# 5 - HAPPY and Beautiful
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] shi**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] masa**
--
***SIGN*** HAPPY and Beautiful
***SIGN***
Binan High School
**[01:42] kiri**
Isn't that funny?
**[01:47] kiri**
What's with the line?
**[01:49] shu**
Dunno.
**[01:52] shu**
Sleepy...
**[01:53] dogo**
Senpai, senpai, senpai, senpai!
**[01:55] dogo**
Good morning!
**[01:58] kiri**
The morning screamer has arrived.
**[02:01] ban**
Senpai. Good morning.
**[02:05] dogo**
What's all this?
**[02:07] wa**
Hey.
**[02:09] wa**
Ryoma-kun, these are for you.
**[02:11] kiri**
Cookies!
**[02:14] kiri**
Thank y—
**[02:16] kiri**
Y—
**[02:17] kiri**
Y—
**[02:18] dogo**
Nanao-senpai. You're teasing Ryoma-senpai again.
**[02:23] wak**
You really want them?
**[02:25] kiri**
I do!
**[02:26] wak**
Here you go, then.
**[02:28] kiri**
Hooray!
**[02:29] dogo**
But why do you have cookies?
**[02:31] wak**
They're handing them out up there,
so I picked up a pack.
***SIGN*** Maasa Sweets Festival
**[02:44] ma**
Here, a present for you!
**[02:46] ma**
Thank you so much!
**[02:51] ma**
For you, too.
**[02:52] ma**
Handmade cookies using
Maasa's special recipe!
**[02:56] ma**
Th-Thank you so much!
**[03:01] kiri**
Maasa Sweets Festival?
**[03:04] kiri**
You mean... these are...
**[03:05] man**
They're most likely...
**[03:06] man**
No, they're definitely cookies handmade
by Shirahone Maasa of the student council.
**[03:13] man**
But why a sweets festival?
**[03:16] shu**
Dunno. No interest in it.
**[03:20] shu**
Hey, Kyotaro...
**[03:23] mas**
* "Maasa Sweets Festival"*
* is just a lot of kidding.*
**[03:26] mas**
*It's really...*
**[03:28] mas**
Hey!
***SIGN*** Maasa Sweets Festival For lunch, too!
**[03:37] mas**
Don't worry, there's enough
here for everyone!
**[03:40] mas**
Go ahead and eat your fill!
**[03:43] mas**
You can have some, too.
***SIGN*** Sujikawa Honeo
**[03:47] suji**
Thank you very much.
**[03:49] mas**
I made a special cupcake just for you, too.
**[03:52] mas**
It's one of my special sweets,
packed with Echire butter imported from France.
**[03:58] mas**
Now, I'll top it with fresh cream...
**[04:02] stu**
Who is that guy?
**[04:03] stu**
That's Sujikawa.
**[04:04] stu**
The guy we call "chicken carcass."
**[04:06] stu**
Oh, chicken carcass.
**[04:09] masa**
Be quiet.
**[04:11] masa**
It's not nice to say that stuff.
**[04:14] suji**
*He defended me!*
**[04:16] suji**
Well, see you later, Sujikawa-kun.
**[04:18] suji**
R-Right...
**[04:20] suji**
Okay, now! Don't worry,
there's plenty for all you guys, too!
**[04:27] una**
Maasa... what's he thinking?
**[04:30] suji**
It's probably all full of sugar and fat...
**[04:31] ata**
Well, that explains it.
**[04:34] suji**
Surely, if I eat this...
**[04:38] stu**
Me too, me too, me too!
**[04:45] una**
Are you okay?
**[04:47] suji**
Y-Yes...
**[04:49] suji**
I'm sorry.
**[04:53] una**
They call him chicken carcass, but...
**[04:56] una**
He looks like all the stock's
been boiled out of him already.
**[05:01] fura**
Sniff, sniff, sniff...
**[05:03] fura**
I smell the stench of unhappiness again.
**[05:06] fura**
From that direction...
**[05:07] fura**
No... from this direction, too?
