E264 - Liquor and Gasoline, Smiles and Tears

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Liquor and Gasoline, Smiles and Tears
[01:38] Shin
    You people throw the word 
    brother around too much!
[01:42] Gin
    Neither Gin-san nor I am interested
    in being brothers, you fool!
[01:47] Gin
    Shinpa—
[01:54] Obi
    Why would you come here
[01:58] Obi
    when it's already too late?!
[02:09] Shin
    Gin-san!
[02:13] Shin
    Gin-san, hang in there!
[02:16] Gin
    Idiot...
[02:18] Gin
    Why did you come?
[02:21] Shin
    Yamazaki-san told me everything.
[02:24] Shin
    That you guys were here...
[02:27] Shin
    That he wouldn't be returning...
[02:31] Gin
    Don't say that.
[02:33] Gin
    Who went and decided that it was over?
[02:37] Gin
    Stay out of this.
[02:39] Gin
    Th-That guy will be back.
[02:43] Gin
    I swear I'll bring him back to you.
[02:48] Gin
    So can you wait just a little longer?
[02:54] Gin
    It won't take much longer.
[02:57] Gin
    Really.
[02:59] Gin
    Please. I promise, okay?
[03:08] Gin
    Damn...
[03:13] Gin
    Damn...
[03:18] Shin
    It's okay.
[03:21] Shin
    You've done enough.
[03:23] Shin
    So Gin-san, don't disappear on us.
[03:28] Shin
    Even if Hajime-nii returns
[03:31] Shin
    and Earth is saved,
[03:34] Shin
    we won't be smiling if
    you're not with us.
[03:38] Shin
    It's okay if you don't
    act like a big brother.
[03:41] Shin
    It's okay if you're the total
    opposite of a role model.
[03:44] Shin
    It's okay if you aren't
    showing us the way to go.
[03:49] Shin
    As long as you're with us
    when we've lost our way...
[03:53] Shin
    As long as you're by our side,
    sharing the pain and sorrow...
[03:58] Shin
    As long as everybody's by
    our side, we'll be smiling.
[04:02] Shin
    No matter how difficult it may be.
[04:05] Gin
    Shinpachi...
[04:08] Shin
    So can you let us take it from here?
[04:11] Shin
    Don't worry.
[04:12] Shin
    I'm no longer the crybaby
    little brother of Obi Hajime,
[04:16] Shin
    nor am I a student of the
    School of Beam Saber.
[04:19] Shin
    I am the successor of the
    School of Tendo Mushin
[04:21] Shin
    and Odd Jobs' Shimura Shinpachi.
[04:24] Gin
    Wait, Shin—
[04:26] Kag
    Gin-chan!
[04:27] Kag
    Hold on, Gin-chan!
[04:29] Shin
    Kagura-chan...
[04:32] Shin
    Take care of Gin-san for me.
[04:34] Gin
    Didn't you hear me tell you to wait?
[04:52] Obi
    Are you insane?
[04:54] Obi
    You want to fight a man who completely
    destroyed your big brother?
[04:59] Shin
    You seem to be mistaken.
[05:01] Shin
    Gin-san didn't come here to kill you.
[05:04] Shin
    He came to save you.
[05:05] Shin
    If Gin-san had come to kill you,
[05:08] Shin
    you wouldn't be standing
    before me right now.
[05:10] Shin
    But it doesn't matter now.
[05:12] Shin
    I'll get Hajime-nii back
    even if I have to kill you,
[05:16] Shin
    no matter how much
    pain it may cause me.
[05:20] Obi
    If you go through life with the blood
    of your benefactor on your hands,
[05:25] Obi
    you won't be the only one
    who suffers as a result.
[05:27] Otae
    I, Shimura Tae, will be the
    witness for this battle.
[05:34] Otae
    The School of Tendo Mushin
    and the School of Beam Saber
[05:37] ---
    in a no-holds-barred duel.
[05:39] Otae
    Fight as true warriors to the very end.
[05:42] Kag
    Boss lady...
[05:44] Otae
    Please watch us, Obi-one-niisama.
[05:48] Otae
    The crybaby who always
    followed you around
[05:52] Otae
    and all of us who always
    admired your strength
[05:56] Otae
    have become much stronger
[06:00] ---
    after meeting you and everyone else.
[06:03] Otae
    Strong enough to stop you.
[06:06] Otae
    Begin now!
[06:14] Shin
    Hajime-nii!
