6 - Satania's Counterattack Source: Crunchyroll Translator: Editor: Timer: QC: (Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.) [00:01] Satania     Gabriel got me good again! [00:06] Satania     How the devil didn't it work?! [00:08] Satania     My plan was totally foolproof! [00:21] Satania narr     Oh, the genius of my infernal plan. [00:23] Satania narr     Gabriel will don those     massage slippers, and... [00:29] Satania narr     There can only be one outcome! [00:42] (Flashback) Satania     Huh?! [00:46] (Flashback) Satania     Hold it! [00:49] (Flashback) Satania     Why are you wearing those like it's normal? [00:51] (Flashback) Satania     It's so obviously not! SIGN    Rumble [00:52] (Flashback) Gab     So it was you. [00:56] Satania     And then she got mad at me! [00:58] Satania     How in Hell do I beat her?! [01:01] TV     Good evening, all you demons out there! [01:04] [SONG] Text     Hell Shopping Network [01:04] TV     Welcome to the Hell Shopping Network. [01:06] TV     Today we've got some special items [01:09] TV     sure to make any angel cry uncle! [01:13] Satania     Speak of the devil! [01:14] TV     First up today, we've got... [01:17] TV     a .44 caliber magnum revolver, [01:20] TV     the Devil Python! [01:22] Satania     S-So cool... SIGN    Episode 6 Satania's Counterattack [03:00] Vigne     Don't you think it's a little early     to play with weapons? [03:04] Satania     Are you in shock and awe? [03:06] Satania     I bought this dirty baby     from the Hell Shopping Network. [03:09] Satania     It's a .44 caliber magnum revolver. [03:12] Satania     The Devil Python! [03:15] Vigne     Raphi, shouldn't you be next door?     Homeroom's about to start. [03:19] Raphi     Wherever Satania-san is,     so too shall I appear. [03:23] Vigne     Don't. [03:25] Raphi     By the way, what is the     Hell Shopping Network? [03:27] Vigne     It's a Hell TV program that sells     too-good-to-be-true junk. [03:30] Satania     This magnum revolver was developed     by Hell's very own Devil Corp. [03:35] Satania     With first-class ergonomic     and aerodynamic design. [03:37] Gab     Reading straight from the manual? [03:39] Satania     Well? [03:40] Vigne     Well, what? [03:42] Satania     Well, isn't it totally hella cool? Duh! [03:45] Vigne     What a pain. [03:46] Raphi     Satania-san, that isn't loaded, is it? [03:50] Satania     You bet it is.     And with special ammunition. [03:53] Raphi     Special? [03:55] Satania     Get a load of terror from this. [03:57] Satania     Anyone shot by this baby... [04:00] Satania     will be unable to stop laughing     for ten minutes straight! [04:07] Raphi     Satania-san... [04:10] Raphi     You look so cool. [04:14] Vigne narr     Sh-She lied! [04:15] Raphi     You've descended to the throne     of Hell's King of Hard-Boiled. [04:19] Raphi     That may really be God's honest truth. [04:21] Satania     Yes, sing my praises! [04:23] Vigne narr     She fell for it?! [04:29] Satania     Now, say your prayers, Gabriel! [04:32] Satania     It just goes to show     that you reap what you sow! [04:36] Satania     Well, knowing you, [04:37] Satania     you won't surrender     until you're shot to Hell. [04:40] Gab     You win. [04:41] Satania     Huh?! [04:42] Gab     I surrender. [04:43] Gab     What the heck can I do against a gun? [04:46] Gab     You win this time, Satania. [04:48] Satania     Huh? [04:50] Satania     Sorry, come again? [04:52] Gab     I said, I surrender. You win. [05:00] Satania narr     Gabriel finally admitted defeat to me! [05:03] Satania narr     No, stop. I'm hard-boiled.     That means no victory dance. [05:06] Satania narr     Poker face. Poker face. [05:09] Satania     T-Too bad it's too late     to change the highway you're on! [05:13] Gab     What's with your face? [05:15] Satania     You may admit your defeat, [05:16] Satania     but you still have hell to pay     for all you've done to me. [05:19] Gab     I'm prepared for the worst. [05:22] Satania     Putting on a strong face? [05:24] Satania     Well, apparently, it's painless.     