# E135 - Before Thinking About the Earth, Think About the More Endangered Gintaman’s Future!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6752K4VR/before-thinking-about-the-earth-think-about-the-more-endangered-gintamans-future)
Translator:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] Amachi**
Uho.
**[00:06] Gintoki (M)**
Wasn't that shot sorta long for just "Uho"?
***SIGN*** [SHUEISHA]
**[01:41] Editor**
Daitooo!
**[01:43] Editor**
Hey, you! There's no way I can approve a dirty story idea like this!
**[01:48] Editor**
You can't jump into the gutter just because you ran out of decent ideas!
**[01:51] Editor**
What're you tryin' to pull?!
**[01:52] Editor**
What? You're trying to use smut to cover up a bad story, aren't you?
**[01:57] ---**
But I can easily see you've reached the limit of your abilities! You've got no depth at all!
**[02:00] Editor**
Daito, please!
**[02:03] Editor**
Please don't frustrate me.
**[02:07] ---**
My hair is falling out because of you!
**[02:09] ---**
I can't tell people I part my hair in the middle anymore! You hear me?!
**[02:12] Editor**
Look over there!
**[02:13] ---**
That's Konishi, who was doing your job before!
**[02:14] Editor**
He became an efficient editor, and is now in charge of the mega-hit manga, "One Park"!
**[02:18] ---**
When he was in charge,
**[02:20] ---**
"Gintaman" was a well-known battle manga and it laid the foundations for JUMP.
**[02:28] Editor**
But look at you! Who the hell are you?
**[02:31] ---**
You're just some big guy, but people like you usually have small peckers.
**[02:35] Editor**
But you have a big pecker! Even that pisses me off!
**[02:39] ---**
Listen! If your next survey scores the lowest, like this time,
**[02:45] ---**
Daito, you and your services on "Gintaman" will...
**[02:48] Editor**
...no longer be needed for JUMP!
**[02:57] Daito (N)**
How did things get like this?
**[03:01] Daito (N)**
Why do I have to languish like this?
**[03:04] Daito (N)**
I used to be in charge of a manga about girls who played American football, called "Paishield." That was a big hit.
**[03:10] Daito (N)**
Murara Sensei always gave me his manuscripts three days before the deadline,
**[03:13] Daito (N)**
even though I didn't ask.
**[03:16] Daito (N)**
I had always scored high in reader surveys.
**[03:17] Girl**
I won't let you do that!
**[03:19] Daito (N)**
But then for some reason, I was switched to another manga.
**[03:22] Daito (N)**
And now, I'm working on small-time manga like this.
**[03:27] Daito (N)**
I didn't know what was wrong.
**[03:30] ---**
I didn't want to know what had happened to me.
**[03:32] Gintoki**
Aw crap, "Gintaman" is still in this week's issue.
**[03:36] Gintoki**
I can't believe it. It's jumped the shark.
**[03:40] Gintoki**
I wonder what the editor is thinking.
**[03:43] Gintoki**
No way. Even if they put some effort into it, it's hopeless.
**[03:46] ---**
It's always in the lineup before "Nyaga-san."
**[03:49] ---**
Man, I sure hate seeing JUMP slide like this.
**[03:52] Gintoki**
While I was an advisor for "Gintaman," I made it a great battle manga that was a pillar of JUMP.
**[03:56] Gintoki**
But it's really lost its edge.
**[03:58] Daito**
Um...
**[04:00] Gintoki**
Huh?
**[04:01] Daito**
Could I ask you a few questions?
**[04:05] Gintoki**
I see. Now you're in charge of "Gintaman."
**[04:09] ---**
What happened to that guy I called Shorty who thought he was an otaku.
**[04:11] Daito**
You mean Konishi.
**[04:13] ---**
He's in charge of "One Park."
**[04:14] Gintoki**
Wow, he is?
**[04:16] Gintoki**
It sounds like he's really risen in life.