***SIGN*** Maasa Sweets Festival
**[05:15] shu**
You know about genetic testing?
**[05:17] dogo**
What about genetic testing?
**[05:18] kiri**
Kyotaro, where did that come from?
**[05:21] shu**
You think it's really accurate?
**[05:23] man**
Yeah. Genetic research has been
making great strides of late.
**[05:29] kiri**
What kinds of things can it tell us?
**[05:31] man**
Diseases you're prone to, facial structure,
**[05:34] man**
whether you're predisposed
to putting on weight or not...
**[05:37] man**
They can read all that
from your genetic makeup.
**[05:41] dogo**
Wow, wow, wow! I wanna try it!
**[05:44] man**
You'd better not.
**[05:45] dogo**
Why not?
**[05:47] waku**
If a child or young person
**[05:49] waku**
with a future still ahead of them is told
"you're genetically predisposed to stupidity,"
**[05:53] waku**
it might be demotivating.
**[05:56] waku**
Right, Ichiro-kun?
**[05:57] dogo**
That's true.
**[06:05] suji**
It all came back up again.
**[06:08] suji**
I guess my stomach is
sensitive to fresh cream.
**[06:11] man**
Hey, want to go to Maasa-san's
sweets buffet later on?
**[06:15] man**
Sure, sure!
**[06:16] man**
I can afford to pack on a few more pounds!
**[06:18] suji**
They're lucky to be so plump...
**[06:23] suji**
* I've never been able to put on weight,*
* even when I was little.*
**[06:27] suji**
* Hoping to gain a few pounds,*
* I even tried protein shakes...*
**[06:34] suji**
*but they disagreed with me and made me sick.*
**[06:36] ---**
My stomach...
**[06:39] suji**
* I tried stuffing myself*
* with various other foods,*
**[06:43] suji**
*but it ended the same way.*
**[06:45] suji**
* I just got sick and ended*
* up thinner than before.*
**[06:49] suji**
* Around that time, people*
* started calling me...*
**[06:54] suji**
* "Nothing but skin and bones left...*
* chicken carcass."*
***SIGN*** We use real chicken carcass!
**[06:59] sign**
* It must be my genes that keep*
* me from putting on weight.*
**[07:03] sign**
*There's no other way around it.*
**[07:06] kiri**
So if you're genetically predisposed to being fat,
dieting can't help you?
**[07:10] man**
Not necessarily... It's just what
your body will tend towards.
**[07:16] dogo**
Why? Why? Why?
**[07:17] man**
Near the end of the Ice Age,
**[07:19] man**
it's said that most of the Northern
Hemisphere was covered in ice.
**[07:23] dogo**
And? And?
**[07:25] man**
There's a theory that this harsh environment
led to the evolution of a conservation gene
**[07:29] man**
that let humans store more energy
from the food they consumed.
**[07:31] man**
Those who inherited that gene are
more inclined towards obesity today.
**[07:38] kiri**
So it's my genes' fault that I like sweets?
**[07:42] wak**
You'd better be careful, Ryoma-kun.
**[07:44] kiri**
Yeah, I'd seriously better!
**[07:46] dogo**
For real, for real, for real!
**[07:47] dogo**
Me, too!
**[07:48] wak**
I wonder where the genes that make you
such a loudmouth come from, Ichiro.
**[07:54] dogo**
Nanao-senpai! Are you interested in my genes?
**[07:58] waku**
Not a bit.
**[07:59] karl**
No worries here.
**[08:01] karl**
There was no Ice Age in Honyala Land.
**[08:04] shu**
I'm starting to think it's better
not to know about your genes.
**[08:14] mas**
Gosh, today made me so tired.
***SIGN*** Maasa's Fatten Up
Pigs Recipe
**[08:19] mas**
The Maasa Sweets Festival was a big lie.
**[08:22] sign**
It's actually the Maasa "Fatten Up,
You Pigs" Festival.
**[08:28] masa**
They didn't contain Echire butter,
but weight-gain butter!