Count yourself lucky. [05:27] Satania     Act your contrition     through your explosive laughter! [05:33] Gab     Time out. [05:35] Satania     Wh-What? [05:36] Gab     You said it's "apparently" painless. [05:39] Gab     You haven't tested it yet? [05:41] Satania     Well, no... [05:43] Gab     Lemme see it a sec. [05:44] Gab     It'd be totally lame if it doesn't work. [05:46] Satania     Yeah, but— [05:47] Gab     C'mon, clock's ticking. [05:48] Satania     O-Okay... [05:55] Vigne     No mercy! [05:59] Vigne     Now, what did I tell you? [06:01] Vigne     Are you okay? [06:13] Satania     Wait— Gabriel— [06:17] Gab     Lucky you, Satania.     Looks like it really does work. [06:21] Satania     Curse you... [06:59] Satania     Gabriel! [07:01] Satania     This isn't the time for video games! [07:03] Sataia     Fight me! [07:05] Satania     If you don't stop me now,     the world will be [07:08] Satania     steeped long into chaos     by my devilish actions. [07:17] Satania     Perhaps I'll begin by turning     off your game console! [07:20] Gab     Try me. I'll turn your body into blood. [07:23] Gab     You always want to fight. [07:25] Gab     Why do I have to fight you? [07:27] Satania     To make it clear who's the superior demon! [07:30] Gab     Yeah, uh, I'm not a demon. [07:32] Satania     Just fight me!     We'll settle this once and for all! [07:36] Gab     Too much work. Get lost. [07:38] Satania     No way! I'm not leaving until you fight me! [07:40] Gab     Shut up. [07:42] Raphi     It appears that I'm needed! [07:47] Satania     How'd you just appear there?! [07:49] Raphi     Wherever Satania-san is,     so too shall I appear. [07:53] Satania     Don't. [07:54] Gab     Why do you freaks have to     appear at my place? [07:57] Raphi     You've challenged Gab-chan     to a contest, yes? [08:00] Satania     Well, yeah... [08:01] Raphi     I would like to oversee     your match as referee. [08:06] Satania     Hell no! You're just gonna get in the way! [08:08] Raphi     Oh, no, Satania-san.     You're quite mistaken. [08:11] Satania     Huh? [08:12] Raphi     When you triumph in glory and splendor, [08:15] Raphi     who will tell tales     of your valiant exploits? [08:18] Raphi     I shall bear witness [08:20] Raphi     and sing of your honor     and majesty for posterity. [08:23] Raphi     That is why I am here. [08:29] Satania     I see. You know a legend when you see one. [08:33] Satania     I grant you permission to stay! [08:34] Raphi     Thank you, sir! [08:36] Gab     You can't give permission.     This is my apartment. [08:39] Satania     Now, what should the contest be? [08:42] Raphi     Good question. [08:43] Raphi     How about shogi? [08:45] Satania     Sh-Shogi? [08:47] Raphi     It's an intellectual game, [08:49] Raphi     which makes it a perfect fit for you. [08:52] Raphi     What do you think? [08:53] Satania     Intellectual... [08:55] Satania     An excellent idea!     I am, after all, an intellectual. [08:58] Gab     Hey, like, do you even know the rules? [09:01] Gab     I can play, but you? SIGN    Shogi for Dummies [09:03] Satania     That goes without saying! SIGN    Shogi for Dummies [09:06] Gab     Hey! [09:09] Satania narr     I now grasp the rules     in the palms of my hands. [09:11] Satania     The goal of the game is to     take your opponent's king. SIGN    Pawn Silver General Bishop SIGN    King Rook SIGN    Knight Lance [09:15] Satania narr     There are a lot of characters     I can't read, but whatever. [09:21] Gab     I'll let you have the first move.     Let's get started. [09:24] Gab narr     So I can end this quick. [09:26] Satania     You won't look so composed for long. [09:29] Satania     Don't start crying in fear of my power. [09:33] Satania     Here I go! SIGN    King [09:38] Gab     Are you sure you know the rules? [09:41] Satania     A king commands neither men     nor respect from the rear. [09:45] Satania     Only if he takes the lead himself     will the soldiers follow. [09:48] Satania     Well? How will you counter this     inventive and devilish move, Gabriel? [09:55] Girls     Huh? [09:56] Raphi     Satania-san. [09:58] Raphi     Offside! [09:59] Satania     Huh?! [10:00] Satania narr     "Offside"? What does "offside" mean? [10:03] Satania narr     What was wrong with my move?! [10:07] Raphi     First two points to Gab-chan! [10:09] Satania narr     Why did Gabriel get