E75 - “Don’t complain about your job at home, do it somewhere else”

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] Shinpachi
    GinTama the anime, year two, has reached the halfway point.
[00:04] Shinpachi
    From the next episode on, we're headed into the second half.
[00:06] Gintoki
    We somehow managed to avoid getting cancelled after half a year.
[00:08] Kagura
    Don't worry. Have the baby and the shotgun wedding will come.
[00:10] Gintoki
    No, no, it was because of our efforts to "boost up" the program.
[00:13] Shinpachi
    What're you talking about?!
[00:14] Shinpachi
    Thanks to us "boosting up" the program,
[00:15] Shinpachi
    we received angry complaints from all over that nearly put an end to the show!
[00:19] Gintoki
    Was that how it was?
[00:20] Gintoki
    Well, at any rate, it's always better to take things on rather than doing nothing.
[00:24] Gintoki
    We learned that from our pressure-free education.
[00:25] Kagura
    Right. You can't get hemorrhoids if you never enter the anus.
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of "Unless you enter the tiger's den, you cannot steal her cubs."]
[00:28] Shinpachi
    You've got that all wrong! It's "If you never enter the tiger's den"!
[00:29] Shinpachi
    What do you mean by "can't get hemorrhoids"?!  Who even wants that?!
[00:31] Gintoki
    Anyway, what we're trying to say is that GinTama will keep on truckin'!
[00:35] Kagura
    So then, what's today's story?
[00:37] Gintoki
    Gin-san's going to work really hard!
[00:39] Shinpachi
    Well, it seems we've already used up half the year's production budget...
[00:44] Kagura
    What?! Was it embezzled?!
[00:46] Kagura
    Or did they build a Greenpia, you bastards?!
SIGN    [Note: Many Greenpia health resorts were built in Japan as part of a huge government embezzlement scam.]
[00:47] Shinpachi
    We wouldn't build such a thing!
[00:49] Shinpachi
    The staff worked really hard and seems to have gone over budget.
[00:53] Gintoki
    Nothing we can do about that. We barely have enough production funds as it is.
[00:56] Kagura
    Give us a bigger budget, dammit.
[00:58] Gintoki
    Even half of what (beep) gets would be good, Sunrise.
SIGN    [Note: GUNDAM covered by "beep" sound. Sunrise Inc. is GinTama's production studio.]
[01:01] Shinpachi
    What're you saying in the midst of this mess? Who're you speaking for?
[01:04] Gintoki
    Didn't someone say, "Don't complain about your job at home, do it somewhere else"?
[01:08] Shinpachi
    I wouldn't know! But seriously, what're we going to do about today's broadcast?
[01:11] Gintoki
    Well, when the time comes,
[01:13] Gintoki
    we can patch together a recap episode and avoid the whole issue.
[01:15] Kagura
    If we include two or three new scenes, we can fool everyone.
[01:18] Shinpachi
    What's with this déjà vu idea?
[01:20] Shinpachi
    What's going to happen on today's GinTama?
[01:22] ---
    For now, let's cut to a commercial.
SIGN    [As it does every half season, today's GinTama special begins with only background info. The once every half-season background info only.]
SIGN    [What makes this a special? It's ??? special and XXX special.]
[03:39] Shinpachi
    It's such a great song, no matter how many times I hear it.
[03:41] Gintoki
    What was that?
[03:44] Shinpachi
    Otsu-chan's debut song, "Your Mother is Chome-Chome."
[03:47] Gintoki
    That's not what I meant.
[03:49] Kagura
    That wasn't the GinTama opening number.
[03:52] Shinpachi
    No, I think this song matches GinTama better.
[03:55] Kagura
    No, it doesn't, you pop idol otaku!
[03:58] Gintoki
    In the first place, the opening and closing songs are tie-ups with the sponsors,
[04:03] Gintoki
    so we'll be scolded if we change it on our own! Mu-san will be fired!
[04:07] Shinpachi
    Who's Mu-san? Okay, I get it. We'll do it the right way.
[04:11] Shinpachi
    Okay, once more, we'll play redballoon's "Gin Iro no Sora." Okay...
SIGN    [Note: Song title translated is "Silver-Colored Sky."]
[05:46] Opening Themeshinpachi
    Hey! There was something weird mixed in there! What's going on?!
[05:49] Prince Hata
    I'm not something weird. I'm Prince Hata.
[05:52] Kagura
    Why're you in there as if you're a part of the Odd Jobs family?
[05:57] Gintoki
    That's an insult to redballoon.
[06:00] Prince Hata
    No, the face of this show would have to be me.
[06:03] Prince Hata
    And the theme song should be "Love and Peace."
[06:06] Everyone
    What're you talking about?! Get lost!!
[06:11] Prince Hata
    That feels so good...
