lady can make it here,
[17:04] ---
    maybe I can finally be
    free of this annoying skull
[17:05] ---
    and this meaningless "tima"
    sentence ending, tima!
[17:10] ---
    Push.
SIGN    Over here, tima!
[17:19] ---
    A full set of equipment suddenly
    came falling out of the sky...
SIGN    Over here, tima!
[17:26] ---
    I see, so we're expected to use these
    to get over to that tower.
[17:30] ---
    What?
[17:31] ---
    I-Is that what it means?
[17:32] ---
    All right! Then let's all
    go defeat the Demon King!
[17:35] ---
    Hakuou, fight!
[17:38] ---
    F-Fight!
[17:39] ---
    Fight!
[17:40] ---
    Hinagiku sure is serious.
[17:41] ---
    Fight!
[17:42] ---
    It seems we can leave the rest
    of the episode to Miss Katsura.
[17:45] ---
    Yes.
[17:46] ---
    Then, since this is the perfect opportunity,
[17:48] ---
    I think I'll read some mail
    cheering us on for once.
[17:51] ---
    A postcard from penname Tama
    Fangirl of N Ward, Tokyo.
[17:54] ---
    "Hello to Hayate, Nagi, and Maria."
[17:58] ---
    Hello!
[17:59] ---
    Hello.
SIGN    Hello.
[18:02] ---
    "I always look forward to
    watching Hayate the Combat Butler."
[18:05] ---
    Good. Thank you!
[18:07] ---
    "By the way, I was surprised when
    I saw the profiles on the official homepage.
[18:10] ---
    "I had no idea that you were
    just 17 years old, Maria."
[18:14] ---
    Y-Yes, I'm 17 years old. What of it?
[18:17] ---
    "Y-You seem rather composed
    and I totally thought you were over 20.
[18:22] ---
    "Wh-Why don't you try acting
    more like a g-girl of 17 for once
[18:25] ---
    "and say things like 'uber bad'?"
[18:28] ---
    Hey, T-Tama Fangirl,
    Maria is young! She's young!
[18:31] ---
    After all...
[18:32] ---
    I see.
[18:35] ---
    So I look that old...
[18:38] ---
    I don't mean to repeat myself,
    but I am 17 years old.
[18:40] ---
    I'm bursting with freshness!
[18:41] ---
    It's not that I've aged before my time,
[18:42] ---
    it's just that I face endless
    hardship every day,
[18:44] ---
    thanks to some people.
[18:46] ---
    S-Sorry about that! We're
    always grateful that we have you!
[18:49] ---
    Right, Hayate?!
[18:51] ---
    Hey, why haven't you said anything?!
[18:54] ---
    Since the majority of the cast
    is comprised of stooge characters,
[18:56] ---
    I handle the straight man role
    to make things interesting.
[18:59] ---
    It's only natural, since I'm the one
    with the most common sense here.
[19:01] ---
    B-But then, a little girl sent
    in this postcard to the show. Scary.
SIGN    Maria seems kind of mean
[19:13] ---
    It's fine. It's fine. I'm just...
[19:18] ---
    Bright smiles! A great selection!
[19:19] ---
    Wait! Wha?! Hayate!
[19:21] ---
    Why aren't you saying?!
[19:21] ---
    We, at the Rental Video
    Tachibana Shinkuju Flagship store,
[19:22] ---
    Um, on to the next postcard!
[19:24] ---
    shall be awaiting you,
    the discerning customer.
[19:24] ---
    A postcard from Sergeant Naohikov
    Furuitch of K Ward, Tokyo.
[19:27] ---
    And now, please continue to enjoy
    Episode 10 of Hayate the Combat Butler...
[19:28] ---
    "I love Maria!"
[19:32] ---
    Last battle!
SIGN     Can't show you
SIGN     Can't show
[19:37] ---
    Having crossed oceans
    and beat all kinds of dungeons,
[19:41] ---
    with almost 100 hours
    of play time behind them,
[19:43] ---
    the student council party
    finally made it to the Demon King!
[19:50] ---
    Finally, the time has come
    for the last battle
[19:53] ---
    to determine the fate of this universe.
[19:55] ---
    O Demon King the Great
    Stygian of Abe (temp),
[19:58] ---
    come fight us fair and square!
SIGN     Welcome Heroes Party
SIGN     Reserved
[20:04] ---
    I could not have asked for more, tima.
[20:06] ---
    Now, face my ultimate
    super lethal technique!
[20:09] ---
    Push.
[20:19] ---
    The Demon King has been defeated.
SIGN    The Demon King has been defeated.
[20:21] ---
    What?!
[20:22] ---
    Weak! The Demon King's weak!
[20:26] ---
    Truly a hero. Your swordsmanship
    was brilliant, tima.
[20:29] ---
    Huh? But I haven't done anything yet.
[20:32] ---
    I can resign myself to my fate now.
[20:34] ---
    I can feel at peace crossing over
    into the other world, tima.
[20:38] ---
    Or so I thought, but I don't
    want to go, after all, tima.
[20:40] ---
    Though, I feel like it
    wouldn't be so bad to go, tima.
[20:43] ---
    Hmm... But then again...
[20:44] ---
    Which is it?!
[20:45] ---
    She is being damned indecisive.
[20:46] ---
    You will be punished
    for not making up your mind!
SIGN    Ending 4 "Beyond Oblivion"
[20:57] ---
    Hinagiku Katsura and
    the three student council girls
SIGN    Hinagiku Katsura
SIGN    and the three student council girls
[21:01] ---
    defeated the Demon King in this way
SIGN    defeated the Demon King in this way
[21:02] ---
    and traversed space-time,
    returning safely to the real world.
SIGN    and traversed space-time, returning safely to the real world.
[21:06] ---
    With their memories of their adventures
    in the game world completely lost to them...
SIGN    With their memories of their adventures in the game world
SIGN    completely lost to them...
[21:09] ---
    Thank you, hero. Thank you,
    Hakuou Academy student council.
[21:13] ---
    Kind of grateful. Kind of a happy ending.
[21:15] ---
    However, your battle has only just begun.
[21:19] ---
    I will fight again next time
    to win the role of protagonist!
SIGN    Izumi Segawa
     Class: Normal
    Person
SIGN    Specialty:
    Nothing Notable
[21:23] ---
    That was kind of fun, wasn't it?
SIGN    Miki Hanabishi
    Class: Fox Hound
SIGN    Specialty:
    Intel Gathering
[21:25] ---
    I suppose that's
    a happily-ever-after for now.
SIGN    Risa Asakaze
    Class: Aspiring
     Good-for-Nothing
SIGN    Specialty: H°rricane M°xer
SIGN    Hinagiku Katsura
    Class: Student Council President
[21:28] ---
    Yes.
[21:31] ---
    Hey, wait! Aren't ya forgettin' somethin'?!
[21:35] ---
    Pardon me. I opened the door normally.
[21:39] ---
    What's up with this old
    Showa-era punch line?!
[21:42] ---
    Is it me or are we gettin'
    shoddy treatment lately?!
[21:44] ---
    It's always been like that.
[21:46] ---
    Uh, next time, we will return
    to our normal format
[21:48] ---
    and bring you a butler episode
    that will thrill you!
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:03] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:03] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:13] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:13] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:19] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:19] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:23] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:23] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:29] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:29] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:34] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:34] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:40] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:40] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:45] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:45] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:50] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:50] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:00] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:00] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:06] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:06] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:15] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:15] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:26] ---
    Nagi's...
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Since Hayate is out this time I will be
    doing as I please with this segment!
[23:33] ---
    Oh, my, this could mean trouble.
[23:34] ---
    Now's your only chance
    to sit back and relax, Maria.
[23:37] ---
    What?
[23:37] ---
    The fact that I am in charge of this segment
[23:39] ---
    means that I am free to do whatever I wish!
[23:41] ---
    In response to requests from Maria fans,
    I could insert a fan service shot of Maria!
[23:44] ---
    Nooo!
[23:45] ---
    Nobody may want it, but I could
    also insert a shot of Klaus bathing!
[23:48] ---
    Nooo!
[23:49] ---
    Keep doing this and production
    will never catch up to the schedule!
[23:52] ---
    Oh, that would be bad.
    We won't do any more Klaus after this!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    Nagi, why don't we go
    to the primary family residence for once,
[23:59] ---
    where your grandfather resides?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    I would like to introduce Hayate as well.
[24:02] ---
    I don't want to. Besides,
    I don't think there's any need
[24:04] ---
    to pay our respects
    to that old geezer at this point.
[24:06] ---
    Man, it's been a long time
    since I've seen Grandpa Mikado.
[24:09] ---
    I'm gonna pester him for some pocket change.
[24:10] ---
    What's this, Saku? You're going, too?
[24:13] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    "The Value of My Life: Priceless".
[24:17] ---
    In other words, your life
    is utterly meaningless.
[24:19] ---
    The Value of My Life: Priceless
[24:20] ---
    An armor runs within your heart!

11 - The Value of My Life: Priceless

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    Hayate was about to welcome
    a rare, peaceful morning.
[00:14] ---
    However, he had no way
    of knowing that this...
[00:18] ---
    would turn out to be a life-altering day!
[00:22] ---
    Nagi, why don't we go to the primary family
    residence for once, where your grandfather resides?
[00:29] ---
    That is... I would like
    introduce Hayate as well.
[00:32] ---
    You don't have to express
    such undisguised loathing...
[00:35] ---
    Who is this grandfather?
[00:37] ---
    Grandfather Mikado, the head
    of the Sanzenin family.
[00:41] ---
    Head of the family?
[00:43] ---
    In other words,
[00:44] ---
    the person currently in possession
    of the Sanzenin family estate.
[00:47] ---
    I feel like I could end up getting
    fired if I make the wrong impression...
[00:53] ---
    No, he could easily wipe you
    off the face of this planet.
[01:01] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:04] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:07] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:10] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:14] ---
    Yes!
[01:15] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:19] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:24] ---
    The human body holds untold powers.
[01:27] ---
    The more you train, the more...
[01:30] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:30] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:36] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:36] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:43] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:43] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:46] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:46] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:51] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:51] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:55] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:55] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:59] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:59] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:04] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:04] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:07] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:07] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:14] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:14] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:21] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:21] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:24] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:24] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:27] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:27] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:33] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:33] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:40] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:40] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:58] SIGN
    The Value of My Life: Priceless
[03:05] ---
    So we hired a new butler.
[03:08] ---
    I don't think there's any need to pay our
    respects to that old geezer at this point.
[03:12] ---
    Don't say such things.
[03:14] ---
    Your grandfather is the only
    immediate family you have.
[03:17] ---
    Man, it's been a long time
    since I've seen Grandpa Mikado.
[03:22] ---
    Wait... Never mind all that.
    Why are you here?
[03:25] ---
    Oh, please! I'm related to the
    Sanzenin family, too, remember?
[03:29] ---
    But what kind of man is your grandfather?
[03:32] ---
    If this were Dragon Quest, he'd be Zoma.
[03:34] ---
    In the traditional storytelling
    world, he'd be Danshi.
[03:37] ---
    W-Will I do okay?
[03:39] ---
    Meeting such a terrifying sounding person...
[03:42] ---
    I doubt you'll be okay.
[03:43] ---
    If ya offend him,
[03:45] ---
    that man could easily crush
    an indebted butler's life.
[03:50] ---
    After all, he's da man who destroyed Compile,
[03:53] ---
    just 'cause Puyo Pop was hard.
[03:54] ---
    What?!
[03:55] ---
    Incidentally, Nomura Toys'
    downfall was also 'cause of him.
[03:59] ---
    Are you serious?!
[04:01] ---
    She's kidding.
[04:03] ---
    Well, in any case, he's
    kind of a fiendish guy,
[04:06] ---
    so try not to be taken in if
    he says anything odd to you.
[04:09] ---
    I-I see...
[04:11] ---
    What's that?
[04:15] ---
    I'll have you know, it's not the castle...
[04:17] ---
    of the poisonous-apple-eating
    princess of the mouse kingdom.
[04:20] ---
    Master Mikado Sanzenin.
    This is her grandfather's primary residence.
[04:24] ---
    Wait... So, what country are we in?
[04:30] ---
    What line of work is your grandfather in?
[04:34] ---
    Hmm... Oil baron, I guess?
[04:36] ---
    That is not a line of work...
[04:39] ---
    Hayate was belatedly
    coming to the realization
[04:42] ---
    that Nagi was not just your
    run-of-the-mill rich girl...
[04:51] ---
    Welcome home, Miss Nagi.
[04:54] ---
    Right. I'm back.
[04:56] ---
    But that she was an INCREDIBLY rich girl.
[05:00] ---
    But talk about a stuffy bunch.
[05:04] ---
    And Miss Sakuya and Maria, it
    is good of you to come as well.
[05:06] ---
    Not at all.
[05:08] ---
    Come, this way, please.
[05:10] ---
    By the way, I apologize for disturbing
    you upon your return, but...
[05:14] ---
    What shall we do with this
    suspicious individual?
[05:14] ---
    Help! Help!
[05:16] ---
    He had snuck aboard the chopper.
[05:16] ---
    Help! Help!
[05:18] ---
    He looks incredibly suspicious!
[05:18] ---
    Help! Help!
[05:21] ---
    I can appreciate your sentiment, but
    he's not a suspicious individual.
[05:24] ---
    He's Himegami's successor
    and he serves as my butler.
[05:28] ---
    This shabby-looking man, who
    seems to have no luck with money?
[05:32] ---
    Nobody asked your opinion.
[05:33] ---
    But... um... that is...
[05:36] ---
    Hayate put up with the comments.
[05:38] ---
    Because he most certainly did
    not have any luck with money
[05:41] ---
    and there was no question
    that he was shabby-looking.
[05:46] ---
    You didn't have to emphasize it like that.
[05:50] ---
    But man, that was hilarious!
[05:52] ---
    Now, Saku, don't laugh at him so much.
[05:56] ---
    It's fine.
[05:57] ---
    I knew from the start that
    I didn't fit in here anyway.
[06:02] ---
    Well, don't let it bother you.
[06:04] ---
    They just called it like they saw it.
    There was no malice behind it.
[06:07] ---
    That is right. You will only waste
    your time letting it get to you.
[06:10] ---
    It's true that I'm 150 million yen in debt,
[06:14] ---
    but do I really look like I
    have such poor luck with money?
[06:18] ---
    In this world, there are more important
    things than money, like compassion.
[06:22] ---
    Each individual must be considerate
    of the planet's future.
[06:26] ---
    They won't look me in the eye...
[06:28] ---
    Oh, that reminds me.
[06:30] ---
    Nagi, being dressed like that for your
    meeting with your grandfather is...
[06:34] ---
    You're right.
[06:35] ---
    Okay, I'm going to change, so go
    get some fresh air or something.
[06:40] ---
    Right...
[06:46] ---
    I got kicked out.
[06:49] ---
    Still, this is a belated realization,
[06:51] ---
    but to let a man like me,
    so deeply in debt, run loose
[06:53] ---
    in this place packed full of
    treasures seems far too imprudent.
[07:00] ---
    Is this something of value?
[07:04] ---
    It makes a good sound...
[07:06] ---
    This piece alone just might be able
    to pay off my 150 million yen debt!
[07:11] ---
    At best, that vase will fetch
    5 million on Yahoo Auctions,
[07:16] ---
    so you won't be able to pay off your debt.
[07:19] ---
    I'm sorry! I'm sorry! It was
    just an impulsive thought!
[07:29] ---
    You needn't worry. I can
    tell, just by looking at you,
[07:32] ---
    that you're not the kind of person
    who would do such a thing.
[07:36] ---
    Hey, now. Don't look at me like,
    "What's this senile old man saying?"
[07:42] ---
    P-Pardon me.
[07:44] ---
    Um, who might you be?
[07:46] ---
    I'm a member of this household.
[07:48] ---
    I'm taking care of the yard right now.
[07:50] ---
    Oh, you're a gardener.
[07:53] ---
    I swear... You don't have
    faith in my insight, do you?
[07:57] ---
    I'll have you know!
[08:01] ---
    Whoops. Sorry about that.
[08:05] ---
    All right, I'll show you just
    how formidable my insight is,
[08:09] ---
    so come along with me!
[08:11] ---
    This old man's smile sparkles
    like that of a boy...
[08:20] ---
    Behold!
[08:24] ---
    Say, Maria, this outfit is a bit big.
[08:28] ---
    Oh, I knew it!
[08:32] ---
    That's just peeping!
[08:34] ---
    To train one's insight,
    one must work daily...
[08:37] ---
    And after working daily, what kind
    of criminal do you intend to become?!
[08:45] ---
    I just don't get it, though.
[08:47] ---
    What is someone like you doing
    with a debt of 150 million?
[08:51] ---
    It was originally my parents' gambling debt.
[08:56] ---
    My parents are incredible good-for-nothings
[08:59] ---
    and they gifted me to some "very
    generous people" as collateral.
[09:03] ---
    And then, Miss Nagi took on that debt for me.
[09:08] ---
    So now, I am in the process
    of returning it over 40 years.
[09:12] ---
    I see.
[09:14] ---
    I am really grateful to Miss Nagi.
[09:17] ---
    So grandpa, you mustn't peep at her, either.
[09:22] ---
    Well, I'm going to go now.
[09:27] ---
    In other words,
[09:29] ---
    your life is utterly meaningless.
[09:38] ---
    What?
[09:41] ---
    You're awfully insipid for a man
    that Nagi's placed her faith in.
[09:46] ---
    Grandpa, who are you?
[09:50] ---
    My insight is the real thing!
[09:52] ---
    The bursting of the bubble,
    the change in government,
[09:54] ---
    and even Toshi losing his hair!
[09:56] ---
    I anticipated it all with these eyes of mine!
[09:59] ---
    Even the unprecedented little sister boom!
[10:01] ---
    I foresaw its coming since before the war!
[10:04] ---
    And these eyes are telling me now...
[10:06] ---
    Your life is even more meaningless
    than the lives of your scummy parents!
[10:12] ---
    I, Mikado Sanzenin, assure you that it is.
[10:18] ---
    My life is...
[10:20] ---
    ...meaningless?
[10:21] ---
    Yes, it's meaningless.
[10:23] ---
    A life spent merely for the
    sake of repaying a debt...
[10:27] ---
    ...is utterly meaningless.
[10:30] ---
    However, if you still wish to make
    your life something of value...
[10:38] ---
    I-Is this...
[10:41] ---
    ...a levitation stone?
[10:42] ---
    No! That is your guide!
[10:46] ---
    If you believe that your
    life may yet have meaning,
[10:50] ---
    do not lose it, do not
    let it be taken from you.
[10:51] ---
    Keep it with you until the day comes.
[10:55] ---
    And if you are able to obtain the thing
[10:59] ---
    at the end of the road that it leads you to,
[11:01] ---
    never mind 150 million. A
    billion! Even 10 billion!
[11:05] ---
    All of that will surely be within your reach.
[11:11] ---
    With the meaning of his life
    denied in its entirety,
[11:15] ---
    will Hayate be able to
    begin walking down the road
[11:18] ---
    shown to him by the pendant?
[11:20] ---
    To be continued in the second half.
[11:24] ---
    Wait...
[11:25] ---
    Hey, Maria, are we okay with
    not having a punch line?!
[11:28] ---
    Oh, please.
[11:29] ---
    We have not had much of a punch
    line in the past, either.
[11:33] ---
    Not good! If there isn't at
    least one punch line a minute,
[11:35] ---
    a Kansai person's blood starts to tingle!
[11:41] ---
    Don't run! It won't make for a punch line!
[11:43] ---
    That punch line is already an empty shell!
[11:47] ---
    I say this to you, it is garbage!
[11:49] ---
    Shaddup! Punch it already!
[11:53] ---
    All right, I guess it didn't happen.
[11:59] ---
    Lambada.
[12:03] ---
    The baby boomer generation.
[12:06] ---
    O Granddaughter, do you want to
    inherit the Sanzenin family fortune?
[12:10] ---
    Huh?
[12:12] ---
    I don't particularly want it,
[12:13] ---
    but if it means that you'll
    be dying soon, I'd welcome it.
[12:17] ---
    Maria! O Maria! My granddaughter
    is being mean to me!
[12:21] ---
    Oh, my, now that is a problem.
[12:23] ---
    It's not like I'm being mean.
[12:24] ---
    Grandpa, never mind the fortune,
    can I get some pocket change?
[12:27] ---
    Besides, even without all that,
[12:29] ---
    as long as I have the World Business
    Satellite show and the stock market,
[12:32] ---
    I will never have money problems.
[12:36] ---
    Damn it! Uselessly gaining more
    and more knowledge every year...
[12:39] ---
    You're the one who had me educated
    so that would happen, remember?
[12:43] ---
    However...
[12:47] ---
    I don't recall teaching you
    to draw such worthless manga!
[12:54] SIGN
    Seen From Below
SIGN    Can't show you!
[12:55] ---
    Where the hell did you
    get a hold of my manga?!
[12:58] ---
    My granddaughter really is mean to me!
[13:01] ---
    Yes, yes.
[13:03] ---
    Oh, but Grandfather, why did
    you suddenly bring this up?
[13:07] ---
    Oh, the truth is, at this rate...
[13:10] ---
    ...Nagi will end up dead.
[13:13] SIGN
    Loser Park
[13:19] SIGN
    -inner
[13:20] ---
    Th-There it is again...
[13:24] ---
    All right! I got it this time!
[13:26] SIGN
    Winner
[13:28] ---
    Yes!
[13:34] ---
    That's ominous...
[13:42] ---
    All I ever thought about was money,
    because of the way my parents were...
[13:46] ---
    I'd never even thought about my own life...
[13:49] ---
    But am I okay with my life being like that?
[13:53] ---
    A life spent solely for the
    purpose of repaying debt...
[13:58] ---
    Hayate!
[14:00] ---
    Oh, Miss.
[14:05] ---
    I've been looking for you.
[14:07] ---
    Come on, let's hurry up and leave.
[14:08] ---
    What? We're leaving already?
[14:11] ---
    Yes, I can't put up with that
    stinking old geezer anymore!
[14:15] ---
    Did something happen?
[14:17] ---
    Something did happen...
    Or rather, will happen...
[14:21] ---
    What?
[14:29] ---
    What is about to happen?
[14:34] ---
    Wh-Wh-Wha... Who is this person?!
[14:37] ---
    Damn! So he's really come.
[14:43] ---
    You are quite skilled to
    dodge Gilbert's sword!
[14:49] ---
    Wh-Who is this fake-sounding foreigner?
[14:53] ---
    Um... It's a long story, but...
[14:57] ---
    He's the man who may inherit all
    of the Sanzenin family fortune.
[15:01] ---
    I-Inherit it all?
[15:03] ---
    Um, in other words...
[15:06] ---
    The story will grind to a halt if
    we leave the explanation to Nagi,
[15:10] ---
    What?!
[15:10] ---
    so we will have you watch the
    rest of the earlier scene here.
[15:15] ---
    Oh, but Grandfather, why did
    you suddenly bring this up?
[15:19] ---
    Oh, the truth is, at this rate...
[15:22] ---
    ...Nagi will end up dead.
[15:26] ---
    Huh?! Why would I end up dead?!
[15:29] ---
    Have you finally gone senile,
    you stinking old geezer?!
[15:32] ---
    I have not gone senile, nor do I stink.
[15:35] ---
    Just think about it, Granddaughter.
[15:38] ---
    I do not have long to live.
[15:39] ---
    And once I die, the family fortune
    will go to you in its entirety.
[15:43] ---
    However, many of our relatives
    do not favor this arrangement.
[15:48] ---
    It's true.
[15:49] ---
    There are people out there who would
    sell their son for 150 million,
[15:53] ---
    so it seems plausible that some
    may try to take Nagi's life.
[15:56] ---
    Indeed.
[15:57] ---
    So I came up with an idea.
[15:59] ---
    If someone can fulfill a certain condition,
[16:00] ---
    I would leave the Sanzenin
    family fortune, not to Nagi,
[16:04] ---
    but to that person instead.
[16:07] ---
    Oh-ho. And what is this condition?
[16:10] ---
    Yes, this condition is...
[16:17] ---
    I'm sorry.
[16:20] ---
    I've lost.
[16:22] ---
    I'll leave the family fortune to you,
[16:25] ---
    so please have mercy on me.
[16:29] ---
    ...and make you apologize in tears.
[16:34] SIGN
    The Tail Wagging the Dog
[16:37] ---
    I'd rather die than spout
    such embarrassing lines!
[16:43] ---
    I don't know...
[16:44] ---
    I just don't understand the things
    that rich people come up with.
[16:47] ---
    Not to worry, I don't understand it, either.
[16:53] ---
    So, that being the case...
[16:55] ---
    Please apologize in tears to me!
[16:58] ---
    Like hell I'm apologizing to you! Moron!
[17:03] ---
    Please apologize in tears to me!
[17:07] ---
    Don't you have any pride or anything?!
[17:08] ---
    Doing such things is
    useless! Get out of here!
[17:12] ---
    Is that so? Then you leave me no choice.
[17:23] ---
    What are you doing to Hayate?!
[17:27] ---
    According to Old Man Mikado...
[17:31] ---
    If I just beat that weak-looking
    butler to a pulp,
[17:36] ---
    there's a chance that the Miss
    might apologize in tears.
[17:40] ---
    So I'm gonna beat the crap outta him
    and make the family fortune mine!
[17:46] ---
    If the Miss can no longer inherit
    the Sanzenin family fortune,
[17:50] ---
    that means she won't be enormously
    rich like she is now, right?
[17:55] ---
    If that were to happen,
    would this girl be alone...?
[17:58] ---
    Rendered homeless, like me?
[18:04] ---
    The rice porridge is ready.
[18:06] ---
    I'm sorry, Maria, for all the
    trouble I'm putting you through...
[18:11] ---
    We promised not to talk about that, remember?
[18:14] ---
    If only Hayate would pay you back...
[18:19] ---
    I shouldn't have lent him
    that 150 million yen.
[18:26] ---
    That could be possible!
[18:28] ---
    Hayate, watch out!
[18:31] ---
    Prepare to meet your fate!
[18:35] ---
    Money! Money!
[18:37] ---
    Damn it! Why you!
[18:40] ---
    Money!
[18:43] ---
    A life spent merely for the
    sake of repaying a debt...
[18:47] ---
    ...is utterly meaningless.
[18:48] ---
    Meaningless!
[18:49] ---
    Meaningless!
[18:54] ---
    The Miss came to my rescue, wearing
    that silly-looking mask...
[18:59] ---
    The Miss put her heart and soul
    into nursing me back to health...
[19:04] ---
    To think the Miss might face
    adversity because of me...
[19:09] ---
    At any rate, I'll think of a
    way to repay my debt quickly.
[19:13] ---
    But right now, there's the Miss!
[19:16] ---
    I don't yet know what the
    meaning of my life is,
[19:20] ---
    but right now, I just have to...
[19:23] ---
    Why you!
[19:25] ---
    Universe!
[19:50] ---
    H-Hayate...
[19:54] ---
    I'll protect you.
[19:57] ---
    What?
[20:01] ---
    Anyone... who tries to make you cry...
[20:06] ---
    I'll protect you from them.
[20:12] ---
    Would that... be all right?
[20:23] ---
    Um...
[20:25] ---
    That is, uh...
[20:35] ---
    I-I'll be counting on you.
[20:43] ---
    What's this? Is this gonna become
    a battle anime startin' next week?
[20:47] ---
    No, it will not.
[20:53] ---
    The boy shook free of uncertainty
[20:56] ---
    and found meaning in his life,
    protecting his mistress.
[21:01] ---
    In which direction does butler
    Hayate's tomorrow lie?!
[21:03] ---
    Next time, he will be fighting
    with all kinds of circumstances.
[21:11] ---
    Don't you lose that pendant, boy.
[21:14] ---
    Still...
[21:15] ---
    Oh, Maria has gone...
[21:20] ---
    That hurt!
[21:21] ---
    Wh-What's this? You're still here?
[21:23] ---
    I still haven't gotten my
    pocket change, after all.
[21:26] ---
    Never mind that, how do you plan to get home?
[21:28] ---
    Nagi and the others are over there already.
[21:30] ---
    What?!
[21:35] ---
    Y'all left me here all by my lonesome?
[21:38] SIGN
    Wooooooo...
[21:41] ---
    What a cold era this is!
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:02] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:02] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:13] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:13] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:19] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:19] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:23] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:23] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:29] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:29] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:34] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:34] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:40] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:40] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:45] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:45] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:50] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:50] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:00] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:00] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:05] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:05] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:14] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:14] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:26] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    Unfortunately, our week of being
    reinforced by Maria ends today.
[23:34] ---
    What? It does?
[23:36] ---
    Starting next time, that hugely
    popular character will be appearing!
[23:39] ---
    Could that possibly be the #1 in
    popularity polls? That Hina...
[23:43] ---
    No!
[23:46] ---
    Hayate, it will be Nagi's turn
    on duty starting next time.
[23:48] ---
    Or rather, this is the end of my week.
[23:50] ---
    Aren't I being treated
    awfully poorly for all that?
[23:52] ---
    Look forward to next time with keen interest!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] SIGN
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    Um, is that you, Hayate?
[23:58] ---
    M-Miss Nishizawa...
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:59] ---
    We haven't seen each other since Christmas.
[24:00] ---
    What in the world have you
    been doing since then?
[24:02] ---
    Well, a lot of things happened...
[24:03] ---
    I'm working as a butler
    at a certain mansion, now.
[24:06] ---
    What? Is that a joke?
[24:08] ---
    Oh, but I'm glad. I'm really
    happy that I got to see you.
[24:11] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:13] ---
    "Long Ago, We Learned from a Space Sheriff
[24:15] ---
    "that Being Young is About Not Looking Back".
[24:17] ---
    Wait, Hayate!
[24:19] ---
    My... My feelings for you are...!
[24:19] SIGN
    Long Ago, We Learned from a Space Sheriff
    that Being Young is About Not Looking Back
[24:21] ---
    You'll get to see Newtypes in combat!

12 - Long Ago, We Learned from a Space Sheriff that Being Young is About Not Looking Back

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright and
    sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:11] SIGN
    My Future Dream
[00:14] SIGN
    Hamakaze Elementary School
[00:15] ---
    My future dream.
[00:16] ---
    Grade 1, Peach Class, Hayate Ayasaki.
[00:19] ---
    Regardless of whether it
    is a weekday or a Sunday,
[00:22] ---
    my parents are always lying
    around, doing nothing at home.
[00:25] ---
    My father works on self-realization
[00:27] ---
    and my mother is intent on capturing
    the dream of spinning reels.
[00:32] ---
    My father said, "If we win it big,
    we'll take a trip to Hawaii!"
[00:36] ---
    But my mother laughed, "They
    won't issue passports to us,
[00:39] ---
    "so we won't be able to do that, hahaha."
[00:41] ---
    So there is never-ending
    laughter in my home.
[00:43] ---
    And so, my future dream is...
[00:53] ---
    I wonder if it's because of what I was
    told yesterday at the Miss's home.
[00:59] ---
    In other words,
[01:01] ---
    your life is...
[01:02] ---
    ...utterly meaningless.
[01:07] ---
    No, pull yourself together! I
    made up my mind, didn't I?!
[01:11] ---
    That I don't yet know what
    the meaning of my life is,
[01:13] ---
    but that for now, I'm just
    going to protect the Miss!
[01:19] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:22] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:25] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:29] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:32] ---
    Yes!
[01:33] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:37] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:41] ---
    Hello, I'm Hayate Ayasaki!
[01:43] ---
    All right! I'm going to
    work hard again today!
[01:48] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:48] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:54] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:54] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:01] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:01] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:04] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:04] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:09] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:09] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:13] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:13] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:17] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:17] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:22] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:22] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:25] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:25] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:32] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:32] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:39] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:39] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:42] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:42] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:45] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:45] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:51] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:51] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:58] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:58] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:17] SIGN
    Long Ago, We Learned from a Space Sheriff
    that Being Young is About Not Looking Back
[03:22] ---
    What? My future dream?
[03:24] ---
    Yes!
[03:26] ---
    Hmm, if I had to say,
[03:29] ---
    I worry ceaselessly about what kind of
    adult a certain girl will grow up to be.
[03:33] ---
    So I suppose you could say my dream is
[03:36] ---
    that she becomes a respectable
    member of society.
[03:38] ---
    Uh...
[03:39] ---
    But why did you suddenly bring this up?
[03:41] ---
    What? No, well...
[03:43] ---
    How do I put this?
[03:44] ---
    A person's dream is sort of like the
    driving force behind his life, right?
[03:48] ---
    I see... I-I suppose so.
[03:51] ---
    Wait. But according to that logic,
[03:53] ---
    the driving force behind my
    life seems a bit questionable.
[03:56] ---
    Even Ryoma Sakamoto said,
[03:58] ---
    "As human beings, we ought to have
    dreams as huge as the Pacific Ocean."
[04:03] ---
    Mozart was also vocal about how "life
    is brilliant because we dream".
[04:07] ---
    "The lives of those incapable of
    big dreams must be like garbage,"
[04:10] ---
    is another quote from a certain
    spy for the British Empire...
[04:13] ---
    Wait. What?
[04:14] ---
    Is something the matter, Maria?
[04:16] ---
    No, somehow, I'm starting to feel
    ever so slightly depressed...
[04:20] ---
    But Hayate, you really are
    behaving a little weird.
[04:23] ---
    What?
[04:24] ---
    Could it be that Nagi's grandfather
    said something to you?
[04:27] ---
    What?!
[04:28] ---
    W-Well, it's important to always
    remember one's initial enthusiasm.
[04:31] ---
    I mean, I just plan to continue
    to work hard for the Miss's sake
[04:35] ---
    as the true Hayate Ayasaki!
[04:37] ---
    Oh, wait...
[04:46] ---
    I didn't get any sleep at all because
    of what happened yesterday...
[04:53] ---
    Anyone... who tries to make you cry...
[04:56] ---
    I'll protect you from them.
[04:58] ---
    Would that... be all right?
[05:04] ---
    When all's said and done,
    Hayate is still just so cool.
[05:10] ---
    Wow!
[05:11] ---
    Hayate is working hard.
[05:12] ---
    Oh!
[05:14] ---
    Something about initial enthusiasm
    being important and future dreams.
[05:17] ---
    Hayate said that? What future dreams?
[05:20] ---
    He's suddenly become like a salaryman,
    who's rediscovered life,
[05:24] ---
    and he's been working furiously.
[05:28] ---
    Could it be for our future together?!
[05:34] ---
    Um, I don't think that's quite right...
[05:37] ---
    No!
[05:38] ---
    I mean, it's good, but I'm
    not ready for it yet!
[05:40] ---
    Um, Nagi, do you happen to have
    some kind of dream for the future?
[05:44] ---
    Well, sure, it's normal to have lots, right?
[05:46] ---
    What?
[05:47] ---
    For example, I intend to become a manga
    author and sell a trillion copies.
[05:52] ---
    So what about it?
[05:53] ---
    Nothing, I just find you too brilliant
    to look upon right now...
[05:56] ---
    Hmm, but I wonder what
    exactly is Hayate's dream.
[06:00] ---
    I have no idea. He was
    stressing it quite a bit,
[06:03] ---
    so he must have a really
    big dream of some sort.
[06:07] ---
    But Nagi, the dream you're
    envisioning right now
[06:10] ---
    is almost certainly not the same
    as the dream Hayate has in mind.
[06:14] ---
    Still, what in the world
    could Hayate's dream be?
[06:19] ---
    What? My dream?
[06:21] ---
    Yes.
[06:22] ---
    B-But that was youthful
    and rash, if you will...
[06:24] ---
    It's a pretty huge dream,
[06:26] ---
    so I'm embarrassed to
    even say it out loud...
[06:28] ---
    Don't worry. I won't laugh or anything.
[06:32] ---
    Well, uh...
[06:34] ---
    What is it?
[06:37] ---
    A 3LDK.
[06:39] ---
    Pardon?
SIGN    Japanese 6 Tatami
SIGN    Western 4.5
[06:42] ---
    A 3LDK!
[06:44] SIGN
    Hamakaze Elementary School
[06:46] ---
    And so, my future dream is...
[06:48] ---
    ...to have a house with three rooms
    in addition to a large space
[06:51] ---
    that serves as a living room,
    dining room, and kitchen,
[06:51] SIGN
    My Future Dream
[06:55] ---
    and to live in this 3LDK in peace,
    without fear of being driven out.
[06:58] ---
    That's enough. You can stop now, Hayate.
[07:00] ---
    The reason for that is...
[07:01] SIGN
    Sense of Respect
[07:04] ---
    I-I see. So your dream is a 3LDK.
[07:09] ---
    What?! D-Do you think that's a bit too big?
[07:12] ---
    I'm totally fine it it's not inside Tokyo.
[07:14] ---
    I think it's good...
[07:16] ---
    Really?!
[07:18] ---
    The bigger the dream the
    more wonderful it is...
[07:23] ---
    Hayate?
[07:24] ---
    Huh? Yes?
[07:25] ---
    That reminds me, your cell
    phone is still broken, right?
[07:29] ---
    It really is inconvenient, so please
    go buy one on the expense account.
[07:32] ---
    Oh, understood. Then I'll go right away.
[07:34] ---
    Oh, also, it's important to
    take a break once in a while,
[07:38] ---
    so please feel free to take
    the rest of the day off.
[07:40] ---
    Why don't you go hang out
    in town for a while?
[07:42] ---
    What?
[07:45] ---
    I took the opportunity to
    buy a really nice one.
[07:48] ---
    Wow, so this is 1seg.
[07:50] ---
    I can even make video calls.
[07:52] ---
    Whoa! I can enter up to 1000
    addresses. That's amazing.
[07:57] ---
    Well, not that I need it. I
    don't have that many friends.
[08:01] ---
    Come to think of it, I wonder how
    everyone's doing back in high school.
[08:05] ---
    School, huh?
[08:07] ---
    I didn't have time for it, so I
    completely neglected to go, but...
[08:11] ---
    If I remember right, I paid for
    the full tuition, didn't I?
[08:15] ---
    What am I thinking?
[08:17] ---
    Could it be that I still...
[08:19] ---
    ...want to go back to school?
[08:22] ---
    All right!
[08:23] SIGN
    Shiomi Municipal High School
[08:29] ---
    I kind of let the moment
    carry me all the way here,
[08:31] ---
    but I'm finding it hard to actually go in...
[08:33] ---
    But I should technically
    still be a student here!
[08:36] ---
    If I just go in boldly...
[08:37] ---
    Um...
[08:38] ---
    I'm sorry! I'm sorry! But I'm by
    no means anyone suspicious...
[08:42] ---
    Is that you, Hayate?
[08:43] ---
    What?
[08:44] ---
    M-Miss Nishizawa?
[08:46] ---
    W-We haven't seen each other since Christmas.
     What are you doing here?
[08:49] ---
    W-Well...
[08:51] ---
    Souya and the others were worried, too,
[08:53] ---
    because you haven't been to school at all.
[08:55] ---
    That is, a lot of things happened
    since the end of last year...
[08:59] ---
    A lot of things?
[09:00] ---
    Hmm, how should I explain this?
[09:02] ---
    For example, my parents suddenly got
    into enormous debt and disappeared.
[09:06] ---
    What?!
[09:07] ---
    And I sort of got gifted to some "very
    generous people" as collateral.
[09:11] ---
    Huh?
SIGN    Father
SIGN    Mother
[09:15] ---
    N-No way, right?
[09:17] ---
    Well, so with all the things that happened,
    I'm working as a butler at a certain mansion now.
[09:22] ---
    What?
[09:23] ---
    O-Oh, come on, is that a joke?
[09:25] ---
    You're awful, Hayate. Really!
[09:27] ---
    But I'm glad.
[09:29] ---
    I finally got to see you for
    the first time this year,
[09:32] ---
    so I'm really happy.
[09:34] ---
    What?
[09:35] ---
    No, i-i-it's nothing. I didn't
    mean anything by that.
[09:39] ---
    What're you doing flirting out here?
[09:40] ---
    S-Souya!
[09:42] ---
    Wait! It's Hayate!
[09:44] ---
    There were rumors that you'd quit school...
[09:46] ---
    Well, it's not like I actually quit...
[09:48] ---
    Oh, I see.
[09:50] ---
    I'm happy for you, Nishizawa. You've
    got your beloved prince back.
[09:56] ---
    Wh-What are you saying? You
    must be an idiot, Souya!
[10:00] ---
    It's only natural to worry
    about a classmate, right?!
[10:03] ---
    F-For all that, you were on the verge
    of tears when you heard he'd quit.
[10:08] ---
    So you were worried about me?
[10:11] ---
    Thank you, Miss Nishizawa.
[10:13] ---
    Y-You're my classmate! Of
    course, I was worried!
[10:16] ---
    But in that case, maybe I'll do
    my best to attend school again.
[10:20] ---
    What're you saying, Ayasaki?
[10:22] ---
    You've been disenrolled.
[10:25] ---
    Do you think it's all right for a
    teacher to utter such a flippant lie?
[10:29] ---
    Don't do this, Nishizawa.
    I merely spoke the truth.
[10:32] ---
    What?
[10:33] ---
    Ayasaki's parents came around
    noon on Christmas Eve
[10:37] ---
    and demanded the rest of the tuition because
    he wouldn't be coming to school anymore!
[10:40] ---
    What?!
[10:41] ---
    Tuition? Didn't you pay it
    out of your own pocket?
[10:45] ---
    Because your parents
    wouldn't pay it for you?
[10:47] ---
    Y-Yes, basically.
[10:48] ---
    But you returned the money and
    disenrolled him? That's too cruel!
[10:51] ---
    No, but his parents...
[10:51] ---
    Ah, I see...
[10:53] ---
    So I can't go to school, after all.
[10:59] ---
    Hayate, where are you going?
[11:01] ---
    Don't tell me you're really going
    to just disappear like this.
[11:03] ---
    You can't do that!
[11:05] ---
    It'll be fine!
[11:06] ---
    If you raise the issue with the board
    of education or something, surely...
[11:09] ---
    If I did that, the teachers will
    end up being held responsible
[11:13] ---
    for my parents' selfish acts.
[11:17] ---
    You don't need to worry about me.
[11:21] ---
    So, this is farewell, Miss Nishizawa.
[11:26] ---
    It was short, but... Farewell,
    my high school years.
[11:30] ---
    Wait, Hayate!
[11:41] ---
    I love you, Hayate!
[11:42] ---
    What?!
[11:44] ---
    I don't want this to be good-bye!
[11:46] ---
    So won't you please go out with me?!
[11:51] ---
    In the moment that she said that,
    I came to a strange realization.
[11:55] ---
    For some reason,
[11:56] ---
    without thinking, her face
    flashed before my mind's eye.
[12:04] ---
    More than anything, I was struck by the
    terribly sad expression on her face.
[12:10] ---
    Won't you please go out with me?
[12:12] ---
    What?! Uh, um...
[12:15] ---
    I'm sorry.
[12:16] ---
    What?!
[12:17] ---
    The truth is...
[12:19] ---
    ...I'm only interested in
    the 2-dimensional world.
SIGN    Crushed!!
[12:24] ---
    That was a joke. But right now,
    there's someone I can't abandon.
[12:29] ---
    Hayate, you jerk!
[12:33] ---
    Being fundamentally bad
    at dealing with girls,
[12:37] ---
    Hayate believed it was more manly to refuse
[12:40] ---
    in a way that would make
    her hate him, but...
[12:42] ---
    The protagonist of a comedic anime
    never gets dumped in a cool way.
[12:48] ---
    I-I have returned.
[12:50] ---
    Ah, Hayate.
[12:51] ---
    What happened to your face?
[12:53] ---
    Oh, it's just a little...
[12:54] ---
    By the way, I heard you bought a cell phone?
[12:57] ---
    What?
[12:57] ---
    Let me see it for a second.
[12:59] ---
    Miss, what are you...?
[13:03] ---
    There!
SIGN    Nagi Sanzenin
[13:05] ---
    Here! I entered myself as the number
    one entry in your address book!
[13:16] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[13:17] ---
    Mhm! E-mail me or call
    me as much as you like!
[13:20] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[13:23] ---
    Hayate, I haven't given up yet!
[13:25] ---
    Lady, you better pay for that.
[13:30] ---
    Soft rice cake with strawberry
[13:34] ---
    A dream of spinning is just...
[13:36] SIGN
    Video Tachibana
[13:38] ---
    Here, Wataru, I finished watching
    this, so I'm returning it.
[13:41] ---
    Okay, so what did you think of it?
[13:42] ---
    Hmm, I guess I'd give it about 60 points.
[13:45] ---
    I told you, didn't I? That it's not
    a film a girl would understand.
[13:48] ---
    Even so, I'm at an age where I'd like
    to learn what boys are thinking!
[13:51] ---
    You can learn what boys are
    thinking through monster films?
[13:54] ---
    But Miss Nishizawa, this person
    you cared for quit school, right?
[13:59] ---
    That's right! His house was gone and
    there were no clues to go on, either!
[14:03] ---
    At the very least, I wanted to see
    him one more time and talk to him...
[14:05] ---
    No way you'll ever find someone who's
    gone missing like that, moron.
[14:09] ---
    Why would you say something
    so depressing, Wataru?!
[14:12] SIGN
    Wataru Only
[14:13] ---
    Oh...
[14:15] ---
    Say, Wataru...
[14:16] ---
    Hm?
[14:17] ---
    I don't usually watch these anime,
    but are they interesting?
[14:21] ---
    Everything on that shelf are shows
    that I thought were interesting,
[14:24] ---
    but I don't know if you'll agree.
[14:26] ---
    What?!
[14:28] ---
    Don't "what" me!
[14:29] ---
    Listen here! Ultimately, whether you
    think it's interesting is subjective!
[14:32] ---
    No matter where you go with this, you won't know
    unless you check it out with your own eyes first!
[14:35] ---
    So quit complaining and watch it first!
[14:38] ---
    Use your head and judge for yourself!
[14:40] ---
    Whether that is something you
    find truly interesting or not!
[14:43] ---
    That's the Coach for you!
[14:45] ---
    But that's rented out right
    now, so start with this.
[14:48] ---
    "Lunar Rabbit Weapon..."
[14:48] ---
    Bamboo!
[14:50] ---
    Damn it! That bamboo seller's
    always interrupting me!
[14:51] ---
    Bamboo poles!
[14:54] ---
    Oh, I just remembered something
    I have to do, so I'm going!
[14:55] ---
    Bamboo!
[14:58] ---
    Damn! She ran!
[14:59] ---
    Let's try to value our
    customers a little more.
[15:02] ---
    Still, do you think it's possible to
    find a missing person in this big city?
[15:06] ---
    He must have been a truly wonderful person.
[15:10] ---
    Wataru, I finished watching
    this, so I'm returning it.
[15:14] ---
    Ah, butler-in-debt, what
    did you think of it?
[15:16] ---
    I found the life lessons it presented
    to be quite informative,
[15:19] ---
    but it seems the Miss
    found it dissatisfactory.
[15:21] ---
    The two keep missing each
    other repeatedly. However...
[15:25] ---
    Oh, shoot!
[15:26] ---
    Kazuki asked me to get a
    video for him, didn't he?
[15:32] ---
    No way! Is that Hayate?!
[15:34] ---
    Meeting him in a place like this!
[15:36] ---
    Could it be we're destined to be together?!
[15:40] ---
    This is no time to be
    getting all sentimental!
[15:42] ---
    I have to go after him!
[15:43] ---
    Hayate! Haya...!
[15:48] ---
    Hayate!
[15:50] ---
    Hayate!
[15:55] ---
    He's fast. There's just no
    way I can catch up with him.
[15:58] ---
    B-But I have to keep up, so I
    don't lose sight of him at least!
[16:02] ---
    Oh, he finally stopped!
[16:05] ---
    Or wait, could it be that he lives here...
[16:09] ---
    Wait. Huh?
[16:11] ---
    Wh-What is this?! It's more
    like a mansion than a house!
[16:14] ---
    What's Hayate doing here?!
[16:16] ---
    Oh, that's right!
[16:17] ---
    Hayate said something about
    being collateral for debt...
[16:21] ---
    Which means, this must
    be a Yakuza residence!
[16:24] ---
    Maybe Hayate's being treated
    in horrible ways in there!
[16:30] ---
    What is this?! What should I do?!
[16:30] ---
    Could we have a word with you in the office?
[16:33] ---
    Pardon? A girl who appears to
    be a suspicious individual?
[16:36] ---
    I thought perhaps she could be
    one of the Miss's acquaintances,
[16:36] ---
    Let me go! Let me go!
[16:39] ---
    so I was hoping to get confirmation.
[16:41] ---
    Tough guys in black! These
    people really are Yakuza!
[16:46] ---
    Nooo!
[16:48] ---
    At this rate, they're going to do things to me
    that will be unsuitable for a younger audience!
[16:52] SIGN
    Shiomi High School
[16:53] ---
    Oh, a public high school bag?
[16:56] ---
    Could that girl be from Hayate's old school?
[16:58] ---
    Let go! Come on, let me go!
[16:59] ---
    Um, she doesn't seem to be suspicious,
    so please let go of her arms.
[17:03] ---
    Yes, ma'am.
[17:03] ---
    Let me go!
[17:04] ---
    Hey, let her arms go for now.
[17:06] ---
    Yes, sir.
[17:07] ---
    She ran away!
[17:08] ---
    I'm outta here!
[17:10] ---
    Um, I didn't tell you to let her get away...
[17:13] ---
    My apologies. We will catch her right away.
[17:22] ---
    I managed to escape somehow,
[17:24] ---
    but I have absolutely no
    idea where Hayate might be.
[17:28] ---
    But the Yakuza sure are impressive.
[17:31] ---
    I bet Wataru wouldn't believe me even if I
    told him that they have a great mansion like this.
[17:36] ---
    Anyway, I have to find Hayate
    quickly and escape with him!
[17:42] ---
    Huh?
[17:43] ---
    Comedic depiction.
[17:46] ---
    Realistic depiction.
[17:49] ---
    Why?! Why is there a tiger
    at a Japanese residence?!
[17:53] ---
    I'm seriously going to die at this rate!
[17:55] ---
    And it's chasing after me, too!
[17:57] ---
    Why am I chasing after that girl?!
[17:59] ---
    Is this the hunting instinct
    that I thought I'd lost?!
[18:03] ---
    Yikes!
[18:04] ---
    In that case, I'll follow that instinct
[18:06] ---
    and take this girl...
[18:09] ---
    ...and lick her all over!
[18:11] ---
    You! That's a different kind of instinct!
[18:13] ---
    Hayate!
[18:16] ---
    Lightning Kick!
[18:21] ---
    Lightning Kick!
[18:23] ---
    It is a lethal technique
    that can only be mastered
[18:25] ---
    by those who have overcome adversity
    with hard work and determination!
[18:28] ---
    Um, I haven't had any special
    training or anything.
[18:34] ---
    Honestly! Causing nothing but
    trouble, the same as ever.
[18:38] ---
    Shoot. I'm being influenced by the
    DVDs I've borrowed from Wataru.
[18:42] ---
    That technique name just slipped out.
[18:43] ---
    This isn't what I meant when I talked
    about instructive life lessons...
[18:46] ---
    Hayate!
[18:48] ---
    Oh? Miss Nishizawa?
[18:50] ---
    I-I'm so glad! It is you!
[18:52] ---
    Come on, let's hurry up and
    escape from this place.
[18:54] ---
    Huh? What do you mean by that?
[18:57] ---
    Hey, Hayate.
[18:59] ---
    What have you been doing?
[19:01] ---
    Oh, Miss!
[19:05] ---
    There is something that can
    be determined at a glance.
[19:08] ---
    Hayate, who is this girl?
[19:11] ---
    Oh, this is Miss Nishizawa and
    she used to be my classmate.
[19:15] ---
    Hayate, who is this little girl?
[19:17] ---
    Oh, this is Miss Nagi and
    she's this estate's...
[19:27] ---
    That is a woman's intuition that
    even the youngest girls have.
[19:30] ---
    Her destined opponent, with whom she
    would fight over one precious thing...
[19:34] ---
    One look, and they each
    recognized it instantly.
[19:37] ---
    That they were rivals!
[19:52] ---
    Wait! My backer's a hamster?!
[19:55] ---
    Oh, it got eaten! So weak!
    My hamster's so weak!
[19:58] ---
    Y-You leave me no choice.
[20:00] ---
    I'll back down for today,
[20:02] ---
    but next time, I'll bring a
    stronger hamster with me!
[20:05] ---
    Wait for me, Hayate!
[20:07] ---
    Oh, Miss Nishizawa!
[20:11] ---
    Still the same old funny
    person, that Miss Nishizawa.
[20:14] ---
    You can't, okay?
[20:15] ---
    What?
[20:17] ---
    You can't, okay? You can't leave
    me and go somewhere else.
[20:25] ---
    You have nothing to worry about.
[20:26] ---
    There is nowhere else for
    me to go except here.
[20:48] ---
    There are some who can't go to school
    anymore, even if they want to, so...
[21:14] ---
    Um, Nagi...?
[21:16] ---
    I've decided!
[21:17] ---
    What?
[21:20] ---
    Hayate has been good to me in so many ways.
[21:22] ---
    As his mistress, I must repay his devotion!
[21:26] ---
    Miss Nagi has made up her
    mind about something.
[21:29] ---
    Next time, he will be fighting
    the giant campus once again.
[21:32] ---
    In the meantime, aside from that...
[21:34] ---
    I'm going to rent these for now!
[21:36] ---
    Hey, thanks for your business!
[21:38] ---
    Keeping busy!
[21:40] ---
    Hey! "Cup-and-Ball and Carrot" is out!
[21:44] ---
    Yes, it got rented out just earlier.
[21:46] ---
    Andarta!
[21:47] ---
    Wataru's video store is
    getting a lot of business.
[21:50] ---
    Also currently offering 50% off rentals!
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:03] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:03] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:13] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:13] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:19] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:19] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:23] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:23] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:29] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:29] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:34] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:34] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:40] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:40] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:45] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:45] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:50] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:50] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:00] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:00] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:06] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:06] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:15] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:15] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    Hello, Hayate Ayasaki here.
[23:32] ---
    I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:34] ---
    Starting today,
[23:35] ---
    we'll be doing this segment with
    the Miss's song in the background.
[23:38] ---
    Yes. As the Sanzenin family heir, the
    ability to sing is an important factor.
[23:42] ---
    It fully reflects how you are a spoiled,
    unmanageable bundle of energy.
[23:46] ---
    A true masterpiece!
[23:47] ---
    What's this? Was that
    intended as a compliment?
[23:49] ---
    Yes, of course!
[23:50] ---
    The song vibrantly conveys how
    cute you are, if you will!
[23:53] ---
    Cute?! Please!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] SIGN
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Miss, some documents have
    arrived from Hakuou Academy...
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    The transfer application, right? For you?
[24:02] ---
    Oh, for me.
[24:03] ---
    Wait! What do you mean, for me?!
[24:05] ---
    They're transfer documents for you.
[24:07] ---
    And now, I shall relate the story
    of my entrance exam experience.
[24:10] ---
    I'll tell you the Hakuou entrance exam
    trends and how to deal with them.
[24:13] ---
    No, thank you.
[24:15] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:17] ---
    "I Hear That Those Who Rule the
    Summer Rule at Entrance Exams".
[24:19] SIGN
    I Hear That Those Who Rule the
    Summer Rule at Entrance Exams
[24:19] ---
    I saw the promise in you.
[24:21] ---
    So let's go to school together!
[24:23] ---
    Run up to that arena of your dreams!

13 - I Hear That Those Whole Rule the Summer Rule at Entrance Exams

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright and
    sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:13] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:16] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[00:19] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[00:23] ---
    Yes!
[00:24] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[00:28] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[00:32] ---
    Ladies and gentlemen,
[00:33] ---
    thank you for watching "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" again today!
[00:36] ---
    Now, let us sing the theme song together!
[00:39] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[00:39] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[00:45] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[00:45] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[00:52] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[00:52] ---
    Giving in to fate
[00:55] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[00:55] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:00] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:00] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:04] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:04] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:08] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:08] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:13] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:13] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:16] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:16] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[01:23] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[01:23] ---
    Just let it take you
[01:30] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[01:30] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[01:33] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[01:33] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[01:36] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[01:36] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[01:42] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[01:42] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[01:49] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[01:49] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:07] SIGN
    I Hear That Those Who Rule the
    Summer Rule at Entrance Exams
[02:27] ---
    I wonder what Miss Nishizawa's
    doing right now.
[02:48] ---
    One family sort of group...
[03:02] ---
    Five to six customers...
[03:15] ---
    Two couples...
[03:29] ---
    One old man...
[03:42] ---
    Full house...
[03:56] ---
    No customers...
[03:59] ---
    Welcome.
[04:00] ---
    Let me see...
[04:02] ---
    Anmitsu with ice cream, egg-drop
    New Year's soup, tokoroten jelly,
[04:06] ---
    kudzu mochi, Abekawa mochi,
    isobe-yaki rice cakes,
[04:08] ---
    country style zenzai, and a cream soda.
[04:11] ---
    I'd like all those things, please.
[04:13] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am.
[04:17] ---
    I wonder what Hayate's doing right now.
[04:40] ---
    Come to think of it, I wonder what
    Miss Nishizawa was doing here.
[04:44] ---
    ...and take this girl...
[04:46] ---
    ...and lick her all over!
[04:49] ---
    Hayate!
[04:51] ---
    Lightning Kick!
[04:59] ---
    Oh? Miss Nishizawa?
[05:00] ---
    I-I'm so glad! It is you!
[05:04] ---
    And the commotion with the
    Miss on top of that...
[05:21] ---
    The Miss...
[05:23] ---
    and Miss Nishizawa...
[05:29] ---
    A delivery for you.
[05:30] ---
    Thank you very much.
SIGN    Hakuou Private Academy
SIGN    Miss Nagi Sanzenin
[05:39] ---
    Still, I feel bad about doing
    that to Miss Nishizawa...
[05:52] ---
    I love you, Hayate!
[05:54] ---
    What?!
[05:55] ---
    I don't want this to be good-bye!
[05:58] ---
    So won't you please go out with me?!
[06:02] ---
    But right now, I have no business
    going out with a girl anyway.
[06:06] ---
    What?! Uh, um...
[06:09] ---
    I'm sorry.
[06:10] ---
    What?!
[06:11] ---
    The truth is...
[06:13] ---
    ...I'm only interested
    in 2-dimensional things.
SIGN    Crushed!!
[06:18] ---
    There must have been a better
    way to turn her down...
[06:23] ---
    Hayate, you jerk!
[06:29] ---
    But I have no idea what I should
    do in situations like that.
[06:34] ---
    But why did I think of
    the Miss right then...?
[06:43] ---
    Is that you, Hayate?
[06:44] ---
    Yes.
[06:46] ---
    Miss, a delivery has arrived for you...
[06:50] ---
    Oh, thanks. Go ahead and open it for me.
[06:55] ---
    Miss.
[06:57] ---
    You are technically a girl,
    so please don't read like that.
[07:03] ---
    R-Right...
[07:05] ---
    I bet this is how it feels to be a big
    brother worried about his kid sister.
[07:09] ---
    It'll be a long time before I
    have time for a girlfriend.
[07:11] ---
    I have my hands full with the Miss already.
[07:14] ---
    By the way, what is this?
[07:16] ---
    It looks to be some documents
    from Hakuou Academy...
[07:19] ---
    Oh, the transfer application,
    right? For you?
[07:23] ---
    Oh, for me.
[07:27] ---
    Wait! What do you mean, for me?!
[07:29] ---
    They're documents for you
    to transfer into Hakuou.
[07:32] ---
    No, no, I haven't heard about this.
     This is news to me!
[07:35] ---
    And I'm delivering the news!
[07:37] ---
    B-But I was dismissed from my old school!
[07:40] ---
    I already know that.
[07:42] ---
    What?
[07:44] ---
    Because I sent for documents
    from that school, too.
[07:47] ---
    Oh, look. Here they are.
[07:50] ---
    B-But what about the tuition?!
[07:53] ---
    I don't have those kind of financial means.
[07:56] ---
    What are you saying?
[07:58] ---
    I'm paying for it, of course.
[08:00] ---
    B-But...!
[08:03] ---
    Honestly! What's the problem?!
[08:06] ---
    Don't you want to go to school with me?!
[08:11] ---
    Besides, this is sort of
    my way of thanking you,
[08:15] ---
    so don't worry about it.
[08:18] ---
    I'll get to go back... to school...
[08:21] ---
    Miss... Thank y...
[08:23] ---
    Whoa! What are you crying for?!
[08:25] ---
    Because... Because...
[08:28] ---
    What did you do to make him cry?
[08:30] ---
    No, no! I didn't make him cry!
    Hayate just started on his own!
[08:42] ---
    According to this document,
[08:44] ---
    it seems you'll still have to
    take a transfer admission test.
[08:48] ---
    Well, if he is to claim
    to be a Sanzenin butler,
[08:52] ---
    he had better be able to pass a mere
    transfer admission test from Hakuou.
[08:56] ---
    Oh, my, Mr. Klaus!
[08:57] ---
    You're alive!
[08:59] ---
    Please don't go killing
    me off so thoughtlessly.
[09:02] ---
    So, well... If he doesn't pass,
    let's just say he'll be fired.
[09:06] ---
    Hey! After all this time?!
[09:08] ---
    That's fine.
[09:12] ---
    If I don't pass after everything
    you've done for me,
[09:15] ---
    it would be inexcusable!
    As a butler and as a man!
[09:19] ---
    So I shall put it on display for all of you!
[09:21] ---
    My... My most earnest effort!
[09:24] ---
    Incidentally, Hakuou Academy requires
    a standard score of over 65.
[09:30] ---
    I...
[09:32] ---
    I will be fine!
[09:33] ---
    Fine!
[09:34] ---
    Incidentally, the transfer
    admission test is tomorrow.
[09:38] ---
    A f-fart in a windstorm
    is not necessary, Miss.
[09:43] ---
    But I wonder if Hayate
    really will be all right.
[09:46] ---
    Considering his grades at his last school,
[09:49] ---
    it's honestly going to be tight.
[09:57] ---
    Where's Hayate?
[09:59] ---
    He's studying.
[10:02] ---
    I see.
[10:13] ---
    Come in.
[10:17] ---
    How is it going?
[10:19] ---
    Well, it's coming along.
[10:21] ---
    Please try not to let your
    nerves get the better of you.
[10:25] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[10:33] ---
    I'll listen to Maria's advice
    and leave it at that.
[10:44] ---
    H-Head Butler!
[10:46] ---
    Please wake up! Please
    wake up! This is my bed!
[10:53] ---
    Good morning.
[10:56] ---
    It is not morning yet!
[10:58] ---
    Please leave!
[11:00] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, you misunderstand me.
[11:04] ---
    What?
[11:06] ---
    I, too, want you to be
    admitted to Hakuou Academy.
[11:10] ---
    I want you to pass tomorrow's
    transfer admission test!
[11:14] ---
    Do you really mean that?
[11:15] ---
    Do these eyes look like those of a liar's?
[11:20] ---
    You're scaring me.
[11:23] ---
    Sorry.
[11:24] ---
    If you have my best interests at heart,
[11:26] ---
    please leave and let me sleep.
[11:28] ---
    I have your best interests at heart
[11:30] ---
    and that's why I came to relate the
    story of my entrance exam experience!
[11:33] ---
    No, thank you!
[11:35] ---
    Yes, thank you!
[11:37] ---
    You're being unreasonable!
[11:39] ---
    Oh, really! This is not necessary!
[11:39] ---
    This was back when I applied to enter
    a prestigious private kindergarten.
[11:43] ---
    Aw, he's started already.
[11:47] ---
    There was a problem I just couldn't solve.
[11:51] ---
    The end of the test period
    was fast approaching.
[11:54] ---
    Even then, as young as I
    was, I could not solve it.
[11:59] ---
    But just as my time was about to be up...
[12:12] ---
    Klaus, you passed.
[12:14] ---
    Are you trying to say that one
    mustn't give up, no matter what?
[12:27] ---
    Head Butler!
[12:31] ---
    Mr. Klaus!
[12:35] ---
    Get out!
[12:41] ---
    My rare appearance has me feeling shy.
[12:45] ---
    Deluxe animation! Tama's house!
[12:57] ---
    Sine, cosine, tangent.
[13:00] ---
    The test's probably going to
    cover some of that stuff.
[13:02] ---
    That voice!
[13:04] ---
    Tama! How'd you get in here?!
[13:08] ---
    I thought I'd tell you the
    Hakuou entrance exam trends
[13:11] ---
    and teach you how to deal with them.
[13:15] ---
    I don't want to learn anything from you!
[13:20] ---
    Beat it!
[13:29] ---
    That should do it.
[13:46] ---
    Hayate! Hayate!
[13:49] ---
    It's not morning yet, so you've
    got plenty of time to sleep.
[14:02] SIGN
    Hakuou Academy
[14:10] ---
    Are you okay?
[14:13] ---
    I'm just a little short on sleep.
[14:21] ---
    A streetcar?
[14:23] ---
    The campus is big, after all.
[14:33] ---
    Well, I did everything I could, but...
[14:37] ---
    I wonder what kind of test it's going to be.
[14:40] ---
    Probably pretty normal,
    like English and stuff.
[14:43] ---
    I don't think that study guide will
    help you pass at all, though.
[14:51] ---
    You think Hakuou Academy's
    transfer admission test
[14:53] ---
    would be something so normal?!
[14:57] ---
    Little Nagi?
[15:01] ---
    Good of you to come,
    ex-suspicious individual!
[15:03] ---
    And Little Nagi!
[15:05] ---
    I'm your test administrator for today!
[15:07] ---
    The beautiful world history
    teacher, Yukiji Katsura!
[15:12] ---
    The b-beautiful?
[15:14] ---
    Don't turn that into a question!
[15:17] ---
    You say it's not normal, Miss Katsura?
[15:19] ---
    But I took a normal test to get in.
[15:25] ---
    Keep looking back at the past
[15:26] ---
    and you'll have nothing to gain
    from the future, Little Nagi!
[15:29] ---
    I don't know about the wisdom
    of only looking ahead, either.
[15:32] ---
    At any rate!
[15:33] ---
    We're going to begin the transfer
    admission test, so come with me!
[15:37] ---
    Your assignment is none other than
    a Redmond-style interview exam!
[15:43] ---
    A Redmond-style interview exam refers to...
[15:46] ---
    a test that has been rapidly adopted
    by businesses in recent years,
[15:50] ---
    which uses logic questions to test
    the true intelligence of applicants.
[15:54] ---
    "Why are manhole covers round?"
[15:57] ---
    Such tough brainteasers must
    be answered logically,
[16:00] ---
    and the test is used to judge
    fundamental intelligence
[16:02] ---
    in a way that does not
    rely on memorized facts.
[16:06] ---
    I see. Hakuou Academy's
    prestige isn't for nothing.
[16:09] ---
    Even their transfer admission
    test is a bit different.
[16:11] ---
    By the way, why do you suppose
    manhole covers are round?
[16:15] ---
    Because if it were square, the slightest
    shift would cause it to fall in, right?
[16:21] ---
    Since the diagonal length of a
    square is longer than its sides.
[16:25] ---
    On a circle, it's the same,
    even if it shifts, so...
[16:32] ---
    Ah! You're very smart, Miss!
[16:35] ---
    Of course.
[16:36] ---
    I'm not attending Hakuou
    on a whim or for show.
[16:43] ---
    All right, then we'll begin the test.
[16:47] ---
    It'll be taking place inside the classroom.
[16:49] ---
    The test will begin the moment you enter
[16:52] ---
    and everything you say and do
    will be subject to scoring!
[16:56] ---
    Bear that in mind in
    tackling this challenge!
[17:01] ---
    And now, your first problem...
[17:04] ---
    ...is this!
SIGN    SNAP
[17:15] SIGN
    CRAAAAASH
[17:17] ---
    Are you mocking our Hayate?!
[17:17] SIGN
    Can't show you!
[17:20] ---
    Or are you permitted to do whatever
    you please because you're a teacher?!
[17:24] ---
    Little Nagi, your jabs are harsh.
[17:28] ---
    However, this is the
    prestigious Hakuou Academy!
[17:32] ---
    And this is a Redmond-style interview
    exam to test your true intelligence!
[17:38] ---
    If you want to give the answer that
    just occurred to you, feel free.
[17:42] ---
    But do you really think
    that's the correct answer?
[17:46] ---
    Yes, it's true.
    By the normal way of thinking,
[17:49] ---
    you use a tool to get the banana.
[17:52] ---
    It's an intelligence test for monkeys.
[17:54] ---
    However, in Redmond-style interview exams,
[17:57] ---
    the first answer that occurs
    to you is usually wrong.
[18:00] ---
    In which case...
[18:03] ---
    I have it.
[18:06] ---
    The key to this problem is none other than
[18:08] ---
    the height at which the banana is hung.
[18:12] ---
    The banana is actually at a height
    that you can reach by hand.
[18:17] ---
    So the tools lying around
    are all red herrings.
[18:23] ---
    The correct answer is none other than
[18:25] ---
    "grab it with your hand
    without using any tools"!
[18:27] ---
    This is the correct answer.
[18:38] SIGN
    Growl~
[18:39] ---
    Monkeys enduring hunger,
    unable to cleverly reach the food.
[18:44] ---
    The only food around.
[18:47] ---
    Oh, damn it!
[18:49] ---
    So that was the catch.
[18:51] ---
    I see.
[18:53] ---
    Which means, after everything
    I went through,
[18:55] ---
    it's been a while, but I'm going
    to get all bloody in this episode?
[19:00] ---
    But you know...
[19:03] ---
    If I don't win this fight, I won't...
[19:06] ---
    ...get to go to school!
[19:18] ---
    Here I come!
[19:21] ---
    I didn't imagine he would choose
    to fight instead of fleeing.
[19:24] ---
    More like, this is animal abuse.
[19:29] ---
    But your butler sure is putting up a fight.
[19:32] ---
    Well, he's got a lot riding
    on this test, after all.
[19:35] ---
    I see.
[19:42] ---
    Then, shall we cut the joke
    short and get on with the test?
[19:45] ---
    What?! This was a joke?!
[19:49] ---
    Well, yeah. It'd be easy if you could
    test for intelligence like this.
[19:53] ---
    Then why did you make me do this?!
[19:55] ---
    I sort of wanted to loosen you up
    as thanks for what you did for me.
[20:00] ---
    I don't need this sort of thanks!
[20:03] ---
    Thus, in pretty poor condition,
    both mentally and physically,
[20:08] ---
    Hayate tackled the test.
[20:11] ---
    Calm down!
[20:12] ---
    Just calm down!
[20:19] ---
    How did it go?
[20:20] ---
    Well, I managed to answer all
    the questions somehow, but...
[20:23] ---
    If I don't pass after everything
    you've done for me...
[20:27] ---
    What shall I do, Miss?
[20:30] ---
    What kind of discouraging
    comment is that now?
[20:34] ---
    You're certain to have passed.
[20:37] ---
    I saw the promise in you.
[20:39] ---
    So let's go to school together!
[20:45] ---
    You're right, Miss.
[20:54] ---
    Huh? Madam Superintendent...
[20:56] SIGN
    Superintendent's Office
[20:57] ---
    I'm to deliver this notice
    to the Sanzenin residence?
[21:02] ---
    But Madam Superintendent...
[21:05] SIGN
    Not Accepted
[21:05] ---
    Perhaps this is my imagination,
[21:07] ---
    but I feel like there is
    one word too many here...
[21:11] ---
    Well, he fell short of a
    passing mark by one point.
[21:16] ---
    It's too bad.
[21:18] ---
    I-I see...
[21:21] ---
    If he had taken the test
    in a calmer frame of mind,
[21:23] ---
    maybe he would have passed...
[21:26] ---
    It's really too bad.
[21:29] ---
    So, there you have it.
[21:31] ---
    I will be counting on you
    to do this, Miss Katsura.
[21:37] ---
    In the meantime, at the Sanzenin
    residence, not knowing this...
[21:41] ---
    We're getting ahead of ourselves, but
    shall we celebrate your acceptance?
[21:44] ---
    What?! Really?! I'm so happy!
[21:47] ---
    ...they were already plunging
    into celebration mode.
[21:52] ---
    If my dreams have taken your heart
[21:52] ---
    Moshi boku no yume ga kimi no kokoro
[21:58] ---
    Kizutsuke-tetara
[21:58] ---
    And brought it pain
[22:03] ---
    Sono omoi wa itsuka
[22:03] ---
    Someday, that anguish
[22:08] ---
    Boku ga morau yo
[22:08] ---
    I will take from you
[22:13] ---
    Taisetsu na mono ni furue-nagara
[22:13] ---
    While trembling over something precious
[22:19] ---
    Kakezuri-mawatte
[22:19] ---
    And madly dashing about
[22:24] ---
    Seou itami ni hibi wa
[22:24] ---
    The hurt I bore made the days
[22:29] ---
    Muimi ni sugita
[22:29] ---
    Go by emptily
[22:34] ---
    Oikaketa mama de oikosare-tsuzuke
[22:34] ---
    Just chasing and continually being overtaken
[22:40] ---
    Tohou ni kureru kaze
[22:40] ---
    A wind who's lost its bearing
[22:45] ---
    Kimi no doko ni furetara
[22:45] ---
    What part of you should I touch
[22:50] ---
    Ii ka o sagashita
[22:50] ---
    I sought it out
[22:55] ---
    Mamoritai yo kimi dake wa tsuyoku
[22:55] ---
    You alone, I want to protect so much
[23:00] ---
    Yokubou no wadachi kara touzakatte
[23:00] ---
    Getting away from the rut of desire
[23:06] ---
    Itsuka subete te ni ireru sore ga
[23:06] ---
    Someday, it will all be ours and that
[23:10] ---
    Kimi to boku no Proof
[23:10] ---
    Is our proof, yours and mine
[23:15] ---
    Namida mo zenbu azukeru yo
[23:15] ---
    Even all my tears, I entrust to you
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    Hayate, did you have fun studying
    for the entrance exam?
[23:33] ---
    Yes, it had been a while since I got
    to enjoy feeling like a student.
[23:36] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[23:38] ---
    Thanks is not necessary, Hayate.
[23:39] ---
    We'll be able to go to school
    together every day now.
[23:42] ---
    What?! Well, I suppose so.
[23:44] ---
    This will be good-bye to days of
    all-nighters and internet gaming.
[23:48] ---
    That's not good.
[23:49] ---
    What?!
[23:50] ---
    All right! You're going to skip
    school with me from now on!
[23:53] ---
    What?!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] SIGN
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    It was just a tiny prank! It
    was meant to be a little joke!
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    I never imagined he would fall short
    of passing by just one point!
[24:03] ---
    So, you want me to come
    with you to apologize?
[24:05] ---
    Yes, if you please, that is
    exactly what I am asking!
[24:07] ---
    We will be holding a
    magnificent party today!
[24:10] ---
    And we owe it all to that boy
    gaining acceptance into Hakuou!
[24:14] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:15] ---
    "Hey, hey! I hafta go to a party.
    Hurry up, seriously".
[24:19] ---
    This situation makes bringing up the
    subject even harder than I expected.
[24:19] SIGN
    Hey, hey! I hafta go to a party.
    Hurry up, seriously
[24:22] ---
    Absolute destiny: Apocalypse.

14 - Hey, hey! I hafta go to a party. Hurry up, seriously

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright and
    sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:12] SIGN
    Sanzenin
[00:19] ---
    What? A party to celebrate my
    acceptance into Hakuou Academy?
[00:25] ---
    That's right! Quite the brilliant
    idea, don't you think?
[00:30] ---
    Well, it's not official yet,
[00:33] ---
    so I feel like we're getting
    ahead of ourselves.
[00:35] ---
    Oh, you have nothing to worry about!
    You're bound to have been accepted!
[00:39] ---
    Well, to be honest...
[00:41] ---
    I'm actually feeling a bit
    confident about it, too.
[00:46] ---
    I was disturbed in this way...
[00:49] ---
    ...and that way.
[00:53] ---
    The teacher administering the
    test played games with me...
[00:58] ---
    And in the end, even the monkeys
    had their fun with me...
[01:01] ---
    I won't... get to go to school!
[01:10] ---
    Even so, I put forth my
    absolute best effort!
[01:15] ---
    Yes, that's right!
[01:17] ---
    All right! Go!
[01:22] ---
    Yes!
[01:24] ---
    In addition, I was lucky that all
    the questions were multiple choice.
[01:28] ---
    I'm really good at that "pick
    one out of three" thing.
[01:32] ---
    There, that's the one!
[01:34] ---
    Whoa! You idiot!
[01:43] ---
    Of all the boxes, why
    did you open that one?!
[01:44] ---
    Pardon me! Pardon me, Miss!
[01:46] ---
    Hey, you! Stop right there!
[01:48] ---
    You hardly seem good at
    three-choice questions...
[01:52] ---
    Yes, if Hayate had
    dispassionately acknowledged
[01:55] ---
    how unlucky he is at this point,
[01:57] ---
    he may have avoided the comedy,
    I mean, tragedy in this episode,
[02:01] ---
    but then again, maybe not.
[02:04] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[02:07] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[02:10] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[02:13] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[02:17] ---
    Yes!
[02:18] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[02:22] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[02:26] ---
    At minus 40 degrees Celsius,
    you can hammer nails with a banana!
[02:29] ---
    What are you saying, Sis?
[02:30] ---
    Man, I wanna eat perilla pickled eggplants.
[02:33] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[02:33] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:39] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:39] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:46] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:46] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:49] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:49] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:54] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:54] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:58] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:58] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[03:02] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[03:02] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[03:07] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[03:07] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[03:11] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[03:11] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[03:17] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[03:17] ---
    Just let it take you
[03:24] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[03:24] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[03:27] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[03:27] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[03:30] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[03:30] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:36] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:36] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:43] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:43] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[04:02] SIGN
    Hey, hey! I hafta go to a party.
     Hurry up, seriously
[04:09] ---
    HINA!
[04:12] ---
    Hina! There's big trouble!
[04:14] ---
    It's turned into a huge mess!
[04:24] ---
    I've told you to knock before
    coming into my room, haven't I?!
SIGN    Don't make us show this!
[04:27] ---
    I apologize. Really, I'm sorry.
[04:29] ---
    Listen Sis, knocking is
    mankind's greatest invention!
[04:33] ---
    The next time you forget,
[04:35] ---
    I'm going to beat you for real.
[04:37] ---
    For real...
[04:38] ---
    Oh, Yuki dear.
[04:41] ---
    I didn't know you were home.
[04:43] ---
    I'm back, Mom.
[04:45] ---
    If only you'd called.
[04:47] ---
    Are you handling living
    on your own all right?
[04:49] ---
    I'm fine! Have faith in your daughter!
[04:52] ---
    I'm not lavishing my
    money on male companions
[04:54] ---
    nor have I fallen for me-me
    cons or phishing e-mails!
[04:56] ---
    But I wish you'd let me see the
    place you're living in just once...
[04:59] ---
    I'm having an important conversation
    with Hina right now!
[05:02] ---
    What?
[05:03] ---
    Could you just bring up milk tea
    and some kind of Japanese sweets?
[05:06] ---
    What?
[05:07] ---
    On the double! Hurry!
[05:09] ---
    Uh, all right.
[05:10] ---
    Sis!
[05:11] ---
    Oh!
[05:12] ---
    Make it sweet! Make the milk tea sweet!
[05:15] ---
    Three sugars, okay?!
[05:16] ---
    You really do whatever you
    feel like, don't you?
[05:20] ---
    Yum! Bean jam pancakes really are the best!
[05:24] ---
    I bet you'd get along with the
    cat-type robot from the future.
[05:29] ---
    I'm a happy girl!
[05:31] ---
    So? Didn't you come here to
    talk to me about something?
[05:34] ---
    Daf wighf! Dere's bif,
    bif, bif, pwouble, Hina!
[05:38] ---
    Talk or eat! Pick one!
[05:42] ---
    The Sanzenin butler actually came to
    take the transfer admission test!
[05:47] ---
    Wow, I didn't know.
[05:49] ---
    Good for Hayate.
    Hakuou's admission tests are hard.
[05:53] ---
    But as Nagi's butler, I'd assume
    failure wasn't an option.
[05:58] ---
    I imagine he must have put
    some serious effort into it.
[06:00] ---
    Maybe...?
[06:02] ---
    Don't you get in his way, Sis.
[06:03] ---
    Uh-oh!
[06:04] ---
    "Uh-oh"?
[06:05] ---
    Sis, don't tell me...
[06:07] ---
    Th-That's not it!
[06:08] ---
    It was just a tiny prank!
    It was meant to be a little joke!
[06:12] ---
    I never imagined he would fall short
    of passing by just one point!
[06:22] ---
    Stop breathing like that!
    You're spreading the Dark Side!
[06:26] ---
    What are you doing, going around
    ruining other people's lives?!
[06:31] ---
    So basically, his not passing
    is largely due to your prank
[06:35] ---
    and the superintendent has ordered
    you to notify him of the results,
[06:38] ---
    and that's why you've
    come to me. Is that it?
[06:40] ---
    Yes, if you please, that is exactly it.
[06:44] ---
    You're hopeless.
[06:46] ---
    For starters, about the only person
    we can discuss this with is...
[06:49] ---
    Pardon? Not accepted?
[06:51] ---
    Yes, so we'd like to deliver the
    news and apologize in person.
[06:55] ---
    We're on our way right now.
[06:57] ---
    Yes, I'd appreciate that.
[07:00] ---
    I-I'm so vewy sowwie!
[07:01] ---
    I'll have you know,
    I'm not coming with you for your sake!
[07:06] ---
    It is only proper that the Hakuou
    Academy student body president
[07:08] ---
    should undertake this task.
[07:10] ---
    Yes, that's my little sister!
[07:11] ---
    Make sure you apologize to Hayate
    properly and sincerely, got it?
[07:16] ---
    Y-Yeah, I'll do my best.
[07:19] ---
    I'd suspected that something
    like this might happen, but...
[07:23] ---
    Still, this has me at a loss...
[07:26] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[07:27] ---
    Stop resisting and wear the
    outfit that I tell you to!
[07:29] ---
    You're the party's guest of honor!
[07:31] ---
    I'm fine with what I'm wearing now!
[07:33] ---
    What are you saying?!
    Hurry up and get changed!
[07:35] ---
    But the outfit of your choice
    is bound to be a sailor uniform
[07:39] ---
    or something with animal ears!
[07:41] ---
    No, wrong! I've got this for tonight!
[07:44] ---
    I'd rather die!
[07:46] ---
    Why?!
[07:46] ---
    I feel like with this atmosphere,
    it's too late to be revealing the truth...
[07:50] ---
    Oh, what should I do?
    What should I do? What should I do?
[07:53] ---
    What should I do? What should I do?
    What should I do? What should I do?
[07:56] ---
    Hey! Calm down!
[07:59] ---
    Welcome, you two.
[08:00] ---
    Oh, g-good evening!
[08:03] ---
    H-Here! It's Andromeda cake from Okadaya!
[08:05] ---
    It's too soon for that!
[08:07] ---
    I had trouble deciding between this
    and the turtle bread from Pantasia!
[08:10] ---
    W-Well, why don't you at least come in?
[08:14] ---
    Um, so where's Hayate?
[08:17] ---
    Uh, the thing is...
[08:37] ---
    M-Maria?
SIGN    Congratulations to Miss Nagi's
    Butler, Hayate Ayasaki
SIGN    Hakuou Academy Acceptance Commemoration Party
[08:40] ---
    What... in the world...?
[08:43] ---
    Well...
[08:46] ---
    Oh, Mr. Klaus.
[08:48] ---
    Without an occasion such as this,
[08:50] ---
    the Miss could never be persuaded
    to host a social event, so...
[08:53] ---
    Since she showed the slightest
    interest in doing so today,
[08:55] ---
    we are holding a magnificent party
    to make up for how rare these are.
[08:58] ---
    So that's what's going on...
[09:00] ---
    And we owe it all to that boy
    gaining acceptance into Hakuou!
[09:03] ---
    I cannot tell you how
    troublesome he has been,
[09:06] ---
    but he has finally done something
    of service to the Miss.
[09:10] ---
    Where do you think you're going, Sis?!
[09:12] ---
    Something urgent came up...
[09:13] ---
    I'm not letting you run away!
[09:27] ---
    He loves me. He loves me not.
[09:29] ---
    He loves me. He loves me not.
    He loves me. He loves me not.
[09:32] ---
    He loves me. He loves me not.
[09:35] ---
    Darn it, this is too much trouble!
[09:39] ---
    In the language of flowers,
    corn stands for trust!
[09:41] ---
    Hayate and I are...!
[09:48] ---
    They're dancing...
[09:50] ---
    Yes...
[09:51] ---
    Truly, it's almost embarrassing
    how merry they are.
[09:54] ---
    It must have made him really
    happy that he passed.
[09:59] ---
    It is wholly the result of the
    thorough instruction I gave the boy
[10:01] ---
    regarding taking entrance exams.
[10:04] ---
    Besides, I also lit a fire under him,
    that he'd be fired if he didn't pass!
[10:10] ---
    Oh? Is something the matter?
[10:12] ---
    N-No, my chronic peritonitis has caused
    neuralgia, turning into a hordeolum...
[10:16] ---
    So please don't mind me at all.
[10:21] ---
    I swear! Damn that Klaus!
[10:24] ---
    What I really wanted was a cosplay
    party with just the two of us.
[10:27] ---
    Now, now.
[10:28] ---
    If it weren't a celebration for you,
    I'd have skipped out long ago.
[10:32] ---
    But Miss, you look quite
    fabulous in that dress.
[10:36] ---
    What?
[10:37] ---
    You outshine every last one
    of the other guests here!
[10:41] ---
    Y-You dummy! You're the star of the night!
[10:45] ---
    Please!
[10:46] ---
    But it makes me happy to hear it.
     Thank you very much, Miss.
[10:49] ---
    Well, if you're happy,
    I suppose I'll let it go.
[10:52] ---
    Yes.
[10:55] ---
    This situation makes bringing up the
    subject even harder than I expected.
[10:58] ---
    Given that,
[11:00] ---
    please enjoy this merriment
    for a while longer.
[11:07] ---
    Shish kebabs!
[11:08] ---
    Roger that!
[11:10] ---
    Japan! It's Goh!
SIGN    Congratulations to Miss Nagi's
    Butler, Hayate Ayasaki
SIGN    Hakuou Academy Acceptance Commemoration Party
[11:21] ---
    What do you want to do, Sis?
[11:26] ---
    Do you want to at least wait
    until the party's over?
[11:29] ---
    Yeah, at least...
[11:31] ---
    N-No...
[11:32] ---
    This is my responsibility!
[11:34] ---
    If I don't carry it out,
    I wouldn't be an adult.
[11:40] ---
    Sis...
[11:43] ---
    A-Ayasaki...
[11:45] ---
    Oh, if it isn't Miss Katsura. Welcome!
[11:50] ---
    What is the matter?
[11:51] ---
    Th-The truth is...
[11:55] ---
    The truth is... The truth is...!
[11:57] ---
    Huh?
[11:58] ---
    She has gone to the trouble of
    personally coming from Hakuou Academy
[12:02] ---
    to celebrate the acceptance of Miss
    Nagi's butler, Hayate Ayasaki!
[12:07] ---
    Now, go on! Give us a brief
    speech, if you please!
[12:14] ---
    Uh, um... Well...
[12:20] ---
    Congratulations, Ayasaki!
[12:22] ---
    What?!
[12:24] ---
    Here you are! An acceptance present!
[12:26] ---
    Wow! Thank you very much!
[12:28] ---
    You really worked hard for this!
    It makes me so happy!
[12:32] ---
    Sis!
[12:34] ---
    What?
[12:36] SIGN
    Eek!
[12:37] ---
    That was a counter!
    That, just now, was a counter!
[12:39] ---
    I thought an adult carries
    out her responsibility!
[12:42] ---
    Because! It's just because!
[12:44] ---
    Next up, we have Miss Nagi's close
    friend, Miss Isumi Saginomiya
[12:48] ---
    and she will be delivering
    a congratulatory address.
[12:56] ---
    Um...
[12:59] ---
    Miss Isumi became lost on her way over here,
[13:02] ---
    but she was apparently taken
    into safe custody earlier
[13:04] ---
    at a souvenir shop on the shore of Lake Mashu,
    so that will have to wait until another day.
[13:08] ---
    Same old Isumi.
[13:10] ---
    I wonder how she managed to
    get off the main island...
[13:13] ---
    Next, Miss Nagi's cousin, Miss Sakuya
    Aizawa has sent a congratulatory gift.
[13:20] ---
    Unveil it!
[13:25] ---
    The title is "Soaring"!
SIGN    Soaring
[13:30] ---
    What about it is soaring?
[13:32] ---
    Maybe it's the size or something?
[13:33] ---
    Still, this is a rare party
    to celebrate your acceptance.
[13:38] ---
    It's too bad that both Isumi
    and Sakuya couldn't make it.
[13:41] ---
    It's all right.
[13:42] ---
    Miss Katsura and Hinagiku are here.
    That's more than enough for me.
[13:46] ---
    What?
[13:47] ---
    Come to think of it, why are
    you here, too, Hinagiku?
[13:50] ---
    Th-Th-That's because...
[13:54] ---
    Come here a sec.
[13:56] ---
    What is it?
[13:56] ---
    Just come here.
[13:58] ---
    What? Not accepted?!
[14:00] ---
    Shh! Keep your voice down!
[14:02] ---
    Impossible! Surely, of all people,
     Hayate couldn't have...
[14:05] ---
    It's the truth, so there's no helping it.
[14:07] ---
    I want to let him know somehow, but...
[14:10] ---
    There's no way!
[14:11] ---
    How could we tell him that he didn't
    get accepted after all this?!
[14:15] ---
    Or rather, why did you guys
    decide that he'd been accepted,
[14:17] ---
    even when you hadn't received any word?!
[14:19] ---
    Can't you use your influence
    as student body president?!
[14:22] ---
    If you're going to go there, what about
    the Sanzenin family's influence?!
[14:24] ---
    Now, our festivities are
    in full swing, but...
[14:27] ---
    What exactly is this "full swing"
    from "festivities in full swing"?
[14:30] ---
    Could it be a kind of lassoing?
[14:32] ---
    So anyway, Hayate Ayasaki will now
    offer a speech of thanks for today.
[14:38] ---
    Uh, um...
[14:40] ---
    So many of you have come to celebrate
    tonight for little old me.
[14:46] ---
    Thank you very much.
[14:48] ---
    I never imagined that I might
    get to go back to school...
[14:51] ---
    It's really like a dream come true,
[14:53] ---
    because I'd given up on it.
[14:55] ---
    That I could never go back to high school.
[14:59] ---
    To laugh and fool around with
    my classmates at school...
[15:03] ---
    Those days were ordinary, and yet,
    so dazzling and precious to me.
[15:07] SIGN
    Culture Fest
[15:09] ---
    I thought that no matter
    how much I wished it,
[15:12] ---
    those experiences would never
    be mine to have again.
[15:14] ---
    But now, Miss Nagi has made
    this wish of mine come true.
[15:19] ---
    I am truly fortunate.
[15:22] ---
    To have the pleasure of serving
    such a kind mistress,
[15:25] ---
    I am the luckiest butler in the world.
[15:27] ---
    Hayate...
[15:29] ---
    Th-Thank you so very much.
[15:35] ---
    Ayasaki.
[15:37] ---
    Listen to me, Ayasaki.
[15:39] ---
    Yes, what is it?
[15:40] ---
    Oh, Sis...
[15:42] ---
    The truth is, I have some very
    disappointing news for you.
[15:47] ---
    Disappointing news...?
[15:50] ---
    Yes.
[15:51] ---
    Will she... Will she finally tell him?!
[15:55] ---
    The truth is...
[15:56] ---
    I know.
[15:57] ---
    What?!
[15:58] ---
    Hayate?
[16:02] ---
    You're going to be my
    homeroom teacher, right?
[16:05] ---
    Huh?
[16:06] ---
    Well, certainly, with you
    as my homeroom teacher,
[16:08] ---
    I imagine I have a pretty tough
    school life ahead of me.
[16:11] ---
    I feel like I might get beaten down
    both physically and mentally,
[16:14] ---
    and I'm slightly apprehensive,
[16:16] ---
    but it'll be all right!
[16:17] ---
    I think that will turn out
    to be fun in its own way!
[16:22] ---
    Yes, that sounds like fun!
[16:28] ---
    How long do you plan to
    keep fooling around?!
[16:30] ---
    Whose fault do you think this is?!
[16:32] ---
    B-But...
[16:33] ---
    ...when I look into those innocent eyes,
[16:35] ---
    I just can't bring myself to say it!
    Or rather...
[16:37] ---
    Hey, damn you! Get a clue already!
    Or rather...
[16:40] ---
    That's right!
[16:41] ---
    I'm agonizing so much over here
    and he's smiling like a fool!
[16:45] ---
    Argh! I'm suddenly feeling
    this surge of anger in me!
[16:47] ---
    Sis?!
[16:48] ---
    I've made up my mind!
[16:50] ---
    I'm taking the truth about his
    non-acceptance to my grave!
[16:53] ---
    What?!
[16:54] ---
    That academy is fricking huge!
[16:55] ---
    They'll never notice one fake student!
[16:59] ---
    There is nothing that scares Yukiji Katsura!
[17:02] ---
    What kind of nonsense are you spouting?!
[17:04] ---
    It is not nonsense!
[17:05] ---
    Nonsensers are gonna catch Hellers!
[17:07] ---
    Um, what is this merry conversation about?
[17:11] ---
    O-Oh, it's nothing.
[17:13] ---
    I-It's no big deal.
[17:15] ---
    That was too bad, Hayata.
[17:19] ---
    Y-You three!
[17:21] ---
    What are you doing here?
[17:22] ---
    When we went to visit Katsy's room,
    we found this on her desk.
SIGN    Not Accepted
[17:29] ---
    We figured Hayata would be
    feeling quite despondent,
[17:31] ---
    so we came to cheer him up!
[17:34] ---
    It was really too bad, Hayata.
[17:36] ---
    Surely, you must think there
    is only darkness ahead of you,
[17:39] ---
    that no good will come
    of living out your life.
[17:42] ---
    However, mistakes made in your youth
    will prove valuable in the future!
[17:45] ---
    No matter how much you get
    stomped into the ground,
[17:48] ---
    rise up again like a weed,
    like Princess Sara!
[17:50] ---
    Cheer up, Hayata!
[17:52] ---
    One shot of fight to you!
[17:59] ---
    See you, Hayata!
[18:03] ---
    Um...
[18:05] ---
    Um, I haven't quite grasped
    the situation yet, but...
SIGN    Not Accepted
[18:10] ---
    So, the upshot of it was that I
    was not accepted... Is that it?
[18:17] ---
    Yeah.
[18:19] ---
    I...
[18:21] ---
    I see.
[18:23] ---
    I'm sorry!
[18:24] ---
    It's all my fault!
[18:27] ---
    So roast me or boil me, do
    whatever you want with me!
[18:29] ---
    Or rather, just kill me!
[18:32] ---
    Oh... Huh?
[18:33] ---
    He's gone.
[18:35] ---
    Hayate?!
[18:37] ---
    Hayate!
[18:39] ---
    Where did he go?
[18:57] ---
    If you stay out here for too long,
    you're going to catch a cold.
[19:08] ---
    Nagi and Miss Katsura and the
    others are worried, too.
[19:13] ---
    I have done a terrible
    disservice to the Miss.
[19:17] ---
    What?
[19:18] ---
    And to Miss Katsura and Hinagiku, too...
[19:21] ---
    To all the people who
    celebrated with me today...
[19:25] ---
    Hayate?
[19:27] ---
    It was my fault for getting really
    happy and getting my hopes up!
[19:32] ---
    It's stupid, isn't it?
[19:33] ---
    Before I came to this great mansion,
[19:35] ---
    I knew I shouldn't have
    any hopes for the future.
[19:38] ---
    Because that way,
    I wouldn't have to suffer...
[19:40] ---
    I thought I'd learned that lesson...
[19:42] ---
    But as I allowed myself to be spoiled
[19:45] ---
    by the Miss's kindness and
    yours and everyone else's...
[19:47] ---
    ...I had begun to forget that
    most basic of lessons...
[19:51] ---
    It's better to be empty, because
    you have nothing to lose.
[19:55] ---
    So...
[19:56] ---
    So...
[19:59] ---
    Do you think such an empty person
    is qualified to be Nagi's butler?
[20:04] ---
    Th-That is...
[20:06] ---
    No, of course, I'm aware that
    I've been a burden in many ways.
[20:11] ---
    But I plan to pull myself
    together more than ever
[20:13] ---
    and do my best from now on.
[20:15] ---
    Do your best?
[20:19] ---
    What?
[20:21] ---
    Oh? But the look on your face says you can't
    possibly do your best all on your own.
[20:25] ---
    M-Maria?
[20:29] ---
    So...
SIGN    Student ID
[20:32] ---
    Please go here and study hard.
[20:38] ---
    What?!
[20:39] ---
    Th-This is from Hakuou Academy...
[20:41] ---
    My student ID?!
[20:43] ---
    Yes!
[20:44] ---
    I submitted a recommendation for you,
[20:46] ---
    and with that added,
    I had them deem that you passed.
[20:51] ---
    Because an empty person
    who has nothing to lose
[20:54] ---
    does not have the qualifications
    to be her butler.
[20:58] ---
    Maria...
[21:02] ---
    Hayate, I think there will come a day
[21:05] ---
    when you will truly be required to
    use your abilities to protect her.
[21:10] ---
    So, please become Nagi's first-rate butler.
[21:16] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[21:17] ---
    I'll go to Hakuou and I'll become
    a first-rate butler, without fail!
[21:23] ---
    Yes!
[21:24] ---
    All right!
[21:25] ---
    I'm going to work hard!
[21:27] ---
    I'll become a first-rate butler,
    for Maria's sake, too!
[21:32] ---
    It isn't for my sake, though...
[21:36] ---
    Or rather...
[21:37] ---
    I can't believe how boldly
    I behaved towards Hayate!
[21:41] ---
    And that was the story of how Maria
    became embarrassed way too late.
[21:45] ---
    If you're going to get embarrassed,
    don't do it in the first place!
[21:48] ---
    Next time, he'll fight the
    expectations of high school girls!
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:13] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:13] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:31] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:31] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:49] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:49] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:03] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:03] ---
    Stars so beautiful, it'll
    be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    Good morn-even-noon! I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:32] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:33] ---
    I don't really get it,
[23:35] ---
    but you'll be able to go to
    school, after all, right?
[23:37] ---
    Yes, thank you very much.
[23:39] ---
    I hope to study hard in order to
    acquit myself well as your butler.
[23:43] ---
    R-Really?
[23:44] ---
    I guess you're seriously thinking
    about your future with me, too.
[23:48] ---
    What is the matter, Miss?
[23:50] ---
    Oh, it's nothing.
[23:51] ---
    I was just meditating a little.
    It's Aura Power!
[23:54] ---
    Bye!
[23:56] SIGN
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    I was in high spirits,
    just by getting accepted,
[23:59] ---
    but I transferred with borderline grades.
    Will I really be able to cut it?
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:02] ---
    Knowing you, you'll be fine.
[24:04] ---
    In battle, you must always be
    reading two or three moves ahead.
[24:07] ---
    Waking up early can certainly pay off.
    You get to meet interesting people.
[24:10] ---
    If I make the jab that he's the most
    interesting person here, would I lose?
[24:13] ---
    Probably.
[24:14] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:16] ---
    "Samurai, the Way of the
    Warrior, Van Damme in Action".
[24:18] ---
    Himuro, is that enough with the flowers?
[24:19] SIGN
    Samurai, the Way of the Warrior,
    Van Damme in Action
[24:19] ---
    Thank you, Little Master Taiga.
[24:21] ---
    The things Ayasaki does are dangerous,
    so never try them at home.

15 - Samurai, the Way of the Warrior, Van Damme in Action

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright and
    sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:15] ---
    All right, I'm going to do my best!
[00:17] ---
    Okay, I keep this up and I
    can finish this large pizza!
[00:21] ---
    Wait, that's not it!
[00:22] ---
    I have to get recharged and
    prepare for tomorrow's exam!
[00:32] ---
    Hayate, I wonder what you're eating tonight.
[00:37] ---
    To the butler-in-debt, it was a wish
    that was never to come true again.
[00:53] SIGN
    Student ID
[00:56] ---
    It wasn't a dream.
[00:57] ---
    I can go to school again.
[01:02] ---
    And I owe it all to Maria
    for recommending me.
[01:06] ---
    M-Maria?
[01:09] ---
    So...
[01:12] ---
    Please go here and study hard.
SIGN    Student ID
[01:17] ---
    What?!
[01:18] ---
    Th-This is from Hakuou Academy...
[01:21] ---
    My student ID?!
[01:23] ---
    Please watch me, Maria!
[01:25] ---
    I will also strive to live up to
    your expectations, without fail!
[01:28] ---
    All right!
[01:30] ---
    I'm going to attend Hakuou Academy
    and become a first-rate butler!
[01:33] ---
    No, no. Even if you go to school,
[01:35] ---
    it's not like that'll turn you
    into a first-rate butler.
[01:39] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:42] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:45] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:49] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:52] ---
    Yes!
[01:53] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:58] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[02:02] ---
    I shall patiently teach you what
    it is to be a first-rate butler.
[02:08] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[02:08] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:15] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:15] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:21] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:21] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:24] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:24] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:29] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:29] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:34] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:34] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:37] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:37] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:42] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:42] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:46] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:46] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:52] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:52] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:59] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:59] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[03:02] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[03:02] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[03:05] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[03:05] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:11] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:11] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:18] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:18] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:36] SIGN
    Samurai, the Way of the Warrior, Van Damme in Action
[03:45] ---
    You seem awfully happy, Hayate.
[03:47] ---
    Whoa! I didn't know you
    stayed the night, Hinagiku!
[03:49] ---
    G-Good morning.
[03:51] ---
    Morning.
[03:52] ---
    But what's the matter?
    You seem to be in an awfully foul mood...
[03:56] ---
    You have to ask?!
[03:58] ---
    Really! You suddenly disappeared
    like that yesterday evening,
[04:01] ---
    you showed no signs of coming
    back late into the night,
[04:04] ---
    and you were absolutely nowhere to be found.
[04:06] ---
    And after all that, you don't think
    you caused anyone to worry?!
[04:10] ---
    I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
    I'm really sorry! I really am sorry!
[04:13] ---
    So, judging by your behavior,
    you got accepted?
[04:16] ---
    Oh, yes, thank you.
[04:21] ---
    Then I'll forgive you for the time being.
[04:23] ---
    I'm going home now,
[04:25] ---
    but be sure to say hello
    if you see me at school.
[04:27] ---
    What? Oh, all right. Roger that.
[04:29] ---
    Good.
[04:37] ---
    We'll be students at the same school...
[04:45] ---
    So, you've been holding your
    student ID since last night?
[04:50] ---
    Yes! I slept with it in
    my hands all night long!
[04:52] ---
    I swear! How adorable can you get?!
[04:55] ---
    I guess it made you really happy.
[04:58] ---
    Yes!
[04:59] ---
    You know those people who
    burst into song in musicals?
[05:02] ---
    I think I know what that
    urge feels like now!
[05:05] ---
    You don't need to get how that feels!
[05:07] ---
    There aren't any character songs
    for a scene like this anyway.
[05:10] ---
    Or rather, a musical anime would
    be tough production-wise.
[05:14] ---
    Right...
[05:15] ---
    Oh, that reminds me, what
    should I do about a uniform?
[05:18] ---
    Uniform?
[05:19] ---
    Yes. Hakuou's students wear uniforms, right?
[05:22] ---
    Staying in my butler uniform would be...
[05:23] ---
    You shouldn't need one.
[05:25] ---
    What?
[05:25] ---
    Indeed. And it will be easier to
    tell you apart that way, too.
[05:28] ---
    Don't worry. There are other
    butlers at the school, too.
[05:33] ---
    Besides, the others will respect
    you more in your butler uniform.
[05:37] ---
    What?
[05:38] ---
    But the bigger question is whether
    we'll be in the same class or not.
[05:42] ---
    What?!
[05:42] ---
    Indeed.
[05:44] ---
    What are you saying? I'll be in high school.
[05:47] ---
    You're still 13 years old,
    so you're in middle school.
[05:50] ---
    Oh, right, you don't know, do you?
[05:52] ---
    Huh? Know what?
[05:54] ---
    I've skipped grades, so I'm in high school.
[06:00] ---
    What?! You're in high school?!
[06:03] ---
    Don't be so surprised.
[06:04] ---
    That's... But, it's like that
    4-panel comic series...
[06:07] ---
    Ah-ah! Don't say any more than that!
[06:09] ---
    But how is it possible? You're so little!
[06:11] ---
    Don't call me little!
[06:13] ---
    B-But... really?
[06:15] ---
    Darn it! You're one skeptical bastard!
[06:17] ---
    Fine, take a look at this!
[06:19] ---
    Ta-da!
[06:19] ---
    Student ID
[06:21] ---
    Th-This is...!
[06:24] ---
    You look so grumpy in the photo.
[06:26] ---
    That's not the jab you should be making!
[06:29] ---
    Wow! That really is a high school ID!
[06:33] ---
    I told you so from the start, didn't I?!
[06:37] ---
    Hakuou has butlers, people
    who've skipped grades,
[06:40] ---
    and all kinds of other
    students, so it's quite fun.
[06:43] ---
    Wow, I had no idea.
[06:45] ---
    Wait, I had to work hard
    to make you believe me,
[06:49] ---
    but I guess you implicitly
    believe what Maria says.
[06:51] ---
    Oh, no, I didn't really mean it like that.
[06:53] ---
    Honestly! Taking me for a fool!
[06:55] ---
    I may not look it, but my grades are...
[06:59] ---
    In that case, I hope we
    end up in the same class.
[07:05] ---
    Y-Yeah...
[07:07] ---
    Oh, I can't wait for it to be Monday!
[07:10] ---
    And so, to accommodate length issues,
[07:13] ---
    maybe we'll just skip forward
    all the way to Monday morning.
[07:20] ---
    Wow...
[07:29] ---
    See that? There's nothing here when
    you come this early in the morning.
[07:33] ---
    We're not doing this again after today.
[07:37] ---
    That's my school.
[07:39] ---
    I know that already.
[07:40] ---
    Oh, do you? Had you already found out?
[07:44] ---
    Are you okay?
[07:46] ---
    Well, it's fine if you're just happy.
[07:48] ---
    But you certainly are amazing. Skipping
    grades to be in high school.
[07:53] ---
    It's not especially amazing.
[07:55] ---
    I'm not the only one who's skipped grades.
[07:57] ---
    A couple students to it every year.
[07:58] ---
    What?
[07:59] ---
    Besides, the record holder for
    skipping grades at this school
[08:03] ---
    enrolled at age 10 and graduated at age 13.
[08:06] ---
    What?!
[08:07] ---
    On top of that, she served as student
    body president two terms in a row
[08:10] ---
    and her grades were at the top of her
    class for all 3 years by a wide margin.
[08:13] ---
    A formidable student with 3 of the silver
    watches awarded to the top achiever.
[08:17] ---
    I see. I guess behemoths like
    that really exist in this world.
[08:21] ---
    There is a behemoth like
    that, really close to you.
[08:28] ---
    Oh, dear, have I caught a cold?
[08:31] ---
    Anyway, students who skip
    grades or transfer in
[08:33] ---
    or have their tuition waived
    as scholarship students...
[08:36] ---
    They have a duty to contribute to
    the school's record, reputation,
[08:40] ---
    and rate of college enrollment.
[08:41] ---
    If students like that get bad grades,
[08:44] ---
    they inevitably face flunking or
    other harsh punishments sometimes.
[08:48] ---
    Th-They do?!
[08:51] ---
    Come to think of it,
[08:52] ---
    the student council people
    said something similar, too.
[08:56] ---
    I was in high spirits,
    just by getting accepted,
[08:58] ---
    but this is still a prestigious school.
[09:01] ---
    I transferred in with borderline grades.
    Will I really be able to cut it?
[09:05] ---
    But knowing you, you'll be fine.
[09:07] ---
    You're capable of anything, after all.
[09:10] ---
    What's wrong, Hayate?
[09:15] ---
    In battle, you must always be
    reading two or three moves ahead.
[09:19] ---
    By Char Aznable.
[09:22] ---
    Waking up early can certainly pay off.
    You get to meet interesting people.
[09:28] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
[09:30] ---
    If I make the jab that he's the most
    interesting person here, would I lose?
[09:30] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
[09:34] ---
    Probably.
[09:35] ---
    Or rather, was there a point to the
    saying that he quoted earlier?
[09:39] ---
    Himuro, is that enough with the flowers?
[09:41] ---
    Thank you, Little Master Taiga.
[09:43] ---
    Himuro thanked me!
[09:45] ---
    Um...
[09:46] ---
    That outfit... You're a butler as well?
[09:48] ---
    Uh, yes, I'm a butler of the
    Sanzenin household. My name is...
[09:51] ---
    Sanzenin?
[09:52] ---
    Oh, so you're the one...
[09:55] ---
    Which means...
[09:56] ---
    Wow, he's really pretty.
[10:01] ---
    Hey, what are you trying to do to Hayate?!
[10:03] ---
    Yes, that's right.
[10:04] ---
    As I recall, if someone can make
    this young lady apologize in tears,
[10:08] ---
    that person gets to inherit the
    Sanzenin family fortune...
[10:13] ---
    I won't let you lay a hand on the Miss!
[10:15] ---
    I will protect her!
[10:16] ---
    Hayate!
[10:18] ---
    Well, to be honest, I have my source
    of funds called Little Master Taiga,
[10:22] ---
    so I'm not really interested.
[10:24] ---
    Source of funds?!
[10:27] ---
    It's going to be stolen from you
    if you're not paying attention.
[10:30] ---
    Huh?
[10:32] ---
    W-Wait, that's my string tie!
     How did you do that?!
[10:36] ---
    A foolish question.
[10:38] ---
    It's obvious, isn't it?
[10:41] ---
    It's because I'm a first-rate butler.
[10:44] ---
    A first-rate... butler...?
[10:46] ---
    People don't wear butler uniforms
    at this school just for show.
[10:51] ---
    We shall be on our way now, Little Master.
[10:52] ---
    Oh, okay!
[10:56] ---
    Incredible!
[10:57] ---
    So that's the pinnacle of what I
    want to be, a first-rate butler!
[11:00] ---
    Well, not that I understand how
    that's related to being a butler...
[11:05] ---
    Butlers are incredible, aren't they, Miss?!
[11:08] ---
    I don't really care, but you
    never got your string tie back.
[11:12] ---
    Oh, shoot!
[11:13] ---
    Wait, he's gone already!
[11:19] ---
    So this is... This is what it
    is to be a first-rate butler!
[11:22] ---
    No, that was out-and-out theft.
[11:24] ---
    Or rather, don't force me to take
    jabs at your monologues, too.
[11:29] ---
    Suke, Kaku, teach them a lesson.
[11:34] ---
    I'll make coffee for you any time.
[11:37] ---
    I'm so sorry, Maria.
[11:39] ---
    Honestly! What did you go to school for?
[11:44] ---
    There.
[11:46] ---
    This time, please go to school properly
    without losing your string tie.
[11:50] ---
    O-Of course! You can count on me!
[11:53] ---
    Are you sure about that?
[11:54] ---
    I can't breathe! I can't breathe, Maria!
[11:57] ---
    Hey, we're going to be late!
[11:59] ---
    I wouldn't mind it one bit if
    you decide not to go, you know!
[12:02] ---
    Oh, I'm going! I'm going!
[12:03] ---
    Then I'll see you two later.
[12:05] ---
    Yes, we'll be going then!
[12:07] ---
    Come, Miss!
[12:08] ---
    Hey, you stupid! Quit it!
[12:09] ---
    This is embarrassing!
[12:16] ---
    Quiet down!
[12:18] ---
    Starting today, we're going to have
    a new friend joining our class!
[12:22] ---
    Is it a transfer student, Katsy?
[12:24] ---
    Is it a boy? Or a girl?
[12:26] ---
    It's a boy, more or less.
[12:27] ---
    What do you mean, "more or less"?
[12:30] ---
    Me! Katsy, is this boy a cool guy?
[12:33] ---
    What? You want to know if he's cool?
[12:35] ---
    I-It makes me nervous if they're
    going to talk about stuff like that.
[12:39] ---
    I bet Ayasaki's nervous.
[12:42] ---
    All right! I'll take this chance
[12:44] ---
    to soften up the crowd for him,
    and to make up for earlier.
[12:48] ---
    The transfer student is really cute!
[12:51] ---
    What?!
[12:52] ---
    He's kind of like
[12:53] ---
    if you boil down Kimutaku and
    Tackey's DNA with Joe Odagiri
[12:56] ---
    and add Orly and Brad Pitt to the mix!
[12:59] ---
    Just hearing his voice
    will make you feel faint!
[13:01] ---
    The sound effect for a sidelong
    glance from him is like "BAM"!
[13:04] ---
    And he's sort of like Golgo for girls.
[13:07] ---
    Not to mention, he's a butler
    for the Sanzenin family!
[13:09] ---
    He's practically a genius
[13:11] ---
    and his athletic abilities
    are incredible, too!
[13:13] ---
    Huh? A butler for the Sanzenin family?
[13:16] ---
    And so...!
[13:18] ---
    Transfer student, please come on in!
[13:23] ---
    Uh, hello.
[13:28] ---
    Is that Hayata?
[13:30] ---
    Wait, I thought he didn't pass
    the transfer admission test.
[13:34] ---
    Well, a lot happened...
[13:37] ---
    Oh, their focus on me hurts...
[13:40] ---
    Aww. So the cool transfer
    student was Hayata.
[13:45] ---
    Well, it's true that he's
    not exactly ugly, but...
[13:49] ---
    We're talking about some awfully
    poor-looking Orlys and Brad Pitts.
[13:53] ---
    Okay, Ayasaki, come introduce yourself.
[13:56] ---
    What?!
[13:59] ---
    I-It's easy for you to give
    me this satisfied look,
[14:02] ---
    as if to say, "I warmed
    up the crowd for you!"...
[14:09] ---
    So this is adversity!
[14:11] ---
    This classroom is so cold, like it
    got hit with the Crackle spell,
[14:13] ---
    and to think I have to introduce myself!
[14:15] ---
    It can't be helped.
[14:16] ---
    I can't very well bring shame to the Miss.
[14:20] ---
    The boy named Hayate Ayasaki has worked
    among adults from a tender age.
[14:25] ---
    And so...
[14:29] ---
    Nice to meet you.
[14:31] ---
    This kind of sales-pitch smile
    is one of his greatest fortes.
[14:37] ---
    As Miss Katsura just mentioned in her
    introduction, I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[14:43] ---
    As a butler of the Sanzenin household,
[14:45] ---
    I have the honor of serving Miss
    Nagi, who is also in this class.
[14:50] ---
    Miss Katsura's earlier introduction
    was a little exaggerated
[14:53] ---
    and I myself am not a
    particularly astute student,
[14:58] ---
    but I hope that I can have fun
    learning alongside all of you.
[15:04] ---
    So, I look forward to
    getting to know everyone.
[15:18] ---
    There, I've repaid my debt!
[15:23] ---
    Ah, but school really is such fun, isn't it?
[15:27] ---
    What? You think so?
[15:29] ---
    Aren't you having fun, Miss?
[15:32] ---
    There are a lot of people here.
[15:34] ---
    I want to live as quietly and
    inconspicuously as possible,
[15:37] ---
    and spend the majority of
    my days on manga and games.
[15:41] ---
    That's called a useless member of society.
[15:43] ---
    The reason I skipped grades
[15:45] ---
    was also because I didn't want to
    go to school for 12 whole years.
[15:48] ---
    Th-That's really hardcore.
[15:51] ---
    But I am happy that I get to go
    to school like this with you.
[15:55] ---
    What?
[15:56] ---
    I suppose I have Maria to
    thank for that as well.
[16:01] ---
    And I have you to thank, too.
[16:06] ---
    If you hadn't laid the groundwork for this,
[16:10] ---
    I would not be here today.
[16:15] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[16:19] ---
    No, uh, right...
[16:22] ---
    Getting to be with you, I also...
[16:25] ---
    You still like the unpopular spots,
    the same as ever, don't you?
[16:28] ---
    H-Hinagiku, you...!
[16:30] ---
    Oh, Hinagiku, hello.
[16:31] ---
    Hello.
[16:32] ---
    But what are you doing out here?
[16:36] ---
    A little something came up, so I
    thought I'd drop by the clubroom.
[16:38] ---
    This is a shortcut.
[16:40] ---
    Wow, you're the student body president,
[16:42] ---
    and you still participate in
    extracurricular activities!
[16:44] ---
    What's the use if you
    can't juggle that much?
[16:47] ---
    Come to think of it,
[16:48] ---
    don't you participate in any
    extracurricular activities, Miss?
[16:50] ---
    Huh? Why?
[16:52] ---
    Well, I do believe the best
    part of going to school
[16:54] ---
    is participating in extracurricular
    activities with your friends.
[16:57] ---
    Y-You fool! I have no need
    for such things anymore!
[17:01] ---
    Oh, but you're still a
    registered member, you know.
[17:04] ---
    Hinagiku!
[17:05] ---
    Um, what registered member?
[17:07] ---
    She's in the same club as I am.
[17:09] ---
    Y-You fool! Th-That was just
    a one-day trial membership!
[17:13] ---
    You treated it as a darned
    application without my permission!
[17:15] ---
    So, what club?
[17:17] ---
    The kendo team.
[17:19] ---
    The kendo team?!
[17:22] ---
    When I started high school,
[17:24] ---
    there was a time when I thought
    that the acute societal withdrawal
[17:27] ---
    might be problematic if it continued...
[17:29] SIGN
    Kendo Team
[17:32] ---
    So, based on what I saw during the
    new student recruitment activities,
[17:35] ---
    I thought about getting
    into some kind of sport.
[17:44] ---
    Because she was really cool.
[17:47] ---
    But why did she quit?
[17:49] ---
    Beats me. Ask her.
[17:51] ---
    Well, because...
[17:53] ---
    Both the protective gear and
    the bamboo sword were heavy
[17:55] ---
    and I couldn't move very well.
[17:56] ---
    That's why you should use
    the children's sizes
[17:58] ---
    instead of the same equipment as me.
[18:00] ---
    Like hell I'm using children's equipment!
[18:02] ---
    But you quit just because of that?
[18:05] ---
    Yes, I quit just because of that.
[18:08] ---
    Because I knew right away.
[18:11] ---
    That even if I practiced the same sport,
[18:13] ---
    it was unlikely that I'd ever be like her.
[18:20] ---
    So there was a time when the Miss
    tried a sport on her own initiative.
[18:26] ---
    But if I leave the Miss to her own devices,
[18:28] ---
    she's going to end up a deadbeat
    slacker or an internet game addict.
[18:32] ---
    I'm thinking finding employment
    might mean an admission of defeat.
[18:37] ---
    All right, Miss!
[18:39] ---
    How about you come take a peek at the
    kendo team with me after school?!
[18:42] ---
    Huh?
[18:51] ---
    Wow, so this is the kendo team.
[18:54] ---
    Of course. Like hell this could be
    the manga club or the anime club.
[18:58] SIGN
    Be pure, righteous, and beautiful
[18:59] ---
    But I feel like there aren't
    that many people...
[19:01] ---
    Well, it's not a popular club
    to begin with at this school.
[19:05] ---
    You look good in your uniform, Hinagiku.
[19:08] ---
    What?
[19:09] ---
    What?!
[19:10] ---
    W-Why, thank you.
[19:12] ---
    Then, shall we get the
    introductions out of the way
[19:14] ---
    and get you practicing
    with us a bit, Hayate?
[19:16] ---
    That guy just...
[19:17] ---
    ...addressed Miss Katsura as "Hinagiku"!
[19:19] ---
    A-And she called him "Hayate"?!
[19:21] ---
    But Hinagiku, what about my protective gear?
[19:24] ---
    Can't you do without, Hayate?
[19:26] ---
    B-But Hinagiku...
[19:28] ---
    "Hinagiku"! "Hayate"! "Hinagiku"! "Hayate"!
[19:32] ---
    Then I'll get permission
    from our advisor first.
[19:35] ---
    Miss Katsura.
[19:36] ---
    There's no need to let a guy like
    him practice kendo with us.
[19:39] ---
    Azumamiya...
[19:41] ---
    You there, butler.
[19:43] ---
    Fight me!
[19:45] ---
    What?!
[19:46] ---
    If you lose to me, never come here again!
[19:48] ---
    Even if he wins, it's not
    like we'll come again.
[19:51] ---
    Hey!
[19:52] ---
    If I lose here, the Miss will
    never practice kendo...
[19:55] ---
    No, I doubt she'll attempt
    any other sport, either.
[19:59] ---
    In which case, I can't lose!
[20:01] ---
    I understand! I will accept your challenge!
[20:04] ---
    Hayate?
[20:06] ---
    Oh, a flurry of petals!
[20:08] ---
    This is getting interesting.
[20:10] ---
    Becoming a sword for your mistress...
[20:13] ---
    Quite a fine approach to take.
[20:15] ---
    Oh, you're the Prince of Ties!
[20:17] ---
    Please give me back the string tie!
[20:19] ---
    Thank you for the interesting
    nickname. But no, thank you.
[20:22] ---
    Heave-ho. Heave-ho.
[20:25] ---
    But I wonder if the Little Master
    Azumamiya is up to fighting him.
[20:29] ---
    What?
[20:30] ---
    Take a look.
[20:36] ---
    H-His swordsman's chi
    is striking the petals!
[20:40] ---
    Hiten...
[20:41] ---
    Don't!
[20:42] ---
    And due to copyright issues,
    don't say any more either!
[20:45] ---
    I see, so it means there's
    no need for me to hold back.
[20:48] ---
    You said your name was Hayate, was it?!
[20:49] ---
    Y-Yes.
[20:50] ---
    I, Kotaro Azumamiya, have
    judged you to be an opponent,
[20:53] ---
    whom I must spend the rest
    of my life to defeat!
[20:58] ---
    Heave-ho. Heave-ho.
[21:03] ---
    The mystery kendo team member, who
    has suddenly declared a rivalry,
[21:06] ---
    Kotaro Azumamiya.
[21:08] ---
    How powerful might he actually be?
[21:10] ---
    The story has suddenly taken a
    classic school drama turn of events
[21:15] ---
    and next time, he will finally
    fight his destined rival.
[21:19] ---
    Hold on a second!
[21:21] ---
    When did I ever say that I would fight?!
[21:23] ---
    Nonohara!
[21:24] ---
    Come, Nonohara!
[21:25] ---
    Nonohara?
[21:26] ---
    He's my butler.
[21:28] ---
    Your opponent...
[21:30] ---
    ...will be this combat
    butler, Kaede Nonohara!
[21:33] ---
    C-Combat butler?!
[21:35] ---
    Um, it seems next time,
    he'll be fighting this guy.
[21:41] ---
    Himuro, is that enough with the flowers?
[21:43] ---
    Thank you, Little Master Taiga.
[21:46] ---
    Um, could I ask the non-members to leave?
[21:49] ---
    What did this guy show up for?
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:31] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:31] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful, it'll
    be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Hey, there, I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:32] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:33] ---
    I'm Hinagiku Katsura.
[23:34] ---
    Hinagiku, when did you get here?
[23:36] ---
    What's this, Hinagiku?
    What are you here for?
[23:38] ---
    I'm going to be in this segment
    for a while, too, now.
[23:41] ---
    Well, speaking of you, Hinagiku,
[23:42] ---
    it seems you're #1 in popularity in
    a certain weekly manga magazine.
[23:45] ---
    Truly impressive!
[23:45] ---
    Oh, Hayate, flattery won't
    get you anything, you know.
[23:48] ---
    No, no, you excel both
    academically and athletically.
[23:49] ---
    I wish the Miss would learn a
    thing or two from you, too.
[23:52] ---
    Hayate, it's time already!
[23:53] ---
    What are you so angry for, Miss?
[23:55] ---
    Good grief.
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    So, there you have it. Hello,
    I am Kaede Nonohara.
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    I serve as a butler for
    the Azumamiya family.
[24:02] ---
    Now, Nonohara, defeat him right this minute!
[24:04] ---
    Certainly.
[24:05] ---
    Safety Shutter!
[24:07] ---
    Hayate!
[24:08] ---
    We butlers are not tools
    to be used by our masters.
[24:11] ---
    It is not as if we must
    merely do as we are told.
[24:13] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:15] ---
    "Even in Defeat, Kendo Rage".
[24:17] ---
    Hayate, I have faith in you.
[24:18] ---
    That there's no way you'll lose
    against a butler like him!
[24:19] SIGN
    Even in Defeat, Kendo Rage
[24:21] ---
    Wipe away the tears beneath the mask.