points?! [10:13] Satania narr     I've fallen behind. I didn't know     there were points in this game. [10:17] Satania narr     Shogi... It appears that     it's harder than it looks. [10:21] Satania narr     But I won't let a mere penalty shake me. [10:25] Satania narr     On the contrary, I will stand firm and... SIGN    Pawn [10:27] Satania narr     Attack! [10:28] Satania narr     Attack! [10:29] Satania narr     Attack! [10:34] Satania narr     Who said the battlefield was     limited to the game board? SIGN    Pawn SIGN    Pawn SIGN    Pawn [10:38] Satania narr     I've positioned my soldiers both     inside and outside the castle SIGN    Pawn SIGN    Knight SIGN    Lance SIGN    Pawn SIGN    Pawn SIGN    Pawn SIGN    Pawn SIGN    Knight SIGN    Lance [10:41] Satania narr     to attack Gabriel's king     from all directions! [10:46] Satania     This is a true demonic formation! [10:48] Satania     Now, come at us from wherever you wi— [10:52] Raphi     Double dribble. Two points to Gab-chan. [10:55] Satania     Again?! I don't get these rules at all! [11:01] Raphi     It's your turn, Gab-chan. [11:03] Gab     'Kay. Then, I'll use my four points... [11:07] Satania     Huh? [11:08] Gab     ...to bribe Satania's pawns. [11:10] Satania     You can use points like that?! [11:12] Satania     Aren't bribes against the law or something?! [11:14] Raphi     There is nothing against it in the rules. [11:17] Satania     You'd better not be making     them up as you go. [11:19] Gab     Next, I'll evolve the soldiers I bought. [11:22] [SONG] Text     Promoted     Pawn [11:22] Satania     Evolve them?! [11:24] Gab     And activate my ultimate move. [11:25] Satania     Ultimate move? [11:27] Gab     By sacrificing four pawns... [11:32] Gab     My king evolves into God. [11:34] Satania     God?! SIGN    King SIGN    God [11:39] Satania     Hey! You wrote that on the piece! [11:42] Satania     This has to be against the rules! [11:44] Raphi     Safe! [11:45] Satania     It's good?! [11:47] Gab     Take this! The Hammer of God! SIGN    King [11:54] Raphi     The winner is Gab-chan! [11:57] Gab     Weak. [11:59] Satania     There's no way I can accept this! [12:01] Gab     Hey, you didn't know the rules     but wanted to play anyway. [12:08] Satania     Fine. [12:11] Satania     I'll memorize the rules by tomorrow! [12:13] Satania     And then I'll challenge you again! SIGN    The Next Day [12:22] Gab     You wasted your time. [12:26] Raphi     The penalty for the loser, Satania-san,     is a bath in boiling water. [12:29] Satania     What kind of rules are these?! [12:38] Prez narr     I'm Class 1-B's president. [12:41] Prez narr     My specialty is mental math. [12:43] Prez narr     There is, of course, a reason     I'm striking this pose. [12:48] Prez narr     It's because we're doing     figure drawings in art class. [12:51] Prez narr     But... [12:53] Prez narr     Normally, models would pose like that— [12:56] Prez narr     just sitting. [12:58] Prez narr     Why am I striking a pose, you ask? [13:02] Prez narr     Because my partner is Kurumizawa-san! [13:06] Prez narr     According to her, this pose is     "hella awesome" or something. [13:10] Prez narr     But to me, it's my public execution! [13:13] Satania     Prez! [13:14] Prez     Uh, wh-what? [13:16] Satania     Freeze! [13:17] Prez     R-Right! [13:19] Prez narr     I thought Tenma-san and Tsukinose-san     were the class eccentrics this year, but... [13:26] (Flashback) Satania     I am the Archdemon Satanichia, SIGN    Dream [13:29] (Flashback) Satania     Queen of all Hell! SIGN    Dream [13:31] (Flashback) Satania     Naturally, I don't do homework! SIGN    Reality [13:34] (Flashback) Satania     And I have no intention     of apologizing for it! [13:36] (Flashback) Satania     How do you like that? A demonic deed     of the highest order, isn't it? [13:40] (Flashback) Satania     Prepare to meet your maker, fish! [13:47] Prez narr     But Kurumizawa-san     is on another level entirely. SIGN    Apocalypse [13:49] [SONG] Text     Armageddon [13:51] Satania     Okay, Prez. [13:52] Satania     Clothes off. [13:56] Satania     This picture isn't hella awesome enough. [13:59] Satania     It's too ordinary. [14:01] Prez     Um, posing in