[06:25] Obi
    Come, Shin-bo!
[06:51] Obi
    I have seen the future of
    the School of Tendo Mushin.
[06:57] Obi
    You've become so strong,
    Shin-bo, Otae-chan...
[07:21] Otae
    Point.
[07:25] A
    We've lost contact with Kenofi?
[07:28] A
    Impossible, he's the
    Galaxy Sword Master.
[07:31] B
    Curses!
[07:32] ---
    Do you have any idea how much money
[07:34] ---
    we poured into making that thing?!
[07:36] B
    It was a mistake to rely on a native
    monkey to carry out this mission!
[07:41] B
    How dare he die before
    he could be of any use?!
[07:44] B
    No matter what you spend on it, junk is—
[07:46] Kon
    Shut up.
[07:47] Kon
    Keep that filthy mouth of yours shut.
[07:50] Kon
    He's not a piece of junk.
[07:52] Kon
    And he's not a weapon.
[07:54] Kon
    At long last, he's finally made it home.
[07:58] Kon
    The samurai is back in the
    country of the samurai.
[08:01] Kon
    No more will you toy with
    human lives and emotions!
[08:06] Kon
    We will make you pay!
[08:09] Kon
    Apprehend them!
[08:11] Kon
    What?!
[08:12] A
    Too bad for you, monkeys.
[08:16] Obi
    That was an excellent strike.
[08:19] Obi
    Shin-bo, you've come a long way.
[08:23] Obi
    I'm very happy.
[08:26] Shin
    You've always been a liar.
[08:27] Shin
    And that hasn't changed.
[08:30] Shin
    You always gave in to my persistence,
[08:33] Shin
    and let me win once while
    saying that I'd gotten stronger.
[08:37] Shin
    You were always joking around.
[08:41] Obi
    I was serious this time.
[08:44] Obi
    Your voices pierced through
    this cold metal body.
[08:48] Obi
    Your voice,
[08:51] ---
    Otae-chan's voice,
[08:53] ---
    Instructor Sakata's voice...
[08:57] Obi
    Your voices summoned my soul
    from this lump of metal.
[09:02] Obi
    Which is why I was able to beat
    my other half at the very end.
[09:09] Obi
    I couldn't match up to the rest of you,
[09:12] Obi
    but for a moment, I think I
    knew what true strength was.
[09:16] Obi
    I can finally come home
    without feeling ashamed.
[09:22] Obi
    Truly, thank you very hamnida.
[09:25] Kag
    You shouldn't leave, then.
[09:28] Kag
    Stay here forever.
[09:30] Kag
    We can all play with beam
    sabers together again.
[09:34] Kag
    I'll do a better job of preparing
    your bath this time.
[09:37] Kag
    So...
[09:39] Kag
    Don't talk like this is the end.
[09:42] Kag
    Don't leave Shinpachi and
    the boss lady alone.
[09:49] Obi
    Don't worry.
[09:51] Obi
    I just left something up in space.
[09:59] A
    Did you think that we wouldn't
    be prepared for such an event?
[10:02] A
    Even if Kenofi is disabled, the energy
    that's accumulated inside won't vanish.
[10:09] A
    At the moment, he's an unexploded bomb
    that can destroy an entire planet.
[10:14] A
    Do you know what will happen if
    we give him a little stimulation?
[10:18] Kon
    You bastard!
[10:22] Kon
    Huh?
[10:23] Kyu
    Don't touch me!
[10:32] Kon
    What?
[10:33] Hiji
    Are you guys okay?!
[10:36] Kon
    Toshi!
[10:37] Kon
    Stop them!
[10:38] Kon
    They're going to
[10:40] Kon
    discharge the energy in Obi Hajime
[10:42] Kon
    and obliterate Earth!
[10:45] Obi
    So once I've picked up
    what I left behind,
[10:50] Obi
    I'll come back.
[10:52] Obi
    In the meantime,
[10:54] Obi
    Instructor Sakata, look
    after everyone for me.
[11:08] Gin
    Let's go, guys.
[11:13] Gin
    Didn't you hear me?
[11:16] Gin
    You didn't forget the teachings of the
    School of Beam Saber again, did you?
[11:24] Otae
    It's okay.
[11:27] Otae
    Don't worry, Obi-one-niisama.
[11:31] Otae
    We won't cry anymore.
[11:36] Otae
    So just promise... Just promise us...
[11:41] Obi
    Yeah...
[11:44] Obi
    I promise that we'll meet again.