16 - Even in the Defeat, Kendo Rage

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    Waking up early can certainly pay off.
    You get to meet interesting people.
[00:15] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
[00:18] ---
    Nonohara!
[00:19] ---
    Come, Nonohara!
[00:20] ---
    Your opponent...
[00:21] ---
    ...will be this combat butler,
    Kaede Nonohara!
[00:25] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:28] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:31] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[00:34] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[00:38] ---
    Yes!
[00:39] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[00:43] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[00:48] ---
    Yes! I will fight using kendo today!
[00:54] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[00:54] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:01] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:01] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:07] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:07] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:10] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:10] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:15] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:15] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:20] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:20] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:23] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:23] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:28] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:28] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:32] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:32] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[01:38] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[01:38] ---
    Just let it take you
[01:45] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[01:45] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[01:48] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[01:48] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[01:51] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[01:51] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[01:57] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[01:57] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:04] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:04] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:22] ---
    Even in Defeat, Kendo Rage
[02:30] ---
    Your opponent will be my butler,
    Kaede Nonohara!
[02:34] ---
    Your butler?!
[02:37] ---
    So, there you have it. Hello.
[02:39] ---
    I am Kaede Nonohara.
[02:42] ---
    I serve as a butler
    for the Azumamiya family.
[02:46] ---
    He's a butler, too?!
[02:48] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
[02:50] ---
    Now, Nonohara, that's him!
    Defeat him right this minute!
[02:55] ---
    Certainly.
[02:56] ---
    But before I do that...
[03:04] ---
    What?!
[03:06] ---
    Ooh! Down, diagonal left, left, and kick!
[03:08] ---
    What is this, the Tornado Whirlwind Kick?!
[03:13] ---
    N-Nonohara, what are you...?
[03:15] ---
    Did I not teach you this, Young Master?
[03:19] ---
    If you are a man, you must take
    on even the impossible opponents.
[03:24] ---
    And yet, you turned to me
    without having fought him,
[03:27] ---
    seeking to do nothing yourself.
[03:29] ---
    I do not recall raising you...
[03:33] ---
    ...to be such a damn weakling!
SIGN    Can't show you!
[03:37] ---
    H-Himuro, you wouldn't go
    to such extremes, right?
[03:41] ---
    Nonohara certainly is as strict as ever.
[03:44] ---
    But is this all right?
[03:45] ---
    He's a butler, and to be acting like that...
[03:47] ---
    What are you saying?
[03:49] ---
    What?
[03:50] ---
    We butlers are not tools
    to be used by our masters.
[03:54] ---
    It is not as if we must
    merely do as we are told.
[03:57] ---
    There was a time when only the eldest
    sons of nobles could become butlers.
[04:01] ---
    It was an exalted occupation.
[04:03] ---
    In other words, that's just how
    much responsibility it entails.
[04:06] ---
    A responsibility to steer your master
    or mistress in the right direction.
[04:13] ---
    Isn't that why you want to show her
    the joy of participating in a sport?
[04:17] ---
    To your spineless, weak-willed
    manga freak of a mistress,
[04:20] ---
    who suffers from acute societal withdrawal.
[04:21] ---
    Who are you calling a spineless,
    weak-willed manga freak,
[04:23] ---
    who suffers from acute societal withdrawal?!
[04:28] ---
    I-I-I'm sorry, Nonohara!
    I get it! I get it already!
[04:31] ---
    No! Today of all days,
    you are not getting away with this.
[04:35] ---
    That depraved nature of yours...
[04:36] ---
    I will beat it out of you,
[04:39] ---
    from the very marrow of your bones!
[04:42] ---
    NOOO!
[04:50] ---
    Would you try not to go on such
    a rampage in the kendo training hall?
[04:53] ---
    Nonohara?
[04:54] ---
    Miss Katsura...
[04:55] ---
    This is the educational
    policy of our household.
[04:58] ---
    May I ask you not to interfere too much?
[05:00] ---
    I'm sorry, but I can't really do that.
[05:03] ---
    I'm the student council president,
[05:05] ---
    so when I see a student in trouble,
    I can't not help them.
[05:08] ---
    Miss Katsura...
[05:10] ---
    Even if Azumamiya
    is a wimpy, pitiful crybaby,
[05:13] ---
    I just can't not help him.
[05:16] ---
    Huh?
[05:16] ---
    That's the student
    council president for you.
[05:18] ---
    A brilliant attack, precisely pulverizing
    your opponent's vital points.
[05:22] ---
    I-I haven't attacked any vital points!
[05:26] ---
    I get it. I get it, Nonohara.
[05:29] ---
    Just as you say, being weak is no good!
[05:30] ---
    Young Master?
[05:32] ---
    So as you said, a man has to fight
    and carve out his own path, doesn't he?!
[05:37] ---
    Ah! Young Master! So you understand!
[05:40] ---
    Therefore!
[05:41] ---
    Huh?
[05:42] ---
    Fight me, Sanzenin!
[05:44] ---
    What?!
[05:44] ---
    Um, Azumamiya...
[05:47] ---
    Could I get your reasoning
    behind that at least?
[05:49] ---
    I promise I won't get mad.
[05:51] ---
    I figured out that it was wrong.
[05:54] ---
    What?
[05:55] ---
    It's just weird for a master
    to fight a butler!
[05:58] ---
    Or rather, I have no
    chance of winning anyway.
[05:59] ---
    In which case, the right thing would be
    for master to fight mistress
[06:02] ---
    and butler to fight butler!
[06:05] ---
    Is he all right?
[06:07] ---
    Nah, I don't think so.
[06:08] ---
    I guess butlers have a tough job
[06:09] ---
    steering their masters
    or mistresses in the right direction.
[06:13] ---
    Ah! Young Master! You do me proud!
[06:15] ---
    What?!
[06:16] ---
    So you have finally realized that fact!
[06:19] ---
    I-I guess he's okay with that.
[06:22] ---
    You heard them, Nagi.
    What do you want to do?
[06:24] ---
    That's easy for you to ask...
[06:27] ---
    Then I guess there's no helping it.
[06:28] ---
    What?
[06:31] ---
    Then, I'll be Azumamiya's opponent.
[06:34] ---
    What?!
[06:35] ---
    H-Hey, Hinagiku!
[06:37] ---
    With the shape you're in,
[06:38] ---
    you'll kill your arms if you suddenly
    start swinging a bamboo sword.
[06:41] ---
    You haven't been training at all.
[06:43] ---
    Besides, even if Azumamiya's
    our weakest member,
[06:48] ---
    his lack of skill means his strikes
    are all over the place,
[06:50] ---
    so he's dangerous!
[06:52] ---
    With two opponents who don't know how
    to handle bamboo swords,
[06:54] ---
    it'd be terrible if you
    hurt each other, right?
[06:57] ---
    Uh, wait. Azumamiya?
[06:59] ---
    I understand.
[07:00] ---
    It seems fighting you is a fate
    that I cannot avoid.
[07:04] ---
    Unconsciously hitting one
    vital point after another...
[07:07] ---
    Hinagiku really is something.
[07:09] ---
    All right!
[07:10] ---
    In that case, I have no choice
    but to use this sword
[07:12] ---
    to prove that I am stronger than you!
[07:14] ---
    Here we go, Nonohara!
[07:15] ---
    Yes, Young Master!
[07:17] ---
    Well, so there you have it.
    Good luck to us both, Hayate.
[07:20] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[07:21] ---
    I must win this fight and have
    the Miss continue with kendo!
[07:33] ---
    Whether they win or lose,
[07:34] ---
    I have no intention of returning
    to the kendo team, though.
[07:41] ---
    I found a 4-leaf clover.
    (Yotsuba no kuroobaa mitsuketa.)
[07:45] ---
    It was an accident! Help, Nonohara!
    (Tamatama-nandesu. Tasukete Nonohara!)
[07:55] ---
    Incidentally, kids at home,
[07:57] ---
    for safety, make sure you wear
    head guards during kendo matches.
[08:00] ---
    In anime, we have grown-up reasons,
    like animating it is too much work.
[08:10] ---
    We are going the way of Hell and inhumanity.
[08:13] ---
    Wha?!
[08:13] ---
    Does he have an accelerator device
    in his back tooth or something?!
[08:19] ---
    H-He's fast!
[08:20] ---
    All I can do is block him!
[08:23] ---
    Here goes!
[08:27] ---
    I never imagined that
    I would end up fighting you!
[08:30] ---
    This is truly a trial of love!
[08:32] ---
    But I will defeat you and prove to you
    that I am a superior man!
[08:37] ---
    Azumamiya, I have no idea what
    you're talking about, but...
[08:42] ---
    Keep up that chatter
    and you'll end up biting your tongue.
[08:49] ---
    Head!
[08:57] ---
    That's the student
    council president for you.
[08:59] ---
    The Little Master Azumamiya
    is no match for her.
[09:02] ---
    Of course not.
[09:03] ---
    There's no way Hinagiku would
    lose against a guy like that.
[09:05] ---
    But I wonder how it will go for the butlers.
[09:08] ---
    What?
[09:09] ---
    At the level he's at, will he be
    able to win against Nonohara?
[09:12] ---
    You must be joking!
[09:13] ---
    Are you saying Hayate will lose
    to a butler like that?!
[09:17] ---
    Now, then...
[09:18] ---
    Hayate, how are you...
[09:19] ---
    Safety Shutter!
[09:29] ---
    Hayate!
[09:34] ---
    What the heck was that?
[09:35] ---
    You have to ask? That was
    a super lethal technique, of course.
[09:39] ---
    Huh?!
[09:40] ---
    When you get to be a first-rate butler,
[09:43] ---
    it's only natural that you'd know
    a super lethal technique or two.
[09:46] ---
    In fact, what use are you without it?
[09:48] ---
    Are those like the ridiculously
    complicated moves,
[09:51] ---
    like Ryuko Ranbu and Hyakki Moshuuken?
[09:54] ---
    Those are from video games!
[10:03] ---
    I had heard that the Sanzenin butler
    was a man of ability,
[10:07] ---
    but is this the extent of it?
[10:08] ---
    Amazing! A lethal technique?!
[10:11] ---
    So this is what first-rate
    butlers are capable of?!
[10:13] ---
    But if I lose now, the Miss
    will never practice kendo again!
[10:15] ---
    Are you all right, Hayate?!
[10:18] ---
    Come, I will finish this with the next move.
[10:22] ---
    B-But how can I come up with a technique
[10:24] ---
    that will exceed his lethal technique?
SIGN    Do Not Enter Authorized Personnel Only
[10:53] ---
    Madness!
[10:54] ---
    Besides, in order
    to master a lethal technique,
[10:56] ---
    you need to spend a whole episode on it!
[11:00] ---
    To try to master a lethal
    technique in such a short time...
[11:06] ---
    Hayate, I believe in you!
[11:08] ---
    I just know that you can come up
    with a counter move,
[11:10] ---
    like how Buffaloman turned
    the tables on the Kinniku Buster!
[11:13] ---
    I appreciate your faith,
    but I'm not a superman...
[11:13] ---
    You can do it!
[11:18] ---
    As a butler...
[11:22] ---
    As a butler, if you overlook
    the garbage that is lying around,
[11:26] ---
    you will never get any cleaning done.
[11:30] ---
    The caterpillar alights
    on the green foliage!
[11:32] ---
    That's not it at all...
[11:34] ---
    Here I come.
[11:36] ---
    Lethal...
[11:39] ---
    Garbage that's lying around...
[11:41] ---
    Garbage?!
[11:43] ---
    That's it!
[11:43] ---
    Safety Shutter!
[11:51] ---
    Hayate!
[11:53] ---
    No, it's not! That's...
[11:59] ---
    Wha?! Young Master!
[12:04] ---
    Hayate!
SIGN    Gojuro Kuwabatake
[12:10] ---
    Head!
[12:27] ---
    I lost.
[12:28] ---
    You are not a Sanzenin butler for nothing.
[12:30] ---
    No, not at all. All I did
    was catch you a little off guard.
[12:34] ---
    Seeing the Young Master's
    pitiful, unconscious face,
[12:37] ---
    I would be unable to resist driving
    my lethal technique into him.
[12:39] ---
    It was a good strategy
    that caught me emotionally off guard.
[12:42] ---
    What?!
[12:47] ---
    It was just a simple ninja decoy technique.
[12:49] ---
    A simple...? You know how
    to use the ninja decoy technique?
[12:52] ---
    Then we shall excuse ourselves now.
[12:54] ---
    When we meet next time,
[12:56] ---
    I would like to see you
    with a lethal technique or two.
[13:00] ---
    What?
[13:00] ---
    Then, I will be able to fight
    with you a little more seriously.
[13:09] ---
    So?
[13:10] ---
    Are you at least a bit more
    interested in kendo now, Nagi?
[13:13] ---
    What?!
[13:13] ---
    W-Well, watching you and Hayate fighting,
[13:17] ---
    I did think it was sort of cool...
[13:20] ---
    Miss!
[13:21] ---
    But I have no intention
    of returning to the kendo team.
[13:24] ---
    What?!
[13:25] ---
    I mean, kendo head gear
    absolutely stinks of sweat.
[13:31] ---
    I can't believe people actually
    exercise wearing something like that!
[13:34] ---
    Besides, in kendo mangas,
    the head gear gets in the way
[13:36] ---
    and you can't tell characters
    or their expressions apart.
[13:39] ---
    Don't make fun of kendo!
[13:41] ---
    What did you do that for?!
[13:46] ---
    So, it may be impossible to get
    Nagi back on the kendo team,
[13:50] ---
    but what about you, Hayate?
[13:51] ---
    What?
[13:55] ---
    As a butler, you need
    to master a lethal technique, right?
[13:58] ---
    I wouldn't mind doing the training with you.
[14:00] ---
    Y-Yes, well,
[14:02] ---
    I'm thinking I ought to train
    to master a lethal technique, but...
[14:08] ---
    Hayate, hurry up!
[14:09] ---
    Y-Yes, Miss!
[14:12] ---
    Then, I'm sure you'll have
    lots of training to do,
[14:15] ---
    but once you've mastered it, show me
    your super lethal technique, okay?
[14:19] ---
    C-Certainly.
[14:22] ---
    Was Hinagiku still mad?
[14:25] ---
    Why did she get so mad?
[14:26] ---
    There are some things that are off limits.
[14:32] ---
    She is a long way from
    becoming a sports believer...
[14:36] ---
    Thank you very much, Maria.
[14:40] ---
    To what do I owe this formal thanks?
[14:42] ---
    Well, thanks to you, I'm able to
    experience high school life again,
[14:46] ---
    which I didn't think I would have anymore.
[14:48] ---
    I see. I'm glad for you.
[14:51] ---
    So, what did you think
    of your first day at school?
[14:54] ---
    I used to think that high
    school life wasn't necessary
[14:57] ---
    for me to become a first-rate butler,
[14:59] ---
    but I learned a lot about what I need
    in order to become a first-rate butler!
[15:04] ---
    I-I see...
[15:07] ---
    Hayate, come here for a sec!
[15:09] ---
    Oh, yes, Miss.
[15:14] ---
    How may I help you, Miss?
[15:17] ---
    A-Ahem.
[15:19] ---
    I-It made me happy
    that you fought for me today.
[15:22] ---
    Not at all. I merely did what
    was expected of me as a butler.
[15:25] ---
    Besides, I've now learned that as a butler,
    I need a lethal technique.
[15:29] ---
    Yes, that's the thing!
[15:31] ---
    What?
[15:31] ---
    I thought about it myself,
[15:33] ---
    but you should get magnetic coating
    or open the Hidden Lotus,
[15:36] ---
    or get the Ultra Bracelet
    from Ultra Seven or something.
[15:39] ---
    Th-That's a little...
[15:41] ---
    I'm not a White Demon, nor am I
    a bushy-browed boy with a bowl cut.
[15:45] ---
    To say nothing of how I have no
    friends among the Galactic Surveyors.
[15:48] ---
    Yes, precisely!
[15:50] ---
    Which is why I came to the conclusion
    that you ought to master a lethal technique
[15:53] ---
    through the time-honored method, after all.
[15:55] ---
    Huh?
[15:59] ---
    So, in part to thank you for what
    you did today, I built you this.
[16:04] ---
    Oh!
[16:09] ---
    Th-This isn't what I think it is, is it?
[16:11] ---
    Yes!
[16:12] ---
    When it comes to lethal techniques,
[16:13] ---
    it's got to be the Tiger's
    Cave's special training!
[16:15] ---
    Go give it your best!
[16:16] ---
    You say that, but only those 40
    and older would get that reference...
[16:20] ---
    Meow!
[16:21] ---
    Pipopa, meow!
[16:24] ---
    I knew it'd be you...
[16:25] ---
    I'm not dressed like this
    because I want to be, either!
[16:28] ---
    Being a pet cat is a tough
    position to be in.
[16:30] ---
    Let's get this training started!
[16:33] ---
    You stupid! Quit it!
[16:35] ---
    Don't turn all realistic without warning!
[16:38] ---
    Good! Seeing how he's
    started training right away,
[16:41] ---
    he's definitely happy with it!
[16:43] ---
    Sometimes, the mistress's
    considerate care can be meddlesome.
[16:48] ---
    At any rate, this is how...
[16:49] ---
    ...the poverty-stricken butler's
    first day of school came to a close.
[16:54] ---
    As for next time, he will be battling
    cleaning, laundry, and cooking.
[17:02] ---
    Hah!
[17:04] ---
    Lethal Frying Pan Flip!
[17:10] ---
    Bravo!
[17:14] ---
    Ramen-lover Mr. Koike's song!
    (Ramen daisuki Koike-san no uta.)
[17:17] ---
    If you happen to see Tama, say, "Tama!"
    (Tama-tama Tama ni attara "Tama" tte yonde ne!)
SIGN    Klaus's Hurray for Gluttons!
[17:21] ---
    Klaus's Hurray for Gluttons!
[17:32] ---
    I'm hungry...
[17:36] ---
    All right, I guess
    I'll do some impersonations.
[17:39] ---
    An impression of Jack Bauer.
[17:42] ---
    "It's Season 5!"
[17:44] ---
    An impression of Optimus Prime.
[17:47] ---
    "Autobots, transform!"
[17:51] ---
    An impression of a certain
    foreign film time slot.
[17:54] ---
    "Next time on Sunday Foreign Films..."
[17:58] ---
    An impression of "Sure-Fire Funny Stories".
[18:01] ---
    Sure-Fire Funny Stories!
[18:05] ---
    Now, then...
[18:08] ---
    Ah! Solo word chain game!
[18:11] ---
    Klaus... (Kurausu)
[18:14] ---
    Super-car eraser... (Suupaa-kaa keshigomu)
[18:16] ---
    Muluaka... (Muruaka)
[18:18] ---
    Ka...
SIGN    Klaus's Hurray for Gluttons!
SIGN    The End
SIGN    From the Windows of All the World's Trains
[18:23] ---
    From the Windows of All the World's Trains.
[19:10] ---
    Have we arrived at Rio de Janeiro yet?
SIGN    From the Windows of All the World's Trains
[19:14] ---
    Next time, we will take
    the Marunouchi Line from Ogikubo
SIGN    The End
[19:16] ---
    to the next stop, South Asagaya.
SIGN    Doggie of the °°°
[19:18] ---
    Doggie of the Day.
[19:22] ---
    Our doggie of the day basks comfortably
    in the sun in Nerima Ward, Tokyo.
SIGN    Nerima Ward, Tokyo
SIGN    Tama the Whitetigerneko
[19:28] ---
    Tama the Whitetigerneko.
[19:30] ---
    No, no, even in the most generous of
    terms, you can't call him a doggie!
[19:33] ---
    Hayate!
[19:35] ---
    Hayate! Hayate, let's play!
[19:36] ---
    Q-Quit it!
[19:37] ---
    What game should we play?!
[19:37] ---
    Quit it, Tama!
[19:38] ---
    Um, how about we play...
[19:39] ---
    And that was Tama, who loves to play
    with his master, the butler.
SIGN    Klaus's Exploration of Homes
[19:48] ---
    Today's home is one of the Sanzenin
    household's secondary residences.
SIGN    Nagi Sanzenin - 13 yrs
[19:53] ---
    The family consists of
[19:54] ---
    the young miss, who fully enjoys her life
    as an unproductive member of society
SIGN    Maria the Maid - a fresh-faced 17 yrs
[19:57] ---
    and Maria, the maid, whose hobby
    is to make flower arrangements.
[20:00] ---
    And now, let's go right ahead
    and take a look.
[20:08] ---
    The pillars are fantastic, aren't they?
[20:11] ---
    I see!
[20:13] ---
    Well, this is truly labor intensive
    workmanship. Real materials.
[20:18] ---
    The sense of security that hits you
    the moment you walk in the entrance.
[20:22] ---
    Craftsmanship that you
    can really appreciate.
[20:24] ---
    Ah! Look at this!
[20:27] ---
    A sunny salon!
[20:28] ---
    And a tasteful selection of leafy plants
    placed around the space.
[20:31] ---
    Oh... I have a leafy plant fetish, you see.
[20:37] ---
    What a joy this is!
[20:40] ---
    Beyond the dazzling archway of sunlight,
[20:43] ---
    we arrive at the LDK
    condominium of your dreams.
[20:45] ---
    Next time, we will see a home
    that enjoys comfortable space,
[20:48] ---
    enveloped in soft light.
SIGN    Look forward to next time
[20:50] ---
    Please look forward to it.
SIGN    Yonday
[21:48] ---
    That was fun!
[21:50] ---
    Well, see you again next time.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:13] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:13] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:18] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:18] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:31] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:31] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:38] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:38] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:49] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:49] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:03] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:03] ---
    Stars so beautiful,
    it'll be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Sorry to keep you waiting.
    This is Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:32] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:33] ---
    And Hinagiku is here with us again today.
[23:35] ---
    I'm Hinagiku Katsura. I'm glad to be here.
[23:37] ---
    Hayate, you seem rather happy somehow.
[23:38] ---
    Well, when Hinagiku graces us
    with her presence,
[23:41] ---
    I feel like the anime itself
    reaches different heights.
[23:44] ---
    I don't sleep holding a doll like that.
[23:47] ---
    Hayate, you are mistaken!
[23:49] ---
    What?
[23:49] ---
    The heroine of this anime, you see...
[23:51] ---
    Yes?
[23:51] ---
    ...is you, Hayate!
[23:53] ---
    What?!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    What's wrong, Miss?!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    It seems I lack life experience.
[24:02] ---
    It seems I can't win any manga contests,
[24:04] ---
    because I lack life experience.
[24:06] ---
    I-I see...
[24:07] ---
    In that case, I'll do things
    I don't normally do
[24:09] ---
    and raise my experience level, too!
[24:11] ---
    What?!
[24:12] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    "For You, I Will Mow Them Down
    with Every Ounce of My Being!"
[24:16] ---
    I will now treat you
    to super VIP hospitality!
[24:19] ---
    For You, I Will Mow Them Down
    with Every Ounce of My Being!
[24:19] ---
    Brace yourselves!
[24:21] ---
    If you are not afraid, come at me!

17 - For You, I will Mow Them Down with Every Ounce of My Being!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    Tralala~~ Sploosh!
SIGN    Sploosh
[00:13] ---
    "My name is Britney.
[00:15] ---
    "As you can see, I am a fine,
    totally unremarkable florist.
SIGN    Sploosh!
[00:19] ---
    "Once again, I have followed
    the alluring fragrance of flowers
[00:21] ---
    "and today, I've come all the way
    to the Sea of Japan.
[00:23] ---
    "Listening to the roar
    of the crashing waves,
[00:26] ---
    "I'm reminded of the magical kingdom,
    my homeland, 3-chome in East Nakano.
[00:30] ---
    "Whoops, I just accidentally
    blabbed my secret. Bloody hell.
[00:33] ---
    "I'm sure you've noticed,
[00:35] ---
    "but as you can see, my true identity...
SIGN    End of the Century
    Legend Magical Destroy
SIGN    Rising star
     of the universe
    Nagi Sanzenin
[00:38] ---
    "...is that of a magical girl!"
[00:40] ---
    Today, in commemoration of our 17th episode,
[00:43] ---
    we're going to show you a full
    30 minutes of manga that I drew!
[00:46] ---
    A stunning comic-mation even greater
    than "His and Hers" and "Cat-Eyed Boy"!
[00:50] ---
    You'll see your fill of talent
    that surpasses even that of
[00:52] ---
    the super director of the SOS Brigade...
[00:52] ---
    Please stop!
[00:53] ---
    They'll get the wrong idea
    and think we've been canceled!
[00:55] ---
    Besides, what are we commemorating
    at an odd number like 17?
[00:59] ---
    Darn you! Do not mock 17!
[01:01] ---
    In Episode 17, Amuro steals the Gundam
    and leaves the White Base!
[01:05] ---
    And Captain Okita collapses
    in Episode 17 and has surgery...
[01:07] ---
    W-Well, then,
[01:09] ---
    please enjoy your regularly
    scheduled "Hayate the Combat Butler"!
[01:13] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:16] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:19] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:22] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[01:26] ---
    Yes!
[01:27] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[01:31] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:35] ---
    By the way, there's also a fan service
    scene with Miss Sayla, too!
[01:37] ---
    That's Episode 37!
    Episode 17 was Miss Mirai!
[01:42] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:42] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:49] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:49] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:55] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:55] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:58] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:58] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:03] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:03] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:08] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:08] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:11] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:11] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:16] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:16] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:20] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:20] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:26] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:26] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:33] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:33] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:36] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:36] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:39] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:39] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:45] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:45] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:52] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:52] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:10] ---
    For You, I Will Mow Them Down
    with Every Ounce of My Being!
[03:14] ---
    The girl knows.
[03:18] ---
    That there are some things
    in the world that money can't buy.
SIGN    DOOM
[03:28] ---
    As for what happened, please use your
    imagination based on her expression.
[03:35] ---
    Miss, what happened?!
[03:37] ---
    Wait... Whoa...
[03:41] ---
    Th-This is...
[03:43] ---
    A manga magazine?
[03:45] ---
    It seems I lack life experience.
[03:48] ---
    It seems I can't win any manga contests,
[03:50] ---
    because I lack life experience.
SIGN    End of the Century Legend Magical Destroy
[03:55] ---
    H-Hmm...
[03:57] ---
    Wh-What do you think?
    It's my greatest masterpiece.
[04:00] ---
    It didn't even make it as a finalist.
[04:03] ---
    No matter how you think of it,
    it's messed up, right?
[04:05] ---
    Well, I suppose there may be a niche
    for absurd gag mangas like this...
[04:08] ---
    These are not absurd gags!
[04:10] ---
    Are you saying the grandeur
    of it is lost on you?!
[04:13] ---
    I do sense the grand aura
    of a space cadet...
[04:17] ---
    I swear!
[04:18] ---
    It's because of such bungling judges
[04:20] ---
    that droves of precious, budding
    new authors end up being crushed!
[04:24] ---
    "Ultimately, in order
    to draw entertaining manga,
[04:26] ---
    "one must have rich life experience..."
[04:28] ---
    Like hell new authors can grow
    on vague advice like that!
[04:32] ---
    It's all fine and good
    to tell me this, but...
[04:34] ---
    Well, it's sort of like a chronically
    pathological thing for her,
[04:38] ---
    so please don't pay it any mind.
[04:39] ---
    What?
[04:40] ---
    She draws a manga once every
    several months and submits it.
[04:43] ---
    I had no idea.
[04:47] ---
    What is it?
[04:49] ---
    Oh, no.
[04:50] ---
    I was just thinking that
    if it's for something she loves,
[04:53] ---
    even the Miss will occasionally work hard
    to put heart and soul into something.
[04:56] ---
    Well, not that she ever
    gets anywhere with it.
[05:00] ---
    I see.
[05:01] ---
    I sort of feel a bit sorry for her.
[05:04] ---
    It's not entirely so bad.
[05:06] ---
    It teaches her that there are problems
    that money can't solve,
[05:10] ---
    so I think that it's a good thing.
[05:12] ---
    I see...
[05:15] ---
    It's true, I feel like
    I lack in life experience.
[05:19] ---
    I have few friends, I don't go to school
    much, nor do I play any sports.
[05:23] ---
    And yet, I don't have to
    worry about making a living
[05:25] ---
    and things will work out,
    even if I just laze about every day.
[05:27] ---
    Truly, rushing headlong down the path
    to becoming a useless member of society.
[05:30] ---
    I-It's this privileged environment
    that's at fault to begin with!
[05:34] ---
    I have no experience like Nello
    and Marco, who were super poor!
[05:37] ---
    Or like Sara, who plunged from
    the peak of happiness to rock bottom.
[05:42] ---
    That's why I can't create
    super powerful stories
[05:45] ---
    that can move all of America to tears.
[05:48] ---
    Wait, I know someone who likely
    has abundant life experience.
[05:54] ---
    What? What was I doing
    when I was around 13 years old?
[05:58] ---
    That's right!
[05:59] ---
    I want to know how different
    we are in life experience.
[06:03] ---
    Hmm, when I was around 13 years old?
[06:06] ---
    Let me think. At that time,
    I was probably...
[06:09] ---
    ...doing things like working
    as a professional mahjong bouncer.
[06:11] ---
    Huh?
[06:12] ---
    Professional mahjong bouncer...
[06:14] ---
    A job like that of a bodyguard,
    who plays mahjong to repel
SIGN    Murmur... Murmur...
[06:16] ---
    the "very generous people" who come
    to pick fights with the establishment.
[06:20] ---
    It is a dangerous occupation,
    as you absolutely cannot lose.
[06:27] ---
    Isn't that like, incredibly dangerous?
[06:30] ---
    It wasn't that big a deal.
[06:32] ---
    I was a strong player and
    I was also good at cheating, after all.
[06:35] ---
    The difference in life
    experience is great indeed!
[06:38] ---
    But I think you have abundant
    life experience, too, Miss.
[06:42] ---
    What?
[06:43] ---
    You're only 13, but you've skipped
    grades to be in high school,
[06:46] ---
    and you live in this great big mansion.
[06:48] ---
    These aren't experiences
    you can come by so easily.
[06:51] ---
    Y-You think so?
[06:53] ---
    Incidentally, what else were you doing?
[06:56] ---
    Let me think. What else?
[06:58] ---
    I used to get award money
    by winning new manga author contests.
[07:02] ---
    So, just as I expected,
[07:03] ---
    the difference in experience
    is the decisive different in firepower!
[07:06] ---
    Miss?
[07:08] ---
    In that case, I'll do things
    I don't normally do
[07:10] ---
    and raise my experience level, too!
[07:12] ---
    Do things you don't normally do
    and raise your experience level?!
[07:14] ---
    That's the spirit, Miss!
[07:16] ---
    Use this as your springboard
    to say good-bye to your reclusive life
[07:19] ---
    and leap out into the world outside!
[07:21] ---
    Rejected!
[07:22] ---
    What?!
[07:24] ---
    The things to be found outside the residence
[07:25] ---
    will amount to no more
    experience than Slimes!
[07:28] ---
    What I desire is the kind of experience
    you get from Liquid Metal Slimes!
[07:31] ---
    I see...
[07:32] ---
    That's why, as the top thing
    that I ordinarily don't do,
[07:35] ---
    I will help Maria with her work!
[07:40] ---
    What? You're going to help me?
[07:43] ---
    Yes. I will be of great use to you!
[07:46] ---
    Ask me to do whatever you want!
[07:47] ---
    Hayate!
[07:49] ---
    Well, the Miss is finally motivated
    to take the initiative, so...
[07:53] ---
    Now, first things first,
    I'll do what you always do
[07:56] ---
    and begin by helping you
    clean the residence.
[07:58] ---
    Oh, wait, Nagi!
[07:59] ---
    Here goes! Zephyrus Broom!
[08:03] ---
    Oh?
[08:04] ---
    That is not the yell used
    for when you clean!
[08:07] ---
    R-Right. I messed up there a bit.
[08:10] ---
    But I'll manage somehow next time...
[08:15] ---
    Take that!
[08:17] ---
    Hayate!
[08:20] ---
    Miss! Wait! Stop!
[08:22] ---
    Hayate, there definitely are things
    you need to experience to know.
[08:25] ---
    What might that be?
[08:28] ---
    Cleaning makes a mess.
[08:30] ---
    A rare experience...
[08:33] ---
    Yes, I've mastered cleaning now.
[08:35] ---
    Come, we're moving on to the next thing!
[08:36] ---
    Wait, Miss!
[08:38] ---
    All right! Next up,
    I'm going to master shopping!
[08:41] ---
    Shopping?
[08:42] ---
    But there are things in this world
    that cannot be bought online
[08:45] ---
    or on Yahoo Auction, you know.
[08:47] ---
    Don't take me for a fool!
[08:48] ---
    I'm going out to town
    to run a proper errand!
[08:57] ---
    Th-There are too many things...
[08:58] ---
    This store has the greatest selection
    of goods in this area, after all.
[09:02] ---
    If the equipment store
    in a role playing game was like this,
[09:04] ---
    you wouldn't know what to buy anymore!
[09:06] ---
    For starters, check
    the freshness and the price.
[09:09] ---
    Also, look for where it's from and
    if possible, who the producer is.
[09:12] ---
    I have no need of such complicated commands.
[09:13] ---
    Oh, this is...
[09:16] ---
    Hey, clerk.
[09:18] ---
    Yes?
[09:22] ---
    I've learned yet another
    thing through experience.
[09:25] ---
    What is it this time?
SIGN    Sold to Ms. Sanzenin
[09:27] ---
    If you go shopping,
    the store ceases to exist.
[09:30] ---
    I didn't know that before today, either.
[09:32] ---
    All right, next, we'll go back
    and tidy up the storehouse.
[09:35] ---
    You're still going to do more?!
[09:40] ---
    Wow, it looks like the legendary
    Ark could be hidden in here.
[09:45] ---
    The majority of what's in here
    is pretty much like garbage.
[09:48] ---
    Please! I'm sure they're
    all valuable works of art.
[09:54] ---
    Th-This is...!
[10:00] ---
    See? I find it hard to believe that
    such ugly portraits have any value.
[10:05] ---
    True...
[10:06] ---
    Yah!
SIGN    Yah
[10:08] ---
    Wh-Who's there?!
[10:10] ---
    That's Rodin's "The Thinker"!
[10:13] ---
    No, it's not! Head Butler,
    what are you doing here?!
[10:17] ---
    This is my relaxation spot.
[10:21] ---
    When I have few scenes, I come here
    to immerse myself in the world of art
[10:24] ---
    and to reinvigorate myself.
[10:26] ---
    No wonder we don't see you around much.
[10:34] ---
    Okay, onto the next thing!
[10:36] ---
    Please wait for me, Miss!
[10:38] ---
    M-Miss, let me out!
[10:41] ---
    It's dark! It's scary!
SIGN    Hayate the Combat Butler!
[10:46] ---
    The cat laid down.
    (Neko ga nekoronda.)
[10:50] ---
    Harumph! It'll be fine!
    (Dafunda! Daijoubu da!)
[10:53] ---
    Say, Hayate, what should I do next?
[10:55] ---
    Let me think... I suppose that leaves
    things like showing hospitality...
[10:59] ---
    Showing hospitality? All right!
[11:00] ---
    Oh, Miss!
[11:02] ---
    Please wait! We don't
    even have any visitors.
[11:07] ---
    Oh, dear, oh, dear...
[11:08] ---
    Isumi...?
[11:09] ---
    Isumi!
[11:11] ---
    Oh, Nagi... my dear Hayate...
[11:13] ---
    What are you doing out here?
[11:16] ---
    So this was your home.
[11:19] ---
    No wonder things looked so familiar.
[11:22] ---
    What?
[11:23] ---
    The truth is, I was studying
    in my room until just earlier, but...
[11:30] ---
    My eraser fell from the desk and...
[11:35] ---
    Wait for me!
[11:38] ---
    I was looking for it in my yard
[11:41] ---
    and before I knew it,
    I had wandered over here.
[11:44] ---
    You continue to get lost in the most
    spectacularly original ways.
[11:48] ---
    Or rather, I wonder if there's a wormhole
    that connects to our yard.
[11:52] ---
    But you've appeared at the perfect moment!
[11:59] ---
    I will now treat you
    to super VIP hospitality!
[12:03] ---
    I wonder if the Miss will be all right.
[12:05] ---
    You made the tea for me, Nagi?
[12:08] ---
    Yes!
[12:09] ---
    I took all the high end
    tea leaves in the kitchen
[12:11] ---
    and threw them in one after another
    to make a Nagi Sanzenin original,
[12:14] ---
    the Royal Premium Hyper-Gigamax
    Blend, so it'll be crazy good!
[12:18] ---
    Oh! The cup is dirty!
[12:21] ---
    Pardon me, I'll go get another one!
[12:23] ---
    Wait... Hayate?
[12:35] ---
    A blend of Darjeeling, Blue
    Mountain coffee, and brown rice tea!
[12:38] ---
    On top of which, I can taste a hint
    of Baby Star Ramen for some reason!
[12:41] ---
    We can't possibly serve such an
    "Oh! My Konbu Seaweed!" sort of tea.
[12:49] ---
    H-How it is?
[12:52] ---
    It is very delicious, Nagi.
[12:54] ---
    R-Really?!
[12:57] ---
    Hayate, it seems I have a talent
    for showing hospitality!
[13:01] ---
    I am happy for you, Miss.
[13:02] ---
    All right! I'll practice hospitality
    on an even greater scale
[13:05] ---
    and increase my experience level!
[13:07] ---
    What?!
SIGN    Hayate
[13:10] ---
    Please enjoy.
[13:12] ---
    Th-Thank you.
[13:14] ---
    1000 yen for a fried rice
    omelette with lettering.
[13:16] ---
    If I eat this, will I become
    a full-fledged refined young lady, too?
[13:41] ---
    Everyone, it's good of you to come.
[13:43] ---
    Nagi?
[13:44] ---
    What's with yer getup?
[13:46] ---
    It's the worst-looking
    cosplay in the universe.
[13:48] ---
    This is not cosplaying!
    This is life experience!
[13:51] ---
    Huh?
[13:53] ---
    Hey, what's this 'bout life experience?
[13:56] ---
    The thing is, she said she wanted
    to do things she normally doesn't
[13:58] ---
    to increase her experience level.
[14:02] ---
    I will now put my talent
    for hospitality on full display for you!
[14:06] ---
    I'll cook you a dish that's so delicious,
    it'll make you melt down to the core!
[14:10] ---
    Wait, she's gonna start makin' it now?!
[14:13] ---
    Here goes Nagi!
[14:16] ---
    Hey, can she really do this?
[14:18] ---
    Pardon me, I must go see to something!
[14:32] ---
    Sneak, sneak, sneak, sneak, sneak.
[14:39] ---
    It tastes ultra bad!
[14:40] ---
    I-If we serve this to the guests,
    the Miss will end up being hurt!
[14:45] ---
    I cannot leave things like this!
[14:54] ---
    I-It's good!
[14:55] ---
    This is good!
[14:57] ---
    You are right, Young Sir.
[14:58] ---
    A fusion of full-bodied flavor,
    richness, and simplicity!
[15:01] ---
    What depth there is to this flavor!
[15:03] ---
    A mellow aroma like the land
    bursting forth with life!
[15:05] ---
    A mild mouth-feel, similar
    to the embrace of the great wide ocean!
[15:09] ---
    The ingredients result
    in a nuclear reaction in your mouth
[15:12] ---
    and create a Big Bang of taste!
[15:15] ---
    Th-This is...!
[15:18] ---
    This is splendid!
[15:20] ---
    How splendid!
[15:23] ---
    It's YUMMY!
[15:35] ---
    It's yummy!
[15:39] ---
    It's delicious.
[15:42] ---
    Come on, now! Bring on the seconds!
[15:46] ---
    Katsy, no going on a rampage!
[15:48] ---
    You are so much trouble!
[15:50] ---
    Bring on the sake, too!
[15:53] ---
    And while you're at it, bring me money, too!
[15:55] ---
    Hayate, everyone's enjoying the dish I made!
[15:59] ---
    I'm happy for you, Miss.
[16:04] ---
    Thank you for the meal, Hayate.
[16:06] ---
    What?!
[16:07] ---
    You're the one who really
    cooked this, right?
[16:12] ---
    Looks like I hit it on the nose.
    It shows on your face so easily.
[16:15] ---
    Th-This has to be a secret from the Miss!
[16:18] ---
    I know.
[16:19] ---
    It must be tough being a butler.
[16:21] ---
    You have to work to make sure your
    mistress doesn't get embarrassed.
[16:24] ---
    Nagi, that was delicious!
[16:26] ---
    R-Right.
[16:27] ---
    Your hospitality was quite good.
[16:28] ---
    Is that right?
[16:29] ---
    I'm glad I came.
[16:51] ---
    Say, Hayate...
[16:53] ---
    Yes?
[16:54] ---
    I feel like I understand a bit
    of how you and Maria feel now.
[16:57] ---
    What?
[16:59] ---
    It's nice to do something for other people.
[17:02] ---
    I also want lots of people to read my manga
[17:04] ---
    and enjoy it like these people did.
[17:08] ---
    Miss...
[17:14] ---
    The truth is the Miss is a good kid.
[17:17] ---
    I have to continue
    to protect her innocent spirit.
[17:21] ---
    Where's my seconds?!
[17:23] ---
    Bring me my seconds or else!
[17:26] ---
    Oh? Miss Katsura,
    you still hadn't gone home?
[17:30] ---
    This smell!
[17:31] ---
    Ta-da!
[17:33] ---
    I've discovered my seconds!
[17:35] ---
    Oh! I went to such trouble to hide it!
[17:48] ---
    Miss Katsura?!
[17:53] ---
    Miss Katsura, please get a hold of yourself!
[17:55] ---
    Hayate.
[17:58] ---
    M-Miss...
[18:00] ---
    Why is my dish sitting here, untouched?
[18:04] ---
    What? O-Oh, come on!
[18:06] ---
    Those people ate every
    last bit of your dish earlier!
[18:10] ---
    This is a failed dish that I made...
[18:12] ---
    Liar!
[18:13] ---
    Then what about my signature there?!
SIGN    By Nagi Sanzenin
[18:18] ---
    What?! Why did you have
    to sign it like a manga?!
[18:21] ---
    So what everyone ate earlier was
    a dish that you made, wasn't it?!
[18:24] ---
    Uh, um, that is...
[18:28] ---
    So it is true.
[18:30] ---
    Could it be that I haven't been of any use?
[18:33] ---
    What?
[18:34] ---
    Was I of no use to you or Maria
    or anyone from the beginning?
[18:39] ---
    No, that is hardly the case!
[18:41] ---
    How do I put this? Everyone has
    their strengths and weaknesses,
[18:43] ---
    and not everything will go their way.
[18:47] ---
    In other words, you mean to say...
[18:49] ---
    ...that I may not have
    the talent to draw manga?
[18:52] ---
    What?! No, I never...
[18:54] ---
    It's not as if that thought
    never crossed my mind!
[18:57] ---
    It's just possible...
[18:58] ---
    It's just possible, that there's
    a one in a million chance...
[19:00] ---
    A one in a billion chance...
[19:01] ---
    A chance as unlikely
    as the Earth exploding...
[19:06] ---
    that I can't win those contests
    because I don't have the talent for it.
[19:11] ---
    Miss...
[19:13] ---
    Miss!
[19:17] ---
    I'm just... I'm just...
[19:23] ---
    Miss!
[19:27] ---
    Are you all right, Miss?
[19:29] ---
    Leave me alone.
[19:31] ---
    I have no talent and
    I'm not much help to anyone...
[19:35] ---
    Not to worry.
[19:36] ---
    Please take a look!
[19:38] ---
    Thanks to all your help,
[19:40] ---
    those two both have such
    satisfied looks on their faces.
SIGN    Dazed~~
[19:43] ---
    Don't their eyes seem lifeless?
[19:45] ---
    What shall we do about the cleaning?
[19:46] ---
    This was my chance to get screen time.
[19:51] ---
    You think I have no talent, too, don't you?
[19:54] ---
    What?!
[19:55] ---
    You do, don't you?!
[19:56] ---
    You've won manga contests and
    in your eyes, I have no talent for it.
[19:59] ---
    That's what you want to say, right?!
[20:03] ---
    You do have talent, Miss.
[20:06] ---
    What?
[20:07] ---
    I mean, you've written many works
    of manga and submitted them, right?
[20:11] ---
    Yes...
[20:12] ---
    There are a lot of people who never
    even finish drawing one work
[20:15] ---
    and fail to see the project through.
[20:18] ---
    But when it comes to something you love,
[20:21] ---
    you try to do your best
    without losing heart.
[20:23] ---
    You have a talent called passion!
[20:26] ---
    A talent called passion?
[20:28] ---
    Yes, I guarantee it.
[20:32] ---
    I understand, Hayate!
[20:33] ---
    I'll try and take a chance on my passion!
[20:36] ---
    That's the spirit, Miss!
[20:38] ---
    Besides, it's possible that your manga
    are just too sophisticated.
[20:44] ---
    Too sophisticated?
[20:45] ---
    Yes!
[20:47] ---
    Perhaps the richness
    of your experiences is too great
[20:49] ---
    for people to easily appreciate
    how interesting your work is.
[20:51] ---
    Th-That makes sense!
[20:53] ---
    So, if I tone things down a bit...
[20:55] ---
    That's right! Then next time,
    you will surely win!
[20:59] ---
    All right! Then I guess
    I'll work hard at it one more time!
[21:02] ---
    Please do, Miss!
[21:09] ---
    "Black Sega Saturn?!"
[21:11] ---
    "That's the surefire way to save
    Earth in the 8th dimension.
[21:14] ---
    "All that remains is to win
    in the music contest.
[21:16] ---
    "The 4th Space God Communication
    Ticket Vending Vessel we need for that
[21:19] ---
    "has already been successfully
    bid on in Yahoo Auctions."
[21:21] ---
    Man, it's as sophisticated as ever...
[21:25] ---
    The next new author award
    is as good as mine now.
[21:28] ---
    Y-Yes...
[21:30] ---
    Thus, the butler-in-debt's life
    experience and suffering continue.
[21:34] ---
    Next time, a dragon and a hamster
    will meet in the clash of the century!
[21:38] ---
    Or so we thought, but due to
    the convenience of the rotation,
[21:41] ---
    we have a swimsuit episode.
SIGN    Notebook
SIGN    Nagi
[21:44] ---
    So exciting, so thrilling.
[21:46] ---
    That is my Nagi.
[21:49] ---
    That cured the stiffness in my shoulders.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful,
    it'll be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    SIGN: Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Hello, I'm Yukiji Katsura.
[23:32] ---
    Miss Katsura, what are you doing here?!
[23:35] ---
    Well, I figured I possess
    greater adult charms than Hinagiku
[23:37] ---
    and that people might enjoy
    my appearance somewhat more.
[23:40] ---
    I don't know about that...
[23:41] ---
    Besides, the boys and girls who are fans
    of Hinagiku won't buy the DVDs!
[23:45] ---
    You really should target single men over 20!
[23:47] ---
    Miss Katsura, advertising
    within the show is forbidden!
[23:49] ---
    How naïve of you, Ayasaki!
[23:50] ---
    I want people to buy the "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" DVDs...
[23:53] ---
    You're panicking way too much, Ayasaki.
[23:54] ---
    Hey, Sis!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    Next time, it's the summer festival,
[23:58] ---
    the highly anticipated swimsuit episode!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    A luxury resort island in the tropics,
[24:02] ---
    Hakuou Island and those
    who go there see... see... see...!
[24:06] ---
    Welcome to Hakuou Island.
[24:08] ---
    I am this island's
    in-house butler and manager,
[24:11] ---
    Schmidt Offenbach.
[24:13] ---
    I shall take it upon myself to create
    happy summer memories for you.
[24:17] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:18] ---
    "The Rare Cards Are Swimsuits".
[24:19] ---
    The Rare Cards Are Swimsuits
[24:20] ---
    I will be talking more than usual as well.
[24:22] ---
    Now, how to fight through this...

18 - The Rare Cards Are Swimsuits

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
SIGN    Payday!!
SIGN    Seaside Camp
[00:18] ---
    For seaside camp at Hakuou Academy,
[00:22] ---
    they take a private jet.
[00:35] ---
    With her fear of flying,
    Hinagiku does not participate.
[00:38] ---
    But you mustn't panic.
    Don't change the channel.
[00:43] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:46] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:49] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[00:52] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[00:56] ---
    Yes!
[00:57] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[01:01] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:05] ---
    What's this? We're suddenly
    on a summer break episode?
[01:08] ---
    It seems, due to rotation issues,
[01:09] ---
    Episode 18 and 20 were
    swapped at the last minute.
[01:12] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:12] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:19] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:19] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:25] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:25] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:28] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:28] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:33] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:33] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:38] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:38] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:41] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:41] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:46] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:46] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:50] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:50] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[01:56] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[01:56] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:03] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:03] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:06] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:06] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:09] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:09] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:15] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:15] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:22] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:22] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:41] ---
    The Rare Cards Are Swimsuits
[02:46] ---
    The number of participants
    is small for seaside camp.
[02:49] ---
    Well, now, that's because the fee
    to participate is insanely expensive.
[02:53] ---
    It is not for the convenience
    of anime production.
[02:55] ---
    And for Hayate,
    this is his first plane ride.
[02:59] ---
    But you know, he once rode
    in a chopper, didn't he?
[03:01] ---
    Oh, well...
[03:11] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[03:22] ---
    Wow, it's so pretty!
[03:24] ---
    What is?
[03:25] ---
    Kumo-umi (cloud sea)!
[03:27] ---
    Oh-ho!
[03:28] ---
    Katsy, why don't you come look
    at the kumo-umi with us?
[03:31] ---
    "Unkai".
[03:32] ---
    Unkai?!
[03:34] ---
    Written as "sea of clouds",
    it's read as "unkai".
[03:39] ---
    Once summer break's over,
    I'm putting it on the kanji test.
[03:42] ---
    Crushed!
[03:44] ---
    Unkai. Unkai. Unkai. Unkai. Unkai.
[03:47] ---
    Little Master Taiga.
[03:51] ---
    Little Master Taiga.
[04:02] ---
    I am thirsty.
[04:04] ---
    I-Is cola okay?
[04:06] ---
    Yes.
[04:06] ---
    G-Got it.
[04:10] ---
    H-Himuro...
[04:15] ---
    It's cold and delicious.
[04:23] ---
    Seconds, please.
[04:24] ---
    Oh, sure.
[04:29] ---
    Nonohara, could I sit down now?
[04:31] ---
    Young Master, I told you, did I not?
[04:35] ---
    You did.
[04:36] ---
    And what did I say?
[04:37] ---
    The best way to prevent
    blood clots is to run.
[04:40] ---
    One more time.
[04:41] ---
    The best way to prevent
    blood clots is to run!
[04:44] ---
    Then run, damn you!
[04:49] ---
    Nonohara, keep it down.
[04:53] ---
    Yes, ma'am.
[04:54] ---
    Miss, thank you for paying
    the fee for seaside camp...
SIGN    Air Sickness Bag
[05:01] ---
    Hayate, I think it'd be better
[05:03] ---
    if you didn't try to thank me
    for paying while you're airsick.
[05:06] ---
    Pardon me...
[05:12] ---
    A luxury resort island
    with white sand beaches,
[05:14] ---
    floating in the blue seas of the tropics.
[05:17] ---
    That is Hakuou Island.
[05:18] ---
    The Hakuou Academy's island used
    exclusively for its seaside camp.
[05:34] ---
    We're here!
[05:34] ---
    Make sure you follow me!
[05:38] ---
    There!
[05:39] ---
    Come on, get on already.
[05:40] ---
    Up we go.
[05:41] ---
    And now, to your right, you will see...
[05:47] ---
    I feel like we got some
    irrelevant images in there...
[05:50] ---
    The screen capture people certainly
    won't be able to let their guards down.
[05:52] ---
    Huh?
[06:03] ---
    Welcome to Hakuou Island,
    Hakuou Academy's island
[06:06] ---
    used exclusively for its seaside camp.
[06:08] ---
    Who are you?
[06:09] ---
    Pardon me.
[06:11] ---
    Installed here just this year,
[06:13] ---
    I am Hakuou Island's in-house butler
    and manager, Schmidt Offenbach.
[06:17] ---
    Please call me Schmidt.
[06:19] ---
    Oh, I didn't know.
[06:21] ---
    Yes, and to make this
    a happy summer break memory,
[06:25] ---
    I shall work hard to create for you.
[06:27] ---
    Then we'll place ourselves in your hands.
[06:30] ---
    We're in your hands!
[06:31] ---
    Then let me show you
    to your rooms right away.
SIGN    The Avarice Room
SIGN    The Simpleton Room
[06:39] ---
    It looks like we're the only
    ones assigned 3 to a room.
[06:42] ---
    Is that because we're underachievers?!
[06:44] ---
    I doubt that, but...
SIGN    Can't show you!
[06:49] ---
    Say, Himuro, which bed do you want?
SIGN    The Fortitude Room
[06:59] ---
    Man, that was heavy!
[07:03] ---
    Young Master.
[07:04] ---
    Not heavy! Not heavy! Not heavy at all!
SIGN    The Social Recluse Room
[07:10] ---
    The main room is yours, Miss.
[07:13] ---
    Klaus and I will be in the guest room.
[07:15] ---
    Then, I will see you later.
[07:19] ---
    I wouldn't have minded
    being in the same room...
[07:22] ---
    Everyone change into your swimwear!
    Assemble by the pool!
SIGN    SIGN: Taiga
SIGN    SIGN: Nagi
SIGN    SIGN: Izumi
SIGN    SIGN: Risa
[07:35] ---
    Before we go swim in the ocean,
[07:37] ---
    we will practice swimming in this pool.
[07:39] ---
    We'll start with some stretching!
[08:03] ---
    Okay, then I think it's time
    to get into the pool...
[08:06] ---
    Thank you for waiting!
[08:08] ---
    What?!
[08:09] ---
    Schmidt, what the hell is that?!
[08:12] ---
    A synchronized swimming puppeteer machine!
[08:16] ---
    A synchronized swimming puppeteer machine?
[08:19] ---
    Yay!
[08:23] ---
    Then I shall waste no time...
[08:25] ---
    Push.
[08:27] ---
    Zambot Moon Attack!
[08:39] ---
    Hey, why is he in the foreground?!
[08:43] ---
    Hey, you! What do you think
    you're doing to the Miss?!
[08:49] ---
    Oh, no, this is one of the attractions
    for creating happy memories.
[08:53] ---
    Please watch for a while.
[08:55] ---
    Huh?
[08:56] ---
    Uh, okay...
[08:57] ---
    Start the music!
[09:00] ---
    The neverending blue sky
[09:06] ---
    With a heart and mind fresh as can be
[09:06] ---
    Schmidt! Stop this!
[09:09] ---
    How is this going to make
    for happy memories?!
[09:16] ---
    H-Himuro!
[09:18] ---
    Power of Flower
[09:18] ---
    Don't worry about me!
[09:20] ---
    An indomitable spirit!
[09:24] ---
    Watch me from where you are!
[09:25] ---
    Nonohara, h-help!
[09:27] ---
    Power of Flower
[09:28] ---
    Young Master,
[09:29] ---
    I do not recall raising you to be so weak!
[09:31] ---
    Y-Yes, sir!
[09:33] ---
    Power of Flower
[09:35] ---
    Miss, are you all right?!
[09:36] ---
    I may be small now
[09:37] ---
    Yeah, I'm managing somehow.
[09:39] ---
    But that butler named Schmidt...
[09:40] ---
    But I'll reach high and look at the future
[09:41] ---
    He said he would have us make
    happy summer break memories,
[09:45] ---
    but he's the one enjoying himself!
[09:46] ---
    Powerful Flower
[09:46] ---
    Yes, I think so, too.
[09:48] ---
    And someday, even that bud
[09:52] ---
    Wh-What are you doing?!
[09:53] ---
    Will bloom large right
    in the middle of your heart
[09:55] ---
    Please create happy summer break
    memories with your mistress.
[09:59] ---
    And now, for the finale... Push.
[10:00] ---
    Power of Flower
[10:15] ---
    Bravo! Bravo! Bravo! Bravo!
SIGN    Hakuou
[10:35] ---
    Were you able to make some happy memories?
[10:41] ---
    Like hell we could've!
[10:48] ---
    It is noon. That was the lunch bell.
[10:53] ---
    A luxurious barbeque has been prepared
    at the beachside restaurant.
[10:56] ---
    All right!
[10:57] ---
    Katsy, you can punch Schmidt after lunch.
[11:00] ---
    True.
[11:02] ---
    However, before that...
[11:09] ---
    Having lunch in your school
    swimwear would be unfortunate,
[11:12] ---
    so I have prepared
    fabulous swimwear for you!
[11:18] ---
    I'm taking this!
[11:19] ---
    I shall go with this one.
[11:20] ---
    Hmm, then I'll pick this one.
[11:22] ---
    However, I shall take the liberty
    of creating the selections for you.
[11:26] ---
    What?
[11:28] ---
    Please leave the changing to me as well.
[11:31] ---
    What?!
[11:32] ---
    This is not Lancelot!
[11:43] ---
    As I thought, he's the one enjoying this.
[11:46] ---
    He is enjoying himself far too much.
[11:51] ---
    Is "daidai-iro (orange)" orange?
    (Daidai-iro tte orenji?)
[11:55] ---
    Think about the answer yourself.
    (Jibun de kangaenasai)
[11:59] ---
    Izumi Segawa.
[12:03] ---
    Miki Hanabishi.
[12:08] ---
    Risa Asakaze.
[12:12] ---
    Yukiji Katsura.
[12:17] ---
    Miss Nagi Sanzenin.
[12:22] ---
    And Young Master Taiga Ohkouchi.
[12:27] ---
    Hey, now, why are you finishing up with him?
[12:29] ---
    No matter how you look at it,
    you're panning way too much!
[12:32] ---
    And so, here they are at lunch time.
[12:36] ---
    This bikini...
[12:38] ---
    Yes, this is eros.
[12:41] ---
    Schmidt's sensibilities are a bit odd.
[12:44] ---
    You think so? I rather like it.
[12:48] ---
    Ladies and gentlemen,
[12:50] ---
    in order to make your seaside
    camp lunch a happy memory,
[12:53] ---
    I have taken the liberty
    of preparing this for you.
[12:56] ---
    Create.
[12:57] ---
    It looks like he might be up
    to something again.
[13:00] ---
    No, surely not...
[13:02] ---
    Eating a live alligator!
[13:06] ---
    Naturally, it is still alive. Create.
[13:18] ---
    Right around when hell was
    breaking loose on Hakuou Island,
[13:21] ---
    Isumi was...
[13:22] ---
    ...trying to get to the seaside camp
    and had gotten lost again.
[13:33] ---
    Sniff, sniff.
[13:35] ---
    Woof, woof.
[13:36] ---
    Peter! Come over here!
    There's someone buried here!
[13:41] ---
    We have to let Uncle know!
[13:43] ---
    Meanwhile, Hinagiku was...
[13:44] ---
    ...fully enjoying a day off in the city.
[13:47] ---
    Tres bien.
[13:49] ---
    All right! Today, let's do
    a TurboGrafx challenge in Ikebukuro!
[13:55] ---
    Oh, you there, miss!
[13:57] ---
    Huh? Me?
SIGN    Can't show you!
[14:05] ---
    You're good at this, miss!
[14:07] ---
    Darn you little...!
[14:08] ---
    Well, this is a highly
    technologically advanced program.
[14:12] ---
    It's pushing the limits of the hardware.
[14:14] ---
    I see.
[14:22] ---
    After rampaging its heart out,
[14:24] ---
    Mr. Alligator went "see
    you later" back to nature.
[14:28] ---
    Hayate and the others
    learned how precious life is.
[14:31] ---
    Humans. Alligator. Coral. Seagulls.
[14:33] ---
    They are all invaluable members
    and their fellows of Spaceship Earth.
[14:38] ---
    I wish you well, Alligator!
[14:40] ---
    Don't ever get caught by humans again!
[14:43] ---
    Find a nice bride and raise
    a warm alligator family!
[14:49] ---
    When the families meet, make
    sure to do it at your bride's home!
[14:50] ---
    Yum! It was just so yum!
SIGN    °This is in Tigerese.
[14:53] ---
    I can't eat any more!
[14:54] ---
    But I still want to have it again!
[14:57] ---
    After lunch, it's free time.
[15:00] ---
    Every conceivable kind of marine sport
    was being created for them.
[15:06] ---
    Izumi Segawa, Miki Hanabishi,
    and Risa Asakaze
[15:09] ---
    encountered the brilliantly
    blue sea on Hakuou Island.
[15:17] ---
    They encountered...
[15:22] ---
    Oh, they encountered...
[15:28] ---
    Oh, they so encountered...
[15:32] ---
    Head!
[15:35] ---
    Hinagiku Katsura in "Delineating
    the Passionate World", coming up next!
SIGN    Coming Up Next
[15:46] ---
    Aren't you going to play around, Miss?
[15:52] ---
    I enjoy spending time like this the best.
[16:08] ---
    I have brought you a drink.
[16:11] ---
    Thanks. Create.
[16:15] ---
    Merci. Create.
[16:18] ---
    He's a good butler
    when he's not up to anything...
[16:34] ---
    What?
[16:39] ---
    Ooh! This is good stuff!
SIGN    Tail Fin
SIGN    Dark Meat
SIGN    You Are Here
SIGN    Hyakujou (stomach)
SIGN    Saezuri (tongue)
[16:46] ---
    What do you think?
[16:49] ---
    Of what?!
[16:50] ---
    I will now have you enjoy
    a wonderful deep sea outing.
[16:54] ---
    But we can't see anything.
[16:56] ---
    Create...
[16:58] ---
    Don't try to gloss it over!
[17:00] ---
    This must be Diana's doing.
[17:02] ---
    Little Master?
[17:11] ---
    Let's walk.
[17:12] ---
    Yes, Miss.
[17:15] ---
    And thus, the time for supper came to pass.
[17:18] ---
    Meals at hotels are apparently luxurious,
[17:21] ---
    but that has nothing to do with her.
[17:26] ---
    C-Camp... Ranchu goldfish...
[17:30] ---
    F-First kiss?!
[17:33] ---
    Dinner at the Hakuou Academy's
    seaside camp was a formal affair.
[17:43] ---
    To the Hakuou Academy's seaside camp!
[17:47] ---
    Create!
[17:55] ---
    Oh? You seem rather glum...
[18:00] ---
    I don't want a seaside camp like this!
[18:04] ---
    Me, neither.
[18:05] ---
    I want to go home!
[18:08] ---
    We're sick of this seaside camp, too.
[18:17] ---
    Idiot Trio...
[18:18] ---
    Idiot Trio?!
[18:20] ---
    Oh, sorry.
[18:21] ---
    It's just like the three girls say.
[18:24] ---
    Schmidt, we don't want to be
    your entertainment any longer!
[18:27] ---
    Miss Katsura, with all due respect,
[18:29] ---
    I am merely exerting myself so that
    you may create this seaside camp
[18:33] ---
    to be a happy summer break memory.
[18:36] ---
    And your exertions are a nuisance.
[18:38] ---
    Master Himuro.
[18:40] ---
    Schmidt, your meddlesome way isn't good
    for the Young Master's education.
[18:43] ---
    You, too, Master Nonohara?
[18:45] ---
    Miss...
[18:47] ---
    If everyone wants to go home, I'll go, too.
[18:50] ---
    Then, shall we go home?
[18:52] ---
    Oh, put the leftovers in tupperwares,
    okay? I'll be taking it with me.
[18:55] ---
    Not so fast.
[18:57] ---
    Schmidt.
[18:59] ---
    Move aside.
[19:03] ---
    When it comes to seaside camp
    during summer break,
[19:06] ---
    you must have a test of courage at night!
[19:08] ---
    In order for this to be a happy
    summer break memory for you all,
[19:11] ---
    I have had these people assemble
    from all over the world!
[19:20] ---
    The fun is only beginning!
[19:23] ---
    It's show time!
[19:29] ---
    Miss!
[19:33] ---
    Miss!
[19:35] ---
    Miss!
[19:37] ---
    Miss!
[19:39] ---
    Hayate fought valiantly to protect Nagi.
[19:45] ---
    I-I'm counting on you, Nonohara!
[19:47] ---
    Take that.
[19:51] ---
    Nonohara had Azumamiya fight.
[19:57] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
[20:00] ---
    Taiga protected Himuro.
SIGN    Freezing Killer Jet
[20:08] ---
    Klaus sprayed them with insecticide!
[20:11] ---
    They often appear during the summer.
[20:14] ---
    Tama set up a mosquito coil!
[20:19] ---
    Create happy memories!
[20:25] ---
    Like hell we could!
[20:28] ---
    Everyone, we're going home!
[20:32] ---
    Is everyone here?
[20:33] ---
    Yes!
[20:35] ---
    But that sure was one
    hell of a seaside camp.
[20:39] ---
    That's Hakuou Academy for you...
[20:43] ---
    Oh? Katsy, this plane
    is flying over mountains.
[20:48] ---
    Huh?
[20:49] ---
    We're not heading back
    to the Hakuou Academy?!
[20:53] ---
    Hey, where do you think you're going?
[20:56] ---
    If you do not like the seaside camp,
[20:59] ---
    I shall create a school camp in the woods.
[21:02] ---
    Schmidt?!
[21:03] ---
    Who knows where the group is headed?
[21:07] ---
    Next time, they will fight
    the memories of a summer.
SIGN    Maria's Room
[21:14] ---
    Hello, I'm Maria.
[21:16] ---
    Our guests today are Miss
    Sakuya Aizawa's butlers,
[21:19] ---
    Mr. Makita and Mr. Kunieda.
[21:22] ---
    I'm Makita.
[21:23] ---
    I'm Kunieda.
[21:24] ---
    Neither of you have appeared
    in the episodes recently,
[21:28] ---
    but what kinds of things
    do you do on your days off?
[21:30] ---
    I bought a guitar a short while ago, but...
[21:33] ---
    E and stuff is fine, but F is just...!
[21:35] ---
    Oh, I'm Makita.
[21:36] ---
    Cleaning my room, I suppose...
[21:38] ---
    Oh, but when I'm cleaning,
    I can't help but end up reading books.
[21:41] ---
    Oh, I'm Kunieda.
[21:42] ---
    Wow, I had no idea.
[21:45] ---
    Thank you for joining me today.
[21:48] ---
    Well, then see you again next time.
SIGN     Please look forward to next time.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful,
    it'll be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    SIGN: Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Hello, hello, hello! I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:31] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:32] ---
    Oh? We're playing your song again?
[23:34] ---
    On a certain jungle-like dot-com site,
[23:36] ---
    I currently rank higher than Hinagiku,
[23:38] ---
    but to be extra safe,
    I'm giving it one more push!
[23:40] ---
    I see...
[23:41] ---
    Now is the time to prove who's
    the heroine of "Hayate the Combat Butler"!
[23:45] ---
    That's my Miss!
[23:46] ---
    Your competitiveness
    is growing ever more polished.
[23:50] ---
    Hayate, the word "defeat" does not
    exist in Nagi Sanzenin's vocabulary!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    And now, next time on
    "Hayate the Combat Butler"...
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Saki's been acting strange lately.
[24:02] ---
    It seems she's got
    something on her mind, but...
[24:04] ---
    Saki doesn't look it, but I guess her
    coming-of-age ceremony is next year.
[24:07] ---
    Incidentally, how was your
    coming-of-age ceremony, Maria?
[24:10] ---
    I'm a young and fresh
    17 years old, you know.
[24:12] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    "Miss Saki's Little Preoccupation
    (National Edition) 2007".
[24:17] ---
    Come to think of it,
    no one celebrated my birthday.
[24:19] ---
    Miss Saki's Little
    Preoccupation (National Edition) 2007
[24:20] ---
    Well, not that it really matters.
[24:22] ---
    Join Hayate again next time to "Release!"

19 - Miss Saki's Little Preoccupation (National Edition) 2007

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:38] ---
    Miss, what is this?
[00:41] ---
    It seems rather avant-garde...
[00:42] ---
    Yeah, when I went
    to rent videos from Wataru,
[00:45] ---
    it looked interesting, so I couldn't
    resist bringing it back.
[00:48] ---
    You have to show it to
    at least 2 people within a week
[00:50] ---
    or you die.
[00:51] ---
    Wait, what?! Isn't that the curse
    from that loopish video?!
[00:58] ---
    There's no way such
    an unscientific thing could be true.
[01:01] ---
    I guess even you have
    a rather childlike side to you.
[01:05] ---
    Oh, right. You're right.
[01:08] ---
    Allow me to explain, just to be clear.
[01:10] ---
    The loopish video refers
    to the movie "Ring"...
[01:12] ---
    No, no! Please don't say anything more!
[01:15] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:18] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:21] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:24] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[01:28] ---
    Yes!
[01:29] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[01:33] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:37] ---
    Our theme may be horror,
    which is typical for the Obon festival,
[01:39] ---
    but perhaps I still acted too scared.
[01:40] ---
    It's the Obon festival anyway.
    No one's watching,
[01:42] ---
    so we'll go with animated storyboards
    for the rest of the episode!
[01:44] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:44] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:51] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:51] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:57] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:57] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:00] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:00] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:05] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:05] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:09] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:09] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:13] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:13] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:18] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:18] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:21] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:21] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:28] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:28] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:35] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:35] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:38] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:38] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:41] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:41] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:47] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:47] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:54] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:54] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:13] ---
    Miss Saki's Little Preoccupation
    (National Edition) 2007
SIGN    Video Tachibana
[03:18] ---
    What's with that damn Nagi?!
    She's late again!
[03:21] ---
    Sure, she probably can't understand Oshii's
    work just watching it once, but still!
[03:27] ---
    Huh?
[03:28] ---
    That loopish video isn't here.
SIGN    Summer Horror Fair
[03:30] ---
    I had no idea there were people kooky enough
    to rent a knockoff like that.
[03:34] ---
    Oh, Saki,
[03:36] ---
    Nagi's late again, so give her
    a call to remind her for me.
[03:44] ---
    What's with her?
[03:51] ---
    It's been a week since then,
    but nothing's happened.
[03:55] ---
    I told you, didn't I?
[03:57] ---
    There can't possibly be such
    things as ghosts in this world.
[04:01] ---
    You're right.
[04:03] ---
    Maria sure is something, though.
[04:05] ---
    She's so mature. I bet there's nothing
    that she can't handle.
[04:09] ---
    Oh, that reminds me. We received
    a watermelon as a gift, didn't we?
[04:12] ---
    How would you like some?
[04:14] ---
    What? Then let us be sure
    to serve it to the Miss as well.
[04:16] ---
    Oh, no, that is...
[04:18] ---
    I actually took some to Nagi earlier, but...
[04:24] ---
    This is no good!
[04:25] ---
    I need a better name
    that reaches out and grabs people!
[04:28] ---
    I'm going to incorporate horror
    and develop a new genre!
[04:33] ---
    I see.
[04:34] ---
    When it comes to manga,
    the Miss gets too absorbed in it.
[04:37] ---
    Well, that's also one
    of her good qualities, though.
[04:41] ---
    Give me some, too.
[04:43] ---
    Wataru, what brings you here?
[04:44] ---
    Hmm, you know, well...
[04:47] ---
    Stupid Nagi's late again, so I'm here
    to give her a little reminder.
[04:50] ---
    Oh, what was that weird video?
[04:53] ---
    So that's it. I noticed it was
    missing from the store.
[04:56] ---
    I guess Nagi took it
    without letting me know.
[04:58] ---
    It was made right around
    when the original became a hit.
SIGN    The Loop
[05:01] ---
    A knockoff and a pale imitation at that.
[05:03] ---
    I never imagined anyone would want to
    watch something so obviously lame.
[05:07] ---
    I mean, if Sadako comes
    out of it, that's one thing,
[05:10] ---
    but as I recall, when you watch that video,
[05:13] ---
    the thing that comes out is like this.
[05:15] ---
    Hmm, something like that would
    certainly be creepy, though...
[05:19] ---
    Don't you think, Maria?
[05:22] ---
    Oh? Is something the matter?
[05:32] ---
    Saki's been acting strange.
[05:34] ---
    It seems she's got something on her mind,
[05:36] ---
    but she won't even talk to me about it.
[05:38] ---
    I swear! Just because she's turned 20,
[05:41] ---
    is she trying to tell me that she
    can't turn to a 13-year-old for help?
[05:44] ---
    Wow.
[05:45] ---
    Saki doesn't look it, but I guess her
    coming-of-age ceremony is next year.
[05:49] ---
    Coming-of-age ceremony?
SIGN    May of This Year
[05:52] ---
    Wow, so you're turning 20 in June.
[05:56] ---
    Yes.
[05:56] ---
    Maybe I should get you something
    to mark the occasion.
[05:59] ---
    What do you want?
[06:00] ---
    That sentiment alone is enough for me.
[06:02] ---
    You're always wearing a maid uniform...
[06:05] ---
    All right, want me to buy you
    a long-sleeved kimono?
[06:07] ---
    W-Would you really, Young Sir?!
[06:09] ---
    If you're turning 20, you'll need one
    for the ceremony and stuff, right?
[06:15] ---
    What is it?
[06:16] ---
    D-Don't you want one?
[06:18] ---
    It's not that.
[06:19] ---
    Then, I shall look forward to it
    without getting my hopes up too much,
[06:23] ---
    Young Sir.
[06:26] ---
    Could it be because I forgot her birthday
[06:28] ---
    and her long-sleeved kimono
    for her coming-of-age ceremony?
[06:30] ---
    Is that why she's depressed?
[06:32] ---
    Hey, are birthdays and
    coming-of-age ceremonies important?
[06:35] ---
    Well, I imagine they're pretty important.
[06:38] ---
    Incidentally, how was your
    coming-of-age ceremony, Maria?
[06:41] ---
    Huh?
[06:42] ---
    What?!
[06:44] ---
    Oh, r-right...
[06:45] ---
    You're still 17, so your
    ceremony's still a ways off...
[06:48] ---
    That's right.
SIGN    ROARRRR
[06:50] ---
    I'm a young and fresh
    17 years old, you know.
[06:53] ---
    So why...
[06:55] ---
    ...did you think I'd already had
    my coming-of-age ceremony?
[06:59] ---
    M-Maria, you've been acting
    strange for a while now!
[07:02] ---
    I-I haven't been acting strange.
[07:07] ---
    I just remembered something I have to do.
[07:09] ---
    Uh... I really wonder
    what's gotten into her.
[07:14] ---
    Her coming-of-age ceremony...
[07:16] ---
    I guess I'll just start
    by asking Saki directly.
SIGN    Video Rental V Tachibana
[07:24] ---
    Hey, Saki...
[07:27] ---
    Were you sighing because
    I'd forgotten your birthday present?
[07:32] ---
    Come to think of it,
    no one celebrated my birthday.
[07:38] ---
    Well, not that it really matters.
[07:44] ---
    I can't get back the time I've lost,
[07:46] ---
    but I believe I can win back the trust!
[07:49] ---
    Uh-huh... So what do you want from me?
[07:51] ---
    I want to give a present!
[07:53] ---
    No thanks.
[07:53] ---
    Like hell I'd ever give you a damn present!
SIGN    BA-BAM BAM BAM BAM
SIGN    Can't show you!
[07:57] ---
    When you're asking a favor of someone,
[07:59] ---
    as Haman Khan said, you would do well
    to watch your language.
[08:03] ---
    Yessir...
[08:04] ---
    Good grief.
[08:05] ---
    In the end, it's better for her
    to be playing nicely with her friends,
[08:07] ---
    rather than working on manga by herself.
[08:10] ---
    Let me go see about
    getting these two some tea.
[08:13] ---
    So? What's this about a present?
[08:15] ---
    Oh, no, so...
[08:17] ---
    I want to give someone
    a long-sleeved kimono as a present,
[08:20] ---
    but I don't know what kind to get her...
[08:21] ---
    Oh-ho, a long-sleeved
    kimono as a present, huh?
[08:25] ---
    I see, so finally, you've...
[08:27] ---
    Huh?
[08:28] ---
    Go to this store.
[08:30] ---
    It's pretty cheap and they have
    the sort of kimono she'd like in stock.
[08:33] ---
    R-Really?!
[08:35] ---
    I'll owe you one, Nagi!
[08:36] ---
    Then I'll head over there right away.
[08:38] ---
    Oh, but don't buy anything too cheap!
[08:44] ---
    Let me ask you, just so I know...
[08:45] ---
    About how much does one
    long-sleeved kimono cost?
[08:48] ---
    Oh, it won't cost as much as 2 Ferraris.
[08:51] ---
    How the hell does one outfit
    cost more than a Ferrari?!
[08:53] ---
    Don't mock the money sense
    of the general public!
[08:56] ---
    Would you shut up?
[08:58] ---
    The chair I hit you with earlier
    was even more expensive.
[09:01] ---
    What kind of goods
    are you using on a daily basis?
[09:03] ---
    Besides, once a man's decided
    to give a woman a present,
[09:07] ---
    paying that kind of money...
[09:09] ---
    ...is a given! What's
    the point if you can't?!
[09:11] ---
    S-Sure, that may be true, but...
[09:14] ---
    Where am I supposed to get
    that kind of money?!
[09:17] ---
    What?
[09:18] ---
    It may be in name only,
    but we're still betrothed.
[09:21] ---
    No interest, pay it back
    when you make it big.
[09:23] ---
    What?
[09:23] ---
    Now, what will it be?
[09:29] ---
    So bright!
[09:32] ---
    What?!
SIGN    Roaches Come Come
SIGN    Combat
[09:38] ---
    Amazing! An Onmyou mystic!
[09:41] ---
    What is all this?!
[09:42] ---
    Maria, you're acting strange!
[09:45] ---
    What? How do you mean?
[09:47] ---
    There's nothing strange going on here.
[09:50] ---
    Wh-What in the world...
[09:55] ---
    Nooo!
[09:58] ---
    What?
[09:59] ---
    I-I... Anything but that! Anything but that!
[10:02] ---
    I can handle anything but those
    black things that go scurrying!
[10:07] ---
    I had no idea Maria had
    a side to her like this.
[10:12] ---
    I'm sorry. For losing my composure...
[10:15] ---
    But it's the one thing that I just can't...
[10:17] ---
    It'll be all right.
[10:19] ---
    Even if it were to show up,
[10:20] ---
    I will protect you, without fail.
[10:22] ---
    Y-You will? Really?
[10:25] ---
    Yes!
[10:39] ---
    Roach!
[10:43] ---
    What's that?!
[10:45] ---
    I-It can't be!
[10:47] ---
    H-Hayate, was that...
[10:49] ---
    It's going to be all right, Maria.
[10:55] ---
    Roach!
[10:59] ---
    Roach!
[11:00] ---
    Roach, roach, roach,
    roach, roach, roach, roach!
[11:04] ---
    I am coming to be with you.
    (Ima ai ni ikimasu.)
[11:08] ---
    I-I can feel a draft.
    (Su-Suusuu surun desu.)
[11:14] ---
    I had no idea the Young Sir
    was so concerned about my birthday.
[11:19] ---
    In contrast to that,
    Granny hasn't even called me.
[11:24] ---
    Let us explain this to you now.
[11:26] ---
    Saki Kijima's grandmother is...
[11:28] ---
    ...the legendary house maid, Rei Kijima.
[11:32] ---
    In search of her missing daughter
    and her husband, i.e. Saki's parents,
[11:36] ---
    Rei Kijima went traveling across the world
    with her granddaughter, Saki.
[11:41] ---
    At one time, she saved a president
    from being assassinated.
[11:47] ---
    At another time, she solved
    a difficult cold case.
[11:53] ---
    And on yet another occasion,
    she found an oppressed people,
[11:57] ---
    whom she frequently freed
    with dishes that impressed the Emperor.
[12:00] ---
    Uh, however, the legendary house maid
    was already 62 years old.
[12:05] ---
    Smack dab in the middle
    of the Sahara Desert,
[12:06] ---
    she was on the brink of death.
[12:10] ---
    Granny! Granny!
[12:12] ---
    Are you going to let your
    exhaustion overcome you here?!
[12:14] ---
    O Rei Kijima, legendary house maid?!
[12:17] ---
    This man is none other than the
    leader of the Tachibana Group,
[12:20] ---
    Enkyou Tachibana himself!
[12:24] ---
    Enkyou rescued Rei Kijima
    and also Saki, while he was at it.
[12:28] ---
    A soul-deep rapport grows
    between Rei Kijima and Enkyou,
[12:30] ---
    which is neither love nor friendship!
[12:32] ---
    And to repay him, Rei fights!
    Against evil! And against culprits!
[12:37] ---
    In the midst of all this, there was
    a new encounter for Saki, too.
[12:43] ---
    Her encounter with Wataru.
[12:44] ---
    Being too young, the mother showed
    almost no interest in her own son.
[12:49] ---
    Seeing him in profile,
    looking so lonely, Saki swore...
[12:52] ---
    ...that in thanks for rescuing Rei Kijima,
[12:54] ---
    she would repay them by raising
    this child to be a fine adult.
[12:59] ---
    There you are. Tea.
[13:01] ---
    To Saki, it seemed as though their two
    souls, abandoned by their mothers,
[13:05] ---
    were calling to one another.
[13:10] ---
    The tea I make tastes better.
[13:12] ---
    However, Wataru turned out
    to be an unexpectedly skillful boy,
[13:15] ---
    capable of doing anything
[13:18] ---
    and he was far better at things
    than the naturally klutzy Saki.
[13:24] ---
    Considering how the Young Sir is,
[13:25] ---
    will I be able to guide him
    so that he becomes a fine adult?
[13:29] ---
    Incidentally, Saki's parents
    live in Ueno even now,
[13:32] ---
    so please rest assured
    that they are not missing.
SIGN    Sanzenin
[13:48] ---
    A d-dead end!
[13:49] ---
    Please hang on tight!
[13:57] ---
    Hayate...
[14:01] ---
    Really, such a beautiful day.
[14:04] ---
    Oh?
[14:05] ---
    On days like this,
    there is no better pastime
[14:07] ---
    than to go around giving new
    meanings to the garden flowers.
[14:13] ---
    Beep! Target sighted!
SIGN    Security
[14:16] ---
    Roach!
[14:17] ---
    Jet Stream Attack!
[14:19] ---
    Roach!
[14:20] ---
    Attack!
[14:22] ---
    Roach!
[14:23] ---
    Attack!
[14:25] ---
    Roach!
[14:26] ---
    Attack!
[14:28] ---
    Roach!
[14:35] ---
    We can get him! We'll do
    the Jet Stream Attack one more time!
[14:38] ---
    Roger!
[14:40] ---
    Roach!
[14:41] ---
    Jet Stream...
[14:46] ---
    Roach!
[14:47] ---
    Roach!
[14:48] ---
    ...Attack!
[14:49] ---
    Roach!
[14:52] ---
    Beep! He used me as a stepping stone!
[14:56] ---
    We should be fine,
    now that we've come this far.
[14:58] ---
    Based on what evidence?
[15:02] ---
    Hayate...
[15:03] ---
    Oh, no, anyone would have
    done the same in my place.
[15:07] ---
    No, that!
[15:09] ---
    Roach!
[15:12] ---
    You're one persistent bastard!
[15:13] ---
    I'll protect Maria!
[15:16] ---
    Butler Kick!
SIGN    BAM
[15:25] ---
    Roach!
[15:28] ---
    Roach?
[15:36] ---
    You lay a hand on Hayate
    and you will regret it!
[15:42] ---
    R-Roach...
[15:50] ---
    Roach!
[15:56] ---
    Ow, that hurt...
[15:58] ---
    Maria...
[15:59] ---
    Hayate!
[16:01] ---
    Are you all right?
[16:02] ---
    I talked big, saying I would protect you,
[16:04] ---
    but you ended up protecting me.
[16:06] ---
    That's not true.
[16:09] ---
    You did protect me, Hayate.
[16:11] ---
    Maria...
[16:15] ---
    Oh, no! If that thing goes after Nagi...
[16:18] ---
    The Miss!
[16:25] ---
    Here I was thinking I had arrived
    without getting lost for once,
[16:29] ---
    but I come to find a little one
    who has become lost in here.
[16:34] ---
    Roach!
[16:44] ---
    Isumi, I had no idea you were here!
[16:47] ---
    Oh, did you see a black
    scurrying thing around here?!
[16:51] ---
    Oh, that little one went home already.
[16:56] ---
    Isumi defeated that thing...?!
[16:58] ---
    What's this commotion about?
[17:02] ---
    I didn't know you were here!
[17:03] ---
    Did you hear from Wataru?
[17:05] ---
    What?
[17:07] ---
    That's not why?
[17:09] ---
    I guess he's shy,
    in spite of the way he acts.
[17:19] ---
    When you get down to it, a present
    has to come out of your own pocket.
[17:22] ---
    Once I looked at what
    my savings could buy me,
[17:25] ---
    I ended up with a summer kimono.
[17:28] ---
    My, what an adorable summer kimono.
[17:32] ---
    Isumi!
[17:33] ---
    Oh, sorry... But what are you doing here?
[17:36] ---
    Um... Nagi said...
[17:39] ---
    ...that you had something important
    to say to me and a wonderful present,
[17:43] ---
    so I should come to your house right away.
[17:47] ---
    Could the present be...
[17:49] ---
    ...that?
[17:50] ---
    Oh, no! This is...
[17:52] ---
    Then, what was the important
    thing you had to say to me?
[17:56] ---
    Damn Nagi and her meddlesome ways!
[17:59] ---
    But this is a golden opportunity!
[18:01] ---
    I can give this summer kimono to Isumi
    and tell her how I feel...
[18:08] ---
    How I feel...
[18:12] ---
    Isumi!
[18:13] ---
    Yes?
[18:14] ---
    I was able to get two
    of the "Changéríon" box sets,
[18:18] ---
    so I'll give you one!
[18:19] ---
    Oh, my!
[18:20] ---
    So, what was the important
    thing you want to say to me?
[18:23] ---
    It was about the performance of
    Mr. Hagino, who plays the lead!
[18:25] ---
    It's different from Asakura
    in "Masked Rider Ryuki",
[18:26] ---
    and his cheerful performance
    is a real highlight!
[18:29] ---
    Well, take your time watching it
    when you get back.
[18:31] ---
    I will. Thank you, Wataru.
[18:43] ---
    Young Sir?
[18:47] ---
    What are you doing out here?
[18:50] ---
    Uh, right...
[18:54] ---
    Oh?
[18:55] ---
    This is...
[18:56] ---
    Well, you know,
    I felt bad for forgetting, so...
[19:02] ---
    I can smell another
    woman's scent in this room!
[19:06] ---
    Huh?!
[19:07] ---
    Could it be that you brought home a girl
    while I was gone and...
[19:11] ---
    Uh... did pervy things...?!
[19:15] ---
    No!
[19:16] ---
    A present for you! This summer kimono!
[19:19] ---
    What? Why did you get me a present?
[19:22] ---
    Because... like...
[19:24] ---
    I didn't have enough money
    and I couldn't buy a long-sleeved kimono,
[19:27] ---
    and this can't really take its place,
[19:29] ---
    but I forgot to get you a birthday present
[19:32] ---
    and I thought maybe that's why
    you'd been so mopey lately, so...
[19:35] ---
    Oh!
[19:37] ---
    The thing that was bothering me...
[19:38] ---
    ...was what color I should get
    for my new cell phone...
[19:43] ---
    Huh?!
[19:56] ---
    Well, that's okay...
[20:03] ---
    Good grief.
[20:05] ---
    So it seems that wasn't a present for Isumi.
[20:08] ---
    I see.
[20:09] ---
    So, did you end up lending him money?
[20:12] ---
    No.
[20:13] ---
    He said it was pointless
    if he didn't pay for it himself,
[20:15] ---
    so it seems he bought a cheap summer
    kimono instead of a long-sleeved one.
[20:18] ---
    Paid about 50,000.
[20:19] ---
    F-Fifty thousand...
[20:20] ---
    That is not cheap.
[20:22] ---
    By the way, that loopish
    thing hasn't shown up.
[20:25] ---
    See? Stuff like that is superstition.
[20:30] ---
    Yes.
[20:31] ---
    Mm-hm.
[20:32] ---
    Wh-What was that?! Did a missile
    come flying from somewhere?!
[20:36] ---
    They started a fireworks show nearby.
[20:39] ---
    Fireworks, huh? Nothing says
    summer like fireworks.
[20:42] ---
    All right, let's go out together, Hayate.
[20:44] ---
    Yes, Miss.
[20:50] ---
    Nothing says summer like grilled
    squid from a street stall!
[21:08] ---
    Y-You look good in that summer kimono.
[21:12] ---
    Thank you very much, Young Sir.
[21:14] ---
    It just may be that yet another
    new misunderstanding has been born.
[21:21] ---
    Hurry! Hurry!
[21:30] ---
    Pretty, isn't it, Hayate?
[21:32] ---
    Yes.
[21:38] ---
    Roach.
SIGN    Frozen!
[21:43] ---
    Next time, a dragon and a hamster...
[21:46] ---
    ...will fight over the one they love
    and their maidenly pride.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:13] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:13] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:31] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:31] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:49] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:49] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:03] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:03] ---
    Stars so beautiful,
    it'll be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    SIGN: Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    The Iron Cross Killer! I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:32] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:33] ---
    Man, it's really gotten hot lately.
[23:35] ---
    The highs in Nerima surpassed
    30 degrees Celsius today.
[23:37] ---
    Please don't make such offhand remarks.
[23:39] ---
    We won't know if it'll be hot
    on the actual day this airs.
[23:41] ---
    And depending on the region,
    it'll air on different days, too.
[23:44] ---
    Never mind that. What I want to say...
[23:46] ---
    ...is that when it's hot, stay
    cooped up in a room with A/C blasting,
[23:49] ---
    play some online game,
    and listen to my character song!
[23:52] ---
    You shouldn't spend your summer
    in such an unhealthy way!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    All right! Starting today,
    it's summer break!
[23:58] ---
    Starting today, I'm going to play
    online games, watch anime, draw manga,
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    and have all the fun I want every day!
[24:03] ---
    I feel like her life is pretty similar,
    even when she has school...
[24:06] ---
    Aw, man, summer break's here,
[24:09] ---
    but I don't feel very happy somehow.
[24:10] ---
    I wonder what Hayate's doing...
[24:12] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    "I Like Books, But Sing It
    Great Palace of the Dragon King".
[24:16] ---
    Oh, you're that thieving hamster!
[24:19] ---
    I Like Books, But Sing It
    Great Palace of the Dragon King
[24:19] ---
    Wh-Who are you calling a thieving hamster?!
[24:22] ---
    The Sign of the Guardian guides me.

20 - I Like Books, But Sing It Great Palace of the Dragon King

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:17] ---
    Looks like it's going to be a hot day.
[00:22] ---
    Oh, good morning, Miss.
[00:25] ---
    Yes, I am going to school.
[00:29] ---
    Yes, Miss! Then I shall
    accompany you as well.
[00:33] ---
    Wait, what?!
[00:34] ---
    What has gotten into you, Miss?!
[00:36] ---
    Getting up this early
    in the morning all on your own?!
[00:40] ---
    Not to mention, heading off
    to school of your own volition?!
[00:42] ---
    I mean, to begin with,
    summer break started today...
[00:44] ---
    Just kidding!
[00:46] ---
    Huh?
[00:49] ---
    Surprised? That was a great joke of mine.
[00:52] ---
    A joke?
[00:54] ---
    Oh, I see, so that's what it was.
[00:56] ---
    Knowing it's summer break,
    I feel too restless.
[00:59] ---
    How could I sleep?!
[01:02] ---
    All right!
[01:03] ---
    Starting today, I'm going to play
    online games, watch anime, draw manga,
[01:06] ---
    and have all the fun I want every day!
[01:08] ---
    I feel like her life is pretty similar,
    even when she has school...
[01:11] ---
    But I guess she must be really happy,
    considering how excited she is.
[01:21] ---
    Starting today, I can spend all my time
    with Hayate every day.
[01:29] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:32] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:35] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:38] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[01:42] ---
    Yes!
[01:43] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[01:47] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:51] ---
    But wait, I just transferred
    and it's already summer break...
[01:54] ---
    Other than greet my classmates
    and duel at the kendo club,
[01:56] ---
    did I do anything?
[01:58] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:58] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:05] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:05] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:11] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:11] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:14] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:14] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:19] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:19] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:23] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:23] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:27] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:27] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:32] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:32] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:36] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:36] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:42] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:42] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:49] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:49] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:52] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:52] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:55] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:55] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:01] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:01] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:08] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:08] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:26] ---
    I Like Books, But Sing It
    Great Palace of the Dragon King
SIGN    Hakuou Academy
[03:35] ---
    Man, summer break is pure bliss!
[03:42] ---
    I can drink all the sake
    I want all day long!
[03:45] ---
    On top of which, I can do
    stuff like this all I want, too!
[03:50] ---
    I swear, doing nothing
    is the ultimate form of luxury!
[03:54] ---
    Katsy!
[03:56] ---
    Let's play!
[04:00] ---
    What are you guys, grade school
    kids from the Showa Era?
[04:03] ---
    We figured you would have time to kill,
    so we came to invite you along.
[04:06] ---
    Sorry! I appreciate the thought,
    but I'm busy right now...
[04:12] ---
    Let's go catch rhinoceros beetles!
[04:14] ---
    How about a tour on foot
    of the thick woods around Fuji?!
[04:18] ---
    Hey! What are you doing?! Let me go!
[04:24] ---
    Um, Maria, do you know
    any lethal techniques?
[04:28] ---
    Err... This is out of the blue.
    What is this about?
[04:32] ---
    Well, I met some people I believe to be
    first-rate butlers at Hakuou Academy
[04:37] ---
    and according to them,
[04:38] ---
    it seems first-rate butlers need
    to know a lethal technique or two.
[04:42] ---
    Uh-huh...
[04:43] ---
    So I'm thinking of learning some
    kind of lethal technique, too!
[04:47] ---
    I see, so that's what this is about.
[04:50] ---
    Uh, but why ask me?
[04:52] ---
    Why? Well...
[04:53] ---
    This is just a hunch of mine,
[04:55] ---
    but you look like someone
    who might know the Art of Assassination.
[04:59] ---
    I do not know it!
[05:00] ---
    But based on my hunch...
[05:01] ---
    Please toss your useless hunches
    in the trash this instant!
[05:05] ---
    What?! You know it, don't you?!
[05:07] ---
    Nagi, not you, too.
[05:09] ---
    I thought you'd at least know the Five
    Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique!
[05:13] ---
    Right?!
[05:13] ---
    Yes...
[05:18] ---
    Honestly! Don't turn me into
    a master of some fanboy technique.
[05:22] ---
    Besides, lethal techniques
    cannot be learned so easily.
[05:26] ---
    I'm sure that's true, but...
[05:29] ---
    Summer break is a great opportunity
    and I'd like to master one.
[05:32] ---
    I was hoping there might be a book
    to help me master a lethal technique...
[05:37] ---
    A book...
[05:43] ---
    Wow!
[05:45] ---
    I would expect nothing
    less of a Sanzenin library.
[05:47] ---
    What an amazing number of books!
[05:49] ---
    Which makes cleaning a real chore.
[05:52] ---
    But books are great.
[05:54] ---
    When you immerse yourself in a book,
    surrounded by all these books,
[05:57] ---
    it truly makes you feel intellectual.
[05:59] ---
    I see. That's my Miss.
[06:01] ---
    Oh, these must be the shelves
    stocked exclusively for you, Miss.
[06:04] ---
    Hm? How did you know?
[06:06] ---
    Because this is the one
    area littered with manga.
[06:10] ---
    Y-You're wrong, you know!
    I read other books, too!
[06:14] ---
    Yes, I know that.
[06:16] ---
    Look at all these video game guides.
[06:18] ---
    Like I said!
[06:19] ---
    Reading really does
    make you feel intellectual.
[06:22] ---
    Quit mocking me!
[06:25] ---
    I don't see any...
[06:26] ---
    To be so fixated on lethal techniques...
[06:29] ---
    I cannot comprehend it.
[06:32] ---
    I can.
[06:34] ---
    What?
[06:36] ---
    Hayate must want to
    show me how cool he can be.
[06:46] ---
    I shall protect you with this
    elegant technique of mine, Miss.
[06:50] ---
    Ah! This is impressive, Hayate!
[06:53] ---
    What is it?
[06:54] ---
    N-Nothing.
[06:56] ---
    All right, Hayate! I'll help you, too.
[06:59] ---
    I'll look for books with clues
    about lethal techniques with you.
[07:03] ---
    Oh, thank you very much, Miss.
[07:08] ---
    Honestly! Lethal techniques!
SIGN    Lethal Techniques in a Nutshell Book of Secret Sanzenin Techniques
[07:11] ---
    It's not like online karate classes
[07:12] ---
    or like learning to draw manga
    at a technical school.
[07:14] ---
    As if there would be a book
    that could teach it to you so easily...
SIGN    Lethal Techniques in a Nutshell Book of Secret Sanzenin Techniques
[07:22] ---
    Funnily enough, there actually might be.
[07:24] ---
    "Lethal Techniques in a Nutshell
    with Colored Charts"!
[07:27] ---
    I never imagined there would be
    such a useful sounding book!
[07:30] ---
    Yes!
SIGN    Book of Secret Sanzenin Techniques
[07:31] ---
    But what do you suppose these
    Secret Sanzenin Techniques are?
[07:33] ---
    Oh, come to think of it,
    Himegami used to use them.
[07:37] ---
    Mr. Himegami?
[07:39] ---
    Um, I hear his name come up
    every so often, but...
[07:42] ---
    Oh, did I never tell you about him?
[07:46] ---
    He was Nagi's butler before you came along.
[07:49] ---
    Though, various things happened
    and he ended up leaving...
[07:52] ---
    I see.
[07:53] ---
    And this butler named Mr. Himegami
    also knew lethal techniques?
[07:56] ---
    Does that mean that perhaps
    Mr. Klaus also knows such techniques?
[08:04] ---
    Would you like to know
    what my lethal technique is?
[08:07] ---
    No, no, not really right now...
[08:09] ---
    Quit playing around and go do work!
[08:15] ---
    Anyway, if other butlers can do it,
    there's no way you couldn't, either!
[08:19] ---
    Miss!
[08:23] ---
    Hayate, we're going to do special
    training based on this book!
[08:26] ---
    What? Y-Yes, Master!
[08:28] ---
    I'll do my best!
[08:29] ---
    Don't call me "Master"!
[08:31] ---
    Call me Undefeated of the North,
    South, East, West, and Middle!
[08:33] ---
    Huh? That's a little too long...
[08:35] ---
    Quiet!
[08:37] ---
    Now, follow me!
[08:40] ---
    A-Are you all right?!
[08:42] ---
    I scraped up my knee a little.
[08:44] ---
    There goes the myth of being undefeated,
    north, south, east, west, and middle.
[08:49] ---
    It sure is hot outside.
[08:51] ---
    Miss, perhaps you shouldn't
    strain yourself too much
[08:53] ---
    and take it easy in an air conditioned room.
[08:55] ---
    No, this is for the sake
    of your lethal technique!
[08:58] ---
    Then let's get started.
[09:00] ---
    Yes! Please instruct me!
[09:02] ---
    Rarrr!
[09:03] ---
    Well, let's start with something basic.
[09:06] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[09:06] ---
    "Case 1 – the secret technique
    for when you're engulfed in flames."
[09:12] ---
    What's it say? Let's see...
[09:14] ---
    Uh, um, aren't there any secret techniques
[09:17] ---
    for defeating the enemy before
    you become engulfed in flames?
[09:20] ---
    Hmm, there doesn't seem
    to be anything in particular.
[09:23] ---
    Starting with a technique
    for such a dire situation is a bit...
[09:25] ---
    Well, shall we give it a try anyway, Tama?
[09:28] ---
    Let's see... "First, like
    the Conqueror of Century's End,
[09:31] ---
    "command a body that does
    not burn, even in flames..."
[09:33] ---
    Raoooh!
[09:35] ---
    No, no, the entire premise is wrong!
[09:37] ---
    But if you can't do this,
[09:39] ---
    Case 2 – the secret technique
    for when you get shoved off a cliff...
[09:41] ---
    As I said, let us do something about it
    before getting shoved off a cliff!
[09:45] ---
    Then...
SIGN    The Secret Technique for Becoming More Lovey-Dovey with the Guy You Like
[09:49] ---
    What is it, Miss?
[09:51] ---
    What?! It's n-n-n-nothing! It's nothing!
[09:55] ---
    Wh-What kind of secret
    technique is this in here?
[09:57] ---
    But I would love to master it!
[09:59] ---
    You want to master it, do you?
[10:01] ---
    Miss?
[10:03] ---
    Wh-Wh-Wh-What is it?!
[10:04] ---
    Oh, no,
[10:04] ---
    I'd like to skim through the whole book
    to see if there's anything useful,
[10:08] ---
    so would you mind letting me see it?
[10:10] ---
    Y-You can't! I decline! I absolutely refuse!
[10:13] ---
    What? Wh-Why not?
[10:14] ---
    It's too soon for you!
[10:16] ---
    Please!
[10:17] ---
    I wanna see!
[10:18] ---
    At any rate, I can't show you
    what I can't show you!
[10:21] ---
    Oh, Miss, it's dangerous to go that way!
[10:23] ---
    Miss?!
[10:26] ---
    So, how do I get to be more lovey-dovey?
SIGN    Get Naked!
[10:33] ---
    R-Ridiculous!
[10:34] ---
    The entire premise...
    The entire premise is wrong!
[10:36] ---
    Miss! In front! In front of you!
[10:38] ---
    Rarrr!
[10:39] ---
    If I could do something so embarrassing...
[10:46] ---
    Miss!
[10:46] ---
    Rarrr!
[10:52] ---
    Hayate!
[10:56] ---
    H-Hey, Hayate, are you alive?
[10:59] ---
    Are you all right, Miss?
[11:02] ---
    What? Oh... I am...
[11:04] ---
    Thank goodness.
[11:06] ---
    I'm so glad I was able to save you.
[11:10] ---
    Oh, right. I don't need
    to rely on any secret techniques.
[11:13] ---
    Hayate and I are...
[11:17] ---
    Th-Thank you.
[11:19] ---
    Most of this book is useless,
[11:21] ---
    but it's got some serious stuff,
    too, like things to watch out for.
[11:24] ---
    What? Really?
[11:26] ---
    Yes! If you work hard,
    you should be able to master these.
[11:30] ---
    Yes!
[11:31] ---
    All right! I'm going to learn
    a lethal technique this summer!
[11:34] ---
    Yes!
[11:35] ---
    I better work hard for Hinagiku, too.
[11:37] ---
    Yeah, you're right.
    For Hinagiku, too...
[11:40] ---
    Wait, what?
[11:41] ---
    For whom, did you say?
[11:43] ---
    Well, Hinagiku is always
    helping me out in various ways.
[11:47] ---
    Besides, I also promised her
    that I would show it to her
[11:49] ---
    once I mastered a super lethal technique!
[11:52] ---
    Promised? Oh, I see...
[11:56] ---
    Oh! The book of secret techniques!
[11:59] ---
    Miss, why...?!
[12:01] ---
    Ha... Ha... Hayate, you...
[12:04] ---
    Hayate, you jerk!
[12:11] ---
    Maria.
[12:13] ---
    Oh, my! What happened?!
[12:15] ---
    Won't you please teach me a surefire
    technique to soothe the Miss's temper.
[12:19] ---
    Uh, that would require
    quite a bit of training...
[12:23] ---
    It would still be a long way off
    before Hayate mastered a lethal technique.
[12:27] ---
    So, please continue to watch every
    episode of "Hayate the Combat Butler"!
[12:34] ---
    Watermelon seeds. Ptewy!
    (Suika no tane. Peh!)
[12:38] ---
    Fight, Pero!
    (Pero-san, faito!)
[12:40] ---
    What?!
[12:42] ---
    The Miss has run away from home?!
[12:44] ---
    Yes.
[12:45] ---
    Members of the SP are following her,
    so there's no need to worry...
[12:49] ---
    But it still makes me feel uneasy.
[12:50] ---
    Since everything the Miss does
    is so incredibly abrupt
[12:53] ---
    and the reasons for her actions
    are never that clear.
[12:56] ---
    I wonder what happened.
[12:57] ---
    No... I think the reason is undoubtedly you.
[13:02] ---
    All right! As the Miss's butler,
[13:04] ---
    and also to get to the bottom
    of her reasoning,
[13:06] ---
    I must go after her!
[13:08] ---
    I swear! That Hayate!
[13:10] ---
    What's this about it being for Hinagiku?!
[13:12] ---
    Does he mean to say that Hinagiku's
    more important to him than me?!
[13:16] ---
    If...
[13:17] ---
    If Hayate comes to love
    Hinagiku more than me...
[13:21] ---
    You can't. You just can't!
    This is wrong, Hayate.
[13:24] ---
    You have Nagi, your precious girlfriend!
[13:27] ---
    What are you saying, Hinagiku?
[13:30] ---
    You're the only woman I can think of
    that I'm destined to be with.
[13:36] ---
    Hayate!
[13:38] ---
    Hinagiku!
[13:41] ---
    Humph! What's with you?!
    Hayate, you stupid jerk!
[13:45] ---
    What about Hinagiku's so great anyway?!
[13:47] ---
    Hinagiku's just a little cute, that's all!
[13:49] ---
    And she's good-natured and smart and...
[13:51] ---
    On top of which, she's an all-around
    athlete, everyone trusts her,
[13:54] ---
    and even I wish I could
    be a little like her...
[13:56] ---
    H-Humph!
[14:00] ---
    When it comes to our bust sizes,
    we're about the same!
[14:02] ---
    What did you say?!
[14:05] ---
    And my grades are no worse than hers!
[14:08] ---
    Aw, man, summer break's here,
    but I don't feel very happy somehow.
[14:13] ---
    I wonder what Hayate's doing...
[14:15] ---
    Or actually...
[14:19] ---
    I wonder what Hayate was doing
    at such an incredible mansion.
[14:22] ---
    And...
[14:25] ---
    Who in the world is that girl?
[14:28] ---
    I have so many things I want to talk
    to Hayate about and ask about.
[14:32] ---
    Oh, honestly!
[14:33] ---
    I'm going to hurry home and go to bed!
[14:36] ---
    Oh?
[14:37] ---
    It's all Hayate's fault to begin with!
[14:39] ---
    You're...
[14:41] ---
    Oh, you're that...
[14:43] ---
    ...thieving hamster.
[14:45] ---
    Wha?!
[14:49] ---
    Wh-Who are you calling a thieving hamster?!
[14:51] ---
    Then, the trespassing hamster.
    The lock-picking hamster.
[14:55] ---
    For starters, I think I'd like
    for you to drop the "hamster" bit.
[14:58] ---
    Well, for starters,
    it was a fateful reunion.
[15:03] ---
    I'm glad that we've finally
    caught up with her, but...
[15:05] ---
    Yes...
[15:06] ---
    What is the Miss doing with Miss Nishizawa?
[15:09] ---
    Never mind that. Is there any point
    to this camouflage?
[15:13] ---
    Well, I thought it might be
    better to have than not...
[15:16] ---
    By the way, Hayate,
    I've been meaning to ask you, but...
[15:20] ---
    What is your relationship
    with that Miss Nishizawa?
[15:23] ---
    What?! No, uh...
[15:27] ---
    I love you, Hayate!
[15:28] ---
    What?!
[15:29] ---
    W-We're friends.
[15:31] ---
    She was my classmate at my old school...
[15:33] ---
    I see, that makes sense...
[15:35] ---
    What could those two be talking about?
[15:37] ---
    I would imagine it's about you...
[15:43] ---
    What?! You're the owner of that mansion
[15:46] ---
    and you took Hayate in when
    he was rendered homeless?!
[15:48] ---
    On top of which, as a butler,
    he's living with you under one roof?!
[15:51] ---
    Yes, that's right. You have
    a problem with that?
[15:53] ---
    Urk... What an envious...
[15:55] ---
    No, no, that's not it. I feel so defeated!
[15:58] ---
    Dear God, you're so mean.
    This is way unfair!
[16:02] ---
    So long, hamster. Don't ever
    come near my property again.
[16:06] ---
    Hold, you!
[16:07] ---
    What?
[16:08] ---
    If I back down now,
    I'll remain the miserable defeated!
[16:12] ---
    And my pride won't allow for that!
[16:14] ---
    Fight me! Fight me for Hayate!
[16:18] ---
    Very well. I just happen
    to be in a bad mood anyway.
[16:20] ---
    I'll turn the tables on you!
SIGN    Karaoke BOX
[16:27] ---
    What's this place?
[16:29] ---
    What's this place? As you
    can see, it's a karaoke booth.
[16:32] ---
    Don't you know?
[16:33] ---
    Ah! I've heard of these places...
[16:34] ---
    This is the first time I've ever
    set foot in such an odd place.
[16:37] ---
    Huh...
[16:38] ---
    But this is smaller than our bathroom.
[16:41] ---
    What?!
[16:41] ---
    If you spend hours and hours
    in this cramped, dimly lit box,
[16:44] ---
    even if you're not the heir
    to the Mendou Zaibatsu,
[16:47] ---
    I feel like you'd still become
    afraid of the dark and claustrophobic.
[16:49] ---
    Anyway, once we've ordered drinks,
    we're getting right to the battle.
[16:54] ---
    What do you want to drink?
[16:56] ---
    Oh, I won't mind ordering for you
    if it's like just one item.
[16:59] ---
    An infinitely pointless attempt to show off.
[17:03] ---
    Then, I'll have a Shiun matcha green tea
[17:05] ---
    and a tureen of foie gras from Périgord.
[17:07] ---
    I-I doubt they have those things...
[17:10] ---
    I don't really understand, but...
[17:13] ---
    It seems they're going to karaoke.
[17:15] ---
    What shall we do, Maria?
[17:17] ---
    Maria?
[17:18] ---
    Wh-What? Oh, uh, p-pardon me.
[17:21] ---
    For the time being, I've paid for
    the booth over here, so let's go in.
[17:24] ---
    Yes.
[17:27] ---
    But why did Miss Nishizawa bring
    the Miss to a place like this?
[17:31] ---
    Hayate! Hayate!
[17:33] ---
    Yes?
[17:34] ---
    Wh-What is this device?
[17:36] ---
    Well, you use it to punch in
    numbers to pick songs.
[17:41] ---
    I see, so that's how it works.
[17:44] ---
    My! How amazing!
    You can even adjust the pitch.
[17:48] ---
    Oh, can you search
    for them in this book, too?
[17:50] ---
    Wow, it's so thick!
[17:52] ---
    Um, since we're here anyway,
    would you like to try singing?
[17:55] ---
    What?!
[17:56] ---
    Wh-What are you saying,
    Hayate? I could never.
[17:59] ---
    I don't know any of the
    songs that are popular.
[18:02] ---
    Besides, I'm worried about Nagi.
[18:04] ---
    It'll be fine.
[18:06] ---
    We can see their room from here,
[18:08] ---
    and besides, I'd like to hear you sing.
[18:11] ---
    But...
[18:12] ---
    Th-Then, if you go first,
    I'll sing at least one song.
[18:16] ---
    What?!
[18:16] ---
    A-All right. Then I shall go first.
SIGN    I Belong to You
[18:28] ---
    Calling me from somewhere
[18:34] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[18:43] ---
    Yay!
[18:45] ---
    Now, to see the score
    we've been waiting for!
[18:48] ---
    Ta-da! 35 points...
SIGN    You suck! Go home!
[18:52] ---
    Why?
[18:53] ---
    Not surprising, considering
    how off key you were.
[18:57] ---
    Okay, it's your turn next!
[18:59] ---
    Right.
[19:03] ---
    She's never karaoked in her life.
    There's no way she'll sing well, right?
[19:07] ---
    Earlier, I was just warming up
    and I didn't give it my best shot,
[19:10] ---
    but once I get serious, I'll be sure to win!
[19:13] ---
    Just watch me, Hayate!
[19:14] ---
    I'll save you with my singing for sure!
[19:16] ---
    Get over here quick
[19:18] ---
    I'm a bit mad
[19:19] ---
    Wh-What?!
[19:20] ---
    Get over here quick
[19:22] ---
    At mach speeds
[19:23] ---
    What's with this sparkly aura?!
[19:25] ---
    Socially reclusive Sunday
[19:27] ---
    She looks like Kirari Tsukishima to me!
[19:29] ---
    No, you have to come flying right away
[19:31] ---
    I mean, she's really good!
[19:37] ---
    No, no, you just have to
[19:38] ---
    Of course, she is.
[19:40] ---
    Why? Because she's received education
    for the gifted since she was little.
[19:41] ---
    No
[19:43] ---
    and naturally, included in that
    curriculum was voice training
[19:45] ---
    I hope you'll be here soon
[19:47] ---
    from super top notch instructors,
    and singing lessons.
[19:50] ---
    You may have forgotten, but Nagi
    is technically a hyper refined young lady.
[19:53] ---
    This may be her first time at karaoke,
[19:55] ---
    but there's no way she'd lose
    to a run-of-the-mill high school girl.
SIGN    Actually, was that earlier singer Igant?
[20:03] ---
    How about that?
    Looks like this fight is over.
[20:05] ---
    Oh, no! We're only getting started here!
[20:07] ---
    Singing is love! There's
    no way I'm going to lose!
[20:09] ---
    Interesting! I'll pound you into the ground!
[20:12] ---
    That's my line!
SIGN    Karaoke BOX
[20:12] ---
    Their karaoke match got heated up even more
[20:13] ---
    Bring it on!
[20:15] ---
    and continued late
    into the night. And then...
[20:18] ---
    I sang a lot and I feel better now somehow.
[20:21] ---
    Sniff. I can't believe I lose every round.
[20:23] ---
    Oh, you want to use my credit card to pay?
[20:26] ---
    It's fine! I'll treat you
    for something small like this!
[20:29] ---
    I don't want to be indebted
    to a rival anyway!
[20:31] ---
    A rival?
[20:32] ---
    Isn't that a term for when two
    opponents are evenly matched?
SIGN    Welcome
[20:39] ---
    Miss, we have come to take you home.
[20:41] ---
    Ah, thanks. I'm surprised
    you knew where to find me.
[20:44] ---
    We received a call from your butler.
[20:46] ---
    From Hayate? I see.
[20:49] ---
    So long, hamster.
[20:53] ---
    Hold it right there!
[20:54] ---
    Next time, we'll compete
    in something different!
[20:58] ---
    Whenever you like.
    I'll turn the tables on you again.
[21:06] ---
    Now, then...
[21:08] ---
    Time to hurry home
    and play games with Hayate.
[21:11] ---
    Summer break has only just begun.
[21:13] ---
    But at that moment,
    the maid and the butler were...
[21:16] ---
    Lie to me, I'll see right through it
[21:20] ---
    I'm not blind
[21:20] ---
    Maria, why don't we stop around there...
[21:23] ---
    ...still singing.
[21:24] ---
    Romance, into your two hearts
[21:25] ---
    And thus, this was
    the first day of summer break...
[21:29] ---
    What should we do tomorrow for fun?
[21:32] ---
    Don't tell me you guys plan
    to keep staying here...
[21:35] ---
    ...and the various people
    enjoying it in their own way.
SIGN    Strait is the Gate
[21:38] ---
    Oh, incidentally...
[21:40] ---
    That should do it for the book report
    and English composition.
[21:43] ---
    ...we have one formidable
    character like her, too.
[21:45] ---
    Kids at home, make sure you
    plan out your homework well, too.
[21:48] ---
    Next time, we'll be battling
    minimum height restrictions.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful,
    it'll be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Isumi's...
SIGN    SIGN: Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report.
[23:30] ---
    Hello, I am Isumi Saginomiya.
[23:33] ---
    Um, I was unable to make it
    into the main episode,
[23:37] ---
    but they have decided that
    I could be in this segment, at least.
[23:41] ---
    Um... What should I talk about?
[23:45] ---
    What? Talk about this song?
SIGN    Oh, dear
SIGN    Oh, dear
[23:47] ---
    Um... This song is...
[23:50] ---
    Hey, Isumi, keep talking that slow
    and you're going to run out of time!
[23:55] ---
    Nagi... Oh.
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    As I thought, the butler
    uniform just won't do.
[23:59] ---
    Huh? What's this?
    Am I cross-dressing again?!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    No, I was thinking you can't be dressed
    like that for the amusement park.
[24:04] ---
    Amusement park?
[24:05] ---
    I've been reborn into this invincible body!
[24:07] ---
    That debt-ridden butler's
    no match for me now!
[24:10] ---
    Hey, you there, robot!
    Whose industrial spy are you?!
[24:13] ---
    Miss Makimura! Not you, too?!
[24:16] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:18] ---
    "A Big Bother, Even for Peter".
[24:19] ---
    I feel like I've seen that robot
    somewhere before...
[24:19] ---
    A Big Bother, Even for Peter
[24:22] ---
    The power of justice
    will call forth a storm!

21 - A Big Bother, Even for Peter

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
SIGN    Pier 13 Garbage Collection Site Authorized Personnel Only
[00:27] ---
    Where am I?
[00:28] ---
    What have I...
[00:29] ---
    What in the world was I...
[00:30] ---
    This is an awfully ugly robot.
[00:33] ---
    Eight.
[00:35] ---
    I am going to fight in earnest!
[00:37] ---
    I remember now.
[00:39] ---
    I... I...
[00:42] ---
    I can't meet my end like this!
[00:46] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:49] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:52] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[00:56] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[00:59] ---
    Yes!
[01:00] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:04] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:09] ---
    That voice...
[01:10] ---
    I-It's like this enormous suffering!
[01:12] ---
    Here begins a story of science
    fiction and suspense!
[01:15] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:15] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:21] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:21] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:28] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:28] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:31] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:31] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:36] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:36] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:41] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:41] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:44] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:44] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:49] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:49] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:53] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:53] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[01:59] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[01:59] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:06] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:06] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:09] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:09] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:12] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:12] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:18] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:18] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:25] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:25] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:44] ---
    A Big Bother, Even for Peter
[02:49] ---
    As I thought, the butler
    uniform just won't do.
[02:51] ---
    Huh? Wh-What is this?
[02:53] ---
    Don't tell me... not again...
[02:55] ---
    It's settled! Metamorphosis!
[02:58] ---
    No, no, that can wait for another time.
[03:01] ---
    Another time?!
[03:02] ---
    You mean, you have plans for
    me to cross-dress again?!
[03:06] ---
    Wh-What was I thinking?!
[03:08] ---
    Yes, well, eventually.
[03:10] ---
    Depending on the ratings, it
    may get slotted in earlier.
[03:13] ---
    But that aside, for today,
[03:15] ---
    I was thinking you can't be dressed
    like that for the amusement park.
[03:19] ---
    A-Amusement park?
[03:21] ---
    So there you have it. You're
    going to change clothes!
[03:23] ---
    Help me, Maria!
[03:24] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[03:25] ---
    Wait! I can... I can change on my own!
[03:31] ---
    Ah! That looks quite good on you!
[03:33] ---
    Honestly! I'm capable of
    changing on my own, you know.
[03:37] ---
    Dressed like that, somehow it makes
    you actually look like a boy your age.
[03:42] ---
    Then we're off, Hayate.
[03:44] ---
    Oh, yes.
[03:45] ---
    Oh, Nagi, your hat.
[03:47] ---
    Aww...
[03:48] ---
    But Miss, will you be okay
    going to an amusement park?
[03:51] ---
    Huh? What do you mean?
[03:53] ---
    No, it's just that you're a
    bit of a social recluse, so...
[03:56] ---
    Don't refer to me like I'm at the
    forefront of some modern disease!
[03:59] ---
    B-But you don't like going out and stuff.
[04:02] ---
    Fool. What are you saying?
[04:04] ---
    As if I would bother to go
    out to the amusement park!
[04:07] ---
    What?
[04:14] ---
    This is within the bounds of the property.
[04:16] ---
    Mi... Mi... Mi...
[04:19] ---
    What is this, Michael Jackson's house?!
[04:21] ---
    Pow!
[04:23] ---
    See? We didn't need to actually go out.
[04:27] ---
    Well, the luxury that the Sanzenin
    family commands certainly is something.
[04:31] ---
    But there's one at Isumi's
    place and at Saku's, too.
[04:33] ---
    What are you ladies doing, getting
    them like it's a PS3 or something...
[04:38] ---
    But why this sudden visit
    to the amusement park?
[04:40] ---
    What?
[04:41] ---
    Th-That's because, you know,
    during the seaside camp,
[04:45] ---
    I didn't get to have much fun with
    you because of how things were.
[04:48] ---
    And besides, summer break's almost over
[04:50] ---
    and I-I want to enjoy it as much
    as possible, just the two of us.
[04:53] ---
    Uh, no, so... um...
[04:55] ---
    Huh?
[04:58] ---
    But I think an empty amusement
    park feels a bit sad...
[05:02] ---
    Wow! Look, look! Friends of the forest!
[05:05] ---
    What the?!
[05:05] ---
    We've got a new friend
    visiting us today, nyu!
[05:08] ---
    M-Miss, what is this?
[05:10] ---
    Well, it is an amusement park.
[05:12] ---
    It's only natural to have
    some mascot characters.
[05:14] ---
    I'm Little Kik Punch, a forest
    fairy of NagiNagiLand, nyu.
[05:19] ---
    That's not a nice name.
[05:20] ---
    Man, we haven't had a
    visitor in so long, nyu!
[05:24] ---
    Seriously... Seriously, thank you for coming!
[05:28] ---
    I mean, thank you, nyu!
[05:30] ---
    I think I just heard his true feelings...
[05:32] ---
    I-Incidentally, when was the
    last time you were here?
[05:36] ---
    Hmm, about 3 years ago, I guess?
[05:38] ---
    3 years?!
[05:39] ---
    I see, but 3 years...
[05:42] ---
    It's got to be tough for
    the people on the inside.
[05:44] ---
    There are no "people on the inside"!
[05:46] ---
    Uh, but you're wearing stuffed suits...
[05:48] ---
    I said there aren't and I meant it!
[05:49] ---
    We're fairies of the forest!
[05:51] ---
    I mean, fairies, nyu!
[05:54] ---
    Hey, kids! Here we go with
    the NagiNagi workout!
[05:58] ---
    Get over here quick
[06:00] ---
    I'm a bit mad
[06:02] ---
    Get over here quick
[06:04] ---
    But why do you have such a grand
    amusement park at your residence?
[06:04] ---
    At mach speeds
[06:07] ---
    The old geezer gave it to me
    a while back for my birthday.
[06:11] ---
    The old geezer? Oh!
[06:13] ---
    If I recall correctly, I've met him, too...
[06:20] ---
    What's wrong, Hayate?
[06:22] ---
    N-No, it's nothing.
[06:23] ---
    B-But so it was a birthday present.
[06:26] ---
    I guess your grandfather
    is quite kind to you.
[06:29] ---
    Do you really think so?
[06:31] ---
    What? He's not?
[06:32] ---
    If you think so, look carefully around you.
[06:36] ---
    Look carefully?
[06:37] ---
    In fact, all the rides
    at this amusement park...
[06:41] ---
    ...require that you're over 140cm tall!
[06:41] ---
    Must be at least 140cm tall to ride
[06:44] ---
    140cm!
[06:46] ---
    140! Got it?!
[06:47] ---
    In other words, almost none of
    the rides are available to me.
[06:51] ---
    Th-That's a horribly elaborate
    way to pick on you.
[06:54] ---
    It's inconceivable that he would do
    anything that might make me happy.
[06:58] ---
    That's why I hate him.
[07:01] ---
    The Miss is as tiny as
    ever and can't ride them,
[07:04] ---
    but you can, right?
[07:06] ---
    Everyone, come on over here!
[07:08] ---
    We've got our first visitor
    ever to ride the attractions!
[07:11] ---
    What? What?!
[07:18] ---
    H-Hayate, are you okay?
[07:20] ---
    Y-Yes.
[07:21] ---
    But if possible, I'd like
    something safer next...
[07:23] ---
    In that case, the horror house might be good.
[07:26] ---
    The horror house?
[07:28] ---
    Good idea. That won't have a
    height requirement, either.
[07:31] ---
    N-No, wh-wh-what are you saying?!
[07:33] ---
    H-H-Horror houses are... s-s-scary!
[07:37] ---
    Well, that's what they're for, after all.
[07:39] ---
    N-N-No, I'm not scared! I'll
    have you know, I'm not scared!
[07:42] ---
    It's just that, you know,
[07:43] ---
    it'd be dangerous if there's a
    hole in the floor or something!
[07:46] ---
    This is bad. At this rate, they're
    going to bypass the horror house.
[07:50] ---
    After we've practiced so hard!
[07:51] ---
    But if we're not careful and we
    make the Miss cry or something,
[07:54] ---
    we might get fired.
[07:56] ---
    We can't have that...
[07:57] ---
    I'll go check first to see if
    there's anything dangerous.
[08:01] ---
    Well, if you insist...
[08:03] ---
    Him alone?
[08:05] ---
    Entering the horror house...
[08:06] ---
    ...will be him alone!
[08:08] ---
    In that case, I can friggin' roll him!
[08:10] ---
    Y-You're going to friggin' roll him?!
[08:12] ---
    Then, I'll be going.
[08:14] ---
    B-Be careful.
[08:19] ---
    But man, the degree of
    perfection here is impressive.
[08:22] ---
    It's really amazing.
[08:25] ---
    This might make the Miss cry...
[08:33] ---
    Wh-What are you doing?!
[08:35] ---
    Well, we have to scare you.
[08:37] ---
    That'll kill me before it scares me!
[08:41] ---
    But you know...
[08:42] ---
    I'll use the back of the sword.
[08:44] ---
    That weapon doesn't have a back...
[08:48] ---
    H-Hayate!
[08:52] ---
    Given this situation, maybe
    I'll be permitted to use that!
[08:56] ---
    Please make sure to get permission for it!
[08:58] ---
    The greatest technique of Dragon Shiryu!
[09:00] ---
    Rozan!
[09:01] ---
    You're too optimistic, my dearie.
[09:01] ---
    Nope, still didn't happen
[09:06] ---
    Actually, what is this all about?!
[09:08] ---
    You're trying to make this
    look like an accident,
[09:10] ---
    but you're clearly out for blood!
[09:12] ---
    Hmm... You want to know why?
[09:15] ---
    Well...
[09:18] ---
    If I had to say, I suppose it's
    a direct grudge against you.
[09:20] ---
    Y-You're...!
[09:23] ---
    Who are you again?
[09:25] ---
    Y-You don't remember me?!
[09:28] ---
    Um, I have no idea who you might be,
[09:31] ---
    but what grudge do you have against me?
[09:33] ---
    B-Bastard! Unforgivable!
[09:35] ---
    Flip.
[09:38] ---
    I doubt you can see me in this dark!
[09:42] ---
    I'm going to get close to you now...
[09:45] ---
    D-Damn it!
[09:47] ---
    Let's see how well you hold up.
[09:51] ---
    There! We turned the lights on,
    so you won't be scared, Miss!
[09:55] ---
    Ah! This isn't scary now.
[09:57] ---
    Hayate! You're all right!
[09:59] ---
    Y-Yes.
[10:01] ---
    Who the heck is that?
[10:02] ---
    I don't know who he is or where
    he's from, but he's one ugly robot.
[10:06] ---
    Y-You...
[10:07] ---
    ...stinking brat! You, too, huh?!
[10:10] ---
    Watch out, Miss!
[10:14] ---
    Bastard! You're new here! The hell
    are you doing going after the Miss?!
[10:14] ---
    Ow! Owowowowow!
[10:15] ---
    O-Ouch! That hurts!
[10:17] ---
    Don't underestimate us! Don't
    underestimate the forest fairies!
[10:20] ---
    D-Damn it all!
[10:25] ---
    Debt-ridden butler, just you remember this!
[10:28] ---
    I'll get even with you for sure!
[10:33] ---
    Wh-What in the world was that about?
[10:36] ---
    No idea...
[10:39] ---
    Miss.
[10:41] ---
    Let us go.
[10:42] ---
    This is your precious summer break.
[10:44] ---
    Please enjoy the amusement
    park to your heart's content.
[10:47] ---
    Hayate!
[10:48] ---
    Yes! Let's go!
[10:58] ---
    I've got nothing to do.
[11:00] ---
    I haven't had a single customer.
[11:02] ---
    This break was a good opportunity,
[11:04] ---
    so I thought I might get to see
    Hayate if I worked here, but...
[11:15] ---
    Hayate, hurry, hurry! We're going
    on the merry-go-round next!
[11:18] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[11:21] ---
    Love is about passing each other by.
    To be continued in the second half.
[11:29] ---
    Finally, a group of four!
    (Tou-tou yonin gumi!)
[11:33] ---
    What animal has long ears?
    (Mimi no nagai doubutsu nanda?)
[11:39] ---
    Mikado Hyper Energy
    Fujisusono Training Grounds
[11:44] ---
    And now, we will hereby...
[11:45] ---
    ...commence the test for the
    new caregiver robot, Model 9!
[11:49] ---
    Contacts! Activate Model 9!
[11:51] ---
    Activating!
[12:03] ---
    Activate targets!
[12:06] ---
    Fire Caregiver Missiles!
[12:13] ---
    All missiles found their targets!
[12:14] ---
    Good! Fire Caregiver Laser!
[12:20] ---
    Good.
[12:21] ---
    Activate Caregiver Goldion Hammer!
[12:23] ---
    Approved!
[12:24] ---
    A sink or swim moment.
[12:26] ---
    Please wait a moment
[12:31] ---
    The experiment is a success!
[12:33] ---
    The aging population will
    have nothing to fear now.
[12:42] ---
    Chief, something moving at high
    speeds is approaching Model 9!
[12:45] ---
    "Something"?
[12:47] ---
    It's too small. I can't verify the data!
[12:51] ---
    Model 9, intercept it!
[12:55] ---
    Boost, on!
[13:05] ---
    M-My Model 9...
[13:08] ---
    All right, the control chip's mine now.
[13:12] ---
    Slot.
[13:17] ---
    Spin... Spin...
[13:19] ---
    Spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin,
    spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin!
[13:25] ---
    That debt-ridden butler's
    no match for me now!
[13:29] ---
    Hey!
[13:31] ---
    You there, robot!
[13:32] ---
    Whose industrial spy are you?!
[13:35] ---
    M-Miss Makimura!
[13:37] ---
    Don't tell me that even
    you've forgotten about me!
[13:42] ---
    Oh! Hold it right there!
[13:46] ---
    I feel like I've seen that
    robot somewhere before...
[13:51] ---
    Damn it all! Miss Makimura, wait for me!
[13:54] ---
    I'll... Without fail, I'll...
[13:56] ---
    Maria, I really, really had fun today!
[14:00] ---
    It was like Hayate went all-out,
    whoosh, and hopping with a smile!
[14:04] ---
    Yes, yes.
[14:05] ---
    Hayate really enjoyed it, too!
[14:08] ---
    It makes one happy when one does nice
    things for others, doesn't it, Maria?
[14:13] ---
    You've made yourself very clear,
    so please go to bed now.
[14:17] ---
    I wonder if Hayate is all right.
[14:20] ---
    I treated him for everything
    in general, but...
[14:24] ---
    I've burnt out.
[14:27] ---
    Into pure white ash.
[14:31] ---
    This is my chance!
[14:32] ---
    I can friggin' roll him now,
    in one fell swoop and...
[14:35] ---
    Hold it right there!
[14:36] ---
    He's mine!
[14:39] ---
    Y-You're the robot from earlier today!
[14:43] ---
    As I recall, you showed up in Episode 3.
[14:45] ---
    You're the caregiver robot, who
    was defeated by Hayate. Eight!
[14:48] ---
    Oh!
[14:49] ---
    You! You recognize me...?
[14:51] ---
    Tama, why are you the
    only one who remembered?!
[14:54] ---
    Hayate, unlike you, sitting on
    your laurels as the protagonist,
[14:58] ---
    I've watched the opening
    sequence to death every week.
[15:03] ---
    Why? Because it's the only place
    where I show up on a regular basis!
[15:07] ---
    And this Eight's in a similar situation.
[15:10] ---
    He gets no screen time, but he
    shows up in the opening sequence.
[15:12] ---
    That's why I knew!
[15:14] ---
    What? Was this robot in here?
[15:16] ---
    We haven't seen the "very generous
    people" next to him lately, either.
[15:21] ---
    Now, I'm going to get my revenge!
[15:25] ---
    The sound effects are quite thrilling.
[15:28] ---
    Wh-What could this commotion be?
[15:30] ---
    Let's leave it to Hayate.
[15:33] ---
    He's been on a roll today!
[15:34] ---
    Yay...
[15:37] ---
    R-Revenge?!
[15:39] ---
    It was all your fault for going on a rampage!
[15:42] ---
    Shut up! Because I was defeated by you, I...
[15:45] ---
    I lost everything!
[15:48] ---
    Eight, you're going to become the
    best caregiver robot in the world.
[15:53] ---
    With my creator's expectations
    riding solely on me,
[15:56] ---
    I spent day and night undergoing experiments.
[15:59] ---
    It was boring, but I did my best!
[16:01] ---
    Why? Because...
SIGN    Chief Developer Shiori Makimura 22yrs (single)
[16:03] ---
    Eight, are you doing okay?
[16:05] ---
    Yes, because I had her.
[16:08] ---
    Eight, you're amazing!
[16:11] ---
    You're so cool!
[16:12] ---
    Eight!
[16:13] ---
    Eight!
[16:14] ---
    Beet!
[16:15] ---
    That's from "Beet the Vandel Buster".
[16:16] ---
    She was everything to me.
[16:18] ---
    But on that day...
[16:20] ---
    What?! Eight was defeated
    by some scummy human?!
[16:23] ---
    And he was defeated like that?
[16:25] ---
    And my Caregiver Missiles didn't even work?
[16:27] ---
    Ch-Chief...
[16:28] ---
    Then we'll cancel the project.
[16:30] ---
    Crushed!
[16:32] ---
    The idea that we should have robots
    do everything is wrong to begin with.
[16:36] ---
    Besides, its design and functionality
    are both super lame.
[16:38] ---
    Ch-Chief!
[16:41] ---
    Thus, I lost everything
[16:43] ---
    and I ended up being disposed
    of as nonburnable trash!
[16:47] ---
    Spacey and forgetful, the Chief
    completely forgot about me
[16:50] ---
    and it seems she's been devoting herself
[16:52] ---
    to developing a new caregiver robot...
[16:55] ---
    But my... my pain will not be assuaged...
[16:59] ---
    I want to recapture her smile
    again and to do that...
[17:02] ---
    Hayate, I have to beat you and that
    stupid pigtail girl to a pulp!
[17:09] ---
    Rarrr!
[17:15] ---
    Wh-What?! You're just a pet, you bastard!
[17:18] ---
    Shut up, Scrap Sandayuu!
[17:20] ---
    The butler-in-debt's a scummy human,
    who's pitiful and boneheaded,
[17:23] ---
    and I don't care how much
    you friggin' roll him.
[17:26] ---
    But anyone who harms the Miss
    will have to answer to me!
[17:29] ---
    Sure, the Miss is spoiled,
    willful, and domineering.
[17:32] ---
    She acts on impulse and she
    never admits to being wrong.
[17:35] ---
    She's twice as stubborn as others,
    ignorant of the world, and haughty,
[17:37] ---
    and yet, her weakness is that she
    can't sleep alone in a darkened room.
[17:41] ---
    And while she insists that
    she has athletic ability,
[17:43] ---
    she actually doesn't, which all
    makes her a worthless person...
[17:48] ---
    But to me, she's the person I owe my life to.
[17:50] ---
    What's wrong, Nagi?
[17:52] ---
    Well, I don't really know,
[17:53] ---
    but I feel like something was
    said that really pisses me off...
[17:56] ---
    So, anyone who turns against the Miss...
[17:59] ---
    I'll crush them all!
[18:03] ---
    Wait!
[18:04] ---
    Hayate! Wh-Why you!
[18:07] ---
    He was out to kill you and
    you're going to protect him?!
[18:12] ---
    I know how lonely and sad
    it feels to be abandoned.
[18:17] ---
    But...
[18:18] ---
    But we had someone who
    took us in and saved us...
[18:24] ---
    That's why we're here now.
[18:27] ---
    And that goes for you, too, Tama.
[18:32] ---
    How I feel...
[18:35] ---
    You understand how I feel?
[18:39] ---
    I've experienced something similar, so...
[18:41] ---
    I see.
[18:43] ---
    If you understand how I feel,
[18:45] ---
    Hayate, let me friggin' roll
    you, right here and now!
[18:49] ---
    The sound is growing louder again.
[18:51] ---
    According to security's report,
[18:53] ---
    that caregiver robot from
    earlier has come for revenge
[18:55] ---
    and it seems to be going on a huge rampage.
[18:57] ---
    Um, are you sure we don't need to go help?
[18:59] ---
    Like Hayate would lose against
    someone he's fought before.
[19:02] ---
    But it's Version 8.1 now and
    it seems to have powered up.
[19:06] ---
    8.1? That's just a patch.
[19:09] ---
    Besides, Hayate is fighting for me, you know.
[19:13] ---
    It sort of warms your heart, doesn't it?
[19:15] ---
    I just hope he's not getting burned...
[19:19] ---
    Awaken!
[19:20] ---
    My new lethal mode that
    came with the upgrade!
[19:23] ---
    Mosquito Destroy Mode!
[19:27] ---
    The Japanese summer is
    filled with mosquitoes.
[19:30] ---
    To ensure one's owner sleeps comfortably,
[19:32] ---
    this functionality is a must.
[19:35] ---
    Um, why don't we stop right here?
[19:37] ---
    You won't be able to win
    against us like that.
[19:39] ---
    Sh-Shut up!
[19:41] ---
    No matter what it takes, I
    will once again get her to...
[19:43] ---
    Eight!
[19:44] ---
    Th-That voice... It can't be...
[19:48] ---
    Ch-Chief!
[19:49] ---
    Eight, thank goodness, you're here!
[19:52] ---
    I... I remembered you!
[19:56] ---
    S-So? What are you doing
    here after all this time?
[19:59] ---
    You already abandoned me...
[20:02] ---
    I'm sorry.
[20:03] ---
    But you're wrong about that.
[20:04] ---
    There was a little mistake...
[20:07] ---
    Chief?
[20:08] ---
    I threw you out as nonburnable
    trash without even thinking...
[20:13] ---
    I really feel bad about that.
[20:16] ---
    Chief!
[20:18] ---
    I was wrong.
[20:20] ---
    It doesn't matter now!
[20:21] ---
    Eight, you're not nonburnable trash.
[20:25] ---
    Damn, what a tearjerker!
[20:28] ---
    Yeah.
[20:29] ---
    You're oversized trash.
[20:31] ---
    What?
[20:34] ---
    Hello. We spoke on the phone?
[20:37] ---
    Oh, please take care of it.
[20:38] ---
    So this is it?
[20:39] ---
    Yes, thank you.
[20:41] ---
    Ch-Chief?
[20:42] ---
    Have you heard of the Consumer
    Electronics Recycling Law?
[20:44] ---
    Apparently, you're not allowed to just
    throw electronic appliances away.
[20:47] ---
    But don't worry.
[20:48] ---
    The workers will disassemble
    you properly to dispose of you.
[20:52] ---
    So there you have it. Bye now.
[20:55] ---
    Aren't you glad it was the Miss who found us?
[20:58] ---
    Yeah.
[20:59] ---
    But this ends on a far too dismal note!
[21:02] ---
    Oh, we have to save Eight somehow!
[21:05] ---
    But what can we possibly do?
[21:08] ---
    Leave it to me.
[21:12] ---
    Hello? Is this Makimura?
[21:13] ---
    It's me, Nagi Sanzenin.
[21:16] ---
    Listen to me. You must not heartlessly
    destroy that junky robot.
[21:20] ---
    Good.
[21:22] ---
    Just like her, right?
[21:23] ---
    What?! I had no idea you
    had such a special talent!
[21:27] ---
    Hayate! Hayate!
[21:29] ---
    Did you use stuff like Kamehameha
    to defeat your opponent yesterday?!
[21:32] ---
    No, I haven't quite gotten that far...
[21:34] ---
    Incidentally, shortly after
    leaving the residence, Eight...
[21:38] ---
    Miss Makimura, please go out with me.
[21:41] ---
    What? Sure.
[21:43] ---
    And thus, it seems he's
    moved on to a new phase.
[21:46] ---
    Next time, in pursuit of the throne
    of victory in the Fishlympics,
[21:49] ---
    they will fight the guardian of the lake!
[21:56] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:56] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:01] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:01] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:06] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:06] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:09] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:09] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:17] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:17] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:22] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:22] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:25] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:25] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:27] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:27] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:30] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:30] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:35] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:35] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:48] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:48] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:53] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:53] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:55] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:55] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:58] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:58] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful, it'll
    be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:28] ---
    ...and Isumi's...
[23:29] ---
    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    Last time, Isumi wasn't able
    to say anything about the song,
[23:34] ---
    so this time, I'm here to back her up!
[23:37] ---
    Thank you, Nagi.
[23:39] ---
    So, Isumi, this song is, you know...
[23:41] ---
    It's got your sort of dreamy feel,
    and a laid-back, mellow feel,
[23:44] ---
    plus this "boof" feel, so I think it's good.
[23:45] ---
    Oh, dear
[23:46] ---
    I am afraid that does not get
    the message across at all...
[23:50] ---
    Hm, well, you know, it's a nice song.
[23:53] ---
    Thank you, Nagi.
[23:55] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    This time, we're fishing!
    We're going to fish up tons!
[23:59] ---
    First, we'll do fly fishing!
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    Fly fishing? Aren't we starting
    with something far too advanced?
[24:03] ---
    Sanpei in "Fishing Lover Sanpei"
    was catching tons with fly fishing.
[24:06] ---
    If Sanpei could do it,
    there's no way I can't!
[24:08] ---
    Miss, it's not good to get
    manga and reality mixed up!
[24:12] ---
    I got one! I got one! I got one! Yaaah!
[24:15] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:16] ---
    "I Wonder Who Came Up with the Sound
    Effect 'Kapooon'. It's Awesome".
[24:19] ---
    I never imagined that the
    moment we were left alone,
[24:19] ---
    I Wonder Who Came Up with the Sound
    Effect 'Kapooon'. It's Awesome
[24:21] ---
    that Hayate would sidle up to me...
[24:23] ---
    The fun will be in the
    red zone again next time!
[24:25] ---
    

