1 - Level 01: Reborn in a Game World!?

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:10] Yellow
    Hero of fate, I need your 
    help to rescue the princess.
[00:17] Red
    You're asking me to help you?
[00:18] Red
    Nice, nice!
[00:20] Red
    Princess, no, my future wife,
    I shall come to save you!
[00:27] Red
    Boop.
[00:32] Red
    My name is Light.
[00:34] Red
    I'm a game-loving middle
    schooler like any other.
[00:37] Red
    I got lonely playing by myself,
    so I invited some other gamers, but...
[00:42] Red
    His name is Yomi.
[00:44] Red
    He's, like, two or three
    years younger than me.
[00:51] Red
    I'm Light,
[00:55] Red
    and this is Yomi.
[01:00] Red
    And so our adventure begins.
SIGN    Level 01: Reborn in a Game World!?
[01:52] Red
    That toilet back there didn't have a seat.
[01:54] Red
    Insane.
[01:55] Blue
    Huh? What are you talking about?
[01:56] Yellow
    All right, stop right there.
[01:58] Yellow
    Let's stop walking.
[01:59] Blue
    What do you mean, stop walking?
[02:01] Red
    The princess is waiting for us to rescue her.
[02:03] Red
    What is the problem, Alpha?
[02:05] Red
    Is it a monster?
[02:05] Yellow
    I can't take it anymore.
[02:07] Yellow
    This kid's been talking like
    this ever since he was reborn.
[02:12] Yellow
    I can't stand how annoying he is, can you?
[02:15] Blue
    If you had to ask.
[02:16] Yellow
    See?
[02:17] Yellow
    This son thinks so, too.
[02:19] Yellow
    So...
[02:20] Blue
    Don't call me "son."
[02:22] Yellow
    What, now that we were reborn
    into this fantasy world,
[02:24] Yellow
    you want to talk old-timey, too?
[02:27] Yellow
    Give it a break.
[02:28] Red
    Now is not the time to quarrel!
[02:31] Red
    We must hurry!
[02:32] Yellow
    He's still at it.
[02:33] Yellow
    He hasn't stopped.
[02:35] Yellow
    It's ongoing.
[02:36] Yellow
    Right, son?
[02:38] Blue
    Stop that.
[02:39] Yellow
    So, Light-kun, what were
    you like in the real world?
[02:43] Yellow
    You get home and go straight to gaming?
[02:45] Yellow
    "I hate going outside and being
    actives! It's too tiring."
[02:48] Yellow
    That kind of a kid?
[02:51] Yellow
    Right?
[02:52] Red
    What's your problem?!
[02:54] Red
    Here I am reborn in a new world,
    and you're rooning the mood!
[02:58] Yellow
    Oh, just so you know, 
    it's ruining, not rooning.
[03:02] Yellow
    I guess you still are a
    middle school kid, huh?
[03:05] Yellow
    A junior high school student.
[03:08] Red
    Then let me ask: Why is my companion
    in a fantasy world an AI robot?
[03:13] Yellow
    Badass, huh?
[03:13] Red
    No!
[03:14] Red
    And you're totally humanoid, to boot!
[03:16] Red
    Why are you bringing science
    fiction to fantasy?
[03:19] Red
    You're ruining it!
[03:19] Yellow
    What do you want me to do?
[03:21] Yellow
    Go complain to the developers.
[03:25] Red
    You can do that?
[03:26] Yellow
    Of course.
[03:27] Blue
    How?
[03:27] Yellow
    Once you rescue the princess,
    you can go back to the real world.
[03:30] Yellow
    Then you can enter your question into
    the Contact Support form on the website.
SIGN    Contact Support
SIGN    What the hell!?
SIGN    It's a fantasy setting, and the companion's an AI robot... And he's totally a humanoid! Couldn't he at least be a bit more steampunk?!
[03:30] [SONG] Text
    Frequently Asked Questions
SIGN    Q. How many snacks do I get? Q. What if I'm not enjoying the game? Q. My companion's an AI robot? Q. How many hours can I play for at a time? Q. Are there any cheats?
[03:33] Yellow
    Oh, but read the FAQ first.
[03:36] Red
    So I still have to rescue the princess!
[03:38] Yellow
    You're a hero, after all.
[03:40] Red
    Whatever.
[03:41] Red
    We're hunting the next monster.
[03:43] Yellow
    Can we please do it without the fantasy act?
[03:46] Yellow
    All right, let's go.
[03:48] Blue
    What a pain.
SIGN    Today's Princess
[03:58] Pink
    Help me!
[03:59] Pink
    Or so I was about to say,
    but this might not be all that bad.
[04:04] Pink
    I mean, I don't have to
    go to school now, right?
[04:05] Pink
    That's not bad.
[04:06] Pink
    It's freedom.
[04:07] Pink
    I'm captured, and yet I'm free!
