343 - Flavoring Is Best in Small Quantities Source: Crunchyroll Translator: Editor: Timer: QC: (Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.) SIGN    Gintama SIGN    Silver Soul SIGN    Silver Soul Arc SIGN    Flavoring Is Best in Small Quantities [01:40] Kat     Utsuro made the Altana reserves of seven     planets go berserk, destroying them. [01:45] Kat     His true goal was to use the Altana     Liberation Army and turn Earth... [01:51] Kat     into space dust. [01:53] Kat     So our job is to... [01:55] Kat     Pass the soy sauce, please. [01:57] Sak     I see. Soy sauce, eh? SIGN    Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room     and at a safe distance from your TV!! [01:59] Sak     And what do we do once     we control the soy sauce? [02:02] Kat     Fire it all at once toward     the croquette, obviously. [02:04] Sak     Zura, trickery only works when     you also use traditional tactics. [02:08] Sak     Croquettes are better with     Worcestershire sauce. [02:11] Kat     A samurai can eat anything as long     as he has salt and soy sauce. [02:14] Kat     It's because you get influenced by foreign     culture and use katakana seasoning [02:17] Kat     that you get called "idiot"     and "moron" in katakana. [02:20] Sak     Zura, croquettes themselves     are written in katakana. [02:23] Sak     Ain't it common sense to use katakana     seasoning on katakana foods? [02:27] Kat     It's not that simple. [02:29] Kat     The katakana Yu Darvish and     his wife Saeko didn't work out, [02:32] Kat     but things worked out great for     Nishikawa Kiyoshi and Helen. [02:35] Kat     The world works in strange ways. [02:37] Sak     As lovey-dovey as Kiyoshi and his wife seem,     they must've had tons of difficulties. [02:42] Kat     No way. It's obvious from Helen's smile. [02:44] Sak     Have you seen Saeko's smile, then? [02:47] Kat     What the hell do you know about Helen? [02:49] Sak     What do you know about Saeko's suffering?! [02:52] Kat     Say what? [02:53] Shin     That shtick is particularly irritating     when you consider that Earth is in peril. [02:56] Gin     Right? Makes you wanna destroy Earth, right? [02:59] Gin     Long story short, both Helen     and Saeko did their best. [03:02] Gin     And to save Earth, defeating     Utsuro ain't enough. [03:06] Gin     We also have to stop the war that he started. [03:10] Gin     Let's say... [03:11] Gin     Earth is this croquette, and the maple     syrup on top is the Liberation Army. [03:16] Gin     The pocky stuck in the middle is Utsuro... [03:18] Shin     Uh, the syrup packs too much     punch. I can't follow at all. [03:21] Kag     How confusing. Basically, it's like this. [03:25] Kag     The croquette here is Earth. [03:27] Kag     All the gastric acid attacking     it is the Liberation Army. [03:30] Shin     Pretty sure Earth's done     for here. It's been eaten. [03:33] Shin     Could you stop likening it to a croquette? SIGN    It's like this, right? [03:38] Shin     What the hell did you eat?! [03:39] Shin     That's Korokke the actor, not croquette! [03:41] Mut     That's just how it is. [03:43] Mut     We can't even agree on how to eat croquettes. [03:47] Mut     So we should just eat it however we like,     with whatever seasoning we like. [03:50] Mut     In other words, [03:51] Mut     no different from how it's always been. [03:53] Shin     Even as you say that, your belly's     swollen with croquettes! [03:56] Shin     You really are a Yato, huh? [03:59] Sak     Even if Earth is in peril,     a trader's gotta do business. [04:04] Shin     Business? [04:05] Sak     We're gonna negotiate     with the Liberation Army. [04:07] Sak     For that, we need ta take the     Tendoshu and Utsuro's heads first. [04:12] Sak     We'll sell those heads     to the Liberation Army. [04:14] Sak     