# 17 - A Man Is Among Them!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYX0PN4MR/haganai)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:12] ---**
So... are you marrying Zaki's girl?
**[00:16] ---**
Me?!
**[00:17] ---**
Yeah. I just called him up,
**[00:20] ---**
and he started askin'
me about a wedding date!
**[00:24] ---**
He did sound kinda sloshed, though.
**[00:27] ---**
So, are you datin' Sena-*chan*?
**[00:29] ---**
O-Of course not!
**[00:31] ---**
Aw, bummer.
**[00:34] ---**
Do you at least have your
first girlfriend, then?
**[00:36] ---**
No.
**[00:38] ---**
A girlfriend, when I don't
even have a friend-friend...?
**[00:40] ---**
Huh? What did you say?
**[00:42] ---**
Oh, hey, Kobato got a boyfriend. She's
staying at his place again tonight.
**[00:46] ---**
*What*?! Who the hell is he?!
**[00:48] ---**
Who's the bastard who
made a move on my angel?!
**[00:50] ---**
He's gonna pay! I'm comin'
back to Japan right now!
**[00:52] ---**
I was kidding. Okay, bye.
**[00:54] ---**
Huh? Hey, wait a--
**[01:11] ---**
*Be My Friend*
**[01:12] ---**
*Shiranai furi shitatte*
**[01:15] ---**
*Be My Side*
**[01:16] ---**
*Zenbu kizuiteta yo*
**[01:18] ---**
*Mou ippo kimi no tonari ni ikou*
**[01:22] ---**
*Sono te ni datte todokisou sa*
**[01:30] ---**
"Haganai NEXT"
**[01:31] ---**
*Souzou ijou da ne jetto koosutaa na mainichi*
**[01:36] ---**
*Hisshi de mae wo muite itsumo kakenuketa n da*
**[01:44] ---**
*Zutto tsuzuki wa shinai ne bokura no jikan wa*
**[01:51] ---**
*Ima shika nai kara kono
shunkan kizamitsukeyou*
**[01:58] ---**
*Be My Friend*
**[01:59] ---**
*Shiranai furi shitatte*
**[02:01] ---**
*Be My Side*
**[02:02] ---**
*Zenbu kizuiteta yo*
**[02:04] ---**
*Mou ippo kimi no tonari ni ikou*
**[02:09] ---**
*Te wo toreru you ni*
**[02:11] ---**
*Be My Friend*
**[02:12] ---**
*Miagete bakari datte*
**[02:14] ---**
*Be My Side*
**[02:15] ---**
*Akogareteru ima mo*
**[02:18] ---**
*Mou ikkai nando demo te wo nobasou*
**[02:22] ---**
*Ano hoshi datte todokisou sa*
**[02:29] ---**
"A Man Is Among Them!"
**[02:31] ---**
Yo.
**[02:33] ---**
Ah, Kobato-*chan*'s here!
**[02:37] ---**
Bro...
**[02:38] ---**
Kobato-*chan,* want to go to an
amusement park with me tomorrow?
**[02:42] ---**
No!
**[02:42] ---**
Look, look, it's a ticket
to Yokoshima Wonderland!
**[02:47] ---**
Daddy got it from somebody
at work. And look at *this*!
**[02:50] ---**
There'll be limited-edition stuff there!
**[02:52] ---**
And I'll buy you snacks
and a tasty hamburger!
**[02:55] ---**
Limited edition stuff...
snacks... hamburgers!
**[02:59] ---**
Come on, Kobato-*chan*, don't be scared!
**[03:02] ---**
I'll be gentle! So have some
fun with your big sis! Okay?
**[03:07] ---**
How pathetic can you get?
**[03:10] ---**
Yokoshima Wonderland, eh?
**[03:10] ---**
Give it back, stupid Yozora!
**[03:12] ---**
Have you been there, Yozora?
**[03:14] ---**
My school did a fall field
trip there in eighth grade.
**[03:17] ---**
I spent the whole time
reading a book, though.
**[03:21] ---**
I-I see...
**[03:23] ---**
I've only been there with my family,
**[03:26] ---**
but an amusement park with
friends sounds nice, you know?
**[03:31] ---**
Y-Yes...
**[03:33] ---**
All right, tomorrow we're all going
to Yokoshima Wonderland together!
