# E337 - Wash Your Hands Before a Handshake
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/GR2P738KR/wash-your-hands-before-a-handshake)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Otsu**
*The broadcast law can go to hell*
**[00:09] Otsu**
*There's no turning back now*
**[00:16] Otsu**
*Go to hell!*
**[00:20] Otsu**
Everyone, thank you dingleberries!
**[00:23] Shin**
Dingleberries!
**[00:26] Otsu**
*Let's keep this show going anurarihyon!*
**[00:27] Gin**
What's with Otsu-chan lately?
**[00:29] Shin**
Nurarihyon!
**[00:29] Gin**
Hasn't she lost some steam?
**[00:32] Shin**
Not true!
**[00:33] Shin**
As always, any CD she releases
ranks high on the Edocon charts!
**[00:36] Gin**
Sure, but up-and-coming idols
are ranking even higher.
**[00:40] Gin**
Like EDO48 and NippleClo Z.
**[00:43] Gin**
Nowadays, group units are
more popular than solo acts.
**[00:47] Gin**
At this rate, Otsu-chan will lose popularity,
**[00:50] Gin**
fight with her agency over money,
**[00:53] Gin**
and as she fades from memory, re-debut
under some label like ****** or ********.
**[00:59] Shin**
Don't jinx her!
**[01:00] Shin**
The public eye always tends to wander,
**[01:02] Shin**
but only the real deal
will remain in the end!
**[01:04] Shin**
So Terakado Tsu will be the last woman
standing after this Warring Idols Era!
**[01:09] Gin**
Are you stupid? Idols are all just little brats
decked out in dreams and fantasies.
**[01:13] Gin**
There are no fakes or real deals among them.
**[01:16] Gin**
Sure, Otsu-chan is cute and a good singer.
**[01:19] Gin**
But if she stands alone on stage,
**[01:22] Gin**
the audience only gets a vague
idea of how good she is.
**[01:26] Gin**
But if you put her in a
group with five or six uggos,
**[01:29] Gin**
even an idiot could clearly recognize
how cute and how good she is.
**[01:33] Shin**
I don't know if you really need the uggos...
**[01:36] Shin**
But you're right. That's a
group's biggest advantage.
**[01:39] Gin**
Basically,
**[01:41] Gin**
she needs 47 uggos.
**[01:43] Shin**
What kind of 48 is that?!
**[01:45] Shin**
Are they re-enacting the *Chushingura*?!
**[01:47] Gin**
If that's not possible, she can
just go for the 48-position bingo.
**[01:51] Shin**
Why are we back to her
making a *Muteki* debut?!
**[01:53] Shin**
Anyway, a solo act may only go so far,
**[01:56] Shin**
but with some other members who
all make each other look good,
**[01:59] Shin**
Otsu-chan might hit even bigger heights.
**[02:01] Shin**
But where will she find idols who
can compete with her potential?
**[02:06] Sayo**
Otsu-chan really is cute.
**[02:09] Sayo**
I wonder how you become an idol.
**[02:11] Sayo**
I didn't really get it,
**[02:13] Sayo**
but Gin-chan said anyone can
get in by selling pillow talk.
**[02:17] Say**
Really? They sell pillows?
**[02:20] Kag**
Yup. Apparently, for most
idols, that's their main job.
**[02:24] Say**
They're selling pillows while
singing? That must be hard.
**[02:28] P**
You're wrong, miss.
**[02:31] P**
An idol's real job isn't
to sing or sell pillows.
**[02:38] P**
It's to sell dreams.
**[02:41] P**
If you don't mind, could you join us—no,
**[02:45] P**
join Terakado Tsu and
sell dreams together?
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** Wash Your Hands Before a Handshake
**[04:25] Shin**
What?!
**[04:27] Shin**
Kagura-chan, an idol?!
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[04:29] Shin**
And you want to make her
form a unit with Otsu-chan?!
**[04:31] Shin**
Why are you resorting to such crazy schemes?!
**[04:34] Shin**
And you call yourself the agency
that's backed her all this time?!
**[04:37] OMom**
It came as a surprise to me, too.
**[04:40] OMom**
I couldn't believe the scout brought in
**[04:42] OMom**
the girl from Odd Jobs, who'd
helped us out in the past.
