# Season 8
# 317 - The Monster and the Monster's Child
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:08] Gin**
Here we are.
**[00:10] Gin**
It's the late night slot.
***SIGN*** Late
Night
**[00:11] [SONG] Sign**
Goodbye, Red-Haired Esper
***SIGN*** The Goddess of the Night
***SIGN*** "No Airing the Nitty-Gritties of Ketsuno Ana!"
After predicting heavy rain once again for tonight,
Ketsuno Ana does a surprise raid on Snack Bar Smile"
**[00:15] Kag**
This place is kinda dusty.
**[00:17] Gin**
Deal with it.
**[00:19] Kag**
What's this?
**[00:20] Gin**
Probably something the previous
occupant left behind.
***SIGN*** To the Late Night Slot
**[00:23] Gin**
Now, then...
**[00:25] Gin**
Shinpachi.
**[00:26] Shin**
Yes?
**[00:27] Gin**
This is a late night slot.
**[00:29] Gin**
We'll need to greet the
viewers appropriately.
**[00:30] Shin**
Right.
**[00:32] Gin**
Hello to all you night owls
watching the television.
**[00:35] Gin**
The Gintama anime will now resume
in its late night incarnation.
**[00:38] Gin**
One, two...
**[00:40] Gin**
Gilgamesh!
**[00:41] Shin**
You just wanted to do that, didn't you?!
***SIGN*** Please watch this program in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!!!!!
**[00:49] (Flashback) Gin**
Ow...
**[00:50] (Flashback) Gin**
Damn, not yet.
**[00:52] (Flashback) Gin**
My sword ain't broken yet.
**[00:56] (Flashback) Gin**
One more time,
**[00:58] (Flashback) Gin**
Shoyo!
**[01:06] (Flashback) Sho**
You nearly had me there, Gintoki.
**[01:08] (Flashback) Gin**
Where, exactly?
**[01:10] (Flashback) Sho**
There.
**[01:11] (Flashback) Gin**
Could you be more specific?
**[01:12] (Flashback) Sho**
Right around there.
**[01:14] (Flashback) Gin**
How can I be as strong as you, Shoyo?
**[01:18] (Flashback) Gin**
I'd never lost until I met you,
not even to grown-ups.
**[01:22] (Flashback) Gin**
But you're far less simple than a grown-up.
**[01:26] (Flashback) Gin**
You're a giant.
**[01:27] (Flashback) Sho**
You're wrong, Gintoki. I am...
**[01:31] (Flashback) Sho**
a Hanshin fan.
**[01:32] (Flashback) Gin**
Would you listen to me?
**[01:34] (Flashback) Gin**
I'm saying I've never seen a monster like you.
**[01:37] (Flashback) Gin**
What the hell were you up to before we met?
**[01:41] (Flashback) Gin**
Who the hell are you?
**[01:45] (Flashback) Sho**
You were called the "Corpse-Eating
Devil," so you should understand.
**[01:49] (Flashback) Sho**
There's no difference between a
monster and the child of a monster.
**[01:53] (Flashback) Sho**
They are both inhuman beings that are
only born within a bloody pool of sin.
**[01:58] (Flashback) Sho**
And a monster's sword cannot
cut another monster.
**[02:01] (Flashback) Sho**
So, Gintoki,
**[02:03] (Flashback) Sho**
stop trying to grow stronger by imitating me.
**[02:07] (Flashback) Sho**
I'm not going to teach you how to
wield the sword like me, either.
**[02:11] (Flashback) Sho**
You have to grow stronger
than me using your own sword,
**[02:14] (Flashback) Sho**
the sword of a human.
**[02:18] (Flashback) Sho**
I expect great things from you.
**[02:21] (Flashback) Sho**
Someday, hopefully...
**[02:24] U**
You'll come cut down the monster that I am.
**[02:32] U**
It's too bad.
**[02:33] U**
Like I said, a monster's sword...
**[02:37] U**
Your sword can't reach me.
**[02:52] Gin**
Just a dream, huh?
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
**[04:32] Kat**
Elizabeth! An enemy attack?
**[04:33] Gin**
That's right.
**[04:35] Gin**
A seriously lethal weapon
was about to pierce my skull.
**[04:38] Kat**
What?
**[04:40] Kat**
The evil arm of the bakufu extends all the
way to this underground town of Akiba?
**[04:43] Kat**
But rest assured, Gintoki.
**[04:44] Kat**
We will protect your life in hiding.
**[04:48] Kat**
Don't let a single rat
get close to the hideout!
**[04:50] Kat**
Don't you dare let anyone
find out Gintoki is here!
**[04:54] Gin**
Even from space, you could
tell this is a hideout!
**[04:56] Gin**
Go look up the word "hiding"
in the dictionary!
**[04:58] Gin**
Like I need all your nasty b*lls
lined up in that tiny-ass room!
**[05:01] Gin**
I never asked you morons to be my bodyguards.
**[05:04] Kat**
Even if you didn't, nobody would
leave their group's ace to die.
**[05:08] Gin**
I don't recall becoming any group's ace.
**[05:10] Kat**
It's too late to play that card now, Gintoki.
**[05:13] Kat**
You charged into Edo Castle,
**[05:15] Kat**
got into a huge fight with the bakufu army,
and threw Lord Sadasada out of power.
**[05:18] Kat**
You insulted and harassed the former
shogun, Shigeshige, many a time,
**[05:22] Kat**
and even punched his successor,
Nobunobu, injuring him gravely.
**[05:25] Kat**
You took part in the Shinsengumi's mutiny
**[05:27] Kat**
and helped them rescue their commander,
Kondo Isao, from the bakufu.
**[05:31] Kat**
Even among the Joi Rebels, nobody else
has pulled off so many acts of terror!
**[05:35] Kat**
You're a terrorist, and a far more radical
one than Takasugi and me, at that!
**[05:39] Kat**
There's no going back for you at this point.
**[05:42] Kat**
You will never have a peaceful life again.
**[05:45] Kat**
You won't even be able to hold your
loved ones with your bloodstained hands!
**[05:48] Kat**
The only thing left in those hands
is a bloody, metallic revolution!
**[05:52] Gin**
Uh, you practically sound like a bad guy.
**[05:55] Gin**
I never committed any acts of terror.
**[05:57] Gin**
I punched a guy who pissed me off, and he
just happened to represent the country.
**[06:01] Gin**
And, since it turned into a big deal,
**[06:02] Gin**
I just tried to cut it
into pieces and bury it.
**[06:05] Gin**
Don't lump me in with you lot.
**[06:06] G**
Forget terrorist, you're
just a homicidal maniac!
**[06:08] Kat**
Do you think you can go back to the
Kabuki District once things calm down?
**[06:12] Kat**
I hate to break it to you,
but that's impossible.
**[06:14] Gin**
Ack!
**[06:15] Gin**
A wanted poster?!
***SIGN*** If this face triggers your memory, call
**[06:16] Gin**
For real? They're circulating these?
**[06:19] Gin**
And that photo just screams violence.
**[06:21] Gin**
Who took this? And when?
**[06:23] Gin**
Isn't this just some
violent impostor in a wig?
**[06:25] Kat**
I'm not an impostor. I'm Katsura.
**[06:27] Gin**
It was you?!
**[06:29] Kat**
The previous photo made
you look way too evil,
**[06:32] Kat**
so I took your guise, showed off your
sweet tooth, and had a fancier one taken.
**[06:35] Gin**
It's supposed to be me eating cake?
**[06:36] Gin**
Just having the cake cut off
made me look so violent?
**[06:40] Kat**
And then I circulated the new one.
**[06:42] Gin**
Recall it!
***SIGN*** If this face triggers your memory, call
**[06:43] Kat**
Don't worry. I altered it.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan Akiba Branch
**[06:47] Shin**
We're Odd Jobs Gin-chan,
and we've expanded into Akiba!
**[06:51] Kag**
Need to collect *Love Live!* bonus items or
sell off your *Love Live! Sunshine!!* goods?
**[06:55] Kag**
You name it, we'll do it!
**[06:57] Kag**
If this face triggers your memory, come see us!
**[07:01] Gin**
Can I do this if I get triggered instead?
**[07:04] Gin**
Reusing wanted posters as store flyers?
Could you make this any more violent?!
**[07:08] Shin**
Now is the time for positive
thinking, Gin-san.
**[07:11] Gin**
What you're doing is more
like primitive thinking!
**[07:13] Kag**
Even when we fall, we don't get back up
for free. That's the Odd Jobs motto.
**[07:16] Gin**
I'll give you money, so stay down!
Never get back up again, please!
**[07:19] Kag**
Don't worry.
**[07:20] Kag**
Akiba folk are just walking corpses who
ironically call themselves Love Livers.
**[07:24] Kag**
Nobody cares about you.
**[07:26] Gin**
You'd better knock it off, or you'll
be wanted by Love Livers, too!
**[07:30] Gin**
Don't look down on Love Livers!
**[07:32] Gin**
Those guys are insane!
**[07:33] Gin**
Not even love survivor ninja robots
would be a match for them!
**[07:35] G**
Oh, hello? Uh...
**[07:37] G**
There's a guy here who looks a lot
like someone on a wanted poster.
**[07:42] G**
Uh, hello?
**[07:46] G**
My phone!
**[07:48] Gin**
Are you stupid?
**[07:48] Nob**
Excuse me. I'm here because I saw the flyer.
**[07:51] Nob**
Odd Jobs Gin-chan Akiba Branch...
**[07:54] Nob**
Mind if I make a request?
**[08:03] Nob**
Looks like you'll need to relocate again,
**[08:06] Nob**
Odd Jobs.
**[08:07] Gin**
Right back at you.
**[08:09] Gin**
I would've thought you'd left Edo long ago.
**[08:12] Gin**
What happened to the Mimawarigumi?
**[08:13] Nob**
I don't have the ability or
right to lead them anymore.
**[08:18] Nob**
A lot of them wanted to repay Kondo Isao
for saving them on the battlefield,
**[08:21] Nob**
so they went with the Shinsengumi.
**[08:24] Nob**
They'll be much better
off with a man like him.
**[08:29] Nob**
I've got my own job to do...
**[08:32] Nob**
As Sasaki Isaburo's comrade,
**[08:36] Nob**
and...
**[08:38] Nob**
as one of Shoyo's pupils.
**[08:43] Nob**
I can't let this country and
that man do what they want.
**[08:48] Gin**
I didn't know I had a junior here.
**[08:51] Gin**
But you know a side of Yoshida
Shoyo that we don't know...
**[08:56] Gin**
You know Utsuro, don't you?
**[08:58] Gin**
Tell us, what did Shoyo—
**[09:01] Gin**
My.
**[09:02] Mat**
Freeze!
**[09:04] Mat**
You betrayed us, Imai Nobume?
**[09:07] Mat**
Why is the White Yaksha here?
**[09:11] Mat**
Y-You're...
**[09:13] Mat**
One of Takasugi's Kiheitai,
**[09:15] Mat**
Kijima ****ko!
**[09:16] Mat**
Why the hell did you bleep that out?!
**[09:18] Mat**
That's misleading! Just say Matako!
**[09:20] Gin**
No, we can't talk about that
in a late night anime.
**[09:23] Gin**
Let's keep the **** under wraps, okay—
**[09:27] Nob**
Put your gun away, D***ko.
**[09:29] Mat**
What did you say?!
**[09:30] Mat**
Did you just use a totally
different four-letter word?!
**[09:32] Mat**
You're the one who should
put her weapon away.
**[09:35] Mat**
The Mimawarigumi was
supposed to be on our side.
**[09:37] Mat**
Why are you with the White Yaksha's gang?
**[09:39] Kat**
Oh, right.
**[09:40] Kat**
Before Nobunobu sold you out,
**[09:43] Kat**
you were working together as the
Hitotsubashi Faction to take over the country.
**[09:49] Nob**
It was Sasaki Isaburo, the individual,
who formed an alliance with you.
**[09:53] Nob**
The Mimawarigumi were only being used.
**[09:57] Nob**
And Isaburo and the Mimawarigumi
are both gone now.
**[10:02] Hen**
So the rumors were true.
**[10:05] Hen**
Good grief.
**[10:07] Hen**
We came here as a last resort,
**[10:10] Hen**
but it seems we don't have
any allies anywhere anymore.
**[10:14] Nob**
You may not have allies here,
but you do have Shoyo's students
**[10:18] Nob**
and the Odd Jobs Akiba Branch,
which will do anything you want.
**[10:22] Gin**
Don't tell me your request is...
**[10:25] Nob**
Tell us.
**[10:26] Nob**
What happened to...
**[10:29] Nob**
the other student of Shoyo's?
**[10:43] Hen**
Nobunobu and the Elders betrayed the
Kiheitai and cut us out of the Harusame,
**[10:49] Hen**
making us nothing but a tiny,
isolated army wandering in space.
**[10:52] Hen**
But even in that crisis, Kamui-dono's
7th Division went on the attack
**[10:58] Hen**
and successfully captured one of the
syndicate's bases, the Southern Paradise.
**[11:05] Hen**
However, it turned out to be
a trap laid by the Harusame.
**[11:12] Hen**
We and Kamui-dono barely managed to escape,
**[11:17] Hen**
but half our fleet was
reduced to space debris.
**[11:25] (Flashback) Abu**
Are they trying to hunt
every single rabbit down?
**[11:29] (Flashback) Abu**
We're an endangered species, you know.
**[11:32] (Flashback) Abu**
They could stand to be a little nicer to us.
**[11:36] (Flashback) Kam**
Nah, they know their stuff.
**[11:38] (Flashback) Kam**
Abuto, rabbits can die of loneliness.
**[11:42] (Flashback) Kam**
But the enemy has prepared
a fun playground for us.
**[11:45] (Flashback) Kam**
We need to show our gratitude.
**[11:49] (Flashback) G**
Wh-What the?
**[11:54] (Flashback) Kam**
Charge in!
**[11:59] (Flashback) Hen**
*Abuto-dono!*
**[12:00] (Flashback) Hen**
*Why would you charge into the flagship by
yourselves? Are you out of your minds?!*
**[12:03] (Flashback) Abu**
You're barking up the wrong tree!
**[12:06] (Flashback) Abu**
He said he felt like getting up close
and personal with the enemy general.
**[12:09] (Flashback) Abu**
Grab Takasugi and scram while
we're distracting the enemy.
**[12:14] (Flashback) Abu**
*If we live to meet again, give
this moron a piece of your mind.*
**[12:18] (Flashback) Hen**
What are you saying, Abuto-dono?
**[12:20] (Flashback) Abu**
*I've got a bad feeling about this.*
**[12:22] (Flashback) Abu**
The Harusame never fought like this before.
**[12:26] (Flashback) Abu**
Someone who's familiar with the Yato's
killing style has joined them.
**[12:35] (Flashback) Abu**
I knew it.
**[12:36] (Flashback) Abu**
Who the hell have they teamed up with?
**[12:40] (Flashback) Kam**
Just think about who could
pull this crap against Yato.
**[12:43] (Flashback) Kam**
Only two people in this entire universe...
**[12:51] (Flashback) Kam**
Stupid me, and my stupid father.
**[12:56] Shin**
Umibozu-san?
**[12:58] Shin**
Wh-Why?
**[12:59] Hen**
That's what we'd like to know, but...
**[13:02] Hen**
What we do know is that
he and the Harusame
**[13:04] Hen**
banished the Kiheitai and the
7th Division into the darkness of space.
**[13:10] Hen**
Kamui-dono has gone missing,
**[13:13] Hen**
and so has Shinsuke-dono.
**[13:32] (Flashback) Ban**
Takechi has readied an escape vessel.
**[13:35] (Flashback) Ban**
Run, Matako.
**[13:37] (Flashback) Ban**
I promise to bring Shinsuke with me.
**[13:41] (Flashback) Ban**
So...
**[13:42] (Flashback) Ban**
Live on.
**[13:45] (Flashback) Ban**
Don't let the Kiheitai end this way.
**[13:56] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama is still alive.
**[13:58] Mat**
The Kiheitai aren't finished yet.
**[14:01] Mat**
I bet they're waiting for our help right now.
**[14:05] Mat**
So... So...
**[14:08] Gin**
That so?
**[14:09] Gin**
Guess I should go finish him off for good.
**[14:12] Shin**
Gin-san!
**[14:13] Gin**
Sorry, Nobume-san, but that's
the most I can do for them.
**[14:17] Gin**
Or do you want me to avenge those morons?
**[14:22] Nob**
Unless the Harusame are taken out,
this country will never change.
**[14:25] Nob**
The Harusame Space Pirates
have links to the Tendoshu
**[14:28] Nob**
and have amassed great power.
**[14:31] Nob**
If Naraku is one of Utsuro's wings,
**[14:33] Nob**
then the Harusame is the other.
**[14:37] Nob**
Tear it off, and you'll bring the crows that
look down on mankind crashing down.
**[14:43] Nob**
And only you, Shoyo's pupils,
have the power to do that.
**[15:01] E**
It has been a while, Utsuro-dono.
**[15:04] E**
Thank you for traveling all the way
to the end of the universe to see us.
**[15:08] E**
Though we didn't exactly invite you.
**[15:11] U**
Rest assured.
**[15:12] U**
I may be one of the Tendoshu,
**[15:14] U**
but unlike those senior citizens, I don't
like sitting too long in one place.
**[15:20] E**
Ah, you're telling us senile geezers
to shut up and sit our butts down?
**[15:24] U**
Senile geezers wouldn't be able to
sink an entire fleet from their seats.
**[15:28] U**
Thanks to your efforts in keeping a
part of the rebels occupied in space,
**[15:33] U**
we managed to take on the enemies on Earth.
**[15:38] U**
We're truly grateful.
**[15:40] E**
All we did was deal with our enemies.
**[15:43] E**
We don't need your gratitude.
**[15:45] E**
Indeed. We should stick to the
agreement we've had until now
**[15:49] E**
and help each other only
when our interests align.
**[15:54] U**
"So don't get any closer"?
**[15:58] U**
Dear me. Everyone in the
universe hates the Tendoshu.
**[16:01] U**
Even the Elders of the cosmos' biggest
crime syndicate are wary of us?
**[16:07] U**
Do you think a youngster like me
could be plotting something?
**[16:10] E**
I wonder which of us is
really the youngster here.
**[16:13] E**
In your eyes, even we geezers must look
like nothing more than greenhorns,
**[16:20] E**
Utsuro-dono.
**[16:23] Nob**
You people need to know
**[16:26] Nob**
just what the Tendoshu
controlling this country are,
**[16:29] Nob**
and just who Utsuro is.
**[16:33] Nob**
They're all beings born from Altana.
**[16:37] Nob**
Altana being the new energy
resource the Amanto discovered.
**[16:41] Nob**
Some in this country call them ley lines.
**[16:45] Shin**
I've heard about that.
**[16:47] Shin**
I think Ane and Mone mentioned
**[16:49] Shin**
that the terminal the Amanto
built is powered by that.
**[16:54] Nob**
Right.
**[16:55] Nob**
The invention of a method to
convert Altana into usable energy
**[16:59] Nob**
led to rapid development across the universe.
**[17:03] Nob**
Interstellar travel became easy,
**[17:05] Nob**
as did the development of weapons
capable of destroying planets.
**[17:10] Nob**
And those in possession of Altana
gained massive influence.
**[17:17] Nob**
After many a war,
**[17:19] Nob**
states signed a non-aggression pact that
rendered Altana reserves off-limits
**[17:24] Nob**
and formed a centralized organization
to monitor Altana gates, or "holes."
**[17:29] Nob**
That is the Altana Preservation Agency,
**[17:33] Nob**
later known as the Tendoshu.
**[17:35] Gin**
So, basically, the people who were
meant to monitor the resource
**[17:38] Gin**
used its power for their own benefit?
**[17:40] Kat**
The holes in each planet were closed
off, and only they had access to it.
**[17:45] Kat**
That's how they took control of
countless planets and consumed them...
**[17:49] Kat**
Like parasites.
**[17:51] Nob**
Part of the reason they're
obsessed with Earth
**[17:54] Nob**
is its massive Altana reserves,
which were previously untouched.
**[17:58] Nob**
But what they're probably most interested
in is a certain phenomenon...
**[18:04] Nob**
An unexplained effect, which had been
documented as a miracle in the past,
**[18:08] Nob**
that somehow influences
the very principles of life.
**[18:13] Nob**
On this planet, it happened
to take the form of a man.
**[18:17] Nob**
Utsuro,
**[18:19] Nob**
the founder's name passed down through
generations of Tenshoin Naraku.
**[18:23] Nob**
Each head of the Naraku is said
to have inherited that name and
**[18:26] Nob**
worked behind the scenes for
the authority of their time.
**[18:29] Nob**
But that wasn't the truth.
**[18:31] Nob**
It came to light during the Tokugawa's reign,
when Naraku served the Tendoshu.
**[18:38] Nob**
The Utsuro at the time
mysteriously went missing.
**[18:41] Nob**
Since Naraku made traitors pay
for their sins with death,
**[18:44] Nob**
they looked all over for him.
**[18:53] Nob**
Utsuro had changed his name,
concealed his background,
**[18:57] Nob**
and was teaching kids.
**[19:00] Nob**
It's said that the look in his eyes
made him seem like a different person.
**[19:04] Nob**
Later on, his students
caused a major uprising,
**[19:08] Nob**
but they were defeated,
**[19:11] Nob**
and Utsuro was executed.
**[19:17] Nob**
That's when something unexpected happened.
**[19:42] Nob**
That's the truth behind Utsuro.
**[19:49] Nob**
Over its 500-year history, the
Tenshoin Naraku had thirteen heads.
**[19:55] Nob**
But they were all the same man...
**[20:00] Nob**
A man who became incapable of
dying due to the power of Altana.
**[20:05] Nob**
"Yoshida Shoyo" was but a fleeting
smile that Utsuro let slip.
**[20:12] U**
Surely you jest.
**[20:14] U**
The Tendoshu, a bunch of immortals?
**[20:17] U**
Where did you hear a
baseless rumor like that?
**[20:19] E**
Where, indeed?
**[20:21] E**
But I hear you used to be an
agency that researched Altana.
**[20:26] E**
It would make sense if that research led you
**[20:30] E**
to the entire universe's
greatest wish, immortality.
**[20:33] E**
That's how looking at your
unfathomable smile makes us feel.
**[20:39] U**
The entire universe's
greatest wish? Is it really?
**[20:44] U**
Can an endless life really be called "life"?
**[20:47] U**
If living can be defined as not being dead,
**[20:50] U**
can life really exist in the absence
of the very concept of death?
**[20:55] U**
I would call that a void.
**[20:57] U**
A hollow, "Utsuro," if you will,
devoid of life and death.
**[21:01] U**
When people suffer for long,
they seek an end to it all.
**[21:06] U**
But even in times of happiness,
when they find out that it's everlasting,
**[21:11] U**
they seek an end to it all.
**[21:13] U**
And I have met my end and taken
birth over and over again.
**[21:17] U**
But no matter how many times I started
over, I was still "Utsuro," a void.
**[21:21] U**
That's why the me of now was born...
**[21:24] U**
To kill all of myself and
put an end to all of Utsuro.
**[21:31] E**
The 12th Division of the Harusame?!
**[21:34] E**
I see.
**[21:35] E**
You've already...
**[21:37] U**
Respected Elders,
**[21:39] U**
I'm here today to sign a
new agreement with you.
**[21:43] U**
Under its terms, you will first transfer
all control over the Harusame to me.
**[21:46] U**
And second...
**[21:48] U**
You snot-nosed brats will shut up
and keep your butts seated.
**[21:55] Nob**
There's no telling how long
Utsuro has been living for,
**[22:00] Nob**
or whether Shoyo is still
a part of him or not.
**[22:05] Nob**
But one thing is for sure:
**[22:08] Nob**
he's currently the most dangerous
being in the universe.
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part One
***SIGN*** The Monster and the Monster's Child
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part Two
**[23:49] Gin**
We're coming back here, no matter what...
***SIGN*** Next Episode
Leave Letter
**[23:51] Gin**
The three of us, and one critter.
***SIGN*** A leave letter even though we just started?!
***SIGN*** There's a reason deeper than the universe for this...
***SIGN*** Somehow or the other, the Battle on Rakuyo Arc has begun!
***SIGN*** What's "Rakuyo"?? Find out next time!
# 318 - Leave Letter
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Nob**
There's no telling how long
Utsuro has been living for,
**[00:09] Nob**
or whether Shoyo is still
a part of him or not.
**[00:15] Nob**
But one thing is for sure:
**[00:17] Nob**
he's currently the most dangerous
being in the universe.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Watch the Battle on Rakuyo arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:59] Kat**
If Takasugi were alive, what would he say?
**[02:04] Kat**
We became Joi Rebels after the bakufu
took our teacher and friends from us,
**[02:09] Kat**
hoping to change this cruel
world for the better.
**[02:13] Kat**
If he were to find out that our teacher
was the one who created this world...
**[02:19] Kat**
I'd be lying if I said the whole
thing didn't come as a shock.
**[02:24] Kat**
But it's also true that a part
of me thinks it makes sense.
**[02:27] Kat**
Yoshida Shoyo was a bright
light that shone upon us.
**[02:32] Kat**
But, looking back,
**[02:34] Kat**
the vacant look he would
sometimes have in his eyes
**[02:37] Kat**
might have been him staring at
the giant shadow of his past.
**[02:43] Kat**
I may never know why he
spent years in the Naraku,
**[02:46] Kat**
then left it and started the Shoka Sonjuku.
**[02:52] Kat**
But I do know...
**[02:54] Kat**
that the man smiling there back then
was, without a doubt, our teacher.
**[03:02] Kat**
And I do know what I ought to do
now as Yoshida Shoyo's student.
**[03:09] Gin**
Zura, that's not Shoyo.
**[03:13] (Flashback) Sho**
A monster's sword cannot
cut another monster.
**[03:17] (Flashback) Sho**
You have to grow stronger than me
using the sword of a human.
**[03:22] Sho**
It's something else, something
not even Shoyo could defeat.
**[03:28] Sho**
Shoyo died back then...
**[03:31] Sho**
That's what Takasugi would say.
**[03:34] Kat**
I see.
**[03:35] Kat**
Even so, Gintoki,
**[03:37] Kat**
it's my turn now.
**[03:41] Kat**
I can't make you kill our teacher again.
**[03:50] U**
The Elders passed away in
an unfortunate incident.
**[03:54] U**
There's nothing shackling
the 12 Divisions anymore.
**[03:58] U**
You're free to do as you wish now.
**[04:00] Shirei?**
Utsuro-sama,
**[04:01] Shirei?**
we do not seek freedom after all this time.
**[04:04] Shirei?**
What the Harusame desires is governance...
**[04:07] Shirei?**
A leader to show us the way.
**[04:09] Shirei?**
Please let us join the Tendoshu's
forces, Your Excellency—
**[04:13] UB**
Good grief.
**[04:14] UB**
Pirates, of all people,
seeking governance? A leader?
**[04:19] UB**
You make me want to give you a drink
made from Luffy's straw hat.
**[04:23] UB**
You really call yourselves pirates?
**[04:27] G**
U-Umibozu!
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[04:38] (Flashback) Gin**
Get on with it!
**[04:40] (Flashback) Gin**
Jeez, why do women take so long to get ready?
**[04:44] (Flashback) Shin**
There, there.
**[04:45] (Flashback) Shin**
Girls need to take care of a lot of
things boys will never understand.
**[04:48] (Flashback) Kag**
Sorry to keep you waiting.
**[04:50] (Flashback) Kag**
I just couldn't settle on the right outfit.
**[04:52] (Flashback) Gin**
Like hell you couldn't!
**[04:53] (Flashback) Gin**
What you settled on was an early lunch!
**[04:55] (Flashback) Gin**
Hey, what part of this thing is a girl?!
**[05:05] Oto**
What's the matter, Sadaharu?
**[05:06] Tama**
Did Gintoki-sama and the rest come back?
**[05:09] Cat**
He probably just needs to pee.
**[05:11] Cat**
Even if those wanted felons did
come back, it'd only be a bother.
**[05:15] Cat**
Here, get going.
**[05:35] UB**
No vindication for the Elders, it seems.
**[05:38] UB**
Do you think you can drink some sweet
stuff if you follow the Tendoshu?
**[05:43] U**
You were asked by an old friend in the
Elders to dispose of the 7th Division, yes?
**[05:49] U**
I shall pay you in their stead.
**[05:52] UB**
I didn't put in enough work to get paid.
**[05:55] UB**
Those guys were already on their last legs.
**[05:58] UB**
You ordered that, didn't you?
**[06:01] U**
You may be the number one
hunter in the universe,
**[06:03] U**
but I figured it wouldn't be easy
for you to hunt down your own son.
**[06:10] UB**
Until now, I'd never gotten involved in
the internal disputes of crime syndicates.
**[06:15] UB**
It may have been out of obligation,
**[06:16] UB**
but do you know the real reason
why I helped pirates out?
**[06:20] UB**
It was to kill that rotten son
of mine before you lot did.
**[06:24] UB**
It was my own balls that
gave life to that monster.
**[06:27] UB**
Then it's my duty, balls and all,
to put an end to him.
**[06:33] UB**
So let me make this crystal clear.
**[06:39] Kag**
Take me with you.
**[06:41] UB**
I won't let anyone else...
**[06:43] Kag**
...kill him.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[06:48] Gin**
That idiot.
***SIGN*** Leave Letter
**[06:50] Gin**
She didn't have to write this crap.
Odd Jobs is already long since...
**[06:54] Shin**
"Odd Jobs isn't done yet."
**[06:57] Shin**
"I'll definitely come back."
**[06:59] Shin**
That's probably what she means.
**[07:03] Shin**
Gin-san...
**[07:04] Gin**
Don't say anything.
**[07:05] Gin**
I don't understand anymore, either.
**[07:09] Gin**
Not what I ought to do as his student,
**[07:12] Gin**
or what I ought to do as a fellow student.
**[07:16] Gin**
There's only one thing I do understand:
***SIGN*** Leave Letter
***SIGN*** Leave Letter
***SIGN*** Leave Letter
**[07:20] Gin**
what we ought to do as Odd Jobs.
**[07:24] Gin**
This is a special vacation.
**[07:25] Gin**
You guys can go on a space
trip or wherever you want.
**[07:29] Gin**
But we're coming back here, no matter what...
**[07:33] Gin**
The three of us, and one critter.
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part Two
***SIGN*** Leave Letter
**[07:42] U**
Are you saying your son is still alive?
**[07:45] UB**
Playing the fool, eh?
**[07:47] UB**
Surely you know already.
**[07:56] UB**
He's not the type to die from just that.
**[07:59] UB**
My hunt is still in the phase
where the prey has taken the bait.
**[08:04] UB**
But if you're going to stick your
nose where it doesn't belong again,
**[08:08] UB**
then you'd best be prepared to
be hunted down by Umibozu, too.
**[08:14] UB**
Of course,
**[08:15] UB**
the guy over there seems to
be prepared for it already.
**[08:19] U**
Stand down, Oboro.
**[08:22] U**
He may not be our ally,
but he's not an enemy, either.
**[08:26] U**
He's nothing but a hunter who pulls
back on his bow with no hesitation,
**[08:29] U**
even with his son in front of him.
**[08:33] Mat**
What are you playing at, Takechi-senpai?!
**[08:35] Mat**
We decided not to work with
them, even as a last resort!
**[08:40] Kag**
Seconds.
**[08:41] Hen**
Now, now, don't be in such a rush.
Nobody's going to take your food away.
**[08:45] Hen**
Chew properly, and eat
the boiled veggies, too.
**[08:48] Mat**
Are you kidding me?!
**[08:49] Mat**
What are you domesticating
her for, you moai mom?!
**[08:51] Mat**
Why would you let her,
of all people, on board?!
**[08:53] Mat**
Give your lolicon tendencies a rest!
**[08:55] Hen**
I'm not a lolicon. I'm a feminist.
**[08:58] Hen**
I'm not putting my hands
on an innocent little girl.
**[09:02] Hen**
I'm extending a helping hand to her.
**[09:04] Mat**
Uh, no matter how you put it,
it just makes you sound like a lolicon!
**[09:06] Mat**
You're a creep, Senpai!
**[09:07] Mat**
What part of her is "innocent"?
**[09:09] Mat**
Knock it off already!
**[09:10] Mat**
How can you eat that much
off the enemy's table?
**[09:12] Mat**
Sure you didn't sneak in to
burn through our provisions?
**[09:15] Kag**
You guys would crash and burn even if
I did nothing. You're meaningless to me.
**[09:19] Kag**
If you wanna make a comeback,
**[09:21] Kag**
bet everything you have on my tummy.
**[09:23] Kag**
I'll destroy it all...
**[09:25] Kag**
The Harusame, my stupid dad,
and my stupid brother.
**[09:31] Hen**
You shouldn't say things you don't mean.
**[09:34] Hen**
You want to stop those two, don't you?
**[09:37] Hen**
That's why you came here all by yourself...
**[09:40] Hen**
To protect them as a daughter,
as a sister, and as family.
**[09:51] U**
It seems you're approaching your limit.
**[09:54] U**
Even if it does gain the
blood of an immortal,
**[09:57] U**
a human body cannot handle
that burden forever.
**[10:01] U**
All the times you've died so far have
clearly taken a toll on your body.
**[10:06] O**
Even so, what has kept me alive
when I should've died long ago
**[10:10] O**
is your blood flowing through my body.
**[10:13] O**
And the vow I made to you, one I
will keep until my body rots away.
**[10:19] U**
Even if you made that promise
to a different avatar of mine?
**[10:24] O**
Utsuro-sama, the enemy is not dead yet.
**[10:28] O**
During the operation to
mop up the 7th Division,
**[10:30] O**
we detected an unknown unit
moving around in the chaos.
**[10:35] O**
One of them was an experienced Yato fighter.
**[10:37] O**
We've received reports that the unit they
led was likely comprised of Earthlings.
**[10:42] U**
You're saying a third party got involved
and secretly rescued Takasugi and gang?
**[10:47] O**
They had a guide.
**[10:50] O**
Probably exactly who you think it is.
**[11:06] Ban**
*Is this...*
**[11:13] Ban**
*Where's Shinsuke?*
**[11:14] Ban**
*Where are the Kiheitai?*
**[11:16] Ban**
*Just what is this place?*
**[11:20] Sak**
Hey, you awake?
**[11:22] Ban**
Y-You people...
**[11:24] Sak**
Sorry.
**[11:25] Sak**
We couldn't save any more of you.
**[11:28] Sak**
But don't you worry.
**[11:30] Sak**
Your general, and our friend...
**[11:33] Sak**
We'll definitely save him!
**[11:37] Kat**
"Friend," huh?
**[11:39] Kat**
At this point, you're the
only one who calls him that.
**[11:43] Kat**
He should be thankful that
**[11:45] Kat**
there's a man who is willing to go to
the ends of the universe to save him.
**[11:50] Kat**
And he should lament that
**[11:52] Kat**
there's a man who is willing to go to
the ends of the universe to kill him.
**[11:55] Sak**
What, Zura?
**[11:57] Sak**
You're still havin' a fight with
Takasugi over somethin' stupid?
**[12:00] Kat**
I'm not Zura. I'm Katsura.
**[12:02] Kat**
A money-minded businessman
wouldn't understand.
**[12:03] Kat**
Samurai risk their lives to
fight for their stupid bushido.
**[12:07] Sak**
That so?
**[12:09] Sak**
In that case, I wonder what stupid thing
that happy-go-lucky fool's fightin' for.
**[12:17] Hen**
Do you realize why I let you board this ship?
**[12:21] Hen**
It's because I can bend your friends
to my will if I take you hostage.
**[12:26] Mat**
Takechi-senpai?
**[12:28] Hen**
I'm the Kiheitai's strategic advisor.
**[12:30] Hen**
My job is to get us out of this predicament
using any and all methods available.
**[12:35] Kag**
Don't worry.
**[12:37] Kag**
Whether I do something stupid or not,
**[12:41] Kag**
those guys will come
**[12:43] Kag**
to protect my family.
**[12:46] Kag**
That's why I must go...
**[12:50] Kag**
To protect my other family.
**[12:55] Ban**
*The Dragon of Katsurahama, Sakamoto Tatsuma.*
**[12:58] Ban**
*The Rampaging Noble, Katsura Kotaro.*
**[13:01] Ban**
*The White Yaksha, Sakata Gintoki.*
**[13:04] Ban**
* The men of legend who fought*
* with Shinsuke in the Joi War...*
**[13:08] Ban**
*Why are they here?*
**[13:11] Gin**
Thanks for bringing us here.
**[13:13] Nob**
You should hurry up and get going.
**[13:15] Nob**
Nobunobu has caught wind of our movements.
**[13:18] Nob**
I'll take care of things here.
**[13:21] Nob**
Figure the rest out on your own.
**[13:23] Shin**
Nobume-san...
**[13:25] Nob**
Can I ask you one thing?
**[13:27] Nob**
Are you here as a student of Shoyo's,
**[13:31] Nob**
or as a friend of Takasugi's?
**[13:34] Gin**
Odd Jobs does whatever's asked of us.
**[13:38] Gin**
Can I ask you something?
**[13:39] Gin**
Did you help us out as a student of Shoyo's,
**[13:44] Gin**
or as a friend of Takasugi's?
**[13:47] Nob**
Because your foolish face
**[13:51] Nob**
looked just like his.
**[13:56] Nob**
So stupid.
**[13:57] Gin**
Yeah, both you and me.
**[14:02] Kat**
Gintoki...
**[14:04] Sak**
Everyone's here now.
**[14:06] Sak**
Set sail!
**[14:16] U**
The Kaientai?
**[14:18] O**
Sakamoto Tatsuma.
**[14:20] O**
He fought in the Joi War with
Takasugi and the others.
**[14:23] O**
We've received word that a combined fleet
with his and Katsura's people has left Earth.
**[14:30] O**
They were probably the ones who
rescued the remnants of the Kiheitai.
**[14:34] U**
I see.
**[14:35] U**
Former comrades have come together
again to save their friend, huh?
**[14:40] U**
Will you indeed be the ones to
fight me until the very end?
**[14:45] Ban**
What are you all playing at?
**[14:48] Ban**
You cut ties with Shinsuke a long time ago.
**[14:52] Ban**
So why are you doing this now?
**[14:55] Ban**
Only Gintoki and Zura got
into a fight with Takasugi.
**[14:58] Ban**
That's how they've always been.
**[15:00] Ban**
They keep quarrelin' over methods,
even though their goal is the same.
**[15:04] Kat**
You were wandering across the universe,
so you don't know what he did.
**[15:09] Kat**
Tell him about all his evil acts, Gintoki.
**[15:12] Gin**
One bad thing about Takasugi...
**[15:15] Gin**
Two bad things about Takasugi...
**[15:17] Gin**
Three—
**[15:18] Kat**
Look, there were so many that he fell asleep!
**[15:21] Kat**
You helped out a man who's basically
an incarnation of all things evil.
**[15:24] Kat**
Why don't I count and see if he has
enough good points to be worth saving?
**[15:28] Kat**
One good thing about Takasugi...
**[15:29] Shin**
There are tons of good
things about him, too?!
**[15:32] Shin**
You two just want to sleep, don't you?!
**[15:33] Sak**
Once the battle begins,
there will be no time to sleep.
**[15:36] Sak**
Preserving one's energy
is also part of bushido.
**[15:39] Shin**
I don't wanna hear that from you!
You're losing energy just by being on a ship!
**[15:43] Mut**
There was a leak from the Harusame side
**[15:46] Mut**
that said they were planning an operation
to mop up the 7th Division and Kiheitai.
**[15:51] Mut**
All we did was act on that information
as per Sakamoto's orders.
**[15:56] Ban**
Who leaked that information?
**[15:58] Mut**
There's no need for you to know.
**[16:00] Mut**
But Takasugi's not dead yet.
**[16:02] Mut**
That much is for sure.
**[16:03] Sak**
You guys have turned an
absolute monster against you.
**[16:08] Sak**
If we all don't work together, we'll all die.
**[16:10] Sak**
We're willin' to help you out.
**[16:13] Sak**
So you help us out, too.
**[16:15] Ban**
As if we could do that—
**[16:17] Sak**
You can.
**[16:18] Sak**
I don't know why Takasugi
and these guys had a fight.
**[16:22] Sak**
There must've been some extraordinary
circumstances involved.
**[16:25] Sak**
But things are the same as
back then, if you ask me.
**[16:29] Sak**
They're just partners in crime who fight
the moment they run into each other.
**[16:35] Sak**
It's always been my job to
put an end to their fights.
**[16:40] Sak**
And I don't mind if it's only for a moment...
**[16:42] Sak**
I'm gonna turn him back
to nothin' but a punk!
**[16:47] Shin**
Sakamoto-san...
**[16:48] G**
Captain!
**[16:51] Shin**
Th-That's...
**[16:53] Nb**
I'm sorry, gentlemen, but
your fun space trip ends now.
**[16:58] Nb**
You will be reduced to space debris here.
**[17:02] Ban**
Tokugawa Nobunobu!
**[17:04] Ban**
The shogun himself? Impossible!
**[17:07] Gin**
Jeez...
**[17:09] Gin**
He's here, huh?
**[17:11] Nb**
Sakata Gintoki, you cast a
stone at my new government.
**[17:16] Nb**
Did you think I,
**[17:18] Nb**
or heaven, would forgive you?
**[17:20] Nb**
You'll never escape, no matter
where in this universe you run—
**[17:25] Nb**
What's going on?
**[17:26] G**
A-Artillery fire!
**[17:27] Nb**
Artillery? They haven't lifted a finger.
**[17:30] G**
Not from the front!
**[17:31] G**
From the rear!
**[17:33] G**
That's not artillery!
**[17:35] G**
It's a raid ship fitted
with optical camouflage!
**[17:38] G**
The fleet in front is a decoy!
**[17:40] Nb**
What?
**[17:41] G**
Run away, shogun!
**[17:43] G**
The enemy is already—
**[17:46] Sak**
Oh? Is this what your new
government is made of?
**[17:49] Sak**
The old one we went to war
against had a bit more backbone.
**[17:54] Sak**
But we can take your country
down in thirteen seconds.
**[17:59] G**
You fiends!
**[18:00] Nb**
Don't move!
**[18:01] Nb**
If you do, my entire armada
will fire at your fleet!
**[18:05] Gin**
Just try it.
**[18:07] Gin**
Will you destroy our fleet first,
**[18:10] Gin**
or will we take the shogun's head first?
**[18:14] G**
P-Protect the shogun!
**[18:32] Ban**
* They turned that hopeless*
* situation around in a flash?*
**[18:36] Ban**
*These are the men that fought with Shinsuke.*
**[18:40] Sak**
*All ships, cease fire!*
**[18:44] Sak**
*This fight is over, guys.*
**[18:47] Sak**
*We've kissed and made up.*
**[18:49] Gin**
* We found out there were a*
* bunch of misunderstandings.*
**[18:52] Gin**
* Like how we laughed at his*
* sperm-like eyebrows or something.*
**[18:56] Kat**
*But we cleared that up.*
**[18:58] Kat**
* We didn't laugh at his eyebrows,*
* but his cropped hair.*
**[19:01] Kat**
* Isn't it funny that a man as*
* old as him has that hairstyle?*
**[19:05] Kat**
* In that case, your long*
* hair is funny, too, Zura.*
**[19:08] Kat**
*It's not long hair. It's Katsura.*
**[19:09] Gin**
* Anyway, we resolved the whole thing by*
* saying Zura would crop his hair, too.*
**[19:14] Kat**
*Why must I get such a messed-up hairstyle?!*
**[19:16] Gin**
* Also, as a sign of reconciliation, the*
* shogun invited us to a "Hawk-Crop Party."*
**[19:22] Gin**
* It's a meetup where we go around cropping*
* the heads of every hawk in the universe.*
**[19:25] Gin**
*As such, the operation is canceled.*
**[19:26] Gin**
* He wants you retainers to*
* return to Earth before him.*
**[19:31] Nb**
No need for that.
**[19:33] Nb**
You won't be able to escape.
**[19:35] Nb**
Not you or the retainers.
**[19:37] Nb**
If you can't slaughter the traitors, then you
retainers should disembowel yourselves.
**[19:42] Nb**
Kill the enemy or kill yourself.
Make your choice.
**[19:45] Nb**
What's wrong? Stand up already.
**[19:47] Nb**
Are you aware of who I am?!
**[19:50] Nb**
I'm Shogun Tokugawa Nobunob—
**[19:57] Ban**
There's no need for retainers to protect
the shogun or give their lives for him.
**[20:02] Ban**
*Leave.*
**[20:03] Ban**
* This country no longer*
* has a deserving leader.*
**[20:08] Gin**
Oh, man.
**[20:10] Gin**
The shogun's lost his teeth again.
**[20:12] Gin**
How does it feel,
**[20:13] Gin**
now that your long-standing wish of taking
down the bakufu has come true here?
**[20:18] Ban**
Nothing's come true.
**[20:20] Ban**
The Shinsengumi, Mimawarigumi, and the
retainers have all abandoned this castle.
**[20:25] Ban**
Felling it just makes me feel empty inside.
**[20:29] Ban**
How ironic.
**[20:30] Ban**
This man was left all alone because
he stood at the summit of the country.
**[20:35] Ban**
And that man had his wings ripped
off and fell to the ground,
**[20:38] Ban**
but there were those that joined him there.
**[20:41] Ban**
Shinsuke had you guys.
**[20:45] Ban**
There is something I must tell you.
**[20:48] Ban**
We have a secret base where we promised to
meet in case of unforeseen circumstances.
**[20:55] Ban**
*Forgive me, Shinsuke.*
**[20:56] Ban**
*You might yell at me for this,*
**[20:59] Ban**
*but we need these men to fight the Harusame.*
**[21:04] Ban**
*No...*
**[21:05] Ban**
* Before all that, I've ended up*
* wanting to see with my own eyes*
**[21:09] Ban**
* how you looked back when*
* you lived with these guys.*
**[21:14] Ban**
*Shinsuke...*
**[21:17] Ab**
What a graceful sleeping face.
**[21:19] Ab**
No matter how many people get burned by
the flames of war outside his eyelids,
**[21:23] Ab**
he coolly spends his time in his dreamland.
**[21:25] Ab**
I see generals everywhere are messed up.
**[21:30] Ab**
I swear...
**[21:31] Ab**
At a time when the 7th Division is
on the verge of destruction,
**[21:34] Ab**
just where is our general dreaming?
**[21:37] Ab**
I didn't expect him to pick this
as the gathering spot, though.
**[21:42] Ab**
The abandoned planet, Rakuyo.
**[21:44] Ab**
The ruins of a world ravaged by a great war.
**[21:48] Ab**
Rogues driven away from various
planets gather here,
**[21:52] Ab**
so it's the perfect place to hide.
**[21:55] Ab**
But I thought he'd never want
to come back here again.
**[22:02] Ab**
So even people like you
**[22:04] Ab**
can get homesick, huh,
**[22:07] Ab**
you family of monsters?
***SIGN*** To Be
Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:44] Ban**
Shinsuke, are these the samurai
we were trying to wipe out?
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part Three
**[23:49] Sak**
The next time we meet,
***SIGN*** The Song of Samurai
**[23:52] Sak**
it'll be as the four of us.
**[23:53] SignR**
At last, the Odd Jobs take to space!
**[23:53] SignL**
"Rakuyo" was Kagura's birthplace.
**[23:59] SignR**
Will the split-up family and former friends
**[23:59] SignL**
reunite on the abandoned planet?
# 319 - The Song of Samurai
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:06] Sak**
The space food that our old
lady chef prepares is famous
**[00:10] Sak**
for lettin' one experience home-cooked
flavor anywhere in the universe.
**[00:13] Sak**
Did you not like it, Shogun?
**[00:18] Sak**
This is a problem.
**[00:19] Sak**
If you don't eat, we'll be the criminals
who starved the shogun to death.
**[00:25] Nb**
You guys are already criminals
who will go down in history.
**[00:30] Nb**
I don't know or care how you plan to use me,
**[00:33] Nb**
but, struggle as you might,
you're fated to die anyway.
**[00:36] Nb**
You will never escape the Tendoshu!
**[00:40] Sak**
If I may be so presumptuous, Shogun...
**[00:43] Sak**
In our eyes, and probably
the Tendoshu's as well,
**[00:46] Sak**
you are no longer worth using.
**[00:51] Sak**
Your retainers walked out on you,
your government has rapidly lost power,
**[00:55] Sak**
and now you've committed a huge
blunder over a personal grudge.
**[00:59] Sak**
You've been too sullied for
them to use as a puppet.
**[01:03] Sak**
At this rate, it's clear that they'll
get rid of you along with us criminals.
**[01:10] Sak**
We are in the same boat here, standin' at
the edge of the same precipitous cliff.
**[01:14] Sak**
And I'm sayin' that's exactly
why you need to eat properly.
**[01:18] Sak**
You can't fight on an empty stomach,
**[01:20] Sak**
and for us as well as you,
the real battle is comin' up.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part Three
***SIGN*** The Song of Samurai
***SIGN*** Please watch this program in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!!!!!
**[03:03] Ban**
We can see it now.
**[03:05] Ban**
If Shinsuke and the rest are
alive, that's where they'll be.
**[03:09] Ban**
And that's probably where
**[03:10] Ban**
your friend who went with Takechi
and Matako will be, too.
**[03:16] Gin**
Rakuyo...
**[03:18] Gin**
So that's Kagura's home planet.
**[03:26] (Flashback) Kag**
*Sorry, Mommy.*
**[03:29] (Flashback) Kag**
*I've decided to leave this planet.*
**[03:32] (Flashback) Kag**
*But I promise to come back.*
**[03:37] (Flashback) Kag**
*This time with my stupid
brother and stupid father.*
**[03:41] (Flashback) Kag**
*I'll come back strong enough
to regain everything.*
**[03:48] Mat**
A grave?
**[03:49] Mat**
Someone you know?
**[03:51] Kag**
I just wanted to check something.
**[03:55] Kag**
It's just as I thought.
**[03:57] Kag**
That baldy is here, too.
**[04:01] UB**
How my homeland has changed
while I was away.
**[04:06] UB**
This has always been a hole for people
who're too stupid to live on other planets,
**[04:13] UB**
but I'd never run into people stupid enough
to pick a fight with me until now.
**[04:16] Abu**
Unfortunately, this is a squad formed by
a colossal moron who grew up right here.
**[04:22] Abu**
You guys had better give it a rest.
**[04:24] Abu**
I'm not getting involved, okay?
**[04:27] Abu**
This man's son took my left arm,
**[04:31] Abu**
and his daughter took one of my ears.
**[04:34] Abu**
There's no telling what he'll take.
**[04:38] Abu**
Or, what, do you want to avenge that idiot?
**[04:42] Abu**
You really shouldn't, then.
**[04:44] Abu**
He'll kill you for trying to steal his prey.
**[04:48] UB**
Are you saying he's still alive?
**[04:50] Abu**
Isn't that why you're here?
**[04:53] Abu**
To continue your father-son spat?
**[04:56] Abu**
You two are really similar.
**[04:59] Abu**
Once you zero in on a target, you ignore
everyone else until you defeat them.
**[05:05] Abu**
Even if that target is
your own father or son.
**[05:09] Abu**
Come. I don't have any tea to offer you,
**[05:12] Abu**
but I do have plenty of
complaints about your son.
**[05:15] G**
Vice Commander!
**[05:16] Abu**
Didn't you hear me?
**[05:18] Abu**
This man isn't the least bit
interested in taking our lives.
**[05:22] Abu**
If he were, we wouldn't be here right now.
**[05:25] Abu**
And we have no way to stop
this fool, or his fool son.
**[05:30] Abu**
In that case, all we can do is wait with him...
**[05:33] Abu**
For the other fool to come back.
**[05:38] Ban**
It seems the Harusame haven't
caught wind of this location yet.
**[05:43] Ban**
We didn't have to be so careful
and bring only our best men.
**[05:47] Shin**
Uh, everyone on the streets looks
like a space pirate to me.
**[05:52] Shin**
Did Kagura-chan really live
on such a scary planet?
**[05:55] Gin**
As a hangout for rogues from
all over the universe,
**[05:58] Gin**
it's not all that different
from the Kabuki District.
**[06:01] Gin**
Look, even the cabaret girls
here look like your sister.
**[06:04] Shin**
That's just a gorilla!
**[06:05] Gin**
And her customer's basically Kondo, too.
**[06:08] Shin**
That's just a gorilla!
**[06:09] Gin**
And the manga artist drawing all that, too.
**[06:11] Shin**
That's just a gorilla!
**[06:13] Sak**
Shinpachi-kun, Gintoki's sayin'
there's no need to be afraid.
**[06:17] Sak**
So what if they're gorillas?
**[06:18] Sak**
If they can work in such a
business despite being gorillas,
**[06:21] Sak**
then maybe their technique
is out of this world!
**[06:24] Shin**
Technique?
**[06:25] Sak**
Okay, let's split up from here.
**[06:27] Sak**
I'll try the G Course.
***SIGN*** G Course
***SIGN*** Gorilla
**[06:29] Shin**
He went down the Gorilla Course!
**[06:31] Mut**
I see. So you want the Gehenna Course.
***SIGN*** Gehenna
***SIGN*** G Course
**[06:35] Ban**
So these are the men who
fought with Shinsuke.
**[06:38] Shin**
This is not the time or
place for that reaction!
**[06:39] Kat**
Yes, it might actually be similar.
**[06:42] Kat**
Maybe Leader came to the Kabuki District
because it gave off the scent of home,
**[06:47] Kat**
right, Otae-san?
**[06:48] Shin**
I told you, that's not Sis!
**[06:50] Gin**
The scent of home, eh?
**[06:53] Gin**
All I smell here is mold and grime.
**[06:55] Mut**
We can't mix in the scent
of blood there, too.
**[06:59] Mut**
Anyhow, we should hurry to where
Takasugi and the rest are hidin'.
**[07:03] Mut**
Your friend is probably there, too.
**[07:05] Mut**
Unless we meet up with 'em and
protect 'em from the Harusame soon,
**[07:09] Mut**
we'll lose our means of
fightin' the Harusame, too.
**[07:13] Shin**
Bansai-san.
**[07:14] Ban**
Yes.
**[07:16] Ban**
To think I'd be leading you to
the emergency meeting place
**[07:20] Ban**
that only those in our upper
echelon know about...
**[07:26] Ban**
You can see it from here.
**[07:28] Ban**
It's that abandoned temple.
**[07:35] Shin**
Uh, Bansai-san, it just exploded.
**[07:39] Shin**
P-Please tell me that wasn't the place.
**[07:42] Ban**
Yes, maybe it was not.
**[07:44] Ban**
Right, it was the deserted house next door.
**[07:48] Ban**
Or not. The place next door to that.
**[07:51] Ban**
No, two doors down.
**[07:53] Ban**
No, three—
**[07:54] Shin**
They all exploded!
**[07:56] Shin**
Was he there? Was Takasugi-san
in one of those?!
**[07:59] Ban**
Yes.
**[08:00] Shin**
Oh, no!
**[08:00] Shin**
You mean the Harusame knew?
**[08:02] Gin**
Wasn't he the one who did all
that, and not the Harusame?
**[08:05] Gin**
Laser beams were coming out of his finger.
**[08:08] Shin**
No, nothing came out!
**[08:09] Shin**
Can you not? This guy doesn't get jokes!
**[08:12] Gin**
My bad. It wasn't his finger.
Something came from his brain.
**[08:14] Shin**
I told you, nothing came out!
**[08:16] G**
Bansai-sama, you're alive?
**[08:18] Ban**
You're part of the Kiheitai!
**[08:21] Ban**
What just happened?
What were those explosions?
**[08:24] G**
We're done for.
**[08:26] G**
It was Umibozu.
**[08:28] G**
He sniffed out this place.
**[08:31] Kag**
*Don't tell me...*
**[08:33] Kag**
*Don't tell me!*
**[08:34] G**
P-Please hurry!
**[08:35] Ban**
How's Shinsuke? Is he all right?
**[08:40] Ban**
Hey, answer me!
**[08:44] G**
We're sorry, Bansai—
**[08:54] Shin**
Gin-san! Bansai-san!
**[08:56] Gin**
A trap.
**[08:58] Gin**
Those guys were in bed with the enemy.
**[09:01] Gin**
I bet they were told to bring us here
if they wanted their lives spared.
**[09:05] Gin**
But they were just sacrificial
pawns, apparently.
**[09:09] Gin**
It looks like...
**[09:12] Gin**
this planet has long since
fallen into Harusame hands.
**[09:16] Abu**
How awful.
**[09:18] Abu**
That would turn even us Yato into cinders.
**[09:22] Abu**
If we were there, that is.
**[09:25] Abu**
If not for your advice,
we'd have been done for.
**[09:28] Abu**
Some gods abandon you,
and some save you, huh?
**[09:31] Abu**
Though, to begin with, the one who both
destroyed and saved our 7th Division
**[09:35] Abu**
wasn't godly, but a baldy instead.
**[09:38] UB**
I am the great Umibozu, the best
alien hunter in the universe.
**[09:43] UB**
I always get my prey,
**[09:45] UB**
but I never try to poach someone else's.
**[09:48] UB**
My prey is the rotten brat alone.
**[09:51] UB**
That man is not my prey nor the Harusame's,
**[09:56] UB**
but the prey of a moron who'll come
to settle the score someday.
**[10:00] Abu**
A moron, eh?
**[10:01] UB**
Long story short, I hate people who
meddle in other people's fights.
**[10:07] UB**
I gave them a warning, but it seems
they're serious about taking me on.
**[10:12] UB**
They came prepared to
destroy an entire planet.
**[10:16] UB**
If that's what they want,
**[10:18] UB**
then I have to be ready, too...
**[10:22] UB**
Ready for the most dangerous
creature I've seen
**[10:25] UB**
in my 25 years as an alien hunter,
**[10:28] UB**
and ready to hunt him down.
**[10:42] B**
I should've realized sooner.
**[10:45] B**
To think the enemy managed to turn
some of our surviving comrades...
**[10:50] B**
The Kiheitai started to crumble
the moment Shinsuke went down.
**[10:55] Gin**
This would've happened sooner or later.
**[10:58] Gin**
Besides, there'd be no point
in us being here if it didn't.
**[11:02] Gin**
Right, Zura?
**[11:04] Gin**
Tatsuma?
**[11:06] Gin**
Quit spacing out.
**[11:08] Gin**
In battle, the ones who burden
themselves with regret
**[11:13] Gin**
are always the first to die.
**[11:15] Gin**
The only burden samurai should carry
**[11:18] Gin**
is their sword.
**[11:21] Ban**
White Yaksha!
**[11:24] Kat**
Want me to tell you how to
avoid the enemy's bullets?
**[11:28] Kat**
It's simple!
**[11:30] Kat**
Run!
**[11:33] Kat**
Run faster than the enemy's bullets!
**[11:45] Kat**
Run...
**[11:46] Kat**
Run faster than the
**[11:50] Kat**
shadow of death looming over you!
**[11:55] G**
They're downstairs!
**[11:55] G**
Hurry!
**[12:00] Mut**
Fire!
***SIGN*** Charge!!
**[12:07] Ban**
*They used a mad rush as a feint?*
**[12:09] Ban**
*While they distracted the enemy,*
**[12:12] Ban**
* they sent their friends*
* to surround the enemy?*
***SIGN*** Die
**[12:15] Ban**
*Shinsuke...*
**[12:16] Ban**
* Are these the samurai we*
* were trying to wipe out?*
**[12:20] Ban**
*No wonder they gave us such a hard time.*
**[12:23] Ban**
*Sure, the era did break them,*
**[12:26] Ban**
* and they did degrade into something*
* resembling a blunt blade.*
**[12:30] Ban**
*However...*
**[12:31] Ban**
* The steel that remains here even after*
* breaking, crumbling, and taking hit after hit*
**[12:35] Ban**
* may be tempered to cut through*
* every metal in the universe*
**[12:42] Ban**
*as the last sword of the samurai.*
**[12:46] G**
Now here's a surprise.
**[12:48] G**
I can't believe they fended off
my 4th Division so easily.
**[12:51] G**
Just like that Takasugi,
**[12:54] G**
it seems Earthlings aren't
just a bunch of monkeys.
**[12:58] G**
You're the monkey.
**[13:00] G**
I didn't give you permission
to deploy your troops.
**[13:03] G**
This wouldn't have happened
if you'd followed my orders.
**[13:07] G**
Save your whining for your
wife, you mecha geezer.
**[13:11] G**
Wars aren't fought with your mind.
**[13:14] G**
They're meant to be fought with headbutts.
**[13:15] G**
My cranium is at least 50
times as hard as yours.
**[13:19] G**
Want to try it?
**[13:21] G**
You know too little about the enemy.
**[13:23] G**
They are...
**[13:24] G**
Samurai.
**[13:26] G**
Or should I say, the remnants of samurai?
**[13:30] G**
That reminds me, didn't you fight in some
Earth war back when you were a mercenary?
**[13:36] G**
You're the Harusame's 2nd Division commander
and said to be its finest swordsman.
**[13:40] G**
I bet you cut down a ton of
that island nation's warriors.
**[13:44] G**
No, there was one man I couldn't cut.
**[13:49] G**
But that's all in the past.
**[13:53] G**
Samurai use group tactics that
they call the art of war.
**[13:57] G**
We'll split them up and
destroy each group in turn.
**[14:01] G**
Samurai history will end here
today, by the Harusame's hands.
**[14:07] G**
What's with these guys?
**[14:08] G**
Weren't our enemies supposed
to be just Earthlings?
**[14:11] G**
Why are these monsters with them?
**[14:14] Mut**
Monsters? Rude.
**[14:16] Mut**
Sure, we have different blood flowin'
through our veins than Earthlings.
***SIGN*** But so what?
**[14:21] Mut**
We may not carry the same blood,
**[14:24] Mut**
but we vowed to shed it on the same
battlefield, for the same cause.
**[14:29] Mut**
We're samurai!
**[14:33] G**
*Don't fight them head-on!*
**[14:34] G**
* Samurai are highly experienced*
* in close-quarters combat!*
**[14:37] G**
Burn those monkeys down!
**[14:48] Ban**
What a boorish bunch.
**[14:50] Ban**
During a musical performance, you're
supposed to shut up and listen to the song.
**[14:54] Ban**
Do your wax-filled ears not hear it?
**[14:57] Ban**
This unrefined yet graceful,
**[15:00] Ban**
haphazard yet harmonious
**[15:07] Ban**
song of samurai?
**[15:09] Shin**
Gin-san! Bansai-san!
**[15:11] Gin**
Hey. Looks like you managed to
run away from the grim reaper.
**[15:15] Ban**
I didn't run from anything.
**[15:17] Ban**
If anything, I chased after
**[15:21] Ban**
the backs of you grim reapers.
**[15:22] Kat**
I'm not a grim reaper! I'm Katsura!
**[15:24] Sak**
Cease your name callin'!
**[15:26] Sak**
How are we—
**[15:31] Ban**
It is as you see.
**[15:32] Ban**
Anyone who's with you can
never have enough lives.
**[15:36] Gin**
Not exactly.
**[15:38] Gin**
As you see, we also have some helping hands.
**[15:41] Gin**
I think I understand how Takasugi
stayed alive all this time.
**[15:48] Gin**
Were you the one defending
that grim reaper's back?
**[15:51] Ban**
Who knows?
**[15:54] Ban**
All I know is that watching
the backs of idiots like you
**[15:58] Ban**
is never boring.
**[16:01] Sak**
Gintoki! Zura!
**[16:03] Sak**
We Kaientai will deal with the flies above!
**[16:06] Sak**
You guys look for Takasugi below!
**[16:10] Kat**
Sakamoto!
**[16:11] Kat**
The enemy's trying to take
us out one at a time!
**[16:15] Kat**
If we split up when we're already
outnumbered, we'll never win!
**[16:16] G**
The insides, Katsura-san!
The insides fell out!
**[16:18] Sak**
Even if we gather in one place,
we'll still be outnumbered.
**[16:22] Sak**
In that case, we should
each do whatever we can.
**[16:27] Sak**
Besides, I believe...
**[16:30] Sak**
Not in the strength of thousands of enemies,
**[16:31] Sak**
but of those I've fought
with thousands of times...
**[16:34] Sak**
In the strength of you two.
**[16:40] Sak**
The next time we meet,
**[16:42] Sak**
it'll be as the four of us.
**[16:46] Obo**
So the one who leaked the information
**[16:49] Obo**
and saved the 7th Division and
the Kiheitai really was him.
**[16:53] Obo**
The reason he approached the Harusame
Elders and took part in the operation
**[16:58] Obo**
was to save his son?
**[17:01] U**
Oboro, he has not lied to us once.
**[17:05] (Flashback) UB**
It was to kill that rotten son
of mine before you lot did.
**[17:08] UB**
His eyes weren't lying.
**[17:10] UB**
He wasn't thinking of anything
but killing his son.
**[17:14] UB**
In other words,
**[17:17] UB**
he never thought about
killing anyone but his son.
**[17:23] UB**
The only exception
**[17:25] UB**
is people who get in the way
of their father-son spat.
**[17:29] Obo**
So he, too, is meant to be
an obstacle on your path?
**[17:34] U**
I'd prefer not to call him an obstacle.
**[17:38] U**
After all, I've finally found him...
**[17:40] U**
Someone who, though I had yet to meet him,
**[17:47] U**
might possibly be able to kill me.
**[18:02] Abu**
What a striking sight.
**[18:04] Abu**
Six of the twelve Harusame divisions
**[18:06] Abu**
have moved out just to kill some survivors?
**[18:10] Abu**
And half of them have moved out
to hunt down just one man?
**[18:15] UB**
All I see is a bunch of
maggots crawling about.
**[18:19] Abu**
Where I come from, a "striking sight"
is one that strikes you with despair.
**[18:24] UB**
Why are you coming with me?
**[18:27] UB**
Your best chance to run is
while I'm raising some hell.
**[18:30] Abu**
They're planning to wipe out the Yato.
**[18:34] Abu**
If we're gonna die anyway,
**[18:35] Abu**
it wouldn't be too bad to die
with a living Yato legend.
**[18:40] UB**
I'm the guy who's here
to kill your commander.
**[18:44] Abu**
It's ironic.
**[18:46] Abu**
To survive and see our
commander again, we have to
**[18:48] Abu**
cling to the power of the living legend,
the man who came to kill our commander.
**[18:55] UB**
Tell me what you know about the enemy.
**[18:58] Abu**
We're up against three of the
twelve Harusame divisions.
**[19:01] Abu**
The most dangerous one of them all is
the 1st Division, which leads the rest.
**[19:05] Abu**
Its commander, Shirei, is
**[19:07] Abu**
the longest serving and most
successful leader in the 12 Divisions.
**[19:10] Abu**
He's smart and strong.
**[19:12] Abu**
You could call him the best of the best.
**[19:14] UB**
Any others I should be wary of?
**[19:16] Abu**
The Three Mad Stars have
probably been reinstated, too.
**[19:20] UB**
The Three Mad Stars?
**[19:21] Abu**
Dangerous elements who were among
the strongest in the 12 Divisions,
**[19:26] Abu**
but were imprisoned for a long
time due to breaking the rules.
**[19:31] Abu**
The first...
**[19:32] Abu**
The only commander in the 12 Divisions
without any foot soldiers.
**[19:36] Abu**
But this scheming monk can take over
all troops on the battlefield.
**[19:39] Abu**
The 3rd Division Commander, Uranus Hankai.
**[19:44] Abu**
The second...
**[19:45] Abu**
has an eye that can read people's minds,
**[19:48] Abu**
and the moniker of "The Star Sword King."
**[19:50] Abu**
He is the best swordsman in the Harusame,
**[19:52] Abu**
2nd Division Commander, Pluto Bato.
**[19:58] Abu**
And lastly...
**[20:04] Abu**
The man possessing the most strength
and athleticism in the Harusame,
**[20:07] Abu**
the syndicate's best assassin...
**[20:10] G**
Good grief.
**[20:12] G**
How did my division get crushed
**[20:15] G**
by a man with such delicate
and effeminate features?
**[20:19] Kat**
I'm not effeminate. I'm Katsura.
**[20:21] Kat**
Out of the way, monkey.
**[20:23] Kat**
I have no time to feed you millet
dumplings or go to India with you.
**[20:28] G**
I'm not a monkey.
**[20:29] G**
I'm the Harusame's 4th Division Commander
and one of the Three Mad Stars,
**[20:35] G**
Neptune Shokaku!
**[20:37] Kat**
Talk about long!
**[20:38] Kat**
Your title is really long.
**[20:40] Kat**
It's too long to remember.
**[20:42] Kat**
Can't you make it more compact,
like my "I'm not Zura. I'm Katsura"?
**[20:46] Sho**
Yeah, but what am I supposed
to do? That's my title.
**[20:50] Kat**
I get wanting to say it all out loud.
**[20:52] Kat**
But if you throw that much information at
someone, they won't remember any of it.
**[20:56] G**
Well, I'm not telling you
to remember all of it.
**[20:59] Kat**
Oh, is that so?
**[20:59] Kat**
If that's how you're going to
roll, then I'll do the same.
**[21:02] Kat**
I'm not Zura!
**[21:03] Kat**
I'm a Joi leader and former
member of the Joi Elite Four,
**[21:06] Kat**
feared as the Rampaging
Noble and Runaway Kotaro,
**[21:09] Kat**
Katsura Kotaro, type AB,
**[21:11] Kat**
whose fortune for today is moderate.
If you sweat the small stuff, you'll regret it.
**[21:15] Kat**
Call me that!
**[21:15] G**
Uh, the latter half wasn't even a title!
**[21:18] Kat**
If you ask me, your "Three Mad Stars"
is just as pointless as "type AB."
**[21:24] Kat**
Like I could remember that!
**[21:25] G**
Yeah, that's impossible.
**[21:26] G**
Was the Three Mad Stars
thing that pointless?
**[21:29] Kat**
Basically, the important thing is
to pick what you want to say most
**[21:33] Kat**
and to do it in a clear and concise manner!
***SIGN*** Nobody cares, so could you get on with it?
**[21:35] G**
Fine, I get it!
**[21:37] G**
I get it, so don't say any more.
Damn, you're annoying.
**[21:39] Kat**
Do you really get it, monkey?
**[21:44] G**
I'm not a monkey.
**[21:46] G**
I'm Shokaku, a big-hearted type O!
**[21:49] G**
That's what you go with?!
**[21:52] Kat**
Bring it on, Sho... Shoke?
**[21:57] Kat**
You rotten monkey!
**[21:59] G**
In the end, you still couldn't remember it?!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] Kat**
So, yeah, I ended up fighting...
er... that... thing.
**[23:45] Gin**
I know you're hardheaded,
**[23:46] Gin**
but did your brain turn hard, too, Zura?
**[23:49] Kat**
I'm not Zura! I'm Katsura!
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part Four
**[23:50] Kat**
No, I'm...
***SIGN*** Zura
**[23:53] ---**
Harusame's 4th Division Commander and one of the Three Mad Stars, Neptune Shokaku,
**[23:53] ---**
has Zura (type AB) about
to go berserk on him?!
**[23:59] ---**
There's not much room in these
captions for such long titles,
**[23:59] ---**
so we like the nice, compact ones!
# 320 - Zura
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Please watch this program in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!!!!!
**[01:42] Gu**
So this is the samurai "art of war," huh?
**[01:45] Gu**
Imagine, blocking my attack head-on.
It's almost like magic or sorcery.
**[01:50] K**
The art of war isn't magic.
**[01:53] K**
"A single stick is enough to
get rid of a monkey in heat."
**[01:57] K**
That's the only line in the damn book!
**[02:01] Gu**
I like it!
**[02:02] Gu**
I don't like tricks myself.
**[02:05] Gu**
I've made it this far with a single stick.
**[02:07] Gu**
Even with ships that can travel the stars,
**[02:10] Gu**
we'd rather stand on the bodies of
our enemies than stand on the moon!
**[02:16] Gu**
Nothing's changed since
we crawled on the ground!
**[02:19] Gu**
All men are monkeys!
**[02:22] Gu**
Now, let's find out who's
king of monkey mountain!
**[02:33] Gu**
That was a rotten move.
**[02:35] Gu**
You're the one who said you'd
use just a single stick!
**[02:41] Gu**
I lost a tooth!
**[02:43] K**
Didn't you know?
**[02:46] K**
A stick always comes with balls.
**[02:56] K**
Elizabeth, run!
**[03:01] K**
I knew it! An ambush!
**[03:04] K**
Keep running under the cover of the smoke!
**[03:07] K**
No matter what happens, keep running!
**[03:09] K**
Keep looking forward and keep running!
**[03:11] K**
Can you do it?
***SIGN*** Why are you asking me this now?
***SIGN*** Katsura-san, we've been
running all this time.
***SIGN*** We've been running with you, believing you're heading for tomorrow.
***SIGN*** And we'll stay with you.
**[03:22] K**
Forgive me, Elizabeth, everyone.
**[03:25] K**
I can't win this battle as I am now.
**[03:29] K**
As a general who leads an organization,
**[03:33] K**
I can't beat that thing.
**[03:35] K**
So I have to go back.
**[03:38] K**
Not for my organization, or for my comrades...
**[03:42] K**
I must wield my sword for my own sake,
**[03:45] K**
as a lone monkey.
**[03:49] Gu**
Kotaro the Runaway.
**[03:51] Gu**
Isn't that what you said you were?
**[03:55] Gu**
Wouldn't have expected you to stay
behind so your comrades could escape.
**[04:00] K**
Nobody would call me that if I couldn't
tell which people I could run away from,
**[04:04] K**
and which I couldn't.
**[04:07] Gu**
I see.
**[04:08] Gu**
So you've accepted your fate?
**[04:10] K**
It's not accepting my fate.
**[04:12] K**
It's resolve.
**[04:14] K**
I won't run anywhere again.
**[04:28] (Flashback) Gu**
No, what are you talking about?
**[04:30] (Flashback) Gu**
It's gotta be Gintoki-san!
**[04:32] (Flashback) Gu**
You saw how bold he was when he launched
that surprise attack on that huge army.
**[04:36] (Flashback) Gu**
The way he fought like a demon!
**[04:38] (Flashback) Gu**
Nobody could beat him, enemy or ally!
**[04:41] (Flashback) Gu**
What are you talking about?
**[04:42] (Flashback) Gu**
That surprise attack wouldn't have worked
without the help of the Kiheitai.
**[04:46] (Flashback) Gu**
The tactics that overpowered
modern weapons!
**[04:49] (Flashback) Gu**
The strength to bring down a battleship!
**[04:51] (Flashback) Gu**
The strongest is our leader,
Takasugi Shinsuke!
**[04:55] (Flashback) Gu**
What are you people talkin' about?
**[04:57] (Flashback) Gu**
Who do you think is makin' this war possible?
**[05:01] (Flashback) Gu**
Soldiers. Weapons. Money.
**[05:04] (Flashback) Gu**
It's because somebody's providin'
all that stuff, right?
**[05:07] (Flashback) Gu**
In other words, the strongest
is the Dragon of Katsurahama,
**[05:10] (Flashback) Gu**
Sakamoto Tatsuma—
**[05:11] (Flashback) Gu**
No way.
**[05:12] (Flashback) Gu**
Yeah, no matter what, I know that's not true.
**[05:14] (Flashback) Gu**
His obsession with money and the loudness
of his voice would beat anyone, though.
**[05:20] (Flashback) Gu**
Oh, I see.
**[05:21] (Flashback) Gu**
I can whisper too, though.
**[05:24] (Flashback) Gu**
So it's either Gintoki-san
or Takasugi-san, right?
**[05:29] (Flashback) Gu**
Actually, what about Katsura-san?
**[05:32] (Flashback) Gu**
To be honest, I don't really understand him.
**[05:36] (Flashback) Gu**
He's kind of like the leader of the Four
Devas, who has calmed the rampages
**[05:40] (Flashback) Gu**
of Gintoki-san and Takasugi-san
since they were young.
**[05:43] (Flashback) Gu**
It's true that as a general
and leader, he's ideal.
**[05:47] (Flashback) Gu**
But his strength in war,
and his individual strength...
**[05:51] (Flashback) Gu**
It's hard to measure.
**[05:52] (Flashback) Gu**
His skill lies in steady defensive
battles rather than bold offensives.
**[05:56] (Flashback) Gu**
For that reason, Gintoki-san
usually wins the battle glory.
**[06:01] (Flashback) Gu**
He doesn't attack and doesn't
fall for provocations.
**[06:03] (Flashback) Gu**
You know what the enemy
calls the way he fights?
**[06:07] (Flashback) Gu**
"Kotaro the Runaway..."
**[06:10] (Flashback) Gu**
"Steady" sounds like a good thing,
**[06:12] (Flashback) Gu**
but it can also mean cowardice...
**[06:14] (Flashback) Gu**
Zura? A coward?
**[06:17] (Flashback) Gu**
You guys really don't know anything.
**[06:19] (Flashback) Gu**
Gintoki and Takasugi will laugh at you.
**[06:22] (Flashback) Gu**
S-Sakamoto-san? When did you show up?
**[06:26] (Flashback) Gu**
Um, I just got here.
**[06:28] (Flashback) Gu**
You say he's achieved less in battle
than Gintoki and the others?
**[06:31] (Flashback) Gu**
That's only because you haven't
noticed what he's done.
**[06:35] (Flashback) Gu**
It's harder to fight a losing
battle than a winning one.
**[06:39] (Flashback) Gu**
If you don't know when to retreat,
**[06:40] (Flashback) Gu**
you won't ever be able
to rebuild your forces.
**[06:43] (Flashback) Gu**
A battle without glory, where you protect
your allies instead of attackin' your foes...
**[06:48] (Flashback) Gu**
Only a master of war could be
entrusted with such a thing.
**[06:53] (Flashback) Gu**
Without Zura, we would've
lost the war a long time ago.
**[06:57] (Flashback) Gu**
So you're saying that Katsura-san
is the strongest, then?
**[07:01] (Flashback) Gu**
We're back to who's the strongest now?
**[07:04] (Flashback) Gu**
Well, you wouldn't know unless you
stripped the coward's skin off him.
***SIGN*** Grave of the Katsura Clan
**[07:11] (Flashback) Gu**
He lost his parents to
illness when he was little.
**[07:15] (Flashback) Gu**
His mansion was confiscated,
**[07:16] (Flashback) Gu**
and at one point, he and his
grandmother were homeless.
**[07:21] (Flashback) Gi**
Kotaro, what do you think is
the most important quality
**[07:25] (Flashback) Gi**
a general needs to lead an army?
**[07:30] (Flashback) Gi**
Whether he's a warrior who
can defeat a thousand foes
**[07:33] (Flashback) Gi**
or a wise strategist who knows
how to use his soldiers,
**[07:36] (Flashback) Gi**
if the general goes down, the battle is lost.
**[07:40] (Flashback) Gi**
If you die, you can't protect your soldiers,
your country, or anything else.
**[07:45] (Flashback) Gi**
Thus, a general must be the greatest
coward on the battlefield.
**[07:51] (Flashback) Gi**
So Kotaro, feel free to cry.
**[07:56] (Flashback) Gi**
You can cry. You can be weak.
**[07:59] (Flashback) Gi**
As long as the general lives,
**[08:01] (Flashback) Gi**
as long as you live,
**[08:03] (Flashback) Gi**
the Katsura clan will not die.
**[08:05] (Flashback) Gi**
It's okay if they call you a coward.
**[08:08] (Flashback) Gi**
Survive, Kotaro.
**[08:10] (Flashback) Gi**
No matter what they say about you,
**[08:14] (Flashback) Gi**
we know that you are a great general.
**[08:17] (Flashback) Gu**
He lost his grandmother too,
and was all alone in the world,
**[08:21] (Flashback) Gu**
becoming the head of the
Katsura clan at a young age.
**[08:24] (Flashback) Gu**
And as he bore that heavy burden,
he cloaked himself in a coward's skin.
**[08:29] (Flashback) Gi**
That's the boy they all say
is really smart, right?
**[08:32] (Flashback) Gi**
I heard there was talk of
someone adopting him,
**[08:35] (Flashback) Gi**
but he says that a samurai
must raise himself.
**[08:42] (Flashback) K**
*Grandma... It's tough being a general, huh?*
**[08:46] (Flashback) K**
*Even if you run from all danger*
**[08:48] (Flashback) K**
*and survive all by yourself,*
**[08:50] (Flashback) K**
*you can't escape the loneliness.*
**[08:52] (Flashback) K**
*You can't make it through the
night just by being a coward.*
**[08:56] (Flashback) K**
*So I'm going to be a samurai who's stronger
and more cowardly than anyone else.*
**[09:01] (Flashback) K**
*So that I can protect*
**[09:03] (Flashback) K**
*not only myself, but the comrades who
must make it through the night with me,*
**[09:07] (Flashback) K**
*I'll be strong, and a coward...*
**[09:11] (Flashback) Gu**
To protect his family line,
to protect his comrades,
**[09:15] (Flashback) Gu**
he's continued his cowardly battle.
**[09:18] (Flashback) Gu**
Even while people mock him
as Kotaro the Runaway.
**[09:21] (Flashback) Gu**
But if a general appeared whom
he could entrust everything to...
**[09:26] (Flashback) Gu**
If an enemy appeared whom he couldn't
defeat unless he bet everything...
**[09:29] (Flashback) Gu**
Once the coward's skin was stripped off,
**[09:33] (Flashback) Gu**
you might learn his real name.
**[09:54] (Flashback) G**
Zura... Zura...
**[09:56] (Flashback) G**
Hey, Zura...
**[09:58] (Flashback) G**
Want to try fighting me for once?
**[10:01] (Flashback) K**
Who the heck is Zura?
**[10:03] (Flashback) G**
You, obviously.
**[10:04] (Flashback) G**
It's too much effort to call you Katsura.
**[10:06] (Flashback) K**
It's just adding the "Ka"!
**[10:08] (Flashback) K**
Say people's names right!
**[10:09] (Flashback) G**
Whatever. Let's fight.
**[10:11] (Flashback) G**
I'm sick of fighting that idiot.
**[10:14] (Flashback) G**
It's obvious I'm going to win.
**[10:16] (Flashback) T**
Hey.
**[10:16] (Flashback) T**
I've got 57 wins and 56 losses. I'm winning.
**[10:20] (Flashback) T**
And it's no use inviting him.
**[10:23] (Flashback) T**
"A general shouldn't carelessly sully his
name with personal battles," he says.
**[10:27] (Flashback) K**
That's right.
**[10:28] (Flashback) K**
I'm glad you didn't get hurt.
**[10:30] (Flashback) G**
Then I'll be this "general"
so you don't have to.
**[10:34] (Flashback) ---**
What?
**[10:35] (Flashback) G**
It's because of that "general" thing that
you can't do what you want, right?
**[10:40] (Flashback) G**
I'll be your general.
**[10:42] (Flashback) G**
So when you're with me, just be Zura.
**[10:47] (Flashback) K**
Wh-What are you sayi—
**[10:48] (Flashback) G**
Now you can have personal battles
or whatever you want, right?
**[10:51] (Flashback) G**
And when you're here, you're the general.
**[10:53] (Flashback) T**
Don't just make someone else do it!
**[10:55] (Flashback) G**
It'll be easier if we all share the work.
***SIGN*** M T W Th F Sat Sun
***SIGN*** Takasugi Zura Off
**[10:58] (Flashback) G**
Okay, you do it from Monday to Wednesday.
**[10:59] (Flashback) G**
Zura can do it from Thursday to Saturday.
**[11:01] (Flashback) G**
I'll do it Sunday if I'm bored.
**[11:02] (Flashback) T**
Don't turn it into a shift system!
**[11:04] (Flashback) T**
You're barely doing it at all!
**[11:05] (Flashback) G**
So, what's a general?
**[11:07] (Flashback) G**
How much does it pay per hour?
**[11:08] (Flashback) T**
It doesn't pay anything!
**[11:09] (Flashback) T**
Instead, you pay others!
**[11:10] (Flashback) G**
Oh, like a shop general.
**[11:11] (Flashback) T**
What's a shop general?
**[11:12] (Flashback) T**
Don't you mean just a store manager?!
**[11:14] (Flashback) G**
But...
**[11:14] (Flashback) T**
You're an idiot, aren't you? You're an idiot!
**[11:16] (Flashback) G**
What did you say?!
**[11:17] (Flashback) K**
Draw your sword.
**[11:20] (Flashback) K**
You can't be a general.
**[11:22] (Flashback) K**
I'll make it clear who's
worthy to be a general.
**[11:29] (Flashback) G**
Fine by me! Let's do it, Zura!
***SIGN*** Sugar Content
**[11:31] (Flashback) K**
I'm not Zura! I'm Katsura!
**[11:36] K**
*I see...*
**[11:40] K**
*That's right.*
**[11:45] Gu**
It's a shame.
**[11:47] Gu**
With your skills, you could've
run one of the 12 Divisions.
**[11:52] Gu**
But it was fun, Katsura Kotaro.
**[12:00] K**
I'm not Katsura.
**[12:03] K**
I'm Zura!
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part Four
***SIGN*** Zura
**[12:12] K**
I'm not Katsura.
**[12:14] K**
I'm Zura!
**[12:27] Gu**
*He's totally different from before.*
**[12:31] Gu**
* He's attacking like a wild beast*
* that's given up on defense.*
**[12:34] Gu**
*Did he snap and forget who he was?*
**[12:36] Gu**
*But...*
**[12:37] Gu**
* In terms of number of blows,*
* he can't stop a real beast!*
**[12:48] Gu**
You bastard!
**[12:54] Gu**
*He didn't forget who he was...*
**[12:59] Gu**
*He just threw it aside,*
**[13:01] Gu**
*of his own will!*
**[13:04] Gu**
*He's sacrificing his own life to take mine!*
**[13:09] Gu**
*Impressive resolve.*
**[13:12] Gu**
You can't have my life,
but you've won my heart!
**[13:17] Gu**
The real war starts now!
**[13:19] Gu**
I'm begging you, samurai!
**[13:21] Gu**
Don't die yet!
**[13:31] Gu**
We're finally fighting like monkeys.
**[13:37] Gu**
The only weapons we've got
left are our own bodies.
**[13:43] Gu**
For us men, simple is best.
**[13:45] K**
Just your body?
**[13:47] K**
What are you talking about?
You can barely move your limbs.
**[13:51] Gu**
Unfortunately for you, I've still
got something up my sleeve.
**[13:55] K**
What a coincidence.
**[13:56] K**
So do I.
**[14:02] (Flashback) K**
Then it's settled.
**[14:04] (Flashback) K**
I, Katsura Kotaro, am the one
best suited to be a general.
**[14:07] (Flashback) G**
Stand up and open your eyes
if you're gonna sleep-talk.
**[14:10] (Flashback) G**
You can have the title of "most hard-headed."
**[14:13] (Flashback) G**
Isn't it important for a general to
admit when they're beaten, hard-head?
**[14:19] (Flashback) T**
If you ask me, none of you have
the polished looks of a general.
**[14:25] (Flashback) K**
Maybe.
**[14:27] (Flashback) K**
*But that's fine.*
**[14:29] (Flashback) K**
*Even if, someday, we're all
generals, leading our own packs,*
**[14:34] (Flashback) K**
*we should stay like this.*
**[14:37] (Flashback) K**
*When we come back here,
I'll forget everything*
**[14:40] (Flashback) K**
*and laugh with you.*
**[14:42] (Flashback) K**
*I'll cry with you.*
**[14:44] (Flashback) K**
*As plain old Zura...*
**[14:48] (Flashback) K**
*Together...*
**[14:52] (Flashback) K**
*Let's fight!*
**[14:58] K**
Sorry.
**[15:02] K**
I can give up my title of general,
**[15:05] K**
but I'm not giving my title of
"most hard-headed" to anyone.
**[15:08] Gu**
Commander!
**[15:10] Gu**
Stop it!
**[15:13] Gu**
No matter how many soldiers are left,
**[15:15] Gu**
if the general loses, the war is over.
**[15:19] Gu**
Also, a war isn't fought with your head.
**[15:23] Gu**
It's fought with your headbutts.
**[15:26] Gu**
We lost.
**[15:28] K**
Shokaku... You...
**[15:31] Gu**
I never did like working in a group.
**[15:35] Gu**
Laws, rules...
**[15:36] Gu**
I don't know how many times I've broken them.
**[15:39] Gu**
But the Harusame has neither the laws
needed to support an organization
**[15:42] Gu**
nor the freedom the pirates love.
**[15:45] Gu**
It's turned into just a toy for a single man.
**[15:49] Gu**
So I'm going to fight the
battles I want to fight.
**[15:55] K**
What does that man intend to do?
**[15:58] K**
He wants to take over the Harusame,
eliminate Takasugi and the rest of us rebels,
**[16:03] K**
and then what?
**[16:05] Gu**
No idea.
**[16:06] Gu**
All I know is that no matter what it is,
**[16:08] Gu**
neither we nor you people can stop it.
**[16:11] Gu**
The toy's just gotta dance
until all its limbs fall off.
**[16:16] K**
We're here of our own will.
**[16:19] K**
I've no intention of dancing in anyone's hand.
**[16:23] Gu**
I hope not.
**[16:25] Gu**
I think it's about time for your friends
to be guided to the dance party.
**[16:33] Gu**
All barrages have struck the enemy ships.
**[16:35] Gu**
The surprise attack was a success!
**[16:37] S**
Okay, push the attack!
**[16:39] S**
Attention, all Kaientai ships!
**[16:41] S**
Get the hell outta here!
**[16:43] Gu**
I'm amazed you can give such a
pessimistic order so optimistically.
**[16:47] S**
We can't beat those numbers
in a straight-up fight.
**[16:51] S**
So we need to poke 'em in the butt
**[16:53] S**
and get them as far from
the fight as possible.
**[16:56] S**
It doesn't matter if our outlook
is backward or even sideways.
**[17:00] S**
The path that I, Sakamoto Tatsuma,
walk always faces forward.
**[17:04] Gi**
Sheesh...
**[17:06] Gi**
Looks like the space conman is
doing just fine on the battlefield.
**[17:12] Gu**
Captain!
**[17:13] S**
What's going on?
**[17:14] S**
Did the enemy turn around already?
**[17:17] Gu**
I-It's not the enemy!
**[17:18] Gu**
It's our allies!
**[17:22] Gu**
What?
**[17:23] Gu**
We're being attacked by our allies?
**[17:25] Gu**
That's impossible!
**[17:26] Gu**
Is there a traitor?
**[17:28] Gu**
A-At any rate, you guys hurry up, too!
**[17:31] Gu**
Who are you?!
**[17:40] Gu**
It's no metaphor.
**[17:41] Gu**
For him, allies, enemies,
the battlefield itself...
**[17:45] Gu**
They're all toys for him to play with.
**[17:51] Gu**
Now dance.
**[17:56] Gu**
Captain, run!
**[17:57] Gu**
Our ship won't...
**[18:00] Gu**
Communications have been cut off!
**[18:02] S**
Fire smokescreen bombs!
**[18:03] S**
Get away from the other
ships as fast as you can!
**[18:05] S**
Listen, no matter how many times
they attack, don't shoot back!
**[18:09] S**
We need to go as fast as...
**[18:13] S**
Sorry, can we slow down just a bit?
**[18:15] M**
It doesn't look like they got sick of their
stupid captain and started a rebellion.
**[18:21] S**
What's goin' on aboard their ships?
**[18:23] M**
The communications show no
sign the enemy took over.
**[18:27] M**
And if they did betray us, they
wouldn't tell us to run, of course.
**[18:31] S**
Then what?
**[18:32] S**
This isn't the enemy or
our allies attackin' us,
**[18:35] S**
the ship is doin' it on its own?
**[18:38] M**
That's right.
**[18:40] M**
Hacking.
**[18:41] M**
By taking over the ship's control systems,
**[18:44] M**
they were able to take over
the Kaientai and our ships
**[18:46] M**
without using a single soldier.
**[18:48] M**
The enemy's got some kind of monster-level
hacker, if they can do this.
**[18:53] Gu**
*That's right.*
**[18:56] Gu**
*Your fleet is in my hands.*
**[19:00] Gu**
Who are you?
**[19:02] S**
Um, do you think you dialed the wrong ship?
**[19:06] S**
We're the Kaientai, not White Base.
**[19:09] Gu**
No, that's not a Zaku, Captain.
**[19:11] S**
You got a notepad?
**[19:13] S**
I can tell you how to contact
the Federation forces.
**[19:15] S**
The Zeon army screws up
and calls us all the time.
**[19:18] Gu**
Captain, that's not the Zeon army.
**[19:20] S**
Then is this the Zaku-Zaku scam I've
been hearin' about? You won't fool me!
**[19:25] Gu**
No, there's no such thing,
**[19:26] Gu**
and you believed he was a Zaku anyway!
**[19:28] Gu**
*I am Hankai, the Guru of Trickery,*
**[19:30] Gu**
*commander of the Harusame's 3rd Division*
**[19:33] Gu**
*and one of the Three Mad Stars.*
**[19:34] Gu**
He's subtly bragging about his name.
**[19:36] M**
So basically, this is all your doing, Zaku?
**[19:40] Gu**
How did you hear all that and
decide he was a Zaku, Vice Captain?!
**[19:43] Gu**
*Indeed.*
**[19:44] Gu**
* The one who took over your fleet and*
* deliberately didn't touch your flagship,*
**[19:49] Gu**
*was me, Gundam.*
**[19:52] S**
He switched it to Gundam!
**[19:53] S**
Did he figure he'd rather be a
Gundam than get called Zaku?!
**[19:56] H**
* You can either shoot down your*
* allies' ships and survive,*
**[19:59] H**
*or simply be shot down here.*
**[20:01] H**
*I thought I'd let you choose.*
**[20:05] M**
You bastard! Fine, we'll call you Zaku!
**[20:08] Gu**
Is that what you're choosing?!
**[20:09] H**
* Whichever you choose,*
* your defeat is assured.*
**[20:13] H**
* You've come all this way*
* to save your comrades,*
**[20:16] H**
*and you will give up everything for them.*
**[20:19] H**
*My Mono-Eye will record that moment.*
**[20:23] Gu**
He gave up! He's decided to live
the rest of his life as a Zaku!
**[20:27] H**
* You don't have long before*
* you must make your decision.*
**[20:35] Gu**
You guys!
**[20:36] H**
* Did you think it was just machines that*
* the Guru of Trickery could control?*
**[20:43] S**
What are you doing?
**[20:45] S**
Get a hold of yourselves!
**[20:46] M**
What's going on?
**[20:48] M**
They've all gone mad!
**[20:50] H**
* The 3rd Division is said to be*
* the only one without soldiers.*
**[20:56] H**
*But that's not true.*
**[20:58] H**
*You just can't see them.*
**[21:00] H**
*My soldiers are too small to see,*
**[21:03] H**
* but their numbers and powers*
* exceed the other divisions.*
**[21:07] H**
* Some can infiltrate the*
* enemy's central system,*
**[21:10] H**
*and others can infiltrate human brains*
**[21:13] H**
*and infect them.*
**[21:15] H**
* Yes, within my body are*
* countless nanomachine viruses...*
**[21:20] H**
*And you are toys that they control!*
**[21:22] H**
*You are my 3rd Division!*
**[21:27] Gu**
Captain!
**[21:28] Gu**
Sorry.
**[21:30] S**
Everybody, grit your teeth!
**[21:33] S**
Take care of the ship!
**[21:34] S**
Seal the entrance!
**[21:36] Gu**
B-But...
**[21:39] Gu**
Captain!
**[21:47] S**
Why'd you follow me?
**[21:49] Gu**
There are more than two choices.
**[21:51] Gu**
We can find Zaku, beat the crap out of him,
**[21:53] Gu**
and fix everything.
**[21:56] Gu**
And if you get infected, as vice captain,
I have to kill you immediately.
**[22:01] S**
Sheesh...
**[22:02] S**
So if you get infected, I have to kill you?
**[22:06] S**
I'm gonna end up gettin' killed myself.
**[22:08] Gu**
Don't worry about me being infected.
**[22:10] Gu**
I got infected a long time ago...
**[22:13] Gu**
with your stupidity!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo
Part Five
***SIGN*** Sakamoto Tatsuma... A strange man.
***SIGN*** The Two Fools
**[23:53] ---**
The next battle is between the
space trader Sakamoto Tatsuma
**[23:53] ---**
and the Mobile Suit... I mean,
the Guru of Trickery, Hankai!
**[23:58] ---**
The current shogun
Nobunobu's heart wavers,
**[23:58] ---**
and Sakamoto's unknown
past is revealed...
# 321 - The Two Fools
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] ---**
What's goin' on aboard their ships?
**[00:06] ---**
The enemy's got some kind of monster-level
hacker, if they can do this.
**[00:12] ---**
*Your fleet is in my hands.*
**[00:16] ---**
* You don't have long before*
* you must make your decision.*
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Please watch this program in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!!!!!
**[01:52] (Flashback) Gu**
The one best suited to sit on
that throne is not Shigeshige.
**[01:55] (Flashback) Gu**
It is you.
**[01:58] (Flashback) Gu**
You are the only one who
can save this country.
**[02:13] S**
Nobunobu-sama...
**[02:17] S**
Young Master...
**[02:17] S**
Nobunobu-sama...
**[02:25] S**
Sheesh, what a bunch of jerks.
**[02:28] S**
They're even attackin' our guest?
**[02:30] S**
I'm sorry my crew was so
rude, Shogun-sama.
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo
Part Five
***SIGN*** The Two Fools
***SIGN*** Harusame Forces
***SIGN*** Takasugi and Umibozu
***SIGN*** Gintoki vs. Bato
***SIGN*** Katsura vs. Shokaku
***SIGN*** Sakamoto vs. Hankai
**[02:44] ---**
Just like I thought.
**[02:46] ---**
Everyone who wasn't on the bridge is
bein' controlled by the enemy virus.
**[02:50] M**
I can see bite marks.
**[02:52] M**
Looks like it's spread via direct infection.
**[02:56] M**
It's just like Resident Evil.
**[02:58] S**
In the game, we'd just blow
their heads off with a Magnum,
**[03:01] S**
but since they're our allies,
all we can do is run.
**[03:03] M**
We've also got a Spelunker-level
weak-ass to take care of.
**[03:07] S**
Reality is such a bullshit game.
**[03:10] Gu**
I don't recall asking for help.
**[03:12] M**
I'm sure. And I don't recall helping you.
**[03:15] M**
I only followed the captain's orders.
**[03:18] Gu**
What are you planning?
**[03:20] Gu**
I'm the one who killed Shogun Shigeshige
**[03:23] Gu**
and put your comrades in such dire straits.
**[03:26] S**
If I intended to kill you, I wouldn't
have brought you on this ship.
**[03:30] Gu**
You're the one who said
I was no longer worth using.
**[03:33] Gu**
Even if you don't have a single
soldier to protect you,
**[03:36] Gu**
and you're forced to let the
enemy spare your pathetic life,
**[03:39] Gu**
you don't have the right to die.
**[03:41] Gu**
You have a duty to witness
the fate of the country,
**[03:44] Gu**
along with the effects your deeds had on it.
**[03:48] Gu**
No matter how much you
have to disgrace yourself.
**[03:51] Gu**
It doesn't matter if you're a
wise ruler or a foolish one.
**[03:54] Gu**
Once a man bears the
burden of leadin' a country,
**[03:56] Gu**
he can't expect dying to be that simple.
**[04:00] M**
Hey. We've got a call from the bridge.
**[04:02] M**
I tried to track the enemy's location
through their communications,
**[04:05] M**
but as I thought, they're carefully hidden.
**[04:07] S**
So we have to track down the Zaku
by fumblin' in the dark, huh?
**[04:11] S**
Who knows how long that'll take?
**[04:14] Gu**
Do you mean the mechanical man?
**[04:17] S**
D-Don't tell me...
**[04:23] S**
I guess the hardest thing to see
is what's right under your nose.
**[04:27] S**
The enemy's been aboard
this ship from the start,
**[04:29] S**
releasing the nanomachine
virus and watching us panic?
**[04:34] M**
So why hack the other ships
and have them attack us?
**[04:39] M**
You're absolutely sure you
saw him head this way, right?
**[04:43] Gu**
It's up to you whether or not you believe me.
**[04:46] Gu**
That won't change the truth in what I saw.
**[04:50] S**
Most likely, the attack and the virus
were both just smokescreens.
**[04:54] S**
His real goal is the Kairinmaru.
**[04:57] S**
The central system on the Kairinmaru is
equipped with the latest in firewalls.
**[05:02] S**
It ain't gonna be easy to infiltrate.
**[05:05] S**
In other words, what's goin' on right now
**[05:08] S**
is an attempt to buy time until the
enemy can take over the Kairinmaru.
**[05:12] S**
Mutsu, the enemy's in the control room.
**[05:15] S**
Let's hurry.
**[05:17] S**
*Not only did he save me, his enemy,*
**[05:19] S**
*but he believed me.*
**[05:20] S**
*Is he a big man, or just a big fool?*
**[05:23] S**
*Sakamoto Tatsuma...*
**[05:25] S**
*He's a strange man.*
**[05:28] S**
What's wrong, Shogun-sama?
**[05:30] S**
You're starin' at Mutsu's
ass and not sayin' a thing.
**[05:33] Gu**
What are you—
**[05:36] M**
Oh, no. It looks like the
Kairinmaru is rusting in places.
**[05:39] M**
It needs maintenance.
**[05:41] Background**
You little...
**[05:41] M**
Hey, captain. Switch places.
**[05:42] Background**
I would never be interested in
the ass of a low-born girl!
**[05:43] S**
Wait, that's dangerous!
**[05:45] S**
Okay then, Shogun-sama,
you can stare at my ass.
**[05:48] S**
And I can stare at Mutsu's ass...
**[05:53] M**
You can go get your ass
chewed on by the infected.
**[05:56] M**
I'll hurry on to the control
room in the meantime.
**[05:58] S**
W-Wait!
**[06:04] Gu**
You bastard!
**[06:06] Gu**
You let your crew treat you that way,
and you call yourself a captain?
**[06:09] S**
I don't wanna hear it from a shogun
who was abandoned by his retainers!
**[06:12] Gu**
I wasn't abandoned.
**[06:13] Gu**
I abandoned them!
**[06:14] Gu**
Just draw your gun!
**[06:15] S**
Hell no!
**[06:16] S**
Even if my men abandon me,
I won't abandon them!
**[06:19] S**
I'm a space trader!
**[06:21] S**
I have all kinds of space-stuff to
deal with a situation like this!
**[06:26] S**
The HikikomoRevolver!
**[06:28] S**
A gun that fires a net
that entangles the enemy,
**[06:30] S**
symbolizing the way that the net traps
modern kids and turns them into hikikomori.
**[06:36] K**
*So he's trying to immobilize the enemy?*
**[06:38] S**
Here goes.
**[06:43] S**
Okay, now they can't touch us.
**[06:46] S**
And we can't touch them, either.
**[06:47] K**
*I didn't expect him to use it like that.*
**[06:50] K**
*Sakamoto Tatsuma...*
**[06:52] K**
*Is he a big man, or just a big fool?*
**[06:54] K**
*I just don't understand him!*
**[06:56] K**
But we're stuck now, too!
**[06:59] S**
No need to worry.
**[07:01] S**
I thought this might happen, so...
**[07:04] S**
NEETly Rice Cakes!
**[07:05] S**
Scattering these and getting
your enemy to eat them
**[07:07] S**
symbolizes the way NEET society causes
a NEET to waste their potential by
**[07:11] S**
devouring their parents' income.
**[07:13] K**
Is he trying to delay the enemy?
**[07:15] S**
We can hang out here for a while now.
**[07:18] K**
*I didn't expect him to use it like that.*
**[07:20] K**
*Sakamoto Tatsuma...*
**[07:22] K**
*Is he a big man, or just a big fool?*
**[07:24] K**
*I don't understand him at all!*
**[07:26] M**
He's just a big fool, obviously!
**[07:28] M**
Are you so useless, you make your
retainers play the straight man?!
**[07:32] M**
You fools!
**[07:34] S**
My steamed buns!
**[07:36] S**
Hey, I didn't say you could have those!
**[07:38] S**
When you get back to normal,
you'll pay for this.
**[07:39] K**
*He's definitely just a fool.*
**[07:42] K**
* Both he and I are fools who can't*
* even get a single one of our men*
**[07:45] K**
*to do what we want.*
**[07:46] K**
*So why doesn't he give up?*
**[07:49] K**
* Why does he look as if*
* he knows he's not alone?*
**[07:53] K**
*What's the difference between him and me?*
**[07:55] K**
*I don't like it!*
**[07:57] K**
*I don't—*
**[07:59] S**
Close the door!
**[08:03] S**
Where's the enemy?
**[08:06] M**
Were we wrong?
**[08:08] H**
No, I'm here.
**[08:15] S**
Mutsu!
**[08:17] H**
The enemy's here.
**[08:19] H**
Right inside this man.
**[08:22] S**
Nobunobu, you...
**[08:24] K**
*M-My body isn't doing what I want it to!*
**[08:30] K**
*I see!*
**[08:31] K**
*By that time, my body was already...*
**[08:34] H**
Yes.
**[08:35] H**
It's not yours anymore.
**[08:38] H**
The 3rd Division Commander, Hankai,
**[08:40] H**
has no body of his own.
**[08:42] H**
If he did have a body,
it would only be a container.
**[08:46] H**
What's inside you now is me.
**[08:50] S**
So you invaded Nobunobu's body to get at me?
**[08:54] H**
Your guess was wrong.
**[08:56] H**
I can take over the systems
on this ship with my virus.
**[09:00] H**
As you saw, I took over your crew.
**[09:02] H**
And...
**[09:08] H**
Your last remaining companion, too.
**[09:10] H**
You're all that's left, Sakamoto Tatsuma.
**[09:15] H**
An army without soldiers.
**[09:17] H**
That's what they call the 3rd Division.
**[09:19] H**
But it appears that name
is better suited to you.
**[09:25] H**
The Kaientai you once commanded
will become my 3rd Division.
**[09:31] H**
Don't worry as you die.
**[09:33] H**
Nobody will cry over your death.
**[09:41] S**
Even if my men abandon me,
I won't abandon them!
**[09:48] S**
You want my crew and my ship?
**[09:51] S**
Then let me give you a warning as a merchant.
**[09:54] S**
If you want to buy a company,
**[09:56] S**
you should investigate it thoroughly first.
**[10:01] S**
Unfortunately, my company's
been responsible for a death,
**[10:04] S**
so we're hellbound anyway.
**[10:06] Gu**
* A serious problem has occurred*
* with the control system.*
**[10:09] Gu**
*The system will now move to emergency mode.*
**[10:12] Gu**
*All crew, please evacuate immediately.*
**[10:13] H**
Have you gone mad?
**[10:14] H**
Did you decide to destroy the Kaientai and
this ship rather than lose everything?
**[10:19] S**
A man who's not willing
to go down with his ship
**[10:22] S**
doesn't have the right to fly with it.
**[10:25] S**
Are you willing to do that?
**[10:27] K**
*Don't tell me he...*
**[10:36] H**
The damage to the system is minimal.
**[10:39] H**
If I compensate for the
lost functionality myself,
**[10:41] H**
it can be restored easily.
**[10:42] H**
You will be the only one to sink,
**[10:45] H**
Sakamoto Tatsuma!
**[10:47] N**
*That's what Sakamoto Tatsuma wanted!*
**[10:50] N**
*He shot the control device to try to*
**[10:52] N**
*rip out the enemy that's inside me...*
**[10:56] N**
*He still won't abandon me, after all this?*
**[10:59] N**
*Even when I...*
**[11:05] H**
Sorry, Shogun,
**[11:07] H**
but you should save your thinking
for when you're alone.
**[11:10] H**
I can hear every detail of your plan.
**[11:18] H**
Shogun, I can tell exactly
what you're thinking.
**[11:24] H**
Is this feeling anger, or sadness?
**[11:28] H**
The only person who tried to
protect you died for your sake.
**[11:32] H**
Now nobody's left, huh?
**[11:35] H**
You were used by everyone,
**[11:38] H**
lifted up, and placed at the
top just like they wanted.
**[11:41] H**
And that's why you...
**[11:43] K**
*Yes.*
**[11:44] K**
*I used everyone, too.*
**[11:48] K**
*But when I sat at the top, I realized...*
**[11:51] K**
*I thought this was what people wanted,*
**[11:54] K**
*but nobody was there.*
**[11:57] K**
*Why did I come all this way?*
**[12:02] K**
There was no reason.
**[12:05] K**
You were empty from the start.
**[12:07] K**
You could only find your own
goals by being used by others.
**[12:12] K**
This isn't the top.
**[12:14] K**
It's just a place for you playthings
that have been thrown away...
**[12:18] H**
Just a graveyard for junk.
**[12:21] H**
Useless junk like you can just
lie on the ground and rot.
**[12:24] H**
For eternity.
**[12:31] (Flashback) S**
It doesn't matter if you're a
wise ruler or a foolish one.
**[12:33] (Flashback) S**
Once a man bears the
burden of leadin' a country,
**[12:35] (Flashback) S**
he can't expect dying to be that simple.
**[12:37] K**
*Sakamoto Tatsuma, why did you let me live?*
**[12:42] K**
* Now that I'm the last one left,*
* what is it you want me to do?*
**[12:47] H**
You...
**[12:51] K**
*No, I won't ask any more questions.*
**[12:59] K**
*I have to find the answers myself.*
**[13:03] K**
* I have to make it to the*
* top on my own two legs!*
**[13:08] (Flashback) S**
For us as well as you,
the real battle is comin' up.
**[13:12] K**
Now!
**[13:18] H**
Don't tell me...
**[13:21] H**
Even when infected, you're
still in control of yourself?
**[13:25] K**
That is my fight, Sakamoto Tatsuma!
**[13:37] Gu**
Climb!
**[13:38] Gu**
We can't!
**[13:39] Gu**
The damage to the control system is bad!
**[13:41] Gu**
At this rate, we're going to crash!
**[13:43] Gu**
No! They've caught up to us!
**[13:45] Gu**
We're doomed!
**[13:51] Gu**
*Come in, Kairinmaru!*
**[13:53] Gu**
*We will support your ship.*
**[13:55] Gu**
* While we do, put all your energies*
* into restoring the system!*
**[13:58] Gu**
Y-You guys...
**[13:59] Gu**
You took back your ship?
**[14:00] Gu**
Hey, look!
**[14:02] Gu**
Our crewmates who were controlled by
the virus have returned to their senses?
**[14:05] Gu**
*Get moving!*
**[14:06] Gu**
*Now it's our turn to save the captain!*
**[14:10] K**
So a battle between two
leaders with no soldiers
**[14:13] K**
was decided by their soldiers?
**[14:17] K**
He never abandoned his soldiers.
**[14:20] K**
And you never abandoned him.
**[14:23] K**
That's something rarer and
more valuable than the
**[14:27] K**
greatest ruler or the most loyal retainer.
**[14:31] K**
You know it's true because I'm saying it.
**[14:34] M**
A ruler is like an empty ship.
**[14:37] M**
Only after it has a crew can it sail
**[14:40] M**
toward where everyone wants to go.
**[14:43] M**
That's why the crew never
abandons their ship.
**[14:46] M**
And the ship tries its best to
protect the crew from the waves.
**[14:50] M**
Your ship couldn't stand
under the weight of its task.
**[14:54] M**
No matter how great the ship,
**[14:56] M**
an empty ship with only one
person on board can't go anywhere.
**[15:00] K**
If that's the case, where is this
rickety ship of yours heading?
**[15:06] M**
If I knew the answer to that,
this would all be far easier.
**[15:09] M**
Maybe you, even as you
stand on board, are its goal.
**[15:13] M**
In the wide, open sea, where
there are no landmarks,
**[15:16] M**
even the waves a ship leaves
in its wake can become a guide.
**[15:19] M**
That's why this rickety
ship will take even you in.
**[15:22] M**
Mistakes, glory, good, evil, dreams, karma...
**[15:26] M**
It's carrying all that.
**[15:28] M**
Even so, the rickety ship keeps
going, searching for a tomorrow
**[15:31] M**
where everyone can smile.
**[15:33] K**
*That explains why it doesn't sink.*
**[15:35] K**
*To you, even I'm not deadweight, but a sail.*
**[15:42] S**
This is the only way I can fight, you know.
**[15:48] (Flashback) Gu**
Sakamoto-san, hang in there!
**[15:50] (Flashback) Gu**
Sakamoto-san!
**[15:51] (Flashback) S**
Don't make such a fuss.
**[15:53] (Flashback) S**
Our leader will scold you.
**[15:56] (Flashback) T**
You're the one who's getting a scolding.
**[15:58] (Flashback) T**
You're supposed to be the
dragon of Katsurahama,
**[16:00] (Flashback) T**
and you got your butt kicked.
**[16:02] (Flashback) T**
What happened?
**[16:03] (Flashback) Gu**
He was immobilized on the battlefield.
**[16:05] (Flashback) Gu**
He was trying to carry a wounded enemy,
**[16:13] (Flashback) Gu**
and both he and the enemy were...
**[16:15] (Flashback) T**
Looks like you really do need a lecture.
**[16:18] (Flashback) S**
Give me a break.
**[16:20] (Flashback) S**
I was lucky to survive,
**[16:22] (Flashback) S**
and now you're trying to finish me?
**[16:24] (Flashback) T**
As a samurai,
**[16:25] (Flashback) T**
you're already dead.
**[16:27] (Flashback) S**
So I was right, huh?
**[16:28] (Flashback) S**
It's going to suck not being able
to peel an apple with a sword.
**[16:32] (Flashback) T**
You were a terrible samurai to begin with.
**[16:36] (Flashback) T**
It's an idiotic ending, so it suits you.
**[16:38] (Flashback) G**
He ain't dead.
**[16:41] (Flashback) G**
There's more to being a samurai
than swinging a sword.
**[16:44] (Flashback) G**
There's more to war than killing the enemy.
**[16:46] (Flashback) G**
Sakamoto Tatsuma's wars
**[16:48] (Flashback) G**
aren't the kind of petty things
that can be ended with a stick.
**[16:52] (Flashback) T**
You remember the enemy's face?
**[16:54] (Flashback) S**
You guys...
**[16:55] (Flashback) T**
Unfortunately, I like those petty wars.
**[16:58] (Flashback) G**
You fight your war.
**[17:01] (Flashback) G**
We'll fight ours.
**[17:19] (Flashback) G**
Looks like I drew the winning card.
**[17:22] (Flashback) G**
We finally meet.
**[17:27] B**
Yes, that's what you said.
**[17:30] B**
Now it's my turn to say it.
**[17:34] B**
We finally meet,
**[17:36] B**
samurai.
**[17:39] Gu**
Gin-san!
**[17:40] G**
Hey.
**[17:42] G**
Somebody drew on your face.
**[17:45] G**
Your forehead!
**[17:46] G**
You should go look at a mirror!
**[17:48] G**
No, not with the evil eye.
The ones below it.
**[17:50] G**
Oh, damn, I just realized
your eyes are sewn shut.
**[17:53] G**
Pirates play the craziest
pranks when you're asleep!
**[17:55] G**
Hey, you guys watching from the shadows!
**[17:57] G**
I can tell you're laughing!
**[18:00] G**
Even if you're pirates, that's going too far.
**[18:02] G**
You can't just sew his eyelids shut!
**[18:03] G**
He can't even see the drawing
you made on his forehead now!
**[18:06] G**
You don't get to see his reaction!
**[18:08] G**
And listen, you need to tell
them when they're going too far.
**[18:12] G**
Here, use this to wipe it off.
**[18:13] G**
Oh, you can't see it?
**[18:15] G**
You may be the type that's
easily picked on, but still...
**[18:18] G**
There's a fine line between
picking on and bullying.
**[18:20] G**
Huh?
**[18:21] G**
Man, I can't get this to come off.
**[18:28] B**
I thought my face was easier
to remember than most.
**[18:31] B**
But if you're a swordsman,
**[18:33] B**
there's no way you could
have forgotten this sword.
**[18:35] B**
The sword of the Star Sword King, the
greatest of all swordsman in the universe!
**[18:43] Gu**
Wh-What's going on?
**[18:45] Gu**
Who is that monster?
**[18:49] Gu**
He's Bato, one of the Three Mad Stars
**[18:50] Gu**
and commander of the Harusame's 2nd Division!
**[18:53] Gu**
He's the strongest individual
fighter the Harusame has.
**[18:56] Gu**
He's hunted and slain all the
swordsmen of other worlds,
**[18:59] Gu**
and now he's coming to hunt
the swordsmen of Earth.
**[19:01] Gu**
No, maybe he's here to hunt the
prey that escaped him before!
**[19:06] Gu**
Gin-san!
**[19:07] G**
Go.
**[19:08] G**
Looks like he's my guest.
**[19:10] Gu**
A samurai's pride is on the line in this battle.
**[19:13] Gu**
If he loses, he'll join the
countless samurai he's defeated.
**[19:17] Gu**
You would have us bet all the
pride of every samurai on you?
**[19:21] G**
I've got no intention
of carrying that burden.
**[19:24] G**
But no matter how many people
he's beaten, or where,
**[19:28] G**
I've beaten the guy you bet on many times.
**[19:32] G**
And he's beaten me.
**[19:34] G**
That pride, I will never abandon.
**[19:44] Gu**
Let's go, kid.
**[19:45] Gu**
If you're a samurai, fight a battle
worthy of the man you bet on!
**[19:49] Gu**
They will return. I know it.
**[19:51] Gu**
Let's show them...
**[19:53] Gu**
Let's show the universe what a samurai is!
**[20:05] B**
Did you remember this moment, samurai?
**[20:09] B**
The moment of joy that only we share,
**[20:10] B**
as we entrust our lives to our blades?
**[20:13] B**
I had given up on any blade
ever threatening my life.
**[20:17] B**
You were the only one who ever
gave me a moment like this!
**[20:21] B**
Samurai!
**[20:23] B**
I've missed you!
**[20:27] G**
* It's like he can see where*
* I'm going to strike next!*
**[20:32] B**
That's right.
**[20:35] B**
I can see it.
**[20:36] B**
My eye sees all.
**[20:40] B**
My species once had no
ears or mouths, I heard.
**[20:45] B**
We did all our communication with this
one eye that's called Enlightenment.
**[20:51] B**
I closed my eyes and ears to
awaken my "Enlightenment,"
**[20:55] B**
which vanished from my
species in the distant past.
**[20:58] G**
That's right...
**[20:59] G**
He's the one who...
**[21:06] G**
I was the one who was looking for you.
**[21:11] G**
Give back my 300 yen!
**[21:14] B**
No, that's not right.
**[21:15] G**
What? You're not the guy who
swiped the 300 yen I found first?
**[21:19] B**
No, that's not me.
**[21:20] G**
Wait, maybe it was 400 yen...
**[21:22] B**
It doesn't matter whether
it was 400 yen or 300 yen.
**[21:24] B**
I can read minds and I have a different
looking face, and his was a mole.
**[21:27] B**
Everything is different about us!
**[21:28] G**
No, no, no. I didn't forget!
**[21:30] G**
I remember!
**[21:31] G**
*I see.*
**[21:33] G**
*He's the one who...*
**[21:37] G**
I've come to give back your 300 yen!
**[21:40] B**
No, I wasn't the guy who lent you 300 yen.
**[21:42] G**
Yeah, that's right.
**[21:43] G**
It was actually more like
600 yen, not 300 yen...
**[21:46] B**
It doesn't matter whether
it was 600 yen or 300 yen.
**[21:49] B**
Seriously, it has nothing to do with 300 yen.
**[21:51] B**
You're insulting me. I spent
ten years looking for you.
**[21:55] G**
I swear I remember!
**[21:56] G**
I've been looking for you for ten years, too!
**[21:58] B**
I remember that battle like it was yesterday.
**[22:05] B**
Pakuyasa!
**[22:06] G**
You've got the wrong guy, too!
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] G**
You get people's names wrong.
**[23:41] G**
You get people's faces wrong.
**[23:43] G**
You rely too much on
that eye on your forehead.
**[23:45] G**
I don't think that's a good thing.
**[23:47] G**
When you receive a business card, you
should write down something memorable
**[23:49] G**
about them on the back.
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo
Part 6
**[23:51] ---**
Next time: Ten Years.
***SIGN*** Ten Years
***SIGN*** Next time, the unknown past of Pakuyasa...
***SIGN*** ...Forget that, who the hell is he, anyway?
***SIGN*** But more importantly,
***SIGN*** *he* is finally about to awaken...
# 322 - Ten Years
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:07] Gu**
When that man
**[00:11] Gu**
ran over the battlefield,
amidst the bloody winds,
**[00:13] Gu**
he was truly an oni.
**[00:20] Gu**
So you're the boss?
**[00:22] Gu**
Looks like I drew the winning card.
**[00:25] Gu**
We finally meet.
**[00:29] (Flashback) Gu**
Samurai.
**[00:31] (Flashback) Gu**
What is your name?
**[00:34] (Flashback) Gu**
Pakuyasa!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
**[02:08] (Flashback) Gu**
Pakuyasa!
**[02:10] G**
No, that's not me.
**[02:13] G**
That wasn't me.
**[02:14] B**
Don't play dumb.
**[02:16] B**
You can deceive the eyes of others,
**[02:18] B**
but you cannot deceive my enlightened eye,
**[02:21] B**
Pakuyasa.
**[02:22] G**
I'm not Pakuyasa. I'm the White Yasha.
***SIGN*** Please watch this program in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[02:26] B**
It is indeed possible that
I got the name wrong.
**[02:29] B**
But even if my eyes and ears are closed,
**[02:31] B**
I can perceive everything with this eye.
**[02:34] B**
That flabby double chin of yours,
and your Idaho accent,
**[02:37] B**
definitely belong to Pakuyasa.
**[02:39] G**
No, that's completely wrong.
**[02:41] G**
You're describing a different person.
What is that eye looking at?
**[02:43] B**
And just like it was then, your heart
is filled with thoughts of one person...
**[02:49] B**
Is it your master?
**[02:52] B**
Or your friend, or the
object of your revenge?
**[02:57] (Flashback) P**
*I can't lose!*
**[02:59] (Flashback) P**
*Until I reach him,*
**[03:01] (Flashback) P**
*I can't lose to anyone else!*
**[03:07] (Flashback) G**
You want to be my student?
**[03:09] (Flashback) G**
Sorry, but I've never tried
to recruit new students.
**[03:12] (Flashback) G**
If you really want to be my student,
**[03:15] (Flashback) G**
go buy me some yakisoba bread.
**[03:18] (Flashback) P**
I cannot lose
**[03:20] (Flashback) P**
until I bring him this bread!
**[03:24] G**
Yeah, that's me.
**[03:27] ---**
Huh?
**[03:28] G**
There was once this kid who came to me
and said he wanted to be my student.
**[03:33] G**
But I figured he wouldn't last
a minute on a battlefield,
**[03:35] G**
so I put him in charge of supplies.
**[03:37] G**
He was all about appearances.
**[03:39] G**
Everyone called him Pakuyasa.
**[03:42] G**
I see.
**[03:43] G**
I was wondering why this
wasn't making sense.
**[03:45] G**
So you spent a decade looking for
the yakisoba bread supplier, huh?
**[03:51] G**
He had no prowess with a sword,
so he quickly left the battle
***SIGN*** White Onibito
**[03:56] G**
and opened up a candy store
called White Onibito,
**[03:59] G**
but someone sued him,
**[04:01] G**
so next he opened a place
called White Pantyhose
***SIGN*** White Pantyhose
**[04:03] G**
and was arrested for public indecency.
**[04:05] G**
Now he's doing shady part-time jobs.
**[04:08] G**
I wrote down his address on this.
**[04:10] G**
If you want to go see him, why not—
***SIGN*** Pakuyasa
**[04:14] G**
You're telling me that I,
the Star Sword King,
**[04:16] G**
failed to defeat one of your students
and spent ten years searching for him?
**[04:21] G**
If that's true,
**[04:23] G**
then the man whose life as a
swordsman ended at my hand
**[04:27] G**
is an insect worth even less than that.
**[04:29] G**
I told you, I can see you!
***SIGN*** Pakuyasa
**[04:32] G**
You can't see a thing.
**[04:34] G**
You haven't even seen the
tip of a samurai's topknot.
**[04:39] G**
If you want to know, then use that
eyeball to look deep inside me.
**[04:43] G**
It might be an abyss that you
can never come back from.
**[04:51] B**
I'll do that,
**[04:53] B**
right after I cut your belly open.
**[04:54] B**
Drop the act.
**[04:56] B**
You deflected the blade at the
last moment to avoid a fatal blow.
**[05:00] B**
The next action you'll take is...
**[05:03] B**
Below!
**[05:05] B**
You'll twist your torso to avoid
a deep wound and counterattack.
**[05:08] B**
Then a spin kick to keep the pressure up.
**[05:09] B**
An attack from a blind spot!
**[05:16] B**
What's wrong?
**[05:17] B**
Is this what's deep inside a samurai?
**[05:20] B**
The old you...
**[05:22] B**
No, your student, was much stronger.
**[05:47] G**
* This is... a projection*
* of murderous intent.*
**[05:51] G**
* He's using my eye's ability, to put pressure*
* on me with just his murderous intent!*
**[05:55] G**
*This is the same feeling as before...*
**[05:57] G**
Maybe it's bad to have
vision that's too good.
**[06:00] G**
If your eyes take in all that you see,
**[06:03] G**
you'll be so busy looking at
everything, you'll miss out
**[06:06] G**
on what you really want to see.
**[06:08] B**
I see...
**[06:10] B**
What I fought back then
wasn't your student.
**[06:15] B**
It was the murderous intent behind
him that you threw at me!
**[06:22] B**
Back then,
**[06:23] B**
the worldly thoughts of your overzealous
student caused me to lose sight of you.
**[06:28] B**
But this time, that won't happen.
**[06:30] B**
Your target is the life of a swordsman.
**[06:36] B**
And I'm after
**[06:38] B**
the real you!
**[06:44] B**
* What does a swordsman think of when*
* he realizes his own death is upon him?*
**[06:49] B**
* What does he think of in the*
* last moments before his death?*
**[06:54] B**
*The answer... is nothing.*
**[06:58] B**
* To accept the irrationality of death,*
* a swordsman simply empties himself.*
**[07:03] B**
* An emptiness where even true*
* despair no longer exists.*
**[07:06] B**
*Thus, when I see this emptiness in a foe,*
**[07:09] B**
*I realize...*
**[07:13] B**
*that I have won, and I am alive!*
**[07:18] G**
* I'll have eggs sunny-side-up*
* for breakfast tomorrow.*
**[07:21] B**
*No!*
**[07:22] B**
*He's still far away from death!*
**[07:29] G**
Too bad.
**[07:30] G**
That one wasn't me, either.
**[07:32] G**
I told you, your eye's too good.
**[07:36] G**
Even without a giant eyeball like that,
**[07:39] G**
I can see exactly what's
inside you right now.
**[07:43] G**
Want me to tell you?
**[07:48] G**
You're empty.
**[08:03] B**
You're the second one...
**[08:05] B**
You're the second person whose
mind my eye couldn't see.
**[08:09] B**
One is a man who thinks about
tomorrow's breakfast
**[08:12] B**
as he stands next to the abyss of death.
**[08:16] B**
The other is empty even as he is alive.
**[08:20] B**
What is that thing to you?
**[08:23] B**
Do you intend to fight it?
**[08:26] G**
That's what I want to know.
**[08:27] G**
I wish you could use that
eye of yours to find out.
**[08:31] B**
Even with my eye open, I couldn't
see the outcome of a battle
**[08:34] B**
between two men I don't understand.
**[08:38] B**
You're a man who's lived
with death by his side.
**[08:42] B**
The death of others, your own death,
**[08:44] B**
they've always been close enough
for you to reach out and touch.
**[08:48] B**
And you still live that way.
**[08:51] B**
To you, breakfast and death
aren't that different.
**[08:55] B**
They're just a normal part of your life.
**[09:00] B**
But to that man, there is no life or death.
**[09:03] B**
How would you fight something so empty?
**[09:07] G**
Unfortunately, I don't have a nice eyeball
like you that can see this and that.
**[09:13] G**
It's all I can do to pursue
one thing in front of me.
**[09:16] G**
So whether it's the abyss of death
**[09:20] G**
or an empty void,
**[09:22] G**
I won't fight for the manju
offered to my grave.
**[09:25] G**
I'll fight for tomorrow's breakfast.
**[09:30] G**
That's all.
**[09:35] B**
It's ironic.
**[09:37] B**
Now that my eye is closed,
I can see for the first time.
**[09:40] B**
That's no endless abyss.
**[09:42] B**
He's just endlessly stupid.
**[09:53] Gu**
Shirei-sama!
**[09:54] Gu**
The Hotei's been sunk, right after the Fuso!
**[09:58] Gu**
What are you doing?
**[09:59] Gu**
You're not fighting a fleet!
**[10:01] Gu**
Just one old guy!
**[10:05] A**
What's going on here?
**[10:07] A**
The son, the dad...
**[10:09] A**
They really look like they might
destroy the Harusame on their own.
**[10:14] A**
If this is going to be a legendary battle,
**[10:17] A**
will there be anything for us to do in it?
**[10:24] A**
We can say there were those who
watched the legends' backs!
**[10:31] Gu**
Hurry!
**[10:32] Gu**
Protect the commander's life at any cost!
**[10:38] Gu**
Commander!
***SIGN*** Sakamoto
***SIGN*** Harusame Forces
***SIGN*** Gintoki
***SIGN*** Katsura
***SIGN*** Takasugi's Group
***SIGN*** Matako, Kagura
**[11:05] Gi**
*Where is Shinsuke-sama?*
**[11:07] Gi**
*Where is he?!*
**[11:18] Gi**
Shinsuke-sama!
**[11:33] Gu**
Bansai-san!
**[11:37] B**
*Not yet...*
**[11:38] B**
*Don't die yet, Shinsuke.*
**[11:41] (Flashback) T**
If you're going to be judged
and die at the nation's hands,
**[11:44] (Flashback) T**
why not die for me instead, Murderer Bansai?
**[11:49] (Flashback) B**
Then what will you die for?
**[11:53] (Flashback) T**
I won't die.
**[11:55] (Flashback) T**
No matter whose corpse I need to step on,
**[11:58] (Flashback) T**
I won't die until I crush this country.
**[12:04] B**
*That's what you bragged to me*
**[12:06] B**
* when you were going to be*
* executed the next day, right?*
**[12:16] Gu**
Bansai-san!
**[12:19] Gu**
Oh, my...
**[12:20] Gu**
It appears the Three Mad Stars
weren't enough to stop you.
**[12:27] Gu**
You can't trust stuff from space.
**[12:29] Gu**
You can only trust stuff made on Earth.
**[12:35] O**
I can't let any of you meet up with
the survivors of the rebel army.
**[12:42] O**
The students of Shoyo will
never meet again in this life.
**[12:49] B**
I'm sorry, Shinsuke.
**[12:53] B**
I promised to use this life for your sake.
**[12:58] B**
I didn't expect I'd waste it here.
**[13:03] B**
Kid, you've got five minutes.
**[13:06] B**
I'll hold them off.
**[13:08] B**
While I do, get out of here.
**[13:10] Gu**
Bansai-san, wait!
**[13:13] Gu**
Sadaharu!
**[13:15] B**
I see...
**[13:16] B**
So you'll listen to the
last request of a samurai?
**[13:21] B**
Then, if you see him,
will you tell him something?
**[13:26] B**
*Shinsuke...*
**[13:28] B**
*This country isn't dead yet.*
**[13:38] B**
*Even hurt, and crawling on the ground...*
**[13:41] B**
* We're not giving up,*
* but still trying to rise.*
**[13:45] B**
*We're writhing from the pain,*
**[13:49] B**
* but we're going forward,*
* and trying to change.*
**[13:55] Gu**
*I paid my debt.*
**[13:57] B**
*So Shinsuke, you must rise once more, too.*
**[14:05] B**
*You promised me, right?*
**[14:08] B**
*Your enemy is still standing.*
**[14:11] B**
*Your friend is still fighting!*
**[14:16] B**
*So you must fight once more.*
**[14:20] B**
* Become the enemy of this country as it*
* is reborn and destroy it, if you want.*
**[14:25] B**
* Or become its friend,*
* and watch over its fate.*
**[14:34] B**
*Either is fine.*
**[14:36] B**
*But do one thing...*
**[14:44] B**
*When you die,*
**[14:47] B**
*die next to your friend.*
**[14:52] Gu**
Bansai-san!
**[14:56] Gu**
Stop!
**[15:29] Gu**
So he has actually
**[15:32] Gu**
come back here?
**[15:37] T**
* The sky looked like it was*
* about to cry at any minute.*
**[15:41] T**
*I guess that's where I came down from.*
**[15:46] T**
*I try to think back on my hazy memories...*
**[15:49] T**
* Was I the first rain that came*
* down from a gloomy sky that*
**[15:53] T**
*could no longer hold it back?*
**[15:56] T**
* Or was I the last rain that fell down from*
* a sobbing sky that was trying to stop?*
**[16:04] T**
*It feels like it was both,*
**[16:06] T**
*and it feels like it was neither.*
**[16:11] T**
*The one thing I can say*
**[16:15] T**
*is that*
**[16:18] T**
*I'm sick of rain.*
**[16:23] T**
Attention, Kiheitei.
**[16:28] T**
Crush the crows!
**[16:38] Gu**
Kill him!
**[16:40] Gu**
Kill that man!
**[16:49] Gu**
Takasugi-san!
**[17:15] T**
Move.
**[17:16] T**
There's someone that...
**[17:18] T**
...I have to greet before you.
**[17:21] T**
Move!
**[17:26] K**
I see.
**[17:27] K**
Then I will clear your path.
**[17:32] K**
Shake hands or punch each
other, whichever you want!
**[17:48] S**
Hey, stop egging them on!
**[17:52] S**
I'm the one who has to stop their fight!
**[17:55] K**
Then we should just join in!
**[17:58] S**
That's a great idea!
**[18:27] Gu**
Gintoki,
**[18:28] Gu**
I guess humans don't change that easily, huh?
**[18:33] Gu**
Even after dying,
**[18:35] Gu**
even after ten years,
**[18:37] Gu**
everybody's still just screwing around.
**[18:42] G**
I don't think so.
**[18:44] G**
Ten years ago, I would've killed you.
**[18:51] K**
I see.
**[18:52] K**
So you've learned to save
your fun for later, huh?
**[18:56] K**
You're all grown up.
**[18:59] G**
Shove it.
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo
Part 6
***SIGN*** Ten Years
**[21:19] (Flashback) ?**
So this is the end, huh?
**[21:21] (Flashback) ?**
I'd rather die like a samurai
**[21:24] (Flashback) ?**
than let the enemy kill me.
**[21:27] (Flashback) ?**
Let's commit seppuku.
**[21:30] (Flashback) ?**
Don't be stupid.
**[21:33] (Flashback) ?**
Stand up.
**[21:40] (Flashback) ?**
If you've got time to give
yourself a beautiful end,
**[21:43] (Flashback) ?**
then you might as well
live beautifully to the end!
**[21:54] (Flashback) ?**
Let's go, Zura.
**[21:56] (Flashback) Gu**
It's not Zura.
**[21:59] (Flashback) Gu**
It's Katsura.
**[22:01] G**
No, that's me.
**[22:03] G**
Forget "It's not Zura, it's Katsura."
**[22:04] G**
It's me.
**[22:07] (Flashback) S**
I see...
**[22:09] (Flashback) S**
I thought it would be an
interesting trip with you around.
**[22:13] (Flashback) G**
Sorry.
**[22:14] (Flashback) G**
I may not look it, but I like this planet.
**[22:18] (Flashback) G**
Go off to space and kick some butt.
**[22:21] (Flashback) G**
A tiny little inn doesn't suit you.
**[22:24] (Flashback) G**
Toss a big net into space,
**[22:26] (Flashback) G**
and go catch a star or something.
**[22:29] (Flashback) S**
So what will you do now?
**[22:32] (Flashback) G**
Me? Well...
**[22:35] (Flashback) G**
I'm gonna do some fishing here.
**[22:40] (Flashback) G**
I'll catch a shooting
star that fell to Earth,
**[22:43] (Flashback) G**
and then release it back into the sky.
**[22:46] G**
No, that was also me.
**[22:48] G**
That was after the Joi war ended.
**[22:49] G**
And that's definitely me.
**[22:57] (Flashback) Gu**
Gintoki, if I die...
**[23:02] (Flashback) Gu**
Take care of Sensei.
**[23:05] (Flashback) Gu**
I can only ask it of another
good-for-nothing like me.
**[23:09] (Flashback) G**
Then I'll ask another
good-for-nothing a favor, too.
**[23:13] (Flashback) G**
Don't die!
**[23:17] G**
Damn it, I told you, that was me!
**[23:19] G**
This episode had a badass ending,
**[23:22] G**
so why are you screwing with it now?
**[23:24] G**
I won't be able to keep up my
motivation 'til next week like this!
**[23:27] G**
I may not be here next week.
**[23:28] G**
You okay with that?
**[23:29] G**
Preview
**[23:30] G**
Wait!
**[23:31] G**
I'm not letting you get to the preview!
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:33] G**
You want to mess with people's heads
because it's getting serious, don't you?!
**[23:36] G**
Listen to me!
**[23:39] G**
So what I'm saying here is...
**[23:41] G**
"Don't die, buddy."
**[23:44] G**
I'm back from Hell!
**[23:46] G**
Go, for the things you truly
want to protect right now!
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo
Part 7
**[23:50] G**
I made my decision a long time ago.
***SIGN*** Paths
**[23:53] ---**
The four legendary Joi rebels
have gathered at last,
**[23:53] ---**
but will Gintoki even be there
ready for them next time?
**[23:57] ---**
Silliness aside, the Battle on Rakuyo arc
**[23:57] ---**
is nearing its climax! Don't miss it!
# 323 - Paths
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Tak**
I guess humans don't change that easily, huh?
**[00:09] Tak**
Even after dying,
**[00:11] Tak**
even after ten years,
**[00:13] Tak**
everybody's still just screwing around.
**[00:17] Gin**
I don't think so.
**[00:19] Gin**
Ten years ago, I would've killed you.
**[00:21] Kat**
I see.
**[00:23] Kat**
So you've learned to save
your fun for later, huh?
**[00:27] Kat**
You're all grown up.
**[00:29] Gin**
Shove it.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 7
***SIGN*** Paths
***SIGN*** Watch the Battle on Rakuyo arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[02:08] Tak**
It seems things changed
drastically while I was dead.
**[02:14] Tak**
The guys who were trying to defend the
country from me until just the other day
**[02:18] Tak**
are being targeted by it.
**[02:20] Gin**
Nothing's changed.
**[02:22] Gin**
Once we take them out,
it'll be your turn next,
**[02:25] Gin**
Takasugi.
**[02:26] Kat**
Until then, do the best
you can to stay alive.
**[02:31] Kat**
If you're still worth using at all, that is.
**[02:34] Tak**
Hey, what the hell are they saying?
**[02:38] Sak**
Translated simply, they're saying...
**[02:41] Sak**
"Don't die yet, buddy."
**[02:44] Sak**
"A lot has happened, but forget
all of it for now and play ni—"
**[02:47] Kat**
Who said anything of the sort?
This interpreter sucks!
**[02:50] Kat**
Bring us Toda Natsuko!
**[02:51] Gin**
When did we ever play nice with that moron?!
**[02:54] Gin**
I'll keep it nice and short,
so translate it properly this time.
**[02:57] Gin**
"F*ck you, man. Ptoo."
**[02:59] Sak**
Why'd you turn into a foreigner?
**[03:01] Sak**
Mr. Takasugi, he's basically sayin'...
**[03:05] Sak**
He wants to f*ck you.
**[03:07] Gin**
Don't translate that literally!
**[03:08] Gin**
Ow!
**[03:08] Kat**
Over here, Mr. Sakamoto.
**[03:10] Sak**
What the heck? Can't you just
talk to each other directly?
**[03:15] Kat**
Oh, sorry. I'd built up some phlegm.
**[03:19] Sak**
You just wanted to spit it
out? I'm not a spittoon!
**[03:22] Kat**
You don't need to interpret.
**[03:24] Kat**
Just spit some phlegm on him or something.
**[03:26] Sak**
Why couldn't you just spit on him directly?!
**[03:28] Sak**
Um, Mr. Takasugi...
**[03:30] Tak**
Tell him I'm sending that
phlegm right back at him.
**[03:33] Sak**
Send it right back at *him*, then!
**[03:35] Sak**
Don't use me as a middleman!
**[03:36] Sak**
I'm not a phlegm interpreter!
**[03:38] Sak**
Damn, this stinks!
**[03:39] Sak**
One of you has really stinky spit!
**[03:41] Gin**
Tell him he can't have any
phlegm when he just woke up.
**[03:42] Gin**
Hey, c'mon, stop—
**[03:44] Tak**
Tell him not to blame me, but the fool who
lives and breathes sugar all the time.
