# E3 - Baby Talk Spell
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G6M84K1W6/baby-talk-spell)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
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***SIGN*** Episode 3 "Baby Talk Spell"
***SIGN*** Episode 3 "Baby Talk Spell"
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***SIGN*** Episode 3 "Baby Talk Spell"
**[01:00] ---**
Wow, it's 9 pm already?
***SIGN*** Episode 3 "Baby Talk Spell"
***SIGN*** Episode 3 "Baby Talk Spell"
**[01:04] ---**
Wanna head home?
**[01:05] ---**
Yeah. We'll finish up tomorrow—
**[01:09] ---**
An announcement? At this hour?
**[01:15] ---**
Whad'd he jutht thay?
**[01:17] ---**
It wath a weird-thounding voithe...
**[01:19] ---**
Huh?
**[01:20] ---**
Why're we tawking wike ickle babieth?
**[01:22] ---**
I can't thtop!
**[01:24] ---**
Last night at 9 pm,
**[01:24] ---**
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**[01:24] ---**
Why?
**[01:24] ---**
Major IT Corp Workers Infantilized?!
**[01:24] ---**
Major IT Corp Workers Infantilized?!
**[01:24] ---**
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**[01:24] ---**
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**[01:24] ---**
Crotter Inc. Employees Talking Like Babies
**[01:24] ---**
Crotter Inc. Employees Talking Like Babies
**[01:26] ---**
employees at major tech company
Crotter began talking like babies.
**[01:32] ---**
I believe it's a form of
mass psychogenic illness.
**[01:32] ---**
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**[01:32] ---**
Exclusive
**[01:32] ---**
Exclusive
**[01:32] ---**
Is the Cause Mass Hysteria?
**[01:32] ---**
The Dark Side of Crotter Inc.
**[01:32] ---**
The Dark Side of Crotter Inc.
**[01:35] ---**
There have been plenty of rumors about
Crotter being an exploitative employer.
**[01:39] ---**
Man, their employees are talkin' like babies?
**[01:39] ---**
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**[01:39] ---**
The truth about the Crotter Inc baby talk scandal?!
**[01:39] ---**
Search
**[01:39] ---**
Top Chat
**[01:39] ---**
Exploitation confirmed
**[01:39] ---**
All the employees? Insane
**[01:39] ---**
Great reporting, Charabon!
**[01:39] ---**
lololololol
**[01:39] ---**
Boycotting Crotter now
**[01:39] ---**
This is all speculation, right?
**[01:39] ---**
Crotter scares me
**[01:39] ---**
1,524 watching now
**[01:39] ---**
Charabon Kibiku
**[01:39] ---**
13 subscribers
**[01:42] ---**
Crotter must really treat 'em like dirt.
**[01:45] ---**
"Crotter? More like Exploiter!"
**[01:45] ---**
Is Crotter exploiting their employees??
**[01:45] ---**
Is Crotter exploiting their employees??
**[01:45] ---**
News Anon
**[01:45] ---**
Thoundth thcary
**[01:45] ---**
Thoundth thcary
**[01:45] ---**
News Anon
**[01:45] ---**
I'm cwying
**[01:45] ---**
I'm cwying
**[01:45] ---**
Crotter? More
like Exploiter!
**[01:46] ---**
Talking like babies?
**[01:46] ---**
This Crotter news is
**[01:46] ---**
loltastic
**[01:47] ---**
You thaid it
**[01:47] ---**
I'm qwitting!
**[01:48] ---**
Their logo sucks
**[01:48] ---**
"Their president, Kuroki, is a total asshole, yeah."
**[01:48] ---**
Their president, Kuroki, is a total asshole, yeah
**[01:50] ---**
My boyfriend baby talking
**[01:50] ---**
"Crotter's stock is plummeting.
Serves 'em right!"
**[01:51] ---**
Crotter's stock is plummeting
**[01:51] ---**
Serves 'em right!
**[01:52] ---**
all the time would suck
**[01:54] ---**
In my roflcopter now
**[01:55] ---**
Oh, yes, I saw it on the news.