[11:49] Hiji
    Fire!
[11:50] Hiji
    Shoot that thing down!
[11:53] A
    It's too late!
[11:55] B
    Beam cannon energy fully charged!
[11:58] B
    We're locked onto Kenofi's coordinates!
[12:03] A
    What?! Impossible!
[12:05] A
    Kenofi has...
[12:12] B
    That man is pointing
    his beam cannon at us!
[12:16] A
    It means nothing! Open fire!
[12:22] Obi
    Listen up, you two.
[12:25] Obi
    Tears are handy for washing away 
    troubling and sad feelings.
[12:34] Obi
    But when you grow up, you'll learn
[12:38] Obi
    that there are things so sad, they 
    can never be washed away by tears.
[12:45] Obi
    That there are painful memories 
    that should never be washed away.
[12:50] Obi
    So people who are truly strong 
    laugh when they want to cry.
[12:57] Obi
    They endure all of the pain and sorrow
[13:01] Obi
    while laughing with everybody else.
[13:05] Obi
    You can cry all you want right now.
[13:10] Obi
    But one day, you must become 
    samurai strong enough not to cry.
SIGN    Kabuki First District
[13:41] A
    Why don't you drop by, big guy?
SIGN    Snack Smile
[13:44] A
    We've got a bunch of cute girls!
[13:46] A
    How about it, gentlemen?
[13:48] Kon
    Is that true?
[13:50] Kon
    We can choose anyone we want?
[13:52] A
    Yup, you can choose anyone,
    and they're all babes.
[13:57] Kyu
    Really, then...
[14:00] Both
    We'll take the babe named Otae.
[14:02] A
    Oh, it's you guys again.
[14:05] A
    You keep coming back every day.
[14:07] A
    I told you that you're wasting your time.
[14:09] A
    We haven't heard anything from Otae-chan
[14:11] ---
    since she went on leave a month back,
[14:13] A
    and we have no idea
    when she's returning.
[14:16] A
    We're struggling right now after
    losing our top attraction,
[14:20] A
    so could you not disrupt our business?
[14:25] Kyu
    It's been a month already.
[14:28] Kon
    That man saved our planet,
[14:31] Kon
    but we weren't able to save anything.
[14:37] Kyu
    I heard that Shinpachi-kun hasn't
    been down to Odd Jobs since.
[14:41] Kyu
    This is when they really need
    other people by their sides,
[14:47] Kyu
    but the person they truly want
    by their sides is no longer here.
[14:53] Kyu
    If we go visit, we'll only
    put more stress on them.
[14:57] Kyu
    I don't believe I can make
    them smile right now.
[15:02] Kon
    All we can do now is
    wait and have faith
[15:06] Kon
    that the two of them
    will be able to overcome
[15:08] ---
    their sorrow and move forward.
[15:12] Kon
    Our job is to smile and welcome
    them back when the time comes.
[15:17] Kon
    For now, we wait.
[15:18] Kon
    But when the time comes...
[15:20] Kyu
    Yes, I'm sure they'll smile again.
[15:22] Shin
    Man, that was so much fun.
[15:25] Otae
    Yes, it's been so long since the two of us
[15:27] ---
    were able to have some fun together.
[15:29] Shin
    But I wanted to stay a little longer.
[15:31] Otae
    That was long enough.
[15:32] Otae
    We don't want to trouble
    everyone any longer.
[15:36] Shin
    Oh, it's Kondo-san and Kyubei-san.
[15:39] Shin
    Haven't seen you in a while.
[15:41] Shin
    The Shimura siblings
    are back from Waiiha!
[15:44] Otae
    Here, we brought chocolate covered
    macadamia nuts as a souvenir.
[15:48] Both
    Vacation?
[15:50] Otae
    Yes, we went to Planet Waiiha,
    where it's always summer.
[15:54] Shin
    You know, with all these new long arcs,
[15:56] ---
    we haven't had a chance to take a break.
[15:58] Shin
    So we decided to use the paid
    vacation days we've accumulated
[16:01] ---
    and take some time off together.
[16:04] Shin
    So, Planet Waiiha was awesome!
[16:06] Shin
    You're probably thinking that
    vacationing in Waiiha is too cliche.
[16:10] Shin
    But there's a reason it's considered cliche.
[16:13] Kon
    Ah, I understand what you mean.
[16:14] ---
    Waiiha is the best!
[16:15] Kon
    How am I supposed to understand?!