**[03:45] Tak**
Seriously, your phlegm reeks!
**[03:50] Kat**
Tell him I had ramen with extra
garlic but brushed my teeth.
**[03:51] Kat**
Ugh, that seriously stinks! Gross!
**[03:54] Sak**
Knock it off!
**[03:56] Sak**
They're the ones you need
to be spittin' at right now!
**[04:01] Tak**
So the students of the honorable
Shoka Sonjuku school
**[04:04] Tak**
are all enemies of the state now, huh?
**[04:06] Gin**
That's no state.
**[04:08] Gin**
That's nothing like a country.
**[04:15] U**
They thirst...
**[04:17] U**
The flesh and blood within me
that once made up that man.
**[04:22] U**
Are you happy or sad?
**[04:30] U**
Your students, who once
split up because of you,
**[04:33] U**
have now gathered again here for you...
**[04:37] U**
To be erased by you, Shoyo.
**[04:42] Hen**
They even built things like that?
**[04:45] Tak**
I see.
**[04:46] Tak**
So that monster crow has finally been
dragged down to a place I can reach him.
**[04:51] Kat**
Takasugi, you...
**[04:53] Kat**
You knew about Utsuro?
**[04:57] Tak**
Maybe, maybe not.
**[04:59] Tak**
But if anyone could capture a man
so strong and kill him easily,
**[05:06] Tak**
it'd have to be Sensei himself.
**[05:08] Tak**
No, it'd have to be something
else that was within him.
**[05:12] (Flashback) 304**
You ended up here after losing
your way, too, didn't you?
**[05:16] (Flashback) 304**
I am the same.
**[05:18] (Flashback) 304**
I'm still lost.
**[05:20] (Flashback) 304**
But that's all right.
**[05:22] (Flashback) 304**
Doubt yourself, lose your way,
**[05:24] (Flashback) 304**
and become the kind of
samurai you want to be.
**[05:28] Tak**
Sensei was fighting something...
**[05:31] Tak**
Most likely the something that was within him.
**[05:35] Tak**
But he lost,
**[05:37] Tak**
and only it remained.
**[05:40] Tak**
And it's still acting like it owns the world,
rebuilding countries as it pleases.
**[05:46] Tak**
In that case, I'll have to keep fighting, too.
**[05:50] Tak**
I don't care what you guys do from here on.
**[05:53] Tak**
My mind was made up a long time ago.
**[05:59] Tak**
I'll simply destroy this
rotten world he built!
**[06:10] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama!
**[06:16] Ban**
Like they'd stop now.
**[06:20] Ban**
Those men cannot be stopped anymore.
**[06:27] Tak**
Hold the crows off!
**[06:29] Gin**
We'll crush that junk!
**[06:37] Kat**
*That day,*
**[06:38] Kat**
*we all made countless graves.*
**[06:41] Kat**
*Not just for Sensei and our comrades,*
**[06:45] Kat**
*but also for ourselves.*
**[06:49] Kat**
* When Yoshida Shoyo died,*
* his students died with him.*
**[06:55] Kat**
* Their paths would never*
* again come together...*
**[06:58] Kat**
*Or so I thought.*
**[07:04] Kat**
*But, even as we walked down separate paths,*
**[07:07] Kat**
*we never strayed from Sensei's teachings.*
**[07:12] Kat**
* Seeking the kind of samurai*
* each of us wanted to be,*
**[07:16] Kat**
*we doubted ourselves and lost our way,*
**[07:17] Kat**
*but we never stopped walking,*
**[07:20] Kat**
*and that's why our paths converged once more.*
**[07:34] Kat**
*The one who brought them together*
**[07:36] Kat**
*was none other than Sensei.*
**[07:52] Kat**
*It might only be a fleeting chance meeting.*
**[08:15] Kat**
*But, even if it's only momentary,*
**[08:19] Kat**
* if we can go back to being Yoshida*
* Shoyo's students once more,*
**[08:23] Kat**
* if we can go back to*
* being just friends again,*
**[08:26] Kat**
*we couldn't ask for anything more.*
**[08:35] Tak**
How does it feel to be a liability
to a guy who just left a sickbed?
**[08:39] Gin**
And how does it feel to be forced to
rely on that liability to survive?
**[08:47] Gin**
It sucks.
**[08:55] G**
Impossible!
**[08:56] G**
They destroyed those weapons
all by themselves?
**[09:01] Mat**
Now's our chance!
**[09:05] Mat**
Fight them off!
**[09:07] Mat**
We're going back to Earth alive!
**[09:09] Hen**
We have those four on our side!
**[09:14] Sak**
Good grief.
**[09:15] Sak**
Don't put us on a pedestal
only when you need us.
**[09:19] Sak**
*But I have to apologize, everyone.*
**[09:22] Sak**
*I've started to feel it doesn't matter*
**[09:26] Sak**
*whether we win this battle or not.*
**[09:30] Sak**
* If I just cast aside thoughts of victory and*
* defeat, I can raise hell with those punks.*
**[09:37] Sak**
* If you knew I was havin'*
* pathetic thoughts like those,*
**[09:41] Sak**
* you probably wouldn't let me*
* stand by your side anymore.*
**[09:47] Gin**
Tatsuma!
**[09:49] Sak**
Comin'!
**[09:49] Sak**
Zura! Takasugi!
**[09:51] Sak**
Pretend to retreat and draw the enemy in!
**[09:54] Sak**
Gintoki!
**[09:56] Sak**
Use that chance to get past 'em!
**[10:01] Sak**
We didn't come all this way
just to help an old pal.
**[10:05] Sak**
Gintoki...
**[10:06] Sak**
Use your old pals to help
the new ones you've found
**[10:11] Sak**
who'll support our country's future!
**[10:14] Sak**
Your old friends will take
on the country of old.
**[10:18] Sak**
You lead your new friends to the new one.
**[10:21] Sak**
We'll be all right now.
**[10:24] Sak**
Go, for the people you truly
want to protect right now!
**[10:29] Tak**
Have you all lost your minds?
**[10:34] Tak**
Brat.
**[10:35] Tak**
I didn't save your life for that crap.
**[10:40] Tak**
Don't let anyone else take his head.
**[10:44] Tak**
246 wins, 246 losses,
**[10:47] Tak**
and one draw...
**[10:49] Tak**
Next time, the country
or whatever won't matter.
**[10:52] Tak**
I'll mop up everything else
**[10:53] Tak**
and come for his head alone.
**[10:56] Tak**
So, until then...
**[11:01] Tak**
...take care...
**[11:02] Tak**
...of our friend.
**[11:06] Shin**
Got it!
**[11:21] Sak**
*This is for the best.*
**[11:23] Sak**
*Even if we never meet again,*
**[11:27] Sak**
* we'll be friends who can stand by you with*
* our heads held high until the very last.*
**[11:36] U**
Prepare to land.
**[11:39] U**
It seems I have to correct
my students' failings myself.
**[11:43] U**
Sir.
**[11:44] O**
*Utsuro-sama.*
**[11:46] O**
I promise to bring you their heads.
**[11:53] O**
*I, Oboro, am also your student.*
**[11:57] O**
* Allow me to perform one*
* last act of loyalty for you.*
**[12:02] G**
Come in!
**[12:04] G**
This is the 9th Division!
**[12:05] G**
*Requesting immediate help!*
**[12:07] G**
* The enemy's counterattack has dealt great*
* damage to both the 9th and 10th Divisions!*
**[12:12] U**
Was it Umibozu?
**[12:14] G**
*Not just him.*
**[12:15] G**
*There could be someone else on the move.*
**[12:18] G**
* We've received word that our rear guard*
* has been attacked by an unknown unit!*
**[12:24] G**
*And, while we haven't confirmed it,*
**[12:25] G**
* we've also received word*
* that it was just one man.*
**[12:28] U**
Oh?
**[12:29] G**
*Anyway, send hel—*
**[12:35] Abu**
Hey.
**[12:41] Abu**
Where am I?
**[12:42] Abu**
Is this Hell?
**[12:44] Umi**
There's definitely a seat reserved
for me in Hell after all this,
**[12:48] Umi**
but I unfortunately still
have my legs and hair.
**[12:51] Abu**
Uh, you don't have any hair.
**[12:55] Abu**
It's only a matter of time.
**[12:57] Abu**
Our ride's almost here.
**[13:01] Umi**
If you've got time for
idle chatter, why not run?
**[13:06] Abu**
Umibozu, are you really here
to kill your stupid son?
**[13:13] Abu**
If you are, why would you protect us?
**[13:17] Abu**
What the hell did you come here to fight?
**[13:22] Umi**
Don't ask me.
**[13:24] Umi**
It's pathetic, right?
**[13:26] Umi**
Even if I can take out thousands
of enemies in front of me,
**[13:29] Umi**
I have no idea how to have
a proper father-son fight.
**[13:34] Umi**
The only way I know to show my love
and hatred is with this thing.
**[13:39] G**
Bring my weapon!
**[13:41] G**
Umibozu, the living legend.
**[13:44] G**
A worthy opponent indeed.
**[13:46] G**
I am the 1st Division commander who has
kept the Harusame going for a long time,
**[13:51] G**
the Beast King, Shirei!
**[13:52] G**
Can you take my attack...
**[14:03] Kam**
Pull yourself together, Commander.
**[14:07] Kam**
How could you mess up
receiving your own weapon?
**[14:10] Kam**
But don't worry.
**[14:12] Kam**
I'll finish your job for you.
**[14:16] Kam**
Umibozu, the living legend.
**[14:19] Kam**
A worthy opponent indeed.
**[14:21] Kam**
Replacing 1st Division Commander
Shirei as your opponent
**[14:25] Kam**
is the 7th Division commander,
**[14:28] Kam**
your stupid son.
**[14:47] G**
Y-You're...
**[14:50] G**
Kamui!
**[14:52] G**
Kill him!
**[14:58] Kam**
Didn't you hear me?
**[14:59] Kam**
I'm saying I'll take over
your commander's job!
**[15:08] Kam**
The enemy's over there.
**[15:10] Kam**
Now, charge.
**[15:24] Umi**
Don't throw things at people.
**[15:32] Umi**
Don't point sharp objects at people.
**[15:40] Umi**
I'm back from Hell
**[15:42] Umi**
to fight you,
**[15:45] Umi**
baldy!
**[15:48] Umi**
Don't call me baldy.
**[15:50] Umi**
Call me your cool-headed dad!
**[15:59] Abu**
Commander! Umibozu!
**[16:02] Abu**
Calm down!
**[16:03] Abu**
This is not the time!
**[16:17] Abu**
*It begins...*
**[16:26] Abu**
*The universe's worst father-son fight.*
**[16:34] Abu**
*Nobody can stop it now!*
**[16:43] (Flashback) Umi**
Kamui.
**[16:46] (Flashback) Umi**
Grow strong.
**[16:48] (Flashback) Umi**
And protect Mom and Kagura.
**[16:56] Kam**
*Look at me, Umibozu.*
**[16:59] Kam**
*I've grown strong.*
**[17:04] Kam**
* Ever since then, I've desperately*
* tried to follow in your footsteps.*
**[17:08] Kam**
* Ever since then, I've kept*
* fighting just to surpass you.*
**[17:13] Kam**
*Look at me, Umibozu.*
**[17:16] Kam**
*I've grown strong enough to kill you.*
**[17:24] Kam**
*So go back to being a beast once again!*
**[17:29] Kam**
*We're not father and son tied by blood here.*
**[17:34] Kam**
* We both want to prove we're*
* stronger than the other...*
**[17:38] Kam**
*We're just two male beasts!*
**[17:40] Kam**
*There isn't anyone who can stop us now...*
**[17:55] Kag**
No matter how many times you start this
nonsense, I'll stop you each time.
**[18:01] Kag**
Let's go back
**[18:03] Kag**
to being just family.
**[18:07] Shin**
Outta the way!
**[18:10] Shin**
Where are you, Kagura-chan?!
**[18:12] Shin**
If you're here, answer me!
**[18:15] Gin**
Pachi-boy.
**[18:16] Gin**
There's only one man who could pull
this crap against this many people.
**[18:22] Shin**
Umibozu-san...
**[18:24] Shin**
He really does want to protect Kamui-san
from the Harusame, not just stop him.
**[18:30] Gin**
I don't know.
**[18:31] Gin**
Whatever the old man wants,
**[18:33] Gin**
that stupid son won't stop anymore.
**[18:36] Gin**
If he's alive, he'll definitely
come for his head.
**[18:39] Gin**
And Kagura will definitely be there.
**[18:42] Gin**
Let's hurry.
**[18:43] Gin**
The Harusame's troops are
starting to withdraw now.
**[18:46] Gin**
That family of monsters are the last
ones I expect to go down easily,
**[18:50] Gin**
but the Harusame would never
ignore them and retreat.
**[18:56] Gin**
I've got a bad feeling about this.
**[19:00] Kag**
Lower your fists, both of you.
**[19:03] Kag**
It's still not too late.
**[19:06] Kag**
We can still go back.
**[19:09] Umi**
Kagura.
**[19:10] Kam**
No, it is too late.
**[19:18] Umi**
Kagura!
**[19:22] Kam**
Your family doesn't exist anymore!
**[19:26] Kam**
The older brother you knew
doesn't exist anymore!
**[19:30] Kam**
The father you know won't exist soon, either.
**[19:33] Kam**
I thank you, sister of mine.
**[19:36] Kam**
If his daughter dies in front of his eyes,
**[19:38] Kam**
that beast may awaken once more!
**[19:41] Umi**
Kamui!
**[19:47] Kag**
The kid sister you knew doesn't
exist anymore, either.
**[19:55] Kag**
You're the only one who
hasn't changed, Kamui.
**[20:00] Kag**
You haven't grown strong at all!
**[20:07] Kag**
You're the same sniveling guy
you were when Daddy left us.
**[20:11] Kag**
The same guy who put on a
brave face in front of Mommy.
**[20:16] Kag**
Nothing's changed at all.
**[20:19] Kag**
Mommy and everybody else left you behind,
**[20:24] Kag**
so you're sniveling and
putting on a brave face.
**[20:26] Kag**
You're the same old crybaby brother of mine.
**[20:34] Kag**
You stupid brother!
**[20:36] Kag**
I'm no longer the sister you knew, who
only shed tears with you by your side!
**[20:42] Kag**
I can now stand shoulder-to-shoulder,
fight, and shed blood with you!
**[20:50] Kag**
So...
**[20:52] Kag**
Come back to us, Kamui!
**[20:56] Kag**
It's not that baldy old man you should
be raising your fists against!
**[21:01] Kag**
You should be pointing them somewhere else!
**[21:07] Kag**
I'll fight with you, so...
**[21:12] Umi**
Stop...
**[21:16] Umi**
Stop it...
**[21:19] Umi**
That's enough.
**[21:20] Umi**
Please, just stop!
**[21:23] Abu**
Umibozu...
**[21:34] Abu**
Umibozu!
**[21:53] Kag**
Daddy!
**[22:00] Kag**
Daddy!
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 8
**[23:49] Umi**
I'm talking about the woman
I risked my life to court.
***SIGN*** Master of Kouan
***SIGN*** The mysterious babe who makes a cameo in the OP.
***SIGN*** Her identity will be revealed next week...
***SIGN*** Actually, it feels like the ED's totally spoiled it already,
***SIGN*** but we'll do our best to pretend nobody's noticed.
# 324 - Master of Kouan
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:06] (Flashback) Ub**
"The strongest man in the universe."
**[00:08] (Flashback) Ub**
The people who call me that
are but frogs in the well.
**[00:13] (Flashback) Ub**
The universe is a big place.
**[00:15] (Flashback) Ub**
A planet is no more than one of
innumerable specks of sand within it,
**[00:19] (Flashback) Ub**
and the world one can see in a lifetime
is no more than a tiny part of the whole.
**[00:24] (Flashback) M**
You mean to say there are
many more stronger than you?
**[00:27] (Flashback) M**
But you must've been the strongest
man in the world my father saw.
**[00:32] (Flashback) M**
Otherwise, he...
**[00:33] (Flashback) M**
The captain of the Chidori Space Pirates
wouldn't entrust his dear daughter to you,
**[00:38] (Flashback) M**
Umibozu.
**[00:40] (Flashback) M**
Or should I say, my father's
old friend, Kanko?
**[00:44] (Flashback) M**
You needn't say a thing.
**[00:46] (Flashback) M**
I, Mutsu, shall withdraw our request myself.
**[00:50] (Flashback) M**
You are far too great a man to
be teaching someone like me.
**[00:53] (Flashback) M**
But, whenever you feel like it,
**[00:55] (Flashback) M**
would you come chat with this
ignorant, sheltered bird in a cage?
**[01:02] (Flashback) M**
And tell me about the innumerable specks
of sand you have seen with your eyes?
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 8
***SIGN*** Master of Kouan
***SIGN*** Watch the Battle on Rakuyo arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[02:45] U**
I sensed from the start that
things between you and me
**[02:48] U**
would eventually come to this point.
**[02:52] U**
And, having met you, I think
I have found my answer...
**[02:55] U**
As to why, despite building an
advanced interstellar civilization,
**[02:59] U**
we still don't stop fighting.
**[03:03] U**
It has nothing to do with
standpoints, views, or creeds.
**[03:08] U**
It comes from our fundamental
nature as creatures.
**[03:11] U**
No matter how far we evolve,
**[03:14] U**
our psyche may always force us to determine
**[03:16] U**
which of us are predators,
and which of us are prey.
**[03:21] U**
And when it comes to two creatures
at the top of the food chain...
**[03:27] Ub**
The strongest man in the universe?
**[03:29] Ub**
Are you one of those fools who
keep talking about that crap, too?
**[03:33] Ub**
Well, I'm sorry, but I have
no interest in that title.
**[03:37] Ub**
Begone!
**[03:39] Ub**
I don't care what happens to the world.
**[03:41] Ub**
Even if I am a frog,
**[03:43] Ub**
I will protect the well I live in,
even if it kills me.
**[03:49] Ub**
I'm fine with being just a frog.
**[03:52] U**
You are no frog in the well.
**[03:56] U**
As someone who has seen the rise and
fall of many a species, I guarantee it.
**[04:02] U**
But that's exactly why I know that,
**[04:04] U**
even if you are a
once-in-a-millennium warrior,
**[04:09] U**
you cannot escape the principles of life.
**[04:12] U**
Indeed, you will inevitably fall someday.
**[04:17] U**
Because I *have* escaped
the principles of life,
**[04:20] U**
and you ended up standing in my way.
**[04:26] Sak**
Mutsu! Hurry!
**[04:32] (Flashback) UB**
Someone stronger than me?
**[04:34] (Flashback) M**
Yes.
**[04:35] (Flashback) M**
If you say that even you can't
be called the strongest,
**[04:38] (Flashback) M**
have you met anyone worthy of the title?
**[04:41] (Flashback) UB**
Hosen, whom I fought when I was
younger, was pretty strong.
**[04:44] (Flashback) UB**
But that's only if we're talking
about creatures like us.
**[04:49] (Flashback) UB**
The things I've fought in my life as a hunter
**[04:51] (Flashback) UB**
were all beyond comparable
concepts such as strength.
**[04:54] (Flashback) UB**
Could you compare anyone's strength
to that of a typhoon or tsunami?
**[04:57] (Flashback) M**
There's no need to.
**[04:59] (Flashback) M**
Nobody else could stop a natural
disaster by themselves.
**[05:06] (Flashback) M**
I've heard of it, you know.
**[05:07] (Flashback) M**
How you earned the title of "strongest."
**[05:11] (Flashback) M**
The reason Yato hail you as a hero.
**[05:15] (Flashback) M**
About the battle in which
Umibozu took back our home.
**[05:20] (Flashback) M**
The Yato's home planet, Kouan,
**[05:22] (Flashback) M**
suffered an all-out attack by the
Allied Planets during the Great War
**[05:25] (Flashback) M**
and was destroyed along with many Yato.
**[05:30] (Flashback) M**
Altana began to gush out of the ground,
**[05:33] (Flashback) M**
and the ruined planet became
a nest for mutant creatures.
**[05:40] (Flashback) M**
Among them was something that made
people call Kouan the planet of death...
**[05:48] (Flashback) M**
The planetary parasite Orochi,
considered the Master of Kouan.
**[05:52] (Flashback) M**
It fed on the Altana
reserves, grew 108 heads,
**[05:56] (Flashback) M**
and eliminated anyone who
dared approach its nest.
**[06:00] (Flashback) M**
Everyone abandoned the place
**[06:01] (Flashback) M**
and didn't approach it for centuries,
but one man charged into its nest alone
**[06:05] (Flashback) M**
and took back the Yato's home...
**[06:08] (Flashback) M**
That was you, Umibozu, was it not?
**[06:12] (Flashback) UB**
Took back our home?
**[06:15] (Flashback) UB**
I just lost a bet with a friend.
**[06:18] (Flashback) UB**
I said I'd go to our deserted home and hit
on a woman if I lost a drinking battle.
**[06:27] (Flashback) UB**
I'd never experienced
anything like it before.
**[06:30] (Flashback) UB**
The moment I saw them,
**[06:34] (Flashback) UB**
it stood up.
**[06:38] (Flashback) M**
Stood up?
**[06:39] (Flashback) M**
What did?
**[06:40] (Flashback) UB**
I guess it was too early for you, kid.
**[06:42] (Flashback) UB**
Well, you could call it my instinct.
**[06:45] (Flashback) UB**
The moment I laid eyes on them,
**[06:46] (Flashback) UB**
my genes immediately came to a conclusion.
**[06:49] (Flashback) UB**
"You're going to die."
**[06:51] (Flashback) UB**
"Hurry up and make some babies," they said.
**[07:00] (Flashback) UB**
I went after them again and again,
but I just couldn't break through.
**[07:05] (Flashback) UB**
It felt like I was fighting
the earth I stood on.
**[07:09] (Flashback) UB**
Like I was a mere insect
going up against a planet.
**[07:14] (Flashback) M**
Your genes admitted defeat before you did?
**[07:17] (Flashback) UB**
Simply put, I felt fear for
the first time in my life.
**[07:22] (Flashback) UB**
But, as much as his genes
may cry out in terror,
**[07:25] (Flashback) UB**
a man cannot cry until his battle is over.
**[07:28] (Flashback) UB**
So I told my right ball...
**[07:31] UB**
Quit rattling.
**[07:33] UB**
*Lefty, you shut up and watch, too.*
**[07:35] UB**
*I planted my seeds a long time ago.*
**[07:38] UB**
*My best ones, in fact.*
**[07:40] UB**
*So let me fight! Let me protect my family!*
**[08:00] (Flashback) M**
I don't believe it.
**[08:02] (Flashback) M**
You suppressed your instincts by force?
**[08:06] (Flashback) UB**
Thanks to that, my worldly desires died down,
**[08:08] (Flashback) UB**
and I could hit on the
woman with a clear mind.
**[08:10] (Flashback) M**
The woman?
**[08:11] (Flashback) M**
Was the Orochi female?
**[08:13] (Flashback) UB**
What are you talking about?
**[08:15] (Flashback) UB**
Why would I crush one of my balls
to fight a scrub like that?
**[08:20] UB**
Is that arm regenerating?
**[08:23] (Flashback) UB**
Like I said,
**[08:24] (Flashback) UB**
I was on that planet to hit on a woman.
**[08:27] UB**
I see.
**[08:29] UB**
I knew it...
**[08:31] UB**
You really are just like her.
A being of Altana...
**[08:34] (Flashback) M**
Who are you talking about?
**[08:34] U**
Who are you talking about?
**[08:46] UB**
I'm talking about the woman
I risked my life to court.
**[09:06] (Flashback) UB**
On the Yato's home planet, which had
fallen to ruin a long time ago,
**[09:09] (Flashback) UB**
on the planet of death...
**[09:13] (Flashback) UB**
There stood a woman.
**[09:29] (Flashback) UB**
And I, too, stood tall.
**[09:34] (Flashback) UB**
I can't believe there
really was someone here.
**[09:39] (Flashback) UB**
Hey, wait!
**[09:41] (Flashback) Ko**
This planet isn't dead or anything.
**[09:44] (Flashback) Ko**
It may have become uninhabitable for people,
**[09:46] (Flashback) Ko**
but these guys still live here,
eating the rotten earth,
**[09:49] (Flashback) Ko**
those guys still live here,
drinking the rotten water,
**[09:53] (Flashback) Ko**
and I still live here.
**[09:55] (Flashback) Ko**
All that happened was that one species
among many on this planet died out.
**[10:00] (Flashback) Ko**
You shouldn't judge an entire
planet by your standards alone.
**[10:04] (Flashback) Ko**
Leave.
**[10:06] (Flashback) Ko**
I don't want to erase another life
from this planet to save an intruder.
**[10:11] (Flashback) Ko**
I must put them to sleep.
**[10:14] (Flashback) UB**
That's when I learned
**[10:17] (Flashback) UB**
that "Master of Kouan"
**[10:22] (Flashback) UB**
referred to that woman.
**[10:25] (Flashback) UB**
Hey, wai—
**[10:36] (Flashback) UB**
I said wait!
**[10:40] (Flashback) UB**
Out of my way!
**[10:45] (Flashback) UB**
Listen to me!
**[10:51] (Flashback) UB**
"That woman is dangerous."
**[10:53] (Flashback) UB**
That's what my instincts told me.
**[10:55] (Flashback) UB**
But, at the same time, they
were also telling me this...
**[10:58] (Flashback) UB**
H-Hey, lady.
**[11:01] (Flashback) UB**
If you don't mind, why don't
we forget about this Orochi
**[11:03] (Flashback) UB**
and go take out the Orochi in my pants?
**[11:09] (Flashback) UB**
"She is the one."
**[11:12] (Flashback) UB**
For three days and three nights, she kept
fighting to put the Orochi to sleep.
**[11:17] (Flashback) UB**
And I kept trying to woo her in order
to put the Orochi in my pants to sleep.
**[11:25] (Flashback) UB**
Why don't we go get some coffee?
**[11:28] (Flashback) UB**
But she paid no heed to me at all.
**[11:38] (Flashback) UB**
Just as she took out the 59th head
and the Orochi began to retreat,
**[11:47] (Flashback) UB**
I suppressed my last Orochi, too.
**[11:51] (Flashback) UB**
There was something I wanted to tell her not
out of instinct, but with my own words.
**[11:56] (Flashback) UB**
My name is Kanko.
**[11:59] (Flashback) UB**
I'll ask your name next
time I'm here or something.
**[12:02] (Flashback) UB**
If the Master of Kouan will
let me come here, that is.
**[12:06] (Flashback) Ko**
Did you tag along all this
while just to say that?
**[12:10] (Flashback) UB**
When you visit someone else's home,
**[12:12] (Flashback) UB**
it's common courtesy to first knock
on their door and introduce yourself.
**[12:15] (Flashback) UB**
Sorry for causing a fuss.
**[12:17] (Flashback) UB**
Tell your family I apologize, Master.
**[12:23] (Flashback) Ko**
This isn't someone else's home.
**[12:25] (Flashback) Ko**
It's your homeland.
**[12:27] (Flashback) Ko**
If you want to come back, feel free.
**[12:30] (Flashback) Ko**
Though, as far as I know,
**[12:32] (Flashback) Ko**
you're the only weirdo who's ever come
back here, let alone knocked on the door.
**[12:39] (Flashback) Ko**
The Orochi wasn't trying to get rid of you.
**[12:42] (Flashback) Ko**
It just got excited and wanted to play.
**[12:45] (Flashback) Ko**
We thought everyone had
forgotten this planet,
**[12:47] (Flashback) Ko**
but there was someone out
there who remembered us.
**[12:50] (Flashback) Ko**
Maybe that made it happy.
**[12:53] (Flashback) Ko**
Also, I'm not the Master of Kouan.
**[12:57] (Flashback) Ko**
I'm Kouka.
**[13:00] (Flashback) UB**
After that, I began going home regularly.
**[13:04] (Flashback) UB**
At some point, the Orochi
stopped attacking me.
**[13:10] (Flashback) Ko**
Maybe it accepted you as part of this planet,
**[13:14] (Flashback) Ko**
or maybe it accepted you as its new master.
**[13:17] (Flashback) Ko**
You might actually be suited to the role.
**[13:20] (Flashback) UB**
There's nothing good to eat.
**[13:22] (Flashback) UB**
All you can find here is
rotten earth and water.
**[13:25] (Flashback) UB**
I wouldn't even last ten days here.
**[13:27] (Flashback) UB**
Kouka, why do you stay here?
**[13:30] (Flashback) Ko**
I'm the same as you all.
**[13:36] (Flashback) Ko**
You abandoned the planet because
you couldn't live here anymore.
**[13:41] (Flashback) Ko**
I can't live anywhere but here.
**[13:44] (Flashback) Ko**
That's why I remain.
**[13:46] (Flashback) Ko**
The few Yato who survived the Great
War scattered to other planets.
**[13:52] (Flashback) Ko**
But there were some who chose
to die with their home.
**[13:57] (Flashback) Ko**
Most of them died sooner than
they normally would have.
**[14:01] (Flashback) Ko**
However, some among them could
adapt to this harsh environment.
**[14:06] (Flashback) Ko**
I am a descendant of that admirable clan,
**[14:09] (Flashback) Ko**
its sole survivor.
**[14:11] (Flashback) Ko**
If it came down to it, I could even
eat your stinky boots to survive.
**[14:16] (Flashback) Ko**
I'd rather die, though.
**[14:18] (Flashback) UB**
If you don't have any family or friends here,
**[14:21] (Flashback) UB**
you don't have a reason to live
alone here, eating boots to survive.
**[14:25] (Flashback) Ko**
But I don't have a reason
to leave, either, do I?
**[14:28] (Flashback) UB**
Any other place would be
heaven compared to this.
**[14:31] (Flashback) UB**
Besides,
**[14:33] (Flashback) UB**
aren't you lonely?
**[14:35] (Flashback) Ko**
Lonely?
**[14:37] (Flashback) Ko**
The thought never crossed my mind.
**[14:39] (Flashback) Ko**
Could something like that
be a reason to leave?
**[14:44] (Flashback) Ko**
Even if it could,
**[14:45] (Flashback) Ko**
I forgot a long time ago when you're
supposed to feel that emotion.
**[14:51] (Flashback) Ko**
I was born and raised on this planet.
**[14:54] (Flashback) Ko**
No baby hates the cradle it slept in, right?
**[14:59] (Flashback) Ko**
I don't know how you see it,
**[15:01] (Flashback) Ko**
but I quite enjoy this life, where I get
to hog an entire planet and do as I please.
**[15:08] (Flashback) Ko**
Also, it's not like I can't have fun here.
**[15:11] (Flashback) Ko**
I can read all the books on the planet,
**[15:13] (Flashback) Ko**
sing at the top of my lungs
without worrying about anyone,
**[15:17] (Flashback) Ko**
and toy with the occasional
invader that shows up.
**[15:24] (Flashback) UB**
I always told her stories about
all the planets I'd visited.
**[15:29] (Flashback) UB**
I thought she'd find them interesting
because she'd never set foot off of Kouan.
**[15:35] (Flashback) UB**
And she always listened to me
with a bored look on her face.
**[15:48] (Flashback) UB**
But then, one day...
**[15:50] (Flashback) Ko**
Kanko.
**[15:52] (Flashback) Ko**
Enough.
**[15:54] (Flashback) Ko**
I've grown sick of listening.
**[15:58] (Flashback) Ko**
I want to see another
planet with my own eyes.
**[16:01] (Flashback) UB**
B-But you...
**[16:04] (Flashback) Ko**
I don't mind if it's from afar.
**[16:07] (Flashback) Ko**
Would you take me?
**[16:12] (Flashback) UB**
She gazed at it without saying a word,
**[16:15] (Flashback) UB**
wearing the same bored expression as always.
**[16:18] (Flashback) UB**
But she gazed at it intently,
without budging an inch.
**[16:22] (Flashback) UB**
Is it pretty?
**[16:24] (Flashback) UB**
That's what most planets
people live on look like.
**[16:28] (Flashback) UB**
Have you heard of Earth?
**[16:29] (Flashback) Ko**
Earth?
**[16:31] (Flashback) UB**
Apparently, it's a remote planet
that's still developing,
**[16:34] (Flashback) UB**
but it's blessed with clear
water and fertile land,
**[16:37] (Flashback) UB**
and is said to be very beautiful.
**[16:41] (Flashback) UB**
Would you like to go see Earth with me?
**[16:47] (Flashback) UB**
No, not just Earth.
**[16:49] (Flashback) UB**
If there's anywhere you want to go,
**[16:51] (Flashback) UB**
the great Umibozu will bring you away
from that rotten planet and take you.
**[16:56] (Flashback) UB**
So, be my... m-my...
**[17:02] (Flashback) UB**
Be my, uh, partner!
**[17:05] (Flashback) UB**
Y-Yeah! My business partner!
**[17:07] (Flashback) UB**
If we teamed up, we could be the
strongest alien hunters ever!
**[17:10] (Flashback) UB**
Don't you agree?
**[17:12] (Flashback) Ko**
Partner, huh?
**[17:14] (Flashback) Ko**
That doesn't sound bad.
**[17:16] (Flashback) Ko**
If that were possible,
**[17:20] (Flashback) Ko**
I bet it'd be really fun.
**[17:26] (Flashback) UB**
That day...
**[17:27] (Flashback) UB**
Even though she never used to see me off,
**[17:30] (Flashback) UB**
she didn't take her eyes
off my ship as it flew off.
**[17:54] (Flashback) UB**
It didn't hit me until then.
**[17:56] (Flashback) UB**
The reason she never used to see me off.
**[18:00] (Flashback) UB**
The reason she saw me off that day.
**[18:03] (Flashback) UB**
I spent twelve whole days looking everywhere,
**[18:05] (Flashback) UB**
but I couldn't find her.
**[18:15] (Flashback) UB**
That's when I saw the
Orochi standing silently.
**[18:25] (Flashback) Ko**
This is a problem.
**[18:28] (Flashback) Ko**
When did you tame the Orochi to this extent?
**[18:34] (Flashback) Ko**
I wasn't going to see you anymore.
**[18:37] (Flashback) Ko**
Why'd you come here?
**[18:40] (Flashback) Ko**
Didn't I tell you that I belong to the
clan that would die with this planet?
**[18:46] (Flashback) Ko**
I've lived all my life by myself.
**[18:48] (Flashback) Ko**
I have to live by myself.
**[18:53] (Flashback) Ko**
So why?
**[18:57] (Flashback) Ko**
Why do you remind me of these feelings?
**[19:03] (Flashback) UB**
I'm sorry, Kouka.
**[19:05] (Flashback) UB**
But I'm the same as you.
**[19:08] (Flashback) UB**
Even if I'm on a planet bustling with life,
**[19:11] (Flashback) UB**
even if I have thousands of people around me,
**[19:15] (Flashback) UB**
I still feel lonely without you by my side.
**[19:25] (Flashback) UB**
I don't want to let you die alone.
**[19:28] (Flashback) UB**
If you want to stay here, then so will I.
**[19:33] (Flashback) UB**
If you want to go somewhere else,
**[19:35] (Flashback) UB**
I'll go anywhere with you.
**[19:38] (Flashback) UB**
So...
**[19:39] (Flashback) UB**
Die with me, Kouka.
**[19:46] (Flashback) Ko**
I'm betraying my clan.
**[19:51] (Flashback) Ko**
I feel like the planet's asking me
if I'm going to abandon it, too.
**[19:59] (Flashback) UB**
Really?
**[20:11] (Flashback) UB**
If you ask me,
**[20:13] (Flashback) UB**
it looks like it's thanking you.
**[20:17] (Flashback) UB**
Like it's saying, "thanks for everything."
**[20:29] (Flashback) M**
I see.
**[20:30] (Flashback) M**
Legend calls you a hero who took the Yato
home from the monstrous "Master of Kouan,"
**[20:37] (Flashback) M**
but you were actually a Casanova who wooed
her and took her from the dying planet?
**[20:44] (Flashback) UB**
Legend, my foot.
**[20:47] (Flashback) UB**
The strongest creature the
great Umibozu ever encountered
**[20:51] (Flashback) UB**
can be found all over the universe...
**[20:54] (Flashback) UB**
A wife.
**[20:56] (Flashback) UB**
And I, just like every other
pitiful man in the universe,
**[20:59] (Flashback) UB**
ended up under my wife's thumb, basically.
**[21:03] (Flashback) M**
That's hilarious.
**[21:05] (Flashback) M**
The strongest man in the universe
was the weakest in his household?
**[21:09] (Flashback) UB**
Don't laugh.
**[21:11] (Flashback) UB**
A household is a whole other universe.
**[21:14] (Flashback) M**
But it's a fine legend.
**[21:16] (Flashback) M**
Rather than stories about lonesome
monsters dying all alone,
**[21:20] (Flashback) M**
I prefer ordinary stories about finding
companionship, parenthood, and a family.
**[21:31] (Flashback) UB**
You can say that again.
**[21:33] (Flashback) UB**
Building a legend of being
the strongest means nothing.
**[21:36] (Flashback) UB**
Building such ordinary happiness
is far more valuable.
**[21:43] (Flashback) UB**
I knew nothing back then.
**[21:48] (Flashback) UB**
I can't live anywhere but this planet.
**[21:52] (Flashback) UB**
Not even what her words truly meant.
**[21:56] (Flashback) UB**
I'm neither a hero nor a father.
**[22:01] Kam**
He's a murderer.
**[22:03] Kam**
That man killed our mother.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:44] UB**
I'll take care of Mom's illness somehow.
**[23:46] Ko**
Good grief. He inherited all your stupidity.
**[23:49] Kam**
Take us away.
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 9
**[23:51] Kam**
Take Mom and me away from this planet.
***SIGN*** The Lost Rabbit
***SIGN*** To protect his family, the young Kamui sought something.
***SIGN*** His earnest desire grows twisted with time...
***SIGN*** Can the bald old man reform his stupid son?
***SIGN*** And how will his fight with the monster that barged in end?
# 325 - The Lost Rabbit
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:06] Kam**
Our mother was a mutant created by the
outpouring of Altana on Planet Kouan...
**[00:13] Kam**
An immortal who never would've died
so long as she'd stayed on that planet.
**[00:18] Kam**
There's no telling just how long
she'd lived there all by herself.
**[00:26] Kam**
But one thing's for sure:
**[00:28] Kam**
that man made that solitary
flower wither and die.
**[00:33] Kam**
What killed our mother
**[00:36] Kam**
was our father.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 9
***SIGN*** The Lost Rabbit
***SIGN*** Watch the Battle on Rakuyo arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[02:21] (Flashback) Kam**
Don't ever mouth off at me again.
**[02:23] (Flashback) Kam**
If you do, you won't get off this lightly.
**[02:25] (Flashback) G**
We'll say it as many times as it takes!
**[02:27] (Flashback) G**
Get out of this town already!
**[02:29] (Flashback) UB**
Hey!
**[02:30] (Flashback) UB**
What are you guys doing?!
**[02:32] (Flashback) G**
Crap, it's Umibozu!
**[02:34] (Flashback) G**
Run away!
**[02:35] (Flashback) Kam**
Dad!
**[02:37] (Flashback) UB**
Don't bully the weak!
**[02:41] (Flashback) Kam**
It was eight-on-one.
**[02:43] (Flashback) Kam**
I was the one being bullied.
**[02:45] (Flashback) UB**
Eight ants can't bully an elephant.
**[02:47] (Flashback) UB**
Don't use the Yato's inherent
strength for no reason.
**[02:49] (Flashback) Kam**
You told me to grow stronger.
**[02:51] (Flashback) UB**
What kind of brother gets his dear
kid sister mixed up in a fight?
**[02:55] (Flashback) UB**
Right, Kagura-chan?
**[02:58] (Flashback) UB**
I was wrong! There were two elephants!
**[03:01] (Flashback) Kam**
But those guys called Mom a pathogen,
even though they don't know anything.
**[03:08] (Flashback) Kam**
Dad, just what is Mom's illness?
**[03:11] (Flashback) Kam**
Will she really get better?
**[03:13] (Flashback) Kam**
Is there nothing I can do to help?
**[03:18] (Flashback) UB**
Don't worry.
**[03:19] (Flashback) UB**
Do you have any idea how much you're
helping just by staying by her side?
**[03:23] (Flashback) UB**
I'll take care of Mom's illness.
**[03:26] (Flashback) UB**
So stop being reckless.
**[03:30] Kam**
I felt like I wasn't being taken seriously.
**[03:34] Kam**
And I thought Mom's illness wasn't healing,
**[03:36] Kam**
and that he stopped coming home frequently,
**[03:39] Kam**
because I lacked strength.
**[03:43] (Flashback) UB**
Grow stronger.
**[03:46] Kam**
So I tried to get stronger.
**[04:01] (Flashback) Ko**
Kamui, you got into another
fight, didn't you?
**[04:03] (Flashback) Kam**
N-No, I didn't!
**[04:04] (Flashback) Ko**
You're starting to resemble him.
**[04:06] (Flashback) Ko**
You suck at lying.
**[04:08] (Flashback) Ko**
Keep doing that, and you'll go bald.
**[04:09] (Flashback) Kam**
As if!
**[04:10] (Flashback) Ko**
Come here.
**[04:12] (Flashback) Kam**
N-No.
**[04:13] (Flashback) Ko**
Oh, so there is something you didn't inherit.
**[04:15] (Flashback) Ko**
The baldy has no problem being
babied when he needs it.
**[04:19] (Flashback) Kag**
How nice.
**[04:20] (Flashback) Kag**
Me, too!
**[04:22] (Flashback) Ko**
It's big bro's turn today.
**[04:24] (Flashback) Ko**
Good grief. You inherited all his stupidity.
**[04:30] (Flashback) Ko**
I'm so sorry...
**[04:32] (Flashback) Ko**
For making you bear so many
burdens on this tiny back.
**[04:36] (Flashback) Ko**
I became one with him because
I wanted to be by his side.
**[04:42] (Flashback) Ko**
I wanted to be by your side
after you were born.
**[04:47] (Flashback) Ko**
So, Kamui,
**[04:49] (Flashback) Ko**
you two stay the way you are.
**[04:55] Kam**
I started to understand even
less what it meant to be strong.
**[04:59] (Flashback) G**
Those guys...
**[05:00] (Flashback) G**
It's the Harusame.
**[05:04] (Flashback) G**
Here comes our sandbag.
**[05:09] (Flashback) Kam**
Kagura!
**[05:10] (Flashback) Kam**
Don't bully Kamui!
**[05:12] (Flashback) Kam**
We promised Mommy we wouldn't
make her worry anymore!
**[05:15] (Flashback) Kam**
We promised we'd always be together!
**[05:18] (Flashback) G**
Shut up, runt!
**[05:21] (Flashback) Kam**
Kagura!
**[05:28] (Flashback) Abu**
People on this planet don't teach
their punk kids too well, huh?
**[05:33] (Flashback) Abu**
I had to teach them a lesson.
**[05:36] (Flashback) Abu**
Hey, baby rabbit.
**[05:37] (Flashback) Abu**
If you don't want to end up a villain,
**[05:39] (Flashback) Abu**
learn to protect your little sister.
**[05:44] (Flashback) G**
What are you doing, Abuto?
**[05:47] (Flashback) Abu**
Nothing.
**[05:48] (Flashback) Abu**
I tried to take an outdoor dump, but
the place was already filled with shit.
**[05:59] (Flashback) UB**
I thought I told you...
**[06:01] (Flashback) UB**
Strength is undone by strength.
**[06:04] (Flashback) UB**
You're confused about
what strength truly means.
**[06:07] (Flashback) Kam**
I don't get it.
**[06:10] (Flashback) Kam**
What is strength?
**[06:12] (Flashback) Kam**
Letting others beat you up?
**[06:14] (Flashback) Kam**
Hurting others to protect your family?
**[06:18] (Flashback) Kam**
Going off to fight alone, with
no concern for your family?
**[06:24] (Flashback) Kam**
I just don't get it anymore.
**[06:34] (Flashback) UB**
I don't get it, either.
**[06:38] (Flashback) Ko**
But you're still going?
**[06:41] (Flashback) UB**
That's right, Kouka.
**[06:43] (Flashback) UB**
Just as you risked your life in the
hopes that you could be with us,
**[06:48] (Flashback) UB**
I'll keep you alive, even if I
have to leave you all to do it.
**[06:54] (Flashback) UB**
Even if I lose the right to call myself
a father, I'll protect my family.
**[06:59] (Flashback) UB**
As the man who made the flower blooming
on the planet of death wither,
**[07:04] (Flashback) UB**
that is my cross to bear.
**[07:07] U**
What a vast universe we live in.
**[07:10] U**
I'm amazed that there was
a being just like me,
**[07:12] U**
and others who watched her die.
**[07:17] U**
What expression was she wearing?
**[07:20] U**
One of relief as her times of
emptiness came to an end?
**[07:23] U**
One of hatred as her loved ones murdered her?
**[07:28] (Flashback) Kam**
Why?
**[07:31] (Flashback) Kam**
Why did you fall in love with Mom?
**[07:34] (Flashback) Kam**
If you hadn't brought her
off of that planet...
**[07:37] (Flashback) Kam**
You're the one who's making her suffer.
**[07:40] (Flashback) UB**
That's exactly right.
**[07:43] (Flashback) UB**
She was all alone, and
I couldn't ignore that.
**[07:46] (Flashback) UB**
I wanted to protect her.
**[07:48] (Flashback) UB**
But I was the one being protected.
**[07:52] (Flashback) UB**
I can't live on that planet.
**[07:54] (Flashback) UB**
But Mom can't live on any other planet.
**[07:59] (Flashback) UB**
That's why she came along
without saying anything.
**[08:01] (Flashback) UB**
Instead of living forever alone,
**[08:04] (Flashback) UB**
she chose to live with us and die.
**[08:08] (Flashback) UB**
Blame me if you must.
**[08:11] (Flashback) UB**
But even if I had realized back then,
**[08:15] (Flashback) UB**
I still would've chosen
to walk down this path.
**[08:19] (Flashback) UB**
Because it brought you two into my life.
**[08:26] Kam**
The footsteps I'd always tried to
follow in kept walking farther away.
**[08:30] Kam**
The ones making Mom suffer
**[08:33] Kam**
were the three of us, her family.
**[08:37] (Flashback) G**
That's him. Let's do this.
**[08:45] (Flashback) Kam**
Hey.
**[08:52] (Flashback) Abu**
Those aren't the eyes of a brother
who came to avenge his kid sister.
**[08:57] (Flashback) Abu**
You might have the potential to become
a much bigger villain than these guys.
**[09:00] (Flashback) Kam**
I don't care...
**[09:02] (Flashback) Kam**
As long as I can grow stronger!
**[09:06] (Flashback) Abu**
Hey, what's this about?
**[09:08] (Flashback) Abu**
Are you really here for lessons
in how to be a villain?
**[09:11] (Flashback) G**
Get a load of Abuto.
**[09:13] (Flashback) Abu**
It's no laughing matter.
**[09:14] (Flashback) G**
Get him, kid!
**[09:16] (Flashback) Abu**
*This brat!*
**[09:21] (Flashback) Ho**
That's a nice kick, brat.
**[09:24] (Flashback) Ho**
The Harusame's 7th Division
Commander accepts your challenge.
**[09:28] (Flashback) Ho**
Hey, small fry.
**[09:30] (Flashback) Ho**
Anyone who throws a serious punch
at you, be they a whelp or otherwise,
**[09:35] (Flashback) Ho**
must be met with a serious punch in turn.
**[09:37] (Flashback) Ho**
That's basic courtesy as a man.
**[09:46] (Flashback) Ho**
Do you wish to be strong?
**[09:48] (Flashback) Ho**
Then learn how weak you are.
**[09:52] (Flashback) Ho**
Come again.
**[09:55] (Flashback) Ho**
That kid...
**[10:00] (Flashback) Ho**
He had the same eyes as him.
**[10:03] Kam**
I wanted to know a form of
strength that was unlike his.
**[10:07] Kam**
But at the same time that
I realized how weak I was,
**[10:12] Kam**
I realized that I, that man,
**[10:15] Kam**
our family...
**[10:18] Kam**
We couldn't save her.
**[10:22] Kam**
Then I...
**[10:31] (Flashback) Kam**
Then... I...
**[10:43] (Flashback) Ho**
Damn rabbit.
**[10:45] (Flashback) Ho**
You land a hit on me, the great Hosen?
**[10:49] (Flashback) Ho**
Tell me what you want.
**[10:50] (Flashback) Ho**
To be beaten to death
right here and now, or...
**[10:56] (Flashback) Kam**
Take us away.
**[10:58] (Flashback) Kam**
Take Mom and me away from this planet.
**[11:02] (Flashback) Kam**
Mom, let's go back to your planet.
**[11:06] (Flashback) Ko**
When did you find out?
**[11:09] (Flashback) Kag**
I'm sure you'll get better if we go back.
**[11:13] (Flashback) Kag**
Even a withering flower can be saved
if it's planted back into the earth...
**[11:16] (Flashback) Ko**
Kamui.
**[11:18] (Flashback) Ko**
Let me stay here.
**[11:21] (Flashback) Ko**
I want to be by your side.
**[11:23] (Flashback) Kam**
You don't have to.
**[11:26] (Flashback) Kam**
I don't care if we can't call
ourselves family anymore.
**[11:28] (Flashback) Kam**
I still want you to live.
**[11:33] (Flashback) Ko**
Why would you inherit that part of him, too?
**[11:39] (Flashback) Kag**
Mommy!
**[11:40] (Flashback) Kag**
What are you doing, Kamui?
**[11:42] (Flashback) Kag**
Where are you taking Mommy?
**[11:45] (Flashback) Kag**
Daddy!
**[11:47] (Flashback) UB**
Why choose to do this now, when I'm home?
**[11:51] (Flashback) Kam**
Because I know...
**[11:53] (Flashback) Kam**
That to save Mom, I have to cast
aside the idea of being family.
**[11:58] (Flashback) Kam**
That I have to walk over you to do it.
**[12:03] Kam**
That's right.
**[12:04] Kam**
I no longer...
**[12:09] Kam**
Out of my way!
**[12:16] (Flashback) UB**
Stop it, Kamui.
**[12:17] (Flashback) UB**
I'll save Mom!
**[12:19] (Flashback) UB**
I thought I promised you that!
**[12:22] (Flashback) UB**
Wait! There's something I want to show—
**[12:26] (Flashback) UB**
Look at this!
**[12:27] (Flashback) UB**
With this, Mom can...
**[12:31] (Flashback) Kam**
I grew stronger to protect my family.
**[12:35] (Flashback) Kam**
You're the one who told me to do it.
**[12:37] (Flashback) Kam**
So I'm going to take Mom with me, even if
I have to cut off your arm that's stopping us.
**[12:44] (Flashback) Kam**
I will protect my family, even
if we're no longer a family.
**[12:51] Kam**
Whatever you and I tried to protect
**[12:56] Kam**
no longer exists.
**[13:07] Kam**
I abandoned my family and failed
to protect our mother...
**[13:12] (Flashback) Kam**
All I have left is to grow stronger.
**[13:16] Kam**
All I have left is to surpass that man.
**[13:21] Kam**
So, Kagura,
**[13:25] Kam**
please let me go.
**[13:27] Kam**
Stop getting in my way.
**[13:30] Kam**
That face, and that voice...
**[13:36] Kam**
Don't force me to keep
seeing and hearing them.
**[13:57] Abu**
I can't budge an inch.
**[14:01] UB**
*I've never had this feeling before.*
**[14:03] UB**
*If I must fight him,*
**[14:07] UB**
*this planet is too small a stage to do it.*
**[14:11] UB**
*My weapon can't keep up.*
**[14:14] UB**
*And my body*
**[14:16] UB**
*is being a nuisance.*
**[14:20] UB**
*I feel like everything's shackling me.*
**[14:23] UB**
*Faced with that thing,*
**[14:25] UB**
*even being alive feels restrictive!*
**[14:30] UB**
* Kouka, I'm the kind of idiot who drove*
* even you, an immortal, to death.*
**[14:37] UB**
* But there are some things*
* only idiots are capable of.*
**[14:40] UB**
*Lend me your strength...*
**[14:42] UB**
*Help me protect our family!*
**[14:51] U**
What are you playing at?
**[14:52] UB**
I'm trying to rip out
an immortal's soul here.
**[14:55] UB**
I have to be prepared
to cast everything off
**[14:58] UB**
and fight with my bare essence, too.
**[15:04] U**
Crushing my heart won't make me disappear.
**[15:08] UB**
Your heart isn't the only thing here.
**[15:11] UB**
There's also the gift I was going to
give my wife, an Altana crystal.
**[15:17] UB**
You're beings born from Altana.
**[15:20] UB**
You can't stay alive if you're
torn apart from your home planet.
**[15:24] UB**
To keep my wife alive,
**[15:26] UB**
I looked all over that planet for
any remaining Altana crystals.
**[15:31] UB**
I never expected to use one this way.
**[15:34] UB**
Were you born on Earth?
**[15:37] UB**
I wonder what will happen if I crush
this crystal along with your heart.
**[15:42] U**
What do you think will happen first?
You doing that, or me chopping you in half?
**[15:46] UB**
Beats me.
**[15:47] UB**
But I know that, at the very least,
**[15:50] UB**
I was the type of guy who'd buy gifts
for his wife a month in advance!
**[16:03] UB**
As you were born on Earth,
**[16:06] UB**
exposing you to Altana from a different planet
**[16:07] UB**
is like filling a gasoline car with diesel.
**[16:11] UB**
Your engine is bound to break down.
**[16:14] UB**
Die, just like us.
**[16:20] UB**
Kouka, I finally managed to deliver
**[16:26] UB**
my final present to you.
**[16:32] UB**
Please accept it.
**[16:38] Abu**
Umibozu!
**[16:45] U**
If I could die just from that,
I wouldn't have such a hard time.
**[16:49] U**
It's too bad.
**[16:52] U**
So not even you could kill me, huh?
**[17:02] Kag**
Daddy...
**[17:05] Abu**
Umibozu!
**[17:09] Abu**
*Why are there two of him?*
**[17:12] Abu**
*It can't be!*
**[17:13] Abu**
* He regenerated from his*
* lopped-off right arm?*
**[17:17] U**
It seems we both had the same idea.
**[17:23] U**
The only difference is that he
only had one life to throw away.
**[17:28] Abu**
You monster!
**[17:32] U**
But it looks like I've run out of Altana.
**[17:37] U**
Thanks to you,
**[17:38] U**
for the first time in centuries,
I got to experience death
**[17:40] U**
and this feeling of being alive.
**[17:44] U**
But that, too, is but an opening
act for the end that is to come.
**[17:50] U**
Let us meet again someday in the afterlife.
**[17:57] Abu**
Hang in there! Hey!
**[18:00] U**
Looks like he left.
**[18:04] U**
That means I've won.
**[18:09] U**
I lost my left arm casting aside my family,
**[18:12] U**
but I lost my right arm protecting it.
**[18:18] U**
It was a surprisingly good job, for me.
**[18:22] Abu**
You...
**[18:23] Kam**
Good job, my ass.
**[18:25] Kam**
Didn't you have your right arm for the
sole purpose of beating your stupid son?
**[18:31] Kam**
Why is it lying over there?
**[18:33] Kam**
Why did you let a guy
like that humiliate you?
**[18:37] Kam**
Stand up.
**[18:38] Kam**
We haven't settled our score yet.
**[18:41] Abu**
Commander...
**[18:42] Kam**
I know you're better than this!
**[18:46] Kam**
Stand up!
**[18:47] Abu**
Stop, Commander.
**[18:49] Abu**
Umibozu, your dad, is already...
**[18:53] Kag**
Stop, Kamui!
**[19:07] Kag**
Gin-chan...
**[19:09] Kag**
Shinpachi...
**[19:11] Kam**
What are you here for?
**[19:13] Gin**
You want to tell us to keep our
noses out of your family's business?
**[19:16] Gin**
Sure, we're not related by blood.
**[19:20] Gin**
However, we lived under the
same roof, ate the same food,
**[19:24] Gin**
and we laughed, cried, and
got mad at the same things.
**[19:28] Gin**
We're Odd Jobs.
**[19:32] Gin**
We don't need blood ties
or a reason to help her.
**[19:36] Shin**
Kamui-san.
**[19:37] Shin**
Unclench your fist.
**[19:40] Shin**
Don't make Kagura-chan, your family,
**[19:42] Shin**
and yourself suffer any more.
**[19:45] Kam**
You're the ones making her suffer.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[19:49] Kam**
She finally found another home.
**[19:52] Kam**
Are you trying to force me to break it down?
**[19:55] Shin**
We won't break.
**[19:58] Shin**
Just as Kagura-chan never let go of you,
**[20:01] Shin**
we won't let her or anyone else go, either.
**[20:05] Shin**
So neither you nor we will ever break.
**[20:09] Kam**
It's too late. There's no going back.
**[20:12] Kam**
My mother's gone.
**[20:15] Kam**
Things won't end for us
until one of us goes down.
**[20:20] Gin**
That so?
**[20:21] Gin**
I'll put an end to things for you, then.
**[20:27] UB**
What are you...
**[20:33] Gin**
This makes me the one who
took down the strongest.
**[20:37] Gin**
I'm the strongest now.
**[20:38] Shin**
Who are you kidding?!
**[20:40] UB**
Oh, did a fly land on my head?
**[20:42] Shin**
You didn't hurt him at all!
If anything, you only hurt yourself!
**[20:45] Shin**
Headbutting a half-dead man
and getting hurt instead
**[20:47] Shin**
makes you the worst and the weakest!
**[20:49] Gin**
No matter what anyone says,
**[20:51] Gin**
I'm the one who finished him off.
**[20:54] Gin**
I've inherited the title of "strongest."
**[20:56] Gin**
Along with the job of babysitting you, Kamui.
**[21:01] Gin**
What you've been looking for is right here.
**[21:04] Gin**
If you want some, come get some.
**[21:06] Gin**
Try throwing everything you picked
up to defeat that baldy at me.
**[21:12] Gin**
Your dreams, all your hard work,
and your desire to be the strongest...
**[21:17] Gin**
I'm going to trample all over
them as a complete stranger.
**[21:21] Gin**
That's how worthless the thing
you've always wanted is.
**[21:25] Kam**
Didn't you hear me?
**[21:27] Kam**
I told you to get out of my way!
**[21:30] Gin**
Didn't you hear me?
**[21:32] Gin**
I told you to come at me
with everything you've got.
**[21:39] Gin**
Is that all you've got?
**[21:41] Gin**
You could never beat your old man with that.
**[21:45] Gin**
You thought you were chasing after him,
**[21:47] Gin**
but you'd started running
from him at some point.
**[21:50] Gin**
From your old man, from your family.
**[21:53] Gin**
You're empty.
**[21:55] Gin**
That's why you wanted to
find a purpose for yourself.
**[21:58] Gin**
But with your weak fists,
you couldn't blow away
**[22:01] Gin**
your old man's wig, let alone me.
**[22:05] Gin**
Strongest?
**[22:06] Gin**
You don't need a title like that.
**[22:09] Gin**
You already have one that
fits you perfectly...
**[22:13] Gin**
You stupid brother!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 10
**[23:49] Kam**
You hadn't thrown it away yet?
**[23:50] Kag**
Stop, Kamui!
***SIGN*** Siblings
**[23:52] Gin**
This is as far as you go.
***SIGN*** Gintoki took over the title of "strongest" with one headbutt.
***SIGN*** He takes on Kamui, a member of the combat race Yato, to see who's number one!
***SIGN*** As Kagura and Shinpachi look on,
***SIGN*** something strange happens to Kamui...
# 326 - Siblings
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:11] (Flashback) UB**
Kagura wants to save him.
**[00:16] (Flashback) UB**
Despite all the badmouthing she does,
**[00:19] (Flashback) UB**
she wishes for her brother to
go back to how he used to be.
**[00:24] (Flashback) UB**
Even if the two of you end
up facing off, I'm sure...
**[00:31] (Flashback) UB**
Earthlings are an odd bunch.
**[00:34] (Flashback) UB**
They make graves for people they hated.
**[00:37] (Flashback) UB**
Maybe you could find
**[00:41] (Flashback) UB**
a different solution than mine.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 10
***SIGN*** Siblings
***SIGN*** Watch the Battle on Rakuyo arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[02:25] Kam**
Stupid brother?
**[02:27] Kam**
Even if a tiny part of me still remains one,
**[02:32] Kam**
it dies today!
**[02:34] Kam**
Along with the stupid brother from Earth!
**[02:40] UB**
*He's crazy.*
**[02:42] UB**
*An Earthling could never beat a Yato.*
**[02:44] UB**
*An Earthling could never beat him.*
**[02:47] UB**
*He's even stronger than Hosen right now.*
**[02:53] Kam**
I emptied myself out of my own free will.
**[02:57] Kam**
The title of "strongest" is too big
to fit someone who isn't empty.
**[03:04] Kam**
You should've stayed on your little
planet, protecting your little family.
**[03:11] Kam**
Why did you face me when you lack
the resolve to empty yourself?
**[03:16] Kam**
You will die without being
able to protect anything.
**[03:18] Kam**
And she will lose everything
**[03:21] Kam**
because of you and me,
**[03:22] Kam**
her two stupid brothers!
**[03:25] Kag**
Gin-chan!
**[03:41] Gin**
You don't need resolve to become empty.
**[03:45] Gin**
Kamui...
**[03:47] Gin**
As you say, I'm far from being the strongest.
**[03:52] Gin**
You may be much closer to it.
**[03:59] Gin**
But I still don't see myself losing.
**[04:05] Gin**
Strength that has nothing to lose
**[04:08] Gin**
is the same as weakness that
can't protect anything.
**[04:11] Gin**
You can't take anyone or anything from me.
**[04:16] Kam**
You can't even protect yourself!
**[04:19] Kam**
What could you possibly protect from me?
**[04:21] Kam**
And if you can't protect something,
**[04:22] Kam**
keep your hands off of it to begin with!
**[04:33] UB**
*Is that fear?*
**[04:35] UB**
*No, he's being thrown off...*
**[04:39] UB**
*By his eyes, which keep coming back to life.*
**[04:48] UB**
*By his sword.*
**[04:56] UB**
That guy...
**[04:58] Shin**
He's the same as Kamui-san.
**[05:02] Shin**
Just as Kamui-san kept fighting in
order to obtain the title of strongest,
**[05:08] Shin**
he kept fighting, too,
**[05:10] Shin**
for an entirely different name.
**[05:15] Kam**
What are your eyes fixed on?
**[05:19] Kam**
You're not looking at me.
**[05:21] Kam**
Even when you went up
against Hosen and Shinsuke,
**[05:25] Kam**
you were off fighting a different
battle all by yourself.
**[05:29] Kam**
Who are you fighting?
**[05:31] Kam**
What name are you fighting for?
**[05:35] Gin**
Just like you,
**[05:38] Gin**
I used to be empty.
**[05:41] Gin**
Once I lost everything and learned
how terrifying that could be,
**[05:45] Gin**
I kept living an empty life,
**[05:48] Gin**
with no meaning or name of any kind.
**[05:52] Gin**
But the ones who gave meaning
to the empty me once more
**[05:57] Gin**
were the people who'd become
a part of me at some point,
**[06:00] Gin**
your sister and everyone else.
**[06:03] Gin**
Those audacious pests
just barged into my life
**[06:08] Gin**
and gave me a new name.
**[06:11] Gin**
That's when I realized
**[06:13] Gin**
that I hadn't actually lost anything.
**[06:17] Gin**
That I was just cowering and
running away from it all.
**[06:22] Gin**
I'll never run away again...
**[06:24] Gin**
Not from protecting something or losing it.
**[06:28] Gin**
I don't need a title as fancy as "strongest"
**[06:31] Gin**
or one as sorry as "stupid brother from Earth."
**[06:36] Gin**
I'm Odd Jobs Gin-chan.
**[06:40] Gin**
I swear on this name they gave me
**[06:42] Gin**
that I won't lose...
**[06:45] Gin**
Not to you or myself.
**[06:49] Gin**
So, Kamui,
**[06:51] Gin**
you shouldn't lose, either.
**[06:53] Gin**
Remember.
**[06:55] Gin**
Remember that thing lying at the
very depths of the empty you...
**[06:58] Gin**
Your real name!
**[07:07] UB**
*That's right.*
**[07:09] UB**
*That's how he... how samurai are.*
**[07:14] UB**
*If they have something to protect,*
**[07:17] UB**
* they won't hesitate to face enemies*
* far stronger than themselves.*
**[07:23] UB**
* Their eyes aren't fixed on*
* the wall in front of them,*
**[07:26] UB**
*but rather the wall within, their own limits.*
**[07:31] UB**
* In order to break down not*
* their enemy, but their limits,*
**[07:35] UB**
* they keep fighting everyone's*
* biggest enemy, themselves.*
**[07:40] UB**
*And they get stronger every time they do.*
**[07:42] UB**
*Kamui...*
**[07:44] UB**
*The higher you soar above him,*
**[07:48] UB**
*the higher he will jump.*
**[07:52] Gin**
How many walls remain?
**[08:20] Kam**
This is as far as you go.
**[08:23] Kam**
Stop, Kamui!
**[08:31] Gin**
And this is as far as you go,
**[08:35] Gin**
you stupid brother.
**[08:45] Kag**
*For a moment there, he just...*
**[08:48] Gin**
Did you get a look at the
depths of your emptiness?
**[08:53] Gin**
What you saw there is your real name.
**[09:03] Kam**
*You still haven't thrown that name away?*
**[09:09] Kam**
*That's why you'll lose to someone like him.*
**[09:14] Kam**
*If you can't do it yourself,*
**[09:16] Kam**
*then I'll do it for you.*
**[09:19] Kam**
*Your sister, your old man,*
**[09:21] Kam**
*and the person you used to be...*
**[09:25] Kam**
*I'll erase it all for you.*
**[09:42] Kag**
K-Kamui?
**[09:44] Kag**
You...
**[09:46] Shin**
* He looks just like*
* Kagura-chan did back then.*
**[09:51] Abu**
That moron went and got himself consumed.
**[09:55] Abu**
That's no longer anyone's
stupid brother or commander.
**[09:59] Abu**
It's just a beast that's even
forgotten its own name.
**[10:07] Shin**
Kagura-chan!
**[10:16] Gin**
His limiter's off, huh?
**[10:23] Kag**
Stop it, Kamui!
**[10:25] Kag**
If you keep going, your body will...
**[10:33] Kag**
Gin-chan!
**[10:39] Abu**
Run away.
**[10:41] Abu**
Take that baldy and run right away.
**[10:43] Abu**
I have no interest in your family spat.
**[10:46] Abu**
If you wanna kill your kid sister
or your old man, feel free.
**[10:50] Abu**
But kill them when you're
yourself, Commander.
**[10:54] Abu**
Do your father's punches hurt so much that
you lose yourself to your Yato blood?
**[11:02] Abu**
Does punching your sister hurt that much?
**[11:05] Abu**
These guys are the same.
**[11:07] Abu**
They're enduring that pain to fight you.
**[11:11] Abu**
And here you're running away?
**[11:13] Abu**
If you're gonna run with your tail between
your legs from a fight you started,
**[11:17] Abu**
then don't raise your hand to begin with.
**[11:19] Abu**
If you're gonna fight,
do it with your own hands.
**[11:23] Abu**
And if you refuse to listen to
your vice commander's advice,
**[11:28] Abu**
then so be it.
**[11:30] Abu**
I'm used to being forced to tag
along with my stupid commander.
**[11:35] Abu**
If you're gonna keep fighting until you die,
**[11:38] Abu**
then the 7th Division will
fight with you all the way.
**[11:41] Abu**
Go!
**[11:43] Shin**
Abuto-san!
**[11:50] (Flashback) H**
Hey, it's time to set sail.
**[12:01] (Flashback) H**
Where's your mother?
**[12:04] (Flashback) H**
I had hopes for you as a villain since you
wanted to kidnap her using a pirate ship.
**[12:10] (Flashback) H**
But it looks like I overestimated you.
**[12:12] (Flashback) H**
Get lost.
**[12:13] (Flashback) H**
This world is no place for babies like you.
**[12:16] (Flashback) Kam**
What does that make you?
**[12:17] (Flashback) Kam**
Can you really call yourself a pirate
when you can't kidnap one measly kid?
**[12:22] (Flashback) Abu**
Deep down, you wanted someone
to stop you, didn't you?
**[12:26] (Flashback) Abu**
Isn't that why you tried to kidnap
your mom when your dad was around?
**[12:32] (Flashback) Abu**
It's still not too late. You can stop now.
**[12:41] Abu**
* Back then, you started walking*
* forward with no hesitation,*
**[12:45] Abu**
*and I couldn't stop you.*
**[12:48] Abu**
*Because I was the same as you.*
**[12:52] Abu**
* Nowhere to go back to.*
* The only way to go was forward.*
**[12:56] Abu**
* The 7th Division was filled*
* with people like that.*
**[12:59] Abu**
* That's why, when you moved forward*
* without ever looking back,*
**[13:03] Abu**
*when you rushed on ahead of us,*
**[13:06] Abu**
*we were drawn to you.*
**[13:08] Abu**
*Empty or not,*
**[13:11] Abu**
* the sight of you relentlessly charging*
* forward in pursuit of strength,*
**[13:16] Abu**
* the sight of you smiling in the*
* very face of death as you fought,*
**[13:20] Abu**
*was our pride and joy.*
**[13:25] Abu**
*If that's a sin,*
**[13:27] Abu**
* then I'll atone for it as the*
* guy who couldn't stop you.*
**[13:31] Abu**
*So...*
**[13:33] Abu**
Smile, Commander.
**[13:36] Abu**
Don't fight with a look that's
totally unlike you, moron.
**[13:56] Shin**
We won't let anyone die anymore!
**[13:59] Shin**
We swear on our... on Odd Jobs's name!
**[14:03] Kag**
K-Kamui.
**[14:05] Kag**
You're not taking anything away anymore.
**[14:08] Kag**
You're not losing anything anymore.
**[14:10] Kag**
I...
**[14:11] Kag**
We'll protect that name, the last
thing remaining within you...
**[14:16] Kag**
We'll protect you, stupid brother!
**[14:18] Kag**
So don't go letting your
stupid instincts beat you!
**[14:49] Abu**
*Those brats...*
**[14:52] (Flashback) Shin**
I'll protect Kagura-chan!
**[14:53] (Flashback) Shin**
I'll protect the Kagura-chan we believe in!
**[15:04] (Flashback) Kag**
I want to become stronger...
**[15:08] (Flashback) Kag**
Strong enough to protect everyone.
**[15:11] (Flashback) Kag**
Strong enough to not lose to myself.
**[15:14] (Flashback) Shin**
I feel the same way.
**[15:16] (Flashback) Shin**
Every time we protected something,
**[15:18] (Flashback) Shin**
we became a little stronger, didn't we?
**[15:24] (Flashback) Shin**
So let's wipe our tears and go.
**[15:28] (Flashback) Shin**
I'm sure we'll become a little stronger.
**[15:39] Kag**
*I won't cry anymore!*
**[15:41] Shin**
*I won't lose anymore!*
**[15:43] Kag**
*We've protected many things...*
**[15:45] Shin**
*...and lost many!*
**[15:47] Kag**
*Have we gotten stronger?*
**[15:50] Shin**
*Have we made any progress?*
**[15:52] Bo**
*We don't know!*
**[15:54] Kag**
*But...*
**[15:57] (Flashback) Kag**
Earth?
**[15:59] (Flashback) Ko**
Yeah. Your father told me
about it a long time ago.
**[16:03] (Flashback) Ko**
That there's a very beautiful
blue planet out there.
**[16:08] (Flashback) Ko**
Well, knowing how sloppy that man is,
**[16:11] (Flashback) Ko**
he's probably lost all memory
of it along with his hair.
**[16:15] (Flashback) Kag**
Let's go to Earth, Mommy.
**[16:18] (Flashback) Kag**
Let's go with Daddy and
Kamui when you're better.
**[16:21] (Flashback) Kag**
The whole family, together.
**[16:24] (Flashback) Kag**
I bet he'll come flying
back once you're better.
**[16:30] (Flashback) Ko**
Really?
**[16:31] (Flashback) Ko**
Guess I should get well soon, then.
**[16:33] (Flashback) Kag**
Yep. So you should sleep now.
**[16:37] (Flashback) Ko**
Yeah, yeah.
**[16:43] (Flashback) Ko**
Kagura...
**[16:46] (Flashback) Ko**
Thank you.
**[16:48] (Flashback) Ko**
For always being there.
**[16:51] (Flashback) Ko**
So long as you're around,
our family will be just fine.
**[16:57] (Flashback) Ko**
Even when the day comes for
you to build your own family,
**[17:00] (Flashback) Ko**
try to make it one just like that.
**[17:03] (Flashback) Ko**
It doesn't matter if they're fools or idiots,
**[17:07] (Flashback) Ko**
as long as they're with you
in both good times and bad,
**[17:13] (Flashback) Ko**
always by your side.
**[17:16] (Flashback) Ko**
Find people like that.
**[17:21] Kag**
*Mommy...*
**[17:22] Kag**
* We never went to Earth*
* as a family in the end,*
**[17:27] Kag**
*but I did find on that blue planet*
**[17:39] Kag**
*the biggest fool,*
**[17:42] Kag**
*the biggest idiot, and Odd Jobs.*
**[17:49] Kag**
*That's why I won't lose.*
**[17:52] Kag**
*So long as they laugh by my side*
**[17:58] Kag**
*and cry by my side,*
**[18:01] Kag**
*I'll laugh and cry with you, too.*
**[18:04] Kag**
*I'll fight by your side,*
**[18:08] Kag**
* just like how you always*
* fought alongside us.*
**[18:54] Kam**
You're a nuisance.
**[18:57] Kam**
Stay out of my way.
**[19:00] Kam**
Get lost, my Yato blood.
**[19:04] Kam**
It's just a sibling spat.
**[19:07] Kam**
Let me fight with my own hands.
**[19:11] Kam**
I can't afford to lose to you anymore.
**[19:22] Kam**
Like hell I could lose.
**[19:26] Kam**
A big bro can't keep losing to
his little sister like this.
**[19:34] Kam**
Let me win already, little sis.
**[19:56] Kag**
This fight is over already.
**[19:59] Kag**
Whether you chose not to punch me
**[20:01] Kag**
or just couldn't do it,
**[20:06] Kag**
your fists can't beat me.
**[20:11] Kag**
You can't shake off your little sister's arm.
**[20:17] (Flashback) Kag**
Mommy! Mommy!
**[20:22] (Flashback) Kag**
Daddy!
**[20:28] (Flashback) UB**
Kouka?
**[20:29] (Flashback) UB**
Kouka!
**[20:33] (Flashback) Ko**
Welcome home,
**[20:37] (Flashback) Ko**
Kanko...
**[20:40] (Flashback) Ko**
Kamui...
**[20:45] (Flashback) Ko**
All four members of our family are
finally back together, Kagura...
**[20:54] (Flashback) Ko**
It has to be all of us, together.
**[21:00] (Flashback) Ko**
Now, we can finally all go
**[21:07] (Flashback) Ko**
to Earth.
**[21:13] Kag**
Back then, you were by Mommy's side, too.
**[21:19] Kag**
No matter how much you run,
**[21:23] Kag**
no matter how far you go,
**[21:26] Kag**
you can't shake us off.
**[21:31] Kag**
Kamui, you're Mommy's...
**[21:35] Kag**
Our family.
**[21:39] Abu**
* Thousands of punches couldn't ever*
* take the Harusame's strongest man out,*
**[21:46] Abu**
* but just one teardrop from*
* his sister knocked him out.*
**[21:54] Abu**
* His face looked like he'd cried himself*
* to sleep on his mother's lap...*
**[22:00] Abu**
*Like a little boy.*
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] O**
I got my wings from the same man, so I know.
**[23:43] Sh**
I will fight, too,
**[23:45] Sh**
with the reaper within me.
**[23:47] Sh**
A school where a teacher and
his students learn together...
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 11
**[23:50] Sh**
That sounds wonderful.
***SIGN*** It's not over just yet.
***SIGN*** Next time, we'll take a look at Oboro's past.
***SIGN*** We'll take a look at some really important stuff
***SIGN*** like what made Yoshida Shoyo who he was.
# 327 - First Student
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:19] UB**
Kouka?
**[00:22] UB**
I see.
**[00:24] UB**
I guess I messed up royally.
**[00:28] UB**
But I can finally join you now...
**[00:34] UB**
You won't let me, huh?
**[00:38] UB**
I've now become
**[00:41] UB**
a father who can neither beat nor
embrace his naughty children.
**[00:46] UB**
What could I possibly do now?
**[00:50] UB**
Come on, Kouka...
**[00:53] UB**
Tell me.
**[01:05] M**
You always were that kind of man.
**[01:08] M**
Whenever I thought you
couldn't survive something,
**[01:11] M**
you came back to life like it was nothing
**[01:14] M**
and told me of adventures
that set my heart aflutter.
**[01:18] M**
I can't wait to hear your story this time.
**[01:25] UB**
Even if it's just complaining
that'll make your heart burn?
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 11
***SIGN*** First Student
***SIGN*** Watch the Battle on Rakuyo arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[03:09] Abu**
Such troublesome siblings.
**[03:13] Abu**
What makes them think they need
to pass out more than we do?
**[03:17] Gin**
You can say that again.
**[03:18] Gin**
If a babe's willing to
let me rest on her lap,
**[03:20] Gin**
I'd like to jump in there right now.
**[03:23] Gin**
But, unfortunately, it looks
like that'll have to wait.
**[03:28] Gin**
All I see around me are the
disgusting crotches of dudes.
**[03:31] Gin**
It'd probably give me nightmares.
**[03:33] Abu**
I feel like we're already having one.
**[03:37] Gin**
Then we should hope for some
rousing activity that'll wake us up.
**[03:42] G**
Hold it.
**[03:44] G**
Don't jump to conclusions.
**[03:46] G**
Like we'd ever be cheap enough
to fight wounded men.
**[03:50] Abu**
Shokaku, one of the Three Mad Stars!
**[03:52] G**
He was until a while ago, that is.
**[03:55] G**
Now that we've lost to the samurai
**[03:57] G**
and were cast aside by our master,
**[04:00] G**
we're basically the same as you.
**[04:02] Abu**
Were cast aside?
**[04:04] Abu**
You mean you cast him aside.
**[04:06] Sho**
One thing's for sure:
**[04:08] Sho**
that man held no pride as a pirate,
**[04:12] Sho**
and I never had any loyalty
worth throwing away for him.
**[04:16] Sho**
Pirates are supposed to be free spirits.
**[04:20] Sho**
That's how I felt watching you guys...
**[04:24] Sho**
You looked to be having so much more fun.
**[04:27] G**
Now, let us ask you.
**[04:29] G**
Does the 7th Division,
**[04:30] G**
Harusame's thunderbolt,
still remain unbroken?
**[04:34] Abu**
Who knows?
**[04:36] Abu**
I sure don't.
**[04:38] Abu**
I don't even know if the guy
lying there is our commander
**[04:41] Abu**
or just another big brother.
**[04:44] Abu**
The only thing I can say for sure is...
**[04:48] Abu**
This isn't like you.
**[04:51] Abu**
Be it on a battlefield
or on your sister's lap,
**[04:54] Abu**
it's not like you to stay down.
**[04:56] Abu**
It's not like you to stay down
after being beat up and losing.
**[05:05] Abu**
I won't lose again.
**[05:09] Abu**
Not to anyone.
**[05:14] Abu**
I...
**[05:16] Abu**
However long I spent as
a son and a big brother,
**[05:19] Abu**
I've spent far longer living as a pirate.
**[05:23] Abu**
I never planned on turning back anyway.
**[05:27] Abu**
I can only keep going.
**[05:29] Abu**
So far ahead, my little sister
will never be able to catch up.
**[05:33] Abu**
So high up, I can look down on my old man.
**[05:38] Abu**
And so far away, I'll be able to reach her.
**[05:43] Abu**
Unless I'm willing to go that far,
**[05:47] Abu**
I'll never be able to catch up
**[05:50] Abu**
or go back there.
**[05:57] UB**
I came here to stop that beast.
**[06:01] UB**
I was even willing to kill him,
**[06:03] UB**
because I thought that was
my duty as his father.
**[06:07] UB**
But I couldn't do it.
**[06:11] UB**
And it was probably the same for him.
**[06:15] UB**
No matter how far apart we
drifted, we were family.
**[06:19] UB**
The resolve we needed wasn't
to cut our ties as family.
**[06:26] UB**
Those ties weren't going
to snap no matter what.
**[06:29] UB**
So even if we got tangled up
in them and suffered at times,
**[06:33] UB**
we needed the resolve to hold on to
those ties and draw them closer.
**[06:39] UB**
I was made to realize that
**[06:41] UB**
by the girl who never let go of those ties.
**[06:46] UB**
And by the bizarre ties
who always came with her.
**[06:54] Gin**
Hey.
**[06:56] Gin**
Enjoy your holiday?
**[06:58] Kag**
Sorry for acting so selfish.
**[07:01] Kag**
I didn't want to drag you guys into this.
**[07:04] Kag**
But...
**[07:08] Gin**
I'd always wondered where a kid
**[07:09] Gin**
would have to be born to grow
up into a crude brat like you.
**[07:14] Gin**
I have my answer now.
**[07:16] Gin**
What a filthy town.
**[07:19] Gin**
But it's just like our own.
**[07:23] Gin**
We got to see the family and
town that brought you up.
**[07:27] Gin**
Not a bad holiday.
**[07:29] Gin**
So, put that thing away.
**[07:33] Shin**
You can't ignore Umibozu-san
and leave, right?
**[07:37] Shin**
Even so, we can't accept
a resignation letter.
**[07:41] Shin**
A leave letter is good enough.
**[07:45] Shin**
So come back again sometime
**[07:48] Shin**
to your other home.
**[07:51] Kag**
No...
**[07:52] [SONG] ---**
Paid Leave Request
**[07:53] Kag**
That's not what this is.
**[07:55] Kag**
Can we make this not an
ordinary holiday, but paid leave?
**[08:01] Kag**
What are you doing to a
wounded girl, you scumbags?!
**[08:04] Gin**
In Odd Jobs, a request for paid leave
is the same as a request for death.
**[08:07] Gin**
And I accepted yours.
**[08:09] Kag**
My purse is empty thanks to your measly pay!
**[08:11] Kag**
You could at least offer
to share some of my load!
**[08:13] Gin**
What did you use all your money on?
**[08:14] Kag**
Staying at hotels, buying art,
China dresses for calligraphy.
**[08:18] Kag**
They were all necessary expenses.
**[08:19] Shin**
Who are you, an ex-governor of Tokyo?!
**[08:21] Kag**
I'll also need to pay for
the baldy's treatment now!
**[08:22] Kag**
Cut me some slack, you outsiders!
**[08:24] Gin**
What treatment does the baldy even need?
**[08:26] Gin**
So what if he lost an arm or two?
That monster will be just fine.
**[08:29] Gin**
Apply some aloe, and they'll
grow back eventually.
**[08:31] Shin**
They're not hair!
**[08:32] Gin**
I don't think his hair's gonna grow back.
**[08:33] Shin**
Why is his hair more
hopeless than his arms?!
**[08:37] Abu**
It's true!
**[08:39] Abu**
My arms grew back!
**[08:40] M**
Yes, I figured combat prosthetics
would be best for you.
**[08:44] Adlib**
Asura Temple!
**[08:45] UB**
I'd like some more firepower.
**[08:47] UB**
Oh, and put it on their tab.
**[08:50] M**
Certainly.
**[08:50] Gin**
Screw you!
**[08:51] Gin**
He's the picture of good health!
**[08:53] Shin**
Someone pay for our treatment, too!
**[08:58] Sak**
I'll put the ship's repair
fees on your tab, too.
**[09:02] Sak**
Now, then. The trade talks are over.
**[09:04] Sak**
So how about we close this deal, too?
**[09:10] Sak**
Members of the Kiheitai.
**[09:12] Sak**
You ran off partway without a word.
**[09:15] Sak**
What happened?
**[09:16] Sak**
Where's Takasugi?
**[09:19] Hen**
I bring a message from Shinsuke-dono.
**[09:31] Mat**
So annoying!
**[09:32] Mat**
How far are they gonna chase us?
**[09:34] Hen**
It seems we've been separated
from Katsura and the Kaientai.
**[09:37] Hen**
At this rate...
**[09:38] Tak**
I don't recall teaming up with
them in the first place.
**[09:42] Tak**
I don't want to be further indebted to them.
**[09:44] Tak**
I'll pay them back with interest someday.
**[09:48] Tak**
Of course...
**[09:50] Tak**
You too,
**[09:52] Tak**
Oboro.
**[09:53] Mat**
Wha...
**[09:55] Ob**
Good job leading them here.
**[09:58] Ob**
The Harusame have started to retreat.
**[09:59] Ob**
You all should leave, too.
**[10:01] Ob**
Hurry up and go.
**[10:05] Mat**
What are you playing at?
**[10:09] Obo**
Your survival was unexpected,
**[10:13] Obo**
but the true purpose of
this battle lies elsewhere.
**[10:16] Obo**
Compared to that man fulfilling
his longstanding desire,
**[10:19] Obo**
what happens to the lives of insects that
crawl on the ground doesn't matter.
**[10:23] Tak**
Then why are you here?
**[10:27] Tak**
To make excuses for losing to mere insects?
**[10:29] Obo**
Because I know.
**[10:32] Obo**
That some insects will never give up,
**[10:35] Obo**
flapping their wings until
they reach the heavens.
**[10:38] Obo**
I got my wings from the same man, so I know.
**[10:43] Tak**
The same man?
**[10:45] Tak**
The monster crow you follow and Sensei?
**[10:49] Tak**
Yoshida Shoyo died.
**[10:52] Tak**
And one of the people who
killed him stands before me.
**[10:56] Obo**
I don't care either way.
**[10:59] Obo**
I merely wish to remove
all obstacles in his way.
**[11:05] Obo**
I will use the last remaining flames
of my life to burn your wings away!
**[11:29] (Flashback) G**
Is that all of them?
**[11:30] (Flashback) G**
Yeah.
**[11:33] (Flashback) G**
It's all over now.
**[11:45] (Flashback) Obo**
Is this what they call death,
**[11:50] (Flashback) Obo**
reaper?
**[12:10] (Flashback) U**
This is all I can do for you.
**[12:19] (Flashback) Obo**
What are you...
**[12:22] (Flashback) Obo**
Forgive me.
**[12:24] (Flashback) Obo**
I can't even die as your target of revenge.
**[12:28] (Flashback) Obo**
So I hope you at least
**[12:31] (Flashback) Obo**
live and continue to hate me forever.
**[12:39] Obo**
*Back then, I died.*
**[12:43] Obo**
*I decided to dedicate everything to him.*
**[12:47] Obo**
* I was an insect fated to die like a slave,*
* with no one to grieve for me.*
**[12:53] Obo**
* So I decided to serve him until I shed*
* all the blood that kept me alive.*
**[12:59] (Flashback) U**
I told you to leave once your wounds healed.
**[13:02] (Flashback) U**
We took your home away from you.
**[13:05] (Flashback) U**
That said, if you stay here,
**[13:08] (Flashback) U**
you'll end up a killer.
**[13:10] (Flashback) Obo**
Please teach me.
**[13:12] (Flashback) Obo**
I'm willing to do anything to help you.
**[13:16] (Flashback) U**
I'm no teacher.
**[13:18] (Flashback) Obo**
In my eyes, you're a teacher who I owe
my life to. One who deserves respect.
**[13:22] (Flashback) U**
That's not something you say
to a leader of assassins.
**[13:25] (Flashback) U**
I cannot offer anyone anything.
**[13:29] (Flashback) U**
In fact, I wish I could be one of the
children, and learn along with them...
**[13:34] (Flashback) U**
How to clean my bloodstained hands.
**[13:39] (Flashback) Obo**
In that case, how about
running a school yourself?
**[13:42] (Flashback) Obo**
A school where a teacher and
his students learn together...
**[13:45] (Flashback) Obo**
That sounds wonderful.
**[13:47] (Flashback) U**
Who would join a school run by a murderer?
**[13:52] (Flashback) U**
All I can teach anyone
are techniques to kill.
**[13:56] (Flashback) Obo**
But you refuse to teach me those.
**[13:59] (Flashback) Obo**
If you truly were evil,
I'd already be a killer by now.
**[14:05] (Flashback) Obo**
I'll give up on learning killing techniques,
**[14:08] (Flashback) Obo**
so make me your first student
at that school, okay?
**[14:23] (Flashback) G**
The chief has run away.
**[14:25] (Flashback) G**
As you know, quitting is
not an option for us.
**[14:28] (Flashback) G**
He must be dealt with.
**[14:32] (Flashback) Sho**
Oh? Did you finally decide
to leave that place?
**[14:36] (Flashback) Obo**
Sensei!
**[14:37] (Flashback) Obo**
What are you fooling around for?!
**[14:40] (Flashback) Sho**
I couldn't lure you outside
without doing this much.
**[14:44] (Flashback) Sho**
If I want to get you out of the group,
**[14:47] (Flashback) Sho**
the best way to do it is by leaving.
**[14:50] (Flashback) Obo**
Sensei, you can't mean...
**[14:52] (Flashback) Sho**
No. I've been plotting
this since before you came.
**[14:57] (Flashback) Sho**
But it may have been thanks to you
that I finally made up my mind.
**[15:01] (Flashback) Sho**
I may bear sins that won't
go away even after death,
**[15:04] (Flashback) Sho**
but I can keep atoning for
them as long as I live.
**[15:08] (Flashback) Sho**
I will fight, too,
**[15:10] (Flashback) Sho**
with the reaper within me.
**[15:11] (Flashback) Obo**
B-But...
**[15:14] (Flashback) Obo**
You'll be targeted because of me.
**[15:17] (Flashback) Sho**
That goes for you, too.
**[15:19] (Flashback) Sho**
If anyone even considers you
a member of Naraku, that is.
**[15:23] (Flashback) Sho**
But I will make you one of my own.
**[15:51] (Flashback) Obo**
Shoka Sonjuku?
**[15:53] (Flashback) Obo**
What's that supposed to be?
**[15:54] (Flashback) Sho**
The name of the school.
**[15:56] (Flashback) Obo**
What does it mean?
**[15:58] (Flashback) Sho**
A school born under a pine tree...
**[16:01] (Flashback) Sho**
Just now.
**[16:02] (Flashback) Sho**
Right now, it's just you and me,
**[16:05] (Flashback) Sho**
but I hope many more will join
us under this pine tree one day,
**[16:09] (Flashback) Sho**
and that you'll have many junior students.
**[16:13] (Flashback) Obo**
Junior students?
**[16:14] (Flashback) Sho**
Yes.
**[16:15] (Flashback) Sho**
In Naraku, you were the weakest,
**[16:18] (Flashback) Sho**
but from now on, you'll be
the most advanced student.
**[16:20] (Flashback) Sho**
We both need to do our best.
**[16:24] (Flashback) Obo**
Y-Yes.
**[16:28] (Flashback) Obo**
Junior students, huh?
**[16:30] (Flashback) Obo**
I can't wait to see them.
**[16:37] (Flashback) Obo**
*There's no escape.*
**[16:39] (Flashback) Obo**
*Not even for Sensei,*
**[16:41] (Flashback) Obo**
*if he takes me along.*
**[16:45] (Flashback) Sho**
This is a trap to delay your pursuers.
**[16:47] (Flashback) Sho**
You must never use it to kill.
**[17:06] (Flashback) G**
Aren't you the chief's page?
**[17:08] (Flashback) G**
Hey!
**[17:09] (Flashback) G**
What happened?
**[17:12] (Flashback) Obo**
I helped him escape...
**[17:16] (Flashback) Obo**
But once he found out how
many were after him,
**[17:20] (Flashback) Obo**
he cut me off, saying I'd hold him back.
**[17:22] (Flashback) G**
Which way did he go?
**[17:28] (Flashback) G**
Wait.
**[17:29] (Flashback) G**
This certainly is the chief's sword.
**[17:32] (Flashback) G**
But why are you alive, then?
**[17:37] (Flashback) G**
If he decided to kill
someone, he'd never fail.
**[17:40] (Flashback) G**
Especially not a brat like you.
**[17:49] (Flashback) Obo**
He didn't fail to kill me.
**[17:51] (Flashback) Obo**
He just chose not to.
**[17:54] (Flashback) Obo**
Sensei won't kill anyone anymore.
**[17:58] (Flashback) Obo**
And I'll make sure he never has to.
**[18:06] (Flashback) Obo**
*Sensei,*
**[18:07] (Flashback) Obo**
*I'm really sorry.*
**[18:10] (Flashback) Obo**
*I broke our promise.*
**[18:12] (Flashback) Obo**
*I decided that, since you saved me,
my life didn't belong to myself.*
**[18:15] (Flashback) Obo**
*That I would use it for your sake.*
**[18:19] (Flashback) Obo**
*If I can't protect your ideal,*
**[18:22] (Flashback) Obo**
*if I can't protect the junior
students I have yet to meet,*
**[18:25] (Flashback) Obo**
*how can I call myself your first student?*
**[18:29] (Flashback) Obo**
*Sensei, I know our school,*
**[18:33] (Flashback) Obo**
*Shoka Sonjuku, will...*
**[18:39] Obo**
*Apparently, he thought I was dead,*
**[18:43] Obo**
*but his blood coursing through my body*
**[18:46] Obo**
*told me to live and continue to serve him.*
**[18:52] Obo**
*Having covered up my betrayal,*
**[18:54] Obo**
* I strove to keep Naraku's*
* fangs away from Sensei.*
**[18:58] Obo**
* I went against his teachings and didn't*
* hesitate to dirty my hands with blood.*
**[19:03] Obo**
* I didn't mind, even though*
* I wasn't by his side,*
**[19:06] Obo**
* if it meant I could protect*
* him and his ideal...*
**[19:09] Obo**
*That's what I thought.*
**[19:32] Obo**
*That's what I thought...*
**[19:35] Obo**
*Or so I thought.*
**[19:47] Obo**
I'm the one who got him captured.
**[19:52] Obo**
Even so...
**[19:55] Obo**
Even so,
**[19:59] Obo**
I believed he would come back.
**[20:03] Obo**
You and I are the same.
**[20:06] Obo**
We lost our teacher due to our weakness.
**[20:09] Obo**
*One swore to never betray him again.*
**[20:16] Obo**
*The other swore*
**[20:18] Obo**
* to bring him back, even if it*
* meant having to kill him again.*
**[20:26] Obo**
* Until the spirit your teacher*
* gave you completely dies out,*
**[20:29] Obo**
*keep fighting.*
**[20:31] Obo**
*That's what we...*
**[20:33] Obo**
*Yoshida Shoyo's students are all about.*
**[20:39] (Flashback) Obo**
Come out. It's time.
**[20:45] (Flashback) Sho**
Can you pass on my last words
**[20:47] (Flashback) Sho**
to my students?
**[20:50] (Flashback) Sho**
Without you, I never would've
gotten to meet them.
**[20:54] (Flashback) Sho**
Without you, I never would've
become Yoshida Shoyo.
**[20:59] (Flashback) Sho**
Thank you.
**[21:00] (Flashback) Sho**
And I'm sorry.
**[21:04] (Flashback) Sho**
If possible, I would've loved
to bring you together.
**[21:07] (Flashback) Sho**
Those kids,
**[21:10] (Flashback) Sho**
and my pride and joy, my first student.
**[21:19] Obo**
I have seen with my own eyes, Sensei,
**[21:23] Obo**
my junior students I'm so proud of.
**[21:31] Obo**
It dried up, huh?
**[21:34] Obo**
This blood has dried up, at last...
**[21:39] Obo**
Now I can finally go back.
**[21:42] Obo**
It's been so long...
**[21:44] Obo**
But this pain is nothing.
**[21:47] Obo**
Compared to your eternal suffering,
**[21:50] Obo**
my suffering must be no more than
the fleeting pain of a needle prick.
**[21:57] Obo**
Hear me, Takasugi.
**[22:01] Obo**
Rather than Utsuro's minion,
**[22:03] Obo**
there's something I must tell you
as Yoshida Shoyo's first student...
**[22:11] Obo**
Just what Yoshida Shoyo...
**[22:14] Obo**
What Utsuro is.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 12
**[23:49] Obo**
Put an end to him before
everything is all over.
***SIGN*** Hope
**[23:53] Obo**
The Battle on Rakuyo Arc that
took us into a late night slot,
**[23:53] ---**
and even into outer space,
is nearing its end!
**[23:59] Obo**
Also, there'll be a major
announcement next week!!!
**[23:59] ---**
Be sure you stay tuned to
Gintama until the end!
# 328 - Hope
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:07] Obo**
There's something I must tell you.
**[00:11] Obo**
Just what Yoshida Shoyo...
**[00:13] Obo**
What Utsuro is.
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo Arc
Part 12
***SIGN*** Hope
***SIGN*** Watch the Battle on Rakuyo arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:57] Hen**
Oboro, the chief of Tenshoin Naraku,
**[02:00] Hen**
was Yoshida Shoyo's first and last student.
**[02:05] Hen**
Utsuro, the previous chief,
met Oboro and became Shoyo.
**[02:10] Hen**
And he died as Shoyo because of Oboro.
**[02:14] Hen**
That's how that man came to be.
**[02:18] Hen**
Or should I say, came back to life?
**[02:23] (Flashback) D**
Altana mutants?
**[02:26] (Flashback) D**
It can't be!
**[02:27] (Flashback) D**
There's no doubt.
**[02:28] (Flashback) D**
That man is immortal.
**[02:32] (Flashback) T**
Utsuro.
**[02:33] (Flashback) T**
Or would you prefer I
called you Yoshida Shoyo?
**[02:37] (Flashback) T**
When and where did you gain that ability?
**[02:43] (Flashback) U**
Utsuro.
**[02:44] (Flashback) U**
Yoshida Shoyo.
**[02:47] (Flashback) U**
I'm both of those and
neither at the same time.
**[02:51] (Flashback) U**
One that has lived within this body for
so long, I've forgotten my very name.
**[02:58] (Flashback) U**
No, maybe I never had a name to begin with.
**[03:03] (Flashback) U**
I was only showered with
endless insults and hostility.
**[03:09] (Flashback) U**
And the only name I remember is...
**[03:11] Hen**
Devil.
**[03:14] (Flashback) Sho**
I came here after hearing
about a corpse-eating devil,
**[03:18] (Flashback) Sho**
but you're awfully adorable for a devil.
**[03:22] Hen**
It seems people persecuted Utsuro
due to their fear of his immortality.
**[03:27] Obo**
Chopped into pieces, skewered, and burned,
**[03:31] Obo**
he died over and over again.
**[03:39] Obo**
But he came back to life each time,
**[03:41] Obo**
inspiring further fear and animosity.
**[03:45] Obo**
Even though he experienced suffering
that would break anyone's spirit,
**[03:52] Obo**
he couldn't disappear.
**[03:55] Obo**
That is why he gave birth,
**[03:57] Obo**
in order to overcome the endless suffering...
**[04:01] (Flashback) U**
To countless versions of me.
**[04:04] (Flashback) U**
And by the time the prison
itself rotted away,
**[04:14] (Flashback) U**
they began to act.
**[04:23] (Flashback) U**
To bestow countless deaths upon people.
**[04:27] (Flashback) U**
They did to others what
others had done unto them,
**[04:31] (Flashback) U**
like a devil trying to become
human by imitating them.
**[04:42] (Flashback) U**
And so, they were granted
the mask of the reaper.
**[04:48] (Flashback) U**
The court chose to use the
reaper for their own benefit.
**[04:52] (Flashback) U**
The 500 years after that were spent
in a maelstrom of bloodshed.
**[04:57] (Flashback) U**
The one that hated humans,
**[04:59] (Flashback) U**
the one that feared humans,
**[05:01] (Flashback) U**
and the one that longed to be human...
**[05:03] (Flashback) U**
They were all me.
**[05:07] (Flashback) U**
It was inevitable that he
would appear to stop them.
**[05:15] (Flashback) U**
The only Utsuro that stood up to Utsuro.
**[05:21] (Flashback) U**
That was Yoshida Shoyo.
**[05:25] (Flashback) U**
He suppressed the countless
incarnations of me
**[05:29] (Flashback) U**
and fought to change.
**[05:32] (Flashback) U**
He never stopped fighting.
**[05:37] (Flashback) U**
However...
**[05:45] (Flashback) U**
You're the only one left now,
**[05:49] (Flashback) U**
Shoyo.
**[05:51] (Flashback) U**
You don't need to suffer anymore.
**[05:53] (Flashback) U**
I'll put an end to it all.
**[06:06] (Flashback) U**
Farewell, me.
**[06:23] (Flashback) T**
So what you seek is an end for yourself?
**[06:29] (Flashback) T**
That's a shame.
**[06:31] (Flashback) T**
If your power were used wisely,
**[06:34] (Flashback) T**
we—this universe—could
evolve even further.
**[06:37] (Flashback) U**
If you'll find a way to kill me,
**[06:41] (Flashback) U**
I don't mind if you chop this body up and
investigate every last drop of blood.
**[06:48] (Flashback) U**
But just keep this in mind:
**[06:51] (Flashback) U**
I'm a man who doesn't
know how to end himself,
**[06:55] (Flashback) U**
but I do know how to rip my
arms from these shackles
**[06:58] (Flashback) U**
and put an end to this
stupid game right now.
**[07:04] (Flashback) U**
I know how to put an end to
others better than anyone.
**[07:08] (Flashback) U**
And, if one seeks the power of immortality,
**[07:12] (Flashback) U**
I know how to grant it to them, too.
**[07:15] (Flashback) U**
You needn't resort to these measures.
**[07:17] (Flashback) U**
I would gladly cooperate with you.
**[07:20] (Flashback) U**
But, in return, grant me power.
**[07:24] (Flashback) U**
Power that can destroy me.
**[07:30] Obo**
The Tendoshu feared him.
**[07:34] Hen**
They gave him rank and honor,
but not power or authority.
**[07:38] Hen**
Utsuro sought the privilege that only the
Tendoshu possess in all the universe:
**[07:45] Hen**
the power to freely control
each planet's Altana.
**[07:49] Hen**
What makes that possible is a seal
on the palm, known as the "key."
**[07:54] Hen**
It is bestowed as a proof of authority
upon the highest-level executives alone,
**[07:58] Hen**
and it acts as a code that can
open and close Altana gates.
**[08:02] Hen**
Nobody knows how it's made,
**[08:04] Hen**
but it is impossible to remove once engraved,
**[08:08] Hen**
and ripping it off can prove fatal.
**[08:11] Hen**
And when the wielder dies,
the key disappears with them.
**[08:14] Hen**
One needs the unanimous approval of
the Tendoshu to procure the key,
**[08:19] Hen**
so Utsuro cannot control Altana.
**[08:23] Hen**
Or so it was thought.
**[08:26] T**
Something terrible happened
while you were away.
**[08:30] T**
Planet Tanko's Altana went berserk.
**[08:34] T**
The gate and terminal were blown
to smithereens instantly.
**[08:37] T**
Our branch there was destroyed, too.
**[08:39] T**
The damage caused is believed
to be unprecedented.
**[08:42] U**
What led to that accident?
**[08:44] T**
It was no accident.
**[08:46] T**
Just before it happened,
we received a report
**[08:49] T**
that unidentified forces
were attacking the gate.
**[08:54] T**
It was clearly an act of
rebellion against us.
**[08:58] T**
So it was induced by man?
**[09:00] T**
The only ones capable of such a thing are...
**[09:03] T**
Yes, none but the Tendoshu
who possess the key.
**[09:09] T**
You're saying there's a traitor?
**[09:12] T**
But where could they find
soldiers who'd obey them?
**[09:17] T**
True, any land that possesses
a gate is under our control.
**[09:23] T**
But what if it was a force that
didn't belong to any land?
**[09:27] T**
Like the pirate fleet you
just took over, for example.
**[09:32] T**
The goal of your trip was to
gain control of the Harusame
**[09:36] T**
and wipe out any rebels.
**[09:39] T**
But what if half of them were used
to achieve a different goal?
**[09:45] T**
What if you used that whole battle
to lull us into a sense of security?
**[09:49] T**
What if making Altana go berserk
**[09:52] T**
and destroying the planet
was your true objective?
**[09:59] T**
How did you steal a key?
**[10:06] U**
I didn't steal anything.
**[10:08] U**
I only gave away,
**[10:11] U**
as you people wished,
**[10:13] U**
my immortal blood.
**[10:15] U**
And you people willingly parted with a great
number of things to gain immortality.
**[10:20] U**
The key, which causes death upon being
stolen and disappears upon dying,
**[10:27] U**
just became an indestructible key.
**[10:29] U**
I only picked up a key you people dropped.
**[10:34] T**
Wh-Who was it that handed
over their key to him?!
**[10:37] U**
My blood is certainly that of an immortal,
**[10:41] U**
but it only functions as it should
within an immortal's body.
**[10:44] U**
Your bodies aren't immortal,
**[10:46] U**
so infusing my blood is akin to pouring
magma into a frail container.
**[10:50] U**
What's more, you poured it until
the vessel was overflowing.
**[10:55] U**
The vessel is sure to start melting.
**[10:57] U**
It won't just be your arms.
**[10:58] U**
Soon, your legs will fall off,
**[11:01] U**
and so will your head.
**[11:02] U**
But even as your mind experiences
suffering that could break anyone,
**[11:07] U**
you can't die.
**[11:09] U**
You won't end until your body rots away.
**[11:14] T**
Utsuro, you bastard!
**[11:15] T**
You said there was a way to save
me if I offered you the key!
**[11:19] T**
Are you going back on your word?!
**[11:23] T**
Impossible... There were so many traitors?
**[11:28] T**
Wait, then the keys you took...
**[11:30] U**
I have lots more of them.
**[11:33] U**
You should receive reports soon
**[11:36] U**
about how for every key you dropped,
**[11:49] U**
an entire planet was destroyed.
**[11:52] U**
And the people who survived will swear
**[11:55] U**
that they'll never forgive the Tendoshu.
**[12:00] U**
That you can't be left
in control of the gates.
**[12:03] U**
They will eventually come here,
**[12:04] U**
to Earth.
**[12:06] T**
Are you trying to start a war
with the entire universe?!
**[12:10] U**
I'm a monster that Earth created.
**[12:13] U**
As long as I consume the Altana
of this planet, I cannot die.
**[12:18] U**
My suffering, your suffering,
**[12:22] U**
and all the suffering
repeated on this planet
**[12:26] U**
will never end as long as this planet exists.
**[12:30] U**
Then we need only put an end
**[12:33] U**
to this planet.
**[12:35] Obo**
Wresting control of Altana
from the Tendoshu's clutches
**[12:40] Obo**
to cause a universal war.
**[12:43] Obo**
That is his goal.
**[12:46] Obo**
Fighters, take down Utsuro.
**[12:51] Obo**
Yoshida Shoyo fought the Utsuro
within himself and lost.
**[12:57] Obo**
But his battle gave birth to you.
**[13:01] Obo**
His spirit still lives on.
**[13:04] Obo**
Put an end to him, before everything ends.
**[13:11] Obo**
Don't hesitate.
**[13:12] Obo**
Don't be afraid.
**[13:15] Obo**
Fight as your heart wills you to.
**[13:18] Obo**
Since I lost sight of my own spirit,
**[13:24] Obo**
I couldn't fight for Sensei, that man,
**[13:27] Obo**
or for myself.
**[13:32] Obo**
If I could do it all over again...
**[13:39] Obo**
I...
**[13:47] Obo**
I...
**[14:05] Obo**
I would've loved to be one of you guys...
**[14:34] Tak**
Let's go.
**[14:36] Tak**
This is not his rightful resting place.
**[14:40] Tak**
Though who knows whether it'll be next
to his master or next to us students.
**[14:48] Tak**
We're going back to Shoka Sonjuku.
**[15:03] Sak**
Gintoki, Zura...
**[15:06] Gin**
Nothing anyone says is going
to surprise me anymore.
**[15:10] Gin**
None of it changes anything.
**[15:12] Gin**
Maybe Utsuro was the one who
killed the Shoyo persona.
**[15:18] Gin**
But we, his students, were the ones who
cornered him, giving Utsuro his chance.
**[15:26] Gin**
The one who ignored his
request not to go after him,
**[15:30] Gin**
started a fight that put
his friends in danger,
**[15:33] Gin**
and gave Shoyo the final blow
that awakened Utsuro was me.
**[15:39] Gin**
We were the ones who killed
Shoyo and gave birth to Utsuro.
**[15:47] Gin**
Even so,
**[15:49] Gin**
back then...
**[15:52] (Flashback) Sho**
Thank you.
**[15:55] Gin**
That's what he said.
**[15:57] Gin**
With total disregard for his
impending death, he looked at me
**[16:01] Gin**
and smiled.
**[16:05] Kat**
Perhaps Sensei always
knew this would happen.
**[16:10] Kat**
That, someday, the monster within him
**[16:12] Kat**
would consume him and become a massive
shadow that would destroy entire planets.
**[16:19] Kat**
And maybe Shoka Sonjuku was created to give
the world hope to fight that darkness.
**[16:31] (Flashback) Sho**
A monster's sword cannot
cut another monster.
**[16:35] (Flashback) Sho**
You have to grow stronger
than me using your own sword,
**[16:38] (Flashback) Sho**
the sword of a human.
**[16:41] Kat**
Even as he faced death,
**[16:46] Kat**
there wasn't a hint of fear
or sorrow in his eyes.
**[16:53] Kat**
You, who were willing to walk
over your teacher's corpse
**[16:57] Kat**
in order to protect Shoka
Sonjuku and its spirit,
**[17:00] Kat**
appeared to him as a great ray of hope.
**[17:04] Kat**
That must be why he,
**[17:06] Kat**
and you,
**[17:07] Kat**
smiled back then.
**[17:12] Sak**
The battles of the man called Yoshida
Shoyo gave birth to you guys.
**[17:17] Sak**
And your battles gave birth
to us and our comrades.
**[17:23] Sak**
There's more than one ray of hope now.
**[17:26] Sak**
Let's see what all our
battles will give birth to
**[17:29] Sak**
and show it off to the two Yoshida Shoyos!
**[17:47] UB**
Are you going?
**[17:49] UB**
To a planet that might be destroyed soon?
**[17:52] UB**
Actually, should I ask if you're going home?
**[17:57] UB**
That's what that planet has
become to you now, hasn't it?
**[18:03] UB**
I'd like to stop you,
**[18:05] UB**
but I'd rather not be the kind of father
**[18:08] UB**
who whines to a daughter he
married off to another planet.
**[18:11] Kag**
Who're you saying got married off?
**[18:17] UB**
Could you pass on a message to him?
**[18:20] UB**
"Utsuro is not immortal."
**[18:24] UB**
"There is a way to kill him."
**[18:28] UB**
"Hang in there until I find out what it is."
**[18:31] UB**
"If anything happens to my daughter,
I'll kill you along with Utsuro."
**[18:35] Kag**
Daddy...
**[18:37] UB**
Your mother shooed me away, you see.
**[18:40] UB**
"You have neither the right nor
any arms to punch our children,
**[18:44] UB**
but you still have a job to do," she said.
**[18:49] UB**
I don't know what exactly
that is yet, but...
**[18:53] UB**
Even with these arms, I could at
least pick up rocks off the ground.
**[18:58] UB**
I could at least pick flowers for her.
**[19:04] Kag**
Those weren't the flowers Mommy liked.
**[19:06] UB**
Quit nitpicking.
**[19:08] UB**
Flowers are all the same.
**[19:11] UB**
But I'm amazed you remembered that.
**[19:13] Kag**
I only remembered when I saw that, too.
**[19:21] Kag**
I still have a job to do, huh?
**[19:58] Shin**
*The land of the samurai.*
**[20:00] Shin**
* There was a time, long ago, when our*
* country was called by that name.*
**[20:05] Shin**
* Those dream-filled blue skies upon*
* which the samurai once gazed*
**[20:09] Shin**
* are now filled with ships*
* from strange worlds.*
**[20:11] Shin**
* The towns where the samurai*
* once proudly walked*
**[20:15] Shin**
* are now filled with swaggering,*
* arrogant aliens.*
**[20:18] Shin**
*We were stripped of our swords and status,*
**[20:20] Shin**
*and we lost our honor and everything else.*
**[20:23] Shin**
*However, even so,*
**[20:27] Shin**
*the samurai spirit is still alive here.*
**[20:37] Shin**
*Our final battle is about to begin.*
# 329 - The Stairs to Adulthood May Not Always Lead Up
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** The Story So Far
**[00:08] Shin**
*The land of the samurai.*
**[00:10] Shin**
* There was a time, long ago, when our*
* country was called by that name.*
**[00:16] Shin**
* Now, the world has entered*
* a Great Pirate Era!*
**[00:19] Shin**
* By a twist of fate, our hero Gin-san ate*
* a Wave Wave Fruit, gained a perm,*
**[00:23] Shin**
*decided to solve all his problems with money,*
**[00:25] Shin**
* and left on a journey to find*
* the Pirate King's treasure.*
***SIGN*** Boom!
**[00:28] Gin**
I'm gonna be the king of the nouveau rich!
**[00:30] Shin**
*On his travels,*
**[00:31] ---**
* he met a girl looking for seven balls*
* that can summon a shining dragon:*
**[00:34] ---**
*the genius beauty Kagura-chan.*
**[00:36] Kag**
I'll let you feel all the romance.
**[00:38] Shin**
* On the way, they also picked*
* up a glasses monster.*
**[00:41] Shin**
Shinpachu!
**[00:42] Kag**
Wow, you must be a glasses Friend!
**[00:46] Gin**
Hey, Shinpachu, bring out the
Japari Bus. I'm tired of walking.
**[00:49] Shin**
*They all worked together,*
**[00:53] Shin**
*defeated the terrifying evil overlord,*
***SIGN*** Two Years Later...
**[00:55] Shin**
*and two years later,*
**[00:58] Shin**
* the three of them reunited*
* at the Jabondy Archipelago*
***SIGN*** World Chunin Hunter Hero Exam
**[01:00] Shin**
* and were about to take the World*
* Chunin Hunter Hero Exam...*
**[01:06] Shin**
Are you kidding me?
**[01:07] Shin**
What the hell is this recap?!
**[01:09] Gin**
Y'know, we've been doing a bunch of
long arcs, reruns, and breaks lately,
**[01:13] Gin**
so I wrote that, figuring we should
casually look back on the story.
**[01:17] Shin**
You casually filled it with lies!
**[01:18] Shin**
And you ripped off too many series!
**[01:20] Kag**
Roughly put, the story did
go something like that.
**[01:23] Kag**
In the last long arc, for example,
we went to another planet out in space
**[01:27] Kag**
and fought a combat race whose strong
emotions awakened their powers.
**[01:32] Shin**
Uh, that is somewhat right, but...
**[01:34] Shin**
Hell, you were basically the star of that arc.
Sure you wanna sum it up that way?
**[01:39] Shin**
Listen up.
**[01:41] Shin**
We didn't learn the Whateverhameha
or become Whatever Masters.
**[01:45] Shin**
We're not headed for the
Whatever Line, either!
***SIGN*** Shogun Assassination
***SIGN*** Farewell Shinsengumi
**[01:47] Shin**
We were originally supposed to
enter the final long arc now,
***SIGN*** Battle on Rakuyo
***SIGN*** Final Arc?
**[01:52] Shin**
but stuff happened, and now we're here.
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
**[01:54] Shin**
Gin-san, you're basically a guy
with a perm and dead fish eyes.
***SIGN*** Kabuki District First
**[01:57] Shin**
You run an odd jobs business
in Edo's Kabuki District.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[02:00] Shin**
Kagura-chan, you're one of
the Yato, a combat race,
**[02:03] Shin**
a glutton, and you always carry an umbrella.
**[02:05] Shin**
And I, Shinpachi,
**[02:07] Shin**
am Suda Masaki in 3D.
**[02:10] Bo**
How long are you gonna keep talking
about the live-action movie?
**[02:13] Gin**
Enough with the Suda nonsense!
No more Granbluing!
**[02:17] Kag**
Y'know, the more you do that,
the more miserable you'll be.
**[02:20] Kag**
Open your eyes!
**[02:21] Shin**
But I have to ride this wave and
get myself a hottie image!
**[02:25] Kag**
What others do doesn't matter to us!
**[02:27] Gin**
Come on! Let's start the anime already!
**[02:29] Bo**
Okay...
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[04:01] UB**
Yeah, the sunshine on Earth
is too much to handle.
**[04:06] UB**
I feel like I'm going bald.
**[04:09] UB**
Earth really isn't a planet
we Yato are meant to live on.
**[04:14] UB**
Kagura-chan said it didn't bother her,
but will she really be okay?
**[04:19] UB**
Sure, she may be fine now,
**[04:21] UB**
but what if staying here too
long affects her body—
**[04:24] G**
Hey, check that out.
**[04:26] G**
That old dude's got an umbrella
even though it ain't raining.
**[04:29] G**
He should probably get some sun
and photosynthesize or something.
**[04:33] G**
It'd help his head.
**[04:34] UB**
Hey!
**[04:37] UB**
What in the world happened to you two?
**[04:38] UB**
Your entire body is toasted!
**[04:40] Punk**
What do you think you're doing, old man?
**[04:42] UB**
Hang in there! I'll call an ambulance now!
**[04:45] G**
No, call the cops instead!
**[04:46] G**
Somebody help!
**[04:49] UB**
*This planet really is dangerous.*
**[04:52] UB**
*If Kagura-chan stays here, someday...*
**[04:55] UB**
* Her whole body might end up toasted, and*
* she might bring home a toasted boyfriend.*
**[05:00] TB**
We're already expecting.
**[05:03] UB**
* There might be a new toasted*
* life growing in her womb.*
**[05:06] UB**
* We'd have no choice but to throw*
* a shotgun wedding in the shadows.*
**[05:11] UB**
* But in a matter of months,*
* her married life would be toast.*
**[05:15] TB**
It's all burned!
**[05:18] UB**
* Unable to fend for herself and her*
* child as a single toast mother...*
**[05:23] Kag**
Oh dear, mister. Your whole body's so toasted.
**[05:27] UB**
*She'd start working at a shady shop.*
**[05:29] UB**
* Eventually, even her heart*
* would be toasted black, and...*
**[05:33] Cop**
We found a burned, toasted will.
***SIGN*** Forgive me, Daddy.
**[05:39] UB**
I won't stand for it!
**[05:40] UB**
Daddy will not accept toast of any sort!
**[05:44] UB**
If you stay here, everything will be toast!
**[05:47] UB**
I'm gonna take her back before
everything becomes toast!
**[05:50] G**
Hey, sir.
***SIGN*** Hair Growth Powder
Toasty
A magical way to hide your hair loss
Free Trial Period
**[05:52] G**
We're running a free trial period right now.
**[05:55] G**
Would you like to try it?
**[05:56] G**
One spray, and your head
will be a toasty black.
**[05:59] UB**
I won't stand for it!
**[06:01] UB**
Only Daddy's head needs to be toasty!
**[06:04] UB**
That's enough! Daddy has
enough hair on his head!
**[06:07] UB**
Be it Daddy's hair or your life
here on Earth, this is plenty!
**[06:11] UB**
You should say goodbye
to this rotten place...
**[06:15] UB**
*That's Kagura-chan.*
**[06:18] UB**
* Thank goodness. Looks like*
* she's not toasted yet.*
***SIGN*** Kagura-chan
**[06:23] Boy**
Um, here.
**[06:29] Boy**
You can give me your answer some other time.
**[06:32] Boy**
Bye.
**[06:32] Kag**
Hey, wait.
**[06:35] Kag**
What is this?
**[06:38] Kag**
Let's see...
**[06:39] Kag**
Dear Kagura-chan...
***SIGN*** Dear Kagura-chan, Ever since we first met, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you.
**[06:41] Kag**
Ever since we first met, I haven't
been able to stop thinking about you."
**[06:45] Kag**
All this while, I've played with
you like you were one of the guys,
***SIGN*** Road Safety
Be careful up ahead!!
**[06:49] Kag**
but I can't suppress these feelings anymore.
**[06:52] Kag**
Please go out with me.
**[06:56] Kag**
My heart is
**[06:59] Kag**
burning with such passionate love for you
**[07:07] Kag**
that it is now toasted pitch-black.
***SIGN*** The Stairs to Adulthood
May Not Always Lead Up
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[07:18] Shin**
Hey!
**[07:19] Shin**
What the heck is this? What happened?
**[07:22] Gin**
Pachi-boy, I asked you to get me a spoon.
**[07:26] Gin**
If you're giving me such a massive spoon,
give me a massive serving of pudding, too.
**[07:30] UB**
I assume you're okay with that...
**[07:32] UB**
as your last supper.
**[07:37] UB**
You're okay with that?
**[07:38] Shin**
U-Umibozu-san?
**[07:40] Gin**
Oh, Pops. If you'd told us you were coming,
**[07:44] Gin**
we would've got another pudding for you.
**[07:46] Gin**
Did you go out of your way to get your own
**[07:49] Gin**
shiny pudding?
**[07:51] UB**
My head is not shiny pudding!
**[07:52] Gin**
Why are you so cranky pudding as soon
as you get here? Aren't you being rude?
**[07:57] UB**
I don't wanna hear that from a guy
who keeps calling my head pudding!
**[08:01] UB**
You were supposed to look after my precious
daughter! What were you looking at?
**[08:06] UB**
This is the height of negligence!
**[08:09] Shin**
Huh? Did something happen to Kagura-chan?
**[08:12] Kag**
I'm home!
**[08:14] Kag**
Huh? You're here, Daddy?
**[08:16] Kag**
Long time no see.
**[08:17] UB**
Kagura!
**[08:18] Kag**
Perfect timing. I've got good
news to share with you all.
**[08:22] UB**
No! I don't wanna hear it!
**[08:25] Kag**
I have a boyfriend now.
**[08:31] UB**
*Wait a second.*
**[08:32] UB**
*Not "I got a love letter"?*
**[08:34] UB**
*"Boyfriend"?*
**[08:36] Kag**
We're going on a date tomorrow.
**[08:38] Kag**
What should I wear?
**[08:43] Gin**
Uh, Shinpachi...
**[08:46] Gin**
What's a "boyfriend" again?
**[08:48] Gin**
Like these things?
**[08:49] Shin**
No, that's a dry limb.
**[08:51] Shin**
"Dry limb" and "boyfriend" barely sound alike.
**[08:53] Gin**
Like this, then?
**[08:54] Shin**
Uh, that's "boyfriend death."
***SIGN*** Boyfriend DEATH
**[08:56] Shin**
Get away from the tree
already. Just take the guy.
**[08:59] Gin**
Oh, so like this?
**[09:00] Shin**
Why'd you turn it into
Chris's evolution chart?
**[09:02] Shin**
He just evolved from dry
limbs to more dry limbs!
**[09:07] UB**
How could this be?
**[09:08] UB**
He said he'd wait for his answer,
but she gave it to him so quickly?
**[09:12] UB**
And she said okay?!
**[09:14] UB**
What're you gonna do about this?
**[09:16] UB**
This wouldn't have happened
if you'd kept an eye on her!
**[09:19] Gin**
Calm down. This has to be some bad joke.
**[09:22] Gin**
Kagura, of all people,
could never get a boyfriend.
**[09:25] UB**
You're right.
**[09:26] UB**
This has to be some kind of
bad joke or bad dream, right?
**[09:29] Gin**
Exactly.
**[09:30] Gin**
Who'd fall for that vulgar, gluttonous
mass with no sex appeal—that hurloine?
**[09:35] Gin**
She probably just got Punk'd or something.
**[09:37] Gin**
She's your daughter. She inherited
all your unlucky genes.
**[09:39] Gin**
Have more faith in her.
**[09:40] UB**
You're right!
**[09:41] UB**
This couldn't happen to a girl who
was swimming in my filthy b*lls...
**[09:45] UB**
Who're you calling a filthy b*ll girl?!
**[09:47] Gin**
I never went that far.
**[09:49] Gin**
Please, cool off your b*ll head for a sec.
**[09:52] Gin**
Don't worry. This can't be real.
**[09:54] Shin**
You never know.
**[09:57] Shin**
I've heard that even grade
schoolers are dating these days.
**[10:00] Shin**
And while Kagura-chan may look
childish, she's fourteen.
**[10:04] Shin**
Besides, if you go just
by looks, she's a beauty.
**[10:08] Shin**
Considering all that—
**[10:10] UB**
Hey, what do you mean, grade schoolers?
**[10:14] UB**
Has this planet gotten that dirty?
***SIGN*** Earth
**[10:17] UB**
Earth?
**[10:18] UB**
More like Dirth!
***SIGN*** Dirth
**[10:20] UB**
Can I destroy it now?
**[10:23] UB**
Can I get serious now?
**[10:25] Shin**
Please calm down.
**[10:27] Shin**
I called it "dating," but they're just playing.
**[10:29] Shin**
It's all just a game!
**[10:30] Gin**
Hey...
**[10:32] Gin**
What do you mean, it's just a game?
**[10:34] Shin**
Not you, too!
**[10:35] Gin**
Don't tell me they satisfy their urges,
**[10:37] Gin**
wrap the girl with paper from their Japonica
Notebooks, and chuck her in the trash.
**[10:41] Gin**
If they do that,
**[10:43] Gin**
can I stick jet packs in their backpacks and
pitch them to the edge of the galaxy?
**[10:47] Gin**
Can I turn them into the
backpack constellation?
**[10:50] Shin**
Calm down, both of you!
**[10:52] Shin**
I'm just speaking hypothetically!
**[10:54] Shin**
You're getting too worked up!
**[10:55] Shin**
Also, if you're so bothered by it, you
could just ask Kagura-chan directly!
**[11:01] UB**
Y-You go.
**[11:04] Gin**
Why me? Aren't you her father?
**[11:06] UB**
Shut up! That's exactly why I don't know
how to face her at times like these!
**[11:12] UB**
You could bring it up casually.
**[11:14] UB**
Just go already.
**[11:15] Gin**
What are you saying? You sound pathetic.
**[11:18] Gin**
Shinpachi, you go.
**[11:19] Shin**
Where did that come from?
**[11:20] Gin**
Shaddup.
**[11:21] Gin**
When you're trying to climb
the stairs to adulthood,
**[11:23] Gin**
adults shouldn't be yelling
at you from the top.
**[11:26] Gin**
This calls for one nowhere near the stairs,
**[11:27] Gin**
a primitive lifeform like you
still groveling on the ground.
**[11:31] Shin**
Who're you calling an amoeba?!
**[11:32] Shin**
Jeez, fine.
**[11:34] Shin**
I'll go ask her, then.
**[11:36] Gin**
Wait, time out!
**[11:38] Shin**
What is it?
**[11:39] Gin**
Never mind. You don't
have to ask her anything.
**[11:41] Shin**
Make up your damn mind!
**[11:42] Kag**
Boy, I'm so hungry.
**[11:44] Kag**
Is dinner ready?
**[11:46] Kag**
Wow, it's red rice!
**[11:48] Kag**
What's up? Did something good happen?
**[11:51] UB**
Huh? Uh, what's up, you ask?
**[11:54] ---**
Er...
**[11:55] UB**
What was up, Gintoki-kun?
**[11:57] Gin**
Huh? U-Uh, y'know, bo...
**[12:00] Gin**
Boy...
**[12:02] Gin**
Boy, oh, boy! Curry came out
of your father's crotch!
**[12:05] Kag**
What's so good about that?
**[12:07] UB**
W-Well, I've been constipated lately,
**[12:09] UB**
so, like, we're celebrating
the tunnel opening?
**[12:12] Gin**
Maybe we should've gone with curry
instead of red rice, huh, Father?
**[12:16] UB**
But it came out with such force
that there was blood mixed in, too.
**[12:19] UB**
It's okay this way, I say.
**[12:20] Kag**
There goes my appetite.
**[12:21] Gin**
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
**[12:23] Gin**
We're sorry!
**[12:24] Gin**
This isn't something we should
talk about over dinner, huh?
**[12:26] UB**
Hurry up and take a seat.
**[12:27] UB**
Shinpachi-kun went to
great pains to make this.
**[12:29] All**
Let's eat!
**[12:38] Gin**
Hey, ask her already, you stupid cue ball!
**[12:40] UB**
Who do you think you're calling a cue ball?
**[12:42] UB**
You're sorely mistaken if you
think light hair doesn't fall off.
**[12:44] UB**
Don't you know how it went with Uncle Jam?
**[12:46] Gin**
You're the one with the Uncle Jam head!
**[12:48] UB**
You're wasting the chance we made
this celebratory red rice to create.
**[12:52] Gin**
You don't intend to celebrate
a hair on her head.
**[12:54] Gin**
Your roots have all died out,
so what are you talking about?
**[12:57] UB**
They haven't! They're just taking
a break because it's half-time.
**[13:00] Gin**
Are you that scared to find out the truth?
**[13:02] Gin**
Are you that scared of
your daughter growing up?
**[13:04] UB**
I'm not the least bit scared.
**[13:06] UB**
I just wanna say that when she leaves Earth,
**[13:08] UB**
it'll be a long-distance relationship,
and it'll be hard to keep up.
**[13:11] UB**
You're the one feeling lonely because you
feel like she's grown distant from you.
**[13:15] Gin**
As if! In fact, that's exactly what I want.
**[13:17] Gin**
I'm just worried she'll neglect her
work because she's distracted by love.
**[13:21] Gin**
I'm totally ready to celebrate this.
**[13:23] Gin**
I'm totally gonna get another
helping of red rice.
**[13:25] UB**
Screw you!
**[13:26] UB**
I'm eating more helpings!
**[13:28] Gin**
Shut up!
**[13:28] Gin**
I'll eat enough red beans to match my age!
**[13:31] UB**
I'm older than you, so I can eat more!
**[13:34] Gin**
Then I'll eat enough to match
the number of hair roots I have!
**[13:37] UB**
Then I'll eat enough to match
the number of dead roots I have!
**[13:40] Gin**
So you admit they've all died out?!
**[13:41] Kag**
What are those two morons doing?
**[13:45] Shin**
S-Say, Kagura-chan...
**[13:47] Shin**
You mentioned this earlier,
**[13:48] Shin**
but is it true you got a boyfriend?
**[13:52] Kag**
I don't really get it.
**[13:54] Kag**
I got a love letter, but honestly,
it hasn't sunk in yet.
**[13:58] Kag**
I don't really understand
all that love stuff, anyway.
**[14:01] Kag**
But I could feel how much heart
he put into what he wrote,
**[14:05] Kag**
so I figured I could at least go on a date—
**[14:08] Bo**
That won't do, Kagura-chan!
**[14:10] Gin**
Dating someone out of sympathy or pity
is the most insulting thing to them!
**[14:13] Gin**
It'll end up hurting them the most!
**[14:16] UB**
You should break up with him.
**[14:17] UB**
Right, Gintoki-kun?
**[14:19] Gin**
That's right.
**[14:19] Gin**
You shouldn't sell yourself short.
Don't you agree, Father?
**[14:23] Kag**
But you could fall for someone once
you start dating them, couldn't you?
**[14:26] Kag**
That's what Daddy said
about his shotgun marriage.
**[14:29] UB**
Some romances start in bed, too.
**[14:32] Gin**
You're the root cause? What the
hell were you telling a child?!
**[14:37] UB**
You've got the wrong idea!
That's not what I meant there...
**[14:39] Kag**
Anyway, I have a date tomorrow,
so I'm going to bed now.
**[14:43] UB**
Wait, Kagura-chan.
**[14:45] Gin**
Feel free to go on a date or whatever.
**[14:47] UB**
But before that...
**[14:49] Bo**
Could you introduce your boyfriend to us?
**[14:54] ---**
How many have we been to now?
**[15:01] UB**
Pops...
**[15:02] Gin**
One more.
**[15:04] Shin**
You're drinking too much, you two!
**[15:06] Shin**
You're meeting Kagura-chan's
boyfriend tomorrow, remember?
**[15:09] UB**
Shut up! Boyfriend, my ass!
**[15:12] UB**
I don't care who he is or where he's
from. I haven't accepted him yet.
**[15:17] Gin**
Yeah, dumbass.
**[15:19] Gin**
It's way too early for a runt like her to
be getting into an illicit relationship.
**[15:24] Gin**
Who gave her permission to ride
the escalator to adulthood?
**[15:28] Gin**
Who does she think raised
her until now? Damn it all.
**[15:33] UB**
Uh, that's my line.
**[15:36] UB**
When exactly did you raise her?
**[15:40] Gin**
You neglected caring for your
daughter and your hair, cue ball.
**[15:43] Gin**
It's too late for you to
start acting like a dad!
**[15:45] UB**
I didn't neglect anything!
**[15:47] UB**
I simply respected the independence
of my daughter and my hair!
**[15:49] UB**
They've both just gone
to study abroad, is all!
**[15:51] Gin**
But they've totally run into trouble there!
**[15:54] Gin**
They're never coming back now!
**[15:56] UB**
They will! They'll come home all blonde!
**[15:59] Shin**
Oh, jeez. Stop it, you two.
**[16:02] Shin**
I understand why you're so worried,
**[16:05] Shin**
but everyone with a daughter has
to face this day eventually.
**[16:09] Shin**
He must be a nice boy, considering
Kagura-chan accepted him.
**[16:14] Shin**
But if we, the hosts, act like this,
we'll end up embarrassing her.
**[16:21] Shin**
While it might get a bit lonely,
**[16:23] Shin**
we must grow up, too.
**[16:26] Shin**
Well, I'll be leaving now.
**[16:28] Shin**
You two make sure to act
like grown-ups tomorrow.
**[16:38] UB**
Grown-up, huh?
**[16:40] UB**
Yeah, it's really childish to get
this worked up over a boyfriend.
**[16:46] UB**
I get it. I really do.
**[16:49] UB**
When she was a baby, I used to be so
happy to see her grow up by the day.
**[16:53] UB**
Be it her first steps, or when
she first learned to speak,
**[16:57] UB**
everything was a life-changing experience.
**[17:00] UB**
When was it that I stopped
finding joy in her growing up?
**[17:06] UB**
When did I start feeling
more lonely than happy?
**[17:11] Gin**
I used to think a grown-up's job was to
run in front while the kids follow behind.
**[17:18] Gin**
But when they eventually overtake us,
**[17:21] Gin**
it's also our job to send
them off with a smile, huh?
**[17:26] Gin**
Man, I can still keep running, though.
**[17:32] UB**
That's exactly it.
**[17:34] UB**
You and I are both still snot-faced brats.
**[17:38] Gin**
Shall we take them, too...
**[17:41] Gin**
The stairs to adulthood?
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[17:56] Shin**
I wonder if those two will be all right.
**[17:58] Shin**
They were acting like children last night,
**[18:00] Shin**
but they did promise to
behave like adults today.
**[18:03] Shin**
I guess it should be okay.
**[18:06] Bo**
Welcome!
**[18:08] Bo**
Welcome to the Sakata household!
**[18:12] Gin**
Oh, it's just you, Shinpachi-kun.
**[18:15] Shin**
What are you doing? That'd scare
the living daylights out of anyone!
**[18:18] UB**
Sorry, sorry.
**[18:19] UB**
We've been waiting in standby since
last night for the boyfriend to arrive,
**[18:23] UB**
so we got a little too excited.
**[18:24] Shin**
Since last night?!
**[18:25] Gin**
And when we practiced our smiles so we
could welcome the boyfriend with a smile,
**[18:28] Gin**
we fell into a "how do you smile,"
**[18:30] Gin**
"what even is a smile,"
**[18:32] Gin**
and "how is 'smile' spelled" loop.
**[18:35] UB**
Are we smiling? Have we managed to smile?
**[18:38] Shin**
Yeah, but there's nothing happy about it!
**[18:40] UB**
We'll be grown-ups today.
**[18:42] UB**
We won't embarrass Kagura.
**[18:45] UB**
You don't need to worry.
**[18:46] Shin**
Uh, where will you find
grown-ups who smile like that?
**[18:48] Shin**
It's nice that you tried to better
yourselves, but you took it too far!
**[18:50] Shin**
You need to be more natural!
**[18:52] UB**
We know, Shinpachi-kun.
**[18:55] UB**
Acting too high-and-mighty would only
put unnecessary pressure on the boy.
**[19:01] UB**
Relax.
**[19:02] UB**
We're grown-ups today.
**[19:04] Gin**
But as grown-ups, we can't
really dress casually here...
**[19:09] Bo**
...so we decided to get
some formals at least.
**[19:10] Shin**
You took growing up too literally!
**[19:13] Shin**
What the hell are you two doing?
**[19:14] Shin**
Is this what you meant by being grown up?
**[19:16] UB**
Huh?
**[19:16] Gin**
What do you mean?
**[19:17] Shin**
Don't give me that!
**[19:18] Shin**
You're intimidating as hell!
**[19:19] Shin**
You can feel the pressure in the air!
**[19:21] Gin**
You must be imagining things.
**[19:22] Gin**
Upper bodies in this anime
have always been like this.
**[19:26] Shin**
When did we become Captain Tsubasa?!
**[19:28] Gin**
Calm down, Shinpachi.
**[19:30] Gin**
You're the one acting unnatural.
**[19:32] Gin**
We're the hosts. We just need to be
ready to welcome with open arms.
**[19:36] Shin**
No, you're the unnatural one!
And your open arms are way too big!
***SIGN*** Great Nature Deism Daily
**[19:40] Gin**
Huh? Isn't this yesterday's
Great Nature paper?
**[19:43] Gin**
Jeez, throw it away.
**[19:44] Shin**
What the hell kind of
newspaper are you reading?
**[19:46] Shin**
Stop it! It'll make the family situation
look complicated and troublesome!
**[19:51] UB**
Oh, Mother.
**[19:52] UB**
Oh, Gaia.
**[19:53] UB**
Kagura-chan is bringing her boyfriend over.
**[19:56] UB**
We'll gain another follower.
**[19:58] Shin**
Hey! Who said you could build
a creepy altar in our place?!
**[20:01] Shin**
What're you praying to it for?!
**[20:02] Shin**
What kind of secrets does this family have?!
**[20:04] Gin**
This is it, right? We just have
to act naturally like this, right?
**[20:07] Shin**
This is too scary!
**[20:09] Shin**
You got so conscious about the natural part,
**[20:10] Shin**
you've made this household
nothing but unnatural!
**[20:12] Shin**
Forget her boyfriend, Kagura-chan
will lose all her friends like this!
**[20:16] Kag**
Hey.
**[20:17] Kag**
I brought my boyfriend.
**[20:21] Shin**
I gotta clean all of this up!
**[20:23] Shin**
Listen up. You two just try
not to do anything stupid.
**[20:26] Shin**
Just smile and sit there. Got that?
**[20:31] Gin**
Hey, you remember the agreement, right?
**[20:34] UB**
Yeah.
**[20:34] Gin**
If one of us goes out of control, the
other will stop him, no matter what.
**[20:38] Gin**
As Kagura's guardian and Kagura's father,
**[20:40] Gin**
we must act like grown-ups
and not embarrass ourselves.
**[20:43] UB**
But don't let him walk over you.
**[20:45] UB**
Say what you need to.
**[20:47] UB**
If they're willing to have a clean
relationship befitting their age,
**[20:50] UB**
we won't stand in their way.
We must make that clear.
**[20:53] UB**
It's okay.
**[20:54] UB**
I only saw him from behind,
but he was a normal kid.
**[20:58] UB**
If grown-ups talk to him
seriously, he should understand.
**[21:02] UB**
I mean, look how grown up we are.
**[21:04] UB**
He's probably never seen
anyone this grown up.
**[21:11] Gin**
What's up, Kagura? Where's your boyfriend?
**[21:14] Kag**
He said he can't come inside.
**[21:16] Gin**
Huh? Is he feeling shy?
**[21:18] Gin**
Just tell him to come in.
**[21:20] Kag**
Like I said, he's saying
he can't come inside.
**[21:22] Gin**
Oh, for crying out loud.
Did he get cold feet?
**[21:25] Gin**
Hey, boyfriend! You can come in!
**[21:28] Gin**
There's nothing to be afraid of!
**[21:31] Gin**
He's kinda pathetic.
**[21:34] Gin**
Is this gonna be okay?
**[21:35] UB**
Well, I guess I can understand.
**[21:37] UB**
I mean, there are two grown-ass grown-ups
here. Of course he'd be scared.
**[21:41] UB**
He's only a child. A big baby.
**[22:03] Bo**
He really is a big baby!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:40] Kag**
The guys are whining too much
just because I got a boyfriend.
**[23:43] Kag**
Girls eventually start staying out late and
coming back the next morning on their own.
**[23:48] Kag**
Get ready for it!
***SIGN*** My Bald Dad, My Light-Haired
Dad, and My Dad's Glasses
**[23:49] Kag**
Next time: "My Bald Dad, My Light-Haired
Dad, and My Dad's Glasses."
