# Cute High Earth Defense Club LOVE!
The story revolves around the members of the “Earth Defense Club” aka the “Do Nothing Club” at Binan High School. One day, the club members are soaking in a hot bath together when all of a sudden a mysterious pink wombat appears out of thin air! The wombat asks the members to lend it their help to protect the Earth. At school the next day, each of the club members receives a magical bracelet enveloping them in a dazzling light.
# Season 1
# 1 - In the Name of Love
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[00:14] atsushi**
Ah, it's great being first in the bath.
**[00:16] en**
Atsushi, you know, there's something
I've been thinking about lately.
**[00:21] atsushi**
What is it, En-chan?
The tax increase? The Olympics?
**[00:24] en**
No, chikuwabu.
**[00:26] atsushi**
Chikuwabu?
**[00:27] en**
He's a real mystery, you know?
**[00:30] atsushi**
It's just chikuwabu...
**[00:33] en**
Not quite chikuwa, not quite fu.
**[00:35] en**
He doesn't exist outside of oden.
**[00:37] en**
Why is he even alive?
**[00:39] atsu**
Well, it's not alive...
**[00:40] en**
He's excluded from both the paste products
group and the wheat gluten group.
**[00:45] en**
When I think about how he must feel,
it's kind of depressing.
**[00:48] atsu**
But there are people who like chikuwabu.
**[00:51] en**
Oh? You like chikuwabu?
**[00:53] en**
Gonna start a club? A chikuwabu-bu?
**[00:55] atsu**
What? Chikuwabu-bu is too hard to say.
**[00:58] en**
It's the wabu-bu who plot
to dominate via chikuwabu.
**[01:01] atsu**
You're abbreviating it...
**[01:03] en**
Daikon radish and tofu fritters
contribute to the diversity that is oden
**[01:08] en**
by creating a savory flavor.
**[01:11] en**
Yet chikuwabu only absorbs that savoriness,
**[01:14] en**
offering nothing of its own.
**[01:15] atsu**
Couldn't you say the same of konjac?
**[01:17] en**
No, konjac is at least flexible.
**[01:21] en**
It's broad-minded enough to absorb that
savoriness into its deepest parts.
**[01:25] en**
Yet, with chikuwabu, you can
boil it for hours and hours,
**[01:28] en**
and most of it will remain nothing
but wheat flour mixed with water.
**[01:33] en**
It gives off the superficial appearance
of melting and integrating itself while,
**[01:38] en**
deep down, it rejects others and
denies its wheat-based origins.
**[01:41] atsu**
Uh, En-chan, do you hate chikuwabu?
**[01:44] en**
I don't know if I hate it.
**[01:45] en**
I just feel like I'm looking at an unknown lifeform.
**[01:48] atsu**
But it's not a lifeform...
**[01:55] wombat**
Where might this be?
**[01:59] atsu**
A public bath... Why do you ask?
**[02:01] wombat**
What is a pub-lic-bath?
**[02:03] atsu**
It's a place where you pay money
to sit in heated water,
**[02:06] atsu**
to maintain bodily hygiene and relax the mind.
**[02:10] wombat**
Relax the mind!
**[02:12] wombat**
The people of this planet have an even
more refined civilization than I thought!
**[02:19] wombat**
How I should like to protect this planet...
**[02:22] ---**
R-Right...
**[02:23] wombat**
Would you mind helping me?
**[02:27] wombat**
Please!
**[02:30] wombat**
Um... I'd just like...
**[02:32] wombat**
to talk...
**[02:36] en**
H-Hey! It stinks! It hurts!
The fur's pricking me!
**[02:39] atsu**
What is this thing? A bear? A dog? A pig?
**[02:41] yumoto**
Sirs! Please, no wrestling in the bath!
**[02:46] yumoto**
A wombat!
**[02:51] yumoto**
Diprotodontia Macropodidae!
**[02:52] yumoto**
Cousin to the koala!
**[02:54] yumoto**
They get sick if they get lonely
and have flat noses!
**[02:57] ---**
There, there! Don't struggle!
**[03:00] wombat**
Help me!
**[03:05] en**
That kid is something else.
**[03:07] en**
Most people would run at the
sight of a creature like that.
**[03:09] en**
And a pink one, no less.
**[03:11] atsu**
He's a first year at our school.
Hakone Yumoto, I think.
**[03:21] atsu**
Heading home now?
**[03:24] en**
The student council must have it rough.
**[03:27] yuuma**
And you must have it easy.
**[03:30] en**
In oden terms, they're daikon radish,
egg, and mochi-stuffed tofu.
**[03:35] atsu**
Is that a compliment?
**[03:36] en**
A serious compliment.
That's the golden trio, you know?
**[03:39] atsu**
No konjac, huh?
**[03:42] yumoto**
Wait for me!
**[03:45] atsu**
So what is he? In oden terms.
**[03:48] en**
The pot, maybe?
**[03:49] atsu**
That's not food...
**[03:51] wombat**
Help!
**[03:53] yumoto**
Wait, I said!
***SIGN*** In the Name of Love
***SIGN*** Binan High School
**[04:10] chiku**
*My name is Chiku Kazutake.*
***SIGN*** Chiku Kazutake
**[04:13] chiku**
*I'm a student at Binan High School.*
**[04:16] chiku**
* I have no strong subjects.*
* No weak subjects, either.*
**[04:19] chiku**
* I'm a member of the Biology Club,*
* but I never actually attend.*
**[04:23] chiku**
* My theory is that humans can be*
* divided into three categories... I think.*
**[04:28] man**
The beautiful Nozomi invited us to a mixer.
**[04:31] man**
Sorry, my schedule's full already.
**[04:33] chiku**
* The beautiful, the ugly...*
* and those who are neither.*
**[04:38] man**
I'm going to be participating
in the Math Olympics.
**[04:41] man**
I'm in the New Year's poetry reading!
**[04:43] chiku**
* The smart, the stupid...*
* and those who are neither.*
**[04:48] man**
Ten more laps!
**[04:49] man**
Okay! C'mon!
**[04:51] chiku**
* The athletic, the frail...*
* and those who are neither.*
**[04:57] man**
What?
**[04:58] man**
I bumped into something.
**[05:01] chiku**
*I'm... the third kind.*
***SIGN*** Class 3-C
**[05:19] atsu**
Stand!
**[05:23] student**
Is that a pet?
**[05:23] student**
A stuffed animal?
**[05:24] student**
Isn't it huge?
**[05:25] student**
It's giant!
**[05:25] student**
Why'd he bring an animal here?
**[05:27] student**
Hey, you think Tawarayama's
finally... you know?
**[05:29] student**
That, huh?
**[05:31] student**
Finally losing his marbles?
**[05:34] atsu**
Bow.
**[05:36] atsu**
Take your seats.
**[05:38] wombat**
You boys are...
**[05:41] student**
Did that voice come from the animal?
**[05:43] student**
That wasn't Tawarayama's voice.
**[05:45] tamura**
No. It is nothing.
**[05:47] tamura**
We shall begin class now.
**[05:51] student**
"Shall"?
**[05:52] student**
"Shall"?
**[05:54] atsu**
En-chan...
**[05:55] en**
I've got a bad feeling about this.
**[06:00] tamura**
Ah, begging your pardon, you two.
**[06:03] tamura**
No, please, wait for me!
**[06:06] wombat**
Won't you please hear me out?
**[06:09] atsu**
Yeah, he's talking.
**[06:10] wombat**
Oh, forgive me.
**[06:11] wombat**
Circumstances demand that
I draw attention away from myself,
**[06:15] wombat**
so I would appreciate it if you would act
as if you're speaking to this individual.
**[06:19] atsu**
Little late for that!
**[06:20] wombat**
But to meet you two again
like this must be destiny!
**[06:24] en**
No, destiny has nothing to do with it.
**[06:25] wombat**
Please come with me!
**[06:26] en**
Pass.
**[06:27] wombat**
Do you mean "pass" as in "approved"?
**[06:29] atsu**
Is that some old con man trick?
**[06:31] en**
On Earth, it means "I refuse."
**[06:33] wombat**
Wonderful!
**[06:35] wombat**
Please, teach me everything there is
to know about Earth culture and customs!
**[06:39] atsu**
Too much responsibility!
**[06:40] en**
Why don't you ask Mr. Tawarayama?
**[06:42] wombat**
Oh, no, you see, this individual has some
difficulties with mobility and endurance...
**[06:46] en**
That seemed vaguely insulting.
**[06:47] atsu**
Wasn't he turning 77 this year?
**[06:49] en**
No, that's not what I'm talking about.
**[06:50] wombat**
Setting that aside, I want us to protect this
lovable Earth with the power of love together!
**[06:56] wombat**
Why, you ask? I do it all for love!
**[06:59] en**
No, we didn't ask.
**[07:00] atsu**
Sorry, but we have other things to do.
**[07:01] en**
That's right! I need to meditate
on the matter of chikuwabu!
**[07:05] wombat**
Chikuwabu? What's that?
**[07:07] en**
It's a thing that exists, yet does not exist!
Like a symbol of uncertainty!
**[07:11] en**
I'm trying to figure out the purpose
of chikuwabu's existence!
**[07:17] chiku**
Chikuwabu's... purpose?
**[07:22] yumoto**
So this is where you were!
**[07:24] yumoto**
What, are you trying to be
Mr. Tawarayama's pet?
**[07:27] yumoto**
Using him as your hands?
Going undercover? Want a rice ball?
**[07:30] wombat**
Pardon me, but would you mind
saving me from that threat?
**[07:34] en**
Why?
**[07:35] wombat**
I realize that he presents no hatred
or malice, but instincts dictate...
**[07:39] yumoto**
I won't let you run again!
**[07:41] wombat**
I'll die if he gets near me!
**[07:43] yumoto**
Why? Why? I read on the net
that wombats love rice balls!
**[07:47] yumoto**
I wanna cuddle you!
**[07:48] wombat**
Pass!
**[07:50] yumoto**
That means "approved," right?
**[07:53] atsu**
Are you okay?
**[07:55] chiku**
Yes...
**[07:57] atsu**
I don't know whether to call it
a question or an opinion, but...
**[08:00] atsu**
Those two really aren't on the
same wavelength, are they?
**[08:03] en**
Not a bit.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[08:07] ryuu**
Yo.
**[08:08] io**
Good day, Senpai.
**[08:10] atsu**
Io. How are you doing today?
**[08:12] io**
Feeling like I just dropped a
lump of butter into boiling oil.
**[08:15] atsu**
And you, Ryuu?
**[08:16] ryuu**
Just perfect, by certain standards.
**[08:18] io**
I melted off twenty million in twenty minutes.
**[08:21] ryuu**
I ended up triple-booked.
I'm really in trouble.
**[08:24] en**
You guys amaze me.
**[08:26] io**
Money is...
**[08:27] ryuu**
Women are...
**[08:28] both**
Life!
**[08:30] io**
Oh, speaking of which,
**[08:31] io**
I found this on the door.
***SIGN*** Urgent Please register your club officially. -Student Council
**[08:34] en**
A student council request for club registration?
**[08:37] atsu**
In other words, if we want to use the room,
we need to officially register as a club.
**[08:42] en**
What a pain.
**[08:43] ryuu**
That's why I keep telling you
**[08:45] ryuu**
we should be the Innocent Co-Ed Mingle Club!
**[08:47] atsu**
That violates public decency!
**[08:49] io**
Then what about the
Economics in Practice Club?
**[08:52] atsu**
It's lacking in high school student character!
**[08:54] atsu**
...is what the student council
president would say, I expect.
**[08:57] en**
Good point.
**[08:58] en**
Why not just make it the Earth Defense Club?
**[09:01] atsu**
Oh, that thing hanging on the door...
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[09:03] io**
The mystery sign that's been hanging
there since who knows when, right?
**[09:07] en**
Why not? This is a pain.
**[09:08] atsu**
We can't do that.
**[09:10] atsu**
We've been buying time by
saying we'll submit it soon,
**[09:13] atsu**
but this might be the limit.
**[09:14] io**
Clubs need at least five members.
**[09:16] ryuu**
We need an advisor, too.
**[09:21] atsu**
Mr. Tawarayama?!
**[09:23] ryuu**
Is he... dead?
**[09:31] en**
The aftermath?
***SIGN*** Hakone Yumoto
Born January 26th
Blood Type O / Aquarius
Hobby: Exercise
Likes: Animals, rice balls
**[09:53] chiku**
The purpose of chikuwabu...
**[09:56] chiku**
It has no purpose.
**[09:57] chiku**
Chikuwabu could disappear
and no one would care.
**[10:00] white**
*That's right. And you could disappear, too...*
**[10:13] yumoto**
This is bliss.
**[10:14] yumoto**
Cuddling really is great!
**[10:17] atsu**
Are you Hakone Yumoto?
**[10:19] yumoto**
Yeah! Thanks for always
usin' the Kurotama Bath!
**[10:22] yumoto**
Aren't animals awesome?
**[10:24] yumoto**
My cuddle battery's charged up
for the first time in forever!
**[10:29] en**
I think he really is dea—
**[10:31] atsu**
Don't say it.
**[10:36] en**
He came back to life?!
**[10:38] wombat**
After all this, I won't
ask any more of you boys!
**[10:40] wombat**
On the contrary, I'm going to
make you take responsibility!
**[10:44] atsu**
Responsibility?
**[10:45] ryuu**
For what?
**[10:46] yumoto**
He's saying we can cuddle
for the rest of our lives!
**[10:49] wombat**
It'll take too long to explain,
so I'll make it quick!
**[10:52] wombat**
Lovracelet!
**[10:58] yumoto**
What's this?
**[10:59] yumoto**
You're giving them to us?
"The Wombat Returns"?
**[11:02] wombat**
The Lovracelets are your love, given form!
**[11:05] yumoto**
Wombat's love given form?
**[11:08] en**
Wait, what the hell is "love given form"?
**[11:11] yumoto**
It buzzed!
**[11:12] ryu**
Are these defective?
**[11:14] io**
That's a problem. Should I contact the
manufacturer and earn us a quick buck?
**[11:17] atsu**
You're surprisingly unscrupulous.
**[11:20] wombat**
They are not defective!
**[11:23] wombat**
That's the Lovracelet's Love Alert!
**[11:25] wombat**
Let's go!
**[11:28] wombat**
It kindly lets you know immediately
**[11:30] wombat**
when the loveless are thinking loveless
thoughts and taking loveless actions!
**[11:35] atsu**
"Kindly" lets us know?
**[11:37] yumoto**
You're pretty smart for
someone so fuzzy, Wombat.
**[11:39] wombat**
Incidentally, I am not one of your
Earth mammals known as the wombat.
**[11:44] yumoto**
What?!
**[11:46] ryuu**
No, I think it's weirder that
you're surprised by that.
**[11:48] yumoto**
But he can speak our language!
**[11:50] io**
No, I think that just makes it weirder.
**[11:52] atsu**
And he's pink, at that.
**[11:54] wombat**
Don't worry about conversing.
**[11:56] wombat**
I have a high-performance
automatic translator.
**[11:59] io**
That's an amazing thing to just blurt out.
**[12:01] wombat**
My name is *$%@ and I come from &!@$.
**[12:04] atsu**
What? Say that again?
**[12:06] wombat**
I am ^%@*# and I come from $!*@#.
**[12:09] en**
Was it different that time?
**[12:10] wombat**
It's %*@#$%!
**[12:11] yumoto**
Oh, forget it! We can just go with
Wombat. Right, Wombat?
**[12:15] chikuwa**
What's your deal, man?
**[12:16] chikuwa**
Huh? Huh?
**[12:19] chikuwa**
You got a problem with me? Huh? Huh?
**[12:22] yumoto**
What's that thing?
**[12:24] ryuu**
Chikuwabu.
**[12:25] io**
You said it!
**[12:26] ryuu**
But it's clearly chikuwabu!
**[12:29] yumoto**
The Chikawabu Monster?
**[12:31] atsu**
You just casually named it.
**[12:32] en**
Aren't you going to cuddle it?
**[12:34] yumoto**
Nah, that's a little out of my range.
**[12:36] atsu**
You have a range?
**[12:38] yumoto**
What are you saying? Of course I do.
**[12:41] yumoto**
Doesn't it look a little sticky?
**[12:43] atsu**
Its surface does seem to be melting...
**[12:45] en**
It's a little gross for me, too.
**[12:47] ryuu**
Is it?
**[12:48] io**
Uh, I think the monster part is a bigger
problem than the chikuwabu part...
**[12:51] wombat**
That's right!
**[12:53] wombat**
Now, you must "Love Making"
into the Battle Lovers!
**[12:56] en**
Huh? Love Ma—
**[12:58] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[13:01] io**
What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
**[13:04] ryuu**
"Beloved Earth"?
**[13:06] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[13:09] io**
You, too?
**[13:11] io**
Love is all!
**[13:14] atsu**
Are you... being forced to say this?
**[13:16] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[13:18] yumoto**
I get it!
**[13:19] yumoto**
Making us pose and say embarrassing lines
is part of your mysterious power, right?
**[13:23] wom**
No, it is the power of love!
**[13:26] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[13:29] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[13:33] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[14:00] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[14:01] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[14:05] en**
Love Making.
**[14:15] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[14:16] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[14:19] atsu**
Love Making!
**[14:29] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[14:30] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[14:34] io**
Love Making.
**[14:44] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[14:45] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[14:48] ryuu**
Love Making!
**[14:58] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[14:59] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[15:02] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[15:05] five**
Of love!
**[15:08] yumoto**
What is all this?!
**[15:11] en**
We look like some third-rate idol group.
**[15:14] io**
I know. The needless exposure
and mysterious ornamentations...
**[15:17] io**
This is clearly beyond weird.
**[15:19] ryuu**
But it looks better on
me than I was expecting!
**[15:21] io**
I suppose it does.
**[15:23] ryuu**
This will be trouble!
I'll end up even more popular.
**[15:26] atsu**
It won't come off!
**[15:27] en**
Seriously?
**[15:28] en**
Seriously!
**[15:29] io**
What, we have to stay like this forever?!
**[15:31] en**
Please, undo this!
**[15:33] wombat**
It's a bit late to be saying that!
**[15:35] wombat**
You boys are the Battle Lovers
who protect the Earth!
**[15:39] yumoto**
And what's this "Sparkling Prince" stuff?
**[15:41] yumoto**
I don't think it's quite right
for me to call myself a prince.
**[15:44] atsu**
You seem overly self-conscious.
**[15:46] wombat**
No matter.
**[15:47] wombat**
You are the heirs to the throne of love,
**[15:49] wombat**
so you have the right to call yourselves princes.
**[15:53] en**
It's not about having the right...
**[15:55] atsu**
First of all, we don't
want to be heirs to that.
**[15:57] wombat**
What was that?!
**[15:59] yumoto**
I don't even know what
the "throne of love" is.
**[16:01] ryuu**
I hope it's romantic love.
**[16:02] io**
It's not.
**[16:04] chikuwa**
I don't need love!
**[16:08] atsu**
The Chikuwabu Monster has lost his temper!
**[16:10] atsu**
He forced his way into the conversation!
**[16:12] chikuwa**
Live and die for love? Hah!
**[16:15] chikuwa**
Humans should all just die!
**[16:19] yumoto**
Broth? Broth?!
**[16:20] chikuwa**
No one needs daikon radish, egg,
chikuwa, hanpen, or cabbage rolls!
**[16:24] chikuwa**
I'm going to make a world of only chikuwabu!
**[16:27] trio**
Huh?!
**[16:29] chikuwa**
Once I do, the world will be united!
**[16:38] atsu**
What is this?
**[16:39] wombat**
This is your Love Making power!
**[16:42] wombat**
It's a "love up" of your inner love!
**[16:46] yumoto**
Cool!
**[16:48] yumoto**
Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy!
**[16:49] wombat**
You tried to destroy the people
who live on this lovable Earth.
**[16:54] wombat**
Go, and love even your enemies!
**[17:00] yumoto**
Love Stick!
**[17:04] en**
Huh? Is this love or discipline?
**[17:08] wombat**
Love, while gentle, is also harsh!
**[17:10] yumoto**
Can I shoot a beam with this? Can I?
**[17:13] yumoto**
Can I?!
**[17:15] yumoto**
I can!
**[17:16] four**
Seriously?!
**[17:17] chikuwa**
Love can go take a hike!
**[17:22] yumoto**
Yeah!
**[17:23] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince is gonna
sparkle your sparkles off!
**[17:34] atsu**
It's incredible how quickly he adapts.
**[17:36] en**
Yeah.
**[17:38] ryuu**
I don't like letting him
get all the limelight.
**[17:41] oi**
Oh? You getting in the mood?
**[17:43] ryuu**
I could tell great stories about this later.
**[17:44] ryuu**
I'm going to join the fight!
**[17:47] atsu**
Well, we may as well treat a farce as a farce...
**[17:49] en**
...and just get it over with quickly.
**[17:51] io**
Yeah.
**[18:00] atsu**
Um, let's go with... Something-or-Other Storm!
**[18:04] monster**
What?!
**[18:06] atsu**
It actually fired!
**[18:07] en**
That was pretty random.
**[18:09] en**
Random Splash!
**[18:13] io**
Then I'll join in.
**[18:14] io**
Added Margin Bomber!
**[18:18] ryuu**
That's not fair! I got here first!
**[18:20] ryuu**
I Am Awesome Fire!
**[18:25] monster**
Five against one is cheating!
**[18:27] atsu**
Yeah, right. You were the one
saying all humans should die.
**[18:31] atsu**
You can't let five of them scare you.
**[18:33] yumoto**
Okay, let's go! Something-or-Other—
**[18:35] wombat**
Pardon me.
**[18:36] wombat**
Could you all please stop calling
out random attack names?
**[18:42] yumoto**
In that case, our powers unite to...
**[18:56] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[19:12] atsu**
Hey, Yumoto, that was overkill.
**[19:15] monster**
I don't need your pity.
**[19:17] monster**
Charity and comfort are useless to me.
**[19:22] en**
That's convenient for an enemy to say.
**[19:24] atsu**
Stop this! If you say any more,
you'll raise a defeat flag!
**[19:28] monster**
We chikuwabu have a chikuwabu sort of pride!
**[19:32] monster**
Even if you won't acknowledge its existence,
**[19:34] monster**
I will continue to live on, as chikuwabu!
**[19:37] atsu**
It's not that we don't acknowledge it...
**[19:40] ryuu**
If I have to choose one way or
the other, I like chikuwabu.
**[19:43] en**
Yeah.
**[19:44] en**
Some people have strange tastes.
Good things will come your way someday.
**[19:47] io**
That's not very convincing support.
**[19:50] monster**
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
**[19:52] monster**
I don't need your support!
**[19:54] monster**
Inconspicuousness is still a flavor!
**[19:56] monster**
It beats ending up with a dubious status like
burdock tempura or squid tentacle tempura!
**[20:00] monster**
Lay off, jerk!
**[20:05] en**
Physical force?
**[20:06] atsu**
What was the point of that
finishing move earlier?
**[20:08] yumoto**
Listen, you need to wake up!
**[20:11] yumoto**
Oden isn't complete with only one ingredient.
**[20:14] yumoto**
The popular trio of daikon radish,
egg, and mochi-stuffed tofu,
**[20:18] yumoto**
the low-profile burdock tempura,
**[20:19] yumoto**
the amiable thick-fried tofu,
the non-conforming cabbage rolls...
**[20:23] yumoto**
And chikuwabu!
**[20:24] yumoto**
When they all come together,
that's what you call oden!
**[20:27] yumoto**
The world, the Earth... It's all oden, too!
**[20:30] yumoto**
Oden is the Earth! You get it?
**[20:34] ---**
Uh-huh.
**[20:36] io**
He kind of forced it all to fit together, huh?
**[20:38] ryuu**
I can't tell if that's too big or too small.
**[20:42] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[20:52] monster**
What is this mysterious sensation?
**[20:55] monster**
Comfort... Healing...
**[20:57] monster**
I feel the universe soaking
into me like a golden broth...
**[21:00] monster**
I see... So this is love...
**[21:07] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[21:09] four**
No, it's not!
**[21:11] en**
Huh? What was that guy's name?
**[21:13] en**
From the class next to ours...
**[21:15] atsu**
I remember. He's kinda low-profile, but...
**[21:18] en**
He looks clean and refreshed,
like he just had a bath.
**[21:20] ---**
Yeah.
**[21:21] io**
While we're the ones who are a total mess.
**[21:25] ryuu**
I reek of broth!
**[21:26] yumoto**
When that happens,
just hit up the Kurotama Bath!
**[21:29] yumoto**
I have coupons!
**[21:31] yumoto**
Oh, yeah!
**[21:32] yumoto**
One for you, too!
**[21:34] en**
Yeah, let's do that.
A hot bath after a bloodbath.
**[21:37] atsu**
Ugh, that pissed me off.
**[21:39] io**
Me, too.
**[21:39] ryuu**
Totally.
**[21:40] wombat**
I'll join you!
**[21:42] yumoto**
Come on over!
**[21:43] atsu**
Say, why is Mr. Tawarayama
carrying you everywhere?
**[21:46] wombat**
If I get too far away from him...
**[21:50] white**
Just who are they?
**[21:53] light**
Has someone appeared to try to defy us?
**[21:57] white**
No matter. This is well within our expectations.
**[22:01] white**
Next time, the real battle will begin.
**[22:05] hedgehog**
Prepare yourselves, Earth Conquest Club.
**[22:08] white**
Yes, sir.
**[23:40] yumoto**
Before we even realized what was happening,
**[23:42] yumoto**
we ended up protecting the Earth!
**[23:45] yumoto**
But I don't mind joining the Battle Lovers
if it means I get to cuddle Wombat!
**[23:50] yumoto**
Next time: Love Means Never Feeling Regret.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love Means Never Feeling Regret
**[23:53] yumoto**
Love Making!
# 2 - Love Means Never Feeling Regret
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Love Means Never Feeling Regret
**[01:36] kusatsu**
Arima. It's too soon.
**[01:38] ari**
Really?
**[01:39] ari**
I don't think one or two minutes
makes a difference, myself...
**[01:43] kusatsu**
Those who are negligent in etiquette
will be negligent in all things.
**[01:47] kusatsu**
Lifestyle, academics,
**[01:49] kusatsu**
self-respect...
**[01:51] ari**
Yes, yes. Whatever you say.
**[01:55] gero**
President Kusatsu is as strict as ever.
**[01:58] kusa**
Akoya, it is easy to drift downwards.
**[02:01] kusa**
We, the student council of Binan High School,
**[02:04] kusa**
regard foolishness and mediocrity as a sin.
**[02:06] kusa**
We must not approve of it.
**[02:08] gero**
Understood.
**[02:09] arima**
Here you are. This is Seishodo's "White Dew."
**[02:16] gero**
Arima-san, it's delicious.
**[02:21] arima**
Glad to hear it.
**[02:22] arima**
It was worth sending away for.
**[02:25] zun**
Now, rulers of this blue world.
**[02:28] zun**
Members of the noble Caerula Adamas.
**[02:30] zun**
Let us begin the executive meeting of the
Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms Project.
**[02:35] yumoto**
*Feel the power...*
**[02:37] all**
*Of love!*
**[02:41] arima**
Why are their faces blurred out?
Their voices are strange, too.
**[02:45] kusa**
We haven't done anything to it.
**[02:47] kusa**
It seems they scrambled the
information themselves.
**[02:50] yumoto**
*Love is over!*
**[02:53] kusa**
Do you think they intend to interrupt our
Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms Project,
**[02:59] kusa**
Lord Zundar?
**[03:00] zun**
The possibility exists.
**[03:03] gero**
Does that mean they've been given
the same technology we have?
**[03:09] zun**
That voice and image filter is a product
of highly advanced scientific technology.
**[03:14] ari**
You mean that "voices have been changed
in the interests of privacy" thing?
**[03:19] zun**
It is on par with the scientific
technology of my planet.
**[03:23] kusa**
Planet Evil, you mean?
**[03:25] zun**
Correct.
**[03:27] zun**
If they do exist to oppose us,
we will need to take caution.
**[03:31] gero**
The things they wear and say
have no style whatsoever.
**[03:34] gero**
They can't possibly compete with us.
**[03:36] gero**
Or should I say, I dislike even the
idea of thinking them as equals.
**[03:40] ari**
I suppose we should watch them for a while?
**[03:42] zun**
If they appear next time, we will
need to consider countermeasures.
**[03:46] zun**
For now, let us move forward
with the Earth Conquest Project.
**[03:50] kusa**
Yes. The superior should rule and
guide the world's development.
**[03:54] kusa**
To this end, the foolish and the acts
of barbarism they commit must be purged.
**[03:59] ari**
That's quite the ambitious undertaking, I must say.
**[04:02] kusa**
Well then, Arima...
**[04:04] kusa**
The state of this Earth.
**[04:05] kusa**
This city.
**[04:07] kusa**
This school. Do you approve of it?
**[04:10] kusa**
Base and vulgar.
**[04:12] kusa**
Ignorant and incompetent.
**[04:13] kusa**
Stupid and silly.
**[04:16] kusa**
Should such students run
rampant over Binan High School?
**[04:19] ari**
Oh, well...
**[04:23] ari**
I do think some degree of
order might be necessary.
**[04:26] kusa**
Which means we must first establish a
model society in our immediate vicinity.
**[04:31] kusa**
Namely...
**[04:32] gero**
The Binan High School Conquest Project, right?
**[04:36] gero**
I unilaterally agree with President Kusatsu.
**[04:39] gero**
I don't want to look at ugly and dirty things.
**[04:42] zun**
The inferior beings should fight with
their fellows, and destroy themselves.
**[04:48] kusa**
That's entirely logical.
**[04:50] zun**
Then you should make use of the humans'
short-tempered, violent natures.
**[04:54] zun**
First, we need someone who
can execute the operation.
**[04:57] kusa**
Find someone to be our puppet,
and act through them, right?
**[05:02] zun**
Correct.
**[05:04] zun**
Lend him just a bit of our power.
**[05:07] zun**
Anger, hatred, jealousy...
**[05:10] zun**
They burn more easily than dry leaves.
**[05:14] kusa**
Understood, Lord Zundar.
**[05:16] kusa**
Then let us find us our fool at once.
**[05:19] zun**
Caerula Adamas, I leave this to you.
**[05:22] all**
Sir!
**[05:25] en**
Did you know?
**[05:27] en**
People say it's not true
that forests are disappearing
**[05:30] en**
to make disposable chopsticks.
**[05:32] ryu**
Where did that come from, Yufuin-senpai?
**[05:35] en**
Disposable chopsticks are made from
trees cut down to thin out forests,
**[05:38] en**
so they're logical from an eco-friendly,
recycling point of view.
**[05:41] atsu**
I know that.
**[05:43] en**
Well then, the phrase "boiled down"
**[05:46] en**
originally referred to reaching a
conclusion after a lengthy discussion.
**[05:50] en**
Did you know that?
**[05:51] atsu**
A crime of conscience or
inappropriate laughter, right?
**[05:53] yumoto**
Speaking of disposable
chopsticks getting boiled down,
**[05:55] yumoto**
my bro Gora taught me...
**[05:56] yumoto**
"Menma is just recycled disposable chopsticks."
**[05:59] ryu**
Wow, he's an idiot.
**[06:01] yumoto**
But it's kinda like disposable chopsticks, isn't it?
**[06:04] ryu**
It's just thin and rectangular, right?
**[06:05] yumoto**
It's also crisp.
**[06:07] ryu**
That doesn't mean it's chopsticks.
**[06:09] ryu**
The crispiness comes from the
bamboo it's made from.
**[06:11] yumoto**
There are disposable chopsticks
made from bamboo, too.
**[06:13] ryu**
Are you that determined to
say menma is chopsticks?
**[06:16] yumoto**
What are you saying, Ryuu-senpai?
**[06:18] yumoto**
Menma is menma.
**[06:19] ryu**
You're the one who brought it up!
**[06:21] io**
Anyway, can we talk about why
Wombat appears to be dead now?
**[06:26] yumoto**
I need one cuddle a day!
**[06:29] atsu**
I have no idea why that deserves a thumbs up.
**[06:31] yumoto**
What? It's the obvious compensation.
**[06:34] atsu**
For what?
**[06:35] yumoto**
You know, for the fight...
The Love Busters thing.
**[06:39] en**
Oh. Yeah.
**[06:41] wombat**
It's not the Love Busters!
It's the Battle Lovers!
**[06:45] wombat**
At least try to remember your own name!
**[06:49] en**
Love Battlers, Bust Lovers...
**[06:52] en**
They're both embarrassing,
so what's the difference?
**[06:54] wombat**
Battle Lovers is a venerable and noble title!
**[06:58] ryu**
Can't be, it's English.
**[06:59] io**
At least be consistent about whether
you're an alien or a foreigner.
**[07:01] ryu**
So inconsistent.
**[07:04] en**
Plus...
**[07:05] en**
These things won't come off.
**[07:08] wombat**
They're not "these things"!
They're Lovracelets!
**[07:12] atsu**
Yeah.
**[07:13] atsu**
The inability to remember proper names
means you're getting old, you know.
**[07:17] en**
Seriously? Is it bad?
**[07:20] io**
It's bad, Yufuin-senpai.
**[07:22] io**
Trying to have a conversation on nothing but
"these things," "those things," and "that thing"
**[07:25] io**
definitely means you're getting old.
**[07:27] ryu**
So, there's one person here
who hasn't said a single word,
**[07:30] ryu**
let alone a proper name.
**[07:36] ryu**
Mr. Tawarayama there.
**[07:38] wombat**
No! He'll rot!
**[07:41] tawara**
Now you need not worry.
**[07:43] all**
No, no, no...
**[07:44] ryu**
"Need not" in this day and age...
**[07:46] io**
What did you mean, "rot"?
**[07:47] wombat**
What I mean is, if I get too far away,
**[07:51] wombat**
this body's cellular metabolism will cease and...
**[07:54] yumoto**
You mean he's dead?
**[07:56] wombat**
In your planet's terms.
**[07:59] en**
That's a corpse?
**[08:00] atsu**
Dead? So you killed him?
**[08:01] ryu**
Murderer!
**[08:02] io**
That's a crime.
**[08:05] yumoto**
Cold?
**[08:06] atsu**
I don't know how you can touch him, Yumoto.
**[08:08] yumoto**
Yeah? But he's not that cold!
**[08:10] io**
But he's dead!
**[08:10] ryu**
Liar!
**[08:11] wombat**
Wait a minute.
**[08:13] wombat**
This individual is dead, but he is also alive.
**[08:17] atsu**
What's with the Schrödinger reference?
**[08:19] wombat**
No, it's true!
**[08:22] en**
This is starting to annoy me.
**[08:24] tawara**
I shall describe my current ability to
function independently as "difficult."
**[08:30] io**
That old man speak is really irritating me.
**[08:33] ryu**
You've got our teacher's character all wrong.
**[08:35] atsu**
He seriously seems possessed.
**[08:37] tawara**
I am currently in stasis,
but I shall recover shortly.
**[08:42] atsu**
Even though you're dead?
**[08:43] tawara**
Scientifically advanced medical mechanisms
are currently at work in my body.
**[08:47] tawara**
You need not worry.
**[08:49] en**
Easier said than done.
**[08:51] wombat**
As long as I am within a certain range,
his life will not be in danger.
**[08:55] wombat**
You know the saying.
**[08:56] wombat**
We are "living jointly"!
**[08:59] atsu**
I don't know where you pulled that one from...
**[09:01] io**
Putting off dealing with problems
is called the Concorde Effect.
**[09:04] io**
It just increases your debt.
**[09:06] ryu**
Besides, you can't say you love Earth
when you killed someone on it.
**[09:09] wombat**
There was a reason for that!
**[09:11] atsu**
What's the reason?
**[09:12] wombat**
It happened the other day,
just after I arrived on Earth!
**[09:16] wombat**
When I was expressing my admiration
**[09:19] wombat**
for the generous character and
clean habits of the people of Earth!
**[09:23] atsu**
Does he mean the public bath?
**[09:24] yumoto**
It's us!
**[09:26] yumoto**
The Kurotama Bath is always open for business!
**[09:28] wombat**
But then I was chased around by
an extremely belligerent individual!
**[09:32] yumoto**
Huh? Who was that?
**[09:34] yumoto**
Me?!
**[09:35] both**
Ah.
**[09:37] wombat**
In order to escape his relentless pursuit,
**[09:40] wombat**
I had no choice but to run with all my might!
**[09:43] wombat**
Help me!
**[10:06] en**
You did it, huh?
**[10:07] atsu**
You sure did it.
**[10:08] io**
You did it, all right.
**[10:09] ryu**
Really did it.
**[10:12] wombat**
Y-Yes, but...
**[10:13] wombat**
Is the responsibility truly mine alone to bear?
**[10:17] yumoto**
What? Me?
**[10:18] io**
Well, given the force he was
about to get cuddled with,
**[10:22] io**
maybe he was right to run.
**[10:24] ryu**
"Sekuhara"? No, you'd call it "anihara," right?
**[10:26] atsu**
Animal harassment, yeah.
**[10:29] yumoto**
I get it.
**[10:31] yumoto**
In that case, Wombat, cuddle me!
**[10:34] yumoto**
As much as you like.
**[10:35] yumoto**
Do it to your heart's content!
**[10:37] wombat**
I refuse!
**[10:38] yumoto**
Why?!
**[10:39] wombat**
I don't want cuddles, I want you
to work as the Battle Lovers!
**[10:43] wombat**
What I want more than anything
is for you to love the Earth!
**[10:46] yumoto**
But you can just love me!
**[10:49] en**
Question.
**[10:51] en**
You mean we'll have to put on
those weird costumes again?
**[10:54] atsu**
More than the costumes, I disliked
those grandiose introductory speeches.
**[10:57] ryu**
If it were just the costume...
**[10:59] io**
What? "If"? You mean you'd be fine
if it was just the costume?
**[11:02] ryu**
If I think of it as cosplay, it's totally fine.
**[11:05] ryu**
We can fire beams, too!
**[11:06] io**
Now that you mention it...
**[11:08] yumoto**
Well, if my cute li'l Wombat
asks it of me, I'll take it on!
**[11:12] en**
Hold on a minute.
**[11:14] en**
Can you really take something
like this on that easily?
**[11:16] atsu**
And how long will we have to do it?
**[11:18] wombat**
Until the Earth is filled with love, naturally!
**[11:23] en**
You're so creepy.
**[11:25] io**
Love? What's that?
**[11:27] ryu**
It's like, being happy, right?
**[11:29] ryu**
Like me. Or me.
**[11:31] io**
Just you, huh, Ryuu?
**[11:33] ryu**
I think love is found in the
trivial, realistic moments.
**[11:36] ryu**
Like sharing a can of coffee with a girl,
**[11:39] ryu**
or when your shoulders brush
when the train shakes!
**[11:42] io**
I bet I'll feel love when I get
one billion in my Cayman Islands account.
***SIGN*** One Billion
**[11:46] ryu**
Talk about corrupt!
**[11:47] atsu**
It's fine that everyone has
his own definition of love.
**[11:50] atsu**
But are you okay with having
to wear embarrassing costumes,
**[11:53] atsu**
say embarrassing lines,
and do embarrassing things
**[11:55] atsu**
for the foreseeable future?
**[11:57] wombat**
I told you, it's nothing
to be embarrassed about!
**[12:00] en**
By the way...
**[12:02] en**
Is it okay for you to be away
from Mr. Tawarayama right now?
**[12:06] tawara**
It is fine.
**[12:08] en**
Freezing and thawing something over
and over makes it brittle, y'know?
**[12:12] atsu**
You need to take care with perishables.
**[12:14] yumoto**
Like sell-by dates.
**[12:15] wombat**
I'm sorry!
**[12:17] yumoto**
It's okay. I don't mind it so much.
**[12:19] four**
You *should* mind!
***SIGN*** Yufuin En
Born July 2nd
Blood Type B / Cancer
Hobby: Napping
Likes: Sleeping in, hot spring manju
***SIGN*** On sale this week New menu item!
***SIGN*** Chicken Cutlet Curry Tanmen
**[12:32] kusa**
Now then...
**[12:34] kusa**
That stench...
**[12:36] gero**
What's wrong?
**[12:37] ari**
Kinshiro hates curry to death.
***SIGN*** Hashida Wario
**[12:44] hashi**
*My name is Hashida Wario.*
**[12:47] hashi**
*I like a world of order and rules.*
**[12:51] hashi**
*The thing I hate most is pi.*
**[12:53] hashi**
*Because it doesn't divide evenly.*
**[12:55] hashi**
* On that note, I also hate*
* families with three children.*
**[12:57] hashi**
* When parents and grandparents get*
* together for birthdays and Christmas*
**[13:00] hashi**
*and you have seven people sharing a cake...*
**[13:04] hashi**
*It's unbearable.*
**[13:06] hashi**
* It would be better if the*
* grandparents would just...*
**[13:12] zun**
He is the one.
**[13:14] kusa**
Why?
**[13:15] zun**
His narrow-minded heart that permits
no compromise will create a raging flame.
**[13:20] kusa**
Yes, Lord Zundar.
**[13:26] kusa**
Conquest!
**[13:33] kusa**
The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
**[13:35] kusa**
Aurite!
**[13:39] ari**
The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
**[13:42] ari**
Argent!
**[13:47] gero**
The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
**[13:50] gero**
Perlite!
**[13:52] trio**
We are the rulers of this blue world...
**[13:55] trio**
Caerula Adamas!
**[13:57] zun**
Now, release the Zundar Needle!
**[14:02] kusa**
Aurum!
**[14:04] ari**
Argentum!
**[14:06] gero**
Perla!
**[14:10] trio**
Donum!
**[14:33] wari**
That which is not evenly divisible!
**[14:34] wari**
That which is warped!
That which is not equal!
**[14:37] wari**
Multiply further!
**[14:38] wari**
Warp this world and destroy it!
**[14:42] wari**
Asymmetry Beam, fire!
**[14:53] guy**
Hey!
**[14:54] guy**
Move your hand!
**[14:55] guy**
I can't get to the chopsticks!
**[14:57] guy**
That's *your* fault!
**[15:04] ari**
Are mismatched chopsticks really
enough to start a fight like this?
**[15:08] gero**
It really is fighting and self-destruction.
**[15:10] kusa**
Their own foolishness is to blame.
**[15:15] en**
The Lovracelet's reacting,
**[15:17] en**
but there's no need for all of us to go, right?
**[15:19] en**
I'm taking today off.
**[15:21] ryuu**
You mean it, Yufuin-senpai?
**[15:23] atsu**
Roger that. If we're short on
people, we might call you, though.
**[15:26] io**
Okay, permission given.
**[15:28] wombat**
Hey! Wait just one minute!
**[15:31] wombat**
Since ancient times, there have always
been five heirs to the throne of love!
**[15:35] yumoto**
What, really?
**[15:36] wombat**
I can't allow you to reduce and
revert their numbers so lightly!
**[15:41] en**
What? Sounds like a pain.
**[15:43] wombat**
Why do you think I went to all that trouble
**[15:45] wombat**
of thinking up five introductory speeches?!
**[15:48] atsu**
What, you thought up those lines?
**[15:50] ryuu**
No wonder I thought they had no style.
**[15:53] wombat**
But I spent a whole week thinking them up...
**[15:56] ryuu**
They have no style.
**[15:57] wombat**
You said it twice!
**[15:59] yumoto**
Well, I think it's best if all five of us go.
**[16:02] wombat**
See? See? See?!
**[16:04] en**
How come?
**[16:05] yumoto**
Just a feeling, I guess.
**[16:06] yumoto**
Or maybe I just like odd numbers
better than even ones!
**[16:11] atsu**
That's a more unintelligible
reason than I was expecting.
**[16:14] yumoto**
And we already went out together once!
**[16:16] ryuu**
It's true that it feels more complete that way.
**[16:18] io**
And you like that outfit, right, Ryuu?
**[16:22] ryuu**
It really does look good on me...
**[16:23] wombat**
I don't care! Just, please, get out there!
**[16:27] en**
Guess I don't have a choice.
**[16:29] en**
Might as well go.
**[16:30] wombat**
Then Love Making into the
Battle Lovers right now!
**[16:37] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[16:41] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[16:43] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[16:45] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[16:46] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[16:48] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[16:50] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[16:52] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[16:53] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[16:55] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[16:57] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[17:00] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[17:03] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[17:06] io**
Love is all!
**[17:08] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[17:10] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[17:13] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[17:15] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[17:17] five**
Of love!
**[17:20] wari**
Disorderly things!
**[17:21] wari**
Inadequate things! Superfluous things!
**[17:23] wari**
Destroy them all this instant!
**[17:26] yumoto**
Wait!
**[17:28] yumoto**
We're gonna defeat you!
**[17:29] wari**
What?
**[17:30] ryu**
That's too abridged!
**[17:31] yumoto**
But we already introduced ourselves before!
**[17:34] en**
I want to go home already,
so let's get this done.
**[17:37] io**
That's a careless line no hero should say.
**[17:39] io**
You're amazing, Yufuin-senpai.
**[17:39] guy**
What the heck?
**[17:40] guy**
"Defeat you"?
**[17:42] guy**
How embarrassing.
**[17:44] yufuin**
They're right to react like that.
**[17:46] atsu**
Hey, do they recognize us?
**[17:48] wombat**
Worry not!
**[17:50] wombat**
Your images and voices have been altered
to protect your personal information.
***SIGN*** *Image and voices have been altered to protect privacy
**[17:54] en**
They'll still recognize us if we use our real names.
**[17:56] en**
For now, I'm Cerulean!
**[17:58] en**
Take this!
**[18:02] wari**
Hey, that was dangerous!
**[18:05] yumoto**
Yu— Cerulean-senpai's really into it!
**[18:08] en**
I told you, I want to get home.
**[18:10] wari**
Five! An indivisible number!
**[18:13] wari**
Then I will erase you!
**[18:15] atsu**
What was that?
**[18:17] wari**
The world must be beautifully
symmetrical and even!
**[18:20] ryuu**
What are you talking about?
**[18:25] ryuu**
You mean, you don't like this kind of thing?
**[18:28] wari**
Are you stupid?!
**[18:30] wari**
Don't show me that thing!
**[18:40] yumoto**
Senpai!
**[18:45] yumoto**
What'd you do that for?!
**[18:47] wari**
I will destroy warped things
and incomplete sets!
**[18:51] yumoto**
Why?
**[18:52] yumoto**
What's wrong with disposable chopsticks?
**[18:58] atsu**
The splinters!
**[19:00] atsu**
The splinters from the
chopsticks got Yu— got Scarlet!
**[19:03] en**
Those things really hurt.
**[19:18] yumoto**
This thing's making rattling noises!
**[19:19] wari**
A mass of chopsticks acts as my armor,
**[19:23] wari**
rendering your attacks useless!
**[19:30] wari**
The finish!
**[19:34] yumoto**
If you hate disposable chopsticks that much,
**[19:36] yumoto**
don't use them to protect yourself!
**[19:40] yumoto**
Just bring your own chopsticks!
**[19:43] yumoto**
These irregular chopsticks you're trying to
destroy have a great purpose behind them!
**[19:48] wari**
Purpose?!
**[19:50] yumoto**
I'm talking about...
**[19:52] yumoto**
A child's rifle!
**[19:53] wari**
Ch-Child's rifle?!
**[19:56] yumoto**
Can something so cool exist
in this world? No, it can't!
**[19:59] wari**
A rhetorical question?!
**[20:02] yumoto**
Scarlet Lumiere!
**[20:10] yumoto**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[20:13] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[20:15] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[20:18] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[20:20] ryuu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[20:35] all**
Love Attack!
**[20:49] yumoto**
Your inability to see disposable chopsticks
as anything but chopsticks was your downfall.
**[20:52] yumoto**
Wash your used chopsticks and use them again!
**[20:55] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[21:04] wari**
What is this sensation?
**[21:06] wari**
Comfort... Healing...
**[21:07] wari**
So this is love...
**[21:14] hashi**
Eco-friendly...
**[21:17] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[21:19] four**
We told you, it's not!
**[21:21] ryuu**
Well, whatever.
**[21:24] kusa**
One thing has become very clear.
**[21:28] kusa**
They are our enemies.
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[21:36] gora**
Yumoto. How's the bath?
**[21:39] yumoto**
Just perfect, Gora.
**[21:41] en**
As I thought, there was no
need for all five of us.
**[21:43] atsu**
Yumoto just handled it all by himself.
With the force of a storm.
**[21:47] ryuu**
I never got to show off.
**[21:48] wombat**
Try harder next time.
**[21:51] ryuu**
That pisses me off! What's your
problem, you overgrown rodent?
**[21:53] wombat**
I am not a rodent!
**[21:56] io**
He's a marsupial.
**[21:56] wombat**
What are you saying?!
**[21:59] yumoto**
Huh?
**[22:00] yumoto**
Will Mr. Tawaramura be okay
in hot water like this?
**[22:04] wombat**
Ah, wait...
**[23:41] en**
A pretty boy contest at an all-boys' school?
**[23:43] en**
There's something wrong with this place.
**[23:45] en**
But the Ballet Club advisor,
Kurotori, is really pushing for it.
**[23:49] en**
Ugh, what a pain.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Feel Love, Narcissus!
**[23:50] en**
Next time: Feel Love, Narcissus!
**[23:52] en**
Love Making!
# 3 - Feel Love, Narcissus!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Tradition! Binan High School
Pretty Boy Contest
***SIGN*** Beautiful, Proper, Pure
***SIGN*** The 27th of Every Month is Pretty Boy Day
**[00:08] kuro**
*My name is Kurotori Moteo.*
**[00:11] kuro**
*Advisor to Binan High School's Ballet Club.*
**[00:13] kuro**
*Likes: Being popular.*
**[00:16] kuro**
*Dislikes: Heaviness.*
***SIGN*** Kurotori Moteo
**[00:18] kuro**
*It carries no weight with the ladies.*
**[00:19] kuro**
This month, at last...
**[00:22] kuro**
I will take the crown of Binan
High School's #1 Pretty Boy!
**[00:40] en**
I saw nothing.
**[00:42] atsu**
Let's say we saw nothing.
**[00:43] en**
That's just what he wants.
**[00:45] yumoto**
How come?
**[00:46] yumoto**
You could see Mr. Kurotori's entire—
**[00:49] en**
It's fine for you! You're the bath attendant.
**[00:52] atsu**
Since it's something we didn't want to see,
**[00:55] atsu**
we want to say we didn't see it!
**[00:57] yumoto**
Huh? Why didn't you want
to see Mr. Kurotori's—
**[01:01] atsu**
There's no reason!
**[01:02] en**
Most people wouldn't want to see that.
**[01:04] yumoto**
What's wrong with hanging out naked?
**[01:06] yumoto**
I love it. Seeing it *and* showing it!
**[01:10] kuro**
Hello there.
**[01:12] kuro**
My sweet honeys.
**[01:14] kuro**
Pardon me for going on ahead.
**[01:17] atsu**
G-Goodbye.
**[01:19] yumoto**
Thanks for coming!
**[01:21] kuro**
Spin, spin, spin!
**[01:23] kuro**
Spin, spin, spin!
***SIGN*** Feel Love, Narcissus!
**[03:01] en**
Oh? That had to be on purpose, right?
**[03:04] atsu**
Yeah.
**[03:05] en**
Did you know?
**[03:06] en**
They say that hiring him for
our school was an accident.
**[03:11] atsu**
Mr. Kurotori?
**[03:12] en**
Yeah. Apparently the principal
wanted a volleyball club advisor,
**[03:17] en**
but he accidentally hired a
ballet dance club advisor.
**[03:21] atsu**
That seems too stupid to be true.
**[03:23] en**
But this is a principal who
holds monthly pretty boy contests
**[03:26] en**
even though it's an all-boys' school.
**[03:29] atsu**
Now that you mention it,
I suppose it *is* possible...
**[03:33] en**
But why hold a pretty boy
contest at an all-boys' school?
**[03:36] atsu**
Maybe it's *because* there are only boys here?
**[03:40] ryuu**
Huh? The Ballet Club?
**[03:42] kuro**
You are the chosen students.
***SIGN*** Ballet Club
**[03:44] kuro**
Because you both caught my eye.
**[03:47] kuro**
Well? Won't you arabesque with me?
**[03:52] io**
Is there a financial advantage
to be gained from this?
**[03:55] kuro**
One can expect profits from
recital entrance fees and,
**[03:57] kuro**
if one becomes a star, profits
from sales of merchandise.
**[04:01] io**
Merchandise, eh?
**[04:03] ryuu**
How do girls like it?
**[04:06] kuro**
It's no exaggeration to say that
90% of ballet fans are women.
**[04:10] kuro**
I await a positive response from you both.
**[04:14] gero**
That's the Ballet Club advisor, Kurotori.
**[04:17] gero**
He's been pestering me to join, too.
**[04:20] kusa**
I heard that his club
doesn't have a single member.
**[04:24] kuso**
If this keeps up, we will be
forced to shut his club down.
**[04:28] ari**
But Kurotori's goal probably isn't
to gain more club members.
**[04:32] ari**
It's to gain more fans.
**[04:36] kusa**
Disciples to give him votes
in the pretty boy contest, eh?
**[04:44] io**
In terms of cost-effectiveness,
the Ballet Club isn't a very good prospect.
**[04:47] ryuu**
You decided to calculate it?
**[04:49] io**
You never know where you might find gold.
**[04:52] io**
Would you ever join the Ballet Club, Ryuu?
**[04:55] ryuu**
Nah.
**[04:56] ryuu**
He said 90% of ballet fans are girls,
**[05:00] ryuu**
but the people around me
are 100% girls, all the time.
**[05:03] ryuu**
So if I did ballet, my ratio
would actually go down.
**[05:05] io**
Even if the ratio went down,
the overall parameters would go up...
**[05:09] io**
But I won't bother talking to you about numbers.
**[05:11] ryuu**
Well, all I know is...
**[05:13] io**
Money is...
**[05:14] ryuu**
Women are...
**[05:15] both**
Life!
**[05:16] boy**
Zaou-kun, Naruko-kun.
**[05:18] boy**
Here are the voting forms
for the pretty boy contest.
**[05:21] boy**
Put them in the voting box as usual.
**[05:24] io**
What an annoyance.
I can't make a single yen off this.
**[05:27] ryuu**
And if I don't take #1,
the girls will throw a fit.
**[05:31] gero**
You've never taken #1.
**[05:35] ryuu**
What are you looking at?
**[05:37] gero**
I could ask you the same.
**[05:38] gero**
You can't seem to take your eyes off me.
**[05:41] ryuu**
What are you talking about?
**[05:48] kuro**
Heading that way, my sweet honey?
**[05:51] kuro**
Why not celebrate youth in the Ballet Club?
**[05:57] yumoto**
That paper's great!
**[05:59] kuro**
Read the reverse side closely, too.
***SIGN*** Binan High School Pretty Boy Contest
Prince of Black Swannie
***SIGN*** Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori
**[06:02] kuro**
Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori.
**[06:05] yumoto**
This paper sure is great!
**[06:07] kuro**
The paper?
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[06:10] yumoto**
Basketball Club, go!
**[06:16] yumoto**
Now, the Ballet Club! Go!
**[06:21] yumoto**
Wow!
**[06:22] yumoto**
I knew it! The Ballet Club wins by a long shot!
**[06:26] io**
He seems to have spent a lot of money
on good paper for his pamphlets.
**[06:30] ryuu**
Lousy taste, though.
**[06:32] en**
What are you doing, Yumoto?
**[06:34] atsu**
Looks like he's deciding which club to join,
**[06:37] atsu**
based on paper airplane distance.
**[06:39] wombat**
That's horrible!
**[06:40] yumoto**
What is?
**[06:41] wombat**
You are already in a club-paparazzi!
**[06:44] yumoto**
Huh?
**[06:45] wombat**
Our "Defenders of Love Earth Defense Club"!
**[06:48] en**
Don't just name it without asking.
**[06:50] atsu**
And you're saying
authoritatively that it's a club?
**[06:52] wombat**
I submitted the application with
Tawarayama-san as the advisor.
**[06:56] yumoto**
But monsters don't attack every day.
**[06:59] yumoto**
I'm bored.
**[07:00] wombat**
That's no reason to two-time me!
**[07:03] wombat**
You play with me and cuddle
me every day, and yet...
**[07:06] yumoto**
But you only let me cuddle you once a day.
**[07:11] en**
Yumoto really is formidable.
**[07:13] ---**
Yeah.
**[07:14] ryuu**
Speaking of which, this pretty boy contest...
***SIGN*** Binan High School Pretty Boy Contest
Prince of Black Swannie
***SIGN*** Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori
**[07:17] ryuu**
When is it again?
***SIGN*** Pretty Boy Day
27th (bi-nan-shi)
**[07:18] io**
Every month on the 27th.
**[07:20] io**
"Binanshi" means Pretty Boy Day.
**[07:22] en**
Isn't "27" more like "two-na,"
which makes "Tuna" Day?
**[07:25] ryuu**
Not like I care, but the one thing
I can't stand is losing to that Gero guy.
**[07:29] yumoto**
Why is that?
**[07:30] en**
Did you actually have a rivalry going?
**[07:32] io**
Mildly so.
**[07:34] atsu**
Now that you mention it, last month,
Ryuu and Gero tied for 3rd place.
**[07:38] atsu**
With Kusatsu at #1 and Arima at #2.
**[07:41] ryuu**
I bet the student council members
got whole groups to vote for them!
**[07:44] ryuu**
The point is, I'm knocking Gero out.
**[07:47] en**
Sounds fun.
**[07:49] yumoto**
Huh? How so?
**[07:50] en**
A battle between the Earth
Defense Club's "#1 Hustler" Zaou
**[07:54] en**
vs. the student council's
"Chief Narcissist" Gero.
**[07:57] atsu**
You're bored too, huh, En-chan?
**[07:59] en**
Thus, I call a strategy meeting to
figure out how to bring Ryuu victory.
**[08:02] [SONG] sign**
What is POPULARITY?
**[08:03] en**
Here's the topic for debate.
**[08:04] atsu**
There? We're starting from there?
**[08:07] en**
It's not attractive to achieve
only superficial popularity.
**[08:10] en**
To achieve true popularity,
one must discover its essence.
**[08:14] ryuu**
Is this really going to make me #1?
**[08:17] wombat**
I have a question, as well.
**[08:19] wombat**
This is an all-boys' school.
**[08:21] wombat**
Is it acceptable that "popularity" in
this case refers to popularity with boys?
**[08:25] en**
It is.
**[08:26] atsu**
It is?
**[08:27] yumoto**
Huh? We're thinking of ways
to get popular with boys?
**[08:31] yumoto**
Putting all our heads together?
**[08:33] en**
It's for Ryuu's sake.
**[08:34] io**
Even if it won't earn me a single yen,
**[08:36] io**
I suppose I must, if it's for Ryuu's sake.
**[08:39] yumoto**
Huh? Seriously?
**[08:41] yumoto**
If you're gonna be popular, wouldn't
it be better to be popular with girls?
**[08:45] en**
You're so naïve, Yumoto.
**[08:47] en**
To be frank, there's no point
in being popular with girls.
**[08:49] yumoto**
Why not?
**[08:51] en**
Girls are to be admired.
**[08:53] ryuu**
You mean love them,
rather than be loved by them?
**[08:55] atsu**
They do say that men are
more admiring of manly traits.
**[08:59] en**
That's right.
**[09:00] en**
They also say that women betray,
but men do not.
**[09:04] io**
Although money is even more loyal.
**[09:07] en**
The point is, there's value
in being a man loved by men!
**[09:10] atsu**
He said it outright!
**[09:11] yumoto**
Oh! But now that you mention it,
when I watch yakuza flicks,
**[09:15] yumoto**
my heart always flutters at the
sight of a young gang leader.
**[09:18] atsu**
Did you just come out?!
**[09:19] en**
Okay. Now that we have the
definition of popularity,
**[09:22] en**
our next subject is "approach."
**[09:24] en**
How do you get popular
with men? Think about it!
**[09:26] ---**
Yeah!
**[09:28] wombat**
What are they so fired up for?
**[09:32] [SONG] sign**
[Requirements to be popular with men]
**[09:32] [SONG] sign**
1. Strength
2. Money
3. Brotherliness
**[09:33] en**
We've solidified the popularity requirements.
**[09:36] atsu**
The #1 requirement
being strength is realistic.
**[09:39] ryuu**
#3 being brotherliness is realistic, too.
**[09:42] io**
Money is important, too.
**[09:44] wombat**
You got tired of it, did you?
**[09:47] yumoto**
Yeah, 'cause I hate thinking.
**[09:50] en**
Okay. Let's put our approach
into practice, and see
**[09:55] en**
if it produces results!
**[09:56] all**
Yeah!
**[09:57] wombat**
Oh, if only they'd be so passionately
macho about being the Battle Lovers!
**[10:11] atsu**
En-chan. Can you do this?
**[10:12] atsu**
That guy looks strong.
**[10:14] en**
No problem. First...
**[10:16] en**
You kill with the eyes!
**[10:17] atsu**
Not with strength?
**[10:23] atsu**
Ready...
**[10:24] atsu**
Go!
**[10:28] yumoto**
Senpai! Go over the top!
**[10:31] en**
Yeah!
**[10:33] en**
Over... the... top!
**[10:43] atsu**
Winner: Yufuin!
**[10:45] en**
All right!
**[10:55] io**
Hey. What do you think of me?
**[10:58] boy**
What?
**[10:59] io**
I'm asking what you think of me.
**[11:01] boy**
Well... Nothing in particular...
**[11:03] io**
What about now?
***SIGN*** Account Balance
**[11:12] boy**
I-Incredible!
**[11:15] boy**
It's incredible!
**[11:17] en**
He's fallen.
**[11:18] yumoto**
The power of money is incredible!
***SIGN*** Class 1-A
**[11:28] ryuu**
Working hard?
**[11:32] boy**
Can we help you?
**[11:34] ryuu**
You're triplets, right?
**[11:35] boy**
Yes. As you can see.
**[11:37] ryuu**
You want a big brother?
**[11:39] trio**
Huh?
**[11:40] en**
That came out of nowhere.
**[11:41] atsu**
Well, let's watch to the end.
**[11:49] ryuu**
You enjoy this cleaning stuff?
**[11:52] boy**
We don't enjoy it...
**[11:54] boy**
But we're on duty, so...
**[11:55] boy**
We have to do it...
**[11:57] ryuu**
Then... I'll make it so you can't!
**[12:14] trio**
H-Huh?!
**[12:17] ryuu**
Now you can't clean, right?
**[12:20] ryuu**
It wasn't your fault.
**[12:22] ryuu**
Let's hang. Come on.
**[12:27] trio**
Big brother!
**[12:28] boy**
Big brother!
**[12:30] boy**
Let me call you big brother!
**[12:32] boy**
Big brother!
**[12:34] atsu**
He seized the hearts of the triplets?!
**[12:37] yumoto**
Cool!
**[12:39] ari**
Those idiots are up to something again.
**[12:42] gero**
It's not at all beautiful, is it?
**[12:44] kusa**
Things are drifting downwards. Let's go.
***SIGN*** Kinugawa Atsushi
Born October 5th
Blood Type A / Libra
Hobby: Jigsaw Puzzles
Likes: Baths, hot springs, curry
***SIGN*** Mr. Kurotori Rally
**[13:01] kuro**
Why? Why did no one come?!
**[13:05] kuro**
After I made such a grand showing
at the arm wrestling tournament...
**[13:10] kuro**
If this continues, my position of
#1 pretty boy in Binan High School
**[13:14] kuro**
will once again be taken
by the student council...
**[13:16] kuro**
No, by the dark horse,
the Earth Defense Club!
**[13:21] kuro**
Ah...
**[13:22] kuro**
They should all revere me,
honor me, love me! Why?!
**[13:26] kuro**
Why?!
**[13:28] zun**
He may be a suitable servant.
**[13:31] kusa**
Yes, Lord Zundar.
**[13:33] zun**
Go, Caerula Adamas!
**[13:40] kusa**
Conquest!
**[13:43] trio**
We are the rulers of this blue world...
**[13:45] trio**
Caerula Adamas!
**[13:48] zun**
Now, release the Zundar Needle!
**[13:54] kusa**
Aurum!
**[13:55] ari**
Argentum!
**[13:56] gero**
Perla!
**[14:01] trio**
Donum!
***SIGN*** 1579th Pretty Boy Contest
**[14:15] boy**
Today's the day to vote
in the pretty boy contest!
**[14:18] boy**
Please cast your pure,
proper, beautiful votes!
**[14:22] en**
We've done all we can.
**[14:24] en**
Now we wait for the
proclamation from on high.
**[14:26] atsu**
We have?
**[14:29] wrestler**
I'm voting for you.
**[14:31] en**
Right.
**[14:32] boy**
I'll put in for you, Naruko-kun.
**[14:33] io**
Thanks.
**[14:34] trio**
Big brother! We're gonna vote for you!
**[14:37] ryuu**
Let's play again sometime.
**[14:38] trio**
Eee!
**[14:40] yumoto**
Big brother.
**[14:42] ryuu**
Shut up.
***SIGN*** Pretty Boy Contest
**[14:45] ann**
Now, the man who will
shine as honored king
**[14:49] ann**
of the 1579th Binan High School
Pretty Boy Contest is...
**[14:56] ann**
The name is...
**[14:59] monster**
It's me!
**[15:02] monster**
Swan! Swan!
**[15:05] boy**
What's that thing?!
**[15:09] yumoto**
Hey! A monster appeared!
**[15:11] ryuu**
Why now, of all times?!
**[15:13] io**
I have money riding on this,
so I'd rather it not be ruined.
**[15:16] atsu**
What should we do?
**[15:17] en**
What a pain.
**[15:18] monster**
Everyone! Love me!
**[15:21] monster**
Love Feather Storm!
**[15:25] boy**
I love the guy with the black wings!
**[15:27] boy**
I love you!
**[15:32] yumoto**
Gross!
**[15:33] wombat**
Don't freak out! Fight!
**[15:36] ryuu**
What was that move, anyway?
**[15:38] io**
It's pretty idiotic.
**[15:39] atsu**
Part of me wants to applaud
the opponent's cleverness, but...
**[15:44] zun**
You see?
**[15:45] zun**
With this plan, we will create
a world where boys love boys,
**[15:48] zun**
thus allowing no one to create any progeny!
**[15:51] zun**
Now, the Earth will fall to ruin.
**[15:53] zun**
What will you do, Battle Lovers?!
**[15:56] wombat**
Hey!
**[15:57] wombat**
Would you get to the Love Making already?!
**[16:01] yumoto**
That's right! We can Love Making!
**[16:03] en**
Oh, we're doing that again?
**[16:06] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[16:33] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[16:35] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[16:37] en**
Love Making.
**[16:48] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[16:49] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[16:52] atsu**
Love Making.
**[17:02] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[17:03] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[17:07] oi**
Love Making.
**[17:16] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[17:18] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[17:21] ryuu**
Love Making!
**[17:31] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[17:33] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[17:36] monster**
What?!
**[17:38] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[17:40] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[17:43] io**
Love is all!
**[17:45] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[17:48] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[17:50] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[17:52] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[17:55] five**
Of love!
**[17:57] yumoto**
Scarlet Lumiere!
**[18:01] monster**
I'm glad to see you, Battle Lovers!
**[18:04] yumoto**
What?!
**[18:04] monster**
Now, love me to your heart's content!
**[18:08] monster**
Love Feather Splash!
**[18:11] all**
Ow! Ouch!
**[18:16] monster**
Once you've been pierced by
my love feathers, it's over!
**[18:18] monster**
No one can resist loving me!
**[18:21] monster**
Come on! Gimme a hug!
**[18:24] ryuu**
Damn! I wanna hug it!
**[18:26] io**
I'll pay money for it!
**[18:27] en**
I want to marry it.
**[18:31] atsu**
I can't take it! I'll be right back!
**[18:33] ryuu**
He ran off without us!
**[18:35] en**
I never realized he was that kind of guy.
**[18:41] yumoto**
Wow! You flew, Senpai!
**[18:47] atsu**
You, with your beautiful wings...
**[18:50] atsu**
Let me show you the love
that burns within me...
**[18:52] ryuu**
Hold it!
**[18:54] io**
I've got more money than him!
**[18:56] en**
I have marriage on my mind!
**[18:58] ryuu**
I love you!
**[18:59] io**
I love you!
**[18:59] en**
I love you!
**[19:00] atsu**
I love you!
**[19:03] monster**
That's perfect! More love!
Offer me all your love!
**[19:07] yumoto**
Darn it, these guys!
**[19:12] yumoto**
Senpai! You're humiliating yourself!
**[19:14] monster**
Don't interfere!
**[19:16] monster**
They love me!
**[19:18] monster**
Why don't you love me, too?
**[19:21] monster**
I hit you with my love feather!
**[19:24] yumoto**
I don't understand that kinda thing.
**[19:26] monster**
In that case...
**[19:28] monster**
What about now?!
**[19:33] yumoto**
Why do you want to be loved so badly?
**[19:36] monster**
Why...?
**[19:38] yumoto**
You've never loved anyone, have you?
**[19:41] yumoto**
I think loving feels way
better than being loved.
**[19:45] yumoto**
You can cuddle, and it feels really great!
**[19:48] monster**
Cuddle?
**[19:50] yumoto**
Yeah, cuddle!
**[19:51] yumoto**
And if there's no one you love right now,
**[19:53] yumoto**
you should try cuddling yourself!
**[19:56] yumoto**
It feels great!
**[19:58] en**
What is he talking about?
**[20:00] atsu**
I don't know, but it's very passionate.
**[20:03] yumoto**
Before you try to get anyone to love you,
**[20:06] yumoto**
try loving yourself first.
**[20:08] en**
Is now... our chance?
**[20:10] atsu**
Now!
**[20:12] yumoto**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[20:15] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[20:17] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[20:20] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[20:22] ryuu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[20:37] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[20:49] monster**
How could I not realize
something so important?!
**[20:52] monster**
He's right! How can you live
without loving yourself?
**[20:56] monster**
The one you should love... is yourself!
**[20:59] yumoto**
That's right!
**[21:00] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[21:08] monster**
I love me!
**[21:16] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[21:18] yumoto**
The monster was Mr. Kurotori?
**[21:22] ryuu**
He looks happy, though.
**[21:25] io**
Yes, he looks comfortable.
**[21:28] en**
I'm tired.
**[21:34] ari**
We lost again.
**[21:35] gero**
The Battle Lovers... Just who are they?
**[21:39] kusa**
We will surely have them grovel at our feet.
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[21:49] gora**
Yumoto. How's the water today?
**[21:53] yumoto**
Perfect again today, Gora.
**[21:57] en**
Hey, random question.
**[21:59] en**
Which part do you guys wash first?
**[22:02] atsu**
My neck, I guess?
**[22:03] yumoto**
My arms!
**[22:04] ryuu**
Armpits.
**[22:05] io**
The nape of the neck.
**[23:40] atsu**
That reminds me. When we
were in elementary school,
**[23:42] atsu**
we went to see a meteor shower.
**[23:44] atsu**
I wish we could be kids again.
**[23:46] atsu**
Wait, we *are* kids again!
**[23:48] atsu**
Could a monster be behind this?
**[23:50] atsu**
Next time: Cute Little
Boys of Love and Youth.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth
**[23:53] atsu**
Love Making!
# 4 - Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:10] atsu**
Hey, there's one!
**[00:13] kusa**
There's another!
**[00:15] atsu**
Meteor showers are cool, huh?
**[00:17] kusa**
Yeah.
**[00:22] atsu**
Hey. My big sister said that
**[00:24] atsu**
if you make a wish three times
before a shooting star disappears,
**[00:28] atsu**
it'll come true.
**[00:30] kusa**
Isn't that just superstition?
**[00:31] atsu**
You think so?
**[00:33] atsu**
But my sister really believes it.
**[00:39] kusa**
What did you say?
**[00:45] kusa**
That's so childish.
**[00:46] atsu**
But I am a child.
**[00:52] atsu**
I thought you didn't believe it, Kin-chan.
**[00:54] kusa**
Just thought I'd try.
**[00:56] atsu**
What did you wish for?
**[00:59] kusa**
I wished for...
**[01:00] gero**
Kusatsu-san.
**[01:03] ari**
So this is where you were.
**[01:05] gero**
What are you doing here with all the lights out?
**[01:08] kusa**
Looking at the stars.
**[01:10] gero**
Stars?
**[01:11] kusa**
Yes. Shooting stars.
**[01:14] ari**
Shooting stars? Wishing on a star, eh?
**[01:17] ari**
I didn't know you were such a romantic, Kinshiro.
**[01:22] gero**
So, what did you wish for?
**[01:25] kusa**
I wished for...
**[01:28] kusa**
World domination, of course.
***SIGN*** Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth
**[03:09] yumoto**
Woosh, woosh, woosh!
**[03:10] wom**
S-Stop it! Stop it, stop it!
**[03:14] yumoto**
But you stink.
**[03:15] yumoto**
What's it called? Animal stink?
**[03:17] wom**
But washing me like this...
**[03:20] yumoto**
When you stink,
**[03:21] yumoto**
after I cuddle you, people tell me *I* stink!
**[03:26] wom**
I don't stink! You're the ones who—
**[03:29] yumoto**
Huh? We're the ones who stink?
**[03:34] yumoto**
What kind of stink?
**[03:34] wom**
Human...
**[03:36] yumoto**
Human stink?
**[03:37] wom**
Yes!
**[03:38] yumoto**
Oh, really?
**[03:40] yumoto**
Do wombats have a sharp sense of smell?
**[03:44] wom**
I just happen to resemble your Earth animal.
**[03:47] wom**
I am not an actual wombat!
**[03:51] yumoto**
Then what are you?
**[03:51] wom**
I am wfirocbx...
**[03:53] yumoto**
Wfiro...?
**[03:54] wom**
Xjudsu...
**[03:56] yumoto**
Huh? Ikuju...
**[03:58] yumoto**
Oh, whatever! Let's just go with Wom-san!
**[04:03] yumoto**
Don't run away!
**[04:04] wom**
Made it!
**[04:08] atsu**
Give it a break already, Yumoto.
**[04:10] atsu**
You're just like a child.
**[04:13] en**
Well, in Yumoto's case,
it's not just his behavior.
**[04:16] en**
He looks like a kid, too.
**[04:18] yumoto**
What's wrong with that?
That means I look young, right?
**[04:21] en**
Young? You've got to be kidding.
**[04:23] en**
We're in high school, you little kid.
**[04:25] yumoto**
Please stop calling me a kid.
**[04:28] atsu**
Okay, Yumoto-kun,
what's your dream for the future?
**[04:31] yumoto**
To be a superhero!
**[04:32] en**
See? A kid.
**[04:34] en**
Hey, everyone! There's a kid in here!
**[04:37] atsu**
Besides, we're already superheroes.
**[04:39] atsu**
Though we didn't ask to be...
**[04:41] yumoto**
Oh, that's right.
**[04:44] tawara**
Well, I will be taking my leave ahead of you.
**[04:48] yumoto**
Hey, I'm not done yet.
**[04:50] tawara**
Pardon.
**[04:52] io**
You're not just young.
You really are a child, Yumoto.
**[04:56] io**
Do you still pay the
child fare to ride the bus?
**[05:02] io**
I'm so jealous. You don't
have to spend as much money.
**[05:05] yumoto**
You got me, huh?
**[05:07] yumoto**
Just kidding!
**[05:08] io**
That's the kind of thing
that makes you a kid.
**[05:15] ryuu**
Anyway, you need more than
just youth on your side.
**[05:18] ryuu**
You need to channel that into appeal.
**[05:20] en**
If you ask me, I'd say you're
pretty childish yourself, Ryuu.
**[05:24] ryuu**
Oh, Yufuin-senpai, you don't know my true power.
**[05:28] en**
What true power?
**[05:29] ryuu**
From married women to
elementary school girls—
**[05:31] yumoto**
You can't beat me in video games!
**[05:33] io**
You be quiet!
**[05:36] yumoto**
Okay...
**[05:39] en**
If we were in the samurai ages,
**[05:42] en**
we would have had our coming of age
ceremony and be full-fledged adults by now.
**[05:45] en**
Your looks don't determine
whether you're actually young.
**[05:48] ryuu**
That's a senior for you. You're so mature.
**[05:51] en**
Senior?
**[05:52] atsu**
Well, senior can refer to an
older person or an upperclassman.
**[05:56] ryuu**
That's right, Senior-senpai.
**[05:59] en**
I feel like he just called me an old man.
**[06:02] en**
Does my face really look that old?
**[06:04] io**
It means that your appearance
and behavior are both mature.
**[06:07] atsu**
Being called mature is a compliment, right?
**[06:10] atsu**
That's why, in the samurai ages,
they'd shave off their forelocks
**[06:13] [SONG] atsu**
and make themselves intentionally bald.
***SIGN*** °This is his individual opinion about forelock-shaving.
**[06:15] [SONG] io**
Oh? Was that artificial baldness?
**[06:18] [SONG] atsu**
Yes, they thought being bald
made you look more adult.
**[06:21] yumoto**
So if I shaved myself bald,
people might not call me a kid?
**[06:24] io**
No, it would just look like a miso commercial.
**[06:27] yumoto**
What does that mean?
**[06:30] en**
Does my face look old?
**[06:32] atsu**
En-chan, are you really worried about that?
**[06:34] en**
Maybe so... Does my face look old?
**[06:39] ryuu**
Being young is a wonderful thing!
**[06:41] yumoto**
Me too! Me too!
**[06:48] io**
What is that?
**[06:50] io**
You don't understand at all.
**[06:55] en**
My inner calm reflects itself on my face.
**[07:00] atsu**
He's so worried about it.
**[07:11] yumoto**
I'm sorry, Mister. Were we being too loud?
**[07:17] atsu**
Hey, Yumoto.
**[07:18] en**
He's not an older man.
**[07:21] en**
He wasn't wearing his uniform,
**[07:24] en**
so I thought he was just some older guy, too.
**[07:26] en**
But I just now realized...
**[07:28] atsu**
He's a student at our high school.
**[07:31] atsu**
They call him "the guy with
the face of a 50-year-old."
***SIGN*** Igarao Oyaji
**[07:37] atsu**
Igarao Oyaji!
**[07:43] oyaji**
*Damn it. I'm not an old man.*
**[07:45] kid**
Sir, good morning.
**[07:46] oyaji**
* When I go to school,*
* they confuse me for a teacher.*
**[07:48] kid**
Go ahead!
**[07:49] oyaji**
* When I ride the train,*
* people give up their seats for me.*
**[07:51] kid**
What's with that old guy?
**[07:52] oyaji**
* I didn't choose to be born*
* with a face like this.*
**[07:55] oyaji**
I want to enjoy my youth like
a high school student, too.
**[07:59] oyaji**
I'm not an old man. I'm not an old man.
**[08:02] oyaji**
I'm not an old man!
**[08:07] ari**
He's our next target, eh?
**[08:10] gero**
I see. I feel powerful dark energy from him.
**[08:14] kusa**
His age complex will likely create
a powerful negative field.
**[08:21] zun**
Then let us go.
**[08:23] kusa**
Conquest!
**[08:26] trio**
We are the rulers of this blue world...
**[08:29] trio**
Caerula Adamas!
**[08:31] zun**
Now, release the Zundar Needle!
**[08:36] trio**
Donum!
**[09:01] yumoto**
Good morning, Gora!
**[09:03] gora**
Oh, you're up early, Yumoto.
**[09:04] yumoto**
Yeah, I've got club stuff.
**[09:07] gora**
You do club stuff? Morning training?
**[09:10] yumoto**
Morning cuddles!
**[09:12] gora**
Morning *cuddles*?
**[09:13] yumoto**
Yeah, morning cuddles.
**[09:15] yumoto**
Thanks for the lunch, as usual!
**[09:17] gora**
Sorry it's rice balls again.
**[09:19] yumoto**
Nah, your rice balls are
the best in the world!
**[09:34] yumoto**
Woosh, woosh, woosh!
**[09:37] atsu**
How long are you going to do that?
**[09:39] atsu**
I can't believe you don't get tired of it.
**[09:40] yumoto**
But it's fun.
**[09:43] io**
Why not put that effort into a part-time job?
**[09:46] io**
You could make a lot of money.
**[09:47] yumoto**
That's not fun.
**[09:49] ryuu**
Why not pick up girls?
**[09:51] yumoto**
No interest in that.
**[09:53] en**
Does my face really look that old?
**[09:55] atsu**
Hey, are you still stuck on that, En-chan?
**[09:57] en**
But that was the first time in my life
I've been told my face looks old.
**[10:01] en**
People had only described me
as "hot" or "gorgeous" before.
**[10:05] atsu**
I've never heard that...
**[10:07] io**
Isn't that normal for an 18-year-old boy?
**[10:10] io**
Isn't it people like Yumoto and
Ryuu who are the exception?
**[10:13] ryuu**
Don't lump me in with Yumoto.
**[10:15] ryuu**
I'm cute! He's a kid.
**[10:18] yumoto**
You called?
**[10:22] atsu**
No, no. That's not true.
**[10:24] atsu**
Having a face that looks old
is like, for example,
**[10:26] atsu**
the husband in that anime who has
a coworker with really prominent lips,
**[10:30] atsu**
but it turns out he's really 27.
**[10:32] en**
Why are you talking about a nationally
famous anime all of a sudden?
**[10:36] en**
Why are you associating me,
an 18-year-old, with that character who's 27?
**[10:40] atsu**
Well, um, um...
**[10:43] atsu**
The savior of the century's end
with seven stars on his chest,
**[10:45] atsu**
the cynical #2 of the Science Ninja Team,
**[10:49] atsu**
and the protagonist's dark-skinned friend
**[10:50] atsu**
voiced by Iizuka Shouzou
in that robot war story
**[10:52] atsu**
are all 18, too.
**[10:54] atsu**
But you look much younger than them!
**[10:56] en**
Why is this turning into even
more of an anime superfan discussion?
**[10:59] en**
And why is Iizuka Shouzou-san
the only person you named outright?
**[11:03] ryuu**
What are they talking about?
**[11:05] io**
No idea.
**[11:06] yumoto**
I like unagi more than anago!
**[11:09] wombat**
Now's my chance!
**[11:15] yumoto**
Hey, wait!
***SIGN*** Zaou Ryuu
Born March 13th
Blood Type B / Pisces
Hobby: Snowboarding
Likes: Girls, cherries
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[11:38] yumoto**
Woosh, woosh, woosh!
**[11:40] yumoto**
Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
**[11:42] en**
Stop it, Yumoto! What are you doing?
**[11:44] yumoto**
Well, Wom-san ran away, so...
**[11:48] en**
Cut it out! Why me, then?
**[11:49] atsu**
He really is a kid.
**[11:50] io**
Such an unproductive endeavor
won't earn you a single yen, you know.
**[11:54] ryuu**
There's nothing fun about
two men fooling around.
**[11:58] yumoto**
Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
**[12:00] atsu**
What is this?
**[12:02] atsu**
I'm getting an irresistible urge to tickle En-chan.
**[12:08] yumoto**
Woosh, woosh, woosh!
**[12:09] en**
Why you now?
**[12:11] atsu**
Well, it just looked so fun! Woosh, woosh!
**[12:14] io**
Senpai, what are you doing?
**[12:16] io**
Actually, I want to do it, too!
**[12:19] io**
Woosh, woosh, woosh!
**[12:19] ryuu**
What are you doing, Io?
**[12:22] ryuu**
Damn! I'm getting revenge!
**[12:25] en**
Then I'll get revenge, too!
**[12:28] atsu**
Turning the tables is no fair!
**[12:37] yumoto**
Hey, doesn't something seem weird?
**[12:39] en**
Like what?
**[12:40] atsu**
Now that you mention it, why are we
acting like elementary schoolers?
**[12:43] io**
I just got the urge to do it.
**[12:46] yumoto**
It's almost like we've turned
into elementary schoolers.
**[12:49] yumoto**
Yeah, 'cause we *have* turned
into elementary schoolers!
**[12:53] all**
What's going on here?!
**[12:55] wombat**
Terrible news! An enemy's appeared!
**[13:03] en**
Wh-What's all this?
**[13:09] atsu**
What's going on?
**[13:11] io**
The students have all become children.
**[13:14] ryuu**
Darn it! I had a date after this!
**[13:16] en**
*That's* what bothers you?
**[13:17] yumoto**
Yay! Yay! This is kinda fun!
**[13:20] en**
He's the only one who doesn't
seem to have changed much.
**[13:23] all**
Yeah.
**[13:24] en**
You think this is the
work of an enemy monster?
**[13:27] yumoto**
Hey! Look at that!
**[13:38] monster**
Become young again! Become young again!
**[13:44] en**
Is that monster's power
turning everyone into children?
**[13:47] wombat**
Everyone! Time for Love Making!
**[13:49] all**
Right!
**[13:50] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[13:54] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[13:56] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[13:58] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[13:59] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[14:01] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[14:02] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[14:05] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[14:06] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[14:08] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[14:10] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[14:12] yumoto**
We are...
**[14:13] yumoto**
Wait, what's up with this?!
**[14:16] atsu**
That's weird. Why's it so baggy?
**[14:19] en**
Our other clothes changed to child sizes.
**[14:22] io**
This setup is lacking consistency.
**[14:24] ryu**
And I really liked my costume, too.
**[14:28] io**
You like that thing?
**[14:31] monster**
Who are you people?
**[14:34] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[14:37] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[14:40] io**
Love is all!
**[14:41] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[14:44] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[14:47] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[14:49] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[14:52] five**
Of love!
**[14:55] yumoto**
You monster! We're gonna fight you!
**[14:58] monster**
Battle Lovers? We'll see about that.
**[15:01] yumoto**
What was that?
**[15:03] yumoto**
Take this!
**[15:04] yumoto**
Scarlet Lumiere!
**[15:09] yumoto**
Huh? Why?
**[15:10] atsu**
Has our power been halved
because we're children?
**[15:14] io**
It's the child rate?
**[15:16] monster**
Then allow me to take the lead.
**[15:38] monster**
What's wrong, Battle Lovers?
**[15:40] monster**
These baggy clothes are hard to move in.
**[15:42] ryuu**
Damn.
**[15:44] ryuu**
I hate looking so uncool.
**[15:46] io**
*That's* what bothers you?
**[15:49] monster**
How unsightly.
**[15:51] yumoto**
Damn it...
**[15:53] monster**
Fall to ruin, Battle Lovers!
**[16:02] atsu**
Hey, all we're doing is saying "wah!"
**[16:05] monster**
Fall to ruin! Fall to ruin, all of you!
**[16:08] monster**
This is your punishment for treating me
like an old man based on the way I look!
**[16:12] yumoto**
What did he say?
**[16:14] atsu**
Is it possible he's...
**[16:15] en**
"The guy with the face of a 50-year old"...
**[16:17] en**
Igarao Oyaji!
**[16:19] monster**
Don't call me by that nickname!
**[16:29] monster**
Then I'll make you even younger.
**[16:42] en**
What's going on?
**[16:44] atsu**
I can't move!
**[16:45] io**
It appears we've turned into
kindergarteners this time.
**[16:49] ryuu**
What was that?
**[16:51] monster**
You literally can't raise a hand against me.
**[16:54] yumoto**
Darn you, darn you, darn you.
**[16:56] yumoto**
Oh, it undid our transformation.
**[16:59] en**
Undid? Or disrobed?
**[17:02] atsu**
"Disrobed our transformation"
doesn't sound right for the genre.
**[17:06] io**
This is very embarrassing.
**[17:09] ryuu**
I'm not embarrassed, but I won't
forgive you for making *that* smaller.
**[17:14] monster**
At this stage, you're effectively babies.
**[17:16] monster**
No, you *are* babies.
**[17:19] monster**
Then I'll send you to hell,
as easy as taking candy from a baby!
**[17:27] en**
Damn... At this rate...
**[17:29] atsu**
Are we done for?
**[17:33] io**
If I'd known this was going to happen,
I would have spent all my savings.
**[17:37] ryuu**
The women of the world will lament this.
**[17:44] yumoto**
Wait a minute.
**[17:46] en**
What is it at a time like this?
**[17:48] yumoto**
Something's weird.
**[17:49] atsu**
Weird?
**[17:50] yumoto**
The setup here is that everyone's turning
young because of him, right?
**[17:54] io**
That's right. So?
**[17:56] yumoto**
Then it really is weird.
**[17:58] ryuu**
*What's* weird?
**[18:00] yumoto**
Well, if that's the old man high school student,
**[18:03] yumoto**
he wouldn't look like that,
even if he turned young.
**[18:07] ryuu**
I get it. Even young,
someone who's ugly is still ugly.
**[18:11] en**
He'd never become a pretty young boy.
**[18:14] atsu**
Which means this is...
**[18:15] yumoto**
An illusion!
**[18:17] monster**
Oh, no!
**[18:20] yumoto**
Now!
**[18:31] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[18:37] monster**
What?!
**[18:51] yumoto**
You're not really an old man.
**[18:54] yumoto**
You're an 18-year-old high school student.
**[18:57] yumoto**
Isn't it the resentment you feel that's
really turning you into an old man?
**[19:03] atsu**
That all sounds impressive,
but it's not really fixing anything.
**[19:07] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[19:16] monster**
What is this strange sensation?
**[19:19] monster**
Comfort... healing...
**[19:21] monster**
I see... So this is love.
**[19:29] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[19:31] io**
We're back to normal!
**[19:37] yumoto**
Well, let's all put this
behind us and have a bath!
**[19:41] yumoto**
We're naked anyway!
**[19:42] en**
Speaking of which, where'd our clothes go?
**[19:44] yumoto**
Let's go!
**[19:48] ari**
Accursed Battle Lovers.
**[19:51] gero**
They foiled us yet again.
**[19:53] zun**
It appears we failed once more.
**[19:56] kusa**
Lord Zundar, I am sorry.
**[19:59] zun**
No matter.
**[20:01] zun**
Let them bask in their overconfidence for now.
**[20:05] kusa**
Next time, I swear...
**[20:07] zun**
I'll be counting on you.
**[20:09] kusa**
Sir.
**[20:10] ari**
But I thought this plan to turn the enemy
into elementary schoolers to seal their power
**[20:15] ari**
would work out well.
**[20:18] kusa**
Elementary schoolers, huh?
**[20:20] gero**
Is something wrong?
**[20:22] kusa**
No... It's nothing.
**[20:26] kusa**
Just remembering something from long ago.
**[20:33] yumoto**
Woosh, woosh, woosh!
**[20:36] en**
Enough of that, Yumoto.
**[20:38] en**
He really is a kid.
**[20:40] atsu**
Well, he's the only one who didn't change
at all when the enemy made us young.
**[20:44] en**
No matter how young you
make the kid, a kid is still a kid.
**[20:52] ryuu**
Oh, no!
**[20:53] io**
Don't worry. The shield function made
it so he wouldn't recognize our faces.
**[20:56] ryuu**
Oh, that's right.
**[21:03] atsu**
You seem to be in a good mood.
**[21:05] en**
Did something good happen to you?
**[21:08] oyaji**
Well, actually, I got a girlfriend.
**[21:13] ryuu**
Oh, does she like older men?
**[21:14] io**
Hey!
**[21:15] oyaji**
That's right.
**[21:17] oyaji**
She says they're wonderfully reliable.
**[21:22] oyaji**
She said she made a wish on
a star to meet a wonderful man.
**[21:28] io**
I see...
**[21:30] atsu**
You heard him.
**[21:31] en**
Why are you telling me that?
**[21:32] ryuu**
I'm glad to hear it,
though it's also kind of annoying.
**[21:36] oyaji**
Yes!
**[21:39] en**
What is it?
**[21:40] atsu**
He reminded me that I made a wish
on a shooting star when I was little.
**[21:44] en**
What was it?
**[21:45] atsu**
To be a superhero.
**[21:47] en**
Just like a kid.
**[21:49] atsu**
Well, I was a kid.
**[21:51] en**
You can't say anything about Yumoto.
**[21:54] atsu**
That reminds me.
**[21:55] atsu**
What did he wish for then, I wonder?
**[21:59] yumoto**
Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
**[22:02] wombat**
Please stop...
**[22:07] wombat**
Ma-Ma-Macho...
**[23:40] ryuu**
For some reason, the Press Society guys
are hanging around the Defense Club.
**[23:44] ryuu**
They muscle in on my calls to girls.
It's beyond annoying!
**[23:48] ryuu**
Remote control? I'll buy you one of those!
**[23:50] ryuu**
Next time: To Steal Love Without Regret.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** To Steal Love Without Regret
**[23:52] ryuu**
Love Making!
# 5 - To Steal Love Without Regret
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] kino**
There's a mysterious cosplay group
causing a ruckus around the school lately...
**[00:08] kino**
Their identities aren't visible
to the naked eye or in pictures.
**[00:13] kino**
This could be interesting material.
***SIGN*** To Steal Love Without Regret
**[02:08] en**
Raining again today?
**[02:11] atsu**
It is the rainy season, after all.
**[02:13] en**
It's hard to be enthusiastic when it's raining.
**[02:16] atsu**
About what?
**[02:17] en**
Active and aggressive things.
**[02:20] atsu**
In all the time I've known you,
**[02:22] atsu**
I've never seen you do anything
active and aggressive.
**[02:26] en**
Really?
**[02:27] atsu**
The Yufuin En I know is
always passive and defensive.
**[02:31] en**
That's my Atsushi.
He's got the English skills.
**[02:35] io**
Apparently, "naïve" and "sensitive"
**[02:37] io**
are not considered compliments
in the English-speaking world.
**[02:40] ryuu**
People say stuff like
"a naïve young man," though.
**[02:42] atsu**
Over there, that means "a careless young man."
**[02:46] io**
Exactly!
**[02:48] ryuu**
Why are you looking at me?
**[02:50] io**
It just seemed appropriate.
**[02:51] ryuu**
Io, I am not a careless young man.
**[02:55] ryuu**
I am a guileless young man.
**[02:57] io**
You have a wonderfully high opinion of yourself.
**[03:01] en**
Totally losing my motivation...
**[03:02] atsu**
I'm telling you, you never had any.
**[03:10] en**
Yumoto?
**[03:13] atsu**
Were your pupils dilated just now?
**[03:16] yumoto**
Something about touching Wom-san
takes me closer to Nirvana.
**[03:22] en**
Like Linus's blanket?
**[03:24] atsu**
Oh, yeah, like a feeling of security?
**[03:26] yumoto**
It's a little different from security.
**[03:29] en**
Then what is it?
**[03:30] yumoto**
What, indeed?
**[03:32] en**
You're asking me?
**[03:33] wom**
I say "no thank you" to being cuddled for no reason!
**[03:36] yumoto**
Don't say that!
**[03:37] yumoto**
Unhand me, you!
**[03:39] wom**
Let me cuddle you!
**[03:41] wom**
Day after day after day,
you've cuddled me so much,
**[03:44] wom**
the fur around my stomach is thinning out!
**[03:47] yumoto**
Then I'll do your back from now on!
**[03:49] wom**
That is not the issue!
**[03:52] io**
Does it absolutely have to be Wombat?
**[03:54] io**
Could it be something else?
**[03:55] yumoto**
Hmm! Good question!
**[03:58] yumoto**
Something about his cuddliness
is just right to me.
**[04:02] yumoto**
Gives me that "feel so fine" feeling!
**[04:04] io**
What if he were some other kind of fluffy?
**[04:06] yumoto**
I'd consider it.
**[04:08] io**
Floofy?
**[04:09] yumoto**
Absolutely!
**[04:11] io**
Fuzzy?
**[04:12] yumoto**
That would be fine.
**[04:13] io**
Like that over there?
**[04:15] yumoto**
Oh, that's good!
**[04:18] yumoto**
Wait, that's...
**[04:21] trio**
Mr. Tawarayama!
**[04:23] ryuu**
What is all this?
**[04:24] atsu**
Mold? Is it mold? It's mold!
**[04:26] en**
Hey, hey, hey!
**[04:28] en**
Cut it out!
**[04:30] ryuu**
Wombat, what happened
to your advanced science?
**[04:33] wombat**
I'm sorry!