**[04:45] Otsu**
But that's one of our scouts
for you. He has a keen eye.
**[04:48] Otsu**
I think Kagura-chan has all
the makings of a fine idol.
**[04:52] Otsu**
She's fair, has that foreign celeb thing going,
and you could even call her pretty.
**[04:57] Otsu**
And most of all, she looks
at home doing anything.
**[04:59] Shin**
Are there any idols who look
at home picking their noses?
**[05:03] Otsu**
Idols pick their noses, too. Even I—
**[05:05] Shin**
No, you don't! Boogers
don't exist for Otsu-chan!
**[05:09] Shin**
Her nostrils are filled with pink,
heart-shaped, sticky hopes and dreams!
**[05:13] Otsu**
Uh, I'm pretty sure boogers would be better.
**[05:16] OMom**
We're in the golden age of idol groups.
**[05:20] OMom**
If Otsu doesn't do something now,
she'll fall behind the times.
**[05:23] OMom**
So we came up with this plan...
***SIGN*** Would you like to sing beside Terakado Tsu?
**[05:25] OMom**
A plan to put her in a limited-time unit.
**[05:28] OMom**
We call it the "Your Partner
Is a ****er" Project.
***SIGN*** Your Partner Is a ****er
**[05:31] OMom**
While pairing Otsu with a mysterious no-name
to show a new, charming side of her,
**[05:37] OMom**
we'll unearth a new diamond in the rough
and market her in a package deal with Otsu.
**[05:41] Shin**
Unearth? Dig this mine all you want,
but all you'll find is boogers.
**[05:45] OMom**
They may be boogers now,
**[05:47] OMom**
but with polishing, they could
become boogers harder than diamond.
**[05:50] Shin**
But they'd still be boogers!
**[05:52] OMom**
Anyway, Otsu needs an out-of-the-box partner.
**[05:55] OMom**
Help us out.
**[05:56] Shin**
Please calm down!
**[05:58] Shin**
Do you want to waste all the
hard work she's put in so far?
**[06:01] Shin**
This girl isn't capable of being
an idol and selling dreams!
**[06:03] Shin**
If anything, she was created
to crush the dreams of men!
**[06:06] Shin**
A sad excuse for a Jump heroine!
**[06:10] OMom**
Wow! What was that?
**[06:11] Kag**
I let you talk, but you're
just running your mouth now.
**[06:14] Kag**
My boogers are already harder than diamonds.
**[06:17] Otsu**
She could use that in a hidden
talent contest for stars, Mom!
**[06:21] Otsu**
Do it one more time!
**[06:23] Gin**
Okay, that's enough.
**[06:26] Gin**
Let's start talking business now.
**[06:29] Gin**
She is our agency's main product.
**[06:32] Otsu**
Huh?
**[06:33] Otsu**
Agency? Product?
**[06:35] Gin**
Yes. She's an idol that we developed.
**[06:38] Gin**
For more than a decade since the anime began,
**[06:39] Gin**
she has held firm as the center
heroine and *Gintama's* idol.
**[06:43] Gin**
If we're talking potential, we believe
she far exceeds your Otsu-chan.
**[06:50] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[06:54] Gin**
So, President, we move forward
on this as a co-production?
**[06:58] OMom**
Yes, that's fine, Producer Sakata.
**[07:01] Shin**
Him, a producer? He's just a leech.
**[07:04] OMom**
It seems you weren't lying.
**[07:07] OMom**
Her rhythm and sharp movements...
**[07:09] OMom**
In terms of physical ability,
she far exceeds Otsu.
**[07:13] Gin**
Yeah.
**[07:14] Gin**
No idol in the entire universe
is a match for her on that front.
**[07:17] Gin**
Right, Trainer Shimura?
**[07:19] Shin**
Wait, I'm a trainer?
**[07:22] OMom**
Good looks *and* great performing ability...
**[07:24] OMom**
This may be the birth of a super idol.
**[07:26] OMom**
Right, Manager Shimura?
**[07:28] Shin**
Wait, am I a trainer or a manager? Pick one.
**[07:31] Gin**
The real question is how we market them.
**[07:35] OMom**
I'll let you handle that as the producer.
**[07:39] OMom**
If we're trying to give
Otsu a new kind of appeal,
**[07:42] OMom**
then we should change
how we produce her, too.