**[08:31] masa**
Now, you pigs...
**[08:33] masa**
Get fat, all of you!
**[08:38] masa**
How long have you been there?
**[08:40] fura**
A while? Well... it's hard to say.
**[08:46] una**
Sounds like your sweets festival
was a roaring success.
**[08:50] masa**
I-It was, thank you...
**[08:53] masa**
I still have a few left,
so I'll go hand those out...
**[09:18] dogo**
Hey, hey, hey!
**[09:19] dogo**
Wait up!
**[09:22] dogo**
You worked really hard on your diet, huh?
**[09:26] dogo**
I honestly didn't recognize you.
**[09:28] dogo**
Since you changed your name to "Maasa," too...
**[09:32] dogo**
I heard you'd gone on a
foreign exchange trip, but...
**[09:43] dogo**
I never thought we'd end
up at the same high school.
**[09:48] masa**
Shut up!
**[09:50] masa**
I don't know you.
**[09:57] kiri**
So those two know each other, huh?
**[10:01] man**
I hear they're cousins.
**[10:03] man**
They went to the same school until
summer break of their sixth year,
**[10:05] man**
when he went to study abroad.
**[10:09] kiri**
But if Ichiro's his cousin
and he's avoiding him...
**[10:12] kiri**
I wonder what happened?
**[10:13] waku**
Maybe he has a secret
he doesn't want anyone to know.
**[10:17] waku**
Secret?
**[10:20] shu**
No interest here.
**[10:21] shu**
Actually, I'm hungry.
**[10:23] kiri**
Want to get something to eat, then?
**[10:25] dogo**
Hey, senpais! Are we getting food?
**[10:28] dogo**
Let's go, let's go!
**[10:34] masa**
Stupid Ichiro...
**[10:41] (Flashback) masa**
Shirahone, you're really something.
**[10:44] (Flashback) masa**
Yeah, no kidding!
**[10:45] (Flashback) masa**
I couldn't do what you do.
***SIGN*** School Play Bunbuku Chagama
**[10:48] (Flashback) kid**
Shirahone'd be perfect, because he's fat!
**[10:51] (Flashback) kid**
And he's got that old-fashioned
name, Magozaemon!
**[10:53] (Flashback) kid**
He's perfect for Bunbuku Chagama!
***SIGN*** Playing Bunbuku Chagama: Shirahone Magozaemon
**[10:57] (Flashback) ichi**
Wow, wow, wow!
**[10:59] (Flashback) ichi**
You got the lead role!
**[11:04] masa**
No, no!
**[11:05] masa**
I'm not that person!
**[11:07] masa**
After making my cutie-pie debut...
**[11:10] masa**
It makes me so annoyed!
**[11:15] masa**
I ate one!
**[11:16] masa**
After I held off on carbs
for four whole years!
**[11:20] masa**
You stupid things!
**[11:29] suji**
I forced myself to eat,
but it all came right back up again...
**[11:35] suji**
You're...
**[11:39] masa**
So you were throwing up the cookies
I worked so hard on, were you?
**[11:44] suji**
S-Sorry...
**[11:45] suji**
I've always had a weak stomach,
and I can't put on weight because of it...
**[11:49] masa**
If you can't put on weight...
then you might as well become a monster!
**[11:54] shi**
Maasa's right.
**[11:55] una**
Yeah.
**[11:57] masa**
Ibusuki-senpai...
**[11:58] masa**
Unazuki-senpai...
**[12:01] shi**
I understand your suffering.
**[12:03] shi**
The people of this world
**[12:05] shi**
envy those who represent the opposite
of what they fear for themselves,
**[12:08] shi**
so they criticize and attack them.
**[12:11] shi**
Wouldn't you like to correct those people?
**[12:18] shi**
We are the Furanui Knights...
**[12:20] shi**
Edelstein!
**[12:23] shi**
Druck!
**[12:24] shi**
Mich!
**[12:25] shi**
Hart!
**[12:27] shi**
An!