**[04:34] wombat**
The high temperature and humidity lately
**[04:37] wombat**
have created favorable
conditions for mold growth!
**[04:39] io**
"Favorable"? It's utterly putrid.
**[04:42] wom**
It's fine! Get rid of the mold and
the main body will still be fine!
**[04:47] io**
The hyphae of mold go down
deeper than you'd think.
**[04:50] yumoto**
One time, I picked the mold off some
bread and ate it, and I got sick!
**[04:53] ryuu**
Are you stupid?
**[04:54] yumoto**
I was hungry!
**[04:56] atsu**
Anyway, it's bad that he's growing mold, isn't it?
**[04:59] yumoto**
Let's wash him! Let's wash him!
**[05:00] yumoto**
Everything turns out okay after a washing!
**[05:05] yumoto**
What's this? What color is this?
**[05:07] atsu**
Wombat, you have to be more
careful with Mr. Tawarayama.
**[05:11] en**
Yeah, there's no love in this.
**[05:13] wombat**
You say that I, who came here to fill
the Earth with love, have no love?!
**[05:17] ryuu**
Nope, none.
**[05:18] io**
Crude in every way.
**[05:19] yumoto**
Upsy-daisy!
**[05:23] en**
Hey. He fell.
**[05:25] yumoto**
There, it turned out okay!
**[05:27] four**
It did not!
**[05:28] ryuu**
If anyone saw this,
they'd say it was elder abuse!
**[05:31] io**
Assault, right?
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[05:32] yumoto**
He just looks that way because
he's wet. If we dry him off...
**[05:37] en**
I thought I just heard a knock.
**[05:40] ryuu**
But no one's ever visited us before.
**[05:43] atsu**
Either way, this situation clearly looks bad!
**[05:46] io**
All Hell's gonna break loose, yeah.
**[05:50] kino**
Pardon me!
**[05:53] yumoto**
Man, he sure is persistent!
**[05:55] en**
Hey!
**[05:58] yumoto**
Who's there? What do you want?
**[06:00] kino**
Oh, how rude of me.
**[06:02] kino**
I am Kinosaki of the PS.
**[06:05] yumoto**
PS?
**[06:07] kino**
The Press Society.
**[06:09] kino**
This is my photographer, Tazawa.
**[06:11] taz**
Hey.
***SIGN*** Binan High School
Press Society
Kinosaki Kou
**[06:12] kino**
A pleasure to make your acquaintance.
**[06:14] atsu**
And what do two members of
the Press Society want with us?
**[06:17] kino**
How rude of me.
**[06:18] kino**
The truth is, I publish online articles
for the Binan High School Press Society
**[06:22] kino**
about daily life on campus.
**[06:27] atsu**
Online?
**[06:28] kino**
The other day at a meeting,
I proposed a new project:
**[06:31] kino**
could we make a theme out of the
"bonds" between distinctive teachers
**[06:34] kino**
and the students around them?
**[06:37] kino**
I call it "Beloved Teachers"!
**[06:40] kino**
Well? Don't you think it's a great project?
**[06:43] all**
Yeah...
**[06:44] kino**
Thank you for the words of praise.
**[06:47] kino**
A flower of compassion blooming
quietly in the wild concrete jungle...
**[06:51] kino**
The bond between student and
teacher is the most precious of all!
**[06:55] kino**
"My teacher!" "My class!"
**[06:57] kino**
Souls crying out to each other!
**[06:59] kino**
A miraculous meeting!
**[07:00] yumoto**
This guy's weird.
**[07:02] en**
You're one to talk.
**[07:04] kino**
Don't let it worry you.
**[07:05] kino**
The press is often misunderstood.
**[07:08] kino**
But to root out the truth and
convey it in elaborate, minute detail...
**[07:14] kino**
I believe that is our mission.
**[07:19] ryuu**
Hey, what are you doing?
**[07:20] io**
I refuse to have my picture taken.
**[07:22] kino**
No, I just received your consent to be covered.
**[07:26] kino**
I thought we'd get started right away.
**[07:28] ryuu**
Covered?
**[07:29] io**
Consent?
**[07:30] atsu**
Who gave it?
**[07:31] kino**
Oh, honestly!
**[07:32] kino**
Right now, you just said it
was a good project, didn't you?
**[07:36] kino**
Now, let's get right to the
interview wth Mr. Tawarayama!
**[07:41] kino**
Mr. Tawarayama, from all that I've just seen,
**[07:45] kino**
you seem to enjoy a very frank
relationship with your students.
**[07:49] en**
What you've just seen?
**[07:50] kino**
Yes.
**[07:51] kino**
I was below when I caught sight of
the fun you were having by the window.
**[07:57] kino**
Mr. Tawarayama, you seem truly
energetic for a man of your age.
**[08:02] kino**
Please, tell us the secret of
your health and agile movements.
**[08:08] kino**
Mr. Tawarayama?
**[08:10] en**
We decline this interview.
**[08:13] atsu**
We're a boring club.
No one's going to find it interesting.
**[08:15] kino**
No, no.
**[08:16] kino**
It is the users who will determine
what's interesting and what's not.
**[08:20] io**
Please leave.
**[08:22] ryuu**
If you don't...
**[08:23] kino**
Um, you can refuse if you want to, but...
**[08:26] kino**
I have a little something
called freedom of the press.
**[08:29] kino**
So I'm going to gather material
without hesitation. Okay?
**[08:35] io**
It's a violation of our likeness usage rights.
**[08:38] io**
Nowadays, you have to be very careful
**[08:40] io**
about how you use personal information.
**[08:42] kino**
Yes. That's why I thought it would be
beneficial for you to use us, as well.
**[08:48] kino**
Let's make it a win-win situation!
**[08:54] wom**
*Oh, dear...*
**[09:00] kino**
Good morning, Yufuin-san!
**[09:02] kino**
It seems we're finally getting a bit of
a break from the rainy season, eh?
**[09:06] kino**
Are you feeling well, Yufuin-san?
**[09:09] kino**
Come to think of it,
I don't see Kinugawa-san around.
**[09:12] kino**
Are you all alone, Yufuin-san?
**[09:14] en**
Atsushi has day duty.
**[09:15] en**
So what do you want?
**[09:17] kino**
How rude of me.
**[09:19] kino**
I'm here for your morning
greeting and interview.
**[09:22] en**
Interview?
**[09:23] kino**
Yes. Yufuin En-san, what are your hobbies?
**[09:27] en**
Hobbies? None, really.
**[09:29] kino**
Special skills?
**[09:31] en**
Special skills? None, really.
**[09:32] kino**
He says he has no real skills.
**[09:35] en**
Uh, I don't like you putting it that way...
**[09:37] kino**
Favorite foods?
**[09:39] en**
Well, none really.
**[09:40] kino**
He has no favorite foods.
**[09:41] en**
Look, I told you...
**[09:42] kino**
You're not giving me much of an interview.
**[09:45] en**
Well, you can't just ask me
this stuff out of the blue.
**[09:48] en**
Give me some questions
that are easier to answer.
**[09:51] kino**
Questions that are easier to answer?
**[09:53] kino**
Let me see...
**[09:55] kino**
If you suddenly became a superhero
tasked with protecting the Earth,
**[09:58] kino**
what would you do?
**[10:01] kino**
Well, it's a purely hypothetical question.
**[10:03] kino**
What would you do if something
like that were to happen?
**[10:08] kino**
Are you the type that would find
it bothersome? Or would you...
**[10:14] kino**
That pose... Discomfort? Despair?!
**[10:17] io**
It's the rage, fury, and indignation
over a failed FX transaction!
**[10:21] ryuu**
You're so stupid.
**[10:23] ryuu**
Don't cry. I hate women who cry.
**[10:26] kino**
Even if he became a superhero,
he'd hate women who cry, he says.
**[10:30] ryuu**
I can buy you a remote control, at least.
**[10:32] ryuu**
Huh? Are remote controls that expensive?
**[10:35] ryuu**
Then just do it by hand.
**[10:38] kino**
It's tough when you can't
change from hot air to cold.
**[10:42] ryuu**
Why can't you just put it
on an automatic setting?
**[10:44] kino**
Carefully adjusting your settings is better
for the environment, don't you think?
**[10:48] ryuu**
Shut up!
**[10:50] ryuu**
Hello? Hello?
**[10:53] kino**
Your defense of romance failed, I see.
**[10:55] ryuu**
Save it!
**[10:57] atsu**
What is that?
**[10:59] atsu**
Like part of a "ten questions" thing?
**[11:01] kino**
No, no. Nothing so sophisticated.
**[11:04] atsu**
Good point. That would
make a boring question.
**[11:08] kino**
Oh, you got one on me there.
**[11:15] yumoto**
I can't eat any more...
**[11:21] wom**
Huh?
**[11:22] tawara**
Just ten more minutes...
**[11:25] wom**
What, what?
**[11:36] maru**
I am a puppet under my father's control.
***SIGN*** Sousa Enkaku
**[11:39] maru**
I can only follow the rails he's laid for me.
**[11:41] aur**
Is that so?
**[11:47] aur**
Then perhaps it's time you did the controlling.
***SIGN*** Io Naruko
Born December 17th
Blood Type A / Capricorn
Hobbies: Financial investment and management
Likes: Money, beef bowls
**[12:02] en**
They're... Or, I should say *he*'s annoying.
**[12:05] io**
He's awful. In the last two days,
I've suffered a loss of 1.8 million.
**[12:09] ryuu**
I wish he'd disappear. Just turn to dust.
**[12:12] wom**
Really!
**[12:13] wom**
With those two hanging around,
I can't act freely at all!
**[12:18] wom**
I have to stay close to that
individual, and I can't even talk!
**[12:22] wom**
I'm so restricted! I feel so trapped!
**[12:25] wom**
You may as well call it oppression!
We must do something at once!
**[12:30] atsu**
Isn't this reaping what you sow?
**[12:32] yumoto**
It's okay. I'll cuddle you in exchange.
**[12:35] wom**
That ain't the point!
**[12:36] yumoto**
They didn't come see me for an interview.
**[12:39] yumoto**
I would've answered, too.
**[12:41] wom**
You were just sleepin' like a baby!
**[12:43] ryuu**
I've never seen Wombat so pissed off.
**[12:46] io**
When he gets pissed off,
he talks with a Kansai accent, then?
**[12:49] atsu**
It's fine to rant, but please don't
leave Mr. Tawarayama like that.
**[12:53] ryuu**
Really, you keep cooling
him off and heating him up...
**[12:56] wom**
What are you sayin'?
**[12:57] wom**
An hour or two away from him ain't
gonna make a difference at this point!
**[13:01] yumoto**
Wombat's gone delinquent!
**[13:03] yumoto**
Hey, what's wrong with you—
**[13:05] wombat**
Don't touch me!
**[13:06] wombat**
Jackass! Your mama's got an outie!
**[13:08] ryuu**
The stress is causing Wombat
to resort to name calling!
**[13:12] io**
He's being pretty careless.
**[13:14] atsu**
Does that make him naïve?
**[13:18] kino**
Hello!
**[13:21] kino**
Is this what they call a "naked hang-out"?
**[13:24] kino**
The Kurotama Bath.
It's a fine location, isn't it?
**[13:27] kino**
We're going to take
advantage of it in a big way!
**[13:31] kino**
So the Defense Club is taking a
bath along with their pink pet.
**[13:35] kino**
How nice! Talk about a fine picture!
**[13:37] kino**
And Mr. Tawarayama has a very
distinctive bathing style.
**[13:47] atsu**
Excuse me, Kinosaki-san.
**[13:48] atsu**
This is a private gathering.
Could you please refrain from doing this?
**[13:53] kino**
Oh, how rude of me.
**[13:54] kino**
Of course, whether you participate
or not is your own choice.
**[13:58] atsu**
Well, outsiders are not really... you know?
**[14:01] kino**
Oh? Does this place have a membership system?
**[14:04] atsu**
No, it's not that...
**[14:07] kino**
But Mr. Tawarayama sure can hold
his breath a long time, can't he?
**[14:15] en**
Seriously? At a time like this?
**[14:17] yumoto**
This is the usual Lovra—
**[14:20] kino**
Love? What was that? What was that?
**[14:22] atsu**
Um, well...
**[14:24] en**
Mr. Tawarayama's spent
too long in the hot water.
**[14:27] en**
Why don't we cool him down a while?
**[14:28] both**
Yes, yes, let's do that.
**[14:30] kino**
Ah, but...
**[14:32] both**
C'mon, Mr. Tawarayama!
**[14:33] ---**
You don't want to get dizzy.
**[14:33] ---**
Let's take a break over there.
**[14:37] atsu**
We'll be back soon.
**[14:39] en**
Please, enjoy the bath, you two.
**[14:42] wom**
Hurry! Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
**[14:46] atsu**
Calm down, Wombat.
**[14:48] en**
There's no way we can transform here.
**[14:50] wom**
But while we're standing here,
love is, love was, love will be...
**[14:55] en**
If we transform now, they'll find us out.
**[14:57] atsu**
I bet he's already suspicious of us.
**[14:59] yumoto**
Would it be bad if they found out?
**[15:01] ryuu**
Of course.
**[15:02] io**
If they find out...
**[15:03] kino**
What's with those outfits?
**[15:05] kino**
Is there a point to the big speeches?
**[15:08] kino**
How does it feel?
**[15:09] kino**
You guys!
**[15:11] en**
No way.
**[15:15] ryuu**
That hurts, darn it!
**[15:17] io**
Can't we turn these things off?
**[15:19] wom**
It won't stop until you end
it with the Love Shower!
**[15:22] en**
This sucks.
**[15:23] atsu**
If we don't hurry, they'll finish their bath!
**[15:26] yumoto**
We'll just have to kill him.
**[15:27] all**
Huh?
**[15:28] atsu**
Who?
**[15:29] yumoto**
Mr. Tawarayama. He'll have to die for us!
**[15:34] all**
Oh...
**[15:35] all**
No way!
**[15:37] ryuu**
How frightening!
**[15:38] io**
Isn't that a little out of date?
**[15:41] yumoto**
Now, now. Just hear me out.
**[15:44] kino**
What are they talking about?
**[15:48] kino**
What happened?
**[15:50] yumoto**
Mr. Tawarayama...
**[15:51] yumoto**
Mr. Tawarayama isn't breathing!
**[15:56] yumoto**
Look, Kinosaki-san!
**[15:58] yumoto**
See? He's not breathing, right?
And his pupils are dilated!
**[16:03] yumoto**
Go on! Check and make sure!
**[16:06] yumoto**
Do it! It's the press's job to get to the truth!
**[16:10] kino**
Th-That is true...
**[16:12] kino**
Y-You're right. It's not beating.
**[16:14] yumoto**
This is awful!
**[16:17] atsu**
So, we're going to go call a doctor!
**[16:20] atsu**
Please stay with Mr. Tawarayama until then!
**[16:24] atsu**
Let's go, Defense Club!
**[16:26] atsu**
Let's defend Mr. Tawarayama's life and health!
**[16:29] four**
Yeah!
**[16:30] kino**
Hey, wai—
**[16:34] kino**
Hey! Go after them!
**[16:35] taz**
But we're naked.
**[16:37] kino**
They're naked, too!
**[16:43] wom**
Now!
**[16:44] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[16:49] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[16:51] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[16:54] io**
Love is all!
**[16:55] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[16:58] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[17:00] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[17:02] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[17:04] five**
Of love!
**[17:08] ryuu**
Oh, come on!
**[17:09] ryuu**
We don't need to do the introduction
if we're transforming in secret!
**[17:11] io**
Besides, we don't have time!
**[17:13] wom**
It's a matter of feeling and etiquette!
**[17:15] wom**
Let's go!
**[17:21] boy**
There!
**[17:29] boy**
It's hot.
**[17:30] boy**
What is this?
**[17:33] boy**
The air conditioner! And it's hot air!
**[17:35] boy**
Who hit the heater button?
**[17:40] monster**
Touching the control panel directly...
**[17:42] monster**
You hate that minor task so much,
you invented the remote control to avoid it.
**[17:48] monster**
But in exchange for that slight saving of time,
**[17:51] monster**
you also invite a great threat...
**[17:54] monster**
Air conditioners that can't cool in the summer!
**[17:57] monster**
Video games that can't get
past the title screen!
**[17:59] monster**
Bidet toilets that won't
stop washing your butthole!
**[18:02] monster**
TVs locked forever on TV Tokyo!
**[18:07] monster**
Now, let's make things a little warmer!
**[18:12] boys**
It's hot...
**[18:13] boys**
So hot...
**[18:19] yumoto**
Battle Lover Kick!
**[18:26] yumoto**
You are really, really,
really, really long-winded!
**[18:28] yumoto**
We're in a hurry, you know!
**[18:30] yumoto**
If you don't have a remote control,
just pull the plug and consider from there!
**[18:34] ryuu**
That was fast.
**[18:35] en**
One hit?
**[18:36] atsu**
It's like there was no
reason for us to be here.
**[18:38] io**
Seriously.
**[18:39] yumoto**
Okay! Let's finish this quick!
**[18:42] monster**
I don't think so!
**[18:46] four**
He stopped!
**[18:50] monster**
Did you forget I'm the
Remote Control Monster?
**[18:55] yumoto**
My body's moving on its own!
**[18:57] monster**
You are but a puppet that moves
as my remote control dictates!
**[19:06] ---**
Gulp!
**[19:07] monster**
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
**[19:13] monster**
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
**[19:17] wombat**
Shut up!
**[19:19] yumoto**
Now!
**[19:20] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[19:29] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[19:37] monster**
So I was also a mere puppet under their control?
**[19:42] monster**
From now on, I should follow my own will...
**[19:49] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[19:51] atsu**
I'm so done objecting to that.
**[19:53] en**
Hey, this is Sousa Enkaku from class 3-B.
**[19:56] atsu**
So the monsters are being
controlled by someone?
**[20:00] ryuu**
Who could it be?
**[20:01] io**
Hey! We have to get back, quick!
**[20:03] yumoto**
Oh, no!
**[20:08] kino**
What should we do?
**[20:10] taz**
For the time being...
**[20:17] yumoto**
Mr. Tawarayama! Have you come to?
**[20:21] yumoto**
How do you feel?
**[20:22] tawara**
Ah, hello, my friends. I feel fine.
**[20:26] yumoto**
That is a fine thing to hear.
**[20:28] ryuu**
Why are they talking like
they're in a period drama?
**[20:30] io**
Who knows?
**[20:31] yumoto**
Mr. Tawaramura, this is
Kinosaki-san and Tazawa-san,
**[20:35] yumoto**
who took care of you while you were out.
**[20:38] tawara**
So you are my Florence Nightengales?
**[20:41] kino**
N-No...
**[20:43] en**
We fooled them completely... I guess?
**[20:45] atsu**
I dunno.
**[20:46] yumoto**
I know! A picture! Let's take a picture!
**[20:49] yumoto**
Gora! Come here a minute!
**[20:52] gora**
What is it, Yumoto?
**[20:54] kino**
*The Village of the Eight Tombs*!
**[20:55] yumoto**
Take our picture for us!
**[20:58] gora**
Sure.
**[20:59] yumoto**
Let us borrow that.
**[21:01] gora**
Okay, I'm taking it.
**[21:02] yumoto**
Go for it!
**[21:03] gora**
One, two... snap!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club Defending the Teacher
**[21:11] kusa**
What is this?
**[21:13] ari**
"The heartwarming bonds that
unite the teachers and students
**[21:16] ari**
of Binan High School," apparently.
**[21:18] kusa**
What nonsense.
**[21:20] kusa**
And why are they dressed like this?
**[21:22] kusa**
It's the height of vulgarity.
**[21:24] gero**
Although it seems to have
gotten quite a reaction.
**[21:27] kusa**
A reaction?
**[21:28] gero**
Yes, along with words of praise
from the neighborhood.
**[21:34] ari**
What shall we do, Kinshiro?
**[21:37] ari**
We'll have to accept their
club application sooner or later.
***SIGN*** By order of the
Binan High School
Student Council
**[21:47] gero**
Oh, it's upside down.
**[21:50] kino**
Our direct report
**[21:52] kino**
went pretty well for the first stage, didn't it?
**[22:01] kino**
Right?
**[23:40] io**
If we get bad grades on our finals,
the Defense Club will be disbanded?!
**[23:44] io**
And the student council is
offering me a position as treasurer?
**[23:48] io**
Sure thing, if you pay me!
**[23:50] io**
Next time: Love is Something
You Wear on Your Back.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love is Something You Wear on Your Back
**[23:53] io**
Love Making!
# 6 - Love is Something You Wear on Your Back
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Salmon Vegetables Hamburg Steak
**[00:07] yumoto**
Food! Food!
**[00:09] en**
Yumoto, this is already your third meal of the day.
**[00:12] yumoto**
I just get so hungry after a cuddle!
**[00:16] yumoto**
Hey, I'll take this!
**[00:18] atsu**
Being young is an amazing thing.
**[00:20] en**
In his case, I don't think it has
anything to do with being young.
**[00:24] gero**
In my case,
**[00:25] gero**
eating without a tablecloth on the table
always cuts my appetite in half, but...
**[00:30] gero**
President, Vice President,
what about you two?
**[00:33] kusa**
I've heard that in Europe during the Middle Ages,
**[00:36] kusa**
they used the tablecloth to wipe their mouths.
**[00:39] kusa**
I'm grateful that they changed
that to individual napkins.
**[00:43] ari**
Speaking of which,
**[00:44] ari**
it's a shame the cafeteria has
no finger bowls, don't you think?
**[00:46] gero**
Oh, that's true.
**[00:48] kusa**
Let's see if we can find room
for it in the Student Council funds.
**[00:52] yumoto**
Box lunch! Box lunch! It makes me so happy!
**[00:56] yumoto**
Box lunch! Box lunch! Steamy hot!
**[01:00] yumoto**
You gotta eat it while it's still warm!
**[01:02] kusa**
The existence of such base and vulgar
individuals here at Binan High School
**[01:07] kusa**
absolutely cannot be permitted.
**[01:08] gero**
In other words, you want to do something about
**[01:12] gero**
the members of that Earth Defense Club thing?
**[01:14] kusa**
You catch on quickly, Akoya.
***SIGN*** Love is Something You Wear on Your Back
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[02:54] wom**
Oh, my...
**[02:59] yumoto**
An afternoon cuddle after lunch
makes me feel so much better!
**[03:01] wom**
Everyone!
**[03:03] wom**
Don't you think it's strange?
***SIGN*** Potato Chips
**[03:06] en**
What is?
**[03:07] atsu**
That we pretend we don't see the cuddling?
**[03:10] wom**
No! I mean the monsters!
**[03:12] yumoto**
Oh? Did another one show up?
**[03:14] wom**
Not that!
**[03:16] wom**
Don't you think it's strange?
**[03:18] wom**
They always seem to appear close to us.
**[03:22] en**
Now that you mention it...
**[03:23] atsu**
You think the enemy could
be closer than we thought?
**[03:26] io**
It's true, they do appear awfully
frequently within our area of activity.
**[03:30] ryuu**
Yeah, they seem to show up just
as we start talking about them.
**[03:37] gero**
Pardon me, Defense Club members.
**[03:41] gero**
What is that stench?
**[03:44] atsu**
Hey, Gero-kun. Can we help you?
**[03:53] gero**
The truth is, I came to inform you
**[03:55] gero**
that while your group has been approved as a club,
**[03:59] gero**
student council rule 132 states that
**[04:02] gero**
if the club members' final exam
scores do not meet the average,
**[04:06] gero**
your club will be dissolved.
**[04:08] atsu**
Huh? There's a rule like that?
**[04:11] gero**
It was just established.
**[04:14] gero**
Well, that's all I wanted to say.
**[04:17] gero**
That stench...
**[04:19] gero**
Is there a dead animal here?
**[04:24] en**
You've got the right idea.
**[04:28] atsu**
I-Is that all you wanted?
**[04:31] gero**
Yes. I'll be going, then.
**[04:35] ryuu**
What are you looking at?
**[04:36] gero**
Weren't you the one looking at me?
**[04:42] ryuu**
Doesn't that guy have the
wrong idea about something?
**[04:45] io**
Maybe he's interested in you, Ryuu?
**[04:47] ryuu**
Cut that out. It's gross.
**[04:50] gero**
What is this unpleasant sensation?
**[04:54] gero**
Really, I wish that club would just fall apart.
**[04:58] wom**
I cannot allow it!
**[04:59] wom**
The Earth Defense Club,
so full of love, must not be dissolved!
**[05:04] en**
But from their perspective,
we must seem pretty incomprehensible.
**[05:09] ryuu**
Well, that's true.
**[05:10] wom**
Even so, we must prevent
the club's dissolution!
**[05:13] yumoto**
You're so passionate!
Have your needs been building up?
**[05:16] atsu**
That's *you*.
**[05:18] wom**
Silence!
**[05:19] wom**
Listen, all of you!
**[05:21] wom**
You absolutely must see to it that
your test scores beat the average!
**[05:25] wom**
That is an order!
**[05:34] en**
Ryuu, do you think
you'll do okay on the finals?
**[05:37] ryuu**
Nah, probably not.
**[05:40] ryuu**
You've got it good, Kinugawa-senpai.
**[05:42] ryuu**
You always get top scores.
**[05:45] atsu**
Well, I suppose.
**[05:46] atsu**
But I can't get 100s like En-chan does.
**[05:50] ryuu**
Yufuin-senpai, you've
gotten perfect scores before?
**[05:52] en**
Yeah, when I successfully
guess the subject matter.
**[05:55] ryuu**
So if there's no need to worry about Io...
**[05:58] en**
I guess the real problem is Yumoto.
**[06:00] atsu**
Yumoto's an unknown quantity, huh?
**[06:02] ryuu**
An unknown quantity?
**[06:03] en**
I hear that in math, he can tell the
area of a shape just by looking at it.
**[06:07] ryuu**
Without any calculations?
**[06:09] en**
No calculation at all.
**[06:11] atsu**
He probably doesn't know
the equations, after all.
**[06:13] ryuu**
Wow.
**[06:15] atsu**
But since his way of thinking is so unique,
**[06:17] atsu**
in subjects like Japanese, he can easily get zeroes.
**[06:22] yumoto**
So, how's the bath?
**[06:24] en**
Yumoto, are you going to do okay on your tests?
**[06:27] yumoto**
I'm not motivated at all.
**[06:28] en**
Hey, hey.
**[06:30] yumoto**
After all, I'm inheriting the
family bath, so I don't need school!
**[06:35] gora**
Yumoto. You must not become a man like me.
**[06:39] gora**
A man good for nothing but chopping wood...
**[06:42] yumoto**
Big bro...
**[06:43] en**
Now, now. It's because
your brother chops the wood
**[06:46] en**
that we can enjoy the baths, after all.
**[06:49] atsu**
But isn't Kurotama Bath's selling point
that it runs off a free-flowing hot spring?
**[06:55] atsu**
So it shouldn't really need firewood, right?
**[06:58] ryuu**
Then what does he chop wood for?
**[07:01] yumoto**
Why do you, big bro?
**[07:07] yumoto**
I think the screws in my
brother's head might be loose.
**[07:10] en**
You're one to talk.
**[07:11] yumoto**
Hey. Speaking of screws, do you
know why they're called "screws"?
**[07:18] ryuu**
Because you screw them in?
**[07:19] yumoto**
Oh, I see!
**[07:21] yumoto**
They're screws because you screw them in.
**[07:23] en**
You mean that wasn't a quiz,
just a normal question?
**[07:25] yumoto**
That's amazing!
**[07:27] yumoto**
Ryuu-senpai, you're amazing!
**[07:30] yumoto**
The riddle I've been puzzling over
since third grade is solved!
**[07:32] yumoto**
Yay! Yay! I did it!
**[07:33] ryuu**
That's too long to puzzle over something! Look it up!
**[07:41] boy**
Naruko-senpai gets good grades
and he's rich. He's amazing.
**[07:45] boy**
He pretty much has no faults at all!
**[07:48] boy**
H-Hey.
**[07:57] itsu**
My name is Itsumo Ichiban.
***SIGN*** Itsumo Ichiban
**[07:59] itsu**
As my name implies, my grades are "always #1."
**[08:03] itsu**
But people still find me creepy because they say I sound dumb when I talk.
**[08:08] itsu**
I don't particularly care, though.
**[08:10] boy**
You know, Itsumo-senpai gets good grades,
**[08:13] boy**
but isn't the way he talks kinda odd?
**[08:14] boy**
I think he's got just one screw loose.
**[08:17] itsu**
What do you mean, "kinda odd"?
**[08:19] itsu**
If you think I'm creepy, just say I'm creepy.
**[08:21] itsu**
And why would you say "just one screw"?
**[08:24] itsu**
Why be so specific about that?
**[08:25] io**
He talks to himself an awful lot.
**[08:26] itsu**
Gets under my skin...
**[08:29] io**
Oh, is that the time? I've got to hurry.
**[08:33] gero**
Oh, pardon me.
**[08:38] gero**
I've been wondering...
**[08:41] gero**
Why does a man of your caliber
associate with that bunch?
**[08:45] io**
Are you talking to me?
**[08:48] gero**
Of course.
**[08:50] gero**
Someone like you would fit
right in with the student council.
**[08:54] io**
Is there any profit in listening to this?
***SIGN*** Student Council Room
**[09:02] gero**
And so, I think the student council
requires a head accountant
**[09:06] gero**
who's an expert in modern finance.
**[09:08] gero**
In other words, a treasurer.
**[09:12] ari**
It's true that we're dealing
with large sums of money here.
**[09:16] kusa**
So, do you have any candidates?
**[09:19] kusa**
They must have both the
intelligence and refinement
**[09:21] kusa**
suitable to our student council.
**[09:23] gero**
Yes, I have one.
**[09:32] io**
Me? Become the student council's treasurer?
**[09:34] gero**
I don't think it's a bad deal at all.
**[09:36] ari**
Of course, we know you're
involved in the Defense Club, too.
**[09:39] ari**
We don't expect you to answer right away.
**[09:41] io**
No, I'll join.
**[09:44] io**
If it will make me a profit.
**[09:47] kusa**
To ask for money in exchange for a
position on the sacred student council...
**[09:52] kusa**
But that's interesting.
**[09:54] kusa**
Then we will pay you adequate compensation.
**[09:58] itsu**
I'm always #1 in my grade,
so why is it #2 Naruko instead of me?
**[10:03] itsu**
I can't understand it...
**[10:06] gero**
* Now, even if they manage*
* to clear the test hurdle,*
**[10:09] gero**
* the Defense Club will be*
* left with four members.*
***SIGN*** Wombat
Born November 30th
(converted to Earth calendar)
Blood Type A (probably) / Sagittarius
Hobby: World peace
Likes: Love, spinach
**[10:19] teach**
Okay, start your tests.
**[10:23] ryuu**
Okay! Let's do this!
**[10:25] io**
Didn't you say you were tired before?
**[10:27] ryuu**
I am tired, but I won't sleep well if
the club is dissolved because of me.
**[10:34] itsu**
It gets under my skin so bad...
**[10:36] itsu**
He's the one person I can't lose to.
**[10:39] itsu**
Of course, I'm going to be #1 like always...
**[10:43] teach**
Itsumo, something wrong?
***SIGN*** Combined Finals Rankings
**[10:53] student**
Hey, what are you doing?
**[10:55] student**
No pushing! What's with you?
***SIGN*** Score Masatou Mu Zuruwaki Chitsugi Takashin Matsuji Itsumo Ichiban Naruko Io Name
**[10:58] itsu**
Wh-What is this?!
**[11:00] itsu**
Th-This must not happen!
**[11:04] itsu**
H-He makes money and gets #1,
**[11:07] itsu**
while I do nothing but study and get #2...
**[11:10] itsu**
It's unforgivable!
**[11:18] kusa**
Are you all right, Lord Zundar?
**[11:21] zun**
There.
**[11:23] zun**
He will be our target this time!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[11:27] yumoto**
Oh, wow!
**[11:28] yumoto**
I got another zero in Japanese!
**[11:31] en**
That's okay, it was within expectations.
**[11:33] wom**
How'd you do, Zaou-san?
**[11:35] ryuu**
To be frank, I didn't reach average in anything.
**[11:39] en**
It's okay.
**[11:40] en**
Naruko's high grades mean our
second year guys averaged out.
**[11:44] ryuu**
Thank you, Io!
**[11:46] wom**
Kinugawa-san, how about you?
**[11:49] atsu**
I got about 30 points
over the average, I suppose.
**[11:52] ryuu**
Which means...
**[11:53] atsu**
That doesn't completely cover for Yumoto's zero.
**[11:55] atsu**
So we still haven't reached average...
**[11:59] wom**
Which means everything's
riding on Yufuin-san's results...
**[12:03] atsu**
Did you guess the subject matter right?
**[12:07] en**
Right on the mark!
**[12:09] wom**
I-Incredible!
**[12:10] ryuu**
That's our Yufuin-senpai!
**[12:12] ryuu**
You're a guy who can do it when it counts!
**[12:14] yumoto**
Can I take these?
**[12:16] en**
What would you do with them?
**[12:18] yumoto**
Keep them as heirlooms.
**[12:19] en**
You don't have to do that.
**[12:21] atsu**
Well, this is a relief, though.
**[12:23] atsu**
Now the club won't be dissolved.
**[12:25] wom**
Oh, I'm so relieved!
**[12:27] io**
Hey there.
**[12:28] ryuu**
Hey, Io! Looks like our club won't be dissolved.
**[12:33] io**
That's great to hear.
**[12:35] io**
Oh, but I'm quitting the Defense Club.
**[12:39] io**
They said they'd provide me with compensation,
**[12:40] io**
so I decided to join the student council.
**[12:43] io**
Considering my side business,
**[12:44] io**
I won't have any time left for club activities,
**[12:46] io**
so I thought I'd just quit.
**[12:49] io**
So, that said, I'll be going now.
**[13:00] ryuu**
Hang on, Io!
**[13:02] io**
Is something wrong?
**[13:05] ryuu**
"Is something wrong," my ass!
What's this all about?
**[13:10] io**
It means that money is important.
**[13:13] io**
Money doesn't betray.
**[13:16] ryuu**
But *you* do betray?!
**[13:25] en**
I guess this screams "youth."
**[13:28] yumoto**
Did something happen?
**[13:30] wom**
This is an emergency situation!
**[13:33] atsu**
Even though we cleared the test hurdle,
**[13:34] atsu**
if Io quits, the club will be dissolved
**[13:37] atsu**
for no longer having five members.
**[13:41] wom**
Oh, sole mio!
**[13:43] wom**
What should we do?!
**[13:46] yumoto**
It's here! A monster!
**[13:48] monster**
Screw screw screw...
**[13:50] monster**
Screw screw screw...
**[13:53] yumoto**
It's saying "screw"!
That must be a Screw Monster!
**[13:57] en**
Another odd one...
**[13:58] atsu**
I can't tell by looking at it
whether it's strong or weak.
**[14:01] wom**
Now, everyone, transform!
**[14:04] yumoto**
Oh, but should we call Io-senpai?
**[14:06] ryuu**
No need for that!
**[14:09] ryuu**
We don't need Io here.
I could beat that monster by myself!
**[14:12] ryuu**
Let's go!
**[14:13] yumoto**
Wow, you're raring to go! I'll follow you!
**[14:17] en**
Good grief, this again?
**[14:19] atsu**
Now, don't say that.
**[14:21] wom**
It's time to Love Making
into the Battle Lovers!
**[14:24] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[14:52] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[14:53] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[14:56] en**
Love Making.
**[15:06] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[15:08] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[15:10] atsu**
Love Making!
**[15:20] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[15:22] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[15:25] ryuu**
Love Making!
**[15:35] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[15:36] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[15:39] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[15:42] four**
Of love!
**[15:45] monster**
Screw screw screw!
**[15:49] yumoto**
Hold it, Screw Monster!
**[15:50] monster**
Screw! Screw screw!
**[15:54] ryuu**
Okay, let's go!
**[15:57] ryuu**
Even without Sulfur here...
**[15:58] ryuu**
I'll face you myself!
**[16:00] monster**
Screw screw screw!
**[16:03] monster**
Screw!
**[16:05] ryuu**
Darn it!
**[16:07] monster**
Screw!
**[16:09] monster**
I'm gonna screw you up good!
**[16:16] monster**
Screw, screw...
**[16:17] monster**
Tickle tickle tickle!
**[16:22] ryuu**
Hey! Stop it! Cut that out!
**[16:25] monster**
Tickle tickle tickle!
**[16:27] en**
What's with that monster?
**[16:30] atsu**
Its attacks are so stupid.
**[16:32] yumoto**
Maybe, being a screw monster,
it's got just one screw loose?
**[16:38] yumoto**
Vesta's crying!
**[16:40] atsu**
Yeah, being tickled makes
him cry for some reason.
**[16:44] en**
That's just humiliating.
**[16:48] io**
Being that ticklish...
**[16:50] io**
He's playing right into the enemy's hands!
**[16:58] io**
Love Making.
**[17:08] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[17:10] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[17:14] yumoto**
Darn you...
**[17:19] io**
Take your filthy hands off him.
**[17:22] atsu**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[17:24] io**
I will not tolerate you touching Vesta!
**[17:27] monster**
Screw?
**[17:28] yumoto**
So cool!
**[17:47] itsu**
Th-That hurt...
**[17:49] yumoto**
Did you see that?
**[17:50] yumoto**
Even if Vesta fails,
Sulfur will cover for him!
**[17:54] yumoto**
When the two of them are
together, they're unbeatable!
**[17:56] yumoto**
That's the kind of team we are!
**[17:59] en**
Are you in any place to talk?
**[18:00] atsu**
You're the one we have
to cover for most of all.
**[18:02] yumoto**
You should make friends, too! Don't be alone!
**[18:06] monster**
I-I would if I could...
**[18:10] yumoto**
In that case, I'll be your friend!
**[18:14] yumoto**
Okay, let's go!
**[18:17] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[18:19] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[18:22] atsu**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[18:24] ryuu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[18:39] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[18:50] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[19:00] monster**
Thank you for being my friend...
**[19:05] monster**
I'm so happy.
**[19:11] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[19:18] ari**
I can't believe we lost.
**[19:22] gero**
Battle Lovers...
**[19:23] gero**
You'll pay!
**[19:25] gero**
You will never get away with this!
**[19:27] atsu**
Is that... our enemy?
**[19:29] ryuu**
Their faces are blurred out, though.
Their voices, too.
**[19:34] io**
Does that mean they have the same
advanced camouflage skill we do?
**[19:40] ryuu**
Some outfits.
**[19:42] en**
Looks like a cosplay contest.
**[19:44] atsu**
They're probably saying the same about us.
**[19:47] gero**
You people are lacking in beauty.
Too lacking in beauty!
**[19:51] yumoto**
What's with you guys? Who are you?
**[19:54] kusa**
How rude of us.
**[19:57] kusa**
The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
**[19:59] kusa**
Aurite!
**[20:01] ari**
The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
**[20:03] ari**
Argent!
**[20:05] gero**
The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
**[20:08] gero**
Perlite!
**[20:10] trio**
We are the rulers of this blue world...
**[20:13] trio**
Caerula Adamas!
**[20:16] yumoto**
Kaeru *(frog)*?
**[20:18] ari**
Well, shall we leave it at that for now?
**[20:22] gero**
Commanders can't be
expected to fight, after all.
**[20:24] kusa**
The next time we meet will be the end of you.
**[20:28] kusa**
You'd do well to prepare for it.
**[20:33] atsu**
They introduced themselves then left...
**[20:35] en**
Lucky us. You can't talk
to people like that anyway.
**[20:40] ryuu**
Weren't you a bit late?
**[20:41] io**
I'm sorry.
**[20:43] io**
I was calculating the profit margin
I'd achieve if I joined the student council.
**[20:47] ryuu**
So, which did you determine was more profitable?
**[20:50] io**
I can't tell you that.
**[20:53] ryuu**
You should be able to do a calculation
like that in your head immediately!
**[20:55] yumoto**
I guess we're back to normal, huh?
**[20:57] ryuu**
What took you so long?!
**[20:57] en**
Let's go home. I'm tired.
**[20:58] io**
Well, figuring in the rate of
fluctuation made it difficult...
**[20:59] atsu**
I want to get changed.
**[21:02] wom**
Well, that settles that!
**[21:11] gero**
So, in the end, Naruko-kun turned us down.
**[21:14] ari**
So the Defense Club will continue on?
**[21:16] kusa**
Enough. This topic is not suitable for lunchtime.
**[21:20] yumoto**
Box lunch! Box lunch! It makes me so happy!
**[21:24] yumoto**
Box lunch! Box lunch!
**[21:26] yumoto**
You gotta eat it while it's still warm!
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[21:34] yumoto**
How's the water feel?
**[21:35] en**
It's perfect.
**[21:37] yumoto**
Big bro! He says the water's perfect!
**[21:40] atsu**
No, but really, this is a natural hot spring.
**[21:44] atsu**
He's not preserving the
heat by chopping wood...
**[21:46] ryuu**
To be honest, there's
zero point in chopping wood.
**[21:48] io**
I don't understand him at all.
**[21:50] yumoto**
No, when I look at my
big brother's back, I know.
**[21:54] yumoto**
He's not a man good for
nothing but chopping wood.
**[21:56] yumoto**
Chopping wood is just what he loves!
**[21:59] yumoto**
I want to become a man who throws
himself into what he loves, just like him.
**[23:40] wom**
Just because it's summer,
you're going to the beach? Really...
**[23:43] wom**
Just what do you think your
duty as the Battle Lovers is?!
**[23:47] wom**
What? Mr. Tawarayama is missing!
**[23:50] wom**
Next time: Love, Training Camp,
and Toothbrushes.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes
**[23:53] wom**
Love Making!
# 7 - Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Binan High School Sakashita
**[00:08] yumoto**
The other guys sure are late!
**[00:10] en**
What's with his outfit?
**[00:13] atsu**
Makes it hard to shout, "Sorry
for the wait!" and run up to him.
**[00:15] ryuu**
He's a grade schooler. A grade schooler
who can't wait to get to the ocean.
**[00:18] io**
Actually, you can't ride a train
without a shirt on, can you?
**[00:22] io**
It's criminal indecent exposure.
**[00:24] ryuu**
We don't have a choice. Let's get him dressed.
**[00:28] yumoto**
You're late, senpai!
**[00:30] en**
No, we've been here a while.
**[00:32] en**
We just didn't have the
courage to call out to you.
**[00:35] ryuu**
Anyway, put something on.
**[00:37] atsu**
By the way, where's Wombat?
**[00:39] wombat**
My, my! Sorry for the wait, everyone!
**[00:42] en**
Oh, he's here.
**[00:43] yumoto**
Wom-san!
**[00:44] atsu**
Even in this heat, you want to handle him?
**[00:47] yumoto**
The urge to cuddle isn't restricted by the season!
**[00:51] atsu**
That sounds rough.
***SIGN*** Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes
**[02:34] yumoto**
So good! Kakinotane are so good!
**[02:38] atsu**
It's been hot every day.
Will Mr. Tawarayama be okay?
**[02:41] wom**
Of course, that's why I brought him.
**[02:44] ryuu**
The FX again?
**[02:45] io**
No, I'm checking out an online lodging service.
**[02:49] io**
You should be able to get a discount
if you register your email address.
**[02:53] ryuu**
That's our Io.
**[02:54] en**
Remind me.
**[02:56] en**
Why did we end up going to a training
camp in this terrible heat, again?
**[03:00] atsu**
Hey, come on.
***SIGN*** Active Summer
Travel!
**[03:04] en**
Hey. Let's go to the ocean.
**[03:07] both**
Ocean!
**[03:10] en**
Oh, really? I proposed it?
**[03:12] yumoto**
What's wrong with a training camp?
**[03:15] yumoto**
It's the ocean! The ocean!
**[03:16] atsu**
There'll be a hot spring there, too.
**[03:18] ryuu**
No female presence, though.
**[03:20] gero**
The peasants do love their trains, don't they?
**[03:22] gero**
But a limousine is so much more luxurious.
**[03:24] ari**
I think they take trains because they don't
have limousines, not because they like it.
**[03:28] gero**
Really?
**[03:29] gero**
But I still don't like traveling by train.
**[03:33] gero**
What about you, President?
**[03:34] kusa**
I have no objection to traveling by train.
**[03:37] kusa**
However, it should at least be chartered.
**[03:40] gero**
That's right.
**[03:41] gero**
Would you like some special selection Kakinotane?
**[03:44] kusa**
I would.
**[03:46] yumoto**
Ocean!
**[03:49] yumoto**
It's the ocean! The ocean!
**[03:50] ryuu**
We know. You don't have to shout.
**[03:53] en**
Well, you've got the blinding
sun and the white sand, but...
**[03:57] en**
Is it just my imagination,
or is something a bit odd?
**[04:03] ryuu**
It's all dudes.
**[04:05] io**
You're right. Why is it all men here?
**[04:08] en**
Is this actually "that kind of place"?
**[04:11] yumoto**
What's "that kind of place"?
**[04:12] en**
Hey, Atsushi. You're the one
who chose this place, right?
**[04:15] yumoto**
You were?
**[04:17] atsu**
Well, see...
**[04:19] atsu**
Let's see. Danran Beach... Danran Beach...
**[04:23] atsu**
"Danran" as in "happy family" Beach...
**[04:26] atsu**
I was sure it was in this area...
**[04:27] macho**
Hey, buddy!
**[04:29] macho**
Are you looking for a beach?
**[04:31] atsu**
Uh, yeah.
**[04:32] macho**
Let me show you!
**[04:36] atsu**
Th-Thank you...
***SIGN*** Welcome to Danran (Wild Man) Beach
**[04:40] atsu**
It was the wrong Danran...
**[04:42] en**
Be aware of this stuff.
**[04:43] atsu**
Sorry.
**[04:44] io**
The name by itself sounds very family-oriented.
**[04:46] ryuu**
No wonder it lacks in female presence.
**[04:49] yumoto**
So? What's wrong with this place?
**[04:52] yumoto**
There's not too many people,
and the ocean is beautiful!
**[04:54] wom**
My first trip to the ocean!
**[04:57] wom**
It's a wonderful beach, isn't it?
**[05:15] yumoto**
Ocean!
**[05:17] gero**
This would be the perfect resort,
if not for all that vulgar noise.
**[05:21] gero**
It's a shame, isn't it?
**[05:23] kusa**
Clear the mind of mundane thoughts,
**[05:25] kusa**
and you can block out even the basest of noises.
**[05:28] ari**
That's our Kinshiro.
**[05:29] ari**
You're strict with yourself even at a resort, eh?
**[05:31] [SONG] sign**
Ice Beach Shop Danran Takoyaki, Yakisoba, Frankfurters
**[05:37] macho**
Hey, buddy, you sure can put
'em down! Wanna try for another?
**[05:40] tawara**
Let's go! Let's go!
**[05:41] tawra**
And another for my wombat!
**[05:43] wom**
Squeak! Squeak!
**[05:45] macho**
So cute!
**[05:47] yumoto**
I want to cuddle him, too...
**[05:49] host**
Hello there.
**[05:51] host**
Well, cutie pie, have you decided on your order?
**[05:55] yumoto**
Wow! You're so cool, Miss...
**[05:59] yumoto**
Umm... Mister?
**[06:00] host**
"Miss" is just fine.
**[06:02] yumoto**
Got it! Then I'll have a rainbow frappé, Miss!
**[06:06] host**
And is that all?
**[06:07] yumoto**
Yeah!
**[06:08] host**
We've got many far more amazing things.
**[06:12] host**
Far more amazing.
**[06:13] yumoto**
Really?!
**[06:15] ryuu**
Is it okay to leave them like that?
**[06:18] en**
My instincts are telling me
not to go near that place.
**[06:22] atsu**
En-chan, I think you could fit right in.
**[06:25] io**
You can make a favorable impression by
offering things at below market value.
**[06:28] atsu**
Anyway, are you guys hungry?
**[06:30] en**
Yeah. Let's go to the inn.
***SIGN*** Inn Tamakuro Bath
**[06:35] yumoto**
Tamakuro Bath?
**[06:36] ryuu**
I'm getting an incredible sense of déjà vu.
**[06:38] yumoto**
Yeah. It looks just like the Kurotama Bath!
**[06:41] atsu**
This was the only place
with vacancies this weekend.
**[06:44] en**
This doesn't feel fresh at all.
**[06:46] io**
Are they cutting corners?
**[06:47] atsu**
Don't say that!
**[06:51] wom**
Well, shall we get going?
**[06:56] yumoto**
Sleepover!
**[06:57] yumoto**
We owe you for a night's stay and a meal!
**[07:00] en**
Not bad, eh?
**[07:01] ryuu**
But isn't it a bit small for all of us?
**[07:03] io**
No. We'll only be sleeping here,
so it should be fine.
**[07:06] en**
Yeah.
**[07:12] kusa**
Not bad, I'd say.
**[07:13] ari**
I'm sorry it's so small.
It's the only room they had left.
**[07:16] gero**
We each have our own bedroom, right?
**[07:18] ari**
Of course.
**[07:19] gero**
Then there's no problem!
***SIGN*** Men
***SIGN*** Large
Bath
**[07:23] en**
Nothing new here, either.
**[07:25] io**
In fact, it's exactly what we always do.
**[07:27] ryuu**
Doesn't feel like we've traveled at all.
**[07:29] atsu**
Sorry.
**[07:31] en**
It's not your fault, Atsushi.
**[07:32] io**
This actually makes it more relaxing.
**[07:34] ryuu**
Isn't it funny how similar it looks?
**[07:36] en**
There may even be other similarities.
**[07:38] yumoto**
If I open this door...
**[07:40] yumoto**
Maybe my brother Goro will be there!
**[07:42] atsu**
No way.
**[07:43] yumoto**
There!
**[07:45] yumoto**
Wow!
**[07:46] yumoto**
An open-air bath!
**[07:47] wom**
What?!
**[07:50] en**
An unexpected development.
**[07:51] atsu**
Want to check it out?
**[07:52] en**
Of course.
**[07:54] en**
This is nice!
**[07:55] ryuu**
They should have a sign out for this.
**[08:01] io**
Everyone!
**[08:03] io**
There's been an incident.
**[08:04] yumoto**
A murder?!
**[08:06] atsu**
Now, now. This isn't Detective C*nan.
**[08:08] yumoto**
I guess...
**[08:09] io**
Someone has used my toothbrush!
**[08:14] ryuu**
Toothbrush?
**[08:15] io**
Yes.
**[08:16] io**
My toothbrush!
**[08:26] io**
This is a criminal act.
**[08:29] io**
It can be called nothing but a criminal act!
**[08:32] io**
This was no mistake.
**[08:34] io**
Someone used my toothbrush on purpose!
**[08:37] en**
No, no, it was probably just a mistake.
**[08:40] ryuu**
That's right. You're overthinking it, Io.
**[08:42] io**
Are you sure?
**[08:44] io**
If any of you were in my position right now,
**[08:46] io**
you would be able to understand this
unparalleled feeling of discomfort!
**[08:50] io**
Try to imagine it.
**[08:52] io**
Someone has intentionally used your toothbrush.
**[08:55] io**
What's more, they didn't even wash it afterwards.
**[08:57] io**
They treated it coarsely, as if they wanted
the victim to discover the signs of its use!
**[09:01] atsu**
I probably wouldn't like that.
**[09:02] en**
Yeah, I wouldn't like it.
**[09:04] ryuu**
There are only men here, after all.
**[09:06] wom**
It wasn't me!
**[09:08] en**
What's with the sudden flag?
**[09:10] wom**
I'm merely telling the truth.
**[09:12] wom**
First of all, I'd never do such a monstrous
thing with Mr. Tawarayama right here.
**[09:17] atsu**
But you're just controlling him, aren't you?
**[09:19] tawara**
I am absolutely not being controlled.
**[09:21] en**
You're a corpse.
**[09:22] wom**
I told you, he's not dead yet!
**[09:24] yumoto**
I use an electric frog toothbrush!
**[09:27] io**
Are you people trying to change the subject?
**[09:29] atsu**
I haven't brushed my teeth yet.
**[09:31] ryuu**
Same.
**[09:32] en**
Me, either.
**[09:34] io**
Very well.
**[09:35] io**
Then, everyone face me and go, "Hah!"
**[09:39] io**
"Hah!"
**[09:40] yumoto**
Hah?
**[09:41] io**
If you've brushed your teeth,
**[09:43] io**
there should still be the faint scent
of toothpaste on your breath!
**[09:46] ryuu**
That makes sense.
**[09:47] en**
But why do you care so much if
a toothbrush or two gets used?
**[09:51] yumoto**
I agree!
**[09:53] ryuu**
But don't you see why
Io would feel conflicted?
**[09:56] ryuu**
Someone used his toothbrush on purpose.
**[09:58] ryuu**
It's like getting tricked into an indirect kiss.
**[10:00] yumoto**
Oh, that's like when you secretly play
the recorder of someone you like, right?
**[10:05] io**
Yes. That's exactly it.
**[10:07] atsu**
That really would be rough.
**[10:09] io**
It is very rough!
**[10:11] io**
Especially if the criminal
turns out to be one of us here!
**[10:17] en**
Really?
**[10:18] en**
I wouldn't care that much, personally.
**[10:21] io**
Yufuin-senpai.
**[10:22] io**
I've noticed that all this time,
**[10:25] io**
you've been trying to shrug this
problem off as much as possible.
**[10:29] io**
Are you afraid of something
coming out if you're questioned?
**[10:33] en**
Huh? Hey, what's with this vibe?
**[10:37] en**
You're acting like I secretly used Naruko's toothbrush
**[10:40] en**
and now I'm over the moon about it or something.
**[10:42] wom**
It's not unthinkable.
**[10:45] wom**
My observations tell me that you're a person
**[10:48] wom**
who could be classified as a
loose individual in many respects.
**[10:53] wom**
Particularly in regard to morality.
**[10:55] en**
Hey, now. This is getting weird.
**[10:58] atsu**
Of course, if En-chan could be called gray,
**[11:01] atsu**
Ryuu isn't exactly pure white, either.
**[11:03] ryuu**
Me?
**[11:04] atsu**
Ryuu, you claim to love women,
**[11:06] atsu**
but I've never actually seen
you with a woman before.
**[11:09] atsu**
Let's be honest. You like Io, right?
**[11:12] ryuu**
Gross!
**[11:13] ryuu**
It's gross when you put it that way.
**[11:15] ryuu**
I consider Io my buddy, so he's, I mean...
**[11:20] ryuu**
It's not that kind of...
**[11:21] io**
Ryuu... Was it you?
**[11:25] ryuu**
Io...
**[11:27] ryuu**
Okay, this really is getting weird!
**[11:30] ryuu**
Do something, Yumoto!
**[11:32] yumoto**
I don't see why it matters
whose toothbrush you use!
**[11:35] io**
Stop passing the conversation to Yumoto.
**[11:38] io**
We're getting off topic!
**[11:39] ryuu**
Sorry.
**[11:40] atsu**
Anyway, the question is, can we assume
that someone among us has eyes for Io?
**[11:46] en**
You can sum it up like that,
but you're a suspect, too, Atsushi.
**[11:51] ryuu**
That's true.
**[11:52] ryuu**
Kinugawa-senpai, I've seen you
look at Io in a rather odd way before.
**[11:55] atsu**
No, no, no, no...
**[12:00] yumoto**
I'm pruning. Can we get out now?
**[12:04] en**
Good idea.
**[12:08] en**
They're rather close... the futons.
**[12:10] atsu**
Yeah.
**[12:11] atsu**
I don't know about sleeping this close
to you guys under these circumstances...
**[12:15] ryuu**
Why are you acting like a victim here?
**[12:18] ryuu**
Yufuin-senpai, Kinugawa-senpai,
you're both incredibly gray individuals.
**[12:21] io**
That's right.
**[12:24] yumoto**
But we can't sleep yet, huh?
**[12:27] yumoto**
We should keep having fun!
**[12:28] yumoto**
Like a pillow fight, or a test of courage!
**[12:31] yumoto**
It's a training camp! We've gotta do it!
**[12:32] ryuu**
You really are a grade schooler.
**[12:34] en**
It amazes me that you can think about
having fun in these circumstances.
**[12:39] yumoto**
Well, shall we start with the test of courage?
**[12:42] io**
We didn't even have a
conversation, let alone a debate.
**[12:46] en**
Yeah.
**[12:48] yumoto**
Pass through the forest next to the inn.
**[12:50] yumoto**
That lit-up tree is the goal!
**[12:54] yumoto**
Everyone, do you have your map
and flashlights from the inn?
**[12:58] all**
Yes.
**[13:00] atsu**
We're really doing this, huh?
**[13:02] en**
We've got lights, after all.
**[13:03] ryuu**
Well, I don't think I could sleep with
that weird feeling hanging over us anyway.
**[13:07] io**
I absolutely can't sleep.
**[13:08] io**
Not until I find the culprit
who used my toothbrush.
**[13:12] en**
But when you think about it,
**[13:14] en**
should we have a test of courage
in these circumstances?
**[13:17] io**
What do you mean?
**[13:18] en**
Well, it happens a lot, you know?
**[13:28] en**
That kind of thing.
**[13:30] io**
I see.
**[13:31] ryuu**
I'm not gonna hug anyone!
**[13:33] yumoto**
Okay, let's get started!
**[13:35] io**
Listen to what we're saying here!
**[13:36] atsu**
Saying that to Yumoto won't do any good.
**[13:39] en**
True.
**[13:45] gero**
The beachside this afternoon...
**[13:47] gero**
Is there really nothing we can do about it?
**[13:49] kuso**
If it bothers you that much,
**[13:51] kuso**
shall I talk to the owners and
buy up the surrounding beaches?
**[13:55] ari**
Strong words, those are.
**[13:57] ari**
Shall we get out of the
bath and have some tea?
**[14:04] atsu**
It's pitch black, huh?
**[14:05] en**
Atsushi. You're too close.
**[14:08] atsu**
Sorry. I just got scared.
**[14:10] en**
*So he says, but I bet he got close on purpose.*
**[14:13] atsu**
*Is En-chan being overly aware of my presence?*
**[14:18] atsu**
Wh-What?!
**[14:20] en**
Sorry, I tripped over a rock.
**[14:23] en**
Hey, Atsushi, are you eating properly?
**[14:26] en**
Your waist is really thin.
**[14:28] atsu**
*My waist is thin?*
**[14:30] atsu**
*En-chan, you really are...*
**[14:32] en**
*Crap...*
**[14:33] en**
*I totally should not have said that...*
**[14:41] ryuu**
Woah, scary.
**[14:43] ryuu**
It really does feel like a ghost will show up.
**[14:45] io**
Living people are far scarier.
**[14:47] io**
They do things like using people's toothbrushes.
**[14:49] ryuu**
Yeah, but still...
**[14:50] ryuu**
I really don't handle this kind of thing well.
**[14:53] io**
*He's sticking so close to me...*
**[14:56] io**
*Is Ryuu's womanizing just camouflage, after all?*
**[15:00] ryuu**
*If only I were with a cute girl here...*
**[15:03] ryuu**
*But then I'd want her doing this to me...*
**[15:08] ari**
Hey, I know. You want to try taking a shortcut?
**[15:11] ari**
Huh? Kinshiro? Akoya?
**[15:15] [SONG] sign**
Private Property
Keep Out
-Danran Resort
**[15:21] yumoto**
Feels good!
**[15:23] yumoto**
The cuddles that you have regardless of
who might be watching are so amazing.
**[15:28] wom**
Th-That was awful... You beast!
**[15:31] yumoto**
I cuddle when I want to!
**[15:33] yumoto**
That's the condition for joining
the Battle Lovers, isn't it?
**[15:36] wom**
I never agreed to that.
**[15:38] yumoto**
Now, let's go!
**[15:39] wom**
How self-serving you are...
**[15:48] yumoto**
He's gone.
**[15:50] yumoto**
Hey! Where are you?
**[15:53] yumoto**
I'm gonna leave you behind!
**[15:55] gero**
Could it be...
**[15:57] gero**
that I'm lost?
**[15:59] gero**
Arima will make fun of me...
**[16:03] kusa**
I've been careless.
**[16:06] kusa**
How could I fall behind the other two?
**[16:11] wom**
I must have lost consciousness...
**[16:14] wom**
M-Mr. Tawarayama?!
**[16:18] wom**
Where did you go?!
**[16:20] tam**
Where am I? And in a yukata, at that?
**[16:23] tam**
I'm sure I was just preparing tests at school...
**[16:27] atsu**
Huh? I thought I saw a flash.
**[16:30] en**
Probably a camera.
**[16:32] en**
I had my suspicions about him.
**[16:34] atsu**
Who?
**[16:36] en**
The toothbrush incident, this development...
**[16:38] en**
It's all seemed too odd to me.
**[16:40] atsu**
It's true that this sort of thing
would never happen normally.
**[16:43] en**
Which means...
**[16:45] atsu**
Wombat...
**[16:46] en**
Let's take him to task.
**[16:51] taw**
What's going on?!
**[16:57] taw**
Wh-Why is this happening?
**[17:01] io**
Did you hear something?
**[17:02] ryuu**
Behind us, right?
**[17:04] io**
Yes.
**[17:05] ryuu**
A m-molester?
**[17:06] io**
Why would you think that?
**[17:08] ryuu**
Well, there was that "unique" beach back there...
**[17:11] ryuu**
And we're pretty hot guys, you know?
**[17:13] io**
Well, I suppose if I had to classify us,
we'd be on the hot side.
**[17:16] ryuu**
Right?
**[17:17] ryuu**
So it must have been the molester
who used your toothbrush.
**[17:21] ryuu**
It's obvious that no one in our group
would do something like that!
**[17:24] io**
You have a point.
**[17:26] ryuu**
Let's catch him and take him to task!
**[17:28] io**
Good idea.
**[17:29] taw**
Was I dead, perhaps?
**[17:32] taw**
My body feels rather numb,
there's not much feeling...
**[17:36] taw**
S-Someone save me!
**[17:44] en**
Okay, on three.
**[17:47] atsu**
Yeah.
**[17:51] ryuu**
Okay, on three.
**[17:54] io**
Right.
**[17:55] both**
One, two...
**[17:56] all**
Three!
**[18:06] io**
Did you catch the molester?
**[18:11] ryuu**
Why are you guys here?
**[18:12] gero**
Who are you calling a molester?
**[18:15] gero**
And you're heavy!
**[18:17] en**
Mr. President.
**[18:19] en**
You smell nice. Fresh out of the bath?
**[18:22] kusa**
Remove yourself from me at once!
**[18:24] en**
Sure, sorry.
**[18:28] atsu**
You okay?
**[18:32] kusa**
Aside from an extreme feeling of discomfort.
**[18:37] io**
Can you stand?
**[18:39] gero**
I'm fine.
**[18:42] io**
There's a leaf stuck on you.
**[18:45] ryuu**
Why are you turning red?
**[18:47] gero**
Sh-Shut up!
**[18:49] atsu**
What are you doing here?
**[18:51] kusa**
What are *you* all doing here?
**[18:53] en**
Defense Club training camp.
**[18:55] kusa**
I wasn't asking you!
**[18:57] ari**
Huh?
**[18:58] ari**
What's all this?
**[19:00] ari**
What are you all doing here together?
**[19:01] kusa**
Never mind. It's all meaningless.
**[19:03] kusa**
I don't want to think about it.
**[19:05] kusa**
I'm erasing it from my memory.
**[19:07] gero**
Hey, President, wait for us!
**[19:10] ari**
I have no idea what's going on, but bye!
**[19:12] io**
What are they doing here?
**[19:14] atsu**
It's a mystery.
**[19:16] en**
There was a weird vibe to those guys, too.
**[19:20] yumoto**
Everyone's taking so long!
**[19:22] yumoto**
Even Wom-san ran away.
**[19:24] yumoto**
Nothing to do.
**[19:26] atsu**
I really do suspect Wombat, though.
**[19:28] en**
He's an alien, after all.
**[19:30] ryuu**
I'm still pushing the molester theory.
**[19:32] io**
Rejected.
**[19:33] ryuu**
Huh?
**[19:35] yumoto**
I've been waiting forever!
**[19:37] ryuu**
Sorry, sorry.
**[19:38] atsu**
A lot of things happened.
**[19:43] taw**
Are those my students?
**[19:46] taw**
Hey!
**[19:55] yumoto**
A monster!
**[19:57] yumoto**
Let's Love Making!
**[20:00] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[20:03] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[20:05] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[20:07] five**
Of love!
**[20:10] yumoto**
Take this, monster!
**[20:25] wom**
No! Don't do that!
**[20:27] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[20:38] taw**
What's going on?!
**[20:49] yumoto**
Huh? Mr. Tawarayama?
**[20:52] io**
So it wasn't a monster?
**[20:54] ryuu**
I guess Tawarayama was the monster.
**[20:56] atsu**
To be honest, it was so dark,
I couldn't really see...
**[20:59] en**
We kinda got carried away there.
**[21:01] wom**
Tawarayama-san! Are you okay?
**[21:03] en**
It's fine. He was dead already anyway.
**[21:06] atsu**
Was this your doing?
**[21:08] io**
If you're going to scare us,
at least do it properly.
**[21:10] wom**
Um...
**[21:11] ryuu**
Say "boo" or something.
**[21:13] io**
That's too old-fashioned.
**[21:15] ryuu**
It was just one example!
**[21:17] yumoto**
I'm so sleepy. Let's go home.
**[21:21] ryuu**
You're the one who wanted
to do the test of courage!
**[21:23] atsu**
Well, let's go back anyway.
**[21:25] en**
Yeah.
**[21:26] io**
More importantly, I want to know
who used my toothbrush!
**[21:30] en**
You're still stuck on that?
**[21:32] atsu**
Let's go, Yumoto.
**[21:33] yumoto**
Okay...
**[21:34] io**
I will not sleep until we resolve
the matter of my toothbrush!
**[21:37] wom**
Um... Everyone...
**[21:40] wom**
Please help me... Please...
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[21:50] wom**
They're a bit blurry from the camera shaking...
**[21:53] wom**
But it's nice to gain new memories like this.
**[21:58] wom**
Though things got a bit hairy at the end there.
**[22:02] wom**
Th-This is...
***SIGN*** Delete this photo?
Yes | No
**[23:40] kusa**
"Friendship!"
**[23:41] kusa**
There is nothing more
transient and fragile than this.
**[23:45] kusa**
Now, let us sever the bonds between people,
**[23:48] kusa**
and plunge the world into despair!
**[23:51] kusa**
Next time: Love Wanders!
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love Wanders!
**[23:53] kusa**
Conquest!
# 8 - Love Wanders
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Keep out!
**[00:10] komi**
*My name is Komi Shou.*
***SIGN*** Komi Shou
**[00:13] komi**
*I'm a second year student at Binan High School,*
**[00:15] komi**
*but for certain reasons, I became a shut-in.*
***SIGN*** 12. Anonymous Shut-in
I hate it when people talk to
me when I'm clearly reading
***SIGN*** 22. Anonymous Shut-in
It's funny how they
always come late to meetings
***SIGN*** 23. Anonymous Shut-in
My friend's really picky
about food, won't eat any meat
***SIGN*** 32. Anonymous Shut-in
>>23
He probably has another
reason for that, right?
***SIGN*** 50. Anonymous Shut-in
Everyone around me are good people.
They're all working really hard.
***SIGN*** 51. Anonymous Shut-in
Oh, that's cool ^^
***SIGN*** 65. Anonymous Shut-in
Friends are a pain in the ass anyway.
I cut myself off from them (lololololol)
**[00:23] komi**
Are you me?
***SIGN*** 65. Anonymous Shut-in
Friends are a pain in the ass anyway.
I cut myself off from them (lololololol)
***SIGN*** 168. Anonymous Shut-in
>>65
Good for you, loner
***SIGN*** 67. Anonymous Shut-in
>>65
Mop up those tears
***SIGN*** 69. Anonymous Shut-in
Don't get desperate on us...
***SIGN*** 71. Anonymous Shut-in
>>65
You should probably take
another look at yourself
***SIGN*** 72. Anonymous Shut-in
What happened, anyway?
***SIGN*** 79. Anonymous Shut-in
Probably nothing.
I bet he's just sulking.
***SIGN*** 83. Anonymous Shut-in
Bet his friends were relieved, too.
***SIGN*** 84. Anonymous Shut-in
True
**[00:35] komi**
Damn it! Damn it!
**[00:36] komi**
Who needs friends?!
I'm better off without them!
**[00:41] komi**
I don't need...
**[00:49] ari**
Good evening.
**[00:53] komi**
I-I-Intruders!
**[00:55] kusa**
We are not intruders.
**[00:57] zun**
We are conquerors!
**[00:59] zun**
Now, release the Zundar Needle!
**[01:04] trio**
Donum!
**[01:14] komi**
I... I'll tear it all apart...
**[01:17] komi**
That friendship crap...
**[01:19] komi**
I'll tear it limb from limb!
***SIGN*** Love Wanders
**[03:02] en**
Damn, if I'm late today,
I'll get called to the faculty office.
**[03:06] atsu**
So run faster, then!
***SIGN*** Delicious Life Campaign♥
**[03:09] en**
Hey, sorry. Hang on a minute.
**[03:12] en**
I'm gonna buy some bread.
**[03:13] atsu**
Oh, what the heck?
***SIGN*** Delicious Life Campaign♥
**[03:16] atsu**
I'm going on without you!
***SIGN*** Fresh-Baked Cream Bread
**[03:42] en**
Don't leave me behind!
**[03:44] atsu**
You scared me!
**[03:45] en**
I felt so alone!
**[03:46] atsu**
But I was going to be late!
**[03:48] en**
So you're saying you don't care if I'm late?
**[03:50] atsu**
But that's why I waited.
**[03:51] en**
You didn't wait! You *went*!
**[03:53] atsu**
I waited by walking slowly!
**[03:56] atsu**
What's with you? This is a
weird thing to pick a fight over.
**[03:59] en**
You've been really cold lately.
**[04:02] atsu**
What are you basing that on?
**[04:04] atsu**
Didn't we have the most fun in history
together over summer vacation?
**[04:07] en**
Or maybe we actually got a little too close?
**[04:10] atsu**
Why are you talking like such a pain in the ass?
**[04:12] en**
That's right.
**[04:14] en**
I guess I am a pain in the ass.
**[04:17] atsu**
What's with you, En-chan?
**[04:18] atsu**
Did you eat some poisonous
mushrooms or something?
**[04:21] en**
Just...
**[04:22] en**
Stay away from me.
**[04:24] ---**
Hey...
**[04:25] atsu**
Wait!
**[04:26] en**
Don't come this way!
**[04:27] atsu**
I have to! I'm going to school, too!
**[04:35] teach**
Kinugawa, you're late.
**[04:36] atsu**
Oh, sorry.
**[04:38] teach**
Anyway, never forget to check your own work.
**[04:41] teach**
But at the same time, be prompt in—
**[04:43] atsu**
Teacher! My stomach hurts,
so I'm going to the nurse's office!
**[04:46] teach**
Right after you got here?!
**[04:47] atsu**
Did I do something wrong?
**[04:53] en**
Not really.
**[04:55] atsu**
Then is there a reason you said that stuff?
**[04:58] en**
Not really.
**[04:59] atsu**
Is it because the last time you came over,
**[05:01] atsu**
I spent the whole time doing a jigsaw puzzle?
**[05:03] en**
Not really.
**[05:04] atsu**
"Not really" doesn't tell me anything.
**[05:09] atsu**
Hey, c'mon!
**[05:10] en**
Just leave me alone already!
**[05:12] en**
It's really suffocating when you do that!
**[05:18] atsu**
Fine.
**[05:29] yumoto**
Box lunch! Box lunch!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[05:35] en**
Disappear!
**[05:39] en**
Someone kill me!
**[05:39] ryuu**
Hey, what are you standing there for?
**[05:42] ryuu**
Whoa, what's he doing?
**[05:43] io**
Is this a new exercise of some kind?
**[05:46] four**
A fight?!
**[05:48] ryuu**
With Kinugawa-senpai,
who you're always so close with?
**[05:50] io**
How come?
**[05:51] en**
I don't know. Maybe it's menopause?
**[05:54] io**
Your face does look old,
but isn't it a bit early for that?
**[05:56] en**
They say men go through
menopause too, you know.
**[05:58] ryuu**
You're not even sure if you're
done with puberty yet.
**[06:00] en**
Oh, I want to disappear!
**[06:02] ryuu**
See, that kind of thing is definitely puberty.
**[06:04] yumoto**
Why not just say you're sorry and make up?
**[06:08] en**
It's nice that you can
take everything so lightly.
**[06:10] wom**
I agree that a prompt
apology is the best strategy!
**[06:14] wom**
Spaces without love render the heart empty!
**[06:17] en**
Even Wombat is lecturing me...
**[06:22] en**
That pitch... He's coming!
**[06:28] ryuu**
Yo.
**[06:29] io**
Hello there.
**[06:30] atsu**
Hey.
**[06:31] yumoto**
Lunch?
**[06:32] yumoto**
I'm about to get started, too!
**[06:34] ryuu**
Yeah, on your second.
**[06:40] atsu**
No, I'll eat in the cafeteria today.
**[06:42] atsu**
I just came to pick up something I forgot.
**[06:44] atsu**
Later.
**[06:46] yumoto**
Hey, is it true you had a
fight with En-chan-senpai?
**[06:50] both**
*Right to the point?!*
**[06:52] atsu**
I don't know about a fight.
I think he's just sulking.
**[06:58] yumoto**
Then you should go offer to
make up with him, Atsushi-senpai!
**[07:04] atsu**
I'd better pass for now.
**[07:07] atsu**
Sometimes it's best to let sleeping dogs lie.
**[07:12] en**
Are you really okay with that?!
**[07:15] atsu**
En-cha—
**[07:15] en**
You should care more about me!
Be more persistent!
**[07:18] atsu**
That's totally different
from what you said before!
**[07:19] en**
You're really cold for someone
whose name means "warm," you know.
**[07:22] atsu**
Don't bring my name into this!
I'm really worried about you!
**[07:24] ryuu**
Hey, hey...
**[07:24] atsu**
Am I suffocating you, or do you
want me to care more? Which is it?
**[07:26] en**
Both! Humans are contradictory, after all!
**[07:30] atsu**
That's a pain in the ass!
**[07:31] en**
Yeah, that's right!
**[07:32] yumoto**
Hey, c'mon, cut it out!
**[07:34] atsu**
Don't worry, Yumoto.
It's between me and En-chan.
**[07:38] en**
That's just it.
**[07:39] en**
Why can't you be that
thoughtful with me, I wonder?
**[07:42] atsu**
I'm trying to be nice to you, too.
**[07:45] en**
Is that so?
**[07:46] en**
I know the excitement you show in
the emails you send to me and Yumoto
**[07:51] en**
are on totally different levels!
**[07:56] en**
Your replies to me are always
less than five words long!
**[07:58] atsu**
Unlike yours, Yumoto's emails
**[08:00] atsu**
aren't just bare-bones random
sentences with no punctuation!
**[08:03] atsu**
Plus, they come attached
with excited emoticons!
**[08:05] atsu**
Don't you think I should
respond to that in kind?
**[08:08] atsu**
By the way, have you been
stealing my phone to look at it?!
**[08:08] en**
The presence or absence of
emoticons shows your favoritism!
**[08:11] en**
Send me emails with emoticons sometimes!
**[08:13] atsu**
Then send me emails of
a decent length sometimes!
**[08:16] atsu**
So have you been looking
at my phone or not? Well?
**[08:16] io**
I guess this *is* a fight, but...
**[08:18] en**
What if I have?!
**[08:19] ryuu**
It's the type it doesn't
pay to interfere with, right?
**[08:19] atsu**
I'd say you're a jerk!
**[08:20] en**
Then say it! Show your
contempt for how pathetic I am!
**[08:22] atsu**
So you admit it, you jerk!
**[08:24] yumoto**
U-Um, you guys...
**[08:27] yumoto**
Why not leave it at that and have lunch?
**[08:29] both**
No, thanks.
***SIGN*** Binan High School
**[08:55] yumoto**
I've got to get them to make up somehow.
**[08:58] ryuu**
Three girls a day... No, day and night...
**[09:01] io**
To cut my losses or not?
**[09:03] wom**
I have it! Here!
**[09:07] io**
Stop making noise.
**[09:08] ryuu**
You're not cut out for that.
**[09:09] yumoto**
Come on, everyone, think seriously!
**[09:12] ryuu**
There are things you think seriously about?
**[09:14] io**
Those two will probably be fine,
even if we don't worry about it.
**[09:18] yumoto**
They won't be fine at all!
**[09:20] yumoto**
They said they didn't even want lunch!
**[09:22] yumoto**
You can't say you don't want food!
**[09:24] yumoto**
It's a serious affair!
**[09:25] ryuu**
Yeah, Yumoto never changes.
**[09:28] yumoto**
I keep thinking, but it
just makes my head hurt!
**[09:31] yumoto**
I'm gonna go!
**[09:32] wom**
Where?
**[09:33] yumoto**
To see them!
**[09:37] io**
Such determination...
Maybe we should learn from him.
***SIGN*** Kusatsu Kinshiro
Born September 12th
Blood Type A / Virgo
Hobbies: Archery
Likes: Sanjusangendo Temple,
Kintsuba, Amanatto
**[09:48] kusa**
What?
**[09:49] kusa**
Kinugawa and that guy?
**[09:51] ari**
It seems so.
**[09:52] gero**
Currently, Kinugawa is walking
to and from school by himself.
**[09:56] ari**
Yufuin comes to school,
but he barely attends class,
**[10:00] ari**
and I'm told that even when they
cross paths, they don't speak.
**[10:04] kusa**
I see.
**[10:09] gero**
Th-That's good, is it?
**[10:12] ari**
However,
**[10:14] ari**
the first year boy, Hakone Yumoto-kun,
**[10:17] ari**
is attempting to get them to reconcile.
**[10:20] gero**
I really dislike that little fluff-head.
**[10:22] gero**
He appears to lack any delicacy.
**[10:25] zun**
It seems the effects of the monster we
controlled are finally showing themselves.
**[10:31] zun**
This time, by placing the monster in an
establishment that humans use frequently,
**[10:36] zun**
we can distribute the negative
energy with greater efficiency.
**[10:40] ari**
And the stronger the friendship,
the greater the effect.
**[10:44] gero**
Fight-causing radio waves.
**[10:46] zun**
If we continue to destroy the bonds
between those who are close...
**[10:51] kusa**
Then we shall acquire the
wonderful world we've always wanted!
**[10:55] ari**
It's catching. The speech pattern is catching.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[11:00] yumoto**
How am I going to get them to make up?
**[11:03] ryuu**
If you're too persistent, won't it
just make the problem worse?
**[11:08] io**
Just telling them to make up
over and over lacks subtlety.
**[11:11] yumoto**
It's not just that!
**[11:13] yumoto**
I also asked what we're going to do
about the Battle Lovers and stuff.
**[11:16] wom**
Wh-What?
**[11:18] en**
I quit. It's a pain in the ass.
**[11:20] en**
Actually, it's always been a pain in the ass.
**[11:22] atsu**
I'll help out if you really need me,
**[11:24] atsu**
but I might not feel like
transforming for a while.
**[11:28] yumoto**
...they said.
**[11:29] wom**
I've had enough!
**[11:31] wom**
Is it always going to be one step forward
and one step back with you people?!
**[11:34] ryuu**
It's because you forced us to transform
without giving us time to object.
**[11:37] wom**
But to begin with,
I've been smelling it for a while.
**[11:40] wom**
The scent of some kind of
advanced scientific technology plot!
**[11:44] yumoto**
You're saying a monster is behind this?
**[11:45] wom**
Bingo!
**[11:47] io**
But we haven't received one
of those unpleasant alarms.
**[11:50] wom**
It could be too weak to detect,
or it could be a momentary power.
**[11:54] ryuu**
A stealth monster, huh?
**[11:56] yumoto**
Okay!
**[11:57] yumoto**
In that case, I'll go over the
school with a fine-toothed comb!
**[12:01] ryuu**
Why are you so determined
to do that kind of legwork?
**[12:04] io**
Running around randomly won't do any good.
**[12:06] yumoto**
But if we beat the monster, they'll make up!
**[12:09] yumoto**
I can't just stand around!
**[12:10] io**
If we consider people who might have
been affected by this, I do have a lead.
**[12:15] ryuu**
Kikuchi and Akutagawa from class A, right?
**[12:16] io**
So you noticed?
**[12:18] ryuu**
They've been arguing since that day, too, right?
**[12:20] yumoto**
Where are you going?
**[12:22] io**
To search for a monster.
**[12:24] ryuu**
Using our heads.
**[12:29] aku**
He's the one who decided to go shopping,
**[12:31] aku**
but once he got back
from the convenience store,
**[12:33] aku**
he got all angry, like, "what am I, your gofer?"
**[12:36] guy**
I was reading Chanporon
at the convenience store,
**[12:39] guy**
when he looked over at me and laughed.
**[12:41] guy**
And it occurred to me maybe
he was actually a Makachin fan,
**[12:43] guy**
and suddenly I couldn't stand it...
**[12:45] triplets**
Our friend went to the convenience store and...
**[12:48] guy**
I was at the convenience store when...
**[12:50] guy**
It was at the convenience store.
**[12:52] ryuu**
The enemy's a convenience store?
**[12:53] io**
It... seems so.
**[12:55] yumoto**
I'm gonna go check!
**[12:57] yumoto**
Atsushi-senpai! Atsushi-senpai!
**[12:59] yumoto**
Atsushi-sen-pai-sen!
**[13:01] atsu**
Paisen?
**[13:03] yumoto**
Did you go to the convenience store near
the school before your fight started?
**[13:07] atsu**
How did you know that?
**[13:08] yumoto**
You did?!
**[13:10] atsu**
En-chan went in to buy some bread.
**[13:13] yumoto**
That must be it!
**[13:14] yumoto**
The culprit is in the convenience store!
**[13:16] yumoto**
Spontaneous Love Making!
**[13:42] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[13:43] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[13:46] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[13:49] yumoto**
Oh, wait, it's just me!
**[13:52] yumoto**
Atsushi-senpai, I...
**[13:54] yumoto**
I swear I'll get you two to make up!
**[14:01] atsu**
It was a monster, then?
**[14:07] yumoto**
Pardon me!
**[14:09] owner**
Welcome—
**[14:10] owner**
Cosplay?
**[14:11] yumoto**
Is there a monster here?
**[14:13] owner**
A... monster?
**[14:14] owner**
No, I'm afraid we don't carry those here.
**[14:17] yumoto**
That's weird. This has to be the place.
**[14:24] owner**
Oh, that's my son.
**[14:26] owner**
He's taking time off from school...
**[14:29] yumoto**
I've got it!
**[14:30] yumoto**
Above the convenience store!
**[14:35] yumoto**
This is it! Pardon me!
**[14:41] yumoto**
What a big kotatsu...
**[14:46] monster**
Who are you?
**[14:49] yumoto**
Come out of there! I'm gonna love you!
**[14:51] monster**
No!
**[14:53] yumoto**
It's not good for you to stay locked up all day!
**[14:55] monster**
No!
**[14:57] yumoto**
Damn. In this case...
**[15:03] yumoto**
Love Stick!
**[15:07] yumoto**
Scarlet Lumiere!
**[15:12] ryuu**
Huh? Where's Yumoto?
**[15:13] atsu**
Is there a monster?
**[15:14] io**
No...
**[15:22] yumoto**
Did I go a little overboard?
**[15:32] en**
What's that?
**[15:37] en**
They're...
**[15:43] monster**
Ow, ow...
**[15:45] monster**
Th-The school...
**[15:49] yumoto**
What?
**[15:50] monster**
School...
**[15:52] monster**
No!
**[15:55] monster**
I hate school!
**[15:57] ryuu**
Look out!
**[16:04] yumoto**
This guy's stronger than he looks!
**[16:05] ryuu**
And he keeps getting bigger!
**[16:07] io**
He's the type that gets harder to
control as he gets angry, I guess.
**[16:11] atsu**
Give back En-chan!
**[16:15] atsu**
Epinard Hurricane!
**[16:21] monster**
What?
**[16:23] atsu**
Give back my can't-be-bothered, listless En-chan!
**[16:37] yumoto**
Epinard!
**[16:50] io**
What?
**[16:51] yumoto**
Cerulean-senpai!
**[16:54] atsu**
Cerulean...
**[16:55] en**
You need to eat more! You're too light!
**[16:57] atsu**
Huh?!
**[16:59] yumoto**
Yay! He's back to normal
even though we haven't beaten it!
**[17:02] en**
I'm not back!
**[17:04] en**
I'm not back...
**[17:06] en**
Even now, I'm really pissed off.
**[17:09] yumoto**
Then why...?
**[17:11] en**
I might be pissed off...
But even more than that...
**[17:14] en**
I'm furious at myself for nearly losing
my best friend to such a stupid fight!
**[17:29] monster**
D-Don't say "best friend"...
**[17:32] monster**
It's embarrassing!
**[17:38] atsu**
Cerulean!
**[17:40] monster**
Nyah nyah!
**[17:41] en**
What's embarrassing?
**[17:44] en**
Yourself, because you can't
call a best friend a best friend?
**[17:50] monster**
You piss me off!
**[17:56] en**
You idiot!
**[18:00] en**
Hey!
**[18:02] atsu**
I get it.
**[18:03] atsu**
This does make me want to pick a fight.
**[18:07] en**
Atsushi...
**[18:09] atsu**
But...
**[18:11] atsu**
Not right now!
**[18:16] en**
That's right!
**[18:41] atsu**
Epinard Hurricane!
**[18:43] en**
Cerulean Aqua!
**[18:50] monster**
Why? Why didn't my radio waves work on you?
**[18:54] en**
Hey! Use the Love Attack!
**[18:56] yumoto**
Huh? Oh, roger that!
**[18:59] yumoto**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[19:02] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[19:04] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[19:07] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[19:09] ryuu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[19:14] yumoto**
This time, you two can
deal out the finishing move!
**[19:17] en**
Okay, let's do it!
**[19:24] both**
Love Attack!
**[19:38] monster**
So... So cold...
**[19:40] monster**
My blanket...
**[19:43] en**
The cold you feel is something
no blanket can stave off.
**[19:47] atsu**
You understand that too, don't you?
**[19:51] both**
Love Shower!
**[20:00] monster**
What is this sensation?
**[20:04] monster**
Comfort... Healing...
**[20:06] monster**
I see... so this is... love.
**[20:12] both**
Love is over.
**[20:15] both**
Huh?
**[20:16] ryuu**
Isn't that the transfer student, Komi?
**[20:19] yumoto**
You know him?
**[20:20] ryuu**
Yeah.
**[20:21] ryuu**
He transferred here at the end of the first term.
**[20:24] io**
At the beginning of the second term,
he was out of school with the flu...
**[20:26] ryuu**
And he just stopped coming after that.
**[20:29] io**
His house is above a
convenience store, right?
**[20:31] en**
Hey.
**[20:35] en**
I'm really sorry!
**[20:37] en**
I'm really, really sorry!
**[20:39] en**
I know I wasn't myself,
but I was totally messed up!
**[20:41] atsu**
No, no, I'm the one who should apologize.
**[20:43] atsu**
I didn't even notice a monster was behind it.
**[20:45] en**
No, no, it's still my fault.
**[20:47] atsu**
No, no, I'm at fault, too.
**[20:49] en**
No, no, no, I'm triple at fault.
**[20:51] atsu**
No, no, I'm at fault cubed.
**[20:51] yumoto**
I feel like everything I did was wasted effort.
**[20:53] en**
No, no, no, no...
**[20:54] yumoto**
Oh well! It worked out okay!
**[20:57] ryuu**
Not a care in the world, huh?
**[20:58] io**
Maybe we should learn from him.
**[21:00] en**
Hey, don't cling to me.
**[21:02] atsu**
You're heavy!
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[21:10] yumoto**
That's right, I've been
completely forgetting my cuddles!
**[21:13] yumoto**
I'm sorry!
**[21:15] wom**
I wish you'd forgotten them forever!
**[21:17] ryuu**
Komi said his house was so old,
it was due for a remodeling anyway.
**[21:21] io**
That's very convenient...
I mean, quite a silver lining.
**[21:25] ryuu**
Once his house is cleaned up,
he says he'll have some friends over.
**[21:28] io**
That's nice.
**[21:30] io**
Even so...
**[21:32] en**
No, no. It's my fault
for erasing your save data.
**[21:35] atsu**
No, no. It's my fault for getting
to level 100 on a game you owned.
**[21:38] en**
No, no. It's my fault for getting
potato chips all over your bed.
**[21:41] atsu**
No, no. It's my fault for secretly
swapping my seat with yours in class
**[21:44] atsu**
just because mine was wobbly.
**[21:45] en**
What, seriously?
**[21:46] en**
No, no. It's my fault for secretly
looking at your cell phone.
**[21:47] both**
How long will they keep that up
before they're satisfied?
**[21:48] atsu**
Actually, yeah.
**[21:49] en**
Fine, I won't do it anymore.
**[21:51] wom**
I'm done for!
**[21:56] atsu**
En-chan, you're incredible.
**[21:58] en**
How so?
**[21:59] atsu**
You did something I could never do,
and totally offhanded. It's amazing.
**[22:02] en**
What's with you? What is it you want?
**[22:05] en**
Fruit milk?
**[22:06] atsu**
No, I already got some.
**[23:41] ari**
You know, people don't look at
you as much as you think they do.
**[23:44] ari**
Not that it matters to me at all.
**[23:46] ari**
Hey, let's eat some melon.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love is Stronger than Pride
**[23:48] ari**
Next time: Love is Stronger than Pride.
**[23:51] ari**
Conquest!
# 9 - Love is Stronger than Pride
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** Student Council Room
**[00:09] kusa**
Arima. Be quiet.
**[00:11] ari**
Oh, sorry. Shall I make some tea?
**[00:14] kusa**
If I want some, I'll tell you.
**[00:15] gero**
Is it because second term's starting?
**[00:18] gero**
Is it because of them?
**[00:20] gero**
Is that why you're feeling grumpy, President?
**[00:23] kusa**
You're calling me grumpy?
**[00:25] kusa**
Have I done something to
annoy you, Gero Akoya-kun?
**[00:31] gero**
You only use my last name like that
when you're feeling grumpy, President.
**[00:36] kusa**
I'm afraid you're wrong about that, Gero-kun.
**[00:39] ari**
Oh, I know!
**[00:41] ari**
I'll bring out the dacquoise
I've been holding on to.
**[00:44] kusa**
No.
**[00:44] gero**
No thank you.
**[00:45] ari**
But at times like this...
**[00:47] kusa**
What do you mean...
**[00:48] gero**
..."times like this"?
**[00:49] ari**
Oh... Well...
**[00:51] both**
What is it?
**[00:52] zun**
I have had enough of this!
**[00:55] zun**
Members of the Caerula Adamas.
**[00:57] zun**
Our Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms
Project has reached a serious problem.
**[01:02] zun**
We still have not identified the enemy,
**[01:04] zun**
and they block every one of our plans.
**[01:07] kusa**
Our most recent plan, as well...
**[01:10] kusa**
It means our present strategy is not effective.
**[01:14] zun**
Aurite is correct.
**[01:16] zun**
I cannot afford to waste any more of
my precious Zundar Needles like this.
**[01:20] zun**
We must fundamentally rethink our strategy.
**[01:23] ari**
Precious?
**[01:24] gero**
Fundamentally?
**[01:25] zun**
That's right!
**[01:27] zun**
Instead of waiting for them to appear,
we shall go on the offensive!
**[01:30] kusa**
Go on the offensive?
**[01:33] zun**
A new development awaits us!
***SIGN*** Love is Stronger than Pride
**[03:15] guy**
It happened before, too.
He does such weird things by himself.
**[03:19] guy**
He really can't read the mood.
**[03:22] guy**
Or maybe it's that he *doesn't* read the mood?
**[03:24] ---**
Yeah, could be...
**[03:26] uri**
*What are they talking about?*
**[03:28] uri**
*No,* who *are they talking about?*
***SIGN*** Makuwa Uriya
**[03:31] uri**
*What kind of person must one be*
**[03:33] uri**
*to come up in their conversation?*
**[03:35] uri**
* The bold type that doesn't read*
* the mood, but pretends he just can't?*
**[03:38] uri**
* The self-centered type that can't read*
* the mood, but pretends he just doesn't?*
**[03:42] uri**
*A hybrid between them?*
**[03:44] uri**
I only know one person like that.
**[03:48] uri**
Someone who, despite caring what others think,
**[03:50] uri**
views showing that interest as a sign of failure.
**[03:53] uri**
Yes.
**[03:54] uri**
That is...
**[03:56] guy**
Should we go?
**[03:57] guy**
Let's go.
**[04:00] uri**
*I know. I really do know.*
**[04:03] uri**
*I'm excessively self-conscious.*
**[04:06] uri**
*No one really cares what I do.*
**[04:08] uri**
* No, I'm the one who's*
* weird for caring about that.*
**[04:10] uri**
* Actually, it's caring about it that*
* makes me excessively self-conscious.*
**[04:13] uri**
*I feel like my mind's racing in circles.*
**[04:15] uri**
*Do I want to care or not?*
**[04:17] uri**
*Do I want to act like I care or not?*
**[04:19] uri**
*And* should* *I care or not?*
**[04:21] aur**
Makuwa Uriya.
**[04:23] arg**
Monster of ego.
**[04:24] per**
You'll make an appropriate
servant to the Caerula Adamas.
**[04:29] uri**
What's going on? Is this a delusion?
**[04:32] uri**
Or a prank?
**[04:34] uri**
No, it must be a delusion.
**[04:35] uri**
After all, I'm not exactly famous
enough to be the subject of a prank.
**[04:39] uri**
But what if, by chance, someone films
this and the video is put on the internet,
**[04:40] kusa**
Aurum!
**[04:41] ari**
Argentum!
**[04:43] gero**
Perla!
**[04:43] uri**
and this becomes my world debut,
and I become surprisingly popular?
**[04:47] trio**
Donum!
**[04:50] uri**
That's right!
**[04:51] uri**
I'm not some ordinary gourd *(uri)*,
but a special melon!
**[04:54] uri**
Yes, a muskmelon!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[05:06] ryuu**
Hey!
**[05:07] ryuu**
So who came up with the name
"Earth Defense Club," anyway?
**[05:10] atsu**
Who knows? It's been called that
since I started coming here.
**[05:14] ryuu**
Well, not like it matters.
**[05:16] en**
If it doesn't matter, don't ask.
**[05:17] ryuu**
Yufuin-senpai, is that manga interesting?
**[05:21] en**
Occasionally.
**[05:22] ryuu**
Which means it's usually boring, then?
**[05:25] io**
Sounds like your relationships with girls.
**[05:28] ryuu**
Occasionally interesting.
**[05:30] ryuu**
The memories are priceless.
**[05:32] io**
Don't make me laugh.
**[05:34] en**
I'm impressed you two can hang out.
**[05:37] ryuu**
*You're* saying that, Yufuin-senpai?
**[05:39] en**
What does that mean?
**[05:41] atsu**
You mean me and En-chan?
**[05:43] en**
Speaking of which, why
do you hang out with me?
**[05:47] atsu**
*You're* asking that?
**[05:49] ---**
Yeah.
**[05:50] atsu**
Why...? It just went that way, I guess?
**[05:53] en**
Wow. That's mean.
**[05:54] atsu**
You asking me why was pretty mean, too.
**[05:57] en**
Well, to me, Atsushi, you're basically air.
**[06:01] atsu**
Is that a compliment?
**[06:02] en**
It's a huge compliment.
**[06:04] atsu**
Is it?
**[06:09] yumoto**
Yo!
**[06:10] en**
Why are you coming in from there?
**[06:12] yumoto**
And down!
**[06:14] yumoto**
I think a change of mood is a good thing sometimes.
**[06:16] atsu**
What do you mean, change of mood?
**[06:18] atsu**
I'd really like to hear about this.
**[06:20] yumoto**
Just kidding. It's a joke.
**[06:22] yumoto**
It's because Wombat ran away!
**[06:24] en**
He should just give up and
surrender himself to you already.
