Season 1

1 - Love & Eros For All / The Nightmare Before Carnaval

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Horse
    Let's go!
[00:03] CM
    This is Denki-gai, the city of dreams!
[00:07] CM
    If you want to buy comics, visit Umanohone!
SIGN    Comic Umanohone Denki-gai Store
[00:10] CM
    We've got games,
[00:11] CM
    anime,
[00:12] CM
    and doujinshi...
[00:13] CM
    All of your favorites packed inside!
SIGN    Comic Umanohone Denki-gai Store A three-minute walk from Denki-gai Station! Super close!!!!
[00:17] CM
    Comic Umanohone in Denki-gai,
    open year-round!
[00:21] ---
    We're waiting for you!
[00:27] Hiotan
    Welco—
SIGN    Hiotan
[00:34] Fugirl
    W-Welcome.
SIGN    Fu Girl
SIGN    Sensei
[00:39] Sensei
    Wel-Welcome!
[00:41] Kameko
    Welcome!
[00:43] Kameko
    This item comes with a bonus
    gift exclusive to this store!
SIGN    Kameko
SIGN    Sommelier Umio
[00:46] Umio
    Welcome.
SIGN    Director
[00:54] Director
    Let's do this.
SIGN    Manager
SIGN    Love & Eros For All
SIGN    Recommended Doujinshi
SIGN    Anman Paradise
    AnPara anime
    season 2 airing now!
[02:49] Umio
    Shrink-wrapping this new
    volume is taking forever.
[02:51] Hiotan
    It takes longer when it includes bonuses.
[02:53] Sensei
    Put book in machine, apply shrink-wrap...
[02:56] Sensei
    Put book in machine, apply shrink-wrap...
[02:58] Sensei
    ...in machine, apply shrink-wrap...
[03:02] Sensei
    Shrink-wrap... Shrink... Sh—
[03:09] Umio
    Sensei-san!
[03:09] Hiotan
    Sensei-chan!
[03:11] Sensei
    Oh, sorry... I haven't
    slept in several days...
[03:15] Umio
    You haven't slept?
[03:21] Hiotan
    It's jammed...
[03:22] Umio
    I'll take a look.
[03:23] Umio
    Let's see...
[03:25] Umio
    Oh, the film is jammed.
[03:29] Umio
    I'm not sure I can get it out...
[03:34] Director
    Hiotan.
[03:35] Hiotan
    Yes?
[03:36] Director
    A moment.
[03:37] Hiotan
    Right!
SIGN    Area for Age 18+
SIGN    Milky Time
[04:02] Hiotan
    That kind of behavior in the 18+ area...
[04:06] Hiotan
    I see. That is suspicious.
[04:07] Director
    Right?
[04:08] Hiotan
    You think she...
[04:10] Hiotan
    ...really likes ero books?!
[04:13] Director
    Go talk to her.
[04:14] Hiotan
    Okay!
[04:18] Hiotan
    Excuse me, ma'am...
[04:20] Hiotan
    Are you, um...
[04:23] Hiotan
    an ero book lover?!
[04:28] Director
    I'm very sorry. Is there
    anything we can help you with?
[04:32] Gman
    Pleased to meet you. This is who I am.
[04:35] Hiotan
    Oh, thank you...
SIGN    Tokyo Youth Development Counselor
[04:37] Hiotan
    "Tokyo Youth Development Counselor"?
[04:41] Director
    Also known as an Ero Books G-man.
[04:43] Hiotan
    Huh?! Ero Books G-man? What's that?
[04:46] Director
    She's a government worker who
    visits unannounced to make sure
[04:50] Director
    adult books are properly
    separated from others,
[04:52] Director
    and that they can't be
    read within the store.
[04:54] Hiotan
    If you knew that, you should've told me!
[04:57] Gman
    These two.
[04:58] Gman
    These two magazines have been
    designated by law to be adult-only.
[05:03] Gman
    Please take the appropriate measures.
[05:05] Director
    If that's the case...
[05:07] Director
    A seal to prevent reading in-store!
[05:10] Director
    We just put this here.
[05:12] Director
    Is this all right?
[05:14] Gman
    That will be fine.
[05:15] Director
    Okay, all of you...
[05:17] Director
    Umio, Hiotan, and Sommelier, place seals
    to prevent in-store reading on all these.
[05:21] Umio
    Wow.
[05:22] Hiotan
    That's a lot.
[05:23] Gman
    Thank you for your cooperation.
[05:33] Kameko
    Sommelier-san, it's just
    about time to get ready.
[05:38] Hiotan
    Oh, right. You have a sommelier party today.
[05:41] Umio
    What's a sommelier party?
[05:43] Hiotan
    You haven't seen it yet, Umi-chan?
[05:45] Hiotan
    Let's go together later.
[05:47] Hiotan
    It's in the event space on the sixth floor.
[05:49] Umio
    Okay.
[05:50] Umio
    But a lot of the people here at
    Uma have strange nicknames...
[05:55] Umio
    Like Sommelier-san, and Director...
[05:57] Hiotan
    Director? That's...
[06:01] Hiotan
    N-N-N-N-N—
[06:03] Hiotan
    Because he likes to make unusual movies...
[06:06] Umio
    Oh?
[06:07] Hiotan
    Hey, Umi-chan... What does BL stand for?
[06:11] Umio
    BL stands for "boys' love."
[06:16] Director
    Senpai, do you like those
    sorts of magazines?
[06:19] Hiotan
    N-No, that's not...
[06:21] Director
    Wow, I had no idea you liked BL.
[06:23] Hiotan
    I-I don't...
[06:24] Director
    Do you pair up your coworkers
    in your mind and stuff, too?
[06:28] Hiotan
    No, I...
SIGN    KamSom
[06:29] Director
    Like "KamSom"?
SIGN    KamSom
[06:31] Director
    Or would it be "SomKam"?
SIGN    SomKam
[06:32] Hiotan
    Director?!
[06:34] Director
    Oh, you noticed?
[06:34] Hiotan
    What are you doing?!
[06:36] Director
    With a boy and a girl alone in a room,
[06:38] Director
    putting seals on erotic books...
[06:41] Director
    There's no way something wouldn't happen.
[06:42] Umio
    What are you talking about?
[06:44] Director
    Thanks to that, I have a rich
    collection of funny Hiotan videos.
[06:47] Hiotan
    Don't collect those!
[06:52] Hiotan
    Hey, Umi-chan...
[06:54] Umio
    Yes?
[06:54] Hiotan
    Do you enjoy books like these?
[06:59] Hiotan
    Operation: Turn Director's
    Bullying Back On My Own Kouhai!
[07:03] Umio
    Yes, I do.
[07:04] Hiotan
    Huh?! Oh, y-you do?
[07:07] Hiotan
    What type do you like?
[07:09] Umio
    Well...
SIGN    Pleasure Paradise
[07:11] Umio
    I like this sort of thing, I guess.
[07:13] Hiotan
    Oh! I see!
[07:24] Umio
    Wh-Why did you ask me that?
[07:28] Hiotan
    Um...
[07:29] Hiotan
    J-Just for reference...
[07:32] Both
    Reference for what?!
[07:35] Umio
    S-Senpai, do you...
[07:37] Umio
    dislike erotic books?
[07:39] Hiotan
    Huh? No, not really.
[07:42] Umio
    Oh? So you like them?
[07:45] Hiotan
    Y-Yeah! So you and I are
    both ero book lovers!
[07:52] Both
    What's an ero book lover?!
[07:57] Director
    Hey, did something happen? C'mon, tell me!
[07:59] Umio
    No, nothing!
[08:02] Director
    That tastes like a lie.
SIGN    Comic
    Umanohone
[08:08] Kameko
    The Great Sommelier Party will now begin!
SIGN    Great Sommelier Party
[08:16] Umio
    Th-This is...
[08:18] Hiotan
    Yeah. This is the Great Sommelier
    Party, where Sommelier-san finds the
[08:22] ---
    manga best suited to everyone.
[08:23] Umio
    They're so enthusiastic...
[08:25] Hiotan
    Sommelier-san is really
    knowledgeable about manga.
[08:25] Kameko
    Line up in order, please!
[08:27] Hiotan
    That's why he's called "Sommelier."
[08:31] Girl
    Thanks for seeing me.
[08:38] Kameko
    Right, right. Got it!
[08:43] Kameko
    Here it is!
SIGN    Inazuma! Shorts Soccer
SIGN    This is the definitive shorts manga!
[08:45] Girl
    Shorts?
[08:47] Girl
    But I'm not into short pants or anyth—
[08:52] Girl
    I had no idea such a quality existed in me!
SIGN    JS!
    Battle on the South Seas
SIGN    My 70-Year-Old Sister
SIGN    I'm a Panda and You're a Deer
[09:03] Girl
    Thank you so much!
[09:04] Guy
    I have hope again!
[09:05] Guy
    I've seen a new world!
[09:07] Guy
    I'm glad I've lived this long!
[09:09] Umio
    A-Amazing... A manga sommelier...
[09:12] Umio
    He's the god of a new world!
[09:15] Umio
    That's...
[09:17] Umio
    The Ero Books G-man!
[09:20] Umio
    Is this an unannounced inspection
    in her street clothes?!
[09:27] Gman
    Please do it.
[09:36] Kameko
    What'll it be?
[09:37] Umio
    Please give her a harmless recommendation!
[09:41] Kameko
    Here you go!
SIGN    Garden of Otomen
[09:48] Umio
    And he's out!
[09:56] Umio
    There's no way he'll get
    off with just a scoldi—
[09:59] Umio
    She's smiling?!
[10:01] Gman
    Thank you!
[10:02] Umio
    And she thanked him?!
[10:04] Umio
    I see... She came here on her own time.
[10:07] Umio
    So she's not vilifying ero
    books because she hates them...
[10:12] Hiotan
    The government worker from before!
[10:15] Hiotan
    So you really are an ero book lover!
[10:19] Umio
    Wh-What are you—
[10:21] Hiotan
    I said something weird again...
[10:23] Hiotan
    I-It's okay! I'm...
[10:25] Hiotan
    an ero book lover, too!
[10:29] Gman
    Yes.
[10:31] Gman
    I am an ero book lover.
[10:34] Umio
    What is she confessing?!
[10:35] Gman
    But please understand this.
[10:38] Gman
    There is no human who doesn't need eros.
[10:40] Gman
    I,
[10:42] Gman
    and all of you, and all of mankind...
[10:46] Gman
    We are all ero book lovers!
[11:08] Guy
    That's right!
[11:08] Guy
    You got it!
[11:09] Girl
    Everyone loves ero books!
SIGN    Love & Eros For All
[11:25] Umio
    Good morning.
[11:27] Director
    You're late.
SIGN    The Nightmare Before Carnaval
[11:28] Umio
    No, I'm not.
[11:30] Umio
    I got here just in time. See?
[11:32] Director
    Okay, you're safe.
[11:35] Umio
    Sensei-san, did you not sleep well?
[11:37] Sensei
    Well, sort of...
[11:40] Umio
    Oh, that's the new volume
    from the Soba Curry Circle!
[11:44] Umio
    It was released during
    that event last month.
[11:46] Director
    You know about this, Umio?
[11:48] Umio
    Yes! I like Jonataro, so I look
    up his stuff online all the time.
[11:53] Umio
    He's very good, isn't he?
[11:55] Umio
    I've bought some doujinshi, too.
    They're all interesting.
[11:58] Director
    Yeah?
[11:59] Umio
    And he's so young!
[12:01] Umio
    It's amazing that he can both
    draw and write so well!
[12:03] Director
    I see, I see...
[12:04] Director
    Hear that, Sensei?
[12:07] Director
    Sensei is Jonataro-san.
[12:09] Umio
    What?!
[12:10] Umio
    You are? I thought the author was a guy!
[12:14] Sensei
    Thank you...
[12:15] Umio
    I get it... That's why she's called Sensei!
[12:17] Director
    No, that's not the only reason.
SIGN    Sensei-chan on Her First Day
[12:19] Director
    When she introduced herself
    on her first day here...
[12:22] (Flashback) Sensei
    I'm going to become a pro author and
    surpass Yagamigawa Senchiro-sensei!
[12:27] Director
    She's been Sensei ever since.
[12:28] Sensei
    Stop it, Director!
[12:29] Director
    Oh, sorry about that.
[12:31] Sensei
    I swear...
[12:33] Umio
    Are you okay?
[12:34] Sensei
    Yeah... My deadline is close, so...
[12:37] Umio
    Deadline?
[12:38] Sensei
    For that. ComiCa.
SIGN    Comic Carnaval Catalog
[12:40] Umio
    The deadline's already that close?
[12:42] Sensei
    Deadlines are early for large-scale events.
SIGN    Thanks for Waiting!
    Space Bento 1
[12:48] Sensei
    What is this?!
[12:49] Umio
    I-I drew it! I'm not as good as you—
[12:52] Sensei
    Umio-kun, you can draw?!
[12:54] Umio
    Y-Yes, sort of...
[12:55] Sensei
    Do you use maru-pens?!
[12:56] Umio
    Uh, I use milli-pens...
[12:58] Sensei
    What about SAI? Photoshop? Clip Studio?!
[13:00] Umio
    Well, yeah...
[13:01] Sensei
    Th-That settles it!
[13:04] Sensei
    Come to my place after work today.
[13:06] Umio
    Huh?
[13:08] Director
    Sensei, you're so forward.
[13:10] Kameko
    Sensei's a wolf!
[13:12] Sensei
    Oh, I don't mean it like that.
[13:14] Sensei
    I want him to help with my manuscript.
[13:15] Hiotan
    Yes! I'll be helping her, too!
[13:19] Director
    Oh? But Umio-kun says he
    likes Jonataro-sensei.
[13:23] Umio
    I like her art! Her work!
[13:30] Umio
    When is the deadline for your manuscript?
[13:35] Sensei
    Tomorrow.
[13:36] Umio
    Tomorrow?!
[13:36] Sensei
    Ten in the morning.
[13:38] Hiotan
    Ten in the morning?!
[13:39] Sensei
    It was supposed to be today,
[13:41] Sensei
    but I begged the printers for an extension.
[13:44] Sensei
    So... please!
[13:46] Umio
    You don't...
[13:49] Hiotan
    Oh, my.
[13:51] Umio
    You don't have to be so formal.
    If I can be of use...
[13:54] Sensei
    You're a big help.
[13:58] Umio
    Wow...
[14:00] Umio
    I didn't know you lived near the
    station just one stop from mine.
SIGN    Ichikawa
SIGN    Koiwa
[14:04] Sensei
    Oh, really? I'm glad you live close.
SIGN    Takaido
[14:07] Hiotan
    I live in Takaido, so it's
    a little farther away.
SIGN    Takaido Ichikawa Koiwa
[14:10] Sensei
    Sorry, Hiotan.
[14:12] Hiotan
    Oh, I didn't mean it that way!
[14:17] Sensei
    Where's Takaido, again?
SIGN    °It's on the Inokashira Line.
[14:18] Umio
    Where's Takaido, again?
[14:20] Sensei
    Key, key...
[14:22] Sensei
    There it is.
[14:24] Sensei
    Sorry it's so small.
[14:25] Umio
    No problem.
[14:26] Hiotan
    Thanks for having us!
[14:39] Hiotan
    Is this right?
[14:41] Sensei
    Yeah.
[14:42] Hiotan
    'Kay.
[14:43] Sensei
    Add the backgrounds on this, please.
[14:45] Umio
    Okay.
[14:48] Umio
    So this is a real manuscript...
[14:51] Umio
    It really is different
    from the printed release.
[14:55] Umio
    It has such impact...
[14:58] Umio
    Sensei-san really is aiming to be a pro.
[15:02] Umio
    She's exhausted from lack of
    sleep, but she never complains.
[15:12] Sensei
    I can't take any more!
    I'm tired! I want sleep!
[15:16] Sensei
    I can't draw anymore!
[15:18] Hiotan
    Her baby side came out again!
[15:20] Umio
    I take it all back.
[15:23] Hiotan
    She always gets like this
    when she's worn out.
[15:26] Umio
    What do we do now?
[15:28] Hiotan
    Don't worry!
[15:31] Hiotan
    What's wrong, Sensei-chan?
[15:34] Hiotan
    C'mon, come over here.
[15:40] Hiotan
    There, there.
[15:42] Hiotan
    You like resting on people's laps, huh?
[15:47] Umio
    That motherly aura...
[15:49] Umio
    You're used to dealing with
    Sensei-san, aren't you?
[15:52] Hiotan
    I've been helping her for a while.
[15:55] Hiotan
    She taught me how to finish up a manga.
[16:01] Hiotan
    There! She's back.
[16:04] Sensei
    I'll draw my manga.
[16:05] Hiotan
    Good girl!
[16:07] Sensei
    It's almost time for the
    last train, so you can go.
[16:10] Umio
    Are you sure?
[16:12] Sensei
    Yeah. I can do the rest by myself.
[16:19] Hiotan
    What's up, Umi-chan?
    The train's gonna leave.
[16:22] Umio
    Uh, it looks like I left
    my phone at Sensei's.
[16:25] Hiotan
    What?
[16:26] Umio
    But I can walk home, so you can go ahead.
[16:29] Hiotan
    Okay... See you tomorrow, then.
[16:32] Umio
    Good work today.
[16:41] Sensei
    Hello? Umio-kun?
[16:43] Umio
    Sensei, don't you think you
    might not make the deadline?
[16:48] Sensei
    That's a rude thing to say.
[16:50] Umio
    Oh, I'm sorry... I mean...
[16:53] Umio
    So, I'll help you some more.
[16:56] Sensei
    What? I couldn't trouble you to...
[16:59] Umio
    It's okay! I'm used to staying up late!
[17:01] Umio
    Besides, I...
[17:08] Umio
    Sensei-san...
[17:11] Umio
    I love Jonataro-san's manga!
[17:17] Sensei
    Umio-kun...
[17:20] Umio
    You're going to become a pro
    manga artist and surpass
[17:24] ---
    Yagamigawa Senchiro-sensei, aren't you?
[17:26] Umio
    Ah, sorry to just burst in...
[17:28] Sensei
    Oh, no... I'm sorry you had
    to see me like this...
[17:33] Umio
    You looked worse earlier, actually.
[17:37] Sensei
    That's right. I'm going to be a
    pro manga artist, no matter what.
[17:41] Sensei
    This will take until morning. Is that okay?
[17:43] Umio
    Yes!
[17:44] Sensei
    Thanks. Sorry I worried you.
[17:47] Sensei
    I'm okay now!
[17:49] Sensei
    I can't take any more!
[17:51] Sensei
    I can't draw! This will never end!
[17:53] Umio
    She's not okay at all!
[17:55] Umio
    I know! How about a change of pace?
[17:57] Umio
    Are you hungry?
[17:59] Sensei
    Yes...
[18:00] Umio
    Then I'll go buy something!
[18:02] Sensei
    No, I'll do that.
[18:04] Umio
    You can't. You need to keep drawing.
[18:06] Sensei
    But I couldn't ask you to—
[18:08] Umio
    You can't!
[18:09] Umio
    You're a girl, Sensei-san.
[18:11] Umio
    It's dangerous for you to
    be out alone at this hour.
[18:15] Umio
    I'll be back soon.
[18:21] Sensei
    What the heck...
[18:24] Sensei
    Don't treat me like a
    girl all of a sudden...
[18:31] Sensei
    Okay!
SIGN    Sending Please Wait
SIGN    Sent
[19:01] Sensei
    There!
[19:07] Both
    We're done!
[19:10] Sensei
    We made it...
[19:13] Umio
    Sensei...
[19:14] Umio
    If you're going to sleep,
    lay out a futon first.
[19:28] Umio
    Great work.
[19:57] Umio
    You did it!
[19:59] Sensei
    Here. For you.
[20:01] Umio
    Thank you.
[20:03] Sensei
    Thank you for helping me.
[20:04] Sensei
    It came out great thanks to you.
[20:06] Umio
    No, I'm glad I could help
    my favorite author.
[20:12] Sensei
    Umi-kun...
[20:13] Girl
    Excuse me...
[20:15] Girl
    I'm in the booth next to yours. I look
    forward to working alongside you.
[20:19] Sensei
    Thanks, and same to you.
[20:20] Girl
    Sure!
[20:21] Voice
    Comic Carnaval 536 is now open.
SIGN    Women's Restroom
SIGN    Not the end of the line!
[20:47] Kameko
    Yeah, baby!
[20:48] Kameko
    You both look great! Nice!
[21:09] Sensei
    Whew, it's over.
[21:12] Kameko
    I got lots of great pictures!
[21:15] Umio
    Sensei-san, good work today.
[21:17] Sensei
    Thanks.
[21:18] Sensei
    I couldn't sell out today, again...
[21:21] Hiotan
    Let's cosplay again sometime.
[21:23] Fugirl
    Okay.
[21:24] Director
    Hey!
[21:26] Director
    Good work, everyone!
[21:27] Umio
    You were here, too?
[21:29] Director
    Well, since we're all here,
    why don't we go all-out?
[21:32] All
    Oh! An after-party?!
[21:35] Sensei
    All-out!
[21:36] Director
    All-out.
[21:41] Sensei
    Um, weren't we having an after-party?
[21:43] Director
    Well, since ComiCa just ended,
[21:45] ---
    we've got tons of new doujin
    volumes and stuff...
[21:47] Director
    Have all of these shrink-wrapped by tomorrow.
[21:51] Director
    By the way, there'll be
    another two days of this.
[21:54] Umio
    What... the...
[21:56] Sensei
    Umi-kun!
[21:57] Hiotan
    Umi-chan!
[21:58] Fugirl
    Umio-kun!
[21:59] Umio
    And after that, we did a whole
    lot of shrink-wrapping...
[23:37] Hiotan
    You know, Denki-gai grew really
    big during Japan's rapid
[23:37] [SONG] TextL
    Manager
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
[23:40] ---
    economic growth period.
SIGN    Please watch again next time!
[23:42] Hiotan
    What's a "rapid economic growth period"?
[23:45] Hiotan
    Is it like an electric cord?
SIGN    Illustration: Tiv
SIGN    The Devil is an Idol!
SIGN    Uma-kun's Recommendation!
SIGN    The grown-up light novel that left readers hanging for three years right at the climax is finally complete! Even buying three copies for reading, distribution, and safekeeping wouldn't be enough! A true fan should buy ten copies of this masterpiece! You might say it's a god, whinny!!!
SIGN    Appearing next week?! Watch again!

2 - Is Denki-gai Burning?