[16:16] Kon
    Why would you choose this 
    timing to go on vacation?!
[16:19] Kon
    I thought that you were both 
    moping around inside your house,
[16:23] Kon
    but you're completely tanned!
[16:24] Kon
    Dark as chocolate covered 
    macadamia nuts!
[16:27] Kyu
    Can't you tell, Kondo? 
    They're pushing themselves.
[16:31] Kyu
    This wasn't an ordinary vacation.
[16:32] Kyu
    They left Edo so we wouldn't 
    have to see them suffer.
[16:37] Kyu
    And they're acting cheerful 
    so we don't notice that fact.
[16:42] Kyu
    Don't say anything that'll 
    dig the wound open again.
[16:45] Kon
    Well, I'm glad that you
    enjoyed yourselves.
[16:48] Kon
    But it must have cost
    a lot to go to Waiiha.
[16:52] Kon
    You must have had a lot saved up.
[16:53] Otae
    Oh, we paid for it with money
[16:55] ---
    we received from Obi-one-niisama's
    life insurance.
[16:57] Kon
    What wound? They dug up a 
    whole new grave on their own!
[17:01] Kon
    I can see him! I can see 
    Obi-one-niisama rolling in the grave!
[17:03] Otae
    Obi-one-niisama made arrangements for
[17:06] ---
    the money to be given to this 
    dojo if anything happened to him,
[17:09] Otae
    so the money was meant 
    to be used for the dojo.
[17:12] Kon
    Really? So you went on vacation?
[17:14] Otae
    That's why...
[17:14] Kon
    You used that money to go on vacation?
[17:16] Otae
    We were happy to use it
[17:18] Otae
    for macadamia nuts.
[17:20] Kon
    You used the money for macadamia nuts?!
[17:22] Kon
    Wait!
[17:23] Kon
    You spent the money from 
    his life on nuts?!
[17:25] Otae
    It wasn't much money.
[17:27] Kon
    He's gotta be mad!
[17:28] Kon
    He's going to shoot 
    beams down from heaven!
[17:30] Kon
    Wait, Kyubei-kun!
[17:32] Kon
    These siblings are a lot 
    stronger than I expected!
[17:34] Kon
    They've overcome their brother's death 
    and started trampling all over it!
[17:37] Kyu
    You must understand, Kondo.
[17:39] Kyu
    They're trying to say goodbye 
    to their memory of Obi Hajime.
[17:42] Kyu
    So they exchanged his life for 
    chocolate covered macadamia nuts
[17:45] Kyu
    so the memories will 
    melt like chocolate.
[17:48] Kon
    No, that can't be it.
[17:51] Kyu
    Don't you understand, Kondo?
[17:52] Kyu
    Macadamia nuts are really good.
[17:55] Kon
    You just want to eat macadamia nuts!
[17:57] Otae
    Please help yourself, Kondo-san.
[18:00] Otae
    Please enjoy the fruits of the legacy
    left behind by Obi-one-niisama's life.
[18:04] Kon
    I can't eat that!
[18:06] Kon
    I've never eaten chocolate 
    that was so meaningful!
[18:09] Shin
    Hajime-nii...
[18:11] Shin
    We won't let your wishes go to waste.
[18:15] Shin
    We will restore this dojo
[18:17] Shin
    and make it as busy as it
    was when you were here
[18:22] Shin
    with these macadamia nuts.
[18:23] Kon
    Uh, I'm pretty sure 
    you wasted the money!
[18:25] Kon
    Why would you need macadamia nuts?!
[18:28] A
    Hello!
[18:30] Otae
    Look, Shin-chan.
[18:31] Otae
    They're here already.
[18:33] B
    Excuse me.
[18:34] B
    Is this the dojo that's
    looking for students?
[18:38] Shin
    We've been expecting you!
[18:40] Shin
    Welcome to Kodokan!
[18:43] Mada
    Is it true that you'll give us
    macadamia nuts if we train in the sword?
[18:46] Kon
    You're just using the nuts as bait!
[18:49] Kon
    Shinpachi-kun! They're not
    looking for a home dojo!
[18:51] Kon
    They're just plain homeless!
[18:53] Kon
    And what happened to your tan?!
[18:54] Shin
    It's okay.
[18:56] Shin
    We can start with macadamia nuts
[18:57] ---
    and hope they learn to love the sword.
[19:00] Shin
    If that's what it takes to
    protect the sword he loved...
[19:04] ---
    To protect this samurai country...