***SIGN*** Kagura brought home her big boyfriend.
***SIGN*** It shocked even the grown-ass grown-ups.
***SIGN*** What's more, casual introductions won't be enough?
***SIGN*** Their relationship takes a sudden turn?!
# 330 - My Bald Dad, My Light-Haired Dad, and My Dad's Glasses
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] Kag**
Let me introduce you, 'kay?
**[00:06] Kag**
This is my boyfriend,
Dai-chan from Planet Titan.
**[00:10] Shin**
Huh?
**[00:11] Shin**
Wait, what?!
**[00:14] Shin**
Kagura-chan, what do you mean, Titan?!
**[00:17] Gin**
Hey, what's the meaning of
this? This isn't what you said!
**[00:21] UB**
Kagura-chan, who was the boy
that gave you the letter, then?
**[00:24] Kag**
Oh, he was just a friend who handed
over the letter in Dai-chan's place.
**[00:29] Kag**
Dai-chan's too big to write a letter,
**[00:32] Kag**
and it seems he was too shy
to hand it over himself.
**[00:34] Shin**
Uh... Wait, you actually
had such a huge friend?
**[00:38] Kag**
Yep. Soyo-chan introduced us.
**[00:41] Shin**
The princess?
**[00:42] Kag**
Believe it or not, Dai-chan's
the prince of Planet Titan.
**[00:45] Kag**
But being so big, he had no one to play with
and nowhere he could play, so he was bored.
**[00:53] Kag**
So I played with him, 'kay?
**[00:55] Kag**
And then he got attached to me.
**[01:03] G**
Monsters!
**[01:04] Gin**
*I don't know if I'd call this "attached"...*
**[01:07] Bo**
* It looks more like he brought*
* an army to conquer Earth!*
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** My Bald Dad, My Light-Haired
Dad, and My Dad's Glasses
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and
at a safe distance from your TV!
**[02:48] Kag**
Awesome, right? I totally got the
jump on the bingo balls of life.
**[02:51] Gin**
You may have hit bingo with royalty...
**[02:53] Gin**
But his balls are way too big! Riding those
would be harder than riding a Gundam!
**[02:57] Kag**
Anyway, don't be so nervous,
'kay? Take a seat, Dai-chan.
**[03:05] Gin**
*Huh? Wait, what now?*
**[03:08] Gin**
* Is this the boy? Is this*
* really the boyfriend?*
**[03:10] Gin**
* What's a "boyfriend,"*
* again? How is it spelled?*
**[03:13] UB**
*Calm down. He's just a big boyfriend.*
**[03:16] UB**
* A father whose daughter's boyfriend*
* thinks he's a pushover is done for.*
**[03:19] UB**
Oh, I see. So you're Kagura's boyfriend.
**[03:23] UB**
Thanks for being there for her.
**[03:25] UB**
I'm her father.
**[03:26] Gin**
*That's the space-famous Umibozu for you.*
**[03:29] Gin**
* With no fear of the massive boyfriend,*
* he showed off how dignified a father can be.*
**[03:38] Gin**
*F-F...*
**[03:40] Gin**
*Father!*
**[03:42] Shin**
Umibozu-san!
**[03:44] Shin**
He's been turned to mincemeat!
Only one of his b*lls remains!
**[03:47] Gin**
That's not one of his b*lls!
It's just his cue ball!
**[03:49] Dai**
Ah, my bad.
**[03:51] Dai**
Damn, I overdid it.
**[03:53] Dai**
I ain't been on Earth long,
**[03:57] Dai**
so I don't really get how to do
greetings or, like, the bowing thing.
**[04:01] Dai**
And, like, I can't stand that
kinda formal crap, anyway.
**[04:06] Dai**
You can ignore the prince thing, so why
don't we keep things frank and casual, Pops?
**[04:11] Dai**
Since you're Kagura's old man,
I already consider you a bro.
**[04:15] Dai**
Oh, could you tell me your email address?
**[04:17] UB**
I see. Then I'll tell you...
**[04:20] UB**
the email address to Hell!
**[04:26] Gin**
Why me?!
**[04:27] UB**
C-Calm down! Grow up!
**[04:30] UB**
You promised to be a grown-up today!
**[04:31] Gin**
*You* calm down!
**[04:33] UB**
He comes across as incredibly audacious,
but I'm imagining things, right?
**[04:36] UB**
It just seems like he's looking down
on us because he's so huge, right?
**[04:38] UB**
Kids these days are all
like that, right? Right?!
**[04:41] Gin**
We'll never get anywhere if you
get pissed by whatever a kid says.
**[04:45] Gin**
Let me handle this.
**[04:47] Gin**
Y-Yeah, Earth's societal norms
are too complicated, huh?
**[04:51] Gin**
We just wanted to meet
Kagura's friend, is all.
**[04:55] Gin**
Anyway, make yourself at home. Want some tea?
**[04:57] Dai**
Nah, I'm good. I'm chewing gum.
**[04:59] Gin**
Really? We have snacks, too.
**[05:02] Dai**
Seriously, I'm good. Earth
food doesn't suit my taste.
**[05:05] Gin**
Oh, really?
**[05:06] Gin**
* Could he be any more blunt?*
* Is he messing with me?*
**[05:10] Gin**
What do you usually eat?
**[05:11] Gin**
Your size must complicate things.
**[05:15] Dai**
Hip hop.
**[05:16] Gin**
*What do you mean, you eat hip hop?*
**[05:19] Dai**
The only things on Earth that suit
my tastes are hip hop and reggae.
**[05:24] Dai**
They're music of the soul, check it out.
**[05:28] Kag**
Apparently, everyone on
his planet is a b-boy.
**[05:31] Gin**
*Uh, you guys are just big boys!*
**[05:33] Dai**
Everything else is old-fashioned and lame.
**[05:36] Gin**
* Look who's talking! You're*
* all dressed like cavemen!*
**[05:40] Dai**
Honestly, I was shocked I had to
come meet my girlfriend's folks.
**[05:43] Gin**
Huh? Why?
**[05:44] Dai**
What matters is how the couple
feels in their hearts.
**[05:48] Dai**
Parents sticking their nose
into it is totally lame, I say.
**[05:52] Dai**
Earth is pretty behind the times, huh?
**[05:54] Gin**
Really? I can't tell. Are we?
**[05:58] Gin**
Anyway, isn't it normal to be worried about
the kind of friends your daughter has?
**[06:03] Gin**
Right, Kagura?
**[06:04] Dai**
Y'know, I've been meaning to point this out.
**[06:06] Dai**
I'm not her friend.
**[06:08] Dai**
I'm her boyfriend.
**[06:10] Gin**
Oh, sorry. Boyfriend, huh?
**[06:12] Gin**
I hate to say it, but that
word doesn't exist on Earth.
**[06:15] Gin**
Right, Kagura?
**[06:16] Dai**
Hey, can I be straight with you?
Who are you to Kagura?
**[06:20] Dai**
I don't want some rando calling
her "Kagura" like they're close.
**[06:23] Dai**
She's my gal.
**[06:26] Kag**
Dai-chan, I mentioned this before.
**[06:28] Kag**
Gin-chan's my Earth dad.
**[06:32] Kag**
Wait, brother?
**[06:36] Kag**
Oh, I know. He's like crab lice, 'kay?
**[06:37] Gin**
*Why did I regress to being crab lice?!*
**[06:40] Dai**
Y'know, you're going out with me.
Why are you still living with your ex?
**[06:44] Dai**
I won't stand for half-assing
things like that.
**[06:47] Dai**
Keep messing with my gal,
and I'll make a mess of Earth.
**[06:51] Dai**
FYI, we could wipe out your
Earth if we wanted to.
**[06:55] Dai**
If I say the word, my bros all
over the galaxy will gather here.
**[06:58] Gin**
Bring it!
**[06:59] Gin**
Attack on anytime you want, titans!
**[07:02] Gin**
I'll force a retreat back into space!
**[07:05] Gin**
For your hairline, that is!
**[07:10] UB**
Why my hairline?!
**[07:12] Gin**
Calm down! You're a grown-up!
**[07:14] Gin**
Now we're even!
**[07:15] UB**
Grown-ups don't obsess over getting even!
**[07:17] Gin**
I'm imagining things, right?
**[07:18] Gin**
Some brain-dead boy is saying
he'll wipe out Earth,
**[07:21] Gin**
but only your hair roots
will be wiped out, right?
**[07:23] Gin**
Right? Right?!
**[07:24] UB**
Just calm down, you two.
**[07:27] UB**
Dai-kun, it's not what you think.
These two aren't like that.
**[07:30] UB**
Kagura's only working a live-in job here.
**[07:33] UB**
Honestly, I'm against it too,
but she doesn't listen to me.
**[07:36] Dai**
For real? Who would want to work here?
**[07:39] Shin**
Calm down!
**[07:40] Dai**
But you can rest assured, Pops.
**[07:43] Dai**
I'm gonna finish my work
here and go back home soon.
**[07:46] Dai**
I plan on taking Kagura with me.
**[07:49] Kag**
Hey, what are you talking about?
**[07:52] Dai**
Oh, keep your mouth shut.
**[07:54] Dai**
I don't intend to half-ass
things with Kagura.
**[07:59] Dai**
I'm gonna marry her.
**[08:04] Shin**
Hey! What are you two doing?!
**[08:07] UB**
I'm imagining things, right?
**[08:08] UB**
I think I heard the word "marry" just now,
but I'm just imagining things, right?
**[08:11] Gin**
Yeah, that's right. It's
totally just your imagination.
**[08:14] Kag**
Who said you could talk like that?
**[08:16] Kag**
Marry me? That's news to me.
**[08:18] Dai**
Oh, keep your mouth shut!
**[08:20] Dai**
We're discussing something important here.
**[08:22] Gin**
Uh, I'm not sure I follow. Aren't
you skipping a few too many steps?
**[08:26] Gin**
That stuff comes after
dating and things going well.
**[08:28] Gin**
And you haven't even started dating yet.
**[08:30] Dai**
We don't need to do all that crap.
**[08:33] Dai**
We're soulmates. Our hearts
are totally resonating.
**[08:38] Gin**
Oh, really?
**[08:40] UB**
Now, now. Puppy love makes your
mind go blank and blinds you.
**[08:46] UB**
Most people start finding tons of faults
**[08:48] UB**
and come to hate each other eventually.
**[08:50] Dai**
Nah, that ain't happening with us.
**[08:52] Dai**
I ain't got any faults.
**[08:54] Dai**
And even if Kagura does, I've got
the heart to accept them all.
**[08:58] UB**
Oh, really?
**[09:00] Gin**
Nah, you won't be saying that for long.
**[09:04] Gin**
You'll learn how big a glutton
she is once you live with her.
**[09:07] Gin**
She'll destroy your food budget.
**[09:08] Gin**
Plus she's crude and can't
cook anything but egg-on-rice.
**[09:11] Gin**
She's sure to be a useless housewife
who doesn't do any housework.
**[09:15] UB**
Yeah, yeah.
**[09:16] UB**
Plus she's a 'kay addict
who needs a trip to 'Kay A.
**[09:19] UB**
And your kids will 100%
inherit the bald gene.
**[09:21] UB**
What do you even see in her?
**[09:22] UB**
If I were you, I'd never pick her up
if she was lying on the street.
**[09:25] UB**
I'd take her to the lost and found!
**[09:27] Kag**
Oh, really?!
**[09:31] Kag**
This is perfect, then.
**[09:33] Kag**
You can marry me off and get rid of me.
**[09:36] Kag**
Fine by me, 'kay? I don't like
half-assing things, either.
**[09:39] Kag**
Guess we can date with
an eye toward marriage.
**[09:42] UB**
Wait!
**[09:43] Gin**
That's not it!
**[09:45] Dai**
Well, there you have it. You'll
give us your blessings, right?
**[09:49] Shin**
Now, now.
**[09:50] Shin**
Calm down, all of you.
**[09:52] Shin**
Putting aside the taking Kagura-chan
along thing for now...
**[09:55] Shin**
We'll just take it as a sign that you're
serious about this relationship.
**[10:00] Shin**
That's okay, right?
**[10:01] Bo**
Hell no!
**[10:04] UB**
You're just a rotten virgin with
zero experience! Stay out of this!
**[10:07] UB**
They're not getting engaged
at such a young age!
**[10:10] Gin**
Quit mouthing off about your naïve ideals!
**[10:12] Gin**
Love is just a illusion!
**[10:14] Gin**
True love only begins once that
illusion wears off, you stupid brats!
**[10:16] Shin**
Tell them, not me!
**[10:19] Bo**
We're being grown-ups here
because you told us to grow up!
**[10:22] Shin**
Then say what you're
supposed to as grown-ups!
**[10:25] Gin**
What the hell, man?
What's a grown-up, anyway?
**[10:27] Gin**
I don't know anymore!
**[10:28] Shin**
Meanwhile, those two went off on their date!
**[10:34] Bo**
Ack!
**[10:39] Kag**
Man, dating is a pain.
**[10:43] Kag**
Can't we just stay friends?
**[10:46] Kag**
We're only gonna be sparring
like usual anyway, right?
**[10:49] Dai**
Nah, it was only during the day so far,
**[10:51] Dai**
but now we'll be able to spar at night, too.
**[10:55] Dai**
More than anything, I don't
wanna let anyone else have you.
**[10:57] Kag**
I don't see why I have to be monopolized
by either you or those morons.
**[11:01] Dai**
Are you stupid? You know that ain't it.
**[11:04] Dai**
If you love someone, you
wanna make them yours alone.
**[11:07] Dai**
Ain't it only natural to feel that way?
**[11:10] Kag**
Well, I wouldn't really care
if someone else took you.
**[11:14] Dai**
Y-You just haven't realized that you're
in love yet because you're such a child!
**[11:18] Kag**
Then what? Those morons are saying
they don't wanna give me away.
**[11:21] Kag**
Are they in love with me, too?
**[11:22] Dai**
That's a different kinda love. Like, familial.
**[11:25] Dai**
But we gotta distance ourselves from
that and find our own love someday.
**[11:30] Kag**
I see. But in a way, they love me too, huh?
**[11:37] Dai**
Hey, what are you smirking for?
**[11:40] Kag**
No reason.
**[11:43] Kag**
It's been a long day. I'm exhausted.
**[11:46] Kag**
Let's save the date for another day, 'kay?
**[11:48] Dai**
What? Why?!
**[11:50] Dai**
I said I'm going back home soon, didn't I?
**[11:53] Kag**
We can just have a
long-distance relationship.
**[11:55] Dai**
Hey, wait up!
**[11:57] Dai**
Are you okay with being separated from me?
**[12:00] Dai**
I could cheat on you back
home! You okay with that?!
**[12:03] Kag**
That's pretty much it, Dai-chan.
**[12:05] Kag**
You can find love scattered anywhere.
**[12:08] Kag**
But those scatterbrains...
**[12:11] Kag**
...I can only find here.
**[12:15] Kag**
See you.
**[12:16] Kag**
Write to me, 'kay?
**[12:21] Dai**
I ain't letting you go, Kagura.
**[12:24] Dai**
I ain't gonna accept a
long-distance relationship.
**[12:31] Dai**
I finally found robust genes that are
worthy of being inherited by titans.
**[12:39] Dai**
I can't let the people on this planet
keep them all to themselves.
**[12:45] Soyo**
What?!
**[12:46] Soyo**
Kagura-chan and Prince Dai?!
**[12:49] Soyo**
I didn't know those two had
that kind of relationship.
**[12:53] Soyo**
He took Kagura-chan from me.
I feel a little burned.
**[12:58] Bo**
Things really will burn.
**[13:00] UB**
If you don't tell us where
they hang out right now...
**[13:05] Gin**
...we'll burn down your castle.
**[13:07] Shin**
Hey! The princess has
nothing to do with this!
**[13:10] Shin**
She didn't do anything wrong!
**[13:12] Gin**
But you're the one who introduced
him to Kagura, right?
**[13:15] Gin**
Where did you guys hang out?
**[13:17] Gin**
Which love hotel district?
Which storeroom behind a gym?
**[13:20] Gin**
Which orgy venue?
**[13:21] Soyo**
We'd never hang out at such places!
**[13:24] Soyo**
I-It was usually the
river bank or the park...
**[13:28] Soyo**
Hey!
**[13:29] Soyo**
They might be gone already!
**[13:33] Shin**
There they go.
**[13:35] Shin**
What do you mean, they might be gone?
**[13:39] Soyo**
Despite what the titans look like,
**[13:43] Soyo**
they're a peaceful and quiet race as
long as they can listen to hip hop.
**[13:48] Soyo**
There's just one thing.
**[13:50] Soyo**
Titan royalty have looked for their
brides on other planets for generations.
**[13:56] Soyo**
But what they do after
they find her is crazy.
**[14:00] Soyo**
They look to monopolize her genes.
**[14:03] Soyo**
To prevent the spread of their perfect
spouse's genes outside their own race,
**[14:08] Soyo**
they eradicate all life on
the bride's home planet,
**[14:12] Soyo**
leaving no traces,
not even a strand of DNA.
***SIGN*** Massive UFO in Edo Skies
**[14:20] Hana**
Are you all seeing this?
**[14:22] Hana**
Titans suddenly appeared in Edo,
**[14:25] Hana**
with a huge ship that nearly covers
the entire sky above the city.
**[14:29] Hana**
Just who are they?
**[14:32] Shin**
Dai-kun will destroy Earth?
**[14:35] Shin**
No way! Did we treat him badly?
**[14:37] Shin**
Did we act too much like
an annoying mother-in-law?!
**[14:40] Soyo**
That's not really the issue.
**[14:43] Shin**
Forget coming to take our girl,
**[14:46] Shin**
he came to take our Earth?!
**[14:48] Shin**
Forget the bingo balls of life,
**[14:49] Shin**
he came to crush the
ball that gives us life?!
**[14:53] Soyo**
We must stop the titans at once.
**[14:55] Soyo**
I'll let Brother know and have the
Bakufu Army move out right away.
**[14:59] Shin**
You've got it wrong.
**[15:01] Shin**
They aren't the ones we need to stop.
**[15:06] Shin**
The titans aren't the ones we
need to be truly afraid of.
**[15:11] Hana**
Oh, look at that!
**[15:13] Hana**
An army of titans dressed in
formal attire is descending on us!
**[15:22] Dai**
Earthlings.
**[15:24] Dai**
As Planet Titan's representative,
allow me to express our gratitude.
**[15:30] Dai**
You have our heartfelt gratitude
for giving us the perfect bride.
**[15:38] Dai**
Rejoice.
**[15:40] Dai**
With this ceremony,
**[15:41] Dai**
Earthling DNA will gain eternal
prosperity along with us titans.
**[15:51] Dai**
Please give your blessings
to our marriage ceremony.
**[15:57] Hana**
I-Is this a wedding?
**[16:00] Hana**
The titans have destroyed the city
and built a big marriage venue!
**[16:05] Hana**
Wait, is that...
**[16:06] Hana**
An Earthling girl?!
**[16:08] Hana**
The titans have taken a lone girl captive!
**[16:12] P**
Do you promise to be true to
her in good times and bad,
**[16:16] P**
in sickness and in health, and to love
and honor her all the days of your life?
**[16:22] Dai**
I do.
**[16:24] Hana**
Is this a ceremony to take
that girl as his wife?
**[16:29] P**
Bride. Do you promise to be true
to him in good times and bad,
**[16:33] P**
in sickness and in health, and to love
and honor him all the days of your life?
**[16:37] Dai**
She said she does.
**[16:39] P**
You may now seal your vows with a kiss.
**[16:46] Hana**
That innocent girl's purity is about
to be taken by those massive lips!
**[16:52] Dai**
*Kagura...*
**[16:53] Dai**
*Now your strong genes belong to me!*
**[16:57] Dai**
*You should just look at me, and me alone.*
**[17:02] Shin**
Hold it right there!
**[17:08] Dai**
Wait, father!
**[17:09] Dai**
We can't! I don't swing that way!
**[17:12] Dai**
Father? Father!
**[17:16] Shin**
Dai-kun.
**[17:17] Shin**
I'm sorry, but I can't
let you have Kagura-chan.
**[17:21] Shin**
You don't have the right
**[17:25] Shin**
to call yourself her boyfriend.
**[17:27] Dai**
Damn you...
**[17:28] Dai**
How dare you ruin this sacred
ceremony and my first kiss?!
**[17:35] Shin**
It's too bad.
**[17:36] Shin**
In your obsession with keeping
Kagura-chan to yourself,
**[17:39] Shin**
you trampled on her feelings and tried
to take away something precious to her.
**[17:43] Dai**
This has nothing to do with you! Piss off!
**[17:46] Shin**
Do you understand?!
**[17:48] Shin**
The dear daughter he raised was
taken from him by some random guy,
**[17:53] Shin**
and yet, for her sake, he tried
to welcome him with a smile.
**[17:56] Shin**
Do you understand that
bald father's feelings?
**[17:59] Shin**
Do you understand?
**[18:00] Shin**
He let go of the person he'd
protected with care for so long,
**[18:03] Shin**
believed in the man she chose, and even
tried to entrust his sword to him.
**[18:08] Shin**
Do you understand that
light-haired father's feelings?
**[18:11] Shin**
Do you understand?
**[18:12] Shin**
He actually felt really sad,
**[18:14] Shin**
but held back his tears and played
the straight man for Kagura's sake.
**[18:18] Shin**
Do you understand how those
father's glasses felt?!
**[18:20] Dai**
Will you guys shut up about fathers already?
**[18:23] Dai**
Quit poking your nose in
a couple's relationship!
**[18:25] Dai**
It's gross as hell!
**[18:27] Dai**
If you can't let your child go,
I'll lop off your arm for you!
**[18:32] Dai**
Before the ceremony, cause a bloodbath
with the annoying apes of Earth!
**[18:37] Dai**
Offer them up as sacrifices for our wedding!
**[18:40] Dai**
Attack on, titans!
**[18:42] Hana**
Oh, no! Titans are pouring
out of their mother ship!
**[18:45] Hana**
Are we witnessing the apocalypse?!
**[18:48] Dai**
Adios, fathers.
**[18:50] Dai**
Your dear daughter belongs
to me, the great Dai!
**[18:54] Dai**
Huh? I don't think we arranged
for a rice shower...
**[18:59] Hana**
A rain of blood?
**[19:01] Hana**
Can you believe it? Instead of a rice shower,
a red shower of blood is raining down!
**[19:06] Hana**
It's the blood of titans!
**[19:08] Hana**
This isn't titans attacking on!
It's an attack on titans!
**[19:11] Dai**
N-No way.
**[19:14] Shin**
Gross?
**[19:17] Shin**
Fine by us.
**[19:18] Shin**
Be it a boyfriend's possessiveness toward
his girl, or a race's possessiveness,
**[19:23] Shin**
all men are gross in one way
or another, including you.
**[19:25] Shin**
But that's nothing.
**[19:27] Shin**
You're up against a father's gross
possessiveness toward his daughter.
**[19:31] Shin**
Don't think you can beat that!
**[19:35] Gin**
Hey, boyfriend. I'm impressed.
**[19:38] Gin**
I never expected you to be prepared
to destroy Earth to make Kagura yours.
**[19:44] Gin**
When you're asking someone for their
daughter they raised with love,
**[19:48] Gin**
you do need the balls to
take an entire planet.
**[19:51] Gin**
Yeah, it takes balls from
both the taker and the giver.
**[19:55] Dai**
You guys want to start a planetary
war over a single girl?!
**[20:00] UB**
As if grown-ass grown-ups would ever
do that for a filthy brat like her.
**[20:06] Gin**
You can take her with you, but...
**[20:09] Bo**
Only once you grow up and learn how to bow!
**[20:19] Gin**
We finally said something grown up.
**[20:22] UB**
Yeah.
**[20:23] UB**
Now we're full-fledged adults, too.
**[20:26] Bo**
Oh...
**[20:27] Bo**
We forgot about Kagura.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[20:41] Shin**
Whoa, hold it.
**[20:42] Shin**
What's with that huge letter?
**[20:44] Kag**
It's a letter from Dai-chan from back home.
**[20:48] Kag**
You guys should read it, too.
**[20:49] Shin**
What? From that prince?
**[20:52] Shin**
Are we gonna be okay? He's not
declaring war or anything, right?
**[20:55] Shin**
If he comes back to take Kagura-chan,
what do we do, Gin-san?
**[20:59] Gin**
Shinpachi, send a reply at once.
**[21:01] UB**
"She's a good-for-nothing
daughter, but please take—"
**[21:07] Shin**
Uh...
**[21:08] Shin**
"Thanks for taking care of
me during my stay on Earth.
**[21:12] Shin**
Interacting with a different culture,
I've realized the importance of family.
**[21:15] Shin**
In particular, I had the opportunity to
learn all too well how great fathers are.
**[21:18] Shin**
It was a great learning experience."
**[21:20] Shin**
Huh? He's turned over a new leaf
and become a different person!
**[21:24] UB**
Well, his letters are always polite.
**[21:27] Dai**
*The next time I get a girlfriend,*
**[21:29] Dai**
* I want to forget about our dated and evil*
* customs and treat her family well, too.*
**[21:33] Dai**
*In particular, I'll treat the father well.*
**[21:35] Dai**
* I'll try not to defy the*
* father, no matter what.*
**[21:38] Shin**
Uh, fathers have totally
become a trauma to him now.
**[21:41] UB**
Well, a lot happened, but
all's well that ends well.
**[21:45] UB**
He took a step forward as a person.
**[21:47] UB**
With this, the home planet of those
lugs should improve a little bit.
**[21:50] Gin**
Apparently not.
**[21:53] Dai**
* P.S. I recently found some*
* amazing genes that interest me.*
**[21:57] Dai**
*Fathers really are amazing, huh?*
**[22:02] Shin**
Um...
**[22:03] Shin**
I don't know about improving. If this
keeps up, their planet will die out.
**[22:07] Gin**
This is on you.
**[22:08] Gin**
He awakened to the other side because
of what you did to the priest.
**[22:10] Shin**
Don't pin all the blame on me!
You did this by going too far!
**[22:13] Gin**
Tell the old man that. I'm not the father.
**[22:16] UB**
What do you mean? I'm still
young enough to be called "bro"!
**[22:18] Gin**
Yeah, right, "bro." More like
your hair all went "go home."
**[22:21] UB**
They didn't go home! I'm
still attacking on, fightan!
**[22:23] Shin**
What happened to bro?
**[22:25] Kag**
*To Dai-chan.*
**[22:26] Kag**
*I learned a lot thanks to you, too.*
**[22:30] Kag**
* I don't really get the difference*
* between romantic and familial love yet,*
**[22:34] Kag**
*but for now,*
**[22:37] Kag**
* I'm fine with having just*
* these guys as boyfriends.*
***SIGN*** A Bowl of Ramen
**[23:49] Gin**
Next time: "A Bowl of Ramen."
***SIGN*** Next time, the widow running a ramen place,
***SIGN*** Ikumatsu, makes an appearance after ten long years.
***SIGN*** We have the always familiar, the nostalgic,
***SIGN*** and the somewhat different people all in one big gathering.
# 331 - A Bowl of Ramen
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] (Flashback) H**
Here's your ramen!
**[00:07] I**
Late on New Year's Eve,
**[00:09] I**
that scruffy-looking man ordered not
New Year's soba, but a bowl of ramen.
**[00:16] I**
"I can't eat this much."
**[00:19] I**
Saying that, the man took two extra cups,
divided his ramen into three portions,
**[00:23] I**
and shared them with my husband and me.
**[00:26] I**
And after devouring his
portion in an instant,
**[00:30] I**
he left, walking down the wintry
streets with his stomach rumbling.
**[00:38] I**
The next year, and the year after that...
***SIGN*** Hokuto Shinken
**[00:41] I**
Every New Year's Eve, that man would visit.
**[00:44] I**
He would always use
what little money he had
**[00:48] I**
to order a bowl of ramen
and share it with us.
**[00:53] I**
Each time, my husband would
divide it into three portions,
**[00:56] I**
load one of them up with pork topping,
and serve it to the man.
**[01:01] I**
Meanwhile, he would slurp on
ramen that was nothing but soup.
**[01:05] (Flashback) H**
Ikumatsu.
**[01:07] (Flashback) H**
This is our restaurant's
year-end tradition now.
**[01:12] (Flashback) H**
Should anything happen to me,
make sure you keep it going.
**[01:17] I**
That would turn out to be the last
bowl of ramen my husband ever made.
**[01:22] I**
It would also mark the end of the little
year-end tradition the three of us shared.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** A Bowl of Ramen
***SIGN*** Hokuto Shinken
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[03:07] I**
He didn't come last New Year's Eve, either.
***SIGN*** Ramen
**[03:11] I**
Ever since my husband passed away,
he hasn't shown up at all.
**[03:15] I**
He was a strange one.
**[03:17] I**
He clearly had no money to spare,
but he'd share his ramen with us
**[03:21] I**
and then leave, still hungry.
**[03:23] I**
He must've been really lonely.
**[03:26] I**
Maybe he was coming here
for company, not ramen.
**[03:31] I**
Who knows where he is
and what he's doing now?
**[03:34] I**
Meanwhile, here I am,
upholding my husband's last wish
**[03:36] I**
and waiting for him with a bowl
loaded up with pork topping.
**[03:40] I**
Here's your ramen—
**[03:42] Shin**
Don't try to hog the pork!
**[03:45] Gin**
Shut it! I'm the one who won big at pachinko!
**[03:47] Gin**
You sit there and sip on the soup!
**[03:49] Kag**
The egg! Let me just have the egg!
**[03:50] I**
Jeez, you three.
**[03:52] I**
Why not drink a soup of the dirt in that
old man's nails while you're at it?
**[03:56] I**
I hope he's doing just as
well as you seem to be.
**[04:00] I**
I can't help but be worried.
**[04:02] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono, I would say
your concern is unnecessary.
**[04:06] Kat**
If that poor, lonely man was coming here
seeking company at the end of the year,
**[04:12] Kat**
it's actually a good thing
that he stopped showing up.
**[04:16] Kat**
He must've settled down in life
**[04:17] Kat**
and found someone he can eat traditional
New Year's food with instead of ramen.
**[04:21] Kat**
Or maybe the ramen here got
worse once you took over—
**[04:25] I**
Here's your soba!
**[04:27] Shin**
Y-You know that's not right, Katsura-san!
**[04:29] Shin**
Ikumatsu-san's ramen is the best in Edo!
No, the best in the universe!
**[04:33] Shin**
There's no doubt that man is just
dying to have it one more time, too!
**[04:36] Shin**
Right, Ikumatsu-san?
**[04:37] Kag**
He's got some nerve to not show any
gratitude after all that pork he ate.
**[04:40] Kag**
If he's got money now, he should come
back and share some ramen with us.
**[04:44] Shin**
What do you have to do with anything?
**[04:46] I**
This is a task my husband left to me
after worrying about it until the end.
**[04:51] I**
Taking over the restaurant was all well
and good, but this lingers with me.
**[04:55] I**
And I haven't returned that scarf, either.
**[04:57] I**
But you're right.
**[04:59] I**
He must be leading such a happy life that
he forgot all about this dingy ramen shop.
**[05:05] I**
I'll just assume that's what happened.
**[05:06] I**
Either way, there's nothing I can do
but stay here and keep making ramen.
**[05:14] Gin**
Hey, Zura.
**[05:16] Gin**
Unlike you, I'm a busy man.
**[05:19] Kat**
I'm not Zura. I'm Katsura.
**[05:20] Gin**
I'm in luck today.
**[05:22] Gin**
The dice and the cards
are all waiting for me.
**[05:25] Kat**
What's that saying? A fool with a big
mouth and his money are soon parted?
**[05:29] Kat**
I said what I did earlier out of
consideration for Ikumatsu-dono.
**[05:32] Kat**
But Gintoki, what do you think
happened to that man, honestly?
**[05:37] Gin**
He had no home or family,
and he was old to boot, right?
**[05:41] Gin**
Probably died on the streets, at best.
**[05:43] Kat**
Probably.
**[05:45] Kat**
But that's only if the
man was truly homeless.
**[05:48] Kat**
This scarf he forgot at the restaurant...
**[05:51] Kat**
It's worn out from use,
but it's a high-quality item.
**[05:55] Kat**
It would also have stuck out like a sore
thumb if a homeless man was wearing it.
**[05:59] Kat**
We might be able to find him.
**[06:01] Kat**
If he's still alive, that is.
**[06:04] Kat**
But if you truly are in luck today,
**[06:07] Kat**
I might be able to clear
my tab at Hokuto Shinken.
**[06:10] Gin**
Not happening. Anyway,
what I want to know is...
**[06:13] Gin**
Zura, did you get all the way
to **** base with Ikumatsu?
**[06:19] Kat**
O-Of all the disgusting
accusations! Have some shame!
**[06:22] Gin**
I mean, you're always on
her side for some reason,
**[06:24] Gin**
and I keep running into you every
time I go there for ramen lately.
**[06:28] Gin**
So you haven't sealed the deal yet, huh?
**[06:29] Gin**
And here I thought you'd already sucked
on something else besides ramen.
**[06:32] Kat**
Don't be stupid!
**[06:34] Kat**
As if Ikumatsu-dono and I would
ever have ***, get **** and *****,
**[06:37] Kat**
or worse, **** like *******!
**[06:40] Gin**
Uh, I never said anything that vulgar.
**[06:43] Gin**
Yeah, you have always been the passive sort.
**[06:47] Gin**
So you wanna pound the pavement here and
then pound Ikumatsu while you're at it, huh?
**[06:52] Gin**
If that's how it was,
you shoulda said so sooner.
**[06:54] Gin**
I can give you a discount
on the cupid service.
**[06:57] Kat**
I didn't ask for that!
**[06:58] Gin**
Don't play dumb! I know
your tastes inside and out!
**[07:01] Gin**
You've always been into married women.
**[07:01] Shin**
That's one weakness I didn't expect.
**[07:03] Gin**
Come to think of it, your first love
as a kid was a neighborhood widow—
**[07:07] Kat**
You dare insult a samurai?! Keep it up
and I won't hesitate to cut even you down!
**[07:11] Kat**
I'm not into married women!
**[07:14] Kat**
I'm into cuckoldry!
**[07:16] Shin**
You just exposed a fetish that's
totally unbefitting a samurai!
**[07:18] Kat**
And it's not Ikumatsu-dono
that I'm in love with!
**[07:21] Kat**
It's the taste of her soba!
**[07:23] Kat**
She inherited that from her husband,
**[07:25] Kat**
and I just want to make that
man eat it one more time.
**[07:28] Kat**
Eat that bowl of ramen she
promised her husband to serve.
**[07:31] Gin**
How admirable.
**[07:33] Gin**
You wanna pound the pavement to help her
fulfill her promise with your love rival?
**[07:38] Kat**
Unfortunately, we're not rivals in love.
**[07:41] Kat**
It's not something I will ever be.
**[07:44] Kat**
Because Ikumatsu-dono only
has eyes for one man.
**[07:51] Bum**
Hey, what's all that about?
**[07:53] Bum**
That's one young newcomer.
**[07:56] Kat**
Pleased to meet you.
**[07:58] Kat**
I grew sick of being a samurai,
quit sticking swords in people,
**[08:02] Kat**
and chose to stick myself in a cardboard box.
**[08:04] Kat**
My name is Katsura Kuzutaro.
**[08:06] Kat**
I hope to get along with all of you.
You may casually call me Kuzura.
**[08:10] Bum**
For someone who grew sick of his life,
you're awfully lively, Kuzura-san.
**[08:14] Kat**
I'm not Kuzura! I'm Katsura!
**[08:16] Kat**
And this here is my partner, Kuzuta—
**[08:20] Gin**
Hey, how did things end up this way?
**[08:22] Bum**
The other guy's got the same
look in his eyes as us.
**[08:25] Bum**
Welcome, Kuzuta-san.
**[08:27] Bum**
Hey, nice to meetcha.
**[08:27] Gin**
As if! Don't lump me in with you lot!
**[08:29] Kat**
The best people to ask about a
homeless man are the homeless.
**[08:33] Kat**
I came up with this cover to
make them less wary of us...
**[08:36] Kat**
But I'm amazed you blended in
instantly. That's my Kuzuta.
**[08:40] Gin**
That doesn't make me happy!
**[08:42] Gin**
I really should've gone looking for the
scarf store with Shinpachi and Kagura.
**[08:46] Kat**
Sorry, but who among you
knows a lot about this stuff?
**[08:49] Kat**
I have a lot of questions
regarding the cardboard life.
**[08:52] Bum**
Oh, then you should go meet the Lawd.
You can introduce yourself, too.
**[08:56] Kat**
The Lord?
**[08:57] Bum**
Yeah. The chief of cardboard boxes
and leader of all the homeless here.
***SIGN*** Lawd
**[09:02] Bum**
We call him Lawd, for
Leader At the Waste Dump.
**[09:04] Bum**
The Lawd knows all, and he can
solve most problems you might face.
**[09:08] Musashi**
What's going on? It's awfully noisy.
**[09:11] Bum**
It's the Lawd! The Lawd has
graced us with his presence!
**[09:19] Gin**
Hey, what are you doing, Hasega—
**[09:23] Mu**
Men, throw these two out of Eden at once.
**[09:27] Gin**
Uh, what are you talking about?
What the hell is "Eden"?
**[09:30] Gin**
Hey, stop talking through an interpreter.
**[09:32] Gin**
You're totally made in Japan.
**[09:35] Mu**
These two bring disaster wherever they go.
**[09:38] Gin**
Uh, I don't wanna hear that
from a walking disaster.
**[09:42] Gin**
I'm willing to ask as many times as it takes.
**[09:43] Gin**
What are you doing? Why are you
here at your age, Hasega—
**[09:47] Mu**
Quit chanting the Hasegawa death spell!
**[09:50] Gin**
It's your damn name! And use
your own mouth to speak!
**[09:52] Gin**
You're pissing me off!
**[09:54] Mu**
The lower realm's mores don't apply here.
**[09:57] Mu**
This is Eden.
**[09:58] Mu**
A different world where those who have
been liberated from everything gather.
**[10:02] Gin**
That so?
**[10:03] Gin**
I don't care if you're Hasegawa-san
or the Lawd anymore.
**[10:05] Gin**
Just trash either way.
**[10:06] Mu**
Who're you calling trash?!
**[10:07] Gin**
Say, did you ever see anyone
wearing this scarf—
**[10:10] Mu**
Can't answer that.
**[10:12] Mu**
Everyone here is truly free.
**[10:15] Mu**
Nobody is allowed to pry into
or bring up their past lives!
**[10:18] Mu**
And we have no information
to share with outsiders.
**[10:22] Mu**
If you wish to become one of us so badly,
**[10:25] Mu**
offer me 30 bags of empty cans and
**[10:28] Mu**
60 discarded convenience
store lunch boxes as tribute.
**[10:31] Mad**
Got that, uh... Kuzuta-san, was it?
**[10:34] Mad**
Only the people who were at rock bottom in
the lower world can make it to the top here.
**[10:40] Gin**
If you're gonna laugh, do it yourself!
**[10:44] Bum**
Lawd!
**[10:48] West**
Pick up empty cans?
**[10:50] West**
Save yer sleeptalkin' for when yer asleep.
**[10:52] West**
I thought we made it clear this was our yard.
**[10:56] West**
All the empty cans and discarded
convenience store lunch boxes are ours!
**[10:59] West**
You louts hurry up and get
outta this park already!
**[11:01] Gin**
Who the heck are those guys?
**[11:02] Bum**
The Westside Gang!
**[11:03] Bum**
The armed cardboard gang who control
the west side of this park!
**[11:07] Gin**
What the hell is an armed cardboard gang?
**[11:09] Bum**
They're upstarts that use violent oppression
to expand their rule on cardboard!
**[11:14] Gin**
Wait, what? Did we enter the Warring
Cardboard Era while I wasn't paying attention?
**[11:20] Mu**
Get outta here!
**[11:22] Mu**
This is a free utopia!
**[11:24] Mu**
We won't hand it over, no
matter how many times you try.
**[11:26] Gin**
You're stepping on the Lawd!
He was trying to say something!
**[11:28] Mu**
We won't give in to violence!
**[11:30] Mu**
We only fall to our knees
in our cardboard boxes!
**[11:33] Gin**
But the Lawd's totally giving
in to violence beneath you!
**[11:35] Gin**
And this interpreter's just
running his mouth now, isn't he?
**[11:38] Bum**
Interpreter? What are you saying, Kuzuta-san?
**[11:41] Bum**
This is the Lawd.
**[11:43] Gin**
What?! *He* was the Lawd all along?!
**[11:46] Gin**
Then what was with the old man next
to him who was dressed all godlike?
**[11:49] Bum**
That's the guy always mumbling
something by the Lawd's side.
**[11:52] Gin**
In the end, you've hit rock
bottom in this world, too!
**[11:56] Bro**
Now there's a face that takes me back.
**[11:58] Bro**
I found an unexpected diamond
buried in the trash.
**[12:03] Bro**
I see.
**[12:04] Bro**
So you came here, too...
**[12:07] Bro**
Katsura!
**[12:08] Kat**
Y-You're...
**[12:14] Gin**
Who are you, again?
**[12:15] Bro**
Don't interpret for the
people watching at home!
**[12:17] Bro**
Don't tell me you forgot...
**[12:20] Bro**
How you got me thrown in jail for that woman
**[12:23] Bro**
and reduced me to being homeless!
**[12:29] Gin**
I see.
**[12:30] Gin**
After crossing swords with
you at the Land of Korin,
**[12:32] Gin**
I never expected you to return as a cyborg.
**[12:35] Bro**
That's Mercenary Tao!
**[12:37] Bro**
Just look at the quality
difference in our comebacks!
**[12:39] Kat**
I remember now! You're Ikumatsu-dono's
brother from back then...
**[12:43] Kat**
Fancy running into you here.
**[12:46] Bro**
I'd rather you didn't sum it up so easily.
**[12:49] Bro**
I mean, ever since then, I've lived my
life thinking of nothing but you guys.
**[12:54] Bro**
You two ruined my life,
**[12:55] Bro**
so I was chomping at the bit for a
chance to get my revenge on you two!
**[13:00] Kat**
Oh? By becoming king of
this cardboard mountain?
**[13:04] Kat**
Talk about a roundabout revenge.
**[13:06] Bro**
Look, I know that you're
here to look for that man.
**[13:12] Kat**
What are you talking about?
**[13:14] Bro**
Don't play dumb.
**[13:16] Bro**
I know all about it.
**[13:18] Bro**
How my brother desperately looked for
him here while he was still alive.
**[13:23] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono's husband did what?!
**[13:25] Bro**
How that man visited that
filthy ramen place every year,
**[13:30] Bro**
and just who he is, too.
**[13:37] W**
Um, if I may ask, where did you get this?
**[13:42] Shin**
Oh, we're looking for its owner, too.
**[13:46] W**
This crest on the lining
certainly is Nishikiya's.
**[13:50] Kag**
Really? Does it ring any bells?
**[13:53] Kag**
Did some filthy old man come here to buy it?
**[13:56] W**
This isn't one of our products.
It belonged to the master of Nishikiya.
**[14:00] Kag**
Master? Like the boss of this place?
**[14:04] W**
Yes. I remember him wearing it
with style whenever he went out.
**[14:10] Shin**
Where is he? Where is he now?
**[14:13] W**
He passed away around 20 years ago.
**[14:18] W**
Why would this thing show
up after all this time?
**[14:20] Shin**
Um, was it given away to
someone after he died?
**[14:24] Shin**
Are there any family members who might know?
**[14:27] W**
Just the young miss.
**[14:29] W**
But she was very young when her father died.
**[14:34] W**
She probably doesn't remember anything.
**[14:36] W**
Nishikiya is a textile store that the
master and mistress built themselves.
**[14:42] W**
Right when they'd overcome hard times
and put up shop, the master passed away.
**[14:47] W**
After that, the mistress made the
store grow this big all by herself.
**[14:51] W**
But she died six years ago, too.
**[14:54] W**
On top of that, the young
miss lost her husband.
**[14:59] W**
So even if she doesn't
remember anything anymore,
**[15:01] W**
I'm sure the young miss will
be delighted if she sees this.
**[15:07] I**
I wonder about that.
**[15:09] I**
After having the scarf
taken without permission
**[15:11] I**
and people sniffing around
without her knowing,
**[15:14] I**
even the gentle young miss might get angry.
**[15:17] I**
Just kidding.
**[15:18] I**
Delivery for you, Osono-san.
**[15:21] Bro**
Katsura, I came here to kill that man.
**[15:27] Bro**
"That man" being Ikumatsu's dad,
who is said to have died 20 years ago.
**[15:43] I**
Oh, you're trying to find that
homeless man using this scarf?
**[15:48] I**
Jeez, you could've just told me.
**[15:51] I**
Sorry you went through all
this trouble for my sake.
**[15:56] I**
Yes.
**[15:57] I**
The scarf belonged to Nishiki Matsugoro,
Nishikiya's founder, who died 20 years ago.
**[16:03] I**
And I'm Matsugoro's daughter,
Nishiki Ikumatsu.
**[16:08] Shin**
Y-You're Nishikiya's heiress?
**[16:13] I**
Sorry I didn't mention it.
It's just not me, you know?
**[16:17] I**
Running a ramen restaurant
suits me much better, right?
**[16:20] I**
Of course it does.
**[16:21] I**
Nishikiya may be one of the
top textile showrooms now,
**[16:25] I**
but until it was started,
we lived in abject poverty.
**[16:29] I**
But while life was hard, we had fun.
**[16:32] I**
Even if we had nothing to eat, the three
of us supported one another as we lived.
**[16:37] I**
But it all came crashing down the moment
we became able to live a decent life.
**[16:42] I**
Ironic, right?
**[16:43] Shin**
If I may ask, how did your father pass away?
**[16:47] I**
I was really young back
then, so I have no idea.
**[16:51] I**
Besides, he was living elsewhere
with his mistress back then.
**[16:57] I**
As soon as our store got on track,
**[17:00] I**
he apparently made a move on
one of the girls working here.
**[17:03] I**
Mom found out and threw him out.
**[17:06] I**
Not long after that, we heard
that he'd died of illness.
**[17:11] I**
People were saying he deserved it for
abandoning his wife and daughter,
**[17:16] I**
but I still remember how
sad my mother looked then.
**[17:22] I**
I don't know how the scarf found
its way to that homeless man,
**[17:26] I**
but I'm guessing it means my dad
was living a similar life to him.
**[17:32] I**
Thinking about it that way, I just
can't think of him as any old man.
**[17:36] I**
Sorry I made you waste your time for me.
**[17:39] I**
Ultimately, maybe people are best off when
they have to fight to live another day.
**[17:46] I**
The moment we have more than we
need, our eyes start to wander.
**[17:51] I**
I feel like we could clearly see what
was important when we were poor.
**[17:57] I**
If it weren't for that, I'm sure his
eyes wouldn't have strayed from us.
**[18:04] I**
And we would've been able
to forgive him, too.
**[18:10] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono's father is alive?!
**[18:13] Bro**
That's right. He was barely
scraping by in this dump.
**[18:18] Kat**
No way. You mean the homeless man who
kept visiting the restaurant was...
**[18:24] Bro**
Wait, you really didn't know?
**[18:27] Bro**
And Ikumatsu didn't realize
that he was her father?
**[18:33] Bro**
That's funny.
**[18:35] Bro**
She forgot what her own dad looked like?
**[18:40] Bro**
Of course you'd forget about a scumbag
who left his family for another woman.
**[18:46] Bro**
Isn't that right?
**[18:47] Bro**
How long are you gonna stay
silent? I know you're here.
**[18:52] Bro**
Whatever.
**[18:53] Bro**
I'm sure the kindhearted Katsura-san
can't sit tight after learning all this.
**[18:57] Bro**
Katsura, you bring Ikumatsu's old man to me.
**[19:00] Kat**
What?
**[19:01] Bro**
Don't get any funny ideas.
**[19:05] Bro**
I control pretty much all
the homeless in this town.
**[19:08] Bro**
I think some starving homeless even camp
out at the dump near the Hokuto Shinken.
**[19:13] Kat**
You knave!
**[19:15] Bro**
This is my revenge.
**[19:17] Bro**
Bring me the head of the
father of the woman you love.
**[19:26] Bum**
Lawd, what should we do?
**[19:29] Bum**
The Lawd was right.
**[19:31] Bum**
Those guys really brought about a disaster.
**[19:34] Bum**
We should've thrown them out right away.
**[19:36] Bum**
Who's Ikumatsu's old man, anyway? I've
never even heard of someone like that.
**[19:40] Mu**
No need to worry.
**[19:42] Mu**
We already found Ikumatsu's father.
**[19:47] Mu**
Hurry up and take this man
in shades to that punk.
**[19:51] Mad**
What're you pulling the Lawd's strings for?!
**[19:54] Mad**
Who're you calling Ikumatsu's old man?!
**[19:56] Kat**
You must endure this, Hasegawa-dono.
**[19:58] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono has practically
been taken hostage.
**[20:01] Kat**
We can't do anything unless we shut
up that knock-off Mercenary Tao.
**[20:04] Mad**
Before that, do something about
this knock-off Commander Ikari!
**[20:08] Mu**
Listen up. Use Shades as a
decoy to distract the enemy.
**[20:13] Mu**
In the meantime, I'll guide these men
outside the park via this secret passage.
**[20:18] Mad**
Why's the Lawd getting into it, too?
**[20:21] Kat**
Lawd...
**[20:23] Mu**
Instead of looking for her father,
**[20:27] Mu**
you must first ensure the daughter's safety.
**[20:31] Mu**
Don't lose sight of your cause.
**[20:33] Mu**
And my cause is... No matter whose
father or how big a scumbag they are,
**[20:38] Mu**
I will protect everyone here!
**[20:40] Mad**
But you're not protecting me at all!
**[20:43] Mu**
We should work together.
**[20:44] Bum**
What are you talking about, Lawd?
**[20:46] Bum**
You're half-senile, fool.
Can you really show them the way?
**[20:49] Mu**
Who're you calling a fool?!
**[20:51] Mu**
I plunged into the straight man
routine the moment I was born!
**[20:53] Mu**
This way! Follow me!
**[20:55] Bum**
Where are you taking a plunge now?!
**[20:58] Bum**
Hey, we'll handle things here,
so take care of the Lawd.
**[21:03] Mad**
In the end, I get to lead
this band of idiots?
**[21:06] Mad**
I'm done with this crap. I'm gonna
leave this place and find a proper job.
**[21:09] Kat**
I still can't believe that homeless
man was Ikumatsu-dono's father.
**[21:14] Kat**
He was going to see her
unbeknownst to all, huh?
**[21:17] Kat**
And he hid who he was due to the
guilt over abandoning his family?
**[21:21] Kat**
In that case, why did he
suddenly stop showing up?
**[21:25] Kat**
Because he'd seen that his daughter
was blessed with happiness?
**[21:28] Gin**
She lost her husband, and now a weird
guy with long hair is stalking her.
**[21:32] Gin**
Nobody would consider her blessed.
**[21:33] Kat**
I never stalked her!
**[21:35] Gin**
Keep it down. What if they hear you?
**[21:37] Gin**
You're not used to straight man
work. Don't push yourself.
**[21:39] Mu**
Yeah! Let me plunge into the
straight man routine instead!
**[21:41] Mad**
Seriously, where do you think
you're taking a plunge?!
**[21:44] Mad**
The Lawd's getting swept away!
**[21:45] Gin**
You've got it wrong, Hasegawa-san.
**[21:47] Gin**
This straight man really wants to
plunge into Ikumatsu's pus—
**[21:50] Mad**
Hey, knock it off!
**[21:51] Mad**
I can't handle these three stooges!
**[21:54] Gin**
H-Help!
**[21:55] Gin**
I... I can't swim!
**[21:55] Kat**
Screw you!
**[21:57] Kat**
When did I say I wanted to plunge into
Ikumatsu-dono's *****, *****, or *******?
**[21:59] Mad**
Look, we don't have time for that!
Help me rescue him!
**[22:03] Mu**
I'll take the plunge instead!
**[22:05] Mad**
Why?!
**[22:06] Mad**
I can't deal with this!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:41] Mad**
Once this chaos blows over,
I'm going to seriously look for a job.
**[23:45] Mad**
I mean it. This isn't a death
flag or anything, okay?
**[23:48] Mad**
I'm serious, by the way.
***SIGN*** A Family
**[23:50] Gin**
Next time: "A Family."
***SIGN*** A series of surprising reveals
***SIGN*** from a complex web of relationships.
***SIGN*** The next episode features so many twists and turns,
***SIGN*** you'll stop worrying about who would ever hire Madao.
# 332 - A Family
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Hokuto Shinken
**[00:06] Kat**
*Every year, late on New Year's Eve,*
**[00:08] Kat**
*a man would visit Ikumatsu's restaurant.*
**[00:14] Kat**
*He would always order a bowl of ramen,*
**[00:17] Kat**
*say, "I can't eat this much,"*
**[00:21] Kat**
* divide it into three portions, and share*
* them with Ikumatsu-dono and her husband.*
**[00:28] Kat**
*However, as time passed and her husband died,*
**[00:32] Kat**
*the man stopped showing up.*
**[00:35] Kat**
*Just who was he?*
**[00:40] Kat**
* We investigated, using the scarf he*
* forgot at the restaurant as a clue,*
**[00:45] Kat**
* and the truth was brought to light*
* through the word of an unexpected source.*
**[00:51] Kat**
* That man was Ikumatsu-dono's*
* father, Nishiki Matsugoro.*
**[00:59] Kat**
* Ikumatsu-dono thought he*
* had died 20 years ago,*
**[01:05] Kat**
* but he was actually still alive*
* and living somewhere around here.*
**[01:11] Kat**
*Who is Ikumatsu-dono's father?*
**[01:14] Kat**
* Why didn't he tell his*
* daughter who he was?*
**[01:17] Kat**
*And why did he disappear?*
**[01:23] Mad**
Seriously, where do you think
you're taking a plunge?!
**[01:25] Gin**
You've got it wrong, Hasegawa-san.
**[01:26] Mad**
The Lawd's getting swept away!
**[01:27] Gin**
This straight man really wants to
plunge into Ikumatsu's pus—
**[01:30] Mad**
Hey, knock it off!
**[01:32] Mad**
I can't handle these three stooges!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** A Family
**[03:11] Mad**
What's wrong with you guys?
**[03:15] Mad**
I don't know who you came here to look for,
**[03:17] Mad**
but forget about all this once
you get back to the surface.
**[03:20] Mad**
Here, eat some bread crust.
**[03:25] Mad**
Like I said, everyone there wants
to forget about their past.
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[03:30] Mad**
Nothing good will come out of digging it up.
**[03:35] Mad**
Actually, I guess it's still
okay if they *want* to forget.
**[03:44] Mad**
Some of them have pasts that they
can't remember even if they want to.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[03:52] Oso**
I'm sorry.
**[03:54] Oso**
I actually kept something from you.
**[03:59] Oso**
And from the young miss, too.
**[04:01] Shin**
You kept something from us?
**[04:03] Oso**
But you seem to be trusted
friends of the young miss,
**[04:07] Oso**
so I figured I should tell you.
**[04:10] Oso**
Someone once came looking for
the master, just like you did.
**[04:17] (Flashback) H**
Why?!
**[04:20] (Flashback) H**
Why won't you tell Ikumatsu
the truth, Mother?
**[04:25] (Flashback) H**
She'll continue to have the wrong
impression about her father for—
**[04:28] (Flashback) Mo**
And that's fine.
**[04:31] (Flashback) Mo**
He really did die once.
**[04:33] (Flashback) Mo**
And he abandoned Ikumatsu
and me in the process.
**[04:35] (Flashback) H**
But he didn't!
**[04:37] (Flashback) H**
All he did was forget...
**[04:39] (Flashback) H**
And all because he saved someone.
**[04:45] (Flashback) Mo**
Then what do you want me to tell her?
**[04:49] (Flashback) Mo**
That her admirable father
**[04:52] (Flashback) Mo**
saved some kid drowning in the river
**[04:57] (Flashback) Mo**
and disappeared?
**[05:03] (Flashback) Mo**
And when we finally found him,
**[05:06] (Flashback) Mo**
he'd forgotten all about us
and had married another woman?
**[05:15] (Flashback) Mo**
The man we knew no longer exists.
**[05:19] (Flashback) Mo**
It was all too late.
**[05:22] (Flashback) Mo**
I believe that this is the best choice to
make for both his sake and Ikumatsu's.
**[05:32] Mad**
Apparently, that geezer
lost all his memories.
**[05:39] Mad**
Memory impairment, was it?
**[05:41] Mad**
Whatever happens one day, he forgets by
the time he wakes up the next morning.
**[05:46] Mad**
And after moving from place to place,
he found his way to the waste dump.
**[05:52] Mad**
That geezer had no idea about his
past or his family, but one day,
**[05:56] Mad**
a man showed up in front of him.
**[06:00] (Flashback) H**
I finally found you.
**[06:03] (Flashback) H**
I looked all over for you.
**[06:05] (Flashback) H**
You probably won't remember me,
**[06:09] (Flashback) H**
but I have never forgotten
what you did for me.
**[06:13] (Flashback) H**
If you can't remember, you don't have to.
**[06:16] (Flashback) H**
And if you don't want to come
with me, I won't force you.
**[06:22] (Flashback) H**
But even if it's just one bowl, could
you please come have our ramen?
**[06:28] (Flashback) H**
I know this is nowhere near
enough to repay my debt to you.
**[06:33] (Flashback) H**
I know it won't make up for
my sin of doing this to you.
**[06:38] (Flashback) H**
But I want you to come see how
well your daughter is doing!
**[06:45] (Flashback) H**
That's my one wish as the boy
whose life you saved back then!
**[06:52] (Flashback) H**
Ikumatsu.
**[06:53] (Flashback) H**
This is our restaurant's
year-end tradition now.
**[06:58] (Flashback) ---**
Should anything happen to me,
make sure you keep it going.
**[07:04] Mad**
I hear the geezer didn't pay much
attention to the man's tearful plea.
**[07:11] Mad**
But every time New Year's Eve came around,
he would go off somewhere by himself.
**[07:16] Mad**
It's strange.
**[07:18] Mad**
He'd lost pretty much all his memories,
**[07:21] Mad**
but he did remember just one thing.
***SIGN*** 2/8 Soba
**[07:26] (Flashback) Iku**
Dad,
**[07:27] (Flashback) Iku**
are we having just one bowl
of New Year's soba again?
**[07:30] (Flashback) Mo**
Don't be greedy now, Ikumatsu.
**[07:32] (Flashback) Fa**
Your mother's right.
This is more than enough.
**[07:36] (Flashback) Fa**
Besides, if we split it into
three portions like this...
**[07:39] (Flashback) Fa**
There.
**[07:41] (Flashback) Iku**
Can I really have so much to myself, Dad?
**[07:44] (Flashback) Fa**
Go ahead.
**[07:46] (Flashback) Fa**
Your mother and I already ate at work.
**[07:50] (Flashback) Fa**
I can't eat this much.
**[08:03] Oso**
Daigo-sama talked about it so happily.
**[08:07] Oso**
He said they finally got to eat
soba as a family of three again.
**[08:12] Mad**
At this point, on top of his memory
impairment, he's also gone totally senile.
**[08:17] Mad**
Looks like he's forgotten all about
going to that ramen restaurant, too.
**[08:23] Mus**
I can't eat this much.
**[08:29] Mus**
Want some?
**[08:32] Mad**
But he still hasn't forgotten
about that, or so I hear.
**[08:39] Gin**
Forgot everything?
**[08:41] Gin**
That's not true.
**[08:45] Kat**
If he remembers that much...
**[08:47] Gin**
...it's more than enough.
**[08:49] Mad**
Gin-san... Zuracchi...
**[08:52] Bro**
Is that Ikumatsu's old man?
**[08:56] Mad**
Wh-Why are you guys here?!
**[08:59] Bro**
Don't go looking down on the
homeless information network.
**[09:02] Bro**
I knew you'd make a move, Katsura.
**[09:08] Bro**
Don't worry.
**[09:09] Bro**
I've sent Ikumatsu an invitation, too.
**[09:12] Bro**
After all, she is the main
heroine in my revenge story.
**[09:21] Kat**
That'd be a problem.
**[09:25] Kat**
We just called that restaurant
**[09:29] Kat**
and made a reservation...
**[09:35] Kat**
For a bowl of ramen.
**[09:54] Iku**
You kids...
**[10:00] Kag**
Wow.
**[10:01] Kag**
When did this restaurant get popular enough
to have people lining up, Matsu-nee?
**[10:05] Shin**
Too bad.
**[10:06] Shin**
And here we thought it was a hole
in the wall that only we knew about.
**[10:09] Shin**
Did people finally realize how
good the food here tastes?
**[10:12] G**
Enough of your nonsense, you brats!
**[10:14] G**
Do you have a death wish? Outta our way!
**[10:16] Kag**
Cutting in line isn't nice.
**[10:18] Kag**
Sorry, but we have a reservation.
**[10:20] Shin**
Ikumatsu-san.
**[10:22] Shin**
Can we get a bowl of ramen on the double?
**[10:26] Shin**
We've got a delivery order.
**[10:29] Kag**
To an unknown address...
**[10:33] Shin**
Nishiki Matsugoro-san's residence.
**[10:38] Bro**
Katsura, are you thinking of
not handing that geezer over?
**[10:42] Kat**
Even if I did listen to you,
**[10:44] Kat**
I don't believe scum like you
would leave Ikumatsu-dono alone.
**[10:50] Bro**
You're right. That's the way I like it.
**[10:53] Kat**
Father, could you entrust
yourself to us for a while?
**[10:58] Kat**
We swear to help you eat
Ikumatsu-dono's ramen one more time.
**[11:03] Bro**
What can a samurai who ended up
homeless and abandoned his sword do?
**[11:07] Bro**
Go!
**[11:08] Bro**
Get them, old man and all!
**[11:10] Kat**
A sword isn't a samurai's only weapon!
**[11:15] Mad**
Forget the samurai crap! That's not a weapon!
**[11:17] Kat**
Here we go, Father!
**[11:19] Mad**
Where? Is that what you meant
by entrusting himself to you?!
**[11:21] G**
What's wrong with you?
Don't you wanna save that geezer?
**[11:25] Gin**
To a samurai, everything
within his reach is a weapon,
**[11:27] Gin**
a hammer to crush scumbags like you!
**[11:30] Mad**
People who call human beings
hammers are much bigger scumbags!
**[11:34] Mus**
Getting out of here takes priority.
**[11:35] Mus**
Please hang in there, Father.
**[11:37] Mad**
Hey! His senility's getting even worse!
**[11:41] Gin**
Tch.
**[11:42] Gin**
The old man's head is gonna be empty by
the time we get him to Ikumatsu's place.
**[11:46] Mad**
That's your fault!
**[11:48] Gin**
If we waste too much time,
Ikumatsu'll be in danger, too.
**[11:50] Gin**
Oh, well.
**[11:52] Gin**
I'll let you hog the spotlight, Zura.
**[11:54] Gin**
Get going, before the ramen gets soggy.
**[11:58] Kat**
Nonsense. There's no spotlight left to hog.
**[12:05] Kat**
We were simply led here by the
two men who loved Ikumatsu-dono.
**[12:12] Kat**
All we can do is sip on
their leftover ramen soup.
**[12:18] Kat**
Maybe we never had a role
to play in this at all.
**[12:23] Kat**
Because Ikumatsu-dono only
has eyes for one man.
**[12:30] Gin**
But even then,
**[12:32] Gin**
if the two men's feelings reach her,
**[12:34] Gin**
then whether his own
feelings reach her or not,
**[12:38] Gin**
the third guy's still gonna go, right?
**[12:41] Gin**
For the sake of his beloved Ikumatsu's ramen.
**[12:45] Kat**
Not ramen. Soba.
**[12:48] Kat**
But I've eaten enough to get sick of it.
**[12:51] Kat**
Leftover soup will be enough to fill me up.
**[12:54] Gin**
That so?
**[12:56] Gin**
Then get going and sip on that leftover
soup or a body shot or whatever!
**[13:02] Bro**
Hold it, Katsura!
**[13:03] Gin**
Whoa there.
**[13:04] Gin**
You're dealing with me.
**[13:07] Gin**
Let's play nice as fellow lonely extras.
**[13:09] Bro**
My targets are Katsura and Ikumatsu!
**[13:12] Bro**
I couldn't care less about y—
**[13:15] G**
Boss!
**[13:17] Gin**
Did you not hear me?
**[13:19] Gin**
I'm saying he's too good to
be taking on trash like you.
**[13:24] Gin**
Did you guys know?
**[13:25] Gin**
The people who were at rock bottom in
the lower world can make it to the top here.
**[13:32] Gin**
I don't know how far down
you pieces of trash got...
**[13:35] Gin**
It's gonna be great, huh, Hasegawa-san?
**[13:38] Gin**
The hole this guy and me fell into
is a bottomless pit of despair.
**[13:45] Gin**
*Zura...*
**[13:47] Gin**
* You're no different from*
* those two, if you ask me.*
**[13:52] Gin**
*All of you are nothing but morons.*
**[14:00] Shin**
Go!
**[14:07] Iku**
*Why did I forget?*
**[14:12] Iku**
*Why didn't I remember?*
**[14:16] Iku**
*I loved him so much...*
**[14:20] Iku**
* When did I lock him away in*
* the depths of my memories?*
**[14:28] (Flashback) Iku**
I feel like we could clearly see what
was important when we were poor.
**[14:34] (Flashback) Iku**
If it weren't for that, I'm sure his
eyes wouldn't have strayed from us.
**[14:41] Iku**
*I was the one who abandoned her dear family.*
**[14:45] Iku**
* He watched over me for years,*
* even though he'd lost his memories.*
**[14:52] Iku**
* And he brought us together*
* in order to tell me that.*
**[14:58] Iku**
*But I...*
**[15:11] Iku**
* Dad, I'm sure you've already forgotten*
* about such an awful daughter,*
**[15:19] Iku**
* along with the taste of the bowl of*
* soba the three of us shared as a family.*
**[15:23] Iku**
*But that's okay.*
**[15:24] Iku**
*That's all right.*
**[15:29] Iku**
*This time, I promise not to forget.*
**[15:33] Iku**
*My eyes will never stray again.*
**[15:37] Iku**
*So please, Dad, just one more time...*
**[15:42] Iku**
*Just one more bowl...*
**[15:45] Kat**
Ikumat—
**[15:56] Mu**
*Ikumatsu.*
**[15:59] Mu**
*I can't eat this much.*
**[16:03] Mu**
*It's all right.*
**[16:06] Mu**
*Ikumatsu...*
**[16:08] Mu**
*I already ate with everyone.*
**[16:13] Mu**
*I'm already full.*
**[16:17] Mu**
*So share this ramen...*
**[16:21] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono!
**[16:23] Mu**
* ...with the people dear to you,*
* the ones standing by your side.*
**[16:24] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono!
**[16:33] Mu**
*That's what both Daigo-kun and I want.*
**[16:39] Mu**
*Really...*
**[16:44] Mu**
*I'm so full.*
**[17:04] Iku**
* Was it really his voice*
* that I heard back then?*
**[17:08] Iku**
*Did he really still remember me?*
**[17:12] Iku**
*There's no way to tell anymore.*
**[17:15] Iku**
* All I can say is that if it weren't for*
* him, I couldn't have met my husband.*
**[17:21] Iku**
* I couldn't have survived*
* and seen these guys again.*
**[17:25] Iku**
*That much, I know for sure.*
**[17:29] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono.
**[17:30] Kat**
I asked for soba. I don't
remember ordering ramen.
**[17:35] Iku**
Really?
**[17:36] Iku**
Men shouldn't nitpick.
**[17:38] Iku**
Look at your stupidly long hair.
**[17:40] Iku**
You should get a crew cut already.
**[17:42] Kat**
What does my hair have to do with this?
**[17:44] Iku**
This is a ramen restaurant, y'know?
**[17:46] Iku**
Wouldn't hurt you to have some
ramen for once, would it?
**[17:49] Iku**
Or do you mean to say one idiot
eating New Year's ramen is enough?
**[17:57] Iku**
Why did you, Gin-san, and the
kids stop showing up after that?
**[18:02] Kat**
I owed them one, you see.
**[18:05] Kat**
So they made me look for something
they lost and whatnot.
**[18:08] Kat**
They drove me like a slave.
**[18:11] Iku**
Lies.
**[18:13] Iku**
I bet you stayed away out
of needless concern for me.
**[18:16] Iku**
So distant.
**[18:19] Iku**
At least let me thank you...
**[18:21] Iku**
You could at least let me make
you some ramen on the house!
**[18:25] Kat**
I don't see why we must be thanked or fed
ramen by someone with such a sad face.
**[18:34] Iku**
Please eat that.
**[18:37] Iku**
You're the only one left.
**[18:39] Iku**
I went through the trouble of making it...
I waited all this while...
**[18:44] Iku**
But the family I wanted to feed it to
**[18:50] Iku**
are all gone now.
**[18:55] Kat**
All the more reason not to eat it, then.
**[18:58] Kat**
I don't have the right to.
I'll come some other time.
**[19:07] Kat**
Ikumatsu-dono.
**[19:09] Kat**
There's just one thing I want to say.
**[19:12] Kat**
I couldn't possibly bring
myself to eat that ramen...
**[19:17] Kat**
But even if we can't share ramen as family,
**[19:21] Kat**
we can share your suffering as friends.
**[19:26] Kat**
Let us know when you want to
look for something you lost.
**[19:31] Kat**
Also, let me make this clear.
**[19:34] Kat**
It's not like I hate ramen.
**[19:40] Kat**
It's just...
**[19:43] Bo**
I can't eat that much.
**[20:01] Iku**
*Late on New Year's Eve,*
**[20:04] Iku**
*that man ordered a bowl of ramen.*
**[20:11] Iku**
*"I can't eat this much."*
**[20:14] Iku**
*Saying that, he took his ramen...*
**[20:28] Iku**
*and divided it into six portions.*
**[22:10] Mad**
* I've tripped and stumbled my*
* way through life until now.*
**[22:15] Mad**
* So at least in the end,*
* I'll stay far away from the dirt*
**[22:19] Mad**
*and fly high toward the blue sky above.*
***SIGN*** Life, Death, and Shades
**[22:30] Gol**
Don't do it. You'll be mincemeat
if you fall from this high up.
**[22:34] Gol**
Put yourself in the shoes of the man
who runs the BBQ place down there.
**[22:37] Mad**
Don't get the wrong idea.
**[22:38] Mad**
I just want to know if I
still have the wings to fly.
**[22:43] Mad**
And I came here to find out, is all.
**[22:46] Gol**
Dunno what happened, but surely you have
family and friends who will mourn you.
**[22:51] Gol**
Most of all, if you died here,
it'd cause problems for me.
**[22:57] Gol**
Life is precious. Don't throw it away.
**[23:05] Gol**
Didn't you hear me?
**[23:07] Gol**
If you cause a fuss here,
everything will be ruined.
**[23:11] Gol**
Life is precious. Don't waste that gift.
**[23:14] Mad**
Look who's talking!
**[23:17] Mad**
You totally wanna lay waste to a life!
**[23:19] Mad**
You're totally trying to kill someone,
right? You're an assassin, aren't you?!
**[23:22] Gol**
Don't get the wrong idea.
I'm just here to hunt boars.
**[23:24] Mad**
From how far away are you
trying to hunt boars?!
**[23:28] Mad**
Really, don't be stupid.
Don't commit a murder.
**[23:31] Gol**
I don't wanna hear that from a suicidal man.
**[23:32] Mad**
I don't wanna hear that from an assassin!
**[23:34] Gol**
I don't wanna hear that from a
man wearing filthy-ass shades.
**[23:35] Mad**
I don't wanna hear that from
a man wearing lame-ass shades!
**[23:37] Gol**
Your shades are more lame.
**[23:38] Mad**
Nah, your shades are more lame.
**[23:41] Gol**
Let me be honest.
**[23:43] Gol**
I couldn't care less what kind of shades
you wear, or when and where you wear them.
**[23:46] Mad**
We're talking about shades now?!
***SIGN*** The next episode
***SIGN*** will go something like that.
***SIGN*** Hasegawa wants to take off ahead of schedule.
***SIGN*** Next time, find out if he gains wings.
***SIGN*** And it won't just be about shades.
***SIGN*** We'll also run a story about cops.
# 333 - Life, Death, and Shades / All the Answers Can Be Found in the Field
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[01:34] Gol**
Don't do it. You'll be mincemeat
if you fall from this high up.
**[01:38] Mad**
Don't get the wrong idea.
**[01:39] Mad**
I just want to know if I
still have the wings to fly.
**[01:44] Mad**
And I came here to find out, is all.
**[01:49] Gol**
Life is precious. Don't throw it away.
***SIGN*** Life, Death, and Shades
**[01:55] Mad**
Look who's talking!
**[01:57] Mad**
You totally wanna lay waste to a life!
**[01:59] Mad**
You're totally trying to kill someone,
right? You're an assassin, aren't you?!
**[02:02] Gol**
Don't get the wrong idea.
I'm just here to hunt boars.
**[02:04] Mad**
From how far away are you
trying to hunt boars?!
**[02:08] Mad**
Really, don't be stupid.
Don't commit a murder.
**[02:11] Gol**
I don't wanna hear that from a suicidal man.
**[02:12] Mad**
I don't wanna hear that from an assassin!
**[02:13] Gol**
I don't wanna hear that from a
man wearing filthy-ass shades.
**[02:15] Mad**
I don't wanna hear that from
a man wearing lame-ass shades!
**[02:17] Gol**
Your shades are more lame.
**[02:18] Mad**
Nah, your shades are more lame.
**[02:21] Gol**
Let me be honest.
**[02:23] Gol**
I couldn't care less what kind of shades
you wear, or when and where you wear them.
**[02:26] Mad**
We're talking about shades now?!
**[02:28] Gol**
Besides, do you really
have it in you to jump?
**[02:34] Gol**
You've been doing this every
day for the past month.
**[02:41] Mad**
Even though I want to die,
**[02:43] Mad**
thinking about shades smashing into
the ground makes my shades tremble.
**[02:49] Mad**
You're an assassin, right?
**[02:51] Mad**
Do you know a way to die that isn't scary
or sad and doesn't hurt or break shades?
**[02:55] Gol**
You're basically saying you don't wanna die.
**[02:58] Mad**
If nothing else, I want my shades to live on!
**[03:01] Gol**
Can't you just take them off before you die?
**[03:03] Gol**
I'm an assassin, you know.
**[03:04] Gol**
If I stop to think about how my
victims feel, I couldn't do my—
**[03:07] Mad**
Oh, I know!
**[03:08] Mad**
I could just have you kill me!
**[03:11] Gol**
Wha—
**[03:11] Mad**
You could send me to heaven in one shot,
without letting me feel any pain or fear!
**[03:16] Gol**
Screw you. Do you have any idea how much
money is involved in each of my shots?
**[03:20] Gol**
I don't waste my rounds.
**[03:22] Gol**
Be it when I'm killing my targets
**[03:23] Gol**
or when I'm making love to women.
**[03:26] Gol**
All it takes is one shot.
It's over in an instant.
**[03:29] G**
Huh? Done already, CEO?
**[03:31] Gol**
That's my creed.
***SIGN*** One and Done
**[03:33] Gol**
and that's where my moniker of
"One and Done Synshen" comes from.
***SIGN*** Synshen
**[03:36] Mad**
They're just mocking you for
shooting your load early!
**[03:39] Mad**
Guess I'll have to kill myself
right here and now, then.
**[03:41] Gol**
Wait, wait.
**[03:42] Gol**
How about this?
**[03:43] Gol**
You head to the roof of that skyscraper now.
***SIGN*** Welcome to Earth!!
**[03:46] Gol**
My target is taking part in
a welcoming party there.
**[03:49] Mad**
You're really hunting a boar?!
**[03:51] Gol**
Once I give the signal, jump off the roof.
**[03:55] Gol**
When you fall into my crosshairs
that will be aimed at my target,
***SIGN*** Me
***SIGN*** Boar
**[03:58] Gol**
I will pierce you both through with one shot.
**[04:00] Gol**
That should do, right?
**[04:01] Mad**
Aren't you making this too hard for yourself?
**[04:04] Mad**
And the shades are being
smashed to bits anyway!
**[04:08] Mad**
I guess around here is fine.
**[04:10] Mad**
Now I just have to wait for the signal.
**[04:13] Mad**
With this, I can finally go to heaven—
**[04:14] Gol2**
Don't do it.
**[04:16] Gol2**
You'll be mincemeat if you
fall from this high up.
**[04:18] Gol2**
Put yourself in the shoes of the lady
who runs the cutlet place down there.
**[04:21] Gol2**
Actually, before all that...
**[04:25] Gol2**
Life is precious. Don't throw it away.
**[04:27] Mad**
*Really?! Here, too?!*
**[04:29] Mad**
*There's an assassin here, too?!*
**[04:32] Gol2**
If you don't want to die, leave at once.
**[04:35] Mad**
*But I do want to die!*
**[04:37] Gol2**
I hear that One and Done Synshen
is targeting this building.
**[04:41] Mad**
* Could he be an assassin hired*
* by Synshen's enemy to kill him?*
**[04:45] Mad**
* I have to go tell him right now, or the*
* assassin who's gonna kill me will lose his...*
**[04:50] Mad**
Wait.
**[04:54] Gol2**
I see. Synshen is on that rooftop.
**[04:58] Gol2**
I must thank you for telling me.
**[05:00] Mad**
Oh, you can just shoot
me in the head in return.
**[05:05] Gol2**
Sorry, but I can't do that.
**[05:07] Gol2**
Even an assassin has his creed.
**[05:09] Gol2**
The only people I kill are
scumbags like Synshen.
**[05:13] Gol2**
Be it targets or women,
**[05:15] Gol2**
I don't go after those on
the straight and narrow.
**[05:17] G**
Huh? Done already, CEO?
**[05:19] Gol2**
That's where my moniker
"Quickdraw Synron" comes from.
***SIGN*** Quickdraw
***SIGN*** Synron
**[05:22] Mad**
Your moniker has nothing
to do with your creed!
**[05:24] Mad**
Are all assassins too
quick to shoot their loads?
**[05:26] Gol2**
How about we do this?
**[05:27] Gol2**
You head back to that building
**[05:30] Gol2**
and lure Synshen somewhere I can snipe him
**[05:34] Gol2**
using a scummy tactic.
**[05:36] Gol2**
If you do that, I promise to shoot
both you scumbags in the head.
**[05:41] Mad**
*This has gotten even more complicated!*
**[05:44] Mad**
*I came here to die!*
**[05:46] Mad**
* Why am I playing accomplice*
* in an assassination?!*
**[05:50] Mad**
S-Synshen...
**[05:52] Mad**
They got me.
**[05:54] Mad**
Run away.
**[05:56] Mad**
The enemy already has the
entire city under its control.
**[06:00] Mad**
I wanted to let you know that
your life is in grave danger...
**[06:06] Gol**
Hey, hang in there!
**[06:08] Mad**
B-Before I die, could you take me up there?
**[06:13] Gol**
Just wait.
**[06:14] Mad**
*Hell yeah! He fell for it!*
**[06:17] Gol**
I'll get you to a hospital right away.
**[06:19] Mad**
No, forget that. Just take
me up there before I die.
**[06:23] Gol**
You moron! Don't be so quick
to say you're gonna die!
**[06:26] Mad**
*Why is he so full of passion?!*
**[06:28] Gol**
I told you that I'd kill you.
**[06:30] Gol**
Don't you dare die until then.
**[06:31] Mad**
*He's a much nicer guy than I thought!*
**[06:34] Mad**
W-Wait. Aren't you a professional assassin?
**[06:37] Mad**
Are you sure you should
leave your job unfinished?
**[06:39] Gol**
What do you think is more important?
A job, or a person's life?
**[06:42] Mad**
* And who was it that was taking*
* people's lives on the job?*
**[06:46] Gol**
Damn those scumbags.
**[06:47] Mad**
* Uh, you're the scumbag.*
* Don't forget where you stand.*
**[06:50] Gol**
First they take my sister, and now
they want to take my friend, too?
**[06:53] Mad**
*When did we become friends?!*
**[06:56] Gol**
What's going on?
**[06:58] Gol**
Is there a sniper on that rooftop, too?
**[07:00] Mad**
* Sorry, Synron-san!*
* This is as far as I can go!*
**[07:02] Mad**
*I mean, he's actually a really nice guy!*
**[07:05] Gol**
I'll be the decoy.
**[07:06] Gol**
In the meantime, you use this
to take out that sniper.
**[07:09] Mad**
*Asking a half-dead guy to kill someone?*
**[07:11] Mad**
* I can't tell if he's a nice*
* guy or a bad guy anymore!*
**[07:14] Gol**
Don't die.
**[07:15] Mad**
*Like I said, I came here to die!*
**[07:18] Mad**
*What the hell is going on?!*
**[07:20] Mad**
*I came here to die!*
**[07:22] Mad**
*I don't care anymore! I'll kill or whatever!*
**[07:25] Mad**
* If I actually try to kill*
* Synron, I'm sure he'll kill me.*
**[07:30] Mad**
*He's already dead!*
**[07:32] Mad**
Hey! What are you doing?
**[07:35] Gol2**
S-Sorry, I screwed up.
**[07:38] Gol2**
I panicked and rushed to kill Synshen,
but I failed to notice my rounds were gone.
**[07:43] Mad**
He took that chance to hit you?
**[07:45] Gol2**
No, like I said...
**[07:48] Gol2**
I lost my rounds.
**[07:50] Mad**
That really is one hell of a screw-up!
**[07:51] Gol2**
If I don't have any rounds, I can't kill you.
**[07:55] Mad**
You don't need those round ones for that.
**[07:57] Gol**
I'm no longer fit to be a sniper.
**[08:00] G**
Huh? Done already, CEO?
**[08:01] Mad**
You were never fit and firing there anyway!
**[08:04] Gol**
But it's fine.
**[08:06] Gol**
Even if I did have the rounds,
I wouldn't have been able to fire.
**[08:10] Gol**
Some scumbag he was.
**[08:12] Gol**
I can't believe he acted like that in front
of his enemy in the middle of a hit job.
**[08:17] Gol**
Do you know why my boss is
being targeted by Synshen?
**[08:21] ---**
This is what people call him behind his back:
**[08:24] ---**
"slave trader."
**[08:26] ---**
The stuff he peddles includes people
**[08:30] ---**
and Synshen's kid sister who was
with him when he was an orphan.
**[08:35] ---**
Only then did he start walking
down the path of a scumbag.
**[08:39] ---**
So when I saw him do that,
I realized something.
**[08:43] ---**
He came here as a brother
trying to save his sister.
**[08:47] ---**
Could you tell him something for me?
**[08:50] ---**
"I don't have the rounds
to shoot you with anymore,
**[08:55] ---**
but I still have enough
to unload into scumbags!"
**[09:00] Mad**
*Unload those into me, not scumbags!*
**[09:04] Mad**
*I'm done with this crap!*
**[09:05] Mad**
*I'm just gonna jump off the roof!*
**[09:11] Gol**
It's been 20 years since we were sold off.
**[09:14] Gol**
Our appearances have changed
completely since then,
**[09:16] Gol**
and we even cast our names aside,
**[09:19] Gol**
but it seems we both chose to walk down
the same path to get our sibling back.
**[09:24] Gol**
You don't have the rounds
to shoot me with anymore?
**[09:26] Gol**
Ichiko, you never had any
round ones to begin with.
**[09:31] Boar**
You siblings would've been
better off killing each other.
**[09:35] Boar**
If you two can't settle things
yourselves, I can help.
**[09:40] Gol**
You were always like that, Ichiko.
**[09:43] Gol**
You loved to dress up like
a boy and play with us.
**[09:49] (Flashback) Gol2**
You're so mean, Ichiro-nii!
**[09:51] (Flashback) Gol2**
I'm out of water here!
**[09:55] (Flashback) Gol**
That's why I keep telling you...
**[09:56] Gol**
You're too quick to shoot your load.
**[09:59] (Flashback) Gol2**
Jeez! How can I win, then?
**[10:02] (Flashback) Gol**
Isn't that obvious?
**[10:06] Gol**
You put everything you have into one shot.
**[10:11] Boar**
Is he going to shoot me
along with his sister?
**[10:14] Gol**
Get ready for my best shot.
**[10:18] Gol**
Because I've already fired it.
**[10:20] Mad**
If you can kill me, I'd like to see you try!
**[10:36] Mad**
Man, in the end...
**[10:40] Mad**
I didn't die!
**[10:49] Gol**
Looks like your wings are still right there.
**[10:56] Mat**
In our job, fieldwork is everything.
***SIGN*** Special Crash Course for Upper Management Candidates
**[11:00] Mat**
But in any organization, the skilled
employees are the first to leave the field
**[11:04] Mat**
and take up leadership roles.
**[11:07] Mat**
All of you master investigators will
learn how the nectar of authority tastes.
**[11:13] Mat**
But I didn't promote you just so you could rot.
**[11:18] Mat**
What I'm basically trying to say is,
**[11:20] Mat**
no matter how far up the ladder you climb,
**[11:23] Mat**
never forget the field where you came from.
**[11:25] Hij**
Pearls of wisdom from the super boss who
spends taxpayer money on cabaret clubs.
**[11:30] Kon**
Don't be like that, Toshi.
**[11:32] Hij**
We don't need a crash course.
We're drowning in fieldwork every day.
**[11:39] Hij**
I mean, we're full of idiots who think
desk work means sleeping on a desk.
**[11:44] Hij**
And who is he calling master investigators?
**[11:47] Hij**
These useless rich kids who landed comfy
jobs using their family names and contacts?
**[11:51] Kon**
Hey, Toshi! They can hear you!
**[11:53] Hij**
I want them to.
**[11:55] Hij**
Oh, sorry. You're a rich kid from
a famous family too, aren't you...
**[12:00] Hij**
Mimawarigumi Chief Sasaki-dono?
**[12:03] Isa**
No need to worry, Shinsengumi
Vice Chief Hijikata-dono.
**[12:08] Isa**
Once I become director-general, I'll effect
elite reform by the elite for the elite.
**[12:14] Isa**
For starters, maybe I should
fire that napping thorny
**[12:16] Isa**
and the dummy spreading secondhand smoke.
**[12:20] Isa**
Don't you agree, Nobume-san?
**[12:23] Hij**
Elite reform, my ass! Your subordinate
is napping in class, too!
**[12:27] Nob**
I'm not napping.
**[12:29] Nob**
I'm snacking.
***SIGN*** Japanese for Good Kids
**[12:30] Hij**
They're both equally bad!
**[12:31] Oki**
Hate to break it to ya,
but I'm not napping, either.
**[12:34] Oki**
I was pretending so people wouldn't figure
out during recess that I have no friends.
**[12:38] Hij**
Why the triumphant look?
**[12:40] Hij**
Why are you two competing over school tropes?
**[12:42] Hij**
Also, a guy messing with his phone during
a lecture has no right to complain to me.
**[12:46] Isa**
I'm merely noting down the important points.
**[12:49] Hij**
And I'm using nicotine to clear
my head so I can pay attention!
**[12:52] Isa**
Crap, game over.
**[12:54] Hij**
So you were just playing a mobile game!
**[12:57] Mat**
Keep it down, you louts!
**[13:00] Mat**
Beat it to the hallway
in under three seconds,
**[13:03] Mat**
or I'll blow your brains out.
**[13:05] Mat**
One...
***SIGN*** All the Answers
Can Be Found in the Field
**[13:07] All**
What happened to two and three?!
***SIGN*** Special Crash Course for Upper Management Candidates
**[13:11] Mat**
So, yeah...
**[13:14] Mat**
We'll have these guys act as guinea pigs,
experience a crime scene, and investigate.
**[13:19] Mat**
It's just a simulation, but I want you
all to rack your brains along with them.
**[13:22] Hij**
I don't care if it's a simulation
or whatever. Bring it on.
**[13:25] Isa**
Yes, though we'd rather not be compared
to these people. Right, Nobume-san?
***SIGN*** Records of the Three Kingdoms
**[13:29] Nob**
If you defeat Cao Cao
early, you lose motivation
**[13:32] Nob**
and stop caring about uniting China.
**[13:34] Oki**
Cao Cao can be the last boss, then.
Whoever defeats Wei first wins.
**[13:38] Kon**
Okay, he said simulation, but not that kind!
**[13:40] Mat**
A fictional crime scene
will be displayed in VR.
**[13:43] Mat**
Analyze the crime using the clues at
the scene and identify the culprit.
**[13:52] Kon**
Wh-What is this?
**[13:54] Kon**
It's like the real thing!
**[13:56] Mat**
This is HQ, you know. We have
all the cutting-edge tech.
**[14:00] Mat**
And we have files on every
kind of case imaginable.
**[14:03] Mat**
This case, based on a massive amount of
data, is no different from the real thing.
**[14:09] Mat**
Here's the gist of it. A corpse
was found on this river bank.
**[14:13] Mat**
An old lady living nearby
was the first to find it.
**[14:16] Mat**
She testified that she was here to do laundry
when she saw it drift by from upstream.
**[14:26] Kon**
What kind of case is this?!
**[14:28] Kon**
HQ's case files clearly have
folktales from Japan mixed in!
**[14:32] Mat**
I hear a similar case happened in the past.
**[14:34] Kon**
Like hell it did! This is Momotaro!
**[14:37] Hij**
We don't know for sure
that this is Momotaro yet.
**[14:40] Kon**
Uh, he obviously is.
He was even inside a peach.
**[14:42] Hij**
Acting on misconceptions
can lead to mistakes.
**[14:45] Kon**
The granny was here to do laundry!
**[14:47] Hij**
Pops, was the peach already
split when it was found?
**[14:51] Mat**
Granny testified that she pulled it out
in this state when it came drifting by.
**[14:55] Kon**
We're actually doing this? We're
investigating this stupid case?
**[14:58] Hij**
That's weird.
**[14:59] Hij**
If he came drifting by in this state,
Momotaro's body should be wet.
**[15:04] Kon**
You just called him Momotaro.
You admitted it is him, right?
**[15:06] Hij**
Also, can an old lady really drag a
peach with an adult inside all this way?
**[15:12] Hij**
There's something off here.
**[15:13] Kon**
Yeah, like an adult being inside a peach!
**[15:16] Hij**
The granny probably wasn't
alone when she found this.
**[15:20] Hij**
What is Gramps's alibi?
**[15:21] Mat**
Cutting grass in the mountains.
**[15:22] Kon**
That was an alibi?!
**[15:24] Kon**
It was something that scary?
***SIGN*** Old Man Possession 1
***SIGN*** Sickle
**[15:26] Hij**
Pops, get us a DNA comparison on
Gramps's sickle and Momotaro's blood.
**[15:30] Kon**
What are you thinking? That's terrifying!
**[15:32] Hij**
The fatal wound matches the
way the peach was split.
**[15:35] Hij**
In other words, he was killed by the
old couple when they split the peach.
**[15:40] Kon**
What the hell kind of folktale is this?!
**[15:42] Hij**
They didn't do it on purpose.
It was an accident.
**[15:45] Hij**
But that's why they fabricated alibis...
**[15:47] Isa**
You're mistaken.
**[15:49] Isa**
It seems you're the one who is
shackled by the story of Momotaro.
**[15:53] Isa**
That's why you overlooked
a vital piece of evidence.
**[15:56] Hij**
What?
**[15:57] Isa**
You're too fixated on the man inside
the peach, the granny's laundry,
**[16:00] Isa**
and Gramps's grass cutting.
**[16:02] Isa**
Hence, you assumed that this tragedy
occurred at the start of the Momotaro story.
**[16:07] Isa**
But that's a mistake. Why, you ask?
**[16:11] Isa**
Ask yourself, why is Momotaro so big when
he was only just born from the peach?
**[16:16] Kon**
You're taking issue with that now?!
**[16:18] Kon**
You ignore the "born from a peach"
thing and take issue with that?!
**[16:21] Kon**
And why are you shocked?!
**[16:23] Isa**
Going from his filthy clothes
and the lack of kibi dango,
**[16:27] Isa**
we can tell that he'd already
finished fighting the ogres.
**[16:31] Isa**
This incident happened
after the end of the story.
**[16:34] Hij**
Then why was he inside a peach again?
**[16:37] Isa**
Look at this wound.
**[16:39] Isa**
There's pretty much no sign of blood loss.
**[16:42] Isa**
This proves that he was already
dead when he got the wound.
**[16:46] Isa**
What that means is...
**[16:48] Isa**
Somebody killed him and
dumped him in the river
**[16:51] Isa**
in order to frame that old couple for murder.
**[16:54] Kon**
Why is this getting so complicated?!
**[16:56] Isa**
It was all camouflage.
**[16:59] Isa**
But thanks to that, we can narrow
down the list of suspects.
**[17:02] Isa**
When you consider Momotaro's
situation after fighting the ogres,
**[17:06] Isa**
the true culprit
**[17:09] Isa**
can only be one of these three.
**[17:12] Isa**
It is said that Momotaro's party
brought back treasure from Onigashima.
**[17:17] Isa**
But we're talking about animals
and a peach-born monster here.
**[17:20] Isa**
It's not hard to picture them
fighting over the treasure.
**[17:24] Kon**
How much must you corrupt Momotaro
before you're satisfied?
**[17:26] Isa**
Among them, the only one who can place
such a cunning trap is the mon—
**[17:29] Oki**
It wasn't the monkey.
**[17:32] Oki**
Shackled by the story of Momotaro,
you overlooked something vital.
**[17:39] Oki**
Monkeys can't use money.
**[17:42] Kon**
Why does Captain Obvious
have such a smug look?!
**[17:44] Kon**
Their reasoning is getting
stupider by the minute!
**[17:47] Kon**
And why do you have a look of shock?!
**[17:49] Oki**
In other words, the real culprit
is either the dog or the pheasant.
**[17:54] Kon**
Dogs and pheasants can't use money, either!
**[17:56] Nob**
You're wrong.
**[17:58] Nob**
None of them is the culprit.
**[18:01] Nob**
You're so shackled by the Momotaro
story that you've gone blind.
**[18:05] Oki**
What? How can you say for sure?
**[18:08] Nob**
Because that'd be a pain.
**[18:10] Kon**
She ultimately wrote it off as a pain!
**[18:13] Kon**
Anyone would look shocked after that!
**[18:16] Hij**
Well, they're all animals either way.
Can't really question them.
**[18:19] Hij**
Pops, I'd like to see the autopsy report.
**[18:21] Hij**
There must be another fatal wound somewhere.
**[18:24] Mat**
Sorry to say this, Toshi,
**[18:26] Mat**
but this is the only external
wound that stands out.
**[18:29] Mat**
However, x-rays did find something
strange in his trachea.
**[18:35] Mat**
Something shaped like a dango.
**[18:37] Kon**
Uh, he totally died choking on kibi dango!
**[18:40] Isa**
This is why I can't stand plebs.
That's not kibi dango.
**[18:42] Isa**
It's what the monkey pooped out
after eating the kibi dango.
**[18:45] Isa**
You know how monkeys throw their own poop?
I knew it, the monkey was the culprit.
**[18:48] Isa**
I was right. An elite was right.
**[18:50] Isa**
Praise the elite.
**[18:51] Kon**
You're not thinking like an elite now!
**[18:52] Hij**
You stupid? The gramps and gran would
obviously be the ones feeding him.
**[18:57] Hij**
Tempted by the treasure, they choked
him to death using kibi dango.
**[19:01] Hij**
The old farts really were
the culprits. I was right.
**[19:03] Hij**
Praise mayonnaise.
**[19:04] Kon**
Didn't you paint them in a
totally different light before?
**[19:06] Isa**
The monkey.
**[19:07] Hij**
Gramps and gran.
**[19:08] Isa**
The monkey.
**[19:09] Hij**
Gramps and gran.
**[19:10] Isa**
The monkey's gramps and gran.
**[19:11] Hij**
Gramps and gran's monkey.
**[19:13] Isa**
We agreed it was the monkey just now, right?
**[19:15] Oki**
Okay, fine. Let's take the middle option
and say it was the eunuch monkey.
**[19:19] Kon**
Middle option of what?
Where'd the gramps and gran go?
**[19:21] Nob**
It can be Monkey and Aska's
gramps and gran, then.
**[19:24] Kon**
Wait, what happened to Chage?
**[19:25] Isa**
At this point, let's settle
this once and for all.
**[19:28] Isa**
Director-General, it doesn't
matter if they're animals.
**[19:31] Isa**
Let us question Momotaro's party.
**[19:33] Mat**
Oh, if you want them...
**[19:37] Mat**
They're in here.
**[19:38] Kon**
All the suspects have been eaten!
**[19:40] Isa**
Wait, are you saying Momotaro
was the perpetrator?
**[19:45] Isa**
I see. So that's how it is.
**[19:49] Isa**
They were stranded on the
way back from Onigashima.
**[19:54] Isa**
The sad fate of his party is proof enough.
**[19:58] Isa**
Instead of treasure, they fought to eat
each other's kibi dango and bodies.
**[20:04] Isa**
And almost like divine punishment,
**[20:08] Isa**
the last bite, his friend's kibi
dango, got caught in his throat.
**[20:14] Isa**
The one who killed him was
none other than himself.
**[20:19] Kon**
No way... That can't be.
**[20:21] Kon**
How can such a laughable cause of
death turn into something so sad?
**[20:27] Kon**
Toshi...
**[20:28] Hij**
This is what the field is like.
**[20:31] Hij**
It shoves harsh realities and even
harsher truths right into our faces.
**[20:37] Hij**
But we must not avert our eyes.
**[20:40] Hij**
As cops, we have the duty to find the
truth even if it's shrouded in darkness.
**[20:47] Kon**
T-Toshi!
**[20:51] Hij**
Look at this.
***SIGN*** No sneaking bites.
**[20:53] Hij**
It's a bag.
**[20:54] Hij**
It likely had kibi dango inside.
**[20:57] Hij**
He probably didn't eat a single dango.
***SIGN*** No sneaking bites.
**[21:02] Hij**
He must've given them all to his friends
and chewed on his sandals or something.
**[21:06] Hij**
But they went down one after another.
**[21:09] Hij**
Considering how he could eat crap like this,
**[21:11] Hij**
he must've ended up being the last one alive.
**[21:14] Hij**
The rest of the story is as you said.
**[21:17] Hij**
He chose that path in order to live.
**[21:20] Hij**
You can't eat a bag like this
unless you have extreme resolve.
**[21:25] Hij**
He must've really wanted to live...
**[21:26] Hij**
His friends' share of life, too.
**[21:29] Kon**
Toshi...
**[21:30] Isa**
Are you saying that sappy crap
was the kind of reality you saw?
**[21:35] Hij**
That's right.
**[21:36] Hij**
This is the truth I believe in,
the truth I found at this crime scene!
**[21:39] Mat**
Bzzt.
**[21:44] Mat**
Too bad. Close, but no cigar.
**[21:48] Mat**
You got the "Momotaro was killed" part right.
**[21:51] Mat**
But this isn't Momotaro.
**[21:56] Mat**
It's the boss of Onigashima, who ate
the entire Momotaro party alive.
**[22:00] Mat**
Disguised as Momotaro, he came to
the mainland to eat more humans...
**[22:05] Mat**
But he died without achieving his goal.
***SIGN*** Cause of Death
**[22:07] Mat**
Basically,
**[22:10] Mat**
the real culprit is a brain tumor. That's it.
**[22:15] Mat**
That's it.
***SIGN*** The End
**[22:17] Mat**
That's it!
***SIGN*** 3000 Leagues in Search of a Scabbard
**[23:50] Gin**
Next time: "3000 Leagues
in Search of a Scabbard."
***SIGN*** Sure, it's been a while since we've seen Tetsuko,
***SIGN*** but she has a fair amount of screen time, like in the live-action movie.
***SIGN*** Perhaps because he treated swords like crap at a smithy,
***SIGN*** Gintoki's butthole gets attacked by one!
# 334 - 3000 Leagues in Search of a Scabbard
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:10] G**
Who goes there?
**[00:14] G**
You must be Senbe the Manslayer.
**[00:18] G**
Prepare to go down!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
**[02:05] Tet**
This is a great sword.
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[02:07] Tet**
It's nameless, but sharp.
**[02:09] Tet**
Looks like it ran wild with
its wielder in the past,
**[02:12] Tet**
but it's being taken care of now.
**[02:15] Tet**
Must belong to a retired general.
**[02:18] Shin**
Tetsuko-san, that sword is actually a
memento of Otose-san's late husband.
**[02:23] Tet**
Oh...
***SIGN*** Smithy
**[02:25] Tet**
I'll deliver it nice and sharpened tomorrow.
**[02:27] Tet**
I'm sure it wants to go home soon, too.
**[02:30] Kag**
Tetsuko, you can talk to
swords? You're amazing!
**[02:35] Tet**
It's not like that.
**[02:36] Kag**
What about that one? What's it saying?
**[02:42] Tet**
The number of battles it's gone through
and the amount of blood it has spilled
**[02:45] Tet**
is way higher than any other sword.
**[02:48] Tet**
But it's been used as a weight for cup
ramen way more than any other sword, too.
**[02:52] Gin**
Man, I feel so much better.
**[02:52] Tet**
Perhaps due to its poor treatment,
I can see it shrouded in malice.
**[02:54] Gin**
I thought I was gonna wet myself.
**[02:56] Kag**
Malice?
**[02:57] Tet**
Yes. Rather than the blood of enemies,
**[03:00] Tet**
it thirsts for the blood of its wielder.
**[03:03] Kag**
Wow, you're right!
**[03:04] Shin**
You can tell when a sword
looks down on its wielder?
**[03:07] Shin**
That's our master swordsmith!
**[03:08] Kag**
Though to be honest, we knew that, too.
**[03:12] Gin**
Master swordsmith, my ass!
**[03:14] Gin**
Why's a drawn sword just
laying around right there?
**[03:17] Gin**
Should a smithy be treating
her products so badly?
**[03:20] Tet**
What's this sword?
**[03:22] Tet**
I don't remember it.
**[03:24] Gin**
Don't play dumb.
**[03:25] Gin**
Are you saying it came here by itself
to get a massage? To rub one out?
**[03:29] Shin**
This is a smithy! Not a brothel!
**[03:32] Kag**
Maybe it got kicked out of its
scabbard due to its low salary.
**[03:35] Kag**
Tetsuko, you should hear
out its complaints, too.
**[03:37] Tet**
Uh, complaints?
**[03:39] Gin**
Even I could hear those out.
**[03:42] Gin**
You seem really up for this, sir.
**[03:43] Gin**
Look at you, all naked
before we even get started.
**[03:46] Gin**
Your scabbard may have dumped you,
but I'll make you forget about it all tonight.
**[03:51] Gin**
And then, you can get a fresh start as
a wok in Gin-san's place tomorrow.
**[03:56] Tet**
Hey, wait!
**[03:57] Gin**
Got that, Tetsuko? Make us a nice wok.
**[03:59] Shin**
What are you doing? We don't
even know whose sword it is yet!
**[04:03] Gin**
Didn't you hear it?
It's sick of cutting things.
**[04:06] Gin**
It wants to stop hurting people
and start frying rice instead.
**[04:09] Gin**
We don't have a pan, so this is perfect.
**[04:11] Shin**
You need a fresh start more
than it does, you bum!
**[04:14] Gin**
Ah, I don't know why, but I think I
can hear the sword crying out in joy.
**[04:19] Shin**
Uh, sorry,
**[04:20] Shin**
but we can hear it, too.
**[04:23] Shin**
I don't know about crying out in joy.
This sounds more like dying screams.
**[04:27] Gin**
Huh? You can hear that, too?
**[04:32] Kus**
Bro...
**[04:35] Kus**
Whaddya think yer doin' ta me?
**[04:36] Kus**
Want me ta suck yer blood up?!
**[04:44] Shin**
Gin-san?!
***SIGN*** 3000 Leagues in Search of a Scabbard
***SIGN*** Smithy
**[04:53] Kus**
Yeesh.
**[04:55] Kus**
There's no tellin' what
samurai these days get up ta.
**[04:59] Kus**
How scary.
**[05:01] Kus**
If I were any other sword, I woulda snapped.
**[05:03] Kus**
Be more careful. Most swords'll
lash out at the drop of a hat.
**[05:06] Kus**
Ya won't find many blunt,
gentle ones like me.
**[05:09] Tet**
S-Sorry about that.
**[05:13] Kus**
Well, as long as ya learned yer lesson.
**[05:16] Kus**
I'm not yellin' at ya 'cause I want ta.
**[05:18] Kus**
Thankfully, nobody got hurt,
**[05:20] Kus**
so let's call this water under the bridge.
**[05:24] Kus**
Well, thanks for the yummy tea. Take care.
**[05:28] Gin**
Like hell! I totally got hurt here!
**[05:31] Gin**
How long are you gonna stay stuck in my ass?
**[05:33] Gin**
And what the hell are you, anyway?
**[05:37] Gin**
What's with this thing? I can't get it out!
**[05:40] Kus**
Yer wastin' yer time, bro. We're a pair now.
**[05:43] Kus**
I finally found ya, my scabbard.
I ain't never lettin' ya go.
**[05:46] Gin**
Did you just call my butthole a scabbard?
**[05:47] Shin**
Calm down, both of you. Calm down.
**[05:50] Gin**
How can I? I've got a sword in my ass!
**[05:53] Kag**
Oh, just shut up and sit down.
**[05:57] Shin**
P-Planet Excalibur?
**[06:00] Kus**
Aye. Believe it or not, I'm an actual Amanto,
**[06:03] Kus**
Kusanagi from Planet Excalibur.
**[06:06] Tet**
K-Kusanagi-san?
**[06:08] Kus**
I may be loiterin' about butt-naked
without a scabbard now,
**[06:11] Kus**
but when I was young, I was a famous sword.
**[06:14] Shin**
Uh, could you stop talking about
loitering butt-naked with that name?
**[06:17] Kus**
Us excaliburlings have bodies
made of liquid metal.
**[06:20] Kus**
In other words, we can transform
inta anythin' we wanna be.
**[06:24] Kus**
We've transformed inta all kinds of weapons
**[06:26] Kus**
and taken part in wars on all
kinds of planets as mercenaries.
**[06:31] Kus**
I came ta Earth a long time
ago when I smelled war here.
**[06:36] Kus**
Ever since, me and my wife Scabberina
had been livin' as a very lovin' couple.
**[06:40] Shin**
Who the hell is Scabberina?
**[06:42] Shin**
Was your scabbard your wife?
**[06:44] Kus**
She was too good for me, I say.
**[06:47] Kus**
She always welcomed me
back with a warm smile.
**[06:52] Kus**
And back then, I was young, too.
**[06:54] Kus**
I thrust in and out of
her several times a day.
**[06:57] Shin**
Stop moving like that. What are you saying?
**[06:59] Shin**
Is it what I think it is?
**[07:00] Kag**
If you had such a beloved scabbard,
why are you naked now, Member Kusanagi?
**[07:04] Shin**
Stop calling him that!
**[07:06] Tet**
A sword and its scabbard are as one.
**[07:08] Tet**
They're like SM*P, which only functions
when all its members are present.
**[07:11] Shin**
You two are doing this
on purpose, aren't you?!
**[07:13] Kus**
As time passed and I grew
older, I lost my edge.
**[07:19] Kus**
Our owner put us up for sale at a pawn shop.
**[07:23] Kus**
For some reason, a buyer
was found immediately,
**[07:25] Kus**
but I was dumped in a ditch.
**[07:28] Kus**
The buyer only wanted the
beautiful Scabberina, not me.
**[07:34] Kus**
For decades since then,
I've been lookin' for her,
**[07:38] Kus**
but I still have no idea where she is now.
**[07:41] Kus**
I went from smithy ta smithy,
hopin' ta meet a good scabbard,
**[07:45] Kus**
but that was a swing and a miss, too.
**[07:47] Tet**
So that's why you came to me?
**[07:49] Kus**
I lost my owner and my partner
'cause I was so dull.
**[07:52] Kus**
So I gotta take them back
with my own hands...
**[07:57] Kus**
The bright light from those days,
and my beloved other half.
**[08:02] Kus**
But I know from the bottom of my blade that
I can't do anythin' as a lone dull blade.
**[08:07] Kus**
Doesn't matter if it's just a temporary
home. I need an owner, a scabbard!
**[08:11] Kus**
I beg of ya, lend me yer ass for a while.
**[08:15] Kus**
C'mon, please.
**[08:18] Shin**
Okay! Come one, come all!
**[08:21] Shin**
Is the sword on your hip a
treasure that brings good luck
**[08:25] Shin**
or a curse that brings misfortune?
**[08:28] Shin**
Don't you want to know?
***SIGN*** Sword Fortune Telling
**[08:30] Kag**
Edo's best swordsmith, Murata Tetsuko,
will ascertain your sword's quality!
**[08:36] Shin**
And we're willing to bleed
money on the first day!
**[08:39] Shin**
We'll look at your swords for free today!
**[08:41] Shin**
First come, first served!
**[08:43] Kus**
You guys...
**[08:45] Tet**
In truth, we want to check out not
the swords, but their scabbards.
**[08:49] Kus**
Instead of just givin' me this
filthy ass, you'd go so far for me?
**[08:54] Tet**
I'm not doing this for you.
**[08:56] Tet**
I'm a swordsmith.
**[08:58] Tet**
When there's a rusty sword of
repute lying in front of me,
**[09:01] Tet**
do you really think I could
stop myself from sharpening it?
**[09:03] Kus**
T-Tetsuko-han!
**[09:07] Tet**
I'll lend you as many filthy asses as
you want, so just shut up and sit tight.
**[09:12] Kus**
Sorry. I forgot I was lugging
this filthy ass around.
**[09:18] Gin**
Who do you think this filthy ass belongs to?
**[09:20] Gin**
What gives you guys the right to
decide the fate of my filthy ass?
**[09:23] Gin**
Wait, whose ass are you calling filthy?
**[09:25] Shin**
Not like we have a choice.
**[09:26] Shin**
He says he won't leave your
ass until he finds a home.
**[09:30] Kag**
If you wanna be freed, we gotta
find his separated scabbard.
**[09:34] Gin**
Quit messing—
**[09:35] Shin**
Oh, by the way, excaliburlings
are vampiric in nature.
**[09:39] Shin**
If you do anything stupid...
**[09:41] Kus**
Want me to suck up the
blood from yer entire body?
**[09:45] Gin**
Excuse me.
**[09:47] Gin**
Would you like to be the
scabbard for my sword?
**[09:51] G**
Eek!
**[09:53] Kus**
C'mon, bro. Yer makin' yer
ulterior motives too obvious.
**[09:56] Kus**
Ya'll never find me a scabbard like that.
**[09:58] Gin**
I don't wanna hear that from the one
sticking butt-naked into my butt.
**[10:01] Kus**
Just watch me.
**[10:03] Kus**
Hey, lady.
**[10:04] Kus**
Want me to suck yer ********* *****?
**[10:06] G**
Eek!
**[10:08] Gin**
I'll kill your blunt ass!
**[10:10] Gin**
Why are you getting me beaten up?
**[10:12] Gin**
Why do I have to do this?
**[10:14] Kus**
Crap, I messed up. Shoulda gone
with "please suck my ****."
**[10:17] Shin**
What kind of scabbard are you looking for?!
**[10:19] Shin**
Nobody cares about the swords in your pants!
**[10:21] Shin**
Stick them in Tasty Stick
packaging or something!
**[10:24] Shin**
Aren't you looking for your wife Scabberina?
**[10:27] Shin**
Why are you trying to sneakily
find a new scabbard?
**[10:30] Shin**
Take this more seriously!
**[10:32] Shin**
If you wanna find customers, talk
to people who are carrying swords!
**[10:37] Gin**
Ow, ow... Hey, what are you doing?
**[10:41] Kus**
N-Nah, i-it a-ain't me.
**[10:42] Kus**
Th-This is resonance.
**[10:45] Gin**
What?
**[10:46] Kus**
O-One of my own is nearby.
**[10:49] Shin**
Huh? Could it be Scabberina?
**[10:51] Kus**
N-Nah.
**[10:53] Sen**
Is it true that you're ascertaining
the quality of swords?
**[10:57] Sen**
I'd love it if you could check mine as well.
**[11:00] Sen**
What do you see?
**[11:02] Sen**
Do you hear the screams of
all the people I've cut down?
**[11:06] Sen**
Or do you hear the sound of all
the swords he's devoured breaking?
**[11:14] Sen**
Whoops, looks like we
have an unwanted visitor.
**[11:17] Sen**
I'll come back some other time.
**[11:19] Sen**
I'm sure we'll meet again.
**[11:23] Gin**
What was with that guy?
**[11:25] Shin**
Are you sure, Kusanagi-san?
**[11:27] Shin**
That was an excaliburling, too, right?
**[11:30] Shin**
They might've known
something about Scabberina.
**[11:34] Shin**
N-No way... He'd come ta this planet, too?
**[11:38] Shin**
N-Never get involved with
that guy. He's bad news.
**[11:41] Shin**
Kusanagi-san?
**[11:42] Gin**
Hey, knock it off. My
ass can't take any more.
**[11:45] Gin**
You're not resonating, are you?
You're just trembling in fear!
**[11:46] Oki**
Damn, he got away.
**[11:49] Oki**
Welp, if I go back empty-handed,
Hijikata-san will yell at me.
**[11:54] Oki**
Whatever. There's a perfect replacement.
**[11:56] Oki**
Boss, your usual wooden sword is one thing,
**[11:59] Oki**
but we can't have you carrying
that around during the sword ban.
**[12:02] Oki**
You're under arrest for a Swords and
Firearms Act violation and public indecency.
**[12:07] Gin**
What? Wait, this isn't what you think!
**[12:09] Gin**
Hey, stop clattering and say something!
**[12:13] Kus**
You got it wrong. I ain't tremblin'.
**[12:17] Kus**
I-I found her... I finally found her.
**[12:20] Kus**
That bro's scabbard...
That beautiful scabbard...
**[12:23] Kus**
There's no mistakin' it.
**[12:24] Kus**
It's my wife, Scabberina!
***SIGN*** Special Police
Shinsengumi
**[12:32] Kon**
This is horrible.
**[12:34] Kon**
Have we identified the victim?
**[12:36] Hij**
Probably a Joi Rebel from some faction.
**[12:39] Kon**
The body's in tatters. Is it him again?
**[12:43] Hij**
No doubt about it.
**[12:44] Hij**
The massive cut that couldn't
be inflicted by any mere human,
**[12:48] Hij**
the sword that seems like it
was ripped off at the hilt...
**[12:52] Hij**
It has to be Senbe the Manslayer.
**[12:55] Kon**
The mad sword that had bakufu
officials trembling in the past
**[13:00] Kon**
is now being used to shed the
blood of his own comrades?
**[13:04] Hij**
I'm perfectly okay with those
mites killing each other.
**[13:07] Hij**
But this bothers me.
**[13:10] Hij**
It's unthinkable that a man could've
done this. What purpose does it serve?
**[13:15] Hij**
I heard a strange rumor.
**[13:17] Hij**
Apparently, before Senbe betrayed his group,
**[13:19] Hij**
he picked up a creepy black
sword from somewhere.
**[13:24] Kon**
A sword?
**[13:25] Hij**
Ever since he did, he became a different
person and obsessed over it.
**[13:29] Hij**
He started acting strangely,
like talking to the sword at times.
**[13:33] Kon**
Are you saying his objective isn't
slaying men, but the swords?
**[13:41] Kon**
Sure you're not overthinking this?
**[13:43] Hij**
I sure hope so.
**[13:45] Hij**
But I've been put through
hell by a sword, too.
**[13:49] Kon**
That reminds me. I saw Sogo talking
to his sword recently, too.
**[13:54] Kon**
He might suddenly become a serial
killer too, or something!
**[14:01] Oki**
Oh, Hijikata-san.
**[14:02] Oki**
Sorry, but I'm borrowing your
room to take this guy apart.
**[14:09] Hij**
Huh? What was that just now?
**[14:11] Kon**
What did he mean, take apart?
What was that we just saw?
**[14:13] Hij**
Wait, Sogo!
**[14:13] Hij**
No! Please no!
**[14:14] Kon**
What are you doing in my room?
**[14:21] Hij**
Finally got it out.
**[14:22] Oki**
This won't do, boss.
**[14:24] Kus**
You gotta be more gentle with elders.
**[14:26] Oki**
Man, that was one hell of a surprise.
**[14:29] Oki**
I didn't expect someone other
than me to own an excalibur.
**[14:32] Oki**
That's the boss. A real connoisseur.
**[14:35] Shin**
Gin-san, you can finally kiss
goodbye to playing scabbard.
**[14:38] Kus**
Thank ya so much for
lending me yer filthy ass.
**[14:42] Tet**
No problem. We're glad this
filthy ass was of use.
**[14:45] Kag**
Yeah. If you don't mind that
filthy ass, come hang out again.
**[14:49] Oki**
Er, I'm not sure I follow.
**[14:53] Oki**
Are we bidding farewell to the boss's ass?
**[14:55] Tet**
The thing is, the scabbard holding your sword
**[14:58] Tet**
is apparently Kusanagi-san's
long separated wife.
**[15:01] Tet**
So if possible, we'd like to send
him back to his original home.
**[15:09] Kus**
Scabberina, you've been silent all this while.
**[15:13] Kus**
You must be mad, right?
**[15:14] Kus**
I'm truly sorry!
**[15:15] Kus**
I caused ya so much pain
'cause I was so weak!
**[15:20] Kus**
But it's all right now.
**[15:22] Kus**
I swear ta protect ya.
**[15:24] Kus**
I'll never let ya go again.
**[15:25] Kus**
Could we make a fresh
start as one sword again?
**[15:33] Sca**
Who're you, anyway?
**[15:36] Sca**
Could somebody tell me what's going on?
**[15:39] Sca**
Did he just propose to me out
of the blue? That's messed up!
**[15:42] Sca**
Who's this old fart? I'm scared, So-kun!
**[15:45] Shin**
Huh?
**[15:46] Kus**
What're ya talkin' about,
Scabberina? It's me, Kusanagi!
**[15:50] Kus**
Did ya have ta wait so long
that ya forgot about me?
**[15:54] Kag**
Hey, Member Kusanagi.
Did you get the wrong Scabberina?
**[15:57] Kus**
Nah! I'd never mistake her!
**[15:59] Kus**
Right, Scabberina?
**[16:00] Oki**
Uh...
**[16:02] Oki**
Maybe you shouldn't dredge
up the past after so long.
**[16:06] Oki**
Everyone has memories they
don't want to remember.
**[16:10] Kus**
Wh-What's that supposed ta mean?
**[16:13] Oki**
It means time has passed.
**[16:16] Oki**
She's living a new chapter in her life now.
**[16:19] Oki**
With me. Right, Scarlett?
**[16:22] Sca**
Stop it, So-kun! People are watching!
**[16:25] Kus**
Who're you callin' Scarlett?!
**[16:27] Oki**
She's happy as she is now,
so what're you doing here?
**[16:32] Oki**
Take the hint, honestly.
**[16:34] Shin**
This is starting to sound like a fight
between ex- and current boyfriends.
**[16:38] Sca**
Yeah, yeah!
**[16:39] Sca**
So-kun is my savior.
**[16:42] Sca**
Put on sale in a New York slum,
I waited forever for a buyer.
**[16:47] Sca**
Nobody gave me a second
glance, but he bought me.
**[16:50] Shin**
New York? You were on sale in New York?!
**[16:53] Sca**
A worn-out scabbard,
and his big, hefty sword.
**[16:57] Sca**
I knew he was out of my league.
**[16:59] Sca**
I knew it was just a game.
That he wouldn't get serious.
**[17:02] Shin**
What is this, *Pretty Woman*?
**[17:04] Sca**
But he's always serious when playing around
**[17:07] Sca**
and always plays around when he's serious.
**[17:10] Sca**
That innocence of his gradually
thawed my frozen heart...
**[17:12] Shin**
Forget playing around, he basically
used and threw you from the start!
**[17:15] Sca**
Dunno who you are, but could
you not get in our way?
**[17:19] Sca**
We're plenty happy right now.
**[17:22] Kus**
S-Scabberina...
**[17:24] Oki**
I don't know how it was in the past,
**[17:26] Oki**
but Scarlett is now crazy for my fat
Kikuichimonji RX-78 all the way inside.
**[17:33] Sca**
Stop it, So-kun!
**[17:35] Sca**
This is too embarrassing!
**[17:36] Kus**
Scabberina! This can't be!
**[17:40] Kus**
I won't accept this!
**[17:41] Shin**
Kusanagi-san!
**[17:44] Gin**
Why'd you come back here?!
**[17:46] Shin**
Kusanagi-san...
**[17:48] Kag**
Oh, no. He's closed himself off.
**[17:51] Gin**
My butthole is what's been closed off!
**[17:53] Gin**
It's gone all the way inside!
**[17:55] Oki**
Well, there you have it.
**[17:57] Oki**
Sorry, boss, but could you get
that blunt ass outta here already?
**[18:05] Shin**
Gin-san?!
**[18:07] Shin**
And what were you guys doing? Eavesdropping?!
**[18:10] All**
Aw...
**[18:13] Oki**
What's the meaning of this, boss?
**[18:15] Gin**
You've gotta be kidding me.
**[18:17] Gin**
I'm not leaving with a lid on my ass.
**[18:19] Gin**
I'm constipated enough as it is.
**[18:21] Oki**
Shall I slice open your belly
and drag your guts out for you?
**[18:26] Kon**
Stop it, Sogo!
**[18:27] Shin**
You too, Gin-san!
**[18:28] Gin**
You guys stay out of this! This runt is mine!
**[18:32] Gin**
It's only right to settle a dispute
over swords with swords, yeah?
**[18:36] Gin**
A superior scabbard
deserves a superior sword.
**[18:40] Gin**
Isn't that right, Sogo-kun?
**[18:42] Oki**
You mean...
**[18:43] Gin**
My sword and yours...
**[18:45] Gin**
Let's have a real sword fight to see
which deserves that scabbard more.
**[18:49] Bo**
Real sword fight?!
**[18:51] Oki**
Amusing. This is a chance
I thought I'd never have.
**[18:55] Kon**
Stop it!
**[18:56] Kon**
If you two sadists clash,
**[18:59] Kon**
your sadism will repel and you-know-what...
**[19:02] Kon**
I'm a masochist!
**[19:03] Hij**
Don't take the bait, Sogo. The
Shinsengumi Code bans personal clashes.
**[19:07] Gin**
Oh, really? Personal clashes aren't allowed?
**[19:10] Gin**
That's weird. I remember having very
personal clashes with a pair of morons before.
**[19:14] Gin**
Oh, I see. Those were more
like "flashes," weren't they?
**[19:17] Gin**
Those two were defeated before
I could even do anything,
**[19:20] Gin**
so they were clashes that
were over in a flash, huh?
**[19:23] Kon**
The duel will take place tomorrow!
**[19:25] Kon**
It'll be held in the World
Clash Tournament venue!
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Ace Sakata Gintoki vs.
Shinsengumi Ace Okita Sogo
Deathmatch
**[19:28] Hij**
Have your neck washed and
ready to be chopped off!
**[19:30] Kag**
Shaddup! He's not gonna wash his neck!
**[19:31] Kag**
He'll wash every part of his body
*but* his neck with sponge gourd!
**[19:34] Shin**
Hey, what happened to the Shinsengumi Code?!
***SIGN*** Smithy
**[19:37] Shin**
What's wrong with you, Gin-san?
**[19:39] Shin**
Why'd you challenge him to that battle?
**[19:41] Gin**
It's not a battle. It's a buttle.
**[19:44] Gin**
You wouldn't understand how it feels
to have a sword stuck in your ass 24/7.
**[19:49] Shin**
I get wanting to be freed of the sword,
but you're up against Okita-san,
**[19:53] Shin**
the genius swordsman said to be the
strongest man in the Shinsengumi.
**[19:56] Shin**
And he's a super sadist to boot.
**[19:58] Shin**
He was one misstep away
from being a serial killer.
**[20:01] Shin**
He's a trashy scumbag whose
good looks are all he has.
**[20:03] Gin**
Shinpachi, what do you have against him?
**[20:06] Kag**
Shaddup! My ace ain't
gonna lose to that runt!
**[20:11] Kag**
This guy was one misstep away
from being a NEET scumbag, too!
**[20:16] Shin**
Uh, that's not missing any steps.
It's Gin-san as we know him now.
**[20:19] Gin**
What's that supposed to mean, Shinpachi?
**[20:21] Kag**
Have more faith! Everybody is one
misstep away from being a NEET!
**[20:25] Shin**
Like hell!
**[20:26] Tet**
Can I ask you something?
**[20:28] Tet**
You'll both use real swords
in the buttle tomorrow, right?
**[20:32] Tet**
How are you going to fight with that?
**[20:36] Tet**
One, two...
**[20:37] Gin**
Ow, ow, ow!
**[20:40] Gin**
Wait, time out! I can't... I can't!
**[20:42] Gin**
I'll become Shiina Kippei! I'll end
up like Shiina Kippei in *Outrage*!
**[20:45] Kag**
Pull it out or stop? Make up your
damn mind, you stupid Duncan!
**[20:50] Gin**
They all look like villains!
They all look like Takeshi!
**[20:52] Kag**
Raise the horsepower,
dammit, you stupid bean!
**[20:56] Gin**
Wait, dammit, you stupid Gidayu...
**[21:01] Kag**
All right, keep jogging toward tomorrow!
**[21:04] Kag**
Eastward ho, dammit, you stupid Comaneci!
**[21:06] Gin**
You're getting your priorities mixed up!
**[21:08] Gin**
Enough! How long are you
gonna stay holed up in there?
**[21:12] Gin**
Just get out already!
**[21:13] Kus**
No! There's no way a blunt
sword like me could ever win!
**[21:17] Kus**
I'm so blunt, I can't even rend my
long-severed marriage or my regrets...
**[21:21] Kus**
I'm just a corn potage Tasty Stick!
**[21:23] Gin**
Don't casually try to be the yummy
one, you stupid natto flavor!
**[21:26] Tet**
Have more faith in yourself, Kusanagi.
**[21:28] Tet**
The most important thing in a
sword isn't its cutting edge!
**[21:31] Tet**
It's the core that runs through its blade!
**[21:34] Tet**
People and swords are the same.
**[21:35] Tet**
Even if they run into brick walls,
as long as their cores stay intact,
**[21:38] Tet**
they can be beaten back
into shape over and over!
**[21:40] Tet**
Your love for your scabbard
is the mark of a great sword.
**[21:44] Tet**
Leave the rest to a smithy.
**[21:46] Kus**
Tetsuko-han... Will you
beat me back inta shape?
**[21:55] Tet**
Don't worry. I promise to turn
you into the most splendid sword.
**[22:00] Tet**
I won't let anybody call
you a dull ass anymore.
**[22:03] Kus**
I'm countin' on ya, Tetsuko-han!
**[22:05] Tet**
Sure! Here I go!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** The Super Sadist and the Super Sadist
**[23:50] Oki**
Next time: "The Super Sadist..."
**[23:51] Gin**
"...and the Super Sadist."
***SIGN*** Huh? Another multi-episode arc?
***SIGN*** Yep. Another multi-episode arc.
***SIGN*** But after doing arcs that lasted entire cours,
***SIGN*** we can stick by our guns and still call this a collection of short stories.
# 335 - The Super Sadist and the Super Sadist
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:15] Oki**
Show yourself.
**[00:17] Oki**
There's no point in hiding.
**[00:21] Oki**
Mine's howling, too.
**[00:42] Oki**
Senbe the Manslayer.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** The Super Sadist and the Super Sadist
***SIGN*** Smithy
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[02:29] Tet**
There. All done.
**[02:31] Kag**
You finished reforging?
**[02:33] Shin**
The reborn Kusanagi-san is finally complete?
**[02:37] Tet**
Yeah. I'm glad I somehow finished
in time for the battle tomorrow.
**[02:42] Tet**
As a smith, I've done everything I can.
**[02:45] Tet**
Now, depending on his wielder, he can
become an incredible sword or a blunt one.
**[02:50] Tet**
Gin-san,
**[02:51] Tet**
the rest is up to you.
**[02:59] Kus**
Uh, ya haven't finished at all!
**[03:01] Kus**
Talk about hasty patchwork!
**[03:03] Kus**
What was all that clangin' I heard
earlier? This ain't the work of a smith!
**[03:07] Kus**
It's a DIY disaster!
**[03:09] Gin**
Great job, Tetsuko.
**[03:11] Gin**
He was so blunt before, but now
his retorts are razor sharp.
**[03:14] Kus**
Yer impressed with *that*?
Why make me so tiny?!
**[03:18] Kus**
I can't even fit in Scabberina
like this, let alone win the duel!
**[03:22] Kus**
It'd be so loose! She'd think I'm impotent!
**[03:24] Gin**
Quit nitpicking.
**[03:26] Gin**
Even if you hadn't broken here,
you were already broken inside.
**[03:30] Gin**
Besides, your wife was always a loose
s*ut anyway. You're a perfect fit.
**[03:34] Kus**
Who're ya callin' a s*ut?!
**[03:36] Tet**
S-Sorry. I did what I could, but...
**[03:40] Gin**
Don't worry, Tetsuko.
**[03:43] Gin**
You already granted my wish
to get this guy outta my ass.
**[03:46] Gin**
An impotent sword like this would lose
even before getting to the love hotel,
**[03:50] Gin**
so we've gotta boycott the duel...
**[03:52] Kus**
Not on my watch.
**[03:55] Gin**
D-Damn you...
**[03:56] Gin**
You can remotely control your broken bits?!
**[04:01] Kus**
Ya just wanted ta get me outta ya, eh?
**[04:04] Kus**
That ain't gonna fly.
**[04:06] Kus**
Take responsibility for turnin' me
inta this and win that duel tomorrow!
**[04:09] Gin**
Screw you!
**[04:11] Gin**
How am I supposed to fight with
an impotent sword like you?
**[04:14] Kus**
Shaddup!
**[04:15] Kus**
Length doesn't make a man! Speed does!
**[04:17] Gin**
You finish quick, too? Damn,
there's nothing good about you!
**[04:20] Kag**
Don't worry, Gin-chan. It's not length
or speed that makes a man.
**[04:24] Kag**
It's how many rounds he can fight!
**[04:26] Kag**
To boost your regenerative ability,
**[04:28] Kag**
stick your sword in burned sand and iced
water alternatively in this special drill!
**[04:32] Shin**
What sword are you drilling?!
**[04:35] Shin**
What now, Tetsuko-san?
**[04:37] Tet**
It'll be hard for him to
be a longsword again.
**[04:39] Tet**
Even if I want to reforge him as a short one,
I don't know if his body can take it.
**[04:45] Tet**
Part of the reason he broke was that
his blade had grown weak with age.
**[04:50] Tet**
But it seems an old wound played a part, too.
**[04:54] Shin**
An old wound?
**[04:55] Tet**
Kusanagi...
**[04:57] Tet**
That's why you've become so blunt, right?
**[05:02] Kus**
I really can't hide anythin'
from ya, eh, Tetsuko-han?
**[05:06] Kus**
The truth is...
**[05:09] Kus**
I already fought ta take Scabberina
back once a long time ago.
**[05:16] Gin**
What's with that woman?
**[05:18] Gin**
She'd gotten it on with some other sword
in the past, too? Shameless hussy, much?
**[05:22] Kus**
Take that back!
**[05:23] Kus**
That ain't it. That ain't it at all.
**[05:26] Kus**
Scabberina wasn't originally
my scabbard. She was his.
**[05:31] Kus**
In other words, she and I are... uh...
**[05:34] Shin**
You were the one who stole her originally?!
**[05:37] Kus**
Anyone'd assume that.
Maybe this is all karma.
**[05:43] Kus**
But back then, I just
couldn't leave her alone.
**[05:49] ---**
Her husband was a masterpiece
known ta all on Planet Excalibur:
**[05:54] ---**
the cursed sword, Maganagi.
**[05:56] ---**
A mad sword whose name made others run
with their blades between their legs.
**[06:00] ---**
He wasn't feared 'cause of his sharpness
alone, but also for his savagery.
**[06:09] ---**
We excaliburlings do our work by being
used as bloodsucking biological weapons.
**[06:15] ---**
But Maganagi is worse.
**[06:19] ---**
His staple food is swords, meaning...
**[06:23] ---**
He's a cannibal.
**[06:26] ---**
He maintained his absurd sharpness
by suckin' the energy of his own.
**[06:32] ---**
All the scabbards chosen ta
house him met with tragic ends.
**[06:37] ---**
Each and every day, they had their
energy sucked out and were left ta rot.
**[06:42] ---**
And once they ran out, they were dumped.
**[06:45] ---**
Ta him, Scabberina may have just been
his latest of hundreds of scabbards,
**[06:50] ---**
but ta me, she was an irreplaceable,
dear childhood friend.
**[06:55] ---**
I just couldn't sit there and watch her cry,
**[07:01] ---**
even if it meant goin' up against
the cursed sword Maganagi.
**[07:06] Tet**
Oh, is that when you got that wound?
**[07:09] Kus**
I couldn't beat him, of course,
**[07:11] Kus**
but I barely managed ta survive
and take Scabberina back.
**[07:15] Kus**
We came ta Earth ta get away from him, too.
**[07:20] Kus**
I never thought things would end up this way.
**[07:23] Kus**
What's worse, even Maganagi's...
**[07:25] Gin**
Maganagi's what? What're you talking about?
**[07:28] Kus**
Ya guys saw him, too...
**[07:30] Kus**
That ominous form of his.
**[07:35] Oki**
Never expected you to
have one of those, too.
**[07:38] Sen**
You took the words right out of my mouth.
**[07:41] Sen**
I'm in luck today.
**[07:43] Sen**
After I spent years and years
looking for those two,
**[07:46] Sen**
I found them both in one day.
**[07:51] Sen**
I was planning to devour him first,
**[07:56] Sen**
but whatever.
**[07:59] Sen**
If I grab what you've got there,
he'll come to me himself.
**[08:05] Oki**
Not sure what you're talking about,
but it seems my Scarlett is pretty popular.
**[08:11] Oki**
And I was having trouble sleeping because
my blood's been itching for action.
**[08:15] Oki**
You won't exactly make for a
great warm-up before the boss,
**[08:22] Oki**
but I hope you'll at least be
a light appetizer, Senbe-san.
**[08:28] Sen**
Senbe? Who the heck is that?
**[08:34] Gin**
Wait, was it the sword that guy
was carrying this afternoon?
**[08:37] Kus**
No doubt about it.
**[08:39] Kus**
I'm sure he noticed me, too.
**[08:42] Kus**
It's only a matter of time before
he also locates Scabberina.
**[08:45] Kus**
This is no time ta be
worryin' about old wounds.
**[08:48] Gin**
He may be a terrifying sword or whatever,
**[08:52] Gin**
but whether he's harmful
is up to his wielder, no?
**[08:54] Kus**
Normally, yeah.
**[08:56] Kus**
But not with him.
**[08:58] Kus**
Unlike me, he doesn't stick himself inta
filthy asses and get cozy with his wielder.
**[09:03] Mag**
Don't misunderstand.
**[09:06] Mag**
I'm not Senbe or whatever.
**[09:11] Mag**
My name is...
**[09:18] Mag**
Maganagi.
**[09:21] Mag**
Cursed Sword Maganagi!
**[09:24] Kus**
His wielder's body is
nothin' but a tool to him.
**[09:28] Kus**
He wields himself.
**[09:30] Kus**
Maganagi's blade doesn't
pierce any filthy asses.
**[09:36] Kus**
It pierces people's very souls
and makes them his own!
**[09:43] Mag**
Huh?
**[09:49] Oki**
Sorry, Senbe-san.
**[09:50] Oki**
I forgot *Rakugo Masters* was
airing today. I'll just go home.
**[09:55] Mag**
*What?!*
**[09:55] Oki**
Jeez, why do all rakugo programs
air late nights or early mornings?
**[09:56] Mag**
* Wait a second. We dragged this out*
* from last week, so what's this?*
**[09:59] Mag**
*I acted all cool, and this is how it ends?*
**[10:02] Mag**
*And what's with that guy?*
**[10:05] Mag**
* He took me, Maganagi,*
* out with just one swing!*
**[10:08] Mag**
W-Wait, Okita Sogo.
**[10:12] Mag**
Hey, forget about rakugo for now!
**[10:14] Mag**
If you want *Rakugo Masters*,
I've got it on DVD!
**[10:17] Mag**
Listen to me for a second!
**[10:18] Mag**
Hey, wait!
***SIGN*** World Clash Tournament Venue
**[10:31] Kon**
Odd Jobs sure is late.
***SIGN*** World Clash Tournament Venue
**[10:34] Kon**
Please don't tell me he got cold feet.
**[10:37] Ymz**
You know that's never
happening with the boss.
**[10:40] Ymz**
Probably hasn't gotten that
sword out of his ass yet.
**[10:42] Kon**
Oh, I don't see Sogo or Toshi, either.
**[10:45] Kon**
What's going on here? Are we
the only ones up for this?
**[10:48] Ymz**
Captain Okita has been gone since yesterday.
**[10:51] Ymz**
Vice Chief heard this morning that Senbe
the Manslayer was passed out on the street,
**[10:55] Ymz**
so he went to check that out.
**[10:56] Kon**
Senbe was what?
**[10:58] Ymz**
Arresting him was well and good,
but he's been acting strange.
**[11:01] G**
Oh, he's here!
**[11:03] Kon**
There you are. Looks like
your bum sword is usable now.
**[11:10] Gin**
My bum sword?
**[11:11] Gin**
Oh, you mean this Alienslayer?
**[11:14] Kon**
Lies!
**[11:16] Gin**
Huh? What do you mean?
**[11:17] Kon**
Don't give me that! There's no way that
massive thing was stuck in your ass!
**[11:21] Gin**
Quit harping. The part that was
inside was actually this big.
**[11:25] Kon**
You're the one harping! This duel will
decide which sword deserves the scabbard!
**[11:29] Kon**
You made the rules!
***SIGN*** It was far too large to be called
a sword stuck in my ass.
**[11:32] Gin**
* It was far too large to be called*
* a sword stuck in my ass.*
**[11:37] Gin**
*It was a far too large, thick, heavy,*
***SIGN*** It was a far too large, thick, heavy,
and much too crude a lie.
**[11:40] Gin**
*and much too crude a lie.*
**[11:42] Kon**
Don't use *Berserk*'s narration
to announce your regrets!
**[11:45] Gin**
You're such a nag.
**[11:46] Gin**
I have the one that was stuck in
my ass right here as a short sword.
**[11:50] Gin**
Samurai always carried two swords, anyway.
**[11:54] Gin**
Let me at least act like a samurai
during a real-sword fight.
**[11:57] Kon**
Spouting BS like that is
completely unlike a samurai!
**[11:59] Tet**
Gin-san...
**[12:00] Tet**
That's really not going to work.
**[12:03] Kag**
This is much better.
**[12:05] Kon**
That's not the issue here!
**[12:06] Kon**
All you did was switch from Berserk to FF!
**[12:09] Gin**
Not interested.
**[12:11] Gin**
* It was far too advanced*
* to be called FF anymore.*
***SIGN*** It was far too advanced
to be called FF anymore.
**[12:15] Gin**
*I liked the fantasies like 3 and 4 better.*
***SIGN*** I liked the fantasies like 3 and 4 better.
**[12:19] Kon**
What're you even on about?!
**[12:20] Oki**
Now, now. Let him do as he pleases.
**[12:24] ---**
Sogo!
**[12:25] Oki**
If we're gonna fight to the death,
**[12:27] Oki**
going all-out with our weapons
of choice would be more fun.
**[12:32] Oki**
Right, boss?
**[12:35] Gin**
Lucky! We made it through somehow.
**[12:37] Kus**
This could work! This might just work!
**[12:40] Oki**
Besides...
**[12:42] Oki**
I found myself a new weapon too, actually.
**[12:48] Oki**
Right, Senbe-san?
**[12:49] Mag**
L-Look, I'm not Senbe.
**[12:51] Mag**
I'm telling you I'm Cursed
Sword Maganagi, sir.
**[13:01] [SONG] Sign**
Edo Hospital
**[13:02] Hij**
Senbe.
**[13:04] Hij**
Hey, Senbe.
**[13:07] G**
He's been like this ever since
he regained consciousness.
**[13:10] G**
Could it be his wound?
**[13:12] Hij**
It didn't reach his brain.
**[13:15] Hij**
Somebody spotted a Shinsengumi
member fighting him last night.
**[13:21] Hij**
One thrust was apparently all it took.
**[13:23] Hij**
He defeated Senbe the
Manslayer with one strike.
**[13:25] Hij**
And he barely kept him alive
by the skin of his teeth.
**[13:30] Hij**
It could only have been one guy.
**[13:35] G**
Captain Okita?
**[13:36] G**
So that total sadist terrorized
him into this state.
