E1 - In this world where monsters are rampant...

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Don't Hurt Me,
SIGN    Don't Hurt Me,
SIGN    My Healer!
[00:01] Alvin
    Behold, the vast world in which we live!
[00:04] Alvin
    It is rampant with monsters
    that threaten human life.
[00:10] Alvin
    This threat is opposed by
    countless adventurers! Heroes!
[00:17] Alvin
    Every day, they face these
    dangerous battles...
[00:21] Alvin
    To protect the people! To protect the world!
[00:27] Alvin
    And I, Alvin, am one of them!
[00:32] Alvin
    Wow, an encounter already!
[00:35] Alvin
    All right!
[00:36] Alvin
    Here we go!
SIGN    "In this world where monsters are rampant..."
[00:41] Mostly Bear
    Kuma!
[00:48] Alvin
    Curse you...
[00:50] Alvin
    Stronger than I expected,
    given those cute button eyes...
[00:53] Mostly Bear
    Kuma!
[00:56] Alvin
    No!
[01:12] Alvin
    This is... not good!
[01:14] Carla
    Excuse me...
[01:15] Carla
    Are you having trouble?
[01:18] Carla
    It's a pleasure to meet you.
[01:20] Carla
    I'm a healer.
    My name is Carla, the dark elf.
[01:25] Alvin
    The pleasure is all mine!
[01:27] Alvin
    I'm Alvin, the human...
[01:29] Alvin
    I'm working as a warrior...
[01:31] Alvin
    But this is no time for niceties!
[01:34] Carla
    Are you all right?
[01:36] Alvin
    Does it look like I'm all right?!
[01:38] Alvin
    Quit standing there and help me already!
[01:44] Carla
    If you want to ask for someone's help,
[01:46] Carla
    shouldn't you kneel down in front of them
    and press your forehead to the ground?!
[01:55] Alvin
    A moment, if you please?
[01:57] Mostly Bear
    Gao.
[01:58] Carla
    Oh? Is something the matter?
[02:01] Alvin
    That was supposed to be the
    part where you help me.
[02:04] Alvin
    Why the hell are you asking me to grovel?!
[02:07] Carla
    Why are you yelling at me all of a sudden?
[02:09] Carla
    Are you overly stressed, perhaps?
[02:12] Alvin
    I'm only stressed because of this situation!
[02:14] Carla
    You're angry that the magibeast
    was about to beat you,
[02:16] Carla
    so you're taking it out on me?
[02:18] Carla
    You should really take responsibility
    for your own failings...
[02:20] Alvin
    Would you shut up?!
[02:22] Carla
    You yelled at me again!
[02:24] Carla
    Humans are scary! I hate you!
[02:26] Alvin
    H-Hang on!
    It's really not worth crying over!
[02:29] Alvin
    I'm sorry for yelling, okay?!
[02:34] Carla
    Sorry?
[02:35] Carla
    Not painfully remorseful?
[02:38] Alvin
    You little...
[02:40] Alvin
    No, stop it.
    Don't let her take control.
[02:43] Alvin
    Just engage her calmly,
    like a mature adult...
[02:48] Carla
    Stare...
[02:52] Carla
    Well? Where's that "painfully remorseful"?
[02:56] Alvin
    I can't do it... I'm gonna blow!
[02:58] Mostly Bear
    Gao?
[03:00] Alvin
    Oh, crap! I totally forgot!
[03:02] Alvin
    H-Hang on a little longer, would you?
[03:06] Alvin
    All right, here's what we'll do.
[03:08] Alvin
    Carla, was it?
[03:09] Alvin
    If you help me, I'll do one thing you ask!
[03:13] Carla
    Anything you ask?!
[03:14] Alvin
    Within reason, of course!
[03:16] Carla
    Grovel, then!
[03:17] Alvin
    Is that your kink or something?!
[03:18] Carla
    Actually, forget about that.