**[06:27] yumoto**
That's right!
**[06:29] ryuu**
What do you even like about that bristly thing?
**[06:31] io**
He stinks, too.
**[06:33] wom**
I am not bristly, nor do I stink!
**[06:37] yumoto**
Oh, now look! Wom-san is pouting! Poor thing!
**[06:42] yumoto**
Well, *I'm* still on your side, okay?
**[06:45] en**
But if Yumoto was chasing you,
why did you show up after he did?
**[06:50] atsu**
And where's Mr. Tawarayama?
**[06:53] atsu**
Did you leave him again?
**[06:54] wom**
He's right here!
**[06:56] en**
Hey, rigor mortis is setting in!
**[06:58] atsu**
Who hung that bag on him?
**[07:00] yumoto**
Oh, that's mine!
**[07:02] en**
I wish you'd share a hundredth of the concern
you have for Wombat with Mr. Tawarayama.
**[07:10] wom**
It's the Love Alert!
**[07:13] en**
I'm sick of arguing about
whether we should go or not.
**[07:15] en**
Might as well just go.
**[07:17] atsu**
Let's zip over there and zip right back.
**[07:19] wom**
Stop treating this like a rush job!
**[07:27] en**
There he is!
**[07:29] melon**
I've been waiting, Battle Lovers!
**[07:33] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[07:36] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[07:38] io**
Love is all!
**[07:40] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[07:43] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[07:45] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[07:48] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[07:50] five**
Of love!
**[07:52] yumoto**
Now, let's go right to the Love Attack!
**[07:55] melon**
Why don't we have a little talk?
**[07:57] yumoto**
A talk? About the jealousy, envy,
and inferiority you feel towards us?
**[08:02] melon**
Yes, that might make a good theme.
**[08:05] melon**
Jealousy, pity, and envy are three of a kind,
cooking poison in the same pot.
**[08:10] en**
What? Is today's monster a wannabe scholar?
**[08:14] en**
Epinard, I leave this sort of
self-sufficient type to you.
**[08:18] atsu**
Huh? Why?
**[08:19] en**
It seems like your strong point.
**[08:21] yumoto**
I'll beat him down with my
unique communication skills!
**[08:26] atsu**
You can't call it communication
if you're trying to beat him down.
**[08:29] atsu**
First, we have to be quiet and hear his side.
**[08:31] yumoto**
Huh? Grumble grumble.
**[08:33] atsu**
Don't say "grumble grumble."
**[08:35] en**
So what do you have to say?
**[08:39] melon**
The "Andes" in "Andes melon" doesn't
refer to the Andes Mountains.
***SIGN*** Scroll of Riddles
**[08:44] melon**
Did you know that?
**[08:47] melon**
The "Andes" in "Andes Melon" doesn't
refer to the Andes Mountains.
**[08:50] melon**
The truth is...
**[08:51] yumoto**
Yeah? Yeah?
**[08:53] melon**
The "Prince" in "Prince melon"
doesn't refer to royalty.
**[08:56] melon**
The truth is...
**[08:57] yumoto**
Yeah? Yeah?
**[08:58] melon**
Melons are not really fruit. The truth is...
**[09:02] yumoto**
Yeah? Yeah?
**[09:04] melon**
Are you interested?
**[09:06] melon**
If you want to know the truth, you'll
have to come to Mt. Binan on Sunday.
**[09:12] melon**
We shall meet again, friends of my soul!
**[09:15] yumoto**
What, you're not gonna tell us now?
**[09:17] yumoto**
No fair!
**[09:20] ryuu**
The "Andes" in "Andes melon"
**[09:23] ryuu**
comes from "anshin desu" (don't worry)
with the core (shin) removed.
**[09:26] ryuu**
A play on the fact that it's a melon with seeds.
**[09:28] ---**
Wow!
**[09:29] ryuu**
The "Prince" in "Prince melon"
**[09:31] ryuu**
is named after the group that
developed the seeds in a lab.
**[09:34] ---**
Wow!
**[09:36] ryuu**
"Fruit," according to the Ministry
of Agriculture and Forestry,
**[09:39] ryuu**
is something that grows into a tree,
**[09:40] ryuu**
whereas melons are herbaceous,
growing at the soil level,
**[09:43] ryuu**
which makes them fruit-like vegetables.
**[09:45] ---**
Wow!
**[09:47] ryuu**
By the way, the "musk" in "muskmelon"
**[09:49] ryuu**
doesn't come from the fact
that it appears to have a mask,
**[09:50] en**
You can look up anything on
the internet nowadays, huh?
**[09:53] ryuu**
but because it produces a
strong aroma known as "musk."
**[09:54] atsu**
And that monster seemed so confident
as it threw those riddles at us.
**[09:56] ---**
Wow! Wow!
**[09:58] ryuu**
One other thing: the mesh pattern
of a muskmelon is scars!
**[10:02] ryuu**
It's because of fractures that occur in
the rind as the fruit within is growing.
**[10:06] yumoto**
Wow!
**[10:08] en**
I wish the monster could have seen that "Wow!"
**[10:12] atsu**
He probably would've been
pretty pleased with himself.
**[10:14] io**
He probably thought he could lure
out someone like Yumoto that way.
**[10:19] yumoto**
Lure me out? What do you mean, Io-senpai?
**[10:22] io**
Yumoto, you really are carefree.
**[10:26] io**
Listen to me. The enemy's plan is...
**[10:29] zun**
To set a trap for them and strike!
**[10:31] zun**
That is our plan this time!
**[10:33] kusa**
We've been one step
behind them all this time.
**[10:36] zun**
This time, we shall annihilate the enemy.
**[10:39] zun**
It's a truly delicious idea.
**[10:43] ari**
By the way, Lord Zundar.
**[10:45] ari**
Is that thing you're eating right now a sn—
**[10:48] kusa**
Is that escargot?
**[10:50] ari**
No, it's a snail!
**[10:55] zun**
The foods of Earth are delicious.
**[10:58] zun**
This time, at last, our victory is assured!
**[11:02] wom**
An ambush?!
**[11:04] wom**
What a lovelessly dirty trick!
**[11:07] ryuu**
Regardless of the ambush,
just getting there would be a pain.
**[11:11] yumoto**
You mean you guys aren't planning to go?
**[11:15] ryuu**
You're saying you *are* planning to go?
**[11:16] yumoto**
Well, he did say, "We shall meet again!"
We solved his melon riddles, but still...
**[11:21] ryuu**
How far are you willing
to go to humor someone?
**[11:23] en**
It's not like we told him we'd go, so we're safe.
**[11:26] io**
That's right.
**[11:28] ---**
What?
**[11:28] wom**
Wait a minute!
**[11:30] wom**
The heirs to the throne of love,
the Battle Lovers, can't simply—
**[11:33] en**
But it'll be tiring, and baths cost money.
**[11:36] atsu**
You can't spend money you don't have.
**[11:40] io**
Why are you looking at me?
**[11:42] en**
I think Wombat's trying to
ask you to pay our way there.
**[11:46] io**
Now, look...
**[11:47] ryuu**
If you try to borrow money from Io,
your friendship with him is over.
**[11:51] wom**
In this situation, I suppose that cannot be helped.
**[11:54] wom**
In the name of love—
**[11:55] io**
Are you saying friendship isn't love?!
**[11:59] kino**
In that case, I know a very good way!
***SIGN*** Arima Ibushi
Born November 10th
Blood Type AB / Scorpio
Hobbies: Backgammon
Likes: Gardening,
carbonated rice crackers
**[12:10] ryuu**
Ugh, it's you! Where did you come from?
**[12:13] kino**
How rude of me!
**[12:14] kino**
I overheard your conversation.
**[12:17] en**
Overheard...?
**[12:19] kino**
If you're having money troubles,
**[12:21] kino**
our Press Society feels it is of
*pressing* urgency to come to your aid!
**[12:27] atsu**
Press Society...
**[12:28] ryuu**
...and pressing urgency?
**[12:30] en**
Was that a joke?
**[12:31] kino**
We have a very good idea.
**[12:33] kino**
A surefire way to make a fortune in no time!
**[12:36] yumoto**
What is it?
**[12:37] kino**
Do you remember?
**[12:39] kino**
Our Press Society published your Earth
Defense Club activities on the internet.
**[12:44] atsu**
Well, yeah...
**[12:46] en**
That's right, that did happen.
**[12:48] kino**
That article was a big hit!
***SIGN*** Yumoto-kun's cuuuuuute!
***SIGN*** Yes, he's an angel!
***SIGN*** En is way too hot
***SIGN*** Atsushiiiiiiiiii
**[12:51] kino**
Right now, you all are internet idols!
***SIGN*** Io-kun Io-kun Io-kun Io-kun
***SIGN*** Yumoto-kun Yumoto-kun Yumoto-kun
***SIGN*** I love glasses!
**[12:54] all**
Huh?!
**[12:56] atsu**
Internet idols?
**[12:57] atsu**
Isn't that term a little vague?
**[13:01] en**
I know the words "internet" and "idols,"
**[13:03] en**
but when you put them together,
suddenly it all feels very indeterminate.
**[13:07] kino**
Don't think about it too hard!
**[13:09] kino**
The point is, you're popular!
**[13:13] kino**
I've received a lot of requests for more
coverage of that five-man hottie group!
**[13:19] yumoto**
You want us to do something
to Mr. Tawarayama again?
**[13:22] kino**
No, no, no! I'm speaking more of gravure.
**[13:27] all**
Gravure?!
**[13:28] kino**
If you agree to be my models...
**[13:33] kino**
I could probably pay you this much.
**[13:36] atsu**
No way!
**[13:37] io**
That's not possible!
Are you trying to scam us?
**[13:40] kino**
Do not underestimate your own popularity!
**[13:43] kino**
If you sell well, I might be
able to pay you even more!
**[13:46] yumoto**
Wow!
**[13:48] kino**
Then, first, take these.
**[13:54] taz**
Good! Good! Yumocchan, you're amazing!
**[13:58] yumoto**
Oh, am I?
**[13:59] taz**
Magnum!
**[14:01] taz**
Great shot!
**[14:02] taz**
Perfect!
**[14:03] en**
Was the Press Society photographer
always that kind of character?
**[14:06] taz**
A little bit of blur...
**[14:08] kino**
And now, the rest of you!
**[14:18] taz**
Good! Nice! Yes, straighter!
**[14:20] taz**
Right! Good!
**[14:21] en**
Wait! This is all just cosplay!
**[14:25] kino**
It's part of a plan to put pictures of the
Earth Defense Club wearing various costumes
**[14:29] kino**
in calendars and sell them like hotcakes!
**[14:32] en**
Who would buy something like that?
**[14:34] atsu**
You know, it's like those calendars with
burly firemen and athletes in various poses.
**[14:39] ryuu**
I've heard of those.
**[14:40] io**
I feel vaguely like I've sold my soul.
**[14:44] kino**
Money talks, even in hell.
**[14:47] kino**
Well, would you like your receipt?
**[14:50] kino**
As thanks for the photos.
**[15:01] yumoto**
Those Press Society guys are really great!
**[15:03] yumoto**
These rice balls are delicious!
**[15:05] yumoto**
Thanks, big bro!
**[15:07] yumoto**
Cards! I wanna play Old Maid!
**[15:09] yumoto**
Then we'll play shiritori!
**[15:11] yumoto**
And the Yamanote Line game!
**[15:12] yumoto**
Oh, there's not enough time!
**[15:14] en**
He's sure excited.
**[15:16] ryuu**
Damn, persistent caller.
**[15:18] io**
Did something happen?
**[15:24] yumoto**
The air is so fresh!
**[15:26] en**
We finally made it.
***SIGN*** Binan Mountain Station
**[15:30] ryuu**
She doesn't believe I'm really
away on club business.
**[15:32] io**
That's only natural.
**[15:34] ryuu**
That's so cold! Take a selfie with me, okay?
**[15:37] io**
Sure, but won't she think it's
just a badly shopped photo?
**[15:44] ryuu**
Girls are cute, but they're
really annoying at times.
**[15:48] en**
Really? At times?
**[15:50] ryuu**
Well, I think of the annoyance
as part of their cuteness.
**[15:53] en**
Amazing.
**[15:54] en**
Anyway, so we have to climb this?
**[16:01] atsu**
If someone says to meet on Mt. Binan,
they'd normally mean the summit, right?
**[16:07] en**
Can we transform?
**[16:08] wom**
Oh? Have you finally recognized
yourselves as the Battle Lovers?
**[16:12] en**
No, but our physical skills increase
when we transform, right?
**[16:15] en**
I thought it'd make it a little easier.
**[16:18] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[16:21] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[16:23] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[16:25] five**
Of love!
**[16:31] en**
Or so I thought, but I guess not.
**[16:34] atsu**
En-chan, you never exercise effort,
spirit, or endurance, do you?
**[16:38] en**
Yeah. I'd rather be a lifetime idler.
**[16:42] en**
That was close! What is this thing?
**[16:44] atsu**
A sinkhole, maybe?
**[16:47] en**
Now I'm even more tired.
**[16:52] en**
By the way, Atsushi, what do
you want to do in the future?
**[16:55] atsu**
Me? I'm not sure.
**[16:58] atsu**
Go to college and get a job
like most people, I guess?
**[17:01] atsu**
Io, are you going to the Cayman Islands?
**[17:02] io**
There's no retiring from
investment and management, after all.
**[17:05] ryuu**
Well, I'm gonna become Hugh Hefner!
**[17:07] io**
I don't know about that.
**[17:09] yumoto**
I'm gonna become the world's
#1 bath-firewood man!
**[17:12] en**
Isn't your family's pubilc bath a *natural* hot spring?
**[17:15] yumoto**
That's true, but "bath-washer man"
doesn't have as nice a ring to it.
**[17:19] ryuu**
What is all this, anyway?
**[17:24] yumoto**
Hey!
**[17:25] yumoto**
Hey, Melon Monster!
**[17:29] yumoto**
We're here!
**[17:32] melon**
Wh-What are you doing here?!
**[17:34] yumoto**
You told us to come!
**[17:36] melon**
Well, yes, but on the way up, I set all those...
**[17:40] atsu**
Oh, you mean that survival action stuff?
**[17:43] yumoto**
That was pretty fun! Thanks!
**[17:46] ryuu**
No, I don't think he put
those there for us to enjoy.
**[17:49] yumoto**
Oh, really?
**[17:53] melon**
You may be my enemy, but I am impressed!
**[17:54] atsu**
Looks like he bounced back.
**[17:57] melon**
You must be very interested in
the melon riddles I threw at you.
**[18:01] yumoto**
Yeah. Actually, we figured
them all out using the internet.
**[18:04] melon**
What?!
**[18:05] yumoto**
"Anshin desu," the name of a group,
and fruit-like vegetables.
**[18:09] yumoto**
Also "musk" and scars.
**[18:10] melon**
It can't be... No...
**[18:12] melon**
You solved my melon riddles so easily?!
**[18:15] yumoto**
Also, sorry...
**[18:17] yumoto**
I'm the kind of person who doesn't really
care if he gets melon after dinner or not.
**[18:20] en**
Same here, actually.
**[18:22] atsu**
It's just another gourd, anyway.
**[18:24] ryuu**
I prefer cherries.
**[18:26] ryuu**
Not American cherries, but Sato Nishiki.
**[18:29] io**
Those are more expensive too, right?
**[18:31] melon**
*It can't be... You don't care about melons?*
**[18:36] melon**
It's melon, you know? *That* melon!
**[18:38] yumoto**
Sorry.
**[18:40] yumoto**
If you give me some, I *will* eat it, of course.
**[18:42] melon**
What an apathetic reaction!
**[18:44] melon**
You've shaken my entire raison d'etre!
**[18:48] en**
He's suffering.
**[18:50] atsu**
Really suffering.
**[18:51] ryuu**
Why are you talking about
"raison d'etre," anyway?
**[18:55] melon**
J-Just kidding. I knew that, too.
**[18:58] melon**
The melon is a relic of the past.
**[19:01] melon**
I was just playing melon.
**[19:03] melon**
Because they say melons are tops, you know?
**[19:06] yumoto**
Playing melon? Melons are tops?
**[19:08] melon**
In the same way bananas started
to sell out in an instant,
**[19:12] melon**
and the way people started to say that eggs
are the honor student of foodstuffs,
**[19:15] melon**
even thinking of melons as
having value is a total anachronism.
**[19:16] atsu**
Is this guy okay? He's getting
into self-abuse now...
**[19:20] melon**
I knew all that,
**[19:21] melon**
but when you say that, it just makes
people worry about you, you know?
**[19:25] melon**
So the melon was just playing melon!
**[19:28] en**
Who is he even talking to?
**[19:30] ryuu**
Himself, I think?
**[19:32] io**
He seems desperate to bounce back from this.
**[19:34] melon**
I'm not special at all,
**[19:36] melon**
but whether you're expecting
me to be special or not,
**[19:40] melon**
I'd still like to meet your expectations,
or something like that.
**[19:43] melon**
Have you ever met someone so willing to
think things down two or three levels?
**[19:48] melon**
Or something like that!
**[19:49] yumoto**
What's he talking about?
**[19:51] en**
In a word, he's excessively self-conscious?
**[19:54] atsu**
That's likely.
**[19:55] melon**
Likely?!
**[20:00] yumoto**
I don't really understand, but don't sweat it.
**[20:04] yumoto**
No worries!
**[20:04] melon**
No worries?!
**[20:06] yumoto**
That's right. We did come, after all.
**[20:09] melon**
You took pity on me!
**[20:11] yumoto**
This is a nice place. I'm glad we came.
**[20:15] yumoto**
We owe you, Melon Monster.
**[20:17] yumoto**
If not for you, I would never have
given a second thought to melons.
**[20:22] yumoto**
I'm glad.
**[20:25] yumoto**
I like melon-flavored shaved ice and such.
**[20:29] en**
And melon bread.
**[20:30] atsu**
And melon soda, too.
**[20:32] io**
The cheap stuff has its own appeal.
**[20:34] ryuu**
And everything has its own flavor.
**[20:49] melon**
So you don't mind a melon like me?
**[20:52] yumoto**
Why would we mind?
**[20:56] wom**
Everyone, now! Give him love!
**[20:59] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[21:09] melon**
Ah, the synergistic effect
of comfort and healing!
**[21:12] melon**
100% fruit juice is soaking into my scars!
**[21:15] melon**
I don't need to stay in a
paulownia box any longer!
**[21:21] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[21:25] zun**
The presence has disappeared.
**[21:27] zun**
So he's been loved, as well?
**[21:29] gero**
A shame.
**[21:31] kusa**
Forgive us, Lord Zundar.
**[21:33] kusa**
It seems our selection was ill-considered.
**[21:35] zun**
But it did have a bit of an effect.
**[21:38] ari**
Effect?
**[21:39] zun**
Let's be satisfied with what we did for today.
**[21:44] zun**
After we take a brief rest,
we'll consider our next development.
**[21:49] zun**
With that, I bid thee farewell!
**[21:55] kino**
It looks like the gravure was popular.
**[21:58] kino**
I hope this will translate into numbers, as well.
**[22:02] kino**
Right?
**[23:40] gero**
Isn't it true that the more a person
thinks of himself as "cute,"
**[23:43] gero**
the blacker his heart must be?
**[23:45] gero**
How do I know that's true?
**[23:47] gero**
Well, it's true of me, after all!
**[23:50] gero**
Next time: Love is Glasses...
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love is Glasses...
**[23:53] gero**
Conquest!
# 10 - Love is Glasses...
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] ryuu**
Hey, that looks good. The daily special?
**[00:07] io**
Yes. When it comes to lunch,
**[00:09] io**
the cafeteria's daily special
is definitely the way to go.
**[00:11] io**
It's completely satisfactory in
terms of both value and flavor.
**[00:16] atsu**
You've been getting bread a lot, En-chan.
**[00:18] en**
Yeah. Everything else is just a pain.
**[00:21] atsu**
You should have some vegetables, too.
**[00:23] atsu**
Want some of this stew?
**[00:29] atsu**
Yumoto, is something wrong?
**[00:32] yumoto**
I don't seem to have any appetite.
**[00:36] ---**
What?!
**[00:39] wom**
It's unusual for you to have no appetite...
**[00:43] yumoto**
And today's the day my brother
Gora makes lunch for me, too...
**[00:49] en**
I guess unusual things do happen.
**[00:52] yumoto**
Huh? Now that I look closer, En-chan-senpai,
you have really long eyelashes...
**[00:58] en**
Atsushi, he's acting weird.
**[01:00] atsu**
Yeah, weird.
**[01:02] megawa**
Oh, look out!
**[01:04] yumoto**
Megawacchi...
**[01:06] megawa**
Huh? Yumoto-kun, your face is red.
**[01:09] atsu**
Now that you mention it...
**[01:10] ryuu**
Megawacchi?
***SIGN*** Megawa Rui
**[01:12] megawa**
I'm Yumoto-kun's classmate, Megawa Rui.
**[01:16] megawa**
I'm the manager of the baseball club.
**[01:18] megawa**
Nice to meet you!
**[01:21] ryuu**
R-Right...
**[01:23] megawa**
Yumoto-kun, do you have a cold?
They're going around lately.
**[01:26] yumoto**
But I've never caught a cold in my life.
**[01:30] megawa**
Why don't we check your temperature? Hang on.
**[01:33] megawa**
Here, a thermometer.
**[01:35] atsu**
He's a manager, all right.
**[01:40] megawa**
37°C?
**[01:41] yumoto**
Huh?
**[01:42] yumoto**
Wow! I've never reached 37°C before!
**[01:46] yumoto**
No wonder I feel so lightheaded!
**[01:49] atsu**
You feel lightheaded?
**[01:51] yumoto**
Yep. And it's throbbing, too.
**[01:54] io**
It does sound like a cold, then.
**[01:56] ryuu**
But I've never seen anyone
so happy about geting a cold.
**[02:02] en**
Atsushi, Yumoto really is acting weird.
**[02:05] atsu**
Yeah, he is.
**[02:06] megawa**
Yumoto-kun, why not leave early?
**[02:08] megawa**
Maybe you should just get some rest today.
**[02:11] yumoto**
Yay! Leave early! Hooray!
**[02:14] club**
Hey, Megawa.
**[02:16] megawa**
Yes?
**[02:17] megawa**
Well, I'll be going now. Take care!
**[02:21] yumoto**
Bye-bye, Megawacchi!
**[02:23] ryuu**
He seems like the really pleasant type.
**[02:26] io**
I bet he's really popular.
**[02:28] yumoto**
Bye-bye!
**[02:31] megawa**
* That's right. I have a very good,*
* pleasant disposition.*
**[02:34] megawa**
* I'm the #1 glasses boy first-year student*
* that everyone wants as their manager.*
**[02:38] megawa**
* In terms of cuteness, I'm easily a*
* match for any glasses-girl character.*
***SIGN*** Love is Glasses...
**[04:21] en**
It seems like Yumoto-kun has a cold,
so we brought him home.
**[04:25] goro**
What? Yumoto has a cold?
**[04:27] ryuu**
That's right.
**[04:29] io**
He has a fever of 37°C.
**[04:31] gora**
A fever?!
**[04:33] gora**
Heat up a bath! A bath!
**[04:35] en**
It's heated. This is a public bath, y'know.
**[04:37] gora**
Ice! Go to the snowy mountains to pick up ice!
**[04:40] atsu**
Isn't there ice in the freezer?
**[04:41] ryuu**
Where did "snowy mountains"
come from, anyway?
**[04:45] gora**
That's right, onions!
**[04:47] gora**
For a cold, you need onions!
**[04:48] gora**
Cooked onions!
**[04:50] io**
I don't get it.
**[04:52] ryuu**
Why onions?
**[04:53] yumoto**
Big bro Gora always says
onions are good for a fever.
**[04:58] en**
Really?
**[05:00] atsu**
Is that a folk remedy or something?
**[05:05] gora**
How's that, Yumoto?
**[05:07] yumoto**
Stinks of onions.
**[05:10] gora**
That's just fine.
**[05:12] yumoto**
I think I'm getting sleepy.
**[05:14] gora**
Sleep.
**[05:15] yumoto**
Okay.
**[05:17] atsu**
Kind of a strange sight, isn't it?
**[05:20] en**
I get what you mean.
**[05:22] gora**
My little brother has never once caught a cold.
**[05:27] gora**
He must be overexerting himself somehow.
**[05:30] atsu**
Well, he may have been a
little busy with club activities.
**[05:34] gora**
That doesn't explain such a high fever.
**[05:37] ryuu**
No, it's a mild fever.
**[05:38] io**
I think it's just an ordinary cold, myself.
**[05:40] gora**
A cold is a gateway to all kinds of illnesses.
**[05:43] gora**
For this to happen on my watch...
**[05:46] en**
It's okay, big brother. The fever's low.
**[05:50] atsu**
But I really am worried.
For Yumoto to be stuck in bed...
**[05:53] io**
They say fools don't catch colds, after all.
**[05:55] ryuu**
He said it out loud!
**[05:58] gora**
Yumoto, your big brother will save you!
**[06:06] atsu**
That was some pretty
amazing brotherly love, huh?
**[06:09] en**
I guess the Yumoto doesn't fall far from the tree.
**[06:11] wom**
Such a moving sight!
**[06:14] wom**
The reason Yumoto-san so
passionately dedicates himself to love
**[06:17] wom**
is because of the deep love from his
brother that envelops him every day!
**[06:21] wom**
Oh, how I wish I could scout that
brother for the Earth Defense Club!
**[06:26] ryuu**
You're *that* impressed?
**[06:27] io**
That's some show of emotion.
**[06:30] wom**
I'm absolutely welling over with emotion!
**[06:32] wom**
Although I am concerned
about Yumoto-san's fever...
**[06:37] ryuu**
Yo!
**[06:38] io**
Good morning.
**[06:40] en**
Hey.
**[06:41] atsu**
Morning.
**[06:42] yumoto**
Good day to you.
**[06:46] yumoto**
Senpai. Good day to you.
**[06:49] en**
"Good day to you"?
**[06:50] ryuu**
What's with the glasses?
**[06:52] yumoto**
Everything near me suddenly appeared too close.
**[06:55] atsu**
Wait, you *are* Yumoto, right?
**[06:56] yumoto**
Yes. I am Hakone Yumoto.
**[06:59] yumoto**
Lovely weather today, isn't it?
**[07:01] io**
By the way, has your fever gone down?
**[07:04] yumoto**
I still have a fever,
**[07:06] yumoto**
but my brother Gora brewed
some medicinal herbs for me.
**[07:09] yumoto**
I felt so pleasantly refreshed, I decided to come.
**[07:12] atsu**
But if you still have a fever,
you should rest, shouldn't you?
**[07:16] ryuu**
Your brother must've been worried, too.
**[07:18] yumoto**
I didn't tell him I was leaving,
so he doesn't know.
**[07:21] yumoto**
On such a pleasant day,
I simply couldn't stay in bed.
**[07:24] yumoto**
Well, excuse me!
**[07:28] atsu**
Am I the only one who's bothered by that?
**[07:30] en**
No, I think we're all bothered by that.
**[07:33] io**
Yeah. Yumoto's character has changed, hasn't it?
**[07:35] ryuu**
Do you think the fever knocked a screw loose?
**[07:37] goro**
Yumoto, I cooked some more onion.
**[07:42] gora**
Yumoto?
**[07:47] yumoto**
Ah, the gentlemen of the
Student Council. Good day to you.
**[07:54] yumoto**
Has your morning meeting finished?
**[07:56] ari**
Yes.
**[07:58] yumoto**
I'm glad to hear it. You do such fine work.
**[08:00] yumoto**
Pardon me.
**[08:03] ari**
That was that first-year boy
from the Defense Club, wasn't it?
**[08:05] gero**
Yes. He's always been a rather strange boy.
**[08:08] kusa**
Don't be led astray by fools.
**[08:10] kusa**
Every minute spent thinking
about them is wasted.
**[08:12] gero**
That's true.
**[08:13] ari**
Harsh.
**[08:18] yumoto**
Oh, Megawacchi. Good day to you.
**[08:22] yumoto**
Are you working hard at your
morning practice as always?
**[08:24] megawa**
Yeah.
**[08:25] megawa**
Yumoto-kun, are you feeling better now?
**[08:28] yumoto**
Yes. Thank you for yesterday.
**[08:30] yumoto**
Well, I'll be going to the classroom now.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[08:55] atsu**
What brought this on all of a sudden?
**[08:57] yumoto**
I've been concerned about
the mess for some time.
**[09:00] en**
You have?
**[09:02] wom**
Magnificent, Yumoto-san!
**[09:04] wom**
Cleaning is love that goes by the name "service"!
**[09:07] yumoto**
Yes!
**[09:09] ryuu**
What happened to him?
**[09:11] io**
I don't know.
**[09:13] en**
But his character has
completely changed, hasn't it?
**[09:16] atsu**
Yeah.
**[09:17] atsu**
Actually, remember what his brother said?
**[09:19] atsu**
"A cold is a gateway to all kinds of illnesses."
**[09:21] io**
What about it?
**[09:23] atsu**
You don't think Yumoto is
going though *that*, do you?
**[09:29] atsu**
The first fever he's had since he
was born has overloaded his brain?!
**[09:33] ryuu**
That's not possible. It was only 37°C.
**[09:36] en**
But it might not be out of the question.
**[09:38] io**
Yes. Maybe this is exactly what his
brother was afraid would happen.
**[09:42] yumoto**
Now...
**[09:43] yumoto**
Teacher, I'll clean you up nicely, too.
**[09:46] en**
What will we do if he stays like this?
**[09:49] ryuu**
Scary.
**[09:51] atsu**
But I wonder if he even *can*
go back to the old Yumoto.
**[09:54] io**
I don't know...
**[09:56] wom**
I think things are better this way.
**[09:59] wom**
When all is said and done,
he's overflowing with love!
**[10:04] en**
What happened?
**[10:05] yumoto**
I was cleaning up, and the bookcase fell apart.
**[10:08] atsu**
Oh, this was in pretty bad shape.
**[10:11] io**
But Mr. Tawarayama's been...
**[10:14] ryuu**
Teacher, hang in there!
**[10:15] ryuu**
Wait, he's dead already...
**[10:16] en**
Hey, look.
**[10:19] en**
I didn't know there was a door here.
**[10:26] gero**
Why are we remodeling all of a sudden?
**[10:29] ari**
Just a bit of feng shui.
**[10:32] gero**
I didn't know you were concerned
with such things, Arima-san.
**[10:34] ari**
I suppose I am.
**[10:35] kusa**
But...
**[10:38] kusa**
I didn't know there was a door here.
**[10:42] yumoto**
Okay! It's all clean!
**[10:47] yumoto**
Well, I'm going to go take out the trash.
**[10:58] yumoto**
Hello!
**[10:59] man**
Huh? Who's that?
**[11:02] yumoto**
Hello!
**[11:05] man**
Who's that guy?
**[11:07] man**
That's Hakone Yumoto, the first-year.
**[11:09] man**
He seems like a really nice guy.
**[11:11] man**
I wonder if we could get him to be our manager.
**[11:17] yumoto**
It feels so good getting things clean.
**[11:19] yumoto**
Now, then...
**[11:21] all**
Hakone Yumoto-kun!
**[11:23] man**
Yumoto-kun, would you
like to become our manager?
**[11:27] man**
Hold on! We saw him first!
**[11:30] man**
No, we saw him first!
**[11:32] man**
No, we did!
**[11:34] yumoto**
I'm sorry.
**[11:35] yumoto**
I'm grateful for your invitations,
but I have the Defense Club.
**[11:40] yumoto**
Please let me do my best where I am now.
**[11:43] all**
So cute!
**[11:46] crowd**
Yumoto-kun, join our club!
**[11:48] crowd**
Please, Yumoto-kun!
**[11:50] crowd**
You're welcome with us!
**[11:52] yumoto**
I told you, I can't.
**[11:55] man**
He's really popular.
**[11:56] man**
Is he really that good a guy?
**[11:58] man**
You think we could get him to be our manager?
**[12:05] man**
Oh, I didn't mean that we don't need you...
**[12:08] man**
Yeah. You do a great job, Megawa.
**[12:11] megawa**
I-It's okay. You don't have to defend me.
**[12:15] megawa**
It's my own fault for getting complacent,
**[12:17] megawa**
thinking I was the only
popular glasses character around.
**[12:25] gero**
His heart appears to be muddied by
panic, jealousy, and self-loathing.
**[12:30] ari**
Yes. I like him.
**[12:33] kusa**
Not bad.
**[12:35] kusa**
What do you think, Lord Zundar?
**[12:40] zun**
Fine, indeed.
**[12:41] zun**
He shall be our next target!
**[12:44] zun**
Go, Caerula Adamas!
**[12:46] both**
Yes, Lord Zundar!
**[12:53] megawa**
*Yumoto-kun...*
**[12:54] megawa**
* You rocketed to the position of first-year*
* student most desired as a manager.*
**[12:59] megawa**
*I envy you...*
**[13:00] megawa**
*No, I loathe you...*
**[13:02] megawa**
*That should be my position!*
***SIGN*** Gero Akoya
Born April 24th
Blood Type B / Taurus
Hobbies: Aromatherapy
Likes: Beautiful things,
macarons
**[13:20] yumoto**
Senpai!
**[13:22] atsu**
Yumoto. Where have you been?
**[13:24] yumoto**
A whole lot of sports clubs have
asked me to be their manager.
**[13:27] yumoto**
But my love for the Defense Club hasn't changed.
**[13:32] en**
Am I the only one who found
Yumoto really cute just now?
**[13:36] ryuu**
I thought so, too. Damn.
**[13:38] atsu**
Well, I've always thought
he was cute, as a kouhai.
**[13:41] io**
Yes, but only as a kouhai.
**[13:43] monster**
No!
**[13:49] monster**
The position of #1 boy in terms of
pleasant, cute, and manager material,
**[13:53] monster**
or PCM for short, is mine!
**[13:58] ryuu**
One of these, huh?
**[13:59] atsu**
But were you aware of "PCM"?
**[14:01] io**
No. And I don't understand what it means.
**[14:04] en**
Yeah. I can't get excited about this.
**[14:06] wom**
Don't be like that! Come on, everyone!
**[14:09] wom**
Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
**[14:11] en**
For heaven's sake...
**[14:14] en**
Love Making.
**[14:19] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[14:22] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[14:24] io**
Love is all!
**[14:26] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[14:29] atsu**
Wait, Scarlet's missing!
**[14:33] wom**
He's still over there!
**[14:35] monster**
Give back my position!
**[14:37] monster**
PCM Beam!
**[14:40] en**
Look out!
**[14:43] ryuu**
What's wrong, Yumoto? Transform already!
**[14:46] yumoto**
I can't "transform."
**[14:49] en**
No, no, no...
**[14:50] atsu**
You've done it plenty of times!
**[14:52] io**
You even took the initiative.
**[14:53] ryuu**
Yeah.
**[14:54] yumoto**
But I'm scared! Senpai, save me!
**[14:57] en**
What do we do about this?
**[14:59] ryuu**
Crap. For a moment there, I actually
thought about wanting to protect him!
**[15:02] wom**
If it's come to this, we should
force him to transform!
**[15:06] yumoto**
Please don't!
**[15:07] yumoto**
I don't want to transform! Senpai!
**[15:09] monster**
Why are you ignoring me to flirt with him?!
**[15:17] atsu**
Epinard Hurricane!
**[15:27] en**
Guys!
**[15:32] monster**
That's so mean. Coming at me all at once...
**[15:35] monster**
I don't even want to fight!
**[15:38] ---**
Huh?
**[15:39] io**
He's the one who's overwhelmingly stronger.
**[15:42] atsu**
Who the heck is this guy, anyway?
**[15:44] monster**
Position-wise, I'm a character
who should be protected!
**[15:49] monster**
I'm not the one who
should be on the front lines!
**[15:51] monster**
And yet... And yet...!
**[15:59] ryuu**
He's really strong!
**[16:00] io**
His reason for fighting is so absurd
that I can't predict his next move!
**[16:04] atsu**
Normally, Scarlet would say "It's okay!"
and change the tone of the fight, but...
**[16:08] yumoto**
Help me!
**[16:10] en**
Yeah, that.
**[16:11] monster**
Normally, at a time like this,
the others would come to save me!
**[16:16] monster**
That's my position, and yet...
**[16:21] all**
Megawa!
**[16:24] megawa**
Senpai...
**[16:26] man**
You okay, Megawa?
**[16:27] megawa**
Senpai...
**[16:28] man**
It's okay now!
**[16:29] man**
We'll protect you!
**[16:32] megawa**
Senpai...
**[16:33] monster**
So why do I have to be the one fighting?!
**[16:52] atsu**
He's so powerful...
**[16:54] io**
We're going to lose at this rate!
**[16:55] ryuu**
Damn.
**[16:57] wom**
I'm begging you! Please, transform!
**[17:00] yumoto**
I can't. I'm scared.
**[17:03] wom**
But if this keeps up, your friends
will be blown to smithereens!
**[17:07] yumoto**
But...
**[17:08] wom**
There's no choice. I'll use my ultimate weapon!
**[17:11] wom**
If you transform and fight,
you may cuddle me as much as you want!
**[17:16] wom**
Come on! Cuddle me!
Cuddle me to your heart's content!
**[17:20] yumoto**
Stop that! It's indecent!
**[17:23] monster**
Now, everyone. If you
don't want me to beat you,
**[17:26] monster**
you should protect me,
dote on me, be kind to me!
**[17:30] monster**
Come on. Come on. Come on!
**[17:33] en**
Just because you say "come on"...
**[17:35] monster**
If you don't, I'll beat all of you.
**[17:37] monster**
It's gonna hurt! You'll be ripped to shreds!
**[17:41] ryuu**
Damn.
**[17:42] en**
Why...?
**[17:45] monster**
If you don't want that,
then love me and only me!
**[17:48] monster**
Come on. Come on. Come on!
**[17:57] wom**
This isn't good.
**[17:58] wom**
We've never been in a situation this bad!
**[18:01] monster**
Come on, dote on me!
**[18:04] ryuu**
Damn... This is no joke!
**[18:06] io**
We'll never give in!
**[18:08] atsu**
That's right. We refuse!
**[18:11] en**
Yeah, we refuse.
**[18:13] en**
We've already got a cute kouhai to dote on.
**[18:17] wom**
He means you!
**[18:19] ryuu**
That's right. Our kouhai slot
has already been filled.
**[18:22] io**
He's all we need!
**[18:24] atsu**
And we have no plans to be swayed by another!
**[18:28] monster**
Then... Then... I'll beat you all!
**[18:30] monster**
I really will... I really will beat you all!
**[18:36] wom**
This... This is bad!
**[18:37] wom**
They're all... They're all going to be beaten!
**[18:46] yumoto**
I won't let it...
**[18:48] yumoto**
I won't let it happen!
**[18:50] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[18:55] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[18:56] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[18:58] yumoto**
Take this, Glasses Monster!
**[19:07] io**
Took you long enough.
**[19:09] atsu**
We've been waiting.
**[19:10] en**
Shall we do the usual, then?
**[19:13] yumoto**
Sure!
**[19:19] yumoto**
Let's go, Glasses Monster!
**[19:20] yumoto**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[19:23] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[19:25] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[19:28] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[19:30] ryuu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[19:46] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[19:53] monster**
Is cuteness a sin?!
**[20:02] yumoto**
You have a team who needs you, too.
**[20:06] yumoto**
Do your best in the place where you belong.
**[20:09] yumoto**
Love Shower!
**[20:18] monster**
What is this warmth?
**[20:21] monster**
I see... So this is love.
**[20:30] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[20:32] wom**
I'm so happy! You're back to your usual self!
**[20:38] en**
Come to think of it, I haven't seen
Tawarayama with you at all today.
**[20:41] en**
Are you sure this is okay?
**[20:43] ---**
Gulp!
**[20:44] ryuu**
I bet he's completely decomposed.
**[20:46] wom**
H-H-He'll be just fine, really.
**[20:53] kino**
Did you get that?
**[20:54] taz**
Perfect.
**[20:57] kino**
Lord Hireashi should be very pleased by this.
**[21:02] gora**
Yumoto!
**[21:05] goro**
Yumoto!
**[21:07] yumoto**
Big bro?
**[21:08] gora**
You shouldn't be here. You still have a fever.
**[21:11] yumoto**
Sorry I came to school without telling you.
**[21:15] gora**
You had me worried.
**[21:16] atsu**
Wait, shouldn't our highly
advanced camouflage prevent him
**[21:20] atsu**
from seeing our true identities?
**[21:22] en**
Does his brother know who we are?
**[21:24] atsu**
No way.
**[21:25] ryuu**
Then how'd he know that was his brother?
**[21:28] io**
Through the power of brotherly love, I guess?
**[21:35] gero**
We lost again...
**[21:37] ari**
And there's another strange one among them.
**[21:42] kusa**
That man... Exactly who is he?
**[21:46] hire**
Well, Kinosaki-chan?
**[21:48] hire**
Did you get a good shot?
**[21:50] hire**
Did you really?
**[21:53] hire**
Wow, we've been stuck in a rut all this time,
**[21:56] hire**
but this time it's perfect?
**[21:59] hire**
Can I really trust you?
**[22:01] hire**
Then once you get some good numbers,
**[22:03] hire**
we'll be eating sushi in Ginza,
if you know what I mean.
**[23:40] zun**
At last, our plan is entering the final phase!
**[23:44] zun**
Commander Hireashi, leave this to me.
**[23:46] zun**
I swear I shall bring results
that meet your expectations!
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** The Trial Called Love
**[23:50] zun**
Next time: The Trial Called Love.
**[23:52] zun**
Zundar!
# 11 - The Trial Called Love
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** The Trial Called Love
**[01:37] man**
Beniya, we don't have enough.
**[01:38] man**
Can we really finish this
with just three days to go?
**[01:41] man**
I'm hungry. Let's send for a shopping run.
***SIGN*** Binan High School
**[01:45] man**
The class or club that wins the
popularity vote gets a cash prize, right?
**[01:49] man**
Oh, that's right. That's what
the Press Society guys said.
**[01:53] man**
Speaking of which, I heard the
Press Society is broadcasting it.
**[01:55] man**
What do you mean, broadcasting?
***SIGN*** Binan High School Festival Grand Prix
***SIGN*** Who Will Win?!
**[01:57] man**
Like on the internet? Really?
**[02:00] kino**
Really!
**[02:03] kino**
Please allow our media to cover this!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[02:07] ryuu**
I told you, we should do a "how to date" class.
**[02:09] io**
No, we should have an
investment awareness campaign.
**[02:12] en**
I don't really want to participate
in this school festival stuff.
**[02:17] atsu**
I figured you'd say that, En-chan.
**[02:19] en**
It's such a pain in the ass, I want to die.
**[02:21] io**
What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
**[02:24] io**
There's a cash prize on the line.
**[02:26] io**
Why wouldn't you pick up
money just lying on the ground?
**[02:29] en**
Bending over is a pain in the ass.
**[02:31] ryuu**
He's hardcore lazy.
**[02:33] atsu**
But as long as we're being allotted
a club room and club budget,
**[02:36] atsu**
the student council says we have
to show the fruits of our activities.
**[02:39] yumoto**
Here! Here! Here here here!
**[02:42] yumoto**
A restaurant! We should do a restaurant!
**[02:44] en**
What is that, a kindergartner's dream?
**[02:46] io**
No, that's a pretty realistic idea for Yumoto.
**[02:50] io**
Do you know the cost of coffee, for example?
**[02:54] ryuu**
What, is it easy money?
**[02:55] io**
It also depends on our ability
to draw customers, though.
**[02:55] [SONG] sign**
In cold storage
Don't open!
**[02:58] en**
But everyone else is already gonna do
stuff like cafés and coffee shops.
**[03:02] io**
That's true. It would be hard
without a selling point.
**[03:05] ryuu**
We do have a selling point.
**[03:06] atsu**
We do?
**[03:09] ryuu**
Love Making!
**[03:13] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[03:14] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[03:17] ryuu**
That we're transforming heroes!
**[03:19] en**
No way.
**[03:21] en**
We've worked really hard to
hide our identities up to now.
**[03:24] en**
Revealing them for something like
this would make that all pointless.
**[03:27] ryuu**
Well, that's different.
**[03:29] ryuu**
Why don't we just get Wombat
to work something out
**[03:32] ryuu**
with his advanced scientific technology?
**[03:34] wom**
Hey! Wait a minute!
**[03:36] wom**
It would be unheard of for missionaries
of love to pursue for-profit ventures!
**[03:41] ryuu**
What are you saying?
**[03:43] ryuu**
If they eat delicious food,
they'll feel love and happiness, right?
**[03:47] ryuu**
It's a proper love activity. A "lovetivity."
**[03:51] wom**
Lovetivity...
**[03:52] atsu**
That's Ryuu for you.
**[03:54] atsu**
His sweet-talking technique is unsurpassed.
**[03:56] en**
Should you really be impressed by that?
**[03:57] atsu**
I was just thinking it'd be nice
to have a refrigerator, though.
**[04:01] en**
Why's that?
**[04:03] atsu**
Well, we'd always have cold drinks on hand.
**[04:06] atsu**
A microwave would be great, too.
**[04:08] en**
Are you all really into this restaurant idea?
**[04:10] ryuu**
Let's do it!
**[04:12] wom**
Lovetivity...
**[04:13] atsu**
Coffee, black tea, and cake, maybe?
**[04:16] en**
So it's decided that we're doing it, huh?
**[04:18] ryuu**
Love out.
**[04:21] yumoto**
I think we should serve sushi.
**[04:22] io**
Nope.
**[04:23] yumoto**
Why?
**[04:24] io**
It takes too much work.
**[04:26] io**
And we'd be handling raw fish.
**[04:29] io**
It would be bad for us if
any problems were to occur.
**[04:31] ryuu**
Yeah. It's dangerous to serve
stuff that isn't fully cooked.
**[04:35] yumoto**
Curry would be good, then.
**[04:37] ryuu**
This isn't just your decision, you know.
**[04:38] yumoto**
"I would like curry," then.
**[04:40] io**
If we do curry, we could make it in
the club room, then just heat it up.
**[04:44] en**
Atsushi makes good curry.
**[04:46] atsu**
I have to make it?
**[04:48] yumoto**
Kinugawa Curry! Yeah!
**[04:50] ryuu**
I can't stand Thai curry, though.
**[04:54] en**
Why? Because it's spicy?
**[04:56] ryuu**
Actually, it's the coconut milk.
**[05:00] ryuu**
I prefer thick home curry!
**[05:04] io**
Dry curry is quite good, too.
**[05:06] yumoto**
I like everything!
**[05:08] wom**
Exactly what kind of food is this "curry"?
**[05:14] yumoto**
I don't mind Thai curry, Atsushi-senpai.
**[05:18] yumoto**
Pork is my favorite, though.
**[05:20] atsu**
I have no idea what you're talking about.
**[05:23] yumoto**
Weren't you worrying about
what kind of curry to make?
**[05:27] yumoto**
Because your face looked like this.
**[05:30] atsu**
What? When?
**[05:32] atsu**
And I don't think I looked like that.
**[05:34] yumoto**
Do you actually not like curry?
**[05:37] yumoto**
Gratin or napolitan would be fine, too!
**[05:40] atsu**
No... I do like curry, but...
**[05:44] atsu**
I'm not sure...
**[05:45] atsu**
What was it?
**[05:47] yumoto**
It gives you heartburn?
**[05:48] atsu**
Maybe. Something about it just bothers me.
**[05:52] yumoto**
Then you should take a bath and go to sleep.
**[05:55] yumoto**
If you just take a bath,
most things will work themselves out!
**[05:58] yumoto**
That's what my big bro says.
**[06:00] atsu**
You're right. I guess I'll do that.
***SIGN*** Binan Festival
***SIGN*** My Essays
***SIGN*** Honey Lemon
**[06:22] ari**
When you make that expression,
**[06:24] ari**
it makes me start to feel melancholy, too.
**[06:27] kusa**
What kind of expression is that?
**[06:28] ari**
Like you've smelled something foul in the air.
**[06:31] gero**
Now that you mention it...
**[06:33] gero**
I've been smelling curry for a while now.
**[06:36] kusa**
I don't understand people who eat curry.
**[06:40] gero**
Doesn't everyone love curry?
**[06:42] gero**
Well, I suppose I wouldn't go
out of my way to eat it, either.
**[06:45] ari**
Why?
**[06:46] gero**
The dishes look less than
beautiful after you eat it.
**[06:50] kusa**
That's not the problem!
**[06:52] kusa**
The powerful stench.
The stimulation against the tongue.
**[06:54] kusa**
It's not something civilized
humans should be eating.
**[06:57] ari**
You're that against it?
**[06:59] kusa**
It's a thing we should object
to on the most basic level.
**[07:02] ari**
My, my.
**[07:04] ari**
I don't know about such a radical way of thinking.
**[07:07] kusa**
As the rightful rulers of this planet,
**[07:09] kusa**
we have the duty, the responsibility, and the right.
**[07:12] kusa**
By the way, I haven't seen Lord Zundar yet today.
**[07:16] gero**
He's been going out a lot lately.
**[07:18] ari**
Maybe it's mating season!
***SIGN*** Press Society
***SIGN*** Binan High School Festival
Grand Prix
***SIGN*** Who Will Win?!
**[07:26] hire**
There's no denying you're in a rut.
**[07:30] zun**
But I've been dedicated to
devising clever schemes every week...
**[07:33] hire**
That's not good enough!
**[07:35] hire**
The masses get bored easily.
**[07:38] zun**
I am aware of that.
**[07:39] hire**
But anyway, this planet
called Earth must be jinxed.
**[07:44] hire**
I mean, we've conquered a lot of planets, right?
**[07:48] hire**
Some of them have given
us some trouble, of course.
**[07:50] hire**
But we've conquered the
vast majority of them, right?
**[07:54] hire**
And yet the Earth alone...
**[07:56] hire**
Why is this the only place
where we've been canceled?
**[08:02] zun**
Canceled? What was the reason?
**[08:05] hire**
Because it didn't go well.
An obstacle got in the way.
**[08:08] zun**
Obstacle?
**[08:09] zun**
Still, I don't think the beings of this
planet possess any special abilities.
**[08:14] hire**
No, they do.
**[08:17] hire**
Stupid power.
**[08:19] zun**
They seem to call it "love," or some such...
**[08:22] hire**
It ain't love, stupid!
**[08:24] hire**
It's stupid power.
**[08:26] zun**
So what kind of soldiers do we need
to oppose this "stupid love power"?
**[08:31] hire**
Good question. We might need
an even more negative person.
**[08:36] zun**
Negative?
**[08:37] hire**
Yeah. Someone soggy, viscous,
and goopy who will really stick with it.
**[08:43] hire**
A human steeped in grudge and discontent.
**[08:50] yumoto**
Big bro, what's wrong?
**[08:52] yumoto**
You don't have your usual edge.
**[08:54] goro**
I-It's nothing.
**[08:57] gora**
Hey, there's something I want to ask you.
**[09:00] gora**
The other day, when you...
**[09:02] yumoto**
You mean the "first cold in my life" incident?
**[09:06] gora**
Yeah, that's right.
**[09:08] yumoto**
I don't remember it very well.
**[09:11] yumoto**
I was carrying a cleaning rag.
**[09:13] gora**
A cleaning rag?
**[09:14] yumoto**
Yeah. And for some reason, I had glasses.
**[09:16] gora**
Glasses?
**[09:17] yumoto**
And a baseball.
**[09:19] gora**
Really?
**[09:20] yumoto**
I think. Sorry if I'm wrong.
**[09:23] yumoto**
So what was it you wanted to ask me?
**[09:26] gora**
Well, Yumoto...
**[09:28] gora**
What do you think of transformation...
**[09:31] gora**
Deviation and such?
**[09:33] yumoto**
Deviation?
**[09:34] yumoto**
*Has he discovered some weird hobby?*
**[09:37] yumoto**
Well, I think it's fine!
**[09:40] yumoto**
People are free to do as they like.
**[09:43] yumoto**
As long as they aren't bothering
others, I'd encourage them.
**[09:46] gora**
I see.
**[09:49] yumoto**
Did he want me to stop him?
**[09:59] yumoto**
Let's eat!
**[10:01] all**
Eat!
**[10:07] yumoto**
It's good!
**[10:10] yumoto**
Curry's so good! Good curry!
**[10:13] ryuu**
Shut up and eat.
**[10:14] yumoto**
But don't you think the Kinugawa Curry is good?
**[10:17] ryuu**
It's not about that. It's because you're annoying.
**[10:19] en**
I'm more fascinated
**[10:22] en**
by the surrealism of Wombat eating curry.
**[10:26] wom**
Human know-how produces
such a condensed taste!
**[10:29] io**
300 yen for a plate of curry.
**[10:31] io**
And if we factor in the cash prize...
**[10:34] ryuu**
Wow, you seem confident we'll win.
**[10:36] io**
Of course I am.
**[10:38] yumoto**
Can we start now, then?
**[10:40] wom**
Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
**[10:45] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[11:12] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[11:13] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[11:16] en**
Love Making!
**[11:26] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[11:28] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[11:31] atsu**
Love Making!
**[11:41] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[11:42] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[11:45] io**
Love Making!
**[11:55] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[11:57] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[12:00] ryuu**
Love Making!
**[12:10] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[12:11] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[12:14] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[12:17] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[12:20] io**
Love is all!
**[12:22] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[12:25] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[12:27] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[12:29] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[12:32] five**
Of love!
**[12:35] en**
You really don't think they'll realize
**[12:37] en**
that we're the same people as those guys?
**[12:41] io**
The blur isn't on us, right?
**[12:43] atsu**
Will that be okay?
**[12:45] wom**
It's fine. My highly advanced scientific
technology has mumble mumble...
**[12:49] en**
What do you mean, "mumble mumble"?
**[12:51] yumoto**
Now, let's go get customers!
***SIGN*** Zundar
Born August 18th
(converted to Earth calendar)
Blood Type B / Leo
Hobbies: Secret
Likes: Escargot
**[13:00] yumoto**
Deliciousness that shakes the Earth!
**[13:02] yumoto**
Even an alien would be shocked!
**[13:04] guy**
Why are you dressed like that, Hakone?
**[13:05] yumoto**
We're transforming heroes!
**[13:07] yumoto**
You know, we've seen them around
the school a lot lately, right?
**[13:10] yumoto**
That weird group of five.
**[13:11] yumoto**
We're cosplaying as them!
**[13:13] io**
It's not a lie, I guess.
**[13:15] en**
And yet, it's a perfect cover story.
**[13:17] ryuu**
Yumoto's amazing.
**[13:19] yumoto**
Cosplay Hero Curry! Now on sale!
**[13:22] guy**
Cosplays, heroes, and curry?
Isn't that a bit too much at once?
**[13:26] yumoto**
Put on more! More and more and more!
**[13:29] en**
We don't have a choice.
I guess we'd better work, too.
**[13:32] en**
I don't want to have any leftovers.
**[13:33] ryuu**
Sure.
**[13:34] io**
Let's go.
**[13:35] en**
Atsushi, you handle the curry stock.
**[13:37] atsu**
Roger.
**[13:38] wom**
Give me something to do, too!
**[13:41] en**
Wombat, you and Mr. Tawarayama watch the store.
**[13:45] wom**
I accept!
**[13:48] tawara**
Defense curry.
**[13:51] tawara**
It's good.
**[13:53] en**
Okay.
**[13:54] en**
A little more enthusiasm.
**[13:56] wom**
Why do I have to suffer such poor treatment?
**[13:59] en**
Mr. Tawarayama can't help
unless both his hands are free.
***SIGN*** Defense Club Curry 300 yen
**[14:02] wom**
Even so...
**[14:04] en**
Well, you can't go away from him.
**[14:06] wom**
But...
**[14:07] ryuu**
Sir, you're not doing any work.
**[14:15] atsu**
It's still got an edge to it.
**[14:18] atsu**
Oops.
**[14:20] kusa**
Foolish humans who lack ambition
or aspiration have no right to exist.
**[14:25] kusa**
They are worthless.
**[14:28] kusa**
I will purge ugly things, foolish things,
and worthless things from the world.
**[14:34] kusa**
The world should be orderly, beautiful, and regular.
**[14:40] kusa**
And yet, what is this curry stench?
**[14:43] kusa**
Why is it drifting in from over here?
**[14:54] atsu**
Um...
**[14:56] atsu**
Want some?
**[14:57] kusa**
Who would stoop to eating something so humble?!
**[15:06] atsu**
Kin-chan?
**[15:07] kusa**
Do not call me by that name.
**[15:09] atsu**
Kin-chan, you're our enemy? That can't be true.
**[15:17] kusa**
Truly base and vulgar.
**[15:19] kusa**
Its wicked stimulation poisons the sense
of taste and destroys the sense of smell.
**[15:23] kusa**
Worse, its offensive appearance
mocks the sense of sight.
**[15:27] kusa**
I cannot fathom a person like you
who can this thing known as curry,
**[15:31] kusa**
Kinugawa Atsushi.
**[15:35] atsu**
No. My name is...
**[15:37] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[15:40] kusa**
I see. So our battle was fated, then!
**[15:45] zun**
Go, Aurite!
**[15:47] zun**
The time has come to unleash your power
**[15:48] zun**
and achieve your longstanding desire!
**[15:52] kusa**
Conquest!
**[15:59] kusa**
My name is Dark Aurite.
**[16:02] kusa**
The Black Chevalier, writhing in darkness!
**[16:06] kusa**
Ater Aurum!
**[16:13] gero**
What's that?
**[16:14] ari**
That's where the student council room is.
**[16:16] en**
What's that?
**[16:17] ari**
That's where our club room is.
**[16:26] atsu**
Wait! Let's do this after the culture festival's over!
**[16:28] atsu**
I want to sell the curry I worked so hard to make!
**[16:30] kusa**
Curry, you say?
**[16:32] kusa**
Just leave it to rot!
**[16:35] atsu**
No! That curry's important to me!
**[16:37] kusa**
Why? Why curry, of all things?
**[16:40] atsu**
If we're talking about "of all things,"
**[16:41] atsu**
why do you have to be my
enemy of all things, Kin-chan?
**[16:46] kusa**
Don't call me by that name!
**[16:50] guy**
Wow! Who's putting on that performance?
**[16:52] guy**
Cool! There's lights and everything!
**[16:55] ari**
What's going on?
**[16:57] gero**
It must be serious, to make
the president forget himself.
**[17:00] en**
Why is Atsushi fighting?
**[17:03] both**
President?
**[17:04] both**
Atsushi?
**[17:07] gero**
Why can we see their faces?
**[17:09] ryuu**
The blur isn't on us, right?
**[17:13] taw**
Mumble mumble, and all.
**[17:15] all**
You guys are...
**[17:16] both**
Caerula Adamas?
**[17:19] both**
The Battle Lovers?
**[17:20] all**
Um...
**[17:22] both**
Conquest!
**[17:25] ari**
The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
**[17:28] ari**
Argent!
**[17:33] gero**
The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
**[17:35] gero**
Perlite!
**[17:40] gora**
A bad omen.
**[17:42] gero**
How dare you deceive us all this time?!
**[17:45] ryuu**
That's our line!
**[17:48] ari**
Learning your identities is
a real load off our minds!
**[17:52] en**
It's hard to see something that's
right under your nose, I guess!
**[17:58] io**
What's going to happen to the curry?
**[18:00] io**
What about the profits from Cosplay Hero Curry?
**[18:03] wom**
Mumble mumble, I'd say!
**[18:07] kusa**
Gigant Aurum!
**[18:14] atsu**
Yumo—
**[18:14] yumoto**
Why are you two fighting?!
**[18:18] kusa**
This is not such a trivial thing!
**[18:20] yumoto**
But it *is* a fight, isn't it?
**[18:22] atsu**
He just hates me, that's all.
**[18:25] kusa**
That's right.
**[18:26] kusa**
I hate you, Kinugawa Atsushi.
**[18:29] kusa**
Ever since that day you rejected me!
**[18:33] yumoto**
Rejected? What did you do, Atsushi-senpai?
**[18:36] atsu**
Rejected? Did I do that to you, Kin-chan?
**[18:40] kusa**
If you're playing dumb, it's pathetic.
**[18:42] kusa**
If you really have forgotten,
then I'll consign you to death!
**[18:47] kusa**
At-chan, you're coming by my house, right?
**[18:49] atsu**
I can't today. I've got something to do.
**[18:52] kusa**
Okay...
**[18:58] en**
Whoops.
**[18:59] atsu**
Th-Thanks.
**[19:01] en**
Kinugawa? Where are you going?
**[19:03] atsu**
CoCoKaRa Curry.
**[19:04] en**
That's right. Today's their extra-spicy curry day.
**[19:07] atsu**
Yufuin, you like curry?
**[19:08] en**
Pretty well.
**[19:09] atsu**
Want to go with me?
**[19:12] atsu**
I have a coupon.
***SIGN*** All curry 20% off
**[19:14] en**
So do I.
**[19:15] en**
If I had to choose which I hate more,
mild curry or stinky natto,
**[19:18] en**
I'd choose mild curry any time.
**[19:20] atsu**
That's right. There are people
who find even the mild stuff spicy.
**[19:24] kusa**
Stupid curry.
**[19:29] atsu**
Morning, Kin-chan.
**[19:36] atsu**
Kin-chan?
**[19:40] en**
What, did you have a fight or something?
**[19:42] atsu**
I don't remember having one...
**[19:44] en**
What, you're fighting and
you don't even know why?
**[19:49] en**
Why not ask him?
**[19:50] atsu**
I'd better not.
**[19:51] atsu**
If he doesn't want to talk about it,
I'd feel bad trying to force it out of him.
**[19:56] kusa**
You broke our oath!
**[19:59] atsu**
Oath?
**[20:04] atsu**
What did you wish for?
**[20:06] kusa**
I wished for us to stay friends forever.
**[20:10] atsu**
You don't need to wish on a shooting star for that.
**[20:15] atsu**
'Cause we'll be friends forever, no matter what.
**[20:22] kusa**
You stomped on decorum!
**[20:28] gora**
Yumoto...
**[20:31] gora**
I'm coming now.
**[20:38] kusa**
Don't get in my way!
**[20:39] yumoto**
Please don't have a falling-out in front of me!
**[20:42] yumoto**
I hate that kind of thing!
**[20:44] kusa**
In that case...
**[20:48] kusa**
I'll destroy you both together!
**[20:53] gora**
*Do they intend to do the same thing again?*
**[21:03] io**
Fight!
**[21:05] ryuu**
One shot?
**[21:06] yumoto**
Hey, you're late!
**[21:10] atsu**
En-chan!
**[21:11] en**
Sorry I'm late.
**[21:18] en**
When I hear that story of yours, Kusatsu,
it sounds to me like you're just sulking!
**[21:22] kusa**
Shut up, you coward!
**[21:24] io**
We won't stand silent while you
slander the good name of curry!
**[21:43] gero**
It's presumptuous to think that
the likes of you could oppose us.
**[21:46] ari**
If you withdraw now, we won't harm you.
**[21:51] yumoto**
I am going to stop this stupid fight between you!
**[21:54] hire**
Oh? It's being drawn out that long?
**[21:57] hire**
That's great. Just what I wanted.
**[23:39] [SONG] ---**
Next Time
**[23:43] [SONG] ---**
At Last
**[23:47] [SONG] ---**
The Final Episode!
# 12 - Love Forever
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:10] yumoto**
I'm going to stop this
stupid fight between you!
**[00:12] hire**
Oh? It's being drawn out that long?
**[00:15] hire**
That's great. Just what I wanted.
**[00:25] yumoto**
Student Council President!
Let's talk about this!
**[00:28] kusa**
Don't be absurd!
**[00:30] kusa**
I have power!
**[00:32] kusa**
Power that you lack.
Power to cleanse the world!
**[00:41] gora**
Don't be deceived!
**[00:45] gora**
This has all been prearranged!
**[00:47] gora**
It's a set-up!
**[00:49] yumoto**
Big bro Gora?
**[00:50] atsu**
What was set up?
**[00:52] gora**
All of it! This guy set up all of it!
**[00:55] hire**
Let me go! Let me go, I say!
**[00:57] hire**
Just who do you think I am?
**[01:00] kusa**
A talking goldfish? It couldn't be...
**[01:02] gora**
Now, Hireashi! Confess everything!
**[01:07] hire**
I'll talk! I'll talk!
**[01:08] hire**
I'll tell them everything. Just don't crush me!
**[01:12] gora**
Now, hurry!
**[01:13] hire**
Yes, yes, yes!
**[01:14] hire**
This is a reality show targeted
at the whole universe!
**[01:18] hire**
The things you say, the things you do,
every move you make...
**[01:22] hire**
All of it, down to the tiniest detail,
is being broadcast across the universe!
**[01:26] all**
Broadcast across the universe?!
**[01:28] hire**
They're watching you Earthlings divided
into two groups and fighting each other!
**[01:33] all**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[01:35] en**
I never thought I'd have a moment in
my life when I'd say "What did you say?!"
**[01:40] en**
But this is a real
"What did you say?!" moment.
**[01:42] kusa**
Broadcast... across the universe?
**[01:44] zun**
Chief Hireashi!
**[01:50] yumoto**
Big bro!
**[01:52] zun**
Chief Hireashi! Are you all right?
**[01:53] hire**
Of course I'm not all right!
You took too long getting here!
**[01:56] zun**
I am very sorry!
**[01:58] hire**
Kinosaki-chan! Continue the broadcast!
**[02:01] kino**
Okay! This is Kinosaki on the scene!
**[02:04] kino**
Now let's have a talk with the leader
of the Conquest Club, Kusatsu Kinshiro!
**[02:09] kino**
How are you feeling right now?
**[02:12] kino**
Say a few words to our viewers.
**[02:17] kino**
Okay! That was Dark Aurite,
A.K.A. Kusatsu Kinshiro,
**[02:20] kino**
whose expression suggests
some lingering shock!
**[02:24] kusa**
That means...
**[02:26] kusa**
Everything I've said and done
**[02:28] kusa**
has all been watched?
**[02:30] kino**
Yes, that's right!
**[02:32] kino**
In addition to your battles,
there have been hidden cameras set up
**[02:36] kino**
in your student council room
and personal spaces, as well!
**[02:39] kino**
It's all being broadcast
throughout the whole galaxy!
**[02:43] kusa**
Throughout the whole galaxy?
**[02:45] kino**
Yes! The faint yearning
for your childhood friend,
**[02:48] kino**
the obstinacy, the angry outbursts,
the unavoidable failures of understanding...
**[02:52] kino**
You're a stand-out character!
**[02:54] kino**
You're a conversation topic for thousands
of millions of people across the universe!
**[03:00] kusa**
I-It can't be...
**[03:01] kino**
It's the tsundere in you.
**[03:04] yumoto**
Big bro! Big bro!
**[03:05] yumoto**
Speak to me! Don't die!
**[03:08] zun**
What are you doing, Caerula Adamas?
**[03:10] zun**
Go and defeat the Battle Lovers!
**[03:13] kusa**
What's the point in fighting them now?
**[03:16] zun**
What was that?
**[03:18] kusa**
Now that everything's been brought to light,
**[03:22] kusa**
all my talk of order rings completely hollow.
**[03:25] zun**
To whom do you think I gave
**[03:28] zun**
the power to rule the world?
**[03:32] zun**
Tch.
**[03:34] hire**
If it's come to this, go to plan B!
**[03:36] hire**
Do it, Zun-chan!
**[03:37] zun**
Sir!
**[03:38] zun**
Zundar Needles, activate!
**[03:44] yumoto**
Big bro?
**[03:45] atsu**
This is...
**[03:52] en**
G-Gora-san!
**[04:06] yumoto**
B-Big bro Gora!
**[04:08] gora**
My name is Wood-Chopper Monster.
**[04:11] gora**
I will chop wood, and the world, in two!
**[04:15] all**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[04:16] en**
Okay, that's already the second
"What did you say?" of my life.
**[04:21] ari**
He became a monster?
**[04:23] gero**
So it wasn't our power doing that?
**[04:30] yumoto**
Why... Why is my brother Gora...
**[04:35] gora**
Chop!
**[04:40] yumoto**
Stop it, big bro!
**[04:46] io**
He's so powerful...
**[04:47] ryuu**
That's Yumoto's big brother for you.
**[04:49] atsu**
All that daily wood chopping
wasn't just for show.
**[04:52] en**
And what's with the hatchet?
That's a bit obsessive.
**[04:55] yumoto**
Why are you so good at this, big bro?
**[04:58] hire**
He actually noticed! Well done! Well done!
**[05:00] yumoto**
Huh? What?
**[05:02] hire**
Now it's time for a nostalgic playback of old times!
***SIGN*** TV Universe
**[05:09] hire**
Universal Calendar 12015.
**[05:12] hire**
My employer, TV Universe,
sent me, the skilled Hireashi,
***SIGN*** Reality Show
***SIGN*** Can I Destroy the Earth?
**[05:18] hire**
to be the director of a reality show:
*Can I Destroy the Earth?*
**[05:25] hire**
There was a despicable, wicked Earthling.
**[05:27] hire**
His name was Hakone Gora.
**[05:31] gora**
Chop!
**[05:33] gora**
Chop!
**[05:34] gora**
Chop!
**[05:43] hire**
That man vanquished all the monsters
we sent, one after another.
**[05:48] hire**
He had no consideration for how badly our viewers
**[05:51] hire**
wanted to see the Earth conquered and destroyed,
**[05:53] hire**
and no ability to read the mood.
He made all our plans come to nothing.
**[05:57] atsu**
Are you saying Yumoto's big brother was
the previous generation of Battle Lovers?
**[06:02] yumoto**
Oh, now that you mention it...
**[06:04] yumoto**
My brother would always sharpen
his hatchet after I went to bed...
**[06:08] yumoto**
I saw him go out somewhere
after that, lots of times.
**[06:12] yumoto**
I was too scared to ask
where he was going, though.
**[06:15] io**
That would be pretty scary.
**[06:17] ryuu**
Yeah, on a pants-pissing level.
**[06:20] hire**
Once the program lost its
concept, the ratings dwindled.
**[06:24] hire**
In the end, it was tragically canceled.
**[06:26] hire**
CIDE is the only show I've ever
directed that got canceled!
**[06:30] atsu**
CIDE?
**[06:32] en**
I guess that's short for *Can I Destroy the Earth?*
**[06:34] wom**
It's only natural that it was canceled!
**[06:36] wom**
I could not allow such
foolishness and barbarism!
**[06:40] wom**
You received numerous complaints from
the Space Ethics Improvement Organization,
**[06:43] wom**
but you always make some vague
excuse like "just watch it until the end"!
**[06:47] en**
Wait, you've known about all this from the start?
**[06:51] wom**
I'm just acting in the
spirit of animal preservation!
**[06:54] wom**
I couldn't stand watching the creatures of
Earth wiped out for someone's entertainment!
**[06:59] zun**
We're just giving the masses what they want to see!
**[07:03] wom**
What kind of viral marketing is that?
**[07:05] wom**
Your selfishness is your undoing!
**[07:07] wom**
What about compliance, anyway?
**[07:10] hire**
Compliance? Ha! I'm laughing so hard,
I could brew tea in my navel!
**[07:14] wom**
I don't want to hear
talk of navels from a fish!
**[07:16] zun**
Silence! You have a pouch, and that's just gross!
**[07:19] wom**
Are you going there?
Are you really going to go there?
**[07:22] zun**
And what if I am?
**[07:24] wom**
Then I'll go there, too!
**[07:26] wom**
The way you're always twitching your nose?
**[07:29] wom**
That really bothers me!
**[07:31] zun**
I'm not twitching it!
**[07:33] wom**
You are so!
**[07:35] hire**
You really are.
**[07:36] ---**
What?!
**[07:37] en**
Cut it out, you guys.
**[07:39] en**
I can't tell if it's cute or disgusting.
**[07:42] hire**
Anyway, since CIDE was a failure,
**[07:46] hire**
I was exiled to the company
history compilation office.
**[07:49] hire**
Even Aria-chan, the cabaret girl
from Gotanda Planet, dumped me!
**[07:52] hire**
It put me through the wringer!
**[07:55] ryuu**
You go to cabaret clubs? Also, those exist?
**[08:00] hire**
Oh, really? The numbers are through the roof?
**[08:03] hire**
Okay, go at it! Make it look good!
**[08:06] gora**
Chop!
**[08:12] atsu**
Why did Gora-san...
**[08:14] io**
He was standing there quietly all this time.
**[08:16] ryuu**
Why did he decide to start moving again now?
**[08:18] hire**
That's the kabuki rule!
**[08:20] hire**
When the camera's rolling,
everyone else stops moving.
**[08:23] hire**
Until the speaker's done with
their lines, they must stand quietly.
**[08:26] hire**
More precisely, they're incapable of moving!
**[08:28] gora**
Chop!
**[08:29] gora**
Chop! Chop! Chop!
**[08:33] hire**
Excellent!
**[08:34] hire**
A former hero, fallen to the dark side.
He becomes the ultimate enemy,
**[08:38] hire**
and now stands in the way of his
own flesh-and-blood little brother!
**[08:41] yumoto**
Big bro, if you were really a hero once,
**[08:44] yumoto**
how can you turn into a monster so easily?!
**[08:46] yumoto**
Show some mettle, big bro!
**[08:56] gora**
I refuse.
**[09:03] yumoto**
Stop it, big bro!
**[09:04] gora**
Chop!
**[09:08] yumoto**
Stop it, I said!
**[09:09] kino**
Oh, what a red-hot development!
**[09:11] kino**
Whoever wins, we're guaranteed rave reviews!
**[09:14] ryuu**
I'm not really excited about
attacking Yumoto's brother, but...
**[09:18] io**
This is no time for holding back!
**[09:21] ryuu**
Vesta Ignit!
**[09:23] io**
Sulfur Gaia!
**[09:26] atsu**
Epinard Hurricane!
**[09:27] en**
Cerulean Aqua!
**[09:29] gora**
Chop!
**[09:31] en**
It's no use! We're no match for him!
**[09:33] yumoto**
Big bro! Come to your senses!
**[09:35] gora**
I refuse!
**[09:45] kino**
Look at that power!
**[09:47] kino**
This is the Gora Power that
drove CIDE to cancellation!
**[09:50] ari**
Excuse me.
**[09:51] ari**
It's Kinosaki-kun, isn't it?
**[09:53] kino**
Yes, that's right.
**[09:55] ari**
Are you through interviewing
our student council president?
**[09:58] kino**
Yes, I'm done.
**[10:00] kino**
What's going on here is far more interesting.
**[10:03] kino**
Woah!
**[10:03] ari**
Got it.
**[10:04] ari**
Then I have one more question for you.
**[10:06] kino**
I'm busy right now. Can't it wait until later?
**[10:09] ari**
No, it's a very simple question.
**[10:11] ari**
Answer yes or no.
**[10:13] ari**
Did you know about their plan from the start?
**[10:17] ari**
And that's why you've
been doing your research?
**[10:19] kino**
That's right.
**[10:21] ari**
I see.
**[10:22] kino**
What is it?
**[10:27] ari**
Akoya...
**[10:28] gero**
It's the duty of the youngest member
to handle this kind of work, right?
**[10:41] en**
Yumoto!
**[10:42] gora**
Chop!
**[10:44] gora**
Chop!
**[10:49] gora**
Chop!
**[10:58] atsu**
Kin-chan!
**[11:08] kusa**
What?
**[11:10] atsu**
Are you okay, Kin-chan?
**[11:15] kusa**
Why?
**[11:16] atsu**
Because even though you
might not feel the same way,
**[11:19] atsu**
I still think of you as a friend.
**[11:24] kusa**
At-chan...
**[11:37] kusa**
"Cleanse" can also mean to
make anew, to set things right.
**[11:42] kusa**
In that case, perhaps I need to cleanse myself.
**[11:47] gora**
Chop!
**[11:48] gora**
Chop chop chop chop chop!
**[11:54] gora**
Chop!
**[11:59] gora**
Chop!
**[12:05] yumoto**
Guys!
**[12:06] en**
Now! Use the Love Attack!
**[12:09] all**
Yeah!
**[12:10] yumoto**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[12:12] Default;en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[12:15] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[12:17] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[12:20] ryuu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[12:35] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[12:41] gora**
Chop!
**[12:44] yumoto**
The Love Attack...
**[12:45] gora**
Chop!
**[12:47] yumoto**
You won't chop us!
**[12:52] gora**
Chop!
**[12:54] yumoto**
Big bro, snap out of it!
**[12:57] gora**
Chop!
**[12:58] yumoto**
This isn't my big brother!
**[13:01] gora**
Ch... Chop...
**[13:03] yumoto**
If you become a minion of evil,
who will chop the wood for the bath?
**[13:07] gora**
Bath?
**[13:09] yumoto**
That's right! The Kurotama Bath
is everything to you, isn't it?
**[13:13] gora**
Kurotama Bath...
**[13:15] yumoto**
Remember the warmth of the bath!
**[13:18] gora**
Warmth...?
**[13:37] en**
Yumoto grew...
**[13:38] atsu**
...wings?
**[13:39] ryuu**
He's an angel?
**[13:40] io**
No way.
**[13:42] wom**
That's the More Better Love Making!
**[13:44] all**
More Better Love Making?!
**[13:46] wom**
That's right!
**[13:48] wom**
He's more better in every respect!
**[13:49] wom**
In other words, he's the More Sparkling Prince!
**[13:53] yumoto**
More Better Love Shower!
**[14:02] gora**
What is this sensation?
**[14:04] gora**
It seems to warm me to my core...
**[14:07] gora**
Comfort... Healing...
**[14:09] yumoto**
Big bro, this is a bath.
**[14:12] gora**
I see. This is a bath.
**[14:19] gora**
Baths are great.
**[14:22] yumoto**
Love is over!
**[14:24] hire**
It's not over yet!
**[14:29] en**
Oh, fine! I'll say it as many times as you want!
**[14:32] all**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[14:35] hire**
How dare you, how dare you,
how dare you, how dare you?!
**[14:38] hire**
You've rendered all my plans to nothing!
**[14:42] yumoto**
That's...
**[14:44] yumoto**
a porcupinefish?
**[14:45] wom**
A goldfish and a hedgehog
make a porcupinefish.
**[14:47] wom**
It does make sense, logically...
**[14:49] all**
No it doesn't!
**[14:50] hire**
Go! Finish them!
**[14:53] zun**
Roger that!
**[14:55] zun**
Transform!
**[15:04] hire**
Porcupine...
**[15:06] zun**
fish!
**[15:08] all**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[15:21] yumoto**
I don't think so!
**[15:30] kusa**
Ultima...
**[15:31] trio**
Adamas!
**[15:38] ryuu**
Why would the student council...
I mean, Caerula Adamas help us?
**[15:41] kusa**
As student council president,
I couldn't turn a blind eye
**[15:45] kusa**
to anyone causing harm to our students. That's all.
**[15:48] atsu**
Thanks, Kin-chan.
**[15:51] kusa**
Why?! Why are you like this, At-chan?
**[15:55] kusa**
You being so nice just lets me be selfish!
**[15:59] kusa**
It was the same then!
**[16:00] kusa**
You should have gotten angry and
told me not to take things out on you!
**[16:03] kusa**
But because it was me, you didn't say anything.
**[16:07] kusa**
You didn't do anything!
**[16:08] kusa**
That's why I could never apologize to you!
**[16:12] atsu**
Sorry.
**[16:13] kusa**
I don't want an apology!
**[16:16] atsu**
Sorry.
**[16:20] ryuu**
Kinugawa-senpai, at times like this,
**[16:22] ryuu**
you should just say "I understand"
and take them gently in your arms.
**[16:25] io**
That's just how *you* do things.
**[16:27] atsu**
Does this mean we can walk
home together and talk again?
**[16:33] kusa**
Yeah.
**[16:35] wom**
Oh, this is the true love known as friendship!
**[16:39] wom**
It's a happy end!
**[16:40] hire**
I told you, it hasn't ended yet!
**[16:44] hire**
I almost got stuck following the kabuki rule!
**[16:48] yumoto**
You still want to fight?!
**[16:50] wom**
In that case, everyone turn More Better!
**[16:54] en**
The More Flashing Prince!
**[16:58] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[17:00] atsu**
The More Piercing Prince!
**[17:02] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[17:05] io**
The More Roaring Prince!
**[17:08] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[17:10] ryuu**
The More Thrilling Prince!
**[17:13] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[17:15] kusa**
The Golden Chevalier,
shining in greater radiance!
**[17:19] kusa**
Aurite!
**[17:21] ari**
The Silver Chevalier,
rustling even more young leaves!
**[17:23] ari**
Argent!
**[17:25] gero**
The Pearl Chevalier,
making all the flowers bloom!
**[17:28] gero**
Perlite!
**[17:30] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[17:32] five**
More Battle Lovers!
**[17:35] hire**
"More Better"? Don't make me laugh!
**[17:37] hire**
You're worse than before!
**[17:40] en**
It's true that it's a strange name...
**[17:41] wom**
The name is just ornamental!
**[17:43] wom**
Why can't they understand that?
**[17:45] yumoto**
That's right! What really matters is love!
**[17:48] en**
Freedom!
**[17:49] atsu**
Friendship!
**[17:50] io**
Money!
**[17:51] ryuu**
Girls!
**[17:52] gero**
Beauty, right?
**[17:54] ari**
I'm not sure.
**[17:55] kusa**
For Binan High School to
remain Binan High School!
**[17:59] yumoto**
Let's go!
**[18:01] hire**
Let's turn the tables on them!
**[18:02] zun**
Roger that!
**[18:18] hire**
All of you together isn't enough!
**[18:21] hire**
Yes, yes? S-Station director?
**[18:24] hire**
Huh? What? Of course not.
**[18:26] hire**
The development may be a bit forced,
but we got the proper go-ahead for it.
**[18:30] hire**
What? R-Right now?
You can't cancel us that suddenly!
**[18:34] hire**
Director! Um, D-Director?
**[18:37] hire**
What about that night on Gotanda Planet?!
**[18:42] hire**
Damn it! In that case,
I'll crush you all together!
**[18:46] hire**
Fire! Fire! Keep firing!
**[18:48] zun**
But I'm afraid we've fired all our ammo, sir.
**[18:53] hire**
Ergh!
**[18:55] yumoto**
I'll tell you why you were canceled!
**[18:59] hire**
What?
**[19:00] yumoto**
Because you have no love
for your subject matter!
**[19:03] yumoto**
Those who have no love
cannot move the hearts of others!
**[19:08] yumoto**
More Better Love...
**[19:12] yumoto**
Attack!
**[19:23] yumoto**
Love is... seriously... over!
**[19:30] wom**
*And so,* Can I Destroy the
Earth? Returns *was canceled.*
**[19:35] hire**
I swear to only produce high
quality programming from now on!
**[19:40] zun**
Ditto.
**[19:54] wom**
*The culture festival proceeded without incident,*
**[19:57] wom**
*and their Cosplay Hero Curry sold out.*
***SIGN*** Sold Out
**[20:07] yumoto**
Big bro, I'm getting in first, okay?
**[20:11] gora**
Yes. Today's bath is in good condition.
**[20:14] yumoto**
Yeah!
**[20:16] yumoto**
Yo!
**[20:18] all**
Yo!
**[20:20] en**
Yumoto.
**[20:22] en**
Did you know that nikujaga and stew
are brothers from different mothers?
**[20:27] kusa**
Naturally, stew is superior.
**[20:30] atsu**
We're not talking about superior or inferior.
**[20:32] gero**
But nikujaga's rather homely, isn't it?
**[20:35] io**
No, the broad-mindedness of nikujaga,
**[20:38] io**
that you can make it with beef
or pork, is a thing to be admired.
**[20:41] ari**
Either way,
**[20:42] ari**
it's still sad when you get the wrong
type of potatoes and they melt.
**[20:46] ryuu**
Even if it gets mushy, I forgive them
if they say "sorry" in a cute way.
**[20:52] ---**
Huh?
**[20:53] en**
The point is, when you use
the "mother" known as soy sauce
**[20:55] en**
instead of demi-glace sauce,
you give birth to nikujaga.
**[20:58] yumoto**
Oh!
**[20:59] yumoto**
Nikujaga, huh?
**[21:01] yumoto**
I wish I could have fed some to Wom-san.
**[21:06] atsu**
That's true.
**[21:08] wom**
Excuse me... Don't treat me
like I'm dead just yet.
**[21:12] en**
Oh, sorry.
**[21:14] en**
But at this point in the story, you would
usually have gone back to your home planet.
**[21:17] wom**
I can't go back to space until
Mr. Tawarayama is revived.
**[21:21] atsu**
Huh? What about your scientifically
advanced medical mechanisms?
**[21:24] kusa**
That's likely just an excuse.
**[21:27] ---**
Gulp...
**[21:28] yumoto**
Well, that just means I can cuddle you more!
**[21:30] wom**
W-Wait! No, no, no.
**[21:32] yumoto**
There, there, there.
**[21:32] wom**
Well, I wouldn't say...
**[21:34] yumoto**
Cuddle, cuddle.
**[21:36] wom**
...that!
***SIGN*** Important news after the break
***SIGN*** After this, Mr. Tawarayama was brought back to life thanks to the "life" brought to Earth by one of Wombat's people. Thank goodness.
# Season 2
# 1 - Love, Once More!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] gero**
--
**[00:00] tsu**
--
**[00:00] yu**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:14] en**
Atsushi... you know...
**[00:16] en**
There's something I've been
thinking about lately.
**[00:19] at**
What is it, En-chan?
**[00:20] at**
The Ol*mpics?
**[00:21] at**
The constitution?
**[00:22] at**
Chikuwabu?
**[00:23] en**
No, time.
**[00:25] at**
Time?
**[00:26] en**
We only just got promoted to 3rd years,
**[00:29] en**
and it was autumn before we knew it.
**[00:31] en**
We missed all our chances for summer fun.
**[00:34] en**
You know?
**[00:35] io**
Not true, Yufuin-senpai.
**[00:38] io**
We went to both
**[00:39] io**
Danran Beach and Mt. Binan.
**[00:42] ryu**
Is your memory getting fuzzy already?
That's an aging danger sign!
**[00:46] ats**
En-chan, your kouhai are worried about you.
**[00:49] en**
Yeah,
**[00:50] en**
but it didn't feel like we were going
to the mountains or the beach for fun.
**[00:53] en**
It's too late now,
**[00:55] en**
but it's always been my dream to
make lots of fun summer memories.
**[00:59] io**
You know the saying.
**[01:01] io**
"Time doesn't betray dreams," and vice versa.
**[01:04] en**
Does anyone even know what that means?
**[01:06] at**
In my opinion, it means that
the time you spend working
**[01:09] at**
puts you that much closer to your dreams...
**[01:11] en**
Atsushi. You don't actually
have to analyze it.
**[01:14] ryu**
Hey, you know sand clocks?
**[01:17] at**
That's pretty out of the blue.
**[01:18] ryu**
Well, talking about clocks
in the bath reminded me.
**[01:21] ryu**
Sand clocks.
**[01:22] io**
Saunas have them a lot, don't they?
**[01:24] en**
Io, have you been to a sauna?
**[01:27] io**
A friend of mine has one at home.
**[01:29] io**
A Finnish sauna.
**[01:30] io**
It's basically a steam bath.
**[01:32] en**
They slap their backs with
birch branches, don't they?
**[01:36] io**
What? Do they?
**[01:37] en**
You didn't know?
**[01:38] at**
Anyway, Ryuu, what were
you saying about sand clocks?
**[01:41] ryu**
With a sand clock, you know?
**[01:42] ryu**
It's a clock, but it doesn't
tell you what time it is.
**[01:46] ryu**
It claims to be a time-telling device,
**[01:47] ryu**
but it won't actually tell you the time.
**[01:50] ryu**
So how is it a clock?
**[01:51] io**
But isn't that true of a stopwatch, as well?
**[01:55] ryu**
Oh, right.
**[01:56] ryu**
But somehow that just doesn't sit right.
**[01:59] at**
A sand clock is known as
an "hourglass" in English.
**[02:01] at**
It's not a watch or a clock.
**[02:03] ryu**
Sand and glass? They're the same thing!
**[02:05] en**
I can't believe you guys
**[02:07] en**
kept this stupid conversation up this long.
**[02:10] at**
En-chan, are you really one to talk?
**[02:13] en**
What do you mean?
**[02:17] yu**
You use a sand clock when
you get an enema, right?
**[02:20] both**
Enema?!
**[02:21] yu**
Because after it goes in,
**[02:22] yu**
you need to hold it in for a while.
**[02:25] en**
Really?
**[02:26] en**
I never knew sand clocks
bore such a noble mission.
**[02:29] ryu**
But Yumoto,
**[02:30] ryu**
why do you know something so hardcore?
**[02:33] yu**
Well, when I was little, my big brother would always make me...
**[02:35] io**
We don't need to hear this.
**[02:37] at**
They never change.
**[02:39] at**
That Earth Defense Club!
**[02:41] en**
You know, you're a member of it, too...
**[02:47] gero**
I knew it!
**[02:48] gero**
You're all here, eh?
**[02:50] ari**
Hey there.
**[02:51] yu**
Come on in!
**[02:53] ryu**
What do you mean, you knew it?
**[02:57] gero**
The Earth Defense Club
**[02:59] gero**
can always be found marinating
at Kurotama Bath.
**[03:02] io**
Excellent observation.
**[03:08] ari**
I initially turned up my nose at
the thought of public bathing.
**[03:11] ari**
But it's quite nice when you get used to it.
**[03:14] en**
Right?
**[03:15] en**
You can't stretch out in the bath at home.
**[03:18] yu**
Go on!
**[03:18] yu**
Sink right in down to your shoulders!
**[03:21] yu**
Our hot water comes right from a hot spring!
**[03:24] at**
Hey.
**[03:32] at**
It's been a while.
**[03:34] kusa**
We see each other in school every day.
**[03:36] at**
Oh.
**[03:37] at**
That's right.
**[03:39] at**
I guess it's been hard, huh?
**[03:42] kusa**
What has?
**[03:44] at**
Well... you know...
**[03:46] at**
stuff?
**[03:48] kusa**
"Stuff"?
**[03:49] kusa**
That's incredibly vague.
**[03:51] at**
True...
**[03:54] yu**
That reminds me.
**[03:55] yu**
Aren't you student council
guys gonna study abroad?
**[03:58] ryu**
Hey!
**[03:58] io**
Hush!
**[04:00] kusa**
Yeah.
**[04:01] kusa**
We head out tomorrow.
**[04:02] yu**
Lucky!
**[04:03] yu**
You know, I've never ever been on a plane!
**[04:07] yu**
What does it feel like?
**[04:09] kusa**
You just fly, like normal.
**[04:12] yu**
Come on!
**[04:13] yu**
But what's normal? That's I want to know!
**[04:16] yu**
Is it exciting?
**[04:18] yu**
Is it invigorating?!
**[04:19] kusa**
It's not...
**[04:21] kusa**
especially exciting.
**[04:22] kusa**
Nor is it invigorating, I suppose.
**[04:25] kusa**
I don't really know.
**[04:28] en**
Yumoto! Yumoto!
**[04:29] yu**
What?
**[04:30] en**
Just get over here!
**[04:32] yu**
Okay...
**[04:34] en**
Leave the two of them alone.
**[04:36] yu**
What?
**[04:37] yu**
Here, you mean?
**[04:39] io**
Yes, here!
**[04:40] yu**
Why?
**[04:41] en**
Because!
**[04:43] gero**
Arima-san, have you finished
your preparations?
**[04:45] ari**
More or less.
**[04:47] gero**
It doesn't feel real to me yet.
**[04:51] ari**
Same here.
**[04:53] ari**
But it's even worse for Kinshiro, I believe.
**[04:57] kusa**
You seem rather busy.
**[05:00] at**
No, things are pretty normal here.
**[05:13] kusa**
Tomorrow—
**[05:13] at**
How about—
**[05:14] at**
What?
**[05:15] kusa**
Nothing.
**[05:17] at**
Tomorrow what?
**[05:18] kusa**
Tomorrow...
**[05:20] kusa**
I was wondering if anything was going on.
**[05:23] at**
With me?
**[05:24] at**
Well, you're flying out, right, Kin-chan?
**[05:26] kusa**
No, not that.
**[05:28] kusa**
I mean overall.
**[05:29] at**
Overall?
**[05:31] at**
I don't know.
**[05:35] ryu**
Look at this!
**[05:36] ryu**
It's hell! Sweet and sour pastry hell!
**[05:39] en**
Just say it!
**[05:40] en**
Say "I'll go see you off!"
**[05:41] en**
Say "Come and see me off!"
**[05:42] io**
Hey, back off.
**[05:44] io**
The ice just started melting after so long.
**[05:47] io**
Our job is just to watch and hope for the best.
**[05:49] ari**
Something that's been balled up
for so many years
**[05:51] ari**
won't untangle that easily.
**[05:53] io**
You said it, Arima-san.
**[05:55] yu**
Huh? What do you mean?
**[05:56] yu**
What won't untangle?
**[05:58] all**
Never mind! You just sit!
**[06:03] yu**
But President Kusatsu
**[06:04] yu**
looks a lot like Mr. Tawarayama right now!
**[06:07] ryu**
You mean the blank expression?
That's typical for him.
**[06:09] en**
Yeah...
**[06:11] yu**
No!
**[06:12] yu**
I mean he's floating, with Atsushi-senpai!
**[06:17] en**
Did they pass out from the heat?
**[06:19] gero**
President!
***SIGN*** Love, Once More!
**[06:30] en**
Knowing Atsushi,
**[06:32] en**
he felt awkward pushing to come see him off
**[06:34] en**
when he wasn't invited.
**[06:36] ari**
And Kinshiro probably thought
**[06:37] ari**
asking him to come see him off
**[06:39] ari**
would be a shameless request.
**[06:42] yu**
They could have just said it.
**[06:44] yu**
Why didn't they say it?
**[06:46] io**
Things are complicated
when you're a grown-up.
**[06:51] ari**
Are you awake, Kinshiro?
**[06:55] yu**
Are you okay?
**[06:57] kusa**
I seem to have fainted.
**[06:59] kusa**
I'm sorry for the trouble.
**[07:05] yu**
Atsushi-senpai's not awake yet!
**[07:08] kusa**
Well,
**[07:09] kusa**
I have to get home soon
**[07:11] kusa**
to get ready for tomorrow.
**[07:12] ari**
Here!
**[07:13] kusa**
Thank you.
**[07:15] kusa**
Now, Earth Defense Club.
**[07:17] kusa**
Please try not to cause any
trouble while we're abroad.
**[07:20] yu**
Oh, yeah!
**[07:21] yu**
Could we come to see you off tomorrow?
**[07:26] yu**
I want to see a plane!
**[07:27] yu**
Can we?
**[07:30] gero**
What should we do, President?
**[07:32] kusa**
If you want to come, do so.
**[07:34] kusa**
We have no authority to stop you.
**[07:36] gero**
Well, I guess that's that.
**[07:39] ari**
See you.
**[07:40] yu**
Yes!
**[07:42] en**
Atsushi, you okay?
**[07:44] ryu**
The student council just left.
**[07:46] atsu**
I know.
**[07:49] atsu**
Yumoto...
**[07:51] atsu**
Thanks.
**[07:52] yu**
For what?
**[07:53] atsu**
Well... nothing.
**[07:56] yu**
Atsushi-senpai, are you cold?
**[07:58] en**
Should we go back in?
**[08:00] ryu**
Sure.
**[08:01] ryu**
I don't have any dates to go on today.
**[08:03] io**
And the Tokyo markets are already closed.
**[08:11] en**
Atsushi, you're way too dere.
**[08:13] atsu**
Me?
**[08:14] atsu**
Really?
**[08:17] atsu**
I was thinking, in hindsight,
**[08:19] atsu**
the Battle Lovers wasn't bad at all.
**[08:23] en**
You think?
**[08:24] en**
These things are the root of all evil.
**[08:26] atsu**
I know, that's why I said "in hindsight."
**[08:29] atsu**
All's well that ends well, you know?
**[08:31] ryu**
Kinugawa-senpai, you're really generous.
**[08:34] io**
Very far-sighted thinking.