**[07:44] OMom**
You can handle it, right?
**[07:46] Gin**
No need to worry. We have an expert
in idol studies on our side.
**[07:50] Gin**
Right, Idol Nerd King?
**[07:51] Shin**
Sorry. Could you give me
a stable role already?
**[07:54] OMom**
Show me what you've got,
Sakata P and Shimura *****.
**[07:59] Shin**
In the end, I'm just a perv?!
**[08:03] Shin**
Hey, Gin-san!
**[08:04] Shin**
Can you really produce idols?
**[08:06] Gin**
As long as Otsu-chan is involved,
**[08:08] Gin**
this will make shitloads
of money, no matter what.
**[08:10] Gin**
We should make them feel as indebted
as possible and fleece them.
**[08:15] Shin**
But Otsu-chan now has that
massive booger stuck to her.
**[08:15] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[08:18] Gin**
What'd I tell you? a diamond shines extra
bright with boogers all around it.
**[08:19] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[08:22] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[08:27] Gin**
So, yeah, you'll be working as
Booger Diamonds 48 from today on.
**[08:33] Otsu**
Booger? Wait, that's our unit name, Producer?
**[08:37] Otsu**
I don't know about having "booger" in the name.
**[08:40] Kag**
She's right.
**[08:41] Kag**
As the diamond, I don't mind, but
put yourself in the booger's shoes.
**[08:45] Shin**
Uh, you're the booger here.
**[08:46] Gin**
It may sound Japanese, but "booger" means
"limitless possibilities" in Spanish.
**[08:50] Shin**
That's some impressive BS.
**[08:51] Gin**
It also means "children of B'z and WANDS."
**[08:54] Shin**
Why are you talking about B'z and
WANDS like they're husband and wife?
***SIGN*** A Man's Badge of Honor
**[08:57] Gin**
I wanna market you like the kid brother in
the Yokohama Ginbae. Like Shima Daisuke.
***SIGN*** A Man's Badge of Honor
**[09:02] Shin**
That's so old hat.
**[09:03] Gin**
Right now, we should use the agency's
pull to ride on all the coattails.
**[09:09] Gin**
We'll handle the approvals later.
**[09:10] Shin**
But this is going too far.
They're idols, you know?
**[09:13] Otsu**
I see.
**[09:15] Otsu**
But we should at least make
it a ladies' gang, Producer.
**[09:18] Shin**
That's not the issue here, Otsu-chan.
**[09:20] Kag**
Yeah, Sugimoto Tetta is cooler
than Daisuke, Producer!
**[09:24] Shin**
What do you think idols are?
**[09:26] Shin**
The Daisuke part was all you picked up on!
**[09:29] Gin**
How about this, then?
**[09:31] Gin**
A long time ago, in a galaxy far away,
**[09:34] Gin**
the great artists B'z and WANDS
gave birth to 48 children.
**[09:38] Shin**
Talk about grandiose!
**[09:41] Gin**
The children scattered across the universe.
**[09:43] Gin**
Among them, the twins that were number
48—the last of the children—
**[09:47] Gin**
descended on a planet called Earth...
**[09:49] Shin**
Ah, like how Yukorin said
she was from Planet Korin?
**[09:57] Gin**
...and made waves across the world.
**[09:59] Shin**
Nothing's changed!
**[10:01] Shin**
They just became Daisukerin in the end!
**[10:03] Gin**
Daisukerin was supposed to make waves
worldwide, and Booger Diamonds 48...
**[10:10] Bo**
...always supported him.
**[10:11] Shin**
Enough about Daisuke!
***SIGN*** A Man's Badge of Honor
**[10:12] Shin**
You two are the ones who need support!
**[10:15] Otsu**
But suit-wearing idols
might be a fresh concept.
**[10:18] Otsu**
Wearing pants will limit the fanservice,
but if we wear skirts instead
**[10:22] Otsu**
and have a chic backing band, it could
make for a cool and cute idol aesthetic.
**[10:27] Otsu**
Here we go with "A Woman's Badge of Honor"!
***SIGN*** A Woman's Badge of Honor
**[10:30] Shin**
Uh, the costumes are nice,
but what about the song?
**[10:32] Shin**
It's still stuck to the Daisuke thing.