[03:21] Carla
    Instead, Alvin-san...
[03:23] Carla
    I'd like you to form a party with me!
[03:26] Alvin
    Party?
[03:27] Carla
    The truth is, I've never
    been in a party before.
[03:31] Alvin
    Understandable, given the
    whole personality thing.
[03:34] Carla
    No one will actually talk to me.
[03:37] Carla
    I guess they all think
    I'm out of their league.
[03:41] Alvin
    More like leagues beneath a noxious swamp...
[03:43] Alvin
    And that's the worst wink I've ever seen.
[03:45] Alvin
    Anyway, I guess that's fine.
[03:48] Carla
    Th-Thank you, Alvin-san!
[03:51] Alvin
    I can just ditch her later, after all.
[03:53] Alvin
    Just so you know,
    my adventurer rank isn't very high.
[03:57] Alvin
    So don't get your hopes up!
[03:59] Carla
    Don't worry!
    My hopes were low from the start!
[04:01] Alvin
    That's not the part where you agree!
[04:04] Alvin
    And knock off the thumbs up!
[04:06] Alvin
    Anyway, could you make with the healing?
[04:08] Carla
    Of the nation?
[04:09] Alvin
    No, of me!
[04:10] Carla
    Of you?
[04:11] Carla
    But you seemed in pretty good shape with
    all the yapping you've been doing...
[04:15] Alvin
    Phrasing, please!
[04:16] Carla
    Oh, I know.
[04:18] Carla
    I think someone wants to be coddled!
[04:20] Alvin
    Could just you get to it?
[04:21] Carla
    I was just trying to lighten the mood.
[04:24] Alvin
    Well, please don't. You stink at it.
[04:27] Carla
    All right. Here I go!
[04:31] Alvin
    This is so annoying.
[04:33] Alvin
    I'm ditching her the minute the battle—
[04:36] Carla
    Hold still!
[04:38] Carla
    Your heart is still moving.
[04:40] Alvin
    I'd be dead if it wasn't!
[04:44] Carla
    Don't shout at me like that!
[04:47] Carla
    You made me curse you accidentally!
[04:50] Alvin
    You're the one who—
[04:52] Alvin
    Wait, what did you say?
[04:53] Carla
    I placed a curse on you accidentally.
[04:56] Carla
    Tee-hee!
[04:57] Alvin
    A healer who curses people is a little
    avant-garde, don't you think?!
[05:00] Carla
    Please remain calm.
[05:01] Carla
    It's not much of a curse, really.
[05:04] Alvin
    R-Really?
[05:05] Carla
    It'll just kill you if
    we get 300 meters apart.
[05:09] Alvin
    K-Kill me...
[05:15] Carla
    G-Gosh... I know you're grateful,
    but you don't have to grovel.
[05:19] Carla
    It's a little off-putting, really.
[05:21] Alvin
    I'm not grateful, I'm despondent!
[05:24] Alvin
    What am I supposed to do?!
[05:25] Alvin
    I can't ditch you like this!
[05:27] Carla
    Th-That's awful!
[05:28] Carla
    You were just having your fun with me?!
[05:30] Alvin
    I assure you, none of this is fun for me!
[05:32] Mostly Bear
    Would you two please calm down, gao?
[05:35] Alvin
    Who's that?
[05:36] Mostly Bear
    It's not good to fight, kuma.
[05:38] Mostly Bear
    Alvin-san.
[05:40] Mostly Bear
    It's really not nice to yell
    at a young lady, bear.
[05:43] Mostly Bear
    And, Carla-chan, you could be a bit
    more considerate of his feelings, gao.
[05:47] Mostly Bear
    It's important for a
    party to be civil, kuma.
[05:50] Mostly Bear
    Let's talk it out, bear.
[05:52] Mostly Bear
    Okay, gao?
[05:54] Alvin
    Where'd this articulate
    commentary come from?!
