# 333 - Life, Death, and Shades / All the Answers Can Be Found in the Field
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[01:34] Gol**
Don't do it. You'll be mincemeat
if you fall from this high up.
**[01:38] Mad**
Don't get the wrong idea.
**[01:39] Mad**
I just want to know if I
still have the wings to fly.
**[01:44] Mad**
And I came here to find out, is all.
**[01:49] Gol**
Life is precious. Don't throw it away.
***SIGN*** Life, Death, and Shades
**[01:55] Mad**
Look who's talking!
**[01:57] Mad**
You totally wanna lay waste to a life!
**[01:59] Mad**
You're totally trying to kill someone,
right? You're an assassin, aren't you?!
**[02:02] Gol**
Don't get the wrong idea.
I'm just here to hunt boars.
**[02:04] Mad**
From how far away are you
trying to hunt boars?!
**[02:08] Mad**
Really, don't be stupid.
Don't commit a murder.
**[02:11] Gol**
I don't wanna hear that from a suicidal man.
**[02:12] Mad**
I don't wanna hear that from an assassin!
**[02:13] Gol**
I don't wanna hear that from a
man wearing filthy-ass shades.
**[02:15] Mad**
I don't wanna hear that from
a man wearing lame-ass shades!
**[02:17] Gol**
Your shades are more lame.
**[02:18] Mad**
Nah, your shades are more lame.
**[02:21] Gol**
Let me be honest.
**[02:23] Gol**
I couldn't care less what kind of shades
you wear, or when and where you wear them.
**[02:26] Mad**
We're talking about shades now?!
**[02:28] Gol**
Besides, do you really
have it in you to jump?
**[02:34] Gol**
You've been doing this every
day for the past month.
**[02:41] Mad**
Even though I want to die,
**[02:43] Mad**
thinking about shades smashing into
the ground makes my shades tremble.
**[02:49] Mad**
You're an assassin, right?
**[02:51] Mad**
Do you know a way to die that isn't scary
or sad and doesn't hurt or break shades?
**[02:55] Gol**
You're basically saying you don't wanna die.
**[02:58] Mad**
If nothing else, I want my shades to live on!
**[03:01] Gol**
Can't you just take them off before you die?
**[03:03] Gol**
I'm an assassin, you know.
**[03:04] Gol**
If I stop to think about how my
victims feel, I couldn't do my—
**[03:07] Mad**
Oh, I know!
**[03:08] Mad**
I could just have you kill me!
**[03:11] Gol**
Wha—
**[03:11] Mad**
You could send me to heaven in one shot,
without letting me feel any pain or fear!
**[03:16] Gol**
Screw you. Do you have any idea how much
money is involved in each of my shots?
**[03:20] Gol**
I don't waste my rounds.
**[03:22] Gol**
Be it when I'm killing my targets
**[03:23] Gol**
or when I'm making love to women.
**[03:26] Gol**
All it takes is one shot.
It's over in an instant.
**[03:29] G**
Huh? Done already, CEO?
**[03:31] Gol**
That's my creed.
***SIGN*** One and Done
**[03:33] Gol**
and that's where my moniker of
"One and Done Synshen" comes from.
***SIGN*** Synshen
**[03:36] Mad**
They're just mocking you for
shooting your load early!
**[03:39] Mad**
Guess I'll have to kill myself
right here and now, then.
**[03:41] Gol**
Wait, wait.
**[03:42] Gol**
How about this?
**[03:43] Gol**
You head to the roof of that skyscraper now.
***SIGN*** Welcome to Earth!!
**[03:46] Gol**
My target is taking part in
a welcoming party there.
**[03:49] Mad**
You're really hunting a boar?!
**[03:51] Gol**
Once I give the signal, jump off the roof.
**[03:55] Gol**
When you fall into my crosshairs
that will be aimed at my target,
***SIGN*** Me
***SIGN*** Boar
**[03:58] Gol**
I will pierce you both through with one shot.
**[04:00] Gol**
That should do, right?
**[04:01] Mad**
Aren't you making this too hard for yourself?
**[04:04] Mad**
And the shades are being
smashed to bits anyway!