[04:11] Pink
    And knowing Dad, he's going to ask one
    of the 500 AI robots in the mansion
[04:15] Pink
    to send a dazzling hero.
[04:18] Pink
    He must be on the way right now.
[04:19] Pink
    Man, my imagination's going wild!
[04:21] Pink
    The hero's gotta be hot.
[04:24] Pink
    Oh, man! I can spend all
    day on this one fantasy!
SIGN    Today's Level Up
[04:33] Yellow
    All right, listen up.
[04:35] Yellow
    We're going to level up now.
[04:37] Red
    Level up?
[04:39] Yellow
    Yeah.
[04:39] Yellow
    It's way too early for you
    two to save the princess.
[04:43] Yellow
    We need you to finish some
    quests and get a bit stronger.
[04:46] Yellow
    Not that I know what kind
    of missions we'll have.
[04:49] Yellow
    Whatever, let's give it a shot.
[04:51] Yellow
    Load data.
[04:57] Red
    You never told me your hand could do that!
[05:00] Yellow
    Looks like it's going to be a monster quest.
[05:02] Yellow
    Just kill the waves of monsters
    as they come, and you'll be good.
[05:05] Red
    This gets me in the mood!
SIGN    A Slime has appeared!
[05:10] Red
    All right, I'm the hero, so I'm up first.
[05:12] Red
    Fantasy Strike!
SIGN    You have defeated the Slime!
[05:16] Red
    That's way too gross.
SIGN    A Sir Slime has appeared!
[05:19] Blue
    Go!
[05:22] Red
    He got away!
[05:23] Blue
    No...
[05:24] Blue
    He's going on a journey.
SIGN    Sir Slime has escaped!
SIGN    An SOSlime has appeared!
[05:28] Red
    Fantasy Strike!
[05:30] Red
    Fantasy Strike!
[05:34] Yellow
    Yo, fantasy boy, cool down.
SIGN    SOSlime used Howl!
[05:37] ---
    Help me!
[05:38] Blue
    Hold up...
SIGN    A Tho*as the Tank Slime has appeared!
[05:40] Blue
    It can't be...
[05:42] Blue
    Look out!
[05:44] Red
    I wouldn't be a hero if I ran away now!
[05:46] Red
    Bring it!
[05:47] Yellow
    This guy's a legit dumbass!
SIGN    Today's Crystal
[05:56] ---
    gd Men!
[06:01] Red
    Hey, Yomi's wand...
[06:03] Yellow
    Oh, this?
[06:04] Yellow
    It shows you a view of another world.
[06:07] Yellow
    Why don't we try talking over it?
[06:11] Blue
    That sounds fun.
[06:16] Yellow
    What is this?
[06:18] A
    What am I supposed to do?
[06:19] Yellow
    What's the gorilla for?
[06:21] A
    It just went right through the gorilla.
[06:23] Yellow
    He's dead.
[06:24] Blue
    We're supposed to speak into this?
[06:26] Yellow
    Who's going first?
[06:27] Yellow
    We got the really passionate...
[06:31] Blue
    Yeah, going forward.
[06:33] Yellow
    Light, you take this.
[06:35] Red
    Me? All right, let's go.
[06:38] Red
    Shit! Shit!
[06:40] Red
    My wife!
[06:41] Red
    She threw out all my figures!
[06:45] Red
    All of them!
[06:50] Blue
    What's with the shout?
[06:53] Red
    I couldn't get in.
[06:54] Yellow
    So...
[06:55] Yellow
    So what figures did she throw out?
[06:57] Red
    Oh, are you sure...
[06:59] Red
    Are you sure you want me to tell you here?
[07:01] Yellow
    Sure, say it.
[07:03] Red
    Should I?
[07:04] Red
    That would be NSFW!
[07:09] Red
    One of those ones you
    can't look at from below!
[07:11] Yellow
    One of those.
[07:12] Blue
    Oh, to be young...
[07:12] Red
    You have something, don't you?
[07:14] Yellow
    Okay, okay.
[07:15] Yellow
    I got the idea.
[07:17] Blue
    The idea?
[07:17] Yellow
    All right, I'm up next.
[07:20] Yellow
    Here I go.
[07:24] Yellow
    You gotta work on your aim!
[07:25] Yellow
    You're not going to hit me
    with that pathetic kamehameha!
[07:30] Yellow
    It's no use defeating me.
[07:32] Yellow
    There are a few of us!
[07:36] Blue
    A few of us?
[07:36] Yellow
    Few of us!
SIGN    Preview
[08:14] Red
    I bet you can't imagine how much I've
    been looking forward to our duel today.
[08:20] Red
    I'm going to derp with all my might.
[08:22] Yellow
    Bring it on.
[08:24] Red
    Next time, on gd Men of Tennis:
SIGN    Light VS Alpha
[08:26] Red
    "Light VS Alpha."
[08:28] Yellow
    Of course not!