22 - I Wonder Who Came Up with the Sound Effect 'Kapoon'. It's Awesome

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:13] ---
    So he's out training again?
[00:16] ---
    He did say he would learn a
    lethal technique this summer,
[00:19] ---
    so he seems to be feeling the pressure a bit.
[00:19] ---
    Namidabashi
[00:24] ---
    It's so early in the morning.
[00:25] ---
    What is he? An old boxer hitting 60?
[00:28] ---
    I better work hard for Hinagiku, too.
[00:31] ---
    Yeah, you're right. For
    Hinagiku, too... Wait, what?
[00:35] ---
    But his dedication is
    what's so great about him.
[00:39] ---
    It is not great!
[00:42] ---
    Summer break is about to end soon,
[00:44] ---
    so shouldn't he want to spend more
    time with me because of that?!
[00:47] ---
    He should give a little thought to
    how Rocky felt when he lost Adrian!
[00:52] ---
    Honestly! What in the world is he thinking?
[00:55] ---
    Miss!
[00:57] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki has arrived!
[01:04] ---
    What's the big idea, Klaus?!
[01:06] ---
    Well, I thought that I should
    not let you be lonely.
[01:09] ---
    So you came up with this plan to annoy me?
[01:12] ---
    Yes!
[01:12] ---
    Mr. Klaus, isn't your character
    growing more and more distorted?
[01:15] ---
    Kinda like this?
[01:17] ---
    No, I don't mean that kind
    of character distortion.
[01:20] ---
    Besides, I am not feeling lonely.
[01:22] ---
    I am just a little bored.
[01:24] ---
    Oh-ho! If you're that bored,
[01:26] ---
    why not just take the plunge and
    establish an SOS Brigade or something?
[01:29] ---
    You shouldn't be getting anime and
    reality mixed up at your ripe old age.
[01:33] ---
    Ouch!
[01:34] ---
    Being told such a thing by the Miss...
    I cannot go on living as a human being!
[01:40] ---
    No helping it. I guess I'll
    kill time by reading manga.
[01:43] ---
    Study!
[01:44] ---
    Hayate the Combat Butler
[01:50] ---
    Fishing Lover Sanpei
[01:53] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:56] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:59] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[02:03] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[02:06] ---
    Yes!
[02:07] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[02:11] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[02:16] ---
    That was it for my screen time.
[02:19] ---
    Oh, this was Klaus.
[02:22] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[02:22] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:28] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:28] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:35] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:35] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:38] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:38] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:43] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:43] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:47] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:47] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:51] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:51] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:56] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:56] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:59] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:59] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[03:06] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[03:06] ---
    Just let it take you
[03:13] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[03:13] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[03:16] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[03:16] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[03:19] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[03:19] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:25] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:25] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:32] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:32] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:51] ---
    I Wonder Who Came Up with the Sound
    Effect 'Kapooon'. It's Awesome
[03:54] ---
    What? The Miss said that?
[03:56] ---
    She was acting quite sulky.
[03:58] ---
    That summer break is almost over, but
    you aren't paying any attention to her.
[04:02] ---
    I see.
[04:03] ---
    I've been too distracted by the
    issue of my lethal technique lately.
[04:07] ---
    Um, so, what is she doing now?
[04:09] ---
    Reading manga without studying, as always.
[04:12] ---
    Then I shall go keep her company right away.
[04:14] ---
    There's no need for that.
[04:16] ---
    What?
[04:17] ---
    Usually, after she's read some manga, she...
[04:19] ---
    Fishing Lover Sanpei
[04:21] ---
    Hayate!
[04:23] ---
    ...gets influenced by it.
[04:25] ---
    Let's go fishing!
[04:27] ---
    Huh?
SIGN    Sanzenin
    Secret Base
SIGN    Sanzenin
    Racetrack
SIGN    Sanzenin
    Residence
[04:29] ---
    Sanzenin Lake?
[04:31] ---
    Yes!
SIGN    Sanzenin
    Lake
[04:31] ---
    Sanzenin
     Dome
[04:33] ---
    Are there other lakes as well?
[04:35] ---
    Yes. It's a tiny lake, though.
    About 2km in diameter.
[04:40] ---
    I-I see.
[04:42] ---
    Tiny...
[04:43] ---
    But can you really catch fish
    in a lake on the property?
[04:47] ---
    You can.
[04:48] ---
    What?
[04:49] ---
    The water comes from a spring, so it's clean.
[04:52] ---
    And also, her grandfather brought
    fish from all over the world,
[04:56] ---
    which have created a unique ecosystem,
[04:58] ---
    so the lake is like its own little cosmos.
[05:00] ---
    It's easy to determine the dinner
    menu based on what you catch,
[05:03] ---
    so it's a very convenient lake.
[05:05] ---
    What? Does that mean...
[05:07] ---
    ...you're the one doing the fishing, Maria?
[05:09] ---
    Wait, so we're self-sufficient when
    it comes to fish dishes at this house?
SIGN    Sanzenin
    Lake
SIGN    Sanzenin
    Private Forest
SIGN    Sanzenin
     Dome
[05:17] ---
    Ah! This is quite the lake!
[05:21] ---
    It really is a nice, beautiful place.
[05:22] ---
    Now, we're going to fish like crazy!
[05:24] ---
    First, we'll do fly fishing!
[05:26] ---
    What? Fly fishing? Aren't we starting
    with something far too advanced?
[05:29] ---
    Not to worry!
[05:31] ---
    Sanpei in "Fishing Lover Sanpei"
    was catching tons with fly fishing.
[05:34] ---
    If Sanpei could do it,
    there's no way I can't!
[05:37] ---
    Miss, it's not good to get
    manga and reality mixed up.
SIGN    Not so fast!
[05:41] ---
    But well, this is an anime.
[05:42] ---
    Can't show you!
[05:44] ---
    We'll start with fishing using
    some kind of bait, like worms.
[05:47] ---
    D-Don't be ridiculous!
[05:49] ---
    Fishing using worms is scary!
[05:52] ---
    Then, instead of worms...
[05:54] ---
    ...how about some paste bait?
[05:56] ---
    What?
[05:57] ---
    In fishing,
[05:59] ---
    it begins with crucians
    and ends with crucians.
[06:02] ---
    Crucians = Crucian Carp
[06:03] ---
    Uh, could it be that you intend
    to fish as well, Maria?
[06:06] ---
    Yes, I think I'll enjoy
    fishing some crucian carp
[06:08] ---
    without having to think about
    dinner ingredients for once.
[06:11] ---
    That statement kind of muddles the issue
[06:12] ---
    as to whether the Sanzenin household
    is actually impressive or not...
[06:26] ---
    Let's see...
[06:28] ---
    First...
[06:30] ---
    Oh, paste bait.
[06:33] ---
    Hayate!
[06:33] ---
    Yes?
[06:34] ---
    I just saw something huge in the lake!
[06:36] ---
    What? "Something"? Like what?
[06:39] ---
    It's probably the guardian of
    this lake! No doubt about it!
[06:42] ---
    Oh, please.
[06:43] ---
    I'm not lying!
[06:44] ---
    Maria, is there such a thing in this...
[06:47] ---
    She looks so focused, I can't
    bring myself to disturb her.
[06:50] ---
    More like, she's scary.
[06:51] ---
    Well, that's fine.
[06:52] ---
    Hayate, you just putter around
    and catch some little fish.
[06:55] ---
    Just watch! I will go catch
    the guardian of this lake!
[06:58] ---
    Yes, yes.
[06:59] ---
    Then I think I'll use a lure.
[07:03] ---
    I'll need to watch the Miss, so she
    doesn't get tangled up in the line
[07:05] ---
    and get hurt...
[07:06] ---
    What? Pop?
[07:12] ---
    Hayate, the rod went flying.
[07:14] ---
    It's dangerous if you don't
    hold on to it tightly.
[07:18] ---
    I got one! Yaaah!
[07:25] ---
    What?
[07:25] ---
    What the?!
[07:27] ---
    Ah, quite a shapely crucian carp.
[07:29] ---
    Wow! You caught one already!
[07:32] ---
    Oh, I seem to have gotten one, too!
[07:37] ---
    Wow! Miss, this lake is really
    good for fishing for some reason!
[07:41] ---
    I-I see! Is that right?!
[07:43] ---
    All right! I'll do it, too!
[08:01] ---
    Fishing is boring.
[08:03] ---
    You got tired of it incredibly quickly.
[08:05] ---
    But my rods go flying!
[08:07] ---
    That's because you don't hold on properly.
[08:09] ---
    In that case, it might be better
    to take a boat out into the lake.
[08:14] ---
    A boat?
[08:21] ---
    We're all alone out here, Miss.
[08:24] ---
    I'm so happy, Hayate.
[08:29] ---
    But fly fishing from a boat is difficult,
[08:31] ---
    so perhaps it would be better to stay here...
[08:34] ---
    Let's go, Hayate!
[08:35] ---
    Miss?!
[08:41] ---
    Please watch closely. This is
    how you hold the rod and...
[08:48] ---
    What do you think?
[08:50] ---
    This way, you can cast properly, right?
[08:52] ---
    R-R-Right.
[08:54] ---
    B-But I never imagined that
    the moment we were left alone,
[08:57] ---
    that Hayate would sidle up to me...
[08:58] ---
    He's bolder than I thought.
[09:00] ---
    She's bound to fall off if she
    swings a rod around on the boat,
[09:03] ---
    so I need to make sure I keep her steady.
[09:08] ---
    I suppose summer is almost over.
[09:10] ---
    Y-Y-Y-Yeah...
[09:12] ---
    A lot happened this summer, didn't it?
[09:14] ---
    Like going to that seaside camp with everyone
[09:16] ---
    and going to the amusement park with you...
[09:18] ---
    T-True...
[09:20] ---
    I had intended to come up with that lethal
    technique during the summer break,
[09:24] ---
    but in the end, I was unable to do it.
[09:27] ---
    Even though you were so kind
    as to offer your assistance...
[09:31] ---
    I'm such a good-for-nothing, aren't I?
[09:32] ---
    Tha... That's not true...
[09:38] ---
    Shall we set off some sparklers
    together after this?
[09:42] ---
    Little cute ones, like you.
[09:45] ---
    But well, I hope we catch the
    guardian of the lake before that.
[09:49] ---
    I don't... really care if we
    don't catch him at this rate...
[09:52] ---
    What?
[09:54] ---
    Oh! Miss!
[09:57] ---
    You got one!
[09:59] ---
    Look, Miss! It's quite large! It just
    might be the guardian of the lake!
[10:09] ---
    Wha... What the?!
[10:18] ---
    W-Watch out, Miss!
[10:24] ---
    You idiot! Hayate, where do
    you think you're grabbing me?!
[10:26] ---
    Miss, let go of the rod!
[10:28] ---
    You're the one who should let go, you idiot!
[10:55] ---
    Are you all right?
[10:57] ---
    You really shouldn't have pushed your limits.
[10:59] ---
    You're tiny, after all.
[11:02] ---
    Shut up! Hinagiku's about the same size, too!
[11:05] ---
    Huh?
[11:06] ---
    Miss?
[11:08] ---
    Anyway, let's quickly collect
    Maria and go home...
[11:19] ---
    I told you, didn't I?
[11:21] ---
    In fishing, it begins with
    crucians and ends with crucians.
[11:24] ---
    Y-Yes, you did...
[11:26] ---
    It's the guardian...
[11:27] ---
    So, how did you catch it?
[11:32] ---
    That is classified information.
[11:34] ---
    Incidentally, they apparently released
    it because they couldn't eat it.
[11:41] ---
    I'm telling you, it's all about the crucians.
    (Dakara hera dattsuuno, hera.)
[11:46] ---
    Lucky Cha Cha Cha! No, wrong!
    (Rakkii cha cha cha! Ja nai!)
[11:57] ---
    Miss, you need to get out of
    those wet clothes quickly.
[12:01] ---
    Shut up! This all happened
    because of you, you know!
[12:04] ---
    P-Pardon me.
[12:05] ---
    You should both take a bath
    before you catch a cold.
[12:10] ---
    Y-You idiot! Take a bath
    together with Hayate?!
[12:13] ---
    Like hell I could do such
    an embarrassing thing!
[12:16] ---
    No one said anything about
    bathing together with Hayate...
[12:19] ---
    What'll I do? I've made the Miss angry again.
[12:22] ---
    Come on, Hayate, you, too.
    Don't be so depressed.
[12:25] ---
    Let's get warmed up quickly.
[12:27] ---
    Huh?
[12:28] ---
    Uh, um... When you say,
    "Let's get warmed up"...
[12:32] ---
    Could it be that you're inviting
    me to bathe with you...?
[12:35] ---
    Huh?
[12:39] ---
    Yeah, like that would happen.
[12:44] ---
    What have you been thinking about?
[12:48] ---
    I am a coward.
[12:50] ---
    What?
[12:51] ---
    Why did I act in a way that
    seemed like I was rejecting him?
[12:54] ---
    It sounds like there was yet
    another episode between these two
[12:57] ---
    that was open to misunderstanding.
[13:03] ---
    Baths are great.
[13:05] ---
    It's the crowning achievement of the
    civilization that the Lilim created.
[13:09] ---
    Monopolizing this enormous
    bath all by myself,
[13:12] ---
    I can feel all the little
    mistakes floating away from me.
[13:15] ---
    Though, it'd be even better if
    I could enjoy this with Maria.
[13:20] ---
    What?
[13:30] ---
    It can't be...
[13:31] ---
    ...Maria?
[13:40] ---
    M-Maria, this is so... bold...
[13:44] ---
    You go to such extremes to
    avoid temporary contact.
[13:47] ---
    What?!
[13:48] ---
    Are you afraid of connecting
    with other people?
[13:55] ---
    What was that for?!
[13:55] ---
    Shut up!
[13:57] ---
    So, how've you been lately?
[13:59] ---
    How have I been? Fine...
[14:02] ---
    Say, don't you think the
    water's a bit lukewarm?
[14:04] ---
    What? You think so? Isn't this about normal?
[14:06] ---
    Are you crazy?! This is totally lukewarm!
[14:08] ---
    The water's got to be hot for us Edoites!
[14:12] ---
    (Water-resistant)
[14:12] ---
    Push.
[14:18] ---
    H-Hey, are you sure about this?
[14:19] ---
    If you mess around with that stuff...
[14:21] ---
    Don't worry!
[14:22] ---
    Let's see...
[14:23] ---
    It's pretty DANGEROUS, man!
[14:24] ---
    All right, I take this and...
[14:25] ---
    Huh?
[14:26] ---
    Damn! It's hard to press with my paw!
[14:29] ---
    Hey! You shouldn't be so rough with it!
[14:36] ---
    What was that noise just now?
[14:37] ---
    I'll go check.
[14:45] ---
    Hayate?!
[14:47] ---
    We just heard a really loud noise...
[14:50] ---
    Maria...
[14:51] ---
    Crap!
[14:52] ---
    Hey! Tama!
[14:53] ---
    You're planning on running
    away by yourself, aren't you?!
[14:55] ---
    Hold it, Tama!
[14:57] ---
    Tama?
[14:57] ---
    What?
[15:00] ---
    Hey! Don't run!
[15:02] ---
    Hayate, what in the world...
[15:05] ---
    What?
[15:13] ---
    Uh, um...
[15:14] ---
    Would you like to use this for now?
[15:17] ---
    Th-Thank you...
[15:21] ---
    It's over...
[15:27] ---
    I wonder if I should apologize
    to Hayate, after all.
[15:32] ---
    And tell him I feel bad for acting
    cold towards him earlier...
[15:35] ---
    Hayate...
[15:37] ---
    Of all people, to be seen
    like that by Maria...
[15:43] ---
    Hey! Hayate!
[15:49] ---
    Hayate?
[15:54] ---
    I can't go on living at
    this residence any longer!
[15:58] ---
    What?!
[16:03] ---
    Maria...
[16:04] ---
    What'll I do?
[16:06] ---
    I never thought Hayate would
    get that depressed over me...
[16:09] ---
    At this rate, our love will come
    to an end along with the summer!
[16:12] ---
    I have to do something about it!
[16:18] ---
    Hey, there, butler-in-debt!
[16:20] ---
    What're you so down about?
[16:21] ---
    You!
[16:25] ---
    Now, now, you're still
    young. Don't brood so much.
[16:28] ---
    Whose fault do you think this is?
[16:30] ---
    Then how's about making up for it by dying?
[16:33] ---
    Isn't there something I could
    do before I consider death?
[16:35] ---
    Then how about something like this?
[16:37] ---
    Let's start by fixing the bath
    you broke along with the boiler.
[16:41] ---
    That's fine, but you're the
    one who broke everything.
[16:45] ---
    Boiler Room
    Caution: It's flammable, ya know!
[16:54] ---
    What?
[16:55] ---
    The Sanzenin residence
    boiler is powered by AKIRA?
[16:58] ---
    It's this mansion's boiler.
    It's no ordinary beast.
[17:02] ---
    Or more like,
[17:03] ---
    I see markings that clearly indicate
    messing with things will be a bad idea...
[17:06] ---
    Don't mess with things here,
    amateur. It's dangerous.
[17:09] ---
    I don't want a tiger telling me that.
[17:14] ---
    H-Hey, are you really sure about this?
[17:16] ---
    Quit your grumbling.
[17:18] ---
    Let's see...
[17:19] ---
    Is someone here?
[17:24] ---
    Maria!
[17:25] ---
    M-Meow...
[17:26] ---
    Hayate! And Tama...
[17:28] ---
    What are you doing here?
[17:30] ---
    Well, um, I thought I'd
    fix the bath that I broke,
[17:33] ---
    so I came down to the boiler room...
[17:34] ---
    Actually, what are you doing here, Maria?
[17:36] ---
    Well...
[17:38] ---
    I had the same thought
    as you to fix the bath...
[17:41] ---
    She turned away from me!
[17:43] ---
    This is terrible! She probably doesn't
    even want to see my face anymore!
[17:48] ---
    Somehow, I feel awkward seeing him
    after that episode in the bath...
[17:52] ---
    Huh?
[17:54] ---
    What?!
[17:55] ---
    Wh-Wh-What are you crying about, Hayate?!
[17:57] ---
    Because... Because I...
[18:00] ---
    Aw, man, this is kind of
    becoming a pain in the butt.
[18:03] ---
    No guy should bawl like that.
[18:05] ---
    This is the boiler, right?
[18:07] ---
    I'll fix this and get on out of here.
[18:12] ---
    Huh?
[18:13] ---
    Damn it!
[18:14] ---
    What the hell?!
[18:15] ---
    It's so hard to press with my paw!
[18:44] ---
    Maria!
[18:54] ---
    Are you all right, Maria?!
[18:57] ---
    Maria?!
[18:59] ---
    Hayate...
[19:00] ---
    We're going to drown at this
    rate, so I'll drain the water!
[19:03] ---
    What?! But how?!
[19:05] ---
    I'm going to borrow this for a bit.
[19:07] ---
    What?
[19:07] ---
    If I put a small crack in the wall,
    the water pressure should do the rest.
[19:14] ---
    We'll ride that wave.
[19:15] ---
    Hang on to me tightly!
[19:17] ---
    Hayate!
[19:18] ---
    Here we go!
[19:36] ---
    Are you all right, Maria?
[19:38] ---
    Y-Yes, somehow...
[19:41] ---
    But...
[19:43] ---
    The boiler room is a mess now...
[19:46] ---
    P-Pardon me.
[19:48] ---
    Fireworks Set for Slightly Good Kids
[19:48] ---
    Hayate!
[19:52] ---
    Hayate?! Where are you?!
[19:56] ---
    Right now, this is about all I
    can do to return his feelings,
[20:01] ---
    but someday, for sure...!
[20:10] ---
    I really am a good-for-nothing, aren't I?
[20:14] ---
    I'm always making trouble for others...
[20:17] ---
    Maybe I'm not suited to
    being a butler, after all.
[20:20] ---
    You really are a strange one.
[20:23] ---
    You're capable of doing anything flawlessly,
[20:26] ---
    but you're unable to do anything
    passably without making mistakes.
[20:30] ---
    But the way you dedicate
    yourself to these things...
[20:34] ---
    I can't say it's not appealing.
[20:39] ---
    Th-Thank you very much!
[20:41] ---
    I'll continue to work hard to
    be worthy of your kindness!
[20:44] ---
    But well, please do fix the bath.
[20:46] ---
    I will! Let me get right to it!
[20:47] ---
    Oh, it doesn't have to be now...
[21:00] ---
    M-Maria...
[21:01] ---
    Hayate...
[21:04] ---
    Ha-ya-te!
[21:14] ---
    M-Miss...
[21:16] ---
    To think you would go for Maria
    when you already have me...
[21:26] ---
    For real?!
[21:27] ---
    You despicable scoundrel!
[21:36] ---
    And thus, the butler-in-debt's
    fond summer memories
[21:38] ---
    met an untimely demise in the night sky.
[21:41] ---
    So anyway, next episode, we finally
    enter the new school term.
[21:43] ---
    He will be fighting the
    student council members
[21:45] ---
    as well as the teachers' conspiracies!
[21:50] ---
    Good show!
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful, it'll
    be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Isumi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Nagi...
[23:28] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    A good morning to yogurt! I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:34] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:35] ---
    I am Isumi Saginomiya.
[23:36] ---
    Isumi, this song is so soothing, isn't it?
[23:39] ---
    Oh, my dear Hayate!
[23:40] ---
    Hayate, you said the same
    thing to Maria, too!
[23:42] ---
    What? Did I?
[23:43] ---
    Serving as a main host in this
    segment is too much for you, Hayate!
[23:46] ---
    Pardon me, Miss.
[23:48] ---
    You both seem to having such fun.
[23:51] ---
    And so, Sakuya will be
    appearing starting next time.
[23:54] ---
    Fare-well-pickled scallions!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Nice to meet you!
[23:58] ---
    I'm Makimura and I'll be in charge
    of this class starting today.
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    What?! What's the developer of
    the caregiver robot doing here?
[24:04] ---
    This is bad. At this rate,
    my position at Hakuou...
[24:06] ---
    No, my position in this very
    anime is extremely precarious!
[24:09] ---
    So there you have it, Ayasaki!
    You're going to help me!
[24:11] ---
    No, thank you.
[24:12] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    "A Non-Kiddy Genius Teacher Appears".
[24:16] ---
    Don't get depressed, Hayata!
[24:18] ---
    You know, how do I say this?
    I like being punished, too.
[24:19] ---
    A Non-Kiddy Genius Teacher Appears
[24:22] ---
    Can you believe it?
[24:24] ---
    

23 - A Non-Kiddy Genius Teacher Appears

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:11] ---
    It goes so fast.
[00:13] ---
    The new term starts today already.
[00:15] ---
    I'd better work hard with a
    renewed sense of enthusiasm.
[00:17] ---
    A commendable attitude, as always.
[00:20] ---
    Oh, good morning, Maria.
[00:22] ---
    I'll go wake the Miss.
[00:24] ---
    Oh, there's no need for that.
[00:26] ---
    I've decided to let her stay home today.
[00:29] ---
    Oh, I see.
[00:30] ---
    Wait, what?!
[00:37] ---
    She seems to have caught a cold.
[00:40] ---
    Hayate? Are you there, Hayate?
[00:42] ---
    Y-Yes, Miss!
[00:44] ---
    I am going to school.
[00:45] ---
    You mustn't!
[00:46] ---
    Playing hooky is for when
    you're healthy and well.
[00:49] ---
    My pride as the queen of
    unproductive members of society
[00:51] ---
    will not permit me to stay
    home over a fever like this!
[00:54] ---
    There she goes spouting nonsense again.
[00:57] ---
    What are you doing, Hayate?
[00:59] ---
    Please just rest quietly.
[01:01] ---
    I'll stay home as well
    and look after you today.
[01:04] ---
    Hayate...
[01:08] ---
    You cannot!
[01:09] ---
    What?
[01:10] ---
    If you miss school with me,
    it will affect your grades.
[01:15] ---
    One day won't make that big a difference.
[01:16] ---
    You're not a super genius like me!
[01:19] ---
    The points you lose from
    missing just one day of school
[01:22] ---
    will prove fatal for a transfer
    student like you at Hakuou!
[01:26] ---
    Miss!
[01:27] ---
    Do not mind me!
[01:29] ---
    I...
[01:30] ---
    I will be fine. I will
    not be done in so easily.
[01:34] ---
    So leave this to me...
[01:36] ---
    No, Miss!
[01:38] ---
    Go, Hayate!
[01:40] ---
    Miss!
[01:40] ---
    What's up with this anime?
[01:43] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:46] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:49] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:52] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:56] ---
    Yes!
[01:57] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[02:01] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[02:05] ---
    Okay, we're going to start class!
[02:07] ---
    Miss Makimura, I have a question.
[02:08] ---
    Yes, what is it, Azumamiya?
[02:10] ---
    The Chief's so cool as a teacher, too!
[02:12] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[02:12] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:18] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:18] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:25] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:25] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:28] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:28] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:33] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:33] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:37] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:37] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:41] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:41] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:46] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:46] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:49] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:49] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:56] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:56] ---
    Just let it take you
[03:03] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[03:03] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[03:06] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[03:06] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[03:09] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[03:09] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:15] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:15] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:22] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:22] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:40] ---
    A Non-Kiddy Genius Teacher Appears
[03:48] ---
    I wonder if the Miss will be all right...
[03:51] ---
    Morning.
[03:56] ---
    Hinagiku!
[03:58] ---
    Doesn't it feel like it's been forever?
[03:59] ---
    Now that you mention it, it does.
[04:01] ---
    So, were you able to master
    your lethal technique?
[04:03] ---
    What?
[04:04] ---
    Oh, well, I made various
    efforts at it, but...
[04:07] ---
    It's okay, there's no rush.
[04:10] ---
    Thank you very much.
[04:12] ---
    So? Is Nagi playing hooky as always?
[04:15] ---
    No, that's not it.
[04:16] ---
    She's already caught her first
    cold of the school term.
[04:19] ---
    What? Oh, that's worrisome...
[04:21] ---
    Yes.
[04:22] ---
    Maybe I'll go visit her.
[04:23] ---
    Oh, please do! I'm sure
    the Miss would like that.
[04:26] ---
    Then I'll drop by for a bit after school...
[04:28] ---
    Hinaemon! Help me, Hinaemon!
[04:31] ---
    WHAM!!
[04:33] ---
    Honestly! What a racket
    so early in the morning!
[04:36] ---
    You're so mean, Hinaemon!
[04:38] ---
    You want to borrow money again, don't you?
[04:40] ---
    Do not! Big Sis has lots of
    problems other than money, too!
[04:45] ---
    Don't be proud of it!
[04:46] ---
    Um, what happened?
[04:48] ---
    So good of you to ask, Ayasaki!
[04:51] ---
    You see, there's a new teacher coming in,
[04:53] ---
    so I got demoted from homeroom teacher
    to assistant homeroom teacher!
[04:57] ---
    A new teacher?
[05:01] ---
    Shiori Makimura
[05:01] ---
    Nice to meet you!
[05:02] ---
    I'm Makimura and I'll be in charge
    of this class starting today.
[05:05] ---
    What?!
[05:07] ---
    I look forward to teaching you!
[05:10] ---
    Hmm, Miss Makimura, huh?
[05:12] ---
    I just hope she's easier than Yukiji.
[05:14] ---
    Well, I don't really care.
[05:16] ---
    Why? What's the creator of the
    caregiver robot doing here?
[05:20] ---
    I'll explain then.
[05:22] ---
    Model 7, Model 8, Model 9,
    10, Model 11, and Model 12...
[05:26] ---
    Every unit has gone berserk
[05:28] ---
    or was seriously damaged
    and went up in flames.
[05:31] ---
    I see...
[05:32] ---
    Makimura, what are your thoughts on this?
[05:36] ---
    Um... Um...
[05:38] ---
    Not enough firepower?
[05:40] ---
    What would be the point in
    causing more explosions?!
[05:42] ---
    I-I'm sorry!
[05:45] ---
    Do you know what's the most
    important thing to a scientist?
[05:49] ---
    The most important thing?
[05:51] ---
    That's right. The important thing
    as a person who makes things.
[05:55] ---
    Naturally, that's...
[05:56] ---
    Oh, I know! Cake! It's cake, isn't it?!
[06:00] ---
    Sweet things are important for your brain.
[06:02] ---
    Yup! Exactly! Because it
    stimulates the pleasure center
[06:04] ---
    and releases endorphin
    into the brain! Wait...
[06:08] ---
    WRONG!
[06:11] ---
    It's heart!
[06:12] ---
    As a person, the most important
    thing is to have heart
[06:14] ---
    and you are definitely lacking in that area!
[06:17] ---
    Makimura, in order to have you
    learn what heart is about,
[06:20] ---
    I am going to have you teach at
    Hakuou Academy, your alma mater.
[06:24] ---
    What?
[06:26] ---
    Well? Do you understand the situation now?
[06:28] ---
    Hayate and you, there, sitting
    in front of the television!
[06:31] ---
    Yes, sort of.
[06:33] ---
    But the way Miss Katsura
    is looking at Miss Makimura
[06:37] ---
    seems tremendously scary to me...
[06:39] ---
    Everyone, let's work hard again
    today with big smiles on our faces!
[06:42] ---
    Hah! What's with her?!
[06:43] ---
    Now, I want to know what level you're at,
[06:44] ---
    There's no way she can
    win them over so easily!
[06:48] ---
    so I'd like to give you a pop test!
[06:51] ---
    What? Is she serious?
[06:53] ---
    This sucks!
[06:56] ---
    Oh, dear. This is a bit of a pickle.
[06:59] ---
    I've won!
[07:00] ---
    The students won't go along with such
    hardcore methods right off the bat!
[07:05] ---
    Okay, time's up! Please
    collect them in order.
[07:08] ---
    That was pretty hard, wasn't it?
[07:10] ---
    Give us a break.
[07:13] ---
    I think it's about time
[07:14] ---
    for me to show off the popularity
    of the veteran teacher.
[07:18] ---
    Man, good work, everyone!
[07:20] ---
    It wasn't fair to spring a test
    on you right after summer break.
[07:23] ---
    I totally understand how you all feel!
[07:26] ---
    So, an average score of 82.3...
[07:30] ---
    You're all so smart.
[07:32] ---
    Miss Segawa and Miss Hanabishi,
    you seem to miscalculate a lot.
[07:35] ---
    Miss Asakaze, your weak
    point is story problems.
[07:37] ---
    And Ayasaki, you've got
    the fundamentals down.
[07:41] ---
    Um, Miss Makimura, what
    are you talking about?
[07:44] ---
    What do you mean? I'm just
    announcing the test results...
[07:48] ---
    Wait! Do I have to mark everything
    with a red pen when grading?!
[07:53] ---
    Oh, no! What a pain!
[07:55] ---
    Oh, I know! Miss Katsura,
    could I ask you to do that?
[07:59] ---
    I'll be counting on you.
[08:01] ---
    Wait, why should I have to...?!
[08:03] ---
    Miss Makimura!
[08:04] ---
    I have a question about Problem 2!
[08:06] ---
    Miss Makimura, please teach me how
    to get the solution to Problem 5!
[08:15] ---
    Um...
[08:16] ---
    I see.
[08:17] ---
    Her intelligence is on the
    order of a supercomputer.
[08:19] ---
    It's no surprise that Katsy got demoted.
[08:23] ---
    Farewell, Yukiji.
[08:24] ---
    I wish you well, even after
    you've quit teaching.
[08:26] ---
    Like hell I'm quitting!
[08:30] ---
    Goodbye, Miss Makimura!
[08:32] ---
    Bye-bye!
[08:35] ---
    This is bad...
[08:36] ---
    At this rate, my position at Hakuou...
[08:38] ---
    No, my position in this very
    anime is extremely precarious!
[08:42] ---
    I have to do something about
    this as soon as possible.
[08:45] ---
    But what?
[08:47] ---
    It's finally over.
[08:49] ---
    School seems so dull without the Miss around.
[08:53] ---
    Hayata!
[08:56] ---
    Here, the printouts from today.
[08:58] ---
    Make sure you give them to Little Nagi, okay?
[09:01] ---
    Oh, thank you very much!
[09:03] ---
    You owe me one now.
[09:05] ---
    But why are you doing this?
[09:07] ---
    Why? But of course!
[09:09] ---
    It's because Izumi is the committee
    chairman of this class!
[09:12] ---
    Committee chairman?
[09:14] ---
    Oh! You're the student council
    committee chairman, right?
[09:19] ---
    Hayata, I am the leader of this class.
[09:23] ---
    We can't have you forgetting that.
[09:25] ---
    That's right. She's Red.
[09:28] ---
    Miss Committee Chairman,
[09:30] ---
    Red!
[09:32] ---
    And I am Blue.
[09:34] ---
    The vice chairman of this class, Blue!
[09:38] ---
    Furthermore, who knows? Friend or foe?
[09:40] ---
    Disciplinary committee member, Black!
[09:44] ---
    Together, the three of us are...
[09:45] ---
    Hakuou Sword
[09:45] ---
    ...the student council officers!
[09:50] ---
    That's great. Sounds like fun.
[09:52] ---
    And now, Hayata, we'll specially present you
[09:54] ---
    with the designation of Ocher,
    which is currently available.
[09:58] ---
    No, thank you, I'll decline.
[10:00] ---
    But doesn't student council
    work keep you rather busy?
[10:04] ---
    Aw, not really.
[10:06] ---
    Even if we do a so-so job,
[10:08] ---
    our absolutely perfect student body
    president will handle it for us.
[10:11] ---
    That about sums it up.
[10:12] ---
    Bwahahaha
[10:13] ---
    Hinagiku really has it rough.
[10:15] ---
    But I guess being committee
    chairman can be a pain sometimes.
[10:16] ---
    Report
[10:19] ---
    For example, there's this Class Report.
[10:21] ---
    It has to be submitted by the end of the day.
[10:22] ---
    Wow! There's so much to fill out!
[10:25] ---
    But it's no problemo!
[10:27] ---
    These are the times when the three of us,
    Red, Blue, and Black, join forces and...
[10:33] ---
    O-Ocher! L-Let the two
    of us join forces and...!
[10:38] ---
    I understand. I am not Ocher, but I'll help.
[10:42] ---
    Oh, there you are! Ayasaki, would
    you come with me for a sec?!
[10:47] ---
    Just hurry!
[10:51] ---
    What about the Report?!
[10:55] ---
    Hehehe, I love apples.
    (Ihihihi, ringo daisuki.)
[10:59] ---
    Your villainy is known to us!
    (Kisama no akuji minuitari!)
[11:04] ---
    Miss Katsura, what in the world?!
[11:06] ---
    Okay!
[11:08] ---
    Listen to me, Ayasaki. Stand
    right there for a while.
[11:12] ---
    What is this about, Miss Katsura?
[11:14] ---
    Would you like to know my
    thoroughly calculated strategy?
[11:17] ---
    Strategy?
[11:19] ---
    I'll make an exception and explain it to you.
[11:21] ---
    First, that woman will come
    out of the faculty office.
[11:24] ---
    And I'll place this Gundam model there!
[11:25] ---
    Then...
[11:27] ---
    Oh! My hand-made Nightingale that's
    more important than my own life!
[11:32] ---
    How dare you?!
[11:34] ---
    But in her path will be...
[11:37] ---
    SIGN: Wet Rag
[11:37] ---
    And I'll follow up on that!
SIGN    Hayate
[11:42] ---
    Makimura
[11:47] ---
    If I spread photos like that,
    she's sure to be forced to quit!
[11:52] ---
    Do you understand this
    masterful plan of mine now?
[11:55] ---
    I understand that you're
    not right in the head.
[11:59] ---
    What did you say?!
[12:01] ---
    Please excuse me.
[12:02] ---
    Wait!
[12:03] ---
    Students have to listen
    to what a teacher says!
[12:06] ---
    Please let go of me!
[12:08] ---
    I don't want to help with such a childish
    Kasukabe Defense Force-like plot!
[12:12] ---
    Just shut up and work with me!
[12:14] ---
    I don't want to!
[12:17] ---
    Um, is something the matter?
[12:22] ---
    I heard something about a plot...?
[12:25] ---
    N-No, um, so...
[12:28] ---
    I was teaching him that at the station,
    you wait behind the plot line.
[12:31] ---
    Wait, that's not "plot
    line"! That's "white line"!
[12:33] ---
    Oh, what fun! What fun!
[12:36] ---
    Come on! You say something
    smooth to back me up, too!
[12:39] ---
    Go on!
[12:48] ---
    Heaven is on my side!
[12:50] ---
    I never imagined I'd get
    such a photo by accident.
[12:54] ---
    I have to hurry and post this on
    all the school bulletin boards!
[12:56] ---
    Hey! What are you thinking?!
[13:01] ---
    I will become the god of the new world!
[13:05] ---
    N-No, there's no reason to panic!
[13:07] ---
    We just have to explain that
    it's a total misunderstanding!
[13:11] ---
    Isn't that right, Miss Makimura?
[13:13] ---
    After what was done to me...
[13:15] ---
    I'm ruined for marriage now!
[13:17] ---
    No! Not like that!
[13:23] ---
    This will be embarrassing for the Miss...
[13:26] ---
    Did you know? Miss Sanzenin's butler was...
[13:29] ---
    No way! That's terrible!
[13:32] ---
    I must protect the Miss's
    honor, no matter what!
[13:36] ---
    Right around then, not knowing any
    of this at the Sanzenin residence...
[13:41] ---
    I'm relieved to see you doing
    better than I expected.
[13:44] ---
    Yes, my fever is completely gone now, too.
[13:47] ---
    That reminds me, what did
    you do during summer break?
[13:50] ---
    What?
[13:51] ---
    I enjoyed it pretty fully.
[13:54] ---
    First, I went to a fireworks
    festival with Hayate.
[13:56] ---
    Then, I went to the seaside camp with Hayate,
[13:59] ---
    I went to the amusement park with
    Hayate, and I went fishing with Hayate.
[14:02] ---
    Also, with Hayate...
[14:05] ---
    Is something the matter?
[14:07] ---
    Nothing, it's just that you
    sound so happy talking about it.
[14:10] ---
    What? I-It's not that big a deal...
[14:14] ---
    Come on, tell me more.
[14:16] ---
    Sure! And I also played
    lots of games with Hayate!
[14:20] ---
    Oh, that's right. I also watched
    "Soft Tank" with Hayate, too. And...
[14:21] ---
    A lively chat about summer memories.
[14:26] ---
    Miss Katsura, please wait!
[14:30] ---
    Like hell I gotta, panna cotta!
[14:36] ---
    Haha! Bye-bye!
[14:45] ---
    I'm going to take it from you,
    even if I have to do it by force!
[14:56] ---
    Aw, man, I never did get to see
    Hayate during summer break.
[15:06] ---
    Wh-Why?
[15:12] ---
    Why don't you think about giving up soon?
[15:15] ---
    You're awfully persistent yourself.
[15:25] ---
    Oh! I found you, Hayata! Gotcha!
[15:28] ---
    SIGN: Report
[15:28] ---
    You're awful! You said you'd
    help me write the Report!
[15:33] ---
    Miss Segawa! You've come at the perfect time!
[15:36] ---
    Please take out the memory
    card from that camera!
[15:40] ---
    What photos are on here?
[15:42] ---
    Photos of Ayasaki tied up with rope
    and looking like he's in ecstasy!
[15:46] ---
    Please don't make stuff up!
[15:48] ---
    I knew it. So you do have a
    taste for that sort of thing.
[15:51] ---
    What?
[15:52] ---
    You're kind of girly, so I thought
    you might like being punished.
[15:57] ---
    What?! Since when did my
    character get that reputation?
[15:59] ---
    Don't get so depressed, Hayata!
[16:03] ---
    You know, how do I say this?
    I like being punished, too.
[16:07] ---
    What?
[16:08] ---
    Oh, no! I didn't mean it like that!
[16:10] ---
    Sheesh! Now Hayata thinks I'm a
    weird girl because of you, Katsy!
[16:15] ---
    I cannot let you get away with this now!
[16:17] ---
    Oh-ho. Then what will you do?
[16:20] ---
    I am going to take this memory card.
[16:25] ---
    This is the end of the line for you.
[16:31] ---
    If you'll take my side,
[16:33] ---
    I'll help you with all of your
    homework for the next 3 months!
[16:39] ---
    There's no way you can
    win her over like that...
[16:42] ---
    Here you are.
[16:43] ---
    The deal is sealed!
[16:44] ---
    What?!
[16:46] ---
    Sorry about that, Hayata.
[16:50] ---
    And away I go!
[16:57] ---
    You're...!
[17:02] ---
    Uh...
[17:04] ---
    And who might you be?
[17:09] ---
    Are you the one who made my sweet honey cry?
[17:13] ---
    N-No, I'm not!
[17:16] ---
    I-It was him! Him!
[17:19] ---
    Eight!
[17:20] ---
    Eight!
[17:23] ---
    I'm so sorry, Eight.
[17:24] ---
    For acting in a way that
    betrayed you, my lover...
[17:27] ---
    Like I said, nothing happened!
[17:30] ---
    Actually, wait, when did you two get
    into that kind of relationship?!
[17:33] ---
    Unforgivable!
[17:43] ---
    Interesting!
[17:45] ---
    You've made me get serious!
[17:47] ---
    If you've got a fight for me, I'm
    buying, even if I have to go into debt!
[17:49] ---
    Why does it end up that way?
[17:56] ---
    And she's fighting him like an equal, too!
[17:59] ---
    Why you!
[18:00] ---
    Watch out!
[18:07] ---
    You're pretty good.
[18:09] ---
    Same to you, too!
[18:11] ---
    Please stop! Don't fight for me!
[18:14] ---
    Wow, I wonder how it's going to end!
[18:16] ---
    So thrilling! So exciting!
[18:22] ---
    What should I do?
[18:25] ---
    Don't Push
[18:25] ---
    Any way you slice it, that's
    a self-destruct button.
[18:28] ---
    All right! If I just push that...
[18:30] ---
    Oh, but no! I can't do that!
[18:33] ---
    If I push that button now, there
    will be a humongous blast!
[18:37] ---
    When that happens...
[18:42] ---
    When that happens, Miss Segawa will be...
[18:44] ---
    It's no problem, Hayata.
[18:46] ---
    Uh, but with someone in
    a skirt nearby... um...
[18:51] ---
    Oh!
[18:54] ---
    I wear bike shorts under it like
    Hina, so it's totally okay.
[18:58] ---
    Thank you, bike shorts!
[19:04] ---
    Blown to smithereens!
[19:15] ---
    Eight...
[19:18] ---
    So futile... This is so terribly futile.
[19:21] ---
    What?
[19:22] ---
    But I mean, isn't that right?
[19:23] ---
    Fighting doesn't give rise to anything!
[19:26] ---
    Miss Katsura...
[19:28] ---
    Everything that happened is all his fault.
[19:33] ---
    But I'm begging you!
[19:34] ---
    Please... Please, for my sake,
    as his teacher, forgive him!
[19:40] ---
    You see, adolescent boys are really
    bad at controlling their emotions.
[19:45] ---
    And it's my role as a teacher
    to guide and instruct them.
[19:49] ---
    At times, the way they're
    almost painfully delicate
[19:52] ---
    is heartbreaking and agonizing,
    and you hit a wall sometimes...
[19:55] ---
    But I will never turn away from them!
[19:59] ---
    Because... Because I'm a
    teacher! Because I love them!
[20:06] ---
    Miss Katsura! I... I finally understand!
[20:09] ---
    That it's important to have heart!
[20:12] ---
    Miss Makimura...
[20:13] ---
    I admire you, Miss Katsura!
[20:15] ---
    I want to become like you, too!
[20:18] ---
    Really? But the path of a
    teacher is fraught with peril.
[20:21] ---
    You still have a lot to learn.
[20:25] ---
    I am ready to face it!
[20:27] ---
    All right. If you're
    prepared to go that far...
[20:31] ---
    Starting today, I'll hold
    study sessions for you!
[20:34] ---
    Mainly at pubs! For about the
    difference between the salaries
[20:37] ---
    of a homeroom teacher and
    an assistant teacher!
[20:39] ---
    My! How reassuring you are!
[20:42] ---
    Just as I planned!
[20:45] ---
    And thus...
[20:49] ---
    I know a good place that I go to often.
[20:51] ---
    Hey, sounds good!
[20:53] ---
    ...the ultimate battle of clever
    strategies came to an end.
[20:56] ---
    Leaving the butler-in-debt behind,
[20:58] ---
    thinking about how there
    are all kinds of smarts.
[21:02] ---
    What was all the trouble I went through for?
[21:05] ---
    Now, now. The Report got written
    without any mishap, too,
[21:08] ---
    so it's a happy ending.
[21:14] ---
    Th-This is...
[21:16] ---
    I played with Hayata and the others
    today and it was a lot of fun!
SIGN    I played with Hayata and the others today and it was a lot of fun! P.S. Sorry, Hina. I'll leave the rest to you!!
[21:20] ---
    That's a journal entry!
[21:23] ---
    Cheers!
[21:25] ---
    Oh, that's right. Miss Katsura, we'll
    be counting on you to pay the bill.
[21:28] ---
    What?!
[21:30] ---
    I mean, you are older and also
    senior to me as a teacher.
[21:32] ---
    Thanks for treating.
[21:34] ---
    What?!
[21:35] ---
    Doooom
[21:37] ---
    You reap what you sow.
[21:38] ---
    Humans are so interesting.
[21:40] ---
    Next time is a must-see for girls, too!
[21:42] ---
    He will be fighting his
    numerous appealing qualities!
[21:46] ---
    I had very little screen
    time in this episode!
[21:48] ---
    Now, now, that's going to
    happen once in a while.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful, it'll
    be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    I love you to Earth! I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:32] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    Nice to see ya again! It's
    Sakuya. How've ya been?
[23:36] ---
    But this sure is a girlish song, quite
    different from your image, Saku.
[23:40] ---
    Do you think so?
[23:41] ---
    I believe the powerful tone of
    this song fits Sakuya perfectly.
[23:44] ---
    What's with the two of ya?
    Makin' these random comments...
[23:46] ---
    The truth is, ya hadn't heard the
    song yet when ya recorded this.
[23:49] ---
    Whoa, she went and said it!
[23:50] ---
    The director and the staff're in a bind,
[23:52] ---
    so I'm beggin' ya, Geneon, get the
    songs in as early as ya can...
[23:54] ---
    See you again next time!
[23:55] ---
    Hey, what're ya doin'?!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    My dear Hayate, you seem
    rather happy for some reason.
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    I am. A certain person thanked me.
[24:03] ---
    Oh, my.
[24:04] ---
    With the string of mishaps and people
    giving me unfriendly looks lately,
[24:07] ---
    I'd been feeling a bit down, so...
[24:09] ---
    My dear Hayate.
[24:10] ---
    Yes?
[24:11] ---
    I want you to know that I
    love you, my dear Hayate.
[24:14] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:15] ---
    "I've Never Had the Trouble
    of Being Too Popular".
[24:18] ---
    When I saw them yesterday, it looked
    to me like they were embracing, but...
[24:19] ---
    I've Never Had the Trouble
     of Being Too Popular
[24:22] ---
    Om Shura Sowaka!
[24:24] ---
    

24 - I've Never Had the Trouble of Being Too Popular

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:11] ---
    Shoot!
[00:15] ---
    SIGN: Little Haruhi's U2
[00:17] ---
    What is the matter?
[00:18] ---
    I forgot to return this
    DVD to Wataru's store.
[00:21] ---
    Then I shall go return it.
[00:23] ---
    How long have you had it?
[00:26] ---
    Roughly 2 years.
[00:27] ---
    What?!
[00:28] ---
    No, it may be closer to 3 years by now.
[00:36] ---
    Hurrying at this point is moot, but
    I just have to get this returned.
[00:42] ---
    Why a potted plant?!
[00:52] ---
    I have a feeling luck's not with me today...
[00:55] ---
    Closed due to special circumstances
[00:56] ---
    Luck really isn't with me today...
[00:58] ---
    But then, it's not like
    anything unfortunate happened.
[01:13] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:16] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:19] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:22] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[01:26] ---
    Yes!
[01:27] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[01:31] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[01:35] ---
    The Young Sir does not understand
    what is in a woman's heart.
[01:38] ---
    Honestly! Young Sir, you cur!
[01:39] ---
    Teehee.
[01:42] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[01:42] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[01:48] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[01:48] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:55] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:55] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:58] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:58] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:03] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:03] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:07] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:07] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:11] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:11] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:16] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:16] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:19] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:19] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[02:26] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[02:26] ---
    Just let it take you
[02:33] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[02:33] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[02:36] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[02:36] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[02:39] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[02:39] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[02:45] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[02:45] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:52] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:52] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:11] ---
    I've Never Had the Trouble
    of Being Too Popular
[03:14] ---
    I have returned.
[03:17] ---
    I'm sorry, Hayate! That DVD was actually...
[03:20] ---
    My apologies. Wataru's
    store was closed today,
[03:23] ---
    so I left it in the return box.
[03:25] ---
    Oh, no, about that...
[03:27] ---
    Oh, welcome!
[03:29] ---
    Hello.
[03:30] ---
    Shoot! I let my guard down
    and didn't prep a joke!
[03:33] ---
    To what do we owe the pleasure today?
[03:35] ---
    You have to ask "to what"?!
[03:36] ---
    I came to check on Nagi, 'cause I heard
    she hasn't been to school at all!
[03:39] ---
    Now that you mention it!
[03:40] ---
    No more of this needless conversation!
[03:42] ---
    The wonderful tea will get cold!
[03:45] ---
    It's ice tea!
[03:47] ---
    The lingering summer heat is
    still ruthless, after all.
[03:49] ---
    True.
[03:51] ---
    Considering how hot it is now in September,
[03:52] ---
    I wonder how hot it'll get
    in October and November.
[03:55] ---
    Why would ya wonder that?!
[03:58] ---
    But that was good. Keep it up!
[04:00] ---
    Having said that, it's
    actually autumn already.
[04:03] ---
    When it comes to autumn,
    it's the season of eating.
[04:05] ---
    Yes, yes, because it's the season
    where you get beat a lot.
[04:08] ---
    Autumn, the season of beating!
[04:09] ---
    Just kidding.
[04:14] ---
    Falter and ya lose!
[04:17] ---
    Have confidence in yer own material!
[04:19] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am.
[04:20] ---
    Speaking of which...
[04:23] ---
    Ya got a new openin' line?
[04:25] ---
    Opening line?
[04:25] ---
    Or is it a new careless thing you did?
[04:27] ---
    Yes, my stole...
[04:31] ---
    Your stole?
[04:32] ---
    Yes.
[04:34] ---
    It is a new stole, but
    somewhere, I carelessly...
[04:38] ---
    You left it and forgot it?
[04:39] ---
    Oh, then I'll go look for it.
[04:42] ---
    Oh, no, I do not really care
    if it is lost for good.
[04:45] ---
    It only cost about 50 million yen, so...
[04:48] ---
    I'll go look for it right
    away, on the double!
[04:50] ---
    He is such a kind person.
[04:52] ---
    Well, of course! My Hayate is the
    world's most kind and dependable man!
[05:00] ---
    As I recall, Isumi was resting
    in the guest bedroom.
[05:07] ---
    Today sure was rough.
[05:08] ---
    It's best to sleep on days like this.
[05:10] ---
    Ooh!
[05:11] ---
    And right as I was saying that,
[05:13] ---
    here's a stole that'll
    make the perfect blanket!
[05:16] ---
    Let's see...
[05:17] ---
    I think I'll pick it up with
    these claws that shred cloth!
[05:20] ---
    No, Tama! That stole cost 50 million and...
[05:23] ---
    Don't touch Isumi's stole!
[05:26] ---
    Thinking of touching Isumi's personal
    belonging, when you're only a pet?!
[05:29] ---
    You've got some nerve!
[05:29] ---
    Wataru? When did he get here?
[05:30] ---
    Sheesh!
[05:32] ---
    Even I don't often get to touch
    Isumi's personal belongings...
[05:35] ---
    Her personal belonging...
[05:47] ---
    Wataru?
[05:48] ---
    What are you...?
[05:50] ---
    H-How long have you been
    there, you butler-in-debt?!
[05:53] ---
    I've been here the whole time...
[05:55] ---
    D-Did you see that just now?!
[05:56] ---
    By "that just now", do you mean...
[05:58] ---
    S-S-So, you know...!
[05:59] ---
    Oh, that almost pathological
    behavior unique to adolescents
[06:02] ---
    where you happen to come upon
    an object that was worn by the
[06:05] ---
    girl you like and you get
    the urge to sniff it?
[06:11] ---
    That's normal when you consider
    what 13-year-olds do.
[06:14] ---
    You gonna tell them?
[06:16] ---
    Huh?
[06:16] ---
    Like tell Nagi and Isumi what you saw?!
[06:19] ---
    Not to worry.
[06:20] ---
    What?
[06:20] ---
    A Sanzenin butler does not do things
    that would embarrass a guest.
[06:31] ---
    But a Sanzenin pet would do things
    that would embarrass a guest.
[06:35] ---
    You bastard tiger!
[06:36] ---
    Tama, you...!
[06:38] ---
    Wait, weren't you not going to speak,
    because it would ruin your image?!
[06:42] ---
    It's for the girls that I
    don't want to ruin my image.
[06:43] ---
    Good grief
[06:45] ---
    In fact, I want to ruin my image for boys!
[06:48] ---
    Rarr! Rarr! Rarr!
[06:48] ---
    This anime is geared towards boys, though...
[06:51] ---
    So, I'm gonna get right to
    telling the young ladies
[06:54] ---
    about this stinking brat's weird behavior
[06:55] ---
    using a dying message from Conan!
[06:57] ---
    W-Wait, if Isumi finds out, I'll...
[07:02] ---
    I had no idea Wataru was
    that kind of person!
[07:04] ---
    How filthy!
[07:06] ---
    He is worse than an insect!
[07:11] ---
    Not to worry. Please leave the rest to me.
[07:14] ---
    Th-Thanks, butler-in-debt.
    I'll be counting on you.
[07:17] ---
    Yes, sir. Incidentally, what
    are you doing here, Wataru?
[07:20] ---
    What?
[07:21] ---
    Oh, I'm here because that
    idiot Nagi returned a DVD
[07:24] ---
    that I'd gone to the
    trouble of giving to her.
[07:27] ---
    So I came to give it to her again.
[07:29] ---
    What?
[07:30] ---
    Oh, I'm so glad! Then...
[07:36] ---
    All right! First, I'll
    spread the rumor on the net
[07:38] ---
    and build it up so the Miss hears about it.
[07:41] ---
    I've started numerous threads
    that went on to become famous.
[07:45] ---
    No worries! I can do this!
[07:47] ---
    I'll build up the hype myself
    by using different IPs
[07:48] ---
    and make the thread really popular.
[07:54] ---
    Tama, enough with making
    trouble for our guests!
[07:59] ---
    Or I will show you no mercy,
    even if you are the Miss's pet.
[08:04] ---
    Y-Yessir!
[08:07] ---
    It seems Tama has reconsidered.
[08:09] ---
    But I still can't face Isumi,
    so you give it to her for me.
[08:13] ---
    I understand.
[08:15] ---
    Also, um...
[08:17] ---
    Thank you for helping me.
[08:20] ---
    Not at all. I am honored to be of service.
[08:23] ---
    Then please excuse me.
[08:27] ---
    Ayasaki Hayate... If I
    could be a man like him...
[08:31] ---
    Little Wataru kept his steady
    gaze on Hayate's back...
[08:36] ---
    Here you are, Isumi. Your stole.
[08:38] ---
    Aren't you glad he was
    able to find it, Isumi?
[08:40] ---
    Yes, it is all thanks to my dear Hayate.
[08:47] ---
    That reminds me, where's Sakuya?
[08:49] ---
    She left just earlier,
[08:52] ---
    complaining she had no one to make jabs at.
[08:55] ---
    Then, I shall be taking
    my leave soon as well.
[08:59] ---
    Well, please be very
    careful on your way home.
[09:03] ---
    My dear Hayate, you seem
    rather happy for some reason.
[09:06] ---
    I am. A certain person thanked
    me for a little something.
[09:10] ---
    Oh, my.
[09:11] ---
    I've had a string of mishaps lately, so...
[09:14] ---
    Like this morning, I got ran over by a truck
[09:15] ---
    and people were giving me unfriendly looks...
[09:18] ---
    It made me feel a bit down...
[09:22] ---
    Oh...
[09:24] ---
    But I think it was just
    my imagination, after all.
[09:26] ---
    Unfortunate things have happened
    to me ever since I was little,
[09:28] ---
    so I think it was just a coincidence.
[09:29] ---
    My dear Hayate.
[09:31] ---
    Yes?
[09:32] ---
    What?
[09:39] ---
    What?!
[09:41] ---
    I-Isumi?!
[09:43] ---
    Smooch.
[09:47] ---
    Uh, um...
[09:48] ---
    This is my thanks for the stole.
[09:50] ---
    What?
[09:50] ---
    I think this will make
    things somewhat better.
[09:55] ---
    Then, good day to you.
[09:57] ---
    I want you to know that I
    love you, my dear Hayate.
[10:01] ---
    What?!
[10:12] ---
    The romantic comedy turn
    of events to be continued!
[10:18] ---
    Real love.
    (Riaru rabu.)
[10:22] ---
    Brassiere complex!
    (Burajaa konpurekkusu.)
[10:38] ---
    I-Isumi...
[10:40] ---
    I want you to know that I
    love you, my dear Hayate.
[10:51] ---
    A dream...
[10:55] ---
    I know! Maybe it's just that kids love me!
[10:58] ---
    It turns out that we have
    a wholesome protagonist,
[11:00] ---
    who doesn't consider kids to
    be possible romantic partners.
[11:11] ---
    Have you been awake this whole time?
[11:13] ---
    Yes...
[11:19] ---
    When I saw them yesterday, it looked
    to me like they were embracing, but...
[11:25] ---
    What in the world was that?
[11:27] ---
    If it bothers you that much,
    why not ask them yourself?
[11:31] ---
    But...
[11:32] ---
    If I ask and Isumi really does love Hayate...
[11:38] ---
    With Hayate already in love with
    me, it would mean hurting Isumi.
[11:45] ---
    I-I see...
[11:47] ---
    But it may be some kind of misunderstanding.
[11:50] ---
    There is a high probability that
    Isumi has fallen in love with Hayate.
[11:54] ---
    After all, Hayate is the
    coolest man in the universe.
[11:57] ---
    Whoa...
[11:59] ---
    Then it will be a serious problem
[12:01] ---
    if the coolest man in the universe
    were making a pass at Isumi.
[12:03] ---
    That would never happen!
[12:05] ---
    For Hayate to pursue some
    girl other than me...
[12:08] ---
    For him to make a pass at Isumi...
[12:10] ---
    For him to fall for some other girl...
[12:13] ---
    Such a thing...
[12:16] ---
    I-I'm going to go see Hayate!
[12:18] ---
    A-All right.
[12:21] ---
    Hayate!
[12:22] ---
    Wh-Wha?!
[12:23] ---
    What is it, Miss?!
[12:25] ---
    I have a little question for you!
[12:27] ---
    Y-Yes, Miss?
[12:28] ---
    Hayate, do you, um... love Isumi?!
[12:31] ---
    What?
[12:37] ---
    Yes.
[12:39] ---
    I do love Isumi.
[12:43] ---
    A-Are you serious?
[12:44] ---
    Yes!
[12:45] ---
    Are you seriously in love with Isumi?!
[12:48] ---
    What?
[12:49] ---
    Answer me! After what you did yesterday!
[12:52] ---
    W-W-Well, I don't think I'm
    actually in love with her...
[12:55] ---
    Then are you just playing?!
[12:57] ---
    Are you saying you were just toying with
    Isumi when you did that yesterday?!
[13:01] ---
    If anything, I play with
    Sakuya more than Isumi.
[13:06] ---
    Oh, but I would like to
    play more with Isumi, too.
[13:12] ---
    M-Miss?!
[13:14] ---
    J... J...
[13:15] ---
    Hayate, you jerk!
[13:20] ---
    That hurt...
[13:21] ---
    I shouldn't crack eggs using my head. Yeah.
[13:25] ---
    I misjudged you, Hayate!
[13:28] ---
    Are you all right?
[13:30] ---
    Um, did I do something?
[13:32] ---
    What? I-I wouldn't know...
[13:33] ---
    Could it be because Isumi confessed
    to me that she loved me?
[13:38] ---
    I-Isumi said that?
[13:40] ---
    Yes. It's so cute, isn't it?
[13:43] ---
    It might be that kids just love me,
[13:45] ---
    so maybe I'd make a good
    preschool teacher or something.
[13:48] ---
    What?
[13:49] ---
    Uh, perhaps...
[13:52] ---
    I must... do something about this...
[13:55] ---
    Video Rental
    V Tachibana
[13:57] ---
    DX Animation
    Tama's Sinister Design!!
[14:00] ---
    Honestly!
[14:02] ---
    Why do men want to watch such things?!
[14:05] ---
    You've been looking at it for some
    30 minutes yourself, though...
[14:10] ---
    The Young Sir is still a child, so
    I'm sure he has no interest in girls,
[14:14] ---
    but will he eventually want
    to watch things like this?
[14:17] ---
    No! I'm sure only a portion of men do this!
[14:20] ---
    Surely, the Young Sir will not...!
[14:23] ---
    Do Not Enter
[14:24] ---
    But he has not set foot
    outside since last night...
[14:27] ---
    What in the world could he be...
[14:35] ---
    I-I am sorry, we are not open yet...
[14:38] ---
    Miss Nagi!
[14:39] ---
    I'm coming in for a bit.
[14:43] ---
    No! Isumi couldn't possibly have
    feelings for the butler-in-debt...
[14:46] ---
    But then...
[14:49] ---
    How can you sleep there like
    you've got no problems?!
[14:51] ---
    N-Nagi, what the hell are you doing here?!
[14:54] ---
    What am I doing?! I've run away from home!
[14:56] ---
    Huh?!
[14:57] ---
    Heartbreak!
[14:58] ---
    And in despair, the girl ran away from home.
[15:01] ---
    Oh, you guys can go home now.
[15:04] ---
    But don't tell Maria about this.
[15:06] ---
    Yes, Miss!
SIGN    I'm running away from home!! Don't look for me!! Nagi!!
[15:08] ---
    Wh-What shall we do?
[15:10] ---
    Well, we'll have to look for her.
[15:12] ---
    Understood!
[15:13] ---
    Oh, uh, Hayate!
[15:14] ---
    I'll go to Isumi's place first!
[15:16] ---
    Oh, uh, wait!
[15:20] ---
    Uh, um, if Miss Nagi has run
    away from home, does that...
[15:22] ---
    She will be staying here for a while.
[15:25] ---
    By the way, Miss Saki Kijima.
[15:26] ---
    Yes?!
[15:28] ---
    Miss Nagi is the one and only
    granddaughter of the Sanzenin family
[15:31] ---
    and she is to be spending time here.
[15:33] ---
    If something should happen to her...
[15:38] ---
    You understand, I hope?
[15:40] ---
    You will not go unpunished.
[15:48] ---
    Anyway, we'll get nowhere if we
    just keep fighting like this.
[15:51] ---
    You're right.
[15:52] ---
    Let's go to Isumi's place...
[15:54] ---
    ...and ask her how she feels!
[16:00] ---
    Oh, my, Nagi has run away from home?
[16:03] ---
    Yes, do you have any ideas?
[16:06] ---
    Well, it is probably...
[16:11] ---
    What is the matter?!
[16:12] ---
    Oh, no, some dust got in my eyes...
[16:14] ---
    A-Are you all right?
[16:18] ---
    Hey, isn't it possible you were
    mistaken about what you saw?
[16:21] ---
    Well, it's true, them embracing would be...
[16:39] ---
    I can't get it out...
[16:41] ---
    Hayate!
[16:43] ---
    M-Miss, so this is where you were!
[16:46] ---
    You came to see Isumi the
    moment I disappeared?!
[16:49] ---
    What? Uh, yes, I did, but...
[16:57] ---
    Isumi can just take you for 150 million!
[17:02] ---
    What?! M-Miss!
[17:04] ---
    Why, Miss?!
[17:06] ---
    Shall I take him?
[17:08] ---
    What?!
[17:09] ---
    What?!
[17:10] ---
    Shall I take my dear Hayate for 150 million?
[17:15] ---
    Wha?!
[17:25] ---
    Miss!
[17:26] ---
    Miss Nagi!
[17:28] ---
    Thus, the romantic comedy has grown
[17:30] ---
    into a muddy, icky, quagmire
    of a love-hate drama.
[17:34] ---
    In the meantime, as for Maria...
[17:36] ---
    I have to do something about this, but...
[17:39] ---
    Wait, what? Huh? I've been left
    alone somewhere along the way!
[17:43] ---
    Video Rental
    V Tachibana
SIGN    Shoplifting is a crime
[17:48] ---
    I swear! What the heck is the big
    idea of renting such boring DVDs?!
[17:52] ---
    Huh?
[17:53] ---
    Besides, what's with these?
[17:54] ---
    They're all just hyped up pieces of garbage.
[17:56] ---
    Th-That's my decision to make...
[17:59] ---
    Shut up! Quiet!
[18:00] ---
    Now you listen to me carefully!
[18:02] ---
    Time is limited!
[18:03] ---
    There are countless masterpieces
    in this world that must be seen!
[18:07] ---
    You are decisively lacking in "Gundam"!
[18:08] ---
    Sieg Ze*n
[18:10] ---
    G-Gundam?
[18:12] ---
    That's right! "Gundam"!
[18:14] ---
    So, I'll loan you all of it from
    the original series to "00"!
[18:18] ---
    What?! All of it?!
[18:20] ---
    Just don't sleep, got it?!
[18:22] ---
    Don't sleep and watch it all,
    like your life depended on it!
[18:24] ---
    "Char's Counterattack" and
    "Turn A" are particularly...
[18:26] ---
    Like he even understands!
[18:28] ---
    Don't randomly loan out my DVDs!
[18:31] ---
    I am not doing it randomly! I've
    selected masterpieces to loan out!
[18:34] ---
    What the hell are you doing here anyway?!
[18:37] ---
    It's because I've run away
    from home, of course!
[18:39] ---
    The reason you didn't want
    to be at home to begin with
[18:42] ---
    was because that butler-in-debt
    was there, right?!
[18:44] ---
    Then, get your butt home already!
[18:46] ---
    Because that butler-in-debt's
    not at your house anymore!
[18:51] ---
    Not there...
[18:52] ---
    Hayate's...
[18:55] ---
    ...not there...
[18:58] ---
    YOUNG SIR!!!
[19:00] ---
    What are you doing bullying the Miss?!
[19:03] ---
    I-I wasn't really bullying her...
[19:05] ---
    At the rate you are going, Isumi
    will come to hate you, too!
[19:08] ---
    Doooom
[19:12] ---
    Wait...
[19:13] ---
    I'll just burn this damn store!
[19:15] ---
    Let it all burn!
[19:16] ---
    You cannot do this! Young Sir! Miss!
[19:17] ---
    Right around then, Saki was at the
    mercy of two heartbroken children.
[19:22] ---
    And now, next time, they
    will fight against a robot.
[19:31] ---
    Wataru and Tarutaru
[19:41] ---
    I'm a kitten. I don't have a name yet.
[19:44] ---
    The sky's so high up there again today...
[19:50] ---
    Look, look! So cute!
[19:51] ---
    Oh, wow, a kitten!
[19:52] ---
    It warms my heart!
[19:54] ---
    Hah, don't just let your heart be warmed.
[19:56] ---
    If you've got any compassion, feed me!
[19:59] ---
    Wait, you're really leaving?!
    Coldhearted bastards! Hypocrites!
[20:05] ---
    Darn, the rain in the city is cold.
[20:11] ---
    But man, I'm hungry.
[20:14] ---
    Wataru
[20:17] ---
    Hey, that's milk!
[20:23] ---
    Hey, you bastard!
[20:25] ---
    You weren't gonna give it to me, bro?
[20:31] ---
    Mouth-to-mouth feeding?!
[20:35] ---
    C-Come on, bro...
[20:43] ---
    H-Hey, you okay? You got a cold?
[20:49] ---
    Oh, my, Wataru, so this is where you were.
[20:52] ---
    Oh!
[20:54] ---
    So you found the kitty.
[20:55] ---
    I'm so glad for you.
[20:57] ---
    You've been worried and out looking for
    it every time it rained, after all.
[21:04] ---
    Bro, you've been looking for me?
[21:08] ---
    There, there. There, there. There, there.
[21:15] ---
    Bro, what's your name?
[21:18] ---
    Taru.
[21:20] ---
    Taru.
[21:21] ---
    Oh, so this kitty's name is Tarutaru.
[21:24] ---
    What?!
[21:25] ---
    What a cute name!
[21:32] ---
    I-It's kind of lame, but
    I'll just let it lie.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful, it'll
    be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Best of luck tuning. I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I'm Sakuya.
[23:35] ---
    But don't ya think I get too
    little screen time on this show?
[23:38] ---
    Some characters show up every
    week for no good reason.
[23:41] ---
    No, that's because you upstage
    the others when you show up...
[23:44] ---
    Butler-in-debt, ya aren't
    gonna gloss it over so easily.
[23:47] ---
    Saku's the character that gets forgotten.
[23:49] ---
    What was that?!
[23:50] ---
    Oh, well, whatever. Here's
    a risqué sexy shot of me.
[23:53] ---
    Well? Did ya sear that image into yer eyes?
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Someone like me deserves to
    get abandoned by the Miss.
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Being allowed to work in a
    grand mansion like that...
[24:03] ---
    It was like a dream to begin with.
[24:05] ---
    Hayate probably hates me now.
[24:08] ---
    Then why don't you just test his love?
[24:12] ---
    Test his love?
[24:13] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:15] ---
    "Hearts Wavering".
[24:16] ---
    Are you planning to fake a kidnapping?!
[24:18] ---
    You should not do that!
[24:19] ---
    Hearts Wavering
[24:20] ---
    The clouds of war call to Hayate.
[24:22] ---
    

25 - Hearts Wavering

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:14] ---
    My dear Hayate, are you all right?
[00:18] ---
    Of course, I am all right!
[00:20] ---
    C-Counting the stitches of the tatami
    mat is a piece of cake for me!
[00:25] ---
    My! That is so impressive
[00:25] ---
    One, two, three, four, five...
[00:27] ---
    He's pretty far gone.
[00:29] ---
    Yeah...
[00:30] ---
    123,600. 123,601. 123,602.
[00:35] ---
    My dear Hayate?
[00:36] ---
    What is it? I'm on the
    123,602nd stitch right now.
[00:41] ---
    123,603. 123,604.
[00:42] ---
    He's got it bad.
[00:43] ---
    Yeah, bad...
[00:45] ---
    123,605...
[00:49] ---
    Someone like me deserves to
    get abandoned by the Miss.
[00:53] ---
    Um...
[00:54] ---
    Being allowed to work in a
    grand mansion like that...
[00:57] ---
    It was like a dream to begin with.
[00:59] ---
    Um...
[01:00] ---
    I've just woken from the dream, that's
    all. Nothing to be sad about...
[01:02] ---
    Um, my dear Hayate?
[01:04] ---
    Shove!
[01:08] ---
    I-Isumi?!
[01:09] ---
    Oh, pardon me!
[01:12] ---
    You seem so down. That is...
[01:16] ---
    I was trying to cheer you up...
[01:19] ---
    Pardon me for doing something
    I am unaccustomed to.
[01:21] ---
    But I did not know what to do...
[01:28] ---
    N-No, you must not laugh!
[01:31] ---
    Oh, no. I feel better now, thanks to that!
[01:33] ---
    What?
[01:34] ---
    So I am fine now!
[01:36] ---
    That's right! I have no choice
    but to do my best here!
[01:39] ---
    So, I will work hard and count every
    last tatami stitch in this house!
[01:43] ---
    My! That is so impressive!
[01:43] ---
    1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9! 10!
[01:45] ---
    He really has lost it.
[01:46] ---
    11! 12! 13! 14!
[01:46] ---
    He might be beyond help at this point...
[01:49] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[01:52] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[01:56] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[01:59] ---
    who is there to support his mistress
    in all aspects of her life.
[02:02] ---
    Yes!
[02:03] ---
    This is about a boy who fights and puts
    his life on the line for a girl...
[02:08] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[02:11] ---
    Hi! Do you know who I am?! Yes! It's Gilbert!
[02:15] ---
    Now, another "Hayate the Combat
    Butler" is about to start!
[02:18] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[02:18] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[02:25] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[02:25] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[02:31] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[02:31] ---
    Giving in to fate
[02:34] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[02:34] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[02:39] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[02:39] ---
    That's just not cool!
[02:44] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[02:44] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[02:47] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[02:47] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[02:52] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[02:52] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[02:56] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[02:56] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[03:02] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[03:02] ---
    Just let it take you
[03:09] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[03:09] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[03:12] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[03:12] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[03:15] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[03:15] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[03:21] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[03:21] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[03:28] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[03:28] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[03:47] ---
    Hearts Wavering
[03:50] ---
    Video Rental
    V Tachibana
[03:53] ---
    Honestly!
[03:54] ---
    Selling Hayate to the Saginomiyas?
    What a child you are!
[03:58] ---
    It cannot be helped. Things
    just ended up that way!
[04:01] ---
    Do you plan to keep losing the important
    things in your life like that?
[04:06] ---
    Shut up! Why are you here anyway?!
[04:09] ---
    The members of the SP were
    kind enough to tell me.
[04:12] ---
    Aren't you guys supposed to be on my side?!
[04:14] ---
    O-Of course, we are on your side, Miss Nagi!
[04:18] ---
    Oh, is that right?
[04:20] ---
    I see.
[04:22] ---
    So you are on Nagi's side...
[04:25] ---
    Traitors!
[04:27] ---
    People will not follow your lead
    with just your blustering whims.
[04:31] ---
    Maria is so impressive!
[04:34] ---
    Commanding those big men so easily!
[04:36] ---
    She's not on the same level
    as some rinky-dink maid.
[04:38] ---
    Rinky-dink?! Who are you
    calling a rinky-dink maid?!
[04:39] ---
    I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
[04:42] ---
    But I just hope he isn't crying.
[04:45] ---
    What?
[04:46] ---
    I mean, if you sold him for 150 million,
[04:49] ---
    it's not much different than what
    his terrible parents did to him.
[04:54] ---
    Hayate certainly seems like a
    very sensitive person, so...
[04:59] ---
    He is a boy who puts a smile on his
    face and cries in his heart, after all.
[05:02] ---
    And if he's always being yelled at
    by an insensitive girl like Nagi,
[05:05] ---
    I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to cry.
[05:07] ---
    C-Could it be...
[05:09] ---
    that I've done something awful to Hayate?
[05:13] ---
    Needless to say, everyone thought,
    "You just realized that now?!"
[05:18] ---
    I... I...
[05:21] ---
    Nagi?
[05:27] ---
    Video Rental
    (V Tachibana)
[05:28] ---
    What're you crying for?!
[05:30] ---
    I'm not really crying!
[05:33] ---
    Hayate might hate me now.
[05:36] ---
    Y-You need not worry!
[05:38] ---
    The Young Sir will do
    something about it, Miss!
[05:40] ---
    Me?! I'm technically depressed
    about Isumi here, too!
[05:44] ---
    It will be fine!
[05:45] ---
    The power of your love will surely
    capture Isumi's attention!
[05:48] ---
    Oh, you think?
[05:50] ---
    But Wataru's not popular...
[05:52] ---
    Bastard! You picking a fight?!
[05:52] ---
    Miss Nagi!
[05:54] ---
    Fine, whatever. I'll do something
    about it, so wait here!
[05:57] ---
    What?! O-Oh, Young Sir?!
[06:05] ---
    But how are you going to bring him back?
[06:08] ---
    Oh, that will be easy.
[06:10] ---
    Hayate probably thinks
    that Nagi hates him now,
[06:14] ---
    so if I tell him that Nagi is in
    tears and wants him to come home...
[06:17] ---
    But Isumi...
[06:18] ---
    My instinct tells me that she does
    not love him so terribly much.
[06:22] ---
    Well, everything will be fine if
    you just leave it to those two.
[06:25] ---
    But Hayate probably hates me now...
[06:29] ---
    Then why don't you just test it?
[06:34] ---
    Uh, who?
[06:36] ---
    More like, test what?
[06:37] ---
    I mean, why don't you just test his love?
[06:40] ---
    Um, Miss, do you know this man?
[06:43] ---
    Yeah, I'm ashamed to say we're related.
[06:46] ---
    But we are not just related.
[06:48] ---
    I'm a candidate to be heir
    of the Sanzenin fortune
[06:50] ---
    and my name's Gilbert!
[06:52] ---
    Um, are you two really related?
[06:55] ---
    I would sever the tie if I could.
[06:57] ---
    So? What's this about testing his love?
[07:00] ---
    In other words, if there is love
    between you and that butler,
[07:03] ---
    he should be able to overcome any obstacle.
[07:05] ---
    For example, if we say
    that I've kidnapped you,
[07:08] ---
    he may or may not come for
    you faster than anyone else!
[07:12] ---
    Are you planning to fake a kidnapping?!
[07:14] ---
    You should not do that!
[07:15] ---
    Yeah, I'll decline.
[07:16] ---
    Why?!
[07:17] ---
    Hayate probably won't come!
[07:19] ---
    Actually, he might come, but I think
    that would be like out of sympathy...
[07:24] ---
    Is that so?
[07:25] ---
    What a cowardly brat you are.
[07:28] ---
    To think such a sissy with no
    stomach to face a challenge
[07:31] ---
    is the Sanzenin family heir!
[07:33] ---
    Our modern-day society has
    truly gone to the dogs!
[07:35] ---
    Fine!
[07:37] ---
    Fake a kidnapping or whatever you want to do!
[07:39] ---
    Miss!
[07:39] ---
    But I will be the one who wins!
[07:42] ---
    That's what I like to hear!
[07:45] ---
    Meanwhile, at the Saginomiya residence...
[07:48] ---
    Are you all right with leaving
    things as they are, Hayate?
[07:50] ---
    All right or not, there's nothing
    I can do about it anyway...
[07:54] ---
    That child says and does things
    on the spur of the moment.
[07:56] ---
    It would be endless if you
    took it all seriously.
[07:59] ---
    Yes, well, that's true, but...
[08:01] ---
    Talk about harsh...
[08:03] ---
    Besides, don't you want to come back, Hayate?
[08:06] ---
    Don't you feel any attachment towards
    Nagi and the Sanzenin estate?
[08:11] ---
    No... attachment... or memories...
[08:20] ---
    Wow! The Tokyo underground
    never fails to impress!
[08:24] ---
    But why come all this way to such a place?
[08:26] ---
    The obstacles must be large
    in order to measure love.
[08:30] ---
    Don't tell me you plan to fight Hayate again.
[08:32] ---
    Yes!
[08:34] ---
    No matter how strong that butler is,
[08:36] ---
    it will be impossible for
    him to win against this!
[08:38] ---
    Wh-What are you going to
    do if Hayate gets injured?!
[08:42] ---
    There is no need to worry.
[08:44] ---
    The scientist who built this is a genius.
[08:47] ---
    So the specs are fully human-friendly!
[08:53] ---
    Hey, Eight, what's this part for again?
[08:57] ---
    Oh, that's the control
    chip for the giant robot
[09:00] ---
    that you made yesterday
    at a friend's request.
[09:03] ---
    Huh... So I made a giant robot...
[09:07] ---
    What?!
[09:08] ---
    I was nodding off, so I don't remember much.
[09:11] ---
    B-But that's impressive!
[09:13] ---
    What?
[09:14] ---
    Because you made that incredible thing,
    even when you were nodding off.
[09:17] ---
    Really? Do you think so?
[09:19] ---
    But it's not that big a deal.
[09:21] ---
    I just put your Version 8.1 system
    in your prototype body. That's all.
[09:26] ---
    Th-That's the data from when
    I was the most reckless!
[09:30] ---
    Isn't that really dangerous?
[09:32] ---
    Oh, please, Eight!
[09:34] ---
    That's why I made the control chip!
[09:37] ---
    I-I see...
[09:44] ---
    Aw, man, I'm so bored.
[09:46] ---
    I wish something good would happen.
[09:50] ---
    Osaka Specialty Twirly Octopus Balls
[09:51] ---
    No way! They're freshly made!
[09:53] ---
    It's probably a present from God!
[10:04] ---
    Do you like sushi?!
    (Sushi suki ka?!)
[10:08] ---
    Please open up the country.
    (Kaikoku shite kudasai.)
[10:14] ---
    Will Hayate come for me?
[10:17] ---
    No, even if he does come,
    Hayate may no longer...
[10:20] ---
    Man, it's so comfortable
    here at Isumi's place!
[10:23] ---
    She's quiet and kind, unlike
    that spoiled little miss.
[10:26] ---
    Man, getting sold was the way to go!
[10:31] ---
    Hey, now, that's your own wild imagination.
[10:33] ---
    Th-That's right! It all began
    because Hayate cheated on me!
[10:37] ---
    Who cheated on ya?
[10:40] ---
    Sakuya! What are you doing here?!
[10:42] ---
    What am I doin'? I thought I'd
    watch over what my bro's doin'.
[10:46] ---
    What?! G-Gilbert is your big brother?!
[10:49] ---
    I didn't know until recently myself,
[10:51] ---
    but it's 'cause he's a love
    child born to another mother.
[10:53] ---
    But we look alike, don't we?
[10:55] ---
    And that makes you happy?
[10:57] ---
    But how'd things end up this way?
[11:00] ---
    That's because... Hayate cheated
    on me with Isumi and...
[11:04] ---
    Huh?!
[11:04] ---
    It wasn't just Isumi!
[11:06] ---
    Hayate said he plays with you often, too!
[11:09] ---
    Sure, we play often.
[11:10] ---
    Doin' slapstick comedy routines.
[11:13] ---
    Like I said, doin' slapstick comedy routines.
[11:17] ---
    Ah-ha! So, what, Little Nagi?
[11:20] ---
    Yer only 13 and ya thought "play"
    meant somethin' like that?
[11:24] ---
    No, you idiot! You're wrong!
[11:26] ---
    Of course, it's slapstick comedy
    routines! I didn't have the wrong idea!
[11:30] ---
    Don't ya worry. I know, I know.
[11:33] ---
    Precocious brat.
[11:37] ---
    But man, that's a terrible story.
[11:40] ---
    That butler-in-debt did nothin'
    wrong and ya sold him off.
[11:47] ---
    He'll never come.
[11:49] ---
    Hayate will never come to rescue me.
[11:53] ---
    Little missy, it's by overcoming
    such misunderstandings and conflicts
[11:56] ---
    that trust grows stronger between people!
[11:59] ---
    So you mustn't fear misunderstandings!
[12:01] ---
    "Love" is coming in spite of such things!
[12:06] ---
    What? The machine just...
[12:08] ---
    Bro!
[12:10] ---
    Kill.
[12:12] ---
    Kill.
[12:13] ---
    Kill the stinking brat with
    blonde pigtails and her butler.
[12:17] ---
    My life is in a shambles
    because of those two!
[12:20] ---
    So it's saying. What shall we do?
[12:22] ---
    What to do? I'm not going to sit
    around listening to a loser gripe.
[12:26] ---
    Yeah, why don't we just leave it and run?
[12:29] ---
    We'll just say my bro is deadmeat
    in there and that should do it.
[12:33] ---
    Please don't abandon me, my sister!
[12:35] ---
    Besides, this thing is out
    to get the little miss Nagi!
[12:38] ---
    I don't think you'll be able
    to run from it so easily!
[12:41] ---
    That's right! I'm not forgiving
    that girl with the blonde pigtails!
[12:47] ---
    Huh? Where did she go?
[12:48] ---
    Where did that little girl go?
[12:49] ---
    Ya really should pay good money for CPUs.
[12:52] ---
    But I am glad that it seems like this
    situation will not get out of control.
[12:56] ---
    The Young Sir may be worried,
    so I will give him a call.
[12:59] ---
    Good idea.
[13:02] ---
    What's up, Saki? What is it?
[13:04] ---
    Don't tell me Nagi's been
    kidnapped or something.
[13:06] ---
    What? No, um, it is not a kidnapping, but...
[13:09] ---
    Damn you, Nagi Sanzenin!
    I'll friggin' roll you!
[13:12] ---
    H-Hey, don't tell me we're talking murder!
[13:14] ---
    N-No, that is not it!
[13:16] ---
    It's not just a kidnapping, but
    it's about to become a murder?!
[13:19] ---
    It is all right. She has yet to be killed.
[13:22] ---
    Then, Nagi's on the verge of being killed?!
[13:24] ---
    What?!
[13:26] ---
    Oh! Hey, Saki! Saki!
[13:30] ---
    Um, Wataru, the phone
    call you just received...
[13:33] ---
    I-I don't really get it,
[13:35] ---
    but Saki's screwed up and Nagi's been
    kidnapped and about to get killed...
[13:38] ---
    What?!
[13:39] ---
    I-It can't be... Nagi...
[13:41] ---
    Hayate!
[13:43] ---
    Uh, what? Hayate?
[13:45] ---
    Aw... No helpin' it, I guess.
[13:48] ---
    I'll call 'em back.
[13:50] ---
    'Cause I bet they totally got the wrong idea.
[13:53] ---
    Oh, I know!
[13:53] ---
    Oh, hello? Is this Wataru?
[13:54] ---
    If I take out all of them,
[13:55] ---
    This is Sakuya. So, anyway...
[13:56] ---
    one of them would be the little girl!
[13:58] ---
    We're in a real bad
    situation, so come save us.
[13:59] ---
    What?!
[14:02] ---
    Hey!
[14:03] ---
    This is bad. They really are in big trouble!
[14:05] ---
    What?!
[14:06] ---
    It will be all right.
[14:10] ---
    Because my dear Hayate has gone to save Nagi.
[14:15] ---
    Misses!
[14:17] ---
    That thing's comin' after us!
[14:19] ---
    What?!
[14:20] ---
    How dare you go after
    our precious Miss Nagi?!
[14:23] ---
    Even another Sanzenin family member
    will not be forgiven for that!
[14:26] ---
    Shut up!
[14:26] ---
    If you don't want to get hurt, hurry
    up and hand over that pigtail girl!
[14:32] ---
    We can't have you underestimating
    the power of the Sanzenin family SP!
[14:36] ---
    What?!
[14:38] ---
    Behold! You damn piece of
    Andro Army scrap metal!
[14:42] ---
    This is what the Sanzenin
    family SP is made of!
[14:46] ---
    Found you, pigtails!
[14:49] ---
    Now, that solves everything.
[14:52] ---
    Like hell it does!
[14:53] ---
    That is right! This is too much!
[14:57] ---
    I've got you cornered, little girl!
[14:59] ---
    No, no, no!
[15:00] ---
    What are you going to do now
    that you have me cornered?!
[15:03] ---
    What?
[15:03] ---
    What am I going to do?
[15:10] ---
    Blush.
[15:11] ---
    Then, I think it's time for...
[15:12] ---
    What was that "blush" about?!
[15:14] ---
    And the way your hands are
    moving is extremely lewd!
[15:17] ---
    Shut up, little girl!
[15:18] ---
    Dodge, you idiot!
[15:23] ---
    Young Sir!
[15:23] ---
    Sheesh! Quit giving me so much trouble!
[15:26] ---
    What are you doing here, Young Sir?
[15:27] ---
    Oh, this place is right under Isumi's house.
[15:33] ---
    Wh-What?
[15:34] ---
    Young Sir!
[15:35] ---
    You dummy!
[15:36] ---
    I've always thought of him as a child,
[15:39] ---
    but somewhere along the way,
    he's become all grown up!
[15:42] ---
    DX Animation
    Tama's Sinister Design!!
[15:43] ---
    All grown up...
[15:47] ---
    And will he be watching videos like that?
[15:49] ---
    You must not!
[15:50] ---
    Huh?!
[15:50] ---
    It is still too early for
    you to watch pervy videos!
[15:53] ---
    Wha?! I-I don't watch stuff like that!
[15:55] ---
    Hey, you people! You need
    to hurry up and run!
[15:57] ---
    You won't get away from me this time!
[15:59] ---
    That's enough, you junkyard robot!
[16:02] ---
    Didn't you hear me, you piece of junk?!
[16:05] ---
    You defective crab bastard!
[16:06] ---
    Wh-Why you!
[16:08] ---
    I swear! Your design is even
    worse than fake Gundam models!
[16:11] ---
    How dare you make trouble for us?!
[16:12] ---
    That's why you're not popular!
[16:14] ---
    Crushed!
[16:17] ---
    I, Nagi Sanzenin, will be your opponent!
[16:21] ---
    Then let's see you do just that!
[16:24] ---
    Watch out, Miss!
[16:26] ---
    Where's Hayate?!
[16:27] ---
    He should've headed over here before me!
[16:31] ---
    Oh, I see.
[16:34] ---
    So Hayate really isn't coming for me...
[16:38] ---
    Miss Nagi!
[16:39] ---
    He probably won't come for me.
[16:42] ---
    He probably hates me.
[16:43] ---
    Run, Nagi!
[16:45] ---
    Die!
[16:48] ---
    Hayate...
[16:53] ---
    HAYATE!
[17:09] ---
    You called, Miss?
[17:14] ---
    Hayate, why are you...
[17:17] ---
    Why? Because you called my name.
[17:24] ---
    The bitterness you carved into me...
[17:27] ---
    You better not tell me you've forgotten!
[17:28] ---
    Are you hurt or injured anywhere, Miss?
[17:30] ---
    I'll tear you and the little girl apart!
[17:31] ---
    No, I'm perfectly fine.
[17:32] ---
    Wait... Hey, you! Don't ignore me!
[17:32] ---
    I see. I'm glad to hear that!
[17:35] ---
    No need to be impatient.
[17:36] ---
    I fully intend to hold you responsible
    for putting Miss in danger!
[17:40] ---
    What?!
[17:41] ---
    Could it be that he's mad?
[17:43] ---
    More like, when a guy who usually
    doesn't get mad gets mad...
[17:47] ---
    It's scary!
[17:49] ---
    Hey, boy, please don't forget about me!
[17:53] ---
    I, Gilbert, am on board this mecha!
[17:56] ---
    I see, so you're the culprit behind
    the Miss's attempted kidnapping.
[18:02] ---
    Th-That's not quite right...
[18:04] ---
    You see, I conspired with the
    Miss and the others to...
[18:07] ---
    Conspired with them, you say?!
[18:08] ---
    Then are you claiming
    that Saki and the others
[18:11] ---
    came up with the idiotic idea
    of faking a kidnapping?!
[18:14] ---
    How about it, Saki?
[18:15] ---
    That's not true! My bro Gilbert
    kidnapped her for her fortune!
[18:19] ---
    See?! I knew it!
[18:20] ---
    My sister!
[18:22] ---
    So, in the end, all you can trust is money!
[18:26] ---
    In that case, I will meet
    the condition that was set
[18:28] ---
    and make the Sanzenin family fortune mine!
[18:30] ---
    Or rather... Destroy everyone!
[18:35] ---
    I will not let you!
[18:38] ---
    I will not allow the Miss to
    be endangered any further!
[18:41] ---
    Hayate?!
[18:42] ---
    Tell this to the other
    potential heirs as well!
[18:44] ---
    If you want the Sanzenin fortune,
[18:46] ---
    first, defeat their butler, Hayate Ayasaki!
[18:49] ---
    Y-You idiot! Do you have any
    idea how dangerous that is?!
[18:54] ---
    I do know!
[18:55] ---
    Besides, there's no way that old
    geezer Mikado will accept that...
[18:59] ---
    She might come to hate ya over
    some other misunderstandin'
[19:02] ---
    and kick ya out again!
[19:04] ---
    It doesn't really matter.
[19:06] ---
    Even if the Miss comes to hate me...
[19:10] ---
    It won't change the fact
    that I care about the Miss.
[19:19] ---
    Quit the romantic comedy thing!
[19:21] ---
    No matter how cool you act,
[19:22] ---
    you cannot win against this
    robot, Hayate Ayasaki!
[19:25] ---
    You will be the one to fall victim to me!
[19:29] ---
    Hayate, watch out!
[19:30] ---
    There's no need to worry!
[19:33] ---
    I prepared all kinds of things in
    anticipation of just such a situation!
[19:36] ---
    What?!
[19:41] ---
    Wait, that's against the Firearms
    and Swords Control Law!
[19:45] ---
    Not to worry.
[19:46] ---
    I'm thoroughly familiar with
    how to operate this thing.
[19:48] ---
    From where?!
[19:50] ---
    Besides, this Firearms and
    Swords Control Law thing...
[19:51] ---
    When it comes to protecting the Miss,
[19:53] ---
    I really couldn't care
    less about such things.
[19:58] ---
    Do you still want to continue this?
[20:03] ---
    You can defeat me, but a second
    and a third Gilbert will surely...
[20:07] ---
    What demon king do you think you are?!
[20:08] ---
    Sorry! Sorry! I surrender! I surrender!
[20:15] ---
    The furious gunfight came to an end...
[20:18] ---
    Hayate...
[20:20] ---
    What is it, Miss?
[20:21] ---
    And the girl and the butler
    gazed at one another...
[20:24] ---
    No... That is...
[20:27] ---
    "I'm sorry I fired you on
    the spur of the moment!
[20:30] ---
    "I apologize, so come back
    with me to the mansion,"
[20:33] ---
    is what Nagi wants to say, but...
[20:39] ---
    Come to think of it,
[20:40] ---
    I changed the condition for the
    inheritance on the spur of the moment,
[20:43] ---
    so it may actually be more
    dangerous for me to be near you.
[20:49] ---
    Oh, but never mind that.
[20:51] ---
    I'm Isumi's butler now, aren't I?
[20:53] ---
    B-But that's...!
[20:56] ---
    But I abandoned my duties when I came here,
[20:59] ---
    so I may have been fired by now.
[21:02] ---
    In that case, I will be out on the
    streets again with my 150 million debt.
[21:08] ---
    I wish there was a cute girl somewhere,
    who would find me a new job.
[21:15] ---
    Th-Then...
[21:23] ---
    Why don't you be my butler?
[21:28] ---
    I will, Miss!
[21:32] ---
    Are you all right with this, Isumi?
[21:35] ---
    It is not good to buy or
    sell a person for money.
[21:39] ---
    Besides...
[21:41] ---
    Besides?
[21:42] ---
    Those two are very
    well-suited to one another.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful, it'll
    be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    I have a good idea! I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:35] ---
    I'm Sakuya Aizawa.
[23:36] ---
    Well, Miss Aizawa, this
    is an awfully sober song.
[23:39] ---
    The cry of my soul's in this song, after all.
[23:42] ---
    It's the pensive song of a woman
    who lives for duty and compassion.
[23:44] ---
    It just sounds old fogy to me.
[23:47] ---
    Nagi, yer still a kid, so ya can't
    understand how good this song is yet.
[23:50] ---
    I don't care if I never do!
[23:52] ---
    Next time, we'll have a special
    edition. Please look forward to it!
[23:55] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    Hey, Hayate, what is the meaning of this?!
SIGN    The next episode of "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Enough of this weird joke!
[24:02] ---
    What? Um...
[24:02] ---
    I-I won't let you have Hayate!
[24:04] ---
    Because he's...
[24:05] ---
    Because he's my precious butler!
[24:09] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:11] ---
    "The Delivery Was Made in 29 Minutes,
    So Please Pay the Stipulated Fee...
[24:15] ---
    "Is a Thing of the Distant Past".
[24:17] ---
    Hayate has amnesia?!
[24:19] ---
    That's impossible!
[24:19] ---
    The Delivery Was Made in 29 Minutes,
     So Please Pay the Stipulated Fee...
     Is a Thing of the Distant Past
[24:20] ---
    Next time, you'll be
    thrilled by Hayate in drag!
[24:23] ---
    

26 - The Delivery Was Made in 29 Minutes, So Please Pay the Stipulated Fee...Is a Thing of the Distance Past

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:11] ---
    I won't let you have Hayate!
[00:15] ---
    Because he's...
[00:17] ---
    Because he's my precious butler!
[00:23] ---
    A butler is one who serves.
[00:26] ---
    A butler is one who waits upon others.
[00:29] ---
    A butler is a formal guardian,
[00:32] ---
    who is there to support his
    mistress in all aspects of her life.
[00:36] ---
    Yes!
[00:37] ---
    This is about a boy who fights
    and puts his life on the line for a girl...
[00:41] ---
    A super combat battle story!
[00:45] ---
    Won't you be my butler?
[00:47] ---
    With pleasure, Miss.
[00:49] ---
    Who the?
[00:52] ---
    Daichi ni kaketa bokura no yukue
[00:52] ---
    Our destination that we've
    staked upon this earth
[00:59] ---
    Tsuki-nukeru hayate no gotoku
[00:59] ---
    Like the sudden gale that cuts across
[01:05] ---
    Unmei ni makete
[01:05] ---
    Giving in to fate
[01:08] ---
    Shagami-komu nante tsumannai yo
[01:08] ---
    And hunkering down is no fun
[01:13] ---
    Sore ja kakko warui yo!
[01:13] ---
    That's just not cool!
[01:18] ---
    Uso kara deta makoto
[01:18] ---
    Many a true word is spoken in jest
[01:21] ---
    Koukai wa kitto mi kara deta sabi
[01:21] ---
    Regret is probably reaping what you sowed
[01:26] ---
    Zettai, nase ba naru!
[01:26] ---
    Where there's a will,
    there's definitely a way!
[01:30] ---
    Ooki na hamon ni nomi-komareteku
[01:30] ---
    As a great rippling wave swallows us up
[01:36] ---
    Karada nami ni makasereba
[01:36] ---
    Just let it take you
[01:43] ---
    Kanchigai no yume
[01:43] ---
    Dreams that are misguided
[01:46] ---
    Mato-hazure no kitai
[01:46] ---
    Hopes that are way off base
[01:49] ---
    Tsuyoku omoeba itsuka tsukameru sa!
[01:49] ---
    You'll grab them someday,
    if you just have conviction
[01:55] ---
    Daichi keri-age hashiri-dasou
[01:55] ---
    Let's kick up the earth and start running
[02:02] ---
    Kimama ni mau kaze no gotoku
[02:02] ---
    Like the capricious breeze that dances about
[02:21] ---
    The Delivery Was Made in 29 Minutes,
    So Please Pay the Stipulated Fee... Is a Thing of the Distant Past
[02:24] ---
    The story goes back to this morning.
[02:27] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki returns!
[02:29] ---
    Waking up make-up!
[02:34] ---
    Not!
[02:38] ---
    Yes, this is how it should be.
[02:40] ---
    Hayate was taken in at
    Isumi's place in the last episode,
[02:43] ---
    but he has returned
    to the Sanzenin household again.
[02:46] ---
    I have to continue to serve the Miss
    with everything I have.
[02:51] ---
    Oh?
[02:52] ---
    Looks like she's calling for me already.
[02:57] ---
    Um... Miss?
[02:59] ---
    Say, Hayate...
[03:00] ---
    Yes?
[03:01] ---
    I have a quick question.
    Have you ever had amnesia?
[03:04] ---
    What? Amnesia?
[03:07] ---
    No, I've never really experienced it...
[03:10] ---
    The truth is,
[03:11] ---
    she's apparently planning to enter
    a new manga author contest again.
[03:14] ---
    Indeed, this time, I intend
    to attempt an amnesia story,
[03:17] ---
    which is one of the more
    cliché manga plot devices.
[03:20] ---
    Yes! For example, she runs
    out of the house due to shock
[03:22] ---
    that the sheep she loved got sold,
    and she gets run over by a carriage.
[03:24] ---
    Or maybe cryogenic freeze or something.
[03:27] ---
    It's true, this plot device has been used
    a disgusting number of times before!
[03:30] ---
    But to that, I boldly say...
[03:32] ---
    That's exactly why it's worth doing!
[03:34] ---
    I see...
[03:36] ---
    So, she seems to be thinking
[03:38] ---
    of a revolutionary story
    that incorporates amnesia, but...
[03:42] ---
    I just can't think
    of anything that stands out.
[03:45] ---
    Um, shall I go to Wataru's store
[03:48] ---
    and rent a couple videos
    that deal with amnesia?
[03:52] ---
    Oh, r-right... No, it's true...
[03:54] ---
    Please ask whatever you like of me.
[03:56] ---
    I am your loyal butler, after all!
[03:59] ---
    Hayate!
[04:01] ---
    Then I shall be going!
[04:05] ---
    Maria, Hayate really is the most
    dependable in the universe, isn't he?
[04:09] ---
    Yes, I suppose...
[04:11] ---
    I just hope he doesn't run
    into more dangerous situations...
[04:21] ---
    Due to statements he made
    in the previous episode,
[04:24] ---
    people are now out to kill Hayate.
[04:26] ---
    Tell this to the other
    potential heirs as well!
[04:29] ---
    If you want the Sanzenin fortune,
[04:31] ---
    first, defeat their butler, Hayate Ayasaki!
[04:34] ---
    Hey, Hayate Ayasaki! You sure
    did a number on me last time!
[04:38] ---
    That voice! Gilbert?!
[04:40] ---
    I will still be taking
    the Sanzenin fortune in the end!
[04:45] ---
    Good grief.
[04:46] ---
    You really don't learn, do you?!
[04:49] ---
    To think you would get into
    that mobile coffin of your own will!
[04:52] ---
    Wh-Why you...!
SIGN    Today's Love Fortune Today's Lucky Item: Pizza
[04:56] ---
    Let's see... Today's lucky item is pizza.
SIGN    Today's Lucky Point: Park
[05:00] ---
    Lucky point is the park.
[05:02] ---
    "There might be a wonderful encounter
    with your prince on a white horse
SIGN    There might be a wonderful encounter with your prince on a white horse waiting for you. Good luck!
[05:05] ---
    "waiting for you."
[05:07] ---
    Could it be...?
[05:08] ---
    Maybe I'll get to see Hayate!
[05:11] ---
    I guess there's no way such
    wishful thinking will come true...
[05:20] ---
    H-Hayate?! No way!
[05:22] ---
    What? Miss Nishizawa?
[05:24] ---
    You! Get off me!
[05:29] ---
    H-Hayate?
[05:31] ---
    It's really you, right?
[05:33] ---
    B-But what are you doing?
[05:35] ---
    Why are you fighting that thing?
[05:37] ---
    W-Well, that is...
[05:38] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki!
[05:40] ---
    Prepare to meet your end!
[05:44] ---
    We can talk later!
[05:45] ---
    Let's get away from here first!
[05:48] ---
    O-Okay...
[05:54] ---
    This idea is no good!
[05:56] ---
    Never mind winning a fax machine.
[05:57] ---
    I couldn't even hope
    for the small screen-tone set
[05:58] ---
    or the 50 pages of special manuscript paper!
[06:01] ---
    Nagi, you have a phone call from Sakuya...
[06:04] ---
    I'm out of service range. Bye!
[06:05] ---
    Wait, hold on!
[06:06] ---
    Say, is my stupid bro over there?
[06:10] ---
    Your stupid bro?
[06:11] ---
    You mean Gilbert?
[06:12] ---
    That moron's rented some
    outrageous ordnance usin' my name.
[06:17] ---
    O-Ordnance?!
[06:18] ---
    Yup, yup, yup.
[06:20] ---
    Ya know, ma'am, business's been bad
    as ever. It's been a real ordnance.
[06:24] ---
    That's "a real ordeal", ya moron!
[06:26] ---
    Well, anyway, that aside...
[06:28] ---
    He's probably plannin' to go
    after the butler-in-debt again.
[06:30] ---
    If he comes to make trouble,
    gently rake him over the coals for me.
[06:34] ---
    Nagi?
[06:35] ---
    Knowing Hayate, I doubt there's
    any need to worry, but...
[06:39] ---
    Call the SP!
[06:41] ---
    We're going to look for Hayate.
[06:47] ---
    Found it!
[06:49] ---
    Miss Nishizawa, would you mind
    if I set you down for a bit?
[06:51] ---
    S-Sure.
[06:53] ---
    As I recall, Maria gave this to me
    for just such a situation...
[07:17] ---
    What is it?
[07:19] ---
    I see, so this is how it works...
[07:22] ---
    Thank you, Maria. This will be a big help.
[07:25] ---
    Hayate, it's coming!
[07:28] ---
    I feel sick.
[07:29] ---
    This mecha's giving me
    serious 3D motion sickness.
[07:32] ---
    Set! Arm!
[07:35] ---
    Hayate!
[07:43] ---
    What is this?!
[07:54] ---
    Hayate!
[07:56] ---
    Hayate!
[07:57] ---
    J-Just you remember this!
[08:02] ---
    Hayate, hang in there! Hayate!
[08:07] ---
    A dozen or so millennia later,
    having lost his memory,
[08:12] ---
    Hayate was drifting alone
    and solitary through space...
[08:17] ---
    No... Nono-riri-hei...
[08:21] ---
    Welcome back!
[08:29] ---
    S-So it was a dream...
[08:30] ---
    That's right! I have to hurry and take
    back ideas on amnesia to the Miss!
[08:36] ---
    Wait... Where am I...?
[08:38] ---
    H-Hayate, I'll call an ambulance right away!
[08:42] ---
    Don't die, okay?!
[08:42] ---
    Uh, um...
[08:44] ---
    Thank goodness!
[08:45] ---
    Are you okay? Does your head hurt at all?
[08:48] ---
    N-No, well...
[08:49] ---
    More importantly, this is...
[08:52] ---
    Putting your head on my lap was...! I...!
[08:54] ---
    Ow!
[08:57] ---
    Ow, that hurt...
[08:58] ---
    I-It's been a while since we've had
    some time to ourselves, hasn't it?
[09:02] ---
    R-Right...
[09:03] ---
    Hey, I've been wanting
    to ask you this for a while now.
[09:06] ---
    You evaded me that time, but...
[09:09] ---
    The truth is...
[09:11] ---
    ...I'm only interested
    in 2-dimensional things.
SIGN    Crushed!!
[09:15] ---
    Be honest with me...
[09:16] ---
    H-Hayate, how do you...
    really feel about me?
[09:23] ---
    Tell me.
[09:24] ---
    No, well...
[09:25] ---
    Tell me, tell me!
[09:28] ---
    My head!
[09:30] ---
    Hayate?
[09:33] ---
    Where am I? Who in the world am I?
[09:37] ---
    Sh-Shoot! I let my impulse get
    the better of me and I did it again!
[09:41] ---
    A desperate ploy like this...
    There's no way...
[09:43] ---
    A-Amnesia?
[09:45] ---
    Hayate got amnesia!
[09:49] ---
    What?! You're really going to believe it?!
[09:51] ---
    What'll I do?! I've never seen
    a real case of amnesia!
[09:56] ---
    Oh, "Winter Sonata!" Maybe
    I should've watched "Winter Sonata"!
[09:59] ---
    Bae! Maybe I should've watched Bae!
[10:02] ---
    Sorry for taking so long!
[10:03] ---
    What?
[10:06] ---
    Thank you for your business!
[10:07] ---
    Huh?
[10:08] ---
    Oh! I was hungry, so I ordered it!
    I'd totally forgotten!
[10:12] ---
    Oh? Um, could it be that... you're a butler?
[10:15] ---
    What?
[10:16] ---
    Right? You're a butler, right?
[10:18] ---
    Wow, I've never met a real one!
[10:21] ---
    Which means, this is your mistress, right?
[10:23] ---
    What?
[10:24] ---
    So, should I ask the butler to pay for this?
[10:28] ---
    What?
[10:30] ---
    Um, the bill?
[10:34] ---
    B-Butler Hayate.
[10:35] ---
    Huh?
[10:36] ---
    Wh-What are you doing all spaced out?
    Hurry up and pay this man.
[10:45] ---
    Y-Yes, as you wish, Miss.
[10:49] ---
    All right! That's it!
    I've always wanted to see that!
[10:53] ---
    Here is your tea, Miss.
[10:55] ---
    What? Oh...
[10:57] ---
    Thank you.
[11:02] ---
    S-So I'm your butler, then...
[11:05] ---
    Th-That's right, Hayate Ayasaki. You're...
[11:09] ---
    You're the butler of Ayumu Nishizawa.
[11:15] ---
    Now I've done it...
[11:17] ---
    Oh, man! I can't find
    the right time to call this off!
[11:21] ---
    Oh, man! And it looks like
    Hayate totally believes it, too...
[11:25] ---
    Well, no helping it!
    I guess what will be, will be!
[11:31] ---
    Mm, yum!
[11:33] ---
    Oh, could it be that the two
    halves have different toppings?
[11:36] ---
    That's right. This is called
    "half-and-half".
[11:40] ---
    Here, Butler Hayate, don't be shy.
    Why don't you try this side, too?
[11:44] ---
    Yes, then I will.
[11:47] ---
    What the? Th-This is delicious.
[11:49] ---
    I feel like this is a flavor
    I've never tasted before.
[11:52] ---
    What? Those are just plain anchovies.
[11:55] ---
    Hayate, you've never had anchovies?
[11:57] ---
    What? W-Well...
[11:59] ---
    I saw them when
    I was working part-time, but...
[12:02] ---
    It's delicious, Miss Ayumu.
[12:06] ---
    Could it be that this is a brief moment
    that God has give me as present?
[12:12] ---
    H-Hayate!
[12:15] ---
    And... It can't be!
[12:18] ---
    You're that thieving hamster!
[12:20] ---
    Miss?!
[12:23] ---
    Hey, Hayate, what is the meaning of this?!
[12:25] ---
    Enough of this weird joke!
[12:27] ---
    What? Um...
[12:28] ---
    I-I won't let you have Hayate!
[12:32] ---
    Because he's...
[12:33] ---
    Because he's my precious butler!
[12:38] ---
    Wh-What?!
[12:39] ---
    This is bad!
[12:40] ---
    At this point, I have to put an end
    to this, even if it's a bit forced!
[12:44] ---
    Hayate?!
[12:45] ---
    My head is somehow...
[12:46] ---
    Hayate!
[12:49] ---
    All right! Now's my chance!
[12:55] ---
    Wait... What?!
[12:56] ---
    Hayate!
[12:58] ---
    Hayate has amnesia?! That's impossible!
[13:04] ---
    Just you wait, Hayate!
[13:05] ---
    I'll restore your memories, without fail!
[13:09] ---
    I-I missed my opportunity yet again...
[13:12] ---
    Um, how long should I pretend to be asleep?
[13:18] ---
    Indian curry... (Indo karee wa...)
[13:20] ---
    ...is spicy. (...karee zo.)
[13:22] ---
    Elephants are elephantine, you know!
    Weak! (Zou wa okkiin dazo! Sabu!)
[13:26] ---
    Ready?
[13:27] ---
    We will now begin the Hayate Ayasaki
    Memory Instrumentality Project.
[13:32] ---
    I just happened to be
    examining amnesia today.
[13:36] ---
    I've prepared various kinds of missions,
[13:38] ---
    so I'd like everyone to lend a hand as well.
[13:40] ---
    I-I'd be lying if I said that I didn't
    feel like I might be in danger...
[13:44] ---
    But the Miss was so committed
    to her idea for the manga.
[13:48] ---
    If this will serve to hint
    at some ideas for her...
[13:51] ---
    All right!
[13:54] ---
    Huh? Where am I? What was I...
[13:56] ---
    Ah! Hayate, you're awake!
[13:58] ---
    A-Are you all right?
[14:00] ---
    Y-Yes...
[14:01] ---
    Hayate!
[14:02] ---
    Yes?
[14:03] ---
    Right now, due to amnesia,
[14:05] ---
    I hear you apparently believe
    you're this hamster's butler?!
[14:08] ---
    What? Uh, yes, that's right.
[14:10] ---
    I am Miss Ayumu's...
[14:12] ---
    Wrong!
[14:13] ---
    Hayate, you are my butler!
    Nagi Sanzenin's butler!
[14:16] ---
    Precisely!
[14:17] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, you are truly deplorable.
[14:21] ---
    I shall restore this man's memories,
    even if I have to use force!
[14:27] ---
    Klaus, are you saying you don't think
    I can restore Hayate's memories?
[14:31] ---
    With all due respect,
    that is exactly what I mean.
[14:33] ---
    Oh-ho!
[14:34] ---
    Interesting! I accept your challenge!
[14:36] ---
    Let us compete to see which one of us
    can restore Hayate's memories!
[14:41] ---
    Well, I'll be the winner anyway.
[14:44] ---
    Um... compete?
[14:47] ---
    How about it, Hayate? Do you remember now?
[14:50] ---
    These are your super
    favorite clothes, you know.
[14:53] ---
    M-My favorite?
[14:55] ---
    This sweetness...
[14:57] ---
    I feel like I may have seen her
    in Episode 8 or maybe not...
[15:00] ---
    I'm so shocked! I-I had no idea Hayate
    was into that sort of thing!
[15:03] ---
    Thus, the operation
    to restore his memories began!
[15:08] ---
    Rarr!
[15:09] ---
    What's wrong?! Defeat him swiftly
    with just one strike!
[15:13] ---
    But I can't just quietly
    let him eat me, either...
[15:17] ---
    All right! I'll use this
    as the trigger and...
[15:20] ---
    That's enough!
[15:24] ---
    Oh-ho...
[15:31] ---
    I'm so shocked! I had no idea Hayate
    had such tiger-killing abilities!
[15:35] ---
    All right!
[15:36] ---
    My memories are com--
[15:37] ---
    They don't seem to have been restored!
    The technique is wrong!
[15:39] ---
    Hm, it seems we will have to
    wait for the results.
[15:41] ---
    Oh, come on...
[15:42] ---
    Miss Nagi and Klaus fought.
[15:45] ---
    To restore Hayate's memories,
    they fought doggedly!
[15:49] ---
    Darn it! So his memories still
    aren't coming back!
[15:51] ---
    Since it's come to this,
    we'll use shock therapy!
[15:56] ---
    Wait! P-Please don't!
[15:58] ---
    Don't!
[15:59] ---
    Go on!
[16:03] ---
    Oh, the parachute...
[16:05] ---
    Mr. Klaus!
[16:18] ---
    That yell just now... Could Hayate
    have regained his memories already?!
[16:21] ---
    Or actually, maybe he never
    had amnesia to begin with?
[16:25] ---
    What prodigious deductive powers!
[16:28] ---
    No, not yet!
[16:29] ---
    There's no way Hayate's
    memories will be restored
[16:30] ---
    by methods thought up by someone like Klaus!
[16:32] ---
    I-Is that so?
[16:39] ---
    But Hayate's taking a long time
    to come to the surface.
[16:42] ---
    Maria, move forward slowly!
[16:43] ---
    We'll begin a search, just in case!
[16:45] ---
    I-Isn't this going too far,
    no matter how you look at it?
[16:48] ---
    Um...
[16:49] ---
    Please forgive her.
[16:51] ---
    She's trying her hardest
    for Hayate's sake, too.
[16:54] ---
    In her own way.
[16:58] ---
    Hey, Hayate, are you all right?!
[17:00] ---
    If you are, answer me! Come on!
[17:03] ---
    I feel a little defeated somehow...
[17:06] ---
    I guess a lot's happened
    that I don't know about.
[17:10] ---
    Between Hayate and that girl...
[17:20] ---
    What's that?
[17:21] ---
    Was there an island like that when
    we came fishing the other day?
[17:24] ---
    I-I don't know...
[17:25] ---
    Let's just go ashore and see.
[17:26] ---
    Maria, get the boat to shore for me!
[17:28] ---
    Oh, all right.
[17:33] ---
    Oh, I'm coming, too!
[17:41] ---
    Huh?! What the?!
[17:49] ---
    C-Could this also be because of the
    strange ecosystem of the Sanzenin Lake?!
[18:00] ---
    This is not good!
[18:04] ---
    What?! The engine's stalled
    at a time like this?!
[18:17] ---
    Those voices...
[18:19] ---
    The Miss and Miss Nishizawa?!
[18:27] ---
    Eep!
[18:29] ---
    Wh-What is this guy?!
[18:32] ---
    Could it be...?
[18:33] ---
    Are you the turtle god?
    The turtle god of the island?
[18:36] ---
    L-Let's run! Hurry!
[18:39] ---
    Th-The thing is,
    my legs gave out just now...
[18:50] ---
    Ow!
[18:52] ---
    If Hayate... If Hayate
    were here, he'd probably...
[18:56] ---
    H-Hey!
[18:58] ---
    Over there!
[19:09] ---
    H-Hey, stop!
[19:11] ---
    This girl is someone important to Hayate!
[19:13] ---
    I-If you lay a hand on her...
[19:15] ---
    ...I'll make you pay for it!
[19:17] ---
    Maybe?
[19:18] ---
    Miss Nishizawa...
[19:21] ---
    Hey, hamster, I appreciate the thought,
    but don't lose your nerve now!
[19:24] ---
    Stop, you reptile!
[19:26] ---
    Hayate!
[19:27] ---
    Hayate?
[19:28] ---
    You lay a hand on either of them
    and you will have to answer to me!
[19:55] ---
    Miss! And Miss Nishizawa!
[19:57] ---
    Are you... Are you hurt at all?
[19:59] ---
    Hayate...
[20:01] ---
    You...
[20:02] ---
    I apologize for putting
    the two of you in danger!
[20:05] ---
    I have... I have failed
    as a butler of the Sanzenin household!
[20:08] ---
    Hayate, you got your memories back!
[20:10] ---
    I'm so glad, Hayate!
[20:11] ---
    What? But I...
[20:13] ---
    Yes!
[20:15] ---
    If you're back to your old self,
    that's all that matters!
[20:18] ---
    Yes!
[20:22] ---
    R-Right! Thank you very much!
[20:24] ---
    All right!
[20:25] ---
    The Hayate Memory
    Instrumentality Project is over!
[20:31] ---
    Are you sure about not seeing her home?
[20:35] ---
    Well, as much as I hate to admit it,
    that little critter helped me,
[20:39] ---
    so I'll let those two
    have a little time alone...
[20:41] ---
    Owowowow...
[20:43] ---
    Well, I'm glad I got to see
    how your new life's going today.
[20:47] ---
    I apologize for all the trouble
    I put you through.
[20:50] ---
    Say, Hayate, do you remember
    what I asked you at the park?
[20:54] ---
    What?
[20:54] ---
    O-Oh, what was it about
    again? It's all kind of fuzzy...
[20:58] ---
    Figures.
[21:01] ---
    You care a great deal about
    that little miss, don't you, Hayate?
[21:04] ---
    What?
[21:05] ---
    But I also care a lot about...
[21:08] ---
    ...I care a lot about you, too!
[21:10] ---
    Miss Nishizawa...
[21:12] ---
    Hayate, next time...
[21:14] ---
    I mean, let's go to a pizza place sometime!
[21:16] ---
    What?
[21:17] ---
    You've never had anchovy
    pizza before, have you?
[21:20] ---
    But I'm sure you'll love it!
    I just have this feeling!
[21:23] ---
    I really think so for some reason!
[21:25] ---
    Just kidding!
[21:29] ---
    Well, let's meet again somewhere.
[21:32] ---
    Miss Nishizawa...
[21:34] ---
    Leaving Hayate with a bittersweet feeling,
[21:37] ---
    Miss Nishizawa left the Sanzenin residence.
[21:40] ---
    As for Klaus...
[21:42] ---
    A bit to the right...
[21:43] ---
    And so...
[21:45] ---
    ...he journeyed on into the far
    reaches of oblivion on autopilot.
[21:48] ---
    Starting next time, he'll be
    fighting a new turn of events.
[21:55] ---
    Naida kokoro no ho ni kaze ga fuki-nuketetta
[21:55] ---
    A breeze crossed the wilted sail of my heart
[22:00] ---
    Kimochi yureru soshite Lose My Way
[22:00] ---
    My feelings waver and then I lose my way
[22:05] ---
    Zutto kimi ga iru nara ii ka
[22:05] ---
    I guess if you'll always be here, it's okay
[22:08] ---
    Sore mo waruku wa nai So I Go Together
[22:08] ---
    That's not so bad, so I go together
[22:14] ---
    Tenki-yohou nante nai
[22:14] ---
    Weather forecasts don't exist
[22:16] ---
    Zenbu kibun-shidai
[22:16] ---
    It's all mood-dependent
[22:19] ---
    Nanimo shinpai nai
[22:19] ---
    There's nothing to worry about
[22:21] ---
    Makasete! Jiyuu-jizai
[22:21] ---
    Leave it to me! Perfectly free
[22:24] ---
    Keri-ageta kutsu ni
[22:24] ---
    On the shoe that I kick up
[22:26] ---
    "Put A Wish" Zettai hareru!
[22:26] ---
    "Put a Wish" it'll definitely clear up!
[22:29] ---
    Kekka wa... I'm Looking At Nothing...
[22:29] ---
    And the result is, I'm looking at nothing
[22:32] ---
    Mou ichido, yari-naoshi!
[22:32] ---
    One more time, a do-over!
[22:34] ---
    Tama ni wa kakete-miyou
[22:34] ---
    I'll try betting once in a while
[22:39] ---
    Nee kimi ni yudanete-mitai
[22:39] ---
    Hey, I want to try entrusting you with it
[22:44] ---
    Sassou to kake-nukete To Fly
[22:44] ---
    Running through gallantly, to fly
[22:47] ---
    Harema ga mieru The Sky
[22:47] ---
    I can see a break in the weather, the sky
[22:50] ---
    Shinjiteta yo
[22:50] ---
    I had faith
[22:52] ---
    Soshite Make My Way
[22:52] ---
    And then, I make my way
[22:54] ---
    Sotto sashi-dasu kimi no te de
[22:54] ---
    With the hand you quietly reach out
[22:57] ---
    Muteki ni nareru kara So I Go Together
[22:57] ---
    I can become invincible, so I go together
[23:04] ---
    Hoshi ga kirei da ashita mo hareru sa
[23:04] ---
    Stars so beautiful,
    it'll be clear again tomorrow
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Magical Change and I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    It goes so fast. This anime has been
    around for almost half a year now.
[23:37] ---
    Yes, we've made it half a year somehow,
    but we still have a long way to go!
[23:40] ---
    I'll continue to count on you, Hayate.
[23:41] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[23:43] ---
    So, we'll have a new opening
    sequence starting next episode.
[23:45] ---
    The story will also switch to
    "Hayate the Combat Butler! Asgard Arc",
[23:48] ---
    where butlers fight fiercely
    over legendary butler uniforms!
[23:51] ---
    What?! It will?!
[23:52] ---
    Well, probably something like that.
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    What's this Butler Battle Tournament?!
    You're making no sense!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    It's exactly what it sounds like.
[24:02] ---
    I want to check up on the level
    of butlers at our school.
[24:06] ---
    She's the Superintendent?!
[24:08] ---
    How dare you do that to my
    precious Mistress Kuzuha...
[24:09] ---
    You won't get away with this.
[24:11] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:13] ---
    "Hayate Rising".
[24:14] ---
    Hayate, I wish to see it for myself
    with these very eyes
[24:19] ---
    Hayate Rising
[24:19] ---
    when you win the tournament!
[24:21] ---
    Will you be able to survive?