**[10:34] Kag**
How about this, then?
**[10:36] Kag**
Here we go with "The Mark of a Woman," 'kay?
***SIGN*** The Mark of a Woman
**[10:40] Shin**
Uh, that sounds like something else entirely.
**[10:41] Gin**
This should do it, then.
***SIGN*** That Day of the Month
**[10:45] Shin**
What're you trying to make idols sing?!
**[10:47] Shin**
That's what "A Woman's
Badge of Honor" was about?
**[10:49] Shin**
That's what "The Mark of a Woman" meant?!
**[10:51] Gin**
Hey, don't jump to conclusions.
**[10:54] Gin**
By "that day of the month," we mean...
***SIGN*** That Day of the Month
**[10:57] Gin**
...that day when there's a lot of
Daisuke in the backing band.
**[10:59] Shin**
What kinda day is that?!
**[11:00] Shin**
You again? You came home with your
tail between your legs again?!
**[11:04] Shin**
What happened to going into politics?!
**[11:06] Gin**
Daisukerin made a comeback to
showbiz, and Booger Diamonds 48...
**[11:11] Bo**
...still supports him!
**[11:13] Shin**
Forget about Daisuke already!
**[11:16] Shin**
Anyway, why don't we look at the big picture?
**[11:20] Shin**
What kind of personalities
will they be playing?
**[11:23] Gin**
They're B'z and WANDS's children, right?
**[11:25] Gin**
They can just end every sentence with "zu."
**[11:27] Tamo**
Here are our guests for today.
**[11:29] Bo**
Hello. We are Booger Diamondzu 48zu.
**[11:33] Shin**
They sound like hicks. Sounds
like they're speaking a dialect.
**[11:35] Crowd**
Right.
**[11:37] Gin**
Then instead of "zu," let's go with "z."
***SIGN*** Zu
**[11:39] Tamo**
Cut your hair?
**[11:40] Kag**
I did, yezzz...
**[11:41] Shin**
She fell asleep!
**[11:43] Crowd**
Right.
**[11:44] Gin**
Forget "z," then. Let's go with "s."
**[11:46] Kag**
Lost your hair?
**[11:48] Shin**
She just became a sadist!
**[11:49] Crowd**
Right.
**[11:50] Gin**
Let's do this, then.
**[11:52] Kag**
It's time for a short break, I'll never
hurt you in all my love and selfishness.
**[11:57] Otsu**
Don't change the channel, let's rend this
moment with bullets from a rusty gun!
**[12:01] Shin**
Those verbal tics are too long!
**[12:02] Shin**
Why song titles as a verbal tic?
That's too much love and selfishness!
**[12:05] Shin**
Tamo-san will rust away
before they finish talking!
**[12:08] Gin**
Quit complaining when you
don't have any ideas.
**[12:11] Gin**
I can't work with you, let's break
up and I'll vanish from before you.
**[12:15] Shin**
Why's the producer using
Ohguro Maki song titles, too?
**[12:17] Gin**
This is a pain.
**[12:18] Gin**
Why don't we just have B'z and
WANDS be the backing bands?
**[12:21] Shin**
That'd just be a B'z and WANDS concert!
**[12:23] Shin**
They'd eat us alive!
**[12:25] Tae**
Shin-chan's right.
**[12:27] Tae**
You're on the right track with B'z and WANDS,
**[12:31] Tae**
but you're overlooking something
important, Producer Sakata.
**[12:35] Shin**
Sis?
**[12:37] Tae**
Sorry for barging in.
**[12:39] Tae**
I heard Kagura-chan was going to
debut, so I wanted to cheer her on.
**[12:43] Tae**
Here, I brought refreshments.
**[12:44] Kag**
Boss lady!
**[12:46] Tae**
I was just going to give you this and leave,
**[12:48] Tae**
but I couldn't let it slide.
**[12:50] Otsu**
Wow! What is this?
**[12:52] Tae**
Producer Sakata.
**[12:54] Tae**
You don't understand a thing.
**[12:56] Tae**
All you're thinking about is how to market,
how to make the audience happy.
**[12:59] Tae**
It's all about the audience.
**[13:02] Tae**
But the enemy isn't only in front of you.
**[13:05] Tae**
The real enemy lurks behind the girls.