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Kantoku
    All right, we're starting the late night sale.
[00:06] All
    Okay.
[00:08] Hio
    I know it's the last volume
    of a popular light novel,
[00:11] ---
    but is it really worth
    changing our store hours for?
SIGN    The Devil Is an Idol
SIGN    It's been three years since the last volume, hasn't it?
[00:18] Umio
    How could you say that?
[00:19] Umio
    We've been left waiting for three years
[00:21] ---
    since they announced the final volume.
[00:22] Umio
    We waited three years right at the climax!
[00:26] Hio
    Umi-chan?
[00:26] Hio
    The author cried blood, sweat and tears into this
[00:29] ---
    weathering the storm of speculations
    and criticism online,
[00:32] ---
    and finally after three years,
    this is the work of their soul!
[00:34] ---
    Umi-chan?
[00:37] Kantoku
    Is he a zealot?
[00:38] A
    He's a zealot.
[00:38] A
    Indeed, a zealot.
[02:12] Fu
    So many people.
[02:14] Fu
    I hope I'll make the last train.
[02:17] Kantoku
    We're open for business!
[02:23] Kameko
    The special edition is 1,200 yen!
[02:26] Hio
    Thank you!
[02:28] Sensei
    I can take the next customer here.
[02:31] Hio
    Please make four lines.
[02:33] Kantoku
    Umio, inventory!
[02:34] Umio
    Twelve more seconds!
[02:35] Kantoku
    Do it in seven!
[02:36] Sensei
    I'm out of change!
[02:38] Kantoku
    Use this!
[02:39] Kantoku
    Register four, you're late!
[02:40] Kameko
    Sorry.
[02:42] Kantoku
    What's going on?
[02:43] Hio
    Please help us work, Director.
[02:45] Kantoku
    I'm sure I can at least watch over you.
[02:49] Hio
    Don't just watch over us, move your hands!
[02:55] Kantoku
    Store's closed.
[02:57] Umio
    Those two hours were a storm.
[03:00] Hio
    That was seriously crazy.
[03:02] Sensei
    The customers, they wouldn't stop.
[03:05] Sensei
    I'm a total big-shot.
[03:07] Kantoku
    All right, you can all head home.
[03:09] Kantoku
    I'll clean up.
[03:12] Hio
    Is that why you were saving your energy?
[03:14] Kantoku
    Sure.
[03:15] Hio
    Yeah, right.
[03:17] Hio
    But the time... what should I do?
[03:20] Hio
    Fuga-chan came shopping,
    but she can't get home now either.
[03:23] Fu-girl
    I was trying to be first in line
     and then head home.
[03:27] Sensei
    How about—
[03:29] All
    Drink bar, cheers!
[03:31] Hio
    Good work, everyone.
[03:33] Sensei
    Let's have something to eat.
[03:35] Hio
    You really like family
    restaurants, Sensei-chan.
[03:38] Sensei
    Yeah, they're relaxing.
    It's like being at home.
[03:42] Sensei
    And you can hang out at the
    drink bar for pretty long.
[03:44] Hio
    Oh, do you draw manga at
    family restaurants, too?
[03:47] Sensei
    Yeah, I can be pretty productive.
[03:56] Hio
    Fuga-chan, are you beat?
[03:59] Hio
    You should go sleep in the nap room at Uma.
[04:02] Umio
    I'll take her—
[04:06] Hio
    Sommelier-kun, are you going
    to take her there for us?
[04:09] Sommelier
    Yeah.
[04:10] Hio
    Thanks.
[05:07] Fu-girl
    Umio-kun.
[05:18] Kantoku
    Done, finally.
[05:21] Kantoku
    Sommelier.
[05:22] Kantoku
    Is Fu Girl sleeping?
[05:24] Sommelier
    Yeah.
[05:25] Kantoku
    Ah.
[05:27] Kantoku
    Is everyone at the family restaurant?
[05:29] Kantoku
    You should go be with them,
    if Fu Girl is asleep.
[05:32] Kantoku
    No way, you weren't waiting for me, were you?
[05:54] Kantoku
    Want a drink?
[05:58] Kantoku
    All right, you're not sleeping tonight.
[06:02] Hio
    We brought some snacks.
[06:06] Hio
    Director's sleeping!
[06:11] Hio
    I can finally get him
    back for all his pranks.
[06:14] Umio
    Don't go too far.
[06:16] Hio
    S-S-Sommelier-kun, l-l-let me go!
[06:20] Hio
    Sommelier-san
[06:22] ---
    defended Director.
[06:36] Umio
    Fu Girl-san.
[06:37] Fu-girl
    Shh, you'll wake them up.
[06:40] Umio
    R-Right...
[06:43] Fu-girl
    Ever since we first met, I've been thinking.
[06:48] Fu-girl
    Umio-kun, you're my perfect—
[06:54] Fu-girl
    My perfect zombie.
[06:56] Umio
    What?
[06:59] Umio
    I'm in zombie makeup!
[07:02] Fu-girl
    You look so good.
[07:04] Fu-girl
    I love zombies.
[07:06] ---
    All I ever do is think about the
    town being filled with zombies.
SIGN    This'll last me ten days
[07:10] Fu-girl
    I've been image training for how to respond.
SIGN    Do they respond to sound? Or smell?
SIGN    I want a chainsaw,
    but they're expensive.
SIGN    Fu Girl
[07:13] Umio
    That's why you're Fu Girl!
[07:14] Fu-girl
    You have the face of the best
    friend guy who helps his friends
[07:18] ---
    and becomes a zombie and gets
    killed by his friends in the end.
[07:22] Umio
    What kind of face is that?!
[07:26] Umio
    Like Roger from Romero's Dawn of the Dead.
[07:29] Fu-girl
    So please—
[07:32] Fu-girl
    will you be my practice target
    for the zombie attack?
[07:36] Fu-girl
    Dodging zombies... this is new!
[07:39] Umio
    I'm not a zombie!
[07:43] Sensei
    Fuga-chan's gone beast mode.
[07:45] Hio
    What's beast mode?
[07:47] Kantoku
    This is good footage!
SIGN    Is the Denki-gai pumped?
[08:15] Hio
    Denki-gai late-summer greetings festival?
[08:18] Hio
    I'm so embarrassed.
[08:20] Umio
    Fu Girl-san's been really
    pumped since yesterday.
[08:25] Hio
    That's unusual.
[08:27] Umio
    She says she wants to win the
    10,000 yen prize money and party.
[08:33] Hio
    Party?!
[08:34] Sensei
    Prize money.
[08:35] Fu-girl
    Y-You bastards, you're late!
[08:38] Fu-girl
    Who were you nyan-nyan-ing with, you bitches!
[08:42] Hio
    What's wrong with you, Fuga-chan?
[08:44] Hio
    Do you have a fever?
[08:46] Fu-girl
    How dare you insult the commander!
[08:48] Fu-girl
    Speak only when you're spoken to!
[08:50] Kameko
    Perfect!
[08:51] Kantoku
    She says she's changing her
    tone to get in the mood.
[08:53] SSD
    Hi, everyone!
[08:55] ---
    Are you readilicon?!
[08:58] Umio
    That's the Denki-gai official
    character, SSDko-chan!
[09:01] SSD
    All right, let's start the Denki-gai
    Late-Summer Greetings Festilicon!
[09:06] SSD
    All store teams, go get
    that 10,000 grand prize!
[09:10] SSD
    And the extra prize?
SIGN    Extra Prize
[09:12] SSD
    A year's supply of Denki-gai
    specialty hot summer oden!
SIGN    Pantsu Eating Race
[09:24] Hio
    Go, Sommelier-kun!
[09:26] Fu-girl
    I'm punishing you if you lose!
[09:38] Fu-girl
    Pantsu race!
[09:40] SSD
    Sommelier of Umanohone
    team wins the pantsu race!
[09:43] Umio
    Yeah!
[09:45] Kameko
    That's a good face!
[09:46] Hio
    Good work, Sommelier-kun!
[09:48] Fu-girl
    I approve! You can come to
    my house and pet my brother.
[09:52] Fu-girl
    You want three? You want
    three panties? You pig!
[09:56] Kantoku
    This is a good start.
[09:57] Fu-girl
    Let's win and go party!
SIGN    etc.
SIGN    Used doujin shop
     Hanamaru
SIGN    Model shop
    Tomiya
SIGN    etc
[10:00] A
    Those Umanohone punks.
[10:02] B
    Cocky little...
[10:04] Fu-girl
    All right, you're up, Hio-tan, go!
[10:07] Hio
    Yes, sir, I'll do my best.
[10:09] SSD
    And now, the girls-only Golden Ball Roll!
[10:13] Hio
    Gieppi! Why are all the games like this?
[10:16] Kantoku
    It's in the culture.
[10:18] Kantoku
    We're good at rolling balls, aren't we?
[10:20] Hio
    What's with the hand motion?
[10:22] ---
    Stop it with the sexual harassment, Director!
[10:24] SSD
    Are you in posilicon?
[10:28] Kantoku
    Put your hands on the ball!
[10:30] Kantoku
    Your left hand just touches it.
[10:32] Hio
    Why do you have to say it like that?!
[10:36] Hio
    It's kind of soft.
[10:37] SSD
    Startilicon!
[10:40] Hio
    And it's lukewarm!
[10:43] SSD
    The golden balls are rolling!
[10:45] SSD
    The girls' hesitant touch
    grips the imagination!
[10:49] Hio
    It's so hard to roll,
    why is it slightly egg-shaped?
[10:53] Kantoku
    It's realistic, right?
[10:55] A
    Oh, pardon me.
[10:56] A
    Our two balls touched. I lost balance.
[10:59] Hio
    Your sexual harassment is as bad as Director!
[11:01] A
    Balance. Ballanace. Yes, ballance.
[11:04] Hio
    Ballance?!
[11:05] A
    My ball hit your ball.
[11:06] Hio
    Balls?!
[11:07] Hio
    Balls, balls, balls, balls...
[11:13] SSD
    Hio-tan has been run over
    by a golden ballicon!
[11:17] SSD
    Goalicon!
[11:20] Kantoku
    Hio-tan!
[11:21] Umio
    Are you all right?
[11:22] Kameko
    Hang in there!
[11:25] Hio
    I can't marry anymore.
[11:26] Hio
    This is awful.
[11:28] Kantoku
    Vile... they'll pay!
[11:30] Umio
    I'll avenge you, Senpai!
[11:32] Fu-girl
    Go, Umio!
SIGN    Wife-Carrying Race
[11:34] SSD
    Up next is the Wife-Carrying Raceilicon!
[11:37] Kantoku
    Have you chosen a wife?
[11:39] Umio
    Of course.
[11:41] Umio
    My wife is
[11:43] ---
    Onomi-chan!
[11:50] SSD
    Startilicon!
[11:55] SSD
    Oh, Umio has taken a strong check!
[11:58] SSD
    He's not budging!
[12:02] Umio
    My love for my wife will never falter!
[12:05] SSD
    And his big speech!
[12:06] A
    I'm not so sure.
[12:08] Umio
    What?
[12:09] A
    Behold!
[12:11] SSD
    It's this season's top character,
    Tanegashima Zavier-chanilicon!
[12:17] SSD
    That's a rare one; there are no 3D goods
    on sale for this brand-new characterilicon!
[12:22] Umio
    It's so high quality!
[12:25] SSD
    Umio is waverilicon!
[12:39] A
    Whoops, sorry.
[12:41] SSD
    Umio is disqualicon!
[12:47] A
    How unfaithful of you to be
    attracted to another character.
[12:51] A
    A true man calmly abandons his
    prior wife to welcome his new one.
[12:57] A
    He only ever has but one wife.
[13:03] Umio
    I'm defeated.
[13:03] ---
    Umio!
[13:05] Fu-girl
    How dare he treat model figures
    as anything less than human!
[13:09] SSD
    Up next is a team game: Tunaf-war!
SIGN    Tunaf-war
[13:14] Kantoku
    We need five for tug-of-war.
[13:16] Kantoku
    Hio-tan and Umio are incapacitated.
[13:19] Kantoku
    Then, Kameko, you're up, too!
[13:22] ---
    Er, I'm not that kind of character...
[13:25] Fu-girl
    Hurry up and change!
[13:26] Fu-girl
    You're good at undressing,
    aren't you, you bitch?!
[13:30] Kame
    This is embarrassing.
[13:32] Kantoku
    No, it looks good on you.
[13:34] Kame
    Please don't record me.
[13:39] SSD
    Tunaf-war, start!
[13:46] SSD
    They're almost evenly matchilicon!
[13:50] Kame
    I'm going to do everything I can.
[13:53] A
    All right, do the thing!
[13:55] B
    Sir!
[13:57] B
    Kameko-kun, Kameko-kun.
[14:01] Kame
    It's the fabled Carl Zyeiss joint-developed
    lens SMC-TENTAX 18mm F3.5,
[14:07] ---
    and at an insanely low price!
[14:10] A
    Oh? That's a nice lens. Can I see?
[14:14] Kame
    Another buyer!
[14:15] Kame
    I'm buying it!
[14:16] Kantoku
    No, Kameko! It's a trap!
[14:20] Kame
    Please.
[14:21] C
    Thank you.
[14:22] ---
    Yes!
SIGN    Lens-shaped cup
[14:30] Kantoku
    Kameko!
[14:32] SSD
    Umanohone is defeatilicon!
[14:36] Kantoku
    Kameko! Kameko!
[14:38] Kantoku
    Get a grip!
[14:42] Kantoku
    Kameko!
[14:43] Fu-girl
    How dare you!
[14:46] Fu-girl
    We're going to win!
[14:48] SD
    It's your idol, SDko-chan.
[14:51] SD
    We're at the climaXC!
SIGN    Denki-gai Late-Summer Greetings Festival
[14:53] A
    Woo!
[14:53] B
    Where's SSDko-chan?!
[14:56] C
    It's the same voice!
[14:58] Umio
    Oh well.
SIGN    Refreshing Water Fight
[15:00] SD
    Finally, we have the refreshing Water FiXC!
[15:04] SD
    First, you will form teams of three or less.
[15:08] SD
    One will be the Flag. The team
    loses when the Flag is soaXC!
[15:14] SD
    And regardless of the games
    before, the last team standing
[15:17] ---
    at the end of this game is victoriouXC!
[15:22] Fu-girl
    Typical!
[15:24] Fu-girl
    All right, we're going to win!
[15:33] Sensei
    What? Swimsuits?
[15:35] Sensei
    Now way I'm wearing a swimsuit!
    That's embarrassing!
[15:37] Umio
    Sensei!
[15:39] Fu-girl
    C-Coward!
[15:40] Fu-girl
    Did you leave your balls somewhere?
[15:43] Fu-girl
    In that case...
[15:48] Fu-girl
    All right, do you all have your weapons?
[15:50] Umio
    Yes!
[15:51] Fu-girl
    Say "sir"!
[15:52] Umio
    Sir, yes sir!
[15:54] SD
    Are you readyXC?
[15:57] SD
    Set,
[16:00] ---
    goXC!
[16:14] Umio
    Fu Girl-san's good.
[16:15] Fu-girl
    Pretend they're all zombies!
[16:25] Hio
    Let's do this, then.
[16:29] Hio
    Wait, Director, what's up with your swimsuit?
[16:32] Kantoku
    It's easy to move in.
[16:34] Hio
    It's too bulgy!
[16:38] Kantoku
    Isn't that the same for girls' breasts, too?
[16:41] Kantoku
    Two, no less!
[16:42] Kantoku
    How is it any different?
[16:44] Hio
    True...
[16:46] Kantoku
    Breasts and crotches are both symbols of sex.
[16:49] Kantoku
    What is there to be ashamed of?
[16:50] Hio
    I'm sorry.
[16:52] Kantoku
    Look, enemies inbound!
[17:03] Kantoku
    Keep it up, Hio-tan!
[17:05] Kantoku
    Hio-tan is easy to manage.
[17:06] Umio
    Senpai.
[17:08] Hio
    Umi-chan.
[17:08] Umio
    Can I have some water balloons?
[17:15] Umio
    What was that for?
[17:16] Hio
    I didn't mean to.
[17:18] Umio
    Senpai!
[17:21] Hio
    I'm surrounded!
[17:22] Hio
    Director, Kame-chan, help me!
[17:25] Kantoku
    I'll pass, I don't want my camera to get wet.
[17:27] Kame
    Me, neither. I have a perfect shot.
[17:44] Kantoku
    That's a good face: the face of shame
    and of being betrayed by friends!
[17:48] Kame
    I'm getting some good pictures!
SIGN    Hio-tan team drops out
[17:51] Kame
    Yeah, that's the stuff!
[17:54] Fu-girl
    My comrades are down.
SIGN    Fu Girl Team
[17:56] Fu-girl
    But there's no time to
    grieve on the battlefield.
[18:02] Fu-girl
    Aim for the nose for the non-flags!
[18:04] Fu-girl
    Incapacitate them!
[18:05] Umio
    Is she a demon?
[18:07] A
    Yo, that team's good.
[18:09] B
    We better team up for now.
[18:17] Fu-girl
    All those weaklings. Our move then...
[18:19] Fu-girl
    Umio-kun,
[18:21] ---
    use these guns!
[18:24] Umio
    Okay.
[18:31] C
    What the hell?!
[18:32] Fu-girl
    Blood guns. They make their
    targets look zombie-ish.
[18:35] Umio
    That's freaky!
[18:38] Umio
    Kill them with me!
[18:42] Fu-girl
    Goodbye, Roger!
[18:51] Fu-girl
    Umio-kun, I'll take your bones!
[18:53] Fu-girl
    On the way home or something.
[18:57] Fu-girl
    Damn, there's no end to them.
[18:58] Fu-girl
    All right, Sommelier-kun,
[19:03] ---
    c-combine!
[19:14] Fu-girl
    Combine! Sommelier Tank!
[19:17] D
    Fire!
[19:36] Fu-girl
    Good, there aren't many teams left.
[19:38] Fu-girl
    Now we just have to avoid them.
[19:42] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun.
[19:47] Fu-girl
    What?
[19:48] Fu-girl
    You idiot, I haven't sent a combine command!
[19:57] E
    Damn, fire hydrants are the best.
[20:01] Fu-girl
    They're cowards!
[20:03] Fu-girl
    Okay, Sommelier, let's surrender.
[20:05] Fu-girl
    Sommelier!
[20:07] Fu-girl
    Sommelier!
[20:14] Fu-girl
    Sommelier.
[20:17] F
    Strip him all the way!
[20:26] Fu-girl
    Sensei!
[20:27] Fu-girl
    Thank you. You were in the game?
[20:34] Fu-girl
    Sensei, stop!
[20:40] Sensei
    Good, the prize money is mine now.
[20:43] SD
    The winner is Sensei's solo team XC!
[20:49] Kantoku
    So much for having three per team.
[20:53] Umio
    What the hell.
[20:56] Umio
    Fu Girl-san, what are you
    cosplaying as anyway?
[21:00] Fu-girl
    I'm not cosplaying.
[21:02] Fu-girl
    I'm using it at school.
[21:03] Umio
    Oh, yeah?
[21:05] Umio
    Wait, how old are you, Fu Girl-san?
[21:08] Fu-girl
    S-Sixteen.
[21:17] Umio
    Of course!
[21:18] Umio
    I knew you were younger than me.
[21:20] Fu-girl
    People always think I'm in elementary,
    but I'm in my first year of high school.
SIGN    Oden
[21:38] Fu-girl
    Good work.
[21:49] Fu-girl
    Sorry we lost after all that.
[21:54] Fu-girl
    But it was fun.
[22:00] Sommelier
    Let's combine again.
[22:05] ---
    Sure.
SIGN    Manager
SIGN    Thank you for watching!
SIGN    Just relax. Is this your first time? It's okay, it's not scary.
SIGN    Please watch again next time!
[23:41] Fu-girl
    I'm just going to hit you with a bat.
[23:43] Fu-girl
    Don't worry!
    I'm just going to kill the zombies.
SIGN    Illustration: Hashimoto Shin
SIGN    See you again!
[23:50] ---
    

3 - Hio-tan, Go Home / Endless Carnival

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] All
    Yes!
[00:00] All
    Yes!
[01:36] Hio
    You're so cute, Fuga-chan.
[01:39] Fu-girl
    You're cute, too, Hio-tan.
[01:42] Kantoku
    Are you good with that costume, Hio-tan?
[01:46] Hio
    I like it.
[01:48] Hio
    Are we having a normal work
    day today, wearing this?
[01:50] Kantoku
    No, you'll be selling something
    that's perfect for Christmas.
[01:54] Hio
    Something perfect for Christmas?
SIGN    On Sale Today!
[02:05] Hio
    It's freezing!
[02:10] Fu-girl
    Here.
[02:11] Fu-girl
    Here.
[02:13] Fu-girl
    Here.
[02:13] Kantoku
    Hey,
[02:15] ---
    are you working hard?
[02:16] Hio
    Director, it's cold as hell.
[02:20] Kantoku
    You said you liked that one.
SIGN    One layer of tights
[02:23] Hio
    You never told me we would be outside.
SIGN    Full armor
[02:26] Hio
    And you said it's something perfect
    for Christmas. It's an eroge!
SIGN    On sale December 25th!
    The wait is over!
[02:31] Hio
    What part of this is perfect for Christmas?
[02:32] Kantoku
    You're very observant.
    Close, but not quite.
[02:35] Kantoku
    This is a console port.
    There's no adult stuff.
[02:38] Hio
    It's still not Christmas-ey at all.
[02:44] Kantoku
    Hio-tan,
[02:46] ---
    you seem to study well, but you
    don't understand the basics at all.
[02:52] Hio
    I think I understand these days.
[02:54] Kantoku
    Then describe this piece.
[02:57] Hio
    It's a sequel to the super-popular
[02:59] ---
    bishoujo game that went on sale a year ago.
[03:01] Kantoku
    Right.
[03:02] Kantoku
    Then why do you not understand
    the significance of "a year ago?"
[03:08] Hio
    Significance of "a year ago?"
[03:11] Kantoku
    It means that for the people
    who've been waiting for this,
[03:17] ---
    it's the first time in a year that
    they're meeting their lovers.
[03:21] Hio
    S-Say what?!
[03:24] Kantoku
    Look at the customers.
[03:28] Kantoku
    Those people, those eyes...
    they're in love.
[03:33] Kantoku
    The days they spent apart
    are long and painful.
[03:37] Kantoku
    They fought with the fear that
    they may never meet again.
[03:52] Onomi
    Merry Christmas!
[03:55] Kantoku
    And they spend the Holy Night together.
[03:59] Kantoku
    Could anything be more romantic?
[04:01] Hio
    No, there couldn't.
[04:05] Hio
    I'm sorry.
[04:07] Hio
    Director, I was overconfident of my knowledge.
[04:17] Kantoku
    It's all right.
[04:19] Kantoku
    You'll learn over time.
[04:22] Hio
    D-Director.
[04:25] Hio
    Yes. I'll do my best.
[04:28] Kantoku
    Yeah, do it.
[04:30] Kantoku
    Man, you're so easy to use.
[04:33] Hio
    I knew it! You were joking!
[04:37] Kantoku
    Work hard!
[04:40] Hio
    It's so cold.
[04:42] Fu-girl
    Hio-tan, it's almost time
    to switch. Don't give up.
[04:46] Hio
    Fuga-chan.
[04:49] Hio
    Isn't that backwards?
[04:58] Hio
    I'm so tired.
[05:02] Kantoku
    Good work.
[05:03] Kantoku
    This is on me.
[05:05] Hio
    Wow, thank you.
[05:07] Hio
    That was terrible, thanks to you.
[05:11] Kantoku
    My bad.
[05:13] Kantoku
    Oh, yeah,
[05:15] ---
    do you have a boyfriend?
[05:19] Hio
    I-I d-don't, but—
[05:23] Kantoku
    Oh, good.
[05:25] Kantoku
    Let's go out, then.
[05:31] Kantoku
    Out shopping.
[05:33] Hio
    You meant "go out shopping"?!
[05:40] Hio
    Spacious!
[05:41] Hio
    Huge!
[05:43] Hio
    Cutting edge!
[05:45] Hio
    Your room's awesome.
[05:47] Kantoku
    Relax.
[05:48] Hio
    And your bed's so fancy!
[05:50] Kantoku
    I said, "relax."
[05:54] Kantoku
    Come on, put your stuff down first.
[05:57] Kantoku
    Don't forget what you came here for.
[05:59] Hio
    What?
[06:02] Hio
    What was it, again?
[06:03] Kantoku
    I'll kick you out.
[06:10] Kantoku
    Hio-tan, can you get the tape?
[06:12] Hio
    Okay.
[06:15] Hio
    Do you have a Christmas party every year?
[06:18] Kantoku
    Yeah, at my place.
[06:20] Kantoku
    All of us lonely people with nothing
    to do on Christmas get together.
[06:23] Hio
    H-How rude.
[06:25] Kantoku
    Oh? Did you have plans?
[06:27] Hio
    No, I didn't.
[06:30] Kantoku
    All right, now it's just the windows.
[06:32] Hio
    You do the windows, too?
[06:34] Hio
    You go all out.
[06:36] Kantoku
    There was someone until last year
    that liked doing these things.
[06:39] Hio
    Oh, yeah?
[06:41] Hio
    Should I help with something, then?
[06:43] Kantoku
    Can you cut those out?
[06:45] Hio
    Okay.
[06:50] Kantoku
    Be careful.
[06:51] Hio
    I'll be fi—
[06:53] ---
    Ow!
[06:54] Kantoku
    Already?!
[06:56] Hio
    Ow, I cut pretty deep.
[06:59] Kantoku
    Don't just stare at it. Here.
[07:13] Kantoku
    And then...
[07:15] Kantoku
    Band-aids that heal you three times faster.
[07:18] Hio
    Three times?
[07:18] Kantoku
    Yeah, three times normal.
[07:23] Kantoku
    There you go.
[07:24] Hio
    Thank you.
[07:31] Hio
    You have a good side, too, Director.
[07:37] Kantoku
    How rude! I'm all good.
[07:40] Hio
    You're always mean to me.
[07:43] Kantoku
    Just relax.
[07:45] Kantoku
    I'll do the rest.
[07:46] Hio
    Okay.
[08:04] Kantoku
    All right, I think that does it.
[08:07] Hio
    Director, Director!
[08:10] Hio
    Ta-da!
[08:13] Kantoku
    What's this?
[08:15] Hio
    I found some paper, so I made it.
[08:17] Kantoku
    Okay, let's use it.
[08:18] Hio
    And tissue flowers.
[08:22] Kantoku
    Oh, yeah. We used to make those for the
    sports festival in elementary school.
[08:27] Hio
    I know, right?
[08:28] Kantoku
    Okay.
[08:32] Kantoku
    Somewhere around here.
[08:36] Kantoku
    Don't you think it looks
    like a school party here?
[08:39] Hio
    It's cute, though.
[08:42] Hio
    Be careful.
[08:44] Kantoku
    Just kidding.
[08:45] Hio
    Jeez.
[08:50] Kantoku
    Merry...
[08:52] Hio
    Merry...
[08:55] All
    Christmas!
[09:01] Umio
    You really decorated the place.
[09:03] Hio
    It was a lot of work.
[09:05] Hio
    All right, everyone,
[09:07] All
    Woo hoo!
[09:08] ---
    Indeed!
[09:11] Sensei
    What? What's that?
[09:13] Hio
    You're dressing up, too, today, Sensei-chan.
[09:16] Sensei
    But—
[09:18] Kameko
    Cosplay is mandatory at
    Director's Christmas parties.
[09:21] Fu-girl
    Roar!
[09:23] Sensei
    No way!
[09:23] Hio
    Yes way!
[09:25] Sensei
    You can see my legs!
[09:26] Sensei
    I don't shave during winter!
[09:26] Kameko
    You'll be wearing tights, don't worry.
[09:28] Sensei
    Help me!
[09:29] Fu-girl
    I'm not siding with anyone.
[09:35] Sensei
    I-Isn't it a bit short?
[09:37] Hio
    No, you look good.
[09:40] Kameko
    This is rare!
[09:41] Sensei
    No pictures!
[09:42] Kameko
    What am I supposed to take
    pictures of, if not of you, Sensei?
[09:45] Sensei
    I don't look good in stuff like this.
[09:48] Hio
    What? You're cute.
[09:50] Hio
    Right, Umi-chan?
[09:56] Umio
    Yes, I-I think so.
[10:02] Sensei
    Why thank you.
[10:04] Umio
    Not at all.
[10:05] Kantoku
    Yeah, yeah, Sensei's cute!
[10:07] Kameko
    You're cute, Sensei!
[10:09] Fu-girl
    Sensei's cute.
[10:10] Kantoku
    Sensei's cute!
[10:12] Kameko
    Totally!
[10:13] Hio
    Sensei-chan's cute!
[10:15] Fu-girl
    Sensei is cute.
[10:17] Umio
    Sensei!
[10:18] Kantoku
    Sensei's over capacity.
[10:21] Kameko
    Let's take a commemorative photo.
[10:24] All
    Okay.
[10:25] Hio
    Make us look cute.
[10:26] Kameko
    Leave it to me.
[10:28] Kameko
    Ready, and cheese!
[10:30] Kantoku
    Wait, you get in, too.
[10:31] Kameko
    What? No, I'm more the
    person taking pictures.
[10:35] Kantoku
    Just get in.
[10:37] Kameko
    No!
[10:40] Kantoku
    Right there.
[10:42] Kameko
    R-Right in the middle?!
[10:43] ---
    No!
[10:44] Kameko
    I'll get my soul sucked out!
[10:46] Kantoku
    Your hat might get in the
    way, let's take it off.
[10:50] Kameko
    No way in hell!
[10:52] Kantoku
    Come on, come on!
[10:55] Hio
    Kame-chan, smile!
[11:00] Hio
    Let's eat.
[11:02] All
    Okay.
[11:05] Umio
    It's pretty fancy.
[11:07] Sensei
    I haven't had pizza in a long time.
[11:13] ---
    So good!
[11:14] Kantoku
    Have some of that.
[11:16] Umio
    Thank you.
[11:16] Hio
    Me, too.
[11:19] Kantoku
    I can't believe all of us are single.
[11:23] Kantoku
    We're a sad bunch.
[11:28] Umio
    No,
[11:29] ---
    I have a girlfriend.
[11:44] Umio
    Shall I fire it up?
[11:47] Kantoku
    Ah, fine.
[11:50] Kantoku
    It's the standard childhood friend route,
[11:54] ---
    but the sophisticated character
    expositions inside Kitsch-san
[11:56] ---
    make the Onomi-chan route really shine.
[11:59] Kantoku
    The script writer for the
    scenario, Tsumorin—
[12:01] ---
    Oops, I called her by her nickname.
[12:03] Kantoku
    The fans all know that before The
    Extra-Terrestrial Magic Girl XX

[12:06] ---
    writer Tsumorin, also
    known as Haruka Tsumori,
[12:09] ---
    became a light novel author,
    was the author of TREE.
[12:13] Kantoku
    The Onomi-chan route totally
    brings out her distinct style.
[12:17] Kantoku
    Especially the Ouija board scene
    in the third sleepover event.
[12:21] ---
    It even had its own art!
    It was a godly scene!
[12:24] Kantoku
    It's, like, the culmination of the talents
    of the writer and the actors and the artist.
[12:28] Kantoku
    It's just godly!
[12:30] Kantoku
    God!
[12:31] Kantoku
    Like, heaven!
[12:32] Kantoku
    Are you all listening?
[12:38] Umio
    Thanks for having us, Director.
SIGN    Hio-tan, Go Home
[12:40] Umio
    Thank you, thanks for having us.
[12:42] Kantoku
    I have the day off. See you tomorrow.
[12:45] All
    Okay.
[12:48] Kantoku
    All right, let's clean up.
SIGN    The Derpy Guy and the Quiet Girl
[12:59] Hio
    Oh, don't mind me.
[13:02] Kantoku
    Sure.
[13:19] ---
    Ni—
[13:24] Hio
    Why are you naked?!
[13:26] Kantoku
    Well, I just got out of the bath.
[13:28] Hio
    Do you mind?
[13:30] Kantoku
    You're the one that said, "don't mind me."
SIGN    Iris Zero
[13:46] Kantoku
    Maybe I should eat soon.
[13:48] Hio
    Oh, I want meat.
[13:51] Kantoku
    I never asked you.
[13:52] Kantoku
    How did you even know?
[13:53] Hio
    You're easy to read.
[13:56] Kantoku
    Fine, fine.
[14:03] Hio
    Not too spicy, please.
[14:12] Hio
    It's so good!
[14:14] Hio
    I didn't know you could cook. Wow!
[14:17] Kantoku
    You're kind of rude.
[14:23] Hio
    I died at the same spot again.
[14:26] Kantoku
    When are you going home?
[14:28] Hio
    A-After I beat this part.
[14:30] Kantoku
    Give it, I'll do it.
[14:35] Hio
    See, you can't do it, either.
[14:39] Hio
    No, don't hit me!
[14:45] Hio
    Yay, I finally finished it.
[14:48] Hio
    That took up a whole day.
[14:50] Kantoku
    I'm getting hungry, but there's
    nothing to eat at home.
[14:55] Kantoku
    Want to go eat dinner together, Hio-tan?
[15:00] Hio
    Okay.
[15:03] Hio
    Thank you, Director.
[15:05] Kantoku
    Hm?
[15:06] Hio
    I didn't want to be alone at home on a break.
[15:09] Hio
    I had fun today.
[15:11] Hio
    Could I come again?
[15:14] Kantoku
    Sure, you can.
[15:18] Kantoku
    If you go home right away.
[15:20] Hio
    Am I that much of a nuisance?! Jeez!
[15:27] Kantoku
    Aren't you leaving?
[15:28] Hio
    I came again.
[15:31] Kantoku
    I see.
SIGN    Umanohone Denki-gai Store
[15:48] Kantoku
    Happy New...
[15:51] ---
    ...Yea—
[15:57] Kantoku
    Put that away.
[15:59] Kantoku
    Here comes wave one!
[16:00] Kantoku
    Man your stations!
[16:01] All
    Yes!
[16:04] Fu-girl
    Me, too...
[16:10] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun!
[16:17] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun!
[16:19] Fu-girl
    Hang in there, Sommelier-kun!
[16:28] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun!
[16:32] Hio
    This is Comikat day four.
SIGN    Endless Carnival
[16:36] Kameko
    Thank you.
[16:38] Kameko
    Welcome.
[16:39] Sensei
    Register three is open.
[16:41] Sensei
    Please come here.
[16:43] Kantoku
    Excuse me, cart coming through.
    Please make way!
[16:46] Umio
    We're taking customers
    today one group at a time.
[16:48] Umio
    This group will be ending in ten minutes.
[16:51] Umio
    I want to go home.
[16:53] Kantoku
    Umio, set these up.
[16:55] A
    It's the new volume of Ramen-ya!
[16:57] B
    The new volume of Monmon Erohon.
[17:01] Umio
    Customers, please wait!
[17:05] Kantoku
    Umio!
[17:06] Kameko
    Welcome.
SIGN    My Sister and Girlfriend are Too Lovey-Dovey
[17:25] Hio
    Director.
[17:26] Kantoku
    I'll hold them off here.
[17:28] Kantoku
    You go help outside.
[17:47] Hio
    Please come in!
[17:54] Umio
    I want to go home.
[17:59] Sensei
    My arms, my back...
[18:02] Fu-girl
    My voice is gone.
[18:03] Hio
    I can't stand.
[18:05] Kameko
    I know.
[18:09] Kantoku
    Sorry, everyone.
[18:12] Hio
    Why are you apologizing, Director?
[18:15] Kantoku
    I know it's voluntary, but you
    always stay late every time.
[18:21] Kantoku
    I really feel bad.
[18:23] Fu-girl
    Director.
[18:27] Hio
    I don't mind.
[18:30] Hio
    I like manga. I like working with everyone.
[18:35] Kantoku
    Hio-tan.
[18:38] Fu-girl
    I-I like being with all of you, too.
[18:47] Fu-girl
    I like working with you.
[18:51] ---
    Fu Girl...
[18:52] Kameko
    They're right.
[18:55] Umio
    We all like this job.
[18:57] Sensei
    Even though it's tough sometimes.
[19:01] Kantoku
    You guys...
[19:03] Kantoku
    Okay, you have overtime tomorrow, too!
[19:06] All
    You ruined it!
[19:10] Umio
    I want to go home.
[19:23] Umio
    You kind of become quiet on your
    way home from work, don't you?
[19:27] Umio
    It's not like there's nothing to talk
    about, but it's kind of awkward.
[19:30] Umio
    Besides, you don't really know
    if you should sit next to
[19:33] ---
    the person when the train's empty.
[19:36] Sensei
    H-Hey, Umi-kun,
[19:38] ---
    Uh... yes!
[19:40] Sensei
    So, uh,
[19:43] ---
    there's a quiet shrine by my place.
[19:48] Sensei
    Do you want to come to the
    New Year's ritual there?
[19:53] Sensei
    I-It kind of bothers you unless
    you go on the First, doesn't it?
[19:56] Umio
    Yeah, it bothers you, right?
[20:14] Sensei
    Sorry, it's actually pretty crowded.
[20:17] Umio
    It's nothing compared to Umanohone today.
[20:20] Sensei
    That's true.
[20:21] Sensei
    Oh, yeah.
[20:23] ---
    I want to show you my special place.
[20:27] Umio
    Your special place?
[20:43] Umio
    It's so pretty.
[20:45] Sensei
    It's nice, right? This empty lot.
[20:47] Sensei
    There aren't any people here.
[20:48] Umio
    Do you come here often?
[20:51] Sensei
    Yeah, when I'm out of ideas and stuff.
[20:57] Umio
    By the way, what did you wish for?
[21:01] Sensei
    Well,
[21:05] ---
    isn't it obvious?
[21:08] Sensei
    I wished I could make my debut
    as a manga artist this year.
[21:13] Umio
    Yeah.
[21:21] Umio
    You can do it.
[21:23] Sensei
    Thanks.
[21:27] Sensei
    I'm such a cheater.
[21:32] Sensei
    I can't tell him I made two wishes.
[21:38] Sensei
    What did you wish for, Umi-kun?
[21:43] Umio
    It's a secret.
[21:44] Sensei
    What? You cheater!
[21:48] Sensei
    Tell me!
[21:50] Umio
    No, it's embarrassing!
[21:50] Umio
    Come on! Tell me!
SIGN    Next morning
[23:27] Kantoku
    You like work, right? You'll be fine.
[23:31] ---
    N-No!
SIGN    Manager
SIGN    Thank you for watching!
[23:38] Kantoku
    Next week is Valentine's Day.
[23:39] Kantoku
    We get to admire Hio-tan
    covered in chocolate.
SIGN    Please watch again next time!
[23:43] Hio
    No, we don't!
[23:44] ---
    We don't?
[23:44] ---
    
SIGN    Uma-kun's Recommendation!
SIGN    Appearing next week?! Watch again!
SIGN    Illustration: kona
SIGN    Eat My Chocolate Banana
SIGN    All the fujoshi across the country are in a panic! A love story between a sweets-loving high school guy (straight), who falls for a gay chocolate pâtissier (totally S)! Does he want to eat chocolate or his xxxx?! Panic! Panic!