[05:56] Alvin
    And get your speech tic consistent already!
[06:03] Carla
    Ahem!
[06:04] Carla
    This cycle of abuse won't get us anywhere.
[06:06] Carla
    I'm willing to open a dialogue.
[06:08] Carla
    The topic is...
[06:09] Carla
    The tendency of warriors
    to look down on healers!
[06:12] Alvin
    Sorry to interrupt already,
[06:14] Alvin
    but I have objections regarding this topic.
[06:16] Alvin
    And I'm curious about one other thing...
[06:18] Carla
    Does the accused have a statement?
[06:20] Alvin
    Well, now I have another objection...
[06:22] Alvin
    But setting that aside for now...
[06:24] Alvin
    Why is the magibeast a part of this?
[06:27] Carla
    Oh, how reprehensible!
[06:29] Carla
    Just because you're a magibeast,
[06:31] Carla
    he doesn't want to give you
    a voice in the conversation!
[06:34] Alvin
    It's more the fact that we
    were fighting a minute ago!
[06:37] Carla
    Truly reprehensible!
[06:38] Carla
    Magibeasts are living things, just as we are!
[06:41] Carla
    Different though our forms may be, if only
    we would join hands in the spirit of kinship,
[06:45] Carla
    we could surely achieve understanding!
[06:47] Alvin
    Seems a little late to pull
    out the "holy woman" act!
[06:53] Mostly Bear
    May I, kuma?
[06:55] Alvin
    He has a proposal?
[06:56] Carla
    I'm told that the longest-lived magibeasts
[06:59] Carla
    have high intelligence and
    a wealth of experience.
[07:03] Alvin
    Well, maybe if we're talking
    about dragons and stuff...
[07:06] Alvin
    Before you give your opinion,
    could we have your name?
[07:10] Mostly Bear
    Oh, forgive my rudeness, gao.
[07:13] Mostly Bear
    Hmm... Our species doesn't have what your
    kind refer to as "names," kuma...
[07:19] Alvin
    Despite the high intelligence, he still
    can't keep the speech tic consistent.
[07:23] Mostly Bear
    But your kind tends to call our
    species the "Mostly Bear," bear.
[07:29] Alvin
    That's pretty darn lazy!
[07:31] Carla
    What were you going to say, Mostly-san?
[07:33] Mostly Bear
    Oh, yes, kuma.
[07:35] Mostly Bear
    It occurred to me when I was watching
    your conversation earlier...
[07:38] Mostly Bear
    First, Carla-chan.
[07:40] Mostly Bear
    Your healer class is a very
    vulnerable one, kuma.
[07:45] Mostly Bear
    The purpose of the warrior
    class is to protect you.
[07:49] Mostly Bear
    So if he dies, that would
    put you in danger, as well.
[07:53] Mostly Bear
    You seem like a very intelligent person,
[07:55] Mostly Bear
    so I'm sure you know what that
    indicates for your behavior, right?
[08:00] Mostly Bear
    And Alvin-san, the accused.
[08:03] Alvin
    "Accused"...
[08:04] Mostly Bear
    Even if you were engaged in combat,
[08:05] Mostly Bear
    you used extremely abusive language
    towards someone you'd just met.
[08:09] Mostly Bear
    The way you spoke seemed to suggest,
[08:10] Mostly Bear
    "all healers are expected to heal all warriors,
    even ones they've just met,"
[08:15] Mostly Bear
    which is a very arrogant attitude, kuma.
[08:17] Mostly Bear
    Elves are very sensitive
    to negative emotions, gao.
[08:20] Mostly Bear
    It's very possible she picked
    up on that hostility, bear.
[08:26] Mostly Bear
    I'm sorry to subject you to
    this awful lecture, gao.
[08:30] Mostly Bear
    But if you're going to be a party,
    that means you'll need each other!