**[13:09] Tae**
The backing band and backup dancers.
**[13:11] Tae**
Don't you know how many
idols they've gobbled up?
**[13:15] Shin**
What're you talking about?!
**[13:16] Tae**
Think back to Asa**** **** and Ham*** ******
**[13:20] Tae**
and how backup whatevers are always
taking idols from the back.
**[13:25] Shin**
Yes, it happens a lot, but so what?!
**[13:26] Tae**
They pretend to be on the idols' side,
**[13:29] Tae**
but they always target them
from the defenseless back,
**[13:33] Tae**
sharpening their nails to strike.
**[13:35] Tae**
And the moment the idol
gives them an opening...
**[13:37] BD**
Gotcha!
**[13:38] Shin**
That backup dancer is way too scary!
**[13:41] Tae**
In showbiz, the talent are products.
**[13:45] Tae**
Those in the business should never
ignore the fans and defile that product.
**[13:50] Shin**
Otsu-chan!
**[13:52] Shin**
Uh, an idol is about to die
thanks to your refreshments!
**[13:56] Tae**
And you men should be aware how
idols are expected to stay pure.
**[14:01] Tae**
Not putting careful thought into choosing
the backing band is simply preposterous.
**[14:05] Tae**
You must reconsider at once.
**[14:08] Gin**
Like you'd know anything, outsider.
**[14:10] Gin**
Who would you place at the back, then?
**[14:14] Kyu**
On guitar, Kyubei!
**[14:18] Tsu**
On b-bass, Tsukuyo!
**[14:21] Sac**
On drums, Sacchan!
**[14:24] Tae**
On castanets, Otae!
**[14:27] Tae**
Together, the four of us...
**[14:28] All**
...are Diamond Vacuum!
**[14:30] Shin**
You totally wanna eat Otsu-chan alive, too!
**[14:32] Shin**
Where'd you come from,
you brain-dead backing band?!
**[14:35] Sac**
What're you saying?
**[14:37] Sac**
We, Diamond Vacuum, had promised to make
our music debut long before you guys.
**[14:42] Kyu**
Our chance has finally arrived, Otae-chan.
**[14:44] Shin**
No chance in hell! Get outta here!
**[14:47] Tae**
We get it.
**[14:49] Tae**
We're okay with being the backing band.
**[14:51] Tae**
But please don't forget what I said about
an idol's enemies lurking behind her.
**[14:56] Gin**
What are you plotting?!
**[14:57] Gin**
And what do you mean,
"on castanets"? You're useless!
**[15:01] Tsu**
Hey, what's "bass"?
**[15:03] Tsu**
What, do I have to hit a ball
with this thing and run to base?
**[15:07] Gin**
Who brought this bum here?!
**[15:09] Shin**
Get out! All of you get out!
**[15:12] OMom**
*Producer Sakata is good.*
**[15:14] OMom**
*He's even got a backing band full of beauties.*
**[15:17] OMom**
*This is sure to spur Otsu on.*
**[15:21] OMom**
Otsu, if you slack off,
you really will be eaten alive.
**[15:25] OMom**
Do your best.
**[15:28] Otsu**
Who am I?
**[15:32] OMom**
Otsu!
***SIGN*** Debut Single
An Idol's Badge of Honor
**[15:50] S**
Looks like Terakado Tsu's making her move.
**[15:52] S**
Booger Diamonds 48, huh?
**[15:56] S**
I don't know where she found this
partner, but she's pretty cute.
**[16:01] S**
She truly looks boorish and uncultured,
**[16:05] S**
like the poster girl of a
diner out in the sticks.
**[16:08] S**
The perfect partner for her.
**[16:13] S**
She should've quietly
faded away as a solo act.
**[16:18] S**
Does she really think she can
beat us with this partner?
**[16:22] S**
Terakado Tsu and Booger Diamonds 48.
**[16:26] S**
I can't wait to see what a top
idol on Earth is like.
**[16:32] G**
Wh-What the hell is this?
**[16:34] G**
Otsu-chan is making a unit debut?
**[16:36] Taka**
This ain't funny! Who the
hell is this booger girl?
**[16:40] G**
We've always worshiped Otsu-chan
as the one true goddess!
**[16:43] G**
How dare they defile her
with this package deal?!
