4 - Kicking Turbo Granny's Ass

Source: Crunchyroll
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SIGN    KEEP OUT
SIGN    EPISODE 4
    KICKING TURBO GRANNY'S ASS
[00:10] ---
    Okarun, you first.
[00:12] ---
    I believe it's ladies first, actually.
[00:14] ---
    But see, I'm so teary-eyed.
[00:15] ---
    They're bone dry.
[00:17] ---
    It's only fair to go side-by-side!
[00:22] ---
    Hey! Okarun, you're behind me!
[00:25] ---
    Argh, that's not fair, Miss Ayase!
    Now you're behind me!
[00:28] ---
    - Damn you!
    - Wait! Hold on, stop it!
[00:33] ---
    - Let's go.
    - Okay.
[00:34] ---
    So what were we going to do again
    when Turbo Granny shows up? Punch her?
[00:38] ---
    No! We're luring her outside of Shono City
    to separate her from the location-bound spirit!
[00:42] ---
    That way, she'll weaken,
    and even we can defeat her.
[00:46] ---
    That's right, that's right.
[00:48] ---
    But we defeated that giant alien already,
    so maybe we can defeat her, too?
[00:53] ---
    You were scared just now.
[00:56] ---
    I mean, she's a granny!
[00:57] ---
    After experiencing something
    that huge, a granny...
[01:01] ---
    So huge!
[01:03] ---
    Wh-What should we do, Miss Ayase!?
[01:05] ---
    Calm down!
    You just mentioned it just now!
[01:07] ---
    We're leaving Shono City, right?
[01:08] ---
    Let's go!
[01:10] ---
    What!?
[01:14] ---
    No way! Is this legit?
[01:15] ---
    She's coming this way!
[01:17] ---
    I'm borrowing this!
[01:19] ---
    I should be able to do it. Go!
[01:25] ---
    Her eyes are mouth! So gross!
[01:28] ---
    Miss Ayase, please unleash the curse!
[01:30] ---
    I'll make something out of this!
[01:31] ---
    - Got it! Counting on you!
    - Okay! I'll do my best!
[01:37] ---
    Man, no good. I don't think I can do it.
[01:40] ---
    I am utterly useless...
[01:42] ---
    Oh, that's right,
    you become a total downer.
[01:45] ---
    I'll cheer for you, so go do your best!
    Fight on!
[01:48] ---
    I'll be crushed to death
    from that pressure...
[01:53] ---
    No way!
[01:54] ---
    Miss Ayase? What's going on?
[01:56] ---
    Why? I can't see it!
[01:58] ---
    The power of the curse is gone?
[02:00] ---
    I returned his weenie to him.
[02:02] ---
    The curse is no longer.
[02:04] ---
    What a surprise!
[02:05] ---
    I didn't expect you to use
    the power of the curse to transform!
[02:10] ---
    But I won't let you do it.
[02:12] ---
    You thieving pig!
    I won't let you use my power!
[02:17] ---
    I'm going to thoroughly chew
    and eat you up!
[02:22] ---
    Taunt her.
[02:23] ---
    That thing has absolute confidence
    in its running.
[02:26] ---
    A few random taunts
    and it's sure to take the challenge.
[02:29] ---
    Are you that scared of losing
    in a race?
[02:32] ---
    Such brute force is so unfashionable.
[02:35] ---
    I mean, your name is Turbo Granny, right?
[02:37] ---
    There's no way you'd pass a race
    to show off how fast you can run.
[02:40] ---
    If you're really Turbo...
[02:42] ---
    then challenge us with how fast you can run!
[02:52] ---
    You...
[02:54] ---
    Who do you think
    you're mouthing off to, huh?
[02:57] ---
    There's no way I'd lose in a running match.
[03:00] ---
    Fine. I'll accept your challenge.
[03:03] ---
    Besides, I can eat you two at any point.
[03:06] ---
    What are the rules?
    Where's the finish line?
[03:09] ---
    No finish line. We're playing tag.
[03:12] ---
    If you catch us, you win.
    Simple, yeah?