**[01:56] ---**
Phone
**[01:58] ---**
It sounds quite serious.
**[02:00] ---**
We need you to devewop
an Anti-Thpeww wight away.
**[02:03] ---**
We'ww pay you two miwwion yen fow it.
**[02:06] ---**
Oh, it got you too?
**[02:07] ---**
It thure did.
**[02:09] ---**
Can you geddit done by the enda th'day or not?!
**[02:11] ---**
Very well. We'll get started right away.
**[02:11] ---**
Phone
**[02:15] ---**
Chancellor. Two million yen...
Is that for developing another Anti-Spell?
**[02:19] ---**
Yes. He asked me to do it right away.
**[02:22] ---**
And here I was hoping we could make
world conquest pancakes today...
**[02:24] ---**
Yay!!
**[02:24] ---**
Yay!!
**[02:27] ---**
How will pancakes help
you conquer the world?!
**[02:29] ---**
Question is, how do we rack
up the thank-yous we need?
**[02:29] ---**
Phone
**[02:33] ---**
Good question.
**[02:34] ---**
Um...
**[02:35] ---**
Have you considered helping DX Fighter?
**[02:39] ---**
What? What are you talking about, Philip?
**[02:40] ---**
Phone
**[02:42] ---**
We're an evil secret society, remember?
**[02:44] ---**
Wait a minute.
**[02:45] ---**
Philip might've hit on a good idea for once.
**[02:47] ---**
What? You really want me to listen
to one of Philip's stupid ideas?
**[02:51] ---**
It's true that Philip is hideously
incompetent and worthless,
**[02:53] ---**
but that doesn't mean we should ignore *every*
nonsensical word that comes out of his mouth.
**[02:57] ---**
That's just mean.
**[02:58] ---**
Phone
**[02:58] ---**
Well, I don't have any better ideas.
**[03:01] ---**
Let's try it.
**[03:02] ---**
Com
**[03:02] ---**
Com
**[03:02] ---**
Com
**[03:02] ---**
pany
**[03:02] ---**
pany
**[03:02] ---**
pany
**[03:03] ---**
Get real. Why should I hire you?
**[03:05] ---**
Come on, don't be like that.
**[03:07] ---**
You need the help, don't you?
**[03:09] ---**
I just hired some help.
**[03:10] ---**
We just want to tag along for
some of your superhero stuff.
**[03:14] ---**
You don't have to pay us.
**[03:15] ---**
Well, if I must...
**[03:16] ---**
Sato! What's my schedule for today?
**[03:18] ---**
This afternoon, you're visiting the
pediatric ward at Karauri General,
**[03:22] ---**
and bagging a group of
remittance fraudsters.
**[03:24] ---**
Tonight, it's the mahjong den with reporters.
**[03:25] ---**
Slick
**[03:25] ---**
Slick
**[03:26] ---**
Wait a minute! You sure about that last one?
**[03:28] ---**
Could we tag along on
your hospital visit, perhaps?
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***SIGN*** Cabinet Special Investigations Room (NTS)
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***SIGN*** Cabinet Special Investigations Room (NTS)
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***SIGN*** Cabinet Special Investigations Room (NTS)
**[03:35] ---**
Sorry to bother you when you're so busy.
***SIGN*** Cabinet Special Investigations Room (NTS)
***SIGN*** Cabinet Special Investigations Room (NTS)
**[03:38] ---**
Not at all.
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***SIGN*** NTS Chief
Ootori Mifuyu
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***SIGN*** NTS Chief
Ootori Mifuyu
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***SIGN*** NTS Chief
Ootori Mifuyu
***SIGN*** NTS Chief
Ootori Mifuyu
***SIGN*** NTS Chief
Ootori Mifuyu
**[03:39] ---**
Are you familiar with the baby talk incident
currently transpiring at Crotter Inc?
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***SIGN*** NTS Councilor
Hyodo
***SIGN*** NTS Councilor
Hyodo
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***SIGN*** NTS Councilor
Hyodo
***SIGN*** NTS Councilor
Hyodo
***SIGN*** NTS Councilor
Hyodo
**[03:44] ---**
The "mass hysteria from
work stress" incident?