27 - Hayate Rising

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:13] ---
    Here you are, Mistress
    Kuzuha. Please say, "Ah!"
SIGN    Butler Economy, Trade and Industry
[00:20] ---
    The futures index of the butlers
    at our Hakuou Academy is...
[00:24] ---
    Down 3 points.
[00:27] ---
    They have grown soft.
[00:29] ---
    A butler, for example, can get run over
    by a car speeding along at 80kmph
[00:33] ---
    or get trampled by a giant robot...
[00:36] ---
    Pardon. A bit of cream on your mouth.
[00:41] ---
    Only when they can survive such
    things as if it were nothing
[00:43] ---
    can they be considered full-fledged butlers.
[00:46] ---
    Am I not right, Sion?
[00:47] ---
    You are.
[00:50] ---
    But even so...
[00:52] ---
    Let me think...
[00:53] ---
    If there were a butler somewhere
[00:55] ---
    with a look of poverty about him
    that just makes you want to smack him,
[00:56] ---
    who was in his late teens
    and roughly 168cm and 57kg...
[01:01] ---
    If there were?
[01:02] ---
    Well, I would not be against
    giving him some special attention.
[01:11] ---
    It sure is autumn.
[01:15] ---
    It certainly is autumn.
[01:20] ---
    Tama, cut it out.
[01:23] ---
    Hey, cut it out.
[01:28] ---
    Rarrr!
[01:31] ---
    Rarrr!
[01:34] ---
    Rarrr...
[01:36] ---
    Oh?
[01:36] ---
    I-I feel like someone
    is calling to me from somewhere.
[01:40] ---
    I think it's about time we busted out a new.
[01:43] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[01:46] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[01:53] ---
    I know! I have just thought
    of a good way to stave off boredom!
[01:56] ---
    Wait, so uh... Who might you be?
[01:59] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:02] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:04] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:10] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[02:15] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[02:21] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[02:26] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[02:32] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[02:37] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[02:42] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[02:48] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[02:53] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[02:56] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:59] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[03:04] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[03:07] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[03:10] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[03:28] ---
    Hayate Rising
[03:32] ---
    I've done it! It's finally complete!
[03:35] ---
    Congratulations!
[03:36] ---
    You'll win the new author
    award for sure this time!
[03:39] ---
    Y-Yes...
[03:42] ---
    Th-Then make sure to get this manuscript...
[03:45] ---
    Yes, I will send it out to the publisher.
[03:49] ---
    Oh, also...
[03:50] ---
    When you go to school, grab the PSP
    from my desk while you're at it.
[03:55] ---
    Oh, did you forget it there?
[03:57] ---
    It's got Crisis Core in it. I'm working
    on finishing a hardcore challenge.
[04:00] ---
    I'll be counting on you.
[04:02] ---
    Miss!
[04:03] ---
    Um, please get some good rest.
[04:14] ---
    A normal, peaceful morning!
[04:16] ---
    It's a bit disappointing that
    the Miss couldn't make it, though.
[04:20] ---
    Morning, Hayate.
[04:22] ---
    Oh, Hinagiku.
[04:24] ---
    Are you alone? Is Nagi playing hooky again?
[04:27] ---
    Yes, well...
[04:31] ---
    Morning, students of Hakuou Academy.
[04:34] ---
    It is early, but I have some
    interesting information for you.
[04:37] ---
    This voice is...!
[04:38] ---
    Wait! Look, Hinagiku!
[04:43] ---
    I will have you know, this is no joke.
[04:45] ---
    I am serious.
[04:48] ---
    Wh-What was that?
[04:52] ---
    That woman's up to no good again!
[04:56] ---
    Wait...!
[05:07] ---
    Wh-What the?!
SIGN    elzzaD
[05:09] ---
    "D-Dazzle! The First..."
[05:12] ---
    "Hakuou Academy..."
[05:14] ---
    "B-Butler..."
[05:16] ---
    "Battle..."
[05:17] ---
    "Tournament..."
[05:22] ---
    Hinagiku, um, please calm down.
[05:25] ---
    What in the world is this about?
[05:31] ---
    Hayate, you stay back.
[05:35] ---
    Oh-ho, I am surprised
    you knew where to find me.
[05:38] ---
    You are not our student body
    president for nothing, I see.
[05:40] ---
    Um, who is this woman?
[05:42] ---
    She's our school's Superintendent.
[05:44] ---
    S-Superintendent?!
[05:46] ---
    Indeed.
SIGN    Hakuou Academy Butler Battle Tournament to be Held!!
[05:48] ---
    What is this?!
[05:50] ---
    Butler Battle Tournament?!
    You're making no sense!
[05:53] ---
    It's exactly what it sounds like.
[05:55] ---
    I want to check up on the level
    of the butlers at our school.
[05:59] ---
    I also have a somewhat
    personal interest in this.
[06:03] ---
    A strong, tough butler worthy
    of some special attention!
[06:06] ---
    That is what I am looking for!
[06:10] ---
    Th-That gave me the chills
    for some reason...
[06:13] ---
    But she seems like an awfully
    extreme sort of person.
[06:16] ---
    I-In other words,
    you're up to your usual thing
[06:18] ---
    and you plan to have fun by treating
    the students as your toys, don't you?!
[06:22] ---
    "Have fun"?! How insulting!
[06:24] ---
    The ability to fight is one of the most
    important aspects of being a butler!
[06:27] ---
    B-But all the butlers
    at this school are serious students!
[06:33] ---
    For example, take Hayate here.
[06:37] ---
    Huh?
[06:38] ---
    I see, then perhaps
    I shall ask him directly.
[06:42] ---
    W-Wait, have I been made
    the focus of this conversation
[06:45] ---
    before I could even understand
    what's going on?
[06:48] ---
    Boy.
[06:49] ---
    By the looks of it, you seem to be
    at least some sort of butler yourself.
[06:53] ---
    Answer my question.
[06:55] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am.
[06:57] ---
    "A battle tournament such as this
[06:58] ---
    "to test the strength
    of butlers is pointless."
[07:00] ---
    Now... "Yes" or "no"?
[07:02] ---
    What? Uh...
[07:04] ---
    Beep. Beep. Beep.
[07:07] ---
    W-Well, I wouldn't say
    that it was pointless,
[07:09] ---
    b-but I think there might be
    more important things than that.
[07:13] ---
    Like one's dedication to one's mistress...
[07:17] ---
    What?!
[07:18] ---
    Boy!
[07:20] ---
    You understand nothing!
[07:24] ---
    Hayate, take this!
[07:28] ---
    You seem to have some skill.
[07:30] ---
    Hold on! Please don't just drag me
    into your battle world!
[07:35] ---
    But at this rate, you
    still have a long way to go!
[07:41] ---
    Wh-What should I do? This is my fault.
[07:49] ---
    A butler is tasked with
    the protection of his mistress,
[07:52] ---
    even if it should cost him his life.
[07:56] ---
    Boy, what would you do
    if I were out to kill your mistress?
[08:02] ---
    Would you still be able to
    say the same thing then?
[08:05] ---
    That strength is not a particularly
    essential quality for a butler...
[08:08] ---
    Th-That is...
[08:11] ---
    You left yourself open!
[08:15] ---
    A lesson for you!
[08:17] ---
    Watch out!
[08:24] ---
    What?!
[08:26] ---
    She ran out of juice.
[08:28] ---
    Not good... My blood sugar level...
[08:32] ---
    S-Sion... a sna... a snack...
[08:36] ---
    Yes, I already have one waiting
    for you in your room.
[08:39] ---
    Is it sweet?
[08:41] ---
    Yes, very.
[08:43] ---
    Sion...
[08:44] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha...
[08:46] ---
    O-Oh, my!
[08:48] ---
    What in the world is up with these people?
[08:51] ---
    Allow me to explain.
[08:53] ---
    Hakuou Academy Superintendent,
    Kirika Kuzuha,
[08:55] ---
    has triple the combat
    ability of a normal person,
[08:58] ---
    but in exchange, if she uses up her energy,
[09:00] ---
    she just drops like a fly.
[09:05] ---
    How dare you do that
    to my precious Mistress Kuzuha...
[09:08] ---
    You won't get away with this.
[09:10] ---
    Wait, what? I'm going to
    be held solely responsible for that?
[09:20] ---
    What?! This is...!
[09:22] ---
    Could this be the Territory
    formed by this person's Aura?
[09:25] ---
    My name is Sion.
[09:27] ---
    Written as "si" as in "poet"
    and "on" as in "sound".
[09:30] ---
    Sion.
[09:31] ---
    O-Oh, is that so? I am...
[09:38] ---
    This person is good!
[09:39] ---
    I've been robbed of my
    freedom before I knew it!
[09:42] ---
    You're a butler? What
    is this world coming to?
[09:45] ---
    When you are so weak...
[09:52] ---
    Why don't you just give up being a butler
[09:53] ---
    and switch to being a maid?
[09:56] ---
    That would suit you better.
[09:58] ---
    If that makes you angry,
    try entering the Tournament.
[10:01] ---
    The winner will receive
    the privilege of challenging me.
[10:05] ---
    Though, I doubt you could ever manage that.
[10:16] ---
    Uh, um, Hayate, I'm sorry.
[10:19] ---
    For, you know, getting you mixed up in this.
[10:22] ---
    Not at all...
[10:26] ---
    Um!
[10:28] ---
    P-Please pretend you didn't
    see that... just now...
[10:32] ---
    A-All right.
[10:35] ---
    Wh-Where's all this leading to?
[10:38] ---
    What in the world is this
    Butler Battle Tournament?
[10:42] ---
    Um, I'd like to ask you something.
[10:45] ---
    J-Just what kind of person
    is the Superintendent of Hakuou Academy?
[10:50] ---
    And she seems to have some
    sort of history with Hinagiku...
[10:52] ---
    Oh, did you run into her today?
[10:55] ---
    What? Yes...
[10:56] ---
    Yeah, that Superintendent's
    a fantastically troublesome character.
[11:00] ---
    For example, just to stave off boredom,
[11:02] ---
    she changed our field trip destination
[11:03] ---
    to the non-Internet Amazon
    without our consent.
[11:06] ---
    Uh-huh...
[11:07] ---
    Or simply to stave off boredom,
[11:09] ---
    she schemed to open
    a pool made solely for Char.
[11:12] ---
    I see.
[11:14] ---
    So, it's kind of been like that,
[11:15] ---
    with Hinagiku trying
    to protect the students and Earth
[11:17] ---
    from the evil reach
    of the Superintendent's whims.
[11:21] ---
    H-Hold on...
[11:24] ---
    Um, that last part...
[11:25] ---
    Well, here's a bit of friendly advice.
[11:27] ---
    Better not get involved
    with that Superintendent or her butler.
[11:32] ---
    But this Butler Battle Tournament
    sure came out of the blue.
[11:35] ---
    Let's see...
[11:37] ---
    "The winner will be presented
    with a prize of 100 school credits."
[11:41] ---
    That's like a roundabout way of saying
    you can skip all the classes you want.
[11:49] ---
    Hayate, if you don't mind,
    why don't you enter this tournament?
[11:53] ---
    What?!
[11:54] ---
    Wait... Miss, you don't mean...
[11:56] ---
    No, no, I don't care about the 100 credits.
[11:59] ---
    Whether it's there or not,
    I'll skip school when I skip school.
[12:03] ---
    R-Right...
[12:05] ---
    More importantly...
[12:06] ---
    Hayate, I wish to see it for myself
    with these very eyes
[12:11] ---
    when you win the tournament.
[12:13] ---
    W-Win, you say?
[12:15] ---
    Yes!
[12:16] ---
    After all, you must be invincible
    to be a Sanzenin butler.
[12:20] ---
    In other words, you are...
[12:22] ---
    ...invincible!
[12:23] ---
    Invincible!
[12:24] ---
    Which equates to victory!
[12:27] ---
    Miss...
[12:28] ---
    Ooh! I'm starting to get more
    and more excited!
[12:31] ---
    Because knowing you...
[12:33] ---
    Things like this...
[12:34] ---
    ...and this...
[12:36] ---
    ...should be in your arsenal.
[12:37] ---
    And it's not often I get to
    see stuff like that.
[12:41] ---
    Wait... So, with the way this is going,
[12:43] ---
    am I pretty much being forced
    to enter the tournament, no matter what?
[12:46] ---
    But if the Miss has such
    high expectations of me...
[12:54] ---
    Hinagiku Katsura, this is a warning.
[12:57] ---
    Ultimately, you are
    a commoner without a butler.
[13:00] ---
    It would be for your own good
    to mind your own business
[13:02] ---
    and refrain from interfering
    with the Tournament.
[13:06] ---
    I retrieved this tape earlier
    from the student council post box.
[13:11] ---
    Incidentally, the packaging was all sticky
    with brown sugar syrup.
[13:14] ---
    I see, so her snack today consisted
    of Japanese sweets (wagashi).
SIGN    My Master (wagashi)
[13:22] ---
    None of that matters!
[13:24] ---
    Isn't there some way for us
    to intervene in this Tournament?
[13:29] ---
    Having said that, I have no butler...
[13:33] ---
    Oh, what am I going to do?
[13:35] ---
    I've made up my mind!
[13:37] ---
    I'm going to ask Kotetsu!
[13:39] ---
    It must be nice
    for those of you with butlers.
[13:42] ---
    The 100 credits are definitely appealing,
[13:44] ---
    but now, what are Miki and I to do?
[13:47] ---
    You, there! Don't be letting
    the devil's temptation get to you already!
[13:52] ---
    Mm-hm.
[13:54] ---
    Hina, I have a good idea.
[13:59] ---
    Um, perhaps you should refrain
    from anything so dangerous?
[14:03] ---
    No, I've made up my mind.
[14:06] ---
    Maria, I'm going to enter
    the Butler Battle Tournament!
[14:10] ---
    I cannot let the Miss down!
[14:15] ---
    Yes! I'm starting to get more
    and more fired up!
[14:18] ---
    I will try going with the
    flow, in spite of it all!
[14:20] ---
    E-Even with this hot-blooded turn of events,
[14:22] ---
    I guess he's still off in his own world.
[14:25] ---
    What of butler Hayate's fate?
[14:26] ---
    And... the day of the Tournament's
    come around in no time!
[14:34] ---
    A warrior is as good as his word.
    (Bushi ni nigon wa nai.)
[14:38] ---
    Die once and you cannot die again.
    (Ichido shineba nido shinanu.)
[14:46] ---
    A-Are they burning it up over there?
[14:50] ---
    And now, we hereby commence Dazzle!
[14:53] ---
    The First Hakuou Academy
    Butler Battle Tournament!
[14:59] ---
    I am the Superintendent
    of this academy, Kirika Kuzuha!
[15:03] ---
    All of you, vie against one another!
[15:04] ---
    Compete ruthlessly!
[15:06] ---
    I expect tough fights worthy
    of this great stage for butlers!
[15:11] ---
    It's finally time, Hayate!
[15:13] ---
    Y-Yes.
[15:18] ---
    Please wait for me, poem person!
[15:21] ---
    And now, we'll begin the first match!
[15:24] ---
    In the red corner, the butler
    of some household, Other 1!
[15:32] ---
    And in the blue corner, butler of
    the Segawa household, Kotetsu!
[15:42] ---
    I never knew the committee
    chairman had a butler.
[15:45] ---
    But no one's coming out.
[15:49] ---
    After I begged him to come, too!
SIGN    Thank you!! Urakari Main Line
[15:57] ---
    Farewell, Urakari Main Line!
[15:59] ---
    Th-This roundish shape of the
    train carriage is just to die for!
[16:02] ---
    Right?! Right, right?!
[16:03] ---
    R-Red corner wins by default!
[16:07] ---
    Don't be mean!
[16:10] ---
    Next up, the second match.
[16:20] ---
    Yo, Ayasaki! So yer in this, too, eh?
[16:22] ---
    O-One of the members of the
    "very generous people" folk?!
[16:26] ---
    How in the world?!
[16:29] ---
    I hired him as an interim butler.
[16:31] ---
    M-Miss Asakaze!
[16:33] ---
    I lost at rock-paper-scissors to Miki, so...
[16:37] ---
    I used my connections to get a pinch hitter.
[16:38] ---
    What kind of connections do you have?
[16:40] ---
    Rock-paper-scissors?
[16:41] ---
    Fight!
[16:43] ---
    Get him!
[16:45] ---
    Beat him to a pulp!
[16:46] ---
    Stick it to him good!
[16:55] ---
    What?
[16:56] ---
    Y-You win!
[16:57] ---
    Um, please, just don't
    tell anyone about that!
[17:00] ---
    Allow me to explain.
[17:01] ---
    A butler's necktie is his soul.
[17:04] ---
    Regardless of the amount of damage
    or if there is even any damage,
[17:07] ---
    the butler whose necktie
    gets taken first loses.
[17:11] ---
    Th-The winner is Kashiwagi,
    butler of the Asakaze household!
[17:15] ---
    O-Oh, right, his name is Mr. Kashiwagi.
[17:19] ---
    But...
[17:20] ---
    Kashiwagi! Kashiwagi!
[17:21] ---
    Good work!
[17:22] ---
    Keep it up and get me those 100 credits.
[17:25] ---
    I'll be sure to do the work
    I've been paid to do.
SIGN    Heh Heh Heh
[17:28] ---
    S-So black... There's something
    so black about them.
[17:32] ---
    Next up, the third match!
[17:34] ---
    In the red corner, butler of the Azumamiya
    household, Kaede Nonohara!
[17:44] ---
    Nonohara, go for the win!
[17:46] ---
    Get the 100 credits!
[17:47] ---
    Fight!
[17:52] ---
    Nonohara...
[17:53] ---
    And... his opponent is...
[17:55] ---
    What?!
[18:04] ---
    Power of Flower
[18:07] ---
    And someday, even that bud
[18:09] ---
    It's me!
[18:11] ---
    Will bloom large right
    in the middle of your heart
[18:13] ---
    Interim butler of the Hanabishi
    household, Hinagiku Katsura!
[18:18] ---
    Power of Flower
[18:19] ---
    Wh-Why is Hinagiku...
[18:22] ---
    ...a-a butler?
[18:24] ---
    That is because I won against
    Risa at rock-paper-scissors
[18:27] ---
    and I gained the draft rights.
[18:29] ---
    Hina wants to upset
    the Superintendent's plans.
[18:31] ---
    I want the 100 credits.
[18:34] ---
    Well, it's a so-called
    aligning of interests.
[18:38] ---
    With this, victory is ours!
[18:43] ---
    Good grief, an interim butler, is it?
[18:45] ---
    People seem to have a lot of contempt
    for our profession these days.
[18:49] ---
    If I've offended you, I'm sorry.
[18:51] ---
    But by no means did I enter
    this Tournament as a joke.
[18:56] ---
    Then, shall we begin?!
[19:01] ---
    Yes!
[19:02] ---
    I-Incredible!
[19:16] ---
    Oh-ho. You're pretty good.
[19:20] ---
    Nonohara, you seem awfully sure of yourself.
[19:23] ---
    Why haven't you tried
    to use your super lethal technique?
[19:26] ---
    Th-That is...
[19:28] ---
    Nonohara, go for the win!
    Get the 100 credits!
[19:31] ---
    But don't hit Miss Katsura!
[19:36] ---
    No matter how powerful your technique is,
[19:40] ---
    I, Hinagiku Katsura, will repel all
    your attacks with everything I have!
[19:47] ---
    Understood.
[19:48] ---
    Then here I go.
[19:54] ---
    Safety Shutter!
SIGN    Safety Shutter
     Super Explosive Flaming Slash of Darkness
[20:04] ---
    I-I will not be beat!
[20:10] ---
    What's wrong? Is that all you've got?
[20:13] ---
    Safety...!
[20:18] ---
    Nonohara, the build-up to your
    technique takes a bit too long.
[20:25] ---
    I win.
[20:28] ---
    Th-The winner is Hinagiku Katsura!
[20:34] ---
    Thank you.
[20:35] ---
    For not going easy on me,
    just because I'm a girl.
[20:38] ---
    A butler fights with everything he has,
    no matter the opponent.
[20:43] ---
    Besides...
[20:44] ---
    Even my master does not wish
    for me to win against you.
[20:49] ---
    Nonohara...
[20:52] ---
    How did you like that?!
    I'm one step closer to you two now!
[20:58] ---
    She's great.
[20:59] ---
    Yes, she is.
[21:01] ---
    Hinagiku...
[21:03] ---
    And finally, it was Hayate's turn.
[21:07] ---
    Okay, next match!
[21:09] ---
    In the red corner, butler of the
    Sanzenin household, Hayate Ayasaki!
[21:13] ---
    All right, here goes!
[21:15] ---
    Now, who will be my opponent?
[21:20] ---
    In the blue corner! Who the heck
    is it under that mask?!
[21:23] ---
    Mystery butler!
[21:27] ---
    Free-style K!
[21:30] ---
    Who could that be?
[21:32] ---
    That air of dignity could only be
    that of a true master.
[21:34] ---
    Yes. And he's even got
    a strange tiger with him, too.
[21:38] ---
    Who in the world is it?
[21:40] ---
    I don't know.
[21:41] ---
    But don't let your guard down, Hayate.
[21:42] ---
    Who might this mystery butler and tiger be?
[21:47] ---
    Next time, he will fight against
    a critically desperate situation.
[21:51] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:53] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:57] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:06] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:37] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:05] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:08] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:25] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:26] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    G'morn! I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:32] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:33] ---
    With a new warning, opening,
    and ending, it's a fresh start.
[23:36] ---
    Yes, it is, Miss.
[23:37] ---
    Looks like we can fight
    for another half a year with this.
[23:40] ---
    I had all kinds of worries, but I guess
    things have a way of working out.
[23:42] ---
    That's not entirely true. This show has
    a lot of people keeping an eye on it.
[23:45] ---
    About the new opening song
    we have starting today...
[23:48] ---
    It's on a grand scale that makes
    you think of the universe, isn't it?
[23:50] ---
    You think so?
[23:51] ---
    Though, of course,
    it's still quite a nice song.
[23:53] ---
    Buh-bye!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    I guess it's been many months since then.
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Hayate, you're always doing your best
    and I'm grateful to you for that.
[24:04] ---
    Miss...
[24:05] ---
    Hakuou Academy Butler Battle Tournament
    finally gets to the championship round.
[24:09] ---
    Will Hayate Ayasaki manage
    to remain a contender?
[24:14] ---
    There is something
    I absolutely must protect!
[24:17] ---
    Hayate!
[24:17] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
    Black Hayate
[24:18] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:19] ---
    "Black Hayate".
[24:21] ---
    At crosswalks, even
    when you have a green light,
[24:23] ---
    make sure you look around
    and cross carefully!

28 - Black Hayate

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    Last time!
[00:11] ---
    Thanks to the Superintendent's
    caprious-icious-icious nature,
[00:14] ---
    a Butler Battle Tournament
    was suddenly held at Hakuou Academy!
[00:19] ---
    Nonohara, the build-up to your
    technique takes a bit too long.
[00:24] ---
    One fierce fight after another and another,
[00:25] ---
    and the butler of the Sanzenin
    household, Hayate Ayasaki, also...
[00:28] ---
    ...brilliantly cleared the first
    round after a life-and-death struggle!
[00:33] ---
    Wh-What incredible fighting spirit!
[00:34] ---
    What kind of super lethal
    technique could he have?
[00:38] ---
    Here he comes, Hayate!
[00:39] ---
    That's right! This
    is no time to be faltering!
[00:41] ---
    I absolutely have to let
    the Miss see me at my best here!
[00:48] ---
    Huh?
[00:52] ---
    The winner is Hayate Ayasaki,
    butler of the Sanzenin household!
[00:56] ---
    Huh? Wait... What?!
[00:58] ---
    Uh, um, but I haven't done anything yet...
[01:03] ---
    So you shredded his clothes
    with the power of your chi!
[01:06] ---
    That's my Hayate!
[01:07] ---
    End of summary.
[01:09] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[01:13] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[01:19] ---
    Oh, my, look at the silly
    mask you're wearing, Mr. Klaus.
[01:22] ---
    You're the only one who noticed, Maria.
[01:25] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:27] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:30] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:36] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[01:41] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[01:46] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[01:52] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[01:58] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[02:03] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[02:08] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[02:14] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[02:19] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[02:22] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:25] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:30] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:33] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:36] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[02:54] ---
    Black Hayate
[02:58] ---
    Yes, they say a true master can win
    without laying a finger on his foe.
SIGN    Infrared
[03:06] ---
    Hayate, I never imagined
    you had gotten to that point.
[03:10] ---
    W-Well...
[03:12] ---
    Um, my opponent destroyed himself
    all on his own in that match...
[03:18] ---
    Here you are, Miss.
[03:19] ---
    Ah! Thank you.
[03:24] ---
    Say, Hayate, sitting here like this
    sort of reminds you, doesn't it?
[03:28] ---
    Oh? Of what?
[03:31] ---
    Hey, now, don't tell me you've forgotten!
[03:34] ---
    You know, that day.
[03:35] ---
    Oh!
[03:37] ---
    I guess it's been many months since then.
[03:39] ---
    Hayate, you're always doing your best
    and I'm grateful to you for that.
[03:44] ---
    Here, you drink this!
[03:47] ---
    Miss...
[03:48] ---
    I mean, after all, we need you
    to do your best and grab that victory.
[03:54] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[04:07] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
[04:08] ---
    That's... Himuro?
[04:10] ---
    Sheesh! Shrieking their heads off just
    because he's a bit good-looking.
[04:14] ---
    You're way cooler than him!
[04:16] ---
    Oh, please...
[04:18] ---
    Heave-ho!
[04:19] ---
    Little Master, this will be it then.
[04:22] ---
    I see, so Himuro's in this Tournament, too.
[04:25] ---
    All right!
[04:26] ---
    I'll be sure to witness your
    lethal technique with my own eyes!
[04:32] ---
    Okay, we're going to get started.
[04:34] ---
    The Saginomiya household Men
    in Black Tri-Stars versus...
[04:37] ---
    ...Ohkouchi household butler, Himuro Saeki!
[04:42] ---
    Three versus one?! That's playing dirty!
[04:45] ---
    How rude! We, the men in black
    of the Saginomiya household...
[04:48] ---
    W-We three are one!
[04:50] ---
    We are as one in body and spirit!
[04:52] ---
    The Girls' Squad!
[04:54] ---
    What an interesting thing to say.
[04:57] ---
    Fight!
[05:10] ---
    Then here we go.
[05:18] ---
    Bonjour?
[05:19] ---
    Uh, um, where is the venue
    for the Butler Battle Tournament?
[05:25] ---
    Ça va, ça va.
[05:27] ---
    Oh, dear, oh, dear. Oh, dear, oh, dear.
[05:30] ---
    I have this terrible feeling
[05:32] ---
    that I was unable to be present to
    witness yet another crucial moment.
[05:41] ---
    Th-The winner is Himuro Saeki!
[05:45] ---
    M-Miss Isumi is always getting lost...
[05:48] ---
    A-And she has a hard
    time getting to school...
[05:52] ---
    S-So we wanted to get the prize
    of 100 school credits for her...
[05:59] ---
    Himuro, good work!
[06:01] ---
    I hope I get to see you win soon!
[06:04] ---
    I will be counting on you to pay me
    my bonus, Little Master Taiga.
[06:08] ---
    I-I couldn't see anything
    of that crucial super lethal technique...
[06:13] ---
    Y-Yes...
[06:15] ---
    I have to make sure to step up my game, too!
[06:17] ---
    But as chance would have it,
    contrary to his determination...
[06:23] ---
    Fight!
[06:26] ---
    Kame-hame...
[06:31] ---
    Y-You win...
[06:35] ---
    Ayasaki wins!
[06:37] ---
    What?!
[06:39] ---
    Wh-Why?
[06:41] ---
    That's right. Terrified
    by how Hayate won his first fight,
SIGN    You win.
[06:45] ---
    his opponent small fry butlers
    forfeited one after another.
[06:49] ---
    And the competition continued,
[06:52] ---
    quickly determining the top 4 contenders.
[06:55] ---
    First match of the semi-finals!
[06:57] ---
    The Hanabishi family part-time
    butler, Hinagiku Katsura!
[07:05] ---
    The Asakaze family
    part-time butler, Kashiwagi!
[07:13] ---
    My butler...
[07:14] ---
    ...ran away!
[07:15] ---
    R-Rissy...
[07:17] ---
    Wh-Why?!
[07:19] ---
    She probably couldn't
    keep paying him anymore.
[07:22] ---
    Th-The winner is my little sister!
[07:25] ---
    We've got our first championship contender!
[07:33] ---
    Hina, do your best out there
    for my sake, too.
[07:37] ---
    Risa...
[07:39] ---
    This is just a token of my appreciation.
[07:45] ---
    Wait! This is the bill
    from the butler you hired!
[07:50] ---
    Well, I'd been buying
    the "Ikki Tousen" DVDs,
[07:52] ---
    because I wanted to see the protagonist,
    who doesn't show up very much,
[07:55] ---
    and I went over my credit card limit.
[07:57] ---
    Pay it yourself! Pay it yourself!
[08:01] ---
    Was it really all right
    for me to end up in the top 4?
[08:07] ---
    That, too, must have been Heaven's will.
[08:09] ---
    Wait, y-you can even
    hear what I'm thinking?!
[08:12] ---
    The Sanzenin family butler, Hayate Ayasaki!
[08:19] ---
    You've been summoned.
[08:21] ---
    R-Right!
[08:29] ---
    The Ohkouchi family butler, Himuro Saeki!
[08:38] ---
    Himuro, why did you enter this Tournament?
[08:42] ---
    Why?
[08:43] ---
    Why? Because I...
[08:47] ---
    ...love money!
[09:10] ---
    H-Hayate!
[09:12] ---
    That kid is doing better than I expected.
[09:15] ---
    Indeed.
[09:19] ---
    That's Himuro for you.
[09:21] ---
    I let him set the pace in spite of myself.
[09:24] ---
    B-But...
[09:27] ---
    This finally...
[09:29] ---
    ...feels like a battle now!
[09:35] ---
    Huh?
[09:39] ---
    Little Master Taiga?
[09:41] ---
    Mm-hm, I see.
[09:43] ---
    You are being attacked
    by a terrifying savage beast?
[09:47] ---
    I-I'm sorry!
[09:49] ---
    I wanted you to do your best,
[09:52] ---
    so I went to buy you a snack, but...
[09:55] ---
    Very well. I shall be there right away.
[09:59] ---
    Hayate, we shall have to
    do this at another time.
[10:04] ---
    Wha?! Wait!
[10:06] ---
    Darn it! No helping it then!
[10:08] ---
    The winner is Hayate Ayasaki!
[10:10] ---
    What?!
[10:12] ---
    A-Again?
[10:14] ---
    Ah! That little bastard.
[10:16] ---
    He ran off because he got scared of Hayate!
[10:18] ---
    O-Oh, that's right.
[10:20] ---
    The fact that I've technically
    won this match means...
[10:25] ---
    S-So my next opponent is Hinagiku...
[10:29] ---
    This is rough.
[10:30] ---
    Should he actually be happy
    with his victory?
[10:34] ---
    We are finally getting
    to the championship round.
[10:39] ---
    A Nurarihyon monster! (Nurarihyon!)
[10:40] ---
    What?! (E?!)
[10:43] ---
    May I breathe through my gills?
    (Era-kokyuu shitemo ii desuka?)
[10:46] ---
    Interim butler of the Hanabishi
    household, Hinagiku Katsura!
[10:49] ---
    Here!
[10:55] ---
    Sanzenin household butler, Hayate Ayasaki!
[10:58] ---
    H-Here!
[11:06] ---
    You have both done well to make it this far.
[11:11] ---
    The way you fought was quite valiant.
[11:13] ---
    But uh, I don't recall
    having fought much at all...
[11:16] ---
    Now, enter this championship
    round with care!
[11:19] ---
    As the representative of the students,
[11:22] ---
    the winner will receive
    the privilege of challenging Sion here.
[11:25] ---
    You have no objections, I trust?
[11:26] ---
    I do not.
[11:27] ---
    I-I suppose not...
[11:30] ---
    To inspire the two of you,
[11:32] ---
    we will now take a moment
    to unveil the new school song.
[11:35] ---
    I stayed up all night writing
    and composing it myself!
[11:38] ---
    An immortal masterpiece!
[11:41] ---
    A-A new school song?
[11:44] ---
    Hayate, you should take this
    opportunity to learn for yourself
[11:48] ---
    just how dreadful the Superintendent is.
[11:50] ---
    I entered this Tournament
    in order to defeat her.
[11:54] ---
    Hinagiku...
SIGN    Hakuou Academy
    School Song
[11:57] ---
    The white school reigning
    over the land of Suginami
[12:05] ---
    Our mother school
[12:09] ---
    Fire up that engine in your heart
[12:12] ---
    Hakuou! Hakuou!
[12:16] ---
    Six mega shock!
[12:18] ---
    Employment rate of 120
[12:20] ---
    Hakuou Academy!
[12:24] ---
    Calm down!
[12:25] ---
    Calm down and count the prime numbers!
[12:26] ---
    Struck by its overwhelming splendor,
    it seems everyone is in a frenzy.
[12:28] ---
    Hakuou! Hakuou!
[12:30] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha!
[12:32] ---
    Zhuge Liang's trap
[12:32] ---
    See?
[12:33] ---
    Th-This is definitely...
[12:35] ---
    She needs to be brought down.
[12:35] ---
    Hakuou! Hakuou!
[12:37] ---
    If we allow her to continue
    as she pleases, our academy will be...
[12:39] ---
    Update blogs daily
[12:41] ---
    Hakuou Academy!
[12:43] ---
    Superintendent!
[12:45] ---
    I will win against
    that person, without fail!
[12:48] ---
    But of course, I will refuse the prize!
[12:51] ---
    Are you okay with that? Mikky?
[12:53] ---
    I-I do not mind.
[12:55] ---
    Because we are the student council!
[12:57] ---
    We cannot set an example of playing hooky!
[12:59] ---
    But you're always playing hooky.
[13:04] ---
    100 credits?
[13:05] ---
    Offering a prize like that...
[13:06] ---
    It's an awful thing for the students
    who take attending class seriously!
[13:10] ---
    This academy is not your toy!
[13:13] ---
    Ladies and gentlemen of the student body,
    I will defeat the Superintendent!
[13:16] ---
    And I will bring reform to this academy!
[13:21] ---
    Please give me the strength
    to reform Hakuou Academy!
[13:26] ---
    Hayate, you heard what I said.
[13:28] ---
    But a match is a match.
[13:30] ---
    Wh-What should I do? She's serious.
[13:33] ---
    I'm in a real jam now.
[13:36] ---
    Absolute destiny: Apocalypse.
[13:46] ---
    Okay, here we go!
[13:48] ---
    Final match!
[13:50] ---
    Hinagiku Katsura versus Hayate Ayasaki!
[13:55] ---
    Super Battle Time!
[14:00] ---
    Here I come!
[14:06] ---
    P-Please stop, Hinagiku!
[14:09] ---
    There's no reason for us to fight!
[14:12] ---
    Don't tell me you're holding
    back because I'm a girl!
[14:20] ---
    Truly, not his home crowd.
[14:22] ---
    Hayate, it's unsportsmanlike
    to just keep running away!
[14:25] ---
    Fight me fair and square!
[14:32] ---
    Hey, Hayate, pull yourself together!
[14:35] ---
    What?!
[14:36] ---
    Why are you so by-the-book?
[14:38] ---
    Being a butler isn't just about
    using your strength to hurt others.
[14:42] ---
    Hayate, you must know that well.
[14:45] ---
    Miss...
[14:48] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[14:51] ---
    Come, Hayate, fight me!
[15:01] ---
    Hinagiku, I am sorry about this.
[15:03] ---
    I get that you're serious about protecting
    the academy from the Superintendent.
[15:10] ---
    But there is something
    I absolutely must protect!
[15:19] ---
    Th-The winner is Hayate Ayasaki!
[15:32] ---
    Uh, um, Hinagiku...?
[15:36] ---
    Perv.
[15:38] ---
    But well, I guess a loss is a loss.
[15:40] ---
    I was too worked up about this anyway.
[15:42] ---
    I guess it just means
    I still need a lot of training.
[15:45] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, I hate that I lost,
[15:47] ---
    but I'll entrust you with the future
    of Hakuou Academy this time.
[15:51] ---
    What?
[15:53] ---
    That's okay, right? Ladies
    and gentlemen of the student body?
[15:58] ---
    No, uh...
[16:00] ---
    Entrusting me with such
    an outrageous thing is...
[16:03] ---
    He will be representing us,
    the students of Hakuou!
[16:06] ---
    Come accept the challenge, fair and square,
[16:09] ---
    Sion Kuresato, butler to the Superintendent!
[16:11] ---
    Oh! Wait!
[16:21] ---
    Show them exactly what you are capable of.
[16:24] ---
    With pleasure.
[16:26] ---
    You. Shall we get on with it?
[16:28] ---
    Hayate, it'll be fine.
    Knowing you, I'm sure you'll win.
[16:31] ---
    Wait, Hinagiku, please don't move
    the story along without me!
[16:35] ---
    Hayate!
[16:37] ---
    Well, uh, how to say this?
[16:39] ---
    I've been plenty satisfied with the way
    you've fought so far, of course,
[16:44] ---
    but Hayate, to see you
    coolly knockout an opponent...
[16:48] ---
    That's what I'd love to see for myself!
[16:52] ---
    It seems there's no turning back now.
[16:55] ---
    I will do it!
[16:56] ---
    Yes, that's the spirit, Hayate!
[16:59] ---
    With the future of the academy at stake!
[17:13] ---
    Fight!
[17:14] ---
    At any rate, I just have to make sure
    not to get caught in that weird technique.
[17:19] ---
    It's no use, Ayasaki.
[17:25] ---
    Shoot!
[17:27] ---
    My "poetic world" sends the piano
    melody directly into your brain.
[17:32] ---
    You can no longer escape
    from within this domain.
[17:37] ---
    Huh? W-What's wrong, Ayasaki?
[17:42] ---
    That's...
[17:43] ---
    Hayate, aim for the feet!
[17:46] ---
    Break your opponent's stance!
[17:48] ---
    Once you shatter the focus,
    that technique should also...!
[17:51] ---
    Hinagiku...
[17:53] ---
    Not so fast!
[18:07] ---
    Sh-Shoot! M-My true identity!
[18:11] ---
    Uh, um... Your "true"..?
[18:13] ---
    Could it be that you're...?
[18:15] ---
    D-Don't say it!
[18:17] ---
    Take that! And that! And that! And that!
[18:20] ---
    Allow me to explain.
SIGN    Top Secret
    Sion's Secret
SIGN    Sion
SIGN    Girl Sion
[18:21] ---
    The Superintendent's butler, Sion Kuresato,
[18:24] ---
    is actually a female student
    at the middle school.
[18:25] ---
    When the Secret Boots come off,
[18:27] ---
    she can no longer maintain
    her elegant appearance
[18:29] ---
    and she ends up revealing her
    true identity of a young girl.
[18:32] ---
    Hey, those two are completely
    different characters!
[18:35] ---
    Take that! And that!
[18:36] ---
    I-I'm an adult! I'm no pipsqueak!
[18:40] ---
    A-A cool adult, suitable
    to be in Mistress Kuzuha's company!
[18:47] ---
    Sion, stop this already. You have lost.
[18:50] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha...
[18:51] ---
    Your smaller form is fine in its own way.
[18:54] ---
    Let us withdraw for today
    and craft poems of love together.
[18:58] ---
    Yes, Mistress.
[19:03] ---
    Uh, um...
[19:09] ---
    You seem like a toy
    that will be quite fun to play with.
[19:13] ---
    What?!
[19:14] ---
    J-Just you remember this!
[19:16] ---
    I'll be sure to get back at you for this!
SIGN    Silence!
[19:28] ---
    Uh, um...
[19:30] ---
    What to do about this atmosphere...?
[19:38] ---
    Uh...
[19:39] ---
    And thus, the Butler Battle
    Tournament came to an end.
[19:50] ---
    Take that!
[19:55] ---
    I said it's over and it's over!
[19:57] ---
    Oh! A jellyfish!
[19:58] ---
    Oh, I wonder if jellyfish are edible?!
[20:03] ---
    So, um... Wh-What ultimately
    became of the prize of 100 credits?
[20:10] ---
    Hm? She gave it to us.
[20:11] ---
    The one thing that Superintendent
    doesn't do, at least, is lie.
[20:15] ---
    Th-Then...
[20:16] ---
    No, we respectfully declined it.
[20:19] ---
    What?
[20:19] ---
    Sheesh!
[20:20] ---
    I feel bad for always making
    you skip school with me...
[20:23] ---
    And after all the trouble I went to...
[20:25] ---
    Oh, could it be
[20:27] ---
    that she did this out of concern
    for Hayate's attendance record?
[20:30] ---
    I am grateful for your considerate thought.
[20:32] ---
    But I will fit school in between my duties
    and make it work somehow.
[20:37] ---
    Go!
[20:44] ---
    Looks like even the champion
    of the Battle Tournament
[20:46] ---
    is a pushover when it comes to games.
[20:49] ---
    N-Next time, I will be sure to win!
[20:52] ---
    Come on! Come at me however you like!
[20:54] ---
    Here I go!
SIGN    Victory
[21:01] ---
    Sion, what did you think
    of that boy named Ayasaki?
[21:05] ---
    What did I think? Um...
[21:07] ---
    That boy is unexpectedly...
[21:11] ---
    ...enticing.
[21:13] ---
    What?
[21:15] ---
    I've made up my mind!
[21:16] ---
    Enough of that Battle Tournament!
[21:26] ---
    Come forth, mysterious
    Butler Corps of Darkness!
[21:29] ---
    We will make Hayate Ayasaki one of us,
    by any means necessary!
[21:42] ---
    What might this mysterious
    Butler Corps of Darkness be?
SIGN    Butler Corps of Darkness VS Hayate
[21:46] ---
    And what of the fate
    of Hayate and the others?
[21:48] ---
    Next time, they will fight against a Gundam
    model fanatic's extensive knowledge.
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:05] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Sign: Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    From good morning to good night,
    I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:35] ---
    The story's starting to take
    a boys' manga type of turn.
[23:38] ---
    Are you going to be fighting
    groups of monsters every week now?
[23:41] ---
    No, we have a normal story next week.
[23:44] ---
    The anime staff seems to be going
    through a lot of trial and error.
[23:47] ---
    I guess original story developments
    can be quite difficult.
[23:50] ---
    I agree, Miss.
[23:52] ---
    So, don't miss the staff's struggles!
[23:54] ---
    Bye-good!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    Young Sir, my mother suggested I go
    to a match-making meeting yesterday.
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:02] ---
    Really? That's great...
[24:04] ---
    Oh, Mother? Please set up
    that meeting as soon as you can!
[24:07] ---
    Yes, full speed ahead.
[24:09] ---
    What? Oh, wait, Saki?!
[24:10] ---
    So, tomorrow on Sunday, I will be going
    to a match-making meeting.
[24:13] ---
    What?!
[24:15] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:16] ---
    "Match-Making Meeting".
[24:16] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
    Match-Making Meeting
[24:17] ---
    Did you know?
[24:18] ---
    

29 - Match-Making Meeting

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:05] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:15] ---
    If you have a match-making meeting,
    do you always get married?
[00:17] ---
    Huh? What's this about all of a sudden?
[00:21] ---
    Well, uh... actually...
[00:25] ---
    Saki went out drinking
    with her friends two nights ago
[00:28] ---
    and she was out late, so she stayed
    the night at her parents' house.
[00:32] ---
    Then, she came back yesterday morning and...
SIGN    Video Rental V Tachibana
[00:40] ---
    Oh, back already?
[00:43] ---
    You don't go home much,
    so you could've spent more time there.
[00:48] ---
    No, I did not wish to cause you any worry,
[00:51] ---
    so I came back as quickly as I could.
[00:53] ---
    Like I said, I wasn't worried or anything.
[00:57] ---
    I-Incidentally, there were men
    at our get-together last night, too.
[01:00] ---
    I don't care about that stuff.
[01:03] ---
    Also, my mother suggested I go
    to a match-making meeting.
[01:07] ---
    Hah! That's great!
[01:14] ---
    Oh, Mother? Please set up
    that meeting as soon as you can!
[01:18] ---
    Yes, full speed ahead.
[01:19] ---
    What? Oh, wait, Saki?!
[01:21] ---
    All right, I understand.
[01:23] ---
    So, tomorrow on Sunday,
    I will be going to a match-making meeting.
[01:27] ---
    Therefore, I will be taking some time off.
    I assume that will be fine?!
[01:29] ---
    What?!
[01:38] ---
    So, she's been out since this morning.
[01:41] ---
    That's unexpected to hear,
[01:43] ---
    but she's going to the meeting
    because she wants to get married, right?
[01:47] ---
    The look on your face shows
    an awfully self-centered disgruntlement.
[01:50] ---
    Wha?!
[01:51] ---
    No helping it then.
    I guess I'll help you out.
[01:53] ---
    What?
[01:54] ---
    Well, well, a match-makin' meetin', huh?
[01:57] ---
    It'll be chock full
    of opportunities to make jabs.
[01:59] ---
    I've never witnessed a match-making meeting.
[02:02] ---
    Then why don't you all go
    watch the match-making meeting?
[02:05] ---
    Wha?!
[02:05] ---
    Yes! That's a good idea!
[02:08] ---
    Wha?!
[02:09] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[02:12] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[02:17] ---
    Who gives a damn?!
    Now's not the time for that!
[02:19] ---
    Saki just might end up leaving, you know!
[02:24] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:27] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:30] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:35] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[02:41] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[02:46] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[02:51] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[02:57] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[03:02] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[03:08] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[03:13] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[03:19] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[03:22] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[03:24] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[03:30] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[03:32] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[03:35] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[03:54] ---
    Match-Making Meeting
[04:04] ---
    Everyone should be there about now.
[04:08] ---
    A match-making meeting
    in this day and age!
[04:09] ---
    It could be nice with a certain charm to it.
[04:13] ---
    Then, we shall leave it
    to the young couple from here on out.
[04:16] ---
    Sounds good!
[04:20] ---
    No!
[04:21] ---
    Please have mercy, my lord magistrate!
[04:24] ---
    Oh, no!
[04:25] ---
    Come, come, it will be fine!
[04:25] ---
    Someone, please save me!
[04:29] ---
    Oh, my! What am I thinking?!
[04:31] ---
    More like, that's not
    a match-making meeting.
[04:34] ---
    Damn. A match-making meeting?
    What the hell is that?
[04:41] ---
    This is one of the most
    distinguished restaurants in the city.
[04:44] ---
    I'll have you know,
    we are not reusing Isumi's house.
[04:48] ---
    Darn it! To think Saki's
    having a match-making meeting
[04:50] ---
    with some strange guy somewhere in there...!
[04:53] ---
    I got it!
[04:54] ---
    It seems Saki is participating
    in their standard Young Couple Time.
[04:58] ---
    What the heck is that?
[04:59] ---
    In other words, they take
    a stroll around the garden alone
[05:02] ---
    and jabber on about
    their hobbies and things.
[05:04] ---
    Like doin' a married couple comedy routine.
[05:07] ---
    J-Just the two of them?!
[05:09] ---
    But the garden here is so vast,
    it's called the Forest of the Lost.
[05:13] ---
    And it seems women who have
    participated in match-making parties
[05:15] ---
    have gone missing here.
[05:17] ---
    What?!
[05:18] ---
    Saki and her guy may have
    become skeletons by now, too.
[05:21] ---
    We're finding them at all costs!
[05:23] ---
    No matter what, they won't turn
    into skeletons so quickly.
[05:26] ---
    No, no, this degree of tension
    just makes it more interesting.
[05:51] ---
    It's so nice and fatty!
[05:56] ---
    N-Nice to meet you!
[05:58] ---
    I am Kyonosuke Kaoru
    and I teach at Hakuou Academy!
[06:02] ---
    I am Saki Kijima.
[06:04] ---
    Allow me to explain.
[06:05] ---
    Kyonosuke Kaoru has appeared
    as a minor character,
[06:08] ---
    but he's had a piddly number of lines.
[06:10] ---
    Now, he's going to talk his head off.
[06:13] ---
    I-I apologize for dragging
    you out here today.
[06:16] ---
    N-Not at all. I feel the same way...
[06:19] ---
    Um, uh... What are your interests?
[06:21] ---
    What should I do?
[06:22] ---
    I build Gundam models on occasion.
[06:23] ---
    I got carried away and I ended up here,
[06:24] ---
    Uh, did you know that back in the day,
[06:26] ---
    but I have no plan to get married...
[06:26] ---
    you could buy an Elmeth
    for 300 yen before tax?
[06:30] ---
    An Elmeth is a Gundam model, by the way.
[06:30] ---
    I feel terrible for doing this to him...
[06:32] ---
    The Federation feared
    the Elmeth as the "tricorn hat"
[06:34] ---
    and it was also known
    as the Ghost of Solomon.
[06:36] ---
    Though, when it was first released,
[06:39] ---
    it was packaged under the name
    "Elmeth", just like in the show.
[06:39] ---
    Well, I sure was young back then...
[06:42] ---
    Or rather, I must explain
    how things ended up this way.
SIGN    Pub Charm Droplets
[06:49] ---
    Cheers!
[06:55] ---
    So? How are things these days, Saki?
[06:57] ---
    What?
[06:58] ---
    That's right, how are things?
[07:00] ---
    "H-How are things?"
[07:02] ---
    That's what I should be asking you.
[07:04] ---
    What's going on with
    your job search, you two?
[07:08] ---
    I-Is being unproductive a crime?!
[07:10] ---
    We're working on self-realization!
    You know, self-realization!
[07:13] ---
    Sorry, I was wrong. I won't ask anymore.
[07:14] ---
    No one cares about that stuff.
[07:16] ---
    When girls get together and say,
    "How are things lately?"
[07:18] ---
    it's about men, of course!
[07:22] ---
    Wh-Why are you so intent on this?
[07:24] ---
    I have no need of a boyfriend.
[07:25] ---
    Besides, I'm too busy with work
    for that sort of thing.
[07:28] ---
    What a terribly mundane response.
[07:30] ---
    No attractive man is going to
    pay attention to you like that.
[07:33] ---
    Not to worry.
[07:35] ---
    I believe I get plenty of attention
    from an attractive man.
[07:39] ---
    What was with that comment?!
    So you do have a boyfriend?!
[07:42] ---
    N-No, uh...
[07:43] ---
    Give us the details!
[07:44] ---
    So, I mean, uh...
[07:49] ---
    Shoot. I didn't think I'd be out so late.
[07:53] ---
    There's no train that goes back
    to Nakano-Sakaue at this hour...
[07:57] ---
    I have no choice.
[07:58] ---
    I will call the Young Sir
    to make sure he does not worry
[08:00] ---
    and I will stay the night
    at my parent's today.
[08:02] ---
    Oh, okay, so you're not coming back.
[08:05] ---
    Uh, um, you sound rather happy about that.
[08:08] ---
    Really?
[08:09] ---
    It's not like I'm thinking I won't
    get scolded for staying out late.
[08:12] ---
    W-Well, anyway, I apologize
    for causing you worry.
[08:15] ---
    Huh? I wasn't worried.
[08:17] ---
    What?
[08:18] ---
    Uh, um, for a girl to go out drinking
    and come home in the morning is...
[08:22] ---
    Looks like I'll be getting
    a peaceful night's sleep tonight!
[08:30] ---
    Thank you for the meal.
[08:33] ---
    Wait, Saki, are you always
    this grumpy at mealtime?
[08:37] ---
    I was born grumpy.
[08:39] ---
    Oh, my, what a thing to say!
[08:41] ---
    Honestly!
[08:42] ---
    I'm coming back in the morning
    after going drinking
[08:44] ---
    and he's not worried at all?!
[08:46] ---
    Well, as you can see, nothing happens.
[08:52] ---
    Well, then, I am going back!
[08:54] ---
    Wait, Saki! Hold on!
[08:56] ---
    What is it?!
[08:57] ---
    Um, so Saki dear, do you have any
    interest in match-making meetings?
[09:00] ---
    Huh?
[09:02] ---
    Incidentally, this kit does
    not come with a figurine!
[09:05] ---
    However! It comes with Char's
    custom Gelgoog and 10 bits.
[09:06] ---
    Mention a match-making meeting
    in that situation and anyone would have...
[09:08] ---
    Incidentally, the scale is 1:550!
[09:12] ---
    Um, am I boring you
    with my Gundam model talk?
[09:15] ---
    Oh, I-I'm sorry. I was just
    thinking about something...
[09:19] ---
    No, I can tell by the glum
    look on your face.
[09:22] ---
    Oh, um...
[09:23] ---
    I'm 28 already and my parents
    are really getting on my case.
[09:26] ---
    What?
[09:27] ---
    They keep telling me to get married.
[09:29] ---
    So I reluctantly wound up coming
    to this match-making meeting...
[09:32] ---
    Oh, um, me, too.
[09:34] ---
    What?
[09:35] ---
    I was sort of forced into it
    and got carried away.
[09:37] ---
    I-I am sorry!
[09:39] ---
    Oh, no, I'm no better than you!
    M-More importantly...
[09:42] ---
    What?
[09:43] ---
    Where are we?
[09:49] ---
    This is...!
[09:53] ---
    Where in the world could they be?
[09:56] ---
    This place looks like there
    really could be wild animals here.
[09:59] ---
    Please do not worry! I shall
    protect you at the risk of my own life!
[10:04] ---
    Darn it! Which way could they be?!
[10:07] ---
    But Wataru, don't you care about Isumi?
[10:10] ---
    Wha?!
[10:13] ---
    Oh, my...
[10:15] ---
    Huh?! What's Isumi got to do
    with any of this?!
[10:18] ---
    Good point.
[10:19] ---
    In a typical romance, the pattern goes...
[10:21] ---
    If ya drag yer feet, unable to confess
    yer feelings to yer sweetheart,
[10:24] ---
    yer sweetheart starts gettin' offers
    for match-makin' meetings and stuff.
[10:27] ---
    It's not like that!
[10:29] ---
    Then just leave Saki alone.
[10:32] ---
    She's of age, so she's got
    a right to find happiness.
[10:36] ---
    Th-That's true, but...
[10:37] ---
    Ya don't make any sense.
[10:39] ---
    Well, not that it matters.
[10:40] ---
    It's already weird, since I'm your
    betrothed and I'm helping you here.
[10:44] ---
    Then, fine! I don't need any more help!
[10:46] ---
    Oh, there she is! Saki!
[10:48] ---
    What?!
[10:52] ---
    Where could we be?
[10:53] ---
    I have no idea.
[10:55] ---
    Do you suppose that's the way back?
[10:57] ---
    Who the heck is that?
    I've seen him somewhere before.
[11:00] ---
    Oh, that's Mr. Kaoru!
[11:02] ---
    Oh, that Gundam model freak!
[11:04] ---
    I can't hear them, but they
    seem like they're hitting it off.
[11:08] ---
    They certainly do.
[11:09] ---
    Damn it! That Saki!
[11:11] ---
    Don't tell me she's serious
    about a guy like him?!
[11:13] ---
    If only we could hear them somehow...
[11:16] ---
    I'll bet even the all-purpose butler
    can't do anythin' about this.
[11:19] ---
    Please leave it to me!
[11:20] ---
    What?!
[11:21] ---
    Please leave it to me, Miss!
[11:23] ---
    I thought such a need might arise,
    so I learned lip-reading with the SPK
[11:26] ---
    and I will use it
    to read their conversation!
[11:33] ---
    The truth is, um,
    there's someone I care for.
[11:36] ---
    What?
[11:37] ---
    "The truth is, Saki,
    you are the person I care for!"
[11:40] ---
    What?!
[11:41] ---
    O-Oh, someone you care for?
[11:44] ---
    Yes.
[11:45] ---
    "O-Oh, I also care for you!"
[11:48] ---
    So, who is this person you like?
[11:50] ---
    She's a childhood friend.
[11:52] ---
    She used to be really cute
    way back when, but...
SIGN    Yukiji
[11:55] ---
    This is ultimately the subjective
    vision of a man in love.
[11:59] ---
    As she grew older, she became more
    of a mess in terms of her personality.
[12:01] ---
    Actually, she was a mess to begin with...
[12:04] ---
    "So, what is it that you like?"
[12:05] ---
    "What I like about you is that you'd
    make a child wife and how you're cute."
[12:08] ---
    "I just want to mess you up.
    Actually, I want to mess you up big time!"
[12:11] ---
    But you still like her?
[12:13] ---
    "Th-Then do as you like with me!"
[12:18] ---
    I don't know what she thinks of me,
[12:20] ---
    but how you feel is something
    that's hard to change, you know?
[12:23] ---
    That's true.
[12:24] ---
    How you feel is...
[12:26] ---
    "I'm more of a skilled operator
    than you'd think,"
[12:28] ---
    "and I'll change things so it feels good!"
[12:29] ---
    "That's great! As long as it feels good!"
[12:31] ---
    I can't put up with this anymore! Saki!
[12:33] ---
    Ya moron!
[12:35] ---
    Ya jump out there without a plan
    and she'll just end up hatin' ya!
[12:39] ---
    Yes, she has a point.
[12:40] ---
    Th-Then what am I supposed to do?!
[12:42] ---
    How 'bout ya knock her out
    with a whack with this from behind.
[12:48] ---
    I-I don't know about that.
[12:50] ---
    As a globally standard method,
[12:53] ---
    how about creating a critical situation
[12:54] ---
    and once you've highlighted
    her partner's worthlessness,
[12:57] ---
    you go out there and resolve things?
[13:00] ---
    Th-That's my Hayate! That's good!
[13:02] ---
    Oh, please...
[13:03] ---
    That's too much of a cliché, right?
[13:05] ---
    This is the Heisei era, not Showa.
[13:08] ---
    Even Wataru won't go for a plan like...
[13:10] ---
    You're amazing that you can come up
    with a plan like that, Hayate!
[13:12] ---
    Right?! My butler is a genius!
[13:15] ---
    Yeah, he's a genius!
[13:16] ---
    Oh, please...
[13:18] ---
    Wataru probably doesn't watch
    cliché dramas of this sort, so...
[13:22] ---
    But assumin' we use this
    totally cliché method,
[13:25] ---
    how're we gonna create
    the critical situation?
[13:27] ---
    We're going to use Tama.
[13:29] ---
    Tama?
[13:30] ---
    Rarr.
[13:31] ---
    What's he doing here?
[13:32] ---
    He heard Maria talking to herself
    and couldn't resist coming.
[13:36] ---
    Rarr...
[13:39] ---
    So, I end up staying alone at home again.
[13:42] ---
    Well, I'll just sing
    to my heart's content then!
[13:53] ---
    Let us stop the...
[13:56] ---
    More Kinoppi than Kaakun.
    (Kaakun yori Kinoppi.)
[14:00] ---
    Do you like century eggs?
    (Piitan osuki desuka?)
[14:11] ---
    I suppose I'll get some cleaning done.
[14:13] ---
    That actually made me feel more lonely.
[14:19] ---
    Well, that's what's going on,
[14:21] ---
    so you leap out of the bushes
    and scare them a little.
[14:24] ---
    I don't mind doing that,
    but what do I get out of it?
[14:27] ---
    Let me think...
[14:29] ---
    If you don't do as I say,
[14:30] ---
    how about I reveal
    that you're a talking tiger
[14:32] ---
    and sell you off to the circus?
[14:34] ---
    A-All right already! Damn it!
[14:37] ---
    I believe I have Tama's
    cooperation now as well.
[14:39] ---
    Ya can communicate with tigers?
[14:42] ---
    Yes, in a way...
[14:43] ---
    That's my butler!
[14:45] ---
    Yeah!
[14:47] ---
    Sheesh! That Hayate!
[14:49] ---
    He looks so sweet, but
    the things he says are nasty. Man!
[14:56] ---
    Right then, Tama became aware
    of a terrifying menacing aura!
[14:59] ---
    Wh-What's this aura?
[15:03] ---
    They say animals instinctively
    known when approached
[15:05] ---
    by a beast that's stronger than them, but...
[15:08] ---
    So, my instincts still hadn't
    forgotten how to do that!
[15:13] ---
    Th-This vicious beast's aura...
[15:16] ---
    I-I can't move...
[15:22] ---
    I must apologize.
[15:23] ---
    Not only did I make you come
    to this match-making meeting,
[15:25] ---
    but you also had to listen to me
    selfishly talk about my life.
[15:29] ---
    Not at all.
[15:30] ---
    She's selfish and capricious,
    and she gets offended easily,
[15:35] ---
    but they tend to be the ones
    that are the hardest to ignore...
[15:39] ---
    Selfish and capricious, and easily offended?
[15:47] ---
    The truth is...
[15:48] ---
    Huh?
[15:49] ---
    Um, there's someone
    I find hard to ignore, too.
[15:55] ---
    I'm envious.
[15:56] ---
    What?
[15:57] ---
    Of that person who has your affections.
[16:11] ---
    Mr. Kaoru!
[16:12] ---
    Ooh! That was superbly agile for Tama!
[16:15] ---
    Now's yer chance, Wataru! Get goin' already!
[16:17] ---
    R-Right!
[16:19] ---
    Saki!
[16:21] ---
    You okay, Saki?!
[16:21] ---
    Young Sir! What are you doing here?
[16:24] ---
    Oh, no, uh... What am I...?
[16:27] ---
    Never mind that, we have to run!
[16:28] ---
    But we can't leave Mr. Kaoru behind!
[16:31] ---
    Leave it to me! I'll save him!
[16:39] ---
    That's good, that's good!
[16:40] ---
    This is getting to be quite
    an exciting turn of events!
[16:42] ---
    Yeah! I guess clichés
    can be good sometimes.
[16:46] ---
    Well, I was going to attack those guys,
[16:49] ---
    but I sensed the aura
    of this terrible beast,
[16:51] ---
    so I thought it was dicey and I came back.
[16:53] ---
    What?!
[16:55] ---
    What's wrong, Hayate?
[16:56] ---
    Um, it appears that beast
    we saw wasn't Tama...
[17:01] ---
    What?!
[17:02] ---
    Th-Then what's over there?
[17:04] ---
    It may be a real wild animal...
[17:07] ---
    What?!
[17:09] ---
    Young Sir, it is dangerous!
[17:11] ---
    Saki, you run!
[17:12] ---
    Young Sir!
[17:13] ---
    Come on out, beast! Let Mr. Kaoru go!
[17:15] ---
    Or I'll destroy you!
[17:18] ---
    Wataru,
[17:19] ---
    the thing in there isn't Tama,
    but a real wild animal.
[17:24] ---
    Take that! And that! And that! And that!
[17:25] ---
    Stop that, you idiot!
[17:30] ---
    Young Sir!
[17:32] ---
    Voltes Kick!
[17:34] ---
    Young Sir!
[17:38] ---
    Saki!
[17:41] ---
    Miss Katsura?!
[17:42] ---
    Y-Yukiji, what the heck are you doing here?
[17:46] ---
    I was told I could drink all I want
    at the match-making party,
[17:48] ---
    so I'd been drinking since yesterday,
[17:49] ---
    but they told me to knock it off
    and kicked me out!
[17:52] ---
    I got lost in the woods
[17:53] ---
    and I'm hungry and I'm on edge here!
[17:53] ---
    It's only natural
    that she'd get kicked out...
[17:55] ---
    I haven't had nearly enough to drink!
[17:55] ---
    I agree...
[17:57] ---
    For starters, we're going to Kabukicho
    and get back to drinking!
[18:00] ---
    You're treating!
[18:01] ---
    Help me! I'm going home!
[18:05] ---
    Did you come out of concern
    for my match-making meeting?
[18:08] ---
    Th-Things are busy at the shop.
[18:11] ---
    There's no time for match-making
    meetings. We're going home!
[18:13] ---
    Come on!
[18:22] ---
    You are right.
[18:24] ---
    I will not be able to get married
    for a while at the rate things are going.
[18:27] ---
    D-Damn straight! You dummy!
[18:38] ---
    Good grief. He's like a little brother
    who needs a lot of looking-after.
[18:42] ---
    Agreed.
[18:43] ---
    But does Wataru like Isumi?
    Or does he like Saki?
[18:48] ---
    What's up with him?
[18:50] ---
    Well, with boys,
    there are all kinds of "likes".
[18:56] ---
    I don't really understand,
[18:57] ---
    but boys are more
    complicated than I thought.
[19:00] ---
    Yes.
[19:01] ---
    This doesn't really matter,
    but was your lip-reading accurate?
[19:05] ---
    Actually, I'm pretty
    confident of my abilities.
[19:09] ---
    After a storm, relationships strengthen.
[19:11] ---
    Well, not that we care
    about the happiness of others.
[19:14] ---
    More importantly, next time,
    they'll be fighting against suspense!
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
[19:22] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, huh?
[19:24] ---
    That boy has quite a lot of potential.
SIGN    Hakuou Academy Superintendent
    Kirika Kuzuha
[19:35] ---
    That boy...
[19:37] ---
    Make him wear outfits like this or that...
[19:40] ---
    And put cat-ears on him...
[19:44] ---
    Honestly! Mistress Kuzuha!
SIGN    Superintendent's Personal Butler
    Sion Kuresato
[19:47] ---
    What's so great about a guy like him anyway?
[19:50] ---
    Sion, do not be so jealous.
[19:53] ---
    You, too, wish to make
    Ayasaki weep, do you not?
[19:57] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha!
[19:59] ---
    So, um, how long do I have to wait?
[20:03] ---
    I know.
[20:04] ---
    Mysterious Butler of Darkness No. 1,
[20:07] ---
    defeat Hayate Ayasaki
    and make him one of us!
[20:11] ---
    Yes, my lady!
[20:15] ---
    Here you are, Mistress Kuzuha.
[20:21] ---
    He will come to realize just how
    frightful my assassin can be...
[20:28] ---
    Another peaceful day.
[20:32] ---
    My turn!
[20:34] ---
    Wh-Who are you?!
[20:42] ---
    My name is Duel Butler!
[20:44] ---
    My turn! Draw!
[20:47] ---
    Wh-What the?!
[20:49] ---
    Wh-What is this?!
[20:53] ---
    Huh? What's this?
[20:54] ---
    Now, fight me, Hayate Ayasaki!
[20:56] ---
    I don't really understand, but here I go!
[21:00] ---
    My turn! Draw! Magic card!
[21:03] ---
    Summon White-Haired Demon Klaus and attack!
SIGN    Klaus
[21:12] ---
    But even when crushed,
    they come back to life!
[21:13] ---
    That vitality is
    the true strength of my deck!
[21:16] ---
    Activate the Shield Trigger!
[21:18] ---
    Not so fast!
[21:20] ---
    Drawing yet again!
[21:20] ---
    I'll finish you off with
    the rare Hayate Ayasaki card!
[21:25] ---
    Here we go, partner!
[21:26] ---
    Okay, my alter ego!
[21:32] ---
    Wha?!
[21:34] ---
    Me?! Killed in one turn?!
[21:42] ---
    Huh? What the...
[21:44] ---
    Damn it all! Just you remember this!
[21:46] ---
    What in the world was that?
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
     The End
[21:49] ---
    "This Week's"?!
[21:50] ---
    Don't tell me this is going
    to keep happening?!
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:04] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:22] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:27] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:33] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:44] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:50] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:56] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:57] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:01] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:06] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:14] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:31] ---
    Summoned, I pop out, I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I'm Maria.
[23:35] ---
    Oh? What are you doing here, Maria?
[23:38] ---
    When the story takes place
    outside the Sanzenin estate,
[23:40] ---
    I tend to have few scenes,
    so it seems I get to do this instead.
[23:43] ---
    I see, that's an alarming situation.
[23:45] ---
    But the majority of this show's viewers
[23:47] ---
    must be watching mainly to see me,
    so there should be no problem.
[23:49] ---
    What? Do you think so?
[23:51] ---
    I'd like to see more scenes
    with Maria in them.
[23:53] ---
    Oh, Hayate!
[23:54] ---
    See you later!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:59] ---
    Sh-She's dead?!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    I confess, I already have
    a good idea of who the culprit is.
[24:03] ---
    What?!
[24:04] ---
    She sees through to the one and only truth.
[24:06] ---
    With the looks of a snooty softy
    and the brains of a societal bum.
[24:07] ---
    Her name is Great Detective Nagi!
[24:09] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:10] ---
    "The Beautiful Rich Great
    Young Detective Lady Saw It!
[24:13] ---
    "The Case of the Murdered Female
    Teacher Amidst Clouds of Steam".
[24:14] ---
    It will be full of fan
    service scenes as well.
[24:16] ---
    I hope you enjoy it with your entire family.
[24:18] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
[24:18] ---
    The Beautiful Rich Great Young Detective Lady Saw It!
    The Case of the Murdered Female Teacher Amidst Clouds of Steam
[24:19] ---
    Did you know?
[24:20] ---
    Looking at a cast list in the newspaper,
[24:21] ---
    the 3rd or the 5th on the list
    is the most likely to be culprit.

30 - The Beautiful Rich Great Young Detective Lady Saw It! The Case of the Murdered Female Teacher Amidst Clouds of Steam

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:15] ---
    Sh-She's dead?!
[00:17] ---
    I confess, I already have
    a good idea of who the culprit is.
[00:21] ---
    What?!
[00:22] ---
    This is one of those
    so-called "dying messages".
[00:25] ---
    I'd say you're wrong there...
[00:28] ---
    Who's there?!
[00:33] ---
    It can't be! You're the culprit?!
SIGN    Sunday Suspense
SIGN    The Beautiful Rich Great
    Young Detective Lady Saw It!
SIGN    The Case of the Murdered Female
    Teacher Amidst Clouds of Steam!
SIGN    As a mysterious beauty smiled bewitchingly in a steamy open-air mixed bath,
     it was a night in a ravine quiet of the passion of man and woman,
    that a monkey ran off uttering a death cry and wept softly
     at the far ends of love and sorrow.
SIGN    In Cooperation With
    Boonies Hot Springs Tourist Association
[00:46] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[00:50] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[00:55] ---
    This episode of "Hayate"
    is very suspenseful!
[00:57] ---
    But as always, please enjoy it
    with your whole family.
[01:02] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:05] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:07] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:13] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[01:18] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[01:24] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[01:29] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[01:35] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[01:40] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[01:45] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[01:51] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[01:56] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[01:59] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:02] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:07] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:10] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:13] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[02:31] ---
    The Beautiful Rich Great Young Detective Lady Saw It! The Case of the Murdered Female Teacher Amidst Clouds of Steam
SIGN    Beautiful Rich Great Young Detective Lady
    Nagi Sanzenin
[02:39] ---
    The autumn breeze truly is quite pleasant.
[02:41] ---
    I agree, Miss.
SIGN    Assistant and Butler
    Hayate Ayasaki
[02:43] ---
    And the autumn leaves are very beautiful.
[02:46] ---
    Aren't you glad we took the plunge
    and came for a trip to the hot springs?
SIGN    Assistant and Maid
    Maria
[02:48] ---
    Yeah, definitely!
[02:51] ---
    By the way, Miss, where
    is the inn we're going to stay at?
[02:54] ---
    That's it!
[02:56] ---
    Th-That's the one?!
[02:58] ---
    Oh, my! How very classic!
[03:00] ---
    The only way to enjoy hot springs
    is to relax quietly at a rustic inn!
[03:04] ---
    But it seems to be giving off
    a rather ominous aura...
[03:07] ---
    What?
[03:07] ---
    There's a very "untouchable"
    atmosphere about it...
[03:13] ---
    We just heard a scream come
    from that inn, didn't we?!
[03:15] ---
    Yes!
[03:20] ---
    What is the matter, ma'am?
SIGN    Waitresses
    The Student Council Girl Trio
SIGN    Guest in the Next Room
    Shiori Makimura
[03:24] ---
    What happened?!
SIGN    And Her Lover
    Eight
SIGN    Corpse
    Yukiji Katsura
[03:30] ---
    Um, this is different than before.
[03:32] ---
    Shut up! I'd never get married
    if I stayed looking like that!
[03:38] ---
    I smell a case.
[03:39] ---
    You're the one who did it.
[03:41] ---
    Hmm, I never expected to get caught up
    in a murder case at the hot springs.
[03:45] ---
    What a delightful... I mean,
    what a troubling situation this is.
[03:49] ---
    For starters, we must contact the police!
[03:51] ---
    Y-Yeah, you're right.
[03:53] ---
    This is terrible! This is terrible!
[03:55] ---
    No need for that!
[03:57] ---
    She sees through to the one and only truth.
[03:59] ---
    With the looks of a snooty softy
    and the brains of a societal bum.
[04:02] ---
    Her name is Great Detective Nagi!
[04:06] ---
    The kiddy backpack doesn't
    look out of place one bit.
[04:09] ---
    That's not the jab you should be making!
[04:12] ---
    Sis!
SIGN    The Corpse's Little Sister
    Hinagiku Katsura
[04:15] ---
    I always thought you
    were a no-good big sister,
[04:17] ---
    but I never imagined you'd end up like this!
[04:20] ---
    You have my sympathies,
    but please try to remain calm.
[04:23] ---
    Yes, I know.
[04:24] ---
    There's actually something
    I'd like for you all to see.
[04:27] ---
    What?
[04:29] ---
    A video...tape?
[04:31] ---
    Yes.
[04:32] ---
    I just received it
    earlier by bike messenger.
[04:35] ---
    I suspect it was taped by my sister.
[04:37] ---
    What?!
SIGN    First of Spring
[04:42] ---
    I wonder if it's recording properly...
[04:45] ---
    That's this room, right?
[04:46] ---
    Yes, it appears to be.
[04:48] ---
    Hina, by the time you see this,
[04:51] ---
    your big sis may already be
    one of the stars in the sky.
[04:56] ---
    They put it well when they
    said "beauty dies first".
[04:59] ---
    Where does she get off saying that?
[05:01] ---
    Um, never mind that.
    The background scenery...
[05:03] ---
    The truth is,
[05:05] ---
    I was asked to come to this inn
    by a letter from an unknown sender.
[05:10] ---
    It seems this person
    has a grudge against me.
[05:14] ---
    But I don't know who it is yet.
[05:17] ---
    I think they'll be visiting me
    here in this room soon, but...
[05:22] ---
    I don't really care anymore.
[05:24] ---
    Hina, I want you to know,
    if I should end up dead,
[05:27] ---
    my killer will be the person
    who shows up after this!
[05:30] ---
    Make sure you catch the person
[05:32] ---
    and sue them for plenty of damages! Got it?!
[05:36] ---
    It's coming!
[05:38] ---
    What?!
[05:39] ---
    This is where it ends?!
[05:41] ---
    No way! It got cut off
    at the most crucial part!
[05:43] ---
    This is awful!
[05:44] ---
    It's almost as awful
    as a mother who tricks her child
[05:45] ---
    by putting honey on cucumber
    and says, "Here's some melon!"
[05:48] ---
    No, as awful as saying soy
    sauce on pudding is sea urchin!
[05:51] ---
    No, no!
[05:52] ---
    It's as awful as putting dried seaweed
    and soy sauce on mandarin oranges
[05:52] ---
    I see.
[05:54] ---
    and calling it salmon roe!
[05:54] ---
    After killing the victim,
[05:56] ---
    the culprit probably erased the part
    that revealed who the murderer is
[05:59] ---
    and then sent the tape.
[06:01] ---
    In other words, this is a challenge
    issued by the culprit to me!
[06:07] ---
    I confess, I already have
    a good idea of who the culprit is!
[06:11] ---
    What?!
[06:12] ---
    Is this true?!
[06:13] ---
    Yes! The culprit is...
[06:15] ---
    The culprit is?
[06:16] ---
    None other than you!
[06:18] ---
    What?! Me?!
[06:19] ---
    But I'm just the guest
    in the room next door!
[06:22] ---
    But she's a super low-key character,
[06:24] ---
    who's never appeared since Episode 23...
[06:27] ---
    I appeared in Episode 25, too!
[06:27] ---
    I've even seen through the trick,
    right slick and lickety-split!
SIGN    Trick #1
[06:33] ---
    You summoned the victim to a meeting.
[06:35] ---
    Don't come any closer!
[06:37] ---
    You just try laying a hand on me
[06:39] ---
    and I'll make you pay all the bar tabs
    that I've accumulated!
SIGN    Bills
[06:47] ---
    What?!
[06:48] ---
    And using a speckled snake
    that just happened to be passing by...
[06:51] ---
    Snaaaaake...
[06:54] ---
    There you have it.
[06:56] ---
    How about it? Perfect
    detective work, right?!
[06:58] ---
    You ask how it was, but...
[06:59] ---
    Not to mention, you totally borrowed
    the most famous trick in the universe.
[07:03] ---
    Apologize to Sir Doyle.
[07:06] ---
    Caught in the act! You're under arrest!
[07:07] ---
    What?! You're wrong! I'm not the one!
[07:10] ---
    Do not argue with me! Give it up!
[07:12] ---
    Nooo!
[07:13] ---
    Grab!
[07:15] ---
    Don't treat my honey like she's a criminal!
[07:19] ---
    Watch out, Miss!
[07:29] ---
    That's my Hayate!
[07:30] ---
    Miss, it appears the culprit
    is someone else.
[07:33] ---
    Yes, to be honest,
    I had a feeling that it might be.
[07:37] ---
    I see...
[07:38] ---
    Which makes you three the suspicious ones!
SIGN    Trick #2
[07:45] ---
    Wh-Where in the world am I?
[07:47] ---
    You three summoned the victim to a meeting
[07:50] ---
    and using a giant speckled octopus
    that just happened to be passing by...
[07:52] ---
    Oooooctopus...
[07:55] ---
    There you have it.
[07:56] ---
    What's this giant speckled octopus about?!
[07:59] ---
    More like, we weren't even in the scene!
[08:00] ---
    Now, allow yourselves
    to be arrested without resisting!
[08:03] ---
    There are others more likely
    to have motives, aren't there?!
[08:05] ---
    What?
[08:06] ---
    Oh, a motive...
[08:08] ---
    Yes, you have a point there.
[08:10] ---
    The person who might have the biggest
    grudge against the victim would be...
[08:13] ---
    It'd have to be none other
    than the butler-in-debt.
[08:16] ---
    What?!
[08:17] ---
    H-Hold on a second! What are you saying?!
[08:20] ---
    Stare...
[08:21] ---
    Please don't all of you look at me
    with such suspicion, too!
[08:24] ---
    And of all the people,
    I trusted you the most, too.
[08:26] ---
    As I said, I am not the one!
SIGN    Trick #3
[08:29] ---
    I told you, it's not me!
[08:32] ---
    With the speckled elephant
    that just happened to be passing by...
[08:34] ---
    Eeeelephant...
[08:37] ---
    You look like you wouldn't
    hurt a fly and yet...
[08:40] ---
    Miss, your deductions are nonsense
    based on hunches and inspiration!
[08:41] ---
    Oh, Mr. Yama? I've caught the perp.
[08:44] ---
    Besides, the scene has
    switched somewhere along the way
[08:44] ---
    This solves the case, but it won't
    bring the victim back to life.
[08:46] ---
    from a hot springs inn to Africa!
[08:48] ---
    Wait, who the heck are you talking to?!
[08:48] ---
    I guess we'll talk again on the
    rooftop, gazing at the sunset.
[08:51] ---
    HEY!
[08:53] ---
    How many times do you have to kill me
    before you're satisfied?!
[08:55] ---
    The story's not making any progress here!
[08:58] ---
    It's really embarrassing to be lying
    here dressed like this, you know!
[09:01] ---
    Hinagiku!
[09:02] ---
    Uh, yes, ma'am!
[09:02] ---
    I expect you to do things
    properly, as scripted!
[09:04] ---
    Yes, ma'am.
[09:06] ---
    Plop.
[09:10] ---
    Oh, what could that be?
SIGN    Hibiya
[09:14] ---
    Oh, that's a so-called dying message!
[09:17] ---
    What's a "dying message"?
[09:19] ---
    You don't even know that?
[09:21] ---
    Allow me to explain.
[09:23] ---
    A dying message is a hint
    that the victim leaves conspicuously
[09:28] ---
    right before death.
SIGN    Cheney
SIGN    Hibiya
[09:31] ---
    I see.
[09:32] ---
    But "Hibiya"...?
[09:34] ---
    Allow me to explain some more.
[09:35] ---
    Hibiya refers to an area close to Ginza,
[09:38] ---
    which includes Yurakucho,
    which is in Chiyoda Ward, Tokyo.
[09:40] ---
    Incidentally, this is also where Japan's
    first electric traffic signal was set up.
[09:46] ---
    We don't need such in-depth information.
[09:47] ---
    Anyway, if we can decipher
    the meaning of this message,
[09:50] ---
    we'll know who the culprit is, right?
[09:52] ---
    It's suddenly becoming more
    like a serious mystery now!
[09:55] ---
    Yeah!
[09:55] ---
    But this is very difficult.
[09:58] ---
    Difficult?
[10:00] ---
    No, this is not even close.
[10:03] ---
    This is nothing compared
    to the secrets of the pyramids and UFOs!
[10:07] ---
    What?!
[10:09] ---
    Uh, I don't know about this different
    character with the glasses...
[10:12] ---
    That's exactly right!
[10:13] ---
    What?!
[10:14] ---
    That's my Hayate!
[10:16] ---
    You have a good instinct.
    Just what I'd expect of my assistant!
[10:18] ---
    Y-You think so?
[10:20] ---
    Indeed. This crime was perpetrated
    by a different character,
[10:22] ---
    who is currently not here.
[10:24] ---
    What?!
[10:25] ---
    A different character?
[10:26] ---
    That's right.
[10:27] ---
    After murdering the victim,
[10:29] ---
    the culprit ought to be
    hiding somewhere else now!
[10:32] ---
    And where in the world is that?
[10:33] ---
    Don't tell me you're
    going to say it's Hibiya.
[10:37] ---
    Take another close look at that.
[10:39] ---
    What?
SIGN    Hibiya
[10:41] ---
    No matter how you look
    at it, it says "Hibiya".
[10:43] ---
    Wrong.
[10:44] ---
    This message includes
    the kaki-no-tane crackers next to it, too!
[10:48] ---
    What?!
[10:49] ---
    Listen closely. What's written
    there are the radicals on the right.
[10:52] ---
    If you assume the crackers
    are the radicals...
SIGN    "Mixed Bath"
[10:57] ---
    Surprise! It reads "mixed bath"!
[11:00] ---
    Amazing, huh?
[11:01] ---
    What a deduction out of left field...
[11:03] ---
    Furthermore, this inn actually
    conveniently has a mixed bath.
[11:07] ---
    What?!
[11:12] ---
    The culprit is certain to be here!
[11:13] ---
    S-Surely not... No matter how you look at it,
    there's no way that's true.
[11:19] ---
    There he is!
[11:21] ---
    And just who might the culprit be?
[11:23] ---
    To be continued in the second half.
[11:27] ---
    Your valuables! Quick!
    (Kaneme no mono o! Hayaku!)
[11:31] ---
    Did you pay the ward tax?
    (Kuminzei haratta?)
[11:34] ---
    The Flunking Girl Trio's
SIGN    The Flunking Girl Trio Gluttony
SIGN    Like a Dream
[11:36] ---
    Gluttony, Like a Dream!
[11:40] ---
    You know.
[11:41] ---
    What?
[11:42] ---
    Is this eating or a hot springs fan
    service scene? Can we clarify that?
[11:45] ---
    What?!
[11:46] ---
    The effects of this hot spring are...
[11:49] ---
    Rissy, that's after we eat! After we eat!
[11:51] ---
    This is a merry-go-round of tastiness!
[11:54] ---
    We haven't eaten yet! Not yet!
[11:56] ---
    Gilgamesh.
[11:57] ---
    That's not right!
[11:58] ---
    Granny, isn't this delicious?
[12:04] ---
    Who's there?!
[12:06] ---
    Now, don't you say that the art is different
    from the previous scene.
[12:14] ---
    M-Maria, when
    in the world did you get in here?!
[12:16] ---
    Wait, so you're the culprit?!
[12:19] ---
    No, I'm not!
[12:20] ---
    Then, why?!
[12:21] ---
    Now, now, don't sweat the details.
[12:24] ---
    A sexy scene is a cliché
    of suspense drama, right?
[12:27] ---
    What?!
[12:29] ---
    She is using a towel for this shoot,
[12:31] ---
    but when you are actually bathing,
    please refrain from using them in the water.
[12:35] ---
    Oh, really!
[12:37] ---
    Now, let's ride this momentum
    and go for Cliché #2!
[12:41] ---
    A gourmet scene!
[12:43] ---
    Now, please enjoy!
[12:44] ---
    Have your fill of this
    fresh bounty from the sea!
[12:48] ---
    We have prepared a magic show
    for you after the Japanese ballad show.
[12:51] ---
    One bottle of gasoline,
    warmed to body temperature.
[12:57] ---
    Yum.
[12:58] ---
    And Cliché #3!
SIGN    Bar Dead End
[13:00] ---
    Interviewing people
    at a bar on the outskirts of town!
SIGN    Bar Mistress Klaus
[13:06] ---
    So, what do you want?
[13:08] ---
    Do you know anything about this person?
[13:11] ---
    Do I know anything?
[13:12] ---
    Hah! Do I ever!
[13:15] ---
    That woman is my long separated
    elder sister's friend's cousin
[13:19] ---
    and she's the thieving bitch,
    who stole my lover!
[13:23] ---
    I feel like this has become more like
    a daytime drama instead of suspense.
[13:23] ---
    Damn you, you she-pig!
    I'll turn you into cutlets and eat you!
[13:27] ---
    Cliché #4.
[13:30] ---
    I'm not done yet!
[13:32] ---
    Yay! We did it!
[13:33] ---
    Makimura and Izumi have the advantage!
[13:36] ---
    Yes, this is building up in a nice way!
[13:39] ---
    No, no, this is just getting tedious.
[13:41] ---
    It's terrible!
[13:43] ---
    Wait, Maria, could it be that you've
    been in the hot spring this whole time?!
[13:47] ---
    Yes!
[13:48] ---
    Oh, and so, I went back to our room
    and I discovered something terrible!
[13:52] ---
    What?!
[13:53] ---
    What is it, Maria?!
    Quit dragging it out and tell us!
[13:56] ---
    The body has disappeared!
[13:58] ---
    What?!
[14:00] ---
    I-It's true!
[14:01] ---
    She's gone.
[14:03] ---
    A body going missing
    is as suspenseful as suspense gets!
[14:06] ---
    This is bad. The case
    is 5 seconds away from going cold!
[14:09] ---
    But I wonder who hid it.
[14:11] ---
    It's got to be the culprit, of course!
[14:13] ---
    The culprit?
[14:14] ---
    Yes,
[14:15] ---
    he thinks he's interfering
    with my investigation by stirring things up!
[14:19] ---
    All right, since it's come to this...
[14:24] ---
    Wh-What is this all of a sudden?!
[14:26] ---
    These guys should be able to
    find some kind of definitive clue.
[14:29] ---
    And so, we've spotted this
    on the underside of the table.
[14:32] ---
    Th-This is...?!
[14:34] ---
    It appears to be a voice recorder.
[14:36] ---
    Let me see that!
[14:40] ---
    So, the scream we heard was this?
[14:44] ---
    So it seems...
[14:45] ---
    But why? What does this mean?
[14:57] ---
    I got it!
[14:59] ---
    The mystery is solved, my dear Watson.
[15:01] ---
    "M-My dear Watson"?
[15:05] ---
    Next Nagi's hint.
[15:09] ---
    Now, do you know the culprit and the trick?
[15:16] ---
    Uh, um...
[15:18] ---
    Give me candy!
[15:20] ---
    Oh, no, wrong. Trick or treat!
[15:22] ---
    Huh?
[15:23] ---
    Trick or treat!
[15:28] ---
    Huh?! W-Wait!
[15:29] ---
    Give me candy! Trick or treat!
[15:33] ---
    It's been really tough
    for Halloween to catch on in Japan...
[15:37] ---
    Wrong kind of trick.
[15:41] ---
    Why have we suddenly come
    to a place like this?
[15:45] ---
    It can't be helped.
[15:46] ---
    Having the climax scene
    on an overhanging cliff
[15:48] ---
    is the biggest suspense dramas cliché.
[15:51] ---
    We just need Eiichiro Funakoshi
    and we'd have it all.
[15:54] ---
    And now, I will explain how
    this incident was perpetrated.
[15:57] ---
    Hey, wait!
[15:58] ---
    This crime was actually not
    perpetrated in that room!
[16:02] ---
    What?!
[16:04] ---
    If you assume that it happened
    at a completely different inn
[16:06] ---
    in a different room, it all makes sense.
[16:09] ---
    What do you mean?
[16:10] ---
    Explain it to us so we can understand.
[16:13] ---
    Roger that.
SIGN    Trick #4
[16:17] ---
    First, the culprit met
    with the victim at some other inn.
[16:24] ---
    And on that occasion,
    the culprit recorded the victim's scream.
[16:26] ---
    After this...
[16:27] ---
    Hey, h-hold on! It'll show, it'll show!
[16:27] ---
    The culprit went to a different inn
    with a similar construction.
[16:29] ---
    In other words, the culprit snuck her body
    into our room at that inn.
[16:29] ---
    Be gentle!
[16:31] ---
    Oh, stop! Be gentle!
[16:33] ---
    And then...
[16:35] ---
    Setting the victim's scream on a timer,
[16:38] ---
    the culprit created the illusion
    that the crime had taken place there!
[16:39] ---
    We just heard a scream come
    from that inn, didn't we?!
[16:41] ---
    Yes!
[16:43] ---
    It was all a plot to create an alibi!
[16:47] ---
    Me! Me, me! I have a question!
[16:50] ---
    What is it?
[16:51] ---
    Where's the proof?
[16:53] ---
    With just the voice recorder,
    it seems a bit forced...
[16:58] ---
    The greatest proof is
    on that videotape we saw first!
[17:01] ---
    What?!
[17:03] ---
    On this tape!
[17:04] ---
    Play!
SIGN    First of Spring
[17:06] ---
    I wonder if it's recording properly...
[17:08] ---
    Stop!
[17:09] ---
    I don't see anything unusual about it...
[17:12] ---
    Don't you notice something
    about the scroll hanging there?
SIGN    First of Spring
SIGN    In Dire Distress
    Here Goes the Afro
SIGN    The Actual Room
[17:20] ---
    Oh, my, it's completely different
    from the one in that room.
[17:24] ---
    Precisely.
[17:25] ---
    The culprit wasn't thorough
[17:26] ---
    and failed to pay attention
    to the difference in the hanging scrolls!
[17:29] ---
    There are also 4 other discrepancies.
[17:32] ---
    Those who find them all
    will have a chance to win...
[17:35] ---
    Now that we've gotten this far,
    you know who the culprit is, right?
[17:39] ---
    Um... um...
[17:41] ---
    Oh! I seem to recall there was
    one person who came late!
[17:44] ---
    Yes! And she brought
    that videotape, didn't she?!
[17:47] ---
    As I recall, she said it came
    by bike messenger or something,
[17:50] ---
    sounding oddly defensive about it...
[17:52] ---
    If she's actually the culprit,
    that just might explain everything!
[17:57] ---
    Which means...!
[17:58] ---
    What?
[17:59] ---
    M-Me?!
[18:02] ---
    Hinagiku, I never imagined
    that you were the culprit.
[18:05] ---
    But it totally makes sense now!
[18:07] ---
    Yes, she is the least
    suspicious of all of us.
[18:10] ---
    Which is exactly what makes her suspicious!
[18:11] ---
    Yup, yup!
[18:17] ---
    That was brilliant detective work!
[18:19] ---
    I never imagined that I'd be caught,
[18:21] ---
    but you're right. Just
    as you said, I'm the culprit.
[18:25] ---
    No, you're wrong!
[18:26] ---
    What?!
[18:27] ---
    The culprit is not Hinagiku.
[18:29] ---
    Hold on! This is supposed to be my scene!
[18:32] ---
    The shock of this has woken me
    from the tranquilizers!
[18:35] ---
    Considering this turn of events,
    I'm the only one who could be the culprit.
[18:38] ---
    But that would be too normal and boring.
[18:41] ---
    Um, it's hard to tell who's talking,
    so would you mind stopping that?
[18:47] ---
    You've all forgotten to begin with!
[18:49] ---
    That there's one more person
    that's incredibly suspicious!
[18:53] ---
    What?!
[18:53] ---
    One more person?
[18:54] ---
    That's right! That person is...!
[18:56] ---
    That person is?!
[19:02] ---
    The person behind the Voice from Heaven!
[19:04] ---
    Me?
[19:06] ---
    M-Miss, isn't that too deus ex machina,
    no matter how you look at it?
[19:10] ---
    This is fine as it is.
[19:11] ---
    But I don't know if our audience
    will be satisfied with that...
[19:15] ---
    This is a suspense story
    starring me and produced by me.
[19:18] ---
    I will permit no one to complain!
[19:21] ---
    Hey!
[19:24] ---
    A huge wave!
[19:26] ---
    Run!
[19:27] ---
    Hold it right there!
[19:29] ---
    Sis?!
[19:30] ---
    That's enough already!
[19:31] ---
    What's the big idea eliminating
    my presence halfway through?!
[19:34] ---
    You're a corpse! Quit coming back
    to life over and over again!
[19:37] ---
    Like hell I can pretend
    to stay dead the whole time!
[19:40] ---
    Darn it! The script I pulled
    an all-nighter to write is ruined!
[19:44] ---
    Since it's come to this,
    I'll fall back to my last resort!
[19:50] ---
    And now, it's fan service time!
[20:11] ---
    The best thing to do in autumn really is
[20:13] ---
    to lounge in a hot spring
    and admire the colored leaves.
[20:16] ---
    Agreed! It's so soothing!
[20:19] ---
    I hope you all have a "Good
    Journey, Like a Dream", too.
[20:25] ---
    This is pure heaven!
[20:27] ---
    Wh-Why is the men's bath this small?!
[20:30] ---
    Huh? Did you say something?
[20:33] ---
    Don't move! It's caught! It's caught!
[20:35] ---
    What's gotten caught?
[20:37] ---
    No! Don't move!
[20:39] ---
    And so, that was the
    "Gluttony, Like a Dream",
[20:42] ---
    the deluxe 20 minute special.
[20:44] ---
    Next time, they will be combating siblings.
[20:48] ---
    Oh, we'd forgotten!
[20:54] ---
    There's no time left!
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
[20:56] ---
    Come forth, Mysterious
    Butler of Darkness No. 2!
[21:02] ---
    Defeat the butler Hayate Ayasaki
    and make him one of us!
[21:07] ---
    Make him one of us!
[21:08] ---
    Go!
[21:13] ---
    B-Fire!
[21:19] ---
    Here goes!
[21:22] ---
    What? This is...?!
[21:24] ---
    B-Fire!
[21:27] ---
    Go! Hayate Blaster!
[21:38] ---
    Just you remember this!
[21:42] ---
    If you're going to fight,
    bring it on, Mysterious Butlers!
[21:45] ---
    Huh? Wait, what am I doing?
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
     The End
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:33] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:06] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Ba-boom! Boing-oing-oing,
    boing-oing-oing! I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I'm everybody's idol, Yukiji Katsura!
[23:36] ---
    What are you doing here, Miss Katsura?
[23:39] ---
    That's cold, Ayasaki. But more importantly!
[23:41] ---
    When in the world is my character
    song going to be finished?!
[23:43] ---
    Hmm, with Miss Katsura,
    I don't think the sales seem that promising.
[23:46] ---
    Agreed.
[23:47] ---
    Pairing up with Tama on a character
    song would probably be about just right.
[23:49] ---
    You've certainly learned
    to speak out, Ayasaki.
[23:52] ---
    Our next guest will be the hamster!
[23:54] ---
    See you!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    So, Miss, you used to
    call Sakuya "Big Sister Saku"?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:02] ---
    A thing of the unpleasant past.
[24:03] ---
    You've never looked after li'l kids,
[24:05] ---
    and that's why ya still haven't
    grown outta bein' a kiddy.
[24:07] ---
    Don't mock me! If I had younger siblings,
[24:10] ---
    I could look after them
    way better than you, Saku!
[24:12] ---
    For real? Then prove it.
[24:14] ---
    Very well!
[24:15] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:17] ---
    "Do You Like Pretty Rich Big Sisters?"
[24:19] ---
    Did you know?
[24:20] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
    Do You Like Pretty Rich Big Sisters?
[24:20] ---
    The first thing the Wright brothers flew
    was the younger brother's mobile.

31 - Do you Like Pretty Rich Big Sisters?

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:10] ---
    Hey, Nagi!
[00:12] ---
    I came to play with ya!
[00:15] ---
    Jump! Jump, Tama!
[00:17] ---
    Meow...
[00:18] ---
    What're ya doin'?
[00:20] ---
    Ah, Saku. As you can see,
    I'm giving Tama exercise.
[00:23] ---
    Exercise?
[00:24] ---
    The truth is, she watched ferocious
    beasts leaping through flaming rings
SIGN    Zaendo Nagi Sanzenin
[00:28] ---
    just earlier on a circus show on TV
[00:30] ---
    and she decided it was
    the perfect exercise for Tama.
[00:32] ---
    That about sums it up.
[00:33] ---
    Now, jump! If a circus cat can do it,
    there's no way you can't!
[00:37] ---
    Meow.
[00:40] ---
    Ya moron!
[00:44] ---
    Why did you suddenly do that?!
[00:46] ---
    There's no way he can jump
    through a tiny ring like that!
[00:48] ---
    Or rather, animal abuse is even more risky
    than mentionin' copyrighted works!
[00:52] ---
    Don't ya know they've gone over 'n
    over it in the writers' meetings?!
[00:55] ---
    Hah! Even if a scriptwriter
    or two get fired,
[00:59] ---
    it's not as if they'll drop
    the main heroine from the show.
SIGN    The Devouring of Dirt Nagi Sanzenin
[01:01] ---
    Um, both of you, such borderline
    conversations are a bit...
[01:06] ---
    Meow.
[01:08] ---
    There, there. Nothin' to be scared of now.
[01:10] ---
    Hey, don't get attached to Saku!
    You're my pet, remember?!
[01:14] ---
    Wow, I didn't know you were so good
    with animals, Sakuya.
[01:18] ---
    Well, it's not just animals, though.
[01:21] ---
    Right, Nagi?
[01:24] ---
    Wh-Why are you saying that to me?!
[01:26] ---
    How true. Nagi used to
    adore Sakuya like a big sister...
[01:31] ---
    Don't, Maria!
[01:32] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[01:36] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[01:42] ---
    Is it one of those so-called
    youthful indiscretions
[01:45] ---
    that you don't want to admit to?
[01:46] ---
    Shut up!
[01:48] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:51] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:53] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:59] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[02:04] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[02:10] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[02:15] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[02:21] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[02:26] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[02:31] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[02:37] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[02:42] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[02:45] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:48] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:53] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:56] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:59] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[03:17] ---
    Do You Like Pretty Rich Big Sisters?
[03:24] ---
    Wow!
[03:25] ---
    So, Miss, you used to call
    Sakuya "Big Sister Saku"?
[03:30] ---
    Humph! A thing of the unpleasant past!
[03:32] ---
    I've got tons of younger siblings,
[03:35] ---
    so I often looked after Nagi along
    with the rest of 'em.
[03:38] ---
    She was so cute.
[03:39] ---
    When she was little, she used to
    want Sakuya's attention all the time...
[03:41] ---
    I told you to stop talking about it!
[03:43] ---
    You've never looked after li'l kids,
[03:48] ---
    and that's why ya still haven't
    grown outta bein' a kiddy.
[03:50] ---
    Don't mock me! If I had younger siblings,
[03:53] ---
    I could look after them
    way better than you, Saku!
[03:56] ---
    For real? Then prove it.
[03:59] ---
    Very well!
[04:00] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[04:01] ---
    Yes?
[04:06] ---
    A-And why do I have to
    dress up like this again?
[04:10] ---
    So cute!
[04:12] ---
    Rejoice! You look really
    good in that, Hayate!
[04:14] ---
    That does not make me happy!
[04:16] ---
    Wait, why do I have to dress like a girl?!
[04:18] ---
    Well, don't sweat the details.
[04:21] ---
    I will look after you now!
[04:23] ---
    Seek my attention all you like!
[04:25] ---
    I see...
[04:26] ---
    But what in the world should I do
    to seek your attention?
[04:28] ---
    Oh, you're so dense!
[04:31] ---
    You know, call me "Dear Sister Nagi"
[04:34] ---
    and you just have to cry and cling to me.
[04:36] ---
    I-I see...
[04:43] ---
    Dear Sister Nagi!
[04:44] ---
    Ah, what's the matter?
[04:47] ---
    Dear Sister!
[04:48] ---
    You...
SIGN    °Conceptual Footage
[04:49] ---
    ...insolent bastard!
[04:54] ---
    Taking advantage of the confusion
    to do something perverted?!
[04:56] ---
    I don't recall raising you
    to be such a naughty child!
[04:59] ---
    Please forgive me, Miss.
    I mean, Dear Sister Nagi...
[05:04] ---
    Well, butler-in-debt?
    Takin' care of Nagi's not easy, right?
[05:09] ---
    This is nothing unusual, though.
[05:10] ---
    I just can't get in the mood
    because you're not a real child!
[05:14] ---
    A real child?
[05:17] ---
    That's right!
[05:18] ---
    This estate has lots of
    out-of-the-way places and jungles
[05:21] ---
    where two or three children
    could have easily strayed into!
[05:23] ---
    Hayate, go find children this instant!
[05:26] ---
    That is easy for you to say, but...
[05:29] ---
    I have things like this
    prepared for you, too...
[05:33] ---
    U-Understood!
[05:37] ---
    She really is such a willful child.
[05:39] ---
    But I wonder what Hayate plans to do...
[05:41] ---
    She asked for real children, but...
[05:43] ---
    Well, if it comes down to it,
    he'll just hafta kidnap 'em from somewhere.
[05:48] ---
    I have brought them!
SIGN    WHAT?!
[05:57] ---
    What's goin' on?! Don't tell me
    ya really kidnapped 'em!
[06:00] ---
    Y-You have the wrong idea!
    Please calm down, Sakuya!
[06:05] ---
    Lost?
[06:07] ---
    Yes, they were wandering around the
    gate, so I took them in for their safety.
[06:11] ---
    They're apparently on vacation
    and became separated from their parents.
[06:13] ---
    It's not like they're Isumi.
    Why'd they stray into a place like this?
[06:18] ---
    At any rate, we should call the police.
[06:22] ---
    Nooo!
[06:24] ---
    Oh, dear. They may not like it, but...
[06:27] ---
    There is nothing to be scared of.
[06:28] ---
    It's not as if he police will
    suddenly attack you with an Ingram.
[06:32] ---
    Take that!
[06:33] ---
    They won't mobilize Special
    Vehicles Section 2 for lost kids!
[06:37] ---
    What does it matter?
[06:39] ---
    Miss?
[06:42] ---
    We just happened to be
    in need of children anyway.
[06:44] ---
    We will look after them for a while.
[06:46] ---
    Ya moron! They're not pets, ya know!
[06:48] ---
    There's no way ya can just...
[06:51] ---
    Thank you, very rich big sister!
[06:53] ---
    Rich big sister!
[06:55] ---
    Ah, you guys are cute. What are your names?
[06:59] ---
    I'm Itsuki!
[07:00] ---
    I'm Shunji!
[07:01] ---
    Nice to meet you, very rich big sister!
[07:04] ---
    Hayate, it seems I have a knack
    for it that makes children like me!
[07:08] ---
    Uh-huh...
[07:12] ---
    But their parents are sure
    to be worried by now.
[07:16] ---
    Oh, that's not a problem.
[07:18] ---
    Summon the SP Unit!
[07:20] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[07:22] ---
    Listen up!
[07:22] ---
    On the honor of the Sanzenin family SP Unit,
[07:25] ---
    find the parents of these
    two brothers, no matter what!
[07:28] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[07:47] ---
    Just you wait.
[07:49] ---
    I'll get you back
    to your parents in no time.
[07:51] ---
    Th-Thank you, but you can take your time.
[07:54] ---
    We're not in a big hurry.
[07:56] ---
    Starting now, you two
    are my little brothers!
[07:59] ---
    I'll look after you with plenty of care!
[08:01] ---
    Really?!
[08:02] ---
    What are you going to do
    for us, rich big sister?
[08:05] ---
    Now, now, you are to address me
    as Dear Sister Nagi.
[08:08] ---
    Yes, Dear Sister Nagi!
[08:11] ---
    What is the matter, Sakuya?
[08:14] ---
    Ow!
[08:15] ---
    Oh, I just had somethin' on my mind.
[08:18] ---
    Y-You didn't have to hit me...
[08:23] ---
    Now, then...
[08:25] ---
    While I said I would look after them,
[08:28] ---
    what in the world am I supposed to do?
[08:30] ---
    Dear Sister Nagi, how much is this vase?
[08:32] ---
    Huh? That's at best about 10 million.
[08:37] ---
    Hey, what about this painting?
[08:39] ---
    That's probably no more
    than 30 million, too.
[08:41] ---
    Awesome!
[08:42] ---
    Hey, Nagi.
[08:44] ---
    What is it, Saku?
[08:45] ---
    I'm gonna leave somethin'
    of mine here for a bit.
[08:47] ---
    I don't mind.
[08:49] ---
    It's a treasure of mine that's worth
    way more than yer ordinary junk,
[08:53] ---
    so don't ya dare touch it.
[08:55] ---
    I don't really have any
    interest in your belongings.
[08:59] ---
    Well, I'll leave it in yer care.
[09:04] ---
    All right!
[09:05] ---
    Now, I'll show you guys
    even more amazing treasures!
[09:09] ---
    Treasures?
[09:11] ---
    We wanna see!
[09:14] ---
    There, read whatever book you like!
[09:18] ---
    This is treasure?
[09:20] ---
    What's wrong?
[09:21] ---
    They're all über-rare doujinshis.
[09:26] ---
    I feel like she isn't
    doing anything different
[09:29] ---
    from what she usually does alone...
[09:30] ---
    Indeed.
[09:32] ---
    It seems you guys still don't understand.
SIGN    Can't show it, even on DVD
[09:34] ---
    Look! This book is said to be
    one of only 200 copies in the world
[09:38] ---
    and it contains the mythical
    final chapter of YuYu Hakusho...
[09:41] ---
    Ya moron!
[09:43] ---
    What did you do that for, Saku?!
[09:45] ---
    How is this lookin' after 'em?!
[09:47] ---
    Yer dealin' with little kids here!
    There're better things to do!
[09:50] ---
    For example, read a picture book to them.
[09:52] ---
    What? What a pain...
[09:54] ---
    Don't make the sort of face
    that kids'll wanna copy.
[09:56] ---
    Besides, this room
    is dedicated to doujinshis!
[09:59] ---
    Of course, there aren't any books
    for young children!
[10:01] ---
    Ya got it all wrong!
[10:02] ---
    If ya don't give 'em things
    that kids are more likely to enjoy,
[10:04] ---
    what's the point?!
[10:05] ---
    Things kids are likely to enjoy?
[10:07] ---
    I know! Do you guys like animals?
[10:10] ---
    Animals?
[10:12] ---
    We like them!
[10:14] ---
    Rarr...
[10:15] ---
    What's wrong? You said you liked
    animals, so I brought him here.
[10:19] ---
    Go on, play with him.
[10:21] ---
    Um, there's the danger that they
    might get eaten before they can play...
[10:25] ---
    Indeed.
[10:26] ---
    Ya moron!
[10:28] ---
    Why do you keep doing that, Saku?!
[10:30] ---
    Ya guys wanna hurry up
    and get outta this room, right?
[10:33] ---
    We do, we do!
[10:34] ---
    Sheesh, you guys are so spoiled.
[10:37] ---
    Then, next, we'll go to the game room...
[10:38] ---
    Hold it!
[10:39] ---
    Rather than stayin' inside,
    it's better for li'l kids to play outside!
[10:42] ---
    Don't just decide that!
[10:43] ---
    I said I would look after these guys...
[10:46] ---
    Outside is good!
[10:47] ---
    We'll play outside!
[10:49] ---
    Wha?!
[10:50] ---
    Majority rule. It's settled.
[10:56] ---
    Too rich for my blood.
    (Takou te kanawanwa.)
[11:00] ---
    Wahoo! Wahoo!
    (Wahooi! Wahooi!)
[11:05] ---
    Oh, hey!
[11:12] ---
    I'm a proudly independent
    online game warrior.
[11:14] ---
    Why must I play a Showa era game like this?
[11:17] ---
    Sheesh, ya really have no stamina, do ya?
[11:20] ---
    Shut up! And you're
    the one who suggested this!
[11:22] ---
    Why are you taking it so easy?!
[11:24] ---
    Hey!
[11:25] ---
    Haha! Nagi, you slowpoke!
[11:27] ---
    We dare you to come get us!
[11:29] ---
    Damn them... Returning my
    kindness with ingratitude...
[11:32] ---
    Call me Dear Sister!
[11:34] ---
    Miss, shall I take your place?
[11:36] ---
    Mind your own business!
[11:39] ---
    I'll catch you guys for sure!
[11:41] ---
    Yay!
[11:42] ---
    One! Two...
[11:44] ---
    She really is competitive, isn't she?
[11:46] ---
    Well, it's very like her, though.
[11:48] ---
    She hasn't changed one bit.
[11:51] ---
    She used to be extremely
    shy 'round strangers.
[11:53] ---
    She didn't even talk
    to me much to begin with.
[11:56] ---
    Well, she was surrounded
    by adults who were after her fortune,
[12:00] ---
    so it's no surprise.
[12:09] ---
    Yo!
[12:10] ---
    Hey, wanna go play explorers?
[12:13] ---
    What?
[12:14] ---
    Th-That's okay...
[12:15] ---
    Well, just c'mon.
[12:18] ---
    It was slow goin', but she eventually
    started playin' with everyone...
[12:22] ---
    I had no idea.
[12:24] ---
    Ninety-nine! One hundred!
[12:26] ---
    All right!
SIGN    Sanzenin Roadblock
[12:35] ---
    Wh-What could this be?
[12:37] ---
    Hello.
[12:40] ---
    Might you be one of their parents?
[12:43] ---
    Parents...?
[12:45] ---
    Oh, please! I don't have any children!
[12:48] ---
    I mean, forget about even going
    that far with the guy I like,
[12:51] ---
    about all we've done is hold hands.
[12:53] ---
    Oh, and resting his head in my lap.
[12:55] ---
    Wait...
[12:55] ---
    Look what you made me say!
[13:01] ---
    I-In front of Ogikubo Station.
[13:03] ---
    Still have not identified
    anyone fitting the description...
[13:06] ---
    Over.
[13:07] ---
    Not here in front of Mitaka Station.
[13:09] ---
    Not here are Oizumigakuen!
[13:11] ---
    Not here in Anime Town, Kami-igusa!
[13:13] ---
    Darn it! Find them! Find them!
[13:15] ---
    Go over every train station
    with a fine tooth comb!
[13:20] ---
    Whew! I'm tired!
[13:23] ---
    That was fun!
[13:25] ---
    How 'bout it? Feels good
    to play outside, too, doesn't it?
[13:29] ---
    Humph! I was not playing.
    I was only looking after these guys.
[13:34] ---
    But...
[13:36] ---
    It really must be nice to have siblings...
[13:40] ---
    Nagi...
[13:41] ---
    All right!
[13:43] ---
    I'm going to do this!
[13:43] ---
    I feel like I can do good this time!
[13:46] ---
    What?! Don't tell me...
[13:49] ---
    Dear Sister Nagi will now
    cook a fantastic feast!
[13:53] ---
    Ooh!
[13:54] ---
    Miss, are you going to be okay?
[13:56] ---
    Perhaps we should help you, too...
[13:58] ---
    Ah-ah! No need to worry!
[14:01] ---
    I won't mess up again like last time.
[14:03] ---
    You guys be good and wait, all right?
[14:05] ---
    Okay!
[14:09] ---
    All right, it's done.
[14:11] ---
    Itsuki, Shunji, thanks for waiting.
[14:13] ---
    Ooh!
[14:15] ---
    Uh, hold on a second.
[14:18] ---
    Here, say, "Ah."
[14:26] ---
    Oh, I was afraid of that...
[14:27] ---
    Miss, are you all right?
[14:29] ---
    I am fine, Hayate!
[14:31] ---
    I cannot allow something
    like this to defeat me.
[14:33] ---
    On my honor as the next
    head of the Sanzenin family!
[14:36] ---
    Hey, let's go.
[14:37] ---
    Fighting spirit alone will
    not improve your cooking.
[14:37] ---
    What? Okay...
[14:40] ---
    I'll help you, too.
[14:42] ---
    Okay... Thanks.
[14:44] ---
    Good grief.
[14:48] ---
    Oh? Where did those kids go?
[15:02] ---
    She said this contained
    really valuable treasure.
[15:05] ---
    Hey, Bro, let's not do this.
    What we're doing is bad.
[15:09] ---
    What are you saying, now that we're here?!
[15:11] ---
    We finally snuck into a filthy rich house!
[15:14] ---
    B-But...
[15:15] ---
    I figured it was somethin' like this.
[15:17] ---
    I got a big whiff of somethin' shady
    goin' on right from the get go.
[15:21] ---
    Well, it's nothin' to me
    if ya steal that cheap stuff from me.
[15:24] ---
    But ya know...
[15:26] ---
    ...if ya make my partner cry,
    I'll never forgive ya!
[15:29] ---
    Sh-She's scary!
[15:34] ---
    Hey!
[15:36] ---
    What in the world...?
[15:37] ---
    Hold it right there!
[15:41] ---
    What's going on, Sakuya?
[15:43] ---
    We can talk later. Let's go after 'em!
[15:45] ---
    A-All right!
SIGN    By Nagi Sanzenin
[15:50] ---
    What do you think?
[15:54] ---
    Maria!
[15:56] ---
    You did very well.
[15:58] ---
    Hey! It's done for real this time!
[16:02] ---
    Huh? Where are Itsuki and Shunji?
[16:04] ---
    Come to think of it, Hayate's gone, too.
[16:06] ---
    I never imagined those kids would...
[16:08] ---
    They probably got their reasons,
[16:10] ---
    but they got away before
    I could press 'em for answers.
[16:16] ---
    Maria!
[16:17] ---
    What's going on, you two? In such a hurry...
[16:20] ---
    The thing is...
[16:21] ---
    Did something happen, Saku?
[16:23] ---
    N-Nagi?!
[16:24] ---
    Um, it turns out that those kids...
[16:26] ---
    Moron! Don't say that!
[16:27] ---
    Those kids? Has something
    happened to Itsuki and Shunji?!
[16:31] ---
    Y-Ya see, those guys...
[16:33] ---
    A robber got into the residence just earlier
    and kidnapped those two!
[16:37] ---
    What?!
[16:47] ---
    Maria, Itsuki and Shunji
    are all right, aren't they?
[16:50] ---
    They'll come back for sure, right?
[16:52] ---
    Don't worry. The security robots
    will be sure to find the robber.
[16:57] ---
    We gotta find 'em before
    the security robots spot 'em!
[17:00] ---
    Sakuya, why did you do that earlier?
[17:03] ---
    Nagi'd be hurt if she learned the truth.
[17:06] ---
    Sakuya...
[17:07] ---
    And besides, I'm worried 'bout them, too.
[17:14] ---
    What should we do? Things have
    gotten really crazy somehow.
[17:17] ---
    They'll probably turn us over to the police.
[17:22] ---
    Intruders detected! Intruders detected!
[17:25] ---
    Bro!
[17:30] ---
    Are we done for?!
[17:31] ---
    Stop!
[17:35] ---
    Makita! Kunieda!
[17:51] ---
    Are you two both all right?
[17:54] ---
    Y-Yeah...
[17:55] ---
    Good grief.
[17:57] ---
    Ya guys, not a word 'bout this to anyone.
[18:00] ---
    We're sorry. We'll give this back.
[18:02] ---
    So please don't turn us over to the police.
[18:05] ---
    Don't worry. I won't hand ya
    guys over to the police.
[18:09] ---
    Really?!
[18:11] ---
    Yeah, and ya guys can have that, too.
[18:13] ---
    Keep it as a souvenir.
[18:15] ---
    What? But...
[18:16] ---
    This is an incredible treasure, right?
[18:19] ---
    Try openin' it up.
[18:34] ---
    Saku, what happened?! Did you find them?!
[18:37] ---
    Man, I had it all wrong.
    They weren't kidnapped.
[18:41] ---
    What?
[18:42] ---
    Then...
[18:43] ---
    Itsuki and Shunji's
    parents came to get them.
[18:47] ---
    What?!
[18:48] ---
    Seems they had some business they
    suddenly had to rush home for.
[18:52] ---
    They said they wanted to say good-bye to ya,
[18:55] ---
    but they apparently didn't
    even have time for that.
[18:57] ---
    Oh, my, how sudden.
[18:59] ---
    I see.
[19:01] ---
    But they found their parents then.
[19:03] ---
    I'm glad.
[19:05] ---
    Miss...
[19:09] ---
    Cheer up, Nagi.
[19:11] ---
    Saku...
[19:12] ---
    You've got us, remember?
[19:20] ---
    Right!
[19:21] ---
    It's doubtful the Sanzenin Miss
    will ever battle loneliness again
[19:24] ---
    or so it seemed on this long autumn night.
[19:29] ---
    Next time, they will fight a super butler,
    who looks somewhat familiar.
SIGN    National Kiddy Comedy Competition
[19:39] ---
    Why the heck?!
[19:40] ---
    Give it a rest already!
[19:42] ---
    Why the heck?!
[19:43] ---
    Give it a rest already!
[19:43] ---
    Go for it! Become popular entertainers!
[19:44] ---
    Why the heck?!
[19:45] ---
    Rake it in and escape from poverty!
[19:46] ---
    Give it a rest already!
[19:50] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha, the autumn is deepening.
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
[19:58] ---
    Yes, indeed. My appetite
    refuses to be quieted.
[20:01] ---
    I agree, Mistress Kuzuha.
[20:04] ---
    Come forth, Mysterious
    Butler of Darkness No. 3!
[20:08] ---
    Make Hayate Ayasaki...
[20:11] ---
    ...one of us!
[20:13] ---
    It's a dead heat! This is getting exciting!
[20:16] ---
    Speed! Energy!
[20:18] ---
    The motor passionately
    drives the four wheels!
SIGN    National Mini 4WD Grand Prix
[20:21] ---
    That's the fastest hobby
    there is, the Mini 4WD!
[20:23] ---
    Don't lose! Tear it up! My Emperor!
[20:26] ---
    This is nothing! The next corner
    will be the true battle!
[20:29] ---
    I have to get to the bottom
    of this ridiculous situation today!
[20:32] ---
    Uh, um, who in the world...
[20:35] ---
    Hmph! Time to dash!
[20:37] ---
    I'm Mysterious Butler of Darkness Mini 4WD!
[20:39] ---
    I have come to defeat you
    at the request of a certain person!
[20:42] ---
    "M-Mysterious"?
[20:44] ---
    O-Oh, so that's the premise...
[20:47] ---
    Uh, um, so who is this "certain person"?
[20:51] ---
    Do you want to know? It's...
[20:53] ---
    Uh-oh! This is a bad situation for them!
[20:59] ---
    There's a storm raging across the course!
[21:01] ---
    At this rate, both vehicles
    will be thrown off the course!
[21:05] ---
    At this rate...
[21:08] ---
    Go!
[21:17] ---
    Goal!
[21:18] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki's machine,
    the Hayate Magnum, is in first place!
[21:21] ---
    I did it!
[21:23] ---
    Damn it!
[21:27] ---
    I'll win the next race for sure!
SIGN    You Are Today's Champion!!
[21:31] ---
    Congratulations, Hayate Ayasaki!
[21:33] ---
    Thank you very much!
[21:38] ---
    Huh?
[21:40] ---
    I ended up dancing to their tune again.
[21:42] ---
    But there's one thing I've figured out.
[21:44] ---
    Someone...
[21:45] ---
    Someone is out to get me!
[21:47] ---
    What the heck are you saying
    after all this time?
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
     The End
[21:51] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:53] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:57] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:06] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:25] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:37] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:42] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:54] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:55] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:05] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:08] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
SIGN    Ayumu Nishizawa's
SIGN    Lettering by Mikako Takahashi
[23:25] ---
    Ayumu Nishizawa's Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    Hey, there, it's Ayumu Nishizawa.
    I hope you've all been well.
[23:31] ---
    I've been put in charge of this
    segment for a while to come.
[23:35] ---
    Don't you think this song is a great song?
[23:37] ---
    It's totally like "wavering maiden", right?
[23:39] ---
    I'd love it if you all memorized it
    and sang it at karaoke!
[23:41] ---
    I don't know if it'll
    get distributed, though.
[23:45] ---
    You're the thieving hamster!
[23:46] ---
    Oh, right, you're our guest today.
[23:48] ---
    I heard that I'd get to see
    Hayate if I came here...
[23:50] ---
    He said he was going to
    be late today. Too bad.
[23:53] ---
    Crushed!
[23:53] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    It seems Isumi is headed for this estate.
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    And she's coming alone!
[24:01] ---
    Alone?
[24:03] ---
    Please, help us!
[24:05] ---
    Crap! This is bad!
[24:07] ---
    Hallucinatin' in the middle of town is bad!
[24:09] ---
    Calm down, Sakuya.
    This fish is not a hallucination.
[24:14] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:15] ---
    "Devil Hunter Welcome
    Yoko Isumi, and Nabeshin".
[24:15] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
    Devil Hunter Welcome Yoko Isumi, and Nabeshin
[24:18] ---
    Wait, who in the world is
    that afro-ish person?
[24:20] ---
    Did you know?
[24:21] ---
    I hear Nabeshin can't eat
    things that are too hot.