**[13:40] Hij**
Nah. The way I see it, this guy
wasn't broken anytime recently.
**[13:45] G**
Are you saying he went around
slaying people in this state?
**[13:50] Hij**
Probably not.
**[13:53] Hij**
That means this guy wasn't
Senbe the Manslayer.
**[13:57] G**
But Vice Chief, he's definitely...
**[13:59] Hij**
Oh, he's Senbe, all right.
**[14:02] Hij**
But he probably wasn't
the one slaying people.
**[14:06] Hij**
Where's his weapon?
**[14:08] Hij**
The sword he was carrying.
**[14:10] G**
Oh, we actually haven't found it yet.
**[14:15] G**
Senbe? What's wrong?!
**[14:17] Sen**
N-No! I don't want to be consumed anymore!
**[14:22] G**
Calm down, Senbe!
**[14:24] Sen**
It's that guy's turn to be consumed now.
**[14:28] Sen**
He'll become the manslayer now!
**[14:32] G**
Vice Chief?!
**[14:34] Hij**
*My bad feeling was on the mark.*
**[14:36] Hij**
*Anybody else would laugh it off,*
**[14:39] Hij**
*but I know how terrifying swords can be.*
**[14:42] Hij**
* Because I experienced the*
* curse of the Muramasha.*
**[14:46] Hij**
*That man wasn't Senbe the Manslayer.*
**[14:48] Hij**
*It was his sword!*
**[14:52] Hij**
*This is bad news.*
**[14:53] Hij**
* That thing is likely in the hands of*
* someone far more terrifying than Senbe!*
**[14:59] Hij**
*If he got his hands on that cursed sword,*
**[15:02] Hij**
* then forget manslayer, he'd become*
* a world-conquering overlord!*
**[15:07] Shin**
I-Is that...
**[15:09] Shin**
Could that sword be...
**[15:11] Shin**
Maganagi!
**[15:14] Shin**
It's Cursed Sword Maganagi!
**[15:18] Kus**
Why? Why does that bro have Maganagi?!
**[15:22] Oki**
I happened to acquire it last night.
**[15:25] Oki**
It insisted on becoming my sword of choice.
**[15:28] Oki**
Having only my scabbard be from Excalibur
didn't sit right with me, anyway.
**[15:33] Oki**
Three excaliburlings on Earth.
In Edo alone, no less.
**[15:37] Oki**
This must be fate at work.
**[15:40] Mag**
Indeed.
**[15:42] Mag**
Who would've thought I'd find the
two I was looking for right here?
**[15:46] Mag**
Don't you agree, Kusanagi?
**[15:49] Mag**
I hear this is a duel over a scabbard?
**[15:55] Mag**
This is fate, Kusanagi.
**[15:58] Mag**
The moment you tricked me,
your fates were sealed!
**[16:03] Mag**
Die and return to the earth.
**[16:10] Oki**
Hey, lady, your dog pooped.
**[16:13] Oki**
Don't you know an owner is supposed
to clean up after their pet?
**[16:16] W**
Oh, I'm so sorry!
**[16:19] Mag**
What are you doing?!
**[16:20] Mag**
Do you really think you can stab
crap like this with a cursed sword?!
**[16:24] Oki**
Quit complaining.
**[16:27] Oki**
I don't mind making this
your scabbard, you know.
**[16:31] Oki**
You can be an excaliturd.
**[16:33] Oki**
This duel isn't between you swords.
**[16:35] Oki**
It's between the boss and me
to decide who is stronger.
**[16:39] Mag**
Y-You don't have to be so cruel.
**[16:41] Mag**
Didn't we promise to do
our best together, Master?
**[16:44] Mag**
A sword like me and a wielder like
you would be invincible together.
**[16:48] Mag**
We could conquer the world...
**[16:51] Oki**
Boss, what say we clean this
place up before we duel?
**[16:55] Mag**
There's dog poop everywhere.
**[16:55] Mag**
I'm sorry, Master! I'll keep my
mouth shut, so please spare me!
**[16:59] Kus**
I-I don't believe it.
**[17:01] Kus**
That cursed sword is
totally under his control.
**[17:04] Kus**
Just how scary a guy is that bro?
**[17:07] Gin**
Looks like the one sword
we really wanted to avoid
**[17:11] Gin**
showed up in the hands of the
one guy who shouldn't wield it.
**[17:15] Kus**
This is awful!
***SIGN*** World Clash Tournament Venue
**[17:17] Kus**
I was hopin' I could figure something
out before fightin' him...
**[17:20] Kus**
If we lose this duel, both
Scabberina and I are done for!
**[17:24] Gin**
This is fine, really.
**[17:27] Gin**
In real-sword fights, the one
who clings to hope loses.
**[17:30] Gin**
Hope isn't something you'll
find lying ahead in your path.
**[17:35] Gin**
You'll find it hanging from the ass
of the guys who live in the moment.
**[17:42] Gin**
It's basically a goldfish turd.
**[17:46] Gin**
Right now, having a blade stuck
in my ass would be perfect.
**[17:51] Oki**
What, that thing was all for show?
That's just your usual wooden sword.
**[17:55] Oki**
Well, whatever. If that's how you wanna play,
**[17:58] Oki**
I'll stop thinking about a future
where I sheathe my sword.
**[18:04] Oki**
Until that goldfish turd of yours
hangs from the tip of my sword,
**[18:09] Oki**
it will remain drawn!
**[18:11] Kon**
But it already is! You'll cause
a mess if you sheathe it!
**[18:15] Gin**
Bring it on. Let's see
whose turd will hang first.
**[18:20] Kus**
Why're you swingin' turds around, too?!
**[18:28] Bo**
Let's fight fair and square!
**[18:37] Shin**
What the hell are you two doing?!
**[18:40] Shin**
They started picking up poop!
**[18:44] Kus**
W-Wait...
**[18:45] Shin**
What's going on here?
What are they competing over?
**[18:46] Shin**
Is this how this duel was supposed to go?
**[18:48] Mag**
Wait, stop! I can't breathe!
**[18:52] Shin**
Your swords are the only ones suffering!
**[18:54] Shin**
What's wrong with you sadists?!
**[18:57] Bo**
Eat this!
**[18:59] Shin**
Eat this, my ass! What are you, cavemen?!
**[19:07] Shin**
They're using amazing moves!
**[19:08] Shin**
They're both going insane!
**[19:11] Shin**
But why poop?!
**[19:20] Oki**
*In the poop's shadow?*
**[19:22] Oki**
*But this is also...*
**[19:25] Oki**
*a feint!*
**[19:28] Gin**
Not there.
**[19:30] Gin**
Over here.
**[19:34] Oki**
Not there.
**[19:36] Oki**
Over here.
**[19:38] Gin**
Not here. There.
**[19:40] Oki**
Not there. There.
**[19:42] Gin**
Not there. Manure.
**[19:44] Shin**
Why are you having a high-level
back and forth with poop?!
**[19:47] Shin**
And just how much poop is
on this riverbank, anyway?
**[19:50] Kag**
Gin-chan!
**[19:52] Kag**
Just wait! I'll provide
covering fire for you!
**[19:54] Shin**
That's not covering! That's just dumping!
**[19:57] Oki**
You really are fun, boss.
**[19:59] Oki**
Your technique's all over the place.
**[20:01] Oki**
There's no way to tell
where you'll attack from.
**[20:04] Shin**
Hey! The camera's focusing
on the wrong thing!
**[20:07] Gin**
You won't look so relaxed for too long.
**[20:10] Gin**
I can't wait to see what your face
will look like in the next cut.
**[20:13] Shin**
It looks like something ridiculous already!
**[20:15] Shin**
Totally looks like two turds
having a conversation!
**[20:17] Kon**
Th-This is an outrageous duel.
**[20:20] Kon**
I never expected it to get so heated.
**[20:22] Shin**
You're more outrageous right now!
**[20:26] Kag**
You've got poop on your head, Gorilla!
**[20:28] Kag**
Barrier! Barrier!
**[20:30] Kon**
I had my barrier up, too!
**[20:32] Shin**
You're all covered in shit!
**[20:35] Shin**
Knock it off already.
**[20:36] Shin**
The screen's been filled
with nothing but poop!
**[20:40] Shin**
Wait, who put my glasses on poop?!
**[20:49] Kus**
*Insane.*
**[20:52] Kus**
*Gintoki-han is insane.*
**[20:56] Kus**
* He's fightin' that cursed sword*
* Maganagi on equal footin'.*
**[21:00] Mag**
*I was right.*
**[21:04] Mag**
* This guy is on a whole*
* different level than Senbe.*
**[21:08] Mag**
*At last...*
**[21:10] Mag**
*At last, I found it.*
**[21:12] Mag**
*A vessel befitting me, Maganagi.*
**[21:16] Mag**
*Kusanagi.*
**[21:18] Mag**
* The man you found is a*
* special talent himself.*
**[21:21] Mag**
*However!*
**[21:30] Mag**
*Even if the vessels are equal,*
**[21:37] Mag**
*their swords are like night and day!*
**[21:46] Kon**
H—
**[21:47] Kon**
His sword vanished?!
**[21:51] Oki**
Nothing vanished.
**[21:54] Oki**
They're right here in my belly.
**[22:00] Oki**
Both your sword
**[22:03] Oki**
and this man.
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:40] Kus**
This is awful! Maganagi took over that bro!
**[23:43] Kus**
I-It's all over!
**[23:45] Gin**
Don't give up, Kusanagi!
**[23:46] Kus**
But Kudo—I mean, Gintoki-han!
**[23:49] Gin**
You still have my blood
and my scabbard, foo'.
***SIGN*** The Strongest Sword, and the Dullest Ass
***SIGN*** We're really sorry if you were watching while having dinner.
***SIGN*** The Gintoki vs. Okita & Swords story ends next week!
***SIGN*** The next C*nan Hint is...
***SIGN*** "Subtly Off-Color."
# 336 - The Strongest Sword, and the Dullest Sword
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] Kus**
We excaliburlings do our work by being
used as bloodsucking biological weapons.
**[00:11] Kus**
But Maganagi is worse.
**[00:14] Kus**
His staple food is swords, meaning...
**[00:17] Kus**
He's a cannibal.
**[00:19] Hij**
*My bad feeling was on the mark.*
**[00:21] Hij**
*That man wasn't Senbe the Manslayer.*
**[00:23] Hij**
*It was his sword!*
**[00:26] Gin**
Looks like the one sword
we really wanted to avoid
**[00:29] Gin**
showed up in the hands of the
one guy who shouldn't wield it.
**[00:35] Mag**
Nothing vanished.
**[00:37] Mag**
They're right here in my belly.
**[00:42] Mag**
Both your sword
**[00:44] Mag**
and this man.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** The Strongest Sword, and the Dullest Sword
**[02:29] Shin**
I-Is that...
**[02:31] Kon**
S-Sogo?
**[02:35] Hij**
That's not him anymore.
**[02:37] Kon**
T-Toshi!
**[02:39] Hij**
Damn, we were too late.
**[02:41] Gin**
Hey, Kusanagi, could it be?
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[02:47] Mag**
I'm amazed you had the gall to treat me,
Cursed Sword Maganagi, as you did.
**[02:53] Mag**
Nobody has ever mocked me so much.
No vessel has been such a pain to take over.
**[02:59] Mag**
You were the first, Master.
**[03:02] Mag**
But your superhuman body and mind,
rare anywhere in the universe,
**[03:08] Mag**
already belong to me, Maganagi.
**[03:12] Mag**
The strongest sword and the
strongest vessel are now one.
**[03:15] Mag**
At last, I have attained strength
unparalleled across the universe.
**[03:20] Kus**
He got consumed! That bro
got consumed by Maganagi!
**[03:25] Hij**
Capture him!
**[03:28] Mag**
Wow, what do you think you're
doing to one of your comrades?
**[03:32] Kon**
H-Hey, Toshi!
**[03:34] Hij**
Just trust me for now.
That's not Sogo anymore.
**[03:38] Hij**
Your stupid game is over.
**[03:40] Hij**
We know what you really are.
Throw that sword away.
**[03:45] Mag**
What are you saying? I'm in the
middle of a real-sword fight here.
**[03:50] Mag**
If I threw my sword away,
I'd get sliced in half.
**[03:54] Hij**
And if you won't do it,
I'll just cut you down myself.
**[03:58] Mag**
Can you do it?
**[04:00] Mag**
Can you guys cut me down?
**[04:02] Mag**
Because I can cut anything.
**[04:08] Kon**
O-Our swords!
**[04:11] Mag**
I'm sick of eating dull swords.
**[04:15] Kon**
Sogo!
**[04:18] Gin**
Hey, you're going after the wrong guy.
**[04:21] Gin**
I'm your opponent.
**[04:26] Hij**
Hey! You're the one who
went after the wrong guy!
**[04:29] Hij**
Why'd you throw poop at *my* face?
**[04:32] Gin**
I didn't. It got sucked in to your face like
it was going home to where it belonged.
**[04:36] Hij**
Whose face are you calling a toilet?!
**[04:38] Hij**
I'm gonna kill him for sure.
**[04:40] Hij**
Wait, Toshi.
**[04:41] Tet**
Gin-san...
**[04:42] Gin**
Stay away.
**[04:43] Gin**
This is a real-sword fight.
Keep your noses out of it.
**[04:47] Tet**
Gin-san, this is no time for that.
**[04:49] Shin**
She's right. Even if you want
to fight, your sword's gone.
**[04:52] Gin**
But I have a sword right here.
**[04:54] Gin**
The best sword and wielder in the universe?
**[04:57] Gin**
What's so scary about that?
All they can do is cut.
**[05:02] Gin**
We're the dullest sword and the man with
the most constipated ass in the universe.
**[05:08] Gin**
Not even you can cut us down.
**[05:10] Shin**
All we've got is negatives!
**[05:12] Kus**
G-Gintoki-han!
**[05:14] Gin**
Maganagi...
**[05:15] Gin**
No matter how much you corner them,
**[05:18] Gin**
you can't sever the bond between Kusanagi
and Scabberina, between husband and wife.
**[05:23] Sca**
So-kun!
**[05:25] Sca**
What's wrong, So-kun?!
**[05:27] Shin**
It's already severed, though!
She's not worried about us at all!
**[05:31] Gin**
Even if you lose your memories, the
vow between husband and wife...
**[05:36] Gin**
The depraved memories of the *****
they exchanged thousands of times
**[05:39] Gin**
will never vanish from their bodies!
**[05:41] Shin**
In the end, they're only
linked by dirty things!
**[05:44] Mag**
Fool. If you fight at such close range,
**[05:48] Mag**
you'll be forced to step deep
into your enemy's reach.
**[05:51] Mag**
And once I'm awakened, any sword within
my reach is rendered dull and useless!
**[05:56] Kus**
No! Don't touch him!
**[05:58] Kus**
If you touch him right now,
I'll be cannibalized!
**[06:01] Kus**
Gintoki-han!
**[06:05] Gin**
Don't touch the sword? Are you stupid?
**[06:08] Gin**
That's obvious in a real-sword fight.
**[06:11] Kon**
No way. He's seeing through
all of Sogo's moves.
**[06:15] Gin**
You probably don't get it since
you change bodies all the time.
**[06:19] Gin**
But for us, it's all over if
we get cut by a sword once.
**[06:21] Gin**
We won't get anything done
if we hesitate, though.
**[06:24] Gin**
When it comes to real-sword fights,
**[06:26] Gin**
only those crazy enough to walk into mortal
danger bare-handed are cut out for it.
**[06:32] Gin**
Right, Okita-kun?
**[06:33] Gin**
Actually, you're not him.
**[06:35] Gin**
His moves aren't this easy to read.
**[06:39] Gin**
What did you even take over his body for?
**[06:43] Mag**
You little!
**[06:46] Gin**
I don't know or care how many
blades you've eaten in your life.
**[06:50] Gin**
But I know that I've beaten
many more than that!
**[07:00] Kus**
C-Crap... Gintoki-han, I can't go on.
**[07:04] Kus**
Th-The Viagra's effects r-ran out.
**[07:08] Gin**
Huh? Wait a second!
**[07:11] Gin**
You can't pull that now! And I don't
remember giving you any Viagra!
**[07:15] Kus**
Shaddup! I told ya my speed's all I got!
**[07:20] Kus**
This is all yer fault for
draggin' out the foreplay!
**[07:23] Gin**
My foreplay doesn't take too long,
you broken bastard!
**[07:25] Gin**
Get it up already! This is way
worse than just being dull!
**[07:28] Gin**
You're basically a soggy Curl snack now!
**[07:30] Kag**
Don't worry, Gin-chan! The cheese
flavor is good even when soggy!
**[07:34] Gin**
You keep your mouth shut!
**[07:37] Mag**
You let the chance of a lifetime slip.
**[07:40] Mag**
Thanks for your helpful advice!
**[07:47] Gin**
*His moves are getting sharper!*
**[07:49] Mag**
Did you think I can only
control the body, the vessel?
**[07:54] Mag**
My belly is filled with the experience
and tactics of everyone I've eaten.
**[08:00] Mag**
By the time I get used to this body,
**[08:03] Mag**
I'll bring out more power
than it originally had.
**[08:06] Mag**
You know why?
**[08:07] Mag**
Because I've eaten and beaten more
blades than you could ever hope to!
**[08:15] Gin**
Guess he's not called a
cursed sword for nothing.
**[08:18] Shin**
Th-This is bad.
**[08:19] Shin**
He has to avoid contact with the blade.
And Kusanagi-san's all limp, to boot!
**[08:22] Gin**
*I've gotta do something, or I'll lose here.*
**[08:26] Shin**
Gin-san!
**[08:30] Sca**
That's enough! Stop it, you two!
**[08:33] Kus**
S-Scabberina.
**[08:35] Mag**
Oh?
**[08:36] Sca**
Stop fighting over me.
**[08:40] Sca**
I can't bear to watch So-kun
getting hurt anymore!
**[08:44] Kus**
Wh-What're ya sayin', Scabberina?
**[08:47] Kus**
Th-That ain't your sword or So-kun.
**[08:51] Kus**
That's Cursed Sword Maganagi,
the one who put us through hell!
**[08:55] Sca**
Shut it, geezer! I don't give
a flying rat's ass about you!
**[08:59] Sca**
All I care about is So-kun's safety.
**[09:02] Kus**
S-Scabberina...
**[09:04] Kus**
Did ya forget about not
just me, but Maganagi, too?
**[09:09] Sca**
I beg you, So-kun. Please stop...
**[09:16] Kus**
Scabberina!
**[09:17] Kus**
Maganagi, you bastard!
**[09:20] Mag**
Kusanagi, it seems your blade isn't
the only thing that's gone dull.
**[09:26] Mag**
That girl hasn't forgotten a thing.
**[09:30] Mag**
She hasn't forgotten
anything about you or me.
**[09:34] Mag**
She just never knew.
**[09:36] Kus**
She never knew? What do ya mean?
**[09:39] Mag**
Haven't you figured it out yet?
**[09:41] Mag**
That scabbard isn't yours or mine.
**[09:46] Mag**
It's your daughter, Scarlett.
**[09:50] Kus**
Say what?
**[09:52] Tet**
What does he mean, daughter?
How do they give birth?
**[09:54] Mag**
I don't blame you for mistaking her.
**[09:56] Mag**
Scarlett does look exactly
like a younger version of her.
**[10:01] Mag**
Scabberina was already pregnant with
your daughter when you were separated.
**[10:08] Mag**
And she raised her all by herself,
**[10:10] Mag**
believing that you three would
live as a family again one day.
**[10:16] Mag**
But she was a single mother.
**[10:18] Mag**
It wasn't easy for a scabbard
without a sword to protect her child.
**[10:22] Mag**
So she chose to survive by housing
all kinds of other swords,
**[10:28] Mag**
even if it meant betraying her husband.
**[10:33] Mag**
But by then, she was already
drained and exhausted.
**[10:38] Kus**
Wh-Why? Why do ya know all this?!
**[10:42] Mag**
Isn't that obvious? It's because I
saved her from the hell she was in.
**[10:47] Mag**
In the place of a dullard
who never came to help her,
**[10:51] Mag**
I freed Scabberina from her suffering.
**[10:55] Kus**
D-Don't tell me, ya...
**[10:58] Mag**
The reason I'm here right now
is to keep my promise to her.
**[11:05] (Flashback) Sca**
I don't care what happens to me.
**[11:07] (Flashback) Sca**
But please help those two meet.
**[11:10] (Flashback) Sca**
Even just one look will do. Let him
see his daughter alive and well.
**[11:18] (Flashback) Sen**
One look? Do I seem that heartless to you?
**[11:25] Mag**
I'll bring your entire family together.
**[11:28] Mag**
All three of you can meet in my belly.
**[11:32] Kus**
Maganagi, you...
**[11:37] Gin**
K-Kusanagi!
**[11:39] Gin**
*Don't tell me, back then?*
**[11:41] Gin**
Didn't I tell you? From the moment you
tricked me, your fates were sealed.
**[11:47] Kus**
W-Wait, Maganagi!
**[11:49] Mag**
Fret not. I'll send your
daughter after you at once.
**[11:54] Mag**
Resent your own dull blade if you must.
**[11:57] Mag**
Curse your foolishness for
daring to defy me, Maganagi.
**[12:02] Kus**
Don't!
**[12:03] Kus**
Stop it, Maganagi!
**[12:17] Kus**
Stop it, Maganagi!
**[12:20] Kus**
Leave her alone!
**[12:22] Kus**
Leave our... Leave our daughter alone!
**[12:29] Shin**
Kusanagi-san!
**[12:35] Mag**
This is the end...
**[12:39] Mag**
I can't move?
**[12:41] Oki**
Hold up. You're jumping the gun.
**[12:47] Oki**
It's too early to go back into the scabbard.
**[12:50] Mag**
Y-You...
**[12:52] Kon**
S-Sogo?
**[12:54] Mag**
*How are you still here? I consumed your mind!*
**[13:00] Mag**
*Th-The scabbard's... This can't be.*
**[13:05] Mag**
*I, Maganagi, cannot control this man?*
**[13:10] Oki**
The duel isn't over yet.
**[13:14] Oki**
They're not done yet.
**[13:23] Mag**
What are you...
**[13:25] Mag**
What do you plan to do with
just that rotting, dull blade?
**[13:29] Mag**
Kusanagi is already dead.
Everything is all over.
**[13:34] Mag**
The scabbard he was looking
for is long gone, too.
**[13:38] Mag**
You people lost to me, Maganagi.
**[13:42] Gin**
Oh, but there's a scabbard right here.
**[13:45] Gin**
Can't you see it?
**[13:47] Gin**
Can't you see the scabbard that continued
to protect her sword even when separated?
**[13:52] Gin**
Can't you see this great scabbard that
protected her husband and daughter to the end?
**[13:58] Gin**
No matter how many times
his blade crumbles away,
**[14:00] Gin**
his soul doesn't have a single scratch on it.
**[14:04] Gin**
With a true masterpiece,
even if its blade chips away,
**[14:09] Gin**
it can be reforged over and over
as long as its core doesn't break.
**[14:12] Gin**
It can be reborn over and over
as long as it's doused in flames.
**[14:15] Gin**
The flame hasn't gone out, Kusanagi.
**[14:19] Gin**
My flame of life is still burning bright!
**[14:24] Kag**
Gin-chan!
**[14:26] Mag**
I-Impossible! He stuck the
sword into his own butt?
**[14:29] Mag**
C-Could that man be...
**[14:31] Gin**
I'll let you suck me dry
one last time, dumbass.
**[14:35] Gin**
Drink as much of my boiling
blood as you want!
**[14:39] Mag**
No! He's feeding his own blood to Kusanagi?!
**[14:44] Mag**
Is he trying to revive the sword?
**[14:47] Mag**
Doesn't that man care about his own life?
**[14:52] Oki**
He's such a messed-up samurai.
**[14:55] Oki**
Forget protecting himself with a sword.
**[14:57] Oki**
He himself became a scabbard
that protects his sword.
**[15:03] Oki**
Interesting.
**[15:05] Oki**
Boss really
**[15:09] Oki**
is interesting.
**[15:11] Kon**
S-Sogo!
**[15:12] Mag**
Wh-What are you doing?!
**[15:15] Oki**
A duel has to be fair, or it'll be boring.
**[15:18] Oki**
You can dig in if you're hungry, too.
**[15:21] Oki**
*If* you can consume me, that is.
**[15:28] Mag**
Fine! I'll devour every last bit of you!
**[15:40] All**
Gin-san!
**[15:41] Bo**
Sogo!
**[16:10] Shin**
Gin-san... Okita-san...
**[16:15] Kus**
Maganagi, looks like we both found
ourselves some fine scabbards.
**[16:22] Mag**
No doubt.
**[16:30] Mag**
Looks like I was the dull one all along...
**[16:50] Gin**
You...
**[16:51] Oki**
Boss, let's fight with no
distractions next time.
**[16:56] Shin**
Gin-san! Kusanagi-san!
**[16:59] Kag**
You did it! You really did it!
**[17:02] Shin**
You won! Kusanagi-san won!
**[17:05] Kus**
Yeah. It's all thanks to ya guys.
**[17:09] Kus**
Thank ya so much for makin' me
a masterpiece right at the very end.
**[17:18] Shin**
K-Kusanagi-san?
**[17:20] Shin**
How? Why?
**[17:22] Kus**
It's fine. I've been runnin'
on fumes for a long time.
**[17:27] Kus**
I was always prepared for this.
**[17:31] Kus**
Scabberina laid down her life
ta protect our daughter.
**[17:34] Kus**
If I didn't do the same,
how could I face her in heaven?
**[17:41] Shin**
Why are you being so negative?
**[17:44] Shin**
You finally met your daughter!
**[17:46] Shin**
Are you gonna leave her behind
without introducing yourself?!
**[17:54] Kus**
She grew up inta a fine woman.
She really is just like Scabberina.
**[18:01] Kus**
I got ta see that beautiful scabbard
with my own eyes one more time.
**[18:07] Kus**
I'm satisfied with that.
**[18:12] Kus**
She shouldn't have ta live with the death
of a dad who she'd never seen before.
**[18:20] Kus**
She shouldn't need ta bear that cross.
**[18:24] Kus**
As long as she lives strong
with a smile on her face,
**[18:27] Kus**
that's enough for Scabberina and me.
**[18:33] Kus**
So please...
**[18:36] Kus**
I beg ya...
**[18:42] Kus**
Could ya put me ta rest
in that lump of ironsand?
**[18:48] Kus**
In that excaliburling grave,
where I'm sure Scabberina's resting, too.
**[18:56] Kag**
Kusanagi...
**[19:03] Kag**
Gin-chan.
**[19:05] Gin**
Even if you don't exchange any words,
**[19:08] Gin**
even when you're far apart,
**[19:11] Gin**
there are some things you just can't sever.
**[19:14] Gin**
Not by such a dull sword, anyway.
**[19:17] Gin**
You guys will always be connected.
And we'll always be connected to you.
**[19:24] Kus**
Gintoki-han, thank you.
**[19:29] Kus**
I'm truly glad I got ta meet
scabbards like you in the end.
***SIGN*** Smithy
**[19:54] Sac**
Gee, So-kun, are you really
gonna buy a new sword for me?
**[19:59] Oki**
Maybe 'cause I kept wielding strange swords,
**[20:02] Oki**
I don't feel like using a normal one anymore.
**[20:05] Oki**
You too, right? An ordinary Kikuichimonji
can't satisfy you anymore, right?
**[20:10] Oki**
You'd prefer one with pearls
or one that vibrates, right?
**[20:14] Sac**
Eek, So-kun, you perv.
**[20:17] Tet**
I'm sorry, but we don't
sell such filthy swords.
**[20:21] Oki**
That so?
**[20:23] Oki**
And here I thought you picked up some pearls.
**[20:27] Oki**
Ever since that day, the four of you
**[20:29] Oki**
were stuck to the ground there,
desperately picking up something.
**[20:35] Tet**
It was just gravel.
**[20:38] Tet**
But mixed in with that gravel is iron
that's far more valuable than pearls.
**[20:44] Tet**
I'm going to use it all to forge a sword.
**[20:48] Oki**
That sounds like a pain.
**[20:51] Oki**
Well, let me know when you're done.
**[20:54] Tet**
Are you sure?
**[20:56] Tet**
I bet it's going to be the
dullest sword in the universe.
**[20:59] Oki**
Yeah. It doesn't have to cut anything.
**[21:07] Oki**
Because I'm sure the sword and scabbard
are never gonna leave each other again.
***SIGN*** Sneak Peek
***SIGN*** The Bloody Shinsengumi Records
**[21:23] Oki**
Hey, Hijikata.
**[21:26] Oki**
Go get me some yakisoba bread.
**[21:29] Mit**
So-chan!
**[21:31] Mit**
Be polite when speaking to your superiors.
**[21:35] Oki**
I'm sorry, Sister.
**[21:41] Oki**
Hey, Hijikata.
**[21:42] Oki**
Go get me some esteemed yakisoba bread.
**[21:45] Mit**
Well done.
**[21:49] Hij**
Uh, that wasn't all that different.
***SIGN*** The End
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:24] Shin**
Otsu-chan will show up next episode!
**[23:26] Shin**
You all remember that I'm the captain
of the Terakado Otsu fan club, right?
**[23:30] Shin**
Right?
***SIGN*** Wash Your Hands Before a Handshake
**[23:31] Shin**
Next time: "Wash Your
Hands Before a Handshake."
**[23:34] Shin**
Wash up well, Takachin!
***SIGN*** Preview
***SIGN*** Preview
***SIGN*** Beginning Soon
***SIGN*** The Final Arc
**[23:43] Gin**
We've got you covered.
**[23:44] Gin**
From walking your dog to keeping Earth safe,
**[23:47] Gin**
we Odd Jobs will do anything.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Production is smoothly
***SIGN*** you-know-what.
***SIGN*** The final arc was in a situation much like
***SIGN*** a restaurant that doesn't get any orders.
***SIGN*** But it's not like we forgot about it.
***SIGN*** There were just some adult issues at play.
# 337 - Wash Your Hands Before a Handshake
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Otsu**
*The broadcast law can go to hell*
**[00:09] Otsu**
*There's no turning back now*
**[00:16] Otsu**
*Go to hell!*
**[00:20] Otsu**
Everyone, thank you dingleberries!
**[00:23] Shin**
Dingleberries!
**[00:26] Otsu**
*Let's keep this show going anurarihyon!*
**[00:27] Gin**
What's with Otsu-chan lately?
**[00:29] Shin**
Nurarihyon!
**[00:29] Gin**
Hasn't she lost some steam?
**[00:32] Shin**
Not true!
**[00:33] Shin**
As always, any CD she releases
ranks high on the Edocon charts!
**[00:36] Gin**
Sure, but up-and-coming idols
are ranking even higher.
**[00:40] Gin**
Like EDO48 and NippleClo Z.
**[00:43] Gin**
Nowadays, group units are
more popular than solo acts.
**[00:47] Gin**
At this rate, Otsu-chan will lose popularity,
**[00:50] Gin**
fight with her agency over money,
**[00:53] Gin**
and as she fades from memory, re-debut
under some label like ****** or ********.
**[00:59] Shin**
Don't jinx her!
**[01:00] Shin**
The public eye always tends to wander,
**[01:02] Shin**
but only the real deal
will remain in the end!
**[01:04] Shin**
So Terakado Tsu will be the last woman
standing after this Warring Idols Era!
**[01:09] Gin**
Are you stupid? Idols are all just little brats
decked out in dreams and fantasies.
**[01:13] Gin**
There are no fakes or real deals among them.
**[01:16] Gin**
Sure, Otsu-chan is cute and a good singer.
**[01:19] Gin**
But if she stands alone on stage,
**[01:22] Gin**
the audience only gets a vague
idea of how good she is.
**[01:26] Gin**
But if you put her in a
group with five or six uggos,
**[01:29] Gin**
even an idiot could clearly recognize
how cute and how good she is.
**[01:33] Shin**
I don't know if you really need the uggos...
**[01:36] Shin**
But you're right. That's a
group's biggest advantage.
**[01:39] Gin**
Basically,
**[01:41] Gin**
she needs 47 uggos.
**[01:43] Shin**
What kind of 48 is that?!
**[01:45] Shin**
Are they re-enacting the *Chushingura*?!
**[01:47] Gin**
If that's not possible, she can
just go for the 48-position bingo.
**[01:51] Shin**
Why are we back to her
making a *Muteki* debut?!
**[01:53] Shin**
Anyway, a solo act may only go so far,
**[01:56] Shin**
but with some other members who
all make each other look good,
**[01:59] Shin**
Otsu-chan might hit even bigger heights.
**[02:01] Shin**
But where will she find idols who
can compete with her potential?
**[02:06] Sayo**
Otsu-chan really is cute.
**[02:09] Sayo**
I wonder how you become an idol.
**[02:11] Sayo**
I didn't really get it,
**[02:13] Sayo**
but Gin-chan said anyone can
get in by selling pillow talk.
**[02:17] Say**
Really? They sell pillows?
**[02:20] Kag**
Yup. Apparently, for most
idols, that's their main job.
**[02:24] Say**
They're selling pillows while
singing? That must be hard.
**[02:28] P**
You're wrong, miss.
**[02:31] P**
An idol's real job isn't
to sing or sell pillows.
**[02:38] P**
It's to sell dreams.
**[02:41] P**
If you don't mind, could you join us—no,
**[02:45] P**
join Terakado Tsu and
sell dreams together?
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** Wash Your Hands Before a Handshake
**[04:25] Shin**
What?!
**[04:27] Shin**
Kagura-chan, an idol?!
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[04:29] Shin**
And you want to make her
form a unit with Otsu-chan?!
**[04:31] Shin**
Why are you resorting to such crazy schemes?!
**[04:34] Shin**
And you call yourself the agency
that's backed her all this time?!
**[04:37] OMom**
It came as a surprise to me, too.
**[04:40] OMom**
I couldn't believe the scout brought in
**[04:42] OMom**
the girl from Odd Jobs, who'd
helped us out in the past.
**[04:45] Otsu**
But that's one of our scouts
for you. He has a keen eye.
**[04:48] Otsu**
I think Kagura-chan has all
the makings of a fine idol.
**[04:52] Otsu**
She's fair, has that foreign celeb thing going,
and you could even call her pretty.
**[04:57] Otsu**
And most of all, she looks
at home doing anything.
**[04:59] Shin**
Are there any idols who look
at home picking their noses?
**[05:03] Otsu**
Idols pick their noses, too. Even I—
**[05:05] Shin**
No, you don't! Boogers
don't exist for Otsu-chan!
**[05:09] Shin**
Her nostrils are filled with pink,
heart-shaped, sticky hopes and dreams!
**[05:13] Otsu**
Uh, I'm pretty sure boogers would be better.
**[05:16] OMom**
We're in the golden age of idol groups.
**[05:20] OMom**
If Otsu doesn't do something now,
she'll fall behind the times.
**[05:23] OMom**
So we came up with this plan...
***SIGN*** Would you like to sing beside Terakado Tsu?
**[05:25] OMom**
A plan to put her in a limited-time unit.
**[05:28] OMom**
We call it the "Your Partner
Is a ****er" Project.
**[05:29] [SONG] ---**
Your Partner Is a ****er
**[05:31] OMom**
While pairing Otsu with a mysterious no-name
to show a new, charming side of her,
**[05:37] OMom**
we'll unearth a new diamond in the rough
and market her in a package deal with Otsu.
**[05:41] Shin**
Unearth? Dig this mine all you want,
but all you'll find is boogers.
**[05:45] OMom**
They may be boogers now,
**[05:47] OMom**
but with polishing, they could
become boogers harder than diamond.
**[05:50] Shin**
But they'd still be boogers!
**[05:52] OMom**
Anyway, Otsu needs an out-of-the-box partner.
**[05:55] OMom**
Help us out.
**[05:56] Shin**
Please calm down!
**[05:58] Shin**
Do you want to waste all the
hard work she's put in so far?
**[06:01] Shin**
This girl isn't capable of being
an idol and selling dreams!
**[06:03] Shin**
If anything, she was created
to crush the dreams of men!
**[06:06] Shin**
A sad excuse for a Jump heroine!
**[06:10] OMom**
Wow! What was that?
**[06:11] Kag**
I let you talk, but you're
just running your mouth now.
**[06:14] Kag**
My boogers are already harder than diamonds.
**[06:17] Otsu**
She could use that in a hidden
talent contest for stars, Mom!
**[06:21] Otsu**
Do it one more time!
**[06:23] Gin**
Okay, that's enough.
**[06:26] Gin**
Let's start talking business now.
**[06:29] Gin**
She is our agency's main product.
**[06:32] Otsu**
Huh?
**[06:33] Otsu**
Agency? Product?
**[06:35] Gin**
Yes. She's an idol that we developed.
**[06:38] Gin**
For more than a decade since the anime began,
**[06:39] Gin**
she has held firm as the center
heroine and *Gintama's* idol.
**[06:43] Gin**
If we're talking potential, we believe
she far exceeds your Otsu-chan.
**[06:50] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[06:54] Gin**
So, President, we move forward
on this as a co-production?
**[06:58] OMom**
Yes, that's fine, Producer Sakata.
**[07:01] Shin**
Him, a producer? He's just a leech.
**[07:04] OMom**
It seems you weren't lying.
**[07:07] OMom**
Her rhythm and sharp movements...
**[07:09] OMom**
In terms of physical ability,
she far exceeds Otsu.
**[07:13] Gin**
Yeah.
**[07:14] Gin**
No idol in the entire universe
is a match for her on that front.
**[07:17] Gin**
Right, Trainer Shimura?
**[07:19] Shin**
Wait, I'm a trainer?
**[07:22] OMom**
Good looks *and* great performing ability...
**[07:24] OMom**
This may be the birth of a super idol.
**[07:26] OMom**
Right, Manager Shimura?
**[07:28] Shin**
Wait, am I a trainer or a manager? Pick one.
**[07:31] Gin**
The real question is how we market them.
**[07:35] OMom**
I'll let you handle that as the producer.
**[07:39] OMom**
If we're trying to give
Otsu a new kind of appeal,
**[07:42] OMom**
then we should change
how we produce her, too.
**[07:44] OMom**
You can handle it, right?
**[07:46] Gin**
No need to worry. We have an expert
in idol studies on our side.
**[07:50] Gin**
Right, Idol Nerd King?
**[07:51] Shin**
Sorry. Could you give me
a stable role already?
**[07:54] OMom**
Show me what you've got,
Sakata P and Shimura *****.
**[07:59] Shin**
In the end, I'm just a perv?!
**[08:03] Shin**
Hey, Gin-san!
**[08:04] Shin**
Can you really produce idols?
**[08:06] Gin**
As long as Otsu-chan is involved,
**[08:08] Gin**
this will make shitloads
of money, no matter what.
**[08:10] Gin**
We should make them feel as indebted
as possible and fleece them.
**[08:15] Shin**
But Otsu-chan now has that
massive booger stuck to her.
**[08:15] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[08:18] Gin**
What'd I tell you? a diamond shines extra
bright with boogers all around it.
**[08:19] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[08:22] G**
Okay. One, two, three.
**[08:27] Gin**
So, yeah, you'll be working as
Booger Diamonds 48 from today on.
**[08:33] Otsu**
Booger? Wait, that's our unit name, Producer?
**[08:37] Otsu**
I don't know about having "booger" in the name.
**[08:40] Kag**
She's right.
**[08:41] Kag**
As the diamond, I don't mind, but
put yourself in the booger's shoes.
**[08:45] Shin**
Uh, you're the booger here.
**[08:46] Gin**
It may sound Japanese, but "booger" means
"limitless possibilities" in Spanish.
**[08:50] Shin**
That's some impressive BS.
**[08:51] Gin**
It also means "children of B'z and WANDS."
**[08:54] Shin**
Why are you talking about B'z and
WANDS like they're husband and wife?
***SIGN*** A Man's Badge of Honor
**[08:57] Gin**
I wanna market you like the kid brother in
the Yokohama Ginbae. Like Shima Daisuke.
***SIGN*** A Man's Badge of Honor
**[09:02] Shin**
That's so old hat.
**[09:03] Gin**
Right now, we should use the agency's
pull to ride on all the coattails.
**[09:09] Gin**
We'll handle the approvals later.
**[09:10] Shin**
But this is going too far.
They're idols, you know?
**[09:13] Otsu**
I see.
**[09:15] Otsu**
But we should at least make
it a ladies' gang, Producer.
**[09:18] Shin**
That's not the issue here, Otsu-chan.
**[09:20] Kag**
Yeah, Sugimoto Tetta is cooler
than Daisuke, Producer!
**[09:24] Shin**
What do you think idols are?
**[09:26] Shin**
The Daisuke part was all you picked up on!
**[09:29] Gin**
How about this, then?
**[09:31] Gin**
A long time ago, in a galaxy far away,
**[09:34] Gin**
the great artists B'z and WANDS
gave birth to 48 children.
**[09:38] Shin**
Talk about grandiose!
**[09:41] Gin**
The children scattered across the universe.
**[09:43] Gin**
Among them, the twins that were number
48—the last of the children—
**[09:47] Gin**
descended on a planet called Earth...
**[09:49] Shin**
Ah, like how Yukorin said
she was from Planet Korin?
**[09:57] Gin**
...and made waves across the world.
**[09:59] Shin**
Nothing's changed!
**[10:01] Shin**
They just became Daisukerin in the end!
**[10:03] Gin**
Daisukerin was supposed to make waves
worldwide, and Booger Diamonds 48...
**[10:10] Bo**
...always supported him.
**[10:11] Shin**
Enough about Daisuke!
***SIGN*** A Man's Badge of Honor
**[10:12] Shin**
You two are the ones who need support!
**[10:15] Otsu**
But suit-wearing idols
might be a fresh concept.
**[10:18] Otsu**
Wearing pants will limit the fanservice,
but if we wear skirts instead
**[10:22] Otsu**
and have a chic backing band, it could
make for a cool and cute idol aesthetic.
**[10:27] Otsu**
Here we go with "A Woman's Badge of Honor"!
***SIGN*** A Woman's Badge of Honor
**[10:30] Shin**
Uh, the costumes are nice,
but what about the song?
**[10:32] Shin**
It's still stuck to the Daisuke thing.
**[10:34] Kag**
How about this, then?
**[10:36] Kag**
Here we go with "The Mark of a Woman," 'kay?
***SIGN*** The Mark of a Woman
**[10:40] Shin**
Uh, that sounds like something else entirely.
**[10:41] Gin**
This should do it, then.
***SIGN*** That Day of the Month
**[10:45] Shin**
What're you trying to make idols sing?!
**[10:47] Shin**
That's what "A Woman's
Badge of Honor" was about?
**[10:49] Shin**
That's what "The Mark of a Woman" meant?!
**[10:51] Gin**
Hey, don't jump to conclusions.
**[10:54] Gin**
By "that day of the month," we mean...
***SIGN*** That Day of the Month
**[10:57] Gin**
...that day when there's a lot of
Daisuke in the backing band.
**[10:59] Shin**
What kinda day is that?!
**[11:00] Shin**
You again? You came home with your
tail between your legs again?!
**[11:04] Shin**
What happened to going into politics?!
**[11:06] Gin**
Daisukerin made a comeback to
showbiz, and Booger Diamonds 48...
**[11:11] Bo**
...still supports him!
**[11:13] Shin**
Forget about Daisuke already!
**[11:16] Shin**
Anyway, why don't we look at the big picture?
**[11:20] Shin**
What kind of personalities
will they be playing?
**[11:23] Gin**
They're B'z and WANDS's children, right?
**[11:25] Gin**
They can just end every sentence with "zu."
**[11:27] Tamo**
Here are our guests for today.
**[11:29] Bo**
Hello. We are Booger Diamondzu 48zu.
**[11:33] Shin**
They sound like hicks. Sounds
like they're speaking a dialect.
**[11:35] Crowd**
Right.
**[11:37] Gin**
Then instead of "zu," let's go with "z."
***SIGN*** Zu
**[11:39] Tamo**
Cut your hair?
**[11:40] Kag**
I did, yezzz...
**[11:41] Shin**
She fell asleep!
**[11:43] Crowd**
Right.
**[11:44] Gin**
Forget "z," then. Let's go with "s."
**[11:46] Kag**
Lost your hair?
**[11:48] Shin**
She just became a sadist!
**[11:49] Crowd**
Right.
**[11:50] Gin**
Let's do this, then.
**[11:52] Kag**
It's time for a short break, I'll never
hurt you in all my love and selfishness.
**[11:57] Otsu**
Don't change the channel, let's rend this
moment with bullets from a rusty gun!
**[12:01] Shin**
Those verbal tics are too long!
**[12:02] Shin**
Why song titles as a verbal tic?
That's too much love and selfishness!
**[12:05] Shin**
Tamo-san will rust away
before they finish talking!
**[12:08] Gin**
Quit complaining when you
don't have any ideas.
**[12:11] Gin**
I can't work with you, let's break
up and I'll vanish from before you.
**[12:15] Shin**
Why's the producer using
Ohguro Maki song titles, too?
**[12:17] Gin**
This is a pain.
**[12:18] Gin**
Why don't we just have B'z and
WANDS be the backing bands?
**[12:21] Shin**
That'd just be a B'z and WANDS concert!
**[12:23] Shin**
They'd eat us alive!
**[12:25] Tae**
Shin-chan's right.
**[12:27] Tae**
You're on the right track with B'z and WANDS,
**[12:31] Tae**
but you're overlooking something
important, Producer Sakata.
**[12:35] Shin**
Sis?
**[12:37] Tae**
Sorry for barging in.
**[12:39] Tae**
I heard Kagura-chan was going to
debut, so I wanted to cheer her on.
**[12:43] Tae**
Here, I brought refreshments.
**[12:44] Kag**
Boss lady!
**[12:46] Tae**
I was just going to give you this and leave,
**[12:48] Tae**
but I couldn't let it slide.
**[12:50] Otsu**
Wow! What is this?
**[12:52] Tae**
Producer Sakata.
**[12:54] Tae**
You don't understand a thing.
**[12:56] Tae**
All you're thinking about is how to market,
how to make the audience happy.
**[12:59] Tae**
It's all about the audience.
**[13:02] Tae**
But the enemy isn't only in front of you.
**[13:05] Tae**
The real enemy lurks behind the girls.
**[13:09] Tae**
The backing band and backup dancers.
**[13:11] Tae**
Don't you know how many
idols they've gobbled up?
**[13:15] Shin**
What're you talking about?!
**[13:16] Tae**
Think back to Asa**** **** and Ham*** ******
**[13:20] Tae**
and how backup whatevers are always
taking idols from the back.
**[13:25] Shin**
Yes, it happens a lot, but so what?!
**[13:26] Tae**
They pretend to be on the idols' side,
**[13:29] Tae**
but they always target them
from the defenseless back,
**[13:33] Tae**
sharpening their nails to strike.
**[13:35] Tae**
And the moment the idol
gives them an opening...
**[13:37] BD**
Gotcha!
**[13:38] Shin**
That backup dancer is way too scary!
**[13:41] Tae**
In showbiz, the talent are products.
**[13:45] Tae**
Those in the business should never
ignore the fans and defile that product.
**[13:50] Shin**
Otsu-chan!
**[13:52] Shin**
Uh, an idol is about to die
thanks to your refreshments!
**[13:56] Tae**
And you men should be aware how
idols are expected to stay pure.
**[14:01] Tae**
Not putting careful thought into choosing
the backing band is simply preposterous.
**[14:05] Tae**
You must reconsider at once.
**[14:08] Gin**
Like you'd know anything, outsider.
**[14:10] Gin**
Who would you place at the back, then?
**[14:14] Kyu**
On guitar, Kyubei!
**[14:18] Tsu**
On b-bass, Tsukuyo!
**[14:21] Sac**
On drums, Sacchan!
**[14:24] Tae**
On castanets, Otae!
**[14:27] Tae**
Together, the four of us...
**[14:28] All**
...are Diamond Vacuum!
**[14:30] Shin**
You totally wanna eat Otsu-chan alive, too!
**[14:32] Shin**
Where'd you come from,
you brain-dead backing band?!
**[14:35] Sac**
What're you saying?
**[14:37] Sac**
We, Diamond Vacuum, had promised to make
our music debut long before you guys.
**[14:42] Kyu**
Our chance has finally arrived, Otae-chan.
**[14:44] Shin**
No chance in hell! Get outta here!
**[14:47] Tae**
We get it.
**[14:49] Tae**
We're okay with being the backing band.
**[14:51] Tae**
But please don't forget what I said about
an idol's enemies lurking behind her.
**[14:56] Gin**
What are you plotting?!
**[14:57] Gin**
And what do you mean,
"on castanets"? You're useless!
**[15:01] Tsu**
Hey, what's "bass"?
**[15:03] Tsu**
What, do I have to hit a ball
with this thing and run to base?
**[15:07] Gin**
Who brought this bum here?!
**[15:09] Shin**
Get out! All of you get out!
**[15:12] OMom**
*Producer Sakata is good.*
**[15:14] OMom**
*He's even got a backing band full of beauties.*
**[15:17] OMom**
*This is sure to spur Otsu on.*
**[15:21] OMom**
Otsu, if you slack off,
you really will be eaten alive.
**[15:25] OMom**
Do your best.
**[15:28] Otsu**
Who am I?
**[15:32] OMom**
Otsu!
***SIGN*** Debut Single
An Idol's Badge of Honor
**[15:50] S**
Looks like Terakado Tsu's making her move.
**[15:52] S**
Booger Diamonds 48, huh?
**[15:56] S**
I don't know where she found this
partner, but she's pretty cute.
**[16:01] S**
She truly looks boorish and uncultured,
**[16:05] S**
like the poster girl of a
diner out in the sticks.
**[16:08] S**
The perfect partner for her.
**[16:13] S**
She should've quietly
faded away as a solo act.
**[16:18] S**
Does she really think she can
beat us with this partner?
**[16:22] S**
Terakado Tsu and Booger Diamonds 48.
**[16:26] S**
I can't wait to see what a top
idol on Earth is like.
**[16:32] G**
Wh-What the hell is this?
**[16:34] G**
Otsu-chan is making a unit debut?
**[16:36] Taka**
This ain't funny! Who the
hell is this booger girl?
**[16:40] G**
We've always worshiped Otsu-chan
as the one true goddess!
**[16:43] G**
How dare they defile her
with this package deal?!
**[16:47] G**
As her fanclub, we will
never accept this unit!
**[16:50] G**
Yeah, yeah!
**[16:52] G**
This is bad.
**[16:54] G**
Let Captain Shimura know at once!
**[16:58] Kag**
Manager Shimura!
**[17:00] Otsu**
What're you doing over there?
**[17:02] Kag**
Idols are busy people! Get me my
sukonbu already, you rotten manager!
**[17:07] G**
Manager Shimura?
**[17:09] G**
Captain!
**[17:10] G**
And Otsu-chan, too!
**[17:12] G**
What's the meaning of this, Captain?!
**[17:14] G**
Surely you didn't make her do this...
**[17:16] Shin**
No, that's not it!
**[17:18] Shin**
Hey, wait up!
**[17:22] Shin**
Don't leave me behind!
**[17:25] [SONG] Sign**
Studio Edo
**[17:26] Otsu**
*La la la, idol*
**[17:32] Kag**
* Accel, consul, it's dreams*
* that we sell, 'kay?*
**[17:38] Gin**
*Wait, time out.*
**[17:39] Gin**
Quit mixing in the 'kays, Kagura.
You're ruining the lyrics.
**[17:43] Gin**
Just forget about your character
and lay yourself bare.
**[17:47] Gin**
Try being plain old Kugimiya-san.
**[17:50] Shin**
Aw, the one place where I could shine...
**[17:54] Shin**
Producer Sakata, did you
see how the fans reacted?
**[17:57] Shin**
What now? Nobody wants this unit.
**[18:01] Gin**
Don't worry.
**[18:02] Gin**
I've got a huge event lined
up for the CD's release.
**[18:06] Gin**
The backing band's making
adjustments for it, too.
**[18:06] Tsu**
Why do I have to do this?
**[18:08] Gin**
As long as we create enough hype
by then, it won't be a problem.
**[18:11] Gin**
You fell in love with Otsu-chan when
you watched her street concerts, right?
**[18:16] Gin**
Real popularity is always built
up slowly and steadily like that.
**[18:20] Gin**
People who become fans overnight
also leave overnight.
**[18:23] Gin**
There are no shortcuts in
showbiz, Manager Shimura.
**[18:27] Shin**
That's true.
**[18:29] Gin**
I feel bad for Otsu-chan, but she'll
have to forget she's a top idol
***SIGN*** Pillow Talk Meet
***SIGN*** As long as you give us money, we'll sell you dreams, pillows, or whatever.
**[18:33] Gin**
and start over from sales.
***SIGN*** Pillow Talk Meet
**[18:37] Shin**
What's slow and steady about this?!
**[18:38] Shin**
What do you mean, pillow talk meet?
**[18:40] Shin**
What're you trying to make idols do?!
**[18:42] Gin**
It's basically a meet-and-greet.
**[18:44] Gin**
You know how "idols you can
meet" are all the rage?
**[18:47] Gin**
We'll go with "idols you can pillow talk."
**[18:49] Shin**
You can't call those idols!
**[18:51] Gin**
Relax. I know it says pillow talk,
***SIGN*** Otsu
**[18:54] Gin**
but this is just a meet-and-greet where
we sell expensive autographed pillows.
**[18:57] Shin**
That's basically a scam!
***SIGN*** Kagura
**[19:00] G**
Pillow talk with Otsu-chan!
**[19:03] Shin**
A whole horde of men showed
up with the wrong idea!
**[19:06] Gin**
Looks like it worked.
**[19:08] Shin**
Like hell! This is too risky!
**[19:10] Gin**
Meet-and-greets are always full of risks.
**[19:13] Gin**
All idol nerds touch their
d*cks before going to those.
**[19:17] Gin**
The idols and fans both get covered in d*ck.
**[19:19] Gin**
In the end, it just becomes
d*cks shaking hands with d*cks.
**[19:22] Shin**
What kind of risk are
you even talking about?!
**[19:23] Kag**
Ugh, are you serious? That's horrible.
**[19:26] Kag**
Make them disinfect before shaking hands.
**[19:28] Shin**
An idol with her hand covered
in boogers shouldn't talk!
**[19:31] Otsu**
It's okay. If this made me lose heart,
I'd never make it as an idol.
**[19:35] Gin**
That's a pro for you.
**[19:36] Gin**
Don't worry. We'll protect
you if anything happens.
**[19:40] Kag**
Promise?
**[19:42] Kag**
Come save us at once if
anyone dangerous shows up.
**[19:45] Shin**
The idol's more dangerous!
**[19:46] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:48] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:49] Shin**
Wait, wait, wait!
**[19:50] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:52] Shin**
Forget meet-and-greet! This has become
Hanayama Kaoru's Vice Grip Meet!
**[19:52] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:54] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:56] Kag**
Okay, next.
**[19:57] Kag**
Huh? I'm not supposed to
send them to the pillows?
**[20:00] Shin**
This isn't what pillow business means!
**[20:01] Shin**
They're all dying off before they
can reach Otsu-chan, their goal!
**[20:04] G**
Screw you! I came here 'cause I heard
I could pillow talk with Otsu-chan!
**[20:08] G**
We can't even shake her hand like this!
**[20:10] G**
Gimme back my money!
**[20:12] Shin**
This is bad, Producer Sakata!
**[20:14] Shin**
We won't get popular like
this! We'll get sued!
**[20:16] Gin**
Rest assured. All of this
was just a sideshow.
**[20:19] Gin**
The main event starts now.
***SIGN*** Otsu
***SIGN*** Kagura
**[20:21] Gin**
Anyone who buys a pillow
**[20:23] Gin**
will get a Booger Diamonds
48 lap pillow coupon!
**[20:28] Shin**
What do you think you're saying, Gin-san?
**[20:30] Gin**
What's wrong with lap pillows?
It's not like they lose anything.
**[20:33] Kag**
Yeah, sounds good.
**[20:35] Kag**
Take this.
**[20:35] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:37] Shin**
There's nothing good about this!
**[20:38] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:39] Shin**
Who asked you to use that
random martial art?!
**[20:40] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:41] Kag**
Lap Pillow Punch!
**[20:42] Shin**
What the hell is a Lap Pillow
Punch? It's just a knee strike!
**[20:45] Kag**
I sleep better with a hard pillow.
**[20:48] Shin**
Nobody cares about your pillow preferences!
**[20:51] Shin**
I know you sleep like a log,
but that doesn't matter!
**[20:53] C**
Knock it off! We're not here
to visit some S&M club!
**[20:56] C**
You really call yourself idols?!
**[20:58] Shin**
Sakata P!
**[20:59] Gin**
That was a sideshow, too.
***SIGN*** Otsu
***SIGN*** Kagura
**[21:01] Gin**
Anyone who buys a pillow
**[21:03] Gin**
will get to sleep for a tiny bit with
Booger Diamonds 48 on that very pillow!
**[21:08] Kag**
Zzz...
**[21:10] Kag**
No, that's my Happy Turn!
**[21:14] Gin**
That was a sideshow, too!
**[21:16] Gin**
If you buy right here and now,
**[21:18] Gin**
you get a special price of 49,800 yen
and 4 bonus pillow storage boxes!
**[21:23] Shin**
Now you're just Suckerta
on the TV Shopping Network!
**[21:25] G**
What the hell is wrong with these guys?
**[21:27] G**
Screw this! Let's bounce!
**[21:29] Shin**
Hey, wait!
**[21:32] S**
Aw, the poor things. How could
you be so mean to your fans?
**[21:37] S**
To idols, the fans are gods.
**[21:40] S**
We would never let you look
so sad when you leave.
**[21:47] G**
That's...
**[21:47] S**
Why? Because...
**[21:51] S**
Tubular!
**[21:52] S**
We provide dreams to all of space
**[21:55] S**
as the special unit of galactic idols.
**[21:57] S**
That is why.
**[22:01] Shin**
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48?!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] Kag**
What's with these girls?
**[23:41] Kag**
I can't believe they can
say "tubular" when sober.
**[23:43] Kag**
We'll see if you can maintain that attitude
after you watch our meet-and-greet.
***SIGN*** Diamonds are Unscratchable
**[23:47] Kag**
Next time: "Diamonds are Unscratchable."
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:50] S**
They might not let us, even
if this is a late-night slot.
***SIGN*** We've already pulled all kinds of crap over the years.
***SIGN*** What can they possibly be planning to pull now?
***SIGN*** When GKB48 challenge them,
***SIGN*** how will BDZ48 respond?!
# 338 - Diamonds are Unscratchable
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** Diamonds are Unscratchable
***SIGN*** GKB48's Request!! Watch this program in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV ♥
**[01:40] S**
We would never let you
leave looking so sad.
**[01:46] S**
Why? Because...
**[01:47] S**
We provide dreams to all of space
**[01:51] S**
as the special unit of galactic idols.
**[01:54] S**
That is why.
**[01:56] G**
That's...
**[01:59] Shin**
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48?!
**[02:02] Shin**
Why are they on Earth?
**[02:04] Bi**
Guys, come to our meet-and-greet and wipe
this bitter taste out of your mouths.
**[02:10] Bi**
Otherwise your Bitchie will
be so lonely, she'll cry.
**[02:14] G**
I-I can't believe I get to
meet the universe's top idols!
**[02:18] G**
Is this some dream or fantasy?!
**[02:20] G**
I'm going first!
**[02:21] G**
No, I am!
**[02:23] Gin**
Wait, what? Giant Knobhead Bitches 48?
**[02:27] Shin**
No way... They're here in Edo?
**[02:30] Shin**
They are Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48.
**[02:33] Shin**
On several planets, top idol groups
faced off in a public vote,
**[02:35] Shin**
and only the centers whose
groups placed at the top—
**[02:38] Shin**
in other words, only the top of the
top idols from across the galaxy—
**[02:42] Shin**
formed this top idol group!
**[02:43] Gin**
How many times are you gonna say "top"?
**[02:44] Shin**
They're the biggest idols in the galaxy!
**[02:47] Shin**
They traverse planets, nabbing
the top idol spot on each one,
**[02:50] Shin**
then move on to their next target.
**[02:51] Shin**
If that special unit of idols is here in
Edo and showed up in front of Otsu-chan,
**[02:57] Shin**
that must mean their next target is...
**[03:00] Bi**
Terakado Tsu.
**[03:01] Bi**
We got a good look at how
Edo's top idol does sales.
**[03:05] Bi**
I'm amazed you sit at the
top of the pile like that.
**[03:08] Bi**
It seems Edo has the weakest idols
of all the planets we've been to.
**[03:15] Bi**
Let us show you how real idols
**[03:19] Bi**
do meet-and-greets.
**[03:21] Shin**
A-Are those...
**[03:23] Bi**
Line up and come in one by one, guys.
**[03:26] Bi**
We want to spend quality
time with each of you.
**[03:30] Shin**
Why have closed spaces if
they're only gonna shake hands?
**[03:33] Taka**
Challenge accepted. I'll go first.
**[03:37] Shin**
Taka-chin?
**[03:39] Taka**
You ran your mouth at Otsu-chan.
**[03:41] Taka**
If this meet-and-greet ain't up to
scratch, you'll be in real trouble.
**[03:45] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[03:46] Taka**
Sorry, Shin-chan.
**[03:47] Taka**
I honestly don't understand what you're
trying to do with Otsu-chan right now.
**[03:54] Taka**
But I believe that you'll
protect her to the end.
**[04:01] Taka**
I believe that she would
never lose to these hussies!
**[04:05] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:09] Taka**
Huh? Seriously?
**[04:10] Taka**
Is this how it works?
**[04:12] Gin**
Uh, why is it shaking?
**[04:13] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:16] Gin**
Huh? Was he in his undies just now?
**[04:17] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:18] Gin**
I hear weird noises. What is that?
What's going on?
**[04:21] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:22] Gin**
He was totally butt-naked!
What're they doing?
**[04:24] Gin**
Are they really shaking hands?
**[04:26] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:28] Gin**
Uh, hold up. What is this?
**[04:30] Gin**
They're not shaking hands at all. They're
doing something totally different.
**[04:32] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:34] Gin**
What is that? Something just came out.
**[04:35] Gin**
What's going on in there?
What're you guys doing?
**[04:38] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:39] Gin**
Now his whole body's covered in pixels!
What happened to him?
**[04:41] Gin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:42] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:43] Gin**
Taka-chin?
**[04:43] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:45] Gin**
Taka-chin?
**[04:45] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:46] Gin**
Taka-chin?!
**[04:47] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:51] Shin**
Taka-chin!
**[04:52] Shin**
Pull yourself together, Taka-chin!
**[04:54] Shin**
What happened, Taka-chin?!
**[04:58] Taka**
Once I get home, I'm gonna
burn all my porn mags.
**[05:02] Shin**
What'd they do to you?!
**[05:03] Gin**
What'd they do to him?
They clearly just did him!
**[05:06] Gin**
They totally got down and dirty.
**[05:08] Gin**
He looks like he released everything he had
pent up. He's basking in the afterglow.
**[05:11] Shin**
Taka-chin, tell me what happened inside.
**[05:14] Taka**
Everything turned white.
**[05:16] Gin**
Crap! Now he's turned completely white!
**[05:19] G**
Once I get home, I'll try being nicer to Mom.
**[05:21] G**
I'll try to find something
good about Kamiji Yusuke.
**[05:24] Shin**
Hey! People are getting enlightened
in the afterglow one after another!
**[05:27] Gin**
Wait, are you kidding me?
**[05:28] Gin**
Seriously? Is this for real?
**[05:29] Gin**
What, do they shake something
other than hands on their planets?
**[05:33] Gin**
Are you kidding me? Seriously?
Is this for real?
**[05:35] Shin**
Calm down, Gin-san!
**[05:38] Bi**
Our meet-and-greet made
everyone weak in the knees.
**[05:46] Bi**
Terakado Tsu, we've rendered all
your fans completely spineless.
**[05:50] Bi**
They're wrapped around our fingers.
**[05:54] Bi**
This is what real idols are capable of.
**[05:57] Bi**
What the greatest galactic
idol group is capable of.
**[06:00] Bi**
What Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48 is capable of.
**[06:03] Gin**
Uh, idols? You're practically
just pr*******es!
**[06:06] Bi**
What? How mean!
**[06:08] Bi**
You know nothing about me!
**[06:11] Bi**
You know nothing about
what we were doing inside!
**[06:16] Bi**
If you suspect us that much,
why don't you try it yourself...
**[06:19] Bi**
Our meet-and-greet.
**[06:21] Gin**
I'll take the special course, please.
**[06:22] Bi**
Meet-and-greet.
**[06:23] Gin**
I can start a tab with you, right?
**[06:25] Shin**
Like hell!
**[06:26] Tsu**
No... My fans, who've been
behind me all this time...
**[06:26] Crowd**
All hail Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48!
**[06:30] Tsu**
The ones who've supported
me all this time...
**[06:33] Tsu**
In one moment, they all just...
**[06:39] Tsu**
No...
**[06:43] Tsu**
This can't be.
**[06:46] Tsu**
This can't be happening!
**[06:48] Shin**
Otsu-chan!
**[06:48] Gin**
H-Hey! How long are you
gonna sleep, you dumbass?!
**[06:51] Shin**
Wait, Otsu-chan!
**[06:54] Gin**
We still have a bunch of pillow
sales events lined up after this!
**[06:57] Gin**
Hey!
**[07:00] Bi**
She went down far easier than expected.
**[07:03] Crowd**
All hail Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48!
**[07:03] Bi**
But this isn't enough.
**[07:05] Bi**
Getting these core idol fans on
our side doesn't mean a thing.
**[07:09] Bi**
All of Edo must watch as Terakado Tsu
and Booger Diamonds 48 fall to pieces.
**[07:17] Bi**
They need to know that we, Galaxy Kingdom
Bitches 48, are the greatest idols alive.
**[07:23] Bi**
Showtime is only just beginning.
**[07:29] Shin**
I see.
**[07:30] Shin**
Otsu-chan's still holed up?
**[07:33] OMom**
She seems to be taking it really hard.
**[07:36] Shin**
Sorry. It's all our fault
for being so useless.
**[07:39] OMom**
Oh, no. I made her form a unit to put
her under this exact kind of pressure.
**[07:45] OMom**
But I can't believe they came
gunning for Otsu at the same time.
**[07:49] OMom**
She's hit rock bottom, and
she may not climb back up.
**[07:53] Shin**
Otsu-chan will definitely bounce back!
**[07:56] Shin**
She'd never lose to those people!
**[07:57] Gin**
Yeah. Right now, we don't
stand to make any mon—
**[08:00] Gin**
I mean, make a decent impression,
so give us a chance to turn this around.
**[08:03] Kag**
Otsu's not alone.
**[08:05] Kag**
If she's hit rock bottom,
there's still something I,
**[08:08] Kag**
along with Booger Diamonds 48,
can do to help her.
**[08:11] Kag**
I want her to remember that.
**[08:15] OMom**
There's nothing any of you can do.
**[08:18] OMom**
I mean...
***SIGN*** Terakado Tsu Cries Outside a Love Hotel!!
***SIGN*** Producer Carries BDZ48 Member Home!
**[08:23] OMom**
You're all down there with her.
**[08:36] R**
There they are!
**[08:37] R**
It's Booger Diamonds 48's
producer, Mr. Sakata!
**[08:41] R**
What was Otsu-chan doing
in front of a love hotel?
**[08:44] R**
Is it true that you're using
your position as producer
**[08:46] R**
to screw around with your agency's idols?
**[08:49] Shin**
You've got the wrong idea!
**[08:50] Shin**
I was the one who was with
Otsu-chan! I'm her manager!
**[08:53] Shin**
We were just talking about work—
**[08:55] R**
So the producer and manager are both
screwing around with their agency's idols?
**[08:59] Shin**
Did you listen to a word I said?!
**[09:00] R**
Well?
**[09:01] Gin**
You know they're gonna twist
your words, Shinpachi.
**[09:04] Gin**
Just get through it by saying
"Whatever. I don't care."
**[09:06] Shin**
They'll twist that even worse!
**[09:07] Gin**
We've done nothing wrong.
No need to run or hide.
**[09:10] Kag**
That's right.
**[09:12] Kag**
Besides, Gin-chan and I have gone long
past "taking home." We live together.
**[09:17] R**
What do you mean, you live together?
**[09:19] Kag**
He keeps me at home without pay
**[09:20] Kag**
and makes me do all kinds of stuff from
morning to night until I can't stand.
**[09:25] Kag**
Nothing wrong with that.
**[09:27] Shin**
Everything about that sounds wrong!
**[09:28] R**
Sakata-san, are you a lolicon p**o?
**[09:31] Gin**
I'm not a p**o! The P stands for producer!
**[09:33] Gin**
I'm not a lolicon, either!
**[09:34] R**
So you're a p**o P?
**[09:36] Gin**
Knock it off already, you rotten cue ball!
**[09:38] R**
Did you hear that verbal abuse?
**[09:42] Tsu**
I no longer have any fans cheering me on.
**[09:47] TV**
*Showbiz really is seedy, huh?*
**[09:49] TV**
*Well, everyone in the entertainment
business is like this.*
**[09:49] Tsu**
I don't have anyone on my side.
**[09:53] TV**
*Should've seen it coming.*
***SIGN*** Otsu and Her Manager
***SIGN*** Super Edo Scoop
**[09:55] Shin**
Otsu-chan's in big trouble,
and it's all our fault!
**[09:58] Gin**
Tch.
**[09:59] Gin**
Who woulda thought this would happen right
before the release of the debut single?
**[10:02] OMom**
We've been had.
**[10:04] OMom**
The background on this
photograph has been shopped.
**[10:08] OMom**
In other words, you were used
in a plot to bring Otsu down...
**[10:13] OMom**
by Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48.
**[10:16] Shin**
Th-They were behind this?
**[10:18] OMom**
They're a special squad that has destroyed
top idols on all kinds of planets.
**[10:22] OMom**
They're not picky about their methods.
**[10:24] Shin**
They'll pay for this.
**[10:25] Shin**
Let's expose their tactics and condemn them!
**[10:28] OMom**
They have tremendous influence
with media across the galaxy.
**[10:32] OMom**
It'll never see the light of day.
**[10:34] Gin**
At this point, our only choice is to
upload a shaved-head apology video.
**[10:39] Shin**
Even if you hate me, the manager,
**[10:41] Shin**
please don't come to hate Booger Diamonds 48!
**[10:44] Shin**
What part do you think you're shaving off?!
**[10:45] Kag**
Or we'll have to put fries
and Shinpachi side-by-side
**[10:48] Kag**
and upload a video about
which one will rot sooner.
**[10:50] Shin**
Your brains are what's rotten!
**[10:52] OMom**
Too late for that too, apparently.
They got the jump on us.
**[10:57] Bi**
*Greetings, earthlings!*
**[10:59] Bi**
*We are the special unit of galactic idols,*
**[11:02] Bi**
*Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48!*
**[11:05] Bi**
* As it turns out, we're going*
* to make our debut on Earth!*
**[11:10] All**
*Yay!*
**[11:12] Bi**
* Our new single, "A Slut's Badge*
* of Honor," releases December 10th.*
**[11:16] Shin**
December 10th? The same release date
as Booger Diamonds 48's debut single?
**[11:20] Gin**
They're even going with a similar title.
**[11:22] Bi**
* With that in mind, we plan to hold*
* a release event at Oedo Dome.*
**[11:29] Bi**
* But since that alone wouldn't*
* be exciting enough,*
**[11:31] Bi**
*we've got some big guests lined up.*
**[11:33] Bi**
*Surprise!*
**[11:35] Bi**
* We want to invite Edo's top idol,*
* Terakado Tsu-chan, to this event!*
**[11:41] Shin**
Wha?!
**[11:42] Bi**
*We don't have an appointment yet, but...*
**[11:44] Bi**
* Terakado Tsu-san, why don't we face*
* off to determine Edo's top idol?*
**[11:50] Bi**
*Us, Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48,*
**[11:54] Bi**
*versus Terakado Tsu's Booger Diamonds 48?*
**[11:58] Bi**
* Let's compete to see which of us can*
* charm more fans in a meet-and-greet.*
**[12:03] Bi**
* The winner gets to perform*
* their new single live.*
**[12:06] Bi**
* But the loser has to retire from the*
* idol industry right then and there.*
**[12:12] Bi**
* It's a battle to determine the top idol.*
* There has to be some risk involved.*
**[12:17] Bi**
*Let's settle this, Terakado Tsu-san.*
**[12:19] Bi**
*You were once the top idol in all of Edo.*
**[12:23] Bi**
* We trust you won't run*
* away from this challenge.*
***SIGN*** Up Next The Making of Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48's "A Slut's Badge of Honor"
***SIGN*** Cancel
**[12:29] Shin**
Th-That was...
**[12:31] OMom**
Well played.
**[12:32] OMom**
Now that they've released
this video to the public,
**[12:35] OMom**
our reputation will be ruined if we refuse.
**[12:37] Gin**
For someone so cute, she sure can play dirty.
**[12:40] Gin**
Kingdom Bitches is a fitting name, I say.
**[12:42] OMom**
The words "idol" and "bitch"
are practically synonyms.
**[12:45] OMom**
They're several times
better at this than Otsu.
**[12:48] Shin**
That's a hell of a thing for the
president of an idol agency to say.
**[12:52] OMom**
But we can't put her idol career on
the line, even if it makes us lose face.
**[12:57] OMom**
And having lost all her fans,
Otsu stands no chance—
**[12:59] Shin**
Not all of them.
**[13:02] Shin**
She still has three fans right here.
**[13:05] Kag**
Relax. I won't cause any trouble.
**[13:08] Kag**
An idol digs out her boogers
with her own hands.
**[13:11] Gin**
And besides, we Booger Diamonds 48
**[13:14] Gin**
are fully prepared to be the boogers that
make Otsu-chan's diamond shine bright.
**[13:20] OMom**
You guys...
**[13:22] Shin**
Until now, Otsu-chan has given
us hopes and dreams as an idol.
**[13:28] Shin**
Now, it's our turn as fans to return the
favor by giving *her* hopes and dreams.
**[13:40] [SONG] Sign**
Oedo Dome
**[13:41] Bi**
Hello, everyone!
**[13:43] Bi**
Thanks for coming to see us today!
**[13:48] Bi**
We are the idols of the entire universe...
**[13:51] Bi**
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48!
**[13:55] Bi**
And here is the group that
accepted our challenge...
**[13:59] Kag**
Heya. We are Booger Diamonds 48.
**[14:02] Bi**
Yeah, right!
**[14:04] Bi**
Where's Otsu? You're just
three piles of boogers now!
**[14:08] Bi**
What kinda nostrils did you pop out of?!
**[14:11] Gin**
We took responsibility for causing a
scandal by shaving our heads down there.
**[14:15] Gin**
We are the newest members...
**[14:16] Shin**
Pachie!
**[14:17] Gin**
Pako!
**[14:19] Bi**
You call that taking responsibility?!
**[14:21] Bi**
You've gotta be kidding me.
**[14:22] Bi**
We're here for Terakado Tsu! We don't
give two hoots about you morons!
**[14:26] Kag**
Right back at ya. Otsu says she has
no time to waste on knobhead bitches.
**[14:33] Kag**
But we decided to drop by while
chasing our boogers too far in.
**[14:37] Kag**
You should be grateful to us.
**[14:38] Bi**
Say what, you booger brat?
**[14:40] Com**
Oh, my! Sparks are already
flying on the stage!
**[14:44] Com**
Booger Diamonds 48 and Galaxy
Kingdom Bitches 48...
**[14:48] Com**
Will their meet-and-greet with the fans
turn into a World Martial Arts Tournament?
**[14:53] Tae**
Fine by us.
**[14:54] Tae**
We don't care if you're a special
unit of galactic idols or whatever.
**[14:58] Tae**
But if you want to settle things with
force, then we'll gladly play along.
**[15:02] Tae**
Just know that you won't stand
a chance in hell of winning.
**[15:06] Tae**
Not when you're against the strongest
combat backing band in the galaxy,
**[15:10] Tae**
Diamond Vacuum.
**[15:13] Shin**
Sis!
**[15:14] Gin**
So they made it.
**[15:15] Com**
Whoa! Booger Diamonds 48 had
a real ace up their sleeve!
**[15:20] Com**
A group of hotties comparable to
Otsu-chan has taken the stage!
**[15:24] Kyu**
We're saying we'll battle you
in your arena and on your terms.
**[15:28] Kyu**
Get back, before we render
your pretty faces useless.
**[15:32] Sac**
How dare you frame our producer?
**[15:35] Sac**
The one sleeping with Producer Sakata is me!
**[15:38] Gin**
What are you even here for?
**[15:40] Tsu**
I don't know how things ended up
like this, but this too is fate.
**[15:44] Tsu**
No matter in what arena, I refuse
to lose any battles I take part in.
**[15:49] Tsu**
I'll show you the fruits of my training.
**[15:51] Gin**
What the hell did you guys train for?!
**[15:53] Gin**
Don't just do whatever the hell you please!
**[15:54] Bi**
I see.
**[15:56] Bi**
Otsu ran from us, so you
tried to make up for that
**[15:59] Bi**
by hastily gathering trash
that's nothing but looks?
**[16:03] Bi**
Man, I've never felt this insulted before.
**[16:09] Bi**
Fine. If that's how you want to
play, we'll kill your careers
**[16:15] Bi**
and crush you so thoroughly that Otsu will
never think about taking the stage again.
**[16:22] Bi**
Let's determine the greatest idols
in the universe right here and now.
**[16:28] Com**
Fight fair and square!
**[16:31] Com**
The battle to determine the greatest
idols alive is now underway.
**[16:35] Com**
This battle between Galaxy Kingdom
Bitches 48 and Booger Diamonds 48
**[16:41] Com**
will be decided by how many fans flock
to their respective meet-and-greets.
**[16:41] All**
Pleased to meet you all!
**[16:44] Com**
Whoa, as soon as the bell rings, a
tidal wave of people comes rushing in.
**[16:48] Com**
Incredible!
**[16:49] Com**
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48!
**[16:52] Com**
It's like they're gobbling up every fan in
the arena! What overwhelming popularity!
**[16:56] Com**
Meanwhile, Booger Diamonds 48's
base is tumbleweed central!
**[17:00] Com**
They may have a bunch of hotties,
but they're still newly debuted nobodies.
**[17:04] Com**
Was it too soon for them to take on
the galaxy's greatest idol group?
**[17:09] Bi**
Otsu or no Otsu, the outcome was
decided before it even started.
**[17:14] Bi**
Didn't you realize that?
**[17:15] Bi**
In truth, this was never a battle to
determine the greatest idols alive.
**[17:20] Bi**
It's just a public execution.
**[17:22] Gin**
That so? Either way, you shouldn't
get distracted during a battle.
**[17:27] Bi**
Don't you get it? This can't
even be called a battle.
**[17:31] Gin**
You're the one who doesn't get it.
**[17:33] Gin**
An idol's enemy isn't just in front of her.
**[17:38] Tae**
Yikes, what's with that line?
**[17:41] Sac**
It's an idol meet-and-greet, apparently.
**[17:43] Bo**
Ew, gross.
**[17:45] Com**
That's...
**[17:49] Com**
A rear ambush by the backing band!
**[17:53] Tae**
So what if they can shake hands with idols?
Does that really make them happy?
**[17:57] Tae**
Why are they so desperate?
**[17:59] Sac**
You're so silly, Otae.
**[18:01] Sac**
Look at them. They've probably never
held a girl's hand in their lives.
**[18:04] Sac**
Oh, sorry. They've probably
never talked to one, either.
**[18:06] Com**
The backing band unit's barrage of insults
**[18:09] Com**
is making the fans lose all desire
to attend the meet-and-greet!
**[18:12] G**
Rude! I have at least talked to girls!
**[18:14] Tae**
I bet it just went like, "Would
you like that heated?" and "Sure."
**[18:18] G**
There was more! Like,
"I don't need a plastic bag."
**[18:21] Sac**
You don't call that talking to a girl.
**[18:23] Bi**
That's cheating! Do you really
think you can mess with our line?
**[18:27] Gin**
Keep talking. Plotting evil from behind
the idol is what a backing band does.
**[18:32] Tae**
Don't they know that lining up
here won't resolve a thing?
**[18:37] Sac**
They're basically lining up to
climb the 13 stairs to the gallows.
**[18:42] Com**
Corpses everywhere!
**[18:43] Com**
They're massacring the fans in Galaxy
Kingdom Bitches 48's line one after another!
**[18:48] Bi**
Such futile resistance.
**[18:49] Bi**
Your sabotaging is only making the
fans distance themselves from you.
**[18:57] Bi**
*What?*
**[18:57] Kyu**
You went too far, Tae-chan, Sarutobi.
**[19:00] Bi**
* They had a Plan B with more backing*
* band members at the back?*
**[19:04] Tsu**
Sorry. Are you all right?
**[19:07] Tsu**
Can you stand?
**[19:08] Bi**
* Don't tell me, the first two backing*
* band members were just a setup?*
**[19:12] Tsu**
Forgive them.
**[19:14] Tsu**
They mean no harm. They're just a little shy.
**[19:17] Bi**
* By mercilessly beating down the*
* fans and then picking them up...*
**[19:20] Tsu**
They wanted to talk to you all, but it
seems they didn't know where to begin.
**[19:25] Tsu**
After all, it's the same for us.
**[19:28] Kyu**
W-We've never held a meet-and-greet...
**[19:31] Tsu**
...before today.
**[19:34] Tae**
Sorry.
**[19:35] Sac**
In truth, we're the same as you.
**[19:39] Tae**
If you don't mind...
**[19:42] All**
...could you take our first time?
**[19:46] Bi**
*They brought out the tsundere act?!*
**[19:48] C**
Hey, why did my heart just skip a beat?
**[19:51] C**
The girls over there are pretty cute, too!
**[19:53] C**
I think I'll head over there!
**[19:54] C**
Me, too!
**[19:55] C**
Me three!
**[19:56] Com**
Whoa, Galaxy Kingdom Bitches
48's line is falling apart!
**[20:01] Gin**
You were right. Nobodies could never
beat the greatest idols in the universe.
**[20:07] Gin**
But it looks like this battle
**[20:09] Gin**
is neither to determine the greatest
idols alive nor a public execution.
**[20:15] Gin**
I hear it's just a battle to
determine the biggest sluts alive.
**[20:18] Gin**
You're the ones who started playing dirty.
**[20:22] Gin**
We'll make you regret it!
**[20:27] Bi**
Wh-What're those?
**[20:29] Gin**
Even if we can't win as idols,
**[20:32] Gin**
Booger Diamonds 48 is invincible
in a battle of the sluts.
**[20:38] Com**
Those are... toilet stalls!
**[20:40] Com**
Are they using toilet stalls, of all things,
to compete with the bewitching curtains?
**[20:46] Bi**
H-How vulgar.
**[20:49] Bi**
A meet-and-greet in such a disgusting
place would never make the fans happy.
**[20:52] G**
Wh-What's with the toilets?
**[20:54] G**
Don't tell me, we'll get to see them
doing all sorts of dirty things?
**[20:59] G**
No way, man.
**[21:00] G**
But they're toilets.
**[21:01] Com**
Oh, dear! The fans are beset by confusion!
**[21:07] Kag**
Hey, Gin-chan! What's the meaning of this?
**[21:10] Tae**
This is the first I'm hearing of a
meet-and-greet in toilets, Shin-chan.
**[21:12] Shin**
I-It's not what you think, Sis!
**[21:14] Com**
The fans aren't the only ones confused!
**[21:17] Gin**
You know... This is the first
meet-and-greet for you guys, too.
**[21:20] Gin**
You're probably feeling
too shy to face the fans.
**[21:23] Gin**
That's where these come in.
Enter the stalls from beneath the toilets.
**[21:28] Gin**
Just stick your hands out and wait.
**[21:31] Gin**
That way, you can deal with any
kind of embarrassment just fine.
**[21:34] Gin**
All you have to do after
that is shake everything.
**[21:37] Gin**
You won't see a thing, but it's simple.
**[21:39] Gin**
Just grab everything that's
held out in front of you.
**[21:41] Gin**
Consider your hand nothing but toilet paper.
**[21:43] Tae**
What perverted acts are you
trying to make us perform?!
**[21:46] G**
You hear that?
**[21:48] G**
I'm going over there!
**[21:51] Com**
Wow! Even more people are leaving
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48's line!
**[21:56] Com**
Producer Sakata is stealing even more
fans with a terrifying slut plan!
**[22:01] Bi**
You shitheads!
**[22:03] Gin**
This is where things get real.
**[22:05] Gin**
Let's do this. Show them what
real sluts are capable of!
**[22:09] All**
Who're you calling sluts?!
**[22:11] Gin**
Ger-bleaurgh!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:44] Tsu**
Everyone... Thank you so,
so much for everything.
**[23:49] Tsu**
Next time: "An Idol's Badge of Honor."
***SIGN*** An Idol's Badge of Honor
***SIGN*** Shocked and hurt, Otsu holes up.
***SIGN*** Will she end up retiring like this?
***SIGN*** In this idol battle without honor and humanity,
***SIGN*** who will stand victorious in the end?
# 339 - An Idol's Badge of Honor
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** An Idol's Badge of Honor
**[01:39] [SONG] Sign**
Oedo Dome
**[01:43] Tsuk**
To hell with that. Even a normal
meet-and-greet doesn't sit right with me.
**[01:43] [SONG] Warning**
BDZ48's Request!! Watch this program in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV ♥
**[01:47] Tsuk**
If you're holding a toilet meet-and-greet,
they might as well all work at Yoshiwara.
**[01:51] Shin**
Is that really the issue here, Tsukuyo-san?
**[01:52] Sac**
No need to tell me. I've always
been the producer's cum dumpster.
**[01:55] Shin**
You keep your mouth shut!
**[01:56] Kyu**
Idol or not, as a samurai, I could
never grab something so filthy.
**[02:00] Kyu**
The only things a samurai should grab
are swords, dirt on powerful people,
**[02:03] Kyu**
control of the Yagyu Family and
the right to its inheritance,
**[02:06] Kyu**
stocks, and rice balls.
**[02:07] Shin**
Don't make rice balls with a hand that
touched all that filth, you celeb samurai!
**[02:10] Tae**
Besides, shaking hands from a
toilet would be rude to the fans.
**[02:14] Tae**
We want to treat our fans better.
**[02:17] Tae**
On that note,
**[02:19] Tae**
let's have the fans enter the toilet instead.
**[02:21] Shin**
Treat your fans better!
**[02:23] Tae**
Also, keeping hygiene in mind,
**[02:25] Tae**
they can hold Clift's fate in their hands.
***SIGN*** A Mad Hand Appeared
**[02:29] Shin**
Don't treat fans like the Mad Hands in DQ!
**[02:31] Shin**
And don't pull on Clift's leg! Quit pulling
our leg by being so useless, Clift!
**[02:33] Tae**
And despite everything that happened,
**[02:36] Tae**
let's flush it all away and
call it water under the bridge.
**[02:37] Shin**
They won't get flushed!
**[02:38] Shin**
Not even the large option will flush your
evil deeds and Clift's feelings away!
**[02:41] Tae**
It's the same principle
as the *Gintama* movies.
**[02:44] Tae**
The moment we get the fans
inside, we've already won.
**[02:46] Tae**
After that, the money will flow in even
if the movie's a steady stream of shit.
**[02:50] Shin**
Enough with the outrageous statements!
**[02:52] Shin**
Don't put us in the same boat
as your rip-off cabaret club!
**[02:55] G**
H-Hey, what happened in there?
**[02:57] G**
Uh, I think...
**[02:58] G**
I touched something soft
that starts with "cli."
**[03:02] G**
"Cli"? Something soft?!
**[03:03] G**
And then water came bursting out...
**[03:06] G**
Holy water came bursting out?!
**[03:08] G**
I-I'm lining up for Otae-chan!
**[03:11] G**
She seems prim and proper, but is
actually really bold! She's the best!
**[03:14] Shin**
By some miracle, it caused a
misunderstanding and formed a line!
**[03:17] Tae**
There, there.
**[03:18] Tae**
Don't rush, guys. Enter
the toilet in turn, okay?
**[03:21] Kag**
Well, since a line's formed,
let's just go with it.
**[03:24] Sac**
Pfft! Don't make me laugh!
**[03:26] Sac**
What part of that woman is soft?
**[03:30] Sac**
As you can see, she's a legendary Bigfoot
whose entire body is the Rockies!
**[03:36] Tae**
Sacchan...
**[03:37] Tae**
Could you not get all jealous because
nobody's coming to your toilet?
**[03:41] Tae**
Be a good little monkey and ride
on someone else's back, would you?
**[03:44] Sac**
Otae...
**[03:46] Sac**
A monkey on the back is an idiom that means
having a problem, not a literal monkey.
**[03:51] Sac**
Has your brain turned into a rock, too?
**[03:53] Kag**
Hey! Boss lady, Sacchan!
**[03:55] Tae**
And I'm saying you can ride
these filthy men bareback.
**[03:59] Sac**
Did you hear that, guys?
This is what Otae's really like!
**[04:02] Shin**
Who the hell are you two fighting?!
**[04:04] Sac**
What are you saying?
**[04:05] Sac**
Before being a battle to decide the top idol,
**[04:08] Sac**
this is a vote-off between
Diamond Vacuum members!
**[04:10] Shin**
Who the hell cares about that?!
**[04:11] Sac**
I won't let anyone else be center.
**[04:13] Sac**
You guys are better off lining up
for me instead of this Jezebel.
**[04:17] Sac**
Hey, don't you want to meet-and-greet me?
**[04:20] Sac**
I've got two much softer
things than she does.
**[04:22] Sac**
Look right here.
**[04:26] G**
On second thought, I'm going for Sacchan!
**[04:27] G**
She may wear glasses, but she's got
a bombshell body! She's the best!
**[04:31] Tae**
Why, you little bitch!
**[04:35] Sac**
I'm gonna be the center!
**[04:36] Sac**
You can spew all the holy water
you want in the wagon, Clift!
**[04:42] Sac**
No... You need to hold me more gently.
**[04:44] Shin**
Hey! What the hell are you guys doing?!
**[04:46] Sac**
If you shake that hard,
you'll crush my two
**[04:50] Sac**
soft balls!
**[04:53] Tae**
They're just Brey's golden orbs!
**[04:55] Shin**
What the hell are you doing?!
**[04:57] Shin**
This has turned into a meet-and-greet
for DQ48's wagon members!
**[05:00] Shin**
Where'd you even find them?!
**[05:02] Tae**
Clift and Brey needed to get rid of
their worries before the final battle!
**[05:06] Shin**
You two are Booger Diamonds
48's Clift and Brey!
**[05:11] Gin**
Exactly.
**[05:12] Gin**
Good job, Clift, Brey.
**[05:16] Gin**
Consider DQ48's Alena and McRyan.
**[05:18] Gin**
Do you know why most people pick
Alena out of these two fighters?
**[05:23] Gin**
That's because unlike McRyan, who is all
alone, Alena has Clift and Brey with her.
**[05:28] Shin**
No way!
**[05:29] Gin**
Yes way. They're just
like an idol group, too.
**[05:32] Gin**
The center Alena's star shines brighter
**[05:35] Gin**
amidst the darkness that is Clift and Brey.
**[05:38] Gin**
Which means...
**[05:39] G**
On second thought, Kyubei-chan's the best!
**[05:41] G**
Unlike those two sluts, she's a pure tomboy!
**[05:44] G**
Plus, she's got eyepatch and twin tails moe!
**[05:46] G**
Orthodox really is best!
**[05:50] Gin**
Go, Alena!
**[05:52] Gin**
Walk over the corpses of Clift and Brey!
**[06:00] Gin**
*I forgot Alena could spam critical hits.*
**[06:05] Kyu**
Don't touch me!
**[06:07] Kag**
Turns out Alena has the
biggest, Psaro-tier darkness.
**[06:10] Shin**
You've gotta be kidding me!
What did she even come here for?!
**[06:14] Kyu**
G-Give me some time.
**[06:16] Kyu**
I'm slowly getting used to it.
**[06:17] Kyu**
I think I'll be able to overcome it
once I throw another 1,500 of them.
**[06:20] Shin**
The fans won't recover from that!
**[06:22] Tae**
Then why don't you throw Clift 1,500 times?
**[06:25] Sac**
And Brey, too.
**[06:26] Shin**
Don't listen to those dark voices!
**[06:28] Shin**
Spare Clift and Brey already!
**[06:30] Tsuk**
Stop it, Kyubei.
**[06:32] Tsuk**
Don't push yourself.
**[06:33] Kyu**
Tsukuyo-dono?
**[06:34] Tsuk**
If you can't hold hands with men,
then I can just hold your share as well.
**[06:40] Kyu**
But I can't place such a burden on you.
**[06:43] Tsuk**
Don't worry. I cast aside my femininity,
but ah'm still a woman of Yoshiwara.
**[06:48] Tsuk**
Ah'm prepared to bear the sins of man.
**[06:51] Kyu**
Ah'm moe!
**[06:53] Gin**
Why are *you* freaking out over her?!
**[06:54] Shin**
We still had our ultimate weapon, the
female hero who backs up Alena's party!
**[06:59] G**
She looks like a cool, aloof beauty,
but she's kind enough to look out for others!
**[07:03] G**
Tsukuyo-chan is the best!
**[07:05] Shin**
This is our chance!
**[07:06] Tae**
My, aren't we popular, Tsukuyo-san.
**[07:09] Shin**
You two get back in the wagon right now!
**[07:11] Sac**
After that popularity poll, you want to
win the Diamond Vacuum vote-off, too?
**[07:11] [SONG] Sign**
Popularity Poll Arc (Episodes 182 - 184) November 2009
**[07:15] Sac**
Of course a Yoshiwara woman would
know all about the casting couch.
**[07:18] Shin**
You still haven't gotten over
what happened eight years ago?!
**[07:21] Sac**
But the center always has
the spotlight on her.
**[07:26] Sac**
So as fellow members, we really need
you to be more careful about things.
***SIGN*** Female Hero Sends Clift to the Wagon!!
***SIGN*** The Two Disappear Into the Wagon\Where Brey Awaits...
**[07:30] Shin**
What kinda scandal is that?!
**[07:31] Shin**
And why are you guys fabricating
stories to bring down your bandmate?!
**[07:35] Sac**
How will you take responsibility for this?
**[07:37] Tae**
Sending you to the Hakata wagon won't
be enough. You'll be sent to Indonesia!
**[07:41] Shin**
Your shitty organization
doesn't exist in Indonesia!
**[07:45] Tsuk**
I don't recall any of that,
**[07:46] Tsuk**
but I guess it's okay if it'll
get me out of this stupid mess.
**[07:50] Shin**
It had zero effect on her!
**[07:51] Sac**
That laid-back attitude of
yours is really annoying!
**[07:54] Sac**
Want me to cast Thwack on you?!
**[07:55] Sac**
Be honest! You want to be center too, right?
**[07:57] Tsuk**
Look, if you wanna play center
field or whatever base in baseball,
**[08:01] Tsuk**
first get nine people to play with!
**[08:03] Sac**
Don't play dumb with me!
**[08:04] Shin**
Knock it off! Your ugly infighting
is weirding out the fans!
**[08:07] Tae**
Oh, wait!
**[08:08] Sac**
We were kidding! That was
just a comedy opening act!
**[08:11] Sac**
Come back!
**[08:16] Com**
Uh, excuse me. Can I just, like,
**[08:19] Com**
take a dump?
**[08:26] Com**
Whoa! It's totally sticking out!
**[08:28] Shin**
We don't need play-by-play for that!
**[08:30] Com**
My poop is as loose and sloppy as
Booger Diamonds 48's morals!
**[08:33] Com**
Their behavior sticks out
so much in the idol sphere,
**[08:36] Com**
both the fans and my poop
scattered all over the place!
**[08:38] Shin**
Quit telling us about how your dump is going!
**[08:40] Com**
Meanwhile, Galaxy Kingdom Bitches
48 are nearly in four digits!
**[08:46] Com**
There's no telling what's going on
behind those bewitching curtains,
**[08:50] Com**
but the fans are being rendered
spineless one after another!
**[08:53] Bit**
It's all over, Booger Diamonds 48.
**[08:58] Gin**
Guess we'll have to do something about
their mystery meet-and-greet after all.
**[09:02] Shin**
Not yet.
**[09:04] Shin**
Booger Diamonds 48 isn't finished yet.
**[09:09] Shin**
Terakado Tsu isn't finished yet!
**[09:12] Shin**
Not as long as the captain
of the Terakado Tsu Fanclub,
**[09:15] Shin**
Shimura Shinpachi, is still here.
**[09:17] Shin**
I'll stop them.
**[09:20] Shin**
So Kagura-chan, Otsu-chan,
the rest is in your hands.
**[09:27] Bit**
Captain of the Terakado Tsu
Fanclub, Shimura Shinpachi.
**[09:31] Bit**
Do you really want a taste
of our meet-and-greet?
**[09:35] Bit**
Did you forget what happened to
your friends when they tried us?
**[09:41] Shin**
Otsu-chan...
**[09:43] Shin**
As long as you keep singing,
**[09:45] Shin**
your fans won't go anywhere.
**[09:48] Shin**
Even back when you didn't have any fans,
**[09:50] Shin**
you still had fun singing on the roadsise.
**[09:55] Shin**
Someone who was given strength
by watching you is still here.
**[10:01] Shin**
Just as your voice has cheered
us on when we were sad and hurt,
**[10:07] Shin**
there's a fan still here who will cheer
you on when you are sad and hurt.
**[10:13] Shin**
If you've lost everything, you can
just start over from that spot.
**[10:18] Shin**
If you'll sing, I'll gladly come
see you there again and again...
**[10:22] Shin**
At that concert hall for just the two of us.
**[10:26] Shin**
No matter what happens,
**[10:28] Shin**
I will be Terakado Tsu's first and last fan.
**[10:31] Bit**
How amusing.
**[10:33] Bit**
By getting through our meet-and-greet,
**[10:36] Bit**
you want to stir up the undecided
fans and that cowardly girl?
**[10:40] Bit**
Well, let's see you try.
**[10:42] Bit**
Just like you wanted, we'll make
you Terakado Tsu's last ever fan
**[10:46] Bit**
by enslaving your heart!
**[10:48] Shin**
Right back at you.
**[10:50] Shin**
I'm Shimura Shinpachi, captain
of the Terakado Tsu Fanclub.
**[10:53] Shin**
Here I come!
**[10:54] Gin**
Sh-Shinpachi!
**[10:59] Gin**
That was quick!
**[11:00] Gin**
What's wrong with you? After all that
big talk, you got destroyed in a flash!
**[11:03] Gin**
You got stripped to your underwear
at an incredible speed!
**[11:07] Bit**
Even her oldest fan and white knight
is just a rotten virgin nerd.
**[11:11] Bit**
Our meet-and-greet can entrance anyone in
one shot, no matter whose fan they are.
**[11:15] Bit**
Now, Terakado Tsu has
not a single fan left...
**[11:17] Shin**
Once I get home, I'm gonna
throw away all my porn mags.
**[11:22] Shin**
But as for Otsu-chan's CDs,
**[11:25] Shin**
I won't throw a single one away.
**[11:28] Bit**
*My antenna? Did he...*
**[11:32] Com**
Wow, Shimaru has made a successful return!
**[11:37] Com**
And what's going on here?
**[11:39] Com**
Miss Bitchie is suddenly writhing in pain!
**[11:42] Shin**
I thought it was strange how one handshake
**[11:46] Shin**
could turn anyone into a Galaxy
Kingdom Bitches 48 fanatic.
**[11:49] Shin**
Selling dreams is your job?
**[11:51] Shin**
That's not it.
**[11:56] Shin**
What you were showing them was just an
illusion, Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48!
**[12:02] Bit**
C-Curse you!
**[12:04] Com**
Having lost her antenna, Miss Bitchie
has turned into a different person!
**[12:08] Com**
Th-That's not all! From behind
the bewitching curtains,
**[12:11] Com**
unfamiliar uggo idols are
tumbling out one after another!
**[12:14] Taka**
Shin-chan's right.
**[12:17] Taka**
Fans of any other idol would've been fine,
**[12:20] Taka**
but you ran out of luck when
you picked a fight with us.
**[12:23] Taka**
Your brainwashing won't work on us.
**[12:26] Taka**
Because...
**[12:27] Taka**
We're the universe's greatest fans
of the universe's greatest idol!
**[12:30] Taka**
Because we're the Terakado
Tsu Fanclub, dynamite!
**[12:34] Shin**
Taka-chin! Guys!
**[12:36] Com**
C-Can you believe it? The Terakado
Tsu Fanclub is back in action!
**[12:41] Com**
With their sheer love for Otsu-chan, they
exposed the brainwashing shenanigans!
**[12:47] G**
No way!
**[12:48] G**
Our number one idols in the universe!
**[12:50] G**
The shocking truth is making the
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches fans waver!
**[12:54] G**
Wait, the count went down to zero!
**[12:57] G**
It has been deemed invalid
due to brainwashing!
**[13:00] G**
Booger Diamonds 48 have pulled off
an miraculous last-ditch comeback!
**[13:04] G**
Let it be heard across the universe, men.
**[13:07] G**
Who the universe's greatest idol with
the universe's greatest fans is.
**[13:14] G**
Booger Diamonds 48 Fanclub, let's go!
**[13:18] G**
L-O-V-E Otsu!
**[13:21] All**
L-O-V-E Otsu!
**[13:24] Shin**
L-O-V-E Kagura!
**[13:27] All**
L-O-V-E Kagura!
**[13:28] G**
Let's go cheer them on, too.
**[13:30] Com**
The fanclub's Booger Diamonds 48
chant echoes across the arena.
**[13:35] Com**
Their overwhelming passion
**[13:37] Com**
is infecting the now recovered
Galaxy Kingdom Bitches fans!
**[13:43] Com**
Wh-What's this noise?!
**[13:49] Bit**
How dare you expose an idol's hidden
face, that which mustn't be seen!
**[13:54] Bit**
Mysterious sound waves are being emitted
by all of Galaxy Kingdom Bitches 48.
**[14:00] Bit**
If you found out, all we have to
do is brainwash you all once again.
**[14:05] Bit**
Keep dancing within the fantasies that
are idols for the rest of your lives...
**[14:10] Bit**
That's...
**[14:14] Kag**
Looks like this is the kind
of handshake you need.
**[14:19] Com**
Booger Diamonds 48's Kagura
stops Miss Bitchie!
**[14:24] Com**
In these final stages, she's turning
it into an actual fight of hands!
**[14:27] Com**
What are you morons doing?
Hurry up and brainwash...
**[14:32] GKB**
What's this awful noise?
**[14:34] Tae**
The time has come to show you
the fruits of our training.
**[14:38] Com**
Th-That's...
**[14:39] Tae**
Kagura-chan, leave the backing to us!
**[14:42] Sac**
Go grab idol stardom with your hands!
**[14:44] Com**
It's the backing band!
**[14:46] Com**
Diamond Vacuum's overwriting the mystery
sound waves with terrifying dissonance!
**[14:52] Com**
Suffering fans,
**[14:52] Com**
screaming fanclub,
**[14:54] Com**
and groaning backing band.
**[14:55] Com**
All of their fates now rest
in the hands of those two!
**[14:59] Com**
Is this really a meet-and-greet?
**[15:02] Com**
No, this is a battle with their idol careers
on the line! A real meet-and-beat!
**[15:07] Bit**
Do you really think you
have the right to stop us?
**[15:11] Bit**
Showing illusions and brainwashing
is something all idols do.
**[15:15] Bit**
Beneath the surface, idols
are filthy people, too.
**[15:18] Bit**
They hide that filth with cosmetic
surgery and show off their fake beauty.
**[15:23] Bit**
They hide that filth by putting on an
act and showing off their fake purity.
**[15:28] Bit**
The dreams you people are having are
nothing but illusions wrapped in lies!
**[15:33] Bit**
All we did was perfect those illusions
and make them more beautiful!
**[15:38] Bit**
And we did it to show you the
dreams that *you* wanted to see!
**[15:42] Gin**
You can't call those dreams.
**[15:47] Gin**
It's just giving up.
**[15:49] Gin**
Sure, idols dig their nostrils,
take dumps, and have ***, too.
**[15:55] Gin**
They cause scandals at times and
get down in the dumps at others.
**[15:59] Gin**
But to make their pathetic selves
stand proud in the spotlight,
**[16:04] Gin**
they discipline themselves, strive to
improve, and struggle to stand on stage.
**[16:09] Gin**
You laugh that off as a mere illusion?
**[16:12] Gin**
Well, you're wrong.
**[16:15] Gin**
That's not an illusion. It's an ideal.
**[16:19] Gin**
The dream to crawl toward one's ideal.
**[16:23] Gin**
That's what idols are all about.
**[16:25] Gin**
Just like samurai,
**[16:28] Gin**
they're seekers of the ultimate dream.
**[16:32] Tsu**
Sorry to keep you waiting, menthol.
**[16:36] Gin**
And what those morons are having
**[16:39] Gin**
is a real dream they're
pursuing with their idols.
**[16:42] Bit**
I-It can't be. Why is she here?
**[16:45] Kag**
Idols really are best in a group.
**[16:49] Kag**
Our diamond is shining
especially bright right now,
**[16:52] Kag**
thanks to us massive boogers.
**[16:56] Bit**
*Did they believe that she would come here?*
**[17:00] Bit**
* Were we—no, was this entire*
* event and its ugly battles—*
**[17:06] Bit**
* just a massive booger to make the*
* diamond called Otsu shine brighter?!*
**[17:11] Bit**
You were using us all along?!
**[17:13] Tsu**
Kagura-chan! Guys!
**[17:16] Kag**
Otsu.
**[17:17] Kag**
It wasn't for long, but I had
fun being an idol with you.
**[17:22] Kag**
Let them hear it... Our
Booger Diamonds 48's song.
**[17:27] Kag**
The song of real idols, which can blow
away all illusions and brainwashing!
**[17:31] Bit**
Y-You little!
**[17:34] Kag**
Guys! Don't let some illusion control you!
**[17:38] Kag**
Take back your dreams!
**[17:41] Kag**
Listen to our song!
**[17:43] Kag**
And...
**[17:44] Kag**
Even if you hate Booger Diamonds 48,
**[17:48] Kag**
please don't come to hate Terakado Tsu!
**[18:01] Tsu**
Please lend me your ears.
**[18:02] Tsu**
Fellow members who have walked with me,
**[18:05] Tsu**
fans who have cheered me on,
**[18:07] Tsu**
and rivals who have competed with me.
**[18:11] Tsu**
All of you have been my pillar of support.
**[18:15] Tsu**
You are all part of Booger Diamonds 48,
and I dedicate this song to you.
**[18:19] Tsu**
This is *An Idol's Badge of Honor.*
**[18:21] [SONG] Song**
La la la, idol
**[18:27] [SONG] Song**
La la la, idol
**[18:33] [SONG] Song**
Accel, consul, it's dreams that we sell
**[18:39] [SONG] Song**
Idol, idol, idling
**[18:42] [SONG] Song**
Even on the edge, we've got the handling
**[18:53] [SONG] Song**
That scandal back then
**[18:59] [SONG] Song**
Was a summer sentence
**[19:05] [SONG] Song**
I know it's do or die, yes
**[19:10] [SONG] Song**
I could end up doing pillow business
**[19:16] [SONG] Song**
Even that day of the month is safe and secure
**[19:22] [SONG] Song**
Scarlet, blood ruby, an idol's badge of honor
**[19:31] [SONG] Song**
La la la, idol
**[19:37] [SONG] Song**
La la la, idol
**[19:42] [SONG] Song**
Foot soldier, loot and plunder, pillow seller
**[19:48] [SONG] Song**
Idol, idol, idling
**[19:51] [SONG] Song**
We can't swerve around aging
**[19:57] [SONG] Sign**
Oedo Dome
**[20:04] Bit**
How ironic it is
**[20:05] Bit**
that the stage on which an idol
stands to give people dreams
**[20:09] Bit**
is built on the wrecks of
countless other dreams.
**[20:13] Bit**
But that's why she shines brightly,
like a lone star in the dark.
**[20:19] Bit**
She will walk over our dreams
and those of her friends
**[20:23] Bit**
and continue down this path
of chaos we call idol stardom.
**[20:28] Bit**
I don't know if you'll be able to
make up for what you've sacrificed.
**[20:32] Bit**
You just let go of a talent
that could surpass Otsu.
**[20:37] Bit**
She has the ruthlessness
to take down her enemies,
**[20:40] Bit**
and the selflessness to cast
herself aside to help her friends.
**[20:44] Bit**
A diamond covered in boogers,
with two totally contrasting faces.
**[20:47] Shin**
Gin-san, Kagura-chan!
**[20:49] Shin**
Wait a second. Aren't you gonna watch?
**[20:49] OMom**
Yeah. I asked her if she
would like to keep at it,
**[20:53] Gin**
Damn it, I couldn't make any money again.
**[20:54] OMom**
but she refused, saying she was
already part of an idol group.
**[20:58] OMom**
It's too bad, but she's fine that way.
**[21:02] OMom**
I mean, she shines brightest
in that group of three.
**[21:10] Song**
Beyond all the cigarettes,
alcohol, and shaved heads,
**[21:16] Song**
the one who filled me
with passion again was...
**[21:18] [SONG] Song**
It was you, you, you
**[21:28] Tsu**
Thenk you.
**[22:58] [SONG] TV**
Knock it off already
**[23:03] G**
Otsu-chan really is cute.
**[23:06] G**
But there's something off about her lately.
**[23:09] G**
Look at what she started doing,
even though she's an idol.
**[23:13] G**
Apparently, she was influenced by
an idol group she really loves.
**[23:18] G**
A group that disbanded right
after making its debut.
**[23:22] G**
What was it called, again?
**[23:23] Kag**
Booger Diamonds 48.
**[23:26] G**
That's it! The phantom idol
group, Booger Diamonds 48!
**[23:33] Kag**
It's no phantom.
**[23:35] Kag**
It remains in my heart
**[23:39] Kag**
as the idol group of dreams!
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:45] Tama**
Just to let you know in advance,
**[23:47] Tama**
this isn't a sales promotion
for our upcoming game.
***SIGN*** The Line Between Godlike Games and Shitty Games Is Paper-Thin
**[23:50] Tama**
We're just messing around.
***SIGN*** There you have it,
***SIGN*** so keep that in mind, all of you.
***SIGN*** Next time, we're again going with wave, wind,
***SIGN*** and standing all the way!
# 340 - The Line Between Godlike Games and Shitty Games Is Paper-Thin / Glasses Are a Part of the Soul
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
**[01:34] Gin**
*Gintama Rumble*?
**[01:36] Gin**
What the heck is this?
***SIGN*** Enjoy *Gintama Rumble* in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:38] Shin**
What do you mean? It's an upcoming game.
**[01:41] Shin**
Following the success of
the *Gintama* board game,
**[01:44] Shin**
Bandai Namco went all-out to
make another game adaptation.
**[01:47] Kag**
And it's an actual action game this time,
as you can tell from the "Rumble."
**[01:51] Kag**
It's got tons more money invested
in it than the board game.
**[01:53] Gin**
What's the point of making an action game
when we don't have any special moves?
**[01:58] Gin**
Talk about living in denial.
**[02:00] Gin**
At least it was kinda cute when they
made the board game in desperation.
**[02:03] Shin**
Hey, quit complaining.
**[02:04] Gin**
What's even going on with the rights?
Don't you think this is weird, Bamco?
***SIGN*** Sugar Content
**[02:08] Shin**
Our protagonist discussing our
game is weirder, if you ask me.
**[02:12] Gin**
True, we never really talked about it before.
**[02:14] Gin**
Regardless of who made games about
us or how badly they bombed,
**[02:19] Gin**
we pretended not to notice.
**[02:21] Shin**
Stop being rude, or we'll
never get another game!
**[02:24] Gin**
Besides, the licensed-game genre has
always been a hotbed of shitty games.
**[02:27] Shin**
They're not shitty! They're
made with love and affection!
**[02:30] Gin**
But if we don't produce a hit soon, sponsors
might give up on the whole franchise.
**[02:37] Gin**
That could lead to a reduction of
cross-media promotions and merch
**[02:40] Gin**
and ultimately affect even the anime.
**[02:42] Shin**
Uh, the anime isn't really one to talk.
**[02:45] Gin**
Talk about reckless, making an action game
while we weren't paying attention.
**[02:49] Gin**
It'll be in the bargain bin
within a few months, no doubt.
**[02:52] Shin**
Don't jinx it before the release!
It's gonna sell like hotcakes!
**[02:55] Gin**
I dunno about other Jump protags,
**[02:57] Gin**
but as an adult protag, I'm gonna
point out problems when I see them.
**[03:01] Shin**
You're the biggest problem here!
**[03:02] Shin**
I've never heard of a protag
meddling in his franchise's merch!
**[03:06] Gin**
I'm saying I can't just sit back
and let Bamco handle it all.
**[03:10] Gin**
In this day and age, any protag worth
his salt has to oversee all the merch.
**[03:15] Gin**
On that note...
***SIGN*** The Line Between Godlike Games
and Shitty Games Is Paper-Thin
***SIGN*** Bandai Namco
***SIGN*** Lab A
**[03:25] Tama**
Main system successfully infiltrated.
***SIGN*** Authenticating
**[03:29] [SONG] Sign**
Unlocked
**[03:31] Tama**
Hacking complete.
**[03:33] Gin**
Great. Let's fix up *Gintama
Rumble* by ourselves.
**[03:37] Shin**
Hey! What do you think you're
doing right before the release?!
**[03:39] Gin**
We're gonna do all we can to make a game
that has a chance of selling a million.
**[03:43] Shin**
Yeah, right!
**[03:44] Shin**
Do you really think we're gonna get away
with sneaking in here and doing whatever?
**[03:47] Shin**
They've almost finished
making a really fun game!
***SIGN*** Gintama Rumble
**[03:50] Shin**
People with no game dev experience
should keep their noses out of this!
**[03:52] Gin**
Don't be naïve.
**[03:55] Gin**
Sure, it might be a fun game.
**[03:57] Gin**
But I wanna ask Bamco this:
**[03:59] Gin**
"Do you guys really want to score a hit?"
***SIGN*** Gintama Rumble
**[04:02] Gin**
If they were serious about it,
***SIGN*** Gintama Rumble
**[04:06] Gin**
this is what would happen, obviously.
**[04:07] Shin**
Like hell!
**[04:08] Shin**
Don't try to claw your way
into a super-hit series!
**[04:10] Gin**
There's a ton of them already,
so nobody'll notice if we slip ourselves in.
**[04:13] Gin**
Can't go wrong Tales-of-ing
basically anything in life.
**[04:16] Shin**
What the hell is "Tales-of-ing"?
What kinda verb is that?
**[04:19] Gin**
Ignoring our crude original work is fine.
**[04:23] Gin**
We're totally up for
Tales-of-ing off of them.
**[04:26] Shin**
More like Tales of hitching
a ride on their backs!
**[04:29] Shin**
Talk about riding on
someone else's coattails!
**[04:31] Tama**
Roger.
**[04:33] Tama**
You want to be carried one way or another.
**[04:35] Shin**
Hey, Tama-san!
**[04:36] Tama**
So switching to a fantasy RPG, basically?
**[04:41] Shin**
Wait a sec! What about the "Rumble" part?
***SIGN*** Gintama Rumble
**[04:44] Shin**
That's the USP of this game, you know!
**[04:46] Kag**
That won't be hard to work around. We can
just name the protag Rumble or something.
**[04:50] Shin**
Who? This *will* be a *Gintama* game, right?
**[04:52] Gin**
Great idea. I really hate game
protags who talk too much.
**[04:58] Gin**
In order to provide the best immersion,
**[05:00] Gin**
he should say nothing but
"yes" and "no," like in DQ.
**[05:04] Gin**
So Gin-san doesn't have
to be the protag here.
**[05:07] Gin**
The protag has no personality,
only speaks when required,
***SIGN*** Tales of Rumble
**[05:10] Gin**
and his name is Tales of Rumble.
**[05:11] Shin**
But Rumble's dripping with personality!
**[05:13] Shin**
Even if he doesn't say a word,
his back tells the whole story!
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[05:16] [SONG] Sign**
Snack Otose
**[05:17] Gin**
Rumble comes to Edo, joins Odd Jobs,
**[05:20] Gin**
and rescues the kidnapped
princess with us, is the story.
**[05:23] Shin**
Who would self-insert
into this rugged old man?
**[05:26] Shin**
He's clearly the guy who
normally kidnaps the princess!
***SIGN*** Hello, Rumble. Welcome to Odd Jobs.
**[05:32] Gin**
Hello, Rumble. Welcome to Odd Jobs.
***SIGN*** Before you join, I'd like to know your affinity. Is that okay?
**[05:36] Gin**
Before you join, I'd like to know
your affinity. Is that okay?
***SIGN*** I'm S I'm M
**[05:43] Shin**
What happened to "yes" and "no"?!
**[05:45] Shin**
How many things could you
respond to with that?!
**[05:47] Gin**
All an RPG protag needs to
say is whether he's S or M.
**[05:52] Gin**
That'd let him choose his
size at the armor shop, too.
***SIGN*** Which size armor would you like?
***SIGN*** I'm M
**[05:56] Gin**
Rumble's L-sized, though.
**[05:58] Shin**
What's the point, then? The leather
armor would be too tight on him!
**[06:01] Gin**
Also, you recover HP at Starbecks, not
inns, giving the game a modern, hip feel.
**[06:07] Gin**
The options should come in handy there, too.
***SIGN*** Would you like that in short, tall, or grande?
**[06:12] Shin**
He can't order anything!
**[06:13] Shin**
The grande and stuff is too trendy
for him! He's freaking out!
**[06:16] Gin**
Don't worry. HP might be difficult,
**[06:19] Gin**
but buying rope and candles from the
item shop will let you recover MP.
***SIGN*** I'm M
**[06:23] Shin**
That's Masochist Points!
**[06:25] Shin**
Why is "M" the only choice
you can make in this game?!
**[06:27] Shin**
Hey! Who the hell would want
to control such a gross protag?
**[06:31] Gin**
Relax. It only looks so graphic
because this is a cinematic scene.
**[06:38] Gin**
Most of the time, he'll be super-deformed.
**[06:40] Shin**
The protag is practically a corpse?
**[06:42] Gin**
Games these days are too reliant on FMVs.
**[06:46] Gin**
Graphics only need to be
detailed in climactic scenes.
**[06:48] Gin**
The rest of the time, they should be
left up to the player's imagination.
***SIGN*** Shinpachi: "Big trouble, Gin-san!"
**[06:53] Shin**
What do you think you're
leaving to imagination?!
**[06:55] Shin**
What happened to the body? Are you saying
that's a waste of resources, too?!
***SIGN*** Someone kidnapped the princess.
**[06:59] Shin**
Hey! Why're the glasses
dragging a coffin around?!
**[07:01] Shin**
Does it mean what I think it means?!
**[07:03] Kag**
With that, we've got a full party.
**[07:05] Gin**
Yeah. The four of them will
now begin their adventure.
***SIGN*** Gintoki Kagura Rumble Shinpachi
**[07:10] Shin**
They've practically been wiped out from
the start! Hurry up and visit the church!
***SIGN*** A monster appeared.
**[07:15] Kag**
Look, an enemy.
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades (38) ATK DEF WORK
**[07:17] Shin**
Why is everyone, ally or enemy, a corpse?!
**[07:20] Shin**
Why is Hasegawa-san a monster?!
**[07:22] Gin**
That's not Hasegawa-san.
It's Rotten Shades (38).
**[07:25] Shin**
So Hasegawa-san, then!
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades calls for backup...
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades calls for backup... but no help arrives.
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades calls for backup...
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades calls for backup... but no help arrives.
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades calls for backup...
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades calls for backup... but no help arrives, obviously.
**[07:42] Shin**
Somebody help him!
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades is defeated.
**[07:47] Shin**
What did he even show up for?
All he's done is embarrass himself!
***SIGN*** Rotten Shades gets up and looks at you like he wants work. Will you give him a job?
**[07:53] Shin**
"He wants work"?
What's that supposed to mean?
**[07:55] Shin**
Wait, is he gonna join the party?
You can save the Rotten Shades?
***SIGN*** I'm S
**[08:00] Shin**
Somebody save him!
**[08:02] Shin**
I don't see a choice to
save Rotten Shades (38)!
**[08:06] Gin**
Games have gotten too indifferent
to killing and looting, right?
**[08:10] Gin**
You kill monsters for XP and open
chests in strangers' homes for items.
**[08:16] Gin**
By giving the players a
choice in this scenario,
**[08:19] Gin**
we want them to learn how much
people sin in everyday life.
**[08:22] Shin**
Can we really make kids play a game
where they finish off a half-dead guy?
**[08:26] Gin**
Our lives are being supported
by countless deaths.
**[08:29] Gin**
We wanna teach kids that through this game.
**[08:32] Gin**
So the more Rotten Shades you kill,
the more coffins you'll be dragging around.
**[08:36] Shin**
We don't need any more corpses!
**[08:39] Shin**
This is so depressing, it'll only
make people lose motivation to play!
***SIGN*** Gintoki Kagura Rumble Shinpachi
**[08:43] Kag**
We lost HP.
**[08:45] Kag**
What caused it?
***SIGN*** Gintoki Job: NEET
**[08:48] Gin**
Looks like I got infected by NEET in
the fight against the Rotten Shades.
**[08:52] Sign**
Why is NEET a poison-like status effect?
**[08:55] Gin**
It reduces the motivation stat to zero,
preventing the use of items or heals.
***SIGN*** ATK
DEF
MOT
WALK
**[09:00] Gin**
You also lose the energy to walk,
so HP is gradually lost.
**[09:04] Gin**
And eventually...
**[09:07] [SONG] Sign**
The party is wiped out.
**[09:09] Shin**
NEET is way too scary!
**[09:11] Gin**
Of course it is. Being a NEET is terrifying.
**[09:15] Gin**
You know how a lot of people are goofing
off after finishing their education lately?
**[09:19] Gin**
We want to show them how
important it is to work.
**[09:22] Shin**
But you're not. All you're showing
them is an absurd fear of NEETdom!
***SIGN*** Enquiries
**[09:26] Gin**
Don't worry. Those who are up for
the fight will get another chance.
***SIGN*** This is Hello Work. We can refer you to a workplace.
**[09:33] Shin**
What? You come back to life
at Hello Work, not a church?
**[09:36] Gin**
So long as you never give up,
you can start anew over and over.
***SIGN*** Choose your new job.
***SIGN*** S, please M, please
**[09:42] Shin**
Excuse me! In the end, S and M
are the only jobs I can take!
***SIGN*** Choose quickly.
***SIGN*** Choose quickly. Could you hurry up?
**[09:51] Gin**
Huh? The staff are acting weird.
***SIGN*** It doesn't matter which.
***SIGN*** It doesn't matter which. Come on...
***SIGN*** It doesn't matter which. Come on... Man... This is a pain.
**[10:01] [SONG] Sign**
Hello Work is wiped out.
**[10:02] Shin**
NEET is way too scary!
**[10:04] Shin**
Why has it infected the
Hello Work staff, too?!
**[10:08] Gin**
Sometimes, even Hello Work
people don't wanna work.
**[10:11] Gin**
I wanted to show the player that.
**[10:13] Shin**
Do you wanna make them work or not?
**[10:16] [SONG] Sign**
Edo is wiped out.
**[10:18] Gin**
At this point, all you can
do is reset and start over.
**[10:21] Shin**
Who was it that said you can start
anew so long as you don't give up?!
**[10:23] Gin**
Shaddup!
**[10:24] Gin**
You think you can auto-revive when
you're wiped out? Life ain't that easy!
**[10:29] Gin**
Those of us who grew up on *Wizardry*
**[10:31] Gin**
had to form another party to go recover
our bodies once we got wiped out.
**[10:36] Gin**
After all that trouble, we'd take
them to the temple to revive,
**[10:38] Gin**
but sometimes we'd fail and
lose our characters forever.
**[10:40] Shin**
Enough with your "back in my day" crap!
**[10:41] Shin**
There's no way modern kids could
deal with this masochistic design!
**[10:46] Kag**
That's it. Making them
reset is going too far.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[10:49] [SONG] Sign**
Snack Otose
**[10:49] Kag**
We can just make them form a
new party to save us NEETs.
***SIGN*** Welcome to Kabuki District, Rumblee.
**[10:55] Oto**
Welcome to Kabuki District, Rumblee.
**[10:58] Shin**
Rumblee?!
**[11:00] Kag**
Rumble had a kid sister.
**[11:02] Kag**
She's come to Kabuki District
in order to save him.
**[11:04] Shin**
I get it! Twin protags!
***SIGN*** I'm impressed by your resolve to save your NEET brother.
**[11:07] Oto**
I'm impressed by your resolve
to save your NEET brother.
***SIGN*** But this town is overrun with NEET now.
**[11:12] Oto**
But this town is overrun with NEET now.
***SIGN*** Rumblee,
**[11:16] Oto**
Rumblee, can you really...
***SIGN*** Rumblee, can you really...
***SIGN*** save your brother?!
**[11:20] Oto**
save your brother?!
***SIGN*** MADAO Hazard
**[11:30] Voice**
MADAO Hazard.
**[11:33] Shin**
It turned into a completely different game!
**[11:36] Kag**
Act Two, Tales of Madao Hazard,
**[11:39] Kag**
is a survival-horror game set in a
Kabuki District taken over by NEETs.
**[11:45] Shin**
Why have NEETs turned into
a resident evil biohazard?!
**[11:50] Kag**
The player must cut through
wave after wave of NEETs.
**[11:53] Shin**
What happened to the girl who
came here to save a NEET?!
**[11:56] Kag**
The objective is to reach NEET Rumble!
**[12:01] Shin**
Rumble's totally become the last boss!
***SIGN*** Oh, no. Shinpachi's been completely consumed.
**[12:06] Shin**
What do you mean, "consumed"?
Just how terrifying is the NEET virus?
***SIGN*** Shinpachi... Rumble...
**[12:11] Kag**
Shinpachi... Rumble...
***SIGN*** Don't give up! There must be a way to make them work!
**[12:13] Gin**
Don't give up!
**[12:15] Gin**
There must be a way to make them work!
**[12:18] Shin**
How come you two get to be Rumblee's
party members and I don't?!
***SIGN*** Fire that thing into their asses. It'll send them flying all the way to Hello Work.
**[12:26] Mad**
Fire that thing into their asses.
**[12:29] Mad**
It'll send them flying all
the way to Hello Work.
**[12:31] Shin**
Hey! Why's the NEET who caused all this
showing up now like he's here to help?!
***SIGN*** However, there's only one work slot open.
**[12:36] Mad**
However, there's only one work slot open.
***SIGN*** Unfortunately, one of the two will be erased along with the NEET virus.
**[12:39] Mad**
Unfortunately, one of the two will
be erased along with the NEET virus.
**[12:43] Shin**
Say what?!
***SIGN*** Press A for Shinpachi-kun. Press B for Rumble.
**[12:45] Mad**
Press A for Shinpachi-kun.
Press B for Rumble.
***SIGN*** Press A for Shinpachi-kun. Press B for Rumble. Now, choose one!
**[12:49] Mad**
Now, choose one!
**[12:51] Shin**
H-How are you supposed to choose—
***SIGN*** I'm S
**[12:59] Shin**
You too?!
**[13:01] Shin**
In the end, all three NEETs got wiped out!
**[13:04] Shin**
Can both siblings only speak in S and Ms?!
**[13:06] Shin**
How the hell were they raised?!
**[13:09] Kag**
There you have it.
**[13:11] Gin**
Pretty good.
**[13:13] Shin**
Like hell it is!
**[13:14] Shin**
This game has nothing to do
with even the G of *Gintama*!
**[13:17] Shin**
And what happened to the stuff about
the kidnapped princess, anyway?!
**[13:20] Gin**
The princess doesn't exist anymore.
Everyone turned into a NEET.
**[13:24] Shin**
Just how half-assed is this story?!
**[13:28] Tama**
Shinpachi-sama...
**[13:29] Tama**
The kidnapped princess, and the
slain Rumble and friends...
**[13:33] Tama**
There's one way to recover them all.
**[13:36] Shin**
Really, Tama-san?
**[13:38] Tama**
The princess is fine.
**[13:40] Tama**
Funnily enough, she escaped the NEET
outbreak because she was kidnapped.
**[13:45] Tama**
She was being held captive
by terrifying monsters
**[13:48] Tama**
in a world where no living
person can ever set foot.
**[13:58] Shin**
D-Don't tell me...
**[14:00] Tama**
Yes. In order to gain tickets to
the afterlife and save the princess,
**[14:06] Tama**
Rumble and gang risked their lives
and separated their bodies and souls.
**[14:10] Tama**
Their new forms showed no traces
of the time they spent as MADAOs.
**[14:16] Tama**
History would come to know them as...
***SIGN*** Super MADAO Brothers
**[14:22] Shin**
Forget recovering anything!
It just made an even bigger mess!
**[14:25] Shin**
Are you seriously going to start
a third act at this point?
**[14:28] Shin**
How many coattails are you
people gonna crap on?!
**[14:31] Tama**
But they've found work as plumbers now,
and the princess will be rescued, too.
**[14:36] Tama**
Everyone will be saved.
**[14:37] Shin**
Not Bamco!
**[14:39] Gin**
Okay, fine. We'll move on to a guy named
Bamco Lord van Damme as the protag and—
**[14:43] Shin**
Enough!
**[14:47] G**
So we can either go with something like
this or the action game showed before.
***SIGN*** Gintama Rumble Pitch
**[14:53] G**
Which should we release, President?
**[14:59] [SONG] Sign**
Bandai Namco
**[14:59] Prez**
I'm S!
**[15:11] Tae**
Take care.
**[15:27] Shin**
*Uh, something seems off.*
***SIGN*** Glasses Are a Part of the Soul
***SIGN*** Zoff's Eyewear
**[15:39] Zo**
So, what kind of glasses are you looking for?
**[15:43] Zo**
Normal ones like these.
**[15:45] Zo**
I broke them while half-asleep.
**[15:48] Zo**
All the trendy stores are too expen—wait,
don't take it the wrong way!
**[15:52] Zo**
It's fine. We place more importance
on visibility than appearance.
**[16:00] Zo**
Glasses take the place of their
wearer's eyes to see things.
**[16:04] Zo**
They're a second pair of eyes.
**[16:09] Zo**
Why don't you try these?
**[16:12] Zo**
They have a bit of a rock style, though.
**[16:14] Shin**
Uh, is this really rock?
**[16:16] Zo**
They're called the Curr Sedd Glasses.
**[16:19] Shin**
Curr Sedd Glasses?
**[16:21] Zo**
These will let you see through all the
world's truths clearly and distinctly.
**[16:29] Shin**
Clearly and distinctly?
**[16:30] Zo**
Indeed.
**[16:32] Zo**
All of nature and creation,
clearly and distinctly.
**[16:36] Shin**
*Uh, this goes beyond clearly and distinctly.*
**[16:38] Shin**
* I'm clearly and distinctly seeing*
* things that I shouldn't be seeing.*
**[16:42] Shin**
*"Curr Sedd Glasses"?*
**[16:44] Shin**
*These are just cursed glasses!*
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit
**[16:50] Vo**
Guardian spirit.
**[16:51] Shin**
*It started analyzing things!*
***SIGN*** Guardian spirits are spirits that follow a person or other entity and protect them. Also known as tutelary deities or guardian angels.
***SIGN*** Guardian spirits are spirits that follow a person or other entity and protect them. Also known as tutelary deities or guardian angels. -Extract from Vikipedia
**[16:58] Shin**
*It just copy-pasted from Vikipedia?!*
**[17:00] Shin**
* Why can I see guardian spirits?*
* These glasses are no joke!*
**[17:04] Shin**
*And I can't unequip these cursed glasses!*
**[17:07] Shin**
*That geezer!*
**[17:09] Shin**
*What the hell does he think he's sold me?!*
**[17:11] Shin**
*He'll pay for this!*
**[17:14] Shin**
*Th-The store's gone...*
**[17:19] Shin**
*No way.*
**[17:21] Shin**
* Was that store itself an*
* otherworldly eyewear store?*
**[17:25] Shin**
*What am I to do?*
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[17:28] Shin**
Gin-san!
**[17:29] Shin**
Please help me!
**[17:32] Gin**
What?
**[17:33] Gin**
I can't deal with all
this noise so early, man.
**[17:36] Gin**
What is it? You see something scary?
***SIGN*** One word and you're dead.
**[17:44] Shin**
N-No, it's nothing.
**[17:47] Shin**
*There was a huge one here, too!*
**[17:50] Shin**
*Gin-san has one crazy guardian spirit!*
**[17:53] Gin**
What's wrong with you?
Do you wanna be killed?
**[17:56] Shin**
I-I'm sorry. Please don't kill me.
**[17:59] Gin**
Seriously, what's gotten into you?
**[18:01] Shin**
*Spirit, nothing! That's practically a monster!*
**[18:03] Shin**
* Has this thing always been by Gin-san's*
* side since the anime started 10 years ago?*
**[18:08] Gin**
I'm busy as shit this morning, y'know.
**[18:10] Gin**
I have so much to do, even an
extra arm wouldn't be enough.
**[18:13] Shin**
*But you're using six arms!*
**[18:15] Shin**
* Your guardian spirit's helping*
* you with your morning stuff!*
**[18:18] Gin**
You should hurry up and get ready, too.
**[18:22] Gin**
We're being forced to take part
in the neighborhood sports meet.
***SIGN*** Chew well.
***SIGN*** What about rice? Want a normal serving or large?
**[18:25] Shin**
*What're you, a mom?!*
**[18:26] Shin**
* And what does this look*
* like without the glasses?*
**[18:29] Gin**
Oh, the miso soup moved.
**[18:31] Shin**
* A guardian spirit was behind the*
* moving miso soup phenomenon?*
**[18:35] Gin**
I need to take a dump.
**[18:36] Shin**
* That's how the morning*
* call of nature worked?!*
**[18:40] Gin**
Huh? Hey, who forgot to flush their poop?!
**[18:45] Shin**
*The unflushed poop was a guardian spirit's?!*
**[18:49] Shin**
*I-I had no idea*
**[18:51] Shin**
* that they were supporting*
* our lifestyles this way.*
**[18:54] Shin**
* But who knows what'd happen*
* to me if I exposed this?*
**[18:58] Shin**
* Anyway, I can't believe Gin-san*
* had such a rugged guardian spirit.*
**[19:02] Shin**
*No wonder he's so strong.*
**[19:05] Shin**
* Is he an ancestor of his, or*
* some god his family worshiped?*
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Asuraman.
**[19:09] Voice**
Guardian Spirit Asuraman.
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Asuraman.
Sakata Gintoki's guardian spirit.
The spirit of *Ginnikuman* erasers
he got from capsule machines as a kid.
**[19:12] Shin**
*He was a Ginraser spirit?!*
**[19:14] Shin**
* What the hell do you mean,*
* an eraser's spirit?!*
***SIGN*** He got seven Asuramans, so he threw away six. The vengeful malice of the six formed a spirit that plots to exact revenge on its host when it gets the chance.
**[19:24] Shin**
* This is no guardian spirit!*
* It's just a vengeful ghost!*
***SIGN*** Toilet
**[19:28] Gin**
Hey, we're out of toilet paper!
***SIGN*** Special ability: making minor things disappear with its eraser.
**[19:32] Shin**
*That's some petty revenge!*
**[19:35] Gin**
Shinpachi! Bring me some TP!
***SIGN*** I'll kill you if you bring it!!
**[19:38] Gin**
You there, Shinpachi?!
**[19:40] Gin**
Hey! TP!
**[19:40] Shin**
* Sorry, Gin-san, but your guardian spirit*
* has no intention of guarding you.*
**[19:42] Gin**
We're out of toilet paper, Shinpachi!
**[19:45] Gin**
Wake up, Kagura!
**[19:46] Gin**
Bring me toilet paper!
**[19:49] AA**
Quiet. Forget that, bring me booze.
**[19:54] Shin**
*Who the hell is this dude?!*
**[19:57] AA**
Hup.
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Alchu.
**[20:01] Voice**
Guardian Spirit Alchu.
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Alchu. Kagura's guardian spirit. The spirit of a p***mon that's super popular with kids.
**[20:03] Shin**
* What do you mean, Alchu?*
* What is it, a ripoff?!*
***SIGN*** A miraculous monster born from a collaboration between a drunkard and the P***chu stuffed toy Kagura made as a poor child who wanted to be part of the P***mon fad.
**[20:11] (Flashback) Kag**
No! My P***chu!
**[20:13] Shin**
*That drunkard looks familiar!*
**[20:15] Shin**
* Actually, the spirit looks*
* just like him, too!*
***SIGN*** Swore absolute loyalty to the shochu that gave birth to him, stays with it, and protects it at all times.
**[20:21] Shin**
He's just an alcoholic!
**[20:22] Gin**
Kagura! TP!
**[20:24] AA**
Oh, shut up.
**[20:26] AA**
Gimme a sec. I'll go call Master.
**[20:31] AA**
Master, shochu on the rocks.
**[20:32] Shin**
*Not a master bartender!*
**[20:35] AA**
Wake up, Master.
**[20:37] AA**
We're out of shochu, Master.
**[20:41] Shin**
*Who wakes someone up like that?!*
**[20:43] Kag**
Ew, something stinks!
**[20:45] Shin**
* Is that why she always*
* wakes up in a bad mood?!*
**[20:48] AA**
Master, get me sake.
**[20:51] AA**
Sake, sake. Sake, okay?
**[20:53] AA**
Sake, Sakay...
**[20:54] Kag**
So sleepy...
**[20:55] AA**
...kay.
**[20:56] Kag**
I wanna pee...
**[20:57] AA**
...kay.
**[20:58] Kag**
Going to the bathroom...
***SIGN*** Since alcohol is his primary source of energy, he's always requesting more sake from his master.
**[20:59] AA**
...kay.
**[21:00] Shin**
*The 'kays were coming from you?!*
**[21:02] Shin**
* That wasn't a verbal tic? It was*
* just the ramblings of a drunkard?!*
**[21:09] Kag**
Hey, somebody in there? Tell me...
**[21:10] AA**
...kay.
**[21:11] Kag**
What the heck? There's no response...
**[21:13] AA**
...kay.
**[21:13] Shin**
*Oh, I forgot about Gin-san.*
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit TP Knight
**[21:18] Voice**
Guardian Spirit TP Knight.
**[21:20] ---**
Why are you a spirit now?!
***SIGN*** The ill-will over a lack of TP and nobody bringing it to him brings this spirit of Sakata Gintoki to life every morning.
**[21:24] Shin**
You turn into a spirit over no paper?
You do this crap every morning?!
***SIGN*** While wandering to Matsu**to Kiyoshi for toilet paper, it also walks Sadaharu as his makeshift guardian spirit.
**[21:34] Shin**
*You were the one walking Sadaharu?!*
**[21:38] AA**
Take care of him.
**[21:40] Shin**
*My ass! You guys are totally useless!*
***SIGN*** Kabuki District Sports Meet
**[21:52] Oto**
Thank you all for taking time out of
your busy schedules to be here today.
***SIGN*** Kabuki District Sports Meet
**[21:59] Gin**
Jeez, why do old men and cabaret
girls have to race one another?
**[22:06] Shin**
* Old men and cabaret girls*
* would be one thing...*
**[22:11] Shin**
* But all I'm seeing is a*
* great underworld war!*
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirits Are Also
a Part of the Soul
**[23:49] Shin**
You know, this isn't even the
right season for a sports meet!
***SIGN*** Taking part in a big sports meet
***SIGN*** while listening to Jingle Bells has its own charm.
***SIGN*** But what becomes of Pachi-boy's glasses,
***SIGN*** which have turned into something quite bizarre?
# 341 - Guardian Spirits Are Also a Part of the Soul
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Shin**
*I don't know if that store really existed.*
**[00:08] Shin**
*At a seemingly cursed eyewear shop,*
**[00:10] Shin**
* I was sold a pair of Curr Sedd Glasses*
* that just turned out to be cursed glasses*
**[00:16] Shin**
* and started seeing all kinds*
* of spirits haunting our world.*
**[00:19] Shin**
*Gin-san's guardian spirit, Asuraman.*
***SIGN*** One word and you're dead.
**[00:22] Shin**
*Kagura-chan's guardian spirit, Alchu.*
**[00:25] Shin**
* And I have to take part in the*
* district sports meet in this state.*
**[00:29] Shin**
*That fierce battle is about to begin!*
***SIGN*** Kabuki District Sports Meet
**[00:33] Shin**
* Somebody get these messed-up*
* glasses off of me!*
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Slip Arc
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirits Are Also
a Part of the Soul
***SIGN*** Kabuki District Sports Meet
**[02:16] Kag**
We're on Team White.
***SIGN*** Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!
**[02:18] Kag**
The other guys are Team Red.