the nude is a little— [14:04] Satania     Prez. [14:06] Satania     My pride as an artist is at stake. [14:08] Satania     I refuse to make compromises     in pursuing my art. [14:12] Prez narr     Since when were you an artist? [14:14] Prez narr     But now I see that     she's really taking this seriously. [14:18] Prez narr     I should cooperate     as best as I can. [14:21] Satania     Not the top. The bottom! [14:23] Prez     What?! [14:24] Prez     I can't take my bottoms off! [14:25] Prez     I mean, I can't take my top off, either! [14:28] Prez     I can strike a pose     that I think is cool, but... [14:30] Satania     Freeze! [14:31] Prez     Sorry! [14:33] Vigne     Will the president be okay? [14:35] Gab     Sucks for her, getting stuck with Satania. [14:38] Vigne     I hope she won't be too much trouble. [14:40] Gab     Yeah, wishful thinking. [14:42] Vigne     How's yours coming along? [14:44] Gab     Almost done. It's coming out pretty well. [14:47] Vigne     Really? Let me see. [14:50] Vigne     Why did you zoom in on that? [14:53] Satania     I'm bored now. [14:54] Prez     Huh?! [14:55] Prez     What happened to all that passion you had?! [14:58] Satania     Your pose just isn't speaking to me. [15:02] Prez     It's my fault?! [15:03] Prez narr     Oh, no. [15:05] Prez narr     I'll feel bad if she can't finish     her drawing because of me. [15:08] Preznarr     There must be something     I can do to reinspire her. [15:11] Prez     Kurumizawa-san! [15:13] Satania     Huh? [15:14] Prez     What if, um... [15:16] Prez     I know, what if we used some props? [15:18] Satania     Props? [15:20] Prez     There should be plenty of them     in the supply room. [15:23] Prez     Why not add one to your drawing? [15:25] Satania     I see! [15:28] Satania     I choose him! [15:30] Satania     I could turn him into a great work of art. [15:33] Prez     He's more of a subject than a prop... [15:35] Satania     He's not wearing clothes, either.     He's perfect. [15:38] Prez narration     What's with the obsession with nudes? [15:41] Prez     Um, but the assignment is     to draw a classmate. [15:44] Satania     I know. [15:46] Satania     I'll put your face on him! [15:48] Prez narration     Creepy! [15:49] Prez     I don't know about that. [15:52] Satania     So you want it on this? [15:53] Prez     I don't want it on anything! [15:56] Satania     Oh, come on. [15:58] Prez narr     Kurumizawa-san's inspiration is fading! [16:00] Prez narr     There has to be something else... [16:02] Prez narr     Eureka! [16:04] Prez     D-Double-sword style! [16:08] Satania     Uh, sure. Let's go with that. [16:11] Prez     Kill me now. [16:13] Vigne     Sorry, Prez, Satania's a little... [16:16] Prez     Okay! I'll take them off!     I'll take them off for you! [16:20] Vigne     Huh?! [16:21] Vigne     Wait, Prez! Keep your shirt on! [16:24] Prez     Let me go, Tsukinose-san! [16:26] Prez     It's my responsibility as class president! [16:30] Satania     That pose! Freeze! [16:39] Prez narr     The responsibility was     too much for me to bear. SIGN    First Place SIGN    Tsukinose [16:49] Gab     What? [16:50] Girls     Trick or treat! [17:01] Girls     Trick or treat, smell my feet,     give me something good to eat! SIGN    Setsubun SIGN    Lucky Beans SIGN    Demons out! [17:16] Satania     Right! So today is Halloween! [17:19] Satania     That awesome day when you get all the candy     and pull all the pranks you want! [17:25] Gab     I don't care if it's Armageddon.     Do you have to do it here? [17:29] Gab     And did you have to toss     all my stuff outside? [17:31] Gab     I've got MMOs to play. [17:35] Satania     You forfeit the right to refuse us     when you gave us only beans! [17:38] Gab     Dang, Halloween's harsh. [17:40] Gab     And what's with the weird get-ups? [17:42] Vigne     They're not weird! I made these     especially for today! [17:46] Gab     Man, do you have to get so excited     over every little event? [17:49] Vigne     Since we're in the human world,     we should enjoy it to the fullest! [17:53] Satania     Exactly! [17:54] Gab     Shut up. [17:56] Satania     Forcing your way into people's homes,     taking all the candy you desire, [18:00] Satania     venting your anger through pranks     if they don't give you any... [18:04] Gab     Nothing could be more fun than this! [18:06] Gab     You sound like a total maniac. [18:09] Satania     There's still treats to be plundered here!     