[08:34] Mostly Bear
    And it appears, Alvin-san,
    that you'll have to remain
[08:37] Mostly Bear
    within 300 meters of Carla-chan
    for the foreseeable future.
[08:40] Mostly Bear
    I think it's important to approach each day
    with a spirit of respect and gratitude, kuma!
[08:45] Alvin
    A-A truly great speech, as expected of a
    magibeast that can speak the human tongue.
[08:48] Alvin
    His long lifespan has afforded
    him great wisdom indeed!
[08:54] Alvin
    Hey!
[08:55] Alvin
    Were you sleeping through
    that whole nice speech?!
[08:58] Carla
    Of course I wasn't!
[09:00] Alvin
    You were so!
[09:01] Carla
    Don't tell me... you've never
    heard of "sleep learning"?
[09:05] Alvin
    So you were sleeping!
[09:07] Alvin
    Sit down right now!
[09:08] Carla
    But why—
[09:09] Alvin
    Just sit down!
[09:11] Carla
    Fine...
[09:12] Alvin
    What exactly is your problem?
[09:14] Alvin
    It's like you don't even
    care that you cursed me!
[09:17] Mostly Bear
    Calm down, kuma!
[09:19] Alvin
    No way! There are some kinds of people
    where you need to take a firm hand!
[09:23] Mostly Bear
    Now, now, gao...
[09:24] Alvin
    And what kind of thoughtless jerk falls
    asleep when someone's talking to them?!
[09:28] Mostly Bear
    Now, now, kuma...
[09:29] Alvin
    That's only allowed when
    it's the school principal!
[09:33] Mostly Bear
    Now, now! That's not good either, bear!
[09:35] Carla
    What about your local representative?!
[09:37] Alvin
    Napping in front of government
    officials is strictly forbidden!
[09:40] Mostly Bear
    Napping in front of your principal
    should be strictly forbidden, too, kuma!
[09:44] Mostly Bear
    And what are you even talking about, bear?
[09:46] Alvin
    This magibeast has lived a
    very long time, you know!
[09:49] Mostly Bear
    Er...
[09:50] Alvin
    Which means he's your elder!
SIGN    m 0 0 l 200 0 l 200 136 l 0 136
SIGN    m 0 0 l 200 0 l 200 136 l 0 136
SIGN    Dark Elf (Female)
    72 Years Old
    (14-15 in Human Years)
[09:52] Alvin
    You should show him some respect!
[09:54] Alvin
    Am I right here?!
[09:55] Alvin
    It's important to be kind to your elders!
SIGN    m 0 0 l 200 0 l 200 136 l 0 136
SIGN    m 0 0 l 200 0 l 200 136 l 0 136
SIGN    Mostly Bear
    324 Years Old
    (43-44 in Human Years)
SIGN    m 0 0 l 200 0 l 200 136 l 0 136
SIGN    m 0 0 l 200 0 l 200 136 l 0 136
SIGN    Human (Male)
    30 Years Old
    (7-8 in Warrior Lv.)
[09:58] Alvin
    Honor thy grandmother and grandfather!
[10:02] Mostly Bear
    Never discuss a lady's age, gao!
[10:17] Carla
    My legs!
[10:20] Carla
    Paralyze!
[10:22] Carla
    Paralyze is not paradise!
[10:24] Mostly Bear
    Oh, dear, kuma!
[10:27] Mostly Bear
    What do I do, gao?
[10:30] Mostly Bear
    What to do... What to do, gao?!
[10:35] Mostly Bear
    Kuma!
[10:37] Mostly Bear
    Behold the fearsome power
    of the magibeast, bear!
[10:41] Carla
    J-Just kill me...
[11:03] Alvin
    I feel like I've been through
    a serious ordeal...
[11:07] Mostly Bear
    Oh, thank goodness!
[11:08] Mostly Bear
    You're awake, bear?
[11:10] Mostly Bear
    I just picked you some aurange fruits.
[11:13] Mostly Bear
    Try one. It'll perk you right up, gao.