In return, we'll buy Earth's future. [04:18] Kat     Will that really stop the war? [04:20] Kat     They're fixated on Earth itself, you know. [04:24] Gin     That's exactly why we have to do it. [04:27] Gin     We have to show the entire universe that     Earthlings have the power to defend Earth from [04:34] Gin     the Tendoshu and the Liberation Army. [04:36] Gin     Or else, Earth doesn't have a future. [04:39] Kat     Even so, [04:41] Kat     is it even possible to bring     them to the negotiating table? [04:44] Kat     Do you really think they'll     listen to nobodies like us? [04:51] Nb     Oh, they will. [04:55] Nb     If they hear that you're not rebels     who turned against the bakufu, [04:59] Nb     but Shogun Tokugawa Nobunobu's official army. [05:03] Shin     Lord Nobunobu?! [05:05] Sak     What's this, Shogun-sama? [05:08] Sak     You're finally willin' to touch     the space food that Gran cooked? [05:13] Nb     Give me another croquette. [05:15] G     Sir! [05:16] Nb     As pathetic as the food may be, [05:18] Nb     one can't fight on an empty stomach.     You're the one who told me that. [05:23] Nb     Take me with you. [05:25] Nb     If you do, the Liberation Army     will treat you as Earth's envoys. [05:30] Kag     You're telling us to become your retainers?! [05:32] Kag     Keep the jokes to your crew cut, okay?! [05:35] Shin     Kagura-chan! [05:38] Nb     A man who became shogun by being     a puppet has no retainers. [05:44] Nb     But even if I'm an empty figurehead,     I can still use the title of shogun. [05:49] Nb     Let me at least choose for myself     my final act as a puppet. [05:53] Kat     After being a puppet all your life,     now you'll willingly choose to act as one? [06:00] Kat     Are you trying to atone for your sins? [06:02] Kat     No matter how hard you try,     we'll never forget what you've done. [06:07] Nb     I won't forget, either. [06:09] Nb     All an empty shogun can do is take in all     of his subjects' sorrow, hatred, and hopes, [06:16] Nb     and watch how things play out until the end. [06:21] Nb     Hey. [06:23] Nb     This is how one is supposed     to eat croquettes, I take it? [06:47] G     Thank you for coming, Shogun-dono. [06:50] G     So, what can we do for you? [06:53] Nb     As representative of Earth's people,     there is something I must discuss with you. [07:06] Nb     Can I use your toilet? [07:11] Kat     And that was how the first contact between     us and the Liberation Army went. [07:15] Kat     They really cannot be taken lightly. [07:17] Kat     You don't even have to wipe your ass [07:19] Kat     with this terrifying technology called     "washlet" that they've developed. [07:22] Shin     What the hell are you guys negotiating?! [07:24] Kat     Because you guys put all sorts     of stuff on his croquettes, [07:27] Kat     it seems he's had an upset     stomach for the past three days. [07:30] Shin     That doesn't mean that after     barging into the enemy's base, [07:33] Shin     you borrow their toilet     and call it a done deal! [07:34] Kat     Relax. It wasn't just their     toilet that we borrowed. SIGN    Abarenbo Shogun [07:37] Kat     We also borrowed sweats and underwear. [07:39] Shin     So he pooped his pants after all? [07:41] Kat     We also borrowed Inpendence     Day and S* Wars. [07:45] Shin     Why were you at Zudaya?     