**[04:08] Mad**
I guess around here is fine.
**[04:10] Mad**
Now I just have to wait for the signal.
**[04:13] Mad**
With this, I can finally go to heaven—
**[04:14] Gol2**
Don't do it.
**[04:16] Gol2**
You'll be mincemeat if you
fall from this high up.
**[04:18] Gol2**
Put yourself in the shoes of the lady
who runs the cutlet place down there.
**[04:21] Gol2**
Actually, before all that...
**[04:25] Gol2**
Life is precious. Don't throw it away.
**[04:27] Mad**
*Really?! Here, too?!*
**[04:29] Mad**
*There's an assassin here, too?!*
**[04:32] Gol2**
If you don't want to die, leave at once.
**[04:35] Mad**
*But I do want to die!*
**[04:37] Gol2**
I hear that One and Done Synshen
is targeting this building.
**[04:41] Mad**
* Could he be an assassin hired*
* by Synshen's enemy to kill him?*
**[04:45] Mad**
* I have to go tell him right now, or the*
* assassin who's gonna kill me will lose his...*
**[04:50] Mad**
Wait.
**[04:54] Gol2**
I see. Synshen is on that rooftop.
**[04:58] Gol2**
I must thank you for telling me.
**[05:00] Mad**
Oh, you can just shoot
me in the head in return.
**[05:05] Gol2**
Sorry, but I can't do that.
**[05:07] Gol2**
Even an assassin has his creed.
**[05:09] Gol2**
The only people I kill are
scumbags like Synshen.
**[05:13] Gol2**
Be it targets or women,
**[05:15] Gol2**
I don't go after those on
the straight and narrow.
**[05:17] G**
Huh? Done already, CEO?
**[05:19] Gol2**
That's where my moniker
"Quickdraw Synron" comes from.
***SIGN*** Quickdraw
***SIGN*** Synron
**[05:22] Mad**
Your moniker has nothing
to do with your creed!
**[05:24] Mad**
Are all assassins too
quick to shoot their loads?
**[05:26] Gol2**
How about we do this?
**[05:27] Gol2**
You head back to that building
**[05:30] Gol2**
and lure Synshen somewhere I can snipe him
**[05:34] Gol2**
using a scummy tactic.
**[05:36] Gol2**
If you do that, I promise to shoot
both you scumbags in the head.
**[05:41] Mad**
*This has gotten even more complicated!*
**[05:44] Mad**
*I came here to die!*
**[05:46] Mad**
* Why am I playing accomplice*
* in an assassination?!*
**[05:50] Mad**
S-Synshen...
**[05:52] Mad**
They got me.
**[05:54] Mad**
Run away.
**[05:56] Mad**
The enemy already has the
entire city under its control.
**[06:00] Mad**
I wanted to let you know that
your life is in grave danger...
**[06:06] Gol**
Hey, hang in there!
**[06:08] Mad**
B-Before I die, could you take me up there?
**[06:13] Gol**
Just wait.
**[06:14] Mad**
*Hell yeah! He fell for it!*
**[06:17] Gol**
I'll get you to a hospital right away.
**[06:19] Mad**
No, forget that. Just take
me up there before I die.
**[06:23] Gol**
You moron! Don't be so quick
to say you're gonna die!
**[06:26] Mad**
*Why is he so full of passion?!*
**[06:28] Gol**
I told you that I'd kill you.
**[06:30] Gol**
Don't you dare die until then.
**[06:31] Mad**
*He's a much nicer guy than I thought!*
**[06:34] Mad**
W-Wait. Aren't you a professional assassin?
**[06:37] Mad**
Are you sure you should
leave your job unfinished?
**[06:39] Gol**
What do you think is more important?
A job, or a person's life?
**[06:42] Mad**
* And who was it that was taking*
* people's lives on the job?*
**[06:46] Gol**
Damn those scumbags.
**[06:47] Mad**
* Uh, you're the scumbag.*
* Don't forget where you stand.*
**[06:50] Gol**
First they take my sister, and now
they want to take my friend, too?
**[06:53] Mad**
*When did we become friends?!*
**[06:56] Gol**
What's going on?