32 - Devil Hunter Welcome Yoko Isumi, and Nabeshin

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:20] ---
    Hayate has been rather low on sleep lately.
[00:23] ---
    The reason for that... is a bit like this.
[00:43] ---
    I love you, Brenda.
[00:49] ---
    Why are you here?! Why did you
    wake me?! Why try to seduce me?!
[00:57] ---
    Wh-What the?!
[00:59] ---
    Don't look at me like I look delicious!
[01:03] ---
    I'm going to be eaten!
[01:05] ---
    Stop! Don't eat me!
[01:06] ---
    I'm an afro.
[01:08] ---
    I won't taste good!
[01:09] ---
    I'm an afro.
[01:10] ---
    I'm bland!
[01:12] ---
    I'm an afro.
[01:12] ---
    Wait, it's a dream!
[01:14] ---
    I'm an afro.
[01:16] ---
    It seems kind of afro-ish...
[01:17] ---
    Afro...
[01:18] ---
    Wait, what?!
[01:21] ---
    An afro?!
[01:30] ---
    Pardon me for interrupting your nifty scene,
[01:32] ---
    but who are you showing off for
    and what are you showing off?
[01:34] ---
    Oh, this way!
[01:35] ---
    More like, who?
[01:36] ---
    Nabeshin! He looks good in an afro.
[01:39] ---
    Nabeshin! He apparently
    owns four red jackets.
[01:43] ---
    Nabeshin! An immature director,
[01:45] ---
    who was invited by Kawaguchi
    and shamelessly came on the show.
[01:48] ---
    Nabeshin! Creates
    opportunities for tons of jabs!
[01:50] ---
    The number of women he's done is...
[01:52] ---
    Or rather, this is an awfully old intro.
[01:55] ---
    That's news to me!
[01:57] ---
    This is our current intro.
[01:59] ---
    That's news to me!
[02:00] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[02:03] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[02:09] ---
    Huh, so this is the current intro.
[02:12] ---
    I want a redo using this.
[02:13] ---
    It's a lot of work to reanimate, you know!
[02:16] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:18] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:21] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:27] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[02:32] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[02:37] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[02:43] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[02:49] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[02:54] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[02:59] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[03:05] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[03:10] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[03:13] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[03:16] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[03:21] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[03:24] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[03:27] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[03:45] ---
    Devil Hunter Welcome Yoko Isumi,
    and Nabeshin
[03:50] ---
    Um, the episode title screen is over...
[03:52] ---
    What? Oh, okay, okay, okay, okay...
[03:55] ---
    Then I guess I'll do this.
    And ignore the script.
[03:57] ---
    It's hard to tell
    if he's motivated or not...
[04:00] ---
    I'll be turning 43 this year.
    So what about it?!
SIGN    Mystery Woman
[04:05] ---
    The machine clinging to my legs
    cries out! It's a Walther P38!
[04:09] ---
    C-Could it possibly be...?!
[04:10] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki...
[04:13] ---
    Was that right, Mikako?
[04:15] ---
    Something like that, Director.
[04:17] ---
    It seems sort of fated
    that everything's going to vanish.
[04:20] ---
    Time for you to go!
[04:21] ---
    That's from Ame-Yoko, isn't it?
[04:23] ---
    What? H-How did you know that?
[04:25] ---
    There's a Nakata and
    Company's label on the grip.
[04:28] ---
    What? F-For real?
[04:29] ---
    Wait, you're right. Looks so cheap!
[04:32] ---
    Nakata and Company is...
[04:34] ---
    But I'm still shooting you!
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
[04:35] ---
    Listen to the narration!
[04:41] ---
    So what if I can't handle hot food?!
[04:44] ---
    A-Are you serious?!
[04:47] ---
    He's fast! Or actually, he's crazy!
SIGN    Escape
[04:50] ---
    Um, what are you doing?
[04:52] ---
    Oh, sorry, storyboard deadline.
    And we're cutting it next week.
[04:56] ---
    Storyboards for anime?
[04:58] ---
    Basically.
[04:59] ---
    Oh, I never introduced myself.
SIGN    Director Shinichi Watanabe
SIGN    Address: 29-29 Nerima Town,
    Nerima City, Nerima Prefecture
[05:01] ---
    It's supposedly a pretty rare business card.
[05:04] ---
    "Shinichi Watanabe". "Nabeshin" for short...
[05:07] ---
    Yup, yup. Directing anime and voice
    performances is my main occupation.
[05:11] ---
    Being a butler's a part-time job,
    so don't disturb me.
[05:14] ---
    Disturb you? But you're
    the one who started...
[05:16] ---
    And he falls asleep now?!
[05:18] ---
    Mr. Nabeshin, please wake up!
    Don't sleep like a log on the show!
[05:22] ---
    Oh, sorry. I didn't get
    any sleep again last night.
[05:25] ---
    An all-nighter?
[05:26] ---
    Last night, on a park swing...
[05:28] ---
    Why is it Kawaguchi?!
[05:30] ---
    The thing that's wrong
    with Kawaguchi is that...
SIGN    Ecstasy
[05:32] ---
    I never asked to hear about Mr. Kawaguchi.
SIGN    Topple
[05:40] ---
    Mr. Nabeshin, what is it now?!
[05:42] ---
    I-I'm hungry.
[05:45] ---
    Working night after night in the park?
[05:48] ---
    Apparently.
[05:49] ---
    And an afro for no purpose...
[05:50] ---
    It really is for no purpose.
[05:52] ---
    In this day and age,
    he's like a protected species.
[05:55] ---
    Uh-huh...
[05:56] ---
    I must safeguard him.
[05:58] ---
    What?! That's where this is going?!
[06:00] ---
    Seconds!
[06:01] ---
    Yes, yes, don't worry about weight gain
    and eat as much as you like.
[06:05] ---
    Don't trouble yourself on my account!
[06:06] ---
    May I ask for one more thing?
[06:08] ---
    Once more, please.
[06:09] ---
    May I invite my wife and kid, too?!
[06:11] ---
    Y-Yes, you may.
[06:13] ---
    They're already wolfing it down
    before you even said that!
[06:15] ---
    Don't trouble yourself on our account!
[06:17] ---
    Thanks for the food.
[06:18] ---
    You finished that food amazingly quickly.
[06:20] ---
    That was yum-yum.
[06:22] ---
    The dessert is yum-yum, too.
[06:23] ---
    Yum-yum!
[06:25] ---
    She was my kind of maid. Where did she go?
[06:27] ---
    Do you mean Maria?
[06:29] ---
    She's busy with a lot of things, so...
[06:31] ---
    As thanks for the meal,
[06:33] ---
    I was going to show her the DVD
    of us on "Welcome Newly-Weds!"
[06:37] ---
    We weren't newly-weds at the time, though.
[06:40] ---
    You can at least watch it, Hayate.
[06:42] ---
    I don't care about something like that.
[06:43] ---
    What do you mean "something like that"?!
[06:45] ---
    I-I'm busy with a lot
    of things to do, so bye!
[06:48] ---
    Hold on, Hayate!
[06:49] ---
    Please explain regarding "something
    like that" in the Kansai dialect.
[06:52] ---
    I'm gonna getcha!
[06:54] ---
    I'm sorry!
[06:55] ---
    Hayate had the following thought...
[06:57] ---
    I can't put up with this anymore!
[06:58] ---
    I don't want this! You can't! I reject it!
[06:59] ---
    And this is one of my shows.
[07:00] ---
    So mean! No fair! Slow! How far?!
[07:01] ---
    It brings back memories!
[07:04] ---
    Shoot! I'm dancing to their tune!
[07:06] ---
    Isn't this enough already?!
[07:08] ---
    And this is the bucket-shaped
    washing machine we won on the show.
[07:12] ---
    So useless!
[07:14] ---
    What is the big idea here?
[07:15] ---
    Whoever gets away with it wins, Kobayashi!
[07:17] ---
    I'll do it! Backwards!
[07:19] ---
    It's no use. At this rate,
    never mind the residence,
[07:19] ---
    Lululu, Excel!
[07:22] ---
    this entire anime is
    going to get taken over.
[07:22] ---
    Lalala, Excel!
[07:24] ---
    All right, I'll say it!
[07:25] ---
    I'm sorry.
[07:26] ---
    What?
[07:27] ---
    Please forgive my husband.
[07:29] ---
    Please.
[07:30] ---
    What?
[07:31] ---
    Just as tuna will die
    if they're not continually swimming,
[07:34] ---
    my husband can't survive
    unless he's continually in the spotlight.
[07:38] ---
    How unfortunate...
[07:39] ---
    This is not exactly by way of an apology,
SIGN    Nabeshin
SIGN    Desktop Calendar
[07:42] ---
    but please take these.
[07:43] ---
    What are these things?
[07:45] ---
    These are trifling things, but...
[07:47] ---
    They're my husband's Comiket goods.
[07:49] ---
    Y-You're giving them to me?
[07:51] ---
    Please buy them. At retail price.
[07:53] ---
    I don't want them! I mean, ma'am!
[07:55] ---
    I'm outta here!
[07:56] ---
    I said that enough is enough
    is enough is enough!
[08:00] ---
    Hayate.
[08:02] ---
    Look, look.
[08:03] ---
    Please leave!
[08:06] ---
    Tama!
[08:07] ---
    Meow!
[08:08] ---
    Thank you for having us!
[08:12] ---
    To hell with afros... To hell with afros...
[08:15] ---
    Hayate...?
[08:17] ---
    Another afro?!
[08:19] ---
    It's a wig, though.
[08:20] ---
    Hayate! I said, Hayate!
[08:20] ---
    She's been calling for you for a while now.
[08:23] ---
    Thank you for your kindness!
[08:25] ---
    It seems Isumi is heading over here.
[08:28] ---
    What? Isumi is?
[08:30] ---
    That's right. And she's coming alone!
SIGN    Iz A Shopping Arcade
[08:33] ---
    Alone?
[08:35] ---
    That's right.
[08:36] ---
    Members of Isumi's household
    informed me, so there's no mistake.
SIGN    Iz Headed Ur Way
[08:39] ---
    Where am I?
[08:39] ---
    But Isumi...
[08:40] ---
    ...gets so terribly lost every single time.
[08:41] ---
    Where am I?
[08:43] ---
    Where am I?
[08:45] ---
    She knows she'll get lost,
    so why does she always go out alone?
[08:50] ---
    That's easy!
[08:51] ---
    She actually thinks
    of herself as a reliable person.
[08:54] ---
    I shall be fine next time.
SIGN    Glint
[08:55] ---
    That's what she thinks.
[08:57] ---
    What?!
[08:59] ---
    But she always ends up
    getting lost anyway.
[09:01] ---
    That's why she's oddly... you know.
[09:03] ---
    "You know"?
[09:05] ---
    She's stubborn.
[09:06] ---
    I am an oddly stubborn person.
[09:12] ---
    Where am I?
[09:14] ---
    She had gotten lost, as always.
[09:14] ---
    Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
[09:16] ---
    I am in trouble. I am in trouble,
[09:18] ---
    but I shall be fine today!
SIGN    Glint
SIGN    Ta-da
[09:21] ---
    Why? Because I have a cell phone with me.
[09:24] ---
    If I use this, it will tell me where I am now
    and what path I should take.
[09:34] ---
    And the girl thought...
[09:36] ---
    "There is nowhere to punch in numbers!
[09:36] ---
    Stare...
[09:38] ---
    "The latest and greatest cell phone!
[09:39] ---
    "With a 240 megapixel camera
    with shake reduction
[09:40] ---
    Stare...
[09:41] ---
    "and a 1seg receiver.
[09:43] ---
    "And it apparently has
    the ability to play music,
[09:45] ---
    "but no buttons!
[09:46] ---
    "Come to think of it,
    it looks like it might open...
[09:49] ---
    "Yes! Open! It opens! This is
    something that undoubtedly opens!"
[09:58] ---
    Open sesame!
[10:00] ---
    Open sesame-sesame!
[10:02] ---
    Open sesame and salt!
[10:07] ---
    This cell phone is broken...
[10:09] ---
    It's yer head that's broken!
[10:13] ---
    S-Sakuya... That hurt...
[10:15] ---
    Why the heck?! Why can't
    ya open a cell phone?!
[10:18] ---
    What are you, Kars?!
    Have ya stopped thinkin'?!
[10:21] ---
    Kars is...
SIGN    Boom
[10:25] ---
    Isumin Kick!
    (Isumin kikku!)
[10:27] ---
    Sniff, sniff, smoked egg smells good.
    (Kun-kun kun-tama ii nioi.)
[10:31] ---
    I swear! Ya play the dummy
    to the hilt all day long.
[10:34] ---
    So? What the heck are ya doin' here?
[10:37] ---
    I am not telling someone who smacks
    people's heads with paper fans.
[10:41] ---
    Eh?
[10:42] ---
    Incidentally, if it's Nagi's
    house, it's over that way.
[10:45] ---
    I-I was just about to head
    that way as well...
[10:48] ---
    Ah, sorry 'bout that.
[10:50] ---
    But...
[10:52] ---
    Will ya be able to get there?
[10:54] ---
    A missy who can't even use a cell phone
[10:57] ---
    and has zero sense of direction...
[11:01] ---
    Well, don't ya worry.
    I'll make sure ya get there.
[11:05] ---
    I-I do not really need your help to...
[11:08] ---
    Yeah, okay, okay. I get it, I get it.
[11:11] ---
    Please help!
[11:12] ---
    I get it, I get it.
[11:20] ---
    Crap... Crap... This is bad!
[11:23] ---
    Please, help us!
[11:28] ---
    Splish-splash!
[11:30] ---
    Crap! This is bad!
[11:31] ---
    Hallucinatin' in the middle of town is bad!
[11:33] ---
    For the sake of us
    boys 'n girls' bright future,
[11:36] ---
    this kinda immorality
    shouldn't be permitted!
[11:39] ---
    Calm down, Sakuya.
[11:41] ---
    This fish is not a hallucination.
[11:44] ---
    What? But ya don't see 'em at the fish shop.
[11:46] ---
    He is a kind of land god.
[11:47] ---
    A "land god"?
[11:49] ---
    He is harmless.
[11:51] ---
    But...
[11:52] ---
    Truly what I would expect
    of the famed Lady Isumi!
[11:54] ---
    Color me surprised!
[11:55] ---
    So? How may I help you?
[11:57] ---
    Yes, the truth is...
[12:00] ---
    We would like your help
    in defeating a monster.
[12:02] ---
    Defeating a monster?
[12:04] ---
    Isn't he a monster?!
[12:06] ---
    Goodness, no!
[12:07] ---
    A monster has been ravaging our pond lately
    and we are at our wits' end!
[12:11] ---
    Truly, we feel as doomed
    as a carp on a cutting board!
[12:15] ---
    Just kidding.
[12:16] ---
    Let's go Isumi.
[12:18] ---
    This place'll also be swallowed
    up by the Sea of Decay soon.
[12:20] ---
    A god who says such worthless
    things can just go 'n perish.
[12:23] ---
    Oh, please!
[12:25] ---
    Wait, Sakuya.
[12:26] ---
    A monster formidable enough
    to trouble the land...
[12:29] ---
    Even if he is a "worthless god",
[12:31] ---
    A worthless god?!
[12:33] ---
    it still bothers me.
[12:34] ---
    Even if he's mad worthless?
[12:35] ---
    Even if he is mad worthless!
[12:37] ---
    Thank you very much!
[12:39] ---
    Some of the remarks were hurtful,
    but that aside, thank you very much!
[12:42] ---
    Lighthearted afro...
[12:44] ---
    Wonderful afro...
[12:45] ---
    What's with that tedious afro?
[12:47] ---
    Please rewatch the first half later.
[12:47] ---
    Full-bodied afro...
[12:49] ---
    Still, as always, Isumi is late...
[12:52] ---
    Um, shall I go check on her?
[12:55] ---
    I suppose... Then, I'm sorry,
    but I'll be counting on you.
[12:58] ---
    Isumi is delicate,
[13:01] ---
    so I'm worried that she may be
    getting hassled by some weirdo.
[13:04] ---
    Ya sure got hassled by a weirdo...
[13:07] ---
    Though, I kinda knew ya
    had a strange power...
[13:12] ---
    Is it 'cause these monsters're always
    hasslin' ya that yer always gettin' lost?
[13:16] ---
    I suppose... I think I get
    hassled maybe 2-3 times a year.
[13:20] ---
    Then that's not it!
[13:21] ---
    But he is not a monster, you know.
[13:23] ---
    What?
[13:24] ---
    He is a land god. A fairy born
    out of nature, if you will.
[13:27] ---
    Callin' somethin' like this a "fairy"
[13:29] ---
    totally ruins the image
    for the like of Tinker Bell.
[13:31] ---
    Then what're monsters?
[13:33] ---
    Monsters are beings that have
    attained supernatural powers.
[13:36] ---
    Beings that've attained supernatural powers?
[13:37] ---
    For example, they say that if a cat
    licks lamp oil every night for 20 years,
[13:42] ---
    it attains supernatural powers
    and becomes a goblin cat.
[13:44] ---
    I see...
[13:45] ---
    And people, too.
[13:46] ---
    If they attain supernatural powers
    somehow, they become ogres.
[13:50] ---
    Beings who have thus attained
    such powers are called "monsters".
[13:53] ---
    Then, the monster that's
    troublin' him is also...?
[13:55] ---
    Yes.
[13:57] ---
    Considering he is a carp,
[13:58] ---
    it is probably the koi herpes virus,
    which has been rampant lately,
[14:01] ---
    attaining supernatural powers
    to become a monster...
[14:03] ---
    We will call it...
[14:04] ---
    ...the Koi Herpes Monster!
[14:06] ---
    What the hell's up with that?!
[14:07] ---
    Hey, you!
[14:08] ---
    Carp?
[14:09] ---
    What did the Koi Herpes Monster do to ya?!
[14:11] ---
    What did he do? Well...
SIGN    Blush
[14:14] ---
    H-He turned me into live sashimi.
[14:18] ---
    Is that somethin' to blush
    about?! Live sashimi?!
[14:22] ---
    It was when I was doing
    synchronized swimming in the pond...
[14:25] ---
    And yer just gonna start
    narratin' the flashback?!
[14:27] ---
    Carpassion synchro-, love-nized...
[14:33] ---
    What are you doing?! No! Nooo!
[14:36] ---
    Stop! Don't be so rough!
    Don't force my skin off!
[14:40] ---
    What did I just say?!
[14:42] ---
    Whoops, I forgot the wasabi.
[14:44] ---
    Wasabi. Wasabi.
[14:45] ---
    This is my chance!
[14:46] ---
    Now's my chance to run!
    Right now, I can get away!
[14:49] ---
    Though I'm not quite full-fleshed!
[14:50] ---
    So the Koi Herpes Monster bastard
    tried to eat ya with wasabi?
[14:55] ---
    De-fin-itely.
[14:56] ---
    What a bastard.
[14:57] ---
    If it were me, I'd definitely
    do carp cooked in miso soup.
[15:01] ---
    Nooo! Don't!
[15:04] ---
    Anything but that!
    Please have mercy...
[15:07] ---
    Quit doin' synchronized
    swimmin' in the carp miso soup!
[15:09] ---
    More like, ya like synchronized
    swimmin' that much?!
[15:11] ---
    Ya in love with it?! Ya just can't stop?!
[15:14] ---
    A bit...
[15:15] ---
    Even so, he is technically a land god,
    so the paper fan is a bit...
[15:19] ---
    Visually, it evokes domestic violence, too,
[15:20] ---
    so you may suffer divine retribution...
[15:22] ---
    But don't ya think she'd like it?
[15:24] ---
    What?
[15:24] ---
    If ya tell Nagi 'bout this,
    she could use it as material for her manga.
[15:28] ---
    I cannot do that.
[15:29] ---
    Huh? Why not? It's funny.
[15:32] ---
    Ya don't come across
    stories like this every day.
[15:35] ---
    Nagi is excessively terrified of the dark.
    I could never tell her this.
[15:42] ---
    Come to think of it, when did she
    become so scared of the dark?
[15:46] ---
    I didn't think she was so bad
    with it way back when.
[15:51] ---
    So, something did happen, huh?
[15:54] ---
    I never intended...
[15:56] ---
    ...to make her cry like that.
[16:04] ---
    I'm scared!
[16:06] ---
    I'm scared!
[16:12] ---
    That is why I will never hurt
    a friend of mine ever again.
[16:19] ---
    That's quite a grand
    resolution, little girl!
[16:22] ---
    Th-That voice!
[16:25] ---
    So he's...
[16:26] ---
    That's right! I'm the Koi Herpes Monster,
[16:29] ---
    who became a monster
    by attaining supernatural powers.
[16:31] ---
    And my name is the Great Koi Herpes Monster!
[16:35] ---
    He's got the same exact
    namin' sensibility as you.
[16:38] ---
    No, he tacked on a "Great".
[16:41] ---
    He is the one! He tried
    to turn me into live sashimi!
[16:44] ---
    Or actually, he didn't try, he did!
[16:45] ---
    You think he can win against me,
[16:47] ---
    now that you brought
    this person to help you?!
[16:49] ---
    Shuddup, Anpanman's enemy!
[16:51] ---
    I am not Anpanman's enemy!
[16:53] ---
    I am the Great Koi Herpes...
[16:56] ---
    Bye-bycteria!
[16:58] ---
    I am busy, so I will make this brief.
[17:00] ---
    Switching on work mode.
[17:02] ---
    Yer merciless when ya get like this.
[17:07] ---
    Crap!
[17:09] ---
    We can't have you underestimating us!
[17:12] ---
    Herpes!
[17:20] ---
    I see. He's a virus, so he multiplies.
[17:24] ---
    This is a large undertaking.
[17:25] ---
    Yeah.
[17:26] ---
    Then, I am going to use an enormous power,
[17:29] ---
    so you draw the attention of the enemy
    while I do that, Sakuya.
[17:31] ---
    Huh?!
[17:32] ---
    Not to worry. Humans cannot
    contract the koi herpes virus!
SIGN    Twinkle
[17:38] ---
    "Twinkle"?! This isn't an issue
    of if I can contract it or not, is it?!
[17:41] ---
    Or actually, ya just said
    it all cool and stuff!
[17:44] ---
    I will never hurt a friend
    of mine ever again.
[17:47] ---
    Ya said so!
[17:48] ---
    You are full of energy, so you will be fine.
[17:50] ---
    Ya moron! I'm pretty frail, too, ya know!
[17:54] ---
    Wait, where'd the Carp God go?
[17:56] ---
    Oh...
[17:57] ---
    Mr. Great Monster, Mr. Great Monster,
[17:59] ---
    they were just talking about you guys,
[18:02] ---
    saying, "Aren't they a rip-off
    of the Black Devil on 'The Funnies'?"
[18:07] ---
    Ya fool! What're ya saying'?!
    And I mean that in all kinds of ways!
[18:09] ---
    We aren't a rip-off! We were inspired by it!
[18:12] ---
    Like it matters!
[18:14] ---
    We're not letting you live,
    no matter what it takes!
[18:18] ---
    And I get cornered in 4 scenes?!
[18:20] ---
    Die in another 2 scenes!
[18:25] ---
    Watch out!
[18:29] ---
    Butler-in-debt...
[18:31] ---
    Are you all right, Sakuya?
[18:33] ---
    Just what I would expect of my dear Hayate.
[18:35] ---
    He appears like a sudden gale
    when there is someone in trouble.
[18:39] ---
    A new player, huh?
[18:41] ---
    But one additional kid won't matter...
[18:43] ---
    Huh?
[18:44] ---
    Who are these people, who look like
    they're a rip-off of underling suits?
[18:49] ---
    We're not rip-offs! We're...
[18:57] ---
    So who are these weird people?!
[19:00] ---
    They're not people! They're monsters!
[19:02] ---
    The carp miso soup asked
    Isumi to defeat 'em!
[19:06] ---
    Eat this!
[19:07] ---
    Super Letter M Straddle Combining!
[19:16] ---
    I also got cornered easily!
[19:19] ---
    We're in big trouble!
[19:27] ---
    Eight Leaves, Sixth Form...
[19:29] ---
    Isu...mi?
[19:31] ---
    ...Crush and Destroy.
[19:40] ---
    Th-This can't be...
[19:43] ---
    Then, was that strange incident also...
[19:46] ---
    ...Isumi's doing?
[19:56] ---
    Please keep this a secret from Nagi.
[20:01] ---
    Now, shall we go to Nagi's place?
[20:04] ---
    Yes! Wait, Isumi, it's this way.
[20:09] ---
    Sheesh, ya can never be too sure with ya.
[20:15] ---
    No live sashimi! No carp miso soup, either!
[20:19] ---
    Wait, it's over.
[20:21] ---
    Woohoo! Now I can go
    synchronized swimming again!
[20:26] ---
    Do whatever you want.
[20:28] ---
    Ah! So you're finally here, Isumi.
[20:30] ---
    And Hayate, good work.
[20:32] ---
    What?!
[20:33] ---
    Yes, well...
[20:34] ---
    Bring everyone tea then.
[20:36] ---
    Yes, please leave it to me.
[20:38] ---
    Say, mind if I ask ya one thing?
[20:41] ---
    Ya know that thing ya did?
[20:42] ---
    With that power of yers,
[20:43] ---
    I think ya could've won
    without me drawin' the enemy away.
[20:46] ---
    How 'bout it?
[20:47] ---
    Oh...
[20:48] ---
    I cannot tell someone who smacks
    people's heads with paper fans.
[20:52] ---
    Wha?! Ya were still holdin'
    that against me?!
[20:55] ---
    You give me far too much credit, Sakuya.
[20:58] ---
    Liar!
[20:59] ---
    Arg! The way ya said
    that totally pisses me off!
[21:02] ---
    Those two get along well, don't they?
[21:05] ---
    Well, of course, they're friends.
[21:07] ---
    Why? Why?!
[21:08] ---
    I'm dissolvin' our friendship!
[21:10] ---
    This is good-bye!
    I'm positively denyin' ya!
[21:12] ---
    Arg!!!
[21:19] ---
    Friends, huh?
[21:21] ---
    You are good, afro!
[21:25] ---
    You, too, Mr. Carp.
[21:27] ---
    Friends!
[21:28] ---
    That's right, you have to take good
    care of your friends and afro hair.
[21:32] ---
    Next time, they will fight
[21:33] ---
    against another familiar-looking
    super pretty-boy butler.
[21:37] ---
    Carp cooked in miso soup
    with the sashimi I found!
[21:41] ---
    Thanks for the meal!
[21:43] ---
    I am Nabeshin, da-da-da!
[21:46] ---
    I look good in an afro, da-da-da!
[21:50] ---
    Whoever gets away with it wins.
[21:50] ---
    I hate tedious afros!
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:04] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:33] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:01] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:06] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate...
SIGN    Ayumu Nishizawa's
SIGN    Lettering by Mikako Takahashi
[23:28] ---
    and Ayumu Nishizawa's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    Ooh, Yah, Tah! I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I am Ayumu Nishizawa.
[23:36] ---
    Miss Nishizawa, you have
    appeared in every single episode,
[23:38] ---
    but we rarely get to
    meet in the show, do we?
[23:39] ---
    I know! I envy you, Sanzenin.
[23:41] ---
    Even the poor hamster apparently has fans,
[23:44] ---
    so we've prepared a fan service scene today.
[23:46] ---
    It's a scene that really pushes the limit!
[23:47] ---
    What?! This is news to me!
[23:49] ---
    Hayate, you're not allowed to look!
[23:50] ---
    What?! That's easy for you to say, but...
[23:52] ---
    But we have no time,
    so it'll have to wait until next time.
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    When it comes to autumn,
    it's the season of culture. Right?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    So, next time will be the Hakuou
    Academy culture fest episode.
[24:05] ---
    As members of the student council,
[24:07] ---
    we'll work hard to liven up
    the culture fest, too!
[24:09] ---
    So, Hayata, we'll leave the rest to you!
[24:12] ---
    R-Right...
[24:14] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:16] ---
    "Why?! Academy Culture Fest – Part 1".
[24:17] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
    Why?! Academy Culture Fest – Part 1
[24:18] ---
    Did you know?
[24:19] ---
    In the old days, the saury was a fish
    that was used only for oil extraction.

33 - Why?! Academy Culture Fest - Part 1

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:13] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha, please reconsider
    and give me a chance!
[00:18] ---
    The Modernistic Cast Iron Top Toy Butler!
[00:21] ---
    No, me, the Cyborg Wheeled Insect Butler!
[00:24] ---
    No, me, the Mountain Bike Combat Butler!
[00:31] ---
    No, to tell the truth,
    I am a bit tired of this.
[00:33] ---
    Y-You can't mean that!
[00:35] ---
    Sion, as I recall, our school's
    culture fest is coming up, is it not?
[00:39] ---
    Yes! Various groups are starting
    to prepare their stalls as well.
[00:42] ---
    Like sweets shops.
[00:44] ---
    Then it is time to go snack plundering!
[00:46] ---
    Oh!
[00:48] ---
    One moment please!
[00:50] ---
    I, the second assassin of the "Mysterious
    Butler – Non-Kids' Hobby Faction"
[00:56] ---
    will defeat Hayate Ayasaki.
[01:00] ---
    Do not make me repeat myself.
    I said I have tired of this.
[01:02] ---
    I have a gift I would very much like
    to present to you, Mistress Kuzuha.
[01:09] ---
    Oh! Those are from the cake shop featured
    on that Admatic show the other day!
[01:14] ---
    Mm, you are quite good. Do as you like.
[01:17] ---
    Yes, Mistress.
[01:19] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[01:23] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[01:29] ---
    Read it backwards or forwards,
    "KO-TO-KO" still reads as "KO-TO-KO"...
[01:32] ---
    Um, we're not forming a band
    or anything, all right?
[01:35] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:37] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:40] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:46] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[01:51] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[01:56] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[02:02] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[02:08] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[02:13] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[02:18] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[02:24] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[02:29] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[02:32] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:35] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:40] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:43] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:46] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[03:04] ---
    Why?! Academy Culture Fest – Part 1
[03:12] ---
    It's done! I managed to
    finish it just in time somehow.
SIGN    2007 Hakuou Academy Culture Fest
[03:19] ---
    All right.
[03:20] ---
    Today, I am definitely getting back
    to the estate to see the Miss.
[03:23] ---
    Oh? Hayata, where are you going?
[03:26] ---
    The school building is that way, you know.
[03:27] ---
    What?
[03:28] ---
    Festival loving Miss
    Committee Chairman, Red!
[03:31] ---
    Vice Chairman, Blue!
[03:33] ---
    Disciplinary committee member, Black!
[03:34] ---
    Together, the three of us are...
[03:36] ---
    ...the student body council!
[03:38] ---
    Come shake our hands
    at the culture fest hall!
SIGN    Ooh!
[03:45] ---
    G-Good morning.
[03:48] ---
    I never imagined you would really
    complete the arch overnight.
[03:51] ---
    Yes, it was worth it for us to twiddle
    our thumbs until the last minute
[03:54] ---
    before we begged you for help.
[03:56] ---
    If we hadn't made it on time, we
    would've gotten a real earful from Hina.
[04:01] ---
    Well, I'm glad we were able to
    salvage the situation somehow.
[04:04] ---
    I need to get going now...
[04:06] ---
    What?
[04:07] ---
    Hey, where do you think you're going?
[04:09] ---
    We still need you to do
    work in the classroom, too.
[04:12] ---
    What? Uh, um...
[04:14] ---
    We feel bad for making you work hard alone.
[04:16] ---
    This is the least we can do
    to make up for it.
[04:18] ---
    Let us sweat by your side together!
SIGN    Senzu Beans
[04:21] ---
    H-Here you are!
    It's to thank you for the arch.
[04:23] ---
    We're really, really counting on you, okay?
[04:34] ---
    Then shall we hurry along?
[04:35] ---
    We should get ready to open shop soon.
[04:38] ---
    Ooh!
[04:39] ---
    That's Hayata for you. So understanding.
[04:41] ---
    All right! Away we go!
SIGN    2007 Hakuou Academy Culture Fest
[04:46] ---
    Oh, Nagi, what are you doing here?
SIGN    Yonday
SIGN    Magical Destroy Nagi Sanzenin
SIGN    Magical Destroy
[04:55] ---
    Isn't it obvious? It's a solo culture fest.
[04:59] ---
    I-I think her interpretation
    of "culture" is a bit off...
[05:04] ---
    Oh, that reminds me. Hakuou Academy's
    culture fest starts today, doesn't it?
[05:08] ---
    I wonder if Hayate had to
    stay overnight again last night.
[05:11] ---
    Yes, it appears that way.
[05:13] ---
    I expect he's had a ton
    of work foisted off on him,
[05:16] ---
    because he's unable to say "no".
[05:18] ---
    I swear! He should only be so good-natured!
[05:21] ---
    Hayate's supposed to be my butler.
[05:23] ---
    He shouldn't work so hard for everyone...
[05:26] ---
    I see.
[05:27] ---
    If it bothers you that much,
    why don't you go to the culture fest?
[05:31] ---
    Wha?! I-It's not really bothering me.
[05:35] ---
    I hate crowds anyway.
[05:37] ---
    I hear Hayate is doing
    a cosplay café with the class.
[05:41] ---
    I imagine he's doing
    a splendid job about now.
[05:44] ---
    A c-cosplay café, huh?
SIGN    Customer
[05:48] ---
    What? An order? I despair of this world!
[05:52] ---
    Teacher! I mean, Master!
[05:55] ---
    "No, no, I'm still far from it."
[05:59] ---
    Well, no helping it then.
[06:00] ---
    If you're that worried
    about Hayate's safety...
[06:04] ---
    All right, I will go myself
    and do a bit of scouting.
[06:08] ---
    Yes, please do.
[06:10] ---
    Call the SP. I'll be leaving
    as soon as I get changed.
[06:17] ---
    Nagi still has such a childish side to her.
[06:22] ---
    N-No, perhaps that is not so true...
[06:25] ---
    Th-This is...
[06:28] ---
    The Hakuou Academy culture fest:
    a gigantic event held once every year
[06:32] ---
    that is a specialty of Ward S
    in the Metropolitan area.
[06:36] ---
    After all, it's a super prestigious school,
[06:37] ---
    so an endless roster of
    politicians, businessmen,
[06:40] ---
    and distinguished people
    from all walks of life come to visit.
[06:42] ---
    Surpassing the scope
    of a simple school festival,
[06:45] ---
    they get fabulous guests
    participating as well.
[06:48] ---
    Furthermore, the level of their
    research presentations is so high,
[06:51] ---
    even industrial spies and intelligence
    agencies from various countries
[06:54] ---
    supposedly quietly take note.
SIGN    KA-BOOM
[07:00] ---
    It's just a totally cultural
    and festive three days!
[07:07] ---
    Might I ask for another
    cup of royal milk tea?
[07:11] ---
    Certainly. Please wait a moment, Miss.
[07:17] ---
    Yes, how may I help you?
[07:19] ---
    Ah, you there, bring us
    more tea over here as well.
[07:22] ---
    On the double, in a pot.
[07:23] ---
    Yes, right away.
[07:26] ---
    Wait! Um, you three, why are you
    playing a leisurely game of cards?!
[07:30] ---
    Well, you are just so brisk
    and alert, we cannot keep up.
[07:33] ---
    Revolution!
[07:35] ---
    We feel kind of bad
    getting in the way of a pro.
[07:37] ---
    Counterrevolution!
[07:40] ---
    D-Don't say that! Please work!
[07:43] ---
    Besides, this isn't a cosplay
    café. It's a butler café.
[07:47] ---
    Huh? But we are in costumes.
[07:51] ---
    Um, could it be that you planned
    to make me handle everything
[07:54] ---
    and that's why you made it a butler café?
[07:59] ---
    I cannot say I approve
    of such paranoia, Hayata.
[08:02] ---
    A-All right, now that we've recharged,
    shall we get serious now?
[08:06] ---
    Y-Yeah!
[08:07] ---
    Thanks for your hard work, Hayata.
    You can rest for a while.
[08:11] ---
    In that case, I'm going to
    make a run back to the estate.
[08:17] ---
    Ayasaki, are you here?!
    You're here, aren't you?!
[08:20] ---
    Oh, Miss Katsura...
[08:21] ---
    There you are!
[08:23] ---
    If you're here...
[08:24] ---
    ...COME!
[08:24] ---
    Right now!
[08:25] ---
    Hey, wait...
[08:29] ---
    Oh, Little Nagi!
[08:32] ---
    Hey there, Hayate.
[08:33] ---
    I'll have you know, it's not like I came
    because I wanted to see you.
[08:37] ---
    I'm only here because Maria asked me
    to come check on things...
[08:40] ---
    If it's Hayata, he's not here.
[08:41] ---
    What?
[08:42] ---
    He got taken away by Yukiji.
[08:45] ---
    What? Hayate's not here?!
    After I came all this way to see him?!
[08:53] ---
    The Superintendent does not appear
    to be making any unusual moves at this time.
[08:56] ---
    Roger that. But don't let your guard down.
[08:59] ---
    Yes, ma'am.
[09:00] ---
    Given this rowdy atmosphere,
    there's no way she's going to behave...
[09:08] ---
    Ayasaki, what about this?
[09:09] ---
    You do this with that, and this
    with that! Omitting the rest!
[09:12] ---
    Um, what about this?
[09:13] ---
    Get it stamped at HQ, on the double!
[09:18] ---
    Ayasaki, you know, you know...
[09:20] ---
    I only have 500 yen right now,
[09:22] ---
    but between octopus balls and a
    Japanese pizza, which should I buy?
[09:25] ---
    I wouldn't know.
[09:29] ---
    Sis!
[09:30] ---
    Huh?
[09:32] ---
    What is this?!
[09:33] ---
    Why is Hayate managing things
    here for all he's worth?
[09:37] ---
    That's your job as the
    advising teacher, isn't it?
[09:40] ---
    W-Well, you know...
[09:42] ---
    I didn't really know how
    to answer all the questions.
[09:44] ---
    And it's a pain.
[09:46] ---
    Sis!
[09:47] ---
    I-I'm sorry!
[09:58] ---
    Haruko, can I ask you to handle things here?
[10:00] ---
    I do not mind.
[10:01] ---
    Thank you.
[10:02] ---
    Hayate, come with me for a sec.
[10:04] ---
    What? But I'm still in the middle
    of giving instructions...
[10:09] ---
    Um, Miss Harukaze, this...
[10:11] ---
    Make the judgment call yourself.
[10:12] ---
    Um, what about this?
[10:14] ---
    That will not be recognized as an expense!
SIGN    Receipt
[10:19] ---
    Here.
[10:20] ---
    It's thanks for taking care of my officers.
[10:23] ---
    Um, why...?
[10:26] ---
    Because it's written all over
    your face that you're hungry.
[10:30] ---
    It's fine that you're good-natured,
[10:32] ---
    but you're going to collapse
    if you push yourself too hard.
[10:42] ---
    Hinagiku!
[10:45] ---
    H-Hayate?
[10:48] ---
    H-Hayate!
[10:51] ---
    What is it, Jör? Try not to
    eat stuff off the ground too much.
[10:54] ---
    Superintendent!
[10:56] ---
    Hayate in danger!
[10:58] ---
    And in the meantime, Mademoiselle Nagi was...
[11:01] ---
    Sheesh! That Hayate!
[11:03] ---
    Where is he? And what is he doing?
[11:06] ---
    SPs, split up and look for Hayate.
[11:08] ---
    I'm tired, so I'm going to stay here and...
[11:10] ---
    H-Huh? Hey! Everyone?!
[11:12] ---
    Where did you go?!
[11:27] ---
    Hayate, you jerk...
[11:29] ---
    After I took the plunge
    to leave the residence, too...
[11:33] ---
    I wanted to...
[11:34] ---
    I wanted to walk around
    and see the festival with you...
[11:38] ---
    You there, the young lady
    with the pigtails...
SIGN    Fortune Telling
[11:41] ---
    If you would like, why
    don't you drop by for a bit?
SIGN    Fortune Telling
[11:47] ---
    I have no use for scams.
[11:49] ---
    Now, now, don't say that.
[11:51] ---
    My fortunes are 100 accurate, you know.
[11:55] ---
    What?
SIGN    Compatibility Fortunes Super specialized in mistress-butler relations!
[12:02] ---
    I-I see.
[12:03] ---
    I guess I'll kill a little time
    while I take a break.
[12:06] ---
    It wouldn't be bad to reconfirm
    the strength of my bond with Hayate.
[12:13] ---
    Very well.
[12:15] ---
    Then first, please look deep into my eyes.
[12:18] ---
    Hm? Like this?
[12:28] ---
    Ah... I can see... into your forlorn heart.
[12:33] ---
    I will help myself to the opening
    in your heart and take advantage of it.
[12:41] ---
    I'll listen to you, just once...
[12:47] ---
    Nagi Sanzenin, you
    are now my just-once puppet!
[12:57] ---
    Sweet potatoes! Roasted sweet potatoes!
    (Ishi-yaki imo! Oimo!)
[13:03] ---
    Oh, honestly, just a little, okay?
    (Mou, chotto dake yo?)
[13:08] ---
    Hayate, are you all right?
[13:10] ---
    W-Well, somehow...
[13:12] ---
    Oh, here's a souvenir.
[13:15] ---
    So you were immersed in Jör's
    digestive fluids and you are still fine...
[13:18] ---
    What? Jör?
[13:20] ---
    Jörmungandr. That is his name.
[13:23] ---
    His favorite foods are the five lands,
    three seas, and all living things.
[13:28] ---
    He really enjoys butlers in particular.
[13:31] ---
    What?
[13:32] ---
    That was a joke.
[13:33] ---
    Since this is a time slot
    that is supposed to cater to youths.
[13:39] ---
    But that didn't seem like a joke to me...
[13:42] ---
    And what is up with
    that suspicious-looking outfit?
[13:44] ---
    Superintendent, what
    are you plotting out here?
[13:48] ---
    Nothing. I am simply off duty right now.
[13:51] ---
    Ahem! Simply off duty!
[13:53] ---
    Though, I would not object,
    if someone were to entertain me.
[13:59] ---
    That reminds me, boy,
[14:02] ---
    I hear you spurned your prize of
    100 school credits from the butler battle.
[14:05] ---
    Your reason?
[14:07] ---
    What? That was, well...
[14:09] ---
    I didn't really have a need for it
[14:12] ---
    a-and from an education stand point,
    it wouldn't have been good for the Miss...
[14:15] ---
    "Miss"!
[14:17] ---
    "Miss"! "Miss"!
[14:19] ---
    Is the "Miss" the only thing
    that you have in your life?!
[14:22] ---
    What?
[14:24] ---
    You are a duller man than I had thought.
[14:27] ---
    Enough already!
    Let us forget about this guy!
[14:31] ---
    Please excuse me.
[14:33] ---
    Hello?
[14:34] ---
    Hayate, you wouldn't happen to be
    with Nagi, would you?
[14:37] ---
    What? Does that mean
    the Miss is here at school?
[14:41] ---
    Yes, she should've
    arrived quite a while ago,
[14:44] ---
    but it seems she forgot her cell phone
[14:46] ---
    and so I tried to get in touch
    with the members of the SP, but...
[14:48] ---
    I want to believe
[14:55] ---
    Power of flower
[14:57] ---
    Erina, you're the best.
    You're the best. You're the best.
[14:57] ---
    With arms wide open
[15:00] ---
    Erina, you're the best. You're the best.
[15:02] ---
    Like giving a tight hug...
[15:04] ---
    Is something wrong, Hayate?
[15:06] ---
    Y-Yes, it seems the Miss has gone missing.
[15:10] ---
    Huh? What are you saying?
[15:12] ---
    She's been right there for a while now.
[15:13] ---
    Huh?
[15:16] ---
    Whoa! There you are!
[15:18] ---
    M-Miss?
[15:19] ---
    Hayate, there's somewhere I want you
    to come with me for a bit.
[15:24] ---
    Hayate, there's somewhere I want you
    to come with me for a bit.
[15:29] ---
    Th-There clearly seems to be
    something serious going on...
[15:32] ---
    Yes...
[15:34] ---
    Anyway, I have something urgent
    to attend to now, so excuse me.
[15:36] ---
    Wait, I'll come, too.
[15:40] ---
    Um, Mistress Kuzuha,
    could that possibly be...?
[15:43] ---
    Mm-hm, it is his doing.
[15:46] ---
    He has done better than expected.
[15:48] ---
    This is getting interesting!
[15:50] ---
    We are going after them, Sion!
[15:53] ---
    Oh, my blood sugar level is still...
[15:55] ---
    M-Mistress Kuzuha!
[15:57] ---
    Hayate, there's somewhere I want you
    to accompany me for a bit.
[16:05] ---
    No matter how you look at it,
[16:06] ---
    she's in that hypnotic state
    you see a lot in manga and stuff, huh?
[16:10] ---
    Yes...
[16:11] ---
    I don't know who did this,
    but how dare they do this to the Miss?!
[16:15] ---
    Oh, she stopped for some reason!
[16:17] ---
    Hayate, all that aside,
SIGN    Japanese Pizza
[16:19] ---
    I want to try some of this food with you.
[16:23] ---
    E-Excuse me, I'd like one, please!
[16:26] ---
    Sure! It's tasty!
[16:27] ---
    Hey, is she really hypnotized?
[16:29] ---
    With the bewildered pair in tow,
[16:32] ---
    Miss Nagi aimlessly paraded
    all over the academy and...
[16:37] ---
    This is not the place.
[16:39] ---
    Nor here.
[16:40] ---
    Nor here.
[16:42] ---
    Nor here.
[16:43] ---
    Nor here.
SIGN    
[16:45] ---
    Nor here.
[16:46] ---
    Nor is it here.
[16:49] ---
    Yes, this is the place.
    This is where I wanted to bring you.
[16:54] ---
    Th-This is the old school building?
[16:57] ---
    Then why didn't you
    bring us here to begin with?!
[17:01] ---
    Hey! I let you manipulate me just once!
[17:05] ---
    Thank you for your hard work, Nagi Sanzenin!
[17:09] ---
    You did well to follow my order
    and lure Hayate Ayasaki out for me!
[17:14] ---
    Uh, does this count as being "lured out"?
[17:16] ---
    That outfit... Could it be that you're...?!
[17:20] ---
    Indeed!
[17:22] ---
    They call me the Mysterious Butler
    of Darkness, Just-Once Puppeteer!
[17:26] ---
    But that's just exactly what you are!
[17:29] ---
    Hey, what in the world is this?
[17:31] ---
    Miss, please snap out of it!
    It's me! It's Hayate!
[17:34] ---
    Hayate, I wanted to see
    the festival together with you.
[17:39] ---
    It's no fun being alone...
[17:42] ---
    Miss!
[17:44] ---
    That's right!
[17:45] ---
    I have to catch that guy quickly
    and make him undo the hypnosis!
SIGN    This Week's Butler Battle
[17:57] ---
    What?!
[17:58] ---
    A-A robot?!
[17:59] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, I will defeat you
[18:02] ---
    and restore our mistress's
    faith in us, without fail!
[18:12] ---
    Miss!
[18:20] ---
    What the heck is this?! H-How big is this?!
[18:22] ---
    S-Sis?!
[18:26] ---
    Hayate, I'll handle that guy!
[18:29] ---
    You look after Nagi.
[18:30] ---
    Wait, uh, where did
    that bamboo sword come from?
[18:33] ---
    Anyone who disturbs the academy's
    peace has to answer to me!
[18:38] ---
    D-Don't tell me you mean to fight
    the robot with a bamboo sword!
[18:44] ---
    Darn! Scurrying all over the place!
[18:46] ---
    Head!
[18:50] ---
    Th-This girl got the camera!
[18:52] ---
    Firing anchor!
[18:57] ---
    H-Hinagiku!
[19:04] ---
    You're mine!
[19:09] ---
    Wh-What?!
[19:13] ---
    Ow, that hurt...
[19:14] ---
    Hinagiku, please don't be so reckless!
[19:17] ---
    But I just found him unforgivable.
[19:21] ---
    Now, give up the fight
    and come on out quietly!
[19:24] ---
    I will now expect you
    to undo the Miss's hypnosis!
[19:26] ---
    In your dreams. The fight is just beginning!
[19:43] ---
    I will destroy Hakuou Academy!
SIGN    Warning
[19:54] ---
    Shoot! The sparks and firing
    the jet have affected the adhesive!
[20:03] ---
    What?
[20:04] ---
    Um, uh...
[20:17] ---
    This can't be...
[20:18] ---
    But the Miss...
[20:20] ---
    Nagi!
[20:21] ---
    I swear, that Hayate...
    It is no fun alone...
[20:26] ---
    To hell with the culture fest...
[20:28] ---
    I absolutely hate this culture fest!
[20:33] ---
    I knew it...
[20:34] ---
    Is she still hypnotized?
[20:40] ---
    I am the queen of the true culture of Japan.
[20:43] ---
    I will...
[20:45] ---
    I will show you what true culture is!
[20:49] ---
    T-True...
[20:50] ---
    ...culture?
[20:52] ---
    It is this!
[20:54] ---
    It does not just belong
    in the summer and winter!
[20:56] ---
    Autumn is the season
    for festivals to begin with!
[20:58] ---
    Autumn should have a new
    Japanese culture festival as well!
[21:03] ---
    That is quite interesting!
[21:05] ---
    Superintendent!
[21:07] ---
    Nagi Sanzenin, was it not?
[21:09] ---
    You are far more promising
    than that butler boy.
[21:12] ---
    What?
[21:13] ---
    I would love for you to show me
    this true festival of yours.
[21:17] ---
    Sure.
[21:20] ---
    M-Miss!
[21:22] ---
    Um...
[21:22] ---
    Do not follow me. I do not need dinner.
[21:26] ---
    And make sure you record
    that late night show.
[21:27] ---
    What in the world...?
[21:30] ---
    Hey, is that really hypnosis?
[21:32] ---
    Next time, a new culture fest will be held.
[21:35] ---
    Of all people, they will be
    fighting Miss Nagi!
[21:38] ---
    Incidentally...
[21:44] ---
    Oh, the boiled egg...
[21:47] ---
    They were in the midst
    of their sports fest today.
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:05] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate...
SIGN    Ayumu Nishizawa's
SIGN    Lettering by Mikako Takahashi
[23:27] ---
    and Ayumu Nishizawa's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    Spirit Transformation! I am Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I am Ayumu Nishizawa.
[23:36] ---
    Then let us get right to the long-awaited
    fan service shot of the hamster.
[23:39] ---
    Wow, this is exciting.
[23:40] ---
    Nooo!
[23:41] ---
    This is a powerful photo taken
    at a certain ramen shop in Suginami Ward.
SIGN    Super Big Bowl
    Finish the Ramen and It's Free!
[23:44] ---
    Will she finish eating it in time?!
[23:45] ---
    It's truly a photo about pushing the limit!
[23:47] ---
    Aw, no fair. Boohoo.
[23:49] ---
    Well, it's very like you,
    so I think it's good in its way.
[23:52] ---
    Oh, Hayate!
[23:54] ---
    Then see you again!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Um, this is the Hakuou Academy, right?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:59] ---
    Right? Don't you think
    it's a weird building?
[24:01] ---
    As of now, we will vend
    Nagi Sanzenin's doujinshi
[24:04] ---
    at a specially prepared
    booth in the Academy.
[24:06] ---
    Ayasaki, if your doujinshi wins
    against ours by selling better...
[24:11] ---
    In other words, this
    is a doujinshi sales competition?
[24:13] ---
    There is no way my manga
    will lose against you!
[24:16] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:17] ---
    "Why Dead?! Academy Culture Fest – Part 2".
[24:18] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
    Why Dead?! Academy Culture Fest – Part 2
[24:20] ---
    Did you know?
[24:21] ---
    At the world's largest doujinshi fair venue,
[24:23] ---
    it's hard to get through on your cell phone.

34 - Why Dead?! Academy Culture Fest - Part 2

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:09] ---
    I will show everyone what true culture is.
[00:14] ---
    All that aside, do the inking on this.
[00:17] ---
    What?!
[00:18] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha!
[00:21] ---
    I was getting rather tired
    of the normal culture fests.
[00:25] ---
    Besides...
[00:26] ---
    Right about now, that kid who's totally
    devoted to his Miss is probably...
[00:30] ---
    Miss!
[00:32] ---
    To think you would abandon me...
[00:35] ---
    Hmm, that might be nice.
[00:39] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha!
[00:41] ---
    Do the inking on this, too!
[00:44] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[00:48] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[00:54] ---
    Just you watch! With the power of
    my manga, I will make this world mine!
[00:57] ---
    Hey, you, are you really hypnotized?!
[01:00] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:03] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:05] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:11] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[01:16] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[01:22] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[01:27] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[01:33] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[01:38] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[01:43] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[01:49] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[01:54] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[01:57] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:00] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:05] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:08] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:11] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[02:29] ---
    Why Dead?! Academy Culture Fest – Part 2
[02:33] ---
    Really, don't you think you're worrying
    about this a bit too much?
[02:36] ---
    We even received a phone call
    from the Miss herself last evening.
[02:40] ---
    But don't you think it's strange?!
[02:42] ---
    That the Miss is participating
    in a school event of her own free will
[02:47] ---
    and she stayed the night
    with the Superintendent
[02:49] ---
    to liven up the culture fest!
SIGN    Butlers must be manly!!
[02:51] ---
    What part of your statement just
    now contains any cause for worry?
[02:55] ---
    Well, certainly, on the face of it,
    there isn't any, but...
[02:58] ---
    Well, Mr. Klaus doesn't know
    the Superintendent's personality.
[03:03] ---
    Or actually, there are a lot of issues
    with Nagi's normal behavior, so...
[03:07] ---
    Right...
[03:12] ---
    But this is just what I expect
    from you, Maria!
[03:15] ---
    To think you are aware of the
    personality of Hakuou's Superintendent!
[03:18] ---
    Well, her talent for causing
    trouble for others
[03:21] ---
    is the one area where
    she borders on the genius.
[03:25] ---
    I see...
[03:25] ---
    Oh, pardon me.
SIGN    Incoming call Miss Hinagiku Katsura
[03:27] ---
    Hinagiku?
[03:29] ---
    Um, hello? Good morning.
[03:32] ---
    Hayate, this is no time
    for leisurely greetings.
[03:35] ---
    What?
[03:37] ---
    What's happening, Hinagiku?!
[03:39] ---
    Look.
[03:41] ---
    Th-This is...!
[03:45] ---
    Um, this is the Hakuou Academy, right?
[03:48] ---
    Right? Don't you think
    it's a weird building?
[03:51] ---
    Uh, I think there are a lot of surprises
    besides the shape of the building...
[03:56] ---
    This is probably all Nagi's doing, right?
[03:59] ---
    What? Why do you say that?
[04:00] ---
    Because there were a ton
    of cars parked out front
[04:02] ---
    with manga characters and stuff on them.
[04:04] ---
    All anime-lovers have cars like that, right?
[04:07] ---
    W-Well, I imagine it's
    only a fraction of them...
[04:10] ---
    Whatever the case,
    the spectacle before them
[04:13] ---
    was an exact replica of the manga
    festival at Tokyo Big Sight,
[04:15] ---
    which will surely be held again
    at the end of this year.
[04:19] ---
    Numerous doujinshis changing hands.
[04:20] ---
    Character merchandise, such as body pillows.
[04:22] ---
    Doujin music CDs.
SIGN    Limited Color
SIGN    Limited Item
SIGN    Limited to Event
[04:24] ---
    At industry booths,
    figures limited to this event.
[04:26] ---
    DVDs with extras limited to this event.
[04:28] ---
    Incidentally, at our Rondo Robe booth,
[04:29] ---
    Following the trend of subsidized products,
[04:31] ---
    they are distributing not-for-sale CDs.
[04:31] ---
    we are distributing Ariake not-for-sale CDs!
[04:33] ---
    Family members who think this sounds
    vaguely familiar, not to worry.
[04:38] ---
    Also, be sure you don't look
    at the stuff your children buy.
[04:41] ---
    Since it may cause them
    to withdraw from society.
[04:46] ---
    Wow, the people look like rubbish...
[04:49] ---
    "There are not enough women's bathrooms."
[04:51] ---
    "There are people changing
    in places other than the locker rooms."
[04:54] ---
    "Do something about the resellers."
[04:56] ---
    "I wasn't able to buy Kagami merchandise."
[04:58] ---
    There are also others about change...
[05:00] ---
    I've heard enough already.
[05:01] ---
    I mean, these complaints have nothing
    to do with our culture fest.
[05:05] ---
    How true.
[05:07] ---
    Still, while it is impressive
    of the Superintendent
[05:09] ---
    to set up an event of this size overnight,
[05:11] ---
    the visitors who got wind of it
    and came are equally amazing.
[05:14] ---
    Don't be impressed!
[05:16] ---
    If we let this go, it'll end up
    like this every year.
[05:19] ---
    We may be able to make
    an enormous amount of profit.
[05:22] ---
    That's not it!
[05:23] ---
    With this many people gathered here,
    it's only a matter of time
[05:25] ---
    before one of the guests
    gets hurt, so it's dangerous!
[05:28] ---
    We have to do something about this.
[05:30] ---
    Um, I'm going to go look for the Miss.
[05:33] ---
    I think the root cause
    of this probably lies in the fact
[05:35] ---
    that the Miss is helping
    the Superintendent.
[05:37] ---
    And when you get down to it,
[05:40] ---
    that happened because
    I left the Miss all alone...
[05:44] ---
    To think your mistress has
    washed her hands of you...
[05:48] ---
    You've failed as a butler.
[05:51] ---
    Poem person...
[05:54] ---
    Nagi Sanzenin is being kept
    hospitably under our care.
[05:58] ---
    What?
[05:59] ---
    Oh, I'm aware of that,
    since we got the phone call.
[06:04] ---
    Phone call?!
[06:05] ---
    That is what you call "uncool".
[06:07] ---
    One could also call him a "goof".
[06:09] ---
    Or is it being a "bonehead"?
[06:11] ---
    He's "spacey" is what he is.
[06:12] ---
    That cowlick is also symbolic of that.
[06:13] ---
    Why you!
[06:14] ---
    Oh! "Spacey"!
[06:15] ---
    Shut up!
[06:20] ---
    Sheesh! What's with you people?!
[06:22] ---
    To think I came all this way
    to secretly guide you to where she is!
[06:25] ---
    What?
[06:27] ---
    Why?
[06:28] ---
    Thanks to her, I'm being
    hugely inconvenienced!
[06:31] ---
    Hurry up and take her back already!
[06:38] ---
    Wh-Why...?
[06:40] ---
    I can hardly believe we're
    on the same school grounds...
SIGN    Superintendent's Office
[06:44] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha is having
    a snack in the cafeteria.
[06:46] ---
    Now's our chance. Hurry.
[06:54] ---
    This has turned out wonderfully!
[06:56] ---
    Truly, the pinnacle of Japanese culture!
[06:59] ---
    Honestly! What do you
    think you're doing here?
[07:02] ---
    Come on, we're going back.
[07:03] ---
    Miss!
[07:05] ---
    Who are you people?
[07:07] ---
    What?
[07:08] ---
    Wh-What are you saying?!
[07:10] ---
    Oh, please. I am Hayate,
    your butler, remember?
[07:15] ---
    Don't lie to me. There's
    no way you're Hayate.
[07:19] ---
    You must be an imposter.
[07:22] ---
    If you were the real Hayate...
[07:24] ---
    If you were the real Hayate,
[07:26] ---
    no matter how busy you were
    with the culture fest,
[07:29] ---
    you would never...
[07:31] ---
    You would never have left me all alone.
[07:35] ---
    Miss...
[07:36] ---
    Hayate...
[07:38] ---
    Hey, hurry!
[07:39] ---
    If you keep dawdling,
    Mistress Kuzuha will be back...
[07:43] ---
    No mischief now, Sion.
[07:45] ---
    P-Please forgive me!
[07:48] ---
    Boy, you seem to have angered
    your mistress considerably.
[07:52] ---
    She is saying she will never return
    to her residence, you know.
[07:56] ---
    Surely not!
[07:57] ---
    Sanzenin, you are going to show everyone
[08:00] ---
    how wonderful your manga is, are you not?
[08:02] ---
    That is right.
[08:04] ---
    I will stay here and continue to write.
[08:06] ---
    You could do that
    at your own residence, too!
[08:09] ---
    Sh-Shut up!
[08:10] ---
    Keeping one's work and private life separate
[08:12] ---
    is a basic part of being a manga artist!
[08:14] ---
    You're a Hakuou student before
    you're a manga artist, remember?!
[08:17] ---
    And you, too, Superintendent!
[08:19] ---
    Gathering all those people
    just for the fun of it...
[08:21] ---
    There will be big trouble
    if someone gets injured!
[08:23] ---
    Interesting.
[08:24] ---
    Then let us take this
    opportunity to compete!
[08:28] ---
    Compete?
[08:29] ---
    I'm not telling you
    to cancel it or anything.
[08:33] ---
    It's just sort of dangerous
    the way things are now...
[08:36] ---
    As of now, we will vend this doujinshi
[08:38] ---
    at a specially prepared
    booth in the Academy.
[08:41] ---
    Ayasaki, if your doujinshi wins
    against ours by selling better,
[08:45] ---
    I will return your mistress
    and also restore the culture fest.
[08:50] ---
    What is with this "great
    and cuteness" attitude?
[08:52] ---
    This is like a plot development
    out of Comic Party.
[08:55] ---
    In other words, this is a
    doujinshi sales competition?
[08:59] ---
    Exactly.
[09:01] ---
    There is no way my manga
    will lose against an imposter!
[09:06] ---
    Um, Superintendent,
    are you listening to what I'm saying?
[09:10] ---
    So you would flee, you coward?!
[09:12] ---
    She is not listening, nor does
    she seem interested in listening.
[09:16] ---
    So it seems.
[09:18] ---
    I understand! We will accept your challenge!
[09:20] ---
    What?! H-Hinagiku?!
[09:23] ---
    However, to make things fair,
[09:25] ---
    the student council will also take
    over the running of this whole circus
[09:30] ---
    to make things fair and safe!
[09:31] ---
    Fine.
[09:32] ---
    However, if you lose,
    you will open a maid café
[09:34] ---
    with the entire student council dressed
    in super-embarrassing maid outfits!
[09:38] ---
    What?
[09:40] ---
    If you cannot accept those conditions,
[09:43] ---
    I have no intention of doing what you want.
[09:46] ---
    What shall we do?
[09:47] ---
    Even then...
[09:48] ---
    Even then, the safety
    of our guests is important!
[09:51] ---
    Hinagiku...
[09:53] ---
    You can win, right?
[09:54] ---
    Or more like, you better win!
[09:56] ---
    I won't forgive you if you lose!
[09:58] ---
    What? Well...
[10:00] ---
    A match between a mistress
    and her butler, huh?
[10:03] ---
    This is getting interesting.
[10:05] ---
    I will be the one to win.
[10:08] ---
    But Hinagiku, they're talking
    about a doujinshi sales competition
[10:12] ---
    and our class is set up as a butler café.
[10:14] ---
    Oh, that's true. You're right...
[10:18] ---
    Thus, both camps proceeded to do battle.
[10:21] ---
    Get over here quick
[10:22] ---
    And a one, two...
[10:23] ---
    Cheerful, with a cute heart!
[10:23] ---
    I'm a bit mad
[10:25] ---
    Get over here quick
[10:26] ---
    End of the Century Legend, Magical Destroy!
[10:27] ---
    At mach speeds
[10:28] ---
    Well-received and on sale now!
[10:30] ---
    Socially reclusive Sunday
[10:31] ---
    Those of you who wish to buy one,
    please line up in 3 rows!
[10:34] ---
    No, you have to come flying now
[10:38] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, get a taste
    of how powerless you are...
[10:42] ---
    No, no, you just have to
[10:44] ---
    And in utter despair,
    writhe about with tears in your eyes!
[10:48] ---
    What?!
[10:49] ---
    That was why you instigated
    this competition?!
SIGN    British-Style Cosplay Café
[10:59] ---
    Lose with all your might, Hayata!
[11:02] ---
    In fact, just forfeit, Hayata.
[11:05] ---
    I want to see Hina
    in an embarrassing maid outfit!
[11:08] ---
    Wh-What?!
[11:09] ---
    I'll have you know, if we lose,
    you guys have to wear it, too.
[11:13] ---
    What?!
[11:14] ---
    What did you say?!
[11:15] ---
    That would be bad.
[11:16] ---
    Right?!
[11:17] ---
    So we have to all support Hayate!
[11:20] ---
    And Hayate, you, too.
[11:21] ---
    What?
[11:22] ---
    If we don't win this,
    you can't get Nagi back.
[11:27] ---
    You have to make her snap out of it. Got it?
[11:32] ---
    Yes.
[11:37] ---
    It's exactly like Hinagiku said.
[11:40] ---
    I have to restore a smile
    to the Miss's face, no matter what!
[11:49] ---
    A night of bravo!
    (Yoru mo appare!)
[11:53] ---
    Combo string.
    (Renzoku konbo.)
SIGN    Top Secret Sales Chart
SIGN    Nagi Sanzenin
SIGN    Hayate Ayasaki
[11:59] ---
    We've won!
[12:00] ---
    I can just see Ayasaki crying pathetically.
[12:08] ---
    Th-There's big trouble!
[12:09] ---
    Their shop's sales are suddenly
    growing for some reason!
[12:12] ---
    What?!
SIGN    Invigorating Suginami Intelligence
SIGN    Hakuou Academy Culture Fest Report
[12:15] ---
    Once again, the season for the Hakuou
    Academy Culture Fest has come,
[12:18] ---
    Suginami Ward's special
    attraction of the fall.
[12:21] ---
    Among their shops,
[12:22] ---
    it seems this shop's cake set
    is particularly popular this year.
[12:25] ---
    Now, let us go check out the kitchen.
[12:29] ---
    Pardon me. Might I get a word with you?
[12:32] ---
    Yes.
[12:33] ---
    What is the secret to your flavor?
[12:35] ---
    Oh, no, all I do is put every
    ounce of my heart and soul into it.
SIGN    Hayate's Recipe
[12:40] ---
    Right now, along with the cake,
[12:41] ---
    you also get this doujinshi,
    which contains the recipe.
[12:43] ---
    Wow, that's a great deal!
[12:44] ---
    What is this?
[12:46] ---
    Also, the cover is a Mr. Shiraishi original.
[12:47] ---
    Well, Hayate can cook like a pro, so...
[12:50] ---
    Wow! I want one, too!
[12:52] ---
    One set comes out to 500 yen.
[12:52] ---
    But why is Hayate baking cakes?
[12:54] ---
    What?! That's so cheap!
SIGN    Butler Cafe End of Line
[13:00] ---
    Miss Butler, I'd like a cake set.
[13:02] ---
    I'll have the same.
[13:03] ---
    Yes, please wait one moment, Misses.
[13:07] ---
    I would like a cake set over here as well.
[13:10] ---
    Yes, certainly.
[13:11] ---
    I'd like service over here, too.
[13:12] ---
    Excuse me, Mr. Butler, are you listening?
[13:16] ---
    Young Master?
[13:18] ---
    Um, Miss, how would you
    like another cup of tea?
[13:21] ---
    Oh, my! You called me "miss"!
[13:24] ---
    Young Master,
[13:25] ---
    I never expected Nonohara
    and his master to come help, too.
[13:25] ---
    you still do not know what a butler is.
[13:28] ---
    Still...
[13:29] ---
    I'm sorry, Nonohara! Oh, at least let me...
[13:30] ---
    I wonder how the Miss is doing right now...
[13:32] ---
    Hey, Hayata, you can't take a break.
[13:35] ---
    P-Pardon me!
[13:38] ---
    If you don't work hard,
    we're the ones who'll end up suffering.
[13:41] ---
    I swear, if it was just Hina,
    we would have interfered...
[13:46] ---
    Then how about we have her wear
    a maid outfit in celebration if we win?
[13:50] ---
    Nice idea!
[13:53] ---
    I am not wearing it!
[13:55] ---
    And Hayate, break time is over.
    Hurry up with the cakes.
[13:57] ---
    Right!
[13:59] ---
    Now, I think I'll try the cake.
[14:01] ---
    Cake?!
[14:04] ---
    Whoops. Not good, not good.
[14:05] ---
    The enemy must not be underestimated.
[14:07] ---
    But there is nothing to fear!
[14:08] ---
    We are going to widen
    the lead in one fell swoop!
[14:11] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[14:13] ---
    If they are going throw in some cake,
[14:16] ---
    then I have an idea of my own.
[14:17] ---
    Sion!
[14:18] ---
    Y-Yes, Mistress!
[14:20] ---
    Oomf, oomf.
[14:22] ---
    Pardon me for the wait!
[14:28] ---
    Every customer who buys
    Nagi Sanzenin's doujinshi
[14:32] ---
    will receive a deluxe consolation prize!
[14:35] ---
    Now, you may have already bought one,
[14:38] ---
    but how about one more to take
    advantage of this opportunity?!
[14:39] ---
    Hayate...
[14:41] ---
    Calling me from somewhere
[14:46] ---
    With the end looming near,
    the competition got even more heated!
[14:47] ---
    O courage, o wind, sweep through
[14:51] ---
    And...
SIGN    Loser Park
[14:52] ---
    Calling me from somewhere
[14:57] ---
    I wonder what Hayate's doing...
[14:58] ---
    I don't care if I'm covered with wounds
[15:03] ---
    Calling me from somewhere
[15:06] ---
    Car! Car! Car! Car!
[15:09] ---
    Look, I'll become the most powerful hero
[15:11] ---
    Oh, that was so close!
[15:13] ---
    You got the consolation prize,
    the super deluxe home theater set!
[15:14] ---
    I'll be right there!
[15:16] ---
    All right!
[15:17] ---
    Because I belong only to you!
[15:17] ---
    That was too bad. Here.
    A catalogue and the doujinshi.
[15:21] ---
    Thank you very much!
SIGN    Sold Out
[15:22] ---
    And with that, we have sold every last copy!
[15:31] ---
    All right! In celebration of our victory,
[15:31] ---
    But I'm amazed it sold so well.
    This manga makes no sense.
[15:34] ---
    I think I will treat myself
    to a melt-in-your-mouth pudding party.
[15:35] ---
    They all just wanted the prizes, right?
[15:36] ---
    Yay! That's my Mistress Kuzuha!
[15:37] ---
    I guess so.
[15:48] ---
    He's not here...
[15:52] ---
    Are you being more stubborn than usual,
[15:54] ---
    because the hypnosis didn't quite wear off?
[15:57] ---
    What?
[15:58] ---
    In that case, getting back
    to your old self is easy.
[16:02] ---
    You are cleverer than I am, are you not?
[16:16] ---
    I see. I got it.
[16:18] ---
    Thank you, Haruko.
[16:21] ---
    Hina...
[16:22] ---
    Oh! Um... It looks like
    we're still a bit behind them.
[16:25] ---
    But they're out of ammo now,
    so we just may be able to catch up to them.
[16:29] ---
    But there aren't any more customers...
[16:36] ---
    It's just a little more,
    so let's do our best until the end!
[16:39] ---
    That's right! It's exactly
    as Miss Katsura says!
[16:42] ---
    If we lose, we get to see Hina
    in an embarrassing maid outfit.
[16:47] ---
    Let's not give up...
    and do our best and win!
[16:50] ---
    Ooh, he won.
[16:51] ---
    He won against something in his heart.
[16:54] ---
    All right! Then let's do our best!
[16:57] ---
    Yeah!
[16:58] ---
    Then shall we go look for customers?
[17:00] ---
    All right, I guess we'll go.
[17:03] ---
    What's wrong, Hayate?
[17:04] ---
    Nothing.
[17:05] ---
    Just thinking how fun it is
[17:08] ---
    to work hard together
    on something with everyone.
[17:10] ---
    You look rather glum for all that.
[17:12] ---
    Well...
[17:13] ---
    I was just thinking
[17:15] ---
    that I would've liked the Miss
    to experience how that feels, too.
[17:24] ---
    Then shall we get her to experience it now?
[17:27] ---
    What?
[17:33] ---
    Miss...
[17:34] ---
    Welcome. You came to have some cake, right?
[17:37] ---
    I'm certain to win this anyway,
[17:40] ---
    so I just came to see the bitter
    disappointment on your faces!
[17:44] ---
    Well, that's too bad.
[17:46] ---
    We still have some cakes left,
    so we wanted someone to come eat them.
[17:49] ---
    Right, Hayate?
[17:51] ---
    What?
[17:54] ---
    W-Well...
[17:56] ---
    If you're going to go that far,
    I suppose I have no choice...
[17:59] ---
    It just so happens that I used
    my brain to write my manga,
[18:02] ---
    so I need something sweet
    to resupply my tired brain with sugars.
[18:06] ---
    So...
[18:09] ---
    Bring me this supposed cake
    that Hayate has made...
[18:12] ---
    Certainly!
[18:18] ---
    Thank you for waiting.
[18:20] ---
    This is...
[18:22] ---
    This is our shop's signature dish.
[18:23] ---
    It's a bit unseasonal,
[18:25] ---
    but I made it with my affections
    for a certain someone in mind.
[18:30] ---
    This person told me
    that she didn't know me...
[18:35] ---
    So, I wanted her...
[18:38] ---
    ...to remember all the time that she
    and I have spent together...
[18:53] ---
    It's sweet...
[19:06] ---
    Hayate?
[19:08] ---
    Miss!
[19:10] ---
    Where am I?
[19:12] ---
    As I recall, I came to see you
[19:14] ---
    and I remember up to the point when
    a weird fortune teller talked to me, but...
[19:19] ---
    Miss!
[19:22] ---
    What is the matter, Hayate?!
[19:23] ---
    If someone should see us like this...
[19:25] ---
    Wait!
[19:26] ---
    We're totally being seen!
[19:31] ---
    Miss! Your hypnosis has worn
    off completely, hasn't it?!
[19:36] ---
    So what of it?!
[19:38] ---
    Look at the clock!
[19:39] ---
    Time is almost up!
SIGN    Top Secret Sales Chart
[19:41] ---
    But the difference in our sales
    is already obvious!
[19:44] ---
    Now, members of the student council...
[19:45] ---
    You will wear these delightfully
    embarrassing maid outfits
[19:49] ---
    and I think I will have
    you work in my service!
[19:56] ---
    Hello?
[19:57] ---
    Oh, Nagi?
[19:59] ---
    I thought maybe it was time
    the weird hypnosis would've worn off
[20:01] ---
    and you'd be with Hayate about now...
[20:03] ---
    Hm? Well, you're right,
    but what do you want?
[20:06] ---
    We're in the middle of a pretty
    serious-looking scene right now...
[20:08] ---
    Oh, I'm sorry, but I wanted to
    have some of Hayate's cake, too.
[20:13] ---
    Would you please buy enough
    for the members of the SP as well?
[20:17] ---
    About 2000 servings.
[20:19] ---
    Okay, got it.
[20:21] ---
    2000 servings of cake.
    Maria asked me to buy them.
[20:29] ---
    Thank you very much.
    You'll want it to-go, correct?
[20:35] ---
    I-It looks like we won.
[20:38] ---
    And that was the story of how
    the life-or-death doujinshi battle ended.
[20:44] ---
    But I wonder how Nagi's
    hypnosis came undone...
[20:48] ---
    Who knows? I wonder how...
[20:51] ---
    That's awfully sloppy.
[20:53] ---
    Hey, hurry, Hayate!
[20:55] ---
    If we don't hurry,
    the closing party will end!
[20:57] ---
    Wait! Please hold on!
[20:59] ---
    Th-This is embarrassing, Miss!
[21:01] ---
    Hayate, what's that outfit about?
[21:05] ---
    It's his punishment for neglecting me.
[21:07] ---
    What do you think?
    It looks good on him, right?
[21:11] ---
    Oh, it looks like the folk dance has begun!
[21:13] ---
    All right! Hayate, come with me and...
[21:15] ---
    Huh?
[21:16] ---
    I just can't go out like this!
[21:20] ---
    Oh! Hey! Hayate!
[21:22] ---
    Good grief...
[21:23] ---
    I guess it doesn't change
    the difficulties that Hayate faces.
[21:25] ---
    It must be tough to deal
    with someone who hates to lose.
[21:30] ---
    Wh-What's with the look you're giving me?!
[21:32] ---
    Oh, no, it is nothing.
[21:33] ---
    If there's something you want to
    say, speak up, all right?
[21:35] ---
    Cross-dressing, huh?
[21:37] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki... I still want him!
[21:40] ---
    Oh! Mistress Kuzuha!
[21:43] ---
    Thus, Hayate ended up back
    in the Superintendent's sights again.
[21:47] ---
    Next time, they will fight
    against a hip young town.
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:04] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:33] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:01] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:06] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate...
SIGN    Ayumu Nishizawa's
SIGN    Lettering by Mikako Takahashi
[23:28] ---
    and Ayumu Nishizawa's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    Pipiruma, pipiruma, I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    I'm Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I am Ayumu Nishizawa.
[23:35] ---
    Wait, you're still here?!
[23:37] ---
    You're supposed to swap out
    every 3 weeks on this segment!
[23:39] ---
    What? What's wrong with that?
[23:40] ---
    Besides, I haven't heard
    Hayate's opinion of my song yet.
[23:43] ---
    So, what do you think of my song, Hayate?
[23:45] ---
    Your singing the other day was 35 points,
[23:48] ---
    but this gets a full 100 points.
[23:49] ---
    These days, you can make tons
    of adjustments with technology.
[23:52] ---
    What a thing to say!
[23:53] ---
    Next time, we'll have Wataru and Saki.
[23:55] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Why is it?! Why can't I, a genius, draw it?!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    What is the matter, Miss?
[24:02] ---
    Nagi is writing a new manga right now.
[24:04] ---
    So, Hayate, go immediately
    and gather reference material
[24:07] ---
    on the date spots that young
    people favor these days.
[24:09] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:10] ---
    "Must-See! Complete Autumn 2007 Guide
    of the Latest Fashionable Date Spots
[24:11] ---
    Next Hayate the Combat Butler
[24:11] ---
    Must-See! Complete Autumn 2007 Guide
    of the Latest Fashionable Date Spots for the Young and Hip
[24:13] ---
    "for the Young and Hip"!
[24:15] ---
    And so, I will be going out
    with Hayate today.
[24:17] ---
    Going out with me?!
[24:19] ---
    Did you know?
[24:20] ---
    An Asian straight-tusked elephant fossil
    was once found in Harajuku.

35 - Must-See! Complete Autumn 2007 Guide of the Latest Fashionable Date Spots for the Young and Hip

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:09] ---
    Miss! Miss!
[00:12] ---
    MISSSSSSS!
[00:17] ---
    She's not here.
[00:20] ---
    That's strange.
[00:21] ---
    She's not over here, either.
[00:23] ---
    Where could the Miss have...
[00:29] ---
    Senpai!
[00:32] ---
    Wh-What has gotten into you, Miss?
[00:34] ---
    Senpai, please use this sports towel!
[00:38] ---
    I'll be cheering for you
    during today's match!
[00:41] ---
    Huh?
[00:42] ---
    Wh-What match?
[00:45] ---
    It's so embarrassing!
[00:46] ---
    The Miss has lost it!
[00:49] ---
    Nagi is currently writing a new manga.
[00:52] ---
    A m-manga?
[00:53] ---
    She's apparently trying her hand
    at a lighthearted teenage love story.
[00:56] ---
    Yes, that's right.
[00:58] ---
    I thought if I put myself
    in my character's shoes,
[01:00] ---
    the pages would just draw themselves, but...
[01:08] ---
    It's no good! I can't draw!
[01:11] ---
    Are you all right, Miss?
[01:15] ---
    It was going well up to a point, but...
[01:17] ---
    Going well?
[01:18] ---
    Yes, it was going well.
[01:20] ---
    I have Chadao Ohsotogari,
    captain of the kabaddi team,
[01:23] ---
    an institution at Saint Yam Academy.
[01:24] ---
    And our heroine, Nobue
    Iglesias, is in love with him
[01:26] ---
    and after numerous lame near-misses,
[01:28] ---
    she finally get to go on a date with Chadao,
[01:29] ---
    but this crucial scene isn't going anywhere
    and it's just a bulldog, wow!
[01:32] ---
    Uh, is that really
    a lighthearted teenage love story?
[01:35] ---
    It's completely cliché...
[01:37] ---
    Why?!
[01:39] ---
    I'm supposed to be a genius,
    so why can't I draw?!
[01:41] ---
    Now, don't get so hung up on that.
[01:43] ---
    I got it!
[01:44] ---
    I can't draw, because
    I have no reference material!
[01:46] ---
    Huh?
[01:47] ---
    That must be it!
[01:49] ---
    So, you heard me, Hayate!
[01:50] ---
    Yes?
[01:51] ---
    I want you to go immediately
    and gather reference material!
[01:53] ---
    R-Reference material?
[01:55] ---
    I want you to go to the date spots
    that young people favor these days
[01:57] ---
    and capture it on that camera!
[01:59] ---
    W-Well, but...
[02:01] ---
    I have absolutely no idea
    about trendy date spots.
[02:04] ---
    Oh, "Quit arguing! Your mistress
    is in dire straits! Hurry up and go!"
[02:08] ---
    Is that it?
[02:08] ---
    Yeah, yeah.
SIGN    Tokyo Date Spots
[02:11] ---
    Oh, man...
[02:13] ---
    I've never gone on a date before.
[02:16] ---
    A rare modern youth indeed.
[02:18] ---
    Please leave it.
[02:19] ---
    Alrighty. Leaving it.
[02:21] ---
    Let's see, where in the world should I go?
[02:24] ---
    When it comes to dates,
    shouldn't you look at Harajuku?
[02:26] ---
    I said, leave it!
[02:28] ---
    Harajuku...
[02:28] ---
    Wait, what?!
[02:31] ---
    Um... Um... Um, um, um, um...
[02:34] ---
    I-I-I-I-Is... Is... Is that you, Maria?!
[02:38] ---
    Yes.
[02:40] ---
    I didn't recognize your for a moment
    without your uniform.
[02:43] ---
    I was wondering who this
    fashionable young lady was!
[02:46] ---
    I wear clothes like this once
    in a while, too, you know.
[02:49] ---
    Oh, by the way, would you mind
    if I came along with you?
[02:52] ---
    What?
[02:53] ---
    Wh-What?!
[02:57] ---
    Whosoever commands the butlers,
    commands the world!
[03:01] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[03:06] ---
    A date with Maria?!
[03:08] ---
    Ah-ha, I get it.
[03:09] ---
    The punch line to this episode will be
    that it was all a dream.
[03:11] ---
    Yeah! That's got to be it!
[03:13] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[03:16] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[03:18] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[03:24] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[03:29] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[03:35] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[03:40] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[03:46] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[03:51] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[03:56] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[04:02] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[04:08] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[04:10] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[04:13] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[04:18] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[04:21] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[04:24] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[04:42] ---
    Must-See! Complete Autumn 2007 Guide of the
    Latest Fashionable Date Spots for the Young and Hip
[04:46] ---
    I see.
[04:48] ---
    So, the Miss asked to be left alone?
[04:51] ---
    Yes, it went like this...
[04:53] ---
    Oh, a flashback? I appreciate you
    taking the trouble to do it.
[04:56] ---
    It's... no... good...
[04:59] ---
    I just can't draw!
[05:01] ---
    I know!
[05:01] ---
    I can't concentrate
    because there are people around!
[05:03] ---
    "People"? D-Do you mean me?
[05:06] ---
    Maria, I will give you the day off today!
[05:08] ---
    Tell Klaus the same thing!
    I want to be alone!
[05:11] ---
    I see...
[05:13] ---
    Mr. Klaus! She actually...
[05:15] ---
    What?!
[05:17] ---
    There are various people working
    at the Sanzenin estate,
[05:21] ---
    but there are no people
    in the main building,
[05:22] ---
    because Nagi dislikes servants.
[05:25] ---
    So, that's what happened.
[05:27] ---
    That last image was
    a total mystery, though...
[05:29] ---
    First, an order to collect reference
    material, and now sending people away?
[05:32] ---
    She's acting like some popular manga author.
[05:34] ---
    She suddenly tells me to take time off,
[05:36] ---
    but I don't especially
    have anything to do...
[05:38] ---
    And so,
[05:40] ---
    I will go out with you today.
[05:42] ---
    Go out with me?!
[05:45] ---
    Go... Go...
[05:46] ---
    Would it be a bother?
[05:48] ---
    No, no, no, no, no, that is, uh, well...
[05:50] ---
    For you to go out with someone like me is...
[05:54] ---
    I thought I would go with you
    to help gather Nagi's reference material.
[05:59] ---
    What?!
[06:00] ---
    Oh, that's what you meant.
[06:02] ---
    Of course!
[06:04] ---
    Ooh! Smooth sailing! Smooth sailing!
[06:06] ---
    How are you doing?!
[06:06] ---
    Miss!
[06:08] ---
    You are so cruel to suddenly
    make me take the day off!
[06:10] ---
    This decrepit old man has nowhere to go!
[06:13] ---
    Shut up!
[06:14] ---
    Go to an arcade or an internet café!
    Surely, you can kill a day's worth of time!
[06:17] ---
    Don't cry, Klaus. It's disgraceful
    for a man of your age!
[06:24] ---
    Whoa... Couples...
[06:28] ---
    Couples...
[06:29] ---
    What is the matter?
[06:31] ---
    Uh, no, perhaps it's because
    I've gotten used to life on the estate,
[06:34] ---
    I felt a bit dizzy.
[06:35] ---
    But I must make sure I collect good
    reference material for the Miss!
SIGN    Shonen Yonday
[06:42] ---
    Let's see... What else should I photograph?
[06:46] ---
    I would say you absolutely
    cannot miss Takeshita Street.
[06:48] ---
    Takeshita Street?
[06:49] ---
    Yes, as I recall,
[06:52] ---
    first, at the entrance
    is "The Energizer House".
[06:54] ---
    There is also the Tunnels' Valentine House,
[06:56] ---
    Mr. Tokoro and Nori-P...
[06:58] ---
    Um, what era are we talking about?
[07:01] ---
    And that's the famous Mar...
[07:03] ---
    N-No! Even with it bleeped,
    that's just no good!
[07:06] ---
    How strange. They're all gone.
[07:09] ---
    Yes... I imagine they closed up
    shop quite a while ago.
[07:12] ---
    As we have repeatedly noted,
    Maria is a young and fresh 17-year-old.
[07:17] ---
    Well, you know,
    I did bring a guidebook, so...
[07:20] ---
    Shall we try walking around this area?
[07:23] ---
    Huh? Maria?
[07:26] ---
    Maria, could it be that you want
    to check out those clothes?
[07:30] ---
    What? Uh, n-no!
[07:31] ---
    Oh, please! I don't care
    about the latest fashion
SIGN    I want to look
[07:34] ---
    or have any desire to try on trendy outfits
    or love getting dressed up!
[07:36] ---
    I totally, absolutely don't! Not one bit!
[07:38] ---
    Are you sure about that?
[07:39] ---
    But I think it might help
    with the Miss's reference materials,
[07:42] ---
    so let's check it out.
[07:43] ---
    Y-You have a point!
    I guess we have no choice!
[07:45] ---
    Then, just for a bit!
SIGN    Über Beauty
[07:47] ---
    Y-Yes.
[07:49] ---
    Hayate, look! So many cute outfits!
[07:53] ---
    Oh, this one-piece is cool, too!
[07:55] ---
    Please feel free to take
    your time looking around.
[07:58] ---
    Maria's still just a normal girl.
[08:00] ---
    Um...
[08:01] ---
    Y-Yes?
[08:02] ---
    Hayate, would it be all right
    if I maybe tried some things on?
[08:11] ---
    Well, now!
[08:14] ---
    Incredible!
[08:16] ---
    Yay!
[08:17] ---
    Hey, you're in the way! Shoo! Shoo!
[08:19] ---
    But you're amazing.
    Everything looks really good on you.
[08:23] ---
    Oh, please.
[08:24] ---
    Starting now, please call me
    the Ebi-chan of the anime world.
[08:28] ---
    You're letting it go to your head.
[08:29] ---
    Who cares?!
[08:30] ---
    Okay, okay.
[08:31] ---
    She looks good! She's fantastic!
    She's being Ebi-ish!
[08:32] ---
    Oh, are you the boyfriend?!
[08:34] ---
    What?
[08:35] ---
    B-B-B-Boyfriend?!
[08:37] ---
    The boyfriend should try
    things on, too! Yup, yup!
[08:39] ---
    I'll coordinate a cool outfit
    for you guys! Yup, yup!
[08:43] ---
    I put you in those as a joke,
    but you look really good in them!
[08:45] ---
    Yup, yup, yup, yup!
[08:47] ---
    You look fabulous! Yup, yup, yup!
[08:49] ---
    You're awesome! Yup, yup!
[08:51] ---
    You make a nice couple!
[08:53] ---
    It's kind of embarrassing, isn't it?
[08:55] ---
    O-Oh, man...
[08:57] ---
    Ah! So delicious!
[08:59] ---
    When you come to Harajuku,
    you just have to get this!
[09:02] ---
    But it's boring. Nothing except
    the crêpe interests me.
[09:06] ---
    I came because Yukiji said
[09:07] ---
    an ethnic group that dances and sells
    bamboo shoots lives in Harajuku.
[09:11] ---
    It's weird...
[09:13] ---
    They are referring to the Bamboo Shoot Kids.
[09:14] ---
    Incidentally, if you
    don't know what that is,
[09:16] ---
    ask an adult you know or ask Maria.
[09:19] ---
    Well, no helping it.
[09:21] ---
    Once we finish eating,
    let's go back to school and take a nap.
[09:23] ---
    What?! We just got here!
[09:25] ---
    And we've only been in 3 scenes!
[09:30] ---
    If only there were something
    to get excited about...
[09:32] ---
    Oh, wait! There it is!
[09:35] ---
    I-I feel bad about this.
[09:37] ---
    You ended up buying
    clothes for me as well...
[09:40] ---
    N-Not at all.
[09:41] ---
    Ooh!
[09:42] ---
    That clearly dewy-eyed couple!
[09:44] ---
    If it isn't our good friend, Hayata!
[09:46] ---
    I had no idea Hayata had such
    a beauty for a girlfriend!
[09:48] ---
    Wait, that's Little Nagi's maid!
[09:50] ---
    Ooh! Hard to tell when she's out of uniform!
[09:51] ---
    In other words, this is the butler
    and maid's "love in Harajuku"!
[09:54] ---
    All right! Since we're here,
    let's liven up their date for them!
[09:59] ---
    Part of a teacher's job is to lecture
[10:01] ---
    about the pure and righteous
    ABCs of dating to one's pupils!
[10:04] ---
    Job? She's just having fun.
[10:06] ---
    But this is pretty interesting!
[10:08] ---
    Hey, hey, if they get married,
    do you think we'll get to deliver a speech?!
[10:12] ---
    A speech?! We'll be the guests of honor!
[10:14] ---
    We'll be leading the toasts!
    Swallowing Dom Pérignon whole!
[10:16] ---
    So! Get them!
[10:18] ---
    Off we go!
[10:23] ---
    Uh, the silence is kind of awkward...
[10:26] ---
    What should I talk about at times like this?
[10:29] ---
    Th-That store attendant called us a couple.
[10:34] ---
    It's odd, isn't it? A couple?
[10:40] ---
    Actually, when you get down to it...
[10:42] ---
    Why am I feeling so nervous?
[10:45] ---
    Um...
[10:45] ---
    Um...
[10:46] ---
    What?
[10:46] ---
    What?
[10:48] ---
    Oh, I should get some ph-ph-photos
    of this area for the M-Miss, too!
[10:51] ---
    Y-Y-Y-Yes, I agree. I agree!
[10:53] ---
    I'll take it for you, if you'd like.
[10:54] ---
    What?
[10:55] ---
    Is that supposed to be a disguise?
[10:57] ---
    It's just some afro wigs...
[10:59] ---
    What afro-ish people, ruining the
    fashionable atmosphere of Harajuku.
[11:03] ---
    Um, who might you be?
[11:05] ---
    Exactly who I look like!
    A super genius photographer!
[11:07] ---
    And her assistants!
[11:08] ---
    This enthusiasm... I don't feel like this
    is the first time I've met them.
[11:12] ---
    Are they people you knew in a past life?
[11:14] ---
    Both of them were feeling so nervous,
[11:17] ---
    they weren't even able to
    see through these simple disguises.
[11:20] ---
    The afro is to be feared!
[11:21] ---
    Ah! The photographer in me
    is itching to get to work!
[11:24] ---
    Please let me photograph you guys!
[11:25] ---
    No, thank you.
[11:26] ---
    All right! Let's put out
    a photographic collection!
[11:27] ---
    The title will be "Journal
    of Love 2007"! It's settled!
[11:30] ---
    Settled!
[11:31] ---
    Thank you very much. Then, please...
[11:34] ---
    Wait, why are you going along with this?!
[11:35] ---
    But since they offered...
[11:37] ---
    No!
[11:37] ---
    They're suspicious, no matter how
    you look at them! Too suspicious!
[11:40] ---
    You are too unguarded!
[11:42] ---
    That's good.
[11:42] ---
    You'd let them take tons of photos once
    they're got you going, wouldn't you?!
[11:42] ---
    That's good! That's good!
[11:44] ---
    It's dangerous!
[11:45] ---
    These types of people pretend
    to take normal photos
[11:46] ---
    Get closer together! Closer!
[11:47] ---
    and gradually move on to more extreme...
[11:47] ---
    Okay, let's go for a smooch!
[11:49] ---
    Hey, please stop!
[11:50] ---
    I swear!
[11:51] ---
    We're going to call it quits for Harajuku
    now and go somewhere else!
[11:54] ---
    A-All right.
[11:55] ---
    Why would they leave?
[11:57] ---
    Is it just me, or do they seem
    to find us annoying?
[11:59] ---
    They're just being shy.
[12:00] ---
    So cute!
[12:01] ---
    And so, the two moved on
    to the next date spot.
[12:05] ---
    In the meantime...
[12:10] ---
    The Miss's pen was still at a standstill.
[12:14] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[12:16] ---
    Maria! Tea!
[12:18] ---
    Oh, right. I'm all alone
    at the residence right now, aren't I?
[12:22] ---
    Well, maybe a little walk will be
    a nice change of scenery.
[12:26] ---
    Th-This is Hayate's room...
[12:30] ---
    And the door has been... left ajar...
[12:34] ---
    No, I shouldn't!
[12:36] ---
    Entering his room without his permission?!
[12:38] ---
    Every person is entitled
    to their own privacy!
[12:41] ---
    Whew. I shook off the urge.
[12:47] ---
    Oh! Is this a trick of fate?!
    Or is it the deed of a passionate heart?!
[12:50] ---
    M-My pen...
[12:51] ---
    I-In this case, as I expect...
[12:57] ---
    Keep dawdling and I'm leaving you behind.
    (Boyya-boya-shiteru to oitecchaimasu yo.)
[13:01] ---
    I will happily accompany you. Heart.
    (Yorokonde tsuite mairimasu. Haato.)
[13:04] ---
    Th-There was no helping it, all right?
[13:06] ---
    With what?
[13:07] ---
    To go get the pen I dropped,
    I had no choice.
[13:10] ---
    So you went in.
[13:11] ---
    It was beyond my control.
[13:12] ---
    Who are you making excuses to?
[13:15] ---
    B-Besides, it's Hayate's fault, too.
[13:17] ---
    When you go out, you should
    at least lock your door...
[13:21] ---
    H-H-His desk!
[13:23] ---
    S-So, this is where Hayate...
[13:27] ---
    ...always sits and studies...
[13:31] ---
    Wh-What am I doing?!
[13:35] ---
    I can't believe myself.
[13:36] ---
    Why am I so worked up over a little
    thing like going into a boy's room?
[13:39] ---
    B-But I feel a bit sick,
    so I guess I'll try lying down...
[13:46] ---
    It's only because I feel sick, all right?!
[13:48] ---
    You don't need to keep making excuses.
[13:57] ---
    Wait! What's the point
    of doing this anyway?!
[13:59] ---
    This is bad! I'm starting
    to feel sort of dizzy!
[14:01] ---
    I'm going back to draw my manga.
[14:04] ---
    Let's see... my pen... my pen...
[14:06] ---
    My pen...?!
[14:08] ---
    Th-This is!
[14:09] ---
    Could this be the thing
    every teenage boy hides?!
[14:12] ---
    Full of women's bodies...?!
[14:14] ---
    Hayate's keeping stuff like
    that behind my back?!
[14:16] ---
    No, knowing Hayate, surely not!
[14:17] ---
    But as his mistress,
    and his girlfriend, I...
SIGN    Wonderful Big Brother
[14:24] ---
    "Wonderful Big Brother"!
[14:26] ---
    He swings that way?!
[14:31] ---
    She wasn't able to accept it.
[14:33] ---
    Oh!
[14:34] ---
    The Miss has found my favorite reading
    material that I had stashed away!
[14:37] ---
    So you're the one that swings
    that way? Bastard.
SIGN    Kaminarimon
[14:40] ---
    Oh, my!
[14:41] ---
    Are we in Asakusa?
[14:43] ---
    Yes, just 30 minutes by subway.
SIGN    Fortunes 100 yen
[14:45] ---
    Medium Luck. What about you, Hayate?
[14:47] ---
    Please don't ask.
SIGN     Big Misfortune
[14:49] ---
    Hot! That's hot! Hot!
[14:51] ---
    Please settle down before eating.
[14:53] ---
    Hayate!
[14:54] ---
    Huh?
[14:55] ---
    Please look at this!
[14:56] ---
    Let me see.
[14:57] ---
    Oh, that's cute!
[15:09] ---
    Wh-Whoa, I forgot and
    I've been enjoying myself normally!
[15:12] ---
    I can't believe myself!
    Grabbing Hayate's sleeve?!
[15:15] ---
    How could I act so boldly?!
[15:19] ---
    Sir? Ma'am? How'd you like a ride?
[15:22] ---
    We'll make it cheap for you!
[15:24] ---
    A r-rickshaw?
[15:25] ---
    The newest date spots in season right now!
[15:28] ---
    We'll guide you to them all!
[15:30] ---
    This is perfect for the
    manga reference material.
[15:32] ---
    Th-That's true.
[15:34] ---
    Then...
[15:35] ---
    Please take us for a ride.
[15:36] ---
    Just leave it to me.
[15:39] ---
    Here we go!
[15:40] ---
    We're totally going!
[15:43] ---
    Th-This is fast!
[15:44] ---
    What incredible G-force!
[15:45] ---
    On to a date course that'll cement
    their love in one fell swoop!
[15:48] ---
    Onward!
[15:52] ---
    The Tanaka family's Jon, living in
    East Koiwa of the Edogawa Ward,
[15:55] ---
    is good at calculating!
[15:56] ---
    This is... a date spot?
[15:58] ---
    Not only that, but he's cheerfully
    getting the answer wrong.
[16:01] ---
    Next up, the Parasitological Museum!
[16:04] ---
    Wh-What's the point of looking
    at this during a date?
[16:07] ---
    This is a bit...
[16:08] ---
    May you have a long
    and happy life like a parasite!
[16:11] ---
    This is the most prominent haunted
    spot in the Metropolitan area.
[16:14] ---
    If you're lucky, you'll see the ghost
    of a woman hanging from the ceiling.
[16:16] ---
    D-D-D-Don't bring us around scary places!
[16:19] ---
    This might be good in the summer...
SIGN    SynergySP
[16:20] ---
    And the last spot is this! A company
    that makes lots of interesting anime!
[16:24] ---
    The person who plays Kirari
    Tsukishima is here, too.
[16:27] ---
    This is the finale?
[16:29] ---
    Please be sure to eat properly
    and get good sleep.
SIGN    Kaminarimon
[16:33] ---
    How about it? Were you able to
    immerse yourself in romance?
[16:37] ---
    Uh, we're back to where we started...
[16:39] ---
    But that was quite a valuable experience.
[16:42] ---
    Well, if you say so, Maria.
[16:45] ---
    Oh! My digital camera!
[16:48] ---
    Come on! Come on!
    Get that smooch on already!
[16:48] ---
    Whoa! You're that fake photographer!
[16:51] ---
    Smooch on!
[16:52] ---
    So persistent!
[16:54] ---
    The sea of Sumida is my sea!
[16:56] ---
    We're setting sail!
[16:57] ---
    We're getting on! We're getting on!
SIGN     Dessert Making Class
    Instructor: Grazie Maki
SIGN     27th Cake made with love
[17:01] ---
    It's done!
[17:04] ---
    It came out fantastic,
    if I do say so myself.
[17:05] ---
    I'm so glad I took the plunge
    and came to this dessert making class!
[17:08] ---
    My! This is fantabulous!
[17:11] ---
    You're too kind.
SIGN     Hayate Love
[17:12] ---
    All it takes is love.
[17:13] ---
    It's superb, grazie!
[17:16] ---
    I have never had a student
    make such a magnificent cake!
[17:20] ---
    How very kind of you. Grazie.
[17:24] ---
    I've lost...
[17:29] ---
    Looks like we managed to get away.
[17:31] ---
    Yes.
[17:31] ---
    Wait, hey!
[17:33] ---
    Hey, wait!
[17:35] ---
    We've put all this effort
    into livening up your date,
[17:36] ---
    so the least you could do
    is smooch! One smooch!
[17:39] ---
    Th-They're still coming after us.
[17:41] ---
    What tiresome people.
[17:43] ---
    The way things are going,
[17:44] ---
    I have a feeling they'll chase us
    to the ends of the earth
[17:49] ---
    until they get a photo of us k-k-kissing.
[17:50] ---
    If I'm to... If I'm to protect Maria...!
[17:54] ---
    The ship's power doesn't
    decide how well we can fight!
[17:57] ---
    I'll show you!
[17:58] ---
    Boom!
[18:00] ---
    Leap out, youth!
[18:02] ---
    Your head is mine!
[18:04] ---
    I mean, where are you?!
    Hiding is no use! No use! No use!
[18:06] ---
    Ready or not...
[18:07] ---
    Stay back!
[18:08] ---
    D-Don't do anything stupid!
[18:11] ---
    Come any closer and I'll jump!
[18:13] ---
    Wh-Why?!
[18:14] ---
    Why are you suddenly saying this?!
[18:16] ---
    What's this? What's this?
[18:17] ---
    Is this what they commonly
    call "the lovers' quarrel"?
[18:20] ---
    I'm sorry. There's someone else that I love.
[18:24] ---
    S-Someone... you love?
[18:27] ---
    He's a crew member on a tuna fishing boat.
[18:29] ---
    I don't get to see him
    for over half of the year, but...
[18:31] ---
    Y-You should forget
    about a guy like that! I'll...
[18:35] ---
    I can't!
[18:37] ---
    Even if I can't see him...
[18:38] ---
    Even then, I love him!
[18:43] ---
    Y-You can't mean that!
[18:45] ---
    I love him more than you,
    more than medium fatty tuna,
[18:47] ---
    more than the fattiest part of tuna!
[18:50] ---
    So please forget about me!
[18:52] ---
    Good-bye!
[18:53] ---
    Wait!
[18:56] ---
    W-Wait...
[18:58] ---
    I... I...
[19:00] ---
    I...
[19:02] ---
    Ocean, you jerk!
[19:06] ---
    Could it be... that we just...
[19:09] ---
    Maybe we just witnessed
    the death of a romance...
[19:13] ---
    Poor Hayata...
[19:15] ---
    Such is how fleeting and
    heartrending first loves tend to be...
[19:20] ---
    Let's leave the brokenhearted
    boy alone for now.
[19:25] ---
    Agreed.
[19:26] ---
    Time will surely heal all wounds.
[19:29] ---
    Let us keep what we saw
    today stored in our memories
[19:33] ---
    in the depths of our hearts.
[19:36] ---
    Having stored away the end of
    a romance in the depths of their hearts...
[19:40] ---
    Now, then!
[19:40] ---
    Let's go to Tsukishima to eat monjayaki!
[19:43] ---
    Yeah!
[19:44] ---
    It is said that after this,
[19:45] ---
    they never again recalled the events
    that transpired today.
[19:54] ---
    Maria!
[19:56] ---
    Hayate!
[19:58] ---
    We managed to drive them away!
[20:00] ---
    Thanks to your passionate performance.
[20:02] ---
    Oh, no, it was nothing so great.
[20:04] ---
    But I wonder what in the world
    those people were up to.
[20:08] ---
    Let's forget about them.
[20:10] ---
    We'll probably never see them again anyway.
[20:12] ---
    Now, shall we head home soon?
[20:14] ---
    The Miss is sure to be waiting eagerly...
[20:16] ---
    Please wait.
[20:18] ---
    What is it?
[20:19] ---
    Hayate...
[20:21] ---
    How about going for a ride
    in that to end the day?
[20:29] ---
    Maria, thank you very much for today.
[20:32] ---
    Not at all. I should
    be the one thanking you.
[20:35] ---
    But...
[20:36] ---
    What?
[20:36] ---
    Next time, I hope you get to go on a date
    with someone you really love.
[20:41] ---
    What? Well...
[20:44] ---
    H-How should I respond here?
[20:47] ---
    But before that happens...
[20:48] ---
    Shall we bring Nagi along next time
    and go on a date, the three of us?
[20:52] ---
    Oh, yes! I'd love to!
[20:54] ---
    Oh, then, let's take one last photo.
[21:07] ---
    What do you think, Miss?
[21:09] ---
    Don't you think the photos
    turned out quite well?
[21:12] ---
    We also went to places
    like Harajuku and Asakusa
[21:14] ---
    and got good reference photos,
[21:16] ---
    so I'm sure you'll be able to...
[21:17] ---
    ...draw... a great manga...
[21:24] ---
    Don't give me that crap!
[21:29] ---
    Here I was, agonizing my head off
[21:31] ---
    and you were enjoying yourself like a fool!
[21:35] ---
    So, why don't you go out
    first thing this morning
[21:38] ---
    and invite your boyfriend
    or girlfriend on a romantic date?
[21:42] ---
    Well, assuming you have someone, that is.
[21:44] ---
    If you have someone...
[21:46] ---
    Hey, don't say potentially
    offensive things to the audience!
[21:49] ---
    Next time, they'll be fighting
    the troubles of an aging man.
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:06] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    Wataru...
SIGN    Wataru & Saki's
SIGN    Illustration by Marina Inoue
[23:27] ---
    And Saki's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    Hey! I'm Wataru Tachibana.
[23:31] ---
    And I'm Saki Kijima.
[23:33] ---
    Since the theme song for Rental Video Tachibana is finally ready,
[23:36] ---
    we're here to let you hear it!
[23:37] ---
    Wait, is this the shop's theme song?
[23:40] ---
    That's right. Did you not know?
[23:42] ---
    But it doesn't mention "Rental Video Tachibana" at all.
[23:45] ---
    Well, you know how it is. It's one of those "image songs."
[23:49] ---
    But don't just rent this song! Head out to the store and—
[23:51] ---
    Young sir, wait! That's going too far!
[23:52] ---
    Yeah, I guess you're right.
[23:54] ---
    See you next time!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Goodness! To think I had become a coffee
    plantation owner, comfortably retired.
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] ---
    What a strange dream I had.
[24:03] ---
    Go ahead. If you want to
    retire, why don't you?
[24:05] ---
    What?!
[24:06] ---
    What could have gotten into Mr. Klaus?
    He seems so depressed.
[24:08] ---
    Nagi telling him to quit must have come as quite a shock.
[24:11] ---
    I am my mistress's shadow.
[24:12] ---
    If I feel I am no longer of any use to her
[24:14] ---
    then I will simply fade away!
[24:17] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:18] ---
    Klaus Is Japanese Because
    His Name Is Written "Kurausu"
[24:18] ---
    "Klaus Is Japanese Because
    His Name Is Written 'Kurausu'".
[24:20] ---
    Did you know?
[24:21] ---
    Takamori Saigo's real name is Takenaga!

36 - Klaus Is Japanese Because His Name Is Written "Kurausu"

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:17] ---
    My name is Seishiro Kurausu.
[00:20] ---
    I have retired as a butler
[00:21] ---
    and now live as a plantation owner in Brazil.
[00:26] ---
    Wait! I have yet to retire!
[00:28] ---
    I will be a Sanzenin butler to the very end!
[00:31] ---
    There's nothing left for you to do.
[00:35] ---
    And a replacement for Himegami's
    been found already,
[00:37] ---
    so I'm sure you've got no regrets left.
[00:39] ---
    What could a beast know of my feelings?!
[00:42] ---
    Doesn't it bother you more
    that the beast is talking?
[00:45] ---
    It looks like even that
    poverty-stricken butler
[00:47] ---
    will be able to manage
    the spoiled little miss.
[00:49] ---
    Hah! As if I could leave it in
    the hands of that greenhorn!
[00:52] ---
    I'm going back to Japan!
[00:53] ---
    Oh, no, you aren't.
[00:55] ---
    You're going to enjoy the rest of
    your days here in Brazil with me!
[00:59] ---
    What?!
[00:59] ---
    No, not that!
[01:01] ---
    Not that!
[01:03] ---
    Tama! So it was you?!
[01:06] ---
    So it's a dream punch line
    right off the bat this week?
[01:08] ---
    Well, then, good-bye, everyone.
[01:12] ---
    There's no way a tiger would talk.
[01:15] ---
    I must be tired.
[01:17] ---
    Brazil Overseas Trips for Seniors
[01:18] ---
    What's this?
[01:22] ---
    "Coffee plantation owner wanted in Brazil"?
[01:25] ---
    How did this get into my room?
[01:31] ---
    Whosoever commands the
    butlers, commands the world!
[01:36] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[01:41] ---
    "Klaus" is written as "kura"
    as in "kurashiki (warehouse)"
[01:42] ---
    and "usu" as in "usu-kine
    (mortar and pounder)"
[01:44] ---
    I am 100% Japanese!
[01:47] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:50] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:52] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:58] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[02:03] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[02:08] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[02:14] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[02:20] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[02:25] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[02:30] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[02:36] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[02:41] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[02:44] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:47] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:52] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:55] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:58] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[03:16] ---
    Klaus is Japanese Because His
    Name Is Written "Kurausu"
[03:27] ---
    A good temperature.
[03:33] ---
    Ironing out the morning paper.
[03:34] ---
    This is the butler's first
    duty of the morning.
[03:41] ---
    As expected, the delayed
    release of "Dragon Quest"
[03:43] ---
    is affecting the price of the stock.
[03:45] ---
    Goodness!
[03:46] ---
    To think I had become a coffee
    plantation owner, comfortably retired.
[03:51] ---
    What a strange dream I had.
[03:54] ---
    Go ahead.
[03:55] ---
    Huh?
[03:57] ---
    If you want to retire, why don't you?
[03:59] ---
    What?!
[04:00] ---
    Heavens, no!
[04:02] ---
    I intend to spend the rest of my
    days at the Sanzenin household!
[04:04] ---
    I was merely speaking
    of what I had dreamed...
[04:07] ---
    According to Freud, dreams embody
    your unconscious desires.
[04:12] ---
    In the depths of your heart,
[04:13] ---
    you are thinking you are tired
    already and want to retire.
[04:16] ---
    I-I am not!
[04:18] ---
    Besides, if I were to leave,
    the Sanzenin household would...
[04:21] ---
    ...have no problem whatsoever.
[04:22] ---
    What?!
[04:23] ---
    Hayate and Maria will take
    care of the day-to-day things.
[04:26] ---
    Oh, no need to worry about
    asset management and such.
[04:29] ---
    Especially with the recent IT-related stocks,
[04:32] ---
    it's probably beyond your abilities already.
[04:35] ---
    Anyway, I'll be fine.
[04:43] ---
    I must not run. I must not run.
[04:45] ---
    I must not run. I must not run.
[04:46] ---
    Um, Mr. Klaus?
[04:50] ---
    An AT Field! An emotional barrier, I see.
[04:52] ---
    Oh, Maria.
[04:54] ---
    Oh, I don't know anymore.
[04:57] ---
    What could have gotten into Mr.
    Klaus? He seems so depressed.
[05:00] ---
    Yes, something must have come
    as a great shock to him...
[05:04] ---
    Oh!
[05:05] ---
    Huh?
[05:06] ---
    Aim for a Space Legacy?!
    Mahal
[05:06] ---
    No idea. Though, I did tell
    him that he could quit.
[05:09] ---
    You didn't have to take
    his dream seriously...
[05:12] ---
    Normally, if you have a butler who
    has served you for many years...
[05:17] ---
    You give them a room of
    their own at the residence
[05:20] ---
    and treat them like family...
[05:23] ---
    It must have come as a
    shock to be told to quit.
[05:26] ---
    There's no way he'd quit
    over something like that!
[05:29] ---
    Deep inside, you must adore
    Mr. Klaus very much, Miss.
[05:34] ---
    H-He's just an easy character to mess with.
[05:37] ---
    Then please don't tell him to quit.
[05:41] ---
    He may be getting swallowed up
    in Dirac's sea right about now.
[05:44] ---
    Indeed.
[05:45] ---
    Then go do an involuntary
    salvage operation or something!
[05:49] ---
    Understood.
[05:50] ---
    What was that laugh for?!
[05:53] ---
    I'm coming in.
[05:59] ---
    Head Butler.
[06:00] ---
    Oh, Maria, the Miss has
    given me some time off.
[06:04] ---
    I will spend the rest of my life in Brazil.
[06:07] ---
    P-Please! There's no way the Miss
    seriously wants you to quit, right?
[06:11] ---
    But! But!
[06:14] ---
    If you've made up your mind,
    then it cannot be helped.
[06:16] ---
    What?
[06:17] ---
    I shall inform the Miss.
[06:20] ---
    Wait! There may be some sense
    to what the Miss says, too!
[06:23] ---
    Dreaming of retirement...
[06:24] ---
    It seems I have become less than
    dedicated without realizing it!
[06:27] ---
    I am thinking of going back to my days
[06:29] ---
    when I was a footman aspiring
    to become a butler!
[06:31] ---
    A footman?
[06:32] ---
    Footmen are people who work under butlers.
[06:36] ---
    Incidentally, there are no footmen
    in the Sanzenin household.
[06:39] ---
    As a footman, I challenge Hayate
    Ayasaki to a serving-the-Miss match!
[06:44] ---
    What a way to stack the
    odds against yourself.
[06:46] ---
    Damn! Butting in needlessly!
[06:48] ---
    I was almost on my way to
    Brazil, just as I'd planned!
[06:54] ---
    A-A serving-the-Miss match?
[06:57] ---
    I don't recall asking you to
    do anything so bothersome.
[07:00] ---
    It was Mr. Klaus who suggested it, so...
[07:03] ---
    You have certainly grown a lot
    in a short amount of time, boy.
[07:07] ---
    However, you have one fatal flaw!
[07:10] ---
    Wh-What about me is...
[07:12] ---
    Maybe it's how you look too
    good when you cross-dress.
[07:14] ---
    Now, now.
[07:15] ---
    Boy, a butler is ultimately
    his mistress's shadow.
[07:19] ---
    You are too aware of
    yourself as a protagonist!
[07:21] ---
    But he is actually the protagonist,
    so it can't be helped.
[07:24] ---
    In fact, he is rather unassuming
    for a protagonist...
[07:27] ---
    Is that supposed to be a compliment?
[07:30] ---
    A-At any rate, for the next 24 hours,
[07:32] ---
    we will wield our skills as butlers
    to the utmost to serve Miss Nagi!
[07:36] ---
    In the unlikely event that my service
    is less satisfactory than the boy's,
[07:40] ---
    I will leave the estate!
[07:42] ---
    What?!
[07:45] ---
    Y-Yes, sir!
[07:46] ---
    I will compete with all my might,
    so as not to insult the Head Butler!
[07:55] ---
    And thus, the serve-the-Miss match began.
[07:59] ---
    Boy, do you know what the most essential
    skill is for a butler to have?
[08:06] ---
    Well, like starting out hated,
[08:08] ---
    but being thought of as a nice
    person by the final episode?
[08:10] ---
    Or swapping places with
    one's mistress by chance
[08:12] ---
    and ending up solving the case?
[08:14] ---
    No!
[08:15] ---
    To be inspired enough to
    anticipate what's to come!
[08:18] ---
    You need the ability to
    read multiple steps ahead
[08:19] ---
    to anticipate what your mistress desires!
[08:24] ---
    For the nobility, the morning
    begins with tea upon waking up!
[08:27] ---
    Oh, if it's that, I already prepared it.
[08:29] ---
    What?
[08:31] ---
    Ah!
[08:32] ---
    What?!
[08:33] ---
    It is ready, Miss.
[08:34] ---
    Thank you, Hayate.
[08:36] ---
    Y-You fool!
[08:37] ---
    In England, the land of butlers,
    this is a duty that is so important
[08:40] ---
    that there is a role specially
    dedicated to making tea!
[08:43] ---
    If you do not even know how to
    properly make tea, you are no butler!
[08:47] ---
    These are technically tea bags made for
    the British Royal Household, though...
[08:51] ---
    What?!
[08:52] ---
    Ah! That sounds good!
[08:54] ---
    Lemon or cream? Which would you like?
[08:58] ---
    Listen here! Back in England, there
    is no such thing as lemon tea!
[09:02] ---
    Only milk tea exquisitely
    prepared by the butler
[09:05] ---
    serves to bolster the start of every day!
[09:07] ---
    Then I'll go with lemon.
[09:11] ---
    The lemon tea you made is good, Hayate.
[09:14] ---
    Thank you very much.
[09:15] ---
    Th-This can't be...
[09:16] ---
    Nagi, please try to go a little easy on him.
[09:20] ---
    It's wrong...
[09:22] ---
    It's just wrong. Just wrong...
[09:27] ---
    So you are going to school today, Miss?
[09:30] ---
    Yes, because it would be mean
    to mess with Klaus too much.
[09:33] ---
    I see. But why?
[09:36] ---
    It may not look it, but
    Klaus and I go way back.
[09:39] ---
    The fact that we know each other well
[09:41] ---
    is precisely what makes
    it worth messing with him.
[09:49] ---
    Ah! Right now, I can get two
    extra pieces with the bucket!
[09:53] ---
    And it comes with nuggets to boot!
[09:57] ---
    I-I wonder if they ran out of chicken...
[10:06] ---
    It looks like he didn't
    follow us all the way here.
[10:09] ---
    So it appears.
[10:10] ---
    You there!
[10:11] ---
    Keep it down!
[10:14] ---
    Miss!
[10:22] ---
    Th-That's a piece of finely
    polished silverware!
[10:25] ---
    That is the symbol of a first-rate butler!
[10:29] ---
    Zvaaaaam!!
[10:31] ---
    Boy! I have quit being a human being!
[10:34] ---
    Mr. Klaus!
[10:35] ---
    Y-You're a Sanzenin household butler!
[10:42] ---
    The word "butler" comes from one
    who oversees the wine collection,
[10:45] ---
    a permutation of "bouteillier"!
[10:48] ---
    Wine! Vintage wine!
[10:52] ---
    Violet Overdrive!
[10:54] ---
    Damn!
[10:55] ---
    Bordeaux! Burgundy!
[10:57] ---
    I have no wine for a drunkard!
[10:59] ---
    Kraaaash!
[11:01] ---
    Stop right there!
[11:02] ---
    They're both gone...
[11:04] ---
    Yeah...
[11:08] ---
    On sunny days like this,
    playing hooky is the best!
[11:12] ---
    It's even more relaxing when I think
    of how everyone else is studying.
[11:18] ---
    Now, if only we had a butler to make
    us some tea, it would be perfect.
[11:22] ---
    Sunlight Yellow Overdrive!
[11:30] ---
    Switching places?!
[11:32] ---
    Negoro Butler Ninja Skill, the
    Switching Places Technique.
[11:34] ---
    That was an unexpected nuisance.
[11:37] ---
    Now, then...
[11:38] ---
    M-My chronic back problem...
[11:44] ---
    Oh! That's Nagi's head butler!
[11:50] ---
    I'm looking for a perch.
    (Tomari-gi o sagashite imasu.)
[11:55] ---
    A bittersweet memory.
    (Suppai omoide daze.)
[11:59] ---
    What the?! Holy cow!
[12:01] ---
    This is super first rate cake and tea!
[12:04] ---
    Much appreciated!
[12:05] ---
    I owe you my life, so I
    wanted you to enjoy it.
[12:09] ---
    Thank you! Let's dig in!
[12:13] ---
    "Thank you," huh?
[12:15] ---
    A butler is his mistress's shadow,
[12:17] ---
    but deep inside, he is always waiting
    for that one word of thanks.
[12:22] ---
    This is better than the ones from
    the shop by the train station!
[12:24] ---
    And this tea has been poured exquisitely.
[12:27] ---
    Just lovely!
[12:27] ---
    I've found you!
[12:29] ---
    Katsy!
[12:30] ---
    Yukiji!
[12:30] ---
    We have a really good reason for this!
[12:32] ---
    I don't care about any of that!
[12:33] ---
    Treat me, too!
[12:36] ---
    Huh?
[12:37] ---
    What on Earth are you going on about?
[12:40] ---
    Play dumb, will you?!
[12:41] ---
    You've got vintage stuff, don't you?!
[12:43] ---
    Yukiji, you seem to be out for blood.
[12:45] ---
    Sis! What are you doing being
    so violent towards the elderly?!
[12:48] ---
    The elderly?!
[12:50] ---
    After all, he came falling
    out of the sky just earlier.
[12:52] ---
    He's a grandpa, and who knows when
    something might happen to him.
[12:55] ---
    RIP.
[12:56] ---
    Well, sure, but...
[13:00] ---
    M-Mr. Klaus?
[13:04] ---
    Just how far could they have gone?
[13:06] ---
    Well, Klaus has probably recovered by now.
[13:11] ---
    Mr. Klaus!
[13:19] ---
    Oh? Here I was wondering who you might be,
[13:22] ---
    but if it isn't the renowned
    Mr. Klaus of the butler world.
[13:26] ---
    Judging by your appearance, you are
    a butler of the Ohkouchi household.
[13:29] ---
    My name is Himuro Saeki.
[13:31] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
[13:32] ---
    And this is Little Master Taiga.
[13:34] ---
    I will pretend I did not hear that last part.
[13:37] ---
    What?
[13:38] ---
    Butlers have long considered it an honor
[13:40] ---
    to be called by their master's name.
[13:42] ---
    You are an Ohkouchi butler and
    you do not even know that?!
[13:46] ---
    Wow, I had no idea, Himuro.
[13:49] ---
    Little Master! Petals!
[13:50] ---
    Oh! R-Right!
[13:52] ---
    To think you would cite an Edwardian
    custom in our Heisei Era!
[13:56] ---
    It is so difficult to see.
[13:58] ---
    The sight of a formerly great
    butler in his declining years.
[14:01] ---
    Wha?!
[14:02] ---
    It is sad that even as you
    have grown feeble with age,
[14:04] ---
    you still cling to your position.
[14:11] ---
    Th-That was awesome, Himuro!
[14:13] ---
    With reflexes like that,
[14:15] ---
    you will not be able to protect your
    mistress in her time of need, you know.
[14:19] ---
    Perhaps you should retire and
    think about living your own life.
[14:25] ---
    You are young, Ohkouchi butler.
[14:27] ---
    What?
[14:29] ---
    I am my mistress's shadow.
[14:31] ---
    Shadows never have their own
    private lives to begin with!
[14:34] ---
    If I see that I can no longer
    be of use to my mistress,
[14:37] ---
    all that is left is for me
    to merely disappear quietly.
[14:46] ---
    Don't tell me...
[14:47] ---
    ...he just found his resolve to step down?!
[14:50] ---
    No way!
[14:57] ---
    Is he serious?
[15:00] ---
    Is there no way for us
    to keep Mr. Klaus here?
[15:03] ---
    We do have a trump card for that.
[15:05] ---
    Really?!
[15:06] ---
    Yes.
[15:08] ---
    However, it will require
    you to lend a helping body.
[15:12] ---
    Oh, please. That would
    be "lend a helping hand".
[15:18] ---
    I-I have a bad feeling about this.
[15:26] ---
    Ah, I have such fond memories of everything.
[15:29] ---
    My life's purpose was to be
    with the Sanzenin household
[15:33] ---
    and to live out my days here.
[15:36] ---
    But what the young Ohkouchi
    butler said had some merit, too.
[15:41] ---
    Perhaps it is high time I ended this...
[15:47] ---
    Mr. Klaus.
[15:59] ---
    I-I have met you somewhere before!
[16:06] ---
    You are the sweet lady I saw in the garden!
[16:09] ---
    This was a good idea, if I do say so myself!
[16:11] ---
    Hayate's unique allure when dressed
    in women's clothes would be effective
[16:14] ---
    even in the gay town of Ni-chome, Shinjuku.
[16:17] ---
    Even Mr. Klaus will surely
    find comfort in this.
[16:20] ---
    Wh-What is your name?
[16:22] ---
    Ayasaki...
[16:24] ---
    Ayasaki?
[16:26] ---
    Oh! It's H-H-H-Hermione!
[16:28] ---
    Ah! Hermione!
[16:30] ---
    What a fantastic name! Like the
    name of someone who can use magic!
[16:35] ---
    Y-Yes.
[16:37] ---
    The truth is, I am a goddess, who
    lives in the estate's Yashagaike Pond.
[16:41] ---
    Ah! I knew that you could
    not be an ordinary lady!
[16:48] ---
    Mr. Klaus,
[16:50] ---
    I have been watching you all this
    time from the bottom of the pond.
[16:53] ---
    H-Have you really?!
[16:55] ---
    You must not quit being the head butler.
[16:57] ---
    You are still far too young for that.
[17:02] ---
    What is the matter?
[17:03] ---
    I have grown weak with old age and
    even my hair is completely white.
[17:07] ---
    That is not true.
[17:09] ---
    You are a fine gentleman with graying hair!
[17:13] ---
    I-I am, aren't I?!
[17:14] ---
    I get that a lot at the adult
    social club in Ikebukuro!
[17:17] ---
    So you will no longer say
    you will retire, right?!
[17:20] ---
    But lately, I can barely lift my
    arms because of my old shoulders...
[17:24] ---
    Y-You're just a little
    stiff, that's all. See?
[17:31] ---
    Look at how stiff you are!
[17:34] ---
    Stiff!
[17:36] ---
    Please do my upper and lower back as well.
[17:38] ---
    Certainly!
[17:40] ---
    Oh, there. Right there. That's the spot.
[17:44] ---
    Please hurry up and get convinced!
[17:45] ---
    You difficult bow-tied old man!
[17:50] ---
    Who the hell is Klaus talking to?
[17:53] ---
    Further that way!
[17:55] ---
    No, we cannot go there.
[17:56] ---
    T-Time for a tasty treat!
[18:01] ---
    Hermione, th-the truth is...
[18:04] ---
    Honey!
[18:10] ---
    To think I have grown senile
    enough to be seeing things...
[18:13] ---
    It backfired...
[18:17] ---
    This tiger again!
[18:20] ---
    Brazil Overseas Trips for Seniors
[18:21] ---
    What's this?
[18:29] ---
    Forgive me, man!
[18:30] ---
    Tama, don't tell me you did
    this for a female tiger?!
[18:33] ---
    I've fallen in love with that female tiger!
[18:37] ---
    But I'm a tiger, so I can't
    get to Brazil all on my own!
[18:40] ---
    And so you used Mr. Klaus?
[18:43] ---
    You want to go to the plantation in Brazil.
[18:45] ---
    You want to go. You want to go!
[18:49] ---
    I just whispered that to him!
[18:51] ---
    I'll tell you one thing.
[18:52] ---
    Huh?!
[18:55] ---
    There are no tigers in Brazil!
[18:57] ---
    What?!
[19:02] ---
    I know!
[19:03] ---
    If I tell Mr. Klaus that
    his dream about Brazil
[19:05] ---
    wasn't the product of his subconscious,
[19:07] ---
    but that it was Tama's underhanded plot...!
[19:12] ---
    No, I can't say that.
[19:13] ---
    I'd forgotten that no one
    knows that Tama can talk...
[19:56] ---
    Klaus!
[19:57] ---
    What's the flower language for this flower?
[20:00] ---
    Miss, it is loyalty to you.
[20:03] ---
    Really?!
[20:04] ---
    Yes, I just made it so.
[20:11] ---
    This is for you!
[20:16] ---
    Miss Nagi!
[20:24] ---
    Mr. Klaus.
[20:26] ---
    Mr. Klaus.
[20:28] ---
    It no longer matters, boy.
[20:31] ---
    There is nothing that I can do
    that you are not capable of.
[20:33] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[20:35] ---
    Miss Nagi!
[20:37] ---
    This morning's Butler
    Economy Marketing Journal
[20:39] ---
    is soaked from the morning dew!
[20:42] ---
    I can't read the stock market news!
[20:47] ---
    Head Butler.
[20:49] ---
    You have yet to teach me
    how to iron the newspaper.
[20:53] ---
    Boy!
[20:54] ---
    If you can't even iron the newspaper,
    the winner of the match is Klaus.
[20:58] ---
    Miss!
[21:01] ---
    Come on, Klaus!
[21:07] ---
    It seems I have no choice.
[21:16] ---
    A good temperature!
[21:20] ---
    It seems Mr. Klaus has completely recovered.
[21:23] ---
    Yes.
[21:24] ---
    We owe it all to you, Miss.
[21:26] ---
    He may not be much, but he is a
    part of the Sanzenin household.
[21:28] ---
    I would not wake up feeling
    good if I had driven him away!
[21:34] ---
    Shall we go make some lemon tea?
[21:36] ---
    That is a good idea.
[21:45] ---
    Next time, they will not fight,
[21:47] ---
    but instead, aim to coexist
    with small animals.
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:06] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:37] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:05] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    Wataru & Saki's
[23:26] ---
    Wataru and...
[23:27] ---
    Saki's...
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report!
[23:29] ---
    With the sunny smile and the boyish charm,
[23:31] ---
    I'm the manager of Rental Video
    Tachibana, Wataru Tachibana!
[23:34] ---
    And I help take care of him.
[23:36] ---
    I'm the maid, Saki Kijima.
[23:37] ---
    Now that the image song is ready to go,
[23:39] ---
    maybe we should make some
    promotional merchandise!
[23:42] ---
    What do you think would sell well?
[23:44] ---
    How about a rare glimpse
    at Rental Video Tachibana's
[23:46] ---
    clutzy maid in a pleasingly
    embarassing situation?
[23:48] ---
    What do you think? You have been
    attracting more customers, lately.
[23:52] ---
    Young sir, would you please stop it?!
[23:54] ---
    Tachibana!
SIGN    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Hayate, what kind of girl
    would you say is your type?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Uh, good question...
[24:01] ---
    I think I like normal girls the best.
[24:04] ---
    "Normal"?
[24:04] ---
    I'm not sure you'd understand, miss...
[24:07] ---
    How dare you?! Do you think I
    can't become your ideal girl!?
[24:12] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:13] ---
    "I Want to Go Back to Being an Ordinary Girl,
     But Buy My Character Songs, Okay?"
[24:13] ---
    I Want to Go Back to Being an Ordinary Girl,
     But Buy My Character Songs, Okay?
[24:16] ---
    
[24:16] ---
    I see! So, Hayate likes normal girls...
[24:19] ---
    Did you know the lion statues in
    front of certain apartment buildings
[24:22] ---
    are called "shiisa" in Okinawa?
[24:25] ---
    

37 - I Want to Go Back to Being an Ordinary Girl, But Buy My Character Songs, Okay?