**[03:48] ---**
People don't start talking like
babies because they're stressed.
**[03:51] ---**
I always use baby talk with my wife,
even when I'm not stressed at all.
**[03:52] ---**
I'm feewing stwessed out from work!
**[03:52] ---**
I'm feewing stwessed out from work!
**[03:55] ---**
Too much information.
**[03:57] ---**
An investigation has
revealed that the victims
**[03:59] ---**
heard a strange announcement
over the PA moments before.
**[04:04] ---**
That PA announcement
must have been the cause.
**[04:07] ---**
Hypnosis of some kind?
**[04:09] ---**
Hypnosis uses the power of suggestion.
**[04:11] ---**
Not everyone is susceptible to it.
**[04:14] ---**
But every single person who heard that
announcement started talking like infants.
**[04:14] ---**
Goo goo gaga!
**[04:14] ---**
Goo goo gaga!
**[04:20] ---**
The implications are utterly terrifying.
**[04:22] ---**
You mean, "What if the spell had
been designed to kill them instantly,
**[04:25] ---**
instead of just changing their speech?"
**[04:27] ---**
Precisely.
**[04:29] ---**
This is a matter of
critical national security.
**[04:33] ---**
Investigate at once,
**[04:35] ---**
and find the person who
made that announcement.
**[04:37] ---**
Yes, sir.
**[04:40] ---**
Karauri General Hospital
**[04:40] ---**
Thank you for taking time out of your day.
**[04:43] ---**
Not at all.
**[04:44] ---**
Even if the pay's crap, brainwashing
these kids while they're young
**[04:48] ---**
means they'll buy my merch in the future.
**[04:48] ---**
Waaaant!!
**[04:48] ---**
Waaaant!!
**[04:50] ---**
I don't mind at all.
**[04:51] ---**
That's one asshole motivation!
**[04:52] ---**
I was really rather shocked
when you said you were coming,
**[04:55] ---**
and you wanted *us* to pay
you an appearance fee...
**[04:58] ---**
Sounds like it was kind of a burden...
**[04:59] ---**
I know!
**[05:00] ---**
Usually, I just shake hands
and sign autographs,
**[05:03] ---**
but how about I blow their little
minds with a Hero Show instead?
**[05:05] ---**
Would you?
**[05:07] ---**
Wash your
hands!!
**[05:07] ---**
I'm sure the children would love that!
**[05:09] ---**
Sugihara-san. A word, please?
**[05:11] ---**
Hm? Of course...
**[05:15] ---**
What is DX Fighter doing here?
**[05:17] ---**
Wash your
hands!!
**[05:17] ---**
I thought it might take the
children's minds off their conditions...
**[05:20] ---**
Still...
**[05:21] ---**
Don't you know kids hate that guy
even more than they hate redback spiders?
**[05:21] ---**
Hated more than
a redback spider!!
**[05:21] ---**
Hated more than
a redback spider!!
**[05:26] ---**
Wash your
hands!!
**[05:26] ---**
And you're even *paying* him?
**[05:28] ---**
I'm so sorry!
**[05:29] ---**
Wash your
hands!!
**[05:29] ---**
How hated *is* that DX Fighter guy?
**[05:31] ---**
If the children don't enjoy the show,
it'll spell serious trouble for Sugihara-san...
**[05:37] ---**
I hope this works.
**[05:38] ---**
Wash your
hands!!
**[05:38] ---**
The baby talk spell has a hostile
vibe value of negative 55.
**[05:41] ---**
The same as getting jealous
of your friend's cute girlfriend,
**[05:43] ---**
I saw her with
another guy!
**[05:44] ---**
and lying to him to break them up.
**[05:45] ---**
That's some pretty hostile vibes.
**[05:47] ---**
Hero
**[05:47] ---**
Show
**[05:48] ---**
Okay, everyone!
**[05:50] ---**
A superhero has come here
today to cheer you all up,
**[05:53] ---**
even though we didn't ask him to!