[11:17] Alvin
    Thanks...
[11:19] Alvin
    This is great!
[11:22] Alvin
    Is this your house?
[11:24] Mostly Bear
    Yes, it's my burrow.
[11:26] Alvin
    Burrow?
[11:27] Mostly Bear
    I'm just so glad you're alive, bear!
[11:30] Mostly Bear
    A hit like that really could
    have killed you, kuma.
[11:34] Mostly Bear
    Of course, I'm the one
    that inflicted it, gao...
[11:37] Alvin
    I didn't realize you were actually a woman.
[11:40] Alvin
    I'm sorry for speaking so rudely.
[11:44] Mostly Bear
    I'm sorry, too, bear.
[11:46] Alvin
    So, are you the one who
    nursed me back to health?
[11:48] Mostly Bear
    It wasn't me, kuma.
[11:51] Mostly Bear
    She seems to have her own
    feelings on the subject.
[11:55] Mostly Bear
    Carla-chan spent the entire time treating
    you with healing spells, bear.
[11:59] Alvin
    Healing spells?
[12:02] Carla
    Is it morning already?
[12:04] Carla
    I'd like bread for breakfast.
[12:06] Carla
    And I like my coffee with
    lots of milk and sugar,
[12:09] Carla
    and honey on my yogurt.
[12:12] Alvin
    You're a picky one, huh?
[12:14] Alvin
    And that outfit... I know what that's for!
SIGN    Picture shown for
    
    illustration purpose only.
    
    Actual Carlas may vary.
SIGN    Picture shown for
    
    illustration purpose only.
    
    Actual Carlas may vary.
[12:17] Carla
    Harattama! Kiyottama!
[12:17] Alvin
    It's for pounding nails into
    an effigy to curse someone!
[12:19] Carla
    Let this curse never be lifted!
[12:25] Mostly Bear
    You were in such awful shape, bear.
[12:27] Mostly Bear
    The first healing spell didn't suffice,
[12:29] Mostly Bear
    so she had to keep doing it, gao.
[12:32] Alvin
    That's a scary number of pins!
[12:33] Mostly Bear
    She called it a kind of
    magical acupuncture, gao.
[12:37] Mostly Bear
    But you can see your wounds
    have healed, bear.
[12:40] Mostly Bear
    That's all thanks to Carla-chan, kuma!
[12:42] Alvin
    I seem all right... for now...
[12:44] Alvin
    But I'm not letting my guard down!
[12:47] Carla
    Breakfast...
[12:50] Alvin
    Hey.
[13:00] Mostly Bear
    Gracious me...
[13:01] Mostly Bear
    She's so relieved, she's crying, bear.
[13:04] Carla
    I'morra bufeburoo...
[13:06] Alvin
    You seem to be crying in
    a very self-serving way.
[13:09] Carla
    I'm so sor—
[13:11] Carla
    I'm so sowwy.
[13:13] Alvin
    Why did you change it halfway?!
[13:14] Carla
    I did the best I could to
    cast healing spells on you.
[13:18] Carla
    But the damage was just so bad.
[13:20] Carla
    I did manage to fix your body...
[13:23] Carla
    but your face was so unsightly...
[13:24] Alvin
    Phrasing, plea—
[13:26] Alvin
    Wait, my face?
[13:27] Carla
    The wounds on your face were so bad,
[13:28] Carla
    and I, at least, wanted to get the
    general layout back to normal...
[13:31] Alvin
    Did she have to reshape it?
[13:33] Carla
    I got it as close as I could
    to your original face...
[13:36] Carla
    But it just didn't work out, and...
[13:37] Carla
    Now your face looks really stupid!
[13:41] Alvin
    Complex burn?
[13:42] Mostly Bear
    I'm afraid it's not even half-baked.
[13:45] Alvin
    Huh? Was that supposed to be a joke?