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:29] ---
    Where am I?
[00:31] ---
    You're finally awake!
[00:33] ---
    It's past 9 already!
[00:34] ---
    Hurry up and go wash your
    face. Breakfast's ready.
[00:39] ---
    Oh, right, I stayed the night
    over at the hamster's place.
[00:44] ---
    Right, right.
[00:46] ---
    Don't go back to sleep!
[00:47] ---
    Hey, what are you doing?!
[00:49] ---
    If you don't get up already,
    you're gonna get this!
[00:53] ---
    Here we go!
[00:54] ---
    Take that! Is that the spot?!
[00:55] ---
    You meanie! Stop this!
[00:57] ---
    Does that hit the spot?!
[01:00] ---
    Whosoever commands the
    butlers, commands the world!
[01:03] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[01:08] ---
    Ah! Hayate! It's me.
[01:11] ---
    Yes, I will be coming home now.
[01:15] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:18] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:20] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:26] ---
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[01:31] ---
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[01:37] ---
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[01:42] ---
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[01:48] ---
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[01:53] ---
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[01:58] ---
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[02:04] ---
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[02:09] ---
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[02:12] ---
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:15] ---
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:20] ---
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:23] ---
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:26] ---
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[02:45] ---
    I Want to Go Back to Being an Ordinary Girl,
     But Buy My Character Songs, Okay?
[02:50] ---
    WHAT?!
[02:53] ---
    What is the matter, Miss?!
[02:55] ---
    Wait... What?
[02:57] ---
    Hayate!
[02:58] ---
    Yes?
[02:59] ---
    What kind of girl do you prefer?!
[03:02] ---
    Pardon?
SIGN    Special Feature 2
    Good-looking Guys
[03:05] ---
    Special Feature 1
    Popular Girls
[03:06] ---
    I-It's not that I'm doubting
    your feelings for me.
[03:10] ---
    It's just... How to put this?
    I'm checking, just in case.
[03:13] ---
    "Romantic Fortune for Sagittarius."
[03:16] ---
    What are you looking at?!
[03:17] ---
    "Signs point to an impending crisis.
[03:19] ---
    "Your partner may be getting
    tired of your spoiled ways.
[03:22] ---
    "Pay more attention to
    what your partner likes."
[03:25] ---
    Is that what's bothering you?
[03:26] ---
    Maria!
[03:28] ---
    I swear!
[03:29] ---
    Darn it! Answer me, Hayate! What
    kind of girl do you prefer?!
[03:33] ---
    What? Um...
[03:35] ---
    What do you consider to be
    the ideal married life?!
[03:39] ---
    What comes first? Dinner or a bath or me?!
[03:41] ---
    How many kids do you want?!
[03:42] ---
    Th-That's so many questions at once...
[03:45] ---
    Why can't you answer me?!
[03:47] ---
    I won't forgive you if
    you hide things from me!
[03:49] ---
    P-Please!
[03:51] ---
    Fielding such spoiled demands, you
    must find it so tiresome, Hayate.
[03:55] ---
    What?
[03:57] ---
    N-No, not at all...
[04:00] ---
    Let me think... My preference...
[04:03] ---
    Your preference is?
[04:04] ---
    In the end, I like ordinary girls.
[04:07] ---
    O-Ordinary?
[04:08] ---
    Yes. I think being ordinary
    is extremely precious.
[04:11] ---
    No parents shackling me
    with a debt of 150 million.
[04:14] ---
    No being targeted by "very generous people".
[04:16] ---
    To marry an ordinary person
    and have an ordinary family...
[04:19] ---
    I have thoughts along those lines...
[04:21] ---
    Ordinary?
[04:22] ---
    I think your life up to now has
    been too far out of the ordinary.
[04:27] ---
    Ordinary...
[04:28] ---
    Well, I'm sure someone like
    you wouldn't understand, Miss.
[04:32] ---
    What?
[04:34] ---
    What did you just say?!
[04:36] ---
    Huh?
[04:36] ---
    As I said, someone like you wouldn't...
[04:39] ---
    You fool!
[04:41] ---
    Oh, Nagi!
[04:44] ---
    D-Did I say something that angered her?
[04:48] ---
    Yes, though I doubt someone
    like you could understand.
[04:56] ---
    Make a fool of me, will he?!
[04:58] ---
    Is he saying I could
    never be his ideal girl?!
[05:02] ---
    All right, since it's come to this...!
[05:05] ---
    What?!
[05:07] ---
    The Miss has run away from home again?!
[05:09] ---
    Yes, I just received a call
    from members of the SP unit.
[05:13] ---
    This is troubling.
[05:15] ---
    What could her reason be
    for running away this time?
[05:19] ---
    *You're always the reason, you know... *
[05:26] ---
    Welcome!
[05:28] ---
    Thanks a lot!
[05:30] ---
    If I hang around places like
    this, can I attain the ordinary?
[05:33] ---
    But this is a bit...
[05:36] ---
    Oh, pull yourself together, Nagi Sanzenin!
[05:40] ---
    I have to master being ordinary,
    no matter what it takes,
[05:42] ---
    and become Hayate's ideal girl!
[05:45] ---
    I'm absolutely not going home until I do!
[05:47] ---
    Now, come and get me,
    ordinary! I'm your opponent!
[05:53] ---
    There it is! Ordinary!
[05:55] ---
    Huh?
[05:56] ---
    I found it! I-I-I found ordinary!
[05:59] ---
    What are you doing here, Little Sanzenin?
[06:01] ---
    Ayumu Nishizawa.
SIGN    Ayumu Nishizawa
[06:04] ---
    She freely wields the ordinary
    under any and all circumstances.
SIGN    Alignment: Ordinary
SIGN    Race: Ordinary
[06:07] ---
    The most ordinary life form
    in "Hayate the Combat Butler"!
SIGN    Ability: Ordinary
SIGN    Ordinary
SIGN    Ordinary
[06:12] ---
    What's that supposed to mean?!
    Excuse me for being ordinary!
[06:15] ---
    Yeah, seriously!
[06:16] ---
    What?!
[06:17] ---
    Of all people, you being
    ordinary is a problem.
[06:20] ---
    What is this?! You're not making any sense!
[06:22] ---
    What's a mere hamster doing here anyway?!
[06:26] ---
    I'm free to go wherever I choose, aren't I?!
[06:28] ---
    Or rather, quit calling me "hamster" already!
[06:31] ---
    Humph!
[06:32] ---
    Oh!
[06:35] ---
    *That's it! *
[06:36] ---
    *If I observe her, I may be
    able to master the ordinary! *
[06:40] ---
    Honestly! What was that all about anyway?
[06:45] ---
    Stare!
[06:47] ---
    Hey! Why are you following me?!
[06:50] ---
    Do you have some problem with being followed?
[06:52] ---
    I do! I'm about to go shopping!
[06:55] ---
    That's perfect!
[06:56] ---
    I wanted to see what
    ordinary shopping is like!
[06:59] ---
    Huh?
[07:01] ---
    Wh-Why does it end up like this?
[07:06] ---
    Ah! So this is a station!
[07:09] ---
    I know about these! This is where
    you get on and off trains, right?
[07:13] ---
    I'd seen them in mangas, but I
    never imagined that they were real.
[07:16] ---
    *Oh, man. Does she really mean to follow me? *
[07:19] ---
    All right!
[07:30] ---
    I'm being bullied!
[07:32] ---
    I am being bullied by the station!
[07:34] ---
    I'm against bullying!
[07:36] ---
    Just because I'm not ordinary!
[07:37] ---
    I'm against discrimination!
[07:39] ---
    You can go in if you pay.
[07:46] ---
    Honestly! Why did I have to buy her a ticket?
[07:50] ---
    Now! We will finally be
    boarding a train, won't we?!
[08:05] ---
    Oh, you perv!
[08:07] ---
    Impossible!
[08:09] ---
    I cannot get on it!
[08:11] ---
    Is it ordinary to get on board
    at those kinds of speeds?
[08:14] ---
    Huh?!
[08:15] ---
    Th-That was a super-express!
    Ordinary trains will come by, too!
[08:19] ---
    What?! Then that wasn't ordinary?!
[08:22] ---
    What the heck...
[08:29] ---
    Wow!
[08:31] ---
    Look! The scenery is scrolling
    sideways and it's just flying by!
[08:36] ---
    Hey, where's the driver's seat?
[08:38] ---
    I want to try driving it, too.
[08:39] ---
    What?!
[08:40] ---
    There's no way you can do that!
[08:43] ---
    This isn't some video game!
[08:45] ---
    Oh, you can't? I'm good at the
    "Pop by Train" game, though.
[08:53] ---
    H-Hey...
[08:55] ---
    Huh?
[08:57] ---
    What's wrong?
[08:59] ---
    Everyone is sitting on my
    seat without my permission.
[09:02] ---
    Huh?!
[09:03] ---
    Of course, they are! This
    seat isn't just for us!
[09:07] ---
    What?! It's not?!
[09:09] ---
    No way! You don't even know stuff like that?!
[09:12] ---
    Oh, please! I mean, ordinarily,
    that's common sense!
[09:15] ---
    D-Don't talk about everything being
    ordinary, like you're proud of it!
[09:32] ---
    You know, I've been wondering
    about this for a while now,
[09:35] ---
    but why are you so hung
    up on what's ordinary?
[09:37] ---
    It's none of your business!
[09:39] ---
    But you're the one who
    attached yourself to me!
[09:44] ---
    Come on, hurry!
[09:47] ---
    What? We're going to walk that far?
[09:50] ---
    That's right. The store's
    about 500 meters from here.
[09:54] ---
    Why didn't we go all the
    way there on the train?
[09:57] ---
    Don't be ridiculous!
[10:01] ---
    Wh-What's this?
[10:03] ---
    Everyone's lined up!
[10:03] ---
    I'd like 3.
[10:05] ---
    Oh, excuse me!
[10:06] ---
    Yes?
[10:07] ---
    Is Koyuki's ultimate seafood
    cake still available?
[10:09] ---
    Yes, you're still fine.
[10:11] ---
    All right! Talk about lucky!
[10:13] ---
    Could this be what they call "the line"?!
[10:15] ---
    The thing that always
    appears on the release date
[10:18] ---
    of new video games and
    limited anime merchandise?!
[10:20] ---
    Yup! It's a super popular cake
    and they only make 50 every day.
[10:24] ---
    Today, my parents and little
    brother are gone on a trip,
[10:27] ---
    so I'm going to totally enjoy
    the cake all by myself!
[10:31] ---
    Oh, I'm not sharing any of it with you.
[10:33] ---
    I don't want any.
[10:34] ---
    Being ordinary means wanting
    awfully stupid things, doesn't it?
[10:37] ---
    I'm absolutely not sharing it!
[10:42] ---
    Hey, it's not moving at all.
[10:44] ---
    Patience. Patience.
[10:45] ---
    Things taste especially good when
    you have to wait a long time.
[10:49] ---
    Wait. Huh?
[10:50] ---
    Wh-Where could she have gone?
[10:53] ---
    Hey! Hamster!
[10:56] ---
    Over here!
[10:57] ---
    Honestly! What do you want?!
[11:00] ---
    Rejoice!
[11:00] ---
    I was able to buy their limited
    product without getting in line.
[11:05] ---
    Thank you very much for your purchase.
[11:07] ---
    The 3-piece limited edition 18-karat
    gold XPS360 comes to 5 million yen.
[11:12] ---
    I-I do not want it!
[11:14] ---
    What?!
[11:18] ---
    I'll take it all!
    (Zenbu kure!)
[11:22] ---
    It's Mister Rerere!
    (Rerere no ojisan da!)
[11:24] ---
    What?
[11:28] ---
    H-Hayate, how about getting a
    photo booth sticker together?
[11:31] ---
    What?!
[11:33] ---
    Ooh, she said it!
[11:34] ---
    Ayumu, hang in there!
[11:36] ---
    Uh, but I have to go to work now.
[11:39] ---
    It won't take long! So, come
    on! You know, in commemoration!
[11:42] ---
    Okay? Okay? Okay?
[11:43] ---
    In commemoration? Of what?
[11:45] ---
    Uh, um...
[11:47] ---
    To commemorate you going to work...?
[11:49] ---
    Huh?
[11:50] ---
    Anyway, just one! I only want one!
[11:50] ---
    Whoa, Miss Nishizawa!
[11:55] ---
    The ultimate seafood cake is sold out.
[12:00] ---
    The limited cake...
[12:02] ---
    Now, don't be so disappointed.
[12:03] ---
    Hey, whose fault do you think this is?!
[12:16] ---
    In the end, I was only able to
    get the leftover cream puffs.
[12:19] ---
    This is what happens to you
[12:21] ---
    when you try to do things
    that you normally don't do.
[12:23] ---
    After all the trouble I've gone
    to learn the ordinary, too.
[12:26] ---
    This won't serve as any
    kind of reference now.
[12:28] ---
    Why is it that everything you
    say has to be so spiteful?
[12:32] ---
    Sheesh! I'm having your
    family come pick you up.
[12:36] ---
    Tell me your phone number.
[12:41] ---
    What is that?!
[12:43] ---
    Hey, no peeking at my photo booth stickers!
[12:46] ---
    You! This is unforgivable!
[12:47] ---
    When in the world did you get
    something like that with Hayate?!
[12:50] ---
    Grin.
[12:52] ---
    Hehe, are you jealous?
[12:54] ---
    This photo booth sticker is
    a memento for Hayate and me.
[12:57] ---
    I-I have something, too!
[12:59] ---
    Can't tell you!
[13:01] ---
    Look!
[13:01] ---
    I have Hayate's number at
    the top of my address book!
SIGN    Address Book
    Hayate Ayasaki
[13:05] ---
    Wait, you have your own cell phone!
[13:08] ---
    I won't tell you his number, hamster.
[13:11] ---
    How about it? Jealous much?
[13:13] ---
    I think I might be a bit jealous!
[13:17] ---
    Since we're here, I'm going
    to make it clear to you!
[13:19] ---
    Hayate belongs to me, all right?!
[13:22] ---
    What?!
[13:23] ---
    Even if you're super ordinary, on
    the order of being a World Heritage,
[13:26] ---
    that's one fact that's never going to change!
[13:28] ---
    H-Hah!
[13:30] ---
    I bet he'll get tired of a
    spoiled rich girl like you
[13:32] ---
    and he'll leave you soon enough!
[13:40] ---
    I-I'm not following you anywhere anymore!
[13:44] ---
    Hurry up and get lost!
[13:46] ---
    J-Just who do you think you are?!
[13:48] ---
    You were bothering me to begin with anyway!
[13:58] ---
    Come on.
[14:01] ---
    I'll walk you home.
[14:03] ---
    Leave me alone!
[14:04] ---
    You could listen to me a little!
[14:08] ---
    Ow!
[14:11] ---
    You have blisters!
[14:12] ---
    That's for walking all over the
    place when you're not used to it!
[14:15] ---
    I told you to leave me alone!
[14:17] ---
    You should call home and have
    someone come pick you up.
[14:20] ---
    I'm absolutely not going home
    until I've mastered the ordinary!
[14:25] ---
    Then, do you want to come to my place?
[14:28] ---
    I live nearby.
[14:30] ---
    I know I mentioned this earlier,
    but no one's home today,
[14:33] ---
    so you can come over for now.
[14:45] ---
    No helping it then.
[14:46] ---
    If you insist, then I'll keep you company.
[14:48] ---
    Oh, you're so stubborn!
[14:53] ---
    Wow!
[14:57] ---
    Sorry for the wait. Here you are.
[15:00] ---
    Th-Thank you.
[15:06] ---
    Tasty, isn't it?
[15:12] ---
    I-I'm sorry about earlier.
[15:15] ---
    You missed buying the cake because of me...
[15:20] ---
    I'm a bit surprised.
[15:21] ---
    What?
[15:22] ---
    I guess you do know how to properly
    say "thank you" and "I'm sorry".
[15:27] ---
    D-Don't mock me!
[15:29] ---
    Even I know how to say such things.
[15:34] ---
    This is good.
[15:35] ---
    Right?! They cost 200 yen a piece!
[15:39] ---
    Oh, it's that cheap?
[15:42] ---
    What?!
[15:43] ---
    But I don't know how you can
    live in such cramped quarters.
[15:46] ---
    I totally understand how figurines
    must feel in their showcases now.
[15:49] ---
    I-Is that what you say to a person
    after you ate their cream puff?!
[15:53] ---
    All right! Next, I'll
    have you serve me dinner!
[15:56] ---
    Keep bringing on the ordinary!
[15:59] ---
    She's totally unrepentant...
[16:03] ---
    Wow! So this is an ordinary dinner!
[16:06] ---
    It's all frozen food, though.
[16:13] ---
    What the heck?
[16:15] ---
    Huh?
[16:15] ---
    Everything's on a far smaller scale,
[16:18] ---
    but "ordinary" is not so different
    from what I normally do.
[16:22] ---
    I see.
[16:35] ---
    You know, if you weren't super rich,
    you'd be a pretty ordinary girl, too.
[16:41] ---
    Me? An ordinary girl?
[16:43] ---
    I mean, you're stubborn and you hate to lose.
[16:46] ---
    Wh-What was that?!
[16:47] ---
    You get all worked up about the guy you like,
[16:50] ---
    but the way you do it can be a bit cute, too.
[16:55] ---
    You're a very ordinary girl.
[17:03] ---
    That's right!
[17:05] ---
    I'm an ordinary girl!
[17:07] ---
    But Hayate just doesn't get it at all!
[17:10] ---
    Hayate doesn't?
[17:13] ---
    Huh, so that's why you were so
    hung up about being ordinary.
[17:16] ---
    That's exactly right.
[17:18] ---
    I see! So Hayate likes ordinary girls!
[17:22] ---
    I'm not going to lose!
[17:24] ---
    Huh?
[17:25] ---
    No matter what past you
    might share with Hayate,
[17:28] ---
    my bond with him will never waver
    over a measly photo like that!
[17:32] ---
    Huh? Photo? You mean,
    the photo booth sticker?
[17:35] ---
    Huh?
[17:36] ---
    Oh, please. There's no way there's
    anything so deep behind that thing.
[17:40] ---
    Huh?!
[17:43] ---
    What the heck?
[17:45] ---
    Your story was almost shockingly devoid
    of anything surprising or moving.
[17:48] ---
    It certainly shows what a master
    of the ordinary you are.
[17:51] ---
    Ooh! The way you said that just bugs me!
[17:54] ---
    It was a compliment, you
    know. You should be happy.
[17:58] ---
    This is my room.
[18:00] ---
    You can use the bed. I'll
    sleep in the living room.
[18:04] ---
    Well, good night.
[18:05] ---
    Hey!
[18:07] ---
    Huh?
[18:08] ---
    Uh, no, I mean...
[18:10] ---
    I-I wouldn't mind sleeping with you.
[18:14] ---
    I-I-I just thought you might
    be scared to sleep by yourself.
[18:18] ---
    I-I don't really care either way.
[18:24] ---
    Then, shall we sleep together?
[18:27] ---
    Yeah!
[18:29] ---
    Oh, also...
[18:30] ---
    Huh?
[18:34] ---
    Inform Hayate that I will
    be staying the night here.
[18:37] ---
    What?!
[18:39] ---
    Just this once! You hear me?!
[18:41] ---
    O-O-Okay!
[18:47] ---
    Oh, H-Hayate? It's me, Ayumu Nishizawa.
[18:51] ---
    Um, uh...
[18:53] ---
    Yeah, it's been a long time.
[18:57] ---
    Wait!
[18:58] ---
    Huh?
[18:59] ---
    D-D-Don't turn that off.
[19:02] ---
    All right.
[19:03] ---
    Good night, Little Sanzenin.
[19:05] ---
    "Nagi" is fine.
[19:09] ---
    Good night, Little Nagi.
[19:11] ---
    Good night, hamster.
[19:13] ---
    Wha?!
[19:14] ---
    *And thus, the night wore
    on for the dreaming girls. *
[19:18] ---
    Now, next time, the butler battles
    will finally reach a climax!
[19:22] ---
    *They will fight and fight and fight
    their crazy, crazy, crazy hearts out! *
[19:26] ---
    Incidentally...
[19:27] ---
    Is that right?
[19:29] ---
    Yes, I understand.
[19:31] ---
    Then please take good care of
    the Miss for me, Miss Nishizawa.
[19:37] ---
    *Hayate had almost no screen
    time in this episode, *
[19:41] ---
    *so why is he here with no
    events leading up to it? *
[19:44] ---
    *On the contrary, he actually
    had his screen time. *
[19:52] ---
    See? Right there.
[19:55] ---
    And see? There as well.
[20:01] ---
    And he was even here.
[20:06] ---
    Hurry it up, will you?
[20:08] ---
    Oh, pardon me.
[20:11] ---
    *Always ready to save Miss Nagi from danger, *
[20:14] ---
    *he made sure to stalk her. *
[20:16] ---
    Correction. He was making sure to
    tail her, s, t, u, v, w, x, y, z.
[20:24] ---
    *It seems there's no longer a need for
    me to help the Miss and her friend. *
[20:28] ---
    My dear Hayate!
[20:31] ---
    Over here, my dear Hayate!
[20:34] ---
    Isumi?!
[20:35] ---
    What are you doing there?!
[20:37] ---
    I was taking a stroll in
    my yard when I got lost
[20:40] ---
    and before I knew it, I
    found myself in this place!
[20:44] ---
    Please hold on! I am coming to help you!
[20:46] ---
    Please hurry, my dear Hayate!
[20:49] ---
    Please don't panic, Isumi!
[20:50] ---
    Wait for me, Isumi!
[20:52] ---
    W-Wataru!
[20:54] ---
    Young Sir, it's dangerous to climb up there!
[20:57] ---
    I am coming to help you!
[21:03] ---
    I'm almost there, Isumi!
[21:04] ---
    Wataru!
[21:09] ---
    Isumi!
[21:22] ---
    No, please get off me!
[21:23] ---
    No! Butler-in-debt, ya perv!
[21:24] ---
    Just what do you think a girl's body is for?!
[21:26] ---
    Wait, why do I gotta come fallin' down, too?!
[21:28] ---
    Wait, hurry up and make a jab, askin'
    where the heck I came fallin' from?!
[21:31] ---
    Are you all right, Isumi?!
[21:33] ---
    Oh, my dear Hayate truly
    is a dependable gentleman.
[21:38] ---
    So, the punch line is that
    yet again, in this episode,
[21:42] ---
    it was the butler-in-debt who
    was secretly the most active.
[21:44] ---
    That's it for the filler segment
[21:47] ---
    "save the regular fall guys"!
[21:50] ---
    Why...
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:05] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    Wataru and...
[23:26] ---
    Wataru & Saki's
[23:27] ---
    Saki's...
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report
[23:28] ---
    Butler Report!
[23:29] ---
    What's up?! Wataru Tachibana here.
[23:31] ---
    And Saki Kijima.
[23:33] ---
    Young sir, about the promotional
    merchandise you mentioned...
[23:36] ---
    What about an autographed candid picture
[23:38] ---
    of the shop's mini-manager, Wataru Tachibana?
[23:41] ---
    Saki?! When was this taken?!
[23:44] ---
    This is payback for last
    time! How do you like that?
[23:46] ---
    Well, anyway, Rental Video Tachibana
[23:49] ---
    is a shop where you can
    always count on a smile!
[23:51] ---
    If you find yourself in the neighborhood,
    please stop by and and visit us!
[23:54] ---
    Yes! Mystery!
SIGN    Preview
[23:58] ---
    It hasn't snowed yet, this year.
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    It's already been a year, hasn't it?
[24:03] ---
    Time certainly does fly.
[24:05] ---
    I'm a butler who was reborn to fight you!
[24:08] ---
    Take this!
[24:09] ---
    It's you...!
[24:10] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:11] ---
    "Hayate in Peril! All Functions Shut Down!!"
[24:12] ---
    Hayate in Peril! All Functions Shut Down!!
[24:15] ---
    At the moment, you've lost
    your butler powers...
[24:17] ---
    Because of the curse brought on by that
    woman, the chairwoman of Hakuo Academy.
[24:20] ---
    Did you know?
[24:21] ---
    "Cyborg" is short for "cybernetic organism!"
[24:24] ---
    

38 - Hayate in Peril! All Functions Shut Down!!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Nag
    When watching TV,
[00:04] Hay
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] Mar
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] Nag
    That's right.
[00:12] Kuz
    What?
[00:13] ---
    Sion, is this true?
[00:18] Shi
    Yes. Though, it is just a rumor.
[00:23] Kuz
    I have more money than I know what to do
    with and I do not even especially want it, but...
SIGN    I love cream puffs.
    by Kirika Kuzuha
SIGN    Eat pumpkin flan every day.
    by Kirika Kuzuha
SIGN    I want the Earth.
    by Kirika Kuzuha
SIGN    I want to eat millefeuille.
    by Kirika Kuzuha
SIGN    I want Hayate Ayasaki. Kirika Kuzuha
[00:33] Mar
    As a way to stave off boredom, it
    will be worth seeing if it is true.
[00:39] Shi
    Um, Mistress Kuzuha, those are
    for the Tanabata Festival...
[00:49] Nar
    Whosoever commands the
    butlers, commands the world!
[00:52] Nar
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[00:58] Hay
    Now, today, the episode will have
    to do with the Milky Way...
[01:01] Nag
    Enough already! It's Christmas!
[01:02] Nag
    Part one of the advance
    final episode is starting!
[01:05] Shi
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:08] Shi
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:10] Shi
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:16] Shi
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[01:21] Shi
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[01:27] Shi
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[01:32] Shi
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[01:38] Shi
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[01:43] Shi
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[01:48] Shi
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[01:54] Shi
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[01:59] Shi
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[02:02] Shi
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:05] Shi
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:10] Shi
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:13] Shi
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:16] Shi
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[02:35] ---
    Hayate in Peril! All Functions Shut Down!!
[02:41] Hay
    The Miss certainly is taking a long time.
[02:43] Hay
    Might she be playing games
    in her room or something?
[02:46] Mar
    No, she made sure to attend last
    yet, so I think that is unlikely.
[02:50] Mar
    Besides, this was the invitation...
[02:51] ---
    Invitation
[02:54] Hay
    "If you do not attend, I will spread
    around an embarrassing photo of you.
[02:58] Hay
    By Mikado Sanzenin."
[03:03] Hay
    The Miss?
[03:04] Hay
    True, the Miss may find this
    an embarrassing photograph.
[03:08] Mar
    She fell for a trap set by Grandfather
    Mikado and this was her penalty for losing.
[03:12] Hay
    A... "trap"?
[03:15] Mar
    I think it involved investing in
    a game company on that occasion.
[03:19] Mar
    He fed her false information about the
    release of the Dreamcast 100 Mega CD Master System.
[03:24] Mar
    Well, the loss was limited
    to about 20 billion, though.
[03:28] Hay
    Th-That's the kind of trap a grandfather
    lays for his young granddaughter?
[03:36] Hay
    Um, who is this butler-looking person?
[03:39] Mar
    Oh, that's Himegami.
[03:41] Mar
    Nagi's previous butler.
[03:43] Hay
    Wow, so this is him.
[03:45] Hay
    But what in the world is he doing?
[03:47] Mar
    Who knows? Perhaps he's looking
    for UFOs or something.
[03:50] Mar
    Also, he seemed to like high
    places for some reason.
[03:53] Hay
    I see...
[03:54] Nag
    Sorry to keep you two waiting.
[04:03] Hay
    Miss...
[04:04] Hay
    That's the coat I lent you long ago...
[04:07] Nag
    Well, I wasn't sure what I wanted to wear
[04:09] Nag
    and I just happened to see it when
    I was looking through my closet.
[04:12] Nag
    It's true!
[04:18] Mik
    Now... Ahem.
[04:19] Mik
    I am truly happy to see you
    all again here this year.
[04:23] Mik
    As you can see, I am still alive and kicking.
[04:26] Mik
    My condolences to those of you
    waiting for your inheritances.
[04:30] Mik
    Now, to even longer life for me. And
    prosperity for the Sanzenin family.
[04:33] Mik
    And prosperity for the Sanzenin family.
[04:35] Mik
    Merry Christmas!
[04:37] All
    Merry Christmas!
[04:40] Hay
    So, all of these people are
    related to the Sanzenin family...
[04:44] Mar
    Yes, everyone comes together
    like this every year.
[04:46] ---
    To pay their respect to Grandfather Mikado.
[04:49] Nag
    It was also after I had escaped from this
    party that I met you for the first time last year.
[04:54] Hay
    I see, so that's how it was.
[04:56] Sak
    What's this, Nagi? Stayin'
    in a corner like that?
[04:59] Sak
    This is a party, after all.
[05:00] Sak
    Try to look like yer sufferin' more!
[05:03] Sak
    Merry...
[05:04] Hay
    ...Stigmas!
[05:07] Hay
    Please, Sakuya, that's a Showa Era gag.
[05:11] Sak
    A brilliant jab.
[05:13] Sak
    You've grown.
[05:15] Hay
    Thank you very much, master!
[05:17] Sak
    Ya just keep on devotin'
    yerself to the art like that.
[05:18] Gil
    Hey, Hayate Ayasaki.
[05:21] Hay
    This voice...
[05:22] Gil
    Please be defeated by me next year for sure!
[05:25] Gil
    I will be counting sorrowfully on you.
[05:27] Sak
    Hey, Bro, where'd ya sneak in from?
[05:29] Hay
    You certainly don't get discouraged easily.
[05:32] Hay
    I'd completely forgotten
    about it recently, but...
[05:35] Hay
    Tell this to the other
    potential heirs as well!
[05:37] Hay
    If you want the Sanzenin fortune, first,
    defeat their butler, Hayate Ayasaki!
[05:43] Hay
    I'm really glad we've made it to
    the end of the year without mishap.
[05:48] Nag
    Hayate...
[05:53] Mik
    You're shabby-looking as ever, boy.
[05:56] Mik
    There's no sense of what you're made of.
[06:00] Mik
    Incidentally, this is a can made of steel.
[06:02] Hay
    When did you get over here?!
[06:03] Sak
    That wasn't funny one bit, Gramps.
[06:06] Mik
    I dumbed myself down to your level.
[06:08] Sak
    What's the big idea anyway?! It's
    a party, so dress like yer at one!
[06:12] Gil
    Oh, great Mikado! Please give me your fortune! I'm begging you!
[06:14] Mik
    So how about it? Have you found
    the meaning of life since then?
[06:17] Gil
    Come on, you could just give it to me!
[06:17] Hay
    What? Well...
[06:19] Gil
    Please stop!
[06:19] Hay
    Yes! Protecting the Miss is my life's...
[06:21] Gil
    I am a concerned party!
[06:23] ---
    To what purpose?
[06:27] ---
    Well, that is...
[06:28] ---
    I owe the Miss a great deal, after all.
[06:31] ---
    And I also have a debt of
    150 million to begin with.
[06:36] ---
    Hey, you old geezer!
[06:37] ---
    Don't appear for the first time
    after so long and criticize Hayate!
[06:39] ---
    Oh, my god!
[06:41] ---
    Miss...
[06:41] ---
    Why does this always happen?!
[06:42] ---
    Go train with Senjinmaru
    somewhere or something!
[06:47] ---
    Let's go, Hayate.
[06:48] ---
    Oh... What? Um, but...
[06:50] ---
    Oh, Grandfather.
[06:52] ---
    Maria, my granddaughter is being mean to me!
[06:55] ---
    Yes, yes.
[06:57] ---
    Oh, that's right.
[06:58] ---
    Hold on for a second.
[07:01] ---
    Maria!
[07:05] ---
    Here.
[07:08] ---
    To Maria
[07:10] ---
    Happy Birthday Maria
    I'll continue to count on you.
    Nagi
[07:15] ---
    I'm going out for a bit.
[07:16] ---
    You make sure you babysit that guy.
[07:25] ---
    Thank you, Nagi.
[07:27] ---
    She could've just said it to your face.
[07:29] ---
    That darn shy granddaughter.
[07:31] ---
    Maria, what's your perspective on this?
[07:34] ---
    Are you referring to Hayate?
[07:35] ---
    He's done very well for us.
[07:37] ---
    Nagi adores him, too.
[07:39] ---
    But...
[07:41] ---
    Nagi, your true feelings
    have yet to reach Hayate...
[07:45] ---
    Hayate, don't you pay any attention
    to what that bastard says.
[07:46] ---
    Loser Park
[07:49] ---
    That old geezer lives for making
    other people's lives difficult.
[07:52] ---
    Is that so?
[07:53] ---
    But anyway, I guess it hasn't
    snowed yet this year.
[07:56] ---
    It's already been a year
    since then, hasn't it?
[07:59] ---
    Yes, the days go by so fast.
[08:02] ---
    Won't you go with me?
[08:04] ---
    What?
[08:06] ---
    I want you!
[08:10] ---
    I-It's about time we took
    things to the next level.
[08:14] ---
    I even wore the coat that
    holds our memories, after all.
[08:17] ---
    This is where I should
    casually take the initiative!
[08:22] ---
    A-Aren't the stars pretty, Hayate?
[08:25] ---
    Yes, they certainly are.
[08:28] ---
    It's quite the romantic Christmas Eve.
[08:31] ---
    I'm sure that right about
    now, all across the city,
[08:33] ---
    l-lovers are looking up at the
    night sky, deep in conversation.
[08:37] ---
    E-Especially since the stars
    are sparkling so brightly.
[08:40] ---
    Miss, you have an interest
    in celestial bodies?
[08:44] ---
    Then I shall tell you about
    the winter constellations.
[08:47] ---
    Then, first, please look
    towards the northern sky.
[08:50] Hay
    Let us look for the North Star, a fundamental in stargazing.
[08:52] Nag
    Hayate must be feeling self-conscious.
[08:55] Nag
    Darn shy bastard!
[08:55] Hay
    The popular method of looking for the North Star is to find the Big Dipper,
[08:57] Hay
    but that is actually only for the spring and summer.
[09:00] Hay
    It's winter right now, so we'll use the Cassiopeia constellation.
[09:03] ---
    Oh, incidentally, as to why I'm
    familiar with explaining such things,
[09:07] ---
    I worked on the 60th floor
    of the Nikko building...
[09:10] ---
    Wh-What the hell is this?!
[09:13] ---
    Things were just getting good!
[09:16] ---
    Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
[09:18] ---
    Could it be a construction
    worker or something?
[09:25] ---
    I'm Cyborg Butler!
[09:28] ---
    I am a butler who was reborn
    in order to fight you!
[09:34] ---
    Hayate, what is it that
    I'm looking at right now?
[09:38] ---
    Explain it to me so I can understand.
[09:40] ---
    What? Well...
[09:42] ---
    Stop calling me "old mister"! I
    might not look it, but I'm still 20!
[09:45] ---
    Wait, I haven't even said anything yet!
[09:47] ---
    This odd development of a battle...
[09:49] ---
    I had no idea it was still continuing.
[09:54] ---
    Drill Knee!
[09:58] ---
    Hayate...
[10:00] ---
    What are you doing?!
[10:02] ---
    Broken Bullet!
[10:18] ---
    You leave me no choice.
    I will be your opponent!
[10:21] ---
    H-Hey, Hayate!
[10:23] ---
    It's dangerous, so please stay back.
[10:25] ---
    Here we go, mystery-person!
[10:26] ---
    Look over here.
[10:32] ---
    Hayate?!
[10:33] ---
    M-My body...
[10:35] ---
    Merry Christmas, Hayate Ayasaki.
[10:38] ---
    Ms. Superintendent?!
[10:39] ---
    So this was your doing, as I suspected!
[10:40] ---
    Um, I don't know what you're up to here,
[10:43] ---
    but could you at least leave
    us alone during Christmas?
[10:46] ---
    Gotcha!
[10:47] ---
    Let go, you pipsqueak!
[10:49] ---
    You settle down, you pipsqueaky pipsqueak!
[10:52] ---
    White Serpent Magic, Seventh
    Spell. Butler Killer!
[11:10] ---
    Hayate! Hayate!
[11:13] ---
    Are you all right, Hayate?!
[11:15] ---
    Yes, Miss...
[11:18] ---
    Do it.
[11:18] ---
    Are you really all right?
[11:20] ---
    Yes, I'm perfectly fine.
[11:22] ---
    Here goes!
[11:23] ---
    Drill Knee!
[11:25] ---
    For a butler, a technique
    he's already seen is...
[11:32] ---
    Broken Bullet!
[11:40] ---
    H-Hayate...
[11:43] ---
    Miss...
[11:45] ---
    Hell and Heaven!
[11:58] ---
    Hayate!
[12:08] ---
    Hayate...
[12:13] ---
    Sion!
[12:14] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[12:17] ---
    Yeah!
[12:18] ---
    Yeah!
[12:20] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, this photograph will...
[12:22] ---
    Sweet crêpes. Tasty crêpes.
[12:25] ---
    It's Mister Crêpe's Japan's
    tastiest mobile crêpe vendor!
[12:28] ---
    Ooh!
[12:29] ---
    Oh, Mistress Kuzuha!
[12:32] ---
    Hayate!
[12:33] ---
    Finish him off, just to be safe!
[12:35] ---
    Final Hammer approved!
[12:36] ---
    Drive!
[12:37] ---
    Hayate, pull yourself together! Hey!
[12:39] ---
    Miss, please do not mind me. Just run.
[12:43] ---
    Don't be ridiculous! Running and
    leaving you behind would be...
[12:46] ---
    Goldion Giant Mallet!
[12:50] ---
    D-Don't you dare touch Hayate!
[12:52] ---
    Miss...
[12:53] ---
    Turn to light!
[13:08] ---
    Who the hell are you?!
[13:16] ---
    Bastard! Are you with them?!
[13:20] ---
    Well, whatever. This is a good opportunity.
[13:23] ---
    I'll show you the greatest and
    final weapon that I've got left!
[13:26] ---
    And that's...
[13:28] ---
    Courage!
[13:36] ---
    You are...
[13:41] ---
    Hayate!
[13:42] ---
    Hayate!
[13:49] ---
    Himegami, you...
[13:51] ---
    Himegami? Who might that be?
[13:54] ---
    I am the mysterious hero,
[13:58] ---
    Princess God.
    (hime = princess, gami/kami = god)
[14:00] ---
    That's a literal translation...
[14:04] ---
    Great explosion!
    (Dai bakuhatsu!)
[14:09] ---
    Tsumagoi Village.
    (Tsumagoi-mura)
[14:13] ---
    Huh? Where am I?
[14:15] ---
    Hello, there, Hayate. Long time no see!
[14:18] ---
    Hey!
SIGN    Mother
SIGN    Father
[14:19] ---
    Mom! Dad!
[14:20] ---
    I thought you foisted off your debt
    on me a year ago and went into hiding.
[14:25] ---
    What about you? What's with that outfit?
[14:28] ---
    What?
[14:29] ---
    I-I'm currently working as Miss Nagi's
    butler at the Sanzenin household.
[14:34] ---
    So? What in the world do you want?
[14:36] ---
    How rude of you after all this time.
[14:39] ---
    But I mean, a butler?
[14:42] ---
    Hayate, there's no way you're qualified
    for such a respectable job.
[14:46] ---
    What?
[14:47] ---
    After all, you're our son!
[14:52] ---
    Th-That can't be...
[14:56] ---
    Y-You okay, Hayate?
[14:58] ---
    So you have finally come to.
[15:00] Shi
    A d-dream...
[15:02] ---
    Are you really all right?
[15:04] ---
    Yes, pretty much...
[15:06] ---
    I am so sorry.
[15:08] ---
    My duty is to protect the Miss, and yet...
[15:11] ---
    I-It's fine. Everyone has their bad days.
[15:15] ---
    Besides, you know...
[15:16] ---
    Recovering from defeat is a standard
    plot device in hero manga.
[15:20] ---
    R-Right...
[15:22] ---
    I swear! Where have you been and what
    have you been doing all this time?!
[15:26] ---
    Showing up shamelessly after all this time!
[15:28] ---
    Himegami!
[15:30] ---
    Besides, you were fired from the
    Sanzenin household a long time ago!
[15:34] ---
    So this is Himegami...
[15:34] ---
    And what is with that mask?!
[15:35] ---
    Is it that thing?
[15:36] ---
    But I wonder what that mask is about...
[15:36] ---
    That mysterious white thing that's
    been crucified in the basement?!
[15:40] ---
    Then get a spear! Get a spear to go with it!
[15:43] ---
    Hey, wake up!
[15:47] ---
    My head hurts. Why is that?
[15:49] ---
    It's because I hit you.
[15:51] ---
    Want me to hit you again?
[15:53] ---
    What?!
[15:58] ---
    Himegami! You bastard! How dare
    you lay a hand on the Miss!
[16:01] ---
    You do it to me, I do it back to
    you. I live by that principle.
[16:05] ---
    Why you!
[16:07] ---
    And I am not this Himegami person.
[16:10] ---
    Princess God.
[16:12] ---
    A mysterious hero just passing by.
[16:14] ---
    Enough already, Himegami!
[16:16] ---
    I am not Himegami.
[16:18] ---
    I've long told you that there's to
    be no hitting, haven't I, Himegami?
[16:21] ---
    As I said, I am Princess...
[16:23] ---
    No, no. Akane Himegami.
[16:23] ---
    Akane Himegami
[16:26] ---
    Uh, um, why was he fired?
[16:30] ---
    Because he's an idiot!
[16:32] ---
    I see...
[16:32] ---
    I fired him because he was
    an unbelievable idiot.
[16:34] ---
    Humph! Idiot! Idiot! Idiot!
[16:37] ---
    Do you think you look cool or
    something with that mask on?
[16:37] ---
    I know what the Miss said,
[16:39] ---
    but he's not the previous butler for nothing.
[16:39] ---
    I already have Hayate,
[16:41] ---
    so there's no point in you coming back now!
[16:41] ---
    There's a kind of polished aura about him.
[16:44] ---
    Nagi and Himegami have always
    been like that, so...
[16:48] ---
    Oh, i-is that right?
[16:51] ---
    W-Well, how about some tea to start with?
[16:56] ---
    Miss. Himegami.
[16:58] ---
    Please drink this for now
    and compose yourselves.
[17:01] ---
    S-Sure, thanks.
[17:04] ---
    Hot!
[17:06] ---
    H-Hayate, what's with this tea?
[17:08] ---
    It's hot enough to burn my tongue.
[17:10] ---
    What? That's not right.
[17:19] ---
    Hayate...
[17:20] ---
    H-Hey, Ayasaki, what are you doing?!
[17:23] ---
    At that rate, you are a failure as a butler!
[17:26] ---
    I am so very sorry!
[17:27] ---
    Um, p-please pardon me!
[17:30] ---
    Wh-What the? That's strange. I was
    sure I did everything right...
[17:34] ---
    However, that was not the
    last of Hayate's mistakes.
[17:39] ---
    Wh-What the?
[17:40] ---
    Ayasaki!
[17:42] ---
    Wh-What the?
[17:44] ---
    Ayasaki!
[17:46] ---
    Wh-What the?
[17:47] ---
    Ayasaki!
[17:49] ---
    Furuya Station Police Box
[17:50] ---
    It seems he got lost while running errands.
[17:53] ---
    What in the...
[17:54] ---
    A-ya-sa-ki...
[17:56] ---
    Ayasaki, what the hell are you doing?!
[17:59] ---
    P-Pardon me!
[18:02] ---
    Christmas Cakes
[18:03] ---
    How would you like a Christmas cake?!
[18:06] ---
    I-Is it just my imagination?
[18:08] ---
    I have a feeling that something
    bad's happening to Hayate...
[18:14] ---
    And to me, too!
[18:15] ---
    Well, leaving that aside, once
    again back at the estate...
[18:19] ---
    Hayate, what in the world
    has gotten into you?
[18:21] ---
    This isn't like you at all.
[18:23] ---
    Y-Yes...
[18:25] ---
    Why don't you take a little time off?
[18:28] ---
    Oh, no, please!
[18:29] ---
    I agree, that may be a good idea.
[18:32] ---
    I-I am fine!
[18:34] ---
    I can't be the only one to take time
    off during the busy year-end period!
[18:37] ---
    Nah, don't worry. I've also got
    Maria, after all. Rest easy.
[18:42] ---
    I understand.
[18:51] ---
    What could have happened to Hayate?
[18:54] ---
    He's been unable to accomplish
    any of his duties as a butler.
[18:58] ---
    Say, Maria, could it be
    that I'm a poor mistress?
[19:03] ---
    What?
[19:04] ---
    I want to be encouraging to Hayate,
[19:06] ---
    but the words just don't seem
    to come out quite right.
[19:10] ---
    Even if he makes some mistakes or loses
    in fights, Hayate is still Hayate.
[19:15] ---
    But a part of me had always thought
    of him as an invincible hero, so...
[19:26] ---
    Miss...
[19:28] ---
    What in the world has happened to me?
[19:31] ---
    You're that way because your butler
    abilities were sucked out of you.
[19:34] ---
    By that woman.
[19:35] ---
    What?!
[19:39] ---
    Himegami...
[19:41] ---
    A banana?
[19:43] ---
    I'm not giving it to you.
[19:45] ---
    Wh-What's with this person?
[19:48] ---
    Never mind that. Um, about
    what you just said...
[19:51] ---
    Right now, you have lost
    your powers as a butler.
[19:54] ---
    Because of the curse laid down by that woman,
[19:57] ---
    the superintendent of Hakuou Academy.
[19:58] ---
    How would you know such a thing?
SIGN    End of the Century Legend Magical Destroy Nagi Sanzenin
[20:03] ---
    This is from the school festival...
[20:07] ---
    Don't tell me...
[20:09] ---
    Have you been watching over
    the Miss all this time?
[20:12] ---
    Please answer me!
[20:15] ---
    Nagi is heavy of heart.
[20:17] ---
    Because she had faith in you and you lost.
[20:21] ---
    And now, you are no longer
    capable of protecting Nagi.
[20:25] ---
    That is not...!
[20:30] ---
    See? There you go.
[20:35] ---
    Let me give you some friendly advice.
[20:36] ---
    Leave this place.
[21:01] ---
    There's no stamp on it or anything.
[21:03] ---
    Someone hand-delivered this.
[21:13] ---
    Hayate? Um, if you'd like, how
    about some tea with everyone?
[21:32] ---
    This is...!
[21:33] ---
    Letter of Resignation
[21:40] ---
    This is how it should be.
[21:42] ---
    To protect the Miss, this is the
    only course of action for me.
[21:45] ---
    Hayate disappears alone. What
    could he mean by those words?
[21:49] ---
    Next time, at long last, they will
    fight against the final episode.
[21:52] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:54] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:58] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:07] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:21] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:26] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:33] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:38] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:43] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:49] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:55] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:56] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:06] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:09] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:13] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:26] ---
    Wataru & Saki's
[23:26] Wat
    Wataru and...
[23:27] Saki
    Saki's...
[23:28] Nag
    And Nagi's!
[23:28] 3
    Butler Report!
[23:28] ---
    Butler Report
[23:31] Nag
    I'm back! Nagi Sanzenin here.
[23:33] Wat
    Wataru Tachibana!
[23:34] Saki
    I'm Saki Kijima.
[23:36] Wat
    What's up, Nagi? This corner is usually
[23:38] ---
    about advertising for Rental Video Tachibana.
[23:40] Nag
    There were a lot of complaints
    about the flirting between you two,
[23:43] ---
    so I'm here to check up on you!
[23:45] Saki
    Goodness, flirting?! That's an
    inappropriate way of putting it, miss!
[23:48] Wat
    That's right! Don't be stupid!
[23:50] Nag
    So, who do you like more, Isumi or Saki?
[23:53] Nag
    Oh, time's up.
[23:54] 3
    There'll be a special edition next time!
SIGN    Preview
[23:57] Hay
    If I become your butler, you'll give up
    on the Sanzenin family fortune, right?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:01] Hay
    But why would you want that,
    after stealing my butler power?
[24:03] Shi
    So that you can obtain even
    greater butler power...
[24:06] Shi
    And be reborn as the perfect butler,
    who is totally loyal to me!
[24:11] Hay
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:12] Hay
    The conclusion to this battle,
[24:14] Hay
    "Hurray for the Butler-in-Debt,
    Friend to Good Children!"
[24:14] ---
    Hurray for the Butler-in-Debt,
    Friend to Good Children!
[24:16] Nag
    Hayate... as long as I have you...!
[24:19] Hay
    Miss!
[24:20] Nag
    Did you know?
[24:21] Nag
    In America, they call episodes with endings
    designed to keep you in suspense "cliffhangers!"
[24:25] ---
    

39 - Hurray for the Butler-in-Debt, Friend to Good Children!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching TV,
[00:04] ---
    please keep the room bright...
[00:06] ---
    ...and sit well away from the TV.
[00:08] ---
    That's right.
[00:14] ---
    What? Hayate's left the residence?!
[00:17] ---
    We will need to find a
    replacement immediately.
[00:20] ---
    Hey!
[00:21] ---
    Mr. Klaus.
[00:22] ---
    He has insisted on quitting himself.
[00:25] ---
    It would be another story if
    he had discussed it with us.
[00:31] ---
    M-Maria, what should I do?!
    Hayate's really gone and done it!
[00:34] ---
    All because I was so awkward with him...
[00:39] ---
    Nagi...
[00:41] ---
    Hayate, where in the world
    have you disappeared to?
[00:45] ---
    Whosoever commands the
    butlers, commands the world!
[00:49] ---
    The Great Butler War that will
    shake up the world has just begun!
[00:54] ---
    Part two of the advance final
    episode! Startin' at last!
[00:57] ---
    Um, is this the only screen time we get?
[01:01] Shi
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
    I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:04] Shi
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:06] Shi
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
    The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:12] Shi
    Dou yattemo katenai akuma ga
    A demon that I just can't win against
[01:17] Shi
    Megami no kao o shite chakkari (O_O;)
    Brazenly pretending to be a goddess (O_O;)
[01:23] Shi
    Keikenchi ja tannai kurai dakara
    Experience points are almost not enough
[01:28] Shi
    Isshou tanren shikou-sakugo ni sessa-takuma
    Training for life, working hard at trial and error
[01:34] Shi
    Mondai nara muzukashii-hodo ude ga naru shi
    Tougher the problem the more it gets me going
[01:39] Shi
    Yorokobu kao ga mirerya sore de ii shi
    Seeing the joy on your face is enough for me
[01:44] Shi
    Takara no chizu o boku wa te ni ireta
    I've found a treasure map
[01:50] Shi
    Juuou-mujin kimi o tsurete tsuki-susumou!
    Totally free, I'll take you and push forward!
[01:56] Shi
    Happii na kanchigai
    A happy misunderstanding
[01:58] Shi
    Chikai wa yuruganai!
    My pledge will stand fast!
[02:01] Shi
    Kaze no yukue mo kaete-miseru
    I'll even change the direction of the wind
[02:06] Shi
    Kakkou wa kini-shinai
    I won't care how I look
[02:09] Shi
    Unmei ja kujikenai!
    No destiny will discourage me!
[02:12] Shi
    Ano kumo chirasu hayate no gotoku!
    Like the sudden gale scattering the clouds!
[02:31] ---
    SIGN: Hurray for the Butler-in-Debt,
    Friend to Good Children!
[02:34] ---
    Merry Christmas!
[02:37] ---
    Sis, don't tell me you've been drinking
    all this time since Christmas Eve?
[02:41] ---
    Yes!
[02:42] ---
    White Christmas, my ass!
[02:44] ---
    In that case, gosh darn it,
    I'm gonna turn totally red!
SIGN    Summer Beer
SIGN    Beware of Fire
[02:52] ---
    Hina!
[02:54] ---
    I may not look it,
[02:56] ---
    but I've received a couple thousand
    Open Heart pendants, you know!
[02:59] ---
    Drivers and treaters and Loch Ness Monsters!
[03:02] ---
    Just lemme stay a college student!
[03:05] ---
    Even though it's been a long time
    since I've been a college student.
[03:08] ---
    I'm a teacher, you know! Ahem!
[03:10] ---
    What are you? From the Bubble Generation?
[03:12] ---
    If you're lonely, you
    could've just come home.
[03:15] ---
    Me? Lonely?
[03:19] ---
    S-Sis?!
[03:29] ---
    To Sis
    Merry Christmas
    Hina
[03:33] ---
    A white Christmas, huh?
[03:37] ---
    Huh? Hayate?
[03:42] ---
    What are you doing here?
[03:43] ---
    N-Nothing. I just came for something
    I forgot in our classroom.
[03:47] ---
    But you seem to be empty-handed.
[03:51] ---
    You are not accepting your
    defeat graciously, Ayasaki.
[03:55] ---
    I imagine you were visiting the
    classroom that holds all your memories
[03:59] ---
    and bidding your final farewell to Sanzenin.
[04:01] ---
    Is that about right?
[04:02] ---
    Farewell?
[04:03] ---
    Have you found your resolve?
[04:05] ---
    I will give the Superintendent
    my answer in person.
[04:08] ---
    What's going on?
[04:09] ---
    What in the world is the
    Superintendent up to?
[04:12] ---
    Well, that is...
[04:14] ---
    A rumor has been circulating in the
    butler community since around autumn.
[04:18] ---
    Sion!
[04:19] ---
    It went like this: whoever defeats
    the butler Hayate Ayasaki
[04:23] ---
    will receive the vast Sanzenin inheritance.
[04:26] ---
    What?
[04:27] ---
    I thought it was just a wild rumor,
[04:29] ---
    but it seems it was not altogether false.
[04:34] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[04:36] ---
    Just show it to me!
[04:36] ---
    Wait! That's...
[04:39] ---
    Looks like you had a terrible Christmas...
[04:41] ---
    Yes, well...
[04:43] ---
    Could this be...?
[04:45] ---
    This is blackmail!
[04:47] ---
    Um, Hinagiku...
[04:49] ---
    You make it sound so ugly.
[04:50] ---
    Hand over the original file to this photo!
[04:52] ---
    Taking advantage of
    someone's weakness is low!
[04:55] ---
    Oh-ho.
[04:58] ---
    Please stop. Hinagiku has
    nothing to do with this.
[05:01] ---
    What are you saying, Hayate?!
[05:03] ---
    Now, how about you hurry
    up and take me to her?
[05:06] ---
    Wait, Hayate!
[05:07] ---
    Please don't breathe a
    word of this to the Miss.
[05:14] ---
    Hayate!
[05:18] ---
    But this is...
[05:27] ---
    You have done well to come, Ayasaki.
[05:29] ---
    Have you found your resolve
    to become one of my subjects?
[05:32] ---
    If I become your butler,
[05:34] ---
    you'll relinquish your claim
    on the Sanzenin inheritance?
[05:37] ---
    Yes, I will promise you that.
[05:39] ---
    But why? You stole my butler powers from me.
[05:42] ---
    You will be gaining even greater
    butler powers than you had before.
[05:46] ---
    And you will be reborn into a perfect butler,
[05:50] ---
    who swears his devotion to me, body and soul.
[05:58] ---
    Hayate...
[06:03] ---
    Yes, this is the Sanzenin residence.
[06:06] ---
    Oh, Hinagiku. What? Hayate is...
[06:09] ---
    Hello? It's me!
[06:11] ---
    What?!
[06:12] ---
    He told me to keep it a secret,
    but I just couldn't let it go.
[06:15] ---
    And it seemed like he was being blackmailed.
[06:18] ---
    Something to do with the
    Sanzenin inheritance.
[06:22] ---
    Hayate did this to protect
    me and the Sanzenin family...
[06:26] ---
    Nagi...
[06:28] ---
    Damn that Hayate! Trying to
    handle this all by himself!
[06:31] ---
    A butler and his mistress are as one!
[06:33] ---
    We must stand together, no matter
    what difficulties or crises we face!
[06:37] ---
    Then, as Hayate's mistress, there
    is only one thing for you to do.
[06:41] ---
    Yes!
[06:42] ---
    Hold down the fort in my absence, Maria!
[06:44] ---
    Yes, ma'am.
[06:46] ---
    Sion, bring the item.
[06:49] ---
    What?
[06:50] ---
    Yes, Mistress Kuzuha.
[06:56] ---
    Th-That's...!
[06:58] ---
    A butler treasure from ancient times.
[07:01] ---
    Huh?
[07:04] ---
    Wh-What could this butler
    treasure possibly be?!
[07:07] ---
    To be continued in the second half!
[07:11] ---
    Ramipasu, ramipasu, rerererere!
    (Ramipasu, ramipasu, rerererere!)
[07:16] ---
    Rerere and re, how are you doing?!
    (Rerere no re, genki desu ka?!)
[07:19] ---
    I obtained this treasure when
    I was exploring the Amazons.
[07:24] ---
    Th-The Amazons?
[07:25] ---
    I originally went there to obtain
    the legendary vanilla beans.
[07:31] ---
    The cave we accidentally
    discovered were the ruins
[07:34] ---
    of an ancient butler super-civilization,
    which had fallen eons ago.
[07:39] ---
    Uh, um, what in the world is this
    ancient butler super-civilization?
[07:42] ---
    However, we unflinchingly proceeded
    deeper and deeper inside.
[07:46] ---
    Oh, she ignored me.
[07:49] ---
    At the back of the cave was the giant
    serpent Jörmungandr, Jör for short.
[07:52] ---
    And there, he was protecting
    the ancient treasure.
[07:57] ---
    We, too, won his trust and became
    guardians of the treasure,
[08:02] ---
    and thus...
[08:04] ---
    I gained the power to
    wield White Serpent Magic!
[08:07] ---
    I gained the power to become
    a handsome young man!
[08:10] ---
    Jör granted these powers to us!
[08:12] ---
    So that we might protect
    the treasure with him!
[08:14] ---
    D-Doesn't that mean they're
    being used by the serpent?
[08:21] ---
    Oh, they really are being controlled...
[08:23] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, you should be honored!
[08:26] ---
    I will allow you to also see
[08:28] ---
    the treasure of the ancient
    butler super-civilization!
[08:32] ---
    This ancient butler uniform
    still lies slumbering.
[08:35] ---
    Sion and I have tried it with
    numerous butlers thus far,
[08:38] ---
    but no matter how superior
    these butlers were,
[08:41] ---
    they were rebuffed by the garment
    and could not even don it.
[08:50] ---
    Uh, but wait, that's not a butler's uniform!
[08:54] ---
    However, you should be able to
    don this garment, without fail.
[08:58] ---
    Now, become a butler who
    serves us body and soul!
[09:02] ---
    But that's not a butler's...!
[09:04] ---
    Incidentally, once you don this garment,
[09:06] ---
    you will never be able to take it off again.
[09:08] ---
    Furthermore, if you should
    be rebuffed by the garment,
[09:10] ---
    there will be a retaliatory curse
    that turns you into a white serpent.
[09:13] ---
    What?!
[09:14] ---
    And now, we will conduct the ceremony.
[09:17] ---
    Elohim essaim, elohim essaim,
[09:20] ---
    I beseech you to indulge this fan girl.
[09:23] ---
    Sacred ancient garment, awaken now!
[09:29] ---
    The most powerful butler uniform
    is finally about to awaken!
[09:34] ---
    Miss!
[09:39] ---
    That's...!
[09:40] ---
    Hayate must be there!
[09:41] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[09:44] ---
    There she is!
[09:45] ---
    Hey! Over here!
[09:48] ---
    So it's begun.
[09:51] ---
    Hayate, are you all right?! We've come to...
[09:53] ---
    Huh?!
[09:55] ---
    Is it sweet, Mistress?
[09:59] ---
    Yes, truly exceptional.
[10:01] ---
    I'm so happy, meow.
[10:03] ---
    Nice.
[10:04] ---
    H-Hayate! Hey! What happened to you...?
[10:07] ---
    Oh, my! We have guests!
[10:09] ---
    I will prepare the tea right away.
[10:11] ---
    H-Hayate, you don't recognize me...?
[10:15] ---
    He is my butler now, body and soul.
[10:18] ---
    Behold that design!
[10:20] ---
    Truly, the legacy of an
    ancient super-civilization.
[10:24] ---
    Is he still called a butler even
    when he's dressed like that?
[10:28] ---
    A-Anyway, I'm taking Hayate back with me!
[10:30] ---
    Hey, Hayate!
[10:31] ---
    Let's start by getting that thing off him!
[10:33] ---
    R-Right.
[10:44] ---
    Do not interfere.
[10:46] ---
    This snack time is a 30,000 year
    old desire of mine, slither.
[10:51] ---
    I see. Though this seems
    a bit too simplistic.
[10:54] ---
    That's right!
[10:55] ---
    This serpent is controlling Hayate
    and the Superintendent, slither!
[11:04] ---
    H-Hey, move aside!
[11:06] ---
    Stand in my way and I'll...!
[11:09] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki has no need
    of two mistresses, slither!
[11:16] ---
    P-Protect the Miss!
[11:32] ---
    Who are you, slither?!
[11:34] ---
    Himegami?!
[11:36] ---
    My name is Princess God.
[11:38] ---
    Born in darkness, living in darkness...
[11:39] ---
    Well, whatever.
[11:41] ---
    I'll leave that guy to you!
[12:04] ---
    H-Hey, Hayate! Now's your chance!
    Hurry up and get that weird outfit...
[12:08] ---
    Yes?
[12:10] ---
    Since it's come to this, even
    if I have to use force...
[12:13] ---
    Wh-What are you doing?!
[12:15] ---
    Just get that outfit off him, Nagi!
[12:18] ---
    Right!
[12:19] ---
    Please stop!
[12:22] ---
    They seem to be having fun.
[12:23] ---
    But it's too soon.
[12:25] ---
    That garment has yet to
    achieve its true awakening...
[12:27] ---
    What are you plotting?
[12:35] ---
    Hinagiku! Himegami!
[12:38] ---
    Nagi!
[12:40] ---
    Hayate is my butler!
[12:42] ---
    I will let no one have him!
[12:45] ---
    I don't need the mansion...
[12:48] ---
    I don't need my fortune...
[12:50] ---
    Hayate,
[12:51] ---
    if you'll just be there for
    me, that's all I care about!
[12:55] ---
    Even if you've lost your butler powers.
[12:59] ---
    So...
[13:00] ---
    So, please! Wake up, Hayate!
[13:11] ---
    Hayate, you...
[13:14] ---
    Miss, I am so very sorry! I...
[13:18] ---
    I...!
[13:20] ---
    Hayate...
[13:22] ---
    You'll be punished for this later.
[13:26] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[13:33] ---
    Hayate!
[13:34] ---
    It's begun.
[13:42] ---
    Stab!
[13:49] ---
    Th-The impudence!
[13:54] ---
    I'm your opponent!
[13:56] ---
    H-How gallant, slither.
[14:00] ---
    H-Hayate!
[14:01] ---
    Come on! Run!
[14:04] ---
    Not to worry, Miss.
[14:06] ---
    But right now, your butler powers are...
[14:09] ---
    I'll be fine. Even without such powers,
[14:12] ---
    as long as I have you to believe in me,
[14:15] ---
    I am...
[14:17] ---
    I am still a butler!
[14:19] ---
    Hayate!
[14:26] ---
    Wh-What just happened?
[14:28] ---
    "If one wishes to awaken
    the sacred butler uniform,
[14:31] ---
    "he must..."
[14:32] ---
    Um, how do you read this?
[14:35] ---
    Let me see that!
[14:36] ---
    Let's see...
[14:37] ---
    "...he must temporarily
    lose his butler powers."
[14:41] ---
    "The treasure exists to test whether
    he possesses a true butler's soul
[14:46] ---
    "and lies slumbering in
    the guise of a maiden."
[14:50] ---
    "However, when he is truly recognized,
    the treasure will awaken"
[14:54] ---
    "and it will surely reveal its
    rightful form before his very eyes."
[15:01] ---
    S-So that's how it works.
[15:03] ---
    I would love to have this
    strategy guide, slither.
[15:05] ---
    There are too many mysteries to begin with
[15:07] ---
    that you need a strategy
    guide to figure out, slither!
[15:09] ---
    So? Where did you buy this book?
[15:12] ---
    On Yahoo! Auction.
[15:16] ---
    Ah! This time, for sure!
[15:18] ---
    This time for sure, the most powerful
    butler uniform will awaken!
[15:21] ---
    Uh, um, I'm Hayate Ayasaki,
[15:24] ---
    a butler who protects the
    Sanzenin family and Miss Nagi.
[15:28] ---
    Yes.
[15:29] ---
    So this is the legendary butler uniform!
[15:31] ---
    Talk about tasteless.
[15:33] ---
    Th-This is what I spent 30,000 years on?
[15:36] ---
    Ah! You're sparkling!
[15:38] ---
    So cool! You look super cool, Hayate!
[15:41] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[15:45] ---
    Hey! Are you people blind?!
[15:48] ---
    Infernal thing!
[15:49] ---
    I will destroy that stupid item, slither!
[15:51] ---
    I will be free, slither!
[15:57] ---
    H-Hayate!
[15:59] ---
    Come to me now!
[16:01] ---
    The lethal butler technique
    that's mine and mine alone!
[16:07] ---
    Here I go!
[16:40] ---
    Hayate.
[16:43] ---
    Miss.
[16:46] ---
    It's dangerous in here! Get outside!
[16:54] ---
    Th-The academy's precious facility...
[16:58] ---
    Himegami!
[17:00] ---
    Thanks to you, I have this awakened
    item in my possession now.
[17:04] ---
    Himegami...
[17:06] ---
    Please take good care of Nagi.
[17:09] ---
    Don't tell me you used Hayate
    just for that thing?!
[17:12] ---
    What?!
[17:13] ---
    I didn't want to wear it
    myself to undo the curse.
[17:17] ---
    What the hell is that glittery
    outfit anyway?! Well, Himegami?!
[17:21] ---
    I am not Himegami. I am Princess God.
[17:24] ---
    In time, I will save this world...
[17:25] ---
    Enough!
[17:27] ---
    Just three more pieces and the legendary
    God Butler Dragon will be...
[17:32] ---
    Sheesh! What's with him?!
[17:35] ---
    But if it weren't for Himegami, I
    may have stayed like that forever.
[17:39] ---
    Well, maybe, but...
[17:45] ---
    Wh-Where am I?
[17:47] ---
    What in the world have I
    been doing all this time?
[17:51] ---
    M-Mistress Kuzuha! Thank goodness!
[17:56] ---
    It looks like those two are
    free of the curse as well.
[17:59] ---
    Which means...
[18:01] ---
    Peace has returned to Hakuou Academy now.
[18:05] ---
    Sion, your smaller form
    is fine in its own way.
[18:09] ---
    Oh, Mistress Kuzuha.
[18:13] ---
    Uh, but they don't seem to
    be all that different...
[18:16] ---
    Oh, that reminds me! What about
    the original file to that photo?
[18:19] ---
    Oh! It's in here!
[18:21] ---
    The memory card's probably
    in a million pieces, too!
[18:26] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha!
[18:30] ---
    I see. Then please be
    careful on your way home.
[18:34] ---
    I will be waiting for you, Nagi.
[18:38] ---
    Everyone should be arriving about now.
[18:51] ---
    Have a good Christmas, you two.
[18:54] ---
    Huh? I didn't know you were
    still at school, Hina.
[18:58] ---
    Wait... Whoa! The hell is this?!
[19:01] ---
    Well, a lot happened...
[19:03] ---
    Never mind that. What are *you *Ndoing out here at this hour, Sis?
[19:06] ---
    Huh? Oh, I was just going
    to buy some beer snacks.
[19:09] ---
    I figured I'd go for a fresh round of drinks.
[19:14] ---
    Want me to keep you company?
[19:16] ---
    Oh, but I'll be having juice, naturally.
[19:19] ---
    Sure!
[19:23] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[19:26] ---
    Nah, don't mention it...
[19:29] ---
    S-Say, Hayate...
[19:31] ---
    Don't let it bother you so much. I also...
[19:38] ---
    Th-This is bad.
[19:40] ---
    Now that I'm face-to-face with him,
    I feel self-conscious all over again.
[19:43] ---
    But this is Christmas, after all...
[19:48] ---
    We're going to take a little detour.
[19:50] ---
    What?
[19:51] ---
    Christmas Cakes
[19:52] ---
    M-Merry Christmas! Everyone,
    please buy a cake!
[19:57] ---
    Wait a minute.
[19:58] ---
    Could it be that if these don't
    sell, I'll get to keep them all?
[20:04] ---
    Um, Miss, what are we doing here?
[20:07] ---
    You remember this, right?
[20:09] ---
    Yes, of course.
[20:10] ---
    In this past year, I've
    grown a great deal, too.
[20:15] ---
    Behold! I can even buy this
    "warm" thing myself now!
[20:20] ---
    Hayate, this is for you!
[20:23] ---
    What?
[20:24] ---
    Just accept it!
[20:27] ---
    See? We were unable to obtain
    this "warmth" that time,
[20:31] ---
    but here it is now, in our hands.
[20:35] ---
    This is the year that you
    and I have spent together.
[20:39] ---
    Thank you for all the "warm" days.
[20:42] ---
    Miss...
[20:44] ---
    Merry Christmas, Hayate.
[20:47] ---
    A Merry Christmas to you, Miss.
[20:53] ---
    Miss, what is the matter?
[20:56] ---
    Could it be that you've grown sleepy already?
[21:01] ---
    Ouch!
[21:02] ---
    What was that for, Miss?!
[21:04] ---
    I swear! You are just so...!
[21:07] ---
    P-Please wait, Miss!
[21:18] ---
    Nagi and my dear Hayate certainly
    are taking a long time.
[21:21] ---
    Seriously. After we prepared this
    private gatherin' for 'em, too.
[21:24] ---
    Let's just dig in already.
[21:27] ---
    Oh, no, you don't, Young Sir.
[21:39] ---
    Ladies and gentlemen watching
    "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[21:42] ---
    thank you for your support thus far.
[21:44] ---
    Starting next time, we will
    also have a fresh look
[21:47] ---
    and we will bring you the 4th half-season
    of "Hayate the Combat Butler".
[21:51] ---
    Waratte lun-lun-lun
    Smile lun-lun-lun
[21:53] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu naita hi mo
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu even on a day I've cried
[21:57] ---
    Sawagu kaze ni yureru egao kokoro hareteku
    A smile wavers in the wind and clears my heart
[22:03] ---
    Kyou mo lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    Today again lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[22:06] ---
    Taiyou no shita de kimi to odoru kimagure na dansu
    A whimsical dance with you under the sun
[22:20] ---
    Nanige-naku sashi-dasu te ni mitorete
    Riveted by the hand you've casually offered
[22:25] ---
    Tsugi no kotoba maigo ni natchau no
    My next words become lost
[22:32] ---
    Otonabite tsutsumi-komu manazashi ni
    The mature gaze that envelopes me
[22:37] ---
    Tsuyogari wasurete-yuku
    Makes me forget my bravado
[22:42] ---
    Sotto furetete nemurenai yoru no nagai toki mo
    Keep that soft touch on long sleepless nights
[22:48] ---
    Yume kara sameta bakari no hoho ni mo
    And on my cheek, just awakened from a dream
[22:54] ---
    Lun-lun-lun
    Lun-lun-lun
[22:55] ---
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu tsun to shita
    Lala-lun-lun-lulu that hoity profile
[23:00] ---
    Yokogao hora atto iu ma waratteru desho?
    Look, there's a smile there already, see?
[23:04] ---
    Sora to lun-lun-lun mawarun-lun-lulu
    With the sky lun-lun-lun turning lun-lun-lulu
[23:04] ---
    Kimi ga fukasu kaze no naka
    In a breeze of your making
[23:12] ---
    Odoru hidamari no dansu
    A dance in a sunny spot
[23:25] ---
    Nagi and...
[23:26] ---
    Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report!
[23:28] ---
    
[23:29] ---
    I'm Nagi Sanzenin, and my
    dream is being creative!
[23:30] ---
    I'm Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:32] ---
    We've arrived at the final episode of
    the Hayate the Combat Butler anime!
[23:34] ---
    Thank you all for your support! Please
    look forward to our next project!
[23:37] ---
    Miss, the show isn't over yet!
[23:39] ---
    It's just like a certain hermit once said,
    "We're gonna keep going a little longer."
[23:42] ---
    Oh, is that true? How annoying.
[23:44] ---
    Starting next time, defying all expectations,
    Hayate the Combat Butler enters it's next cour!
[23:48] ---
    I'm going to keep working hard to be
    a first-rate butler for you, miss!
[23:51] ---
    O-oh! Well, I'm counting on you, Hayate.
[23:53] ---
    Haiyaya!
SIGN    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Hayate!
[23:58] ---
    What's the matter, miss?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:59] ---
    I'd like to see the first sunrise of the new
    year at a place with a pretty view of the sea.
[24:02] ---
    Just the two of us!
[24:04] ---
    I'm not sure I see the point.
[24:06] ---
    It's going to be really cold out.
[24:07] ---
    Shut up, stupid!
[24:08] ---
    Stop your whining and get ready!
[24:10] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:12] ---
    New Year's Food is Good,
    But Have Some Hayate, Too
[24:12] ---
    "New Year's Food is Good,
    But Have Some Hayate, Too"
[24:14] ---
    Did you know? In Vietnam,
    it's supposed to be good luck
[24:17] ---
    to eat watermelon on New
    Year's! And in Hong Kong,
[24:20] ---
    it's traditional to give New
    Years gifts to adults, too!

40 - New Year's Food is Good. but Have Some Hayate, Too

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:11] ---
    A Happy New Year to you!
[00:15] ---
    For the first episode of the
    year, we will start with...
SIGN    Hayate the Combat Butler! Annual New Year Hidden Talent Contest
[00:18] ---
    "Hayate the Combat Butler! Annual..."
[00:20] ---
    Actually, "First"...
[00:21] ---
    "New Year Hidden Talent Contest"!
[00:25] ---
    Is it all right that the host isn't Machaaki?
[00:27] ---
    Looks like we're reusing the set from
    "Burst of Laughter On-Air Battle".
[00:31] ---
    And now, first up is...
[00:32] ---
    Red Team, a live performance
    on various instruments
[00:35] ---
    and leaping through a ring of fire!
[00:39] ---
    Hot! Hot!
[00:41] ---
    10 points! 10 points! 10
    points! 10 points! 10 points!
[00:43] ---
    Next up is the White Team!
[00:44] ---
    Foreign language comedy routine and
    leaping through a ring of fire!
[00:47] ---
    "Enough's enough!"
[00:47] ---
    This is unreasonable! Impossible!
[00:49] ---
    This is cruel! The logic is ill!
[00:51] ---
    10 points! 10 points! 10
    points! 10 points! 10 points!
[00:53] ---
    Head Judge
[00:54] ---
    A word, please, Head Judge.
[00:55] ---
    It's so idiotic.
[00:56] ---
    Are there only stupid shows
    like this on during New Year's?
[01:00] ---
    After all, they even say, "New Year's
    food is good, but have some curry, too."
[01:03] ---
    Oh, as I recall, we have
    a new show starting today.
[01:06] ---
    Indeed?
[01:06] ---
    Gale Force Squadron
    Hayate the Combat Butler
    Giant
[01:07] ---
    "Hayate the Combat Butler - Giant"!
[01:10] ---
    Animation Produced by
    Synergy SP
[01:12] ---
    "Giant"? Does that mean
    you're going to become big?
SIGN    Special Skills
SIGN    Photography: Eiichi Terada
SIGN    Art: Toshiko Kaizu
SIGN    Editing: Keiko Onodera
SIGN    Color Coordinator: Kayo Ohno
[01:15] ---
    That would be like that old show
    that tried to get more viewers
SIGN    Director: Keiichiro Kawaguchi
SIGN    Animation Director: Takashi Uchida
[01:17] ---
    and pointlessly gigantified
    their normal-sized hero...
SIGN    Storyboards:
    Episode Director: Shinichi Watanabe
[01:18] ---
    Shut up!
[01:19] ---
    It's Silver Mask!
[01:20] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[01:22] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[01:27] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[01:31] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[01:34] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[01:36] ---
    and both have a bit of the
    wrong idea about each other,
[01:38] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[01:44] ---
    Happy New Year.
[01:46] ---
    "Hayate the Combat Butler –
    Giant!" is about to begin.
[01:48] ---
    Wrong!
[01:49] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:51] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:54] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:00] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[02:05] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[02:10] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[02:16] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naive and honest!
[02:22] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[02:27] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[02:32] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[02:38] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[02:44] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[02:46] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[02:49] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[02:54] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[02:57] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[03:00] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[03:18] ---
    New Year's Food is Good,
    But Have Some Hayate, Too
[03:22] ---
    On the night of New Year's Eve...
[03:24] ---
    The year is about to come to a close.
[03:27] ---
    How about going on the year's
    first trip to a shrine?
[03:28] ---
    What?
[03:29] ---
    Staying cooped up at home, steeped in
    manga, online games, and lame anime.
[03:33] ---
    That is the proud, world-renowned way
    that Japan celebrates New Year's!
[03:37] ---
    Well, you have a point, but...
[03:42] ---
    You've regained your memory!
[03:43] ---
    Oh, right. I got swallowed up
    by the Bartra Space-Time Current
[03:47] ---
    and got flung all the way to Kujukuri!
[03:51] ---
    Look, Diomitis, it's the dawn of mankind.
[03:54] ---
    Come to think of it, this is
    the year's first sunrise...
[03:58] ---
    "To think the first sunrise I
    saw with my destined partner
[04:00] ---
    "was the first sunrise of the year...
[04:02] ---
    "Oh, how romantic!"
[04:04] ---
    That's not bad.
[04:07] ---
    Songs change with the times and
    the times change the songs.
[04:09] ---
    Man, I guess this year is almost over.
[04:12] ---
    A lot sure has happened since
    I came to this residence.
[04:15] ---
    Well, it's passed without mishap and
    I owe it all to the Miss taking me in.
[04:19] ---
    I should be grateful.
[04:21] ---
    Wow, I feel embarrassed when you
    say it so candidly like that.
[04:24] ---
    What?!
[04:25] ---
    Whoa! M-Miss?! Where did you come from?!
[04:28] ---
    Or rather, what are you doing here?
[04:31] ---
    Well, uh, it's nothing big, but...
[04:33] ---
    Blush
[04:34] ---
    I was thinking I'd kind of like
    to see the Asahi (sunrise)...
[04:37] ---
    Huh? But I only have a copy
    of the Tokyo Sports here...
[04:39] ---
    The UFO stories on the front page
    pique my curiosity sometimes.
[04:43] ---
    WHAM
[04:44] ---
    I see, I see. That's the head that
    comes up with these stupid jokes.
[04:48] ---
    Pardon me...
[04:49] ---
    Darn it, you just don't get it!
[04:51] ---
    I'm saying I want to go see the first
    sunrise on a pretty beach somewhere!
[04:55] ---
    Just you and me!
[04:57] ---
    Huh? What's the point in going to see that?
[04:59] ---
    Shut up, you jerk! Quit
    complaining and get ready!
[05:02] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[05:04] ---
    Um, could it be that we're bicycling there?
[05:08] ---
    Yes! We're keeping this a secret
    from Klaus and the others,
[05:10] ---
    so we can't go by car or chopper, right?
[05:15] ---
    Uh, you said we were going to the beach,
[05:17] ---
    but where are we specifically going?
[05:19] ---
    Kujukuri Beach!
SIGN    Ocean
SIGN    Kujukuri Beach
[05:23] ---
    What's wrong?
[05:24] ---
    Um, even roughly speaking,
SIGN    Nerima
[05:26] ---
    it's at least 100km from this
    mansion to Kujukuri Beach.
SIGN    Roughly 100km
[05:30] ---
    Wouldn't you be able to
    make it in about an hour?
[05:33] ---
    A-An hour would be...
[05:34] ---
    I see.
[05:35] ---
    Well, we just have to get there by
    sunrise, so we can take it slow.
[05:37] ---
    W-Wouldn't it still be better
    to take Maria and the others
[05:39] ---
    and make the trip with everyone?
[05:41] ---
    Hahahaha
[05:41] ---
    Taking a car or a chopper?
[05:43] ---
    I am saying that I want to go
    with you, just the two of us.
[05:46] ---
    Or what? Do you have a problem
    with being alone with me?!
[05:49] ---
    Goodness, no!
[05:52] ---
    Riding tandem on bicycles
    is against the traffic laws,
[05:55] ---
    but most of Nerima Ward is the
    Sanzenin family's private property,
[05:58] ---
    so it's not a problem.
[06:00] ---
    This anime certainly puts
    convenience above all else.
[06:02] ---
    It's what's called "the adult circumstances".
[06:04] ---
    But to think my parents foisted
    off a debt of 150 million on me
[06:07] ---
    and I almost got taken to an overseas
    resort by "very generous people"...
[06:12] ---
    It's hard to believe it really happened.
[06:13] ---
    Because they really *are
    *Nunbelievable situations.
[06:16] ---
    Th-That's true.
[06:17] ---
    But well, we were able to
    meet thanks to that, so...
[06:20] ---
    Y-Yes...
[06:22] ---
    B-By the way, Hayate,
[06:25] ---
    d-does this bicycle have
    heating or something?
[06:28] ---
    Pardon?
[06:29] ---
    My legs are starting to feel chilled...
[06:31] ---
    Th-That's a bit...
[06:33] ---
    It looks like your plan to
    ride tandem on a bicycle
[06:35] ---
    in the middle of this winter night
    to go all the way to the beach
[06:38] ---
    was a bit problematic.
[06:39] ---
    What?! It is not problematic!
[06:42] ---
    If I had just instrumentalized my skirt more,
[06:44] ---
    the plan would have been perfect.
[06:47] ---
    Now, now, you're going to catch a cold.
[06:51] ---
    We still have a long way to go,
[06:52] ---
    so perhaps we should come up with
    a new instrumentality project.
[06:55] ---
    True...
[06:57] ---
    This is the legendary diamond-pearl card,
[06:59] ---
    which is one step above the
    black card that has no limit.
[07:02] ---
    Uh, but no matter how
    amazing the credit card is,
[07:04] ---
    only convenience stores and Don Quixote
    discount stores are open at this hour.
[07:07] ---
    W-Welcome.
[07:08] ---
    Welcome!
[07:10] ---
    No way! I mean, this is...
[07:12] ---
    Takatan Department Store
[07:13] ---
    ...a super prestigious high
    class department store!
[07:15] ---
    It's not normally open at this hour!
[07:18] ---
    Put it all on this card.
[07:19] ---
    With pleasure!
[07:21] ---
    BAM
[07:23] ---
    Miss, wh-what is this?
[07:25] ---
    You sure are ignorant. Don't you
    know what a covered carriage is?
[07:28] ---
    I mean, aren't these usually
    drawn by an ox or something?
[07:30] ---
    They even hitched it up for free.
[07:32] ---
    Ox?!
[07:34] ---
    Nagi? Nagi?
[07:36] ---
    Where could she have gone?
[07:39] ---
    And Hayate isn't here, either.
[07:41] ---
    Oh?
[07:42] ---
    There she goes again, reading manga
    and leaving it lying around...
[07:45] ---
    "The Romance of Kujukuri"...
[07:48] ---
    Don't tell me...
[07:49] ---
    "Shiwasu", the twelfth month...
[07:51] ---
    It means that everyone is
    busy at the end of the year
[07:54] ---
    and that even teachers are running around.
[07:55] ---
    And...
[07:58] ---
    ZWINNNNNNGGGGG
[07:59] ---
    ...the butler-in-debt was also running.
[08:03] ---
    Inertial drift!
[08:06] ---
    For your information, this anime
    is staying within the speed limit.
[08:08] ---
    Ah! You're amazing, Hayate!
[08:10] ---
    You are unsurpassed on the
    Metropolitan Expressway!
[08:11] ---
    Yes! At this point...
[08:13] ---
    ...no one can catch up to me
    with my boosters at full power!
[08:18] ---
    But is it all right for us to be bicycling
    on the Metropolitan Expressway?
[08:20] ---
    Ah! I'm glad I bought up the
    Metropolitan Expressway.
[08:24] ---
    Adult circumstances.
[08:25] ---
    Yup, yup.
[08:31] ---
    Passing signal?!
[08:33] ---
    At night on the Expressway, this
    indicates that the race is on.
[08:42] ---
    H-Hayate...
[08:44] ---
    I know. The miracle is still to come!
[08:47] ---
    What shall we do, Maicule?
[08:49] ---
    Chitt, I have faith in you!
[08:54] ---
    Not a soul...
[08:57] ---
    ...shall be permitted to run ahead of me!
[09:00] ---
    VROOOM
[09:05] ---
    I can see time!
[09:08] ---
    That's 600R, the high speed turn of death!
[09:10] ---
    I'll make him disappear from my
    rearview mirror with this turn!
[09:13] ---
    Not that he has a rearview mirror.
[09:15] ---
    The probability of going in at full
    throttle and clearing it is 27.8%.
[09:21] ---
    Chitt, I have faith in...
[09:23] ---
    Maicule, please don't spill.
[09:26] ---
    Can I make it?
[09:28] ---
    Secret technique, ditch hooking!
[09:33] ---
    Maicule, what do you want to do?! Maicule?!
[09:35] ---
    All right, Chitt! Fire the rocket boosters!
[09:38] ---
    This is madness! Or rather, you're an idiot!
[09:39] ---
    Are you an idiot?!
[09:41] ---
    Knight Foundation
[09:41] ---
    Maicule?! Maicule?!
[09:41] ---
    A single man will change the world!
[09:43] ---
    Maicule!
[09:46] ---
    Youthful mistakes are so hard to admit to.
[09:50] ---
    This anime is totally staying
    within the speed limit.
[09:58] ---
    Ah! It's pitch black, but we're at the beach!
[10:02] ---
    It's the beach! It's the beach!
[10:05] ---
    I've reached my limit...
[10:06] ---
    It looks like we'll be able to watch
    the first sunrise together now.
[10:10] ---
    It's the beach!
[10:13] ---
    I-I'll go buy something
    warm for the time being.
[10:17] ---
    Sure. I'll be waiting right here.
[10:19] ---
    It's the beach!
[10:21] ---
    Wait, now that I think about it,
    I don't have my wallet with me.
[10:27] ---
    Here you are.
[10:28] ---
    M-Maria!
[10:31] ---
    Even for you,
[10:33] ---
    going at such speeds with someone
    riding in the back is dangerous.
[10:37] ---
    P-Pardon me. I ended up going
    just under the speed limit.
[10:41] ---
    Well, we'll retrieve the bicycle and
    that ridiculous covered carriage,
[10:45] ---
    so please use that money to
    get yourselves back home.
[10:49] ---
    Thank you so much for everything.
[10:54] ---
    Not at all. I'm the one who
    should be thanking you.
[10:58] ---
    You're doing wonderfully,
    protecting and guiding Nagi.
[11:02] ---
    Though, that's not to say
    there aren't some problems...
[11:04] ---
    No, I'm still far from such...
[11:06] ---
    She seems happy since you came...
[11:11] ---
    I also...
[11:14] ---
    Oh, also...
[11:16] ---
    Happy New Year, Hayate.
[11:21] ---
    H-Happy New Year.
[11:24] ---
    I look forward to another year with you.
[11:26] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[11:37] ---
    Miss! It's almost sunrise!
[11:40] ---
    Here you are. Red bean soup. And Happy New...
[11:49] ---
    ...Year...
[12:13] ---
    Happy New Year,
[12:16] ---
    Miss.
[12:21] ---
    Shall we play a game of karuta cards?
    (Karuta-asobi demo shimashou ka?)
[12:25] ---
    Karuta cards, huh? What a drag.
    (Karuta ka? Kattaru.)
[12:28] ---
    On the night of New Year's day...
[12:31] ---
    Somewhere along the way,
    we got a lot of snow...
[12:33] ---
    We got silvery landscape in no time at all!
[12:36] ---
    Sakuya also called to say she would
    be coming for a New Year's visit.
[12:39] ---
    What? Saku is coming?
[12:41] ---
    Before we get to that, why are you
    the only one who's dressed up?
[12:43] ---
    It's fine, isn't it?
[12:45] ---
    We're not doing anything
    else New Year's-like anyway.
[12:47] ---
    New Year's...
[12:49] ---
    People are experiencing heavy
    snowfall all over the world...
[12:51] ---
    Freakish weather...
[12:53] ---
    We live in an era where we can't
    remain complacent forever.
[12:56] ---
    Mankind must rethink its
    culture of mass consumption
[12:58] ---
    in favor of the environment...
[13:00] ---
    When you say that in a comfortably
    heated room, playing a portable game,
[13:02] ---
    you have zero credibility.
[13:04] ---
    It's portable, so it's contributing
    to the environmental cause...
[13:07] ---
    Oh, dear! Is it a power outage?
[13:09] ---
    Um, are you two all right?
[13:12] ---
    Oh, Hayate. I'm fine, but Nagi is...
[13:17] ---
    I-It got dark all of a sudden, so...
[13:19] ---
    I see. The snow must have
    taken down some power lines.
[13:22] ---
    Normally, the backup generator
    should kick in, but...
[13:25] ---
    Maybe the breaker's tripped on the
    backup generator in the other building.
[13:28] ---
    The breaker will need to be reset manually.
[13:30] ---
    Then hurry up and do something
    about this breaker thing.
[13:34] ---
    I'm going to die if it stays this dark.
[13:37] ---
    Miss...
[13:38] ---
    So, would you please do something about this
[13:41] ---
    before the batteries run out on the
    game she's playing to distract herself?
[13:44] ---
    Roger that!
[13:47] ---
    The time left is approximately 3 hours.
[13:49] ---
    My mission this time is to restore power.
[13:52] ---
    The target location:
[13:53] ---
    the generator station, approximately
    1km from the main house.
[13:56] ---
    Whatever the case,
[13:58] ---
    I haven't had such a butler-like job in ages!
[14:00] ---
    I have to do my best!
[14:01] ---
    Incidentally, there's a
    blizzard raging outside.
[14:01] ---
    ROOOOAAAARRRR
[14:04] ---
    Holy...
[14:05] ---
    I-It's blustering worse than I'd thought...
[14:08] ---
    Even though we're in Tokyo... in Nerima...
[14:10] ---
    Could this be what they call
    "tsudere (snooty softy)"?
[14:12] ---
    Earth sure is a "tsudere".
[14:14] ---
    That would be what they call a "tundra".
[14:16] ---
    Incidentally, a "tsudere" is...
[14:18] ---
    W-Well, I guess I'll see how it goes anyway.
[14:22] ---
    I am not going anywhere,
[14:25] ---
    so please just don't pull that, all right?
[14:27] ---
    Or it'll become an "Oh, dear!" situation.
[14:29] ---
    Earlier, you said something
    about Saku coming?
[14:31] ---
    Oh, come to think of it, she hasn't shown up.
[14:33] ---
    It'd be funny if she got
    stranded out there in the yard.
[14:37] ---
    No, not funny. Not funny.
[14:38] ---
    B-But...
[14:40] ---
    ...I feel like I might really get
    stranded out in this blizzard!
[14:44] ---
    But this is for the Miss,
    cowering in the darkness.
[14:47] ---
    I must restore the power at all costs!
[14:49] ---
    I can't give up!
[14:51] ---
    I can't allow myself to give up!
[14:53] ---
    Snow like this...
[14:55] ---
    Like hell this snow's going to get me down!
[15:01] ---
    Wait, this is a snowmaking machine!
[15:04] ---
    And what are you doing out here?!
[15:07] ---
    Ah...
[15:08] ---
    "Wait, this here's a snowmakin' machine!"
[15:11] ---
    Nice! That was a nice jab.
[15:13] ---
    Don't tell me you've been out here
    in this fricking cold just for that?
[15:18] ---
    Well, somethin' like that.
[15:21] ---
    "Nice jab!" What point
    is there in doing that?
[15:24] ---
    He's good!
[15:25] ---
    Where are your butlers?
[15:27] ---
    Oh, when I drew power for
    this guy from the power line,
[15:31] ---
    they said the lights went out in the
    main house, so they scurried off.
[15:34] ---
    This guy is what caused the power outage?
[15:37] ---
    Sorry.
[15:39] ---
    At any rate, you'll catch a cold
    if you say out here forever.
[15:43] ---
    Please get inside the residence quickly.
[15:46] ---
    Well, I'd love to,
[15:49] ---
    but which way's the residence?
[15:55] ---
    We might seriously die, huh?
[15:57] ---
    ROOOOAAAARRRR
[15:59] ---
    At any rate, this is not
    some snow-covered mountain!
[16:02] ---
    Things will work out!
[16:03] ---
    Please come with me.
[16:05] ---
    What's this? Yer more
    dependable than I'd thought.
[16:09] ---
    And an hour passed.
[16:11] ---
    ROOOAAARRR
[16:12] ---
    Um, mind if I take back
    everythin' I said earlier?
[16:15] ---
    M-May I ask you to wait just a little longer?
[16:18] ---
    What?!
[16:20] ---
    A yeti?! It's a snowman!
[16:22] ---
    This is perfect!
[16:24] ---
    I'll go ask him for directions real quick.
[16:25] ---
    A snowman may know the snowy roads well.
[16:33] ---
    He was kind enough to tell me.
[16:35] ---
    What?
[16:36] ---
    I take back what I said 'bout
    takin' what I said back.
[16:38] ---
    He's done better than I thought.
[16:39] ---
    Generator Station
[16:39] ---
    This be the generator station.
[16:41] ---
    My coat's drenched.
[16:43] ---
    I know. We've literally "gotten wet".
[16:47] ---
    Oh, it's taken longer than I'd thought,
[16:50] ---
    so I need to hurry up and reset the
    breaker and switch to the backup.
[16:55] ---
    But man, this place is shielded from
    the wind, but it's still mega cold.
[16:59] ---
    Oh, so it's an independent
    geothermal power generator.
[17:02] ---
    It looks like there's a
    hot spring here as well,
[17:05] ---
    so perhaps it might be a
    good idea to take a dip.
[17:07] ---
    A hot spring? I...
[17:07] ---
    Blush
[17:10] ---
    Takin' a dip in a hot spring in a
    place like this, just the two of us...
[17:13] ---
    It'd be too embarrassin'.
[17:18] ---
    Why would that be?
[17:20] ---
    Guide Map
[17:20] ---
    What was that for?
[17:22] ---
    Shaddup, ya moron! That one
    seriously ticked me off!
[17:25] ---
    As I asked before, why?
[17:26] ---
    Wanna go at it for another round?!
[17:26] ---
    Hot Spring
    "Zapping Bath"
[17:27] ---
    Hey, c'mere for a sec!
[17:34] ---
    As I said, what was that for?!
[17:37] ---
    Shaddup!
[17:39] ---
    P-Please stop!
[17:41] ---
    Shut yer mouth!
[17:45] ---
    How d'ya like that? Learn yer lesson yet?
[17:48] ---
    I don't mean to keep repeating
    myself, but what is this about?
[17:50] ---
    I might not look it, but I'm still
    the eldest girl 'round here,
[17:53] ---
    so don't treat me too much like a kid.
[17:56] ---
    Coming from someone who does things
    like this without hesitation...
[17:59] ---
    What d'ya say?! I'll show ya!
[18:01] ---
    I was kidding!
[18:03] ---
    I'm not treating you like a kid.
[18:07] ---
    Huh?
[18:10] ---
    Y-Ya aren't?
[18:12] ---
    This situation's definitely not good...
[18:21] ---
    I feel like I'm gettin' dizzy from the heat.
[18:23] ---
    But what shall we do?
[18:25] ---
    The breaker is located pretty far from here.
[18:28] ---
    Drenched as I am, I might freeze
    to death before I get there.
[18:32] ---
    But I cannot leave the
    Miss waiting any longer!
[18:36] ---
    Sorry. Want me to come with, too?
[18:39] ---
    No, I think that might not
    exactly be advisable...
[18:44] ---
    I mean, you are technically a girl...
[18:54] ---
    Well, I'll be going then.
[18:58] ---
    Oh, is that the waterproof cell phone
    that Kimutaku's been advertising?
[19:04] ---
    Oh, Makita? Is Kunieda there, too?
[19:07] ---
    2 hours and 50 minutes
    since the mission started.
[19:09] ---
    5 meters left to the breaker room!
[19:11] ---
    However, the drenched butler-in-debt
    was on the brink of mortal peril.
[19:19] ---
    This is bad...
[19:21] ---
    I'm so cold, things are
    starting to look blurry.
[19:23] ---
    Maybe going naked would've
    been better after all.
[19:26] ---
    But that would be sketchy
    in terms of your appearance.
[19:28] ---
    I-I'm going to die at this rate...
[19:33] ---
    But... just a little longer...
[19:36] ---
    I'm so close to restoring
    power for the Miss...
[19:41] ---
    But I'm just... Miss...
[19:46] ---
    Oh, dear! The flame in the lamp...
[19:48] ---
    What?!
[19:49] ---
    Don't tell me Hayate's...
[19:50] ---
    Could something have happened to Hayate?
[19:53] ---
    My Galadriel is dead!
[19:56] ---
    As I suspected, this must mean...
[19:57] ---
    I believe that's simply because
    you weren't paying attention.
[20:00] ---
    Oh, the lights!
[20:02] ---
    Ah!
[20:05] ---
    Which means Hayate is fine!
[20:07] ---
    But Galadriel is dead.
[20:15] ---
    I managed to reset the breakers somehow,
[20:18] ---
    but I've got no strength left in me...
[20:20] ---
    Oh, man. I'm so cold...
[20:24] ---
    I can't take another step.
[20:27] ---
    Miss..
[20:29] ---
    Maria...
[20:32] ---
    I was so... happy...
[20:42] ---
    Hayate!
[20:43] ---
    Ya can't give up! Get it together!
[20:46] ---
    Sakuya...
[20:49] ---
    I came to save ya.
[20:51] ---
    You'll be fine now.
[20:53] ---
    Look at how cold ya are!
[20:56] ---
    Your hands are incredibly warm...
[21:04] ---
    Ya hung in there real good.
[21:06] ---
    I had the wrong idea 'bout ya.
[21:08] ---
    Yer quite the go-getter, aren't ya?
[21:11] ---
    Yes, but...
[21:13] ---
    With it being winter and all, I'm
    "sleet" and tired of the cold...
[21:18] ---
    Or something like that.
[21:27] ---
    Generator Station
[21:28] ---
    Makita! Kunieda! We're
    leavin' that moron here!
[21:31] ---
    Roger that.
[21:32] ---
    What?!
[21:33] ---
    W-Wait! Sakuya!
[21:37] ---
    Oh, the lamp...
[21:38] ---
    Galadriel is still totally dead.
[21:41] ---
    But I wonder if Hayate really is all right.
[21:45] ---
    And thus, New Year's Day came to an end.
[21:48] ---
    Next time, they will fight
    against a sudden farewell.
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:16] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:25] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:42] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:52] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:26] ---
    Nagi and...
[23:26] ---
    Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report!
[23:29] ---
    Power Come Forth! I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:31] ---
    I'm Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:33] ---
    Lots of new developments this time around!
     The arrival of new enemies have certainly made things intense.
[23:37] ---
    There's going to be a mysterious
    new rival showing up next time.
[23:39] ---
    The plan is for them to be good guys by the
    final episode and help fight the great evil!
[23:43] ---
    Miss, did you actually watch this episode?
[23:45] ---
    It was nothing like that!
[23:47] ---
    Oh, it wasn't?
[23:48] ---
    The new cour is supposed to be full of
    stories that fans of the manga will be happy to see!
[23:52] ---
    I'm not sure how much I believe that.
[23:54] ---
    Seeya!
SIGN    Preview
[23:58] ---
    Good morning!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Hey, now, if you get too absorbed
    in your chat you're gonna be late!
[24:02] ---
    S-something is different about Ms. Katsura!
[24:05] ---
    Something about her is radiant...
[24:06] ---
    Life is tender, and full
    of sudden goodbyes, y'know?
[24:10] ---
    You're being so stupid!
[24:11] ---
    I don't care what happens to you!
    Go die in a ditch, somewhere!
[24:14] ---
    Next time, "Despairing Goodbye to the Teacher
    ~A Graduation Special"
[24:17] ---
    Be ready to Jack On with Hayate
    the Combat Butler next time!
[24:21] ---
    

41 - Goodbye Teacher, Despair - Graduation Special

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:14] ---
    Then we'll see you later, Maria.
[00:15] ---
    See you later.
[00:17] ---
    Oh, yeah, Maria.
[00:18] ---
    If you have time, go rent the DVDs
    listed here from Wataru's store.
[00:23] ---
    I understand.
[00:24] ---
    It's cold, so please be careful.
[00:27] ---
    It's not a problem!
    I have that taken care of!
[00:32] ---
    It really is cold.
[00:34] ---
    Huh? What the? Where's the Miss?
[00:38] ---
    Hey, don't turn around!
    I'll be directly in the wind!
[00:42] ---
    What?!
[00:45] ---
    You're very resourceful, Miss.
[00:49] ---
    Good morning, Hinagiku.
[00:52] ---
    What's wrong? You're all spaced out.
[00:54] ---
    Hinagiku!
[00:56] ---
    Oh!
[00:57] ---
    I'm sorry. There's
    something on my mind, so...
[01:00] ---
    What?!
[01:01] ---
    Could it be that walking disaster
    sprinkler of a superintendent
[01:04] ---
    has been up to no good again?!
[01:06] ---
    Oh, that woman should
    be enjoying her vacation
[01:08] ---
    on a tropical island right about now.
[01:24] ---
    Here you are, Mistress Kuzuha. Say, "Ah!"
[01:30] ---
    But surely we didn't have to do
    the New Year's Breaking of the Mochi
[01:33] ---
    all the way out here...
[01:35] ---
    Well, it's for good luck, after all.
[01:38] ---
    Th-Then, what in the world...
[01:41] ---
    Actually, my sis gave me New Year's money.
[01:44] ---
    What?!
[01:45] ---
    Miss Katsura gave you New Year's money?!
SIGN    New Year's Money To Hinagiku From Sis
[01:49] ---
    She came over to the house yesterday
    and left this on my desk.
[01:53] ---
    I mean, it was just 500 yen in there, but...
[01:56] ---
    500 yen?!
[01:56] ---
    Oh, that's all?
[01:57] ---
    Th-That's a fortune!
[02:00] ---
    All I ever got every year
    was red beans or peanuts.
[02:03] ---
    Morning!
[02:08] ---
    Now, now. You're going to be late
    if you're too caught up in chitchat.
[02:12] ---
    You're under arrest!
[02:13] ---
    There, a knock to your noggin.
[02:17] ---
    Sh-She's not her usual self!
[02:19] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[02:21] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[02:26] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[02:30] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[02:33] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[02:35] ---
    and both have a bit of
    the wrong idea about each other,
[02:37] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[02:42] ---
    M-Miss Katsura's acting
    differently than usual!
[02:44] ---
    She's sparkling somehow!
[02:46] ---
    What in the world happened, Sis?!
[02:48] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:51] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:53] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:59] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[03:04] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[03:10] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[03:15] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naive and honest!
[03:21] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[03:26] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[03:31] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[03:37] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[03:43] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[03:45] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[03:48] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[03:53] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[03:56] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[03:59] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[04:17] ---
    Despairing Goodbye to the Teacher
    ~A Graduation Special
[04:25] ---
    What's wrong, you guys?
[04:27] ---
    Well, it's not really anything,
[04:29] ---
    but your Gigantor-esque change
    in personality has us shocked...
[04:32] ---
    Could it be that you went
    and ate some plants
[04:35] ---
    or maybe laughing mushrooms
    from the side of the road?
[04:37] ---
    Oh? Why do you ask?
[04:38] ---
    Wh-Why? Well, because...
[04:42] ---
    It's just...
[04:43] ---
    It's just that today is a very
    special day for me.
[04:48] ---
    A special day?!
[04:49] ---
    Well, it's almost time for the faculty
    morning meeting, so later!
[05:02] ---
    This is...!
[05:05] ---
    What?!
[05:06] ---
    Katsy's quitting being a teacher?!
[05:08] ---
    Yes, that appears to be the case.
[05:11] ---
    What should we do?
[05:14] ---
    Wh-What is so funny?
[05:16] ---
    Because that's just bananas!
[05:18] ---
    Yujiki quitting being
    a teacher is inconceivable.
[05:21] ---
    Yeah, that's right. If she quit,
    where would she live?
[05:24] ---
    But she's clearly been
    acting strangely since morning
[05:27] ---
    and she said today was
    a special day or something.
[05:30] ---
    On top of which, she even
    gave Hinagiku New Year's money.
[05:34] ---
    Perhaps she plans to quit Hakuou
    and go somewhere far away...
[05:37] ---
    Yeah, right!
[05:39] ---
    If that turns out to be true,
    I'll shave my head bald!
[05:42] ---
    I'll change my name to Spicysaltedcodroe!
[05:45] ---
    Then I'll change the title of this anime
    to "Yamabiko the Combat Butler"!
[05:50] ---
    Don't change it without permission!
[05:51] ---
    Well, for example, if you actually
    saw her letter of resignation,
[05:55] ---
    then I'd be convinced.
[05:56] ---
    Yup, yup.
SIGN    Letter of Resignation
SIGN    Letter of Resignation
[06:00] ---
    What?!
[06:02] ---
    N-No way!
[06:03] ---
    I never imagined it could be true!
[06:05] ---
    More like, if you found it,
    tell us that first!
[06:16] ---
    K-Katsy!
[06:18] ---
    Oh? Can I help you with something?
[06:20] ---
    Is the story about quitting true?!
[06:22] ---
    It's a joke, right?!
[06:23] ---
    Tell us it's a joke!
[06:26] ---
    Yes, it's true.
[06:28] ---
    What?!
[06:30] ---
    R-Really?!
[06:32] ---
    Yes, today's the last day.
[06:34] ---
    Today?!
[06:35] ---
    Isn't that sudden?!
[06:37] ---
    I'm sorry.
[06:38] ---
    I don't know, it was just hard
    to bring it up to you guys.
[06:42] ---
    Tell me it's not true, Sis!
[06:45] ---
    Hina.
[06:46] ---
    Come on! What's there to do
    if not teaching?!
[06:51] ---
    There are plenty of things to do out there.
[06:53] ---
    Traveling, starting over in life...
[06:57] ---
    Why?! Why did you keep quiet
    about such an important thing?!
[07:00] ---
    That's right! Don't be
    such a stranger, Katsy!
[07:02] ---
    So true, so true, sauce true!
[07:05] ---
    Why wasn't there any discussion of this?!
[07:08] ---
    As an adult, there's no need
    to discuss every little move like that.
[07:13] ---
    Don't worry. Plenty of thought
    went into this decision.
[07:17] ---
    Miss Katsura!
[07:18] ---
    I'm sorry about catching you
    all unawares, but you see...
[07:24] ---
    Goodbyes have a way of suddenly
    sneaking up on you one day.
[07:31] ---
    It's sad, but life is full
    of sudden goodbyes.
[07:36] ---
    There are no dandelions in winter.
[07:42] ---
    Oh, Marilla, I guess when you're
    truly sad, the tears just won't come.
[07:45] ---
    Sudden goodbyes...
[07:48] ---
    But in exchange,
    I'll never say goodbye to you.
[07:54] ---
    I'm sorry, Matthew,
    but I can't even must a single tear!
[07:57] ---
    Sis, you jerk!
[07:59] ---
    See if I care about you anymore!
[08:01] ---
    Just go die in some ditch somewhere!
[08:04] ---
    H-Hinagiku!
[08:07] ---
    Hina...
[08:38] ---
    Hina, let's go home soon.
[08:44] ---
    Look! Awesome, huh?
    I got all this New Year's money!
[08:48] ---
    Me, too!
[08:49] ---
    Um, this was from Daddy.
    And this one's from Mommy.
[08:52] ---
    This was from Granny.
    And this one was Grandpa!
[08:57] ---
    Hina.
[08:58] ---
    Oh, Sis!
[08:59] ---
    Come to think of it, I still hadn't
    given you your New Year's money, right?
[09:03] ---
    Hold out your hand.
[09:04] ---
    Huh?
[09:07] ---
    Here.
[09:12] ---
    You'll have to let me off
    with that for this year.
[09:16] ---
    But in exchange,
    I'll never say goodbye to you.
[09:21] ---
    Really?!
[09:22] ---
    Of course, by all Maeda's Crackers!
[09:25] ---
    Come on. I'll give you a piggyback ride,
    so let's hurry on home.
[09:27] ---
    Okay!
[09:46] ---
    Sis, you liar!
[09:50] ---
    Oof, off we go.
    (Rukkorase tto.)
[09:55] ---
    I guess ages trumps all.
    (Toshi ni wa katenai no ne.)
[10:02] ---
    I never thought Katsy would seriously quit.
[10:05] ---
    It doesn't seem real.
[10:07] ---
    When all's said and done, she's
    been there for us in so many ways.
[10:10] ---
    How are we to survive the homework
    assignments and tests from now on?
[10:15] ---
    This seems to have come as a great shock...
[10:17] ---
    But something about this bugs me.
[10:20] ---
    What?
[10:21] ---
    She may be capricious,
    but this is on a whole another level.
[10:23] ---
    Perhaps, but there's no disputing the facts.
[10:26] ---
    Aw, man,
[10:28] ---
    I wish we could've had at least one
    more class of Katsy's world history.
[10:32] ---
    Yup, yup.
[10:35] ---
    Oh, yeah.
[10:37] ---
    With the 6th period homeroom next,
    it's goodbye Miss Katsura.
[10:43] ---
    That's it! Homeroom!
[10:48] ---
    Um, then let's get homeroom started.
[10:52] ---
    Um... um... Today's topic is...
[10:55] ---
    Me! Miss Katsura!
[10:57] ---
    There's parts of the rise
    and fall of the Frankish Empire
[10:59] ---
    that I don't understand, so could
    you give us a lecture on that?
[11:02] ---
    What?!
[11:03] ---
    I want an encore of the Reconquista
    during Spain's middle ages!
[11:07] ---
    What were the four apples
    that go down in history again?
[11:10] ---
    Is it true that Pythagoras
    was allergic to broad beans?
[11:14] ---
    Is it true that the inventor
    of instant curry was British?
[11:17] ---
    We have lots of other questions,
    too, so please teach it all to us!
[11:19] ---
    You guys...
[11:22] ---
    All right! You got it!
[11:25] ---
    Yes!
[11:26] ---
    Since it's come to this, we better
    fully enjoy Yukiji's final lecture.
[11:31] ---
    Okay, are you listening?
    This part is key. Key, I tell you.
[11:34] ---
    1806, the Berlin Decree!
    Make sure you get that in your heads!
[11:39] ---
    Mm, Miss Katsura's lectures always
    did move along at a good clip.
[11:43] ---
    She seems irresponsible,
    but she's actually a good teacher.
[11:46] ---
    By the way, did you know
    that Napoleon was into fortune telling?
[11:49] ---
    And she teaches us stuff
    that's not in the textbooks, too.
[11:52] ---
    It was a simple method,
    where he held a coin in his left hand
[11:55] ---
    and flipped a crêpe in a frying pan.
[11:58] ---
    But he did it five times
    and he messed up on the fifth try.
[12:01] ---
    That was the year 1812!
[12:03] ---
    Yup! The year he failed
    in his invasion of Russia!
[12:03] ---
    But I guess we'll never get to attend...
[12:06] ---
    ...these lectures again...
[12:21] ---
    Got it? This part is key, too.
[12:26] ---
    Make sure you check it out
    in your textbooks later.
[12:29] ---
    Oh, by the way,
[12:30] ---
    the reason Napoleon always has his
    right hand in his pocket is because...
[12:33] ---
    Uh, wait. Why are you crying, Miss Segawa?
[12:35] ---
    You idiot! Don't cry!
[12:39] ---
    Th-These aren't tears! They're
    leftover water from last night's bath!
[12:43] ---
    Good!
[12:43] ---
    Huh?
[12:45] ---
    I see, so you guys finally understand.
[12:48] ---
    That history is built
    on layers upon layers of tears!
[12:53] ---
    Saying hello and goodbye,
    and then saying hello again!
[12:55] ---
    It's those connections between
    people that make history!
[12:58] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[13:00] ---
    The kanji for "man" depicts two
    people leaning on each other!
SIGN    Man
[13:04] ---
    Yes! Man cannot live life alone, you see!
[13:07] ---
    We can't live...
[13:09] ---
    ...life alone...
[13:13] ---
    Once Sis is gone, I'll also...
[13:19] ---
    There isn't a soul out there
    who goes through life alone.
[13:23] ---
    Even when people are apart,
    in their hearts, they remain connected.
[13:26] ---
    That's what I believe.
[13:28] ---
    I want you all to understand that, too.
    And please don't forget.
[13:32] ---
    The tears are the sweat of the heart!
[13:35] ---
    And that love is the labor of the heart!
[13:43] ---
    That concludes our class.
[13:45] ---
    Thank you, everyone!
[13:59] ---
    Don't go, Sis!
[14:00] ---
    Please don't quit!
[14:02] ---
    There's still lots more
    that we want to learn!
[14:04] ---
    And lots more fun we want to have!
[14:06] ---
    Ma'am!
[14:06] ---
    Without you, my life would be
    in less danger and it'll be boring!
[14:10] ---
    Wh-What are you all talking about?
[14:12] ---
    Even after all this, are you still
    going to quit and leave us behind?
[14:16] ---
    At least stay with us until we graduate!
[14:19] ---
    Please promise!
[14:22] ---
    Promise?
[14:25] ---
    Could it be that this was...?
[14:27] ---
    Uh, um, you guys...
[14:27] ---
    Please don't quit!
[14:31] ---
    Thank you, everyone!
[14:33] ---
    I had no idea you cared so much
    about me! It makes me so happy!
[14:37] ---
    What?!
[14:40] ---
    Working as a teacher was a lot
    harder than I ever imagined and...
[14:45] ---
    Sorry about this. We've
    got one more place to go to.
[14:48] ---
    What?!
[14:51] ---
    Please get up!
[14:54] ---
    That's why I handed my letter
    of resignation to Miss Katsura.
[14:58] ---
    Letter of resignation?
[14:59] ---
    You don't mean... this?
[15:01] ---
    Oh, that's it!
[15:02] ---
    Oh, uh, sorry about that.
    I forgot to give it to the superintendent.
[15:06] ---
    Thank you very much!
[15:08] ---
    Observing your lecture,
    I was able to realize something.
[15:12] ---
    To realize just how wonderful the bond
    between teacher and student is!
[15:15] ---
    Everyone, please forgive me
    for not seeing how deeply you love me!
[15:20] ---
    Wh-What's going on?
[15:22] ---
    Oh, how touching this is!
[15:26] ---
    Um...
[15:27] ---
    Huh? What?
[15:28] ---
    Um, um, there's a huge storm
    of "why" brewing here...
[15:32] ---
    So, you're not quitting, Yukiji?
[15:35] ---
    Huh? There's no way I'd quit.
[15:38] ---
    What?!
[15:39] ---
    Then what about that unnaturally
    sparkling smiley aura from this morning?
[15:43] ---
    Oh!
[15:44] ---
    Because today's been a super
    lucky day for me since morning!
[15:51] ---
    Shut up!
[15:55] ---
    Here's Mistress Nobuko
    Saeki's fortune for today!
[15:58] ---
    Congratulations! In first
    place come the Scorpios!
[16:01] ---
    Particularly for those of you
    with blood type B, who love to drink,
[16:03] ---
    and whose pinky toe nails are long,
[16:05] ---
    this is a once in a dozen
    years super lucky day!
[16:09] ---
    As if stuff like that's ever accurate.
[16:12] ---
    A l-lucky standing tea leaf!
[16:14] ---
    The egg!
[16:16] ---
    The eyebrows!
SIGN    Rhapsody of the Koalas
SIGN    Choco-balls
[16:18] ---
    The angel!
[16:19] ---
    R-Red snappers!
[16:21] ---
    That's what happened!
    Don't you think it's amazing?!
[16:25] ---
    Uber happy! Super happy!
    I'm totally on a roll!
[16:27] ---
    Wh-What?!
[16:30] ---
    Look, look! These are the actual goods!
[16:32] ---
    No wonder even Napoleon
    believed in fortune telling!
[16:40] ---
    For my stupid sister's numerous
    misleading, bothersome reactions,
[16:44] ---
    I am truly sorry
    for the trouble she's caused!
[16:48] ---
    It seems we jumped to conclusions, too.
[16:50] ---
    I thought it was strange from the start.
[16:53] ---
    What did we cry all those tears for?
[16:56] ---
    We'll make sure to get back at you for this!
[16:58] ---
    Yeah! Give us a free pass
    for 50 years' worth of homework!
[17:01] ---
    Wh-What did I ever do?
[17:04] ---
    I'm never going to
    believe in fortunes again!
[17:06] ---
    And thus, the spinster teacher
    grew ever more dispirited.
[17:11] ---
    Oh?
[17:12] ---
    Then what meaning was there in Miss
    Katsura giving you New Year's money?
[17:19] ---
    That mystery's already been solved.
[17:21] ---
    Damn it. Come at me with everything
    you got. You sons of bitches.
[17:24] ---
    She's so utterly hopeless.
[17:35] ---
    I'll give you real, proper
    New Year's money someday, okay?
[17:38] ---
    When is someday?
[17:40] ---
    Hmm, next year...
[17:42] ---
    No, I'm not quite sure I can make that.
[17:44] ---
    In three years...
[17:45] ---
    Err, well... In ten years...?
[17:49] ---
    I'll get it to you for sure
    by New Year's ten years from now.
[17:52] ---
    Okay!
SIGN    Video Rental V Tachibana
[18:07] ---
    Let's see, "Pirates of Sanriku Coast"
    and "Spider Guy 3", right?
[18:12] ---
    Here!
[18:13] ---
    Thank you, as always.
[18:15] ---
    Tell Nagi to make sure she
    returns them by the due date.
[18:18] ---
    Yes, I understand.
[18:20] ---
    Maria!
[18:21] ---
    Um, if you don't mind,
    please take this with you.
SIGN    Urusai People
[18:24] ---
    Oh, my! But...
[18:25] ---
    Please think nothing of it.
[18:27] ---
    My grandma sent me a massive shipment.
[18:32] ---
    Th-These are...
[18:34] ---
    They're still available?
[18:36] ---
    Or rather, where in the world
    is Saki's grandmother from...?
[18:39] ---
    Oh?
[18:43] ---
    What should I do?
[18:44] ---
    The New Year's card I wrote for Hayate...
[18:46] ---
    I've been trying to decide
    whether to send it or not
[18:48] ---
    and now the New Year's here already.
[18:50] ---
    More like, didn't I decide
    that my resolution for this year
[18:52] ---
    was to become a mature woman,
    brimming with courage?!
SIGN    Happy New Year! Here's to another great year! Ayumu Nishizawa
[18:58] ---
    I can't do it! I'll come again tomorrow!
[19:01] ---
    Ow!
[19:04] ---
    What the hell was that?
[19:05] ---
    Trying to pick a fight, bitch?
[19:07] ---
    What should I do?! What should I do?!
    I think I might get killed!
[19:10] ---
    You listening?!
    I'll beat the crap outta you!
[19:13] ---
    Mess with us and we'll get you good!
[19:14] ---
    Or actually, why do I always get
    into trouble like this?!
[19:15] ---
    You've got some nerve tackling me like that!
[19:19] ---
    Oh, yes, Miss Nishizawa, isn't it?
[19:22] ---
    It is, right? Hayate's friend, as I recall.
[19:25] ---
    You were of great assistance last year
    when you let Nagi stay the night.
[19:29] ---
    Oh, no, um...
[19:31] ---
    As you saw, she can be
    a difficult child in many ways,
[19:34] ---
    but I hope you'll continue
    to be friends with her.
[19:36] ---
    Uh, okay...
[19:38] ---
    Oh? Who are these gentlemen?
[19:41] ---
    Are they your friends?
[19:43] ---
    Wh-Why would you think that?
[19:45] ---
    Who the hell are you?!
[19:47] ---
    You're a maid!
[19:48] ---
    Just 'cause you're a maid
    with some cute looks,
[19:50] ---
    you better not ignore us, you moron!
[19:55] ---
    I'm so sorry. I don't understand Klingon.
[19:59] ---
    That was Japanese, ya moron!
[20:01] ---
    You keep giving us lip
[20:03] ---
    and you won't get away with it,
    no matter how cute a maid you are!
[20:15] ---
    What a boorish man to suddenly attempt
    to grab a woman by the collar.
[20:19] ---
    Wh-What the hell was that?!
[20:22] ---
    That was just Xing Yi Quan.
[20:23] ---
    Though, I only know enough for self-defense
[20:25] ---
    and it's only useful
    for catching someone by surprise.
[20:27] ---
    Damn it!
[20:29] ---
    You're not gonna get away with this!
[20:31] ---
    I would advise you against that.
[20:34] ---
    Or getting injured will be
    the least of your worries.
[20:36] ---
    Shut up!
[20:38] ---
    See?
[20:41] ---
    No! Help!
[20:44] ---
    Were you hurt in any way?
[20:46] ---
    N-No. Thank you very much.
[20:49] ---
    Not at all.
[20:49] ---
    More importantly, about this...
[20:51] ---
    You dropped it.
[20:54] ---
    Th-This is n-n-nothing! Nothing at all!
[21:00] ---
    I will pray that this turns out to be
    a good year for you, Miss Nishizawa.
[21:05] ---
    What?
[21:05] ---
    Oh, yes, if you'd like... Here.
[21:10] ---
    See you then.
[21:25] ---
    "I want to become a woman like her
    this year," thought Miss Nishizawa.
[21:31] ---
    Did anything unusual happen at school?
[21:34] ---
    Not really.
[21:36] ---
    Did anything happen during your day, Maria?
[21:38] ---
    No, nothing of particular
    note for me, either.
[21:42] ---
    But why is it? I suddenly have
    a craving for marshmallows.
[21:47] ---
    Next time, they will battle
    against sine, cosine, and tangent.
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:17] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:26] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:35] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:43] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:53] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
SIGN    Yukiji Katsura's
SIGN     Lettering by Hitomi Nabatame
[23:26] ---
    Yukiji Katsura's...
[23:28] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    Hello! I'm the charming
    female teacher, Yukiji Katsura.
[23:33] ---
    Hey, listen to this, everyone.
    My character song's finally complete!
[23:36] ---
    I was a bit nervous about
    recording for the first time,
[23:38] ---
    but I did my best for my fans!
[23:41] ---
    Hey, Sis, what are you doing?!
[23:43] ---
    Oh, Hina, I didn't know you were here.
[23:44] ---
    Don't tell me you didn't know!
[23:46] ---
    We're doing this segment together,
[23:48] ---
    so we even had a rehearsal
    yesterday, remember?!
[23:49] ---
    Did we?
[23:50] ---
    Well, anyway, Hina even joins me
    on the second song on the disc,
[23:52] ---
    so please make sure you get it.
[23:54] ---
    Oh, the royalty's all mine, okay?
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Doesn't he have any weaknesses or anything?
[23:59] ---
    Weaknesses?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    For the heroes of manga and anime,
[24:02] ---
    they tend to come with
    weaknesses by default, you know?
[24:04] ---
    I see... Is that how it works?
[24:06] ---
    The butler-in-debt's weakness, huh?
[24:08] ---
    All right, leave it to me!
[24:09] ---
    Guys like him sometimes have
    the most unexpected weaknesses!
[24:12] ---
    Next time, "Like a Dog,
    a Mouse and a Bulldog".
[24:16] ---
    I have a good idea.
[24:17] ---
    What's this good idea?
[24:19] ---
    That is...
[24:20] ---
    Like a Dog, a Mouse, and a Bulldog
[24:20] ---
    Borg Get On to "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" again next time!

42 - Like a Dog, a Mouse, and a Bulldog

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
SIGN    Sixteen Years Ago
[00:18] ---
    He'll be Hayate.
[00:19] ---
    His name will be Hayate.
[00:22] ---
    Let's name him Hayate.
[00:24] ---
    My, what a wonderful name.
[00:26] ---
    But why?
[00:27] ---
    The reason's obvious, isn't it, Dear?
[00:30] ---
    Because I want him to grow up strong,
[00:32] ---
    so he can run like the gale
    (hayate) away from bill collectors.
[00:35] ---
    Wow, that a fantastic name!
[00:38] ---
    It is, right? I'm a genius!
[00:41] ---
    No matter when we have to
    abandon our child to go on the run,
[00:43] ---
    we'll have nothing to worry about now.
[00:44] ---
    Dear, you really are something else!
[00:48] ---
    Thus named Hayate,
[00:50] ---
    the boy's destiny was thrust
    upon him from the day he was born
[00:53] ---
    to become absolutely perfect at everything.
[00:56] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[00:58] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[01:03] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[01:07] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[01:10] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[01:12] ---
    and both have a bit of the
    wrong idea about each other,
[01:14] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[01:19] ---
    All of America cried!
[01:20] ---
    We'll make ya laugh 3 times in 5 minutes!
[01:22] ---
    Already, no hope for the Academy Award!
[01:25] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:28] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:31] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:36] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[01:41] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[01:47] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[01:52] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naive and honest!
[01:58] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[02:03] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[02:08] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[02:14] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[02:20] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[02:22] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[02:25] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[02:31] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[02:33] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[02:36] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[02:55] ---
    Like a Dog, a Mouse, and a Bulldog
[02:58] ---
    What's with this painting?
[03:00] ---
    What do you think?
    Is it not a fabulous portrait?
[03:03] ---
    It's apparently a gift of sorts, but...
[03:06] ---
    Just how much do you
    think this is valued at?
[03:09] ---
    And so... Open the price!
[03:11] ---
    Ones, tens, hundreds, thousands,
    ten thousands, hundred thousands,
[03:15] ---
    millions, ten millions...
[03:17] ---
    Two hundred million yen!
[03:19] ---
    It's cheaper than I thought.
[03:21] ---
    I have brought the milk tea.
[03:23] ---
    Thank you for your hard work.
[03:24] ---
    Though, well, in 10 years,
    my autographed illustrations
[03:27] ---
    will probably be worth 100 times
    more than this thing.
[03:29] ---
    Good grief.
[03:31] ---
    It seems you still do not understand...
[03:34] ---
    ...what true quality is!
[03:36] ---
    What did you say?!
[03:37] ---
    Oh?
[03:38] ---
    What's wrong, Hayate?
[03:39] ---
    This is a fake.
[03:41] ---
    What?
[03:42] ---
    Wh-What are you saying?!
[03:44] ---
    You should know that this august painting
    is worth even more
[03:47] ---
    than your debt, which you'll spend
    the rest of your life repaying!
[03:49] ---
    Please excuse me.
[03:57] ---
    What do you think, sir?
[03:59] ---
    It is a fake.
[04:00] ---
    What?!
[04:02] ---
    We actually received word just earlier
    that this painting appears to be a fake.
[04:06] ---
    There we go.
[04:08] ---
    Well, please excuse us.
SIGN    CRUSHED
[04:12] ---
    Hey, where are you going?
[04:14] ---
    Eep!
[04:15] ---
    W-Well, it's been a while,
[04:17] ---
    so I thought I'd go be a Giant
    of Art in the storehouse or something...
[04:19] ---
    See you!
[04:21] ---
    B-But anyway, you have
    a brilliantly discerning eye, Hayate.
[04:25] ---
    How did you know that painting was fake?
[04:28] ---
    Well, that's... uh...
[04:31] ---
    This is from back when I was little,
[04:34] ---
    but well, I used to help with my
    father's business and sell art.
[04:38] ---
    Oh, so your father was an art dealer?
[04:41] ---
    Oh, no, that's not it.
[04:42] ---
    Ah! Truly, you have a sharp eye!
[04:45] ---
    You see, we would first
    show them the real painting
[04:48] ---
    and when the customer had made a purchase,
[04:50] ---
    he would hand it over to me right
    in front of the customer
[04:52] ---
    to avoid suspicion.
[04:53] ---
    The boy will package it up for you then,
[04:55] ---
    so please wait one moment.
[04:57] ---
    We were dealing with valuables,
    so the customers are also wary, but...
[05:02] ---
    They seemed to lower their guard,
    knowing I was a child,
[05:04] ---
    so I would make it look like
    I was packaging up the real thing,
[05:06] ---
    but I would switch it with a fake
    that was hidden behind the real one
[05:08] ---
    and sell the customer that one.
[05:11] ---
    That's a crime, no two ways about it!
[05:13] ---
    I was little, so I didn't
    know it was a crime.
[05:16] ---
    And that was when my father drummed into me
[05:18] ---
    how to instantly recognize fakes
    for all kinds of paintings.
[05:22] ---
    How much worthless information
    did you have drummed into you?
[05:28] ---
    Hayate Ayasaki, protagonist of this manga
    and occasionally its heroine.
[05:31] ---
    He's not out to destroy the Andro Army,
[05:33] ---
    but he possesses an invulnerable body.
[05:35] ---
    The author loved the World
    Masterpiece Theater too much
[05:37] ---
    and before he realized it, he had
    created an utterly unfortunate boy.
[05:41] ---
    Um...
[05:43] ---
    What have you been reading from, Nagi?
[05:46] ---
    Um, excuse me...
[05:47] ---
    Well, something's been bothering me,
[05:50] ---
    so I'm reading the original manga
    from the beginning.
[05:52] ---
    Something that's bothering you?
[05:53] ---
    Never mind that. I wish you
    wouldn't rob me of my job...
[05:57] ---
    You think Hayate's abilities
    are amazing, too, right?
[06:00] ---
    Yes, of course.
[06:02] ---
    Too amazing.
[06:04] ---
    He's deft, but he also
    has great physical strength
[06:07] ---
    and he accomplishes all
    tasks perfectly and swiftly.
[06:13] ---
    Now, on to the next room.
[06:19] ---
    On top of which, he's got
    incomprehensible special powers,
[06:22] ---
    making him too good to be
    the protagonist of a romantic comedy.
[06:25] ---
    Well, we do occasionally get
    the shoehorned battles, so...
[06:29] ---
    So, here's a question I've got.
[06:31] ---
    Doesn't he have any weaknesses or anything?
[06:34] ---
    Huh?
[06:34] ---
    Weaknesses! You know, weaknesses!
[06:36] ---
    Doraemon has mice, Oba-Q has dogs,
    and Goku has his tail.
[06:40] ---
    For the heroes of manga and anime,
[06:42] ---
    they tend to come with
    weaknesses by default, you know?
[06:44] ---
    I see... Is that how it works?
[06:47] ---
    I don't know. Hayate's amazing,
[06:49] ---
    but he's got a bit of this aura
    that makes you want to be mean to him.
[06:53] ---
    Please, stop this.
[06:56] ---
    Well, I won't deny it...
[06:58] ---
    Right?
[06:59] ---
    As someone who shares Robocon's
    weakness, you agree, right?
[07:04] ---
    What does that have
    anything to do with this?!
[07:06] ---
    Or actually...
[07:07] ---
    Oh, really! I wish you wouldn't
    remind me of such unpleasantness!
[07:11] ---
    So, I think Hayate needs a weakness!
[07:14] ---
    Come on! Hinomaru Box!
SIGN    Ru Ma No Hi
[07:20] ---
    I've prepared items that could
    possibly be weaknesses for Hayate
[07:22] ---
    in the form of "Hinomaru" boxes.
[07:25] ---
    Uh, then I'll take the "ma" from "Hinomaru".
[07:26] ---
    Good. Open the box!
[07:32] ---
    Um, Nagi?
[07:34] ---
    Keep that creepy thing away from me!
[07:36] ---
    Then you shouldn't have
    prepared it in the first place.
[07:38] ---
    Darn it!
[07:39] ---
    I guess it really was stupid of us
    to rely on Saito the announcer!
[07:42] ---
    Uh, "us"? It's not like I really...
[07:44] ---
    In the end, we'll just have to discover
    his weaknesses through observation.
[07:47] ---
    I see...
[07:49] ---
    All right, that's correct, too.
[07:53] ---
    I've finally overcome my math weakness.
[07:56] ---
    Darn! Look at that!
[07:57] ---
    One of Hayate's rare
    weaknesses has been overcome!
[08:01] ---
    Um, I don't think that's
    necessarily a bad thing.
[08:05] ---
    Does he have any other weaknesses
    or things he doesn't like?
[08:07] ---
    Time to observe carefully!
[08:08] ---
    Oh, but look at him.
[08:11] ---
    The Miss won't eat sardines like this,
[08:15] ---
    so I'll mince it up a bit and get rid
    of the fishiness with ginger.
[08:19] ---
    And she doesn't like carrots
    or green peppers, either.
[08:21] ---
    Plus, she absolutely won't eat spicy things.
[08:23] ---
    Oh, and she doesn't like
    chicken skin, either.
[08:26] ---
    It seems he's observed you carefully
    on your weaknesses and dislikes.
[08:30] ---
    Honestly, it's because she's
    so picky that her growth is...
[08:34] ---
    I swear! Hayate, you're really... I swear!
[08:39] ---
    Since it's come to this,
[08:40] ---
    we have no choice but to go after him
    with standard weaknesses.
[08:42] ---
    Pardon?
[08:43] ---
    Ta-da!
[08:46] ---
    What do you think? This'll scare him, right?
[08:49] ---
    Yes, it's just scary in all sorts of ways...
[08:52] ---
    Everyone gets scared when a ghost shows up.
[08:54] ---
    This is the perfect plan.
[08:56] ---
    But isn't that more like your own weakness?
[08:59] ---
    All right! Now, I just have to wait
    until night to catch Hayate sleeping...
[09:03] ---
    I do not see the need to wait until night.
[09:06] ---
    Look, if you just darken
    the room like this...
[09:12] ---
    N-N-Nah, Maria, i-isn't it still too early?
[09:16] ---
    Do you think so?
[09:18] ---
    But you'll have to go to these lengths,
[09:21] ---
    or he won't be scared.
[09:25] ---
    You don't have to be that scared...
[09:28] ---
    Ya got a long way to go!
[09:30] ---
    That voice!
[09:33] ---
    Fermented soybeans, red miso soup,
    savory monja pancakes!
[09:35] ---
    If it's weaknesses,
    I'll give ya a run for yer money!
[09:38] ---
    Sakuya...
[09:38] ---
    Where did you pop out from?!
[09:41] ---
    The butler-in-debt's weakness, huh?
[09:43] ---
    All right, leave it to me!
[09:47] ---
    Guys like him sometimes have
    the most unexpected weaknesses!
[09:50] ---
    Unexpected?
[09:54] ---
    Terrifyin' invaders who forced humanity
    to the brink of extinction...
[10:01] ---
    But their sinister plot's
    destroyed by microorganisms!
[10:06] ---
    Isn't that the weakness of aliens?
[10:09] ---
    As I thought, I cannot leave this to Saku.
[10:11] ---
    If only I could come up with a good idea...
[10:14] ---
    I have a good idea.
[10:17] ---
    Isumi!
[10:17] ---
    What's this good idea?
[10:20] ---
    My idea is...
[10:23] ---
    We can simply ask him directly.
[10:27] ---
    I hadn't thought of that!
[10:30] ---
    Huh?
[10:31] ---
    So, what is it that you
    are afraid of, my dear Hayate?
[10:36] ---
    What?
[10:37] ---
    Um...
[10:40] ---
    "This is about where
    I'd be afraid of a cup of tea."
[10:43] ---
    For those of you who don't get it,
[10:45] ---
    please listen to the traditional rakugo
    story called "Scared of Manju Sweets".
[10:49] ---
    What's this, an Edo Era punchline?!
[10:53] ---
    I'm scared of Dom Pérignon!
    I'm scared of Dom Pérignon!
[10:57] ---
    I got the feeling something just went by...
[10:59] ---
    That was just your imagination.
[11:00] ---
    Come to think of it,
    what's yer weakness, Isumi?
[11:03] ---
    What?
[11:04] ---
    Just wonderin' if even the supreme
    Ghost Sweeper's afraid of somethin'.
[11:09] ---
    Something I am afraid of?
[11:11] ---
    I do have something.
[11:13] ---
    Ooh! What's that?
[11:14] ---
    I am afraid of caterpillars.
[11:17] ---
    Caterpillars?
[11:19] ---
    What the heck? That's an awfully
    normal thing to be afraid of.
[11:22] ---
    With a body length of 180 meters
    and weighing 20,000 tons,
[11:26] ---
    it is the guardian deity of Infant Island.
[11:28] ---
    It spun a giant cocoon on Tokyo Tower...
[11:30] ---
    Even an atomic heat ray
    attack had no effect on it
[11:34] ---
    and once it became an imago,
[11:35] ---
    it is said to have devastated
    a certain country...
[11:38] ---
    No, no, no, no!
[11:39] ---
    I mean, that's no caterpillar!
[11:42] ---
    Lame...
[11:43] ---
    ...brain...
[11:44] ---
    Lame...
[11:45] ---
    ...brain...
[11:45] ---
    If that'll be all...
[11:46] ---
    Lame...
[11:51] ---
    I won't let you sleep.
    (Nekasanai yo.)
[11:55] ---
    With pleasure.
    (Yorokonde.)
[11:58] ---
    I'm stuffed!
[12:00] ---
    Thanks for the food!
[12:01] ---
    I appreciate you treating us
    to lunch as well.
[12:05] ---
    You are quite welcome.
[12:09] ---
    She certainly left them neatly uneaten.
[12:14] ---
    You probably thought you
    took advantage of my weakness,
[12:17] ---
    but it won't be so easy!
[12:18] ---
    Just you watch, Hayate!
[12:20] ---
    Next, I'll be sure to uncover your weakness!
[12:24] ---
    So you still haven't given up?
[12:26] ---
    Maria.
[12:28] ---
    Once everything's cleaned up,
    would it be all right if I took a break?
[12:31] ---
    Certainly, I won't mind.
[12:34] ---
    What are you going to do, Hayate?
[12:35] ---
    Oh, nothing much. I just thought
    I'd get back to my studies.
[12:39] ---
    Since the finals are coming up.
[12:41] ---
    The finals?
[12:43] ---
    I must work hard to advance
    to the next grade with you, after all.
[12:48] ---
    W-With me...
[12:50] ---
    Th-That's true.
[12:52] ---
    You two better not interfere
    with Hayate's studies, got it?!
[12:56] ---
    By no means are you to get any silly ideas,
[12:58] ---
    such as being hell-bent
    on discovering his weakness!
[13:01] ---
    Ya know...
[13:02] ---
    I shall be careful, Nagi.
[13:04] ---
    Oh, yes, I have the math
    problems from last year.
[13:08] ---
    Would you like to look
    at them for reference?
[13:10] ---
    Yes, I would love to!
[13:13] ---
    Um, this is math, and yet,
    the problems aren't in Japanese...
[13:18] ---
    Yeah, it's in German.
[13:20] ---
    What?! German?!
[13:21] ---
    But Germany is the land of sausages!
[13:24] ---
    Well, they've got other
    things like beer, too, though.
[13:26] ---
    Never mind that! This is way
    beyond the level of "hard"!
[13:33] ---
    H-Hello there, Wataru. Welcome.
[13:35] ---
    We're getting a great
    number of guests today.
[13:38] ---
    So what are you suddenly
    storming in here for?
[13:41] ---
    What am I here for?
    I mean, what's up with this exam?!
[13:44] ---
    Well, Hakuou is
    a prestigious school, after all,
[13:46] ---
    so it's only natural that it's hard.
[13:48] ---
    There's hard and then there's this!
[13:50] ---
    That's right! There's
    no way we can read this.
[13:52] ---
    What?
[13:54] ---
    You guys can't read that?
[13:56] ---
    What?
SIGN    Isumi Saginomiya: 4 Languages
SIGN    Maria: 13 Languages
SIGN    Nagi Sanzenin: 8 Languages
SIGN    Wataru Tachibana: 2 Languages
[14:04] ---
    Wait, you skipped grades
    and you can't even read German?
[14:08] ---
    I've got my hands full with just English!
[14:10] ---
    But you could choose to have problems
    in English as well on the exam.
[14:14] ---
    Um, even English is kind of iffy for me...
SIGN    Hayate Ayasaki: 1.5 Languages
[14:19] ---
    J-Just for my own reference,
[14:20] ---
    what will happen
    if I should fail or something?
[14:24] ---
    Please don't fall silent.
[14:27] ---
    What should I do?
[14:29] ---
    Goin' to a prestigious
    school sure sounds tough.
[14:32] ---
    I'm so glad I'm goin' to a normal school.
[14:36] ---
    Saku...
[14:37] ---
    Now, then, guess playtime's over.
[14:39] ---
    Ya guys study hard.
[14:42] ---
    C'mon, Isumi, let's go.
[14:43] ---
    What? Me, too?
[14:45] ---
    Yeah, 'cause Wataru won't be able to
    focus on his studies with ya around.
[14:50] ---
    What? Why would Wataru have problems...?
[14:52] ---
    S-Saku, you bastard!
[14:54] ---
    Oh! N-Nothing...
[14:56] ---
    Well, Nagi, we'll leave the rest to ya.
[15:01] ---
    C'mon, let's go, Isumi.
[15:02] ---
    All right.
[15:04] ---
    Sheesh.
[15:05] ---
    Well, no helping it then.
[15:10] ---
    In the meantime,
    over at a normal high school...
[15:15] ---
    Huh? What's with this quiz score?
SIGN    Ayumu Nishizawa
[15:19] ---
    This might be kind of bad...
[15:22] ---
    Even with talk of love and romance,
[15:24] ---
    the realities of high school life are harsh.
[15:28] ---
    I have to study!
SIGN    Newest Edition Understandable German
[15:32] ---
    That should do it.
[15:33] ---
    What are you doing, Miss?
[15:37] ---
    Oh, because there's a limit to how much
    you can study on your own.
[15:40] ---
    I figured I'd go look after my
    less accomplished little brother.
[15:43] ---
    I see.
[15:45] ---
    I guess there really
    are limits on your own...
[15:47] ---
    Um, I also...
[15:48] ---
    Because, you see,
[15:50] ---
    unlike you, he's not the sort
    who can do it just by working at it.
[15:53] ---
    Huh?
[15:54] ---
    Uh, um... Miss?
[15:57] ---
    Well, I'm going to go
    tutor Wataru over there.
[16:03] ---
    I will not tolerate a Sanzenin
    butler getting a failing grade.
[16:09] ---
    Yes, Miss.
[16:10] ---
    So, what are you going to do now, Hayate?
[16:13] ---
    Um...
[16:17] ---
    Please tutor me, Maria!
[16:19] ---
    I thought you might say that.
[16:22] ---
    Thank you very much!
[16:24] ---
    I swear! You better be
    at least a little grateful.
[16:27] ---
    I am. Sheesh.
[16:29] ---
    I'd feel bad for Saku
    if you flunked or something,
[16:32] ---
    so work hard.
[16:36] ---
    R-Right.
[16:37] ---
    But I had no idea that both Wataru
    and Isumi had skipped grades.
[16:41] ---
    Come to think of it,
    I guess we never mentioned it.
[16:44] ---
    Without friends, Nagi would probably
    completely stop going to school,
[16:49] ---
    so we had them skip grades with her.
[16:51] ---
    Their grades were good, too, so...
[16:54] ---
    Mind you, it was originally supposed to be
    Isumi and Sakuya who went with her.
[16:59] ---
    What?
[17:00] ---
    The truth is, with Wataru, skipping
    grades was a pretty big stretch.
[17:05] ---
    But there was a reason Wataru
    desperately wanted to go to Hakuou
[17:10] ---
    and only 3 slots available
    for skipping grades, so...
SIGN    Mr. Wataru Tachibana
SIGN     Enrollment Paperwork
    Hakuou Academy Entrance Exam Center
[17:42] ---
    Nagi tutored him at that time, too.
[17:46] ---
    I see.
[17:49] ---
    I guess they're close.
[17:52] ---
    Yes.
[17:54] ---
    So, if the Small Beauties
    of Infant Island become lost,
[17:57] ---
    the entire world will surely fall
    into a panic once again...
[18:00] ---
    Nah, enough 'bout that already.
[18:02] ---
    By the way, how's school these days?
[18:05] ---
    Is it still fun?
[18:07] ---
    Yes, but Nagi does not come
    to school much, so...
[18:11] ---
    Then, Wataru's 'bout
    the only playmate you got?
[18:14] ---
    That is not entirely true, but...
[18:17] ---
    I only say hello to Wataru
    every one in a while anyway.
[18:21] ---
    Good grief.
[18:23] ---
    And here I thought maybe they
    were slowly gettin' somewhere.
[18:26] ---
    Huh? What are you talking about?
[18:28] ---
    Nothin'.
[18:30] ---
    So, what happened to King Ghidorah?
[18:32] ---
    What? Um, King Ghidorah was...
[18:35] ---
    But it is a little worrisome, isn't it?
[18:38] ---
    Pardon?
[18:39] ---
    I mean the Miss and Wataru.
[18:41] ---
    They may still be children,
[18:42] ---
    but for a young man and a young
    woman to be alone is...
[18:45] ---
    Oh, please, Hayate.
[18:47] ---
    Perhaps we should figure out a nice timing
[18:49] ---
    to bring them coffee or something.
[18:51] ---
    You're thinking too much about this.
[18:53] ---
    I mean, if we start talking
    about a young man
[18:55] ---
    and a young woman being alone,
[18:56] ---
    we are also...
[18:58] ---
    What?
[18:59] ---
    What?
[19:03] ---
    The cliché romantic comedy mode!
[19:06] ---
    Should we bring them coffee, after all?
    Finding a nice timing for it...
[19:09] ---
    P-Perhaps we should...
[19:11] ---
    But I feel bad that you're
    always tutoring me...
[19:15] ---
    Huh?
[19:17] ---
    What's with this creepy gracious attitude?
[19:20] ---
    Y-You idiot! I'm always gracious!
[19:25] ---
    You'd be more endearing
    if you were always this gracious.
[19:28] ---
    You... Stop that!
[19:29] ---
    Miss!
[19:31] ---
    We have brought you coffee!
[19:33] ---
    Wait...
[19:35] ---
    Nice timing!
[19:37] ---
    Wh-Why are you holding hands
    while you're studying?
[19:45] ---
    You've got this wrong, Hayate!
[19:47] ---
    Th-This just sort of happened...
[19:49] ---
    It just sort of happened...
    and you were trying to do what?
[19:52] ---
    I wasn't trying to do anything!
[19:53] ---
    That's right, Hayate!
    This is a misunderstanding!
[19:55] ---
    That's right! I wouldn't even want
    to do anything to Nagi!
[19:58] ---
    What?!
[19:59] ---
    I mean...
[20:00] ---
    I love Isumi!
[20:03] ---
    What?
[20:14] ---
    Uh, um...
[20:16] ---
    I got lost while I was
    chasing after Sakuya and...
[20:19] ---
    Y-You got it all wrong, Isumi!
[20:20] ---
    Th-Th-This is... You see...
[20:23] ---
    J-Just kidding. I was trying to go
    for a joke or something.
[20:26] ---
    Oh, my, so it was a joke.
[20:29] ---
    Don't ya have any desire
    to make progress here?! Ya wuss!
[20:34] ---
    At this rate, going to the same
    school has been meaningless.
[20:38] ---
    But you see now, don't you?
[20:40] ---
    You don't have to worry about us.
[20:43] ---
    S-So it seems.
[20:45] ---
    Now I can rest easy and go study with Maria.
[20:48] ---
    Yes. You can rest easy and...
[20:52] ---
    Hold on a second. What did
    you say you're going to do?
[20:55] ---
    Oh, as I said, go study with Maria...
[20:59] ---
    Go study with Maria, just the two of you?!
[21:02] ---
    How dare you do such a thing
    behind my back?!
[21:05] ---
    Why you! This is unforgivable!
[21:06] ---
    M-Miss?!
[21:07] ---
    Miss, what are you so angry about?!
[21:10] ---
    I don't want to hear your excuses!
[21:12] ---
    In the end, it seems not
    understanding a girl's feelings
[21:16] ---
    is Hayate's greatest weakness.
[21:19] ---
    Now, then, next time, even
    Hollywood films will be shocked!
[21:23] ---
    They'll fight against a luxury
    passenger liner, terrorists,
[21:25] ---
    and man-eating sharks.
[21:26] ---
    Lame...
[21:27] ---
    ...brain...
[21:29] ---
    You have to "go Isumi" on jokes.
[21:31] ---
    Wait, that should've been
    "go easy"! Just kidding!
[21:37] ---
    You really love telling jokes,
    don't you, Wataru?
[21:39] ---
    Nah...
[21:41] ---
    Even though they are not very funny.
[21:43] ---
    But as a creature, I think
    he might be kind of funny.
[21:48] ---
    Looks like I'll hafta give him some lessons.
[21:57] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:06] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:10] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:16] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:25] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:42] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:47] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:52] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:56] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
SIGN    The Katsura Sisters'
SIGN     Lettering by Hitomi Nabatame
[23:26] ---
    The Katsura sisters'...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:29] ---
    Boom! It's Yukiji Katsura!
[23:32] ---
    B-Boom! I am Hinagiku Katsura.
[23:34] ---
    We are the much talked-about pair
    of pretty girls, the Katsura sisters!
[23:38] ---
    Ta-da!
[23:39] ---
    Hey, are you sure about this, Sis?
[23:41] ---
    I'm going along with this because you say
[23:42] ---
    this is your moment in the spotlight,
[23:43] ---
    but this is really embarrassing, okay?
[23:45] ---
    Hina, your enthusiasm is lacking.
[23:47] ---
    And we practiced this so many
    times yesterday, too.
[23:48] ---
    If this song sells, I can say goodbye
    to my hard life of poverty!
[23:51] ---
    I'll get to drink all
    the Dom Pérignon I want!
[23:53] ---
    Well, then, see you again next time!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    I see! So that's what it was!
[23:57] ---
    The reason I haven't won Hayate over...
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:59] ---
    The most important thing
    when it comes to romance...
[24:00] ---
    ...is giving the cold shoulder!
[24:02] ---
    But I want a situation where Hayate
    will rely on me more somehow...
[24:05] ---
    Nagi, you've been invited on
    an ocean voyage on Sakuya's yacht.
[24:08] ---
    Yes, that's it!
[24:10] ---
    Next time, "The Poseidon
    Advance Generator Gavas"!
[24:12] ---
    But this ship's pretty well-built.
[24:15] ---
    Ya think so? That's nice.
[24:16] ---
    You can give me the cold shoulder
    all you want! I'm not falling for you!
[24:18] ---
    The Poseidon Advance Generator Gavas
[24:20] ---
    Just In to "Hayate the Combat
    Butler" again next time!