**[06:58] Gol**
Is there a sniper on that rooftop, too?
**[07:00] Mad**
* Sorry, Synron-san!*
* This is as far as I can go!*
**[07:02] Mad**
*I mean, he's actually a really nice guy!*
**[07:05] Gol**
I'll be the decoy.
**[07:06] Gol**
In the meantime, you use this
to take out that sniper.
**[07:09] Mad**
*Asking a half-dead guy to kill someone?*
**[07:11] Mad**
* I can't tell if he's a nice*
* guy or a bad guy anymore!*
**[07:14] Gol**
Don't die.
**[07:15] Mad**
*Like I said, I came here to die!*
**[07:18] Mad**
*What the hell is going on?!*
**[07:20] Mad**
*I came here to die!*
**[07:22] Mad**
*I don't care anymore! I'll kill or whatever!*
**[07:25] Mad**
* If I actually try to kill*
* Synron, I'm sure he'll kill me.*
**[07:30] Mad**
*He's already dead!*
**[07:32] Mad**
Hey! What are you doing?
**[07:35] Gol2**
S-Sorry, I screwed up.
**[07:38] Gol2**
I panicked and rushed to kill Synshen,
but I failed to notice my rounds were gone.
**[07:43] Mad**
He took that chance to hit you?
**[07:45] Gol2**
No, like I said...
**[07:48] Gol2**
I lost my rounds.
**[07:50] Mad**
That really is one hell of a screw-up!
**[07:51] Gol2**
If I don't have any rounds, I can't kill you.
**[07:55] Mad**
You don't need those round ones for that.
**[07:57] Gol**
I'm no longer fit to be a sniper.
**[08:00] G**
Huh? Done already, CEO?
**[08:01] Mad**
You were never fit and firing there anyway!
**[08:04] Gol**
But it's fine.
**[08:06] Gol**
Even if I did have the rounds,
I wouldn't have been able to fire.
**[08:10] Gol**
Some scumbag he was.
**[08:12] Gol**
I can't believe he acted like that in front
of his enemy in the middle of a hit job.
**[08:17] Gol**
Do you know why my boss is
being targeted by Synshen?
**[08:21] ---**
This is what people call him behind his back:
**[08:24] ---**
"slave trader."
**[08:26] ---**
The stuff he peddles includes people
**[08:30] ---**
and Synshen's kid sister who was
with him when he was an orphan.
**[08:35] ---**
Only then did he start walking
down the path of a scumbag.
**[08:39] ---**
So when I saw him do that,
I realized something.
**[08:43] ---**
He came here as a brother
trying to save his sister.
**[08:47] ---**
Could you tell him something for me?
**[08:50] ---**
"I don't have the rounds
to shoot you with anymore,
**[08:55] ---**
but I still have enough
to unload into scumbags!"
**[09:00] Mad**
*Unload those into me, not scumbags!*
**[09:04] Mad**
*I'm done with this crap!*
**[09:05] Mad**
*I'm just gonna jump off the roof!*
**[09:11] Gol**
It's been 20 years since we were sold off.
**[09:14] Gol**
Our appearances have changed
completely since then,
**[09:16] Gol**
and we even cast our names aside,
**[09:19] Gol**
but it seems we both chose to walk down
the same path to get our sibling back.
**[09:24] Gol**
You don't have the rounds
to shoot me with anymore?
**[09:26] Gol**
Ichiko, you never had any
round ones to begin with.
**[09:31] Boar**
You siblings would've been
better off killing each other.
**[09:35] Boar**
If you two can't settle things
yourselves, I can help.
**[09:40] Gol**
You were always like that, Ichiko.
**[09:43] Gol**
You loved to dress up like
a boy and play with us.
**[09:49] (Flashback) Gol2**
You're so mean, Ichiro-nii!
**[09:51] (Flashback) Gol2**
I'm out of water here!
**[09:55] (Flashback) Gol**
That's why I keep telling you...
**[09:56] Gol**
You're too quick to shoot your load.
**[09:59] (Flashback) Gol2**
Jeez! How can I win, then?
**[10:02] (Flashback) Gol**
Isn't that obvious?