**[04:19] Gintoki**
I remember he was always worried about getting fired back then.
**[04:22] Daito (N)**
He treated Konishi like a rookie editor?!
**[04:26] ---**
It means the rumor that someone else was the real engineer behind the success of Gintaman was correct.
**[04:34] Daito**
I'm not worthy! Please help me!
***SIGN*** ["Before Worrying about the Earth, Think About the Even More Endangered Future of 'Gintaman'"]
**[05:10] Konishi**
You can't just call and expect me to come anymore.
**[05:13] Daito**
Konishi! I'm sorry, but thank you for coming.
**[05:15] Konishi**
You should be thankful! I hardly have any time since I started working on "One Park."
**[05:18] Konishi**
You should know that.
**[05:20] ---**
All these meetings, parties, dating parties and more dating parties.
**[05:24] Daito (M)**
Mainly dating parties.
**[05:26] Konishi**
I've moved on from "Gintaman" - that's a manga for the masses.
**[05:30] ---**
Can you tell me how many millions of magazines "Gintaman" sold in its first edition?
**[05:34] ---**
Can you? Tell me!
**[05:35] Daito**
M-Millions? Not thousands or...?
**[05:38] Konishi**
No. It's at least two million, like One Park!
**[05:43] Daito**
More like...ze-zero point million.
**[05:45] Amachi**
Uho.
**[05:47] Koishi**
Thanks for inviting me.
**[05:49] Daito**
Koishi Sensei! I'm glad you could come!
**[05:52] Koishi**
Hey. Long time, no see!
**[05:54] Konishi**
What?!
**[05:55] ---**
What's he doing here?
**[05:57] Daito**
Well...
**[05:59] Gintoki**
Yo!
**[06:01] Konishi**
Y-You are?
**[06:03] Daito**
Gintoki! Now that you're here, anything is possible.
**[06:08] Gintoki**
I owed you one, so showing up was the least I could do for you.
**[06:12] Daito**
So everybody's here.
**[06:14] Gintoki**
Hey, Shorty! Long time no see.
**[06:18] Konishi**
Well...Who are you?
**[06:20] Gintoki**
What are you talking about? Don't tell me you've forgotten my face.
**[06:24] ---**
Say "Dondake?!"
**[06:27] Daito**
As you know, "Gintaman" has been losing its popularity lately.
**[06:31] ---**
So I'd like to ask for your help in boosting it back up.
**[06:35] ---**
I'd appreciate your support.
**[06:36] Amachi**
Uho!
**[06:38] Gintoki**
But "Gintaman" ran out of battles, it's past its peak.
**[06:43] Gintoki**
I don't think an extension is possible.
**[06:45] Konishi**
You say that, but you the one who turned it into a battle manga on a par with "Dragon Bose!"
**[06:49] Gintoki**
Listen! The manga in JUMP all turn battle manga before they end! That's destiny!
**[06:54] Konishi**
But it's not always like that!
**[06:55] Gintoki**
Well, it depends on the story.
**[06:58] Koishi**
Hey, please calm down, you two.
**[07:02] Gintoki**
Who are you?
**[07:03] Daito**
This is Koishi Sensei. He wrote and illustrated "Maison de Gin-Gin" and now works on "Asokomarudashi."
**[07:09] Gintoki**
I see. I heard you worked as a cashier in your hometown for a while.
**[07:12] ---**
Anyway, what are you doing here?
**[07:15] Koishi**
You know, I'm a revival man, so I thought he needed someone like me to revive "Gintaman"!
**[07:26] Koishi**
I'm outta here.
**[07:27] Daito**
Oh, no! Please wait, Koishi Sensei!
**[07:28] Amachi**
Uho!
**[07:29] Gintoki**
Hey, I was just kidding. I really liked your manga!
**[07:34] ---**
Especially that report manga!
**[07:36] Daito**
Hey, don't mention that one!