[13:48] Alvin
    You dropped your speech tic, too.
[13:49] Mostly Bear
    Your face just looked so awful, kuma...
[13:52] Mostly Bear
    There was just nothing we could do, gao.
[13:54] Alvin
    Phrasing, please!
[13:55] Mostly Bear
    Have a look, bear.
[13:57] Alvin
    You have a hand mirror?
[13:59] Mostly Bear
    A lady has to look her best!
[14:01] Alvin
    Magibeasts care about that?
[14:03] Alvin
    But, okay...
[14:05] Alvin
    It sounds like the wounds on
    my face haven't fully healed?
[14:08] karly
    I'm so sowwy...
[14:10] Alvin
    You like that phrasing, huh?
[14:12] Alvin
    You said there was nothing you could do,
    but it felt perfectly fine to me...
[14:18] Alvin
    What?!
[14:20] Mostly Bear
    Please don't hold it
    against Carla-chan, bear!
[14:24] Mostly Bear
    She worked so hard to
    restore your face, kuma...
[14:28] Mostly Bear
    But she lacked the sheer magic power...
[14:29] Mostly Bear
    And it turned out just
    barely passable, bear...
[14:34] Mostly Bear
    Carla-chan, please don't cry!
[14:38] Carla
    I mean, I'd never even seen what Alvin-san's
    face looked like before this...
[14:43] Mostly Bear
    It's not your fault, bear.
[14:45] Mostly Bear
    If you wish to hate someone, hate me!
[14:47] Mostly Bear
    Hate me, a magibeast, kuma!
[14:50] Alvin
    Actually, it looks exactly
    like it always did...
[14:54] Mostly Bear
    I'm used to being hated by your kind, kuma!
[14:57] Mostly Bear
    It's all my fault, gao!
[14:58] Carla
    No, it's my fault!
[15:00] Carla
    If only I had been stronger!
[15:03] Alvin
    I'm telling you, it's back to normal!
[15:05] Alvin
    And I look pretty healthy at that!
[15:15] Alvin
    I'm telling you...
[15:16] Alvin
    my face looks totally like it always did!
[15:19] Carla
    Thank goodness! You're awake!
[15:22] Alvin
    I've been awake!
[15:23] Alvin
    Are you gonna pretend like
    none of that ever happened?
[15:25] Carla
    After injuries of such severity...
[15:27] Carla
    This is truly a miracle of God!
[15:29] Alvin
    What was all that about
    me having a stupid face?
[15:31] Carla
    Go, go, God! Viva God!
[15:34] Alvin
    What was that "barely passable" stuff?
[15:36] Carla
    And go, me, too! Viva Carla!
[15:39] Mostly Bear
    Gao!
[15:44] Mostly Bear
    I'll leave your mantle here, gao.
[15:46] Alvin
    Thanks.
[15:48] Alvin
    You seem to have a lot of equipment here.
[15:51] Mostly Bear
    Well, I was quite a wild one in my youth.
[15:55] Mostly Bear
    I picked more than my share of fights
    with adventurers back then, bear.
[15:59] Mostly Bear
    They're a bit like trophies from
    that time in my life, gao.
[16:02] Alvin
    Oh?
[16:05] Alvin
    I guess a person's personality
    changes when they get ol—
[16:09] Alvin
    Ol... Ol... Ol...
[16:11] Alvin
    Oleander, a type of tree!
[16:16] Mostly Bear
    You're such a considerate person, kuma.
[16:20] Mostly Bear
    I think you and Carla-chan
    will get along well.
[16:23] Alvin
    I really wish I could agree with you there!
[16:26] Mostly Bear
    Give it your best, bear.
[16:31] Carla
    This feels really right.
[16:41] Carla
    In the name of God, I'll punish you!
[16:44] Carla
    Holy Beam!
[16:50] sign
    m 0 0 l 100 0 l 100 45 l 0 45
[16:50] sign
    Alvin's 
    Mantle  
[16:57] Mostly Bear
    You're leaving already, bear?