**[16:47] G**
As her fanclub, we will
never accept this unit!
**[16:50] G**
Yeah, yeah!
**[16:52] G**
This is bad.
**[16:54] G**
Let Captain Shimura know at once!
**[16:58] Kag**
Manager Shimura!
**[17:00] Otsu**
What're you doing over there?
**[17:02] Kag**
Idols are busy people! Get me my
sukonbu already, you rotten manager!
**[17:07] G**
Manager Shimura?
**[17:09] G**
Captain!
**[17:10] G**
And Otsu-chan, too!
**[17:12] G**
What's the meaning of this, Captain?!
**[17:14] G**
Surely you didn't make her do this...
**[17:16] Shin**
No, that's not it!
**[17:18] Shin**
Hey, wait up!
**[17:22] Shin**
Don't leave me behind!
***SIGN*** Studio Edo
**[17:26] Otsu**
*La la la, idol*
**[17:32] Kag**
* Accel, consul, it's dreams*
* that we sell, 'kay?*
**[17:38] Gin**
*Wait, time out.*
**[17:39] Gin**
Quit mixing in the 'kays, Kagura.
You're ruining the lyrics.
**[17:43] Gin**
Just forget about your character
and lay yourself bare.
**[17:47] Gin**
Try being plain old Kugimiya-san.
**[17:50] Shin**
Aw, the one place where I could shine...
**[17:54] Shin**
Producer Sakata, did you
see how the fans reacted?
**[17:57] Shin**
What now? Nobody wants this unit.
**[18:01] Gin**
Don't worry.
**[18:02] Gin**
I've got a huge event lined
up for the CD's release.
**[18:06] Gin**
The backing band's making
adjustments for it, too.
**[18:06] Tsu**
Why do I have to do this?
**[18:08] Gin**
As long as we create enough hype
by then, it won't be a problem.
**[18:11] Gin**
You fell in love with Otsu-chan when
you watched her street concerts, right?
**[18:16] Gin**
Real popularity is always built
up slowly and steadily like that.
**[18:20] Gin**
People who become fans overnight
also leave overnight.
**[18:23] Gin**
There are no shortcuts in
showbiz, Manager Shimura.
**[18:27] Shin**
That's true.
**[18:29] Gin**
I feel bad for Otsu-chan, but she'll
have to forget she's a top idol
***SIGN*** Pillow Talk Meet
***SIGN*** As long as you give us money, we'll sell you dreams, pillows, or whatever.
**[18:33] Gin**
and start over from sales.
***SIGN*** Pillow Talk Meet
**[18:37] Shin**
What's slow and steady about this?!
**[18:38] Shin**
What do you mean, pillow talk meet?
**[18:40] Shin**
What're you trying to make idols do?!
**[18:42] Gin**
It's basically a meet-and-greet.
**[18:44] Gin**
You know how "idols you can
meet" are all the rage?
**[18:47] Gin**
We'll go with "idols you can pillow talk."
**[18:49] Shin**
You can't call those idols!
**[18:51] Gin**
Relax. I know it says pillow talk,
***SIGN*** Otsu
**[18:54] Gin**
but this is just a meet-and-greet where
we sell expensive autographed pillows.
**[18:57] Shin**
That's basically a scam!
***SIGN*** Kagura
**[19:00] G**
Pillow talk with Otsu-chan!
**[19:03] Shin**
A whole horde of men showed
up with the wrong idea!
**[19:06] Gin**
Looks like it worked.
**[19:08] Shin**
Like hell! This is too risky!
**[19:10] Gin**
Meet-and-greets are always full of risks.
**[19:13] Gin**
All idol nerds touch their
d*cks before going to those.
**[19:17] Gin**
The idols and fans both get covered in d*ck.
**[19:19] Gin**
In the end, it just becomes
d*cks shaking hands with d*cks.
**[19:22] Shin**
What kind of risk are
you even talking about?!
**[19:23] Kag**
Ugh, are you serious? That's horrible.
**[19:26] Kag**
Make them disinfect before shaking hands.
**[19:28] Shin**
An idol with her hand covered
in boogers shouldn't talk!
**[19:31] Otsu**
It's okay. If this made me lose heart,
I'd never make it as an idol.
**[19:35] Gin**
That's a pro for you.