[06:12] Gintoki
    That was a terrible annoyance. Okay then, let's start again. Let's go!
[06:18] Shinpachi
    Celebrating us safely making it to the halfway point of year two!
[06:22] Kagura
    Lots of things happened during that time.
[06:24] Gintoki
    Don't call it a recap episode, or they'll take away our production funds!
SIGN    [Odd Jobs Gin]
[06:29] Everyone
    The GinTama Special begins now!
SIGN    [Someone said "Don't Complain About Your Job At Home, Do It Somewhere Else" So let me complain. It's already been a year since this anime, which began with, "Land of the Samurai. The days when our country was called that are long past." A lot of things have happened since then. So I thought, it might be a good to time to look back, but then someone said, "Tsk, a recap episode. Isn't that slacking?" Look, it's hard work putting together an anime, so stop complaining!]
[06:40] Shinpachi
    "Land of the Samurai." There was a time, long ago, when our country was called by that name.
[06:45] Gintoki
    Yes, that's how it was in the beginning.
[06:47] Kagura
    It brings back memories.
[06:49] Shinpachi
    Excuse me, I was reading the narration...
[06:52] Gintoki
    Hey, wait a minute. What is that? Notice how there aren't that many Amanto out on the streets lately?
[06:55] Kagura
    A lot of the original concept was forgotten.
[06:57] Shinpachi
    Stop chiming in like that. The scene's going to end...
[07:00] ---
    That was our city, Edo...
[07:05] Kagura
    Whoa, Shinpachi tripped.
[07:08] Gintoki
    He's a clumsy guy.
[07:09] Shinpachi
    No, it's not that kind of scene. It's the scene where I'm bullied by Amanto.
[07:14] Gintoki
    Wasn't this where you knocked down my parfait because of your clumsiness?
[07:18] Kagura
    That's right. That's why you're called Shinpachi.
[07:20] Shinpachi
    It's a fine name!
[07:22] Shinpachi
    Why're you embarrassing me in public!
[07:24] Shinpachi
    But because of that, we met each other.
[07:26] Gintoki
    What a waste...that parfait was.
[07:32] Gintoki
    There I am! I look great!
[07:34] Shinpachi
    Don't say that about yourself!
[07:36] Shinpachi
    But back then, you really did look cool, Gin-san.
[07:39] Shinpachi
    I never imagined you were such a hopeless guy.
[07:41] Amanto
    Who the hell are you?!
[07:43] Amanto
    Strapping on a wooden sword in the age of the Sword Ban!
[07:47] Gintoki
    Blah, blah, blah. Are you in heat or something?
[07:51] Gintoki
    Look at what happened to my chocolate parfait because of your fussing.
[07:57] Gintoki
    All of it spilled out!
[08:02] Kagura
    You seemed so charmingly naïve. The way you said your lines and such.
[08:05] Gintoki
    Kagura-chan, Kagura-chan, would you mind not talking like that?
[08:09] Gintoki
    You sound like my senpai pointing out all my faults.
[08:12] Shinpachi
    Gin-san, you're acting really cool here,
[08:15] Shinpachi
    but later, you laid the blame on me and ran off.
[08:18] Gintoki
    Well, so what. It's in the past now.
[08:20] Shinpachi
    What do you mean by "in the past"?
[08:22] Gintoki
    Don't let it bother you so much!
[08:23] Gintoki
    Didn't some Newtype say the same thing?
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of GUNDAM series.]
[08:25] Shinpachi
    ...but too focused, to be called a thug.
[08:27] Gintoki
    Tell your manager that it tasted great.
[08:32] Gintoki
    Look out!
[08:33] Kagura
    Oh! There I am!
[08:37] Gintoki
    Yeah.... At the time, I thought you were really dead.
[08:41] Gintoki
    I went looking for a time machine.
[08:43] Shinpachi
    Yeah, I remember. "Time machine...time machine."
[08:45] Shinpachi
    You were desperately looking for a time machine.
[08:48] Gintoki
    Right, right. This is it. The entranceway into the unknown.
[08:51] Shinpachi
    This adult should be ashamed of himself.
[08:55] Yakuza 1
    Wh-What's this?
[08:56] Yakuza 2
    What happened?!
[08:59] Kagura
    I like to fight.
[09:04] Kagura
    That is a Yato's true nature.
[09:06] Shinpachi
    Huh? Kagura-chan, Don't you think you looked more mature back then?
[09:09] Gintoki
    Now that you mention it, she seems to be regressing lately.
[09:13] Kagura
    What're you saying? A woman always wants to remain youthful.
[09:17] Gintoki
    You're not youthful-you're just a kid.
[09:20] Shinpachi
    Should we just drag on and on with commentary like this today?