4 - King of POP

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    King of POP
[00:05] Hio
    All right.
[00:09] Hio
    Good morning.
SIGN    World Heritage Site Series
SIGN    Very delicious.
[00:23] Hio
    Is this a World Heritage Site?
[00:26] Kantoku
    It's no fun just filling
    the shelves, so I set it up
[00:29] ---
    so that the staff each have one
    shelf of manga to promote.
[00:33] Hio
    One shelf each?
[00:35] Kantoku
    Yeah, and you all compete against
    the other shelves' sales.
[00:39] Hio
    So that's why we have this huge line-up?
SIGN    Come on Parthenon
[00:43] Kantoku
    And this is Kameko's shelf.
[00:45] Hio
    It's pretty elaborate.
SIGN    Open Borders Magical Girl
    Kurofune Uraga-chan
[00:54] Hio
    Is this Sensei-chan's art?
[00:56] Kantoku
    Yeah. She made it at home.
[00:59] ---
    She's making good use of her talents here.
[01:02] Hio
    Sensei-chan's amazing.
SIGN    Chef Sommelier's Recommendation! Will the Sommelier present his smile?
SIGN    Bringing you the best hand-picked manga
SIGN    Synopsis
[01:05] Hio
    This one's Sommelier-kun's shelf, right?
[01:09] Kantoku
    Yeah, he had Kameko take a
    picture and make a panel.
[01:12] Hio
    I can't believe he's selling himself.
[01:14] Kantoku
    He's the face of this store, after all.
[01:18] Kantoku
    I'm sure a lot of people will buy it
    just because Sommelier recommends it.
[01:22] Hio
    It's Sommelier-kun all right.
    They all look good.
[01:26] Kantoku
    Those two read an insane amount.
[01:29] Hio
    I see.
[01:30] Kantoku
    Next up,
[01:32] Kantoku
    Fu Girl's zombie shelf!
[03:06] Kantoku
    Next up,
[03:08] Kantoku
    Fu Girl's zombie shelf!
[03:10] Hio
    Which means...
[03:15] Hio
    Huh?
[03:17] Hio
    Huh?
[03:19] Hio
    It's kind of normal.
[03:21] Kantoku
    Yeah.
[03:22] Hio
    I was totally expecting
    Fuga-chan's shelf to be...
[03:25] Hio
    or...
[03:28] Hio
    or something along those lines.
[03:30] Kantoku
    I asked her not to do real zombies,
    because they're too violent.
[03:34] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You shouldn't do gore.
[03:36] (Flashback) Fu
    Oh, come on.
[03:37] Hio
    There are all kinds of restrictions, huh?
[03:39] Hio
    I wonder if there's anything I can read.
[03:55] Kantoku
    She can't do gore, so she's
    doing shock stuff instead.
[03:59] Fu
    We were actually practicing for
    Umio-kun to play a zombie, but...
[04:05] Umio
    Are you ready?
[04:06] Fu
    Yes.
[04:25] Umio
    Wait, stop!
[04:36] Fu
    So Umio-kun stopped cooperating.
[04:40] Hio
    You should have stopped there.
[04:42] Kantoku
    And last, but not least...
[04:44] Kantoku
    My shelf.
SIGN    Hio-tan loves it!
SIGN    Limited edition post cards
SIGN    Momotarou of Wakasa
SIGN    Brawns and Buttheads
[04:48] Hio
    I never gave you permission to use me!
[04:50] Panel
    I recommend this. Hio-tan reads
    it, too. A lady needs to read BL.
[04:54] Hio
    It's talking, too!
[04:55] Hio
    And it's so low-quality!
[04:58] Hio
    And why is it all BL?!
[05:00] Kantoku
    It's easier to focus on selling a
    single genre, and more effective.
[05:04] Panel
    I recommend this. Hio-tan reads
    it, too. A lady needs to read BL.
[05:06] A
    I smell it.
[05:06] B
    I do.
[05:07] C
    I smell it.
[05:08] All
    I smell boys' love!
[05:13] Kantoku
    See? I'm selling like crazy.
[05:15] Hio
    No way!
[05:16] Hio
    Stop it! My image!
[05:18] Kantoku
    But it's the best-selling shelf.
[05:21] ---
    Your femininity must be bringing
    out the dudeness of the covers.
[05:26] Hio
    N-No.
[05:29] Kantoku
    I'm counting on you from now on.
[05:31] Hio
    Fine, if you insist.
[05:34] Kantoku
    Hio-tan's easy to handle.
[05:37] Hio
    What about Umi-chan's shelf?
SIGN    Popular!!!
SIGN    Anime in the works
SIGN    Staff pick
[05:41] Hio
    It's plain.
[05:44] Umio
    You're all too wacky!
[05:46] Hio
    I'm a bit disappointed.
[05:47] Umio
    Oh, come on! I tried!
SIGN    Drifting Classroom
     Back to the ocean!
     No. 1 drifter manga
[05:50] Kantoku
    You like this manga, huh?
[05:52] Umio
    Yes, I've been reading the
    author's webcomics, too.
[05:56] Kantoku
    It looks normal at first glance,
    but you've chosen some promising books.
[06:00] Umio
    None of them are famous yet,
    but they're all manga that I like.
[06:04] Hio
    I get it.
[06:06] Hio
    It's because you all have manga that you like
[06:10] ---
    that you can present so many.
[06:13] Hio
    I'm counting on you, too.
[06:15] ---
    Okay.
[06:18] Hio
    But then, what kind of shelf should I make?
[06:24] Hio
    All the manga I like are mainstream.
[06:29] Sensei
    I think your only option would
    be to read a lot of manga.
[06:32] Kameko
    Indeed.
[06:34] Hio
    You're all so awesome.
[06:36] Hio
    You set up all those memorable shelves.
[06:40] Hio
    Kame-chan's photo and Sensei's
    manga are practically professional.
[06:43] Hio
    You're both good at it because
    you like doing it, right?
[06:46] Sensei
    Well, I do, I guess.
[06:48] Kameko
    I do.
[06:50] Hio
    I don't even have anything I like.
[06:53] Hio
    I don't have anything.
[06:58] Sensei
    That's not true.
[07:00] Sensei
    You just don't know what you like yet.
[07:04] Sensei
    Okay, let's go find it.
[07:11] Sensei
    Gotta have a change of perspective sometimes.
SIGN    Mikan Books
[07:18] Hio
    I-It's the—
[07:21] Hio
    It's Umanohone's rival store.
[07:23] Hio
    Our enemies in the Denki-gai bloodbath.
[07:28] Hio
    It's Mikan Books!
[07:30] Sensei
    It is.
[07:31] Hio
    Why are we here?
[07:33] Sensei
    We're spying!
[07:44] Sensei
    I don't think you have to hide.
[07:46] Hio
    But won't we get tortured if we get caught?
[07:49] Sensei
    Of course not.
[07:50] Fu
    Different stores have different
    ways of pushing books.
[07:54] ---
    You should check other stores sometimes.
[07:56] Hio
    Oh, really?
[08:00] Hio
    Are you interested in that book?
SIGN    Gleaming with Manliness
     Bouzuman's crowning achievement
[08:02] Sensei
    I can't see inside,
    and there's no marketing text.
[08:06] Sensei
    Still, I'm buying it.
[08:08] Sensei
    I like this cover, and this one.
[08:11] Sensei
    I'm buying it.
[08:14] Hio
    Can you tell from just the
    cover whether it's good or not?
[08:17] Sensei
    I can't.
[08:18] ---
    But it'd be a shame if there's a
    good one that I ended up not buying.
[08:23] Sensei
    Besides, it'd suck if it
    ended before it got popular.
[08:35] Sensei
    You'll never see the same manga twice.
[08:37] Sensei
    If there's ever a manga that I'm even
    slightly interested in, I buy it.
[08:43] Sensei
    Of course, a lot of times I don't
    have enough money to buy what want.
[08:47] Fu
    Can I go look upstairs?
[08:49] Kameko
    I want to see the figures.
[08:51] Sensei
    Sure, we'll be waiting here.
[08:54] A
    Yikes!
[08:56] Sensei
    See how they're true to their desires?
[09:00] Sensei
    But there are some that
    can never become honest.
SIGN    Games 3D History Adult Shoujo manga Comedy Shonen manga
[09:04] Sensei
    A store's job is to guide
    people to their desires.
[09:08] Sensei
    That's what the line-ups are for.
[09:10] Sensei
    Are you true to your desires, Hio-tan?
[09:13] Sensei
    That's, well...
[09:16] Sensei
    You really do want some books, don't you?
[09:20] Sensei
    You don't have to hide it.
[09:27] Sensei
    This is Denki-gai, the land
    where all desires are welcome.
[09:32] Hio
    Desires?
[09:33] Sensei
    So, Hio-tan, be honest about what you want.
[09:37] Hio
    Okay.
[09:43] Hio
    I want to read that book.
[09:49] Hio
    It's good. I like it.
[09:52] Sensei
    You're getting it now.
[09:58] Hio
    All those books I've been ignoring
    until now are sparkling.
[10:02] Sensei
    This sense when you enter a new genre
[10:04] ---
    of having found a mountain of treasures.
[10:05] Sensei
    Isn't it fun?
[10:07] Hio
    Yes, it's exciting.
[10:09] Hio
    I want to share this feeling with people.
[10:13] Hio
    Sensei, I'm going to make my shelf.
[10:16] Sensei
    I'm looking forward to it.
[10:21] Hio
    So this one goes here, and this one...
[10:27] Kantoku
    Hey, Hio-tan.
[10:30] Hio
    Kantoku.
[10:31] Hio
    I found a genre that I like.
[10:33] Kantoku
    Sports dramas and friend dramas.
[10:37] Kantoku
    You're enthusiastic, huh?
[10:38] Kantoku
    I'll pay you for overtime.
[10:40] Hio
    Thank you.
[10:42] Kantoku
    Oh, in that case,
[10:44] ---
    you should set these ones up, too.
[10:47] Kantoku
    And this one.
[10:48] Hio
    All this?!
[10:50] Kantoku
    You can read them at home.
    I'll buy them for you.
[10:53] Hio
    But I haven't read them yet,
    so I can't recommend them.
[10:58] Kantoku
    Let's say I recommend them, then.
[11:01] Kantoku
    I'll teach you how to
    arrange books effectively.
[11:05] Kantoku
    What's wrong?
[11:06] Hio
    No— Thanks.
[11:10] Hio
    You're nice when we're alone.
[11:15] Kantoku
    I'm always nice.
[11:16] Hio
    You're always mean to me.
[11:18] Kantoku
    You sure?
[11:19] Hio
    I'm sure.
SIGN    I love you! (As a friend)
SIGN    Hot and heavy
SIGN    Balls-out sports battle
SIGN    Anything goes, 'cause we're just friends!
SIGN    Approved by the Kantoku!
SIGN    Boys' friendship special!
[11:31] Umio
    Kantoku, just what did
    you do to Hio-tan-senpai?
[11:36] Hio
    Good morning, Kantoku!
[11:41] Kantoku
    Morning, Hio-tan.
[11:42] Kantoku
    How were yesterday's books?
[11:45] Hio
    I read them, but they're all—
[11:49] Hio
    they all go way past friendship!
[11:52] Kantoku
    Were they?
[11:54] Kantoku
    You knew, and you read all of them anyway.
[11:57] Hio
    But—
[11:58] Kantoku
    You read them.
[12:00] Hio
    I read them.
[12:03] Hio
    Why are you looking at me like that?
[12:05] Umio
    Hio-tan's shelf soon became the best seller.
[12:19] Fu
    Good morning.
[12:21] Hio
    Hey, Fuga-chan. Morning.
[12:23] Sensei
    Morning.
[12:25] Fu
    Here.
[12:30] Sensei
    Here, Sensei.
[12:32] Sensei
    Here, Hio-tan.
[12:33] Hio
    Thanks.
[12:34] Hio
    This one's for you.
[12:35] Hio
    Thanks, I'm happy.
[12:36] Sensei
    I totally forgot.
[12:38] Sensei
    Today is the biggest
    girl's event of the year.
[12:40] Sensei
    It's Valentine's Day!
[12:41] Sensei
    Also known as "National Standardized
    Girl Power Exam Final Answer Finals!"
[13:03] Sensei
    My girl power is too damn low!
[13:08] Hio
    Sensei-chan, are you okay?
[13:09] Fu
    Hey, Fumio-kun,
[13:13] Fu
    I, uh, I made a chocolate.
[13:18] Fu
    I thought you might like it.
[13:21] Umio
    Homemade, huh?
[13:23] Umio
    Thank you.
[13:29] Fu
    Melty zombie chocolate.
[13:31] Fu
    Like it was too early.
[13:33] Umio
    I don't really like zombies.
[13:37] Umio
    I don't really like zombies.
[13:39] Umio
    I don't like zombies.
[13:40] Umio
    I don't like zombies.
[13:43] Umio
    I'm really a zombie.
[14:03] Kantoku
    Looking for something?
[14:04] Fu
    K-Kantoku.
[14:06] Fu
    Where's Sommelier-kun?
[14:08] Kantoku
    Sommelier?
[14:09] Kantoku
    He's on 6th floor today.
[14:11] Fu
    Oh, yeah. Today is the Sommelier Party.
[14:15] Kameko
    Testing.
[14:17] Kameko
    The wait is over.
[14:19] ---
    Sommelier Party Valentine's Special!
SIGN    Sommelier Party Valentine's Special!
[14:27] Hio
    "Sommelier Party Valentine's Special"?
[14:30] Kantoku
    Yeah, it's a romance manga
    special for Valentine's Day.
SIGN    Prescription of Love
SIGN    Sommelier, Cupid of Love
SIGN    One-winged fallen angel arrives
[14:35] Kantoku
    First love, unrequited love, steamy love,
[14:37] ---
    pure love, cheating, school romance,
    office romance, long-distance romance.
[14:39] Kantoku
    He'll hook you up with anything.
[14:41] Hio
    Sommelier-san sure is amazing.
[14:45] A
    S-Sommelier-san, would you have this please?
[14:54] B
    Mine, too.
[14:55] C
    Me, too.
[14:57] Umio
    Sommelier-san is popular.
[15:00] Kantoku
    Yeah, and he has a lot of fans.
[15:03] Kantoku
    Every year, he gets a ton of chocolates.
[15:06] Kantoku
    That's roughly what he got last year.
[15:08] Umio
    All that?
[15:16] Kantoku
    Hey, Sommelier,
[15:18] Kantoku
    You remember this aura, don't you?
[15:30] All
    Ero-hon G-man-san!
[15:32] Hio
    She's back!
[15:34] (Flashback) G-men
    I am an ero book lover.
[15:38] (Flashback) G-men
    I am an ero book lover!
[15:52] G-men
    The book you showed that student just now.
[15:56] G-men
    Its content is rather extreme.
[15:58] G-men
    It's quite
[16:00] ---
    unwholesome!
[16:08] G-men
    The books you presented at
    the previous Sommelier Party
[16:11] ---
    were also unwholesome indeed.
[16:14] G-men
    However, I am
[16:19] ---
    an unwholesome human being!
[16:31] G-men
    I came today to thank you.
[16:36] G-men
    Please hook me up with more
    unwholesome books going forward.
[16:42] G-men
    Now, then.
SIGN    Take my chocolate banana
     in your mouth <3
[17:20] Sensei
    Which one is good?
[17:32] Sensei
    Which one is the right one?
[17:37] Sensei
    I choose you!
[17:41] A
    Hello.
[17:44] A
    Age verification, please.
[17:45] A
    Never mind, not for this one.
[17:50] Fu
    The Sommelier Party's over, right?
[17:52] Fu
    Where's Sommelier-kun?
[17:55] Kantoku
    He already went home.
[17:58] Kantoku
    You still haven't given him yours?
[18:01] Fu
    No, I'll give it to him some other day.
[18:07] Fu
    Sorry.
[18:08] Fu
    I'll go back to work.
[18:16] Kantoku
    It's fine. There aren't
    too many customers today.
[18:20] Kantoku
    You can still catch up to him.
[18:21] Fu
    Kantoku.
[18:24] Fu
    Thank you.
[18:26] Kantoku
    Yep, good luck.
[18:27] Fu
    Oh, and this.
[18:43] Fu
    There he is.
[18:44] Fu
    Sommelier-kun.
[18:48] Fu
    He walks so fast.
[18:52] Fu
    Sommelier-kun.
[18:54] Fu
    Sommelier-kun.
[18:57] Fu
    Sommelier-kun.
[19:01] Fu
    Sommelier-kun.
[19:12] Fu
    Sommelier-kun, where are we?
[19:29] Fu
    I ended up not catching
    you until you got home.
[19:37] Fu
    I'm in Sommelier-kun's room.
SIGN    Batalia
[19:46] Fu
    What's that manga? I really want to read it.
SIGN    28 Seconds Later
[20:13] Fu
    No, I didn't come here to read manga.
[20:16] Fu
    Beware, Sommelier's incredibly
    comfortable home.
[20:22] Fu
    I'm just here to give him something.
[20:25] Fu
    So why?
[20:27] Fu
    Why can't I bring it up?
[20:30] Fu
    Sommelier-kun.
[20:33] Fu
    H-Here.
[20:35] Fu
    For you.
[20:41] Fu
    Y-You can open it.
SIGN    Hot Chocolate Fudge
SIGN    Pour that hot chocolate on me...
[20:50] Fu
    Did you already have it?
[20:53] Fu
    You always teach me things.
[20:57] Fu
    So for once, I wanted to give you something.
[21:05] Fu
    Thanks for everything.
[21:07] Fu
    I hope you'll teach me more.
[21:18] Fu
    So can I come to your place again?
[21:23] Fu
    To read the rest, and stuff.
[21:56] Fu
    Why?
[22:01] Fu
    Why couldn't I give this to him?
SIGN    Manager
[23:37] G-men
    You want me to read the preview?
SIGN    Thank you for watching
[23:39] G-men
    I don't usually work after hours, but...
SIGN    See you again!
[23:41] G-men
    Very well.
[23:42] G-men
    Next episode is panty shots.
[23:44] G-men
    Understand? Panty shots.
[23:45] G-men
    Panty shots. Panty shots!
SIGN    Hot Chocolate Fudge
SIGN    Pour that hot chocolate on me...
SIGN    Illustration: Haruse Hiroki
SIGN    Uma-kun's pick!
[23:47] [SONG] Text
    Another uneventful Valentine's Day!
    A 2D gem to get you through the
    trials of reality!! Let's pour plenty
     of chocolate on this gift girl! (What)
SIGN    See you again!

5 - Panties in the Spring / I am Rain / Rustling

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] Sensei
    Umi-kun...
[00:05] Umio
    Yes?
[00:07] Sensei
    Do you... uh...
[00:13] ---
    want to see panties?
[00:15] Sensei
    I'm asking if you want
    me to show you panties.
[00:20] Sensei
    No, it's not like that!
[00:23] Umio
    Sensei-san.
[00:26] Sensei
    You like panties, don't you?
[02:00] (Flashback) Kantoku
    No good.
[02:02] (Flashback) Kantoku
    All the manga you draw
    have the same problem.
SIGN    Panties in the Spring
[02:07] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Your art is definitely good.
[02:09] (Flashback) Kantoku
    And your girls are cute.
[02:11] (Flashback) Kantoku
    They're cute, but there's
    a fatal lack of panties.
[02:19] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Panties provide a straightforward sexiness.
[02:22] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You don't do enough service.
[02:25] (Flashback) Sensei
    But I show panties in this frame.
[02:28] (Flashback) Sensei
    And I don't think people expect
    that kind of thing from my mangas.
[02:32] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Your panties aren't panties.
[02:34] (Flashback) Kantoku
    They're just a blob of cloth.
[02:37] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You can't just show them.
[02:39] (Flashback) Kantoku
    The situation leading up to the panties,
[02:41] (Flashback) Kantoku
    the ratio of panties to everything else,
[02:43] (Flashback) Kantoku
    the reactions of the characters...
[02:44] (Flashback) Kantoku
    All that goes into panties.
[02:47] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You can tell good panties from the draft.
[02:50] (Flashback) Kantoku
    So as part of your training,
     I'll have you set up this shelf.
SIGN    Spring Panties Festival
[02:58] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Umanohone's annual fair:
[03:00] (Flashback) Kantoku
    The Wholesome Erohon Special!
[03:02] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Also known as the Spring Panties Festival!
[03:05] (Flashback) Kantoku
    This example is from last year.
[03:07] (Flashback) Sensei
    "S-Spring Panties Festival."
[03:10] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Here's a hint:
[03:13] (Flashback) Kantoku
    There's no boy that hates panties.
[03:17] ---
    Boys don't hate underwear.
[03:21] Sensei
    And that's what he said to me.
[03:26] Umio
    These are all manga with good panties.
[03:30] Umio
    I'm not an expert, but this is all I know of.
[03:33] Umio
    Please read them.
[03:37] Sensei
    But it's spring. Why does Kantoku
    want to do a panties festival?
[03:43] Umio
    Sensei, don't you notice something?
[03:49] Sensei
    This is set in the spring.
[03:52] Sensei
    This one, too.
[03:53] Sensei
    And this one.
[03:53] Umio
    Exactly!
[03:54] Umio
    Panties are a given when you meet
[03:56] ---
    someone at the beginning
    of a new time in your life.
[03:57] Umio
    You fall over walking unfamiliar streets.
[03:59] Umio
    You get pranked by the wind in the
    uniform you aren't used to wearing.
[04:02] Umio
    The color of cherry blossoms.
[04:03] Umio
    The color of panties.
[04:06] Umio
    Spring is
[04:08] ---
    the season of panties.
[04:13] Sensei
    Spring is
[04:15] Sensei
    the season of panties.
[04:20] Umio
    I'm not an expert, but I know that much.
[04:22] Umio
    So here, Sensei-san.
[04:25] Sensei
    You can't even see the panties here.
[04:28] Sensei
    This isn't helpful.
[04:31] Sensei
    No.
[04:32] Sensei
    By hiding the panties so
    incessantly, it's as if...
[04:36] ---
    they're not wearing panties!
[04:39] Umio
    There's more to panties
    than just showing them.
[04:42] Umio
    By going to the very edge
    of not showing panties,
[04:44] ---
    you give the reader the hope that
    she might not be wearing any at all.
[04:48] Umio
    This is
[04:49] ---
    the Condition of Not Wearing panties!
[04:52] Umio
    There are infinite possibilities
    until the skirt is lifted.
[04:56] Umio
    It's known as Schrodinger's Panties!
[04:58] Umio
    I'm not an expert, but even I know that.
[05:01] Umio
    This is basic knowledge!
[05:03] Sensei
    I never knew.
[05:05] Sensei
    It's so deep.
[05:06] Umio
    All right then,
[05:08] ---
    let's build the panties shelf.
SIGN    Tentative Panties Festival Venue
[05:18] Sensei
    Just watch me, Panties Master!
SIGN    Mascot character
    Umanami-chan
SIGN    Umanami!
[05:26] Sensei
    I-It is done, Master.
[05:29] Umio
    Indeed, let's see.
[05:31] Umio
    The display pops out...
[05:33] Umio
    You've even used real panties
    to really catch people's attention.
[05:37] Umio
    And the manga...
[05:41] Umio
    A good assortment indeed.
[05:43] Umio
    I see many fresh panties.
SIGN    She Must Be Wearing Panties
    Dark Panties in Hell -- Panties are Hell!
    My Panties are Blue Once a Week
    Panties are actually tasty!! 100 Panty Recipes
    Panties! Panties! High school
    Anti-Panty
    Her and Her Panties
[05:50] Umio
    It's a liftable uniform skirt display!
[06:00] Umio
    Incredible!
[06:02] Umio
    It almost lifts up, but it doesn't.
[06:04] Umio
    Brilliant!
[06:05] Sensei
    And for the buyers of select products...
[06:10] Sensei
    A panties-style hat!
[06:13] Umio
    There's nothing to be
    ashamed of; it's just a hat!
[06:16] Umio
    Excellent.
[06:18] Umio
    I have nothing more to teach you.
[06:21] Umio
    I'm not an expert to begin with.
[06:22] Sensei
    Master!
[06:22] Sensei
    Panties Master!
[06:25] Umio
    That's enough acting.
[06:27] Sensei
    Yeah.
[06:28] Umio
    This is amazing.
[06:29] Umio
    It's full of good ideas.
[06:31] Sensei
    Thanks.
[06:32] Sensei
    It's thanks to you.
[06:34] Umio
    You surprised me at first, though.
[06:36] Umio
    You asked me if I wanted to see panties.
[06:37] Sensei
    That was a little mistake.
[06:41] Sensei
    Don't laugh!
[06:45] Sensei
    But you know,
[06:47] ---
    do you ever want to see my panties?
[06:57] Sensei
    I-I take it back.
[06:58] Sensei
    Never mind.
[07:00] Umio
    Y-Yes.
[07:06] Sensei
    Stop imagining it!
[07:07] Umio
    Sorry.
[07:10] Sensei
    Anyway,
[07:13] ---
    I thought I knew more or
    less everything about manga.
[07:18] Sensei
    Looks like I'm not there yet.
[07:20] Sensei
    Now I know I still have a lot to learn.
[07:24] Sensei
    All right,
[07:26] ---
    I'm going to write a good manga.
[07:30] Umio
    About that manga...
[07:36] Hio
    I'm late.
[07:38] Hio
    The store's going to open.
[07:42] Hio
    Hey.
[07:42] Umio
    Why...
[07:44] ---
    do you show Kantoku but not me?
[07:48] Hio
    Show? What?
[07:50] Sensei
    No, I'm showing Kantoku because
    he gives me good advice.
[07:54] Umio
    This is rude of me, but I'd like to
[07:59] ---
    at least see your panties!
[08:04] Umio
    No, that wouldn't mean anything.
[08:06] Umio
    Show me everything.
[08:09] Sensei
    N-Not everything. I'm too shy.
[08:11] Hio
    No duh!
[08:12] Umio
    But you'd show Kantoku everything?
[08:15] Hio
    You showed Kantoku everything?!
[08:17] Sensei
    But you're always looking
    forward to seeing it.
[08:20] Hio
    You're always seeing it?!
[08:22] Sensei
    I thought it might ruin half
    the fun if I showed you early.
[08:25] Hio
    What are you having fun doing?!
[08:28] Hio
    I can't handle anymore.
[08:29] Hio
    Help!
[08:30] Sensei
    And I'm too embarrassed to show you my draft.
[08:35] Umio
    Sensei, I like your manga.
[08:38] Umio
    Don't be embarrassed.
[08:39] Umio
    Be confident.
[08:44] Umio
    Thanks, I feel a little more confident.
[08:48] Kantoku
    Hio-tan,
[08:50] ---
    stop pulling me.
[08:51] Hio
    But they're— they're—
[08:54] Kantoku
    It's probably a misunderstanding
    on Hio-tan's part.
[08:57] Umio
    I want to see more than just your panties.
[09:01] Umio
    I want to see your boobs and butt!
[09:05] Sensei
    I-I get that you desire it.
[09:08] Sensei
    Please do from now on, then.
[09:11] Hio
    Umi-chan...
[09:13] Sensei
    Hio-tan?
[09:14] Umio
    Senpai!
[09:15] Sensei
    Hio-tan!
[09:16] Hio
    I never knew: finding out someone you
[09:19] ---
    thought was normal is really
    a pervert makes you cry.
[09:25] Uma
    Denki-gai no Honya-san.
[09:33] Fu
    The humidity's making my hair bouncy.
[09:35] Hio
    I know, right?
[09:37] Fu
    Hio-tan.
[09:38] Fu
    Do you have a hair dryer?
[09:39] Hio
    Forget it.
[09:40] Hio
    It doesn't matter how much you dry it.
    When it rains, it's going to end up like this.
SIGN    Poof
[09:44] Fu
    You're right.
[09:46] Hio
    Can't do anything about humidity.
[09:48] Sensei
    My hair's never ended up like
    that because of the humidity.
[09:52] Sensei
    Is it because I don't have enough girl power?
[09:58] Hio
    I bet Kame-chan has a hard time, too.
[10:01] Kameko
    Th-That's not true.
[10:07] Hio
    It's so much fuller than usual. Can I see?
[10:10] Kameko
    No.
[10:18] Hio
    Awesome afro.
[10:20] Fu
    It's cute.
[10:20] Kameko
    It's not an afro.
[10:23] Kameko
    I envy your pretty hair.
[10:26] Sensei
    R-Really?
[10:27] Kantoku
    We're opening now.
[10:29] ---
    Okay.
[10:31] Kantoku
    Huh? Where's Sommelier?
[10:32] Kameko
    He's not here yet.
[10:34] Sensei
    Is he late? That doesn't happen often.
[10:36] Hio
    Sommelie—
[10:46] A
    You, why are you dressed like that?
[10:48] Kantoku
    What are you doing, Sommelier?
[10:50] Sensei
    I want to do a life drawing.
[10:52] Kantoku
    Dude, Sensei!
[10:53] Sensei
    Can I touch you? For science?
[10:56] Kantoku
    Sommelier, wear something so
    you don't get Hio-tan excited!
[10:59] Hio
    I-I'm not excited!
[11:01] Kameko
    That's it, great!
[11:02] Kantoku
    Kameko!
[11:07] Kantoku
    What's up with your hair?
[11:08] Hio
    It was really poofy,
    so Hio-tan tied it for me.
[11:12] Hio
    It's weird, right?
[11:14] Kantoku
    It actually looks good on you.
[11:20] Kameko
    You're not going to get
    anything by complimenting me.
[11:25] Kantoku
    Okay, let's get ready for lunch, you two.
SIGN    Huge Boobs
SIGN    Ramen
[12:06] Fu
    It's really coming down now.
[12:29] Hio
    It's so humid.
[12:31] Hio
    I just shrinkwrapped this book,
    and it's already so wrinkly.
[12:34] Kantoku
    You should set the temperature lower.
[12:37] G-men
    How unwholesome.
[12:39] G-men
    Despicable.
SIGN    Despicable indeed.
SIGN    It's all unwholesome!
SIGN    This is for evidence.
SIGN    And I'd like the B bonus.
[12:50] Kantoku
    Thank you.
SIGN    Huge Boobs
[13:05] Kantoku
    What the hell are you doing, Sommelier?
[13:08] Kantoku
    Hio-tan, not you, too!
[13:10] Sensei
    Science! Science!
[13:11] Kantoku
    Stop it, Kameko!
[13:12] Kantoku
    Sensei, stop tinkering with it!
[13:13] A
    Put that girl down!
[13:15] A
    You!
[13:16] Kantoku
    Yes?
[13:17] A
    You're causing a ruckus!
[13:19] A
    All the time!
[13:19] A
    I'm busy, you know.
[13:21] Kantoku
    Sorry.
[13:33] G-men
    How unwholesome!
[13:36] G-men
    Your existence is unwholesome!
[13:39] G-men
    You walking book of unwholesomeness!
[13:43] G-men
    Riotous!
[13:44] G-men
    Despicable!
[13:45] G-men
    Research!
[13:46] G-men
    I must submit it as evidence!
SIGN    Please take me I like dried sardines
SIGN    Home Center
SIGN    Kitty litter
SIGN    Nyanderful Dried Sardines
SIGN    Kitty potty
[16:02] Umio
    What?!
[16:04] Umio
    The light novel author Tsumori Haruka
[16:06] ---
    a.k.a. Tsumorin is coming to Umanohone?!
[16:09] Kantoku
    She's holding a signing.
[16:12] Umio
    Tsumorin, the writer of the Die Heart 2
     Momohara Onomi-chan scenario.
[16:16] Umio
    I want to see her live, even just a glimpse!
[16:19] Hio
    I heard she's at the Uma office saying hi.
[16:22] Hio
    You should go.
[16:25] Umio
    No, I won't meet her.
[16:27] Hio
    Why not?
[16:28] Umio
    I could die to meet her,
[16:30] ---
    but it would be a an abuse of
    authority— a personal affair.
[16:33] Umio
    I will see her from a
    distance as another fan.
[16:36] Umio
    This is my duty as a fan!
[16:39] Umio
    I want to see her do well
    because she's a new author.
[16:43] Hio
    Are you going, Kantoku?
[16:45] Kantoku
    No, I'll pass.
[16:51] Tsumorin
    Hi, everyone.
SIGN    Tsumorin
[16:57] Tsumorin
    Good morning.
[17:00] Umio
    Tsumorin!
[17:01] Tsumorin
    Kan-chan, long time no see.
[17:03] Tsumorin
    How've you been?
[17:08] Umio
    Tsumorin was an Uma employee?
[17:10] Kameko
    Yeah, before she became a writer.
[17:13] Kantoku
    She insisted on helping.
[17:16] Kantoku
    But why are you dressed like that?
[17:18] Tsumorin
    It's my dress for today.
[17:20] Kantoku
    You still really like cosplay, huh?
[17:22] Kantoku
    Why didn't I start work earlier?
[17:25] Kantoku
    I want to go back in time and punch
    myself if it'd make me work at Uma!
[17:28] Kantoku
    Can you take your post, if you're helping?
[17:30] Kantoku
    You're stocking with Hio-tan.
[17:32] Kantoku
    Umio, you go to the back and put
    the bonuses in the magazines.
[17:35] Umio
    Please no, Kantoku!
[17:37] Hio
    Hey, they're pretty close.
[17:40] Hio
    I thought they didn't like
    each other, since Kantoku
[17:43] ---
    didn't seem to want to see her.
[17:46] Kameko
    Those two used to go out.
[17:49] Hio
    Yeah?
[17:56] Hio
    You mean, go out, not as
    in shopping and stuff?
[17:59] Kameko
    No, dating.
[18:01] Hio
    Not going out to karate or anything?
[18:02] Kameko
    As boyfriend and girlfriend.
[18:08] Tsumorin
    Nice to meet you, Hio-tan-san.
[18:10] Hio
    Nice to meet you.
[18:12] Hio
    I can't believe she used to date Kantoku.
[18:15] Hio
    What is she like, exactly?
[18:18] Kantoku
    Can you put those out?
[18:20] Tsumorin
    Okay.
[18:21] Tsumorin
    Here we go.
[18:24] Hio
    She picked up all those books at once!
[18:26] Hio
    I could never do that.
[18:29] Hio
    She's a skilled woman.
[18:32] ---
    Ow!
[18:36] Tsumorin
    I messed up.
[18:41] Kantoku
    I spent two hours stacking that tower!
[18:44] Tsumorin
    Sorry—
[18:46] Kantoku
    The big pop-up!
[18:48] Kantoku
    The banner!
[18:49] Kantoku
    The shelf!
[18:51] Hio
    This is a skilled woman?
[18:56] Kantoku
    Who asked you to join in?
[18:58] Hio
    I wanted to be a skilled woman.
[19:02] Tsumorin
    Kan-chan.
[19:03] Kantoku
    It's fine.
[19:04] Kantoku
    Go inside and insert the bonuses in the
[19:05] ---
    magazines and wrap them up for me.
[19:07] Kantoku
    You were the one that
[19:09] ---
    taught me not to carry
    more than you can handle.
[19:13] Tsumorin
    Sorry.
[19:14] Tsumorin
    I got carried away thinking about the past.
[19:19] Kantoku
    Damn.
[19:21] Kantoku
    She takes a lot of work.
[19:27] Tsumorin
    Sorry, I'm a klutz.
[19:30] Hio
    No, I am, too.
[19:33] Hio
    Like yesterday, I put up magazines
    before I hadn't counted them.
[19:36] Hio
    And I got slow and made a
    huge lineup at the register.
[19:39] Tsumorin
    It's tough.
[19:40] Tsumorin
    Kantoku used to get angry at me all the time.
[19:43] Tsumorin
    It brings back memories.
[19:46] Hio
    Kantoku gets angry at me all the time, too.
[19:49] Hio
    I got punished really hard yesterday.
[19:51] Tsumorin
    Really?
[19:54] Tsumorin
    Hey, what's Kantoku like?
[19:58] Hio
    He's mean, and he has a temper,
[20:04] ---
    and he's really weird.
[20:08] Tsumorin
    Kantoku hasn't changed.
[20:11] Tsumorin
    He used to tease me and be mean to me.
[20:15] Tsumorin
    And he used to wear a weird bikini.
[20:18] Hio
    She sounds so happy when
    she talks about Kantoku.
[20:23] Hio
    She must still—
[20:27] Hio
    I—
[20:34] Tsumorin
    Okay, Kan-chan,
[20:35] ---
    thanks for everything today.
[20:38] Kantoku
    All you did was make a mess, but sure.
[20:40] Tsumorin
    You're mean.
[20:44] Tsumorin
    I'm glad you're well.
[20:48] Tsumorin
    Can I come again?
[20:52] Kantoku
    As long as you don't get in the way.
[21:00] Umio
    Tsumorin went home already?
[21:02] Kantoku
    Yeah, she did.
[21:03] ---
    No!
[21:05] Umio
    There was so much I wanted
    to say and ask her.
[21:10] Umio
    May I visit you at home?
[21:12] Kantoku
    Why?
[21:14] Sensei
    I haven't been to Kantoku's place in a while.
[21:17] Kameko
    Can I come, too?
[21:19] Hio
    Okay, let's all go to Kantoku's house.
[21:22] Kantoku
    I never said you could.
[21:24] Hio
    But you said we could come again.
[21:30] Kantoku
    We have work tomorrow.
[21:32] Kantoku
    Go home in time for the last train.
[21:33] All
    Yay.
[21:38] Umio
    Come on, listen to me.
[21:41] Umio
    There are two versions of
    Tsumorin's debut work.
[21:44] Umio
    The expression is different
    in the middle section of
[21:47] ---
    page 120 in the second version.
[21:49] Umio
    "Mamiko licked the left eyeball"
    becomes "the right eyeball!"
[21:53] Umio
    This is crucial!
[21:54] Umio
    It changes the foreshadow in Volume 3 onward.
[21:57] Umio
    Are you listening, Kantoku?
[21:59] Umio
    Won't you understand?
[22:01] Kantoku
    Please, go home.
SIGN    Rustling
[22:03] Kantoku
    We're just getting started!
[22:04] Kantoku
    I don't want to!
SIGN    Manager
SIGN    Hi everyone, how are you?
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
SIGN    It's me.
SIGN    Who am I? Well, I'm the Umanohone mascot, Nami-chan the horse!
SIGN    See you next time!
SIGN    Call me Umanami-chan! Neigh!
SIGN    Mahou Shoujo XX From Another World
SIGN    Until the Time of XX, every part of you is mine.
SIGN    Illustration: Sakurazawa Izumi
SIGN    Uma-kun's recommendation!
[23:46] [SONG] Text
    The newest piece by the writer
    of Die Heart 2 Onomi-chan route,
    Tsumori Haruka. What is the Time of XX?
     I want to become the possessive,
     cute kemomimi mahou shoujo's pet!
SIGN    Watch again!