[03:15] ---
    Count for ten minutes when you begin.
[03:17] ---
    We'll make a run for it
    in the meantime.
[03:19] ---
    Those are the rules, so you absolutely
    have to adhere to them.
[03:22] ---
    If you don't, the legend of Turbo Granny
    will just be a piece of crap.
[03:28] ---
    Very well.
[03:29] ---
    I hate people who break the rules.
[03:31] ---
    Then, let's begin! Run, Okarun!
[03:35] ---
    One, two, three, four...
[03:37] ---
    Amazing! I totally thought
    we were goners!
[03:40] ---
    Miss Ayase, are you a genius?
[03:41] ---
    I know! But I shoulda provoked a bit harder!
[03:42] ---
    One minute, three minutes,
    five minutes...
[03:44] ---
    Ten minutes might be cutting it close!
[03:49] ---
    Eight minutes, six minutes...
[03:50] ---
    Hold on! She's counting weird!
[03:53] ---
    Ten minutes.
[03:59] ---
    Okaru...
[03:59] ---
    Miss Ayase!
[04:03] ---
    Miss Ayase!
[04:05] ---
    Her ten minutes have passed.
[04:08] ---
    Now I have to count your ten minutes.
[04:12] ---
    Forty...
[04:14] ---
    One minute... Two minutes...
[04:15] ---
    That's cheating!
    Release Miss Ayase at once!
[04:18] ---
    Fifty-six... Fifty-seven...
[04:19] ---
    Stop! That way of counting is absurd!
[04:21] ---
    You said you were going
    to adhere to the rules!
[04:23] ---
    She didn't specify how to count.
[04:25] ---
    Four minutes... Five minutes...
[04:28] ---
    Gimme a break! Stop counting!
[04:30] ---
    Ten minutes.
[04:32] ---
    There.
[04:34] ---
    Caught you.
[04:36] ---
    But you're kinda dense, Okarun.
    I'll probably be helping you next time, too!
[04:41] ---
    Let me suckle that teat!
[04:47] ---
    Ouch!
[04:49] ---
    How dare you suckle my teat
    without permission!?
[04:51] ---
    Let go, you bastard! Brat!
[04:54] ---
    You're the one who said it!
[04:56] ---
    I absolutely won't let go
    until you release Miss Ayase!
[04:59] ---
    Ouch!
[05:00] ---
    What the hell's going on?
    I can't muster my strength!
[05:03] ---
    Is it because of this outfit!?
[05:06] ---
    Damn you! I have no choice!
[05:08] ---
    I'll possess you!
[05:18] ---
    What a hassle!
[05:20] ---
    Damn brat!
[05:24] ---
    You aren't connected
    to some sorcerer, are you?
[05:29] ---
    Oh well. I'll eat the girl and end it all.
[05:36] ---
    What is this feeling
    of being crushed inside a hand?
[05:39] ---
    I can tell. Even if I can't see,
    I can tell really well.
[05:43] ---
    Granny's main form slipped in,
    so it's crystal clear...
[05:47] ---
    by sense of touch!
[05:52] ---
    Blast you!
[05:56] ---
    Let go!
[06:07] ---
    You saved me, Miss Ayase!
[06:08] ---
    That's my line.
    That was awesome, Okarun!
[06:10] ---
    Damn it! Let me outta this brat!
[06:14] ---
    I caught you, you scummy hag!
    How should we torture you now...
[06:19] ---
    Give her back.
[06:21] ---
    Give Granny back!
[06:25] ---
    Location-bound spirit, kill them!
[08:09] ---
    Crab!
[08:12] ---
    Why is the location-bound spirit a crab!?
[08:14] ---
    Grandma said the dead turn themselves
    into freshwater crabs to cross the River Styx!
SIGN    BEWARE OF BEARS
[08:24] ---
    This way! Over here!
    Where are you looking, you fool?
[08:27] ---
    Okarun, time to transform!
[08:28] ---
    Damn granny! You stay still, you punk!
[08:31] ---
    - How dare you address me as such?