Why were you guys in sweats, too?! [07:47] Kat     We really can't take the     Liberation Army lightly. [07:50] Kat     They even have lodging facilities     and Zudaya on their mother ship. [07:53] Kat     But we're preparing for tomorrow     by watching S*** Wars. [07:56] Kat     We shan't lose. [07:57] Shin     You've already lost! [07:58] Shin     The moment you decided to prepare using     a video you borrowed from the enemy, [08:01] Shin     the Earth was doomed! [08:02] Kat     The real negotiations start tomorrow. [08:04] Kat     Our battle has only just begun. [08:06] Kat     How are things on your end? [08:08] Shin     While you guys were watching S*** Wars,     actual s*** wars broke out over here. [08:13] Shin     In the name of saving Earth, [08:15] Shin     the Liberation Army was looting     and pillaging everything. [08:18] Shin     Citizens all over Edo are     revolting to put an end to this. [08:24] 73     Is this all the Liberation Army's got? [08:27] 73     I thought they'd entertain us, but they     ran away as soon as we poked 'em a little. [08:31] 73     Yuki-chan of the Iai YankWank Pub     I frequent is much more liberatin'. [08:37] Sai     You don't understand a thing. [08:40] Sai     Did you learn nothing from watching Jirocho? [08:42] 73     Boss is a master of iai yanking too, y'know? [08:45] Sai     Shut up. [08:46] Kyo     The Liberation Army must've quickly     retreated because it was their plan all along. [08:51] Tet     Now they can say they're suppressing a riot     and go all-out to take control of Edo. [08:56] HB     Can't wait. SIGN    Can't wait. The real fun starts now, huh? [08:58] HB     The real fun starts now, huh? [09:01] Sai     In unarmed combat, I don't think     even gods or devils could beat me. [09:06] Sai     But we're up against people who can wipe     out an entire town if they feel like it. [09:11] Sai     They've pummeled me—the     Saigo—and Jirocho once already. [09:15] Sai     How are we supposed to beat them? [09:19] Gen     I'll handle the fighting with machines part. [09:21] Gen     You morons can fight your     own moronic battles. [09:25] Oto     This makes me happy. [09:26] Oto     I never thought I'd live long enough     to see another massive fight like this. [09:30] Oto     I'm looking forward to you     guys avenging my husband. [09:38] Sai     The geezers and hags of this town     are scarier than gods or devils! [09:42] W     Everyone, [09:43] W     thanks for keeping watch. [09:45] Tae     We've brought refreshments! [09:47] Tae     Help yourselves— [09:50] Shin     Under the Four Devas' leadership, [09:52] Shin     the Kabuki District is preparing for     the Liberation Army's next move. [09:52] Shin     Come, now, don't be shy. Eat up. [09:57] Shin     As for Kyubei-san and     the rest of the Yagyu... [10:00] Kyu     It doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman. [10:03] Kyu     Those who're capable of     fighting and those who aren't [10:05] Kyu     should both just do everything they can. [10:09] Kyu     If we all come together as one, I'm     sure we can overcome any adversity! [10:14] Kyu     We, the Yagyu Family,     will protect you to the last! [10:18] Kyu     So would you all protect our country with us? [10:21] Bin     How you've grown, Kyubei. [10:24] Toj     Young Master! I'm sure your mother     is watching your heroics in heaven! [10:28] G     We can help! Use us! [10:31] W     Me, too! [10:32] W     And us! [10:32] G     And me! [10:34] Kyu     Thank you. Thank you. [10:36] Kyu     Tha... [10:42] Shin     While calling for the people to rise up, [10:44] Shin     they seem to be trying to     solidify the various groups. [10:48] Shin     And then there's... [10:52] Sac     How's the Liberation Army looking? [10:55] G     Unable to handle the public's     resistance, they've retreated for now. [10:59] Sac     So they're preparing to crush     Edo once and for all. [11:03] Sac     Let all of Edo know and guide     the people to the shelters. [11:07] G     Understood. [11:09] Sac     What about the other thing? [11:11] G     Haven't found him yet. [11:12] Sac     I see. [11:14] Sac     Very well. Dismissed. [11:19] Sac     What is he doing? [11:22] Shin     Sacchan-san and the Oniwaban [11:24] Shin     are keeping an eye