**[10:06] Gol**
You put everything you have into one shot.
**[10:11] Boar**
Is he going to shoot me
along with his sister?
**[10:14] Gol**
Get ready for my best shot.
**[10:18] Gol**
Because I've already fired it.
**[10:20] Mad**
If you can kill me, I'd like to see you try!
**[10:36] Mad**
Man, in the end...
**[10:40] Mad**
I didn't die!
**[10:49] Gol**
Looks like your wings are still right there.
**[10:56] Mat**
In our job, fieldwork is everything.
***SIGN*** Special Crash Course for Upper Management Candidates
**[11:00] Mat**
But in any organization, the skilled
employees are the first to leave the field
**[11:04] Mat**
and take up leadership roles.
**[11:07] Mat**
All of you master investigators will
learn how the nectar of authority tastes.
**[11:13] Mat**
But I didn't promote you just so you could rot.
**[11:18] Mat**
What I'm basically trying to say is,
**[11:20] Mat**
no matter how far up the ladder you climb,
**[11:23] Mat**
never forget the field where you came from.
**[11:25] Hij**
Pearls of wisdom from the super boss who
spends taxpayer money on cabaret clubs.
**[11:30] Kon**
Don't be like that, Toshi.
**[11:32] Hij**
We don't need a crash course.
We're drowning in fieldwork every day.
**[11:39] Hij**
I mean, we're full of idiots who think
desk work means sleeping on a desk.
**[11:44] Hij**
And who is he calling master investigators?
**[11:47] Hij**
These useless rich kids who landed comfy
jobs using their family names and contacts?
**[11:51] Kon**
Hey, Toshi! They can hear you!
**[11:53] Hij**
I want them to.
**[11:55] Hij**
Oh, sorry. You're a rich kid from
a famous family too, aren't you...
**[12:00] Hij**
Mimawarigumi Chief Sasaki-dono?
**[12:03] Isa**
No need to worry, Shinsengumi
Vice Chief Hijikata-dono.
**[12:08] Isa**
Once I become director-general, I'll effect
elite reform by the elite for the elite.
**[12:14] Isa**
For starters, maybe I should
fire that napping thorny
**[12:16] Isa**
and the dummy spreading secondhand smoke.
**[12:20] Isa**
Don't you agree, Nobume-san?
**[12:23] Hij**
Elite reform, my ass! Your subordinate
is napping in class, too!
**[12:27] Nob**
I'm not napping.
**[12:29] Nob**
I'm snacking.
***SIGN*** Japanese for Good Kids
**[12:30] Hij**
They're both equally bad!
**[12:31] Oki**
Hate to break it to ya,
but I'm not napping, either.
**[12:34] Oki**
I was pretending so people wouldn't figure
out during recess that I have no friends.
**[12:38] Hij**
Why the triumphant look?
**[12:40] Hij**
Why are you two competing over school tropes?
**[12:42] Hij**
Also, a guy messing with his phone during
a lecture has no right to complain to me.
**[12:46] Isa**
I'm merely noting down the important points.
**[12:49] Hij**
And I'm using nicotine to clear
my head so I can pay attention!
**[12:52] Isa**
Crap, game over.
**[12:54] Hij**
So you were just playing a mobile game!
**[12:57] Mat**
Keep it down, you louts!
**[13:00] Mat**
Beat it to the hallway
in under three seconds,
**[13:03] Mat**
or I'll blow your brains out.
**[13:05] Mat**
One...
***SIGN*** All the Answers
Can Be Found in the Field
**[13:07] All**
What happened to two and three?!
***SIGN*** Special Crash Course for Upper Management Candidates
**[13:11] Mat**
So, yeah...
**[13:14] Mat**
We'll have these guys act as guinea pigs,
experience a crime scene, and investigate.
**[13:19] Mat**
It's just a simulation, but I want you
all to rack your brains along with them.
**[13:22] Hij**
I don't care if it's a simulation
or whatever. Bring it on.
**[13:25] Isa**
Yes, though we'd rather not be compared
to these people. Right, Nobume-san?