**[08:36] yu**
I had fun with our Battle
Lover club activity, too!
**[08:39] four**
Don't call it a club activity!
**[08:41] yu**
We just need Wom-san
and Mr. Tawarayama to show up,
**[08:44] yu**
and we'll have the whole gang!
**[08:46] en**
Speak of the devil.
**[08:48] both**
Wom-san?
**[08:51] mon**
I am...
**[08:51] yu**
An hourglass!
**[08:52] mon**
Don't call me by such a cheap name!
**[08:54] mon**
I am...
**[08:55] yu**
Hourglass Monster!
**[08:56] mon**
Silence!
**[08:57] mon**
I mean, stop time!
**[09:00] mon**
I am wonderful!
**[09:04] mon**
Evolution, change,
and growth are unnecessary!
**[09:07] mon**
I live now only for this moment!
**[09:10] mon**
Live! For! The present!
**[09:11] mon**
Life Now!
**[09:14] mon**
Did you behold my power?
**[09:16] mon**
Time Stopper!
**[09:19] yu**
Wow, he startled me!
**[09:21] yu**
He startled me so much I forgot to breathe!
**[09:23] ryu**
He's sounding kind of cool, though...
**[09:25] io**
You think that's cool? Really?
**[09:28] io**
I mean, I know "Show Stopper"...
**[09:30] en**
But why a monster?
**[09:32] en**
I thought we beat Zundar and Hireashi.
**[09:34] atsu**
He should have been demoted to assistant director.
**[09:37] yu**
You intend to stand against us, do you?
**[09:39] yu**
Senpais!
**[09:40] yu**
Let's Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
**[09:43] yu**
Love Making!
**[09:45] mon**
I don't think so!
**[09:54] yu**
The Lovracelets... disappeared?
**[09:57] [Messenger] sign**
Messenger of Love From Space
Wombat
Special Abilities:
Highly Advanced Scientific Technology
**[10:08] ryu**
Wow, you can really see the tan line!
**[10:10] atsu**
Focus on the real issue!
**[10:12] mon**
Attention, Battle Lovers!
**[10:15] mon**
Your time ends now.
**[10:17] mon**
For, you see...
**[10:18] mon**
I will end you all!
**[10:21] en**
Wait!
**[10:23] en**
How did you know we're the Battle Lovers?
**[10:29] mon**
That's not all I know!
**[10:31] mon**
Your faces and voices are blur-free
**[10:34] mon**
and exposed!
**[10:36] en**
No way!
**[10:37] mon**
Yes way!
**[10:41] atsu**
En-chan!
**[10:42] at**
I don't know who you're working for,
**[10:45] at**
but this is a violation of privacy laws!
**[10:49] mon**
You won't need privacy when you're dead!
**[10:51] ryu**
Why, you...
**[10:53] io**
We won't let you...
**[10:55] ryu**
I can't move!
**[10:56] at**
En-chan!
**[10:57] yu**
Darn it.
**[10:58] yu**
This weirdo wouldn't be able
**[11:00] yu**
to push us around if we could Love Making!
**[11:03] mon**
Sorry, but that's not in your futures!
**[11:05] mon**
Sleep in the hour of repose known as death!
**[11:14] goro**
Is someone horsing around in the bath?!
**[11:18] goro**
Who are you?!
**[11:19] yu**
Big bro!
**[11:21] goro**
And he's kicking sand around, too!
**[11:23] goro**
What the hell made you think that was okay?!
**[11:26] mon**
Well...
**[11:29] mon**
Oh, there's a very important galaxy-spanning reason...
**[11:32] goro**
Someone who can't wash off
**[11:34] goro**
before getting in the bath,
talking about the galaxy?!
**[11:36] goro**
What kind of crap is that?!
**[11:39] mon**
I'm sorry!
**[11:40] mon**
I'll come back later!
**[11:42] goro**
Hold on!
**[11:43] goro**
Clean this up first!
**[11:45] goro**
Yumoto.
**[11:46] yu**
Yes?
**[11:47] goro**
Choose better friends.
**[11:50] ryu**
What?
**[11:51] ryu**
Don't tell the student council?
**[11:53] io**
Why not?
**[11:54] en**
They're about to go study abroad.
**[11:57] en**
I don't want to worry them.
**[11:59] ryu**
But what if Zundar's
pulling the strings again?
**[12:03] atsu**
No way.
**[12:04] atsu**
Kin-chan wouldn't do anything so cowardly.
**[12:07] ryu**
Sorry.
**[12:10] en**
You have nothing to apologize for, Ryuu.
**[12:12] en**
But if they're not behind it,
**[12:15] en**
we have to figure out what
the hell happened yesterday.
**[12:19] atsu**
En-chan, what's wrong?
***SIGN*** Monthly
Shounen GUNP
**[12:23] ryu**
Hey! That's my GUNP!
**[12:27] mon**
You snuck up on me! You cowards!
**[12:28] en**
No, you just weren't paying attention.
**[12:31] ryu**
Give it back!
**[12:37] io**
Ryuu!
**[12:39] atsu**
Time Stopping Monster-san!
**[12:40] atsu**
We'd like a word with you.
**[12:42] mon**
Oh? I'll hear you out.
**[12:44] en**
What, he's okay being called *that*?
**[12:46] atsu**
We need to go and see off
some friends at the airport.
**[12:50] atsu**
You can read that if you want,
**[12:51] atsu**
so can we meet you back here?
**[12:53] ryu**
Huh? That's my GUNP!
**[12:54] mon**
I see!
**[12:55] mon**
Stop the time on the fight, then?
**[12:58] atsu**
That's right!
**[12:58] atsu**
Exactly!
**[12:59] mon**
It won't be that easy!
**[13:02] ryu**
Hey! My GUNP!
**[13:04] io**
That's property damage!
**[13:05] ryu**
Now you'll pay!
**[13:06] io**
Although we always intended to make you pay!
**[13:10] yu**
Hey, quit getting sand
all over the club room!
**[13:14] en**
Wait!
**[13:15] mon**
Without your Love Power,
**[13:17] mon**
you are no match for me!
**[13:23] hi**
Look at that.
**[13:25] hi**
They're as pathetic as turtles
turned over onto their backs.
**[13:27] tsu**
Stop it.
**[13:29] tsu**
That's an insult...
**[13:30] tsu**
to the turtles.
**[13:31] hi**
That's right. They're less than turtles.
**[13:34] tsu**
Yes,
**[13:35] tsu**
they're pathetic water fleas.
**[13:37] dada**
They'll be pulverized, at this rate.
**[13:45] mon**
Now... It's time to end this!
**[13:50] wom**
Hey! Hold on a minute!
**[13:54] yu**
That voice!
**[14:01] wom**
I'm here!
**[14:04] yu**
Wom-san!
**[14:05] wom**
My name is Wombat.
**[14:08] wom**
The messenger of love,
**[14:09] wom**
who loves the Earth and protects it!
**[14:11] mon**
Wh-What?!
**[14:13] atsu**
What?
**[14:14] atsu**
You used to say you weren't a wombat.
**[14:17] wom**
Now that I am here, there's no need to fear!
**[14:21] wom**
You who are without love...
**[14:23] wom**
At last, love is... love will...
**[14:29] yu**
Wom-san, you're so wriggly!
**[14:31] wom**
Anyway, put these on already!
**[14:39] wom**
I thought something like this might happen,
**[14:41] wom**
so here are your new True Lovracelets!
**[14:44] ryu**
He thought something
like this might happen?
**[14:47] io**
We have to transform again?
**[14:49] wom**
*Of course!*
**[14:51] wom**
Let's go, everyone!
**[14:54] yu**
Love Making!
**[15:21] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[15:24] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[15:26] en**
Love Making.
**[15:37] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[15:39] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[15:42] atsu**
Love Making.
**[15:51] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[15:53] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[15:56] io**
Love Making.
**[16:06] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[16:08] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[16:11] ryu**
Love Making!
**[16:21] ryu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[16:23] ryu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[16:25] en**
This love-filled planet
**[16:27] en**
will not abide those who lack love!
**[16:29] ryu**
Those who wield loveless power
**[16:31] ryu**
must kneel before love!
**[16:33] io**
Love is power!
**[16:34] io**
Love is hope!
**[16:36] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[16:38] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[16:40] yu**
Love!
**[16:40] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[16:44] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[16:45] yu**
Feel the power...
**[16:47] five**
of love!
**[16:50] io**
What? Did our costumes change?
**[16:53] ryu**
Yeah, they're different from before!
**[16:56] wom**
In season 2,
your items and designs always change.
**[16:59] wom**
That is the law of the universe!
**[17:01] wom**
The providence of nature!
**[17:04] wom**
And it's not just how they look!
**[17:06] wom**
You've also powered up,
**[17:08] wom**
and you boast a far more vivid design,
**[17:11] wom**
invoking a taste of the
"now" and the "young"!
**[17:16] en**
I've given up looking
for taste from this guy.
**[17:20] atsu**
Let's just beat this thing
and get to the airport.
**[17:23] en**
Yeah.
**[17:24] en**
Cerulean Love Aqua!
**[17:29] mon**
Curse you!
**[17:30] yu**
En-chan-senpai! I'll do it too!
**[17:32] yu**
Scarlet Love Lumiere!
**[17:37] ryu**
Yeah! Go! Do it!
**[17:39] ryu**
Vesta Love Ignit!
**[17:42] io**
I beg your pardon!
**[17:43] io**
Sulfur Love Gaia!
**[17:48] atsu**
You guys don't hold back, huh?
**[17:51] yu**
Atsushi-senpai, aren't you going to join in?
**[17:54] atsu**
Oh, I am.
**[17:55] atsu**
Epinard Love Hurricane!
**[18:02] ryu**
Wow.
**[18:04] ryu**
Harsh.
**[18:05] io**
Never get on Kinugawa-senpai's bad side, huh?
**[18:15] mon**
You think those trivial attacks
will be enough to beat me?!
**[18:18] ryu**
Well, you do seem to be crying.
**[18:20] mon**
I haven't actually gotten serious yet!
**[18:23] mon**
The real battle is just getting started.
**[18:25] io**
He's surprisingly tenacious.
**[18:27] en**
Stubborn's more like it.
**[18:28] mon**
Orifice Tornado!
**[18:33] ann**
*JNA flight 62 will begin boarding shortly.*
**[18:37] ann**
*Boarding passengers please come to gate 21.*
**[18:38] gero**
I guess they're not coming.
**[18:41] gero**
Well, it's the Earth Defense Club.
**[18:43] gero**
I guess we shouldn't have
trusted them to start with.
**[18:46] kin**
They'll come.
**[18:47] kin**
At-chan will keep his promise.
**[18:50] ari**
Maybe he got put on day shift,
or an errand came up?
**[18:53] ari**
Or something...
**[18:56] ann**
*JNA will begin boarding shortly.*
**[18:59] ann**
*Boarding passengers please come to gate 21.*
**[19:05] kusa**
Let's go.
**[19:06] kusa**
We can't be late to board.
**[19:12] atsu**
No...
**[19:13] atsu**
I must be there to see them off!
**[19:23] mon**
If I defeat you...
**[19:25] mon**
no one will be able to
move time forward for me!
**[19:28] mon**
I will be eternal!
**[19:31] yu**
Who wants eternity like that?!
**[19:33] mon**
What?!
**[19:34] yu**
Fearing change is like moving backwards!
**[19:38] yu**
Moving forward is
**[19:39] yu**
what lets a person get stronger
and achieve their dreams!
**[19:43] yu**
So now that we're stronger,
you can't beat us!
**[19:47] mon**
Wh-Wh-Wh-What?!
**[19:50] yu**
Now!
**[19:53] yu**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[19:58] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[20:01] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[20:05] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[20:08] ryu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[20:22] yu**
True Love Attack!
**[20:36] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[20:52] yu**
Love is over!
**[20:54] all**
We told you, it's not!
**[20:57] yu**
I know this guy.
***SIGN*** Tokiwa Tomaru
**[20:59] yu**
It's Tokiwa Tomaru from the next class over.
**[21:01] atsu**
He was born on April 2nd,
**[21:03] atsu**
and really hates being the first
one in the class to get a year older.
**[21:07] en**
Even so, you can't stop time.
**[21:10] yu**
Besides...
***SIGN*** Bath Coupon
Kurotama Bath
**[21:11] yu**
Time doesn't betray dreams.
**[21:14] io**
Actually, I think we're
**[21:15] io**
on the verge of betraying a dream right now...
**[21:19] io**
The president's.
**[21:20] atsu**
Their flight's about to take off!
**[21:39] kusa**
At-chan!
**[21:48] yu**
He noticed!
**[21:49] yu**
He's waving!
**[21:50] wom**
Don't shake me!
**[21:54] en**
He won't be gone forever.
**[21:56] en**
He'll be back before you know it.
**[22:01] atsu**
Yeah.
**[22:03] yu**
Oh, yeah.
**[22:03] yu**
By the way, where's Mr. Tawarayama?
**[22:06] wom**
Erk!
**[22:07] wom**
A-Actually...
**[22:19] ni**
Hey,
**[22:20] ni**
do you know where the staff office is?
**[22:22] tsu**
We're joining Binan High School
**[22:26] tsu**
as exchange students.
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love is a Mayfly
**[24:01] yu**
Next time: "Love is a Mayfly!"
**[24:03] yu**
Love Making!
**[24:05] ---**
# 2 - Love is a Mayfly
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] aki**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] both**
--
**[00:00] guard**
--
**[00:17] haru**
Aki, silent guardian with eyes of ice,
**[00:20] haru**
a question for you.
**[00:21] haru**
What is an idol?
**[00:23] aki**
One with overwhelming power,
who cannot be replaced.
**[00:27] aki**
Haru, blazing deceiver wreathed in light,
**[00:31] aki**
a question for you.
**[00:33] aki**
What is an idol?
**[00:34] haru**
One who guides and commands the world.
**[00:39] haru**
The object of worship for all things
in creation. That is what we will be.
**[00:44] aki**
No... what we must be.
**[00:47] both**
This is the vow we have made to the universe!
**[00:55] aki**
And if anyone...
**[00:57] haru**
...opposes us...
**[00:59] both**
We'll destroy them.
***SIGN*** Love is a Mayfly
**[02:41] ai**
What is the greatest sin that man can commit?
**[02:46] ai**
Is it sloth?
**[02:48] ai**
Envy?
**[02:50] ai**
Wrath?
**[02:51] ai**
No.
**[02:52] ai**
There is a sin that causes
even more suffering.
**[02:55] ai**
That sin is...
**[02:59] ai**
Beauty!
***SIGN*** Ouso Tsukuro
**[03:05] ai**
Everyone runs in fear of my beauty!
**[03:08] ai**
Truly, beauty is the greatest sin!
**[03:11] stu**
That guy's such a creep.
**[03:12] stu**
He says he has twenty TVs...
**[03:14] stu**
And that he's best friends
with celebrities and stuff.
**[03:16] stu**
Not even little kids try to pull
those kinds of lies nowadays.
**[03:19] stu**
This one time, I lost it and said "Oh,
yeah? Then let's see your ten pet lions!"
**[03:24] stu**
and started walking to his house.
**[03:26] stu**
What happened?
**[03:27] stu**
On the way there, he
started writhing in pain.
**[03:30] stu**
How come?
**[03:31] stu**
He said a long time ago, an alien placed
a curse on his right hand and his heart,
**[03:34] stu**
and it had just started acting up.
**[03:37] stu**
Oh, please. What a geek.
**[03:38] stu**
I couldn't believe it. I started
feeling kind of sorry for him.
**[03:41] ai**
They're not lies!
**[03:42] stu**
So I just went home.
**[03:43] ai**
They're not lies!
**[03:46] ai**
Why won't anyone believe me?!
**[03:50] stu**
What the hell?
**[03:51] ai**
In my mind, I can see the 4K TVs,
**[03:54] ai**
the lions, and the aliens clear as day!
**[04:03] ai**
Is it that they're too beguiled by my beauty?
**[04:07] ai**
I confuse them so badly,
**[04:09] ai**
they refuse to believe the things I say?
**[04:11] ai**
Is it this sorrow that makes me beautiful?
**[04:16] ai**
That's it!
**[04:17] ai**
Beauty is sorrow.
**[04:20] haru**
*Fool.*
**[04:21] haru**
*Beauty is strength.*
**[04:24] aki**
*Wrong.*
**[04:25] aki**
*Beauty is wit.*
**[04:27] ai**
Who's there?
**[04:28] ai**
Aliens?
**[04:29] ai**
My real mommy?
**[04:31] ai**
Or some charming,
**[04:33] ai**
sexy devil come to kidnap me?
**[04:35] haru**
Wrong and wrong, stupid.
**[04:37] aki**
Although "devil" was closest, I suppose.
**[04:43] haru**
You see, we want...
**[04:46] both**
To corrupt you.
**[04:47] aki**
That's why we're here.
***SIGN*** 1584th Pretty Boy Contest
**[04:55] stu**
Already time for the pretty
boy contest again, huh?
**[04:57] stu**
I wonder who'll win this time.
**[05:00] ai**
You're so ignorant.
**[05:02] ai**
To stand atop something so small
**[05:05] ai**
is a miniscule concern.
**[05:08] ai**
I've met the people who stand
**[05:11] ai**
at the very top of the world!
**[05:14] ai**
One like the sun who makes my blood run hot,
**[05:18] ai**
and one like the moon who
chills my soul to the core!
**[05:22] stu**
Look, we've had enough.
**[05:24] stu**
We're not falling for your lies again.
**[05:26] ai**
It's not a lie!
**[05:27] ai**
I really met them!
**[05:32] haru**
Hey, watch where you're running.
**[05:35] aki**
Can you stand?
**[05:37] ai**
You're...
**[05:39] haru**
Here through the exchange
program. Beppu Haruhiko.
**[05:42] aki**
And I am Akihiko.
**[05:44] aki**
We're supposed to be joining
the 2nd year class.
**[05:50] haru**
Are our faces that weird to you?
**[05:52] aki**
Haru.
**[05:53] aki**
You mustn't be so confrontational.
**[05:55] aki**
I'm sure they've rarely seen our like before.
**[05:57] aki**
They've never seen exchange students, either.
**[06:00] haru**
Oh, I see.
**[06:02] haru**
Anyway, pleased to meet you.
**[06:04] ai**
No, it is *we* who are pleased!
**[06:06] ai**
Haruhiko-san! Akihiko-san!
**[06:08] ai**
See? You get it now?
**[06:11] ai**
I don't lie—
**[06:13] kiro**
Beg your pardon! Press Society here!
**[06:15] kino**
Arriving like a bolt out of the blue,
**[06:17] kino**
Beppu Haruhiko-san and Akihiko-san.
**[06:19] kino**
What are your hobbies?
**[06:21] haru**
Bonsai, gardening, and
horseback riding, I suppose.
**[06:24] haru**
Although I don't think I'll
be able to do that here.
**[06:27] aki**
I enjoy calligraphy.
**[06:29] aki**
And I love to play Hungarian
Pastoral Fantasy on the flute.
**[06:33] kino**
Yes, yes, yes!
**[06:34] kino**
How celebrity and executive of you!
**[06:37] kino**
So, any intention to participate
in the Pretty Boy Contest?
**[06:40] haru**
What's that?
**[06:41] aki**
We only just moved here,
**[06:43] aki**
so we're still getting our bearings.
**[06:47] ai**
All questions must go through me!
**[06:50] kino**
And who are you, exactly?
**[06:52] ai**
I'm their number one worshipper and caretaker!
**[06:56] sm**
Isn't that nice?
**[06:57] bu**
Interesting!
**[07:00] bu**
I can feel my biceps humming.
**[07:03] sm**
I invite you to a duel of neurons!
**[07:05] en**
I've been thinking...
**[07:08] atsu**
What?
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[07:08] io**
About what?
**[07:10] en**
What are the conditions for
being a main character?
**[07:13] atsu**
You've lost me.
**[07:15] en**
In the TV show known as life,
**[07:18] en**
there's a clear difference between main
characters and a side character, right?
**[07:21] atsu**
True.
**[07:23] en**
So what separates a main
character and a side character?
**[07:25] atsu**
Good question.
**[07:28] en**
The kinds of people
**[07:29] en**
who don't appear until 8 minutes
and 30 seconds into the episode
**[07:32] en**
can't be the main characters, right?
**[07:33] en**
No, they can't.
**[07:34] atsu**
I think it's okay, as long as they
get a lot to do in the second half.
**[07:38] en**
Oh, really?
**[07:39] atsu**
Of course, I'm a side-character type,
**[07:41] atsu**
so I don't know a lot about main characters.
**[07:44] io**
Oh, no.
**[07:45] io**
You're definitely a leading
man, Kinugawa-senpai.
**[07:47] io**
Like tofu in broth.
**[07:49] atsu**
Does that count as a leading man?
**[07:52] ryu**
I love tofu!
**[07:54] ryu**
You can kill a man with it!
**[07:56] en**
It's a deadly weapon?
**[07:57] en**
But I suppose Atsushi can be frightening
in the right circumstances.
**[08:00] tsu**
What are you talking about?
**[08:02] tsu**
I'm hesitant in everything,
**[08:04] tsu**
even when fighting as the Battle Lovers.
**[08:06] en**
The fact that you can say that without batting
an eye just makes you more frightening.
**[08:09] io**
Actually, yeah.
**[08:10] ryu**
Good point.
**[08:12] wom**
Please, please, please, please stop!
**[08:13] yu**
Speaking of which,
**[08:14] yu**
there's something I've been
thinking about for a while.
**[08:16] yu**
Could that monster we fought
be a leftover from last time?
**[08:19] en**
No way.
**[08:22] en**
There's no way you've been thinking
about that for a while, Yumoto.
**[08:25] io**
That's the part you're denying?
**[08:26] ryu**
He probably just thought of it.
**[08:28] atsu**
Now, now.
**[08:29] atsu**
Let's hear him out.
**[08:31] atsu**
So?
**[08:32] yu**
The student council didn't send him out,
**[08:35] yu**
and Wom-san probably didn't, either.
**[08:36] yu**
So what could it be?
**[08:38] wom**
W-Wait a moment!
**[08:39] wom**
What's all this "Wom-san *probably* didn't" stuff?!
**[08:43] yu**
Don't you worry!
**[08:45] yu**
No matter what happens,
**[08:46] yu**
I believe you, Wom-san!
**[08:49] wom**
You do not!
**[08:50] wom**
You clearly do not!
**[08:50] en**
Well, we saw what you did to Mr. Tawarayama.
**[08:55] wom**
The life I brought slipped out!
**[08:57] wom**
It was an accident! An accident, I swear!
**[09:00] kino**
What an incredible development!
**[09:02] kino**
Are we about to see a
no-holds-barred bloodbath?!
**[09:06] bu**
Boxing can hurt,
**[09:07] bu**
so we'll compete with feats of strength!
***SIGN*** Grip Strength
***SIGN*** Sidesteps
***SIGN*** Pull-Ups
**[09:21] haru**
I have to give you credit.
**[09:23] haru**
You did have the guts to challenge me.
**[09:25] ai**
Haruhiko-sama!
**[09:27] kino**
Next, battle of brains!
**[09:30] shir**
Could they be taking on
the Millenium Problems?!
**[09:33] chi**
There wouldn't be anyone capable of judging it.
***SIGN*** 10 x 10 equation
**[09:36] chi**
We'll do a 10 x 10 equation!
**[09:39] aki**
I'm done.
**[09:40] chi**
Wh-What?!
**[09:41] aki**
Your time would be better spent studying
**[09:43] aki**
than challenging me, don't you think?
**[09:46] both**
Akihiko-sama!
**[09:51] en**
The main/side character stuff reminded me.
**[09:53] atsu**
What?
**[09:54] en**
Isn't it almost time for
the Pretty Boy Contest?
**[09:57] ryu**
Oh yeah, that's right.
**[09:59] io**
What? But you were so fired
up about it before...
**[10:02] ryu**
Yeah, but I've kind of stopped caring.
**[10:05] atsu**
I feel your thermal conductivity, Ryuu.
**[10:08] ryuu**
Huh?
**[10:09] ryuu**
Hey, what's that supposed to mean?
**[10:12] yu**
Speaking of which. In front of my house...
**[10:14] en**
Yumoto's defaulting to "speaking
of which" a lot today.
**[10:17] atsu**
In the real world,
who actually says, "speaking of which"?
**[10:22] en**
Same with "The aforementioned"
**[10:23] en**
and "It just occurred to me"
**[10:24] en**
or "Such-and-such"...
**[10:28] yu**
Just forget that and listen to me!
**[10:31] en**
Fine, fine.
**[10:32] atsu**
So, what is it?
**[10:34] kino**
Shogi competition!
**[10:36] haru**
Check mate.
**[10:38] haru**
Bow before me for eternity.
**[10:41] four**
Yes, forever!
**[10:43] four**
Squee!
**[10:44] kino**
Cooking competition!
**[10:45] haru**
7.32 meters.
**[10:48] aki**
My flavors might be poisonous for you.
**[10:51] aki**
Since you'll never get it out of your mind.
**[10:53] all**
Squee!
**[10:55] kino**
Sewing competition!
**[10:57] haru**
Take good care of this for me.
**[11:00] haru**
And I'll take good care of you.
**[11:02] all**
Squee!
**[11:03] kino**
Fencing competition!
**[11:07] aki**
I've run your heart through.
**[11:09] all**
Squee!
**[11:11] ai**
More! Treat me with more contempt!
**[11:13] ai**
Look down your nose at me!
**[11:17] ai**
The eternal pretty boys of Binan High School,
**[11:19] ai**
Haruhiko-sama, Akihiko-sama.
**[11:21] ai**
We swear our eternal worship
and submission to you!
**[11:23] all**
We do!
**[11:24] haru**
What a burden.
**[11:26] aki**
Don't be like that, Haru.
**[11:29] ai**
Oh, no! Haru-sama, Aki-sama!
**[11:31] ai**
We don't intend to force ourselves on you!
**[11:34] ai**
We just really needed to...
**[11:39] ai**
I-I'm sorry!
**[11:40] ai**
We thought about our needs,
but not about your feelings!
**[11:44] haru**
I feel like the king of the monkey pen.
**[11:47] aki**
Truly, they are apes.
***SIGN*** The Sparkling Prince Battle Lover Scarlet Finishing Move: Scarlet Love Lumiere True Love Attack
**[11:55] yu**
See?
**[11:56] yu**
It's there, like I said!
**[11:58] atsu**
When did they put up a building like this?
**[12:00] ryu**
It looks like a castle.
**[12:02] en**
Looks like a love hotel.
**[12:04] io**
Nah, love hotels are cheaper than that.
**[12:06] io**
This thing's at least two million yen per square meter.
**[12:09] en**
How do you know that?
**[12:11] en**
Instinct?
**[12:12] io**
I do have my real estate
broker license, you know.
**[12:15] yu**
Do you think it's a house?
**[12:18] atsu**
If it's not a love hotel, it must be.
**[12:21] en**
I could have done without hearing
Atsushi say "love hotel."
**[12:25] ryu**
Same here.
**[12:26] io**
I agree.
**[12:27] atsu**
Why?!
**[12:28] yu**
What's a love hotel?
**[12:33] en**
What is this feeling? Motherly instinct?
**[12:35] atsu**
The smell of innocence.
**[12:37] atsu**
It's so soothing!
**[12:38] io**
Never change, Yumoto.
**[12:40] ryu**
Yes, remain ignorant!
**[12:42] yu**
Hey! What was that?!
**[12:42] wom**
A true heir to the throne of love!
**[12:46] yu**
Darn it!
**[12:50] yu**
Oh, are you customers?
**[12:52] yu**
Come on in! The bath's open right now!
**[12:55] haru**
Did you hear that? "Customers," he says.
**[12:57] aki**
Let it go, Haru. That's the class
of person we're dealing with.
**[13:01] aki**
We've moved into the house across the way.
**[13:04] yu**
Oh, really?
**[13:06] yu**
We were saying, it looks like
a love hotel! Just amazi—
**[13:11] en**
We apologize on his behalf.
**[13:13] atsu**
He just meant that it was very impressive.
**[13:16] haru**
We won't forget your face, Hakone Yumoto.
**[13:19] aki**
I'm sure we'll be speaking again, very soon.
**[13:22] aki**
We hope you'll be accommodating.
**[13:23] yu**
Yeah, sure thing!
**[13:25] yu**
Oh, that's right!
***SIGN*** Bath Coupon
Kurotama Bath
**[13:27] yu**
Here, these are coupons for our bath!
**[13:30] yu**
Please use them!
**[13:33] haru**
I'm *horribly* grateful.
**[13:35] aki**
We'll treasure them.
**[13:45] ai**
Hey... Haruhiko-sama? Akihiko-sama?
**[13:49] ai**
I'm very grateful to you for inviting me...
**[13:51] ai**
But being the only one here...
**[13:53] ai**
I'm just delighted... awe-struck, really...
**[13:58] dada**
*Ladies... of which there are none.*
**[14:01] dada**
*Gentlemen!*
**[14:02] dada**
*Welcome to the VEPP Theater.*
**[14:05] ai**
Huh? Did he say Beppu Theater?
**[14:07] dada**
*I'm proud to introduce that marvelous duo...*
**[14:11] dada**
*The VEPPer!*
**[14:14] ai**
English? Vapor?
**[14:16] dada**
*Now's the time!*
**[14:17] dada**
*Enjoy the show!*
**[14:24] both**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[14:30] both**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[14:34] both**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[14:44] both**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[14:50] both**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[14:52] both**
The twin stars shining in the heaven!
**[14:54] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[14:56] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[14:59] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[15:03] both**
Chosen warrior!
**[15:05] haru**
Lucky you!
**[15:07] aki**
Happy you!
**[15:09] both**
Shooting...
**[15:10] both**
Star!
**[15:19] go**
We have new neighbors across
from the bath, then?
**[15:23] yu**
I wonder if they'll use our coupons!
**[15:25] go**
I'm sure they will.
**[15:27] yu**
Yeah!
**[15:32] yu**
By the way, big bro...
**[15:34] yu**
What's a love hotel?
**[15:39] yu**
You don't know, either?
**[15:41] go**
I'm sorry.
**[15:42] yu**
Why are you apologizing?
**[16:02] tofu**
My name is Tofu Monster!
**[16:04] tofu**
I possess the delicate mind
**[16:07] tofu**
and silky white beauty of tofu!
**[16:13] wom**
It's time to Love Making
into the Battle Lovers!
**[16:16] en**
We left our curry back there...
**[16:18] atsu**
What a waste.
**[16:20] ryu**
I had to cut off a great texting session!
**[16:22] io**
I was just thinking about the London markets.
**[16:24] wom**
Get to the Love Making already!
**[16:27] yu**
Let's finish it up quick!
**[16:30] yu**
Love Making!
**[16:35] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[16:38] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[16:41] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[16:42] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[16:45] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[16:47] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[16:50] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[16:52] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[16:55] ryu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[16:57] ryu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[16:59] en**
This love-filled planet will
not abide those who lack love!
**[17:03] ryu**
Those who wield loveless
power must kneel before love!
**[17:07] io**
Love is power!
**[17:08] io**
Love is hope!
**[17:10] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[17:12] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[17:14] yu**
Love!
**[17:15] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[17:18] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[17:19] yu**
Feel the power...
**[17:21] five**
Of love!
**[17:24] yu**
I don't care if you're tofu or atsu-age!
**[17:27] yu**
I want to know why you're
here, and who sent you!
**[17:32] tofu**
If you want to know, you'll
have to beat me first!
**[17:35] tofu**
Domestically-Grown GMO-Free Soybean Shot!
**[17:45] tofu**
Tofu is made from soybeans, you know!
**[17:47] en**
Obviously!
**[17:48] en**
But don't you think you're better than just soybeans?
**[17:50] tofu**
Tofu doesn't judge!
**[17:52] tofu**
Soy Curd Storm!
**[17:58] ryu**
I can't stand curd! It's so gross and mushy!
**[18:02] tofu**
Be consumed by the dilemma
**[18:03] tofu**
of having to eat fragile
food with chopsticks!
**[18:06] ryu**
It's sticking in my throat!
**[18:09] atsu**
I don't think I like this monster.
**[18:11] en**
Is there any monster you *do* like?!
**[18:17] en**
The curds...
**[18:18] yu**
They're so slick...
**[18:20] ryu**
This guy's stronger than I thought!
**[18:22] io**
What should we do?
**[18:37] yu**
Stop wasting food!
**[18:40] yu**
Scarlet Love Lumiere!
**[18:42] mon**
Chilled tofu?!
**[18:48] io**
At least soybean isoflavone
is a great moisturizer...
**[18:52] mon**
Y-You can't beat me!
**[18:54] mon**
I'm delicate and beautiful!
**[18:57] yu**
Don't avert your eyes from the truth!
**[18:59] yu**
Even if you are tofu, right now,
**[19:01] yu**
you're the tofu dregs left behind in the pot!
**[19:04] yu**
But whether you get recycled
for rice porridge the next day
**[19:06] yu**
is up to you!
**[19:12] yu**
True Love Attack!
**[19:25] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[19:40] yu**
Love is over!
**[19:43] ryu**
Hey, he's from C class...
**[19:45] io**
Oh, I remember him.
**[19:47] atsu**
Someone definitely made him a monster, then.
**[19:50] yu**
Speaking of which, we forgot to
ask about the monsters' boss!
**[19:54] en**
That's a proper use of "speaking
of which," at least.
**[20:05] yu**
Senpai!
**[20:06] yu**
What's that there?
**[20:10] haru**
Five of them, and not a
decent-looking one in the bunch.
**[20:12] haru**
Just trash from start to finish.
**[20:14] aki**
Really?
**[20:15] aki**
I suppose there might be one
or two eccentrics out there
**[20:18] aki**
who they might appeal to.
**[20:21] yu**
What was that, you guys?!
**[20:23] ryu**
If they're blurring their faces like that...
**[20:26] io**
They must be using advanced
technology like ours.
**[20:30] en**
And they seem to be naturally rude.
**[20:32] atsu**
Not pleasant at all.
**[20:35] haru**
I see no reason to be
considerate of your feelings.
**[20:39] aki**
We're inconsiderately
**[20:41] aki**
going to be wiping you out soon, after all.
**[20:45] ryu**
The hell do you mean "wiping us out"?
**[20:48] haru**
We, the VEPPer,
**[20:49] haru**
cannot allow your continued existence.
**[20:53] haru**
Understand, loser nerds?
**[20:55] io**
Are you trying to pick a fight with us?
**[20:58] aki**
Did you finally catch on?
**[21:01] aki**
You're awfully slow on the
uptake. It worries me.
**[21:10] dada**
That's enough for today.
**[21:13] dada**
We don't want you catching
their nerd lameness.
**[21:16] aki**
You're so right, Dadacha.
**[21:19] haru**
Well, you're not going to have
a comfortable night from now on.
**[21:22] haru**
Keep that in mind, loser nerds.
**[21:24] en**
Wait, you...
**[21:29] yu**
Just who were those guys?
**[21:39] go**
What's all this?
**[21:40] haru**
You're horribly in our way, apes.
**[21:42] aki**
Come on, you're making trouble.
**[21:45] aki**
Make way.
**[21:52] haru**
Chopping wood?
**[21:53] aki**
That must be hard work.
**[21:54] go**
Oh, thank you.
**[21:57] both**
Excuse us.
**[22:10] go**
What was that all about?
**[22:20] guard**
We, the Beppu Apes
**[22:21] guard**
stand ready to serve you.
Haru-sama, Aki-sama.
**[22:25] guard**
Your wish is our command.
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** Brotherly Love
**[24:01] en**
Next time, "Brotherly Love."
**[24:04] en**
Love Making!
**[24:05] ---**
# 3 - Brotherly Love
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] dada**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] yu**
--
**[00:00] dada**
--
**[00:20] (Flashback) go**
What's wrong, Yumoto?
**[00:22] (Flashback) yu**
Big bro...
**[00:23] (Flashback) go**
Were you in a fight?
**[00:24] (Flashback) yu**
I didn't hit them...
**[00:26] (Flashback) yu**
because you always tell me...
**[00:27] (Flashback) yu**
it's not good to hit friends...
**[00:31] (Flashback) go**
They hit you, but you didn't fight back?
**[00:37] (Flashback) go**
Good job, Yumoto.
**[00:39] (Flashback) yu**
Big bro!
**[00:41] (Flashback) go**
Listen, Yumoto. The moon is
there, even during the day.
**[00:47] (Flashback) go**
Morning and night, it stands
watch over you from the sky.
**[00:51] (Flashback) go**
And me, too.
**[00:52] (Flashback) go**
When you're suffering, when
you're sad, look up at the sky.
**[00:56] (Flashback) go**
The daytime moon and your big brother
**[00:58] (Flashback) go**
are always watching over you.
**[01:01] (Flashback) yu**
I understand, Big bro!
***SIGN*** Brotherly Love
**[02:43] at**
What?
**[02:44] at**
Reading to kindergarteners?
**[02:46] yu**
Yeah!
**[02:47] yu**
With the student council studying abroad,
**[02:49] yu**
the teachers asked the Defense
Club to do it instead!
**[02:52] en**
Huh?
**[02:53] en**
Our seats...
**[02:55] ryu**
Someone's in our usual spot.
**[02:57] io**
Who cares if someone else sits there?
**[02:59] en**
You know the saying. Home
is where the heart is.
**[03:02] en**
Anyway, what's going on?
**[03:03] en**
Who are they?
**[03:04] at**
I heard we got some exchange
students recently.
**[03:07] at**
Maybe it's them?
**[03:08] en**
Huh?
**[03:09] en**
So what about the crowd?
***SIGN*** Beppu Brothers
***SIGN*** Overwhelming support from
young female fans!!
And male fans too?!
***SIGN*** Examining the Hot and Handsome
Beppu Brother Idols!
Digging into this mysterious
duo's personal lives......
***SIGN*** Beppu Haruhiko
Birthday: August 21st
Leo Blood Tpe AB
Interests: Bonsai
Favorite food: Rice balls
Hated food: Carrots
***SIGN*** Beppu Akihiko:
Birthday: August 21st
Leo Blood Type AB
Hobby: Calligraphy
Favorite food: Rice balls
Hated food: Green peppers
**[03:11] io**
The detective I hired says
they're the Beppu twins.
**[03:16] io**
Very handsome, excellent grades.
**[03:18] io**
They earned the title "eternal pretty boys"
**[03:20] io**
in the Pretty Boy Contest the other day.
**[03:23] io**
And they already have a follower
clique known as the "Beppu Apes."
**[03:28] en**
Yeah, let's sit somewhere else.
**[03:33] en**
So, Yumoto. What was that about
reading to kindergarteners?
**[03:36] yu**
You'll do it, En-chan-senpai?!
**[03:39] en**
No, I don't think I could
handle reading to little kids.
**[03:43] at**
It sounds like a nice idea, but...
**[03:45] ryu**
It would be one thing if it were a
co-ed event with a girls' high school.
**[03:48] io**
I never volunteer my services
without compensation.
**[03:52] wom**
I believe that activities that spread love
**[03:54] wom**
are something the Defense Club
should always take part in!
**[03:56] kat**
Why?!
**[03:57] kat**
Why do you hesitate?
**[03:59] kat**
Why?
**[04:00] kat**
Why were *you* chosen?!
**[04:03] kat**
To be a child development volunteer...
**[04:05] kat**
Those shining smiles of local children...
**[04:08] aya**
Why?
**[04:09] aya**
Why is it not me?!
**[04:12] en**
I think there's a crazy in our midst.
**[04:14] at**
Um...
**[04:15] at**
You're Katari-kun, right?
**[04:17] at**
From the Speaking Poets Society...
**[04:19] kat**
Yes.
**[04:20] kat**
I am Katari Tagaru.
***SIGN*** Katari Tagaru
**[04:22] kat**
Representative of the Binan High School
association, the Speaking Poets Society.
**[04:25] kat**
Because! To enjoy something is to speak
of it. In other words, to recite.
**[04:30] kat**
Humans are speaking mammals.
**[04:31] kat**
I am the world's mouthpiece!
**[04:34] ryu**
Yeah, he's a crazy.
**[04:36] io**
He called himself a representative,
**[04:37] io**
but he's the Speaking Poets
Society's only member.
**[04:40] en**
Yeah, I feel my soul crying out to
me, "Be somewhere else right now."
**[04:45] at**
Well, Katari-kun. See you later.
**[04:47] yu**
What are you guys doing?
**[04:48] yu**
What about reading to the kindergartners?
**[04:50] kat**
Nothing!
**[04:52] kat**
The art of recitation is beyond them!
**[04:54] kat**
Nonsense!
**[04:55] kat**
Only I can handle it!
**[04:58] haru**
What are you trembling for?
**[05:00] haru**
Are you mad?
**[05:02] aki**
Stop it, Haru.
**[05:04] aki**
I know that angry people are funny,
**[05:06] aki**
but if you tease them, they
might take it out on you.
**[05:09] kat**
You two...
**[05:10] kat**
You're the Beppu siblings
everyone's talking about.
**[05:12] haru**
Yes.
**[05:13] haru**
I am Haruhiko, the younger.
**[05:15] aki**
Akihiko, the elder.
**[05:17] aki**
Together, we are...
**[05:18] haru**
The school's...
**[05:19] aki**
...idols...
**[05:20] both**
...the Beppu Brothers!
**[05:22] aki**
Now, why are you...
**[05:24] haru**
...mad at the Defense Club?
**[05:26] ka**
Because!
**[05:27] ka**
I say "no thank you" to any
out-loud reading done by them!
**[05:30] ka**
Such an act requires expressiveness!
**[05:32] ka**
That's something only I can do!
**[05:35] haru**
I don't quite get it...
**[05:36] aki**
...but you *are* very funny!
**[05:40] dada**
He seems usable.
**[05:42] dada**
This is our chance to crush
the Defense Club into bit parts.
**[05:45] aki**
Crush them into bit parts?
**[05:47] both**
Nice one.
**[05:49] en**
Seriously, it's not happening.
**[05:53] en**
I'm not reciting any folktales
to kindergartners.
**[05:56] ryu**
Yeah, same.
**[05:57] ryu**
Reciting pillow talk to
high school girls, maybe.
**[06:00] io**
Sorry to repeat myself,
but I don't work for free.
**[06:03] at**
We've been through this over and over again.
**[06:05] yu**
But I really want to do it!
**[06:08] wom**
Everyone, the volunteer spirit
is the very foundation of love!
**[06:11] wom**
To give is, itself, love!
Why won't you do it?!
**[06:15] en**
'Cause it's a pain in the neck?
**[06:17] at**
But folktales are surprisingly
trendy, aren't they?
**[06:20] at**
I always used to watch that anime,
**[06:22] at**
*"Folktales From Japan".*
**[06:25] en**
Well, *The Crane's Gift* and
*Momotaro* and such aside,
**[06:29] en**
there's The *Crying Red Ogre* and
other obscure classics, I suppose.
**[06:33] io**
And the story of *The Gold
Axe and the Silver Axe*
**[06:36] io**
contains good advice for those
entering the world of investment.
**[06:39] io**
"When a deal sounds too good,
there's always a catch."
**[06:42] ryu**
I think *Urashima Taro* is my favorite.
**[06:45] ryu**
That Otohime, you know?
**[06:47] ryu**
I'd go a summer-long romance with her!
**[06:50] yu**
I always liked *Jizo and the Hats*!
**[06:53] yu**
My brother and I used to
play Jizo and the Hats!
**[06:55] at**
"Play"?
**[06:56] yu**
It's a game we'd play on snowy
days. We'd weave hats out of sedge.
***SIGN*** Candy
***SIGN*** Sweet Dumplings
**[06:59] yu**
Then I had to give them to the Jizo statues
without trading them for snacks in town.
**[07:03] en**
That's a game? Really?
**[07:05] yu**
My brother used fun games to
teach me all kinds of things.
**[07:10] en**
Really?
**[07:11] at**
Gora-san is truly an inscrutible person.
**[07:13] yu**
The Jizo and the Hats game...
**[07:15] yu**
that really takes me back...
**[07:17] yu**
One day when it snowed, I
was five years old, I think.
**[07:21] (Flashback) go**
Listen, Yumoto.
**[07:23] (Flashback) go**
I'm heading out for work.
**[07:26] (Flashback) go**
I want you to do something
nice while I'm gone.
**[07:30] (Flashback) go**
That's right.
**[07:30] (Flashback) go**
Take these hats to the Jizo
statues outside of town.
**[07:35] (Flashback) go**
Don't stray from the path no matter what.
**[07:38] (Flashback) go**
Got it?
**[07:39] (Flashback) yu**
Yeah, got it!
**[07:40] yu**
So I started for the Jizo statues,
just like my bro told me...
**[07:46] yu**
But I ran into a trap!
**[07:48] en**
A trap?
**[07:49] (Flashback) man**
Hey, boy.
**[07:51] (Flashback) man**
You've got some nice-looking hats there.
**[07:53] (Flashback) yu**
I'm selling steamed buns here.
**[07:55] (Flashback) yu**
Wanna trade?
**[07:57] (Flashback) yu**
They look delicious!
**[07:58] (Flashback) man**
Well? Want to trade?
**[08:00] (Flashback) yu**
Yeah!
**[08:02] (Flashback) yu**
Yes! Let's eat...
**[08:06] (Flashback) go**
Listen, Yumoto.
**[08:08] (Flashback) go**
Don't stray from the path no matter what.
**[08:11] (Flashback) yu**
No, I shouldn't.
**[08:13] (Flashback) yu**
I can't accept this.
**[08:15] (Flashback) yu**
But I'll still give you the hat.
**[08:17] (Flashback) yu**
I'm sorry.
**[08:18] ryu**
Wait, you gave him the hat?
**[08:21] yu**
Yeah.
**[08:22] yu**
But I didn't take the steamed bun.
**[08:24] io**
So what about the four other hats?
**[08:27] yu**
I gave them to the Jizo statues.
**[08:30] yu**
But...
**[08:32] yu**
There were five Jizo statues,
and I was missing one hat.
**[08:35] yu**
I didn't realize until then that
that's why Bro gave me five.
***SIGN*** Oh no! I don't have enough!
**[08:41] yu**
So I had to take off my own scarf
and put it on the Jizo statue.
**[08:45] at**
Just like in the story, right?
**[08:47] (Flashback) yu**
I'm sorry I don't have a hat for you...
**[08:54] (Flashback) go**
Yumoto...
**[08:55] (Flashback) go**
You did a very good thing.
**[08:57] (Flashback) yu**
Bro...
**[09:00] at**
Gora-san came to watch, huh?
**[09:02] yu**
Yeah.
**[09:03] yu**
Because the snow was falling
so hard, and he got worried.
**[09:07] ryu**
Your brother sounds like a real worrywart.
**[09:10] at**
Like a parent watching over a
kid running their first errand.
**[09:12] wom**
Gora-san's brotherly love for
Yumoto-san is higher than the sky
**[09:16] wom**
and deeper than the sea!
**[09:19] yu**
Anyway, I want to tell
little kids those folktales
**[09:22] yu**
just like my brother did for me.
**[09:25] gora**
Yumoto...
**[09:27] at**
So, what should we do?
**[09:28] ryu**
If Yumoto wants to do it that badly...
**[09:31] io**
It's hard to refuse out of hand.
**[09:32] io**
Even if I must work for free.
**[09:34] en**
Are you guys seriously leaning
towards reading to the kids?
**[09:41] yu**
Big bro, what's wrong?
**[09:42] go**
Yumoto, reading to others *is* love!
**[09:45] go**
Do it right.
**[09:52] yu**
Yeah! Bro, I'll do my best!
**[09:55] en**
Yeah, we're definitely gonna end
up reading to the kids, aren't we?
**[09:59] at**
Looks like it.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club
Reading Folktales
to Kindergartners
Event Coming Up!
**[10:08] kat**
Unbelievable!
**[10:09] kat**
How could they go over my head
and give it to the Defense Club?!
**[10:12] kat**
Illegal!
**[10:14] kat**
All recitation opportunities
should fall to me!
**[10:17] haru**
Look at that jealousy.
**[10:19] aki**
It's truly petty.
**[10:21] haru**
But those flames of petty jealousy
**[10:23] haru**
that others can't understand...
**[10:26] aki**
...can soon become raging infernos.
**[10:28] dada**
If we want to crush the Defense Club,
**[10:30] dada**
using Katari Tagaru is the best way.
**[10:34] haru**
The Defense Club...
**[10:36] both**
I don't like them.
**[10:37] dada**
Let's take 'em out.
***SIGN*** The Flashing Prince Battle Lover Cerulean Finishing Move: Cerulean Love Aqua
**[10:47] kat**
What?
**[10:49] kat**
Just what are they planning to
read to those kindergartners?
**[10:53] kat**
When...
**[10:54] kat**
The moment any one of
them flubs even slightly,
**[10:56] kat**
I shall mercilessly hijack their performance!
**[11:00] yu**
I really think I want to do the story
of *Jizo and the Hats* for the kids.
**[11:05] yu**
What do you think?
**[11:07] ryu**
It doesn't really matter to me.
**[11:09] io**
I also have no objection, aside
from the lack of compensation.
**[11:13] yu**
This reminded me.
**[11:15] yu**
It's because my brother read
folktales to me every night
**[11:18] yu**
that I never felt lonely as a child.
**[11:22] at**
Your parents have been gone that long?
**[11:25] yu**
Yeah! Bro says they're busy
with their hot springs tour.
**[11:31] en**
That seems a bit suspect.
**[11:32] at**
Well, I guess everyone
has their circumstances.
**[11:35] io**
Does that mean Gora-san's been
your caretaker in every respect?
**[11:40] yu**
Yeah!
**[11:41] yu**
From feeding me to brushing my
teeth, my brother did it all!
**[11:45] yu**
My brother's lap was so warm...
**[11:50] yu**
What is this feeling?
**[11:52] at**
It tugs at the heart strings, huh?
**[11:54] wom**
Because Gora-san looked after him even
when he was still in high school himself!
**[11:59] io**
I brushed my own teeth, at least.
**[12:02] io**
Even as a child.
**[12:03] en**
Hey, didn't we forbid you from
talking about tooth-brushing?
**[12:07] at**
En-chan, there's no need to
air out that old laundry.
**[12:16] kat**
Jesus!
**[12:18] kat**
The Defense Club has come
together for the reading!
***SIGN*** Jizo and the Hats
**[12:22] kat**
Nonsense!
**[12:24] kat**
Such work was meant for me!
**[12:27] dada**
His flame of jealousy is
burning even brighter.
**[12:35] gora**
You can't wage war on an empty stomach.
**[12:37] gora**
Eat, Yumoto, along with your comrades!
**[12:39] yu**
Thanks, Bro!
**[12:42] yu**
They're delicious, Bro!
**[12:44] yu**
But we're reading to kids.
We're not waging war.
**[12:48] go**
Life is an ongoing battle to
convey one's love to others.
**[12:51] go**
Reading aloud to children
**[12:54] go**
is a battle to make those
children feel loved.
**[12:57] yu**
Got it, Bro!
**[12:59] haru**
Look at him!
**[13:00] haru**
Does he really think he's
worthy to eat those riceballs?
**[13:03] aki**
Look at him, stuffing his face
without a care in the world...
**[13:06] aki**
It's unforgivable.
**[13:09] dada**
Flames of jealousy allow
Galaxy Idols The VEPPer
**[13:12] dada**
to shine ever brighter.
**[13:18] kat**
*Jizo and the Hats* is about a
poor yet kind elderly couple
**[13:22] kat**
who find Jizo statues on the
roadside covered in snow,
**[13:25] kat**
and give them the sedge hats they made to
sell for money to them, expecting no reward.
**[13:29] kat**
Then, later,
**[13:30] kat**
the Jizo statues come to return
the favor in heartwarming fashion.
**[13:34] kat**
Difficult!
**[13:36] kat**
There's no way the Defense
Club could handle it!
**[13:38] kid**
That guy's creepy!
**[13:40] kid**
Shh! He's probably a crazy!
**[13:42] kid**
Hey, it's starting!
**[13:45] en**
So why are we the Jizo statues?
**[13:48] at**
Is now the time?
**[13:49] io**
We ended up doing it as a performance.
**[13:53] io**
I don't like to admit it,
**[13:55] io**
but I invested a lot of my
personal funds into this set.
**[13:59] yu**
Wow!
**[14:00] yu**
Cool!
**[14:01] yu**
It really looks just like
the world of a folktale!
**[14:06] gora**
Yumoto...
**[14:08] both**
I don't like it.
**[14:12] yu**
Oh! I have failed to sell
my hats once again today!
**[14:14] kat**
Not great!
**[14:16] kat**
What a stiff reading!
**[14:18] gora**
Excellent job, Yumoto.
**[14:19] gora**
You're doing perfectly.
**[14:21] yu**
How awful!
**[14:23] yu**
These Jizo statues are covered in snow!
**[14:26] yu**
I have got to help them!
**[14:32] yu**
I am lacking one hat!
**[14:34] yu**
What am I to do?
**[14:36] yu**
I know!
**[14:41] yu**
So cold!
**[14:43] kid**
I like that old man!
**[14:44] kid**
But I think the Jizo is choking...
**[14:46] gora**
Yumoto.
**[14:48] gora**
Your big brother will warm you up later!
**[14:50] kat**
Why?!
**[14:51] kat**
Why are they laughing?!
**[14:53] kat**
This is supposed to be a moving scene!
**[15:02] dada**
*Welcome to the VEPP Theater.*
**[15:06] both**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[15:13] both**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[15:16] both**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[15:35] both**
The twin stars shining in the heaven!
**[15:37] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[15:38] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[15:41] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[15:45] both**
Chosen warrior!
**[15:47] haru**
Lucky you!
**[15:49] aki**
Happy you!
**[15:52] both**
Shooting...
**[15:53] both**
Star!
**[16:02] mic**
I will recite... the folktale!
**[16:05] mic**
Because...
**[16:06] mic**
I want to move the children's souls!
**[16:08] mic**
Yes, the one who loves recitation,
**[16:13] mic**
and longs to recite...
**[16:14] mic**
Mic Monster!
**[16:17] wom**
E-E-Everyone!
**[16:18] wom**
A suspicious intruder! Well,
I'm in no position to judge...
**[16:22] en**
Seriously?
**[16:23] at**
At a time like this?
**[16:24] yu**
Why, you...
**[16:26] yu**
the kids were feeling
really moved by the story!
**[16:29] yu**
I want to inspire those kids
the way my brother inspired me!
**[16:34] gora**
Yumoto...
**[16:35] gora**
You've grown up so much...
**[16:37] wom**
Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
**[16:43] yu**
Love Making!
**[16:49] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[16:51] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[16:54] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[16:56] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[16:58] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[17:00] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[17:04] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[17:06] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[17:08] ryu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[17:10] ryu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[17:17] en**
This love-filled planet will
not abide those who lack love!
**[17:21] ryu**
Those who wield loveless
power must kneel before love!
**[17:25] io**
Love is power!
**[17:26] io**
Love is hope!
**[17:28] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[17:29] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[17:31] yu**
Love!
**[17:32] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[17:36] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[17:37] yu**
Feel the power...
**[17:39] five**
Of love!
**[17:42] mic**
I'm the prince of microphones, Mic Monster!
**[17:45] mic**
Listen! I'll let you hear a true recitation!
**[17:48] mic**
Ladies and gentlemen, watch as I bring
a moving end to this performance!
**[17:51] kid**
Is it a hero show now?
**[17:53] kid**
The blur-faces are funny!
**[17:54] mic**
Once... upon a time...
off... in the mountains...
**[17:55] yu**
Hey, you!
**[17:56] yu**
If you want to move someone, the skill
of the performance doesn't matter!
**[18:00] yu**
As long as you're giving it everything
you have, the feeling will get through!
**[18:02] mic**
Silence, amateur!
**[18:04] mic**
I'll show you the power of a true reciter!
**[18:11] mic**
Take this! Cry of my soul!
***SIGN*** Soul Cry
**[18:16] en**
"Soul" hurts!
**[18:18] at**
Yeah, the kanji does have a lot of strokes!
**[18:19] ryu**
"Cry" hurts a lot, too!
**[18:22] mic**
Do you see now?
**[18:24] mic**
My attacks are cries from my soul!
**[18:26] mic**
My words take form and become weapons!
**[18:30] en**
I don't get it!
**[18:32] at**
Just watch out for flying kanji!
**[18:34] mic**
Next up... all of my resentment!
***SIGN*** Resentment
**[18:39] en**
"Resentment" hurts, too!
**[18:41] yu**
And it's heavy, as well!
**[18:45] io**
My set!
**[18:47] io**
I spent a lot of money on that...
**[18:51] ryu**
And I threw away my pride to play a Jizo!
**[18:53] ryu**
Don't get in our way!
**[18:55] mic**
Shut up!
**[18:57] mic**
I have a dream!
**[18:58] mic**
A dream to make others
weep at my performance...
***SIGN*** Dream
**[19:06] mic**
Come true, my dream!
**[19:12] en**
"Dream" hurts, too!
**[19:14] atsu**
And he's pretty annoying.
**[19:16] kid**
That monster is scary!
**[19:16] kid**
Keep fighting, blurry guys!
**[19:19] gora**
Rise again, Yumoto!
**[19:21] yu**
You...
**[19:22] yu**
For whose sake do you speak?!
**[19:25] mic**
What?!
**[19:26] yu**
Love is something you give to others!
**[19:28] yu**
That's what my brother taught me!
**[19:31] go**
That's right, Yumoto...
**[19:32] go**
Give, and it shall be given to you!
**[19:35] go**
To give is true love!
**[19:37] yu**
My brother's folktales probably
weren't read all that well!
**[19:41] yu**
But they always moved me!
**[19:43] yu**
Because even though he was
probably exhausted and sleepy,
**[19:46] yu**
he'd tell them just for me!
**[19:48] yu**
Because my brother's stories
were full of his love!
**[19:52] (Flashback) go**
Yumoto.
**[19:53] (Flashback) go**
Sweet dreams.
**[19:55] yu**
What's important isn't the
skill of the performance!
**[19:58] yu**
It's the love!
**[19:58] both**
Love!
**[20:01] yu**
Let's go! Scarlet Love Lumiere!
***SIGN*** Love
**[20:08] mon**
Love is here!
**[20:10] yu**
Now!
**[20:12] yu**
Hit him with our love!
**[20:15] yu**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[20:19] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[20:22] at**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[20:26] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[20:29] ryu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[20:44] yu**
True Love Attack!
**[20:57] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[21:14] yu**
Love is over!
**[21:15] kids**
Yeah!
**[21:35] ryu**
These are great!
**[21:36] en**
Tastes like mom's home cooking, huh?
**[21:38] at**
Yeah.
**[21:42] yu**
Bro,
**[21:43] yu**
this reminded me.
**[21:46] yu**
Even though you were
always so busy with work,
**[21:49] yu**
you'd say that you were always watching me.
**[21:52] yu**
That you were watching out
for me, day and night,
**[21:55] yu**
like the moon in the daytime sky.
**[21:59] go**
Yeah.
**[22:02] go**
You've grown, Yumoto.
***SIGN*** Curse
**[22:17] haru**
Hakone Yumoto. He's truly in our way.
**[22:20] aki**
Yes. The Defense Club has to go.
**[22:23] dada**
Don't be so impatient, my twins.
**[22:25] dada**
The curtain of battle has only just gone up.
**[24:01] at**
Next time: The Synchronicity of Love.
***SIGN*** Next time
***SIGN*** The Synchronicity of Love
**[24:04] at**
Love making!
**[24:05] ---**
# 4 - The Synchronicity of Love
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] dada**
--
**[00:00] aki**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] io**
--
**[00:11] all**
Haru-sama!
**[00:12] all**
Aki-sama!
**[00:14] all**
Haru-sama!
**[00:15] haru**
They're so annoying.
**[00:15] all**
Aki-sama!
**[00:16] aki**
They're becoming a
neighborhood nuisance, too.
**[00:20] yu**
Nice to see you guys again today!
**[00:21] yu**
Please take one of these!
**[00:23] yu**
They're coupons for our bath!
**[00:24] kid**
Thanks!
**[00:25] kid**
Thanks a bunch!
**[00:27] go**
Great job, Yumoto.
**[00:29] go**
That's very considerate of you.
**[00:33] haru**
It's him!
**[00:35] aki**
Haru, I know what you're thinking.
**[00:38] haru**
Aki, you feel the same way?
**[00:40] aki**
Yes...
**[00:42] both**
We are not amused.
**[00:44] dada**
So why not just get rid of him?
***SIGN*** The Synchronicity of Love
**[02:28] yu**
Oh yeah, senpai!
**[02:30] yu**
You hear this a lot at barbers
and beauty shops and stuff.
**[02:33] yu**
"Do you feel itchy anywhere?"
**[02:36] en**
I guess you still do hear that.
**[02:38] atsu**
Yeah, that's a line you only
hear at places like that.
**[02:43] yu**
But I hear twins know that
kind of thing without asking!
**[02:47] yu**
If their twin is feeling itchy or something.
**[02:49] ryu**
Seriously?
**[02:50] yu**
Seriously!
**[02:51] ryu**
Which means they can seriously
scratch anywhere they feel itchy?
**[02:53] yu**
They seriously can!
**[02:54] yu**
Twins are amazing, huh?
**[02:56] yu**
They know just where the other feels itchy!
**[02:59] en**
Hey Atsushi, why are we talking about twins?
**[03:04] atsu**
It's probably because of those Italian twins
**[03:07] atsu**
transferring here right on the
heels of the Beppu Siblings.
**[03:10] en**
Another set of twins?
**[03:12] en**
And why are they Italian?
**[03:14] atsu**
That's a very good question.
**[03:17] yu**
They're the Salvatores,
and they're really rugged.
**[03:20] io**
When you say "rugged," you
mean their facial features?
**[03:22] ryu**
What else could he mean?
**[03:24] io**
Well, lots of other things...
**[03:27] en**
Like sideburns or chest hair, or something.
**[03:29] ai**
Yeah, I bet they've got that.
**[03:32] en**
They say someone rich in
hair is also rich in spirit.
**[03:35] en**
Is that true?
**[03:37] atsu**
I don't know.
**[03:38] atsu**
I think it's an old wives tale?
**[03:40] yu**
Rich in hair means rich in spirit?
**[03:43] yu**
I guess that's why Gora is like that!
**[03:46] en**
Gora is hairy?
**[03:48] atsu**
He doesn't give off that vibe...
**[03:51] yu**
Well, he's hairier than me!
**[03:52] ryu**
That's just because you're smooth all over.
**[03:56] ryu**
But yeah, I've heard that, too.
**[03:58] ryu**
The rich in hair and spirit thing.
**[04:00] io**
I've heard that, too.
**[04:02] io**
Though I expelled it from my mind, as
there was no profit to be gained from it.
**[04:06] yu**
That's right!
**[04:07] yu**
Wom-san is hairy, too!
**[04:09] yu**
I guess that's why you're so compassionate!
**[04:11] wom**
Please, desist!
**[04:13] wom**
I don't itch anywhere!
**[04:14] yu**
No, I bet you're itchy right here!
**[04:22] haru**
I'm extremely unamused.
**[04:24] haru**
I want Hakone Yumoto extremely gone.
**[04:27] aki**
Haru, I know what you're thinking.
***SIGN*** Monster
**[04:31] aki**
You want to create a monster
to stamp him out, right?
**[04:34] haru**
Yes, yes! That, that!
**[04:37] dada**
In that case...
**[04:39] dada**
Let's make one.
**[04:45] yu**
Today's a minced chicken and egg lunch! Yeah!
**[04:48] tsu**
Gora-san's handmade lunches always
look delicious, don't they?
**[04:51] yu**
They're the best!
**[04:52] yu**
I usually eat rice balls, so once in a while,
**[04:54] yu**
he goes out of his way
to pack a lunch for me.
**[04:58] yu**
Let's eat!
**[05:00] yu**
Huh? There's no spoon...
**[05:05] yu**
You want a bite of my chicken and egg lunch?
**[05:10] haru**
*I want it...*
**[05:12] haru**
*I want it so bad!*
**[05:16] aki**
No, thank you.
**[05:17] haru**
That lunch wasn't made for us.
**[05:24] aki**
This is why I didn't want to
have lunch at the cafeteria.
**[05:28] haru**
But going out of my way to avoid
him gets under my skin, too.
**[05:32] aki**
I can't say I don't sympathise...
**[05:35] haru**
Right?
**[05:36] haru**
I hate them!
**[05:38] ber**
Loves me...
**[05:39] ber**
hates me...
**[05:40] ber**
loves me...
**[05:40] dada**
It appears someone's here.
**[05:42] ber**
hates me...
**[05:43] ber**
loves me...
**[05:45] ber**
hates me...
**[05:48] haru**
You. What are you doing?
**[05:52] ber**
I do beg your pardon!
**[05:54] ber**
I was performing, how do you say,
the Japanese flower fortunetelling!
**[05:58] aki**
Picking flowers in a greenhouse
seems rather tasteless...
**[06:01] ber**
I beg your utmost pardon!
**[06:04] ber**
I was worried about whether my twin
younger brother loves or hates me.
**[06:09] ber**
And before I could think twice, I
began plucking the flower's petals.
**[06:11] aki**
Your twin younger brother?
**[06:13] haru**
You're twins, too?
**[06:15] ber**
Yes!
**[06:16] ber**
My name is Bernardo.
**[06:18] ber**
My little brother is Alan.
**[06:20] ber**
We are the pretty-boy Italian twins,
**[06:22] ber**
acknowledged by both ourselves and others!
**[06:28] aki**
If you're twins,
**[06:30] aki**
can't you just tell what he's thinking?
**[06:32] haru**
We never run into that problem.
**[06:36] ber**
I am so full of envy!
**[06:38] ber**
We were not always this way!
**[06:41] haru**
What a waste.
**[06:43] haru**
Twins, of all people,
should always get along.
**[06:45] ber**
Indeed!
**[06:46] ber**
Twins must always get along!
**[06:50] ber**
And yet I cannot understand
anything my brother is thinking!
**[06:55] haru**
How did that happen?
**[06:58] aki**
You did something to make
him hate you, right?
**[07:00] ber**
It cannot be!
**[07:02] ber**
How can my brother hate me,
when I love him so?
**[07:05] aki**
But your brother must have some reason.
**[07:08] haru**
That's right.
**[07:10] haru**
Because without a reason...
**[07:11] both**
Twins would never, ever hate each other!
**[07:14] aki**
Even if the world turned upside-down...
**[07:17] haru**
We'd still be of one mind in all things.
**[07:20] ber**
What lovely twinly love!
**[07:22] ber**
That is what I would like to have!
**[07:25] ber**
And yet Alan...
**[07:27] ber**
he will not even meet my gaze!
**[07:34] dada**
And so, Bernardo told his story.
**[07:38] dada**
They actually used to be the best of friends.
**[07:43] dada**
But when they hit puberty,
**[07:46] dada**
the little brother changed.
**[07:49] (Flashback) alan**
Brother, I will no longer
take baths with you!
**[07:52] (Flashback) ber**
Why not, Alan?
**[07:54] (Flashback) ber**
Brother...
**[07:55] (Flashback) ber**
you cannot understand how I feel!
**[07:58] ber**
Since then,
**[08:00] ber**
we have never once bathed together.
**[08:04] haru**
I wonder why not.
**[08:05] ber**
I cannot understand!
**[08:07] haru**
It's a mystery, then?
**[08:09] aki**
Yeah.
**[08:10] aki**
It's hard for perfect twins
like us to understand.
**[08:13] dada**
But these estranged twins could be useful.
**[08:16] aki**
Good point.
**[08:18] ber**
I beg of you to help me!
**[08:21] dada**
And so we quickly began trailing
the younger brother, Alan.
**[08:26] dada**
There's Alan!
**[08:28] haru**
He does look a lot like Bernardo.
***SIGN*** Alan Salvatore
**[08:30] aki**
They're as identical as we are.
**[08:33] yu**
Alan!
**[08:35] yu**
I heard they have hot springs in Italy, too!
**[08:40] yu**
My brother says they're called thermae!
**[08:44] alan**
And what of it?
**[08:46] yu**
The truth is, we run a thermae too!
**[08:49] yu**
You can come by with your
twin brother some time!
**[08:52] yu**
Here, a coupon!
**[08:55] alan**
The answer is no!
**[08:57] alan**
I will never go to a thermae with my brother!
**[08:59] alan**
Never!
**[09:00] yu**
What's wrong?
**[09:03] dada**
Hakone Yumoto appears to
have stepped on a landmine.
**[09:07] aki**
Yes.
**[09:08] aki**
It appears that what Bernardo said was true.
**[09:14] [Messenger] sign**
The Piercing Prince
Battle Lover Epinard
Finishing Move: Epinard Love Hurricane
**[09:19] aki**
Could we have a word?
**[09:22] alan**
What is it?
**[09:24] haru**
We are the Beppu siblings.
**[09:26] aki**
We're twins, like you.
**[09:28] alan**
So what?
**[09:30] haru**
Why do you hate your brother?
**[09:32] alan**
H-How did you know...
**[09:34] haru**
Bernardo told us.
**[09:37] aki**
He's worried about you.
**[09:39] alan**
My brother could never
understand my feelings.
**[09:42] alan**
And neither would perfect
twins such as yourselves!
**[09:45] aki**
Well, I agree that we're perfect...
**[09:48] alan**
But we are entirely different!
**[09:51] alan**
There is a wall between my brother and I
**[09:53] alan**
that none could ever surmount!
**[09:57] aki**
We're sorry to pry,
**[09:59] aki**
but could you tell us why it
is that you hate your brother?
**[10:04] haru**
As fellow twins, perhaps we could help.
**[10:07] alan**
I do not wish to say it.
**[10:08] alan**
It is too shameful a
thing for an Italian boy!
**[10:13] haru**
For an Italian boy?
**[10:15] aki**
What does that mean?
**[10:17] alan**
Do not poke at my inferiority complex!
**[10:20] haru**
Oh?
**[10:21] haru**
But I'm sure we'd be able to help.
**[10:24] aki**
We're very helpful to people with complexes.
**[10:27] haru**
Yes, we always side with people
going through hard times.
**[10:31] haru**
In other words...
**[10:33] both**
We're on your side!
**[10:36] alan**
You are the first people who
have ever said such a thing.
**[10:41] alan**
My brother is a good man,
and very considerate.
**[10:44] alan**
But my brother has something which I lack.
**[10:48] aki**
I see.
**[10:49] haru**
That would cause an inferiority complex.
**[10:51] aki**
Then why don't you just take it from him?
**[10:56] alan**
But such a thing cannot be stolen...
**[10:58] haru**
It can.
**[10:59] aki**
If you let us help you, at least.
**[11:01] alan**
Truly?
**[11:03] aki**
Truly!
**[11:04] haru**
So, what is it...
**[11:05] aki**
...that you want?
**[11:08] alan**
Chest hair.
**[11:10] haru**
Huh?
**[11:11] aki**
Chest hair?
**[11:13] aki**
But yes, we'll find a way to help you.
**[11:16] alan**
Truly?
**[11:17] aki**
Yes.
**[11:18] aki**
If you hate your brother, from the bottom
of your heart, for his chest hair.
**[11:23] alan**
Yes, I hate it.
**[11:25] alan**
He has such a fine chest full of hair!
**[11:27] alan**
I envy him, and at the same time, hate him!
**[11:30] aki**
Then...
**[11:30] haru**
...we'll grant your wish.
**[11:42] dada**
* Welcome to the VEPP Theater.*
**[11:44] alan**
What?!
**[11:47] alan**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[11:53] alan**
*Moon and sun, miracles and secrets*
**[11:57] alan**
*We're the stars making wishes come true!*
**[12:00] alan**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[12:02] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[12:06] both**
Chosen warrior!
**[12:06] alan**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[12:08] haru**
Lucky you!
**[12:10] aki**
Happy you!
**[12:10] alan**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[12:12] both**
Shooting...
**[12:13] both**
Star!
**[12:22] aki**
Now we set him on Hakone Yumoto,
and let him tear him to pieces.
**[12:25] haru**
*Hair* him to pieces, you mean.
**[12:30] both**
Suffer! Feel the pain!
**[12:36] yu**
The True Lovracelets!
**[12:37] wom**
Everyone, let's Love Making!
**[12:42] yu**
Love Making!
**[13:09] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[13:12] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[13:15] en**
Love Making.
**[13:26] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[13:27] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[13:30] atsu**
Love Making.
**[13:40] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[13:42] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[13:45] io**
Love Making.
**[13:55] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[13:57] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[13:59] ryu**
Love Making!
**[14:10] ryu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[14:11] ryu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[14:25] en**
This love-filled planet
**[14:27] en**
will not abide those who lack love!
**[14:29] ryu**
Those who wield loveless power
**[14:31] ryu**
must kneel before love!
**[14:33] io**
Love is power!
**[14:34] io**
Love is hope!
**[14:36] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[14:37] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[14:39] yu**
Love!
**[14:40] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[14:43] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[14:45] yu**
Feel the power...
**[14:47] five**
of love!
**[14:50] hair**
Behold my luxurious chest hair!
**[14:52] hair**
I am Chest Hair Monster Alan!
**[14:55] hair**
You are the ones who will feel the power!
**[14:58] en**
He said his real name.
**[15:00] atsu**
Yes, he did.
**[15:01] en**
But what did he say?
**[15:03] en**
That's chest hair?
**[15:04] atsu**
If he says it is, I guess it is.
**[15:07] en**
Overdoing it, isn't he?
**[15:08] ryu**
Over-overdoing it.
**[15:10] io**
Overdoing it so badly, you couldn't pay me ten
million yen to look straight at it.
**[15:14] yu**
You! How did you become a monster?
**[15:17] yu**
Who did this to you?
**[15:18] mon**
That does not matter!
**[15:20] mon**
I will defeat you to vent my complex
**[15:24] mon**
over my brother's chest hair!
**[15:26] en**
He just stated his motivation
in the clearest terms possible.
**[15:29] atsu**
Though it's still incomprehensible.
**[15:31] en**
I don't even care if someone
has chest hair or not.
**[15:36] ryu**
Clean-shaven is more the fashion
nowadays anyway, right?
**[15:39] io**
Yeah. I can't understand it.
**[15:41] alan**
You could never understand!
**[15:45] yu**
I kind of do!
**[15:47] alan**
What?!
**[15:48] en**
Seriously?
**[15:49] atsu**
He understands?
**[15:50] yu**
Yeah!
**[15:51] yu**
Because my brother Gora is hairy and manly,
**[15:55] yu**
and I'm a little jealous of that!
**[15:58] haru**
Is Gora-san hairier than he looks?
**[16:02] haru**
He is very manly, after all.
**[16:04] aki**
I never knew!
**[16:06] haru**
I really can't stand Hakone Yumoto.
**[16:09] haru**
How dare he know everything about Gora-san!
**[16:11] aki**
Get him, Chest Hair Monster!
**[16:13] dada**
Attack!
**[16:15] alan**
Take this! Hairball Beam!
**[16:20] yu**
What?!
**[16:21] en**
Oh, boy... are you kidding me?
**[16:23] atsu**
This is really something...
**[16:24] ryu**
What's going on?!
**[16:25] io**
Please don't look!
**[16:27] yu**
This is all extremely embarrassing!
**[16:30] mon**
Behold, the power of the Hairball Beam!
**[16:34] haru**
How funny!
**[16:35] aki**
A plan to weaken the enemy
through embarrassment?
**[16:40] mon**
Next, I will give you fantastic chest hair!
**[16:45] mon**
Chained Chest Hair Beam!
**[16:48] atsu**
Chained? What?
**[16:50] atsu**
I don't understand.
**[16:57] en**
Oh, is that what "chained" means?
**[17:00] atsu**
I don't think this is the
best time to be impressed.
**[17:03] mon**
Are you not happy to have
such wonderful chest hair?
**[17:06] ryu**
No, not at all!
**[17:08] atsu**
What do we do about this, anyway?
**[17:10] yu**
Is doing this really making you happy?
**[17:12] mon**
What?!
**[17:14] yu**
I'm asking!
**[17:16] yu**
Is having that fake chest hair,
giving us fake chest hair...
**[17:18] yu**
Does that really make you happy?
**[17:22] mon**
Of course it does!
**[17:23] mon**
Chest hair is everything!
**[17:24] mon**
Chest hair is what makes you an Italian boy!
**[17:26] mon**
Bravo, chest hair!
**[17:29] mon**
So, what do we do about this?
**[17:31] atsu**
This monster's a real pain.
**[17:33] ryu**
When they start getting annoying,
don't we usually just purge them?
**[17:36] io**
We wave our little sticks and end it!
**[17:39] wom**
You guys are really raring to go for once!
**[17:42] yu**
No!
**[17:44] en**
Um... why not, exactly?
**[17:46] yu**
Even if we beat him,
**[17:48] yu**
it won't cure him of his
complex about his big brother!
**[17:51] yu**
We need to get them to make up!
**[17:54] en**
I can't entirely deny the logic there...
**[17:56] atsu**
In other words...
**[17:58] yu**
Wom-san, find his big brother!
**[18:01] wom**
Roger that!
**[18:03] ryu**
So do we just stay like this until then?
**[18:05] io**
It appears that we do.
**[18:09] mon**
You make a grand sight
with all that chest hair!
**[18:15] wom**
Everyone!
**[18:16] wom**
Here is the monster's brother, Bernardo-san!
**[18:19] en**
That was fast.
**[18:20] ryu**
*Too* fast!
**[18:22] yu**
That's our Wom-san!
**[18:24] ber**
Alan... is that you, Alan?!
**[18:26] al**
Yes it is, brother!
**[18:28] al**
But I am no longer the Alan you once knew!
**[18:31] al**
Look at this magnificent
chest hair that I have now!
**[18:35] ryu**
I cannot even comprehend why he wants that.
**[18:38] io**
I'm even more baffled than when
one of my investments failed.
**[18:42] yu**
Bernardo!
**[18:43] yu**
You're the only one who can save him!
**[18:46] yu**
You're his big brother!
**[18:48] ber**
Alan...
**[18:50] ber**
I had no idea that my chest hair
was causing you so much pain!
**[18:54] mon**
It is just as I said!
**[18:55] mon**
You could not understand how I feel!
**[18:58] mon**
We were twins, with the
same face, the same body,
**[19:01] mon**
always with the same thoughts
and the same dreams!
**[19:05] mon**
So why am I the only one
deprived of chest hair?!
**[19:10] ber**
Is that why you
**[19:11] ber**
would no longer go to the thermae with me?
**[19:14] mon**
That is right!
**[19:16] mon**
Your chest hair was so
dazzling and so enviable,
**[19:18] mon**
I could no longer stand to see it!
**[19:22] ber**
Then...
**[19:23] ber**
I no longer need chest hair!
**[19:25] mon**
What?!
**[19:26] ber**
I say that if I must lose one of you...
**[19:28] ber**
I would rather lose the chest hair!
**[19:31] mon**
You lie!
**[19:32] mon**
I know that you secretly take
great pride in your chest hair!
**[19:34] ber**
It is no lie!
**[19:36] ber**
I shall prove it to you now!
**[19:41] ber**
This pain is nothing!
**[19:45] en**
This took a turn for the amazing.
**[19:47] at**
That's got to sting a little.
**[19:49] ryu**
No, it's probably extremely painful.
**[19:52] yu**
But he's enduring it!
**[19:54] yu**
Because he wants to make up with his
little brother, even if it hurts!
**[19:58] en**
*This* is bringing tears to your eyes?
**[20:00] haru**
Damn that Hakone Yumoto.
**[20:02] haru**
He got in our way!
**[20:04] aki**
That wolf in sheep's clothing...
**[20:06] yu**
You!
**[20:07] yu**
Do you see the pain your brother's in?
**[20:10] yu**
But he's enduring it
**[20:12] yu**
because he loves you so much!
**[20:15] yu**
He wants to make amends
**[20:17] yu**
and restore your loving sibling relationship!
**[20:20] ber**
That is right!
**[20:21] ber**
To get that back,
**[20:22] ber**
I would sacrifice many
hundreds of chest hairs!
**[20:25] mon**
Please, stop it!
**[20:27] mon**
I... It is my fault!
**[20:30] mon**
Please stop, my brother!
**[20:33] en**
They made up?
**[20:34] at**
But we're still stuck here?
**[20:37] io**
I guess we actually have to purge him.
**[20:40] wom**
Okay then, everyone! Now!
**[20:42] yu**
Yeah!
**[20:44] yu**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[20:49] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[20:52] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[20:55] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[20:59] ryu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[21:06] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[21:23] yu**
Love is over!
**[21:27] alan**
Brother!
**[21:32] yu**
Thank goodness!
**[21:33] go**
Hey! Yumoto!
**[21:37] yu**
Brother!
**[21:38] yu**
What's wrong?
**[21:40] go**
I forgot to include the
spoon for your lunch today.
**[21:44] yu**
Brother!
**[21:44] yu**
Thank you! But I already finished it.
**[21:47] go**
I see.
**[21:48] go**
Well done.
**[21:50] aki**
I know what you're thinking.
**[21:53] haru**
Yeah.
**[21:54] dada**
Don't worry.
**[21:56] dada**
You, the Beppu siblings, are the strongest.
**[22:00] both**
Yeah.
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[22:05] yu**
Huh?
**[22:06] yu**
Bernardo's chest hair is back to normal!
**[22:09] wom**
It must be the power of the Love Fountain!
**[22:12] en**
Can it do that?
**[22:14] at**
I guess it can.
**[22:16] al**
That's my dear big brother!
**[22:18] ber**
Alan...
**[22:20] yu**
I'm so glad you're friends again!
**[22:23] io**
I'm not going to say another word on this.
***SIGN*** Accept Love
***SIGN*** Next Time
**[24:01] io**
Next time, "Accept Love!"
**[24:04] io**
Love Making!
**[24:07] ---**
# 5 - Receive Love!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] shi**
--
**[00:00] both**
--
**[00:00] aki**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
***SIGN*** Oka Shuzo
**[00:22] shi**
What's wrong, Shuzo?!
**[00:24] shi**
Don't shy away from my balls!
**[00:27] shu**
President Munakata...
**[00:28] shu**
I can't take anymore.
**[00:30] shi**
How many times must I tell you?
**[00:32] shi**
The moment you give up
is the moment it's over!
**[00:35] shu**
Then...
**[00:36] shu**
I think it might be over.
**[00:38] shi**
I see.
**[00:40] shi**
It's over, is it?
**[00:42] shi**
Then... *we* are over, too.
**[00:49] shu**
Y-You're horrible!
**[00:52] shi**
Can't anyone handle my balls at full power?
**[00:59] shi**
Attack!
**[01:04] en**
A falling leaf, huh?
**[01:06] atsu**
More accurately, a dead leaf.
**[01:07] ryu**
Huh?
**[01:08] ryu**
Aren't they called autumn leaves?
**[01:09] io**
No, it's fall foliage.
**[01:11] yu**
I guess a lot of things come
falling in autumn, huh?
**[01:15] yu**
For instance...
**[01:15] shi**
Attack!
**[01:21] yu**
Wow!
**[01:23] yu**
It really did come falling!
**[01:26] shi**
He received my ball...
**[01:29] shi**
That's him!
**[01:31] shi**
He's the one I've been looking for...
**[01:33] shi**
the diamond in the rough!
***SIGN*** Receive Love!
***SIGN*** Class 1-A
**[03:24] yu**
Excuse me,
**[03:26] yu**
but you're in my way.
**[03:27] yu**
I'm heading for the bathroom...
**[03:29] shi**
It doesn't look like it.
**[03:30] yu**
Huh? I'm at my limit, actually.
**[03:33] shi**
A man who can keep his cool when
his bladder's at the brink.
**[03:37] shi**
Exceptional mental discipline.
**[03:38] shi**
No wonder you could receive my balls.
**[03:42] yu**
"My balls"?
**[03:44] shi**
I am Muna! Kata!
**[03:46] shi**
Shigoki!
**[03:47] yu**
Munakata Shigoki?
**[03:49] shi**
President of the Binan High
School volleyball club!
**[03:52] yu**
Oh...
**[03:52] yu**
Oh, you got a ballet dancer
as your club advisor by mistake!
**[03:56] shi**
We've been working without
an advisor since then.
**[03:59] yu**
Really?
**[04:00] yu**
I'm glad to hear it!
**[04:01] yu**
Well, I'm off to the bathroom...
**[04:03] shi**
First, you must decide.
**[04:05] shi**
Will you join my volleyball club, or not?
**[04:08] yu**
Me?
**[04:09] shi**
If you join, I will let you pass.
**[04:12] yu**
Fine.
**[04:13] yu**
Since I'm really gonna wet myself...
**[04:15] shi**
You mean it?
**[04:15] yu**
I mean it!
**[04:17] yu**
So please, hurry...
**[04:17] shi**
I see!
**[04:18] shi**
Then...
**[04:19] shi**
I need four more!
**[04:20] yu**
I've got it handled!
**[04:22] shi**
Good. Go!
**[04:25] shi**
I have my team.
**[04:26] shi**
It's about to begin...
**[04:28] shi**
my burning youth of sweat and tears!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[04:34] en**
Hey, can you spell it?
**[04:37] atsu**
Huh? Spell what?
**[04:38] en**
Volleyball.
**[04:40] atsu**
Yeah, I can spell that.
**[04:41] io**
That's middle-school level vocabulary.
**[04:44] ryu**
That spelling always tripped me up.
**[04:48] en**
What about you, Yumoto?
**[04:50] yu**
Huh? What grade do you think I'm in?
**[04:53] en**
Then what's the first letter?
**[04:55] yu**
It's "bareiball", so B, of course!
**[04:58] en**
I knew it.
**[04:59] yu**
Huh?
**[05:00] yu**
Was I wrong?
**[05:01] io**
It's not B. It's V.
**[05:03] io**
Incidentally, the proper
pronunciation is "volleyball."
**[05:06] yu**
Huh?
**[05:07] yu**
But thinking it started with
a B hasn't hurt me so far.
**[05:11] en**
Well, true enough.
**[05:13] ryu**
Oh, I know!
**[05:15] ryu**
Is that why it's a V-sign?
**[05:20] shi**
What are you all doing here?!
**[05:23] shi**
Time for training!
**[05:24] shi**
Everyone get together!
**[05:25] atsu**
Training?
**[05:26] en**
Who are you again?
**[05:28] shi**
I'm the president of the volleyball club!
**[05:30] shi**
Muna! Kata! Shigoki!
**[05:32] yu**
Oh, that's right!
**[05:34] yu**
As of today, the Defense Club
is joining the volleyball club!
**[05:37] all**
Huh?
**[05:38] yu**
That's weird.
**[05:39] yu**
Here we were, talking about volleyball,
**[05:41] yu**
and I completely forgot to mention it!
**[05:43] en**
You are so...
**[05:46] shi**
Anyway, get changed immediately!
**[05:48] shi**
Meet me in the gym in thirty seconds!
**[05:51] all**
S-Seriously?
**[05:57] shi**
Great job, Yumoto!
**[05:59] shi**
Receive all my balls!
**[06:02] en**
How did we end up in the
volleyball club again?
**[06:05] at**
How did Yumoto needing to
pee get us into this mess?
**[06:09] io**
Darn it...
**[06:10] io**
This is an entirely unprofitable venture.
**[06:14] ryu**
If only there were some
girls watching, at least...
**[06:16] shi**
Hey, you four!
**[06:17] shi**
What are you doing?
**[06:19] shi**
You need to receive my balls, too!
**[06:21] en**
His balls?
**[06:22] io**
I really wish he'd stop saying it
that way. I'm getting the shivers.
**[06:25] at**
The shivers? I wish.
**[06:26] at**
He's so on fire he's giving me heatstroke.
**[06:29] ryu**
His balls, huh?
**[06:31] ryu**
Okay,
**[06:32] ryu**
I'm gonna hit the hell out of them!
**[06:35] ryu**
Bring it!
**[06:37] shi**
Let's go!
**[06:38] shi**
See if you can even touch my balls!
**[06:44] shi**
What are you doing?
**[06:45] shi**
Don't take your eyes off my balls!
**[06:47] at**
He wants us to look at his balls.
**[06:49] en**
I'd really rather not.
**[06:50] io**
Um... can we just go?
**[06:53] en**
Yeah...
**[06:55] shi**
Quit chatting and get on the court!
**[06:58] shi**
All of you, receive my balls together!
**[07:07] shi**
Why are you evading?
**[07:09] shi**
This isn't dodgeball!
**[07:10] shi**
All of you, receive my balls!
**[07:12] yu**
Leave this to me!
**[07:16] en**
Why is he enjoying this so much?
**[07:19] ryu**
Maybe he likes playing with balls?
**[07:21] io**
At least say "he likes ball games."
**[07:26] yu**
Fight!
**[07:27] yu**
Fight!
**[07:29] shi**
Gaze at the setting sun!
**[07:31] shi**
All of you, race for the setting sun!
**[07:33] en**
Sunset on an embankment?
**[07:35] at**
The situation's so cliche I can't
even bring myself to protest.
**[07:47] shi**
A bath is the best after a
steamy day of club activities!
**[07:51] yu**
I agree!
**[07:53] en**
I can't take any more.
**[08:10] haru**
The sound of splitting wood...
**[08:12] aki**
Yes, as always...
**[08:16] haru**
What's wrong?
**[08:17] aki**
Someone's hanging around out there.
**[08:20] haru**
Who is that?
**[08:22] dada**
Dinner's ready.
**[08:25] dada**
Come eat, you two.
**[08:28] shi**
Listen up, you guys!
**[08:30] shi**
If you can recieve my balls, you'll
all be the best in the world...
**[08:32] shi**
no, the best on Earth!
**[08:35] yu**
*President!*
**[08:36] yu**
* How is the "best in the world"*
* different from the "best on Earth"?*
**[08:38] shu**
The president is taking a bath with them.
**[08:41] shu**
And I've never had a bath
with him, even once...
**[08:46] go**
Who are you?
**[08:48] go**
A peeping Tom?
**[08:49] shu**
N-No!
**[08:52] go**
Hey!
**[08:53] go**
Get back here!
**[08:55] go**
He's a quick one.
**[09:00] dada**
Today is toasted dumpling hot pot.
**[09:03] dada**
Go on, eat!
**[09:05] haru**
Why did you decide...
**[09:07] aki**
...to make toasted dumpling hot pot?
**[09:09] dada**
Atmosphere, perhaps? Or for the sound of it?
**[09:12] dada**
The "toast" part sounds
like "warm and toasty!"
**[09:15] haru**
"Toast" doesn't necessarily imply that.
**[09:18] aki**
It can also mean "doomed."
**[09:19] dada**
That's not what it's for!
**[09:22] dada**
I was hoping to warm up your
worn-out bodies and souls,
**[09:25] dada**
after an exhausting day of being idols.
**[09:30] dada**
Eat it and be grateful!
**[09:32] haru**
Warm us up...
**[09:33] aki**
...body and...
**[09:35] both**
...soul?
**[09:37] aki**
Go!
**[09:38] haru**
He's so strong! Go!
**[09:40] (Flashback) haru**
That man always warmed us up...
**[09:43] (Flashback) aki**
...so gently, body and...
**[09:46] (Flashback) both**
...soul...
**[09:51] dada**
Okay!
**[09:52] dada**
It's turned out great!
**[09:55] dada**
Now, eat, you two!
**[09:58] dada**
What's wrong?
**[10:01] haru**
Oh...
**[10:01] aki**
...it's nothing.
**[10:02] both**
Nothing at all!
**[10:05] haru**
By the way, there are no carrots—
**[10:07] aki**
—green peppers in there, right?
**[10:10] dada**
Dammit...
**[10:13] shi**
In the end, you're the only one left.
**[10:16] yu**
Huh?
**[10:17] yu**
You're right.
**[10:19] yu**
That's weird.
**[10:21] yu**
Where'd the others go?
**[10:24] en**
I wonder...
**[10:26] atsu**
Huh? Wonder what?
**[10:28] en**
In Japanese, volleyball is called haikyu.
**[10:32] at**
Yeah, and tennis is called teikyu, right?
**[10:36] at**
And soccer is called shukyu.
**[10:39] ryu**
But how do you write haikyu?
**[10:41] io**
It's the "hai" from "excrement"
with the character for ball.
**[10:44] io**
Excrement ball.
**[10:46] ryu**
The hai from excrement?!
**[10:48] ryu**
Then volleyball is crapping out a ball?
**[10:51] en**
Tennis is played on a court with a ball,
**[10:53] en**
so I can understand why it's
written as "court ball."
**[10:56] en**
And soccer is about kicking a ball,
**[10:58] en**
so I can see why it's written as "kick ball."
**[11:02] at**
But why is volleyball
**[11:04] at**
written with the hai from 'excrement'?
**[11:13] aki**
Here.
**[11:13] boys**
Thank you!
**[11:15] boy**
The Apes will worship you for life!
**[11:17] haru**
No problem.
**[11:18] aki**
Come back any time.
**[11:22] dada**
What kind of hot pot do you want today?
**[11:25] dada**
It's the season for crab,
so how about crab hot pot?
**[11:27] dada**
Or what about oysters?
**[11:30] aki**
Huh? He's...
**[11:33] har**
The one from yesterday...
**[11:38] shi**
Practice is over for today!
**[11:40] shi**
Yumoto, I can't believe
you received all my balls!
**[11:44] shi**
You are truly the diamond in the
rough I've been searching for!
**[11:48] shi**
I'll never let you go!
**[11:50] yu**
President! Thank you!
**[11:53] shu**
*"I'll never let you go"?*
**[11:55] shu**
*President...*
**[11:56] shu**
*I thought those words were only for me.*
**[12:00] shu**
*H-He'll pay.*
**[12:07] haru**
The aroma of jealousy.
**[12:09] aki**
I smell it.
**[12:11] [Messenger] sign**
The Roaring Prince
Battle Lover Sulfur
Finishing Move:
Sulfur Love Gaia
**[12:21] shu**
You'll pay.
**[12:23] shu**
President Munakata...
**[12:25] shu**
You said I was the only one...
**[12:28] shu**
You said you wouldn't ever let me go...
**[12:31] shu**
That time, too...
**[12:33] shu**
That time, too...
**[12:35] shu**
I really thought you'd try to stop me..
**[12:39] shu**
But that little...
**[12:47] haru**
So you really...
**[12:48] aki**
...can't stand it, eh?
**[12:50] shu**
Huh?
**[12:51] shu**
Who are you?
**[12:52] haru**
We're...
**[12:53] aki**
...on your side.
**[12:55] shu**
My side?
**[12:57] haru**
You should make him see your true worth...
**[12:59] aki**
...and regret what he's lost.
**[13:02] aki**
That you are a diamond in the rough.
**[13:04] aki**
A little polish would
make you shine even more.
**[13:06] both**
Why not show him that?
**[13:15] gora**
Yumoto, how's the water?
**[13:17] yu**
It's perfect, Gora!
**[13:20] shi**
Yes, thank you as always!
**[13:23] shi**
Why not join us?
**[13:26] gora**
No.
**[13:27] gora**
I'm not worthy to be there.
**[13:31] shi**
It's wonderful that your
brother is so humble.
**[13:36] shi**
This is a hot water that only
such humility can produce.
**[13:38] shi**
But Yumoto, you must be more aggressive
with my balls.
**[13:42] shi**
Come at them thinking,
"I'll never let you fall."
**[13:44] shi**
That's how you win a tournament.
**[13:47] yu**
But President,
**[13:48] yu**
we can't participate in a tournament
if we don't have enough people.
**[13:52] shi**
Yes, I know.
**[13:54] shi**
The truth is,
**[13:56] shi**
I had only one other long-term
club member besides you,
**[13:59] shi**
but he quit recently.
**[14:01] yu**
Wow, you had someone like that?
**[14:04] shi**
And so in the eleven years
I have been in this club,
**[14:07] shi**
I have never once participated
in a tournament.
**[14:10] yu**
Eleven years?!
**[14:11] yu**
How old are you now, President?
**[14:14] shi**
Twenty-six.
**[14:15] yu**
Twenty-six?!
**[14:18] shi**
There are things you can only do
during your high school years!