43 - The Poseidon Advance Generator Gavas

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:33] ---
    Wh-Wh-Whoa!
[00:38] ---
    It's smaller than I expected.
[00:40] ---
    What?! Th-This is?!
[00:41] ---
    This is.
[00:42] ---
    This right here.
[00:44] ---
    Then, how big would it have to be
    for you to call it "huge"?!
[00:48] ---
    Or wait... um... is this...
[00:51] ---
    Is this really Sakuya's?!
[00:56] ---
    Her warped sense of humor
    really shows, doesn't it?
[00:58] ---
    I see...
[01:00] ---
    You did say the yacht is of
    a familiar shape and size, but...
[01:04] ---
    This really is incredible.
[01:07] ---
    Hayate, are you...
[01:08] ---
    How is this a yacht?! No matter how
    you look at it, it's the Titanic!
[01:12] ---
    Is that what you're thinking?
[01:14] ---
    Uh-huh, uh-huh.
[01:16] ---
    Miss Sakuya is waiting for you.
[01:18] ---
    Right. Hayate.
[01:20] ---
    Klaus.
[01:20] ---
    Yes, Miss.
[01:25] ---
    Let's go, Maria. Klaus.
[01:26] ---
    Yes, Miss.
[01:27] ---
    W-Won't you please wait
    a moment for me, Miss?!
[01:30] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[01:32] ---
    That a humongous mansion like this
    exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[01:37] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[01:41] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[01:44] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[01:46] ---
    and both have a bit of the wrong
    idea about each other,
[01:48] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[01:54] ---
    A passionate woman's bright red cruiser!
[01:56] ---
    "Let's go cruiser."
    The white bullet, is it not?
[01:59] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:02] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:05] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:10] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[02:15] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[02:21] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[02:26] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naive and honest!
[02:32] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[02:37] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[02:42] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[02:48] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[02:54] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[02:56] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[02:59] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[03:04] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[03:07] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[03:10] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[03:28] ---
    The Poseidon Advance Generator Gavas
[03:35] ---
    Say, Hayate.
[03:36] ---
    Yes?
[03:37] ---
    Would you ask me, "Why are we
    suddenly going on an ocean voyage?"
[03:41] ---
    What?
[03:41] ---
    Ask her. It's to get the story rolling.
[03:45] ---
    Miss, why are we suddenly
    going on an ocean voyage?
[03:47] ---
    What?!
[03:49] ---
    You see, the truth is... well...
[03:51] ---
    You don't have to answer
    if you don't want to...
[03:53] ---
    That's because...
[03:54] ---
    She totally wants to answer.
[03:56] ---
    "Hey, Britney, would you
    please not get too attached?"
[03:59] ---
    "CRUSHED!"
[04:00] ---
    "No... What a cold thing
    for my senpai to say to me!"
[04:04] ---
    "But that cold shoulder..."
[04:09] ---
    "It makes my heart race somehow!"
[04:17] ---
    I see!
[04:18] ---
    The reason I haven't won Hayate over...
[04:20] ---
    The important thing
    when it comes to romance...
[04:23] ---
    ...is giving the cold shoulder!
[04:25] ---
    So she's gone with that angle...
[04:28] ---
    It's true, when it comes to romance,
    rather than being the pursuer...
[04:37] ---
    The one being pursued is the winner!
[04:40] ---
    Even that manga author Honou once said it...
[04:43] ---
    That your own manga can
    sometimes teach you things!
[04:48] ---
    In that case...
[04:50] ---
    Just you watch, Hayate!
[04:52] ---
    With my cold shoulder,
    I'll make you fall head over heels!
[04:58] ---
    Oh, Miss.
[05:00] ---
    Ah, Hayate, morn...
[05:02] ---
    No, no! What are you doing
    getting so excited?!
[05:04] ---
    Don't act like that. I have to
    face him with an icier attitude.
[05:10] ---
    A-Ah. Morning.
[05:14] ---
    Um, Miss?
[05:16] ---
    Huh?! Wh-What?!
[05:17] ---
    Oh, no, it's just that your shoelace
    is a bit undone, so...
[05:22] ---
    Please excuse me. If you
    would let me see your foot...
[05:31] ---
    You should be fine now, Miss.
[05:34] ---
    R-Right.
[05:35] ---
    Do not get flustered! This
    is where you deliver a decisive blow!
[05:38] ---
    Right.
[05:41] ---
    Good work. You may go now.
[05:44] ---
    Huh?
[05:47] ---
    I swear, that Hayate. He's a formidable one.
[05:50] ---
    Miss, please don't leave me behind!
[05:52] ---
    I need a place that's more unfamiliar
    to Hayate somehow...
[05:55] ---
    Hayate's so cute.
[05:55] ---
    And find a situation where
    Hayate will need to rely on me...
[05:58] ---
    Nagi, a phone call for you from Sakuya.
[06:00] ---
    I hardly have time for this right now,
    but what does she want?
[06:03] ---
    She is inviting you on
    an ocean voyage on her yacht.
[06:08] ---
    That's it!
[06:10] ---
    This is where the flashback ends.
[06:12] ---
    I can't tell Hayate this...
[06:15] ---
    Let's hurry! Saku's waiting!
[06:17] ---
    Um, what about answering that question?
[06:19] ---
    Oh, well.
[06:25] ---
    At any rate, Sakuya's...
[06:27] ---
    Sakuya's "yacht",
    as she calls it, put out to sea.
[06:29] ---
    Oh, I really hate these
    rich folks. Just hate them.
[06:32] ---
    This is incredible.
    All these people seeing us off...
[06:37] ---
    Maybe they're hired extras.
[06:38] ---
    Precisely.
[06:40] ---
    What's that about, Saku?
[06:42] ---
    Why that's 'cause the more
    rowdy scene suits me.
[06:45] ---
    This is absurd.
[06:47] ---
    I'll wave to them, too.
[06:48] ---
    Don't.
[06:48] ---
    Hey!
[06:49] ---
    The passengers are extras, too.
[06:51] ---
    The mood's everythin' with these things.
[06:54] ---
    You have a band, too?
[06:55] ---
    Yup.
[07:01] ---
    The people dancin' are extras, too.
[07:03] ---
    How many non-extras are there?
[07:09] ---
    Miss, I've been looking for you.
[07:11] ---
    Saku, do you have a female dancer
    capable of dancing forcefully?
[07:15] ---
    I do, but what're ya plottin'?
[07:18] ---
    This ship is incredibly huge.
    I almost got lost...
[07:21] ---
    Would you dance with me?
[07:23] ---
    You want to... dance... right?
[07:25] ---
    That's right. I won't let you
    turn down a lady's request.
[07:33] ---
    Miss!
[07:35] ---
    What should I do?!
[07:41] ---
    I guess ocean voyages
    are demanding, aren't they, Miss?
[07:47] ---
    Why?!
[07:47] ---
    Saku... so on and so forth...
[07:50] ---
    Okay, I'll give it a try.
[07:52] ---
    Activate Trap C-5!
[07:56] ---
    Miss!
[07:59] ---
    What're ya up to?
[08:01] ---
    Make this ship rock!
[08:03] ---
    I don't really get it, but leave it to me!
[08:08] ---
    Miss, where are...
[08:09] ---
    Oh, Miss!
[08:14] ---
    Right!
[08:16] ---
    Left!
[08:18] ---
    And back to the right!
[08:23] ---
    But why the heck do I hafta do this?
[08:27] ---
    "Hayate the... Combat
    Butler"... is a good anime!
[08:31] ---
    Miss!
[08:38] ---
    Miss!
[08:41] ---
    I won't help him! I won't help him!
[08:43] ---
    I won't help him, no matter what!
[08:46] ---
    Miss, this is my first time aboard a yacht,
[08:49] ---
    but I guess it rocks
    a lot more than I expected.
[08:51] ---
    As I had anticipated,
[08:52] ---
    he's totally keyed up being
    aboard a yacht for the first time.
[08:56] ---
    But this is according to plan!
[08:57] ---
    And now...
[08:59] ---
    Ah! That felt good!
[09:01] ---
    What else might there be, Miss?
[09:04] ---
    This is it!
[09:05] ---
    Miss...
[09:06] ---
    Don't ask me about every little thing!
[09:15] ---
    How about it?!
[09:16] ---
    Did that do it? Did that get
    through? Did that get to you?
[09:18] ---
    Did it hit you hard right in the chest?!
[09:21] ---
    P-Please pardon me.
[09:23] ---
    Y-You idiot!
[09:25] ---
    D-Don't look like some abandoned puppy!
[09:30] ---
    A-At any rate, I'm going to
    have some tea over there!
[09:34] ---
    I-If you want to look around
    the ship, do it on your own!
[09:38] ---
    Oh, Miss!
[09:41] ---
    What is the matter, Hayate?
[09:42] ---
    Um, did I do something
    to offend the Miss again?
[09:46] ---
    Who knows? I wouldn't know about that...
[09:49] ---
    Yesterday, it seems
    she was drawing her manga,
[09:51] ---
    groaning and agonizing over it as usual...
[09:53] ---
    Perhaps something happened
    that was not to her satisfaction.
[09:57] ---
    Something that was not to her satisfaction?
[09:58] ---
    Speaking of which, all Hayate had
    for breakfast was fermented soybeans.
[10:03] ---
    But you know, Saku,
    this is a pretty well-crafted ship.
[10:08] ---
    Ya think so?
[10:09] ---
    Well, that's nice.
[10:13] ---
    You can give me the cold shoulder
    all you want! I'm not falling for you!
[10:18] ---
    What're ya talkin' about?!
[10:19] ---
    I'm not talking about anything.
[10:21] ---
    Sheesh, yer not makin' any sense.
[10:23] ---
    By the way, I heard
    that you invited Isumi, too, but...
[10:27] ---
    No doubt she's gotten herself lost.
    This ship's huge, after all.
[10:30] ---
    Where am I?
[10:31] ---
    Oh, dear, oh, dear.
[10:31] ---
    Just as she had surmised.
[10:33] ---
    But is this ship all right?
[10:35] ---
    Meanin'?
[10:36] ---
    I mean, with this design
    that seems like it's destined to sink...
[10:39] ---
    What're ya, a moron?!
[10:41] ---
    Ya listen to me! The "Ti"
    of the "Titanic" stands for...
[10:43] ---
    The "Ti" stands for...?
[10:44] ---
    The "Ti (tai)" in fishin' for shrimp
    with red snapper (tai)!
[10:46] ---
    That's the other way around.
[10:47] ---
    This ship is so sinking.
[10:49] ---
    This ship cost more than the Titanic movie!
[10:53] ---
    No way it's gonna sink, unless
    it gets taken over by terrorists or...
[10:57] ---
    Was that a gunshot?
[10:59] ---
    Yup, yup.
[11:00] ---
    To all you crew members!
[11:02] ---
    We, the terrorist group,
    the Chirp-chirp Corps,
[11:05] ---
    have now taken over this ship!
[11:06] ---
    Therefore, you will quietly do as we say!
[11:11] ---
    So they say. What are you going to do?
[11:13] ---
    There sure are some reckless
    adventurous bastards out there.
[11:17] ---
    Uh, you terrorists there.
[11:19] ---
    What is it, you little girl?!
[11:21] ---
    We have no interest in pipsqueaks like you!
[11:23] ---
    So he says. What're ya gonna do?
[11:27] ---
    Don't lay a hand on the crew
    or the passengers.
[11:29] ---
    The fewer hostages the better, right?
[11:32] ---
    H-Hey, Nagi, yer not thinkin' of...
[11:35] ---
    What's this, little girl?
    Are you volunteering to be a hostage?
[11:39] ---
    Yeah, I think it's her responsibility.
[11:41] ---
    After all, she's the owner of this ship.
[11:44] ---
    Wait, I'm gonna be the hostage?!
[11:46] ---
    Behold this brilliantly sharp wit,
    not even letting that small jab go by!
[11:50] ---
    What're ya doin', calmly recommendin' me?!
[11:53] ---
    For funny men like you, who haven't
    learned a thing from robot anime...
[11:58] ---
    Why you...
[12:02] ---
    But goodness, this ship truly is huge.
[12:06] ---
    It's so huge, I almost
    don't know where I came from.
[12:10] ---
    But I wonder why the Miss
    is in such a foul mood.
[12:15] ---
    And I was lost.
[12:20] ---
    And so, Die Hard at sea continued.
[12:27] ---
    We'll hafta play it by ear!
    (Deta toko soubu ya!)
[12:30] ---
    Please stop that.
    (Yamete.)
[12:40] ---
    I swear. Terrorists these days...
[12:42] ---
    They think they can win
    as long as they have guns.
[12:44] ---
    They leave much to be desired.
[12:46] ---
    Their kung fu was not enough.
[12:48] ---
    Wh-What a tough bunch.
[12:50] ---
    And yet, they have
    a gentlemanly way about them.
[12:53] ---
    Who in the world are you?
[12:55] ---
    You fools!
[12:56] ---
    You snuck onto this ship
    without even knowing who we are?
[13:00] ---
    Now, you listen carefully!
[13:05] ---
    We protect our mistresses.
[13:08] ---
    We are first-rate butlers!
[13:10] ---
    We will do everything in our power
    to eliminate anyone
[13:13] ---
    who attempts to harm our mistresses.
[13:16] ---
    Remember that well.
SIGN    Butlers
[13:19] ---
    Ya can act cool all ya want,
[13:20] ---
    but it won't erase yer blunder
    in lettin' this bunch get on board.
[13:24] ---
    Eep!
[13:25] ---
    So, what were these guys after?
[13:28] ---
    Who knows?
[13:29] ---
    Isumi's here, too,
[13:30] ---
    so I'm sure there're a ton of reasons
    they could've been after us for...
[13:34] ---
    We attacked your ship because
    it looked full of rich people.
[13:37] ---
    To repay my debts!
[13:38] ---
    I don't want my wife and children
    to suffer any more hardship!
[13:42] ---
    So you have a wife and children?
[13:44] ---
    Sorry about that.
[13:45] ---
    You're poor?
[13:46] ---
    Y-Yes, I am.
[13:48] ---
    You got some problem with that?!
[13:50] ---
    Nope.
[13:51] ---
    C'mon now, confessing that easily?
[13:53] ---
    Even on Conan, ya don't see that often.
[13:55] ---
    Explaining your own
    motives in their entirety...
[13:58] ---
    What are you, a criminal
    from a Tuesday Suspense drama?
[14:01] ---
    H-How dare you mock me?!
[14:02] ---
    Since it's come to this, I'll end it all!
[14:11] ---
    Wha?! This is...!
[14:13] ---
    A bomb?!
[14:16] ---
    To put it bluntly...
[14:18] ---
    It's all over!
[14:20] ---
    My debts will disappear
    along with this ship!
[14:26] ---
    And a one, two...
[14:31] ---
    You're not scared?
[14:32] ---
    Actually, I'm scared.
[14:33] ---
    Yeah, right?
[14:35] ---
    What'll we do?!
[14:36] ---
    I wonder if the design was bad, after all.
[14:39] ---
    This is no time for that!
[14:40] ---
    Where are Hayate and Isumi?!
[14:42] ---
    Miss Isumi!
[14:51] ---
    Ow, that hurt...
[14:55] ---
    Ow...
[14:58] ---
    Wh-What was that?
[15:01] ---
    Don't tell me... Did we
    hit a glacier, after all?
[15:04] ---
    Considering the design of this ship,
[15:06] ---
    I feel like it'd sink easily
    if anything happened to it.
[15:08] ---
    You think so, too, huh?
[15:12] ---
    Huh? What?
[15:15] ---
    What?!
[15:19] ---
    What the heck is this?!
[15:21] ---
    Blood?!
[15:21] ---
    There's like a whole lot of it!
[15:24] ---
    No, no, calm down.
[15:26] ---
    This is an anime.
[15:27] ---
    By the next scene,
    it'll be like nothing happened...
[15:30] ---
    That's the scenario! The storyboards
    should show that, too!
[15:32] ---
    Look, even in the original manga!
[15:35] ---
    Looks like you were wrong.
[15:36] ---
    But that was close...
[15:38] ---
    Bleeding like this, if I'd been thrown
    into the cold water...
[15:41] ---
    Generally speaking, the amount of time
    a person can withstand cold water
[15:45] ---
    is said to be one hour in 4-5 degree water
[15:48] ---
    and 20-30 minutes is the limit at 0 degrees.
[15:52] ---
    I might die in that.
[15:53] ---
    You poor thing.
[15:56] ---
    That's...
[15:58] ---
    Bobbing along...
[16:01] ---
    Bob, bob, bobbing along, bobbing along...
[16:05] ---
    Oh...
[16:06] ---
    Um...
[16:08] ---
    What?! Isumi?!
[16:11] ---
    Wh-What are you doing here?
[16:13] ---
    That is because...
[16:14] ---
    I shouldn't need to ask.
    You got lost, right?
[16:17] ---
    So, are you all right?
[16:19] ---
    I am not all right.
[16:23] ---
    No, right?
[16:26] ---
    Please wait one moment!
    I will be right there to save...
[16:30] ---
    Getting in cold water
[16:32] ---
    when my body temperature is down
    from loss of blood means...
[16:35] ---
    Mortal danger!
[16:37] ---
    Isumi and Hayate are nowhere to be found?!
[16:39] ---
    Yes, they are the only two we cannot find
[16:41] ---
    and all the butlers are
    in a huge panic, if you will!
[16:44] ---
    On top of which, it seems
    this ship will sink like that
[16:48] ---
    in less than an hour!
[16:49] ---
    Like that?
[16:51] ---
    Like that.
[16:53] ---
    This is bad.
[16:54] ---
    Even DiCaprio was swallowed
    up by the sea in the end...
[16:57] ---
    Don't say such ominous things!
[16:59] ---
    That's not it! I'm sayin' we need
    to worry more 'bout the butler-in-debt.
[17:02] ---
    More worried about Hayate?
[17:04] ---
    It may not seem it, but the goddess
    of good fortune dotes on Isumi,
[17:07] ---
    so I'm sure she'll be fine, but...
[17:10] ---
    But ya know how he is.
    He's possessed by the god of death.
[17:14] ---
    I just hope he doesn't
    do anythin' reckless...
[17:18] ---
    Miss!
[17:20] ---
    Miss!
[17:22] ---
    Miss!
[17:26] ---
    I'm going to go look for Hayate!
[17:28] ---
    H-Hey!
[17:30] ---
    Um, are you all right, my dear Hayate?
[17:34] ---
    I am all right.
[17:35] ---
    I work out more than DiCaprio, so...
[17:37] ---
    On top of which, this water
    was painfully cold at first,
[17:41] ---
    but it's sort of gradually warmed up...
[17:43] ---
    That probably means that your
    condition is getting dicey...
SIGN    DeKaprio
[17:51] ---
    Well, my body's pretty tough,
    so it'll work out somehow.
[17:55] ---
    But you are also bleeding a lot
[17:58] ---
    and lured in by that blood...
[18:01] ---
    ...you seem to have attracted
    some rather large fish...
[18:05] ---
    Surely not...
[18:12] ---
    Hayate!
[18:13] ---
    Hayate!
[18:15] ---
    Hayate!
[18:17] ---
    Take that! Take that!
[18:20] ---
    Take that! Take that!
[18:23] ---
    Take that! Take that!
[18:27] ---
    Take that! Take that! Take that!
[18:27] ---
    What am I seeing here?
[18:29] ---
    A-Are you all right...
[18:31] ---
    No, I can sort of tell
    that you're not, but...
[18:33] ---
    H-How are you feeling, Hayate?!
[18:35] ---
    W-Well, let me think.
[18:36] ---
    I'm probably... in a pinch.
[18:41] ---
    A pinch?! Are you in a big pinch, Hayate?!
[18:45] ---
    Wh-What should I do?
[18:47] ---
    I guess this fish is the kind
    of fish that eats people.
[18:50] ---
    I want to save my dear Hayate,
    but with him in its mouth...
[18:54] ---
    If only I can use this branch somehow to...
[18:56] ---
    Take that! Take that! Take that!
[18:59] ---
    Th-This is an incredibly
    desperate situation somehow...
[19:02] ---
    On top of which, I feel like there
    were two sharks out there...
[19:05] ---
    If the other one attacks,
    then it'll really be...
[19:07] ---
    ...over.
[19:10] ---
    What?!
[19:13] ---
    W-Wait for me, Hayate!
[19:15] ---
    I-I'm coming... right away...
[19:18] ---
    ...to save you!
[19:21] ---
    You mustn't, Miss! There's one more shark...
[19:30] ---
    You leave me no choice!
[19:31] ---
    My...!
[19:32] ---
    My Miss!
[19:36] ---
    Don't you touch her!
[19:45] ---
    H-Hayate...
[19:49] ---
    M-Miss...
[19:54] ---
    Hayate!
[20:03] ---
    Oh, this is bad.
[20:05] ---
    I used up every last ounce
    of my strength doing that,
[20:08] ---
    so I can't even lift a finger now.
[20:13] ---
    Am I... going to die?
[20:19] ---
    I am sorry, Miss.
[20:22] ---
    I wasn't of much use to you...
[20:27] ---
    I am truly sorry.
[20:32] ---
    I am... sorry...
[20:38] ---
    If you're going to apologize for it,
    why don't you wake up already.
[20:42] ---
    What?
[20:44] ---
    What?!
[20:45] ---
    I swear. So you've finally come to.
[20:48] ---
    Hayate!
[20:49] ---
    I'm so glad!
[20:50] ---
    Haya...
[20:50] ---
    Where are we?
[20:51] ---
    Haya...
[20:51] ---
    On board a rescue vessel.
[20:54] ---
    I swear, you were a pain to carry on board.
[20:57] ---
    You saved me?
[20:59] ---
    Not really.
[21:01] ---
    I only saved you because
    the Miss asked me to.
[21:03] ---
    Haya...
[21:04] ---
    I swear! To think a Sanzenin butler
    would be defeated so easily...
[21:04] ---
    Haya... Haya...
[21:07] ---
    Haya...
[21:08] ---
    P-Pardon me.
[21:10] ---
    Haya...
[21:12] ---
    But thank you very much for saving me.
[21:16] ---
    Hey, Hayate! Why are you blushing?!
[21:18] ---
    What's with that background?!
[21:21] ---
    I have no need of thanks from you.
[21:26] ---
    They say that the cold shoulder sets
    men's hearts aflutter for some reason...
[21:31] ---
    And thus, the Miss...
[21:33] ---
    Y-You can't, okay?!
    Anything but that, okay?!
[21:35] ---
    Huh? What are you talking about, Miss?
[21:37] ---
    ...found herself with more to worry about.
[21:40] ---
    Next time, they will fight against
    the anime production schedule.
[21:43] ---
    Freshly caught, freshly made
    shark fin soup in one big gulp!
[21:48] ---
    HOT!
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:16] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:25] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:42] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:52] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:25] ---
    Nagi and...
[23:26] ---
    ...Hayate and...
SIGN    The Katsura Sisters'
SIGN     Lettering by Shizuka Ito
[23:27] ---
    ...the Katsura sisters'...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:30] ---
    I'm Nagi Sanzenin,
    little sister to 100 million people.
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I am Hinagiku Katsura.
[23:35] ---
    I'm Yukiji Katsura, pervy terrorist,
    a message sent from a supernova,
[23:38] ---
    and a national pretty girl.
[23:40] ---
    But with four of us side-by-side,
    this place sure gets crowded.
[23:42] ---
    Well, but if we leave
    Miss Katsura unchecked,
[23:45] ---
    terrible things may happen like
    they did the last two times, so...
[23:48] ---
    Your remarks towards me
    are as scathing as ever, Hayate.
[23:50] ---
    Sis, you're a teacher, so you
    should act more like one...
[23:53] ---
    Oh, it's time.
[23:54] ---
    Bye-bye!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    What do you think? The completed version of "Magical Destroy"!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Um, it doesn't seem
    that different from before...
[24:03] ---
    What?!
[24:04] ---
    After I took it upon myself
    to make revisions targeting the masses,
[24:08] ---
    are you saying it's still
    beyond your comprehension?!
[24:09] ---
    Then I'll explain it to you in the most
    eminently understandable way!
[24:13] ---
    Next time, "The Mystery of the
    120 Employment Rate (Temp.)".
[24:17] ---
    Wait, what in the world is this place?!
[24:18] ---
    It is where the creators of this anime...
[24:18] ---
    The Mystery of the
    120 Employment Rate (Temp.)
[24:20] ---
    Tekset to "Hayate the Combat
    Butler" anime next time!

44 - The Mystery of the 120% Employment Rate (Temp.)

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:10] ---
    Sploosh!
[00:12] ---
    Dun-dun!
SIGN    Synerg SP
[00:19] ---
    Ta-da!
SIGN    End of the Century Legend Magical Destroy
[00:22] ---
    Ma-Ma-Magical Destroy!
[00:28] ---
    My name is Britney!
[00:35] ---
    By all appearances, I'm a fine florist.
[00:40] ---
    But the truth is...
[00:43] ---
    What are you doing?!
[00:45] ---
    Hey, why are you interrupting me?!
[00:47] ---
    This will have people wondering
    what in the world is going on!
[00:50] ---
    As you can see, it's a new opening sequence.
[00:53] ---
    A new opening sequence?
[00:54] ---
    Yes, to commemorate the 44th episode,
[00:57] ---
    we have decided to animate my manga!
[01:00] ---
    Didn't we do something
    similar once before, too?
[01:03] ---
    Furthermore, starting next week,
    we'll have it properly sung by Kotoko!
[01:06] ---
    No, we won't!
[01:08] ---
    And now, please start
    the real opening sequence.
[01:10] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[01:12] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[01:17] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[01:21] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[01:24] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[01:26] ---
    and both have a bit of
    the wrong idea about each other,
[01:28] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[01:34] ---
    This episode of "Hayate the
    Combat Butler" is a work of fiction
[01:36] ---
    and is in no way related
    to real people or organizations.
[01:38] ---
    It always is.
[01:39] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[01:42] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[01:44] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:50] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[01:55] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[02:01] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[02:06] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[02:12] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[02:17] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[02:22] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[02:28] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[02:34] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[02:36] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[02:39] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[02:44] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[02:47] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[02:50] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[03:08] ---
    The Mystery of the 120
    Employment Rate (Temp.)
[03:14] ---
    What do you think? It's the completed
    version of "Magical Destroy"!
[03:17] ---
    You always tell me it's hard to understand
[03:19] ---
    so I tried making it easier.
[03:21] ---
    Um...
[03:22] ---
    Yes, yes?!
[03:23] ---
    It doesn't seem
    that different from before...
[03:27] ---
    What?!
[03:28] ---
    After I restrained my own style
[03:30] ---
    and took it upon myself to make
    revisions targeting the masses,
[03:32] ---
    are you saying it's still
    beyond your comprehension?!
[03:34] ---
    Well, that is easy for you to say, but...
[03:36] ---
    Look here!
[03:37] ---
    The storminess of the Sea
    of Japan here represents the ferocity
[03:41] ---
    of the battle that's about to start, see?!
[03:44] ---
    "Fwahahaha, I have finally
    found you, Britney!"
[03:48] ---
    "Hm? That voice...
    Surely not! Who are you?!"
[03:51] ---
    "I have come all this way to the
    Sea of Japan to defeat you. I am..."
[03:54] ---
    "...your enemy!!!"
[03:55] ---
    "Damn it, my enemy, huh?!!"
[03:57] ---
    "Then, surely, I have
    no choice but to fight!!"
[03:59] ---
    "That's right!! You have
    no choice but to fight!!"
[04:01] ---
    "But since you call yourself my enemy...!!"
[04:03] ---
    "You must be strong!!"
[04:04] ---
    "No, I'm sorry."
[04:06] ---
    "I am not very strong!!!
    Because I am an early enemy."
[04:10] ---
    Wh-What's wrong, Maria?
[04:12] ---
    Um, is this a game of "you lose
    if you poke fun at this"?
[04:15] ---
    What's that supposed to mean?
[04:16] ---
    An enemy has already
    appeared on the 3rd page!
[04:18] ---
    It's a thrilling, suspenseful development!
[04:21] ---
    But he's even saying himself
    that he's not strong...
[04:24] ---
    What is this journey about anyway?
[04:26] ---
    This is interesting, Nagi.
[04:27] ---
    What?!
[04:29] ---
    Or wait, Isumi, when did you get here?!
[04:30] ---
    Ah! That's Isumi for you!
[04:33] ---
    It was so very interesting that I tried
    writing the continuation to it, too.
SIGN    Twinkle
[04:37] ---
    What?!
[04:39] ---
    "A Kitten's Life".
[04:41] ---
    "There was a kitten
    with wings flying in the sky."
[04:48] ---
    "Upon inspecting it from various angles,"
[04:52] ---
    "it turns out it was going
    at 23km per hour."
[04:56] ---
    Wow! That's incredible, Isumi!
    This is the feel I wanted!
[04:59] ---
    Right?
[05:00] ---
    Looks like they're at it again, huh?
[05:02] ---
    Oh, Sakuya. And when did you get here?
[05:04] ---
    Aren't those two incredible?
[05:06] ---
    Yes, their conversation is just
    so out there in another dimension...
[05:09] ---
    Seriously. And they understand each
    other, so it's really somethin'.
[05:12] ---
    But is it really that hard to draw a manga?
[05:15] ---
    Well, if your art is decent
    and the story is carefully told,
[05:18] ---
    you have a reasonable chance
    at winning prizes.
[05:20] ---
    Don't make problematic statements like that!
[05:24] ---
    That reminds me, you've won
    a manga award before, haven't you?
[05:28] ---
    What?!
[05:29] ---
    Wow, that's amazin'!
[05:30] ---
    I have yet to read your manga, too.
[05:33] ---
    I would like to read it as well.
[05:40] ---
    W-Well, not that I mind, but...
[05:43] ---
    "My name is Britney."
[05:45] ---
    "As you can see, I'm an energetic
    part-timer at a flower shop."
[05:48] ---
    "Normally, I'm making a mess of things,
    enticed by the scent of flowers."
SIGN    ROOOAAAARRR
[05:51] ---
    "So I'm always getting
    chewed out by the owner."
[05:53] ---
    "But enticed by the sweet scent
    of those flowers come the bad guys."
[05:58] ---
    "But it's no problem!"
[06:00] ---
    "I make short work of guys like
    that with my magic!"
[06:03] ---
    "That's right, I'm secretly a magical girl."
[06:07] ---
    "The magical girl of flowers, Britney!"
[06:11] ---
    This manga plays it so safe,
    it actually kinda ticks me off.
[06:14] ---
    And it's colored to boot.
[06:16] ---
    Plus, the art is adorable, but there is
    something unwholesome about it.
[06:20] ---
    Well, it doesn't seem
    to be very well-received.
[06:22] ---
    What do you think, Isumi?
[06:24] ---
    It feels like it is aiming
    to be popular from the start...
[06:27] ---
    What?!
[06:28] ---
    Right? With a mocking style like
    this that's pretending to curry favor,
[06:32] ---
    maybe you can fool the judges,
[06:34] ---
    but you won't be able to
    impress the true readers!
[06:38] ---
    I-I see, pardon me.
[06:40] ---
    More importantly, what happens
    in your manga after this, Nagi?
[06:43] ---
    Ah, I'm still in the middle
    of laying out the rest of it.
[06:46] ---
    How 'bout ya at least tell us the plotline?
[06:48] ---
    Yes, I agree.
[06:50] ---
    Ooh! What's this?
[06:51] ---
    You guys want to know
    what happens next, too?!
[06:53] ---
    No, that is not quite why...
[06:54] ---
    Then you leave me
    no choice! I shall tell you!
[06:57] ---
    Yes, yes.
[06:58] ---
    Emerging from the 12th dimension,
SIGN    °Illustrative Images
[07:00] ---
    the great defeated warrior general,
    along with the dark defeated warrior,
[07:03] ---
    turns all of humanity into worker ants
    and tries to conquer the world.
[07:06] ---
    To do this, they first begin buying up
    sugar in the futures market.
SIGN     Futures Market
[07:09] ---
    Due to this, there's
    a worldwide shortage of sugar,
[07:11] ---
    so Britney hardens her resolve
    to travel into the 8th dimension.
[07:13] ---
    Because she super loves cake
    and stuff! Because she's a girl!
[07:16] ---
    But Praying Mantisians come invading
    right around then from nebula M2983
SIGN    Fan Service Images
[07:19] ---
    with their eyes on Earth's
    petroleum resources.
[07:22] ---
    And the ancient Aztecs...
[07:24] ---
    Um, stop there, Nagi.
[07:26] ---
    Why did you stop me?!
    It was just getting to the good part!
[07:28] ---
    How was that getting good?
[07:30] ---
    Miss, if you don't figure out a way
    to make it easier to understand,
[07:33] ---
    you won't get through to people.
[07:35] ---
    Yup, yup. It's all nonsense.
[07:37] ---
    What?! I was explaining it all to you guys!
[07:41] ---
    Right...
[07:42] ---
    I've made up my mind!
[07:45] ---
    Let's see, I was told that it
    should be around here somewhere...
[07:49] ---
    Miss, where in the world are we...?
[07:52] ---
    That's it!
SIGN    Ramen Taro
[07:54] ---
    Wait. Ramen?
[07:56] ---
    Welco...
SIGN    Animago
[08:01] ---
    P-Please take the table in the back.
[08:03] ---
    Good.
[08:11] ---
    Now, I will use the facilities here
    to show you how fantastic my manga is.
[08:16] ---
    I see...
[08:16] ---
    Um, how in the world are you going to
    use the facilities of a ramen shop?
[08:23] ---
    Looks like we're here.
[08:24] ---
    What is this place?!
[08:26] ---
    Could this be that rumor I've heard...?
[08:29] ---
    What?
[08:33] ---
    Quick, quick, quick, quick! Stare!
[08:37] ---
    Cut 82, key animation work done.
[08:39] ---
    I've come to collect the finished work.
[08:41] ---
    Here.
[08:42] ---
    Thanks for your hard work!
[08:44] ---
    Crash! Boom!
[08:46] ---
    I've brought the finished work.
[08:48] ---
    Good.
[08:51] ---
    "Woohoo! But Dad's not here..."
[08:54] ---
    Here.
[08:55] ---
    Thanks for your hard work!
[08:58] ---
    Key animation has been
    checked for performance.
[09:01] ---
    Thanks!
[09:04] ---
    What in the world is this place?
[09:05] ---
    It's a rather anime-ish place...
[09:08] ---
    Yes, this is an anime production studio.
[09:10] ---
    What?!
[09:12] ---
    Just like I suspected.
[09:13] ---
    So the urban myth that anime studios
    disguise themselves as ramen shops,
[09:16] ---
    hidin' at all costs from
    the general populace was true.
[09:21] ---
    I see...
[09:22] ---
    There's an urban myth like that?
[09:24] ---
    My, how mysterious.
[09:26] ---
    Furthermore, this show is a work of fiction
[09:28] ---
    and in no way related
    to the actual industry.
[09:33] ---
    Wow, so this is where they make anime.
[09:36] ---
    It totally has that "studio" feel about it.
[09:38] ---
    I feel like we came here around
    Episode 35, too, though...
[09:40] ---
    That's Miss Segawa,
    Miss Hanabishi, and Miss Asakaze!
[09:44] ---
    Why are they here, too?
[09:45] ---
    Hey, hey, where are the voice actors?
[09:48] ---
    What? Uh, those people are over
    at the recording studio.
[09:52] ---
    What?! They're not here?!
[09:55] ---
    And here I thought
    I'd get to meet Ms. Yahagi!
[09:58] ---
    Wow! It's really moving!
[10:01] ---
    Let's see, I think
    I'll draw something up, too.
SIGN    Rip Roaring Student Council Tankenger
[10:09] ---
    What's wrong, Maria?!
[10:11] ---
    Th-That...
[10:17] ---
    Poke. Poke.
[10:21] ---
    Looks like she's just sleepin'.
[10:23] ---
    I'll manage it somehow
    by the end of the day...
[10:26] ---
    She is not sleeping. She passed out.
[10:28] ---
    A warrior's rest.
[10:31] ---
    By the way, Miss, what
    in the world are we doing here?
[10:33] ---
    I'm going to have them animate
    the continuation of my manga.
[10:36] ---
    What?!
[10:37] ---
    Your manga?!
[10:39] ---
    Animate it?!
[10:40] ---
    Yes, I thought it would be easier
    to understand as an anime
[10:43] ---
    rather than a verbal explanation.
[10:45] ---
    But, but, doesn't the manga
    usually have to succeed first,
[10:47] ---
    before it gets animated?
[10:49] ---
    So exciting. So heart-pounding.
[10:50] ---
    To be continued in the second half!
[10:54] ---
    Terere, terere tte.
[10:57] ---
    Is "terere" some kind of magical spell?
    (Terere tte nanika no jumon nano?)
SIGN    Conference Room
[11:02] ---
    So, with this scene...
[11:04] ---
    It's like Unicron preying upon a planet.
[11:07] ---
    Naturally, we won't be using
    any CG and it'll all be drawn!
[11:09] ---
    And it'll be huge, like
    the climax scene in "Laputa",
[11:12] ---
    and then impressive like
    the opening of the "Patlabor" movie!
[11:14] ---
    Oh, I mean the first movie.
[11:16] ---
    And to finish it off, we have
    the last scene from "Saint Seiya"!
[11:18] ---
    We'll run through the crumbling temple!
[11:18] ---
    Is an explanation like this really
    going to get across to them?
[11:20] ---
    Do it in Mr. Shingo Araki's style.
[11:21] ---
    Who knows?
[11:22] ---
    That's all. Get it done in a week.
[11:26] ---
    Impossible.
[11:27] ---
    This is ridiculous.
[11:28] ---
    You think producing anime
    is easy, don't you?
[11:32] ---
    Hello?
[11:33] ---
    What?!
[11:34] ---
    Y-Yes, I understand!
[11:36] ---
    Hey.
[11:37] ---
    Whisper, whisper, whisper.
[11:38] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[11:40] ---
    We will begin the production
    work right away!
[11:42] ---
    Oh, really? I'll be counting on you.
[11:45] ---
    Off we go!
[11:48] ---
    Hey, Nagi, what the heck did ya do?
[11:50] ---
    No idea. I didn't do anything...
[11:52] ---
    Oh, come to think of it, since this
    company will be making my anime,
[11:56] ---
    there was intel out there
    that their stock would probably go up.
[11:59] ---
    That's gotta be it.
[12:00] ---
    So exciting. So exciting.
[12:00] ---
    Not to sound like a broken record,
    but this is a work of fiction
[12:03] ---
    and is in no way related
    to the actual industry.
[12:03] ---
    So exciting.
[12:05] ---
    And so, yet another anime
    of questionable quality gets made...
[12:09] ---
    Good luck to this show, too!
[12:15] ---
    Are the storyboards still not done?!
[12:16] ---
    I think it's almost done,
[12:18] ---
    but the director said something
    about going to Toys 'R Us
[12:20] ---
    to buy a limited edition figurine...
[12:22] ---
    Send an assistant to do that!
    This is part of their job!
[12:25] ---
    R-Right...
[12:26] ---
    We have quite a bit
    of the design elements in place,
[12:28] ---
    but we don't have enough key animators!
[12:29] ---
    What?!
[12:30] ---
    There's trouble! The animation
    director has suffered tenosynovitis!
[12:33] ---
    What?!
[12:34] ---
    What's going on?
[12:35] ---
    The thing is, we're short
    on animation staff members.
[12:38] ---
    Hey, now, you can't make the anime then.
[12:41] ---
    Can't you poach them from other companies?
[12:44] ---
    Like Kyoto Animation?
[12:45] ---
    Uh, that's a bit...
[12:47] ---
    Well, whatever the case,
[12:49] ---
    the anime based on Miss Nagi's
    original work has entered production.
[13:14] ---
    Looks like we'll make it in time somehow.
[13:16] ---
    And we've managed it
    without casualties, too.
[13:18] ---
    Though, a couple people collapsed.
[13:20] ---
    That's superb.
[13:21] ---
    I guess anime is a harsh industry.
[13:23] ---
    There's trouble!
[13:25] ---
    The company doing the animation
    and finishing work has fled overnight!
[13:27] ---
    What?!
[13:28] ---
    Is it game over?
[13:30] ---
    Hmm, no choice then.
[13:33] ---
    Since it's come to this,
    we will have to utilize that method!
[13:36] ---
    What in the world do you plan to do, Miss?
[13:42] ---
    Now, what should I have for dinner today?
SIGN    Nishizawa
[13:45] ---
    Wh-Wh-Wh-Wha?!
[13:46] ---
    What in the world just happened?
[13:49] ---
    Okay, we've dropped the color
    from the hamster's scene,
[13:52] ---
    so you can shuffle over
    as many staff members as you need.
[13:54] ---
    Are you sure it's okay to do this?
[13:54] ---
    What? What?
[13:56] ---
    This is mean, Little Nagi!
[13:57] ---
    Hey, hey, what is this?
[13:59] ---
    It's called an outline take.
[14:01] ---
    If the art isn't done by the time
    they record the audio,
[14:04] ---
    they make this working footage.
[14:06] ---
    Oh-ho, so it's like a making-of film
[14:09] ---
    that the general audience never gets to see.
[14:11] ---
    Wow, I had no idea this
    was how they made anime.
[14:14] ---
    Yes, and furthermore...
SIGN    Nishizawa
SIGN    Nishizawa
[14:18] ---
    Wh-Wh-Wh-Wh-Wh-Wha?!
SIGN    Nishizawa
[14:19] ---
    What now?!
[14:21] ---
    When the schedule gets tight,
[14:23] ---
    they'll sometimes use art
    from the planning stages.
[14:26] ---
    They may also just use
    the storyboards as is,
SIGN    Nishizawa
[14:28] ---
    or show only a line made
    with a colored marker.
[14:30] ---
    There's a whole lot of various ways!
[14:32] ---
    They don't use film anymore,
    so this no longer happens.
[14:35] ---
    Outline takes are so funny!
[14:38] ---
    This is pretty much how it looks
    when we're recording.
[14:40] ---
    Hey, hey, that's a taboo topic.
[14:43] ---
    It's not like we do that because we want to!
[14:46] ---
    In truth, we'd like the recording
    footage to be in full color.
[14:49] ---
    If only we had more time...
[14:51] ---
    Oh, and a bigger budget.
SIGN    Complete Magical Destroy
[14:53] ---
    Well, we'll leave the inside stories at that
[14:56] ---
    and the anime was finally completed!
[15:01] ---
    I'm starting to get nervous somehow.
[15:03] ---
    Indeed, Miss.
[15:05] ---
    So exciting. So heart-pounding.
[15:07] ---
    I can't wait!
[15:09] ---
    I intend to cry 3 times during this film!
[15:17] ---
    Ah! It's beginning!
[15:19] ---
    Now, let's see what kinda secret
    treasure outrageous anime it's become.
[15:23] ---
    So heart-pounding. So exciting.
[15:25] ---
    Since we have come to this point,
    let us brace ourselves for the worst, Maria.
[15:28] ---
    May as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb.
[15:32] ---
    Hello to all the 130 million
    Girl A's across the nation!
[15:37] ---
    Right now, at Animate,
[15:39] ---
    we're holding the super popular
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" fair!
[15:42] ---
    Grab the merchandise
    in your passionate fists
[15:45] ---
    and slam it down at the cashier along
    with the contents of your wallet!
SIGN    Toranoana
[15:51] ---
    Miss, what are all these?
[15:53] ---
    Tie-ins. Since it's a rare opportunity,
[15:56] ---
    I thought we'd get some commercials, too.
[15:57] ---
    I see...
[15:59] ---
    The show is about to start.
SIGN    Synerg SP
SIGN    End of the Century Legend
    Magical Destroy
[16:09] ---
    Ma-Ma-Magical Destroy!
[16:15] ---
    My name is Britney!
[16:22] ---
    By all appearances, I'm a fine florist.
[16:27] ---
    But the truth is I'm a magical girl!
[16:33] ---
    Original work by Nagi Sanzenin.
[16:39] ---
    A promising new author the entire
    universe has been waiting for.
[16:45] ---
    Here we go!
[16:48] ---
    With a cute heart and a cheery mood!
[16:57] ---
    Britney is always gazing
    upon her senpai from afar.
SIGN    Britney
[17:01] ---
    Huh? What's with this art?
[17:06] ---
    Um, Senpai?
[17:08] ---
    I made lunch, but...
[17:11] ---
    Won't you join me?
[17:14] ---
    Oh, sounds good. I'll have some.
[17:16] ---
    Huh? I'm in this...
[17:18] ---
    So what is going on here?
[17:20] ---
    Britney is desperately
    in love with her senpai,
[17:23] ---
    but, but, she can't tell him how she feels.
[17:25] ---
    Because she's a magical girl.
    No, that's not the reason.
[17:28] ---
    Why? Because her senpai has...
    Because her senpai has...
SIGN    Child
SIGN    Wife
[17:31] ---
    ...a wife and child already.
[17:35] ---
    Th-This turn of events
    is actually really quite shocking...
[17:38] ---
    I'm still not sold on the art, though.
[17:43] ---
    The more you mix...
[17:44] ---
    But you see, because
    of the evil witch's powers...
[17:47] ---
    ...the more it sticks!
[17:51] ---
    ...her senpai was turned into a star!
[17:57] ---
    Due to this, his wife fell ill
[17:59] ---
    and his child became a delinquent.
[18:04] ---
    If I'm in danger of losing
    an online match, cut the connection!
[18:09] ---
    The tension's building
    more than I'd expected.
[18:12] ---
    Britney resolves to turn her
    senpai back to how he was.
[18:15] ---
    But even if she can accomplish this,
[18:18] ---
    her senpai will only return to his wife.
[18:20] ---
    He and Britney will never be together.
[18:24] ---
    But if she continues this journey,
[18:27] ---
    she will get to spend time with
    her senpai. Even though he's a star.
[18:31] ---
    What will she do? What will Britney do?
[18:32] ---
    And Britney's decision was...!
SIGN    A Kitten's Life
[18:38] ---
    A Kitten's Life.
[18:40] ---
    Tmp, tmp, tmp, tmp.
[18:42] ---
    Tmp, tmp, tmp, tmp.
[18:45] ---
    Running speed is mach 5.
[18:48] ---
    But no matter how fast you run,
    you can never reach the sun.
SIGN    The End
[18:53] ---
    The end.
[18:59] ---
    Y-You really are a genius, Isumi!
[19:02] ---
    Right?
[19:05] ---
    Well? Do you now
    at least see how my manga...
[19:08] ---
    Wait, what's wrong?
[19:22] ---
    Come in.
[19:24] ---
    Oh? Maria?
[19:26] ---
    Oh, Hayate.
[19:27] ---
    Could it be that you are also...?
[19:29] ---
    If you are asking if I am "also",
    does that mean you are also...?
[19:33] ---
    Yes, I thought I would read
    the Miss's manga one more time.
[19:37] ---
    Since she worked so hard
    to write it, after all.
[19:41] ---
    Yes, we should try to understand her better.
[19:44] ---
    Also, I was rather curious
    to know what happens after that
[19:47] ---
    to Britney and her senpai.
[19:50] ---
    I was a bit, too.
[19:52] ---
    But Hayate...
[19:54] ---
    What is it?
[19:55] ---
    Which do you suppose Britney
    will choose in the end?
[19:59] ---
    Will she wish to be with him? Or...?
[20:05] ---
    But it looks like Nagi hasn't
    written past that point.
[20:09] ---
    Then I suppose that means the Miss
    is having a hard time deciding as well?
[20:13] ---
    As to how to end this romance...
[20:15] ---
    But if it were you, which would you choose?
[20:18] ---
    What? M-Me?
[20:20] ---
    Hmm, let me think...
[20:24] ---
    If that senpai were you,
[20:26] ---
    maybe it wouldn't be bad to keep you
    in the shape of a star forever.
[20:29] ---
    There you go again, teasing me.
[20:33] ---
    Oh! Then you try writing it!
[20:36] ---
    What? M-Me?
[20:38] ---
    But I've never drawn manga
    or anything, so...
[20:42] ---
    Then all the more reason to.
[20:43] ---
    I-I could not, Hayate. Please, I...
[20:47] ---
    If I'm a man, I'll conquer all
    the heroines simultaneously!
[20:51] ---
    Gloom...
[20:52] ---
    Wait, so who is this, Maria?
[20:56] ---
    You.
[20:57] ---
    No, please, "conquer all the heroines
    simultaneously"? What am I, a brute?
[21:01] ---
    Do you have a problem
    with that? In that case...
[21:04] ---
    Huh?
[21:05] ---
    You must be sure to make your choice.
[21:09] ---
    Okay, now you try drawing it, Hayate.
[21:12] ---
    What? But...
[21:14] ---
    Honestly, you are such an indecisive person.
[21:16] ---
    This was a story about how fiction
    sometimes reflects reality and vice versa.
[21:22] ---
    And now, next time...
[21:22] ---
    Hold it! Hold it!
[21:26] ---
    Whew. We almost forgot the fan service shot.
[21:29] ---
    Or rather, even the fan service
    is too avant-garde!
[21:32] ---
    Please enjoy these
    to take away the bad after-taste.
[21:40] ---
    These are not to make sure
    the episode is long enough.
[21:42] ---
    "Hayate the Combat Butler"
    has fantastic fan service!
[21:45] ---
    Let's be sure to watch again next time!
[21:48] ---
    Wait! Does this count as fan service?!
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:17] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:25] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:42] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:52] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
SIGN    Student Council Girl Trio
SIGN    Lettering by Sayuri Yahagi
[23:26] ---
    The student council girl
    trio's Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    I'm Izumi Segawa.
[23:30] ---
    I'm Risa Asakaze.
[23:32] ---
    Hey, I'm Miki Hanabishi.
[23:33] ---
    At last, the fruit of our
    friendship and hard work...
[23:35] ---
    The student council girl
    trio's theme song is complete!
[23:37] ---
    It was a long process.
[23:39] ---
    This song is perfect
    for broadcasting at school.
[23:40] ---
    It'll be great to play it at cleaning time.
[23:42] ---
    It's also perfect for going
    for a drive with your girlfriend.
[23:43] ---
    Even she'll fall head over heels
    with this song playing on the car stereo!
[23:46] ---
    It's also perfect
    for lonely people living alone!
[23:48] ---
    It might give you the energy to live!
[23:49] ---
    Starting this week, we'll be showing you
[23:50] ---
    fan service scenes of ours
    for the next segments!
[23:52] ---
    It's me this time!
[23:53] ---
    Next time, it'll be me!
[23:54] ---
    Adieu!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    Where in the world are we
    going out to all of a sudden?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    Oh, I wonder where.
[24:01] ---
    You'll have to wait to get there to see.
[24:03] ---
    I see...
[24:04] ---
    And so, we call it "Thank you
    for everything, Maria.
[24:07] ---
    "The big sister appreciation
    day relaxation plan!"
[24:09] ---
    Thank you for always working so hard for us!
[24:11] ---
    Staying in a midtown hotel,
[24:12] ---
    going to the spa and
    getting beauty treatments...
[24:14] ---
    Forget about work
    and just sit back and relax!
[24:16] ---
    Next time, "It Is Maria Appreciation
    Day! In February (heart)".
[24:19] ---
    It Is Maria Appreciation Day! In February
[24:20] ---
    Prism Flash on "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" again next time!

45 - It is Maria Appreciation Day! In February <3

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
SIGN    Roasted Sweet Potatoes
[00:21] ---
    Yum!
[00:25] ---
    It's February already...
[00:27] ---
    And I have yet to even see
    Hayate once this year...
[00:31] ---
    But my greatest opportunity
    of the year is coming up soon!
[00:34] ---
    That's right! For a young lady, the big event in February is...!
[00:39] ---
    Oh, please! Mister, how could
    you in front of a young lady?!
[00:41] ---
    Me?!
[00:46] ---
    Demons be gone!
[00:49] ---
    Good fortune, stay within!
[00:50] ---
    Demons be gone!
[00:52] ---
    Um, why are you doing this now?
[00:55] ---
    Hey, now, what are you saying, Maria?
[00:58] ---
    That's right. When it comes
    to the big event in February,
[01:00] ---
    there could be nothing else but
    the bean-throwing exorcism ceremony!
[01:04] ---
    Well, I don't really care, but...
[01:06] ---
    Nagi, it's late, so get ready for bed.
[01:10] ---
    Right.
[01:11] ---
    Then to wrap things up, we'll eat
    as many beans as we are old.
[01:15] ---
    Here.
[01:15] ---
    Oh, yes.
[01:18] ---
    Hey, Maria, you want some, too?
[01:20] ---
    Oh, I suppose.
    It's for good luck, after all.
[01:27] ---
    What's wrong? All three of you are staring.
[01:31] ---
    N-Nothing!
[01:32] ---
    Oh, it's nothing!
[01:39] ---
    Don't tell me...
[01:40] ---
    Were you thinking, "Huh?
    Aren't there too few beans here?"
[01:44] ---
    Oh, no! Nothing like that!
[01:46] ---
    No matter who looks at you,
    you're a young and fresh 17-year-old!
[01:51] ---
    Then why are you all covered in sweat?
[02:00] ---
    All three of you, hurry up and go to sleep!
[02:02] ---
    A demon!
[02:04] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[02:06] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[02:11] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[02:15] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[02:18] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[02:20] ---
    and both have a bit of the
    wrong idea about each other,
[02:22] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[02:28] ---
    I swear!
[02:29] ---
    Oh, my back... Owowowow...
[02:33] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:36] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:38] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:44] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[02:49] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[02:55] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[03:00] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[03:06] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[03:11] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[03:16] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[03:22] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[03:28] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[03:30] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[03:33] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[03:38] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[03:41] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[03:44] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[04:03] ---
    It is Maria Appreciation Day! In February
SIGN    Video Rental V Tachibana
[04:10] ---
    Good grief. We ended up
    offending Maria again.
[04:14] ---
    Indeed.
[04:15] ---
    Don't make too much trouble for her.
[04:17] ---
    She's not going to be
    young forever, you know.
[04:20] ---
    Don't say something so terrible!
[04:20] ---
    Please do not say such a terrible thing!
[04:23] ---
    But Maria works non-stop.
[04:25] ---
    No matter what kind
    of expert she is as a maid,
[04:27] ---
    it's a fact that she must
    have a lot of built up fatigue.
[04:30] ---
    She is always being so good to us.
[04:33] ---
    It would be nice if we could
    show her our appreciation somehow.
[04:36] ---
    All right! This is where
    I'll become a maid and...!
[04:39] ---
    I-If you do that, it will be
    even more exhausting for Maria.
[04:43] ---
    But she's not the sort to take a break
    just because you tell her to.
[04:46] ---
    Th-That's true...
[04:48] ---
    I know!
[04:49] ---
    I have just the right plan for you.
[04:52] ---
    A plan?
[04:55] ---
    Approximately an hour later...
[04:59] ---
    What is going on?
[05:02] ---
    Where in the world
    are we going all of a sudden?
[05:04] ---
    Oh, I wonder where.
[05:07] ---
    You'll have to wait to get there to see.
[05:20] ---
    This is...
[05:21] ---
    We are going to be staying here today!
[05:24] ---
    What?!
[05:25] ---
    Saki actually gave us a great idea, you see.
[05:29] ---
    Ladies' Stay Plan, Relaxation Tour?
[05:32] ---
    My friends went there the other day.
[05:35] ---
    You stay at a luxurious midtown hotel,
[05:37] ---
    go to the spa and get beauty treatments...
[05:38] ---
    You just sit back and relax.
[05:40] ---
    It's like rewarding yourself
    for your hard work.
[05:42] ---
    I hear it's popular among
    working young women.
[05:45] ---
    Working...
[05:46] ---
    ...young women...
[05:48] ---
    Young... Young... Young!
[05:51] ---
    Is that the key?
[05:52] ---
    Yes, this is it! Make the
    arrangements right away, Hayate!
[05:56] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[05:58] ---
    And so, we call it "Thank you
    for everything, Maria.
[06:01] ---
    "The big sister appreciation
    relaxation plan!"
[06:04] ---
    What?! B-But... um...
[06:06] ---
    This is a present from the Miss
    to show you her appreciation
[06:09] ---
    for what you do every day.
[06:11] ---
    Thank you for always working
    so hard for us, Maria.
[06:14] ---
    But for today and tomorrow,
[06:15] ---
    forget about your work and enjoy
    a day off in the city at your leisure.
[06:19] ---
    I-I see...
[06:21] ---
    Thank you very much.
[06:23] ---
    Then I will take you up on your offer
    and take a nice long break...
[06:26] ---
    Good. Work off that fatigue
    to your heart's content!
[06:29] ---
    Then let us go.
[06:30] ---
    Yes.
[06:33] ---
    Welcome!
[06:39] ---
    I never imagined Hayata and
    his gang would be coming to stay here.
[06:47] ---
    Then I shall take that room.
[06:49] ---
    I guess Maria and I will
    take the room over here.
[06:51] ---
    Oh, then I shall start
    by getting the tea ready.
[06:54] ---
    You are on break, so please take it easy.
[06:58] ---
    Oh, y-yes, that's right.
[07:01] ---
    Hayate has made all kinds
    of arrangements for us.
[07:02] ---
    Hello? This is the Imperial Suite.
    We would like some room service.
[07:03] ---
    The pool, the jacuzzi, the gym,
    plus the nail and beauty salons.
[07:05] ---
    Um, a pot of royal milk tea, please.
[07:06] ---
    You'll have free access to all of them.
[07:08] ---
    I see...
[07:09] ---
    It seems this hotel's selling point
    is their service towards young women.
[07:13] ---
    What?
[07:13] ---
    It's truly perfect for you,
    a working young woman!
[07:17] ---
    You needn't emphasize the
    "young" part so much...
[07:22] ---
    Please excuse me. Room service.
[07:26] ---
    Oh, yes, thank you!
[07:30] ---
    What do you think?
    Don't I look cool? Surprised?
[07:34] ---
    Committee Chairman! Why?
[07:36] ---
    It's a one-day hands-on
    internship through our school.
[07:39] ---
    I heard about this on the news before.
[07:42] ---
    Oh!
[07:44] ---
    I see!
[07:45] ---
    What is it, Hayate?
[07:46] ---
    Oh, no, today was specially
    discounted by 5 for some reason.
[07:50] ---
    That's why I settled on this place, but...
[07:52] ---
    I see.
[07:54] ---
    Yes! Today, this hotel is riddled
    with people from Hakuou.
[07:58] ---
    I saw Hayate and his gang just earlier!
[08:00] ---
    Oh, is that all?
[08:02] ---
    Darn. I was hoping we might
    get to see Yoshizumi or Orlando.
[08:06] ---
    Yoshizumi? Because the Tokyo Metropolitan
    Government building is right in front of us?
[08:09] ---
    Well, never mind. Anyway, where's Hina?
[08:11] ---
    She got caught by the manager.
[08:15] ---
    Now that I think back,
    it was during the Tokyo Olympics.
[08:18] ---
    That was when I got into this line of work.
[08:20] ---
    I don't get what he's saying at all...
[08:22] ---
    Come on, Hayate!
[08:23] ---
    We came here so Maria
    could have a relaxing time!
[08:26] ---
    Pardon me. My thrifty habits
    got the better of me...
[08:27] ---
    Hot!
[08:29] ---
    Oh, I'll do that.
[08:31] ---
    Thank you, Maria.
[08:33] ---
    Look! It's already happening!
[08:34] ---
    Maria, I'll do that!
[08:36] ---
    You know...
[08:37] ---
    So, what are you guys doing here anyway?
[08:41] ---
    Th-The truth is...
[08:46] ---
    That's great! I'm so moved!
[08:50] ---
    Okay, I'll help you!
    I'll ask everyone to help, too!
[08:52] ---
    Oh, Miss Segawa!
[08:53] ---
    Oh, I have a tremendously...
[08:55] ---
    ...bad feeling about this...
[08:58] ---
    Um, if it's about me,
    please don't let it bother you.
[09:01] ---
    I am already relaxing more than enough.
[09:03] ---
    No! We cannot lose heart now!
[09:06] ---
    We will protect Maria's
    day off, no matter what!
[09:08] ---
    Let us split up!
[09:10] ---
    Miss, you and Maria will go
    on to Stage 2 of the Plan!
[09:13] ---
    We will meet again here in 3 hours!
[09:14] ---
    Leave it to me, Hayate!
[09:16] ---
    Oh, uh, um, wait...
[09:17] ---
    Th-This is starting
    to look a bit like a battle...
[09:22] ---
    It was true. In a certain sense,
    it was a battle.
[09:33] ---
    How's it going, Maria?
    Are you working off that fatigue good?
[09:35] ---
    Yes! Thank you very much.
[09:38] ---
    My! How fabulous!
    It's like a rose petal bath.
[09:41] ---
    Oh, but this is the pool...
[09:43] ---
    That's strange. I don't recall
    asking for such a service.
[09:47] ---
    No thanks needed. In exchange, take this.
[09:47] ---
    Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho! Heave-ho!
SIGN    Bill to: Sanzenin Nagi Roses
[09:54] ---
    What?!
[09:55] ---
    Um, who might you be?
[09:57] ---
    Hey, Himuro, is that enough now?
[10:00] ---
    That was satisfactory. Did you
    learn something, Little Master Taiga?
[10:03] ---
    Yeah! It's tough to have to work.
[10:06] ---
    Meanwhile, as for Hayate...
[10:08] ---
    Oh, man... The people of Hakuou
    are already here, too...
[10:12] ---
    What is the matter, Young Master?
[10:14] ---
    At that rate, it w‎ill be
    utterly impossible for you
[10:15] ---
    My hand is my foot... My foot is my hand...
[10:18] ---
    to satisfactorily entertain the guests!
[10:18] ---
    My neck...
[10:23] ---
    All right!
[10:24] ---
    Let's pull ourselves together
    and go for beauty treatments next!
[10:27] ---
    Do your best to get that fatigue
    worked off for sure this time!
[10:29] ---
    I-I-I will, but Nagi...
SIGN    Super Special Marvelous Anti-Aging Course
[10:33] ---
    About this "Super Special
    Marvelous Anti-Aging Course"...
[10:37] ---
    Don't sweat the details! I'll be next door!
[10:41] ---
    I have been waiting for you.
[10:43] ---
    Gack! Y-You're that piece-of-junk robot!
[10:45] ---
    Now, please come this way.
[10:48] ---
    Hey, you're actually pretty good.
[10:51] ---
    Well, of course, because I'm always
    doing massages for Miss Makimura.
[11:03] ---
    Now, then, I guess I'll do my best
    to work off my fatigue, too.
[11:06] ---
    Hey!
[11:09] ---
    I heard about what's going
    on from Miss Segawa.
[11:11] ---
    Wh-Why are you here, too?
[11:13] ---
    It was a nice opportunity
[11:15] ---
    and I thought I'd learn
    a trade, so I'll be fine,
[11:18] ---
    if I ever get fired from my teaching job.
[11:20] ---
    I-I see...
[11:22] ---
    Now, just leave it to me!
[11:24] ---
    I'll use all my powers to totally
    work off that fatigue of yours!
[11:27] ---
    I-I sense a rather serious error...
[11:29] ---
    I mean, I sense danger here.
[11:32] ---
    Oh, there goes my fatigue!
[11:37] ---
    Oh, there goes my fatigue!
    My fatigue's totally going away!
[11:38] ---
    You seem to be awfully weary, Miss Katsura!
[11:45] ---
    You know, somehow, I'm already 28 years old.
[11:49] ---
    Is it okay that I'm still up
    to the same old silliness?
[11:51] ---
    I wonder sometimes, you see?
[11:54] ---
    But you are still you, after all.
[11:58] ---
    No matter how you agonize over it,
    you'll never be someone else.
[12:01] ---
    Please be true to yourself.
[12:03] ---
    Though, please do be careful
    not to drink too much.
[12:06] ---
    See how your liver acupoint is?
[12:11] ---
    Thank you, Maria!
[12:12] ---
    I feel like I've met a great senpai of life!
[12:17] ---
    But um, I'm over 10 years
    younger than you...
[12:22] ---
    Hey, Maria, is something wrong?
[12:25] ---
    I just got a whiff of something ominous...
[12:27] ---
    O-Oh, no, it's nothing at all!
[12:34] ---
    I just got a sense that
    something sinister is coming...
[12:45] ---
    Your new outfit suits you
    very well, Mistress Kuzuha!
[12:49] ---
    Ah, yes, I special ordered it from COSPA.
[12:51] ---
    I believe that in the end, I ought to
    always be dressed up in formal attire.
[12:55] ---
    You look fabulous, Mistress Kuzuha.
[12:57] ---
    All right, Sion.
[12:58] ---
    Before I inspect this place, I am going
    to raise my blood sugar level a bit!
[13:00] ---
    Yes, Mistress Kuzuha!
[13:02] ---
    Gack!
[13:04] ---
    To be continued, in an ever less
    soothing and relaxing direction.
[13:09] ---
    Laid back and relaxed.
    (Nonbiri yuttari.)
[13:12] ---
    Rhythmically start the word game!
    (Rizumu de shiritori sutaato!)
[13:14] ---
    Tan-tan, nta-nta, paseru!
[13:18] ---
    I wonder if they are both enjoying
    their relaxed day off in the city.
[13:25] ---
    Hey, Hayate, I'm back!
[13:27] ---
    Welcome back. Wait, um, where's Maria?
[13:30] ---
    She's going for a stroll around the garden
    or something and taking it easy.
[13:34] ---
    She's taking it easy?!
[13:36] ---
    That's right! She's taking it easy!
[13:43] ---
    Hold on!
[13:44] ---
    If Maria isn't going to be coming
    back to the room for a while...
[13:49] ---
    Hayate and I will be alone together?!
[13:51] ---
    I will make us some tea now.
[13:53] ---
    A-And we're in a suite, like the kind
    a newly-wed couple might stay in!
[14:00] ---
    Is something the matter?
[14:01] ---
    I-It's nothing!
[14:07] ---
    Even taking a break
    is not easily accomplished.
[14:11] ---
    But those two have shown
    such concern for me...
[14:17] ---
    While we're here, I should do
    as they wish and take it easy.
[14:22] ---
    Um...
[14:24] ---
    Isumi!
[14:25] ---
    Um, um, I would like to ask you...
[14:28] ---
    Could it be that this is where
    Hakuou's internship is...?
[14:31] ---
    Yes, that's right...
[14:35] ---
    I am so happy!
[14:37] ---
    Here we are in Episode 45
[14:38] ---
    and for the first time
    I have reached my destination!
[14:41] ---
    I was afraid that I would never
    reach it for the rest of my life
[14:45] ---
    and I felt such uncertainty
    and anxiety and confusion...
[14:45] ---
    Let us start by going to
    the front desk together.
[14:50] ---
    But I never expected that you would
    participate in an event like this.
[14:55] ---
    I thought I would use this opportunity
[14:57] ---
    to learn a little about the ways of society.
[14:59] ---
    Oh, Maria!
[15:01] ---
    Oh, ladies of Hakuou.
[15:02] ---
    Maria! Maria!
[15:07] ---
    Is something the matter?
[15:09] ---
    You do not seem to have been
    focusing for a while now.
[15:11] ---
    I-It's because it's a bit too quiet.
[15:14] ---
    Let's turn the TV on!
[15:16] ---
    I love you, Mr. Sanma!
[15:18] ---
    Not good! This will put Hayate in the mood!
[15:21] ---
    I love you, but it's too soon
    for us! It's too soon!
[15:24] ---
    Oh, I actually like
    this actress quite a bit.
[15:28] ---
    She's gained a noticeable glow about her
[15:30] ---
    since she split with that kabuki actor.
[15:32] ---
    Wha?!
[15:33] ---
    But what is Maria doing?!
[15:35] ---
    How much freedom must she enjoy?!
[15:38] ---
    She's actually not taking it easy.
[15:42] ---
    See? Make sure to also tuck in
    the top sheet properly
[15:46] ---
    and then line up the bedcover neatly.
[15:48] ---
    That's the key to making it look beautiful.
[15:50] ---
    Thank you, Maria!
[15:52] ---
    Whoa! I accidentally double-booked a room!
[15:57] ---
    Hello? I am so very sorry.
[16:00] ---
    If you would like a twin bed instead
    of a double, we could arrange that.
[16:04] ---
    Thank you, Maria!
[16:06] ---
    Ah, yes.
[16:07] ---
    I came here and started working
[16:09] ---
    in the year of the Japan
    World Exposition. Back in 1971.
[16:13] ---
    Oh, please, sir.
[16:15] ---
    The Japan World Exposition was in 1970.
[16:17] ---
    What?
[16:18] ---
    As I recall, total attendance
    was 64,218,770.
[16:23] ---
    77 countries participated, including Japan,
[16:26] ---
    as well as 4 international organizations.
[16:29] ---
    P-Please excuse me for a moment.
[16:34] ---
    Thank you, Maria.
[16:36] ---
    But you're on break, aren't you?
    Shouldn't you be taking it easy?
[16:40] ---
    Please do not tell Nagi
    and Hayate about this.
[16:44] ---
    Sir! There's trouble! Big trouble!
[16:46] ---
    Wait... Maripon, what are you doing here?
[16:49] ---
    Maripon?
[16:50] ---
    Hello, Miss Makimura.
[16:52] ---
    Um, could it be that
    you two know each other?
[16:55] ---
    Yes, well, you could say that.
[16:57] ---
    I'm so glad!
[16:58] ---
    There's something I want you
    to help me with, Mariachi!
[17:01] ---
    Mariachi?
[17:02] ---
    Is something the matter?
[17:04] ---
    The thing is, the cafeteria is just
    all "high school" and it's bad!
[17:12] ---
    Miss, please don't hold back the 6.
[17:14] ---
    Huh? I dunno what you're talking about.
[17:15] ---
    There are only two of us here!
[17:21] ---
    Hello?
[17:22] ---
    Oh, Mari...
[17:23] ---
    Shh! Don't let her know I'm calling you.
[17:26] ---
    What?
[17:27] ---
    Um, you see, the truth is...
[17:33] ---
    I wonder what Maria wants...
[17:37] ---
    M-Maria!
[17:39] ---
    I was cleaning when I found
    something a guest had left behind.
[17:43] ---
    What was the room number?
[17:44] ---
    We'll look up the guest's
    contact information.
[17:46] ---
    Um, where's the concierge?
[17:49] ---
    He was over there just a moment ago.
[17:50] ---
    Um, excuse me.
[17:53] ---
    Oh, ni hao. Wo jiao Maria.
[17:55] ---
    Maria.
[17:57] ---
    Please don't tell Nagi about this.
[18:00] ---
    Certainly, I understand.
[18:02] ---
    So, what did you need me for?
[18:03] ---
    Would you mind doing something for us?
[18:08] ---
    Is the next sweet ready yet?!
[18:10] ---
    Please forgive us!
[18:12] ---
    Our patissier was creating sweets
    at a furious pace to keep up with you,
[18:16] ---
    but he has collapsed
    due to utter exhaustion...
[18:19] ---
    How feeble of him!
    I have still not had enough to eat!
[18:21] ---
    Thank you for your patience.
[18:23] ---
    This is our special mont blanc
    from our secret menu.
[18:28] ---
    Th-This is...!
[18:33] ---
    This rich, yet refreshing sweetness,
    which envelops the tongue like velvet!
[18:38] ---
    So it is delicious?!
[18:41] ---
    Yum-o!
[18:44] ---
    Yes, I am satisfied.
[18:45] ---
    I am canceling my inspection!
[18:47] ---
    I am going to return to the academy
    before this aftertaste vanishes!
[18:49] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am!
[18:51] ---
    But wow, Maria's recipe worked like a charm.
[18:55] ---
    Of course, because it's been
    proven effective before.
[18:58] ---
    Oh, no. Ignore what I just said.
[19:00] ---
    What are you doing here, Miss Makimura?
[19:03] ---
    What am I doing? I'm just
    reading a book and eating cake...
[19:07] ---
    No, I mean, what about providing guidance
    for the interns or something?
[19:10] ---
    Oh, hey! You're appalled, aren't you?!
[19:12] ---
    Cake is important for the brain, you know!
[19:17] ---
    Then please show him
    to the washroom immediately.
[19:20] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[19:23] ---
    Maria! I knew it had to be you!
[19:25] ---
    That cake tasted the same as what
    I once had during the school festival.
[19:29] ---
    It has been a long time.
[19:38] ---
    It has been a while since I have been
    fully satisfied. You have my thanks.
[19:40] ---
    Do as you see fit!
[19:45] ---
    Now, I think it's about time
    I got back to Nagi.
[19:48] ---
    Nothing happened after that
    and the day ended.
[19:53] ---
    I'm so tired. I'm hungry.
[19:56] ---
    Then, want to eat something on the way home?
[19:58] ---
    But...
[19:59] ---
    You don't have any money,
    right? We'll treat you.
[20:02] ---
    Really?! Woohoo!
[20:04] ---
    Sis...
[20:05] ---
    Don't you have any pride as an adult?
[20:08] ---
    It's fine! Because
    I'm gonna be true to myself!
[20:19] ---
    It's unusual for her
    to fall asleep at this hour.
[20:22] ---
    I wonder if the unfamiliar
    surroundings wore her out.
[20:25] ---
    The Miss was really geared up, after all.
[20:28] ---
    She was determined that you
    were going to have a good time.
[20:31] ---
    Then I will see you tomorrow.
[20:33] ---
    Yes, good night.
[20:37] ---
    I see, Maria. So your
    exhaustion's disappeared.
[20:41] ---
    I'm glad. I'm grateful
    for everything you do.
[20:55] ---
    Being at the residence really is the best!
[20:57] ---
    What?
[20:58] ---
    Then what about the appreciation tour?
[21:00] ---
    Oh, thank you very much to both of you.
[21:03] ---
    I am the one who should be grateful.
[21:06] ---
    But seeing the bright smiles on your faces
[21:08] ---
    and the faces of everyone
    here at the residence
[21:11] ---
    is the best gift there is.
[21:21] ---
    Ah, that is wonderful to hear!
[21:22] ---
    I look forward to continuing
    to work with you, Maria.
[21:25] ---
    Certainly.
[21:26] ---
    By the way, your skin
    is shiny smooth, Maria!
[21:29] ---
    Maybe that Super Special Marvelous
    Anti-Aging Course worked, after all!
[21:33] ---
    You practically look like a young lady!
[21:35] ---
    You truly look rejuvenated, Maria!
[21:38] ---
    I see. So 17 is no longer a young lady...
[21:42] ---
    Or am I really...
[21:44] ---
    Uh, no! No, you're not, Maria!
[21:47] ---
    And so, next time, they'll battle
    the brilliant sweat of youth!
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:17] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:26] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:35] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:43] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:53] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
SIGN    Student Council Girl Trio
SIGN    Lettering by Eri Nakao
[23:26] ---
    The student council girl
    trio's Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:30] ---
    Hey, there, friends, I'm Izumi Segawa.
[23:32] ---
    I'm Risa Asakaze.
[23:33] ---
    I am the warrior of freedom, Miki Hanabishi.
[23:34] ---
    Those of you watching TV
[23:36] ---
    are naturally certain to have
    memorized our image song already.
[23:38] ---
    Of course, because they should be listening
    to it at least 100 times a day!
[23:41] ---
    We have happy news for you!
[23:42] ---
    If you collect 10 belly bands
    from our CDs and send it in...
[23:45] ---
    You won't win anything in particular!
[23:46] ---
    Ooh! That's amazing!
[23:48] ---
    And now, here's today's fan service
    shot you've been waiting for.
[23:50] ---
    Ooh, this one's pervy!
[23:52] ---
    Man, talk about daring,
    first thing in the morning!
[23:54] ---
    Farewell!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    What the heck is going on here?! Tell me!
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    You ask the most nonsense
    questions sometimes, you know that?
[24:02] ---
    It's weird, isn't it?!
[24:03] ---
    Isumi put on a blazer and got
    on a bus with no hesitation!
[24:06] ---
    Maybe she's fallen
    for a guy at another school,
[24:08] ---
    so she's sneaking in
    by wearing their uniform.
[24:10] ---
    What?!
[24:11] ---
    Next time, "His Name Is
    Magic Ball Pitcher Wataru!!!"
[24:13] ---
    The Young Sir won't come to me
    for advice, and yet...
[24:16] ---
    No, it's probably
    because it's easier for him
[24:17] ---
    to talk to Miss Nagi, who is his age,
[24:19] ---
    or some other equally trivial reason.
[24:19] ---
    His Name Is Magic
    Ball Pitcher Wataru!!!
[24:20] ---
    And so, Cross Triangle with "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" again next time!

46 - His Name is Magic Ball Pitcher Wataru

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:04] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:10] ---
    One morning, the boy found
    himself in the Twilight Zone.
[00:16] ---
    What?
[00:17] ---
    WHAT?!
[00:26] ---
    That's...
[00:27] ---
    It can't be!
[00:29] ---
    Panning vertically!
[00:31] ---
    A close-up horizontal pan!
[00:34] ---
    I-It's Isumi!
[00:36] ---
    But what's with her outfit?
[00:41] ---
    Kid, you're digging it, aren't you?
[00:48] ---
    What?! She's getting on
    a bus with no hesitation!
[00:55] ---
    Th-This can't be...
[00:56] ---
    I'm getting on!
[00:56] ---
    Go return the utility pole.
[00:58] ---
    Oh, whoops!
[00:59] ---
    Or Tokyo Electric Power Company
    is going to yell at you.
[01:02] ---
    You're right.
[01:03] ---
    Ta-da!
[01:05] ---
    I'm getting on...
[01:08] ---
    I didn't make it on!
[01:10] ---
    You brought that on yourself.
[01:14] ---
    Isumi...
[01:17] ---
    What the heck is going on here?! Tell me!
[01:20] ---
    You don't come over often, but when you do,
[01:22] ---
    you ask the most nonsensical
    questions, you know that?
[01:24] ---
    But I mean, a blazer!
[01:25] ---
    The answer to that is simple.
[01:27] ---
    You haven't seen Isumi lately, have you?
[01:30] ---
    Oh, well, I've been busy
    with finals and stuff.
[01:34] ---
    What you saw was a hallucination!
[01:37] ---
    A hallu...cination?
[01:39] ---
    It's got to be a hallucination!
[01:41] ---
    Right now, everyone in town
    looks like Isumi to you!
[01:44] ---
    There's no way that's true!
    That was definitely Isumi!
[01:48] ---
    Then how about this?!
[01:50] ---
    She's probably fallen for
    a guy at another school,
[01:52] ---
    so she's sneaking in by
    wearing their uniform.
[01:55] ---
    Who the heck goes to such lengths?
[01:57] ---
    Well, we like in a "Hana-Kimi" sort of world,
[02:00] ---
    where girls disguise themselves as
    guys to get into all-boys' schools
[02:02] ---
    just to see a good-looking guy she adores.
[02:04] ---
    But you're putting on an awfully nuanced
    performance at a time like this.
[02:07] ---
    I guess...
[02:08] ---
    But I had no idea the world
    had progressed that far.
[02:12] ---
    That's right.
[02:12] ---
    Technical High School
[02:13] ---
    Whether there's a school gate there!
[02:15] ---
    No vandalizing!!
[02:15] ---
    Or a wall!
[02:16] ---
    Or nurikabe wall monsters!
[02:18] ---
    Climbing over them all is
    what it means to be a girl!
[02:20] ---
    Could it be...?
[02:22] ---
    Could it be...
[02:23] ---
    ...that Isumi is...
[02:24] ---
    Do Not Climb
[02:24] ---
    ...trying to climb over?!
[02:26] ---
    Up we go.
[02:30] ---
    Pardon me, we could not
    help overhearing that.
[02:33] ---
    No worries.
[02:34] ---
    I wouldn't say it's entirely impossible,
[02:36] ---
    but don't cases like the one you
    outlined tend to be exceptional?
[02:38] ---
    I don't see the need to be
    so hard on a boy in distress.
[02:41] ---
    It's fun to mess with him.
[02:43] ---
    I mean, Isumi in a blazer getting on a bus!
[02:45] ---
    Well, it's too bad it's not a
    sailor suit and a machine gun.
[02:48] ---
    That's way old.
[02:49] ---
    It sounds interesting, so go
    investigate it for me, Hayate.
[02:51] ---
    I'll be counting on you.
[02:52] ---
    Miss, just because it sounds interesting...
[02:55] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[02:57] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[03:02] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[03:06] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[03:09] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[03:11] ---
    and both have a bit of the
    wrong idea about each other,
[03:13] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[03:18] ---
    Isumi's found some guy she
    likes?! Say it isn't so!
[03:21] ---
    Young Sir, what is the matter?
[03:24] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[03:26] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[03:29] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[03:35] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[03:40] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[03:45] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[03:51] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[03:57] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[04:02] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[04:07] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[04:13] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[04:18] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[04:21] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[04:24] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[04:29] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[04:32] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[04:35] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[04:54] ---
    His Name Is Magic Ball Pitcher Wataru!!!
[04:58] ---
    Video Rental
    V Tachibana
[05:00] ---
    Duskin today, Duskin tomorrow.
[05:04] ---
    Junki Takegami
    Gaou Rangerman
[05:08] ---
    Young Sir, I found "Ryukendo"
    mixed in on the Toei sentai shelf!
[05:12] ---
    Oh, yeah?
[05:14] ---
    I'll put it away.
[05:16] ---
    Go! Goodman
[05:16] ---
    Young Sir, that is the shelf
    for Toho's superhero SFX films.
[05:17] ---
    Toho Superhero SFX
[05:20] ---
    Right...
[05:23] ---
    More Shochiku films other than "The
    X" and "Goke, Body Snatcher"...
[05:27] ---
    Superhero SFX is a genre you know well.
    How could you make a mistake like that?
[05:30] ---
    Did something happen?
[05:31] ---
    Nah, not really.
[05:33] ---
    But when you're so blatantly depressed...
[05:38] ---
    What happened to the Young Sir?!
[05:40] ---
    As his maid, I cannot just let this go!
[05:46] ---
    A-Are you all right?
[05:48] ---
    H-Hayate...
[05:51] ---
    I was afraid he might be like that...
[05:53] ---
    The Miss was feeding his
    fears quite a bit, after all.
[05:58] ---
    So that was the reason.
[05:59] ---
    Huh? Is something wrong?
[06:01] ---
    No, it's just that he won't come
    to me for advice, and yet...
[06:05] ---
    No, it's probably because
[06:06] ---
    it's easier for him to talk
    to Miss Nagi, who is his age,
[06:09] ---
    or some other equally trivial reason.
[06:12] ---
    So, as I suspected, being older is no good.
[06:14] ---
    No, no, no, no!
[06:16] ---
    I am past 20 already, so perhaps it
    means I am past my expiration date.
[06:21] ---
    Th-That is not the issue!
[06:24] ---
    You're still at a luscious age! I
    mean, even if you were married...
[06:27] ---
    Wait. That's...!
[06:28] ---
    Young Sir!
[06:31] ---
    Is it all right to be doing this?
[06:33] ---
    Ta-da!
[06:34] ---
    No, it ain't.
[06:36] ---
    Young Sir!
[06:42] ---
    As I recall...
[06:44] ---
    Okay, pan. Keep panning.
[06:46] ---
    That uniform is...!
[06:48] ---
    Shio
[06:49] ---
    Even if what Nagi said was right...
[06:52] ---
    Darn it! Thinking about it
    isn't going to get me anywhere!
[07:04] ---
    I did not imagine such
    a turn of events, so...
[07:07] ---
    This outfit stands out, doesn't it?
[07:09] ---
    You always stand out...
[07:11] ---
    But under normal circumstances, I
    think he would've noticed us long ago.
[07:16] ---
    Next stop, Shiomi Municipal
    High School Main Gate.
[07:20] ---
    Shiomi?!
[07:21] ---
    I am burning to get off
    at the next stoooooop!!
[07:32] ---
    It has been a long time since I've
    found myself coming to this school...
[07:36] ---
    Isumi's... here...
[07:39] ---
    Damn it! You can't keep Isumi and
    me apart with something like this!
[07:43] ---
    Young Sir...
[07:44] ---
    Isumi must have been wearing their uniform.
[07:48] ---
    Why does he have to go to
    such lengths for Isumi?
[07:51] ---
    But if only I could do something
    for the Young Sir...
[07:55] ---
    Um, if you'd like, shall I tell you
    how to get inside the school grounds?
[08:01] ---
    Is it normal for butlers to
    know things like that, too?
[08:04] ---
    Uh...
[08:06] ---
    Rider Kick!
[08:09] ---
    Darn it! Why won't the gate open?!
[08:11] ---
    Since it's come to this,
    I'll do a vertical suplex...
[08:13] ---
    Young Sir.
[08:14] ---
    Wh-What are you doing here?!
[08:17] ---
    What about you?
[08:20] ---
    That's none of your business, right?
[08:22] ---
    That is part of my business.
[08:25] ---
    I have heard what is going on from Hayate.
[08:28] ---
    Did you think I could just
    leave you to your own devices?!
[08:32] ---
    Y-Yes, ma'am! Please do as you see fit!
[08:37] ---
    Now, get into the school grounds
    through the tear in this fence.
[08:40] ---
    There's no tear.
[08:41] ---
    What?!
[08:43] ---
    This cannot be! According to
    the map Hayate drew for me...
[08:46] ---
    But there isn't.
[08:48] ---
    Goodness! It has been completely repaired!
[08:51] ---
    Wow, Wataru, what are you doing here?
[08:54] ---
    Y-You...?!
[08:55] ---
    Never mind. Could you just let us in?
[08:58] ---
    Okay, sure.
[08:59] ---
    Makariku Maharita! There!
[09:02] ---
    Oh...
[09:03] ---
    I'm always barely on time,
    so don't underestimate me!
[09:06] ---
    Are you bragging?
[09:07] ---
    So, what are you doing here?
[09:09] ---
    Yeah...
[09:10] ---
    There are times when a man
    just has to get going.
[09:14] ---
    Young Sir, you can act
    cool like Captain Okita,
[09:16] ---
    but it is lame when you are
    caught on the chain link fence.
[09:18] ---
    Shut up!
[09:20] ---
    At any rate, might we ask you
    to show us around the school?
[09:23] ---
    Sure, I don't mind, but it's
    a really normal school.
[09:26] ---
    I see...
[09:27] ---
    Wait, whoa!
[09:32] ---
    Wh-Wh-What is th-th-that?
[09:34] ---
    Uh, uh, um...
[09:36] ---
    They're delinquents.
[09:37] ---
    You know, we're a normal high school,
    so we have people like that, too.
[09:41] ---
    What a good boy you are!
[09:43] ---
    Puppies are so awesome! They're
    so soothing for the soul!
[09:51] ---
    What fortune is this?!
[09:51] ---
    Shio
[09:52] ---
    What about that?
[09:53] ---
    No idea...
[09:54] ---
    You've never seen a female gang leader?
[09:55] ---
    You know, because we're a normal high school.
[09:58] ---
    No, no, you don't see those these days.
[09:59] ---
    That's so cool!
[10:03] ---
    Th-That smelled nice.
[10:05] ---
    This is the fragrance of lavender.
[10:07] ---
    You know, because we're a normal high school,
[10:09] ---
    we sometimes get a girl leaping through time.
[10:11] ---
    That's not the anime version.
[10:13] ---
    That is the Tomoyo Harada version.
[10:15] ---
    You should be able to handle the rest, right?
[10:17] ---
    I have to hurry back to the co-op,
    or they'll be sold out. Later!
[10:21] ---
    Having said that, the
    girl cheerfully ran off.
[10:26] ---
    Y-Yes.
[10:27] ---
    My heart is pounding.
[10:31] ---
    Spin, spin.
[10:32] ---
    Oh, dear, oh, dear.
[10:34] ---
    This does not seem... to be the place...
[10:38] ---
    Isumi...
[10:39] ---
    Is Isumi not here?
[10:41] ---
    Here we go!
[10:42] ---
    Y-Yes.
[10:45] ---
    This also does not seem... to be the place.
[10:59] ---
    This also does not seem... Ptewy.
[11:01] ---
    Naturally, this is not a fan service episode
[11:01] ---
    Swimming, swimming, swimming along...
[11:04] ---
    made specially for the Isumi fans.
[11:07] ---
    Isumi is searching for something here.
[11:12] ---
    Where in the world could Isumi be?
[11:15] ---
    Young Sir?
[11:17] ---
    Why are you straining like that?
[11:20] ---
    What?
[11:26] ---
    Why is Isumi dressed like that?!
[11:27] ---
    Young Sir? Whoa, whoa.
[11:29] ---
    Not only that, but at the
    end of her intent gaze is...
[11:39] ---
    Senpai
[11:41] ---
    What's with that guy with the face
    that makes you want to touch it
[11:43] ---
    and "senpai" written on his back?!
[11:46] ---
    I imagine you do not watch
    DVDs along those lines, but...
[11:50] ---
    Wha?!
[11:51] ---
    That is a standard move in youth dramas.
[11:53] ---
    The "Senpai, please wipe your
    sweat with this" attack!
[11:56] ---
    What?!
[11:59] ---
    So this is the move that's
    considered an endangered species
[12:02] ---
    in anime and TV shows,
    and even in girls' manga.
[12:04] ---
    The "Senpai, please wipe
    your sweat with this"!
[12:05] ---
    You fools!
[12:08] ---
    For you young'uns out there,
[12:09] ---
    try asking your Showa
    Era mothers and fathers.
[12:13] ---
    I may not look it, but I am
    still just a bit past 20, so...
[12:17] ---
    The white towel is an essential
    item for a girl in love.
[12:20] ---
    It is a symbol that says,
[12:22] ---
    "I will be there for your sweat
    and tears of youth, senpai."
[12:25] ---
    I am well aware of that.
[12:26] ---
    SHOCK!
[12:28] ---
    Maybe I didn't really know who Isumi was.
[12:32] ---
    That Isumi wanted that blue
    set square sort of season
[12:34] ---
    that the sun could give or withhold...
[12:36] ---
    That she was looking for
    that experience of youth...
[12:39] ---
    It's true, the ardent passion of
    youth isn't flowing in my veins.
[12:43] ---
    Flowing in me is the murky blood of an otaku!
[12:45] ---
    Will the Heavens forsake me?!
[12:50] ---
    The sun... is blinding!
[12:52] ---
    Young Sir, the sun is that way.
[12:54] ---
    Right, right.
[12:55] ---
    The sun...
[12:57] ---
    Ruru-ruru-ru ru-ta-wa. What is it in reverse?
    (Ruru-ruru-ru ru-ta-wa. Hantai kara yomu to?)
[13:02] ---
    Tonto-ton-ton, favorite part? Roasted jowl butt.
    (Toto-ton-ton, suki na bui wa? Tontoro rousu.)
[13:05] ---
    This place brings back memories.
[13:06] ---
    But I feel shy about seeing
    my old friends again.
[13:09] ---
    I need to be careful, so no one spots me.
[13:12] ---
    Hayate!
[13:13] ---
    It's only been 7 seconds and 3 frames!
[13:16] ---
    Miss Nishizawa... Looks like you found me.
[13:20] ---
    Why is Hayate here? Could it be
    that maybe he's come to see me?
[13:25] ---
    Since it's come to this, it
    might be faster just to ask her.
[13:32] ---
    Um...
[13:32] ---
    Um...
[13:34] ---
    Has anything strange happened today...
[13:34] ---
    Want some bread? It's half-eaten, but...
[13:36] ---
    What?
[13:36] ---
    What?
[13:37] ---
    No, it's nothing.
[13:40] ---
    Oh, really! What am I saying
    at a time like this?!
[13:44] ---
    Um...
[13:45] ---
    Y-Yes?
[13:46] ---
    Oh! I saw you!
[13:48] ---
    No, I mean, other than me.
[13:51] ---
    Not much else has happened.
[13:52] ---
    We're a normal high school here,
[13:54] ---
    so there aren't any celebrities
    or IT industry CEOs here.
[13:56] ---
    That's true.
[13:58] ---
    Pardon me for interrupting your meal!
[14:00] ---
    Oh, wait a minute!
[14:02] ---
    If it's like the Seven Mysteries of
    Shiomi High School, I could tell you.
[14:04] ---
    Huh?
[14:06] ---
    Ever since the manager of a certain
    club suddenly passed away,
[14:11] ---
    all kinds of strange things have
    been happening after school.
[14:19] ---
    Because of that, no one
    wants to stay after school,
[14:22] ---
    and all the managers quit.
[14:25] ---
    Everyone says it's the
    dead manager's curse now.
[14:28] ---
    I feel like those are all horror
    stories I've heard somewhere before.
[14:32] ---
    Well, it's just a rumor, though.
[14:35] ---
    Could it be...
[14:36] ---
    ...that Isumi was asked to banish
    a spirit in relation to this?
[14:42] ---
    Thank you very much!
[14:43] ---
    See you around!
[14:44] ---
    See you!
[14:48] ---
    What the heck? So Hayate
    wasn't here to see me...
[14:54] ---
    This yakisoba sandwich is making me tear up!
[15:11] ---
    Young Sir...
[15:13] ---
    It's true, I don't have impressive pecs...
[15:16] ---
    And sweat and tears aren't for me!
[15:20] ---
    Young Sir!
[15:33] ---
    So... this was the place...
[15:41] ---
    No one... Not anyone else...
[15:44] ---
    No one will be allowed to
    wipe my senpai's sweat!
[15:50] ---
    Um...
[15:51] ---
    Go ahead.
[15:53] ---
    You can use my body.
[15:55] ---
    What?
[15:56] ---
    Y-You can see me?
[15:58] ---
    Yes, you could say that.
[15:59] ---
    A hit! There's a hit!
[16:02] ---
    All that aside, what did you
    mean? Go ahead with what?
[16:05] ---
    You may use my body as a medium
    to make your wish come true.
[16:10] ---
    What? C-Can I really?
[16:14] ---
    Yes.
[16:21] ---
    So I'm a loser!
[16:21] ---
    Loser
[16:24] ---
    Young Sir!
[16:26] ---
    What?!
[16:27] ---
    I don't care anymore!
[16:29] ---
    It's just too blindingly brilliant!
[16:30] ---
    I don't have a chance in...
[16:35] ---
    You hit me! I've never
    even been hit by my dad!
[16:38] ---
    Please do not say that line!
[16:40] ---
    Because this is not a
    parody! This is your life!
[16:44] ---
    Young Sir, are you really fine with this?
[16:47] ---
    You even said it yourself earlier, remember?
[16:49] ---
    That there are times when a
    man just has to get going.
[16:52] ---
    There are times when a man
    has to face things head-on,
[16:55] ---
    no matter how great an
    obstacle stands in your way.
[17:03] ---
    I understand.
[17:05] ---
    Young Sir!
[17:05] ---
    But how am I supposed to
    face that great obstacle?
[17:09] ---
    I may not look it, but I have more
    life experience than you, so...
[17:13] ---
    Once upon a time, when it
    came to a man-to-man fight...
[17:15] ---
    Soul
[17:16] ---
    ...it was always a baseball match,
    putting heart and soul into one pitch!
[17:20] ---
    Hitting and hitting, and
    pitching and pitching!
[17:24] ---
    Truly, fair and square!
    No regrets in your youth!
[17:27] ---
    All right, I understand.
[17:30] ---
    Saki
[17:32] ---
    Thank you.
[17:37] ---
    Someday, the Young Sir may sprout wings...
[17:40] ---
    And maybe leap out of a window...
[17:42] ---
    And because I'm kind of sort of the
    Bible that teaches him about freedom,
[17:47] ---
    so it's fine. This is how it should be.
[17:50] ---
    Even she doesn't really
    know what she's saying,
[17:53] ---
    so even if there were a song that
    had similar-sounding lyrics,
[17:55] ---
    it would merely be a coincidence.
    Ah, a thesis, a thesis.
[17:58] ---
    Saki, where did Wataru go?
[18:00] ---
    The Young Sir...
[18:02] ---
    ...has gone to fight a man's battle!
[18:04] ---
    Huh?
[18:06] ---
    Senpai.
[18:13] ---
    Here you are.
[18:14] ---
    Hold it right there!
[18:18] ---
    Who are you?
[18:19] ---
    Yeah! What do you want?!
[18:21] ---
    Soul
[18:21] ---
    A baseball match!
[18:23] ---
    Putting heart and soul into
    one pitch for her white towel.
[18:25] ---
    I request that you engage me
    in an earnest duel between men.
[18:28] ---
    The winner will get his sweat wiped
    by the manager with her white towel!
[18:32] ---
    Hey, you can't just do that!
[18:33] ---
    Interesting. I accept!
[18:49] ---
    Young Sir...
[18:51] ---
    Watch me, Isumi!
[18:53] ---
    I'm going to put everything I've experienced
    in my life thus far into this one pitch!
[18:59] ---
    How dare he get all fired up on his own?
[19:12] ---
    Reach for me! My...!
[19:16] ---
    Young Sir!
[19:21] ---
    My...!
[19:34] ---
    I'm completely burnt out.
[19:41] ---
    Young Sir!
[19:42] ---
    Saki, I've been defeated...
    and I have no regrets.
[19:47] ---
    Yes, sir.
[19:48] ---
    I worked up a good sweat.
[19:50] ---
    Here you are.
[19:53] ---
    Thank you.
[19:59] ---
    Now, you have no more
    regrets holding you back.
[20:07] ---
    Isumi!
[20:09] ---
    That must have been tough for you.
[20:11] ---
    A job well done.
[20:13] ---
    I will escort you back to your residence.
[20:15] ---
    I-I appreciate it, but...
[20:21] ---
    I-Isumi, I... I mean, I myself...
[20:26] ---
    Wataru, you helped me, didn't you?
[20:31] ---
    Thank you for letting him
    work up a good sweat.
[20:37] ---
    I guess...
[20:39] ---
    ...Isumi appreciated what I did.
[20:42] ---
    I don't quite understand,
[20:43] ---
    but it seems to have gone well.
[20:50] ---
    So in the end, it looks like I
    was making a fuss over nothing...
[20:54] ---
    Lame, huh?
[20:57] ---
    You were a fine young man today, Young Sir.
[21:00] ---
    What? Really?
[21:01] ---
    Yes. You were cooler than
    I have ever seen you.
[21:06] ---
    I see.
[21:09] ---
    Let's go home.
[21:11] ---
    We left the shop unattended.
[21:15] ---
    Yes, Young Sir.
[21:20] ---
    What the heck?
[21:21] ---
    So Isumi was just working
    part-time as a manager?
[21:24] ---
    Yes, apparently so.
[21:26] ---
    After all, I can't tell her
    that Isumi was working...
[21:30] ---
    ...to banish the spirit of a dead manager.
[21:31] ---
    They say that reality is
    stranger than fiction,
[21:34] ---
    but nothing that strange ever happens.
[21:37] ---
    True.
[21:38] ---
    This doesn't leave anything
    for Tamori to comment on.
[21:41] ---
    Indeed, I agree, Miss Nagi.
[21:44] ---
    No, no, what happened was
    actually plenty strange.
[21:48] ---
    Next time, it looks like a rival
    will be appearing for Hayate.
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:17] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:26] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:43] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:53] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
SIGN    Student Council Girl Trio
SIGN    Lettering by Masumi Asano
[23:26] ---
    The student council girl
    trio's Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    Morning, it's Izumi Segawa.
[23:31] ---
    I'm Risa Asakaze.
[23:32] ---
    Explosion! I'm Miki Hanabishi.
[23:34] ---
    Today will be the last of the
    Student Council Girl Trio specials.
[23:36] ---
    These 3 weeks have flown by.
[23:38] ---
    But no matter how many times I listen to
    this song, I still think it's a masterpiece.
[23:40] ---
    Yes, a masterpiece!
[23:40] ---
    It could even be featured on
    that New Year's music show!
[23:42] ---
    It might even be as good
    as our national anthem!
[23:43] ---
    No, it should be turned
    into the show's theme song!
[23:46] ---
    Okay, time for the fan service shot.
[23:47] ---
    Actually, if you paste the 3 fan service
    shots together, you get one single picture.
[23:51] ---
    That's amazing!
[23:51] ---
    Which means we have no choice but to
    use it to create original merchandise!
[23:54] ---
    Adios, amigo!
SIGN    Preview
[23:57] ---
    Hayate, you don't have to work anymore.
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:59] ---
    Is that to say that you're firing me?
[24:01] ---
    No, no, that's not it.
[24:03] ---
    It means you can take a break
    from your butler duties
[24:04] ---
    and focus on your studies
    until exams are over.
[24:07] ---
    I made arrangements just
    for such an occasion!
[24:10] ---
    For a new, temporary butler!
[24:12] ---
    A pleasure to meet you.
    I am Mecha Butler No. 13.
[24:14] ---
    Next time, "Sure, Amuro May Have
    Had a Place to Return to, But..."
[24:17] ---
    I am superior to him, you know.
[24:19] ---
    Sure, Amuro May Have
    Had a Place to Return to, But..."
[24:19] ---
    Change! Switch on, one, two, three, with
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" next time!
[24:24] ---
    

47 - Sure, Amuro May Have Had a Place to Return to, But...

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:16] ---
    The government will be
    addressing the nation shortly
[00:19] ---
    to make an important announcement.
[00:20] ---
    Please leave your TV on and stand
    by without changing the channel.
[00:23] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[00:25] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[00:30] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[00:34] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[00:37] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[00:39] ---
    and both have a bit of the
    wrong idea about each other,
[00:41] ---
    but they share the immensely strong, loving
    bond between servant and mistress.
[00:46] ---
    Wait! And you just start the opening
    like there's nothing going on?
[00:49] ---
    I mean, what's this important announcement?!
[00:52] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[00:55] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[00:57] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[01:03] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[01:08] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[01:14] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[01:19] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[01:25] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[01:30] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[01:35] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[01:41] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[01:47] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[01:49] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[01:52] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[01:57] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[02:00] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[02:03] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[02:21] ---
    Sure, Amuro May Have Had a
    Place to Return to, But...
[02:26] ---
    What? M-Miss...
[02:29] ---
    I have chosen my words carefully, Persian.
[02:32] ---
    What did you just say, Miss?
[02:34] ---
    But you did not.
[02:35] ---
    I told you, you don't have to work anymore.
[02:35] ---
    This is Sparta's answer!
[02:38] ---
    This is blasphemy! Madness!
[02:44] ---
    Hey, now, what are you looking so down for?
[02:46] ---
    Is that to say that you're firing me?
[02:49] ---
    Huh? No, no, that's not it.
[02:51] ---
    You barely managed to pass that
    test the other day, right?
[02:54] ---
    What?
[02:55] ---
    If you fail the upcoming finals,
    you'll seriously be on thin ice,
[02:59] ---
    so I'm saying you can take a
    break from your butler duties
[03:02] ---
    and focus on your studies
    until the exams are over.
[03:04] ---
    Wh-What are you saying, Miss?!
[03:07] ---
    I-I can handle that much!
[03:09] ---
    You needn't show such concern.
[03:12] ---
    Then shall we say that you'll get
    fired if your grades are bad?
[03:15] ---
    Well?
[03:18] ---
    Why not graciously accept her offer?
[03:22] ---
    Maria...
[03:23] ---
    It is a great kindness that your
    mistress is showing you, after all.
[03:26] ---
    Right?
[03:26] ---
    Well, just study hard without
    straining yourself.
[03:29] ---
    Right...
[03:29] ---
    But in exchange!
[03:31] ---
    I expect you to play hard with
    me once the tests are over,
[03:33] ---
    so brace yourself. Got it?
[03:36] ---
    Y-Yes, I understand.
[03:43] ---
    Yo! What's with the long face?
[03:46] ---
    I don't know why I got smacked...
[03:48] ---
    I do feel a bit apprehensive, though.
[03:51] ---
    Mr. Klaus is currently out
    and absent as well...
[03:54] ---
    No, no, what are you saying, Maria?
[03:56] ---
    I'm not a child, you know.
[03:58] ---
    I don't need a butler in
    constant attendance...
[04:00] ---
    So you say, but who's the one who
    got into a desperate situation,
[04:03] ---
    only to be barely saved when
    you had no butler with you?
[04:07] ---
    That was a coincidence! A coincidence!
[04:09] ---
    In preparation for just such an event...
[04:11] ---
    What gives, Klaus? That was a
    waste of a perfectly good TV.
[04:15] ---
    P-Please...
[04:17] ---
    In preparation for just such a
    situation, I made some arrangements.
[04:20] ---
    Arrangements?
[04:20] ---
    Yes, a new temporary butler.
[04:24] ---
    Um, are you certain you're
    fine with keeping me company?
[04:29] ---
    Don't ya sweat it!
[04:30] ---
    Yer workin' hard for Nagi, right?
[04:32] ---
    Then it's my duty as the
    partner to help ya out, too.
[04:39] ---
    Yer not makin' any progress here!
    What're ya spacin' out for?!
[04:43] ---
    Is it really all right for me to
    be taking time off work to study?
[04:47] ---
    As for that, looks like ya
    got nothin' to worry 'bout.
[04:49] ---
    I heard somethin' 'bout a new butler comin'.
[04:52] ---
    A new... butler?
[04:54] ---
    Yeah, I overheard the SP guys
    sayin' somethin' like that.
[04:59] ---
    I had no idea! I see! I
    see! That's news to me!
[05:02] ---
    What the heck? Does that upset ya?
[05:04] ---
    I-I'm not letting it upset me or anything.
[05:07] ---
    Well, she really hates strangers,
[05:09] ---
    so I imagine anyone who isn't me
    will have a hard time with her.
[05:12] ---
    But while yer sittin' here,
[05:13] ---
    Nagi and the new butler might
    become friendly and...
[05:17] ---
    I see nothing wrong with
    them becoming friendly.
[05:19] ---
    Never mind that. It's time to study!
SIGN    Newest Edition Basic Problem Collection Comprehensive English
[05:22] ---
    I have to live up to the faith
    the Miss has placed in me!
[05:24] ---
    Um, "atarashii shitsuji"... "New butler".
[05:28] ---
    "A new butler come soon"...
[05:31] ---
    "Coming soon dead"...
[05:33] ---
    C'mon now, don't slip in ominous
    soundin' phrases into yer English.
[05:37] ---
    If it bothers ya that much,
[05:39] ---
    why don't ya peek in on 'em on yer
    way to the bathroom or somethin'?
[05:41] ---
    What?
[05:42] ---
    But I don't see the need
    to get so upset 'bout it.
[05:45] ---
    Even Himegami told ya, right?
[05:47] ---
    That he's countin' on ya
    to take care of Nagi?
[05:52] ---
    Have confidence. Yer the only
    butler that suits Nagi.
[05:56] ---
    Don't ya think ya could put more
    faith in the bond ya have with her?
[06:00] ---
    My bond with the Miss...
[06:03] ---
    You're right.
[06:05] ---
    Pardon me for losing my composure.
[06:07] ---
    Don't sweat it. C'mon, let's
    get focused, shall we?
[06:10] ---
    Yes, ma'am!
[06:11] ---
    But first...
[06:13] ---
    I think I'll go to the bathroom
[06:15] ---
    and pull myself together
    before I resume my studies.
[06:17] ---
    Bathroom first!
[06:21] ---
    *So in the end, he's still upset. *
[06:25] ---
    No, no, no! Like hell I need a new butler!
[06:29] ---
    I will never accept another
    butler, who is not Hayate!
[06:33] ---
    B-But this butler is extremely capable
[06:35] ---
    and I believe there is no doubt that
    he will be of more use than Ayasaki...
[06:39] ---
    None of that matters!
[06:40] ---
    I don't even want to breathe the same
    air as a butler that's not Hayate!
[06:44] ---
    Besides, I'm...
[06:45] ---
    Not to worry.
[06:47] ---
    You are certain to come
    to like me, Miss Nagi.
[06:50] ---
    Y-You're...!
[06:51] ---
    A pleasure to meet you. I
    am Mecha Butler No. 13.
[06:56] ---
    All right, then. Send him
    back to Miss Makimura.
[07:00] ---
    Oh?
[07:01] ---
    Uh, um, Miss Nagi?
[07:04] ---
    Oh, so this is basically what
    they were referring to.
[07:07] ---
    What the heck? This is borin'.
[07:09] ---
    In that case, I can relax and
    devote myself to my studies.
[07:12] ---
    Yup.
[07:13] ---
    Study hard now.
[07:15] ---
    I will!
[07:15] ---
    *But this was where Hayate's
    guard was not up! *
[07:19] ---
    Thank you very much.
[07:21] ---
    Oh, no, you are welcome.
[07:25] ---
    I mean...
[07:26] ---
    Responding in some way is the
    polite thing to do, right?
[07:30] ---
    Or actually...
[07:31] ---
    Does its words actually count
    as an expression of gratitude?
[07:36] ---
    This is...
[07:37] ---
    Could it be a manga drawn by you, Miss Nagi?
[07:41] ---
    Whoa! Where do you get off looking
    at it without my permission?!
[07:43] ---
    Get your butt out of her already, you jerk!
[07:45] ---
    What a lousy manga it is!
[07:48] ---
    Wh-What did you say?!
[07:50] ---
    As if a robot like you could understand
    the greatness of my manga!
[07:52] ---
    But the characters do have impact.
[07:55] ---
    Huh?
[07:56] ---
    The layout and dialogue also have
    a certain sensibility to them.
[08:00] ---
    The art isn't bad, either.
[08:02] ---
    But the plot developments are abrupt,
    which overshadow the good parts.
[08:06] ---
    You have to think about your reader more.
[08:08] ---
    Oh, is that right?
[08:09] ---
    Yes. You are smart, so your level of
    comprehension is higher than average.
[08:14] ---
    But your readers will be seeing it for
    the first time, so that won't work.
[08:17] ---
    Have you read that manga?
[08:19] ---
    No, I can't reach it, so I haven't read it.
[08:22] ---
    Then please read it, because it
    will serve as a good reference.
[08:24] ---
    It is an extremely fine piece of work.
[08:26] ---
    I-Is that so?
[08:28] ---
    Here you are.
[08:29] ---
    Then I'll try reading it a bit.
[08:31] ---
    Huh?
[08:32] ---
    This is rose tea.
[08:34] ---
    It will soothe you and allow
    you to read at your leisure.
[08:37] ---
    When did you have time to...?
[08:39] ---
    I'm a Mecha Butler, after all.
[08:41] ---
    I know the path of Heaven
[08:42] ---
    and by overclocking, I can move
    more swiftly than human beings.
[08:45] ---
    I see!
[08:47] ---
    H-He's amazing...
[08:50] ---
    Well, then, Miss Maria, I would like
    to help with the cleaning and such...
[08:54] ---
    Huh? O-Oh, yes...
[08:57] ---
    Then let us start over here.
[09:05] ---
    Wh-What are you...?!
[09:07] ---
    Pardon me.
[09:08] ---
    But please don't move. It seems
    your shoulders are a bit stiff.
[09:12] ---
    What?
[09:13] ---
    Now, relax.
[09:15] ---
    Uh, a-all right.
[09:17] ---
    You may be capable of doing
    everything on your own,
[09:19] ---
    but working too hard can be a problem, too.
[09:22] ---
    D-Do you think so?
[09:25] ---
    *But he's really good at this. *
[09:28] ---
    *I think I might kind of like it... *
[09:33] ---
    Thank you, No. 13.
[09:35] ---
    Oh, no, it's the least I can do.
[09:37] ---
    If you'll just instruct me, I'll
    do the rest of the work for you.
[09:41] ---
    What? B-But...
[09:43] ---
    It's the foolish desire of a guy to
    act cool in front of a cute girl,
[09:48] ---
    so please, let me act cool.
[09:51] ---
    Not doing any butler work at all
    makes me feel restless somehow.
[09:55] ---
    Come to think of it, I wonder
    if that robot butler's left.
[09:58] ---
    Ooh, you're quite good!
[10:01] ---
    All right, I'm going to win the next round!
[10:03] ---
    It will not go so easily.
[10:06] ---
    *Wh-What in the world is this? *
[10:09] ---
    *Somehow...
[10:11] ---
    ...he's completely fitting in now. *
[10:14] ---
    *Long ago, there was an episode of "Doraemon" *
[10:16] ---
    *where a guy's shadow took the guy's place. *
[10:19] ---
    Don't say something so ominous!
[10:25] ---
    S-S-S-Small Light.
    (Su-Su-Su-Sumouru raito.)
[10:28] ---
    M-M-M-M-M-My existence has finally become...
    (To-To-To-To-To-Toutou boku no sonzai ga...)
[10:51] ---
    What? Hayate's getting jealous?
[10:54] ---
    Yeah, it looks like the way you've
    become friendly with that robot
[10:57] ---
    is really gettin' to him.
[10:59] ---
    Oh, my...
[11:00] ---
    But a butler robot, huh?
[11:02] ---
    The technology of the Sanzenin
    family sure is impressive.
[11:04] ---
    I am honored to receive
    your words of praise.
[11:06] ---
    So, how outstandin' are ya?
[11:08] ---
    Someone, tell her!
[11:11] ---
    I'm askin' ya, ya moron!
[11:16] ---
    I made a jab at him without even meanin' to!
[11:18] ---
    Your reputation precedes you, Miss Sakuya.
[11:22] ---
    You do not overlook even
    the smallest of jokes.
[11:25] ---
    Ya...
[11:26] ---
    Ya mean, that was on purpose?!
[11:28] ---
    Outstandin'! This Robot Butler's
    so outstandin', it's mind-blowin'!
[11:31] ---
    Hayate's getting jealous over me?
[11:34] ---
    Jealous, huh?
[11:35] ---
    Oh, man, he's so cute!
[11:43] ---
    Um, Miss, why do you look so happy?
[11:47] ---
    Because, to think Hayate
    would get jealous...
[11:49] ---
    It's a bit endearing, don't you think?
[11:51] ---
    There ya go with yer warped
    sensibilities again.
[11:54] ---
    Endearing?
[11:55] ---
    Is that an emotion that is
    enjoyable for human beings?
[11:58] ---
    What? Are there things even
    you don't understand, No. 13?
[12:02] ---
    Yes, because my CPU hasn't been
    programmed with thought patterns
[12:06] ---
    that encourage negative
    emotions in human beings.
[12:09] ---
    I think it's fine that you're
    not programmed with them.
[12:18] ---
    This is correct, too.
[12:20] ---
    All right! I got everything right!
[12:24] ---
    *Somehow, being a bit depressed
    actually makes me more focused. *
[12:29] ---
    *Human beings are strange creatures. *
[12:34] ---
    There's definitely a gloom
    about him from behind.
[12:37] ---
    So that's what jealousy
    looks like. I see, I see.
[12:40] ---
    Quit grinnin' like a fool and
    go on in to comfort him.
[12:43] ---
    Yes, he should be getting
    tired from his studies soon,
[12:46] ---
    so maybe I'll make him
    some tea or something.
[12:48] ---
    Please wait, Miss.
[12:49] ---
    What is it, No. 13?
[12:51] ---
    If you go to comfort him right away,
    you'll be playing right into his hands.
[12:55] ---
    What?
[12:56] ---
    I get it. The adult gambit.
[12:58] ---
    Yes, so this is where...
[13:02] ---
    Yes?
[13:03] ---
    Um, H-Hayate?
[13:06] ---
    I made some tea...
[13:08] ---
    Oh, Maria?
[13:09] ---
    I appreciate you going to the
    trouble of making me tea...
[13:12] ---
    Oh, no, please think nothing of it, meow.
[13:18] ---
    A-Are your studies going well, meow?
[13:20] ---
    Right...
[13:22] ---
    *Honestly! What about this
    is a good idea, No. 13?! *
[13:27] ---
    What is Hayate doing?!
[13:29] ---
    Staring all goggly at Maria like that!
[13:31] ---
    Nah, that's not bein' all goggly.
[13:44] ---
    No!
[13:45] ---
    I-I will be taking some time off, meow!
[13:53] ---
    Damn you, Hayate! How dare you look
    at Maria with those pervy eyes?!
[13:56] ---
    Now, now, Miss.
[13:58] ---
    I am sorry, but it seems
    this plan has failed.
[14:03] ---
    *And with that, I've gotten rid of person #1. *
[14:06] ---
    Let us take this in a slightly
    different direction.
[14:08] ---
    I get it! A late night snack!
[14:10] ---
    It's not night yet, though.
[14:12] ---
    Then I'll pull out all the stops to...
[14:14] ---
    Denied.
[14:15] ---
    What?! Why?!
[14:17] ---
    I'm trying to make a loving dish here!
[14:20] ---
    That's why!
[14:21] ---
    It's obviously leadin' to the totally
    cliche explosion punch line!
[14:23] ---
    Don't mock me!
[14:25] ---
    Ya can't even fix up a single
    servin' of cup ramen properly!
[14:27] ---
    What did you say?!
[14:29] ---
    If you would not mind, would you
    lend a hand as well, Miss Sakuya?
[14:33] ---
    Me?
[14:36] ---
    Wow, this is incredible!
[14:37] ---
    You made all of this for me?
[14:40] ---
    Yup. Eat up and work hard.
[14:42] ---
    I had no idea you were a good cook.
[14:44] ---
    Nah, this stuff is nothin' extraordinary.
[14:46] ---
    What's he doing, being encouraged by Saku?!
[14:49] ---
    So that person named Hayate is
    quite close to Miss Sakuya.
[14:53] ---
    D-Don't be ridiculous!
[14:56] ---
    Hayate is... Hayate is my...
[14:58] ---
    Goodness, this food is so comforting.
[15:00] ---
    Don't be getting comforted!
[15:03] ---
    I swear! Hayate, I swear!
[15:05] ---
    M-Miss, what are you so angry about?
[15:09] ---
    She seems to be in a foul mood, so
    perhaps you should take your leave.
[15:14] ---
    What the heck? She's such a child.
[15:17] ---
    Miss Sakuya, you are more
    mature than Miss Nagi.
[15:23] ---
    Ya sure are a smooth talker.
[15:25] ---
    Well, I'll be goin' then.
[15:28] ---
    *Now, that makes two. *
[15:30] ---
    *That just leaves... *
[15:32] ---
    So anyway, are you getting
    anywhere with your studies?
[15:34] ---
    Yes, well, more or less.
[15:37] ---
    Oh, you've gotten quite a bit done.
[15:39] ---
    Yes, and I owe it to Sakuya for
    really drumming it into me.
[15:46] ---
    What about owing to me?
[15:48] ---
    So you owe it more to Saku than to me?
[15:52] ---
    What?
[15:52] ---
    Oh, no, Miss, th-that is not true!
[15:57] ---
    Hayate, you jerk!
[16:03] ---
    Miss...
[16:06] ---
    I swear! I swear, Hayate is just so...!
[16:08] ---
    Good grief.
[16:10] ---
    No. 13...
[16:10] ---
    It seems he is quite a poor butler.
[16:14] ---
    Huh?
[16:15] ---
    N-No, that's not true...
[16:18] ---
    And he seems to be awfully stupid.
[16:20] ---
    At this rate, wouldn't he be considered
    a failure as a Sanzenin butler?
[16:25] ---
    No. 13, what are you saying?
[16:28] ---
    That being the case, don't you think
    I should just remain your butler?
[16:32] ---
    What?!
[16:34] ---
    H-Hey, you!
[16:36] ---
    Let us forget about someone like him.
[16:38] ---
    I am superior to him, you know.
[16:39] ---
    But...!
[16:40] ---
    How pitiful. Getting so depressed
    over something like this.
[16:44] ---
    Hayate...
[16:46] ---
    It's true. When I think of what
    would be good for you, Miss...
[16:48] ---
    Hayate, that's not...!
[16:50] ---
    Even with me by your side, your picky
    eating habits never get any better,
[16:54] ---
    you keep watching TV late into the night,
[16:56] ---
    you skip school and play
    nothing but online games,
[16:58] ---
    and lately, you've gained
    an interest in Otome Road
[17:01] ---
    and you've been secretly sending
    SP members shopping there...
[17:04] ---
    Also, behind the shelf...
[17:05] ---
    That's enough! That's enough already!
[17:12] ---
    Miss?
[17:14] ---
    You and only you are my butler!
[17:17] ---
    You being a bit less than outstanding
    is a better fit for me!
[17:21] ---
    Miss...
[17:22] ---
    Hayate.
[17:23] ---
    Miss, does that count as a compliment?
[17:26] ---
    Uh, w-well, um...
[17:35] ---
    Hayate.
[17:36] ---
    Yes?
[17:37] ---
    Anyway, right now, just study hard!
[17:40] ---
    Yes, you are right!
[17:43] ---
    *Could it be that he behaved
    like that for my sake? *
[17:51] ---
    Being a bit less than
    outstanding is better...
[17:55] ---
    Human beings are so complicated.
[17:57] ---
    Eight! Stop, please!
[17:59] ---
    Let go of me, honey!
[18:01] ---
    If I'm going to lose you to him, I'd
    rather wreck him and go down with him...
[18:04] ---
    I'll go down with him!
[18:06] ---
    Eight!
[18:07] ---
    Take that!
[18:11] ---
    Oh, Eight, you dummy!
[18:17] ---
    Honey...
[18:18] ---
    Were you hurt at all, No. 13?
[18:21] ---
    Why was he angry?
[18:23] ---
    I had done no harm.
[18:26] ---
    I'm sorry. I kept focusing
    all my attention on you,
[18:29] ---
    so it looks like he got jealous.
[18:31] ---
    Jealous? I do not understand.
[18:33] ---
    That emotion has not been
    programmed into me yet.
[18:36] ---
    It's fine, it's fine. I don't
    really understand it, either.
[18:39] ---
    This one isn't as high-performance
    as you, so...
[18:43] ---
    Oof.
[18:47] ---
    I still don't understand, no matter
    how high-performance I am.
[18:52] ---
    My being at this residence
[18:54] ---
    ultimately serves as a hindrance
    to Miss Nagi's happiness.
[18:59] ---
    I will leave the rest to
    Hayate and I will just...
[19:07] ---
    Breaking news!
[19:09] ---
    What is it?! What is it?! What's going on?!
[19:10] ---
    A giant meteor that has suddenly
    come flying out of space
[19:13] ---
    is currently approaching Earth!
[19:15] ---
    It appears it will land in Tokyo's
    Nerima Ward in just a few minutes!
[19:17] ---
    What?!
[19:22] ---
    Wait, it's already right in front of us!
[19:25] ---
    What a huge turn of events!
[19:26] ---
    Or actually, so the scene before
    the opening really had meaning!
[19:30] ---
    At this rate, it's gonna hit us head-on!
[19:31] ---
    Let us hurry and get out of here!
[19:33] ---
    No, at that size, you will
    not be able to flee in time.
[19:36] ---
    What?!
[19:37] ---
    Then what are we going to do?!
[19:39] ---
    Hayate, please take care of
    the Miss and the others.
[19:46] ---
    D-Don't tell me...
[19:48] ---
    I will destroy the meteor in space,
    before it damages the Earth's surface.
[19:52] ---
    If I use the self-destruct
    mechanism built into me,
[19:55] ---
    it should be possible.
[19:57] ---
    Yer gonna self-destruct?!
[19:58] ---
    D-Don't do this!
[19:59] ---
    You can't go! No. 13, this is
    an order from your mistress!
[20:03] ---
    Miss, it is a butler's duty
    to protect his mistress,
[20:06] ---
    even if it costs him his life.
[20:08] ---
    Please forgive me for disobeying your order.
[20:11] ---
    No! No! I'm never letting you go!
[20:13] ---
    If you go, I won't forgive you!
[20:22] ---
    No, No. 13!
[20:25] ---
    Hayate, please get the Miss.
[20:30] ---
    Come, Miss, get away from there!
[20:32] ---
    Let go! Let me go!
[20:36] ---
    If I am ever given the opportunity
    to be reborn again,
[20:39] ---
    I will be sure to have the emotion of
    jealousy programmed into me next time.
[20:43] ---
    I wish you happiness.
[20:47] ---
    No. 13...
[20:49] ---
    Farewell, everyone.
[20:52] ---
    No. 13!
[20:55] ---
    Farewell, Miss Nagi.
[21:15] ---
    He sure was a good guy.
[21:17] ---
    No. 13...
[21:21] ---
    Miss...
[21:26] ---
    *No. 13... *
[21:28] ---
    The giant meteor that came
    flying out of space yesterday
[21:31] ---
    somehow vanished just before
    it collided with Earth.
[21:35] ---
    *Thanks to the Mecha Butler
    No. 13's courageous deed, *
[21:38] ---
    *peace on Earth and the happiness of
    the Sanzenin Miss were protected. *
[21:43] ---
    *Thank you, No. 13. *
[21:45] ---
    *Farewell, Mecha Butler No. 13. *
[21:57] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:06] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:10] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:16] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:25] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:42] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:52] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:56] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:25] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:26] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:28] ---
    Burn, marble soul! I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:30] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:32] ---
    Ooh, this is your character song, Hayate.
[23:34] ---
    The deluge of "Hayate the Combat
    Butler" character songs
[23:37] ---
    has tapered off, so they decided
    they could play my song again.
[23:39] ---
    Are you sure the next song
    just didn't get done in time?
[23:41] ---
    That's not true. Though, it's true
    that it hasn't been sung yet.
[23:43] ---
    Well, so anyway, we're prepared
    a fan service shot of Hayate.
[23:45] ---
    Cross-dressing Hayate is nice, too,
[23:46] ---
    but for all the Hayate
    fans across the nation,
[23:48] ---
    this time, we have a pinup of
    Hayate in his butler uniform.
[23:50] ---
    When did you get a picture
    of me like this, Miss?!
[23:52] ---
    But this is better than the cross-dressing.
[23:53] ---
    Bye-bye!
SIGN    Preview
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:58] ---
    Th-This is...
[23:59] ---
    A letter that's not signed by the sender?
[24:01] ---
    Someone's got quite a lot of
    nerve to send me a love letter.
[24:05] ---
    But who in the world could it be?
[24:06] ---
    Could it be...?
[24:07] ---
    Hinagiku.
[24:08] ---
    Hayate?
[24:09] ---
    So is this letter from you, after all?
[24:11] ---
    Next time, "Hina Love".
[24:13] ---
    Episode 48 is a must-see
    episode for Hinagiku fans.
[24:16] ---
    Though, I won't be appearing in it much.
[24:17] ---
    Come Izen-cross with "Hayate the
    Combat Butler" again next time!
[24:18] ---
    Hina Love
[24:23] ---
    