[09:24] Gintoki
    What? Didn't you say we should reminisce?
[09:27] Kagura
    It's a lot of fun, and it's easy, too.
[09:29] Shinpachi
    Don't call it easy.
[09:30] Shinpachi
    But if we continue at this pace, it'll take quite a long time to cover a year-and-a-half.
[09:36] Gintoki
    Can't be helped. Then let's do a quick overview of the first year to a song.
[11:54] Shinpachi (M)
    We'll take the second half a lot more seriously!
[11:57] Kagura (M)
    We have an important announcement after the commercial!
[12:01] Gintoki (M)
    Stay tuned. Don't change that channel!
[12:04] Shinpachi
    But there isn't anything.
[12:07] Shinpachi
    Stop leading them on by saying there's an important announcement.
SIGN    [Encore: Sorachi's Musings 1]
[12:23] ---
    "Dreams are like trees. They're more fun to climb than to just gaze at."
[12:32] ---
    "There are things you'll learn only when you actually climb after them."
[12:36] Like
    Like: "I sweat a lot."
SIGN    [Encore: Sorachi's Musings 2]
[12:43] ---
    "Man, fountain pens are a pain to use.
[12:46] ---
    It's difficult to draw backgrounds and man, drawing manga is hard...
[12:52] ---
    Which means just living is a pain, too..."
[12:56] ---
    "I want to become a steamed cheese roll."
SIGN    [Preview]
SIGN    [Finally...for our eager fans...]
SIGN    [a movie version!]
SIGN    [That sword...]
[13:18] ---
    Damn, That sword...
SIGN    [Is said to drink human blood.]
[13:22] ---
    But I wasn't the one who killed him.
[13:24] ---
    Right, Benizakura?
SIGN    [GinTama The Movie - Benizakura Arc]
SIGN    [Gintoki in peril]
[13:38] ---
    Gin-san!!
SIGN    [They are called...]
[13:43] ---
    You think you can win against Matako Kijima quick-draw?
SIGN    [Kiheitai]
[13:46] ---
    I don't have a Lolita complex. I'm a feminist.
[13:49] ---
    What the hell kind of girl is she?!
SIGN    [Hurry, go now!]
[13:54] ---
    Elizabeth Senpai!
SIGN    [Shinsuke Takasugi returns]
[14:00] ---
    Don't ever call Gintoki my chum again.
[14:04] ---
    There're no warm feelings between us anymore.
[14:07] ---
    When did it all begin? When did our paths diverge?
SIGN    [They shared the same beginnings...]
[14:11] ---
    It's true that the two of us started in the same place.
[14:16] ---
    But even back then we were heading in different directions.
SIGN    [Original story by Hideaki Sorachi (serialized in Weekly Shonen Jump)]
SIGN    [The universe's dumbest samurai!]
[14:29] ---
    In the midst of an extreme fight to the death...
[14:32] ---
    have the memories of past battles lying dormant deep inside his body been awakened?
SIGN    [The excitement is reborn on the big screen!]
[14:41] ---
    So they're Gintoki Sakata and Kotaro Katsura...
[14:44] ---
    They're strong... I'd like to face them someday.
[14:50] ---
    Takasugi!
[14:53] ---
    We'll cut you down...with every ounce of our strength!
SIGN    [Opening March 2008 During Spring Break! Also showing: Ninth Grade Class Z Ginpachi Sensei]
[14:59] Shinpachi
    I told you, stop attracting viewers with a fake trailer!
[15:01] Shinpachi
    What if someone actually believed that?!
[15:03] Gintoki
    Sometimes there's truth in lies!
[15:06] Gintoki
    Maybe this will kick off an actual movie!
[15:10] Kagura
    One of those "re-edited movies" that Sunrise is known for.
[15:13] Kagura
    If we say there are scenes that weren't seen on TV, we can fool them.
[15:18] Shinpachi
    What good would fooling them do?!
[15:20] Shinpachi
    Next, we'll start with the scene in the Benizakura Arc
[15:23] Shinpachi
    where Kagura-chan meets Shinsuke Takasugi.
[15:27] Kagura
    Hey, are you a part of this ship's crew?
[15:32] ---
    Could you show me around?
[15:34] ---
    Unless you want me to make your head go pop.
[15:39] ---
    Hey, you hear me?
[15:42] Prince Hata
    There's a large moon out tonight.
[15:48] ---
    I thought moon Princess Kaguya might come down tonight...
[15:51] ---
    But Princess Tomboy showed up instead.
[15:57] Kagura
    This is bad. This guy smells dangerous.
[15:59] Everyone
    But...
[16:01] Everyone
    Why're you dubbing his voice?!
[16:05] Prince Hata
    Well, I wanted to do it just this once.