**[05:58] ---**
Heroes are TV nonsense.
**[06:00] ---**
If that stuff could cure us,
we wouldn't need hospitals!
**[06:03] ---**
Don't say that.
**[06:05] ---**
Recovery is partly psychological.
Haven't you heard of the placebo effect?
**[06:06] ---**
I'm Cured!!
**[06:06] ---**
I'm Cured!!
**[06:06] ---**
I'm Cured!!
**[06:06] ---**
I think!
**[06:06] ---**
I think!
**[06:06] ---**
Placibeaux
**[06:06] ---**
Placebo Effect:
Feeling better after
taking fake medicine!
**[06:06] ---**
Placebo Effect:
Feeling better after
taking fake medicine!
**[06:08] ---**
Nope!
**[06:10] ---**
They're getting pretty rowdy in there.
**[06:12] ---**
They're probably stressed out.
**[06:14] ---**
Hey, DX Fighter.
**[06:15] ---**
You'd better not go hitting
those kids with a DX Bomber.
**[06:18] ---**
Only a child would lose
his temper at children.
**[06:21] ---**
Then, let's call him out onto the stage.
**[06:24] ---**
DX Fighter!
**[06:28] ---**
Leave protecting the Earth to me!
**[06:30] ---**
DX Fighter is here! Nice to meet you!
**[06:35] ---**
Come on, everyone! Clap! Clap!
**[06:37] ---**
He came here for you,
even though we didn't ask him to!
**[06:40] ---**
Are you embarrassed?
**[06:42] ---**
You're the one who should be embarrassed!
**[06:44] ---**
What a stupid-looking outfit.
**[06:46] ---**
What was that?
**[06:47] ---**
I'll blast you with my DX Bomber!
**[06:49] ---**
You're gonna blast a child?
**[06:50] ---**
I'll post that on Crotter!
**[06:51] ---**
W-Wait!
**[06:53] ---**
Everyone, look!
**[06:54] ---**
It's an evil secret society!
**[06:59] ---**
Listen up, children.
This hospital is now mine!
**[07:04] ---**
This is the lamest evil
organization I've ever seen.
**[07:07] ---**
They look like subway workers.
**[07:08] ---**
That only applies to the chancellor.
**[07:10] ---**
No, I don't work there either.
**[07:11] ---**
Now, come at me!
**[07:12] ---**
I'll blast you away with the DX Bomber!
**[07:14] ---**
Right!
**[07:15] ---**
Okay, men.
**[07:17] ---**
Get him!
**[07:22] ---**
He got us!
**[07:23] ---**
You're using beams? That's cheating!
**[07:24] ---**
Shut up! I'm outnumbered here!
**[07:26] ---**
Curse you.
**[07:28] ---**
Okay, Doc, unleash the monster!
**[07:30] ---**
Right!
**[07:33] ---**
That's scary! Way too scary!
**[07:35] ---**
Calm down, everyone!
**[07:36] ---**
Don't worry!
**[07:37] ---**
It's just a show!
**[07:38] ---**
It's too realistic, Doc!
**[07:40] ---**
The children are
hyperventilating out of fear!
**[07:44] ---**
No fair! You ambushed him!
**[07:46] ---**
Make sure to heed the rules,
even when they're stupid!
**[07:50] ---**
And get your daily calcium.
**[07:51] ---**
I don't want to hear that from you!
**[07:52] ---**
DX Fighter sucks!
**[07:55] ---**
What was that?
**[07:56] ---**
I'll re-educate you all!
**[07:58] ---**
Don't you dare, DX Fighter!
**[08:01] ---**
Out of my way!
**[08:02] ---**
You've spoiled these children
and made them major brats!
**[08:05] ---**
Please... stop!
**[08:10] ---**
You'll pay for that!
**[08:14] ---**
Sugihara-san's awesome!
**[08:15] ---**
Get him!
**[08:17] ---**
She's so strong!
**[08:20] ---**
Curse you!
**[08:23] ---**
You're not bad...
**[08:27] ---**
I've dabbled in Gracie jiu-jitsu.