**[03:38] ---**
For real?!
**[03:39] ---**
School's out, so we've all got
time to kill anyway, right?
**[03:42] ---**
True.
**[03:43] ---**
And tomorrow is a weekday, so
it probably won't be crowded...
**[03:46] ---**
Rika wants to go too!
**[03:47] ---**
I shall accompany you, Aniki.
**[03:50] ---**
Yay! I'm going to the amusement park!
**[03:52] ---**
I'm going to Yokoshima
Wonderland with Big Brother!
**[03:52] ---**
I suppose I'll divert myself with
a human pastime, just this once.
**[03:57] ---**
Okay, it's decided.
**[03:59] ---**
Hold it! I only invited Kobato-*chan*!
**[04:03] ---**
This ticket admits six adults.
**[04:05] ---**
We're helping you make sure it's not wasted.
**[04:09] ---**
Wait, six adults?
**[04:11] ---**
Yay! Yay!
**[04:13] ---**
Huh? I can't go? Because I'm a little girl?
**[04:18] ---**
Because you're a little girl.
**[04:21] ---**
Oh. Yeah, I'm just a
little girl, after all...
**[04:25] ---**
Don't worry, I'm used to it.
**[04:33] ---**
I can shell out enough for one kid's ticket.
**[04:35] ---**
Really?!
**[04:37] ---**
Thanks, Sena! You're a good person!
**[04:44] ---**
Hey, Sena.
**[04:45] ---**
What?
**[04:46] ---**
Did you notice anything off
about the President yesterday?
**[04:51] ---**
Daddy?
**[04:52] ---**
Come to think of it, after
he gave me the park tickets,
**[04:55] ---**
he suddenly got all happy
and started drinking *sake*...
**[04:59] ---**
Why?
**[05:00] ---**
Beats me.
**[05:01] ---**
All I could think about
was inviting Kobato-*chan*,
**[05:03] ---**
so I don't really remember.
**[05:05] ---**
Oh.
**[05:07] ---**
Yeah, it must've just been drunken rambling.
**[05:10] ---**
Tomorrow will be great,
won't it, Kobato-*chan*?
**[05:13] ---**
No!
**[05:14] ---**
Oh, you're so cute!
**[05:22] ---**
Wow!
**[05:25] ---**
So this is the fabled "amusement park."
**[05:28] ---**
Huh...
**[05:30] ---**
It must be Sena's first time, too.
**[05:35] ---**
So, what ride should we go on fir--huh?
**[05:38] ---**
This one.
**[05:40] ---**
Black Dragon!
**[05:43] ---**
F-For real?!
**[05:44] ---**
You want to go straight to the
Black Dragon? Are you crazy?!
**[05:47] ---**
I swore to myself that I'd ride this!
**[05:49] ---**
J-Just so you know, I didn't stay up
all night deciding whether to ride it!
**[05:53] ---**
I just figured, since it's famous...
**[05:55] ---**
Just you wait, dragon of the night.
**[05:57] ---**
The Black Dragon...
**[05:59] ---**
That name seems fitting for a true man.
**[06:00] ---**
I wanna ride that one too!
**[06:04] ---**
Don't come crying to me later.
**[06:06] ---**
Let's go!
**[06:12] ---**
Quite slow, isn't it?
**[06:14] ---**
The ignorant masses down there
look like flecks of dirt.
**[06:21] ---**
What's the matter, dark dragon?
Is this all you've got?
**[06:26] ---**
Rika's being stimulated by the nice
vibrations, and she's starting to get a little hot!
**[06:39] ---**
Whoa--I'm not liking how high we are.
**[06:43] ---**
That's right, Black Dragon!
**[06:45] ---**
Lead me to the far reaches
of time and... and...
**[06:50] ---**
No, don't!
**[06:54] ---**
Th-Th-There's something so wrong
with whoever thought up this ride!
**[06:54] ---**
D-D-Do you think I'll let you
get away with doing this to me?!
**[06:58] ---**
You're just a hunk of steel!
**[06:58] ---**
Drop dead, you scum! Pervert!
**[07:00] ---**
A toy! I'll freaking kill you!
**[07:01] ---**
You lied to me again, Yozora!
I'm gonna die from this!