[16:59] Alvin
    Yeah.
[17:00] Mostly Bear
    Y-You're sure you wouldn't
    like to stay longer, kuma?
[17:04] Mostly Bear
    It feels like we were brought
    together for a reason, gao...
[17:07] Mostly Bear
    You could always stay the night, bear.
[17:10] Alvin
    You know I can't do that.
[17:12] Alvin
    I'm a person. You're a magibeast.
[17:14] Alvin
    We didn't belong together
    in the first place!
[17:18] Mostly Bear
    I... I suppose, gao.
[17:21] Alvin
    But I'll warn you—I'm quite a sore loser!
[17:24] Alvin
    You took me by surprise this time.
[17:26] Alvin
    But next time, you won't get me so easily!
[17:28] Mostly Bear
    Bear?
[17:29] Alvin
    I'll be back for a rematch very soon!
[17:32] Alvin
    And you'd better be ready when I do!
[17:37] Alvin
    You get it?
[17:38] Mostly Bear
    G-Gao!
[17:42] Mostly Bear
    Ha, ha, ha, ha!
[17:44] Mostly Bear
    Kuma! Kuma, kuma!
[17:47] Mostly Bear
    You are quite a spirited human, gao!
[17:49] Mostly Bear
    Very well!
[17:50] Mostly Bear
    When you come for me,
    I'll give you quite a welcome, bear!
[17:53] Alvin
    I'll be counting on it.
[17:55] Alvin
    In the meantime, get that
    speech tic consistent!
[17:58] Mostly Bear
    Kuma, kuma, kuma!
[18:05] Carla
    Stop this right now!
[18:07] Mostly Bear
    You beared me, gao!
[18:09] Alvin
    What is it? What's wrong?
[18:10] Carla
    What do you think?
[18:13] Carla
    Why... Why do you have to fight?!
[18:16] Carla
    Why... after we'd finally become friends...
[18:19] Mostly Bear
    Now, wait a minute, kuma...
[18:20] Carla
    Why do you have to swear to fight again?
[18:24] Alvin
    Seriously, read the mood...
[18:24] Mostly Bear
    Seriously, read the mood, gao...
[18:27] Carla
    I thought we'd finally found proof that
    magibeasts and humans could get along...
[18:31] Alvin
    But we do get along!
[18:32] Alvin
    This is just kind of...
    a face-saving thing...
[18:36] Alvin
    I really wish you'd just read the mood...
[18:38] Carla
    Why can't you ever stop hating
    and harming each other?!
[18:41] Alvin
    It's really not like that!
[18:42] Alvin
    We really do get along!
[18:44] Alvin
    We're just pretending to be enemies,
    for appearances' sake...
[18:47] Alvin
    I'm pretty sure you're not
    supposed to explain this stuff.
[18:49] Alvin
    It feels super embarrassing...
[18:51] Carla
    You can't fool me!
[18:54] Carla
    You were injured, and Mostly-san
    brought you all this way...
[18:59] Carla
    She's your benefactor... 
    Your bearnefactor!
[19:04] Carla
    But you can't even be grateful!
[19:07] Carla
    That said, I'm the one who
    actually healed you...
[19:11] Carla
    So, in a way, I'm the one who
    deserves most of the credit...
[19:16] Carla
    Not that it's all that big a deal...
[19:19] Carla
    But I really feel like you should show
[19:22] Carla
    a little gratitude and respect to
    the person who helped you out...
[19:27] Mostly Bear
    Bear?
[19:28] Carla
    Of course, it's not like I picked this
    class to have people indebted to me...
[19:34] Carla
    But if you really wanted to 
    express your gratitude to me,
[19:39] Carla
    I suppose I wouldn't turn you down...
[19:44] Carla
    So if you wanted to give this mace
    to me, I wouldn't turn it down.