***SIGN*** Dogo Ichiro Born August 8th Blood Type: O Leo Hobbies: Card games Likes: Ichiro tarts, fun
**[12:56] shu**
Delicious.
**[12:57] dogo**
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
**[12:59] dogo**
After a hot bath you just
gotta have ramen, huh?
**[13:02] kiri**
It's "after a night of drinking, you
have to finish with ramen," right?
**[13:05] kiri**
Of course, I don't drink,
so I wouldn't know...
**[13:09] kiri**
I wonder why old men want
to eat ramen after drinking.
**[13:14] kiri**
When one imbibes alcohol, sugars are needed
to break down the alcohol in the bloodstream.
**[13:20] kiri**
Thus, blood sugar levels drop, which leads
to additional cravings for carbohydrates.
**[13:26] waku**
Well, ramen soup is full of salt and fat,
and the noodles are basically a carb bomb...
**[13:32] dogo**
I see!
**[13:34] dogo**
So we're getting nutrition from
those chicken carcasses, huh?
**[13:42] shu**
Did you hear something?
**[13:45] kiri**
I think so...
**[13:48] mon**
You people...
**[13:49] mon**
No matter how much I eat,
the nutrition is snatched away...
**[13:53] mon**
Can you understand how I feel, squawk?!
**[13:56] mon**
Squawk, squawk, squawkity-squawk!
**[13:58] ichi**
He's saying something.
**[14:00] kiri**
Another pain in the butt...
**[14:04] shu**
Eating makes me sleepy.
**[14:06] man**
That's because consuming carbs
increases your blood sugar.
**[14:10] man**
Then, to lower your blood sugar,
insulin is secreted,
**[14:14] man**
which causes a decrease in the
glucose needed for brain functions,
**[14:18] man**
which makes you sleepy.
**[14:24] gara**
Hey, you guys! Get out here, squawk!
**[14:28] dogo**
I think that chicken
carcass is calling us out.
**[14:31] dogo**
What should we do?
**[14:32] dogo**
Just ignore him.
**[14:34] dogo**
Thought so.
**[14:34] mon**
You people...
**[14:36] mon**
If you won't acknowledge my suffering...
**[14:40] mon**
I'll have to do this, squawk!
**[14:46] kiri**
What is he doing?
**[14:47] man**
Trying to stir up the wind
with his wings, I think...
**[14:51] man**
Too bad he's a chicken carcass.
**[14:52] dogo**
I feel a little bad for him.
**[14:55] dogo**
What should we do?
**[14:56] dogo**
Can't we just leave him be?
**[14:59] karl**
He's in the depths of anger and suffering!
**[15:03] karl**
We need to make him happy!
**[15:07] dogo**
Great, now Karls is here...
**[15:10] dogo**
I bet he's gonna make us do it again.
**[15:12] karl**
That's right!
**[15:25] karl**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[16:01] karl**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[16:15] karl**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[16:28] karl**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[16:41] karl**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[16:54] karl**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[16:59] karl**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[17:02] karl**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[17:04] karl**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[17:07] karl**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[17:09] karl**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[17:12] karl**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[17:16] karl**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[17:21] mon**
Hey!
**[17:22] mon**
Everything I eat just
gets boiled off as broth!
**[17:26] mon**
Because of that, I can't put on any weight!
**[17:30] mon**
I'm going to share that pain with you!
**[17:34] mon**
Chicken Carcass Broth Beam!
**[17:46] dogo**
Wow, this broth is delicious.
**[17:49] dogo**
Let me try.
**[17:51] dogo**
Yeah, what delicious broth!
**[17:53] mon**
Stop mocking me!
**[17:56] mon**
It's time to get serious!
**[17:58] mon**
Chicken Carcass Paitan Splash!
**[18:02] shu**
Soup made from chicken carcass
is very nutritious, isn't it?
**[18:06] mon**
Yes, squawk!
**[18:08] mon**
That's why people guzzle
down my broth, squawk!
**[18:11] mon**
It's also very delicious, squawk!