6 - Homeless

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] UH
    Good morning.
[00:03] Sensei
    Good morning.
[00:04] Hio
    You're here already?
[00:06] Sensei
    Yeah.
[00:09] Hio
    You're here early lately.
[00:11] Sensei
    A-Am I?
[00:14] Umio
    Sensei-san.
[00:17] Umio
    Your track jacket hasn't
    changed these past few days.
[00:24] Hio
    Don't you always wear the same track jacket?
[00:26] Umio
    No.
[00:28] Umio
    She actually has a lot of similar track jackets.
[00:30] Umio
    She changes them all the time.
[00:32] Hio
    Really?
[00:34] Umio
    That means Sensei-san hasn't
    gone home these past few days!
SIGN    Homeless
[02:12] Sensei
    Yes, it's true.
[02:14] Sensei
    I've been staying at work drawing manga.
[02:17] Sensei
    For the Bank Weekly newcomer award.
[02:22] Hio
    Sensei-chan, it's finally time.
[02:23] Umio
    Your first submission.
[02:26] Sensei
    But the due date is so near.
[02:29] Sensei
    I'm out of time.
[02:31] Sensei
    I don't have time to go back home,
[02:34] Sensei
    so I stayed at work.
[02:36] Sensei
    And I wore the same clothes.
    I fail as a girl.
[02:45] Umio
    How long have you been staying?
[02:48] Umio
    Two nights, so far.
[02:51] Hio
    You don't smell that bad, though.
[02:53] Sensei
    I do shower.
[02:54] Kameko
    You do smell nice.
[02:56] Sensei
    Stop sniffing me.
[02:57] Umio
    Where are you drawing?
[03:00] Sensei
    The Uma nap room.
[03:02] Umio
    There?
[03:10] Hio
    Oh, my.
[03:12] Umio
    Wow.
[03:13] Umio
    It's a complete manga workstation.
[03:16] Kameko
    What a difference!
[03:19] Umio
    So when's the due date?
[03:22] Sensei
    In four days.
[03:23] Umio
    How much left to do?
[03:25] Sensei
    About fifteen pages.
[03:27] Umio
    Fifteen?
[03:28] Umio
    Isn't that pretty bad?
[03:29] Umio
    Considering your pace.
[03:31] Sensei
    I know.
[03:33] Umio
    Can I help? I have tomorrow off.
[03:37] ---
    Um, well...
[03:39] Sensei
    This is my first submission.
[03:42] Sensei
    I want to do it by myself.
[03:45] Umio
    Oh.
[03:47] Umio
    Excuse me.
[03:53] Sensei
    Sorry, Umi-kun. Help me, please.
[03:57] Umio
    Don't worry.
[03:59] Umio
    No matter how much I help,
    your manuscript will be your work.
[04:04] Sensei
    Okay, thanks.
[04:07] Hio
    I'll help in any way I can.
[04:10] Kameko
    Me, too.
[04:13] Sensei
    Thanks.
[04:15] Umio
    All right, let's meet at
    the nap room after work.
[04:18] All
    All right.
SIGN    Mascot Umanami-chan
SIGN    Umanami!
[04:22] All
    Good work.
[04:24] Sensei
    Here's my finished draft manuscript.
[04:28] Sensei
    Umi-kun, draw the backgrounds
    based on the draft.
[04:30] Umio
    Okay.
[04:31] Sensei
    And scan the penned manuscripts,
    and apply the fills and screentones.
[04:37] Hio
    Okay.
[04:38] Kameko
    Roger that.
[04:47] Kameko
    All of my photo manipulation
    training was for this moment.
[04:52] Umio
    She sure is good.
[04:58] Kantoku
    Hey, go home. It's getting late.
[05:01] Hio
    Okay.
[05:02] Kameko
    Okay.
[05:04] Hio
    Okay, Sensei-chan, Umi-chan, good luck.
[05:07] Sensei
    Yeah, thanks.
[05:21] Sensei
    It's not like I didn't expect it,
[05:22] ---
    but it gets so quiet when
    it's just two of us.
[05:27] Sensei
    Maybe I should say something.
[05:31] Sensei
    I wonder if he feels awkward, too.
[05:35] Sensei
    I'm so embarrassed, it's all in my head.
[05:38] Sensei
    I'm pretty sure I used to be
    able to talk to him more easily.
[05:43] Umio
    Sensei-san.
[05:45] Umio
    Sensei-san.
[05:46] Sensei
    Wh-What is it, Umi-kun?
[05:48] Umio
    Can you check out the backgrounds?
[05:52] Sensei
    Yeah, keep it up, please.
[05:54] Umio
    Okay.
[05:55] Sensei
    You can get some sleep if you get sleepy.
[05:59] Umio
    You, too.
[06:14] Sensei
    Umi-kun, you must be beat.
[06:17] Sensei
    You can lay down the blankets
    and get some sleep.
[06:19] Umio
    You look like you're going to collapse, too.
[06:22] Umio
    You should sleep.
[06:24] Sensei
    I'm fine.
[06:26] Umio
    I'm fine, too.
[06:27] Sensei
    Go ahead.
[06:29] Umio
    No, you first.
[06:31] Sensei
    No.
[06:36] Umio
    Let's sleep together, then.
[06:37] Sensei
    What?
[06:41] Sensei
    How can I sleep?
[06:43] Sensei
    What is he thinking?
[06:45] Sensei
    Does this mean he doesn't
    think anything of me?
[06:49] Sensei
    But he said—
[06:51] (Flashback) Umio
    You're a girl, Sensei-san.
[06:54] Sensei
    And now he doesn't treat
    me like a girl at all.
[06:58] Sensei
    I'm a girl, too.
[07:00] Sensei
    It's all because I have so little girl power.
[07:03] Sensei
    How can I sleep?
SIGN    Three days before the deadline
[07:15] Hio
    See you tomorrow.
[07:17] Umio
    See you.
[07:20] Sensei
    Tomorrow's a break.
    I have to work hard and catch up.
SIGN    Two days before the deadline
[07:32] Hio
    Morning.
[07:33] Hio
    I brought you a new track jacket.
[07:39] Sensei
    Thanks.
[07:46] Sensei
    I'm not making as much progress as I thought.
[07:49] Sensei
    I underestimated how much
    time I need for each page.
SIGN    One day before the deadline
[07:58] Sensei
    I don't want to draw anymore.
[08:01] Sensei
    I'm not going to make it.
[08:06] Umio
    I was worried this would happen.
[08:08] Umio
    Sensei-san becoming a baby.
[08:11] Umio
    Hio-tan-senpai isn't here to talk her down.
[08:15] Umio
    Let's get some sleep for now
    and wake up early tomorrow.
[08:19] Sensei
    We seriously won't make it if we sleep now.
[08:22] Umio
    You're pretty rational in a weird way.
[08:25] Umio
    But we're not making any progress.
[08:35] Umio
    Sensei-san,
[08:38] Sensei
    Yeah?
[08:39] Umio
    If you make your debut, you're going to quit
[08:43] ---
    Uma when your serial starts, aren't you?
[08:47] Sensei
    But I'm not good enough to make it.
[08:51] Sensei
    Look at me now.
[08:53] Sensei
    I won't make it.
[08:56] Umio
    I don't like that about you.
[09:05] Sensei
    Umi-kun hates me.
[09:07] Umio
    I'm not finished.
[09:09] Umio
    I can understand you losing confidence.
[09:12] Umio
    I know you're worried.
[09:13] Umio
    But,
[09:15] ---
    that just puts everyone's support to waste.
[09:20] Umio
    Be more confident.
[09:23] Umio
    I could never make as good
    manga or drawings as you do,
[09:26] ---
    no matter what.
[09:29] Umio
    I don't have talent, the way you do.
[09:35] Sensei
    Don't talk like it's about talent.
[09:39] Sensei
    I worked hard to be able
    to draw like I do now.
[09:48] Umio
    See, you know you worked hard.
[09:53] Umio
    Don't dismiss your own effort.
[09:57] Umio
    It's frustrating to me
[09:59] Umio
    that I can't draw manga that's
    as good or as fun as yours.
[10:05] Umio
    That you're denouncing something I like.
[10:08] Umio
    It's frustrating.
[10:13] Umio
    I like you.
[10:16] Umio
    I admire you as a manga artist.
[10:22] Sensei
    Thanks, but I'm not a manga artist yet.
[10:27] Umio
    You're right.
[10:29] Umio
    Let's just get some sleep.
[10:33] Sensei
    Good night.
[10:44] Sensei
    Now I can't sleep.
[10:47] Sensei
    Stupid Umi-kun.
[10:59] Sensei
    How long do you plan to sleep?
[11:02] Sensei
    There are still more backgrounds to do.
[11:06] Umio
    That's my Sensei!
SIGN    Due date
[11:09] Sensei
    The deadline is this afternoon,
    when the post office closes.
[11:13] Umio
    We'll be done penning at this
    rate, but not finished.
[11:17] Kantoku
    Good work.
[11:19] Umio
    Kantoku.
[11:20] Kantoku
    Looks like you're in a bind.
[11:21] Kantoku
    I'll help.
[11:23] Sensei
    But—
[11:24] Kantoku
    All assemble!
[11:29] Kantoku
    Kameko, Hio-tan, you're doing the finishes.
[11:31] ---
    Yes, sir!
[11:32] Kantoku
    Sommelier, you find resources from
    manga to use as post-process effects.
[11:37] Kantoku
    Fu Girl, find resources
    to use as backgrounds.
[11:39] Fu
    Okay.
[11:44] Kantoku
    Umio, you check the backgrounds and finishes.
[11:47] Kantoku
    Sensei does the final checks.
[11:48] Kantoku
    Focus on the penning.
[11:51] Umio
    Okay.
[11:52] Kantoku
    Let's get this done.
[11:54] Kantoku
    We have no time to waste.
[11:58] Umio
    Yes.
[12:00] Sensei
    Thank you.
[12:02] Kantoku
    It's past twelve.
[12:04] Kantoku
    Full steam, everyone.
[12:06] All
    Yes.
[12:08] Sensei
    Number 2 pen tip, please, anyone.
[12:10] Kantoku
    Sommelier, take this 5,000
    yen to Unimate. Run!
[12:17] Kantoku
    Fu Girl, take care of Sensei's sweat
[12:19] Kantoku
    and then do the fills.
[12:21] Fu
    Okay.
[12:25] Umio
    Fill the X marks.
[12:27] Umio
    It's the opposite of anime. Be careful.
[12:29] Fu
    Okay.
[12:30] Sensei
    Who did this sand tone?
[12:32] Hio
    Sorry, that was supposed to be 10% 60 line.
[12:36] Kantoku
    We're at three hours.
[12:37] Kantoku
    Don't look up.
[12:38] Kantoku
    Move your hands.
[12:39] All
    Yes.
[12:45] Sensei
    I'm done.
[12:46] Sensei
    I'm done penning.
[12:49] Umio
    All that's left is the finish.
[12:51] Kameko
    We're going to make the deadline.
[12:53] Hio
    Congratulations, Sensei-chan.
[12:56] Sensei
    Here, Kameko-chan,
    scan this and do the finish, please.
[13:00] Kameko
    Okay.
[13:01] Hio
    I'll start cleaning up.
[13:05] Hio
    Huh?
[13:07] Hio
    It's not coming off.
[13:08] Umio
    Be careful, the ink's fastened
    on with putty eraser.
[13:44] Kantoku
    Biggest baby in history.
[13:47] Kantoku
    Hio-tan.
[13:48] Kantoku
    Mommy mode! Calm her down!
[13:53] Kantoku
    Not you, too.
[13:56] Kameko
    It's over.
[14:03] Kantoku
    I can't stop the baby chain.
[14:06] Kantoku
    It's over.
[14:32] Umio
    It's over.
[14:37] Sensei
    We don't have time to be crying.
[14:39] Hio
    Let's work.
[14:40] Kameko
    I'll scan in the parts that are okay.
[14:43] Kantoku
    I-It's a miracle.
[14:47] Kantoku
    28, 29, 30, 31, 32.
[14:51] Kantoku
    All right, we're done.
[14:52] Kantoku
    Okay, I'll send this stamped
    under today's date.
[14:55] Sensei
    We made it.
[14:57] Hio
    Good work.
[15:00] Kameko
    I'm so done.
[15:03] Sensei
    When is Umi-kun going to stop crying?
[15:06] Hio
    But now we can get some rest.
[15:09] Sensei
    What are you talking about?
[15:14] Sensei
    We're starting on the
    summer Comikat manuscript.
[15:27] [SONG] Text
    One day, in the Umanohone basement.
[15:30] Sensei
    Hey,
[15:31] ---
    why did you bring me here?
[15:34] Sensei
    And why am I tied up?
[15:37] Tsumorin
    Tsumorin's "Operation Sensei-chan
    Girl Power Upgrade."
[15:41] Tsumorin
    Here we go!
[15:46] Tsumorin
    First, let's start by
    evaluating your girl power.
[15:50] Tsumorin
    Watch this footage.
[15:56] Sensei
    Wow, this is kind of cool.
[16:02] Kantoku
    I really can't believe it.
[16:04] Kantoku
    That such a girl would exist.
[16:07] Sensei
    It's Kantoku, isn't it?
[16:09] Sensei
    Kantoku made this video, didn't he?
[16:12] Sensei
    It's not fiction.
[16:14] Sensei
    These are actual scenes.
[16:16] Sensei
    I have a bad feeling about this.
[16:19] Kantoku
    Please watch this.
[16:22] Sensei
    It's me, working in Uma overnight.
SIGN    Sensei Girl Power Check
[16:28] Kantoku
    She's wiping her glasses with her t-shirt.
[16:30] Kantoku
    It's unacceptable for a
    girl to behave this way.
SIGN    Girl power -2
SIGN    Girl power minus two.
[16:35] Sensei
    What's this video?
[16:37] Tsumorin
    It's Uma security footage.
[16:40] Hio
    They have cameras in every room.
[16:43] Kantoku
    What's this? She's leaving the room.
[16:46] Kantoku
    She's going for a drink.
[16:49] Kantoku
    She opened the fridge.
[16:51] Kantoku
    But there's only a little oolong tea left.
[16:54] Kantoku
    Straight from the bottle!
[16:56] Kantoku
    She's drinking straight from a 2 liter bottle!
[16:58] Kantoku
    Despite having a cup in her hand!
SIGN    Girl power -3
SIGN    Girl power minus three.
[17:02] Sensei
    Don't look!
[17:05] Kantoku
    And she's choking!
[17:06] Kantoku
    It was more than she thought!
[17:08] Sensei
    Stop, please!
[17:11] Kantoku
    She's wiping with her sleeve!
[17:13] Kantoku
    She's wiping her wet mouth with her sleeve!
SIGN    Girl power -5
SIGN    Girl power minus five.
[17:16] Kantoku
    What's happening now?
[17:20] Kantoku
    It looks like she's going
    to eat the yakisoba.
SIGN    Night Store Yakisoba Sanpei-chan
[17:23] Kantoku
    A midnight snack devoid of girl power.
SIGN    Girl power -5
SIGN    Girl power minus five.
[17:27] Sensei
    It's none of your business!
[17:29] Kantoku
    Now she's boiling water.
[17:32] Kantoku
    Oh? What's this?
[17:35] Sensei
    Oh, I put the sauce powder in first.
[17:38] Kantoku
    Do you understand what happened?
[17:40] Sensei
    I already know.
[17:41] Sensei
    That's enough!
[17:43] Kantoku
    She hasn't noticed! She's going for it!
[17:46] Kantoku
    Oh, no! She finally noticed! So slow!
[17:50] Kantoku
    Behold, this expression.
[17:51] Sensei
    Don't show my face!
[17:54] Kantoku
    She'll have to live with it.
[17:55] Kantoku
    And here we go... Draining the water.
[17:58] Kantoku
    And epic fail!
[18:03] Kantoku
    She's picking it up! Three second rule!
[18:05] Kantoku
    Listen to what she says about this.
[18:06] (Flashback) Sensei
    It's okay, the hot water kills
    all the germs in the sink.
SIGN    Girl power -10
SIGN    Girl power minus ten.
[18:11] Kantoku
    What is she going to do
    with this bland yakisoba?
[18:14] Kantoku
    She's seasoning it.
[18:17] Kantoku
    She gets points for cooking.
SIGN    Girl power plus one.
SIGN    Girl power +1
[18:23] Kantoku
    Apparently, it's not good.
[18:25] Kantoku
    Look at her face.
[18:27] Sensei
    Stop showing my face!
SIGN    Girl power -20
SIGN    Girl power minus twenty.
[18:31] Kantoku
    She eats it anyway!
[18:34] Kantoku
    Back to work.
[18:36] Kantoku
    On the computer, it seems.
[18:39] Kantoku
    What's this?
[18:40] Kantoku
    Her computer's acting up.
SIGN    Error A grave and critical error has occurred. Give up Sleep, already
[18:44] Kantoku
    Her PC crashed! This is bad!
[18:47] Kantoku
    She might have lost several hours of work.
[18:50] Kantoku
    She's hitting it!
[18:52] Sensei
    Stop it!
[18:54] Kantoku
    And straight to baby mode!
[18:56] Kantoku
    No one can stop her.
SIGN    Five hours later
[19:00] Sensei
    It hasn't been that long.
[19:03] Kantoku
    Oh? What's going on?
[19:06] Kantoku
    She wakes up!
[19:08] Kantoku
    And wipes with her sleeves!
[19:11] Kantoku
    She's bringing down her girl power real good.
SIGN    Girl power -10
SIGN    Girl power minus ten.
[19:15] Sensei
    Leave me alone.
[19:17] Kantoku
    Looks like she's going to give up
    on her PC work and start penning.
[19:21] Kantoku
    Right off the bat she spills ink!
[19:26] Kantoku
    She's wiping it!
[19:28] Kantoku
    But it's not coming off!
[19:32] Kantoku
    What's she going to do?
[19:35] Kantoku
    What's this? She's hiding it with boxes!
[19:38] Kantoku
    What treachery is this?
[19:41] Sensei
    Stop it!
[19:43] Kantoku
    And back outside.
[19:49] Kantoku
    She went to the corner store.
[19:51] Kantoku
    It's her second midnight snack of the night.
SIGN    Girl power -30
SIGN    Girl power minus thirty.
SIGN    Oolong tea
    
     Ume
[19:57] Kantoku
    She bought a rice ball.
[19:58] Kantoku
    And it came with a wet wipe.
[20:01] Kantoku
    What's she doing with the wet wipe? No.
[20:05] Kantoku
    She's wiping her face!
[20:07] Kantoku
    She's wiping her face with the wet wipe!
SIGN    Girl power -100
SIGN    Girl power minus one hundred.
[20:10] Sensei
    Stop it!
[20:11] Kantoku
    Let's see that in slow motion.
[20:14] Sensei
    Don't slow it down!
[20:16] ---
    In addition...
[20:18] Kantoku
    She's wiping her neck, too!
[20:21] Kantoku
    She couldn't possibly go further.
[20:23] Kantoku
    Two-combo:
    Girl power -250.
[20:26] Kantoku
    She's wiping her frames.
[20:28] Kantoku
    Nothing can stop her now.
[20:30] Kantoku
    Three-combo:
    Girl power -400.
[20:34] Kantoku
    Now she's wiping her pen tip!
[20:35] Kantoku
    How far is this going to go?
[20:37] Kantoku
    Four-combo:
    Girl power -500.
[20:40] Kantoku
    And to top it off,
    she's using it as a coaster.
[20:44] Kantoku
    A terrifying combo attack!
[20:46] Kantoku
    Five-combo: Girl power -600.
    Monster kill!
[20:50] Kantoku
    And morning comes.
[20:52] Kantoku
    She has to go to work.
[20:56] Kantoku
    Looks like she's done for now.
[20:59] Kantoku
    She comes to the kitchen.
[21:03] Kantoku
    She's showering!
[21:04] Kantoku
    She's showering in the kitchen!
SIGN    Girl power -1000
SIGN    Girl power minus 1000!
[21:09] Hio
    She said she was showering.
[21:12] Hio
    Is this what she was talking about?
[21:14] Kantoku
    And she takes a sweat napkin,
[21:17] ---
    and she wipes her entire body!
    Her whole body!
SIGN    Girl power -1500
SIGN    Girl power minus 1500.
[21:22] Kantoku
    And she sprays her armpits!
[21:25] Kantoku
    And Fair-breeze on her clothes!
[21:27] Kantoku
    But this brings her girl
    power up just slightly.
[21:29] Kantoku
    The Fair-breeze Effect!
[21:31] Kantoku
    Girl power plus two.
SIGN    Girl power +2
[21:32] Sensei
    I don't want your meager points!
[21:36] Kantoku
    And then—
[21:38] All
    Good morning.
[21:41] Sensei
    Morning.
[21:43] Kantoku
    Back to work in the same
    clothes, same underwear!
[21:45] Kantoku
    And her poker face!
SIGN    END
SIGN    The end.
[21:56] Tsumorin
    She's going to need to start
    training from scratch.
SIGN    Death becometh thee on The Way of the Lady.
SIGN    —Sensei
SIGN    Manager
[23:37] Tsumorin
    Tsumorin here.
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
[23:38] Tsumorin
    Are you drinking?
[23:39] Tsumorin
    You can't drink if you're underage.
SIGN    See you next time!
[23:42] Tsumorin
    We're all going to the
    hot springs next episode.
[23:44] Tsumorin
    We're rubbing our wet
    bodies against each other.
[23:47] [SONG] Text
    Operation Sensei-chan Girl Power Upgrade
SIGN    Illustration: Kumajet
SIGN    See you again!