**[07:07] ---**
Stop, stop, go back!
**[07:07] ---**
W-Wait, stop, really, please stop! Please!
**[07:09] ---**
I'll kill you! I swear I'll kill you!
**[07:11] ---**
Here it comes...
**[07:14] ---**
I'm gonna die! You rotten apples!
**[07:17] ---**
Bro!
**[07:23] ---**
Fuck.
**[07:34] ---**
Too high too high too high *too high*!
**[07:34] ---**
Shit! Meat Meat Meat Meat
stupid Meat shitty Meat!
**[07:39] ---**
Stop saying poopy, you poopy woman! Bro!
**[07:39] ---**
Poopy poopy poopy poopy poopy poopy!
**[07:44] ---**
"Form itself is emptiness;
emptiness itself is form..."
**[07:47] ---**
Your face tells me just how bad you
want it, you planetary mass whore!
**[07:51] ---**
You look like a bitch in heat!
Universal gravitation streak of shit!
**[07:54] ---**
Kodaka! Kodaka, Kodaka, Kodaka, Kodaka!
**[07:54] ---**
Die die die! I swear I'll
curse you! Kodaka, help me!
**[07:58] ---**
Bro! Bro!
**[07:58] ---**
Poopy poopy poopy... Yay, high!
**[08:02] ---**
"...up to and including no
field of mind-consciousness..."
**[08:05] ---**
You better ejaculate faster
than the speed of light!
**[08:07] ---**
Rika's lost it!
**[08:07] ---**
A pig who can't transcend
might as well blow it!
**[08:17] ---**
H-How was it?
**[08:20] ---**
That was super fun!
**[08:23] ---**
Rika's head hurts. Can't remember...
Can't remember anything...
**[08:28] ---**
Ladies and gentlemen, may I
have your attention please.
**[08:31] ---**
There will be a *Fullmetal Necromancer
*skit at 10:45 on the event stage.
**[08:39] ---**
We hope to see you all there shortly.
**[08:42] ---**
Kobato-*chan*...
**[08:46] ---**
Want to go with me?
**[08:48] ---**
Yeah! Let's hurry, Bro!
**[08:52] ---**
Kobato-*chan*, wait!
**[08:57] ---**
Guess what, Kobato-*chan*? I just bought
all the *Fullmetal Necromancer* Blu-rays!
**[09:02] ---**
The truth is, I'm a huge fan!
**[09:05] ---**
Who's your favorite character?
**[09:08] ---**
Me, I like Mel-*chan* from season two best!
**[09:13] ---**
She's a one-off character, but--
**[09:14] ---**
Meryl.
**[09:15] ---**
Pardon?
**[09:16] ---**
Meryl. The phoenix tamer
from Season 2 Episode 8.
**[09:19] ---**
Emeraude Mireille von Livaraycia
Ohtori's nickname is "Meryl."
**[09:23] ---**
*Not* "Mel."
**[09:25] ---**
A-Ah, right, Meryl-*chan*.
**[09:28] ---**
And she came back in Episode 5 of Season 3!
**[09:31] ---**
Um, Kobato-*chan*...
**[09:33] ---**
Sena, she's a serious fanatic
when it comes to this show,
**[09:37] ---**
so if you don't know your stuff,
you'll only set her off more.
**[09:41] ---**
Kodaka, why don't real-world conversations
come with options and save points?!
**[09:47] ---**
Hi there, boys and girls!
Thanks for stopping by!
**[09:52] ---**
A really great friend came
here today for you guys!
**[09:56] ---**
That's right: it's Guernica-*chan
*from *Fullmetal Necromancer*!
**[10:02] ---**
Okay, let's all call her name together!
**[10:07] ---**
One, two--
**[10:11] ---**
My name is Astaroth! Guernica's
running late thanks to a trap I set!
**[10:18] ---**
I'm taking you hostage before she gets here.
**[10:22] ---**
Oh no! Help!
**[10:26] ---**
Now, would one of you kids come
be a hostage with this young lady?
**[10:31] ---**
There's a great free gift waiting for
whoever lets me take them hostage!
**[10:35] ---**
Can't ask for more than that...
**[10:38] ---**
Me!
**[10:39] ---**
Me, me! I'll be a hostage for you!