**[02:20] Kag**
Aw, I wanted to be Red.
**[02:23] Shin**
*Uh, in my eyes,*
**[02:26] Shin**
* they all look like Team*
* Dripping With Blood Red!*
**[02:30] G**
Hey, aren't those guys on Team White?
**[02:33] G**
How about we curse them?
**[02:34] G**
Don't do it.
**[02:35] G**
They're *the* Asuraman and Alchu's masters.
**[02:39] G**
What? That's them?
**[02:40] G**
Asuraman, killer of 8,000 guardian spirits,
**[02:42] G**
and Alchu, the man who defeated
Admiral Great Spirit Battler?
**[02:45] Shin**
* What? Are these guys famous*
* in guardian-spirit circles?*
**[02:48] G**
They mowed down a wave of guardian spirits
**[02:50] G**
and helped their masters win a box of
detergent in the Edo Supermarket Lottery.
**[02:54] G**
They're monsters.
**[02:56] (Flashback) G**
You win fourth prize!
**[02:58] Shin**
* Wait, there was a bloodbath*
* happening even then?!*
**[02:58] (Flashback) Gin**
What, just detergent?
**[03:02] G**
But that four-eyes is walking
around without a guardian spirit.
**[03:05] G**
Wanna go curse him?
**[03:07] G**
Even the slightest advantage could
help our masters in Team Red!
**[03:11] Shin**
* Wait, don't be hasty!*
* It's just a sports meet!*
**[03:15] Mad**
Hey!
**[03:16] Mad**
That guy's my friend!
**[03:19] G**
Y-You're...
**[03:20] G**
The hero of the Great Discarded
Lunch Box War, MAD—
**[03:29] Mad**
Get lost, scrubs.
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit MADAO Shades's guardian spirit
**[03:31] ---**
Guardian Spirit MADAO.
**[03:32] Shin**
*Wait, you're a guardian spirit?!*
***SIGN*** Became a spirit while still a dead man walking. Looks like a normal person at first glance, but the shades are the actual body, and the human is the spirit. Can't do anything without his shades.
**[03:36] Mad**
Are you okay, Shinpachi-kun?
**[03:37] Shin**
*No, are* you *okay?!*
**[03:39] Shin**
* You became a spirit at some point!*
* Your shades became the actual body!*
**[03:44] Mad**
If things go bad, this sports
meet could lead to deaths.
**[03:48] Shin**
*You're already dead, though.*
***SIGN*** Prize: 500,000 yen
**[03:50] Mad**
Looks like everyone's hyped after hearing
that the winning team gets a cash prize.
**[03:55] Mad**
Look at that.
**[03:56] G**
H-Hey, Yosaku, what's wrong?
**[03:58] G**
My tummy just started aching.
**[04:00] G**
Pull yourself together.
**[04:02] G**
Kichinosuke!
**[04:04] Mad**
That's the effect of having their
guardian spirits taken out.
**[04:07] Mad**
The fates of guardian spirits and
their masters are intertwined.
**[04:09] Mad**
If a guardian spirit's in trouble,
its master will get in trouble, too.
**[04:13] G**
What the hell happened?
**[04:14] G**
Most of Team White got wiped out!
**[04:16] Al**
Okay. Now we can hog all the prize money.
***SIGN*** I'm gonna kill you guys.
**[04:19] Shin**
*It was infighting?!*
***SIGN*** Kabuki District Sports Meet
**[04:21] MC**
Participants are to take their positions.
**[04:24] MC**
The first game is pole basketball.
**[04:26] MC**
Get set, go!
**[04:31] G**
All right! We won't lose to Team White!
**[04:34] G**
Huh?
**[04:36] G**
Take-chan, you've got
something red on your face.
**[04:38] G**
Huh? What is it?
***SIGN*** Kabuki District Association
**[04:44] Oto**
A bonding event like this
**[04:46] Oto**
isn't a bad idea once in a while.
**[04:48] Shin**
*What part of this is "bonding"?!*
**[04:50] Shin**
* Right beside the kids throwing*
* balls with smiles on their faces,*
**[04:53] Shin**
* guardian-spirit eyeballs are*
* flying all over the place!*
**[04:56] Shin**
* How am I supposed to play this game*
* while watching a scene out of hell?!*
**[05:00] Shin**
Someone get these cursed glasses off of me!
**[05:03] Kag**
Huh? That's weird.
**[05:05] Kag**
We've been throwing ball after ball,
but they're not going in the basket.
**[05:10] Gin**
Is it just me, or did a ball that
was clearly going in just rebound?
**[05:13] Kag**
It's like there's something invisible
in the basket already.
**[05:17] Shin**
*No...*
**[05:19] Shin**
* There's a haunting spirit*
* living in the basket!*
**[05:21] Shin**
* What the hell are you doing*
* up there, Hasegawa-san?!*
**[05:23] Mad**
R-Run away...
**[05:25] Kag**
Get in!
**[05:27] Gin**
Why won't they go in?
**[05:28] Shin**
* Wait! You may not see him,*
* but Hasegawa-san's in there!*
**[05:33] Mad**
Team Red has a crazy guardian spirit, too!
**[05:38] Mad**
A real monster!
**[05:42] Shin**
*Gin-san's guardian spirit!*
**[05:45] Kag**
What's wrong?
**[05:46] Kag**
Shinpachi! Gin-chan suddenly...
**[05:50] Shin**
*No way. Don't tell me...*
**[05:53] Tae**
Fancy running into you here, Shin-chan.
**[05:56] Tae**
You're all taking part, too?
**[05:58] Tae**
Unfortunately, it looks like
we're on opposing teams.
**[06:03] Tae**
But let's play fair and have fun, okay?
**[06:14] Shin**
*What part of this is fair?!*
**[06:16] Shin**
* You have an S-ranked OP monster*
* as a guardian spirit!*
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Dark Thousand-Armed Kannon
**[06:21] Voice**
Guardian Spirit Dark Thousand-Armed Kannon.
**[06:23] Shin**
* What kind of lifestyle did you lead to*
* get haunted by a spirit like that, Sis?!*
***SIGN*** Shimura Tae's Guardian Spirit The thousands of eggs she burned to death came together to form this spirit.
**[06:29] (Flashback) Tae**
Oh, no. I burned it again.
**[06:31] Shin**
*It's the resentment of omelets?!*
**[06:32] Shin**
* Just how deep must their grudge be*
* to turn them into that monster?!*
***SIGN*** Karma causes her to be haunted by Dark Kannon. She's put under the Dark Matter Curse, which burns everything she touches pitch-black.
**[06:36] (Flashback) Tae**
Oh, no. I burned the fish, too.
**[06:39] Shin**
*The dark matter was the result of a curse?!*
***SIGN*** She's also put under the Ya**da Yu Curse, meaning she has to live with a kid brother whose talents have all turned to ash.
**[06:43] Shin**
*Why am I being treated like a curse, too?!*
***SIGN*** Battle Points
**[06:45] Shin**
*What the hell are battle points?*
**[06:47] Shin**
* I didn't know we had such*
* a pretentious system!*
***SIGN*** (But if brother is present,
BP is reduced by 2,000.)
**[06:50] Shin**
*Could the brother be any more of a burden?!*
**[06:53] Shin**
* That arm I got a glimpse of back*
* then was one of its thousand arms?*
**[06:57] Shin**
* I can't believe it took out*
* Asuraman and Alchu in a flash.*
**[07:01] Shin**
* It's only the first match,*
* and we're half-dead already.*
**[07:03] Kag**
We got food poisoning, too?
**[07:06] Shin**
* There's no way we can beat*
* a monster like that.*
**[07:08] Tae**
Oh, we're out of balls.
**[07:11] Tae**
Staff, could we please get some more balls?
**[07:14] Kon**
Coming right up. We have
all the balls you want.
**[07:17] Kon**
Do you want red balls, white balls,
**[07:21] Kon**
or...
**[07:23] Kon**
my balls*ck?
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Ten-Thousand Vajra Ball Bodhisattva Balls*ck's guardian spirit.
**[07:29] Voice**
Guardian Spirit Ten-Thousand
Vajra Ball Bodhisattva.
**[07:32] Shin**
*What kinda guardian spirit is that?!*
***SIGN*** Along with being the guardian spirit of Kondo's balls*ck, it's also the guardian spirit of Shimura Tae's guardian spirit.
**[07:35] Shin**
* What do you mean, the guardian*
* spirit of a guardian spirit?*
***SIGN*** The thousands of sticky eggs that Kondo Isao wrapped in tissues and killed came together to form this spirit.
**[07:39] Shin**
*What eggs are you talking about?!*
***SIGN*** The karma from that puts him under the Stalker Curse, which makes him a devious stalker with a sticky body.
**[07:42] Shin**
* Don't try to blame a*
* curse for your stalking!*
***SIGN*** His resemblance to gorillas has nothing to do with any curses.
**[07:46] Shin**
*Blame a curse for* that*!*
***SIGN*** Gorilla Points
**[07:50] Shin**
*Hey, what the hell are gorilla points?!*
***SIGN*** But if Shimura Tae
is present, 2x GP.
**[07:53] Shin**
* Why'd it double? Don't*
* count Sis as a gorilla!*
**[07:56] Kon**
Make your choice: red balls,
white balls, or my balls*ck.
**[07:59] Kon**
Which will you pick?
**[08:01] Tae**
In that case,
**[08:02] Tae**
I'll use your soul balls as actual balls.
**[08:10] MC**
Time's up!
**[08:11] MC**
Both teams have scored
zero balls. It's a draw.
**[08:14] Shin**
*We tied!*
**[08:16] Shin**
* Thanks to the moron,*
* we somehow managed to tie!*
**[08:19] Shin**
*B-But how will we play the next game?*
**[08:22] Shin**
Gin-san, Kagura-chan,
we can't go any further.
**[08:24] Shin**
Let's retire. Enough of
this sports meet from hell.
**[08:28] Gin**
Don't be stupid. There's
prize money riding on this.
**[08:30] Gin**
Besides...
**[08:32] MC**
The next game is the
three-legged obstacle race.
**[08:35] Gin**
As you heard, the next event
relies on cooperation.
**[08:38] Gin**
We can get through this
with each other's help.
**[08:40] Shin**
* Uh, you need the help of your guardian*
* spirits most, and they've been taken out.*
**[08:44] Shin**
*Damn it.*
**[08:45] Shin**
* I'm the only one who can see them.*
* I have to do something.*
**[08:50] Al**
I can't believe a god-level guardian
spirit is taking part in a sports meet.
***SIGN*** It seems we'll have to go out all-out, too.
**[08:55] Al**
Yeah. We have no choice
but to do *that*, Asuraman.
**[08:59] Shin**
*Do what? Do you have an idea?*
**[09:01] Al**
If our masters are going three-legged,
**[09:04] Al**
we'll just do the same.
**[09:07] Al**
Guardian Fusion!
**[09:08] Sign**
Guardian Fusion
**[09:11] Shin**
Fusion?!
***SIGN*** Guardian Fusion refers to the phenomenon where multiple guardian spirits fuse together to form a stronger one.
***SIGN*** When Asuraman and Alchu do the Guardian Fusion dance,
***SIGN*** they protect Odd Jobs
***SIGN*** by evolving into a
divine guardian spirit.
***SIGN*** Divine Guardian Spirit MADAO (MAd DAmnation Omen)
**[09:27] Voice**
Divine Guardian Spirit MADAO.
**[09:30] Shin**
*Something else got mixed in!*
**[09:43] Voice**
Divine Guardian Spirit MADAO.
***SIGN*** MADAO: A guardian spirit accidentally born when a fly joined the Guardian Fusion. Currently unemployed.
**[09:46] Shin**
*We forgot about the fly in the basket!*
***SIGN*** The three spirit's powers have combined, meaning it's an unemployed alcoholic that can only communicate with a whiteboard.
**[09:52] Shin**
*It's just a fusion of all their problems!*
***SIGN*** Battle Points
**[09:56] Shin**
*Whoa, that's super high!*
***SIGN*** (But on days when it lacks
the motivation to work, BP
is reduced by 31999.)
**[09:58] Shin**
*So it's trash all 365 days of the year!*
**[10:00] MC**
Participants, are you ready?
**[10:03] Shin**
*Crap.*
**[10:04] Shin**
*The race is about to begin.*
**[10:06] MC**
Three-legged obstacle race! Get set, go!
**[10:12] Shin**
*Not a single group's running on three legs!*
**[10:15] Shin**
*What the hell is this creepy game?*
**[10:17] Shin**
* Is this how three-legged*
* races have always worked?*
**[10:20] Shin**
*But we might have a shot here.*
**[10:21] Shin**
*Divine Guardian Spirit MADAO is a quadruped.*
**[10:23] Shin**
*It's perfect to ride on!*
**[10:27] Shin**
*That's how it walks?!*
**[10:30] Shin**
* What I thought was its face*
* was actually its sole?!*
**[10:32] Shin**
* It's gonna take more than a hundred*
* years to cross the finish line!*
**[10:35] Shin**
* Get off! You're sure to*
* go much faster that way!*
***SIGN*** Hey, taxi.
**[10:40] Shin**
*Don't try to hail a cab!*
**[10:45] Kat**
Gintoki, Leader. What are you doing here?
**[10:49] Kat**
Want a ride on my guardian spirit?
**[10:51] Voice**
Guardian Spirit...
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Katsulla Not Corolla
**[10:53] Kat**
Katsulla Not Corolla.
**[10:55] Shin**
*Why is a Corolla your guardian spirit?!*
***SIGN*** Katsura Kotaro's guardian spirit. When he got in a traffic accident, his soul was
split in two. One half entered a Corolla, and the other was bound for hell,
but was given a ride to his body by the Corolla and safely made it through.
**[11:00] Shin**
*But it didn't! Half his soul is still gone!*
***SIGN*** Ever since, he kept the spirit of the car around even after it went out of service, used it to escape in emergencies, and came to be known as Runaway Kotarou.
**[11:07] Shin**
* Runaway Kotarou was running*
* away in a Corolla?!*
***SIGN*** In return for that power, he would be put under the Katsura Not Zura Curse, meaning he had to always drag the Corolla around with his hair and abuse his hair roots to the limit.
**[11:13] Shin**
* You were always pushing*
* yourself to the extreme?*
**[11:15] Shin**
* The "I'm not Zura, I'm Katsura"*
* thing always bothered you?*
**[11:18] Kat**
What's wrong? Aren't you getting on, Gintoki?
**[11:20] Gin**
Uh, get on what?
**[11:21] Kat**
Right. We're on opposite sides now.
**[11:24] Kat**
I'll be waiting for you
at the finish line, then!
**[11:27] Shin**
*Is that even allowed?!*
**[11:28] Shin**
* They're the biggest obstacles*
* in this obstacle race!*
***SIGN*** Danger
Demons
**[11:33] MC**
Whoa, an explosion!
**[11:35] MC**
They've run into the talisman area,
which fends off all wicked beings!
**[11:40] Kat**
Corolla!
**[11:41] Shin**
*What the hell is a talisman area?!*
**[11:43] Shin**
*Why are talismans part of an obstacle race?!*
**[11:46] Shin**
* They're clearly out to*
* get the guardian spirits!*
**[11:52] Shin**
* They're all passing on one after*
* another! What's with this sports meet?*
**[11:55] Kat**
Hang in there, Corolla.
I won't leave you behind.
**[11:59] Shin**
* The master's carrying his guardian*
* spirit! Talk about role reversal!*
**[12:03] Hij**
Now!
**[12:05] MC**
Whoa! There's another pair in hot pursuit!
**[12:08] Hij**
Katsura, your time's up! Surrender
to the long arm of the law!
**[12:12] Shin**
*Why're you guys running on three legs, too?!*
**[12:12] Bo**
One, two... One, two...
**[12:15] Kat**
They were waiting for the
moment my Corolla broke down?
**[12:19] Kat**
Of all the cowardly schemes!
**[12:21] Hij**
Keep talking!
**[12:22] Hij**
You dug your own grave by taking part
in a sports meet as a Joi Rebel!
**[12:26] Shin**
* You're one to talk, cop taking*
* part in a sports meet!*
**[12:28] Kat**
But can you two cross this talisman area?
**[12:32] Kat**
If you can't, you'll never
catch me and my Corolla!
**[12:38] Kat**
Wha...
**[12:38] MC**
Wait, what's going on here? The talismans!
**[12:43] Kat**
Impossible! You're negating the talismans?
**[12:47] Kat**
Don't tell me, your guardian spirit...
**[12:51] Kat**
It's Western?!
***SIGN*** Guardian Ghost Mayorati Not Maserati
**[12:52] Voice**
Guardian Ghost...
**[12:53] Hij**
Mayorati Not Maserati.
**[12:55] Shin**
*That's it? It's a foreign brand?!*
**[12:59] Kat**
A foreign car, not a domestic one? Of course
Japanese talismans wouldn't affect it!
**[13:04] Kat**
That guardian spirit is cheating!
**[13:06] Shin**
* Your guardian spirits are Corolla*
* and Maserati! You're all cheating!*
***SIGN*** Hijikata Toshiro's guardian spirit. The spirit of a rich man's Maserati he ruined by pouring mayonnaise in its tank as a prank back when he was a bad boy.
***SIGN*** Due to that, he was put under the Mayorati Curse, meaning he has to intake mayonnaise at regular intervals.
**[13:15] Shin**
*You were cursed, too?!*
**[13:17] Shin**
* Why are all your character*
* traits made up of curses?!*
**[13:20] (Flashback) Hij**
Hold it!
***SIGN*** He was also put under the V-Shaped Bangs Curse, meaning his bangs are always being pulled by a Maserati, putting him at risk of balding.
**[13:24] Shin**
* Of course they'd call you*
* the demonic vice chief!*
**[13:26] Hij**
Katsura!
**[13:27] Hij**
You're done for now!
**[13:29] Hij**
We've got this race in the bag!
**[13:31] Shin**
*What happened to catching him?!*
**[13:36] MC**
Whoa, the Shinsengumi have
come to a standstill!
**[13:40] MC**
Is that... a cross?!
**[13:43] MC**
It's a godly trap that can fend off
wicked beings from overseas, too!
**[13:47] Shin**
*They even have an obstacle like that?!*
**[13:49] MC**
Actually, upon closer inspection,
it looks like the letter T?
**[13:51] Oki**
What're you doing, Hijikata-san?
**[13:54] Oki**
Could you move your leg already?
**[13:56] Oki**
If you waste too much time,
**[13:58] Oki**
I'll rip that leg of yours right off.
***SIGN*** Divine Guardian Spirit Tormenting Sadist
**[14:02] Voice**
Divine Guardian Spirit...
**[14:03] Oki**
Tormenting Sadist.
**[14:05] Shin**
*It was your doing?!*
**[14:06] Shin**
*What kind of god is named Tormenting Sadist?!*
**[14:08] (Flashback) Oki**
I hear Maserati can run on mayonnaise, too.
**[14:11] (Flashback) Hij**
Don't be stupid.
**[14:13] Shin**
* You were the mastermind*
* who ruined the Maserati?*
***SIGN*** After he tricked Hijikata Toshiro and was tied up and left deep in the mountains,
***SIGN*** he met a god in the dark.
**[14:18] (Flashback) T**
Do you want revenge?
**[14:19] (Flashback) Oki**
Wh-Who's there?
**[14:21] (Flashback) T**
I'm you. The very darkness within you.
**[14:25] Shin**
*It's basically a devil!*
***SIGN*** It's stuck in Hijikata Toshiro's body and is sucking up his life force.
**[14:30] Shin**
*That's one disturbing guardian spirit!*
**[14:32] Kat**
This is our chance, Elizabeth.
**[14:34] Kat**
We've made it past the talisman area.
**[14:36] Kat**
Now to overtake them in
one go with our Corolla!
***SIGN*** Divine Guardian Spirit God of Toilets
**[14:45] Voice**
Divine Guardian Spirit God of Toilets.
***SIGN*** Elizabeth's guardian spirit. A god he gave birth to in order to escape reality while cleaning the toilet.
***SIGN*** Cleans up all impurities, whether the toilet is Japanese or Western style.
**[14:51] Shin**
*You're getting in your partner's way, too?!*
***SIGN*** Bleaurgh
**[14:52] Kat**
Corolla! My Corolla!
**[14:55] Hij**
Damn it, what's going on?
I can't move my legs!
**[14:58] Shin**
* Why are both of them running three-legged*
* with their biggest obstacles?*
**[15:04] MC**
Time's up! The game is over!
***SIGN*** Finish Line
**[15:06] MC**
Neither team has crossed the
finish line. It's a draw.
**[15:10] Shin**
*Like we could ever cross it!*
**[15:12] Shin**
* All we're getting are guardian-spirit*
* corpses and injured people!*
**[15:16] Shin**
*We really should retire.*
**[15:17] BG**
This way!
**[15:17] Shin**
*Any more would be...*
**[15:21] Shin**
*Was that the eyewear seller just now?*
**[15:23] Gin**
Hey, what's wrong, Shinpachi?
**[15:26] Shin**
* He was here. Is he taking*
* part in the sports meet?*
**[15:30] Shin**
*Where is he? Where'd he go?*
**[15:32] MC**
Let's move on to the next event.
**[15:34] MC**
We had a bread-eating race,
**[15:37] MC**
a scavenger hunt, and a cavalry
battle planned after this,
**[15:40] MC**
but due to a lack of participants, we'll
combine all of these into one final game.
**[15:45] MC**
The team that eats the opponent's bread and
protects its own bread to the end wins.
***SIGN*** Grandpa's dentures
**[15:50] MC**
But you can borrow the items written
on the papers strewn about the course
**[15:56] MC**
and eat them or use them as a weapon.
**[15:59] MC**
Additionally, the member riding on top
**[16:03] MC**
doesn't have to be human.
**[16:04] Shin**
*Using guardian spirits is tacitly allowed?!*
**[16:07] Shin**
* What's the meaning of this? What do*
* those people think they're carrying?!*
**[16:12] Shin**
*But maybe...*
**[16:14] Shin**
*Maybe the eyewear seller is among them.*
**[16:16] Shin**
* If I find him, I might be able*
* to take off these cursed glasses.*
**[16:21] Gin**
Listen, Shinpachi.
**[16:23] Gin**
Even if you're hungry, don't
you dare touch that bread.
**[16:26] MC**
Get set, go!
**[16:31] Shin**
*Wait, I'm riding?!*
**[16:32] Shin**
*You think I'm a spirit?!*
**[16:35] Shin**
*They're really gonna make me a spirit!*
**[16:42] Shin**
*MADAO!*
**[16:44] Shin**
* It was struggling so much to move*
* before, but to protect me...*
***SIGN*** Gimme the bread.
**[16:52] Shin**
*That's your goal?!*
**[16:53] Shin**
Wait, wait! Not this bread!
**[16:56] Shin**
If you want bread, go after the enemy's!
**[16:58] Shin**
The enemy's...
**[17:00] Shin**
*The enemy's bread is huge!*
**[17:03] Shin**
*The enemy's bread is fast!*
**[17:05] Shin**
*The enemy's bread is a baguette!*
**[17:08] Shin**
This isn't working.
**[17:09] Shin**
Let's borrow a weapon, Gin-san.
Pick up a piece of paper.
**[17:12] Shin**
What does it say? Please be a weapon!
***SIGN*** Love and Courage
**[17:16] Gin**
Excuse me. Could any of you
lend us love and courage?
**[17:21] Gin**
We promise to give it back.
**[17:22] Gin**
Love and courage separate is fine, too.
**[17:24] G**
That stuff's always been in your hearts.
**[17:28] Shin**
*Bullshit!*
**[17:29] Shin**
* Sure, they're the greatest weapons one*
* could have, but they're useless right now!*
**[17:32] Shin**
*We need something more specific!*
***SIGN*** Daddy's Bat
**[17:35] Kag**
Could any of you lend us a daddy's bat?
**[17:39] Kag**
Daddy and bat separate is fine, too, 'kay?
**[17:42] G**
You can use this, then.
**[17:45] Shin**
*The daddy and the bat really are separate!*
**[17:47] G**
Sasuke, are you sure?
That's a memento of Daddy.
**[17:50] G**
It's fine. I'm sure Daddy up in
heaven will allow it with a smile.
**[17:54] Shin**
*Like we could borrow that!*
**[17:55] Shin**
*Daddy's not smiling at all! He's crying!*
**[17:57] Shin**
* We need something that's not*
* Daddy's or something sad!*
***SIGN*** Mommy's Jackknife
**[18:00] G**
Can you really wield me?
**[18:03] Shin**
*That's just an edgy mommy!*
**[18:04] Shin**
*That's sad in its own way!*
***SIGN*** Grandpa's a Jack
**[18:08] Shin**
*Who?! What does he have to do with a weapon?!*
**[18:11] Shin**
*We need something that's not so complicated!*
***SIGN*** Divine Sword God Death Crimson Blade Mk. 2
**[18:14] Gin**
Excuse me. Could any of you lend us a Divine
Sword God Death Crimson Blade Mk. 2?
**[18:20] Shin**
*The weapon itself is complicated now!*
**[18:22] Kag**
God and Death Crimson
separate is fine, too, 'kay?
**[18:26] Shin**
* As if anyone would have something*
* like that at a sports meet!*
**[18:28] G**
Sure, if you're okay with mine.
**[18:30] Shin**
*You have one? Who the hell are you?!*
**[18:33] Shin**
* What's a Divine Sword God Death*
* Crimson Blade Mk. 2 doing here?*
**[18:37] Shin**
* But we could win the*
* cavalry battle with this.*
**[18:43] Shin**
Why the hell are you eating the Divine
Sword God Death Crimson Blade Mk. 2?!
***SIGN*** They said it was okay to eat borrowed items...
**[18:48] Shin**
Do you really get it? This is a Divine
Sword God Death Crimson Blade Mk. 2!
***SIGN*** Divine Sword God Death Crimson Blade Mk. 2 is a holy sword that purges evil. Any evil that touches the blade will be burned by holy flames.
**[18:56] Shin**
* Oh, crap. Because he ate a holy*
* sword, MADAO's body is...*
**[18:59] Gin**
M-My body's losing strength!
**[19:02] Shin**
Gin-san, Kagura-chan!
**[19:06] Shin**
*I'm done for! It's all over!*
**[19:13] Shin**
Huh?
**[19:15] Shin**
Wh-Where am I?
***SIGN*** Glasses
**[19:24] Zoff**
Your glasses are right here.
**[19:27] Zoff**
I fixed them up nice and good.
**[19:30] Zoff**
However, these glasses are really old.
**[19:33] Zoff**
If you wear them, you'll go back
to not being able to see anything.
**[19:38] Zoff**
Is that all right?
**[19:41] Zoff**
I wanted you to see it at least once...
**[19:45] Zoff**
See the world we live in.
**[19:49] Zoff**
Should you put on these glasses,
you'll never return to this world.
**[19:55] Zoff**
But I want you to remember once
in a while that you three have
**[20:00] Zoff**
Asuraman,
**[20:02] Zoff**
Alchu,
**[20:05] Zoff**
and me by your side.
**[20:11] Zoff**
We're always watching over you,
**[20:16] Zoff**
Master.
**[20:23] Kag**
This is bad, Shinpachi!
**[20:25] Gin**
We haven't gotten a weapon yet!
**[20:27] Mad**
Hey! What now, Shinpachi-kun?
**[20:30] Shin**
I'm already holding a weapon.
**[20:33] Shin**
I don't have to see now. I know.
**[20:36] Shin**
Asuraman,
**[20:38] Shin**
Alchu,
**[20:39] Shin**
and my glasses!
**[20:43] Shin**
Your hearts and ours are always as one.
**[20:47] Shin**
Even if I can't see you, these glasses
clearly display your feelings!
***SIGN*** Guardian Spirit Glasses. Shinpachi's glasses, which have been repaired and fitted with a new feature.
***SIGN*** Their wearer can see distant feelings and emotions
***SIGN*** Their wearer can see distant feelings and emotions, but...
***SIGN*** ...is totally farsighted and unable to see anything close.
***SIGN*** Kabuki District Sports Meet
**[21:13] Shin**
All right. Time to buy new glasses.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** heads toward its conclusion
***SIGN*** Shogun Assassination Arc
**[22:55] Gin**
Before dawn.
**[22:58] Gin**
The night is darkest just before the dawn.
**[23:01] Gin**
But keep your eyes open.
***SIGN*** Farewell Shinsengumi Arc
**[23:05] Hij**
Kondo-san, I've finally become
**[23:11] Hij**
a proper member of the Shinsengumi.
***SIGN*** The Battle on Rakuyo Arc
**[23:17] Kag**
I still have a job to do, huh?
***SIGN*** And now...
**[23:26] Tae**
We're basically a colony.
**[23:28] Kyu**
Our country may have been done
for long before all of this.
**[23:34] Mad**
We can't give up.
**[23:35] Kat**
This is Lord Tokugawa Nobunobu!
**[23:38] Oto**
I wonder where those morons
are and what they're up to.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[23:44] Gin**
We've got you covered.
**[23:45] Gin**
From walking your dog to keeping Earth safe,
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:48] Gin**
we Odd Jobs will do anything.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Look forward to it.
***SIGN*** The final long arc begins next episode.
***SIGN*** We enter the Silver Soul Arc.
# 342 - Try As You Might to Make a Natural Perm Go Away, It Will Always Return
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] Shin**
* With the assassination of the 14th*
* shogun, Tokugawa Shigeshige-sama,*
***SIGN*** A New Shogun Is Appointed
**[00:10] Shin**
* we were swallowed whole*
* by the winds of change.*
**[00:15] Shin**
*The Shinsengumi disbanded,*
**[00:16] Shin**
* and no matter how many sacrifices had*
* to be made, the desire to protect Edo*
**[00:20] Shin**
*set each of us on a search for our own path.*
**[00:24] Shin**
* Following a fierce battle on*
* Kagura-chan's home planet, Rakuyo,*
**[00:28] Shin**
*the untold past*
**[00:30] Shin**
* and the true goal of the immortal Naraku*
* leader, Utsuro, were revealed to us.*
**[00:38] Shin**
* He made the Altana reserves of seven*
* planets go berserk, destroying them.*
**[00:42] Shin**
* The Tendoshu's Altana Preservation Agency*
* had monopolized the universe's Altana,*
**[00:47] Shin**
* but Utsuro's actions meant that it was*
* freed and essentially relinquished.*
**[00:53] Shin**
* The planets that retook their Altana*
* decided to end the Agency's rule,*
**[00:57] Shin**
* and to that end, formed the*
* Altana Liberation Army*
**[00:59] Shin**
* and descended upon Earth,*
* where the Tendoshu were.*
**[01:03] Shin**
* Utsuro's goal was to use*
* this interplanetary war*
**[01:07] Shin**
*to turn Earth into space dust.*
**[01:11] Shin**
*Our final battle is about to begin.*
**[01:19] Mad**
*We can't give up.*
**[01:22] Mad**
* Even if we find ourselves*
* in the depths of despair*
**[01:26] Mad**
*or within the darkest abyss,*
**[01:30] Mad**
*as long as we keep our eyes open,*
**[01:33] Mad**
*we can still find a ray of hope.*
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:37] W**
He's been at it for about an hour now.
**[01:40] W**
It's scary, Officer. Can you
do something about him?
**[01:44] O**
Hey, what's the matter?
**[01:47] O**
Did you drop something down there?
**[01:49] O**
Hey, are you okay?
**[01:52] O**
Are you stuck? You can't get out?
**[01:59] O**
Hang on! We'll get you
out of there right now!
**[02:04] G**
He's totally stuck.
**[02:06] O**
Yeah. One, two...
**[02:09] Mad**
*I won't give up!*
**[02:11] Mad**
*I won't ever...*
**[02:16] O**
What's that light?
**[02:20] Mad**
*...give up!*
***SIGN*** Children's Bank
**[02:42] Mad**
Go to hell, world!
**[02:45] Oto**
It really will!
**[02:47] Oto**
Why are you wallowing in such trivial
despair when Edo is in peril?
**[02:52] Oto**
Do you realize the situation we're in?
**[02:55] Mad**
Who cares about Edo?
**[02:57] Mad**
Peril or not, my life is on
the brink of ruin anyway.
**[03:03] Mad**
All this means is that you people have
finally found yourselves in my shoes.
**[03:07] Mad**
Welcome to my world.
**[03:09] Cat**
You know, maybe this guy is
the final villain in this anime.
**[03:13] Oto**
Such is the strength of one
who has nothing to lose.
**[03:15] Oto**
We should all try to
avoid ending up like him.
**[03:19] Tam**
I'm back.
**[03:21] Oto**
How was the town, Tama?
**[03:27] (Flashback) Gen**
It's like we've gone back
in time twenty years.
**[03:30] (Flashback) Gen**
Back to the Amanto invasion.
**[03:31] (Flashback) Gen**
Our country had lived in
isolation for centuries,
**[03:34] (Flashback) Gen**
but aliens suddenly swooped down on it.
**[03:36] (Flashback) Gen**
People ran around in constant fear of them,
**[03:39] (Flashback) Gen**
and in their place, the Amanto walked
around like they owned the place.
**[03:43] (Flashback) Gen**
Basically, that fear has
reared its ugly head again.
**[03:47] (Flashback) Tae**
It's like we're a colony.
**[03:50] (Flashback) Kyu**
We actually are.
**[03:51] (Flashback) Kyu**
Sure, there was no war, but this
country's under their rule now.
**[03:56] (Flashback) Kyu**
The Altana Liberation Army is an allied front
against the Altana Preservation Agency.
**[04:04] (Flashback) Kyu**
Their goal is to wipe out the Agency.
**[04:07] (Flashback) Kyu**
They've already crushed the Agency's
bases on several other planets
**[04:11] (Flashback) Kyu**
and taken back the Altana
that was under its control.
**[04:14] (Flashback) Kyu**
And they've cornered the Tendoshu,
who are in this country,
**[04:18] (Flashback) Kyu**
and taken over most of the
major government bureaus.
**[04:21] (Flashback) Kyu**
But the Tendoshu went into hiding,
**[04:25] (Flashback) Kyu**
and the shogun, who was supposed to sort
out this mess, can't be reached, either.
**[04:29] (Flashback) Kyu**
The bakufu has collapsed,
**[04:32] (Flashback) Kyu**
meaning there's nothing left
to defend the people anymore.
**[04:38] (Flashback) Kyu**
Our country may have been done
for long before all of this.
**[04:45] (Flashback) Tsu**
So we were caught in the crossfire between
the Tendoshu and the Liberation Army?
**[04:51] (Flashback) Tsu**
If so, can we resolve this by bringing
the Tendoshu's heads to them?
**[04:56] (Flashback) Sac**
It's not just the Tendoshu.
**[04:59] (Flashback) Sac**
Taking over this planet is
part of their plan, too.
**[05:03] (Flashback) Tsu**
Should we chase those rowdies out, then?
**[05:06] (Flashback) Sac**
At this point,
**[05:08] (Flashback) Sac**
what moron would turn the entire universe against them by fighting?
**[05:11] (Flashback) Tsu**
You know who.
**[05:14] (Flashback) Tsu**
Tama-san...
**[05:15] (Flashback) All**
Where are they now?
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[05:24] Oto**
I wonder where those morons
are and what they're up to.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
***SIGN*** Snack Otose
**[05:32] Mad**
*We can't give up.*
**[05:38] A**
You dare insult us?!
**[05:41] A**
We're fighting to liberate people all across
the universe from the Tendoshu's rule.
**[05:47] A**
Are you saying you're not willing
to cooperate with our effort?
**[05:49] G**
P-Please spare me!
**[05:51] G**
I'm just an old man living
each day as it comes!
**[05:55] G**
My house is all empty now!
There's nothing more I can offer you!
**[06:00] A**
That so? We'll take that house, then.
**[06:08] Mad**
* Even if we find ourselves*
* in the depths of despair...*
**[06:14] A**
You have some nerve to serve this
awful booze to the Liberation Army.
**[06:18] A**
Are you one of the Agency's minions?
**[06:21] W**
N-No!
**[06:23] A**
Then bring us the most
expensive booze you've got!
**[06:26] A**
Okay, you've had too much to drink.
**[06:30] Mad**
*...or within the darkest abyss...*
**[06:35] A**
Huh? What are you doing?
**[06:40] A**
I'd heard that this planet was home to proud
warriors you can't find anywhere else,
**[06:46] A**
but did you lose your pride along with your
change while living under Tendoshu rule?
**[06:53] A**
Well, go ahead and pick them up.
**[07:00] A**
Even after the Tendoshu are gone,
**[07:02] A**
you people will never get
back what you've lost.
**[07:10] Mad**
*...as long as we keep our eyes open,*
**[07:19] Mad**
*we can still find a ray of hope.*
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
***SIGN*** Job Request
**[07:33] Mad**
*To Odd Jobs,*
**[07:35] Mad**
*I've gathered the wishes of Edo's citizens.*
**[07:45] Mad**
*This job request entails just one task:*
**[07:51] Mad**
* taking back the land of*
* the samurai together.*
**[07:57] A**
Who the hell are you?
**[08:02] Mad**
Immigration Bureau Chief,
**[08:05] Mad**
Hasegawa Taizo!
***SIGN*** Job Request
**[08:19] Oto**
Looks like a temple's offering box, huh?
**[08:21] Oto**
After learning that there
are no gods in our world,
**[08:25] Oto**
I guess people turned to
this place as a last resort.
**[08:28] Oto**
Who knows what they prayed to
those blights on society for?
**[08:32] Oto**
All this money is going to be used for
is to pay off the rent they owe me.
**[08:38] Tae**
I'm sure these people don't mind.
**[08:41] Tae**
Even if they're blights on society, and
this money will only be used to pay rent,
***SIGN*** Job Request
**[08:45] Tae**
it's okay if it brings Odd Jobs back here.
**[08:48] Tae**
That's what everyone wants.
**[08:53] Oto**
Is that so? How charitable of them.
**[08:56] Oto**
If it were me, I'd wish for
something more concrete.
**[08:59] Tae**
Like what?
**[09:01] Oto**
"I hope more rent money piles up here."
***SIGN*** Job Request
**[09:05] Tae**
Isn't that great? Your wish
has already come true.
**[09:12] Oto**
Good grief.
**[09:13] Oto**
Looks like I'll need not just rent money,
but also money for repairs now.
**[09:22] Mad**
I won't let you do as you please
in this country anymore.
**[09:25] A**
Immigration Bureau?
**[09:28] A**
Forget that, this country's entire
government is already dea—
**[09:31] Mad**
It's not dead.
**[09:35] Mad**
The country may have fallen,
**[09:39] Mad**
but the samurai still live.
**[09:44] Mad**
Those guys will come back.
**[09:47] Mad**
So we have to defend this
country until they do.
**[09:52] Mad**
We can't waste time wallowing in despair.
**[09:55] Mad**
Kid, we may not be aware of it,
**[09:59] Mad**
but we all live atop a pit of despair.
**[10:01] Mad**
Tomorrow, we could lose our
job, have nothing to eat,
**[10:05] Mad**
or poop our pants at temple school.
**[10:08] Mad**
Even the slightest slip-ups like those
can make despair bare its fangs at us.
**[10:14] Mad**
I used to wonder why I was
the only one suffering.
**[10:17] Mad**
But maybe I needed to go through
those times to stand here today.
**[10:21] Mad**
Maybe I needed that in order to prop up
Edo when all of it fell into despair.
**[10:27] Mad**
To become the last watchman of despair.
**[10:31] Mad**
But while despair can bare
its fangs at any moment,
**[10:34] Mad**
so too can hope.
**[10:36] Mad**
In my eyes, this despair is
just one of countless many.
**[10:41] Mad**
It's so trivial that just finding a coin
on the street will make it evaporate.
**[10:48] Mad**
Come, let's go find a ray
of hope within this despair.
**[10:53] Mad**
Take me to your boss. As Immigration
Bureau Chief, I need to talk to him.
**[10:59] Kid**
Mister!
**[11:01] Mad**
Kid...
**[11:02] Mad**
No, people of Edo.
**[11:05] Mad**
Even if you're surrounded by
despair, keep your eyes open.
**[11:08] Mad**
As long as you do,
**[11:11] Mad**
you'll find hope lying around everywhere.
**[11:15] Kid**
Uh, you're the one lying on the ground!
**[11:19] A**
Okay, that should be enough.
**[11:22] A**
What do we do with him?
**[11:24] A**
Throw him in a cell or something.
**[11:26] A**
Sir!
**[11:31] Mad**
Um, didn't you hear me? I asked you to...
ow, ow, ow... take me to your HQ...
**[11:37] A**
And why should we do that?
**[11:39] Mad**
I mean, I'm from the Immigration Bureau!
**[11:42] A**
Where's your ID?
**[11:43] Mad**
Well, we're closed right now,
so I don't have it on me.
**[11:45] A**
Okay, take him away.
**[11:47] Mad**
Wait, wait, wait!
**[11:49] Mad**
Look, that kid's staring at me.
**[11:51] Mad**
He's watching the guy who was ranting
about hope fall into despair in an instant!
**[11:56] Mad**
Spare a thought for him, would
you? Spare me, would you?
**[11:59] Mad**
Take a hint, would you?!
**[12:01] A**
Nobody asked you to save him.
**[12:03] Mad**
I'll kowtow to you later!
I'll lick your shoes or whatever!
**[12:07] Mad**
Could you let me into your HQ,
even if it's just the tip?
**[12:10] A**
Uh, you're basically kowtowing already.
**[12:12] Kid**
M-Mister!
**[12:13] Mad**
Don't look at me like that!
**[12:16] Mad**
Close your eyes and never open them again!
**[12:19] A**
Weren't you telling him to
keep his eyes open earlier?
**[12:22] But**
This planet is as noisy as ever.
**[12:24] Baka**
Maybe a chimpanzee broke out of the zoo.
**[12:28] Baka**
The animals here might go
down with the planet soon.
**[12:33] Baka**
I want to pick up some of
the rare species for myself.
**[12:35] Baka**
Hey, you guys over there.
**[12:38] Baka**
Let me take a look at that chimpanzee.
**[12:50] Oto**
What's this about?
**[12:52] Oto**
I'm sorry to say, but we don't get any
customers as loaded as the Tendoshu.
**[12:56] Oto**
Only stinky, flat-broke old men.
**[12:59] Tama**
If we don't give them all the
money, goods, and food we have,
**[13:02] Tama**
they say they'll consider us the
Tendoshu's minions and destroy the bar.
**[13:05] Cat**
"Liberation Army," my ass!
You guys are just thieves!
**[13:08] Cat**
Otose-san's fortune belongs to me!
**[13:11] Oto**
Uh, you're the thief here.
**[13:12] A**
Securing supplies in a combat zone
is established practice during war.
**[13:16] A**
If you say you're not willing
to cooperate with our effort,
**[13:19] A**
we'll simply take everything by force.
**[13:21] A**
This town seems to have a
lot of hard-headed folk.
**[13:25] A**
Might be easier to destroy it all.
**[13:28] Tae**
You people—
**[13:31] Oto**
Take whatever you want. But it'd be nice
if you could leave my smokes alone.
**[13:36] Tae**
Otose-san!
**[13:37] Oto**
It's fine.
**[13:39] Oto**
Even if it's empty, as long as
you're in it, it's still their home.
**[13:44] A**
Oh, really?
**[13:53] A**
We never cared about this filthy bar, anyway.
***SIGN*** Gin-chan
**[13:57] A**
But it'll make a good example to show
others what happens if they defy us.
**[14:01] A**
We don't need anything
other than these girls.
**[14:04] A**
They'll provide some nice R&R for our
men who are worn out from this long war.
**[14:10] Cat**
You bastards!
**[14:12] Cat**
Are you saying I'm trash like this granny?!
**[14:15] Oto**
That's your problem?!
**[14:16] A**
Move your feet. We're leaving.
**[14:21] Tae**
*Odd Jobs...*
**[14:24] Tae**
*Everyone's wishes...*
**[14:30] [SONG] Sign**
Job Request
**[14:34] Gin**
We've got you covered.
**[14:38] Gin**
Your request has been duly received.
**[14:42] Shin**
What does it involve?
**[14:43] Kag**
Doesn't matter what.
**[14:45] Gin**
From walking your dog to keeping Earth safe,
**[14:49] Gin**
we Odd Jobs will do anything.
***SIGN*** Try As You Might to Make a Natural Perm
Go Away, It Will Always Return
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[16:30] Oto**
Boy, you sure kept us waiting.
**[16:33] Oto**
I'd like to say "welcome home,"
**[16:36] Oto**
but you took so long
**[16:38] Oto**
that you no longer have a home.
**[16:43] Gin**
Don't worry about it.
**[16:44] Gin**
We'll take it all back,
**[16:47] Gin**
so let us say it anyway.
**[16:50] All**
We're back.
**[16:56] Gin**
Hey, I dunno if you're heroes or villains,
**[17:01] Gin**
but it looks like you did a number
on this town while we were away.
**[17:05] Gin**
Don't you know?
**[17:07] Gin**
When entering somebody else's
home in this country,
**[17:09] Gin**
both good and evil people
take off their shoes.
**[17:13] Gin**
It's considered basic etiquette.
***SIGN*** Gin-chan
**[17:17] Gin**
Get your filthy feet off of that sign.
**[17:21] Gin**
Don't enter my country with your stinky feet!
**[17:26] A**
Your country doesn't exist anymore!
**[17:36] Gin**
What's wrong, O Great Liberation Army?
**[17:38] Gin**
You can destroy the terminal,
**[17:40] Gin**
but you can't break the
terminal in my crotch?
**[17:43] Gin**
You won't take Earth like this!
**[17:45] Gin**
Do you have it in you to break them all?
**[17:49] Gin**
Everyone in this country, from
cabaret girls to robotic ones,
**[17:52] Gin**
has a big terminal in their pants!
**[17:56] Bo**
Like hell we do!
**[17:57] Gin**
D-Due to an unexpected breakdown,
**[18:00] Gin**
this terminal will be suspending
operations for the day.
**[18:04] Shin**
Serves you right.
**[18:05] Kag**
Quit dawdling about!
**[18:07] Kag**
Abandon the damaged facilities!
Evacuate at once!
**[18:10] Shin**
It broke! A problem child's
terminal snapped it in half!
**[18:13] A**
Don't let them escape!
**[18:14] A**
Shoot them dead!
**[18:18] Gen**
You shitheads are finally back!
***SIGN*** Gen
**[18:22] Gen**
I've tuned up all the robots.
**[18:25] Gen**
A planetary war or a One Year War,
I'm fighting with you, Ginnoji.
**[18:29] Gin**
Your Ginnoji's b*lls got stuck in the tracks.
***SIGN*** Ginnoji
**[18:32] Gin**
He's just Ginnji now.
***SIGN*** Ginnji
**[18:34] Gen**
What, you're already out of gas?
**[18:37] Gen**
Do you know how long I've
waited for this moment?
**[18:43] Gen**
The party's only just getting started!
**[18:46] Oto**
Sheesh. This is why men are so hopeless.
**[18:50] Oto**
You've got a look of pure joy on
your face at a time like this.
**[18:54] Oto**
It's like the person you waited
for forever has returned.
**[19:00] Gen**
Shut it, hag. My son doesn't have a perm.
**[19:03] Oto**
I never said anything about your son.
**[19:05] Gen**
And you're one to talk.
**[19:07] Gen**
Your house just got leveled,
but that look on your face...
**[19:10] Oto**
Just so you know, my husband
doesn't look that stupid.
**[19:15] Gen**
Right.
**[19:16] Gen**
But if my son and your husband
were still living in this town,
**[19:22] Gen**
they'd probably have the same
look on their faces as us.
**[19:37] Gen**
Really, this is how the
Kabuki District's gotta be!
**[19:43] A**
What do you knaves think you're doing?!
**[19:46] A**
Do you realize who we are?
**[19:49] A**
We're the Liberation Army, here to
save you from the Tendoshu's clutches!
**[19:55] Sai**
Liberation? Mind your own business.
**[19:58] Sai**
We don't need your help.
**[20:01] Sai**
As you can see...
**[20:02] Ago**
...we've always lived freely!
**[20:05] A**
Wh-What are those monsters?
**[20:07] 73**
You can say some good things
once in a while, Saigo!
**[20:12] 73**
Exactly!
**[20:14] 73**
We're free people of this town of freedom!
**[20:16] 73**
Be it shakin' off the Tendoshu's rule,
**[20:19] 73**
brushin' aside the shady helping
hand of the Liberation Army,
**[20:23] 73**
or goin' to the hospital, we're
free to do whatever we want!
**[20:26] G**
Bro!
**[20:27] G**
That's what you get for trying to compete
with Saigo and jumping from that high!
**[20:30] Shin**
Saigo-san! Katsuo-san!
**[20:33] Sai**
You've really sent the sparks flying, Pako.
**[20:36] Sai**
But I've been waiting for this.
**[20:38] Sai**
The Kabuki District really isn't
complete without morons like you guys.
**[20:42] 73**
You're puttin' us yakuza to
shame with this reckless fight.
**[20:45] 73**
Boss left this town in our hands,
but we're losin' all face here!
**[20:48] Sai**
You're picking a big fight
with the entire universe.
**[20:51] 73**
Got any chance of winnin'?
**[20:53] Gin**
Hell no.
**[20:55] Gin**
Even if we all fight together,
there's no way we can win.
**[21:00] Gin**
That's why we're gonna stop this war.
**[21:02] Gin**
Sure, we'll still have to win a fight anyway,
**[21:07] Gin**
but only a verbal one.
**[21:12] G**
The samurai are revolting?
**[21:14] G**
Are they out of their minds?
**[21:16] G**
Do those apes really think they
can beat the allied forces?
**[21:19] G**
They must have gotten fed up
with the army's pillaging.
**[21:22] G**
I suppose we gave the
soldiers too much leeway.
**[21:25] G**
But this is perfect.
**[21:27] G**
We planned on taking over Earth
after destroying the Agency anyway.
**[21:31] G**
And now we have just cause to
get rid of those annoying apes.
**[21:34] G**
Pardon me.
**[21:35] G**
What is it? We're in the
middle of a meeting here.
**[21:37] G**
An Earth government has sent an envoy.
**[21:40] G**
Government? They still had one of those?
**[21:44] G**
Are they here to apologize?
**[21:45] G**
W-Well...
**[21:47] Sak**
Yikes. That's one hell of a way
ta welcome unarmed guests.
**[21:52] Kat**
Indeed.
**[21:53] Kat**
You're betraying your leader's
lack of magnanimity.
**[21:57] Kat**
Lower your weapons! This is an affront!
**[21:59] Sak**
Who do you think this man is?
**[22:02] Kat**
This is Lord Tokugawa Nobunobu,
shogun of a nation!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:42] Sak**
Even if Earth is in peril,
a trader's gotta do business.
**[23:46] Nbnb**
As representative of Earth's people, there
is something I must discuss with you.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Flavoring Is Best in Small Quantities
**[23:53] SignR**
The shogun, Tokugawa Nobunobu, was supposed to be a bitter enemy.
**[23:53] SignL**
What lies behind his tense expression...
**[23:58] SignR**
Schemes run rampant both on the surface and in space.
**[23:58] SignL**
Even a new character appears.
# 343 - Flavoring Is Best in Small Quantities
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Flavoring Is Best in Small Quantities
**[01:40] Kat**
Utsuro made the Altana reserves of seven
planets go berserk, destroying them.
**[01:45] Kat**
His true goal was to use the Altana
Liberation Army and turn Earth...
**[01:51] Kat**
into space dust.
**[01:53] Kat**
So our job is to...
**[01:55] Kat**
Pass the soy sauce, please.
**[01:57] Sak**
I see. Soy sauce, eh?
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:59] Sak**
And what do we do once
we control the soy sauce?
**[02:02] Kat**
Fire it all at once toward
the croquette, obviously.
**[02:04] Sak**
Zura, trickery only works when
you also use traditional tactics.
**[02:08] Sak**
Croquettes are better with
Worcestershire sauce.
**[02:11] Kat**
A samurai can eat anything as long
as he has salt and soy sauce.
**[02:14] Kat**
It's because you get influenced by foreign
culture and use katakana seasoning
**[02:17] Kat**
that you get called "idiot"
and "moron" in katakana.
**[02:20] Sak**
Zura, croquettes themselves
are written in katakana.
**[02:23] Sak**
Ain't it common sense to use katakana
seasoning on katakana foods?
**[02:27] Kat**
It's not that simple.
**[02:29] Kat**
The katakana Yu Darvish and
his wife Saeko didn't work out,
**[02:32] Kat**
but things worked out great for
Nishikawa Kiyoshi and Helen.
**[02:35] Kat**
The world works in strange ways.
**[02:37] Sak**
As lovey-dovey as Kiyoshi and his wife seem,
they must've had tons of difficulties.
**[02:42] Kat**
No way. It's obvious from Helen's smile.
**[02:44] Sak**
Have you seen Saeko's smile, then?
**[02:47] Kat**
What the hell do you know about Helen?
**[02:49] Sak**
What do *you* know about Saeko's suffering?!
**[02:52] Kat**
Say what?
**[02:53] Shin**
That shtick is particularly irritating
when you consider that Earth is in peril.
**[02:56] Gin**
Right? Makes you wanna destroy Earth, right?
**[02:59] Gin**
Long story short, both Helen
and Saeko did their best.
**[03:02] Gin**
And to save Earth, defeating
Utsuro ain't enough.
**[03:06] Gin**
We also have to stop the war that he started.
**[03:10] Gin**
Let's say...
**[03:11] Gin**
Earth is this croquette, and the maple
syrup on top is the Liberation Army.
**[03:16] Gin**
The pocky stuck in the middle is Utsuro...
**[03:18] Shin**
Uh, the syrup packs too much
punch. I can't follow at all.
**[03:21] Kag**
How confusing. Basically, it's like this.
**[03:25] Kag**
The croquette here is Earth.
**[03:27] Kag**
All the gastric acid attacking
it is the Liberation Army.
**[03:30] Shin**
Pretty sure Earth's done
for here. It's been eaten.
**[03:33] Shin**
Could you stop likening it to a croquette?
***SIGN*** It's like this, right?
**[03:38] Shin**
What the hell did you eat?!
**[03:39] Shin**
That's Korokke the actor, not croquette!
**[03:41] Mut**
That's just how it is.
**[03:43] Mut**
We can't even agree on how to eat croquettes.
**[03:47] Mut**
So we should just eat it however we like,
with whatever seasoning we like.
**[03:50] Mut**
In other words,
**[03:51] Mut**
no different from how it's always been.
**[03:53] Shin**
Even as you say that, your belly's
swollen with croquettes!
**[03:56] Shin**
You really are a Yato, huh?
**[03:59] Sak**
Even if Earth is in peril,
a trader's gotta do business.
**[04:04] Shin**
Business?
**[04:05] Sak**
We're gonna negotiate
with the Liberation Army.
**[04:07] Sak**
For that, we need ta take the
Tendoshu and Utsuro's heads first.
**[04:12] Sak**
We'll sell those heads
to the Liberation Army.
**[04:14] Sak**
In return, we'll buy Earth's future.
**[04:18] Kat**
Will that really stop the war?
**[04:20] Kat**
They're fixated on Earth itself, you know.
**[04:24] Gin**
That's exactly why we have to do it.
**[04:27] Gin**
We have to show the entire universe that
Earthlings have the power to defend Earth from
**[04:34] Gin**
the Tendoshu and the Liberation Army.
**[04:36] Gin**
Or else, Earth doesn't have a future.
**[04:39] Kat**
Even so,
**[04:41] Kat**
is it even possible to bring
them to the negotiating table?
**[04:44] Kat**
Do you really think they'll
listen to nobodies like us?
**[04:51] Nb**
Oh, they will.
**[04:55] Nb**
If they hear that you're not rebels
who turned against the bakufu,
**[04:59] Nb**
but Shogun Tokugawa Nobunobu's official army.
**[05:03] Shin**
Lord Nobunobu?!
**[05:05] Sak**
What's this, Shogun-sama?
**[05:08] Sak**
You're finally willin' to touch
the space food that Gran cooked?
**[05:13] Nb**
Give me another croquette.
**[05:15] G**
Sir!
**[05:16] Nb**
As pathetic as the food may be,
**[05:18] Nb**
one can't fight on an empty stomach.
You're the one who told me that.
**[05:23] Nb**
Take me with you.
**[05:25] Nb**
If you do, the Liberation Army
will treat you as Earth's envoys.
**[05:30] Kag**
You're telling us to become your retainers?!
**[05:32] Kag**
Keep the jokes to your crew cut, okay?!
**[05:35] Shin**
Kagura-chan!
**[05:38] Nb**
A man who became shogun by being
a puppet has no retainers.
**[05:44] Nb**
But even if I'm an empty figurehead,
I can still use the title of shogun.
**[05:49] Nb**
Let me at least choose for myself
my final act as a puppet.
**[05:53] Kat**
After being a puppet all your life,
now you'll willingly choose to act as one?
**[06:00] Kat**
Are you trying to atone for your sins?
**[06:02] Kat**
No matter how hard you try,
we'll never forget what you've done.
**[06:07] Nb**
I won't forget, either.
**[06:09] Nb**
All an empty shogun can do is take in all
of his subjects' sorrow, hatred, and hopes,
**[06:16] Nb**
and watch how things play out until the end.
**[06:21] Nb**
Hey.
**[06:23] Nb**
This is how one is supposed
to eat croquettes, I take it?
**[06:47] G**
Thank you for coming, Shogun-dono.
**[06:50] G**
So, what can we do for you?
**[06:53] Nb**
As representative of Earth's people,
there is something I must discuss with you.
**[07:06] Nb**
Can I use your toilet?
**[07:11] Kat**
* And that was how the first contact between*
* us and the Liberation Army went.*
**[07:15] Kat**
*They really cannot be taken lightly.*
**[07:17] Kat**
*You don't even have to wipe your ass*
**[07:19] Kat**
* with this terrifying technology called*
* "washlet" that they've developed.*
**[07:22] Shin**
What the hell are you guys negotiating?!
**[07:24] Kat**
Because you guys put all sorts
of stuff on his croquettes,
**[07:27] Kat**
it seems he's had an upset
stomach for the past three days.
**[07:30] Shin**
* That doesn't mean that after*
* barging into the enemy's base,*
**[07:33] Shin**
* you borrow their toilet*
* and call it a done deal!*
**[07:34] Kat**
Relax. It wasn't just their
toilet that we borrowed.
***SIGN*** Abarenbo Shogun
**[07:37] Kat**
We also borrowed sweats and underwear.
**[07:39] Shin**
So he pooped his pants after all?
**[07:41] Kat**
We also borrowed In**pendence
Day and S*** Wars.
**[07:45] Shin**
* Why were you at Zudaya?*
* Why were you guys in sweats, too?!*
**[07:47] Kat**
We really can't take the
Liberation Army lightly.
**[07:50] Kat**
They even have lodging facilities
and Zudaya on their mother ship.
**[07:53] Kat**
But we're preparing for tomorrow
by watching S*** Wars.
**[07:56] Kat**
We shan't lose.
**[07:57] Shin**
*You've already lost!*
**[07:58] Shin**
* The moment you decided to prepare using*
* a video you borrowed from the enemy,*
**[08:01] Shin**
*the Earth was doomed!*
**[08:02] Kat**
*The real negotiations start tomorrow.*
**[08:04] Kat**
*Our battle has only just begun.*
**[08:06] Kat**
*How are things on your end?*
**[08:08] Shin**
While you guys were watching S*** Wars,
actual s*** wars broke out over here.
**[08:13] Shin**
In the name of saving Earth,
**[08:15] Shin**
the Liberation Army was looting
and pillaging everything.
**[08:18] Shin**
Citizens all over Edo are
revolting to put an end to this.
**[08:24] 73**
Is this all the Liberation Army's got?
**[08:27] 73**
I thought they'd entertain us, but they
ran away as soon as we poked 'em a little.
**[08:31] 73**
Yuki-chan of the Iai YankWank Pub
I frequent is much more liberatin'.
**[08:37] Sai**
You don't understand a thing.
**[08:40] Sai**
Did you learn nothing from watching Jirocho?
**[08:42] 73**
Boss is a master of iai yanking too, y'know?
**[08:45] Sai**
Shut up.
**[08:46] Kyo**
The Liberation Army must've quickly
retreated because it was their plan all along.
**[08:51] Tet**
Now they can say they're suppressing a riot
and go all-out to take control of Edo.
**[08:56] HB**
*Can't wait.*
***SIGN*** Can't wait. The real fun starts now, huh?
**[08:58] HB**
*The real fun starts now, huh?*
**[09:01] Sai**
In unarmed combat, I don't think
even gods or devils could beat me.
**[09:06] Sai**
But we're up against people who can wipe
out an entire town if they feel like it.
**[09:11] Sai**
They've pummeled me—*the*
Saigo—and Jirocho once already.
**[09:15] Sai**
How are we supposed to beat them?
**[09:19] Gen**
I'll handle the fighting with machines part.
**[09:21] Gen**
You morons can fight your
own moronic battles.
**[09:25] Oto**
This makes me happy.
**[09:26] Oto**
I never thought I'd live long enough
to see another massive fight like this.
**[09:30] Oto**
I'm looking forward to you
guys avenging my husband.
**[09:38] Sai**
The geezers and hags of this town
are scarier than gods or devils!
**[09:42] W**
Everyone,
**[09:43] W**
thanks for keeping watch.
**[09:45] Tae**
We've brought refreshments!
**[09:47] Tae**
Help yourselves—
**[09:50] Shin**
Under the Four Devas' leadership,
**[09:52] Shin**
the Kabuki District is preparing for
the Liberation Army's next move.
**[09:52] Shin**
Come, now, don't be shy. Eat up.
**[09:57] Shin**
As for Kyubei-san and
the rest of the Yagyu...
**[10:00] Kyu**
It doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman.
**[10:03] Kyu**
Those who're capable of
fighting and those who aren't
**[10:05] Kyu**
should both just do everything they can.
**[10:09] Kyu**
If we all come together as one, I'm
sure we can overcome any adversity!
**[10:14] Kyu**
We, the Yagyu Family,
will protect you to the last!
**[10:18] Kyu**
So would you all protect our country with us?
**[10:21] Bin**
How you've grown, Kyubei.
**[10:24] Toj**
Young Master! I'm sure your mother
is watching your heroics in heaven!
**[10:28] G**
We can help! Use us!
**[10:31] W**
Me, too!
**[10:32] W**
And us!
**[10:32] G**
And me!
**[10:34] Kyu**
Thank you. Thank you.
**[10:36] Kyu**
Tha...
**[10:42] Shin**
While calling for the people to rise up,
**[10:44] Shin**
they seem to be trying to
solidify the various groups.
**[10:48] Shin**
And then there's...
**[10:52] Sac**
How's the Liberation Army looking?
**[10:55] G**
Unable to handle the public's
resistance, they've retreated for now.
**[10:59] Sac**
So they're preparing to crush
Edo once and for all.
**[11:03] Sac**
Let all of Edo know and guide
the people to the shelters.
**[11:07] G**
Understood.
**[11:09] Sac**
What about the other thing?
**[11:11] G**
Haven't found him yet.
**[11:12] Sac**
I see.
**[11:14] Sac**
Very well. Dismissed.
**[11:19] Sac**
What is he doing?
**[11:22] Shin**
Sacchan-san and the Oniwaban
**[11:24] Shin**
are keeping an eye on the Liberation Army.
**[11:26] Shin**
Tsukuyo-san and gang are...
**[11:27] G**
No!
**[11:29] G**
I don't wanna be sold to Yoshiwara!
**[11:31] G**
You people are monsters!
**[11:34] G**
Even if you take my body,
you won't have my heart!
**[11:34] Hya**
You don't have to work
here. Just take refuge.
**[11:36] G**
Shut it, fugly!
**[11:37] Hya**
Who're you calling fugly, you hag?!
**[11:39] G**
What's wrong with calling a fugly a fugly?!
**[11:41] Hin**
How ironic.
**[11:43] Hin**
That thick ceiling, which once kept us
Yoshiwara women locked up underground,
**[11:48] Hin**
is now acting as a truly reliable shield.
**[11:51] Hin**
I thought I'd never see
this metallic sky again.
**[11:55] Hin**
It looks completely
different now, doesn't it?
**[11:58] Hin**
Is it because we know we're
connected, even if it's shut?
**[12:02] Hin**
Connected to the skies over
Edo, where everyone is.
**[12:05] Tsu**
Yeah.
**[12:07] Tsu**
So we should fight, too,
**[12:09] Tsu**
along with the ones who live
under the same skies as us.
**[12:15] Shin**
Katsura-san.
**[12:17] Shin**
Make sure the Liberation Army knows
**[12:20] Shin**
that we will never lose.
**[12:34] Shin**
*Katsura-san.*
**[12:35] Shin**
*Make sure the Liberation Army knows*
**[12:38] Shin**
*that we will never lose.*
**[12:44] Shin**
There you have it.
**[12:46] Shin**
These people aren't rioters.
**[12:48] Shin**
Earthlings rose up to stop the Liberation
Army's looting and savagery.
**[12:53] Shin**
If your soldiers back off, so will they.
**[12:56] G**
We were trying to liberate you from
the Tendoshu's rule, you know.
**[13:01] G**
You call that savagery?
**[13:03] Sak**
It was savagery.
**[13:05] Sak**
We samurai prefer ta wipe our own asses
and clean up our own messes.
**[13:08] Sak**
And you stole our prey from us.
**[13:13] G**
You mean to say you'll deal with
the Tendoshu without our help?
**[13:16] G**
Like you can—
**[13:18] Nb**
They can.
**[13:20] Nb**
They put me through hell,
so I know it better than anyone.
**[13:24] Nb**
A word of advice:
**[13:26] Nb**
do not get on their bad side.
**[13:28] Nb**
Also...
**[13:31] Nb**
Can I use your toil—
**[13:34] Sak**
Just clench your butt.
**[13:36] Kat**
This is do-or-die for both Earth and you.
**[13:41] Shu**
Oh?
**[13:43] Shu**
You seem to have a very favorable
opinion of your subjects.
**[13:47] Shu**
But we can't back down, either.
**[13:51] Kat**
Admiral Shijaku.
**[13:53] Kat**
A primary player in the
Liberation Army's formation,
**[13:56] Kat**
and a master of fleet warfare.
**[13:58] Kat**
A big shot has shown up.
**[14:00] Nb**
*A big one's going to show up here, too!*
**[14:03] Shi**
The Tendoshu aren't your
country's problem alone.
**[14:07] Shi**
Many planets that were home to
my comrades here were destroyed.
**[14:11] Shi**
Ending the Agency's long rule
**[14:14] Shi**
and taking back our freedom in this battle
**[14:17] Shi**
is the greatest wish of people all across
the universe, and our biggest challenge.
**[14:21] Shi**
Shouldn't we take one another's
hand and deal with this together?
**[14:28] Shi**
* The Tokugawa Bakufu is a puppet regime*
* that the Tendoshu controlled for ages.*
**[14:33] Shi**
*I thought they'd been rendered spineless.*
**[14:35] Shi**
*I never expected them to come this far.*
**[14:38] Shi**
*But his fear is clear for all to see.*
**[14:41] Shi**
* He can't assert his country's will if it*
* turns the entire universe against them.*
**[14:47] Shi**
*Nobody can.*
**[14:50] Shi**
Can we take your lack of response
as a sign that you accept us?
**[14:58] Nb**
What do you think freedom is?
**[15:00] Nb**
Does the freedom you people seek
**[15:03] Nb**
mean benefiting even if you have to
take away the freedom of other planets?
**[15:08] Nb**
The freedom we samurai seek
is a much higher standard.
**[15:13] Nb**
True freedom is
**[15:17] Nb**
being able to go to the
toilet whenever you want!
**[15:22] Sak**
Poop whenever you want.
**[15:24] Kat**
I have a change of Pampers ready for you.
**[15:28] Shi**
* He's still keeping up his*
* headstrong attitude?*
**[15:33] G**
Does that mean you consider the
Liberation Army your enemie—
**[15:36] Nb**
Enough!
**[15:38] Nb**
Don't make me repeat myself over and over!
**[15:41] Nb**
We'll take down the Tendoshu ourselves.
**[15:44] Nb**
If you want to help, feel free.
**[15:46] Nb**
But if you want to mess with our
country in the name of helping,
**[15:49] Nb**
we'll take you down as well!
**[15:50] Nb**
Okay! That's it! We're done here!
**[15:54] Shi**
* Forget asking for help. He ended*
* the negotiations himself.*
**[15:58] Shi**
* Is it not fear he's showing, then?*
* No, it most definitely is fear.*
**[16:02] Shi**
*But that's...*
**[16:05] Sak**
Not yet.
**[16:06] Kat**
Spew everything here,
and not just from your butt.
**[16:10] Shi**
*That's a fear directed at something else.*
**[16:13] Shi**
Wait, Shogun-dono!
**[16:14] Nb**
Knock it off already!
**[16:17] Nb**
If you keep me here any longer,
**[16:21] Nb**
I just might end up launching it.
**[16:25] G**
L-Launching?!
**[16:27] G**
You!
**[16:28] G**
Y-You couldn't have!
**[16:30] G**
Freeze!
**[16:33] G**
This is all futile. It's too late.
**[16:37] G**
Nobody can stop it anymore. Not even me.
**[16:41] G**
What are you packing?
**[16:43] G**
What are you planning to launch?
**[16:45] G**
Time-based missiles?
Interplanetary ballistic missiles?
**[16:48] G**
Answer!
**[16:49] Kat**
*Nope.*
**[16:50] Sak**
*It's poop.*
**[16:51] Nb**
The ones who forced me to do this
**[16:55] Nb**
were none other than you lot!
**[16:57] Shi**
Calm down, everyone.
**[16:59] G**
Admiral.
**[17:00] Shi**
So that's what you were so afraid of.
**[17:03] Shi**
You planned on using it as
your trump card all along?
**[17:07] Nb**
I sent you several warning signs.
**[17:10] Nb**
Not my fault you lot didn't notice them.
**[17:13] Shi**
So it was an ace in the hole you
would've preferred not to use?
**[17:17] Shi**
What will happen if it's launched?
**[17:20] Shi**
Is the target this S.S. Heavenly Bird?
**[17:22] Nb**
Isn't that obvious? It's simple.
**[17:26] Nb**
No amount of asswiping will ever clear
the disgrace it'll bring my name.
**[17:29] Nb**
And future generations won't ever forget it.
**[17:31] G**
* A weapon that'll even affect*
* future generations?*
**[17:34] G**
*It must be...*
**[17:36] Bo**
*A nuke!*
**[17:37] Kat**
*Nope.*
**[17:38] Sak**
*It's poop.*
**[17:39] G**
I-Impossible!
**[17:40] G**
We thoroughly investigated the ships they
arrived in! They're still under watch!
**[17:44] G**
The Army should have control
of Earth's main weapons, too.
**[17:46] G**
Where did you keep something
like that hidden?
**[17:49] Nb**
Three minutes until launch.
**[17:51] Nb**
One, two, three...
**[17:55] Nb**
Run away from here immediately!
**[17:58] G**
Is it inside his stomach?
**[18:00] Shi**
I've heard that Earth samurai
have weapons in their bellies.
**[18:05] Nb**
Fifteen, sixteen, seventeen...
**[18:05] Shi**
Apparently, that weapon they're prepared
to die to use is as powerful as a nuke.
**[18:11] Shi**
I see.
**[18:13] Shi**
So this is the samurai's lethal weapon,
**[18:16] Shi**
disembowelment!
**[18:17] Kat**
*Nope.*
**[18:18] Sak**
*It's a bowel movement.*
**[18:19] G**
Disembowelment? Wh-What is that?
**[18:23] Shi**
I don't know exactly,
but guessing from his stance,
**[18:27] Shi**
it's a weapon that converts whatever's
in his stomach into energy
**[18:30] Shi**
and fires it out of his butt.
**[18:33] Kat**
*Uh, that's pretty much...*
**[18:35] Sak**
*It's poop.*
**[18:36] G**
How can we stop it?
**[18:38] Shi**
I don't know how exactly,
**[18:40] Shi**
but taking in fiber and the
like to clear the bowels
**[18:45] Shi**
should mitigate its impact.
**[18:47] Kat**
*Uh, that's exactly...*
**[18:49] Sak**
*It's poop.*
**[18:50] G**
I-It's a bluff!
**[18:52] G**
No way can he launch something as powerful
as a nuke from this stupid pose.
**[18:56] G**
Seize him!
**[18:57] Nb**
No!
**[18:58] Nb**
Not there!
**[19:02] G**
J-Just getting close made them...
**[19:04] G**
It's the real deal!
**[19:05] G**
It's a real disembowelment!
**[19:07] Shi**
Evacuate at once!
**[19:09] Shi**
Issue a level one alarm!
**[19:11] Shi**
Get away from S.S. Heavenly
Bird at full speed!
**[19:17] G**
A-Admiral?
**[19:18] G**
What are you doing?
**[19:19] Shi**
Hurry up and go.
**[19:21] Shi**
I cannot abandon my ship.
**[19:23] G**
Admiral!
**[19:25] Shi**
It seems I underestimated you earthlings.
**[19:29] Shi**
I never expected you to be prepared to
kill yourself for these negotiations.
**[19:33] Shi**
Your resolve was splendid.
**[19:36] Shi**
I was lacking in proper etiquette.
**[19:38] Shi**
When someone risks their
life to challenge you,
**[19:41] Shi**
my planet's etiquette dictates that you
must respond by risking your own life.
**[19:45] Shi**
I too shall risk my life
**[19:49] Shi**
to put an end to this pointless conflict.
**[19:52] Shi**
The real negotiations start now!
**[19:57] G**
Is that a counter-disembowelment?
**[19:58] G**
What the heck is a counter-disembowelment?
**[20:00] G**
I don't know exactly, but
when the enemy fires his,
**[20:03] G**
he'll probably fire his own
disembowelment to neutralize it.
**[20:06] G**
Can the admiral really use disembowelment?
**[20:09] G**
I don't know, but...
**[20:11] Shi**
*Whoa!*
**[20:13] Shi**
* I feel like I can release*
* something right now!*
**[20:16] Shi**
*Is this... Is this...*
**[20:20] Kat**
*Nope.*
**[20:21] Sak**
*It's poop.*
**[20:36] G**
Admiral?
**[20:37] G**
What's the matter, Admiral?
**[20:39] G**
What happened?
**[20:42] Shi**
Uh, can I ask you something?
**[20:46] Shi**
What exactly is disembowelment?
**[20:50] Nb**
Dunno.
**[20:51] Shi**
Of course you don't!
**[20:52] Shi**
I knew all along! There's no
way it could've been true!
**[20:57] Shi**
Well, the guys don't seem
to have realized yet,
**[21:01] Shi**
so please don't tell them, okay?
**[21:04] Nb**
Very well. But in return...
**[21:07] Shi**
I know. I'll talk to the others
and make the negotiations easier.
**[21:12] Nb**
No, before that...
**[21:14] KatSak**
Could you let him use your toilet?
**[21:22] KatSak**
Go dump as much as you want.
**[21:30] Kat**
* These negotiations temporarily softened*
* the Liberation Army's stance.*
***SIGN*** Well done.
**[21:35] Kat**
*A peaceful resolution to the riots*
**[21:37] Kat**
* and greater discipline from the*
* army were among the promises made,*
**[21:40] Kat**
* but we couldn't get them to withdraw*
* their troops stationed on Earth.*
**[21:44] Kat**
*But our biggest gain this time*
**[21:47] Kat**
* might be the reliable friend we*
* made in the Liberation Army.*
**[21:52] Shi**
Don't tell anyone.
***SIGN*** Abarenbo Admiral
**[21:53] Nb**
Right back at you.
***SIGN*** Abarenbo Shogun
**[21:54] Shi**
It's a promise, okay?
**[21:56] Nb**
You keep your promise too, okay?
**[21:58] Kat**
*That's about it.*
**[21:59] Kat**
* We couldn't stop the war, but it*
* wasn't bad for a first meeting.*
**[22:03] Kat**
*Well? How'd you like our negotiation skills?*
**[22:08] Shin**
Uh, it was poop.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:44] Shi**
That's a real disembowelment, huh?
**[23:48] Gin**
If we don't defeat them, this will never end.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** A Delinquent's Kid Has Long Neck Hair
***SIGN*** Sorry it was
***SIGN*** pretty much poop.
***SIGN*** Next time, the biggest fish, Utsuro, shows up.
***SIGN*** Another new character appears, too.
# 344 - A Delinquent's Kid Has Long Neck Hair
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] Shi**
*I know you must be homesick this time.*
**[00:10] Shi**
* I hear your wife back home*
* is close to giving birth.*
**[00:14] Shi**
* If you have the time to engage in particle*
* cannon fire with neighboring countries,*
**[00:18] Shi**
* why don't you stay by your wife*
* and do Lamaze with her?*
**[00:21] Shi**
* Or is the mighty hero of war*
* afraid of becoming a father?*
**[00:27] Shi**
*How about it, Gunpowder Prince Ensho?*
**[00:31] En**
Shijaku, in Military Empire Burei,
**[00:35] En**
custom says a man who returns empty-handed
from war cannot be a father.
**[00:38] En**
His wife will kick his ass and
send him back to the battlefield.
**[00:43] En**
My wife is fighting, too.
**[00:45] En**
I was told that we're competing to see
which of us can claim victory sooner.
**[00:49] Shi**
* Then, as your archrival, I must fight*
* in a manner befitting your resolve.*
**[00:54] En**
Archrival? As if.
**[00:57] En**
Your head will be nothing more than
a nice toy for my child to play with.
**[01:00] G**
Prince!
**[01:01] G**
We've received word from Burei.
**[01:04] Shi**
*It seems your wife emerged victorious.*
**[01:09] Shi**
*What's the matter, Ensho?*
**[01:15] G**
The Empire's Altana Gate went out of control.
**[01:20] G**
The cause was likely man-made.
**[01:23] G**
The Imperial Capital has been destroyed.
**[01:25] G**
Nobody survived.
**[01:34] En**
For the first time, I fled from war
and came back empty-handed.
**[01:38] En**
But the one who would chastise me
for that was nowhere to be found.
**[01:44] En**
Why did you sit back and let me escape?
**[01:47] En**
Why didn't you take this
chance to attack my empire?
**[01:50] Shi**
Like I said,
**[01:52] Shi**
I must fight in a manner befitting
the Gunpowder Prince's archrival.
**[01:57] Shi**
And I realized that the enemy isn't in
the neighboring countries, but elsewhere.
**[02:02] En**
The Gunpowder Prince?
**[02:04] En**
You still call me that
after I've lost my empire?
**[02:08] Shi**
Ensho...
**[02:10] Shi**
You didn't come back empty-handed.
**[02:14] Shi**
You've gained a comrade to fight
the Tendoshu's unjust rule with.
**[02:21] En**
Even after losing my empire,
**[02:23] En**
I still belong on the battlefield?
**[02:27] En**
Then from that battlefield,
**[02:29] En**
from within the gunpowder
smoke, let us seize it all!
**[02:33] En**
Seize our freedom!
**[02:34] En**
We, the Altana Liberation Army, shall
liberate the universe from the Tendoshu!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** A Delinquent's Kid Has Long Neck Hair
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
***SIGN*** Shimura Ken
**[04:25] Shin**
I knew it.
**[04:27] Shin**
You were here, Sis.
**[04:31] Shin**
It isn't safe to walk around alone right now.
**[04:34] Tae**
But that's exactly why.
**[04:36] Shin**
Are you going to tell Father
that Earth will be destroyed?
***SIGN*** Shimura Ken
**[04:42] Tae**
Yeah.
**[04:43] Tae**
"Earth could be destroyed."
**[04:46] Tae**
"But your crybaby son,
my unreliable kid brother,
**[04:52] Tae**
hasn't shed a single tear and is
fighting along with everyone."
**[04:58] Tae**
"Shimura Shinpachi has grown
into a fine samurai."
**[05:04] Shin**
Sis, I haven't changed at all.
**[05:09] Shin**
I just blindly chased after the back of
the strange samurai I saw back then.
**[05:14] Shin**
I kept chasing after it,
**[05:17] Shin**
and I was here before I knew it.
**[05:20] Shin**
All that stuff about saving Earth or
protecting Edo is really beyond me.
**[05:25] Shin**
It's not that I changed.
**[05:28] Shin**
I *didn't* want to change.
**[05:30] Shin**
I just wanted to stay by the strange
samurai and his friends forever.
**[05:36] Shin**
Do you think Father will forgive me for
wielding my sword for such a reason?
**[05:43] Tae**
Shin-chan, you don't have
to ask for forgiveness.
**[05:47] Tae**
You're now capable of finding
all the answers for yourself.
**[05:52] Tae**
You now stand side-by-side with the
back you blindly chased all this time.
**[05:56] Tae**
And if you want to protect that,
**[06:01] Tae**
I'm sure Father feels the same way.
**[06:04] Tae**
He's watching over you
**[06:09] Tae**
from right beside you.
**[06:15] G**
Get a load of them.
**[06:16] G**
They're still walking around here.
**[06:19] G**
Damn Amanto. Get off this planet already.
**[06:22] Cat**
Say what? You were pissing your pants
in front of the Liberation Army!
**[06:26] Cat**
But you grow balls when you're up
against women and children, huh?
**[06:29] G**
That was a woman? I thought
it was an old man.
**[06:32] Kag**
You heard 'em.
**[06:33] Tam**
Please don't lump Kagura-sama
in with the Liberation Army!
**[06:36] Tam**
She has the power to destroy Earth
before them if she so wishes!
**[06:41] Kag**
Uh, you're not helping, 'kay?
**[06:46] Cat**
What's going on?
**[06:48] Tam**
Even though there are Amanto
who side with earthlings,
**[06:52] Tam**
the discrimination only
grows worse by the day.
**[06:55] Cat**
Maybe it'd be best to abandon
this stupid planet and bail.
**[07:00] Cat**
Even if Earth does survive, there
may not be a place for us here.
**[07:07] Kag**
I never had a place here anyway.
**[07:10] Kag**
I was just an unwanted guest squatting in
a tiny space that I pried open for myself.
**[07:14] Kag**
But before I knew it, those guys
were squatting in my space.
**[07:21] Kag**
They shamelessly made themselves
at home without even paying any rent.
**[07:26] Kag**
Turns out I was the one with unwanted guests.
**[07:30] Tam**
Maybe that's what you call a real home.
***SIGN*** Snack Oto
**[07:34] Tam**
Even if you lose your house or your planet,
**[07:38] Tam**
that place alone will remain
strong and await your return.
**[07:42] Tam**
It exists within us as well...
**[07:44] Tam**
A place for you and everyone else to return.
**[07:50] Cat**
Just know that my rent's higher
than Otose-san's, though.
**[07:55] Tam**
Same here.
**[07:57] Kag**
That so?
**[07:59] Kag**
Then I guess we'll all have to go
out and earn that rent money.
**[08:04] Tam**
Indeed.
**[08:07] Kag**
But thanks to that, I can go
wild until Edo is flattened.
**[08:14] Shin**
*The crucial battle was upon us.*
**[08:17] Shin**
* While the Liberation Army*
* isn't making any moves...*
**[08:20] Kag**
*...we must find the Tendoshu...*
**[08:22] Shin**
*...and defeat Utsuro.*
**[08:24] Kag**
*Or else this planet has no future.*
**[08:27] Shin**
* Gin-san suddenly went missing,*
* and I'm worried about what he's up to.*
**[08:31] Shin**
*I hope he's hit upon some kind of idea.*
**[08:39] Gin**
What? They're making a second
live-action *Gintama* movie?
**[08:43] Gin**
I had no idea this was decided
while I was out in space.
**[08:47] Gin**
"Oguri Shun returns in the
role of Sakata Gintoki"?
**[08:50] Gin**
Well, he barely passed with his long legs,
**[08:53] Gin**
but they could've gone for a cute
Johnny's idol for Gin-san, too—
**[08:58] Gin**
Ow... What do you guys think
you're doing to Oguri Shun's jaw?
**[08:58] [SONG] Sign**
Ueda Bookstore
**[09:01] Gin**
Do you realize how many billions
this jaw's gonna bring in again?
**[09:04] Shin**
You're not Oguri Shun!
**[09:05] Shin**
We thought you were looking for
the Tendoshu! What are you doing?
**[09:08] Gin**
Oh, shut it.
**[09:09] Gin**
Even you ignored Earth last week
and were Granbluing on a rooftop!
**[09:13] (Flashback) Shin**
Granblue...
**[09:15] Shin**
I wasn't Granbluing!
**[09:17] Shin**
Even Granblue Masaki isn't
making those ads anymore!
**[09:21] Shin**
Sadaharu!
**[09:24] Gin**
Oh, you're back? I've been waiting.
**[09:26] Shin**
Gin-san, don't tell me...
**[09:27] Gin**
To find the Tendoshu,
we gotta investigate the bakufu.
**[09:31] Gin**
They may hide, but they
can't fool a dog's nose.
**[09:35] Shin**
Look, he has something in his mouth.
**[09:41] Shin**
Er, this is...
**[09:43] Gin**
Jean-Claude...
**[09:45] Sad**
Wan!
**[09:45] Gin**
...Damme, huh?
**[09:49] Shin**
He's just requesting an actor!
**[09:51] Shin**
You weren't satisfied with the CG?
**[09:53] Shin**
You want Van Damme to play you?
You want him to be Wan Damme?
**[09:56] Shin**
Don't give me that!
**[09:58] Shin**
Do you realize how many billions
that "wan" is gonna cost us?!
**[10:00] [SONG] Sign**
Ueda Bookstore
**[10:00] Shin**
Knock it off! Earth really will be destroyed!
**[10:10] Gin**
What's this? You guys
wanna request actors, too?
**[10:14] Gin**
Sorry, but these days, they can add as
many extras as they want with just CG—
**[10:17] Shin**
Wait, Gin-san!
**[10:19] Shin**
These people...
**[10:26] Shin**
What's going on?
**[10:27] Kag**
After the Liberation Army,
we're fighting the public?
**[10:30] Gin**
Nah, these guys aren't ordinary folk.
**[10:34] Gin**
Ack! They're coming from the front, too!
**[10:44] Nob**
Took you long enough.
**[10:46] Nob**
I'd grown sick of waiting.
**[10:47] Shin**
Nobume-san!
**[10:48] Nob**
No. I'll take someone like
Kuriyama Chiaki, please.
**[10:51] Shin**
You too?!
**[10:53] Nob**
By the way, those masses
**[11:01] Nob**
aren't who you think.
**[11:03] Gin**
Naraku?
**[11:07] Gin**
Why are they disguised as townsfolk?
**[11:12] G**
How long do we gotta twiddle our thumbs here?
**[11:16] G**
Admiral Shijaku's orders.
**[11:18] G**
He told us not to act unless
the earthlings attack.
**[11:21] G**
The brass wanna take over
this planet too, right?
**[11:24] G**
Then why wait around...
**[11:30] G**
Hey, what's wrong?
**[11:32] G**
Did a fish bite your dick?
**[11:37] G**
H-Hey!
**[11:43] Nob**
It's time
**[11:45] Nob**
for the beginning of the end.
**[11:52] Nob**
Utsuro's planet busting is about to start.
**[11:57] G**
Have you lost your minds?
**[11:59] G**
You're picking a fight with us?
**[12:01] G**
Did you come here to die?
**[12:03] Uts**
Precisely.
**[12:07] Uts**
I am here to die...
**[12:09] Uts**
Along with you all
**[12:12] Uts**
and this planet.
**[12:23] Zen**
Not exactly a great view.
**[12:26] Zen**
Watching a country crumble from atop
an empty castle doesn't feel good.
**[12:33] G**
What's going on?
**[12:34] G**
Just when the Liberation Army finally
calms down, now the masses are rioting?
**[12:39] G**
That is why I said to keep watch on
them so they don't do anything stupid!
**[12:44] G**
And who was going to do that?
**[12:45] G**
Everyone ignored this national
crisis and ran off somewhere!
**[12:48] G**
Nobody even shows up to the meetings!
**[12:50] G**
Even if everyone showed up,
would anyone here be of use?
**[12:53] G**
What was that? I shall cut you down!
**[12:56] G**
Take responsibility and cut yourself first!
**[12:59] G**
The earthlings did what?
**[13:01] G**
An unidentified unit has
attacked our base on Earth.
**[13:05] G**
We're fighting back, but they've
already sunk two of our battleships.
**[13:08] G**
We've lost many men, too.
**[13:10] G**
This is bad.
**[13:12] G**
You're the one who oversaw the
riots and withdrew our troops,
**[13:16] G**
Admiral Shijaku.
**[13:21] (Flashback) Nb**
I'm sorry to ask so much of you.
**[13:26] (Flashback) Nb**
But if you will stop your men, I promise
to bring you the Tendoshu's heads.
**[13:32] (Flashback) Nb**
If I can't keep that promise, I'm
prepared to offer you my head as shogun.
**[13:37] (Flashback) Shi**
Is that what "disembowelment" truly means?
**[13:41] (Flashback) Shi**
Do you have a chance of winning, though?
**[13:43] (Flashback) Sak**
If we don't take back our freedom
with our own hands, it's pointless.
**[13:49] (Flashback) Sak**
Besides, that's when our
battle will truly begin.
**[13:53] (Flashback) Sak**
Now that the Tendoshu's rule has weakened,
**[13:56] (Flashback) Sak**
Altana has become a symbol of freedom
that can destroy an entire planet.
**[14:00] (Flashback) Sak**
And we'll all end up attainin' it.
**[14:03] (Flashback) Sak**
If we succumb under the
pressure of that "freedom,"
**[14:06] (Flashback) Sak**
only destruction will await us in the future.
**[14:09] (Flashback) Sak**
You and we both must fight...
**[14:15] (Flashback) Sak**
Fight freedom and ourselves.
**[14:20] Shi**
As they spoke those words, the look
in their eyes wasn't that of puppets.
**[14:25] Shi**
This incident couldn't have
been caused by earthlings.
**[14:29] Shi**
It's a trap laid by one who wishes to use
the tensions between us to expand the war.
**[14:34] G**
You're the one who fell for a trap! How
could you let those apes talk you into...
**[14:38] En**
You don't get it.
**[14:39] En**
This universal war itself may be
a trap laid by the Tendoshu.
**[14:45] En**
That's what that man is saying.
**[14:48] En**
If you want someone to blame,
blame me for starting this war.
**[14:53] G**
Prince Ensho...
**[14:54] Shi**
I didn't say that.
**[14:57] Shi**
Both your appearance and
your words lack subtlety.
**[15:00] En**
Look who's talking. You're former
royalty who is acting as a mercenary.
**[15:05] Shi**
Don't lump me in with you.
**[15:08] Shi**
I cast away my homeland and my royalty
and gave all I had to the battlefield.
**[15:13] Shi**
I rose up with you all because
I felt this war had just cause.
**[15:18] Shi**
But those earthlings said that
**[15:20] Shi**
freedom without responsibility
would only lead to destruction.
**[15:25] Shi**
Ensho, it may be our responsibility
to stop this war.
**[15:31] G**
What? Stop this war?!
**[15:34] En**
Is the situation that grave, Shijaku?
**[15:38] En**
Are you saying the Tendoshu destroyed
those planets in a bid to start this war?
**[15:47] En**
Do you mean they're trying to
make the world self-destruct?
**[15:56] Shi**
Ensho, I've arranged a secret meeting.
**[15:59] Shi**
At this point, we cannot resolve this
situation without their cooperation.
**[16:03] Shi**
You can hear the details
straight from their mouths.
**[16:08] En**
Is that so?
**[16:09] En**
Actually, there's someone I wish
to introduce to you in secret, too.
**[16:13] Shi**
Introduce to me? Who is it?
**[16:16] En**
Do you remember the day when I first
turned tail from the battlefield?
**[16:22] En**
That day, I swore to take down the
Tendoshu, who took everything from me,
**[16:29] En**
and take their heads to my
wife and child no matter what.
**[16:35] En**
Everyone gathered here is like me.
**[16:38] En**
They had their countries or
families taken from them,
**[16:40] En**
swore revenge, and started this war.
**[16:44] En**
If it were to end here, what do you think
is to become of their smoldering hatred?
**[16:50] En**
Where will all our sorrow go?
**[16:54] Shi**
Ensho...
**[16:56] En**
A recon team sent to Earth found
a shipwreck one month ago.
**[17:01] En**
The investigation revealed it to
belong to a certain group of people.
**[17:13] En**
Shijaku, this war cannot end.
**[17:17] En**
Because...
**[17:21] En**
It's already over.
**[17:24] En**
Let me introduce you.
**[17:26] En**
They are our archenemies, the Tendoshu.
**[17:31] Shi**
I-Impossible! What happened to them?
**[17:34] En**
They're alive.
**[17:35] En**
Or, well, perhaps it'd be better
to say that they cannot die.
**[17:38] Shi**
If the Tendoshu are in this state,
who is attacking our base?
**[17:43] En**
It doesn't matter who,
**[17:45] En**
as long as they're enemies who are
willing to be targets for our hate.
**[17:48] Shi**
Ensho, you...
**[17:52] En**
Shijaku,
**[17:53] En**
the Liberation Army needs an enemy.
**[17:57] En**
If everything is already over,
there won't be an end for us.
**[18:01] En**
In that case, the war simply need not end.
**[18:04] En**
That way...
**[18:11] En**
We can keep fighting.
**[18:17] En**
We can keep hating.
**[18:20] En**
I can stay on the battlefield.
**[18:24] En**
Throw him in a cell.
**[18:26] En**
And tell our troops
**[18:29] En**
that we will crush the
rioters and take over Earth.
**[18:35] Gin**
That's Utsuro's plan?
**[18:38] Gin**
He wants to use the Liberation Army
to engulf Edo in the flames of war?
**[18:42] Nob**
And also to eliminate you
people who stand in his way.
**[18:47] Shin**
Does that mean Katsura-san and the
others' negotiations were all in vain?
**[18:50] Nob**
We knew things would come to this eventually.
**[18:53] Nob**
Utsuro isn't the only one who wants a war.
**[18:57] Nob**
And they aren't the only ones who
must fight to obtain an ending.
**[19:01] Gin**
Please don't tell me that includes you.
**[19:04] Nob**
Who knows? At the very least,
I'm thankful for this situation.
**[19:08] Nob**
I finally caught a glimpse
of the elusive Utsuro's tail.
**[19:12] Nob**
If he was to show up anywhere,
**[19:16] Nob**
it'd be here, the most dangerous
and hard-to-crack spot.
**[19:22] Shin**
The Liberation Army's troops
have been wiped out!
**[19:25] Kag**
Not just them. The Naraku, too.
**[19:28] Shin**
They fought to the death
to take down the enemy?
**[19:30] Nob**
To Utsuro, there are no allies
or enemies. Only tools.
**[19:35] Gin**
Looks like I'm just like you, too.
**[19:40] Gin**
If I don't fight...
**[19:42] Gin**
If I don't defeat him,
**[19:44] Gin**
there's no ending for me.
**[19:46] Gin**
Not unless I take you out!
**[19:49] Nb**
What is the meaning of this?
**[19:52] En**
If you're the kind of foolish
leader who can't understand that,
**[19:55] En**
it is understandable that
your country would fall.
**[19:58] En**
You earthlings are the ones who ignored
our ceasefire and took aim at us first.
**[20:04] En**
Die, together with the Tendoshu.
**[20:07] Sak**
I see.
**[20:08] Sak**
If you're the kind of foolish leader who
can't understand the Tendoshu set that up,
**[20:12] Sak**
your army will die, too.
**[20:15] Sak**
But if you're doin' this while fully aware
of that, there's still hope for you.
**[20:20] Sak**
Surrender before the samurai
unsheathe their swords.
**[20:24] En**
I see Shijaku was right. You have guts
and a way with words, if nothing else.
**[20:30] En**
But rest assured.
**[20:32] En**
There won't be a war.
**[20:37] En**
It'll all be over before you can
look up at the sky and blink.
**[20:42] En**
This is but a ritual sacrifice.
**[20:46] En**
Those sticks you call swords
**[20:49] En**
won't reach anywhere.
**[21:00] Gin**
Th-These guys... Could they be...
**[21:04] Shin**
Immortal?
**[21:06] Gin**
Utsuro, you bastard.
You gave them your blood?
**[21:09] Uts**
Yes, although they are fakes
made using a few drops.
**[21:15] Uts**
Is it painful?
**[21:16] Uts**
But that too will end soon.
**[21:20] Uts**
It's all too late. For everything.
**[21:22] Uts**
Will you withdraw your sword and
wait to die with the planet,
**[21:26] Uts**
or will you use it to fight
me and die right here?
**[21:30] Uts**
You're free to choose.
**[21:34] Gin**
Then...
**[21:36] Gin**
I'll use this sword to crush both
you and the Liberation Army!
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:12] Nob**
I'll secure an escape route. Run away.
**[23:14] Zen**
This country's done for.
**[23:17] Zen**
You only have one job now.
**[23:19] Gin**
The guy in front of me
is nothing but a villain.
***SIGN*** The Line Between Tenacious
and Annoying Is Paper-Thin
***SIGN*** While messing around a little bit
***SIGN*** and getting in trouble a little bit...
***SIGN*** Next time,
***SIGN*** it's finally their turn...?!
# 345 - The Line Between Tenacious and Annoying Is Paper-Thin
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[00:07] Uts**
While an "ending" is a conclusion,
it is also a release.
**[00:12] Uts**
Through an ending, we will be
freed of all that shackles us.
**[00:18] Uts**
Such as the endless cycle of foolish wars,
**[00:21] Uts**
or the sorrow and suffering they cause.
**[00:25] Uts**
And still, Sakata Gintoki,
you stand your ground there?
**[00:30] Uts**
You reject an ending and choose
to continue suffering...
**[00:34] Uts**
You choose the suffering of
striking your teacher down?
**[00:38] Uts**
Then I must make my own choice.
**[00:42] Uts**
To choose the suffering of
striking my disciple down.
**[00:47] Nob**
That's...
**[00:48] Nob**
The third and last of the Three
Wings of Naraku, Hitsugi!
**[01:04] Gin**
Teacher? Disciple?
**[01:06] Gin**
That crap doesn't exist here.
**[01:10] Gin**
The guy in front of me
is nothing but a villain.
**[01:15] Gin**
And the guy in front of you
**[01:17] Gin**
is nothing but Odd Jobs!
**[01:28] Gin**
You took his blood, too?
**[01:50] Shin**
There's no end to them!
**[02:13] Nob**
Time's up, huh?
**[02:15] Nob**
I'll secure an escape route. Run away.
**[02:18] Nob**
We can't fight both Utsuro and the
Liberation Army at the same time.
**[02:22] Nob**
I'm sorry. I didn't think things through.
**[02:25] Nob**
That immortal man and his immortal army
**[02:30] Nob**
can't be defeated by us alone right now.
**[02:41] Uts**
It won't reach.
**[03:03] Uts**
It can't reach.
**[03:11] Uts**
Your sword...
**[03:13] Uts**
can't reach me.
**[03:16] Gin**
Utsuro!
**[03:31] Gin**
Utsuro...
**[03:34] Nob**
Hurry!
**[04:13] Kag**
Your glasses broke.
**[04:16] Shin**
I hope what I'm seeing right now is
a mistake caused by my glasses, too.
**[04:21] Shin**
But unfortunately, it looks like my glasses
weren't the only thing that broke.
**[04:32] Shin**
Gin-san!
**[04:33] Kag**
Nobutas!
**[04:37] Nob**
Hurry up and stop Utsuro
and the Liberation Army.
**[04:41] Nob**
Forget about me.
**[04:44] Gin**
We both did stuff we normally wouldn't.
**[04:47] Nob**
I just didn't want to watch
our prospects get any worse.
**[04:52] Gin**
Then keep this in mind:
**[04:55] Gin**
In our eyes, you're a valuable
part of our prospects, too,
**[05:01] Gin**
Mimawarigumi Vice Chief Imai Nobume.
**[05:04] Gin**
We need you to put in your
chief's share of the work.
**[05:08] Gin**
Don't you dare drop dead here.
**[05:11] Gin**
He'll laugh in your face.
**[05:15] Nob**
I'm sure he already is.
**[05:19] Nob**
Isaburo, even in a world without you,
it seems I still have a purpose.
**[05:27] Nob**
But I don't know...
**[05:29] Nob**
You entrusted your hopes to them,
**[05:32] Nob**
but I don't know how to protect
them from that huge evil.
**[05:38] Nob**
I don't know how to protect Edo, which has
lost both its elite and hooligan cops.
**[05:45] G**
Target has been silenced
by concentrated fire.
**[05:48] G**
No signs of any enemies remaining.
**[05:51] En**
*What are you saying?*
**[05:53] En**
*The enemy's still there.*
**[06:00] En**
*Burn everything to the ground.*
**[06:04] G**
We're done for!
**[06:05] G**
This is why I said we
should surrender at once!
**[06:09] G**
But to surrender while Nobunobu-sama
was in the midst of negotiating with them?
**[06:14] G**
We can't believe in a figurehead shogun!
**[06:16] G**
I'm sure he has long abandoned
this country and fled!
**[06:20] G**
If we waste time here, we'll end
up dying with the country, too!
**[06:27] Soyo**
Go ahead and flee.
**[06:30] Soyo**
No need to worry about the country.
**[06:33] Soyo**
I'll watch over the castle
while everybody's gone.
**[06:36] G**
P-Princess Soyo.
**[06:39] Momo**
Princess Soyo did what?
**[06:42] Momo**
Why didn't you keep a closer eye on her?
I repeatedly told you to take utmost care.
**[06:46] G**
We're terribly sorry.
**[06:48] G**
We couldn't really follow her into the
bathroom, and she took that chance.
**[06:52] Momo**
Find her at once.
**[06:54] All**
Ma'am!
**[06:57] (Flashback) Zen**
This country's done for.
**[07:00] (Flashback) Zen**
You only have one job now.
**[07:03] (Flashback) Zen**
Run away, Princess Soyo.
**[07:06] (Flashback) Zen**
Edo'll be engulfed in the flames of war soon.
**[07:09] (Flashback) Zen**
Arrange a ship that'll get
you off of Earth immediately.
**[07:13] (Flashback) Soyo**
Zenzo-san, I want to fight alongside you all.
**[07:18] (Flashback) Soyo**
After all, I am his...
**[07:20] (Flashback) Soyo**
Shogun Tokugawa Shigeshige's sister.
**[07:24] (Flashback) Zen**
You're not the shogun's sister anymore.
**[07:27] (Flashback) Mai**
Watch your mouth, Zenzo-dono!
**[07:30] (Flashback) Zen**
You're just a sister, and it's your duty
to live your brother's share of life.
**[07:34] (Flashback) Zen**
And as the one who failed
to protect your brother,
**[07:38] (Flashback) Zen**
it's my duty to protect you to the end.
**[07:41] (Flashback) Soyo**
What happened to Brother wasn't your fault.
**[07:43] (Flashback) Zen**
Forget it.
**[07:45] (Flashback) Zen**
If you're going to throw a tantrum, I'll
drag you away even if I have to spank you.
***SIGN*** Dumplings
**[07:49] (Flashback) Momo**
Oh? And then what?
**[07:52] (Flashback) Momo**
Will you live in a land with no familiar
faces, counting all the friends you've lost?
**[07:58] (Flashback) Momo**
Zenzo, using your life to make up for
failing your friend is all well and good.
**[08:02] (Flashback) Momo**
But don't forget that you have other friends
here who are doing their best to live.
**[08:08] (Flashback) Zen**
Jump is the only friend I have.
**[08:11] (Flashback) Momo**
And Bessatsu Margaret is my only friend.
***SIGN*** Bessatsu Margaret
**[08:15] (Flashback) Momo**
But here's how I feel.
**[08:16] (Flashback) Momo**
Living a lost friend's share of life
**[08:20] (Flashback) Momo**
and fighting and dying with your
friends who are still alive
**[08:24] (Flashback) Momo**
are both fine displays of friendship.
**[08:28] (Flashback) Soyo**
Zenzo-san, he's fighting, isn't he?
**[08:32] (Flashback) Soyo**
Then I... We must fight, too.
**[08:35] (Flashback) Soyo**
We must struggle and crawl out of
the depths of sorrow and hatred.
**[08:41] (Flashback) Soyo**
We can't be outdone!
**[08:43] (Flashback) Soyo**
Not by him!
**[08:46] (Flashback) Zen**
That so? Got it.
**[08:50] (Flashback) Momo**
Where are you going?
**[08:51] (Flashback) Zen**
If the princess is staying back,
then I won't be of any use by her side.
**[08:56] (Flashback) Zen**
Take care of her, Momochi.
**[08:59] (Flashback) Soyo**
Zenzo-san!
**[09:00] (Flashback) Zen**
I'm gonna do what I want,
so you do as you please, too.
**[09:04] (Flashback) Zen**
Not as a princess, but as his kid sister.
**[09:14] Momo**
Princess...
**[09:17] G**
What are you thinking?
**[09:19] Soyo**
You all should evacuate at once.
**[09:23] Soyo**
I'll take care of this castle myself.
**[09:26] G**
Of all the preposterous ideas!
**[09:27] Soyo**
We cannot leave this castle empty.
**[09:30] Soyo**
When its people are fighting to defend the
country, how can the country abandon them?
**[09:34] G**
But what obligation do you
have to go to such lengths?
**[09:37] G**
This country took your brother's life!
**[09:40] G**
And you are...
**[09:41] Soyo**
Not a princess.
**[09:43] Soyo**
I am Tokugawa Shigeshige's sister.
**[09:46] Soyo**
And I will remain that forever.
**[09:53] Shin**
Then Utsuro is...
**[09:54] Gin**
Sorry. I let him get away.
**[09:56] Gin**
Or maybe he was the one who let me get away.
**[09:59] Shin**
But he must have been
caught in that explosion.
**[10:02] Gin**
If he was the type to die from that,
we wouldn't be having such a hard time.
**[10:05] Kag**
So in the end, we couldn't do anything?
**[10:08] Kag**
We couldn't protect anything?
**[10:11] Kag**
Is everything going just as Utsuro wants?
**[10:13] Kag**
Can the war no longer be stopped?
**[10:15] Gin**
Don't give up!
**[10:17] Gin**
It's not too late! We can still stop it!
**[10:43] En**
*Fire.*
**[11:20] G**
I told you so.
**[11:22] G**
If they go crazy up in the skies, we ground
troops won't get any shots at glory.
**[11:27] G**
We're fighting over four dirty apes?
**[11:30] G**
What matters in a hunt isn't the game,
but the hunters you're up against.
**[11:36] Gin**
Run for it!
**[12:05] Gin**
* I run and run, but I don't feel*
* like I'm getting anywhere.*
**[12:12] (Flashback) Uts**
Your sword...
**[12:16] (Flashback) Sho**
...can't reach me.
**[12:18] Gin**
* Have I not taken a single*
* step forward since then?*
**[12:38] Gin**
*I don't think I'll ever reach him.*
**[12:42] Kon**
It's not over yet!
**[12:50] Kon**
Don't go ending things for yourselves.
**[12:55] Kon**
Keep your eyes forward and
your hands on your sword.
**[13:01] Kon**
Fight, Odd Jobs.
**[13:09] Kon**
Together with us Shinsengumi!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** The Line Between Tenacious and Annoying Is Paper-Thin
**[14:51] G**
Wh-What's going on?
**[14:53] G**
O-Our own tanks suddenly fired at us!
**[14:56] Kon**
Your friends are all gone.
**[15:01] Hij**
They'd parked their vehicles in a
weird spot and were blocking traffic.
**[15:06] Oki**
So we gave them tickets and
impounded their vehicles.
**[15:09] Oki**
We're currently investigating the case.
**[15:11] Kon**
But you guys won't get off that lightly.
**[15:14] Kon**
For traffic violations, destruction
of property, et cetera,
***SIGN*** Special Bakufu Military Police Force
Shinsengumi
**[15:20] Kon**
you are under arrest!
**[15:22] G**
Y-You guys are...
**[15:25] All**
The police.
**[15:34] Nob**
They're back?
**[15:36] Nob**
Edo's hooligan cops are back in town?
**[15:44] Kon**
Charge!
**[15:54] Oki**
What're you standing around for?
**[15:56] Kon**
You'll get left behind.
**[15:58] Hij**
The battle's just getting started.
**[16:01] Hij**
This country...
**[16:06] Hij**
isn't finished just yet.
**[16:10] G**
Fire!
**[16:15] G**
What?
**[16:21] Mat**
Good grief.
**[16:23] Mat**
I gathered troops to fell Nobunobu's country,
**[16:28] Mat**
but look what I'm doing now.
**[16:29] Mat**
Get lost, rubberneckers.
**[16:32] Mat**
You guys were fighting an empty country,
**[16:36] Mat**
but its owners are back now.
**[16:39] Mat**
Whether we defend this country or destroy it,
**[16:43] Kon**
the decision is for us, its citizens, to make!
**[16:47] Kon**
You have no horse in this race.
**[16:49] Kon**
Men, show them how strong
this country really is!
**[17:09] Hij**
I thought you'd lost your
will to fight out of fear,
**[17:12] Hij**
but I'm glad to see you're still
that same old unpredictable moron.
**[17:15] Gin**
Look who's talking.
**[17:16] Gin**
You took awfully long to drag out your
grapefruits after they'd shrunk back inside.
**[17:21] Kon**
When your enemy goes from one
country to the entire universe,
**[17:24] Kon**
no grapefruits are big enough.
**[17:28] Shin**
Sorry! We tried to prevent this, but failed!
**[17:31] Oki**
Jeez. Who was it that cockily
said to leave Edo in her hands?
**[17:37] Kag**
And whose stinking mouth was it that said
he'd come back stronger than anyone?
**[17:43] Oki**
If nothing else, I have grown
strong enough to one-shot you.
**[17:47] Hij**
We gathered up rebels
from across the country,
**[17:50] Hij**
used the old bakufu's connections,
and gained support from other countries.
**[17:53] Kon**
We have more political power than
we could even imagine before.
**[17:56] Kon**
We even bought cutting-edge
weaponry and battleships.
**[17:59] Gin**
That so?
**[18:03] Gin**
And how long will all of that
last against the entire universe?
**[18:17] Kon**
Even if we can't win the war,
**[18:19] Kon**
we might be able to create an
opening with which to stop it.
**[18:24] Kon**
Besides, it wasn't just our political
power or weapons that grew stronger.
**[18:27] Shin**
Kondo-san!
**[18:29] Kon**
Do you really think we were twiddling
our thumbs while we were away from Edo?
**[18:35] Kon**
We swore to protect Edo for sure this time,
and that we'd grow stronger to do it.
**[18:42] Kon**
Sit back and watch the
reborn Shinsengumi's strength.
**[18:48] Shin**
No way, was that...
**[18:49] Kon**
A restraint to keep my
excessive strength in check,
**[18:52] Kon**
and a special-alloy headband that constantly
put strain on me to make me stronger.
**[18:58] Kon**
Did you really think I'd change
my costume for no reason?
**[19:03] Kon**
The time has finally come
to release this power.
**[19:07] Kon**
Gori...
**[19:09] Kon**
Ah, my head hasn't felt
this light in a long time.
**[19:12] Shin**
Of course it does! There's nothing in there!
**[19:14] Shin**
You're taking the "release" thing too far!
**[19:15] Shin**
Who the hell coordinates their
entire getup with weights?!
**[19:18] Kon**
Oops, nearly forgot to take this off, too.
**[19:22] Shin**
Don't take off the mosaic!
**[19:24] Kon**
What's this? I can't even feel my own weight.
**[19:27] Kon**
It's like I've become one with the universe.
**[19:31] Shin**
Kondo-san!
**[19:33] Kon**
Hey. What are you looking at, tree trunk?
**[19:37] Shin**
What are *you* showing off, your junk?!
**[19:44] Kon**
I see it.
**[19:46] Kon**
I see it.
**[19:47] Kon**
I see it all!
**[19:48] Kon**
The rounds are clearly visible,
like they're a slow-ass turtle.
**[19:51] Shin**
Uh, your turtle, rounds, and
ass are clearly visible, too!
**[19:55] Shin**
But wow. He's so fast.
**[19:59] Shin**
Oh, the mosaic.
**[20:05] Shin**
Why?!
**[20:06] Shin**
What happened, Kondo-san?!
**[20:08] Shin**
Don't tell me the real thing
was behind that mosaic!
**[20:10] Shin**
Did you step on your own dick?!
**[20:16] Oki**
Oh, well.
**[20:18] Hij**
Hey, take care of Kondo-san.
**[20:22] Shin**
Hijikata-san! Okita-san!
**[20:24] Hij**
We wanted to save this for a turning point...
**[20:27] Oki**
But now, we have no choice but
to release our powers as well.
**[20:32] Shin**
Wait, are you two...
**[20:35] Oki**
We attained this to protect Edo once again.
**[20:39] Hij**
Behold our new powers!
**[20:44] Shin**
Th-That's...
**[20:48] Hij**
Nicotine Dispel!
**[20:50] Hij**
*Allow me to explain.*
**[20:52] Hij**
* Nicotine Dispel, which involves quitting*
* smoking to increase lung capacity*
**[20:55] Hij**
* and make food taste better,*
* is Hijikata's new power.*
**[20:58] Shin**
All you did was start
taking care of yourself!
**[21:02] Oki**
Mayonnaise Burst!
**[21:06] Oki**
*Allow me to explain.*
**[21:07] Oki**
* Mayonnaise Burst, which involves wasting*
* mayonnaise in front of Hijikata,*
**[21:11] Oki**
* who lives only for mayonnaise,*
* is Okita's new power.*
**[21:14] Shin**
That's nothing new!
**[21:15] Shin**
In the past and now, all you've
ever done is harass the guy!
**[21:20] Hij**
This is the new Shinsengumi's strength!
**[21:22] Oki**
Watch and be amazed!
**[21:25] Shin**
Hey! They haven't changed one bit!
**[21:30] Gin**
They've gotten worse, if anything.
**[21:32] Ymz**
Well, duh, boss.
**[21:35] Ymz**
People can't change that easily.
**[21:38] Ymz**
In other words...
**[21:46] Ymz**
Our desire to protect Edo hasn't
changed one bit, either.
**[21:51] Gin**
Uh, who are you? A new character?
**[21:55] Ymz**
What're you talking about?
**[21:57] Ymz**
It's me, Zakiyama.
**[21:59] Gin**
You're a totally different person now!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:34] Ymz**
We came back with our desire and
ambition to protect Edo still intact.
**[23:40] Ymz**
We're the same old Shinsengumi.
**[23:42] Gin**
Why'd he alone grow far
beyond his potential?!
**[23:45] Gen**
Let's show them what Earth
is truly capable of.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Geezers Carve the Things They
Shouldn't Forget into Their Wrinkles
***SIGN*** The hooligan cops are back,
***SIGN*** but who knows if they've grown or regressed?
***SIGN*** With even more dangers looming large on the horizon,
***SIGN*** the golden man makes his move!
# 346 - Geezers Carve the Things They Shouldn't Forget into Their Wrinkles
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Geezers Carve the Things
They Shouldn't Forget into Their Wrinkles
**[01:44] Ymz**
As you can see, Boss,
**[01:48] Ymz**
we haven't changed one bit.
**[01:51] Ymz**
We came back with our desire and
ambition to protect Edo still intact.
**[01:57] Ymz**
We're the same old Shinsengumi.
**[01:59] Gin**
But you alone are a completely
different person now!
**[02:01] Shin**
Yamazaki-san! What happened to you?
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[02:04] Shin**
Why do you look like you just
got back from the Vietnam War?!
**[02:07] Ymz**
Huh? Do I look that different?
**[02:10] Shin**
"Look"? You *are* different!
**[02:11] G**
Way to go, Zakiyama-san!
**[02:14] G**
The vice chief and Okita-san couldn't
handle it, but you took it out in one shot!
**[02:17] G**
As long as we have you, the
Liberation Army is no match for us!
**[02:20] G**
Zakiyama! Zakiyama!
**[02:24] Gin**
Hey, even their power structure
has changed a little!
**[02:27] Gin**
That plain guy's become
the nucleus of the squad!
**[02:30] Kon**
I quit mosaics.
**[02:32] Hij**
I quit smoking.
**[02:34] Oki**
I quit quitting messing with Hijikata.
**[02:38] Ymz**
I quit Yamazaki.
**[02:40] Gin**
Why'd he alone grow far
beyond his potential?!
**[02:43] G**
Zakiyama! Zakiyama!
**[02:43] Ymz**
I don't really get it myself,
**[02:45] Ymz**
but if I had to say, I guess
I liberated myself, too.
**[02:50] Ymz**
I tried to be like the chief, who realized
his weakness and trained with restraints.
**[02:56] Ymz**
But I was even weaker, so I
couldn't handle the weight.
**[03:00] Ymz**
One day, I noticed that my body felt heavy,
even though I wasn't carrying anything.
**[03:08] Ymz**
And that I may have been shackled
by restraints all along.
**[03:14] Ymz**
So...
**[03:15] Ymz**
I threw off the restraints,
and this is the result.
**[03:17] Gin**
Restraints? That's your body!
**[03:20] Gin**
What's going on here?
**[03:21] Gin**
Zakiyama came out of Yamazaki's ass?
No, Yamazaki came out of Zakiyama's ass?
**[03:24] Gin**
What the hell are you? What the hell is he?!
**[03:27] Ymz**
That's something like the
heavy T-shirt Goku took off.
**[03:31] Ymz**
It seems I was born wearing a heavy
T-shirt called Yamazaki Sagaru.
**[03:35] Gin**
Did you really just compare
him to an object?!
**[03:38] Ymz**
Once I threw it off, my body
felt lighter than ever before.
**[03:42] Ymz**
Sometimes, it's so light, I feel like I
might drift all the way to the heavens.
**[03:45] Gin**
You shouldn't throw it away!
It's probably your soul or something!
**[03:48] Kon**
How impressive.
**[03:50] Kon**
Even you reached the blank state of
mind where you cast even yourself away?
**[03:55] Ymz**
Chief, don't tell me... You too?
**[03:58] Kon**
Hey, who are you talking to?
**[04:02] Kon**
The chief is over here.
**[04:03] Shin**
Forget blank state of mind!
There's no sign of the chief anymore!
**[04:07] Shin**
Why'd he turn into a gorilla
just by taking off a T-shirt?
**[04:09] Shin**
He looks like gorilla dung now!
**[04:11] Kon**
It seems I was a gorilla born
wearing a heavy gorilla T-shirt.
**[04:16] Kon**
Now I've finally been freed from the gorilla.
**[04:19] Shin**
No, you haven't! You've become a
more concentrated version of gorilla!
**[04:23] Kon**
New enemies?
**[04:24] Kon**
Let's go, Yamazaki! Let's show them
what we can do without T-shirts!
**[04:28] Ymz**
Yeah!
**[04:29] Shin**
Hey, hey, hey!
**[04:30] Shin**
The T-shirts got tangled up!
**[04:32] Shin**
The T-shirts got caught!
**[04:35] Shin**
The T-shirt's crying!
**[04:37] Shin**
Hey, timeout! If you're gonna take
them off, take them off right!
**[04:40] Shin**
You're gonna rip the T-shirts!
**[04:42] Bo**
Untangle it, please!
**[04:44] Oki**
Like this?
**[04:45] Shin**
Not that way!
**[04:46] Hij**
Like this.
**[04:48] Shin**
You're not even trying!
**[04:49] Shin**
Are you pissed off at them?
Are you pissed at them after all?
**[04:52] Shin**
Hey! Both the gorilla and Rambo collapsed!
**[04:55] Gin**
I knew it! Those T-shirts weren't
supposed to be cast off!
**[04:57] Gin**
Hurry up and put them back on!
**[05:01] Shin**
The explosion blew the gorilla T-shirt away!
**[05:03] Gin**
If we lose it, the gorilla's
going straight to heaven!
**[05:06] Oki**
Don't worry. For now,
I dressed the gorilla again...
**[05:10] Oki**
in an Ahodas T-shirt.
**[05:13] Kon**
Let's go! The match isn't over yet!
**[05:15] Kon**
Shoot for tomorrow!
**[05:17] Gin**
Hey! Ahodas took over his body!
**[05:20] Shin**
Why is a T-shirt that calls him
an idiot dictating his personality?
**[05:22] G**
Well, this is better than before! Follow him!
**[05:24] G**
Aim for the goal!
**[05:25] Shin**
Goal? Where is that?!
**[05:26] Gin**
What the hell did you tax
thieves come back for?
**[05:29] Hij**
Shut it! We haven't gotten any pay in ages!
**[05:32] Hij**
We're trying to save the world
for free! Cut us some slack here!
**[05:36] Gin**
If this is all you've got,
the world is doomed for sure!
**[05:38] Oki**
There, there. Relax a bit, Hijikata-san.
**[05:41] Oki**
Here you go.
**[05:42] Hij**
Cheers.
**[05:44] Hij**
Wait, why're you ruining my attempt to quit?!
**[05:46] Kag**
You don't get to live longer when
Earth's heading for destruction!
**[05:50] Oki**
She's right.
**[05:51] Oki**
If we're all bound for destruction,
your lungs should be the first to go.
**[05:55] Hij**
Why does all responsibility
rest on my lungs?!
**[05:57] Shin**
Hey! Yamazaki-san's speeding ahead
toward destruction by himself!
**[06:01] Gin**
Y'know, if you hadn't left Edo wide open,
this would never have happened!
**[06:04] Hij**
You guys were the ones who neglected
it! You got the world destroyed!
**[06:08] Gin**
Screw you! Half the blame lies with you guys!
**[06:10] Gin**
The other half lies with your lungs!
**[06:11] Hij**
In the end, it's all my fault?!
**[06:15] Hij**
Hey, what's so funny?
**[06:17] Hij**
Do you realize the situation we're in?
**[06:19] Ttsnsk**
I do, Vice Chief!
**[06:22] Ttsnsk**
The terminal was broken
and the town destroyed,
**[06:25] Ttsnsk**
but this town came out
of it without a scratch!
**[06:29] Ttsnsk**
The Edo we fell in love with is right here!
**[06:36] Capt**
The old bakufu army?
**[06:38] Capt**
After all that's happened, they still
want to die with their country?
**[06:42] Capt**
All ships, lock and load!
**[06:48] Capt**
Fire!
**[06:56] Capt**
Wh-What's going on?
**[06:57] G**
The muzzles exploded as soon as we fired!
**[07:00] Capt**
What's this black haze?
**[07:03] Mats**
Flame Haze.
**[07:05] Mats**
A smokescreen that reacts to high
temperatures and prevents use of all firearms.
**[07:10] Mats**
I see.
**[07:12] Mats**
This isn't only the land of the samurai.
**[07:15] Mats**
It also belongs to you guys, huh?
**[07:20] Sac**
The civilians have been evacuated.
**[07:23] Sac**
The town's completely empty now.
**[07:26] Sac**
Everything's ready,
**[07:28] Sac**
Leader.
**[07:31] Zen**
Now we're free to go wild.
**[07:34] Zen**
As ninja, our duty is to live in the shadows.
**[07:37] Zen**
But we don't need to anymore,
now that we've lost our lord, the light.
**[07:43] Zen**
Show off the skills you've honed
all you want in broad daylight.
**[07:48] Zen**
Etch into their memories the fact that
this country is also home to ninja.
**[07:53] Zen**
Not in the shadows, but under
the light that shines upon you.
**[07:58] Zen**
Live and die to the fullest.
**[08:03] Sac**
Is that the answer you've found?
**[08:07] Zen**
There's no right answer.
**[08:10] Zen**
But if, just as I tried to protect
the princess as Shigeshige's buddy,
**[08:14] Zen**
she's trying to fight as Shigeshige's sister,
**[08:18] Zen**
then I have no right to stop her.
**[08:22] Zen**
In that case,
**[08:25] Zen**
all I can do is protect everything.
**[08:30] Zen**
That's the light that
shines upon me right now.
**[08:39] Zen**
The Oniwaban are joining the fray!
**[08:44] En**
Give me a status report.
**[08:46] G**
* The old bakufu army suddenly*
* showed up at Edo Castle*
**[08:50] G**
*and dealt a critical blow to our first wave.*
**[08:58] Kon**
Charge!
**[09:11] Hij**
The Oniwaban?
**[09:13] Kag**
Sacchan!
**[09:15] Gin**
Looks like they've finally
stepped out of the shadows.
**[09:18] Sac**
Playtime's over!
**[09:19] Sac**
I'll show you what a ninja can do!
**[09:22] Sac**
Here I come...
**[09:24] Sac**
Gin-san!
**[09:24] Gin**
Why Gin-san?!
**[09:26] Gin**
Why are you jumping at me with that face?
**[09:29] Gin**
You looked more like an
enemy than the enemy does!
**[09:31] Sac**
How cruel.
**[09:32] Sac**
We haven't met in so long,
and you shame me like this?
**[09:35] Sac**
Your abuse really is a cut above.
**[09:38] Sac**
I'm your sow for life, Master!
**[09:41] Gin**
This deviant is too much
to deal with after so long.
**[09:43] Gin**
I forgot how to defend against this,
so it's landing body blows. I'm gonna puke!
**[09:47] Sac**
But I believed in you.
**[09:49] Sac**
I knew you'd come back.
**[09:51] Sac**
I did my best, you know?
**[09:53] Sac**
I was sure things would work out
if we held on until you returned.
**[09:58] Gin**
Sorry I kept you waiting.
**[09:59] Sac**
You don't have to apologize.
**[10:01] Sac**
You've come back so big and sturdy.
**[10:04] Sac**
But I don't know about this size.
I might not be able to handle it.
**[10:08] Gin**
That ain't Gin-san.
**[10:10] Gin**
Gin-san ain't that much of a showoff.
**[10:16] Zen**
I didn't think I'd see that stupid shtick
again before the world was destroyed.
**[10:22] Gin**
I didn't think your asshole would be
destroyed before the world, either.
**[10:27] Sac**
No! Gin-san's chastity!
**[10:30] Gin**
That's Zen-san's chastity, not Gin-san's.
**[10:34] Zen**
I'm not so optimistic as to have thought
things would change once you returned.
**[10:40] Zen**
But looking at your stupid face
**[10:44] Zen**
certainly did help me relax a little.
**[10:47] Gin**
That's what I'd like to say.
**[10:50] Gin**
Seeing you guys reminded me...
**[10:54] Gin**
That even if the world
were ending the next day,
**[10:57] Gin**
we're the kind of morons who'd
rush to buy Jump like usual.
**[11:01] Gin**
That it doesn't matter if the world ends
or not, or whether I reach him or not.
**[11:06] Gin**
That I was the kind of person
who'd run at full speed anyway.
**[11:10] Gin**
For a moment there, I was ready
to end things for myself.
**[11:14] Gin**
But you guys showed me
the way back here again.
**[11:19] Gin**
Thank you for waiting for me
as the same old morons.
**[11:26] Oki**
How rude.
**[11:27] Oki**
Hijikata-san sucked his abstinence pipe
until he could suck on it like a pacifier,
**[11:31] Oki**
and you call him the same old moron?
**[11:33] Hij**
Shut up.
**[11:33] Hij**
That's not me. I prefer Magazine.
**[11:37] Zen**
If this keeps up, we won't be
able to buy Jump or Magazine.
**[11:40] Gin**
In that case...
**[11:43] Gin**
We just need to save the world by Monday!
**[11:48] Kon**
That's some big talk.
**[11:50] Kon**
You wanna stop the world's end
over the weekend?
**[11:54] Kon**
Let's do it, then.
**[11:56] Kon**
We'll turn that lame joke
into reality by our hands
**[11:59] Kon**
and laugh until our sides hurt!
**[12:03] Kon**
What say you,
**[12:05] Kon**
Mimawarigumi Vice Chief?
**[12:08] Kon**
I can't wait to see how your grumpy
face looks when the time comes.
**[12:13] Nob**
I'll laugh all you want.
**[12:17] Nob**
But it looks like those
laughs won't come cheap.
**[12:26] En**
A black haze? That won't be
enough to erase our fire.
**[12:32] En**
The more you struggle, the more
sorrow and wrath it causes,
**[12:37] En**
and the more it stokes our flame of revenge.
**[12:41] En**
Mobile Weapon
**[12:44] En**
Takemikazuchi...
**[12:48] En**
Launch.
**[12:55] En**
Launch.
**[13:06] Zen**
Yikes.
**[13:08] Zen**
This is bad.
**[13:10] Zen**
They're trying to burn away
the flame haze from above.
**[13:15] G**
Chief!
**[13:16] G**
It's not just from the air.
**[13:18] G**
Reinforcements are streaming
in on the surface, too.
**[13:24] G**
No, that's not all!
**[13:27] G**
Could they be...
**[13:29] G**
The Dakini!
**[13:32] G**
The Shinra!
**[13:34] G**
The Yato!
**[13:36] Kon**
The three great warrior races are here?
**[13:38] Kon**
They've even got them on their side?
**[13:41] Hij**
We've only been fighting
the opening act so far?
**[13:45] Oki**
Sheesh. Forget the weekend,
we might not even last the day.
**[13:50] Gen**
*At last, huh?*
**[13:54] Shin**
Gengai-san!
**[13:56] Gen**
*Looks like it's our time to shine.*
**[13:58] Gen**
* If that's the enemy's game, we'll just*
* have to go all-out ourselves, too.*
**[14:04] Gen**
Let's show them what Earth
is truly capable of.
**[14:08] Gin**
Gramps...
**[14:11] Kin**
We're first up, huh?
**[14:14] Kin**
Oh, well.
**[14:16] Kin**
If silver's not up to the task,
**[14:19] Kin**
gold will have to pick up the slack.
**[14:23] Kin**
From cleaning up after a
moron to saving the world,
**[14:25] Kin**
Odd Jobs Kin-chan will do anything.
**[14:28] Shin**
Kin-san!
**[14:30] Gin**
You!
**[14:31] Kin**
Hey, defective protag.
**[14:35] Kin**
The man I was modeled after is
having trouble saving the world?
**[14:40] Kin**
I'll take care of half the world.
**[14:44] Kin**
* Even a defective piece like you can*
* handle the other half, I'm sure.*
**[14:50] Tama**
He never learns, does he?
**[14:53] Tama**
Silver or gold, each of us is but a cog.
**[14:59] Tama**
But if all of us cogs come together,
we could turn the machine of the world.
**[15:05] Gen**
As of now, Kabuki District is the
cornerstone of humanity's defense.
**[15:12] Gen**
The rest...
**[15:13] Oto**
Yeah, you can leave it in our hands.
**[15:15] Gin**
*Gramps! Tama!*
**[15:17] Gin**
*What are you thinking?!*
**[15:20] Gin**
*Gramps!*
**[15:25] (Flashback) Sab**
What's the point of making
these killing machines?
**[15:28] (Flashback) Sab**
Didn't you always say you wanted to
make machines that served mankind?
**[15:34] (Flashback) Sab**
I loved watching you as you had fun
tinkering with things while covered in grease.
**[15:43] Gen**
*And so, you joined the war instead of me*
**[15:47] Gen**
*and died, leaving this geezer behind.*
**[15:52] Gen**
*A lot has happened since then.*
**[15:54] Gen**
* I met all kinds of people and*
* had all kinds of thoughts.*
**[15:58] Gen**
*Thoughts like why I survived,*
**[16:01] Gen**
*and why I build machines.*
**[16:05] Gen**
*The answer...*
**[16:12] Gen**
You and the people you brought
into my life showed me.
**[16:17] Gen**
The reason I built machines
was all for this moment.
**[16:23] G**
Wh-What is that massive cannon?!
**[16:28] Gen**
Machines exist to serve and help people.
**[16:34] Gen**
This is my answer...
**[16:37] Gen**
The Neo Armstrong Cyclone
Jet Armstrong Gengai Cannon!
**[16:42] Shin**
It's just a dirty joke!
**[16:44] Shin**
Earth grew a pen*s!
**[16:50] Gen**
It's too late.
**[16:53] Gen**
Right from the time we lost to you in
the Joi War, all the way up to now,
**[16:59] Gen**
I was secretly building
this thing underground.
**[17:04] Gen**
Tama, Kinnoji. Will you do it?
**[17:08] Gen**
I need your help to power that thing up.
**[17:13] Gen**
When gold and robot queen connect to the two
control spheres and become crown je*els,
**[17:19] Gen**
they can launch something
from this pole here.
**[17:21] Shin**
It's just a dirty joke!
**[17:23] Tama**
We've already steeled ourselves, Gengai-sama.
**[17:28] Kin**
Don't waste this golden cog,
**[17:33] Kin**
gramps.
**[17:36] Gen**
Thank you.
**[17:39] Gen**
Back then, we didn't lose to you guys.
**[17:44] Gen**
We lost to your science and
technology—your machines.
**[17:48] Gen**
But we absorbed your technology and evolved.
**[17:54] Gen**
In order to never have the things we
hold dear taken from us again,
**[17:57] Gen**
we kept turning the cogs each and every day.
**[18:00] Gen**
Amanto, I owe you for back then.
**[18:03] Gen**
I'll repay you now.
**[18:08] Gen**
Along with the scrap
metal I fell in love with.
**[18:31] Gen**
Machines all over Edo!
**[18:35] Gen**
Let me borrow your cogs!
**[18:38] Gen**
Show them what you're made of!
**[18:45] Gen**
Go!
**[19:08] G**
Wha...
**[19:09] G**
What's this? Nothing happened...
**[19:24] (Flashback) Tama**
Then,
**[19:26] (Flashback) Tama**
the machine that will put
a stop to the war is...
**[19:29] (Flashback) Gen**
Yeah, it's not that big lug.
**[19:32] (Flashback) Gen**
It's these tiny ones.
**[19:34] (Flashback) Gen**
They're what are called nanomachines.
**[19:38] (Flashback) Gen**
I've named them bees.
**[19:42] (Flashback) Gen**
If launched through this thing,
the bees will stay in the air
**[19:46] (Flashback) Gen**
and infiltrate any machines.
**[19:48] (Flashback) Gen**
And their virus will take
over all the targets' systems
**[19:54] (Flashback) Gen**
and halt their functions.
**[19:58] (Flashback) Gen**
In other words...
**[20:01] (Flashback) Gen**
they're machines that kill machines.
**[20:04] (Flashback) Gen**
But it'd be pointless to stop the
Liberation Army for a moment.
**[20:09] (Flashback) Gen**
If we're using these, it must be to make
a barrier that covers the whole country.
**[20:14] (Flashback) Gen**
Basically, if humanity is to survive,
we must abandon you guys.
**[20:19] (Flashback) Gen**
Besides, the important
thing to remember is...
**[20:22] (Flashback) Kin**
...when the cannon is frozen,
**[20:25] (Flashback) Kin**
you'll need machines to take
over from the system, right?
**[20:31] (Flashback) Kin**
Who else could do that but us?
**[20:34] (Flashback) Gen**
Kinnoji...
**[20:35] (Flashback) Gen**
Do you realize what you're saying?
**[20:37] (Flashback) Gen**
This is an absurd role that
involves killing yourself!
**[20:42] (Flashback) Kin**
But the world will end
unless we do this, right?
**[20:45] (Flashback) Kin**
Besides, I won't be fighting
the Liberation Army.
**[20:52] (Flashback) Kin**
It'll be that man.
**[20:54] (Flashback) Kin**
The time has finally come to
pay him back for back then.
**[20:59] (Flashback) Kin**
If he's trying to save the
world, I'll save it before him.
**[21:04] (Flashback) Kin**
That's Sakata Kintoki's revenge.
**[21:08] (Flashback) Kin**
Isn't that a golden idea, Tama-san?
**[21:11] (Flashback) Tama**
The color gold is somewhat similar
to poopy brown, isn't it?
**[21:14] (Flashback) Kin**
Come on. I see you're as
cold to machines as always.
**[21:18] (Flashback) Tama**
But...
**[21:20] (Flashback) Tama**
Deep down, you're a machine
Gengai-sama made, too.
**[21:25] (Flashback) Tama**
Gengai-sama, there is no need to worry.
**[21:29] (Flashback) Tama**
We know.
**[21:31] (Flashback) Tama**
Every machine that has been
built with love knows.
**[21:37] (Flashback) Tama**
We know what you felt as you
turned the cogs day after day.
**[21:47] (Flashback) Tama**
We know that machines exist to serve people.
**[22:05] Gin**
Gramps!
**[22:07] Gin**
Gramps!
**[22:08] Gin**
Tama!
**[22:11] Gin**
Tama!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Tama**
We will meet again one day, for sure.
***SIGN*** Machines That Pick Up Useless Habits Are Called People
***SIGN*** The machines' resolve,
***SIGN*** and the humans' resolve.
# 347 - Machines That Pick Up Useless Habits Are Called People
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:58] Gen**
*Why are you dying without a word?*
**[02:01] Gen**
* At least cough up a complaint*
* or two before you go.*
**[02:09] Gen**
* You pieces of junk normally*
* never listen to me,*
**[02:13] Gen**
*so why now, of all times,*
**[02:15] Gen**
*do you look like fine machinery*
**[02:19] Gen**
*as you silently break down?*
**[02:24] Gen**
*"Machines exist to serve people"?*
**[02:28] Gen**
*You're certainly right.*
**[02:31] Gen**
*But if you guys didn't want to,*
**[02:35] Gen**
*I wouldn't have minded one bit.*
**[02:42] Gen**
* Even if you didn't serve any purpose,*
* even if you were useless pieces of junk...*
**[02:48] Gen**
*As long you guys, my friends, were beside me,*
**[02:54] Gen**
*I was fully prepared to die with you!*
**[03:01] Gen**
*And yet...*
**[03:04] Gen**
*I'm sorry.*
**[03:09] Gen**
*I'm so sorry.*
**[03:12] Gen**
*I'm so, so sorry!*
**[03:17] Kin**
That man poured his heart and soul,
his whole life, into machines,
**[03:23] Kin**
and now he has to throw them
all away to stop the war?
**[03:26] Kin**
He's been forced to make a choice
far more painful than death.
**[03:31] Kin**
But we still can't turn tail.
**[03:36] Kin**
Because we're machines
built by Hiraga Gengai!
**[03:44] Kin**
Have you said your goodbyes,
**[03:48] Kin**
Tama-san?
**[03:55] Tama**
No. There's no need for that.
**[04:01] Tama**
Whatever may be destroyed or stolen,
**[04:06] Tama**
they will surely take it all back.
**[04:09] Tama**
We will meet again one day, for sure.
**[04:14] Tama**
So I will not say goodbye to anyone.
**[04:22] Kin**
That so?
**[04:25] Kin**
Think it's possible?
**[04:27] Kin**
Can they do it?
**[04:31] Tama**
Of course. I'm sure they can.
**[04:35] Tama**
After all, they're the people who
took the dullest piece of gold
**[04:39] Tama**
and polished it enough for
it to save half the world.
**[04:46] Kin**
They spared my life once, anyway.
**[04:52] Kin**
So I'll leave it in their hands...
**[04:55] Kin**
This life!
**[04:57] Tama**
And the world!
**[04:59] Bo**
Listen up, humanity!
**[05:04] Bo**
We leave the rest to you!
**[05:58] Tama**
*I don't need to say goodbye.*
**[06:02] Tama**
*If there's one thing I can say, it's this:*
**[06:09] Tama**
* Before, I never hesitated to*
* perform my duties as a machine.*
**[06:16] Tama**
*I was just another screw.*
**[06:21] Tama**
* But to those who filled me*
* with so much pointless data,*
**[06:31] Tama**
*to those who*
**[06:34] Tama**
*turned me into this oil-drenched screw...*
**[06:40] Tama**
Thank you for being my friends.
**[06:47] Gin**
Tama!
**[07:00] Shin**
* On that day, the machines chose to*
* quit being functioning machinery*
**[07:07] Shin**
* and became completely*
* useless friends of ours.*
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Machines That Pick Up Useless Habits Are Called People
**[07:20] G**
We've totally lost contact with Earth!
**[07:23] G**
No word on the well-being
of the squads in action!
**[07:24] G**
Even the battleships on standby in
the main formation are being affected!
**[07:31] En**
What is going on?
**[07:34] Sak**
Too bad.
**[07:37] Sak**
They wanted you ta have the best seats
to see the fireworks, Shogun-sama,
**[07:41] Sak**
but it seems they were all wet and soggy.
**[07:44] Sak**
We're tired of standin' around.
**[07:46] Sak**
Could you send us back ta
where our friends are?
**[07:52] En**
Wait.
**[07:53] Nb**
No need. I can tell what happened
without having to see it.
**[07:57] Nb**
I believe I told you
**[08:00] Nb**
that we will not lose!
**[08:05] G**
Whoa. They sank all of the
Liberation Army's battleships!
**[08:11] Tae**
Tama-san...
**[08:13] Cat**
Otose-san, you don't think they...
**[08:19] Oto**
They'll come back, no matter what.
**[08:25] Gen**
You got into a huge fight with
machines from all over the universe.
**[08:30] Gen**
Get a little rest for now.
**[08:34] Gen**
But know that I'll repair you and
work you to the bone again...