on the Liberation Army. [11:26] Shin     Tsukuyo-san and gang are... [11:27] G     No! [11:29] G     I don't wanna be sold to Yoshiwara! [11:31] G     You people are monsters! [11:34] G     Even if you take my body,     you won't have my heart! [11:34] Hya     You don't have to work     here. Just take refuge. [11:36] G     Shut it, fugly! [11:37] Hya     Who're you calling fugly, you hag?! [11:39] G     What's wrong with calling a fugly a fugly?! [11:41] Hin     How ironic. [11:43] Hin     That thick ceiling, which once kept us     Yoshiwara women locked up underground, [11:48] Hin     is now acting as a truly reliable shield. [11:51] Hin     I thought I'd never see     this metallic sky again. [11:55] Hin     It looks completely     different now, doesn't it? [11:58] Hin     Is it because we know we're     connected, even if it's shut? [12:02] Hin     Connected to the skies over     Edo, where everyone is. [12:05] Tsu     Yeah. [12:07] Tsu     So we should fight, too, [12:09] Tsu     along with the ones who live     under the same skies as us. [12:15] Shin     Katsura-san. [12:17] Shin     Make sure the Liberation Army knows [12:20] Shin     that we will never lose. [12:34] Shin     Katsura-san. [12:35] Shin     Make sure the Liberation Army knows [12:38] Shin     that we will never lose. [12:44] Shin     There you have it. [12:46] Shin     These people aren't rioters. [12:48] Shin     Earthlings rose up to stop the Liberation     Army's looting and savagery. [12:53] Shin     If your soldiers back off, so will they. [12:56] G     We were trying to liberate you from     the Tendoshu's rule, you know. [13:01] G     You call that savagery? [13:03] Sak     It was savagery. [13:05] Sak     We samurai prefer ta wipe our own asses     and clean up our own messes. [13:08] Sak     And you stole our prey from us. [13:13] G     You mean to say you'll deal with     the Tendoshu without our help? [13:16] G     Like you can— [13:18] Nb     They can. [13:20] Nb     They put me through hell,     so I know it better than anyone. [13:24] Nb     A word of advice: [13:26] Nb     do not get on their bad side. [13:28] Nb     Also... [13:31] Nb     Can I use your toil— [13:34] Sak     Just clench your butt. [13:36] Kat     This is do-or-die for both Earth and you. [13:41] Shu     Oh? [13:43] Shu     You seem to have a very favorable     opinion of your subjects. [13:47] Shu     But we can't back down, either. [13:51] Kat     Admiral Shijaku. [13:53] Kat     A primary player in the     Liberation Army's formation, [13:56] Kat     and a master of fleet warfare. [13:58] Kat     A big shot has shown up. [14:00] Nb     A big one's going to show up here, too! [14:03] Shi     The Tendoshu aren't your     country's problem alone. [14:07] Shi     Many planets that were home to     my comrades here were destroyed. [14:11] Shi     Ending the Agency's long rule [14:14] Shi     and taking back our freedom in this battle [14:17] Shi     is the greatest wish of people all across     the universe, and our biggest challenge. [14:21] Shi     Shouldn't we take one another's     hand and deal with this together? [14:28] Shi     The Tokugawa Bakufu is a puppet regime     that the Tendoshu controlled for ages. [14:33] Shi     I thought they'd been rendered spineless. [14:35] Shi     I never expected them to come this far. [14:38] Shi     But his fear is clear for all to see. [14:41] Shi     He can't assert his country's will if it     turns the entire universe against them. [14:47] Shi     Nobody can. [14:50] Shi     Can we take your lack of response     as a sign that you accept us? [14:58] Nb     What do you think freedom is? [15:00] Nb     Does the freedom you people seek [15:03] Nb     mean benefiting even if you have to     take away the freedom of other planets? [15:08] Nb     The freedom we samurai seek     is a