**[10:42] ---**
Wh-What are you doing?!
**[10:44] ---**
Don't worry, Kobato-*chan*,
**[10:47] ---**
I'll get the free gift for you, okay?
**[10:48] ---**
Hey, are you serious?
**[10:50] ---**
I don't care about a gift
from this stupid show.
**[10:50] ---**
Of course!
**[10:52] ---**
Er, we'd like to ask the mothers in
the crowd to let the kids go first.
**[10:56] ---**
Huh? "Mothers"?
**[11:00] ---**
Fine, then I'll take a child
in her mother's place!
**[11:04] ---**
What are they talking about?
**[11:04] ---**
Now, does anybody else want to be my hostage?
**[11:06] ---**
I think they're mistaking
you for Kobato's mother.
**[11:09] ---**
M-Me and Kobato-*chan*, mother and daughter?!
**[11:13] ---**
It looks like nobody's raising their hands!
**[11:13] ---**
Th-That would mean my husband...
is you... now wouldn't it?!
**[11:18] ---**
That's not even funny!
**[11:21] ---**
Yeah, well, I wouldn't like that either!
**[11:24] ---**
What's *that* supposed to mean?! Honestly...
**[11:27] ---**
There's a great free gift
waiting for the hostage!
**[11:27] ---**
Could I ask you to come over?
**[11:32] ---**
And I mean *really* great!
**[11:35] ---**
Kobato-*chan*?
**[11:37] ---**
Watch your step, okay?
**[12:15] ---**
"Guernica-*chan*♡" "Director - Masashi Kaido"
**[12:18] ---**
Pretty cool that you got the
director's autograph, huh?
**[12:20] ---**
Mm-hmm!
**[12:21] ---**
Guess you wouldn't have gotten that
if Sena hadn't raised her hand, huh?
**[12:27] ---**
Tha... tha...
**[12:29] ---**
Hmm?
**[12:31] ---**
Tha-Thank... you...
**[12:34] ---**
K-Kobato-*chan*!
**[12:39] ---**
Oh, Kobato-*chan*'s so cute
when she's feeling shy!
**[12:43] ---**
I want to thank you, too. Thanks.
**[12:46] ---**
I-I didn't do it for *you* or anything!
**[12:49] ---**
It was for Kobato-*chan.*
**[12:52] ---**
And anyway, what was with that
hag and the horse-head jerk?!
**[12:54] ---**
U-Us, married? I mean, sheesh...
**[12:58] ---**
Married... that's just dumb!
First you'd think "couple"...
**[13:02] ---**
What'd you say?
**[13:04] ---**
Nothing! Hmph!
**[13:13] ---**
So, what were you guys up to?
**[13:16] ---**
I sat on a bench and read my book.
**[13:18] ---**
Rika went on the merry-go-round ten times.
**[13:20] ---**
I ate a hot dog! And popcorn,
and a crêpe, and...
**[13:25] ---**
...what else, again?
**[13:25] ---**
I'm sorry you felt like you had
to buy so much food, Yukimura.
**[13:28] ---**
Nonsense, it was an honor to look
after your younger sister, Aniki.
**[13:34] ---**
Here you go.
**[13:36] ---**
Yay, curry!
**[13:38] ---**
Curry looks like p--
**[13:40] ---**
Your life depends on your next words.
**[13:43] ---**
Pretty tasty stuff.
**[13:45] ---**
Good.
**[13:50] ---**
Anyway, what do we do after lunch?
**[13:53] ---**
I want to go on the Black Dragon again!
**[13:57] ---**
I think we've had enough Black
Dragon for today. Right?
**[14:00] ---**
I-I'm completely up for another ride...
**[14:05] ---**
But I suppose we shouldn't
if you guys are scared!
**[14:08] ---**
Don't play tough, Meat. That
thing had you seconds from death.
**[14:11] ---**
Excuse me? *Your* knees were knocking.
**[14:14] ---**
N-No they weren't!
**[14:17] ---**
"Noooo!"
**[14:18] ---**
Your screams are perfectly
preserved in my memory.
**[14:22] ---**
You're the one who was crying!
**[14:24] ---**
N-Not only that, you peed
a little, didn't you!
**[14:27] ---**
H-How did you--
**[14:30] ---**
W-Wait, you really did?
