# Season 1
# 1 - That's How Love Starts, Ya Know!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[01:30] ---**
Huh?
**[01:31] ---**
I said, if you ain't lendin' me money,
then no date today.
**[01:37] ---**
Oh, but I'd be okay
if you finally put out instead.
**[01:41] ---**
You'll pay for the love hotel, though.
**[01:50] ---**
You need to be punched!
**[01:51] ---**
Why you little...
**[01:56] ---**
You're full of it!
**[01:58] ---**
I've had enough of you!
**[02:01] ---**
Yer broke and ya ain't puttin' out!
Get lost!
**[02:04] ---**
Gimme a break, moron!
**[02:06] ---**
Octopus! Squid! Tuna!
**[02:10] ---**
Totes funny!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 1
THAT'S HOW LOVE STARTS, YA KNOW!
**[02:12] ---**
Seafood names aren't insults.
**[02:14] ---**
Come on, comfort me!
He was my first boyfriend.
**[02:19] ---**
That's why I told you to not go for him.
**[02:21] ---**
What was so good about him, anyway?
**[02:23] ---**
He looked like Ken Takakura.
**[02:25] ---**
- Oh, there you go.
- You're so annoying.
**[02:28] ---**
Nothing wrong with that!
I like masculine guys like Ken Takakura!
**[02:32] ---**
"I am an awkward fellow, after all."
**[02:34] ---**
Dudes like that are extinct.
**[02:40] ---**
*What the heck.*
**[02:42] ---**
*Will I not be able to meet
another Mr. Ken in my lifetime?*
**[02:46] ---**
Come on, someone comfort me!
**[02:50] ---**
Such a cruel world.
**[02:55] ---**
- Damn it!
- You missed?
**[02:56] ---**
- I did miss.
- Don't look over here. Gross.
**[03:00] ---**
- We have this, too.
- Nice.
**[03:03] ---**
Put a magnet inside.
**[03:05] ---**
This'll hurt, won't it?
**[03:12] ---**
What are you reading there?
**[03:15] ---**
Oh? Uh, um...
***SIGN*** BIRTH OF THE AEROSPACE SELF-DEFENSE FORCE GUARDING OUTER SPACE!!
**[03:20] ---**
How lame.
**[03:26] ---**
Do only scum live in this world?
**[03:32] ---**
Man, I've had enough.
**[03:35] ---**
Where can I relieve all this stress?
**[03:38] ---**
Miss Momo Ayase!
**[03:40] ---**
I know you're in love!
**[03:42] ---**
Huh?
**[03:43] ---**
I know you're in love!
**[03:45] ---**
How many times you gonna say that?
**[03:47] ---**
Someone like Miss Ayase talking to me?
That's gotta be the only reason!
**[03:52] ---**
Maybe you got the wrong idea?
**[03:54] ---**
It's not like I wanna get
chummy with you or anything.
**[03:57] ---**
Forget all that earlier.
**[03:58] ---**
This is what I'm talking about!
**[04:00] ---**
The President has already gone to Mars!
What is the entirety of Project Pegasus!?
**[04:04] ---**
Huh? What?
**[04:05] ---**
You're a fan of the occult!
**[04:07] ---**
Oh, I don't believe in UFOs or aliens
or stuff like that.
**[04:11] ---**
I'm not talking about a UFO, but a UAP!
***SIGN*** PO
**[04:13] ---**
Unidentified Aerial Phenomena!
**[04:16] ---**
Hey, you're being a pest.
**[04:18] ---**
The U.S. military has officially acknowledged
the existence of UAPs and reformed the Space Force!
**[04:23] ---**
Japan has also newly created
an Aerospace Defense Force!
**[04:25] ---**
Any way you look at it,
they're getting ready for Space Wars!
**[04:28] ---**
Can I go now?
**[04:29] ---**
What?
**[04:30] ---**
No, wait! This has the newest image
of Nessie, too. Here!
**[04:34] ---**
It also talks about Lieutenant Colonel
Jim Channon and Skinwalker Ranch!
**[04:39] ---**
Shut up!
**[04:41] ---**
I just got dumped
so I don't want any of this.
**[04:45] ---**
How you push stuff at me is so typical
of otaku and really annoying!
**[04:48] ---**
That's why you have no friends!
**[04:53] ---**
Don't talk to me like you know me.
**[05:05] ---**
Sorry, that was a bit much.
***SIGN*** YOUR TRUE POWERS AND POTENTIAL HAVE YET TO AWAKEN...
**[05:26] ---**
Here.
**[05:30] ---**
I don't believe in aliens.
**[05:32] ---**
But I do believe in ghosts.
**[05:34] ---**
Oh no, there's no such thing as ghosts.
**[05:37] ---**
I matched the conversation topic to yours,
but you outright deny that!?
**[05:41] ---**
Don't you mock the occult!
**[05:47] ---**
Just so you know,
my grandma is a spirit medium.
**[05:50] ---**
What?
**[05:51] ---**
Have you ever seen exorcism?
It's really wicked!
**[05:55] ---**
The possessed person goes into convulsions!
**[05:58] ---**
You can go into convulsions from illness, too.
**[06:00] ---**
It's not proof that ghosts are out there.
**[06:03] ---**
Then have you ever had
an alien let you ride a UFO!?
**[06:06] ---**
Your logic is jumping too far!
Are you an idiot!?
**[06:12] ---**
Huh?
**[06:14] ---**
She gave up on Ken Takakura
and went after an otaku?
**[06:17] ---**
Look. It's like she doesn't care
what other people would think.
**[06:20] ---**
Can't say I hate it.
**[06:22] ---**
Then let's have a contest, dammit!
**[06:25] ---**
If there really are ghosts,
you'll be serving me as a gofer!
**[06:28] ---**
I'll show you UFOs, I mean, UAPs!
**[06:31] ---**
If you're able to see one, M-Miss Ayase,
you'll be my gofer instead!
***SIGN*** NAGI GENERAL HOSPITAL
***SIGN*** OCCULT-KUN
**[06:42] ---**
What is this place?
It's way too scary!
**[06:45] ---**
What part of this is a UFO hotspot?
**[06:48] ---**
*Nagi Hospital there is called
the sanctuary for UFOs!*
**[06:52] ---**
*If you call for a UFO on the roof,
you will experience Abduction!*
**[06:55] ---**
What's Abduction?
**[06:59] ---**
*That's when an alien kidnaps you
and experiments with your body.*
**[07:03] ---**
Wait, hold on! Have you been
experimented on before!?
**[07:06] ---**
*There is a chance that I have!*
**[07:08] ---**
Huh?
**[07:09] ---**
*Many people who experience Abduction
have their memories erased.*
**[07:12] ---**
Hey, you. You've never seen
a UFO before, have you?
**[07:15] ---**
*Do you know about regressive hypnosis?*
**[07:17] ---**
Don't change the subject on me.
**[07:19] ---**
*It's not an issue
of whether or not you've seen one!*
**[07:21] ---**
*The point is whether or not
there's proper proof that it exists!*
**[07:24] ---**
Shut up!
**[07:25] ---**
Anyway, how are things on your end?
**[07:32] ---**
I have arrived.
***SIGN*** KEEP OUT
**[07:39] ---**
At the spiritual hotspot.
**[07:44] ---**
Now, I'll go and prove it right now...
**[07:47] ---**
that there are no such things as ghosts!
**[07:49] ---**
*Hey, you aren't freaking out, are you?*
**[07:52] ---**
*By the way, that spot is famous on the 'net
for something definitely being there.*
**[08:10] ---**
Too shy, shy boy, in this moment!
**[08:14] ---**
*They say speaking loudly
is the most dangerous thing to do.*
**[08:17] ---**
Too shy, shy boy...
**[08:19] ---**
*On the 'net.*
**[08:20] ---**
You've been mentioning the 'net a lot.
**[08:22] ---**
So have you seen a ghost, Miss Ayase?
**[08:25] ---**
*Nope.*
**[08:26] ---**
What?
**[08:28] ---**
*How dare you talk so authoritatively earlier!*
**[08:30] ---**
My bad!
**[08:32] ---**
*Take back that attitude
you've been giving me!*
**[08:33] ---**
*It's absurd that you've never
seen a ghost but believe in them!*
**[08:37] ---**
It's not absurd.
**[08:39] ---**
I told you my grandma's a spirit medium.
**[08:43] ---**
I love my grandma a lot
since I don't have parents.
**[08:46] ---**
So, I see.
**[08:50] ---**
Why are you getting all meek and stuff?
**[08:53] ---**
Get a load of this.
My family is seriously weird.
**[08:58] ---**
I always had to perform
a good luck ritual before stepping outside.
**[09:02] ---**
I was always forced to do it
the entire way to school.
**[09:06] ---**
And of course,
I was the laughingstock of all the boys.
**[09:09] ---**
If I don't do it, Grandma got pissed.
It was the pits.
**[09:14] ---**
But the toughest part of it all...
**[09:17] ---**
was when the boy I liked
made fun of me.
**[09:21] ---**
I really hated my grandma.
**[09:23] ---**
"Because of that weird ritual,
the boy I like hates me."
**[09:28] ---**
I think I said something horrible
like that to Grandma.
**[09:32] ---**
Since then, I didn't talk to Grandma until recently,
and I stopped doing the ritual.
**[09:38] ---**
But you know, I get pissed when someone else
makes fun of my family.
**[09:45] ---**
That's when I realized...
**[09:47] ---**
I didn't hate the fact that
the boy I liked didn't like me.
**[09:51] ---**
I hated the fact that the boy I liked
made fun of my grandma.
**[09:57] ---**
In reality, I loved both Grandma and her job
as a spirit medium, because it felt special.
**[10:03] ---**
How she decided to take me in,
and lovingly raised me all by herself...
**[10:08] ---**
I have faith in my grandma.
**[10:11] ---**
That's why I believe in ghosts.
**[10:15] ---**
So anyway, why do you believe in aliens?
**[10:20] ---**
That really doesn't matter, right?
**[10:23] ---**
What's with that?
You don't have any reasons?
**[10:25] ---**
Do you need a reason to like something?
**[10:28] ---**
Well, you have a point.
**[10:30] ---**
More like, Occult-kun,
you sure talk bluntly over the phone.
**[10:37] ---**
I-Is that so?
**[10:40] ---**
Miss Ayase, you're pretty easy to talk to.
**[10:52] ---**
I'll let you suckle my teats, so...
**[10:56] ---**
lemme gobble that weenie.
**[11:00] ---**
Ghost!
**[11:01] ---**
*Hold on! You shouldn't run there!*
**[11:04] ---**
*Hey, Occult-kun!*
**[11:05] ---**
No way! Impossible!
That was just an ordinary granny!
**[11:06] ---**
*Oc... kun... Stop right now!*
**[11:08] ---**
That's probably it. Just an ordinary granny!
**[11:10] ---**
*They say on the 'net she's bad news!*
**[11:15] ---**
I'm pretty sure I misunderstood something.
**[11:17] ---**
I simply bumped into a lewd granny!
**[11:21] ---**
*They say you can't let her outrun you
at any cost!*
**[11:25] ---**
*If you lose a race against
Turbo Granny, you'll be cursed!*
***SIGN*** OCCULT-KUN
***SIGN*** OCCULT-KUN
**[11:35] ---**
Hey, Occult-kun! Are you listening?
**[11:37] ---**
Hello? Answer me!
**[11:39] ---**
You're kidding me, right?
**[11:41] ---**
I'll head over there right now!
Just hang on!
**[11:54] ---**
What are those things?
Seriously, cut it out.
**[12:05] ---**
Hello, woman person.
**[12:08] ---**
We are Serpoians. We are called that
because we come from the planet Serpo.
**[12:13] ---**
Aliens?
**[12:15] ---**
Don't be afraid. We are a friendly people.
**[12:18] ---**
Friendly guys
don't strip girls naked, you know!
**[12:22] ---**
Where are my clothes?
**[12:23] ---**
We have taken proper care
of your belongings.
**[12:26] ---**
They're all tattered! Pay for damages!
**[12:28] ---**
And I wanna go home,
so can you take this off?
**[12:31] ---**
Our kind only has males.
**[12:34] ---**
Thus, we reproduce
through clone technology.
**[12:37] ---**
Are you even listening?
**[12:39] ---**
However, identical units
do not instigate biological evolution.
**[12:43] ---**
Conflict, as well as basic emotions,
were annihilated.
**[12:47] ---**
Therefore, for us to regain
reproductive function similar to humans,
**[12:50] ---**
we want your "bananas."
**[12:54] ---**
We will now have sex.
**[12:56] ---**
After having sex with you, we will extract
your uterus and your banana for research.
**[13:00] ---**
Gimme a break!
**[13:01] ---**
I did date a douchebag,
but I didn't let him take my virginity!
**[13:06] ---**
My chastity has been saved
for a Ken Takakura I have yet to meet!
**[13:09] ---**
No way some creepy alien
is gonna take it from me!
**[13:19] ---**
In order to arouse your desire, we will use
psychokinesis to control your brain waves.
**[13:26] ---**
How is it? Isn't the temperature
of your body getting warmer?
**[13:35] ---**
What's this?
She is resisting the psychokinesis.
**[13:38] ---**
What incredible spiritual power.
**[13:40] ---**
However...
**[13:42] ---**
Let us begin.
**[13:43] ---**
No...
**[13:45] ---**
Stop!
**[13:52] ---**
A phone call?
**[13:53] ---**
Someone sure has
a really bad sense of timing.
**[14:23] ---**
Miss Ayase! I'm sorry!
**[14:25] ---**
There was a ghost!
**[14:27] ---**
Turbo Granny has cursed me!
**[14:30] ---**
Occult-kun! I'm glad!
Can you help me?
**[14:33] ---**
Who are you?
**[14:34] ---**
Infiltrating using a smartphone.
Not even we have technology like that.
**[14:38] ---**
Please help! I can't control myself!
**[14:45] ---**
Lemme gobble that weenie!
**[14:47] ---**
Come on, get a grip!
**[14:49] ---**
Man person over there.
**[14:50] ---**
We did not authorize your intrusion.
**[14:53] ---**
Leave immediately, or else...
**[15:00] ---**
Please give us your "banana."
**[15:02] ---**
Gross!
**[15:02] ---**
Six Sense Organs!
**[15:06] ---**
So fast! I cannot set my psychokinesis.
**[15:11] ---**
Our cherished bananas!
**[15:14] ---**
You banana thief!
**[15:15] ---**
Serpoian Form Serpo-Grammetry!
**[15:19] ---**
Occult-kun!
**[15:20] ---**
We have never encountered
someone so aggressive.
**[15:23] ---**
We have an amiable relationship
with humans. So give us your bananas.
**[15:28] ---**
I'll give it to you! Anything if it's mine!
**[15:30] ---**
I've been wanting to see aliens
for the longest time!
**[15:33] ---**
Because I didn't have any friends,
I thought at least aliens would be my friends.
**[15:38] ---**
I've been calling to the skies
for a UFO since grade school!
**[15:44] ---**
But you never came!
**[15:46] ---**
No matter how much I called for you,
you never showed up!
**[15:50] ---**
Other humans bullied me to pass their time.
***SIGN*** COURAGE
**[15:53] ---**
Aliens don't give me the time of day.
**[15:55] ---**
Nobody ever acknowledged my existence.
**[15:59] ---**
But Miss Ayase....
**[16:01] ---**
She actually stood up for me, despite that!
**[16:04] ---**
So don't you lay a finger on her!
**[16:08] ---**
I won't allow anyone to hurt her!
**[16:12] ---**
If it's for her sake,
I'll even become a monster!
**[16:17] ---**
Keep at it, Occult-kun!
**[16:19] ---**
Show 'em what a man you are!
**[16:21] ---**
Fie!
**[16:24] ---**
Miss Ayase...
**[16:25] ---**
It looks impossible after all.
**[16:27] ---**
You gave up really fast there!
**[16:30] ---**
We cannot become friends
with a violent person like you.
**[16:34] ---**
Besides, we like woman persons
more than man persons.
**[16:39] ---**
Now, once again,
I shall arouse your desire.
**[16:47] ---**
*Take your chi out.*
**[16:48] ---**
*I don't wanna.*
**[16:49] ---**
My friends make fun of me
every single day because of that.
**[16:54] ---**
What are you talking about?
**[16:55] ---**
If you have your chi out,
you won't get hurt or sick.
**[16:58] ---**
Bad things can't get near you.
**[17:01] ---**
First, firm up your lower abs.
**[17:06] ---**
Imagine having your chi shoot up
from the top of your head.
**[17:11] ---**
*She's doing it again!*
**[17:12] ---**
*Is she communicating
with aliens or something?*
**[17:16] ---**
I hate it! I'm never doing it again!
**[17:18] ---**
Momo! Hold on!
**[17:20] ---**
I hate you, Grandma!
You fake spirit medium!
**[17:26] ---**
*Why am I remembering the past right now?*
**[17:30] ---**
*I'm sorry, Grandma.
I just felt embarrassed back then.*
**[17:36] ---**
*Firm up your lower abs.*
**[17:41] ---**
*Chi shoot up from the top of your head.*
**[17:48] ---**
No way!
**[17:49] ---**
What?
**[17:50] ---**
Miss Ayase, you can use psychic powers?
**[17:53] ---**
Well, I'm surprised by that myself!
**[17:55] ---**
Unbelievable!
My psychokinesis is being pushed back!
**[17:59] ---**
Why?
**[18:00] ---**
Did I stimulate her brain waves too much
and cause the woman person's chakra to open up?
**[18:06] ---**
She was real.
**[18:07] ---**
Grandma was a real spirit medium!
**[18:10] ---**
Thank you, Grandma!
**[18:12] ---**
With this I can take those scumbags...
**[18:16] ---**
and send them flying!
**[18:33] ---**
What is this? That was a UFO?
**[18:36] ---**
Occult-kun, are you okay?
**[18:37] ---**
Let's get outta here!
**[18:43] ---**
Ow! What are you doing, idiot!
Regain your sanity already!
**[18:48] ---**
Damn you!
**[18:56] ---**
Turbo Granny?
**[18:57] ---**
Who the hell are you?
**[19:03] ---**
His curse hasn't lifted!
**[19:05] ---**
Granny is out of his body, though!
**[19:07] ---**
I have possession of that kid's weenie.
**[19:10] ---**
As long as I have his weenie,
that kid's curse won't be lifted.
**[19:15] ---**
If you want it back,
come to the tunnel.
**[19:18] ---**
This place is too far for me.
**[19:20] ---**
I'll take you on as much as you want
if it's in the tunnel, gaudy hag.
**[19:25] ---**
Who you calling a gaudy hag,
you old bag of crap!
**[19:27] ---**
Give him back his thingy!
**[19:32] ---**
Crap! If we don't escape,
we're gonna die!
**[19:35] ---**
Get a grip, you idiot!
We're gonna escape!
**[19:58] ---**
This is the worst.
**[20:01] ---**
I'll believe in aliens.
Like, I was kidnapped and all.
**[20:05] ---**
I'll believe in ghosts, too.
I got cursed after all.
**[20:08] ---**
So, what should we do from here?
**[20:11] ---**
What should we do?
**[20:13] ---**
You lose control of yourself if I don't
hold the curse back with psychic powers.
**[20:17] ---**
I'm sorry.
**[20:17] ---**
I lost my uniform, my wallet,
my smartphone. Everything.
**[20:22] ---**
How can I be lifted from this curse?
**[20:25] ---**
You have to beat the crap out of Turbo Granny.
She's the cause of the curse.
**[20:29] ---**
I see. Then I'll head on over there.
**[20:33] ---**
Huh? Right now?
**[20:36] ---**
Miss Ayase, please wear
my clothes back home.
**[20:39] ---**
Hold on! You'll lose control without me!
**[20:45] ---**
All of this happened
because of what I did.
**[20:50] ---**
I can't get you involved
in it anymore, Miss Ayase.
**[20:53] ---**
I'll use willpower to make it to the tunnel,
and then make it work somehow.
**[20:58] ---**
Why can't you ask me to come with you?
**[21:01] ---**
After that experience earlier,
I can't leave you alone!
**[21:03] ---**
You would've died earlier if I wasn't around!
**[21:08] ---**
Is it okay for you
to help someone like me?
**[21:12] ---**
Stuff like that is such a hassle.
**[21:22] ---**
Come on, put some clothes on.
**[21:26] ---**
Let's go!
**[21:28] ---**
I'm sorry.
**[21:29] ---**
I am an awkward fellow, after all.
**[21:33] ---**
Miss Ayase, please put some clothes on.
**[21:35] ---**
If you don't, I can't bring myself
to speak properly.
**[21:39] ---**
*No way. Why is my heart racing?*
**[21:42] ---**
*This can't be.*
**[21:44] ---**
*I was just surprised because he happened
to recite one of Ken Takakura's lines.*
**[21:48] ---**
*I need to calm down for now.*
**[21:53] ---**
By the way, what's your name?
**[21:55] ---**
I'm terrible at remembering names.
**[21:58] ---**
Oh? Um...
**[22:00] ---**
I'm Ken Takakura.
***SIGN*** DAN
***SIGN*** DAN DA
***SIGN*** DAN DA DAN
**[23:42] ---**
Aliens really did exist!
**[23:44] ---**
Ghosts exist, too!
**[23:45] ---**
The existence of aliens and ghosts
being proven means that
**[23:48] ---**
there's a possibility of supernatural
phenomena, UMA,
**[23:49] ---**
and all other things that were said to be absurd
can be proven as well.
**[23:50] ---**
Oh, fine, I get it! Ready.
***SIGN*** EPISODE 2 THAT'S A SPACE ALIEN, AIN'T IT?
**[23:52] ---**
Next episode,
"That's a Space Alien, Ain't It?!"
**[23:53] ---**
Next episode,
"That's a Space Alien, Ain't It?!"
**[23:55] ---**
Hey, be in sync with me!
# 2 - That's a Space Alien, Ain't It?!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] ---**
No way! I refuse to accept that!
**[00:02] ---**
I don't understand.
**[00:04] ---**
Accept it or not, I am Ken Takakura.
**[00:08] ---**
Stop it!
**[00:09] ---**
I don't wanna hear it!
**[00:10] ---**
Crap! The curse!
**[00:12] ---**
Miss Ayase! Hurry!
Your psychic powers!
**[00:14] ---**
Lemme gobble that weenie!
**[00:27] ---**
Th-Thank you very much.
**[00:31] ---**
Let's set a few rules.
**[00:33] ---**
No speaking your name.
**[00:37] ---**
Okay.
**[00:50] ---**
Because you like the occult, you're Okarun.
**[00:53] ---**
O-Okarun.
**[00:56] ---**
If you use that name, I'll kill you.
**[00:59] ---**
"That name"? It's my own name.
**[01:03] ---**
Well, I guess I have no choice,
so that's fine.
**[01:07] ---**
You don't seem that upset about it,
Okarun!
**[01:10] ---**
What? This is against my will!
**[01:12] ---**
Hey, lemme see your face!
**[01:16] ---**
You're looking happy, Okarun!
**[01:25] ---**
Stinky!
**[01:27] ---**
You farted in front of my face!
You're the worst!
**[01:30] ---**
It's because you're
putting pressure on me, Miss Ayase!
**[01:35] ---**
Hold on a sec! It's already morning!
**[01:39] ---**
That means Turbo Granny
won't come out anymore?
**[01:42] ---**
Huh? Is that true?
**[01:45] ---**
I mean, ghosts show up at night, right?
**[01:49] ---**
Why don't you come to my place for now?
**[01:53] ---**
That outfit...
**[01:56] ---**
is scarier than a ghost.
***SIGN*** EPISODE 2 THAT'S A SPACE ALIEN, AIN'T IT?!
**[03:39] ---**
My Grandma's really hard on guys,
so be careful.
**[03:42] ---**
She almost killed a previous boyfriend.
**[03:44] ---**
Huh? You wait till now to say that?
**[03:53] ---**
What's going on?
**[04:02] ---**
Okarun! Are you okay?
**[04:11] ---**
Must be this.
***SIGN*** PEACEFUL PROSPEROUS FAMILY WARD AGAINST EVIL AND MISFORTUNE
**[04:12] ---**
Sorry, Okarun!
**[04:14] ---**
A barrier's been put up!
**[04:19] ---**
I thought I was gonna die.
**[04:25] ---**
Okay, now try coming in!
**[04:27] ---**
Is it really gonna be okay?
**[04:29] ---**
If you burn, I'll toss you
into the river again, so it's okay.
**[04:53] ---**
Whoa. Freaky.
**[04:55] ---**
You're safe!
**[04:58] ---**
How do you feel?
**[04:59] ---**
Any changes?
**[05:00] ---**
My entire body tingles.
**[05:03] ---**
More like, what's with your head?
**[05:06] ---**
Totally hilarious! It's a granny perm!
**[05:10] ---**
Freaky! What are you laughing about?
**[05:12] ---**
I was about to die there!
**[05:17] ---**
Grandma!
**[05:20] ---**
Huh? Grandma's not here.
**[05:23] ---**
Oh well. Come on up.
**[05:27] ---**
E-Excuse me.
**[05:35] ---**
Hold on a minute.
**[05:37] ---**
I'll change clothes, so close the door.
**[05:39] ---**
Oh, okay.
**[05:45] ---**
Miss Ayase! The curse!
**[05:47] ---**
Hey! Don't just open the door!
**[05:51] ---**
Face the wall!
***SIGN*** STAY OUT
**[05:56] ---**
I-I'm sorry.
**[05:58] ---**
Sheesh, what a pain.
**[06:20] ---**
Okarun, put these on.
**[06:22] ---**
It's ladieswear but it should be okay.
**[06:25] ---**
Sorry to trouble you.
**[06:27] ---**
By the way, you don't have
anything down there, do you?
**[06:31] ---**
What? What do you mean?
**[06:34] ---**
I'm sorry! I didn't look!
**[06:36] ---**
It's fine now.
**[06:44] ---**
Hey, hey.
**[06:49] ---**
Show me what's down there.
**[06:50] ---**
Turbo Granny was saying that you're cursed
because your weenie has been taken.
**[06:58] ---**
It's gone!
**[06:59] ---**
What? No way!
What's it look like? Show me!
**[07:03] ---**
I can't show you! Are you stupid?
**[07:05] ---**
But there's nothing there, right?
**[07:07] ---**
The issue isn't whether or not it's there!
**[07:09] ---**
Man, you're so cheap.
**[07:11] ---**
This is the worst!
**[07:13] ---**
What are we gonna do about this?
**[07:15] ---**
It's not there!
**[07:16] ---**
Don't make it sound like I'm the villain.
**[07:18] ---**
You're the one who challenged me!
**[07:21] ---**
Huh?
**[07:22] ---**
I wasn't interested
in your occult stories to begin with!
**[07:25] ---**
I only picked a fight
because you kept talking to me!
**[07:33] ---**
I didn't want to miss my chance.
**[07:38] ---**
I've always wanted a friend.
**[07:43] ---**
So I thought,
I didn't want to miss this chance.
**[07:49] ---**
That's why I so desperately
started talking to you.
**[07:59] ---**
But in the end...
**[08:01] ---**
You live in a different world, Miss Ayase.
**[08:05] ---**
You're not someone that a person like me
should be talking to.
**[08:09] ---**
I'm so sorry...
**[08:12] ---**
that I roped you into so much danger.
**[08:15] ---**
When this is all over,
you can just ignore me again.
**[08:20] ---**
That's the annoying part about you.
**[08:23] ---**
You assume how others feel
and jump to conclusions without asking.
**[08:28] ---**
The reason you don't have friends
is because you shove them away.
**[08:38] ---**
Don't say that I can ignore you.
**[08:41] ---**
We can just talk about
the occult like normal.
**[08:51] ---**
Hey, say something.
**[08:55] ---**
Poke, poke.
**[09:00] ---**
You're so ugly!
**[09:01] ---**
Huh?
**[09:02] ---**
What did you just say, punk?
**[09:04] ---**
You are completely tactless, Miss Ayase!
**[09:06] ---**
You bluntly recite people's weaknesses!
**[09:08] ---**
What the hell is tact?
**[09:14] ---**
Perhaps your grandmother is back?
**[09:17] ---**
Shh! Stay quiet.
**[09:19] ---**
I've never heard a doorbell like this.
**[09:22] ---**
What do you mean?
**[09:24] ---**
Grandma told me in the past...
**[09:26] ---**
that we have two doorbells.
**[09:28] ---**
One is for humans,
**[09:31] ---**
and the other is for...
**[09:33] ---**
evil spirits.
**[09:34] ---**
Crap! It's because I took that talisman off!
**[09:38] ---**
*It's okay if it's for a little bit, right?*
**[09:44] ---**
Oh, no!
**[09:45] ---**
There's something out there!
What are we gonna do?
**[09:47] ---**
I'll put the talisman back up!
**[09:49] ---**
If it's an evil spirit,
it'll burn up like you did, right?
**[09:51] ---**
Are you going to burn me, too?
**[09:53] ---**
You can just get outside of our plot!
**[09:56] ---**
Please wait to put up the talisman
until I step outside!
**[10:03] ---**
It's gone. Where did it go?
**[10:06] ---**
Miss Ayase! Look at this!
**[10:17] ---**
Crap! Crap!
**[10:18] ---**
We gotta leave the plot now!
**[10:20] ---**
Go that way! Hurry!
**[10:21] ---**
- Miss Ayase!
- What!?
**[10:25] ---**
We can't get out.
**[10:29] ---**
We're trapped inside by a wall.
**[10:31] ---**
The torii gate!
I can attach the talisman!
**[10:33] ---**
Please wait!
You can't put the talisman up!
**[10:36] ---**
Why not?
**[10:37] ---**
The torii gate is embedded into the wall!
**[10:39] ---**
We can't leave the plot like this!
**[10:42] ---**
What should we do?
If we don't do anything, we're seriously...
**[10:49] ---**
What is this?
**[10:54] ---**
We're in serious trouble!
**[10:56] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[11:02] ---**
Help... me...
**[11:04] ---**
Okarun, are you okay?
Get a grip on yourself!
**[11:07] ---**
Blood!