I can feel it! [18:12] Gab     Say what? [18:13] Satania     We'll split up and search. Raphiel! [18:14] Raphi     On it! [18:18] Gab     Hey! [18:20] Gab     Sheesh, does Halloween mean free     search warrants or something? [18:24] Vigne     Oh, right. I forgot. [18:26] Vigne     I made a costume for you, too, Gab. [18:29] Gab     Nope. Not wearing it. [18:30] Vigne     Aw, why not? I already made it... [18:34] Gab     No point, and it's stupid. [18:36] Gab     Besides, isn't Halloween about     driving away demons and evil spirits? [18:43] Gab     And you demons are enjoying it? [18:45] Vigne     Well, Halloween has basically     no religious significance anymore, [18:49] Vigne     and we demons need to adapt     to the times, too... [18:52] Vigne     Therefore, it is our conclusion that     there is no need to eschew the occasion. [18:58] Gab     What is this, a press conference? [19:01] Gab     Oh, right. That reminds me,     I already have a costume. [19:04] Vigne     Huh? [19:05] Vigne narr     I didn't expect her to care, [19:07] Vigne narr     but I guess Gab was excited     for Halloween, too— [19:14] Gab     My angel costume. [19:15] Vigne     That's what you are! [19:17] Vigne     Or, well, you know,     you're just barely an angel now. [19:20] Vigne     Just be careful, okay? [19:21] Gab     Barely an angel... [19:23] Vigne     And since you're trying things     on anyway, try this on, too. [19:27] Gab     Changing's effort. No thanks. [19:29] Vigne     Oh, come on!     You'll be positively adorable! Please? [19:32] Gab     Nope. [19:33] Vigne     Don't be like that— [19:34] Gab     Nope. [19:35] Vigne     Just a little— [19:36] Gab     Nope. Not gonna. I'm good. [19:41] Vigne     Raphi, do you have a moment? [19:44] Vigne     I'd like to dress Gab up in something cute.     Be a doll and give me a hand? [19:48] Raphi     My, oh, my! [19:56] Gab     What the hell is this?! [19:58] Vigne     A werecat costume. [20:00] Gab     Not buying it. [20:02] Vigne     I knew I was onto something. [20:05] Gab     One of us isn't like the others,     and it's me. [20:07] Gab     Not that something else'd be better. [20:09] Raphi     What shall we do now? [20:11] Vigne     Hmm. Go to someone's house? SIGN    Potato Chips [20:16] Satania     I've got a place in mind! [20:20] Gab     What do you think you're eating?! [20:22] Gab     Those are my precious provisions! [20:25] Vigne     We can't bother any strangers, okay? [20:27] Satania     No prob! It's someone we all know's house! [20:31] Vigne     Someone we all know? [20:39] Vigne     This? [20:40] Satania     Indeed. [20:41] Gab     Who lives here? [20:43] Satania     You'll see soon enough. [20:52] Satania     Sensei! Trick or treat! [20:55] Gab     It's our teacher's house?! [20:56] Vigne     Sensei, I can explain! [20:59] Vigne     This is, um, all a mix-up! [21:00] Satania     Vignette, calm yourself.     This is permissible on Halloween. SIGN    Devil's Mission [21:06] Satania narr     Now this is a devil's mission. [21:08] Satania narr     You visit someone who won't have treats [21:10] Satania narr     so you're justified     in playing a trick on them! [21:14] Satania narr     I get to get payback on the teacher     without fear of repercussions! [21:17] Satania narr     I am such a genius. [21:19] Satania     Well, Sensei? Where are our treats? [21:21] Satania     No treats, no complaints     if we play tricks on you! [21:33] Raphi     Oh, my. [21:33] Satania     Get back here, coward! No treats     means you wanna get tricked— [21:39] Gab     He has treats?! [21:40] Vigne     Complete with goodie bag?! [21:42] Satania     Th-This is not enough to satisfy me! [21:44] Vigne     Why not? [21:45] Satania     Offer me something more to my— SIGN    Ultimate Melon Bread [21:51] Satania     Limited-edition deluxe melon bread! [21:54] Gab     Nice, Sensei. [21:56] Satania     Th-Thank y— [22:02] Satania     Hey! [22:03] Satania     How'd I become the victim of a dog's trick?! [22:07] Satania     Trick or dog!