**[07:46] Daito**
So...
**[07:47] All**
Cheers!
**[07:48] Daito**
Well, I'm kicking off our meeting about "Gintaman's" future.
**[07:53] ---**
Does anyone have any ideas?
**[07:55] Konishi**
I said, stop taking pieces of chicken off the skewer!
**[07:58] Konishi**
But you can't taste the real yakitori without the skewer. Understand?
**[07:58] Daito**
Um... Any ideas?
**[08:00] ---**
Nah, this is how you enjoy yakitori!
**[08:03] Koishi**
I think everyone want to try all kinds of food.
**[08:05] Konishi**
I don't need that kind of advice!
**[08:05] Daito**
Ideas?
**[08:07] Koishi**
Yakitori is yakitori whether it's on skewer or not.
**[08:10] Konishi**
What if yakitori came in a tube.
**[08:11] Konishi**
Then it wouldn't be yakitori anymore, would it? Tube! Tube! Tube!
**[08:12] Daito**
Stop talking about the tube! Focus on the meeting!
**[08:16] Gintoki**
So, what should we talk about first?
**[08:19] Daito**
Let's first talk about what the issue is with "Gintaman."
**[08:23] Konishi**
All right.
**[08:24] Koishi**
There's no question that "Gintaman" has too much dirty language.
**[08:27] Konishi**
And the illustrations are crude!
**[08:28] Amachi**
Uho...
**[08:28] Daito**
Well, those are just basic issues. How can I explain it?
**[08:33] Gintoki**
In a word, what is "Gintaman" lacking?
**[08:38] Daito**
That's it!
**[08:39] Konishi**
I know the answer. What "Gintaman" doesn't have is...
**[08:43] ---**
...sex!
**[08:44] Daito**
Sex?
**[08:45] Koishi**
The women in "Gintaman" are all violent characters.
**[08:49] Koishi**
Ginta shrinks and jumps right between her giant boobs.
**[08:53] Koishi**
So it needs another character, some sexy woman.
**[08:56] Daito**
Ah ha! "Gintaman" didn't have the ingredients for a heroine! That's it!
**[09:01] Amachi**
Uho!
**[09:02] Gintoki**
All right, let's figure out the details of this heroine.
**[09:07] Amachi**
Uho!
**[09:08] Gintoki**
You got any ideas?
**[09:09] Amachi**
Uho uho....
**[09:23] Daito**
Great!
**[09:24] Gintoki**
What did he say? Please translate for me.
**[09:27] Daito**
He said, giant boobs!
**[09:28] Gintoki**
Hey! Why did it take him so long just to say that?
**[09:32] Koishi**
And the heroine is Gintaman's childhood friend.
**[09:35] Koishi**
We need to have this kind of traditional setting.
**[09:36] Konishi**
I like a fair-skinned girl from the snow country.
**[09:40] Daito**
How about a sporty girl, just like "Paishield"?
**[09:42] ---**
She belongs to the basketball club, and she wears sleeveless shirts!
**[09:45] ---**
Does that sound sexy or what?
**[09:46] Konishi**
That's why you can't sell a million magazines.
**[09:50] Daito**
Give it a rest, you idiot!
**[09:52] ---**
You talk like you're a big man, but the real big man is Yoda Sensei! Not you!
**[09:55] Konishi**
What?!
**[09:56] Koishi**
Hey, hey. Calm down, both of you!
**[09:58] Koishi**
How about a girl who speaks with a Hakata accent?
**[10:01] Gintoki**
Well, do you have any good ideas?
**[10:04] Amachi**
Uho?
**[10:22] Mikako**
Ginta! Ginta!
**[10:24] ---**
Hey, Ginta!
**[10:27] ---**
He's still sleeping?!
**[10:33] Mikako**
Wake up!
**[10:34] ---**
Ow!
**[10:35] ---**
Hey, you!
**[10:38] Mikako**
What do you mean, "hey you"?