**[11:15] ---**
Black fog. So it's because of that.
**[11:28] ---**
Found... you...
**[11:34] ---**
You are evil people.
You broke the promise.
**[12:26] ---**
Give me...
**[12:30] ---**
your banana organ!
**[12:37] ---**
Crap! What's with that evil spirit?
**[12:40] ---**
Wait, you have another one down there?
**[12:43] ---**
Of course not!
**[12:44] ---**
That's an alien!
**[12:46] ---**
Huh?
**[12:46] ---**
There's no doubt about it! That collar!
**[12:49] ---**
That's a Flatwoods Monster!
**[12:51] ---**
They were first witnessed in a town
in America called Flatwoods.
**[12:55] ---**
In Japan, they've been sighted in Yamanashi.
**[12:57] ---**
They're known as aliens
who are three meters tall.
**[13:00] ---**
Then what was that doorbell?
**[13:02] ---**
You're saying a chime specifically for ghosts
reacted to an alien?
**[13:06] ---**
There are studies that say people who see
spiritual phenomena often see UFOs as well!
**[13:17] ---**
In other words, there might be something
in common between ghosts and aliens!
**[13:21] ---**
Is that a buddy of the aliens
from yesterday? They're so persistent!
**[13:25] ---**
If we don't hurry up and do something
about that thing, the poison fog will kill us!
**[13:29] ---**
But if I'm holding Okarun's curse back,
I can't use my psychic powers well.
**[13:33] ---**
Miss Ayase.
**[13:48] ---**
Sheesh, what a pain!
**[13:55] ---**
Huh?
**[13:57] ---**
Sheesh!
**[14:20] ---**
Miss Ayase.
**[14:21] ---**
What is it now?
**[14:23] ---**
I will fight.
**[14:26] ---**
Please release the curse!
**[14:28] ---**
What's this so suddenly?
**[14:30] ---**
I'm not afraid of aliens!
**[14:32] ---**
Can you release just the physical curse
while keeping my head in check?
**[14:49] ---**
You make it sound easy, but I haven't learned
how to control this power!
**[14:53] ---**
If all goes well, we might be able
to control that Granny's powers!
**[14:57] ---**
I'm not sure if I can do it right!
**[14:59] ---**
Please try!
**[15:14] ---**
- Miss Ayase! Here it comes!
- Give it to me!
**[15:17] ---**
Please hurry!
**[15:35] ---**
This is amazing.
**[15:37] ---**
I'm brimming with power!
**[15:40] ---**
But I'm totally depressed.
**[15:42] ---**
Whoa! Is his psyche broken?
**[15:44] ---**
My conscious is clear, yo...
But I totally have the blues, yo...
**[15:49] ---**
What's with that manner of speech?
**[15:52] ---**
Oh, sorry.
**[15:53] ---**
I am an awkward fellow after all, yo...
**[15:56] ---**
I told you not to say that!
**[15:58] ---**
I should just, yo...
Eradicate myself, yo?
**[16:02] ---**
Stop talking like that! It pisses me off!
**[16:06] ---**
I'll be back in a little bit.
**[16:08] ---**
I'm sure it won't work, yo...
**[16:11] ---**
Hey!
**[16:12] ---**
Look ahead! In front of you!
**[16:20] ---**
My body moved outta reflex.
**[16:24] ---**
So this is Turbo Granny's powers?
**[16:28] ---**
I feel so dejected.
**[16:33] ---**
So fast. When'd he learn to do that?
**[16:39] ---**
This is amazing! Maybe we can do this!
**[16:49] ---**
Wait, what's going on?
**[16:58] ---**
Okarun!
**[17:04] ---**
Give it to me!
**[17:05] ---**
Crap!
**[17:11] ---**
Okarun, are you okay?
**[17:13] ---**
I'm sorry, Miss Ayase!
**[17:15] ---**
My body can't keep up
with the power of the curse!
**[17:18] ---**
My entire body feels like
it's going to burst into a million pieces!
**[17:21] ---**
This isn't a speed that humans can move in!
**[17:24] ---**
But I've only damaged
five fingers from that thing!
**[17:28] ---**
How the hell are we gonna defeat
something like that?
**[17:30] ---**
Like I know! Don't get pissed at me!
**[17:33] ---**
If we knew how to defeat it,
we wouldn't be struggling!
**[17:40] ---**
That thing...
**[17:42] ---**
Is it sumo wrestling?
**[17:44] ---**
Come again?
**[17:46] ---**
If we can get its hand
to touch the ground, maybe we win?
**[17:50] ---**
Miss Ayase, are you a genius?
**[17:53] ---**
I knew I was.
**[17:54] ---**
Next time is my limit, okay?
**[17:58] ---**
Okarun, aim for the legs.
**[18:00] ---**
I'll make the thing trip
with my psychic powers!
**[18:03] ---**
Man, I'm so depressed.
**[18:05] ---**
We have to get a bit closer,
so you have to back me up!
**[18:09] ---**
What a pain.
**[18:10] ---**
Give me your banana!
**[18:20] ---**
I can't take it anymore!
**[18:21] ---**
Hold back the curse with my right hand,
**[18:23] ---**
and I'll take on this guy with my left hand!
**[18:26] ---**
What a pain!
**[18:28] ---**
Oh, hold on.
**[18:29] ---**
Sorry, Okarun!
**[18:35] ---**
All right! The hand is melting!
**[18:37] ---**
Just like how we planned!
**[18:44] ---**
You're kidding.
**[18:46] ---**
Miss Ayase, run for it!
**[18:57] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[19:01] ---**
Crap. This is bad news.
**[19:07] ---**
I'm back.
**[19:08] ---**
Sheesh. You really are a nuisance.
**[19:14] ---**
Hey, sumo alien!
**[19:17] ---**
You put your hand on the ground.
**[19:20] ---**
That's cheating, you scumbag.
**[19:22] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[19:23] ---**
Please release the curse one more time!
**[19:25] ---**
I don't care what happens to my body!
**[19:28] ---**
I'm gonna beat the crap outta this thing!
**[19:31] ---**
You sit and watch, Okarun!
**[19:33] ---**
I can't let cheaters off the hook!
**[19:36] ---**
Wait, what are you saying?
**[19:39] ---**
You really pissed me off, wimpy alien.
**[19:46] ---**
Stop it!
**[19:48] ---**
That did nothing!
**[19:51] ---**
Please release my curse, Miss Ayase!
I'm begging you!
**[19:55] ---**
If this keeps up, you'll die!
**[19:59] ---**
This is fine.
**[20:03] ---**
This depth is great.
**[20:07] ---**
Because if I'm in this deep...
**[20:09] ---**
it means I'm outside of the torii gate!
***SIGN*** PEACEFUL PROSPEROUS FAMILY WARD AGAINST EVIL AND MISFORTUNE
**[20:57] ---**
We're back.
**[21:01] ---**
We're saved.
**[21:04] ---**
Okarun! We're back! See?
**[21:09] ---**
Oh, yes.
**[21:12] ---**
I really thought I was gonna die!
**[21:15] ---**
Oh! Miss Ayase, the curse!
**[21:18] ---**
Come on! Don't be a pain!
**[21:20] ---**
At least let me indulge in the moment!
**[21:23] ---**
You say that, but I can't
do anything about this.
**[21:26] ---**
What? You change your hairdo?
**[21:29] ---**
Of course not!
**[21:31] ---**
That kinda looks good.
I did prefer the granny perm, though.
**[21:36] ---**
But you made fun of it!
**[21:38] ---**
Huh? I'm kinda dizzy.
**[21:42] ---**
Oh, crap.
**[21:43] ---**
Huh?
**[21:44] ---**
Miss Ayase?
**[21:45] ---**
Get a hold of yourself! Miss Ayase!
**[23:43] ---**
In 1952, several boys and soldiers, as well as
their pet dog, encountered the Flatwoods Monster.
**[23:47] ---**
The granny perm
was better on you after all.
**[23:48] ---**
Back in those days, the local residents...
**[23:49] ---**
Are you listening to my story?
***SIGN*** EPISODE 3 IT'S A GRANNY VS. GRANNY CLASH!
**[23:51] ---**
Next episode:
"It's a Granny vs. Granny Clash!"
**[23:53] ---**
They're called "aliens who are
three meters tall" in Japan.
# 3 - It's a Granny vs. Granny Clash!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] ---**
Your age is 27?
**[00:04] ---**
I'm 20.
**[00:05] ---**
You have a wife and child?
**[00:06] ---**
I live alone.
**[00:08] ---**
You like curry?
**[00:09] ---**
I like ramen.
***SIGN*** CAN PSYCHIC POWERS EXPOSE?
**[00:15] ---**
Santa Dodoria sure is something.
**[00:17] ---**
So flamboyantly wrong.
**[00:19] ---**
There's no way such a young idol
could have a wife and a kid.
**[00:22] ---**
Even I can see that.
**[00:24] ---**
Is it okay to air that as-is?
**[00:27] ---**
Should be okay.
**[00:28] ---**
Nobody would be so pissed off
at a local program like this one.
***SIGN*** VACANT
***SIGN*** CARRYING PASSENGERS
**[00:44] ---**
You're Santa Dodoria, aren't you?
**[00:47] ---**
I saw you on TV the other day.
**[00:50] ---**
Do you really have psychic powers?
**[00:53] ---**
Here's fine. Drop me off.
**[00:56] ---**
Huh?
**[00:59] ---**
It's not like I'm trying to insult you
or anything. I just wanted you to show me.
**[01:04] ---**
If you don't wanna die,
hurry on and scram.
**[01:34] ---**
Come on now, I thought you brought over
yet another scumbag.
**[01:39] ---**
But this one isn't even human.
**[01:41] ---**
Sheesh. My grandkid
only brings problems in.
**[01:45] ---**
My skin's gonna get dry from all the stress.
**[01:50] ---**
Come on. Bring it on.
***SIGN*** EPISODE 3
IT'S A GRANNY VS. GRANNY CLASH!
**[03:32] ---**
That was close! You're super fast!
**[03:35] ---**
But things happened just as I predicted.
**[03:39] ---**
I thought you'd come around
to my blind spot.
**[03:43] ---**
You fell into the trap
that I had set up beforehand.
**[03:51] ---**
If you cross that line, you'll die.
**[03:55] ---**
That's a barrier right there.
**[03:59] ---**
When you drive a warding nail
inside this circle,
**[04:02] ---**
the inside of the circle
turns into a barrier.
**[04:04] ---**
But if you drive it outside the circle, the area
outside of the circle becomes the barrier.
**[04:09] ---**
The reason you couldn't touch me
was because I was protected by a barrier.
**[04:25] ---**
I'll make sure to eat and kill you.
**[04:28] ---**
Don't think you can keep me trapped forever.
**[04:32] ---**
I don't wanna trap you.
I wanna kill you.
**[04:44] ---**
Come on, stand your ground, will ya?
**[04:46] ---**
You're gonna cross that line!
**[04:51] ---**
What's wrong?
**[04:52] ---**
When you're in there, you can't make use
of your speed that you're so proud of.
**[04:56] ---**
You scummy old hag!
**[04:58] ---**
Did an old hag just call
another old hag a scummy old hag?
**[05:02] ---**
That pisses me off.
**[05:07] ---**
If you burn me,
this guy that I cursed will die, too.
**[05:14] ---**
I'll kill off all scumbags
who deceive my grandkid.
**[05:18] ---**
Even if they're human.
**[05:23] ---**
Bye.
**[05:24] ---**
Scummy old hag!
**[05:38] ---**
Okarun!
**[05:41] ---**
Hey, you were home?
**[05:42] ---**
Shut up. I'm watching
"Bakatono."
**[05:46] ---**
Anyway, I have something
to talk about with you.
**[05:49] ---**
You went to a spiritual hotspot?
**[05:53] ---**
I did.
**[05:54] ---**
Not me, but a friend.
**[05:57] ---**
Why?
**[05:59] ---**
"Why?"
**[06:00] ---**
Because we were talking
and that's how things ended up.
**[06:07] ---**
"Bakatono"
is Japan's national treasure.
**[06:09] ---**
Hey, were you listening?
**[06:12] ---**
Anyway, did you see a guy?
**[06:13] ---**
He'll be in big trouble
if I'm not around!
**[06:17] ---**
If you're talking about the evil spirit,
I killed it.
**[06:21] ---**
An evil spirit? What kind?
Did it have glasses on?
**[06:25] ---**
Come on, you don't even believe
in ghosts.
**[06:31] ---**
Besides, I'm a fake spirit medium.
**[06:37] ---**
How long are you gonna hold
that grudge, you scummy old hag.
**[06:39] ---**
Something really bad might happen,
so just answer me!
**[06:43] ---**
Stop it. Don't believe in those stories.
**[06:46] ---**
There are no evil spirits,
and I'm a fake.
**[06:55] ---**
Grandma.
**[07:01] ---**
I'm sorry. I was wrong.
**[07:04] ---**
So please tell me.
What did you do to the evil spirit?
**[07:09] ---**
Head over to the main shrine.
**[07:11] ---**
Scummy old hag!
**[07:13] ---**
If something's wrong with Okarun,
I'll never forgive you!
**[07:18] ---**
*I didn't want to miss my chance.*
**[07:21] ---**
*He was just an occult freak
who simply wanted friends.*
**[07:25] ---**
*It's my fault.*
**[07:27] ---**
*Because I forced him
to go to that place!*
**[07:30] ---**
*I'm sorry, Okarun!*
**[07:32] ---**
Okarun!
**[07:38] ---**
Miss Ayase! I'm so glad!
**[07:40] ---**
I thought that I'd murdered you
or something.
**[07:44] ---**
Huh?
**[07:45] ---**
Wait. Miss Ayase?
**[07:47] ---**
Miss Ayase?
**[07:49] ---**
You're still alive and well,
scumbag four-eyes!
**[07:52] ---**
What? What's up with that?
**[07:53] ---**
Well, I’m sorry I'm still alive!
**[07:58] ---**
I'm so irritated.
**[08:06] ---**
Since when have you
started being friends with monsters?
**[08:09] ---**
You scared me!
**[08:11] ---**
The curse won't kick in
as long as he's in there.
**[08:13] ---**
But one step outside,
and he's back to a monster.
**[08:17] ---**
What was that about killing him off?
You lied to me.
**[08:20] ---**
You seemed pretty desperate.
You into brats like that?
**[08:25] ---**
No way!
**[08:27] ---**
Turbo Granny took his you-know-what.
**[08:30] ---**
And she told me that as long as she has it,
his curse won't be lifted.
**[08:35] ---**
I'm responsible for what happened to him,
so I just want to do something about it.
**[08:40] ---**
Oh, I see. So you do like him.
**[08:42] ---**
I didn't say that!
**[08:44] ---**
Anyway, I can use psychic powers now.
**[08:48] ---**
What the hell are you talkin' about?
**[08:50] ---**
I went to this place where UFOs show up.
**[08:52] ---**
A lot of stuff happened there,
and now I can use powers.
**[08:55] ---**
But UFOs don't exist.
**[08:57] ---**
I totally get that reaction.
I was just like that until yesterday.
**[09:02] ---**
Anyway, it's true
that I can use psychic powers now.
**[09:05] ---**
And if I'm not holding back
Okarun's curse with it, he goes wild.
**[09:08] ---**
I'm sure psychic powers exist.
**[09:10] ---**
I don't know what your criteria
for believing stuff is.
**[09:13] ---**
Anyway, Turbo Granny, huh?
**[09:17] ---**
You sure got your hands
on a troublesome one.
**[09:20] ---**
In the past, she used to be called
Hundred Kilo Granny.
**[09:23] ---**
She's a modern yokai monster that
wreaked havoc all over the country.
**[09:27] ---**
And I heard such an elusive entity
had been dwelling for some time in that tunnel.
**[09:33] ---**
I went over there once to check things out.
***SIGN*** KEEP OUT
**[09:37] ---**
It was most strange.
**[09:39] ---**
I couldn't even get near the tunnel
**[09:41] ---**
because of just how strong
the spiritual power was.
**[09:45] ---**
You know about location-bound spirits?
**[09:48] ---**
They're spirits that stay in particular locations
that they have strong attachments to.
**[09:53] ---**
They're basically the strongest
within their territories.
**[09:57] ---**
No spirit medium would go up
against a location-bound spirit.
**[10:03] ---**
There was a location-bound spirit
inside that tunnel.
**[10:08] ---**
Do you know what that means?
**[10:14] ---**
Turbo Granny and that location-bound spirit
had fused together.
**[10:23] ---**
Don't try to fight against it.
**[10:26] ---**
I don't want to lose my dear grandchild.
**[10:32] ---**
You're not directly involved with it, either.
**[10:35] ---**
So forget about him.
**[10:39] ---**
You should return to everyday life.
**[10:43] ---**
I wonder what the Ken-san I love
would do in times like this.
**[10:48] ---**
When I can't decide, that's what I think.
**[10:52] ---**
I've never had regrets by choosing this way.
**[10:54] ---**
And if this was Ken-san,
I'm 100% positive he'd go in and help.
**[10:59] ---**
So that's what I'm gonna do!
**[11:02] ---**
Ken-san, you say?
**[11:05] ---**
- You're totally in love with that kid!
- No, that's not what I mean!
**[11:07] ---**
I wasn't talking about him!
**[11:09] ---**
Hey, she's confessing your love to you.
How do you feel?
**[11:12] ---**
I told you that's not what I mean!
I'm talking about the actor!
**[11:15] ---**
Looks like I got no choice
if you're gonna go that far.
**[11:20] ---**
Go play tag with Turbo Granny.
**[11:23] ---**
That thing has absolute confidence
in its running.
**[11:26] ---**
A few random taunts
and it's sure to take the challenge.
**[11:29] ---**
Now this is where the problem starts.
**[11:31] ---**
The location-bound spirit's territory
is all of Shono City.
**[11:34] ---**
You have to lure Turbo Granny outside
of the city without getting caught.
**[11:38] ---**
If you can drag it away from its territory,
**[11:40] ---**
it will get weak and even you guys
will be able to defeat it.
**[11:45] ---**
Oh no, look at these feeble legs.
**[11:47] ---**
There's no way in hell
I can play tag against Turbo Granny.
**[11:50] ---**
Instead of doing something like that,
**[11:52] ---**
can't you make something
like those barriers and deal with it?
***SIGN*** PEACEFUL PROSPEROUS FAMILY WARD AGAINST EVIL AND MISFORTUNE
**[11:54] ---**
Like putting one up at the tunnel.
**[11:58] ---**
I can't do that.
**[12:00] ---**
I can't help out to begin with.
**[12:02] ---**
Huh? What's up with that?
***SIGN*** KAMIGOE CITY
**[12:03] ---**
My barrier spells only borrow the powers
of the gods that live on this land.
**[12:08] ---**
Once we leave Kamigoe City where we live,
I can't use these powers.
**[12:13] ---**
Oh, so we have our own territory, too.
**[12:15] ---**
All lands have their own gods.
**[12:18] ---**
The problem is whether you're playing
a home or an away game.
**[12:21] ---**
In any case, this is the only way
to defeat Turbo Granny.
**[12:24] ---**
If you start physically training now,
**[12:26] ---**
you should be able to become
fast enough to run away from her.
**[12:28] ---**
Are you seriously saying that?
**[12:30] ---**
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't even
make it to the prefecture finals for track meets!
**[12:34] ---**
I'm not talking about you.
**[12:36] ---**
Huh?
**[12:37] ---**
- I'm talking about him.
- Oh, I see!
**[12:40] ---**
You're finally including me
into the conversation?
**[12:43] ---**
Sorry, I forgot.
**[12:45] ---**
But Okarun, you have no stamina.
**[12:47] ---**
None at all.
**[12:48] ---**
And I have to keep control over your curse.
**[12:51] ---**
Then he needs to run piggy-backing Momo.
**[12:53] ---**
Miss Ayase, how much do you weigh?
**[12:55] ---**
Hey, do ya wanna die?
**[12:57] ---**
Oh no, it's just impossible!
**[12:59] ---**
My limit for going full strength
in cursed mode is about twice!
**[13:02] ---**
Right!
**[13:04] ---**
Then train so that you can
always be at full strength.
**[13:06] ---**
Get to it. Push-ups, sit-ups, back extensions,
and squats. Five sets, 100 reps each.
**[13:10] ---**
- Huh?
- Do it.
**[13:11] ---**
And Momo, same goes
for your psychic powers.
**[13:14] ---**
You need to power it up
more than what it is now.
**[13:19] ---**
As I can't be of any help,
you guys simply have to get stronger.
**[13:24] ---**
So I will be training the two of you.
**[13:27] ---**
Go to sleep for today.
We'll start tomorrow.
**[13:30] ---**
Four-eyes, start your physical training
right now.
**[13:32] ---**
Oh, okay.
**[13:35] ---**
Your granny is so young.
**[13:38] ---**
Isn't she annoying?
**[13:43] ---**
Miss Ayase, I'm so sorry.
**[13:47] ---**
When I fought that big thing,
**[13:50] ---**
I was honestly too desperate
to think of anyone other than myself.
**[13:54] ---**
I'm really sorry.
**[13:56] ---**
Oh, there's nothing
you could've done about that.
**[13:58] ---**
But Miss Ayase, you were different.
**[14:01] ---**
You saved me and defeated the monster.
**[14:05] ---**
But if something like that happens again,
I'll do my best so that I can save you.
**[14:12] ---**
So please don't be disappointed with me.
**[14:15] ---**
Please, don't stop being a friend.
**[14:20] ---**
I wouldn't be disappointed.
You're overthinking.
**[14:25] ---**
Then why did you slam the door earlier?
**[14:28] ---**
W-Well, that was...
**[14:29] ---**
See, there you go!
You really were disappointed!
**[14:32] ---**
I said I wasn't!
**[14:34] ---**
But like, I am right now!
You're such a pain!
**[14:37] ---**
I'm sorry.
**[14:39] ---**
You were pretty awesome
when you were fighting.
**[14:43] ---**
But you're kinda dense, Okarun.
I'll probably be saving you next time, too!
**[14:50] ---**
You sleep there for today.
**[14:51] ---**
I'll bring you a futon right now.
**[14:58] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[15:01] ---**
Um, well...
**[15:06] ---**
I'm...
**[15:09] ---**
really thirsty,
so can I have some water?
**[15:14] ---**
Can I take this barley tea?
**[15:17] ---**
Sure thing.
**[15:19] ---**
*We have some shocking news
that just came in!*
***SIGN*** NEWS FLASH! SHOMA (20) SECRET CHILD SCANDAL SHOCKING - POPULAR IDOL SHOMA (20) MAY HAVE A SECRET CHILD. AGENCY HAS ADMITTED.
**[15:21] ---**
*It came out into the open
that popular idol Shoma had a secret child!*
**[15:25] ---**
*And his age wasn't 20, but actually 27!*
**[15:29] ---**
They need to correct his favorite food
from ramen to curry, too!
***SIGN*** NEWS FLASH - SHOMA (20) SECRET CHILD FOUND
**[15:35] ---**
*Furthermore...*
**[15:35] ---**
*...he and his partner...*
***SIGN*** [LIVE] EMERGENCY SHOMA (20) A SECRET CHILD?
**[15:37] ---**
*...have not...*
***SIGN*** BROADCAST SHOMA (20) SECRET CHILD PRESS CONFERENCE
**[15:37] ---**
*...formally submitted...*
***SIGN*** POPULAR IDOL'S SECRET CHILD FOUND SHOMA (20) ADMITS
**[15:38] ---**
*...a marriage license.*
***SIGN*** NEWS FLASH! POPULAR IDOL'S SHOCKING TRUTH... AGENCY HOLDS EMERGENCY CONFERENCE
**[15:44] ---**
I couldn't care less about that news.
**[15:48] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[15:50] ---**
Crap! Okarun wants to go
to the bathroom!
**[15:54] ---**
Just go.
**[15:55] ---**
No, but this is seriously bad news!
**[15:57] ---**
If something blocks my view and
I can't see Okarun, my spell on him breaks!
**[16:01] ---**
In other words, I have to watch Okarun
as he relieves himself!
**[16:04] ---**
Then watch him.
**[16:05] ---**
I'd never want to watch!
**[16:07] ---**
Who would show you, anyway?
**[16:09] ---**
That tramples upon someone else's dignity!
**[16:11] ---**
Hey! Don't look away!
**[16:16] ---**
Don't you have any good ideas?
**[16:18] ---**
Dunno.
**[16:19] ---**
How the hell are you holding
the curse back to begin with, anyway?
**[16:23] ---**
Let's see...
**[16:24] ---**
How do I put it...
**[16:25] ---**
It's like I can see an aura around Okarun.
**[16:28] ---**
An aura?
**[16:29] ---**
And when I crush that aura
with my hands, the aura shrinks.
**[16:35] ---**
And the curse subsides, I guess?
**[16:38] ---**
Everyone has some kind of aura,
and they come in all sorts of colors.
**[16:41] ---**
I see them on the trees
and rocks there too.
**[16:44] ---**
I can grab all those auras and move them
at my will, though only in a small area.
**[16:49] ---**
I see. I thought psychic powers
were a lot more omnipotent.
**[16:53] ---**
Sounds like it's quite limited.
**[16:57] ---**
It was a lot more amazing the moment
the powers awoke inside of me.
**[17:01] ---**
That was when everything I imagined
turned into reality, like I was invincible!
**[17:06] ---**
But that went away real quick.
I can only grab auras and stuff now.
**[17:11] ---**
Momo, close your eyes for a bit.
**[17:13] ---**
No way. If I do that,
my spell will be lifted.
**[17:16] ---**
Basically, the problem
is the reliance on your vision.
**[17:19] ---**
Try using all of your senses, such as touch.
**[17:23] ---**
The fact that you can grab the aura
means that it's tactile.
**[17:27] ---**
So close those eyes
and try feeling the aura with your skin.
**[17:33] ---**
Slowly, feel it around you.
**[17:40] ---**
So cold.
**[17:42] ---**
How am I doing?
**[17:43] ---**
Yeah.
**[17:45] ---**
He's transformed.
**[17:46] ---**
No good.
**[17:47] ---**
Well, crap.
**[17:48] ---**
That really pushed me close to the limit!
I won't last much longer!
**[17:52] ---**
What are you gonna do, Momo?
He's gonna poop any moment.
**[17:55] ---**
You're the one who told me to try that!
**[17:56] ---**
I don't want to be watched
as I relieve myself!
**[17:59] ---**
But I wanna pee in my pants even less!
**[18:02] ---**
Hold on!
**[18:03] ---**
I'm gonna borrow your bathro—
**[18:06] ---**
You've got some nerve to take a dump
in someone else's house, punk!
**[18:10] ---**
I'm pretty desperate too, you know!
**[18:12] ---**
Why you little...
**[18:13] ---**
Who said they'd lend you the bathroom?
**[18:14] ---**
Are you an absolute idiot?
I can piss right here if you want!
**[18:17] ---**
Let me in on this too!
**[18:19] ---**
Don't think you can run faster
than me in this house!
**[18:21] ---**
Outta my way!
Or you'll have a disaster!
**[18:23] ---**
Not bad, Ken Takakura!
**[18:25] ---**
This one is mine!
**[18:26] ---**
Not letting you!
**[18:31] ---**
This is humiliating.
**[18:33] ---**
Says you.
**[18:34] ---**
I had looked forward to experiences
unknown until now,
**[18:37] ---**
like getting abducted by aliens.
**[18:40] ---**
Seriously?
**[18:41] ---**
But this is just too much.
**[18:43] ---**
I want to hurry up
and be released from this curse.
**[18:46] ---**
Momo, you said that you were invincible
when your powers first awoke.
**[18:51] ---**
Yeah.
**[18:52] ---**
That's likely your original power.
**[18:55] ---**
And it seems for some reason,
that power has been sealed off.
**[18:58] ---**
What's with that? It sounds kinda cool.
**[19:00] ---**
It's a pain in the butt.
**[19:02] ---**
You have to unleash it
bit by bit through training,
**[19:06] ---**
and we don't know
how long that will take.
**[19:08] ---**
Though it's okay because it looks like
that boy's physical makeover will take some time.
**[19:12] ---**
I have to be watched while going
to the bathroom for a while?
**[19:15] ---**
That's my line...
**[19:19] ---**
Grandma, it's here! Turbo Granny!
**[19:21] ---**
Grandma?
**[19:22] ---**
Grandma?
**[19:24] ---**
Damn you! What the hell
are you doing to Grandma?
**[19:27] ---**
I'm letting her choose her cause of death.
A heart attack or a stroke.
**[19:33] ---**
My curse is contagious through this brat.
**[19:38] ---**
Any human this brat sees,
I can curse to death.
**[19:42] ---**
Don't underestimate me.
I'm not gonna give you any time.
**[19:48] ---**
Come to the tunnel tonight.
**[19:50] ---**
Otherwise, I'll use this brat to curse
everyone around there to death.
**[19:55] ---**
That's tonight.
**[19:57] ---**
Got that?
**[20:02] ---**
A nosebleed...
**[20:03] ---**
Grandma!
**[20:04] ---**
What's this?
**[20:06] ---**
You're bleeding from your ears, too!
**[20:07] ---**
Does your head hurt or something?
**[20:10] ---**
Momo. Let's hear about what just happened.
**[20:15] ---**
Am I seriously wearing this?
**[20:16] ---**
It's hard to see in front of me.
**[20:18] ---**
That's a bulletproof vest
against evil spirits.
**[20:21] ---**
Make sure to keep them on.
**[20:23] ---**
If you let your guard down,
you'll die quite easily.
**[20:25] ---**
I know that! Despite how we look,
we did defeat aliens!
**[20:29] ---**
There's no such thing as aliens.
Quit horsing around.
**[20:33] ---**
Oh, okay.
**[20:35] ---**
You bring all the trouble home in the first place
because you're like that.
**[20:40] ---**
You've never listened to me
ever since you were a little kid.
**[20:42] ---**
Man, so annoying!
The old hag's nagging is annoying.
**[20:46] ---**
Let's go, Okarun.
**[20:51] ---**
Momo!