**[08:29] ---**
How'd that come about?!
**[08:31] ---**
But... how about this?
**[08:34] ---**
Rapid-Fire Double Bomber!
**[08:36] ---**
Take that! And that! And that!
**[08:39] ---**
So cool!
**[08:40] ---**
Get him!
**[08:45] ---**
That won't work on me twice!
**[08:47] ---**
She dodged it!
**[08:54] ---**
She did it!
**[08:55] ---**
What's going on here?!
**[09:00] ---**
Karauri General Hospital
**[09:01] ---**
Why did you beat up the hero?
**[09:03] ---**
I'm so sorry...
**[09:05] ---**
Director!
**[09:06] ---**
My spine hurts. I don't think I can
do any superhero-ing for a while.
**[09:11] ---**
You *will* compensate me
for lost wages, won't you?
**[09:14] ---**
Well... you're the one who
pushed to perform here...
**[09:19] ---**
What's that got to do with it?
**[09:21] ---**
Very well.
**[09:22] ---**
I'll write on Crotter that one
of your employees assaulted me.
**[09:22] ---**
DX Fighter
**[09:22] ---**
Please recrott!
**[09:22] ---**
An employee at Karauri
General Hospital assaulted me!!!!
It's gonna take two months
to recover!!!!
**[09:25] ---**
W-Wait a minute!
**[09:27] ---**
I'll quit as an apology.
**[09:29] ---**
And I'll pay DX Fighter's compensation, too.
**[09:33] ---**
Oh, really?
**[09:36] ---**
Here's my bank information.
I'll take 500,000—
**[09:36] ---**
Bank Info
**[09:39] ---**
Bank Info
**[09:39] ---**
Bank Info
**[09:41] ---**
You bogus hero!
**[09:42] ---**
Kids!
**[09:43] ---**
Director, we want you to look at this.
**[09:45] ---**
What is it?
**[09:47] ---**
He's spent his whole life in a wheelchair.
**[09:50] ---**
But after watching Sugihara-san,
now he can do capoeira.
**[09:55] ---**
This kid's been bedridden for months.
**[09:57] ---**
But now he can do slacklining.
**[09:59] ---**
No way!
**[10:00] ---**
It's the placebo effect.
**[10:00] ---**
Placibeaux
**[10:00] ---**
Placebo Effect
**[10:00] ---**
Placebo Effect
**[10:02] ---**
Watching Sugihara-san
fight encouraged us all.
**[10:06] ---**
So please, Sugihara-san! Don't quit!
**[10:09] ---**
Keep encouraging us like you did today!
**[10:12] ---**
You guys... Thank you!
**[10:15] ---**
Look!
**[10:16] ---**
That "thank you" scored a 55 positive rating!
**[10:19] ---**
We did it! Now we can make
an Anti-Spell for the baby talk!
**[10:23] ---**
Director.
**[10:24] ---**
I helped the kids feel better.
**[10:27] ---**
Could I trouble you for some more pay?
**[10:29] ---**
Look! DX Fighter's jackassery
scores a 200 negative rating!
**[10:32] ---**
How is he even a superhero?!
**[10:35] ---**
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**[10:35] ---**
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**[10:35] ---**
Hard Truth
**[10:35] ---**
Major IT Corp Infantalization Was Actually...
**[10:35] ---**
Major IT Corp Infantalization Was Actually...
**[10:35] ---**
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**[10:35] ---**
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**[10:35] ---**
The Baby Talk Was a Company Activity
**[10:35] ---**
The Baby Talk Was a Company Activity
**[10:35] ---**
Learning that the mass baby talk
incident that afflicted employees
**[10:39] ---**
at major tech company Crotter Inc
was just a company activity
**[10:43] ---**
has brought a strained smile to
the faces of all parties involved.
**[10:47] ---**
I see...
**[10:49] ---**
Perhaps I'll try an even
more interesting spell.
**[10:53] ---**
Help Spell
**[10:53] ---**
Help Spell
**[10:53] ---**
Help Spell
**[10:54] ---**
Well? What will you do now?