**[14:33] ---**
Of course not! That lame coaster
didn't scare me one *bit*!
**[14:38] ---**
Then let's see you prove
it by going another round!
**[14:41] ---**
Bring it on! And you have
to ride too, obviously!
**[14:44] ---**
Because my camera's gonna get a
photo of the tears on your face!
**[14:49] ---**
Wait, did you bring a camera?
**[14:52] ---**
Oh yeah, hidden and ready.
**[14:55] ---**
Why bother hiding it?
**[14:56] ---**
Um... Why should that matter?
**[15:03] ---**
"Yokoshima Wonderland"
**[15:03] ---**
Big Brother, this way!
**[15:19] ---**
We're way up high!
**[15:22] ---**
The people look like flecks of dirt.
**[15:28] ---**
Man, the Black Dragon really *is* extreme.
**[15:33] ---**
Come to think of it, I wonder
what happened to Yozora and Sena.
**[15:37] ---**
It's been a long time since we split up.
**[15:39] ---**
Shall we meet up with them again?
**[15:46] ---**
Aniki.
**[15:48] ---**
We've found them.
**[15:58] ---**
My head hurts...
**[16:00] ---**
I feel sick.
**[16:01] ---**
Wh-What the heck happened?
**[16:03] ---**
We rode it.
**[16:05] ---**
Eight times.
**[16:06] ---**
You rode the Black Dragon *eight times*?!
**[16:08] ---**
Yozora wouldn't admit that she lost...
**[16:11] ---**
Meat wouldn't hurry up and die...
**[16:13] ---**
So who won, then?
**[16:15] ---**
The battle's still going.
**[16:18] ---**
Come on, it's time for the ninth round...
**[16:21] ---**
No, don't do it. You both
fought bravely, okay?
**[16:24] ---**
So let's just call it a tie.
**[16:26] ---**
Not happening!
**[16:27] ---**
Over my dead body.
**[16:29] ---**
I'll never let Yozora w--
**[16:29] ---**
I'll never let Meat w--
**[16:48] ---**
See you in the waiting room at 4:00, then.
**[16:51] ---**
"Men's Bath"
**[16:55] ---**
Maria, why are you coming to the men's side?
**[16:58] ---**
I don't wanna go with them.
They smell like vomit.
**[17:02] ---**
Oh. Well, I guess that's fair.
**[17:04] ---**
Yeah! I'm gonna take a bath with big brother!
**[17:13] ---**
Aniki.
**[17:15] ---**
I shall wash your back for you.
**[17:17] ---**
No, I'm fine! I'll do it myself!
**[17:21] ---**
I see I am useless to you...
In that case, I shall--
**[17:26] ---**
Okay, fine, you can wash it! Please wash it!
**[17:29] ---**
I hear and obey.
**[17:41] ---**
Hold on to your sanity, Kodaka! He's a dude!
**[17:47] ---**
So *this* is what a weenie looks like!
**[17:49] ---**
Bad girl. Give me back my towel.
**[17:53] ---**
Hey, how come you have
that weird thing on you?
**[17:56] ---**
"Weird"? All guys have these.
**[18:00] ---**
How come Yukimura doesn't have one, then?
**[18:05] ---**
Yukimura's a boy with no weenie! He's weird!
**[18:09] ---**
It's because I haven't matured enough.
**[18:11] ---**
Huh?!
**[18:12] ---**
So will you grow one when you're mature?
**[18:15] ---**
Yes. I shall work hard to be
a full-fledged man like Aniki.
**[18:20] ---**
I hope you get one soon!
**[18:23] ---**
What are you guys sayi--
**[18:32] ---**
It's not there...
**[18:36] ---**
Aniki... I'm embarrassed.
**[18:42] ---**
Y-Yeah... I guess a kid this cute...
**[18:46] ---**
couldn't be a... guy...
**[18:48] ---**
Which one next?
**[18:49] ---**
That one!
**[18:55] ---**
It's hard to believe that right away...
**[18:59] ---**
Excuse Rika for a moment.
**[19:03] ---**
Wait--Rika?!
**[19:15] ---**
My lord, there is no mistaking it!
**[19:17] ---**
This is a woman you see before you!
**[19:19] ---**
That's what I just told you...