**[20:52] ---**
What now? You're so naggy.
**[21:00] ---**
Don't die.
**[21:03] ---**
Yeah.
**[21:10] ---**
*I beg of you.*
**[21:12] ---**
*Please, protect those two.*
**[21:17] ---**
Why are we going by train?
**[21:19] ---**
It's too far by bicycle!
**[21:20] ---**
And you don't want to use up your stamina
before we get there!
**[21:23] ---**
You seriously aren't getting off
the hook, Turbo Granny!
**[21:26] ---**
- I'm sorry, this is all for...
- No way!
**[21:31] ---**
That hag tried to hurt something dear to me!
**[21:35] ---**
I'm gonna beat Turbo Granny into a pulp!
**[23:11] ---**
Hold on, Miss Ayase!
You shouldn't do that here!
**[23:14] ---**
I want to hurry up and take these off.
**[23:16] ---**
Is it okay to do that?
**[23:17] ---**
It's a battle uniform to protect yourself
from evil spirits, right?
**[23:21] ---**
Your grandmother said keep it on.
**[23:22] ---**
Who the hell would wear something like that?
**[23:26] ---**
Fashion is the battle uniform for *gyarus!*
**[23:29] ---**
I can't get hyped up unless I wear
the clothes I want to wear!
**[23:34] ---**
Why are you smiling?
**[23:36] ---**
Isn't this kinda fun?
**[23:37] ---**
Not at all. I feel like I'm about to puke.
**[23:42] ---**
Who's a gaudy old hag, ya scummy old hag!
**[23:44] ---**
What's got into you?
**[23:45] ---**
Turbo Granny called me
a gaudy old hag the other day!
**[23:47] ---**
Huh? That really happened?
**[23:48] ---**
You were kinda crazy
from that curse, Okarun!
**[23:50] ---**
All right, let's go!
**[23:52] ---**
Next episode,
"Kicking Turbo Granny's Ass."
***SIGN*** EPISODE 4 KICKING TURBO GRANNY'S ASS
**[23:54] ---**
But in the end,
it's a bit embarrassing to go by train.
# 4 - Kicking Turbo Granny's Ass
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** KEEP OUT
***SIGN*** EPISODE 4
KICKING TURBO GRANNY'S ASS
**[00:10] ---**
Okarun, you first.
**[00:12] ---**
I believe it's ladies first, actually.
**[00:14] ---**
But see, I'm so teary-eyed.
**[00:15] ---**
They're bone dry.
**[00:17] ---**
It's only fair to go side-by-side!
**[00:22] ---**
Hey! Okarun, you're behind me!
**[00:25] ---**
Argh, that's not fair, Miss Ayase!
Now you're behind me!
**[00:28] ---**
- Damn you!
- Wait! Hold on, stop it!
**[00:33] ---**
- Let's go.
- Okay.
**[00:34] ---**
So what were we going to do again
when Turbo Granny shows up? Punch her?
**[00:38] ---**
No! We're luring her outside of Shono City
to separate her from the location-bound spirit!
**[00:42] ---**
That way, she'll weaken,
and even we can defeat her.
**[00:46] ---**
That's right, that's right.
**[00:48] ---**
But we defeated that giant alien already,
so maybe we can defeat her, too?
**[00:53] ---**
You were scared just now.
**[00:56] ---**
I mean, she's a granny!
**[00:57] ---**
After experiencing something
that huge, a granny...
**[01:01] ---**
So huge!
**[01:03] ---**
Wh-What should we do, Miss Ayase!?
**[01:05] ---**
Calm down!
You just mentioned it just now!
**[01:07] ---**
We're leaving Shono City, right?
**[01:08] ---**
Let's go!
**[01:10] ---**
What!?
**[01:14] ---**
No way! Is this legit?
**[01:15] ---**
She's coming this way!
**[01:17] ---**
I'm borrowing this!
**[01:19] ---**
I should be able to do it. Go!
**[01:25] ---**
Her eyes are mouth! So gross!
**[01:28] ---**
Miss Ayase, please unleash the curse!
**[01:30] ---**
I'll make something out of this!
**[01:31] ---**
- Got it! Counting on you!
- Okay! I'll do my best!
**[01:37] ---**
Man, no good. I don't think I can do it.
**[01:40] ---**
I am utterly useless...
**[01:42] ---**
Oh, that's right,
you become a total downer.
**[01:45] ---**
I'll cheer for you, so go do your best!
Fight on!
**[01:48] ---**
I'll be crushed to death
from that pressure...
**[01:53] ---**
No way!
**[01:54] ---**
Miss Ayase? What's going on?
**[01:56] ---**
Why? I can't see it!
**[01:58] ---**
The power of the curse is gone?
**[02:00] ---**
I returned his weenie to him.
**[02:02] ---**
The curse is no longer.
**[02:04] ---**
What a surprise!
**[02:05] ---**
I didn't expect you to use
the power of the curse to transform!
**[02:10] ---**
But I won't let you do it.
**[02:12] ---**
You thieving pig!
I won't let you use my power!
**[02:17] ---**
I'm going to thoroughly chew
and eat you up!
**[02:22] ---**
*Taunt her.*
**[02:23] ---**
*That thing has absolute confidence
in its running.*
**[02:26] ---**
*A few random taunts
and it's sure to take the challenge.*
**[02:29] ---**
Are you that scared of losing
in a race?
**[02:32] ---**
Such brute force is so unfashionable.
**[02:35] ---**
I mean, your name is Turbo Granny, right?
**[02:37] ---**
There's no way you'd pass a race
to show off how fast you can run.
**[02:40] ---**
If you're really Turbo...
**[02:42] ---**
then challenge us with how fast you can run!
**[02:52] ---**
You...
**[02:54] ---**
Who do you think
you're mouthing off to, huh?
**[02:57] ---**
There's no way I'd lose in a running match.
**[03:00] ---**
Fine. I'll accept your challenge.
**[03:03] ---**
Besides, I can eat you two at any point.
**[03:06] ---**
What are the rules?
Where's the finish line?
**[03:09] ---**
No finish line. We're playing tag.
**[03:12] ---**
If you catch us, you win.
Simple, yeah?
**[03:15] ---**
Count for ten minutes when you begin.
**[03:17] ---**
We'll make a run for it
in the meantime.
**[03:19] ---**
Those are the rules, so you absolutely
have to adhere to them.
**[03:22] ---**
If you don't, the legend of Turbo Granny
will just be a piece of crap.
**[03:28] ---**
Very well.
**[03:29] ---**
I hate people who break the rules.
**[03:31] ---**
Then, let's begin! Run, Okarun!
**[03:35] ---**
One, two, three, four...
**[03:37] ---**
Amazing! I totally thought
we were goners!
**[03:40] ---**
Miss Ayase, are you a genius?
**[03:41] ---**
I know! But I shoulda provoked a bit harder!
**[03:42] ---**
One minute, three minutes,
five minutes...
**[03:44] ---**
Ten minutes might be cutting it close!
**[03:49] ---**
Eight minutes, six minutes...
**[03:50] ---**
Hold on! She's counting weird!
**[03:53] ---**
Ten minutes.
**[03:59] ---**
Okaru...
**[03:59] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[04:03] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[04:05] ---**
Her ten minutes have passed.
**[04:08] ---**
Now I have to count your ten minutes.
**[04:12] ---**
Forty...
**[04:14] ---**
One minute... Two minutes...
**[04:15] ---**
That's cheating!
Release Miss Ayase at once!
**[04:18] ---**
Fifty-six... Fifty-seven...
**[04:19] ---**
Stop! That way of counting is absurd!
**[04:21] ---**
You said you were going
to adhere to the rules!
**[04:23] ---**
She didn't specify how to count.
**[04:25] ---**
Four minutes... Five minutes...
**[04:28] ---**
Gimme a break! Stop counting!
**[04:30] ---**
Ten minutes.
**[04:32] ---**
There.
**[04:34] ---**
Caught you.
**[04:36] ---**
*But you're kinda dense, Okarun.
I'll probably be helping you next time, too!*
**[04:41] ---**
Let me suckle that teat!
**[04:47] ---**
Ouch!
**[04:49] ---**
How dare you suckle my teat
without permission!?
**[04:51] ---**
Let go, you bastard! Brat!
**[04:54] ---**
You're the one who said it!
**[04:56] ---**
I absolutely won't let go
until you release Miss Ayase!
**[04:59] ---**
Ouch!
**[05:00] ---**
What the hell's going on?
I can't muster my strength!
**[05:03] ---**
Is it because of this outfit!?
**[05:06] ---**
Damn you! I have no choice!
**[05:08] ---**
I'll possess you!
**[05:18] ---**
What a hassle!
**[05:20] ---**
Damn brat!
**[05:24] ---**
You aren't connected
to some sorcerer, are you?
**[05:29] ---**
Oh well. I'll eat the girl and end it all.
**[05:36] ---**
What is this feeling
of being crushed inside a hand?
**[05:39] ---**
I can tell. Even if I can't see,
I can tell really well.
**[05:43] ---**
Granny's main form slipped in,
so it's crystal clear...
**[05:47] ---**
by sense of touch!
**[05:52] ---**
Blast you!
**[05:56] ---**
Let go!
**[06:07] ---**
You saved me, Miss Ayase!
**[06:08] ---**
That's my line.
That was awesome, Okarun!
**[06:10] ---**
Damn it! Let me outta this brat!
**[06:14] ---**
I caught you, you scummy hag!
How should we torture you now...
**[06:19] ---**
Give her back.
**[06:21] ---**
Give Granny back!
**[06:25] ---**
Location-bound spirit, kill them!
**[08:09] ---**
Crab!
**[08:12] ---**
Why is the location-bound spirit a crab!?
**[08:14] ---**
Grandma said the dead turn themselves
into freshwater crabs to cross the River Styx!
***SIGN*** BEWARE OF BEARS
**[08:24] ---**
This way! Over here!
Where are you looking, you fool?
**[08:27] ---**
Okarun, time to transform!
**[08:28] ---**
Damn granny! You stay still, you punk!
**[08:31] ---**
- How dare you address me as such?
- Miss Ayase, hurry!
**[08:33] ---**
It's really hard! Unlike before,
you have the real thing in there!
**[08:39] ---**
Here it comes!
**[08:44] ---**
That was close! This is super serious!
**[08:46] ---**
Curse you! Don't use my power
without permission!
**[08:50] ---**
Let go, you punks!
**[08:51] ---**
This is great!
It's easier to squish you directly!
**[08:54] ---**
Momo-chan, it's lookin' bad.
**[08:56] ---**
Hey! Don't get chummy
and call me by my first name!
**[08:58] ---**
You're too heavy
so I can't make this curve.
**[09:01] ---**
For real!?
**[09:05] ---**
Damn it!
**[09:09] ---**
Time to go full throttle now!
**[09:13] ---**
Wicked! It's like a helicopter!
**[09:15] ---**
I can't do it anymore.
**[09:22] ---**
Ouch!
**[09:25] ---**
Okarun, are you okay?
**[09:26] ---**
I'm all droopy...
**[09:28] ---**
Sorry. Seriously, you're a lifesaver!
**[09:29] ---**
But I already used one full throttle.
**[09:31] ---**
That's right, you can only go
full throttle twice, right?
**[09:34] ---**
But I think we gained some distance, didn't we?
**[09:36] ---**
It's here!
**[09:42] ---**
There's a ton of faces on its back!
**[09:45] ---**
Crap! There's a lot of people here, too!
**[09:46] ---**
What's that?
He's totally giving a piggyback ride.
**[09:48] ---**
What dedication. So hilarious!
**[09:51] ---**
This is totally embarrassing!
**[09:53] ---**
No way! Nobody else can see the crab!?
**[09:55] ---**
Hold on a second!
**[09:56] ---**
That means we just look like
we're all in on a chicken fight!
**[10:00] ---**
I hope I don't bump into any friends!
**[10:02] ---**
Momo-chan, my stamina
is getting seriously low.
**[10:04] ---**
Come on, try harder!
What about your other full throttle?
**[10:06] ---**
No good even if I go full throttle.
I can't leave Shono City distance-wise!
**[10:09] ---**
At this rate, that thing
will catch up and eat us!
**[10:11] ---**
Seriously, anything but that!
**[10:12] ---**
I ain't letting no crab eat me!
I would rather eat a crab instead!
**[10:18] ---**
Let's try something. Hang a right, Okarun!
***SIGN*** HEALTH LAND
**[10:23] ---**
Welcome. How many will it be?
**[10:25] ---**
Two!
***SIGN*** MANGA CAFE A TIME TO RELAX
**[10:28] ---**
Head upstairs!
**[10:29] ---**
It should be harder for it
to chase us in a narrow place!
**[10:33] ---**
It doesn't matter at all!?
**[10:38] ---**
An explosion!
**[10:39] ---**
Run away!
**[10:42] ---**
Hot! What is this place?
**[10:45] ---**
This is not good, Miss Ayase!
**[10:46] ---**
Crabs thrive in waterfronts!
**[10:49] ---**
Water is water, but...
**[10:52] ---**
this is a hot spring!
**[11:01] ---**
When you boil crabs, the meat
tightens up and gets plump, right?
**[11:04] ---**
Tightening up means that
the muscle fibers stiffen up,
**[11:07] ---**
so maybe its movements will slow down.
**[11:18] ---**
It stopped. It stopped!
**[11:20] ---**
Boiled!
**[11:21] ---**
Now that it's all red,
it totally looks yummy!
**[11:24] ---**
Freaky! You were looking at it like that?
**[11:26] ---**
Stop eyeing it,
and let's just get out of here!
**[11:30] ---**
Straight down this road
and we'll escape Shono City.
**[11:33] ---**
Wait, aren't there fewer people than before?
**[11:35] ---**
Indeed.
**[11:41] ---**
What's that?
**[11:47] ---**
Crap, crap, crap, crap!
**[11:50] ---**
What are those guys!?
**[11:52] ---**
Idiots! You won't get away that easily!
**[11:55] ---**
There's a giant cemetery
at the edge of Shono City!
**[11:59] ---**
I just borrowed some help
from the spirits already resting there.
**[12:02] ---**
After all, Shono City is our territory!
**[12:13] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[12:16] ---**
We're not letting you leave Shono City!
**[12:28] ---**
Okarun, go full throttle.
**[12:30] ---**
Huh? Is it all right?
**[12:32] ---**
Even if I use it here,
we won't make it to the next city!
**[12:37] ---**
If you don't use it, we'll die right here!
**[12:39] ---**
Trust me!
**[12:45] ---**
Man, I'm so depressed.
**[12:47] ---**
You're done for.
**[12:49] ---**
One more full throttle from this kid
and he'll be immobile!
**[12:56] ---**
Do it!
**[13:25] ---**
Momo-chan, I can't make this turn!
**[13:44] ---**
Don't stop!
**[13:58] ---**
Momo-chan! We gotta get back
to the original route!
**[14:21] ---**
You untransformed!
**[14:23] ---**
Huh?
**[14:26] ---**
Don't suddenly let go of me!
**[14:40] ---**
Okarun, land!
**[14:58] ---**
I'm done for. I'm at my limit!
**[15:00] ---**
My body is going to rip apart!
**[15:02] ---**
Too wicked! I thought
I was gonna puke out my organs!
**[15:06] ---**
Okarun, stand up!
**[15:08] ---**
It's only a little further!
**[15:12] ---**
Turbo Granny.
**[15:14] ---**
Crap, I let go of her!
**[15:22] ---**
I can't forgive you for this.
You keep cheating.
**[15:25] ---**
What I detest the most...
**[15:28] ---**
is your lack of respect for elders.
**[15:31] ---**
You really are an amazing senior.
**[15:34] ---**
I've never seen an old person
who can bully young folks this much.
**[15:37] ---**
Mad respect for that.
**[15:39] ---**
Speak properly, you punk.
**[15:41] ---**
I can see through your ploys
to use modern words to fool the elderly.
**[15:46] ---**
I really hate those words. I hate it.
**[15:49] ---**
I hate shady brats like that.
**[15:52] ---**
What a...
**[15:59] ---**
son of a bitch.
**[16:01] ---**
All right, I'll eat ya, so run away.
**[16:04] ---**
You can leave Shono City real soon now.
**[16:08] ---**
I'll wait for you to finish running.
Ten minutes? Or 20 minutes?
**[16:15] ---**
Then I'll take one second.
**[16:19] ---**
My ability is to take anything...
**[16:24] ---**
and grab it.
**[16:32] ---**
Get back here!
**[16:35] ---**
Turbo Granny used to be called
Hundred Kilo Granny!
**[16:38] ---**
The Takasaki Line's maximum speed
is 120 kmph!
**[16:42] ---**
She can't catch up to us!
**[16:44] ---**
You're so slow! What a slowpoke!
**[16:46] ---**
You're nothing compared to us!
**[16:48] ---**
You're dead meat!
**[16:55] ---**
You fool!
**[16:57] ---**
Trains aren't always going at full speed!
**[17:01] ---**
They slow down at curves!
**[17:03] ---**
But I can always run at 100 kmph.
I'm not letting you get away!
**[17:08] ---**
"I'm not letting you get away,"
is my line, moron.
**[17:11] ---**
Just like Grandma said,
you always take the bait if I taunt ya.
**[17:15] ---**
You're already on board...
**[17:18] ---**
the rails of your defeat.
**[17:23] ---**
Yeah. Welcome to Kamigoe City.
**[17:27] ---**
You rotten bastard pigs!
**[17:30] ---**
Let go of me!
**[17:31] ---**
You were really fast, senior.
**[17:34] ---**
It's like you haven't lived
a long time for nothing.
**[17:36] ---**
Nobody can win against you.
**[17:39] ---**
But in this race...
**[17:42] ---**
I win.
**[18:11] ---**
Ow.
**[18:24] ---**
Miss Ayase, where are we!?
**[18:26] ---**
Where's the crab? And Turbo Granny?
**[18:29] ---**
Looks like we defeated them.
**[18:35] ---**
I really didn't want to be rough like this.
**[18:40] ---**
This is where girls around your age were violated,
cut to pieces, and tossed away.
**[18:46] ---**
They didn't become evil spirits
because they wanted to.
**[18:54] ---**
We spirit mediums
have long hunted Turbo Granny.
**[19:00] ---**
Granny always showed up in places
where spirits of girls met irrational deaths.
**[19:06] ---**
Perhaps she went around consoling the spirits
of the girls who couldn't rest in peace.
**[19:12] ---**
But the dead shouldn't assault the living.
That's no good.
**[19:16] ---**
We have to use force
to send them to the other side.
**[19:20] ---**
The same goes for the living.
They should never do anything to mock the dead.
**[19:25] ---**
Trample into their territory disrespectfully,
and you can only blame yourself for your death.
**[19:30] ---**
Those are the rules for the living
and the dead to coexist.
**[19:41] ---**
I'm glad you were okay.
**[19:46] ---**
Damn it, old hag!
Don't take all the big ones!
**[19:50] ---**
If you don't give me this piece of crab,
I'll break your Bakatono DVDs!
**[19:53] ---**
Try me! You do that and I'll burn
all your Ken Takakura merch!
**[19:57] ---**
You're taking Mr. Ken as hostage!?
You really aren't human!
**[19:59] ---**
You're the one
who took Bakatono hostage first!
**[20:02] ---**
- What'd you say, hag!?
- Huh?
**[20:02] ---**
Um, I don't have an appetite,
so if you'd like...
**[20:06] ---**
You have crab right in front of you
but no appetite? What a loser.
**[20:09] ---**
Monster.
**[20:10] ---**
I'd totally be eating
under normal circumstances!
**[20:12] ---**
How can you eat crab right after
experiencing what happened?
**[20:14] ---**
Then what do you want to eat
at what kind of time, you entitled brat?
**[20:19] ---**
I don't want to talk anymore!
**[20:21] ---**
You're so whiny for a guy.
Are you sure you have something down there?
**[20:25] ---**
I do! Thank you for retrieving it for me!
**[20:28] ---**
Show me.
**[20:29] ---**
Huh?
**[20:30] ---**
I'm telling you to show me
that it's actually there.
**[20:32] ---**
Um...
**[20:34] ---**
Are you stupid?
**[20:41] ---**
Are you insane!?
**[20:43] ---**
Miss Ayase, do something about this!
**[20:47] ---**
This family is insane!
**[20:50] ---**
Hold up, you!
**[20:55] ---**
Thank you for everything.
**[20:57] ---**
It's late so be careful.
**[20:59] ---**
I think it'll be safer than this house.
**[21:02] ---**
You're not getting away next time.
**[21:04] ---**
I'm never showing you.
**[21:06] ---**
So chilly.
**[21:10] ---**
Leave her be. She's not serious about it.
**[21:14] ---**
You weren't eating crab and were pretty depressed,
so I think she tried to cheer you up?
**[21:19] ---**
So that's it. I'm sorry I made her
be so considerate...
**[21:23] ---**
Not!
**[21:25] ---**
Well then, goodbye.
**[21:27] ---**
Yeah. Bye-bye.
**[21:32] ---**
*Goodbye?*
**[21:34] ---**
*Goodbye...*
**[21:36] ---**
*Goodbye?*
**[21:38] ---**
*Goodbye...*
**[21:40] ---**
Goodbye?
**[21:42] ---**
Goodbye...
**[21:45] ---**
Goodbye?
**[21:47] ---**
Goodbye...
**[21:49] ---**
Goodbye?
**[21:55] ---**
Okarun!
**[22:01] ---**
See you tomorrow!
**[22:09] ---**
Okay!
**[23:42] ---**
Grandma, why was it a crab?
**[23:44] ---**
They say spirits of the dead turn themselves
into freshwater crabs to cross the River Styx!
**[23:48] ---**
That's why they turned into location-bound
spirits inside that tunnel.
**[23:50] ---**
But yeah, I'm surprised
you really ate all that crab!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 5 LIKE, WHERE ARE YOU BALLS?
**[23:52] ---**
Next episode,
"Like, Where Are Your Balls!?"
**[23:54] ---**
That's why I told you to show me.
# 5 - Like, Where Are Your Balls?!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:14] ---**
*Calm down.*
**[00:16] ---**
*A morning hello is no big deal!*
**[00:18] ---**
Morning! Tee-hee!
Vamola! Ya doin' well?
**[00:19] ---**
*I practiced the heck out of it
last night! I got this!*
**[00:23] ---**
*I can't let her catch on
that I'm a morning hello amateur!*
**[00:45] ---**
*Hold on.*
**[00:46] ---**
*Even though we became friends,*
**[00:48] ---**
*would she suddenly start waiting for me
at the school gate?*
**[00:50] ---**
*She must be waiting for someone else!*
**[00:52] ---**
Morning!
**[00:59] ---**
*The correct answer is to ignore her.*
**[01:10] ---**
You're late. Let's go.
**[02:48] ---**
And that alien was saying
there were only men.
***SIGN*** EPISODE 5
LIKE, WHERE ARE YOU BALLS?
**[02:51] ---**
Oh, is that so?
**[02:53] ---**
They come here from super far away
on a UFO, right?
**[02:55] ---**
That UFO must've been totally musty!
**[02:59] ---**
I wonder what they normally eat.
What do you think?
**[03:03] ---**
Um, well, uh...
**[03:07] ---**
We'll chat again later.
**[03:09] ---**
Okay, see ya!
**[03:11] ---**
Yes, later...
**[03:15] ---**
See ya!
**[03:17] ---**
That hurt, damn you!
You're in the way, moron.
**[03:20] ---**
Can you hurry up and step aside?
You're so annoying!
**[03:43] ---**
*This is nothing.*
**[03:44] ---**
*No matter how brutal people may be,
I can forgive them all.*
**[03:49] ---**
*Because I know...*
**[03:52] ---**
*that I now have a wonderful friend!*
**[04:00] ---**
Over here!
**[04:02] ---**
Okay! Here goes!
**[04:02] ---**
*I shall forgive them.*
**[04:14] ---**
No good. Totes zoned out.
**[04:17] ---**
She's def acting weird!
**[04:18] ---**
I was wondering why she didn't return
my messages. She said she lost her phone.
**[04:22] ---**
And she wasn't at school yesterday.
**[04:24] ---**
Hey! Maybe she went to see
that ex-boyfriend?
**[04:27] ---**
Wow, for real?
**[04:28] ---**
And he rejected her flat-out so she stopped
caring about stuff and broke her phone?
**[04:33] ---**
That's so possible.
**[04:36] ---**
Here it comes! Agony time!
**[04:37] ---**
It's when she remembers the past
and writhes about.
***SIGN*** THE POWER TO LIVE!
**[04:46] ---**
*I wanna talk about aliens.*
***SIGN*** CRAB + TURBO G UMA? SPIRITUAL PHENOMENON? FRESHWATER CRAB?
**[04:51] ---**
*I want to talk to Miss Ayase!*
**[04:53] ---**
*I want to talk about ghosts!*
**[04:55] ---**
*I was at my wit's end in the morning,
and couldn't talk at all.*
**[04:58] ---**
*Miss Ayase asked me
all sorts of questions, too!*
**[05:02] ---**
*I want to talk to Okarun!*
**[05:03] ---**
*What do the aliens
that assaulted us usually eat?*
**[05:06] ---**
*And do they even wear underwear?*
**[05:09] ---**
*You idiot, Ken! You moron!*
**[05:12] ---**
*I want to talk to Okarun!*
**[05:14] ---**
*I must hurry and recover our relationship,
or she'll hate me!*
**[05:17] ---**
*I wanna talk, I wanna talk to him!*
***SIGN*** SPIRITUAL PHENOMENON ASSAULTING ALIENS ONLY HAVE MALES WHAT DO THEY USUALLY EAT?
**[05:56] ---**
Huh? Who?
**[05:57] ---**
Okarun! It's Okarun!
**[05:59] ---**
Tell us his name. Real name.
**[06:01] ---**
I can't possibly say his name!
**[06:03] ---**
Bring me the boy with glasses
who likes the occult!
**[06:05] ---**
Was anyone interested in the occult?
**[06:07] ---**
It's lunchtime,
so maybe he's at the cafeteria?
**[06:09] ---**
Um, excuse me.
**[06:11] ---**
Is Miss Ayase here?
**[06:13] ---**
Huh? Who? I can't hear you.
**[06:16] ---**
*Maybe she's at the cafeteria.*
**[06:18] ---**
Like Okarun would go
to such a rowdy place!
**[06:20] ---**
He's at the school store. The co-op!
**[06:21] ---**
*Co-op?*
**[06:23] ---**
*I'll drop by after I check the cafeteria.*
**[06:32] ---**
*She's not here. I should try the co-op.*
**[06:37] ---**
*I guess I'll try the cafeteria.*
**[06:47] ---**
*Nowhere to be found.*
**[06:53] ---**
*She's avoiding me.*
**[06:55] ---**
*She realized this morning how boring I am*
**[06:58] ---**
*and must've thought
that I'm a pain in the butt.*
**[07:00] ---**
Sheesh, where are you, Okarun?
**[07:03] ---**
Lunch break is gonna be over soon!
**[07:08] ---**
*This is the worst.*
**[07:11] ---**
*Come to think,
he was pretty lifeless this morning.*
**[07:14] ---**
*Maybe he doesn't like people
getting in his face?*
**[07:18] ---**
*Maybe I wasn't earnestly thinking
about Okarun's feelings.*
**[07:23] ---**
*Miss Ayase has so many friends, so I guess
I'm just a friend candidate.*
**[07:31] ---**
*Maybe he's avoiding me.*
**[07:35] ---**
*Maybe I don't even count as a friend.*
**[07:58] ---**
*I'm totes feelin' the blues.*
**[08:02] ---**
*I was conceited.*
**[08:04] ---**
*Why am I such a wimp?*
**[08:07] ---**
*Why am I always like this?*
**[08:09] ---**
*I'm sorry, Miss Ayase.*
**[08:11] ---**
*I'm sorry, Okarun.*
**[08:14] ---**
Ouch!
**[08:15] ---**
I found you, Okarun!
**[08:17] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[08:19] ---**
What are you doing there?
**[08:20] ---**
That's my line!
**[08:22] ---**
Ouch! Like, I heard teeth clashing!
**[08:24] ---**
I was searching for you
the whole time, Miss Ayase!
**[08:28] ---**
And that's my line!
Don't be wandering around so much!
**[08:32] ---**
Were you looking for me?
**[08:34] ---**
I was! And break is almost over!
**[08:37] ---**
I'd thought that you were completely
avoiding me, Miss Ayase.
**[08:40] ---**
That's what I was thinking!
**[08:45] ---**
*Huh? This is turning really awkward.*
**[08:48] ---**
*I have to change the topic fast!*
**[08:51] ---**
They were kissing just now!
**[08:53] ---**
Hold on, Momo.
You totes shoulda told us sooner!
**[08:56] ---**
So that's why
you've been acting so weird.
**[08:58] ---**
No way! I'd never kiss
a dimwit like him!
**[09:01] ---**
That's right! I'd never do that
with a stupid person like her!
**[09:04] ---**
Hold on just a second!
**[09:05] ---**
You don't got the right
to reject, you baldie!
**[09:07] ---**
I'm not bald!
Can you even see properly!?
**[09:10] ---**
How lame! A serious answer!
You're so lame, damn four-eyes!
**[09:13] ---**
Okay! You just antagonized every
single person wearing glasses in the world!
**[09:17] ---**
I don't want to talk to you, okay?
Don't talk to me!
**[09:20] ---**
You said it! You better not talk to me, okay?
**[09:28] ---**
Wicked.
**[09:30] ---**
Those two really get along!
**[09:34] ---**
*I couldn't help retort to her provoking.*
**[09:38] ---**
*There are so many things
I want to talk to her about.*
**[09:40] ---**
*I have to properly apologize.*
**[09:44] ---**
Huh?
**[09:47] ---**
No way.
**[09:49] ---**
Momo! I heard you were kissing
in the courtyard?
**[09:51] ---**
What kinda guy is he? Which class?
**[09:53] ---**
I said, it's nothing like that!
**[09:57] ---**
Actually, he's an otaku,
and a total four-eyes.
**[10:00] ---**
- Don't you run off with the story!