48 - Hina Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:15] ---
    Boyfriend?!
[00:17] ---
    M-Mom, why are you suddenly
    bringing this up?!
[00:20] ---
    You scared me!
[00:21] ---
    I mean, you're getting to that
    age already, right, Hina?
[00:25] ---
    I thought maybe you'd want to spend you
    birthday with someone that's special to you.
[00:29] ---
    That's got nothing to do with anything!
[00:31] ---
    Or rather, I don't have anyone like that!
[00:34] ---
    Oh, you don't?
[00:35] ---
    Besides, it's always been the rule that
    we spend birthdays with just the family.
[00:44] ---
    I guess it's already been
    10 years since then.
[00:45] ---
    Hey, w-wait, what are you...?
[00:47] ---
    You were so little and now you've
    grown into a fine young lady...
[00:51] ---
    Time certainly flies.
[00:52] ---
    Q-Quit it! You're embarrassing me!
[00:55] ---
    There's no way the boys would leave
    a wonderful girl like you alone.
[01:09] ---
    There's bound to be a wonderful
    guy out there somewhere,
[01:13] ---
    who'll come flying to you if
    you'd just call out to him.
[01:20] ---
    Someone who would come if I
    would just call out to him...
[01:28] ---
    Why does Hayate enter into the picture?!
[01:31] ---
    Sure, I think he's a nice guy
    and it's not like I hate him,
[01:34] ---
    but that doesn't mean he's
    special to me or anything!
[01:42] ---
    Do you know, ladies and gentlemen?
[01:44] ---
    That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo?
[01:49] ---
    The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And...
[01:53] ---
    Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki.
[01:56] ---
    They are both a bit clueless
[01:58] ---
    and both have a bit of the
    wrong idea about each other,
[02:00] ---
    but they share the immensely strong,
    loving bond between servant and mistress.
[02:06] ---
    It's not true!
[02:07] ---
    It's totally not like that!
[02:11] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:14] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:16] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:22] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[02:27] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[02:32] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[02:38] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[02:44] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[02:49] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[02:54] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[03:00] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[03:05] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[03:08] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[03:11] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[03:16] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[03:19] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[03:22] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[03:40] ---
    Hina Love
[03:53] ---
    Good morning, Hinagiku.
[03:57] ---
    M-M-Morning!
[04:01] ---
    Hinagiku?
[04:03] ---
    What's gotten into her?
[04:07] ---
    Could it be that I did something
    to make her hate me again?!
[04:11] ---
    Hey, get a grip.
[04:13] ---
    What's the point of getting
    depressed even before the exams?
[04:15] ---
    Oh, now that you mention it, today
    is the day of our finals, isn't it?
[04:19] ---
    Huh? Then what were you getting
    depressed about just now?
[04:22] ---
    N-No, it was nothing!
[04:29] ---
    Sheesh. I got weirdly self-conscious
    because of what Mom said yesterday.
[04:36] ---
    Miss Hinagiku Katsura
[04:37] ---
    Th-This is...!
[04:40] ---
    No name on the back.
[04:44] ---
    Who in the world could it be?
[04:46] ---
    Someone's got quite a lot of
    nerve to send me a love letter.
[04:51] ---
    C-Could it be Hayate?
[04:53] ---
    No, impossible!
[04:55] ---
    But he did try to talk to me earlier...
[04:59] ---
    I-I wonder what it says...
SIGN    I will be waiting in front of the kendo training hall after school. Please come for sure.
[05:09] ---
    "I will be waiting in front of the
    kendo training hall after school.
[05:12] ---
    "Please come for sure."
[05:13] ---
    What are you doing, Hayate?
[05:14] ---
    Eeeep
[05:15] ---
    I-It's nothing! Nothing at all!
[05:22] ---
    The kendo training hall...
[05:24] ---
    Could that mean the sender is Hinagiku?
[05:26] ---
    No, no, calm down, Hayate.
[05:28] ---
    There's no way such a straight up YA event
[05:30] ---
    would ever happen in real life!
[05:32] ---
    Besides, have there even
    been any events so far
[05:34] ---
    that might have elevated my
    relationship with Hinagiku?
[05:36] ---
    Wait, maybe her strange behavior this
    morning was the prelude to this.
[05:42] ---
    H-Here you are, Miss!
[05:43] ---
    Thanks.
[05:45] ---
    No, no. If I fail like this, I'm
    not going to get another chance.
[05:48] ---
    I have to focus!
[05:50] ---
    And thus, the hours of the final exams
    were spent on agonizing distress
[05:55] ---
    and wild dating game fantasies.
[05:58] ---
    And after school let out...
[05:59] ---
    What?! That's wrong, too?!
[06:02] ---
    Honestly! And after I taught
    it to you over and over, too.
[06:06] ---
    Just what kind of a blockhead are you?
[06:08] ---
    Oh, crap. What should I do?
[06:10] ---
    Nagi, should we not check answers
    for my dear Hayate as well?
[06:14] ---
    No problem there! Hayate's a guy who
    can do it when he puts his mind to it.
[06:17] ---
    Right, Hayate?
[06:18] ---
    Y-Yes, of course, Miss!
[06:20] ---
    But I actually couldn't focus
    much because of this thing.
[06:25] ---
    I guess for starters, we'll
    do an intensive study group
[06:27] ---
    for the guy who can't do it even
    when he puts his mind to it.
[06:29] ---
    Who can't do it even when
    he puts his mind to it?!
[06:31] ---
    Like hell I'm coming over to your place!
[06:33] ---
    Aww, and here, I was thinking
    of doing it at Isumi's place.
[06:37] ---
    What?!
[06:37] ---
    A-At Isumi's place?
[06:40] ---
    That would be fine with
    me. Let us study together.
[06:43] ---
    I-If you say so, Isumi. I won't
    mind keeping you company.
[06:47] ---
    So, sorry, but you go on
    home without me, Hayate.
[06:50] ---
    Right...
[06:54] ---
    I have some free time now...
[06:59] ---
    I guess I'll at least go check it out.
[07:02] ---
    Kendo Training Hall
[07:04] ---
    Having said that, surely it's not going to
    turn out that Hinagiku's really waiting there...
[07:21] ---
    Uh, was there a "Tree of Legend"-ish thing
[07:23] ---
    in front of the kendo training hall?
[07:25] ---
    Or why are there cherry blossom petals
    in the air when it's only March?
[07:27] ---
    Or like, that's not a cherry
    blossom tree to begin with...
[07:33] ---
    I'm going to ignore all those
    jabs that don't matter and...
[07:35] ---
    H-Hinagiku...
[07:38] ---
    H-Hayate!
[07:40] ---
    Hinagiku, what are you doing here?
[07:42] ---
    Wh-What am I doing?
[07:44] ---
    I'm just here for the kendo. Obviously!
[07:47] ---
    What are you doing here, Hayate?
[07:49] ---
    Uh, um, could it be...
[07:52] ---
    Could it be...
[07:54] ---
    ...that this letter is from you, after all?
[07:57] ---
    Huh?
[07:58] ---
    I've been waiting for you, Ayasaki!
[08:02] ---
    Oh, you're Mystery Kendo Team Member A!
[08:08] ---
    Who are you calling Kendo Team Member A?!
[08:10] ---
    Don't treat me like I'm a nameless character!
[08:11] ---
    What are you doing here, Azumamiya?
[08:14] ---
    Miss Katsura, today, I will surely defeat
    my foe, Ayasaki, right before your very eyes
[08:18] ---
    and show you what I am truly capable of!
[08:21] ---
    Then could it be that *you
    *Nwrote this letter, Azumamiya?
[08:26] ---
    So that was the punch line...
[08:28] ---
    What's wrong, Ayasaki?
[08:29] ---
    Yielding already, now that you've
    found out that I'm your opponent?
[08:32] ---
    So what is up with this
    adorable letter of challenge?!
[08:35] ---
    I mean, a letter of challenge
    with a heart mark?!
[08:37] ---
    What kind of cannon fodder
    character are you?!
[08:39] ---
    Don't call me a cannon fodder
    character! My name is...
[08:42] ---
    I know.
[08:44] ---
    You coolly declared me
    your rival in Episode 15,
[08:46] ---
    you were lamely defeated instantly
    by Hinagiku in Episode 16,
[08:48] ---
    and since then, you have been
    granted almost no scenes
[08:50] ---
    and in Akiba's popularity poll, you ranked
    lower than the mother of Mr. Hata,
[08:53] ---
    who handles the title lettering.
    Kotaro Azumamiya, correct?
[08:55] ---
    Th-That's right!
[08:56] ---
    More like, don't explain
    my character unnecessarily!
[08:58] ---
    Hayate...
[09:00] ---
    Could it be that you thought
    I wrote that letter?
[09:03] ---
    N-No, I would never!
[09:05] ---
    Oh, please, as if I would think that.
[09:08] ---
    After all, you would never do
    something so girly like that.
[09:14] ---
    Hey, what's that supposed to mean?
[09:17] ---
    What do you mean that I would
    never do anything girly?
[09:21] ---
    No, there wasn't really any
    deep meaning behind that...
[09:23] ---
    Then what meaning was there?!
[09:25] ---
    So I've angered you again?!
[09:28] ---
    Looks like you've even
    alienated Miss Katsura.
[09:31] ---
    Serves you right.
[09:33] ---
    Never mind me.
[09:34] ---
    Why don't you go keep him company instead?
[09:36] ---
    H-Hinagiku?!
[09:39] ---
    Hear that, Ayasaki?!
[09:41] ---
    Looks like Miss Katsura wants to see
    me win a cool victory over you, too!
[09:45] ---
    I would ask you to do so as well.
[09:47] ---
    As one butler to another.
[09:49] ---
    Please serve as the Young Master's opponent.
[09:54] ---
    In these long 2.5 half-seasons,
[09:57] ---
    the Young Master has endured
    training from Hell!
[09:59] ---
    And he has finally discovered
    the secret to defeating you!
[10:08] ---
    For Azumamiya to fight against me?
[10:11] ---
    Precisely.
[10:12] ---
    For the wimpy Little Master Azumamiya
[10:15] ---
    to challenge someone to a fight
    of his own will is rare indeed.
[10:18] ---
    To turn your back on that would make
    you less of a man, would it not?
[10:23] ---
    Y-You have a point...
[10:24] ---
    Besides, if you were to refuse to fight,
[10:26] ---
    the bill for this shower of flower petals
    to be sent to Little Master Azumamiya
[10:30] ---
    would get sent to the
    Sanzenin family instead...
[10:32] ---
    Himuro, do I still need to keep going?
[10:34] ---
    Please hang in there, Little Master
    Taiga. It will be over soon.
[10:35] ---
    Fine. I will be your opponent, Azumamiya.
[10:38] ---
    Okay! I'll do my best for you, Himuro!
[10:39] ---
    Most gallant of you, Ayasaki!
[10:54] ---
    A secret technique he devised
    just to defeat me...
[10:56] ---
    What kind of technique could it be?
[10:58] ---
    Here goes.
[11:00] ---
    He discarded his bamboo sword?! Don't
    tell me he's going to fight unarmed?!
[11:03] ---
    The secret technique that I devised...
[11:06] ---
    This is it!
[11:09] ---
    Huh?
[11:09] ---
    My turn!
[11:13] ---
    A river!
[11:15] ---
    Um, what is the meaning of this?
[11:18] ---
    It's obvious, isn't it?! It's
    a cat's cradle competition!
[11:20] ---
    Huh?!
[11:21] ---
    The secret that the Young Master discovered
[11:23] ---
    over the course of the 2.5 half-seasons...
[11:25] ---
    It was that in the final analysis,
    he had no chance of winning at kendo!
[11:29] ---
    Such being the case, he came
    up with the ultimate strategy
[11:31] ---
    of defeating you in something
    that he most excels at!
[11:35] ---
    That is the Little Master Azumamiya for you.
[11:37] ---
    Truly a wimpy strategy in the extreme.
[11:39] ---
    Just how lame of a Nobita are you?
[11:41] ---
    What's wrong, Ayasaki?
    Admitting defeat already?
[11:44] ---
    You leave me no choice.
[11:46] ---
    I did accept your challenge, after all...
[11:51] ---
    The Murasame Liger from "Zoids Genesis"!
[11:54] ---
    What the heck is that?!
[11:56] ---
    Or rather, how can you
    make something like that?
[11:58] ---
    There is no such thing as
    the impossible for a butler.
[12:00] ---
    Wh-Why you...
[12:05] ---
    I lost...
[12:07] ---
    All my hard work, wearing through tens of
    thousands of loops of yarn, has been for naught!
[12:12] ---
    Just what kind of hard work was that?
[12:13] ---
    Young Master!
[12:15] ---
    Nonohara...
[12:16] ---
    Allowing a single defeat to
    break your spirit is pitiful!
[12:19] ---
    I believe I taught you sternly
    that if you are a man,
[12:21] ---
    you will keep crawling back up with
    dogged resolve until you are victorious!
[12:24] ---
    You're right! I can't go to pieces
    just because I've lost once!
[12:28] ---
    So you understand?
[12:30] ---
    And so...
[12:31] ---
    I challenge you, Taiga Ohkouchi!
[12:33] ---
    What?!
[12:34] ---
    That is my Young Master!
[12:36] ---
    Choosing and challenging an opponent
    who seems to offer certain victory!
[12:39] ---
    You have hit upon an excellent plan!
[12:40] ---
    H-Himuro!
[12:42] ---
    Interesting.
[12:43] ---
    Please do not underestimate my Little
    Master Taiga's abilities, Nonohara.
[12:47] ---
    How does it end up like this?!
[12:50] ---
    Um, would it be all right if I left already?
[12:52] ---
    But they're not listening.
[12:54] ---
    That reminds me. Where did Hinagiku go?
[13:00] ---
    Oh, really! Really! Really! I swear!
[13:02] ---
    Why did I get my hopes up that
    this letter was from Hayate?!
[13:08] ---
    Oh, it pisses me off!
[13:15] ---
    It's like I got dumped,
    and I don't even like him.
[13:23] ---
    Man, being young is so great!
[13:31] ---
    That is all.
[13:32] ---
    NOT ON DVD!
[13:32] ---
    Continuing on to the second half, leaving
    the Azumamiya vs Ohkouchi fight unfinished.
[13:38] ---
    I did my best, but it was no use!
    (Ganbattan dakedo dame datta!)
[13:42] ---
    Tarutaru monk recommended!
    (Tarutaru monku suishou shimasu!)
[13:51] ---
    It's no use!
[13:53] ---
    How can it be that I can't
    focus on my studies?!
[14:00] ---
    When you're in a funk, it really is best to
    go out into town for a change of scene...
[14:04] ---
    Say, what do you want for your birthday?
[14:07] ---
    As long as you're with me, Gintan,
    I don't want anything else!
[14:11] ---
    Yeah, you're right.
[14:12] ---
    The best way to spend birthdays is to be
    lovey-dovey and be with that special someone.
[14:16] ---
    Yup, yup.
[14:17] ---
    It would suck not to have that special
    someone to share your birthday with!
[14:18] ---
    Sheesh! Showoffs!
[14:23] ---
    It's so stupid.
[14:25] ---
    What does it matter if you have a
    boyfriend or not on your birthday?
[14:31] ---
    H-Hinagiku!
[14:32] ---
    Hayate, what are you doing here?
[14:35] ---
    I thought I might look
    for a new study guide...
[14:38] ---
    I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
[14:41] ---
    Wh-Why are you suddenly apologizing?
[14:43] ---
    Uh, I don't really know, but...
[14:45] ---
    I mean, it seems I made you
    angry again yesterday, so...
[14:56] ---
    Do you really feel bad about it?
[14:58] ---
    What?
[14:59] ---
    Then treat me to some tea.
[15:01] ---
    Huh?
[15:03] ---
    Thank you for waiting.
[15:05] ---
    Please enjoy.
[15:06] ---
    The cappuccinos are delicious here.
[15:09] ---
    I see...
[15:13] ---
    I wonder what's suddenly
    gotten into Hinagiku.
[15:19] ---
    It's rare to see you in
    normal clothes, Hayate.
[15:21] ---
    What? D-Do you think so?
[15:23] ---
    Yes, they look very good on you.
[15:27] ---
    Thank you very much.
[15:28] ---
    Um, you look very cute yourself, Hinagiku.
[15:32] ---
    What?
[15:34] ---
    H-Hayate, what are you
    saying all of a sudden?!
[15:37] ---
    Uh, no, I mean, that's not it.
    It's your outfit. Your outfit.
[15:40] ---
    Your outfit.
[15:41] ---
    What?
[15:42] ---
    Oh...
[15:43] ---
    Oh, my outfit.
[15:45] ---
    What? Um, what's gotten into you, Hinagiku?
[15:48] ---
    So, did you do all right on your exams?
[15:51] ---
    No...
[15:54] ---
    Come on, don't give me that sad look.
[15:57] ---
    Never mind all that. Let's
    forget about the bad stuff
[15:59] ---
    and go for a refreshing change of scenery!
[16:00] ---
    What?
[16:06] ---
    The neverending blue sky
[16:13] ---
    With a heart and mind fresh as can be
[16:13] ---
    Can you get me?
[16:14] ---
    It's so cute!
[16:16] ---
    I love it! I want it!
[16:19] ---
    Just watch! I'm going to get it for sure!
[16:22] ---
    Uh-huh...
[16:22] ---
    And that flower was of an innocent color
[16:27] ---
    Aw! And I spent everything I had on me, too!
[16:28] ---
    Making the petals sway with humming
[16:29] ---
    You want that stuffed animal that badly?
[16:33] ---
    I guess you have a girly side to you, too.
[16:34] ---
    If you're all show, then goodbye
[16:35] ---
    That's the second time!
[16:36] ---
    What?
[16:38] ---
    You said the same thing
    at school yesterday, too!
[16:39] ---
    That's not "love", right?
[16:40] ---
    Something about how I'd never
    do anything girly or something.
[16:41] ---
    The thing that makes me who I am
[16:43] ---
    Oh!
[16:44] ---
    N-No, that was...
[16:44] ---
    That one moment
[16:45] ---
    And I still hadn't asked you
    what you really thought.
[16:47] ---
    Make it blossom
[16:47] ---
    Huh?
[16:48] ---
    Admit it. You thought that I'd
    actually written that letter, right?
[16:51] ---
    What?!
[16:53] ---
    Power of Flower
[16:54] ---
    You did, didn't you?
[16:55] ---
    And someday, even that bud
[16:56] ---
    No, I would never think such a thing!
[16:58] ---
    Wh-What's that supposed to mean?!
[16:59] ---
    Will bloom large right in
    the middle of your heart
[17:00] ---
    That I'm really not girly?!
[17:04] ---
    Oh, there I go, opening my big mouth again!
[17:07] ---
    I-It's not like I'm seriously mad.
[17:07] ---
    Power of Flower
[17:09] ---
    At first, I thought that
    letter was from you, too...
[17:18] ---
    Stupid! Stupid! Go get the
    hell out of here, Hayate!
[17:20] ---
    Okay, bye-bye!
[17:26] ---
    It seems I've angered Hinagiku yet again.
[17:30] ---
    Why am I always like this?
[17:40] ---
    What am I doing?
[17:42] ---
    We were having fun and I just had
    to go and wreck it all on my own.
[17:50] ---
    I'm willful and I hate to lose...
[17:53] ---
    I've never shown my girly side...
[17:56] ---
    Not in front of Hayate.
[18:02] ---
    A kitten!
[18:04] ---
    Wh-What should I do?
[18:05] ---
    I can't go rescue it when
    it's so high up there!
[18:08] ---
    Wait, I feel like I was in a
    similar situation once before...
[18:16] ---
    Hey, why am I remembering that now?!
[18:19] ---
    Oh, you can't go that way!
[18:22] ---
    I'm coming to save you!
[18:31] ---
    No looking down!
[18:32] ---
    For now, just focus on my target overhead!
[18:36] ---
    Come on, come over here.
[18:38] ---
    There, there. Good kitty.
    Nothing to be scared of now.
[18:44] ---
    Thank goodness.
[18:45] ---
    I'll get you back to your
    mother right away...
[18:51] ---
    Help! Someone!
[18:54] ---
    I would come to your
    rescue if you'd just ask.
[18:59] ---
    H-Hayate...
[19:00] ---
    I would come to your rescue...
[19:06] ---
    Hayate!
[19:15] ---
    Are you all right, Hinagiku?
[19:18] ---
    What?
[19:19] ---
    Hayate?
[19:24] ---
    P-Pardon me.
[19:25] ---
    I-It's fine, it's no big deal. I-I
    should be the one thanking you.
[19:29] ---
    Um...
[19:30] ---
    Uh, here.
[19:31] ---
    Huh?
[19:34] ---
    You went to the trouble
    of getting that for me?
[19:39] ---
    I feel like you're always
    helping me out somehow.
[19:42] ---
    I told you, didn't I?
[19:44] ---
    That I would come to your
    rescue if you'd just ask.
[19:58] ---
    Well, I'm going this way, so...
[20:01] ---
    Yes.
[20:02] ---
    Thanks for keeping me company today.
[20:05] ---
    I had a lot of fun.
[20:07] ---
    Oh, please! I feel the same way.
[20:09] ---
    Say, if I call for you again,
    would you come for me?
[20:12] ---
    Yes. Please call for me whenever you like.
[20:15] ---
    Since I'm an expert at crane games.
[20:18] ---
    Then, see you again tomorrow.
[20:20] ---
    Goodbye.
[20:33] ---
    What's gotten into you, Hayate?
[20:35] ---
    Poor me...
[20:36] ---
    What are you brooding on self-pity for?
[20:38] ---
    Are you that unsure of
    how you did on the exams?
[20:41] ---
    No, that is not it...
[20:43] ---
    My wallet is completely empty
    due to an unplanned expenditure.
[20:47] ---
    Huh?
[20:49] ---
    Nagi, what shall we get
    for Hinagiku's birthday?
[20:53] ---
    I'll leave it to you.
[20:55] ---
    Um...
[20:56] ---
    Is Hinagiku's birthday coming up?
[20:59] ---
    Yes, it's March 3rd.
[21:02] ---
    I-I had no idea.
[21:04] ---
    Then, do you suppose I should
    get her a present as well?
[21:08] ---
    Why would you give Hinagiku a present?!
[21:10] ---
    And anyway, didn't you
    just say you were broke?!
[21:13] ---
    Yes, right...
[21:13] ---
    Besides, before you think about Hinagiku...
[21:19] ---
    Thank you, Hayate.
[21:23] ---
    Will Hinagiku call upon that special
    someone on her special day?
[21:28] ---
    But that is a different story.
[21:30] ---
    Maybe it'll get told at some
    other time in some other place.
[21:33] ---
    So, next time, they'll be battling
    against really ordinary stories.
[21:39] ---
    Yay! I won again!
[21:42] ---
    I-I have lost!
[21:43] ---
    Goodness! You are so good at
    this, Little Master Taiga!
[21:45] ---
    No, no, Young Master Azumamiya's
    wimpiness is truly without equal!
[21:49] ---
    How long are you guys going to keep at this?
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:17] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:26] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:43] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:53] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:26] ---
    This is Hinagiku Katsura's Butler Report!
[23:26] ---
    Hinagiku Katsura's
SIGN    Lettering by Shizuka Itou
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    Hello, I am Hinagiku Katsura.
[23:32] ---
    What did you all think of today's
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" episode?
[23:34] ---
    I think I might have had the
    most lines ever in that one.
[23:37] ---
    So, I got put in charge of the Butler
    Report for this episode, too,
[23:40] ---
    but I'm not sure what to talk about...
[23:43] ---
    Wait, what's this image?
[23:47] ---
    Wh-Wh-Wh-What is this?!
[23:49] ---
    When did you get this?!
[23:51] ---
    Hey, come on out, whoever's
    responsible for this!
[23:54] ---
    Oh, see you later!
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:58] ---
    Hello, there, everyone. How've you been?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:00] ---
    The next episode will feature us,
    the Student Council Girl Trio.
[24:04] ---
    Better hurry up and go buy a Blu-ray
    player equipped with a DVR!
[24:08] ---
    Hey, what in the world is the episode about?
[24:10] ---
    You will have to wait and see.
[24:12] ---
    All right! Stand by until
    the next episode airs!
[24:15] ---
    Next time, "Ordinary Stories"!
[24:18] ---
    I'll be making a solid appearance
    as well, so not to worry.
[24:19] ---
    Ordinary Stories
[24:20] ---
    Come Fusion! Grand Cross! with "Hayate
    the Combat Butler" again next time!
[24:24] ---
    

49 - Ordinary Stories

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:12] ---
    Oh, it'll be spring soon.
[00:14] ---
    The third term will be
    over before we know it.
[00:17] ---
    You think so? It felt incredibly long to me.
[00:20] ---
    But the only days you attended school
[00:22] ---
    are that day with the whole fuss
    about Miss Katsura possibly quitting
[00:24] ---
    and in the episode that
    aired before this one.
[00:27] ---
    I'm technically the main heroine,
[00:28] ---
    so I can't ditch in an episode
    centered on Hakuou Academy...
[00:33] ---
    There you go again with that nonsense...
[00:36] ---
    Okay, we're leaving, Hayate.
[00:38] ---
    Sheesh. School is just such a drag.
[00:41] ---
    Well, it'd be a different story if this
    were Hourai Academy or Cromartie High.
[00:47] ---
    Also, I'd love to wear the
    Ashford Academy's uniform.
[00:51] ---
    *The Miss's dislike for school
    certainly is a problem... *
[00:56] ---
    Well, well, if it isn't...
[00:59] ---
    ...Hayata and Nagi!
[01:02] ---
    Man, what a coincidence!
[01:04] ---
    What might you ladies be up to?
[01:06] ---
    We thought we would participate
    in some club activities for once.
[01:09] ---
    Club activities?
[01:10] ---
    Wow, I had totally assumed that you
    all belonged to the "Go Home" Club.
[01:16] ---
    Curious, Hayata?
[01:18] ---
    What?! No, not especially...
[01:20] ---
    What was that? You'd love to come observe?
[01:23] ---
    Huh?
[01:23] ---
    Then come drop by the club room!
[01:25] ---
    Come, come!
[01:28] ---
    Oh, w-wait!
[01:31] ---
    *Just as we'd planned. *
[01:33] ---
    *Do you know, ladies and gentlemen? *
[01:35] ---
    *That a humongous mansion like
    this exists somewhere in Tokyo? *
[01:40] ---
    *The Miss's name is Nagi Sanzenin. And... *
[01:44] ---
    *Her butler's name is Hayate Ayasaki. *
[01:47] ---
    *They are both a bit clueless *
[01:49] ---
    *and both have a bit of the
    wrong idea about each other, *
[01:51] ---
    *but they share the immensely strong, loving
    bond between servant and mistress. *
[01:57] ---
    This is a story from when Smiley-Smiley
    were still able to fly in the sky.
[02:02] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:05] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:07] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:13] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[02:18] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[02:24] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[02:29] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[02:35] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[02:40] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[02:45] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[02:51] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[02:57] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[02:59] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[03:02] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[03:07] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[03:10] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[03:13] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[03:32] ---
    Ordinary Stories
[03:36] ---
    Society for the Research of Video?
[03:38] ---
    Society for the Research of Video
[03:38] ---
    Or rather, this is an awfully
    distinctive club house...
[03:42] ---
    This building was apparently designed
    to the tastes of our founding senpai.
[03:49] ---
    Oh!
[03:50] ---
    This is 16mm film!
[03:50] ---
    Illustrative Clip
[03:51] ---
    And this is a super-HARP camera!
[03:54] ---
    Oh, I get it!
[03:56] ---
    In other words, this is a film society!
[03:57] ---
    A society for the research of film!
[03:59] ---
    Huh?
[04:00] ---
    What are you saying?
[04:01] ---
    Mr. Rabbit.
[04:02] ---
    Huh? It's not?
[04:05] ---
    We've got no interest
    whatsoever in making films.
[04:07] ---
    We can't do difficult things like that.
[04:10] ---
    Then, what do you do?
[04:12] ---
    What else?!
[04:15] ---
    We record and collect interesting and
    funny videos, both past and present,
[04:19] ---
    and burst out laughing together!
[04:21] ---
    That is what we do here,
[04:22] ---
    always smiley-smiley Society
    for the Research of Video!
[04:24] ---
    For short, we call it...
[04:25] ---
    YouTuubee
[04:26] ---
    YouTuubee!
[04:28] ---
    F-For short?
[04:29] ---
    In other words, it is a "Killing Time" Club.
[04:32] ---
    Who are you accusing of killing time?!
[04:33] ---
    Society for the Research of Video, huh?
[04:36] ---
    It sounds a bit interesting.
[04:38] ---
    *What?! U-Unbelievable! *
[04:40] ---
    *The Miss is taking an interest in
    having dealings with other people! *
[04:43] ---
    *No, isn't she taking an interest in videos? *
[04:46] ---
    Come to think of it, are you
    involved in any clubs, Little Nagi?
[04:49] ---
    Huh? No, nothing especially right now...
[04:51] ---
    Ah! Then why don't you give this a try?
[04:53] ---
    Our club was originally formed
    to make videos of cute girls,
[04:56] ---
    so it's an easygoing club.
[04:58] ---
    It'll at least serve to make some memories.
[05:01] ---
    Hmm, what should I do...
[05:04] ---
    *Th-This is an opportunity! *
[05:05] ---
    *The Miss tends to socially withdrawn, *
[05:07] ---
    *so this is a unique chance to have
    her enjoy a proper school life! *
[05:11] ---
    *How could I call myself a butler
    if I do not encourage this?! *
[05:14] ---
    *All right! *
[05:15] ---
    Wow, that sounds very interesting.
[05:18] ---
    So? So? What kind of videos
    do you make, specifically?
[05:22] ---
    Well, our projects are just
    kind of scattered over there.
[05:26] ---
    Oh, then let us watch some of it.
[05:32] ---
    As I recall, you said you
    made videos of cute girls...
[05:39] ---
    Hello, I'm Hayako Ayasaki.
[05:41] ---
    I'm a slightly mischievous 16-year-old.
[05:44] ---
    Oh, someone wonderful, come
    take Hayako on a date!
[05:49] ---
    Oh! That was a great project!
[05:53] ---
    What are you doing secretly taping me?!
[05:54] ---
    And you even dubbed dialogue over it!
[05:56] ---
    What's wrong with that? It's fun.
[05:57] ---
    Incidentally, we have cameras
    set up all over the place.
[06:00] ---
    From the top of Mount Everest to Shizuka's
    bathing room at the Minamoto residence.
[06:07] ---
    No filming! No filming!
[06:09] ---
    Then how about something like this?
[06:11] ---
    What?
[06:16] ---
    Miss Makimura, I... I just...
[06:20] ---
    Y-You can't, Ayasaki. You and
    I are student and teacher!
[06:25] ---
    Oh, I want to stay like
    this forever with you!
[06:29] ---
    You dumb jerk! Don't make trouble for me!
[06:31] ---
    Havin' affairs shows what a man's made of.
[06:33] ---
    Women provide fodder for the arts.
[06:41] ---
    This makes it look like I'm some
    terribly licentious "sensualist"!
[06:46] ---
    Hey, Hayate, what was that just now?!
[06:49] ---
    Th-They're accidents! Every single
    one of them was by complete accident!
[06:53] ---
    Miss.
[06:56] ---
    Let us excuse ourselves now.
[06:58] ---
    What? You're leaving, Hayata?
[07:00] ---
    You just got here.
[07:02] ---
    Being shown any more strange
    videos is more than I can bear!
[07:08] ---
    Don't say that!
[07:09] ---
    Please, help us!
[07:12] ---
    Huh? Help you? What do you mean?
[07:18] ---
    You seem to be having fun, my friends.
[07:20] ---
    Ms. Superintendent! Wh-What
    are you doing here?
[07:23] ---
    Today is Onsite Club Inspection Day,
    which Mistress Kuzuha conducts herself!
[07:27] ---
    Huh? Onsite inspection?
[07:30] ---
    I check to make sure no one is deviating
    from what students should be doing.
[07:33] ---
    That's right.
[07:35] ---
    Wow, I guess she does some
    serious work once in a while.
[07:39] ---
    Do not be fooled, Hayata.
[07:42] ---
    What?
[07:44] ---
    There's no way she's doing serious work!
[07:46] ---
    You have no idea how the students have
    suffered because of these onsite inspections!
[07:50] ---
    For example, the tennis team...
[07:53] ---
    They don't even have a lethal technique
    on the order of a Boomerang Snake?
[07:56] ---
    Disbanded.
[07:58] ---
    And the American football team...
[08:02] ---
    They can't even do the Sky Devil Bat Dive?
[08:04] ---
    Disbanded.
[08:06] ---
    Furthermore, the Puppeteering Club...
[08:06] ---
    I have come to save you, princess!
[08:07] ---
    "Will you wind? Or not wind?" is it?
[08:08] ---
    Thank you.
[08:10] ---
    So they're not windup dolls...
[08:10] ---
    Come, let us go home.
[08:12] ---
    Disbanded.
[08:14] ---
    Thus, countless clubs have been shut down.
[08:18] ---
    I don't wanna get shut down!
[08:21] ---
    Which is why we were plotting
    to invite into our club
[08:24] ---
    the superintendent's favorite guys,
    which is to say, you, Hayata,
[08:27] ---
    and furthermore, to show her
    numerous seductive videos of you,
[08:30] ---
    which would strike a chord
    with the superintendent!
[08:33] ---
    And yet...
[08:34] ---
    Uh, but there's no way the superintendent
    would enjoy seeing such...
[08:39] ---
    Wh-What?!
[08:40] ---
    Th-This was candid video of Hayate Ayasaki
    in delightfully embarrassing situations?!
[08:45] ---
    I wish I could've seen it!
[08:46] ---
    I totally wish I could've seen it!
[08:48] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha!
[08:50] ---
    I have made up my mind!
[08:51] ---
    I order the Society for the Research
    of Video to be disbanded at once!
[08:53] ---
    What?!
[08:56] ---
    Starting tomorrow, you will be the
    Society for the Research of Ono no Imoko
[08:58] ---
    or the Society for the Research of
    Eating Udon Noodles Through Your Nose!
[09:02] ---
    Can't you at least make
    it a more normal club?
[09:04] ---
    Aw, man, and we were about to
    make the best video of all, too.
[09:09] ---
    What? The best video of all?
[09:11] ---
    We were planning on showing
    it to you, too, but...
[09:15] ---
    What kind of video was it?
[09:17] ---
    A collection of end credit bloopers!
[09:20] ---
    End credit...?
[09:22] ---
    Oh, you know all those Jackie films?
[09:24] ---
    You know how his films show
    bloopers during the end credits?
[09:27] ---
    Those things.
[09:29] ---
    "Those things"...
[09:30] ---
    Oh-ho...
[09:31] ---
    I like those.
[09:33] ---
    I have to say I think
    Jackie's not bad myself.
[09:35] ---
    *Unbelievable! *
[09:36] ---
    *The Miss is showing interest in
    something that is not 2-dimensional! *
[09:39] ---
    *As a butler, I absolutely must
    do this for my mistress! *
[09:47] ---
    Hey!
[09:49] ---
    If you want to back out, now's your chance!
[09:55] ---
    Go for it, Hayate!
[09:59] ---
    This is incredible!
[10:00] ---
    There's no way I can miss this!
[10:02] ---
    Uh, I think it might be
    better if he didn't...
[10:06] ---
    Then, here I go, everyone!
[10:08] ---
    So will Jackie do it?!
[10:10] ---
    Fly, Jackie!
[10:17] ---
    *Meanwhile, right around the same time... *
[10:19] ---
    Oh, Miss Makimura, you can't
    videotape stuff like this!
[10:25] ---
    Honestly! I said, no!
[10:31] ---
    I never imagined such old
    footage would surface again...
[10:34] ---
    *In the world of the internet, *
[10:36] ---
    *it is difficult to recover video
    that has once been circulated. *
[10:38] ---
    *Be careful with that. *
[10:42] ---
    I-I love you, okay? Sheesh.
    (Su-Sukinanda kara, mou.)
[10:46] ---
    I'm crying because I'm happy, you moron!
    (Ureshi-naki ja, boke!)
[10:49] ---
    First Hakuou Academy Society
    for the Research of Video...
[10:52] ---
    ...Fun-Fun...
[10:53] ---
    ...Ordinary Story Championship!
[10:56] ---
    Huh? What is this all of a sudden?
[10:59] ---
    Come on. What is this?
[11:01] ---
    Why the...
[11:02] ---
    ...title says it all!
[11:03] ---
    For the Society for the Research of
    Video, safety really comes first!
[11:05] ---
    We have decided to return
    to our original purpose
[11:08] ---
    and make videos that the entire family
    can enjoy in their living rooms!
[11:10] ---
    Yup!
[11:12] ---
    Uh...
[11:13] ---
    After everything we've been through,
    we won't let you back out now.
[11:16] ---
    We entered into a secret agreement
    with the superintendent
[11:18] ---
    that if we submit a funny
    video with you in it,
[11:21] ---
    she'll triple our budget for the next term!
[11:23] ---
    When did you do that?!
[11:25] ---
    And Little Nagi's given her consent
    to cooperate as a member of the club.
[11:29] ---
    What?!
[11:30] ---
    I saw nothing wrong with that.
[11:32] ---
    But what is this Ordinary Story Championship?
[11:35] ---
    So good of you to ask, Nagi-pon!
[11:37] ---
    In other words, Nagi-rin...
[11:39] ---
    ...this is what it's about, Nagi Springfield!
[11:42] ---
    Uh, um, won't you please address
    me normally as "Nagi"...?
[11:45] ---
    It happened when I was back in grade school.
[11:47] ---
    Um...
[11:48] ---
    I went to this one shabby fishing
    village in the countryside.
[11:52] ---
    It was as if time had
    stopped in this village.
[11:56] ---
    It was a pretty spooky place to begin with,
[11:59] ---
    but at the bed and breakfast where
    we stayed, there was even...
[12:01] ---
    ...a crumbling statue of Kinjiro
    Ninomiya facing the ocean.
[12:06] ---
    According to the proprietress
    of the bed and breakfast...
[12:08] ---
    You see, at night, that statue
    turns around to glare behind him
[12:11] ---
    to make sure none of the children
    staying at the inn are up.
[12:14] ---
    So you must never stay up late.
[12:18] ---
    Oh, I've heard of these.
[12:20] ---
    I see, so you're going to
    collect these common stories.
[12:24] ---
    No!
[12:26] ---
    This is where the story gets good.
[12:28] ---
    When I heard that, it made me want
    to see if it was true, you know?
[12:32] ---
    So a bunch of us kids snuck out
    in the middle of the night.
[12:36] ---
    It was truly the dead of night.
[12:38] ---
    Even thinking back now, I
    wish we hadn't gone, but...
[12:42] ---
    It was pitch black.
[12:44] ---
    And the weather was bad, too.
[12:45] ---
    The wind sounded like people moaning...
[12:49] ---
    We waited for 10 minutes, then 20.
[12:51] ---
    It was summer, but oddly chilly.
[12:54] ---
    And suddenly, we looked around
    and we couldn't believe our eyes!
[13:00] ---
    Before we knew it, we'd fallen
    asleep and morning had come.
[13:03] ---
    So, what about the Kinjiro statue?
[13:06] ---
    Well, we were all asleep,
    so we weren't able to check.
[13:09] ---
    What?!
[13:10] ---
    What a worthless story! And you
    spent roughly 17 scenes telling it?!
[13:14] ---
    So, we're going to collect stories like that,
[13:17] ---
    where only ordinary things happen
    that aren't worth telling about.
[13:19] ---
    And we want to collect videos
    that'll make you think,
[13:22] ---
    "Aw, man, that sure was a waste of time!"
[13:25] ---
    There is no need for such videos!
[13:29] ---
    But everyone's got a worthless
    story or two like that!
[13:34] ---
    Come on now. Are you sure
    you don't have one, too?
[13:37] ---
    A worthless story that you have tucked away?
[13:40] ---
    W-Well...
[13:42] ---
    I, um...
[13:44] ---
    ...used to live in a really rundown
    house when I was little, but...
[13:47] ---
    Yeah, yeah?
[13:48] ---
    You have a story?!
[13:51] ---
    This house was really truly rundown
[13:53] ---
    and the windows always rattled at night.
[13:58] ---
    One night, I was at home alone
[14:00] ---
    and back then, our electricity had
    been stopped, so it was pitch black.
[14:04] ---
    I tried to get in my futon and go to sleep,
[14:07] ---
    but I suddenly realized something.
[14:09] ---
    That strangely, the rattling sound
    was louder than usual somehow.
[14:15] ---
    I should've been scared,
[14:16] ---
    but I went to the window, as if
    I was drawn there by something...
[14:20] ---
    I gently drew the curtain aside and
    slowly looked out the window...
[14:25] ---
    And the wind was blowing harder than usual.
[14:31] ---
    What of it?!
[14:33] ---
    Nothing happened!
[14:35] ---
    Huh?
[14:36] ---
    But that is precisely what
    we were talking about.
[14:38] ---
    That's our Hayata! That was a good story!
[14:40] ---
    Uh, thank you very much.
[14:42] ---
    Me, me, me! I wanna tell a story, too!
[14:45] ---
    Miss Katsura! Where did you come from?!
[14:49] ---
    You know how I'm not in the
    night duty room during the day?
[14:53] ---
    One day, after work, I suddenly
    felt it the moment I went inside.
[14:59] ---
    I thought, "Oh, something's strange."
[15:01] ---
    At a glance, nothing had changed
    in the room, but I could tell.
[15:04] ---
    That something important was gone.
[15:09] ---
    I searched my room thoroughly
[15:12] ---
    and I finally figured out what was missing.
[15:17] ---
    It was...
[15:18] ---
    It was?
[15:19] ---
    ...that my wallet was completely empty!
[15:23] ---
    What the hell?!
[15:25] ---
    With a 500 million percent certainty,
    that's because you spent it yourself!
[15:29] ---
    Oh? The mic...
[15:30] ---
    If I may be so bold, I think I will
    have you listen to my story as well.
[15:34] ---
    Mr. Klaus?! Um, this is our school...
[15:38] ---
    Since it has come to this, I will
    appear in any scene I can get into.
[15:41] ---
    Now, ahem.
[15:43] ---
    There was a time at the Sanzenin residence
[15:45] ---
    when we had a dog named Lucky
    running loose in the yard.
[15:48] ---
    Come to think of it, we had
    a stupid dog like that...
[15:52] ---
    He certainly was a stupid dog,
[15:54] ---
    but well, by around 6 in the evening, he
    would always be back in his hut, sleeping.
[15:57] ---
    Lucky
[15:58] ---
    But one day, evening came
    and he had not returned.
[16:01] ---
    Lucky
[16:02] ---
    He was left running loose, but he did
    not appear to have left the yard.
[16:05] ---
    However, no matter how stupid he was,
[16:07] ---
    it seemed unlikely that he
    had gotten lost in the yard.
[16:09] ---
    I looked for Lucky all night long.
[16:12] ---
    But he was nowhere to be
    found and a day passed...
[16:16] ---
    And a second day passed...
[16:19] ---
    Lucky did not return to his hut.
[16:22] ---
    However, on the third day, unbelievably,
    Lucky was back in his hut!
[16:27] ---
    Ooh!
[16:28] ---
    Wh-Why?!
[16:31] ---
    Uh, that was the end of the story.
[16:35] ---
    Thank you for listening.
[16:38] ---
    What happened to Lucky
    during those three days?!
[16:40] ---
    Who knows?
[16:42] ---
    Take that!
[16:45] ---
    Then, could I try telling a story, too?
[16:48] ---
    We were cleaning up around the house
    when Kotetsu found an old wooden box.
[16:53] ---
    Unbelievably, what we found inside
[16:56] ---
    was the withered mummified
    hand of a water imp!
[16:58] ---
    And there were words carved into
    the back of the wooden box.
[17:02] ---
    It said that this hand would
    grant its owner any 3 wishes.
[17:06] ---
    So? Did you make any wishes?
[17:08] ---
    Don't do it! There's bound
    to be a terrible curse!
[17:11] ---
    The thing is, unbelievably...
[17:13] ---
    Unbelievably...
[17:14] ---
    ...we put it out with the
    unburnable trash the next day!
[17:17] ---
    What?!
[17:17] ---
    Hey, shouldn't a water imp's
    hand be burnable trash?
SIGN    Sorting and collection of trash differs by region.
[17:20] ---
    Yes, that is right. It is burnable trash.
SIGN    Your local municipality will have the information, but...
[17:22] ---
    Oh, right. That was careless of us.
SIGN    Lately, there has been a lot of trash that has been sorted wrongly.
SIGN    Be sure to properly sort burnable trash, unburnable trash, etc.
[17:25] ---
    And it's turned into an ordinary
    discussion of trash...
SIGN    and put it out on time on the day of collection in the trash collection area.
[17:28] ---
    All right, I am next.
[17:31] ---
    Are you familiar with
    the term "doppelganger"?
[17:35] ---
    This refers to a phenomenon where you bump
    into someone who looks exactly like you.
[17:40] ---
    It is said that those who see their
    doppelganger will die soon thereafter.
[17:44] ---
    Supposedly, Lincoln also saw his
    the day before he was assassinated.
[17:47] ---
    The Japanese poet Murou Saisei...
[17:49] ---
    He also had just such a doppelganger.
[17:51] ---
    This is sounding rather like an urban legend.
[17:57] ---
    Don't you think "Murou Saisei" sounds just
    like "slow saisei (slow motion replay)"?
[18:01] ---
    What?!
SIGN    "toudai motokurashi (the darkest place is under the candlestick)"
[18:03] ---
    Also, "toudai motokurashi" and "Taisho
    democracy" are exactly alike.
[18:07] ---
    And also "Jurassic Park" and "Juraku
    ni nisan-paku (2-3 nights at Juraku)".
[18:09] ---
    This is more like a meaningless
    story than an ordinary one...
[18:13] ---
    Whether you believe or not is up to you.
[18:16] ---
    Um...
[18:18] ---
    If you would like, I could tell
    a story about my family home.
[18:22] ---
    Oh, Saki!
[18:23] ---
    My family home was rundown
[18:25] ---
    and the stairs creaked
    whenever one of us used it.
[18:30] ---
    One day, the entire family
    was having dinner downstairs,
[18:34] ---
    when we heard the familiar
    noise from the stairs.
[18:37] ---
    So, my mother said, "Our home really
    has become rundown, hasn't it?"
[18:41] ---
    And she had it remodeled.
[18:42] ---
    And what an ordinary story that was!
[18:45] ---
    Sheesh!
[18:46] ---
    I've been listening for a while now and
    you've been telling some boring stories.
[18:50] ---
    Oh? Wataru?
[18:51] ---
    Oh, I was wondering who
    had come, but you are...
[18:53] ---
    Club President! You're our club president!
[18:55] ---
    Club president?
[18:56] ---
    Yup, that's right.
[18:57] ---
    This boy is none other than
[18:59] ---
    the current president of the Society for
    the Research of Video, Wataru Tachibana!
[19:03] ---
    Ta-da!
[19:05] ---
    Uh, they just made me their
    president without asking,
[19:08] ---
    When in the world?
[19:10] ---
    I will have you know, our
    president is amazing.
[19:12] ---
    He makes anime MAD openings that
    ordinary people would think were real.
[19:17] ---
    All the "guy voice" videos were
    made by the president, too!
[19:20] ---
    What?!
[19:21] ---
    No, it's not true.
[19:23] ---
    When you get down to it, all your stories
    are just left hanging there with no punch line.
[19:27] ---
    That's our president for you.
[19:29] ---
    Then, what?
[19:30] ---
    Are you saying you can tell a
    funny story that has a punch line?
[19:33] ---
    Hard to say.
[19:35] ---
    All I'm saying is that I want an ordinary
    story that touches the heart more.
[19:40] ---
    An ordinary story that touches the heart...
[19:43] ---
    Yeah, for example...
[19:45] ---
    This is about the universe, but...
[19:47] ---
    You know that the universe is expanding
    at an incredible rate, right?
[19:50] ---
    Y-Yes...
[19:52] ---
    At the same time, you also know that light's
    the fastest thing in the universe, right?
[19:57] ---
    Well, that's common knowledge.
[19:59] ---
    But the universe's rate of expansion gets
    faster the farther it is from Earth.
[20:04] ---
    So the farther a star is from
    Earth, the faster it's moving away
[20:10] ---
    and finally, impossibly, those
    stars surpass the speed of light!
[20:15] ---
    What?!
[20:16] ---
    What did you say?!
[20:20] ---
    Isn't that fascinating?
[20:23] ---
    P-President...
[20:24] ---
    Could it be that's the end?
[20:28] ---
    *Thus, they say an incredibly
    meaningless day ended. *
[20:36] ---
    I wish something nice would happen.
[20:38] ---
    Huh?
[20:39] ---
    A p-peach?! What's it doing here?
[20:42] ---
    Th-This is...!
[20:44] ---
    I can't reach it!
[20:46] ---
    I know! Since I can't reach it...
[20:49] ---
    I'll buy a can of peaches on the way home.
[20:51] ---
    Ring-a-ding. Ring-a-ding.
[20:53] ---
    *And here was yet another ordinary story. *
[20:55] ---
    *Next time, they will fight against
    a neighborhood quiz contest. *
[21:00] ---
    Right now, we're in front of Yukiji's room.
[21:03] ---
    Let's go right ahead and check
    to see if she's up or not.
[21:07] ---
    Oops, but before we do...
[21:11] ---
    To all of you watching "Hayate
    the Combat Butler"...
[21:14] ---
    This will probably be the last time
    that we will be featured in an episode.
[21:18] ---
    This and that. Looking back, a lot
    of things happened, didn't it?
[21:22] ---
    Yup, yup.
[21:23] ---
    It puts us in a slightly sentimental mood.
[21:26] ---
    But the end is the start
    of the end of the start.
[21:29] ---
    Let us meet again someday!
[21:31] ---
    And a one, two... Bye-bye!
[21:33] ---
    Miss Committee Chairman,
     Red Izumi Segawa
[21:33] ---
    Hey, come wake me up!
[21:35] ---
    Vice Chairman, Blue Miki Hanabishi
[21:35] ---
    It's rare, I tell you! Rare!
[21:36] ---
    Video of me waking up will easily get
    300,000 views and 100,000 comments in one night!
[21:36] ---
    Disciplinary Committee Member,
     Black Risa Asakaze
[21:45] ---
    I nailed it!
[21:47] ---
    No way!
[21:50] ---
    The End
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:12] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:17] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:26] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:35] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:43] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:49] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:53] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:27] ---
    ...and Hayate...
[23:28] ---
    17-year-old Maria's Butler Report
SIGN    Lettering by Rie Tanaka
[23:28] ---
    ...and 17-year-old Maria's...
[23:29] ---
    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    ...Butler Report!
[23:31] ---
    Pakkyuruun, I'm Nagi Sanzenin!
[23:33] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:34] ---
    I am Maria, 17 years old.
[23:35] ---
    The days have been cold, but
    I hope you've been well.
[23:38] ---
    When it's cold like this, it's best
    not to force yourself to go out
[23:40] ---
    and to immerse yourself
    in online games at home.
[23:41] ---
    If you do that, you won't become a
    master at living life like Maria.
[23:44] ---
    Oh, my, Hayate. But I'm only a
    year older than you, you know.
[23:47] ---
    Oh, pardon me, but you're so mature.
    Even kind of middle-aged...
[23:50] ---
    Now, here's today's fan service shot.
[23:52] ---
    Please continue to give your support
    to "Hayate the Combat Butler".
[23:56] ---
    Preview
[23:56] ---
    Shine! Jump out! Shake your hips!
[23:59] ---
    *The 4256th High School Girls Ultra Quiz! *
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:03] ---
    *Your hosts will be myself, Teruo Mikiri... *
[24:05] ---
    ...and Demonking Abe, tima!
[24:07] ---
    The participating duos will be 10,000 pairs of
    girls who have gathered from all across the country, tima!
[24:10] ---
    *Now, which pair will win
    the crown of victory? *
[24:13] ---
    I can't wait, tima!
[24:14] ---
    Next time, "Quiz! Written as
    'Foe' and Read as 'Friend'!!"
[24:17] ---
    Why do I have to end up
    in this with the hamster?
[24:19] ---
    Quiz! Written as "Foe" and Read as "Friend"!!
[24:19] ---
    Once again, next time on "Hayate the Combat
    Butler", we'll be doing... the straining pose!
[24:22] ---
    I feel the surge!
[24:25] ---
    

50 - Quiz! Written as 'Foe' and Read as 'Friend'

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:09] ---
    Good morning, Miss!
[00:12] ---
    Come now.
[00:13] ---
    Please get up!
[00:18] ---
    What the heck? It's still
    late night 32:00 o'clock.
[00:20] ---
    Let me sleep a little more.
[00:23] ---
    Please do not say that.
[00:25] ---
    It is a pleasantly warm day outside today.
[00:30] ---
    Why not go out for once?
[00:34] ---
    I will pack us a lunch.
[00:37] ---
    Mr. Rice Ball. Mr. Rice Ball.
SIGN    High School Girls Ultra Quiz!!
[00:40] ---
    And look, there are spring-like
    events being held everywhere.
[00:43] ---
    How about trying this one?
[00:44] ---
    High School Girls Ultra Quiz.
[00:46] ---
    To participate, you have to be a pair
    of super-best friend high school girls.
[00:49] ---
    This is stupid.
[00:50] ---
    Who are these fools who sign up
    for these things willy-nilly?
[00:53] ---
    What a shame.
[00:55] ---
    It says they welcome
    last-minute participants.
[00:57] ---
    And the prize is...
[01:00] ---
    M-Miss?
[01:02] ---
    If I win this, I get this?
[01:06] ---
    This... This...
[01:08] ---
    ...will be mine?!
[01:10] ---
    All right, I'll enter!
[01:12] ---
    What? Why?
[01:13] ---
    So that's what's going on.
    How about pairing up with me?
[01:16] ---
    How 'bout it? Ya'll do it, right?
    Ya will, right? Awesome, right?
[01:18] ---
    What? You're in Osaka?
    At the Nanba Grand Kagetsu Theater?
[01:21] ---
    Damn it! She hung up on me!
[01:22] ---
    So Sakuya was a no-go.
[01:23] ---
    Then I'll try Isumi next.
[01:25] ---
    No, not happening.
[01:29] ---
    Who can I pair up with?
[01:31] ---
    Why don't you just enter, Hayate?
[01:34] ---
    I have several high school
    girl outfits ready to go.
[01:36] ---
    What?!
[01:36] ---
    Ooh, I hadn't thought of that!
[01:38] ---
    I-I will go look for someone
    who might pair up with you!
[01:43] ---
    Damn, he got away.
[01:45] ---
    Wow, a quiz contest, huh?
[01:47] ---
    I wonder if entering something like
    this will make a good youthful memory.
[01:51] ---
    Wait, one of the prizes is...
[01:52] ---
    An all-you-can-eat ticket to Mo-Para!
SIGN    Shabu-shabu All-You-Can-Eat Ticket!!
SIGN    Can't
    show you!
[01:55] ---
    This might be good!
[01:57] ---
    Imagine it! Poofity-poof!
[01:59] ---
    Poof! Poof!
[02:01] ---
    Poofity-poof!
[02:04] ---
    Just kidding!
[02:05] ---
    Totally just kidding!
[02:08] ---
    In my wildest dreams,
    if I do say so myself...
[02:13] ---
    But...
[02:14] ---
    If I do win...
[02:16] ---
    Maybe I could invite him.
    Maybe I could invite him...
[02:19] ---
    B-But...
[02:23] ---
    Who...? Who...?
[02:26] ---
    Who should I enter it with?!
[02:31] ---
    Ow, that hurt...
[02:33] ---
    Hayate!
[02:34] ---
    Miss Nishizawa! P-Please pardon me.
[02:36] ---
    I was lost in thought...
[02:39] ---
    Th-This is...
[02:40] ---
    Ah! This is...!
[02:42] ---
    What good, good timing you have!
[02:45] ---
    Huh?
[02:47] ---
    Miss Nishizawa.
[02:49] ---
    Y-Yes?
[02:51] ---
    Won't you please enter
    this quiz contest together?
[02:55] ---
    Y-Yes.
[02:58] ---
    Thank goodness! Miss Nagi will be pleased!
[03:00] ---
    Huh? What?
[03:03] ---
    In this episode, I will be serving
    as a famous host of the Heisei Era!
[03:08] ---
    Tima!
[03:09] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[03:12] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[03:14] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[03:20] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[03:25] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[03:31] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[03:36] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[03:42] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[03:47] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[03:52] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[03:58] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[04:03] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[04:06] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[04:09] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[04:14] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[04:17] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[04:20] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[04:38] ---
    Quiz! Written as "Foe"
    and Read as "Friend"!!
[04:44] ---
    Shine! Jump out! Shake your hips! Come on!
[04:46] ---
    The 4256th High School Girls Ultra Quiz!
[04:53] ---
    Now, with the hard-to-draw crowd
    of several tens of thousands watching,
[04:57] ---
    it's begun!
[04:58] ---
    I am Teruo Mikiri, host and narrator, and...
[05:02] ---
    ...Demonking Abe!
    Here to bring you the event, tima!
[05:04] ---
    Incidentally...
[05:05] ---
    Do any of you remember me, tima?
[05:08] ---
    Hey, don't try to hog all the attention.
[05:11] ---
    Please forgive me, tima.
[05:13] ---
    And now, here come the participating pairs.
SIGN    End of Century
SIGN    Empire
[05:15] ---
    10,000 pairs, who have gathered
    from all across the nation, tima.
[05:18] ---
    Which pair will fight their
    way through this quiz battle
[05:21] ---
    and win the crown of victory?!
[05:22] ---
    I can't wait to see, tima!
SIGN    Vice President/Secretary
[05:24] ---
    Aika, why are we here right now?
[05:28] ---
    I thought that you might
    like shabu-shabu, Chiharu.
SIGN    Protagonist/Hammy
[05:34] ---
    Why do I have to end up in this
    with the hamster?
[05:36] ---
    That's my line!
[05:38] ---
    This is like being
    handicapped from the start.
[05:43] ---
    Suck it up! Suck it up, me!
[05:45] ---
    Well, my abilities alone will be
    more than enough to win this,
[05:48] ---
    so I don't care whether I'm paired
    with a hammy or a sausage.
[05:51] ---
    If I can't put up with this,
    what'll I do when I get a job
[05:53] ---
    and my boss turns out to be
    a sexually harassing bastard?
[05:55] ---
    Or actually, this is the very first favor
[05:57] ---
    that none other than Hayate
    has asked of me, after all.
[06:00] ---
    All right, let's win this quick
    and take the trophy.
[06:03] ---
    Once I win, I'm going to
    have shabu-shabu with Hayate!
[06:07] ---
    What are you saying?!
    I will never permit that!
[06:09] ---
    What?!
[06:10] ---
    If you want to eat, eat alone,
    in solitude with a lonely heart.
[06:13] ---
    Not happening. You can tell me no,
    but it's too late now.
[06:16] ---
    No way I'm backing down! No way!
[06:17] ---
    Hayate and the trophy are both mine!
[06:19] ---
    Hayate's having shabu-shabu with me!
[06:23] ---
    I made up my mind.
[06:25] ---
    This year, I'm going to pursue Hayate,
    even to the ends of the Earth.
[06:30] ---
    They both seem to be
    full of fighting spirit...
[06:34] ---
    And now, let's get started with Stage 1!
[06:37] ---
    Your first hurdle is your typical
    "true or false" quiz, tima!
[06:40] ---
    Please move to the area that
    you believe is the correct answer
[06:43] ---
    to the quiz questions we give you, tima!
[06:45] ---
    2-choice questions are a piece of cake!
[06:47] ---
    At any rate, we have to win this first...
[06:49] ---
    Question 1!
SIGN    Question 1
[06:50] ---
    Naturally, Ishikawa Station
    is in Ishikawa Prefecture.
[06:54] ---
    A trick question right off the bat!
[06:56] ---
    Or so they want us to think.
    They're testing how trusting we are.
[06:58] ---
    True, of course!
[07:00] ---
    This way! It's false!
[07:02] ---
    What?!
[07:03] ---
    I have a feeling it's true!
[07:04] ---
    Grr! Do as I say!
[07:08] ---
    The pair fighting over there,
[07:10] ---
    please hurry up and
    choose your answer, tima.
[07:12] ---
    Don't drag me down already!
[07:16] ---
    Question closed!
[07:17] ---
    The correct answer is...
[07:18] ---
    ...false!
[07:21] ---
    It is actually a station name
    in Aomori Prefecture!
[07:23] ---
    Pairs who got it wrong, goodbye, baby!
[07:26] ---
    See that?!
[07:27] ---
    If you've played the Momo-Tetsu game,
[07:29] ---
    it's an easy, common knowledge question!
[07:30] ---
    If you know the answer, say so first!
[07:33] ---
    Question 2. Between
    chimpanzees and giant pandas,
[07:35] ---
    the one who weighs less
    at birth is the giant panda.
[07:40] ---
    They say it's "giant" so
    the panda probably weighs more.
[07:42] ---
    False!
[07:44] ---
    This is true! No mistake about it!
[07:46] ---
    It's false! Don't get in my way!
[07:48] ---
    True! Just come with me!
[07:49] ---
    It's that pair again...
[07:51] ---
    I'm telling you it's true!
[07:53] ---
    Okay, and the correct answer is...
[07:55] ---
    ...true!
[07:56] ---
    Bye-bye to the false pairs!
[07:58] ---
    See? I told you.
[07:59] ---
    Giant panda babies are 15cm long,
    weighing just 90-130 grams.
[08:04] ---
    I saw it on Animal Planet.
[08:06] ---
    Then say so first!
SIGN    Question 3
[08:08] ---
    Question 3, a Japanese sake question.
[08:10] ---
    For delicious warm sake,
[08:12] ---
    the recommended temperature for
    perfectly warmed sake is 40 degrees Celsius!
[08:16] ---
    That's not a question
    for high school girls, tima.
[08:19] ---
    So what?
[08:20] ---
    Go call the agency
    if you've got a problem with it!
[08:22] ---
    Please don't, tima!
[08:23] ---
    No one's moving.
[08:25] ---
    Legally-speaking, sake's something
    high school girls don't deal with.
[08:28] ---
    Oh, yes, yes, I forgot to mention this,
[08:30] ---
    but every pair in this
    contest can use a lifeline!
[08:34] ---
    Oh, this is totally ripping off "Who Wants
    to be a Millionaire", right, tima?
SIGN    The temperature for perfectly
    warm sake is 40 degrees Celsius.
SIGN    True
SIGN    False
SIGN    Hell if I know
[08:37] ---
    There! There, there!
[08:39] ---
    That rule sounds so tacked on.
[08:42] ---
    However, you can only use one
    kind of lifeline just once, tima.
[08:45] ---
    Think carefully.
[08:48] ---
    Telephone!
[08:50] ---
    Ooh, the Sanzenin-Nishizawa pair
    has gone straight for the telephone!
[08:54] ---
    No willpower, tima.
[08:55] ---
    H-Huh?! Wh-What should I do?
[08:58] ---
    I'm suddenly being put on the spot?
[09:01] ---
    But I know the answer.
[09:03] ---
    The correct answer is...!
[09:04] ---
    Yes?
[09:06] ---
    The correct answer is false.
[09:07] ---
    Perfectly warmed sake
    is approximately 45 degrees Celsius.
[09:09] ---
    That's my Maria!
    I knew I could count on you!
[09:11] ---
    Incidentally, the temperature of sake
    is divided into 6 levels.
[09:14] ---
    Super hot, hot, perfect, lukewarm,
    skin temperature, and barely warm.
[09:16] ---
    What about my role?
[09:19] ---
    Okay, the correct answer is false!
[09:21] ---
    No one got it wrong! Darn!
[09:24] ---
    You saved us, Maria!
[09:26] ---
    Thank you!
[09:27] ---
    I wish you luck.
[09:29] ---
    So, on to Stage 2!
[09:31] ---
    Next up is the familiar scatter quiz!
[09:34] ---
    Questions will be scattered from above.
    Pick one up and answer it, tima!
[09:38] ---
    The time limit is 5 minutes.
[09:40] ---
    Just answer one question
    to move on to the next stage, tima!
[09:43] ---
    And now... GO!
[09:44] ---
    GO!
[09:46] ---
    All right, I'll go!
[09:48] ---
    What? That's okay. I'll do it.
[09:49] ---
    Shut up! You can do this!
[09:52] ---
    Oh, yeah, bubble popping!
    Once you get started, you can't stop.
[09:55] ---
    Wait, she's already gone!
[09:56] ---
    I'm just telling you to stay out of my way!
[09:59] ---
    Huh? What happened?
[10:01] ---
    I-I got a cramp in my leg.
[10:03] ---
    Oh, really!
[10:06] ---
    But running isn't really my thing.
SIGN    Nothing! Moron Moron
[10:09] ---
    Too bad, you got nothing, tima.
[10:10] ---
    What?!
[10:11] ---
    I mean, most of the envelopes have
    nothing, so do your best, tima.
[10:15] ---
    Oh, man.
[10:16] ---
    Get running. You have no endurance.
[10:19] ---
    Are you in any position to say that?!
[10:20] ---
    Just go!
[10:21] ---
    Yes, yes, yes.
SIGN    Nothing Moron!
[10:22] ---
    Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
[10:26] ---
    I-I think I might be done for...
[10:28] ---
    I am not giving up!
[10:29] ---
    Huh?
[10:30] ---
    For Hayate!
[10:31] ---
    Until I have my hands
    on that victory trophy!
[10:33] ---
    Though my leg may be cramping!
[10:35] ---
    You're right! Shabu-shabu with Hayate
    is waiting for me beyond this suffering!
[10:38] ---
    Still saying such impudent things?!
[10:40] ---
    Hayate likes shabu-shabu, too! I'm sure!
[10:43] ---
    Trophy!
[10:44] ---
    Shabu-shabu!
[10:45] ---
    One minute left, tima!
[10:46] ---
    Crap!
[10:49] ---
    Please!
[10:50] ---
    Okay. Nothing!
[10:51] ---
    I mean, here's your question.
[10:53] ---
    That's confusing!
[10:54] ---
    Now, here is your question. What's
    the minimum fare on the Yamanote Line?
[10:58] ---
    Um, two-thousand...
[11:00] ---
    Th-The current fare in 2008 is 130 yen.
[11:03] ---
    That is correct, tima!
[11:06] ---
    Piece of cake.
[11:08] ---
    Behold the latent power of the ordinary!
[11:10] ---
    And now, on to Stage 3!
[11:13] ---
    Locked room escape quiz, tima!
[11:16] ---
    If you can escape from
    that room within 3 minutes,
[11:18] ---
    you will gain the opportunity
    to answer the quiz question.
[11:21] ---
    Hmm, I suppose it wouldn't hurt
    to leave this to the commoner.
[11:26] ---
    Huh? It won't open!
[11:28] ---
    And the window, too!
[11:29] ---
    And the floor, too!
    None of it seems likely to open!
[11:34] ---
    As long as we can get out,
    I'm not picky about how we do it.
[11:36] ---
    That's the commoner.
[11:37] ---
    Well, I'll be escaping
    one step ahead of you...
[11:41] ---
    Huh?
[11:42] ---
    What?!
[11:43] ---
    A h-high rise?!
[11:48] ---
    20 seconds left!
[11:49] ---
    What'll we do? What'll we do?
[11:51] ---
    Key! Key! Was there a key somewhere?
[11:52] ---
    Good grief, you really are totally useless.
[11:53] ---
    I don't see one, I don't see one.
[11:54] ---
    What'll we do? What'll we do?
[11:54] ---
    Let's see, the typical escape methods
[11:57] ---
    for these Crimson Room-esque games are...
[11:59] ---
    First, you take this and do this...
[12:01] ---
    And you'd find something
    like this around here...
[12:03] ---
    And once you do this...
[12:04] ---
    You open this thing here and you get this...
[12:07] ---
    And when you do this with it...
[12:10] ---
    No way!
[12:12] ---
    Oh, it opened!
[12:14] ---
    You have successfully escaped, tima!
SIGN    Congratulations!
[12:16] ---
    Congratulations! And now,
    here is your question.
[12:17] ---
    You're kidding!
[12:18] ---
    What is the world's first video game console
    that was released in 1972?
[12:23] ---
    Um... "Brain Age..."
[12:27] ---
    It's the Odyssey!
[12:29] ---
    That is correct, tima!
[12:30] ---
    Next up, we are finally at the last stage!
[12:35] ---
    So you repaid the debt
    you owed me from Stage 2.
[12:39] ---
    In the end, it just means this
    is a piece of cake
[12:41] ---
    as long as we have my brains.
[12:43] ---
    When the last stage is over,
[12:45] ---
    will the goddess of victory
    bestow her smile upon them?
[12:48] ---
    Oh, Mr. Mikiri,
[12:49] ---
    you just sounded exactly like the narrator
    we always hear in the show, tima.
[12:53] ---
    Quit it with the "tima"s! It's annoying!
[12:55] ---
    And their triangle love with the butler!
[12:58] ---
    Will this bring a subtle change
    to their relationship? Or maybe not?
[13:01] ---
    For now, it'll be continued
    in the second half.
[13:03] ---
    Tima!
[13:06] ---
    The carotid artery. (Kei-doumyaku.)
[13:10] ---
    Even if you eat, don't go to sleep right away!
    (Kuttemo sugu neru na!)
[13:13] ---
    Do you all wanna go to New York?
[13:15] ---
    I do!
[13:16] ---
    Pay your own way.
[13:18] ---
    I ain't got money!
[13:19] ---
    Now, let's bring out our
    magnificent finalists, tima!
[13:23] ---
    Our first team...
[13:24] ---
    ...is these two!
[13:27] ---
    "We're friends who even
    take baths together."
[13:29] ---
    It's the Sanzenin-Nishizawa pair, tima!
[13:31] ---
    Don't introduce us like that!
[13:33] ---
    Who leaked that information?!
[13:36] ---
    And the second team!
[13:37] ---
    "We were originally supposed to have
    more scenes in the 3rd half-season."
[13:41] ---
    It's the Aika Kasumi-Chiharu Harukaze pair!
[13:44] ---
    Gack! The vice president
    and secretary of the student council?!
[13:47] ---
    It seems we have survived
    being eliminated somehow, Aika.
[13:50] ---
    So it seems, Chiharu.
[13:52] ---
    And finally, the third team.
[13:53] ---
    "We eat the strawberry
    first on our shortcakes
[13:55] ---
    "and the pickled bamboo
    shoots first on our ramen."
[13:57] ---
    You do?
[13:58] ---
    Well, something like that.
[13:59] ---
    The favorite to win! It's the Hinagiku
    Katsura-Miki Hanabishi pair!
[14:03] ---
    What?! Even Hinagiku was in this?!
[14:07] ---
    Hey, I came along because you asked me
    to help you choose a gift
[14:09] ---
    to celebrate your relative
    getting into school.
[14:12] ---
    What's going on here?
[14:13] ---
    Um, that is to say, the prize is the gift...
[14:17] ---
    As long as we have Hina,
    our victory is assured!
SIGN    Hina!
[14:20] ---
    Looks like we'll get
    some good footage again.
[14:22] ---
    Rah! Rah! Miss!
SIGN    Miss & Nishizawa
[14:26] ---
    Go for it! Go...
[14:27] ---
    I can't see!
[14:29] ---
    Pardon me. I'll be more careful.
[14:31] ---
    Okay, ignoring the cheering squad
[14:32] ---
    that's getting more attention
    than the participants...
[14:34] ---
    The final stage!
[14:36] ---
    Don't Slip Now, Speed Quiz Round, tima!
[14:42] ---
    Get an answer right
[14:43] ---
    and the slides will go up bit by bit
    for the other pairs, tima!
[14:46] ---
    The last pair to keep
    from sliding down will win, tima!
[14:49] ---
    Well, with Hina,
    I've got an army at my back...
[14:53] ---
    Oh, right, she's already
    out of it at this height...
[14:56] ---
    I-I'll be okay.
[14:58] ---
    A-As long as we stay at this height.
[15:00] ---
    We're going to answer
    every question, all right?
[15:03] ---
    No getting things wrong either,
    okay? Okay? Okay?
[15:05] ---
    This is a battle I absolutely cannot lose!
[15:09] ---
    We've come this far! We can't lose now!
[15:12] ---
    And now, Question 1!
SIGN    Question 1
[15:13] ---
    In Japanese, it's "I think, therefore I am".
[15:16] ---
    In Latin, that's...
[15:18] ---
    "Cogito ergo sum".
[15:20] ---
    Correct, tima!
[15:25] ---
    Next question!
[15:27] ---
    The true taste of coffee is...
[15:29] ---
    A barista.
[15:30] ---
    Correct!
[15:31] ---
    According to quantum theoretical thought...
[15:33] ---
    Schrödinger's cat.
[15:34] ---
    The Treaty of Mersen.
[15:35] ---
    The Sarashina Diary.
[15:36] ---
    The two-crop system. A theremin.
[15:37] ---
    A backward pivot throw.
[15:38] ---
    So strong! The Katsura-Hanabishi pair
    is overwhelmingly strong!
[15:42] ---
    You're doing good!
[15:43] ---
    You answer some, too.
[15:51] ---
    Aika...
[15:52] ---
    To be honest, I have
    about reached my limit...
[15:55] ---
    Y-You, too, Chiharu?
[15:56] ---
    Yes, then...
[15:58] ---
    Shall we fall soon...
[16:00] ---
    Oh, but she's gone already!
[16:02] ---
    In that case...
[16:03] ---
    ...I shall join her!
[16:04] ---
    The Kasumi-Haruka pair has dropped out.
[16:07] ---
    Meanwhile, the Sanzenin-Nishizawa pair
[16:08] ---
    also looks to be struggling
    quite a bit, tima!
[16:11] ---
    Th-The next one...
[16:12] ---
    We have to answer it!
[16:14] ---
    Question!
[16:15] ---
    Father's least favorite...
[16:16] ---
    It's mine!
[16:19] ---
    Papa-ya!
[16:20] ---
    Yes, but...
[16:22] ---
    Now, name four other tropical fruits.
[16:26] ---
    Kiwi, mango, pineapple, durian.
[16:28] ---
    Correct yet again, tima!
[16:30] ---
    This is bananas!
[16:32] ---
    Now, what will you do,
    Sanzenin-Nishizawa pair?
[16:34] ---
    They're at quite a nice angle, tima.
[16:36] ---
    You lose if either one of you fall, tima.
[16:39] ---
    Don't copy me!
[16:42] ---
    I think this might be my limit...
[16:44] ---
    Maybe. Maybe.
[16:47] ---
    This is nothing!
[16:49] ---
    For Hayate!
[16:51] ---
    I will win and get the trophy!
[16:53] ---
    Come to think of it, Little Nagi's
    been going on and on about the trophy...
SIGN    Can't show you!
[16:57] ---
    Oh, come to think of it,
    the trophy shown on the flier...
[17:01] ---
    ...might've looked somewhat like Hayate.
[17:04] ---
    Little Nagi...
[17:07] ---
    I've reached my limit!
[17:09] ---
    Hayate...
[17:15] ---
    What?!
[17:20] ---
    F-Fight it.
[17:23] ---
    You're going to win
    and get the trophy, right?
[17:27] ---
    Let's try hanging in there
    just a little longer.
[17:31] ---
    Hammy...
[17:33] ---
    With the two of us together,
    I'm sure we'll be invincible!
[17:38] ---
    Yes, I understand! Let's do our best!
[17:42] ---
    And now for the question!
[17:44] ---
    What kind of dumpling goes silent
    when you look at it?
[17:46] ---
    This is it!
[17:47] ---
    Me!
[17:48] ---
    Sanzenin-Nishizawa pair, go ahead.
[17:51] ---
    "Mitara shhh (if you look, shhh)"...
    So it's mitarashi dumplings!
[17:55] ---
    Correct!
[17:56] ---
    You did it!
[18:00] ---
    Among the episode titles for Japanese anime,
    what was the longest ever?
[18:04] ---
    Leave it to me!
[18:06] ---
    The 187 character long title
    for Episode 26 of "School Rumble".
[18:09] ---
    Correct, tima!
[18:11] ---
    That's my Little Nagi!
[18:12] ---
    A bronze statue!
[18:14] ---
    "Matango"!
[18:14] ---
    Sam!
[18:15] ---
    Color flashing!
[18:17] ---
    Impossible! I'm being put on the defensive?!
[18:20] ---
    Never mind that. How are they
    pressing the button in their position?
[18:22] ---
    That's all fine and good, but...
[18:24] ---
    I'm... just...
[18:27] ---
    Go for it! Call for it! Fine weather for it!
[18:27] ---
    Hang in there!
[18:30] ---
    Now, will the next one settle it?
[18:32] ---
    Koyuki's, the cake shop known
    for their ultimate seafood cake!
[18:35] ---
    How much does one
    of their cream puffs cost?!
[18:38] ---
    Me!
[18:39] ---
    You two are in no position
    to be able to push the button,
[18:41] ---
    but what is your answer?!
[18:42] ---
    Um...
[18:43] ---
    As I recall...
[18:53] ---
    200 yen a piece!
[19:02] ---
    Correct, tima!
[19:11] ---
    Well, that's about as far as we get.
[19:13] ---
    Adieu!
[19:17] ---
    Aww...
[19:18] ---
    That was one heck of a fall...
[19:20] ---
    The Katsura-Hanabishi pair has
    suffered an unexpected defeat, tima!
[19:23] ---
    And so, victory goes
    to the Sanzenin-Nishizawa pair.
[19:31] ---
    I'm surprised you remembered the price.
[19:33] ---
    Same to you.
[19:35] ---
    Well, you did well for a hamster.
[19:38] ---
    I guess you were pretty gutsy
    for a delicate rich girl.
[19:43] ---
    That's right! The trophy!
SIGN    Can't
    show you!
SIGN    Shabu-shabu All-You-Can-Eat Ticket
[19:53] ---
    What should I do with this?
[19:55] ---
    Maybe I'll go with my family, after all.
[19:57] ---
    Miss Nishizawa!
[20:00] ---
    H-Hayate...
[20:02] ---
    Really, congratulations on your victory!
[20:05] ---
    You fought magnificently out there!
[20:08] ---
    I think I might be a bit
    embarrassed to hear that.
[20:11] ---
    Th-Thank you.
[20:12] ---
    Not at all. I should be
    the one to thank you.
[20:15] ---
    Thank you so very much.
[20:18] ---
    I hope we can continue to work
    together in the future, Miss Nishizawa.
[20:32] ---
    Yeah, of course!
[20:35] ---
    Hayate, I guess it might
    still be a long way off
[20:38] ---
    before my feelings reach your heart.
[20:43] ---
    But even so, I can still...
[20:46] ---
    ...keep my gaze squarely
    on you like this, right?
[20:51] ---
    Right?
[20:51] ---
    What are you doing, Hayate?!
[20:54] ---
    We're leaving! We have to celebrate tonight!
[20:57] ---
    Yes, Miss.
[20:59] ---
    Oh, wait.
[21:00] ---
    What is it?
[21:01] ---
    If you've got something to say,
    make it quick, hamster.
[21:04] ---
    Hey, if you feel up to it,
[21:07] ---
    how about the three of us
    go eat shabu-shabu now?
[21:11] ---
    Or something like that...
[21:15] ---
    Miss.
[21:17] ---
    Yes!
[21:26] ---
    I swear, this meat is paper thin.
[21:28] ---
    It's shabu-shabu, so of course it's thin!
[21:30] ---
    What did you say?! I came
    because you asked me to come!
[21:34] ---
    What was that?!
[21:35] ---
    Now, now, I will skim
    all the scum off the top.
[21:39] ---
    Incidentally, shabu-shabu is very healthy
[21:42] ---
    and also great for middle-aged
    people living alone.
SIGN    Shabu-Shabu
[21:44] ---
    Next time, they will battle the 150
    million yen we'd totally forgotten about.
SIGN    Can't
    show you!
[21:48] ---
    More like, that was a lot
    of dialogue in this episode, huh?
[21:58] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:07] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:16] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:25] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:42] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:52] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:57] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:26] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:26] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report!
SIGN    Butler Report
[23:29] ---
    Try saying my name. I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:31] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:32] ---
    Time flies. This is already Episode 50
    of "Hayate the Combat Butler".
[23:34] ---
    The story is finally
    coming up on the climax!
[23:36] ---
    Will Hayate be able to defeat the Great
    Super-Dimensional Evil Butler General?!
[23:39] ---
    Um, we'll have to see about that...
[23:41] ---
    By the way, this song is your
    character song, isn't it, Miss?
[23:43] ---
    Yes. Actually, the next episode
    will be our last Butler Report.
[23:45] ---
    I must take the anchor position, after all.
[23:47] ---
    So, the fan service shot is of me, too.
[23:48] ---
    This is improper, Miss!
[23:50] ---
    Not to worry. For the next episode,
[23:51] ---
    we'll prepare a fan service shot
    of you bathing in a cross-dress outfit.
[23:53] ---
    What?!
[23:54] ---
    Well, see you!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
[23:57] ---
    What? Something important
    the Miss had ordered?
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[23:59] ---
    Yes. Might I ask you
    to go get it from the store?
[24:02] ---
    I understand. I will go right away.
[24:04] ---
    Don't be in such a hurry!
[24:05] ---
    Huh? Why?
[24:06] ---
    I just suddenly don't want to
    see your face anymore!
[24:09] ---
    What?!
[24:10] ---
    Mister Ayasaki, I would like to give you
    this gift of 150 million yen.
[24:14] ---
    I would like to poach you for my company.
[24:17] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler"...
[24:18] ---
    "Spring."
[24:18] ---
    Spring
[24:19] ---
    Don't be such a stranger, Hayate!
[24:21] ---
    I will protect the Miss!

51 - Spring

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:05] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:22] ---
    Mister Ayasaki, I would like to give
    you this gift of 150 million yen.
[00:28] ---
    What?
[00:36] ---
    Who is this mysterious man?!
[00:37] ---
    To be continued in the tense
    final episode next week!
[00:39] ---
    Hey, we just got started here!
[00:41] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[00:43] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[00:46] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[00:52] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[00:57] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[01:02] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[01:08] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[01:14] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[01:19] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[01:24] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[01:30] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[01:35] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[01:38] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[01:41] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[01:46] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[01:49] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[01:52] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[02:10] ---
    Spring
[02:18] ---
    *We now go back several hours from
    when the opening scene happened. *
[02:22] ---
    And now, all of you, rise!
[02:25] ---
    Listen well!
[02:26] ---
    Once again next year,
[02:28] ---
    you will turn S Ward of Tokyo an ever
    more shockingly brilliant white!
[02:32] ---
    Okay, now let's all sing
    the school anthem together!
[02:35] ---
    Yeah!
[02:39] ---
    The white school reigning
    over the land of Suginami
[02:40] ---
    This year has felt both
    long and short somehow.
[02:44] ---
    But I'm really glad I passed the year.
[02:47] ---
    Our mother school
[02:47] ---
    *That's right. Studying
    for the exams paid off *
[02:49] ---
    *and Hayate had more or
    less passed the finals. *
[02:50] ---
    Fire up that engine in your heart
SIGN    World History Answer Sheet
SIGN    Hayate Ayasaki
SIGN    More or Less Pass
SIGN    Butlers shall pass or they are bound for Hell!!
[02:56] ---
    Darn! Too bad.
[02:58] ---
    Tama, you may go.
[03:00] ---
    Um, Head Butler, enough with the bad jokes...
[03:03] ---
    I will remind you again, Ayasaki.
[03:06] ---
    The monetary amount you have managed
    to repay the Miss in this past year
[03:09] ---
    is still a paltry sum.
[03:12] ---
    If you were to fail out of school,
[03:14] ---
    you would once again find yourself out in
    the cold with your debt of 150 million.
[03:19] ---
    Be sure to keep that squarely in mind.
[03:22] ---
    Yes, Head Butler, sir!
[03:23] ---
    Hakuou! Hakuou!
[03:24] ---
    All right! I'll keep this up
    and do my best again next year!
[03:27] ---
    We're leaving, Hayate.
[03:27] ---
    Update blogs daily
[03:28] ---
    What?
[03:29] ---
    Hey, please wait, Miss!
[03:29] ---
    Hakuou Academy!
[03:35] ---
    Yes, we nailed it.
[03:37] ---
    Well, frankly, it's a pain. But my
    friends, we will meet again in April.
[03:41] ---
    The closing ceremony is now over!
[03:49] ---
    Come on, Hayate! Hurry, hurry!
[03:51] ---
    Keep dawdling and I'll leave you behind!
[03:53] ---
    Um, what are you in such a hurry for?
[03:55] ---
    We could bask in the aftermath
    a little longer...
[03:58] ---
    Not really interested.
[03:59] ---
    I want to hurry back to the residence
[04:01] ---
    and play the continuation of
    "Monster Hunter Portable 2nd G"!
[04:03] ---
    Huh?
[04:04] ---
    That's really all there is to it!
[04:07] ---
    Oh, please wait for me, Miss!
[04:13] ---
    I've got Hayate all confused!
[04:15] ---
    But I'm just getting
    started! My turn yet again!
[04:19] ---
    What? Something important
    the Miss had ordered?
[04:23] ---
    Yes. Might I ask you to
    go get it from the store?
[04:26] ---
    Under no circumstances are
    you to look at what it is!
[04:29] ---
    As you wish! Then I shall go right away!
[04:31] ---
    Don't be in such a hurry!
[04:33] ---
    T-Take some side trips
    and kill plenty of time.
[04:37] ---
    Specifically, wait until about early evening.
[04:39] ---
    Huh? Why?
[04:40] ---
    Wh-Why? Because...
[04:42] ---
    I-I just suddenly don't want
    to see your face anymore!
[04:46] ---
    Don't make me say any more than that!
[04:51] ---
    I understand.
[04:52] ---
    Then I shall take my time and return
    to the residence around early evening.
[05:00] ---
    N-Nagi!
[05:02] ---
    L-Looks like we managed to
    gloss over that somehow.
[05:04] ---
    Hayate will surely never even dream
[05:07] ---
    that he's being sent to pick
    up something like that!
[05:10] ---
    Nagi, don't you think that was a bit cruel?
[05:12] ---
    That's right!
[05:13] ---
    That butler-in-debt was awfully depressed!
[05:16] ---
    D-Don't look at me like that!
[05:19] ---
    Come on, everyone! Let's hurry
    up and start getting ready!
[05:22] ---
    *And so, Nagi's trap was quietly laid. *
[05:26] ---
    *Meanwhile, at Hakuou Academy... *
[05:32] ---
    *Yukiji's loud snoring
    could be heard, as usual. *
[05:33] ---
    What? No way! For real?!
[05:35] ---
    You want to pay 50 billion yen transfer
    fee for me instead of Matsui?
[05:40] ---
    *And Mr. Kaoru, whom we hadn't
    seen at all since Episode 18, *
[05:44] ---
    *was making Gundam models, the same as ever. *
[05:45] ---
    Is this a Guntank?
[05:47] ---
    *And furthermore, 10,000
    meters up in the air... *
[05:51] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha, it seems we will
    be arriving at our destination
[05:54] ---
    by lunch tomorrow, as planned.
[05:57] ---
    Good. I must obtain the
    rumored object at all costs.
[06:01] ---
    But what in the world is this legendary item?
[06:05] ---
    A mask made by an ancient conjurer.
[06:08] ---
    They say that if you wear it, a
    mysterious power makes you grow taller.
[06:12] ---
    What?
[06:13] ---
    Your smaller form is fine in its own way.
[06:15] ---
    But I would love to see your
    gallant form once again as well.
[06:19] ---
    Mistress Kuzuha!
[06:21] ---
    Sion.
[06:26] ---
    Africa, huh?
[06:28] ---
    But I hope she makes it back
    safely by the new term.
[06:32] ---
    Do you really mean that, Chiharu?
[06:35] ---
    You shouldn't say things like that.
[06:37] ---
    Even with the kind of person she is,
    the school still needs her talents.
[06:41] ---
    How specifically?
[06:42] ---
    In what way?
[06:43] ---
    Huh?
[06:45] ---
    Come on, let's go have tea somewhere.
[06:47] ---
    If you'd like, I'll treat you to some cake.
[06:49] ---
    With pleasure.
[06:50] ---
    Then, shall we three go for a quiet
    gathering to reward our hard work?
[06:56] ---
    *Come to think of it, I
    didn't get to see Hayate. *
[07:00] ---
    *It seemed like he made it
    safely to the next year, *
[07:02] ---
    *so I would've liked to
    properly congratulate him. *
[07:10] ---
    I wonder what this is.
[07:14] ---
    Considering the Miss's demeanor...
[07:16] ---
    I wonder if I messed up again somewhere.
[07:27] ---
    W-Wait, what are you doing?!
[07:28] ---
    Let me go!
[07:36] ---
    Welcome, Mister Ayasaki.
[07:38] ---
    Forgive the rough treatment.
[07:49] ---
    *Who are these people?! *
[07:50] ---
    *Could they be after the ordered item?! *
[07:58] ---
    Huh? "Victoria Elizabeth
    Steward Dispatch Company"?
[08:02] ---
    Indeed.
[08:04] ---
    We are the biggest butler dispatch
    company in the industry,
[08:06] ---
    making great strides on a global scale.
[08:10] ---
    I have never heard of such a thing!
[08:12] ---
    We have kept an eye on you for some
    time through a certain source.
[08:20] ---
    When did you get these?
[08:24] ---
    The videographers were...
[08:25] ---
    A one, two... us!
[08:29] ---
    Did you enjoy it?
[08:31] ---
    Hakuou Academy's Society for the
    Research of Video is for all eternity!
[08:37] ---
    So that's it...
[08:41] ---
    Mister Ayasaki, I would like to give
    you this gift of 150 million yen.
[08:46] ---
    What?
[08:48] ---
    *The story now finally goes
    back to the original scene. *
[08:52] ---
    I would very much like to
    poach you for our company.
[08:55] ---
    This is an advance payment.
[08:56] ---
    Please take it to repay your
    debt to the Sanzenin family.
[09:00] ---
    So you've even investigated about that?
[09:04] ---
    No, thank you!
[09:06] ---
    Since I have also promised the
    Miss that I will work and repay
[09:09] ---
    that money myself, without fail.
[09:11] ---
    Oh-ho. Are you certain? You may
    never get a chance like this again.
[09:17] ---
    If you truly have the
    Miss's interests at heart,
[09:20] ---
    should you not take this money to
    clear your debt with her immediately?
[09:26] ---
    As for that...
[09:27] ---
    Please contact us whenever you like.
[09:29] ---
    I look forward to a favorable response.
[09:48] ---
    All right! All right!
[09:51] ---
    All right! All right! All right!
[09:54] ---
    What is it, Tama? A little more to the right?
[09:58] ---
    Sheesh. Why do we have to help out, too?
[10:04] ---
    A-Are you all right, Isumi?!
[10:06] ---
    Whoops! I accidentally slipped, too!
[10:11] ---
    Whoa! Hey, Sakuya!
[10:12] ---
    Man, coincidences sure are frightenin'.
[10:14] ---
    Safety First
[10:15] ---
    A warm, youthful spring. To be
    continued in the second half.
[10:20] ---
    I'm Nagi!
    (Nagi da zoooo!)
[10:22] ---
    Miss, how much is really left of my debt?
    (Ojousama, hontou wa ato ikura desuka, boku no shakkin?)
[10:36] ---
    I may never get a chance
    like this again, huh?
[10:39] ---
    It's true. To remain forever at the
    Sanzenin residence like this is...
[10:44] ---
    It just may be my own selfish desire...
[10:48] ---
    Wait, this is no time to
    be thinking about this!
[10:50] ---
    Right now, I need to deliver this
    ordered item to the Miss first!
[10:56] ---
    What?!
[11:06] ---
    All right! It's perfect for sure this time!
[11:13] ---
    Oh, my.
[11:14] ---
    This is...
[11:16] ---
    Delicious, right?!
[11:18] ---
    Questionable.
[11:20] ---
    I would have to agree.
[11:21] ---
    It is not delicious, but it is
    also not entirely inedible...
[11:25] ---
    What the heck?! Darn it!
[11:27] ---
    And here I am, trying so hard!
[11:30] ---
    But Nagi, why have you undertaken
    such an elaborate celebration?
[11:34] ---
    Because this might be the
    only time we can do it.
[11:40] ---
    Hey, Maria, get me those Maximum Tomatoes!
[11:43] ---
    They've got the power to get rid
    of all exhaustion, after all!
[11:46] ---
    I want to make sure Hayate gets to eat them.
[11:48] ---
    Yes, yes.
[11:52] ---
    Man, I worked hard on my finals, too.
[11:56] ---
    Quit complainin' already.
[11:58] ---
    Ya studied for the exams with
    him, so congratulate him.
[12:02] ---
    Say, Sakuya.
[12:04] ---
    Thanks for letting me
    have your spot at Hakuou.
[12:08] ---
    I'd been meaning to say this someday.
[12:11] ---
    I-I'll make it up to you, I swear!
[12:14] ---
    Once I become a big shot!
[12:21] ---
    What're ya sayin'?! That's
    not like ya at all, ya wuss!
[12:26] ---
    Never ya mind that! Just
    accept it and be grateful!
[12:28] ---
    Sheesh, that butler-in-debt sure is late.
[12:31] ---
    Where is he and what's he doin'?
[12:33] ---
    Thanks for the food!
[12:35] ---
    Taiyaki Pastries
[12:38] ---
    There's no filling inside!
[12:40] ---
    Does this count as a kind of win?
[12:44] ---
    If it is, maybe I'll get
    to see Hayate or something.
[12:46] ---
    H-Hayate!
[12:49] ---
    Miss Nishizawa!
[12:51] ---
    Oh, could I borrow your bicycle?
[12:53] ---
    What?
[12:54] ---
    I will be sure to return it later.
[12:56] ---
    S-Sure!
[13:04] ---
    All right, I've caught up!
[13:08] ---
    Here goes, Eight!
[13:10] ---
    There!
[13:17] ---
    My dream was a message! I'm
    going to become a Major Leaguer!
[13:23] ---
    Young Master, this is it!
    This is how you do it!
[13:24] ---
    Yeah, I got it, Nonohara!
[13:26] ---
    Chashu ramen!
[13:31] ---
    The Young Sir won't be home today,
    so I'll have a simple dinner...
[13:37] ---
    I appreciate you putting
    up with me that one time.
[13:39] ---
    N-Not at all...
[13:40] ---
    Oh, um, this is the 100th unit
    in the Master Grade Series.
[13:44] ---
    I was totally expecting it to
    be a Guntank or the V or V2,
[13:48] ---
    so I just couldn't get excited
    about it until now...
[13:50] ---
    I see.
[13:51] ---
    Saki!
[13:53] ---
    Oh, Hayate.
[13:54] ---
    Pardon me. Did you see a small
    box around here somewhere?
[13:57] ---
    Pardon?
[13:59] ---
    Saki?!
[14:03] ---
    What's this?
[14:04] ---
    Oh, Hayata.
[14:06] ---
    Oh, you three! Please
    give that box back to me!
[14:10] ---
    So it's his.
[14:12] ---
    Then I guess it won't
    contain anything too good.
[14:15] ---
    All right, here goes!
[14:18] ---
    I got it!
[14:20] ---
    Oh, sorry!
[14:21] ---
    What?!
[14:27] ---
    Boohoo.
[14:29] ---
    I finally get to see Hayate, but
    I didn't get to talk to him much.
[14:33] ---
    Perfect timing, Miss Nishizawa.
    I am returning this to you.
[14:36] ---
    Thank you very much. It helped a lot.
[14:38] ---
    Excuse me now!
[14:42] ---
    Hayate...
[14:43] ---
    We'll meet again, right?
[14:45] ---
    Well, then, I look forward to
    working with you again next year.
[14:47] ---
    Yes, a job well done.
[14:50] ---
    If you are that happy about it, you should
    let it show on your face, Chiharu.
[14:56] ---
    H-Hayate?! What in the world happened?!
[14:59] ---
    Why did you come falling out of the sky?
[15:00] ---
    H-Hinagiku...
[15:01] ---
    The cake...
[15:02] ---
    Well, I was trying to leap to that
    building, but I missed my footing.
[15:05] ---
    My cake... My cake...
[15:07] ---
    It's smooshed flat now...
[15:08] ---
    Well, whatever.
[15:09] ---
    Um, Hayate, congratulations for
    making it to the next grade...
[15:12] ---
    Pardon me.
[15:13] ---
    I'm in a bit of a hurry, so
    I'll see you in the new term!
[15:16] ---
    My cake...
[15:18] ---
    He should be penalized for that.
[15:19] ---
    We must have him pay us back
    next time, plus reparations.
[15:23] ---
    What in the world was that about?!
[15:29] ---
    Wh-What is this?
[15:30] ---
    I haven't faced such an onslaught
    of unfortunate events in a while.
[15:33] ---
    It's almost as if I'm being tested somehow...
[15:36] ---
    This is bad. If I remember right,
    that's a flock of wild geese.
[15:39] ---
    As I recall, wild geese is the general term
    for large waterfowl in the Anatidae family
[15:42] ---
    of the Anseriformes order, but
    most of them come in the fall
[15:45] ---
    from Siberia to winter here and in the
    spring, they once again return north.
[15:47] ---
    At this rate, the Miss's precious
    ordered item is headed for Siberia!
[15:53] ---
    All right! It's all or nothing!
[16:18] ---
    H-Himuro, I can't wait!
[16:20] ---
    I'm going to learn the samba
    during spring vacation!
[16:24] ---
    Even now, you are already quite
    good at it, Little Master Taiga.
[16:35] ---
    Himuro, that box...
[16:36] ---
    Please return that box to me...
[16:39] ---
    Depending on the situation, I would
    have no problem with that, but...
[16:42] ---
    Are you all right with this?
[16:43] ---
    Huh?
[16:44] ---
    This ship is headed for Brazil.
[16:47] ---
    What?!
[16:49] ---
    Nooo!
[17:03] ---
    I just barely escaped being transported
    to the other side of the globe.
[17:08] ---
    But I can finally get this to the Miss...
[17:14] ---
    Hold it, Tama!
[17:16] ---
    Come on, follow me!
[17:18] ---
    Hold it!
[17:22] ---
    Now! Do it, Tama!
[17:24] ---
    What?
SIGN    Congratulations on advancing to the next grade!! Hayate Ayasaki!!
[17:32] ---
    Th-This is...
[17:34] ---
    Why don't you get yourself
    over there, Ayasaki?
[17:36] ---
    Everyone is waiting for you.
[17:42] ---
    Um, what is this...
[17:44] ---
    Yer more dense than I thought.
[17:46] ---
    Well, seeing you this surprised make
    the preparation worth it, though.
[17:50] ---
    But why the Arc de Triomphe?
[17:52] ---
    Where did you get the Arc de Triomphe?
[17:54] ---
    Nagi.
[17:55] ---
    Looks like it went well.
[17:57] ---
    Miss!
[17:59] ---
    Maria, bring it out.
[18:00] ---
    Yes, ma'am.
[18:03] ---
    Oh! Th-That's...
[18:05] ---
    Hayate, good work on the finals!
[18:08] ---
    This is just a token of my appreciation.
[18:10] ---
    What?!
[18:11] ---
    *In other words, it was all a
    surprise event planned by Nagi. *
[18:16] ---
    Hurry up and open the damn thing!
[18:17] ---
    Nagi came to us for advice, and
    we all picked it out together.
[18:21] ---
    I worked hard on the exams,
    too, but I got nothing!
[18:24] ---
    You better be grateful!
[18:26] ---
    Everyone...
[18:30] ---
    I cannot accept such a fine gift!
[18:32] ---
    What?!
[18:33] ---
    I mean, I owe you a debt of 150 million...
[18:37] ---
    On top of which, I have selfishly asked
    you to keep me on at the residence.
[18:42] ---
    Don't be such a stranger, Hayate!
[18:45] ---
    M-Miss...
[18:46] ---
    It's true, it'll take approximately 40
    more years for you to repay the debt.
[18:51] ---
    I know all that!
[18:53] ---
    That's why I chose that for your present.
[18:55] ---
    Because it's reputed to never
    break, even after 100 years.
[18:58] ---
    Miss...
[18:59] ---
    Hayate, I want to be with you forever.
[19:03] ---
    Not just for the 40 years,
    but for 100, even 200 years.
[19:07] ---
    Because what binds us together
    isn't just money anymore, is it?
[19:19] ---
    Miss!
[19:21] ---
    H-H-Hey, everyone's watching!
[19:24] ---
    But what ya said was way more embarrassin'.
[19:27] ---
    Ugh, for crying out loud!
[19:37] ---
    Is that so? That is really too bad.
[19:40] ---
    Then I shall wish you all the best.
[19:45] ---
    As you heard, he refused our company's offer.
[19:49] ---
    What shall we do?
[19:51] ---
    I suppose he passed, more or less.
[19:54] ---
    If he had responded to the headhunting,
[19:57] ---
    I was planning on driving him
    out of that mansion, but...
[20:00] ---
    For now, he's still worthy
    of holding onto that thing.
[20:05] ---
    Though, who knows how long that'll last.
[20:10] ---
    What do you think of that stew, Hayate?
[20:12] ---
    Uh, um, I suppose it is tasty in its own way.
[20:15] ---
    Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
[20:15] ---
    It's also ordinary in its own way.
[20:18] ---
    Ooh, but it kind of gets
    rid of that tired feeling!
[20:21] ---
    Replenished!
[20:22] ---
    I didn't work hard so you
    could feel replenished!
[20:25] ---
    What the hell?!
[20:31] ---
    Miss, please get up. It's morning.
[20:37] ---
    Last night was fun, wasn't it, Hayate?
[20:39] ---
    Yes, thank you very much, Miss.
[20:41] ---
    But so, it's spring vacation starting today.
[20:44] ---
    All right, Hayate, let's go
    view cherry blossoms today now.
[20:47] ---
    Pardon?
[20:48] ---
    F-For example, how about somewhere like this?
[20:50] ---
    Boating Dating Spots in Tokyo
[20:50] ---
    It's been a while, so I'd like
    to try a boat ride or something.
[20:54] ---
    *Spring is the season of wavering emotions! *
[20:57] ---
    *Today, for sure, Hayate and I will move
    our relationship into new territory! *
[21:01] ---
    Oh, I'm great with boats, you know.
[21:04] ---
    I actually once had a part-time
    job working at a boathouse.
[21:07] ---
    *Good grief. *
[21:08] ---
    *Even with a full turn of the seasons,
    nothing has changed with these two. *
[21:12] ---
    All right, let's go, Hayate!
[21:14] ---
    Now that's decided, time
    to get the bicycle ready!
[21:17] ---
    Yes, Miss!
SIGN    Can't show you!
[21:19] ---
    See you later.
[21:22] ---
    Then here we go, Miss.
[21:24] ---
    Yes, I am counting on you, Hayate.
[21:42] ---
    *And so, there is still
    much more to their story. *
[21:45] ---
    *Next time, they will battle the Aegean Sea. *
[21:57] ---
    Aisaretai fureraretetai
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[22:06] ---
    Motomeru bakari no kimochi wa
    The sense of continually seeking
[22:11] ---
    Hibi o kumoraseteta
    Used to darken my days
[22:16] ---
    Kimi ni deau sono hi made wa
    Until the day I met you
[22:25] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:34] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:42] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[22:48] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[22:52] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[22:56] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:25] ---
    This is Nagi...
[23:26] ---
    ...and Hayate's...
[23:27] ---
    Butler Report
     Final Episode
[23:27] ---
    Lettering by
    Ryoko Shiraishi
    Rie Kugimiya
[23:27] ---
    ...Butler Report, Final Episode!
[23:30] ---
    Good day, I'm Nagi Sanzenin.
[23:31] ---
    I am Hayate Ayasaki.
[23:32] ---
    And so, this is the final
    episode of the Butler Report.
[23:35] ---
    A lot has happened along the way.
[23:37] ---
    But you've certainly grown to
    become a fine butler, Hayate.
[23:39] ---
    Thank you very much, Miss.
[23:41] ---
    I think you have grown as well.
[23:43] ---
    D-Don't say stupid things like
    that! You have a dirty mind!
[23:45] ---
    What is the matter?
[23:46] ---
    This is what you get for
    saying things like that!
[23:48] ---
    Hayate as a maid to close things out!
[23:50] ---
    For the bonus segment of
    the next anime series,
[23:52] ---
    we've got to go with Hayate's Maid Report!
[23:53] ---
    So, see you again someday!
[23:55] ---
    Preview
SIGN    The next episode of
    "Hayate the Combat Butler" is...
[24:12] ---
    Next time on "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[24:14] ---
    final episode, "Radical Dreamers".
[24:16] ---
    Hayate, I'll be counting
    on you in the future, too.
[24:19] ---
    Yes, I look forward to it!
[24:21] ---
    

52 - Radical Dreamers

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] ---
    Because your echoing voice
    will stir up the wind
[00:04] ---
    When watching "Hayate the Combat Butler",
[00:06] ---
    make sure you keep the room bright
    and sit well away from the TV.
[00:13] ---
    Miss.
[00:16] ---
    Come on a date with me.
[00:24] ---
    April 30, 2008
[00:29] ---
    Night Duty Room – Hakuou Academy Noon
[00:33] ---
    What with it being Golden Week and
    all, the Academy sure is quiet.
[00:37] ---
    It's great that I got my own homeroom,
    but I need a pay raise to go with it.
[00:40] ---
    Man, what a drag!
[00:42] ---
    I can't even get into the
    mood to grade the tests!
[00:46] ---
    Well, guess I'll have a drink.
[00:48] ---
    Cheers!
[00:51] ---
    For Golden Week, ya gotta go to Hawaii!
[00:54] ---
    Gardens of the Saginomiya Residence 1:00pm
[01:02] ---
    What the heck?! I was puttin' up with
    the chill and buildin' up the mood here!
[01:06] ---
    Now, now, Nagi and the others are going
    to the Aegean Sea this year, after all.
[01:09] ---
    Why didn't ya go with 'em?
[01:11] ---
    Well, I felt I should not
    intrude on those two...
[01:14] ---
    Uh-huh, I suppose that makes sense.
[01:17] ---
    We're gonna get every volume of the
    shows the boss said he wanted to watch!
[01:17] ---
    Rental Video Tachibana 1:30pm
[01:20] ---
    Yes, sir!
[01:22] ---
    Wh-What do they want?
[01:23] ---
    The "Godfather" series maybe?
[01:25] ---
    Or "Battles Without Honor and Humanity"?
[01:27] ---
    If it's direct-to-video V-Cinema
    stuff, getting it all will be tough.
[01:31] ---
    Do you have all the for-rental
    videos of "Brave Exkaiser"?
[01:35] ---
    Half won't do.
[01:36] ---
    Huh?
[01:38] ---
    Is that all?
[01:40] ---
    We've got it.
[01:42] ---
    Then, what 'bout videos of
    "Superhuman-Machine Metalder"?
[01:45] ---
    We've got it!
[01:48] ---
    Yer good.
[01:49] ---
    If you want, we've got all
    of "Fight!! Ramenman", too.
[01:56] ---
    We'll be back.
[01:58] ---
    Sanzenin Residence 2:00pm
[02:01] ---
    So, the main stage today will be Mykonos
    Island, where the Miss is vacationing.
[02:06] ---
    Which means those of us stuck at
    home will have no more scenes.
[02:10] ---
    Well, a nice long break for
    once might not be so bad...
[02:13] ---
    I thought I just heard someone talking...
[02:14] ---
    Oh, crap.
[02:15] ---
    I must be hearing things.
[02:18] ---
    But what's a nice long break when
    it comes in the final episode?
[02:23] ---
    What?! For real?!
[02:26] ---
    I'm hearing things again.
[02:29] ---
    Zettai nante shinjinai!
     I don't believe in absolutes!
[02:32] ---
    Fukanou nante nai!
    No such thing as impossible!
[02:34] ---
    Mirai wa hiraku te no naka ni aru
     The future is in the open palm of my hands
[02:40] ---
    Honne o misecha make datoka
    Stuff like, showing your true feelings means defeat
[02:45] ---
    Dentaku hajiku jinsei datoka
     Or a life tapping away at a calculator
[02:51] ---
    Kokoro o itsuwaru kurai nara
     Rather than be false to myself like that
[02:56] ---
    Shichiten-battou baka-shoujiki mo kuuzen-zetsugo!
    I'll struggle to be uniquely naïve and honest!
[03:02] ---
    Komatta kao o mireba ki-ni-naru shi
     If I see a troubled look, I'll be concerned
[03:07] ---
    Jinsei isogu riyuu mo betsuni nai shi
    And it's not like I've got a reason to hurry through life
[03:12] ---
    Takara no chizu wa kimi ni azukeyou
    I'll entrust you with the treasure map
[03:18] ---
    Juuou-mujin yori-michi datte tsukiau yo!
    I'll even keep you company on your free-ranging detours
[03:24] ---
    Rakkii-sugiru tenkai
    A development that's way too lucky
[03:26] ---
    Kotae wa mayowanai
    I won't hesitate to give my answer
[03:29] ---
    Kantan sa! Subete wa kimi no tame ni
    It's easy! It's all for you
[03:34] ---
    Fuuhyou wa ki-ni-shinai
    I won't worry about the rumors
[03:37] ---
    Rettou-kan ni doujinai!
     I won't let a sense of inferiority get to me!
[03:40] ---
    Kakedasu shunkan wa ima koko ni aru
    The moment to start running is right here, right now
[03:59] ---
    Wow! So this is the Aegean Sea!
[04:02] ---
    Come, Miss, you hurry up, too!
[04:03] ---
    Mykonos Island, Greece
[04:08] ---
    Come to think of it, this is your
    first time on Mykonos, isn't it?
[04:11] ---
    Yes! I often used to go deep-sea
    fishing in the cold seas,
[04:15] ---
    so I've been to Iturup Island and
    those kinds of places, though.
[04:18] ---
    I'm surprised you didn't get arrested.
[04:21] ---
    Miss, the ocean is incredibly beautiful!
[04:24] ---
    The Clear Black LCD of the TV
    is beautiful, too, so I'm fine.
[04:28] ---
    When did the Miss become like that?
[04:31] ---
    Who knows? She has always been like that.
[04:34] ---
    Though, some of it really can't be helped.
[04:35] ---
    Isn't there anything we could do for her?
[04:41] ---
    Cappadocia, Turkey
[04:41] ---
    Wow, so this is Cappadocia!
[04:43] ---
    I think this is what they mean when
    they talk about magnificent views!
[04:47] ---
    Wow, so people used to
    live among those rocks.
[04:51] ---
    Hey, look, look, Hina, that sort
    of looks like a camel's hump.
[04:57] ---
    Wow, it really does look like a camel's hump!
[05:03] ---
    Huh?
[05:06] ---
    That's a real camel!
[05:08] ---
    Honestly! Enough with the jokes!
[05:11] ---
    Come enjoy the scenery from this
    high vantage point a little.
[05:15] ---
    I'm fine! I'm fine right here!
[05:16] ---
    Hina?
[05:17] ---
    You know I don't like high places, Ayumu!
[05:21] ---
    You say you don't like high places,
    but you were able to get on the plane.
[05:26] ---
    But I was totally asleep before we took off!
[05:30] ---
    I'm not getting up until we
    land, no matter what happens!
[05:33] ---
    Now that you mention it, you didn't
    have anything to eat on the flight.
[05:37] ---
    Even though it was 13 hours long...
[05:39] ---
    Anyway, scenery is something you
    enjoy from a lower altitude!
[05:43] ---
    Oh, you're hopeless.
[05:56] ---
    We came all the way here on vacation,
    but you don't seem very excited.
[05:59] ---
    There's no reason to get excited.
[06:02] ---
    Then let's go outside. Outside!
[06:04] ---
    You'll get more excited under the blue sky!
[06:08] ---
    It's hot.
[06:10] ---
    Then are you going to stay
    inside for the whole trip?
[06:13] ---
    Yeah.
[06:14] ---
    I see.
[06:16] ---
    There, there. We can go shopping
    together or something later.
[06:20] ---
    But, but, the Miss...
[06:23] ---
    Uh, that's not something I can change...
[06:25] ---
    It's fine. I'll stay here
    the whole time, too.
[06:28] ---
    Oh, dear...
[06:31] ---
    Oh, sheesh! Fine!
[06:33] ---
    Tomorrow, I'll go out in the morning for you!
[06:35] ---
    What?
[06:36] ---
    R-Really?!
[06:38] ---
    Yes. But just for a bit, all right?
[06:40] ---
    Just for a bit.
[06:42] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[06:46] ---
    I'm sorry you always have
    to go to such trouble.
[06:48] ---
    Not at all.
[06:49] ---
    Time flies. It's already
    a month into the new term.
[06:52] ---
    Please take care of Nagi for me.
[06:54] ---
    I will.
[06:56] ---
    And the Miss is becoming
    more used to the new class.
[07:00] ---
    I see.
[07:03] ---
    I would like for her to finally
    properly attend school this year.
[07:07] ---
    Y-Yes, well...
[07:28] ---
    The developmental technology
    for UFOs got sold!
[07:31] ---
    We're back!
[07:32] ---
    We're back.
[07:33] ---
    Welcome back! How was Cappadocia?
[07:36] ---
    It had long lashes, a split
    nose, and it spit on me.
[07:39] ---
    That was the real camel.
[07:41] ---
    Onto Greece tomorrow, huh?
[07:43] ---
    I'm looking forward to the Parthenon.
    It's a one-story building.
[07:46] ---
    But it's built on top of the Acropolis.
[07:49] ---
    But we'll be going to
    Mykonos Island after that.
[07:51] ---
    Yeah, Hayata and the others
    are there, too, right?
[07:53] ---
    What?
[07:54] ---
    What?
[08:02] ---
    Ooh, so this is Athens!
[08:05] ---
    This is incredible! You can see
    the whole city from the Parthenon!
[08:06] ---
    The Parthenon, Greece
[08:09] ---
    I think this view definitely
    deserves to be a World Heritage!
[08:13] ---
    Wait...
[08:14] ---
    Hina, why are you intently
    looking only at the temple?
[08:18] ---
    This temple is the World Heritage!
    The view has nothing to do with it!
[08:21] ---
    Sheesh, there you go again.
[08:23] ---
    You're missing out if you
    don't enjoy this view.
[08:25] ---
    I'm fine! I told you, I'm fine!
[08:27] ---
    Hina...
[08:28] ---
    I don't need to see views from high places!
[08:31] ---
    Where are Miki and the others
    anyway?! Where are they?!
[08:34] ---
    If it's sightseeing, you could
    just bring them instead.
[08:36] ---
    All three of them said they got tired of
    sights like this back in kindergarten.
[08:40] ---
    Those damn bourgeois girls...
[08:42] ---
    And they partied hard yesterday,
[08:44] ---
    so they asked to be left
    at the hotel to sleep
[08:46] ---
    until it's time to take the
    ship to Mykonos Island.
[08:51] ---
    As for that, you were
    partying hard, too, Ayumu.
[08:54] ---
    So why are you so energetic?
[08:56] ---
    Because this is my first trip with you.
[08:59] ---
    This is a trip to deepen
    our friendship, right?
[09:01] ---
    What?
[09:04] ---
    Why is it?
[09:06] ---
    For some reason, I always end
    up in high places with Ayumu.
[09:12] ---
    A-About Hayate?
[09:20] ---
    What's wrong?
[09:23] ---
    So? Where's the view good from?
[09:26] ---
    Huh?
[09:27] ---
    Oh, um... The view in this direction is...
[09:34] ---
    D-Don't let go of my hand! Don't let go!
[09:38] ---
    I won't.
[09:41] ---
    Wow!
[09:43] ---
    It's like we've come to a magical land, Miss.
[09:47] ---
    Well, it's true that this view
    hasn't changed in a long time.
[09:51] ---
    It's as if time has stopped for this town.
[09:53] ---
    What? Does that mean you've been here before?
[09:56] ---
    More like, we used to live here.
[09:58] ---
    Both Maria and I have spent
    more time abroad than in Japan.
[10:02] ---
    Though, no matter where we
    went, you were always shut-in.
[10:05] ---
    Shut up!
[10:06] ---
    But you really should stop being so withdrawn
[10:08] ---
    and become a child who plays
    under the sun as children should.
[10:11] ---
    What?
[10:14] ---
    Huh? I-Is something the matter?
[10:18] ---
    No, just thinking there was a guy who
    once said something like that, too.
[10:24] ---
    I don't even remember what he looked like,
[10:26] ---
    but he was a thief and a liar, and
    a guy who couldn't keep a promise.
[10:33] ---
    My hat...
[10:34] ---
    Please leave it to me, Miss!
[10:53] ---
    Here you are, Miss. As you
    can see, your hat is safe...
[11:09] ---
    Miss...?
[11:20] ---
    Um...
[11:30] ---
    Have you shrunk, Miss?
[11:34] ---
    What a thing to say to
    someone you've just met!
[11:37] ---
    I may not look it, but I am
    growing swiftly every day!
[11:40] ---
    P-Pardon me. I mistook you for someone else.
[11:43] ---
    I swear! Give that back!
[11:45] ---
    This is my hat!
[11:47] ---
    Y-You cannot take that!
[11:48] ---
    Because that hat belongs to Miss Nagi.
[11:51] ---
    So it is mine!
[11:54] ---
    So this hat belongs to me,
    Nagi Sanzenin, right?!
[12:00] ---
    What?!
[12:01] ---
    It can't be! This bitsy kid is Miss Nagi?!
[12:04] ---
    Don't call me bitsy!
[12:06] ---
    Which means... No... Just because
    anything can happen in this anime...
[12:10] ---
    Surely not!
[12:12] ---
    I've suddenly time traveled to the past?!
[12:15] ---
    No, no matter what, that can't possibly be!
[12:19] ---
    No, there's just no way!
[12:31] ---
    P-Please excuse me.
[12:32] ---
    What is today's date?
[12:35] ---
    Peperoncino?
[12:36] ---
    Neapolitan, spaghettino carbonara?
[12:38] ---
    Ack! He's a foreigner, so
    I can't understand him!
[12:41] ---
    So long, commoner.
[12:43] ---
    I am in a hurry. Do not make any
    more trouble for anyone else.
[12:46] ---
    Oh, wait!
[12:47] ---
    Please wait!
[12:48] ---
    What are you doing?! Are
    you a kidnapper, too?!
[12:50] ---
    I-I'm not! I'm no kidnapper...
[12:53] ---
    I swear! Let go!
[12:55] ---
    I swear, it's because of people like you...
[12:58] ---
    At any rate... At any rate, why
    did I travel into the past?
[13:01] ---
    If I can figure that out...
[13:03] ---
    This is why I do not want to go outside!
[13:05] ---
    What?!
[13:06] ---
    Oh! Miss!
[13:08] ---
    P-Please wait!
[13:10] ---
    Please wait, Miss.
[13:12] ---
    I need to switch up my thinking.
[13:14] ---
    If this is the past and this child
    is the Miss as a little girl...
[13:18] ---
    If I start now...
[13:19] ---
    If I start now, I can fix
    that super-indoor lifestyle!
[13:23] ---
    And if I do, she might
    be able to become a girl,
[13:25] ---
    who genuinely feels moved by
    the blue oceans and skies!
[13:28] ---
    Hey, commoner, what are you
    smirking about all on your own?
[13:32] ---
    I'll do it! It'll be fine!
[13:34] ---
    I know I can do it!
[13:35] ---
    I will use my abilities to change the Miss!
[13:38] ---
    So, Miss...
[13:40] ---
    Come on a date with me.
[13:47] ---
    Huh?
[13:48] ---
    In the end, a first class lady should be a
    child who plays under the sun as children should.
[13:52] ---
    So please come spend a little time with me.
[13:58] ---
    W-Well, I won't mind, but...
[14:01] ---
    Will you be all right?
[14:02] ---
    With what?
[14:03] ---
    Well, how to put it...
[14:09] ---
    I'm being targeted by Mafia
    kidnappers right now.
[14:21] ---
    What are you doing being targeted
    by bona fide Sicilian Mafia?!
[14:23] ---
    Easy for you to ask! It's
    a problem for me, too!
[14:37] ---
    Barbeque, hotcake, soft serve ice cream!
[14:37] ---
    "I've lost visual on target!"
[14:44] ---
    "Send the next assassin."
[14:44] ---
    Italian stallion.
[14:55] ---
    I swear...
[14:56] ---
    This is why I do not like going outside!
[15:00] ---
    I see!
[15:02] ---
    It's because she's had experiences
    like this since she was little...
[15:05] ---
    That's why she stays indoors like that.
[15:07] ---
    I know, Miss! Let us go to the
    ocean together to go stargazing!
[15:11] ---
    Huh?
[15:15] ---
    Fool.
[15:17] ---
    These things always happen to me.
[15:19] ---
    I do not wish to go outside.
[15:21] ---
    It'll be fine.
[15:22] ---
    In the past or the future,
    I will always protect you.
[15:27] ---
    So let us go together...
[15:28] ---
    Come with me to go stargazing.
[15:35] ---
    All right! Then it is a promise!
[15:40] ---
    It will be all right.
[15:42] ---
    How about we take those guys
    out before we go stargazing?
[15:50] ---
    Take those guys out?
[15:51] ---
    How in the world will you do that?
[15:53] ---
    You have nothing to worry about.
[15:56] ---
    Now, call the police!
[15:58] ---
    For all the cool posturing, you're
    awfully reliant on others.
[16:03] ---
    Pacific saury are cheap today!
[16:03] ---
    "Not so fast!"
[16:05] ---
    Miss!
[16:30] ---
    Ich liebe dich!
[16:30] ---
    "We're going after them!"
[16:31] ---
    Comment allez-vous!
[16:31] ---
    "They're not getting away!"
[16:36] ---
    It will be all right!
[16:39] ---
    I will protect you, without fail!
[17:07] ---
    "Where did they go?!"
[17:07] ---
    Lady Erika!
[17:08] ---
    "Find them!"
[17:08] ---
    Ebi-chan!
[17:09] ---
    Leah Dizon!
[17:09] ---
    "Don't let them get away!"
[17:11] ---
    You're pretty good.
[17:13] ---
    What?
[17:14] ---
    I have faith in you!
[17:16] ---
    Miss...
[17:18] ---
    Yes, Miss!
[17:21] ---
    "Prepare to meet your fate!"
[17:21] ---
    Cabaret club!
[17:23] ---
    I'm going to borrow this!
[17:32] ---
    Nabeshin, Nabeshin?!
[17:32] ---
    "Uh, where did they disappear to?!"
[17:54] ---
    Goddamn!
[17:54] ---
    "What has my life been..."
[18:29] ---
    It is all over, Miss.
[18:38] ---
    I am sorry.
[18:39] ---
    I have put holes in your precious hat.
[18:41] ---
    That's fine. It's a testament
    to how you protected me.
[18:45] ---
    If you had not saved me,
    I may have died here.
[18:51] ---
    Could it be... The reason I was
    summoned to the past was...
[18:55] ---
    Then, as promised, shall we do
    some stargazing here together?
[19:12] ---
    My hat...
[19:16] ---
    Call my name so that it reaches me
[19:25] ---
    Because your echoing voice
    will stir up the wind
[19:30] ---
    Liar...
[19:31] ---
    Liar
[19:33] ---
    Reach out that hand to hold mine
[19:38] ---
    It'll bring a smile to my face
[19:43] ---
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[19:44] ---
    Hayate!
[19:46] ---
    Miss?
[19:47] ---
    What happened? Where did you go?
[19:47] ---
    ...look at the present and start walking
[19:49] ---
    Both Maria and I have been
    worried for you all this time.
[19:52] ---
    And what are you doing here, Miss?
[19:54] ---
    Huh?
[19:55] ---
    Uh... W-Well, what does it matter?
[19:58] ---
    Liar
[19:58] ---
    I was just getting back at
    that idiot, who made me cry.
[20:04] ---
    At a brisk pace, all alone
[20:13] ---
    Without even noticing what color the sky was
[20:16] ---
    The time difference between Mykonos
    Island and Japan is minus 7 hours.
[20:17] ---
    I simply walked
[20:19] ---
    Right about now, they are probably gazing
    upon the beautiful starry sky of the Aegean Sea.
[20:22] ---
    I want to be loved, to feel that touch
[20:24] ---
    And yet, we alone must remain at home...
[20:28] ---
    Are you trying to comfort me, Tama?
[20:30] ---
    Well, thanks to that, I have
    this quality time with you now.
[20:31] ---
    The sense of continually seeking
[20:34] ---
    We have never gone stargazing
    just the two of us.
[20:35] ---
    Used to darken my days
[20:36] ---
    Not that I want to gaze up at
    Nerima's murky night sky with you.
[20:39] ---
    I see, I see, so you're lonely, too!
[20:41] ---
    Until the day I met you
[20:42] ---
    Aw, there, there! There, there!
[20:47] ---
    These children are my life. Just kidding...
[20:50] ---
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[20:54] ---
    What the heck? Yer still up?
[20:57] ---
    Yes.
[20:58] ---
    Do you suppose Hayate is also gazing upon
    the same starry night sky on Mykonos Island?
[20:59] ---
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[21:02] ---
    Maybe. But the sky over there's
    probably filled with more stars.
[21:06] ---
    Yes...
[21:07] ---
    When we start walking, the
    world will come to our side
[21:07] ---
    That is the constellation Boötes.
[21:09] ---
    Next to it is the Big Dipper.
[21:12] ---
    And beyond that is...
[21:13] ---
    Oh? There is a leak in the roof there.
[21:15] ---
    Darn it.
[21:16] ---
    Someday, I'll take you to see the
    starry night sky of the Aegean Sea.
[21:17] ---
    Morning will come
[21:19] ---
    And we'll feel the wind...
[21:21] ---
    Yes, I will be looking forward to it.
[21:25] ---
    What were you thinking about, Hina?
[21:27] ---
    Just wondering if Nagi and the others
    are looking at the same stars, too.
[21:31] ---
    I was, too!
[21:34] ---
    For you, I will remain by your side
[21:36] ---
    Oh, Nagi. She said she was going to look
    for Hayate and that was the last...
[21:41] ---
    All through the flowering season
[21:47] ---
    And for all time beyond that
[21:47] ---
    Goodness, the stars certainly are
    beautiful, aren't they, Miss?
[21:51] ---
    Going stargazing outside once
    in a while isn't so bad.
[21:52] ---
    It's my wish to stay with you
[21:59] ---
    Thank you... for protecting me.
[22:02] ---
    What?
[22:03] ---
    I mean...
[22:05] ---
    I'll be counting on you in the future, too.
[22:08] ---
    Yes, I look forward to it!
[22:19] ---
    Namae yonde boku ni todoku-youmi
    Call my name so that it reaches me
[22:28] ---
    Hibiku koe wa kaze o okosu kara
    Because your echoing voice will stir up the wind
[22:36] ---
    Daijoubu
    It'll be okay
[22:37] ---
    Namae yonde sora ni hibiku-youni
    Call my name so it echoes to the skies
[22:46] ---
    Mayoi-michi mo kitto futari nara
    Even lost, with the two of us, surely...
[22:54] ---
    Arukidasu toki sekai ga mikata ni kawaru
    When we start walking, the world will come to our side
[23:04] ---
    Asa ga kuru
    Morning will come
[23:07] ---
    Bokura wa kaze o kanjite...
    And we'll feel the wind...
[23:13] ---
    Tsunaida te to te hanasanai
    I won't let go of your hand
[23:18] ---
    Mamoritainda
    I want to protect you
[23:23] ---
    Saa ikou bokura wa
    Come on, let's go, we'll...
[23:27] ---
    Ima o mitsumete aruki-hajimeru
    ...look at the present and start walking
[23:41] ---
    
[23:55] ---
    See you!