**[19:22] ---**
Well, Rika has to check
these things personally.
**[19:25] ---**
Okay, now you convince Yukimura of it.
**[19:29] ---**
I didn't have any luck.
**[19:31] ---**
Rika doesn't like that you only
rely on her at times like this...
**[19:38] ---**
Yukimura*-ku*... er, -*san*... This way, please.
**[19:48] ---**
Really?
**[19:51] ---**
True, my body doesn't have one of those...
**[20:00] ---**
Aniki, I'm afraid I am
not a true Japanese man.
**[20:05] ---**
More like you're not a man, period.
**[20:09] ---**
Ack, wait! Don't cry, Yukimura!
**[20:12] ---**
I deeply apologize.
**[20:17] ---**
Say, why did you think you were a boy?
**[20:22] ---**
Family circumstances.
**[20:24] ---**
Oh...
**[20:27] ---**
Wait, that's the end of the explanation?!
**[20:30] ---**
Yes.
**[20:31] ---**
I'm amazed nobody figured it out before.
**[20:33] ---**
Apparently a few people have noticed
and pointed it out to her before,
**[20:37] ---**
but she says she paid them no mind.
**[20:39] ---**
I-I see...
**[20:40] ---**
I'm amazed Rika managed to bring her around.
**[20:43] ---**
Aniki...
**[20:45] ---**
Am I still your sworn brother,
even though I'm not a boy?
**[20:55] ---**
Obviously! You'll always be my brother.
**[21:01] ---**
Yes, Aniki. I shall always
remain your devoted servant.
**[21:07] ---**
What are you blushing for, Kodaka?
**[21:09] ---**
But oh dear, Yukimura's suddenly
starting to look really cute to me...
**[21:14] ---**
I might find her a little *moe*!
**[21:15] ---**
*Moe*?!
**[21:16] ---**
Sure--she's a pretty-girl maid!
**[21:18] ---**
Shit, how could I have been so careless?!
**[21:21] ---**
Here I thought he was just an oddball...
**[21:23] ---**
Hey... What's with you, Yozora?
**[21:25] ---**
She's cute and sweet *and* submissive!
**[21:28] ---**
And a maid who'll be his
servant on top of that?!
**[21:30] ---**
Give me a break!
**[21:36] ---**
I can't take it... I have no luck!
**[21:40] ---**
Why do things go so badly?!
**[21:58] ---**
They all look like normal cute
girls when they're asleep.
**[22:09] ---**
Aniki...
**[22:40] ---**
*Hikatta hazu no ano hoshi*
**[22:43] ---**
*Mayotta kumo ga jama shite mienaku naru*
**[22:48] ---**
*Nani wo shinjitara ii?*
**[22:53] ---**
*Fuantei sugiru sekai de*
**[22:56] ---**
*Sodatta takaramono kowashikaketeta*
**[23:02] ---**
*Nakusu no ga kowakute*
**[23:06] ---**
*Fujouri datte tameiki tsuki*
**[23:09] ---**
*Torikago de agaiteta hibi*
**[23:12] ---**
*Onaji sora wo miageteta n da bokura wa*
**[23:18] ---**
*Kimi no te wo nigitta toki
nigirikaeshite kureta ne*
**[23:25] ---**
*Tsunagatta kono te wa donna
hane yori tsuyoi n da*
**[23:31] ---**
*Tsubasa nante nakutatte
motto takaku toberu kara*
**[23:38] ---**
*Kitto ima nara daijoubu*
**[23:41] ---**
*Oozora kagayaku hoshi wo tsukamou*
**[23:51] ---**
I never imagined that I was a girl.
**[23:54] ---**
It's not uncommon for a pretty-boy
character to turn out to be a girl,
**[23:57] ---**
but this is the first time Rika's
seen the girl herself say that line.
**[24:00] ---**
Totally. Jeez, novelty isn't
necessarily a good thing, you know.
**[24:04] ---**
My apologies.
**[24:07] ---**
Next time: "That Kind
of Play Is Not Allowed..
**[24:09] ---**
and.. My Worldview Is Disturbed
When You Are Around"!
**[24:13] ---**
I wonder who the "you" refers to?
**[24:15] ---**
It's you.
**[24:15] ---**
A spoiler?!
**[24:17] ---**