**[18:13] shu**
Why not be proud, then?
**[18:15] shu**
That's a sign that you're healthy.
**[18:18] mon**
W-Well...
**[18:20] shu**
In this world, there are people who
stress because they can't gain weight,
**[18:23] shu**
and people who stress
because they can't lose it.
**[18:27] shu**
Well, everyone stresses over a lot of things.
**[18:31] mon**
Th-They do?
**[18:32] shu**
Well, as long as you're healthy and can
enjoy a nice nap, you're all right in my book.
**[18:40] karl**
Now, everyone!
**[18:41] kiri**
Come on, Kyotaro. Hurry up.
**[18:46] kyo**
Let's get this over with.
**[18:49] kyo**
Use your powers combined to make him happy!
**[18:52] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:53] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:54] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:55] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:56] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:57] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:57] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:58] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:59] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[19:00] kyo**
Yes!
**[19:01] kyo**
Let's happy hour!
**[19:04] kyo**
Happy and Set!
**[19:18] kyo**
Return to happiness!
**[19:20] kyo**
Happy and Turn!
**[19:30] mon**
Squawk in the park...
**[19:38] mon**
Happy End!
**[19:40] mon**
Happy Powder!
**[19:46] suji**
What? What was I doing just now?
**[19:50] man**
That's the first year,
Sujikawa Honeo, isn't it?
**[19:52] dogo**
Yeah, he's so skinny people
call him chicken carcass...
**[19:57] suji**
Y-Yes.
**[19:58] suji**
But I always ace my physicals.
**[20:01] suji**
I'm the peak of health.
**[20:04] suji**
And even though I'm thin, I'm quite strong.
**[20:12] suji**
S-See?
**[20:14] dogo**
Hey, don't push yourself, too!
**[20:17] suji**
Excuse me.
**[20:21] karl**
Looks like everyone's happy again today!
**[20:24] karl**
Happy, happy!
**[20:28] una**
Now, now.
**[20:29] una**
There'll be other chances.
**[20:35] una**
That's right, Maasa. We haven't
tried your Maasa cookies yet.
**[20:42] una**
You won't give us any?
**[20:43] masa**
Well... I'm sorry about that.
**[20:49] masa**
The truth is... I was hiding something.
**[20:54] ata**
We'll catch it next time, then.
**[20:56] ata**
The Maasa "Fatten Up, You Pigs" Festival.
**[21:00] una**
Next time, I hope you'll put
in even more weight-gain butter
**[21:03] una**
to make everyone even fatter.
**[21:08] una**
And you'll still be you, Maasa.
**[21:12] una**
That's right. Let's go, Maasa.
**[21:21] shu**
I'm exhausted.
**[21:23] shu**
Just beat.
**[21:23] kiri**
Isn't this the second time
we've been here today?
**[21:26] man**
We really worked up a sweat
against that monster.
**[21:29] dogo**
It's best to have a bath after a fight!
**[21:32] waku**
But what was his secret in the end?
**[21:38] dogo**
Whose secret?
**[21:39] waku**
Shirahone Maasa.
**[21:40] waku**
He's your cousin, isn't he?
**[21:42] dogo**
Yeah, he is!
**[21:44] dogo**
But I couldn't think of what
secret he could possibly have,
**[21:48] dogo**
so I brought this...
**[21:49] waku**
Your elementary school album?
**[21:53] dogo**
Here!
**[21:56] kiri**
He looks totally different!
**[21:57] kiri**
Almost unrecognizable...
**[22:01] man**
And his name...
**[22:03] man**
Magozaemon?
**[22:11] masa**
Bye-bye, Magozaemon!
**[22:18] masa**
I'm Shirahone Maasa!
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** HAPPY Identity
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Identity"!
***SIGN*** All of a sudden, it's the rainy season! Good thing we don't have anything that can get moldy this year, huh?
***SIGN*** Some actually theorize that the word for "rainy season" originally meant "moldy season." (-Manza)
***SIGN***