**[08:39] Gen**
No matter what.
**[08:43] Gen**
It's a promise.
**[08:45] Gen**
So let us...
**[08:49] Oto**
Let humanity take care of the rest.
**[08:54] Oto**
This place is your home...
**[09:00] Bo**
And we swear to protect it!
**[09:07] Kon**
Even firearms have been neutralized
because of their inner machinery.
**[09:11] Kon**
That old man and his robots did it.
**[09:14] Kon**
They really saved half the world!
**[09:18] Zen**
Man, this sucks.
**[09:20] Zen**
I'd finally prepared myself
for the worst here.
**[09:23] Zen**
Don't be getting my hopes up again.
**[09:26] Zen**
Technology and weapons?
**[09:28] Zen**
Are those the only areas
we were overwhelmed in?
**[09:34] Zen**
Did you forget about numbers?
**[09:39] Dak**
The battle is only getting started.
**[09:41] Dak**
Damn earthlings had a pretty
amusing trick up their sleeve.
**[09:45] Dak**
But we still have weapons right here...
**[09:49] Dak**
We Dakini, feared as tanks of destruction.
**[09:54] G**
Sotatsu-sama...
**[09:56] Sot**
We'll have him carry the load.
**[09:59] Sot**
I have no interest in
revenge, freedom, or glory.
**[10:03] Sot**
But we will take all the spoils.
**[10:07] Kag**
Are those guys going to head
toward the Kabuki District?
**[10:11] Shin**
If such a huge army marches in there...
**[10:14] Gin**
They knew that all along.
**[10:18] Hij**
The geezer and the others used the Kabuki
District as bait knowing this would happen.
**[10:23] Zen**
The most important thing in war
is predicting the enemy's moves.
**[10:28] Kon**
Right now, it's obvious where they
will go and what they're after.
**[10:35] Kon**
Right now, we might be
able to cause a miracle.
**[10:38] Kon**
Edo's biggest hoodlum district
has given Edo one last hope.
**[10:47] Oto**
Close the gates!
***SIGN*** Kabuki District First
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Town
***SIGN*** Kabuki District First
**[11:00] Tae**
All right.
**[11:01] Tae**
This is mankind's final stronghold.
**[11:05] Tae**
Until our friends across Edo come here,
**[11:07] Tae**
we must hold out no matter what.
**[11:13] Cat**
We don't have any means of communication.
**[11:16] Cat**
Will anyone really come for us?
**[11:18] Tae**
They will.
**[11:20] Tae**
We don't need to communicate.
They already know.
**[11:32] Dak**
Charge!
**[11:39] Tae**
They know how much
**[11:42] Tae**
we all love this town.
**[11:57] Dak**
Charge!
**[12:06] Zen**
The enemy's target is the cannon.
**[12:09] Zen**
They think destroying it will fix
**[12:12] Zen**
their broken machines and
reestablish contact with their rear.
**[12:16] Zen**
They have huge numbers,
but that's also their weakness.
**[12:20] Zen**
If we poke at them from multiple
sides and make then panic,
**[12:22] Zen**
they'll soon lose their footing
and go out of control.
**[12:26] Zen**
That said, be careful.
**[12:27] Zen**
Don't go in too deep. Keep your distance.
**[12:31] Sac**
We know.
**[12:32] Sac**
Kabuki District's residents risked
it all to give us this ray of hope.
**[12:36] Sac**
We won't let it be in vain!
**[12:40] G**
Vice Chief!
**[12:40] G**
We're ready!
**[12:43] Hij**
Think we can do this?
**[12:44] G**
If we set up that many, it should work.
**[12:47] Hij**
Listen up.
**[12:48] Hij**
Consider this battle lost if
they reach the Kabuki District.
**[12:52] Hij**
We'll strike at the center of their
long formation and split them up.
**[12:55] Kon**
After that, how many do
we each have to cut down?
**[12:59] Hij**
Let's see...
**[13:01] Hij**
If you cut down two hundred
each, I'll give you a bonus.
**[13:04] G**
Two hundred?
**[13:05] Oki**
Then if I cut down a thousand,
the position of vice chief is mine?
**[13:12] Hij**
I'll consider it.
**[13:13] G**
Wow, the vice chief finally
gave his blessing!
**[13:15] G**
If Captain Okita becomes vice chief,
the world will end anyway.
**[13:20] Ymz**
You can say that again.
**[13:22] Ymz**
But if it's going to end either way,
that way sounds like it'd be more fun.
**[13:26] Kon**
Yeah, I feel the same way.
**[13:30] Kon**
At this point, whether the world ends or not,
**[13:33] Kon**
it's not the Shinsengumi if
we're not protecting Edo.
**[13:36] Kon**
And whether the world ends or not,
**[13:38] Kon**
it's not Odd Jobs if they're not
raising hell in the Kabuki District.
**[13:42] Kon**
Your resting place will find its own
way to you at the end of your life.
**[13:48] Kon**
Go live your life,
**[13:51] Kon**
Odd Jobs.
**[14:06] Kon**
Let's go!
**[14:22] Mut**
How'd Earth look?
**[14:24] Sak**
They're doin' well ta hold out.
You could call it a miracle.
**[14:29] Sak**
But given the difference in
numbers, that won't last long.
**[14:32] Sak**
Unless we stop this war while
they're still hangin' in there,
**[14:37] Sak**
there won't be any more miracles.
**[14:40] Shi**
Do you have any ideas?
**[14:43] Shi**
Actually, even if you did, it's too late now.
**[14:48] Shi**
I've done a horrible thing to you earthlings.
**[14:51] Shi**
Even though I agreed to
a ceasefire with you,
**[14:54] Shi**
I couldn't stop that man.
**[14:59] Nb**
Admiral Shijaku? You're imprisoned, too?
**[15:03] Shi**
The Liberation Army's flame of revenge
has grown too large to stamp out.
**[15:08] Shi**
It won't stop until it burns
everything in its path.
**[15:10] Sak**
If we can't stamp it out,
we just gotta direct it elsewhere.
**[15:14] Sak**
There's someone else we both must fight.
**[15:19] Shi**
If you mean the Tendoshu, they're already...
**[15:21] Sak**
Nah, there's still one.
**[15:23] Sak**
And if we keep fightin' like this,
not only will you not get your revenge,
**[15:28] Sak**
you'll be helpin' him reach
his goal of destroyin' Earth.
**[15:32] Shi**
What do you people know?
**[15:36] Sak**
Let's see...
**[15:38] Sak**
We know that you're the only trustworthy
man in the Liberation Army, at least.
**[15:45] Sak**
Shijaku, if you truly care
about the Liberation Army,
**[15:49] Sak**
if you truly wish to give the
universe its freedom back,
**[15:52] Sak**
then help us.
**[15:54] Sak**
It's not too late.
**[15:58] Shi**
That's not the kind of
line you say in a prison.
**[16:01] Shi**
You people are now completely isolated
from the rest of the universe—
**[16:06] Sak**
You realized, huh?
**[16:08] Sak**
We were prepared for everythin'
once we were summoned here.
**[16:13] Sak**
And we've already laid the groundwork.
**[16:19] Shi**
Another squad?
**[16:21] Shi**
You predicted that things could go south
and split your squad into two beforehand?
**[16:25] Sak**
A stealth ship, our Kaientai's pride and joy!
**[16:29] Sak**
It must be approachin' this HQ by now.
**[16:32] Sak**
Once I give the word,
they'll come chargin' aboard.
**[16:35] Sak**
It's time ta make our comeback, Zura.
**[16:37] Kat**
I'm not Zura. I'm Inmate Number 3692.
**[16:41] Sak**
*Oh, sorry. Wrong number.*
**[16:44] Mut**
What happened?
**[16:45] Sak**
Radioed the wrong person.
**[16:47] Sak**
That wasn't Zura. It was 3692.
**[16:50] Kat**
*I'm not 3692. I'm Katsura.*
**[16:54] Sak**
Wait, you're imprisoned, too?
**[16:56] Sak**
Wait a second! Where the hell are you?
**[17:00] Sak**
Didn't I tell you to take care of
things if anything happened ta us?
**[17:03] Kat**
Relax. We're another squad.
**[17:05] Kat**
We were caught for a reason
totally unrelated to yours.
**[17:08] Sak**
*That's how you differentiate yourselves?*
**[17:09] Kat**
The thing is, after we split up from you,
**[17:11] Kat**
something unexpected happened
while we were standing by.
**[17:14] (Flashback) Kat**
Men, prepare to charge in at any time.
**[17:18] (Flashback) G**
Whoa!
**[17:19] (Flashback) G**
What's the matter?
**[17:20] (Flashback) G**
Well, an enemy ship just
passed right in front of us.
**[17:24] (Flashback) Kat**
Fret not. They cannot see us.
**[17:28] (Flashback) Kat**
This is a stealth ship, after all.
**[17:29] (Flashback) G**
A-Are you sure they can't see us?
**[17:32] (Flashback) G**
I feel like they've been
circling us for a while.
**[17:34] (Flashback) Kat**
You're overthinking it.
**[17:36] (Flashback) G**
But Katsura-san, have you ever actually
seen a stealth ship's exterior?
**[17:40] (Flashback) G**
What do we look like from the outside?
**[17:43] (Flashback) G**
And what is "stealth," anyway?
**[17:45] (Flashback) Kat**
Stealth, well...
**[17:49] (Flashback) Kat**
It must be see-through, or something.
**[17:52] (Flashback) Kat**
Wait!
**[17:53] (Flashback) Kat**
Even if the ship is see-through, we aren't!
**[17:56] (Flashback) Kat**
Which means...
**[17:59] (Flashback) Kat**
We're totally visible!
***SIGN*** You're wrong, Katsura-san. This ship and all of us on it can't be seen from the outside.
**[18:04] (Flashback) Kat**
O-Oh, okay. So everything is
see-through, including us?
**[18:08] (Flashback) Kat**
Wait!
**[18:09] (Flashback) Kat**
Even if we are see-through,
what we take in from the outside
**[18:12] (Flashback) Kat**
and all of its residue...
**[18:16] (Flashback) Kat**
It's totally visible!
***SIGN*** You're wrong, Katsura-san. Stealth here refers to technology that conceals an object using camouflage which adapts to the surrounding scenery.
**[18:22] (Flashback) Kat**
Oh, is that how it is? I see.
**[18:24] (Flashback) Kat**
So even if our insides are visible,
**[18:27] (Flashback) Kat**
this technology will make the ship
adapt to that and hide us all.
**[18:30] (Flashback) Kat**
It's totally visible after all!
**[18:34] (Flashback) Kat**
Damn you, Sakamoto!
**[18:35] (Flashback) Kat**
How dare you make us ride
this piece of junk?!
***SIGN*** Forget it.
**[18:38] (Flashback) Kat**
Men, hurry up and camouflage yourselves!
**[18:41] (Flashback) Kat**
Turn off the lights!
**[18:42] (Flashback) Kat**
Hide your presence!
**[18:43] (Flashback) Kat**
Become one with space!
**[18:45] (Flashback) Kat**
You are nothing! Blend in with
the space all around you!
**[18:48] (Flashback) Kat**
You are a part of space, and space itself!
**[18:54] (Flashback) G**
Uh, Katsura-san?
**[18:56] (Flashback) G**
We can't see anything.
**[19:02] Kat**
* So yeah, we rammed into some ship*
* thanks to your piece of junk.*
**[19:07] Sak**
You mean thanks to the junk you call a brain!
**[19:09] Kat**
Before we knew it, we'd been surrounded
and captured by some strange group.
**[19:14] Sak**
*Not the Liberation Army?*
**[19:16] Kat**
Yeah, not them.
**[19:17] Kat**
They're a weird bunch with something
indecent-looking growing from their foreheads.
**[19:22] Kat**
You know what they said to us?
**[19:24] Kat**
"We didn't capture you.
We took you into our care."
**[19:30] Kat**
This ship exists to safeguard the
species of Earth from its demise...
**[19:34] Hata**
Noah's Ark.
**[19:36] Jii**
Truly.
**[19:37] Hata**
Good job gathering all of these, Gramps.
**[19:40] Jii**
Thank you.
**[19:41] Jii**
We took advantage of the chaos of war and
went around cattle mutilating everything.
**[19:45] Jii**
That planet is doomed to destruction.
Anyone who would complain is going to die, too.
**[19:50] Hata**
Yes. If anything, they should be thanking me.
**[19:53] Hata**
I'm saving these animals from extinction
and even making them my pets.
***SIGN*** Mongrel
**[19:58] Hata**
But couldn't you take a more uniform
sample? This is really lopsided.
***SIGN*** Matsudaira Dog
***SIGN*** Watanabe Dog
**[20:02] Jii**
Dogs are a truly diverse species.
***SIGN*** Shimura Dog
**[20:06] Hata**
Oh, really?
**[20:09] Hata**
And this one's dead!
***SIGN*** Underdog
**[20:12] Jii**
That's a loser underdog.
**[20:15] Jii**
Believe it or not, it's actually alive.
**[20:18] Hata**
Is that true?!
**[20:19] Jii**
It can't protect its loved
ones or die with them.
**[20:23] Jii**
It's a creature that goes through
life simply withering away.
**[20:26] Hata**
I see. Such a pitiful creature.
**[20:30] Hata**
But don't worry. I won't let you die.
**[20:33] Hata**
Even if you suffer so much you want to die,
**[20:36] Hata**
I won't let you die.
**[20:37] Hata**
You're my dear pet.
**[20:39] Hata**
Anyway, I heard you captured a new species?
**[20:43] Jii**
Oh, it's over there.
***SIGN*** Joi Rebill
**[20:45] Jii**
It seems our men picked them up
after our ship ran them over.
**[20:50] Hata**
Joi Rebill?
**[20:52] Hata**
Like a type of billed duck?
**[20:54] Hata**
Hey, are you cleaning the cage?
**[20:57] Hata**
All I can see is dung!
The thing's nowhere to be found!
**[20:59] Jii**
Ah, the old zoo cliché.
**[21:01] Jii**
A cage where you can't see
the animal, wait as you may,
**[21:03] Jii**
and can only see its poop all over.
**[21:05] Hata**
Look, forget about the cliché.
Where's the Joi Rebill?
**[21:08] Jii**
That's a zoo cliché, too.
**[21:09] Jii**
You think it's poop, but it was
actually a coiled-up Joi Rebill.
**[21:12] Hata**
That's a Joi Rebill? Joi Rebills coil up?!
**[21:19] Jii**
P-Prince!
**[21:21] Kat**
You'd best be careful.
**[21:22] Kat**
Joi Rebills adapt to their surroundings
and hide their presence.
**[21:27] Kat**
Do you know what that's called?
**[21:31] Kat**
Stealth.
**[21:32] G**
Unhand the prince!
**[21:34] Kat**
An ark to safeguard the species?
**[21:37] Kat**
Don't be such cheapskates.
**[21:41] Kat**
Why not build an ark big enough
to save the entire planet?
**[21:49] Hata**
No, wait... Don't...
**[21:53] ---**
I'm... I'm gonna... I'm gonna... I'm gonna...
**[22:04] Hata**
I puked...
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] King**
I don't have long left.
**[23:41] King**
So I must resolve this problem before I go.
**[23:46] G**
That's what you call a king.
**[23:49] E**
My name is Dragonia.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Men Must Live Not Long
or Thick, but Hard
***SIGN*** Huh? Wait a second.
***SIGN*** What kind of story is starting up here?
***SIGN*** What about the gang in space? Who the hell is Dragonia?
***SIGN*** If that's what you're thinking, look forward to next week!
# 348 - Men Must Live Not Long Nor Thick, but Hard
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:05] (Flashback) K**
Men,
**[00:07] (Flashback) K**
I called you here for one reason:
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[00:11] (Flashback) K**
there is an issue causing
unrest in the court,
**[00:14] (Flashback) K**
and I felt the need to
discuss it immediately.
**[00:19] (Flashback) K**
I have heard all about it.
**[00:21] (Flashback) K**
Ever since I fell sick,
**[00:23] (Flashback) K**
the struggle for the right to succeed
me as king of Planet Okoku
**[00:28] (Flashback) K**
has split you all into two factions
**[00:30] (Flashback) K**
that are locked in an ugly
conflict over succession.
**[00:34] (Flashback) K**
This is all my fault for being weak.
**[00:40] (Flashback) K**
I don't have long left.
**[00:42] (Flashback) K**
So I must resolve this problem before I go.
**[00:47] (Flashback) Jii**
Your Highness, you needn't
trouble yourself with this.
**[00:51] (Flashback) Jii**
Our utmost desire is to see you remain
on the throne for as long as possible.
**[00:57] (Flashback) Jii**
Please leave the administration
to us and focus on recovering.
**[01:02] (Flashback) Jii**
Prince Hata is leading us
retainers in your stead.
**[01:08] (Flashback) Jii**
His kind heart, filled with
love for every living being,
**[01:13] (Flashback) Jii**
is propping us all up.
**[01:15] (Flashback) Jii**
He will surely be a wonderful king.
**[01:19] (Flashback) Dan**
Kindness?
**[01:21] (Flashback) Dan**
Nes, are you saying that
qualifies him to be king?
**[01:25] (Flashback) Dan**
Can a "kind" prince who ignores
national affairs to dote on animals
**[01:29] (Flashback) Dan**
really protect the subjects?
**[01:30] (Flashback) Jii**
Dan! You dare to insult the
prince in front of the king?!
**[01:34] (Flashback) Dan**
I'm prepared to sacrifice
my life to say this.
**[01:38] (Flashback) Dan**
Your Highness!
**[01:39] (Flashback) Dan**
Only Prince Barkas can lead
this country and its people!
**[01:44] (Flashback) Dan**
His acumen in military
strategy, his political savvy,
**[01:47] (Flashback) Dan**
and above all, his status as the eldest
son make him truly fit to be king!
**[01:51] (Flashback) Dan**
So why hasn't he been appointed successor?
**[01:54] (Flashback) Jii**
Dan, don't cause any more political
unrest than you already have.
**[01:57] (Flashback) Dan**
Shut up!
**[01:57] (Flashback) Dan**
You're just a hyena who wants
to leech off of Prince Hata!
**[02:01] (Flashback) Jii**
Hmph. You know very well why
he hasn't been made successor.
**[02:05] (Flashback) Jii**
Prince Barkas certainly is brilliant
and has a personality fit to be king.
**[02:11] (Flashback) Jii**
But there is one kingly quality that
he crucially loses out to Prince Hata on.
**[02:19] (Flashback) Jii**
That's right. He is tiny!
**[02:23] (Flashback) Jii**
Oh, pardon me. I forgot that
you're pretty small yourself.
**[02:27] (Flashback) Jii**
I mean the symbol of our
race's males and our pride:
***SIGN*** Peerinitis
**[02:30] (Flashback) Jii**
Peerinitis.
**[02:32] (Flashback) Jii**
Or, for short, Penis!
***SIGN*** Penis
**[02:34] (Flashback) Jii**
Since ancient times, a male's worth has
been decided by his forehead Penis's size,
**[02:39] (Flashback) Jii**
and we've placed utmost importance on it.
**[02:41] (Flashback) Jii**
Regardless of everything else,
the one with the bigger Penis is better.
**[02:44] (Flashback) Jii**
The one with the bigger
Penis is more popular.
**[02:46] (Flashback) Jii**
The one with the bigger Penis
has an easier time hailing taxis.
**[02:48] (Flashback) Jii**
The one with the bigger Penis
is a superior creature!
**[02:52] (Flashback) Jii**
The royal family is no exception.
**[02:55] (Flashback) Jii**
Even if he was born first,
even if he's hugely talented,
**[02:59] (Flashback) Jii**
one with a tiny Penis
has no right to be king!
**[03:05] (Flashback) Jii**
Because while hard work can
make up for a lack of talent,
**[03:08] (Flashback) Jii**
nothing can be done about Penis size!
**[03:11] (Flashback) Jii**
You want to ignore that tradition
and make a tiny man king?!
**[03:14] (Flashback) Jii**
Have some shame!
**[03:16] (Flashback) Dan**
H-He's not tiny! Even the prince
is average when erect...
**[03:19] (Flashback) G**
Dan, don't go there.
Don't bring up erections.
**[03:21] (Flashback) Jii**
If you bring that up, Prince Hata is
much bigger when he has a chub, too!
**[03:25] (Flashback) G**
Nes, don't go there. Don't bring up chubs.
**[03:28] (Flashback) Dan**
I'm saying that the tradition
is a blight on our race!
**[03:31] (Flashback) Dan**
Can one rule the country with one's Penis?
**[03:33] (Flashback) Dan**
Even if he has a small Penis, a talented
man will build a better country!
**[03:37] (Flashback) Dan**
Who cares about a Penis?
What is a Penis, anyway?!
**[03:41] (Flashback) Jii**
Are you insulting His Highness?
**[03:43] (Flashback) Jii**
He became king solely through
the size of his Penis!
**[03:46] (Flashback) Jii**
If you took his Penis away,
what would he have left?
**[03:48] (Flashback) Jii**
Just water, that's what!
**[03:49] (Flashback) Dan**
You're the one insulting him!
**[03:51] (Flashback) Dan**
His Highness has plenty of
virtues aside from his Penis.
**[03:53] (Flashback) Jii**
What are they? Enlighten us!
**[03:54] (Flashback) Dan**
U-Uh, you know, he has an
easier time hailing taxis!
**[03:57] (Flashback) Jii**
That's because he has a big Penis!
**[03:59] (Flashback) Jii**
His Highness has nothing but his Penis!
He has to stake it all on his Penis!
**[04:02] (Flashback) Jii**
Turn it around, and it means even a blockhead
can be competent if he has a big Penis.
**[04:07] (Flashback) Jii**
As long as he has a big Penis,
everything else will work itself out!
**[04:09] (Flashback) Jii**
Right, Your Highness?
**[04:13] (Flashback) Jii**
Your Highness!
**[04:14] (Flashback) Jii**
Hang in there, Peni— Your Highness!
**[04:17] (Flashback) Dan**
Call a doctor!
**[04:20] (Flashback) Jii**
Your Highness, please tell us before you go!
**[04:23] (Flashback) Dan**
Who will be the next king?
**[04:24] (Flashback) Jii**
The one with the big Penis?
**[04:26] (Flashback) Dan**
The one who has a smaller
Penis but is capable?
**[04:28] (Flashback) Jii**
Big Penis?
**[04:29] (Flashback) Dan**
Smaller Penis but capable?
**[04:30] (Flashback) Bo**
Your Highness!
**[04:34] (Flashback) K**
Th-The one... who has a big
Penis... and is capable...
**[04:45] (Flashback) Bark**
I suppose Father could
never forget about Brother.
**[04:51] (Flashback) Bark**
Our elder brother,
**[04:53] (Flashback) Bark**
First Prince of Planet Okoku, Dragonia.
**[04:58] (Flashback) Bark**
A hero who was hailed as
the Nine-Dragon Prince.
**[05:01] (Flashback) Bark**
At the young age of five, his Penis
was as long as a dragon's whisker,
***SIGN*** 5 years old
**[05:05] (Flashback) Bark**
and his talents threatened to pierce
the heavens, like a dragon's horns.
**[05:11] (Flashback) Bark**
They said that the country was
sure to prosper if he became king.
**[05:18] (Flashback) Bark**
But the massive size of his
Penis led to tragedy,
**[05:21] (Flashback) Bark**
and he left us all behind.
**[05:24] (Flashback) Bark**
That's what you call a king.
**[05:27] (Flashback) Hata**
Th-That's not true, Brother!
**[05:30] (Flashback) Hata**
You're just as good! It's just, your Penis...
**[05:35] (Flashback) Hata**
Sorry.
**[05:36] (Flashback) Bark**
Don't say that, Hata.
**[05:38] (Flashback) Bark**
In these peaceful times, a kind man
like you is better suited to be king.
**[05:44] (Flashback) Bark**
But if I remain here, that
peace won't last long.
**[05:49] (Flashback) Bark**
Fighting will surely break
out over the throne.
**[05:52] (Flashback) Bark**
Become a kind king who loves
all living beings, Hata.
**[06:01] (Flashback) Hata**
Brother...
**[06:06] Hata**
Brother...
**[06:09] Hata**
Close shave! I died for a moment just now!
**[06:13] Hata**
What's this? What's going
on right now, again?
**[06:15] G**
Unhand the prince, you knave!
**[06:18] Kat**
Prince Half-Wit... I'd heard
that you love animals,
**[06:22] Kat**
but to think you'd build an ark
to keep Earth's species alive...
**[06:27] Kat**
I see you in a new light now.
**[06:28] Kat**
But there's something
you should keep in mind.
**[06:31] Kat**
Earth also has savage beasts
that you can't handle.
**[06:35] Kat**
Send word to your country at once!
**[06:38] Kat**
"The prince's life is in danger!
**[06:40] Kat**
Gather up all the troops in the
country and rush to his aid!
**[06:45] Kat**
The entire army of Planet Okoku must
make the prince's wish come true.
**[06:49] Kat**
We must rise up to protect Earth
and stop the Liberation Army!"
**[06:54] Sak**
Zura! You...
**[06:56] Sak**
In this desperate situation,
**[06:57] Sak**
*are you trying to find Earth an ally?*
**[07:00] Hat**
Are you out of your mind?!
**[07:01] Hat**
You want us to fight the
entire universe for you lot?!
**[07:05] Kat**
I'm not telling you to fight.
**[07:07] Kat**
The Liberation Army is
currently rooted to Earth.
**[07:11] Kat**
They think it has no allies
across the universe.
**[07:14] Kat**
What do you think will happen if
an allied army suddenly shows up?
***SIGN*** Liberation Army
**[07:19] Kat**
All you need to do is draw
the enemy's attention.
***SIGN*** Okoku Army
**[07:22] Kat**
After that, you're free to flee if you want.
***SIGN*** Not Zura,
Katsura
**[07:24] Kat**
We'll take that opportunity to take over
the Liberation Army's HQ and stop the war.
**[07:30] Kat**
This way, you can protect
all of Earth's species.
**[07:33] Hata**
Screw you! Our own species
could die out from this!
**[07:36] Hata**
Besides, why should I care
about Earth's survival?
**[07:39] Hata**
I was just building a collection!
Who the hell brought this stray dog in?!
**[07:43] Jii**
Your orders were to take in species
from Earth at random, Prince.
**[07:47] Hata**
Can't you tell the difference
**[07:48] Hata**
between species that are better off dead
and ones that need protection, geezer?!
**[07:51] Jii**
Understood, Prince.
**[07:54] Jii**
Hey, get rid of the Joi Rebills
along with that white pig.
**[07:57] Hata**
Sorry about that. Protect the pig, okay?
**[07:59] Hata**
The pig can live, don't you think?
**[08:02] Jii**
Don't you get it?
**[08:03] Jii**
Right now, your life isn't in the hands
of the Joi Rebills or the Liberation Army,
**[08:08] Jii**
but this old man here!
**[08:10] Jii**
Where's your reply, pig?
**[08:12] Hata**
O-Oink!
**[08:13] Jii**
Hear that, men?
**[08:15] Jii**
To protect our country,
the prince is acting like a pig
**[08:18] Jii**
and telling you to shoot him and the enemy.
**[08:21] Jii**
Pull the trigger.
**[08:22] Hata**
Nothing's changed!
**[08:24] Mad**
That stray dog
**[08:26] Mad**
ain't the only one in here.
**[08:30] Mad**
Why not get rid of it along
with the baa-ing white goat?
**[08:35] Hata**
You!
**[08:36] Kat**
You sure took your time,
Chief of Immigration.
**[08:39] Mad**
Yeah. Sorry to keep you waiting.
**[08:42] Mad**
I had to get up from clinging to
the ground and drag myself here.
**[08:46] Mad**
Cut me some slack.
**[08:47] Mad**
A loser underdog has his own way of flying.
**[08:52] Mad**
I munched on dog food and did the
dog paddle to get all the way here.
**[08:57] Mad**
Now, shall we be on our way, Master?
**[09:00] Kat**
It's time for a walk.
**[09:02] Jii**
No! I don't want to die, but I don't want
to fight the Liberation Army, either!
**[09:06] Hata**
Serves you right! This is what
you get for getting carried away!
**[09:08] Jii**
It's all your fault for bringing this guy
in to get your revenge, Prince Hog!
**[09:12] Hata**
Hasegawa-san! Kill that geezer already!
**[09:14] Jii**
Hey, Joi Rebills! I'll work with
you, so kill that pig prince!
**[09:17] Hata**
Somebody shut that geezer up! Fire!
**[09:20] Jii**
Go ahead and fire! But make
sure to kill that pig after me!
**[09:23] Hata**
Fire, now!
**[09:24] Jii**
Open fire!
**[09:32] Dan**
I opened fire,
**[09:34] Dan**
just as you ordered.
**[09:37] Hata**
Dan, you!
**[09:46] Kat**
Gunfire?
**[09:47] Kat**
Zura, what's going on?!
**[09:49] Kat**
Zura!
**[09:54] Dan**
I have waited a long time for this.
**[09:57] Dan**
I've waited ever since you
people exiled Prince Barkas
**[10:02] Dan**
for this moment when I could wipe out
the morons with nothing but big Penises
**[10:05] Dan**
and establish a country of tiny ones.
**[10:08] Dan**
If we joined forces with Earth,
**[10:11] Dan**
not only would our country get wiped
out, but also our entire planet.
**[10:15] Dan**
At least be of use to the
country with your dying breath,
**[10:18] Dan**
by disappearing from this world
along with your incompetent Penises.
**[10:21] Kat**
Elizabeth... Hey, Elizabeth!
**[10:24] Dan**
But before you go, I have
something to ask you.
**[10:29] Dan**
Why did you stay a prince even
after you took over the country?
**[10:33] Dan**
Why'd you leave the throne empty
instead of becoming king?!
**[10:41] Shi**
*But you do have a king.*
**[10:43] Shi**
*A capable man with a huge Penis,*
**[10:46] Shi**
*the Nine-Dragon Prince, Dragonia.*
**[10:49] Shi**
*Back then, you said this...*
**[10:54] (Flashback) Hata**
Brother, he's right here.
**[10:58] (Flashback) Hata**
With his big Penis and vast
talents... He's right here.
**[11:02] (Flashback) Hata**
I have a big Penis,
**[11:04] (Flashback) Hata**
and you're overflowing with talent.
**[11:07] (Flashback) Hata**
If we work together, we can be Dragonia.
**[11:11] (Flashback) Hata**
So I'll remain a prince and wait.
**[11:18] Shi**
"Wait for the other half of me and Dragonia."
**[11:24] Shi**
*Dan, stand down!*
**[11:26] Shi**
*Who do you think that man is?*
**[11:29] Shi**
*Who do you think* we *are?*
**[11:37] Shi**
*It's the return of the king.*
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[13:19] Shi**
*Leaving my kid brother alone,*
**[13:21] Shi**
*I left the country*
**[13:24] Shi**
* so that the peaceful country would*
* have a kind king befitting it,*
**[13:32] Shi**
* believing that there'd be a country*
* out there that suited me more.*
**[13:50] (Flashback) En**
Oh? I didn't know our lukewarm
neighbors had a fiery man like you.
**[13:56] (Flashback) En**
Who are you?
**[14:00] (Flashback) Shi**
On a battlefield, both princes and laymen
fall to the ground equally as corpses.
**[14:08] (Flashback) Shi**
Isn't that right, Prince Ensho?
**[14:11] Shi**
I cast aside my name,
my status, and my Penis,
**[14:14] Shi**
and kept fighting in search
of a country of my own.
**[14:18] Shi**
But the place at the end of my journey
**[14:22] Shi**
*was here after all.*
**[14:25] Shi**
*My little brother, Hata.*
**[14:28] Shi**
* Seeing you still waiting for me*
* to return made me realize*
**[14:32] Shi**
*that I was merely running away.*
**[14:36] Shi**
* The battlefield I belonged on was*
* in front of my eyes all along.*
**[14:42] Shi**
Hata, forgive me. I made you fight
all by yourself for so long.
**[14:48] Shi**
But I will not run away anymore.
**[14:52] Shi**
Even if standing beside my kid brother
with a big Penis covers me in disgrace,
**[14:58] Shi**
even if the responsibility of being a
great prince's kid brother crushes me,
**[15:04] Shi**
I will fight alongside you!
**[15:07] Shi**
Exposing this tiny Penis for all to see!
**[15:12] Shi**
Men, we are the great Okoku Kingdom's king,
**[15:16] Shi**
Dragonia!
**[15:20] Jii**
P-Prince?
**[15:22] Dan**
No way... He was alive?
**[15:25] Shi**
*Dan, you people once tried to make me king.*
**[15:30] Shi**
Could you lower your guns
out of respect for me?
**[15:36] Shi**
* This is no time to be*
* fighting over Penis sizes.*
**[15:40] Shi**
* Both tiny and big must join*
* Penises and fight together.*
**[15:44] Shi**
* To that end, the big Hata and*
* the tiny me will become king!*
**[15:49] Shi**
* Let's work together and take*
* down the Liberation—*
**[15:52] Dan**
Don't be fooled!
**[15:53] Dan**
He died a long time ago!
**[15:55] Dan**
Exorcise the specter that threatens
to lead our tiny Penis faction astray!
**[15:58] Shi**
*You can't believe, Dan?*
**[16:00] Shi**
* Then come see me! I'll show you my*
* Penis that's just as tiny as yours!*
**[16:05] Dan**
Wh-What are you doing? Hurry up and fire.
**[16:07] G**
B-But Minister, that huge Penis is definitely...
**[16:12] Shi**
*Huge penis?*
**[16:13] Shi**
*Huh? Who are you talking about?*
**[16:22] Kat**
E-Elizabeth...
**[16:24] G**
The hell is that?
**[16:25] G**
Something outrageous came out of
Elizabeth-san after he got knocked out!
**[16:29] Jii**
Prince, you might not remember
because you were so young,
**[16:34] Jii**
but I have never once forgotten the sight.
**[16:39] Jii**
That giant Penis that looks
like a dragon's whisker
**[16:42] Jii**
definitely belongs to the eldest of
the three princes of Planet Okoku,
**[16:46] Jii**
the one who was considered
to have died in an accident,
**[16:49] Jii**
the legendary Nine-Dragon Prince, Dragonia!
**[16:56] ---**
*That's* what you meant?!
**[16:58] Shi**
*There was another prince there, too?*
**[17:00] Shi**
*Was nobody listening to me at all?*
**[17:03] Shi**
*Hey, Hata? Dan?*
**[17:04] Shi**
*Are you listening to me?*
**[17:05] Dan**
Fire! Hurry up and fire!
***SIGN*** Eight One Two Seven Nine Three Six Five Four
***SIGN*** One
***SIGN*** Two
***SIGN*** Three
***SIGN*** Four
***SIGN*** Five
***SIGN*** Six
***SIGN*** Seven
***SIGN*** Eight
***SIGN*** Nine
***SIGN*** One
***SIGN*** Two
***SIGN*** Three
***SIGN*** Four
***SIGN*** Five
***SIGN*** Six
***SIGN*** Seven
***SIGN*** Eight
***SIGN*** Nine
***SIGN*** One
***SIGN*** Two
***SIGN*** Three
***SIGN*** Four
***SIGN*** Five
***SIGN*** Six
***SIGN*** Seven
***SIGN*** Eight
***SIGN*** Nine
**[17:14] [SONG] Sign**
Nine-Headed Dragon Thrash
**[17:15] [SONG] Sign**
Nine-Headed
Dragon Thrash!
***SIGN*** One
***SIGN*** Two
***SIGN*** Three
***SIGN*** Four
***SIGN*** Five
***SIGN*** Six
***SIGN*** Seven
***SIGN*** Eight
***SIGN*** Nine
**[17:21] Jii**
What power!
**[17:23] Jii**
A technique most worthy of Nine-Dragon,
said to possess nine Penis heads.
**[17:27] Hata**
Gramps, forget a worthy Nine-Dragon
technique, isn't that just a rip-off?
**[17:30] Hata**
Isn't it just Nine-Headed Dragon Trash?
**[17:34] Jii**
You're alive, Prince Dragonia?
**[17:37] Hata**
You're letting them out?
**[17:38] Jii**
You look different now, but I've never
forgotten how your Penis looked.
**[17:42] Hata**
Hey, Gramps! You call it a Penis,
but it might actually be one!
**[17:45] Hata**
It might be the one that
hangs from the crotch!
**[17:48] Kat**
Elizabeth, you...
**[17:55] Penis**
Katsura-san, I've always lived through
life not knowing anything about myself.
**[17:59] Hata**
Uh, Gramps? The Penis is talking!
**[18:01] Penis**
Who was I, and where was I born?
**[18:04] Penis**
I've lived my life never thinking
about that or questioning it.
**[18:08] Hata**
Hey, Gramps! Which one's Brother here?
**[18:11] Hata**
Which one's the actual body?
Is this what he was like?
**[18:13] Penis**
But when I hit my head hard just
now, I feel like I caught a glimpse.
**[18:18] Penis**
I think I once had an accident
so bad that I forgot who I was.
**[18:26] Penis**
And while I was on the brink of death...
***SIGN*** From now on, you're one of us.
**[18:50] Penis**
I don't recall the details.
**[18:53] Penis**
But there is just one thing
I've clearly remembered.
**[18:57] Penis**
My name is Dragonia.
**[18:59] Hata**
Dragonia, my foot!
**[19:01] Hata**
What was that flashback?
**[19:02] Hata**
The one that showed up midway
looked more like you!
**[19:05] Hata**
Which one was you, and how did Brother
end up like this from that situation?
**[19:09] Jii**
I don't really understand all of it,
**[19:12] Jii**
but since his Penis is big,
does it really matter?
**[19:14] Hata**
Are you looking at nothing but
the Penis, you shitty geezer?
**[19:17] Jii**
Prince Dragonia!
**[19:18] Jii**
We have eagerly awaited your
return, the return of our king!
**[19:22] G**
Prince Hata! Are you all right?
**[19:25] G**
What happened here?
**[19:28] G**
Wait! That Penis...
**[19:29] Hata**
Hey, you guys try talking
some sense into him, too.
**[19:32] Hata**
Gramps is saying this monster
Penis is Prince Dragonia.
**[19:36] G**
Our King, please give us the order
to shoot that insolent pig to death.
**[19:40] Hata**
A big Penis is enough to get you to
switch sides? You guys are way too easy!
**[19:44] Jii**
Could you please return home
**[19:46] Jii**
and rebuild the country that
the stupid prince ruined?
**[19:49] Hata**
Who're you calling the stupid prince?
**[19:51] Penis**
Dragonia doesn't exist within me anymore.
***SIGN*** That's just an empty name.
**[19:57] Penis**
I'm not Dragonia from Planet Okoku anymore.
***SIGN*** I've become Elizabeth from Earth.
**[20:02] Penis**
So I have no right to be king.
**[20:06] Penis**
But even if I can't be king,
**[20:08] Penis**
I can fight with you and help
you take back your king.
**[20:13] Penis**
They may be lacking as kings by themselves,
**[20:16] Penis**
but together...
**[20:17] Penis**
No, if they have your support,
**[20:20] Penis**
I'm sure they'll be splendid kings.
**[20:23] Penis**
So would you please fight alongside us?
**[20:30] Penis**
Earth is all alone in the universe,
and I want you to be its friend!
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Men Must Live Not Long
Nor Thick, but Hard
**[20:50] G**
The path! The enemy's interference
has split up our force!
**[20:57] G**
The squad in the rear is
being ambushed by the enemy.
**[21:00] G**
Shall we go back to help?
**[21:03] Dak**
No need.
**[21:05] Dak**
It's mere child's play that must be ignored.
**[21:07] Dak**
Desperate schemes can't overturn
the difference in numbers.
**[21:11] Dak**
Let's go!
**[21:19] Dak**
Oh? I thought it was just
a ploy to slow us down,
**[21:25] Dak**
but they're seriously out to stop us, huh?
**[21:31] Cat**
Looks like it's started.
**[21:33] Oto**
Are they dividing the enemy
***SIGN*** Kabuki District
***SIGN*** Divide
***SIGN*** Oniwaban
***SIGN*** Oniwaban
***SIGN*** Shinsengumi
**[21:35] Oto**
and trying to weaken them
before they get here, perhaps?
***SIGN*** Kabuki District First
**[21:40] Oto**
It's time.
**[21:42] Oto**
I hope you're all ready.
**[21:47] G**
Detected enemy approach!
**[21:51] All**
Let's go!
**[21:55] Oto**
Open combat!
**[22:05] Shin**
Gin-san?!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] Shin**
Wait! Time out!
**[23:41] Shin**
We're on your side! We're Odd Jobs!
**[23:44] Sai**
I hope you're prepared to
have your balls plucked out!
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Ogres Are Weak Against Tiny Heroes
Like the Inch-High Samurai
***SIGN*** The Liberation Army reaches the Kabuki District,
***SIGN*** and the residents must all fight together.
***SIGN*** The back-and-forth battle at the Kabuki District begins!
***SIGN*** And you may have been suddenly taken out, but stand up and fight, Gintoki!
**[24:05] ---**
Thank you all for coming.
# 349 - Ogres Are Weak Against Tiny Heroes Like the Inch-High Samurai
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Ogres Are Weak Against Tiny Heroes
Like the Inch-High Samurai
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:42] G**
The path! The enemy's interference
has split up our force!
**[01:49] G**
The squad in the rear is
being ambushed by the enemy.
**[01:52] G**
Shall we go back to help?
**[01:54] Dak**
No need.
**[01:57] Dak**
It's mere child's play that must be ignored.
**[01:59] Dak**
Desperate schemes can't overturn
the difference in numbers.
**[02:03] Dak**
Let's go!
**[02:11] Dak**
Oh? I thought it was just
a ploy to slow us down,
**[02:17] Dak**
but they're seriously out to stop us, huh?
**[02:23] Cat**
Looks like it's started.
**[02:25] Oto**
Are they dividing the enemy
***SIGN*** Kabuki District
***SIGN*** Divide
***SIGN*** Oniwaban
***SIGN*** Oniwaban
***SIGN*** Shinsengumi
**[02:27] Oto**
and trying to weaken them
before they get here, perhaps?
***SIGN*** Kabuki District First
**[02:32] Oto**
It's time.
**[02:34] Oto**
I hope you're all ready.
**[02:38] G**
Detected enemy approach!
**[02:43] All**
Let's go!
**[02:46] Oto**
Open combat!
**[02:54] Shin**
Gin-san?!
**[02:56] Shin**
Wait! Time out!
**[02:59] Shin**
We're on your side! We're Odd Jobs!
**[03:02] Gin**
My eyeball. My eyeball fell out.
**[03:03] Gin**
Grab it, please!
**[03:06] Tae**
Shin-chan?
**[03:07] Tae**
Wait, everyone.
**[03:09] Shin**
Sis!
**[03:10] Tae**
Thank goodness. You're all okay.
**[03:12] Gin**
Do I *look* okay to you?!
**[03:14] Gin**
It's like I've been pounded in
the head with a barbed-wire bat!
**[03:18] Gin**
Apologize to me and Glenn,
you Walking Violence broad—
**[03:22] Shin**
Sis! Can't you hear me asking you to stop?!
**[03:24] Gin**
My ball. My ball fell out.
**[03:26] Gin**
Grab it, please!
**[03:26] Tae**
It's okay. I'm throwing
these with my bare hands.
**[03:28] Kag**
Not picking this one up.
**[03:29] Shin**
Like hell it's okay!
**[03:31] Tae**
Right now, the Kabuki District
is an impregnable fortress!
**[03:35] Tae**
Stay away if you don't want to get hurt!
**[03:38] Shin**
Say that to the enemy, not your allies!
**[03:39] Shin**
And how long are you going
to keep hurling those rocks?
**[03:41] Tae**
That's not what I mean! The enemy's
already there! You need to run!
**[03:46] Kag**
Out of the frying pan and into
the fire! Look for an entrance!
**[03:51] Gin**
Who's that kicking my ball?!
**[03:53] Tet**
This way, Shinpachi-kun!
**[03:55] Shin**
Tetsuko-san!
**[03:56] Tet**
Just wait. I'll open up right away.
**[03:58] Tet**
Here we go...
**[04:00] Tet**
Open, Hell's Gate!
**[04:08] Tet**
All right!
**[04:08] Shin**
"All right," my ass!
What the hell is "Hell's Gate"?
**[04:11] Tet**
Hell's Gate is a weapon I designed
that beckons the enemy to hell.
**[04:15] Shin**
Don't ask someone to use
such a dangerous entrance!
**[04:19] Tet**
Once you go in, you can never get out.
**[04:21] Tet**
It's a weapon that's both an entrance
and not an entrance at the same time.
**[04:23] Shin**
Don't go building such
misleading pieces of trash!
**[04:26] Shin**
Ack!
**[04:27] Tet**
There's another entrance over
there if you want to use it.
**[04:29] Shin**
Where?
**[04:31] Tet**
Heaven's Gate.
**[04:32] Tet**
It's a weapon that beckons enemies to heaven
and is both an entrance and not an entrance.
**[04:36] Shin**
It's the same thing either way!
**[04:38] Shin**
Gin-san! I can't!
**[04:40] Shin**
There aren't any entrances anywhere!
**[04:41] Gin**
Hold up!
**[04:42] Shin**
Wait, you're still chasing after your ball?!
**[04:44] Ago**
This way, Pako.
**[04:45] Gin**
Y-You're...
**[04:47] Gin**
A... A-Antonio!
**[04:49] Ago**
It's Agomi! You only got the "A" right!
**[04:51] Ago**
I'll open up right now. Just wait.
**[04:53] Gin**
Th-Thanks!
**[04:57] Ago**
You're finally home, Pako.
**[04:58] Ago**
Welcome...
**[04:59] Ago**
to the Morocco Gate.
**[05:01] Shin**
There's an entrance to an entirely
different world over there!
**[05:04] Gin**
Give back my little boy!
**[05:06] Gin**
You want money? Because crown jewel?
**[05:08] Gin**
I'll arrange money somehow,
**[05:09] Gin**
so carefully put my boy in a
bag and soak it in cold water!
**[05:13] Gin**
Please!
**[05:15] Shin**
Behind you!
**[05:17] Sai**
I don't know if you guys came to
pluck Earth for yourselves or what,
**[05:22] Sai**
but I hope you're prepared to
have your balls plucked out!
**[05:28] Shin**
In the end, that's another Hell's Gate!
**[05:30] Shin**
Pull yourself together, Gin-san!
**[05:33] Kag**
Hey, Gin-chan! Shinpachi!
**[05:36] Kag**
There's an entrance over here!
**[05:39] Gin**
Don't be so loud! The enemy will hear you!
**[05:41] Shin**
Kagura-chan!
**[05:42] Gin**
Kagura!
**[05:45] Kag**
Oh? Who might these boys be?
**[05:49] Kag**
I don't remember asking for
these ruffians, Kyoshiro.
**[05:53] Kyo**
We're truly sorry, Kagura-sama.
**[05:56] Kyo**
Members of the Liberation Army,
Takamagahara here is a host club,
**[06:00] Kyo**
a place to entertain ladies.
**[06:02] Kyo**
I'm sorry, but we don't entertain men,
**[06:05] Kyo**
especially those who bring
in such dangerous items.
**[06:09] G**
The hell are these guys
talking about? Get 'em!
**[06:12] Kag**
Enough, Kyoshiro.
**[06:15] Kag**
If they want in so badly, we just have
to make them acceptable for entry.
**[06:20] Kag**
Five Koronamin Cs for these boys.
**[06:23] Kag**
In return, confiscate those
evil things they're carrying.
**[06:27] Sai**
Five Koronamin Cs and five d*cks
**[06:31] Sai**
coming right up.
**[06:34] Shin**
Nothing's changed from before!
**[06:37] Shin**
And why are you collapsing with them?!
**[06:40] Gin**
Somehow, I can understand their pain.
**[06:45] Shin**
Don't make it sound so profound.
**[06:49] HB**
Use this.
**[06:51] Shin**
Kozenigata-san!
**[06:53] Gin**
You're telling us to climb using this?
**[06:55] HB**
Don't worry. The queen and I...
I mean, we'll pull you up from here.
***SIGN*** Super S and Super M
You can meet your true self
**[07:01] Shin**
Did you just say the queen?
**[07:02] HB**
The rope may be a bit slippery, though.
**[07:05] Shin**
Why is it slippery?
***SIGN*** Adult Society
Super S and Super M
You can meet your true self
**[07:07] HB**
If you can't handle that,
tie it to your body.
**[07:10] HB**
If possible, try the turtle-shell knot.
**[07:13] HB**
That might help make her more potent.
**[07:16] Shin**
Wait, where are you?
What were you doing up until now?
**[07:20] HB**
Anyway, just trust me and her...
**[07:24] HB**
Trust this revolting pig!
**[07:27] Gin**
Hey, I just heard a thwack! You okay?
**[07:29] HB**
Once you've grabbed the
rope, try not to move.
**[07:32] HB**
Please don't flail around!
**[07:34] HB**
Ready? One, two...
**[07:37] HB**
Ow!
**[07:38] Shin**
Hey! Are you okay?!
**[07:40] Shin**
Why does it seem like you're tied up, too?
You're connected to this rope, aren't you?
**[07:44] HB**
Don't worry! We also tied it
to a pig so we wouldn't let go!
**[07:48] Shin**
Uh, that's not what it looked like, though.
**[07:50] Shin**
It was an extremely complicated
way to tie a rope!
**[07:53] HB**
My queen, this really won't work.
**[07:56] HB**
The pig's going to get ripped to shreds.
**[07:58] HB**
Look, it's starting to go purple.
**[08:00] HB**
I did say I wanted to try the craziest
Z course before Earth was destroyed...
**[08:05] Gin**
Hey! What do you mean, Z course?
**[08:07] HB**
"You have two balls, so pull one guy
up with each"? That's impossible!
**[08:13] Gin**
What the hell is this rope
tied to on the other end?
**[08:15] Gin**
What kinky stuff are you getting into?
**[08:16] HB**
Oink! Oink! Oink!
***SIGN*** Super S and Super M
You can meet your true self
**[08:20] Gin**
All I hear is thwacks and oinks now!
**[08:22] Gin**
What happened?
**[08:23] Gin**
The enemy's almost here! Say something!
**[08:26] HB**
Oink!
**[08:27] Gin**
Something other than "oink"!
**[08:29] Sai**
Got you covered.
**[08:31] Sai**
If you want to be shredded so badly...
**[08:34] HB**
Oink!
**[08:34] Sai**
I'll shred you all you want!
**[08:36] HB**
Oink!
**[08:40] G**
What is this?
**[08:40] G**
What's with these guys?
**[08:43] G**
What's with this town?
**[08:45] Dak**
I figured it was nothing more
than a resident-defended town,
**[08:48] Dak**
but it seems they have more backbone than
soldiers who can't even fight without guns.
**[08:55] Dak**
But stronger bones mean
nothing when faced with us.
**[09:00] Dak**
They will be reduced to powder all the same.
**[09:10] Dak**
Of course, that goes for this metal town, too.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Town
***SIGN*** Kabuki District First
**[09:33] Shin**
He destroyed the gate...
**[09:37] Shin**
with just one strike!
**[10:00] Zen**
Yeah, you really can't stop a tidal wave
of soldiers with cheap tricks alone.
**[10:06] Kon**
We can't hold them off! The enemy's
going to reach the Kabuki District!
**[10:08] Hij**
Don't think! Just focus on cutting
down as many as you can for now!
**[10:12] Hij**
I've sent another squad already!
**[10:14] Hij**
*But who knows how useful they will be?*
**[10:18] Hij**
* Can those massive monsters*
* really be stopped by humans?*
**[10:48] Dak**
Break! Destroy! Smash!
**[10:51] Dak**
Reduce this town to rubble!
**[10:53] Dak**
That rubble will form the path we walk!
**[10:56] G**
Run away!
**[10:59] G**
Those guys are coming here!
**[11:01] Hana**
Otae-chan!
**[11:02] Tae**
Oryo, Hana-chan!
**[11:04] Hana**
The catapult was broken.
**[11:06] Or**
Do we have any other traps?
Otherwise they'll get to us!
**[11:11] Tae**
Take them somewhere safe.
**[11:13] Or**
Otae!
**[11:14] Tae**
Sorry. There is nothing you can do anymore.
**[11:19] Or**
Otae...
**[11:20] G**
Hurry! If we want to
escape, it's now or never!
**[11:23] Or**
Wait! Otae, you come, too!
**[11:31] Tae**
Run!
**[11:51] Sai**
They're really giving me, Saigo of the
White Loincloth, such a hard time...
**[11:57] Sai**
How many of these have gotten into town?!
**[12:00] Gin**
Beats me!
**[12:01] Gin**
But if we keep fighting the enemies outside,
the ones inside will crush the town.
**[12:06] Gin**
And if we keep fighting the enemies
inside, the ones outside will overrun us.
**[12:10] Sai**
So it's a matter of preference?
**[12:13] Gin**
I'll handle the ones left over.
**[12:15] Sai**
Are you sure you want to let me choose?
**[12:18] Gin**
Our lives will be in danger either way.
**[12:21] Gin**
We used to be called Saigo of the
White Loincloth and the White Yaksha,
**[12:26] Gin**
but at some point, we stopped being white.
**[12:29] Gin**
We're two peas in a pod who
both got soiled by this town.
**[12:34] Gin**
If someone who was plain white can be
stained in this town's colors and die,
**[12:37] Gin**
it doesn't matter to which
side, don't you think?
**[12:41] Sai**
Our answers are all the same.
**[12:45] Sai**
We refuse to pick either,
**[12:47] Sai**
and instead choose to believe in a
miracle that will let us all survive.
**[13:01] Tae**
Come on, get out this way.
**[13:14] Or**
Otae!
**[13:17] Or**
Huh?
**[13:23] Kyu**
Don't touch her.
**[13:25] Kyu**
She's important to me.
Keep your hands off of her!
**[13:37] Or**
K-Kyubei-san! Otae!
**[13:40] Kyu**
This way! Quickly!
**[13:45] Kyu**
Hurry!
**[13:46] Otae**
Kyu-chan.
**[13:48] Otae**
I believed you would come.
**[13:52] Kyu**
Sorry I kept you waiting.
**[13:55] Kyu**
I actually wanted to rush
to your aid immediately.
**[13:58] Kyu**
I wanted to take you away from this planet.
**[14:01] Kyu**
But I decided back then...
**[14:04] Kyu**
that the next time I dragged you by the hand,
**[14:07] Kyu**
I must be capable of taking
your smile along, too.
**[14:11] Kyu**
That I'd be the kind of strong man
and gentle woman who could do that.
**[14:16] Kyu**
So now, I'm going to take
you away once again...
**[14:20] Kyu**
Along with this world you love so much!
**[14:33] Bin**
Good grief. You're being awfully
greedy this time, Kyubei.
**[14:37] Tae**
Binbokusai-sama!
**[14:39] Bin**
If you take so many brides,
you won't last very long.
**[14:45] Bin**
But playing along with a grandchild's whims,
playing along with our master's whims,
**[14:50] Bin**
is also our family's duty, huh?
**[14:52] E4**
Indeed!
**[14:54] Tou**
That's our job as the Yagyu Elite Four!
**[15:01] G**
Damn, they just won't give up.
**[15:04] G**
Switch to a perimeter formation!
**[15:09] Ago**
This is bad!
**[15:10] Ago**
The other gates are undermanned now.
**[15:12] Ago**
If they attack all of them at once,
we'll be overrun in an instant!
**[15:19] G**
Wh-What's this?
**[15:23] Oto**
It's the Yagyu Family
and the town volunteers!
**[15:31] Kag**
Gin-chan!
**[15:35] Gin**
Took you awfully long.
**[15:38] Kyu**
Yeah, because we were waiting.
**[15:42] Kyu**
Waiting for this moment when our
swords would take a silver glint.
**[15:46] Kyu**
All the students of the Yagyu Chinkage
Style and the Chinko Volunteer Squad
**[15:51] Kyu**
will hereby assist Odd Jobs Gin-chan!
**[15:54] Kyu**
Let's go!
**[15:59] Gin**
You did well to gather so many.
**[16:01] Gin**
Shows the Yagyu Family's might, huh?
**[16:04] Kyu**
I didn't do anything.
**[16:06] Tou**
No! The young master's passionate
speech shot us all through the heart.
**[16:10] Tou**
I have that heroic address
recorded right here...
**[16:10] Shin**
Hey, watch out!
**[16:13] Tou**
My recording of the young master!
**[16:16] Sui**
But if I'm fighting the entire universe,
**[16:21] Sui**
it seems I'll be making many women cry.
**[16:24] Its**
No woman will cry if a penis face dies.
**[16:27] Sui**
Who are you calling penis face?!
**[16:29] Its**
I'll be the only one crying.
**[16:31] Sui**
You'll cry for me?!
**[16:32] Nish**
Victory or defeat doesn't matter.
**[16:35] Nish**
We haven't had such an exciting
battle since back then!
**[16:39] Bin**
Indeed. That fight sure was fun, huh, kid?
**[16:43] Gin**
Not for me!
**[16:45] Gin**
Do you have any idea how many ribs I broke?!
**[16:47] Bin**
The Yagyu Family being hailed as
the Shogun Family's instructors
**[16:51] Bin**
is a thing of the past now.
**[16:54] Bin**
Eventually, the world will forget
all about the way of the sword.
**[16:58] Bin**
But before the end,
**[17:01] Bin**
the heavens granted us a battlefield.
**[17:05] Bin**
We have honed our swords all for this moment!
**[17:10] Nish**
All right! Here we go!
**[17:21] Tou**
Nishino?
**[17:22] Sui**
Why, you...
**[17:45] Bin**
Hang in there.
**[17:53] Kyu**
Grandfather!
**[17:53] Gin**
Kyubei!
**[17:58] Dak**
What are you playing at?
**[18:00] Dak**
Why do I smell a female among you?
**[18:06] Shin**
Gin-san! Kyubei-san!
**[18:08] Gin**
Ow... I'm fine. Something cushioned me.
**[18:11] Gin**
Huh? Why do I smell a female scent...
**[18:17] Shin**
Uh, that attack's way more dangerous!
**[18:19] Dak**
You have kids, too?
**[18:21] Dak**
What do you people think a battlefield is?
**[18:25] Dak**
This is no playground!
**[18:27] Dak**
Don't defile this holy ritual that
men stake their lives and honor on!
**[18:33] Kyu**
You're the ones who don't get it.
**[18:36] Kyu**
War is an act that affects men,
women, and children equally
**[18:40] Kyu**
and reduces them all to ashes.
**[18:43] Kyu**
Surely you didn't start this war unprepared
to swing your clubs at babies and kids.
**[18:53] Kyu**
Surely you're not standing
before me unprepared
**[18:57] Kyu**
to be cut down by women or children!
**[19:00] Dak**
Such fortitude.
**[19:02] Dak**
Are you really a woman?
**[19:04] Kyu**
I'm Yagyu Kyubei!
**[19:10] Kyu**
Come!
**[19:12] Kag**
Do you have an idea to beat that monster?
**[19:15] Kyu**
If we fight him head-on at close
range, we won't stand a chance.
**[19:18] Kyu**
In that case, we must use our mobility
and rain concentrated fire upon him.
**[19:22] Tae**
Kyu-chan!
**[19:24] Kyu**
Tae-chan?
**[19:25] Kyu**
Why?
**[19:26] Tae**
How could I run away after what you said?
**[19:30] Tae**
Let's show them what women
and children can do.
**[19:41] Dak**
It matters not. Slaughter them all!
**[19:51] Dak**
Did you really think you could seal
off my range with this trickery?
**[20:00] Dak**
I saw that simultaneous attack from three
directions coming from a mile away.
**[20:05] Dak**
Die!
**[20:08] Gin**
It's not three directions.
**[20:10] Gin**
It's four!
**[20:16] Dak**
I see.
**[20:18] Dak**
But your frail swords
cannot even break my horn!
**[20:24] Gin**
Even if we can't break your horn,
**[20:26] Gin**
we can break your nose at least!
**[20:32] Tae**
Now!
**[20:41] Kad**
Playtime is over, you whelps!
**[20:45] Kad**
Get down here!
**[20:49] Kyu**
Here we are.
**[20:51] Kyu**
Playtime is only beginning!
**[20:52] Dak**
Y-You fiends...
**[21:09] Dak**
Not good enough!
**[21:23] Tsu**
There are still some women
and children over here.
**[21:27] Tsu**
But playing with the women of Yoshiwara
is a game of life and death.
**[21:31] Tsu**
You'd best be prepared.
**[21:36] Shin**
Tsukuyo-san!
**[21:51] Dak**
Is that it?
**[21:58] Dak**
Yeah, that's it.
**[22:05] Gin**
We're not gonna play anymore with a guy
who can't even be "it" in a game of tag.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Chin**
The boss of this town has returned.
***SIGN*** Bragging About Your Own Heroic Deeds
Will Make People Hate You,
so Make Others Do It For You
***SIGN*** With the Kabuki District in danger,
***SIGN*** people rush to its aid one after another!
***SIGN*** And the father-and-daughter pair
***SIGN*** who had left on a journey together will...?!
# 350 - Bragging About Your Own Heroic Deeds Will Make People Hate You, so Make Others Do It For You
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Bragging About Your Own Heroic Deeds
Will Make People Hate You,
so Make Others Do It For You
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:47] Tsu**
What? Done already?
**[01:50] Tsu**
In Yoshiwara, men are disliked if
they're either too fast or too slow.
**[01:56] G**
No way. Ougai-sama was taken out by such...
**[02:00] Gin**
C'mon. Don't tell me you're still calling
these guys mere women and children.
**[02:07] Gin**
Not all of Earth's women are
monstrous gorillas like these!
**[02:11] Gin**
We have plenty of better women—
**[02:14] Gin**
Wh-Why are you here, anyway?
**[02:19] Tsu**
You were right on the money. We're here
to ruin the reputation of Earth's women.
**[02:25] Kyu**
Never thought the likes of Tsukuyo-dono
and I would shoulder the honor of women.
**[02:30] Kag**
Don't worry about it. My loli-cuteness
can cover for it all.
**[02:34] Gin**
You're the one ruining
their reputation the most!
**[02:37] Tae**
The only people who'd gather in a
battlefield even men would run from
**[02:41] Tae**
are women, don't you think?
**[02:50] (Flashback) Hin**
Looks like it has begun.
**[02:56] (Flashback) Hin**
You want to go help them,
**[03:00] (Flashback) Hin**
don't you?
**[03:02] (Flashback) Tsu**
I'm the Courtesan of Death,
guardian of Yoshiwara.
**[03:07] (Flashback) Hin**
Tsukuyo, it's okay for you to give
off your own dazzling light now.
**[03:14] (Flashback) Sei**
Tsukuyo-nee.
**[03:17] (Flashback) Sei**
Go on.
**[03:18] (Flashback) Sei**
We'll protect Mom and Yoshiwara, I promise!
**[03:25] (Flashback) Hin**
This time,
**[03:27] (Flashback) Hin**
it's the sun's turn to keep
watch while the moon is away.
**[03:32] (Flashback) Hin**
Go illuminate their path
with the light they gave us.
**[03:42] (Flashback) Hin**
She's such a handful.
**[03:45] (Flashback) Hin**
If we don't give her a
million and one reasons,
**[03:47] (Flashback) Hin**
she won't even go see the man she fell for.
**[03:53] (Flashback) Hin**
"The world doesn't matter.
I just want to die by your side."
**[03:58] (Flashback) Hin**
Isn't that reason enough?
**[04:02] G**
Scatter! Don't bunch up in the alley!
**[04:05] Tsu**
Running away? Some men you are!
**[04:08] Kyu**
Don't you have it in you
to avenge your leader?!
**[04:14] Tsu**
Run from it as we might,
we're still women in the end, huh?
**[04:17] Kyu**
Nothing wrong with that.
**[04:19] Kyu**
I now feel,
**[04:21] Kyu**
for the first time,
**[04:23] Kyu**
that being born a girl wasn't so bad.
**[04:30] Tsu**
I see.
**[04:32] Tsu**
Wanna hit up a boutique once
this war is over, then?
**[04:36] Kyu**
Nah. I'd rather get pancakes.
**[04:43] Tsu**
K...
**[04:44] Tsu**
Kyubei!
**[04:50] Oug**
I never thought I'd run into someone
who could break my horn again.
**[04:56] Shin**
No!
**[04:58] Oug**
But...
**[04:59] Oug**
You couldn't crack my skull, huh?
**[05:04] Sot**
You're having an awfully hard
time dealing with these apes.
**[05:08] Sot**
Can't you fight using your head a little?
**[05:12] Shin**
Sis!
**[05:14] Oug**
Sotatsu...
**[05:16] Oug**
You struck while we were
engaged with the enemy?
**[05:19] Oug**
You conniving thief!
**[05:21] Sot**
Our primary goal
**[05:23] Sot**
is to restore the comms
affected by that virus cannon.
**[05:29] Sot**
Earthlings, offer up the
creator of the virus cannon.
**[05:33] Sot**
If you don't,
**[05:35] Sot**
these women are all dead.
**[05:37] Shin**
D-Don't!
**[05:38] Oto**
Here.
**[05:42] Oto**
The mastermind's right here.
**[05:46] Tae**
Otose-san! Gengai-san!
**[05:49] Oto**
This geezer here is Edo's finest
inventor, the one who sank your ships.
**[05:54] Oto**
And this gran here is the one
who organized the whole thing.
**[05:57] Gen**
I built that machine to
protect the people of Edo.
**[06:02] Gen**
If people died to keep it safe, we'd
be mistaking the means for the end.
**[06:06] Oto**
There you have it.
**[06:08] Oto**
Take us to hell or wherever.
**[06:11] Oto**
You guys did well,
**[06:14] Oto**
but this is as far as we go.
**[06:17] 73**
Hold it!
**[06:20] 73**
Why're you tryin' to hog all the glory?
**[06:24] 73**
The one who built that virus cannon
**[06:26] 73**
was me, Doctor Kurogoma Katsuo!
**[06:31] 73**
I went through so much to build that
thing! Ain't that right, assistants?
**[06:35] G**
Yes, bos—I mean, Doctor!
It must've been hell!
**[06:39] 73**
Which parts? Give 'em the details
on which parts exactly were hell!
**[06:44] G**
L-Like all the addition and
subtraction. That was hell.
**[06:47] 73**
Are you stupid? Like you could build
somethin' like that with just that!
**[06:51] 73**
We also used multiplication!
**[06:53] 73**
The sevens table was the hardest!
**[06:54] Sot**
What's going on here?
Didn't the geezer build that—
**[06:55] 73**
No matter how many times we did it, seven
times eight always came out to sixty-eight!
**[06:57] Kyo**
Machines are just like women.
**[06:59] G**
But it's sixty-four!
**[07:01] Kyo**
Unless they're handled with care,
they'll break down immediately.
**[07:01] 73**
What? Really?
**[07:05] Kyo**
No chimpanzee or crude geezer
could build that thing.
**[07:10] Kyo**
But my, Doctor Kyoshiro's, wiles make both
contraptions and women a piece of cake.
**[07:16] 73**
Yer face is the only contraption here,
you monster of plastic surgery!
**[07:20] Kyo**
If you want to take someone, take me.
**[07:23] Kyo**
But I won't be held accountable should your
planet's women become slaves to my virus.
**[07:30] 73**
Shut it! I've got a ton of viruses myself!
**[07:33] Kyo**
Yours are just STDs.
**[07:34] 73**
Who're you sayin' has crotch rot?!
**[07:35] G**
Bro! Nobody specified crotch rot!
**[07:39] [SONG] Sign**
Indeed.
**[07:39] HB**
*Indeed.*
***SIGN*** All men
**[07:41] HB**
*All men*
***SIGN*** may be doctors
with virus cannons
in their crotches.
**[07:43] HB**
* may be doctors with virus*
* cannons in their crotches.*
**[07:47] Haj**
No way that's right!
There's a limit to "forced," bro!
**[07:51] HB**
If you must take someone,
take this Doctor Hardboiled with you.
**[07:55] HB**
And let me research
crossbreeding on your planet.
**[07:59] 73**
You've got yer priorities all mixed up!
**[08:01] Kyo**
No. I shall go and represent
Earth in slaying a thousand.
**[08:04] 73**
You, too?! Fine, I'll get in on it!
**[08:06] HB**
No, I'm more than enough.
**[08:08] Sot**
Knock it off! Who's the real inventor?
**[08:11] Cat**
Me!
**[08:12] G**
Me!
**[08:17] Oto**
You all...
**[08:19] Cat**
If you want to take anyone, take all of us.
**[08:22] Cat**
The ones who built that and
tried to protect this town...
**[08:26] All**
It was all of us!
**[08:30] Sot**
So that's your answer?
**[08:34] Sot**
If anyone's going to die, you're
all prepared to die here with them?
**[08:38] Sot**
But there's no need for that.
**[08:41] Sot**
The only people who need to die
is everyone but the geezer!
**[08:56] Shin**
Sis!
**[09:02] Sot**
I never had any intention of cutting a deal
with people whose days are numbered.
**[09:07] Sot**
The only ones we deal with
are the Liberation Army.
**[09:15] Oto**
Agreed.
**[09:16] Oto**
I don't plan on cutting a deal with people
whose days are numbered, either.
**[09:21] Oto**
The ones we're dealing with
**[09:23] Oto**
are over here.
**[09:29] Oto**
Took you long enough.
**[09:31] Oto**
Buying time isn't easy, you know?
**[09:43] Tae**
Shin-chan...
**[09:47] Shin**
What's going on?
**[09:48] Chin**
Thank goodness.
**[09:51] Chin**
Looks like we made it in time.
**[09:54] Chin**
Good work keeping watch while we were away.
**[09:58] Chin**
You did well to hold out.
**[10:01] Chin**
But everything will be all right now.
**[10:12] Sot**
Who goes there?
**[10:14] Jir**
'Tis an honor.
**[10:16] Jir**
I was born and raised in
the Kabuki District of Edo.
**[10:20] Jir**
I left on a long journey of atonement,
**[10:24] Jir**
but unable to forget my hometown
or the promise I made with my friend,
**[10:28] Jir**
I have returned red-faced.
**[10:32] Jir**
I am...
**[10:36] Jir**
Terada Tatsugoro's friend and
the Kabuki District's guardian.
**[10:42] Jir**
Doromizu Jirocho's the name.
**[10:53] Chin**
Residents of the Kabuki District,
**[10:56] Chin**
the boss of this town has returned.
**[11:02] Chin**
I'm back, Bro!
**[11:05] Shin**
Pirako-san!
**[11:09] Sot**
Laughable.
**[11:11] Sot**
You were buying time while
your women were taken hostage
**[11:15] Sot**
for a broken-down old man like this?
**[11:17] Jir**
I don't know how it works on your planet,
**[11:20] Jir**
but over here, it ain't easy for
men to call themselves that.
**[11:26] Jir**
Just take a look at the women here.
**[11:29] Jir**
The planet's about to be destroyed,
but instead of running or hiding,
**[11:34] Jir**
they've all got bold looks on their faces
**[11:36] Jir**
and are standing their ground
with their heads held high.
**[11:40] Jir**
That's why the men of this town
always get ridiculed as cowards.
**[11:47] Sot**
Attack.
**[11:50] Jir**
And that's why
**[11:54] Jir**
we men howl about our chivalry
until the day we die!
**[12:02] 73**
Let's roll, cowards of Kabuki District!
**[12:06] 73**
This is our time to show off our manliness!
**[12:16] Jir**
Kid.
**[12:17] Jir**
The same trick won't work twice on samurai.
**[12:22] Jir**
We...
**[12:27] Jir**
We remember.
**[12:31] Jir**
We remember how you kill.
**[12:36] Gin**
Here I thought you'd gone senile and come
back to make another move on the gran.
**[12:42] Jir**
I did come back for a woman,
but a different one this time.
**[12:45] Gin**
Gee, what a playboy.
**[12:47] Gin**
What kinda monster is it this—
**[12:49] Chin**
Bro!
**[12:51] Jir**
Fine lass, ain't she?
**[12:51] Shin**
Pirako-san!
**[12:53] Jir**
When she heard the Liberation
Army was approaching the town,
**[12:53] Kag**
Cun Pirako!
**[12:55] Chin**
It's been too long.
**[12:56] Jir**
she insisted on coming back.
**[12:58] Chin**
What are you saying?
**[13:00] Chin**
You were walking so fast yourself,
I had a hard time keeping up.
**[13:04] Jir**
You were just too slow.
**[13:07] Chin**
You were too fast.
**[13:09] Jir**
You were too slow.
**[13:10] Chin**
You were too fast!
**[13:11] Jir**
You were too slow.
**[13:14] Chin**
But you really were too fast...
**[13:18] Jir**
Y-Yeah, I was going too fast.
I was going at Mach speed.
**[13:21] Jir**
Want some candy?
**[13:22] Shin**
Jirocho-san?!
**[13:23] Kag**
The diarrhea geezer got wrapped around his
daughter's finger while they were away.
**[13:28] Jir**
Don't be stupid! I'm the Great...
**[13:31] Chin**
Jirochon. Call him that.
**[13:32] Chin**
That's what I've been calling him lately.
**[13:34] Jir**
Don't mention that in public—
**[13:36] Chin**
He yelled at me...
**[13:37] Jir**
I'm not mad. Jirochon's
perfectly all right with it.
**[13:41] Jir**
Oh, want a steamed bun, Pirarin?
**[13:42] Shin**
You call her Pirarin?!
**[13:50] Sot**
I see. You're the ones who
killed Kada of the Harusame?
**[13:55] Sot**
I'd heard her entire group
got wiped out on Earth.
**[13:59] Sot**
Being able to avenge one of my
own here is a pleasant surprise.
**[14:03] Jir**
Stand back, Pirarin.
**[14:05] Chin**
No, Jirochon. This one is mine.
**[14:09] Chin**
I am Doromizu Pirako.
**[14:12] Chin**
I'll stake this name my brothers helped me
obtain and uphold my hometown's honor.
**[14:20] Shin**
Pirako-san...
**[14:22] Jir**
That so? I won't stop you, then.
**[14:25] Jir**
Listen up, you louts! If you
lay one finger on this girl,
**[14:32] Jir**
I'll kill you dead.
**[14:35] Gin**
Why me?!
**[14:36] Gin**
The enemy's over there! What kinda
honor are you trying to uphold?!
**[14:39] Gin**
My daughter's taken a liking to some
loser, so I'm going to kill him dead.
**[14:43] Gin**
Quit it with that pinpoint
sense of honor and justice!
**[14:45] Jir**
That said...
**[14:48] Jir**
Allow me to express my gratitude.
**[14:52] Jir**
Thank you for fighting.
**[14:55] Jir**
Thank you for protecting everything.
**[14:58] Jir**
Thank you for staying alive.
**[15:05] Jir**
* Tatsugoro, your spirit still*
* lives strong in this town.*
**[15:12] Jir**
* The Kabuki District is still*
* the same old town you loved.*
**[15:17] Jir**
*Please watch over them...*
**[15:21] Jir**
* The people who've inherited this*
* town, and the path they take.*
**[15:32] Cat**
This way, Otose-san!
**[15:37] Oto**
Sheesh.
**[15:38] Oto**
Why is the gangster grandpa
having the most fun raising hell?
**[15:45] Oto**
*Actually, that's how you've always been.*
**[15:50] Oto**
* All my memories of you involve you*
* fighting someone or another.*
**[15:55] Oto**
* You swung your fists around like*
* it was your way of saying hello.*
**[16:00] Oto**
*Yes, it was the same that time, too.*
**[16:06] (Flashback) Ttgr**
So you're Jirocho?
**[16:09] (Flashback) Ttgr**
I heard you were an honorable man who upheld
the order of this town even as yakuza,
**[16:14] (Flashback) Ttgr**
but you should discipline
your underlings better.
**[16:18] (Flashback) Oto**
You've got it wrong about these guys, sir.
**[16:21] (Flashback) Oto**
Lately, more hoodlums have started using
Jirocho's name to boss people around.
**[16:26] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Oh, is that so?
**[16:29] (Flashback) Jir**
I was thinking it was high time
I taught these punks a lesson...
**[16:36] (Flashback) Jir**
But I feel like fighting someone
on the straight and narrow today.
**[16:39] (Flashback) Jir**
Care to join me?
**[16:47] Oto**
* You punched, got punched, hit*
* each other with everything you had,*
**[16:58] Oto**
*and hurt each other.*
**[17:06] Oto**
*But while watching you, I eventually learned*
**[17:16] Oto**
* that conversing with your fists*
* came more naturally to you two.*
**[17:24] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Looks like she's gonna open up a place soon.
**[17:27] (Flashback) Jir**
Really? What kinda place will it be?
**[17:29] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Don't play dumb, Jirocho.
**[17:32] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Running a place where people could cast
aside their status and drink as fools
**[17:37] (Flashback) Ttgr**
has always been her dream.
**[17:40] (Flashback) Ttgr**
The reason she found it so easy
to find a place and raise money
**[17:45] (Flashback) Ttgr**
was because you laid the groundwork
behind the scenes, right?
**[17:48] (Flashback) Jir**
I wouldn't dare be so thoughtless.
**[17:50] (Flashback) Ttgr**
She did it all herself.
**[17:55] (Flashback) Ttgr**
I'll leave it at that, then.
**[17:59] (Flashback) Ttgr**
But things will get harder from now on.
**[18:05] (Flashback) Ttgr**
You know this town ain't easy to live
in without anyone supporting you.
**[18:10] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Say, Jirocho.
**[18:12] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Don't you think it's about
time you told her...
**[18:20] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Where'd that come from?
Was there a fly on my face?
**[18:23] (Flashback) Jir**
Are you trying to let another guy have the
woman you fell for? A gangster, no less?
**[18:31] (Flashback) Ttgr**
I said it 'cause I figured you were a
man who'd quit for the woman he loves.
**[18:37] (Flashback) Jir**
We're just old friends who
can't get rid of each other.
**[18:40] (Flashback) Ttgr**
And a lot of married couples tend to be that.
**[18:44] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Besides, living life alone and
as I please suits me more.
**[18:49] (Flashback) Ttgr**
On the other hand, you're
used to having a family.
**[18:53] (Flashback) Ttgr**
Aren't you, godfather?
**[18:56] (Flashback) Jir**
Looks like we both know that we're
cowards who can't make a woman happy.
**[19:03] (Flashback) Jir**
But we both believe the coward in front of
us is the only one who can be her support.
**[19:10] (Flashback) Jir**
Only one way to settle this!
**[19:12] (Flashback) Ttgr**
With our fists!
**[19:17] (Flashback) Jir**
If I win, you'll woo her, Tatsugoro!
**[19:24] (Flashback) Ttgr**
We're both trying to pass her off? There
won't be any wooing if she finds out.
**[19:32] (Flashback) Ttgr**
But...
**[19:34] (Flashback) Ttgr**
I can't wait to see you try and woo her!
**[19:39] (Flashback) Jir**
You think you've already won?
**[19:40] (Flashback) Ttgr**
The battle was decided the day we met!
**[19:43] (Flashback) Jir**
How many years ago do you think that was?!
**[19:47] (Flashback) Jir**
*I can't afford to lose to you.*
**[19:50] (Flashback) Jir**
*Because I noticed.*
**[19:53] (Flashback) Jir**
*I've been right by her side
and watching her forever,*
**[19:58] (Flashback) Jir**
*so I couldn't help but realize.*
**[20:28] (Flashback) Jir**
Once you open up shop,
can I come get a drink?
**[20:33] (Flashback) Jir**
If it's a place where both gangsters
and cops can drink as fools,
**[20:40] (Flashback) Jir**
it'll welcome even the guy who beat
up the man the owner loves, right?
**[20:49] (Flashback) Oto**
Of course.
**[20:53] (Flashback) Oto**
After all, you're the biggest fool in Japan.
**[21:16] Gin**
Run for it!
**[21:20] Sot**
Futile.
**[21:24] Sot**
This area's already under our control.
**[21:26] Sot**
You're rats who jumped
into a trap on your own.
**[22:01] 73**
Now, old man!
**[22:04] 73**
Show 'em what the boss of
the Kabuki District can do!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:44] Gin**
Keep running forward until you
can't see any enemies up ahead!
**[23:47] Jir**
I've gotten in on quite the gamble.
**[23:49] Hed**
Just your friendly neighborhood florist.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Jump and Power Creep
Go Hand-in-Hand
***SIGN*** The back-and-forth battle of the Kabuki District
***SIGN*** reaches its closing stages!
***SIGN*** All kinds of people
***SIGN*** show up again!
# 351 - Jump and Power Creep Go Hand-in-Hand
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:19] (Flashback) Oug**
W-Wait...
**[00:23] (Flashback) Oug**
After breaking the code
and abandoning your crew,
**[00:25] (Flashback) Oug**
where are you going to
live out your life now?
**[00:30] (Flashback) Oug**
You're the Dakini's greatest warrior,
the one hailed as the "Divine Horn."
**[00:36] (Flashback) Oug**
Are you really going to leave
the battlefield forever?
**[00:40] (Flashback) Hed**
I'd give away these horns if I could.
**[00:45] (Flashback) Hed**
How many planets do you think
we've turned into wastelands?
**[00:49] (Flashback) Hed**
How many lives blooming on those planets
have we plucked right out of the ground?
**[00:54] (Flashback) Hed**
Just as we Dakini were born to fight,
**[00:59] (Flashback) Hed**
the lives we plucked out must've been trying
to bloom for a purpose of their own.
**[01:07] (Flashback) Hed**
I now want to see how they live, and what
kind of flowers they will make bloom.
**[01:15] (Flashback) Oug**
I hear you were being treated for a
parasite you contracted on Planet Kohaku.
**[01:22] (Flashback) Oug**
They said it was a parasitic plant
that takes root in its host's brain,
**[01:26] (Flashback) Oug**
and that you changed completely
as a person ever since.
**[01:30] (Flashback) Hed**
I didn't change.
**[01:32] (Flashback) Hed**
I bloomed.
**[01:35] (Flashback) Hed**
I grew a flower of my own.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Jump and Power Creep
Go Hand-in-Hand
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[03:43] 73**
Your friends are takin' a nap outside.
**[03:48] 73**
You should be careful.
This town is a bit dangerous.
**[03:53] 73**
If you're caught sleepin', you'll
have everythin' stolen in a flash!
**[03:58] Sot**
You fiends!
**[04:28] Sot**
We operate under the policy of one for all.
**[04:31] Sot**
We would gladly lay down our
lives for the greater good.
**[04:35] Sot**
That's the way of the Shinra.
**[04:43] Jir**
I told you...
**[04:45] Jir**
We remember how you people kill.
**[04:56] Gin**
You're not alone?
**[04:58] Jir**
Well, neither are we.
**[05:03] Jir**
I guess fighting as a group
isn't so bad once in a while.
**[05:07] Gin**
I dunno. I was this close to skewering
the annoying ganguro geezer, too.
**[05:16] Jir**
Well, too bad about that.
**[05:23] G**
Sotatsu-sama!
**[05:25] 73**
See that?
**[05:26] 73**
This is the power of the
universe's greatest gangsters,
**[05:28] 73**
the Sewer Rats led by Jirocho!
**[05:32] 73**
And I'm the Sewer Rats' right-hand man,
**[05:35] 73**
the greatest seven-three part in
the universe, Kurogoma Katsu—
**[05:38] Kag**
The universe's greatest gangsters, my ass!
**[05:40] Kag**
Our young'uns were the ones who
took down the enemy's boss!
**[05:44] Kag**
We're the universe's greatest
gangsters, the Odd Jobs Family!
**[05:47] Shin**
When did we become gangsters?!
**[05:49] Chin**
Besides, you ain't the right hand
man of the Sewer Rats, Kacchan.
**[05:53] Chin**
Jirochon said he'd leave the
family's future in my hands.
**[05:56] 73**
What?!
**[05:57] 73**
Why haven't I heard of this?
What's this about, Jirochon?!
**[06:01] Jir**
Who're you calling Jirochon?
**[06:02] 73**
Do you have any idea how much I did to
keep the gang going while you were gone?
**[06:06] 73**
Ever since that time, I've
always thought of you as...
**[06:11] 73**
Yes. Back then, I was as sharp as a knife,
hurting anyone who dared touch me.
**[06:17] (Flashback) Jir**
Whoops. Sorry about that.
**[06:20] (Flashback) 73**
Hey, hold it right there!
**[06:22] (Flashback) 73**
You bump into someone and
that's all you got to say?
**[06:30] (Flashback) 73**
Wh-Who are you?
**[06:33] (Flashback) Jir**
Kid, snapping at everyone around you in
a youthful frenzy is all well and good,
**[06:38] (Flashback) Jir**
but let me say just one thing...
**[06:42] (Flashback) Jir**
Do we really need a flashback for you?
**[06:45] (Flashback) 73**
*He rejected my flashback
within the flashback!*
**[06:48] Jir**
I think it went something like that.
**[06:50] 73**
Could you not alter my flashback, old man?!
**[06:53] 73**
You can't do this after multiple
flashbacks about your youth!
**[06:57] 73**
Anyway, I fell for you back then
and followed you all this while!
**[07:01] 73**
And you're tellin' me to quit right
after I got the gang back on its feet?!
**[07:04] Jir**
I don't remember ever saying
that in the first place.
**[07:08] Jir**
What kind of father would want
his daughter to be a gangster?
**[07:11] Chin**
What? But you said, "I'm sure you
could handle being the young leader."
**[07:14] Jir**
It was a hypothetical statement. I didn't
tell you to actually take that spot.
**[07:17] Chin**
You did, too.
**[07:19] Jir**
No, I didn't.
**[07:19] Chin**
You did, too!
**[07:20] Jir**
No, I didn't.
**[07:22] Chin**
But you really did say it...
**[07:25] Jir**
Pirako, I can't back down on this.
**[07:28] Jir**
If I let you take such halfway measures,
**[07:30] Jir**
I'd never hear the end of it from
your mother, who left you in my care.
**[07:34] Jir**
If you're gonna do it, take
the throne, Boss Pirarin.
**[07:37] Jir**
Jirochon will be yakuza
association chairman.
**[07:39] Chin**
Hooray!
**[07:40] 73**
That's what you meant by halfway?!
**[07:42] Jir**
Aren't you glad, Katsuo?
**[07:43] Jir**
Now you'll forever be the right-hand
man—halfway to the top.
**[07:46] 73**
I never said I wanted to be the
right-hand man of the Pirarin Family!
**[07:49] 73**
There's a limit to bein' a doting father!
**[07:51] 73**
Young Miss, when will the Jirocho
we know and love return to us?
**[07:54] Chin**
Not Young Miss, Kacchan.
That's "Boss" to you.
**[07:58] Chin**
What will I do with you?
**[07:59] Chin**
I'll let you off with five
chopped fingers this time.
**[08:01] Chin**
It'll be ten each from next time.
**[08:03] 73**
How many fingers do you think I have?!
**[08:05] Gin**
Good grief. I really should've skewered him.
**[08:09] Gin**
If this keeps up, even if we
chase off the Liberation Army,
**[08:12] Gin**
this town still won't ever be peaceful.
**[08:16] Jir**
Do you think this town
will calm down once I die?
**[08:20] Jir**
You'll still be here after I'm gone.
**[08:23] Jir**
And those guys will still
be here after you're gone.
**[08:28] Jir**
Those brash kids who only feel
**[08:32] Jir**
truly alive within the hustle and bustle.
**[08:38] (Flashback) Jir**
Tatsugoro...
**[08:41] (Flashback) Jir**
This ain't your place to die.
**[08:46] (Flashback) Jir**
Let's go back together, Tatsugoro,
**[08:49] (Flashback) Jir**
to our town.
**[08:53] (Flashback) Tsgr**
But if we walk this slowly, she'll
become a gran by the time we get back.
**[08:59] (Flashback) Tsgr**
But I guess that ain't too bad.
**[09:03] (Flashback) Tsgr**
That's the one thing I want
to see most right now.
**[09:12] (Flashback) Tsgr**
Jirocho...
**[09:14] (Flashback) Tsgr**
What kind of town do you
think our home will become?
**[09:21] (Flashback) Tsgr**
What kind of geezers and
grans will you become,
**[09:25] (Flashback) Tsgr**
and what kind of youngsters
will gather there?
**[09:32] (Flashback) Jir**
Knowing us, we'll be stubborn geezers
lecturing youngsters who can't stand us.
**[09:41] (Flashback) Tsgr**
That sounds amazing.
**[09:44] (Flashback) Tsgr**
I want to hurry up and lecture some kids.
**[09:48] (Flashback) Jir**
Yeah, I can't wait, either.
**[10:32] Oug**
*The first was that man.*
**[10:35] Oug**
* And I used my broken horn as*
* motivation to grow much stronger.*
**[10:41] Oug**
*So why have I had a horn broken once again?*
**[10:49] Oug**
*Why are we once again...*
**[11:01] Oug**
*running in fear from these apes like so?*
**[11:09] Oug**
*And it isn't just us.*
**[11:14] Oug**
The head?!
**[11:19] Oug**
Retreat!
**[11:22] Tsu**
Don't let them escape!
**[11:25] Oug**
*What are these people?*
**[11:29] Oug**
* How are they driving back proud*
* warrior races one after the other?*
**[11:34] (Flashback) Hed**
The lives we plucked out must've been trying
to bloom for a purpose of their own.
**[11:43] Oug**
* What were they born for,*
* and what are they living for?*
**[11:47] Oug**
* What is the name of the flower*
* these Earthlings are growing?*
**[11:52] Jir**
They're finally falling apart.
**[11:55] Jir**
But unless we do something
about their main force,
**[11:59] Jir**
we'll still be in a desperate situation.
**[12:02] Jir**
If they regroup with the main
force, that's it for us.
**[12:05] Jir**
What we did would amount to nothing more
than sticking a needle into an elephant.
**[12:09] Gin**
Sure, one needle isn't enough
to defeat an elephant.
**[12:12] Gin**
But if it were tipped with poison,
it'd soon spread throughout that huge body
**[12:17] Gin**
and render the elephant immobile.
**[12:19] Gin**
Fear is contagious, you know?
***SIGN*** Kabuki District First
**[12:23] Gin**
If they wanna get out of this town, let them.
**[12:27] Gin**
But...
**[12:33] Gin**
Only after we've laced them
with the poison known as fear!
**[12:38] Sai**
Pako?
**[12:39] Gin**
Our visitors will be leaving, Mama.
**[12:43] Gin**
They had their fair share of fun in our town.
**[12:47] Gin**
Right down to their butt hair, we'll...
**[12:48] Kag**
...fleece them for everything they've got!
**[12:55] G**
N-No way!
**[12:57] G**
The last mercenary group came back
with their tails between their legs!
**[12:59] G**
It's not just here!
**[13:01] G**
Even at the West Gate...
**[13:04] G**
and the South Gate!
**[13:07] Jir**
I've gotten in on quite the gamble.
**[13:10] Jir**
Opening all the gates to
drive out the enemies inside
**[13:14] Jir**
and using that momentum to make the
main Liberation Army force withdraw?
**[13:18] Jir**
But who knows if we'll be able to make
that huge force sense impending defeat?
**[13:24] Jir**
I'm a gangster, and even I wouldn't
make such a reckless gamble.
**[13:28] Bim**
But maybe the only one capable of doing
something as absurd as saving the world
**[13:32] Bim**
is a huge moron who could doom the
world to destruction with one misstep.
**[13:40] Gin**
Run!
**[13:42] Gin**
Keep running forward until you
can't see any enemies up ahead!
**[13:45] Gin**
Squeeze out every last
ounce of energy you have!
**[13:48] Gin**
Burn everything you have,
and leave nothing behind!
**[13:50] Gin**
Keep running until you're running on empty!
**[13:56] Oug**
Your enemy is that way.
**[14:00] Oug**
If you still want to withdraw,
then I'll take you on.
**[14:07] Oug**
Fight, you small fry!
**[14:15] Shin**
* With one roar, he revived*
* their fighting spirit!*
**[14:19] Shin**
* Their fear of us was overwritten*
* by an even greater fear!*
**[14:25] Oug**
* I am a Dakini. One who was born to*
* fight, and one who lives to fight.*
**[14:31] Oug**
*There is nothing I fear.*
**[14:33] Oug**
* If there were something, I would simply*
* pluck it out with my own hands.*
**[14:42] Oug**
Hey, you. Didn't you hear me?
**[14:49] Oug**
Anyone who flees here has to answer to me.
**[14:52] Hed**
I'm terribly sorry.
**[14:54] Hed**
I heard a war was about to break out,
so I was helping everyone evacuate.
**[14:58] Hed**
That's why I couldn't get here in time.
**[15:01] Hed**
If only I'd planted you elsewhere sooner...
**[15:06] Hed**
I'm so sorry!
**[15:10] Oug**
Th-That flower... It can't be!
**[15:14] Oug**
The parasite, Parappa Heaven!
**[15:17] Oug**
It takes root in its host's head,
gradually takes over his thoughts,
**[15:21] Oug**
and eventually turns their mind into
an empty, blissful bed of flowers...
**[15:25] Oug**
A deadly parasitic plant from Planet Kohaku!
**[15:29] (Flashback) Hed**
I bloomed.
**[15:32] (Flashback) Hed**
I grew a flower of my own.
**[15:37] Oug**
Are you...
**[15:38] Oug**
The Dakini's greatest warrior,
the one who broke my horn...
**[15:42] Oug**
The one hailed as the "Divine Horn"...
**[15:44] Hed**
I have no idea who you are.
**[15:49] Hed**
I'm just a friendly neighborhood florist.
**[15:53] Hed**
I love the flowers, the lives,
that bloom on this planet,
**[15:56] Hed**
and to Odd Jobs, I'm...
**[16:00] Hed**
Neighbor Hedoro!
**[16:03] Hed**
And so, I ask.
**[16:05] Hed**
Who was it that trampled upon
one of this planet's lives?
**[16:09] Hed**
Please be honest and raise your hand!
**[16:12] Shin**
H-Hedoro-san...
**[16:15] Oug**
Get him!
**[16:17] Oug**
All hands, defeat this man!
**[16:19] Oug**
Break the Divine Horn!
**[16:24] Hed**
This won't do.
**[16:26] Hed**
I did ask you to be honest
and raise your hand,
**[16:29] Hed**
but I wasn't expecting
so many of you to do it.
**[16:33] Hed**
I wanted the culprit to apologize to
the flower, but this will take all day.
**[16:39] Oug**
Corrupted by the flower, you've lost your
character and all your fighting skill.
**[16:44] Oug**
You don't need those horns anymore!
**[16:52] Hed**
But...
**[16:55] Hed**
Even if making you all apologize
is out of the question,
**[16:58] Hed**
I think I can manage punishing
each of you with a punch.
**[17:05] Hed**
Now...
**[17:09] Hed**
I'd like to get this over with quick,
so could you all come to me at once?
**[17:18] Shin**
H-Hedoro!
**[17:21] Shin**
He took out that monster in one hit!
**[17:23] Shin**
He threw the Liberation Army
into the deepest depths of fear!
**[17:26] Shin**
The enemy's been consumed by fear
and is retreating all at once!
**[17:29] Shin**
Hedoro-san, you're too scary! You really
are the scariest one of them all!
**[17:39] Shin**
Gin-san! Now's our chance to gang up on them!
**[17:42] Shin**
Even these guys are running away!
**[17:44] Shin**
Why are you all being consumed by fear, too?!
**[17:46] Gin**
Are you stupid?
**[17:47] Gin**
If that monster's flower withers, that'll
mean the advent of a new demon king!
**[17:50] Gin**
This final arc was nothing but the prologue
for Jump's trademark power-creep system!
**[17:55] Gin**
I've had it with this! I'm making
the jump to Shonen Sunday!
**[17:57] Shin**
What are you even talking about?!
**[18:03] Gedo**
No need to worry, Gintoki-sama.
**[18:06] Gedo**
No matter what manner of demons
or evil monsters show up,
**[18:09] Gedo**
Edo has the Ketsuno Clan
of onmyoji on its side.
**[18:16] Kag**
Gedomaru! Ketsuno Ana!
**[18:18] Shin**
Wh-Why are you here?
**[18:20] Ket**
The Ketsuno Clan was entrusted by
the bakufu with the guarding of Edo.
**[18:25] Ket**
Did you think we only take
on demons or spirits?
**[18:30] Ket**
Tell them, Gedomaru-san.
**[18:32] Ged**
I'm late 'cause Satan stubbornly started
the Third Underworld War with Nurarihyon,
**[18:40] Ged**
but I'm now prepared to switch
from occult to sci-fi.
**[18:43] Shin**
Uh, that other thing sounds much more scary!
**[18:45] Ged**
From here on, I won't be a
shikigami of the Ketsuno Clan.
**[18:50] Ged**
I'm ready to fight together
with you all as a human friend.
**[18:54] Ged**
So Gintoki-sama, please wipe that
pathetic look off your face.
**[18:59] Ged**
If you still want to withdraw,
**[19:06] Ged**
then I'll send you to the same hell I
sent Satan to. Is that okay with you?
**[19:10] Shin**
The bad guy just played
that same card earlier!
**[19:12] Ged**
Fight, you small fry!
**[19:15] Shin**
I can't tell which ones
are the shikigami here!
**[19:19] G**
Wh-What the hell is that?
**[19:20] G**
They're coming this way!
**[19:26] G**
Run for it!
**[19:29] Shin**
Wait a damn second!
**[19:30] Shin**
Instead of making the enemy retreat, we're
retreating faster than the enemy here!
**[19:34] Kag**
We overtook the enemy!
We left them in the dust!
**[19:37] Gin**
Hey, this is bad! We're gonna
catch up to the monster up ahead!
**[19:40] Shin**
We're sandwiched between monsters!
**[19:42] Shin**
What kinda sandwich is this?
Which earl came up with this thing?!
**[19:46] Gin**
Crap! There's nowhere left to run!
**[19:49] Ged**
Get going already.
**[19:59] Sei**
An illusion technique?
**[20:01] Sei**
To make an army that large retreat, we
can't fight with only what we have on hand.
**[20:07] Dou**
You must make your empty hand
look like it's full of cards
**[20:10] Dou**
and borrow the strength of the nonexistent.
**[20:13] Dou**
Only con men or we onmyoji
could pull that off.
**[20:18] Sei**
Indeed.
**[20:20] Sei**
Con man, I don't intend to
recognize you as an onmyoji.
**[20:24] Dou**
But I will recognize you as
this country's best con man.
**[20:28] Dou**
Even a con man's ability can come
in handy at a time like this.
**[20:33] Sei**
Doman!
**[20:34] Dou**
Seimei!
**[20:36] Bo**
Throw in everything you've got!
**[20:48] G**
Hold your ground!
**[20:50] G**
If we retreat any farther,
the entire force will collapse!
**[20:53] G**
We have an overwhelming numbers advantage!
**[20:55] G**
Surround the enemy and crush them!
**[20:58] G**
Reinforcements will arrive
soon! Hold out until then!
**[21:02] G**
Is it reinforcements?
**[21:06] G**
N-No way...
**[21:09] G**
There's no way they still have
so many troops remaining...
**[21:12] G**
Hey, look!
**[21:18] G**
They keep showing up from everywhere!
**[21:20] G**
I-In crazy numbers!
**[21:22] G**
Is this it? Are we surrounded?!
**[21:25] G**
Calm down! That can't be!
**[21:27] G**
How are we supposed to calm down?
**[21:29] G**
D-Does that mean we're... we're...
**[21:34] G**
Hey, wait!
**[21:35] G**
I said wait!
**[21:50] Shin**
We did it.
**[21:52] Shin**
The Liberation Army...
**[21:55] Shin**
...retreated!
**[21:57] Kag**
Gin-chan, we did it!
**[22:00] Kag**
W-With this, a little peace will
return to the Kabuki District.
**[22:06] Kag**
Gin-chan?
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:45] Kag**
Nothing beats peace after all.
**[23:48] Jir**
This town is noisy all year round.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:50] Jir**
Nights like these ain't
so bad once in a while.
***SIGN*** Peace and Destruction
Are Two Sides of the Same Coin
***SIGN*** The battle ends, the sun sets,
***SIGN*** and we jump out of the frying pan into the fire.
***SIGN*** Now that the flower's been ripped out,
***SIGN*** what's going to happen?
# 352 - Peace and Destruction Are Two Sides of the Same Coin
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul Arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[00:17] Shin**
The Liberation Army...
**[00:21] Shin**
...retreated!
**[00:30] Kag**
We win!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[01:56] Hed**
Odd Jobs...
**[01:58] Hed**
What are you doing there?
I was worried sick, you know.
**[02:03] Hed**
I couldn't believe what happened to Edo.
**[02:05] Hed**
But I believed, because you all...
**[02:09] Hed**
...will be massacred by my hand!
**[02:13] Hed**
You're about to experience true fear now.
**[02:16] Hed**
Let me tell you about my terrifying plan.
**[02:20] Hed**
It involves...
**[02:22] Hed**
not just flowers or plants.
**[02:24] Hed**
I want to watch over the flower called
mankind that I found on this planet, too.
**[02:29] Hed**
Basically, this planet was a flower
bed built to be trampled by me.
**[02:35] Hed**
I want to bloom with you all as
one of this planet's flowers.
**[02:41] Gin**
*M-My hand's stuck!*
**[02:44] Hed**
And when the flowers reach full bloom,
this planet will be a garden of peace—
**[02:50] Hed**
D-Did you break that seal?!
**[02:54] Hed**
It's all over! You humans
are done for, and so am I!
**[02:58] Hed**
And so is this universe!
**[03:00] Hed**
It's all ove—
***SIGN*** New Half Pub 1/2
Grand Opening
Chris Matsunosuke
**[03:09] Hed**
That was close.
**[03:11] Hed**
I'll be sure to repay this favor, humanity!
**[03:14] Hed**
Not on my watch.
**[03:16] Hed**
As long as I'm here, I won't let
you do as you please, Hedora!
**[03:19] Hed**
It's futile, Hedoro.
**[03:21] Hed**
This body and this universe will be
enveloped in total darkness soon!
**[03:24] Gin**
H-He split into halves?
**[03:26] Hed**
I'll protect both Earth and humanity.
**[03:28] Hed**
I'll destroy both Earth and humanity.
**[03:31] Hed**
I won't let you do as you please, Hedora!
**[03:32] Shin**
What is even going on there?
**[03:34] Kag**
I don't get it either,
**[03:34] Hed**
It's futile, Hedoro.
**[03:36] Kag**
but they look like they're having fun.
**[03:38] Kag**
It's been a while since I've seen that
kind of look on these people's faces.
**[03:43] Kag**
I guess nothing beats peace after all.
**[03:46] Shin**
Yeah, you're right.
**[03:52] Y**
Now, it's our time to shine.
***SIGN*** The joy is short-lived.
***SIGN*** The Yato move out at twilight.
***SIGN*** Even if it's for just one night,
***SIGN*** enjoy the peace while it lasts.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Peace and Destruction
Are Two Sides of the Same Coin
**[04:12] Oto**
Never thought I'd see the
day when the Kabuki District
**[04:15] Oto**
would be lit up not by neon lights,
but by moonlight and bonfires.
**[04:19] Jir**
This town is noisy all year round. Nights
like these ain't so bad once in a while.
**[04:25] Jir**
If we can see the town bathed in the
light of dawn next, it'll be perfect.
**[04:31] Jir**
We did force them to retreat,
but it ain't like we won.
**[04:35] Jir**
If the enemy force regroups and attacks
again, we'll be defeated in a flash.
**[04:40] Oto**
I didn't think I'd ever hear
such meek words from you.
**[04:45] Oto**
Living a long life has its benefits.
**[04:46] Jir**
Did that sound meek to you?
**[04:48] Jir**
I guess you've grown hard of hearing.
**[04:51] Oto**
It's not such a bad thing.
**[04:54] Oto**
The only ones who can complain and whine
are those who have people they can rely on.
**[05:00] Oto**
You've finally grown up, Jirocho.
**[05:03] Jir**
Pah! I'd much rather be called
a senile geezer than that!
**[05:08] Sai**
What's this? You two used to
constantly be at odds,
**[05:12] Sai**
but you seem to be enjoying
each other's company tonight.
**[05:18] Sai**
Oh, am I interrupting?
**[05:20] Oto**
Not at all, Saigo. I was just thinking
I'd like to share a drink with you, too.
**[05:28] Oto**
I'm actually a bit thankful we're
in this situation, you know.
**[05:32] Oto**
I feel like it has helped me
like people a little more.
**[05:38] Oto**
If it's a night like this, maybe it wouldn't
be so bad if it turned out to be my last.
**[05:56] Jir**
Nah. We haven't drank enough yet.
**[06:00] Kag**
Everyone's so beat-up.
**[06:03] Shin**
That's no surprise.
**[06:05] Shin**
It's a miracle that we even
drove that huge army back.
**[06:10] Shin**
It's not just the people
of the Kabuki District.
**[06:12] Shin**
Everyone in Edo did everything they could,
**[06:15] Shin**
as best they could.
**[06:17] Shin**
That's probably why this miracle came about.
**[06:21] Shin**
All you've been doing is getting in the way!
**[06:23] Ged**
Pandemoniums are snacks that help
with injuries and illnesses.
**[06:28] Ged**
Would you like one?
**[06:29] Shin**
Seriously, who would eat
something so grotesque?!
**[06:32] Pan**
Sorry. Am I being a nuisance after all?
**[06:35] Pan**
I was so worried, I ended up coming along.
**[06:38] Pan**
I guess I've become a
really troublesome woman.
**[06:40] Pan**
Sorry. I'll go away now.
**[06:43] Shin**
Yeah, you're a nuisance.
**[06:44] Shin**
If you're going to disturb my heart
any further, just be with me forever!
**[06:48] Kag**
You're the biggest nuisance here.
**[06:49] Tae**
Shin-chan, Kagura-chan.
**[06:51] Tae**
Forget about the straight man
routine and get some rest.
**[06:54] Kag**
Boss lady.
**[06:55] Tae**
Gedomaru-san and friends volunteered for
various tasks so that we could all rest.
**[07:02] Tae**
They said they're not that tired yet,
**[07:04] Tae**
and that they want more screen time since
they only showed up in the latter stages.
**[07:07] Shin**
Don't leak out your real motive at the end!
**[07:09] Tae**
Gedomaru-san and gang are tending
to the wounded and serving food.
**[07:12] Shin**
They're going to turn us into food!
**[07:14] Tae**
Seimei-san and Doman-san are guarding
and keeping watch on the town.
**[07:17] Sei**
My watchmen are scarier!
**[07:19] Dom**
What? My watchmen are scarier!
**[07:21] Shin**
These watchmen need watchmen of their own!
**[07:23] Tae**
Ketsuno Ana is providing assistance
via prayers and exorcism.
**[07:26] Ket**
Tomorrow's weather will be nice and clear.
**[07:28] Ket**
The perfect day for war.
**[07:29] Shin**
Don't try to start a war!
**[07:31] Tae**
If this is the time for everyone
to do what they're supposed to,
**[07:35] Tae**
then what you guys must do right now is rest.
**[07:39] Tae**
Forget about everything and get some sleep.
**[07:41] G**
B-But I'm worried the enemy
might return at any time.
**[07:45] Tae**
Relax. We're here for you,
so eat lots and sleep well.
**[07:49] Shin**
Sis, they're not sleeping!
You finished them off!
**[07:52] Ged**
Let's put them to sleep with that and
then stuff Pandemoniums in their mouths.
**[07:58] Tae**
That sounds good, too.
**[07:59] Shin**
Hey! Why are these hazards to
humanity feeding everyone?!
**[08:02] Shin**
Can anybody bring food
that's actually edible?!
**[08:05] Pan**
You finally spilled the beans.
**[08:07] Pan**
In truth, I knew all along
how you felt about me.
**[08:11] Pan**
So I'll confess, too.
**[08:14] Pan**
I really wanted you to eat me.
**[08:17] Pan**
Bye-bye. I love you.
**[08:19] Shin**
Bring me every single Pandemonium
you've got, right this instant!
**[08:23] Kag**
Shinpachi, you seriously
need to get some rest.
**[08:26] Kon**
Really? I'll take you up on
that offer and rest, then.
**[08:31] Kon**
I'm worn out from all the fighting.
**[08:35] Kon**
I finally made it back...
**[08:38] Kon**
Back to you.
**[08:40] Kon**
I'm back, Otae-san.
**[08:45] Tae**
W-Welcome back, Kondo-san.
**[08:49] Kon**
Otae-san!
**[08:51] Tae**
Kondo-san!
**[08:52] Tae**
Who're you calling Otae?!
**[08:55] Kon**
O-Otae-san? Y-You're being too intense!
**[08:58] Kon**
N-No! We can't do this!
**[09:00] Shin**
Let go of Pandemonium-san!
**[09:02] Tae**
What's with that scene right out of hell?
**[09:04] Ged**
It seems the Pandemonium's illusion
ability worked a bit too well on them.
**[09:07] Hij**
What's all this?
**[09:09] Hij**
He was saying he had a real chance,
with the world about to end and all,
**[09:13] Hij**
but all of this is no different
than it has always been.
**[09:16] Oki**
What are you saying, Hijikata-san?
**[09:19] Oki**
This is what Kondo-san wanted.
**[09:23] Oki**
The same old routine.
**[09:27] Tae**
Just when the world is about to end,
you finally return home?
**[09:30] Tae**
I see that cops will always be cops.
**[09:33] Hij**
Unfortunately, saving the world isn't
in the police's job description.
**[09:36] Hij**
But we have tons of other work to do.
**[09:38] Sac**
Pretty much.
**[09:40] Sac**
Don't know or care about the world,
**[09:43] Sac**
but it looks like we did
at least protect our home.
**[09:48] Tae**
Guys...
**[09:51] Tae**
You did well.
**[09:53] Kag**
Boss lady, you're talking to the wrong thing.
**[09:58] Oto**
So basically,
**[09:59] Oto**
the Liberation Army won't be
back for revenge immediately?
***SIGN*** Kabuki District
Four Devas
**[10:03] Oto**
You mean we'll be safe for a while?
**[10:06] Kon**
They're isolated from
their main force in space.
**[10:09] Kon**
They've lost both their comms
and their chain of command.
**[10:12] Kon**
In this situation, it'll be difficult to
regroup a force that already crumbled once.
***SIGN*** Shinsengumi
**[10:16] Hij**
They were attacked by the bakufu army while
on the run, and now they're scattered.
**[10:20] Hij**
They don't have it in them
to switch to attack.
**[10:22] Oki**
If anything, this might
be our chance to attack.
**[10:26] Oki**
If we can rob them of their provisions,
**[10:28] Oki**
we can watch the enemy crumble
without having to fight.
**[10:31] Zen**
You want us to make the first move?
***SIGN*** Oniwaban
**[10:33] Zen**
If we corner that huge force any more,
who knows how they'll respond?
**[10:39] Zen**
Besides...
**[10:40] Zen**
Those unconfirmed reports about another mercenary squad worry me, too.
**[10:44] Bim**
This victory was practically a miracle,
***SIGN*** Yagyuu Chinkage
School
**[10:48] Bim**
and we had to pay a heavy price for it.
**[10:51] Bim**
If we want more, we'll have to be
prepared to sacrifice a lot more, too.
**[10:59] Tsu**
We didn't fight to win the war.
**[11:02] Tsu**
We fought to stop it.
***SIGN*** Yoshiwara Defense
Force Hyakka
**[11:04] Tsu**
If we willingly cause more casualties,
**[11:07] Tsu**
wouldn't it be the same as siding
with the Liberation Army?
**[11:10] Sei**
Seizing an opportunity is akin to
grasping a log floating down a river.
***SIGN*** Onmyoji
Ketsuno Clan & Shirino Clan
**[11:15] Sei**
Being cautious is all well and good,
**[11:17] Sei**
but this might be our last shot at victory.
**[11:22] Ket**
Brother, are you saying we must fight?
**[11:25] Sei**
I'm saying that stopping a war needs
more resolve than starting one.
**[11:29] Kon**
Exactly. Let's fight.
**[11:31] Tsu**
But you know...
**[11:35] Ged**
How do you feel, Odd Jobs?
**[11:37] Ged**
Which option do you think we should choose?
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs
**[11:40] Kag**
I say go with curry.
**[11:42] Shin**
Nobody's asking about dinner, Kagura-chan.
**[11:46] Shin**
Well, uh...
**[11:47] Shin**
I don't understand the complicated stuff,
**[11:50] Shin**
but I feel like if we're all together,
we can work something out either way.
**[11:54] Shin**
I'm not afraid of anything.
**[11:57] Shin**
I'm just so overwhelmed that all
of you are fighting alongside us.
**[12:02] Shin**
I'm glad I was born in Edo, on Earth...
**[12:06] Shin**
Oh, that's not what you
were asking about, was it?
**[12:09] Shin**
Sorry.
**[12:11] Gin**
That's not true.
**[12:13] Gin**
Compared to the fact that so many people
have come together for one cause,
**[12:18] Gin**
which method we choose
is but a trivial matter.
**[12:22] Gin**
Then we could just
**[12:26] Gin**
try launching HEVA.
***SIGN*** All-Purpose Demonoid Final Battle Weapon
***SIGN*** Hevandorogon
**[12:41] Gin**
What do you think, everyone?
**[12:43] Gin**
We're ready.
**[12:45] Gin**
We squeezed out a high synchro
rate and are good to go whenever,
**[12:49] Gin**
but we'd like Odd Jobs' opinion.
**[12:51] Shin**
You're Odd Jobs, too.
**[12:53] Gin**
Should we launch HEVA,
or should it be on standby?
**[12:58] Gin**
How do you feel about HEVA? Do you like it?
**[13:00] Shin**
Why have our options been
whittled down to HEVA alone?
**[13:03] Gin**
What do you think, HEVA?
**[13:05] Gin**
Hey, HEVA.
**[13:07] Gin**
Um, Hedoro-san?
**[13:08] Hed**
Who, me? Uh, I think it could work.
**[13:12] Shin**
Um, it looks like even he
doesn't know about HEVA.
**[13:16] Hij**
I think it's too early.
What about you, Kondo-san?
**[13:19] Kon**
Well, yeah. I agree with you.
**[13:22] Sac**
If he wants to go, just let him.
**[13:26] Tsu**
Yes, I agree.
**[13:28] Hij**
We'll leave it to you young'uns.
**[13:31] Oto**
Do as you please, EVA.
**[13:33] G**
Wasn't it HEVA, not EVA?
**[13:35] G**
No, wasn't it NOVA?
**[13:37] G**
What's HEVA, anyway?
**[13:41] Shin**
Nobody knows?!
**[13:43] Gin**
Oh, you didn't know?
**[13:45] Gin**
I thought everyone knew.
**[13:47] Shin**
Like hell they would!
You haven't explained a thing!
**[13:50] Gin**
Can't you tell at a glance?
**[13:52] Gin**
Aside from the Liberation Army thing,
**[13:54] Gin**
the world was nearly ended seven times
by the Hedora inside Hedoro-san.
**[13:58] Gin**
Isn't it obvious that it was all resolved
by them turning into HEVA in the end?
**[14:01] Shin**
Not even an ESPer could get that!
**[14:03] Gin**
Long story short, I realized that we have
no choice but to use this demon's power.
**[14:08] Gin**
We turn humanity's greatest
threat into its greatest savior
**[14:11] Gin**
and hit the Liberation Army with it.
**[14:13] Gin**
That's the All-Purpose Demonoid
Final Battle Weapon, Hevandorogon.
**[14:17] Shin**
What kind of preposterous
monster have you created?!
**[14:20] Gin**
Don't worry. Through trial and error,
**[14:23] Gin**
I found the perfect way to use both
the angel's and the demon's powers.
**[14:27] Gin**
It can even play the straight man now.
**[14:29] Gin**
Try playing the fool.
**[14:31] Shin**
U-Uh, this is sudden.
I'm the straight man, anyway.
**[14:34] Hed**
What the heck? Want me to destroy humanity?!
**[14:39] Gin**
If I use the right lever, like so,
**[14:41] Gin**
the demon of destruction Hedora's
personality will come to the forefront.
**[14:45] Gin**
He's mainly in charge of jabs and
opening stuck lids on jars of jam.
**[14:49] Shin**
What are you using that demonic power for?!
**[14:51] Shin**
He was aiming his jabs at humanity!
He hasn't given up on destroying humanity!
**[14:55] Shin**
Meanwhile, the left lever
is for cleaning up the mess.
**[14:58] Hed**
Shinpachi-kun, I'm sorry
Hedora was violent with you.
**[15:02] Shin**
H-Hedoro-san, thank you so...
**[15:04] Hed**
Watch out! There's a ladybug!
**[15:07] Shin**
Almost nothing's changed!
**[15:08] Shin**
Looks like it was safe. Thank goodness.
**[15:12] Gin**
I'll use the angel or demon, depending
on the situation, and protect humanity.
**[15:17] Gin**
That's the gist of the Human
Instrumentality Project.
**[15:19] Shin**
But I saw nothing but demon!
**[15:21] Shin**
You sure this isn't the Ladybug
Instrumentality Project?!
**[15:24] Hed**
What the heck? Want me to destroy humanity?!
**[15:27] Shin**
He returned my jab with a jab!
**[15:29] Gin**
You spewed sorely mistaken nonsense.
In other words, you played the fool.
**[15:33] Gin**
Better watch your mouth, or I'll
deem it a comedy act and jab at it.
**[15:37] Shin**
This is bad! The demon's got
another demon riding on top!
**[15:39] Kon**
Stop it, Odd Jobs! It's too dangerous!
**[15:42] Kon**
That thing's throwing jabs not
at fools, but at humanity itself!
**[15:47] Kon**
Eventually, its jabs will even hit you!
**[15:51] Gin**
Even so, I have to keep throwing jabs
**[15:55] Gin**
until the world drops this
unfunny joke about ending.
**[15:59] Kon**
In that case, knock me out before you go!
**[16:04] Gin**
You're in the way. Move.
**[16:05] Kon**
What's wrong? Come on, give me a jab!
**[16:10] Gin**
I can't.
**[16:12] Gin**
Because you're not a human.
**[16:15] Gin**
You're an ape.
**[16:17] Kon**
Knock me out.
**[16:21] Kon**
Come on, knock me out.
**[16:25] Kon**
Please knock me out!
**[16:28] Hed**
Watch out! There's a cockroach!
**[16:35] Shin**
How do you even respond to this?!
**[16:41] Tae**
Demon? More like a god.
**[16:44] Tae**
And that god is telling you to get
some rest, for tonight at least.
**[16:49] Tae**
So don't worry about it, Hedoro-san.
**[16:51] Tae**
It's this moron's fault for toying
with someone like they were a robot.
**[16:55] Hed**
I'm terribly sorry.
**[16:57] Hed**
In my eyes, both Sakata-san and cockroaches
are equally my friends on Earth.
**[17:02] Tae**
Jeez, cheer up!
**[17:05] Tae**
This guy deserves to be treated
worse than a cockroach!
**[17:07] Hed**
What the heck? Want me to destroy humanity?!
**[17:10] Gin**
He cheered up too much!
**[17:12] Gin**
Quit messing with that branch under the
pretext of offering an olive branch!
**[17:15] Shin**
But you really should get some rest.
**[17:18] Shin**
The war will continue tomorrow
and thereafter, too.
**[17:20] Gin**
Tell your sister that!
**[17:22] Shin**
Thinking back, you've been
fighting constantly for ages.
**[17:27] Shin**
You always fight until you're a mess.
**[17:29] Shin**
In truth, you must be really worn out, right?
**[17:33] Gin**
I could say the same about you guys.
**[17:36] Gin**
I ran you two into the ground, after all.
**[17:40] Gin**
For unpaid interns, you did great work.
**[17:43] Gin**
You did well to keep up with such a lowlife.
**[17:48] Gin**
But, maybe because you were
with such an unreliable adult,
**[17:52] Gin**
you've both grown much stronger.
**[18:11] Tae**
Looks like they've taken over the futon.
**[18:14] Tae**
If they'd stayed up a little longer, they
could've heard some rare words of praise.
**[18:20] Gin**
I guess they still have a ways to go.
**[18:22] Gin**
And so do I.
**[18:29] Oki**
Hijikata-san, just when will
we be able to rest?
**[18:33] Hij**
If the world ends, we'll get
more sleep than we'd ever want.
**[18:36] Hij**
Enjoy the street life while you still can.
**[18:39] Oki**
The only things you can enjoy
in this pitch-dark world
**[18:42] Oki**
are sleep and sex.
**[18:44] Oki**
Did you know?
**[18:46] Oki**
Every city that experiences a huge blackout
has higher birthrates the next year.
**[18:56] Hij**
That's what I'm looking for.
**[18:58] Oki**
Huh? Someone to sleep with?
**[18:59] Hij**
Hell no!
**[19:01] Hij**
The man who went beyond blackout and broke
every machine in Edo, Hiraga Gengai.
**[19:06] Hij**
Without that virus cannon that stopped
the enemy fleet and severed their comms,
**[19:11] Hij**
we wouldn't be here right now.
**[19:14] Hij**
But as things stand, we can't link
up with the guys in space, either.
***SIGN*** Sleep well and build up energy.
**[19:21] Hij**
We'll have to get him to help
us communicate in some way.
**[19:25] G**
Old man Gengai? Haven't seen him in a while.
**[19:28] G**
I think he was nearly caught by a mercenary
squad, but managed to get away.
**[19:33] G**
Dunno after that, though.
**[19:35] G**
Gengai-san? Yeah, I ran away with him.
**[19:39] G**
But partway, he said he had
to answer nature's call,
**[19:43] G**
and then he didn't come back...
**[19:45] G**
Huh? Gengai?
**[19:46] G**
He was hiding in the shadows over
there and yelling for toilet paper.
**[19:57] Hij**
Hear us out while you wipe.
**[20:00] Hij**
We need a favor from you, Gengai.
**[20:06] Hij**
Gengai?
**[20:09] Y**
Gengai, was it?
**[20:11] Y**
Surely you know why you're here.
**[20:14] Gen**
Yeah. You want me to clean
up the mess I caused, right?
**[20:19] Gen**
Even as your allies were taken out,
**[20:22] Gen**
you sat back and watched, so where
is all this coming from now?
**[20:26] Y**
We never intended on fighting
alongside complete idiots.
**[20:31] Y**
Gengai, stop that nanomachine virus.
**[20:35] G**
Bad news! Old man Gengai!
**[20:40] Hij**
Gengai has fallen into enemy hands!
**[20:44] Tsu**
Huh? You say something?
**[20:47] Hij**
No. Nothing at all.
**[20:50] Mat**
This is one unpleasant night.
**[20:54] Mat**
It's so quiet, it's almost creepy.
**[20:58] Mat**
I guess bonus stages never
last very long, huh?
**[21:05] Mat**
I hope they're getting some
rest while they still can.
**[21:14] Soyo**
You can't sleep either,
**[21:15] Soyo**
Nobume-san?
**[21:18] Nob**
I can't sleep well after getting
injured and being a burden.
**[21:22] Soyo**
Sorry I caused you unnecessary concern.
**[21:24] Soyo**
But don't worry about keeping watch.
**[21:26] Soyo**
I have the bodyguard the
Odd Jobs left with me.
**[21:31] Soyo**
Oh, it's fine. Let him sleep.
**[21:37] Soyo**
Sorry, I don't know how to play
the straight man very well.
**[21:42] Soyo**
Come to think of it, something
similar happened before, didn't it?
**[21:46] Soyo**
I threw a tantrum, saying
I was too lonely to sleep,
**[21:50] Soyo**
but I hadn't experienced truly
lonely nights back then.
**[21:56] Nob**
We, the Hitotsubashi Faction, are the ones
who put you siblings through all this.
**[22:01] Nob**
I really have no right to
be by your side like this.
**[22:07] Soyo**
Just as you know my pain,
**[22:10] Soyo**
I know your pain, too.
**[22:16] Soyo**
Isn't that enough, Nobume-san?
**[22:19] Soyo**
Let's get through this night,
the two of us togeth—
**[22:24] Nob**
Princess, I don't really know how
to play the straight man, either.
**[22:36] Nob**
What?
**[22:40] NbNb**
*Come...*
**[22:42] NbNb**
*Co... in.*
**[22:44] NbNb**
*Come in.*
**[22:45] Soyo**
Were the comms restored?
**[22:48] NbNb**
*Somebody... Is anybody there?*
**[22:53] NbNb**
*Respond.*
**[22:55] Soyo**
Hello. I'm Tokugawa Shigeshige's
younger sister,
**[23:00] Soyo**
Soyo.
**[23:04] Soyo**
Nobunobu-sama...
**[23:06] Soyo**
It's you, isn't it?
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Bushido Is Found One Second Before Death
***SIGN*** Breaking news.
***SIGN*** Breaking news.
***SIGN*** After the next episode,
***SIGN*** Gintama will be taking a short break.
# 353 - Bushido Is Found One Second Before Death
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** The first half of the Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** reaches its climax!
***SIGN*** That man
***SIGN*** joins the fray, too.
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright room
and at a safe distance from your TV!!
**[01:47] Soy**
I'm Tokugawa Shigeshige's little sister,
**[01:50] Soy**
Soyo.
**[01:52] Soy**
*Nobunobu-sama...*
**[01:54] Soy**
*It's you, isn't it?*
**[01:58] Sak**
What's wrong, Shogun-sama?
**[02:00] Sak**
Weren't you tryin' ta get in touch
with your retainers on Earth?
**[02:08] Sak**
* Hello. I'm Sakamoto*
* Tatsuma, of the Kaientai.*
**[02:13] Sak**
* For reasons, I'm workin'*
* with the shogun right now.*
**[02:17] Sak**
Don't worry. He's perfectly fine.
**[02:20] Sak**
And...
**[02:24] G**
Admiral!
**[02:27] Sak**
With the support of Liberation Army
Admiral Shijaku and his faction,
**[02:31] Sak**
we've just broken out of jail!
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Bushido Is Found
One Second Before Death
**[02:42] G**
*The comms have been restored.*
**[02:44] G**
*What's going on?*
**[02:46] G**
Don't tell me, old man Gengai...
**[02:48] G**
If the enemy's weapons start
working again, we're done for!
**[02:50] Hij**
Hurry!
**[02:51] Hij**
No matter what, we must find Gengai
and free him from the enemy!
**[02:56] Gin**
Calm down, you guys.
**[02:59] Gin**
That geezer ain't the type to
become the enemy's puppet.
**[03:03] Gin**
He'll die quietly for us.
**[03:04] Shin**
Don't kill him off!
**[03:06] Gin**
Don't worry.
**[03:07] Gin**
He's a surprisingly good communicator,
**[03:09] Gin**
so he'll do fine in space or in hell.
**[03:11] Shin**
Stop killing him off already!
**[03:13] Gin**
In more pressing matters,
**[03:16] Gin**
I need to take some Hepa,
and I need you to get me a sick bag.
**[03:18] Gin**
Wait a second. Don't shake me so much.
**[03:21] Gin**
I feel sick...
**[03:24] Hij**
Hey! Why would you drink
until you puke during a war?!
**[03:27] Gin**
I figured this was the save
point before the last boss, too.
**[03:32] Gin**
I was planning on recovering all my HP.
**[03:34] Gin**
But when I woke up, I found myself
rolling in a pit of poison.
**[03:37] Gin**
My status screen had turned green.
**[03:39] Gin**
Real life doesn't have save points.
**[03:42] Gin**
Life is all about how your hitbox
grows larger with each step you take.
**[03:46] Gin**
In the first place, do you have
proof the geezer was abducted?
**[03:50] Oki**
He was caught when he took an outdoor
dump and was immobile due to no TP.
**[03:54] Oki**
There was an unfinished
sh*t left on the scene.
**[03:58] Oki**
And yet there was no sign he wiped.
**[04:00] Gin**
So that means he was taken somewhere
with sh*t still stuck to his ass.
**[04:04] Gia**
What the hell? That's the most
useless deduction ever.
**[04:06] Gia**
Can you stake your gramps's name on it?
Wouldn't you be ashamed to face him?
**[04:09] Shin**
Even if so, maybe Gengai-san left us a clue.
**[04:15] Oki**
A clue, huh?
**[04:18] Shin**
I see.
**[04:21] Shin**
Looks like we've hit the jackpot.
**[04:24] Shin**
Okita-san, that's just sh*t.
We've sh*t the jackpot.
**[04:27] Oki**
Take a closer look.
**[04:30] Shin**
The sh*ts are in regular intervals?
**[04:32] Oki**
He must've left these markers
for us so we could find him.
**[04:37] Shin**
What kind of Hansel and Gretel is that?
**[04:39] Oki**
If we follow these, we should find Gengai.
**[04:43] Hij**
Hey, Sogo, can you stake your
gramps's name on it? You can, right?
**[04:48] Gin**
It's probably some stray dog's poop.
**[04:50] Shin**
Isn't this a bit too orderly for that?
**[04:52] Hij**
And can one person really poop this much?
**[04:55] Oki**
He might be in danger.
**[04:57] Oki**
Let's hurry.
**[05:03] Kon**
I guess I drank too much since
I saw her after so long.
**[05:07] Kon**
I was going to pretend it never happened,
**[05:10] Kon**
but I believed that you guys would notice.
**[05:15] Kon**
Did you buy spare underwear for me?
**[05:20] Kon**
Toshi!
**[05:21] Oki**
Oops. It was just a stray gorilla.
**[05:23] Hij**
Yeah, that was a stray gorilla.
There was no human there.
**[05:26] Hij**
Got that, you guys?
**[05:27] Shin**
I mean, sure, but are you okay with
your leader being a stray gorilla?
**[05:32] Shin**
But what now? We're out of leads again.
**[05:37] Hij**
Hey, look at that.
**[05:39] Shin**
Blood stains? Don't tell me...
**[05:42] Hij**
This might be the clue Gengai left us.
**[05:45] Shin**
No... You mean Gengai-san is...
**[05:47] Hij**
Dunno, but we need to hurry.
That much is for sure.
**[05:51] Oki**
Hijikata-san,
**[05:52] Oki**
can you stake gopchang on that?
**[05:52] [SONG] Sign**
Gopchang
(Small Intestines)
**[05:54] Hij**
Why do I have to stake gopchang?
Let me stake my gramps's name, too!
**[05:58] Shin**
Look, the blood's gradually increasing!
**[06:01] Hij**
This is bad! Hurry!
**[06:06] Zen**
I-I drank too much and had
a hemorrhoid explosion.
**[06:10] Zen**
But I believed that you
would definitely notice.
***SIGN*** Poraginol A
**[06:14] Zen**
Please apply this to my ass.
**[06:19] Hij**
Hey!
**[06:20] Hij**
Your drinking party has left everyone in
tatters, their lower halves in particular!
**[06:24] Gin**
Don't try to worm out of it with a jab.
**[06:25] Gin**
Your deduction was off the mark, so
hurry up and bring out the gopchang.
**[06:28] Hij**
Make him bring out his gramps first!
**[06:30] Oki**
Sorry, Hijikata-san,
**[06:32] Oki**
my gramps died a long time ago,
so you hurry up and die, too.
**[06:36] Hij**
What kind of logic is that? You guys
have no right to speak of deductions!
**[06:39] Shin**
Enough already! This isn't the time!
**[06:43] Hij**
We'll have to use the comms and have
people check every nook and cranny.
**[06:47] Kag**
This way.
**[06:50] Shin**
Kagura-chan?
**[06:51] Oki**
You have an idea where he might be?
**[06:55] Kag**
Trust my instincts.
**[06:58] Kag**
It's on nights like these that the
rabbits of the night turn into hunters.
**[07:06] En**
Oh? He still has his ears and nose, I see.
**[07:10] Y**
* It's easy to tell if torture will work*
* on someone by looking at their face.*
**[07:16] Gen**
*Hey.*
**[07:18] Gen**
* You the leader of the Liberation*
* Army? I finally get to talk to you.*
**[07:23] Gen**
*As you can see, the comms are back up.*
**[07:26] Gen**
*I wanted to get a good look at your face,*
**[07:29] Gen**
*so I set the virus up to go light.*
**[07:31] Gen**
*But the nanomachines won't stop.*
**[07:35] Gen**
*You guys won't get anywhere close to Earth.*
**[07:38] Gen**
* Because I don't know how*
* to stop them, either.*
**[07:43] En**
I figured.
**[07:45] En**
But that goes the same for us.
**[07:48] En**
We cannot stop anymore.
**[07:51] En**
We, the Altana Liberation Army,
**[07:54] En**
gathered and took up arms to free
planets from the Tendoshu's clutches.
**[07:58] En**
If any planet refuses to accept our crusade,
**[08:01] En**
if any planet decides to fight us,
**[08:03] En**
we will grant their wish.
**[08:06] En**
Earth, and all of the insects living on it,
**[08:10] En**
will be reduced to space dust!
**[08:15] Shi**
Forgive me.
**[08:16] Shi**
I forced you guys to commit treason, too.
**[08:20] G**
It's fine, sir.
**[08:22] Shi**
Did anything happen while I was in prison?
**[08:26] G**
Admiral, Prince Ensho is...
**[08:29] Sak**
We will now work with Admiral Shijaku,
**[08:33] Sak**
as well as his home planet, Okoku,
**[08:35] Sak**
and Okoku's Prince Dragonia.
**[08:37] Sak**
and Stup—I mean Prince Hata,
**[08:41] Sak**
and take over the Heavenly Bird,
mothership of the Liberation Army's fleet.
**[08:46] Sak**
There's still a huge numerical disadvantage,
**[08:49] Sak**
but we're already on the mothership.
**[08:51] Sak**
If we use this situation ta our
advantage, things could work out.
**[08:55] ---**
So please pass on a message
ta the guys fightin' on Earth:
**[08:59] ---**
"Hang in there just a bit longer.
**[09:02] ---**
And let's stay alive and
meet on Earth for sure."
**[09:08] ---**
Will that do, Shogun-sama?
**[09:12] Shi**
What?!
**[09:13] Shi**
I-Is that true?
**[09:15] Sak**
Admiral?
**[09:17] Sak**
What's wrong?
**[09:19] Shi**
I'm sorry,
**[09:21] Shi**
my friends from Earth.
**[09:24] Shi**
Everything was too late.
**[09:29] En**
Weapon of destruction,
the Flame of Kagutsuchi.
**[09:33] En**
The Heavenly Bird is but a
platform for this massive weapon.
**[09:37] En**
Since it has the power to
destroy a planet in one shot,
**[09:41] En**
it was deemed a forbidden weapon
and sealed away for ages...
**[09:46] Shi**
But we brought it back when
we started our crusade.
**[09:50] Shi**
The Flame of Kagutsuchi has
already begun preparing to fire.
**[09:57] Shi**
In other words,
**[09:58] Shi**
six hours from now, that blue planet
will be gone from the universe.
**[10:05] Gen**
*If you can't get close to Earth,*
**[10:08] Gen**
* you'll finish things off*
* with one shot from space?*
**[10:11] Gen**
* After making so many sacrifices in this*
* war, you want to reduce it to nothing?*
**[10:16] Gen**
* Along with your comrades still on this*
* planet, who joined you in your cause?*
**[10:22] En**
That's the reason.
**[10:24] En**
To ensure that our comrades'
sacrifices aren't in vain,
**[10:27] En**
our crusade cannot end in a loss.
**[10:30] En**
Our comrades on Earth would be glad to
become the foundation for our victory.
**[10:38] G**
Prince, what exactly are we fighting?
**[10:43] G**
Destroy a planet along
with our comrades on it?
**[10:45] G**
Wouldn't that make us the
same as the Tendoshu?
**[10:50] G**
Please stop, Prince.
**[10:53] G**
This is no crusade!
**[10:56] En**
Just cause is but an excuse readied for
weaklings who can't fight without a reason.
**[11:05] En**
I knew all along
**[11:07] En**
that defeating the Tendoshu won't
bring back what we've lost.
**[11:13] En**
Then why do we fight?
**[11:17] En**
Isn't it because that's the
only thing we have left?
**[11:25] En**
Having lost even our means to
soothe our hatred and sorrow,
**[11:31] En**
all we can do is keep burning
them in the flames of war.
**[11:36] En**
It is as you see.
**[11:38] En**
We're prepared to walk over the
corpses of our comrades to fight...
**[11:43] G**
Prince!
**[11:44] Sak**
*Run!*
**[11:49] Shi**
There's no time!
**[11:50] Shi**
Or any shot at victory!
**[11:52] Sak**
So what?
**[11:54] Sak**
Whether we have a shot at victory or not,
what we must do remains the same!
**[12:09] Sak**
*Yeah. It changes nothing.*
**[12:12] Sak**
* Whoever said bushido is found in*
* death was right on the money.*
**[12:18] G**
The reinforcements from
Planet Okoku have arrived.
**[12:20] Kat**
Good.
**[12:22] Kat**
Deploy at the edge of the Liberation
Army's radar net at once.
**[12:26] Kat**
Lure the enemy fleet as far away
from its mothership as possible.
**[12:29] Kat**
We'll use that chance to raid the
mothership with our stealth ship.
**[12:33] Hata**
Why is this happening?
**[12:35] Kat**
So says Prince Dragonia.
**[12:39] Sak**
*Even if the end will arrive in one second,*
**[12:43] Sak**
* live your life so you*
* don't leave any regrets.*
**[12:46] Sak**
*That's the samurai way.*
**[12:54] Gin**
I will never drink again!
**[12:59] Soy**
*Sakamoto-san...*
**[13:01] Soy**
*Sakamoto-san!*
**[13:04] Soy**
Sakamoto-san! Sakamoto-san!
**[13:10] NbNb**
*Rest assured.*
**[13:12] NbNb**
* I will protect Edo and our*
* country, no matter what.*
**[13:18] NbNb**
*That's what your brother would say, right?*
**[13:27] NbNb**
That's what a real shogun would say.
**[13:29] NbNb**
Unfortunately, I have neither the
right nor the capability to do so,
**[13:35] NbNb**
but I do have the right to act
as the country's stepping stone.
**[13:40] NbNb**
So many people died failing to
protect what they wished to protect,
**[13:44] NbNb**
and I have the right to die for
the things they left behind.
**[13:53] NbNb**
*Forgive me.*
**[13:58] Soy**
*I won't forgive you.*
**[14:01] Soy**
*Unless you come back alive,*
**[14:07] Soy**
I won't forgive you.
**[14:10] Soy**
Come back here, accompany
me to Brother's grave,
**[14:16] Soy**
and report to him that we protected Edo.
**[14:19] Soy**
If you don't...
**[14:24] Soy**
I'll never forgive you!
**[14:33] Y**
That prince came up with
quite the interesting plan.
**[14:38] Y**
To think he would threaten us, too...
**[14:41] Y**
Let the Liberation Army on Earth know.
**[14:44] G**
"HQ has abandoned us.
**[14:47] G**
If you want to avoid dying with Earth,
**[14:50] G**
you only have two options:
**[14:52] G**
either do something about
the nanomachine virus,
**[14:55] G**
or bring down this country by dawn"?
**[14:59] G**
Elder Son, what shall we do?
**[15:07] Son**
Isn't it obvious?
**[15:09] Son**
We'll survive and kill that brat.
**[15:12] Son**
Gengai, you say you don't have the
means to stop the nanomachine virus,
**[15:17] Son**
but what if I say it can be
the means to kill that prince?
**[15:26] En**
How pitiful.
**[15:28] En**
They are Earth's last hope?
**[15:31] G**
I-Is this an error?
**[15:33] En**
What's the matter?
**[15:34] G**
The radar is detecting several
ships behind the Heavenly Bird.
**[15:38] G**
But there's no way such a
large army could be here...
**[15:42] Hata**
*It's no error.*
**[15:45] Hata**
Members of the Liberation Army,
**[15:47] Hata**
your actions toward Earth are nothing but
an invasion in the name of liberation!
**[15:54] Hata**
Even if the universe will stand
for this savagery, we will not!
**[16:00] Hata**
Planet Okoku's...
**[16:02] Hata**
...Gramps says he won't stand for it.
**[16:04] Jii**
Wh-Why, you!
**[16:05] Jii**
Why are you trying to blame someone else
and save your skin now, Prince Hog?
**[16:09] Hata**
But I haven't done anything!
**[16:11] Hata**
I was just suddenly carried off and
told to read this note out loud!
**[16:15] Jii**
Then I've done practically
nothing all these years!
**[16:18] Jii**
All I did was grow my beard!
I was just a walking corpse!
**[16:21] Hata**
Do some damn work!