7 - To the bath house... / A Full Chest

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:14] Sensei
    Summer Comikat's over.
[00:17] Hiotan
    I'm so tired.
[00:18] Fu
    I'm so sweaty.
[00:20] Kameko
    Seriously.
[00:21] Kantoku
    All right, let's go to the
    hot springs to celebrate.
[00:24] All
    Hot springs?
[00:25] Umio
    Oh, yeah. There's one nearby.
    A big hot spring place.
[00:30] Umio
    It's called "Oedo Onsen Monogatari."
[00:32] Kantoku
    Yeah.
[00:33] Kantoku
    We can bathe and eat.
[00:35] Tsumorin
    Kan-chan.
[00:39] Tsumorin
    I knew it was you.
[00:41] All
    Tsumorin.
[00:43] Umio
    It's Tsumorin!
[00:44] Tsumorin
    Umi-kun.
[00:46] Tsumorin
    Thanks for coming to my space.
[00:48] Umio
    You remembered me!
[00:53] Hiotan
    Hey, would you like to
    come to the party with us?
[00:56] Hiotan
    We're going to Oedo Onsen Monogatari.
[00:58] Tsumorin
    I'll go. Is it okay?
[01:00] Hiotan
    It's okay, right, Kantoku?
[01:03] Kantoku
    Fine, I guess.
[01:05] Hiotan
    Kantoku's paying!
[01:07] Kantoku
    Dude, I never said—
[01:10] Tsumorin
    Oedo Onsen is collaborating with
    Attack on Uncle right now.
[01:14] Hiotan
    Uncles? I can't wait.
SIGN    To the bath house...
[02:51] [SONG] Text
    Oedo Onsen Monogatari
SIGN    Attack on Uncle Festival
SIGN    Entrance
SIGN    Attack on Uncle Oedo Onsen Festival
[02:59] Kantoku
    Come on, let's go.
[03:01] Kameko
    Wait, one second.
SIGN    Entrance pass
[03:08] Hiotan
    So we can shop with this, huh?
[03:11] Hiotan
    Cool.
[03:12] Kantoku
    Don't spend more than you need.
[03:13] Kantoku
    You'll end up wasting a ton of
    money if you're not careful.
SIGN    Echizen Shop
[03:19] Tsumorin
    This is where you rent your yukata.
[03:23] Sensei
    I never thought there'd be so many kinds.
[03:28] Sensei
    They're all so cute.
[03:32] Sensei
    Am I really cut out to wear these?
[03:37] Sensei
    No, these are all things
    that the store is selling.
[03:40] Sensei
    I can do it.
[03:42] Tsumorin
    Oh, you're pretty serious.
[03:46] A
    Sorry, sir. We don't have
    any yukatas bigger than L.
[03:52] Fu
    You could wear something
    a little smaller, right?
SIGN    Facility Guide
[03:55] ---
    There are so many types of baths to enjoy!
SIGN    Baths
SIGN    Foot bath
[03:59] Sensei
    A foot bath!
[04:00] ---
    How fancy!
SIGN    Bedrock spa
[04:02] Kameko
    It's a bedrock spa.
[04:04] Tsumorin
    It's good for your beauty.
SIGN    Sand bath
[04:06] Fu
    Sand bath.
[04:07] Tsumorin
    They bury you.
SIGN    Hot water pool
[04:09] Hiotan
    And a hot water pool.
[04:12] Tsumorin
    That's sexy.
SIGN    Women
[04:19] Hiotan
    This is my first time here.
[04:22] Tsumorin
    I've been here a few times after Comikat.
[04:26] Hiotan
    It's close by, isn't it?
[04:28] Kameko
    It's convenient for the locals,
    since they can stay the night.
[04:32] Fu
    Really?
[04:34] Sensei
    What should I do?
[04:35] Sensei
    I've never been to a hot
    spring with anyone else.
[04:38] Sensei
    I don't know the protocol.
[04:41] Sensei
    Should I take off my glasses?
[04:43] Sensei
    Do I hide my underparts?
[04:44] Sensei
    What about my boobs?
[04:46] Sensei
    Am I allowed to go in
    with a towel like on TV?
[04:49] Sensei
    Is it okay if my hair gets in the bath water?
[04:51] Sensei
    Do I wash myself off before
    I get into the bath? Or after?
[04:55] Fu
    What's wrong, Sensei?
[04:58] Sensei
    Sorry, I don't know what to do.
[05:02] Tsumorin
    I know, this bath house is a bit different.
[05:06] Sensei
    Where do we get our towels?
[05:08] Tsumorin
    Well—
[05:09] Hiotan
    I can't wait to see the bath!
[05:12] Hiotan
    First!
[05:14] Sensei
    No fair.
[05:15] Fu
    Me, too.
[05:16] Tsumorin
    Wait, everyone.
SIGN    Waiting Room
[05:37] Tsumorin
    You're still supposed to
    wear your yukata there.
[05:39] All
    You could have told us sooner!
[05:44] Hiotan
    That was so horrible.
[05:47] Fu
    I can't get married anymore.
[05:49] Tsumorin
    Poor you.
[05:51] Hiotan
    You could have told me, Kame-chan.
[05:54] Kameko
    Nah, I figured I could
    get some good pictures.
[05:57] Hiotan
    You took pictures?
[05:59] Tsumorin
    Anyway, girls, we have to
[06:02] ---
    check your boobs.
[06:05] Sensei
    What're you doing?
[06:06] Tsumorin
    Girls at a hot spring. What else would we do?
[06:10] Sensei
    That's the custom?
[06:12] Hiotan
    She's lying! She's making it up!
[06:16] Tsumorin
    You're next, Hio-tan.
[06:21] Tsumorin
    Quite a handful.
[06:23] Hiotan
    Th-Thanks.
[06:24] Tsumorin
    Now, who's next?
[06:31] Tsumorin
    Want to talk about boys or something?
[06:35] Tsumorin
    Do you have a crush, Sensei-chan?
[06:38] Sensei
    W-Well—
[06:40] Tsumorin
    You do, don't you?
[06:41] Tsumorin
    Who is it?
[06:42] Sensei
    What about you, Fuga-chan?
[06:45] Fu
    I—
[06:47] Fu
    What about you, K-K-K-Kameko-chan?
[06:53] Tsumorin
    That's bittersweet.
[06:55] Tsumorin
    Do you have a crush, Hio-tan?
[06:57] Hiotan
    Me?
[06:58] Hiotan
    I— Nope.
[07:01] Tsumorin
    Really?
[07:02] Hiotan
    R-Really.
[07:04] Tsumorin
    Oh.
[07:05] Tsumorin
    But you should make sure you don't
    regret not having realized sooner.
[07:12] Hiotan
    Sure.
SIGN    Women
[07:14] Tsumorin
    You can't wear your yukatas like that.
[07:19] Tsumorin
    Your neckline's too loose.
[07:21] Tsumorin
    Your sash is too low.
[07:22] Tsumorin
    That's no way to tie it.
[07:25] Tsumorin
    Just wrong.
[07:27] Tsumorin
    Make sure you can't see your underwear.
[07:31] Tsumorin
    The sash goes above your
    belly button, without a fold.
[07:33] Tsumorin
    Tie it like this, and show your nape.
[07:38] Tsumorin
    See, there you go.
[07:44] Sensei
    What do you think?
[07:46] Hiotan
    It's really cute.
[07:48] Tsumorin
    I knew you'd look good.
[07:50] Tsumorin
    Since you have black hair and modest boobs.
[07:54] Sensei
    Yeah?
[07:55] Tsumorin
    There's someone you like, isn't there?
[07:58] Tsumorin
    You have to make an effort.
[08:02] Sensei
    Okay.
[08:07] Sensei
    Sorry to keep you waiting.
[08:16] Tsumorin
    Sorry we took so long.
[08:19] Kantoku
    We didn't wait that long.
[08:20] Kantoku
    Hey, Sensei, you look good in a yukata.
[08:22] Kantoku
    Right, Umio?
[08:23] Umio
    Y-Yeah, you look good.
[08:25] Sensei
    Th-Thanks.
[08:27] Tsumorin
    See, there you go.
[08:29] Sensei
    Yes.
[08:30] Fu
    Sommelier-kun,
[08:33] ---
    what do you think of me?
[08:35] Fu
    My yukata.
[08:45] Sensei
    They have stalls, too. It's like a festival.
SIGN    Attack
    on
    Uncle
SIGN    Attack on Uncle
     Noodles
    Pork Bowl
    Eat this!
[08:48] Umio
    Hey, that store has a collaboration menu.
[08:51] Hiotan
    Hey, hey, let's go have fun.
[08:54] Kantoku
    Yeah, you're right.
SIGN    Limited Time
SIGN    Defeat the Uncle!
[09:01] Hiotan
    I missed again.
[09:04] Hiotan
    One more time.
[09:05] A
    Okay.
[09:06] Kantoku
    I told you not to waste your money.
[09:14] A
    Three of three.
[09:16] A
    Here's your prize.
[09:18] Hiotan
    Wow, Kantoku.
[09:21] Kantoku
    Have it.
[09:22] Kantoku
    You wanted it, didn't you?
[09:26] Hiotan
    Thank you.
[09:30] ---
    Kan—
[09:31] Hiotan
    But why did you get it for me?
[09:34] Kantoku
    I just wanted to play.
[09:38] Umio
    I won!
SIGN    Catch the Superball
[09:50] Umio
    I messed up!
[09:52] Tsumorin
    Having fun, everyone?
[09:55] Kantoku
    You're drinking?
[09:57] Tsumorin
    Nothing beats this after a bath.
[09:59] Kantoku
    Don't drink too much.
[10:02] Tsumorin
    I'm fine.
[10:04] Tsumorin
    Hey, Sensei-chan.
[10:07] Tsumorin
    Girl power scouter!
SIGN    Gyoza
SIGN    Ramen
SIGN    Unkempt Yukata
SIGN    Dirty Mouth
SIGN    Messy Hair
SIGN    Girl power:
[10:14] Tsumorin
    Only two girl power.
[10:16] Tsumorin
    You're worthless.
[10:17] Sensei
    Worthless?!
[10:18] Kantoku
    She's getting drunk.
[10:19] Tsumorin
    I'm not drunk.
[10:31] Sensei
    The rocks...
[10:53] ---
    
[11:07] Kantoku
    What kind of pictures did you get?
[11:09] Kantoku
    Let me see.
[11:10] Kameko
    Here you go.
[11:13] Kantoku
    You take some good pictures.
[11:16] Kameko
    Thank you.
[11:18] Kantoku
    Hey, you're not in any of them.
[11:20] Kameko
    That's—
[11:22] Kantoku
    I'll take one.
[11:24] Kantoku
    Smile.
[11:25] Kameko
    I don't want to.
[11:27] Kantoku
    Why not?
[11:28] Kameko
    Don't tell me it'll suck your soul out again.
[11:30] Kameko
    No, well—
[11:40] Kameko
    I'm not really one for the spotlight.
[11:45] Kantoku
    Kameko.
[11:49] Kameko
    I'm going to go play with the others.
[11:56] Tsumorin
    Kan-chan,
[11:59] ---
    let me put my head on your knees.
[12:02] Kantoku
    What are you talking about?
[12:04] Tsumorin
    Please, or I'll
[12:08] ---
    puke.
[12:09] Kantoku
    You're going to puke?
[12:12] Kantoku
    Fine.
[12:14] Tsumorin
    This brings back memories.
[12:16] Tsumorin
    You always did this for me when I got drunk.
[12:21] Tsumorin
    You'd pat my head, and I'd always
    be like "blarh" all over your knees.
[12:30] Kantoku
    Puke now, and I'll throw you out.
[12:33] Tsumorin
    I won't.
[12:34] Tsumorin
    It's not like it was before.
[12:37] Tsumorin
    So can't we
[12:40] ---
    go back to how we were before?
[12:49] Kantoku
    Sorry.
[12:54] Kantoku
    There's someone I like.
[13:03] Tsumorin
    Yeah?
[13:06] Tsumorin
    I knew that.
[13:10] Tsumorin
    You haven't changed at all.
[13:14] Tsumorin
    You always act angry and
    mean to girls you like.
[13:18] Tsumorin
    But...
[13:20] ---
    I guess it was just me that changed.
[13:26] Kantoku
    Tsumorin.
[13:28] Kantoku
    My knees are warm.
    You puked, didn't you?
[13:30] Kantoku
    You—
SIGN    August 31st!
[13:51] Kantoku
    All right, everyone.
[13:53] Kantoku
    Are you fired up?
    It's the last day of August.
SIGN    It's the last event of the summer: the Summer Fair...
SIGN    Summer Fair
[14:03] ---
    cleanup.
[14:08] Kantoku
    Hio-tan, with that...
[14:10] Hiotan
    Yes?
[14:12] Kantoku
    Can you fold that up and put it in a box?
[14:15] Hiotan
    Okay.
SIGN    Osaka Summer
    Light Novel Fair
[14:17] Umio
    You don't throw these things out, huh?
[14:19] Kantoku
    Yeah, we send them back to the publisher,
[14:22] Kantoku
    partly to prevent reselling.
[14:25] Hio; Umi
    Ah, that makes sense.
[14:26] Kantoku
    They're pretty strict these days.
[14:29] Kantoku
    We don't get to keep
    posters and stuff, either.
[14:32] Umio
    Really?
[14:33] Kantoku
    Put the Summer Fair stuff
    back on their usual shelves.
[14:36] Fu
    Okay.
[14:37] Kantoku
    And put the returns into the returns boxes.
[14:40] Fu
    Okay.
[14:41] Umio
    Just how do you get so much
    strength out of those thin arms?
[14:44] Fu
    I-I'm not that strong.
[14:46] Fu
    It's more about balance.
[14:48] Umio
    Are you sure?
[14:51] Sensei
    Maybe that's more strength.
[14:53] Umio
    Strength is power, huh?
[14:56] Sensei
    Don't talk about me like
    I'm some kind of brute.
[14:59] Hiotan
    That thing Kantoku said at the hot springs...
[15:04] Hiotan
    That there's someone he likes...
SIGN    Summer is the season of love
[15:07] Hiotan
    Someone he's always mean
    to, but sometimes kind to.
[15:13] Hiotan
    Could that be...
[15:16] Hiotan
    I'm being too self-conscious.
[15:17] Fu
    You're bending it, Hio-tan.
[15:21] Hiotan
    Sorry.
[15:23] Umio
    Do you have heat stroke?
SIGN    Comic Rankings
[15:24] Hiotan
    No, I'm fine.
[15:28] Hiotan
    How does Kantoku really feel?
[15:38] All
    Hio-tan!
[15:46] Kantoku
    That's your second time.
[15:49] Hiotan
    It is.
[16:00] Hiotan
    I'll go back to cleaning.
[16:03] Kantoku
    No, that's enough.
[16:05] Kantoku
    You stay here and make
    pop-ups for the Autumn Fair.
[16:26] Hiotan
    How did this happen?
[16:28] Hiotan
    And what's up with this pop-up?
SIGN    Well-bearing boobs
    Harvest festival
    Freshly-picked
[16:30] Hiotan
    I seriously don't get it.
[16:32] Hiotan
    Um...
[16:34] Hiotan
    Why is it a boobs festival in the autumn?
[16:37] Hiotan
    We got enough boobs in the summer.
[16:40] Kantoku
    You know how they say
[16:41] ---
    the cooper makes a lot of
    money when the wind blows?
[16:43] Hiotan
    What?
[16:44] Kantoku
    Autumn is the season of fruit.
[16:46] Kantoku
    Fruits and berries bear in the fall,
    corn crops are ready for harvest,
[16:50] ---
    and the markets are filled with food.
[16:53] Hiotan
    Sure.
[16:54] Kantoku
    And the body stores nutrition to
    prepare itself for the coming winter.
[16:59] Kantoku
    Autumn is the season of appetite.
    What exactly does that mean?
[17:06] A
    They got bigger again.
[17:09] Kantoku
    Aye, the females' breasts grow big.
[17:12] Kantoku
    S-Say it ain't so!
[17:16] Kantoku
    Autumn is the season of full breasts.
[17:19] Kantoku
    QED.
[17:21] Hiotan
    Oh, really? Good for you.
[17:24] Kantoku
    Come on, you're so cold.
[17:27] Hiotan
    I've gotten used to your
    messing around like that.
[17:33] Kantoku
    Aren't you a bit weird these days?
[17:38] Hiotan
    I-I'm the same as always.
[17:41] Kantoku
    No, you're not.
[17:42] Hiotan
    I am.
[17:45] Kantoku
    Wait,
[17:46] ---
    do you have a fever or something?
[17:50] Hiotan
    I don't.
[17:52] Hiotan
    I'm fine.
[17:55] Kantoku
    Don't get so angry.
[17:57] Kantoku
    You really are weird.
[17:59] Kantoku
    Are you still worried about that time
[18:02] ---
    when you were naked at the hot springs?
[18:04] Hiotan
    Please forget about that!
[18:07] Kantoku
    It was the most memorable
    incident of the summer.
[18:09] Hiotan
    Stop it!
[18:11] Hiotan
    If you don't forget, I'll...
[18:14] ---
    I'll...
[18:15] Kantoku
    Calm down, I didn't see too clearly.
[18:19] Hiotan
    Are you sure?
[18:20] Kantoku
    I'm sure.
[18:22] Kantoku
    You were covered by some
    really awkward lighting.
[18:25] Hiotan
    Okay, then.
[18:27] Kantoku
    But damn, you're quite—
[18:30] Hiotan
    You saw, didn't you?
[18:32] Kantoku
    I mean, you're pretty big.
[18:34] Kantoku
    Are those Fs?
[18:35] Kantoku
    More?
[18:36] Hiotan
    Stop trying to guess my size.
[18:38] Kantoku
    Don't worry, though, I really
    didn't see your private parts.
[18:41] Hiotan
    That's not the point.
[18:43] Hiotan
    This is bad. He's completely messing with me.
[18:46] Hiotan
    I need to take back control.
[18:48] Hiotan
    But how?
[18:50] Hiotan
    I need to change the subject.
[18:53] Hiotan
    What else should I talk about?
[18:55] Hiotan
    Or should I just ask him straight up
[18:58] ---
    if he likes me or not?
[19:04] Hiotan
    K-Kantoku, um...
[19:08] Hiotan
    What if he says "yes"?
[19:11] Hiotan
    But I can't go on like this.
[19:14] Hiotan
    K-Kantoku! Um, do you... do you... do you...
[19:22] ---
    do you like my boobs?
[19:30] Hiotan
    I totally messed that up.
[19:35] Kantoku
    Hio-tan, I...
[19:39] Kantoku
    I like boobs.
[19:45] Kantoku
    Of course, I love your boobs, too.
[19:49] Kantoku
    I like how you can tell how big
    they are even under your apron.
[19:52] Kantoku
    And the dip that the handbag handle
    makes —the boob slash— is exquisite.
[19:56] Kantoku
    And boobs in a bikini are orgasmic.
[19:59] Hiotan
    Wh-What are you talking about?
[20:01] Kantoku
    Well, you're the one who asked.
[20:07] Hiotan
    Whose boobs do you like
    more: Tsumorin's or mine?
[20:16] Hiotan
    What am I doing asking that?
[20:19] Kantoku
    Hio-tan:
[20:21] Kantoku
    Huge boobs, little boobs,
    giant boobs, no boobs,
[20:25] Kantoku
    there are all kinds of breasts,
[20:27] ---
    but they're just labels
    that people put on them.
[20:31] Kantoku
    God only made one word: boobs.
[20:36] Kantoku
    Do you not think it's arrogant of us
    to label them in smaller categories?
[20:42] Kantoku
    And so I declare.
[20:44] Kantoku
    All sizes, all shapes, all colors:
    I appreciate all boobs.
[20:53] Kantoku
    I love all boobs,
[20:57] Kantoku
    so I cannot judge them.
[21:08] Hiotan
    Does that mean you don't care whose they are?
[21:14] Hiotan
    It means you're happy with anyone's boobs.
[21:18] Hiotan
    You boob philanthropist!
[21:20] Hiotan
    You boob pacifist!
[21:22] Hiotan
    You boob hussy!
[21:37] Hiotan
    Sensei.
[21:40] Kantoku
    It's the opposite of usual.
[21:41] Fu
    Hio-tan's being a baby.
[21:43] Sensei
    What's wrong, Hio-tan?
    Is Kantoku being mean to you?
[21:48] Hiotan
    No.
[21:49] Hiotan
    No, but...
[21:54] Kantoku
    What the hell?
[21:57] Kantoku
    What brought that up?
SIGN    A Full Chest
SIGN    Manager
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
[23:38] Hiotan
    Sensei-chan's going on a date?
[23:40] Sensei
    A date? Well...
SIGN    See you next time!
SIGN    What do I do?
[23:44] Hiotan
    Enjoy.
SIGN    Illustration: Kato Kazue
SIGN    See you next time!