- Miss Ayase!
**[10:03] ---**
There he is! That's the bae!
**[10:05] ---**
I said...
**[10:07] ---**
he's not my...
**[10:09] ---**
Wait, what the hell are you doing?
**[10:10] ---**
Miss Ayase, I have to talk to you!
**[10:13] ---**
Oh, one of those.
**[10:14] ---**
That's unexpected.
**[10:15] ---**
Miss Ayase, there's a major issue!
**[10:18] ---**
Why are you here?
**[10:20] ---**
I said I didn't wanna talk to you!
**[10:21] ---**
Shoo! Shoo!
**[10:22] ---**
This isn't the time for all that!
**[10:24] ---**
It's something important!
**[10:26] ---**
I need to talk to you alone!
**[10:28] ---**
Please, listen to me!
**[10:30] ---**
As if!
**[10:31] ---**
We start off with a bloodbath?
I pity your bae!
**[10:34] ---**
As. I. Said.
He's not a boyfriend or anything!
**[10:37] ---**
Don't spread strange rumors!
**[10:39] ---**
Miss Ayase! You talked a whole bunch
to me this morning!
**[10:43] ---**
Why won't you talk to me at all now!?
**[10:45] ---**
You said you didn't want
to talk to me, too!
**[10:47] ---**
I was just provoked,
so it was just a retort.
**[10:51] ---**
To be honest, I just wanted to talk to you
more than anything, Miss Ayase!
**[10:55] ---**
Quite the words!
**[10:56] ---**
- Go for it, Otaku-kun!
- Shut up!
**[10:58] ---**
When I say I don't want to,
I don't want to! Go away!
**[11:01] ---**
Wow, how cold. That's so brutal.
**[11:04] ---**
You guys are the brutal ones!
**[11:11] ---**
So is it that embarrassing
to be friendly to me?
**[11:22] ---**
You don't have to go all-out
to reject him, you know?
**[11:25] ---**
If he's just a friend, you'd let it slide
with a wisecrack like you always do.
**[11:30] ---**
This isn't like you.
**[11:42] ---**
*I wonder if Miss Ayase
already went home.*
**[11:45] ---**
Oh, I'm sorry.
**[11:49] ---**
I'm sorry! Are you all right?
**[11:52] ---**
Huh? Oh, no, are you okay?
**[11:55] ---**
I have a water bottle in my bag.
I hope it didn't hurt?
**[12:00] ---**
Oh no, not at all.
Maybe it's because I've been working out?
**[12:04] ---**
I'm so sorry.
**[12:08] ---**
That was totally my fault!
**[12:10] ---**
P-Please don't worry about it.
**[12:13] ---**
You're a very kind person.
**[12:19] ---**
*Man, I feel so bummed.*
**[12:22] ---**
*It feels like I'm the bad guy.*
**[12:25] ---**
*No, I was the one at fault.*
**[12:34] ---**
*What the hell?*
**[12:35] ---**
*Didn't he say he had no friends?*
**[12:38] ---**
*And she's kinda cute, too.*
**[12:44] ---**
Hey, did you see that?
**[12:46] ---**
That otaku had such
a dumb look on his face.
**[12:50] ---**
He totally fell for me back there.
**[12:52] ---**
He must be head over heels
for me by now.
**[12:55] ---**
You're such a player.
**[12:56] ---**
What? I mean, it's so fun
when scum fall for you!
**[13:01] ---**
I'm sure a guy like that never had
a decent conversation with a girl, anyway.
**[13:04] ---**
And he probably will never
be touched by a cute girl like me ever again.
**[13:08] ---**
I'm letting him dream,
so isn't that a good thing?
**[13:12] ---**
I'm sure that four-eyed otaku
is happy now, too.
**[13:22] ---**
- Aira!
- You okay?
**[13:23] ---**
But wait, why a washtub?
**[13:25] ---**
That fell from directly above us,
didn't it?
**[13:28] ---**
Huh? That girl from earlier has fallen!
**[13:30] ---**
Did the impact of bumping into me
have a delayed effect?
**[13:37] ---**
M-Miss Ayase?
**[13:39] ---**
Okarun! Let's go home together!
**[13:42] ---**
Oh, you're really looking sharp
as usual with those glasses!
**[13:46] ---**
I guess stupid girls will never
understand your charm, Okarun.
**[13:50] ---**
Some are more fit to have washtubs
falling on their heads than guys falling for her.
**[14:10] ---**
I'm sorry, Okarun.
**[14:11] ---**
I had the worst attitude towards you.
**[14:15] ---**
In the courtyard, after that incident
that was like a kiss, I got all flustered.
**[14:23] ---**
I'm sorry I was so embarrassed.
**[14:26] ---**
I'm not embarrassed about
being friendly to you, Okarun.
**[14:30] ---**
No, it's fine! I don't mind at all.
**[14:34] ---**
More like, I'm very happy that
I could make amends with you.
**[14:46] ---**
A...
**[14:47] ---**
Anyway that's trivial.
I have a huge problem!
**[14:49] ---**
Huh? Wait, what do you mean trivial?
**[14:52] ---**
I was agonizing a lot about this!
**[14:54] ---**
Please calm down and listen.
**[14:56] ---**
You know how we defeated
Turbo Granny, right?
**[14:59] ---**
We did beat her.
**[15:00] ---**
We even visited a shrine afterwards.
**[15:01] ---**
Your curse is gone,
and your thing is back too, right?
**[15:05] ---**
It's gone.
**[15:07] ---**
What is?
**[15:08] ---**
Balls.
**[15:09] ---**
Huh?
**[15:09] ---**
My balls are gone.
**[15:13] ---**
That's why I told you to show me.
**[15:15] ---**
To begin with, why didn't you notice?
Those are your balls!
**[15:19] ---**
Miss Ayase, you're laughing too hard!
**[15:21] ---**
Well, the shaft was back, so I felt
reassured and didn't notice the balls.
**[15:27] ---**
Shaft? Stop making it sound
like it's something glorious!
**[15:29] ---**
Yours is nothing more than a pencil!
**[15:32] ---**
You've never seen it!
**[15:33] ---**
No choice. Gotta take a peek.
**[15:36] ---**
What? You're going to look?
**[15:37] ---**
I ain't gonna look at your wiener!
**[15:40] ---**
I'm gonna peek into your soul.
**[15:48] ---**
Momo! Bring me a doll, I don't care what!
**[15:50] ---**
Also, bring a washing bin and some water.
**[15:53] ---**
There's something hiding inside him.
**[16:01] ---**
All right, let's begin.
***SIGN*** PEACEFUL PROSPEROUS FAMILY WARD AGAINST EVIL AND MISFORTUNE
**[16:04] ---**
You put the talisman on the doll?
**[16:10] ---**
You...
**[16:11] ---**
dumb-dumb!
**[16:14] ---**
Huh? What is this? Huh!?
**[16:17] ---**
Don't move. Don't talk.
You rotten tangerine.
**[16:19] ---**
Wait a minute!
**[16:20] ---**
Are you completely
fooling around right now?
**[16:23] ---**
The lines in the kanji for "person"
support each other!
**[16:26] ---**
Okay! You are fooling around!
**[16:28] ---**
Besides, Kinpachi-sensei
would never say "rotten tangerine"!
**[16:31] ---**
Momo, did you get a glimpse of anything?
**[16:35] ---**
I did.
**[16:37] ---**
Right when Okarun got smacked,
the aura changed for an instant.
**[16:42] ---**
All right, Momo. Help me out.
**[16:44] ---**
The instant the aura changes colors,
pull out that aura.
**[16:47] ---**
You can pull out a human aura?
**[16:49] ---**
It won't be his.
**[16:51] ---**
If it's something foreign,
you should be able to pull it out.
**[16:53] ---**
Here goes.
**[16:55] ---**
Concentrate, okay?
**[16:57] ---**
Okay.
**[17:05] ---**
What?
**[17:06] ---**
I felt it just now!
**[17:08] ---**
Once I pulled it out, it disappeared!
**[17:09] ---**
Crap, Grandma! I might've let it escape!
**[17:13] ---**
Calm down.
**[17:25] ---**
Wait up, damn it!
**[17:27] ---**
It went that way! Come on, catch it!
**[17:34] ---**
So fast! Seriously, what is that thing?
**[17:36] ---**
Where did you go, rotten tangerine?
**[17:40] ---**
*I know!*
**[17:44] ---**
*Where is that cat?*
**[17:47] ---**
There you are!
**[17:54] ---**
Caught it!
**[17:58] ---**
It's probably here!
**[18:04] ---**
Let go of me, damn it!
**[18:07] ---**
I'll kill all three of ya!
**[18:11] ---**
That's amazing, Miss Ayase!
**[18:13] ---**
Your psychic powers have evolved!
**[18:16] ---**
Yeah! How's that?
**[18:18] ---**
- Come at me!
- So, who is this?
**[18:20] ---**
- Come on, come on!
- Dunno.
**[18:22] ---**
Well that's surprising.
**[18:24] ---**
What is this?
**[18:26] ---**
It's Turbo Granny.
**[18:28] ---**
But we defeated Turbo Granny!
She went to the afterlife, right?
**[18:32] ---**
Who'd be defeated
by some youngins like you?
**[18:35] ---**
Don't underestimate the elderly!
**[18:37] ---**
Doesn't she look kind of cute?
**[18:39] ---**
I just told you
to not underestimate me, punk!
**[18:42] ---**
In that instant I was getting burnt
by the barrier spell,
**[18:44] ---**
I switched to astral form
as if I was swimming in the flames,
**[18:47] ---**
and possessed the boy's body.
**[18:50] ---**
As I was close to being diminished, I was able
to completely sever my presence within his body.
**[18:55] ---**
I was hiding inside him as I waited
for my spiritual powers to recover.
**[18:59] ---**
I'd been thinking, when the time comes,
that I'll kill both of you.
**[19:04] ---**
You're still gonna go at it?
You've already lost.
**[19:06] ---**
I haven't lost!
There's no way I'd lose, idiot!
**[19:11] ---**
Especially you!
You're not getting away with this.
**[19:15] ---**
I'll snap all your bones!
**[19:20] ---**
Do you understand your current situation?
**[19:23] ---**
We're the ones with the advantage here.
**[19:25] ---**
You told us too much
about what's on your mind.
**[19:28] ---**
That's right! Hand the balls over!
Gimme my balls!
**[19:31] ---**
You have nowhere to run anymore!
**[19:35] ---**
You shouldn't be thinking
about defeating me.
**[19:39] ---**
If I die, your balls
will never go back to normal.
**[19:44] ---**
You morons finally understand
the situation now?
**[19:48] ---**
I'm the only one
with the advantage here, you bastards!
**[19:53] ---**
So for now, boy, bring a kitchen knife.
**[19:56] ---**
And kill these two bitches.
**[19:58] ---**
If you do, I'll give your balls back to you!
**[20:00] ---**
Damn you!
**[20:01] ---**
Do it!
**[20:03] ---**
You have no choice but to obey me!
**[20:06] ---**
Hurry up and do it!
**[20:21] ---**
Stuff like that is too much stress.
Makes me wilt.
**[20:25] ---**
Huh? Why? We drove Turbo Granny out,
so why can you transform?
**[20:30] ---**
Impossible! What's going on!?
**[20:32] ---**
This paper fan is used to drive evil spirits
outta people's bodies.
**[20:38] ---**
You seem to have been
trying really hard to cling on,
**[20:41] ---**
because it looks like only
Granny's consciousness came out.
**[20:45] ---**
Which means, your spiritual power
is still remaining inside the kid,
**[20:48] ---**
and just the consciousness
was transferred into the doll.
**[20:52] ---**
By the way, I'm the only one who can
return the consciousness to its original place.
**[20:57] ---**
But didn't you face Kinpachi here
and call me an idiot?
**[21:01] ---**
You dumb-dumb cat-turd rotten tangerine.
**[21:05] ---**
I'm sorry, Sensei!
**[21:06] ---**
I'm not your Sensei, you fool!
**[21:09] ---**
Oh, you really are cool Seiko-chan!
**[21:11] ---**
The hell you think you're doing?
**[21:14] ---**
You're back!
**[21:16] ---**
That was amazing!
How did you transform?
**[21:18] ---**
- Well, I don't know.
- Scurry, scurry.
**[21:20] ---**
I really got pissed and felt
I just couldn't forgive her, and I had transformed.
**[21:21] ---**
Get back here! Don't you be
running away, punk! You damn cat!
**[21:23] ---**
- Ouch!
- Take this!
**[21:26] ---**
You dumb-dumb! You rotten tangerine!
**[21:28] ---**
That's enough. Cut it out.
**[21:31] ---**
You're really petty, but to be honest,
I can't really hate you.
**[21:36] ---**
The feeling of sympathy for those girls
is the same, after all.
**[21:40] ---**
So let's be a bit friendly here.
**[21:43] ---**
If you give the balls back,
we'll return you your powers. Okay?
**[21:49] ---**
Okay?
**[21:51] ---**
Damn punks.
**[21:54] ---**
Fine.
**[21:55] ---**
All right, it's settled!
**[21:57] ---**
Now hurry up and give the balls back!
**[22:00] ---**
They're not here.
**[22:02] ---**
Hey! You promised.
**[22:05] ---**
- Hurry up and—
- I don't lie.
**[22:07] ---**
His balls?
I dropped them somewhere.
**[23:44] ---**
Oh, no.
**[23:44] ---**
Danger.
**[23:45] ---**
What's dangerous?
**[23:47] ---**
Humans are creatures that
just accidentally mutter "danger" sometimes.
**[23:50] ---**
I totally get that.
***SIGN*** EPISODE 6 A DANGEROUS WOMAN ARRIVES
**[23:52] ---**
Next episode,
"A Dangerous Woman Arrives."
**[23:53] ---**
And I'm asking you,
what's so dangerous?
# 6 - A Dangerous Woman Arrives
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:02] ---**
The balls are wrapped
in a veil of my spiritual energy.
**[00:07] ---**
The balls glimmer gold,
about five centimeters in diameter.
**[00:11] ---**
You'll recognize it the instant you see it.
**[00:14] ---**
Nope, it's not anywhere.
**[00:15] ---**
That's impossible!
We'll never find anything that small!
**[00:18] ---**
If you searched this hard and you can't find it,
then someone probably took them already.
**[00:23] ---**
Huh?
**[00:24] ---**
The balls are filled
with a powerful life force.
**[00:27] ---**
Spirits and yokai monsters
are drawn to stuff like that.
**[00:31] ---**
They believe they'll come back to life
if they gather enough items with high life force.
**[00:37] ---**
That's why evil spirits attack people,
and try to steal life force from them.
**[00:43] ---**
Isn't that bad news?
**[00:45] ---**
If someone takes them,
there's no way to look for them.
**[00:49] ---**
Like I care about that.
**[00:54] ---**
- You're the one who lost them!
- Ow! Stop it.
**[00:56] ---**
You look for it with us, damn it!
**[00:58] ---**
You goddamn turds!
**[01:00] ---**
Oh, wait, hold on, that hurts, wait...
**[01:04] ---**
This treatment... I'll never forget it.
**[01:08] ---**
We should go home for now
and think of a different strategy.
**[01:11] ---**
Right.
**[01:12] ---**
Find them?
**[01:13] ---**
Not at all.
**[01:16] ---**
If you have no leads,
there's nothing you can do.
**[01:20] ---**
I'll ask people I know
if they have ball intel, too.
**[01:24] ---**
*Ball intel?*
**[01:25] ---**
Also, don't forget that you still have
Turbo Granny's powers inside you.
**[01:31] ---**
Seems it's not going haywire this time,
but it's still a dangerous power.
**[01:36] ---**
Stay put until you figure something out.
**[01:38] ---**
Okay!
**[01:48] ---**
Hey.
**[01:49] ---**
Are you going out with Ayase?
**[01:51] ---**
Huh? Oh, no, I'm not dating her.
**[01:54] ---**
Huh? Is that right? I see.
**[01:57] ---**
Then can you introduce us?
**[02:01] ---**
Ayase is super cute!
**[02:03] ---**
I've been wanting
to get to know her for a while now!
**[02:05] ---**
*Miss Ayase is...*
**[02:07] ---**
*cute!?*
**[02:09] ---**
*I never even considered that.*
**[02:11] ---**
*I was just happy
that I made my first friend.*
**[02:14] ---**
*But wait, if I think about it,
she might be cute.*
**[02:19] ---**
*No, wait!*
**[02:20] ---**
*Miss Ayase is my friend!*
**[02:21] ---**
*Thinking she's cute is bad!
That's impure!*
**[02:24] ---**
So you guys have, like, done it, right?
**[02:26] ---**
Huh?
**[02:27] ---**
Rumors say she'll sleep with anyone.
**[02:30] ---**
Huh? Who'd say such a thing?
**[02:32] ---**
Dunno. But it's true, right?
**[02:34] ---**
Come on, please...
**[02:36] ---**
Who is spreading those rumors?
**[02:40] ---**
Huh? What's going on here?
**[02:43] ---**
You wanna fight?
**[02:45] ---**
I asked you who was spreading
such rumors.
**[02:50] ---**
Ya see, Momo-chan...
**[02:53] ---**
ain't that kind of girl.
**[02:56] ---**
It's best not to spread rumors like that.
**[02:59] ---**
It's not me! I get it!
**[03:02] ---**
I get it, so let go of me!
**[03:05] ---**
Hey, what's up? You okay?
**[03:07] ---**
- I'm sorry.
- Hey.
**[03:25] ---**
*Calm down! Calm down!*
**[03:27] ---**
Yo.
**[03:30] ---**
Looks like you're havin' a hard time.
**[03:43] ---**
I haven't been to a school in centuries.
It's gotten so nice.
**[03:47] ---**
What're you doing here of all places?
**[03:49] ---**
In the first place, aren't you quarantined
in Miss Ayase's house?
**[03:53] ---**
Seiko said, "Cat, you can roam free.
You can't do anything anyway."
**[03:59] ---**
*I can see her saying that.*
**[04:01] ---**
Anyway, aren't you in trouble?
**[04:03] ---**
That power is way too heavy
of a burden for you.
**[04:07] ---**
You should let me inside
your body once more.
**[04:11] ---**
Don't worry.
**[04:13] ---**
I'll leave as soon as
I regain my power.
**[04:17] ---**
It's a really simple process.
**[04:20] ---**
Give me a break!
**[04:21] ---**
You returning my balls
to me comes first!
**[04:23] ---**
I won't fall for slick talk like that!
**[04:25] ---**
Okarun!
**[04:29] ---**
Whatcha up to?
**[04:31] ---**
Miss Ayase! Actually, right now...
**[04:33] ---**
- Inside this is Tur—
- Shh! Quiet!
**[04:40] ---**
...bo Gra...
**[04:43] ---**
*Ayase is super cute!*
**[04:46] ---**
C-Cute...
**[04:51] ---**
What the hell?
**[04:51] ---**
Why are you shying away from me?
**[04:53] ---**
Um, well, it's not what you think.
**[04:56] ---**
Then look at me!
**[04:57] ---**
Um, hold on.
**[04:59] ---**
And like, stop!
**[05:00] ---**
Why are you running from me?
**[05:03] ---**
Wait, damn you!
**[05:05] ---**
It's not what you think!
**[05:07] ---**
- I'll kill your punk ass!
- Why!?
**[05:10] ---**
Guess I'll enjoy campus life
for the first time in a while.
**[05:14] ---**
Oof.
**[05:16] ---**
Momo, why you so mad?
**[05:18] ---**
What? Something happen with your bae?
**[05:21] ---**
For some reason he's totally avoiding me.
**[05:23] ---**
I'm seriously pissed.
And he ain't my boyfriend, either.
**[05:26] ---**
But he's a good guy.
**[05:27] ---**
Huh? That came from nowhere.
Whatcha talkin' about?
**[05:30] ---**
I heard from someone in Class C.
**[05:33] ---**
Okarun got in a fight with boys
who were badmouthing you.
**[05:37] ---**
What?
**[05:38] ---**
Seems someone is spreading
nasty rumors about you.
**[05:44] ---**
And I heard he got pissed about that.
**[05:47] ---**
Then why is he avoiding me?
**[05:51] ---**
*I am just too pretty.*
**[05:55] ---**
*Everyone's eyes are glued to me
when I'm just walking down the hall.*
**[06:00] ---**
*And I'm not just cute.*
**[06:02] ---**
*I even greet the local blockheads
with a smile.*
**[06:06] ---**
*By believing that a pretty girl likes them,
they can live another day.*
**[06:11] ---**
*I am a pretty girl who is also kind.*
**[06:14] ---**
*But someone as perfect as myself
has things to get super upset about.*
**[06:19] ---**
*I wanted to get back at that bitch,
so I spread rumors that she's a slut.*
**[06:24] ---**
*But the rumor isn't spreading much.
So maddening!*
**[06:27] ---**
*They just don't get it at all.*
**[06:30] ---**
*She's a demon.*
**[06:34] ---**
*I saw it clearly back then.*
**[06:39] ---**
*She had demon wings on her back!*
**[06:43] ---**
*Momo Ayase.
She's definitely a demon!*
**[06:49] ---**
*But since I suddenly became
able to see things like that,*
**[06:53] ---**
*then I must be a chosen individual!*
**[06:57] ---**
*I had hunches that I was.*
**[06:59] ---**
*I mean, I'm all too pretty!*
**[07:02] ---**
*As proof, this fell down from the sky.*
**[07:07] ---**
*A golden ball!*
**[07:09] ---**
*This is telling me to save this world
from evil demons!*
**[07:17] ---**
*I get it! I'll do it!*
**[07:20] ---**
*I mean, after all, I am a pretty girl!*
**[09:00] ---**
Ouch!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 6 A DANGEROUS WOMAN ARRIVES
**[09:02] ---**
Ow! So annoying!
**[09:04] ---**
What is this?
**[09:06] ---**
A marble?
**[09:18] ---**
Huh?
**[09:55] ---**
Aira!
**[09:58] ---**
I brought that thing you wanted.
**[10:00] ---**
I only borrowed it, so be careful.
**[10:01] ---**
I finally have all the equipment I need.
***SIGN*** HOLY BLESSINGS AND BANISHMENT PRAYERS
**[10:12] ---**
Doesn't this smell oily?
Is this cross genuine?
**[10:15] ---**
How should I know?
**[10:17] ---**
Hey, are you really doing this?
**[10:19] ---**
Of course I am!
**[10:20] ---**
I have been chosen
because I'm just too beautiful.
**[10:25] ---**
I must save the world!
**[10:29] ---**
I'll believe you because I'm your friend,
but Aira, you've been weird lately.
**[10:33] ---**
What you're trying to do now
is kinda strange, too.
**[10:37] ---**
Hold on a second! What is that!?
**[10:41] ---**
There's a woman in a red dress!
**[10:48] ---**
Sorry. We don't see it at all.
**[10:50] ---**
It can't be! That must be her familiar!
**[10:53] ---**
Momo Ayase is trying to spy on us!
**[10:56] ---**
Both of you, get low!
Her familiar will find us!
**[11:00] ---**
Shiratori, what are you doing?
**[11:03] ---**
It's a bit hot today,
so I was feeling how cold the wall is.
**[11:07] ---**
Shiratori, you're such a ditz.
**[11:09] ---**
Hey, I am not!
But people often say that I am.
**[11:14] ---**
*So pesky.*
***SIGN*** WE'RE GONNA DO IT AFTER SCHOOL. YOU CAN'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT IT!
**[11:21] ---**
You really are a ditz.
**[11:22] ---**
- Oh no, you're getting Aira in trouble!
- Right? Yeah, no doubt.
**[11:31] ---**
Hey.
**[11:33] ---**
Yes?
**[11:34] ---**
I'm telling you to look at me!
**[11:36] ---**
I'm watching over Turbo Granny
so she doesn't run off somewhere!
**[11:39] ---**
You won't be able to stop me.
**[11:41] ---**
Wait, why is Granny at school!?
**[11:44] ---**
Huh? Why do I have to take orders
from ya?
**[11:48] ---**
Cuz you lost against me.
**[11:50] ---**
Bring it on, punk! I'll take you on!
**[11:52] ---**
- Yeah! Come at me!
- I'll get you!
**[11:54] ---**
Anyway, Turbo Granny said
she found a strange woman.
**[11:59] ---**
Why don't we talk about that?
**[12:01] ---**
That's right. Don't think I was just
simply strolling around the school.
**[12:06] ---**
I was looking for them golden balls, too.
**[12:08] ---**
Huh? Why would the golden balls
be at school, idiot?
**[12:13] ---**
All right, you're dead meat.
Goodbye to you!
**[12:15] ---**
It's worth a search, I think.
**[12:17] ---**
I didn't think about it, but there's a possibility
that a human, and not a yokai, picked them up.
**[12:22] ---**
It looks like a pretty ball made of gold.
**[12:26] ---**
It wouldn't be a surprise
if anyone picked it up.
**[12:29] ---**
However, if a human picked it up,
it might awaken their spiritual powers
**[12:34] ---**
and depending on the person,
allow them to see spirits.
**[12:37] ---**
The fact they can see spirits means
the spirits can see them, too.
**[12:41] ---**
There's the danger
that they might get attacked.
**[12:44] ---**
That's terrible.
You should've said so earlier!
**[12:47] ---**
Who is this strange woman?
**[12:49] ---**
I don't know her name.
**[12:52] ---**
I'll go introduce her to you after school.
**[12:57] ---**
*Momo Ayase!*
**[12:58] ---**
*Just how much power does she have?*
**[13:02] ---**
*Can I defeat her with just the cross
and the holy book they got for me?*
**[13:07] ---**
*Besides, she has a familiar.*
**[13:10] ---**
*Can I take both of them on at once?*
**[13:14] ---**
*She's getting closer!*
**[13:16] ---**
*The woman in the red dress!*
**[13:22] ---**
Okarun!
**[13:24] ---**
All right, time to go look!
**[13:26] ---**
Where's Granny?
**[13:27] ---**
She's in my backpack.
**[13:30] ---**
Miss Momo Ayase.
**[13:34] ---**
I need to talk to you. Alone.
**[13:40] ---**
Huh? What? I'm busy right now.
**[13:44] ---**
It'll be over quickly, so please.
**[13:47] ---**
*This girl is the one
who I dropped the washtub onto.*
**[13:49] ---**
*Has she caught onto something?*
**[13:51] ---**
*It might get annoying later,
so I guess I'll go.*
**[13:54] ---**
Okarun, go ahead and start looking.
**[13:57] ---**
I'll join you later!
**[13:58] ---**
What?
**[14:00] ---**
Okay.
**[14:02] ---**
*Oh, brother. I'm not sure
if I can look for it alone.*
**[14:06] ---**
It's her.
**[14:07] ---**
Huh?
**[14:15] ---**
You brought me all the way here.
What'd you wanna talk about?
**[14:28] ---**
Die, demon!
**[14:30] ---**
It stinks! It smells oily! What is it?
**[14:33] ---**
O demon, return to the world
you belong in!
**[14:37] ---**
Hold her legs!
Make sure she doesn't move!
**[14:41] ---**
You idiots!
**[14:50] ---**
There they are! The demon wings!
**[14:52] ---**
The cross isn't working!
**[14:54] ---**
If that's the case...
**[14:57] ---**
If I use the golden ball
I received from the heavens...
**[15:03] ---**
That's...
**[15:04] ---**
So you picked up the ball?
**[15:07] ---**
You know about this ball?
**[15:09] ---**
I won't give this ball to you!
**[15:11] ---**
This is a sacred ball
that I was given to save the world with!
**[15:15] ---**
No way! That's Okarun's family jewels!
Give it back, moron!
**[15:19] ---**
You're the worst!
**[15:20] ---**
How dare you say that
to the sacred ball! How vulgar!
**[15:24] ---**
Damn you!
**[15:25] ---**
Ouch! Are you
a complete idiot?
**[15:26] ---**
Don't revere someone else's
nutsack so much!
**[15:29] ---**
Miss Ayase! I found it!
**[15:31] ---**
Okarun! You're a serious lifesaver!
**[15:33] ---**
She's got your ball!
She's the strange woman!
**[15:37] ---**
He's on her side?
**[15:38] ---**
That's not true!
She's not the strange woman!
**[15:41] ---**
She's the one who's being targeted
by the strange woman.
**[15:47] ---**
I finally have you now, Aira.
**[15:53] ---**
I've been waiting all this time
until you became able to see me.
**[16:03] ---**
*Mommy!*
**[16:07] ---**
Here's Mommy!
**[16:10] ---**
The familiar!
**[16:14] ---**
Okarun! Do it!
**[16:16] ---**
Okay!
**[16:23] ---**
What a surprise!
**[16:26] ---**
Are you after my little Aira?
**[16:29] ---**
You were a demon, too?
**[16:32] ---**
Man, I hate this...
**[16:33] ---**
I wanna go home.
**[16:36] ---**
I feel so withered...
**[16:40] ---**
I won't let you have Aira!
**[16:46] ---**
Okarun!
**[16:47] ---**
Don't you just be eating him!
**[16:50] ---**
Come on!
**[16:54] ---**
Damn it!
**[16:55] ---**
My hands are tied
so I can't control it the way I want!
**[17:06] ---**
We finally meet, Aira.
**[17:10] ---**
I waited for over ten years
for you to look at me, Aira.
**[17:15] ---**
Hey, you! You're not
Momo Ayase's familiar?
**[17:19] ---**
Don't "Hey you" me, moron!
**[17:21] ---**
I am your Mommy!
**[17:22] ---**
Just how much do you think
that I've loved you?
**[17:26] ---**
You called me Mommy back then!
**[17:30] ---**
I was so happy about that.
**[17:32] ---**
It was the first time
you said anything like that.
**[17:35] ---**
Please call me that one more time.
**[17:40] ---**
Now, call me Mommy!
**[17:43] ---**
Hey, damn old hag.
**[17:44] ---**
Give Okarun back.
**[17:48] ---**
I thought assaulting humans
was against the rules!
**[17:52] ---**
Each and every one of you...
**[17:54] ---**
I am in the middle
of an emotional reunion here.