**[16:23] Hata**
*How'd things end up like this, anyway?*
**[16:25] Hata**
* Who was it that said we'd fight?*
* He can read the note!*
**[16:28] Jii**
*Which one of you said we'd fight?*
**[16:30] Jii**
*Raise your hand! I won't yell at you!*
**[16:33] Hata**
*Fine. Everyone close your eyes.*
**[16:35] Hata**
*I'll close mine, too.*
**[16:37] Hata**
*Only the Liberation Army needs to know.*
**[16:39] Jii**
*Don't peek. No cheating, okay?*
**[16:42] Jii**
*Whoever stole the lunch money, fess up!*
**[16:44] Hata**
*Not the lunch money bit!*
**[16:45] Mad**
*No fair! That was a fake-out?*
**[16:47] Mad**
*You all said you'd keep your eyes closed!*
**[16:49] Hata**
*There was a lunch money thief among us!*
**[16:51] Mad**
*Not exactly lunch money.*
**[16:52] Mad**
* You only fed me dog food, so I just stole*
* some of your pudding from the fridge!*
**[16:56] Hata**
* I was wondering why my royal pudding*
* always went missing! It was you?*
**[17:00] Mad**
*Shut it!*
**[17:00] Mad**
* You get to eat amazing food every*
* day, so quit whining over pudding!*
**[17:04] Jii**
*Prince, let me handle this punk.*
**[17:06] Jii**
*How dare you steal my one job?!*
**[17:08] Jii**
*Give back my pudding!*
**[17:10] Hata**
*You ate them, too?!*
**[17:15] G**
Follow the prince!
**[17:17] G**
Open intercepting fire!
**[17:30] Kat**
So it begins. I hope they
manage to escape later.
**[17:35] Kat**
Then shall we go, too?
**[17:39] Kat**
I hope you're all ready.
**[17:41] G**
Katsura-san, you needn't ask now.
**[17:44] G**
We'll expel the aliens threatening
our country to protect it.
**[17:47] G**
We are...
**[17:50] Kat**
I am...
**[17:52] Kat**
Joi Rebel Katsura Kotaro!
**[17:55] Kat**
I swear on my name that I shall deliver
divine judgment upon the Liberation Army!
**[18:00] Kat**
Let's go!
**[18:09] En**
Beautiful.
**[18:14] En**
Such a pure, beautiful light.
**[18:19] En**
There's no doubt about it.
**[18:22] En**
This is a crusade.
**[18:27] Hij**
Earth will blow in six hours?
**[18:30] Hij**
Is that why the Liberation
Army's on the move again?
**[18:34] Mat**
* I didn't expect them to give their troops*
* a kick up their backside this way.*
**[18:38] Hij**
Is there anything we can do, Pops?
**[18:40] Mat**
Well, are there any cabaret clubs still open?
**[18:43] Hij**
*Don't go giving up!*
**[18:45] Mat**
No! I'm sure there are cabaret girls
who will fight until the world ends.
**[18:50] Hij**
*I wasn't talking about them!*
**[18:51] Mat**
Toshi, giving up isn't such a bad thing.
**[18:55] Mat**
You guys throw Earth aside
and go rescue Gengai!
**[18:59] Hij**
* Earth is the one thing we*
* shouldn't throw aside!*
**[19:03] Gin**
It's not like you'll throw it at nobody.
**[19:09] Gin**
I don't know if they're worthy of
being tasked with saving the world,
**[19:13] Gin**
but there are some guys who are
even more persistent than us...
**[19:17] Gin**
There's a guy who won't sit back
and watch the world be destroyed.
**[19:21] Gin**
That's for sure.
**[19:24] Kat**
What's going on?
**[19:25] G**
We've been hit!
**[19:26] Kat**
No... Does the enemy mothership have
**[19:29] Kat**
some scouting function that
surpasses our stealth function?!
**[19:34] Kat**
Don't falter!
**[19:35] Kat**
Charge in!
**[19:39] Shi**
Hurry this way!
**[19:43] Shi**
Fall back!
**[19:44] Shi**
Change direction!
**[19:53] G**
The control system broke!
**[19:55] G**
We can't steer!
**[19:56] G**
At this rate, we won't
reach the enemy mothership!
**[19:58] G**
Katsura-san!
**[20:07] Sak**
One after another...
**[20:14] En**
Burn.
**[20:16] En**
Turn into ash.
**[20:39] G**
We're under attack from the right!
**[20:40] G**
That's...
**[20:43] G**
That fleet is...
**[20:51] Kat**
What the—
**[20:57] Tak**
What are you wasting time for?
**[21:00] Tak**
Keep up or I'll leave you behind,
**[21:02] Tak**
Zura.
**[21:29] Tak**
This won't do.
**[21:32] Tak**
I don't care if you're the
Liberation Army or whatever,
**[21:35] Tak**
but you can't do whatever
you want while I'm gone.
**[21:38] Tak**
You're hurting my business.
**[21:42] Sak**
Y-You...
**[21:44] Tak**
A weapon of destruction that'll erase Earth?
**[21:47] Tak**
Sorry, but it won't get a chance to shine.
**[21:53] Tak**
The one to destroy this world
**[21:58] Tak**
will be me.
***SIGN*** The Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** will be back.
***SIGN*** Look forward to it!!
***SIGN*** You know how plays and old movies
***SIGN*** have breaks in the middle?
***SIGN*** Sorry, but we're doing the same.
***SIGN*** It's now the intermission.
# 354 - The Evildoers Who Do Good
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Emergency Rescue
***SIGN*** Defend Kabuki District from the Amanto!
**[00:09] [SONG] Sign**
Operation: Drain the Pond!
**[00:13] Ex**
Gin-san, do your best!
***SIGN*** Watch Operation: Drain the Pond in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!
**[00:15] Gin**
That's a lot of sludge.
**[00:17] Kag**
I can't wait to see what kind
of alien species we find.
**[00:20] Shin**
Uh...
**[00:22] Shin**
Hey, guys!
**[00:24] Shin**
Gin-san, Kagura-chan!
**[00:26] Shin**
What the heck are you doing?!
**[00:28] Gin**
Draining the pond.
**[00:30] Shin**
Yeah, I can tell!
**[00:31] Shin**
It's the Gintama anime's first episode
of the final arc's second half!
**[00:35] Shin**
I'm asking why you're draining a
pond in such a crucial episode!
**[00:39] Kag**
What are you talking about, Shinpachi?
**[00:41] Kag**
We've gotta hook the viewers
with the very first episode!
**[00:45] Kag**
Pointless shows about stuff like draining
ponds tend to have surprisingly good ratings.
**[00:50] Kag**
True story!
**[00:52] Shin**
Why're you acting like a trailblazer when
you're just ripping off another show?!
**[00:56] Shin**
Get to the actual story!
**[00:57] Gin**
Dude, did you even see
how the first half ended?
**[01:00] Gin**
What was that all about?
**[01:01] Gin**
A guy who had no screen time
for an entire cour
**[01:04] Gin**
gets a close-up of his smug face, steals
the spotlight, and that's how it ends?
**[01:08] Gin**
We can't do anything but drain a pond now.
**[01:10] Shin**
Uh, I don't follow your logic at all!
**[01:12] Gin**
You still don't get it, Shinpachi?
**[01:14] Gin**
This is intricately linked to the
*Gintama* anime's actual story!
**[01:17] Shin**
Huh?
**[01:18] Gin**
We earthlings have, until now,
**[01:20] Gin**
have just looked on as the Amanto took over
our towns and did whatever they wanted.
**[01:25] Gin**
And now, we've even ended
up at war with them.
**[01:28] Gin**
Unless we weed out the root cause,
**[01:30] Gin**
the Kabuki District will never have peace.
**[01:34] Gin**
In other words,
**[01:35] Gin**
we must get rid of the
alien species in the pond!
**[01:38] Shin**
I don't get it at all!
**[01:40] Shin**
You're just riding on the
coattails of a hit show!
**[01:41] Kag**
Oh, we drained most of
the water while arguing.
**[01:42] Shin**
Isn't that right? Fess up!
**[01:44] Gin**
Where are those damn alien species?
**[01:46] Kag**
Gin-chan, look!
**[01:52] Gin**
Could they be...
**[01:54] Gin**
In the first half,
**[01:56] Gin**
they were among the characters rushing
to the Kabuki District's aid!
**[02:18] Gin**
Let's begin the second half, shall we?
**[02:21] Gin**
Take care of the narration, Pachi-boy.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** The Story So Far
**[02:28] Shin**
*The land of the samurai.*
**[02:30] Shin**
* There was a time, long ago, when our*
* country was called by that name.*
**[02:35] Shin**
* The Altana Liberation Army was formed*
* to end the Tendoshu's galactic rule.*
**[02:40] Shin**
* They invaded Earth with their*
* mothership, the Heavenly Bird.*
**[02:45] Shin**
* Despite the overwhelming*
* difference in strength,*
**[02:47] Shin**
*we rose up to defend Edo and Earth.*
**[02:52] Shin**
*The Oniwaban,*
**[02:54] Shin**
*the Shinsengumi,*
**[02:55] Shin**
* and countless people who*
* love the Kabuki District*
**[02:57] Shin**
* threw themselves headlong*
* into a reckless battle.*
**[03:01] Shin**
*In space, Katsura-san, Sakamoto-san,*
**[03:04] Shin**
* and Shogun Tokugawa Nobunobu*
* entered negotiations*
**[03:07] Shin**
* and won over Admiral Shijaku,*
* one of the Liberation Army's top brass.*
**[03:12] Shin**
* However, things didn't go*
* so smoothly after that.*
**[03:17] Shin**
*Dangers assailed us one after another,*
**[03:19] Shin**
*and we sacrificed many things.*
**[03:22] Shin**
* That's when Gengai-san's invention,*
* the nanomachine virus,*
**[03:27] Shin**
* rendered useless the weapons*
* of the Liberation Army,*
**[03:29] Shin**
*who brought the three great warrior races:*
**[03:31] Shin**
*the Dakini,*
**[03:32] Shin**
*the Shinra,*
**[03:33] Shin**
* and the Yato with them to*
* attack the Kabuki District.*
**[03:37] Shin**
*During that desperate back-and-forth battle,*
**[03:39] Shin**
*several people jumped in to help,*
**[03:42] Shin**
* and we somehow managed to force the*
* Liberation Army into a temporary retreat.*
**[03:48] Shin**
*But our joy was short-lived.*
**[03:49] Shin**
*Gengai-san was abducted by Yato,*
**[03:52] Shin**
* and over in space, a weapon that could*
* obliterate a planet in one shot,*
**[03:55] Shin**
*the Flame of Kagutsuchi, was activated.*
**[03:57] Shin**
* The countdown to Earth's*
* destruction had begun.*
**[04:00] Shin**
* Katsura-san's party found*
* themselves in grave peril.*
**[04:02] Shin**
*That's when* he *showed up.*
**[04:07] Tak**
A weapon of destruction that'll erase Earth?
**[04:11] Tak**
Sorry, but it won't get a chance to shine.
**[04:17] Tak**
The one to destroy this world
**[04:22] Tak**
will be me.
**[04:23] G**
Wh-Who is that man?
**[04:30] PA**
*Intruders in Sector 17!*
**[04:31] PA**
* Head there and provide backup*
* at once! I repeat...*
**[04:36] G**
Prince!
**[04:37] G**
Sector 17
**[04:38] G**
and Sector 22 have been
breached by assault ships!
**[04:50] G**
D-Don't move!
**[04:52] G**
You don't have to be so afraid.
**[04:54] G**
Relax.
**[04:56] G**
I'm not on the side of anyone here.
**[04:59] G**
I won't ally with anyone, either.
**[05:03] G**
I'm just...
**[05:06] G**
an enemy to the entire universe!
**[05:08] G**
Fire!
**[05:16] Tak**
Kiheitai!
**[05:18] Tak**
Charge!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[06:55] (Flashback) Mat**
Could you take me with you?
**[06:59] (Flashback) Mat**
I know who you are.
**[07:03] (Flashback) Mat**
I know your goals, too.
**[07:06] (Flashback) Mat**
I'm the same.
**[07:08] (Flashback) Mat**
I've lost everything to war.
**[07:11] (Flashback) Mat**
My father, who fought to
ensure the country's future,
**[07:13] (Flashback) Mat**
was arrested and killed
by that very same country.
**[07:16] (Flashback) Mat**
And my mother died as the wife of a sinner.
**[07:21] (Flashback) Mat**
As the last one left alive,
**[07:24] (Flashback) Mat**
all I can do is avenge my family
using the gun my father left behind!
**[07:30] (Flashback) Mat**
Let me join your quest to
exact revenge on this country!
**[07:34] (Flashback) Mat**
Let me avenge my family!
**[07:36] (Flashback) Tak**
In that case,
**[07:38] (Flashback) Tak**
shoot yourself in the head with that gun.
**[07:43] (Flashback) Tak**
That's the kind of thing I'm trying to do.
**[07:49] (Flashback) Tak**
That's what it means to destroy a country.
**[07:52] (Flashback) Tak**
It's not too late for you.
**[07:54] (Flashback) Tak**
Try and live a smart life.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** The Evildoers Who Do Good
**[08:18] (Flashback) G**
Another Joi Rebel hunt?
**[08:20] (Flashback) G**
They're rounding up anyone they don't like.
**[08:23] (Flashback) G**
What has the world come to?
**[08:27] (Flashback) Ban**
It's a pitiful story.
**[08:30] (Flashback) Ban**
I hear countless innocent people
like her are being imprisoned.
**[08:34] (Flashback) Ban**
What are they doing, when they
have other evildoers to round up?
**[08:38] (Flashback) Ban**
Like, for example,
**[08:40] (Flashback) Ban**
Takasugi Shinsuke.
**[08:43] (Flashback) Ban**
He's one of the Joi Elite Four,
and he's hiding in this area, it seems.
**[08:48] (Flashback) Ban**
That girl was targeted because
she was seen with him.
**[08:53] (Flashback) Tak**
That so?
**[08:54] (Flashback) Tak**
From what I've heard, there's another
big fish swimming these waters.
**[09:00] (Flashback) Tak**
I think his name was...
**[09:01] (Flashback) Tak**
Kawakami Bansai the Manslayer.
**[09:06] (Flashback) Ban**
Never heard of him.
**[09:08] (Flashback) Ban**
Either way, that girl was doomed the moment
she approached one of those villains.
**[09:14] (Flashback) Ban**
I shall perform a requiem for her
so that she may rest in peace.
**[09:32] (Flashback) G**
Hey, you!
**[09:33] (Flashback) G**
What do you think you're doing?
**[09:35] (Flashback) G**
Why do you have a sword?
**[09:37] (Flashback) G**
You must be a Joi Rebel!
**[09:39] (Flashback) Ban**
Quiet. You're ruining my performance.
**[09:41] (Flashback) G**
Say what?
**[09:43] (Flashback) G**
You'd better fix your attitude!
**[09:46] (Flashback) G**
H-Hey!
**[10:08] (Flashback) Ban**
It seems we were set up.
**[10:12] (Flashback) Ban**
That girl was bait laid to capture you,
**[10:16] (Flashback) Ban**
Takasugi Shinsuke.
**[10:18] (Flashback) Tak**
I don't recall falling for their trap.
**[10:23] (Flashback) Tak**
You were the one who spurred me on.
**[10:26] (Flashback) Ban**
Forgive me. I just wanted to see what
kind of man the living legend was.
**[10:30] (Flashback) Tak**
Well? What kind of man was he?
**[10:33] (Flashback) Ban**
It seems he was going around talking
about destroying the world,
**[10:38] (Flashback) Ban**
but if he can't leave a single girl
to die, it's all merely hot air.
**[10:42] (Flashback) Ban**
But I don't mind such idiots.
**[10:46] (Flashback) Tak**
Me, either.
**[10:49] (Flashback) Tak**
A guy who claimed to turn his back on a
country that had turned its back on samurai
**[10:54] (Flashback) Tak**
and was trying to rescue
the Joi Rebels in captivity
**[10:58] (Flashback) Tak**
now finds himself imprisoned
because of one girl.
**[11:01] (Flashback) Tak**
That's a rare degree of stupidity.
**[11:05] (Flashback) Tak**
If you're going to be killed
by the country anyway,
**[11:08] (Flashback) Tak**
why not die for me, Manslayer Bansai?
**[11:12] (Flashback) Ban**
You're recruiting in a prison?
**[11:15] (Flashback) Ban**
Your stupidity knows no bounds.
**[11:18] (Flashback) Ban**
Let me ask you: what will you die for?
**[11:22] (Flashback) Tak**
I won't die.
**[11:24] (Flashback) Tak**
No matter how many corpses I have to
walk over, until I trample this country,
**[11:29] (Flashback) Tak**
I refuse to die.
**[11:33] (Flashback) Ban**
Hardly the words of a man
due to be executed tomorrow.
**[11:37] (Flashback) Ban**
But laying down my life for all
that hot air doesn't sound too bad.
**[11:46] (Flashback) Mat**
Release those men.
**[11:49] (Flashback) Hen**
Goodness gracious.
**[11:51] (Flashback) Hen**
You've had your life saved twice,
and you come back for more?
**[11:54] (Flashback) Hen**
You mustn't throw away
your young and fresh body.
**[12:00] (Flashback) Hen**
Are you trying to make that man accept you?
**[12:03] (Flashback) Mat**
That's not it.
**[12:05] (Flashback) Mat**
I just don't want to let him die.
**[12:09] (Flashback) Mat**
This country needs him.
**[12:12] (Flashback) Mat**
That's all this is about, you lolicon!
**[12:15] (Flashback) Hen**
I see.
**[12:17] (Flashback) Hen**
Then know that there won't be a third
time, and that I'm not a lolicon.
**[12:21] (Flashback) Hen**
As such, I shall stop
treating you as a child now.
**[12:24] (Flashback) Mat**
Don't move!
**[12:28] (Flashback) G**
Kawakami Bansai-dono.
**[12:30] (Flashback) G**
Takasugi Shinsuke-dono, yes?
**[12:33] (Flashback) Ban**
You all!
**[12:34] (Flashback) G**
Everything is ready.
**[12:40] (Flashback) Hen**
You can have this back.
**[12:42] (Flashback) Hen**
What you need to do isn't
point that dagger at me.
**[12:46] (Flashback) Hen**
Get your revenge with your own hands.
**[12:53] (Flashback) Ban**
Did you really win over a bakufu official?
**[13:00] (Flashback) Tak**
Beats me.
**[13:02] (Flashback) Hen**
No. I had no such intentions until now,
**[13:06] (Flashback) Hen**
but I just made up my
mind at this very moment.
**[13:09] (Flashback) Hen**
After all, I'm the same as them...
**[13:12] (Flashback) Hen**
A feminist.
**[13:15] Hen**
How could this be?
**[13:19] Hen**
We hated the world,
**[13:20] Hen**
cursed it with every breath,
**[13:23] Hen**
and came together to destroy it,
**[13:28] Hen**
so why does it look like
we're trying to save it?
**[13:34] Mat**
No, Senpai. Nothing's changed.
**[13:38] Mat**
I know that the Kiheitai was
born to destroy the world...
**[13:48] (Flashback) Tak**
Let's go.
**[13:51] Mat**
And also that it was born
to save a nobody like me.
**[13:56] Mat**
So it doesn't matter
which way the dice roll!
**[14:00] Mat**
Whether we're fighting the
country or the universe,
**[14:04] Mat**
we'll cut down any rotten fiends in our way!
**[14:07] Mat**
That's who Takasugi Shinsuke
and the Kiheitai are!
**[14:17] (Flashback) Gin**
"Win and we're the national
army, lose and we're rebels"?
**[14:21] (Flashback) Gin**
Hey, Zura. We're neither rebels nor losers,
**[14:25] (Flashback) Gin**
so how long are they gonna keep mocking us?
**[14:28] (Flashback) Gin**
If we want to change classes
to the national army,
**[14:30] (Flashback) Gin**
will we need a Zen Book or something?
**[14:34] (Flashback) Kat**
Any group that turns against the
country is called a rebel army.
**[14:38] (Flashback) Kat**
Unless we drive off the Amanto, overturn
the bakufu, and build a new country,
**[14:43] (Flashback) Kat**
we'll never be the national army.
**[14:45] (Flashback) Gin**
Sounds like a hell of a broken game.
**[14:47] (Flashback) Gin**
Changing classes to Baramos
the Demon Lord sounds easier.
**[14:50] (Flashback) Sak**
Don't worry, Gintoki.
**[14:52] (Flashback) Sak**
Even without a Zen Book, players can
become the national army at level 20.
**[14:56] (Flashback) Gin**
That's for sage.
**[14:57] (Flashback) Tak**
Only idiots who become the country's
lapdogs get called national armies, right?
**[15:03] (Flashback) Tak**
Or wait...
**[15:05] (Flashback) Tak**
Did we have anyone honorable enough
to fight for the country or its people?
**[15:10] (Flashback) Gin**
You moron! Half of the Joi War
was born out of kindness.
**[15:14] (Flashback) Gin**
True, it's not the number one motive.
**[15:16] (Flashback) Gin**
But after "I wanna be popular"
and "I wanna let off some steam,"
**[15:19] (Flashback) Gin**
"I love my country" is right there.
**[15:20] (Flashback) Tak**
The Joi War was born mostly out of junk!
**[15:24] (Flashback) Tak**
What does it matter what they call us?
**[15:26] (Flashback) Tak**
We know what we're trying to do.
**[15:30] (Flashback) Tak**
Isn't that enough?
**[15:32] (Flashback) Tak**
Besides, could you guys really
cut it in a national army?
**[15:35] (Flashback) Tak**
Insurgent.
**[15:37] (Flashback) Tak**
Traitor.
**[15:38] (Flashback) Tak**
Rebel.
**[15:40] (Flashback) Tak**
You've all got your perfect titles already.
**[15:43] (Flashback) Gin**
You just like it because
you're an emo edgelord!
**[15:46] (Flashback) Gin**
I mean, you seriously called
your unit "Kiheitai."
**[15:49] (Flashback) Gin**
I wouldn't be able to endure it!
**[15:50] (Flashback) Tak**
What's wrong with Kiheitai?
**[15:52] (Flashback) Gin**
It's so embarrassing, I'd rather
call myself Berserk Biker Gang!
**[15:56] (Flashback) Tak**
You're the only one gone berserk here.
**[15:58] (Flashback) Sak**
No! My d*ck's going wild, too!
**[16:01] (Flashback) Gin**
What the hell are you saying?!
**[16:04] (Flashback) Kat**
National army, huh?
**[16:06] (Flashback) Kat**
Even if the country is overturned one day,
**[16:09] (Flashback) Kat**
we probably won't ever be called that.
**[16:28] Sak**
Those monsters are here.
**[16:31] Sak**
You sure kept us waitin'.
**[16:33] Sak**
But I knew you'd come, Takasugi!
**[16:37] Kat**
Did you come back so
I could cut you in half?!
**[16:40] Tak**
I don't mind fighting you guys first.
**[16:43] Tak**
I'll eventually have to fight
the entire universe, anyway.
**[16:47] Kat**
After trying to take over the nation,
you're going to go after the universe?!
**[16:51] Tak**
Country or universe, there's no difference.
**[16:54] Tak**
Either way, he will
definitely stand in my way.
**[16:58] Tak**
Unless I take him out,
**[17:01] Tak**
I can take neither country nor universe!
**[17:05] Sak**
Ah, I see.
**[17:06] Sak**
As long as that idiot's there,
Earth is in safe hands.
**[17:09] Sak**
We can let loose without worry, eh?
**[17:13] Tak**
Wrong.
**[17:14] Tak**
That nuisance isn't here,
**[17:16] Tak**
so we can take whatever we want.
**[17:18] Tak**
I'll do anything I can.
**[17:21] Tak**
Be it hope, despair, good,
evil, friends, or enemies...
**[17:26] Tak**
Even if I have to use every last one,
**[17:30] Tak**
I'll crush that man.
**[17:34] Tak**
That is my purpose in life
right here, right now.
**[17:47] Shi**
Reinforcements?
**[17:48] Shi**
Hurry, my friends from Earth!
**[17:50] Tak**
Get going.
**[17:52] Tak**
I'll stop that weapon.
**[17:55] Tak**
You two can have the enemy general's head.
**[17:58] Kat**
You...
**[17:59] Tak**
While you're at it,
**[18:01] Tak**
take care of that general, too.
**[18:05] Tak**
Hey.
**[18:06] Tak**
I'm glad to see you still have
a head on your shoulders.
**[18:11] Tak**
Sorry I carried you to shogun
at such a dreadful time.
**[18:17] Tak**
I betrayed you, and you
betrayed me, but rest assured.
**[18:22] Tak**
These guys won't betray you or turn their
backs on you. Not you or this country.
**[18:29] Tak**
So you should also...
**[18:32] Tak**
Go!
**[18:52] Nb**
*I know...*
**[18:55] Nb**
* Who it was that offered their help when*
* our country faced its greatest peril.*
**[19:03] Nb**
* Who it was that were called*
* rebels and traitors,*
**[19:06] Nb**
*but still fought to protect the country.*
**[19:13] Nb**
*You men were still fighting, weren't you?*
**[19:18] Nb**
Hear me, those abandoned by the country.
**[19:21] Nb**
This country will never again betray you.
**[19:27] Nb**
Never again will it cast you aside.
**[19:32] Nb**
Shogun Tokugawa Nobunobu and the
country's crest stand here with you.
**[19:40] Nb**
I won't let anyone call you traitors anymore.
**[19:42] Nb**
You are our country's pride
and joy, its national—
**[19:45] Kat**
Rebel army is fine.
**[19:47] Kat**
We're all right with that.
**[19:50] Nb**
Is that so?
**[19:52] Nb**
* Then I shall join you in*
* the rebel army myself.*
**[19:57] Nb**
*This country... This whole planet*
**[20:01] Nb**
* is a rebel army that stands*
* up to the universe!*
**[20:08] Y**
Found it.
**[20:13] Y**
Several cylinders inside.
**[20:16] Y**
Bring it here at once.
**[20:20] Y**
It seems you weren't lying when
you said you had a countermeasure.
**[20:25] Gen**
An inventor's job is to
create contradictions.
**[20:29] Gen**
If we're told to build an unbreakable shield,
**[20:32] Gen**
we first build the only unstoppable
spear that can break it
**[20:35] Gen**
before comprehending and
completing the shield.
**[20:38] Y**
In other words, you have a way to destroy
the nanomachine virus protecting Edo?
**[20:46] Gen**
I didn't expect it to end up as a spear
that'd destroy the world, though.
**[20:56] Tak**
How do things look?
**[20:57] Hen**
Everything's fine,
**[21:00] Hen**
or so I would like to say.
Our reinforcements are delayed.
**[21:05] Hen**
We can only distract the
enemy for so long...
**[21:09] Ban**
*Worry not, Takechi.*
**[21:10] Ban**
They won't be needed here.
**[21:13] Mat**
More importantly, Senpai,
**[21:14] Mat**
how's the Flame of Kagutsuchi analysis going?
**[21:16] Hen**
Everything's fine on that end.
**[21:19] Hen**
Even if it's a weapon that can erase a
planet, it's based on old technology.
**[21:24] Hen**
There are exploits we can use.
**[21:26] Hen**
However...
**[21:28] Hen**
Even if we stop the Flame of Kagutsuchi,
**[21:32] Hen**
should Earth yield to its threat
and take down that barrier,
**[21:38] Hen**
everything will have been in vain.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:14] Kag**
Within all the bloodlust on the battlefield,
I sense one extraordinary presence.
**[23:18] Y**
Let me show what a real Yato is like!
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Rabbits Leap Higher
on Moonlit Nights
***SIGN*** In space and on Earth,
***SIGN*** a crucial battle has broken out.
***SIGN*** Pirates join the fray, too!
***SIGN*** The rabbits of the night descend upon the battlefield.
# 355 - Rabbits Leap Higher on Moonlit Nights
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!
**[00:05] (Flashback) Mat**
Could you take me with you?
**[00:10] (Flashback) Mat**
Let me join your quest to
exact revenge on this country!
**[00:14] (Flashback) Ban**
It's a pitiful story.
**[00:17] (Flashback) Ban**
I hear countless innocent people
like her are being imprisoned.
**[00:22] (Flashback) Ban**
What are they doing, when they
have other evildoers to round up?
**[00:26] (Flashback) Mat**
Release those men.
**[00:29] (Flashback) Hen**
What you need to do isn't
point that dagger at me.
**[00:34] (Flashback) Hen**
Get your revenge with your own hands.
**[00:38] Tak**
Country or universe, there's no difference.
**[00:42] Tak**
Either way, he will
definitely stand in my way.
**[00:45] Tak**
Unless I take him out,
**[00:47] Tak**
I can take neither country nor universe!
**[00:50] Y**
It seems you weren't lying when
you said you had a countermeasure.
**[00:55] Gen**
An inventor's job is to
create contradictions.
**[00:59] Gen**
If we're told to build an unbreakable shield,
**[01:02] Gen**
we first build the only unstoppable
spear that can break it
**[01:05] Gen**
before comprehending and
completing the shield.
**[01:09] Hen**
We can only distract the
enemy for so long...
**[01:13] Ban**
*Worry not, Takechi.*
**[01:15] Ban**
They won't be needed here.
**[01:17] Mat**
More importantly, Senpai,
**[01:18] Mat**
how's the Flame of Kagutsuchi analysis going?
**[01:21] Hen**
Everything's fine on that end.
**[01:23] Hen**
Even if it's a weapon that can erase a
planet, it's based on old technology.
**[01:28] Hen**
There are exploits we can use.
**[01:30] Hen**
However...
**[01:32] Hen**
Even if we stop the Flame of Kagutsuchi,
**[01:36] Hen**
should Earth yield to its threat
and take down that barrier,
**[01:42] Hen**
everything will have been in vain.
**[01:50] Gin**
Give it a rest!
**[01:51] Gin**
What are you guys, Kintaro candy?!
**[01:53] Gin**
Before I cut down all you similar-looking
idiots, Earth will be destroyed!
**[01:56] Shin**
Damn it! We don't have time
for this! Gengai-san is...
**[01:59] Oki**
Can we really even trust her instincts?
**[02:03] Oki**
Hey, you listenin' to me?
**[02:04] Kag**
Gin-chan, take care of things here!
**[02:06] Gin**
Wait, Kagura!
**[02:08] Gin**
Kagura!
**[02:10] Kag**
*Within all the bloodlust on the battlefield,*
**[02:11] Kag**
*I sense one extraordinary presence...*
**[02:14] Kag**
*I sense Yato!*
**[02:15] Gin**
That numskull! What does
she think she can do alone?
**[02:18] Shin**
Gin-san, we must hurry and go after her!
**[02:20] Hij**
Hey!
**[02:21] Hij**
Look!
**[02:23] Gin**
What is that?
**[02:25] Shin**
Is that the Liberation Army's...
**[02:27] Hij**
No way... Run away!
**[02:29] Shin**
Run where?!
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[04:07] G**
I-It's over...
**[04:09] G**
HQ has commenced its attack on Earth!
**[04:15] Y**
If that were actually the Flame of
Kagutsuchi, we would be space dust already.
**[04:21] Y**
It's more likely that was a ship
that got too close to Earth
**[04:25] Y**
and ended up devoured
by the nanomachine virus.
**[04:28] Y**
So, Gengai,
**[04:30] Y**
how are the contents of this box used?
**[04:32] Gen**
In that box are nanomachines that are the
only things capable of destroying the bees.
**[04:38] Gen**
But the machines that can launch
them are unusable right now,
**[04:43] Gen**
so we'll need a ton of explosives to do it.
**[04:46] Gen**
We'll gradually spread the nanomachines
using multiple explosions.
**[04:50] Gen**
It'll take time,
**[04:51] Gen**
but that's the only way.
**[04:55] Y**
All that said,
**[04:57] Y**
I'm amazed you made up your mind to help us.
**[05:00] Gen**
Stopping the bees and getting overrun
is better than having Earth destroyed.
**[05:05] Gen**
At least it gives us a fighting chance.
**[05:07] Gen**
On top of that, you guys say
you'll take that prince's head...
**[05:12] Y**
Really? I don't recall guaranteeing
anything of the sort.
**[05:17] Y**
Gengai, I know torturing you is pointless.
**[05:22] Y**
That's because you're more
afraid of defeat than death.
**[05:27] Y**
But you people lost.
**[05:29] Y**
So it doesn't matter anymore
if you die, right?
**[05:33] Gen**
You're wrong there.
I really can't stand pain.
**[05:39] Gen**
All it would've taken is a kick up my
backside for me to help you like this.
**[05:43] Gen**
But of course, I'm talking about helping
you gather explosives, not destroy the bees.
**[05:49] Gen**
Those things explode easily if
they're raised to body temperature.
**[05:53] Y**
You little...
**[06:00] Gen**
Ow! Kagura?!
**[06:03] Y**
It seems I played right into your hands.
**[06:10] Kag**
Old Man Gengai!
**[06:11] Y**
Why is a Yato here?
**[06:14] Y**
You can't be on their side, surely?
**[06:17] Y**
How amusing.
**[06:20] Y**
I didn't expect to find one of my own
trying to commit suicide with this planet.
**[06:25] Kag**
Stop this stupid war already.
**[06:28] Kag**
If Earth blows up, you'll all die with it!
**[06:35] Kag**
No matter how much you hurt
yourself to save the Earthlings,
**[06:41] Kag**
as a Yato, you no longer have a place here.
**[06:44] Kag**
Cast aside by both Earthlings and brethren,
**[06:48] Kag**
you will die all alone in space.
**[06:56] G**
Huh?
**[07:04] G**
Y-You bastard!
**[07:16] Kam**
Oh, she has brethren right here.
**[07:19] Kam**
"Let's go home to that planet one day."
**[07:21] Kam**
It wasn't just one idiot
who made that promise.
**[07:28] Kam**
There's another idiot
**[07:31] Kam**
right here.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Rabbits Leap Higher on Moonlit Nights
**[07:45] Kam**
Oh, she has brethren right here.
**[07:47] Kam**
"Let's go home to that planet one day."
**[07:50] Kam**
It wasn't just one idiot
who made that promise.
**[07:54] Kam**
There's another idiot
**[07:57] Kam**
right here.
**[07:59] Kag**
Kamui...?
**[08:02] Abu**
And the pitiful subordinates who have to
go along with that idiot are here, too.
**[08:11] Abu**
This little bunny is our brethren.
**[08:14] Abu**
If you want a fight, the 7th
Division will gladly take you on.
**[08:19] Y**
The Harusame's Yato unit?
**[08:22] Y**
What are the remnants of that
dead pirate fleet doing here?
**[08:26] Kam**
Dead?
**[08:28] Kam**
Pirates will never die.
**[08:31] Kam**
Any time order comes into being,
it will always be accompanied by chaos.
**[08:36] Kam**
Any time a power tries to unify the universe,
**[08:39] Kam**
there will always be a
rebel power to counter it.
**[08:43] G**
Attacks from starboard!
**[08:45] G**
Prince, this is...
**[08:47] Kam**
If you guys try to destroy this planet,
**[08:52] Kam**
we will do the opposite.
**[08:54] Kam**
Only if we go crazy fighting the entire
universe to save this puny Earth
**[09:02] Kam**
can we call ourselves pirates.
**[09:05] Tak**
You sure kept us waiting.
**[09:07] Bat**
We had a little disagreement on tactics.
**[09:09] Bat**
What kind of idiots would send their
general to a planet that could vanish?
**[09:14] Sh**
That guy's even more hardheaded than me.
**[09:16] Sh**
No way to stop him.
**[09:18] Sh**
I bet there are worse enemies than
the Liberation Army waiting on Earth.
**[09:23] Tak**
Yeah. The Liberation
Army's just an appetizer.
**[09:26] Sh**
*Damn! I really should've gone with him!*
**[09:30] Bat**
Both situations are equally perilous.
**[09:33] Bat**
He gave us such a massive stage to
shine. What more could we ask for?
**[09:37] Sho**
Sure, I've gotten up to my fair
share of mischief over my life,
**[09:40] Sho**
but even I haven't done
anything this lawless.
**[09:45] Sho**
Any villain worth his salt has gotta go
for world conquest at least once!
**[09:51] Kam**
I'll leave things up in space to them.
**[09:53] Kam**
Unfortunately, I have more sense than you.
**[09:57] Kam**
I know that crushing you
guys won't change a thing.
**[10:01] Kam**
I know the real enemy...
**[10:03] Kam**
And I know this won't end
unless that man is crushed.
**[10:06] Kam**
So get up already.
**[10:09] Kam**
Are you gonna take this lying down?
**[10:12] Kam**
I'll make my stand.
**[10:14] Kam**
I'll crush Utsuro, who stole the
title of strongest from that baldy.
**[10:19] Kam**
And I'll also crush my kid sister, who
dredged up my weakness and ran with the win.
**[10:24] Kam**
No matter how many times I fall, I won't
be defeated as long as I get back up.
**[10:28] Kam**
Weren't you the one who taught me that's
what it means to be the strongest?
**[10:33] Kag**
Jeez...
**[10:35] Kag**
I thought you would've learned your
lesson after being beaten to a pulp,
**[10:39] Kag**
but it looks like your stupidity is incurable.
**[10:45] Kam**
He said the same thing to me.
**[10:47] Kam**
But even so,
**[10:49] Kam**
he sent me here without argument.
**[10:52] Kam**
I wonder why.
**[10:54] Kag**
Isn't that obvious?
**[10:55] Kag**
Because he knows that I'd never lose to you,
**[10:58] Kag**
and that you'd never lose to
anyone other than me right now.
**[11:04] Kag**
An unbeatable big bro and an unbeatable
kid sister are invincible together.
**[11:09] Kag**
That's what he believes.
**[11:11] Kam**
I guess I can live up to his expectations...
**[11:14] Kam**
If you don't hold me back, that is.
**[11:16] Kam**
As long as this planet is fine,
I can kill you anytime, anyway.
**[11:20] Kag**
Right back at you.
**[11:22] Y**
Now that we can't use the geezer,
**[11:24] Y**
there is only one way for
us to leave here alive:
**[11:29] Y**
by felling this nation before dawn.
**[11:32] Y**
It'll be a tad troublesome if we
have to fight Yato along the way,
**[11:35] Y**
but your blood, stagnant
and corrupted by evil,
**[11:39] Y**
is no longer Yato blood.
**[11:52] Y**
Let me show you what a real Yato is like!
**[11:58] G**
H-He turned young again?!
**[12:00] Abu**
Wait, I've heard of this before.
**[12:02] Abu**
A legendary mercenary known as the
elder who, with his qigong mastery,
**[12:07] Abu**
can freely asphyxiate or revitalize
himself to control his lifespan
**[12:12] Abu**
and has kept fighting for two
centuries as a true monster.
**[12:22] Kam**
Gramps... You know that Yato
blood coursing through your veins?
**[12:27] Kam**
I don't know how many centuries
old or vintage it is,
**[12:31] Kam**
but coursing through ours
**[12:32] Kam**
is the blood of one who spent thousands of
years watching over that planet and us,
**[12:37] Kam**
the blood of our mother.
**[12:41] Kam**
Let us show you what a real Yato is like!
**[12:54] Abu**
What?
**[12:58] Abu**
That guy...
**[12:59] Abu**
Can he resize his body at will?
**[13:09] Kag**
Oops.
**[13:10] Kag**
Sorry.
**[13:13] Kam**
Don't worry about it.
**[13:14] Kam**
Now we're even!
**[13:18] Abu**
What're you moronic siblings doing?
**[13:25] Kag**
Why, you little!
**[13:27] Kag**
Who goes that far when I
said it wasn't on purpose?!
**[13:31] Kam**
I warned you not to hold me back, didn't I?
**[13:34] Kam**
Even a guaranteed win isn't
guaranteed with you around.
**[13:36] Kam**
Either piss off or die. Make your choice.
**[13:38] Kag**
You don't get to mouth off at me when
you couldn't dodge that simple kick.
**[13:41] Kag**
*You* die!
**[13:42] Abu**
This is no time to be
fighting among yourselves!
**[13:48] Y**
I see having a bloodline too old
brings its own set of problems.
**[13:52] Y**
Yours is obviously all moldy.
**[13:55] Kam**
Right, I totally forgot.
**[13:58] Kam**
You inherited that baldy's blood, too.
**[14:01] Kam**
No wonder you're holding me back.
**[14:02] Kag**
You're definitely going
bald in the future, too!
**[14:05] Kag**
Make sure you have a wig ready!
**[14:07] Y**
Pointless.
**[14:09] Y**
Such disjointed attacks...
**[14:11] Abu**
Where are you two even aiming?!
**[14:14] Abu**
Don't enjoy a fun sibling spat
with the enemy in the middle!
**[14:20] Kam**
Looks like you can't see the enemy too well.
**[14:23] Kag**
Right back at you!
**[14:25] Kam**
If you keep relying on your eyes,
**[14:28] Kam**
you can't grasp all of the enemy.
**[14:31] Kam**
That is why we Yato use our
blood to gaze upon our enemies.
**[14:34] Kam**
The memories of battle that've
accumulated in our blood for ages
**[14:39] Kam**
and our own personal experiences
**[14:40] Kam**
come together to give us Yato an almost
instinctive eye to size our enemies up with.
**[14:46] Kam**
As someone who's always fought her enemies
and herself, you should be able to see...
**[14:51] Kam**
More things than you could ever see before.
**[14:55] Kam**
Right now, you're fully capable of taming it.
**[14:59] Kam**
Don't fear your blood.
**[15:01] Kam**
Have some faith in our family's blood.
**[15:05] Kag**
*Use not my eyes, but my blood.*
**[15:09] Kam**
See anything?
**[15:11] Kag**
Nothing yet.
**[15:13] Kam**
Figures.
**[15:15] Kam**
I see it very well.
**[15:17] Kag**
See what?
**[15:17] Kam**
The enemy's face.
**[15:19] Kam**
You got one more hit in.
**[15:21] Kam**
This makes us even.
**[15:23] Kag**
You punk!
**[15:27] Y**
One who lets others distract them
from the enemy can never prevail!
**[15:32] Kag**
*No way, did he...*
**[15:39] Y**
You're playing the decoy?
**[15:42] Y**
I can see right through you!
**[15:47] Kag**
I see now! The first hit was an accident!
**[15:50] Kag**
It doesn't count!
**[15:52] Kag**
So now...
**[15:54] Kag**
We're even!
**[15:56] Abu**
You're still at it?!
**[15:59] Kag**
Oh, no! My leg slipped!
**[16:01] Kag**
Dodge it, Big Bro!
**[16:03] Y**
Just how much will you insult me...
**[16:04] Kam**
Oh?
**[16:06] Kam**
An accidental hit doesn't count?
**[16:09] Kam**
Hup.
**[16:13] Kam**
Oh, sorry. I didn't notice you above me.
**[16:16] Y**
*I-I can't read their movements at all...*
**[16:18] Kag**
You're the big bro! Be the bigger man!
**[16:20] Kag**
Let your kid sister get the last hit in!
**[16:24] Y**
* They're hitting me right on the bull's-eye*
* while fighting among themselves!*
**[16:27] Kam**
Why can't you be modest
and let your brother win?
**[16:31] Y**
*No, this spat is a fake-out.*
**[16:34] Y**
* Are they waiting for me to focus*
* on defending my bull's-eye?*
**[16:37] Y**
* Are they telling me to choose*
* between my life and my balls?*
**[16:42] Y**
I'll let you have both!
**[16:45] Y**
I'll defend my entire body by focusing
all my defense on my bull's-eye!
**[16:48] Y**
I have no blind spots now!
**[16:55] Kam**
No more going around in circles.
**[16:57] Kag**
We should just go at each other directly.
**[16:59] Kam**
But before that...
**[17:02] Kam**
If you can harden and soften at will...
**[17:03] Kag**
...we'll just take both
your hard and soft spots...
**[17:06] Bo**
...and trample them all!
**[17:17] Y**
What your eyes gaze upon
**[17:21] Y**
is neither the enemy in front of
you nor the sibling by your side,
**[17:26] Y**
but what lies beyond?
**[17:28] Y**
The faraway concept of strength?
**[17:32] Y**
Rejoice, my brethren!
**[17:35] Y**
The noble blood of us Yato hasn't died yet...
**[17:40] G**
Elder!
**[17:41] G**
The legend of the battlefield
was killed by those brats?!
**[17:45] Kag**
What're you looking at to confirm his death?
**[17:47] Kam**
Rest assured.
**[17:49] Kam**
The geezer just acted
his age and withered up.
**[17:51] Kag**
Quit with that metaphor.
**[17:53] Kam**
Grab your dead tree and get lost already.
**[17:55] G**
Curse you!
**[17:57] Kam**
Those who cling to a legend,
**[17:59] Kam**
and those who try to create their own legend.
**[18:03] Kam**
We are two different races, and
you'll find that out very quickly.
**[18:07] Abu**
All right! Hear that, you louts?
**[18:10] Abu**
Looks like our commander has
gained some sympathy for us.
**[18:13] G**
The commander is the one who needs sympathy!
**[18:16] G**
Did you catch a cold on some planet, boss?
**[18:19] Kam**
Nothing has changed.
**[18:21] Kam**
I still want nothing to do with weaklings.
**[18:24] Kam**
I just want to get around to
fighting my real target already.
**[18:27] Kag**
I don't mind. I'll just have
one more scrub to beat up.
**[18:31] Kam**
Who said you were my real target?
**[18:33] Kam**
You're one of the scrubs, too!
**[18:38] Gin**
Hey. I'm glad to see you two have made up.
**[18:42] Gin**
That said, if you wanna settle
scores, aren't I first in line, kid?
**[18:47] Oki**
Nah. I remember him trying
to seduce me as well.
**[18:51] Oki**
I'm not letting anyone else
have him. Not even you, boss.
**[18:55] Kag**
Gin-chan! You guys!
**[18:58] Kag**
After going around setting up rematch
flags with anyone and everyone,
**[19:02] Kag**
I hope you're not expecting to have a
happy ending with your main target alone.
**[19:05] Oki**
The only ending you deserve
**[19:08] Oki**
is a bad ending where you get skewered
by heroines from all directions, Manaka.
**[19:13] Hij**
There's something I'd never
hear in Manaka's voice.
**[19:16] Kam**
I only went at it with you
guys once. Talk about clingy.
**[19:20] Kam**
You seemed easy, but I guess
you were surprisingly pure.
**[19:23] Kag**
Quit being misleading!
**[19:26] Kam**
No need to worry.
**[19:28] Kam**
Unlike your average harem rom-com protags,
**[19:31] Kam**
I'm not shallow enough to plant my
seeds and not take responsibility.
**[19:36] Kam**
I'll make sure to kill every last heroine!
**[19:40] Kam**
So for now, I'll endure it!
**[19:44] Kam**
I won't let any of you die until I kill you!
**[19:54] Abu**
"Don't let anyone die," huh?
**[19:56] Abu**
I never thought I'd see the day
when I received such an order.
**[20:00] Abu**
Hey, retreat now and let your allies know.
**[20:04] Abu**
The universe's craziest big bro and the
universe's stupidest big bro have teamed up.
**[20:09] Abu**
Nobody can stop those siblings anymore.
**[20:13] Abu**
If you don't want to die with
Earth, pray to the heavens.
**[20:17] Abu**
We'll handle the rest.
**[20:20] Abu**
Also, beware of colds.
**[20:23] Abu**
If you catch his, you'll have trouble.
**[20:26] G**
Retreat! Let's regroup!
**[20:28] G**
But...
**[20:29] G**
Just do it—
**[20:34] G**
H-Hey!
**[20:41] Shin**
Is that... Naraku?
**[20:43] Shin**
Wh-Why are they here?
**[20:55] Gin**
Utsuro!
**[20:56] Uts**
Thanks to you all, I've managed
to make this war a real messy one.
**[21:08] Uts**
I thank you for your foolishness.
**[21:13] Uts**
Now...
**[21:14] Uts**
An ending ought to be beautiful and tranquil.
**[21:19] Uts**
The planet's ending
**[21:22] Uts**
has no place for you all.
**[21:26] G**
O-Oh, God...
**[21:30] Uts**
Didn't you find it strange?
**[21:33] Uts**
I've destroyed the ley lines and
Altana gates of so many planets,
**[21:36] Uts**
so why wasn't I doing the same to Earth?
**[21:40] Uts**
Was I showing mercy to my homeland?
**[21:43] Uts**
Was it just out of a whim?
**[21:52] Uts**
No.
**[21:54] Uts**
I saved it for a special moment...
**[21:56] Uts**
For you all.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:39] Hen**
I'm prepared to stop the enemy even if
this unit turns to ash in the process.
**[23:45] Hen**
I'll fight alongside you all
until the very end, too.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:48] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama...
***SIGN*** Making a Dull World Interesting
***SIGN*** In space, it's the Flame of Kagutsuchi.
***SIGN*** On Earth, it's the Altana going berserk.
***SIGN*** Everywhere you look, it's a desperate situation.
***SIGN*** What tune does the Kiheitai's Kawakami Bansai play at this time?
# 356 - Making a Dull World Interesting
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!
**[00:12] U**
Didn't you find it strange?
**[00:15] U**
I've destroyed the ley lines and
Altana gates of so many planets,
**[00:19] U**
so why wasn't I doing the same to Earth?
**[00:23] U**
Was I showing mercy to my homeland?
**[00:26] U**
Was it just out of a whim?
**[00:34] U**
No.
**[00:36] U**
I saved it for a special moment...
**[00:39] U**
For you all.
**[00:43] G**
Chief!
**[00:54] G**
Detecting a high-energy
reading on Earth's surface!
**[00:56] G**
What's going on?!
**[00:58] G**
This is almost like...
**[00:59] G**
A repeat of that time!
**[01:01] En**
Altana gone berserk?
**[01:04] G**
Only the Tendoshu could
cause something like this!
**[01:08] En**
*They're wrong.*
**[01:10] En**
*The Tendoshu are long gone already.*
**[01:13] En**
*Then who could it be?*
**[01:17] En**
*What if they're the same?*
**[01:20] En**
* What if the destruction*
* of our homeland and Earth*
**[01:25] En**
* were caused by the same person,*
* who's still down there?*
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[03:07] U**
Perhaps they, too, have noticed by now...
**[03:13] U**
Who their real enemy is.
**[03:19] U**
The long, long night will end soon.
**[03:22] U**
There is no need to feel sorrow.
**[03:25] U**
Nor is there a need to suffer.
**[03:36] U**
Because nothing will remain
to prove that you ever lived.
**[03:44] Gin**
But I'm gonna leave a mark, Utsuro.
**[03:47] Gin**
I'm gonna cling to this life so
hard, I'll leave bite marks!
**[03:56] Soy**
Katakuriko, will everyone...
will all of Edo's people be all right?
**[04:02] Mat**
Take the princess to a safe place.
**[04:04] Soy**
Katakuriko!
**[04:06] Nob**
Where, exactly, is this
"safe place" you speak of?
**[04:08] Nob**
Why not tell her the truth?
**[04:11] Nob**
Tell her that even the ground we stand
on right now could blow up at any time.
**[04:17] Nob**
I can understand wanting
everyone else to be safe,
**[04:21] Nob**
but being too greedy will only
bring you pain in the long run.
**[04:26] Mat**
Hmph! Did you have to be so blunt?
**[04:30] Mat**
The guys up there are fighting
with all they've got.
**[04:34] Mat**
What is it that we can do right now?
**[04:39] (Flashback) Kag**
Sadaharu.
**[04:42] (Flashback) Kag**
Take care of Nobutas and Soyo-chan, okay?
**[04:46] (Flashback) Kag**
No!
**[04:47] (Flashback) Kag**
There has to be something only you can do.
**[04:52] (Flashback) Kag**
Doesn't matter what it is.
**[04:54] (Flashback) Kag**
We all have to do what only
we can, the best we can.
**[04:58] (Flashback) Kag**
When those things add up,
**[05:01] (Flashback) Kag**
we can save anything, even Earth.
**[05:05] (Flashback) Kag**
Isn't that right, Sadaharu?
**[05:13] Mat**
The Altana went out of control?
**[05:15] Mat**
What's that mean, Senpai?
**[05:18] Hen**
They're trying to fire that massive amount
of energy at the Flame of Kagutsuchi.
**[05:24] Hen**
If they do,
**[05:26] Hen**
even this galaxy could be in danger.
**[05:30] Mat**
On top of stopping the Flame of Kagutsuchi...
**[05:33] Ban**
...we must also stop the
Altana from rampaging?
**[05:41] G**
What?
**[05:56] [SONG] Sign**
Unauthorized Call
**[05:58] G**
*Yo! You still alive, Kiheitai guys?!*
**[06:04] G**
Sorry to keep ya waiting.
**[06:06] G**
Now all the villains are in one place.
**[06:11] G**
Ain't that right, Liberation Army of Justice?
**[06:17] Bat**
Shokaku.
**[06:18] Bat**
Do your job before you run
off to go play pirate.
**[06:22] Sho**
For a pirate, you sure
do take work seriously!
**[06:27] Sho**
* I'm sorry to say I can't*
* stand that other guy.*
**[06:30] Sho**
*I'll leave him to you.*
**[06:35] Bat**
I'm not your leader, you idiots.
**[06:38] Bat**
I'm not babysitting a monkey,
**[06:40] Bat**
much less escorting a freak
who doesn't even have a body.
**[06:44] Bat**
Hear that, Hankai?
**[06:46] Han**
* Bato... It was Earthlings*
* who took my body from me.*
**[06:52] Han**
* And you ask me to help them?*
* Help my mortal enemies?*
**[06:58] Hen**
Precisely.
**[07:00] Hen**
You're capable of infiltrating
the ship's system
**[07:02] Hen**
and controlling the Flame of
Kagutsuchi from the inside.
**[07:07] Han**
* I've seen several signs of*
* attempted break-ins already.*
**[07:11] Han**
* But they've all been repelled*
* by the security system.*
**[07:16] Han**
* I suppose that's as far*
* as Earthlings can go.*
**[07:19] Hen**
Well, yes, given this is the thirteenth
time I'm giving you this speech.
**[07:26] Hen**
Thanks to the twelve copies of you
that my friends have released,
**[07:31] Hen**
the firewall is gradually
starting to come undone.
**[07:35] Hen**
Your mortal enemy is that very ship.
**[07:39] Hen**
Twelve of you have fallen on
this quest. Avenge their deaths.
**[07:46] G**
All of Earth's energy is
gathering in one place.
**[07:50] G**
P-Prince...
**[07:52] En**
Cut off energy supply to everything
but the vital systems.
**[07:57] En**
Reroute it all to the Flame of
Kagutsuchi's charging process
**[08:01] En**
and accelerate its firing.
**[08:02] G**
B-But, Prince, many of our men are still
engaging the enemy all over the place!
**[08:14] Bat**
Hey, how many more copies will
we need to destroy that weapon?
**[08:20] Hen**
No amount is enough.
**[08:22] Hen**
The security system has countless
firewalls layered upon each other.
**[08:27] Hen**
But no matter how many
walls stand in our way,
**[08:31] Hen**
they can surely overcome them all.
**[08:36] Sho**
I've got the headbutts to
take out any enemy I can see.
**[08:41] Bat**
So my job is to escort after all?
**[08:44] Bat**
That said,
**[08:45] Bat**
* piloting us all to hell*
* doesn't sound too bad.*
**[08:49] Hen**
Shokaku-san, Bato-san.
**[08:52] Hen**
* When it comes down to it,*
* you're both hard workers, huh?*
**[09:04] Bat**
I can't see a thing.
**[09:09] Sho**
Bato.
**[09:10] Sho**
Hey, what's wrong?
**[09:12] Sho**
Bato?
***SIGN*** Call One Call Two
**[09:17] Hen**
Shokaku-san!
**[09:18] Hen**
Bato-san!
**[09:21] Hen**
Don't tell me...
**[09:22] En**
Destroy all sectors with
enemies inside at once.
**[09:26] Hen**
Run away!
**[09:38] G**
Wh-What have they done?
**[09:43] Hen**
Hankai-dono.
**[09:48] Hen**
How long until the Flame of
Kagutsuchi is fired now?
**[09:53] Han**
*Around fifteen minutes, I'd say.*
**[09:56] Hen**
Is there a way to stall it?
**[09:59] Han**
* Link up with those outside and have*
* them destroy the energy circuits.*
**[10:03] Han**
* But even that will only*
* provide a brief respite.*
**[10:08] G**
T-Takechi-sama!
**[10:09] G**
The Liberation Army's entire
fleet is headed this way!
**[10:16] En**
Fifteen minutes will do. Keep the
enemy pinned down for that long,
**[10:21] En**
and it'll be over. All of it.
**[10:27] Tak**
*Takechi, do you hear me?*
**[10:30] Tak**
We've been separated from the unit.
**[10:32] Tak**
Regrouping will be difficult.
**[10:34] Tak**
So we're going to go ahead
and charge onto the bridge.
**[10:37] Hen**
*Shinsuke-dono.*
**[10:39] Hen**
* Only fifteen minutes remain before*
* the Flame of Kagutsuchi fires.*
**[10:44] Hen**
However, I'll extend that to thirty.
**[10:49] Hen**
In that time, destroy the energy circuits.
**[10:53] Hen**
Can you get me a small ship?
**[10:56] Mat**
*What are you thinking, Takechi-senpai?*
**[11:00] Mat**
*Senpai!*
**[11:06] (Flashback) Tak**
Why won't you draw your sword?
**[11:09] (Flashback) Hen**
Because I know...
**[11:11] (Flashback) Hen**
That we could turn the world on
its head, but we could never
**[11:17] (Flashback) Hen**
defeat you, Takasugi Shinsuke.
**[11:21] (Flashback) Tak**
It seems you're smarter than these
bodies on the ground, at least.
**[11:26] (Flashback) Tak**
But then, why did you come here?
**[11:28] (Flashback) Hen**
They have misused their authority and
oppressed anyone they didn't like.
**[11:35] (Flashback) Hen**
*They* were criminals who had to be
brought to justice. That's why.
**[11:39] (Flashback) Hen**
If you don't like how I used
you, go ahead and kill me.
**[11:44] (Flashback) Hen**
I've gone and learned that this
world is hopelessly boring.
**[11:54] (Flashback) Tak**
If this act of yours was based on your
judgment of my character, I'm impressed.
**[12:00] (Flashback) Tak**
I almost want you as a strategist.
**[12:03] (Flashback) Hen**
P-Please wait!
**[12:05] (Flashback) Tak**
You're not wise or anything.
**[12:08] (Flashback) Tak**
Just quick to give up.
**[12:10] (Flashback) Tak**
If you keep running around
pretending to be smart,
**[12:13] (Flashback) Tak**
you're running away from the unexpected.
**[12:16] (Flashback) Hen**
You mean to say this country can
be defeated if I keep fighting?
**[12:22] (Flashback) Tak**
Beats me. But in order to
live in this dull-ass world,
**[12:26] (Flashback) Tak**
you've got to believe in a miracle or two.
**[12:36] Hen**
I trust you're aware of our objective.
**[12:39] Hen**
Just fifteen minutes.
**[12:41] Hen**
That might not be just reward
for a do-or-die mission.
**[12:46] Hen**
But within those fifteen minutes
lies a chance to cause a miracle.
**[12:51] Hen**
Please, give me the last
fifteen minutes of your lives!
**[13:12] (Flashback) Tak**
If you're going to be killed
by the country anyway,
**[13:15] (Flashback) Tak**
why not die for me, Manslayer Bansai?
**[13:20] (Flashback) Ban**
Let me ask you: what will you die for?
**[13:25] (Flashback) Tak**
I won't die.
**[13:27] (Flashback) Tak**
No matter how many corpses I have to
walk over, until I trample this country,
**[13:32] (Flashback) Tak**
I refuse to die.
**[13:49] Tak**
That must be the Flame of
Kagutsuchi's central command.
**[13:53] Ban**
Run!
**[13:55] Ban**
No matter how many corpses
you have to walk over,
**[13:58] Ban**
you won't die until you fulfill your goal.
**[14:00] Ban**
You're the one who said that.
**[14:05] Ban**
Run, Shinsuke.
**[14:09] Mat**
What are you saying, Senpai?!
**[14:14] Ban**
Worry not.
**[14:17] Ban**
I'll fight alongside you all
until the very end, too.
**[14:21] G**
Fire!
**[14:25] G**
What's the matter?
**[14:29] Ban**
Dance for me.
**[14:34] G**
K-Kill them!
**[14:47] Ban**
*Heroes are such sinful beings.*
**[14:52] Ban**
*They never look back*
**[14:54] Ban**
*and charge straight forward.*
**[14:58] Ban**
* That is why people can chase after*
* their backs and move forward.*
**[15:05] Ban**
*But I understand*
**[15:09] Ban**
* that you knew the pain and sorrow of*
* walking over a corpse more than anyone,*
**[15:16] Ban**
* but you still had to grit your*
* teeth and keep moving forward.*
**[15:21] Ban**
*I understand that you're just one weak man.*
**[15:27] Ban**
*But even so...*
**[15:35] Ban**
Don't look back!
**[15:37] Ban**
Don't look back...
**[15:39] Ban**
Keep your eyes forward, Shinsuke!
**[15:44] G**
Fire!
**[16:02] Ban**
* Shinsuke, it isn't yet time*
* for you to look back.*
**[16:07] Ban**
* This world can't afford*
* to lose you just yet.*
**[16:14] Mat**
Bansai-senpai!
**[16:24] Ban**
*Get going, Shinsuke.*
**[16:25] Ban**
*I promise to catch up later.*
**[16:28] Tak**
Bansai...
**[16:29] Ban**
*Worry not.*
**[16:31] Ban**
*Isn't this how we have always been?*
**[16:34] Ban**
* The Kiheitai is a group that's*
* constantly chasing after your back!*
**[16:43] Ban**
No matter where you are,
**[16:46] Ban**
I will catch up for sure.
**[16:50] G**
The Flame of Kagutsuchi's energy
is over 85 percent charged!
**[16:54] G**
Five minutes to fire!
**[16:57] En**
They're finally ending, huh?
**[16:59] En**
Both our crusade
**[17:01] En**
and that planet?
**[17:06] G**
Detecting irregularity in
the energy supply system!
**[17:09] G**
It's not responding!
**[17:11] G**
Did we route too much energy through it?
**[17:13] G**
No, this is...
**[17:16] Han**
*The stage is set.*
**[17:18] Han**
*But you might have a hard time getting here.*
**[17:22] Hen**
I'm perfectly aware.
**[17:24] Hen**
Even if this ship burns to ash, I'm prepared
to use that flame to stop the enemy.
**[17:31] En**
Ah, I see. One last exercise in futility, eh?
**[17:43] G**
No way...
**[18:38] Ban**
Took you long enough.
***SIGN*** Clear Nose
**[18:46] Ban**
Or perhaps I was the one who made you wait.
**[18:51] Ban**
We walked over your corpses to get here.
**[18:58] Ban**
So if you're here to pick me up,
I can't exactly shoo you away.
**[19:10] Ni**
I didn't come to pick you up,
nor was I waiting for you.
**[19:15] Ni**
We chase after that man
until our bodies burn out.
**[19:20] Ni**
Isn't that who we Kiheitai are?
**[19:29] G**
H-He's still trying to stand?
**[19:31] G**
What more can he do all alone?
**[19:36] Ban**
I'm not alone.
**[19:38] Ban**
* Shinsuke, the Kiheitai*
* live on alongside you.*
**[19:43] G**
Fire!
**[19:59] G**
Two minutes until the Flame
of Kagutsuchi can be fired!
**[20:09] G**
We're through!
**[20:12] G**
Now we just have to destroy that equipment!
**[20:23] Hen**
It seems the ship couldn't handle it.
**[20:28] G**
We still have ammunition.
**[20:30] G**
One last shot!
**[20:44] G**
Cease fire!
**[20:53] G**
He's still standing after
all that concentrated fire?
**[20:56] G**
No, that man is already...
**[21:09] G**
Why did he do this?
**[21:18] Ban**
*Shinsuke...*
**[21:24] Hen**
*Make a miracle happen.*
**[21:28] G**
One minute until Flame of Kagutsuchi fires!
**[21:39] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama...
**[21:50] G**
What happened?
**[21:51] G**
The squad engaging the
enemy has been wiped out!
**[21:54] G**
Put out the fire at once!
Fortify Gate Three's defenses!
**[21:58] G**
Don't let anyone near the control unit!
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Making a Dull World Interesting
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:50] Tak**
No need to let them know.
***SIGN*** Do Something Uncharacteristic,
and Something Uncharacteristic Will Happen
***SIGN*** Cruelty reigns on the battlefield,
***SIGN*** with one tragedy after another.
***SIGN*** Wring out every last ounce of energy
***SIGN*** to put an end to it all!
# 357 - Do Something Uncharacteristic, and Something Uncharacteristic Will Happen
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!
**[00:08] (Flashback) Wen**
But what's wrong with that?
**[00:11] (Flashback) Wen**
I want to live with that pain,
**[00:16] (Flashback) Wen**
because it's proof that he
still lives on inside me.
**[00:23] (Flashback) Wen**
But I've only come to feel this way
because you and this child are with me.
**[00:30] (Flashback) Wen**
So, Ensho,
**[00:32] (Flashback) Wen**
don't you die in battle and leave me behind.
**[00:36] (Flashback) Wen**
You must live longer than
me and cry when I die.
**[00:46] En**
*That was the last time I spoke with her.*
**[00:51] En**
* She said she would continue*
* to live with the pain,*
**[00:58] En**
* completely oblivious to what caused*
* that pain in the first place...*
**[01:05] (Flashback) EnB**
Welcome back, Gunpowder Prince.
**[01:07] (Flashback) EnB**
Or, well, my admirable little brother.
**[01:12] (Flashback) EnB**
You are truly the guardian spirit
defending Burei's peace!
**[01:20] En**
* And completely oblivious*
* to my feelings for her.*
**[01:30] (Flashback) EnB**
Don't worry.
**[01:32] (Flashback) EnB**
The purpose of this trip is to sign a
treaty. Nothing dangerous will happen.
**[01:37] (Flashback) Wen**
Right...
**[01:43] (Flashback) EnB**
Besides, I have the Gunpowder Prince with me.
**[01:52] (Flashback) EnB**
What? The offer of a
treaty was just a trap?!
**[01:57] (Flashback) EnB**
Ensho! We're surrounded by the enemy!
**[01:59] (Flashback) EnB**
Send backup at once!
**[02:02] (Flashback) EnB**
Ensho?
**[02:04] (Flashback) EnB**
Ensho!
**[02:23] En**
* I never had the right to*
* resent someone over her...*
**[02:31] En**
*because I was the object of her vengeance.*
**[02:41] En**
*I wasn't heading courageously into battle,*
**[02:47] En**
*but simply running away the entire time.*
**[02:50] En**
*She had the strength to fight her suffering,*
**[02:53] En**
* and my weakness caused me*
* to keep running from her.*
**[02:57] En**
* Only when I was on the precipice between*
* life and death could I forget that.*
**[03:03] En**
* Only then could I forget the grief of*
* being powerless to prevent her loss.*
**[03:16] En**
*And so, even now,*
**[03:19] En**
*I continue to run.*
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Do Something Uncharacteristic,
and Something Uncharacteristic Will Happen
**[05:04] G**
What happened?
**[05:05] G**
The squad engaging the
enemy has been wiped out!
**[05:08] G**
Put out the fire at once!
Fortify Gate Three's defenses!
**[05:12] G**
Don't let anyone near the control unit!
**[05:33] G**
The energy supply system has been damaged!
**[05:36] G**
Energy circuits all over
the ship are going down!
**[05:40] G**
The flow of energy to the Flame of
Kagutsuchi has completely stopped!
**[05:44] G**
Its emergency system is
shifting it to hibernation mode!
**[05:48] En**
What happened to the enemies trying
to stop the Flame of Kagutsuchi?
**[05:52] G**
Currently, our comms are in disarray, too.
**[05:55] G**
We cannot confirm anything!
**[05:57] G**
Restarting the Flame of Kagutsuchi
will likely take fifteen minutes!
**[06:02] En**
They threw their lives away
to keep their hopes alive,
**[06:05] En**
but how frail they are.
**[06:07] G**
Monitors coming back online.
**[06:13] G**
Th-This is...
**[06:15] G**
What happened?
**[06:21] Sak**
We put all our hopes
**[06:23] Sak**
into these things right here.
**[06:26] Sak**
Have a taste!
**[06:34] G**
Prince!
**[06:39] G**
No way...
**[06:41] G**
They're still alive?
**[06:43] Kat**
We are, and we aren't missing anyone.
**[06:47] Kat**
The souls of those who died and
entrusted us with their hopes
**[06:51] Kat**
are also here with us!
**[06:53] Kat**
We shall fight together, win together,
**[06:56] Kat**
and return together...
**[06:58] Kat**
To our home, Earth!
**[07:08] Tak**
* How many more corpses must*
* I walk over to reach my goal?*
**[07:14] Tak**
*What, exactly, will I find when I get there?*
**[07:18] Tak**
*I no longer...*
**[07:25] Tak**
*have anything to call my own.*
**[07:39] Tak**
*So, at the very least, let me shed*
**[07:44] Tak**
*my blood.*
**[07:47] Tak**
* My sword will only break atop*
* the mountain of your corpses.*
**[07:53] Tak**
* That, and only that,*
* is my final destination.*
**[08:07] G**
The Heavenly Bird...
**[08:10] G**
The Flame of Kagutsuchi's control
unit has been destroyed!
**[08:14] G**
The energy it was charged
with is going out of control
**[08:17] G**
and flowing back out into the ship!
**[08:18] G**
It's causing explosions all over the ship!
**[08:21] G**
We must take measures at once
**[08:23] G**
or this ship will sink!
**[08:25] Kat**
So they did it.
**[08:27] Sak**
But lookin' at this, they
musta paid a heavy price.
**[08:32] Sak**
Put your weapons down and surrender.
**[08:34] Sak**
This bridge is already under our control.
**[08:37] Sak**
You have lost.
**[08:39] Sak**
Of course, if you wanna keep fightin',
**[08:44] Sak**
that's just fine.
**[08:46] Sak**
Until this ship sinks, we'll kill
as many of you as we can.
**[08:52] Sak**
Do you get it? I'm no different from you lot.
**[08:56] Sak**
We all feel the same way.
**[09:02] En**
That's some splendid resolve.
**[09:05] En**
I, too, was told that
I couldn't die just yet.
**[09:11] En**
That I had to burn down
every last one of you.
**[09:23] En**
Oh?
**[09:27] En**
You had a woman save your life, too, huh?
**[09:36] Sak**
Mutsu!
**[09:38] G**
You fiend!
**[09:57] G**
Take cover!
**[10:36] En**
The war is only just beginning.
**[10:39] En**
The flame that couldn't be unleashed
**[10:41] En**
is still burning strong on this ship.
**[10:45] En**
Then all we need to do is crash
this ship into that planet.
**[10:49] Shi**
Ensho!
**[10:51] Shi**
You still refuse to stop fighting?
**[10:54] Shi**
What do you think will remain once
you've burned everything down?!
**[10:58] En**
That isn't for us to decide.
**[11:02] En**
We shall fight for all those we've lost
**[11:06] En**
until their souls rest in peace.
**[11:09] Shi**
Do you really think that's what your
dead comrades and your late wife want?!
**[11:34] Kat**
Oh, I'd love to see you try!
**[11:37] Sak**
That flame...
**[11:39] Bo**
...burns within us, too!
**[11:57] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama...
**[12:10] En**
You hate me, don't you?
**[12:20] En**
I took away your friends
and the ones you love.
**[12:25] En**
Even I hate myself.
**[12:27] En**
Having lost everything, my loved
ones and the objects of my hatred,
**[12:34] En**
all I can do is keep burning myself to ash!
**[13:22] Kat**
We haven't lost a thing.
**[13:28] Kat**
No matter how many times we lose
them or have them taken from us,
**[13:32] Kat**
we will keep loving people and hating them!
**[13:38] Mat**
My ride has arrived, huh?
**[13:41] Hen**
If that's what I was, I would've
let go of this aged hand of yours.
**[13:48] Hen**
The reason I'm not letting go
**[13:51] Hen**
is because I'm neither a ride nor a lolicon,
**[13:55] Hen**
just a feminist.
**[14:02] G**
Get ready to evacuate!
**[14:04] G**
Hurry up!
**[14:08] G**
P-Prince?
**[14:13] G**
D-Don't let those guys get any closer!
**[14:16] G**
If we let them in, we'll
go down with the ship!
**[14:21] Sho**
That so?
**[14:23] Sho**
We let ourselves in without knowing.
**[14:27] Sho**
Sorry about that.
**[14:54] Sho**
*The man stood there.*
**[14:58] Sho**
*With just that,*
**[15:01] Sho**
*the enemy's mood,*
**[15:04] Sho**
*the mood of our allies,*
**[15:08] Sho**
* and the mood of the battlefield*
* changed completely.*
**[15:15] Mat**
Senpai? How are you here?
**[15:18] Hen**
Trying to cause a miracle
**[15:20] Hen**
was uncharacteristic of me, and I guess
this was a hint never to try it again.
**[15:40] (Flashback) Sho**
Yo, Strategist.
**[15:42] (Flashback) Sho**
Being the kamikaze squad
sounds like a fun role.
**[15:45] (Flashback) Sho**
Can't let you hog it for yourself.
**[15:47] (Flashback) Hen**
Shokaku-san! I'm so glad you're alive!
**[15:50] (Flashback) Hen**
Did you do this, then?
**[15:52] (Flashback) Sho**
I tapped into your comms, learned your
plan, and destroyed the equipment first.
**[15:58] (Flashback) Sho**
A strategist must stay alive and use his
brains until the very end in order to win.
**[16:04] (Flashback) Hen**
Shokaku-san...
**[16:05] (Flashback) Sho**
I made a promise with that guy.
**[16:10] (Flashback) Sho**
The survivor would decorate the bones of
the one who died with the enemy's skulls.
**[16:17] (Flashback) Sho**
But I'm an idiot, you know?
**[16:20] (Flashback) Sho**
I don't know how to do that.
**[16:23] (Flashback) Sho**
I have no idea how to even avenge my friends.
**[16:28] (Flashback) Sho**
So please, use me.
**[16:32] (Flashback) Sho**
How can we win?
**[16:38] (Flashback) Sho**
What now?
**[16:39] (Flashback) Han**
The control unit has been destroyed.
**[16:42] (Flashback) Han**
But it hasn't stopped completely yet.
**[16:45] (Flashback) Han**
In which case...
**[16:47] (Flashback) Hen**
The enemy will try to evacuate before
crashing this ship into Earth!
**[16:52] (Flashback) Hen**
Let's gather up all the men we have!
**[16:55] (Flashback) Hen**
We will collect our remaining strength in
one place and throw it all at the enemy.
**[17:02] Hen**
Even in the darkest depths of despair,
he makes you forget all about giving up.
**[17:08] Hen**
That's what a hero does.
**[17:11] Hen**
Isn't that right, Matako-san?
**[17:16] Hen**
Let us all head together
**[17:20] Hen**
to where our hero awaits us!
**[18:54] En**
Y-You bastards!
**[19:31] (Flashback) Sho**
Strategist, we found your general.
**[19:36] (Flashback) Hen**
Really?!
**[19:37] (Flashback) Sho**
Yeah, but...
**[19:47] (Flashback) Sho**
He's already...
**[19:53] (Flashback) Tak**
Takechi?
**[19:55] (Flashback) Hen**
Shinsuke-dono! Are you hurt?
**[19:57] (Flashback) Tak**
You're worrying about me?
How far I've fallen.
**[20:02] (Flashback) Tak**
I'm fine. Just take care of Matako.
**[20:08] (Flashback) Tak**
Even if it was just by chance, she was
the key to the Kiheitai's formation.
**[20:13] (Flashback) Tak**
If anything happened to her,
Bansai would yell my ears off.
**[20:17] (Flashback) Hen**
Shinsuke-dono...
**[20:18] (Flashback) Tak**
There's no time.
**[20:20] (Flashback) Tak**
We're going ahead.
**[20:25] (Flashback) Sho**
You...
**[20:27] (Flashback) Sho**
No need to let them know.
**[20:29] (Flashback) Sho**
They don't need to know.
**[20:32] (Flashback) Sho**
I can't fall just yet. I must stay standing.
**[20:40] (Flashback) Sho**
I must remain the Takasugi
Shinsuke they believed in!
**[20:56] Sho**
Takasugi!
**[20:59] Tak**
*Your hero doesn't exist.*
**[21:06] Tak**
*He's merely a dream, a fabrication.*
**[21:10] Tak**
*And yet, will you still stand by me?*
**[21:28] Tak**
* Will you stand beside an ordinary*
* man named Takasugi Shinsuke?*
**[21:33] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama!
**[21:38] Mat**
*Perhaps I was the one dreaming...*
**[21:46] Mat**
*There's no need for a hero anymore.*
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Kat**
Our king certainly was there.
***SIGN*** Several Kings
***SIGN*** Ensho falls in the battle with Takasugi...
***SIGN*** What words does Nobunobu give the soldiers?
***SIGN*** And it's been a long time coming,
***SIGN*** but these sisters make their comebacks, too!
# 358 - Countless Kings
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[01:56] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama!
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!
**[02:03] Nbnb**
That'll be enough.
**[02:07] Nbnb**
We didn't come here for a clash of hatred.
**[02:13] Nbnb**
So please, men.
**[02:17] Nbnb**
Could you hold it in?
**[02:23] En**
No need for that.
**[02:26] En**
Finish me off.
**[02:28] En**
My hatred, and my sorrow with it,
**[02:33] En**
will stay with me as long as I'm alive.
**[02:38] En**
The object of her vengeance... was me.
**[02:45] En**
I kept running away from
her and to the battlefield,
**[02:51] En**
so I must be fated to die here.
**[02:55] Tak**
Are you scared of the war ending?
**[02:58] Tak**
Once it's over, even a hero will
go back to being an ordinary man.
**[03:05] Tak**
But that's his real battlefield.
**[03:11] Tak**
Now that your body is no
longer capable of running,
**[03:14] Tak**
face your suffering and struggle
for the rest of your life,
**[03:19] Tak**
as an ordinary man.
**[03:22] En**
You...
**[03:25] Tak**
I'm not all that different from you.
**[03:28] Tak**
I'm drowning in the countless
sins I've committed.
**[03:33] Tak**
However...
**[03:35] Tak**
If the man wrought by my sins...
**[03:39] Tak**
If that man over there tells me to stop,
I have no choice but to stop.
**[03:44] Tak**
Takasugi...
**[03:48] Sak**
Good grief. Can't defy the
shogun's orders, can we?
**[03:53] Kat**
I don't intend to look up
at that man as a shogun.
**[03:57] Kat**
But...
**[03:59] Kat**
If the real shogun were here,
**[04:03] Kat**
perhaps I would have.
**[04:13] Nbnb**
This is our battlefield no longer.
**[04:16] Nbnb**
Burdened with hatred and sorrow you may be,
**[04:19] Nbnb**
but you must still live on, my people.
**[04:24] En**
The same eyes.
**[04:27] En**
I could never match up to people
with that look in their eyes.
**[04:34] En**
The land of the samurai, eh?
**[04:36] En**
It is a wonderful country with wonderful
people and a wonderful king.
**[04:42] En**
I shall stop this ship from crashing.
**[04:45] En**
Would you help me?
**[04:48] G**
Prince.
**[04:51] Shi**
You fool.
**[04:58] Shi**
With those men,
**[05:00] Shi**
you could have walked down
a path to a different future.
**[05:05] Shi**
Why didn't you realize sooner, you fool?
**[05:08] En**
Forgive me, Shijaku.
**[05:15] Shi**
Ensho!
**[05:17] G**
S-Screw that!
**[05:19] G**
We kept fighting all this
time under your orders!
**[05:23] G**
If you stop now, what did
our comrades die for?!
**[05:26] Shi**
Why, you!
**[05:27] G**
Seize him!
**[05:29] Shi**
Ensho! Ensho!
**[05:42] Bo**
Nobunobu!
**[05:48] Nbnb**
Would you stop?!
**[05:53] Nbnb**
Hold it in...
**[05:56] Nbnb**
Did you not hear me the first time?
**[05:59] Sak**
Nobunobu...
**[06:01] Nbnb**
Forgive that man.
**[06:04] Nbnb**
He has said nothing wrong.
**[06:09] Nbnb**
If you still have ammunition,
**[06:11] Nbnb**
shoot me until you're satisfied.
**[06:15] Nbnb**
As the ones who started this war,
**[06:17] Nbnb**
we are obligated to take those shots.
**[06:21] Nbnb**
Fire every last shot you have.
**[06:22] Nbnb**
Even so,
**[06:24] Nbnb**
my people will suppress their
hatred and end this war!
**[06:37] Sak**
Hurry! Hurry up and treat him!
**[06:39] G**
Th-The medics are...
**[06:41] G**
They're all treating Mutsu-sama and
Elizabeth-san on Nobunobu-sama's orders.
**[06:45] Sak**
Nobunobu, you...
**[06:48] Nbnb**
It's fine. I knew this was coming.
**[06:54] Nbnb**
From the moment I killed the
shogun to take his place.
**[07:01] Nbnb**
I don't think I could ever
fill Shigeshige's shoes,
**[07:05] Nbnb**
but if a shogun in name alone
**[07:07] Nbnb**
can stop a war by simply
laying down his life,
**[07:11] Nbnb**
what more could you ask for?
**[07:13] Sak**
Our war ain't over yet.
**[07:17] Sak**
"Once a man bears the burden of leadin'
a country, he can't expect ta die so easily."
**[07:22] Sak**
Did you forget I told you that?
**[07:25] Sak**
Are you tryin' to make us foolish
people who let their king die twice?!
**[07:34] Nbnb**
King?
**[07:36] Nbnb**
You're willing to call me that?
**[07:41] Kat**
You were one of the stupidest
rulers in history.
**[07:45] Kat**
But back then, when you fought
with us to protect our country,
**[07:51] Kat**
our king certainly was there.
**[07:55] Nbnb**
Of all the silly things to say.
**[07:57] Nbnb**
Don't your hearts have them already?
**[08:04] Nbnb**
You were the ones who each fought
for the kings within your hearts.
**[08:15] Nbnb**
Our country no longer needs a shogun.
**[08:20] Nbnb**
I think I finally understand
why he said that.
**[08:26] Nbnb**
Even then, even if it was only for a moment,
**[08:32] Nbnb**
if I could become your shogun,
**[08:36] Nbnb**
then perhaps there was meaning
to Tokugawa Nobunobu's life.
**[08:42] Nbnb**
Thank you.
**[08:43] Nbnb**
And...
**[08:45] Nbnb**
I'm sorry.
**[08:49] Nbnb**
It seems the time has come.
**[08:56] Nbnb**
*As the last shogun, I must go with them.*
**[09:03] Nbnb**
*A kingless era is coming.*
**[09:07] Nbnb**
*But...*
**[09:17] Nbnb**
*I know all of you will be fine.*
**[09:22] Nbnb**
*I leave the rest to you,*
**[09:32] Nbnb**
*the countless kings inheriting this country.*
**[09:37] Nbnb**
* Let's put an end to this era that*
* gave birth to so much sorrow.*
**[09:46] Nbnb**
*And let's begin,*
**[09:49] Nbnb**
*by chopping off the shackles*
**[09:54] Nbnb**
*of the past,*
**[09:57] Nbnb**
*our new era.*
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Countless Kings
**[10:13] Uts**
The dragon is calming down.
**[10:16] Uts**
Someone is quelling the
surge in the ley lines.
**[10:19] Nar**
Only *they* could be capable of such a feat.
**[10:24] Uts**
They're still alive?
**[10:30] Uts**
The Priestesses of the Golden
Dragon and the Dog Deity...
**[10:33] Uts**
From the clan who have watched
over the Gate since ancient times.
**[10:50] Uts**
The ones who subdue the dragon's
rage and quell its surges.
**[10:57] Uts**
They are...
**[10:59] Mat**
Hello! Ane-chan, the
cabaret priestess, right?
**[11:02] Mat**
Long time no talk!
**[11:03] Mat**
Sorry. You went to the trouble of calling me,
**[11:05] Mat**
but I can't come to the club tonight.
**[11:09] Mat**
The world's about to be destroyed, you see.
**[11:11] Mat**
I can't get off work!
I don't know what to do!
**[11:15] Ane**
Oh, it's fine. I just
wanted to hear your voice.
**[11:19] Ane**
Okay, later!
**[11:21] Ane**
As if!
**[11:21] Ane**
Who'd make cabaret club
sales calls at this time?!
**[11:24] Ane**
Were you listening to a word I said?
**[11:25] Mat**
I am listening.
**[11:27] Mat**
Basically, you have two jobs: cabaret
girl and protector of the world.
**[11:30] Mat**
You just want me to keep it a
secret from the club, right?
**[11:33] Ane**
* Get your head out of the*
* cabaret club already!*
**[11:35] Ane**
Listen up, and listen well.
**[11:37] Ane**
We'll go around subduing
the ley line outbursts.
**[11:40] Ane**
You shut down whoever it is that's
controlling the gate below the terminal!
**[11:45] Ane**
That way, things will go back to normal.
**[11:48] Mat**
Ane-chan...
**[11:49] Ane**
*Please.*
**[11:50] Ane**
*All of this is happening to our country*
**[11:52] Ane**
because our clan couldn't protect the
gate from the Amanto in the first place.
**[12:00] Ane**
*We want to take back what we lost back then.*
**[12:05] Ane**
* But I don't know if you still have*
* the manpower to pull it off...*
**[12:09] Mat**
Yeah, we might not have enough.
**[12:14] Mat**
But if I'm ordering Dom Perignon
for everyone at the victory party,
**[12:17] Mat**
*this will make it easier on my bank account.*
**[12:24] Kam**
You look like death. What's wrong?
**[12:27] Kam**
Looking for something?
**[12:29] Kam**
Is it this silver big bro over here,
**[12:32] Kam**
or the bloodied big bro over here?
**[12:35] Kam**
Just kidding.
**[12:36] Kag**
Gin-chan! Kamui!
**[12:38] Shin**
Thank goodness! We believed you'd make it!
**[12:42] Kag**
Did you do this to Gin-chan?!
**[12:45] Kam**
Please don't insult me.
**[12:48] Kam**
That monster stole my prey before,
**[12:51] Kam**
so I repaid the favor.
**[12:55] Shin**
You just tried to kill
him before Utsuro could!
**[12:59] Gin**
I get the feeling I would've been better
off eating the Altana explosion.
**[13:03] Kam**
You would've died if I'd
gone all-out, y'know.
**[13:05] Gin**
I would've died if I
*hadn't* gone all-out, too.
**[13:07] Kam**
Well, learn your lesson from
this and be more careful.
**[13:13] Kam**
I'm sick and tired of losing.
**[13:15] Kam**
Even having you gone would leave
us unable to beat that monster.
**[13:20] Kag**
Kamui...
**[13:22] Oki**
Yeesh.
**[13:24] Oki**
You're letting a boar
lecture you not to be rash?
**[13:27] Oki**
How the mighty have fallen, boss.
**[13:29] Oki**
But he's got a point.
**[13:31] Oki**
You're losing sight of everything
around you when you face that guy.
**[13:35] Oki**
Otherwise, you wouldn't have let
the boar land a kick on you.
**[13:39] Kam**
Are you saying you can dodge
that boar's kicks, then?
**[13:44] Oki**
Sorry, but I'm not falling
for your cheap provocation.
**[13:47] Oki**
Besides, we can't afford to lose
any more manpower or boarpower.
**[13:52] Kam**
No need to worry.
**[13:54] Kam**
I can more than make up for your loss.
**[13:57] Oki**
Oh? Them's fighting words.
**[13:58] Kag**
Hey, stop it!
**[13:59] Kag**
Enough of that knocked-down
Vegeta and Piccolo dialogue!
**[14:02] Kag**
We're all tired of it!
**[14:03] Oki**
Let's keep it simple, then.
**[14:05] Oki**
Your sister's ugly!
**[14:08] Kam**
Right back at ya.
**[14:09] Kag**
"Right back at ya," my ass!
**[14:11] Kag**
Take that back!
**[14:12] Gin**
Sheesh, now I owe a real weirdo one.
**[14:17] Shin**
I'm just glad you survived that situation.
**[14:20] Gin**
How about the others?
**[14:21] Shin**
No idea. All of Edo is in a similar state.
**[14:25] Shin**
Who knows just how many
casualties there were?
**[14:28] Abu**
Looks like humans weren't the only victims.
**[14:31] Shin**
Gengai-san! You're okay!
**[14:34] Gen**
Do I look okay? These guys...
**[14:38] Gen**
They threw me around like a sack of garbage!
**[14:42] Abu**
I heard that on this planet, both useless
people and objects are seen as junk.
**[14:47] Gen**
The real junk is the medals awarded to
those who burn out in the line of duty!
**[14:53] Gen**
Learn from those guys!
They fulfilled their duty!
**[14:56] Shin**
Fulfilled their duty?
**[14:58] Abu**
Oh, the nanomachine virus
this geezer scattered.
**[15:02] Abu**
It seems it's completely dead.
**[15:04] Shin**
The bees are?
**[15:06] Shin**
Then right now, Edo is...
**[15:07] Gen**
Completely defenseless.
**[15:10] Gen**
If the Liberation Army fleet attacks
now, we have no means to stop them.
**[15:16] Shin**
Dammit!
**[15:16] Abu**
Looking at this country, everyone
would think only one thing...
**[15:20] Abu**
"The battle has already been decided."
**[15:24] Abu**
Maybe it's only the ones here
who haven't admitted defeat yet.
**[15:31] Tak**
*There are some here, too.*
**[15:34] Tak**
*Above you,*
**[15:36] Tak**
*all the way up in space.*
**[15:39] Tak**
Don't worry about the Liberation Army.
**[15:42] Tak**
They've been dealt with already.
**[15:46] Tak**
Gintoki,
**[15:47] Tak**
it's your turn now.
**[15:51] Gin**
That so?
**[15:52] Gin**
I don't know who you are,
**[15:55] Gin**
but thanks for covering
our asses from space.
**[15:59] Gin**
But you shouldn't have bothered.
**[16:02] Gin**
Not a single person here
has been rendered junk yet.
**[16:08] Gin**
What we tried to protect doesn't
have a single scratch on it.
**[16:13] Gin**
It's too early for talk of medals.
**[16:18] Gin**
*How about you?*
**[16:20] Gin**
* Surely you haven't turned into junk just*
* from stopping the Liberation Army.*
**[16:25] Tak**
Of course not.
**[16:26] Tak**
*Be ready, because I'm coming for you.*
**[16:30] Mone**
Sister, something's off with Komako.
**[16:33] Ane**
Must be using up too much Zen power.
**[16:35] Ane**
If only we had him right now...
**[16:38] Mone**
Sister! You know he chose to
walk down a different path!
**[16:43] Mone**
It's too late...
**[16:46] Mone**
Komako?
**[16:48] Ane**
That howl...
***SIGN*** Lake Touya
**[16:51] Hij**
Okay, gotcha.
**[16:55] Hij**
Hey. Took you long enough.
**[17:00] Hij**
We found a way to stop that.
**[17:04] Hij**
But we should hurry.
**[17:07] Hij**
The dog's gone.
**[17:09] Hij**
You know why, don't you?
**[17:13] Mone**
Komako!
**[17:17] Ane**
Are you saying you'll fight with us?
**[17:22] Kon**
Dog Deities?
**[17:24] Hij**
Yeah. According to Pops,
Edo is only barely holding on
**[17:28] Hij**
thanks to those dubious occult beings.
**[17:33] Hij**
We've gotta crush the enemy while
they're subduing the surge.
**[17:37] Kon**
Got it.
**[17:38] Kon**
I'll take everyone who can
fight and head right there.
**[17:43] Kon**
If even dogs lost faith in
humans and rose up themselves,
**[17:47] Kon**
how can we not claw our way back up, too?
**[17:53] Gin**
That stupid mutt!
**[17:55] Gin**
Why'd he have to remember an ancient premise
that even our viewers have forgotten?
**[17:59] Abu**
Do the people of this planet beg even
dogs for help when they're desperate?
**[18:04] Gin**
We haven't fallen far enough
to accept help from rabbits.
**[18:07] Abu**
Offering you our help would
be selling ourselves short.
**[18:10] Abu**
Commander!
**[18:11] Abu**
We're going ahead.
**[18:14] Abu**
Rabbits only help out other rabbits.
**[18:16] Abu**
That other rabbit over there?
**[18:18] Abu**
Babysit her yourself, "Big Bro."
**[18:22] Kam**
Wait, Abuto!
**[18:24] Kam**
Those guys palmed all the
dead weight off on me!
**[18:27] Gin**
What was that?
**[18:28] Kam**
I said I'd kick you again if
you don't get a move on.
**[18:32] Gin**
And whose fault is it that
my body's so slow now?
**[18:35] Gin**
Just you try kicking me.
**[18:36] Gin**
I'll slow down until I'm dead.
**[18:39] (Flashback) Kag**
There has to be something only you can do.
**[18:45] Kag**
*If I hadn't said that to him...*
**[18:48] Soy**
*I'm so sorry, Kagura-chan.*
**[18:51] Soy**
* I should've kept closer*
* watch on Sadaharu-kun.*
**[18:54] Kag**
*It's not your fault!*
**[18:57] Nob**
Exactly. Both he and that man
**[19:01] Nob**
made their own decisions and
went off of their own will.
**[19:06] Nob**
They could only take that
step without hesitation
**[19:10] Nob**
because they had people they could
trust with things behind them.
**[19:14] Nob**
That's what you need to be.
**[19:18] Nob**
Take care of the princess.
**[19:24] Soy**
Nobume-san?
**[19:25] Soy**
Nobume-san!
**[19:31] Nob**
*The enemy seems to have noticed our moves.*
**[19:35] Nob**
I'll lead them away from the princess.
**[19:39] Nob**
The enemy's presence vanished...?
**[19:42] Kag**
Nobutas? Nobutas!
**[19:46] Kam**
Jump!
**[19:57] Gin**
These guys...
**[20:02] Kag**
Outta my way!
**[20:05] Kag**
I don't have time to waste on you!
**[20:08] Kag**
Get out of my way!
**[20:10] Gin**
Don't push yourself,
Kagura! These guys are...
**[20:17] Gin**
Kagura!
**[20:22] Kam**
So what if the enemy's immortal?
**[20:25] Kam**
If they won't die, we can just
break them until they can't move.
**[20:33] Kag**
Kamui!
**[20:34] Kam**
Unfortunately for you, I may not be immortal,
**[20:40] Kam**
but this isn't nearly enough to break me.
**[20:43] Kag**
Kamui, you...
**[20:45] Kam**
Calm down a little.
**[20:47] Kam**
Rabbits only help out other rabbits.
**[20:50] Kam**
If you go and die, the
big rabbit won't show up.
**[21:00] Kam**
Hey, you're late.
**[21:02] Kam**
Your dear little bunnies are crying.
**[21:05] UB**
Oh? Where are they?
**[21:08] UB**
I only see mischievous little brats.
**[21:11] Kag**
Daddy! Nobutas!
**[21:13] Gin**
Umibozu!
**[21:14] UB**
This is the planet that
started the end of the world.
**[21:18] UB**
I came prepared not to be surprised
by anything I ran into here.
**[21:23] UB**
But even after 25 years as an alien hunter,
**[21:26] UB**
the universe still has surprises
left in store for me.
**[21:32] UB**
This world really is too amusing to end!
**[21:43] UB**
Oh? Are you the failures who
inherited Utsuro's blood?
**[21:48] UB**
But immortality isn't exclusive to you.
**[21:52] UB**
This geezer, who came back from the dead
to repay your boss for what he did,
**[21:57] UB**
and the people still fighting
in this planet of rubble...
**[22:01] UB**
We are immortal and indomitable, standing
back up no matter how many times we fall.
**[22:05] UB**
Who knows who'll be the last one standing?
**[22:10] UB**
As for you...
**[22:12] UB**
Die right here and now!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Mad**
This time, I'll climb back up
from rock-bottom with you.
***SIGN*** The Unemployed Cannot
Be Stained By Anything
***SIGN*** Umibozu joins the fray!
***SIGN*** And he makes an immediate impact!
***SIGN*** Meanwhile, Prince Hata is forced by his brother, Shijaku,
***SIGN*** to make an impossible choice!
# 359 - The Unemployed Cannot Be Stained By Anything
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** The Unemployed Cannot
Be Stained By Anything
**[01:40] UB**
As for you...
**[01:44] UB**
Die right here and now!
**[01:50] Kag**
What do you think you're
doing, you stupid cue ball?!
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!
**[01:52] UB**
Tch.
**[01:53] UB**
How do you have the gall to show
up after everything you've done?
**[01:58] UB**
I'll end you this time for sure.
**[02:00] Kag**
You're wrong, Daddy! He...
**[02:02] UB**
I'm not wrong about anything.
**[02:05] UB**
A big bro who got a hole in his
belly protecting his kid sister?
**[02:09] UB**
No father would ever praise
him for doing a good job.
**[02:13] UB**
If he's here to do stupid crap like
that, I'll take him out for good.
**[02:18] Kam**
That so?
**[02:20] Kam**
No need to worry, then.
**[02:22] Kam**
I still have the strength left to kill you!
**[02:30] Kam**
I wanted to save the main dish for last,
**[02:32] Kam**
but if you insist, I'll gobble
it down with the appetizer!
**[02:35] Gin**
Hold it, you morons!
**[02:38] UB**
What did you just say?!
**[02:40] UB**
Whose head is Made in Bangladesh?!
**[02:43] Gin**
Nobody said anything of the sort!
**[02:45] UB**
There's nothing up there!
I'm not wearing a wig!
**[02:52] Kag**
That's enough.
**[02:57] Kag**
You two...
**[02:59] Kag**
Even at a time like this, you wanna fight?
**[03:02] Kag**
No matter how much time passes or
where we are, you never learn, do you?
**[03:07] Kag**
But that's just fine.
**[03:12] Kag**
Even if it's just for a moment,
my entire family's on Earth.
**[03:16] Kag**
That's enough for me.
**[03:23] Nob**
Run!
**[03:24] Nob**
We're breaking through!
**[03:28] Kam**
Damn!
**[03:30] UB**
Use it. It'll stop your bleeding.
**[03:33] UB**
I don't care if you die a
dog's death out of my sight.
**[03:36] UB**
But I won't let you die on this planet.
**[03:44] Kam**
I didn't do that for you.
**[03:46] Kam**
Direct your thanks to her.
**[03:52] (Flashback) Kag**
Earth?
**[03:54] (Flashback) Kou**
Yeah. Your father told me
about it a long time ago.
**[03:59] (Flashback) Kou**
That there's a very beautiful
blue planet out there.
**[04:04] (Flashback) Kam**
So, did you get to go there?
**[04:07] (Flashback) Kou**
No. Who knows when I'll be able to?
**[04:10] (Flashback) Kag**
Let's go to Earth, Mommy.
**[04:13] (Flashback) Kag**
Let's go with Daddy and Kamui...
The whole family, together.
**[04:19] Kag**
*Mommy, sorry we kept you waiting so long.*
**[04:23] Kag**
*But everyone's here now.*
**[04:27] Kag**
*Here, on Earth.*
**[04:31] Gin**
Was it you, Nobume?
**[04:33] Gin**
Was it you who brought another
nuke to a nuke site?!
**[04:36] Nob**
A nuke? Do you really think
that would bring down Utsuro?
**[04:40] Nob**
He's the trump card, the only
one who can defeat Utsuro.
**[04:42] Nob**
I brought him along because he said that.
**[04:45] Nob**
And to me, an outsider,
**[04:47] Nob**
they look like two peas in a pod,
a loving father and son.
**[04:49] Bo**
Are you blind?!
**[04:51] Ub**
I told you, didn't I?
**[04:53] Ub**
That I'd definitely find a way to kill him?
**[04:57] Shin**
N-No way...
**[04:59] Ub**
I collected, from every
corner of the universe,
**[05:04] Ub**
the crystals that the planets gave birth to!
**[05:10] Ub**
Our fragments of hope...
**[05:12] Ub**
Altana crystallites!
**[05:15] Shin**
Crystallites?
**[05:16] Gin**
If we have those things, can we
nullify Utsuro's immortality?
**[05:20] UB**
Utsuro's no immortal.
**[05:23] UB**
If his body takes a strong
dose of incompatible Altana,
**[05:27] UB**
he can't maintain his immortality.
**[05:31] UB**
I couldn't save Kouka.
**[05:35] UB**
So this time I'm going to make sure,
with the hope she gave me,
**[05:41] UB**
to save this planet she so loved.
**[05:45] UB**
Behold.
**[05:47] UB**
This is what's hidden in the crystallites...
**[05:50] UB**
The power of Altana!
**[05:55] UB**
When I sprinkled them on my head,
I grew a full head of hair!
**[06:00] UB**
What'd you do that for?
**[06:02] UB**
Ow... Look, my head!
**[06:04] UB**
It has so much hair!
**[06:06] Kag**
Come off it! What the hell are
you using the crystallites for?!
**[06:10] Ub**
I'm showing the enemies that they're
not the only immortal ones.
**[06:14] Ub**
My hair roots are, too!
**[06:15] Shin**
That serves no purpose at all!
**[06:17] Kam**
Then let me take a good look, too.
**[06:20] Kam**
Immortal? It's a wig, just like always.
**[06:23] UB**
Everyone's hair turns into a wig
when pulled with that much force!
**[06:26] UB**
What have you done, you little shit?!
**[06:28] Shin**
We don't have time for that crap!
**[06:30] Shin**
The enemy's coming!
**[06:31] UB**
Good grief. If you're
baddies in a Sentai show,
**[06:34] UB**
you're supposed to take a hint and not
attack while the robots are combining.
**[06:39] Shin**
But all we've got is a
cue ball and a wig combining!
**[06:41] Ub**
I'll have to take the hint too, then.
**[06:45] Ub**
I'll show you the power of an Altana
weapon made from crystallites.
**[06:51] Ub**
Ready... Fire!
**[06:55] Ub**
Buy me three seconds! It'll grow right back!
**[06:58] All**
Who would wait?!
**[07:01] Gin**
What's all this about?!
**[07:03] Gin**
Our last hope, the crystallites,
are being used on nothing but trash!
**[07:06] Nob**
If that's our trump card, Earth is done for.
**[07:10] Nob**
Nothing but hair roots will remain.
**[07:11] Kag**
Those hair roots should die, too!
**[07:12] Shin**
We can't break through like this!
**[07:28] Shin**
It fired something!
**[07:30] UB**
I told you.
**[07:31] UB**
An old man and a cannon are
combining! Take a hint!
**[07:35] UB**
Converting Altana extracted
from crystallites
**[07:39] UB**
and firing it all is what this
Altana weapon, Shoryumon, does!
**[07:43] UB**
It was a byproduct born while I
was building the hair-growth gun.
**[07:47] Shin**
That other one's clearly the extra here!
**[07:49] UB**
The Altana imbued in it
can destroy any immortal.
**[07:54] UB**
What's more, the Altana particles
the cannon spreads in the air
**[07:58] UB**
eat into the bodies of all immortals nearby.
**[08:05] UB**
The immortals won't be able to stand anymore.
**[08:09] UB**
The last ones standing
**[08:12] UB**
will be us!
**[08:15] Kag**
You damn cue ball!
**[08:16] Shin**
If you had that thing,
why didn't you use it sooner?!
**[08:18] Shin**
What was all that about the hair growth?
Did you just want to show off?!
**[08:21] UB**
Wait, wait! That wasn't my intention!
**[08:25] UB**
The Shoryumon takes a while
to charge up and fire.
**[08:28] UB**
I have to make every shot count.
**[08:30] Gin**
What? Don't you have any
other Altana weapons?
**[08:34] UB**
I do, but they're limited in number...
**[08:38] Kam**
Wow, these tiny bombs are amazing!
**[08:41] Kam**
They're sending the immortals
flying like garbage!
**[08:43] UB**
Stop wasting my weapons!
When did you swipe them, anyway?!
**[08:47] Kam**
I'm pretty sure this is much better
than using them in a hair-growth agent.
**[08:51] Kam**
Besides, with these things,
**[08:54] Kam**
I can hold off those corpses all by myself.
**[08:58] Kam**
Get going. There's no time, right?
**[09:01] Kam**
I'm already tired of babysitting you.
**[09:04] Kam**
Why should I have to take care of a dog, too?
**[09:08] Shin**
Kamui-san.
**[09:09] UB**
True.
**[09:10] UB**
If he needs a little girl
to watch over him forever,
**[09:13] UB**
a man will lose all face.
**[09:15] Kam**
Are you referring to me?
**[09:19] UB**
Not you. I'm talking about me.
**[09:23] UB**
But no need to worry anymore.
**[09:25] UB**
Even without you,
**[09:29] UB**
we'll be all right.
**[09:31] UB**
So get going.
**[09:33] UB**
This time, for the new family
you've found for yourself...
**[09:37] UB**
And for yourself.
**[09:41] UB**
Take this and go.
**[09:43] UB**
I made it by forging steel that
was imbued with crystallite.
**[09:48] UB**
You samurai love your swords, don't you?
**[09:52] Gin**
You know, samurai used to
wield two weapons in the past.
**[09:56] Gin**
Only when they carried both a long and a
short sword were they seen as true warriors.
**[10:02] Gin**
But at some point, they
threw away their pride,
**[10:04] Gin**
lost the beliefs they were meant to uphold,
**[10:07] Gin**
and were left with only one
sword, for self-defense.
**[10:10] Gin**
I staggered through that darkness,
swinging a stick of wood around,
**[10:15] Gin**
and somehow managed to get this far.
**[10:19] Gin**
It was only because I had two
blunt yet unbreakable swords
**[10:24] Gin**
with me right here.
**[10:27] Gin**
I thank you for helping me
meet one of those dullards.
**[10:33] Gin**
So long as I have these two on my waist,
**[10:35] Gin**
this samurai won't break.
**[10:40] Gin**
I swear I'll come back, both swords in tow.
**[10:45] UB**
Hey, do you think that was his way of
asking for my daughter's hand in marriage?
**[10:51] Kam**
That just occurred to you?
**[10:53] Kam**
I thought you were prepared
for that all along.
**[10:56] UB**
Don't be stupid.
**[10:58] UB**
Kouka hated wimps like that.
**[11:02] UB**
Ah, I see.
**[11:03] UB**
Well, she did choose a blimp
for a husband, after all.
**[11:06] UB**
But yeah, nothing beats a son.
**[11:10] UB**
A daughter will leave
for another man someday,
**[11:12] UB**
but a son doesn't leave his old man alone.
**[11:15] UB**
Seriously.
**[11:16] UB**
I'm always having my life targeted,
my arm ripped off, or my hair torn off!
**[11:22] UB**
Daddy's so happy to have such a merry family!
**[11:35] Mon**
We've quelled more or less
all of them, I guess?
**[11:38] Ane**
The only spot left is that one.
**[11:41] Mon**
Time for checkmate.
**[11:46] Ane**
Let me express my gratitude.
**[11:48] Ane**
We gave up on you and threw you out.
**[11:52] Ane**
But you never abandoned us.
***SIGN*** Please Take Me Home
**[11:58] Ane**
No, that's not it.
**[12:00] Ane**
I'm sure what you wanted to protect was...
**[12:05] Ane**
I promise you.
**[12:07] Ane**
We will take you home to your family.
**[12:10] Ane**
So give us a bit more...
**[12:14] Ane**
Huh?
**[12:16] Ane**
Wait a second. Time-out.
**[12:18] Ane**
Were you always this size?
**[12:21] Mon**
What's the matter, Sister?
**[12:23] Ane**
Did I use too much Zen power?
**[12:26] Ane**
A large is looking like a medium to me.
**[12:28] Mon**
It isn't just your imagination.
You've grown larger, Sister.
**[12:34] Mon**
You stooped as low as becoming
a cabaret priestess for a while,
**[12:37] Mon**
but now you're fighting to
fulfill our clan's duty.
**[12:40] Mon**
How you've grown, truly.
**[12:43] Mon**
I can see it, too.
**[12:44] Mon**
You look larger than life,
like Obayashi Motoko.
**[12:48] Mon**
Right, Komako?
**[12:51] Ane**
Even Komako's tiny now!
**[12:54] Ane**
What's going on? Why is this happening?!
**[12:57] Ane**
Don't tell me, is this...
**[13:00] Ane**
Mone!
**[13:06] Mon**
Sister!
**[13:10] Ane**
Run!
**[13:14] Shin**
An earthquake?
**[13:15] Gin**
The ley lines were getting quieter!
Now they're going nuts again?!
**[13:19] Kag**
What's that mean?
**[13:20] Kag**
Sadaharu and the others should be
holding it down right now!
**[13:23] Nob**
Only the tributaries were calmed down.
**[13:26] Nob**
The main river still remains.
**[13:29] Nob**
Could it be, that man...
**[13:43] Nob**
The Gate burst.
**[13:45] Nob**
Nobody can stop it anymore.
**[13:47] Nob**
Not Utsuro, not anyone.
**[13:52] U**
Your welcoming party is ready.
**[13:55] U**
I'm waiting for you, Shoyo's pupils.
**[14:06] Shi**
We've lost all control
of the Heavenly Bird now.
**[14:10] Shi**
We have no time to evacuate
the people on board, either.
**[14:14] Shi**
But if we can destroy the ship
before it crashes into Earth,
**[14:19] Shi**
we can save that planet
and the entire galaxy.
**[14:23] Shi**
And the only ones capable
of that right now...
**[14:27] Shi**
*Hata, it's you and your people.*
**[14:31] Hat**
Admiral, are you telling me to save people?
**[14:35] Hat**
Or are you telling me to kill them?
**[14:40] Shi**
*I don't know, either.*
**[14:43] Shi**
But any path that you choose, as one
who has loved every living being,
**[14:48] Shi**
is a path that I can
believe is the right one.
**[14:54] Shi**
Hata, your brother...
**[15:03] Shi**
Your two brothers stand by you!
**[15:06] Shi**
*So don't hesitate.*
**[15:08] Shi**
*Believe in your heart and move forward!*
**[15:13] Jii**
Prince...
**[15:15] Mad**
What're you waiting for?
The answer should already be obvious.
**[15:19] Mad**
Actually, the you of old
would never have hesitated.
**[15:25] Hat**
I suppose.
**[15:27] Hat**
But I don't know why...
**[15:30] (Flashback) Shi**
Become a kind king who loves
all living beings, Hata.
**[15:35] (Flashback) Mad**
I said shut up, you pet freak!
**[15:40] Hat**
But there's a part of me that doesn't want
to destroy either the ship or the planet!
**[15:47] Hat**
Thinking back, meeting a bizarre
creature on Earth sealed my fate.
**[15:55] Hat**
You will take responsibility
for this, samurai.
**[15:58] Hat**
If I make the wrong choice
again, punch me in the face.
**[16:04] Hat**
All ships, prepare to fire!
**[16:07] Hat**
The target: the Heavenly Bird!
**[16:10] Hat**
Forgive me, my brothers!
**[16:13] Hat**
Fi...
**[16:19] Jii**
He really punched him! He punched
him at the worst possible time!
**[16:22] Jii**
What? What did the prince get wrong?
**[16:25] Jii**
Did he do something bad?
**[16:26] Mad**
His face.
**[16:28] Jii**
What do you mean, he got his
face wrong? That's nothing new!
**[16:31] Jii**
That face has always been a fail!
**[16:33] Mad**
I punched you, lost my job,
**[16:36] Mad**
and hit rock bottom in life.
**[16:39] Mad**
I regretted my choice over and over,
and over and over I wanted to kill myself.
**[16:43] Mad**
But you know what looking at your
face right now made me feel?
**[16:47] Mad**
It made me glad I socked you.
**[16:49] Mad**
So I did it once more.
**[16:52] Mad**
Only this time, it was to climb
back up from rock bottom with you!
**[16:57] Mad**
Will you quietly watch Earth be destroyed?
**[17:01] Mad**
Or will you destroy the ship your
brothers and comrades are on to save it?
**[17:06] Mad**
Even a child would know which
choice here is right or wrong.
**[17:13] Mad**
They're both wrong.
**[17:15] Mad**
The only right choice is to save
it all, both Earth and that ship!
**[17:22] Mon**
Sister, please hang in there.
**[17:24] Ane**
Shut up and drive.
**[17:27] Ane**
I can't quit right now.
**[17:30] Ane**
These two are starting to lose their
bodies due to using so much Zen power.
**[17:36] Ane**
At this rate, their very
existences may be erased.
**[17:40] Mon**
Erased? No...
**[17:48] Ane**
Mone!
**[18:02] Ane**
Komako...
**[18:03] Ane**
Komako!
**[18:06] Shi**
Hata! Why won't you fire?!
**[18:09] Mad**
*Admiral, I'm with Immigration.*
**[18:13] Mad**
* Sorry, but we can't shoot down*
* a ship with our comrades on it.*
**[18:16] Shi**
Of all the stupid...
**[18:18] Shi**
Are you saying you'll approve
this burning ship's entry?!
**[18:22] Mad**
*Yeah. Welcome.*
**[18:25] Mad**
If we can't stop it, we'll have to let it in.
**[18:29] Mad**
This is a job for ex-Immigration
Bureau Chief Hasegawa Taizo.
**[18:35] Mad**
All ships, full speed ahead!
**[18:38] Mad**
Take position in front of the Heavenly Bird!
**[18:41] Shi**
Are you out of your mind?!
**[18:43] Hat**
Admiral!
**[18:45] Hat**
Didn't you say you could
believe in my choice?
**[18:48] Hat**
*Then believe in me.*
**[18:51] Hat**
Believe in the choice this
man I believed in made!
**[18:56] Hat**
I'm a kid brother who loves his brothers
and the creatures known as samurai,
**[19:01] Hat**
and this is my answer!
**[19:10] Shi**
Anti-impact shields?
**[19:12] Shi**
Don't tell me,
**[19:13] Shi**
you plan to stop this ship head-on?!
**[19:17] Shi**
This is insane! You'll be dragged
down to Earth along with this ship!
**[19:22] Mad**
Exactly.
**[19:24] Mad**
But if we can delay the impact
even a little, that's enough.
**[19:30] Mad**
I know who's down there on Earth.
**[19:34] Mad**
I know that they, and Earth,
**[19:37] Mad**
will definitely come back to life!
**[19:43] Shin**
Ane-san! Mone-san!
**[19:45] Nob**
I'll take care of things here.
**[19:47] Nob**
Hurry up and go to him.
**[19:52] Mad**
Insane?
**[19:53] Mad**
I say abandoning one or the
other is much more insane.
**[19:57] Mad**
If both choices are insane,
**[19:59] Mad**
I'd rather choose the world with
the people I can trust in it.
**[20:04] Mad**
*No need for IDs or annoying paperwork.*
**[20:07] Mad**
* It doesn't matter if you're*
* Earthlings or otherwise.*
**[20:11] Mad**
*Just bring your stupid faces back home alive!*
**[20:17] Mad**
That's the kind of passport
the land of the samurai issues.
**[20:22] G**
Prince! The shields have
crossed critical load!
**[20:25] G**
We can't hold it off anymore!
**[20:27] G**
If this keeps up, the entire
fleet will be crushed!
**[20:30] Jii**
It really didn't work!
**[20:32] Jii**
That's why I told you not to
do this, you stupid prince!
**[20:35] Hat**
Shut up, Gramps!
**[20:36] Jii**
Hey, Hasegawa, take responsibility for this.
**[20:38] Jii**
What did you base this moronic plan on?
**[20:42] Mad**
The entire universe.
**[20:44] Mad**
That thing can't be stopped unless we
gather all the ships in the universe.
**[20:48] Jii**
Huh? Quit sleeptalking, you dimwit!
**[20:52] Jii**
As if we could...
**[20:53] LibA**
*We have all the ships you need right here.*
**[20:57] LibA**
* Earthlings, you clawed your*
* way back from total despair.*
**[21:01] LibB**
* And now, you're trying to save*
* our mother ship from sinking.*
**[21:06] LibC**
* I'm amazed you're trying to save*
* all those lives, ally or enemy!*
**[21:11] LibD**
*Perhaps we misjudged you people.*
**[21:14] LibE**
* Ex-Immigration Bureau Chief,*
* was it? Would you give us a chance?*
**[21:19] LibA**
*If you say you'll save our mother ship...*
**[21:22] LibB**
* ...we'll use our entire fleet*
* to protect your planet.*
**[21:27] Hat**
The Liberation Army?!
**[21:29] Mad**
That so?
**[21:30] Mad**
Guess giving away our passports
for cheap paid off.
**[21:35] Mad**
Welcome to the land of the samurai.
**[21:47] Shi**
I-Impossible.
**[21:49] Shi**
Who are you really, Hasegawa Taizo?
**[21:52] Shi**
Just how much power and
influence do you have?!
**[21:55] Mad**
Isn't that obvious?
**[21:57] Mad**
I answer to no authority and am free
to say and do whatever I please,
**[22:02] Mad**
without having to take
responsibility for any of it.
**[22:06] Mad**
But I have no power, influence, or money.
**[22:10] Mad**
Hell, I don't even have a job.
**[22:15] Mad**
I'm just an unemployed man.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Gin**
No matter what, I'm not letting go!
***SIGN*** Always Hold On to Your Trump Cards
***SIGN*** Being unemployed may seem awesome all of a sudden,
***SIGN*** but please take great care with your life choices in the real world.
***SIGN*** Meanwhile, the war started by Utsuro
***SIGN*** is reaching its climax...
# 360 - Always Hold On to Your Trump Cards
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!!
**[00:04] Ane**
These two are starting to lose their
bodies due to using so much Zen power.
**[00:11] Ane**
At this rate, their very
existences may be erased.
**[00:15] Mon**
Erased? No...
**[00:21] Mad**
All ships, full speed ahead!
**[00:24] Mad**
Take position in front of the Heavenly Bird!
**[00:27] Shi**
Anti-impact shields?
**[00:29] Shi**
Don't tell me...
**[00:30] Shi**
you plan to stop this ship head-on?!
**[00:34] Shin**
Ane-san! Mone-san!
**[00:36] Nob**
I'll take care of things here.
**[00:38] Nob**
Hurry up and go to him.
**[00:41] LibE**
Ex-Immigration Bureau Chief,
was it? Would you give us a chance?
**[00:46] LibA**
If you say you'll save our mother ship...
**[00:49] LibB**
...we'll use our entire fleet
to protect your planet.
**[00:54] Mad**
That so?
**[00:55] Mad**
Guess giving away our passports
for cheap paid off.
**[01:00] Mad**
Welcome to the land of the samurai.
**[01:29] (Flashback) Ane**
We'll go with you.
**[01:32] (Flashback) Ane**
You're not going alone.
**[01:35] (Flashback) Ane**
We won't let you.
**[01:40] (Flashback) Ane**
Forgive me.
**[01:43] (Flashback) Ane**
I know.
**[01:45] (Flashback) Ane**
I know that we'll only be dead weight.
**[01:51] (Flashback) Ane**
So take it...
**[01:55] (Flashback) Ane**
Take everything we have.
**[02:03] (Flashback) Ane**
Forget about fulfilling your duty.
**[02:06] (Flashback) Ane**
Use these powers for yourself
**[02:09] (Flashback) Ane**
and the people you care about most.
**[02:16] (Flashback) Ane**
Don't you dare die, okay?
**[02:58] (Flashback) Ane**
Forget about fulfilling your duty.
***SIGN*** Please Take Me Home
**[03:03] (Flashback) Ane**
Use these powers for yourself
**[03:06] (Flashback) Ane**
and the people you care about most.
**[03:24] Gin**
Hey.
**[03:26] Gin**
That's my dog.
**[03:29] Gin**
What do you think you're doing to him?
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Always Hold On to Your Trump Cards
**[05:39] U**
So you've come.
**[05:42] Bo**
Sadaharu!
**[05:53] Kag**
Sadaharu!
**[06:04] Kag**
Sadaharu!
**[06:08] Gin**
Sadaharu!
**[06:29] U**
There is nothing you people
can protect anymore.
**[06:38] Gin**
We were okay
**[06:40] Gin**
with having a plain old dog
that just barked and woofed.
**[06:46] Gin**
That was all we wanted.
**[06:59] U**
What is this?
**[07:01] Gin**
Do you think he was the kind of dog
that'd leave unfinished food in his bowl?
**[07:07] Gin**
I'm nothing more than his owner.
**[07:11] Gin**
Until he goes back to being a plain old dog,
**[07:15] Gin**
I'll just keep howling beside him.
**[07:19] U**
I see.
**[07:22] Shin**
He's alive?
**[07:24] Shin**
Sadaharu...
**[07:27] Shin**
Sadaharu's still fighting!
**[07:32] U**
But the world is still going to end.
**[07:37] U**
Shouldn't you release him from his suffering
**[07:39] U**
and die together with him?
**[07:43] U**
Isn't that the least you
can do as his family?
**[07:48] Gin**
You have no right to speak of family.
**[07:56] Gin**
We're no family.
**[07:59] Gin**
We aren't related by blood,
**[08:02] Gin**
and our birthplaces are all different.
**[08:05] Gin**
There's nothing binding us together.
**[08:07] Gin**
And that's why...
**[08:11] Gin**
we'll never let go of each other's hands!
**[08:18] Shin**
None of you shall pass.
**[08:22] Kag**
We'll crush every single
piece of despair right here.
**[08:27] Gin**
There's a world where he can
live as simply the Odd Jobs dog,
**[08:32] Gin**
and we're taking it back!
**[08:39] U**
How foolish.
**[08:49] U**
Humans really do deserve to die out.
**[08:54] Gin**
If you wanna die so badly,
**[08:55] Gin**
I'll put an end to you.
**[08:59] Gin**
Now, you guys are just like us, too.
**[09:07] Gin**
You're just human.
**[09:12] Gin**
Utsuro!
**[09:26] U**
I see.
**[09:28] U**
Thank you for giving me such a
close look at your trump card.
**[09:33] U**
So much so that a hole opened up.
**[09:35] U**
However...
**[09:37] U**
You can't kill me like that.
**[09:45] U**
This is Earth, my birth planet.
**[09:48] U**
Here, I can absorb all the Altana I need
**[09:51] U**
to reconstruct my body.
**[09:54] U**
So long as you don't destroy this planet,
**[09:57] U**
I will not go down.
**[10:02] Shin**
No...
**[10:04] U**
Isn't it ironic?
**[10:06] U**
What you people have so desperately protected
**[10:10] U**
is my life itself.
**[10:13] Kag**
Gin-chan!
**[10:13] Shin**
Gin-san!
**[10:25] UB**
If someone gives you a present,
**[10:28] UB**
you really should take better care of it.
**[10:32] Kam**
But that wasn't our only trump card.
**[10:35] Kon**
If you put together the trump
cards of each of us here...
**[10:40] UB**
...we can kill you for good,
no matter how many times you revive.
**[10:44] UB**
Rejoice.
**[10:46] UB**
The monster dies today.
**[10:48] Shin**
G-Guys!
**[10:50] Kon**
Let's go, you louts!
**[10:54] Kon**
Take Utsuro's head!
**[10:58] U**
An all-out war?
**[11:02] U**
Are you...
**[11:05] G**
His eyes! Take him out
before his eyes recover!
**[11:08] U**
Are you that afraid
**[11:13] U**
of me?
**[11:19] Ymz**
*No way... He can see?*
**[11:22] U**
I'm used to losing my sight, you see.
**[11:27] U**
At one time, I even had my eyeballs
gouged out every day for decades.
**[11:35] U**
Within that profound darkness,
**[11:38] U**
you can feel things,
even if you can't see them.
**[12:19] U**
You said you will kill me for good,
no matter how many times I revive.
**[12:24] U**
But how many of your
friends will die by then?
**[12:32] U**
Oh?
**[12:37] Kon**
Got you now,
**[12:39] Kon**
Utsuro!
**[12:48] Kon**
Got you now,
**[12:50] Kon**
Utsuro!
**[12:51] Hij**
Kondo-san!
**[12:53] Kon**
I'm going to rip your heart out of that body.
**[12:59] Kon**
Have a good taste of my sword...
**[13:03] Kon**
The Shinsengumi's sword!
**[13:08] U**
You crushed my eyes and stabbed my heart.
**[13:12] U**
What will you come for next?
**[13:23] Gin**
Wait!
**[13:33] U**
That was pretty good.
**[13:36] U**
With that speed, you really
could take me out...
**[13:40] U**
You could have until a moment ago, that is.
**[13:47] G**
Vice Chief! Captain Okita!
**[13:50] Abu**
Fire!
**[13:52] Abu**
Riddle his body with crystallite bullets!
**[14:01] Abu**
Bullets that fly straight are easier
to evade than swaying blades.
**[14:07] Kam**
How about an idiot that
flies straight at you, then?
**[14:12] U**
It is as you see.
**[14:22] Kam**
That so?
**[14:24] Kam**
Then try dodging this,
**[14:27] Kam**
a shot fired by an idiot.
**[14:37] Kam**
If we can't kill you by skewering
or pumping holes into you,
**[14:42] Kam**
our only choice left is to
erase every last cell.
**[14:47] Kam**
It's too bad.
**[14:48] Kam**
Looks like you failed to
erase your shitty DNA.
**[14:53] Kam**
But he's...
**[15:00] UB**
Not yet!
**[15:01] UB**
He can come back to life
from just one hand, too!
**[15:05] UB**
Erase that arm!
**[15:07] Abu**
Over here, Commander!
**[15:12] Abu**
Fire!
**[15:14] UB**
* This thing could malfunction if*
* I fire back-to-back shots, but...*
**[15:20] UB**
This is our best chance!
**[15:29] UB**
*He sacrificed his own arm?*
**[15:46] UB**
Is that all you've got?
**[15:49] UB**
It's too bad.
**[15:50] UB**
It seems I am the only one who can kill me.
**[15:57] Shin**
Kagura-chan!
**[16:01] Shin**
*My body won't move!*
**[16:13] Abu**
Commander!
**[16:21] Kag**
Kamui!
**[16:23] Abu**
Get him!
**[16:43] Hij**
Kondo-san...
**[16:48] Gin**
Get up already!
**[17:07] Abu**
Wh-What the hell?
**[17:10] Abu**
Forget about the world ending or whatever.
**[17:14] Abu**
That beast will wipe us out all by himself.
**[17:41] U**
At last, a fine expression.
**[17:45] U**
That's just fine.
**[17:46] U**
All you people can do
**[17:49] U**
is cast your swords aside
**[17:52] U**
and accept death...
**[17:54] U**
Accept me.
**[18:07] (Flashback) ShinD**
A samurai's sword is not something
that is kept in a sheath.
**[18:13] (Flashback) ShinD**
It's something that you hold in your soul.
**[18:17] (Flashback) ShinD**
These days, samurai aren't needed.
**[18:22] (Flashback) ShinD**
But no matter how much times change, there
are things that people mustn't forget.
**[18:30] (Flashback) ShinD**
Shinpachi, Otae.
**[18:34] (Flashback) ShinD**
Even if there comes a time when
you must give up your sword,
**[18:39] (Flashback) ShinD**
you must never lose the unwavering
sword kept in your soul.
**[18:47] ShinD**
* Our father told us never to lose*
* our swords, come what may,*
**[18:53] ShinD**
*and died with his eyes still open wide.*
**[18:59] ShinD**
* Even when faced with death, he too kept*
* searching until his very last breath...*
**[19:13] ShinD**
*We weren't born to be ended!*
**[19:18] ShinD**
* It's for the things that*
* are endless and unchanging*
**[19:22] ShinD**
*that we live here right now!*
**[19:25] ShinD**
* I won't close my eyes*
* until the very last, either!*
**[19:29] ShinD**
*I won't let go of this sword!*
**[19:31] ShinD**
* Father, your sword still*
* lives strong within me...*
**[19:39] U**
That was a fine display of swordsmanship.
**[20:12] U**
Is that dog deity still at it?
**[20:22] Shin**
I finally got you.
**[20:25] Shin**
The countless swords that you broke
have led us here to this moment.
**[20:31] Shin**
We won't be broken anymore!
**[20:41] U**
There is still plenty of
Altana left within me.
**[20:45] U**
If he burns his entire life away, the ley
lines will spiral out of control again.
**[20:50] U**
Well, I suppose he might get
killed by someone before that.
**[20:55] U**
Either way,
**[21:00] U**
I have enough to make sure
the ending comes to pass.
**[21:08] Kag**
You can have an ending for
yourself all you want!
**[21:28] Gin**
Yo, good to see your recovery
isn't going too smoothly.
**[21:34] Gin**
Savor that feeling.
**[21:36] Gin**
The people you killed laid down their
lives to inflict those wounds upon you.
**[21:42] Gin**
You'd better not waste a single scratch.
**[21:46] U**
Fragments of the crystallite sword...
**[21:49] U**
You threw it at me back then
**[21:51] U**
in order to get it in my bloodstream?
**[21:55] Gin**
Not a single thing will go to waste.
**[21:58] Gin**
Our reason for fighting, our feelings,
**[22:02] Gin**
our regrets, and our hope...
**[22:06] Gin**
I'm going to etch it all into your body.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:44] Gin**
The creatures you know
of no longer exist here,
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Gin**
creature who fears humanity!
***SIGN*** The Creatures Known as Humanity
***SIGN*** Utsuro has lived an endless life,
***SIGN*** and he brings about endless death.
***SIGN*** With the end of the world approaching,
***SIGN*** people choose to burn their flame of life bright and strong!
# 361 - The Creatures Known as Humanity
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!!
**[00:07] (Flashback) Gin**
We would've made a whole bunch of money
if you hadn't gotten in my way there!
**[00:12] (Flashback) Shin**
What are you saying?
Don't ignore your own mistake!
**[00:14] (Flashback) Gin**
I didn't make any mistakes.
**[00:14] (Flashback) Kag**
Oh, Sadaharu. We're home.
**[00:16] (Flashback) Shin**
If that wasn't a mistake,
I don't know what is!
**[00:16] (Flashback) Kag**
Hey! Stop crying over spilled milk!
**[00:19] (Flashback) Gin**
Uh, it was your fault in the first place!
**[00:19] (Flashback) Shin**
Uh, it was your fault in the first place!
**[00:29] U**
You gave everything you have,
and made so many sacrifices,
**[00:34] U**
but what you've gained is
so trifling in comparison.
**[00:40] U**
All you've done is momentarily
strip me of my armor of immortality.
**[00:47] U**
Besides, as I'm sure you realize,
**[00:51] U**
your feeble flame of hope is already fading.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** The Creatures Known as Humanity
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[02:44] (Flashback) Shin**
Good morning!
**[02:46] (Flashback) Shin**
I'm sorry.
**[02:47] (Flashback) Shin**
Sis has a cold, which is why I'm a bit late.
**[02:51] (Flashback) Shin**
Good morning, Sadaharu.
**[02:54] (Flashback) Shin**
Oh, right.
**[02:57] (Flashback) Shin**
I'm home, Sadaharu.
**[03:09] (Flashback) Kag**
The rain got me good.
**[03:10] (Flashback) Kag**
I should've left sooner.
**[03:14] (Flashback) Kag**
I've always hated walking
home in this weather.
**[03:19] (Flashback) Kag**
Wet streets,
**[03:21] (Flashback) Kag**
and an empty home.
**[03:25] (Flashback) Kag**
This just brings back bad memories.
**[03:29] (Flashback) Kag**
Huh? Sadaharu?
**[03:33] (Flashback) Kag**
Where'd he run off to?
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[03:41] (Flashback) Kag**
I'm home.
**[03:43] (Flashback) Kag**
Uh, you just got here, too.
**[03:58] (Flashback) Gin**
I'm sick of puking.
**[04:00] (Flashback) Gin**
I keep saying I'll never drink again,
but this time I swear I'll stick to it.
**[04:06] (Flashback) Gin**
Crap, my head hurts like
it's being split open.
**[04:09] (Flashback) Gin**
It's like there's an elephant on my head.
**[04:11] (Flashback) Gin**
Oh, Sadaharu, help me out here.
**[04:14] (Flashback) Gin**
I drank too much, and I can't move.
**[04:16] (Flashback) Gin**
Take me inside, please.
**[04:19] (Flashback) Gin**
What's with that look?
**[04:21] (Flashback) Gin**
Why do you have to be so demanding?
**[04:23] (Flashback) Gin**
Relax. I did buy you something.
**[04:26] (Flashback) Gin**
Go get that bag.
**[04:29] (Flashback) Gin**
It's monja. Eat up.
**[04:31] (Flashback) Gin**
Ow! My headache got worse!
**[04:33] (Flashback) Gin**
And I can't see anything! Help, Sadaharu!
**[04:39] (Flashback) Gin**
Huh? I'm better now.
**[04:41] (Flashback) Gin**
I'm good now, Sadaharu.
**[04:43] (Flashback) Gin**
Thanks for your help.
**[04:46] (Flashback) Gin**
Also...
**[04:48] (Flashback) Gin**
I'm home.
**[05:15] Shin**
*Sadaharu, wait just a bit.*
**[05:21] Shin**
*Very soon,*
**[05:23] Shin**
*we'll come home to you.*
**[05:26] Shin**
*So please...*
**[05:33] Shin**
*Bark for us one more time.*
**[05:38] Shin**
*Welcome us home with a bark!*
**[05:49] U**
It's over.
**[05:53] U**
He died,
**[05:55] U**
and the dragon revived.
**[06:09] U**
You gave me a surprisingly hard time.
**[06:12] U**
However...
**[06:15] U**
Now, I can welcome the end of
the world with no resistance.
***SIGN*** Lake Toya
**[06:28] Gin**
Sadaharu...
**[06:48] U**
What is this?
**[06:49] Oto**
Good grief.
**[06:51] Oto**
How many more sacrifices will we have
to offer for our planet to calm down?
**[06:58] Cat**
Well, if we offer her a mutt and three
stooges, she might just return them.
**[07:04] Tae**
True.
**[07:05] Tae**
In that case,
**[07:07] Tae**
let's have her take all the lives she
wants from here until she's satisfied.
**[07:13] Gin**
Y-You guys...
**[07:16] Tae**
We won't make you guys
carry the burden alone.
**[07:20] Tae**
This is our planet.
**[07:25] Tae**
We'll fight together with you until the end.
**[07:28] Tae**
So don't give in, guys.
**[07:32] Tae**
You're not alone.
**[07:41] (Flashback) Nob**
Using life as a power source?
**[07:43] (Flashback) Ane**
Yes. Ordinary people can't
suppress ley lines like we can.
**[07:49] (Flashback) Ane**
But if we act as mediums, they could
convert their life energy into Zen power.
**[07:54] (Flashback) Mone**
That's absurd.
**[07:55] (Flashback) Mone**
We'd be making them carry
the fated duty of our clan.
**[08:00] (Flashback) Mone**
We'd be asking them to give up their
lives to suppress the ley lines here.
**[08:06] (Flashback) Mone**
Do you think he or the rest are
fighting out of some sense of duty?
**[08:17] (Flashback) Mone**
Komako!
**[08:19] (Flashback) Nob**
Yes.
**[08:21] (Flashback) Nob**
Even without a duty,
**[08:24] (Flashback) Nob**
they would surely stand there...
**[08:27] (Flashback) Nob**
Just to stand with their friends.
**[08:34] Ane**
Take it!
**[08:34] Mone**
Our power!
**[08:37] Bo**
Everyone's feelings!
**[08:47] U**
Who do you humans think you are?
**[08:55] Kyu**
Stop us if you can.
**[08:57] Kyu**
We will not take a single
step back from here!
**[09:02] Jir**
We've come this far together,
**[09:04] Jir**
so we'll go with you all the
way, be it to heaven or hell!
**[09:12] Tsu**
No matter how many times you revive,
**[09:14] Tsu**
we will keep standing back up!
**[09:17] Zen**
We won't let anyone else die!
**[09:19] Sac**
So guys, just one more time...
**[09:34] U**
Begone.
**[09:36] U**
Just how far will you take
your futile resistance?
**[09:39] U**
Humans, I know you better
than you know yourselves.
**[09:45] U**
You're foolish, cowardly,
cruel, and filthy creatures.
**[09:53] U**
Creatures that kept repeating their
mistakes, caused much suffering,
**[09:59] U**
and never stopped fearing me.
**[10:03] U**
Creatures that I have killed over and over.
**[10:11] U**
Creatures that I shall put an end to now...
**[10:15] U**
No, creatures that are already done for.
**[10:22] U**
*Yes.*
**[10:24] U**
*They should be done for by now.*
**[10:27] U**
*The humanity I know*
**[10:30] U**
*would've been afraid, given up, despaired,*
**[10:34] U**
*and everything would've been over already.*
**[10:38] U**
*But what is with these people?*
**[10:44] U**
*What is this emotion I'm feeling?*
**[10:50] Nob**
You're right.
**[10:53] Nob**
Humans are foolish, cowardly,
and cruel creatures.
**[10:59] Nob**
But there's one thing you're forgetting.
**[11:07] Nob**
Humans are creatures that
fight their own weakness.
**[11:12] Gin**
The creatures you know
of no longer exist here,
**[11:17] Gin**
creature who fears humanity!
**[11:22] U**
*Fear? Me?*
**[11:27] U**
*Fear humans?*
**[11:32] U**
*No, that is wrong.*
**[11:35] U**
*I simply don't understand*
**[11:38] U**
* the human who caused me,*
* who had always cursed people,*
**[11:41] U**
* to give birth to another*
* self that loved people.*
**[11:48] U**
*Why?*
**[11:51] U**
*You shouldn't be able to stand anymore.*
**[11:56] U**
*Your sword should've been broken forever.*
**[12:03] U**
*So why?*
**[12:14] U**
*Why do you still stand there?*
**[12:28] U**
*Why is it?*
**[12:37] U**
*I don't understand.*
**[12:51] U**
*I don't understand!*
**[13:07] U**
*No, I knew all along.*
**[13:12] U**
* That knowledge is what made*
* me want to get rid of him.*
**[13:23] U**
*Him, who could possibly erase even me.*
**[13:39] U**
*I know all too well...*
**[13:44] U**
*That boy,*
**[13:49] U**
*and how powerful humanity can be.*
**[14:17] U**
*To think that man was still a part of me...*
**[14:23] U**
* A mere fragment born to me as*
* I drifted through countless lives.*
**[14:29] U**
*But he has destroyed my eternity.*
**[14:34] U**
*I was the one who was a mere fragment, huh?*
**[14:50] Hat**
Brother!
**[14:51] Mad**
Hang in there!
**[14:54] Shi**
This is bad.
**[14:55] Shi**
At this rate, the Flame of
Kagutsuchi's energy will...
**[14:58] Shi**
I-Is there nothing we can do?
**[15:02] Han**
Now, I could get through the security,
access the Heavenly Bird's central systems,
**[15:07] Han**
and maybe get that energy under control.
**[15:10] Sho**
Hankai!
**[15:11] Shi**
Wh-What are our chances of success?
**[15:14] Han**
You're better off not knowing.
**[15:16] Han**
But as long as it's not zero
percent, it isn't impossible.
**[15:19] Han**
We still have hope.
**[15:23] Sho**
I never thought I'd hear those
words come out of your mouth.
**[15:28] Sak**
No matter how it turns out,
**[15:31] Sak**
our destination remains the same.
**[15:33] Kat**
Earth or hell, it makes no difference.
**[15:38] Shi**
You two...
**[15:40] Sak**
Wherever it is, they...
**[15:43] Kat**
They'll be standing there, waiting for us.
**[16:10] Shin**
What is that?
**[16:11] Kag**
A spaceship?
**[16:14] U**
Humans.
**[16:17] U**
This isn't the end.
**[16:21] U**
You have gone and chosen...
**[16:26] U**
An endless war,
**[16:29] U**
and a life dyed in sorrow and suffering.
**[16:36] U**
Nobody can put an end to it for you anymore.
**[16:42] U**
There is nobody who can
save you people anymore.
**[16:55] U**
One day, you will truly understand,
**[16:59] U**
Shoyo's student...
**[17:07] U**
You couldn't save Shoyo.
**[17:13] U**
Nobody can save your teacher anymore.
**[21:46] Shin**
*The land of the samurai.*
**[21:48] Shin**
* There was a time, long ago, when our*
* country was called by that name.*
**[21:52] Shin**
* The skies over Edo, which the samurai*
* laid their lives down to defend,*
**[21:56] Shin**
* are again filled with ships*
* from strange worlds.*
**[21:59] Shin**
* The streets of Edo, which the samurai*
* laid their lives down to defend,*
**[22:03] Shin**
* are again filled with swaggering,*
* arrogant aliens.*
**[22:13] Shin**
*Two years since that fateful day...*
**[22:15] Shin**
*Even as it bore the scars of war,*
**[22:18] Shin**
* Edo was slowly, but surely, returning*
* to the city it used to be.*
**[22:25] Manager**
I told you that's not the one!
**[22:28] Manager**
Nowadays, even a golden retriever
can handle the register!
**[22:32] Manager**
You're human! You've been
working here for a month!
**[22:35] Manager**
Why can't you do this?!
**[22:37] Manager**
You moron!
**[22:40] Manager**
You remind me of another good-for-nothing
kid who used to work here.
**[22:44] Ama**
Just leave it at that, boss.
**[22:47] Ama**
Hey, kid, don't you bother with the
register. Just get me some milk.
**[22:51] Kid**
R-Right away.
**[22:54] Manager**
S-Sir, you mustn't go so easy on him.
**[22:58] Ama**
It's just, whenever I see a samurai these
days, I feel kind of sorry for them.