***SIGN*** Records of the Three Kingdoms
**[13:29] Nob**
If you defeat Cao Cao
early, you lose motivation
**[13:32] Nob**
and stop caring about uniting China.
**[13:34] Oki**
Cao Cao can be the last boss, then.
Whoever defeats Wei first wins.
**[13:38] Kon**
Okay, he said simulation, but not that kind!
**[13:40] Mat**
A fictional crime scene
will be displayed in VR.
**[13:43] Mat**
Analyze the crime using the clues at
the scene and identify the culprit.
**[13:52] Kon**
Wh-What is this?
**[13:54] Kon**
It's like the real thing!
**[13:56] Mat**
This is HQ, you know. We have
all the cutting-edge tech.
**[14:00] Mat**
And we have files on every
kind of case imaginable.
**[14:03] Mat**
This case, based on a massive amount of
data, is no different from the real thing.
**[14:09] Mat**
Here's the gist of it. A corpse
was found on this river bank.
**[14:13] Mat**
An old lady living nearby
was the first to find it.
**[14:16] Mat**
She testified that she was here to do laundry
when she saw it drift by from upstream.
**[14:26] Kon**
What kind of case is this?!
**[14:28] Kon**
HQ's case files clearly have
folktales from Japan mixed in!
**[14:32] Mat**
I hear a similar case happened in the past.
**[14:34] Kon**
Like hell it did! This is Momotaro!
**[14:37] Hij**
We don't know for sure
that this is Momotaro yet.
**[14:40] Kon**
Uh, he obviously is.
He was even inside a peach.
**[14:42] Hij**
Acting on misconceptions
can lead to mistakes.
**[14:45] Kon**
The granny was here to do laundry!
**[14:47] Hij**
Pops, was the peach already
split when it was found?
**[14:51] Mat**
Granny testified that she pulled it out
in this state when it came drifting by.
**[14:55] Kon**
We're actually doing this? We're
investigating this stupid case?
**[14:58] Hij**
That's weird.
**[14:59] Hij**
If he came drifting by in this state,
Momotaro's body should be wet.
**[15:04] Kon**
You just called him Momotaro.
You admitted it is him, right?
**[15:06] Hij**
Also, can an old lady really drag a
peach with an adult inside all this way?
**[15:12] Hij**
There's something off here.
**[15:13] Kon**
Yeah, like an adult being inside a peach!
**[15:16] Hij**
The granny probably wasn't
alone when she found this.
**[15:20] Hij**
What is Gramps's alibi?
**[15:21] Mat**
Cutting grass in the mountains.
**[15:22] Kon**
That was an alibi?!
**[15:24] Kon**
It was something that scary?
***SIGN*** Old Man Possession 1
***SIGN*** Sickle
**[15:26] Hij**
Pops, get us a DNA comparison on
Gramps's sickle and Momotaro's blood.
**[15:30] Kon**
What are you thinking? That's terrifying!
**[15:32] Hij**
The fatal wound matches the
way the peach was split.
**[15:35] Hij**
In other words, he was killed by the
old couple when they split the peach.
**[15:40] Kon**
What the hell kind of folktale is this?!
**[15:42] Hij**
They didn't do it on purpose.
It was an accident.
**[15:45] Hij**
But that's why they fabricated alibis...
**[15:47] Isa**
You're mistaken.
**[15:49] Isa**
It seems you're the one who is
shackled by the story of Momotaro.
**[15:53] Isa**
That's why you overlooked
a vital piece of evidence.
**[15:56] Hij**
What?
**[15:57] Isa**
You're too fixated on the man inside
the peach, the granny's laundry,
**[16:00] Isa**
and Gramps's grass cutting.
**[16:02] Isa**
Hence, you assumed that this tragedy
occurred at the start of the Momotaro story.
**[16:07] Isa**
But that's a mistake. Why, you ask?
**[16:11] Isa**
Ask yourself, why is Momotaro so big when
he was only just born from the peach?
**[16:16] Kon**
You're taking issue with that now?!
**[16:18] Kon**
You ignore the "born from a peach"
thing and take issue with that?!
**[16:21] Kon**
And why are you shocked?!