**[17:57] ---**
Hold it, Momo Ayase!
What in the world is this thing?
**[18:00] ---**
Is it possible that you're enemies
with this demon?
**[18:03] ---**
If so, why don't we cooperate
and defeat this demon together?
**[18:06] ---**
What the hell are you talking about?
**[18:08] ---**
Whew, that was close.
**[18:12] ---**
I was about to be that thing's side dish.
**[18:14] ---**
Turbo Granny!
**[18:18] ---**
That's Acrobatic Silky.
**[18:21] ---**
Wait, that's Muko's phone!
**[18:24] ---**
You pilfered it to do internet searches?
**[18:26] ---**
Let's see. A red dress, acrobatic movements,
and silky hair.
**[18:31] ---**
You're a yokai yourself,
but you don't know anything about her?
**[18:34] ---**
I don't care about rookie nobodies.
**[18:38] ---**
I am a chosen one!
Because I'm too pretty!
**[18:42] ---**
I defeat monsters like you!
**[18:45] ---**
Aira-chan, what did you just say?
**[18:48] ---**
I'm going to defeat monsters like you,
and uphold world peace!
**[18:55] ---**
Knock it off! Why are you
chomping 'em all down?
**[19:00] ---**
It's all your fault!
**[19:01] ---**
You tempted Aira
into becoming a delinquent!
**[19:05] ---**
She called me a monster!
**[19:07] ---**
She would never have said that before!
**[19:11] ---**
Granny, hurry up and get this zip tie off!
**[19:13] ---**
Oh, that's impossible.
**[19:14] ---**
Come on, cooperate a little bit!
**[19:16] ---**
She just ate Okarun!
**[19:18] ---**
This'll be bad for me to face alone!
**[19:20] ---**
You guys were the ones
who took my power from me.
**[19:23] ---**
I can't do anything for ya.
**[19:26] ---**
No way!
**[19:32] ---**
First, how about you apologize!
**[19:34] ---**
It's all your fault, after all!
**[19:37] ---**
Now, say it!
**[19:40] ---**
Piece of crap.
**[19:42] ---**
Girgle.
**[19:47] ---**
My acrobatics are like a violent storm!
**[19:51] ---**
Ensnaring anything and everything,
then swing them away!
**[19:59] ---**
Here!
**[20:01] ---**
Oh, you're such a hopeless child.
**[20:05] ---**
This is Aira's special privilege, but if you want
to say it that badly, you may.
**[20:10] ---**
Try saying "Mommy" right now.
I'll forgive you if you do.
**[20:15] ---**
Come on!
**[20:18] ---**
I can't hear you.
**[20:20] ---**
You have to say it properly.
Ready? "M-O-M-M-Y."
**[20:27] ---**
I told you to say it, damn brat!
**[20:29] ---**
Say, "Mommy"!
**[20:30] ---**
You...
**[20:31] ---**
Piece of crap.
**[20:43] ---**
Where is my baby?
**[20:47] ---**
Come on now, you got gobbled up.
**[20:50] ---**
Hey, nobody.
**[20:52] ---**
I'm still willing to forgive you,
so return the brats you swallowed.
**[20:56] ---**
What are you?
Can you not speak to me right now?
**[21:01] ---**
Why don't you speak politely, punk!
I am your elder by far.
**[21:05] ---**
Sounds like you've got a death wish.
**[21:08] ---**
A beckoning cat supposedly has the ability
to beckon over some good fortune.
**[21:14] ---**
You ate some hair when you ate Momo.
**[21:18] ---**
So hot!
**[21:20] ---**
What is this!? My hair is burning!
**[21:22] ---**
It's burning inside my body, too!
**[21:24] ---**
What did you do to me,
you foul feline?
**[21:27] ---**
That cross that the girl
was holding was a lighter.
**[21:33] ---**
Momo took that lighter
and lit your hair on fire.
**[21:37] ---**
There's nothing combustible
inside your body.
**[21:40] ---**
But you coincidentally ate your own hair.
**[21:44] ---**
Such fortuity becomes inevitability
because I'm here.
**[21:58] ---**
So hot!
**[21:59] ---**
Miss Ayase, that's being too reckless!
**[22:01] ---**
Huh? Okarun, you were the first to be eaten!
Don't preach to me!
**[22:05] ---**
Rescue successful!
**[22:07] ---**
Time for the counterattack, damn it!
**[23:44] ---**
I will uphold peace in this world!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 7 TO A KINDER WORLD
**[23:52] ---**
Next episode, "To a Kinder World"
# 7 - To a Kinder World
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:33] ---**
You took Aira from me!
**[00:38] ---**
My little Aira!
**[00:48] ---**
Give her back!
You filthy pigs!
**[00:55] ---**
Aira-chan is getting in our way.
What a downer.
**[00:58] ---**
What should we do, Momo-chan?
**[00:59] ---**
Just keep running away!
**[01:05] ---**
This place is full of obstacles.
I can't run fast.
**[01:08] ---**
It's fine! I have an idea!
**[01:10] ---**
You're not getting away!
**[01:12] ---**
You delinquent girl!
**[01:16] ---**
Momo-chan!
**[01:21] ---**
Give Aira back!
**[01:23] ---**
You dimwit wiener boy!
**[01:26] ---**
Makes me wilt.
**[01:43] ---**
In this tricky terrain...
**[01:50] ---**
you're trying to escape my acrobatics?
**[01:54] ---**
Of course you can't!
**[01:58] ---**
It's fine, Aira.
**[02:00] ---**
If you don't want to say
"Mommy" that much,
**[02:03] ---**
I'm okay with that.
**[02:07] ---**
I just want to be together with you.
**[02:11] ---**
By devouring you,
you'll become my flesh and blood.
**[02:14] ---**
Then that way, I can be with you forever!
**[02:18] ---**
So let me properly...
**[02:21] ---**
masticate you.
**[02:25] ---**
What is this? What is going on?
**[02:28] ---**
Why can't I move forward?
**[02:31] ---**
Your acrobatics ensnare
anything and everything, right?
**[02:35] ---**
With that singed granny perm you've got,
**[02:38] ---**
it looks like you can't let go
of the things you ensnare.
**[02:44] ---**
Nice, Okarun!
**[02:45] ---**
You ran away really well!
**[02:47] ---**
Damn pigs!
**[02:49] ---**
Don't you think
you've caught me with this trick!
**[02:59] ---**
Miss Ayase! She's trying to break
the beams to free herself!
**[03:03] ---**
Like I'd let you!
**[03:07] ---**
Don't you dare touch my beautiful legs,
you punk delinquent girl!
**[03:12] ---**
Okarun, go at full throttle!
**[03:14] ---**
You haven't done it yet, right?
**[03:15] ---**
Go full throttle and blow her away!
**[03:21] ---**
Blow her away? How do I do that?
**[03:24] ---**
Huh?
**[03:25] ---**
When we fought the alien,
I was flustered and a bit desperate.
**[03:28] ---**
And with the location-bound spirit,
I was devoting myself to fleeing!
**[03:31] ---**
I have never properly
blown a person away!
**[03:34] ---**
Why are you telling me now
after all this? Just kick her away!
**[03:37] ---**
Kick her away, like in soccer?
**[03:39] ---**
Like I'd know!
I don't care what, just do it quick!
**[03:47] ---**
Not good! Hurry, Okarun!
**[03:49] ---**
I can't hold her back anymore!
**[03:50] ---**
You little punks...
**[03:53] ---**
I'll kill you!
**[03:58] ---**
Okarun, send her flying!
**[04:18] ---**
Wicked.
**[04:20] ---**
The hell?
**[04:21] ---**
Full throttle is amazing! Okarun, you get
things done when you try!
**[04:24] ---**
That hurt!
**[04:26] ---**
My entire body will explode!
**[04:30] ---**
You used my power but this
was all your attack could do?
**[04:37] ---**
This is tough.
**[04:38] ---**
You son of a bitch!
**[04:40] ---**
What should we do with her?
**[04:41] ---**
Should we have Grandma exorcise her?
**[04:43] ---**
Leave that nobody alone.
It just ate one of my attacks.
**[04:47] ---**
She won't be able to use
her spiritual power for a while.
**[04:50] ---**
Anyway, the golden ball.
That girl has it, right?
**[04:53] ---**
Oh, that's right!
**[04:54] ---**
Let's take it while we can.
**[04:59] ---**
More like, I really want these zip ties
off my wrists.
**[05:02] ---**
Okarun, got a pair of scissors?
**[05:05] ---**
I'm sorry, I don't have one.
**[05:07] ---**
I've been tied up this whole time
because of this stupid girl.
**[05:11] ---**
How is she related
to that Acro-Silky, anyway?
**[05:13] ---**
Hey, Momo.
**[05:15] ---**
Found the golden ball?
**[05:17] ---**
Found it.
**[05:18] ---**
Whoa!
**[05:19] ---**
Good for you, Okarun!
**[05:20] ---**
We found one of your family jewels!
**[05:22] ---**
How you say it is so embarrassing.
**[05:23] ---**
But more importantly...
**[05:26] ---**
What's wrong?
**[05:29] ---**
This girl's dead.
**[07:04] ---**
Dead?
***SIGN*** EPISODE 7 TO A KINDER WORLD
**[07:05] ---**
No way!
**[07:06] ---**
Okarun, check her pulse!
**[07:07] ---**
O-Okay!
**[07:16] ---**
It can't be...
**[07:17] ---**
An ordinary human
eaten by a yokai will die.
**[07:22] ---**
It's nothing to be surprised about.
**[07:24] ---**
It just happened
that someone with psychic powers
**[07:26] ---**
and someone with my spiritual powers
were spared.
**[07:29] ---**
That's all it is.
**[07:31] ---**
Okarun, can you do CPR?
**[07:32] ---**
Huh? I'm not too confident.
**[07:34] ---**
I'll try cardiac massage!
**[07:36] ---**
If I use psychic powers,
I can directly massage her heart!
**[07:46] ---**
If she's dead, the heart
is nothing more than a chunk of flesh.
**[07:46] ---**
One, two, three, four, five...
**[07:50] ---**
There's no use in massaging it.
**[07:51] ---**
Shut up!
**[07:52] ---**
If you're gonna get in our way,
get outta here!
**[07:54] ---**
Okarun, breathe!
**[07:55] ---**
H-Here goes!
**[07:58] ---**
Granny, call an ambulance!
You have Muko's phone, don't you?
**[08:01] ---**
Such futility.
**[08:07] ---**
Once more!
**[08:08] ---**
One, two, three, four, five... Okarun!
**[08:14] ---**
One, two, three, four, five...
**[08:18] ---**
Aira...
**[08:20] ---**
My little Aira...
**[08:23] ---**
Damn you!
We don't have time for that!
**[08:25] ---**
I'll take care of her! Miss Ayase,
continue with the resuscitation!
**[08:29] ---**
Doing that will not bring Aira back to life.
**[08:32] ---**
There's a better way.
**[08:35] ---**
Give my aura to Aira.
**[08:37] ---**
Aura is like a battery for organisms.
**[08:41] ---**
Motors don't move without batteries, yes?
**[08:45] ---**
Aira's aura is almost gone.
You can augment it with my own.
**[08:49] ---**
Who the hell is gonna believe what you say!?
**[08:52] ---**
You're just thinking about
eating her again, aren't you!?
**[09:00] ---**
And now, I can't eat people anymore.
**[09:02] ---**
If you still can't trust me, then you can
crush my head with this steel beam.
**[09:09] ---**
What she's saying is true.
**[09:13] ---**
Without an aura,
that girl will stay that way.
**[09:22] ---**
I don't trust you!
**[09:24] ---**
So if you make any funny movements,
I'll instantly crush your head in!
**[09:28] ---**
Okarun, you can go full throttle
one more time, right?
**[09:32] ---**
Keep her targeted.
**[09:35] ---**
You said your were going to augment
this stupid girl's aura with your own.
**[09:40] ---**
How do you do that? Tell me.
**[09:43] ---**
Use your psychic power to connect my aura
to Aira's dimming aura.
**[09:50] ---**
You could say it's like
a communication cable.
**[09:57] ---**
Okarun, make sure to keep
your eyes on her.
**[09:59] ---**
What a bother.
**[10:01] ---**
Here goes!
**[10:41] ---**
Let's go to karaoke, like, seriously.
**[10:43] ---**
What? Like, we're totally not going.
**[11:45] ---**
I'm home.
**[14:25] ---**
Don't underestimate us, damn it.
**[14:33] ---**
You bitch!
**[14:38] ---**
Damn it, what the hell!?
**[16:50] ---**
Mommy, thank you for all you do.
**[16:59] ---**
*I can't remember.*
**[17:03] ---**
*I think I lost something dear to me.*
**[17:11] ---**
Mommy.
**[17:20] ---**
Huh?
**[17:21] ---**
You're not her...
**[17:22] ---**
Aira!
**[17:31] ---**
I told you not to go running off
on your own.
**[17:34] ---**
I thought Mommy was there.
**[17:37] ---**
There's no way she's around here.
**[17:41] ---**
Daddy, where did Mommy go?
**[17:44] ---**
I told you many times already.
**[17:46] ---**
She's gone to a place very far away.
**[17:49] ---**
When will she be back?
**[17:51] ---**
She won't be coming back for a while.
**[17:55] ---**
That's why, Aira, you have to be stronger.
**[17:58] ---**
So that you can do everything on your own
even without Mommy.
**[18:02] ---**
So that one day, when Mommy comes back,
she can be proud of what you can do.
**[18:06] ---**
Okay! Aira will be a girl
who she can really be proud of!
**[18:14] ---**
*Child...*
**[18:16] ---**
*Where is... my child?*
**[18:22] ---**
*Aira...*
**[18:26] ---**
*That's right...
I remember now.*
**[18:29] ---**
*I was Aira's...*
**[18:31] ---**
*Mommy.*
**[18:36] ---**
*I will protect her.*
**[18:38] ---**
*So that nobody harms her...*
**[18:42] ---**
*I will...*
**[18:46] ---**
She came back to life!
**[18:48] ---**
Momo-chan, what's wrong?
What did she do to you?
**[18:52] ---**
I can take her down
if she does something weird, right?
**[18:55] ---**
I'll go full throttle.
**[18:57] ---**
Wait!
**[19:00] ---**
Stop... Please...
**[19:05] ---**
I'm sorry, Aira...
**[19:08] ---**
I swore that I would protect you...
**[19:11] ---**
but what I did was hurt you.
**[19:16] ---**
I can't even control my own emotions.
**[19:20] ---**
I have turned into a monster.
**[19:23] ---**
So I will end it all now.
**[19:28] ---**
Hey! She keeps falling apart.
What's gonna happen to her?
**[19:32] ---**
I told you. Aura is like a battery.
Without it, you perish.
**[19:37] ---**
And she's leaving regrets behind.
She won't be able to rest in peace.
**[19:41] ---**
What will happen, then?
**[19:43] ---**
That's pretty much a given.
**[19:46] ---**
The void. Nothing will be left of her.
**[19:49] ---**
It'll be like she never existed in any world.
**[19:53] ---**
The living and the dead...
Everyone will forget about her.
**[19:58] ---**
Well, I'm sure her life
was worthless anyway.
**[20:01] ---**
Losing the existence
of someone like her ain't much.
**[20:05] ---**
It shouldn't be like that.
**[20:07] ---**
It's too cruel!
**[20:09] ---**
Isn't there something?
Something to let her rest in peace?
**[20:13] ---**
Nothing. Whether or not she can
rest in peace is up to her heart.
**[20:17] ---**
There's nothing strangers can do.
**[20:33] ---**
*I wish I could've
bought you more lovely clothing.*
**[20:42] ---**
*I wish I could've
played with you a lot more.*
**[20:47] ---**
*More... properly... more...*
**[20:52] ---**
If you weren't born as my child...
**[20:56] ---**
You would have been
so much more happier...
**[20:59] ---**
I made you so unfortunate...
**[21:04] ---**
I'm so sorry...
**[21:20] ---**
Mommy.
**[21:23] ---**
I love you.
**[21:31] ---**
I was the happiest person in the universe.
**[21:44] ---**
*Please, so that nobody ever hurts them...*
**[21:51] ---**
*take them to a more fortunate,
kinder world.*
**[22:08] ---**
I won't forget. I swear.
**[23:42] ---**
Momo, you're home?
**[23:43] ---**
Yeah. We found a ball,
but only one of them.
**[23:46] ---**
I see.
**[23:47] ---**
Grandma, I'm hungry.
**[23:48] ---**
Wanna eat somen?
**[23:49] ---**
That sounds great!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 8 I'VE GOT THIS FUNNY FEELING
**[23:51] ---**
Next episode,
"I've Got This Funny Feeling."
**[23:53] ---**
Looks like I ran out of soup base.
Guess I'll go buy some.
# 8 - I've Got This Funny Feeling
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:28] ---**
Hey.
**[00:30] ---**
The reason why you hate me so much is cuz
I dropped a washtub on your head, right?
**[00:37] ---**
I have no intent
on being chummy with you.
**[00:40] ---**
But I don't feel like
being enemies, either.
**[00:43] ---**
I went a bit too far that time.
**[00:45] ---**
Sorry.
**[00:50] ---**
So you, too.
**[00:51] ---**
Apologize to Okarun since
you made fun of him.
**[00:55] ---**
Then we'll call it even, okay?
**[00:58] ---**
You really don't get it at all, Momo Ayase.
**[01:03] ---**
I wouldn't call you my sworn enemy
because of a washtub.
**[01:07] ---**
I'm after you because I'm positive
that you're a demon!
**[01:15] ---**
I told you that I wasn't!
**[01:17] ---**
You're nothing but trouble if you poke at me
because of a misunderstanding!
**[01:20] ---**
Then what the hell is he!?
**[01:23] ---**
Takakura-kun fighting Acrobatic Silky
looked just like a demon.
**[01:29] ---**
Besides!
**[01:30] ---**
There's no way she's your grandmother!
**[01:33] ---**
She's too pretty and way too young!
**[01:35] ---**
What's that?
**[01:37] ---**
She's a really good girl!
**[01:39] ---**
Yeah, Momo is a demon.
**[01:40] ---**
You shut up, old hag!
You're complicating things!
**[01:44] ---**
I knew it.
**[01:46] ---**
Takakura-kun and Auntie are demons.
**[01:48] ---**
And you're the big boss in charge of them!
**[01:51] ---**
You're trying to destroy the world, I bet.
***SIGN*** ARE YOU A TOTAL IDIOT!?
***SIGN*** IF I HAD SUCH POWERS, I'D START OFF
***SIGN*** BY BLOWING YOUR HEAD OFF!
***SIGN*** DON'T GO DAYDREAMING LIKE SOME EIGHTH GRADER!
***SIGN*** BLOW MY HEAD OFF?
***SIGN*** BLOW MY HEAD OFF? NOW YOU'RE SHOWING YOUR TRUE COLORS!
***SIGN*** BLOW MY HEAD OFF? NOW YOU'RE SHOWING YOUR TRUE COLORS! RIGHT NOW, I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH POWER TO BEAT YOU.
***SIGN*** BUT I'M SURE I'LL BECOME STRONGER AND BEAT YOU!
***SIGN*** SOUNDS GREAT! TRY ME IF YOU CAN!
***SIGN*** SOUNDS GREAT! TRY ME IF YOU CAN! I'LL BEAT YOU TO A PULP!
***SIGN*** SOUNDS LIKE YOU UNDERESTIMATE ME,
***SIGN*** SOUNDS LIKE YOU UNDERESTIMATE ME, BUT YOU'RE FORGETTING ONE THING.
***SIGN*** SOUNDS LIKE YOU UNDERESTIMATE ME, BUT YOU'RE FORGETTING ONE THING. I HAVE BEEN CHOSEN TO PROTECT WORLD PEACE!
**[02:31] ---**
Because I'm just too cute!
**[02:35] ---**
Thanks for having me!
**[02:36] ---**
The somen noodles were tasty, Auntie!
**[02:38] ---**
Hold on, damn you!
**[02:39] ---**
I'm not done talking to you!
**[02:42] ---**
Keep trying hard, Aira.
Blow Momo away!
**[02:46] ---**
Auntie here is cheering for you.
**[02:48] ---**
Damn it, you old hag!
Why are you rooting for her?
**[02:51] ---**
Huh?
**[02:53] ---**
Takakura-kun.
**[02:56] ---**
Despite being a demon,
you tried to save me multiple times.
**[03:02] ---**
Why?
**[03:05] ---**
It's because he's not a demon!
**[03:09] ---**
I have no reason.
**[03:12] ---**
If someone's in trouble,
you'd help them, wouldn't you?
**[03:16] ---**
I see.
**[03:18] ---**
You still have a human heart left in you.
**[03:22] ---**
I will make sure to liberate you
from Momo Ayase's control!
**[03:35] ---**
Hey! What was that?
**[03:36] ---**
She's got a tremendous misunderstanding.
**[03:38] ---**
There's something
seriously wrong with her!
**[03:42] ---**
*This feeling is so wrong.*
**[03:45] ---**
*I'm a human, and he's a demon.*
**[03:50] ---**
*It's wrong!*
**[05:24] ---**
Hold on!
**[05:25] ---**
Can't you do this a bit more normally!?
**[05:27] ---**
Quit your whining.
**[05:29] ---**
I'm putting yer ball back in for ya.
**[05:33] ---**
Let's play a tight game!
***SIGN*** THE POWER OF NESSIE
**[05:38] ---**
- And why're you trying to bat?
- Pitcher's jittery! Hey, hey, hey!
**[05:42] ---**
Jittery? Who're ya talkin' to?
**[05:47] ---**
When you see my Turbo Granny Ball...
**[05:50] ---**
you won't be spoutin' such nonsense!
**[05:55] ---**
Such cheeky talk!
**[06:09] ---**
Strike! Batter out!
**[06:11] ---**
When a ball strikes your nuts,
ya gotta jump!
**[06:13] ---**
No!
**[06:16] ---**
So? Is it back in there?
**[06:18] ---**
It's back!
**[06:20] ---**
I have one ball back!
**[06:23] ---**
- Hurray!
- All right!
**[06:24] ---**
That pitch was high and inside.
**[06:27] ---**
I'll hit it next time.
**[06:28] ---**
Smokin' ball, huh?
**[06:31] ---**
Good for you, Okarun.
You got a testicle back.
**[06:34] ---**
It's so embarrassing!
**[06:36] ---**
That aside...
**[06:37] ---**
We have no clues for the other one.
**[06:41] ---**
You're right.
**[06:42] ---**
Okarun, you don't have a computer?
**[06:45] ---**
Can't you look at occult forums
or something?
**[06:47] ---**
I'm sorry, I don't have one.
**[06:50] ---**
Guess I'll add more part-time jobs
and buy a smartphone.
**[06:52] ---**
A four-year loan is a serious rip-off.
**[06:56] ---**
So I'll see you at the roof during lunch?
**[07:00] ---**
U-Um, I'm sorry, Miss Ayase.
**[07:05] ---**
I'd like to work on a report during lunch.
**[07:09] ---**
Oh. I see.
**[07:12] ---**
Wanna head to an internet café
after school?
**[07:15] ---**
I'm sorry. I also have
something after school.
**[07:22] ---**
All right. I get it.
***SIGN*** I'VE GOT THIS FUNNY FEELING
***SIGN*** EPISODE 8 I'VE GOT THIS FUNNY FEELING
**[07:26] ---**
I'm starving.
**[07:28] ---**
Let's eat together!
**[07:30] ---**
Huh? Where's Okarun?
**[07:32] ---**
He said he's working on a report.
**[07:34] ---**
So noble! Maybe I'll have him
work on mine, too.
**[07:36] ---**
Okarun is so serious.
**[07:41] ---**
But it's kinda suspicious.
**[07:44] ---**
Huh? What's that?
**[07:45] ---**
It's like totally obvious
that he's hiding something.
**[07:48] ---**
A scent of a woman?
**[07:51] ---**
No.
**[07:53] ---**
Okarun's the last person
I'd suspect that, but...
**[07:58] ---**
Nah. It couldn't be.
**[08:02] ---**
I'm gonna go buy a drink.
**[08:04] ---**
Then can you get me one, too?
A Pompy.
***SIGN*** POMPY ORANGE
**[08:16] ---**
*What is this?*
**[08:18] ---**
*I feel so uneasy.*
**[08:22] ---**
*Should I peek into Class C?*
**[08:26] ---**
*No, I don't want to bother him.*
**[08:29] ---**
*He's writing a report after all.*
**[08:51] ---**
Fourteen... Fifteen... Sixteen...
Seventeen... Eighteen...
**[08:58] ---**
Nineteen... Twenty.
**[09:04] ---**
I'm no good like this.
**[09:06] ---**
As I look for my golden ball,
**[09:09] ---**
I'm sure another dangerous monster
will show up, and I'll have to fight it.
**[09:18] ---**
*Push-ups, sit-ups,
back extensions, and squats.*
**[09:23] ---**
*Five sets, 100 reps each.*
**[09:25] ---**
*I have to become strong.
A lot stronger.*
**[09:29] ---**
If I don't, I'll be putting
Miss Ayase in harm's way.
**[09:34] ---**
Takakura-kun.
**[09:39] ---**
Miss Shiratori.
**[09:43] ---**
D-Do you need something?
**[09:46] ---**
You're a demon, and I'm a human.
**[09:51] ---**
I know that it will never be...
**[09:53] ---**
I'm not a demon, though.
**[09:56] ---**
I can't hold back how I feel!
**[09:58] ---**
Takakura-kun! You just stay still!
**[10:00] ---**
- Huh? What the...
- Don't move.
**[10:02] ---**
- Just close your eyes.
- But...
**[10:13] ---**
Hey!
**[10:14] ---**
Why are you dodging me?
You're so weird, Takakura-kun!
**[10:17] ---**
Wait.
**[10:18] ---**
You're the weird one!
**[10:20] ---**
Why would you do that out of the blue?
**[10:21] ---**
I mean...
**[10:22] ---**
I mean, when you confess your love,
you have to kiss that person, right?
**[10:25] ---**
Huh!?
**[10:26] ---**
It said so in a book!
***SIGN*** WEEKLY TRUE ACCOUNTS FULL NUDE PHOTOS "JUNGLE SPRING"
**[10:28] ---**
That confessing equals a kiss!
**[10:30] ---**
And that it's the responsibility
of the guy to accept that confession!
**[10:34] ---**
That's a mistake!
**[10:35] ---**
What did you use as your reference?
**[10:37] ---**
U-Um...
***SIGN*** ROMANCE MANUAL VOL.8 (R-18)
**[10:39] ---**
It was the one in Dad's study!
**[10:41] ---**
That's something completely different!
**[10:44] ---**
Miss Shiratori, you're totally popular
with all the boys.
**[10:47] ---**
Why are you acting like
you're an amateur in relationships?
**[10:49] ---**
- You like mature lips?
- I didn't say that!
**[10:52] ---**
Can you stop this?
**[10:54] ---**
A popular girl
shouldn't be doing something like this.
**[10:56] ---**
Don't equate popularity and romance!
**[10:59] ---**
You don't know the effort
behind popularity!
**[11:01] ---**
And I'm not an amateur in relationships!
**[11:03] ---**
I just don't know about them!
Don't mock me!
**[11:05] ---**
That's exactly who the phrase describes!
**[11:08] ---**
And right now,
you've got every last thing wrong!
**[11:11] ---**
I've never felt this way before.
Let me confess!
**[11:15] ---**
A-Are you insane!?
**[11:18] ---**
Or are you possessed
by something again?
**[11:20] ---**
Hold on, Miss Shiratori.
**[11:51] ---**
Um, uh...
**[11:53] ---**
Takakura-kun.
**[11:55] ---**
Hurry up.
**[12:00] ---**
No, wait. This is...
**[12:02] ---**
Why you little turd...
**[12:07] ---**
Miss Ayase! You got it wrong!
**[12:09] ---**
This is nothing like what you think.
**[12:11] ---**
You said you were going to work on a report,
but you're making out with that damn girl.
**[12:16] ---**
You took your jacket off
and you're even sweating.
**[12:18] ---**
What's that on your arms?
Part of your kinky play?
**[12:20] ---**
I have reasons for all of this!
**[12:23] ---**
I don't want to hear excuses.
**[12:25] ---**
Was the report thing a lie?
**[12:27] ---**
Th-That was a lie.
**[12:29] ---**
I've had enough.
**[12:30] ---**
But there's a reason for...
**[12:32] ---**
I said, I've had enough!
***SIGN*** POMPY ORANGE
**[12:43] ---**
Where's my Pompy?
**[12:45] ---**
I gave it to the ground.
**[12:46] ---**
What's that? A new gag?
**[12:49] ---**
They didn't have any?
**[12:51] ---**
- Hold on. I'm thinking right now.
- Huh?
***SIGN*** STRIKING QUICKLY WITH RAPTORIAL LIMBS, IT BREAKS CLAMS TO EAT. DURING TERRITORIAL BATTLES AGAINST OTHER MANTIS SHRIMP IS WHEN THEY ALSO UNLEASH PUNCHES.
**[12:55] ---**
A mantis shrimp's punches
clock at 80 kilometers per hour.
**[12:58] ---**
It has the force of roughly 150 kilograms.
**[13:01] ---**
If you scale it to human size,
it's roughly 700 tons.
**[13:04] ---**
You can defeat elephants with such a punch.
**[13:06] ---**
It's this effective underwater
with all that resistance.
**[13:10] ---**
How destructive do you think it'd be
if it was unleashed in air?
**[13:14] ---**
Actually, that's still an unknown.
**[13:16] ---**
Because a mantis shrimp is thought
to hold back on its punches while in air.
**[13:19] ---**
I see, I see. You too have times when
you simply want to punch something.
**[13:21] ---**
Perhaps the mantis shrimp realizes that
because its punches have too much force.
**[13:24] ---**
She just talked to a mantis shrimp!
**[13:25] ---**
Unleashing one in the air may injure
its joints at best, and burst its arm at worst.
**[13:26] ---**
She's got it pretty bad.
**[13:39] ---**
There is...
**[13:41] ---**
...no mistake.