much higher standard. [15:13] Nb     True freedom is [15:17] Nb     being able to go to the     toilet whenever you want! [15:22] Sak     Poop whenever you want. [15:24] Kat     I have a change of Pampers ready for you. [15:28] Shi     He's still keeping up his     headstrong attitude? [15:33] G     Does that mean you consider the     Liberation Army your enemie— [15:36] Nb     Enough! [15:38] Nb     Don't make me repeat myself over and over! [15:41] Nb     We'll take down the Tendoshu ourselves. [15:44] Nb     If you want to help, feel free. [15:46] Nb     But if you want to mess with our     country in the name of helping, [15:49] Nb     we'll take you down as well! [15:50] Nb     Okay! That's it! We're done here! [15:54] Shi     Forget asking for help. He ended     the negotiations himself. [15:58] Shi     Is it not fear he's showing, then?     No, it most definitely is fear. [16:02] Shi     But that's... [16:05] Sak     Not yet. [16:06] Kat     Spew everything here,     and not just from your butt. [16:10] Shi     That's a fear directed at something else. [16:13] Shi     Wait, Shogun-dono! [16:14] Nb     Knock it off already! [16:17] Nb     If you keep me here any longer, [16:21] Nb     I just might end up launching it. [16:25] G     L-Launching?! [16:27] G     You! [16:28] G     Y-You couldn't have! [16:30] G     Freeze! [16:33] G     This is all futile. It's too late. [16:37] G     Nobody can stop it anymore. Not even me. [16:41] G     What are you packing? [16:43] G     What are you planning to launch? [16:45] G     Time-based missiles?     Interplanetary ballistic missiles? [16:48] G     Answer! [16:49] Kat     Nope. [16:50] Sak     It's poop. [16:51] Nb     The ones who forced me to do this [16:55] Nb     were none other than you lot! [16:57] Shi     Calm down, everyone. [16:59] G     Admiral. [17:00] Shi     So that's what you were so afraid of. [17:03] Shi     You planned on using it as     your trump card all along? [17:07] Nb     I sent you several warning signs. [17:10] Nb     Not my fault you lot didn't notice them. [17:13] Shi     So it was an ace in the hole you     would've preferred not to use? [17:17] Shi     What will happen if it's launched? [17:20] Shi     Is the target this S.S. Heavenly Bird? [17:22] Nb     Isn't that obvious? It's simple. [17:26] Nb     No amount of asswiping will ever clear     the disgrace it'll bring my name. [17:29] Nb     And future generations won't ever forget it. [17:31] G     A weapon that'll even affect     future generations? [17:34] G     It must be... [17:36] Bo     A nuke! [17:37] Kat     Nope. [17:38] Sak     It's poop. [17:39] G     I-Impossible! [17:40] G     We thoroughly investigated the ships they     arrived in! They're still under watch! [17:44] G     The Army should have control     of Earth's main weapons, too. [17:46] G     Where did you keep something     like that hidden? [17:49] Nb     Three minutes until launch. [17:51] Nb     One, two, three... [17:55] Nb     Run away from here immediately! [17:58] G     Is it inside his stomach? [18:00] Shi     I've heard that Earth samurai     have weapons in their bellies. [18:05] Nb     Fifteen, sixteen, seventeen... [18:05] Shi     Apparently, that weapon they're prepared     to die to use is as powerful as a nuke. [18:11] Shi     I see. [18:13] Shi     So this is the samurai's lethal weapon, [18:16] Shi     disembowelment! [18:17] Kat     Nope. [18:18] Sak     It's a bowel movement. [18:19] G     Disembowelment? Wh-What is that? [18:23] Shi     I don't know exactly,     but guessing from his stance, [18:27] Shi     it's a weapon that converts whatever's     in his stomach into energy [18:30] Shi     and fires it out of his butt. [18:33] Kat     Uh, that's pretty much... [18:35] Sak     It's poop. [18:36] G     How can we stop it? [18:38] Shi     I don't know how