**[16:23] Isa**
Going from his filthy clothes
and the lack of kibi dango,
**[16:27] Isa**
we can tell that he'd already
finished fighting the ogres.
**[16:31] Isa**
This incident happened
after the end of the story.
**[16:34] Hij**
Then why was he inside a peach again?
**[16:37] Isa**
Look at this wound.
**[16:39] Isa**
There's pretty much no sign of blood loss.
**[16:42] Isa**
This proves that he was already
dead when he got the wound.
**[16:46] Isa**
What that means is...
**[16:48] Isa**
Somebody killed him and
dumped him in the river
**[16:51] Isa**
in order to frame that old couple for murder.
**[16:54] Kon**
Why is this getting so complicated?!
**[16:56] Isa**
It was all camouflage.
**[16:59] Isa**
But thanks to that, we can narrow
down the list of suspects.
**[17:02] Isa**
When you consider Momotaro's
situation after fighting the ogres,
**[17:06] Isa**
the true culprit
**[17:09] Isa**
can only be one of these three.
**[17:12] Isa**
It is said that Momotaro's party
brought back treasure from Onigashima.
**[17:17] Isa**
But we're talking about animals
and a peach-born monster here.
**[17:20] Isa**
It's not hard to picture them
fighting over the treasure.
**[17:24] Kon**
How much must you corrupt Momotaro
before you're satisfied?
**[17:26] Isa**
Among them, the only one who can place
such a cunning trap is the mon—
**[17:29] Oki**
It wasn't the monkey.
**[17:32] Oki**
Shackled by the story of Momotaro,
you overlooked something vital.
**[17:39] Oki**
Monkeys can't use money.
**[17:42] Kon**
Why does Captain Obvious
have such a smug look?!
**[17:44] Kon**
Their reasoning is getting
stupider by the minute!
**[17:47] Kon**
And why do you have a look of shock?!
**[17:49] Oki**
In other words, the real culprit
is either the dog or the pheasant.
**[17:54] Kon**
Dogs and pheasants can't use money, either!
**[17:56] Nob**
You're wrong.
**[17:58] Nob**
None of them is the culprit.
**[18:01] Nob**
You're so shackled by the Momotaro
story that you've gone blind.
**[18:05] Oki**
What? How can you say for sure?
**[18:08] Nob**
Because that'd be a pain.
**[18:10] Kon**
She ultimately wrote it off as a pain!
**[18:13] Kon**
Anyone would look shocked after that!
**[18:16] Hij**
Well, they're all animals either way.
Can't really question them.
**[18:19] Hij**
Pops, I'd like to see the autopsy report.
**[18:21] Hij**
There must be another fatal wound somewhere.
**[18:24] Mat**
Sorry to say this, Toshi,
**[18:26] Mat**
but this is the only external
wound that stands out.
**[18:29] Mat**
However, x-rays did find something
strange in his trachea.
**[18:35] Mat**
Something shaped like a dango.
**[18:37] Kon**
Uh, he totally died choking on kibi dango!
**[18:40] Isa**
This is why I can't stand plebs.
That's not kibi dango.
**[18:42] Isa**
It's what the monkey pooped out
after eating the kibi dango.
**[18:45] Isa**
You know how monkeys throw their own poop?
I knew it, the monkey was the culprit.
**[18:48] Isa**
I was right. An elite was right.
**[18:50] Isa**
Praise the elite.
**[18:51] Kon**
You're not thinking like an elite now!
**[18:52] Hij**
You stupid? The gramps and gran would
obviously be the ones feeding him.
**[18:57] Hij**
Tempted by the treasure, they choked
him to death using kibi dango.
**[19:01] Hij**
The old farts really were
the culprits. I was right.
**[19:03] Hij**
Praise mayonnaise.
**[19:04] Kon**
Didn't you paint them in a
totally different light before?
**[19:06] Isa**
The monkey.
**[19:07] Hij**
Gramps and gran.
**[19:08] Isa**
The monkey.
**[19:09] Hij**
Gramps and gran.
**[19:10] Isa**
The monkey's gramps and gran.
**[19:11] Hij**
Gramps and gran's monkey.
**[19:13] Isa**
We agreed it was the monkey just now, right?