**[13:42] ---**
She's been possessed
by the spirit of a mantis shrimp!
**[13:47] ---**
*Miss Ayase is right about this.*
**[13:49] ---**
*It's pointless to make excuses.*
**[13:52] ---**
*If I'd gotten stronger without
her knowing, I thought it'd be kinda cool.*
**[13:56] ---**
*I even made an effort to lie.*
**[13:58] ---**
*I've sown the seeds myself.*
**[14:00] ---**
*If I care about Miss Ayase,*
**[14:03] ---**
*I shouldn't make excuses,
and just get stronger!*
**[14:20] ---**
Hey! Is anyone here!?
**[14:25] ---**
Miss Shiratori!
**[14:27] ---**
Takakura-kun!
**[14:29] ---**
Miss Shiratori, where's everyone else?
**[14:31] ---**
What's going on?
**[14:33] ---**
It's pitch black outside the window.
What happened?
**[14:37] ---**
Can this be Momo Ayase's doing?
**[14:40] ---**
Come to think, where's Miss Ayase?
**[14:44] ---**
Miss Ayase, are you in here?
**[14:46] ---**
She's not here.
**[14:49] ---**
*This feeling... I've experienced
something similar in the past.*
**[14:58] ---**
Damn it. I'm completely locked in.
**[15:01] ---**
This seriously sucks!
**[15:04] ---**
The water level is rising, too!
**[15:07] ---**
I wonder what happened to Okarun.
**[15:09] ---**
Or is this only happening to me?
**[15:11] ---**
Sheesh! When I think about him,
I get so pissed off!
**[15:15] ---**
What's up with this water, anyway!?
**[15:24] ---**
What the...
**[15:27] ---**
Something's totally approaching.
**[16:00] ---**
What is that? A dinosaur?
**[17:51] ---**
Sheesh! Is Okarun not here?
**[17:56] ---**
What was that sound?
**[17:59] ---**
I don't know.
But it sounded like an explosion.
**[18:01] ---**
Hey, what exactly
is this situation we're in?
**[18:04] ---**
Are you and Momo Ayase
trying to frame me?
**[18:07] ---**
Of course not.
I'd like to ask what's going on myself.
**[18:11] ---**
But something similar to this
happened in the past.
**[18:14] ---**
It was pitch black outside,
and we were completely walled in.
**[18:19] ---**
What did you do back then?
**[18:21] ---**
Well, when we defeated the alien,
it went back to normal.
**[18:25] ---**
Alien?
**[18:27] ---**
Hold on a second. Aliens exist?
**[18:30] ---**
They do!
**[18:31] ---**
To be honest, they're even worse
than yokai monsters!
**[18:33] ---**
Huh? Then why do aliens assault us?
**[18:36] ---**
Well, I don't know.
**[18:39] ---**
It seems like they're collecting
human reproductive organs.
**[18:46] ---**
Chiquitita, you have a dream?
**[18:51] ---**
Chi-Chiquitita, Chi-Chiquitita-chi.
**[18:55] ---**
Chiquitita. Chiquitita, you have a dream?
**[18:58] ---**
Chi-Chiquitita, Chi-Chi-Chiquitita.
**[19:01] ---**
Chi-Chi-Chiquitita.
Sh-Shy my chotchiki for you.
**[19:03] ---**
This makes me wilt.
**[19:05] ---**
Chi-Chiquitita, Chi-Chi-Chiquitita-chi.
**[19:07] ---**
Man, what a bother.
**[19:08] ---**
Chi-Chi-Chiquitita.
Chiquitita, you have a dream?
**[19:09] ---**
It's impossible for me to protect a girl.
**[19:10] ---**
Chi-Chi-Chi-Chi-Chiquitita.
**[19:12] ---**
Chi-Chi-Chiquitita.
Chi-Chi-Chiquitita.
**[19:15] ---**
Sh-Shy my chotchiki for you.
**[19:17] ---**
Uh, ah, west and east.
**[19:17] ---**
Aira-chan. You're in the way, so get lost.
**[19:20] ---**
"A-Aira-chan"?
**[19:20] ---**
Uh, ah, north and south.
**[19:22] ---**
We haven't even kissed yet.
Don't call me that!
**[19:24] ---**
Uh, ah, morning, noon, and night.
**[19:25] ---**
I feel so droopy.
**[19:28] ---**
We're gig workers.
**[19:36] ---**
Takakura-kun!
**[19:40] ---**
We finally meet, man person.
**[19:44] ---**
Serpoians.
**[19:47] ---**
Hold on, you guys!
**[19:49] ---**
Get away from him!
**[19:51] ---**
I will take you on!
**[19:52] ---**
Miss Shiratori, run for it!
**[19:55] ---**
These guys target women!
**[20:01] ---**
Miss Shiratori!
**[20:03] ---**
We adjusted this void space so that
only those with high spirituality can enter.
**[20:09] ---**
Is the apparatus malfunctioning?
**[20:11] ---**
We came here because
we just want your banana organs.
**[20:15] ---**
We want it.
**[20:17] ---**
We want it.
**[20:18] ---**
Damn it!
**[20:19] ---**
Why is everything after my junk?
**[20:23] ---**
Because it's something good.
**[20:25] ---**
You have an amazing power
that surpasses our scientific technology.
**[20:31] ---**
We want your abilities.
**[20:34] ---**
We'd love to experiment on you...
**[20:36] ---**
...and transplant your abilities to us.
**[20:40] ---**
That's the power of a curse.
**[20:42] ---**
It's not my own abilities
or anything like that!
**[20:45] ---**
I personally have less physical power
than the average person!
**[20:50] ---**
Curse? What kind of
banana organ condition is that?
**[20:54] ---**
Like I'd know!
**[20:56] ---**
*Damn it. I can't transform at all.*
**[20:59] ---**
*It feels like when Miss Ayase is holding back
the curse with her psychic powers.*
**[21:13] ---**
Then let's get to it...
**[21:15] ---**
...and perform the operation.
**[21:18] ---**
First, let us cut off the banana organ.
**[21:23] ---**
Stop it!
**[21:24] ---**
I still only have one testicle!
**[21:40] ---**
It seems that
I am the chosen one after all.
**[21:52] ---**
Let go of Takakura-sama!
**[23:27] ---**
I'm human, and he's a demon.
**[23:30] ---**
I know it's wrong,
but I can't hold these feelings back.
**[23:32] ---**
I'm going to save Takakura-sama from the hands
of the evil boss demon, Momo Ayase!
**[23:36] ---**
I told you, you're wrong!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 9 MERGE! SERPO DOVER DEMON NESSIE!
**[23:37] ---**
Next episode,
"Merge! Serpo Dover Demon Nessie!"
**[23:40] ---**
Listen to me!
# 9 - Merge! Serpo Dover Demon Nessie!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] ---**
A-Acrobatic Silky?
**[00:05] ---**
Ouch!
**[00:07] ---**
Takakura-sama, are you all right?
**[00:09] ---**
Ow.
**[00:11] ---**
What a lewd state you are in!
**[00:13] ---**
To expose yourself to me like that...
**[00:16] ---**
It must mean you're presuming
a betrothal already!
**[00:18] ---**
Very well!
**[00:20] ---**
You have powers as well?
**[00:22] ---**
I see, so that is why you were able
to enter our void space.
**[00:27] ---**
We will take your banana organs
while we're at it.
**[00:29] ---**
- Labor, labor...
- Hold on!
**[00:31] ---**
Let me put something on!
**[00:32] ---**
Takakura-sama, I will deal with them!
**[00:35] ---**
Full of defects, covered in mud,
that's fine, that's fine.
**[00:39] ---**
Yup, that's fine, that's fine, now...
Labor!
**[00:45] ---**
Serpoian Form Serpogrammetry!
**[00:51] ---**
Wait up!
**[00:53] ---**
Don't include me in your attack!
**[00:55] ---**
You're a cheap hire. There are
countless replacements for you.
**[00:58] ---**
*What was that just now?*
**[01:00] ---**
*I feel like I crashed into an invisible wall.*
**[01:03] ---**
Snap!
**[01:05] ---**
Chiquitita, you have a dream?
Shy my chotchiki for you.
**[01:08] ---**
Chiquitita, you wake from a dream?
**[01:09] ---**
Shy my chotchiki for you.
**[01:12] ---**
This is...
**[01:14] ---**
This is...
**[01:15] ---**
Where are the clothes?
**[01:17] ---**
Jet Punch!
**[01:24] ---**
That's a respectable punch.
**[01:26] ---**
Thank you, deez!
**[01:28] ---**
But if it doesn't connect,
it's not much of anything.
**[01:32] ---**
Snap!
***SIGN*** TAKAKURA
**[01:37] ---**
Serpoian Form Serpogrammetry!
**[01:39] ---**
Hold it! Stop that!
**[01:41] ---**
What a nuisance!
**[01:43] ---**
You seem to be in love with me.
**[01:46] ---**
Not one bit.
**[01:47] ---**
I'm sorry. I already have
someone in my heart.
**[01:51] ---**
But I'll give you as many chances
as you need to try to win my heart.
**[01:56] ---**
That is...
**[02:00] ---**
...the conditions of an attractive lady.
**[02:02] ---**
Argh! My head is stuck!
**[02:05] ---**
Now, I'll take the nuisance...
**[02:10] ---**
I have caught you, woman person.
**[02:14] ---**
What is this? It's going to crush me!
**[02:16] ---**
You just thought, "You can use psychic powers
even without saying Serpogrammetry," yes?
**[02:22] ---**
I don't care about any of that!
**[02:23] ---**
I didn't overlook the fact
that you dropped your guard.
**[02:27] ---**
I don't care about that!
Just let me out of this!
**[02:29] ---**
But this is quite interesting.
**[02:31] ---**
There are multiple persons with special powers
in the same location.
**[02:35] ---**
There is hope for us
to seek further evolution.
**[02:38] ---**
Your movements are remarkable...
**[02:41] ---**
...but you are not all too powerful.
**[02:43] ---**
This wasn't in the plans, but we will take
your banana organs as well while we're at it.
**[02:48] ---**
I am the chosen one!
I won't lose to the likes of you!
**[02:52] ---**
The light of hope will come
from the heavens and—
**[02:53] ---**
Chiquitita.
**[03:03] ---**
That's right. You have been chosen.
**[03:06] ---**
Chosen for our evolution.
**[03:08] ---**
Now, let's begin.
**[03:09] ---**
Hold on just a second!
**[03:25] ---**
You were after me, weren't you?
**[03:29] ---**
I'll take you on right now!
**[03:32] ---**
Takakura-sama! You're still...
**[03:34] ---**
There are things that are
more important than clothes!
**[03:46] ---**
Man, I hate this. I wanna go home...
**[03:49] ---**
That's right, that's right.
We want your banana organs.
**[03:53] ---**
However...
**[03:55] ---**
We can do both of you simultaneously.
**[03:57] ---**
As long as there are three of us.
**[04:01] ---**
This is...
**[04:02] ---**
The transformation is wearing off.
**[04:05] ---**
This is possible when the three of us
combine our psychokinesis.
**[04:09] ---**
The Awesome Zone.
**[04:12] ---**
Inside this area...
**[04:13] ---**
...all transformations...
**[04:14] ---**
...let alone standing up...
**[04:16] ---**
...will be impossible.
**[04:17] ---**
- However...
- ...this...
**[04:18] ---**
- ...has...
- ...one...
**[04:20] ---**
...flaw.
**[04:21] ---**
We cannot enter there, either.
**[04:24] ---**
Thus...
**[04:28] ---**
We will have him beat you up
until you can no longer move.
**[04:32] ---**
Stop that! If you do that, he'll die!
**[04:35] ---**
Please, stop!
**[04:52] ---**
Impossible!
**[04:52] ---**
He broke through the Awesome Zone?
**[04:54] ---**
No, he didn't!
**[04:55] ---**
Our psychokinesis
is being repelled by someone!
**[04:59] ---**
Oh no! The woman person is here!
**[05:01] ---**
Momo-chan, I really missed you.
**[05:04] ---**
Okarun, you moron!
**[05:05] ---**
Don't you be making out with that bitch!
**[05:09] ---**
I'd never forget your damn faces!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 9
MERGE!
SERPO DOVER DEMON NESSIE!
**[06:50] ---**
Momo-chan, I really missed you.
**[06:52] ---**
Shut up! Don't look at me, you perv!
**[06:55] ---**
Until we harvest
the man person's banana organ...
**[06:57] ---**
...we wanted the woman person
under confinement! That's what we told it!
**[07:00] ---**
What exactly is that thing doing?
**[07:02] ---**
It's annoying that Momo Ayase is rescuing me,
but I have no choice.
**[07:06] ---**
You shall lend us a hand!
**[07:07] ---**
Wait, is that Acro-Silky?
**[07:09] ---**
I'll help you out, but I won't let you
have Ken Takakura-sama!
**[07:14] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[07:15] ---**
Come on, Momo Ayase!
What are you doing?
**[07:17] ---**
You have to hold them back
with your magic!
**[07:19] ---**
I don't know how,
but we have the advantage!
**[07:22] ---**
Let's wake up the Gig Worker now!
**[07:25] ---**
Damn it! Do your job properly
or we'll lower your pay!
**[07:28] ---**
Sorry, this is a bit impossible.
**[07:30] ---**
You're such a bother!
**[07:33] ---**
No! Anything but that!
**[07:36] ---**
Stop!
**[07:39] ---**
*Yellow and black
is the mark of courage.*
**[07:43] ---**
*Are you able to fight 24 hours?*
**[07:47] ---**
*Regain, Regain, our own Regain.*
**[07:51] ---**
*The mark of courage on our briefcases.*
**[07:55] ---**
*Can you fight far off in a distant world?*
**[07:59] ---**
*Business Man!*
**[08:01] ---**
*Business Man!*
**[08:03] ---**
*Japanese Business Man!*
**[08:12] ---**
That's right!
**[08:13] ---**
Take them...
**[08:14] ---**
...and beat them up...
**[08:15] ---**
...so they can't move anymore!
**[08:20] ---**
Man, you irritate me.
**[08:23] ---**
You mention that name, you die.
**[08:26] ---**
So powerful!
**[08:27] ---**
Our psychic powers are being pushed back!
**[08:29] ---**
Gig Worker! Go after that woman person!
**[08:33] ---**
I won't let you.
You're not going to ignore me.
**[08:37] ---**
Makes me wilt.
**[08:38] ---**
If we don't have that
psychic thing going, it's all ours!
**[08:42] ---**
Salary...
**[08:44] ---**
Uppercut!
**[08:47] ---**
I can't see the attack!
**[08:48] ---**
That thing is bad news!
**[08:50] ---**
Mantis!
**[08:54] ---**
He dodged!
**[08:55] ---**
I can see this thing's punches.
**[08:58] ---**
Mantis!
**[09:03] ---**
You said that I am lacking in power,
didn't you?
**[09:10] ---**
Then...
**[09:12] ---**
I'll simply nail
your weak spot multiple times.
**[09:15] ---**
I am one with Takakura-sama!
**[09:18] ---**
Hey! You guys are way too close!
**[09:20] ---**
You guys will both get blown away!
**[09:22] ---**
Oh my, are you jealous?
**[09:23] ---**
As if!
**[09:24] ---**
Momo-chan, that's great advice.
**[09:26] ---**
I am an awkward fellow after all.
**[09:30] ---**
Do you guys wanna die?
**[09:31] ---**
I'm sorry, Miss Ayase!
**[09:33] ---**
Come on, get a grip already!
**[09:34] ---**
You're the one in charge of holding back
their weird powers!
**[09:37] ---**
Sheesh, you are so useless.
**[09:39] ---**
Your pay will be cut by 60 percent.
**[09:42] ---**
N-No way.
**[10:01] ---**
What was that just now?
**[10:03] ---**
Water!
**[10:04] ---**
My feet don't touch the bottom!
**[10:05] ---**
What's going on here?
**[10:11] ---**
The wall and ceiling is all water now!
**[10:21] ---**
Crap.
**[10:29] ---**
It's here.
**[10:37] ---**
Crap, crap, crap!
**[10:38] ---**
We're gonna escape for now!
**[10:39] ---**
Hold on! Why are you calling the shots?
I'm the leader here!
**[10:43] ---**
It's Nessie!
**[10:44] ---**
Takakura-kun is getting excited.
He's so cute.
**[10:47] ---**
Damn you guys!
**[10:48] ---**
No, we're in Kamigoe City,
so should I call it Kamissie?
**[10:51] ---**
Oh, fine! Then you guys can get
real chummy and stare at Nessie!
**[10:54] ---**
I'm outta here!
**[10:55] ---**
Oh, so that thing is called Nessie?
**[10:58] ---**
Takakura-kun, you know so much.
**[11:00] ---**
Come on! What have you been doing?
**[11:02] ---**
You weren't able to hold back
the woman person at all!
**[11:06] ---**
You're also getting a 60 percent pay cu...
**[11:15] ---**
How could you?
**[11:16] ---**
Nessie is really bad news!
**[11:17] ---**
- Why are you attacking us?
- That's what I've been saying!
**[11:19] ---**
You're supposed to get
that woman person over there!
**[11:21] ---**
Hey! Takakura-kun, wait...
**[11:27] ---**
Miss Shiratori!
**[11:30] ---**
That was from him?
**[11:31] ---**
Business Punch!
**[11:34] ---**
Does he punch harder underwater?
**[11:37] ---**
Is he a Mantisian that has
the characteristics of a mantis shrimp?
**[11:40] ---**
Mantis! Mantis!
**[11:42] ---**
Yours truly can exert
real power underwater!
**[11:46] ---**
The underwater punching power
of yours truly is ten times that on land.
**[11:51] ---**
Huh?
**[11:58] ---**
Ten times!
**[11:59] ---**
Still need air, huh?
**[12:01] ---**
Get him!
**[12:03] ---**
You should be able to swim at pretty high speed
with Turbo Granny's leg strength!
**[12:06] ---**
Makes me wilt.
**[12:14] ---**
I'm gonna die!
**[12:15] ---**
I can't swim!
**[12:17] ---**
Turbo Granny can't swim!
**[12:19] ---**
Huh?
**[12:26] ---**
This is the worst situation ever!
**[12:27] ---**
How are we supposed to fight like this?
**[12:29] ---**
I don't know the answer either!
**[12:31] ---**
We're in trouble if we take too long!
**[12:33] ---**
If we don't hurry up and save
that stupid girl, she'll drown!
**[12:35] ---**
Miss Ayase, what about your psychic powers?
**[12:37] ---**
I can reach if we're right below her,
**[12:39] ---**
but that mantis shrimp guy
is in the way and I can't get close!
**[12:41] ---**
Then I'll draw that guy's attention,
**[12:43] ---**
so please grab Miss Shiratori
in the meantime!
**[12:45] ---**
What are you talking about?
**[12:47] ---**
If you just plunge in like that, you'll end up
exactly like that stupid girl!
**[12:50] ---**
Don't make things harder for me, okay?
**[12:52] ---**
You don't have to say it like that!
**[12:54] ---**
I'm just trying to make myself useful!
**[12:56] ---**
And it doesn't mean jack
if you cause even more trouble!
**[12:58] ---**
That's why I said we need to hurry up and run!
**[13:00] ---**
You guys are at fault
for making out all the time!
**[13:02] ---**
We weren't making out!
**[13:04] ---**
You've been making out!
This whole time!
**[13:06] ---**
You pinned her down on the ground
in the courtyard!
**[13:08] ---**
So it was bothering you!
**[13:09] ---**
No, it's not!
**[13:10] ---**
I don't care what some liar
is doing with some stupid girl!
**[13:14] ---**
Hold on a second!
**[13:17] ---**
If you actually care,
then tell me honestly that you do!
**[13:21] ---**
If it's weighing on your mind,
please let me explain myself!
**[13:25] ---**
I don't care how much other people
will take things the wrong way,
**[13:28] ---**
but I don't want you
to have the wrong idea, Miss Ayase!
**[13:31] ---**
I want you to have a proper understanding
of everything!
**[13:37] ---**
Don't touch me, pervert!
**[13:39] ---**
Oh, sorry.
**[13:40] ---**
How can you say that
when you look like that?
**[13:42] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[14:00] ---**
I'm sorry!
That was beyond my control!
**[14:03] ---**
I won't touch you ever again!
**[14:04] ---**
That's a great idea!
**[14:05] ---**
Huh?
**[14:07] ---**
Okarun, stay still!
**[14:08] ---**
Huh?
**[14:10] ---**
This is rough.
**[14:11] ---**
All right, let's try it.
**[14:13] ---**
Stop with your futile resistance!
**[14:17] ---**
What the hell is that?
**[14:19] ---**
I grab Okarun really hard,
and push him forward!
**[14:23] ---**
I propel him with my psychic powers
as if I'm catching a lively fish, and ride it!
**[14:28] ---**
You can't escape attacks from yours truly!
**[14:33] ---**
Get up there!
**[14:51] ---**
That's amazing!
**[14:52] ---**
Miss Ayase, you're such a genius!
**[14:53] ---**
I know that!
**[14:55] ---**
Hey, come on. Wake up!
**[14:58] ---**
She probably swallowed a lot of water.
**[15:00] ---**
Don't hate me for this, okay?
**[15:02] ---**
Forced resuscitation!
**[15:04] ---**
Miss Shiratori! I'm glad!
**[15:08] ---**
Is this a dream?
**[15:09] ---**
You dumbass!
We haven't resolved anything yet!
**[15:12] ---**
Take your clothes off! It's hard to move you
when there's water resistance.
**[15:15] ---**
Huh?
**[15:16] ---**
I've already decided I'm not stripping down
until my wedding night!
**[15:18] ---**
Strip!
**[15:22] ---**
It's not fair that you escaped upwards!
**[15:25] ---**
Oh, right now yours truly
has them cornered.
**[15:29] ---**
Give me a bit more time.
**[15:35] ---**
What?
**[15:36] ---**
Each and every one of you are useless!
**[15:39] ---**
His attack power is amazing, but he's so stupid
he assaults everything in sight.
**[15:44] ---**
Gig Worker has high attack power underwater,
**[15:47] ---**
but he takes too many breaths
and the enemy ends up escaping.
**[15:50] ---**
Sorry.
**[15:52] ---**
That's enough. This is a case
where we will all merge together.
**[15:55] ---**
We will use this Body Cable to become one.
***SIGN*** YOU MUST ASSUME RESPONSIBILITY AND RAISE AN ANIMAL FOR ITS ENTIRE LIFE!
**[16:00] ---**
You have to assume responsibility.
**[16:01] ---**
Takakura-kun, you saw me in lingerie.
**[16:04] ---**
I did not.
**[16:05] ---**
You in lingerie is only worth
one piece of candy.
**[16:09] ---**
Anyway, I need both of you
to get fired up!
**[16:11] ---**
We can't win unless we all use
everything we've got!
**[16:14] ---**
Sure.
**[16:14] ---**
Don't tell me what to do!
I'm the leader!
**[16:17] ---**
Here goes!
**[16:18] ---**
One, two...
**[16:42] ---**
What a shame. Ran out of water.
**[16:50] ---**
That was close!
**[16:51] ---**
What was that?
Is that even possible?
**[16:56] ---**
Miss Ayase, look at that!
It's pooling water into its neck!
**[17:00] ---**
So it can't shoot continuously!
**[17:02] ---**
Which means, if we break that thing's neck,
it can't shoot lasers anymore!
**[17:06] ---**
Let's do it!
**[17:07] ---**
Now might be our chance!
Let's get close and attack!
**[17:27] ---**
You just thought we only had
the high-compression water blast, didn't you?
**[17:32] ---**
We may look like this, but we are
a close-combat in-fighter UMA.
**[17:40] ---**
*Oh no!*
**[17:54] ---**
Hey, get a grip! Are you okay?
**[17:58] ---**
That hurt! I'm not okay!
**[18:01] ---**
Then you're fine!
**[18:02] ---**
That thing has the punching guy's arm!
**[18:05] ---**
When did they merge together?
We can't get close like that!
**[18:09] ---**
That damn Serpoian brought the punching guy
to cover for Nessie's weakness all along!
**[18:15] ---**
It's too strong! Laser beams
and mantis shrimp punches...
**[18:17] ---**
We might've had a chance on land,
but there's nothing we can do underwater!
**[18:21] ---**
Okarun, what'd you just say?
**[18:22] ---**
There's nothing we can do!
**[18:24] ---**
Not that one!
**[18:25] ---**
You said mantis shrimp punches?
**[18:41] ---**
Too bad.
**[18:42] ---**
The high-compression water blast
has run out yet again.
**[18:46] ---**
But we have endless ways to kill you.
**[18:50] ---**
You are a very dangerous person,
so we will kill you first then dissect you.
**[18:55] ---**
We can simply wait for you to drown
but we have used a bit too much time.
**[18:59] ---**
Can we punch you to death?
**[19:19] ---**
Wh-What?
**[19:21] ---**
What is going on here?
**[19:23] ---**
You shouldn't have merged together
with that Mantisian.
**[19:27] ---**
A mantis shrimp's punching powers
are unparalleled underwater.
**[19:30] ---**
But on land, it can never
unleash a punch at full strength.
**[19:34] ---**
Including him.
**[19:35] ---**
If he tried to go all-out,
he'd have ended up like you now.
**[19:39] ---**
He'd have imploded
from the impact of his own punch.
**[19:48] ---**
I can stay underwater like this
for hours on end!
**[19:52] ---**
But what about you?
**[19:54] ---**
Will you drown first? Or will you be severed
by the high-compression water blast first?
**[20:09] ---**
I can't swim.
**[20:12] ---**
But if there's a path to run...
**[20:15] ---**
I can go full throttle.
**[20:17] ---**
Hold on just a second!
**[21:07] ---**
We're back?
**[21:10] ---**
We defeated them?
**[21:16] ---**
The ground is hard.
This is the hallway!
**[21:20] ---**
Thank you, hallway.
**[21:23] ---**
Thank you for being so hard!
**[21:26] ---**
What's that about?
**[21:30] ---**
I dunno. It's hilarious.
**[21:33] ---**
Huh?
**[21:34] ---**
What are they doing?
**[21:35] ---**
These guys are buck naked and hugging!
**[21:42] ---**
Ayase from Class B
and that four-eyes is going at it!
**[21:44] ---**
No!
**[21:46] ---**
No!
**[21:49] ---**
The prim Miss Shiratori
from Class D is naked, too!
**[21:53] ---**
Why is this happening?
**[21:54] ---**
Why are they all naked?
**[23:27] ---**
Nessie was simply too wicked!
**[23:28] ---**
Was it a surviving Plesiosaur?
**[23:30] ---**
But I never thought
it would merge with an alien.
**[23:33] ---**
The merger between an UMA and an alien
is like a dream for me!
**[23:35] ---**
Takakura-kun, you know so much.
***SIGN*** EPISODE 10 HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A CATTLE MUTILATION?
**[23:37] ---**
Next episode,
"Have You Ever Seen a Cattle Mutilation?"
**[23:39] ---**
Man, I was caught in a weird situation.
This really sucks!
# 10 - Have You Ever Seen a Cattle Mutilation?
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** EPISODE 10 HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A CATTLE MUTILATION?
**[01:38] ---**
Are you making a fool of me?
**[01:43] ---**
I'll ask just one more time.
**[01:46] ---**
You guys being bullied?
**[01:51] ---**
No, ma'am.
***SIGN*** SCHOOL NURSE QUEEN-SENSEI
**[01:56] ---**
Don't hide it. Just tell me.
**[01:59] ---**
I have zero tolerance for bullying.
**[02:03] ---**
I am on your side.
**[02:07] ---**
Thanks, ma'am.
**[02:10] ---**
Queen-sensei, you have a call
in the teacher's office.
**[02:14] ---**
Damn baldie!
**[02:15] ---**
I told ya, don't open the door
without knocking first!
**[02:20] ---**
I'm sorry, Queen-sensei!
**[02:22] ---**
Looks like you need some discipline.
**[02:24] ---**
- Discipline? Um...
- Rotten scumbag. Cue balls like you...
**[02:30] ---**
I'm stepping out for a bit.
You guys can stay as long as you like.
**[02:36] ---**
Thanks, ma'am.
**[02:38] ---**
What am I gonna do?
People saw me in a weird situation!
**[02:41] ---**
My popularity! My innocent image!
**[02:45] ---**
More like, them aliens
are way too persistent!
**[02:48] ---**
If they keep assaulting us like that,
I won't be able to stand it!
**[02:52] ---**
On top of that, they were targeting me.
**[02:55] ---**
It seems like they were after
Turbo Granny's powers.
**[02:59] ---**
Hey, by the way...
**[03:02] ---**
Since when have you been able
to use Acro-Silky's powers?
**[03:06] ---**
Just now. My powers awakened
during the battle.
**[03:10] ---**
I mean, I was chosen
as a "Pretty Soldier" after all.
**[03:14] ---**
Your title keeps changing so much.
**[03:16] ---**
Well, we did transfer Acro-Silky's aura
to you, so I guess it's possible.
**[03:21] ---**
But if that's the case, it's highly likely that
Miss Shiratori will also be targeted by them.
**[03:25] ---**
*Takakura-kun is worried about me.*
**[03:28] ---**
We were able to fend them off
because we had yokai powers.
**[03:30] ---**
But as long as we have these powers,
the aliens will be targeting us.
**[03:34] ---**
But isn't it strange?
**[03:36] ---**
If they want yokai powers,
they should just attack the yokai directly.
**[03:40] ---**
You're right.
**[03:42] ---**
No, wait. That's exactly it!
**[03:44] ---**
The aliens, despite having astounding
scientific technology, are not invading Earth.
**[03:48] ---**
There's much debate about that,
and I was always curious about it!
**[03:53] ---**
They can't because
we have yokai monsters around!
***SIGN*** INJURED - 4 PEOPLE
HEAT STROKE - 3 PEOPLE
**[03:56] ---**
They're not just in Japan!
**[03:57] ---**
Folklore about spirits and demons
exist all over the world!
**[04:00] ---**
In other words, yokai and demons
are protecting the Earth from alien invasion!