**[14:22] shi**
I will not quit Binan High School volleyball
**[14:24] shi**
until I take part in a tournament!
**[14:26] yu**
President!
**[14:27] yu**
You're dedicating your life to it, huh?
**[14:29] yu**
That's amazing!
**[14:30] yu**
I'm a little bit moved!
**[14:32] en**
I can't believe he's 26.
**[14:34] at**
Talk about peaking in high school.
**[14:36] ryu**
Even Neverland would be shocked.
**[14:39] ryu**
I'm surprised the school lets him stay.
**[14:42] io**
The school's probably fine with
it as long as he pays tuition.
**[14:50] shu**
President Munakata...
**[14:51] shu**
you'll regret this!
**[14:53] shu**
I'm a diamond in the rough.
**[14:55] shu**
The more you polish me, the more
I will outshine Hakone Yumoto!
**[15:04] shu**
*Welcome to the VEPP Theater.*
**[15:10] shu**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[15:17] shu**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[15:20] shu**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[15:30] shu**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
blooming in the galaxy!*
**[15:37] shu**
*Moon and sun, miracles and secrets*
**[15:38] both**
The twin stars shining in the heavens!
**[15:40] shu**
*We're the stars making wishes come true!*
**[15:41] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[15:42] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[15:43] shu**
*VEPPer, bringing a thrill
to this blue planet!*
**[15:45] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[15:49] both**
Chosen warrior!
**[15:50] shu**
*Let's illuminate the entire world!*
**[15:51] haru**
Lucky you!
**[15:53] aki**
Happy you!
**[15:53] shu**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[15:56] both**
Shooting...
**[15:57] both**
Star!
**[16:06] mon**
Hey! Look at me!
**[16:09] yu**
What's that?
**[16:10] yu**
A black volleyball?
**[16:12] mon**
I may look black...
**[16:14] mon**
But inside, I'm sparkling and shining!
**[16:17] mon**
And my name...
**[16:19] mon**
is Black Boba-yan Monster!
**[16:21] yu**
Black Boba-yan?
**[16:23] mon**
Look at me more!
**[16:25] mon**
Receive my blackness!
**[16:26] mon**
And polish me more!
**[16:29] yu**
The black ball is coming at me!
**[16:31] shi**
I am Muna! Kata!
**[16:33] mon**
Boba-yan!
**[16:37] shi**
Sky!
**[16:39] en**
I think something went flying.
**[16:41] io**
Looked like Munakata-san.
**[16:43] at**
Yumoto's right.
**[16:44] at**
Lots of things really do come flying
and falling down in autumn.
**[16:48] ryu**
Yeah...
**[16:50] wom**
Everyone, I think it's your turn!
**[16:55] en**
Yumoto, what's with the black ball?
**[16:58] at**
I think it's supposed to be a volleyball.
**[17:01] wom**
Now, everyone! Love Making!
**[17:04] yu**
Love Making!
**[17:32] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[17:35] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[17:38] yu**
Love Making!
**[17:48] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[17:50] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[17:53] yu**
Love Making!
**[18:02] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[18:04] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[18:07] yu**
Love Making!
**[18:17] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[18:19] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[18:22] yu**
Love Making!
**[18:32] ryu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[18:34] ryu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[18:36] en**
This love-filled planet will
not abide those who lack love!
**[18:40] ryu**
Those who wield loveless
power must kneel before love!
**[18:44] io**
Love is power!
**[18:45] io**
Love is hope!
**[18:47] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[18:49] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[18:50] yu**
Love!
**[18:52] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[18:55] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[18:56] yu**
Feel the power...
**[18:58] five**
Of love!
**[19:01] mon**
Black is the color that
absorbs all other colors!
**[19:04] mon**
My black ball will suck
up all of your love power!
**[19:09] yu**
Scarlet Love Lumiere!
**[19:12] en**
Cerulean Love Aqua!
**[19:16] at**
Epinard Love Hurricane!
**[19:19] io**
Sulfur Love Gaia!
**[19:21] ryu**
Vesta Love Ignit!
**[19:27] yu**
What? He sucked in all of our attacks!
**[19:32] mon**
I'm the invincible Black Boba-yan!
**[19:34] mon**
Boing! Boing!
**[19:36] en**
He's bouncing around a lot.
**[19:38] at**
Yeah, I think he's having fun.
**[19:41] mon**
Look!
**[19:42] mon**
Inside this black sphere
shines the greatest of gems,
**[19:45] mon**
even harder than diamond, brighter
than the first star of evening!
**[19:50] yu**
Then why do you hide it?
**[19:55] mon**
Because...
**[19:56] mon**
he wouldn't polish me,
**[19:59] mon**
so I gave up on shining.
**[20:01] yu**
So you can't shine unless
someone else polishes you?
**[20:07] yu**
Instead of relying on someone else,
**[20:09] yu**
you have to make yourself shine!
**[20:10] yu**
Because you're a really
beautiful diamond, right?
**[20:14] mon**
W-Well...
**[20:17] yu**
Don't worry!
**[20:18] yu**
I know you can do it!
**[20:19] yu**
You can shine!
**[20:21] mon**
Even... I can?
**[20:23] yu**
Yeah!
**[20:24] yu**
Now, take this!
**[20:40] yu**
True Love Attack!
**[20:54] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[21:08] yu**
Love is over!
**[21:19] yu**
Boy, am I glad!
**[21:22] yu**
Shuzo-san is back with the volleyball club!
**[21:25] yu**
"Shuzo! I was waiting for
you to pull yourself up!"
**[21:29] yu**
That's what the president
said. He's as on-fire as ever!
**[21:32] en**
In the end, their little lovers'
quarrel was the cause of it all.
**[21:37] at**
Yeah.
**[21:38] at**
It really put us through a lot.
**[21:39] ryu**
But what are you going to do about
the volleyball club, Yumoto?
**[21:42] yu**
I quit!
**[21:44] yu**
After all, I'm in the Earth Defense Club!
**[21:47] wom**
Yes! That's right!
**[21:49] io**
But with Oka Shuzo back, the
club only has two members...
**[21:54] ryu**
Does that mean Munakata won't
graduate this year, either?
**[21:57] yu**
That's right!
**[21:59] yu**
The president and Shuzo-san said
**[22:00] yu**
they would continue their fiery training
until they get into a tournament!
**[22:03] yu**
They're totally fired up!
**[22:05] at**
Never going to graduate, huh?
**[22:09] en**
Two for Neverland, huh?
**[22:14] dada**
Chicken was on sale today,
so I made chicken hot pot.
**[22:18] dada**
Come on, eat up, you two.
**[22:21] dada**
It will warm up your cold hearts.
**[22:24] haru**
Hakone...
**[22:26] aki**
...Yumoto...
**[22:27] both**
We will make you pay!
***SIGN*** Everyone Loves Someone!
***SIGN*** Next time:
**[24:01] ryu**
Next time:
Everyone Loves Someone!
**[24:04] ryu**
Love Making!
**[24:05] ---**
# 6 - Everyone Loves Someone!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] wom**
--
**[00:00] five**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] yu**
--
**[00:11] en**
Man, I give up.
**[00:14] at**
That was kind of surprising.
**[00:16] yu**
Hey. I'm trembling a little right now.
**[00:19] en**
How come?
**[00:20] yu**
Fighting and conflict and
dissidence and animosity...
**[00:23] yu**
It makes me so uncomfortable...
**[00:25] yu**
When I see it, I don't know how to handle it.
**[00:29] at**
Those are a few fairly advanced
words you know, Yumoto.
**[00:32] yu**
Because they make me uncomfortable,
I can remember them even better.
**[00:35] yu**
It's like they're burned
into my brain, I guess.
**[00:38] yu**
It just makes me so uncomfortable.
**[00:40] at**
Well, I'm the same way.
**[00:43] at**
I want to live a life without conflict,
**[00:45] at**
and I want that for the
people around me, too.
**[00:48] en**
You said it.
**[00:49] yu**
Why did this have to happen, huh?
***SIGN*** Everyone Loves Someone!
**[02:31] yu**
It's over! It's over!
**[02:33] yu**
Class is over!
**[02:35] yu**
Senpais, I just learned something!
**[02:38] yu**
Sea slug mating... it's incredible!
**[02:42] yu**
They're hermaphrodites, see...
**[02:45] yu**
They have a sexual organ on
each end of their body...
**[02:49] en**
Tell us more about sea slug mating!
**[02:51] at**
I'd love to hear all about it!
**[02:53] yu**
Um, well,
**[02:54] yu**
sea slugs have both male
and female sexual organs,
**[02:57] yu**
so apparently, they can line up in a block,
**[02:59] yu**
innie to outie and innie to outie...
**[03:02] yu**
But instead of forming a train
like you might be thinking,
**[03:06] yu**
they can actually join up in a big ring...
**[03:09] en**
Wow, that's amazing!
**[03:11] at**
How do you know that?
**[03:13] yu**
Well, I was talking with everyone...
**[03:16] wom**
It's love, of course!
**[03:18] wom**
Love connects people in a giant chain
that goes all the way into space!
**[03:22] yu**
Wow!
**[03:23] yu**
That's huge!
**[03:26] yu**
Um... Io-senpai?
**[03:28] io**
Can I help you?
**[03:30] yu**
And Ryuu-senpai...
**[03:31] ryu**
What do you want?
**[03:33] yu**
What's wrong?
**[03:34] both**
Why do you ask?
**[03:36] yu**
Well... you're acting...
a little different...
**[03:39] io**
Are we?
**[03:41] ryu**
You think?
**[03:42] yu**
Io-senpai, what are your
thoughts on hermaphroditism?
**[03:45] yu**
Like "Doubling up must improve
their cost performance!"
**[03:47] yu**
"What economic efficiency!" Or something.
**[03:49] ryu**
Yeah, that's true.
**[03:51] ryu**
You could run a calculation like
that in a split second, right?
**[03:55] io**
What is that supposed to mean?
**[03:56] ryu**
Nothing.
**[03:58] ryu**
I'm not saying
**[03:59] ryu**
"For someone so good at calculations,
your bank balance has been slipping lately;
**[04:01] ryu**
I hope you're okay," or anything like that.
**[04:04] io**
Yes, because a little
ebb and flow is natural.
**[04:06] io**
But yeah, sea slugs are impressive.
**[04:09] io**
They could have a date or a fling with
anyone they meet anywhere, like someone else I know.
**[04:12] ryu**
Are you saying I'm a sea slug?
**[04:15] io**
Sea slugs are cute.
**[04:18] yu**
Cows are cute, too!
**[04:20] yu**
I like brown cows!
**[04:22] yu**
A lot more than the black and white kind.
**[04:24] yu**
For some reason, I just like brown better!
**[04:29] yu**
Although I like pandas because
they're black and white...
**[04:32] yu**
I guess I'd be disappointed if
they were just brown all over.
**[04:35] yu**
I wonder why that is?
**[04:37] at**
Because then they'd be ordinary bears.
**[04:39] en**
It's a little early, but I'm going
to head for the Kurotama Bath.
**[04:44] en**
Atsushi, you come with me.
**[04:46] en**
You too, Yumoto.
**[04:47] yu**
O-Okay.
**[04:49] en**
Anyone else in?
**[04:51] en**
No?
**[04:53] en**
If not, let's head out.
**[05:01] wom**
Excuse me!
**[05:02] wom**
* This is a threat to the continued*
* existence of the Battle Lovers!*
**[05:06] wom**
*I must do something to break the deadlock!*
**[05:09] wom**
*I call it Operation: Restoration of Love!*
**[05:13] ryu**
Oh, right.
**[05:14] ryu**
Wom-chan, want some candy?
**[05:17] wom**
Thank you very much!
**[05:21] io**
Wom-san prefers spinach, I believe.
**[05:24] io**
I thought he hated sweets.
**[05:28] ryu**
That's not why he took it.
**[05:31] ryu**
Wom-san won't turn down anybody
who's trying to be nice.
**[05:36] io**
Because he never lets anyone turn him down
when he's trying to be nice?
**[05:41] ryu**
I guess you can't get rich
unless you assume the worst of everybody.
**[05:48] yu**
That's probably what's going on,
and Wom-san's having a hard time,
**[05:50] yu**
being left in the middle like that.
**[05:53] at**
He could have just come with us.
**[05:55] en**
Wom-san's the kind of guy
who would stay, though.
**[05:57] at**
Yeah, since leaving them alone together
**[05:59] at**
feels like it would bring things to a head.
**[06:02] yu**
What do you mean, "bring them to a head"?
**[06:04] yu**
That's not what I want!
**[06:06] at**
But it's not like those two had
anything in common to begin with.
**[06:10] en**
Yeah.
**[06:11] en**
They're a miraculous pair.
**[06:14] en**
It's a miracle they can be in the same room.
**[06:16] at**
Apparently they both had an awful
first impression of each other, too.
***SIGN*** Class 1-A
**[06:20] (Flashback) ryu**
Going Dutch?
**[06:22] (Flashback) ryu**
No way.
**[06:23] (Flashback) ryu**
The guy should pay.
**[06:24] (Flashback) A**
How come?
**[06:26] (Flashback) A**
Women's lib, man.
**[06:28] (Flashback) ryu**
That gender theory stuff
doesn't matter on a date.
**[06:31] (Flashback) ryu**
How do you let a girl know you like her?
**[06:34] (Flashback) ryu**
With words?
**[06:35] (Flashback) ryu**
With actions?
**[06:36] (Flashback) ryu**
Or with telepathy?
**[06:38] (Flashback) ryu**
That one's nice if you can
do it, but most people can't.
**[06:42] (Flashback) ryu**
So the simplest way is to just
say "I'll pay for the date."
**[06:48] (Flashback) ryu**
There's no girl who won't like
having you pick up her cup of tea,
**[06:52] (Flashback) ryu**
and it's a small price to pay to
let her know you like her, right?
**[06:55] (Flashback) kids**
Y-Yeah!
**[06:57] (Flashback) ryu**
Well, my girlfriend never lets me pay, though.
**[07:01] (Flashback) ryu**
See, this is what we call
a benefit-cost ratio.
**[07:05] (Flashback) io**
Sorry.
**[07:07] (Flashback) ryu**
Is something I said amusing to you?
**[07:11] (Flashback) io**
Not really.
**[07:12] (Flashback) io**
It was just funny to hear someone talk
**[07:15] (Flashback) io**
about benefit-cost ratios over
something as silly as dating.
**[07:18] (Flashback) ryu**
If you ask me, obsessing
over money is much sillier.
**[07:22] (Flashback) io**
Oh, you've taken the time to learn who I am?
**[07:25] (Flashback) io**
I'm not an investment, you know.
There are better uses of your time.
**[07:28] (Flashback) ryu**
No, I just know you because you're so annoying.
**[07:32] yu**
So why did they both join the Defense Club?
**[07:36] en**
Well...
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[07:43] (Flashback) both**
Yes?
**[07:45] (Flashback) io**
Is this the Earth Defense Club?
**[07:45] (Flashback) ryu**
*Is this Earth Defense Club thing for real?*
**[07:48] (Flashback) en**
Y-Yeah...
**[07:49] (Flashback) at**
Yes...
**[07:55] at**
I was just happy to have a new member...
**[07:58] yu**
So you accepted them both?
**[08:00] yu**
Separately?
**[08:01] en**
Well, we didn't know they hated each other.
**[08:07] (Flashback) io**
Well, well.
**[08:11] (Flashback) io**
Would you please stop getting in my face?
**[08:14] (Flashback) ryu**
You're the one getting in my face!
**[08:17] (Flashback) io**
I heard overly persistent
men never get dates!
**[08:20] (Flashback) ryu**
That's right, it's important
to know when to quit!
**[08:23] (Flashback) ryu**
The Defense Club is perfect for
skipping class and napping.
**[08:25] (Flashback) ryu**
Don't get in my way!
**[08:27] (Flashback) io**
Sometimes I want to look at the
markets in peace and quiet, too!
**[08:30] (Flashback) io**
Why don't *you* quit instead?
**[08:32] (Flashback) both**
I want to join the club!
**[08:35] yu**
So what happened then?
**[08:37] en**
Well, we couldn't not let them join the club.
**[08:40] at**
Although the club itself hadn't
been registered at that point...
**[08:45] (Flashback) ryu**
This new series is so funny!
**[08:47] (Flashback) io**
As I thought, biotech
stocks are on the rise.
**[08:50] (Flashback) io**
I'll have to check the price
movements in the future.
**[08:55] (Flashback) en**
Hey, Atsushi...
**[08:57] (Flashback) at**
En-chan...
**[08:59] (Flashback) ryu**
You heading home?
**[09:01] (Flashback) io**
I'll accompany you.
**[09:02] (Flashback) ryu**
How come?
**[09:04] (Flashback) io**
What do you mean, how come?
**[09:06] (Flashback) ryu**
What do you mean, what do I mean, how come?
**[09:08] (Flashback) io**
What do you mean, what do I mean,
what do you mean, how come?
**[09:12] (Flashback) en**
It's okay. You don't have
to go out of your way.
**[09:14] (Flashback) at**
You two just do what you want.
**[09:16] (Flashback) io**
No, I was thinking of going myself...
**[09:19] (Flashback) ryu**
It seems like it would be fun to go together.
**[09:22] (Flashback) ryu**
Well, together, minus one.
**[09:25] (Flashback) en**
Look, you guys both hate each other, right?
**[09:29] (Flashback) ryu**
Yes, we do.
**[09:30] (Flashback) io**
Even worse than hate, I would say.
**[09:33] (Flashback) ryu**
There he goes, nitpicking.
**[09:34] (Flashback) io**
And you just want to agree
with everything he says.
**[09:38] (Flashback) at**
Are you sure it doesn't wrap back
around to you liking each other?
**[09:42] (Flashback) both**
No!
**[09:44] (Flashback) both**
I mean—
**[09:45] (Flashback) en**
See, you're a perfect match.
**[09:47] (Flashback) ryu**
Yeah, right!
**[09:47] (Flashback) io**
*You're mistaken!*
***SIGN*** Investigation: Zaou Ryuu
**[09:54] haru**
Why is this happening?
***SIGN*** Investigation: Naruko Io
**[09:55] haru**
That trash!
**[09:57] aki**
It's hard to understand the
reasoning of commoners and trash.
**[10:00] kuma**
Haru-sama. Aki-sama.
**[10:03] kuma**
Bamboo tea.
**[10:05] aki**
Oh, bamboo tea.
**[10:06] ---**
Thank you.
**[10:07] aki**
I'm surprised an Ape would make something
as fashionable as bamboo tea.
**[10:11] kuma**
O-Of course, yes, please call me an ape.
**[10:14] kuma**
Just, um... um...
**[10:17] haru**
What is it?
**[10:18] kuma**
How...
**[10:19] kuma**
How does it feel to be an idol?
**[10:22] haru**
What do you mean by that?
***SIGN*** Kumano Kuroshiro
**[10:24] kuma**
I was just wondering what it must be like,
**[10:27] kuma**
to be loved and admired by everyone...
**[10:31] kuma**
I'm sorry!
**[10:32] kuma**
It's not that I'm jealous of
you or anything like that!
**[10:34] kuma**
I've never, ever felt something
so inappropriate...
**[10:39] kuma**
Well, maybe once, twice... 23 times...
**[10:45] haru**
What?
**[10:46] aki**
Then why not be one?
**[10:54] shu**
*Welcome to the VEPP Theater.*
**[11:00] shu**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[11:07] shu**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[11:10] shu**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[11:20] shu**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
blooming in the galaxy!*
**[11:27] shu**
*Moon and sun, miracles and secrets*
**[11:29] both**
The twin stars shining in the heavens!
**[11:30] shu**
*We're the stars making wishes come true!*
**[11:31] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[11:33] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[11:33] shu**
*VEPPer, bringing a thrill
to this blue planet!*
**[11:36] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[11:39] both**
Chosen warrior!
**[11:40] shu**
*Let's illuminate the entire world!*
**[11:41] haru**
Lucky you!
**[11:43] aki**
Happy you!
**[11:43] shu**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[11:46] both**
Shooting...
**[11:47] both**
Star!
**[11:55] yu**
The True Lovracelets...
**[11:58] en**
A monster, at a time like this?
**[12:00] at**
You think those two will even come?
**[12:02] en**
Even if they do, they can't fight together
when they're bickering like that.
**[12:07] yu**
We'll just have to make do
with the three of us, then!
**[12:10] yu**
Let's Love Making!
**[12:13] yu**
Love Making!
**[12:18] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[12:21] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[12:23] yu**
The Flashing Prince!
**[12:25] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[12:28] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[12:30] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[12:33] yu**
Feel the power...
**[12:35] five**
Of love!
**[12:38] [Messenger] sign**
The Thrilling Prince
Battle Lover Vesta
Finishing Move: Vesta Love Ignit
**[12:49] all**
So cute!
**[12:56] pan**
*I'm Panda Monster.*
**[12:58] pan**
* But although I'm a monster, my*
* ultimate move is "cuteness."*
**[13:01] pan**
*No one can oppose my cuteness.*
**[13:08] all**
So cute!
**[13:10] pan**
Bamboo...
**[13:13] all**
So cute!
**[13:16] guy**
It pooped!
**[13:17] all**
So cute!
**[13:19] yu**
Don't be fooled!
**[13:24] yu**
If you think we'll let you do anything
because you're cute, you've got another thing coming!
**[13:28] pan**
There they are.
**[13:29] pan**
People jealous of my cuteness.
**[13:32] pan**
But I've already prepared for the
appearance of cowards like you!
**[13:36] guy**
Don't be mean to the panda!
**[13:41] en**
What?
**[13:42] en**
Is this the cliche yet exciting twist
where the townspeople turn on the heroes?
**[13:46] at**
Are they really going to bring that out
for a pooping panda?
**[13:50] pan**
You can't recover from the two-fold shock!
**[13:52] yu**
You're one to talk!
**[13:54] yu**
All you do is poop!
**[13:56] yu**
That's perverted!
**[13:57] pan**
Sh-Shut up!
**[13:58] pan**
My poo is made from bamboo,
so it doesn't stink!
**[14:01] pan**
Take this!
**[14:03] pan**
Poo Bomb!
**[14:09] en**
Oh, come on!
**[14:10] en**
That's way too straightforward!
**[14:11] at**
Yet we've never faced such
a dangerous technique!
**[14:14] en**
Cerulean Love Aqua!
**[14:17] at**
Epinard Love Hurricane!
**[14:20] yu**
Scarlet Love Lumiere!
**[14:31] pan**
The praise of others makes me stronger.
**[14:34] pan**
And jealousy and resentment make me bigger!
**[14:43] both**
Yumoto!
**[14:44] en**
You're not all that just
because you're a panda!
**[14:47] at**
Some people do prefer polar bears, you know!
**[14:50] yu**
It's no use, Senpai!
**[14:52] yu**
He's that annoying type that will
**[14:56] yu**
interpret anything you say as jealousy!
**[14:59] pan**
You're the annoying ones here!
**[15:02] pan**
Take this!
**[15:03] pan**
Bamboo Storm!
**[15:19] pan**
Did you know that pandas
**[15:21] pan**
sometimes eat mice and other small mammals?
**[15:25] pan**
You three are like mice to me!
**[15:29] pan**
Do you understand what I'm getting at?
**[15:32] ryu**
Like hell!
**[15:37] ryu**
Stop saying stuff we need
to figure out, poo-face!
**[15:40] io**
There's no need to understand, anyway!
**[15:42] ryu**
Vesta Love Ignit!
**[15:46] io**
Sulfur Love Gaia!
**[15:52] pan**
Wh-What is this?
**[15:54] pan**
This isn't jealousy or resentment!
**[15:56] ryu**
We just don't give a damn about you!
**[15:59] io**
Although you do need to pay for having the
nerve to stand against the Battle Lovers.
**[16:03] ryu**
Io, you're more aggressive than I thought.
**[16:06] io**
You're one to talk, Ryuu.
**[16:08] en**
Did you two make up?
**[16:11] ryu**
Huh?
**[16:12] io**
Certainly not!
**[16:16] at**
Then what are you doing here?
**[16:19] both**
They're unrelated incidents!
**[16:24] pan**
To hit a cute panda...
**[16:27] pan**
you call yourselves human?!
**[16:29] ryu**
You're not even a panda.
**[16:31] ryu**
You're a panda monster, y'know?
**[16:33] io**
Just being cute isn't enough!
**[16:35] io**
Running a business means
solving your own problems,
**[16:38] io**
and you must always strive for
innovation and change!
**[16:41] ryu**
The road to popularity is a thorny
path that requires constant hard work!
**[16:44] ryu**
Are you prepared to walk that road?!
**[16:47] yu**
Senpais, it's time!
**[16:49] yu**
Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
**[16:54] en**
Flash, Purifying Aqua!
**[16:57] atsu**
Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
**[17:01] io**
Roar, Raging Gaia!
**[17:04] ryu**
Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
**[17:11] yu**
Io-Ryuu-senpai, it's up to you!
**[17:15] ryu**
Shall we?
**[17:16] io**
Yeah!
**[17:17] both**
Don't wallow in love!
**[17:19] both**
True Love Attack!
**[17:32] both**
True Love Fountain!
**[17:49] both**
Love is over!
**[17:50] aki**
Don't wallow in love, eh?
**[17:54] haru**
You're one to talk.
**[17:55] yu**
You two!
**[17:56] all**
VEPPer!
**[17:58] haru**
The likes of you
**[18:00] haru**
could never understand the thought
process of someone who is loved.
**[18:02] aki**
You lack any qualification
to speak on the matter.
**[18:06] aki**
In short, you're insufficient.
**[18:08] yu**
Huh?
**[18:09] yu**
What do you mean?
**[18:10] haru**
It's not you, the Battle Lovers,
**[18:12] haru**
who are worthy of the love of thousands.
**[18:14] aki**
You'll see that that love is
reserved for us, VEPPer.
**[18:18] aki**
Little by little.
**[18:21] yu**
What was all that, about
being worthy of love?
**[18:24] en**
I'm getting the feeling they
don't like us very much.
**[18:29] en**
Can't put my finger on it.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[18:39] at**
Yumoto's engaged in repetitive behavior.
**[18:42] at**
Like a stressed wolf at the zoo.
**[18:47] en**
Come on, Ryuu, Io.
**[18:48] en**
Get a grip already.
**[18:50] io**
I'm sorry, Yufuin-senpai.
**[18:52] io**
I'm a very petty person.
**[18:54] ryu**
I know I'm worse than Io.
**[18:58] ryu**
I'm an idiot who only thinks
about getting with girls.
**[19:00] io**
What are you talking about?
**[19:02] io**
Your dating habits stimulate the economy.
**[19:05] io**
It's worthy of praise.
**[19:08] ryu**
Your investments are way more amazing.
**[19:10] ryu**
You're committed to the
development of your business.
**[19:13] ryu**
My little dates are nothing compared to that.
**[19:17] io**
No, in the end, the economy
comes down to people.
**[19:20] io**
The economy can't function if
people don't go about their lives.
**[19:23] io**
That's what you're doing.
**[19:27] ryu**
You're much more amazing!
**[19:28] ryu**
Acknowledge it already!
**[19:29] io**
I will not!
**[19:30] io**
Ryuu, you should have confidence instead!
**[19:33] ryu**
Shut up, you genius!
**[19:35] io**
Give it a rest already, you icon!
**[19:37] wom**
Wait a minute!
**[19:39] en**
What?
**[19:40] en**
Are those backhanded compliments?
**[19:42] en**
Or do you actually both think
the world of each other?
**[19:44] both**
Yes, I do!
**[19:46] ryu**
It's just that he...
**[19:47] io**
You...
**[19:48] both**
...won't admit it!
**[19:51] yu**
Oh, I have a question!
**[19:53] yu**
How did this start?
**[19:55] both**
Because the other boys in
class were making fun of him!
**[19:59] ryu**
That's why I was explaining
how amazing Io was!
**[20:02] io**
I explained it to them, kindly and concisely!
**[20:06] ryu**
But Io overheard it and denied it!
**[20:08] io**
Because I lack even 1/10th of your value!
**[20:11] ryu**
But I told you!
**[20:13] ryu**
You're amazing!
**[20:14] ryu**
Why won't you acknowledge it?
**[20:15] io**
I'm not amazing!
**[20:17] (Flashback) ryu**
Amazing! Amazing! Amazing!
**[20:17] io**
What's so amazing about me?!
**[20:19] en**
This is freaking dumb!!!
**[20:23] at**
I just remembered.
**[20:24] at**
When you came to the Kurotama
Bath for the first time,
**[20:27] at**
it was just like this.
**[20:29] (Flashback) ryu**
Yeah, right!
**[20:29] (Flashback) io**
You're mistaken!
**[20:33] (Flashback) io**
This is the worst.
**[20:33] (Flashback) ryu**
This stinks.
**[20:35] (Flashback) gora**
Excuse me, sirs.
**[20:37] (Flashback) gora**
We can dry your uniforms quickly.
**[20:39] (Flashback) gora**
In the meantime, please, get in the bath.
**[20:46] (Flashback) io**
What on Earth?
**[20:48] (Flashback) ryu**
How pushy can you get?
**[20:54] (Flashback) io**
Not bad at all, huh?
**[20:56] (Flashback) ryu**
Yeah, pretty good.
**[20:57] (Flashback) io**
I guess we can agree on some things.
**[21:00] (Flashback) ryu**
I'm pretty shocked, too.
**[21:02] (Flashback) en**
Well, I guess they're both in the club.
**[21:06] (Flashback) at**
Are you okay with that?
**[21:07] (Flashback) both**
Yeah!
**[21:09] en**
In retrospect, I'm grateful
for that splash of water.
**[21:12] at**
Without that, they might have
never spoken to each other again.
**[21:17] wom**
What's wrong?
**[21:19] yu**
I'm sorry!
**[21:20] yu**
The one who splashed you was probably me!
**[21:28] (Flashback) yu**
The ridge tiles on a bathhouse are
guardian spirits against fire!
**[21:31] (Flashback) yu**
Thanks for all your help!
**[21:34] (Flashback) yu**
But we're a natural hot spring,
so there's no danger of fire!
**[21:38] (Flashback) yu**
Oh well!
**[21:40] (Flashback) gora**
Yumoto.
**[21:43] (Flashback) gora**
I need you to wash these
and iron them quickly.
**[21:48] (Flashback) yu**
Big bro, are these from Binan High School?
**[21:52] yu**
That's the time you were
talking about, right?
**[21:55] yu**
I think I need to apologize to you both.
**[21:59] ryu**
Huh? What?
**[22:00] io**
We're the ones who should apologize.
**[22:02] io**
For bringing down the mood in the club room.
**[22:04] yu**
Not that!
**[22:06] yu**
Because I was hasty with
the iron, the lining...
**[22:14] yu**
I'm sorry!
**[22:15] ryu**
That was you?!
**[22:16] io**
I always wondered...
**[22:18] wom**
Now, now.
**[22:19] wom**
It means you match me! It's premiere!
**[22:22] both**
I'm not happy about that at all!
**[22:25] wom**
What did you say?!
**[22:27] wom**
Love shock!
***SIGN*** A Christmas of Love and Miracles
***SIGN*** Next Time
**[24:01] yu**
Next time: "A Christmas of
Love and Miracles!"
**[24:04] yu**
Love Making!
**[24:05] ---**
# 7 - A Christmas of Love and Miracles
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] yu**
--
**[00:00] both**
--
**[00:00] both**
--
**[00:00] wom**
--
***SIGN*** Ole! Ramen
***SIGN*** Hijiriya Hitori
***SIGN*** Ole! Ramen
**[00:26] man**
Here's your ramen!
**[00:27] all**
Wow!
**[00:29] ryu**
Looks delicious!
**[00:30] yu**
Let's eat!
**[00:37] wom**
Yes!
**[00:40] en**
Hey, I've been thinking...
**[00:43] at**
Yes?
**[00:44] en**
Christmas Eve is coming.
**[00:46] en**
How about we hold a Chri-pa?
**[00:49] all**
A Chri-pa?!
**[00:51] at**
What's going on?
**[00:52] at**
En-chan, you're usually the one
that hates that stuff the most...
**[00:54] en**
Well, I was thinking it's important
to engage with the 'mas.
**[00:59] yu**
Oh, I get it!
**[01:00] yu**
En-chan-senpai is bursting
with Christmas spirit!
**[01:03] yu**
I'm so in!
**[01:05] yu**
And we'll have the party at
Kurotama Bath, of course!
**[01:07] en**
A Chri-pa with a hot bath, huh?
**[01:09] en**
Okay, let's do it.
**[01:11] yu**
Yeah!
**[01:12] yu**
I'm looking forward to it *so much*!
**[01:15] en**
Now, we just have to figure out the food...
**[01:19] man**
We've got you!
**[01:22] yu**
Ole! Christmas Ramen?
**[01:25] ryu**
Wow...
**[01:26] ryu**
This shop's finally gone down
the Christmas hole too, huh?
**[01:28] io**
Opportunism is a fundamental
part of doing business.
**[01:32] en**
This sounds good to me.
**[01:34] yu**
Got it!
**[01:35] yu**
Mister, we want a Christmas
ramen delivery on Christmas Eve!
**[01:40] yu**
Send it to the Kurotama Bath!
**[01:42] man**
Okay!
**[01:45] sei**
Ole! I'm back.
**[01:47] yu**
Huh? Hijiriya-kun?
**[01:49] hij**
Hey...
**[01:50] yu**
I see!
**[01:51] yu**
Is this where you live?
**[01:53] at**
You know him?
**[01:54] yu**
He's my classmate, Hijiriya-kun!
**[01:57] yu**
Bro Gora!
**[02:00] go**
Oh, welcome back, Yumoto.
**[02:02] yu**
Hey, can we have a Chri-pa
here on Christmas Eve?
**[02:06] go**
A Chri-pa?
**[02:07] yu**
It means "Christmas party"!
**[02:09] yu**
We're going to gather at Kurotama Bath
**[02:11] yu**
and have cake
**[02:12] yu**
and get ramen delivered
**[02:14] yu**
and exchange presents!
**[02:16] yu**
Of course, you're invited too!
**[02:18] yu**
So can we reserve the bath for Christmas Eve?
**[02:21] go**
Me and Christmas cake...
**[02:23] go**
Me and ramen delivery...
**[02:25] go**
Me and exchanging presents...
**[02:28] go**
Yes, you can.
**[02:29] yu**
Yeah!
***SIGN*** A Christmas of Love and Miracles
**[04:09] haru**
It's Christmas, huh?
**[04:11] aki**
Yeah...
**[04:24] (Flashback) haru**
Today's Christmas Eve!
**[04:26] (Flashback) aki**
You think Santa Claus
will bring us a present?
**[04:29] (Flashback) haru**
I doubt it. He never does.
**[04:33] (Flashback) aki**
But don't worry!
**[04:35] (Flashback) aki**
He's our true Santa!
**[04:38] (Flashback) haru**
Yeah, he is!
**[04:40] (Flashback) aki**
We don't need Santa...
**[04:43] both**
We don't need Christmas.
***SIGN*** Ole! Ramen
**[04:51] man**
It's done.
***SIGN*** Merry Christmas
***SIGN*** Ole! Ramen.
**[04:57] hij**
Ole.
**[04:59] hij**
I'm off.
**[05:03] kid**
Wow, lame.
**[05:05] kid**
Hey, keep it down.
**[05:12] haru**
Hey there, Red-Nosed Reindeer.
**[05:14] aki**
The day you fear and hate most
in the whole year has arrived.
**[05:19] both**
Christmas Eve!
**[05:20] hij**
Wh-Who are you two?
**[05:22] haru**
16 years without a girlfriend.
**[05:25] aki**
And no friends who like to throw parties.
**[05:27] haru**
So you spend every Christmas Eve
**[05:29] haru**
doing nothing but delivering
ramen for your father.
**[05:35] haru**
And every year hence, forever and ever...
**[05:38] aki**
Stewing in hatred and resentment
of people happier than you...
**[05:41] both**
That's how you'll spend this day.
**[05:46] aki**
Wouldn't you just love...
**[05:47] haru**
...to get rid of this day?
**[05:50] hij**
I hate Christmas...
**[05:52] hij**
I hate Christmas...
**[05:54] hij**
I wish it would just go away!
**[05:56] haru**
Then why don't we grant...
**[05:58] aki**
...that wish of yours?
**[05:59] hij**
Huh? How?
**[06:08] haru**
Now we just wait for him to do the rest.
**[06:11] aki**
We just have to wait...
**[06:13] both**
...for the moment Christmas dies.
**[06:19] both**
G-Gora-san!
**[06:21] go**
Hello there, neighbors.
**[06:23] go**
Sorry to surprise you from the rooftop.
**[06:25] go**
Yumoto is holding a Christmas party
today, so I'm hanging decorations.
**[06:29] both**
Oh, really?
**[06:31] go**
Well, what about you two?
**[06:34] go**
Would you like to join us?
**[06:40] haru**
*We were invited!*
**[06:42] aki**
*We were invited!*
**[06:44] haru**
*We were invited!*
**[06:45] aki**
*We were invited!*
**[06:47] haru**
*We were invited!*
**[06:49] aki**
*We were invited!*
**[06:51] aki**
*What to do?*
**[06:52] haru**
*What to do?*
**[06:53] aki**
*What to do?*
**[06:53] haru**
*What to do?*
**[06:55] both**
*Invited by the Santa Claus we've longed for!*
**[07:01] dada**
Come along and have dinner!
**[07:04] dada**
I finished the Christmas gyoza!
**[07:07] haru**
Sorry, Dadacha.
**[07:10] haru**
We're going...
**[07:11] aki**
...to the Chri-pa across the way!
**[07:14] both**
Later!
**[07:16] dada**
Wait!
**[07:17] dada**
What about the monster?
**[07:22] both**
That's right!
**[07:24] both**
What do we do?!
**[07:25] haru**
After we finally got invited...
**[07:27] aki**
After we finally get to join the ranks
of people satisfied living in reality...
**[07:30] haru**
At this rate, Christmas...
**[07:32] aki**
And all people living in
reality across the world...
**[07:34] both**
...are going to be destroyed!
**[07:36] dada**
That's right! So—
**[07:38] haru**
Hey, Dadacha!
**[07:40] haru**
Where's that monster right now?
**[07:42] aki**
Find him!
**[07:42] haru**
And tell him!
**[07:44] haru**
The plot...
**[07:45] aki**
...to destroy Christmas
all across the world...
**[07:47] both**
...is off!
**[07:51] en**
Well, I think everything's in order.
**[07:53] en**
Let's have a toast.
**[07:55] yu**
Okay!
**[07:56] wom**
By the way, today we're having
"Having a Christmas Toast With You
**[08:00] wom**
Love Shower Drink."
**[08:03] ryu**
What's with that oh-so-conspicuous
introduction?
**[08:06] wom**
This is what we always
toast with at celebrations
**[08:09] wom**
on *#^$, where I was born.''
**[08:12] both**
Excuse us!
**[08:14] ryu**
Huh?
**[08:15] ryu**
Who could that be?
**[08:16] at**
Were you selling tickets to the party?
**[08:18] io**
No!
**[08:20] both**
Hello there!
**[08:21] en**
Oh, you two.
**[08:23] io**
The Beppu Brothers?
**[08:24] yu**
It is!
**[08:25] yu**
It's Brothers-senpai!
**[08:27] ryu**
What are you doing here?
**[08:28] go**
Oh, well, I...
**[08:30] haru**
Oh, Gora-san!
**[08:31] haru**
Thank you very much...
**[08:33] both**
...for inviting us!
**[08:35] en**
What are super idols doing
here on Christmas Eve?
**[08:38] io**
It is curious.
**[08:40] io**
You'd think they would have had other plans.
**[08:43] ryu**
You can't invite the Beppus just like that.
**[08:46] ryu**
They're serious idols at our school.
**[08:49] ryu**
For now.
**[08:50] both**
For now?!
**[08:51] gora**
I'm sorry, I didn't realize...
**[08:54] haru**
Oh, don't worry about it!
**[08:56] aki**
We did have plans, but...
**[08:58] both**
We canceled them!
**[09:01] en**
So you say. But I bet you really
had nothing better to do.
**[09:05] yu**
So, Brothers-senpai!
**[09:07] yu**
Why don't you join us in a toast
with our Love Shower Drink?
**[09:11] go**
Here!
**[09:12] both**
Yes! Thank you!
**[09:14] yu**
Well, Brothers-senpai!
**[09:16] yu**
Please sit here!
**[09:19] go**
Have a seat here.
**[09:20] both**
Thank you!
**[09:24] en**
Good thing I printed a
few extra just in case.
**[09:27] en**
Here, you can have some.
**[09:29] haru**
Chri-pa...
**[09:31] aki**
...schedule?
**[09:33] en**
Okay, let's get started.
**[09:35] en**
Merry...
**[09:36] all**
Christmas!
**[09:38] yu**
Brothers-senpai, thank you for joining us!
**[09:41] yu**
Cheers!
**[09:45] both**
Gora-san! Cheers!
**[09:47] gora**
Yeah, cheers!
**[09:49] yu**
Huh?
**[09:55] yu**
The cake and the Love Shower
Drink are both super delicious!
**[09:58] gora**
Oh, Yumoto.
**[10:00] gora**
You got some cream on you.
**[10:02] yu**
Oh, bro!
**[10:03] yu**
Thank you!
**[10:10] ryu**
Hey, Beppu-kuns.
**[10:12] ryu**
You got cream on you.
**[10:15] ryu**
What?
**[10:16] ryu**
Did I do something wrong?
**[10:17] yu**
Brothers-senpai, feel
free to eat all you like!
**[10:21] go**
Here you are.
**[10:23] both**
Yes!
**[10:24] both**
Thank you!
**[10:27] en**
Speaking of eating, where's
the Christmas ramen?
**[10:29] io**
We ordered it for 7:00...
**[10:33] haru**
I hope Dadacha's handling it...
**[10:36] aki**
Don't worry.
**[10:37] aki**
Nothing will happen.
**[10:38] haru**
We can't let it happen...
**[10:40] both**
At least, not until we get his present!
***SIGN*** Galaxy Idols VEPPer Most popular songs: You Are a Distant First-Magnitude Star *Star*The*VEPPer*
**[10:49] yu**
Senpai, if the ramen's not coming,
we should exchange presents first!
**[10:54] yu**
I can't wait!
**[10:56] aki**
What a great idea!
**[10:58] haru**
Let's do it!
**[11:00] en**
Guess we'll have to.
**[11:02] en**
Swapping ramen smile time and
present exchange time, huh?
**[11:07] ryu**
But exchanging presents
**[11:10] ryu**
is the highlight of the Chri-pa.
**[11:12] ryu**
You gotta save the best
part for the end, right?
**[11:16] en**
He's right.
**[11:18] en**
Well, let's swap it with the
Christmas song sing-a-long instead.
**[11:22] ryu**
Yeah! Good idea!
**[11:24] yu**
Okay...
**[11:35] haru**
No good?
**[11:37] haru**
Monster...
**[11:39] haru**
is coming to town?
**[11:44] go**
Is something wrong?
**[11:47] haru**
R-Rather than the sing-a-long...
**[11:49] aki**
I think Yumoto-kun's right...
**[11:51] both**
We should exchange presents first!
**[11:55] both**
Now, quickly!
**[11:56] both**
Before he comes!
**[11:58] at**
Who?
**[11:59] both**
Oh... nothing...
**[12:01] en**
We don't have a choice.
**[12:03] en**
If they want it that badly, maybe
doing that first will calm them down.
**[12:06] yu**
All right!
**[12:07] both**
Yes!
**[12:09] at**
There's something strange about those two.
**[12:12] io**
I wonder if Christmas
makes them a little crazy.
**[12:18] en**
Okay, let's get started.
**[12:20] yu**
I'm so excited!
**[12:22] both**
*The only present we want...*
**[12:24] both**
*is that one!*
**[12:26] tawa**
Well, then. Christmas present exchange.
**[12:29] tawa**
Let's start the music.
**[12:33] yu**
Th-That sound...
**[12:36] all**
Now?!
**[12:38] rein**
Even on Christmas Eve, we labor and toil.
**[12:41] rein**
I come on behalf of all those
forced to work without rest...
**[12:44] rein**
Ole!
**[12:45] rein**
I am Red-Nosed Reindeer Monster!
**[12:49] yu**
Reindeer Monster?
**[12:50] ryu**
What's he doing here now?
**[12:56] en**
Hey, what do we do?
**[12:58] ryu**
We definitely can't transform here...
**[13:01] at**
I wish these monsters could
time their appearances better.
**[13:04] yu**
Seriously!
**[13:05] io**
What do we do?
**[13:07] wom**
Since there are people here right now,
**[13:09] wom**
you'll just have to transform outside.
**[13:12] rein**
Hey!
**[13:14] rein**
Are you guys ignoring me?
**[13:17] go**
It really is a reindeer!
**[13:22] rein**
Huh?
**[13:24] go**
Here, have some.
**[13:27] rein**
Oh...
**[13:28] rein**
Thanks?
**[13:29] haru**
Oh, dear...
**[13:30] haru**
What do we do?
**[13:31] aki**
There's only one thing *to* do.
**[13:34] both**
We'll have to let them beat him!
**[13:37] at**
But how do we get out of here?
**[13:40] yu**
We could all say we gotta pee!
**[13:42] en**
It would seem unnatural for us
all to do that at the same time.
**[13:45] ryu**
What about brushing our teeth, then?
**[13:47] io**
Even more unnatural!
**[13:48] haru**
That's it!
**[13:50] haru**
You all just had cake...
**[13:53] aki**
So why don't you go over there...
**[13:54] both**
...and brush your teeth?
**[13:56] yu**
Huh?
**[13:57] yu**
That might let us all brush our
teeth in the most natural way!
**[14:00] wom**
Then take the invitation
and get going already!
**[14:03] mon**
Hold on a minute!
**[14:05] mon**
You want to shove all the work
on me and run off, do you?
**[14:10] mon**
I won't let you have all the fun
on Christmas Eve without me!
**[14:15] yu**
No, it's not like that!
**[14:16] mon**
Oh, yes it is!
**[14:19] mon**
Stupid Christmas Eve!
**[14:21] mon**
Stupid Christmas parties!
**[14:23] mon**
You get to have fun toasts and
eat cake and exchange presents...
**[14:27] mon**
and gaze at each other
in a nice restaurant
**[14:29] mon**
with a beautiful night view and
a champagne glass in one hand...
**[14:32] mon**
Then you flash the girl your hotel room keys
**[14:35] mon**
and say "I got us a room"
**[14:37] mon**
and then go up in the elevator together
**[14:40] mon**
and then... and then...
**[14:42] mon**
So lucky!!
**[14:44] en**
What is that reindeer talking about?
**[14:47] at**
No idea.
**[14:48] io**
Well, it's a reindeer-eat-reindeer
world out there.
**[14:51] io**
He probably has a lot of troubles.
**[14:53] at**
Wait, are reindeer carnivores or herbivores?
**[14:56] mon**
We're omnivores with a
strong herbivorous bent!
**[14:59] mon**
But that's not the point!
**[15:00] mon**
I'm trying to tell you that
**[15:02] mon**
while you're happily
enjoying yourselves here,
**[15:04] mon**
there are people out there working
their antlers off! You hear me?
**[15:07] mon**
On Christmas, all the
reindeer in the world...
**[15:11] go**
Yes!
**[15:12] go**
The reindeer bring presents
to people all over the world!
**[15:15] go**
You truly do magnificent work.
**[15:18] go**
Want another drink?
**[15:21] go**
I'll bring it to you.
**[15:23] mon**
Well, don't trouble yourself...
**[15:30] haru**
I know!
**[15:31] haru**
Why don't we close our eyes for no reason?
**[15:35] aki**
What a good idea!
**[15:38] en**
Huh?
**[15:39] en**
Those guys just started
meditating or something...
**[15:43] at**
That's weird.
**[15:44] yu**
But that gives us our chance to transform!
**[15:47] sign**
That's right!
**[15:47] wom**
That's right!
***SIGN*** Time to Love Making!!
**[15:48] wom**
Time to Love Making!
**[15:52] yu**
Love Making!
**[15:55] mon**
Hey, you twins!
**[15:57] mon**
Are you trying to close your eyes to the
fact that I'm working on Christmas Eve?
**[16:03] yu**
Oh...
**[16:04] wom**
Drat.
**[16:05] wom**
We almost had it!
**[16:07] go**
I'm sorry for the wait.
**[16:09] go**
Take one.
**[16:09] mon**
Th-Thanks...
**[16:11] haru**
Darn it.
**[16:13] haru**
We managed to create our
most annoying monster yet.
**[16:16] aki**
But unless the Defense Club beats him...
**[16:20] both**
We won't be able to exchange presents!
**[16:23] yu**
Oh, what's with this feeling
of unrealized anticipation?!
**[16:25] yu**
I wanna exchange presents already!
**[16:27] io**
Then we need to defeat the monster first!
**[16:31] wom**
Let's brainstorm ideas for how
you can leave and transform!
**[16:35] ryu**
I know.
**[16:36] ryu**
What if one of us pretends
to have stomach pain,
**[16:38] ryu**
and the others take him to the hospital?
**[16:41] yu**
Great idea! I'll play the sick one.
**[16:44] en**
But I doubt the twins will buy it...
**[16:47] wom**
We'll just have to try it!
**[16:50] wom**
Action, I say!
**[16:52] yu**
Oh, how awful!
**[16:55] yu**
It hurts!
**[16:56] yu**
My stomach does hurt so much!
**[16:59] ryu**
Yumoto!!!
**[17:00] ryu**
Are you okay?!?
**[17:02] haru**
What is this?
**[17:03] haru**
Yumoto-kun, your stomach hurts, you say?
**[17:06] aki**
That is truly awful!
**[17:08] both**
You must take him to the
hospital immediately!
**[17:10] en**
They bought it?
**[17:12] at**
Are you kidding me?
**[17:12] both**
Come on, everyone!
**[17:14] both**
This way!
**[17:15] go**
Wait, Yumoto!
**[17:17] go**
I made your big brother's
special tummy tonic.
**[17:21] yu**
I know, but I need to go to the hospital...
**[17:24] go**
Yumoto.
**[17:25] go**
Ah!
**[17:27] yu**
Ah...
**[17:30] en**
I wish he'd butt out.
**[17:32] io**
No kidding.
**[17:34] mon**
Hey, you guys!
**[17:36] mon**
What kind of stupid fake
performance was that?
**[17:40] yu**
Well, it's all your fault, Mr. Reindeer!
**[17:44] yu**
You're ruining our Chri-pa!
**[17:46] both**
That's right!
**[17:48] haru**
After so long, we got invited to a Chri-pa...
**[17:50] aki**
With that man...
**[17:52] both**
...we've always admired!
**[17:54] aki**
Um, the point is...
**[17:56] haru**
Because of you, a dream we've
held since childhood...
**[17:59] both**
Is down the drain!
**[18:01] mon**
H-How could you...
**[18:03] mon**
You're telling me all you care about
is whether *you* get to have fun?
**[18:08] mon**
Isn't it that selfish attitude
**[18:10] mon**
that has turned Christmas
Eve into the circus it is?
**[18:14] mon**
Listen.
**[18:15] mon**
Your happiness always comes
on the back of someone else.
**[18:15] ryu**
Oh boy, they got him going again.
**[18:19] mon**
Behind all the fun you're having,
**[18:21] mon**
there's always someone working their
fingers to the bone and crying!
**[18:24] mon**
You could never understand the
suffering and sorrow we go through!
**[18:28] all**
Huh?
**[18:29] mon**
And yet no one ever stops to thank you.
**[18:32] mon**
They just complain that you're
late, that the food is cold...
**[18:35] mon**
What do I even do it for?
**[18:38] mon**
You know, I... I...
**[18:41] mon**
I want a Chri-pa, too!
**[18:43] yu**
Then have one!
**[18:45] yu**
You can join us, Mr. Reindeer.
**[18:48] yu**
When things get bad, you
should try to join in the fun!
**[18:52] mon**
I can... join in the fun?
**[18:54] yu**
Yeah.
**[18:55] yu**
You can have a fun Chri-pa with us!
**[18:59] mon**
Me, at a Chri-pa?
**[19:01] mon**
Me, having fun?
**[19:04] gora**
Come along.
**[19:06] both**
So nice!
**[19:09] mon**
Thank you so much!
**[19:12] mon**
Ole!
**[19:12] mon**
I'll enjoy the Chri-pa!
**[19:14] yu**
That's the way!
**[19:19] taw**
It's time for the Chri-pa highlight
you've all been waiting for,
**[19:22] taw**
the present exchange.
**[19:24] yu**
Yeah!
**[19:28] aki**
At last!
**[19:30] haru**
Yes...
**[19:31] taw**
Now, everyone.
**[19:32] taw**
Fetch your presents.
**[19:34] yu**
Right!
**[19:35] taw**
Now, let us begin.
**[19:38] taw**
Start the music!
**[19:52] taw**
Stop.
**[19:57] mon**
Ole!
**[19:58] mon**
My first ever present...
**[20:02] at**
I see.
**[20:04] at**
I get it.
**[20:05] at**
That's why he did it...
**[20:11] en**
That was some Chri-pa.
**[20:14] ryu**
Yeah, it was something.
**[20:16] io**
"Something" may be the
only way to describe it.
**[20:20] yu**
I really had a ton of fun!
**[20:23] yu**
My brother was really happy, too!
**[20:26] en**
By the way, what presents did you get?
**[20:29] io**
I got this from Yumoto.
**[20:31] yu**
Yeah, that's a Wom-san,
made from Wom-san's fur!
**[20:36] ryu**
This is the Christmas ramen that
Reindeer Monster had with him.
**[20:40] ryu**
Though the noodles have gotten soggy
and soaked up all the broth...
**[20:43] en**
I got that.
**[20:45] ryu**
Oh, that's from me!
**[20:47] ryu**
It's a blizzard rose that never wilts!
**[20:49] en**
Hey, anybody want this?
**[20:53] io**
What about you, Kinugawa-senpai?
**[20:56] at**
I got this!
**[20:58] yu**
It's from the student council!
**[20:59] en**
Yeah, they sent it to the
Defense Club yesterday.
**[21:02] io**
Seeing the three of them
dressed up like Santa...
**[21:04] ryu**
They must be having a good time over there.
**[21:08] at**
Looks like it!
**[21:10] io**
By the way, what about the Beppu Brothers?
**[21:13] haru**
This happiness, we must...
**[21:16] aki**
...share it between us.
**[21:18] both**
Because that's what Christmas is all about!
**[21:21] haru**
Yes.
**[21:21] haru**
This is...
**[21:22] aki**
What we've longed for for so long...
**[21:25] both**
Gora-san's warmth!
**[21:27] yu**
I got this!
**[21:29] yu**
It's a hand-knitted sweater
from the Brothers!
**[21:32] yu**
It's nice and warm!
**[21:34] en**
Hand-knitted? That's kind of stalker-ish.
**[21:36] at**
And there's a heart on it...
**[21:38] wom**
By the way, I was so busy playing the music,
**[21:42] wom**
I forgot to join the game!
**[21:45] en**
That's right. What happened to that monster?
**[21:47] ryu**
He got the candy-filled Christmas
stocking from Kinugawa-senpai
**[21:51] ryu**
and left looking really happy.
**[21:53] io**
I don't think we've ever let a monster
get away without turning him back before.
**[21:58] yu**
But I just couldn't bring myself
to attack him like that!
**[22:02] yu**
He was having so much fun!
**[22:04] en**
Well, that's all right.
**[22:06] en**
Everyone's happy.
**[22:08] en**
And it's Christmas Eve.
**[22:09] at**
Yeah.
**[22:11] io**
I guess Christmas really
does make people crazy.
**[22:14] wom**
Yes!
**[22:15] wom**
It's a Christmas Eve miracle!
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love is Like the Snow
**[24:02] en**
Next time: Love is Like the Snow.
**[24:04] en**
Love Making!
**[24:06] ---**
# 8 - Love is Like the Snow
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] mon**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] all**
--
**[00:00] both**
--
**[00:09] en**
I never knew Yumoto's brother made soba.
**[00:13] at**
So he can do more than just chop wood.
**[00:15] yu**
Yeah!
**[00:17] yu**
Today we'll eat Gora's
hand-made New Year's soba,
**[00:20] yu**
then listen to the New Year's bell
**[00:21] yu**
and make our first shrine visit
of the new year together!
**[00:23] yu**
Then we'll watch the first sunrise
**[00:26] yu**
and eat our New Year's feast together...
**[00:29] yu**
I'm looking forward to it so much!
**[00:32] en**
What are you talking about?
**[00:33] en**
Once I'm out of this bath, I'm
eating soba and heading home.
**[00:36] at**
Same here.
**[00:37] yu**
Huh? Senpais, you're just going home?
**[00:40] io**
I'm going, too.
**[00:41] io**
For the New Year, I always visit a shrine
to Benzaiten to pray for my stocks to go up.
**[00:45] ryu**
I'm going to the daruma fair with some girls.
**[00:48] at**
The daruma fair?
**[00:49] ryu**
We were supposed to go snowboarding,
**[00:52] ryu**
but it's so cold it got to be
more trouble than it was worth.
**[00:54] en**
Speaking of which, didn't we have plans
to go skiing during winter break?
**[00:59] io**
Yes.
**[01:00] io**
Though sadly we had to cancel because Yumoto
**[01:03] io**
couldn't save up enough allowance.
**[01:05] yu**
I tried really hard,
**[01:08] yu**
but I just couldn't seem to save it up!
**[01:10] at**
What is your allowance, anyway?
**[01:12] yu**
500 yen per month!
**[01:13] all**
Are you a child?!
***SIGN*** Love is Like the Snow
**[02:57] yu**
Everyone's going home after the soba...
**[02:59] yu**
it's gonna be a lonely New Year...
**[03:01] en**
What's the big deal?
**[03:03] en**
Go on your first shrine visit with Gora.
**[03:05] at**
That's right.
**[03:06] at**
Make it a brother thing.
**[03:07] ryu**
Yeah!
**[03:09] ryu**
Wouldn't that be a nice way
to kick off the year, Yumoto?
**[03:12] yu**
Just me and Gora?
**[03:16] yu**
Yeah, good idea!
**[03:17] yu**
Okay!
**[03:18] yu**
Then after we eat the soba,
**[03:20] yu**
me and my bro will go for
our first shrine visit...
**[03:22] yu**
and watch the first sunrise
of the New Year together!
**[03:24] haru**
What?
**[03:26] haru**
Yumoto doesn't just get to eat
Gora-san's New Year's soba...
**[03:29] aki**
...he gets to spend the first shrine visit
and first sunrise of the New Year alone with him?
**[03:32] haru**
Such an active and marvelous New Year.
**[03:34] haru**
We will...
**[03:35] both**
...never let it happen!
**[03:41] (Flashback) haru**
He doesn't get the day off
off, even on New Year?
**[03:44] (Flashback) aki**
The Andromeda calendar isn't like Japan's.
**[03:49] (Flashback) aki**
Let's watch CIDE and wait, Haru.
***SIGN*** Due to a cosmic storm, your scheduled programming will not be seen today
**[03:52] ann**
Due to a cosmic storm, your scheduled
programming will not be seen today.
**[03:57] ann**
Andromeda Ramen Battle!!
**[03:58] [SONG] sign**
Andromeda Ramen Battle!!
**[04:02] (Flashback) haru**
You're kidding me!
**[04:03] (Flashback) haru**
How can the broadcast be canceled?
**[04:08] dada**
Hey, you two.
**[04:09] dada**
Could you help me get ready
for the mochi-pounding?
**[04:11] dada**
It's really hard doing it alone!
**[04:13] haru**
Dadacha.
**[04:14] haru**
We'll do the mochi-pounding later.
**[04:17] haru**
First, we're going to ruin
their New Year's soba!
**[04:21] haru**
Then we're going to unveil the special New
Year's gift we've been holding in reserve!
***SIGN*** Tomorrow's Weather
**[04:27] man**
* It'll be cold, but clear*
* skies all over Japan.*
**[04:30] yu**
Hey, the Pink Song Battle is about to start!
**[04:35] en**
What are you talking about?
**[04:37] en**
On New Year's Eve,
**[04:39] en**
you have to watch "Classic Japanese
Melodies to End the Year."
**[04:41] ryu**
Huh?
**[04:43] ryu**
Don't you watch the "Don't Get Mad" series?
**[04:46] ryu**
It's ending this year, you know!
***SIGN*** The World Ham Walk
**[04:49] at**
No, on New Year's Eve you're
supposed to put in a DVD!
**[04:52] io**
No, since the markets are closed for the day,
**[04:55] io**
my New Year's tradition is getting
fired up watching martial arts!
**[05:05] wom**
Earth New Year's Eve is filled with
so many different kinds of love!
***SIGN*** Gokaku Cram School
***SIGN*** Jinzou Makoto
**[05:19] kid**
This spring, we'll be in art school!
**[05:21] kid**
We just have to buckle down
for New Year's, that's all.
**[05:23] kid**
We've gotta get into college
on our first try, right?
**[05:32] aki**
Haru.
**[05:33] aki**
I see a good one.
**[05:34] haru**
Yeah.
**[05:40] haru**
Hey, Senpai.
**[05:42] kid**
Senpai?
**[05:43] haru**
Yes, we're students at Binan
High School, just like you.
**[05:48] kid**
Oh... r-really?
**[05:51] aki**
Although we have very little in
common with a 23-year-old senpai
**[05:55] aki**
who's spent five years failing
to get accepted into college.
**[05:59] kid**
H-How did you know that?
**[06:01] haru**
Senpai, really.
**[06:03] haru**
You think "I'm actually a genius
who will change the world"
**[06:08] haru**
or something, don't you?
**[06:10] haru**
Yet they won't acknowledge your
genius, so you just continue failing.
**[06:17] haru**
Even your parents are fed up with you.
**[06:18] haru**
You borrow money to go to cram schools with
no hope of ever paying back your debts.
**[06:23] aki**
And yet you think it's all the fault of the
people refusing to accept you into college.
**[06:29] kid**
Yeah, that's right!
**[06:31] kid**
It's not my fault I've been
rejected for five years!
**[06:34] kid**
The university people just don't
appreciate my shining art talent!
**[06:38] kid**
If I keep failing, my debts
will just keep snowballing...
**[06:42] kid**
I'm never going to escape this winter.
**[06:47] haru**
So, why not show them that shining talent?
**[06:50] aki**
You want to draw
**[06:52] aki**
an incredible picture that will
change the whole world, don't you?
**[07:02] ryu**
We gotta watch Classic Japanese
Melodies for New Year's, huh?
**[07:04] io**
We decided with rock paper
scissors. What can you do?
**[07:07] en**
His vibrato is *the best*.
**[07:12] ryu**
After we eat, I'm going home.
**[07:14] ryu**
Yumoto, when's the soba coming?
**[07:15] yu**
Bro Gora just put it in the
water, so it'll be done soon!
**[07:18] yu**
Is this kotatsu a little cold?
**[07:21] at**
I'm gonna get a chill from the bath.
**[07:22] wom**
Then let's set it to maximum!
**[07:26] io**
The heater doesn't seem to
be working well, either.
**[07:29] ryu**
Here's what I do at times like this!
**[07:31] ryu**
Toasty!
**[07:32] yu**
Hey, that's ours!
**[07:34] yu**
Bro Gora's gonna be so mad!
***SIGN*** Do Not Remove
Kurotama Bath
**[07:36] yu**
It says "Do not remove"!
**[07:39] ryu**
Then how about this?
**[07:42] all**
Toasty!
**[07:44] gora**
Yumoto, it's done.
**[07:46] yu**
Yeah!
**[07:47] gora**
I'll bring the stew by later.
**[07:49] gora**
Eat them before they get soggy, everyone.
**[07:51] all**
Let's eat!
**[07:54] haru**
Here's your first mission...
**[07:56] both**
Snowman Monster!
**[08:11] yu**
What happened?
**[08:12] io**
It seems to be a power outage.
**[08:15] haru**
Hey, the power went out
before we even did anything.
**[08:18] en**
Yumoto, where's the flashlight?
**[08:20] yu**
I'm looking for it!
**[08:22] ryu**
That's my leg!
**[08:24] at**
That's my head!
**[08:25] io**
Really.
**[08:26] io**
This is why you should have a disaster
readiness kit, just in case.
**[08:34] yu**
Hey, it's back on!
**[08:36] yu**
Great!
**[08:37] en**
Not great.
**[08:39] en**
The song is over.
**[08:41] at**
Too bad, huh, En-chan?
**[08:43] io**
Anyway, let's eat our soba before the
power goes out again, then get going.
**[08:49] io**
They're soggy...
**[08:52] aki**
They used that power outage to
take the wind out of our sails!
**[08:55] haru**
Even more unforgivable!
**[08:57] both**
Go, Snowman Monster!
**[09:03] mon**
The land is my canvas!
**[09:05] mon**
I'll paint it in my image!
**[09:15] mon**
My canvas!
**[09:18] man**
*Thank you very much!*
**[09:19] dragon**
*On New Year's, eat mochi, mochi, mochi!*
**[09:20] en**
Okay,
**[09:21] en**
I'd better get going.
**[09:23] en**
Thanks for the meal, Yumoto.
**[09:25] at**
I think I'll head home, too.
**[09:27] yu**
Huh?
**[09:27] yu**
You're really leaving?
**[09:29] io**
It's about time for me, too.
**[09:31] ryu**
And me.
**[09:33] all**
Well, see you!
**[09:35] all**
Have a happy New Year!
**[09:37] en**
Huh?
**[09:39] en**
It won't open!
**[09:42] ryu**
Yumoto.
**[09:43] ryu**
Did you lock the door so we couldn't leave?
**[09:45] yu**
Of course not!
**[09:51] en**
What's with all this snow?
**[09:52] at**
It wasn't coming down at all before...
**[09:55] io**
And the weather forecast said it would
be clear skies all over the country...
**[10:01] aki**
They won't be able to get out.
**[10:03] haru**
Now we'll send them the present
we've been holding onto.
**[10:06] haru**
Snowman Monster, third mission!
**[10:13] io**
Looks like we'll be having
New Year's at Yumoto's house.
**[10:16] at**
Yeah, there's just too much snow.
**[10:20] yu**
Ten seconds to the new year!
**[10:24] yu**
Five!
**[10:25] yu**
Four!
**[10:26] yu**
Three!
**[10:27] yu**
Two!
**[10:28] yu**
One!
**[10:29] yu**
Happy New Year!
**[10:35] snow**
Happy Snow Year!
**[10:37] yu**
A snowman!
**[10:41] mon**
I'm Snowman Monster!
**[10:43] mon**
To celebrate the new year,
I'll paint you in my image!
**[10:46] en**
Close the freaking window,
it's cold out there!
**[10:48] ryu**
Yeah, c'mon.
**[10:49] ryu**
It's cold.
**[10:51] mon**
Hey!
**[10:52] mon**
A monster just showed up!
**[10:54] mon**
Come on!
**[10:54] mon**
Stand up and fight!
**[10:56] en**
Can't you give us New Year's off?
**[10:57] at**
There's no way we can fight
in this cold. No way.
**[11:00] ryu**
I can't leave the kotatsu.
**[11:01] ryu**
I *will* not.
**[11:02] yu**
Wom-san's all curled up
under the kotatsu, too!
**[11:05] io**
Working the New Year's
holiday demands a pay bump.
**[11:08] io**
And it's currently midnight,
**[11:09] io**
so we'd need a late night bonus, too...
**[11:12] mon**
Oh no!
**[11:13] wom**
Don't go to any trouble.
**[11:15] en**
Then it's settled.
**[11:16] en**
We're taking the holiday off.
**[11:18] at**
It's decided.
**[11:21] all**
Cheers!
**[11:24] aki**
I bet they've all been
turned into snowmen by now.
**[11:29] haru**
Take that, Yumoto!
**[11:31] haru**
Take that, Defense Club!
**[11:33] dada**
Go on, eat your New Year's stew!
**[11:36] mon**
I can't tell them I went
home without getting them to fight me...
**[11:41] mon**
What do I do?!
***SIGN*** Beppu Akihiko Born August 21st Blood Type AB / Leo Hobbies: Calligraphy, Flute Likes: Rice balls
**[12:00] dada**
First calligraphy of the year, and...
**[12:02] dada**
New Year's decorations?
**[12:04] haru**
The new year must be greeted with beauty.
**[12:06] aki**
I'm writing our New Year's resolutions.
**[12:10] mon**
What do I do? What do I do?
**[12:12] mon**
I know.
**[12:13] mon**
I'll get them before they realize...
**[12:17] gora**
"I never know how to write
the 'Yu' in 'Yufuin.'"
**[12:20] at**
Here!
**[12:21] all**
He's so fast!
**[12:22] en**
He got another one!
**[12:24] at**
En-chan, you still only have three?
**[12:26] en**
So what if I do?
**[12:27] yu**
I've got three, too!
**[12:29] ryu**
I haven't gotten a single card yet.
**[12:32] ryu**
I'm a shoo-in for the punishment.
**[12:33] wom**
As am I.
**[12:35] wom**
It's the short arms that do it.
**[12:38] io**
So the third member
**[12:40] io**
of the designated shopper team will
either be Yufuin-senpai or Yumoto.
**[12:50] gora**
Hakone's—
**[12:51] all**
Me! Me me me!
**[12:56] gora**
—feels good.
**[12:56] yu**
I did it!
**[12:59] at**
So the punishment falls
to En, Ryuu, and Wom-san.
**[13:04] yu**
Hey, bad news!
**[13:06] yu**
Mr. Tawarayama's frozen over!
**[13:10] en**
Hey.
**[13:11] ryu**
Yeah?
**[13:12] en**
What's the deal with dominos?
**[13:15] en**
They make no sense.
**[13:17] ryu**
In the end, you just knock them all over.
**[13:19] ryu**
I don't get the motivation behind it.
**[13:22] wom**
The enjoyment comes
**[13:23] wom**
from the thrill of accomplishment at
seeing something through together—
**[13:27] en**
Yeah, there's none.
**[13:29] ryu**
Speaking of, I don't get the motivation for
being on those male cheer squads, either.
**[13:33] ryu**
They're supposed to be encouraging people!
**[13:34] en**
Yeah, guys in big jackets clapping on a
3-3-7 beat doesn't really do it for me.
**[13:39] wom**
It's a tradition overflowing
with manly spirit,
**[13:41] wom**
the bonds of male friendship,
**[13:43] wom**
and other such wonderful...
**[13:45] mon**
If they won't fight me, I'll
bring the fight to them!
**[13:57] ryu**
Speaking of things I don't understand,
what's with the way girls go shopping?
**[14:04] yu**
One, and... two!
**[14:07] yu**
I win!
**[14:09] at**
I'm so sick of this.
**[14:11] io**
We've done karuta, fukuwarai,
and top-spinning.
**[14:14] io**
This is the game we're stuck with.
**[14:16] en**
Skipping makes no sense to me, either.
**[14:18] ryu**
Yeah, I hear you!
**[14:20] ryu**
You just bounce up and down,
barely moving forward at all!
**[14:24] en**
It also makes you more
likely to trip and fall.
**[14:26] wom**
I think it's a full-body expression of that
**[14:29] wom**
whoop-de-doo, pitter-patter,
zing-zing feeling in your heart!
**[14:33] en**
Whoop-de-doo, pitter-patter, zing-zing...
**[14:36] en**
I haven't had a lot of that lately.
**[14:38] ryu**
Same.
**[14:39] ryu**
It's all been hurgh and brrr for me lately.
**[14:42] mon**
If you want whoop-de-doo,
pitter-patter, zing-zing that bad,
**[14:45] mon**
I'll give it to you!
**[14:47] mon**
Snow, snow, snow, blizzard!
**[14:53] ryu**
Senpai!
**[14:54] ryu**
Skipping is great, huh?
**[14:56] ryu**
Even though it's a blizzard,
I'm having tons of fun!
**[14:58] en**
Yeah!
**[14:59] en**
Why did I reject it for so long?
**[15:02] en**
It's a crime that only kids do it!
**[15:04] wom**
I feel utterly whoop-de-doo,
pitter-patter, zing-zing!
**[15:08] mon**
The attack's not working at all!
**[15:10] mon**
In that case, time for the "Slip and Fall in the Snow
**[15:13] mon**
That Encompasses College Entrance
Exam-Takers Nationwide" Attack!
**[15:19] en**
It's slippery here.
**[15:20] en**
Be careful.
**[15:45] ryu**
I haven't had a pitter-patter zing-zing
feeling like this in a while.
**[15:48] en**
Yeah,
**[15:49] en**
I guess we used to do stuff
like that every day, huh?
**[15:53] yu**
Senpai!
**[15:55] yu**
Let's go!
**[15:59] at**
I'm starting to forget which
side got the punishment.
**[16:04] at**
You know?
**[16:04] io**
Yes.
**[16:07] yu**
I did it!
**[16:09] at**
Yeah, you did!
**[16:10] io**
Then let me show you what
happens when I get serious!
**[16:18] gora**
Hey, you're all playing!
**[16:22] gora**
Hey now, big brother's going
to get serious now, too!
***SIGN*** Get within five meters of Gora-san.
***SIGN*** Make eye contact with Gora-san five times.
**[16:32] aki**
This is a true ward against evil.
**[16:37] gora**
*Why, you!*
**[16:39] both**
That voice!
**[16:50] haru**
That sweater!
**[16:51] aki**
That's the Gora-san sweater
we stayed up all night
**[16:55] aki**
knitting for Gora-san!
**[16:57] both**
Unforgivable!
**[16:59] haru**
What is that Snowman Monster doing?
**[17:02] dada**
What's all the fuss?
**[17:04] aki**
Dadacha, call Snowman
Monster back here at once!
**[17:07] dada**
G-Got it!
**[17:11] en**
Why is it totally clear here?
**[17:13] ryu**
It looks like the snow clouds are completely
focused on the Kurotama Bath area.
**[17:17] wom**
Just a day into the new year and
things are already getting strange...
**[17:22] mon**
I couldn't beat them.
**[17:24] mon**
I suppose it's time for an artful suicide...
**[17:26] dada**
What are you doing here?!
**[17:28] dada**
Get back there and fight them!
**[17:30] at**
That was surprising.
**[17:32] at**
Io, you know a lot about building igloos.
**[17:34] yu**
I'm surprised you knew how
to stack up the blocks!
**[17:38] io**
To be honest, when I was a child,
**[17:41] io**
I was known as "Igloo Maker Naru."
**[17:44] ryu**
We're back!
**[17:46] ryu**
Hey, an igloo!
**[17:47] yu**
Igloo Maker Naru gave it his all!
**[17:51] yu**
Okay, everyone get inside!
**[17:54] yu**
Huh?
**[18:02] mon**
My leg!
**[18:03] mon**
It hurts, darn it!
**[18:06] at**
What now?
**[18:07] en**
We told you, we're not working today.
**[18:11] mon**
If you won't fight...
**[18:15] mon**
Then I'll destroy the igloo you built
**[18:17] mon**
and make it into a snowman!
**[18:20] yu**
You can't!
**[18:21] yu**
Igloo Maker Naru worked hard on that!
**[18:24] mon**
Then fight me!
**[18:26] wom**
You have no choice!
**[18:27] wom**
It's the first Love Making of the new year!
**[18:31] yu**
Love Making!
**[18:37] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[18:40] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[18:43] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[18:44] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[18:47] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[18:49] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[18:52] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[18:54] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[18:57] ryu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[18:59] ryu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[19:01] en**
This love-filled planet will
not abide those who lack love!
**[19:05] ryu**
Those who wield loveless
power must kneel before love!
**[19:09] io**
Love is power!
**[19:10] io**
Love is hope!
**[19:12] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[19:14] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[19:16] yu**
Love!
**[19:16] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[19:20] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[19:21] yu**
Feel the power...
**[19:23] five**
Of love!
**[19:27] mon**
You could never understand...
**[19:29] mon**
How it feels to keep rolling like a snowball,
**[19:32] mon**
then to melt without ever seeing spring.
**[19:35] mon**
The same thing, year after year...
**[19:39] mon**
The feelings of a snowman
**[19:42] mon**
who can never escape winter...
**[19:47] yu**
But everyone loves snowmen.
**[19:50] yu**
They make our hearts feel
like warm and toasty spring.
**[19:53] mon**
Warm and toasty spring?
**[19:55] yu**
As long as you live in everyone's hearts,
**[19:58] yu**
even a snowman can see spring.
**[20:02] mon**
I can see spring, too?
**[20:05] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[20:20] yu**
Love is over!
**[20:27] yu**
Hey, it really was sunny
out, just like spring!
**[20:31] wom**
When it's New Year, spring's not far away!
**[20:34] yu**
Getting to spend both New Year's Eve
and New Year's Day with you guys
**[20:36] yu**
and my brother is a great
sign of things to come!
**[20:39] yu**
I'm so grateful to that monster!
**[20:41] both**
What?!
**[20:43] haru**
Even looking on the bright
side has its limits!
**[20:45] haru**
Being grateful for a monster?!
**[20:47] aki**
What have we been doing wrong?
**[20:50] aki**
No...
**[20:50] aki**
the real question is, what
is wrong with Hakone Yumoto?
**[20:53] aki**
If even this doesn't get the point through...
***SIGN*** Lucky
Sweet Sake
Free
**[21:01] yu**
It's hot!
**[21:02] yu**
But delicious!
**[21:04] en**
I don't know how you can drink that.
**[21:06] en**
You can still taste the rice
grains. I can't stand it.
**[21:08] ryu**
Same here!
**[21:09] ryu**
Senpai, we're pretty in sync this year!
**[21:11] en**
No, we're not.
**[21:14] at**
So, En-chan, what did you wish for?
**[21:18] en**
For the kind of year where I
can spend every day skipping.
**[21:21] at**
Huh?
**[21:27] ryu**
That's the guy...
**[21:29] io**
I hope he finds his spring this year.
**[21:43] yu**
Brothers-senpai!
**[21:44] yu**
Happy New Year!
**[21:45] haru**
How dense can you get?
**[21:47] aki**
How have you not realized it?
**[21:49] yu**
Realized what?
**[21:50] haru**
Don't play dumb!
**[21:52] haru**
We're the ones who have been
sending monsters after you!
**[21:57] aki**
Don't you get it yet?
**[21:59] aki**
We, the brothers, are...
**[22:09] both**
The twin stars shining in the heavens!
**[22:11] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[22:13] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[22:16] both**
Galaxy Idols: The VEPPer!
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** The Chemical Substance of Love
**[23:54] ryu**
Next time: "The Chemical Substance
of Love!"
**[23:57] ryu**
Love Making!
**[23:58] ---**
# 9 - The Chemical Substance of Love
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] en**
--
**[00:00] wom**
--
**[00:00] yu**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:07] haru**
Dammit...
**[00:09] both**
Damn that Defense Club!
**[00:11] (Flashback) aki**
How have you not realized it?
**[00:13] (Flashback) yu**
Realized what?
**[00:15] (Flashback) haru**
Don't play dumb!
**[00:16] (Flashback) haru**
We're the ones who have been
sending monsters after you!
**[00:22] (Flashback) aki**
Don't you get it yet?
**[00:23] (Flashback) aki**
We, the brothers, are...
**[00:26] (Flashback) both**
Galaxy Idols: The VEPPer!
**[00:33] haru**
They've ignored us since New Year...
**[00:36] haru**
that's a month and a half!
**[00:38] aki**
Unforgivable.
**[00:39] aki**
We revealed our secret...
**[00:41] aki**
we gave them the shock
of a lifetime, and yet...
**[00:45] haru**
We identified ourselves explicitly,
***SIGN*** Grr grr grr grr
**[00:47] haru**
yet they didn't say a
single word in response...
**[00:49] haru**
Are they mocking us?!
**[00:51] aki**
What they're doing isn't even mocking us.
**[00:54] aki**
I think they don't even care about us at all.
**[00:57] haru**
Unforgivable!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[01:00] yu**
Oh yeah!
**[01:01] yu**
Did you know?
**[01:03] yu**
Tomorrow's Valentine's Day!
**[01:05] en**
Oh, I totally forgot.
***SIGN*** Oden
Warm and Fluffy!
**[01:07] en**
But I'm sure Atsushi will
be giving me something.
**[01:09] at**
Something? You mean chocolate, right?
**[01:12] at**
Speaking of forgetting things,
**[01:15] at**
are you sure we shouldn't be doing
something about the Beppu Brothers?
**[01:18] ryu**
Yeah, they were all...
**[01:20] ryu**
"Galaxy Idol the VEPPer,"
or something, right?
**[01:25] io**
We've ignored them for a month and a half.
**[01:27] io**
It's a little late to comment on it now.
**[01:29] yu**
I'm just glad we know where
the monsters are coming from!
**[01:34] at**
Yeah, that's true.
**[01:36] wom**
That the Beppu Brothers are creating monsters
**[01:39] wom**
is an alarming problem in itself!
**[01:41] en**
Yeah, those two don't really seem
like the type to just drop it...
***SIGN*** The Chemical Substance of Love
**[03:29] yu**
What's with those helicopters?
**[03:31] gora**
They seem to be carrying chocolate.
**[03:33] yu**
Wow!
**[03:34] yu**
They're getting that much chocolate?
**[03:37] haru**
Another year, another
enormous pile of chocolate.
**[03:40] aki**
Eating it all would be fatal.
**[03:43] aki**
Finding ways to dispose of it all
every year is not an easy task.
**[03:45] yu**
Galaxy Idols The VEPPer sure are a cut above!
**[03:49] gora**
Galaxy Idols?
**[03:50] yu**
Yeah, that's what they called themselves!
**[03:55] yu**
Bro?
**[03:57] gora**
Oh, Yumoto.
**[03:59] gora**
I made chocolate breakfast gruel.
**[04:03] yu**
Wow! Great!
**[04:05] yu**
Looks delicious!
**[04:07] gora**
You should eat it while it's still hot.
**[04:09] gora**
It's got barley and rice.
**[04:10] yu**
Thanks, Bro!
**[04:15] aki**
That's the Gora we know.
**[04:17] aki**
Barley chocolate is delicious.
**[04:19] aki**
That means chocolate barley rice
gruel must be delicious, too.
**[04:23] haru**
Dammit!
**[04:23] haru**
I want it!
**[04:25] haru**
If not for Hakone Yumoto...
**[04:29] aki**
Why don't we get rid of him?
**[04:31] aki**
They've ignored us for a month and a half...
**[04:35] haru**
This time, at last, we'll
settle things with them.
**[04:39] dada**
Yeah!
**[04:40] dada**
Let's beat 'em!
**[04:41] both**
Valentine's Day will be the
day Hakone Yumoto dies.
**[04:51] ryu**
Io, did you bring any paper bags?
**[04:53] ryu**
I'll probably get more by
the time school's over.
**[04:55] ryu**
I can't carry it all.
**[04:57] io**
I thought this might happen, so I
arranged for a truck to come by.
**[05:01] io**
I'll send you the bill later, of course.
**[05:03] ryu**
That's the Io I know!
**[05:05] ryu**
Just find a way to get
me out of the bill, okay?
**[05:07] ryu**
I'll give you chocolate!
***SIGN*** Io
**[05:10] io**
I'm getting plenty of chocolate from
the candy companies I own stock in.
**[05:15] io**
But I'll take it, if you're offering.
**[05:18] ryu**
I wonder if you'll be the one ending
up with the most chocolate.
**[05:24] en**
This is delicious!
**[05:25] at**
Right?
**[05:26] at**
I tried to cut back on
the sweetness this year.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[05:35] yu**
You mean it just showed up?
**[05:38] at**
It looks like very expensive wrapping.
**[05:40] ryu**
Yeah...
**[05:42] io**
The message is handwritten, too.
**[05:44] en**
Who's it addressed to?
**[05:46] wom**
Anyway, why don't we open it?
**[05:48] wom**
There might be a letter or something inside!
**[05:51] en**
Are you sure we should be doing this?
**[05:52] yu**
I'm sure!
**[05:54] yu**
I wanna eat chocolate!
**[06:01] en**
What?
**[06:02] en**
So it's to all of us?
**[06:04] io**
The cards are hand-written, and
the bouquets are all different...
**[06:08] ryu**
But there's none for Wom-san.
**[06:10] wom**
Yes, that is certainly a shame.
**[06:13] en**
So what do we do with them?
**[06:15] at**
Not eat them, that's for sure.
**[06:16] at**
We don't even know who it's from.
**[06:19] ryu**
That's right!
**[06:21] ryu**
We've got plenty of other
stuff to eat anyway.
**[06:23] io**
And nothing is more terrifying than "free."
**[06:26] yu**
But that would be rude to the
person who gave it to us!
**[06:28] yu**
I'm gonna try it!
**[06:30] ryu**
Idiot! Don't do that!
**[06:33] yu**
Delicious!
**[06:34] yu**
This chocolate is really delicious!
**[06:37] yu**
But...
**[06:38] ryu**
What's wrong, Yumoto?
**[06:42] haru**
I bet they're crying about now.
**[06:45] aki**
They need to learn that life
isn't all wine and roses.
**[06:49] haru**
You do have a good idea
from time to time, Dadacha.
**[06:51] dada**
I'm honored by your compliment!
***SIGN*** Dark chocolate
***SIGN*** Endorphins
**[06:54] dada**
Dark chocolate causes the brain to release
neuropeptides known as endorphins,
***SIGN*** Brain
**[07:00] dada**
which produce feelings of happiness
and stimulate the mind.
**[07:02] dada**
At the same time, it also
raises the heart rate.
**[07:06] dada**
I've fused that with capsicum extract using
my highly advanced scientific technology...
**[07:12] dada**
If they eat it, they'll end up
so stimulated and high on joy,
**[07:16] dada**
their combat prowess will be diminshed!
**[07:20] dada**
And that's how it works!
**[07:22] aki**
Well, we don't really care about that...
**[07:24] haru**
But this time, we'll crush the Defense Club!
**[07:27] haru**
And in the process, rid
ourselves of Hakone Yumoto!
**[07:29] aki**
That super-spicy chocolate will
be but a minor entertainment
**[07:32] aki**
before we crush Hakone Yumoto.
**[07:34] aki**
And we'll drive the rest of the Battle
Lovers to destruction in the process.
**[07:37] haru**
Yes.
**[07:38] haru**
We've found a lot of good
monster candidates this time.
**[07:47] yu**
But I feel kind of excited and good!
**[07:51] yu**
Time for a cuddlefest!
**[07:57] yu**
And...
**[07:59] yu**
I want to cuddle you senpai, too!
**[08:02] yu**
Senpai...
**[08:03] yu**
I love you!
**[08:05] ryu**
No way!
**[08:06] at**
There's something definitely
weird in that chocolate...
**[08:09] en**
Anyway, we'd better run.
**[08:10] io**
Good idea!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[08:11] yu**
Senpai!
**[08:15] yu**
Senpai! Where are you?
**[08:18] yu**
En-chan-senpai?
**[08:19] at**
Hey, he singled you out.
**[08:21] yu**
Found you!
**[08:23] yu**
You always act so indifferent,
**[08:25] yu**
but I know you really care
about us, En-chan-senpai!
**[08:28] yu**
I love you for it!
**[08:30] at**
He confessed his love while cuddling him...
**[08:32] io**
Just hearing it is embarrassing.
**[08:35] ryu**
Yumoto's got passion.
**[08:36] en**
Yumoto! Atsushi's right there! There!
**[08:38] at**
En-chan!
**[08:39] io**
Selling out his friend?
**[08:40] yu**
Yeah! Atsushi-senpai!
**[08:40] at**
Hey, Yumoto, calm down!
**[08:43] yu**
Atsushi-senpai, I think you're the
reason the Defense Club exists!
**[08:47] yu**
You're like a mom, but I think you
secretly have a dark side, too!
**[08:52] yu**
I love that about you!
**[08:53] at**
Stop it!
**[08:54] en**
Well, that sucked.
**[08:56] ryu**
You know, Senpai, you sold
out your best friend.
**[08:59] en**
Atsushi would have done the same thing.
**[09:01] io**
I can't deny it.
**[09:02] at**
Yumoto, that's enough.
**[09:04] at**
Look. Ryuu's right there!
**[09:05] ryu**
Are you kidding me?!
**[09:06] yu**
Ryuu-senpai...
**[09:06] ryu**
I'm outta here!
**[09:09] yu**
You say you love girls,
**[09:12] yu**
but I know you treasure us most of all.
**[09:17] yu**
And I love you too, Ryuu-senpai!
**[09:20] ryu**
Cut it out!
**[09:21] en**
Is it just my imagination,
or is Ryuu enjoying this?
**[09:24] io**
I can't look directly at it.
**[09:26] at**
But you're up next, Io.
**[09:27] yu**
Io-senpai!
**[09:28] io**
No, I believe I'll pass!
**[09:31] yu**
Io-senpai, I know you value money,
**[09:34] yu**
but you value the love we
share the most! I love you!
**[09:39] io**
I-I get it! So please, stop it!
**[09:41] ryu**
Io's not used to that kind of thing.
**[09:44] at**
Yeah, he's red as a beet.
**[09:46] en**
What are we gonna do about this?
**[09:48] wom**
I just investigated,
**[09:49] wom**
and those chocolates
**[09:50] wom**
have the chemical substance
capsicum inside them!
**[09:55] wom**
We just have to wait for
his excitement to wear off!
**[09:57] en**
So when will it wear off?
**[10:00] wom**
I'm afraid I don't know...
**[10:03] yu**
Come on, let's have another cuddle party!
**[10:08] yu**
Senpai, wait for me!
**[10:13] haru**
It's all going as planned, I see.
**[10:15] aki**
How are you feeling, Hakone Yumoto?
**[10:17] aki**
Amazing, right?
**[10:19] yu**
Yeah, just amazing!
**[10:21] haru**
He's stupid.
**[10:22] haru**
He's far too stupid.
**[10:23] aki**
How could someone like him
get Gora-san all to himself?
**[10:27] ryu**
Does that mean you're the guys who
sent us those weird chocolates?
**[10:32] haru**
Yeah, that's right!
**[10:33] haru**
Because you're in our way, to be honest!
**[10:35] aki**
How dare you ignore our declaration
of war for a month and a half!
**[10:40] aki**
Today, at last, we're going to eliminate you!
**[10:43] aki**
From the universe itself!
**[10:47] shu**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[10:51] en**
What the heck?
**[10:52] at**
What's with this song?
**[10:53] shu**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[10:57] shu**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[11:07] shu**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[11:13] shu**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[11:15] both**
The twin stars shining in the heavens!
**[11:17] shu**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[11:18] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[11:19] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[11:22] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[11:28] aki**
Let me be frank.
**[11:29] aki**
We find you unacceptable as
rivals for idols like us.
**[11:32] haru**
In other words, we hate your guts!
**[11:35] haru**
In particular...
**[11:36] both**
Hakone Yumoto!
**[11:37] yu**
Huh?
**[11:38] yu**
What was that?
**[11:40] aki**
If not for you...
**[11:42] haru**
...he would be ours...
**[11:45] aki**
Knowing that you're idols like us
**[11:48] aki**
really gets under our skin!
**[11:50] yu**
Huh? Idols like you?
**[11:53] aki**
Hakone Yumoto.
**[11:54] aki**
You must disappear from this
world... from this universe!
**[11:58] haru**
That goes for all of you!
**[11:59] haru**
Let's go, Battle Lovers!
**[12:02] both**
It's time for an idol showdown!
**[12:04] en**
Hey, they're talking about idols again.
**[12:07] at**
What does that even mean?
**[12:08] ryu**
Well, I'm an idol, at least...
**[12:11] io**
I can say with confidence
that I am *not* an idol.
**[12:15] wom**
But what we do know
**[12:17] wom**
is that the VEPPer are the
ones sending the monsters!
**[12:20] wom**
We should probably fight...
**[12:22] en**
Sure, but it doesn't seem like
they're trying to destroy Earth
**[12:24] en**
or humanity like the
Conquest Club from before.
**[12:28] en**
I say we ignore them.
**[12:29] at**
Yeah, ignore them.
**[12:31] ryu**
Agreed.
**[12:31] io**
We're not making any money off it, so...
**[12:33] en**
Well, so long!
**[12:37] aki**
S-Stop it!
**[12:38] aki**
What are you thinking?
**[12:39] haru**
Dammit!
**[12:40] haru**
Stop that! It feels so good!
**[12:42] dada**
I think we'd better send a monster!
**[12:44] aki**
First, get us out of here!
**[12:46] dada**
Okay! Fluffhugger!
**[12:49] yu**
I can't see!
***SIGN*** Beppu Haruhiko Born August 21st Blood Type AB / Leo Hobbies: Bonsai, Gardening, Horseback Riding Likes: Rice balls
**[12:58] haru**
Listen, you lot.
**[12:59] haru**
You're our loyal followers, aren't you?
**[13:02] all**
Yes!
**[13:03] aki**
And what's more, you've never once
received chocolate from anyone.
**[13:08] all**
Yes!
**[13:10] haru**
Then show your love for us
**[13:12] haru**
by turning those years of resentment
into hatred for the Battle Lovers!
**[13:18] aki**
They get lots of chocolate!
**[13:21] aki**
Possibly even more than we did!
**[13:24] aki**
Hate them!
**[13:25] aki**
Because our own hatred
of them is irrepressible!
**[13:28] all**
Yes!
**[13:30] both**
We and our apes are as one!
**[13:35] aki**
Then let us...
**[13:36] haru**
...grant your wish!
**[13:44] haru**
*Lucky you!*
**[13:45] haru**
*Open your eyes!*
**[13:47] haru**
*Happy you!*
**[13:48] haru**
*Open them wide!*
**[13:50] haru**
*You won't want to miss it...*
**[13:53] haru**
*The big bang of love, dreams, and light!*
**[13:59] haru**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
blooming in the galaxy!*
**[14:06] haru**
*Moon and sun, miracles and secrets*
**[14:07] both**
The twin stars shining in the heavens!
**[14:09] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[14:09] haru**
*We're the stars making wishes come true!*
**[14:10] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[14:12] haru**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[14:13] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[14:17] both**
Chosen warriors!
**[14:19] haru**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[14:19] haru**
Lucky you!
**[14:21] aki**
Happy you!
**[14:22] haru**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[14:24] both**
Shooting...
**[14:25] both**
Star!
**[14:35] aki**
Now we just have to send them to bust
up that perverted Hakone Yumoto...
**[14:38] aki**
and the rest of the Defense Club.
**[14:41] haru**
We'll bury them in chocolate.
**[14:45] both**
Eat too much chocolate
and suffer the cavities,
**[14:48] both**
Hakone Yumoto and allies!
**[14:51] yu**
Senpai!
**[14:53] yu**
I wanna cuddle more!
**[14:57] yu**
The True Lovracelet...
**[14:59] at**
I guess a monster must have appeared.
**[15:00] en**
At a time like this?
**[15:02] ryu**
And we can't even handle Yumoto...
**[15:04] io**
Is it even okay for Yumoto to
transform in the state he's in?
**[15:09] wom**
Regardless, everyone!
**[15:10] wom**
Let's Love Making!
**[15:13] yu**
Love Making!
**[15:41] yu**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[15:43] yu**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[15:46] en**
Love Making.
**[15:57] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[15:59] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[16:01] atsu**
Love Making.
**[16:11] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[16:13] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[16:16] io**
Love Making.
**[16:26] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[16:28] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[16:31] ryu**
Love Making!
**[16:41] ryu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[16:43] ryu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[16:47] en**
This love-filled planet
**[16:49] en**
will not abide those who lack love!
**[16:51] ryu**
Those who wield loveless power
**[16:53] ryu**
must kneel before love!
**[16:55] io**
Love is power!
**[16:56] io**
Love is hope!
**[16:58] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[16:59] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[17:01] yu**
Love!
**[17:02] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[17:05] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[17:07] yu**
Feel the power...
**[17:09] five**
of love!
**[17:12] aki**
This is our final battle!
**[17:14] haru**
Get ready, Battle Lovers!
**[17:17] both**
And Hakone Yumoto!
**[17:19] at**
Looks like they have a
particular hatred of Yumoto.
**[17:22] en**
This is so annoying.
**[17:24] en**
Can't we just run away?