**[19:15] Oki**
Okay, fine. Let's take the middle option
and say it was the eunuch monkey.
**[19:19] Kon**
Middle option of what?
Where'd the gramps and gran go?
**[19:21] Nob**
It can be Monkey and Aska's
gramps and gran, then.
**[19:24] Kon**
Wait, what happened to Chage?
**[19:25] Isa**
At this point, let's settle
this once and for all.
**[19:28] Isa**
Director-General, it doesn't
matter if they're animals.
**[19:31] Isa**
Let us question Momotaro's party.
**[19:33] Mat**
Oh, if you want them...
**[19:37] Mat**
They're in here.
**[19:38] Kon**
All the suspects have been eaten!
**[19:40] Isa**
Wait, are you saying Momotaro
was the perpetrator?
**[19:45] Isa**
I see. So that's how it is.
**[19:49] Isa**
They were stranded on the
way back from Onigashima.
**[19:54] Isa**
The sad fate of his party is proof enough.
**[19:58] Isa**
Instead of treasure, they fought to eat
each other's kibi dango and bodies.
**[20:04] Isa**
And almost like divine punishment,
**[20:08] Isa**
the last bite, his friend's kibi
dango, got caught in his throat.
**[20:14] Isa**
The one who killed him was
none other than himself.
**[20:19] Kon**
No way... That can't be.
**[20:21] Kon**
How can such a laughable cause of
death turn into something so sad?
**[20:27] Kon**
Toshi...
**[20:28] Hij**
This is what the field is like.
**[20:31] Hij**
It shoves harsh realities and even
harsher truths right into our faces.
**[20:37] Hij**
But we must not avert our eyes.
**[20:40] Hij**
As cops, we have the duty to find the
truth even if it's shrouded in darkness.
**[20:47] Kon**
T-Toshi!
**[20:51] Hij**
Look at this.
***SIGN*** No sneaking bites.
**[20:53] Hij**
It's a bag.
**[20:54] Hij**
It likely had kibi dango inside.
**[20:57] Hij**
He probably didn't eat a single dango.
***SIGN*** No sneaking bites.
**[21:02] Hij**
He must've given them all to his friends
and chewed on his sandals or something.
**[21:06] Hij**
But they went down one after another.
**[21:09] Hij**
Considering how he could eat crap like this,
**[21:11] Hij**
he must've ended up being the last one alive.
**[21:14] Hij**
The rest of the story is as you said.
**[21:17] Hij**
He chose that path in order to live.
**[21:20] Hij**
You can't eat a bag like this
unless you have extreme resolve.
**[21:25] Hij**
He must've really wanted to live...
**[21:26] Hij**
His friends' share of life, too.
**[21:29] Kon**
Toshi...
**[21:30] Isa**
Are you saying that sappy crap
was the kind of reality you saw?
**[21:35] Hij**
That's right.
**[21:36] Hij**
This is the truth I believe in,
the truth I found at this crime scene!
**[21:39] Mat**
Bzzt.
**[21:44] Mat**
Too bad. Close, but no cigar.
**[21:48] Mat**
You got the "Momotaro was killed" part right.
**[21:51] Mat**
But this isn't Momotaro.
**[21:56] Mat**
It's the boss of Onigashima, who ate
the entire Momotaro party alive.
**[22:00] Mat**
Disguised as Momotaro, he came to
the mainland to eat more humans...
**[22:05] Mat**
But he died without achieving his goal.
***SIGN*** Cause of Death
**[22:07] Mat**
Basically,
**[22:10] Mat**
the real culprit is a brain tumor. That's it.
**[22:15] Mat**
That's it.
***SIGN*** The End
**[22:17] Mat**
That's it!
***SIGN*** 3000 Leagues in Search of a Scabbard
**[23:50] Gin**
Next time: "3000 Leagues
in Search of a Scabbard."
***SIGN*** Sure, it's been a while since we've seen Tetsuko,
***SIGN*** but she has a fair amount of screen time, like in the live-action movie.
***SIGN*** Perhaps because he treated swords like crap at a smithy,
***SIGN*** Gintoki's butthole gets attacked by one!