**[04:05] ---**
Even with their scientific technology,
aliens can't beat yokai.
**[04:08] ---**
Thus, they're attacking special humans
like us for research,
**[04:11] ---**
and they're trying to develop technology
to win against the yokai!
**[04:15] ---**
I'm sure of it!
**[04:17] ---**
There's a chance they already took
my missing family jewels!
**[04:21] ---**
Oh crap! We gotta hurry and find it!
**[04:24] ---**
The story went too epic
and I totes missed the point!
**[04:26] ---**
So what? Are we in trouble?
**[04:28] ---**
I get it! I still hold
the fate of the world in my hands!
**[04:33] ---**
Fine, we'll go with that.
**[04:35] ---**
Anyway, people saw me naked!
**[04:39] ---**
Ugh, don't remind me of reality!
**[04:42] ---**
I'm sure nobody would believe
anything we'd say anyway.
**[04:46] ---**
Oh, what to do!
**[04:47] ---**
That's it!
**[04:48] ---**
I'll just say that Miss Ayase stripped me!
**[04:51] ---**
Hey!
**[04:52] ---**
It's not a lie, is it?
**[04:53] ---**
You did tell me to strip down.
**[04:55] ---**
Takakura-kun, you should go with that, too.
**[04:57] ---**
Huh?
**[04:58] ---**
Fine, you can go with that.
**[04:59] ---**
But if we do that, then you...
**[05:01] ---**
I'm kinda tired. Making excuses
sounds like a pain in the ass.
**[05:04] ---**
- Aira, are you okay?
- What happened to you?
**[05:07] ---**
You surprised me!
**[05:09] ---**
Oh! Momo Ayase, is this your fault?
**[05:11] ---**
Uh, um...
**[05:13] ---**
Let's go, Aira!
**[05:14] ---**
Wait, hold on. Miss Ayase, if you don't hurry,
you'll turn into the villain!
**[05:18] ---**
I could care less.
**[05:20] ---**
You don't care?
**[05:22] ---**
More than any of this...
**[05:24] ---**
Okarun, give me your excuse
for that other thing.
**[05:28] ---**
What were you doing there
during lunch break?
**[05:31] ---**
That was...
**[05:32] ---**
Miss Shiratori tried to kiss me
out of the blue.
**[05:35] ---**
Huh!?
**[05:36] ---**
It's true!
**[05:37] ---**
We got into a tussle because of that,
**[05:39] ---**
and when we both fell over,
that's when you happened to see us.
**[05:43] ---**
So then, what were you
doing there to begin with?
**[05:47] ---**
C'mon. C'mon.
**[05:52] ---**
I was working out.
**[05:54] ---**
Like push-ups and stuff.
**[05:56] ---**
Oh?
**[05:57] ---**
I wanted to become stronger.
**[06:00] ---**
And why'd ya want to keep it a secret?
**[06:03] ---**
Um...
**[06:05] ---**
If I got stronger without you knowing,
I thought it would be kinda cool.
**[06:10] ---**
Say what? Hilarious!
**[06:11] ---**
Okarun, you have a vain side, too?
**[06:13] ---**
O-Of course I do.
**[06:15] ---**
I am a guy after all.
**[06:18] ---**
I want you to think I'm a cool guy.
**[06:27] ---**
I see, I get it.
**[06:30] ---**
Lemme see your face.
**[06:32] ---**
D-Don't tease me!
That's the bad thing about you.
**[06:36] ---**
So why? Why do you want me
to think you're cool?
**[06:38] ---**
Huh? I told you.
It's because I'm a guy!
**[06:41] ---**
Why do you want people to think that
just because you're a guy?
**[06:44] ---**
Huh?
**[06:45] ---**
That's enough of that!
**[06:48] ---**
I'll be going now!
**[06:50] ---**
I won't say anything
that'll make you the villain though.
**[06:54] ---**
Okarun.
**[07:18] ---**
Found Momo!
**[07:19] ---**
Okarun is here, too!
**[07:21] ---**
Whoa! You surprised me!
**[07:22] ---**
No, that's our line.
**[07:24] ---**
You suddenly disappeared on us
during class!
**[07:26] ---**
Kana contacted us.
I was totally spooked.
**[07:28] ---**
She said you and Okarun were hugging
each other naked in front of Class D.
**[07:32] ---**
But we were all in chemistry lab, right?
**[07:34] ---**
So what's going on?
**[07:37] ---**
Even if I told you,
you wouldn't understand.
**[07:40] ---**
That's just how things ended up.
**[07:42] ---**
I see.
**[07:43] ---**
Isn't that a little too vague?
**[07:45] ---**
All the mysteries
have been unraveled.
**[07:46] ---**
Whoa, amazeballs!
**[07:51] ---**
You. There's a person
named Shiratori in Class D.
**[07:55] ---**
So uh, do you know her?
**[08:01] ---**
Well, yeah.
**[08:04] ---**
My investigations show that
Shiratori in Class D was also naked.
**[08:11] ---**
Which brings us to Momo, Okarun,
and Shiratori.
**[08:15] ---**
Where a love triangle emerges...
**[08:19] ---**
Whoa.
**[08:20] ---**
Which means, this is...
**[08:24] ---**
all for one man.
**[08:28] ---**
A war between two women.
***SIGN*** NUDE GLADIATOR COMBAT
**[08:35] ---**
It means we had some
Nude Gladiator Combat!
**[08:42] ---**
Momo was talking to that mantis shrimp
**[08:44] ---**
because she wanted Master Mantis to teach her
to punch so she could knock Shiratori's lights out!
**[08:49] ---**
What the hell?
**[08:50] ---**
*Teach me.*
**[08:51] ---**
Momo was sulking the whole time
**[08:53] ---**
because she was jealous of Shiratori!
**[08:55] ---**
Shut that trap!
**[08:56] ---**
I ain't jealous of her!
**[08:58] ---**
You are the culprit!
**[09:00] ---**
Hold on! Stop it!
**[09:02] ---**
Aira, are you okay?
**[09:03] ---**
What in the world happened!?
**[09:05] ---**
I'll help out in any way possible
if it's for you, Miss Shiratori!
**[09:09] ---**
Thank you, everyone.
**[09:11] ---**
Aira is mammoth-happy!
**[09:13] ---**
But I don't really want to talk about
what happened.
**[09:16] ---**
So I'd be grateful
if you left me alone about this.
**[09:21] ---**
*I impress myself with how high
my own popularity is!*
**[09:24] ---**
*Times like this are when
your everyday efforts bear fruit.*
**[09:27] ---**
*This is how this incident will dissipate.*
**[09:30] ---**
It's Momo Ayase, isn't it?
She did this to you?
**[09:33] ---**
You've been harassed
by Momo Ayase lately.
**[09:37] ---**
Like that thing with the washtub.
**[09:39] ---**
No way. Really?
**[09:40] ---**
Momo Ayase's not getting away with this!
**[09:42] ---**
Maybe she's jealous
of Miss Shiratori's beauty?
**[09:45] ---**
What's her problem!?
**[09:46] ---**
I heard she'll sleep with any guy.
**[09:50] ---**
Oh, I know about that rumor!
It was going around a while back!
**[09:53] ---**
Shouldn't we punish her in some way?
Like spread word about her evil.
**[09:57] ---**
Right!
**[09:58] ---**
Let's teach her what happens
when you make our Miss Shiratori cry!
**[10:01] ---**
So true!
**[10:04] ---**
I'm the one who spread that fake rumor.
**[10:08] ---**
Hold on, Aira. What's wrong?
**[10:10] ---**
I'm at fault.
**[10:12] ---**
So please don't speak badly
of Momo Ayase.
**[10:30] ---**
What the?
**[10:31] ---**
What's going on?
**[10:50] ---**
I've done myself in.
**[10:52] ---**
My popularity...
**[10:54] ---**
Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid...
**[10:56] ---**
Hey, what are you doing?
**[11:01] ---**
Deranged as usual, I see.
**[11:03] ---**
Shut up! What do you want?
**[11:07] ---**
Nothing much.
**[11:11] ---**
How's it on your end? Were you able
to come up with a good excuse?
**[11:14] ---**
Huh?
**[11:15] ---**
W-Well, yeah. They're all filled
with hatred against you!
**[11:20] ---**
You say that, but you're all alone.
**[11:23] ---**
You always have people stringing
behind you like goldfish turds.
**[11:27] ---**
You've had enough, right?
Can you get lost?
**[11:30] ---**
I mean, you are my enemy!
**[11:38] ---**
I bet you didn't badmouth me.
**[11:41] ---**
Of course I did!
**[11:42] ---**
I said all kinds of bad stuff!
Got a problem with that?
**[11:46] ---**
Yeah, yeah.
**[11:51] ---**
I can't just go home like this.
**[11:56] ---**
I have to earn a living for my family.
**[12:02] ---**
This thing has the nerve to show up again!?
**[12:05] ---**
It's emitting some weird white fluid!
**[12:06] ---**
Chiquitita, you have a dream?
**[12:17] ---**
Huh? You okay?
**[12:20] ---**
Chiquitita.
**[12:25] ---**
Daddy!
**[12:27] ---**
Daddy!
**[12:33] ---**
I'm sorry, Chiquitita.
**[12:45] ---**
Th-This place is...
**[12:50] ---**
Grandma, see, look here!
This is an alien!
**[12:54] ---**
It doesn't feel like one.
Isn't this just a kappa?
**[12:57] ---**
No way! There's an alien right in front of you,
and you won't believe it? The hell?
**[13:02] ---**
It just doesn't feel like an alien.
**[13:04] ---**
This thing's totally a kappa.
**[13:05] ---**
No, actually, there are theories
that kappa are actually aliens!
**[13:09] ---**
Anyway, what are we gonna do
about this guy? We patched him up.
**[13:13] ---**
He might attack us again, you know.
**[13:18] ---**
You better not!
We got Grandma on our side!
**[13:25] ---**
Oh, that?
**[13:27] ---**
I had no idea what aliens eat,
so I just made some curry for now.
**[13:31] ---**
You don't have to eat it
if you don't want it.
**[13:41] ---**
You gave me proper medical attention.
**[13:44] ---**
Nobody has ever
been this kind to me before.
**[13:50] ---**
I will never ever
bring harm to you ever again.
**[14:02] ---**
Tastes awful!
**[14:04] ---**
Tastes awful!
**[14:08] ---**
Why you!
**[14:10] ---**
Don't you be eatin' just the fatty tuna!
**[14:12] ---**
You ate my sea urchin!
**[14:15] ---**
You're a guest!
Just stick to the pickled ginger!
**[14:17] ---**
If I'm a guest, treat me like one!
Bring me some blackthroat seaperch!
**[14:20] ---**
You're just a kappa!
Stick to cucumber rolls!
**[14:23] ---**
You left some sea urchin uneaten!
**[14:25] ---**
I was saving the best for last,
you schmuck!
**[14:29] ---**
You ugly idiot baldie!
**[14:30] ---**
Ugly scummy idiot baldie!
**[14:32] ---**
Each and every one of you are scum!
**[14:35] ---**
I'm never serving you guys sushi again!
**[14:40] ---**
My son is ill.
**[14:43] ---**
All his blood leaves his body
with his urine and feces.
**[14:46] ---**
He'll die unless he's given
new blood every day.
**[14:51] ---**
My wife died from the same illness.
**[14:54] ---**
For treatment, I need [$@$@].
**[14:57] ---**
What? Sorry, I didn't catch that.
**[14:59] ---**
It's what you guys call currency.
**[15:02] ---**
And I need tons of currency.
**[15:07] ---**
My [@@@@] is a warzone,
and can't provide me currency.
**[15:09] ---**
Huh? I really can't decipher
what you're saying.
**[15:12] ---**
So I must head out
and earn some foreign currency.
**[15:17] ---**
We [@@] have powerful bodies,
so we have jobs like bodyguards and [@/@].
**[15:24] ---**
But I am weak.
**[15:26] ---**
Degenerate [@@] like myself
can't find any work.
**[15:31] ---**
There are only outlaw jobs full of danger.
**[15:36] ---**
Because I'm...
**[15:38] ---**
Because I'm weak, my wife had to die,
**[15:42] ---**
I injured all of you, and my son
is facing so much hardship.
**[15:48] ---**
I'm so pathetic.
**[15:50] ---**
I'm so pathetic!
**[15:57] ---**
What can I do to help you?
**[15:59] ---**
If you have my weenie,
would that save your son?
**[16:01] ---**
Huh? What the hell
are you talking about? Stop that!
**[16:04] ---**
It'll be fine if he can just get paid.
**[16:07] ---**
I can go reclaim my weenie after that!
**[16:09] ---**
Reclaim? From where?
**[16:11] ---**
In the first place, if the treatment
is to get new blood every single day,
**[16:15] ---**
isn't it meaningless
to get just one cash payment?
**[16:18] ---**
It's tough for him, but he has to work
a proper job to keep paying for it!
**[16:22] ---**
He wants to work,
but he can't find a job!
**[16:25] ---**
How is he going to make a living?
**[16:27] ---**
I heard that he's in trouble, so I can't just
pretend like I didn't hear it.
**[16:31] ---**
I want to help!
**[16:33] ---**
Calm down.
I understand how you feel, though.
**[16:36] ---**
I'll get it back for you.
That is, your, um... you-know-what.
**[16:41] ---**
Keep quiet, you stupid girl!
**[16:42] ---**
When Takakura-kun is trying
to do something for someone else,
**[16:45] ---**
and if you can't support him,
you can't call yourself his partner.
**[16:49] ---**
Don't pretend like you're his partner!
**[16:54] ---**
What Miss Momo Ayase says is correct.
**[16:57] ---**
The only way is for me to find a proper job.
**[17:00] ---**
I was very happy about
Mr. Ken Takakura's consideration.
**[17:05] ---**
But you have been far too kind
to me already.
**[17:10] ---**
I have made a promise
that I will not harm you.
**[17:15] ---**
I'm sorry to stay so long.
**[17:18] ---**
Thank you so very much.
**[17:21] ---**
Hold it.
**[17:22] ---**
Your blood stinks.
**[17:24] ---**
Wait, what did you just say?
**[17:26] ---**
That's anti-alien!
Where's political correctness?
**[17:28] ---**
Shut up, you little turd.
**[17:30] ---**
Screw political correctness.
**[17:34] ---**
That white liquid of yours
is blood, yeah?
**[17:38] ---**
Those blood-soaked bandages
somehow smell familiar.
**[17:42] ---**
Huh?
***SIGN*** YUJI INTENSE MILK UNALTERED COMPONENTS TYPE: MILK
**[17:50] ---**
Try lapping up some of that.
**[18:01] ---**
Th-This is...
**[18:03] ---**
the same!
**[18:05] ---**
It's the same thing as our blood!
**[18:08] ---**
Huh? What the?
Grandma, what's going on?
**[18:11] ---**
His bandage reeked like that smell
when you use a dirty rag to wipe up some milk.
**[18:17] ---**
Milk is cow's "blood" to begin with,
but of all things kappa's blood was milk, too?
**[18:23] ---**
Seriously? Then you should take
tons of milk back with you!
**[18:25] ---**
Dover Demon's blood is milk.
**[18:27] ---**
But it's a little thin.
**[18:30] ---**
They homogenize it
so it's easy for humans to drink.
**[18:34] ---**
I'll ask a dairy farmer I know
to give you one whole cow.
**[18:39] ---**
Well, good luck with everything.
**[18:41] ---**
Take care of yourself.
***SIGN*** INTENSE MILK
**[19:01] ---**
*Thank you!*
**[19:04] ---**
*I will never forget this generosity!*
**[19:09] ---**
*If something ever happens,
I will make sure to be your ally!*
**[19:15] ---**
- It's Cattle Mutilation!
- A live Abduction!
**[19:15] ---**
Shut up! You're a nuisance to the neighborhood!
Hurry up and go home!
**[19:18] ---**
I will protect this planet!
So never come back again!
**[19:19] ---**
Amazing! So huge! So awesome!
**[19:23] ---**
*Hope we meet again!*
**[19:41] ---**
Grandma, you believe in aliens now, right?
**[19:44] ---**
Huh? That was just a kappa.
**[19:46] ---**
Huh? Okarun, say something
to this old hag!
**[19:49] ---**
There's a theory that kappa are aliens.
**[19:55] ---**
Please!
**[19:57] ---**
Buy us some school uniforms
with Ms. Dodoria's appearance fees!
**[20:01] ---**
How many times do I have
to buy your uniforms, you dumbasses?
**[20:06] ---**
Next time, we will wear them very carefully!
**[20:09] ---**
Is it okay for us, too?
**[20:10] ---**
We don't have any money.
**[20:12] ---**
In times like this, it's best to exploit
the financial power of adults.
**[20:16] ---**
By the way, this is the third time.
**[20:18] ---**
Aira and Four-Eyes,
I'll buy uniforms for you two.
**[20:22] ---**
Hold on!
Why am I not included?
**[20:25] ---**
I don't like your eyes.
**[20:27] ---**
Those eyes that want to exploit
the financial power of adults.
**[20:32] ---**
So until I say you're done...
**[20:34] ---**
do an impersonation of Hiroshi Abe.
**[20:36] ---**
Gimme a break!
I'd never do anything like that!
**[20:40] ---**
Come on, say it.
Who are you speaking to? Say it!
**[20:44] ---**
You okay with that?
With no deal for your uniform?
**[20:48] ---**
I don't care either way.
**[20:50] ---**
I don't wanna wear
a school uniform anyway.
**[20:57] ---**
What's with that face?
That's so out there!
**[20:59] ---**
*So cute.*
**[21:00] ---**
So?
**[21:01] ---**
That's nothing like him! How irritating!
**[21:05] ---**
Hey, Momo. You answer that.
Keep doing your impersonation, though.
**[21:09] ---**
Rocket Engine Valve.
**[21:11] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[21:12] ---**
Rocket Engine Valve.
**[21:13] ---**
I'm watching you from here.
You better not stop!
**[21:19] ---**
Rocket Engine Valve.
**[21:22] ---**
Hello.
**[21:23] ---**
I am Rocket Engine Valve.
**[21:26] ---**
Huh? Momo?
**[21:29] ---**
Jiji?
**[21:33] ---**
Yo. You're finally here.
I heard all about it from your mom.
**[21:37] ---**
Huh? What? Why is he here?
**[21:40] ---**
Who is that?
**[21:41] ---**
That guy is Momo's childhood friend...
**[21:50] ---**
and her first love.
**[23:27] ---**
What is this feeling I have?
**[23:28] ---**
Hey, you believe in aliens, right?
**[23:30] ---**
That was a kappa
no matter how you look at it.
**[23:31] ---**
Takakura-kun called it a Dover Demon.
**[23:34] ---**
I'm sure she's just shaken because
she witnessed Cattle Mutilation!
**[23:36] ---**
Next episode, "First Love."
***SIGN*** EPISODE 11 FIRST LOVE
**[23:38] ---**
By the way, outside of alien theories,
a kappa is called chupacabra in some regions.
# 11 - First Love
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] ---**
I'm watching you from over here!
You better not stop!
**[00:04] ---**
Rocket Engine Valve.
**[00:08] ---**
Hello.
**[00:09] ---**
I am Rocket Engine Valve.
**[00:13] ---**
Huh? Momo?
**[00:16] ---**
Jiji?
**[00:24] ---**
Yo. You're finally here.
I heard all about it from your mom.
**[00:27] ---**
Huh? What? Why is he here?
**[00:30] ---**
Who is that?
**[00:31] ---**
That guy is Momo's childhood friend...
**[00:36] ---**
and her first love.
**[00:45] ---**
*Miss Ayase's first crush?*
**[00:49] ---**
*He looks so cool.*
**[00:51] ---**
*From how he's dressed,
he's definitely an athlete.*
**[00:54] ---**
*He looks really sincere, too.*
**[00:56] ---**
*Miss Ayase falling for him
must mean that he's a proper guy.*
**[01:03] ---**
Momo, you're such a cutie!
**[01:09] ---**
And your terrible impression...
So priceless!
**[01:15] ---**
It's been a while, Momo.
**[01:18] ---**
Wanna hug for starters?
**[01:19] ---**
So annoying. What's with you?
**[01:21] ---**
I got me an "annoying"!
**[01:25] ---**
Gimme more!
**[01:27] ---**
Okarun, help me kill this guy.
**[01:30] ---**
Long time no see, Jiji.
**[01:32] ---**
Oh, good evening!
**[01:34] ---**
It's been a while!
**[01:36] ---**
You're still as beautiful as ever, Auntie!
**[01:38] ---**
You've grown up into quite the genius.
Well, come on in.
**[01:42] ---**
Huh? Wait a sec, what's going on here?
**[01:47] ---**
What? Isn't it obvious?
**[01:49] ---**
He's gonna live with us starting today.
**[01:54] ---**
Huh? What for?
**[01:57] ---**
Absolutely not!
**[01:58] ---**
"Absolutely!" and "Not!"
still means you like it!
**[02:04] ---**
Are you a genius?
**[02:05] ---**
Thanks for having me, fam!
**[02:08] ---**
Whoa! What about my permission!?
**[02:11] ---**
L-Live together?
**[02:13] ---**
It's too unnatural.
**[02:15] ---**
Is she getting another new demon?
**[02:20] ---**
Can it be that she's diligently
gathering allies
**[02:22] ---**
to prepare for the coming of Ragnarok,
the final war?
**[02:26] ---**
I don't think that's it.
**[02:28] ---**
I won't allow it, Momo Ayase!
**[02:31] ---**
What's up with you?
**[02:32] ---**
I can totally see through your schemes!
**[02:35] ---**
We're temporary allies
against the alien threat,
**[02:38] ---**
but once that's over, you're next!
**[02:41] ---**
Huh? Is she still hooked on that idea?
**[02:43] ---**
Seems so.
**[02:45] ---**
I will gather forces as well
to challenge your Ragnarok!
**[02:48] ---**
See you!
**[02:51] ---**
Thanks for your effort.
**[02:52] ---**
All these troublesome things
came rushing over at once!
**[02:57] ---**
Well, I'll head home now, too.
**[03:00] ---**
Oh. Okay.
**[03:04] ---**
Take care.
**[03:06] ---**
Okay.
**[03:26] ---**
Hey, Okarun.
**[03:36] ---**
Huh?
**[03:40] ---**
What is it?
**[03:44] ---**
"See you tomorrow!"
It's your turn to say it, Okarun!
**[03:49] ---**
Huh?
**[03:50] ---**
We're taking turns?
**[03:52] ---**
We are! So just say it!
**[03:54] ---**
Oh, er...
**[03:57] ---**
Um...
**[03:59] ---**
See you...
**[04:00] ---**
tomorrow.
**[04:04] ---**
Good.
**[04:06] ---**
Okay.
**[04:32] ---**
I'm not convinced.
***SIGN*** KEEP OUT JIJI'S ROOM
**[04:35] ---**
Why is Jiji living at our place?
Give me a proper explanation.
**[04:39] ---**
Auntie's cooking is too good!
**[04:43] ---**
Are you a genius?
**[04:45] ---**
Are you listening?
**[04:46] ---**
I told you already.
**[04:48] ---**
Both of Jiji's parents
have been hospitalized.
**[04:52] ---**
But why our place?
**[04:53] ---**
You usually go to a relative's house
in times like this.
**[04:56] ---**
You're so cold-hearted.
**[04:58] ---**
Society is about helping each other out.
**[05:01] ---**
Auntie, you're so cool.
**[05:03] ---**
Come on now, Jiji.
You really are a genius.
**[05:07] ---**
Make sure to eat up!
**[05:09] ---**
Tank you!
**[05:11] ---**
He just got you by the heartstrings!
**[05:13] ---**
Don't be dumb. Nobody's ever gotten me
by my heartstrings.
**[05:17] ---**
Auntie, you're a serious cutie!
**[05:20] ---**
Jiji, just how much of a genius are you?
**[05:23] ---**
Make sure to eat up, okay?
**[05:24] ---**
Tank you!
**[05:28] ---**
There's definitely something funny going on.
**[05:30] ---**
Tank you!
**[05:31] ---**
I meant something is weird!
**[05:34] ---**
Did we get along that well to begin with?
**[05:37] ---**
Back in grade school,
I made fun of you, Momo.
**[05:42] ---**
Looking back now, I seriously regret it.
**[05:45] ---**
Thing is...
**[05:47] ---**
I can see ghosts now.
**[05:51] ---**
Wait, did you pick up
a golden ball by any chance?
**[05:54] ---**
Golden ball?
**[05:55] ---**
Did I make a dirty joke at some point?
**[05:57] ---**
Oh, no. Forget I said that.
**[06:00] ---**
I moved away, so we went
to different middle schools, right?
**[06:04] ---**
We moved way out into the mountains.
**[06:07] ---**
I've always liked places with lots of nature.
**[06:10] ---**
And the new house was big and clean,
so I was all hyped up in the beginning.
**[06:16] ---**
But gradually, I started feeling
like something was off.
**[06:22] ---**
It's hard to explain, but the things
lying around, the toilet, the bathroom...
**[06:30] ---**
They were somehow different
than usual.
**[06:33] ---**
I told my parents,
but they wouldn't listen.
**[06:36] ---**
I had to convince myself
that I was imagining things.
**[06:40] ---**
I lived each day pretending
I didn't notice anything.
**[06:44] ---**
But it became so clear
and was telling me to look at it.
**[06:49] ---**
It went out of its way
to show itself before me.
**[06:55] ---**
And ever since, I see it all the time.
**[07:01] ---**
My parents' health started
going downhill from there.
**[07:05] ---**
That's why I asked famous
spirit mediums for an exorcism.
**[07:12] ---**
And when I did,
three of the five committed suicide.
***SIGN*** JUNE SUNHEIGHTS PHOTO FOR RECORDS
***SIGN*** DECEMBER VALLEY OF SNAKES PHOTO FOR RECORDS
***SIGN*** APRIL NORTHERN MOUNTAIN TRACKS PHOTO FOR RECORDS
**[07:18] ---**
Veteran spirit mediums couldn't exorcise it.
**[07:21] ---**
And the person they recommended me
as my last hope...
**[07:25] ---**
was Momo's Auntie.
**[07:30] ---**
So that's what's going on.
**[07:32] ---**
You should've just told me sooner!
**[07:34] ---**
That old hag didn't even mention
you were coming.
**[07:39] ---**
But it was probably the right thing
to do to come to us.
**[07:42] ---**
Momo.
**[07:43] ---**
I'm sorry.
**[07:44] ---**
Wait, can you stop that?
**[07:46] ---**
Sorry for what?
**[07:48] ---**
All sorts of stuff.
Like how I made fun of you in the past.
**[07:52] ---**
How I'm roping you
into something this dangerous.
**[07:55] ---**
If you're gonna apologize,
don't come asking for help.
**[07:59] ---**
It's fine. My grandma's really tough.
**[08:02] ---**
I'm sure she'll beat
that evil spirit with one blow.
**[08:06] ---**
I ain't gonna do nothing.
**[08:08] ---**
Huh?
**[08:09] ---**
Like I said, I can only use my powers
within Kamigoe City.
**[08:14] ---**
Momo will take on this request.
**[08:17] ---**
Say what? You didn't tell me this!
**[08:18] ---**
Hold up!
Did you just call Auntie "Grandma"?
**[08:22] ---**
Someone who couldn't see ghosts
can see them now.
**[08:27] ---**
Maybe that golden ball
has something to do with it.
**[08:31] ---**
If you take this request, I'll buy you
as many uniforms as you want.
**[08:36] ---**
So go blow down that cursed house.
**[10:10] ---**
Hey there! I transferred schools!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 11 FIRST LOVE
**[10:14] ---**
Bo-Bo-Bo-Boom!
**[10:18] ---**
I'm Jin Enjoji.
**[10:21] ---**
Please call me Jiji!
**[10:23] ---**
Whoa, he's cool!
**[10:24] ---**
He's a hottie!
**[10:28] ---**
Enjoji's parents...
**[10:29] ---**
You're such a cutie!
**[10:33] ---**
...uh, are both in the hospital now.
**[10:36] ---**
Oh, this is terrible. If I don't get
your contact info, it'll kill me!
**[10:39] ---**
I'm sure he's having a hard time,
so everyone, please help him out.
**[10:45] ---**
He'll be sitting next to Ayase.
You guys are relatives, right?
**[10:49] ---**
Nope! We're family!
**[10:51] ---**
We're neither of those.
**[10:53] ---**
Flashy guys are annoying.
**[10:54] ---**
Stabbed! Thank you for that
tasty roast from a beauty!
**[10:59] ---**
Beauty?
**[11:00] ---**
Momo, this guy's all good.
**[11:05] ---**
He's a hottie.
**[11:07] ---**
Hey! I'm a super hottie!
Pout, pout!
**[11:11] ---**
Wait, I'm being drawn ever closer.
**[11:13] ---**
It's because you're too cute.
**[11:15] ---**
What's with him? He's hilarious!
**[11:18] ---**
Oui!
**[11:19] ---**
Yeah, so who is he?
**[11:21] ---**
How to put it...
**[11:23] ---**
A childhood friend-type
from grade school.
**[11:28] ---**
We're living together!
**[11:30] ---**
What? For real?
**[11:31] ---**
Hey, stop that!
You'll start strange rumors!
**[11:34] ---**
Let me explain everything
properly in order.
**[11:36] ---**
- Wait, Momo...
- No, it's not...
**[11:37] ---**
Lovey...
**[11:40] ---**
dovey!
**[11:41] ---**
Momo and I are in
a parentally approved relationship!
**[11:45] ---**
Living together?
**[11:47] ---**
Seriously?
**[11:47] ---**
You can't do that!
**[11:49] ---**
Momo already has Okarun!
**[11:54] ---**
"Jealous" is an "adjective"
which describes nouns.
**[11:58] ---**
For instance, you can
"be jealous of another's happiness."
**[11:59] ---**
*It's bugging me.*
**[12:01] ---**
*Miss Ayase's first crush...*
**[12:04] ---**
*Does she still like him?*
**[12:07] ---**
*He called Miss Ayase "Momo,"
and said she was cute.*
**[12:14] ---**
*Could their feelings be mutual?*
**[12:19] ---**
So "beautiful" and "cool"
are adjectives as well.