    - Miss Ayase, hurry!
[08:33] ---
    It's really hard! Unlike before,
    you have the real thing in there!
[08:39] ---
    Here it comes!
[08:44] ---
    That was close! This is super serious!
[08:46] ---
    Curse you! Don't use my power
    without permission!
[08:50] ---
    Let go, you punks!
[08:51] ---
    This is great!
    It's easier to squish you directly!
[08:54] ---
    Momo-chan, it's lookin' bad.
[08:56] ---
    Hey! Don't get chummy
    and call me by my first name!
[08:58] ---
    You're too heavy
    so I can't make this curve.
[09:01] ---
    For real!?
[09:05] ---
    Damn it!
[09:09] ---
    Time to go full throttle now!
[09:13] ---
    Wicked! It's like a helicopter!
[09:15] ---
    I can't do it anymore.
[09:22] ---
    Ouch!
[09:25] ---
    Okarun, are you okay?
[09:26] ---
    I'm all droopy...
[09:28] ---
    Sorry. Seriously, you're a lifesaver!
[09:29] ---
    But I already used one full throttle.
[09:31] ---
    That's right, you can only go
    full throttle twice, right?
[09:34] ---
    But I think we gained some distance, didn't we?
[09:36] ---
    It's here!
[09:42] ---
    There's a ton of faces on its back!
[09:45] ---
    Crap! There's a lot of people here, too!
[09:46] ---
    What's that?
    He's totally giving a piggyback ride.
[09:48] ---
    What dedication. So hilarious!
[09:51] ---
    This is totally embarrassing!
[09:53] ---
    No way! Nobody else can see the crab!?
[09:55] ---
    Hold on a second!
[09:56] ---
    That means we just look like
    we're all in on a chicken fight!
[10:00] ---
    I hope I don't bump into any friends!
[10:02] ---
    Momo-chan, my stamina
    is getting seriously low.
[10:04] ---
    Come on, try harder!
    What about your other full throttle?
[10:06] ---
    No good even if I go full throttle.
    I can't leave Shono City distance-wise!
[10:09] ---
    At this rate, that thing
    will catch up and eat us!
[10:11] ---
    Seriously, anything but that!
[10:12] ---
    I ain't letting no crab eat me!
    I would rather eat a crab instead!
[10:18] ---
    Let's try something. Hang a right, Okarun!
SIGN    HEALTH LAND
[10:23] ---
    Welcome. How many will it be?
[10:25] ---
    Two!
SIGN    MANGA CAFE A TIME TO RELAX
[10:28] ---
    Head upstairs!
[10:29] ---
    It should be harder for it
    to chase us in a narrow place!
[10:33] ---
    It doesn't matter at all!?
[10:38] ---
    An explosion!
[10:39] ---
    Run away!
[10:42] ---
    Hot! What is this place?
[10:45] ---
    This is not good, Miss Ayase!
[10:46] ---
    Crabs thrive in waterfronts!
[10:49] ---
    Water is water, but...
[10:52] ---
    this is a hot spring!
[11:01] ---
    When you boil crabs, the meat
    tightens up and gets plump, right?
[11:04] ---
    Tightening up means that
    the muscle fibers stiffen up,
[11:07] ---
    so maybe its movements will slow down.
[11:18] ---
    It stopped. It stopped!
[11:20] ---
    Boiled!
[11:21] ---
    Now that it's all red,
    it totally looks yummy!
[11:24] ---
    Freaky! You were looking at it like that?
[11:26] ---
    Stop eyeing it,
    and let's just get out of here!
[11:30] ---
    Straight down this road
    and we'll escape Shono City.
[11:33] ---
    Wait, aren't there fewer people than before?
[11:35] ---
    Indeed.
[11:41] ---
    What's that?
[11:47] ---
    Crap, crap, crap, crap!
[11:50] ---
    What are those guys!?
[11:52] ---
    Idiots! You won't get away that easily!
[11:55] ---
    There's a giant cemetery
    at the edge of Shono City!
[11:59] ---
    I just borrowed some help
    from the spirits already resting there.