8 - Subtly Rough

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    The Sleeping One
[01:37] Sensei
    Good morning.
[01:40] Sensei
    What's wrong, Umi-kun?
[01:42] Umio
    That's my line.
[01:44] Umio
    Are you okay?
[01:45] Umio
    You were working on your manuscript for the
    exhibition in the nap room, weren't you?
[01:50] Sensei
    I finished the manuscript
    earlier. Don't worry.
[01:57] Kantoku
    We're going to have a lot of
    new doujins coming in.
[02:00] Kantoku
    Clear that flatbed and start
    stacking them, please.
[02:02] S; U
    Okay.
[02:03] Kantoku
    Make sure the new ones are visible.
[02:05] Umio
    Okay.
[02:12] Umio
    What's wrong, Sensei?
[02:14] Sensei
    I'd like one.
[02:16] Kantoku
    This isn't the exhibition.
[02:18] Sensei
    Look at all this stock!
[02:20] Sensei
    I'll freak out if we don't sell all of them.
[02:22] Umio
    This isn't your booth, Sensei!
[02:24] Umio
    Get a grip!
[02:26] Sensei
    Think of all the boxes that'll
    be left if we don't sell them.
[02:33] Umio
    Dammit, she needs help, soon.
[02:40] Sensei
    Where am I?
[02:43] Sensei
    Is the exhibition over?!
[02:45] Sensei
    I haven't sold a single copy!
[02:48] Umio
    Get some sleep, please.
[02:50] Umio
    And jeez,
[02:52] ---
    the nap room's been upgraded again.
[02:55] Umio
    It's practically a professional workspace.
[02:57] Kantoku
    Sensei draws our pop-ups and panels, too.
[03:07] Sensei
    Th-The stock...
[03:09] Sensei
    The room's so small
    because of all these boxes!
[03:12] Umio
    She's having the same dream again.
[03:20] Sensei
    Where am I?
[03:22] Umio
    Ah, you're awake.
[03:24] Sensei
    Y-Yeah...
[03:25] Umio
    You fell asleep, Sensei-san.
[03:28] Sensei
    Um... So in my dream,
    I was at the exhibition, and then...
[03:37] Sensei
    That actually happened.
[03:39] Umio
    Are you all right, Sensei-san?
[03:41] Umio
    I can't believe you worked so
    hard that you ended up like that.
[03:46] Sensei
    Of course I would.
[03:48] Sensei
    I get to hear from the
    readers at the exhibition.
[03:51] Sensei
    I get to see them happy with my work.
[03:54] Sensei
    There are people waiting for my manga.
[03:57] Sensei
    How could I not work?
[04:00] Umio
    Sounds like the Sensei that I know.
[04:01] Sensei
    But I can't let it affect my work.
[04:04] Sensei
    I'll be careful next time.
[04:06] Umio
    Oh, yeah. There was something
    I wanted to ask you.
[04:09] Umio
    That manga you wrote for the newcomer award.
[04:12] Umio
    How did it go?
[04:16] Sensei
    Well...
[04:18] Sensei
    I didn't get the award.
[04:20] Umio
    I see...
[04:22] Sensei
    But they said that I was promising,
    so I have an assigned editor now.
[04:27] Umio
    That's amazing!
[04:29] Sensei
    So, anyway...
[04:30] Umio
    Yes?
[04:30] Sensei
    The editor asked me if I wanted to work
    as an assistant for a manga artist.
[04:36] Umio
    That great—
[04:38] Umio
    If you started working as an assistant,
    does that mean you'd quit Uma?
[04:44] Sensei
    Yeah.
[04:45] Sensei
    Actually, I'm already doing assistant work.
[04:50] Sensei
    The author's publication is once a month,
    so I was going to work there along with Uma.
[04:56] Sensei
    But it overlaps with my doujin work, too,
    and you've seen what happens.
[05:01] Sensei
    I get it, I can't do both.
[05:04] Umio
    Sensei.
[05:05] Sensei
    But I don't want to quit Uma.
[05:08] Sensei
    And I want to do my assistant work.
[05:11] Sensei
    Hey... What do you think, Umi-kun?
[05:18] Umio
    I think you should prioritize
    your assistant work.
[05:24] Sensei
    I see. Of course.
[05:27] Umio
    You have a goal that you're working towards.
[05:31] Umio
    I don't think you have to stick to Uma.
[05:33] Sensei
    But I'll be sad,
    not being able to see you guys.
[05:42] Sensei
    Thanks, Umi-kun.
[05:46] Kantoku
    I see... An assistant, huh?
[05:49] Sensei
    Yes, and I don't want to cause
    any more trouble because of it.
[05:54] Sensei
    So, I...
[05:57] Sensei
    It was brief, but thank you.
[06:02] Kantoku
    I see.
[06:03] Kantoku
    I guess it can't be helped.
[06:04] Sensei
    Sorry.
[06:07] (Flashback) Hio
    What? Sensei-chan's quitting?
[06:09] (Flashback) Umio
    It's for the better.
[06:11] (Flashback) Umio
    So sudden.
[06:12] (Flashback) Umio
    Sensei has a dream.
[06:14] (Flashback) Umio
    Let's send her off with smiles.
[06:15] (Flashback) Kameko
    It's going to get lonely.
[06:32] Hio
    Thank you.
[06:34] Sensei
    Good work.
[06:37] Sensei
    Let's switch.
[06:38] Sensei
    I slept well, so I'm fully charged.
[06:41] Hio
    Good luck.
[06:43] Sensei
    Thanks.
[06:47] Hio
    Take care of your health.
[06:49] Hio
    Sleep and eat well, okay?
[06:51] Sensei
    All right.
[06:53] Hio
    You can't drink that and that together, okay?
[06:56] Hio
    It's bad for you.
[07:00] Sensei
    All right, I'll be careful.
[07:02] Sensei
    What's up with you?
[07:05] Hio
    Sensei-chan...
[07:07] Hio
    This is for you!
[07:08] Sensei
    Th-Thanks.
[07:13] Hio
    Use it when you turn into a baby.
[07:18] Sensei
    I'll be okay without you around now, Hio-tan.
[07:20] Fu-girl
    Sensei-chan, this is for you.
[07:23] Hio
    My digitizer pen.
[07:26] Fu-girl
    I made that cap.
[07:28] ---
    I couldn't think of what might be
    useful when you're an assistant.
[07:33] Sensei
    You knew?
[07:37] Sensei
    Yeah, it's true.
[07:39] Kameko
    Good luck.
[07:40] Sensei
    Thanks.
[07:45] Sensei
    Th-That's...
[07:47] Sensei
    Night Panda Volume 4!
    I've been looking for that.
SIGN    Night Panda 4 Sugawara Okina Breeding is Justice!
SIGN    It sold out right away, and they never made more copies.
SIGN    They call it a manga world heritage.
SIGN    Have I ever told you about it?
[07:59] Hio
    Wow, Sommelier-kun.
[08:03] Kameko
    It was brief, but it was fun.
[08:11] Umio
    Sensei,
[08:14] ---
    I have a request.
[08:21] Umio
    If you ever make your debut,
    please make me your assistant.
[08:29] Sensei
    You're hasty as usual.
[08:31] Sensei
    But I'm happy.
[08:33] Sensei
    I'd like for you to.
[08:34] Umio
    Yes, please.
[08:39] Hio
    Sensei-chan, don't worry about us.
[08:41] Hio
    Just make a big debut and
    become a star manga artist.
[08:45] Fu-girl
    I'll learn how to make pops.
[08:47] Fu-girl
    Even though I won't be as good as you.
[08:50] Kameko
    You have to come visit sometimes.
[08:52] All
    We'll be fine without you.
    So don't worry, just find your future.
[09:01] Umio
    Sensei-san, the room's so
    empty now that you're gone.
[09:07] Umio
    But I'll get used to it.
[09:10] Umio
    So don't worry, Sensei-san.
[09:14] Sensei
    W-Wait a second!
[09:16] Kantoku
    You're all making a mistake.
[09:20] All
    Kantoku.
[09:21] Kantoku
    Seriously...
[09:23] (Flashback) Sensei
    It was brief, but thank you.
[09:27] (Flashback) Kantoku
    I see.
[09:29] (Flashback) Kantoku
    I guess it can't be helped.
[09:30] (Flashback) Sensei
    Sorry.
[09:31] (Flashback) Kantoku
    But what you're saying
    is you don't have time.
[09:35] (Flashback) Sensei
    Yes.
[09:36] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Then do you want fewer shifts?
[09:38] (Flashback) Sensei
    Really? I-I can continue?
[09:41] (Flashback) Kantoku
    I'd rather you don't quit so suddenly anyway.
[09:43] (Flashback) Kantoku
    As long as you work properly, I don't mind.
[09:46] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You were fine when you weren't
    working on your Comikat manuscript.
[09:50] (Flashback) Sensei
    Yes, thank you!
[09:55] Umio
    We're done here.
[10:06] Kantoku
    Seriously.
[10:07] Kantoku
    What are you doing, putting work aside?
[10:14] Sensei
    Thank you.
[10:17] Umio
    Good for you, Sensei.
[10:20] Sensei
    Hey, Umi-kun.
[10:23] Sensei
    Can I take back what I said earlier?
[10:26] Umio
    What?
[10:27] Sensei
    Can you help me starting now, rather than
    just after I make my professional debut?
[10:33] Umio
    Sure.
[10:34] Sensei
    In fact, starting tonight.
[10:38] Sensei
    You! Wake up!
[10:41] Sensei
    We're finishing up and making copies by 7 AM.
[10:44] Umio
    Okay.
[10:47] Umio
    I want to go home.
[10:56] [SONG] Text
    Please take me home.
    I like human meat
[12:23] Umio
    You're in a good mood, Sensei-san.
[12:25] Sensei
    Can you tell?
[12:26] Umio
    Yes, it's obvious.
[12:28] Sensei
    It's payday today.
[12:29] Sensei
    I'm going to see this movie
    that's opening tomorrow.
[12:32] Umio
    Oh yeah, I can't wait for it either.
[12:32] [SONG] Text
    Scarf Justice
    Yasuda Suzuhito
    Movie Confirmed
[12:34] Sensei
    Oh, really?
[12:35] Sensei
    Why don't we go together tomorrow, then?
[12:39] Umio
    Sure.
[12:40] Umio
    Let's go, then.
[12:41] Umio
    I'll contact you later.
SIGN    Take Me to the Movies
[12:41] [SONG] Text
    The Mouth is the
    Gateway to Pleasure
[12:45] Sensei
    I didn't realize because I was in a weird mood,
SIGN    Subtly Rough
[12:48] ---
    but I accidentally invited him out.
[12:51] Sensei
    Isn't this actually what they call a date?
[12:53] [SONG] Text
    What do you think of
    Sensei-chan going on a date?
[12:53] [SONG] Text
    Don't do it
[12:53] [SONG] Text
    Not interested
SIGN    I want yakisoba bread Good luck
SIGN    Whatever
[12:53] [SONG] Text
    Denki-gai staff survey
[12:57] Umio
    Sorry.
[12:59] Sensei
    No, I'm sorry.
[13:00] Sensei
    Wh-What?
[13:02] Sensei
    Just stay still.
[13:04] Sensei
    You had popcorn on you.
[13:09] Sensei
    Your eyes don't look good with popcorn.
[13:12] Sensei
    Isn't it our first time going out,
    just the two of us?
[13:16] Sensei
    First time.
[13:20] Sensei
    I should get ready.
[13:26] Sensei
    I can't go dressed like this.
[13:28] Sensei
    I have to dress more cute,
    and I have to wear contacts.
[13:32] Sensei
    Lipstick and stuff?
[13:37] Sensei
    Umi-kun, I'm here.
[13:40] [SONG] Text
    Weird Ancient Greece-ish Sandals
[13:41] [SONG] Text
    Weird Woman-face T-shirt
[13:42] [SONG] Text
    Some Glittery Bag
[13:43] [SONG] Text
    Weird Wristband
[13:44] [SONG] Text
    Weird Giant Sun Glasses
[13:46] [SONG] Text
    Weird Bead Necklace
[13:46] [SONG] Text
    Too Much Pink
SIGN    Weird Earrings
SIGN    Eyelash Extensions
[13:48] [SONG] Text
    White Around the Eyes
SIGN    Extensions
[13:48] [SONG] Text
    Thin Eyebrows
[13:50] Sensei
    Let's go.
[13:51] ---
    You know, Sensei-san...
[13:54] Umio
    What are you being so gung-ho for?
[13:56] Umio
    We're just going to a movie.
[13:58] Umio
    Lame.
[14:00] Sensei
    No way.
[14:03] Sensei
    I have to be more rough and subtle.
[14:05] Sensei
    I can't let him know what I'm thinking.
[14:07] Sensei
    More indifferent, and with a tracksuit top?
[14:10] Sensei
    No, more rough!
[14:16] Sensei
    Tracksuit bottom!
[14:17] Sensei
    And a worn-out tee-shirt!
[14:19] Sensei
    The casual stains and moth
    holes add to my roughness.
[14:23] Sensei
    More.
[14:24] Sensei
    More!
[14:25] Sensei
    It's still not rough enough.
SIGN    More, like a suburban wife with a husband living away for work.
[14:27] [SONG] Text
    This is Sensei's perception.
    It does not reflect the staff's understanding.
SIGN    Like a reclusive hermit Not in Education, Employment or Training.
[14:37] God
    Do you seek roughness?
[14:40] Sensei
    The God of Roughness!
[14:42] Sensei
    You shall have!
[14:45] Sensei
    I've got some ideas.
[14:48] Sensei
    I'll have gyoza and ramen the night before.
[14:51] Sensei
    And I should have some
    legendary stamina food.
[14:54] Sensei
    All right, I'm getting rough.
[14:57] Sensei
    I won't take a bath, either.
[14:59] Sensei
    And I'll have ramen and
    gyoza that morning, too.
[15:01] Sensei
    The back fat that gets on my hair
    will subtly bring out my roughness.
[15:06] Sensei
    I'm not done yet.
[15:07] Sensei
    Rougher.
[15:09] Sensei
    Aye, I'll look even rougher
    if it's torn a bit.
[15:13] Sensei
    Cast off!
[15:15] Sensei
    I'll have more roughness points*
    if I'm not wearing a bottom.
[15:18] Sensei
    Take it off!
[15:21] Sensei
    Sandals on my feet, of course.
[15:22] Sensei
    They don't match, which is even better.
[15:28] God
    Impressive roughness.
[15:30] God
    I have nothing left to teach you.
[15:33] God
    I can finally die.
[15:35] Sensei
    Rough God!
[15:39] Sensei
    Hey, Umi-kun, I'm here.
[15:41] [SONG] Text
    Non-matching Sandals
[15:42] [SONG] Text
    Convenience Store Bag
[15:43] [SONG] Text
    One Cup
[15:44] [SONG] Text
    Plenty of Stains and Moth Holes
[15:45] [SONG] Text
    Torn Sleeves
[15:46] [SONG] Text
    Fried Chicken
SIGN    Dirty Glasses
[15:49] Sensei
    No!
[15:53] Sensei
    What am I lacking right now?
SIGN    I Want to See You This Summer
[15:56] Sensei
    Sexiness?
[15:59] Text
    I'll stuff things in my bra.
[16:01] Text
    And I'll wear a short skirt.
[16:03] Text
    Expose my shoulders and neckline.
[16:06] Text
    Then I might as well...
SIGN    Umi-kun.
SIGN    I'm here.
SIGN    No, that's not it!
SIGN    No, no, no, no!
SIGN    It's no use thinking by myself, it just gets weird.
SIGN    I know.
[16:27] Text
    Hello, Hio-tan?
[16:29] Hio
    What's up, Sensei-chan?
[16:31] Sensei
    Well, I don't have anything
    to wear out on my day off.
[16:34] Sensei
    I wanted you to help me.
[16:35] Hio
    Oh, I see.
[16:37] Hio
    But my sister picks out all my clothes.
[16:42] Sensei
    Oh, really?
[16:44] Hio
    Umi-chan said you're going
    to the movies tomorrow.
[16:47] Sensei
    Th-That's not what it's about.
[16:49] Hio
    Okay, hang on. I'll be right there.
[16:55] Hio
    We're here.
[16:56] Fu-girl
    Good evening.
[16:57] Kameko
    We're here to hang out.
[16:58] Sensei
    You brought them, too?
[17:00] Hio
    I thought it'd be better with more of us.
SIGN    Meeting! What does a guy want?
[17:05] Hio
    Let's begin, then.
[17:06] Sensei
    Wh-What is this?
[17:08] Hio
    Sensei-chan has dangerously low girl power.
[17:11] Hio
    At this rate, both parties could be at risk.
[17:15] Hio
    I suggest we discuss this carefully.
[17:18] Sensei
    Stop acting like Tsumorin!
[17:21] Fu-girl
    Speaking of which, Tsumorin probably
    likes this stuff. Where is she?
[17:24] Hio
    She seemed busy. She couldn't come.
[17:27] Hio
    Let us begin.
[17:29] Hio
    What does a guy want in a girl?
[17:32] Hio
    Fuga-chan.
[17:34] Fu-girl
    Me?
[17:35] ---
    Um...
SIGN    Legendary Jugs Boobs! Boobs! Boobs!
SIGN    Big boobs, maybe?
[17:47] Kameko
    Meeting adjourned.
[17:48] Sensei
    All right, go home.
[17:51] Hio
    Wh-What's wrong, everyone?
[17:52] Kameko
    You wouldn't understand
    this absolute hopelessness.
[17:57] Fu-girl
    You're right.
[17:58] Sensei
    No kidding.
[18:00] Fu-girl
    That's not true.
[18:02] Kameko
    You have more than average.
[18:04] Sensei
    I do?
[18:05] Kameko
    You know those people who don't
    notice what assets they have?
[18:09] Fu-girl
    Yeah.
[18:09] Fu-girl
    They don't even realize they're
    hurting people with their words.
[18:13] Sensei
    No, no.
[18:14] Sensei
    Talk about something else. Something else!
[18:17] Hio
    Be a guy.
[18:19] Hio
    That's how you understand a guy's feelings.
[18:21] Sensei
    B-Be a guy? But...
[18:24] Hio
    I have a plan prepared.
[18:27] Hio
    Think about a male character from a manga.
SIGN    Lump! Men's Private School
[18:29] Sensei
    From a manga? I think I could do that.
[18:36] Fu-girl
    She's a man.
[18:37] Kameko
    She's a man.
[18:39] Hio
    Man, as in manly man.
SIGN    Man
[18:43] Hio
    Now, Sensei,
[18:46] ---
    as a guy, what do you look for in a girl?
[18:50] Hio
    She's so close.
[18:52] Hio
    She actually looks like a guy
    when I look at her like this.
[18:56] Sensei
    I've never started at a
    girl like this before.
[19:00] Sensei
    I guess it comes down to boobs!
[19:07] Fu-girl
    Fine, fine, we're back to boobs.
[19:10] Kameko
    We're done.
[19:15] Sensei
    Kame-chan, you do indeed have small
    boobs, and you're dressed like a boy.
[19:20] Sensei
    But that actually brings out
    a rodent-like adorableness.
[19:24] Sensei
    And that messy hair...
    I want to do things to it.
[19:29] Sensei
    Kame-chan, do you know what "turtle"
    meant during the Meiji era?
[19:36] Kameko
    Wh-What's this?
[19:38] Kameko
    That's what they used to
    call western dog breeds.
[19:41] Kameko
    This is your destiny.
[19:45] Kameko
    There, there, see how you
    howl when I stroke you here?
[19:54] Kameko
    Fuga-chan.
[19:57] Kameko
    Your tiny body, your thin limbs,
    your small bottom.
[20:02] Kameko
    Let's go to my room and do
    nice things to each other.
[20:08] Kameko
    I still don't understand a guy's feelings.
[20:12] Kameko
    What should I do?
[20:13] Hio
    Fine, last resort.
[20:16] Hio
    Let's ask a guy.
[20:21] Umio
    What was it that you wanted?
[20:23] Hio
    Just come.
[20:25] Hio
    Right this way.
[20:29] Hio
    Maid Sensei-chan.
[20:32] Sensei
    Umi-kun.
[20:34] Umio
    What's with the outfit?
[20:35] Fu-girl
    That's not all.
[20:36] Kameko
    We're not finished yet.
[20:38] Hio
    Uniform Sensei-chan.
SIGN    Sensei
[20:40] Hio
    School swimsuit Sensei-chan.
[20:43] Hio
    Kitty-ear-furry Sensei-chan.
[20:45] Hio
    Idol Sensei-chan.
[20:50] Hio
    So, which Sensei do you like?
[20:54] Sensei
    You never told me it was Umi-kun.
[20:57] Hio
    But now we'll know what guys want.
    What Umi-chan wants.
[21:02] Hio
    Go ahead.
[21:08] Umio
    Why?
[21:10] Umio
    Why aren't you wearing your glasses?
[21:13] Umio
    Do you think your glasses are a drawback?
[21:15] Umio
    You believe that urban legend that you can't
    be a heroine if you wear glasses, don't you?
[21:19] Umio
    It's nonsense!
[21:22] Umio
    The thicker the lenses,
    the thicker the shield.
[21:24] Umio
    The longer the legs, the longer the sword.
[21:26] Umio
    A sturdy frame is your armor.
[21:28] Umio
    Glasses are your offense and your defense!
    Your heavy-duty equipment!
[21:32] Fu-girl
    Umio-kun has a glasses fetish.
[21:32] Umio
    Nay, not only your equip, your stats.
    Your abilities. Your materials!
[21:34] Hio
    I never knew.
[21:34] Umio
    The greats of the world know this to be true!
[21:41] Sensei
    Then do you...
[21:45] ---
    Th-Think I'm cute all the time?
[21:53] Umio
    Well, I—
[21:55] Umio
    Yes.
[21:56] Sensei
    Wh-Why thank you.
[21:59] All
    Yay, we did it!
[22:01] All
    Long live glasses!
SIGN    I wear glasses, too.
[22:03] G-men
    I wear glasses, too. Problem?
SIGN    Manager
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
SIGN    See you next time!
[23:44] A
    Don't catch a cold.
[23:47] [SONG] Text
    Scarf Justice
SIGN    Movie Confirmed Over 30 million copies sold!!
[23:47] [SONG] Text
    Yasuda Suzuhito
SIGN    Uma-kun's Recommendation!
    The latest volume of the movie-adapted,
     inner-child-summoning Scarf Justice!
    The wind makes the scarf even more badass!
    Look out for the turbulent comeback scarf punch galaxy!!
SIGN    See you again!
[23:50] ---
    

9 - It's Not Love / Hey, How're You Feeling? / Snowy Night

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] A
    I'm leaving, now.
[00:05] A
    Are you sure you're going to
    be okay alone for three days?
[00:08] Hio
    I'll be fine, Onee-chan.
[00:10] A
    Be sure to hang the laundry out.
[00:13] Hio
    Okay.
[00:15] A
    Bye.
[00:19] Hio
    It's cold.
[00:25] Hio
    I have the early shift at Uma today.
[00:27] Hio
    I should take a bath and wake up.
[00:33] Hio
    Oh, no. Am I catching a cold?
[00:35] Hio
    I should take some medicine.
[02:17] Kantoku
    A cold?
[02:18] Hio
    I totally have a cold,
[02:21] Hio
    so please let me take the day off.
[02:24] Hio
    I sent you proof.
[02:27] Kantoku
    You didn't have to take a picture.
[02:29] Kantoku
    All right.
[02:30] Kantoku
    Take the day off.
[02:31] Kantoku
    I'll find someone to fill your shift.
[02:33] Hio
    Thank you.
[02:37] Hio
    He didn't get angry at me.
[02:39] Hio
    Good night.
SIGN    It's Not Love
[02:50] A
    Bye.
[02:53] B
    Watch out for cars.
[02:59] C
    Good morning.
[03:00] D
    Good morning.
[03:24] Hio
    I'm getting kinda hungry.
[03:31] Hio
    Yes?
[03:34] Hio
    Who'd be here at this hour?
[03:45] Kantoku
    Hey, don't close it.
[03:47] Hio
    Why are you here, Kantoku?
[03:49] Kantoku
    I'm here to check on your cold.
[03:51] Hio
    You didn't warn me!
[03:53] Kantoku
    I texted you.
[03:54] Kantoku
    You didn't respond, so I
    got worried and came over.
[03:59] Hio
    I didn't notice.
[04:01] Kantoku
    Jeez.
[04:02] Kantoku
    I'm glad you seem well, though.
[04:05] Kantoku
    Sorry I came.
[04:06] Kantoku
    I'm leaving.
[04:08] Kantoku
    I bought some stuff that might be useful.
[04:11] Kantoku
    I'll leave it here.
[04:13] Kantoku
    Later.
[04:28] Hio
    You better leave once you're done cooking.
[04:31] Kantoku
    I know.
[04:33] Kantoku
    I have to go to work soon, anyway.
[04:35] Kantoku
    Clean your table.
[04:36] Hio
    Leave right away, please.
[04:39] Hio
    Don't leave a trace when
    you blip out of existence.
[04:41] Kantoku
    I know, I'll leave.
[04:56] Kantoku
    You're okay with shiitake mushrooms, right?
[04:58] Hio
    Yes.
[05:04] Kantoku
    Where's the salt?
[05:05] Kantoku
    There you go.
[05:23] Kantoku
    Chew well.
[05:26] Hio
    Fine, then.
[05:31] Kantoku
    You don't have chili oil, huh?
[05:33] Kantoku
    I should have bought some.
[05:35] Hio
    It's okay.
[05:37] Kantoku
    Is it good?
[05:38] Hio
    It's fine.
[05:40] Hio
    Leave once you're done eating, please.
[05:42] Kantoku
    Fine, fine.
[05:45] Hio
    I'm starting to feel warm.
[05:47] Kantoku
    I put ginger in it.
[05:49] Kantoku
    It's good when you have a cold.
[05:51] Kantoku
    Do you hate ginger?
[05:52] Hio
    Not really.
[05:56] Kantoku
    I'm going, then.
[05:58] Kantoku
    Go to the doctor's if you can walk.
[06:00] Hio
    Okay.
[06:05] Hio
    He's gone.
[06:13] Hio
    I have to hang the laundry.
[06:16] Sensei-chan
    Welcome.
[06:18] Sensei-chan
    That'll be 1,400 yen.
[06:20] Sensei-chan
    Do you have a membership card?
[06:22] Fu-girl
    I heard Hio-tan has a cold.
[06:24] Kameko
    I got a photo from the scene, too.
[06:28] Fu-girl
    I wonder if she's okay.
[06:30] Kantoku
    She sent it to everyone at Uma.
[06:32] Kantoku
    Is it really something to brag about?
[06:34] Kantoku
    Get to work, you two.
[06:36] Kantoku
    We have new books from Yonkuri.
[06:38] K; H
    Yes.
[06:41] [Messenger] Text
    How're you feeling?
[06:50] Umio
    Kantoku, is that it for orders?
[06:54] Kantoku
    Is she sleeping?
[06:56] Umio
    Kantoku.
[06:59] Kantoku
    Sorry.
[07:19] Kantoku
    Hey, Hio-tan.
[07:21] Kantoku
    It's me.
[07:30] Kantoku
    Maybe she's at the hospital or something.
[07:36] Kantoku
    Hio-tan.
[07:36] Kantoku
    Hey, Hio-tan.
[07:38] Kantoku
    Are you all right?
[07:38] Kantoku
    Hey.
[07:40] Kantoku
    Dammit.
[07:46] Kantoku
    Hio-tan!
[07:56] Kantoku
    Where's a hospital that'd be open this late?
[08:02] Kantoku
    Hio-tan.
[08:03] Kantoku
    Hang in there.
[08:13] Kantoku
    Taxi.
[08:14] [SONG] Text
    Occupied
SIGN    Crap.
[08:37] Hio
    K-Kantoku.
[08:58] Hio
    Kantoku?
[09:00] Kantoku
    You're up, Hio-tan?
[09:02] Kantoku
    You got an IV at the hospital.
[09:04] Kantoku
    You just got home.
[09:05] Hio
    The hospital?
[09:07] Hio
    Right, I collapsed.
[09:11] Hio
    And then Kantoku came.
[09:13] Hio
    And then...
[09:20] Hio
    Kantoku, what was—
[09:22] Kantoku
    Calm down, Hio-tan.
[09:24] Hio
    I'm fine now.
[09:25] Hio
    Thank you.
[09:26] Kantoku
    Hey, Hio-tan!
[09:28] Kantoku
    I'm better now. Leave, please.
[09:30] Kantoku
    Hurry. Now.
[09:30] Kantoku
    I said, "calm down."
[09:31] Hio
    Why aren't you leaving?
[09:35] Kantoku
    I broke the door; I can't lock it.
[09:37] Kantoku
    So I'll stay the night.
[09:40] Hio
    Wh-Wh-What are you talking about?
[09:42] Kantoku
    What?
[09:43] Kantoku
    It'd be dangerous to leave it open.
[09:45] Kantoku
    I broke it.
[09:46] Kantoku
    It's my responsibility.
[09:48] Kantoku
    I won't attack a sick girl.
[09:50] Kantoku
    Don't worry.
[09:51] Kantoku
    Don't get your hopes up.
[09:52] Hio
    I'm not getting my hopes up!
[09:54] Hio
    I'm fine, okay?
[09:56] Hio
    Thank you.
[09:57] Hio
    Please leave.
[09:59] Kantoku
    I refuse.
[10:00] Hio
    Wh-Why?
[10:02] Kantoku
    How could I leave you to be
    alone when you're so weak?
[10:05] Kantoku
    I'm worried for you.
[10:21] Hio
    Aren't you going to sleep, Kantoku?
[10:25] Hio
    You can sleep, you know.
[10:27] Hio
    I don't think I'll be able to fall asleep.
[10:29] Kantoku
    Don't be silly.
[10:30] Kantoku
    Hurry up and sleep so you can get better.
[10:51] Kantoku
    She actually fell asleep.
[11:34] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You're always way too defenseless.
[11:39] (Flashback) Kantoku
    It's not my fault if I finally lose control.
[11:46] Hio
    Sheesh, Kantoku, what's your problem?
[11:51] Hio
    Is it fun playing with my feelings?
[12:01] Umio
    Kantoku's taking the day off sick?
[12:03] Sensei-chan
    Thank you for waiting. Next customer, please.
[12:06] Sensei-chan
    Umi-kun, get me more bonus
    posters and folders.
[12:09] Umio
    Okay.
[12:11] Umio
    Which box is it?
[12:13] Fu-girl
    We're out of stock.
[12:14] Fu-girl
    What's going on?
[12:15] Kameko
    Yonkuri new arrivals here.
[12:17] Kameko
    We're getting complaints that there's
    role reversal fan fiction mixed in.
[12:19] Sensei-chan
    I told you not to let the
    cover art style confuse you.
[12:22] Sensei-chan
    Forget it, I'll handle it.
[12:25] Hio
    It's so much harder without Kantoku.
[12:29] Sensei-chan
    All right, let's all go check
    on Kantoku when we're done.
[12:32] All
    Yeah!
[12:33] Hio
    No.
[12:34] Hio
    You'll just spread the damage
    if you get sick, too.
[12:37] Fu-girl
    I want to have a rice soup party.
[12:39] Hio
    No.
[12:40] Hio
    Never!
[12:45] Kantoku
    Tasty.
[12:48] Sensei-chan
    What? Sick again?
[12:50] Hio
    Yeah, see, here's proof.
[12:52] Sensei-chan
    You don't have to prove it.
[12:55] Sensei-chan
    Okay, I'll be there right away.
[12:58] Sensei-chan
    All right.
SIGN    Hey, How're You Feeling?
[13:01] Sensei-chan
    Thanks for helping me carry
    all this, Sommelier-kun.
[13:05] Sensei-chan
    I've never been to Hio-tan's place before.
[13:09] Sensei-chan
    I have another reason for
    going to Hio-tan's place,
[13:11] ---
    aside from checking up on her:
[13:14] Sensei-chan
    to see the secret to her cuteness.
[13:17] Sensei-chan
    The source of her girl power.
[13:23] Sensei-chan
    Quite a few fancy houses.
[13:26] Sensei-chan
    Hio-tan must live in a nice house, too.
[13:37] Sensei-chan
    It's actually pretty old.
[13:38] Sensei-chan
    It's about as old as Sommelier-kun's.
[13:40] Sensei-chan
    Is this another rule of girl power?
[13:42] Sensei-chan
    I'll have to note it down later.
[13:46] Sensei-chan
    Hio-tan.
[13:52] Hio
    Hey, it's Sensei-chan and Sommelier-kun.
[13:55] Hio
    Thanks for coming.
[13:58] Sensei-chan
    Rule number two: wear shabby clothes at home.
[14:01] Sensei-chan
    Everything I thought I knew
    about girl power was wrong.
[14:03] Sensei-chan
    This is important.
[14:05] Hio
    Here's my room.
[14:09] Sensei-chan
    Rule number three: have a messy room.
[14:12] Sensei-chan
    Perhaps crudeness is a necessity at times.
[14:15] Sensei-chan
    Anyway, here: water and food.
[14:18] Hio
    Thanks.
[14:19] Hio
    Also, Sommelier-kun
[14:21] ---
    brought movies and manga
    for when you can't sleep.
[14:25] Hio
    Thanks.
[14:26] Sensei-chan
    How's your fever?
[14:30] Sensei-chan
    You have a really bad fever.
[14:31] Hio
    It won't go down.
[14:33] Sensei-chan
    Just get some sleep.
[14:35] Sensei-chan
    Is there anything you want me to do?
[14:39] Hio
    Can you hang the stuff that's in the washer?
[14:44] Sensei-chan
    Rule number four: put your
    washing machine outside.
[14:53] Sensei-chan
    C-Crazy underwear!
[14:55] Sensei-chan
    It hides almost nothing!
[15:02] Sensei-chan
    H?
[15:03] Sensei-chan
    A, B, C, D, E, F, G,
[15:06] Sensei-chan
    H!
[15:07] Sensei-chan
    Just how big is it?
[15:12] Sensei-chan
    It doesn't latch on anywhere.
[15:14] Sensei-chan
    This is H?
[15:20] Sensei-chan
    I've seen this in a magazine.
[15:22] Sensei-chan
    It's that fishnet that turns you into pork!
[15:24] Sensei-chan
    I've never actually touched one.
[15:27] Sensei-chan
    Wait, what's this thing?
[15:30] Sensei-chan
    It was in the washer, so that must
    mean it's something you wear.
[15:34] Sensei-chan
    Where, exactly?
[15:37] Sensei-chan
    Is it a hairband?
[15:40] Sensei-chan
    It gets in the way of my vision, but I guess
[15:43] ---
    you have to deal with it to be a fancy girl.
[15:46] Sensei-chan
    But really?
[15:50] Sensei-chan
    Hio-tan.
[15:51] Hio
    I want Hagen-Dazs.
[15:54] Sensei-chan
    She's always dressed so cute,
[15:56] Sensei-chan
    but she has a monster underneath it.
[16:00] Sensei-chan
    This is good research.
[16:02] Sensei-chan
    Beware, girl power!
[16:04] Hio
    Sensei-chan.
[16:06] Hio
    Why are you taking pictures?
[16:08] Hio
    Those are my sister's.
[16:11] Kantoku
    It is merciless. It has come again.
[16:15] Kantoku
    Are you all armed?
[16:17] All
    Yes.
[16:19] Umio
    I brought the PC version of
    the ero-game Die Heart 3.
[16:22] Kantoku
    Good. Sommelier.
[16:24] Kantoku
    An ero-hon with bonus pantsu.
[16:26] Kantoku
    Impressive.
[16:27] Kantoku
    Sensei.
[16:28] Kantoku
    Various manga for singles.
[16:30] Kantoku
    A curveball.
[16:31] Kantoku
    But not bad.
[16:33] Fu-girl
    I brought this BL comic that got chosen
[16:35] ---
    at this year's "This BL is seriously good."
[16:38] Kameko
    Singles can sleep well with this.
[16:41] Hio
    I brought a whisper CD by
    a popular voice actress.
[16:46] Kantoku
    All right, let's move out.
[16:47] All
    Hooah!
SIGN    Christmas Damage Control
SIGN    The horror
    creeps upon
    us!!
SIGN    Christmas cancellation notice
SIGN    For Singles
SIGN    Keep Santa Out
[16:53] Umio
    Beware, people!
SIGN    Snowy Night
[16:55] Umio
    A massive, powerful Christmas is approaching!
[16:58] Kameko
    Solo play is dangerous.
    Get your weapons here.
[17:03] Kameko
    Women here.
[17:06] Hio
    The Christmas corner is
    pretty strong this year.
[17:10] Fu-girl
    Yeah, it's because Kantoku's so busy
[17:13] ---
    with work that he had to cancel
    the Christmas party this year.
[17:17] Fu-girl
    He's venting steam.
[17:18] Hio
    Oh, really?
[17:24] Kantoku
    Tsumorin.
[17:27] Tsumorin
    Kan-chan.
[17:30] Kantoku
    Wh-What are you here to buy?
[17:32] Tsumorin
    Come on, the same books as always.
SIGN    1,000 ways to %^$* Santa Claus
[17:35] Tsumorin
    Damage control for Christmas alone.
[17:37] Kantoku
    Don't buy such a disturbed book.
[17:39] Kantoku
    Who shelved that book?
[17:42] Tsumorin
    What? It's all your fault!
[17:45] Kantoku
    Stop crying.
[17:46] Kantoku
    Don't drink in the store.
[17:48] A
    What's going on? That guy
    has a girl crying at him.
[17:51] Umio
    What is this, a TV drama?
[17:53] Umio
    You sure are living the life.
[17:56] Kantoku
    Umio.
[17:57] Umio
    Banish him from our paradise!
[18:01] Tsumorin
    Serves you right.
[18:02] Sensei-chan
    Master Tsumorin.
[18:04] Sensei-chan
    Long time no see.
[18:06] Sensei-chan
    I have trained hard since then,
[18:09] Sensei-chan
    but I still don't understand.
[18:15] Sensei-chan
    What is girl power?
[18:18] Tsumorin
    Sorry, Sensei-chan.
[18:20] Tsumorin
    Forget everything I said.
[18:23] Tsumorin
    Girl power won't help get the
    attention of the one you love.
[18:27] Sensei-chan
    No.
[18:30] Sensei-chan
    Then what am I supposed to do?
[18:33] Tsumorin
    Don't worry.
[18:36] Tsumorin
    You have the person you
    love in front of you.
[18:39] ---
    You're more ladylike than anyone.
[18:43] Sensei-chan
    What are you saying?
[18:46] Tsumorin
    It's so obvious.
SIGN    End of Line
[18:49] Hio
    The line ends here.
[18:51] A
    Is Santa-san coming this year, too?
[18:57] Umio
    Look out!
[19:02] Hio
    Umi-chan.
[19:03] Kantoku
    Umio's down!
[19:06] Umio
    I-I'm fine.
[19:10] Umio
    Onomi-chan
[19:11] ---
    protected me.
[19:13] Kantoku
    Damn, you scared me.
[19:18] Hio
    It's windy all of a sudden.
[19:21] Kantoku
    This wind...
[19:23] Kantoku
    No.
[19:34] Kantoku
    G-men!
[19:37] Umio
    Look at her.
[19:38] Umio
    She's so ready to enjoy Christmas.
[19:41] Kantoku
    We have an emergency.
[19:42] Kantoku
    All assemble.
[19:57] G-men
    I come today with a request.
[20:05] G-men
    These books were deemed
    unwholesome and collected by us.
[20:09] G-men
    They're scheduled for destruction.
[20:12] G-men
    They're abandoned ero-hons.
SIGN    Sexy Onii-san!!
SIGN    Vegetable Miso Picnic
[20:14] G-men
    They haven't been used once.
SIGN    Pour that hot chocolate all over me
SIGN    I come in the spirit of the season with
SIGN    In the Windy City
[20:19] ---
    the hopes that they might be used even once.
SIGN    I trust that you would use them.
SIGN    That you would make their lives complete.
[20:31] B
    You're giving us these books?
[20:35] G-men
    And I want you to know
    that there are many books
[20:38] ---
    that do not follow the rules,
    and are collected and destroyed.
[20:42] G-men
    I don't want to see such
    tragic ero-hons being born.
[20:45] G-men
    I want them to follow the rules.
[20:57] Kantoku
    Direct the line-up.
[20:59] Umio
    But it won't earn us profits.
[21:01] Kantoku
    Just do it, now.
[21:02] Umio
    O-Okay.
[21:04] Umio
    Please line up single file.
[21:07] Kameko
    We're beginning the distribution.
SIGN    I Love Lolis!
SIGN    Adult
[21:13] A
    I'll use it like it's my own daughter.
[21:18] B
    This book was taken away;
    I thought I'd never get it.
SIGN    Miko Tales
SIGN    Adult
SIGN    1,000 Ways to Get a Hot Guy's Attention
[21:29] Tsumorin
    Thanks.
[21:33] C
    I'm glad I lived so long.
[21:36] D
    This turtle's just like yours, Dad.
[21:40] E
    It used to be an elephant.
[21:47] Kantoku
    This is totally an obstruction of business.
[21:50] G-men
    Well then, everyone, Merry Christmas.
[21:59] All
    Merry Erostmas!
SIGN    Manager
[23:37] Umio
    They say that Valentine's day is the memorial
    of the Roman Bishop Saint Valentine.
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
[23:40] Umio
    There is a tradition of giving
    gifts to those you care about.
SIGN    See you next time!
[23:42] Umio
    In Japan, there's a
    conspiracy amongst snack
[23:44] ---
    manufacturers to make women
    give men chocolates, apparently.
SIGN    Illustration: Ito Life
SIGN    See you again!
[23:50] ---
    