[19:49] Carla
    I certainly wouldn't turn it down!
SIGN    Give me a reward!
[19:52] Carla
    Thanks a bunch!
[20:02] Alvin
    So you just took it, huh?
[20:05] Carla
    As compensation for my services, of course.
[20:07] Alvin
    It felt more like you fast-talked
    your way into it, to me...
[20:11] Alvin
    Anyway, how long does this
    "I die if we split up" curse last?
[20:15] Alvin
    Isn't there any way to lift it?
[20:20] Alvin
    Everything you do ticks me off!
[20:23] Alvin
    Every wave! Every step!
[20:26] Alvin
    I guess we're stuck together
    for a while, then!
[20:29] Carla
    Indeed. To my great displeasure.
[20:31] Alvin
    The displeasure is all mine,
    I can promise you that!
[20:34] Alvin
    But ah, well.
[20:36] Alvin
    You remember how I promised I'd do one
    thing you asked if you helped me?
[20:40] Carla
    Yes.
[20:41] Alvin
    You saved me from my serious injuries.
[20:43] Alvin
    So I'll do what you asked.
[20:44] Alvin
    I'll form a party with you!
[20:47] Alvin
    Look after me.
[20:49] Carla
    S... Same to you.
[20:53] Alvin
    That hurt!
[20:55] Carla
    Oh, I didn't mean...
[20:57] Carla
    I guess you're pretty sad you didn't
    get to hold a girl's hand, though.
[21:01] Alvin
    What was that?!
[21:02] Carla
    Yelling won't erase the
    fact that I was right!
[21:06] Alvin
    Trying to prove my innocence
    is annoying, too!
[21:10] Carla
    Tee-hee!
SIGN    Don't Hurt Me,
SIGN    Don't Hurt Me,
SIGN    My Healer!
[22:27] Carla
    By the way, Alvin-hyan...
[22:29] Alvin
    What is it, Carla-hyan?
[22:31] Carla
    Where are we staying tonight?
[22:34] Carla
    It'll be morning by the
    time we reach a town.
[22:38] Alvin
    Not sure...
[22:40] Carla
    Mostly-san offered to let us stay
    the night and everything...
[22:43] Alvin
    You...
[22:44] Alvin
    After all that posturing,
    there's no way I could've stayed the night!
[22:48] Alvin
    And it would be way too
    embarrassing to go back now...
[22:51] Carla
    Alvin-san?
[22:54] Alvin
    What now?
[22:55] Carla
    I'm suddenly getting a very
    keen and powerful intuition...
[22:59] Carla
    You're actually extremely
     incompetent, aren't you?
[23:02] Carla
    You can't even object?
[23:05] Carla
    Bingo.
[23:06] Alvin
    You're quite sure of yourself, huh?
[23:07] Carla
    But don't worry, Alvin-san!
    I'm with you!
[23:12] Carla
    Just leave everything to me!
SIGN    Next Time
[23:25] Alvin
    Next episode's title is
[23:27] Alvin
    "Forced to travel
    with Carla, a healer,
[23:29] Alvin
    Alvin resumes his original quest
    to gather antidote herbs,
[23:34] Alvin
    but on the way he ends up getting
    attacked in a graveyard by ghosts
[23:36] Alvin
    which they manage to escape
    unexpectedly, but then..."
SIGN    "Forced to travel with Carla, a healer, Alvin resumes his original
    quest to gather antidote herbs, but on the way he ends up getting
    attacked in a graveyard by ghosts which they manage to escape
    unexpectedly, but then fall into a trap set by goblins and basically
    the first half of the episode is filled with great suffering but Carla's
    curse is still in effect so he can't get away from her and there's
    even more suffering in store nevertheless and anyway these titles
    are really long and kind of serve double-duty as next episode
    previews and we're pretty curious about how many people
    actually listen to the whole thing and that's the deal with episode 2"
SIGN    See you then!