exactly, [18:40] Shi     but taking in fiber and the     like to clear the bowels [18:45] Shi     should mitigate its impact. [18:47] Kat     Uh, that's exactly... [18:49] Sak     It's poop. [18:50] G     I-It's a bluff! [18:52] G     No way can he launch something as powerful     as a nuke from this stupid pose. [18:56] G     Seize him! [18:57] Nb     No! [18:58] Nb     Not there! [19:02] G     J-Just getting close made them... [19:04] G     It's the real deal! [19:05] G     It's a real disembowelment! [19:07] Shi     Evacuate at once! [19:09] Shi     Issue a level one alarm! [19:11] Shi     Get away from S.S. Heavenly     Bird at full speed! [19:17] G     A-Admiral? [19:18] G     What are you doing? [19:19] Shi     Hurry up and go. [19:21] Shi     I cannot abandon my ship. [19:23] G     Admiral! [19:25] Shi     It seems I underestimated you earthlings. [19:29] Shi     I never expected you to be prepared to     kill yourself for these negotiations. [19:33] Shi     Your resolve was splendid. [19:36] Shi     I was lacking in proper etiquette. [19:38] Shi     When someone risks their     life to challenge you, [19:41] Shi     my planet's etiquette dictates that you     must respond by risking your own life. [19:45] Shi     I too shall risk my life [19:49] Shi     to put an end to this pointless conflict. [19:52] Shi     The real negotiations start now! [19:57] G     Is that a counter-disembowelment? [19:58] G     What the heck is a counter-disembowelment? [20:00] G     I don't know exactly, but     when the enemy fires his, [20:03] G     he'll probably fire his own     disembowelment to neutralize it. [20:06] G     Can the admiral really use disembowelment? [20:09] G     I don't know, but... [20:11] Shi     Whoa! [20:13] Shi     I feel like I can release     something right now! [20:16] Shi     Is this... Is this... [20:20] Kat     Nope. [20:21] Sak     It's poop. [20:36] G     Admiral? [20:37] G     What's the matter, Admiral? [20:39] G     What happened? [20:42] Shi     Uh, can I ask you something? [20:46] Shi     What exactly is disembowelment? [20:50] Nb     Dunno. [20:51] Shi     Of course you don't! [20:52] Shi     I knew all along! There's no     way it could've been true! [20:57] Shi     Well, the guys don't seem     to have realized yet, [21:01] Shi     so please don't tell them, okay? [21:04] Nb     Very well. But in return... [21:07] Shi     I know. I'll talk to the others     and make the negotiations easier. [21:12] Nb     No, before that... [21:14] KatSak     Could you let him use your toilet? [21:22] KatSak     Go dump as much as you want. [21:30] Kat     These negotiations temporarily softened     the Liberation Army's stance. SIGN    Well done. [21:35] Kat     A peaceful resolution to the riots [21:37] Kat     and greater discipline from the     army were among the promises made, [21:40] Kat     but we couldn't get them to withdraw     their troops stationed on Earth. [21:44] Kat     But our biggest gain this time [21:47] Kat     might be the reliable friend we     made in the Liberation Army. [21:52] Shi     Don't tell anyone. SIGN    Abarenbo Admiral [21:53] Nb     Right back at you. SIGN    Abarenbo Shogun [21:54] Shi     It's a promise, okay? [21:56] Nb     You keep your promise too, okay? [21:58] Kat     That's about it. [21:59] Kat     We couldn't stop the war, but it     wasn't bad for a first meeting. [22:03] Kat     Well? How'd you like our negotiation skills? [22:08] Shin     Uh, it was poop. SIGN    To Be Continued SIGN    Preview [23:44] Shi     That's a real disembowelment, huh? [23:48] Gin     If we don't defeat them, this will never end. SIGN    Silver Soul Arc SIGN    A Delinquent's Kid Has Long Neck Hair SIGN    Sorry it was SIGN    pretty much poop. SIGN    Next time, the biggest fish, Utsuro, shows up. SIGN    Another new character appears, too.