**[10:40] Mikako**
I came in here ta wake ya up!
**[10:42] Ginta-Kun**
I'm saying: Don't come into my room without asking!
**[10:45] Mikako**
Whatevs. You'll be late fer school if ya don't hurry!
**[10:48] Ginta-Kun**
It's not time yet!
**[10:52] Mikako**
Whateva!
**[10:53] ---**
Get up!
**[10:57] Ginta-Kun (N)**
This is Mikako Nakajima.
**[11:00] Ginta-Kun (N)**
She lives next door and she's always poking her nose in my business.
***SIGN*** [This window is for you]
**[11:14] Mikako**
Hurry, hurry! If we're late for school, it'll be yer fault!
**[11:21] Mikako**
Ginta, can I ask ya a favor?
**[11:24] Ginta-Kun**
What's that?
**[11:26] Mikako**
Can ya come and watch my basketball game today?
**[11:29] Mikako**
Can you?
**[11:31] Ginta-Kun**
If I have time.
**[11:32] Mikako**
Really?!
**[11:34] ---**
I'm so happy!
**[11:35] Ginta-Kun**
Hey, stop it! It's dangerous! Sit back!
**[11:49] Girl Student A**
We don't have much time left.
**[11:51] Girl Student B**
We made it to the finals, but...
**[11:53] Girl Student C**
This is it.
**[11:54] Mikako**
All of you, let's not give up!
**[11:56] Mikako**
We never give up! Let's play our best!
**[11:59] All**
All right!
**[12:22] Girls**
Wow! Great! Mikako! We did it!
**[12:31] Mikako (M)**
Ginta.
**[12:34] Amachi**
Uho...
**[12:41] Gintoki**
What! Is that all?!
**[12:44] Gintoki**
Hey, stupid gorilla!
**[12:45] ---**
Part 1 had a terrible ending! I didn't understand it at all!
**[12:49] ---**
That's not a good way to head into the commercials!
**[12:51] Amachi**
Uho.
**[12:51] Gintoki**
Did everyone see that? The story is too cliche!
**[12:55] ---**
We're gonna need something a lot better than that to make it great!
**[12:57] Konishi**
Well, how about putting a handwarmer on her chest?
**[13:00] Gintoki**
Forget about the snow country!
**[13:02] Koishi**
Yes! How about twins?
**[13:04] Daito**
But "Gintaman" already had twins who were mediums.
**[13:07] Daito**
Their names were Ipa and Nema.
**[13:10] Gintoki**
So, what about a set of 48 sisters?
**[13:13] Daito**
48?
**[13:13] Amachi**
Uho?!
**[13:14] Gintoki**
It's very important to have an impact!
**[13:15] ---**
Akimoto always does it and it works for him!
**[13:18] Daito**
You're straying off the subject.
**[13:20] Gintoki**
I don't care! You guys, I want to hear more ideas with impact.
**[13:23] Koishi**
How about that heroine who is a divorcee with one kid?
**[13:26] Gintoki**
That's good!
**[13:27] Daito**
I get really excited about female dentists.
**[13:29] Gintoki**
I love it!
**[13:31] Koishi**
She cooks fish and is a real family girl.
**[13:34] Gintoki**
Sounds great!
**[13:35] Konishi**
She's good at mimicking voices.
**[13:36] Gintoki**
Wonderful!
**[13:37] Daito**
She can't hold her liquor!
**[13:37] Gintoki**
Awesome!
**[13:38] Koichi**
Her dream is to be a bride!
**[13:39] Gintoki**
Cool!
**[13:40] Konishi**
She looks pretty!
**[13:41] Gintoki**
Great!
**[13:42] Daito**
A bus driver!
**[13:42] Gintoki**
Swell!
**[13:46] Gintoki**
Wow! I'm stuffed to the gills!
**[13:49] Gintoki**
We beat these ideas to death! "Gintaman" will be secure! Right, Amachi?