[12:02] ---
    After all, Shono City is our territory!
[12:13] ---
    Miss Ayase!
[12:16] ---
    We're not letting you leave Shono City!
[12:28] ---
    Okarun, go full throttle.
[12:30] ---
    Huh? Is it all right?
[12:32] ---
    Even if I use it here,
    we won't make it to the next city!
[12:37] ---
    If you don't use it, we'll die right here!
[12:39] ---
    Trust me!
[12:45] ---
    Man, I'm so depressed.
[12:47] ---
    You're done for.
[12:49] ---
    One more full throttle from this kid
    and he'll be immobile!
[12:56] ---
    Do it!
[13:25] ---
    Momo-chan, I can't make this turn!
[13:44] ---
    Don't stop!
[13:58] ---
    Momo-chan! We gotta get back
    to the original route!
[14:21] ---
    You untransformed!
[14:23] ---
    Huh?
[14:26] ---
    Don't suddenly let go of me!
[14:40] ---
    Okarun, land!
[14:58] ---
    I'm done for. I'm at my limit!
[15:00] ---
    My body is going to rip apart!
[15:02] ---
    Too wicked! I thought
    I was gonna puke out my organs!
[15:06] ---
    Okarun, stand up!
[15:08] ---
    It's only a little further!
[15:12] ---
    Turbo Granny.
[15:14] ---
    Crap, I let go of her!
[15:22] ---
    I can't forgive you for this.
    You keep cheating.
[15:25] ---
    What I detest the most...
[15:28] ---
    is your lack of respect for elders.
[15:31] ---
    You really are an amazing senior.
[15:34] ---
    I've never seen an old person
    who can bully young folks this much.
[15:37] ---
    Mad respect for that.
[15:39] ---
    Speak properly, you punk.
[15:41] ---
    I can see through your ploys
    to use modern words to fool the elderly.
[15:46] ---
    I really hate those words. I hate it.
[15:49] ---
    I hate shady brats like that.
[15:52] ---
    What a...
[15:59] ---
    son of a bitch.
[16:01] ---
    All right, I'll eat ya, so run away.
[16:04] ---
    You can leave Shono City real soon now.
[16:08] ---
    I'll wait for you to finish running.
    Ten minutes? Or 20 minutes?
[16:15] ---
    Then I'll take one second.
[16:19] ---
    My ability is to take anything...
[16:24] ---
    and grab it.
[16:32] ---
    Get back here!
[16:35] ---
    Turbo Granny used to be called
    Hundred Kilo Granny!
[16:38] ---
    The Takasaki Line's maximum speed
    is 120 kmph!
[16:42] ---
    She can't catch up to us!
[16:44] ---
    You're so slow! What a slowpoke!
[16:46] ---
    You're nothing compared to us!
[16:48] ---
    You're dead meat!
[16:55] ---
    You fool!
[16:57] ---
    Trains aren't always going at full speed!
[17:01] ---
    They slow down at curves!
[17:03] ---
    But I can always run at 100 kmph.
    I'm not letting you get away!
[17:08] ---
    "I'm not letting you get away,"
    is my line, moron.
[17:11] ---
    Just like Grandma said,
    you always take the bait if I taunt ya.
[17:15] ---
    You're already on board...
[17:18] ---
    the rails of your defeat.
[17:23] ---
    Yeah. Welcome to Kamigoe City.
[17:27] ---
    You rotten bastard pigs!
[17:30] ---
    Let go of me!
[17:31] ---
    You were really fast, senior.
[17:34] ---
    It's like you haven't lived
    a long time for nothing.
[17:36] ---
    Nobody can win against you.
[17:39] ---
    But in this race...
[17:42] ---
    I win.
[18:11] ---
    Ow.
[18:24] ---
    Miss Ayase, where are we!?
[18:26] ---
    Where's the crab? And Turbo Granny?
[18:29] ---
    Looks like we defeated them.
[18:35] ---
    I really didn't want to be rough like this.
[18:40] ---
    This is where girls around your age were violated,
    cut to pieces, and tossed away.