[19:08] Mada
    Hey, who cares about swords?
[19:10] Mada
    Give us the macadamia nuts already!
[19:12] Kon
    You should be looking for work 
    instead of begging for nuts.
[19:14] Gin
    Shut up!
[19:16] Gin
    Don't be in such a rush.
[19:17] Gin
    No need to worry.
[19:19] Gin
    You'll get all the nuts you want,
[19:22] Gin
    if you can land a clean hit on Sakata
    Gintoki, substitute instructor
[19:26] ---
    for the School of Tendo
    Mushin Macadamia.
[19:30] Kon
    You guys...
[19:32] Gin
    I promise you this.
[19:34] Gin
    By the time you get to eat your nuts,
[19:37] ---
    you'll all be functional
    members of society again.
[19:40] Kon
    Wait, this is turning into 
    a different kind of school!
[19:42] Gin
    So promise me something.
[19:45] Gin
    No matter how difficult the training may be
[19:48] Gin
    or what kinds of hardships you face in life,
[19:52] Gin
    never stop smiling.
[19:56] Gin
    That's the one and only rule in
[19:58] ---
    the School of Tendo Mushin Macadamia.
SIGN    Eternal Instructor
    Obi Hajime
[20:01] Gin
    Isn't that right,
[20:03] ---
    Instructor Obi-one?
[20:11] Mada
    That's fine!
[20:12] Mada
    Gang up on him!
[20:14] All
    Give us the macadamia nuts!
[20:20] Kag
    Okay, next!
[20:21] Mada
    Hold on!
[20:22] Mada
    What happened to the swords?! This
    is turning into a kung fu dojo!
[20:25] Mada
    Is this a dojo where we get beat
    up in return for macadamia nuts?!
[20:29] Kag
    Stop worrying about the
    details and just smile!
[20:32] Mada
    How can I do that?!
[20:36] Kyu
    Kondo, do you understand?
[20:43] Kon
    I sure do.
[20:49] Kon
    Hey, they won't help you
    become decent samurai.
[20:53] Kon
    I'll take you on!
[20:55] Kon
    Bring it!
[20:57] Kyu
    Nonsense.
[20:58] Kyu
    The macadamia nuts will be mine!
[21:00] Kon
    That's not the point here!
[21:05] Gin
    Well, let's get going,
[21:11] Gin
    Shinpachi.
[21:11] Obi
    Shin-bo.
[21:17] Shin
    Yes!
[21:22] Otae
    Obi-one-niisama, I'm sorry.
[21:25] Otae
    We can't use the money that
    you left for our dojo.
[21:30] Otae
    There hasn't been time for a
    proper burial, but I promise to
[21:33] ---
    put you in a grave next to our father.
[21:36] Otae
    So don't worry about us.
[21:40] Otae
    The two of you can enjoy your
    liquor and gasoline together.
[21:46] Otae
    It's okay.
[21:48] Otae
    Shin-chan and I
[21:50] Otae
    and our wonderful friends
[21:55] Otae
    are doing just fine.
SIGN    Announcement
[23:31] Mada
    Three years after Benizakura
    Arc the New Translation,
[23:35] Mada
    we now have a completely original
    story by the author Sorachi Hideaki,
[23:40] Mada
    which delves into the past.
[23:46] Mada
    Gintama the Movie: The Final Act!
[23:48] Mada
    Odd Jobs Forever!
[23:51] Both
    Watch as the Gintama
    anime comes to an end!
SIGN    In theaters July 6th
[23:55] Shin
    Wait, what's this about?!
[23:56] Gin
    Hold on a sec!
[23:56] Kag
    Where did they get that idea?!
[23:57] Gin
    What's this Final Act business?!
[23:58] Shin
    What? The manga isn't over yet!
[23:58] Kag
    Is this just the usual
    fooling around again?!
[23:59] Gin
    Gin-san and the Yaksha know nothing!
SIGN    Dog Food Doesn't  Taste Like You Think
[24:00] Gin
    Next time: Dog Food Doesn't
    Taste Like You Think
[24:04] Gin
    Nobody said anything to me about this!
SIGN    Gintama as usual. Odd Jobs as usual.
[24:06] Gin
    Hey, can you hear me?!
[24:08] Gin
    Hey, Fujita!
[24:09] Gin
    Hey, Shinji!
SIGN    The trio plus one animal,  forever...
[24:10] Gin
    Hey...
[24:12] Gin
    Are you listening to me?!