**[19:36] Gin**
Don't worry. We'll protect
you if anything happens.
**[19:40] Kag**
Promise?
**[19:42] Kag**
Come save us at once if
anyone dangerous shows up.
**[19:45] Shin**
The idol's more dangerous!
**[19:46] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:48] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:49] Shin**
Wait, wait, wait!
**[19:50] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:52] Shin**
Forget meet-and-greet! This has become
Hanayama Kaoru's Vice Grip Meet!
**[19:52] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:54] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:56] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:57] Kag**
Huh? I'm not supposed to
send them to the pillows?
**[20:00] Shin**
This isn't what pillow business means!
**[20:01] Shin**
They're all dying off before they
can reach Otsu-chan, their goal!
**[20:04] G**
Screw you! I came here 'cause I heard
I could pillow talk with Otsu-chan!
**[20:08] G**
We can't even shake her hand like this!
**[20:10] G**
Gimme back my money!
**[20:12] Shin**
This is bad, Producer Sakata!
**[20:14] Shin**
We won't get popular like
this! We'll get sued!
**[20:16] Gin**
Rest assured. All of this
was just a sideshow.
**[20:19] Gin**
The main event starts now.
***SIGN*** Otsu
***SIGN*** Kagura
**[20:21] Gin**
Anyone who buys a pillow
**[20:23] Gin**
will get a Booger Diamonds
48 lap pillow coupon!
**[20:28] Shin**
What do you think you're saying, Gin-san?
**[20:30] Gin**
What's wrong with lap pillows?
It's not like they lose anything.
**[20:33] Kag**
Yeah, sounds good.
**[20:35] Kag**
Take this.
**[20:35] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:37] Shin**
There's nothing good about this!
**[20:38] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:39] Shin**
Who asked you to use that
random martial art?!
**[20:40] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:41] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:42] Shin**
What the hell is a Lap Pillow
Punch? It's just a knee strike!
**[20:45] Kag**
I sleep better with a hard pillow.
**[20:48] Shin**
Nobody cares about your pillow preferences!
**[20:51] Shin**
I know you sleep like a log,
but that doesn't matter!
**[20:53] C**
Knock it off! We're not here
to visit some S&M club!
**[20:56] C**
You really call yourself idols?!
**[20:58] Shin**
Sakata P!
**[20:59] Gin**
That was a sideshow, too.
***SIGN*** Otsu
***SIGN*** Kagura
**[21:01] Gin**
Anyone who buys a pillow
**[21:03] Gin**
will get to sleep for a tiny bit with
Booger Diamonds 48 on that very pillow!
**[21:08] Kag**
Zzz...
**[21:10] Kag**
No, that's my Happy Turn!
**[21:14] Gin**
That was a sideshow, too!
**[21:16] Gin**
If you buy right here and now,
**[21:18] Gin**
you get a special price of 49,800 yen
and 4 bonus pillow storage boxes!
**[21:23] Shin**
Now you're just Suckerta
on the TV Shopping Network!
**[21:25] G**
What the hell is wrong with these guys?
**[21:27] G**
Screw this! Let's bounce!
**[21:29] Shin**
Hey, wait!
**[21:32] S**
Aw, the poor things. How could
you be so mean to your fans?
**[21:37] S**
To idols, the fans are gods.
**[21:40] S**
We would never let you look
so sad when you leave.
**[21:47] G**
That's...
**[21:47] S**
Why? Because...
**[21:51] S**
Tubular!
**[21:52] S**
We provide dreams to all of space
**[21:55] S**
as the special unit of galactic idols.
**[21:57] S**
That is why.
**[22:01] Shin**
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48?!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] Kag**
What's with these girls?
**[23:41] Kag**
I can't believe they can
say "tubular" when sober.
**[23:43] Kag**
We'll see if you can maintain that attitude
after you watch our meet-and-greet.
***SIGN*** Diamonds are Unscratchable
**[23:47] Kag**
Next time: "Diamonds are Unscratchable."
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:50] S**
They might not let us, even
if this is a late-night slot.
***SIGN*** We've already pulled all kinds of crap over the years.
***SIGN*** What can they possibly be planning to pull now?
***SIGN*** When GKB48 challenge them,
***SIGN*** how will BDZ48 respond?!