10 - Wonderful Chocolate / Chocolate Philosophy / Kantoku's Overflowing White Chocolate

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:10] Sensei
    Good, I didn't forget this year.
[00:17] Sensei
    This year.
[00:19] Sensei
    I'll do it.
[00:26] Tsumorin
    Sensei-chan.
[00:28] Tsumorin
    Sensei-chan.
[00:31] Tsumorin
    Sensei-chan, are you there?
[00:34] Tsumorin
    It's open.
[00:44] Tsumorin
    Sensei-chan!
[00:46] Tsumorin
    What's wrong?
[00:47] Tsumorin
    Are you all right?
[00:48] Tsumorin
    Get a grip.
[00:51] Tsumorin
    This...
[00:53] Tsumorin
    Girl power scouter!
[00:56] Tsumorin
    Her girl power is so low.
[00:58] Tsumorin
    She must have tried to make
    chocolates by herself.
[01:02] Sensei
    I was no match for it.
[01:11] Tsumorin
    Sensei-chan!
[02:44] Tsumorin
    So,
[02:46] ---
    Tsumorin's Valentine's Snack Class. Here we go!
[02:50] All
    Clap, clap, clap.
[02:53] Tsumorin
    Today, we'll be making gâteau au chocolat.
[02:56] Tsumorin
    It's dangerous to make chocolates
    with low girl power.
[02:59] Tsumorin
    Please cook properly and safely.
[03:02] All
    Okay.
SIGN    Handmade
[03:04] Tsumorin
    First, we'll crush the chocolate.
[03:06] Fu-girl
    Die!
[03:08] Tsumorin
    Be sure you wrap it in
    a bag before you hit it.
[03:12] Fu-girl
    Right, sorry.
[03:13] Tsumorin
    I thought this might happen,
    so I prepared crushed chocolate.
[03:18] Tsumorin
    Next, we're going to put it in hot water.
[03:21] Tsumorin
    Nope, that's not right.
[03:23] Tsumorin
    Let's use this pre-melted chocolate.
[03:28] Tsumorin
    Next, we're going to whip the dairy
    cream until it stands on end.
[03:35] Tsumorin
    Nope, that's too much.
[03:36] Tsumorin
    Let's wash the decorative strawberries.
[03:36] [SONG] Text
    Whipped
[03:39] Kameko
    Tsumorin! Oh, no!
[03:41] Kameko
    The strawberries have
    vanished without a trace.
[03:44] Tsumorin
    Oh, didn't you know?
[03:46] ---
    That's what happens when you eat them.
[03:48] Tsumorin
    Well, what can we do?
[03:50] Tsumorin
    Okay, Sensei-chan, could you go
    buy us some more strawberries?
[03:55] Tsumorin
    Let's whip the egg whites
    and sugar to make meringue.
[04:00] Hio
    Am I doing it right?
[04:02] Tsumorin
    You're doing it wrong.
[04:03] Sensei
    I'm back with the groceries.
[04:04] Tsumorin
    Thank you.
[04:05] Sensei
    Here.
SIGN    Bean Sprouts
[04:06] Tsumorin
    Unfortunately, these are bean sprouts.
SIGN    Local Supermarket T
     Strawberries 1 pack = 398 yen
[04:08] Sensei
    I'm sorry. It was 398 yen for a pack of strawberries.
[04:11] Sensei
    I couldn't shake the guilt.
[04:13] Tsumorin
    I asked too much of you.
[04:15] Tsumorin
    It's all right, let's move
    on without strawberries.
[04:18] Tsumorin
    Fuga-chan, did you make the
    chocolate decoration to go on top?
[04:21] Fu-girl
    Yes, something like this?
[04:23] Tsumorin
    That's a masterpiece.
[04:25] Tsumorin
    But it won't work on cake, so nope.
[04:27] Tsumorin
    Break it down, please.
[04:28] Fu-girl
    Okay.
[04:31] Tsumorin
    You're having a good time.
[04:33] Tsumorin
    And now for the climax.
[04:35] Tsumorin
    Careful not to lose your marbles.
[04:38] Tsumorin
    Mix the meringue, cake flour,
[04:39] ---
    cocoa and chocolate, and put it in the mold.
[04:42] Tsumorin
    Bake it in an oven pre-heated to 180 Celsius.
[04:45] Tsumorin
    This part is very dangerous, so be careful.
[04:48] All
    Okay.
[04:49] All
    I got the oven.
[04:51] All
    I'll put it in the oven.
[04:53] All
    Sensei-chan, wait.
[05:03] All
    My glasses!
[05:04] All
    My glasses are steamed up!
[05:05] All
    My eyes, my eyes!
[05:07] Tsumorin
    It's a steamer; be careful.
[05:12] Hio
    It's baked.
[05:13] Kameko
    It smells good.
[05:15] Fu-girl
    Wow.
[05:15] Sensei
    We could charge money for this.
[05:17] Tsumorin
    Sprinkle some powdered sugar,
[05:19] ---
    and done.
[05:21] Tsumorin
    This'll be enough to get you
    all through Valentine's right?
[05:25] All
    Let's eat.
[05:35] All
    It's so good!
[05:40] Hio
    It melts in my mouth.
[05:42] Sensei
    And it's crunchy on the outside.
[05:43] Fu-girl
    We could make a shop.
[05:45] Kameko
    I can't stop.
[05:47] Tsumorin
    It really is good.
[05:50] Tsumorin
    This is the best I've made in ten years.
[05:53] Sensei
    Master Tsumorin.
[05:55] Sensei
    Thank you.
[05:58] Sensei
    I could have never made something
    this delicious myself.
[06:02] Tsumorin
    But the real battle's about to begin.
[06:05] ---
    It's harder to give chocolates than it
    is to make them on Valentine's Day.
[06:09] Tsumorin
    Good luck.
[06:11] Sensei
    F-Fank you!
[06:14] Tsumorin
    Okay, let's cutely wrap the cakes.
[06:17] ---
    Okay!
[06:23] Tsumorin
    To think it was so good
    that we ate all of it.
SIGN    Wonderful Chocolate
[06:35] Sensei
    H-Hey, Umi-kun...
[06:36] Umio
    Yes?
[06:38] Umio
    What is it, Sensei-san?
[06:40] ---
    U-Um...
[06:41] Sensei
    Well, you see...
[06:44] Umio
    Yes?
[06:45] Sensei
    I, um, y'know...
[06:48] Umio
    What is it?
[06:50] Sensei
    I— Can you have the chocolate I made?
[06:55] Umio
    Really? Thank you.
[06:57] Umio
    It's so good.
[06:58] Umio
    It's good, Sensei-san.
[07:00] Sensei
    Make this for me every morning
    from now on, will you?
[07:06] Umio
    What's wrong with you?
[07:07] Umio
    You're creeping me out, Sensei-san.
[07:09] Sensei
    Oh, that's not it.
[07:11] ---
    Um...
[07:12] Sensei
    I-I-I— I-I-I-I-Idiot!
[07:16] Umio
    Sensei-san.
[07:19] Sensei
    I can't. I can't say it.
SIGN    Elementary School
[07:23] Sensei
    Nothing's ever happened for me until now.
SIGN    Middle School
[07:26] Text
    I couldn't possibly do Valentine's
    for the first time at this age.
SIGN    High School
[07:29] Sensei
    But
[07:31] ---
    I don't want to run anymore.
[07:35] Sensei
    Umi-kun.
[07:36] Umio
    Y-Yes?
[07:37] Sensei
    I want to—
[07:42] Sensei
    I can't say it.
[07:44] Umio
    Wh-What are you—
[07:46] Sensei
    Sorry.
[07:48] Sensei
    How much of a wuss am I that
    I can't even give chocolate?
[07:53] Umio
    Chocolate?
[07:54] Sensei
    I didn't mean to say that out loud.
[07:56] Umio
    Right, it's Valentine's Day.
[07:59] Umio
    Sensei-san, did you make me chocolate?
[08:06] Sensei
    Get over yourself, stupid!
[08:09] Umio
    I'm so stupid.
SIGN    Break Room
[08:24] Tsumorin
    Kame-chan.
[08:26] Kameko
    Tsumorin.
[08:28] Tsumorin
    I got worried about you guys.
[08:30] Tsumorin
    Huh?
[08:33] Tsumorin
    You still haven't given yours?
[08:36] Kameko
    I'm sure it'd only trouble him.
[08:41] Kameko
    Everyone has someone they like.
SIGN    We Love Boobs After All!!
SIGN    My Neighbor Mammaries
SIGN    They're
[08:46] ---
    slowly starting to catch on.
SIGN    I couldn't butt in.
SIGN    It's not my place to.
SIGN    So I
[09:05] ---
    just watch from afar.
SIGN    I'm content being a record keeper.
SIGN    I'm happier watching than getting caught-up and hurt.
SIGN    S-Stop it!
SIGN    My hair... My hair's gonna explode!
SIGN    You're so mean.
SIGN    You act like you know what's going on...
SIGN    But you haven't even tried. You can't give up yet.
SIGN    So what if it'll trouble him? Give him lots of trouble.
[09:42] Kameko
    Thanks, Tsumorin.
[09:47] Kameko
    Hey, Tsumorin.
[09:50] ---
    Umm...
[09:52] Kameko
    I have a request.
[09:54] Tsumorin
    Sure, anything.
[09:57] Kameko
    This.
[10:06] Kantoku
    Hey, Kameko, what's up?
[10:28] Tsumorin
    Me, too, then.
[10:34] Tsumorin
    Maybe I'll go trouble him, as well.
SIGN    Graduation Special
SIGN    Tan-colored Room
SIGN    Thank you for everything this year
SIGN    Thank you,
    goodbye
SIGN    Kantoku's Overflowing
    White Chocolate
SIGN    White (Milk) Day
[10:51] Sensei
    Oh, yeah. It's White Day today.
[10:57] Umio
    Yo, Sensei, lick my candies.
[11:02] Umio
    Fu Girl-san, Senpai.
[11:05] Umio
    In return for Valentine's Day.
[11:07] Hio
    It's so cute.
[11:09] Hio
    I enjoyed your chocolates.
[11:12] Hio
    Really? That's good. Thanks.
[11:15] Hio
    That zombie chocolate was
    impressive, Fu Girl-san.
[11:18] Fu-girl
    Th-Thank you.
[11:19] Hio
    Umi-chan's so considerate.
[11:22] Hio
    Kameko-san.
[11:24] Hio
    For White Day.
[11:25] Kameko
    Thank you.
[11:32] Umio
    I don't have one for you.
[11:33] ---
    D'oh!
[11:34] Sensei
    Wh-Why not?
[11:36] Umio
    You didn't give me one.
[11:39] Sensei
    Well yeah, but...
[11:46] Sensei
    Fuga-chan, a zombie!
[12:00] Kameko
    This is epic!
[12:04] Hio
    What's that? It's cute.
[12:07] Kameko
    This?
[12:10] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Here, a present.
[12:15] (Flashback) Kameko
    Hey, what exactly is going on?
[12:18] (Flashback) Kantoku
    It's White Day today.
[12:20] (Flashback) Kantoku
    I'm reciprocating.
[12:23] (Flashback) Kameko
    You? Reciprocating? It's going to snow.
[12:28] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You're rude, aren't you?
[12:30] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Sorry it's such a simple gift idea.
[12:33] (Flashback) Kantoku
    I don't really know what
    to do in these situations.
[12:36] Kameko
    Kantoku doesn't think anything
    of giving me something like this.
[12:41] Kameko
    Maybe I'm being too negative.
[12:45] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Was that a bit weird?
[12:47] (Flashback) Kameko
    No, I'm happy.
[12:49] (Flashback) Kameko
    It's a family treasure,
[12:51] (Flashback) ---
    I'll put it on my home shrine
    and pray to it every day.
[12:52] (Flashback) Kantoku
    You don't need to go that far.
[12:58] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Here.
[12:59] (Flashback) Kantoku
    That's about right.
[13:01] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Break time's up.
[13:03] (Flashback) Kantoku
    Later.
[13:13] Kantoku
    This is my
[13:17] ---
    treasure.
[13:19] Umio
    I actually brought yours, Sensei.
[13:23] Sensei
    S-Sorry, Umi-kun.
[13:26] Kantoku
    All right, everyone,
[13:28] ---
    you can head home once
    you're done un-shelving.
[13:31] All
    Okay.
[13:33] Umio
    Good work today.
[13:35] Fu-girl
    Good work.
[13:36] Kameko
    Good work.
[13:38] Hio
    Yay, done.
[13:40] Kantoku
    I'm done for the day, too.
     Man, I'm so tired.
[13:43] Hio
    We should go home, too, then.
[13:47] Kantoku
    Yes, Umanohone here.
[13:50] Kantoku
    Oh, thank you for your business.
[13:51] Kantoku
    Yes.
[13:52] Kantoku
    Yes.
[13:53] Kantoku
    What? Add stock for tomorrow's new books?
[13:56] Kantoku
    Thank you.
[13:59] Kantoku
    Yes, bye.
[14:02] Hio
    We're setting up now?
[14:04] Kantoku
    You can go home, Hio-tan.
[14:06] Kantoku
    Manager and I will do it.
[14:09] Hio
    I already overheard, though.
[14:11] Hio
    I'll help.
[14:13] Hio
    Jeez.
[14:14] Hio
    You can't do anything without me.
[14:15] Kantoku
    She has a strong sense of
    responsibility at times like these.

[14:18] Kantoku
    All right, let's go to the corner
    store before we start work.
[14:20] Hio
    Okay.
[14:22] Kantoku
    It's on me. Leave your stuff here.
[14:26] Hio
    Really?
[14:29] Kantoku
    I think that's way too much.
[14:31] Hio
    I can handle it.
[14:33] Kantoku
    You'll get fat.
[14:34] Hio
    I can't hear you.
[14:36] Kantoku
    Hear me!
[14:42] Kantoku
    Huh?
[14:43] Hio
    What's wrong?
[14:45] Kantoku
    I think Manager locked
    the store and went home.
[14:48] Hio
    No way.
[14:49] Hio
    My entire fortune is in the store.
SIGN    The Little Haagen Dazs Girl
[14:52] Hio
    I'll have to make a living
    selling this ice cream.
[14:55] Kantoku
    Calm down, Hio-tan.
[14:57] Kantoku
    Yes, yes, yes.
[15:01] Kantoku
    Huh? You're already home?
[15:04] Kantoku
    Yes, so anyway, thanks.
[15:08] Kantoku
    Yes, goodbye.
[15:11] Kantoku
    Manager says he'll come to open the
    door first thing in the morning.
[15:13] Hio
    Morning? Really?
[15:15] Hio
    What should I do?
[15:16] Hio
    There are no more trains,
    and I live pretty far.
[15:20] Kantoku
    Guess it can't be helped.
SIGN    Caught You On a Sleepless Night
[15:27] Hio
    Why aren't the private rooms open?
[15:29] Kantoku
    There's a popular ero-game
    that's going on sale today.
[15:32] Kantoku
    There must be a lot of people going
[15:34] ---
    home from the midnight sale
    or lining up until morning.
[15:37] Hio
    Really?
[15:39] Hio
    I wonder if they thought we were a couple.
[15:51] Kantoku
    We have work early in the morning.
[15:52] Kantoku
    Go to sleep.
[15:53] Hio
    Speak for yourself.
[15:55] Kantoku
    I'll be fine.
[15:57] Hio
    I'm not sleepy, either.
[15:59] Kantoku
    Liar.
[16:01] Hio
    I'll go find something to drink.
[16:03] Hio
    What would you like?
[16:05] Kantoku
    Coffee, then, please.
[16:07] Hio
    You don't intend to sleep, do you?
[16:10] Kantoku
    What about you?
[16:12] Hio
    I'll have coffee, too.
[16:14] Kantoku
    Sleep, damn it!
[16:20] Kantoku
    Thanks.
[16:26] Kantoku
    A-Are you okay?!
[16:28] Hio
    It's hot...
[16:30] Kantoku
    That took a while.
[16:31] Hio
    Sorry, I—
[16:32] Kantoku
    It's fine. Go wash up before it stains.
[16:36] Kantoku
    There's a shower room here.
[16:38] Hio
    Okay.
[16:40] Hio
    But I don't have anything else.
[16:44] Hio
    Why are you undressing?
[16:48] Kantoku
    Here.
[16:49] Kantoku
    Wear my clothes.
[16:57] Hio
    I really don't know what Kantoku's thinking.
[17:02] Hio
    What's he doing?
[17:03] Hio
    Is he sincere? Is it calculated?
[17:06] Hio
    Damn it, Kantoku, you idiot.
[17:11] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    You knew about my feelings, huh?
[17:13] (Flashback) Hio
    Sorry, I overheard you at the hot springs.
[17:17] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    I see.
[17:18] (Flashback) Hio
    So why do you always help me out?
[17:24] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    Because I want to give up, I think.
[17:28] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    I know I have to give up, now.
[17:32] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    But Kan-chan's too nice.
[17:34] (Flashback) ---
    He doesn't let me give up.
[17:37] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    Seriously, that guy's terrible.
[17:40] (Flashback) Hio
    Calm down, Tsumorin.
[17:43] (Flashback) Hio
    But if you like Kantoku so
    much, maybe I shouldn't—
[17:47] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    No.
[17:50] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    You're not allowed to pass him up.
[17:52] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    You'd be letting my advice go to waste.
[17:55] (Flashback) Hio
    But I don't
[17:59] (Flashback) ---
    know yet.
[18:02] (Flashback) Tsumorin
    It's okay.
[18:04] Tsumorin
    Kan-chan is...
[18:22] Hio
    It smells like Kantoku.
[18:29] Kantoku
    You're back, Hio-tan.
[18:31] Hio
    Yes.
[18:32] Hio
    Aren't you going to take a shower, Kantoku?
[18:35] Kantoku
    I'll be fine.
[18:42] Hio
    Kantoku, your clothes,
[18:44] ---
    they stink.
[18:45] Kantoku
    Seriously?
[18:46] Kantoku
    I'm hurt.
[18:58] Kantoku
    Hey, Hio-tan.
[18:59] Hio
    What is it?
[19:01] Kantoku
    You're too defenseless.
[19:05] Hio
    So what if I am?
[19:12] Kantoku
    This.
[19:16] Hio
    I-I'll be fine.
[19:20] Hio
    The Kantoku I know
[19:24] ---
    would wait until I have an answer.
[19:33] Kantoku
    What do you know about me?
[19:37] Kantoku
    I'm going to sleep.
[19:40] Kantoku
    Night.
[19:42] Hio
    Good night.
[19:54] Hio
    That surprised me.
[19:56] Hio
    I was a bit scared.
[19:58] Hio
    Kantoku, you idiot.
[20:00] Hio
    How can I sleep now?
[20:09] Kantoku
    All right, let's do it.
[20:10] Hio
    Okay.
[20:11] Kantoku
    Lay out the new books and
    make room in the process.
[20:14] Kantoku
    Make towers out of the flat-pile
    books to make more space.
[20:17] Hio
    Okay.
[20:18] Kantoku
    Stack the side-stack books vertically, too.
[20:20] Kantoku
    Got it?
[20:21] Hio
    Yes.
SIGN    Manager's Pick!
SIGN    Bonus!
SIGN    Anime confirmed!!
SIGN    Newest volume: 21
[20:30] Hio
    Good work, Kantoku-san, dear.
[20:34] Kantoku
    You did well, Hio-tan.
[20:39] Tsumorin
    Hello.
[20:40] Tsumorin
    I brought snacks.
[20:43] Tsumorin
    Are you both going home?
[20:45] Kantoku
    You're always so helpful, Tsumorin.
[20:47] Hio
    Thank you, thank you.
[20:50] Tsumorin
    You're both so old.
[20:52] Tsumorin
    Good work.
[20:54] Kantoku
    Shall we get going?
[20:56] Hio
    Yes, let us go home.
[20:58] Tsumorin
    Are they going to be okay?
[21:28] Tsumorin
    I could tell instantly.
[21:31] Tsumorin
    Those two are going to be okay, now.
[21:34] Tsumorin
    I'm an awful woman.
[21:37] Tsumorin
    I was pretending to give advice,
[21:40] ---
    but I was actually just using them.
[21:43] Tsumorin
    But...
[21:53] ---
    now I can
[21:57] ---
    finally give up.
SIGN    Manager
[23:37] Tsumorin
    A girl dreams. Of a beautiful first kiss,
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
[23:40] ---
    of a romantic, dream-like, heart-pounding,
    feeling like being in heaven.
SIGN    See you next time!
[23:44] Tsumorin
    I remember I used to, too.
SIGN    Prince of the Shuttlecock
SIGN    Illustration: Sumeragi Kohaku
SIGN    Uma-kun's Recommendation!
SIGN    They're almost more than friends,
    but they're not. The definitive edition
    of the stylish badminton manga!
    The boomerang slash gets countered
    by his rival's new secret technique!
     My pulsating shuttlecock has 109 gears!
SIGN    Look for this next week!? See you again!