**[17:26] at**
Yeah.
**[17:27] at**
I don't see any reason why we should fight...
**[17:29] ryu**
I've got preparations to make
for my Valentine's dates.
**[17:32] io**
I'm interested in checking the
stocks for my candy companies.
**[17:36] yu**
No!
**[17:37] yu**
We can't just let the
monsters stay like that!
**[17:41] yu**
I'm gonna save them all
with the power of our love!
**[17:44] en**
Oh, hell.
**[17:45] en**
Yumoto's getting into it.
**[17:46] at**
How about we just let him
take point this time?
**[17:49] ryu**
I'm in!
**[17:50] io**
No objections here.
**[17:51] wom**
But, everyone!
**[17:52] wom**
You're not going to fight?
**[17:54] en**
I have no reason to fight.
**[17:56] at**
This whole idol showdown thing is beyond me.
**[17:58] yu**
Okay!
**[17:59] yu**
Everyone who wants a cuddle, gather 'round!
**[18:03] ryu**
What the heck?
**[18:04] wom**
I'm sure he has a plan!
**[18:06] yu**
Hey! Come here!
**[18:08] yu**
Gather 'round!
**[18:10] yu**
Come on!
**[18:11] yu**
My wellspring of love never stops gushing!
**[18:15] en**
Is it okay to let this happen?
**[18:17] at**
There are quite a lot of monsters...
**[18:19] ryu**
Looks like trouble.
**[18:20] io**
It would be hard to take them all alone...
**[18:24] yu**
Okay, let's get going!
**[18:26] yu**
A drop of love for each of you!
**[18:29] en**
A new technique?
**[18:30] at**
Yumoto's got a real flair for the dramatic.
**[18:32] ryu**
I can't watch.
**[18:34] io**
I wonder where he learned that.
**[18:36] yu**
Go flying, Love Sprinkle!
**[18:41] en**
Yep, it's a new technique.
**[18:43] wom**
Even I never expected a technique like this!
**[18:51] mon**
What is this feeling?
**[18:52] mon**
Strange but enjoyable!
**[18:54] mon**
I don't know what it is,
but it makes me happy!
**[18:59] haru**
What the hell is that?
**[19:00] aki**
Those love-starved monsters...
**[19:03] aki**
It's like feeling love for the
first time has addled their minds.
**[19:06] dada**
This is a very bad development!
**[19:06] yu**
Love is good!
**[19:08] yu**
It feels so good!
**[19:10] yu**
Now everyone, wallow in the love!
**[19:15] mon**
Let's support him!
**[19:15] mon**
Let's all support that red angel!
***SIGN*** LOVE
**[19:19] all**
Red angel! Cha-cha-cha!
**[19:21] all**
Red angel! Cha-cha-cha!
***SIGN*** Wave Your Hands
**[19:22] en**
Red angel?
**[19:23] ryu**
I think they mean Yumoto...
**[19:25] at**
They seem to really love him.
**[19:27] io**
It's a bit creepy, but I can feel it.
**[19:29] haru**
What are they doing?
**[19:31] aki**
Their chants make no sense.
**[19:34] aki**
They're idiots, start to finish.
**[19:36] en**
That's enough, Yumoto.
**[19:36] yu**
Thanks, everyone!
**[19:37] en**
You're too pleased with yourself.
**[19:39] at**
Yumoto!
**[19:41] at**
Use the True Love Fountain already!
**[19:44] yu**
Okay!
**[19:45] yu**
Everyone, accept my love!
**[19:48] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[20:03] yu**
Love is over!
**[20:08] boy**
That kid's pretty cute!
**[20:10] boy**
He looks like an idol!
**[20:14] dada**
Haru-chan, Aki-chan!
**[20:15] dada**
I think it's time you stepped in!
**[20:18] aki**
Yes.
**[20:20] aki**
I can't stand to look at this
disgusting sight anymore.
**[20:23] haru**
Hakone Yumoto really is unforgivable!
**[20:26] haru**
Hey!
**[20:26] haru**
It's not over yet!
**[20:28] aki**
We're going to fight you!
**[20:31] yu**
But I don't wanna fight!
**[20:33] yu**
I wanna cuddle with you again, VEPPer-san!
**[20:36] both**
Silence!
**[20:37] haru**
Unlucky you!
**[20:39] aki**
Unhappy you!
**[20:41] haru**
Take our resentment...
**[20:43] aki**
...and be grateful to get it!
**[20:45] both**
Deadly...
**[20:48] yu**
Cuddle!
**[20:51] aki**
This is so humiliating!
**[20:52] haru**
Shut up! Stop it!
**[20:55] aki**
I can't take it, Haru!
**[20:56] aki**
Let's pull back for now!
**[20:57] haru**
Yeah, I can't take it!
**[20:59] yu**
But wait!
**[21:02] yu**
They left.
**[21:04] yu**
Okay, Senpai!
**[21:06] yu**
Please let me cuddle you!
**[21:14] en**
It's no use.
**[21:15] at**
Isn't there any way to snap him out of it?
**[21:18] ryu**
Let's take him to the bath! The bath!
**[21:19] io**
That's a fine idea!
**[21:23] en**
Come on, Yumoto!
**[21:24] yu**
What's going on!?
**[21:30] yu**
I wanna cuddle more...
**[21:33] go**
What's wrong, Yumoto?!
**[21:35] en**
Sir, Yumoto's been acting strangely
**[21:36] en**
since he ate some chocolate
the Beppu Brothers gave him.
**[21:40] go**
What?!
**[21:47] go**
Be strong, Yumoto!
**[21:49] go**
Snap out of it!
**[21:51] yu**
Huh?
**[21:52] yu**
Why am I in the bath with you, bro?
**[21:55] go**
You're all right now.
**[21:56] go**
I'm so glad you're safe.
**[21:57] yu**
Huh?
**[21:58] en**
As always, Gora-san brings
the serious brotherly love.
**[22:02] ryu**
But what's up with those Beppu Brothers?
**[22:04] at**
They were firing off some kind
of move or something, right?
**[22:09] io**
They gave themselves that weird name, too.
**[22:11] io**
I guess there's more to
them that meets the eye.
**[22:13] wom**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer...
**[22:17] wom**
We cannot ignore them!
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Days of Love and Acclaim
**[23:54] io**
Next time: "Days of Love
and Acclaim!"
**[23:57] io**
Love Making!
**[23:58] ---**
# 10 - Days of Love and Acclaim
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] both**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] en**
--
**[00:00] ryu**
--
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[00:08] yu**
Mornin'...
**[00:09] all**
Heya.
**[00:09] io**
Good day.
**[00:15] en**
There's something you don't see every day...
**[00:17] at**
What is it?
**[00:18] en**
Yumoto just sighed!
**[00:20] all**
What?
**[00:20] all**
No way!
**[00:21] yu**
What?
**[00:23] yu**
I can sigh sometimes, too...
**[00:25] en**
Can not.
**[00:26] at**
Yeah, you can't.
**[00:27] ryu**
Can't.
**[00:28] io**
You cannot.
**[00:29] wom**
What happened?
**[00:31] wom**
Does it have anything to do with VEPPer?
**[00:33] yu**
No, I don't care about that.
**[00:36] en**
Wombat's been getting more careless with
how he treats Mr. Tawarayama lately.
**[00:40] io**
I believe he's always been that way.
**[00:42] ryu**
So rude to a dead person.
**[00:44] wom**
He is not dead!
**[00:46] wom**
He's just in sleep mode!
**[00:47] ryu**
What is he, a computer?
**[00:49] at**
So why are you sighing, Yumoto?
**[00:54] yu**
Something important to me is going away.
**[00:56] io**
Something important to you?
**[00:58] en**
Not Wombat?
**[01:00] at**
I'm curious.
**[01:01] at**
What is it?
**[01:02] ryu**
This isn't a sex thing, is it?
**[01:04] io**
Why are you asking so nervously?
**[01:07] yu**
It's not a sex thing!
**[01:08] yu**
It's Binan Land!
**[01:10] yu**
They're tearing it down!
**[01:13] all**
Oh.
**[01:16] yu**
What kind of hum-drum reaction is that?!
**[01:18] at**
I just haven't heard that name in so long.
**[01:22] io**
He's right.
***SIGN*** Notice About Closing of Binan Land
***SIGN*** To all our regular patrons, we must regrettably cease operations. We thank you for your loyal devotion all these years. Binan Land Staff
**[01:24] io**
It says Binan Land is closing
at the end of the month.
***SIGN*** Binan Land
Bringing You Tons of Fun!
**[01:28] ryu**
Well, go figure.
**[01:30] ryu**
I don't know a single couple who went
there that didn't break up afterwards.
**[01:33] en**
That's your standard?
**[01:35] ryu**
Well, if you're going on a date, it's
gotta be that You-Know-What-land or Sea.
**[01:39] at**
That's their brand. Young or old,
boy or girl, anyone can enjoy it.
**[01:43] en**
But Binan's just got the
sad old ferris wheel,
**[01:46] en**
the sad kid's coaster, and that's about it.
**[01:49] ryu**
And that other thing!
**[01:50] ryu**
The sad little merry-go-round!
**[01:52] io**
Wait a minute.
**[01:54] io**
It says they did a hero show at one point, too.
**[01:57] en**
Seriously?
**[01:58] io**
But "they were so scary, they stopped
after one performance," it says.
**[02:03] ryu**
What's there to be scared of in a hero show?
**[02:05] en**
And they only held one?
**[02:09] at**
So you have a choice between sad or scary?
**[02:11] at**
What a meeting of extremes!
**[02:12] yu**
You're all so mean, Senpai!
**[02:14] yu**
Stop calling it sad!
**[02:16] wom**
Binan Land...
**[02:18] wom**
There's something familiar about that name...
**[02:21] ryu**
You don't have to humor him.
**[02:23] io**
This is how the world works.
**[02:25] io**
Consider it an education.
**[02:27] yu**
You stupid-dupid numbat senpai!
**[02:34] io**
Were we too hard on him?
**[02:35] ryu**
He did say it was important to him...
**[02:38] en**
Just what is a numbat, anyway?
**[02:40] at**
Maybe he meant dingbat?
**[02:42] ryu**
Is a dingbat even a real thing?
**[02:45] io**
He could have also meant
nimrod or numbskull, too.
**[02:48] at**
I see.
**[02:50] at**
Yumoto quality.
**[02:51] en**
Either way, we were probably too hard on him.
**[02:54] all**
Yeah...
**[02:57] wom**
Binan Land...
**[03:00] wom**
I'm just sure I've heard that name...
**[03:01] ryu**
I told you, forget it!
***SIGN*** Days of Love and Acclaim
**[04:40] haru**
Stupidity might be the
strongest thing there is.
**[04:43] aki**
What I really can't stand is
***SIGN*** Foolish
**[04:45] aki**
how astronomically lame they
are compared to Gora-san.
**[04:49] haru**
You're so right.
**[04:50] haru**
I'd like them to disappear
without a single particle remaining.
**[04:53] jun**
I hate lame things, too.
***SIGN*** Junya Entaro
**[04:59] jun**
It's an honor to be here.
**[05:00] jun**
That reminds me.
**[05:01] jun**
Binan Land is finally closing, you know?
**[05:05] jun**
That place was just the lamest, right?
**[05:08] jun**
It never changed or improved,
just gathered rust.
**[05:11] jun**
I'm so glad it's going away!
**[05:21] haru**
Did you just call Binan Land lame?
**[05:23] aki**
You're the one who doesn't understand!
**[05:26] haru**
We're going to teach you...
**[05:28] aki**
...the wonders of Binan Land.
**[05:34] yu**
Those senpai of mine are just the worst!
**[05:37] gora**
Binan Land?
**[05:38] gora**
I had a rough time there...
**[05:41] yu**
Huh?
**[05:41] yu**
Bro, you're down on it, too?
**[05:44] gora**
Goodness, I nearly burned to death.
**[05:47] yu**
At Binan Land?
**[05:49] gora**
Though, looking back,
it's become a good memory.
**[05:56] all**
Yumoto-kun!
**[05:58] all**
We're very sorry!
**[06:00] all**
Let's go play!
**[06:03] yu**
We're here! We're here!
***SIGN*** Last Day
**[06:04] yu**
It's Binan Land! Yay!
**[06:06] en**
He sure is excited.
**[06:07] at**
You're not excited enough, En-chan.
**[06:10] yu**
But are you sure you want
to pay my entry fee?
**[06:13] at**
We're splitting your ticket,
so it's only 480 yen each.
**[06:17] yu**
480 yen?!
**[06:19] yu**
That's a lot of money!
**[06:20] en**
Just take it.
**[06:21] yu**
Thanks!
**[06:23] yu**
I thought this might happen,
**[06:25] yu**
so Bro made me some Bomb Rice Balls!
**[06:29] yu**
When you go to an amusement park,
you need ones with pickled plums,
**[06:31] yu**
tuna mayo, bonito flakes, hard-boiled egg,
**[06:33] yu**
fried chicken and vinegar-miso onions!
**[06:35] en**
I thought I heard one in there I
should really be objecting to...
**[06:40] yu**
It's good!
**[06:41] en**
Well, forget it.
**[06:44] en**
There's something pretty depressing
about a trip to the amusement park
**[06:47] en**
with a bunch of guys.
**[06:49] ryu**
Oh, really?
**[06:50] ryu**
I find it refreshing.
**[06:52] io**
It would be for you, Ryuu.
**[06:56] at**
It's the last day,
but there aren't many people...
**[06:59] en**
Really?
**[07:00] en**
Isn't this standard?
**[07:02] io**
What ride should we start with?
**[07:04] at**
That's right.
**[07:05] at**
We want rides, not attractions.
**[07:07] yu**
Oh! This one!
**[07:08] yu**
The Mad Mouse!
**[07:09] yu**
I rode this one seven times, then barfed!
**[07:12] yu**
I recommend it!
**[07:13] en**
You're sure it wasn't
the vinegar-miso onions?
**[07:15] at**
Why would you ride it until you barf?
**[07:17] yu**
The Mad Mouse is more hard core
than your standard roller coaster!
**[07:28] yu**
See? Hard core, right?
**[07:30] io**
Once was enough for me.
**[07:32] io**
You did it seven times?
**[07:33] ryu**
I can't believe you survived it.
**[07:35] yu**
Well, after I barfed,
**[07:38] yu**
Bro laid me down on a bench, and...
**[07:41] yu**
And what happened after that?
**[07:44] en**
What's wrong, Yumoto?
**[07:49] (Flashback) gora**
I'm sorry, Yumoto.
**[07:52] (Flashback) gora**
I should have stopped you
before it got so bad.
**[07:54] (Flashback) yu**
It's okay.
**[07:56] (Flashback) yu**
I just got too excited.
**[08:02] (Flashback) gora**
Yumoto, I'm sorry.
**[08:07] (Flashback) yu**
What's wrong, big bro?
**[08:10] (Flashback) yu**
Can you wait here a while by yourself?
**[08:12] (Flashback) yu**
Y-Yeah.
**[08:13] (Flashback) gora**
You're sure you'll be okay?
**[08:15] (Flashback) yu**
Yeah.
**[08:17] (Flashback) yu**
I'll be okay!
**[08:18] (Flashback) gora**
Okay.
**[08:19] (Flashback) gora**
I'll be back soon!
**[08:26] yu**
Huh?
**[08:27] yu**
When did he come back?
**[08:29] yu**
I don't remember him coming back...
**[08:31] ryu**
But if he didn't come back,
he wouldn't be here now, right?
**[08:34] yu**
That's true...
**[08:37] yu**
All I have is the memory of feeling
kind of anxious and lonely...
**[08:41] io**
Well, that axe was clearly
cause for concern, wasn't it?
**[08:46] at**
Hey.
**[08:46] at**
Do you think that CIDE
thing Gora-san mentioned...
**[08:50] wom**
Everyone!
**[08:54] wom**
Everyone!
**[08:56] wom**
You must Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
**[09:01] io**
Hey, the Doppler effect.
**[09:03] en**
You used to see that in tokusatsu and stuff.
**[09:06] en**
Scenes where they're screaming and you're like
"where are you even supposed to be yelling from?"
**[09:09] at**
We don't have a choice.
**[09:10] at**
Let's go, too!
**[09:12] all**
Yeah!
**[09:17] mon**
I'm tired of spinning around
and around in the same place!
**[09:24] mon**
The limited track.
**[09:25] mon**
The pre-designated movements.
**[09:26] mon**
The days of oppression.
**[09:28] mon**
I've had enough of it!
**[09:32] en**
Well, he has a point.
**[09:33] at**
I know how he feels.
**[09:35] mon**
Don't act like you understand!
**[09:38] yu**
Love Making!
**[09:42] yu**
Love!
**[09:43] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[09:46] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[09:48] yu**
Feel the power...
**[09:50] five**
...of love!
**[09:52] yu**
Let's go!
**[09:54] yu**
Scarlet Love Lumiere!
**[09:58] mon**
W-Wait a minute!
**[10:00] mon**
I have over 32 pages of detailed backstory!
**[10:04] mon**
Are you sure you want to
end this that quickly?
**[10:08] yu**
Backstory is only effective when
it's intertwined with the drama!
**[10:11] yu**
All you're doing is padding the narrative!
**[10:15] mon**
Th-That's cold...
**[10:17] yu**
If you've got a problem,
**[10:18] yu**
try changing yourself before
resenting everything else!
**[10:20] yu**
We can change the world!
**[10:27] yu**
True Love Attack!
**[10:39] yu**
True Love Fountain!
**[10:56] yu**
Love is over!
**[10:58] yu**
Okay!
**[10:59] yu**
Let's Love Out and ride the Mad Mouse again!
**[11:03] aki**
"We can change the world?"
**[11:05] haru**
Stop stealing lines!
**[11:08] en**
You two...
**[11:11] both**
Galaxy Idols...
**[11:13] both**
The VEPPer!
**[11:17] aki**
You five are so uncooperative.
**[11:20] haru**
Earth upbringing breeds poor taste.
**[11:22] haru**
Or rather, no taste at all.
**[11:24] aki**
That's right, I forgot.
**[11:27] aki**
We must apologize.
**[11:28] yu**
Um, VEPP-san...
**[11:30] both**
It's VEPPer!
**[11:33] yu**
VEPPer-san.
**[11:35] yu**
VEPPer-san, you say you're really big idols,
**[11:38] yu**
and I don't really understand, but okay.
**[11:42] yu**
I also get that we're not
even close to your level.
**[11:47] haru**
What are you talking about?
**[11:49] yu**
We're not trying to compete with you.
**[11:52] yu**
So could you stop fighting us?
**[11:54] yu**
I feel kind of bad for the people
you turn into monsters, don't you?
**[12:00] yu**
So if it might be possible...
**[12:03] yu**
Couldn't we just get along from now on?
**[12:09] en**
Yumoto, really...
**[12:10] at**
Sorry to be harsh, but that's awful.
**[12:12] yu**
Huh? How come?
**[12:15] ryu**
Would you be happy hearing,
"I won't date you, but can't we be friends"?
**[12:18] io**
It's like saying, "the investment failed,
so pay me back half the money."
**[12:24] yu**
Huh?
**[12:25] haru**
Hakone Yumoto...
**[12:29] aki**
And the Defense Club...
**[12:32] both**
We won't forget how you humiliated VEPPer!
**[12:36] haru**
You want to get along?
**[12:38] aki**
Isn't that funny?
**[12:40] aki**
Haru, it is truly funny!
**[12:42] haru**
We really want you to disappear!
**[12:45] aki**
Without a trace or a memory left behind!
**[12:50] at**
Wait a minute.
**[12:52] at**
There's really just one
question I want to ask you.
**[12:56] at**
Why do you hate us in the first place?
**[13:00] en**
You can't really hate someone
**[13:01] en**
unless they're at least on your own level...
**[13:09] both**
Maximum Gorar was a person who may
have become a big brother to us!
***SIGN*** Dadacha Born December 24th (adjusting for Earth calendar) Blood Type B (probably) Capricorn Hobbies: Secret Favorite food: Crickets
**[13:26] mon**
*This is the end, Maximum Gorar!*
**[13:29] haru**
Gorar!
**[13:30] aki**
Don't worry, Haru!
**[13:32] aki**
Maximum Gorar never loses!
**[13:34] haru**
Y-Yeah...
**[13:35] haru**
Maximum Gorar is invincible!
**[13:41] io**
Huh? M-Maxi...?
**[13:44] ryu**
Who's that?
**[13:45] yu**
That's Gora's hero name.
**[13:47] ryu**
Huh?
**[13:48] ryu**
The Beppu Brothers know Gora-san?
**[13:50] io**
I'm not sure whether to object
**[13:52] io**
first to the "may have become
a big brother" line, or...
**[13:55] wom**
Everyone!
**[13:57] wom**
I feel I should explain!
**[14:00] wom**
Until a while back, Earth played host
to a battle of love and justice!
**[14:06] wom**
The people watched this
battle and called it...
**[14:10] wom**
"Can I Destroy the Earth? 2"
***SIGN*** Can I Destroy the Earth? 2
**[14:14] wom**
"2" of course means there was a "1"!
**[14:18] yu**
That's my big bro!
**[14:19] wom**
That's right!
**[14:20] wom**
The man protecting the Earth
was the ultimate warrior,
**[14:23] wom**
Maximum Gorar!
**[14:29] haru**
And we were here!
**[14:31] aki**
Right here with Gora-san!
**[14:36] dada**
This is taking too long!
**[14:38] dada**
That's why I hate exposition episodes!
**[14:42] dada**
Forced Memory Transfer!
***SIGN*** Binan Land First Hero Show
**[14:50] (Flashback) mon**
To oblivion with this backwater planet!
**[14:56] (Flashback) mon**
Are you not afraid of me?
**[15:00] (Flashback) aki**
Well, there's a guy inside the suit, right?
**[15:03] (Flashback) haru**
It's hard playing the villain
in hero shows, huh, Mister?
**[15:10] (Flashback) haru**
What is it?
**[15:12] (Flashback) mon**
I like you!
**[15:13] (Flashback) mon**
That sarcasm and cool-headedness.
**[15:15] (Flashback) mon**
You would make fine henchmen for me!
**[15:20] (Flashback) haru**
Stranger danger!
**[15:21] (Flashback) aki**
Police!
**[15:22] (Flashback) mon**
Too bad, Earthlings.
**[15:24] (Flashback) mon**
I did my research, and found
out that amusement parks
**[15:26] (Flashback) mon**
are places where the existence
of aliens is tolerated.
**[15:31] (Flashback) haru**
Monsters aren't supposed to be that smart,
you big brute!
**[15:35] (Flashback) mon**
I'll teach you one more thing.
**[15:37] (Flashback) mon**
Do you know why monsters always
attack kindergarten buses?
**[15:39] (Flashback) aki**
Because they're on TV shows for kids, right?
**[15:42] (Flashback) aki**
Let us go!
**[15:43] (Flashback) mon**
No.
**[15:45] (Flashback) mon**
It's because young humans are
the easiest to brainwash.
**[15:48] (Flashback) mon**
Soon, I will make you worship me.
**[15:51] (Flashback) haru**
Will not!
**[15:53] (Flashback) aki**
Someone!
**[15:53] (Flashback) aki**
This guy's not acting!
**[15:55] (Flashback) haru**
Help us!
**[16:02] (Flashback) mon**
Your screams are useless!
**[16:04] (Flashback) mon**
No one can hear you!
**[16:06] (Flashback) gora**
I'm disappointed in you!
**[16:09] (Flashback) gora**
Seeing you attack young children!
**[16:13] (Flashback) mon**
Maximum Gorar!
**[16:19] (Flashback) gora**
Let those children go!
**[16:22] (Flashback) mon**
Never!
**[16:23] (Flashback) mon**
You're a mere thief,
attempting to steal my prey!
**[16:27] (Flashback) mon**
I will punish you!
**[16:33] (Flashback) gora**
Wood-Chopping Beam!
**[16:35] (Flashback) mon**
My, my.
**[16:36] (Flashback) mon**
Are you sure you want to do that?
**[16:37] (Flashback) mon**
Don't you care what happens
to these little Earthlings?
**[16:42] (Flashback) mon**
It seems you can't touch me
as long as I have hostages.
**[16:47] (Flashback) mon**
Today you die, Maximum Gorar!
**[16:50] (Flashback) mon**
Take this!
**[17:00] (Flashback) haru**
It's hot!
**[17:01] (Flashback) haru**
Don't tell me...
**[17:02] (Flashback) aki**
This is all real?
**[17:13] (Flashback) mon**
Rest in peace, Maximum Gorar!
**[17:17] (Flashback) both**
Gorar!
**[17:18] (Flashback) both**
Wake up! You have to wake up!
**[17:21] (Flashback) both**
Gorar, wake up!
**[17:23] (Flashback) both**
Maximum Gorar!
**[17:26] (Flashback) haru**
It can't be...
**[17:27] (Flashback) aki**
I don't like this plot twist.
**[17:29] (Flashback) mon**
It's no use.
**[17:30] (Flashback) mon**
Your fate has been decided.
**[17:32] (Flashback) mon**
You cannot change the world.
**[17:34] (Flashback) mon**
Let's go!
**[17:36] (Flashback) mon**
Next week, there will be a new twist!
**[17:42] (Flashback) gora**
...can change...
**[17:46] (Flashback) gora**
We... can change... the world.
**[17:51] (Flashback) mon**
He still has the strength to stand?
**[17:54] (Flashback) gora**
We *can* change the world!
**[17:56] (Flashback) mon**
What?
**[17:58] (Flashback) hashi**
Gorar!
**[17:59] (Flashback) hashi**
Use the Super Wood-Chopping Axe!
**[18:08] (Flashback) gora**
Super Wood-Chopping Axe!
**[18:18] (Flashback) haru**
Gorar! Thank you!
**[18:20] (Flashback) aki**
Thank you so much!
**[18:21] (Flashback) gora**
Thank you for cheering me on.
**[18:23] (Flashback) gora**
Take care, you two.
**[18:25] (Flashback) haru**
Huh? You're leaving already?
**[18:27] (Flashback) gora**
I'm sorry, I have Yumoto...
**[18:29] (Flashback) gora**
I mean, I have a child waiting for me.
**[18:32] (Flashback) gora**
Take this.
**[18:33] (Flashback) gora**
It's a Bomb Rice Ball.
**[18:38] (Flashback) gora**
There's pickled plums, tuna mayo,
**[18:39] (Flashback) gora**
bonito flakes, hard-boiled egg, fried chicken
**[18:41] (Flashback) gora**
and vinegar-miso onions inside.
**[18:45] (Flashback) gora**
Make mischief if you must.
**[18:46] (Flashback) gora**
Just grow up big and strong!
**[18:51] (Flashback) aki**
I wish he could stay with us forever...
**[18:55] (Flashback) haru**
Yeah...
**[19:01] yu**
Big bro...
**[19:02] at**
Which means that long ago, Gora-san...
**[19:04] ryu**
As Maximum Gorar...
**[19:06] io**
...saved the Beppu Brothers?
**[19:11] en**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[19:16] at**
Tradition, tradition!
**[19:18] io**
We can't have a major plot twist
**[19:20] io**
without Yufuin-senpai shouting
"What did you say?!"
**[19:24] ryu**
That was a great "What did you say?!", too!
**[19:26] en**
Thank you tremendously for your praise.
**[19:28] haru**
Ruining our great story with
their snide comments...
**[19:32] aki**
They were unworthy both to hear
**[19:36] aki**
and know about our bond with Gora-san...
**[19:39] yu**
Hey, VEPP Brothers-san.
**[19:41] both**
It's VEPPer!
**[19:43] yu**
VEPPer-san, I'm glad you
like my brother so much,
**[19:47] yu**
but you shouldn't hate my
senpai because of that.
**[19:51] ryu**
Wrong, Yumoto.
**[19:54] ryu**
This is like a complicated
in-law relationship.
**[19:57] ryu**
"I like my husband, but
I hate my mother-in-law,
**[19:59] ryu**
and I hate my sister-in-law too."
**[20:02] io**
The whole "may have been a big brother to us"
**[20:04] io**
indicates a certain unhealthy attachment.
**[20:07] io**
Ryuu, you're surprisingly
proficient in psychology.
**[20:10] ryu**
Hey, don't say "surprisingly."
**[20:12] ryu**
Anyway, it's viscerally impossible
for them to get along with us.
**[20:16] ryu**
It defies logic.
**[20:18] aki**
Could you please stop psychoanalyzing us?
**[20:20] haru**
It's extremely aggravating, and creepy, too.
**[20:23] en**
No, no.
**[20:24] en**
I understand how you feel,
**[20:26] en**
but that's no reason to pester us.
**[20:29] at**
Yumoto and Gora-san are brothers.
**[20:31] at**
That's a fact that can't be changed.
**[20:33] en**
We may be the Battle Lovers,
**[20:35] en**
but if you don't stop stalking us, we're
willing to bring the authorities into this.
**[20:39] at**
What do you mean?
**[20:40] en**
Take them for arbitration or court,
or get a restraining order, perhaps.
**[20:45] wom**
Such graphic language from an
heir to the throne of love!
**[20:49] en**
If we can take this to a
higher authority, we should.
**[20:52] en**
All these battles are tiring me out.
**[20:53] at**
And bringing in a third party
should cut down on squabbling.
**[20:59] at**
Okay, we'll do that.
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[21:21] yu**
I'm so tired.
**[21:23] at**
I'm sorry your last big day at
Binan Land was such a waste.
**[21:28] yu**
Yeah...
**[21:29] ryu**
Don't be so sad.
**[21:30] ryu**
Memories are forever, right?
**[21:32] io**
That's right.
**[21:33] io**
Even all that nonsense today might
turn out to be a good memory.
**[21:36] io**
Maybe... possibly...
**[21:39] ryu**
Not convincing.
**[21:42] yu**
But yeah, you're right.
**[21:44] yu**
Let's take a bath and cheer ourselves up!
**[21:48] yu**
We're back, Bro Gora!
**[21:51] yu**
Big bro?
**[21:53] yu**
Huh?
**[21:54] yu**
He'd usually come right out with his axe...
**[22:01] en**
Gora-san disappeared with his
wood-chopping pile unfinished?
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love is What Matters
**[23:54] ryu**
Next time:
"Love is What Matters!"
**[23:56] ryu**
Love Making!
# 11 - Love is What Matters!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] yu**
--
**[00:00] dada**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] trio**
--
**[00:06] yu**
Big bro!
**[00:08] all**
Gora-san!
**[00:09] wom**
Gora-dono!
**[00:11] en**
Yoo-hoo...
**[00:13] en**
Doraemon...
**[00:21] at**
Gora-san?
**[00:25] at**
En-chan, what are you doing?
**[00:27] en**
Oh, I thought it might
have some sort of clue.
**[00:31] en**
Yeah, I'm lying.
**[00:32] en**
I just got curious.
**[00:35] en**
But look at this. It's Yumoto.
**[00:38] an**
Wow, he's tiny!
**[00:39] an**
And Gora-san's so young!
**[00:42] ryu**
What's all this?
**[00:43] ryu**
Wow, you're right!
**[00:44] ryu**
Yumoto hasn't changed at
all! He's exactly the same!
**[00:47] io**
And Gora-san looks like the
quintessential big brother!
**[00:53] yu**
Senpai. You need to take looking
for my brother seriously!
**[00:57] at**
Sorry, sorry.
**[00:59] at**
This was all just so charming.
**[01:01] en**
What is it about other people's
albums that's so fascinating?
**[01:05] yu**
Hey!
**[01:05] yu**
What will happen to the Kurotama
Bath if my brother disappears?!
**[01:10] yu**
What will I do?
**[01:12] yu**
If anything happens to my brother...
**[01:16] en**
Don't you worry.
**[01:18] en**
He'll be back.
**[01:20] wom**
Let us put our faith in Maximum Gorar!
**[01:23] at**
He's a legendary hero, remember?
**[01:25] at**
He'll be fine!
**[01:28] yu**
Big bro!
**[01:30] yu**
Come home!
***SIGN*** Love is What Matters!
**[02:19] (Flashback) aki**
You're being transferred
to the Andromeda branch?
**[02:22] (Flashback) dad**
Yeah.
**[02:23] (Flashback) dad**
For three to five years.
**[02:25] (Flashback) haru**
Is it a demotion?
**[02:26] (Flashback) dad**
They said it'll come
with a proper space wage.
**[02:28] (Flashback) haru**
Will we have to change schools?
**[02:30] (Flashback) aki**
What about your promise to take
us to Binan Land next month?
**[02:33] (Flashback) dad**
I'm sorry.
**[02:35] (Flashback) dad**
But there'll be plenty of
fun places in Andromeda.
**[02:39] (Flashback) both**
But is there Binan Land?!
**[02:51] (Flashback) haru**
We never even got to thank Gorar!
**[02:57] (Flashback) both**
I hate Andromeda!
***SIGN*** Space School
**[03:02] (Flashback) ali**
Earth?
**[03:04] (Flashback) ali**
Where's that?
**[03:05] (Flashback) ali**
Gotta be out in the sticks, right?
**[03:06] (Flashback) ali**
Oh, I know.
**[03:07] (Flashback) ali**
CIDE! That's where Gorar's from.
**[03:10] (Flashback) haru**
You know Maximum Gorar?
**[03:12] (Flashback) aki**
Why?
**[03:13] (Flashback) ali**
That Gorar guy really gets under my skin.
**[03:16] (Flashback) ali**
All he does is get in the way.
**[03:18] (Flashback) ali**
Man, Earth sucks.
**[03:19] (Flashback) ali**
I wish they'd bust it up soon.
**[03:21] (Flashback) ali**
But they gotta get rid of Gorar first!
**[03:24] (Flashback) ali**
Gorar's just a big doo-doo head!
***SIGN*** Teacher's Office
**[03:28] (Flashback) ali**
Picking a fight over some silly TV show?
**[03:33] (Flashback) haru**
*Gorar's not a bad guy...*
**[03:35] (Flashback) aki**
*Gorar's a hero!*
***SIGN*** Beppu Haruhiko Beppu Akihiko
**[03:59] (Flashback) haru**
This is stupid, right?
**[04:01] (Flashback) aki**
Yeah, it's stupid.
**[04:04] haru**
Gora-san...
**[04:05] aki**
Gora-san...
**[04:06] haru**
Isn't Gora-san charming?
**[04:08] haru**
I want to tie him up and
keep him beside me forever.
**[04:11] aki**
I want to force a reluctant
Gora-san to slap me.
**[04:17] aki**
Tie him up?
**[04:18] aki**
You mean Gora-san?
**[04:19] haru**
Yeah.
**[04:20] haru**
I don't want him running away.
**[04:21] haru**
But... slap you?
**[04:23] haru**
You want Gora-san to do that?
**[04:26] aki**
Yeah.
**[04:26] aki**
It sounds thrilling!
**[04:28] haru**
Aki, you've got weird tastes!
**[04:28] aki**
Haru, you've got strange tastes!
**[04:32] both**
Gora-san...
**[04:33] dada**
...belongs to VEPPer forever!
**[04:41] ari**
Kinshiro, how far have you gotten in
your Shakespeare research project?
**[04:45] kusa**
I finished last week.
**[04:47] ari**
Seriously?
**[04:48] ari**
I'd better hurry, too.
**[04:49] ari**
Mr. Chips is so strict.
**[04:51] gero**
You're so lucky.
**[04:53] gero**
I'm doing Latin grammar right now.
**[04:56] gero**
It's such a bother.
**[04:57] kusa**
If you can learn Latin now,
it will make things easier—
**[05:01] ari**
What's wrong?
**[05:03] kusa**
My shoelace broke.
**[05:04] gero**
Oh, dear...
**[05:05] ari**
Have you been looking after them?
**[05:07] kusa**
Of course.
**[05:09] kusa**
It's a bad omen.
**[05:11] gero**
Hey, a black cat.
**[05:16] gero**
Hey, cock robins.
**[05:45] kusa**
Something awful is about to happen.
**[05:47] ari**
Really?
**[05:49] ari**
I think it's all in your head.
**[05:50] kusa**
Not to me.
**[05:53] kusa**
I feel like something bad's
happening to At-chan.
**[05:56] ari**
Really?
**[05:57] ari**
If it's so bad you can't even
eat, why not send him an email?
**[06:02] kusa**
To send him an email...
for no particular reason?
**[06:05] ari**
Why not say, "Just felt like emailing
you, no particular reason"?
**[06:08] kusa**
What?
**[06:09] kusa**
Can I do that?
**[06:11] ari**
Why not?
**[06:18] kusa**
I'll email him, then.
***SIGN*** Just felt like emailing you, no particular reason. How are things? -Kinshiro.
***SIGN*** Sent
***SIGN*** Kinugawa Atsushi
**[06:24] [Messenger] sign**
Cell Phone
**[06:26] kusa**
I hope he'll reply soon...
**[06:39] ryu**
It's hard to relax without
Gora-san's regular 'cha-chop'!
**[06:44] wom**
Truly, we're missing the finishing touch!
**[06:46] io**
I wonder when he'll be back.
**[06:49] io**
If he's gotten mixed up
with the Beppu Brothers...
**[06:51] io**
I mean, VEPPer...
**[06:53] ryu**
Yeah.
**[06:54] ryu**
Maybe we should ask them directly?
**[06:56] io**
That's tricky...
**[07:00] en**
How'd it go?
**[07:01] at**
No use.
**[07:02] at**
Not a single sign of life.
**[07:04] ryu**
I told you not to turn it
on until it dried fully.
**[07:08] at**
I thought it was! I used a hair dryer on it!
**[07:12] io**
On the bright side, it didn't fall
in after you'd done your business.
**[07:17] at**
I didn't think I was so
dependent on my smartphone,
**[07:20] at**
but now I know how Yumoto feels.
**[07:23] at**
You don't realize how important
someone is until you lose them.
**[07:29] en**
You're equating Gora-san with a smartphone?
**[07:31] io**
Kinugawa-senpai's so traumatized,
**[07:33] io**
he's lost all his usual social graces.
**[07:35] ryu**
Yumoto forgot his cluelessness, too!
**[07:37] yu**
What was that?
**[07:42] dada**
Maximum Gorar is about to leave
the Earth, never to return!
**[07:48] dada**
Gorar is a space legend.
**[07:50] dada**
For the sake of his fans and
supporters who respect that legend,
**[07:53] dada**
he's going to connect in
friendship all over the cosmos
**[07:56] dada**
as an eternal member of VEPPer!
**[07:59] dada**
Heaven!
**[08:00] en**
Yeah, I lost the thread there.
**[08:01] en**
All the English threw me off.
**[08:04] wom**
In other words, they're taking Hakone Gora!
**[08:10] dada**
See you! Thank you! Bye!
**[08:30] dada**
What are you doing?
**[08:31] dada**
My office won't stand for this!
**[08:34] ryu**
They're surprisingly flimsy.
**[08:35] io**
Yeah.
**[08:36] io**
They must get holes in them all the time.
**[08:41] ryu**
Just one poke from any slightly
pointy household utensil...
**[08:44] ryu**
Chopsticks, for example...
**[08:51] dada**
I-I-I'm sorry!
**[08:54] at**
No need to apologize.
**[08:56] en**
So? Is Gora-san with them?
**[09:00] io**
And they're going back
into space with Gora-san?
**[09:05] ryu**
So what about the fight they
were trying to pick with us?
**[09:08] dada**
The original purpose of the fights
**[09:09] dada**
was to make it clear who
was more worthy of Gora-san!
**[09:14] at**
Really?
**[09:16] dada**
But they don't care anymore,
**[09:19] dada**
as long as Gora-san joins VEPPer!
**[09:23] [Messenger] sign**
Hakone Gora
Born May 9th
Blood Type O Taurus
Hobbies: Chopping Wood
Likes: His little brother
**[09:30] haru**
Yeah, Gora really should
be in the center, right?
**[09:33] aki**
Yeah.
**[09:34] aki**
Speaking of which, it'll
usually be the three of us,
**[09:38] aki**
but I was thinking of forming a new unit,
just me and Gora, called "Go Lucky!"
**[09:43] aki**
Gora + Aki = Go Lucky! Get it?
**[09:45] haru**
What the heck?
**[09:46] haru**
That's not fair! I want a unit, too!
**[09:48] aki**
No!
**[09:49] aki**
If we try to sell another unit
with the same name scheme,
**[09:52] aki**
it'll just dilute Gorar's value.
**[09:54] haru**
Then...
**[09:55] haru**
Then I want Gorar to live in my room with me!
**[09:58] aki**
Huh? We have a guest room!
**[10:01] haru**
No!
**[10:02] haru**
Gorar will need a roommate to help him adjust
**[10:04] haru**
to his new life and take care of him!
**[10:07] aki**
Haru, you toss and turn in your sleep!
**[10:09] aki**
You'll keep Gorar up all night!
**[10:11] haru**
You *talk in your sleep*, Aki!
**[10:18] en**
Ew.
**[10:25] yu**
Give back my brother Gora!
**[10:27] yu**
Hakone Gora is Hakone Gora!
**[10:30] yu**
He's no more and no less!
**[10:32] yu**
My brother Gora should be my brother Gora!
**[10:35] both**
We refuse.
**[10:36] aki**
Hakone Gora's true form is Maximum Gorar.
**[10:40] haru**
His deserves a position appropriate
to his unparalleled charisma!
**[10:44] en**
And what makes VEPPer so appropriate?
**[10:48] both**
Let us tell you!
**[10:50] haru**
Gorar is a hero!
**[10:52] aki**
VEPPer are idols!
**[10:54] both**
It's a natural fit!
**[10:56] ryu**
No, no. They're different.
**[10:58] ryu**
As different as gender-swap and BL.
**[11:00] io**
As different as compound and
fixed interest over six months.
**[11:04] dada**
Haru! Aki!
**[11:05] atu**
Hey, he peed—
**[11:07] dada**
We should leave this backwater planet
behind and take off right now!
**[11:12] haru**
Are you... moist?
**[11:15] dada**
I need to talk to the promoters
about the space concert tour!
**[11:18] dada**
Better get going!
**[11:21] at**
What's that? An earthquake?
**[11:23] wom**
No! This is...
**[11:25] wom**
The sound of space engines firing up!
**[11:29] all**
Space engines?!
**[11:30] wom**
Yes, the rocket engines of a ship
**[11:32] wom**
that flies through space using highly
advanced scientific technology!
**[11:39] yu**
I won't let Bro Gora go!
**[11:44] all**
Yumoto!
**[11:45] yu**
Scarlet Love Lumiere!
**[11:48] en**
Wait!
**[11:53] yu**
En-chan-senpai, why did you stop me?!
**[11:56] en**
Calm down, Yumoto!
**[11:57] en**
We have a right to fight for Gora-san, too.
**[12:01] at**
He's always been a good host
to us at the Kurotama Bath.
**[12:04] ryu**
That's important.
**[12:05] io**
We're here with you, Yumoto.
**[12:08] wom**
Everyone, for the sake of Gora-san,
transform into the Battle Lovers!
**[12:14] en**
This love-filled planet
**[12:16] en**
will not abide those who lack love!
**[12:18] ryu**
Those who wield loveless power
**[12:20] ryu**
must kneel before love!
**[12:22] io**
Love is power!
**[12:23] io**
Love is hope!
**[12:25] atsu**
Be born for love!
**[12:27] atsu**
Give your life for love!
**[12:29] yu**
Love!
**[12:29] yu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[12:32] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[12:34] yu**
Feel the power...
**[12:36] five**
...of love!
**[12:39] haru**
Too late.
**[12:40] haru**
You're the ones who said
you didn't want to fight.
**[12:43] aki**
You missed your chance.
**[12:44] aki**
Dadacha, take us home.
**[12:46] dada**
Well, you heard them.
**[12:48] dada**
You'd better get going.
**[12:50] dada**
If you don't,
**[12:51] dada**
I'll cast you into the vacuum of space!
**[12:55] en**
I'm really mad about how right they are.
**[12:57] at**
Though, agitating someone as much as you can
**[12:59] at**
then sweeping the rug out from under
them is a pretty common tactic.
**[13:02] io**
The effectiveness of that tactic...
**[13:04] ryu**
...is really getting under my skin.
**[13:08] yu**
Please!
**[13:10] yu**
Fight us!
**[13:12] dada**
This is...
**[13:13] dada**
That legendary tactic, total forthrightness?!
**[13:17] wom**
To refuse such an honest plea
**[13:20] wom**
would disgrace you both as idols and heroes!
**[13:23] wom**
What will you do?
**[13:24] haru**
A heartfelt gesture?
**[13:25] aki**
Cunning...
**[13:26] zun**
You must accept their offer!
**[13:29] io**
That voice came from Gora-san...
**[13:32] ryu**
Did he wake up?
**[13:33] ryu**
And he wants them to accept?
**[13:36] all**
You're...
**[13:37] zun**
Formerly head of TV Universe's programming
production department, section 2,
**[13:41] zun**
currently assistant head clerk-in-training
**[13:43] zun**
at TV Universe's historical
compilation office, copy division!
**[13:45] all**
Zundar!
**[13:47] dada**
Big bro!
**[13:48] all**
Big bro?!
**[13:50] zun**
Dear little brother, Dadacha!
**[13:51] zun**
I'm glad you're doing well!
**[13:54] dada**
You too, big bro!
**[13:55] dada**
I wasn't expecting you to
show up at a time like this!
**[13:59] zun**
Fortunately, given my current
position in the company,
**[14:01] zun**
it was easy to get vacation.
**[14:04] dada**
I got the box of detergents your
ex-wife's family sent during Bon!
**[14:09] zun**
Did you?
**[14:11] zun**
I haven't heard anything
from her lately at all...
**[14:14] dada**
I bet my nephews have all gotten big, too!
**[14:17] zun**
Yeah, the child support's
getting pretty rough.
**[14:20] ryu**
Huh?
**[14:21] ryu**
Didn't Zundar get demoted?
**[14:23] io**
And... they're brothers?
**[14:25] io**
They're not even the same species!
**[14:28] en**
"Copy clerk" sounds like a demotion to me.
**[14:30] at**
No, my biggest concern is
those serious family issues.
**[14:35] at**
Forget everything else!
**[14:37] wom**
That's right!
**[14:38] wom**
Forget everything else!
**[14:41] wom**
What happens here could
decide the fate of Earth!
**[14:46] zun**
My beloved little brother and
beloved Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[14:50] zun**
Now is the time for you to show
your glory to the universe!
**[14:54] haru**
Dadacha.
**[14:55] haru**
Who is this guy?
**[14:57] aki**
A porcupine?
**[14:58] zun**
On one side, the ones who ruined my TV show,
CIDE 2, and consigned it to the cancellation bin...
**[15:02] zun**
the Earth Defense Club!
**[15:04] zun**
The ones who had Chief Hireashi
sent to the DVD pressing factory,
**[15:07] zun**
and I, Zundar, to a do-nothing
job... the Battle Lovers!
**[15:12] zun**
And on the other side, the space idols
with an album currently on sale,
**[15:15] zun**
the VEPPer!
**[15:16] zun**
What brings them together?
**[15:18] zun**
Maximum Gorar of CIDE 1!
**[15:20] zun**
It's a beyond-thrilling development!
**[15:23] dada**
Big bro!
**[15:23] dada**
You're wonderful! Huggles!
**[15:26] ryu**
It's a little weird for him to label
it "beyond-thrilling" himself.
**[15:29] at**
Well, that's TV people for you.
**[15:32] zun**
This will bring big ratings for sure!
**[15:34] zun**
And this project will return me
to the programming department!
**[15:38] en**
Atsushi, tell him he's really counting
his chickens before they hatch.
**[15:42] at**
No, he's really psyched himself up.
**[15:44] at**
I would feel bad letting him
know the real story now.
**[15:47] yu**
I don't care about reasons or projects...
**[15:51] yu**
As long as you wake Bro Gora up safely!
**[15:55] haru**
This guy really does get under my skin.
**[15:57] aki**
I'd love to see him cry.
**[15:59] dada**
Good!
**[16:00] dada**
Now's the time!
**[16:02] zun**
Three, two, one, cue!
**[16:15] dada**
*Ladies and gentlemen!*
**[16:18] dada**
*Welcome to the amazing show!*
**[16:21] dada**
This is Idol Battle!
**[16:24] dada**
We're about to witness a
fierce and beautiful battle
**[16:27] dada**
for the title of #1 idols on Earth!
**[16:33] dada**
Will it be VEPPer or the Battle Lovers?
**[16:36] dada**
You're the ones who will decide!
**[16:38] dada**
Please use the "Like" button
on your remote control at home!
**[16:47] dada**
If the coin comes up Dadacha,
VEPPer will go first!
**[16:49] dada**
If it comes up Wombat, the
Battle Lovers will go first!
**[16:57] dada**
VEPPer goes first!
**[17:00] en**
Don't you think it's strange, Atsushi?
**[17:03] at**
How so?
**[17:04] en**
In games, usually going second
gives you the advantage, right?
**[17:07] at**
You're right!
**[17:08] at**
Especially at music recitals
and figure skating
**[17:10] at**
and other performance-based competitions.
**[17:14] en**
But when they learned they were
going first, they grinned.
**[17:26] dada**
Welcome to the VEPP theater!
**[17:29] dada**
I'm proud to introduce
**[17:31] dada**
that marvelous duo, the VEPPer!
**[17:36] dada**
Now's the time!
**[17:37] dada**
Enjoy the show!
**[17:43] dada**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[17:50] dada**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[17:53] dada**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[18:03] dada**
*VEPPer, bringing a thrill
to this blue planet!*
**[18:10] dada**
*Let's illuminate the entire world!*
**[18:12] both**
The twin stars shining in the heavens!
**[18:13] dada**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[18:14] haru**
Salty Sol!
**[18:16] aki**
Melty Luna!
**[18:18] both**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[18:24] both**
*There's a shining light*
**[18:27] both**
*I won't let anyone else have*
**[18:30] both**
*A pure, great revolution*
**[18:33] both**
*Destiny! Fantasy! Galaxy!*
**[18:36] all**
Like! Like! Like!
**[18:40] voice**
Like!
**[18:47] io**
What's going on here?!
**[18:49] zun**
The audience's "Likes" become
attacks against their opponent!
**[18:52] wom**
A truly formidable advanced
scientific technology...
**[18:56] at**
There's too many!
**[18:58] en**
Don't shave down our HP
with these piddling things!
**[19:00] aki**
Maximum Gorar!
**[19:02] aki**
You were our light of hope!
**[19:04] haru**
We don't care if the Earth goes away!
**[19:06] haru**
As long as we have you, that's all we need!
**[19:08] aki**
Rather, we wish it *would* go away!
**[19:11] aki**
Because then, we could be together forever!
**[19:17] ryu**
A thrilling twist...
**[19:19] ryu**
or rather, a stalkery one!
**[19:20] io**
I can't move!
**[19:22] en**
I didn't think they'd have a
system like this in place...
**[19:24] at**
It's wearing me down both
emotionally and physically!
**[19:27] yu**
My brother...
**[19:28] yu**
I know he's Earth's hero!
**[19:31] yu**
And I know that sometimes he would prioritize
**[19:33] yu**
being a hero over being my brother...
**[19:36] yu**
But... But...
**[19:38] yu**
I don't want to lose him
to something like this!
**[19:42] aki**
The three of us will make
a new world together!
**[19:45] aki**
And you can join us there!
**[20:07] dada**
VEPPer received a surge of likes!
**[20:10] dada**
Oh?
**[20:11] dada**
Have the Battle Lovers
lost their will to fight?
**[20:13] dada**
If they don't stand up
before the count of five,
**[20:15] dada**
they'll forfeit the competition,
**[20:17] dada**
and the VEPPer will win by default!
**[20:21] dada**
Five!
**[20:22] dada**
Four!
**[20:23] dada**
Three!
**[20:24] three**
Hold it!
**[20:30] at**
Kin-chan?!
**[20:31] en**
They surprised me.
**[20:32] en**
What are they doing here?
**[20:33] at**
That's right. What about your study abroad?
**[20:35] kusa**
When you didn't respond to the email I sent,
**[20:38] kusa**
I knew something was wrong.
**[20:39] ari**
I've never had a faster trip home.
**[20:43] gero**
You certainly are magnets
for trouble, aren't you?
**[20:46] ryu**
What was that?
**[20:53] gero**
Well, well.
**[20:54] gero**
So you're not completely down!
**[20:55] io**
And you three appear to
have nothing better to do!
**[20:58] ari**
So?
**[20:59] ari**
What's the show this time?
**[21:01] zun**
It's been some time, Caerula Adamas!
**[21:04] trio**
Zundar!
**[21:05] zun**
That's *Lord* Zundar, to you!
**[21:09] kusa**
We are no longer
**[21:11] kusa**
the kind of men who will follow you blindly.
**[21:14] zun**
Oh? You intend to defy me?
**[21:17] kusa**
If following the path we have chosen
**[21:19] kusa**
in a way you don't like
is the same as defiance,
**[21:22] kusa**
then let it be so!
**[21:24] zun**
Then prove to me that willingness
with your own blood!
**[21:28] dada**
That's my big bro! Everything
he says is so cool!
**[21:32] en**
Yeah.
**[21:33] en**
That *is* a more profound statement
**[21:34] en**
than I'd expect from a papa
porcupine with child support woes.
**[21:38] zun**
D-D-Do not speak of my children!
**[21:43] at**
En-chan!
**[21:48] kusa**
Conquest!
**[21:53] kusa**
The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
**[21:56] kusa**
Aurite!
**[22:00] ari**
The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
**[22:03] ari**
Argent!
**[22:07] gero**
The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
**[22:10] gero**
Perlite!
**[22:12] trio**
We are the rulers of this blue world...
**[22:15] trio**
Caerula Adamas!
***SIGN*** Next Time
***SIGN*** Love Will Save the Earth!
**[23:54] yu**
Next time,
"Love Will Save the Earth!"
**[23:57] yu**
Love Making!
**[23:58] ---**
# 12 - Love Will Save the Earth!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] both**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] io**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] aki**
--
**[00:04] trio**
Hold it!
**[00:08] dada**
My, my!
**[00:09] dada**
I believe this is what's
known as a "Dream Match"!
**[00:12] dada**
*Yesterday's enemies become today's allies!*
**[00:15] dada**
* Conquest Club, will you sing for the Earth*
* Defense Club?!*
**[00:19] kusa**
Don't be stupid.
**[00:20] kusa**
We would never take part
in such a ridiculous farce!
**[00:23] dada**
What...?
**[00:25] both**
What a twist!
***SIGN*** At last, the idol battle begins!
***SIGN*** Who will win? The Beppu Brothers or the Defense Club?
***SIGN*** What is the truth behind the Galaxy Idols?
***SIGN*** And will love save the Earth?!
***SIGN*** Love Will Save the Earth!
**[01:18] kusa**
We, the Binan High School
Student Council, do not sing.
**[01:21] kusa**
But if you attempt to bring harm
to students from our school,
**[01:26] kusa**
we will not hesitate to fight you!
**[01:28] ari**
If the president says so...
**[01:30] gero**
If the president and vice president say so...
**[01:33] yu**
We're okay now!
**[01:35] yu**
We can do it ourselves.
**[01:37] ari**
Really?
**[01:38] yu**
While you guys and our
Senpai were buying time,
**[01:41] yu**
our HP recovered!
**[01:43] wom**
The Battle Lover suits' highly
advanced scientific technology
**[01:47] wom**
is mounted with a self-repair system
powered by the placebo effect!
**[01:52] en**
Wait, that means it's all in our heads, right?
**[01:55] yu**
Which means it's our turn to sing!
**[01:57] en**
You're kidding.
**[01:58] atsu**
It's either that or a smackdown.
**[02:01] ryu**
I'd rather sing.
**[02:02] io**
Same.
**[02:03] yu**
Then let's do it!
**[02:05] yu**
Our Earth Defense Club song!
**[02:11] all**
*No matter how times we fall,
we'll just get back up!*
**[02:16] all**
*Just as the sun rises from the ground!*
**[02:27] voices**
Like! Like! Like!
**[02:33] voices**
*I make thoughtless mistakes.*
**[02:35] voices**
*I let chances slip away.*
**[02:38] voices**
*But whenever that happens...*
**[02:41] voices**
*I hear a voice!*
**[02:43] haru**
They're getting likes?!
**[02:46] aki**
They have no sense of pitch or tempo...
**[02:48] aki**
You have to be kidding!
**[02:51] aki**
Gorar-san is...
**[02:52] aki**
waking up?
**[02:55] haru**
He didn't show any reaction to our singing...
**[02:58] aki**
Yet this pitiful performance...
**[03:00] aki**
Is it impossible for us to beat a bond
between brothers, no matter what we do?
**[03:26] hashi**
Hey, you.
**[03:28] hashi**
Did you have pasta with meat sauce for lunch?
**[03:31] gora**
Eh? Lunch?
**[03:32] gora**
No, mabo tofu.
**[03:35] gora**
From a pouch.
**[03:36] hashi**
Oh, I see.
**[03:38] hashi**
There's a stain on your shirt,
so I assumed it was meat sauce.
**[03:43] gora**
Do you enjoy meat sauce?
**[03:46] hashi**
It's fine.
**[03:47] hashi**
Actually, I dislike it.
**[03:49] hashi**
It's all crumbly, so it's
hard for me to eat it all.
**[03:52] goro**
I... can imagine.
**[04:00] hashi**
Do you enjoy chopping wood?
**[04:03] gora**
Oh, yes.
**[04:04] gora**
I do enjoy it quite a lot.
**[04:12] hashi**
Would you like to fight?
**[04:16] hashi**
I'm looking for someone who will fight.
**[04:21] hashi**
Well, would you give it a try, at least?
**[04:36] gor**
H-Hang on here!
**[04:48] gor**
Wh-Why...?
**[04:49] hashi**
You're cut out to be a hero, you know?
**[04:53] hashi**
What?
**[04:54] hashi**
You're cut out to be a hero.
**[04:59] gora**
Am I, really?
**[05:01] hashi**
*I've found my villain!*
**[05:04] gora**
*Huh?!*
**[05:05] hashi**
*You are my villain!*
**[05:09] gora**
*Ha, thought so!*
**[05:11] gora**
Medicine to make Earthlings smarter?
**[05:15] gora**
I'll never let you add
that to the water supply!
**[05:17] gora**
Earthlings gotta be dumb! Dumbasses for life!
**[05:21] gora**
An educational radio broadcast? On Earth?
**[05:24] gora**
Get that crap outta here!
**[05:27] gora**
I'll put a stop to all your good deeds!
**[05:35] gora**
Earthlings don't need to go to school!
**[05:39] gora**
Keep 'em stuck on Earth forever, dickcheese!
**[05:42] both**
Wait!
**[05:43] haru**
What's with this recording?
**[05:45] haru**
The dialogue and the images
don't match up at all!
**[05:48] aki**
Dumbass? Dickcheese?
**[05:49] aki**
Gorar would never use such filthy language!
**[05:52] haru**
This isn't anything like the
broadcast version, either!
**[05:55] aki**
This reedit is completely lacking in taste!
**[05:57] en**
Excuse me. Question.
**[05:59] en**
You VEPPer guys are Earthlings, right?
**[06:02] both**
We're Earthlings just like Gorar!
**[06:04] en**
Wasn't CIDE broadcast on TV Universe?
**[06:07] zun**
Indeed it was!
**[06:09] en**
If CIDE 1 wasn't broadcast on Earth,
**[06:12] en**
how do you know what happened in it?
**[06:14] both**
We saw it in space.
**[06:16] atsu**
How?
**[06:17] haru**
Like anyone does.
**[06:18] aki**
On TV.
**[06:19] io**
But it's the TV that we're wondering about...
**[06:22] ryu**
What's the story?
**[06:27] (Flashback) haru**
Gorar!
**[06:28] (Flashback) aki**
Don't worry, Haru.
**[06:29] (Flashback) aki**
Gorar never loses!
**[06:30] (Flashback) haru**
Y-Yeah.
**[06:32] (Flashback) haru**
You're right!
**[06:34] (Flashback) both**
Fight, Maximum Gorar!
**[06:37] (Flashback) gora**
*Wood-Chopping Beam!*
**[06:39] (Flashback) both**
Yeah!
**[06:42] en**
Hang on.
**[06:43] en**
There are so many things I have
to question. Too many things.
**[06:48] atsu**
What was your father's job, exactly?
**[06:49] en**
Yes! That was my question!
**[06:51] aki**
That is not the issue here!
**[06:53] haru**
We decided to support Gorar.
**[06:56] haru**
To keep on supporting him no matter what!
**[07:01] gor**
Send whatever you want.
**[07:03] gor**
I shall protect the Earth!
***SIGN*** Can I Destroy Earth? will be airing
its final episode next week.
**[07:06] both**
Cancelled?!
**[07:08] ari**
That's right.
**[07:08] ari**
I believe we've heard this
story before, haven't we?
**[07:12] gero**
As I recall, no matter how many times
they attacked, they couldn't beat Gorar.
**[07:16] gero**
And then...
**[07:17] zun**
Something unanticipated happened.
**[07:23] (Flashback) ali**
Haruhiko. Akihito.
**[07:26] (Flashback) ali**
I heard CIDE's ending.
**[07:28] (Flashback) haru**
What, and now you're glad you don't have
to watch such a dumb show anymore, right?
**[07:32] (Flashback) aki**
Thank you for your worthless opinion.
**[07:35] (Flashback) ali**
Nah, it's not that.
**[07:37] (Flashback) ali**
I think I'm gonna miss it.
**[07:40] (Flashback) ali**
I was just starting to think...
**[07:42] (Flashback) ali**
Gorar was pretty stubborn, and
really strong, and kinda cool.
**[07:47] (Flashback) ali**
That's all.
**[07:48] (Flashback) ali**
Later.
**[07:50] zun**
Although Gorar was meant to be a villain,
**[07:52] zun**
he amassed surprising popularity.
**[07:55] zun**
The higher-ups saw their
plans going off the rails,
**[07:57] zun**
and decided to cancel the show.
**[08:00] (Flashback) haru**
Your stay's being extended?!
**[08:01] (Flashback) aki**
You said we'd be going back right away!
**[08:05] (Flashback) haru**
Our dad's a liar.
**[08:08] (Flashback) aki**
I wonder how Gorar's doing...
**[08:10] (Flashback) haru**
Did they really stop sending monsters?
**[08:13] (Flashback) haru**
I hope the Earth's really okay...
**[08:15] (Flashback) aki**
The show's been canceled,
**[08:17] (Flashback) aki**
and TV Universe probably doesn't
have the budget to keep it up.
**[08:20] (Flashback) haru**
I wonder why they canceled it...
**[08:22] (Flashback) aki**
But if it's canceled, that means
Gorar won't have to fight anymore.
**[08:27] (Flashback) haru**
I know that!
**[08:28] (Flashback) haru**
It's not that I like
watching Gorar get hurt...
**[08:32] (Flashback) aki**
Really?
**[08:34] (Flashback) aki**
You can be pretty selfish sometimes, Haru.
**[08:36] (Flashback) haru**
And you can say some pretty
nasty things sometimes, Aki.
**[08:43] (Flashback) both**
Let's stop it.
**[08:44] (Flashback) aki**
We're just lonely.
**[08:47] (Flashback) aki**
Because we miss Gorar.
**[08:49] (Flashback) haru**
We can't cheer him on anymore.
**[08:51] (Flashback) aki**
And we never got to thank him for
that first time at Binan Land.
**[08:55] (Flashback) haru**
"Make mischief if you must.
**[08:56] (Flashback) haru**
Just grow up big and strong," he said.
**[08:58] (Flashback) haru**
I wonder if we're doing a good job?
**[09:00] (Flashback) aki**
We are.
**[09:02] (Flashback) aki**
I'm sure if Gorar saw us, he'd be proud.
**[09:05] (Flashback) haru**
I hope you're right.
**[09:09] (Flashback) haru**
Yeah.
**[09:10] (Flashback) haru**
I wish Gorar could see us now...
**[09:14] (Flashback) dada**
No problem!
**[09:16] (Flashback) haru**
Yuck!
**[09:19] (Flashback) dada**
Yes! I just knew you had talent!
**[09:23] (Flashback) dada**
You Beppu Brothers are the only ones who
could ever swat the great Dadacha out of the air!
**[09:27] (Flashback) aki**
A flying squirrel?!
**[09:28] (Flashback) dada**
A dwarf flying squirrel!
**[09:30] (Flashback) dada**
More precisely,
**[09:31] (Flashback) dada**
I am a dwarf flying squirrel-like alien
**[09:33] (Flashback) dada**
who closely resembles one of your
Earth dwarf flying squirrels.
**[09:35] (Flashback) haru**
You're calling *yourself* a dwarf
flying squirrel-like alien?
**[09:38] (Flashback) aki**
I think he flew into our house by accident.
**[09:40] (Flashback) aki**
Let's let him out, like a rhinoceros beetle.
**[09:44] (Flashback) dada**
Wait! Listen to me!
**[09:46] (Flashback) dada**
You want to meet Gorar, don't you?
**[09:49] (Flashback) aki**
Did you say Gorar?
**[09:50] (Flashback) dada**
I did, I did!
**[09:51] (Flashback) dada**
Yes, I did!
**[09:52] (Flashback) haru**
I don't care what kind of
flying squirrel you are,
**[09:55] (Flashback) haru**
if you're using Gorar's name to jerk
us around, we'll tear out your fur.
**[09:59] (Flashback) dada**
Cut it out!
**[10:00] (Flashback) dada**
I've got a good deal for you!
**[10:01] (Flashback) dada**
With Maximum Gorar retired,
**[10:04] (Flashback) dada**
the only option is for *you* to go on TV!
**[10:07] (Flashback) haru**
What?
**[10:08] (Flashback) haru**
I don't understand.
**[10:09] (Flashback) dada**
Just as you saw Gorar on TV,
**[10:13] (Flashback) dada**
if you went on TV, Gorar
would be the one to see *you*!
**[10:17] (Flashback) aki**
But CIDE was canceled...
**[10:19] (Flashback) dada**
So we need a new angle.
**[10:21] (Flashback) dada**
Idols!
**[10:22] (Flashback) both**
Idols?!
**[10:24] (Flashback) dada**
Idols can be on music shows, of course,
but also variety shows and dramas!
**[10:27] (Flashback) dada**
Idols can do anything!
**[10:29] (Flashback) dada**
This time, you'll be the ones to reach him!
**[10:32] dada**
And on that day, VEPPer was born!
**[10:37] haru**
Bimbos like you wouldn't understand the
rigors of show business, of course.
**[10:42] aki**
We had to go on tour.
**[10:43] aki**
And sell ourselves.
**[10:44] haru**
We had to humble ourselves to
some deeply unpleasant people.
**[10:46] haru**
Because it was the only way to get to Gorar.
**[10:50] aki**
And at last, we broke through.
**[10:51] aki**
And just when we thought
we might get our own show,
**[10:54] aki**
a certain TV program started.
**[10:56] aki**
What do you think it was?
**[10:58] gero**
Was it, oh, the one we were on? CIDE 2?
**[11:02] aki**
Yes. The pathetic Conquest Club.
**[11:05] aki**
The idiotic Earth Defense Club.
**[11:08] haru**
And what annoyed us even more was
that CIDE 2 was popular in the end!
**[11:12] en**
Okay, but it's not like we
knew we were on a TV show.
**[11:16] en**
It was just Atsushi and Kusatsu's
little lovers' quarrel anyway.
**[11:19] both**
Don't call it a lovers' quarrel!
**[11:20] en**
Then what should I call it?
**[11:22] io**
A miscommunication?
**[11:24] ryu**
A misunderstanding?
**[11:25] gero**
A misapprehension?
**[11:26] ari**
Could we have a little less
talk from the second-year trio?
**[11:29] ari**
Kinshiro's about to die
of humiliation over here.
**[11:32] kusa**
Am not!
**[11:33] haru**
Dammit!
**[11:34] haru**
These idiots beat us...
**[11:35] haru**
Are the general public stupid?
**[11:36] haru**
Are they just stupid?!
**[11:37] aki**
We were supposed to return home
as Earth's first top space idols.
**[11:42] aki**
And we would have, if not for you!
**[11:44] wom**
And that's why you challenged
the Battle Lovers to a fight,
**[11:46] wom**
even though they're Earthlings like you?
**[11:50] haru**
That's right!
**[11:51] haru**
We will crush you!
**[11:52] aki**
We won't even allow you
the dignity of existing!
**[11:59] [Messenger] sign**
Wood-Chopping Warrior
Maximum Gorar
Finishing Move: Wood-Chopping Beam
Super Wood-Chopping Axe
**[12:05] wom**
Is it time for the smackdown?!
**[12:06] dada**
Wait!
**[12:07] dada**
Galaxy Idols aren't allowed to get in fights!
**[12:11] haru**
Idols aren't so limited!
**[12:13] haru**
Everyone expects us to have
a scuffle or two nowadays!
**[12:17] aki**
Have you ever been forced to do a show
**[12:19] aki**
where the writing was absolute crap!?
**[12:23] haru**
Fans who seem devoted,
**[12:25] haru**
then turn on you when you
don't match your image...
**[12:28] aki**
Incompetent producers who think only of
protecting and promoting themselves...
**[12:32] haru**
Those are the realities
we weathered to get here!
**[12:34] aki**
You think you can compare with us?!
**[12:37] kusa**
At-chan!
**[12:38] yu**
Stay back, Kin-chan-senpai!
**[12:41] yu**
You student council guys just watch!
**[12:43] yu**
This battle is between the
Earth Defense Club and VEPPer!
**[12:47] kusa**
But...
**[12:48] atsu**
Yumoto's right.
**[12:49] atsu**
I think we actually need to fight this one.
**[12:52] en**
Rising to the challenge and all that.
**[12:55] io**
Just as investment requires
ethics and vision,
**[12:57] io**
a life requires style.
**[13:00] ryu**
In other words, this is
where we show our stuff.
**[13:04] haru**
After you avoided us and looked
down on us so many times?
**[13:08] haru**
So you really *do* sing a different
tune when Gora-san's involved!
**[13:10] aki**
I knew it, but it's still irritating.
**[13:12] aki**
As people who worked our fingers
to the bone to become idols...
**[13:15] yu**
Is being an idol really that hard?
**[13:19] haru**
You bet it is!
**[13:21] yu**
If the fun parts don't outweigh the
hard parts, I think that's wrong!
**[13:25] aki**
Are you stupid?
**[13:26] aki**
That's mere idealism!
**[13:28] aki**
Look at reality!
**[13:30] yu**
I'm having fun in the Defense Club.
**[13:32] yu**
And in the Battle Lovers, too!
**[13:34] yu**
I think it's amazing to
knuckle down and work hard,
**[13:37] yu**
but won't that eventually
lead you to a dead end?
**[13:39] yu**
It's wonderful to do stuff for
some person or some goal, too...
**[13:44] yu**
But in the end, doesn't it come
down to whether you like it or not?
**[13:48] haru**
You make me sick!
**[13:50] haru**
Losers, stand aside!
**[13:52] aki**
We aim for the top!
**[13:54] ryu**
Who are you calling losers?
**[13:55] io**
I'd like you to amend that statement!
**[13:57] haru**
I don't think so!
**[13:58] both**
Sure-Kill Thundering Comet!
**[14:02] en**
Ryuu!
**[14:03] atsu**
Io!
**[14:04] yu**
Doing something to be better than
others is the dumbest thing there is!
**[14:08] yu**
I'd rather have people say
"he sucks, but I like him"
**[14:10] yu**
or "he's awkward, but I like him."
**[14:13] yu**
If someone told me they liked
me because I'm the best...
**[14:15] yu**
I'd hate that!
**[14:16] aki**
Stop dreaming!
**[14:17] haru**
Being an idol is a business!
**[14:19] haru**
The business of giving dreams to others!
**[14:21] yu**
But is there love there?!
**[14:24] both**
No!
**[14:25] all**
What?!
**[14:28] wom**
A complete repudiation of love?!
**[14:30] kusa**
They're still capable of
pushing back against Hakone Yumoto?
**[14:33] haru**
What idols need aren't dreams, but lies!
**[14:36] aki**
You trick people, deceive them, entice them.
**[14:39] aki**
That's what it means...
**[14:41] both**
...to be an idol!
**[14:45] haru**
Everything we've done has been for Gorar-san!
**[14:48] aki**
All of it for this day!
**[14:50] haru**
We belong to Gorar-san...
**[14:53] aki**
And Gorar-san belongs to us!
**[14:58] yu**
Bro!
**[14:59] yu**
Bro!
**[15:01] aki**
You, who speak only in platitudes...
**[15:03] haru**
...are weaker than us, who
act in pure self-interest!
**[15:06] aki**
Feeling always triumphs...
**[15:08] haru**
...over reason!
**[15:11] yu**
Bro!
**[15:25] (Flashback) yu**
Big bro?
**[15:28] yu**
Big bro!
**[15:36] yu**
Yumoto?
**[15:38] aki**
Haru! Don't falter!
**[15:40] haru**
I'm not faltering!
**[15:44] atsu**
What were you thinking, VEPPer?
**[15:46] io**
What do you mean?
**[15:48] atsu**
If it's a contest of feelings,
**[15:49] atsu**
Yumoto's are going to be
stronger than VEPPer's.
**[15:51] en**
Overwhelmingly so.
**[15:53] en**
Talk about a miscalculation...
**[15:56] yu**
No! Bro! Come back to me!
**[16:04] kusa**
What we're seeing...
**[16:05] kusa**
The souls of the Hakone Yumoto of the present
**[16:06] kusa**
and the Hakone Yumoto of the past are
resonating with each other across space-time?
**[16:10] en**
Yumoto!
**[16:11] en**
Calm down!
**[16:12] atsu**
He's losing himself to his fear!
**[16:14] io**
You mean he's out of control?
**[16:15] ryu**
Dammit, what are you doing, you idiot?!
**[16:19] wom**
Y-Y-Yumoto-san!
**[16:22] yu**
Big bro! Where are you?!
**[16:25] haru**
H-He's...
**[16:26] ari**
Unbelievable!
**[16:30] yu**
I'm taking back my brother!
**[16:35] yu**
Ultimate...
**[16:36] yu**
Love...
**[16:38] yu**
Attack!
**[16:39] en**
Yumoto!
**[16:39] atsu**
Yumoto!
**[16:39] both**
Yumoto!
**[16:44] ryu**
Stop it, Yumoto!
**[16:45] io**
You mustn't!
**[16:46] en**
Don't forget the true nature of love!
**[16:48] atsu**
Yumoto!
**[16:48] atsu**
What is love?
**[16:51] en**
Answer us, Yumoto!
**[16:56] yu**
I...
**[16:57] ryu**
Stupid Yumoto!
**[16:58] io**
Really.
**[16:59] io**
We have such a troublesome kouhai among us.
**[17:02] atsu**
Get a grip. I mean it.
**[17:04] en**
Don't forget, your brother Gora
isn't the only one in your life.
**[17:06] en**
You have all of us, too.
**[17:08] yu**
I'm sorry, Senpai.
**[17:11] yu**
I was alone in the dark,
with the cold wind blowing,
**[17:16] yu**
when I heard your voices...
**[17:18] yu**
I understand now.
**[17:20] yu**
The "Ai" in "Idol"
**[17:22] yu**
is the "Ai" of Love!
**[17:26] gero**
Is he going berserk again?
**[17:27] ari**
No, it's something else!
**[17:39] kusa**
Th-This is...
**[17:41] wom**
This is the Ultra More-Better Version!
**[17:44] zun**
Not again!
**[17:46] yu**
To me, idols are people I feel
better just having around!
**[17:52] yu**
Just knowing they're there
makes me feel stronger.
**[17:55] yu**
Just like En-chan-senpai and Atsushi-senpai
**[17:58] yu**
and Io-senpai and Ryuu-senpai!
**[18:02] yu**
That's what my brother was to
you, right, Brothers-senpai?
**[18:06] yu**
And if you're an idol yourself,
**[18:08] yu**
I think you should want to make
the people around you happy!
**[18:12] yu**
As many people as possible!
**[18:13] en**
The spiral of love...
**[18:15] atsu**
Of loving and being loved...
**[18:16] io**
It continues onward...
**[18:18] ryu**
For eternity!
**[18:19] yu**
That is the "ai" of idols!
**[18:24] all**
Ultra True Love Attack!
**[18:53] gora**
Yumoto?
**[18:54] gora**
Is something the matter?
**[18:56] gora**
Are you sick to your stomach again?
**[18:58] yu**
No, I'm okay.
**[19:00] gora**
I see.
**[19:02] gora**
I was having a dream.
**[19:05] yu**
What was it?
**[19:06] yu**
Tell me, big bro.
**[19:08] gora**
It was a dream about many
people I met long ago,
**[19:11] gora**
when I did many things.
**[19:16] gora**
Oh?
**[19:17] gora**
You two...
**[19:19] gora**
Are you the children from Binan Land?
**[19:22] haru**
Gorar?
**[19:23] aki**
How could you tell?
**[19:26] gora**
How?
**[19:27] gora**
You were in my dream, too.
**[19:33] haru**
Why?
**[19:34] aki**
Why do you have to address us
when we're at our most pathetic?
**[19:39] gora**
Pathetic?
**[19:40] gora**
How?
**[19:41] gora**
You've grown so big and strong.
**[19:46] gora**
You kept your promise to Gorar, didn't you?
**[19:49] gora**
I'm happy.
**[19:54] gora**
What's all this?
**[19:56] gora**
What's wrong, you two?
**[20:01] gora**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[20:08] gora**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[20:11] gora**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[20:15] haru**
Thanks for listening to us
all the way to the end!
**[20:17] aki**
We're so happy to know that
our songs can help you!
**[20:22] haru**
To be honest, VEPPer has been through a lot,
and we've had a lot of setbacks lately.
**[20:26] haru**
But now we understand what it is
that we really love to do!
**[20:30] aki**
We're grateful to the
people who taught us that.
**[20:33] aki**
And we love you, Beppu Apes!
**[20:43] en**
So?
**[20:43] kusa**
So what?
**[20:45] en**
Well, any stories?
**[20:47] kusa**
No.
**[20:48] en**
Oh, come on.
**[20:49] en**
You had fun, right?
**[20:52] kusa**
Did we?
**[20:53] ari**
It was pretty standard.
**[20:54] gero**
Well, there was that one interesting thing.
**[20:56] gero**
Jellied eels.
**[20:58] ryu**
Whatted whats?
**[20:58] io**
It's a local dish.
**[21:00] ryu**
Eel should be done kabayaki style!
**[21:02] gero**
I don't know why you expect me to defend it.
**[21:04] ryu**
Boy, do you suck.
**[21:06] atsu**
Did they have hot baths?
**[21:08] kusa**
No, just shower booths.
**[21:10] ari**
They looked a bit like toilets,
all lined up in a row.
**[21:14] en**
See? That's interesting.
**[21:16] en**
Tell us more stuff like that.
**[21:18] yu**
But at the end of the day,
soaking in a hot bath is the best.
**[21:21] en**
There goes Yumoto, jumping to philosophy.
**[21:23] atsu**
But I think I understand what he means.
**[21:26] wom**
It's the bath that makes the Earth
Defense Club what it is, right?
**[21:31] yu**
Yeah!
**[21:32] yu**
And...
**[21:34] yu**
We have new members, too!
**[21:36] both**
Yeah...
**[21:37] yu**
And now we're all together!
**[21:40] yu**
But...
**[21:40] yu**
I feel like someone's missing.
**[21:42] wom**
Erk!
**[21:44] en**
Gora-san's chopping wood, right?
**[21:45] atsu**
Zundar and Dadacha went
back to space together...
**[21:49] atsu**
So who could it be?
**[21:50] io**
Good question...
***SIGN*** Important news after the break!
***SIGN***
***SIGN*** Mr. Tawarayama was once again brought back to life thanks to the "life" brought to Earth by one of Wombat's people. Thank goodness.
***SIGN***
# Season 3
# 1 - Untitled
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:21] yu**
By the way... About Mr. Tawarayama...
**[00:25] yu**
What do you think?
**[00:26] atsu**
About what?
**[00:27] yu**
He came back to life.
**[00:28] ryu**
Right, he did. This is
the second time, right?
**[00:32] naru**
Actually, I believe he revived
during our summer vacation, too...
**[00:35] yu**
Until our Love Attack—
**[00:37] atsu**
Don't say it!
**[00:39] atsu**
So, what were you saying
about Mr. Tawarayama?
**[00:43] yu**
That alien... What was it again?
**[00:45] ryu**
Wom-san's weird friend...
**[00:48] naru**
The mulberry-colored naked
mole rat-looking thing?
**[00:50] yu**
Yeah, that naked mall rat thing...
**[00:53] naru**
Naked mole rat.
**[00:54] yu**
Moley-san, for short!
**[00:56] yu**
Moley-san said he brought two "lives" with him,
and brought him back to life with that...
**[01:01] atsu**
Yeah, he just sprang back
to life, just like that.
**[01:05] yu**
The Mr. Tawarayama brought back
to life with the "life" he brought...
**[01:09] yu**
Can we really say he's the same
Mr. Tawarayama we knew before?
**[01:17] naru**
G-Good point...
**[01:19] atsu**
I n-never thought of that...
**[01:20] yu**
What are you saying? Mr. Tawarayama
is Mr. Tawarayama!
**[01:25] yu**
Even if he's different on the inside.
**[01:26] atsu**
You think he's different, though?!
**[01:28] naru**
Please, don't unnerve us like this.
**[01:29] ryu**
Yeah! How are we supposed to
interact with him from now on?
**[01:33] yu**
Well, we're graduating,
so *we* don't have to care...
**[03:49] yu**
Atsushi... You know...
**[03:51] yu**
There's something I've been
thinking about lately.
**[03:54] atsu**
What is it, En-chan?
**[03:56] atsu**
The Olympics?
**[03:57] atsu**
Toyosu?
**[03:58] atsu**
Trump?
**[03:59] yu**
No. Flower-viewing.
**[04:01] atsu**
Flower-viewing?
**[04:03] yu**
The cherry blossoms are pretty and all,
**[04:05] yu**
but seasonally speaking,
it's still cold out there.
**[04:08] yu**
Yet people still go at night, and they sit on
the ground outside and have picnics and stuff.
**[04:12] yu**
Pretty rigorous stuff, don't you think?
**[04:14] atsu**
That's true.
**[04:16] atsu**
I bet the salarymen catch colds when they
get drunk and strip down and stuff...
**[04:20] yu**
Also, aren't cherry blossoms iconic
of the first day of school?
**[04:24] atsu**
Yeah, makes you think of first graders
with their big leather backpacks...
**[04:27] yu**
But lately, the cherry blossoms have been
blooming closer to late March, right?
**[04:32] atsu**
Global warming, I guess...
**[04:34] yu**
By early April, all the trees
might even be blossom-free.
**[04:37] atsu**
They do fall awfully quickly.
**[04:40] yu**
You think cherry blossoms might stop
being a first-day-of-school icon
**[04:43] yu**
and become a graduation day icon instead?
**[04:45] atsu**
That sounds pretty nice.
**[04:46] atsu**
Graduating in a storm of cherry blossoms...
**[04:49] yu**
You think? I find the idea
a little lonely, myself.
**[04:55] wom**
I always love coming to the Kurotama Bath!
**[04:58] ari**
Hey!
**[05:00] yu**
Here's an unusual group.
**[05:02] wom**
I met them outside and invited them in!
**[05:06] ari**
That's right! "Come take a bath," he said.
**[05:12] atsu**
What's wrong, Kin-chan?
**[05:14] ari**
He's worried about the graduation ceremony.
**[05:16] yu**
Wondering how long the cherry
blossoms will stay in bloom?
**[05:19] ari**
Cherry blossoms? No, the speech.
**[05:21] kusa**
It's the student council
president's final duty.
**[05:23] atsu**
Oh, Kin-chan, you're giving the speech?
**[05:25] yu**
What's he worried about?
**[05:27] ari**
The text of it.
He can't figure out what to say.
**[05:30] yu**
Why not just string a bunch
of platitudes together?
**[05:33] ari**
When Kinshiro tries to think some up,
it ends after three lines.
**[05:37] kusa**
I struggle with poetic turns of phrase.
**[05:39] atsu**
You shouldn't pressure yourself so much.
**[05:41] yu**
Yeah. It's not like anyone
listens to those things.
**[05:44] kusa**
I dislike such lazy thinking.
**[05:47] atsu**
Yeah, you always have been earnest.
**[05:49] wom**
When you have troubles,
that's when you take a hot bath!
**[05:52] wom**
Such magnificent Earth culture!
**[05:55] ari**
Thinking about it,
**[05:56] ari**
I bet it's that earnestness that
made Zundar seek you out.
**[06:00] kusa**
Clarify.
**[06:02] ari**
Well, I could explain what I think
might have started it all...
**[06:06] ari**
It concerns you, though. Do you mind?
**[06:08] yu**
Huh? Me?
**[06:09] wom**
Say it! Say it!
**[06:11] wom**
All things are permitted,
**[06:13] wom**
as long as they are said with love!
**[06:15] yu**
Actually, I've got the
mental fortitude of tofu.
**[06:18] yu**
In fact, it might be closer to soy milk.
**[06:21] ari**
See, Yufuin-san... you're smart,
but you don't work hard,
**[06:25] ari**
and you tend to leave most
things to luck. Right?
**[06:28] yu**
That's a hell of a question to ask a person...
**[06:30] atsu**
I think he's right, though.
**[06:33] atsu**
Sometimes that's a good thing...
***SIGN*** Finals Test Order Ranking (3rd Years) Rank Name 1st Yufuin En 2nd Kusatsu Kinshiro 3rd Itsumo Nisan 4th Kinugawa Atsushi
**[06:35] ari**
...and sometimes, it's very bad.
**[06:45] ari**
Well, knowing our earnest,
hard-working president,
**[06:48] ari**
I'm sure that stoked his anxieties.
**[06:52] wom**
How can Zundar be so cute?!
**[06:55] wom**
So cute!
**[06:57] atsu**
Wait, is that how you met Zundar?
**[07:00] ari**
Certainly not.
**[07:02] ari**
He fell from the sky.
**[07:03] (Flashback) zun**
Zundar commands you!
**[07:05] (Flashback) zun**
Convert the student council
into the Earth Conquest Club,
**[07:08] (Flashback) zun**
and purge the world of sloth and negligence.
**[07:12] yu**
Um... You're kidding.
**[07:15] ari**
Our president just can't refuse a hard sell.
**[07:18] atsu**
I know.
**[07:19] kusa**
What is that supposed to mean, At-chan?!
**[07:20] atsu**
That you can't say no when
someone asks you for a favor.
**[07:24] kusa**
I can't, can I? Then what about
you guys in the Defense Club?
**[07:27] yu**
How we started, you mean?
How'd that go, again?
**[07:29] atsu**
I don't actually remember.
**[07:30] wom**
This is pathetic!
We met here, just like this!
**[07:42] wombat**
Where might this be?
**[07:46] atsu**
A public bath... Why do you ask?
**[07:48] wombat**
What is a pub-lic-bath?
**[07:49] atsu**
It's a place where you pay money
to sit in heated water,
**[07:54] atsu**
to maintain bodily hygiene and relax the mind.
**[07:57] wombat**
Relax the mind!
**[07:58] wombat**
The people of this planet have an even
more refined civilization than I thought!
**[08:05] wombat**
How I should like to protect this planet.
**[08:08] wombat**
R-Right...
**[08:10] wombat**
Would you mind helping me?
**[08:14] wombat**
Please!
**[08:17] wombat**
Um... I'd just like...
**[08:19] wombat**
to talk...
**[08:22] en**
H-Hey! It stinks! It hurts!
The fur's pricking me!
**[08:25] atsu**
What is this thing? A bear? A dog? A pig?
**[08:28] yumoto**
Sirs! Please, no wrestling in the bath!
**[08:32] yumoto**
A wombat!
**[08:37] yumoto**
Diprotodontia Macropodidae!
**[08:39] yumoto**
Cousin to the koala!
**[08:41] yumoto**
They get sick if they get lonely
and have flat noses!
**[08:44] yumoto**
There, there! Don't struggle!
**[08:46] wombat**
Help me!
**[08:52] en**
He came back to life?!
**[08:54] wombat**
After all this, I won't
ask any more of you boys!
**[08:57] wombat**
On the contrary, I'm going to
make you take responsibility!
**[09:01] atsu**
Responsibility?
**[09:02] ryuu**
For what?
**[09:03] yumoto**
He's saying we can cuddle
for the rest of our lives!
**[09:05] wombat**
It'll take too long to explain,
so I'll make it quick!
**[09:08] wombat**
Lovracelet!
**[09:14] yumoto**
What's this?
**[09:16] yumoto**
You're giving them to us?
"The Wombat Returns"?
**[09:18] wombat**
The Lovracelets are your love, given form!
**[09:22] yumoto**
Wombat's love given form?
**[09:24] en**
Wait, what the hell is "love given form"?
**[09:27] yumoto**
It buzzed!
**[09:29] ryu**
Are these defective?
**[09:31] io**
That's a problem. Should I contact the
manufacturer and earn us a quick buck?
**[09:34] atsu**
You're surprisingly unscrupulous.
**[09:36] wombat**
They are not defective!
**[09:39] wombat**
That's the Lovracelet's Love Alert!
**[09:42] wombat**
Let's go!
**[09:44] wombat**
Now, you must "Love Making"
into the Battle Lovers!
**[09:48] en**
Huh? Love Ma—
**[09:50] en**
You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
**[09:53] io**
What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
**[09:56] ryuu**
"Beloved Earth"?
**[09:58] ryuu**
No justice can come from loveless power!
**[10:01] io**
You, too?
**[10:03] io**
Love is all!
**[10:05] atsu**
Are you... being forced to say this?
**[10:08] atsu**
Live for love! Die for love!
**[10:10] yumoto**
I get it!
**[10:11] yumoto**
Making us pose and say embarrassing lines
is part of your mysterious power, right?
**[10:15] wom**
No, it is the power of love!
**[10:18] yumoto**
We are the heirs to the throne of love!
**[10:21] five**
Battle Lovers!
**[10:25] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[10:52] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[10:53] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[10:56] en**
Love Making.
**[11:06] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[11:08] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[11:11] atsu**
Love Making!
**[11:21] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[11:22] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[11:25] io**
Love Making.
**[11:35] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[11:37] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[11:40] ryuu**
Love Making!
**[11:50] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[11:51] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[11:54] yumoto**
Feel the power...
**[11:56] five**
Of love!
**[12:00] yumoto**
Our powers unite to...
**[12:15] yumoto**
Love Attack!
**[12:31] kusa**
That took forever! It was lazy, too!
**[12:34] ari**
Not like you can cure the Defense
Club's laziness at this point.
**[12:37] kusa**
Whose side are you on, Arima?
**[12:39] ari**
Yours, of course, Kinshiro!
**[12:42] haru**
You fools!
**[12:44] haru**
It's just this behavior that lets
others take advantage of you!
**[12:48] aki**
I agree with Haru completely.
**[12:49] gero**
Goodness. This whole business
has made you both so touchy.
**[12:52] haru**
You're the one who's touchy.
**[12:55] gero**
I told you from the start,
I don't care either way.
**[12:59] aki**
Wait. The most unforgivable ones here are...
**[13:03] aki**
Those two in the Defense Club!
**[13:06] gero**
For once, I actually agree
with you, Beppu Brothers.
**[13:09] ryu**
What the heck?
**[13:09] naru**
What on earth?
**[13:10] atsu**
What's going on?
**[13:11] atsu**
Some sort of trouble?
**[13:13] naru**
No, I wouldn't say trouble, exactly...
**[13:16] ryu**
They dragged us into it.
**[13:17] both**
What do you mean, dragged you into it?!
**[13:19] wom**
H-Have our second-years
caused you some trouble?
**[13:22] yu**
Wom-san's become a fussy old lady.
**[13:24] haru**
We can't make a decision because
they won't take it seriously.
**[13:28] gero**
It would be nice to have
things cleared up soon.
**[13:30] haru**
Not that I'm personally invested in the result...
**[13:33] ryu**
I told you, whoever wants
to do it should do it!
**[13:37] naru**
It doesn't even matter who reads the address.
**[13:40] yu**
Address?
**[13:41] atsu**
The speech by an underclassman
representative to the graduating students.
**[13:44] yu**
Oh, *that* kind of address.
**[13:47] ryu**
You hear that, guys?
**[13:48] ryu**
It matters so little, he doesn't even
know what you're talking about.
**[13:51] gero**
Of course, I personally don't
care one way or the other.
**[13:54] gero**
But for public events like this,
rules and conventions should be respected.
**[14:00] aki**
Of course.
**[14:01] aki**
But isn't that all the more reason it shouldn't be
another student council member who reads it,
**[14:04] aki**
but the best representative
of the school as a whole?
**[14:08] haru**
Although, if you really *want* to read it,
that's another matter entirely...
**[14:12] gero**
If I was asked to, I'd be willing.
**[14:14] gero**
I *do* feel I'd be more appropriate than
**[14:18] gero**
some students who only just transferred here.
**[14:20] ryu**
This is getting on my nerves!
**[14:22] ryu**
Do you want to do it or not?!
Make up your mind!
**[14:25] gero**
Why don't you say that to these two?
**[14:27] gero**
If you want to do it, just say so.
**[14:29] gero**
I'm fully prepared to step down.
**[14:32] haru**
It's clear to me that *you're*
the one who wants to do it.
**[14:34] aki**
Self-conscious, are you? How sad.
**[14:37] naru**
If you ask me, it's all
pots calling kettles black.
**[14:40] all**
What did you say?!
**[14:42] aki**
I can't let that one slide.
**[14:43] haru**
Neither can I!
**[14:45] gero**
Setting the address aside for a moment,
**[14:47] gero**
is there another person in the world so
dedicated to their personal beauty as I?
**[14:53] gero**
Even just drinking tea,
**[14:55] ---**
or even when I sigh, I'm beautiful.
**[14:58] gero**
See? Like this.
**[15:15] {song**
*The common people's faces,
so ugly in their laughter*
**[15:22] {song**
*The crowds comport themselves
exactly like pigs*
**[15:29] {song**
*Let common sense and wise sayings be damned*
**[15:36] {song**
*If they do not agree with my aesthetics*
**[15:43] {song**
*I am true beauty!*
**[15:49] {song**
*No one can hope to match my
face, my hair, my body...*
**[15:56] {song**
*More beautiful than flowers,
more enchanting than the moon*
**[15:59] {song**
*Yes, I'm so much more!*
**[16:03] {song**
*The true evil in the world is disorder*
**[16:10] {song**
*I'll purge it all in the name of beauty!*
**[16:29] gero**
You see now? I'm the true "good-looking boy."
**[16:32] gero**
Rather, the "precious human being."
**[16:34] both**
Wow. Amazing.
**[16:36] gero**
Spare me your insincere praise.
**[16:38] gero**
You really are insensitive, aren't you?
**[16:40] ryu**
No, I *genuinely* find this incredible.
**[16:43] nari**
Same, same.
**[16:45] aki**
I'm sure I don't need to say it,
but we carry the title of eternal pretty boys,
**[16:50] aki**
and our Beppu Apes comprise
98% of the whole school.
**[16:53] aki**
And we're close to the
graduation ceremony guest,
**[16:56] aki**
representative of the Binan Ginza
Young Men's Association, Hakone Gora!
**[17:00] aki**
It's obvious that either of us would make
**[17:02] aki**
appropriate representatives
of the underclassmen!
**[17:06] {song**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[17:13] {song**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[17:16] {song**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[17:33] {song**
*We were born in the Milky Way*
**[17:39] {song**
*You see the supernova in our eyes?*
**[17:46] {song**
*The reason you can read
your fortune in the stars*
**[17:53] {song**
*Is because we've written the
script of your dreams there*
**[17:59] {song**
*Lucky you! Open your eyes!*
**[18:02] {song**
*Happy you! Open them wide!*
**[18:05] {song**
*Don't be too dazzled by this radiance...*
**[18:08] {song**
*This is how we're kissing you!*
**[18:14] {song**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
blooming in the galaxy!*
**[18:21] {song**
*Moon and sun, miracles and secrets*
**[18:24] {song**
*We're the stars making wishes come true!*
**[18:27] {song**
*VEPPer, the twin stars
racing through the galaxy!*
**[18:34] {song**
*Let's illuminate the mysteries
of the universe...*
**[18:37] {song**
*On the name of the stars!*
**[18:40] {song**
*Come with us, and we'll be eternal legends!*
**[18:49] both**
Wow. Amazing.