[16:09] Shinpachi
    Takasugi fans around the country are going to kill you!
[16:12] Kagura
    But didn't you think it was awfully funny?
[16:14] Gintoki
    Shall we do it on other scenes, too?
[16:16] Shinpachi
    What?! Are you serious?!
[16:18] Prince Hata
    Leave it to me.
[16:23] Gintoki
    Takasugi, are you the one who egged on the old man?
[16:26] Prince Hata
    Egged him on? Don't be ridiculous.
[16:29] Prince Hata
    His fangs were already showing. I just polished them.
[16:33] Prince Hata
    You see, I know the suffering that old man is going through.
[16:38] Prince Hata
    There still remains a black beast of vengeance inside of me, as well.
[16:43] ---
    Thrashing about all day and all night, saying in my ear:
[16:47] ---
    "Kill. Kill the enemies of my friends. Make them suffer the way we suffered."
[16:51] ---
    Gintoki, can't you hear those voices? No, I suppose you can't.
[17:01] Shinpachi
    They're going to kill you. They're definitely going to kill you.
[17:04] Prince Hata
    Love and Peace.
[17:06] ---
    It's Katsura.
[17:08] Katsura
    Amanto?!
[17:10] Prince Hata
    Zura, I've heard about you.
[17:12] Prince Hata
    That you and Gintoki beat up the Harusame.
[17:18] Prince Hata
    I was trying to link up with them to gain their backing.
[17:24] Prince Hata
    But thanks to you, I think it'll go well. When I present them with your head.
[17:29] Katsura
    Takasugi!
[17:30] Prince Hata
    I told you... I will destroy this rotten world.
[17:42] Shinpachi
    That's enough!
[17:45] Kagura
    But it was fun...
[17:46] Gintoki
    Okay, I'll join in, too.
[17:49] Gintoki
    That stuff's like juice.
[17:53] Gintoki
    Commit seppuku.
[17:56] Gintoki
    I'm also a Newtype!
[17:59] Kagura
    Wow! Let me try!
[18:01] Kagura
    Sakata-san.
[18:03] Shinpachi
    Then me, too.
[18:05] Shinpachi
    Boss, let's play badminton...
[18:08] ---
    What am I doing? I can't be doing this!
[18:10] ---
    Okay, now we'll move on to the Shinsengumi Arc.
[18:12] ---
    Watch it with Otsu-chan's song.
[18:15] ---
    Okay, then, listen to this song! "Chome-ko Nanza Kuso Kurae!"
[18:23] ---
    Toshi, I'm glad we invited her, after all. Neapolitan.
[18:26] ---
    Hell no! Rocky III "The Flames of Friendship"!
[20:40] Shinpachi
    And that's it. Did you enjoy today's GinTama?
[20:43] Kagura
    I'm really beat.
[20:45] Gintoki
    That was very GinTama-like, so I'm cool with it.
[20:47] Shinpachi
    After the closing theme,
[20:48] Shinpachi
    there's a preview of the Yagyu Arc that begins in the next episode.
[20:51] Shinpachi
    Don't miss it. Well then, we'll see you next week! Please watch!
[20:55] Kagura
    Bye!
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of DR. SLUMP. Ending phrase by Arale.]
[20:56] Gintoki
    I don't even know what'll happen two days from now.
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of Armored Trooper VOTOMS ending phrase.]
SIGN    [The name is...]
SIGN    [Kyubei Yagyu.]
[23:45] ---
    I am Kyubei Yagyu.
[23:48] Kondo
    Oh my god...
SIGN    [Otae's fiancé...]
[23:51] ---
    There's a huge gorilla in here!
SIGN    [suddently appears.]
[23:57] Kyubei
    I missed you...
[23:59] Kyubei
    Now it's your turn to keep your promise, Tae-chan.
[24:03] Otae
    Everyone... Farewell...
[24:09] Voice (Tojo)
    We are the guardians of the Yagyu family.
SIGN    [Yagyu versus Kodokan]
SIGN    [Itsuki Kitaoji]
[24:12] Kitaoji
    Itsuki Kitaoji.
SIGN    [Sui Minamito]
[24:14] Minamido
    Sui Minamido.
SIGN    [Tsukamu Nishino]
[24:16] Nishino
    Tsukamu Nishino.
SIGN    [Ayumu Tojo]
[24:18] Tojo
    And, Ayumu Tojo.
SIGN    [Can Gintoki and friends win against the Four Yagyu Aces?]
[24:21] Voice
    You face the Four Yagyu Aces, don't even think about leaving here alive.
SIGN    ["In Those Situations, Keep Quiet and Cook Red Rice With Beans"]
SIGN    [Otae and Kyubei made a promise as children.]
SIGN    [The "Yagyu Arc" begins, at last, in the next episode!]