[18:46] ---
    They didn't become evil spirits
    because they wanted to.
[18:54] ---
    We spirit mediums
    have long hunted Turbo Granny.
[19:00] ---
    Granny always showed up in places
    where spirits of girls met irrational deaths.
[19:06] ---
    Perhaps she went around consoling the spirits
    of the girls who couldn't rest in peace.
[19:12] ---
    But the dead shouldn't assault the living.
    That's no good.
[19:16] ---
    We have to use force
    to send them to the other side.
[19:20] ---
    The same goes for the living.
    They should never do anything to mock the dead.
[19:25] ---
    Trample into their territory disrespectfully,
    and you can only blame yourself for your death.
[19:30] ---
    Those are the rules for the living
    and the dead to coexist.
[19:41] ---
    I'm glad you were okay.
[19:46] ---
    Damn it, old hag!
    Don't take all the big ones!
[19:50] ---
    If you don't give me this piece of crab,
    I'll break your Bakatono DVDs!
[19:53] ---
    Try me! You do that and I'll burn
    all your Ken Takakura merch!
[19:57] ---
    You're taking Mr. Ken as hostage!?
    You really aren't human!
[19:59] ---
    You're the one
    who took Bakatono hostage first!
[20:02] ---
    - What'd you say, hag!?
    - Huh?
[20:02] ---
    Um, I don't have an appetite,
    so if you'd like...
[20:06] ---
    You have crab right in front of you
    but no appetite? What a loser.
[20:09] ---
    Monster.
[20:10] ---
    I'd totally be eating
    under normal circumstances!
[20:12] ---
    How can you eat crab right after
    experiencing what happened?
[20:14] ---
    Then what do you want to eat
    at what kind of time, you entitled brat?
[20:19] ---
    I don't want to talk anymore!
[20:21] ---
    You're so whiny for a guy.
    Are you sure you have something down there?
[20:25] ---
    I do! Thank you for retrieving it for me!
[20:28] ---
    Show me.
[20:29] ---
    Huh?
[20:30] ---
    I'm telling you to show me
    that it's actually there.
[20:32] ---
    Um...
[20:34] ---
    Are you stupid?
[20:41] ---
    Are you insane!?
[20:43] ---
    Miss Ayase, do something about this!
[20:47] ---
    This family is insane!
[20:50] ---
    Hold up, you!
[20:55] ---
    Thank you for everything.
[20:57] ---
    It's late so be careful.
[20:59] ---
    I think it'll be safer than this house.
[21:02] ---
    You're not getting away next time.
[21:04] ---
    I'm never showing you.
[21:06] ---
    So chilly.
[21:10] ---
    Leave her be. She's not serious about it.
[21:14] ---
    You weren't eating crab and were pretty depressed,
    so I think she tried to cheer you up?
[21:19] ---
    So that's it. I'm sorry I made her
    be so considerate...
[21:23] ---
    Not!
[21:25] ---
    Well then, goodbye.
[21:27] ---
    Yeah. Bye-bye.
[21:32] ---
    Goodbye?
[21:34] ---
    Goodbye...
[21:36] ---
    Goodbye?
[21:38] ---
    Goodbye...
[21:40] ---
    Goodbye?
[21:42] ---
    Goodbye...
[21:45] ---
    Goodbye?
[21:47] ---
    Goodbye...
[21:49] ---
    Goodbye?
[21:55] ---
    Okarun!
[22:01] ---
    See you tomorrow!
[22:09] ---
    Okay!
[23:42] ---
    Grandma, why was it a crab?
[23:44] ---
    They say spirits of the dead turn themselves
    into freshwater crabs to cross the River Styx!
[23:48] ---
    That's why they turned into location-bound
    spirits inside that tunnel.
[23:50] ---
    But yeah, I'm surprised
    you really ate all that crab!
SIGN    EPISODE 5 LIKE, WHERE ARE YOU BALLS?
[23:52] ---
    Next episode,
    "Like, Where Are Your Balls!?"
[23:54] ---
    That's why I told you to show me.