**[18:51] ari**
Our school's second-years
certainly are aggressive.
**[18:54] ryu**
You said it!
**[18:55] nari**
We're practically invisible
**[18:57] nari**
next to gimmick characters like them.
**[19:15] {song**
*Let's start from today*
**[19:18] {song**
*From savings to investment...*
**[19:21] {song**
*The bank's interest is mere pocket change*
**[19:24] {song**
*I'm playing the stock market, baby*
**[19:28] {song**
*I research information on my tablet*
**[19:31] {song**
*Looking for the brands
that seem ready to explode*
**[19:34] {song**
*And once I've found enough good data*
**[19:36] {song**
*I buy them all up at near rock-bottom prices*
**[19:40] {song**
*But I don't wait for them
to hit their ceiling*
**[19:47] {song**
*I choose a price in advance,
and once it hits my goal,*
**[19:55] {song**
*I sell without a moment's hesitation!*
**[19:59] {song**
*Ah, money is the only true
justice in this world*
**[20:05] {song**
*As long as I have money,
I can beat any enemy with ease!*
**[20:11] {song**
*Let me teach you a few
of my earning techniques*
**[20:18] {song**
*World peace, you say?
I'll even find a way to buy that!*
**[20:26] {song**
*Money is all!*
**[20:37] {song**
*Baby baby, sweet baby*
**[20:41] {song**
*Don't be so selfish*
**[20:45] {song**
*You won't turn me on that way, you know*
**[20:59] {song**
*I'm the hottest guy around*
**[21:02] {song**
*My hair style's always on point*
**[21:06] {song**
*Just one look and you're through*
**[21:09] {song**
*You're mine forever*
**[21:12] {song**
*Are you ready?*
**[21:14] {song**
*You want to fall head over heels, don't you?*
**[21:19] {song**
*It's a game of teasing, ups and downs*
**[21:23] {song**
*And in that game, it's always my turn*
**[21:26] {song**
*I have as many girls in my service*
**[21:33] {song**
*as there are stars in the sky*
**[21:36] {song**
*I'm the prince of the stars!*
**[21:41] {song**
*Baby baby, sweet baby*
**[21:44] {song**
*If you want my love*
**[21:47] {song**
*Better watch out for burns on your heart!*
**[21:55] {song**
*Call me, call me, call me more*
**[21:58] {song**
*Don't be so selfish*
**[22:02] {song**
*You won't turn me on that way, you know*
**[22:17] ari**
Oh? Is it that kind of episode?
**[22:20] ari**
I guess I'll have a go at it, too.
**[22:32] {song**
*If you wish it, I shall bend my knee to you*
**[22:42] {song**
*I do not feel disgraced, but honored*
**[22:52] {song**
*The first day I met you*
**[22:58] {song**
*It was as if I received a divine mission*
**[23:03] {song**
*For devoting myself to you fills me with joy*
**[23:14] {song**
*Let's keep this up forever,
until my life ends*
**[23:19] {song**
*I will travel with you
to the end of the world*
**[23:24] {song**
*This is just as a butler should be*
**[23:29] {song**
*Loyal servitude...*
**[23:32] {song**
*This is my one and only philosophy!*
**[23:51] en**
Sheesh, what a pain in the ass...
**[23:55] {song**
*Shall I teach you the secret to world peace?*
**[23:58] {song**
*Everyone just has to do nothing!*
**[24:01] {song**
*Everything in this world
takes too much effort to do*
**[24:04] {song**
*And I really, really
don't want to do anything*
**[24:07] {song**
*Actually, I want to know where
you guys get all this energy*
**[24:10] {song**
*Just beat the enemy so that I can go home!*
**[24:20] {song**
*I don't want to do anything*
**[24:23] {song**
*I have absolutely zero enthusiasm*
**[24:26] {song**
*Why, then, do I have to fight?*
**[24:33] {song**
*The class representative,
the most popular guy in school...*
**[24:39] {song**
*Those guys are cut out to heroes!*
**[24:42] {song**
*So why was I chosen?!*
**[24:45] {song**
*Everything in this world
takes too much effort to do*
**[24:48] {song**
*And I really, really
don't want to do anything*
**[24:51] {song**
*Actually, I want to know where
you guys get all this energy*
**[24:54] {song**
*Just beat the enemy so that I can go home!*
**[24:57] {song**
*I want to waste my life
lying around, doing nothing*
**[25:01] {song**
*I want to sleep, wake up,
and go back to sleep!*
**[25:04] {song**
*Eating a hot spring manju once in a while...*
**[25:07] {song**
*To sum up, everything takes
too much effort to do!*
**[25:24] atsu**
Oh, En-chan.
**[25:26] atsu**
You say it's too much effort,
but you do it anyway.
**[25:28] atsu**
Guess I'll try it, too!
**[25:44] {song**
*What am I afraid of?*
**[25:46] {song**
*Having an invisible wall in front of me*
**[25:51] {song**
*Makes me realize my own cowardice*
**[25:54] {song**
*Sacrificing passion for clear-headedness*
**[26:01] {song**
*Is such a foolish thing to do*
**[26:04] {song**
*Move the way you feel,
that's what I should do*
**[26:09] {song**
*Something even more simple
than running on instinct*
**[26:14] {song**
*But do I have that fire inside of me?*
**[26:19] {song**
*Why so cool? I want to shout
until my voice turns hoarse*
**[26:25] {song**
*As if it could set my cold heart ablaze*
**[26:29] {song**
*Am I such a fool?
When I act like a bystander,*
**[26:35] {song**
*I have nothing, I achieve nothing*
**[26:53] atsu**
Well? Want to try it too, Kin-chan?
**[26:57] kusa**
If I must.
**[26:59] {song**
*You were laughing again,*
**[27:05] {song**
*not knowing what I go through*
**[27:13] {song**
*Even if it was an idle promise,
it was still a betrayal*
**[27:19] {song**
*Ever since I learned even sworn
friendship could break down*
**[27:24] {song**
*I had stopped making wishes on stars*
**[27:30] {song**
*But for some reason, I found myself
looking to the night sky again*
**[27:35] {song**
*What was I searching for,
every time we passed?*
**[27:41] {song**
*Not for an opportunity,
but for my own courage*
**[27:46] {song**
*When all I want to do is to go
back to the way things were...*
**[27:52] {song**
*There's a pain in my chest,
you're like a devil*
**[27:57] {song**
*When even your smiles seem
to pierce through my heart*
**[28:02] {song**
*Did you just whisper "that's all over now"?*
**[28:08] {song**
*Or was that me, screaming,
trying to run away?*
**[28:13] {song**
*How many times did I turn
back to look at you?*
**[28:19] {song**
*Since you were walking away,
you never knew...*
**[28:35] ari**
Now, what were we talking about again?
**[28:37] naru**
We were talking about our character
gimmicks being far inferior to theirs.
**[28:41] ryu**
We're basically extras.
**[28:43] naru**
So anyway, you should
work this out without us.
**[28:46] naru**
Maybe you could ask the senpais to decide.
**[28:48] gero**
No!
**[28:48] gero**
There are four third-years, an even number!
**[28:50] aki**
What if it ends up as a tie?
**[28:51] ryu**
But we're an even number, too!
**[28:53] naru**
Yumoto! There's only one of him.
He'll be our odd number.
**[28:55] ryu**
That's right!
**[28:56] ryu**
The underclassman representative needs
the support of the first-years, too.
**[28:59] naru**
Huh?
**[29:00] ryu**
Yumoto?
**[29:01] wom**
I have not been cuddled *once* today.
**[29:05] all**
Eh?
**[29:05] ---**
What?!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[29:11] ryu**
Yumoto!
**[29:12] ryu**
There he is!
**[29:13] all**
Yumoto!
**[29:15] ryu**
That *is* Yumoto, isn't it?
**[29:19] kusa**
He's here?
**[29:21] yu**
I think so...
**[29:22] ari**
What's he doing?
**[29:24] naru**
He's got something in his hands.
**[29:26] ryu**
Isn't that a sponge?
**[29:28] all**
A sponge?
**[29:29] gero**
Why?
**[29:29] haru**
Wherefore?
**[29:30] aki**
To what end?
**[29:31] wom**
Yumoto-san!
**[29:32] wom**
What is that you're squishing there?
**[29:36] wom**
Am I not enough for you?
**[29:40] wom**
Go on, cuddle me!
**[29:42] yu**
This is freaky.
**[29:43] wom**
Cud-dle-me!
**[29:43] yu**
It's like he's been totally broken.
**[29:45] atsu**
Wom-san's so desperate...
He hated it so much at first.
**[29:49] wom**
Cuddle me!
**[29:50] both**
He did, he did.
**[29:53] kusa**
The light's back in his eyes.
**[29:56] wom**
If something is troubling you,
you can tell us about it.
**[30:00] yumo**
There's nothing.
**[30:01] wom**
Tell us!
**[30:03] ryu**
I think I know what this is.
**[30:05] kinu**
What?
**[30:06] ryu**
Relationship burn-out.
**[30:07] naru**
The result of an overextended spring.
**[30:10] kinu**
Enthusiasm's fall?
**[30:12] haru**
It is spring, though.
**[30:13] aki**
Fall?
**[30:14] kinu**
This is no time for a vaudeville routine.
**[30:17] yu**
Seriously, what's wrong?
**[30:19] yu**
Nothing.
**[30:21] en**
Give me a break.
**[30:22] en**
The show's been on for thirty minutes
without the protagonist having a line.
**[30:25] en**
There's clearly something wrong.
**[30:28] yu**
I'm not a protagonist. I'm not anything.
**[30:32] wom**
What did you say?!
**[30:33] kusa**
That's a serious statement.
**[30:36] ari**
Haven't you loved all your enemies into
submission with your heavy-handed lectures?
**[30:41] gero**
Yeah! Just like this!
**[30:44] {song**
*One, two, three! Love and joy!*
**[30:47] {song**
*Let's get started!*
**[30:49] {song**
*One, two, three! Love and joy!*
**[30:55] {song**
*It's sudden, but it was inevitable!*
**[30:58] {song**
*Time to transform!*
**[31:00] {song**
*It's the old story of
the reluctant superhero!*
**[31:06] {song**
*But right now, there's a monster out there!*
**[31:11] {song**
*This is so fun! I'm gonna fight!*
**[31:16] {song**
*I love cuddling! I wanna cuddle things!*
**[31:23] {song**
*That's why I need to protect Earth!*
**[31:26] {song**
*So I can love everything even more!*
**[31:34] {song**
*Love, love! Today's another great day!*
**[31:39] {song**
*With love on your side,
everything ends in a "hallelujah!"*
**[31:45] {song**
*Cuddle, cuddle! Today's another big success!*
**[31:50] {song**
*I don't know everything that's going on,*
**[31:55] {song**
*but I just want to enjoy
everything with all I've got!*
**[31:59] {song**
*One, two, three! Love and joy!*
**[32:02] {song**
*Let's keep going!*
**[32:04] {song**
*One, two, three! Love and joy!*
**[32:15] yu**
Well, that's all over now.
**[32:18] yu**
It just feels like a fondly remembered
**[32:22] yu**
but far distant past...
**[32:29] en**
Yumoto just raised one hell
of a set of death flags.
**[32:34] atsu**
Maybe he's getting sentimental
because it's spring.
**[32:37] atsu**
Let's give him some time to himself.
**[32:42] atsu**
What?
**[32:43] kusa**
Nothing...
**[32:44] ari**
I understand how you feel, Kinshiro, but...
**[32:49] kusa**
Arima!
**[32:50] ari**
For now, let's figure out what to do with the
student address and the graduates' reply speech.
**[32:53] gero**
Yeah.
**[32:59] yu**
It hurts to be around my senpais.
**[33:03] yu**
I wish graduation...
**[33:04] man**
...would never, ever come!
**[33:07] man**
Listen to them all!
Graduation this, graduation that!
***SIGN*** Botan Yuzuru
**[33:11] man**
What's so great about
graduation ceremonies? Huh?!
**[33:15] yu**
I hear you.
**[33:18] man**
What?!
**[33:18] yu**
I know how you feel.
**[33:36] ryu**
Okay, let's decide it
with rock-paper-scissors.
**[33:39] gero**
Certainly.
**[33:40] naru**
Let's try it.
**[33:42] trio**
Scissors, paper, rock!
**[33:44] trio**
Rock! Rock! Rock!
**[33:45] ari**
Just three days left...
**[33:48] yu**
Oh, until the graduation ceremony?
**[33:49] kinu**
It sure sneaks up on you, huh?
**[33:53] en**
I'd prefer to get it over with
sooner rather than later...
**[33:55] en**
Wonder what'll happen when it's over.
**[33:57] kusa**
Nothing.
**[34:00] kusa**
Nothing will change.
**[34:02] kusa**
It can't possibly change.
***SIGN*** 132nd Graduation Ceremony Binan High School
**[34:13] boy**
Senpai, you've helped me
out so much. Thank you!
**[34:17] sen**
Keep up the hard work,
even with us gone, okay?
**[34:20] boy**
Okay!
**[34:21] sen**
These three years went by so fast.
**[34:24] sen**
Seriously. It feels exciting
and sad, all at once.
**[34:31] taw**
This peaceful weather is perfect
for a graduation ceremony.
**[34:34] taw**
Don't you agree, Mr. Principal?
**[34:35] prin**
I do agree.
**[34:37] prin**
Mr. Tawarayama, have you grown
more youthful than before?
**[34:42] prin**
Just a little while ago, you were like
a dead fish or a rotted-out tree...
**[34:46] taw**
Do I look that much better?
**[34:49] pri**
Yes...
**[34:52] ko**
So... S-Senpai, th-this might
be a bit early, but...
**[34:57] ko**
C-Can I have your second jacket button?
**[35:00] sen**
Second button?
**[35:02] ko**
I might not get a chance
to ask after the ceremony...
**[35:05] ko**
But I want a memento of you.
**[35:08] ko**
I'll treasure it forever!
**[35:09] ko**
I want it, too!
**[35:11] sen**
Gosh...
**[35:12] botan**
Give me a damn break!
**[35:15] botan**
To hell with graduation ceremonies!
**[35:17] botan**
To hell with jacket buttons!
**[35:18] botan**
To hell with the senpai-kouhai relationship!
**[35:20] botan**
All of you, die!
**[35:28] kusa**
What's going on?
**[35:31] kusa**
Conquest!
**[35:36] kusa**
The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
**[35:39] kusa**
Aurite!
**[35:43] kusa**
The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
**[35:46] kusa**
Argent!
**[35:51] kusa**
The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
**[35:53] kusa**
Perlite!
**[35:55] kusa**
We are the rulers of this blue world...
**[35:58] kusa**
Caerula Adamas!
**[36:01] kusa**
We shall not allow you
to disrupt life on campus!
**[36:06] bot**
You're the Caerula Adamas!
**[36:08] bot**
Damn you!
**[36:13] gero**
Go!
**[36:16] kura**
Take this!
**[36:22] kusa**
Where did he go?
**[36:23] kinu**
Kin-chan!
**[36:24] kinu**
Leave this to us!
**[36:27] kinu**
You should prioritize your roles
as student council members.
**[36:31] ari**
You're sure we can leave it to you?
**[36:33] en**
If you can't, just give up.
**[36:35] ari**
That was an easy agreement.
**[36:37] kusa**
Understood. At-chan, we're counting on you.
**[36:39] kinu**
Right.
**[36:40] kinu**
Let's go, everyone!
**[36:41] ---**
Yeah!
**[36:50] bot**
Graduation, initiation, congratulation...
They can all go to hell!
**[36:55] bot**
Tomorrow, you'll still be the same
**[36:57] bot**
lazy idiots you were yesterday and today!
**[37:04] zun**
From what I've been told,
**[37:05] zun**
a "graduation ceremony" is a
ritual wherein the conclusion
**[37:09] zun**
of one's course of study is acknowledged,
and maturation and achievements are praised.
**[37:13] dada**
Talk about conceited!
**[37:15] dada**
It's ridiculous, isn't it, big bro?
**[37:17] zun**
Enough of this mutual admiration society!
**[37:19] zun**
We, the Zundar-Dadacha Brothers,
are the ones truly deserving of praise!
**[37:22] zun**
If you can't understand that, we will
demonstrate our fraternal power to you now!
**[37:27] zun**
Go, Second Button Monster!
**[37:30] bot**
I'll never let you graduate!
**[37:33] yu**
That's enough! I can't believe
there are still monsters around!
**[37:37] ryu**
But *why* are they still around?
**[37:39] naru**
I'm pretty sure the Beppu
Brothers reformed, so...
**[37:43] en**
You two... the Teeny-Tiny Brothers!
**[37:45] zun**
Don't just give us...
**[37:47] dada**
...some random name!
**[37:48] atsu**
Didn't they go home reformed?
**[37:50] en**
Things got a little crazy back there...
**[37:53] en**
I actually don't remember how it ended.
**[37:55] ryu**
How'd it go, again?
**[37:56] naru**
How did it go, indeed?
**[37:58] zun**
We pretended to reform and return home,
**[38:01] zun**
while secretly waiting
for a chance for revenge!
**[38:05] dada**
It was so cold. We were so hungry...
**[38:09] dada**
Days of sleeping under eaves
and porches, enduring typhoons,
**[38:12] dada**
with just a single newspaper between us...
**[38:15] zun**
Say no more, Dadacha.
**[38:17] dada**
Brother!
**[38:18] dad**
We bore the unbearable!
**[38:19] zun**
Endured the unendurable!
**[38:21] both**
We are the Teeny-Tiny Brothers!
**[38:23] both**
Our victory is nigh!
**[38:25] yu**
Hey, they adopted the name I gave them.
**[38:27] wom**
Everyone!
**[38:29] wom**
Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
**[38:33] yumoto**
Love Making!
**[39:01] yumoto**
The Sparkling Prince!
**[39:03] yumoto**
Battle Lover Scarlet!
**[39:06] en**
Love Making.
**[39:17] en**
The Flashing Prince!
**[39:19] en**
Battle Lover Cerulean!
**[39:21] atsu**
Love Making!
**[39:31] atsu**
The Piercing Prince!
**[39:33] atsu**
Battle Lover Epinard!
**[39:36] io**
Love Making.
**[39:46] io**
The Roaring Prince!
**[39:48] io**
Battle Lover Sulfur!
**[39:51] ryuu**
Love Making!
**[40:01] ryuu**
The Thrilling Prince!
**[40:03] ryuu**
Battle Lover Vesta!
**[40:05] ryuu**
This love-filled planet will
not abide those who lack love!
**[40:09] ryuu**
Those who wield loveless
power must kneel before love!
**[40:13] ryuu**
Love is power!
**[40:14] ryuu**
Love is hope!
**[40:16] ryuu**
Be born for love!
**[40:17] ryuu**
Give your life for love!
**[40:19] ryuu**
Love!
**[40:20] ryuu**
We are, forever, the heirs
to the throne of love...
**[40:23] ryuu**
Battle Lovers!
**[40:25] ryuu**
Feel the power...
**[40:27] ryuu**
Of love!
**[40:30] dada**
There you are, Battle Lovers!
**[40:32] zun**
Finish them!
**[40:34] bot**
Fools, trying to stop my attempt
to stop the graduation ceremony!
**[40:37] bot**
Take this!
**[40:40] ryu**
Hurts!
**[40:41] naru**
It does hurt more than you'd expect it to!
**[40:43] kinu**
And so many buttons...
**[40:45] en**
Where did he get them all?
**[40:47] bot**
These are all the buttons
no one ever asked for!
**[40:52] bot**
The buttons of tragic students
who had to leave the school
**[40:55] bot**
without any kouhai talking to them
or asking for their buttons!
**[40:59] bot**
The buttons hurt in proportion to
the tears that were shed over them!
**[41:03] ryu**
You're talking about a petty grudge.
**[41:04] ryu**
"I'm pissy because no one
paid attention to me."
**[41:08] en**
It has nothing to do with graduation
ceremonies or personal virtue.
**[41:11] bot**
Shut up! Grudges rock!
**[41:19] bot**
What?
**[41:25] yu**
Brothers-senpai!
**[41:33] yu**
The twin stars shining in the heavens!
**[41:35] yu**
Salty Sol!
**[41:37] yu**
Melty Luna!
**[41:40] yu**
Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
**[41:43] dada**
You're going to transform without MC Dadacha?
**[41:46] haru**
We can't remain reliant on an MC forever.
**[41:49] aki**
We're going to set our own
stage for ourselves, Dadacha.
**[41:53] dada**
How admirable!
**[41:54] dada**
I mean... how ungrateful!
**[41:56] dada**
Second Button Monster, punish those two!
**[41:59] bot**
Done and done!
**[42:05] bot**
Are graduation ceremonies
really that important?
**[42:08] haru**
Yes, they are!
**[42:09] bot**
Why? Because of your senpais?
**[42:12] aki**
Not just that!
**[42:13] aki**
We also want to show the visiting
guests how we're doing, too!
**[42:16] aki**
Because we owe them!
**[42:22] bot**
That's even more annoying!
**[42:24] bot**
To hell with personal growth!
To hell with people you care about!
**[42:35] bot**
The finish!
**[42:38] yu**
Brothers-senpai!
**[42:42] yu**
What gives you the right to stop this?
**[42:45] yu**
Don't you realize graduation
ceremonies are important?
**[42:47] bot**
I decide what's important and what's not!
**[42:50] yu**
You can decide for yourself
what's important to you,
**[42:54] yu**
but not to other people!
**[42:56] bot**
Then let me ask you this!
**[42:57] bot**
You say everyday hard work and obeying the
rules every day are the most important things!
**[43:01] bot**
So what's the point of
having a special ceremony?
**[43:06] bot**
Isn't the real meaning to be found
in doing the same thing every day?
**[43:11] yu**
You're right...
**[43:12] atsu**
Oh, no! Yumoto's being out-debated!
**[43:15] bot**
When all's said and done,
**[43:17] bot**
graduation ceremonies are
absolutely meaningless!
**[43:26] all**
Yumoto!
**[43:28] zun**
We did it!
**[43:28] dada**
We did it! We did it!
**[43:32] yu**
Scarlet Love Lumiere!
**[43:37] atsu**
Why?
**[43:37] wom**
Yumoto-san's power comes from
his declarations of love!
**[43:42] wom**
Now he's lost that,
**[43:44] wom**
he's lost his power as
Battle Lover Scarlet, too!
**[43:47] all**
Wh-What did you say?!
**[43:49] bot**
What's wrong, Battle Lover Scarlet?
**[43:55] all**
Yumoto!
**[43:56] wom**
Why, after loving down so
many monsters in the past,
**[44:00] wom**
is he failing now?
**[44:02] gora**
I know how Yumoto feels.
**[44:05] wom**
What did you say?
**[44:06] gora**
Yumoto empathizes with the monster.
***SIGN*** Guest
**[44:09] gora**
That's why he can't bring
himself to attack it.
**[44:12] wom**
Empathizes?
**[44:13] wom**
How could he feel the same
way the monster does?
**[44:16] gora**
Because...
**[44:18] gora**
He doesn't want the graduation
ceremony to happen, either!
**[44:23] yu**
I... I don't want the graduation
ceremony to happen.
**[44:35] naru**
Yumoto loved out?
**[44:37] ryu**
What are you doing? Get a grip!
**[44:39] yu**
Not being able to be happy for
En-chan-senpai and Atsushi-senpai's graduation...
**[44:43] yu**
Taking the side of a monster...
**[44:46] yu**
I'm a failure as a Battle Lover.
**[44:49] yu**
To be honest, I don't care
about the graduation ceremony.
**[44:54] yu**
To be even more honest,
I wish they'd call it off.
**[45:04] all**
Love Out.
**[45:10] yu**
Senpais?
**[45:11] yu**
Brothers-san?
**[45:14] en**
You're right. I was feeling the same way.
**[45:16] atsu**
Yeah.
**[45:19] haru**
He got us.
**[45:20] aki**
Hit the nail on the head.
**[45:23] yu**
No! It's not for reasons like you guys,
**[45:26] yu**
because it's annoying or
I don't want to bother...
**[45:29] yu**
My reason... My reason is much more selfish!
**[45:32] yu**
Because I want to stay in the
Defense Club with you guys forever!
**[45:37] yu**
That's why!
**[45:38] yu**
I'm sorry!
**[45:40] bot**
The team's broken up, and now
you've lost your will to fight?
**[45:43] bot**
Now, die!
**[45:47] all**
Yumoto!
**[45:49] yu**
Senpais!
**[45:50] gora**
Yumoto! The others!
**[45:52] wom**
Go no further!
**[45:54] gora**
Why?
**[45:55] wom**
This matter must be resolved
by the Battle Lovers!
**[45:59] wom**
What is real love?
**[46:00] wom**
If they cannot discover that for themselves,
**[46:03] wom**
then no matter how you aid them,
they will never defeat that monster!
**[46:08] wom**
And, Maximum Gora...
**[46:12] wom**
Your love is in letting things go.
**[46:15] gora**
I see.
**[46:17] gora**
Yumoto...
**[46:18] dada**
They appear to be utterly helpless.
**[46:20] both**
Dadacha!
**[46:21] both**
Zundar!
**[46:23] dada**
Now we can go home with heads held high!
**[46:25] zun**
VEPPer, do you see which
side is stronger now?
**[46:28] dada**
Now, come rejoin TV Universe
and we'll start over again!
**[46:34] haru**
No way! We refuse!
**[46:35] aki**
We'll never do as you say ever again!
**[46:38] dada**
What?!
**[46:40] haru**
Dadacha, we're grateful to you.
**[46:42] haru**
But we need to go even further than before.
**[46:46] aki**
We can't move forward if
we're trapped in the past.
**[46:49] haru**
That's why we...
**[46:50] aki**
...are saying goodbye to you!
**[47:00] bot**
Finished already, are you?
**[47:04] yu**
The fun times in the club room.
**[47:08] yu**
The kindness of my senpais!
**[47:12] yu**
The struggles of the Battle Lovers!
**[47:16] atsu**
Yumoto?
**[47:18] yu**
The love we inspired in each other!
**[47:21] all**
The love we inspired in each other!
**[47:28] yu**
The spirits that would never be broken!
**[47:31] all**
The spirits that would never be broken!
**[47:38] yu**
Defense Club forever!
**[47:41] all**
Forever!
**[47:43] yu**
Congratulation on your graduation, senpais.
**[47:46] yu**
Thanks for everything.
**[47:47] yu**
It's sad to say goodbye,
**[47:50] yu**
but in exchange,
**[47:51] yu**
we'll be gaining a new future
that spreads out wide before us.
**[47:57] yu**
Love Congratulation!
**[48:05] bot**
Such optimistic words!
**[48:08] bot**
I was so focused on the graduation ceremony,
**[48:10] bot**
I forgot what lay beyond!
**[48:12] bot**
So this is... love!
**[48:22] wom**
They purged the monster without even
transforming into the Battle Lovers?
**[48:26] wom**
What a miracle!
**[48:28] wom**
This is the true power of love!
**[48:30] yu**
Love Graduation!
**[48:33] atsu**
Yumoto! Ryu! Io!
**[48:35] en**
Thanks for everything.
**[48:37] atsu**
We'll work hard, so you
keep up the hard work, too.
**[48:40] all**
Right!
**[48:45] kusa**
Today, we experience the
ritual of graduation.
**[48:49] kusa**
To be perfectly honest,
**[48:51] kusa**
we will not see tremendous changes in
ourselves when this ceremony concludes.
**[48:56] ---**
But there is one thing I know for certain:
**[49:00] ---**
I will remember this day
for the rest of my life.
**[49:05] ---**
And whenever I'm feeling frustrated or sad,
**[49:10] ---**
I'll remember my friends' faces
**[49:12] ---**
and feel empowered once again.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[49:26] en**
Well, that's over.
I hate sitting still for so long.
**[49:30] ari**
Defense Club, have you seen Zundar around?
**[49:33] aki**
Has anyone seen Dadacha?
**[49:35] yumo**
Actually, Wom-san's not here, either...
***SIGN*** To Everyone
**[49:38] en**
What's this?
**[49:40] atsu**
A letter?
**[49:42] wom**
* Battle Lovers... Rather, members*
* of the Earth Defense Club...*
**[49:47] wom**
*By the time you read this,*
**[49:50] wom**
* I will likely be completing the*
* preparations for my return home.*
**[49:54] wom**
*Now that Earth is filled with love,*
**[49:57] wom**
*I must move on to a different planet.*
**[50:01] wom**
*There are still many planets in the universe*
**[50:06] wom**
*filled with hatred, fear, and indifference.*
**[50:08] wom**
* It seems my retirement*
* is still a long way off.*
**[50:12] zun**
Let us out! Let us out!
**[50:13] wom**
*If, in the future,*
**[50:14] wom**
* the Earth is threatened by*
* another loveless something,*
**[50:19] wom**
*I hope you will all think back on the days*
**[50:23] wom**
*you spent as heirs to the throne of love.*
**[51:01] all**
Wom-san!
**[51:03] yu**
Wom-san!
**[51:06] wom**
Everyone!
**[51:08] yu**
What's wrong with you? How could
you just sneak away like that?
**[51:12] en**
You could stay another
day or two, couldn't you?
**[51:16] atsu**
H-Here! Your favorite, spinach curry!
**[51:20] ryu**
You'll come again, won't you?
You will, won't you?
**[51:22] naru**
Stay in touch! I'll keep my schedule open!
**[51:25] wom**
Thank you!
**[51:26] yu**
Wom-san, thanks for all the cuddles!
**[51:29] yu**
I'll never forget the cuddles we shared!
**[51:31] wom**
I'll never forget, either!
**[51:35] wom**
All of you...
**[51:37] wom**
Heirs to the throne of love...
**[51:39] wom**
Be well!
**[52:29] {song**
*As we spent our days doing trivial things*
**[52:39] {song**
*I guess we always knew this day would come*
**[52:50] {song**
*No matter how much everything else changes*
**[52:55] {song**
*We've created something
that won't ever change*
**[53:00] {song**
*Which means we can walk forward,
always knowing the way*
**[53:11] {song**
*When you walk down that long staircase,
you must never look back*
**[53:22] {song**
*Let's take a step into a new future*
**[53:27] {song**
*Embracing love*
**[53:35] {song**
*The love born to my heart and yours*
**[53:46] {song**
*It still connects us, powerfully*
**[53:51] {song**
*So wipe away your tears*
**[53:56] {song**
*This massive, massive future
opens up ahead of us*
**[54:10] {song**
*I won't ever feel lonely*
**[54:15] {song**
*Because we're connected by love*
**[54:41] {song**
*The love born to my heart and yours*
**[54:52] {song**
*It still connects us, powerfully*
**[54:57] {song**
*So wipe away your tears*
**[55:03] {song**
*Let's open up the massive,
massive future ahead*
**[55:16] {song**
*Once we've exchanged all our words of thanks*
**[55:22] {song**
*We'll walk on, with love*
# Season 4
# 1 - The Suddenness of HAPPY! KISS
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] fura**
--
**[00:00] etsu**
--
**[00:00] ---**
--
**[00:00] kiri**
--
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[00:32] kiri**
Hey, Kyotaro! There you are!
**[00:37] kiri**
What's that? A bird?
**[00:42] shu**
You shouldn't have startled him, Ryo-chin.
**[00:44] kiri**
I see the animals still love you, at least.
**[00:48] kiri**
Didn't I catch you napping with a stray cat
in the courtyard not long ago?
**[00:53] shu**
Did you?
**[00:54] kiri**
Look at you, you're a mess.
**[00:56] kiri**
You need to brush your hair.
**[00:57] shu**
So? What did you want?
**[00:59] kiri**
Oh, right. You missed a quiz.
**[01:03] kiri**
I told them you were in
the nurse's office, but...
**[01:05] shu**
Ah, thank you.
**[01:08] kiri**
Don't "thank you, yawn" me!
**[01:12] kiri**
You're gonna get written up again.
**[01:15] shu**
I'll work it out.
**[01:16] kiri**
Work it out how?
**[01:18] shu**
Well, things have always worked out before.
**[01:21] kiri**
Is that looking on the bright side,
or throwing in the towel?
**[01:25] shu**
I'm not sure...
**[01:26] shu**
What do you think it is, Ryo-chin?
**[01:28] kiri**
How should I know?
**[01:30] kazu**
Is this indolence I see?
**[01:31] kiri**
Insolence?
**[01:32] kazu**
In-do-lence.
**[01:34] kiri**
Wakura-senpai, you really have
an advanced vocabulary.
**[01:38] kazu**
Put simply, it means "lazy."
**[01:42] kazu**
But since things always work out for you,
**[01:45] kazu**
I can't totally criticize you,
which is the problem.
**[01:49] shu**
I think I just get lucky.
**[01:51] kazu**
No, no. Even if it's just luck,
it's impressive.
**[01:57] waku**
Ryoma-kun, would you make us some tea?
**[01:58] kiri**
What treats did you bring today?
**[02:00] waku**
I'm not telling you, Ryoma-kun.
**[02:03] waku**
Just kidding. It's salt
daifuku from the Takeyado.
**[02:07] kiri**
Salt daifuku!
**[02:08] kiri**
What tea do you recommend?
**[02:11] waku**
Roasted green...
**[02:12] kiri**
Got it!
**[02:13] waku**
Just kidding. A bitter black would be best.
**[02:15] kiri**
R-Right!
**[02:18] shu**
Hey, Nanao-san.
**[02:19] waku**
Yes?
**[02:20] shu**
I've been thinking...
**[02:22] shu**
Aren't you a little too hard on Ryo-chin?
**[02:26] waku**
Certainly not.
**[02:27] waku**
Things do tend to get hard
when he's around.
**[02:30] kiri**
What do you mean by that?
**[02:32] waku**
You really want to know?
**[02:33] kiri**
No, actually.
**[02:36] waku**
It's because you're so much fun, Ryoma-kun.
**[02:41] kiri**
I'm... honored.
**[02:42] shu**
I think I see what you mean.
**[02:45] waku**
Right?
**[02:48] waku**
Well, all that aside...
**[02:50] waku**
The little ones are late, aren't they?
**[02:52] do**
Hey, hey, hey!
**[02:53] do**
I told you, it's proof!
**[02:54] ban**
What's this one board supposed to prove?
**[02:57] dogo**
I told you, it's proof that people
besides us were in the Defense Club!
**[03:02] ban**
It's just a silly prank.
**[03:03] dogo**
What makes you think it's a prank?
**[03:06] waku**
What's going on, Ichiro-kun? Taishi-kun?
**[03:08] shu**
Why are you always arguing? Chiro, Tai-Tai?
**[03:12] dogo**
Taishi says there was no Defense Club!
**[03:12] ban**
Ichiro says there was a Defense Club!
**[03:16] kiri**
Hey, little ones. I see you're playing nice.
**[03:17] dogo**
Little ones? You mean us?
**[03:20] ban**
That label is extremely inappropriate.
**[03:22] ban**
Well, maybe it's all right for Ichiro.
**[03:24] dogo**
Hey, hey, hey! What do you mean,
it's all right for me?
**[03:26] ban**
Do I really need to explain reality to you?
**[03:29] ban**
You're a munchkin, Ichiro.
**[03:30] dogo**
I've gained three millimeters
since the year started!
**[03:33] ban**
Your math must be off.
**[03:35] kiri**
So, what's this about the Defense Club?
**[03:38] dogo**
We're debating whether
there was a Defense Club...
**[03:40] ban**
...or if there wasn't one.
**[03:43] dogo**
Nanao-senpai, what do you think?
**[03:45] ban**
It's just a prank, right?
**[03:48] waku**
That's a good question...
**[03:50] waku**
What do you think, Kyotaro-kun?
**[03:53] shu**
Long ago... or perhaps not so long ago,
**[03:58] shu**
there were aliens who were
trying to destroy Earth.
**[04:01] shu**
But others rose up to prevent them,
and this is where they organized.
**[04:07] shu**
They called themselves
the Earth Defense Club.
**[04:11] dogo**
You mean, they protected Earth?
**[04:13] shu**
You think they didn't?
**[04:15] shu**
What did you think they
were protecting, Chiro?
**[04:17] ban**
Wait a minute. Shuzenji-senpai,
were you just...
**[04:21] shu**
...making it up.
**[04:25] kiri**
I thought it sounded made up.
**[04:27] shu**
I just thought it would
be neat if it was true.
**[04:29] kiri**
Yeah, yeah. Let's have tea, everyone.
***SIGN*** The Suddenness of HAPPY! KISS
**[04:39] shu**
Maybe their enemies were
called the Conquest Club.
**[04:43] shu**
That would be the opposite of the Defense Club.
**[04:44] kiri**
Are we still on this subject?
**[04:46] shu**
Each time I look at that darkened sign,
**[04:49] shu**
it feels like we've come so far.
**[04:52] dogo**
Kyotaro-senpai, you sound
like an old man. It's freaky.
**[04:56] shu**
Is it?
**[04:58] shu**
I want to get older soon,
so I can spend eternity spacing out.
**[05:03] shi**
I won't allow it!
**[05:06] una**
But you don't think adding more
school rules is a bit much?
**[05:09] shi**
Unazuki-san, you're too soft.
**[05:12] shi**
If we allow for freedom and independence,
**[05:14] shi**
Binan High School will deteriorate further.
**[05:16] shiro**
It's not good right now?
**[05:18] shiro**
I'm in shock...
**[05:19] shi**
Of course it's not, Maasa!
**[05:22] shi**
Indolence and sloth run rampant!
**[05:25] shiro**
Indolence? Sloth?
**[05:28] shiro**
I don't understand those words myself.
***SIGN*** Koshigawa Wataru
**[05:31] etsu**
*I just love the Binan High
School student council!*
**[05:35] etsu**
*The ever-gallant president, Ibusuki Ata-san!*
**[05:39] etsu**
*With his aura of born handsomeness,
vice president Unazuki Taiju-san!*
**[05:44] etsu**
*And the impish little cutie-pie,
secretary Shirahone Maasa-san!*
**[05:49] etsu**
*They're too bright for my eyes to behold!*
**[06:03] kiri**
Kyotaro, you're like an old man.
**[06:06] kiri**
You even make breathing
look like too much effort.
**[06:09] shu**
If I forget to breathe, do remind me.
**[06:17] shu**
This feels good.
**[06:19] shu**
Makes me sleepy...
**[06:21] kiri**
H-Hold it, Kyotaro!
**[06:26] kiri**
Kyotaro. What's that?
**[06:33] ban**
Yikes!
**[06:37] karl**
Wow, I can't believe there's
water in a place like this!
**[06:41] karl**
Major surprise!
**[06:42] kiri**
Who's this? A customer?
**[06:44] waku**
I've never seen him before.
**[06:46] karl**
Sorry to startle you.
**[06:48] waku**
No, that's all right...
**[06:50] shu**
You came here dressed?
**[06:53] kar**
Should I have taken off my clothes?
**[06:55] waku**
Well, one usually does.
**[06:58] karl**
How come?
**[06:59] kiri**
Isn't it uncomfortable to be in wet clothes?
**[07:03] karl**
Now that you mention it...
**[07:05] karl**
But...
**[07:13] karl**
Now it's all better!
**[07:15] dogo**
Wow, wow, wow! You're like an animal!
**[07:18] karl**
Is that strange? Unusual?
**[07:23] karl**
You don't dry off so easily here?
**[07:27] karl**
I see!
**[07:28] karl**
Then... can you do this?
**[07:32] dogo**
No, no, no!
**[07:35] karl**
How about this?
**[07:39] dogo**
I told you, no, no, no.
**[07:50] waku**
What is this? Magic tricks?
**[07:54] karl**
That's right, this is our tributary!
**[07:58] karl**
It's the human realm! Earth!
**[08:00] karl**
The people, the powers,
and the society are all different!
**[08:03] karl**
Neat!
**[08:05] karl**
But this is no time to
stand around starry-eyed...
**[08:07] karl**
Oh, oh, what was I supposed
to do next, again?
**[08:11] dogo**
What's a tributary?
**[08:12] ban**
A territory. Sort of like a colony.
**[08:16] karl**
I know! I should explain.
**[08:19] karl**
I need to explain to you... my subjects!
**[08:25] karl**
I'm Karls, first prince of Honyala Land!
**[08:28] karl**
I've come to rule over you, happy-style!
**[08:33] dogo**
What the heck is this? What, what, what?
**[08:35] ban**
Is that an otter?
**[08:36] karl**
Oh, drat. I turned back to normal. Tee-hee.
**[08:42] shu**
I need to trade in my
winning popsicle sticks.
**[08:45] karl**
Wait, wait! I've got a deal for you!
**[08:48] shu**
A great offer?
**[08:49] karl**
Yes! Info on an amazing, surprising bargain!
**[08:52] karl**
You'll regret it forever
if you let this slip away.
**[08:54] waku**
Just what is this deal?
**[08:56] karl**
The Karls Knights are hiring!
**[08:58] karl**
You get to be my knights for free!
**[09:01] karl**
You can even help me in my happy reign!
**[09:04] karl**
Great deal, huh?
**[09:08] waku**
Right, I need to wash
the curtains in my room.
**[09:11] waku**
I just forgot, I'm running low on tea.
**[09:12] waku**
I have a library book to return.
**[09:13] waku**
Gotta water my flowers.
**[09:15] karl**
Wait! Wait!
**[09:17] karl**
Is all that more important
than being a knight?
**[09:22] shu**
No... it just sounds like a raw deal.
**[09:29] karl**
Someone is sad.
**[09:37] etsu**
*I never wanted to grow up.*
**[09:40] etsu**
* The older I get,*
* the more dirty and ugly I become.*
**[09:45] etsu**
*I don't want to change.*
**[09:47] etsu**
*I want to be a child forever.*
***SIGN*** 1704th The tradition!!
Pretty Boy Contest
**[09:56] etsu**
I can't even take part in the
Pretty Boy Contest anymore, either.
**[10:00] etsu**
I, who was once called an angel,
**[10:03] etsu**
have shed my wings and fallen to earth!
**[10:08] etsu**
Who's there?
**[10:13] una**
I see. What a terrifying story.
**[10:16] shira**
The world is just packed
full of fear, isn't it?
**[10:19] shira**
You'd be better off faithfully
serving your ruler, then.
**[10:23] etsu**
What are you talking about?
**[10:31] etsu**
Blorf!
***SIGN*** Shuzenji Kyotaro
Born 11/28
Blood Type: B
Sagittarius
Hobbies: Napping and hot baths
Likes: Dorayaki, spacing out
**[10:40] kiri**
Wh-What happened?
**[10:42] shu**
Think it got something caught in its throat?
**[10:43] kiri**
Like what?
**[10:45] karl**
J... J...
**[10:46] shu**
Just Google it, asshole?
**[10:48] karl**
No!
**[10:50] karl**
Someone is sad.
**[10:53] waku**
Sad?
**[10:55] waku**
I suppose there would be.
**[10:57] waku**
There are 7.5 billion people in the world.
**[10:59] waku**
They can't all be doing
cartwheels all the time.
**[11:01] karl**
You're wrong! They all need
to be happy, all the time!
**[11:04] waku**
Um, you think he's a cult
person or something?
**[11:08] kiri**
Well, he's not exactly a person...
**[11:10] shu**
Either way, he doesn't seem like
someone we should get involved with.
**[11:14] karl**
Wait! Wait!
**[11:15] karl**
I can't stand having someone sad out there!
**[11:17] karl**
I want to make him happy!
**[11:19] shu**
Even though you're an otter?
**[11:21] karl**
I'm not an otter! I'm Karls!
**[11:23] karl**
I'm a prince!
**[11:24] karl**
So c'mon, just work for
me a little, would you?
**[11:27] shu**
What's with that natural exploitation style?
**[11:30] karl**
C'mon... Just for a little while!
**[11:32] karl**
Please! C'mon! Please!
**[11:33] shu**
Sorry.
**[11:34] shu**
You can beg me like a louse of an absentee
husband all you want, but it's not happening.
**[11:36] karl**
I'm begging you!
**[11:38] kiri**
He's getting awfully friendly.
**[11:39] shu**
Nope, not happening.
**[11:42] karl**
Darn it... In that case...
**[11:51] dogo**
That really hurt!
**[11:53] ban**
Hey, are we at school?
**[11:54] dogo**
What is this? So bad, so bad, so bad!
**[11:57] waku**
Somebody's probably calling the cops now.
**[11:59] kiri**
I'm cold out here! I'm gonna catch a cold!
**[12:02] karl**
Gentlemen! I'll explain later—
**[12:05] shu**
You can't throw people out
naked in early spring.
**[12:08] shu**
I'm very cold right now.
**[12:09] karl**
A little exercise would warm you u—
**[12:11] shu**
Japanese otters were hunted for their
pelts and went extinct as a result.
**[12:17] shu**
Perhaps you could warm me up.
**[12:19] karl**
Warm you up?
**[12:21] shu**
As a pelt.
**[12:23] mon**
Blorf!
**[12:24] all**
Blorf! Blorf! Blorf!
**[12:28] dogo**
I can't tell what they're saying...
**[12:31] ban**
It sounds like a chorus made up of the
world's worst elementary school bullies!
**[12:36] stu**
Help!
**[12:43] kai**
Taste the terror of the tone-deaf "blorf!"
***SIGN*** Blorf
**[12:48] dogo**
Is he behind it?
**[12:49] shu**
You got it, Chiro.
**[12:51] waku**
He's producing that "blorf" sound everywhere.
**[12:57] waku**
Is that the sad person?
**[13:00] karl**
Yes!
**[13:02] karl**
He's currently beset by anger and suffering!
**[13:05] karl**
It's the depths of sorrow!
**[13:06] karl**
As a prince, I cannot allow my
subjects to experience such misery!
**[13:10] karl**
As the first prince of Honyala
Land, Karls de Yutari Honyalala,
**[13:13] karl**
I'm going to make him happy!
**[13:15] karl**
My knights of happiness!
**[13:18] karl**
Come on!
**[13:31] karl**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[14:11] shu**
Magic Knight of the Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[14:25] kiri**
Magic Knight of the Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[14:38] waku**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[14:51] ban**
Magic Knight of the Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[15:04] dogo**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[15:09] dogo**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[15:12] dogo**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[15:14] dogo**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[15:17] dogo**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[15:19] dogo**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[15:22] dogo**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[15:25] dogo**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[15:30] karl**
Knights contract complete!
**[15:33] kiri**
Hey, this isn't right!
**[15:34] kiri**
I didn't do that willingly!
**[15:36] waku**
How did it work, exactly?
**[15:38] waku**
Brainwashing? Hypnosis? A dream?
**[15:40] ban**
We shouldn't underestimate that otter...
**[15:43] shu**
His hand was surprisingly soft.
**[15:46] all**
*That's* your comment?!
**[15:47] shu**
Well, it really was soft. And smooth.
**[15:53] kiri**
We're flying?
**[15:54] waku**
It seems we really have become magic knights.
**[16:04] dogo**
Hey, he's coming after us!
**[16:06] ban**
No mercy. We'll have to
friggin' crush that guy!
**[16:09] kiri**
We will?
**[16:11] ban**
We can hardly stand back and leave the
students of Binan High School in danger.
**[16:16] karl**
Yes, yes! Go, make them happy!
**[16:19] dogo**
Hey, you...
**[16:19] kar**
I'm not the one you should be looking at!
**[16:23] ban**
Get the hell away from us!
**[16:29] dogo**
Taishi!
**[16:31] karl**
Oh. Those aren't for throwing...
**[16:36] waku**
Wow, those things are powerful!
**[16:40] kiri**
Wakura-senpai?
**[16:45] waku**
Just kidding.
**[16:49] kiri**
We did it!
**[16:54] kiri**
What do you want?
**[16:56] kiri**
Why are you doing this?
**[16:58] ban**
Kirishima-senpai, we're under no
obligation to ask for his motivations.
**[17:02] mon**
I'll tell you!
**[17:03] dogo**
Hey, whoa, he just started talking!
**[17:07] mon**
I was once happy.
**[17:10] mon**
But one day, I became unhappy.
**[17:13] mon**
Anger and fear. I didn't want to grow up.
**[17:13] kiri**
Any idea what he's talking about?
**[17:14] mon**
The older I got, the dirtier
and uglier I would become.
**[17:15] dogo**
Not a clue.
**[17:15] ban**
Clueless.
**[17:16] waku**
You think he's just throwing
a tantrum or something?
**[17:17] mon**
I didn't want to change.
I wanted to remain a child.
**[17:19] mon**
No! I'm generously sharing
my fear with others!
**[17:23] kiri**
Uh, I don't think anyone
wants a piece of that...
**[17:25] mon**
Shut up!
**[17:28] shu**
But, hey...
**[17:30] shu**
Aren't fear and unhappiness
and such relative?
**[17:34] kiri**
Kyotaro, what are you doing?
**[17:36] dogo**
I had a feeling one of us wasn't in the shot...
**[17:39] ban**
I thought the layout artists flubbed it.
**[17:41] waku**
Just watching, huh?
**[17:43] shu**
I was rooting for you. Inside.
**[17:46] kiri**
Even after transforming,
Kyotaro's still Kyotaro...
**[17:50] karl**
Wait! Let's hear what Fiore Kiss has to say!
**[17:53] dogo**
Fiore?
**[17:57] shu**
Well, if you're happy,
you'll think happiness is best, right?
**[18:00] mon**
Shut up! Happiness is the
first step to depravity!
**[18:03] mon**
Fear brings people together!
**[18:05] mon**
It makes them take action out
of anger and dissatisfaction!
**[18:07] shu**
Yeah, but I hate being brought together.
**[18:10] shu**
Being alone is easier.
**[18:13] ban**
He has a point, sort of...
**[18:15] dogo**
He's being pretty blunt about it.
**[18:17] shu**
So what's wrong with being happy?
**[18:19] shu**
Even if it's depravity.
**[18:20] mon**
What's this? My fear isn't working...
**[18:24] shu**
Well, "blorf" isn't exactly terror-inspiring...
**[18:27] kiri**
Kyotaro doesn't have any
hang-ups at all, does he?
**[18:30] mon**
Hang-ups?
**[18:32] mon**
You call this a hang-up?
**[18:34] karl**
Now, my knights!
**[18:36] karl**
Make him happy at once!
**[18:43] shu**
Huh? Why are you looking at me?
**[18:45] kiri**
Couldn't you help us out a little?
**[18:47] ban**
You sound like a wife
nagging her lazy husband...
**[18:49] dogo**
I mean, come on! You got the
cool red uniform and all!
**[18:53] shu**
Being in red doesn't mean
anything in particular.
**[18:56] ban**
In most stories, being red
means you're the leader.
**[19:00] ban**
Red brings to mind sun, flame,
heat, blazing blood, etc.
**[19:04] ban**
That's one theory for why
it's the leader color.
**[19:07] ban**
Another theory suggests that red is the
first color that a child's eye perceives,
**[19:12] ban**
and so they use red, since children
are more likely to recognize it.
**[19:17] kiri**
That's our Taishi.
**[19:19] kiri**
He's a font of old lady trivia.
**[19:20] ban**
I'm not an old lady!
**[19:22] dogo**
Anyway, red has to be the leader.
**[19:25] dogo**
Now... Kyotaro-senpai,
beat that thing already!
**[19:29] shu**
Well, I mean, I really don't
think red is my color...
**[19:34] kiri**
I wonder why Kyotaro is our Red, anyway...
**[19:37] waku**
Maybe because he was first
to make the oath kiss?
**[19:41] waku**
But since Kyotaro is Red,
I think it's time he showed his stuff.
**[19:44] shu**
I'm not Red. But I guess this
won't end until I do it.
**[19:48] karl**
Now, combine your powers to make him happy!
**[19:52] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:53] karl**
Yes!
**[19:54] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:55] karl**
Yes!
**[19:55] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:56] karl**
Yes!
**[19:57] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:58] karl**
Yes!
**[19:58] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:59] karl**
Yes!
**[20:00] karl**
Let's happy hour!
**[20:03] all**
Happy and Set!
**[20:16] shu**
Return to happiness!
**[20:19] shu**
Happy and Turn!
**[20:30] mon**
Feels just like heaven!
**[20:38] shu**
Happy End!
**[20:41] etsu**
What was I...
**[20:44] shu**
So your fear was about your voice changing?
**[20:47] shu**
No need to worry about that.
**[20:50] shu**
Soon enough, you'll become an
old man in every way there is.
**[20:53] shu**
Not just your voice.
**[20:55] etsu**
Old man?
**[21:06] shu**
I was trying to encourage him...
**[21:08] kiri**
You messed up.
**[21:10] waku**
But maybe it's a good chance for
him to learn more about himself.
**[21:15] karl**
Yeah! Because "happy" isn't
something you search for!
**[21:17] karl**
It's something you feel!
**[21:19] karl**
You did a great job for your
first time as magic knights.
**[21:22] karl**
Let's work together from now on!
**[21:25] ban**
From now on?
**[21:26] dogo**
How long do we do this, exactly?
**[21:27] karl**
Until either Furanui or I become king,
and your sentence...
**[21:32] karl**
I mean, your contract is fulfilled
and your Happybraces disappear.
**[21:35] dogo**
Happybraces?
**[21:36] ban**
Furanui?
**[21:38] karl**
Happybraces are those bracelets from before!
**[21:42] karl**
Furanui is my little brother.
**[21:44] kura**
Brother?
**[21:45] fra**
Prince Karls.
**[21:49] fra**
I shan't let you defeat me.
**[21:52] fra**
I am the true heir to the
throne of Honyala Land,
**[21:54] fra**
and better suited to rule over our subjects.
**[21:57] dogo**
Oh wow, so cute!
**[21:59] ban**
Though what he's saying is fairly outrageous.
**[22:09] fura**
If you attempt to stand against me...
**[22:12] fura**
I shall do all I can to eliminate you.
**[22:15] fura**
With the Furanui Knights... the Edelstein!
***SIGN*** HAPPY Recipe
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** Next time: "Let's happy kiss our way to HAPPY Recipe"
***SIGN*** Princes Karls and Furanui compete to become king of the magical realm, Honyala Land.
***SIGN*** Happyocracy or reign of fear... Which will rule in the human world?
***SIGN***
# 2 - HAPPY Recipe
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:04] fura**
Prince Karls!
**[00:09] karl**
Furanui?
**[00:10] karl**
Hey, it's Furanui!
**[00:13] karl**
Hey! Hey-ho!
**[00:15] shu**
I'm not a watchtower, you know...
**[00:19] kiri**
Huh? Ata-kun?
**[00:21] kiri**
Hey, aren't you guys our student council?
**[00:23] waku**
It does look like them.
**[00:25] shu**
Wow, look at those weird outfits.
**[00:26] kiri**
Kyotaro, don't say that. It's rude.
**[00:30] waku**
And our outfits aren't exactly
the greatest, anyway.
**[00:32] dogo**
Why are they standing all the way up there?
**[00:35] man**
I'm interested in knowing
how they got up there.
**[00:39] ma**
The riffraff don't even know what to make of us.
**[00:41] ma**
Look at those slack-jawed expressions.
**[00:43] dogo**
Hey, Masa! Masa!
**[00:45] dogo**
You're gonna slip!
**[00:46] ma**
I don't need your opinion!
**[00:49] yu**
Today, we're merely testing your prowess.
**[00:51] yu**
Don't think you've won yet.
**[00:55] dogo**
Are we involved in some kind of competition?
**[00:56] man**
Dunno.
**[00:57] kar**
Hey, Furanui! When'd you get here?
**[01:00] fura**
Prince Karls! This undignified
conduct of yours...
**[01:03] fura**
It's confirmation that you lack
a king's manners and poise.
**[01:07] karl**
What? What's that? I can't hear you!
**[01:10] karl**
What's this about hammers and pigeons?
**[01:13] fura**
I said nothing about pigeons!
**[01:17] shu**
I don't think this has anything
to do with us, so can we go?
**[01:23] yu**
I see you're as oblivious to
social conventions as ever.
**[01:26] yu**
This just reaffirms that the world
must be ruled with an iron fist.
**[01:31] fura**
Yes.
**[01:32] fura**
Hear me.
**[01:33] fura**
I, Furanui, second prince of Honyala Land,
**[01:37] fura**
will conquer this place!
**[01:42] dogo**
What's this? Conquer?
**[01:44] man**
So he'll be our leader, eh?
**[01:46] dogo**
That dog thing, you mean?
**[01:48] waku**
Well, if that's what he wants,
he might as well go for it.
**[01:52] kiri**
Are you sure?
**[01:53] waku**
Well, we don't know that he'll succeed.
**[01:57] waku**
But I am curious about what led you to try.
**[02:01] fura**
A fine question.
**[02:03] fura**
If you wish to hear why, I'll tell you.
**[02:07] shu**
I'm so tired.
***SIGN*** HAPPY Recipe
**[03:45] (Flashback) kamo**
How many years has it been since I first took
**[03:49] (Flashback) kamo**
the throne of the magical
kingdom, Honyala Land?
**[03:52] (Flashback) kamo**
I've grown old, and it is time for
me to pass my throne to another.
**[03:58] (Flashback) kamo**
And so, my wonderful sons...
**[04:02] (Flashback) kamo**
Furanui and Karls...
**[04:05] (Flashback) kamo**
You must go to the tributary of Honyala Land
**[04:07] (Flashback) kamo**
and prove you have
what it takes to be a king.
**[04:11] (Flashback) kamo**
Whomsoever I deem worthy
shall be given the throne.
**[04:17] (Flashback) fura**
I understand.
**[04:19] (Flashback) fura**
Those of noble blood have
a duty to lead the people.
**[04:22] (Flashback) fura**
I swear I shall prove myself to you,
Your Majesty.
**[04:26] (Flashback) kamo**
I'm counting on you, Furanui.
**[04:28] (Flashback) kamo**
Karls, what about you?
**[04:31] (Flashback) karl**
Oh, you know I'm up for it!
**[04:32] (Flashback) karl**
It sounds neat!
**[04:34] (Flashback) karl**
But what exactly does it take to be a king?
**[04:38] (Flashback) kamo**
To discover that and make it a part of
yourself is one of the requirements.
**[04:43] (Flashback) kamo**
While keeping my expectations realistic,
I hope you can do it.
**[04:46] (Flashback) kamo**
Minister Wao, go with them,
**[04:50] (Flashback) kamo**
and help them if need be.
**[04:54] (Flashback) wao**
Leave it to me.
**[04:55] (Flashback) wao**
I, Wao, shall carry out my duties faithfully.
**[04:59] (Flashback) karl**
So, where is this tributary exactly?
**[05:03] (Flashback) kamo**
The human realm... Earth,
I believe it's called.
**[05:15] (Flashback) fura**
Is this it?
**[05:23] (Flashback) fura**
I like it!
**[05:26] (Flashback) stu**
Who's gonna win this time?
***SIGN*** 1704th The tradition!!
Pretty Boy Contest
**[05:29] (Flashback) stu**
Aren't you gonna enter?
**[05:30] (Flashback) stu**
Me?
**[05:32] (Flashback) man**
Anyone who's finished with the
assignment can go home early.
**[05:38] (Flashback) stu**
I'm so tired.
**[05:38] (Flashback) stu**
C'mon, not like it has to be perfect.
**[05:42] (Flashback) stu**
Yeah, I'm done.
**[05:52] (Flashback) fura**
Indolence! Affectation! Deceit!
**[05:54] (Flashback) fura**
This world is inundated
with every vice imaginable!
**[05:58] (Flashback) fura**
I must guide these fools to
a more respectable world!
**[06:03] (Flashback) fura**
Rise, Furanui!
**[06:04] (Flashback) fura**
Strive, Furanui!
**[06:10] (Flashback) fura**
Is that man dead?
**[06:17] (Flashback) fura**
He's utterly unguarded...
**[06:21] (Flashback) fura**
I could slit his throat and
he wouldn't even notice...
**[06:30] (Flashback) fura**
What is this... this atmosphere
of comforting indifference...
**[06:36] (Flashback) fura**
These waves of sheer calm...
**[06:39] (Flashback) fura**
This air of sheer innocuousness...
**[06:42] (Flashback) fura**
I feel my motivation slipping away...
**[06:49] (Flashback) shi**
Look at you, dead to the world!
**[06:53] (Flashback) fura**
Oh no!
**[06:54] (Flashback) fura**
Those of noble blood must not allow the lower
classes to see us in such an inattentive state...
**[06:59] (Flashback) fura**
Neglecting the academics that are a student's
duty to wile the day away in hedonistic slumber...
**[07:04] (Flashback) fura**
You should be ashamed, Shuzenji Kyotaro.
**[07:08] (Flashback) shu**
Oh? Ata? What's going on?
**[07:11] (Flashback) ata**
I could ask you the same question!
**[07:14] (Flashback) ata**
Have you been sleeping here all
day instead of going to class?
**[07:18] (Flashback) shu**
Yeah, guess I have.
**[07:20] (Flashback) shu**
Ryo-chin's gonna yell at me again.
**[07:22] (Flashback) ata**
You don't care unless you're yelled at?
**[07:26] (Flashback) shu**
Yeah... I guess that's what it comes down to.
**[07:28] (Flashback) ata**
I was a fool to try to talk to you.
**[07:31] (Flashback) kyo**
Actually, I think you're pretty smart.
**[07:34] (Flashback) ata**
I know that! You don't have to tell me!
**[07:36] (Flashback) shu**
Oh... Okay.
**[07:37] (Flashback) ata**
I can see that the words "diligence" and
"discipline" don't exist in your vocabulary.
**[07:42] (Flashback) shu**
I guess they don't.
**[07:43] (Flashback) ata**
Even sarcasm doesn't work?
**[07:45] (Flashback) shu**
I mean, it's true.
**[07:47] (Flashback) shu**
You and I are really different people, Ata.
**[07:49] (Flashback) ata**
I've had enough!
**[07:51] (Flashback) ata**
I was a fool to even approach you.
**[07:53] (Flashback) shu**
Huh? I told you, you're not stupid...
**[07:56] ata**
*He'll never understand anything!*
**[07:58] ata**
*It really gets under my skin!*
**[08:01] ata**
* Every time, every time,*
* every time, every time...*
**[08:03] ata**
*Shuzenji Kyotaro!*
**[08:05] ata**
*I will make you pay!*
**[08:09] (Flashback) fura**
I see... There may be one sensible
person in this world, after all.
**[08:16] (Flashback) fura**
You there, human!
**[08:19] (Flashback) fura**
I have chosen you to be the captain
of the venerable Furanui Knights.
**[08:23] (Flashback) ata**
What's this? A talking chihuahua?
**[08:25] (Flashback) fura**
Halt! Did you not hear my order?
**[08:31] (Flashback) ata**
What is all this?
**[08:33] (Flashback) fura**
Bow before me!
**[08:39] (Flashback) fura**
Do not attempt to defy me again.
**[08:42] (Flashback) fura**
It is your duty to serve and revere me.
**[08:45] (Flashback) ata**
I have a question for you.
**[08:47] (Flashback) ata**
What's the trick behind this?
**[08:49] (Flashback) fura**
Trick?
**[08:51] (Flashback) fura**
I merely need to will things to move.
**[08:54] (Flashback) fura**
That is all.
**[08:55] (Flashback) ata**
It's magic, then?
**[08:58] (Flashback) ata**
Very well.
**[08:59] (Flashback) ata**
I have no objection to serving you.
**[09:02] (Flashback) fura**
A wise decision.
**[09:06] (Flashback) ata**
But as a knight, I require compensation.
**[09:11] (Flashback) fura**
What are you asking for?
**[09:12] (Flashback) ata**
Your magical power!
**[09:16] (Flashback) fura**
Not just wise, but honest, at that.
**[09:20] (Flashback) fura**
What is your name?
**[09:22] (Flashback) fura**
Ibusuki Ata.
***SIGN*** Student Council Room
**[09:25] (Flashback) masa**
What's this thing? It's so cute!
**[09:28] (Flashback) masa**
Oh, I could just die!
**[09:31] (Flashback) masa**
I know! Picture time!
**[09:33] (Flashback) masa**
I gotta get this on the web!
**[09:34] (Flashback) fura**
Insolent fool! I strike you down!
**[09:39] (Flashback) ma**
What is that thing? It's creepy!
**[09:41] (Flashback) ma**
Freak! Die! Get fat!
**[09:43] (Flashback) una**
So, to sum it all up,
**[09:46] (Flashback) una**
the student council will become
this fox-like creature's...
**[09:49] (Flashback) fura**
I am Prince Furanui!
**[09:51] (Flashback) una**
...Prince Furanui's knights?
**[09:54] (Flashback) una**
That means us?
**[09:55] (Flashback) ata**
If you don't like it,
you don't need to participate.
**[09:57] (Flashback) masa**
I don't like it at all!
**[09:59] (Flashback) masa**
What will people say if they see you
**[10:01] (Flashback) masa**
kowtowing to this little fox thing?
**[10:04] (Flashback) masa**
Right, Unazuki-senpai?
**[10:06] (Flashback) una**
Nah. If Ata's in, that's enough for me.
**[10:11] (Flashback) una**
Maasa, you don't want to?
**[10:13] (Flashback) masa**
But... for the student council of Binan
High School to serve this... shrimpy...
**[10:17] (Flashback) fura**
Shrimpy?!
**[10:19] (Flashback) fura**
Very well...
**[10:20] (Flashback) fura**
I'll take on a form more to your liking, then.
**[10:30] (Flashback) fura**
Does this appease you?
**[10:33] (Flashback) masa**
No way... Wow... So cool...
**[10:36] (Flashback) fura**
Then it's settled.
**[10:37] (Flashback) fura**
I, with you, the Furanui Knights,
**[10:40] (Flashback) fura**
shall institute systematic
rule over this world
**[10:43] (Flashback) fura**
and discipline its foolish
and indolent inhabitants.
**[10:46] (Flashback) ata**
Indolence is sin!
**[10:47] (Flashback) ata**
So is ugliness!
**[10:49] (Flashback) ata**
I don't really get it,
**[10:51] (Flashback) ata**
but people do need to do what
the student council tells them.
**[10:55] (Flashback) fura**
Then allow me to grant you my power!
**[11:02] (Flashback) ata**
This is...
**[11:07] (Flashback) fura**
Now rise, Furanui Knights Edelstein!
**[11:13] (Flashback) trio**
Die Verwandlung!
**[11:16] (Flashback) ata**
That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
**[11:19] (Flashback) ata**
Ritter Diamant!
**[11:22] (Flashback) una**
Affection and comfort...
**[11:24] (Flashback) una**
Ritter Rosenquarz!
**[11:28] (Flashback) masa**
Noble and virtuous!
**[11:29] (Flashback) masa**
Ritter Amethyst!
**[11:33] (Flashback) trio**
We are the Furanui Knights...
**[11:35] (Flashback) trio**
Edelstein!
**[11:39] fura**
That is my story.
**[11:40] fura**
Do you see now?
**[11:43] fura**
They're gone!
**[11:44] fura**
Did those cowards run away?
**[11:46] masa**
I guess they must have lost their nerve!
**[11:49] una**
They're over there.
**[11:57] waku**
A little harder, more to the right.
**[12:00] kiri**
Like this?
**[12:02] waku**
Too far to the right, I think.
**[12:04] kiri**
I'm sorry!
**[12:06] man**
Look that way!
**[12:09] man**
That's my 108th straight victory.
**[12:10] dogo**
You're a devil...
**[12:12] man**
I'm not a devil, and it's not magic.
**[12:14] man**
I just know the system
for winning, that's all.
**[12:16] dogo**
Really? Really? Tell me!
**[12:18] man**
No. Absolutely not.
**[12:19] dogo**
Stingy!
**[12:20] karl**
Come back here, you crafty butterfly man!
**[12:24] karl**
You can't escape me, you fluttery devil!
**[12:27] una**
I think they got sick of our story.
**[12:30] masa**
What on earth?
**[12:31] masa**
How could they get sick
of our fabulous story?
**[12:35] waku**
Sorry! It just kept going and going, so...
**[12:38] dogo**
Also, it had nothing to do with us.
**[12:41] man**
Yeah.
**[12:42] masa**
It *does* have something to do with you!
**[12:44] una**
We're talking about ruling this place.
**[12:47] una**
That means you'll have to do what we say.
**[12:51] kiri**
But you're the student council.
Don't we already do what you say?
**[12:55] una**
There'll be severe punishments, too!
**[12:57] dogo**
When you say it like, "There'll be cake, too!"
**[13:01] dogo**
it's hard to buy into it.
**[13:03] uka**
That's a good point.
**[13:05] uka**
Well, no big.
**[13:07] ata**
Don't let him have that one!
**[13:08] all**
Anyway...
**[13:14] ata**
Hey!
***SIGN*** Kirishima Ryoma Born July 18th Blood Type: A Cancer Hobbies: Taking care of others Likes: "Getanha" cakes, cleaning
***SIGN*** Kiyara Bentaro
**[13:29] club**
Kiyara, are you on a diet?
**[13:32] ki**
Nah...
**[13:33] club**
Well, why aren't you eating?
**[13:37] club**
C-Cute!
**[13:41] club**
Hey, Kiyara! Kiyara Bentaro!
**[13:43] club**
Where are you going?
**[13:46] ki**
*I... I want to eat giant rice balls!*
**[13:51] ki**
* I want to eat a lunch filled*
* with kara-age and ginger pork*
**[13:54] ki**
*and Hamburg steak and tonkatsu...*
**[13:56] ki**
* I love greasy lunches where*
* the only color is brown!*
**[14:01] ki**
* Why does everyone else get*
* to eat the lunches I want?*
**[14:10] fura**
I hear your dissatisfaction and anger.
**[14:16] ki**
Um, I was just thinking about it...
**[14:18] ki**
I know Mom makes those lunches for my sake...
**[14:23] fura**
Spread your fear!
**[14:24] fura**
Furanui Knights!
**[14:27] fura**
Druck!
**[14:28] fura**
Mich!
**[14:29] fura**
Hart!
**[14:32] fura**
An!
**[14:47] club**
I'm so hungry...
**[14:49] club**
You gotta have rice!
**[14:51] club**
Greasy stuff is the best!
**[14:53] club**
Everyone knows lunches need to be filling!
**[14:56] kai**
Cutesy Lunch Beam!
**[15:01] mon**
Stylish! Cute! Low calorie!
**[15:05] mon**
Have a taste of my dissatisfaction,
anger, and fear!
**[15:09] kar**
Hey, hey. Why's he scared of
it being stylish and cute?
**[15:14] waku**
Because men like greasy stuff
that's full of calories.
**[15:18] waku**
It's natural he'd be afraid
of not getting to eat that.
**[15:22] man**
At least 500 calories of meat per meal.
**[15:24] dogo**
Yeah, yeah, yeah! And if it's meat,
it's gotta be steak!
**[15:28] man**
No, it needs to be shabu-shabu.
**[15:30] dogo**
What? That snooty stuff?
**[15:32] man**
In its ability to accommodate
beef, pork, lamb,
**[15:35] man**
or even fish, shabu-shabu is truly versatile.
**[15:40] shu**
The monster guy there seems pretty bored.
**[15:43] waku**
That's right. What were
we talking about again?
**[15:46] shu**
Good question.
**[15:47] kiri**
The student council guys were
saying something, right?
**[15:50] shu**
What was it, again?
**[15:51] ata**
It was about how indolence is sin!
**[15:56] shu**
Was that it?
**[15:57] shu**
Thank you, Ata.
**[15:59] shu**
That's right.
**[16:01] ata**
Not that!
**[16:02] ata**
You're exactly the kind of
people we seek to purge!
**[16:05] ata**
I'm going to do everything
in my power to crush you!
**[16:09] ata**
Cutesy Lunch Monster!
**[16:11] mon**
Cutesy Lunch Beam!
**[16:20] karl**
Look out!
**[16:21] karl**
Everyone, transform! Before you're
turned into cutesy lunches!
**[16:25] shu**
Can't I just watch from the sidelines?
**[16:27] dogo**
What are you saying, Kyotaro-senpai?
Do you want to be reduced to an extra?
**[16:30] shu**
Yeah, preferably one that's
cut off by the frame...
**[16:32] shu**
Cutesy Lunch Beam!
**[16:37] shu**
Kyotaro!
**[16:39] shu**
For a moment there,
I saw a river and a flowerbed...
**[16:43] kiri**
This isn't good, Kyotaro!
**[16:45] kiri**
Anyway, let's transform!
**[16:46] kiri**
That will keep you from getting hurt!
**[16:48] kar**
Exactly!
**[16:50] dogo**
That's the most backward reason for
transforming I've ever heard...
**[16:53] man**
But he does have a point.
**[16:55] man**
Anyway, let's transform.
**[16:59] man**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[17:12] man**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[17:20] man**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[17:27] man**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[17:34] man**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[17:42] man**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[17:47] man**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[17:50] man**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[17:52] man**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[17:54] man**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[17:57] man**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[18:00] man**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[18:03] man**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[18:08] shu**
This again?
**[18:10] karl**
Don't say "this again"!
**[18:12] karl**
Ease his dissatisfaction,
clear his anger, and make him happy!
**[18:17] dogo**
Huh? But how?
**[18:19] mon**
You people could never
understand the way I feel!
**[18:23] kiri**
But I do!
**[18:24] kiri**
Feeling full is awesome!
**[18:26] kiri**
But that's no reason to
resent the other students!
**[18:29] mon**
I don't resent them...
**[18:31] kiri**
Then why are you doing this?
**[18:33] kiri**
Your mother made those lunches
to make her son happy!
**[18:40] ata**
Is he finished already?
**[18:42] ata**
And to fall to Kirishima, of all people?
**[18:44] una**
Shall I apply a self-destruct booster?
**[18:47] masa**
What do you mean?
**[18:48] una**
Hey, Cutesy Lunch Monster!
**[18:51] una**
Your mother puts your cutesy
lunches up on social media every day!
***SIGN*** Today's lunch! I think it turned out really well, as always
**[18:58] both**
Ryoma-senpai!
**[19:01] masa**
Why did he self-destruct?
**[19:02] una**
He was downplaying his frustration
**[19:05] una**
because he thought his mother was
making those lunches for him.
**[19:07] una**
So I shattered that illusion.
**[19:10] masa**
I see!
**[19:11] masa**
She was really doing it to satisfy herself!
**[19:27] waku**
With distrust of others added on top of
his existing dissatisfaction and anger,
**[19:31] waku**
he's now truly invincible.
**[19:38] kai**
Cutesy Lunch Bomb!
**[19:48] kiri**
Kyotaro?
**[19:50] both**
Senpai?
**[19:52] kiri**
You threw yourself into danger
to save your best friend!
**[19:55] shu**
No...
**[19:56] shu**
It's just, hearing all this talk
of lunches was making me hungry.
**[20:01] shu**
I want to go home already.
**[20:03] shu**
Besides, if you don't like
your mother's lunches,
**[20:07] shu**
why not cook for yourself?
**[20:10] mon**
C-Cook for myself?
**[20:13] karl**
Everyone, now!
**[20:14] karl**
Are you happy?
**[20:15] karl**
Yes!
**[20:16] karl**
Are you happy?
**[20:17] karl**
Yes!
**[20:17] karl**
Are you happy?
**[20:18] karl**
Yes!
**[20:19] karl**
Are you happy?
**[20:20] karl**
Yes!
**[20:21] karl**
Are you happy?
**[20:22] karl**
Yes!
**[20:22] karl**
Let's happy hour!
**[20:25] karl**
Return to happiness!
**[20:27] karl**
Happy and Turn!
**[20:38] man**
Oh, it's heaven.
**[20:40] man**
So nice and warm.
**[20:47] shu**
Happy End!
**[20:50] ki**
That's right... Just cook for myself.
**[20:53] ki**
That's a great idea! My very own lunch!
**[21:00] fura**
Well, no matter.
**[21:01] fura**
I was merely testing your prowess for today.
**[21:04] karl**
Oh, you were?
**[21:07] fura**
Await my return.
**[21:08] karl**
Awesome!
**[21:10] dogo**
There he goes.
**[21:12] man**
Well, that was confusing.
**[21:13] kiri**
Oh, Kyotaro. Didn't you say you were hungry?
**[21:17] kiri**
Let's grab a bite somewhere!
**[21:19] shu**
Too much effort.
**[21:20] shu**
I want to sleep.
**[21:22] shu**
Walking is such a bother.
**[21:23] kiri**
Don't be like that!
**[21:25] karl**
Happy Powder!
**[21:29] dogo**
What's all this shiny stuff?
**[21:31] karl**
Yup! It erases the memories of
people who saw stuff!
**[21:35] man**
Destroying the evidence?
**[21:40] kiri**
Kyotaro, don't fall asleep here.
**[21:44] shu**
Just five more minutes.
**[21:45] kiri**
Absolutely not!
**[21:46] kiri**
Kyotaro!
**[21:48] dogo**
Um, there's something I've been wondering.
**[21:51] dogo**
Why do we take a hot bath every day?
**[21:53] man**
Good question.
**[21:56] kiri**
Kind of an old habit, I guess?
**[21:59] man**
Old habit?
**[22:01] karl**
Hot baths make me happy!
**[22:03] karl**
I'm so glad I came to the human world.
**[22:06] waku**
Are hot baths the only thing
our world has over yours?
**[22:10] karl**
Happy, happy!
**[22:15] kiri**
Kyotaro!
**[22:16] kiri**
Kyotaro! I told you not to sleep here!
**[22:19] kiri**
Kyotaro! Kyotaro!
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** HAPPY Ice Cream
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Ice Cream"!
***SIGN*** You know how there are things you see every day, but you don't actually know what they're called...
***SIGN*** ...so you just say "the thing" or "the whatever-it-is"? Next episode is about that kind of stuff.
***SIGN***
# 3 - HAPPY Ice Cream
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] karl**
--
**[00:00] mon**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] una**
--
**[00:05] shu**
Oh, that's right...
**[00:07] shu**
What was that thing called again?
**[00:09] shu**
What thing?
**[00:10] shu**
You know... that thing for
making oyakodon or katsudon.
**[00:15] shu**
The pan-like thing.
**[00:17] wa**
It's called an oyako pan, I believe.
**[00:19] man**
Oyako pan.
**[00:21] man**
A wide, shallow, flat-bottomed
pan with a handle.
**[00:24] man**
Its form is the height of specialization,
**[00:27] man**
configured for creating the
most professional of meals.
**[00:32] dogo**
But, but, but...
**[00:33] dogo**
An oyako pan to make oyakodon?
**[00:35] dogo**
The name feels way too obvious.
**[00:38] man**
Indeed, it may be a bit predictable.
**[00:41] shu**
So... what was that other thing called?
**[00:43] kiri**
What "that thing" do you mean this time?
**[00:45] shu**
You know, the... white
thing, kind of square...
**[00:49] kiri**
I know! Sugar cubes?
**[00:51] shu**
No...
**[00:53] wa**
Melamine sponges, maybe?
**[00:55] dogo**
Oh, I know those!
**[00:56] dogo**
I use them, too!
**[00:58] dogo**
We sure are in sync, Nanao-senpai!
**[01:02] shu**
Not that... You know, the thing.
**[01:05] shu**
The thing you put vegetables
and meat in to keep them cool.
**[01:09] dogo**
Kyotaro-senpai...
**[01:10] dogo**
You're not talking about
a refrigerator, are you?
**[01:13] shu**
Oh. Yeah, that's it.
**[01:16] man**
Refrigerator...
**[01:18] man**
An electrical appliance designed to preserve
food and beverages at low temperature.
**[01:22] dogo**
H-Hang on a minute!
**[01:24] dogo**
Taishi, do we really need that explanation?
**[01:26] man**
I guess we don't.
**[01:27] kiri**
Kyotaro...
**[01:28] kiri**
Aren't you a little worried
you're forgetting refrigerators?
**[01:33] kyo**
I feel refreshed.
**[01:37] man**
Shuzenji-senpai!
**[01:38] dogo**
Don't fall asleep in the bath!
**[01:41] dogo**
Senpai!
**[01:43] karl**
H-Help!
***SIGN*** HAPPY Ice Cream
***SIGN*** Year 3 Class C
**[03:28] una**
Seems like we're enemies now, huh, Nanao?
**[03:31] waku**
I guess that's what it shakes out to, yeah.
**[03:33] una**
The magic knights who bring happiness, huh?
**[03:35] (Flashback) all**
Happy Kiss!
**[03:39] waku**
Right back at you.
**[03:40] (Flashback) all**
Furanui Knights...
**[03:41] (Flashback) all**
Edelstein!
**[03:45] una**
Well, you seem to be having a lot of fun.
**[03:48] waku**
I guess.
**[03:49] waku**
You need to have fun when you're
looking after your juniors.
**[03:53] una**
You say you're looking after them,
but I know you're probably messing with them.
**[03:57] waku**
I guess you must have
your hands full, too, huh?
**[03:59] una**
Well, my kids are working hard.
**[04:03] una**
When the kids are working hard,
you've gotta have their backs.
***SIGN*** Student Council Room
***SIGN*** Instructions 1: An orderly lifestyle! 2: Incredible productivity! 3: Solidarity in following the ruler's commands!
**[04:16] fura**
An orderly lifestyle.
**[04:18] fura**
Incredible productivity.
**[04:20] fura**
Solidarity in following the ruler's commands.
**[04:23] fura**
These are Binan High School's new doctrines.
**[04:26] fura**
In order to enforce them, first we need
to formulate stricter school rules.
**[04:30] ata**
I'm sorry to say it, but the school
rules may not be sufficient.
**[04:34] una**
Yeah.
**[04:35] una**
Even if we make them stricter,
I doubt anyone will follow them.
**[04:39] ---**
True, true.
**[04:40] fura**
What did you say?!
**[04:43] masa**
Aw, don't get mad.
**[04:46] masa**
Here, Maasa cookies!
**[04:47] fura**
M-Maasa cookies?
**[04:50] shiro**
I make them really good.
**[04:52] fura**
W-Well, if you insist...
**[04:57] fura**
Delicious!
**[04:59] shira**
You can have as many as you want.
**[05:03] fura**
I detect the scent of unhappiness nearby.
**[05:11] all**
See you tomorrow, Yoshida, Kogawa!
**[05:16] haku**
Sorry...
**[05:18] yama**
Oh, it's you.
**[05:20] yama**
I think the name was...
**[05:24] yama**
Yamazaki, Tanaka! See you later!
**[05:26] yama**
Take care on the way home!
**[05:28] yama**
Do your homework! Brush your teeth!
**[05:30] yama**
What is this, elementary school?
***SIGN*** Usui Hajime
**[05:37] sign**
*I see...*
**[05:38] sign**
*No one in this school can say my name.*
**[05:42] sign**
* I've always struggled to make an impression,*
* ever since I was a child.*
**[05:45] sign**
*But I'm so invisible,*
**[05:48] sign**
*everyone just calls me "you" and "hey there."*
**[05:53] sign**
*Why won't anyone say my name?*
**[05:56] sign**
*Why won't they remember it?*
**[05:57] sign**
*Why won't they* try *to learn my name?!*
**[06:00] man**
Here. Strawberry and mango, is it?
**[06:02] man**
Thank you!
**[06:04] sign**
Don't forget to close the door!
**[06:05] haku**
Hey there. Coming in.
**[06:07] man**
Oh, the kid from Binan High.
**[06:09] man**
I've been waiting.
**[06:10] man**
I need to head out for a bit.
**[06:12] man**
Could you hold down the fort?
**[06:14] haku**
Right...
**[06:15] man**
Well, time to get changed!
***SIGN*** Usui Hajime
**[06:22] haku**
* Even at my job, no one*
* calls me by my name.*
**[06:26] haku**
*Even though it's written right here!*
**[06:28] haku**
*It's right freaking here!*
**[06:32] una**
Excuse me. Soft-serve please.
**[06:34] una**
Right! Coming up...
**[06:37] una**
Hey, aren't you the student council?
**[06:40] una**
Which should I get?
***SIGN*** Ultra Kiwi Spicy Mixed Soft-Serve
***SIGN*** Ultra Trend Mix Southern Mango
***SIGN*** Rush Fluffy Ultra Mix Green Tea
***SIGN*** Super Double Sweet Strawberry Mix
**[06:44] ma**
I want the one with strawberry stuff!
**[06:48] ma**
Okay.
**[06:48] ma**
The super double sweet strawberry mix, right?
**[06:53] una**
Are you the type who always reads the
exact name of everything on the menu?
**[06:58] haku**
Y-Yeah... Because, I mean,
those are their names.
**[07:03] una**
Yeah, I hear you. Totally.
**[07:05] masa**
G-Good point.
**[07:08] ata**
The humans of this world avert their eyes
from the truth and substitute whatever suits them.
**[07:13] ata**
Wouldn't you like to set them straight?
**[07:16] haku**
I would, but...
**[07:19] fura**
Then I'll give you that role.
**[07:24] fura**
Druck!
**[07:25] fura**
Mich!
**[07:26] fura**
Hart!
**[07:28] fura**
An!
**[07:40] man**
Huh? He's gone.
**[07:42] man**
Hey, you kids!
**[07:43] man**
Have you seen our part-timer anywhere?
**[07:46] shi**
He has been assigned the role
of demonstrating our king's power.
**[07:50] man**
But I need him around!
**[07:53] mas**
Well, what are we supposed to do about it?
**[07:56] man**
If you kids took our part-timer somewhere,
**[07:59] man**
I'll need one of you to fill in for him.
**[08:01] man**
Fill in?
**[08:04] ma**
Unazuki-senpai?
**[08:05] una**
Well, it must be done.
**[08:07] man**
You'll do it? Thank you!
**[08:10] man**
Well, good luck!
**[08:11] man**
Yahoo!
**[08:14] ata**
Unazuki-san, are you sure about this?
**[08:16] una**
Yeah. Sure am!
**[08:17] ma**
What a shock!
**[08:21] una**
What do you think?
**[08:22] ata**
What do we think? Well...
**[08:24] ma**
Senpai, it looks great on you! Really good!
**[08:28] dogo**
Hey, the student council.
**[08:30] dogo**
The Defense Club!
**[08:31] dogo**
You guys are serving ice cream?
**[08:35] dogo**
Hey, have you got a part-time job here?
**[08:37] una**
Step right up!
**[08:48] una**
Well, can I get you guys some soft-serve?
**[08:51] waku**
Sounds good!
**[08:52] waku**
Let's get some, everyone.
**[08:54] waku**
Um... This.
**[08:57] waku**
Taiju, I'll take one of those.
**[08:58] una**
Got it!
**[09:02] shu**
Then I'll have that one!
**[09:04] shu**
Thanks!
**[09:05] shu**
And I'll have this one!
**[09:06] shu**
Righto!
**[09:06] dogo**
Then I'll have this one!
**[09:08] dogo**
And I'll have this one!
**[09:09] dogo**
I'll have this strawberry one!
**[09:13] shu**
This is delicious!
**[09:14] ---**
I want this one.
**[09:15] ---**
Alright.
**[09:17] una**
Ata, go on, choose.
**[09:19] ata**
No... Thank you.
**[09:21] wa**
Don't be like that! Here you are!
**[09:24] ata**
I-If you insist.
**[09:27] dogo**
Senpai, Senpai! Ryoma-senpai!
**[09:30] dogo**
How did we all end up eating ice
cream together like pals, exactly?
**[09:34] kiri**
This soft-serve is great!
**[09:36] man**
I'm curious to know why
Unazuki-senpai and Wakura-senpai
**[09:40] man**
are so good at making soft-serve ice cream.
**[09:44] kiri**
Oh, that's right.
**[09:45] kiri**
You first years don't know about that yet.
**[09:47] kiri**
The cultural festival soft-serve legend.
**[09:49] dogo**
What's that?
**[09:51] kiri**
I've only heard the rumors, myself...
**[09:53] kiri**
Right, Kyotaro?
**[09:55] shu**
So good...
**[09:58] man**
What are you talking about?
**[10:01] kiri**
From what I've been told,
**[10:02] kiri**
when Unazuki-senpai and
Wakura-senpai were first years,
**[10:06] kiri**
their names were drawn to run the
soft-serve stall at the cultural festival.
***SIGN*** Soft-Serve Ice Cream
**[10:11] sign**
With those two making soft-serve together,
the stall did big business!
**[10:16] an**
I never knew they'd done something like that.
**[10:21] dogo**
So many people!
**[10:26] shu**
I've got this pounding in my head...
**[10:28] shu**
Oh, I know that!
**[10:30] shu**
The cold makes your head pound, right?
**[10:32] mon**
Excuse me!
**[10:34] mon**
Don't you know what that
phenomenon is called?
***SIGN*** Wakura Nanao Born September 17th Blood Type: AB Virgo Hobbies: Tea Likes: Japanese sweets, teasing others
**[10:44] sign**
Hey, did you hear me?
**[10:46] sign**
What's the phenomenon called where eating
cold things makes your head pound?
**[10:50] dogo**
I never even thought about it...
**[10:50] shu**
Ah, it still hurts.
**[10:53] kai**
It's known as... an ice cream headache!
**[10:56] kai**
That's the official medical term, too!
**[11:00] waku**
So what?
**[11:02] kiri**
Oh, Wakura-senpai.
**[11:03] kiri**
Don't you have to stay behind the counter?
**[11:06] waku**
We sold so much we ran out of ingredients.
**[11:08] dogo**
Just like the cultural festival
soft-serve legend!
**[11:11] shu**
Oh, the pounding's gone away.
**[11:13] kiri**
Glad to hear it, Kyotaro. Shall we, then?
**[11:16] kyo**
Yeah. Let's hit the Kurotama Bath.
**[11:19] mon**
Hey, wait! You guys!
**[11:21] mon**
Why are you leaving?
**[11:23] shu**
Why?
**[11:24] man**
Because we're done here, that's why.
**[11:35] mon**
Then... do you know the name of this?
**[11:41] shu**
Oh, that thing they put in books.
**[11:43] mon**
Don't call it "that thing"! Its
official name is "pagemarker"!
**[11:48] mon**
Next up... this!
**[11:53] kiri**
The thing you serve curry in?
**[11:54] mon**
It's called a gravy boat!
**[11:56] mon**
And these?
**[11:59] dogo**
Hey, those green crinkly things!
**[12:01] mon**
Wrong! They're called baran!
**[12:03] mon**
How about this?
**[12:06] man**
The tool you use for goldfish-scooping.
**[12:08] man**
The official name is...
**[12:10] mon**
Poi!
**[12:11] man**
Correct.
**[12:12] mon**
Yeah! I got it!
**[12:14] mon**
Wait! I'm the one asking the questions here!
**[12:16] mon**
Now, these!
**[12:19] kiri**
The things you use to dig out crab meat!
**[12:21] mon**
No, they're—
**[12:25] shu**
So, what's the point?
**[12:27] dogo**
I know!
**[12:29] dogo**
Are you one of those things they use
to hold bread bags and stuff shut?
**[12:32] mon**
Oh, here we go again!
It's the phrase I hear all the time!
**[12:35] mon**
That's right!
**[12:36] mon**
When anyone looks at me,
**[12:38] mon**
they just say, "Oh, it's that thing
they use to hold bread bags shut."
**[12:42] mon**
Why "that thing"?
**[12:42] mon**
Is "that thing" enough for you?
**[12:43] kiri**
We've got ourselves a real
pain in the butt here.
**[12:46] shu**
Yeah...
**[12:47] shu**
Let's have the student council
deal with whatever his problem is...
**[12:51] dogo**
Hey, they're gone!
**[12:53] kiri**
So... we have to deal with him ourselves?
**[12:55] dogo**
Can we not?
**[12:57] man**
It does seem troublesome...
**[12:58] waku**
What'll we do, Kyotaro-kun?
**[13:03] shu**
Good question...
**[13:05] mon**
Well... I see you're still struggling
to figure out my name, eh?
**[13:10] all**
No, no, no.
**[13:19] mon**
It's "bag closure"!
**[13:22] shu**
So?
**[13:23] mon**
What?!
**[13:24] mon**
Aren't you elated to hear my proper name?
**[13:27] mon**
Doesn't it make you happy?
**[13:29] shu**
Sorry, but no.
**[13:32] man**
Yeah, not at all.
**[13:33] dogo**
Nope, nope, nothing.
**[13:38] mon**
How can it be...
**[13:41] mon**
In that case, I, Bag Closure Monster,
**[13:44] mon**
shall cure your depraved souls!
**[13:50] mon**
Tyndall!
**[13:55] mon**
The phenomenon in which
light warps when passing
**[13:57] mon**
through tree leaves is known
as the Tyndall effect!
**[14:02] mon**
Are you listening?!
**[14:04] mon**
It's the Tyndall effect!
**[14:05] mon**
Tyndall!
**[14:09] mon**
Tyndall! Tyndall! Tyndall!
**[14:15] mon**
I think he just likes saying "Tyndall"...
**[14:25] mon**
The warped light...
**[14:31] karl**
He's wallowing in the depths
of anger and suffering!
**[14:35] karl**
We need to make him happy!
**[14:49] ---**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[15:27] karl**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[15:40] karl**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[15:53] karl**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[16:07] karl**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[16:19] karl**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[16:25] karl**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[16:27] karl**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[16:29] karl**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[16:32] karl**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[16:34] karl**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[16:37] karl**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
***SIGN*** Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[16:45] ---**
Knights contract complete!
**[16:48] kiri**
He made us do the full routine again...
**[16:50] ban**
It appears we have no choice in the matter.
**[16:54] kai**
Then I'll give you this!
**[16:57] kai**
Pablo Diego José Francisco de
Paula Juan Nepomuceno María
**[17:01] kai**
de los Remedios Cipriano de la
Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso!
**[17:09] dogo**
What's that?!
**[17:11] man**
It's the real name of the
painter Pablo Picasso!
**[17:13] wa**
Yes, they say his name was so long,
he couldn't even say it himself!
**[17:18] kai**
That's right!
**[17:20] kai**
You didn't know it, did you?
**[17:21] kai**
Boy, you're stupid!
**[17:24] dogo**
Seriously, what's the point of all this?
**[17:26] mon**
I really hate people who don't
know the proper names of things,
**[17:29] mon**
and just muddle through without caring!
**[17:32] mon**
My name is not "that thing"!
**[17:34] mon**
It's bag closure!
**[17:36] mon**
Why won't anyone call me by my name?
**[17:38] mon**
I remember everyone else's name!
**[17:42] kiri**
Oh, I know this.
**[17:43] kiri**
Is it the "I remember everyone's birthday,
**[17:45] kiri**
but no one remembers mine" resentment thing?
**[17:50] kai**
You...
**[17:52] kai**
You said "the thing" again!
**[17:54] kai**
Hey! Hey!
**[17:55] man**
Kirishima-senpai, please
don't make him angry.
**[17:57] kai**
Are you listening? Hey!
**[17:59] kiri**
Huh? Did I upset him?
**[18:01] kiri**
I wonder why, Kyotaro...
**[18:04] kiri**
Kyotaro's missing again!
**[18:07] mon**
You're all really going to pay now!
**[18:10] mon**
Super Magical Bag Closure Beam!
**[18:13] shu**
But... are names really that important?
**[18:18] shu**
This thing apparently has
some crazy long name,
**[18:21] shu**
but nobody says it.
**[18:23] mon**
Yeah, and what I hate is
people who just accept that!
**[18:27] shu**
But
**[18:30] ---**
everyone still thinks it's delicious,
**[18:31] shu**
and they come back to order it again.
**[18:34] shu**
Isn't it better for people to think you're great,
rather than to remember your name?
**[18:40] shu**
With you, too...
**[18:42] shu**
Everyone remembers the thing they
use to keep bread bags closed.
**[18:46] shu**
I think that's much better than
everyone knowing your name,
**[18:50] shu**
but no one knowing what you're good for.
**[18:56] karl**
My knights of happiness...
**[18:58] karl**
Lift his unhappiness and make him happy!
**[19:03] shu**
That was delicious.
**[19:06] karl**
Now, use your power to make him happy!
**[19:09] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:10] karl**
Yes!
**[19:11] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:12] karl**
Yes!