11 - Starting Young / Life, Exposed / The Lips

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:13] G-men
    I have lessons as soon as I get home.
[00:16] (Flashback) Mom
    This is all for your sake.
[00:18] (Flashback) Mom
    Study hard, and become a good civil servant.
[00:25] G-men
    I don't want to go home.
[00:27] A
    Oh, awesome!
[00:35] FBI
    I never knew it's like this.
[00:37] C
    Seriously?
[00:40] G-men
    Those boys are in my class.
[00:43] G-men
    What're they doing?
[00:45] A
    I can't believe you found all these
    high-quality books of the kind we like.
[00:49] FBI
    You're so amazing.
SIGN    Precocious
[00:51] A
    Okay, from now on,
    we're calling you "Sommelier."
[02:27] A
    "Sommelier," that's perfect.
[02:29] FBI
    Yeah.
[02:34] G-men
    Pervy books.
[02:36] G-men
    Onii-chan's reading them all the time.
[02:39] G-men
    But why do boys like them?
[02:42] G-men
    I hate pervy books.
[02:46] A
    Who's there?
[02:48] FBI
    It's the class rep.
[02:49] FBI
    Catch her!
[03:02] A
    Be quiet.
[03:05] A
    Stop squirming.
[03:08] G-men
    Let me go.
[03:10] G-men
    I'll tell Sensei.
[03:12] FBI
    What are we going to do with her?
[03:14] A
    It's the class rep, of all people.
[03:19] G-men
    Wh-What are you going to do to me?
[03:24] G-men
    A-Are you going silence me?
[03:28] G-men
    No!
SIGN    Mature Woman
[03:34] G-men
    What? Are you trying to negotiate with me?
[03:37] G-men
    I don't want that.
[03:39] G-men
    I hate pervy books.
[03:44] G-men
    I said, "I don't want it."
SIGN    Huge Boobs
SIGN    Here come the boobs!! Boobs!!
[03:46] G-men
    I still don't want it.
SIGN    Prince of the Shuttlecock
[03:49] G-men
    I hate pervy—
SIGN    Prince of the Shuttlecock
[03:53] G-men
    It's that tennis manga I like.
[03:58] G-men
    But I've never seen this cover.
[04:01] G-men
    Is it a special?
[04:05] G-men
    I want to see it.
[04:07] G-men
    Fine.
[04:08] G-men
    I won't tell Sensei.
[04:12] All
    Yay!
[04:13] G-men
    But in exchange,
[04:15] ---
    can you do something for me?
SIGN    Starting Young
[04:24] FBI
    The password.
[04:25] FBI
    The Wind...
[04:26] G-men
    Valley.
[04:28] FBI
    Good, come in.
[04:30] FBI
    Class rep, did you bring the stuff?
[04:33] G-men
    Yeah.
[04:36] G-men
    The books that Onii-chan threw out.
[04:38] FBI
    You brought plenty.
[04:44] FBI
    Sommelier, your thoughts?
SIGN    Tiny Boobs
[04:50] A
    Sommelier approves!
[04:51] FBI
    You're in.
[04:54] G-men
    Thanks.
[05:09] FBI
    Sommelier's had a good hunt, too.
[05:11] G-men
    Let's see what we got.
SIGN    Pretty Kimonos
[05:15] FBI
    My catch sucks.
[05:16] FBI
    It's all women's magazines.
[05:20] A
    Sommelier made a huge find.
[05:23] A
    He's good.
[05:46] A
    Damn.
[06:00] G-men
    Is it just you, Sommelier-kun?
[06:22] G-men
    Did you think I wouldn't be here either?
[06:24] G-men
    It's raining hard, after all.
[06:26] G-men
    But I'm here.
[06:28] G-men
    I can't come here after—
[06:34] G-men
    No. It's nothing.
[06:38] G-men
    We haven't had many new books.
[06:40] G-men
    We're running out.
[06:44] G-men
    This?
[06:46] G-men
    It's the one you showed me first.
[06:49] G-men
    My favorite.
[06:57] G-men
    This is...
[06:59] ---
    an underground storage?
[07:01] G-men
    Your treasure trove, huh?
[07:03] G-men
    Do the other two not know?
[07:07] G-men
    Then it's our secret.
[07:10] G-men
    Then in exchange...
[07:17] G-men
    I actually wear glasses.
[07:21] G-men
    You're not surprised?
[07:23] G-men
    I've been keeping it a secret at school.
[07:25] G-men
    Something else, then. I know!
[07:29] G-men
    I'll bring some of Onii-chan's
    crazy books tomorrow.
[07:34] G-men
    Look forward to it.
[07:40] Teacher
    Apparently some of my students have
    been hanging out in an empty home.
[07:44] Teacher
    I'm told they have some
    objectionable books with them.
[07:47] Teacher
    I'm going to do a surprise inspection.
[07:50] Teacher
    Put your bags on your desk.
[07:53] G-men
    No way, we're busted.
[07:55] G-men
    That crazy book I'm giving to
    Sommelier-kun is in my bag.
SIGN    Doeraimon
[08:00] Teacher
    All right, good.
[08:05] Teacher
    All right.
[08:11] Teacher
    All right, okay.
[08:22] Teacher
    This is despicable.
[08:24] Teacher
    I'm taking this.
[08:26] Teacher
    Come to the staff office.
[08:39] G-men
    Sommelier-kun defended me.
[08:42] G-men
    They know the secret of the shed.
[08:44] G-men
    It's only a matter of time
    before they clean it out.
[08:47] G-men
    I have to...
[08:48] ---
    I have to at least...
[08:59] G-men
    I have to at least protect these
    books that Sommelier-kun left me.
[09:05] G-men
    They're already here.
[09:08] A
    Anyone here?
[09:12] G-men
    Hurry up and go.
[09:15] Teacher
    No, actually, I'm not angry at all.
[09:18] Teacher
    It's normal at your age.
[09:21] Teacher
    I did it, too.
[09:24] Teacher
    But don't go into that house anymore.
[09:28] Teacher
    That house is being torn down today.
[09:39] G-men
    What?
[09:40] G-men
    What's going on?
[09:48] G-men
    It won't open.
[09:58] G-men
    The treasure.
[10:00] G-men
    It's over.
[10:06] G-men
    Help me—
[10:11] A
    Stop, stop!
[10:13] A
    A kid just ran in there.
[10:18] G-men
    Sorry, Sommelier-kun.
[10:21] G-men
    I couldn't protect them.
[10:24] G-men
    I couldn't protect the ero-books.
[10:28] G-men
    I'm sorry.
[10:43] G-men
    One last thing I can do.
[10:47] (Flashback) Teacher
    I know this is sudden,
[10:49] (Flashback) ---
    but she's moving away for
    her father's work reasons.
[10:57] G-men
    I wanted to protect the treasure,
[11:03] G-men
    but I couldn't.
SIGN    For Sale
[11:13] G-men
    Oh, yeah. Sommelier-kun, here.
SIGN    Doeraimon
[11:23] G-men
    Well, bye-bye.
SIGN    Beards, Romance, Love
[11:54] G-men
    I love it.
[11:59] G-men
    I love ero-books!
[12:08] G-men
    When I grow up, I'm going to be
    a person that protects ero-books.
[12:15] G-men
    So show me more ero-books when
    we grow up, Sommelier-kun.
SIGN    Prince of the Shuttlecock
[12:47] G-men
    Time to break a leg.
[13:07] Tsumorin
    Good morning. Tsumorin here.
[13:09] Tsumorin
    Today, we're here at Sensei-chan's
    home to check her girl power.
[13:13] Tsumorin
    It'll be dangerous reporting,
    but we'll get as close as we can.
[13:18] Tsumorin
    Sensei-chan appears to be sleeping, still.
[13:23] Tsumorin
    Her wake-up alarm is ringing.
[13:24] Tsumorin
    It's time to wake up.
[13:27] Tsumorin
    What's this? She's not reacting.
[13:30] Tsumorin
    She's completely unresponsive
    to the growing noise.
[13:34] Tsumorin
    She's still not waking up.
[13:36] Tsumorin
    How far will this go?
[13:42] Tsumorin
    Two hours have already passed.
[13:46] Tsumorin
    She's waking up.
[13:48] Tsumorin
    Finally, she's getting up!
[13:49] Tsumorin
    This is good footage.
SIGN    12 PM Oversleep time: 3:58:42
[13:56] Tsumorin
    And now she's self-loathing.
[13:58] Tsumorin
    The weight of having overslept by
    four hours bears heavily upon her.
[14:02] Hio-tan
    She's getting ready to go out.
[14:04] Tsumorin
    She's gathering her work tools.
[14:06] Tsumorin
    Statistically, she'll likely be going
    to the family restaurant.
[14:09] Hio-tan
    Why the family restaurant?
[14:11] Tsumorin
    The lack of distractions
    helps her focus on work.
[14:15] Tsumorin
    I often do the same thing.
[14:18] Tsumorin
    Crikey!
[14:19] Tsumorin
    What's this?!
[14:21] Tsumorin
    She's eating. She's eating before
    she goes to the family restaurant.
[14:24] Tsumorin
    How could this be?
[14:26] Hio-tan
    What could this mean?
[14:28] Tsumorin
    Food is expensive at the family restaurant.
[14:31] Tsumorin
    Therefore, she eats at home to save money.
[14:33] Tsumorin
    I often do the same, too.
[14:37] Sensei
    Thanks for the food.
[14:42] Tsumorin
    Oh my, she's putting the ramen soup into
    the fridge instead of throwing it out.
[14:45] Tsumorin
    She's sustainable.
[14:46] Tsumorin
    She's sustainable.
[14:47] Hio-tan
    What exactly is going on?
[14:49] Tsumorin
    That ramen is one of the more
    expensive instant ramens.
[14:53] Tsumorin
    She'll keep the soup and cook
    noodles separately later.
[14:56] Tsumorin
    I often did that, too.
[15:00] Tsumorin
    And she's leaving the house.
[15:06] Tsumorin
    She's entering the family
    restaurant, as we suspected.
[15:07] Tsumorin
    And her order?
[15:09] Tsumorin
    Drinks only, of course.
[15:11] Tsumorin
    She has the basics down pat.
SIGN    1 hour later
[15:19] Tsumorin
    She's unwavering.
[15:21] Tsumorin
    A steady poise.
SIGN    3 hours later
[15:28] Tsumorin
    Oh?
[15:29] Tsumorin
    Now she's eyeing the dessert menu.
[15:31] Tsumorin
    But she holds back.
SIGN    5 hours later
[15:37] Hio-tan
    She has amazing concentration.
[15:39] Tsumorin
    Her record continues to grow.
SIGN    8 hours 45 minutes later
[15:48] Tsumorin
    Look, she's about to give in.
[15:51] Tsumorin
    She's staring at the menu.
[15:56] Hio-tan
    What's going on?
[15:57] Tsumorin
    Orders past 10 PM become
    expensive with late-night fees.
[16:02] Tsumorin
    She's better off eating
    now rather than later.
[16:05] Tsumorin
    It's a trap!
[16:06] Hio-tan
    That's a trap?
[16:08] Tsumorin
    I call it the Ten-o-Clock Wall.
[16:10] Tsumorin
    She fought it admirably with
    only the drink bar to help her.
[16:12] Tsumorin
    She's already set enough of a record.
[16:14] Tsumorin
    She could finish it off.
[16:16] Tsumorin
    I-Impossible.
[16:20] Tsumorin
    She resisted.
[16:21] Tsumorin
    She resisted.
[16:23] Tsumorin
    What drives her to do this?
[16:25] Tsumorin
    There's only one answer.
[16:26] Tsumorin
    Her wallet speaks!
[16:30] Tsumorin
    And she immerses herself in work,
    as if to shrug away her misery.
SIGN    I like you
[16:37] Tsumorin
    The manuscript is complete!
[16:38] Hio-tan
    She did it!
[16:40] Tsumorin
    But she might buy sweets
    to congratulate herself.
SIGN    Time spent using only the drink bar:
[16:44] Tsumorin
    No! She has a will of steel!
SIGN    She leaves without a hitch!
SIGN    An amazing record.
SIGN    But don't imitate this.
SIGN    She safely arrives home.
SIGN    The first thing she does?
SIGN    Ramen!
SIGN    With the soup from lunch!
SIGN    Life, Exposed
[17:21] Tsumorin
    That concludes the Sensei-chan Report.
[17:22] Tsumorin
    You mean your spying!
SIGN    The Lips
[17:28] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun.
[17:34] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun.
[17:37] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun.
[17:41] Fu-girl
    I'm over here.
[17:43] Fu-girl
    You're so awful, how could you not notice?
[17:47] Fu-girl
    Kantoku's asking you to come to
    the storage when you're done here.
[17:57] Fu-girl
    Just because I'm small, he doesn't notice me.
[18:00] Fu-girl
    He's awful.
[18:02] Hio-tan
    What's wrong? Why are you sighing?
[18:05] Hio-tan
    You're going to let your happiness out.
[18:07] Fu-girl
    He won't even see me if I don't get bigger.
[18:10] Fu-girl
    Like, I'm not even in his field of view.
SIGN    Jugs
[18:23] Text
    I need to get bigger, or he won't even see.
SIGN    Fuga-chan, let's go for lunch—
SIGN    What's wrong, Fuga-chan?
[18:34] Hio-tan
    I see.
[18:37] Hio-tan
    I see.
[18:38] Hio-tan
    You want to get bigger.
[18:43] Hio-tan
    You have to eat lots and sleep well.
[18:46] Hio-tan
    But you can't grow right away.
[18:51] Hio-tan
    Oh, I know.
[18:52] Hio-tan
    Let's get Umi-chan to help.
[18:57] Hio-tan
    Sommelier-kun.
[19:03] Hio-tan
    Tada.
[19:06] Hio-tan
    It's not the Sommelier Tank,
    it's the Umi-chan Tank!
[19:10] Hio-tan
    Now Sommelier won't overlook Fuga-chan.
[19:17] Fu-girl
    Hey, Sommelier-kun, I—
[19:20] Umio
    The back of my head feels warm.
[19:25] Umio
    My head's going to explode!
[19:29] Fu-girl
    Get a grip, horsey! Damn you!
[19:31] Umio
    It's hard to keep balance piggybacking.
[19:44] Hio-tan
    Fuga-chan, Sommelier-kun.
[19:46] Umio
    A-Are you all right?
[19:49] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun.
[19:50] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun, get a grip.
[19:53] Umio
    Man, she took him out with a single blow.
[19:56] Fu-girl
    Having a hard head increases
    your chances of survival.
[19:59] Umio
    Let's help him already.
[20:01] Umio
    Let's take him to the nap room.
[20:08] Kantoku
    Keep it cold and he'll be fine, I'm sure.
[20:10] Fu-girl
    Thank you, Kantoku.
[20:12] Kantoku
    Come on, let's get back to work.
[20:16] Fu-girl
    He looks like he's having nightmares.
[20:19] Fu-girl
    Can I stay to keep an eye on him?
[20:21] Kantoku
    Sure, the shop will be fine.
[20:23] Kantoku
    Later.
[20:32] Fu-girl
    It's so swollen.
[20:34] Fu-girl
    I'm sorry, Sommelier-kun.
[20:43] Fu-girl
    Sommelier-kun's surprisingly
    cute when he's asleep.
[21:17] Umio
    Oh, Fu Girl-san.
[21:18] Umio
    How's Sommelier-san?
SIGN    Manager
[23:37] Fu-girl
    I kissed him. I kissed him. I kissed him...
SIGN    Thank you for watching.
SIGN    See you next time!
SIGN    Illustration: Kobayashi Yu
SIGN    See you again!

12 - The Hermit's Library / When the Cherry Blossoms Bloom /

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Umio
    Are you all right, Sensei-san?
SIGN    It's the last episode of Denki-gai.
[00:05] Hio
    Jeez, Umi-chan, you shouldn't
    have gotten her so drunk
SIGN    It's a little sad...
[00:08] ---
    just because Kantoku's paying.
SIGN    It was brief, but thank you, everyone!!
[00:10] Umio
    Sorry, I didn't mean to.
[00:11] Hio
    Okay. I'm heading home now.
[00:13] Hio
    Takaido is far from here. Bye.
SIGN    Please continue to support Denki-gai in the future!
[00:14] Umio
    Good work.
[00:16] Umio
    Come on, the last train's going to arrive.
SIGN    Finally, a word from our mascot, Umanami-chan:
[00:19] Umio
    Let's hurry.
[00:21] Umio
    Get up.
SIGN    Just a quick word, then...
SIGN    You can get drunk, but don't let the drunk get you
[00:30] Umio
    Are you all right?
[00:31] Umio
    Sensei-san!
[00:35] A
    The next station is Koiwa.
[00:38] Umio
    Okay, Sensei-san, I get off here.
[00:41] Sensei
    I can't...
[00:44] Umio
    Sensei-san.
[00:47] Umio
    Sensei!
[00:51] Umio
    Sensei-san!
[00:55] Umio
    Sensei-san, are you all right?
[01:02] Umio
    Are you okay?
[01:11] Sensei
    I feel terrible.
[01:12] Umio
    There are no more trains.
[01:14] Umio
    Could you walk one more station?
[01:16] Umio
    I guess not.
[01:18] Umio
    A taxi?
[01:25] Umio
    Oh, well.
[01:28] Umio
    Do you want to come rest at my place?
[01:30] Sensei
    Okay.
[01:38] Umio
    Sensei-san, be careful, you're teetering.
[01:42] Umio
    Here.
[01:44] Umio
    Take my hand.
[02:15] Umio
    What's wrong, Sensei?
SIGN    The Hermit's Library
[02:18] Umio
    We're at my apartment.
[02:21] Umio
    I brought Sensei-san here
    because of the circumstances,

[02:24] ---
    but is this all right?
[02:26] Umio
    I'll be ready in 40 seconds.
[02:28] Umio
    Wait here, please.
[02:41] Umio
    Clean-up mission, start!
[02:44] Umio
    First, all the ero-manga and ero-doujins
    go in the back of the shelf.
[02:48] Umio
    And hide them with wholesome books.
SIGN    A Pervy Book | An Unwholesome Book | Not Upright | Sleazy Hentai | Sleazy | Super Ero | Eros | Ero | Ero | Eroero
SIGN    Fairly Normal | Interesting Book | Nice | Serious | Not Ero | Normal A Proper Book | Serious Business | Really Serious The Wholesome | Insanely Wholesome
[02:52] Umio
    Next, all my body pillows!
[02:54] Umio
    Stuff them in the closet!
[02:58] Umio
    Put all the scraps and
    tissues in my garbage bag.
[03:02] Umio
    Shove it in the bath tub!
[03:04] Umio
    Hide it with the shower curtain!
[03:06] Umio
    Any wives I can't put in
    my closet go in the fridge!
[03:10] Umio
    Change my computer desktop
    to the default one!
[03:13] Umio
    Clean the flooring, clear the odors!
[03:17] Umio
    Mission accomplished!
[03:22] Umio
    Thanks for waiting.
[03:26] Umio
    Are you all right?
[03:28] Sensei
    Yeah, I think I feel a lot better.
[03:31] Sensei
    I kind of let myself come
    to Umi-kun's place,
[03:35] ---
    but come to think of it, I'm kind of nervous.
[03:38] Sensei
    On top of that,
[03:41] Sensei
    He saw me embarrass myself!
[03:45] Umio
    Sensei-san, are you all right?
[03:47] Umio
    This'll refresh you. Drink it.
[03:50] Umio
    The washroom's over there.
[03:51] Umio
    Be sure to go as soon as you need to.
[03:54] Sensei
    Thanks.
[03:56] Sensei
    What's going on?
[03:57] Sensei
    He's nicer than usual.
[03:59] Sensei
    I've never seen Umi-kun like this.
[04:02] Sensei
    Is it because I'm drunk?
SIGN    Answer: He feels guilty for making her drink so much
[04:09] Sensei
    I want water.
[04:11] Umio
    Here.
[04:12] Sensei
    I feel sick.
[04:13] Sensei
    Rub my back.
[04:14] Umio
    Okay.
[04:15] Sensei
    Massage my shoulders.
[04:17] Umio
    Okay.
[04:18] Sensei
    Clean my glasses.
[04:19] Umio
    Okay.
[04:20] Sensei
    Fair-breeze my track jacket.
[04:22] Umio
    Okay.
[04:24] Sensei
    Umi-kun does everything I ask.
[04:27] Sensei
    All right, I can pretend I'm drunk.
[04:30] Sensei
    Now...
[04:31] Umio
    Yes?
[04:32] Sensei
    Uh...
[04:37] Sensei
    P-Pat my head.
[04:41] Umio
    What?
[04:45] Sensei
    I went too far!
[04:51] Umio
    Um, like this?
[04:55] Sensei
    Yeah.
[04:56] Umio
    Sorry, I'm kind of confused.
[04:59] Sensei
    Yeah.
[05:01] Umio
    Your hair's so shiny, Sensei-san.
[05:04] Sensei
    Yeah? Thanks.
[05:07] Sensei
    I didn't think he really would.
[05:09] Sensei
    But no more.
[05:12] Sensei
    Screw it, let's go.
[05:15] Sensei
    Can I... Can I put my head on your lap?
[05:19] Umio
    Huh?
[05:23] Sensei
    I said it!
[05:24] Sensei
    Is it okay? Will he freak out?
[05:28] Sensei
    He's hesitating!
[05:31] Sensei
    Look at his face!
    He doesn't know what to do!
[05:34] Sensei
    This floor's so hard and cold and gross!
[05:37] Sensei
    Do it, or I'll puke!
[05:38] Sensei
    Now! I'll puke now!
[05:40] Umio
    Okay, I got it.
[05:41] Umio
    It can't be helped.
[05:42] Umio
    Okay.
[05:44] Umio
    Here.
[06:04] Sensei
    No creepy sounds!
[06:06] Umio
    Sorry, I respond to having
    my thighs touched,
[06:09] Umio
    even when I have a cat on my lap.
[06:15] Sensei
    I'm okay now.
[06:16] Sensei
    I'll take the first train home.
[06:18] Umio
    Take your time.
[06:20] Sensei
    Okay.
[06:21] Sensei
    Really, though,
[06:23] ---
    when I take a good look, it's nice and tidy.
[06:26] Sensei
    There's nothing otaku-ish about his room.
[06:31] Sensei
    You're reading this manga, too?
[06:34] Sensei
    Am I not allowed to read it?
[06:36] Umio
    No, I mean...
[06:37] Sensei
    Ah, I get it.
[06:39] Sensei
    Books are important.
[06:40] ---
    Uh... yeah!
[06:42] Umio
    The ero-hon behind it!
[06:44] Sensei
    Can I look something up online?
SIGN    Internet Eroxplorer
[06:47] Text
    The ero-website I was looking at earlier!
SIGN    Proper Chorome Search
[06:50] Sensei
    What's wrong, Umi-kun?
[06:53] Umio
    It's the other browser.
[06:55] Umio
    I'm saved.
[06:56] Sensei
    Can I put my bottle in the fridge?
[06:59] Sensei
    Hey, your closet looks
    like it's about to open.
[07:02] Sensei
    Where's the garbage bag?
[07:04] Sensei
    Are you all right?
[07:06] Umio
    Yes.
SIGN    Butt
[07:08] ---
    It's my butt cushion that was
    mixed with my normal ones, Shiri!
[07:13] ---
    I have to hide it before she finds out.
[07:15] ---
    Sensei-san,
[07:17] ---
    have you seen this manga?
[07:19] Sensei
    Which one?
[07:20] Umio
    This one.
[07:21] Sensei
    Why is he suddenly coming so close to me?
[07:24] Umio
    The backgrounds in this
    manga are edited photos,
[07:25] Umio
    Almost got it!
[07:27] ---
    but it's seriously good. See?
[07:30] Sensei
    Umi-kun put his hand on my shoulder!
[07:46] Umio
    Sensei-san's face up close.
[07:51] Umio
    Looking at her now, Sensei-san is...
[07:58] Sensei
    U-Umi—
[08:03] Umio
    Huh?
[08:05] Sensei
    Huh?
[08:22] Umio
    Garbage.
[08:23] Umio
    She's looking at me like
    she's looking at garbage!
[08:27] Umio
    After all that, she found out.
[08:29] Sensei
    Confiscated!
[08:30] Umio
    Okay.
SIGN    Park Map
[08:42] Kantoku
    Thank you, everyone, for gathering
    here on this busy day.
[08:49] Kantoku
    We will now begin the Umanohone Kantoku team
[08:51] ---
    cosplay cherry blossom picnic.
[08:54] Kantoku
    Cheers!
[08:56] All
    Cheers!
[09:03] Hio
    Let's dig in.
[09:04] All
    Let's eat.
[09:07] Hio
    I never knew there was a
    place like this so close to Uma.
[09:10] Kantoku
    Yeah, it's not crowded
    either. It's nice, right?
[09:14] Umio
    Kantoku, what exactly is this about?
[09:17] Kantoku
    What?
[09:17] Umio
    What about Tsumorin?
[09:19] Tsumorin
    I love cosplay!
[09:20] Umio
    What about Tsumorin?!
[09:21] Tsumorin
    I love drinking!
[09:23] Umio
    Why haven't you called Tsumorin?!
[09:25] Kantoku
    She's at a signing overseas.
[09:28] Umio
    Such a popular author.
[09:30] Kantoku
    Besides, she's an outsider.
[09:33] Umio
    Don't call her an outsider.
[09:35] Umio
    Why is G-men-san here?
[09:37] Umio
    She's totally cosplaying, too.
[09:39] Kantoku
    That's true.
[09:41] Kantoku
    Don't drink.
[09:44] Kantoku
    Say something.
[09:46] Kantoku
    You're pretty wasted!
[09:48] Hio
    Sommelier-kun invited her.
[09:53] Hio
    Come on, the more the merrier.
[09:58] Kantoku
    Fine, I guess.
[10:03] Umio
    Help me!
[10:04] Umio
    My manuscript won't go through!
[10:07] Sensei
    There, there, let's drink
    up and forget about it.
[10:13] Sensei
    Damn, you're strong.
[10:16] Sensei
    Now, one more.
[10:18] Sensei
    Here, Hiotan-senpai, G-men-san, drink up.
[10:22] Hio
    Thanks, just a little bit.
[10:24] ---
    Sure thing.
[10:24] G-men
    Thank you.
[10:25] ---
    Whoa, there.
[10:28] Umio
    How about you, Kameko-san?
[10:29] Kameko
    I can't take a drop of alcohol.
[10:32] Umio
    Oh, dear. Have some oolong tea, then.
[10:34] Kameko
    Thanks.
[10:36] Umio
    Fu-girl-san, chug that coffee milk!
[10:39] Fu-girl
    Yeah, thanks.
[10:41] Umio
    I'll gather the trash.
[10:43] Kantoku
    Umio's helper skills are activated.
[10:46] Umio
    Let's raise the roof!
SIGN    Bishoujo
SIGN    Coshee
[11:19] Kantoku
    What's up, Sommelier?
[11:21] Kantoku
    Are you smashed already?
[11:22] Hio
    Look who's talking, Kantoku.
    You're drinking oolong tea!
[11:26] Kantoku
    Huh?
[11:27] Hio
    Don't be a wimp!
[11:29] Kantoku
    Are you drunk?
[11:30] Hio
    Come on, drink up!
[11:33] Hio
    Are you telling me you
    can't handle my drinks?
[11:37] Kantoku
    Dude, you're annoying.
    Someone help me.
[11:41] Tsumorin
    Want me to help you?
[11:43] Kantoku
    Tsumorin.
[11:46] Umio
    Tsumorin in the flesh!
[11:48] Umio
    Tsumorin!
[11:51] Kantoku
    Why're you here?
[11:52] Kantoku
    Didn't you go overseas yesterday?
[11:53] Tsumorin
    It was a day trip!
SIGN    Earth's pretty small...
SIGN    Taiwan Gifts
[11:56] Tsumorin
    I left yesterday morning
    and came home at night.
[11:59] Umio
    That's a tight schedule. Good work.
[12:02] Tsumorin
    Never mind that.
[12:03] ---
    Kan-chan,
[12:04] Kantoku
    Yes?
[12:05] Tsumorin
    Why didn't you invite me to come
    to the cherry blossom picnic?
[12:08] Kantoku
    I knew you were at a signing overseas.
[12:10] Tsumorin
    Nope!
[12:12] Tsumorin
    You deliberately set up the picnic
    on the same day as my signing.
[12:14] Tsumorin
    You would have moved it if you knew.
[12:16] Tsumorin
    Or you'd at least have let me know.
[12:23] Kantoku
    I, um, Tsumorin?
[12:26] Tsumorin
    Just because I was a bit
    wild at a picnic one time.
SIGN    First year
SIGN    Beautiful Memories of Tsumorin the Drunk
SIGN    Second year
SIGN    Third year
[12:30] Kantoku
    Every year!
[12:31] Kantoku
    And not just a bit!
[12:32] Kantoku
    You knew it?
[12:34] Hio
    You're an awful man, Kantoku.
[12:35] Kameko
    The worst.
[12:36] Kameko
    Enemy of womankind!
[12:37] Umio
    My enemy!
[12:38] Kantoku
    Stop it, you're being deceived.
[12:41] Hio
    Kantoku, you cakeface!
[12:43] Kantoku
    Why you little!
[12:47] Tsumorin
    It's okay.
[12:51] Tsumorin
    I made it.
[12:52] Tsumorin
    Let's all have fun and drink up.
[12:56] Tsumorin
    However, Kantoku, you're no good.
[12:59] Kameko
    Kantoku's down.
[13:01] Hio
    Tsumorin wins!
[13:03] Tsumorin
    Yes!
[13:05] Tsumorin
    Let's drink. Here you are, Umio-kun.
[13:08] Umio
    Thank you.
[13:12] Tsumorin
    My, you're strong.
[13:16] Umio
    As many liters as you can give me, Tsumorin.
[13:18] Tsumorin
    Oh, I'm so happy.
[13:20] Tsumorin
    You're so awesome.
[13:24] Kameko
    Umio's down.
[13:26] Sensei
    Umi-kun.
[13:27] Tsumorin
    Oh, too bad.
[13:28] Tsumorin
    Sommelier-kun's next.
[13:30] Tsumorin
    Where's Sommelier-kun?
[13:32] Tsumorin
    Oh my, he's already down.
[13:36] Tsumorin
    Good night, sleep tight!
[13:39] Hio
    No more!
[13:41] Tsumorin
    Let's drink!
SIGN    Umio Kantoku Sommelier
[13:46] Hio
    It makes sense why Kantoku
    didn't call Tsumorin.
[13:49] Sensei
    I get it now.
[13:50] Tsumorin
    Hey, Sensei-chan.
[13:51] Tsumorin
    You haven't had enough sake, have you?
[13:53] Tsumorin
    And you don't not have inadequate
    girl power, don't you?
[13:55] Sensei
    What does my girl power
    have to do with anything?
[13:59] Tsumorin
    Come on, it's warm outside.
[14:01] Tsumorin
    You have to wear something more revealing.
[14:03] Tsumorin
    No! S-Stop it!
[14:04] Tsumorin
    Come on! Take it off!
[14:06] Tsumorin
    No!
[14:08] Tsumorin
    A beat-up neckline, two tee-shirts,
[14:11] ---
    frayed ends, moth holes, the print
    is so faded it's almost white.
[14:17] Sensei
    Say something!
[14:20] Sensei
    FML!
[14:21] Tsumorin
    Oh, Hio-tan.
[14:23] Tsumorin
    My, what nice boobs you have.
[14:25] Tsumorin
    Let's do naughty things together.
[14:26] ---
    Stop!
[14:27] Tsumorin
    No one's watching.
[14:27] Hio
    They are, they're taking pictures!
[14:29] Tsumorin
    See, no one's watching!
[14:45] Kameko
    Tsumorin's finally quiet.
[14:48] Kameko
    Oy vey.
[14:50] Umio
    Is Tsumorin asleep?
[14:52] Kameko
    Umio-kun.
[14:53] Umio
    I recover quickly.
[14:56] Umio
    Everyone's smashed, huh?
[14:59] Umio
    Let's drink a little more.
[15:04] Kameko
    I'm in.
[15:17] Umio
    Maybe we should wake everyone up now.
[15:19] Kameko
    Let's let them sleep a little more.
[15:22] Kameko
    No, Tsumorin and Sensei-chan
    seem sleep-deprived.
[15:27] Umio
    You're amazing, Kameko-san.
[15:30] Kameko
    What brings that up?
[15:32] Umio
    You're paying attention to everyone.
[15:34] Umio
    I guess I'm not surprised.
[15:39] Kameko
    Do you have anyone you like?
[15:44] Umio
    What brings that up?
[15:45] Kameko
    No, you're so kind and perceptive.
[15:49] Kameko
    It seems like you always take a
    step back to see the whole picture.
[15:54] Kameko
    You'll end up part of the
    audience if you keep it up.
[16:02] Kameko
    Oh, taking photos is about
    taking slices of life.
[16:05] Kameko
    So a good photographer has to be invisible.
[16:08] Kameko
    I mean, well,
[16:12] ---
    I don't know what I'm talking about.
[16:14] Kameko
    Never mind. Forget I said that.
[16:15] ---
    Juice, juice...
[16:16] Umio
    Kameko-san.
[16:19] Umio
    I'm watching over you well.
[16:25] Kameko
    You don't have to watch over me.
[16:29] Kameko
    Let's take pictures.
[16:31] Kameko
    Say cheese, Umio-kun.
[16:35] Kameko
    The cherry blossoms are pretty.
[16:42] Umio
    Sensei-san.
[16:43] Sensei
    Let me put my head on your lap, you bastard.
[16:46] Sensei
    Pat my head, you bastard.
[16:50] Sensei
    Don't be so cheap!
SIGN    When the Cherry Blossoms Bloom
SIGN    Manager
[21:16] Manager
    We'll begin our morning assembly.
SIGN    Every Staff Member at Umanohone
[21:19] All
    Yes.
[21:20] Manager
    Welcome.
SIGN    Who knew there were so many?
[21:21] All
    Welcome.
[21:23] Manager
    Thank you.
[21:24] All
    Thank you.
[21:25] Manager
    My apologies.
[21:27] All
    My apologies.
[21:29] Manager
    Please wait.
[21:31] All
    Please wait.
[21:33] Manager
    The boobs are this way.
[21:35] All
    The boobs are this way.
[21:37] Manager
    Wnerland opens today!
[21:40] All**
    Wnerland opens today!
[21:42] Manager**
    Yes, lolita! No touch!
[21:45] All
    Yes, lolita! No touch!
[21:48] Manager
    But I'm a boy. Are you sure?
[21:51] All
    But I'm a boy. Are you sure?
[21:54] Manager
    Umanohone workout!
[21:57] Manager
    Grovel on all fours!
[21:59] Manager
    Raise your ass high and take
    the female leopard pose!
[22:02] Manager
    And now spread your legs wide!
    The M-leg pose!
[22:07] Manager
    Stay in position, and
    "I couldn't resist the d*ng!"
[22:13] Manager
    And back.
[22:14] Manager
    Stand for the company theme song.
[22:19] Manager
    I'm the manager, you're working overtime
[22:21] Manager
    Forget your weekend plans,
    our hours are a crime
[22:25] Manager
    To hell with labor laws,
[22:29] Manager
    all your friends are gone
[22:31] Manager
    Yamada's quitting Uma
[22:33] Manager
    What? He never said he would've!
[22:36] Manager
    Missed the final train?
    Hit up the net cafe!
[22:38] Manager
    We're here in Denki-gai,
    but you look down tonight
[22:41] Manager
    Missed out on Comikat,
    is that the reason why?
[22:43] Manager
    Well time to hit the sack,
    play with yourself and cry
[22:48] A
    Manager, LLO's on hold, right?
[22:50] ---
    Get me Superfap-sensei's new title, too.
[22:53] Manager
    Report!
[22:55] Manager
    Commercial 18+ floor!
[22:56] A
    Sir!
[22:57] A
    We're expecting a large crowd today
    due to Happy Milk-sensei's new title.
[23:01] Manager
    Good, next!
[23:03] Manager
    Games and video!
[23:04] B
    Sir!
[23:05] B
    Today's the end-of-the-month ero-game day.
[23:07] B
    The staff pick is "Super-scant
    Perviest Person in the Universe!"
[23:09] Manager
    Good, have one on hold, please.
[23:11] B
    Yes.
[23:12] Manager
    Next, commercial light novels floor.
[23:14] Manager
    "Everyone On Earth Except Me Has Become
    My Younger Sister" goes on sale today.
[23:19] Manager
    I'm recommending Asumi.
[23:20] Manager
    I'm a Mayumi man.
[23:22] Manager
    I'm looking forward to
    working with you today.
[23:26] All
    Looking forward to it.
[23:31] Kantoku
    Okay, let's get to work.
[23:33] All
    Okay.
[23:41] ---
    Denki-gai no
    Honya-san
SIGN    The End
SIGN    Thank You!!!
SIGN    Illustration: Mizu Asato