**[23:04] Ama**
This country's resources were completely
depleted in the war two years ago,
**[23:07] Ama**
and it can't even feed its people anymore.
**[23:10] Ama**
The way they suck up to everyone to live
makes them look like dead men walking.
**[23:15] Ama**
When I see them like that...
**[23:17] Kid**
Thanks for waiting.
**[23:20] Ama**
I want to extend not only
a hand, but also a leg!
**[23:28] Shin**
Uh, excuse me.
**[23:36] Ama**
What is wrong with you?!
**[23:37] Ama**
Are you aware that we are
Chatoran ambassadors?!
**[23:41] Shin**
Blah, blah, blah.
**[23:43] Shin**
Could you keep it down?
**[23:48] Shin**
Are you in heat or something?
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Next week onward,
***SIGN*** the story jumps to two years later...
***SIGN*** How have they survived since then,
***SIGN*** and what lives are they leading now...
# 362 - Sign
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] Shin**
Uh, excuse me.
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!!
**[00:12] Ama**
What is wrong with you?!
**[00:14] Shin**
Blah, blah, blah.
**[00:17] Shin**
Could you keep it down?
**[00:20] Shin**
Are you in heat or something?
**[00:22] Shin**
I can't enjoy *Terakado Tsu Best Of:
Shinpachi Edition* with all this noise.
**[00:27] Shin**
You're being a nuisance. Get out at once.
**[00:31] Shin**
I can't ignore boys like him.
**[00:35] Shin**
Why?
**[00:37] Shin**
Because I was him once.
**[00:39] Shin**
So you can grow strong, too!
**[00:42] Manager**
No fighting in my café, you pieces of shit!
**[00:47] Manager**
Mosuke, you okay?
**[00:48] Manager**
How dare you beat up my son?! He's finally
got out of his room and started working!
**[00:54] Manager**
I don't care if you're big shots on some planet!
**[00:57] Manager**
This is our country! This is my café!
**[01:00] Manager**
I won't let you act like you
own the place anymore,
**[01:02] Manager**
you stupid Spectacalien!
**[01:04] Manager**
Out with you!
**[01:06] Manager**
And don't ever come back!
**[01:11] Ama**
Curse you, Earthling!
**[01:13] Ama**
You'll pay for this!
You've started a diplomatic dispute!
**[01:16] Ama**
Let's go!
**[01:26] Shin**
You've built a fine café, boss.
**[01:31] Shin**
Huh?
**[01:32] Shin**
That's weird. I can't see.
**[01:34] Shin**
Are these tears of joy?
**[01:37] Shin**
*I should've known I couldn't do what he did.*
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
**[02:56] Shin**
* What would he say if he saw*
* what Edo has become now?*
**[03:01] Shin**
*Everyone's grown stronger.*
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[03:03] Shin**
*Everyone's much tougher.*
**[03:09] Shin**
I'm the only one still whimpering
just like always, Gin-san.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Sign
**[03:35] (Flashback) Kag**
Gin-chan, get on your feet already.
**[03:37] (Flashback) Shin**
Gin-san!
**[03:43] (Flashback) Gin**
I know.
**[03:47] (Flashback) Gin**
This isn't the time or place to die.
**[03:51] (Flashback) Gin**
Can't let this be the end.
**[03:54] (Flashback) Gin**
We haven't done a single thing yet.
**[04:02] Shin**
*That day, we died along with Earth...*
**[04:19] Shin**
*and were reborn together, maybe.*
**[04:26] (Flashback) Shin**
We won, but it sure doesn't look like it.
**[04:29] (Flashback) Gin**
There are no victors in war.
**[04:33] (Flashback) Gin**
Everyone's a loser.
**[04:36] (Flashback) Gin**
Hup.
***SIGN*** Gin-chan
***SIGN*** Sugar Content
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[04:38] (Flashback) Gin**
Talk about a mess.
***SIGN*** Snack Otose
**[04:41] (Flashback) Gin**
Can it go back to normal?
**[04:44] (Flashback) Shin**
I don't know. Some things may,
**[04:48] (Flashback) Shin**
but some things won't.
**[05:00] (Flashback) Shin**
Ane-san and Mone-san said they
don't know when he'll wake up.
**[05:06] (Flashback) Kag**
Dog deities exist on every planet, right?
**[05:10] (Flashback) Kag**
We might find a way to wake
him up on another planet.
**[05:15] (Flashback) Kag**
I've decided.
**[05:17] (Flashback) Kag**
And I've talked to Daddy and the others, too.
**[05:20] (Flashback) Shin**
Then we'll go with...
**[05:21] (Flashback) Kag**
I'm not taking you.
**[05:23] (Flashback) Kag**
I don't want the help of guys who abandon
their broken-down planet to come with me.
**[05:29] (Flashback) Shin**
Kagura-chan...
**[05:34] (Flashback) Gin**
Do you know why I started Odd Jobs?
**[05:39] (Flashback) Gin**
Long story short, it was
because I had nothing to do.
**[05:43] (Flashback) Gin**
There was nothing I wanted to do,
so I decided to do anything.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[05:48] (Flashback) Gin**
Messed up, right?
**[05:50] (Flashback) Gin**
I'm amazed I came this far when
I started it for such a flimsy reason.
**[05:54] (Flashback) Gin**
As like-minded people gathered here,
**[05:57] (Flashback) Gin**
I lost my chance to quit.
**[06:00] (Flashback) Shin**
Where's this coming from?
**[06:01] (Flashback) Shin**
You don't often talk about the past.
**[06:04] (Flashback) Gin**
So I decided that if they ever found
something they really needed to do,
**[06:10] (Flashback) Gin**
I'd take down this sign and close up shop.
**[06:16] (Flashback) Gin**
And I've found something I need to do, too.
**[06:21] (Flashback) Gin**
Shinpachi, it's crunch time.
**[06:24] (Flashback) Gin**
What do you want to do?
**[06:27] (Flashback) Shin**
I...
**[06:30] Kid**
Hey, hey!
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan Shimura Shinpachi
**[06:32] Kid**
What's with this "Odd Jobs Gin-chan"?
**[06:36] Kid**
I mean, your name's Shimura Shinpachi, right?
**[06:39] Kid**
So what's with the Gin-chan?
**[06:42] Shin**
He's gone now.
**[06:46] Shin**
But...
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[06:48] Shin**
Without him, there wouldn't be an Odd Jobs...
**[06:52] Shin**
Or today's Edo, probably.
**[06:54] Shin**
And me.
**[06:57] Shin**
So I want to make sure
people don't forget him.
**[07:02] Kid**
Wait, are you talking about the hero?
**[07:06] Shin**
Nah, that's not his style.
**[07:09] Kid**
My dad said the bakufu brass
are trying to hog the glory,
**[07:14] Kid**
but they're all fakes.
**[07:16] Kid**
And that *he* was the one who protected us.
***SIGN*** Perofessional
***SIGN*** The Way of the Samurai
***SIGN*** The Last Samurai
**[07:23] Nar**
Everyone thought that
species had gone extinct.
**[07:29] G**
If it weren't for him,
the universe might've died out, right?
**[07:33] G**
It was amazing.
**[07:35] G**
One word from him was enough to get
both allies and enemies on the same page.
**[07:39] G**
This is what you call him
on your planet, right?
**[07:41] G**
The samurai "Man Against Dying All Out,"
**[07:45] G**
or MADAO for short?
***SIGN*** Hasegawa Taizo
**[07:48] Nar**
The camera takes a close look at the life
of the last samurai, who saved Earth.
**[07:53] Nar**
An army of millions attacked,
***SIGN*** Reenactment by the man himself
**[07:56] Nar**
but he held them off all on his own.
**[07:59] Nar**
That strength.
***SIGN*** Strength
**[08:00] Nar**
Surrounded by enemies on all sides...
**[08:02] Mad**
O-Ow! They're actually hitting me, Director!
**[08:05] Nar**
But with one word, he won them over.
**[08:07] Nar**
That charisma.
***SIGN*** Charisma
**[08:10] Nar**
A massive piece of despair came flying
toward us, but he took it on by himself.
**[08:14] Nar**
That courage.
***SIGN*** Courage
**[08:15] Mad**
Pull it up a bit higher!
***SIGN*** This is too heavy!
**[08:17] Nar**
As we analyze his abilities,
**[08:20] Nar**
we also take apart his shades.
**[08:22] Mad**
Hey! What are you doing?!
**[08:24] Mad**
"Hero"? "The Last Samurai"?
**[08:27] Mad**
Honestly, none of them feel right.
**[08:30] Mad**
I'm all of them and none
of them at the same time.
**[08:33] Mad**
I can be dyed in any color you want.
***SIGN*** Unemployment
**[08:36] Mad**
That's unemployment.
***SIGN*** The Way of the Samurai Special
***SIGN*** Airing Soon
**[08:37] Nar**
Perofessional: The Way of the
Samurai Special, airing soon!
**[08:42] Shin**
Sis, I'm home.
**[08:45] Tae**
Oh, welcome back, Shin-chan.
**[08:47] Tae**
I was just thinking it was time
to kill the TV and get dinner.
**[08:51] Shin**
Uh, that's how Frieza-sama kills things.
**[08:55] Shin**
Let him have his fun.
**[08:57] Shin**
Hasegawa-san did his best, too.
**[08:59] Tae**
Shin-chan... We all worked
together to protect Edo.
**[09:04] Tae**
I can't and won't stand for
anyone belittling our efforts.
**[09:08] Tae**
Besides, I wanna sock him
because he pisses me off.
**[09:11] Shin**
What happened to our efforts?!
**[09:13] Tae**
If I'm being subtle, I hate old men who
dress like EX*LE and don't act their age.
**[09:21] Tae**
But I do like High & Low.
**[09:22] Shin**
That was so unsubtle, the rising sun's
shining through that thin veil!
**[09:26] Tae**
Also, I've heard that he goes around
partying for free, calling himself the hero.
**[09:33] Shin**
Where'd you get that information, Sis?
**[09:36] Shin**
Didn't you quit that lifestyle?
**[09:39] Tae**
These two years didn't
just give birth to heroes.
**[09:42] Tae**
Where there is light,
there is always a shadow.
**[09:48] Shin**
Where'd those Zarbon-san and
Dodoria-san cabaret girls come from?!
**[09:51] Tae**
Carry out Plan Omega.
**[09:53] Tae**
Bring judgment down
upon the corrupted hero.
**[09:57] Bo**
Whee!
**[09:57] Shin**
Whee, my ass! What's with that
hellish group of cabaret girls?!
**[10:01] Kon**
Good grief.
**[10:03] Kon**
I see the Queen of the Kabuki
District is still alive and well.
**[10:08] Shin**
Kondo-san.
**[10:09] Kon**
Sorry I'm late. The hotpot is finally done.
**[10:14] Shin**
Sorry to always make you do this.
**[10:17] Kon**
Nah, it's fine.
**[10:19] Kon**
I am going to be a stay-at-home
dad soon, after all.
**[10:22] Kon**
Besides, Otae-san needs a balanced
and nutritious diet right now.
**[10:27] Kon**
Worrying about the others is fine,
**[10:30] Kon**
but you also need to think
about your new path.
**[10:35] Tae**
I-I know.
**[10:37] Shin**
Hasegawa-san was a shocker,
but you weren't far behind.
***SIGN*** Resignation
***SIGN*** Special Police
Shinsengumi
**[10:42] Kon**
I'd be lying if I said it was an easy decision.
**[10:45] Kon**
But both roles, Shinsengumi and father,
require you to stake your life on them.
**[10:51] Kon**
I've lived my life for the sword so far,
**[10:53] Kon**
and I want to live for family from now on.
**[10:57] Shin**
Is that so?
**[10:59] Shin**
Sorry, but I'm feeling a little sleepy.
**[11:02] Shin**
You two eat without me.
**[11:05] Kon**
Shinpachi-kun?
**[11:07] Shin**
*Everyone's walking down a new path in life.*
**[11:11] Shin**
*But I alone...*
***SIGN*** Snack Otose
**[11:16] Oto**
Man, who would've thought those two
would have a shotgun wedding?
**[11:21] Oto**
We senior citizens don't even get
any extra wrinkles at this point,
**[11:25] Oto**
but the passage of time is terrifying.
**[11:27] Cat**
What are you saying, Otose-san?
**[11:30] Cat**
You do have extra wrinkles
at the corners of your eyes.
**[11:33] Cat**
That's hilarious!
**[11:34] Shin**
Um, Catherine-san, did your face
get run over by a time machine?
**[11:38] Cat**
The passage of time isn't
what's causing all this.
**[11:42] Cat**
It's the final episode.
**[11:45] Cat**
Lately, as the final episode draws near,
**[11:48] Cat**
characters have suddenly
started forming couples,
***SIGN*** Final Episode: Final Fantasy Phenomenon
(Mating)
**[11:51] Cat**
in what's called the Final Fantasy Phenomenon.
**[11:54] Oto**
What the hell?
**[11:55] Oto**
Will we be paired off with some randos, too?!
**[12:00] Cat**
I'm so scared, I can't sleep!
**[12:02] Shin**
Hey! Someone bring me a Delorean!
**[12:04] Gen**
Shut up, you hags!
**[12:06] Gen**
Instead of final fantasying with you two,
**[12:09] Gen**
men would much rather dragon quest alone!
***SIGN*** Dragon Quest
Appeasing the Pants Dragon
**[12:11] Shin**
That's what DQ meant?!
**[12:13] Cat**
Don't talk to us! What if that
sets a flag, you geezer?!
**[12:17] Oto**
But I was sure she was in love
with Gintoki, you know.
**[12:22] Shin**
Stop that! That's gross!
**[12:23] Oto**
I wonder if she final fantasy'd after he
treated her nicely when she was lonely.
**[12:28] Cat**
Those final fantasies are the ones that
tend to work out best, surprisingly.
**[12:33] Oto**
They do say it's final fantasier
for girls to be loved than love.
**[12:37] Shin**
No, they don't!
**[12:38] Shin**
You two just want to keep
saying final fantasy, huh?
**[12:41] Oto**
What's wrong with you?
We're trying to cheer you up here!
**[12:43] Oto**
Then show us the wedding photos.
**[12:46] Oto**
Show us the photos of the
gorilla and female gorilla.
**[12:49] Oto**
Show the goods!
**[12:51] CaT**
Show the goods!
**[12:53] Shin**
Here.
**[12:57] Oto**
Otae sure has grown in size in the
short while I haven't seen her.
**[13:00] Shin**
That's a gorilla.
**[13:02] Cat**
But over here...
**[13:03] Shin**
That's a gorilla.
**[13:05] Shin**
It was a political marriage.
**[13:07] Shin**
He's been cooking for us to get some
househusband training as part of his stalking.
**[13:13] Shin**
And it was surprisingly good.
**[13:15] Shin**
She gained tons of weight.
**[13:17] Shin**
But she still couldn't stop.
**[13:19] Shin**
It was a samurai's mercy.
**[13:21] Shin**
Flags and foreshadowing don't matter.
**[13:24] Shin**
Neither do species, age gap, gender,
or whether you recognize them or not.
**[13:30] Shin**
That's the Gintama anime's final fantasy.
**[13:35] Tam**
I finally found you.
**[13:37] Tam**
I've been looking all over.
**[13:42] Tam**
Papa!
**[13:44] Shin**
*It's happening!*
**[13:46] Shin**
*Final fantasy has bared its fangs at me, too!*
**[13:58] Tam**
Papa!
**[14:00] Oto**
Sh-Shinpachi...
**[14:02] Cat**
Don't tell me you...
**[14:04] Shin**
You've got it all wrong!
**[14:05] Shin**
This is a trap that final fantasy's
trying to stick me in!
**[14:08] Cat**
Don't play dumb!
You're the one who stuck it in!
**[14:11] Shin**
T-To begin with, isn't it weird that I'd
have a kid this old in just two years?
**[14:16] Tam**
Weird?
**[14:17] Tam**
Am I weird, Papa?
**[14:19] Tam**
Is that why you can't be my papa?
**[14:23] Shin**
Uh, th-that's not it!
**[14:25] Cat**
You're the worst!
**[14:26] Shin**
Again, you're wrong!
**[14:27] Cat**
Give us proof, then! Prove your innocence!
**[14:31] Shin**
Uh, well...
**[14:35] Shin**
I'm a virgin.
**[14:38] Shin**
I gradually changed my hair part so
people wouldn't notice my new look,
**[14:43] Shin**
but my lower half is still drinking Ramune
at a candy store with a crew cut.
**[14:47] Oto**
Yeah, we knew.
**[14:48] Shin**
Then why'd you make me say it?!
**[14:49] Cat**
It pissed us off that you're side-parting
your hair as a cherry boy.
**[14:52] Shin**
Fine! I'll get a crew cut up here too, then!
**[14:55] Tam**
Mama! This guy's a cherry!
**[14:58] Shin**
Hey! Even a child knows my dirty secret now!
**[15:01] Tam**
Hey, Mama. What's a cherry?
**[15:04] Kin**
A cherry is one who's abandoned
their duty to propagate.
**[15:10] Kin**
A piece of junk, in other words.
**[15:11] Kin**
Add that to your data.
**[15:14] Kin**
And as I keep telling you,
this isn't your Mama.
**[15:17] Kin**
She's you. Add that, too.
**[15:20] Tam**
Understood.
**[15:22] Shin**
Tama-san... Kin-san...
**[15:24] Gen**
Oh, there you are.
**[15:27] Gen**
The Fuyo Number Zero's mini
version, AKA Tamako.
**[15:30] Gen**
She contains a part of Tama,
which I copied into her.
**[15:34] Gen**
Everything she sees while Tama's in sleep
mode will become Tama's memories.
**[15:39] Shin**
So Tama-san's been that way since then?
**[15:42] Gen**
Yeah.
**[15:43] Gen**
I mean, she's a special model built by the
robotics science genius, Hayashi Ryuzan.
**[15:48] Gen**
I can't tell just which screws
she's missing or what.
**[15:52] Gen**
But I just don't have the
heart to leave her like this.
**[15:57] Shin**
Gengai-san...
**[15:58] Gen**
We're still better off than most, you know.
**[16:02] Gen**
After all, Edo still has Odd Jobs
to help in times of need.
**[16:10] Shin**
* I still ended up having to walk around*
* looking like a real father.*
**[16:15] Shin**
Anyway, what does Gengai-san want from me?
**[16:17] Tam**
To show me all sorts of things while Fuyo
Number Zero is asleep, Papa-sama.
**[16:23] Shin**
Don't call me Papa-sama.
**[16:25] Tam**
I apologize for earlier.
**[16:27] Tam**
That was a plan to leech
free oil from you people
**[16:31] Tam**
upon Kintoki-sama's suggestion, Cherry-sama.
**[16:34] Shin**
Could you not call me Cherry?!
**[16:36] Tam**
But he also said that you would
definitely take on this request.
**[16:41] (Flashback) Kin**
After all, the Odd Jobs is a group of perverts
who always keep one loli around.
**[16:46] Shin**
What the hell does he see Odd Jobs as?!
**[16:49] Tam**
But despite bashing you people, everyone
sounds somewhat lonely doing it...
**[16:55] Tam**
I heard you disbanded. What was the reason?
**[16:59] Shin**
Add this to your data:
**[17:00] Shin**
One does not ask questions like that to
someone they've met for the first time.
**[17:04] Tam**
Then what are the chances of
Odd Jobs making a comeback?
**[17:07] Shin**
Were you listening to me?
**[17:10] Shin**
None, probably.
**[17:12] Tam**
Why is that?
**[17:14] Shin**
Because they found other
things they needed to do.
**[17:17] Tam**
Did you stay back in Edo because
you didn't have anything like that?
**[17:25] (Flashback) Gin**
Shinpachi,
**[17:27] (Flashback) Gin**
is there anything you want to do?
**[17:32] Shin**
I had something.
**[17:33] Shin**
Helping rebuild the town,
**[17:36] Shin**
swordsmanship training,
**[17:37] Shin**
Otsu-chan fanclub activities,
**[17:40] Shin**
and...
**[17:42] (Flashback) Shin**
Bring back Father's dojo!
**[17:44] (Flashback) Gin**
Wow, you've got a bunch.
**[17:47] (Flashback) Shin**
Yes, so I'll be fine.
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[17:52] (Flashback) Shin**
You can go.
**[18:11] (Flashback) Gin**
Later.
**[18:19] Shin**
I had lots of things
I needed and wanted to do,
**[18:26] Shin**
so why am I stuck doing this?
**[18:33] Cop**
You there.
**[18:34] Cop**
Do you have a moment?
**[18:37] Cop**
Are you two siblings?
**[18:39] Shin**
Well, no, we're kinda like friends.
**[18:42] Cop**
Hmm...
**[18:43] Cop**
Could you breathe into this, please?
**[18:45] Shin**
Huh? I haven't been drinking, though.
**[18:50] Cop**
Ah, you're over the legal limit.
**[18:53] Cop**
See it?
**[18:54] Cop**
When the reading goes past this point,
**[18:57] Cop**
you're a virgin.
**[18:58] Shin**
What are you even checking?!
**[19:00] Cop**
Put under arrest at 1:20 PM
for illegal loli possession.
**[19:03] Shin**
Wait! You've gotta be kidding me!
**[19:06] Shin**
Somebody help!
**[19:08] Nob**
Hold it.
**[19:13] Nob**
Do you realize who that is?
**[19:17] Cops**
C-Commissioner-General!
**[19:19] Shin**
Commissioner?
**[19:21] Nob**
He's one of the heroes
who saved this country.
**[19:24] Nob**
Not someone you rookies can punish.
**[19:32] Nob**
You can either commit seppuku
**[19:34] Nob**
or get cut to pieces by the
Commissioner-General of Police, Imai Nobume.
**[19:38] Nob**
Make your choice, lolicon trash.
**[19:43] Soyo**
While we've entered a new age,
Edo is still beholden to old conventions.
**[19:49] Soyo**
I want to make the coming era one where
women can be independent and shine.
**[19:56] Soyo**
And by becoming the first
female Commissioner-General,
**[20:00] Soyo**
Nobume-san is laying the foundation for that.
**[20:04] Soyo**
What do you think, Shinpachi-san?
**[20:05] Soyo**
The new government's police force
seems trustworthy, does it not?
**[20:08] Shin**
Princess Soyo, may I say something?
**[20:11] Shin**
I really want to call 911 right now.
**[20:16] Soyo**
Um, I don't understand what you're saying.
**[20:19] Shin**
Isn't it obvious, you natural-born sadist?!
**[20:22] Nob**
Tamako gave me the gist of the story.
**[20:24] Nob**
As a token of apology,
**[20:25] Nob**
I've hired Odd Jobs to clean the windows.
**[20:28] Shin**
This disaster's supposed to be an apology?!
**[20:30] Shin**
And all that aside, Nobume-san,
**[20:31] Shin**
I thought you weren't the kind
of person who'd cling to power!
**[20:34] Nob**
I have no interest in power,
**[20:36] Nob**
but I can't leave the princess alone.
**[20:39] Shin**
But look at you, enjoying that power!
**[20:42] Nob**
While Utsuro's plan was foiled,
**[20:44] Nob**
the bakufu's old, wily foxes are still around.
**[20:48] Nob**
One misstep, and this country
will start crumbling down again.
**[20:51] Nob**
The princess really needs a sneaky,
twisted advisor right now.
**[20:57] Nob**
I'll deal with this uncomfortable
chair for a while.
**[21:01] Soyo**
Thank you, Nobume-san.
**[21:04] Shin**
Uh, what happened to the Shinsengumi?
**[21:08] Shin**
Weren't they the ones on track
to climb the ladder first?
**[21:11] Mat**
True.
**[21:13] Mat**
Their swords did carve open
a path to this new era.
**[21:16] Mat**
But swords that are too sharp
**[21:19] Mat**
are always scorned in times of peace.
**[21:22] Shin**
Lord Matsudaira!
**[21:26] Shin**
What is this?
**[21:27] Mat**
A summary of the new government's
orders for the Shinsengumi.
***SIGN*** Hijikata Toshiro
**[21:33] Shin**
Hijikata Toshiro...
**[21:35] Shin**
Demoted?!
***SIGN*** Saito Shimaru
**[21:36] Shin**
Saito Shimaru...
**[21:38] Shin**
Resigned?!
***SIGN*** Okita Sogo
**[21:40] Shin**
Okita Sogo...
**[21:42] Shin**
Seppuku?!
**[21:44] Mat**
It's ironic.
**[21:47] Mat**
The Shinsengumi was cast aside by the
terrifying man chosen by this new age.
***SIGN*** Live Assembly Broadcast
***SIGN*** Live Assembly Broadcast
**[21:54] Mat**
He suddenly showed up in the political world,
***SIGN*** Introductory Speech by the Prime Minister
**[21:56] Mat**
gained immense power in the blink of an eye,
**[21:59] Mat**
and went on to change politics itself!
**[22:04] Speaker**
It's time for the opening comments by the
first prime minister, Donald Zuramp-kun.
**[22:09] Kat**
I'm not Zuramp!
**[22:11] Kat**
I'm Katsura!
**[22:14] Shin**
Oh, this country's doomed.
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Gin**
I don't remember anything
like that ever being here.
***SIGN*** Specter
***SIGN*** Zuramp was appointed the first-ever prime minister!!
***SIGN*** Among serious concern for the country's future,
***SIGN*** Gintoki, who has left Edo,
***SIGN*** arrives at a certain place...
# 363 - Specter
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Specter
**[01:39] G**
It's time for the opening comments by the
first prime minister, Donald Zuramp-kun.
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!!
**[01:44] Kat**
I'm not Zuramp!
**[01:46] Kat**
I'm Katsura!
**[01:50] Kat**
Oh, my mistake.
**[01:52] Kat**
I meant that not in the sense
of a name, but as in a wig.
**[01:57] Kat**
I wanted to go public with it before
*Bunshun* caught wind of it.
**[02:01] Kat**
I am the first prime minister
of Japan, Donald Zuramp.
**[02:06] Kat**
I stand here and speak as
your representative today,
**[02:09] Kat**
but I'm just an ordinary human who
eats, poops, and sleeps like you all.
**[02:15] Kat**
*We stand at the precipice of a new era.*
**[02:19] Kat**
*Our last two shoguns once said,*
**[02:23] Kat**
*"Our country no longer needs a shogun."*
**[02:25] Kat**
* And indeed, from now on,*
* every person in this country*
**[02:30] Kat**
*will be a tiny king standing on this podium.*
**[02:34] Kat**
* We cannot waste what they protected*
* until their dying breaths.*
**[02:39] Kat**
*Within each and every one's hearts, they...*
**[02:42] Kat**
*Our kings still live on!*
**[02:45] Kat**
When the countless kings across the
country join hands and become one,
**[02:49] Kat**
our sad past will turn into
a source of pride for us!
**[02:52] Kat**
That wasn't the day our country
was reduced to rubble!
**[02:56] Kat**
It was the day our country was reborn!
**[03:04] G**
Hey, look!
**[03:05] G**
No!
**[03:09] G**
You're a crook warping the history books.
**[03:11] G**
This is divine punishment!
**[03:13] Kat**
Given that, I would like to
establish some new rules.
***SIGN*** Constitution of Japan
**[03:18] Kat**
And by that, I mean a constitution.
***SIGN*** Constitution of Japan
**[03:22] Kat**
We'll be working on it together from now on,
**[03:24] Kat**
but I've already put down the basic stuff.
**[03:27] Kat**
It'll be distributed as a supplement
with *Jump*, *Sunday*, and *Magazine.*
**[03:28] G**
Didn't he get stabbed just now?
**[03:29] G**
I'm pretty sure he did.
**[03:29] Kat**
Make sure you all check it out.
**[03:31] G**
Was that an assassin?
**[03:32] G**
Donald Zuramp!
**[03:34] G**
Divine judgment upon the
con man ruining this country!
**[03:39] Kat**
The journey we're about to
start will be endlessly long!
**[03:43] Kat**
But if we all work together,
we will definitely reach our goals!
**[03:49] Kat**
So please, everyone...
**[03:57] Kat**
I'm not going to reject you or your beliefs.
**[04:00] Kat**
However, true divine punishment
is much harsher.
**[04:07] Kat**
You're fired!
**[04:12] Mat**
I see. So it ended in failure.
**[04:15] Mat**
Don't worry about it.
We'll have plenty more chances.
**[04:20] Mat**
Well, there you have it.
**[04:22] Shin**
Uh, were you just orchestrating an
assassination of the prime minister?
**[04:25] Mat**
What kind of moron entrusts the
country to an ex-terrorist?
**[04:29] Shin**
But don't you kind of owe him your life?
**[04:32] Shin**
Back when you were imprisoned
on Kokujo Island...
**[04:35] (Flashback) Kat**
I hope you understand what
this means, Matsudaira.
**[04:38] (Flashback) Kat**
What I'm trying to open here
is the door to a new era.
**[04:43] (Flashback) Kat**
If we escape this island and eventually
reach a stage where we rebuild the nation...
**[04:50] (Flashback) Mat**
Okay, okay. I'll talk you up to the bakufu
or the new government or whatever.
**[04:56] (Flashback) Mat**
If we're still alive.
*Only* if we're still alive.
**[05:01] Mat**
I was sure he'd die at some point.
**[05:05] Shin**
Wait, you're the one who brought that
monster prime minister into power?!
**[05:08] Shin**
It's basically your fault the
Shinsengumi was dismantled!
**[05:12] Mat**
On that note...
**[05:14] Mat**
Have you ever killed a man?
**[05:17] Shin**
Like hell I'd do it!
**[05:18] Shin**
What the hell are you trying
to make me an accomplice in?!
**[05:21] Mat**
You only have two options:
***SIGN*** Kill
**[05:23] Mat**
Kill, or take a life.
***SIGN*** Take a life
**[05:25] Shin**
They're both murder!
**[05:27] Soy**
Katakuriko, that's enough.
**[05:31] Soy**
I see he still remembers.
**[05:35] Soy**
"Our kings still live on," huh?
**[05:40] Soy**
Right.
**[05:41] Soy**
I'm sure he'll build a wonderful country.
**[05:45] Soy**
Just you watch.
**[05:51] Sak**
*I see. Zura's the prime minister?*
**[05:54] Sak**
* Looks like Edo's goin' ta become*
* an even more fun place now!*
**[05:58] Shin**
It's no laughing matter, Sakamoto-san.
**[06:01] Tam**
I'll add this to my data:
**[06:03] Tam**
"Shinpachi-sama quit Odd Jobs
**[06:06] Tam**
and switched to being an assassin."
**[06:07] Shin**
Quit saying such disturbing things!
**[06:09] Shin**
I'll dismantle you!
**[06:10] Tam**
But you already took the money
and came to the meeting place.
**[06:15] Shin**
I-I'm here to stop them, obviously!
**[06:17] (Flashback) Mat**
The princess is saying that,
but I've already made preparations.
**[06:21] (Flashback) Mat**
I arranged for a dangerous weapon
and a first-rate assassin.
**[06:25] (Flashback) Mat**
Go to the pier, receive the weapon
from the black market dealer,
**[06:28] (Flashback) Mat**
and meet up with the rest of the team.
**[06:30] Shin**
Help me out here, Sakamoto-san!
**[06:33] Shin**
You're the only one who can stop Katsura-san!
**[06:36] Sak**
Unfortunately, I'm a bit occupied right now.
**[06:40] Sak**
I'm on this ship called Espoir,
**[06:43] Sak**
walkin' across an iron beam
to try to win a fortune.
**[06:46] Shin**
*So you're bankrupt?!*
**[06:48] Sak**
Help me out here, Shinpachi-kun.
**[06:50] Sak**
You're the only one who can save me...
**[06:53] Shin**
*I'm the one calling for help!*
**[06:55] Sak**
Fine. I'll send some help your way.
**[06:59] Sak**
I'm pretty sure Mutsu is
on Earth for some wor—
**[07:05] Tam**
I'll add this to my data:
**[07:07] Tam**
Kaientai Captain Sakamoto Tatsuma, dead.
**[07:10] Shin**
Don't jinx him!
**[07:12] BMD**
Hey.
**[07:14] BMD**
You the recipient for the goods?
**[07:19] Shin**
*The dealer?*
**[07:20] Shin**
N-No, I'm...
**[07:21] Tam**
Yes. From murder to arms smuggling,
Odd Jobs will do everything.
**[07:25] Shin**
Hey!
**[07:26] Tam**
Did I say something wrong?
**[07:29] Shin**
I told you, I'm here to stop the plot!
**[07:29] BMD**
Boss, they're arguing about something.
**[07:31] Mut**
Doesn't matter.
**[07:32] Mut**
Just hand over the goods and grab the money.
**[07:35] Mut**
That's what we do as black market dealers.
**[07:38] Shin**
It was you?!
**[07:42] Shin**
How can this be?
**[07:44] Shin**
I never dreamed you'd be a
black market dealer, Mutsu-san.
**[07:46] Mut**
In the battle two years ago,
**[07:48] Mut**
we Kaientai lost most of our ships.
**[07:53] Mut**
That moron tried to recover those losses
**[07:55] Mut**
by investing the money we
had left in cryptocurrency.
**[07:59] Mut**
As you'd expect, he lost it
all and left us flat broke.
**[08:03] Mut**
To bring the Kaientai back, we all
decided to raise funds separately.
**[08:07] Shin**
Forget it! He's never coming back from that!
**[08:11] Mut**
I've gone back to my roots and am
dabbling in some rather gray trade.
**[08:16] Shin**
You have the skull and crossbones
right on your cape, though!
**[08:18] Shin**
What you're doing is nearly pitch-black!
**[08:23] Mut**
Take it and go.
**[08:24] Mut**
We got our hands on the
ultimate weapon as ordered.
**[08:29] Shin**
Wh-What is this?
**[08:36] ???**
Don't show me something so
disgusting as soon as I wake up.
**[08:42] Mut**
As far as I know, this
is the ultimate weapon.
**[08:46] Mut**
Member of the universe's mightiest warrior
race, daughter of its best alien hunter,
**[08:51] Mut**
and also the kid sister of
its most notorious pirate,
**[08:54] Mut**
Kagura...
**[08:56] ???**
Huh... So this is Earth, Mommy's other home?
**[09:02] Mut**
Kagura's daughter,
**[09:05] Mut**
Kanna.
**[09:08] Shin**
The Final Fantasy Phenomenon is still going?!
**[10:07] Gin**
That's weird.
**[10:09] Gin**
I don't remember there
being a grave out here.
**[10:13] Gin**
And I don't remember it being a place where
weird ghosts appeared in broad daylight.
**[10:19] Tak**
Unfortunately, I went and made a promise
**[10:24] Tak**
that I'd bring him back here for sure.
**[10:27] Gin**
Then hurry up and pass on.
**[10:29] Gin**
You finished what you came for, right?
**[10:33] Tak**
Finished?
**[10:42] Tak**
Only a specter can grab
another specter's hand.
**[10:47] Tak**
Would you like to hop over to this side, too?
**[10:52] Gin**
Takasugi, you...
**[10:56] G**
You must be Takasugi
Shinsuke, the wanted man!
**[10:58] G**
Quietly turn yourself in!
**[11:04] Gin**
Takasugi!
**[11:08] G**
Are you Takasugi's friend?
**[11:10] Gin**
Is that what it looked like?
**[11:15] Hij**
Leave it at that.
**[11:18] Hij**
It's been a while since we've
caught such promising prey.
**[11:22] Hij**
I'm getting excited.
**[11:26] Hij**
The savior of Earth, meeting up with
an old buddy and plotting evil?
**[11:28] Sign**
Questioning
**[11:31] Gin**
Listen to me!
**[11:32] Gin**
I told you, we were just
conspiring to destroy Earth!
**[11:37] Hij**
You're supposed to make some excuse!
**[11:39] Hij**
You should be trying to
prove your innocence here!
**[11:41] Hij**
Like you'd have the balls
to destroy Earth, anyway!
**[11:44] Gin**
If you know that, then
don't ask me to begin with!
**[11:47] Hij**
Again, come up with some excuse!
**[11:49] Gin**
Let's make it quick.
**[11:50] Gin**
I can't be bothered making excuses anymore.
**[11:53] Gin**
I bet you'll take your demotion out on
me by torturing and then executing me.
**[11:57] Hij**
Who got demoted?
**[11:59] Gin**
Then why're you doing this
out here in the boonies?
**[12:03] Gin**
Well, if you don't wanna talk, that's fine.
**[12:06] Gin**
We have all the time in the world.
**[12:08] Gin**
Hey, get us two katsudons.
**[12:11] Gin**
One covered in mayonnaise.
**[12:13] ???**
Roger.
**[12:14] Hij**
Why are you making it look like
I'm the one being questioned?
**[12:17] Gin**
If you wanna make someone talk,
you've gotta first spill it all yourself.
**[12:21] Gin**
Give me everything you've got, Toshi.
**[12:23] Hij**
Who do you think you are? What's
with that stern-yet-caring gaze?!
**[12:31] Hij**
The Shinsengumi have just split
up temporarily for reasons.
**[12:36] Gin**
Oh, really?
**[12:41] Hij**
After abandoning Edo and Odd Jobs
and disappearing for two years,
**[12:45] Hij**
I was wondering how you
could face yourself in life,
**[12:50] Hij**
but this is just stupid.
**[12:51] Hij**
It's the same old stupid face
I'd grown tired of seeing.
**[12:56] Hij**
Did you know?
**[12:58] Hij**
On that day two years ago,
**[13:00] Hij**
Takasugi's group wasn't the only one
that vanished from the Heavenly Bird.
**[13:03] Hij**
There was one other entity.
**[13:06] Hij**
The Tendoshu.
**[13:09] Hij**
At a glance, they were just lumps of meat,
**[13:11] Hij**
but it seems Utsuro's blood
still remained within them.
**[13:17] Hij**
And lately, out in space,
**[13:20] Hij**
there've been frequent terrorist attacks
in countries that nationalized Altana.
**[13:24] Hij**
Rumors are spreading that
the Tendoshu have revived
**[13:28] Hij**
and have returned to take back
the Altana they lost.
**[13:31] Gin**
And you're saying he was behind it all?
**[13:34] Hij**
No, I can't say anything for sure.
**[13:37] Gin**
He covered his hands in blood to overturn
the world the Tendoshu and Utsuro created.
**[13:43] Hij**
But...
**[13:45] Hij**
He was never picky about the
means to his ends, either, was he?
**[13:50] Hij**
What if, just like you did when you
cast aside Odd Jobs and left,
**[13:53] Hij**
he had something he had to do, too?
**[13:57] Gin**
It's not like I had some big reason.
**[14:01] ???**
If you don't talk, we'll be forced
to arrest you as a prime suspect.
**[14:07] ???**
Is that what you want?
**[14:08] Gin**
It'd be a great help, getting
a place to sleep for free.
**[14:11] ???**
Hijikata-san,
**[14:12] ???**
it seems that further questioning
would be a waste of time.
**[14:15] Hij**
Yeah.
**[14:17] Hij**
But first, there's something I want to ask.
**[14:21] Hij**
Who are you?
**[14:24] Hij**
You joined in like it was
nothing, but who are you?
**[14:27] ???**
Just a mob character.
**[14:29] Hij**
But you stand out too much for that.
**[14:31] Hij**
Could you be Robo—
**[14:32] ???**
I'm Mobcop.
**[14:33] Hij**
What the hell is a Mobcop?
**[14:34] Mob**
Pardon the late introduction.
**[14:36] Mob**
I'm actually Metal Constable 001,
introduced by the new government.
**[14:41] Mob**
Today is my first day on the job.
**[14:43] Hij**
Look, you stand out too
much for a mob character!
**[14:46] Hij**
Could you shut up? You're
distracting from the topic.
**[14:49] Mob**
Oh, I'm sorry. I got too worked up.
**[14:54] Hij**
Odd Jobs, you're free
to keep your mouth shut,
**[14:58] Hij**
but there's a chance you could
hurt Edo with that choice.
**[15:03] Hij**
Is that okay with you?
**[15:05] Hij**
Is that all Edo means to you these days?
**[15:10] Hij**
Or what is it?
**[15:12] Hij**
Do you believe...
**[15:15] Hij**
Too distracting!
**[15:17] Hij**
What have you been dropping over there?!
**[15:20] Mob**
I was just making katsudon.
**[15:21] Hij**
Where the hell are you
dumping the cutlets from?!
**[15:24] Mob**
I'm sorry. I'll spew out some
mayonnaise right away, too.
**[15:26] Hij**
Don't want it!
**[15:27] Hij**
And why's more than half your
body made up of cooking tools?!
**[15:31] Hij**
I'm telling you, you stand out too much!
**[15:32] Hij**
Nobody can focus with you in the frame!
**[15:35] Hij**
If you're a mob character, act like one!
**[15:37] Mob**
How about just letting me handle
this investigation, then?
**[15:41] Hij**
Huh?
**[15:42] Mob**
I've been coded with a wealth of knowledge
amassed by the police over time.
**[15:46] Mob**
Winning over a man like him
would be a piece of cake for me.
**[15:49] Hij**
That's some big talk, little man.
**[15:52] Mob**
Hey, you!
**[15:53] Mob**
Think about your mum back home!
**[15:56] Hij**
That's too cliched.
**[15:58] Hij**
Like you could win over this
punk with such sentimental crap.
**[16:01] Mob**
Do you want to make your mum sad?
**[16:05] Mob**
If I use the weapon I've been equipped with,
**[16:08] Mob**
your mum and the three-kilometer area
around her will be reduced to embers.
**[16:11] Hij**
I didn't see that threat coming!
**[16:13] Gun**
I hate to break it to ya, but I don't
even know if I still have a mum.
**[16:17] Gun**
What about you, though?
**[16:18] Gun**
How could you turn the body your parents
gave you into something so metallic?
**[16:22] Gun**
They must be so sad.
**[16:25] Mob**
Don't be silly.
**[16:26] Mob**
There isn't anyone who would
be saddened over this Mobcop.
**[16:30] Mob**
*Is that really true, though?*
**[16:32] Mob**
* I have no memories of my*
* life before my remodeling.*
**[16:35] Hij**
Hey! Why's a mob character
entering a flashback?!
**[16:38] Mob**
*But from what I've heard,*
**[16:40] Mob**
* I got into an accident and*
* was in critical condition*
**[16:42] Mob**
* when I offered my body up as*
* a test subject for Mobcop.*
**[16:46] Hij**
Nobody cares about you!
**[16:49] Mob**
*Was there nobody saddened by that?*
**[16:54] Mob**
No, wait. The fact that nobody's
looking for me tells the whole story.
**[16:59] Mob**
I've been forgotten by one and all.
**[17:02] Mob**
And I forgot everything so
I wouldn't remember that!
**[17:06] Hij**
What's the point of you spilling your guts?
**[17:09] Gin**
Someone who didn't have anybody to
sadden would never shed those things.
**[17:14] Gin**
Even if your memories are gone,
your body still remembers
**[17:18] Gin**
that you once had people dear to you,
people you would shed tears over.
**[17:23] Gin**
They just haven't recognized
you in your changed state.
**[17:28] Gin**
If you put your name out there,
they'll surely come running to you.
**[17:32] Mob**
R-Really?
**[17:33] Hij**
Hey, who are we questioning here?
**[17:36] Gin**
Yeah.
**[17:37] Gin**
So don't fear. Remember.
**[17:39] Gin**
Who are you?
**[17:41] Gin**
Were you plotting evil with Takasugi?
**[17:44] Hij**
Don't try to frame him for your crimes!
**[17:50] Mob**
I think I'm starting to remember!
It's at the tip of my helmet!
**[17:55] Mob**
My ID! Where's my ID?!
**[17:57] Gin**
Your ID?
**[17:58] Mob**
The only lead to my past life!
**[18:00] Mob**
My police ID still had my photo...
**[18:09] Hij**
Oh...
**[18:09] Gin**
Oh...
**[18:13] Hij**
I forgot about him.
**[18:13] Gin**
I forgot about him.
**[18:14] Ymz**
Are you kidding me?!
**[18:18] Ymz**
I remember now.
**[18:22] Ymz**
Thanks to you guys forgetting about
me, I've got this cool body now!
**[18:27] Ymz**
And my real body is being treated, put up
for display in briefs that have skid marks!
**[18:35] Gin**
Wait, hold up! We didn't forget you!
**[18:39] Gin**
We've just been busy since then,
**[18:41] Gin**
so we forgot—er, put you
on the back burner for a bit!
**[18:45] Hij**
We remembered him, right?
**[18:46] Gin**
Totally remembered him!
**[18:47] Gin**
I'm so glad to see you're
doing well, uh, er...
**[18:53] Gin**
Shibasaki-kun?
**[18:54] Ymz**
So you did forget!
**[19:00] Hij**
Why, you little!
**[19:03] Gin**
You guys are still the same, too.
**[19:08] Gin**
What about them?
**[19:10] Gin**
Are the Odd Jobs guys doing all right?
**[19:14] Hij**
Go see for yourself!
**[19:21] G**
After him!
**[19:24] Hij**
That moron!
**[19:30] Mut**
Well, it's in your hands now.
**[19:33] Tam**
Shinpachi-sama.
**[19:35] Tam**
Shinpachi-sama?
**[19:36] Tam**
Shinpachi-sama!
**[19:38] Kan**
Hey, what're you doing?
**[19:40] Kan**
I wanna hurry up and explore Edo, 'kay?
**[19:42] Kan**
Can I go on ahead?
**[19:44] Tam**
I'm sorry. Something's
wrong with Shinpachi-sama.
**[19:47] Tam**
Hey!
**[19:48] Kan**
That probably won't help.
**[19:51] Kan**
He dropped this earlier.
**[19:54] Kan**
Mommy told me that there are creatures on
Earth whose glasses are their real body.
**[20:00] Shin**
Wait, who the hell is your mommy?!
**[20:04] Kan**
See?
**[20:05] Shin**
Th-That was close!
**[20:07] Shin**
My heart and straight man
routine had stopped.
**[20:10] Shin**
Wh-What's going on?
**[20:11] Shin**
Kagura-chan's daughter?
**[20:13] Shin**
Th-That can't be.
**[20:14] Shin**
You won't trick me anymore, Final Fantasy!
**[20:17] Kan**
You're Pachi-boy, Mommy's lackey, right?
**[20:20] Shin**
Who're you calling a lackey?!
**[20:22] Kan**
I've heard all about it.
**[20:23] Kan**
About how there are a bunch of base
lifeforms on Earth that I've never seen.
**[20:28] Shin**
So all you heard was bitching?!
**[20:29] Shin**
J-Just drop it already!
**[20:31] Shin**
There's no way you can be Kagura-chan's kid!
**[20:33] Shin**
She was only 14 back then!
**[20:35] Shin**
Even now, she's only 16!
**[20:37] Shin**
Sh-She'd never do something so dirty!
**[20:40] Shin**
Neither I nor *Jump* will ever accept it!
**[20:42] Kan**
Dirty? Is having a kid a dirty thing?
**[20:45] Kan**
What about it is dirty?
**[20:47] Shin**
Well, uh... Please stop looking
at me with stars in your eyes.
**[20:52] Shin**
Wh-Who's your father, then?
**[20:54] Kan**
A banana.
**[20:56] Shin**
That's not what I meant.
**[20:58] Shin**
Um, whose banana?
**[21:03] Kan**
When she ate too many bananas and
puked, I came out, apparently.
**[21:07] Shin**
She gave birth like King Piccolo?!
**[21:09] Shin**
Is that how it goes for Yato?!
**[21:11] Kan**
Nah, she said it was a technique
she was taught on some planet.
**[21:15] Kan**
Apparently, it's more like
cloning than giving birth.
**[21:17] Shin**
That's not the kind of move
a heroine should learn!
**[21:22] Shin**
Then you are...
**[21:25] Shin**
Has Kagura-chan been well?
**[21:27] Shin**
And Sadaharu?
**[21:29] ???**
What's this?
**[21:32] ???**
I asked for a weapon to kill
the prime minister with,
**[21:36] ???**
not something else for me to kill.
**[21:37] Shin**
That's...
**[21:39] (Flashback) Mat**
I arranged for a first-rate assassin.
**[21:46] ???**
Hey.
**[21:49] ???**
I'll let you guys check the
contents of those boxes.
**[21:53] ???**
Leave this to me.
**[22:01] ???**
You can't tell if a weapon's
any good until you use it.
**[22:05] ???**
Show me...
**[22:07] ???**
what you've done these
past two years, Odd Jobs!
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:44] Gin**
In reality, that's probably the right answer.
**[23:47] Tak**
I'm always prepared to look back.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Two in Girl Years
Is Equal to Ten in Man Years
***SIGN*** Old buddies have changed drastically
***SIGN*** in every way over these two years.
***SIGN*** Wandering alone after leaving Odd Jobs,
***SIGN*** how does Gintoki feel right now?
# 364 - Two in Girl Years Is Equal to Ten in Man Years
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!!
**[00:05] Mut**
Take it and go.
**[00:06] Mut**
We got our hands on the
ultimate weapon as ordered.
**[00:12] Mut**
As far as I know, this
is the ultimate weapon.
**[00:16] ???**
Huh... So this is Earth, Mommy's other home?
**[00:22] Mut**
Kagura's daughter,
**[00:25] Mut**
Kanna.
**[00:26] Gin**
That's weird.
**[00:28] Gin**
I don't remember there
being a grave out here.
**[00:35] Tak**
Only a specter can grab
another specter's hand.
**[00:40] Tak**
Would you like to hop over to this side, too?
**[00:44] ???**
What's this?
**[00:46] ???**
I asked for a weapon to kill
the prime minister with,
**[00:50] ???**
not something else for me to kill.
**[00:58] ???**
You can't tell if a weapon's
any good until you use it.
**[01:02] ???**
Show me, Odd Jobs...
**[01:04] ???**
what you've done these
past two years!
**[01:06] Shin**
O-Okita-san?!
**[01:11] Shin**
Hey, Okita-san!
**[01:13] Shin**
Wait!
**[01:14] Shin**
Time out! Time out!
**[01:15] Oki**
Wow. You've gotten a bit better, huh?
**[01:21] G**
Okita-san! If you wanna
fight, take it elsewhere!
**[01:24] Shin**
You guys!
**[01:26] Shin**
Wasn't the Shinsengumi disbanded?
**[01:28] Shin**
And wasn't Okita-san forced
to commit seppuku?!
**[01:30] Oki**
Yeah. The Shinsengumi died, and so did I.
**[01:34] Oki**
We weren't needed in this
peaceful world, apparently.
**[01:37] Oki**
But there's still a bunch of pests in this
country who threaten that peace,
**[01:43] Oki**
so we were reborn as a group that kills
them in the new government's stead:
**[01:50] Oki**
the Japanese Office of Homeland Security's
Department of Environmental Control...
**[01:56] Oki**
Damn, that's long.
**[01:58] Oki**
Just call us the mafia.
**[01:59] Shi**
So in the end, you're just mafia?!
**[02:00] Kan**
Hey, how long are you
gonna keep up this farce?
**[02:04] Shin**
This is dangerous, Kanna-chan! Stay back!
**[02:06] Kan**
What about him is dangerous?
**[02:09] Kan**
He's got no bloodlust,
and his strikes are slow.
**[02:11] Kan**
Each hit couldn't be more light.
**[02:16] Shin**
Kanna-chan?!
**[02:19] Kan**
Looks like you were finally
out to kill with that one.
**[02:22] Oki**
How amusing.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Two in Girl Years
Is Equal to Ten in Man Years
**[04:03] G**
Hmm... A one-eyed samurai?
**[04:06] G**
Sorry. Can't say I recognize him.
**[04:11] W**
He does seem somewhat familiar.
**[04:13] W**
Don't tell anyone we said that, please.
**[04:16] W**
Cripes, that's scary.
**[04:18] W**
What? Did this guy do something bad?
**[04:21] W**
I'm sure he did.
**[04:22] W**
Murder? Drugs? Et cetera?
**[04:24] W**
It's gotta be the et cetera, right?
He totally looks like the et cetera sort.
**[04:27] W**
Hey, y'all. Have you seen this samurai?
**[04:30] W**
He's done et cetera,
apparently. That's so scary.
**[04:32] W**
No idea. I've never seen
a face anything like that.
**[04:35] W**
Oh, but I did see a samurai earlier.
**[04:37] W**
Think it was on the street that-a-way.
**[04:43] G**
Why, you...
**[04:45] G**
You walk into us and don't even apologize?
**[04:48] G**
And what's with that smug look?
**[04:49] G**
Draw that thing on your waist!
**[04:53] G**
What a coward.
**[04:55] G**
I bet your sword down there
can't satisfy a woman, either.
**[05:02] Hen**
I hate to break it to you,
**[05:04] Hen**
but my goal is to lead all ladies,
young and old, to happiness.
**[05:09] Hen**
That's what a feminist
wields his sword for—
**[05:12] G**
H-Hey, bro, that guy's ours.
**[05:15] G**
Um, don't you think you're going too far?
**[05:19] G**
Th-This bitch is packing heat!
**[05:21] ---**
Shit! Beat it, quick!
**[05:23] Mat**
Finally, we've got a lead.
**[05:26] Mat**
White Yaksha...
**[05:29] Mat**
Is Shinsuke-sama alive?
**[05:34] Mat**
Then, Shinsuke-sama is...
**[05:36] Gin**
He ain't dead.
**[05:39] Gin**
But I don't know if I can
call him alive, either.
**[05:43] Mat**
That's not important.
**[05:45] Mat**
I'm just glad to know he's
still alive, no matter how.
**[05:49] Gin**
Anyway, what are you planning
to do after you find Takasugi?
**[05:53] Hen**
The Kiheitai aren't done yet.
**[05:56] Hen**
We'll simply help him achieve
whatever his goal is.
**[06:00] Gin**
Don't bother.
**[06:03] Gin**
He's probably acting solely
for himself right now.
**[06:08] Gin**
If you show up now, he'll be forced to stop.
**[06:14] Gin**
Otherwise, he'd never have left you behind.
**[06:19] Gin**
If you're okay with that,
too, then suit yourselves.
**[06:25] Gin**
In reality, that's probably the right answer.
**[06:28] Gin**
Later!
**[06:34] Gin**
Hey, pops.
**[06:37] Gin**
I'm in the mood for a drink.
Get me something with that money.
**[06:45] Mat**
White Yaksha!
**[06:49] Mat**
Who the hell are those guys?
**[07:00] Mat**
White Yaksha!
**[07:04] Gin**
Stay away!
**[07:05] Gin**
Crap! Please help me!
**[07:08] Mat**
What happened to "Stay away"?!
**[07:10] Hen**
I've heard that the White
Yaksha has a weakness.
**[07:15] Hen**
When he was a child, he was cursed by a
strange fruit and became unable to swim.
**[07:20] Mat**
What? He gets a new trait
this late in the story?!
**[07:23] Mat**
Don't tell me that fruit was...
**[07:25] Hen**
Indeed.
**[07:26] Hen**
He tried to split a watermelon using
the scent of its sugar content alone,
**[07:30] Hen**
nearly drowned, became unable to swim, and
gained a sloppy, rubbery persona instead.
**[07:36] Mat**
Uh, the fruit had nothing to do with that!
He's just a good-for-nothing who can't swim!
**[07:49] Gin**
Dammit! I can't hold out any longer!
**[08:18] Gin**
Heya,
**[08:19] Gin**
mastermind.
**[08:22] Gin**
Did you come to get a bird's-eye
view, like a typical mastermind?
**[08:26] Gin**
You're rather close to the ground, though.
**[08:28] Gin**
Try wearing some high heels
or something, Teeny-Weeny-kun.
**[08:33] Tak**
If I were the mastermind,
I wouldn't screw up like this.
**[08:36] Tak**
I wouldn't screw up and get on
Takasugi Shinsuke's bad side.
**[08:40] Tak**
Hand over what you've got in your pocket.
**[08:43] Tak**
I never expected you'd have it.
**[08:47] Tak**
No wonder they're so desperate.
**[08:50] Tak**
As long as you have that thing, they'll
chase you to the ends of the world.
**[08:55] Tak**
So give it to me and let
us specters handle it.
**[08:58] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama!
**[09:00] Gin**
Why not say something to them, too?
**[09:03] Gin**
Something like, "don't follow me,"
or even "forget about me."
**[09:07] Gin**
Or wait, are you the one who
can't forget about them?
**[09:10] Gin**
I don't think you'll get
very far like that...
**[09:15] Gin**
What the hell are you doing?
**[09:17] Gin**
When Gin-san's speaking with a serious face,
**[09:19] Gin**
not even villains should interrupt him!
Don't you know that unspoken rule?!
**[09:23] Tak**
If you won't wash your hands of this,
I'll just take the thing after you drown.
**[09:27] Gin**
Wait, wait! What thing?!
**[09:29] Gin**
The porn you lent me when we were kids?
**[09:31] Gin**
I'll give it back!
**[09:32] Gin**
Was it *Erotopia*? *Temple Babes*?
**[09:34] Gin**
Wait, you liked the amateur
stuff, didn't you?
**[09:37] Tak**
I don't remember ever lending
or borrowing crap like that.
**[09:39] Gin**
Oh, right! You must've let me have it!
**[09:41] Gin**
You were a rich boy, after all.
**[09:43] Gin**
Then, the NES cartridges I lost...
**[09:44] Tak**
Give back my *Portopia Serial Murder Case.*
**[09:46] Gin**
*Portopia* was a loan, though?!
**[09:48] Gin**
You played *Portopia*?!
**[09:50] Tak**
It's all too late, Gintoki.
**[09:53] Tak**
Looks like we can't turn back or
look back on the past anymore.
**[09:58] Tak**
Well, I guess there'd be nothing
to say, even if we did look back.
**[10:04] Mat**
Shinsuke-sama!
**[10:33] Gin**
Takasugi! You bastard!
**[10:36] Tak**
Relax. Even if you die, I won't
let them have the thing.
**[10:40] Tak**
I'll keep it much safer than you ever could.
**[10:42] Gin**
Safer?!
**[10:43] Gin**
As if a delusional punk who was
talking about destroying the world
**[10:46] Gin**
could ever keep *Portopia* safe!
**[10:47] Tak**
I'm not talking about *Portopia*!
**[10:49] Gin**
Don't get cocky just because
you can swim a little.
**[10:52] Gin**
With my ability to sink like a stone, I can
easily pull you to the bottom of this river!
**[10:57] Tak**
Is that something to be proud of?
**[10:58] Gin**
Ow, ow! Water up my nose!
**[11:00] Gin**
You'll pay for this!
**[11:01] Tak**
Hand it over already!
**[11:13] Gin**
Get 'em!
**[11:17] Hij**
Squad 3, evacuate the residents!
**[11:20] Hij**
Squads 1 and 2, hurry to the scene!
**[11:23] Ymz**
Vice Chief!
**[11:24] Hij**
Yamazaki! Sitrep!
**[11:26] Ymz**
Not many losses in the city center!
**[11:28] Hij**
Uh, aren't you causing the most losses?
**[11:32] Ymz**
All those who had collapsed
seem to be Naraku.
**[11:35] Ymz**
They were probably done in by the two
samurai mentioned in the witness reports.
**[11:39] Hij**
Two samurai?
**[11:41] Hij**
It's gotta be them!
**[11:46] Gin**
We've both gone really downhill, huh?
**[11:48] Gin**
You're only supposed to have someone
trustworthy watch your back.
**[11:53] Gin**
But we've both got the most untrustworthy
bastard in the world behind us.
**[11:57] Tak**
Don't worry, Gintoki.
**[12:00] Tak**
I'm ready to turn around at any moment.
**[12:04] Tak**
I'm not against killing you to help myself.
**[12:08] Tak**
Don't you think we stand here right now
because we don't hold back with each other?
**[12:16] Tak**
But the annoying lapdogs
will come sniffing soon.
**[12:21] Hij**
Those guys!
**[12:23] Tak**
Look offshore.
**[12:26] Tak**
I have a ship ready.
Come with me if you want to.
**[12:30] Tak**
Our methods may differ, but it
seems your goal's the same as mine.
**[12:35] Tak**
In that case, you should
exploit me for all I'm worth.
**[12:40] Tak**
Or else you won't be able
to keep this thing safe.
**[12:44] Gin**
Why, you... Was it back then?
**[12:47] Tak**
Well, that's only if you
can swim all the way there.
**[12:50] Gin**
Takasugi, you bastard!
**[12:59] Shin**
A-Amazing.
**[13:02] Kan**
Are you done now?
**[13:04] Oki**
Now I see how it is.
**[13:08] Oki**
But while this may be enough to kill
Katsura, I don't know about the others!
**[13:13] Kan**
Others?
**[13:15] Oki**
We didn't call for you guys.
**[13:18] Oki**
We need the boss's help in case
an enemy we can't take shows up!
**[13:25] Oki**
Sakata Gintoki.
**[13:28] Oki**
What's wrong?
**[13:31] Oki**
Your movements suddenly got sloppy.
**[13:34] Oki**
Wait a second.
**[13:36] Oki**
Is your father...
**[13:38] Kan**
Like hell!
**[13:40] Shin**
That's enough!
**[13:42] Shin**
I will not let you sully the
name of Odd Jobs anymore.
**[13:45] Shin**
He... Gin-san...
**[13:48] Shin**
He ate so many sweets, he's impo—
**[13:50] Kan**
What are you even talking about?!
**[13:52] Kan**
I didn't come here to
bring Odd Jobs back!
**[13:56] Kan**
If that's what you want, try someone else!
**[13:59] Oki**
What are you saying?
**[14:00] Oki**
If you wanna be hands-off about it,
try ripping these hands off by force!
**[14:04] Kan**
You don't have to tell me.
**[14:06] Kan**
That's my plan!
**[14:08] Oki**
Do you really think you can
shake me off like that?
**[14:12] Shin**
Look, I'll ignore the fact that
you're using me as a weapon!
**[14:16] Shin**
Please just hit the target!
**[14:20] Oki**
68.20 meters.
**[14:21] Shin**
When did the rules change?
**[14:24] Oki**
I haven't felt these
goosebumps in a long time.
**[14:28] Kan**
Huh? What the heck are you talking about?
**[14:30] Oki**
I fought your mom like this all the time.
**[14:33] Shin**
I don't understand the rules!
**[14:35] Oki**
We crossed swords more often
than we exchanged words.
**[14:38] Oki**
But, at times, swords speak
much louder than words!
**[14:42] Shin**
Are you even competing anymore?!
**[14:44] Oki**
One fight is all I need
to see through your lies.
**[14:50] Kan**
I don't really get it, but okay.
**[14:53] Shin**
No need for the nom nom time!
**[14:56] Oki**
Your mom's already here, right?
**[15:00] Oki**
I thought she'd show up at once
if I hurt her daughter a little.
**[15:04] Oki**
But I can't hold back any longer. Don't
you care what happens to your daughter?
**[15:09] Kan**
Who are you even talking to?!
**[15:14] Oki**
Call her.
**[15:15] Oki**
"Mom, help me!"
**[15:18] Shin**
Kanna-chan!
**[15:20] Oki**
Actually, he might be more
effective bait than the daughter.
**[15:31] Shin**
K-Kanna-chan?
**[15:33] Oki**
Wrong.
**[15:35] Oki**
Looks like she's finally back...
**[15:38] Oki**
That stubborn girl.
**[15:39] Shin**
Wait, could it be...
**[15:43] Shin**
Something unbalanced showed up!
**[16:06] Oki**
Yo.
**[16:08] Oki**
Welcome back.
**[16:14] Shin**
K-Kanna-chan.
**[16:17] Shin**
Are you...
**[16:19] Oki**
She never existed in the first place.
**[16:22] Oki**
That's not her daughter or her clone.
**[16:28] Oki**
It's just her.
**[16:31] Kag**
I see you're still the same old jerk.
**[16:34] Kag**
Said your prayers yet?
**[16:37] Oki**
Prayers for what?
**[16:39] Oki**
You haven't changed, either.
**[16:44] Oki**
Same lousy follow-through.
**[17:04] Shin**
Kagura-chan.
**[17:05] Shin**
Or should I call you Kanna-chan instead?
**[17:09] Shin**
I don't mind either way.
**[17:11] Shin**
Just the fact that you returned to Earth...
**[17:14] Shin**
Oh, it wouldn't be a return
for Kanna-chan, would it?
**[17:18] Kag**
You haven't changed at all, Shinpachi.
**[17:20] Kag**
Still needlessly looking out for others.
**[17:24] Kag**
I was a fool.
**[17:26] Kag**
You don't have to call me Kanna anymore.
**[17:29] Kag**
Granny Kagura will do.
**[17:31] Shin**
It wasn't Kagura-chan or Kanna-chan!
**[17:34] Kag**
I used a bit too much power.
**[17:37] Kag**
I'm going to lie down for a bit, Michiko-san.
**[17:41] Kag**
Hup.
**[17:43] Shin**
Who the hell is Michiko-san?!
**[17:44] Shin**
First a little girl, and now an old bag?
What's going on with you, Granny Kagura?
**[17:47] Kag**
Let's see... I think it was
around thirty years ago.
**[17:53] Shin**
You haven't lived that long, Granny Kagura!
**[17:56] Kag**
Back then, I was a bombshell
babe and so popular on Earth,
**[18:01] Kag**
I got sick of the attention and left.
**[18:05] Shin**
Don't give yourself fake
memories, Granny Kagura.
**[18:06] Kag**
And so began my journey to turn my
beloved dog, Rogers, back to normal.
**[18:14] Shin**
Don't forget your beloved
dog's name, Granny Kagura!
**[18:16] Kag**
But I couldn't find a way to
turn Bolognese back to normal.
**[18:21] Shin**
Keep the name consistent, Granny Kagura.
**[18:24] Kag**
As I went from planet to planet, from
one harsh environment to another,
**[18:28] Kag**
my body couldn't keep up.
**[18:31] Kag**
That's when he appeared in front of me.
**[18:36] (Flashback) G**
ZZ? Z, Z?
**[18:38] Shin**
Huh? What's this?
**[18:38] (Flashback) G**
ZZZZ...
**[18:39] Shin**
Who's that? What's he saying?
**[18:41] (Flashback) Kag**
ZZZZ? ZZ!
**[18:43] Shin**
Oh, you can speak it, too?
What language is this, even?
**[18:43] (Flashback) Kag**
ZZZZZ, ZZZ.
**[18:45] Kag**
Zzzzz...
**[18:48] Shin**
Hey, gran. What's that thing
coming out of your nose?
**[18:52] Shin**
Can I burst it? Will you keep going if I do?
**[18:56] Kag**
That's how I ended up with this body.
**[18:59] Shin**
You zzz'd through the most important part!
**[19:01] Kag**
But all my efforts were in vain.
**[19:06] Kag**
In the end, I couldn't change a thing.
**[19:13] Kag**
I talked a big game and left
Earth, but achieved nothing.
**[19:21] Kag**
How was I supposed to come
back and face everyone?
**[19:26] Kag**
Hey, tell me!
**[19:28] Shin**
Not with that face, at least.
**[19:32] Kag**
Now that I've rested a bit,
I've mostly gone back to normal.
**[19:35] Shin**
Your face looks like Baron Ashura's, though!
**[19:40] Shin**
Kagura-chan.
**[19:42] Shin**
You have nothing to feel bad about.
**[19:44] Shin**
You took on our feelings and went
on a journey to save Sadaharu.
**[19:50] Shin**
Odd Jobs didn't disband because of you.
**[19:54] Shin**
Even if you hadn't left,
I think he would have...
**[19:58] Oki**
Vanished?
**[20:00] Oki**
Then maybe the boss really
did know all along...
**[20:05] Oki**
that he was still alive, too.
**[20:08] Shin**
Who do you mean?
**[20:14] G**
Boss, you okay?
**[20:17] Tak**
Sorry. I kept you waiting.
**[20:20] G**
No problem! Anything to help
the hero Takasugi Shinsuke!
**[20:26] G**
Weigh anchor!
**[20:27] Tak**
Hold on.
**[20:33] Tak**
There's no way he'd come, huh?
**[20:37] Tak**
I guess this is where we part forever.
**[20:39] Tak**
Takechi, Matako, forgive me.
**[20:48] Gin**
Give it back.
**[20:50] Tak**
How did you get here?
**[20:51] Gin**
Isn't that obvious?
**[20:53] Gin**
Since I can't swim, I just walked.
**[20:58] Tak**
Looks like you've seen far
more carnage than I have.
**[21:03] Tak**
I guess you need to be ready for that if
you want to carry something so dangerous.
**[21:10] Tak**
Where did you get it?
**[21:11] Gin**
I was looking for something else, actually.
**[21:15] Gin**
This is just a byproduct
I found during the process.
**[21:19] Gin**
The famous sweet shop Enshichi's
specialty bean-jam mochi.
**[21:22] Tak**
Not that!
**[21:23] Gin**
What was that for? I'd been
saving it to relish the taste!
**[21:27] Gin**
Wow, they're yummy even
when eaten with my eyes!
**[21:28] Tak**
What the hell are you making me steal?
**[21:31] Gin**
Huh? Didn't you wanna try them, too?
**[21:34] Gin**
Oh, then how about this Kyoto specialty—
**[21:36] Tak**
Not that, either!
**[21:37] Gin**
How could you tell before seeing it?!
**[21:40] Tak**
As if you'd get people like that
on your tail over tourist food!
**[21:42] Gin**
What if the rest of the sentence had been
"Yoshioka Riho covered in yatsuhashi"?
**[21:47] Gin**
Can I eat her? Can I eat her
along with the yatsuhashi?
**[21:49] Tak**
Sure. Get diarrhea and die.
**[21:53] Tak**
You've already got it, haven't you?
**[22:00] Tak**
Utsuro's...
**[22:03] Tak**
Yoshida Shoyo's heart.
***SIGN*** Preview
**[23:40] Gin**
I found something I needed to do
as Shoka Sonjuku's Sakata Gintoki.
**[23:46] Tak**
If you wanna save him, go ahead.
**[23:47] Tak**
You can do that now.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Salvation
***SIGN*** The path Gintoki walked these past two years,
***SIGN*** and the path Takasugi walked these past two years...
***SIGN*** They converge into one point.
***SIGN*** And their teacher's existence once again...
# 365 - Salvation
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!!
**[00:06] Shin**
He's alive?
**[00:08] Shin**
What are you talking about, Okita-san?
**[00:11] Shin**
Don't tell me...
**[00:13] Shin**
You mean...
**[00:15] Oki**
Utsuro.
**[00:18] Oki**
Yoshida Shoyo.
**[00:20] Oki**
Nah.
**[00:21] Oki**
He might've taken a completely different
form that's neither of them now,
**[00:28] Oki**
but he's still alive.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Salvation
**[02:13] Shin**
When did you know that he wasn't dead yet?
**[02:20] Gin**
I knew all along.
**[02:22] Gin**
Back then, he willingly threw
himself into the ley line.
**[02:29] Gin**
But he was born from Altana anyway.
**[02:33] Gin**
So it'd be no surprise if he came back
reborn from some part of it.
**[02:41] Gin**
To top it off, I heard what he said.
**[02:45] (Flashback) Uts**
Humans.
**[02:48] (Flashback) Uts**
This isn't the end.
**[02:52] (Flashback) Uts**
You have gone and chosen...
**[02:57] (Flashback) Uts**
An endless war,
**[03:00] (Flashback) Uts**
and a life dyed in sorrow and suffering.
**[03:06] (Flashback) Uts**
Nobody can save your teacher anymore.
**[03:12] Gin**
He tried to end the world.
**[03:16] Gin**
We managed to stop that,
**[03:19] Gin**
but we couldn't manage to save our teacher.
**[03:25] Gin**
So I went back to being alone.
**[03:29] Gin**
Not a member of Odd Jobs,
but just a student again.
**[03:33] Gin**
I found something I needed to do
as Shoka Sonjuku's Sakata Gintoki.
**[03:40] (Flashback) Ane**
Investigate all the gates?
**[03:43] (Flashback) Ane**
But why?
**[03:45] (Flashback) Mone**
Gates are spiritual points where energy from
the ley lines gushes out to the surface.
**[03:51] (Flashback) Mone**
They differ in size and are
scattered all across the world.
**[03:55] (Flashback) Mone**
Not even we, the priestesses of the
Golden Dragon, know about all of them.
**[04:03] (Flashback) Mone**
And you want to go around
checking every single one?
**[04:19] (Flashback) Mone**
We've worshiped that gate for generations.
**[04:24] (Flashback) Mone**
As such, we've witnessed strange happenings
in these lands every now and then.
**[04:30] (Flashback) Mone**
But that one stood out among them all.
**[04:35] (Flashback) Mone**
At first, we thought it was an animal corpse.
**[04:39] (Flashback) Mone**
But within a few days,
**[04:41] (Flashback) Mone**
it began taking a different form.
**[04:45] (Flashback) Mone**
But that, um... What do I even call it?
**[04:51] (Flashback) Mone**
I'm not the least bit certain.
**[04:54] (Flashback) Mone**
Is this child human?
**[05:44] Gin**
I couldn't put an end to it.
**[05:54] Gin**
I don't know if he knew how I felt or not.
**[06:00] Gin**
He just grew rapidly in the blink of an eye.
**[06:08] Gin**
Not only did he never talk to me, but he
never even expressed any will or desire.
**[06:13] Gin**
He just quietly followed me,
**[06:19] Gin**
no matter where I went.
**[06:30] (Flashback) Gin**
Sheesh.
**[06:32] (Flashback) Gin**
Can't you at least ask for help?
**[06:36] (Flashback) Gin**
Actually, I guess I'm the one
being unfathomable here.
**[06:40] (Flashback) Gin**
I feel like I'm raising a final boss.
**[06:44] (Flashback) Sho**
You have to grow stronger than
me using your own sword.
**[06:50] (Flashback) Gin**
Is this how you used to feel, Shoyo?
**[07:02] (Flashback) Sho**
No, I don't think so.
**[07:06] (Flashback) Sho**
Compared to how you were as a kid,
**[07:08] (Flashback) Sho**
I was a much cuter, much
better boy, wasn't I?
**[07:17] (Flashback) Gin**
Shoyo?
**[07:20] (Flashback) Gin**
Are you... Shoyo?
**[07:24] (Flashback) Sho**
Shoyo? That sounds so nostalgic.
**[07:28] (Flashback) Sho**
I've been called many, many names
and have lived just as many lives.
**[07:35] (Flashback) Sho**
But of those countless old names,
I remembered just this one.
**[07:40] (Flashback) Sho**
That's who I am.
**[07:42] (Flashback) Sho**
You're the one who made me remember, Gintoki.
**[07:47] (Flashback) Sho**
So I want to tell you while I still can...
**[07:51] (Flashback) Sho**
Entrust you with this while I'm still myself.
**[07:56] (Flashback) Sho**
Gintoki, I...
**[08:15] (Flashback) Sho**
Good grief.
**[08:17] (Flashback) Sho**
It seems we have some unwanted visitors.
**[08:26] (Flashback) Sho**
I'm sorry,
**[08:29] (Flashback) Sho**
but I won't let you have him.
**[08:35] (Flashback) Sho**
This is my heart right now.
**[08:39] (Flashback) Sho**
Utsuro... We must not be left
to roam free in this world.
**[08:48] (Flashback) Sho**
I entrust it to you.
**[08:55] (Flashback) Sho**
I'm sorry I caused you
trouble to the very end.
**[08:59] (Flashback) Sho**
And I'm truly happy to have met you again...
**[09:07] Gin**
Utsuro lost his body in
the battle two years ago.
**[09:13] Gin**
But the massive amount of Altana within him
**[09:16] Gin**
combined with the Altana he fell
into and regenerated his body.
**[09:23] Gin**
So now that I have this, Utsuro
will never come back to life again.
**[09:29] Gin**
Looks like the remnants of the Naraku were
working behind the scenes to bring him back,
**[09:34] Gin**
but he stopped them by gouging out
his own heart and giving it to me.
**[09:40] Gin**
I spent these past two years wandering
everywhere, trying to save him.
**[09:45] Gin**
But in the end, he had to
go and save me yet again.
**[09:51] Tak**
What exactly is the salvation you speak of?
**[09:54] Tak**
Putting an end to Sensei
and Utsuro as he wished?
**[10:00] Tak**
If so, why carry that around like
it's some precious treasure?
**[10:04] Tak**
Maybe it's your resolve that's
wavering and wandering.
**[10:10] Tak**
Then why not just give it back to Utsuro?
**[10:15] Gin**
Takasugi, you...
**[10:17] Tak**
Not a bad idea if it means we
can see Sensei again, right?
**[10:22] Tak**
Though it'll be a gamble on
whether he or Utsuro shows up.
**[10:26] Gin**
What's wrong with you?!
**[10:28] Tak**
Don't get so worked up.
**[10:29] Tak**
I don't intend to take that
gamble. There's no need.
**[10:32] Gin**
Huh? What do you mean?
**[10:34] Tak**
Why bring him back to life?
**[10:40] Tak**
His body's still alive.
**[10:45] Tak**
After you received his heart,
the Naraku took Utsuro's body back.
**[10:51] Tak**
It's in an inanimate state, but that's
probably more convenient for them.
**[10:56] Gin**
Convenient?
**[10:57] Gin**
Weren't they coming for the heart
so they could bring Utsuro back?
**[11:02] Tak**
Nope.
**[11:04] Tak**
I don't know about the Naraku,
**[11:06] Tak**
but the people controlling them...
**[11:08] Gin**
Wait, you mean...
**[11:17] Gin**
Takasugi, you...
**[11:21] Gin**
How'd your body end up like that?
**[11:24] Gin**
What did you see, and where?
**[11:27] Gin**
What did you learn?
**[11:37] Gin**
Takasugi, you...
**[11:40] Gin**
How'd your body end up like that?
**[11:43] Gin**
What did you see, and where?
**[11:45] Gin**
What did you learn?
**[11:55] (Flashback) Tak**
I'm sorry.
**[11:56] (Flashback) Tak**
I don't think I can take your
ashes back to the Shoka Sonjuku.
**[12:03] (Flashback) Tak**
Before I drop dead, there's
something else I need to do.
**[12:11] (Flashback) Tak**
I must destroy them, if nobody else!
**[12:29] (Flashback) Ten**
To think there'd still be someone
who'd point such eyes at us.
**[12:35] (Flashback) Ten**
Right now, we have no power.
**[12:39] (Flashback) Ten**
We can't even die.
**[12:42] (Flashback) Tak**
So what?
**[12:46] (Flashback) Tak**
My left eye knows...
**[12:49] (Flashback) Tak**
What you did,
**[12:52] (Flashback) Tak**
and what it is I must do.
**[12:57] (Flashback) Tak**
If you don't know how to die, I'll teach you.
**[13:02] (Flashback) U**
How cruel is that?
**[13:06] (Flashback) U**
They were no more than pawns.
**[13:09] (Flashback) U**
The one who really cursed you students
and your teacher to this fate
**[13:14] (Flashback) U**
was me, was it not?
**[13:16] (Flashback) U**
If you must kill someone, kill me.
**[13:19] (Flashback) U**
But the seeds I have sown are already
spreading across the country.
**[13:25] (Flashback) U**
You're going to die soon.
**[13:27] (Flashback) U**
Do you really have the time
to weed out all of them?
**[13:32] (Flashback) U**
This is the path you humans chose.
**[13:36] (Flashback) U**
The suffering won't end.
**[13:38] (Flashback) U**
The sorrow won't end.
**[13:41] (Flashback) U**
You have made another terrible mistake.
**[13:54] (Flashback) U**
Your enemy
**[13:59] (Flashback) U**
is yourselves!
**[14:08] (Flashback) G**
All right! Carry them out!
**[14:09] (Flashback) G**
Hurry up! The ship's gonna crash!
**[14:11] (Flashback) G**
Get a move on!
**[14:14] (Flashback) Tak**
Stop it.
**[14:17] (Flashback) Tak**
That power can't be allowed to survive.
**[14:21] (Flashback) Tak**
It's too much for people to handle.
**[14:25] (Flashback) Tak**
Are you trying to start the cycle again?
**[14:29] (Flashback) Tak**
Are you going to make
Sensei suffer even more?
**[14:34] (Flashback) Tak**
Am I going to fail
**[14:38] (Flashback) Tak**
to save him once again?
**[14:42] (Flashback) Tak**
Move...
**[14:45] (Flashback) Tak**
Move!
**[14:47] (Flashback) Tak**
Please, give me just a bit more time!
**[15:01] (Flashback) Tak**
Lend me your strength, senior student,
**[15:07] (Flashback) Tak**
so that we may save our teacher!
**[15:22] Tak**
I had no proof.
**[15:25] Tak**
But I felt no panic or hesitation, either.
**[15:33] Tak**
Our senior, and our teacher's blood,
helped me stand there once more,
**[15:41] Tak**
and I knew the reason all too well.
**[15:50] Tak**
The fact that I stayed alive by taking
in the ashes was practically a miracle.
**[15:56] Tak**
But this body's regenerative
abilities have already weakened,
**[16:01] Tak**
and it's starting to fall apart.
**[16:03] Tak**
I don't have much time left.
**[16:06] Tak**
But thanks to that,
**[16:09] Tak**
I've now become able to
do what I really want to.
***SIGN*** Tokugawa Nobunobu
**[16:22] Shi**
My earthling friends...
**[16:25] Shi**
We must never make the same mistake again.
**[16:30] Shi**
These past two years, I've done
all I can to make sure we don't.
**[16:35] Shi**
But perhaps we had already overlooked
something crucial back then...
**[16:39] Shi**
The seeds of calamity
that are sprouting today.
**[16:43] Kat**
It happened again?
**[16:45] Shi**
Yeah.
**[16:47] Shi**
They've all been major terrorist incidents.
**[16:49] Shi**
And a huge amount of Altana
was stolen in each one.
**[16:53] Shi**
Each was caused by residents of
the planet on which it occurred.
**[16:57] Shi**
People with no links to one another
**[16:59] Shi**
suddenly teamed up one day, committed
terrorism, and killed themselves.
**[17:05] Shi**
But there's one thing we've learned
while investigating their backgrounds.
**[17:10] Kat**
Are you talking about this?
**[17:13] Shi**
Katsura, you...
**[17:15] Kat**
One need only look at history to know.
**[17:18] Kat**
Any time chaos engulfs the world,
people always turn to religion.
**[17:24] Kat**
The idol they worship is the phoenix...
**[17:27] Kat**
In other words, immortality.
**[17:30] Kat**
It's spreading across Edo, too.
**[17:33] Shi**
That war was a major reason the
spread was so wide and so quick.
**[17:38] Shi**
People wanted to get back the
family and friends they had lost.
**[17:42] Shi**
And the religion worshiping
immortality sucked them all in.
**[17:47] Shi**
It was all started by some Liberation Army
members taking immortal blood with them.
**[17:54] Tak**
I spent these past two
years pursuing them.
**[17:58] Tak**
Utsuro's blood had scattered
across the world,
**[18:05] Tak**
and I wanted to destroy it all.
**[18:08] Tak**
But the seeds had already begun sprouting.
**[18:12] Tak**
They've started to understand
how to use the immortal blood.
**[18:17] Shi**
The remnants of the Tendoshu used that power
as bait to rapidly gain massive power.
**[18:24] Shi**
They said, "Believe in us,
and you will gain immortality."
**[18:29] Shi**
And they need one last
key to open that door...
**[18:35] Kat**
The reborn Utsuro, huh?
**[18:38] Tak**
They're trying to find the recipe
for all-encompassing immortality,
**[18:43] Tak**
and that heart you have is
the crux of their research.
**[18:47] Tak**
So you and I were both working toward
the same goal in different places, huh?
**[18:54] Tak**
We worried, hesitated,
**[18:57] Tak**
and in the end,
**[18:59] Tak**
we couldn't change a thing.
**[19:01] Tak**
But isn't that enough?
**[19:05] Tak**
Sensei and you have
suffered more than enough.
**[19:10] Tak**
If you wanna save him, go ahead.
**[19:12] Tak**
You can do that now.
**[19:16] Tak**
Let's just go save what
we couldn't back then.
**[19:22] Tak**
Let's save Sensei from
them and his cursed fate.
**[19:27] Tak**
This time for sure!
**[19:31] Gin**
Where is Shoyo's body now?
**[19:35] Gin**
Where is this boat headed?
**[19:38] Tak**
Edo.
**[19:40] Tak**
Their next target is Edo.
**[19:46] Shi**
What's going on?
**[19:47] Kat**
Run, Shijaku!
**[19:49] Kat**
I didn't expect them to attack me first!
**[19:52] Kat**
Immortality technology will require
massive amounts of Altana,
**[19:55] Kat**
so surely they want Earth's
Altana for themselves.
**[19:58] Shi**
You've figured out that much?
**[20:00] Kat**
Part of the reason I took this crazy position
**[20:04] Kat**
was to control the cabinet, spread a
net to every corner of the country,
**[20:08] Kat**
pick up any movements related to
Utsuro, and to prepare for it all.
**[20:14] Kat**
That was my own way of doing the right thing.
**[20:18] Kat**
Shijaku, take a different route to escape!
**[20:21] Kat**
And if I don't return,
**[20:23] Kat**
take care of Princess Soyo
and the new government!
**[20:25] Shi**
Katsura?!
**[20:27] Shi**
Wait, Katsura!
**[20:30] Kat**
Fret not, Nobunobu.
**[20:32] Kat**
I know that when I die,
the country dies with me.
**[20:36] Kat**
Do you really think I succeeded you
shoguns without being ready for that?
**[20:40] Kat**
Behold from up there in heaven...
**[20:42] Kat**
what this country and its
prime minister are capable of!
**[20:45] Kat**
Let's roll!
**[20:47] Oki**
Katsura!
**[20:48] Shi**
Wait, who are you?!
**[20:50] Shi**
The enemy's not who I expected at all!
**[20:52] Shi**
What's worse, most of them are coming my way!
**[20:55] Shi**
Is this how you do things?!
**[21:08] Kag**
What are you gonna do, Pachi-boy?
**[21:12] Kag**
He said Utsuro's still alive,
**[21:14] Kag**
and that he needs to find
Gin-chan, so he wants our help.
**[21:18] Kag**
It's not like we know
where he is now, either.
**[21:23] Shi**
If Utsuro's alive, Gin-san
must've already made his move.
**[21:29] Shi**
Actually, that's probably why
he left Edo in the first place.
**[21:32] Kag**
To kill him again?
**[21:35] Shin**
I don't know.
**[21:37] Shin**
But maybe Gin-san didn't know, either.
**[21:44] Shin**
*What would I do?*
**[21:46] Shin**
* If someone dear to me from*
* the very bottom of my heart*
**[21:51] Shin**
*became an enemy of the world,*
**[21:55] Shin**
*would I fight them to protect the world?*
**[21:59] Shin**
* Or would I believe in them, even if*
* it turned the whole world against me?*
**[22:04] Shin**
*I don't know.*
**[22:07] Shin**
*But there's one thing I do know I'd want...*
**[22:13] Shin**
*I'd want to see them again.*
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:51] Gin**
Dun dun!
***SIGN*** Dun Dun
***SIGN*** Dun dun.
***SIGN*** Dun dun.
# 366 - Dun Dun
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!!!
**[00:06] Gin**
Oh, man.
**[00:08] Gin**
Whoever said children grow even
without their parents was a wise man.
**[00:13] Gin**
I'm back for a little bit, Edo.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** Dun Dun
**[01:54] Gin**
So, where's the enemy?
**[01:58] Tak**
Everywhere around you.
***SIGN*** Oedo Construction
**[02:00] Tak**
Even as they propagated their
religion across the universe,
**[02:03] Tak**
they don't have a base on any planet.
**[02:07] Tak**
Mobile Cathedral Kuyo.
**[02:09] Tak**
A warship wandering the skies is their HQ.
**[02:13] Tak**
It can't be detected by the
naked eye or by radar,
**[02:16] Tak**
but there's no doubt it's
in Terran skies right now.
**[02:19] Tak**
And that's where Sensei is.
**[02:22] Gin**
How are we gonna stop them?
**[02:23] Tak**
Who do you think I am?
**[02:26] Tak**
I know what third-rate terrorists are
thinking like the back of my own hand.
**[02:31] Tak**
There's something I need to do before
they make their move, though.
**[02:36] Tak**
Use that time to take care
of your own business.
**[02:38] Gin**
Huh?
**[02:39] Tak**
It's your first time back in two years.
**[02:41] Tak**
Aren't there some old faces you want to see?
**[02:45] Gin**
Are you stupid?
**[02:46] Gin**
How can I face them? What do I tell them?
**[02:49] Gin**
"Hey, I'm here to save the monster
you all risked your lives to defeat"?
**[02:53] Gin**
What do you think my face is, Jump Square?
**[02:57] Tak**
Well, do as you wish.
**[03:01] Ymz**
There's no doubt about it.
**[03:03] Ymz**
The Odd Jobs boss has
fallen to the dark side!
**[03:07] Ymz**
With this happening so close to the finale,
**[03:09] Ymz**
it must be a case where the mankind-protecting
protag despairs in our foolishness
**[03:14] Ymz**
and decides to wipe everything
out! It's the Devilman pattern!
**[03:17] Hij**
Zaki, I didn't ask for your delusions.
**[03:20] Hij**
I'm about to despair in my subordinate's
foolishness and wipe out his salary, too.
**[03:24] Ymz**
Who's a foolish subordinate?
**[03:25] Ymz**
Who do you think made it
possible to follow them this far?
**[03:29] Hij**
Right. You said you could fly, so I got
on your back and tried to follow the boat.
**[03:33] (Flashback) Hij**
Go, Mobcop!
**[03:35] Hij**
So you made it possible for me to nearly
die five times when you ran out of gas.
**[03:40] Ymz**
Look, that was because I couldn't refuel.
**[03:42] Hij**
Why is Robocop's fuel anpan?
**[03:44] Ymz**
Plus, the bean paste was
coarse, not strained.
**[03:46] Ymz**
I can't recharge like that, Tony!
**[03:48] Hij**
Who're you calling Tony?
**[03:50] Hij**
Your mechanical specs and brain
specs are totally out of sync!
**[03:54] Hij**
Don't take your eyes off them.
**[03:56] Hij**
We'll follow them and see what they're up to.
**[03:58] Ymz**
What? But if we waste time, the
Demon Army and Satan Army will—
**[04:01] Hij**
Armageddon isn't gonna happen.
**[04:03] Ymz**
Are you saying you'll have
faith in the boss, then?
**[04:07] Hij**
That's not it.
**[04:08] Hij**
Figuring out their goal comes first.
**[04:11] Ymz**
And what if he's plotting something evil?
**[04:17] Hij**
I'll cut him down.
**[04:18] Hij**
That's our duty as the Shinsengumi he saved.
**[04:25] Ymz**
Hijikata-san...
**[04:27] Ymz**
The Shinsengumi doesn't
exist anymore, though.
**[04:30] Hij**
I said not to take your eyes off them.
**[04:34] Hij**
They're splitting up.
**[04:35] Hij**
We'll also split up and follow them both!
**[04:37] Ymz**
Understood!
**[04:38] Ymz**
Then I'll follow Takasugi!
**[04:40] Ymz**
And I'll follow the boss!
**[04:42] Ymz**
Hijikata-san, you go buy some anpan!
**[04:45] Hij**
Got it! Strained, right?
**[04:47] Hij**
Like hell!
**[04:49] Hij**
Why're you splitting into two?
Why am I your lackey?
**[04:52] Ymz**
Oh, sorry.
**[04:53] Ymz**
I forgot I had a shadowing mode.
**[04:57] Yij**
I'll buy some anpan from over here!
**[05:00] Yij**
Hijikata, you go buy the anpan that-a-way!
**[05:03] Hij**
Got it! The ones with seeds
sprinkled on top, right?
**[05:06] Hij**
Why're we splitting up to buy anpan?!
**[05:09] Hij**
Look, you can stay like that.
**[05:10] Hij**
You can be Hijikata-san if you keep
it natural! Just follow Odd Jobs!
**[05:13] Ymz**
Understood!
**[05:14] Ymz**
I should be the natural Hijikata-san, right?
**[05:16] Hij**
I bought you anpan, sir!
**[05:18] Hij**
Please stop! No more natural Hijikata-san!
**[05:21] Hij**
Put some clothes on!
**[05:23] Hij**
Crap!
**[05:41] Gin**
Actually, never mind.
**[05:42] Gin**
If I run into anyone, I don't think
just sunglasses will help disguise me.
**[05:54] Gin**
Granny!
**[05:55] Gin**
If I buy these briefs, will you
do me a huge favor?! Please?!
**[06:01] Tae**
Oh, that's a nice swimsuit.
**[06:04] Tae**
Maybe I should pick it up for Shin-chan.
**[06:06] Gran**
You know how to pick 'em, miss.
**[06:09] Gran**
They're all the next big thing,
the latest and hottest in fashion.
**[06:12] Tae**
Really?
**[06:14] Tae**
Yeah, the designs sure are novel.
**[06:16] Tae**
This one looks like boxers,
**[06:18] Tae**
this one's got something sticking out,
**[06:20] Tae**
and this one's Hentai Kamen.
**[06:23] Hij**
*Why'd you join the mannequin parade?!*
**[06:26] Ymz**
*Hijikata-san, that's Shinpachi-kun's sister.*
**[06:29] Ymz**
*Looks like the boss doesn't want to be seen.*
**[06:32] Hij**
*But he's sticking out like a sore thumb!*
**[06:34] Hij**
* And we've gotta hurry up*
* and go after Takasugi...*
**[06:38] Hij**
*You're in the parade, too?!*
**[06:40] Hij**
*Huh?*
**[06:41] Hij**
*Are you kidding me? What is he doing?*
**[06:43] Hij**
* Is that how the smug bastard's been*
* throwing us off all this time?*
**[06:48] Hij**
*He's not looking up at all.*
**[06:50] Hij**
*I bet his face is beet red.*
**[06:52] Ymz**
* Hijikata-san, you're the pot calling the*
* kettle black right now. Could you stop?*
**[06:56] Tae**
I'd like to take a closer look.
**[06:59] Gran**
Sure, go ahead and take it off.
**[07:01] Tae**
But, you know...
**[07:03] Gran**
Oh, is it sticking out?
**[07:07] Gran**
It's stuck on something. I can't take it off.
**[07:10] Gran**
Looks like it'd be faster to just mash it down!
**[07:16] Hij**
*E-Endure it, Yamazaki!*
**[07:18] Gran**
Didn't work, huh? Could you
grab the hammer over there?
**[07:21] Hij**
*Hammer?!*
**[07:23] Tae**
Oh, but I don't know if I'm
going to buy it or not.
**[07:26] Gran**
Don't hold back.
**[07:28] Gran**
We've got tons of spare mannequins and b*lls.
**[07:31] Tae**
Oh, I'm not. It's just...
**[07:37] Tae**
This is what I wanted to see.
**[07:38] Hij**
*Mobcop!*
**[07:40] Gran**
Oh, the cap?
**[07:42] Tae**
This isn't what I pictured, though.
**[07:46] Tae**
I'll put it back on top.
**[07:48] Hij**
*That's the wrong "top"!*
**[07:50] Tae**
Huh? Is this how it looked?
**[07:52] Tae**
Wasn't this the right place?
**[07:54] Gran**
Nah, it was over here.
**[07:56] Tae**
No, wasn't this over here?
**[07:58] Gran**
Nah, over here.
**[08:00] Hij**
*Where'd Yamazaki go?*
**[08:03] Hij**
*How'd they even turn him into this?!*
**[08:05] Tae**
Oh, I'm interested in these sunglasses, too.
**[08:08] Tae**
May I take them off?
**[08:14] Tae**
The wind's blowing away the merchandise!
**[08:16] Hij**
*He ran for it!*
**[08:17] Hij**
*That bastard's trying to save his own skin!*
**[08:20] Hij**
*Guess I'll join him...*
**[08:32] Tae**
Thank goodness.
**[08:33] Tae**
You nearly lost your merchandise.
**[08:36] Gran**
Yeah...
**[08:38] Gran**
I think we lost some lives instead.
***SIGN*** Kodokan Dojo
**[08:46] Hij**
*How'd things end up this way?*
**[08:49] Hij**
* Wasn't this place supposed to be*
* a rundown swordsmanship dojo?*
**[08:53] Hij**
*What's with them?*
**[08:56] Hij**
*What the hell is TAEZAP?*
**[09:15] Tae**
Okay, everyone.
**[09:17] Tae**
That's it for today's training.
**[09:19] Hij**
* Uh, what training? Those fatties*
* were just spinning on a wheel!*
**[09:22] Tae**
You can take your Baagen-Dazs
rewards and go home!
**[09:25] Hij**
*Like hell they'll lose any weight!*
**[09:27] Hij**
* You want to keep them here*
* forever, don't you?!*
**[09:29] Tae**
Sorry I kept you waiting, Kyu-chan.
**[09:31] Kyu**
Don't be. It was interesting.
**[09:33] Kyu**
Swordsmanship exercises, huh?
**[09:36] Kyu**
Tae-chan, maybe it's people like you who
can keep the sword alive in these times.
**[09:42] Kyu**
I should try my best to keep up, too.
**[09:45] Gin**
*Kyubei...*
**[09:47] Kyu**
But are you okay with this?
**[09:48] Tae**
What do you mean?
**[09:49] Kyu**
I was sure Shinpachi-kun would be
the one to take over this dojo.
**[09:53] Kyu**
It's been two years already.
**[09:56] Kyu**
Is he planning to succeed that guy instead?
***SIGN*** Odd Jobs Gin-chan
**[10:01] Tae**
That's fine by me.
**[10:03] Tae**
If that's what he truly wants to do.
**[10:08] Kyu**
I see...
**[10:10] Tae**
How's everyone on your end?
**[10:15] Kyu**
Same as ever.
**[10:17] Kyu**
We went through a lot
in these two years, too,
**[10:20] Kyu**
but even in a new era, all we can do
is keep the swordsman spirit alive.
**[10:25] Kyu**
That's our clan's pride.
**[10:31] (Flashback) Kyu**
I think I'm ready for an arranged marriage.
**[10:34] (Flashback) Bim**
Kyubei, you...
**[10:37] (Flashback) Kyu**
Don't worry. I won't bring
any girls home anymore.
**[10:43] (Flashback) Kyu**
If there's someone out there willing
to live together with my sword,
**[10:47] (Flashback) Kyu**
then I'll gladly die with them.
**[10:52] (Flashback) Bim**
I see.
**[11:04] Kyu**
He really wanted to see that guy again.
**[11:07] Kyu**
So I'm glad he didn't come back.
**[11:11] Kyu**
Who knows? I might've actually
been married off to him.
**[11:17] Tae**
But I would've wanted him to see it.
**[11:20] Tae**
You in a wedding dress,
and what Edo looks like now.
**[11:25] Tae**
Well, let's get going.
**[11:27] Tae**
Our plan today is to shop for
marriage-meeting kimonos, right?
**[11:30] Kyu**
Oh, right.
**[11:32] Kyu**
But first, let me put the mannequins away.
**[11:40] Gin**
* You haven't gotten over*
* your fear of men at all!*
**[11:45] Tae**
So, what was the cause with your grandfather?
**[11:48] Kyu**
Food poisoning.
**[11:50] Kyu**
He promised not to eat things off
the street or gather trash anymore,
**[11:54] Kyu**
but he's probably still picking up
trash somewhere as we speak.
**[11:58] Gin**
*And this guy's still alive?!*
***SIGN*** Mon-Fiction
***SIGN*** Mon-Fiction
**[12:12] Bim**
Well, my son and grandkid
are all grown up now,
**[12:16] Bim**
so I decided to retire in
leisure, doing what I want.
**[12:21] D**
And that's rummaging through garbage,
despite repeated complaints from people?
**[12:26] Bim**
Everyone calls it that,
***SIGN*** The Man Who
Lives With Trash
**[12:28] Bim**
but I've never once thought
of these as trash.
**[12:32] D**
So it's your way of warning modern
society that they're too wasteful?
**[12:36] Bim**
I don't want to be that sanctimonious,
**[12:39] Bim**
but take a look at this, Director.
**[12:43] Bim**
This is something I picked up today.
**[12:45] Bim**
But give it some fancy clothes
**[12:47] Bim**
and a fancy logo,
***SIGN*** The Third Silver Soul Brothers
**[12:53] Bim**
and it can be used as a roach swatter.
**[12:55] Bim**
And look, there's another over here.
**[12:57] Bim**
We can write something like this on it...
***SIGN*** Youtuber
**[13:03] Bim**
and transform it into a fly swatter.
**[13:05] Bim**
There's one more.
**[13:10] Bim**
How do you think we can
give it a new purpose?
**[13:14] D**
We can write "Director" on it and
use it as a sandbag for tackling.
**[13:19] Bim**
That's not a bad idea,
but the right answer is...
***SIGN*** Domoto
**[13:22] Bim**
Write that,
***SIGN*** Tsuyoshi
**[13:24] Bim**
and we can make a bunch of money.
**[13:31] Bim**
Wh-What's going on?
**[13:33] Bim**
Th-The pieces of trash are...
**[13:34] D**
* Those pieces of trash looked*
* truly alive to us, too.*
**[13:40] D**
* Like the old man said, maybe they*
* could still serve a purpose...*
**[13:46] D**
*As trash that can remove other trash.*
***SIGN*** Mon-Fiction
***SIGN*** The Man Who Lives With Trash
***SIGN*** Fin
**[13:55] Gin**
I'm out of that mannequin hell at last!
**[13:58] Gin**
Takasugi, I didn't expect
you to join in, too.
**[14:01] Gin**
Is that how you've been running
from the bakufu until now?
**[14:05] Gin**
I'm amazed you have the gall to say
you'll destroy the world like that.
**[14:08] Gin**
Hey!
**[14:08] Gin**
Say something, Takasugi...
**[14:16] Gin**
Takasugi, since when?
**[14:19] Gin**
Oh, is that why you want
to destroy the world?
**[14:22] Hij**
*Yeah, right! Dumbass!*
**[14:24] Gin**
Hang on. Try saying your catchphrase.
**[14:27] Tak**
I'll just destroy this rotten world.
**[14:30] Gin**
Louder! Put your heart in it!
**[14:32] Tak**
I'll just destroy this stinky world!
**[14:35] Gin**
Louder! In your own words!
**[14:37] G**
Ni hao fan a, ben dan!
**[14:37] Top**
"Drop it already, jerk!"
**[14:39] G**
Wo zen me zhi dao a, bai chi!
**[14:39] Top2**
"How would I know, dumbass?!"
**[14:40] Gin**
Okay, got it.
**[14:42] Gin**
Takasugi, you've been going to
a language school, haven't you?
**[14:44] Hij**
*No, he's just someone else!*
**[14:46] G**
There I was, doing my job, when
a one-eyed man threatened me.
**[14:50] Hij**
* I see. So that was already*
* somebody else, huh?*
**[14:54] Hij**
* I should've known it was too*
* dumb a plan for Takasugi.*
**[14:58] Gin**
Then where's the real one
now? What's he doing?
**[15:01] G**
Mom, that bear isn't giving me a balloon.
**[15:03] G**
Probably doing my job in my place.
**[15:06] Hij**
*That's just as dumb!*
**[15:10] Gin**
All right. I'll use this disguise for now.
**[15:13] Gin**
He may be a terrorist, but
he's better than Hentai Kamen.
**[15:18] Gin**
* Uh, this is the first thing that happens*
* after Takasugi Shinsfake is born?!*
**[15:22] Gin**
*Just how much do people hate him?!*
**[15:24] Sac**
I dare you to take one more
step, Takasugi Shinsuke.
**[15:28] Sac**
I'll riddle you with holes!
**[15:33] Gin**
*Sacchan?*
**[15:35] Gin**
Y-You've got the wrong guy, miss.
**[15:39] Gin**
Takasugi's one-eyed, remember?
**[15:41] Gin**
Look, I have both my eyes...
**[15:43] Sac**
Sorry, but I don't care
how many eyes you have.
**[15:49] Gin**
Th-That so?
**[15:51] Gin**
I'm impressed you noticed this
fake eye from so far away.
**[15:56] Gin**
*Dun dun!*
**[15:56] Gin**
That's right. I'm the man famous for
"I'll destroy the world," Trold Takasugi.
**[16:01] Gin**
What about it?
**[16:02] Hij**
* He's going with that? He's trying*
* to get through this as Shinsfake?*
**[16:07] Sac**
Where is Sakata Gintoki now?
**[16:12] Gin**
Didn't he abandon Edo?
He won't be coming back, then.
**[16:16] Gin**
*Dun dun!*
**[16:17] Gin**
He never laid roots in any one place, anyway.
**[16:22] Sac**
Don't you get it? I'm telling you
that playing dumb won't work.
**[16:24] Gin**
Look in my eyes.
**[16:26] Gin**
*Dun dun!*
**[16:27] Gin**
Do I look like I'm playing dumb?
**[16:30] Hij**
*That's all you look like!*
**[16:32] Hij**
*And you're dun dun-ing too much, Shinsfake.*
**[16:34] Gin**
I never lie.
**[16:36] Gin**
*Dun dun!*
**[16:36] Gin**
Indians never lie, either.
**[16:39] Hij**
* Did that really need a dun dun? You're*
* leaning too hard on that, Shinsfake!*
**[16:42] Gin**
Can I go now? I need to duntroy the world.
**[16:46] Hij**
*What the hell does "duntroy" mean?!*
**[16:49] Sac**
Hold it.
**[16:50] Gin**
Give it up.
**[16:52] Gin**
Forget about him already.
**[16:54] Gin**
There's no point in waiting for him.
**[16:56] Sac**
Oh, really?
**[16:57] Sac**
Then I'll forget how to neutralize
the poison in your body too, okay?
**[17:06] Gin**
*W-Was it back then?!*
**[17:08] Sac**
If you leave now, you'll be destroyed
before the world. Are you okay with that?
**[17:13] Sac**
*Dun dun!*
**[17:14] Sac**
You'll die spewing excreta from
every orifice in your body.
**[17:18] Hij**
*A real dun dun!*
**[17:20] Hij**
*That's the correct way to dun dun!*
**[17:21] Gin**
*Dun dun!*
**[17:22] Gin**
Come to think of it, I saw a
silver-haired guy over there earlier.
**[17:26] Hij**
*That's his most convincing dun dun yet.*
**[17:29] Sac**
*Dun dun!*
**[17:30] Sac**
Lead me there.
**[17:32] Sac**
I'll follow the crap you leave on
the trail, Dumpsel and Peetel.
**[17:36] Hij**
*But it's still no match for a real dun dun.*
**[17:40] Sac**
I'm not giving you the antidote
until I see Sakata Gintoki.
**[17:45] Gin**
You need an escort? How pampered are you?
**[17:48] Gin**
But can you really tame this dark beast?
**[17:51] Gin**
Did you remember to bring a
plastic bag and water with you?
**[17:54] Sac**
Of course. It's basic etiquette for
an owner to clean up after their pet.
**[17:58] Hij**
* Is he a chihuahua?*
* He's just a black chihuahua!*
**[18:01] Hij**
* He can't even walk!*
* What's the chihuahua gonna do?*
**[18:04] [SONG] ---**
Oedo Mart
All Noodles 20% Off
**[18:05] Gin**
I-I think I saw Gintoki
in that convenience store.
**[18:09] Gin**
*Chun chun!*
**[18:10] Hij**
* What the hell is "chun chun"?!*
* The chihuahua's at his limit!*
**[18:14] Gin**
Huh? I don't see him.
**[18:17] Gin**
I guess I should check the toilet, too.
**[18:22] Shuwa**
Occupied.
**[18:24] Gin**
Oh, sorry about that.
**[18:26] [SONG] ---**
Oedo Mart
All Noodles 20% Off
**[18:26] Gin**
L-Looks like this is the
wrong convenience store.
**[18:30] Gin**
That one, maybe?
**[18:32] G**
Occupied.
**[18:33] G**
Occupied!
**[18:35] [SONG] Sign**
Occupied.
**[18:37] G**
Oc...
**[18:37] G**
Oc...
**[18:38] G**
Oc...
**[18:38] G**
Oc...
**[18:39] G**
Occupied.
**[18:43] Gin**
Don't tell me...
**[18:45] Gin**
You put ninja in every one of Edo's toilets?
**[18:47] Gin**
How could you?!
**[18:50] Sac**
There wasn't just one guy
who vanished without a word.
**[19:01] (Flashback) Sac**
Where are you going, Zenzo?
**[19:06] (Flashback) Zen**
Now that the world's peaceful,
**[19:08] (Flashback) Zen**
I'm the biggest danger to the princess.
**[19:12] (Flashback) Zen**
And besides, the Oniwaban have you, Sarutobi.
**[19:20] (Flashback) Sac**
Why are all you men like this?
**[19:23] (Flashback) Sac**
Can't you say "wait for me" before you go?
**[19:27] (Flashback) Zen**
Sarutobi.
**[19:28] (Flashback) Zen**
Even if we did, would you really
just sit tight and wait?
**[19:35] (Flashback) Sac**
I guess not.
**[19:39] (Flashback) Sac**
So I want your help, guys.
**[19:42] (Flashback) Sac**
I may not be as strong as Zenzo, our leader,
**[19:46] (Flashback) Sac**
but with your help, we can do this!
**[19:52] (Flashback) Sac**
As Ninja Master Sarutobi Ayame, I order you!
**[19:55] (Flashback) Sac**
Find Sakata Gintoki and have him marry me!
**[19:58] Hij**
* All she did was use the*
* ninja for her own goals!*
**[20:02] Sac**
I will not let you have Sakata Gintoki.
**[20:05] Sac**
This is his home.
**[20:09] Sac**
If he won't return, I'll
bring him back by force.
**[20:12] Sac**
Because he never even told me
to wait for him, after all.
**[20:18] Gin**
Fine, I get it.
**[20:21] Gin**
Do you wanna see him that badly?
**[20:25] Hij**
*That peaceful look on his face...*
**[20:28] Gin**
You can see him, then.
**[20:31] Gin**
I saw him in the underwear
section of that store.
**[20:37] Hij**
* Wait a second... Is he trying*
* to change his underwear?*
**[20:40] Hij**
* Did he let it all go? Is that*
* a smile of satisfaction?*
**[20:43] Gin**
Follow me.
**[20:45] Hij**
*He's walking weird! His sash is way too low!*
**[20:48] Hij**
*Is he trying to stop it from dripping down?!*
**[20:51] Sac**
Isn't the poison affecting you?
**[20:53] Gin**
Did you really think it'd
stop me, *the* Takasugi?
**[20:56] Gin**
I expunged it all through my anus.
**[20:58] Hij**
* You're just confessing*
* to shitting your pants!*
**[21:02] Sac**
I don't see him anywhere.
**[21:04] Gin**
Hey, piggy!
**[21:06] Sac**
That voice!
**[21:09] Gin**
Hey, you can keep the change,
**[21:10] Gin**
so hurry up and get me a full set
of clothes, including underwear!
**[21:13] Hij**
* He's so slow! This is his*
* chance, but he's so slow!*
**[21:16] Hij**
*He really did let it all go!*
**[21:19] Hij**
*Paper diapers is all you could afford?!*
**[21:22] Sac**
Takasugi!
**[21:23] Sac**
Where are you?!
**[21:28] Gin**
The chain got caught on a mannequin!
**[21:30] Sac**
Over there?!
**[21:34] Sac**
Found y—
**[21:36] Hij**
*He went back to square one!*
**[21:39] Sac**
Huh? What're you doing here, Tsukky?
**[21:44] Tsu**
Well, I accompanied Kyubei
here on her shopping trip,
**[21:48] Tsu**
and I wound up tangled in this weird chain.
**[21:50] Kyu**
Tae-chan, why'd I have to
take my underwear off, too?
**[21:53] Tae**
You aren't supposed to wear
panties under kimono.
**[21:56] Kyu**
But I'm just trying these on...
**[21:58] Kyu**
Huh?
**[22:00] Kyu**
Tsukuyo-dono, I can't find my underwear.
**[22:03] Kyu**
Did you see...
**[22:14] Gin**
*Dun dun!*
***SIGN*** To Be Continued
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
**[23:49] Tae**
She says she'll avenge your panties.
***SIGN*** There Are Lines Even
Villains Can't Cross
**[23:51] Tsu**
This is how Yoshiwara does things now.
***SIGN*** Kyubei's panties have been sullied!!
***SIGN*** How will Shinsfake overcome this perilous situation?
***SIGN*** And those of you nervously excited for other reasons,
***SIGN*** hold on to that feeling and look forward to the next episode...
# 367 - There Are Lines Even Villains Can't Cross
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GYQ4MKDZ6/gintama)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Watch the Silver Soul arc in a bright
room and at a safe distance from the TV!!!!!
**[00:09] Hij**
Damn, I totally lost them.
**[00:13] Hij**
Hey, Yamazaki. Get your ass here, now.
**[00:16] Hij**
I'll give you the exact location later.
**[00:20] Sei**
Looking for something, sir?
**[00:22] Sei**
If it's cute girls you want,
I know just the place.
**[00:27] Hij**
I'm looking for a woman with an
eyepatch, one with a facial scar,
**[00:30] Hij**
a perverted ninja, and a female gorilla.
***SIGN*** Yoshiwara Guide Service
**[00:32] [Messenger] Sign**
Trust and Excellence
No.1 in Customer Satisfaction!!
**[00:34] Sei**
Give it up, sir.
**[00:36] Sei**
Ain't an ordinary man in this world
who can handle those crazies.
**[00:38] Sei**
You won't even have butt hair
when they're done with you.
**[00:41] Hij**
That sounds terrifying.
**[00:43] Hij**
And you're working in such a terrifying town.
**[00:47] Hij**
How old are you, kid?
**[00:48] Sei**
Th-The hell?!
***SIGN*** Yoshiwara Guide Service
**[00:48] [Messenger] Sign**
Trust and Excellence
No.1 in Customer Satisfaction!!
**[00:49] Sei**
You can't show that off here!
Have some common sense!
**[00:53] Sei**
I bet you're not popular with the ladies—
**[00:55] Sei**
Ow!
**[00:56] Hin**
What are you yelping about?
**[00:58] Hin**
Good grief.
**[01:01] Hin**
You're the one ruining this place's
reputation with a lack of common sense, Seita.
**[01:06] Sei**
Mom...
**[01:08] Sac**
The Shangri-La of Yoshiwara is now a
government-recognized tourist spot, huh?
**[01:13] Tsu**
Two years ago, this place sheltered
civilians from the flames of war.
**[01:18] Tsu**
I suppose that paid off.
**[01:20] Sac**
But even in broad daylight,
**[01:22] Sac**
the relationship between men and
women ain't all that different.
**[01:27] Sac**
Day or night,
**[01:30] Sac**
the Hyakka will always be
the champions of women.
**[01:33] Hin**
There you have it.
**[01:34] Hin**
The one running this town now
**[01:36] Hin**
is the former Courtesan of Death
turned Courtesan of the Sun, Tsukuyo.
**[01:41] Hin**
Make sure you never disrespect
women where her scar can see it.
**[01:47] Hin**
You'll be whisked away to a
world with no day or night.
***SIGN*** Gintama
***SIGN*** Silver Soul
***SIGN*** If you missed the last episode,
***SIGN*** this visual probably shocked you, but don't worry.
***SIGN*** This guy right here?
***SIGN*** That's Gin-san.
***SIGN*** Silver Soul Arc
***SIGN*** There Are Lines Even Villains Can't Cross
**[03:40] Tsu**
An enemy to women is an enemy to Yoshiwara.
**[03:43] Tsu**
Let me teach that guy a lesson.
**[03:45] Tae**
Aren't you glad, Kyu-chan?
**[03:48] Tae**
She says she'll get revenge for your panties.
**[03:50] Sac**
What? Those were your panties?
**[03:52] Sac**
I thought you'd be wearing
a loincloth or something,
**[03:55] Sac**
but your underwear is actually normal, huh?
**[03:56] Tae**
Anyway, it's good that there
are no stains or anything.
**[04:00] Tae**
It's truly important to change
your underwear every day.
**[04:03] Sac**
Huh? Do I see some hair over there?
**[04:06] Tae**
Nah, that's the hair on
his head sticking out.
**[04:10] Sac**
Huh? But I see a red stain there...
**[04:12] Tae**
That's from when we beat him up.
**[04:14] Kyu**
How long are you gonna keep wearing
that, anyway? Give it back!
**[04:19] Kyu**
Not the diapers!
**[04:21] Tae**
He's grown completely defiant.
**[04:23] Tae**
Takasugi, was it?
**[04:25] Tae**
I hear he used to have a final-boss
aura whenever he appeared.
**[04:29] Sac**
A real shocker, right?
**[04:30] Sac**
What happened to him?
**[04:32] Sac**
Where did he go wrong?
**[04:34] Tae**
Must've been when he put
those panties on his head.
**[04:37] Tae**
There are lines even villains can't cross.
**[04:40] Sac**
Of course you'd be demoted from final
boss if you wore panties on your head.
**[04:43] Tae**
No, maybe he wore them because
he was demoted from final boss.
**[04:48] Sac**
I just happened to be having a
hard time with him, actually.
**[04:51] Sac**
I believe he came to Edo with Gin-san.
**[04:56] Sac**
But he just wouldn't talk.
**[04:58] Sac**
I hope you can get him to spill where
Gin-san is while you teach him a lesson.
**[05:03] Kyu**
Gintoki's back in Edo?
**[05:04] Tae**
Why won't he come see us, then?
**[05:07] Sac**
I don't know. Maybe he has his reasons.
**[05:10] Hij**
* It's because he's over there*
* with panties on his head.*
**[05:14] Hij**
*Shinsfake's got his back to the wall now.*
**[05:17] Gin**
Stupid broads. It's pointless
trying to embarrass me.
**[05:22] Sac**
Uh, I'd say you're just
embarrassing yourself here.
**[05:25] Gin**
Because I'm both Takasugi
and not at the same time.
**[05:30] Gin**
In other words, no matter how much
you humiliate Takasugi Shinsuke,
**[05:33] Gin**
it won't hurt me at all...
**[05:35] Gin**
Hey, wait! Hear me out!
**[05:39] Gin**
C-Come on! That hurts, damn it!
**[05:41] H**
So it does hurt you after all?
**[05:43] Gin**
That's not it! I meant it
wouldn't hurt me mentally!
**[05:46] Tae**
Uh, I have no idea what you're talking about.
**[05:49] Sac**
You keep spouting delusional
lines without backing them up.
**[05:52] Sac**
That's why you were demoted from final boss.
**[05:54] Gin**
That's going too far! Apologize to Takasugi!
**[05:56] Hij**
*No, you apologize.*
**[05:57] Gin**
Fine! Bring on the torture or whatever!
**[06:01] Gin**
Just know that it'll make you
bigger disgraces than me!
**[06:06] Gin**
Worse than a terrorist in diapers with
panties on his head! Serves you right!
**[06:09] Gin**
What's wrong?
**[06:10] Gin**
Don't tell me you hung me up here without
being prepared to follow through.
**[06:14] Tsu**
Sorry, but Yoshiwara
ain't a place of torture.
**[06:18] Tsu**
This is a red-light district.
**[06:20] Tsu**
We entertain men here, not make them suffer.
**[06:28] Gin**
You liar! This is water torture!
**[06:30] Tsu**
That ain't water.
**[06:34] Gin**
L-Lotion?
**[06:37] Gin**
Tallgeese!
**[06:42] W**
Welcome!
**[06:45] Tsu**
Ladies of Yoshiwara, we
have a bigshot guest today.
**[06:49] Tsu**
Use your skills and experience
to give him the warmest welcome.
**[06:54] Gin**
H-Hey, wait! What's all this?
**[06:56] W**
Hello there, handsome!
**[06:59] Gin**
Hey, Gran! Where are you touching?!
**[07:01] Gin**
Stop it! Gross!
**[07:02] Gin**
Oh... Wait... Not there!
**[07:06] Sac**
Huh? What's going on here, Tsukky?
**[07:08] Tsu**
This is how Yoshiwara does things now.
**[07:11] Tsu**
Demons of lust are made to drown in women.
**[07:16] W**
Welcome!
**[07:18] W**
Welcome back, Master!
**[07:22] Tsu**
And what lies beyond that lust...
**[07:25] Tae**
Oh, he's back.
**[07:32] Gin**
What's sexy about boobs, anyway?
**[07:35] Gin**
Why are there two of them?
**[07:37] Tae**
*He's a sage now.*
**[07:38] Gin**
Hmm? What's this cloth doing here?
**[07:41] Gin**
Get it off.
**[07:42] Kyu**
How could you?!
**[07:43] Tae**
* Freed from his worldly desires,*
* he's at the gates of enlightenment.*
**[07:47] Tsu**
Hey, has some of your evil been washed away?
**[07:49] Tsu**
Then answer me.
**[07:51] Tsu**
Is it true that you were
traveling with Gintoki?
**[07:55] Gin**
As I am now, both that and boobs
come across as pair of trifling matters.
**[08:01] Gin**
Speaking of which, why
do boobs come in pairs?
**[08:04] Sac**
Our sage has lost interest in everything.
**[08:07] Sac**
And why does he keep talking about boobs?
**[08:09] Tae**
Let's make him take another
lap and forget about boobs.
**[08:12] Kyu**
Wait. Two laps, one for each boob.
**[08:20] Hij**
*Uh, the enlightened one is screaming.*
**[08:23] Sac**
Three laps around hell will
surely make him a better man.
**[08:26] Tsu**
Don't call it hell, Sarutobi!
**[08:28] Tae**
Oh, he's back from his pilgrimage.
**[08:30] Tsu**
Don't call it a pilgrimage, Otae!
**[08:36] Tae**
*God?*
**[08:37] Gin**
I am naught.
***SIGN*** I am naught.
**[08:39] Gin**
I am empty.
***SIGN*** I am empty.
**[08:40] Sac**
Uh, I think we went way too far.
**[08:43] Tae**
A lap for each boob was too much for him.
**[08:45] Tae**
We should've left one boob.
**[08:48] Gin**
I hath no interest in boobs.
***SIGN*** I hath no interest in boobs.
**[08:51] Tae**
See?
**[08:52] Kyu**
You know, he still seems
to be hung up on boobs.
**[08:55] Tsu**
Hey, is Gintoki...
**[08:57] Gin**
All is vanity. All is vanity.
***SIGN*** All is vanity.
***SIGN*** All is vanity.
**[08:59] Tsu**
Nope. We're not getting anything out of him.
**[09:01] Gin**
I am naught.
***SIGN*** I am naught.
**[09:03] Gin**
I am empty.
***SIGN*** I am empty.
**[09:05] Gin**
Boobs art two.
***SIGN*** Boobs art two.
**[09:06] Kyu**
Look, his head's filled
with nothing but boobs!
**[09:08] Sac**
Oh, well.
**[09:10] Sac**
Let's stimulate his lust
and turn him back a little.
**[09:13] Sac**
Tsukky, take the grannies' place in
there and let him fondle your boobs.
**[09:18] Tsu**
Why me?!
**[09:19] Sac**
Well, I can't do it. I'm
getting married to Gin-san.
**[09:22] Sac**
And Kyubei-san can't handle
being touched by a man.
**[09:25] Tae**
Sarutobi-san, why was I not considered?
**[09:29] Gin**
Tae doth be naught.
***SIGN*** Tae doth be naught
**[09:30] Gin**
Boobs art zero.
***SIGN*** Boobs art
***SIGN*** zero.
**[09:32] Tae**
Hey! What happened to "boobs art two"?
**[09:34] Tae**
What do you mean, "zero"?!
**[09:36] Tae**
Now I'm mad. I'm gonna go.
**[09:38] Kyu**
Wait, Tae-chan!
**[09:39] Tae**
Don't stop me. I have my
pride as a woman, too.
**[09:42] Kyu**
That's not it.
**[09:44] Kyu**
Okay, I'm on standby.
**[09:45] Sac**
How would you fondling her help?
**[09:48] Sac**
Kyubei-san...
**[09:49] Sac**
You said you were ready for arranged
marriage, but you haven't changed at all.
**[09:52] Kyu**
But I can't let that pervert defile Tae-chan!
**[09:55] Tsu**
Okay, fine.
**[09:56] Tsu**
You're right. This is a job for me.
**[09:59] Tae**
Tsukuyo-san?
**[10:06] Gin**
Why?
***SIGN*** Why?
***SIGN*** Why go so far...
**[10:07] Gin**
Why go so far...
**[10:10] Gin**
Courtesan of Boobs?
***SIGN*** Courtesan of Boobs?
**[10:11] Tsu**
Who're you calling Courtesan of Boobs?!
**[10:15] (Flashback) Hin**
You're such a fool, really.
**[10:20] (Flashback) Hin**
You could've gone after him, you know?
**[10:24] (Flashback) Tsu**
Hinowa.
**[10:26] (Flashback) Tsu**
Once Yoshiwara sees the light of day,
it will gradually turn into a normal town.
**[10:32] (Flashback) Tsu**
That may be a joyous occasion,
**[10:36] (Flashback) Tsu**
but I'd be a little sad...
**[10:38] (Flashback) Tsu**
Living life watching the things
I know change and go away.
**[10:43] (Flashback) Tsu**
Leaving the people I was meant to see
the future with and walking on alone.
**[10:49] (Flashback) Tsu**
But that's exactly why I
have to see it all through.
**[10:53] (Flashback) Tsu**
See how those things end,
and what they give birth to.
**[10:58] Tsu**
And one day, when he does come back to us,
**[11:02] Tsu**
I want to tell him all about it.
**[11:05] Tsu**
That way, he can walk with us again.
**[11:11] Tsu**
So please tell me.
**[11:13] Tsu**
Where is he now? What
does he have his eyes on?
**[11:17] Tsu**
Is it the past, or is it the future?
**[11:24] Tae**
He started a lap by himself.
**[11:27] Sac**
Did she get through to him?
**[11:29] Sac**
Maybe he went to get himself
ready for spilling the beans.
**[11:33] Tsu**
Oh.
**[11:34] Tsu**
He's... back?
**[11:40] Tae**
What kind of enlightenment is this?!
**[11:42] Sac**
He just passed through
the gates of K*ntucky!
**[11:45] Kyu**
Do you want to be thrown in a pot and fried?!
**[11:48] Tae**
Wait... Where have I seen this C*lonel before?
**[11:52] Hij**
You moron!
**[11:54] Hij**
I told you to keep watch! Where'd he go?!
**[11:57] Kyu**
Huh?
**[11:57] Tae**
It's you!
**[11:59] Ymz**
I'm sorry, Hijikata-san.
**[12:01] Ymz**
I was pretending to be a statue
and keeping watch over there,
**[12:07] Ymz**
but he ran away.
**[12:11] Gin**
*That was close!*
**[12:12] Gin**
* I was about to attain enlightenment*
* and tell them everything!*
**[12:20] (Flashback) Tae**
But I would've wanted him to see it.
**[12:23] (Flashback) Tae**
You in a wedding dress...
**[12:27] (Flashback) Sac**
I will not let you have Sakata Gintoki.
**[12:30] (Flashback) Sac**
This is his home.
**[12:34] (Flashback) Tsu**
That way, he can walk with us again.
**[12:42] Gin**
*Damn it all...*
**[12:45] Gin**
*What the hell am I doing?*
**[12:50] W**
Odd Jobs.
**[12:52] W**
Thank you so very much.
**[12:56] W**
Goodbye, then.
**[13:11] Gin**
Shinpa...
**[13:26] Shin**
Hold it!
**[13:28] Shin**
I don't know what's going on, but ganging
up on someone isn't a good look.
**[13:34] Shin**
More than anything, I won't stand
for you sullying these streets
**[13:39] Shin**
with your violence.
**[13:41] Gin**
Cut!
**[13:44] Gin**
Okay, we're out of time. Wrap it up.
**[13:48] Gin**
Let's move on to the next segment!
**[13:50] Shin**
Wait...
**[13:51] Shin**
That was a really great
scene in the manga, too!
**[13:52] Gin**
Okay, so on that note...
**[13:53] Gin**
We know the show's still only halfway
through, but change of plans.
**[13:55] Shin**
Huh? The next segment?
**[13:57] Shin**
What do you mean, the next segment?
**[13:57] Gin**
After this, the Gintama anime
will air an emergency special.
**[13:59] Shin**
What the hell's going on?!
**[14:00] Gin**
But first, some ads.
**[14:09] Someone**
What? It was such a nice scene, too.
**[14:13] Gin**
Order!
**[14:14] Gin**
Order in the court!
**[14:16] Gin**
Court is now in session for the trial.
**[14:19] Shin**
Wait a second, Gin-san!
**[14:20] Shin**
What's all this? What are you trying to do?!
**[14:23] Gin**
Shinpachi-kun, stop making a fuss in the
courtroom. I'll cut your screen time.
**[14:27] Shin**
You just did earlier!
**[14:29] Kag**
At least you got some time!
**[14:32] Shin**
Kagura-chan?
**[14:33] Kag**
I didn't even get to show up!
What're you gonna do about this?!
**[14:36] Shin**
That's right!
**[14:38] Shin**
And what trial? What have we done wrong?!
**[14:41] Gin**
That's what we're trying to clear up here.
***SIGN*** Gintama Ending Scam Trial
**[14:45] Gin**
So let's begin the Gintama Ending Scam Trial.
**[14:49] Shin**
Gintama Ending Scam Trial?!
**[14:51] Gin**
Some of you watching at home may have
noticed from the program guide already.
**[14:58] Gin**
This is the Gintama anime's...
**[15:00] Gin**
last episode.
**[15:04] Ymz**
What? It's ending today?
**[15:06] Hij**
Seriously? That's so abrupt!
**[15:09] Gin**
Order!
**[15:10] Gin**
You're exactly right.
**[15:13] Gin**
If the viewers went, "What
are the anime staff doing?
**[15:17] Gin**
You're supposed to figure out the perfect
length. Are you messing with us?
**[15:20] Gin**
You need to read the manga,
calculate the right pacing,
**[15:22] Gin**
use appropriate cliffhangers to
stretch the plot across weeks,
**[15:25] Gin**
get the manuscripts from the
editor before *Jump*'s release day,
**[15:29] Gin**
and work on the series structure,"
**[15:31] Gin**
that harsh criticism would be well-deserved.
**[15:35] Shin**
Uh, the common viewer
wouldn't know that much.
**[15:37] Gin**
But while this may sound like an excuse,
**[15:41] Gin**
that's not it!
**[15:42] Gin**
It's not like that!
**[15:44] Shin**
Seriously, what's with you?
**[15:46] Shin**
Who are you speaking for?
**[15:47] Gin**
There's a very good reason the
anime's ending so abruptly today!
**[15:54] Gin**
To explain this, we must rewind
the clock to three years ago.
**[15:58] Shin**
That far back? This has been
three years in the making?!
**[16:03] Gin**
And here we have the third season of the
anime, which began airing April 2015.
**[16:09] Gin**
The series made its return around two
years after the Final Chapter movie.
**[16:13] Gin**
At this point, the manga side had
already told the anime staff this:
**[16:18] Gin**
"The manga will end soon."
**[16:23] Sac**
W-Wait a second.
**[16:25] Tsu**
Three whole years ago?
**[16:27] Kyu**
You mean...
**[16:28] Tae**
Season 3 started *because*
the manga was ending?
**[16:31] Gin**
Order in the court!
**[16:34] Gin**
That's right, actually.
**[16:36] Gin**
Season 3 was planned to be a year-long
series that would end around
**[16:40] Gin**
the same time as the manga.
**[16:43] Gin**
In order to make that possible,
**[16:45] Gin**
the anime staff reluctantly decided
to skip a few small comedy arcs.
**[16:50] Gin**
This was done to give Gintama the greatest
finale possible and make the viewers happy.
**[16:55] Gin**
It was a decision borne out of great passion!
**[16:58] Shin**
Seriously, who are you talking for?
**[16:59] Shin**
And why is it raining money?
Can we really believe you?!
**[17:03] Gin**
However!
**[17:04] Gin**
Instead of ending, the manga
made a shocking reveal
**[17:07] Gin**
and expanded the story with
several new developments.
**[17:09] Shin**
Why'd you make it look like Ir°sutoya?!
**[17:11] Gin**
And the anime ran out of time with
the Shinsengumi saying farewell.
**[17:16] Gin**
So on that note,
**[17:17] Gin**
the Shinsengumi are found
guilty for wasting episodes.
**[17:20] Gin**
Hijikata Toshiro is sentenced to death.
**[17:21] Hij**
Why?!
**[17:22] Hij**
The Shinsengumi are victims in this, too!
**[17:25] Hij**
And why am I the only one sentenced to death?
**[17:27] Hij**
Wait... Hey!
**[17:29] Gin**
After that, the anime producer ran around
trying to procure an additional time slot,
**[17:35] Gin**
but staying in the evening time
slot proved next to impossible,
**[17:38] Gin**
and the stress made him visit
cabaret clubs more often,
**[17:40] Gin**
leading to friction in his family.
**[17:43] Shin**
What did this have to do with cabaret clubs?
**[17:44] Gin**
Even in the midst of such chaos,
we somehow raised funds
**[17:48] Gin**
and cleverly moved to a late-night
time slot to make a comeback!
**[17:55] Gin**
And that was Season 4 here, which
began with the Battle on Rakuyo.
**[17:59] Gin**
We started working toward the
finale, this time for sure.
**[18:01] Gin**
However!
**[18:03] Gin**
Rather than tying the loose ends,
the story expanded to space
**[18:06] Gin**
and showed off the stupid
cue ball dad's love story.
**[18:11] Gin**
So on that note,
**[18:13] Gin**
the stupid cue ball is found guilty, too.
**[18:14] Gin**
Death to his hair roots.
**[18:15] UB**
N-No! Anything but my hair roots!
**[18:18] Kag**
Uh, your hair roots have
already been executed.
**[18:21] Gin**
At this point, the anime staff decided
to see what the manga was doing
**[18:24] Gin**
and build up a buffer of material by
switching strategies to buy time.
**[18:28] Gin**
We used the hype surrounding the
live-action movie announcement as cover,
***SIGN*** Yorinuke! Gintama-san
Flashback Collection
**[18:32] Gin**
bought time with some re-airs,
**[18:35] Gin**
and aired new material using the
short comedy arcs they'd skipped.
**[18:39] Gin**
They were all stopgap measures
we came up with on the fly,
**[18:42] Gin**
but we made it seem very natural,
like it'd been our plan all along.
**[18:48] Shin**
No, you didn't! Adapting comedy arcs
at that point felt really weird!
**[18:53] Gin**
And around then,
**[18:53] Sign**
Manga Editor
(at the time)
***SIGN*** Poison Mushroom Manabe
**[18:54] Gin**
the manga's editor at the time, Poison
Mushroom Manabe (Idol Otaku), told us this:
**[19:00] Manabe**
The manga will end this time for sure.
**[19:03] Gin**
The anime staff trusted his words,
**[19:05] Gin**
and despite the tiny budget and the
harsh schedule they had due to waiting,
**[19:10] Gin**
they believed the third time's the charm
and began adapting a new long arc.
**[19:14] Gin**
And that's how it started...
**[19:17] Gin**
The Silver Soul Arc, which was
supposed to be the final long arc.
**[19:21] Gin**
However! However!
**[19:24] Gin**
The story didn't end at all!
**[19:26] Gin**
While this season was one cours,
we got the time slot for 14 episodes,
**[19:30] Gin**
so some delay would still be okay,
**[19:32] Gin**
or so we thought, but the story went
way past that and still didn't end!
**[19:35] Gin**
"We even made the perfect opening
and ending for a finale.
**[19:39] Gin**
What do we do now?
**[19:40] Gin**
Is this really gonna end? Can it end?"
**[19:43] Gin**
That's how we felt, and we
expressed those feelings frankly.
**[19:46] [SONG] Sign**
Pretended to go out for work
but instead went to see a play
where Nagasawa Masami wore
a racy costume.
***SIGN*** Manabe
**[19:46] Gin**
And then, Editor D*ck said...
**[19:51] Manabe**
Uh, it doesn't look like
it's ending soon at all.
**[19:53] Gin**
Huh?
**[19:54] Manabe**
Also, the manga's weekly
serialization is going to stop soon.
**[19:57] Gin**
Huh?
**[19:58] Manabe**
Also, I won't be editing it anymore.
**[20:01] Gin**
What?!
**[20:03] Gin**
Instead of walking in step, one leg is
disappearing just before the finish line?!
**[20:08] Gin**
So on that note, Hasegawa
Taizo is sentenced to death!
**[20:10] Mad**
What? Me?! Where did that come from?!
**[20:13] Gin**
For suddenly acting like Chief
of Immigration while unemployed,
**[20:16] Gin**
your gaudy outfit,
**[20:18] Gin**
and pissing me off by cockily showing up in
the live-action TV show and stage events.
**[20:22] Kag**
That even got on my nerves.
**[20:24] Shin**
No objections.
**[20:25] Mad**
Why am I the only one getting this treatment?!
**[20:29] Shin**
But Gin-san...
**[20:30] Shin**
If what you said so far is true,
**[20:32] Shin**
the one who really deserves punishment...
**[20:34] Kag**
...is him. It's gotta be him.
**[20:37] Gin**
You did well to notice, Shinpachi, Kagura.
**[20:40] Gin**
That's right. The real accused in
this Gintama Ending Scam Trial...
**[20:47] Gin**
is this man, the gorilla mangaka!
**[20:50] Sor**
I wanna be a steamed cheese bun.
**[20:53] Sor**
Defendant... Well, we more or less know
you're getting sentenced to death,
**[20:57] Sor**
but is there anything you'd like to say?
**[20:59] Sor**
Now is your chance to apologize,
you know. Defendant?
**[21:04] Shin**
Ew! He pulled something out!
**[21:06] Gin**
Oh, it's another of those things.
**[21:08] Gin**
Kagura, you can forget your
role again and read it out.
**[21:17] Kugyuu**
"To all the anime viewers,
and the anime staff.
**[21:23] Kugyuu**
Due to my dirty tackle, I have caused
you tons of trouble, and I'm so...
**[21:30] Kugyuu**
Huh? It's not tackle?
**[21:32] Kugyuu**
It's the other thing?
**[21:34] Kugyuu**
The *******, then?
**[21:36] Kugyuu**
Huh? That was actually a huge disaster?
**[21:38] Kugyuu**
I shouldn't bring it up again?
**[21:40] Kugyuu**
Oh, I know.
**[21:41] Kugyuu**
The last letter, when I revealed that
Fujita, the previous director, had divorced.
**[21:45] Kugyuu**
He's actually mad about
that? Is that really so bad?
**[21:49] Kugyuu**
I mean, after his divorce, he's now cozying
up with an instructor 10 years younger.
**[21:54] Kugyuu**
What is he being instructed on?
**[21:57] Kugyuu**
That's what *I'd* like to be instructed on.
**[21:59] Kugyuu**
Huh? That's not it, either?
**[22:01] Kugyuu**
What is it, then?
**[22:02] Kugyuu**
I've been too sleepy to watch the anime
since it moved to late nights, so I dunno.
**[22:07] Kugyuu**
What part has it reached now?
**[22:09] Kugyuu**
The part where Saito Hajime kills Usui of
the Ten Swords with the Zero Style Gatotsu?
**[22:14] Kugyuu**
That's my personal best bout,
**[22:16] Kugyuu**
so I'd be perfectly happy
if the anime ended there.
**[22:19] Kugyuu**
I'm just so filled with
satisfaction right now.
**[22:22] Kugyuu**
I'm not thinking of my next work yet,
**[22:25] Kugyuu**
but let's see...
**[22:27] Kugyuu**
What if the Black Ships of the Bakumatsu
were actually alien vessels,
**[22:30] Kugyuu**
and the people in that world still grittily
lived with smiles on their faces?
**[22:35] Kugyuu**
That's the kind of story I'd like
to write, or well, explore in full.
**[22:39] Kugyuu**
If we have the chance, let's
meet again in that next work.
**[22:45] Kugyuu**
I've already come up with the title.
**[22:47] Kugyuu**
It's a title that'd sound really vulgar
when spelled slightly differently...
***SIGN*** Gintama Final: End of Sky
**[22:51] Kugyuu**
Gintama Final: End of Sky."
**[22:56] Gin**
I shall hereby hand down the verdict.
**[22:57] Gin**
The gorilla mangaka is...
**[23:01] Gin**
Not guilty!
**[23:04] Kag**
What part of that letter
merited pardoning him?!
**[23:07] Shin**
This gorilla never actually
apologized for anything!
**[23:10] Gin**
Okay, pipe down.
**[23:12] Gin**
What can ya do? If it's not
ending, it's not ending.
**[23:16] Gin**
So yeah, while it was a
really sloppy last episode,
**[23:21] Gin**
the Gintama Ending Scam Trial
is over! Court is adjourned!
***SIGN*** Next Work Preview
***SIGN*** Gintama Final
***SIGN*** End of Sky
***SIGN*** In the Works!
**[23:59] Shin**
Yeah, like hell! That's never happening!
***SIGN*** Thank you very much
***SIGN*** for being a part of this journey.
***SIGN*** If the manga's continuing in GIGA, what about the anime...?
**[24:10] Sor**
Writing manga is such a pain in the ass!