**[13:54] Amachi**
U...ho...
**[13:56] Konishi**
But to sell a million copies, it'll all depends on how you put it all together.
**[13:59] Daito**
No problem. Because there's a character called Amanto.
**[14:03] Koishi**
I see. If you get stuck, that's a good excuse to use Amanto!
**[14:11] Gintoki**
Then we're going home!
**[14:13] Daito**
Good luck, Amachi Sensei.
**[14:15] Gintoki**
Okay, let's go somewhere else!
**[14:17] Daito**
Let's go to a cabaret club!
**[14:18] All**
Great idea!
***SIGN*** [Odd Jobs Office]
**[14:35] Gurako**
Boss! I need to get paid! When can I get my paycheck?
**[14:40] Patsuan**
Dondake!
**[14:42] Ginta-San**
Be quiet.
**[14:44] Gurako**
My stomach and my back will be one and the same soon!
**[14:48] Gurako**
Come on! Pay up! Feed me!
**[14:51] Patsuan**
Dondake!
**[14:53] Ginta-San**
Okay, okay.
**[14:55] Ginta-San**
You can take anything here to a pawnshop.
**[15:02] Gurako**
What's with all this junk!
**[15:04] Gurako**
Even if I take these to the flea market, nobody will buy them.
**[15:07] Patsuan**
Dondake!
**[15:10] Ginta-San**
This is...
**[15:11] Ginta-San**
...my childhood photo album!
**[15:14] Ginta-San**
Oh! That's...
**[15:16] Ginta-San**
Mikako Nakajima. She lived next door.
**[15:19] Ginta-San**
I bet she's a beautiful woman now.
***SIGN*** [My best childhood friend.]
***SIGN*** [MIND YOUR SUGAR LEVELS]
**[15:32] Gurako**
You love sweets, don't you boss?
**[15:35] Gurako**
Your teeth are gonna rot if you keep eating that stuff.
**[15:39] Patsuan**
Dondake!
**[15:40] Ginta-San**
Shut up! Leave me alone.
**[15:47] Ginta-San**
Ouch! My tooth hurts!
**[15:50] Gurako**
See, I told you. I heard a new dentist just opened up nearby.
**[15:54] Gurako**
According to rumors, she's really good-looking.
**[15:56] Patsuan**
Dondake!
**[15:58] Ginta-San**
Ouch.
**[16:03] Ginta-San**
Here it is.
**[16:05] Mikako**
What are ya doing? Open yer mouth wide.
**[16:09] Ginta-San**
Ah...
**[16:13] Mikako**
Don't move!
**[16:18] Mikako**
Okay, you can rinse yer mouth.
**[16:23] Mikako**
Long time, no see, Ginta.
**[16:25] Ginta-San**
Huh?!
**[16:26] Mikako**
Ya don't recognize me?
**[16:27] ---**
It's me!
**[16:32] Ginta-San**
You're...Mikako Nakajima?
***SIGN*** [Bar Olivia]
**[16:38] Mikako**
Ya still love sweets, doncha? Just the way ya were.
**[16:42] Ginta-San**
I haven't seen you for ten years.
**[16:45] Mikako**
Really?
**[16:48] Mikako**
But ten years went by in a flash.
**[16:53] Mikako**
Give me another.
**[16:54] Ginta-San**
Are you sure you can handle all that?
**[16:56] Mikako**
Don't worry.
**[16:58] Ginta-San**
But what a coincidence that you opened your dental clinic in this town.
**[17:02] Mikako**
That's not exactly right. It's not a coincidence.
**[17:05] Ginta-San**
What?!
**[17:06] Mikako**
In fact, I'm traveling around, looking fer someone.
**[17:12] Ginta-San**
Someone?
**[17:13] Mikako**
Yeah.
**[17:15] ---**
I feel like I'm drunk.
**[17:16] Ginta-San**
H-Hey! That's why I asked you.