**[12:22] ---**
*If Miss Ayase were to start dating him...*
**[12:27] ---**
*will she stop being so kind to me?*
**[12:31] ---**
*I'm sure she'll be interested in
his hobbies and lose interest in the occult.*
**[12:36] ---**
*I won't be able to talk about
the occult during recess anymore.*
**[12:39] ---**
*Maybe I won't be able to hang out
with Miss Ayase anymore.*
**[13:02] ---**
*I'm no good.*
**[13:09] ---**
Stop distracting yourself, Ken!
**[13:12] ---**
Physical training is more important
right now than such thoughts!
**[13:24] ---**
Oh, there you are.
**[13:27] ---**
What're you doing?
Practicing a new ultimate move?
**[13:34] ---**
Miss Ayase, you already ate lunch?
**[13:37] ---**
I'm gonna eat here.
**[13:39] ---**
Huh?
**[13:40] ---**
I'm watching over you
so you don't do anything funny again.
**[13:44] ---**
Watching over me?
**[13:45] ---**
That incident with Miss Shiratori
wasn't my fault.
**[13:50] ---**
Okarun, did you eat lunch?
**[13:52] ---**
Not yet.
**[13:54] ---**
If both your hands are tied up...
**[13:56] ---**
I'll feed you.
**[13:58] ---**
Huh?
**[14:00] ---**
I-Is that all right?
**[14:04] ---**
Momo!
**[14:06] ---**
Oh? You're the guy
who was at Momo's place yesterday.
**[14:09] ---**
You a friend?
**[14:14] ---**
What do you want? Weren't you gonna eat
with Miko and the others?
**[14:17] ---**
Oh? Is Momo-chan jealous?
Such a cutie!
**[14:21] ---**
As if.
**[14:23] ---**
Check it out!
**[14:24] ---**
Yogurt-flavored Pompy!
**[14:28] ---**
Are you serious?
**[14:30] ---**
Present for you, woo!
**[14:41] ---**
*This is futile.*
**[14:43] ---**
*I can't watch Miss Ayase amicably
talk to that guy any longer.*
**[14:48] ---**
*I'll try not to see her anymore.*
**[14:50] ---**
*That will be the best move for myself,
and for Miss Ayase.*
**[14:57] ---**
I'm not gonna give up!
**[15:03] ---**
Oh.
**[15:09] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[15:15] ---**
I'm scared!
**[15:17] ---**
Get outta my way!
**[15:20] ---**
Nobody can stop me!
**[15:23] ---**
Huh? What is it this time?
**[15:24] ---**
Whoa, what's that?
Seriously wicked!
**[15:27] ---**
Stop right there, you half-wit!
**[15:29] ---**
Momo, let's run for it!
**[15:30] ---**
Don't get in my way!
**[15:32] ---**
Momo!
**[15:33] ---**
Don't say I didn't warn you!
**[15:45] ---**
Okarun! His ball...
**[15:46] ---**
It's golden!
**[15:47] ---**
Momo, hide behind me!
**[15:50] ---**
- Jiji, calm down!
- Hold it!
**[15:52] ---**
You're not getting away!
**[15:56] ---**
You've got some nerves!
**[16:01] ---**
Okarun!
**[16:02] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[16:04] ---**
- Stop this guy!
- Momo! Hang onto me!
**[16:06] ---**
Wait, you right there!
Get away from Miss Ayase!
**[16:26] ---**
I don't like it.
**[16:28] ---**
I want him to get away from her.
**[16:58] ---**
Damn you! I know you're trying
to stop me, but I won't stop!
**[17:03] ---**
You make me limp.
**[17:05] ---**
Another monster came out!
**[17:07] ---**
Okarun!
**[17:13] ---**
- Okarun!
- Momo-chan! The power lines!
**[17:29] ---**
Momo-chan! Where is he?
**[17:32] ---**
There!
**[17:35] ---**
Thanks, Okarun! You're a lifesaver!
**[17:38] ---**
A monster captured us!
**[17:39] ---**
I'll protect you, Momo!
**[17:41] ---**
Stop that! Okarun is on our side!
He was with us earlier!
**[17:44] ---**
No way! For real?
**[17:46] ---**
Here goes!
**[17:50] ---**
All right, Okarun, brace yourself!
**[17:52] ---**
Jiji, help us out!
**[18:06] ---**
Give up already, you piece of crap!
**[18:09] ---**
We'll slowly pull him here!
**[18:12] ---**
No way! I'm not gonna give up!
I don't wanna give up!
**[18:21] ---**
Ew! Gross!
**[18:26] ---**
Merge!
**[18:42] ---**
Momo, he's getting away!
**[18:43] ---**
Okarun, after him!
**[18:50] ---**
No good. We lost sight of him.
**[18:54] ---**
S-So amazing.
He transformed and stuff.
**[18:57] ---**
What should we do? We don't even
know which way he went.
**[19:06] ---**
This way!
**[19:07] ---**
Huh? What was that?
**[19:17] ---**
Miss Ayase, what have you been doing?
***SIGN*** KEEP OUT
**[19:25] ---**
Here?
**[19:29] ---**
Is it all right to barge in without asking?
**[19:34] ---**
Oh.
**[19:39] ---**
Goddamn it.
**[19:40] ---**
I was so close.
**[19:42] ---**
Miss Ayase, how did you know
where he was headed to?
**[19:47] ---**
He looks like he's exhausted?
**[19:50] ---**
When he split apart to escape,
I managed to grab just his heart.
**[19:55] ---**
I punched it on a hunch, and that
was when I heard him screaming in agony.
**[20:00] ---**
Freaky!
**[20:01] ---**
Woo! Not bad!
**[20:04] ---**
I feel a little sorry for him.
**[20:09] ---**
It's not like we want to catch and eat you.
**[20:12] ---**
If you'll promise not to run away,
I'll give you your heart back.
**[20:16] ---**
So can you show us your golden nuts?
**[20:20] ---**
It might be one of my friend's.
**[20:22] ---**
Miss Ayase, can you
please say it more delicately?
**[20:25] ---**
Are dirty jokes that popular nowadays?
**[20:30] ---**
Taro? Is that you, Taro?
**[20:35] ---**
Hana!
**[20:36] ---**
Where are you, Hana?
**[20:37] ---**
Hana!
**[20:39] ---**
No! Don't come here!
Please go back, Taro!
**[20:42] ---**
No way! I will never give up!
**[20:45] ---**
I won't give up on you, Hana!
**[20:50] ---**
What? What's going on here?
**[20:59] ---**
I found you!
**[21:01] ---**
I finally found you!
**[21:02] ---**
Why did you come here?
**[21:04] ---**
Why did you put yourself
through so much danger?
**[21:07] ---**
Because I love you!
**[21:12] ---**
Everything changed after I met you.
**[21:17] ---**
My world used to be grey,
but thanks to you,
**[21:21] ---**
it became so colorful!
**[21:24] ---**
We can't!
**[21:25] ---**
Our manufacturer's dates
are too far apart!
**[21:29] ---**
We live in different worlds!
**[21:31] ---**
My duties are all over!
Please hurry back.
**[21:34] ---**
Otherwise you'll turn into
oversized trash, too!
**[21:37] ---**
I don't care.
**[21:38] ---**
You're the one I fell in love with.
I won't let go of you no matter what!
**[21:42] ---**
Let's run away together!
**[21:43] ---**
If I don't do anything right here and now,
I'll regret it for the rest of my life!
**[21:48] ---**
Taro!
**[23:27] ---**
UMAs were all said to be nonsense,
**[23:29] ---**
but they are "Unidentified Mysterious Animals"
so they are simply "unidentified" biologically!
**[23:33] ---**
What's suddenly gotten into you?
**[23:34] ---**
Woo! You're so passionate, Okarun!
**[23:35] ---**
Next episode,
"Let's Go to the Cursed House"!
***SIGN*** EPISODE 12 LET'S GO TO THE CURSED HOUSE
**[23:38] ---**
- So, what got into you now?
- In other words, I'll never give up!
# 12 - Let's Go to the Cursed House
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GG5H5XQ0D/dan-da-dan)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:01] ---**
We beg you!
**[00:03] ---**
Please keep her in this house!
**[00:06] ---**
Put her in your house.
**[00:08] ---**
That's impossible!
**[00:09] ---**
I can only think of the Ayase residence
that can take in someone like this!
**[00:12] ---**
We already got a cat, so why not?
**[00:14] ---**
Don't lump me together
with a nobody like that!
**[00:17] ---**
That thing doesn't even eat!
**[00:19] ---**
So what happened
to the male one anyway?
**[00:23] ---**
It went back to the chemistry room.
**[00:25] ---**
Huh?
**[00:26] ---**
"I can stay an anatomical model without
worries as long as Hana is okay," he said.
**[00:31] ---**
But in return, he's gonna
sneak outta school at night
**[00:34] ---**
and he'd like to see Hana then.
**[00:36] ---**
We have to rely on
your magnanimous heart, Auntie!
**[00:39] ---**
Please!
**[00:40] ---**
Please!
**[00:43] ---**
Sheesh. Anatomical models
getting in heat, huh?
**[00:47] ---**
Just be lovey-dovey without
bothering the neighbors.
**[00:50] ---**
Anyway, what about the ball?
**[00:53] ---**
Oh, about that...
**[00:54] ---**
It was just a Christmas ornament.
**[00:57] ---**
Crazy.
**[00:59] ---**
Kinda like when animals make
their butts glow when they're courting?
**[01:03] ---**
Then it can't be helped.
**[01:04] ---**
No, I'm not convinced at all.
**[01:06] ---**
We're gonna eat, so pull the table out.
**[01:09] ---**
Okarun, you'll eat too, right?
**[01:11] ---**
Oh, sure. I'd love to.
**[01:15] ---**
Man, what a pain.
**[01:17] ---**
Momo, you have
some amazing powers, huh?
**[01:20] ---**
I understand why Auntie
trusted you to do the exorcism!
**[01:23] ---**
And Okarun, too!
That transformation was wicked!
**[01:26] ---**
It was so badass!
**[01:28] ---**
I wish I had some kind of power, too.
**[01:31] ---**
Oh, well, um...
**[01:33] ---**
I'm getting the table out
so can you guys move?
**[01:35] ---**
Oh, let me help!
**[01:38] ---**
Thanks. Hold that end.
**[01:40] ---**
Roger that!
**[01:43] ---**
Come on!
You're just getting in my way!
**[01:47] ---**
Oh, Momo, hold on.
**[01:52] ---**
Got some lint.
**[01:56] ---**
Yeah. Thanks.
**[01:58] ---**
Gimme more thanks, yeah?
**[02:00] ---**
Just move, please.
**[02:02] ---**
I'll get outta the way after one more.
**[02:03] ---**
Then I'll never say it.
**[02:07] ---**
*You're the one I fell in love with.
I won't let go of you no matter what!*
**[02:12] ---**
*If I don't do anything right here and now,
I'll regret it for the rest of my life!*
**[02:17] ---**
Miss Ayase!
**[02:19] ---**
There's lint!
**[02:24] ---**
Got it. Sorry about that.
**[02:27] ---**
Thanks.
**[02:28] ---**
And what's wrong?
**[02:29] ---**
I decided that
I'm not going to hold back.
**[02:32] ---**
I decided that
I'm going to fight adamantly.
**[02:35] ---**
Against what?
**[02:38] ---**
*I'm looking at only you*
**[02:42] ---**
*Since the day I met you,
all the way to right now*
**[02:47] ---**
*I want to shout that I love you*
**[02:51] ---**
*Let's try to change tomorrow*
**[02:53] ---**
Hey, morons. You're in the way.
**[02:55] ---**
Settle down!
**[02:57] ---**
You'll kick up dust all over the place!
**[02:58] ---**
Sorry, ma'am!
**[02:59] ---**
And Momo, you're gonna stay over
at Jiji's place this weekend
**[03:03] ---**
so you better have your
underwear and stuff ready.
**[03:04] ---**
Hey! Why would you
say stuff like that?
**[03:07] ---**
Miss Ayase? At Mr. Jiji's house? Why!?
**[03:10] ---**
What? I didn't tell you?
**[03:13] ---**
Jiji's house is cursed
and he wants it exorcised.
**[03:17] ---**
That's why he came to our place.
**[03:23] ---**
Miss Ayase, were you going
to go there all alone with Mr. Jiji!?
**[03:26] ---**
Of course not.
**[03:28] ---**
I was planning on asking you
to come along, Okarun.
**[03:30] ---**
I'd feel a bit uneasy doing it by myself.
**[03:32] ---**
Then let's hurry up and get it done!
**[03:34] ---**
Let's resolve it quickly and have
Mr. Jiji hurry on home!
**[03:38] ---**
Thank you! Woo!
**[03:40] ---**
What? What now?
**[03:46] ---**
Crap! School at night is super scary!
**[03:50] ---**
Isn't it bad to go in without permission?
**[03:51] ---**
It's fine. We're just gonna
play with a Ouija board.
**[03:55] ---**
I'll film it on video.
**[03:56] ---**
Huh? Hold on,
do you hear something?
**[03:59] ---**
Come on, stop that.
**[04:05] ---**
- No way. For real?
- What? No, scary!
**[04:12] ---**
You're in the way! Stand aside!
***SIGN*** KAMIGOE CITY STATION
**[04:28] ---**
Wait for me, Hana!
**[04:29] ---**
I'm coming to see you right now!
**[04:31] ---**
Hana!
**[04:49] ---**
He's not here yet.
**[04:53] ---**
And it's four o'clock already.
**[05:04] ---**
It's fine. I'll wait here
with you until he shows up.
**[05:09] ---**
I'm sure he'll come.
**[05:13] ---**
It'll be okay.
**[05:41] ---**
Sorry for being late, Hana.
**[05:44] ---**
Taro.
**[05:47] ---**
I love you.
**[06:15] ---**
Crap. I fell asleep.
**[06:17] ---**
What? Hey!
**[06:18] ---**
If you're here, you should wake me up!
**[06:21] ---**
Thank you so much, Miss Momo!
**[06:24] ---**
You were waiting with her!
**[06:26] ---**
I had a lot happen tonight, but starting
tomorrow, I will make sure to come on time.
**[06:30] ---**
You're gonna come every day?
***SIGN*** KEEP OUT JIJI'S ROOM
**[06:44] ---**
Damn it, I can't sleep again tonight.
**[06:54] ---**
Because of him.
**[08:28] ---**
I'll pretend to take this,
***SIGN*** EPISODE 12
LET'S GO
TO THE CURSED HOUSE
**[08:30] ---**
and then take this one!
**[08:33] ---**
Okarun, you really suck
at playing Old Maid!
**[08:35] ---**
You guys just have demented personalities!
**[08:38] ---**
Maybe you're naïve? Yeah, naïve!
**[08:40] ---**
A naïve Okarun? Priceless!
**[08:42] ---**
I won't play anymore!
**[08:44] ---**
Sheesh, that was just a joke.
We're kidding!
**[08:47] ---**
Okarun! I'll give you some candy!
So cheer up!
**[08:51] ---**
Wow, these are so nostalgic.
I love these!
**[08:54] ---**
I bought a ton so you should
eat some too, Momo!
**[08:58] ---**
By the way, I was really impressed that
the candy shop over there still exists!
**[09:01] ---**
That grandma running the shop
never changes!
**[09:04] ---**
She still did the, "Here you go.
Your change is 500,000 yen," bit.
**[09:08] ---**
I was so touched
like Creamy Mami, woo!
**[09:11] ---**
*I hate having thoughts like this.*
**[09:15] ---**
*I get fed up
with my own shortcomings.*
**[09:19] ---**
*But I can't do anything about this feeling.*
**[09:23] ---**
*I have to take my mind off of it somehow.*
**[09:25] ---**
*I have to concentrate
on getting my nut back!*
**[09:30] ---**
*Nut... Nut... Nut...*
**[09:34] ---**
*Nut...*
**[09:35] ---**
*Nut, nut, nut, nut, nut...*
**[09:37] ---**
*Nut, nut, nut, nut, nut, nut...*
**[09:40] ---**
Okarun, what's wrong?
**[09:40] ---**
My nut!
**[09:43] ---**
Okarun, you're thinking about
your nut too much.
**[09:45] ---**
No, that's not it! This is...
**[09:47] ---**
Hey, I've been wondering
for a while now.
**[09:50] ---**
Since when have dirty jokes
been the new thing?
**[09:52] ---**
Oh no, that's not it.
There's a lot of things going on.
**[09:56] ---**
Then I'll make
something else get popular.
**[09:58] ---**
Hip joint!
**[10:00] ---**
No. Dirty jokes are not in.
**[10:02] ---**
Vamo lá!
**[10:03] ---**
That's Kazu's thing.
**[10:05] ---**
*Pathetic! You're so pathetic, Ken!*
**[10:08] ---**
*But at this rate,
my own heart won't last!*
**[10:12] ---**
*I must take initiative
in grasping Miss Ayase's interests.*
**[10:18] ---**
I will now talk about tsuchinokos!
**[10:22] ---**
Whoa now!
**[10:24] ---**
Tsuchinoko? I wanna hear!
**[10:26] ---**
UMAs are not creatures of fantasy!
**[10:28] ---**
Actually, even gorillas were UMAs
until about a hundred years ago!
**[10:32] ---**
And I believe that a tsuchinoko will be
the next UMA to follow in the footsteps of gorillas!
***SIGN*** SPECIAL FEATURE THE TRUTH ABOUT THE TSUCHINOKO
***SIGN*** BECOME POPULAR WITH HIGH DIMENSIONAL POWERS
**[10:37] ---**
Oh yeah, our village has
a legend of a great serpent.
**[10:40] ---**
A shrine that's said to have 200 years
of history and worships a great snake.
**[10:44] ---**
It's called Tsuchinoko Shrine!
**[10:47] ---**
Wow!
**[10:48] ---**
Let's go to that shrine! I want to see
a giant tsuchinoko snake!
**[10:51] ---**
Sheesh, you're so hopeless.
Stay close to me at all times, okay?
**[10:55] ---**
*Crap! The initiative!*
**[10:57] ---**
A mummified kappa!
**[10:59] ---**
There's a shrine that worships that, too.
**[11:01] ---**
So shrines that worship UMAs
are not that uncommon.
**[11:05] ---**
*How's that? I'll toss that UMA shrine legend
right back at ya!*
***SIGN*** GIANT MAN-EATING WORM DEEP DIVE!! WHERE SUBTERRANEANS GATHER!
**[11:08] ---**
Seriously? Isn't that totally wicked?
**[11:11] ---**
That means kappas exist!
**[11:13] ---**
Wait, hold on, then what about Nessie?
**[11:15] ---**
They have a photo and everything!
**[11:17] ---**
I personally think they exist!
Because I want to see them!
**[11:19] ---**
The photograph of Nessie
is called the Surgeon's Photograph.
**[11:21] ---**
They have since determined it to be a fake,
but I saw one recently with my own eyes!
**[11:25] ---**
Seriously? I wanna see one, too!
**[11:27] ---**
*Huh? Come to think,
this is the first time*
**[11:28] ---**
So they really do exist!
**[11:30] ---**
*that I've talked this much to someone
other than Miss Ayase.*
**[11:31] ---**
More like, I've never been able
to talk about stuff like this.
**[11:33] ---**
*This is fun!*
**[11:33] ---**
This is fun!
**[11:35] ---**
Okarun, you're amazing!
You know everything!
**[11:38] ---**
I totally respect you as a friend!
**[11:41] ---**
F-Friend.
**[11:43] ---**
Huh? We're not?
**[11:44] ---**
I'm totally shocked, and absorbed.
**[11:47] ---**
You're one of Momo's friends, right?
**[11:49] ---**
Then can you make me
one of your friends, too?
**[11:53] ---**
Sorry, I am an awkward fellow
after all.
**[11:57] ---**
I told you to not say that!
**[11:59] ---**
Huh? What's up? Why?
**[12:00] ---**
You don't have to know, Jiji!
**[12:03] ---**
Even Momo is leaving me out
of the loop, too!
**[12:05] ---**
*Why isn't he more despicable?
If he's such a good guy,*
**[12:11] ---**
*then I...*
**[12:18] ---**
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
**[12:20] ---**
This is a hot springs district!
**[12:23] ---**
It's in relation to my dad's work...
**[12:25] ---**
Wasn't your dad a teacher or something?
**[12:28] ---**
He's doing research on volcanoes
at a nearby college.
**[12:31] ---**
And that's why we all moved here, too.
***SIGN*** MANJU HOT SPRINGS MANJU
**[12:34] ---**
A volcano? Is it okay?
Not gonna erupt or anything?
***SIGN*** TARGET PRACTICE AMUSEMENT CENTER
**[12:37] ---**
There are records that it erupted
about 200 years ago.
**[12:42] ---**
But it seems to have calmed down since.
**[12:44] ---**
I see.
**[12:51] ---**
Slurp-a-durp!
**[12:53] ---**
Are we gonna...
**[12:55] ---**
I don't wanna hear it.
**[12:56] ---**
Hurray!
**[13:16] ---**
Slurp-a-durp!
**[13:19] ---**
Hurray!
**[13:33] ---**
This way now!
**[13:39] ---**
How is it, Momo?
Do you see a weird aura or anything?
**[13:42] ---**
Just how much stamina do you have?
**[13:49] ---**
I don't see anything at all.
**[13:52] ---**
Like, it's totally ordinary.
**[13:53] ---**
For real?
**[13:55] ---**
All the spirit mediums said
it was totally bad news!
**[13:58] ---**
More like I want to get
some rest first. I'm thirsty.
**[14:01] ---**
Wait, you really can't see anything?
**[14:03] ---**
Really? For real?
**[14:04] ---**
Really, for real.
**[14:05] ---**
H-Hold on, Miss Ayase.
**[14:10] ---**
Okarun, hurry on over!
**[14:12] ---**
Oh, okay.
**[14:25] ---**
How is it, Miss Ayase?
**[14:27] ---**
Do you see any weird auras or something?
**[14:35] ---**
*How is it?*
**[14:36] ---**
The TV turned on by itself!
**[14:38] ---**
That was me.
**[14:40] ---**
Oh, that scared me!
**[14:41] ---**
Why did you suddenly turn on the TV?
**[14:44] ---**
Because I'm bored.
**[14:46] ---**
There's nothing here.
**[14:49] ---**
*And that's it for us!
Back to the studio!*
**[14:53] ---**
Huh? Are you doubting me?
**[14:56] ---**
That's not it.
**[14:57] ---**
When spirit mediums came by,
they said this place was bad news, right?
**[15:01] ---**
This is my prediction, but maybe
those ghosts are hiding right now.
**[15:05] ---**
It was like this
back with Turbo Granny, too.
**[15:08] ---**
When the spirit's power is weak,
it's hard for me to notice them.
**[15:11] ---**
So it's easy for them to go into hiding.
**[15:14] ---**
In other words...
**[15:16] ---**
This'll be a piece of cake, yeah?
**[15:17] ---**
How awesome!
**[15:19] ---**
Lady Momo! Allow me
to massage your shoulders!
**[15:21] ---**
Hey!
**[15:24] ---**
I have no objections.
**[15:26] ---**
Oh, I want to drink some juice.
A sweet one!
**[15:31] ---**
I will get some ready right away!
**[15:33] ---**
Touched... Shoulder...
**[15:36] ---**
Let's get some rest for now.
**[15:39] ---**
Okarun, you should sit too.
**[15:45] ---**
Spirits are gonna show up at night anyway,
so let's rest when we can.
**[15:55] ---**
Okay.
**[15:56] ---**
And so, I'm gonna head out
into the hot springs district!
**[15:58] ---**
Huh?
**[16:00] ---**
Did you just say there were no spirits
because you wanted to go to the hot springs?
**[16:04] ---**
That's not true! There really aren't any!
**[16:07] ---**
Anyway, please have fun with Jiji, okay?
**[16:09] ---**
Huh? You're really gonna go?
**[16:11] ---**
What are we gonna do
if a spirit shows up?
**[16:14] ---**
It's fine! I'll be back by evening!
**[16:18] ---**
I'm heading out!
**[16:19] ---**
- Hurray!
- Wait, Miss Ayase!
**[16:21] ---**
Hurray!
**[16:22] ---**
Lady Momo! I have brought you
your sweet juice.
**[16:25] ---**
Huh?
**[16:27] ---**
Miss Ayase went to the hot springs district.
**[16:29] ---**
Seriously? I wanted to go with her!
**[16:37] ---**
Wanna play soccer?
**[16:41] ---**
You trap it, then...
**[16:42] ---**
Yup, that's it!
**[16:43] ---**
You're good!
**[16:44] ---**
Now try kicking it my way!
**[16:46] ---**
Get your pivot foot next to the ball, and
kick it here with the inside of your foot!
**[16:51] ---**
Oh, I'm sorry!
**[16:53] ---**
It's okay!
**[16:54] ---**
Here!
**[16:56] ---**
Sorry about that!
**[16:58] ---**
*I'm so pathetic.*
**[16:59] ---**
*I'm glad Miss Ayase isn't here!*
**[17:02] ---**
*But if I practice here,*
**[17:04] ---**
*I might be able to show Miss Ayase
when the time is right!*
**[17:06] ---**
*Oh, that's amazing, Okarun!
You're so cool!*
**[17:11] ---**
Hey, hey, Okarun!
**[17:13] ---**
Oh, sorry.
**[17:15] ---**
You in love with Momo?
**[17:19] ---**
Huh?
**[17:22] ---**
*I hope they're getting along.*
**[17:26] ---**
*It's a first guy friend for Okarun,
so I'm sure I'd just get in the way.*
**[17:31] ---**
Good for you, Okarun.
**[17:36] ---**
I mean, Momo is cute.
**[17:38] ---**
- For me, Miss Ayase was my first friend.
- Hey, pass!
**[17:41] ---**
I respect her, and she's very dear to me!
**[17:45] ---**
Nice pass!
**[17:46] ---**
I see, someone dear to you.
Someone you respect.
**[17:52] ---**
I really love Momo's face
and personality.
**[17:58] ---**
I do as well!
**[18:00] ---**
Huh?
**[18:01] ---**
You just said respect!
**[18:03] ---**
It's respect on top of all that!
**[18:05] ---**
Isn't that a bit unfair?
**[18:07] ---**
Then I'll add how I love
Momo's eyes! There, I win!
**[18:10] ---**
Wha...
**[18:10] ---**
Then I'll say all that, plus I love her mouth!
**[18:13] ---**
There! I win!
**[18:14] ---**
Nope, no good! That's no good!
**[18:16] ---**
You can't say "no good"!
**[18:18] ---**
I first started off saying I like her face,
so yours doesn't count!
**[18:21] ---**
Then your love of her eyes
won't count either!
**[18:24] ---**
It's fine!
**[18:25] ---**
I'm Momo's childhood friend!
**[18:28] ---**
There, I win!
**[18:29] ---**
Grrrr!
**[18:34] ---**
Win...
**[18:35] ---**
Huh? In what?
**[18:36] ---**
You can't just say
you win outta nowhere!
**[18:39] ---**
This is...
**[18:40] ---**
Right, I'm sorry.
**[18:41] ---**
What?
**[18:45] ---**
I'm starting to feel dizzy.
Time to head out.
**[18:51] ---**
It's too bad that it's an open-air bath,
but the walls are too high to see any scenery.
**[18:59] ---**
Oh, we already have someone here.
**[19:04] ---**
And she's quite a hottie!
**[19:11] ---**
What!?
**[19:13] ---**
You're so stubborn!
But I'll admit you've got some guts!
**[19:17] ---**
I'm not done yet! I haven't given up!
**[19:22] ---**
Hey, let's shake hands as friends!
**[19:26] ---**
Oh fine.
**[19:29] ---**
I got you now!
**[19:30] ---**
Damn you!
**[19:32] ---**
Miss Ayase would never be okay
with something this sneaky!
**[19:35] ---**
Admit defeat, Okarun!
**[19:38] ---**
No way! I'm not gonna give up!
**[19:40] ---**
Okarun!
**[19:43] ---**
Mr. Jiji, stop! Look at that!
**[19:50] ---**
Look at what?
**[19:51] ---**
That! Look!
**[19:54] ---**
Isn't it a bit strange there?
**[20:01] ---**
There wasn't a room
right next to the foyer, was there?
**[20:06] ---**
Young lady, you came
to a co-ed bath while being so young?
***SIGN*** MALE/FEMALE COMMUNAL USE WATCH YOUR FEET
**[20:11] ---**
There's no way I could read that!
**[20:13] ---**
Whew, so hot.
**[20:15] ---**
A beer would be nice right now!
**[20:17] ---**
Paradise!
**[20:19] ---**
I didn't notice at all, but you're right.
**[20:22] ---**
It was jutting out
when we look at it from the outside.
**[20:24] ---**
There should be something here.
**[20:30] ---**
It's hollow.
**[20:32] ---**
*Yikes. What should I do?*
**[20:34] ---**
*I want to get out right now,*
**[20:36] ---**
*but those guys are in the way
so it's hard to get out.*
**[20:38] ---**
*Oh no! I have to hurry out of here.*
**[20:40] ---**
*I'm starting to feel lightheaded!*
**[20:43] ---**
Let's try breaking it down.
**[20:44] ---**
Is it all right?
**[20:45] ---**
Probably not. We're renting the house,
but we gotta do it, right?
**[20:49] ---**
There has to be some reason...
**[20:52] ---**
A reason why my parents
ended up that way!
**[20:55] ---**
Young lady, do you know about gators?
**[20:58] ---**
Huh?
**[20:59] ---**
Gators? You mean those things
that look like lizards?
**[21:03] ---**
Nope, that's not it!
**[21:04] ---**
They're guys who often show up
in co-ed baths and target naked women.
**[21:16] ---**
*Can I deal with all of them
using my psychic powers?*
**[21:29] ---**
*I've heard that a pack of wolves disperse
as soon as you strike their leader.*
**[21:42] ---**
*Crap!*