**[17:18] Mikako**
To tell ya the truth, I can't drink.
**[17:22] Mikako**
But I can cook fish.
**[17:26] Mikako**
And I do good impressions of other people.
**[17:28] ---**
Haven't the kids eaten yet?
**[17:31] Mikako**
See, did I sound like him?
**[17:32] Ginta-San**
Y-Yeah.
**[17:34] Mikako**
But I have to go back home soon.
**[17:38] Ginta-San**
Back home?
**[17:40] Mikako**
I finally found you, but...
**[18:15] Mikako**
Ginta!
**[18:19] Mikako**
I'm glad you could come!
**[18:21] Ginta-San**
I'm here because you asked.
**[18:26] Ginta-San**
What? I'm sorry I'm late.
**[18:30] Mikako**
Nothing. I'm so happy.
**[18:32] ---**
Ginta, you're not cold?
**[18:35] Mikako**
Here you go. A handwarmer.
**[18:37] Ginta-San**
Thank you.
**[18:39] Mikako**
It's time ta say good-bye.
**[18:40] Ginta-San**
Yeah...but we'll see each other again.
**[18:44] Mikako**
No, we won't.
**[18:46] Ginta-San**
What?
**[18:57] Mikako**
Then...
**[18:59] Ginta-San**
What do you mean we won't see each other again?
**[19:02] Mikako**
I...came because I wanted to see you.
**[19:06] Mikako**
I liked you.
**[19:11] Mikako**
Take this.
**[19:17] Mikako**
Take care of yourself.
**[19:35] ---**
Can I come with you?
**[19:41] Mikako**
Come this way, Ginta! I have someone ta introduce ya to!
**[19:43] Ginta-San**
Someone?
**[19:45] Mikako**
This is my twin sister,
**[19:46] ---**
Mitsuko!
**[19:48] Ginta-San**
Tw-Twins?!
**[19:49] Hiroshi**
Mom!
**[19:51] Ginta-San**
Mom?!
**[19:51] Hiroshi**
Where have you been?
**[19:53] Mikako**
I'm sorry, Hiroshi. I didn't mean to leave ya alone.
**[19:56] Ginta-San**
Hiroshi?!
**[19:57] Mikako**
I'm a divorcee.
**[19:59] Ginta-San**
A divorcee?!
**[20:01] Ginta-San**
Ah!
**[20:03] ---**
Why is this train flying in space?!
**[20:07] Mikako**
I'm an Amanto from the Planet of the Giant Boobs.
**[20:11] ---**
I came to Earth in order to find my best childhood friend.
**[20:15] Ginta-San**
What?!
**[20:16] Mikako**
It's time for the final battle!
**[20:18] Mikako**
Oh!
**[20:20] Mikako**
It's either them or us.
**[20:22] Mikako**
There can be only one winner!
**[20:24] ---**
Let's settle this once and for all!
**[20:26] All**
Oh!
**[20:27] Ginta-San**
Um...
**[20:28] Mikako**
Yes?
**[20:29] Ginta-San**
Who are they?
**[20:30] Mikako**
We're from the Planet of the Giant Boobs
**[20:33] ---**
And they're from Planet Flat Chest. We're sister planets!
**[20:35] Ginta-San**
Planet Flat Chest?!
**[21:00] Mikako**
Go!
**[21:24] Mikako**
Mikako, here!
**[21:29] Mikako (Blue)**
Bring it on!
**[21:52] Mikako**
Then, this is the final attack!
**[22:11] Ginta-San (N)**
Once again, Ginta brings peace to the universe.
**[22:17] Ginta-San (N)**
Thank you, Ginta. Good-bye, "Gintaman."
**[22:33] Gintoki**
Whatever...
***SIGN***
***SIGN*** [Ugyaaaaaaaaaah!!]
***SIGN*** [Too late!!]
***SIGN*** [See you again next time!]