**[19:12] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:13] karl**
Yes!
**[19:14] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:15] karl**
Yes!
**[19:16] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:17] karl**
Yes!
**[19:17] karl**
Let's happy hour!
**[19:20] karl**
Happy and Turn!
**[19:33] karl**
Return to happiness!
**[19:36] karl**
Happy and Turn!
**[19:47] mon**
If I'm "that," if I'm "me"...
Maybe it's okay either way.
**[19:55] shu**
Happy End!
**[19:57] karl**
Happy Powder!
**[20:07] haku**
Huh? What was I doing here...
**[20:10] kiri**
Hey, you're that third year.
**[20:12] kiri**
What was it again...?
**[20:14] haku**
I'm Usui Hajime.
**[20:18] haku**
But it's okay. You don't
have to remember my name.
**[20:21] haku**
As long as you don't forget
that I was here at Binan High.
**[20:25] shu**
No, I'll try to remember.
**[20:28] shu**
Um, what was your name, again?
**[20:31] haku**
No, seriously, it's fine...
**[20:34] haku**
Excuse me!
**[20:36] haku**
So long!
**[20:38] karl**
Everyone's happy again today!
**[20:41] karl**
Now, let's go home!
**[20:52] shu**
I'm exhausted. Can't move.
**[20:55] man**
I've just ended up saying "the thing" again.
**[20:58] man**
Kirishima-senpai.
**[20:59] man**
If you say "the thing" again,
**[21:01] man**
that guy's going to show up
and tell you to say the proper name.
**[21:06] dogo**
Taishi, you ended up not
remembering his name either!
**[21:09] karl**
Everyone, look, look!
**[21:11] karl**
I made a Karls Original happi coat!
**[21:14] karl**
Wear this happi and say...
**[21:15] karl**
Are you happy?
**[21:17] karl**
Get it?!
**[21:20] waku**
I'm overheating.
**[21:22] waku**
I think I'll get out now.
**[21:23] waku**
Same here.
**[21:26] karl**
C'mon, it's a happi! Hey! Hey!
**[21:31] usu**
Thank you for coming.
**[21:38] waku**
Could I have one of those?
**[21:39] usu**
Yes!
**[21:40] una**
I'd like one of those, too.
**[21:43] usu**
Right! Thanks for coming!
**[21:54] waku**
Another rough day, huh?
**[21:56] una**
Same to you.
**[21:58] una**
How long is this gonna go on?
**[22:00] waku**
Who can say?
**[22:03] una**
You say that, but you seem
to be really enjoying it.
**[22:07] waku**
Certainly not.
**[22:15] waku**
Well, see you again, enemy.
**[22:17] una**
Sure thing, enemy.
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** It's A Wonderful HAPPY
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "It's A Wonderful HAPPY"!
***SIGN*** There's gold buried on Mt. Binan?! And for some reason, the Defense Club is digging it up...
***SIGN*** Meanwhile, the student council just watches. What will they find in the end?!
***SIGN***
# 4 - It's A Wonderful HAPPY
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] yone**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
***SIGN*** It's A Wonderful HAPPY
**[01:40] ban**
There is! There is, I tell you, there is!
**[01:42] dogo**
There is not! I'm telling you, there's not!
**[01:45] dogo**
There is!
**[01:45] dogo**
There's not!
**[01:46] waku**
Looks like another fun
little pointless argument.
**[01:46] dogo**
There is!
**[01:47] dogo**
There's not!
**[01:47] ---**
There is!
**[01:48] dogo**
Not, not, not, not, not!
**[01:50] dogo**
Is, is, is, is, is!
**[01:50] kiri**
That's close friends for you.
**[01:52] ban**
I'm telling you... there is, absolutely!
**[01:56] dogo**
I'm telling you, there's not, no question!
**[01:58] karl**
Oh? This atmosphere is less than happy...
**[02:01] waku**
It's just a difference of opinion,
**[02:03] waku**
over an utterly trivial subject.
**[02:05] kiri**
The short version is, they're arguing about
whether there's buried treasure or not.
**[02:09] karl**
Why would you dig up gold?
**[02:10] karl**
Just make some with magic!
**[02:12] kiri**
Come on...
**[02:14] ban**
Kirishima-senpai, are you
in the "treasure" camp?
**[02:17] dogo**
You're in the "no treasure" camp, right?
**[02:18] kiri**
I don't really...
**[02:19] ban**
You're in the "treasure" camp, right?
**[02:20] dogo**
The "no treasure" camp, right?
**[02:21] waku**
I suspect he's more in the "doesn't care" camp.
**[02:24] kiri**
That's it! That's just how I feel!
**[02:26] shu**
But if there was buried treasure,
what would happen to it?
**[02:30] kiri**
He's awake.
**[02:31] waku**
Were you listening in your sleep?
**[02:33] shu**
I heard it from deep in my stupor, I guess.
**[02:35] shu**
It resonated somewhere
inside of me, I guess...
**[02:39] shu**
But what would happen if
you found buried treasure?
**[02:42] kiri**
Would it be treated as lost property?
**[02:44] waku**
Wouldn't it belong to the state?
**[02:47] waku**
Or to whoever owns the local land...
**[02:50] shu**
Though, if we're dividing
into "cool" and "ugh" camps,
**[02:52] shu**
I'm in the "it would be
cool if it existed" camp.
**[02:55] ban**
Exactly! That's precisely my point!
**[02:58] ban**
It's about whether it's cool or not!
**[03:00] ban**
There's a non-zero percent
chance that it exists.
**[03:03] ban**
That's where the sense of adventure comes in!
**[03:05] ban**
And that's what makes it cool!
**[03:08] dogo**
The likelihood is still
*pretty much* zero, though.
**[03:11] dogo**
I think they're just digging
because it means big ratings!
**[03:14] man**
And you've just dug your
own grave there, Ichiro.
**[03:17] man**
The fact it gets ratings
**[03:19] man**
is proof that a lot of people
have the same sense of adventure that I do!
**[03:22] dogo**
That's unrelated to the point of whether the
buried treasure actually exists or not!
**[03:26] dogo**
You're moving the goalposts!
**[03:28] dogo**
The question is if it exists or not!
**[03:29] dogo**
And it absolutely *does not* exist!
**[03:32] ban**
No, it does exist!
**[03:33] ban**
Does not!
**[03:34] shu**
Aren't their arguments fun?
**[03:34] ban**
Does too!
**[03:36] bei**
It's not fun at all!
**[03:38] bei**
A-As far as I'm concerned,
there's no buried treasure!
**[03:41] bei**
And that's my only word on the matter!
**[03:45] shu**
He ran out, covered in soap suds...
**[03:47] waku**
I guess he didn't like the
talk about buried treasure.
**[03:51] dogo**
Hey, isn't that the transfer student...
***SIGN*** Yonekura Kingo
**[03:59] (Flashback) sign**
Hello.
**[04:00] (Flashback) sign**
My name is Yonekura Kingo.
**[04:02] sign**
Yonekura Kingo!
**[04:04] (Flashback) sign**
*Not* "Maizo Kingo"!
**[04:10] [SONG] sign**
Buried Treasure (maizo kin), Go!
**[04:13] shu**
Oh, it's started already. *Buried Treasure Go*.
**[04:16] ban**
That's right. Today's a
two hour special, right?
**[04:19] shu**
Was it?
**[04:22] ban**
Yonekura...
**[04:23] yone**
I came to the public bath to avoid that
aggravating thing on the TV, and yet...
***SIGN*** Mysterious Staircase
Discovered
**[04:29] yone**
I guess I can't escape the
curse of the buried treasure!
**[04:34] kiri**
Buried treasure curse, huh?
That sounds pretty bad.
**[04:38] kiri**
Did one of your ancestors
bury treasure somewhere?
**[04:40] yone**
It's nothing so serious.
**[04:42] dogo**
Then... do you get teased
about your name a lot?
**[04:45] dogo**
Like, "Hey, Maizo Kin-go!"
**[04:49] yone**
It's nothing so shallow, either.
**[04:53] yone**
What I can't stand is... my father...
**[04:56] yone**
He gave me this name because of
his sense of dreams and adventure.
**[05:00] kiri**
What?
**[05:02] yone**
My father...
**[05:04] yone**
He's a freelance director who pursues UMA,
buried treasure, and other mysterious things.
***SIGN*** Mt. Binan
**[05:09] sign**
We even moved here in his
search for buried treasure.
**[05:12] (Flashback) dad**
Kingo, I think we'll get to live
in the next city for a long time.
**[05:17] (Flashback) dad**
I've got a good feeling about it.
**[05:19] (Flashback) dad**
This time, we're hitting the jackpot!
**[05:21] (Flashback) yone**
Dad!
**[05:28] yone**
He's just single-mindedly chasing his dream.
**[05:31] shu**
So he came here to dig up treasure?
**[05:33] yone**
Yes.
**[05:34] yone**
The dig shoots last six months at least,
**[05:37] yone**
and a year or two at most.
**[05:39] yone**
Because of that, I've had to
change schools eight times.
**[05:43] dogo**
No way!
**[05:44] man**
Your father can't just leave
you at home when he travels?
**[05:47] yone**
It's just me and him, so...
**[05:49] yone**
I hear that, long ago, my mother encouraged
his dreams and adventures, but...
**[05:53] yone**
It seems that from the time he named
me Kingo, her heart began to break.
**[05:59] yone**
The day I was born, my father
was off digging up treasure.
**[06:04] yone**
He wasn't there the day I started crawling.
**[06:07] yone**
Naturally, he was AWOL when
I took my first steps.
**[06:11] yone**
Even the day I got pneumonia and almost died,
**[06:14] [SONG] dad**
Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
**[06:15] yone**
he was digging for treasure in some hole
where he couldn't get a phone signal!
**[06:20] yone**
As a result, my first words were...
**[06:23] (Flashback) kid**
Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
**[06:29] yone**
That seems to have been her breaking point.
**[06:32] yone**
That's when my mother left.
**[06:34] man**
I'm sorry. I really
shouldn't have asked...
**[06:38] yone**
It's okay.
**[06:40] yone**
I'm just so glad you heard me out.
**[06:43] yone**
I thought it would be too hard to understand,
**[06:44] yone**
so I've never told anyone before.
**[06:47] dogo**
I guess it would be hard to explain.
**[06:50] waku**
But your story is completely understandable.
**[06:53] waku**
I mean, it just makes sense.
**[06:55] kiri**
It must be pretty rough
going for you, Yonekura-kun.
**[06:58] yone**
Lately, it's gone beyond rough.
**[07:01] yone**
It's more like something's
boiling up inside me...
**[07:06] yone**
I'm very sorry for my outburst earlier!
**[07:13] karl**
Happy! Happy!
**[07:17] stu**
Hey, I hear the buried treasure
shoot has started up on Mt. Binan.
**[07:22] stu**
What a laugh! There's no treasure up there.
**[07:24] stu**
You think those TV people really
believe the crap they peddle?
**[07:27] stu**
They know it's all bull, but they go along
with the dig because it's their job, right?
**[07:32] yone**
That's not true!
**[07:34] yone**
Some people dig because they
really believe it exists!
**[07:36] sut**
Are you kidding?
**[07:37] sut**
That's pretty cringe-worthy...
**[07:39] yone**
That's true.
**[07:40] yone**
It is indeed cringe-worthy.
**[07:42] ---**
That's why I say with confidence:
Buried treasure does not exist!
**[07:48] ---**
But the worst part of it all...
**[07:52] ---**
...is you people who talk about it and watch
it on TV, without any sense of responsibility!
**[07:58] stu**
What's with you, Yonekura?
**[08:00] stu**
Since when does watching TV
require a sense of responsibility?
**[08:03] stu**
C'mon, let's go.
**[08:09] yone**
Wh-What do you people want?
**[08:11] fura**
Your resentment is genuine.
**[08:14] masa**
Yeah, I agree!
**[08:16] una**
I can tell. It's natural
that you'd be resentful.
**[08:19] ata**
It's irresponsible to watch
TV just because it amuses you.
**[08:22] ata**
Would you like to correct that?
**[08:26] yone**
Y-Yes, I would.
**[08:32] yone**
Die Verwandlung!
**[08:35] yone**
That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
**[08:38] yone**
Ritter Diamant!
**[08:41] yone**
Affection and comfort!
**[08:43] yone**
Ritter Rosenquarz!
**[08:47] yone**
Noble and virtuous!
**[08:48] yone**
Ritter Amethyst!
**[08:52] yone**
We are the Furanui Knights...
**[08:54] yone**
Edelstein!
**[08:57] yone**
Druck!
**[08:58] yone**
Mich!
**[08:59] yone**
Hart!
**[09:01] yone**
An!
***SIGN*** Manza Taishi Born September 30th Blood Type: A Libra Hobbies: Reading Likes: Reciting trivia, blueberries
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[09:18] kiri**
I hear the Mt. Binan buried
treasure shoot is starting today.
**[09:23] ban**
He reacts to buried treasure, at least.
**[09:25] dogo**
Even though it totally doesn't exist.
**[09:28] waku**
That reminds me.
**[09:29] waku**
We buried a time capsule on Mt. Binan when
we were in elementary school, didn't we?
**[09:33] kiri**
Yeah, we did that in my year, too!
**[09:36] waku**
I've completely forgotten what
I put in it now, of course...
**[09:42] ban**
What's wrong, Ichiro?
**[09:43] dogo**
N-Nothing...
**[09:45] dogo**
I-It's obvious there's no
buried treasure up there...
**[09:48] dogo**
B-But why don't we go to watch the shoot?
**[09:51] ban**
I knew you'd be interested.
**[09:53] dogo**
Shut up, Taishi.
**[09:55] shu**
Let's go. I kind of want to see it.
**[09:58] kiri**
Kyotaro?
**[09:59] kiri**
Isn't this usually his afternoon nap-time?
**[10:03] waku**
Let's all go and see, then.
**[10:05] karl**
Sounds great!
**[10:07] karl**
We'll have a better chance of making someone
happy there than by hanging around in here!
**[10:11] dogo**
Um... Nanao-senpai, you're going too?
**[10:14] waku**
Do you have a problem with that?
**[10:15] dogo**
No, no! Not at all...
**[10:22] cam**
We are rolling!
**[10:23] so**
Sound okay.
**[10:25] ad**
Three... two...
**[10:28] kin**
Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
**[10:31] kin**
Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
**[10:34] rep**
So, it's begun.
**[10:36] rep**
The director is taking the
pickax in his own hand
**[10:38] rep**
in pursuit of the dream of buried treasure!
**[10:41] kiri**
Kyotaro?
**[10:44] shu**
Hey.
**[10:45] shu**
Give it to me straight.
Is there really buried treasure here?
**[10:49] pro**
Oh, well... you know I
can't say that there isn't.
**[10:52] pro**
I have our ratings to worry about, after all!
**[10:56] shu**
Does that mean...?
**[10:57] dogo**
He's basically saying there isn't.
**[10:59] ban**
No, a miracle could still happen!
**[11:02] ban**
Miracles are miracles because
they *do* sometimes happen!
**[11:05] waku**
But that Yonekura Kingo kid is the
one jerked around by the "miracle."
**[11:12] kiri**
When you put it that way, it is pretty sad...
**[11:15] pro**
Oh, I know!
**[11:16] pro**
We're a little bit short-handed.
**[11:19] pro**
Could I ask you to turn your youthful
passion towards digging up treasure?
**[11:24] dogo**
No. I don't have any youthful passion.
**[11:27] dogo**
I'm also in the "no treasure" camp.
**[11:30] shu**
Let's try it.
**[11:30] dogo**
Seriously, Kyotaro-senpai?!
**[11:32] shu**
I mean, the digging itself
sounds like a pain in the neck,
**[11:35] shu**
but if we do find something
I could sleep the rest of my life away.
**[11:39] kiri**
Now that's a shock! To see Kyotaro
getting fired up over something...
**[11:42] ban**
I'm starting to want to dig it up so I
can prove that buried treasure exists!
**[11:47] dogo**
Are you serious?
**[11:49] dogo**
This is going in a very bad direction...
**[11:51] dogo**
If anyone finds it...
**[11:54] shu**
What's wrong, Chiro?
**[11:55] dogo**
Oh, nothing...
**[11:56] dogo**
I'll dig, too!
**[12:06] shiro**
I'm shocked to see them
performing physical labor.
**[12:10] ata**
They have nothing better to do.
**[12:12] una**
But it means my company doesn't have
to hire more people, so that's good.
**[12:16] fura**
And I'm certain *he* will appear.
**[12:19] una**
Yes.
**[12:26] kiri**
It says "Unazuki Construction."
**[12:28] pro**
That's our sponsor this go-round.
**[12:31] ban**
Hey, Ichiro.
**[12:32] ban**
What are you so worked up about?
**[12:34] dogo**
What does it matter to you?!
**[12:36] waku**
You didn't put something in the time
capsule you don't want anyone to see, did you?
**[12:41] dogo**
C-Certainly not!
**[12:44] shu**
I found a time capsule from
Tai-Tai and Chiro's class year.
**[12:46] kiri**
Really? Sounds fun! Open it!
**[12:49] dogo**
Hey, you can't do that!
**[12:51] dogo**
We're supposed to open it with the
graduation committee when we turn twenty!
**[12:55] shu**
No big deal. We'll just bury it again after.
**[12:57] kiri**
Yeah, yeah!
**[12:58] ban**
I don't really care, myself.
**[13:00] dogo**
Hey, Taishi!
**[13:02] waku**
If he wants it to stay closed so bad,
we absolutely have to open it.
**[13:06] kiri**
There it is! Wakura-senpai's super-sadism!
**[13:09] shu**
Then...
**[13:11] shu**
"My dream for the future. Dogo Ichiro."
**[13:17] kiri**
Let's see...
**[13:18] kiri**
"In elementary school, I always
played the 'cheerful idiot'..."
**[13:23] ban**
"I was planning to act more self-conscious
in middle school, but..."
**[13:28] ban**
"Just recently, I met this amazing
person two grades above me..."
**[13:33] ban**
"He told me, 'Never stop being as
straightforward and cheerful as you are.'"
**[13:38] ban**
"I'll never forget the fervor
in his gaze in that moment."
**[13:43] ban**
"That person's name was...
**[13:45] ban**
Nanao-senpai."
**[13:47] ban**
"Senpai, please keep your eyes on me forever."
**[13:52] ban**
For real, Ichiro?
**[13:54] ban**
Wakura-senpai, you did a cruel thing.
**[13:56] waku**
I forgot. Sorry.
**[13:59] dogo**
No... I'm glad you forgot.
**[14:03] ban**
Yeah, I wouldn't want anyone
to see this, either.
**[14:04] ban**
That's why I wanted to dig
it up and erase it forever!
**[14:08] ban**
But now we've seen it.
**[14:11] shu**
Hey.
**[14:12] shu**
I found one from Wakura-senpai's
grade, too.
**[14:15] kiri**
Hey, let's have a look!
**[14:18] kiri**
Wakura-senpai, did you
write letters to everyone?
**[14:21] kiri**
Very conscientious...
**[14:23] kiri**
"Aizawa-kun, I hope your
bed-wetting habit clears up."
**[14:27] kiri**
"As promised, I never told anyone about it."
**[14:31] kiri**
You wrote it down for posterity?!
**[14:34] waku**
I remember now!
**[14:35] waku**
I wrote down everyone's darkest secrets.
**[14:38] waku**
I figured by the time we're twenty,
the statute of limitations would be up.
**[14:41] kiri**
He's been a super-sadist since he was a kid.
**[14:44] ban**
What other kinds of things did he write?
**[14:46] kiri**
Let's see...
**[14:48] kiri**
"Ito-kun, remember how you wore
that yellow-stained gym uniform?"
**[14:52] kiri**
"At least the smell of your
sweat was very invigorating..."
**[14:56] kiri**
Hey, that won't make him feel any better!
**[14:58] dogo**
But it really is cool the way
you say that stuff straight!
**[15:03] ban**
Hey. What are you trying to
slip into the conversation?
**[15:06] dogo**
No, it's not like that!
**[15:08] dogo**
It's not like that at all!
**[15:11] dogo**
It's not like that at all, not at all!
**[15:13] dogo**
Wait, what am I saying?
**[15:17] kyo**
This is getting kind of fun.
**[15:22] kin**
I've found something!
**[15:25] kin**
Look! It's a boot caked with blood and sweat!
**[15:28] kin**
This is proof that someone dug up gold here!
**[15:31] kin**
In other words, there's gold buried here!
**[15:35] kin**
Okay, buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
**[15:38] kin**
Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
**[15:40] kin**
Buried trea—
**[15:40] mon**
That's enough!
**[15:46] rep**
What's this? We didn't find buried treasure!
We found a monster instead!
**[15:50] mon**
There is no buried treasure here!
**[15:52] pro**
Did you plan this twist?
**[15:54] dad**
N-No...
**[15:55] pro**
Ah well, it seems amusing.
**[15:58] mon**
Don't enjoy things in such a lukewarm way!
**[16:01] mon**
It's the existence of people like you
**[16:03] mon**
that keeps brainless and irrelevant
shows like this in existence!
**[16:06] mon**
You make too much brainless TV,
watched by too many brainless people!
**[16:10] kiri**
Isn't TV something you're supposed
to turn your brain off for?
**[16:13] mon**
That's enough!
**[16:15] mon**
No one understands my feelings!
**[16:18] mon**
The feelings of a person
named "Buried Treasure, Go!"
**[16:22] shu**
Is that you, Yonekura-kun?
**[16:24] dad**
Kingo! Are you Kingo?
**[16:27] mon**
That's right! And I'm not
going to take it anymore!
**[16:32] karl**
He's currently suffering in
the depths of resentment!
**[16:36] karl**
We need to make him happy!
**[16:39] karl**
Again?
**[16:40] karl**
As Prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
**[16:43] karl**
Become Karl's Knights Happy
Kiss and save the people!
**[16:54] karl**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[17:05] karl**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[17:16] karl**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[17:25] karl**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[17:33] karl**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[17:42] karl**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[17:47] karl**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[17:49] karl**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[17:52] karl**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[17:54] karl**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[17:57] karl**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[17:59] karl**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[18:03] karl**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[18:10] shu**
Kingo-kun, I don't think you
really hate your father.
**[18:17] shu**
It's seeing him give everything he has
on a dream that might never come true
**[18:21] shu**
that bothers you, right?
**[18:23] shu**
It's hard to watch
him working too hard, isn't it?
**[18:27] mon**
Now that you mention it...
**[18:29] mon**
Once, he used the money he
made on a treasure-digging job
**[18:33] mon**
to buy me a toy.
**[18:37] mon**
There was dirt on the bill...
**[18:40] kiri**
I feel like I've seen this
story somewhere before...
**[18:43] mon**
My father always worked, covered in mud,
without ever complaining...
**[18:48] mon**
He's working so hard,
but it never leads to anything.
**[18:51] mon**
I just watch him get more and more
covered in mud! That's what's so hard!
**[18:55] kin**
Kingo...
**[18:58] karl**
Then we'd better make him happy!
**[19:01] karl**
You, too!
**[19:03] fura**
I won't let it happen!
**[19:05] fura**
Rage, monster!
**[19:13] mon**
Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
**[19:18] mon**
Hit the motherload!
**[19:20] mon**
Hit the motherload!
**[19:27] kiri**
I think he's being manipulated!
**[19:29] shu**
What should we do?
**[19:31] karl**
Make him happy!
**[19:33] karl**
Go on, my knights of happiness!
**[19:37] karl**
This time, lift his unhappiness
and make him happy!
**[19:43] kiri**
Hey, Kyotaro, hurry up.
**[19:45] shu**
If it will end this sooner...
**[19:47] karl**
Use your powers combined to make him happy!
**[19:51] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:52] karl**
Yes!
**[19:52] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:54] karl**
Yes!
**[19:54] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:55] karl**
Yes!
**[19:56] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:57] karl**
Yes!
**[19:57] karl**
Are you happy?
**[19:58] karl**
Yes!
**[19:59] karl**
Let's happy hour!
**[20:02] karl**
Happy and Set!
**[20:16] karl**
Return to happiness!
**[20:18] karl**
Happy and Turn!
**[20:30] mon**
Feels like heaven!
**[20:37] mon**
Happy End!
**[20:38] mon**
Happy Powder!
**[20:43] dad**
Kingo!
**[20:49] shu**
He didn't find buried treasure,
but he did find a hot spring.
**[20:53] pro**
Well done, Yonekura-kun!
**[20:55] pro**
This will be a huge success for our show!
**[20:57] dad**
I'm so lucky!
**[21:08] kiri**
I hear the town's going to work together
**[21:10] kiri**
to build a big bath facility
around that hot spring.
**[21:14] wak**
And the Yonekura family is
getting the credit for it.
**[21:21] dad**
Kingo. Today, you woke me up.
**[21:25] dad**
Thanks to you,
**[21:26] dad**
I'm going to live with my feet
planted firmly on the ground.
**[21:30] dad**
Here, on the same ground where you stand.
**[21:32] kin**
What about the buried treasure?
**[21:34] dad**
Forget it.
**[21:35] dad**
You've given me a new dream.
**[21:37] dad**
Thank you, Kingo.
**[21:43] waku**
That reminds me, Kyotaro-kun...
**[21:45] waku**
What was it that you hid in your pocket?
**[21:47] shu**
Oh. You saw that?
**[21:54] dogo**
You guys were really close, huh?
**[21:56] dogo**
I feel like we were.
**[21:58] ---**
That's right.
**[21:59] ban**
But why is your relationship so strained now?
**[22:03] ban**
Is it?
**[22:05] kiri**
Why not send a copy to Ata,
to remind him of the old days?
**[22:08] shu**
Good idea.
***SIGN*** This was in the time capsule
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** HAPPY and Beautiful
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY and Beautiful"!
***SIGN*** Shirahone Masa holds his Maasa Sweets Festival.
***SIGN*** What's he really after? And what's his connection to Ichiro?
# 5 - HAPPY and Beautiful
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:00] shi**
--
**[00:00] sign**
--
**[00:00] masa**
--
***SIGN*** HAPPY and Beautiful
***SIGN***
Binan High School
**[01:42] kiri**
Isn't that funny?
**[01:47] kiri**
What's with the line?
**[01:49] shu**
Dunno.
**[01:52] shu**
Sleepy...
**[01:53] dogo**
Senpai, senpai, senpai, senpai!
**[01:55] dogo**
Good morning!
**[01:58] kiri**
The morning screamer has arrived.
**[02:01] ban**
Senpai. Good morning.
**[02:05] dogo**
What's all this?
**[02:07] wa**
Hey.
**[02:09] wa**
Ryoma-kun, these are for you.
**[02:11] kiri**
Cookies!
**[02:14] kiri**
Thank y—
**[02:16] kiri**
Y—
**[02:17] kiri**
Y—
**[02:18] dogo**
Nanao-senpai. You're teasing Ryoma-senpai again.
**[02:23] wak**
You really want them?
**[02:25] kiri**
I do!
**[02:26] wak**
Here you go, then.
**[02:28] kiri**
Hooray!
**[02:29] dogo**
But why do you have cookies?
**[02:31] wak**
They're handing them out up there,
so I picked up a pack.
***SIGN*** Maasa Sweets Festival
**[02:44] ma**
Here, a present for you!
**[02:46] ma**
Thank you so much!
**[02:51] ma**
For you, too.
**[02:52] ma**
Handmade cookies using
Maasa's special recipe!
**[02:56] ma**
Th-Thank you so much!
**[03:01] kiri**
Maasa Sweets Festival?
**[03:04] kiri**
You mean... these are...
**[03:05] man**
They're most likely...
**[03:06] man**
No, they're definitely cookies handmade
by Shirahone Maasa of the student council.
**[03:13] man**
But why a sweets festival?
**[03:16] shu**
Dunno. No interest in it.
**[03:20] shu**
Hey, Kyotaro...
**[03:23] mas**
* "Maasa Sweets Festival"*
* is just a lot of kidding.*
**[03:26] mas**
*It's really...*
**[03:28] mas**
Hey!
***SIGN*** Maasa Sweets Festival For lunch, too!
**[03:37] mas**
Don't worry, there's enough
here for everyone!
**[03:40] mas**
Go ahead and eat your fill!
**[03:43] mas**
You can have some, too.
***SIGN*** Sujikawa Honeo
**[03:47] suji**
Thank you very much.
**[03:49] mas**
I made a special cupcake just for you, too.
**[03:52] mas**
It's one of my special sweets,
packed with Echire butter imported from France.
**[03:58] mas**
Now, I'll top it with fresh cream...
**[04:02] stu**
Who is that guy?
**[04:03] stu**
That's Sujikawa.
**[04:04] stu**
The guy we call "chicken carcass."
**[04:06] stu**
Oh, chicken carcass.
**[04:09] masa**
Be quiet.
**[04:11] masa**
It's not nice to say that stuff.
**[04:14] suji**
*He defended me!*
**[04:16] suji**
Well, see you later, Sujikawa-kun.
**[04:18] suji**
R-Right...
**[04:20] suji**
Okay, now! Don't worry,
there's plenty for all you guys, too!
**[04:27] una**
Maasa... what's he thinking?
**[04:30] suji**
It's probably all full of sugar and fat...
**[04:31] ata**
Well, that explains it.
**[04:34] suji**
Surely, if I eat this...
**[04:38] stu**
Me too, me too, me too!
**[04:45] una**
Are you okay?
**[04:47] suji**
Y-Yes...
**[04:49] suji**
I'm sorry.
**[04:53] una**
They call him chicken carcass, but...
**[04:56] una**
He looks like all the stock's
been boiled out of him already.
**[05:01] fura**
Sniff, sniff, sniff...
**[05:03] fura**
I smell the stench of unhappiness again.
**[05:06] fura**
From that direction...
**[05:07] fura**
No... from this direction, too?
***SIGN*** Maasa Sweets Festival
**[05:15] shu**
You know about genetic testing?
**[05:17] dogo**
What about genetic testing?
**[05:18] kiri**
Kyotaro, where did that come from?
**[05:21] shu**
You think it's really accurate?
**[05:23] man**
Yeah. Genetic research has been
making great strides of late.
**[05:29] kiri**
What kinds of things can it tell us?
**[05:31] man**
Diseases you're prone to, facial structure,
**[05:34] man**
whether you're predisposed
to putting on weight or not...
**[05:37] man**
They can read all that
from your genetic makeup.
**[05:41] dogo**
Wow, wow, wow! I wanna try it!
**[05:44] man**
You'd better not.
**[05:45] dogo**
Why not?
**[05:47] waku**
If a child or young person
**[05:49] waku**
with a future still ahead of them is told
"you're genetically predisposed to stupidity,"
**[05:53] waku**
it might be demotivating.
**[05:56] waku**
Right, Ichiro-kun?
**[05:57] dogo**
That's true.
**[06:05] suji**
It all came back up again.
**[06:08] suji**
I guess my stomach is
sensitive to fresh cream.
**[06:11] man**
Hey, want to go to Maasa-san's
sweets buffet later on?
**[06:15] man**
Sure, sure!
**[06:16] man**
I can afford to pack on a few more pounds!
**[06:18] suji**
They're lucky to be so plump...
**[06:23] suji**
* I've never been able to put on weight,*
* even when I was little.*
**[06:27] suji**
* Hoping to gain a few pounds,*
* I even tried protein shakes...*
**[06:34] suji**
*but they disagreed with me and made me sick.*
**[06:36] ---**
My stomach...
**[06:39] suji**
* I tried stuffing myself*
* with various other foods,*
**[06:43] suji**
*but it ended the same way.*
**[06:45] suji**
* I just got sick and ended*
* up thinner than before.*
**[06:49] suji**
* Around that time, people*
* started calling me...*
**[06:54] suji**
* "Nothing but skin and bones left...*
* chicken carcass."*
***SIGN*** We use real chicken carcass!
**[06:59] sign**
* It must be my genes that keep*
* me from putting on weight.*
**[07:03] sign**
*There's no other way around it.*
**[07:06] kiri**
So if you're genetically predisposed to being fat,
dieting can't help you?
**[07:10] man**
Not necessarily... It's just what
your body will tend towards.
**[07:16] dogo**
Why? Why? Why?
**[07:17] man**
Near the end of the Ice Age,
**[07:19] man**
it's said that most of the Northern
Hemisphere was covered in ice.
**[07:23] dogo**
And? And?
**[07:25] man**
There's a theory that this harsh environment
led to the evolution of a conservation gene
**[07:29] man**
that let humans store more energy
from the food they consumed.
**[07:31] man**
Those who inherited that gene are
more inclined towards obesity today.
**[07:38] kiri**
So it's my genes' fault that I like sweets?
**[07:42] wak**
You'd better be careful, Ryoma-kun.
**[07:44] kiri**
Yeah, I'd seriously better!
**[07:46] dogo**
For real, for real, for real!
**[07:47] dogo**
Me, too!
**[07:48] wak**
I wonder where the genes that make you
such a loudmouth come from, Ichiro.
**[07:54] dogo**
Nanao-senpai! Are you interested in my genes?
**[07:58] waku**
Not a bit.
**[07:59] karl**
No worries here.
**[08:01] karl**
There was no Ice Age in Honyala Land.
**[08:04] shu**
I'm starting to think it's better
not to know about your genes.
**[08:14] mas**
Gosh, today made me so tired.
***SIGN*** Maasa's Fatten Up
Pigs Recipe
**[08:19] mas**
The Maasa Sweets Festival was a big lie.
**[08:22] sign**
It's actually the Maasa "Fatten Up,
You Pigs" Festival.
**[08:28] masa**
They didn't contain Echire butter,
but weight-gain butter!
**[08:31] masa**
Now, you pigs...
**[08:33] masa**
Get fat, all of you!
**[08:38] masa**
How long have you been there?
**[08:40] fura**
A while? Well... it's hard to say.
**[08:46] una**
Sounds like your sweets festival
was a roaring success.
**[08:50] masa**
I-It was, thank you...
**[08:53] masa**
I still have a few left,
so I'll go hand those out...
**[09:18] dogo**
Hey, hey, hey!
**[09:19] dogo**
Wait up!
**[09:22] dogo**
You worked really hard on your diet, huh?
**[09:26] dogo**
I honestly didn't recognize you.
**[09:28] dogo**
Since you changed your name to "Maasa," too...
**[09:32] dogo**
I heard you'd gone on a
foreign exchange trip, but...
**[09:43] dogo**
I never thought we'd end
up at the same high school.
**[09:48] masa**
Shut up!
**[09:50] masa**
I don't know you.
**[09:57] kiri**
So those two know each other, huh?
**[10:01] man**
I hear they're cousins.
**[10:03] man**
They went to the same school until
summer break of their sixth year,
**[10:05] man**
when he went to study abroad.
**[10:09] kiri**
But if Ichiro's his cousin
and he's avoiding him...
**[10:12] kiri**
I wonder what happened?
**[10:13] waku**
Maybe he has a secret
he doesn't want anyone to know.
**[10:17] waku**
Secret?
**[10:20] shu**
No interest here.
**[10:21] shu**
Actually, I'm hungry.
**[10:23] kiri**
Want to get something to eat, then?
**[10:25] dogo**
Hey, senpais! Are we getting food?
**[10:28] dogo**
Let's go, let's go!
**[10:34] masa**
Stupid Ichiro...
**[10:41] (Flashback) masa**
Shirahone, you're really something.
**[10:44] (Flashback) masa**
Yeah, no kidding!
**[10:45] (Flashback) masa**
I couldn't do what you do.
***SIGN*** School Play Bunbuku Chagama
**[10:48] (Flashback) kid**
Shirahone'd be perfect, because he's fat!
**[10:51] (Flashback) kid**
And he's got that old-fashioned
name, Magozaemon!
**[10:53] (Flashback) kid**
He's perfect for Bunbuku Chagama!
***SIGN*** Playing Bunbuku Chagama: Shirahone Magozaemon
**[10:57] (Flashback) ichi**
Wow, wow, wow!
**[10:59] (Flashback) ichi**
You got the lead role!
**[11:04] masa**
No, no!
**[11:05] masa**
I'm not that person!
**[11:07] masa**
After making my cutie-pie debut...
**[11:10] masa**
It makes me so annoyed!
**[11:15] masa**
I ate one!
**[11:16] masa**
After I held off on carbs
for four whole years!
**[11:20] masa**
You stupid things!
**[11:29] suji**
I forced myself to eat,
but it all came right back up again...
**[11:35] suji**
You're...
**[11:39] masa**
So you were throwing up the cookies
I worked so hard on, were you?
**[11:44] suji**
S-Sorry...
**[11:45] suji**
I've always had a weak stomach,
and I can't put on weight because of it...
**[11:49] masa**
If you can't put on weight...
then you might as well become a monster!
**[11:54] shi**
Maasa's right.
**[11:55] una**
Yeah.
**[11:57] masa**
Ibusuki-senpai...
**[11:58] masa**
Unazuki-senpai...
**[12:01] shi**
I understand your suffering.
**[12:03] shi**
The people of this world
**[12:05] shi**
envy those who represent the opposite
of what they fear for themselves,
**[12:08] shi**
so they criticize and attack them.
**[12:11] shi**
Wouldn't you like to correct those people?
**[12:18] shi**
We are the Furanui Knights...
**[12:20] shi**
Edelstein!
**[12:23] shi**
Druck!
**[12:24] shi**
Mich!
**[12:25] shi**
Hart!
**[12:27] shi**
An!
***SIGN*** Dogo Ichiro Born August 8th Blood Type: O Leo Hobbies: Card games Likes: Ichiro tarts, fun
**[12:56] shu**
Delicious.
**[12:57] dogo**
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
**[12:59] dogo**
After a hot bath you just
gotta have ramen, huh?
**[13:02] kiri**
It's "after a night of drinking, you
have to finish with ramen," right?
**[13:05] kiri**
Of course, I don't drink,
so I wouldn't know...
**[13:09] kiri**
I wonder why old men want
to eat ramen after drinking.
**[13:14] kiri**
When one imbibes alcohol, sugars are needed
to break down the alcohol in the bloodstream.
**[13:20] kiri**
Thus, blood sugar levels drop, which leads
to additional cravings for carbohydrates.
**[13:26] waku**
Well, ramen soup is full of salt and fat,
and the noodles are basically a carb bomb...
**[13:32] dogo**
I see!
**[13:34] dogo**
So we're getting nutrition from
those chicken carcasses, huh?
**[13:42] shu**
Did you hear something?
**[13:45] kiri**
I think so...
**[13:48] mon**
You people...
**[13:49] mon**
No matter how much I eat,
the nutrition is snatched away...
**[13:53] mon**
Can you understand how I feel, squawk?!
**[13:56] mon**
Squawk, squawk, squawkity-squawk!
**[13:58] ichi**
He's saying something.
**[14:00] kiri**
Another pain in the butt...
**[14:04] shu**
Eating makes me sleepy.
**[14:06] man**
That's because consuming carbs
increases your blood sugar.
**[14:10] man**
Then, to lower your blood sugar,
insulin is secreted,
**[14:14] man**
which causes a decrease in the
glucose needed for brain functions,
**[14:18] man**
which makes you sleepy.
**[14:24] gara**
Hey, you guys! Get out here, squawk!
**[14:28] dogo**
I think that chicken
carcass is calling us out.
**[14:31] dogo**
What should we do?
**[14:32] dogo**
Just ignore him.
**[14:34] dogo**
Thought so.
**[14:34] mon**
You people...
**[14:36] mon**
If you won't acknowledge my suffering...
**[14:40] mon**
I'll have to do this, squawk!
**[14:46] kiri**
What is he doing?
**[14:47] man**
Trying to stir up the wind
with his wings, I think...
**[14:51] man**
Too bad he's a chicken carcass.
**[14:52] dogo**
I feel a little bad for him.
**[14:55] dogo**
What should we do?
**[14:56] dogo**
Can't we just leave him be?
**[14:59] karl**
He's in the depths of anger and suffering!
**[15:03] karl**
We need to make him happy!
**[15:07] dogo**
Great, now Karls is here...
**[15:10] dogo**
I bet he's gonna make us do it again.
**[15:12] karl**
That's right!
**[15:25] karl**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[16:01] karl**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[16:15] karl**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[16:28] karl**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[16:41] karl**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[16:54] karl**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[16:59] karl**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[17:02] karl**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[17:04] karl**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[17:07] karl**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[17:09] karl**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[17:12] karl**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[17:16] karl**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[17:21] mon**
Hey!
**[17:22] mon**
Everything I eat just
gets boiled off as broth!
**[17:26] mon**
Because of that, I can't put on any weight!
**[17:30] mon**
I'm going to share that pain with you!
**[17:34] mon**
Chicken Carcass Broth Beam!
**[17:46] dogo**
Wow, this broth is delicious.
**[17:49] dogo**
Let me try.
**[17:51] dogo**
Yeah, what delicious broth!
**[17:53] mon**
Stop mocking me!
**[17:56] mon**
It's time to get serious!
**[17:58] mon**
Chicken Carcass Paitan Splash!
**[18:02] shu**
Soup made from chicken carcass
is very nutritious, isn't it?
**[18:06] mon**
Yes, squawk!
**[18:08] mon**
That's why people guzzle
down my broth, squawk!
**[18:11] mon**
It's also very delicious, squawk!
**[18:13] shu**
Why not be proud, then?
**[18:15] shu**
That's a sign that you're healthy.
**[18:18] mon**
W-Well...
**[18:20] shu**
In this world, there are people who
stress because they can't gain weight,
**[18:23] shu**
and people who stress
because they can't lose it.
**[18:27] shu**
Well, everyone stresses over a lot of things.
**[18:31] mon**
Th-They do?
**[18:32] shu**
Well, as long as you're healthy and can
enjoy a nice nap, you're all right in my book.
**[18:40] karl**
Now, everyone!
**[18:41] kiri**
Come on, Kyotaro. Hurry up.
**[18:46] kyo**
Let's get this over with.
**[18:49] kyo**
Use your powers combined to make him happy!
**[18:52] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:53] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:54] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:55] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:56] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:57] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:57] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[18:58] kyo**
Yes!
**[18:59] kyo**
Are you happy?
**[19:00] kyo**
Yes!
**[19:01] kyo**
Let's happy hour!
**[19:04] kyo**
Happy and Set!
**[19:18] kyo**
Return to happiness!
**[19:20] kyo**
Happy and Turn!
**[19:30] mon**
Squawk in the park...
**[19:38] mon**
Happy End!
**[19:40] mon**
Happy Powder!
**[19:46] suji**
What? What was I doing just now?
**[19:50] man**
That's the first year,
Sujikawa Honeo, isn't it?
**[19:52] dogo**
Yeah, he's so skinny people
call him chicken carcass...
**[19:57] suji**
Y-Yes.
**[19:58] suji**
But I always ace my physicals.
**[20:01] suji**
I'm the peak of health.
**[20:04] suji**
And even though I'm thin, I'm quite strong.
**[20:12] suji**
S-See?
**[20:14] dogo**
Hey, don't push yourself, too!
**[20:17] suji**
Excuse me.
**[20:21] karl**
Looks like everyone's happy again today!
**[20:24] karl**
Happy, happy!
**[20:28] una**
Now, now.
**[20:29] una**
There'll be other chances.
**[20:35] una**
That's right, Maasa. We haven't
tried your Maasa cookies yet.
**[20:42] una**
You won't give us any?
**[20:43] masa**
Well... I'm sorry about that.
**[20:49] masa**
The truth is... I was hiding something.
**[20:54] ata**
We'll catch it next time, then.
**[20:56] ata**
The Maasa "Fatten Up, You Pigs" Festival.
**[21:00] una**
Next time, I hope you'll put
in even more weight-gain butter
**[21:03] una**
to make everyone even fatter.
**[21:08] una**
And you'll still be you, Maasa.
**[21:12] una**
That's right. Let's go, Maasa.
**[21:21] shu**
I'm exhausted.
**[21:23] shu**
Just beat.
**[21:23] kiri**
Isn't this the second time
we've been here today?
**[21:26] man**
We really worked up a sweat
against that monster.
**[21:29] dogo**
It's best to have a bath after a fight!
**[21:32] waku**
But what was his secret in the end?
**[21:38] dogo**
Whose secret?
**[21:39] waku**
Shirahone Maasa.
**[21:40] waku**
He's your cousin, isn't he?
**[21:42] dogo**
Yeah, he is!
**[21:44] dogo**
But I couldn't think of what
secret he could possibly have,
**[21:48] dogo**
so I brought this...
**[21:49] waku**
Your elementary school album?
**[21:53] dogo**
Here!
**[21:56] kiri**
He looks totally different!
**[21:57] kiri**
Almost unrecognizable...
**[22:01] man**
And his name...
**[22:03] man**
Magozaemon?
**[22:11] masa**
Bye-bye, Magozaemon!
**[22:18] masa**
I'm Shirahone Maasa!
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** HAPPY Identity
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Identity"!
***SIGN*** All of a sudden, it's the rainy season! Good thing we don't have anything that can get moldy this year, huh?
***SIGN*** Some actually theorize that the word for "rainy season" originally meant "moldy season." (-Manza)
***SIGN***
# 6 - HAPPY Identity
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:12] shu**
Ah, the rainy season...
**[00:15] shu**
So exhausting.
**[00:19] karl**
What's all this?
**[00:20] karl**
Does "rainy season" mean it
really rains all the time?
**[00:22] karl**
This is the coolest!
**[00:24] karl**
Exhausting and heavy.
**[00:25] karl**
If something has to weigh me down,
I wish it could be just the rain *or* Karls...
**[00:30] karl**
What's the matter?
**[00:31] karl**
Humans don't like the rainy season?
**[00:33] karl**
Oh, is it because you can't dry
off quickly when you're wet?
**[00:36] karl**
I can handle that, though!
**[00:43] shu**
Actually, maybe I can't handle either option...
**[00:48] kar**
Hey, hey!
**[00:49] kar**
Is it really just gonna
keep raining like this?
**[00:52] kar**
Is there a sign or something when it stops?
**[00:55] kar**
I wanna see it!
**[00:57] shu**
If you spend enough time outdoors,
you'll probably see it.
**[01:00] kar**
Sounds great! I'll spend
all my time outdoors!
**[01:05] shu**
Looks like I'll just have to
worry about the rain, then.
**[01:15] ata**
What are you looking at?
**[01:17] ata**
You forgot your umbrella, didn't you?
**[01:20] ata**
You can't use mine.
**[01:21] shu**
No, I was thinking... it's really flashy.
**[01:25] ata**
What?!
**[01:27] ata**
That vinyl umbrella would
be better suited to you.
**[01:30] ata**
That vinyl umbrella, used as a stopgap
by those with poor planning skills!
**[01:35] shu**
Well... I have an umbrella, actually.
**[01:38] ata**
What?
**[01:39] kiri**
Sorry, did I keep you waiting long?
**[01:43] kiri**
Hey, Ata-kun!
**[01:45] kiri**
What's the matter?
**[01:47] ata**
You always do this!
**[01:49] ata**
You make no preparations,
force others to help you,
**[01:52] ata**
then take it for granted that they will!
**[01:54] kiri**
What's going on?
**[01:56] ata**
And Kirishima! You're just as bad!
**[01:58] ata**
You constantly indulge him!
**[02:01] una**
What's all this?
**[02:05] una**
Well, goodbye.
**[02:10] shu**
So sleepy.
***SIGN*** HAPPY Identity
**[03:57] kiri**
Hey, Kyotaro. Why *don't* you carry an umbrella?
**[04:02] shu**
Can't be bothered.
**[04:11] shu**
The rainy season has me
even sleepier than usual.
**[04:14] kiri**
You're sleepy all year round, Kyotaro.
**[04:17] waku**
Now that you mention it, I can't imagine
Kyotaro-kun carrying an umbrella.
**[04:21] dogo**
That's true...
**[04:23] dogo**
Nanao-senpai, I always imagine
you with a bamboo umbrella.
**[04:30] dogo**
It would look perfect with you!
**[04:32] man**
And you...
**[04:36] man**
You carry that perpetually
busted-up vinyl one.
**[04:39] dogo**
Shut up! You're no better!
**[04:43] dogo**
You always carry that same purple vinyl one!
**[04:47] man**
P-Purple merges the contrasting vitality
of red with the tranquility of blue.
**[04:53] man**
Psychologically speaking,
it represents balance!
**[05:00] man**
S-Speaking of umbrellas,
130 million of them are sold per year.
**[05:04] man**
80 million of those are vinyl umbrellas.
**[05:07] man**
In addition, over half of those
end up busted within the year...
**[05:09] shu**
Oh, I hear people lose vinyl umbrellas a lot.
**[05:13] kiri**
Kyotaro, you're the only person in Japan who
could treat a universal experience like hearsay.
**[05:16] man**
Hey, are you listening?
**[05:17] dogo**
They're stolen a lot, too!
**[05:19] waku**
Because vinyl umbrellas
are so indistinguishable.
**[05:22] waku**
It's hard to notice if
someone swaps them on you.
**[05:24] waku**
The best way to prevent theft might
be to add a distinguishing mark of some kind.
**[05:30] dogo**
Like writing your name really big...
***SIGN*** Dogo Ichiro
**[05:33] man**
Assuming that wouldn't embarrass you, anyway.
**[05:36] waku**
Actually, I think asserting
yourself like that
**[05:39] waku**
would be the best way to guard against theft.
**[05:41] waku**
Who would steal something they'd
be embarrassed to carry around?
**[05:49] tori**
Those people... They seem like
they're just shooting the breeze.
**[05:54] tori**
Maybe I'll try talking to them...
**[05:58] tori**
No, I can't.
**[05:59] tori**
I'll just get swept along
in the conversation.
**[06:04] tori**
I...
**[06:06] tori**
I can't make real friends.
**[06:09] tori**
The kinds of friends I really want are...
**[06:20] shu**
*You've got a hell of a backbone.*
**[06:23] tori**
*So do you.*
***SIGN*** Friendship
**[06:32] tori**
...friends that you make like this!
**[06:35] tori**
Friends you have heated debates with!
**[06:38] tori**
That you sweat with!
**[06:40] tori**
But I...
**[06:42] tori**
Shucho Kaimu...
***SIGN*** Shucho Kaimu
**[06:44] tori**
As my name suggests,
I'm unable to assert myself...
**[06:47] tori**
I'm just swept along with
whatever everyone else is doing.
**[06:51] tori**
I don't have any real friends.
**[06:54] tori**
Bye-bye!
**[06:55] tori**
Bye-bye!
**[06:55] tori**
Bye-bye!
**[06:56] tori**
Bye-bye!
**[07:00] tori**
Just "bye-bye" friends, who wave to
each other when it's time to go home.
**[07:05] tori**
It's barely two seconds of communication!
**[07:08] tori**
We've only just met
and we're already saying goodbye!
**[07:11] tori**
Those aren't friends!
**[07:13] tori**
Have I... Have I...
**[07:17] tori**
Have I not made real friends yet?
**[07:20] tori**
Have I not experienced
true high school life yet?
**[07:24] kiri**
He's been there for a while, hasn't he?
**[07:26] kiri**
Yes, he has.
**[07:28] kiri**
Definitely.
**[07:29] kiri**
A peeping Tom?
**[07:34] tori**
Now's the moment! Now!
**[07:36] tori**
I need to break out of
my shell, assert myself,
**[07:38] tori**
and make proper, deep friendships!
**[07:43] tori**
Now that I think about it,
a strong icebreaker is important, isn't it?
**[07:47] tori**
Maybe I'll lead with a simple,
"The bath feels great, huh?"
**[07:51] tori**
Or something like that?
**[07:53] tori**
No, something so trivial won't do!
**[07:57] tori**
I need to grab their attention
the moment I enter!
**[08:00] tori**
But if I get too personal,
they might think I'm weird...
**[08:04] tori**
Maybe I'll just slip into their ongoing
conversation, and earn goodwill that way?
**[08:08] kiri**
Is he looking at us and muttering to himself?
**[08:11] waku**
Ryoma-kun, go check him out.
**[08:14] kiri**
Sure!
**[08:14] kiri**
Wait, why me?
**[08:16] dogo**
If he's peeping, we should confront him!
**[08:18] man**
No, we can't do that, either.
**[08:22] shu**
I'm overheating.
**[08:25] kiri**
W-Wait, Kyotaro!
**[08:36] tori**
What luck!
**[08:38] tori**
Opportunity has fallen into my lap!
**[08:39] tori**
Okay, now, just how you practiced it...
**[08:42] tori**
Brown's the best color for umbrellas,
don't you think?
**[08:45] tori**
You know... umber-ellas.
**[08:48] kiri**
Is he trying to justify peeping?
**[08:49] kiri**
Can puns do that?
**[08:51] kiri**
Building off our talk of umbrellas?
**[08:53] kiri**
Expanding our umbrella circle has
called a dangerous man into our midst.
**[08:56] shu**
I don't know. Why?
**[08:59] kiri**
Wow, he gave a prompt
after getting the punchline...
**[09:02] kiri**
He's forcing him to make a riddle out of it?
**[09:04] kiri**
Kyotaro-kun's got a real sadistic streak.
**[09:07] tori**
Um, w-well, it's a joke on the color umber,
**[09:10] tori**
like brown, and the word umbrella...
**[09:12] man**
The more he explains it,
the more painful this gets.
**[09:15] dogo**
Oh, hey! Was that the joke?
**[09:17] man**
You actually needed the explanation?!
**[09:20] tori**
Um... um...
**[09:23] tori**
I... I like vinyl umbrellas, because they're
transparent, which lets you see your surroundings better.
**[09:28] tori**
They're cheap, and they're stolen often...
**[09:30] shu**
I don't know. Wh—
**[09:32] kiri**
No reason!
**[09:33] kiri**
I think we've been in
the bath too long today.
**[09:37] tori**
Um, um... Vinyl umbrellas
are very easy to use...
**[09:41] tori**
Right? R-Right?
**[09:43] man**
Let's hurry! There are some
things you just shouldn't touch.
**[09:47] dog**
Touch?! He's a groper, too?
**[09:51] waku**
Ichiro-kun, I'll buy you a
basic guide to idioms later.
**[09:56] waku**
Let's go.
**[09:57] dogo**
Really? Really?
**[09:59] dogo**
I'd be honored to get a present
from you, Nanao-senpai!
**[10:02] tori**
Um, wait a mi—
**[10:08] tori**
How could this have happened?
**[10:09] tori**
I tried to initiate a real conversation,
yet I completely failed to assert myself...
**[10:14] tori**
I wanted to have a deeper
conversation and be real friends!
**[10:29] shiro**
Using a vinyl umbrella made
for the British royal family
**[10:33] shiro**
makes even walking to
school in the rainy season
**[10:34] shiro**
feel like a precious
morning, don't you think?
**[10:37] una**
If you used a normal vinyl umbrella,
you'd look just like everyone else.
**[10:41] ata**
Wielding a high-class umbrella
suggests self-awareness and responsibility.
**[10:47] ata**
The student council must not
carry the umbrellas of commoners.
**[10:52] una**
Ah.
**[10:53] hone**
I... see.
**[10:57] tori**
*Vinyl umbrellas...*
**[10:58] tori**
* I bet even an umbrella like this*
* could be an opening for a conversation.*
**[11:07] tori**
* I didn't assert myself enough last*
* time about the vinyl umbrellas.*
**[11:11] tori**
*If I assert my love for vinyl umbrellas more,*
**[11:14] tori**
*I'm sure we'll become good friends!*
**[11:16] dogo**
Boy, I'm hungry!
**[11:19] dogo**
Let's eat!
**[11:21] tori**
Wow, don't vinyl umbrellas look delicious?
**[11:25] dogo**
I'm done!
**[11:29] man**
It's that guy from before!
**[11:31] dogo**
That guy is bad news!
**[11:35] man**
What on earth is his problem?
**[11:37] dogo**
Did we do something to make him hate us?
**[11:42] shu**
Just exhausted.
**[11:43] shu**
The rainy season's possessed me.
**[11:45] shu**
Ryo-chin, exorcise it.
**[11:48] kiri**
Possessed you? It's not a demon...
**[11:53] tori**
Would you like a vinyl umbrella?
**[11:56] shu**
I don't know. Why?
**[12:01] kiri**
Th-That's right!
**[12:02] kiri**
We were gonna take the long way around,
to get some exercise in!
**[12:06] kiri**
Scary!
**[12:07] kiri**
Maybe he's not a creeper,
but a kind of demon?
**[12:16] tori**
The view from under a vinyl umbrella...
**[12:19] tori**
The rain makes everything blurry,
which is a bit melancholy, don't you think?
**[12:23] tori**
But I like that about it!
**[12:25] tori**
Would you like one?
**[12:34] kiri**
What do you think?
**[12:35] dogo**
He's definitely bad news!
**[12:38] man**
And if you look into his eyes...
**[12:42] man**
They're the eyes of a man
who's crossed a line.
**[12:45] kiri**
No... It suggests...
**[12:47] kiri**
he may not be human at all anymore.
**[12:50] waku**
But he did seem quite obsessed
with vinyl umbrellas.
**[12:56] shu**
You think he works for a
company that makes them?
**[12:59] shu**
It is the rainy season...
**[13:00] shu**
The rainy season, yeah.
**[13:02] shu**
It's... the rainy season, yeah.
**[13:04] shu**
Maybe it's viral marketing
for vinyl umbrellas?
**[13:07] shu**
Maybe!
**[13:08] kiri**
Very... passionate... viral marketing.
**[13:12] waku**
We're definitely backing
away from the truth...
**[13:16] waku**
But I like that about us.
**[13:25] tori**
My chance! This time...
**[13:27] kiri**
Sorry about that.
**[13:28] tori**
Hey...
**[13:31] kiri**
There he is!
**[13:33] kiri**
Look, we already have a vinyl umbrella.
**[13:36] kiri**
Come on, let's go, Kyotaro.
**[13:43] karl**
Karu-ru-ru-ru!
**[13:44] karl**
Rain, rain! Yeah, yeah!
**[13:48] tori**
I'm just like these vinyl umbrellas.
**[13:52] tori**
Neither of us have any self-assertion.
**[13:57] tori**
That's why nobody cares about us.
**[14:00] (Flashback) tori**
Bye-bye!
**[14:01] (Flashback) tori**
Bye-bye!
**[14:02] (Flashback) tori**
Bye-bye!
**[14:02] (Flashback) tori**
Bye-bye!
**[14:06] tori**
For two years... we've never said anything
but "hello" and "goodbye" to each other!
**[14:12] tori**
Everyone's just fine without me!
**[14:15] tori**
Vinyl umbrellas are all the same,
too, and that's why they get stolen!
**[14:18] tori**
And when that happens,
people just say "fine, whatever!"
**[14:22] ata**
That's right.
**[14:27] tori**
Aren't you...
**[14:30] tori**
the student council?
***SIGN*** Ibusuki Ata Born June 12th Blood Type A Gemini Hobbies: Spending time at home Likes: Nagashi-somen, hard work
**[14:46] karl**
Someone's unhappy.
**[14:47] shu**
Here we go again.
**[14:49] karl**
My knights of happiness!
**[14:51] karl**
Come on!
**[15:02] karl**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[15:39] karl**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[15:52] karl**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[16:05] karl**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[16:19] karl**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[16:32] karl**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[16:37] karl**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[16:39] karl**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[16:42] karl**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[16:44] karl**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[16:46] karl**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[16:49] karl**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[16:53] karl**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[16:57] karl**
Knights contract complete!
**[17:00] shu**
Oh, we transformed again.
**[17:04] karl**
Right now, he's in the depths of
the suffering known as resentment!
**[17:08] karl**
We need to make him happy!
**[17:12] bini**
Viny viny viny!
**[17:19] ---**
That's dangerous!
**[17:20] kiri**
What's with all the droplets?
**[17:24] kiri**
Wait, is that all he's got?
**[17:26] kiri**
I think it's just normal water.
**[17:28] dogo**
Oh, please.
**[17:29] dogo**
This guy's nothing special.
**[17:31] dogo**
Viny?
**[17:32] bini**
How dare you mock me!
**[17:35] bini**
Viny!
**[17:39] dogo**
This attack's a lot more dangerous!
**[17:43] bini**
Don't underestimate the potential of vinyl!
**[17:46] bini**
You guys say vinyl umbrellas are mass-produced
with no distinguishing features!
**[17:50] bini**
You should take better care of them!
**[17:56] waku**
Do you think this monster might be the boy
who was obsessed with vinyl umbrellas?
**[18:03] shira**
Maybe we should leave it to that
monster and head back for now?
**[18:07] una**
Sounds good to me.
**[18:10] una**
Ata?
**[18:11] una**
What's the matter?
**[18:17] una**
Maybe we'll watch a little longer.
**[18:20] vin**
Viny viny!
**[18:21] vin**
You just realized it now?
**[18:23] vin**
That's right! That's what I am!
**[18:26] vin**
I'm like an indistinguishable vinyl umbrella,
that you don't even notice when it's stolen!
**[18:30] vin**
None of you would talk to me!
**[18:33] kiri**
I think he's blaming this on us.
**[18:36] dogo**
Taishi, you're the one who
said he'd crossed the line!
**[18:39] man**
I-Ichiro, you're the one who left your
seat without taking a bite of your curry!
**[18:43] waku**
Now, now.
**[18:44] waku**
Why don't we settle this in the usual way,
by making him happy?
**[18:47] man**
Fair enough.
**[18:48] dogo**
I guess...
**[18:49] kiri**
Oh? Where's Kyotaro gone?
**[18:55] kiri**
There he is!
**[18:58] kiri**
Oh, there he is.
**[19:00] kiri**
Hey!
**[19:03] kiri**
I think he's sleeping.
**[19:06] kiri**
Ryoma-kun, could you fetch him?
**[19:08] kiri**
For heaven's sake. This is pitiful...
**[19:12] dogo**
Um... I think he's waiting for us...
**[19:16] dogo**
You think he's a good guy?
**[19:17] dogo**
Maybe he's just the kind of
person who's easily swept along?
**[19:20] kiri**
Kyotaro.
**[19:22] kiri**
Hey! Wake up!
**[19:26] shu**
It's just so hard to care when it's raining.
**[19:28] shu**
Ryo-chin. Could you please fill in for me?
**[19:31] krii**
What do you think this is? Homework?
**[19:34] vini**
Viny! Viny! Viny!
**[19:36] vini**
How long are you gonna make me wait?!
**[19:38] man**
He really was waiting?
**[19:40] man**
I think he might really be a good guy!
**[19:43] man**
Shut up! Shut up!
**[19:44] man**
Stop mocking me all the time!
**[19:46] waku**
That was a smooth piece
of baiting, right there.
**[19:49] vini**
Don't mock vinyl umbrellas!
**[19:51] shu**
Vinyl umbrellas are very
convenient and easy to use.
**[19:56] shu**
They fulfill their job
as umbrellas very well.
**[19:59] vin**
Viny?
**[20:00] shu**
You can mark them so that
they won't be stolen
**[20:03] shu**
and assert your personality that way, too.
**[20:05] vin**
Viny!
**[20:07] vin**
I tried to mark myself, too!
**[20:10] vin**
But you still wouldn't talk to me!
**[20:12] dogo**
Marked?
**[20:13] man**
He probably means that string
of misguided approaches.
**[20:16] both**
We never noticed!
**[20:18] viny**
I just want to assert myself with others
without getting swept along.
**[20:27] viny**
Why not join the debate club, then?
**[20:30] viny**
Now! Use your powers
combined to make him happy!
**[20:34] viny**
Are you happy?
**[20:35] viny**
Yes!
**[20:35] viny**
Are you happy?
**[20:36] viny**
Yes!
**[20:37] viny**
Are you happy?
**[20:38] viny**
Yes!
**[20:38] viny**
Are you happy?
**[20:39] viny**
Yes!
**[20:40] viny**
Are you happy?
**[20:41] viny**
Yes!
**[20:42] viny**
Let's happy hour!
**[20:45] viny**
Happy and Set!
**[20:58] viny**
Return to happiness!
**[21:00] viny**
Happy and Turn!
**[21:12] viny**
Right as rain.
**[21:13] viny**
Because I'm an umbrella, you know?
**[21:19] viny**
Happy End!
**[21:21] viny**
Happy Powder!
**[21:29] tori**
You've opened my eyes!
**[21:31] tori**
I'll assert myself in the debate club!
**[21:38] ata**
I guess he was just a
vinyl umbrella all along.
**[21:40] ata**
He wasn't worthy to take the spotlight.
**[21:45] una**
Ata?
**[21:46] una**
Darn it...
**[21:52] dogo**
My umbrella!
**[21:55] waku**
I guess there's no need to worry
about it being stolen now.
**[21:58] waku**
It suits you surprisingly well.
**[22:00] waku**
Very self-assertive.
**[22:02] waku**
Chiro, you might not need that.
**[22:08] waku**
The rain let up.
**[22:09] waku**
A rainbow, huh?
**[22:10] waku**
A rainbow, yeah.
**[22:11] waku**
Total rainbow.
**[22:12] waku**
A rainbow? Where, where?
**[22:14] waku**
Wow!
**[22:16] karl**
Yahoo!
**[22:18] karl**
It's the sign for when the rain stops!
**[22:19] karl**
Karurururu!
***SIGN*** HAPPY Flutter Kicks
***SIGN*** Next Episode
**[23:54] sign**
Next time: ''Let's happy kiss our
way to HAPPY Flutter Kicks."
***SIGN*** Suddenly, it's summer! Another all-male swimming competition?
***SIGN*** It's a school event, so there will be the traditional principal's long-winded speech.
***SIGN*** Actually, this comment is so long-winded we had to shrink the font, so it's really hard to read, sorry about that.
***SIGN***
# 7 - Let's happy kiss our way to HAPPY Flutter Kicks
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** HAPPY Flutter Kicks
***SIGN*** Binan High School All Men Swimming Competition
**[01:40] man**
The Binan High School All
Men Swimming Competition.
**[01:44] man**
It's a traditional event with over 100 years
of history, held in our school pool.
**[01:50] shu**
Such a pain in the neck...
**[01:55] dogo**
I bought a new swimsuit, too!
**[01:57] waku**
Oh?
**[01:57] waku**
Don't first years need to wear
their school swimsuit?
**[02:00] dogo**
Do we?!
**[02:03] man**
You should have gotten a handout about it.
**[02:05] dogo**
Aw, but why only the first years?
**[02:08] man**
That's a 100-year tradition, too.
**[02:11] dogo**
It's not fair! You guys have all the fun!
**[02:14] kiri**
Kyotaro, have you bought a swimsuit yet?
**[02:16] shu**
Not yet. I think I'll just use my
swimsuit from last year, actually.
**[02:20] kiri**
What? You're gonna wear that
navy blue school swimsuit again?
***SIGN*** Shuzenji Kyotaro
**[02:24] kiri**
It's even got a name tag that says
"Class 1-B, Shuzenji Kyotaro" on it.
**[02:30] shu**
I just don't care about swimsuits, though...
**[02:31] dogo**
But, Senpai, if you have
the freedom to choose...
**[02:35] man**
Actually, having the freedom to choose your
swimsuit comes with a lot of pressure, too.
**[02:40] man**
It puts a person's taste on trial.
**[02:43] waku**
Of course, the more unremarkable
a person is on the inside,
**[02:46] waku**
the more desperate they are
to have a remarkable look.
**[02:49] dogo**
Yeah! I really want that remarkable look!
**[02:52] man**
That's what he was mocking...
**[02:54] waku**
I think the swimsuit competition will
coincide with the Pretty Boy Contest, too.
***SIGN*** Simultaneous event!
The Pretty Boy Contest will be held, too!
**[03:00] dogo**
You're right!
**[03:02] man**
I heard the rule this time is that whoever
stands out most at the swimming contest wins.
**[03:08] dogo**
All the more reason I want a new swimsuit!
**[03:11] karl**
Maybe I'll wear one instead!
**[03:13] dogo**
Otters don't need clothes!
**[03:16] shu**
I'm totally incapable of caring.
**[03:18] shu**
I'm going to go home and sleep.
**[03:20] kiri**
Hey, wait, Kyotaro!
**[03:22] kiri**
What should I wear for my swimsuit?
**[03:24] kiri**
Hey! Hey!
***SIGN*** 125th Binan High School All Men Swimming Competition Binan High School Outdoor Pool Starts 10:00
**[03:27] una**
It's finally come.
**[03:29] una**
Yes.
**[03:30] shira**
I ordered a special swimsuit for myself.
**[03:33] shira**
It wouldn't be very "Maasa" to wear the same
navy blue thing as the other first years!
**[03:38] fura**
I see. This will be a fine chance.
**[03:41] ata**
In what way?
**[03:43] fura**
It's time for us to show our prowess.
**[03:46] fura**
We'll use the swimming competition to prove
that we are the leading men of this world.
**[03:51] shira**
No need for that!
**[03:53] shira**
Maasa is always the world's
leading cutiepie!
***SIGN*** Simultaneous event!
The Pretty Boy Contest will be held, too!
**[03:57] fura**
Pretty Boy Contest?
**[03:59] fura**
This is it!
**[04:01] fura**
We'll win, and prove that
the Furanui Knights are...
**[04:05] fura**
...superior!
**[04:10] fura**
Damn them...
**[04:12] una**
For heaven's sake.
**[04:14] una**
Winning the Pretty Boy
Contest is so beneath us.
**[04:19] shira**
For reals.
**[04:20] ata**
Yes. Our goal at the swimming contest is—
**[04:24] kiri**
Hey, Ata-kun.
**[04:29] kiri**
Um... I...
**[04:32] kiri**
As the student council, you should go first.
**[04:35] shira**
Thank you!
**[04:36] una**
C'mon, Ata. They're yielding the way.
**[04:38] shira**
Let's go, Senpai.
**[04:40] ata**
Right...
**[04:44] shu**
What were we talking about again?
**[04:48] kiri**
Swimsuits! I gotta figure out what to buy!
**[04:49] ata**
*Shuzenji Kyotaro.*
**[04:51] ata**
* I'll prepare a special surprise for*
* you at the swimming competition.*
**[04:57] nat**
*This season's come again.*
**[05:01] nat**
*I hate swimming class so much...*
**[05:04] nat**
*because I can't swim!*
**[05:07] nat**
*It's always been that way...*
**[05:08] nat**
* I've always been mocked for*
* not knowing how to swim.*
**[05:11] nat**
*In kindergarten...*
**[05:12] nat**
*In elementary school...*
**[05:14] nat**
*In middle school...*
**[05:16] nat**
* Always resigned to the corner,*
* swimming with a kickboard.*
**[05:20] sign**
*Even though my name means
"Fulfilling Summer"...*
***SIGN*** Natsukawa Jujitsu
**[05:25] sign**
*But summer... Pools...
The swimming contest...*
**[05:29] sign**
I wish they'd all go away!
**[05:35] tawara**
For over a century since our founding,
**[05:39] tawara**
the All Men Swimming Competition
has been a tradition at our school.
**[05:44] tawara**
In that time, thousands... No, tens of thousands
of students have cast off their uniforms
**[05:47] kiri**
I'm glad I went with the safe choice.
**[05:50] tawara**
to bare their flesh and compete,
bare their flesh and make friends,
**[05:51] shu**
Why is the principal's speech so long?
**[05:53] tawara**
bare their flesh and exercise,
bare their flesh and argue...
**[05:55] kiri**
Kyotaro, I think you're cheating.
**[05:58] shu**
If I nap without a jacket, I'll get cold.
**[06:01] dogo**
Taishi, let's give it our all!
***SIGN*** Manza Taishi
**[06:05] man**
This really is humiliating...
**[06:08] waku**
There's quite a few of them this year, too.
**[06:11] waku**
Everyone's trying to hard
to assert their uniqueness...
**[06:18] tawa**
Now, everyone!
**[06:19] tawa**
This year, as fellow disrobed
men dripping with charm,
**[06:23] tawa**
let's all fight our hardest!
**[06:29] waku**
He's a bit worked up too, I see.
**[06:31] tawara**
And don't forget that the Binan High
School All Men Swimming Competition
**[06:36] tawara**
includes the Pretty Boy Contest, too!
**[06:38] tawara**
Now, let's get started!
**[06:44] shu**
Time for a nap.
**[06:47] ata**
*Shuzenji Kyotaro.*
**[06:49] ata**
*Your time will soon come.*
**[06:51] ata**
* Today, you'll be the laughingstock*
* of the spectators.*
**[07:00] karl**
Feeling good and happy!
**[07:04] fura**
The fool!
**[07:05] tawa**
First, on a floating platform,
**[07:07] tawa**
we'll hold the inter-grade king-of-the-mountain
event, "Butt Out! Rear-End Wrestling".
**[07:13] dogo**
Nanao-senpai!
**[07:14] dogo**
Let's throw out "senpai" and "kouhai"
titles and have a fair fight!
**[07:18] waku**
Well, aren't you earnest?
**[07:20] tawa**
Get ready... Get set...
**[07:24] tawa**
Wakura!
**[07:27] wa**
Sorry about that, Ichiro-kun.
**[07:30] tawa**
Next up, "The Wacky Horseback
Obstacle Course"!
**[07:34] man**
For heaven's sake.
Why do I have to be the horse?
**[07:37] shira**
You know Maasa can't be the horse!
**[07:39] shira**
Good thing I beat you at rock-paper-scissors.
**[07:41] una**
Maasa! Do your best!
**[07:45] masa**
Of course.
**[07:47] tawa**
Ready, go!
**[07:50] shira**
What are you doing?
They're getting away from us!
**[07:55] man**
Enough of this nonsense...
**[07:56] man**
Let the man's spirit be reborn!
**[08:00] dogo**
Nice one, Taishi!
**[08:02] all**
Manza! Manza! Manza!
**[08:05] man**
If you're going to compete,
it's always best to win, after all.
**[08:09] shira**
I can't take it...
**[08:17] fura**
The Defense Club is winning this thing!
**[08:22] tawara**
"If You Fall, You Fail! Log Rodeo!"
**[08:26] una**
Well, looks like I'm up.
**[08:29] shira**
Senpai! Fight!
**[08:31] tawara**
Ready, go!
**[08:38] kiri**
Unazuki-senpai is amazing!
**[08:44] una**
That was easy.
**[08:48] fura**
So they have it in them after all.
**[08:51] waku**
It's fun to watch them all so excited.
**[08:55] tawa**
Okay, everyone!
**[08:56] tawa**
It's break time!
**[08:59] tawa**
The swim club and the wrestling club
will hold a joint water acrobatics show!
***SIGN*** I call it, "A Brawn Flower Blooms in Binan"!
***SIGN*** Take it away!
**[09:17] ata**
*Where did Shuzenji Kyotaro go?*
**[09:20] ata**
* I was going to put him in the loincloth relay*
* and give him the embarrassment of a lifetime.*
**[09:27] kiri**
There you are!
**[09:30] kiri**
Ata-kun, we were supposed to be in
the chicken fight together, right?
**[09:33] ata**
Yes. What about it?
**[09:35] kiri**
Suzuki-kun got sick
and can't participate.
**[09:39] ata**
What?
**[09:40] kiri**
But don't worry.
**[09:41] kiri**
I found a stand-in.
**[09:43] ata**
Oh? Who did you ask?
**[09:45] kiri**
Well, it's...
**[09:50] kiri**
Feels like old times, huh?
**[09:54] dogo**
What's with that combination?
**[09:56] man**
One of their teammates dropped out, I hear.
**[10:00] dogo**
I'm surprised Kyotaro-senpai
agreed to it, though...
**[10:03] man**
I'm sure Kirishima-senpai said,
**[10:05] man**
"You just have to ride on top.
I'm begging you!"
**[10:09] man**
...and forced him into it, basically.
**[10:13] waku**
Things are getting interesting here, too!
**[10:16] stu**
Look at that little otter!
**[10:18] stu**
Super cute!
**[10:20] karl**
Blissful and happy!
**[10:23] tawara**
Now, let's begin the inter-grade
All Men Chicken Fight!
**[10:27] tawara**
Start!
**[10:36] kiri**
They're coming right for us!
**[10:39] shu**
So sleepy...
**[10:40] ata**
Don't sleep! Take this seriously!
**[10:44] man**
Senpai dodged in his sleep!
**[10:47] man**
They're coming back!
**[10:48] man**
Come on! Wake up!
**[10:59] kiri**
We did it!
**[11:03] dogo**
Incredible! Kyotaro-senpai won!
**[11:06] man**
That's an unexpected result.
**[11:08] waku**
It really is.
**[11:11] all**
Shuzenji! Shuzenji! Shuzenji! Shuzenji!
**[11:13] stu**
Shuzenji-kun could win this
month's Pretty Boy Contest!
**[11:17] stu**
Yeah!
**[11:18] kiri**
You did it, Kyotaro!
**[11:21] shu**
What a nice nap.
**[11:30] fura**
Sniff, sniff.
**[11:31] fura**
I smell unhappiness at
the best possible time.
**[11:38] natsu**
With the chicken fight over,
it's almost my turn.
**[11:42] natsu**
Maybe I can still call it off...
**[11:45] fura**
Why not ruin everything
for everyone, instead?
**[11:50] natsu**
Aren't you the student council?
**[11:53] una**
We understand your suffering.
**[11:55] una**
A competition where only
those who swim can shine...
**[11:58] una**
It's truly hell for those who can't.
**[12:01] ata**
It's time for you to show them
**[12:04] ata**
the suffering you feel, shuffled off to
a corner of the pool with your kickboard.
**[12:11] shira**
And then you can put an end
to the swimming competition!
**[12:22] shira**
Die Verwandlung!
**[12:25] shira**
That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
**[12:28] shira**
Ritter Diamant!
**[12:31] shira**
Affection and comfort...
**[12:33] shira**
Ritter Rosenquarz!
**[12:36] shira**
Noble and virtuous!
**[12:38] shira**
Ritter Amethyst!
**[12:42] shira**
We are the Furanui Knights...
**[12:44] shira**
Edelstein!
**[12:47] shira**
Druck!
**[12:48] shira**
Mich!
**[12:48] shira**
Hart!
**[12:51] shira**
An!
***SIGN*** Unazuki Taiju Born December 22nd Blood Type: O, Capricorn Hobbies: Sampling ramen Likes: Koshihikari rice, observing
**[13:06] tawa**
Time for our next event:
Kickboard Relay, Go!
**[13:10] stu**
Huh? Where's Natsukawa?
**[13:12] stu**
He's entered in this event.
Where could he have gone?
**[13:18] mon**
I'm right here!
**[13:21] stu**
What's that?
**[13:22] stu**
A kickboard?
**[13:24] mon**
Kickboard Monster has appeared!
**[13:28] karl**
Blissful and happy!
**[13:31] karl**
What's that?
**[13:33] mon**
You people!
**[13:35] mon**
The swimming competition is a normie event!
**[13:37] mon**
It's only for people who can swim
**[13:41] mon**
and narcissists who like
to show off their bodies!
**[13:44] kiri**
Hey, Kyotaro! Wake up!
**[13:45] mon**
I, Kickboard Monster, will crush
this swimming competition!
**[13:46] kiri**
Something weird is happening!
**[13:50] shu**
Can I go home now?1
**[13:52] karl**
You may not!
**[13:54] karl**
He's in the depths of anger and suffering!
**[13:58] karl**
We need to make him happy!
**[14:01] waku**
Another round of the usual, then?
**[14:06] karl**
As prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
**[14:09] karl**
Become Karl's Knights Happy Kiss
and save the people!
**[14:24] karl**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[15:01] karl**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[15:14] karl**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[15:28] karl**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[15:41] karl**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[15:53] karl**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[15:58] karl**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[16:01] karl**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[16:03] karl**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[16:06] karl**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[16:08] karl**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[16:11] karl**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[16:15] karl**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[16:19] karl**
Knights contract complete!
**[16:23] mon**
Who are you people?
**[16:24] mon**
With those outfits, you must
be more summer-loving normies!
**[16:28] mon**
I, Kickboard Monster, shall destroy you!
**[16:29] kiri**
That's one backwards kickboard.
**[16:32] dogo**
Backwards kickboard?
**[16:33] dogo**
So you wouldn't move forward
no matter how hard you kick!
**[16:37] man**
That's not how he meant it...
**[16:39] float**
What are you people jabbering about?
**[16:43] float**
Listen! Kickboards are the symbol
of people who can't swim!
**[16:47] float**
People leave me one by one
as they learn how to swim,
**[16:50] float**
and enjoy summer swimming all on their own!
**[16:54] float**
But I'm going to show you.
**[16:57] float**
There are poor people out there who have
to swim with a kickboard all their lives!
**[17:03] mon**
Kickboards!
**[17:05] kiri**
He's throwing kickboards!
**[17:11] mon**
How dare you dodge them!
**[17:13] mon**
Then it's time for...
**[17:14] mon**
Kickboard Kick!
**[17:20] dogo**
Kickboard kicks... That takes me back!
**[17:23] dogo**
We used to do that back in the swimming club!
**[17:25] dogo**
In the kids' program!
**[17:27] mon**
Kids' program?!
**[17:29] mon**
Are you telling me I'll
be a kid all my life?!
**[17:32] dogo**
That wasn't what I meant...
**[17:34] mon**
Now, Kickboard Flutter Kick!
**[17:38] waku**
I reached 18th rank in the 15
meter kickboard flutter kick.
**[17:44] mon**
18th rank?!
**[17:45] waku**
Well, I cleared it easily when I was three.
**[17:49] kiri**
How far did you go?
**[17:51] waku**
I quit at 1st rank.
**[17:52] waku**
I was probably around 2nd grade by then.
**[17:57] man**
He looks really mad about something...
**[18:00] mon**
How dare you mock kickboards!
**[18:04] mon**
It's time for...
**[18:05] mon**
Kickboard Screw!
**[18:11] dogo**
This is really bad!
**[18:13] kiri**
What should we do, Kyotaro?
**[18:15] kiri**
He's gone!
**[18:17] waku**
He's over there.
**[18:28] shira**
That's my oyster shell float!
**[18:33] mon**
You, there! How dare you relax in here?
**[18:36] shu**
But it's silly, isn't it?
**[18:38] ---**
What?!
**[18:39] shu**
Everyone has their own strengths
and weaknesses, right?
**[18:45] shu**
Some people are bad at the high bar.
**[18:47] shu**
Some are bad at jump-rope.
**[18:49] shu**
Some are bad at running.
**[18:51] shu**
Some are bad at academics,
at cooking, at athletics...
**[18:55] mon**
T-True...
**[18:57] shu**
So you just got the short end
of the stick on swimming, right?
**[19:01] mon**
That's true, but...
**[19:04] mon**
Because of that, summers are...
Summers are really hard on me...
**[19:08] shu**
There are lots of ways to enjoy
summer, even if you can't swim.
**[19:12] shu**
My favorite summer thing
**[19:14] shu**
is lazing around in front of a fan
after getting out of a hot bath.
**[19:21] karl**
Now, everyone! Go!
**[19:23] shu**
Come on, Kyotaro!
**[19:25] shu**
Get over here already!
**[19:28] shu**
This scallop shell seemed really
nice for napping, though...
**[19:32] shira**
It's not a scallop shell!
It's an oyster shell!
**[19:35] shira**
Now! Use your powers
combined to make him happy!
**[19:38] shira**
Are you happy?
**[19:39] shira**
Yes!
**[19:40] shira**
Are you happy?
**[19:41] shira**
Yes!
**[19:41] shira**
Are you happy?
**[19:43] shira**
Yes!
**[19:43] shira**
Are you happy?
**[19:44] shira**
Yes!
**[19:45] shira**
Are you happy?
**[19:46] shira**
Yes!
**[19:46] shira**
Let's happy hour!
**[19:50] shira**
Happy and Set!
**[20:03] shira**
Return to happiness!
**[20:05] shira**
Happy and Turn!
**[20:17] mon**
I'm floating without a kickboard right now...
**[20:24] shu**
Happy End!
**[20:26] shu**
Happy Powder!
**[20:36] natsu**
What? What was I...
**[20:40] stu**
Wow! Was that Natsukawa?
**[20:42] stu**
I've never gotten to watch
a hero show this close up!
**[20:45] stu**
That was really cool, Natsukawa!
**[20:45] stu**
Natsukawa! Natsukawa! Natsukawa! Natsukawa!
**[20:54] natsu**
They're calling my name...
**[20:58] natsu**
The kickboard became a hero!
***SIGN*** Kurotama Bath
**[21:06] shu**
I'm exhausted.
**[21:08] kiri**
But I'm happy for that
Natsukawa kid, at least.
**[21:12] dogo**
Yeah, he won the Pretty Boy Contest!
**[21:15] man**
But unfortunately, he won't remember it.
**[21:18] karl**
Oh, about that.
**[21:21] karl**
For the sake of his happiness,
**[21:22] karl**
I allowed him to retain just his
memory of winning the contest.
**[21:26] waku**
I guess he'll be having the "fulfilling
summer" in his name for the first time ever.
**[21:33] dogo**
What about us, then?
**[21:35] dogo**
It's almost summer break!
**[21:37] kiri**
Summer break, huh?
**[21:40] kiri**
Hey, Kyotaro. What should we do?
**[21:42] shu**
Nothing.
**[21:43] shu**
I'm tired. I just want to sleep.
**[21:46] karl**
More blissful and happy!
**[21:52] ata**
After I worked so hard
to arrange my surprise...
**[21:56] shira**
Ibusuki-senpai, what are you doing?
**[21:59] shira**
Huh? Are those loincloths?
**[22:03] ibu**
No, they're...
**[22:05] una**
Too bad.
**[22:07] una**
You wanted to spring a surprise
loincloth relay on them, right?
**[22:13] fura**
But we haven't lost to them at all.
**[22:17] fura**
Next time, we shall prove that we
are the leading men of this world!
**[22:23] fura**
--
***SIGN*** HAPPY Endless Summer
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Endless Summer!"
***SIGN*** What to do with 40 days of summer vacation? There's the beach, camping, fireworks...!
***SIGN*** It all goes away when you grow up, so enjoy it while you can! (argh)
# 8 - HAPPY Endless Summer
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:09] shu**
Such a lazy day.
**[00:13] kiri**
Shouldn't we be doing more than this?
**[00:16] kiri**
It's summer vacation, but we're hanging
out at the Kurotama Bath like usual...
**[00:20] shu**
What's the problem?
**[00:24] karl**
Hey! What are you guys doing,
lazing around here?
**[00:28] karl**
A brilliant Earth institution known
as summer vacation is transpiring!
**[00:31] karl**
We need to enjoy it, happy-style!
**[00:33] shu**
Here comes Mr. Enthusiasm.
**[00:35] waku**
It's hot enough in here already.
**[00:37] kiri**
Huh? He seems different than usual...
**[00:41] karu**
Dye your hair, pierce your ears,
ride off on a stolen bike!
**[00:47] karu**
I hear that's what Japanese
summer vacation is all about!
**[00:49] kiri**
No, I think you've been misinformed.
**[00:52] karu**
What did you say?!
**[00:55] dogo**
You're like a nerd trying to change
his image over summer break.
**[00:57] ban**
Summer break image changes
**[00:59] ban**
are a phenomenon related to increased
serotonin production in the brain,
**[01:01] ban**
which is caused by the
longer periods of sunlight.
**[01:06] ban**
Serotonin regulates the balance
between dopamine and adrenaline,
**[01:12] ban**
so it fills one with an increased desire
to stand out and attract the opposite sex.
**[01:19] karl**
Just what does a proper Japanese
summer vacation consist of, then?!
**[01:24] shu**
Good question.
**[01:26] shu**
I'd say...
**[01:29] dogo**
We are aliens!
**[01:31] shu**
For instance.
**[01:34] man**
Who put mosquito incense here?!
**[01:37] shu**
For instance.
**[01:40] kiri**
I thought it was barley tea,
but it's dipping broth!
**[01:43] shu**
For instance.
**[01:45] karu**
That's a proper Japanese summer vacation?!
**[01:47] karu**
That's not at all what I learned
in my tributary rule classes!
**[01:52] kiri**
What *did* you learn?
**[01:53] karl**
You sleep in late every day,
**[01:55] karl**
play three baseball games a day,
**[01:59] karl**
and on the last day of summer vacation
**[02:01] karl**
you cry and get your family
to help you with your homework!
**[02:03] karl**
Right?
**[02:04] waku**
So your textbook was a certain
long-running anime, was it?
**[02:08] shu**
It seems accurate... yet inaccurate.
**[02:14] karl**
Anyway, we mustn't waste a single day!
**[02:17] karl**
We need to hurry up and have a proper
summer vacation. Let's be happy together!
***SIGN*** HAPPY Endless Summer
**[03:58] sign**
Question 1
Defense Club
What is a proper summer vacation?
**[04:01] karl**
Anyone with an opinion?
**[04:02] dogo**
Me, me, me, me!
**[04:04] dogo**
Beach! Fireworks! Camping!
**[04:06] waku**
Summer's not complete without
watermelon smashing.
**[04:09] dogo**
Great idea!
**[04:10] dogo**
And what about nagashi-somen?
**[04:15] man**
Shaved ice, too.
**[04:18] kiri**
Chilled ramen is summery, too!
**[04:20] [SONG] sign**
Chilled Ramen Shaved Ice Nagashi-Somen
Watermelon Smashing Camping
Fireworks Beach
**[04:24] karl**
It's all so summery
and bursting with happiness!
**[04:28] kiri**
Let's decide what to do with a show of hands.
**[04:32] all**
I'm in!
**[04:33] kiri**
Okay, first. Who wants to go to the beach?
**[04:35] dogo**
Me, me, me!
**[04:38] shu**
Going to the beach in this season is suicide.
**[04:42] shu**
The seas will be swarming with jellyfish.
**[04:44] wak**
Well, I wouldn't want
to be swarmed...
**[04:47] dogo**
What happens if a jellyfish stings you?
**[04:49] man**
Some say it increases your chances
of developing a natto allergy.
**[04:53] dogo**
I won't be able to eat natto?! I'm out!
***SIGN*** Beach
**[04:58] kiri**
The beach is out.
**[04:59] kiri**
Next, who wants to go see fireworks?
**[05:02] kiri**
Me, me!
**[05:05] shu**
Those events are so crowded.
**[05:07] shu**
They pack you in like sardines.
**[05:10] wak**
Well, I wouldn't want
to be packed...
**[05:11] dogo**
Packed in like sardines?
You couldn't go home if you wanted to!
**[05:14] man**
To advance would be hell.
To retreat would be hell.
***SIGN*** Fireworks
**[05:19] kiri**
Fireworks are out, too?
**[05:23] kiri**
Next, who wants to go camping?
**[05:25] all**
Me!
**[05:31] shu**
Isn't camping just living out of a tent?
**[05:34] kiri**
Fine, I guess they're all out!
**[05:37] [SONG] sign**
All!!
**[05:39] karl**
We ended up not picking anything.
**[05:42] shu**
No need to rush.
**[05:43] shu**
We have a lot of time left.
**[05:44] kiri**
There's only one day left!
**[05:49] karl**
When am I gonna get to enjoy
a proper Japanese summer vacation?!
***SIGN*** Radio Calisthenics
***SIGN*** How to Rule a Tributary
**[05:59] karl**
It says radio calisthenics are a
*classic* summer vacation activity!
**[06:03] karl**
Let's do it together and happy up!
**[06:07] shu**
Can't.
**[06:08] shu**
Radio calisthenics have
to be done in the morning.
**[06:11] kiri**
But he's not against the act itself...
**[06:13] karl**
But it's our chance to enjoy
a proper summer vacation!
**[06:16] man**
Oh?
***SIGN*** Participation
Card
**[06:25] dogo**
He's camping!
**[06:26] kiri**
I think he's just living out of a tent.
**[06:28] waku**
Isn't that Rashio Taison
from the class next to ours?
***SIGN*** Rashio Taison
**[06:34] kiri**
What? That guy's in high school?
**[06:36] waku**
I heard he's failed to graduate
almost ten times.
**[06:40] dogo**
Does that mean... uh,
how old would he be now?
**[06:44] shu**
What's he doing?
**[06:45] dogo**
Camping?
**[06:47] dogo**
No... living out of a tent?
**[06:51] kiri**
What exactly is the difference between
camping and living out of a tent?
**[06:55] waku**
I feel like a certain
spirit of fun is required.
**[06:59] man**
Yeah, the primary qualifier would be
whether or not you chose to be there.
**[07:03] man**
When you do it of your own
free will, you're camping.
**[07:04] man**
When you're forced into it,
you're living out of a tent.
**[07:07] shu**
Even though everything else
is basically the same.
**[07:12] dogo**
Excuse me!
**[07:14] dogo**
What are you doing?
**[07:17] man**
He talked to him.
**[07:19] ra**
Isn't it obvious? I'm waiting
for radio calisthenics.
**[07:23] kiri**
Why?
**[07:25] ra**
I don't want to be late
to tomorrow's radio calisthenics,
**[07:29] ra**
so I'm staying the night
here instead of going home.
***SIGN*** Participation Card
**[07:37] shi**
I've been nurturing my passion for radio
calisthenics ever since I was in elementary school.
**[07:42] shi**
I've participated every morning,
without fail, and gotten every single stamp.
**[07:47] shi**
Yet on the 31st, every year,
I always fail to participate!
***SIGN*** Saturday
**[07:54] ra**
My alarm clock malfunctions...
**[08:05] ra**
I get trapped by unforeseen circumstances...
**[08:08] ra**
Then, last year, I ran into the most
ridiculous obstacle imaginable!
**[08:13] ra**
It's become a curse!
**[08:20] ra**
I can't graduate until I
get the stamp for the 31st!
**[08:25] kiri**
Is that why you haven't graduated?
**[08:27] ra**
This year, at last, I will break the curse!
**[08:30] ra**
Until I get that stamp,
**[08:32] ra**
my summer vacation will never end!
**[08:36] karl**
Everyone has their own form
of summer vacation, I guess.
**[08:46] una**
A tropical island isn't a bad
way to spend summer vacation.
**[08:50] ibu**
Indeed.
**[08:51] shira**
Aww. I guess summer vacation is over.
**[08:55] fura**
Sniff, sniff, sniff.
**[08:56] fura**
I smell the odor of unhappiness.
**[09:06] [SONG] sign**
Canceled today (31st)
due to rain
**[09:12] ra**
Why...
**[09:15] sign**
Why must you get in my way?
***SIGN*** Shirahone Martha Born November 3rd Blood Type: AB Scorpio Hobbies: Making sweets Likes: Carbohydrates, handing out handmade sweets
**[09:28] news**
*And now for the weather.*
**[09:30] news**
* We'll be seeing heavy rains*
* in the Binan City area.*
**[09:40] ibu**
Is that...
**[09:41] fura**
He's about to explode from
resentment and anger.
**[09:45] fura**
It's time for us to spread fear.
**[09:51] ra**
Until I complete radio calisthenics properly,
my summer vacation will never end!
**[09:55] ra**
You can't call it off because of rain!
**[09:59] ibu**
Your feelings are entirely reasonable.
**[10:01] ibu**
Just because it's summer vacation
**[10:03] ibu**
doesn't mean students shouldn't have
structure in their daily lives.
**[10:07] ibu**
Your daily radio calisthenics
participation is a symbol of that,
**[10:11] ibu**
but society continually gets in your way.
**[10:15] ibu**
This is unacceptable.
**[10:17] ra**
Aren't you guys... the student council...
**[10:20] ibu**
In this fallen world,
**[10:22] ibu**
don't you want to teach people
the value of proper structure?
**[10:32] ibu**
Die Verwandlung!
**[10:36] ibu**
That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
**[10:38] ibu**
Ritter Diamant!
**[10:42] ibu**
Affection and comfort...
**[10:43] ibu**
Ritter Rosenquarz!
**[10:47] ibu**
Noble and virtuous!
**[10:48] ibu**
Ritter Amethyst!
**[10:52] ibu**
We are the Furanui Knights...
**[10:54] ibu**
Edelstein!
**[10:57] ibu**
Druck!
**[10:58] ibu**
Mich!
**[10:59] ibu**
Hart!
**[11:02] ibu**
An!
**[11:11] mon**
One, two, three, four! Two, two, three, four!
**[11:17] karl**
Oh no, oh no!
**[11:19] karl**
I got caught up in the routine
and let the day slip by!
**[11:23] karl**
It's the 31st already!
**[11:25] karl**
It's the last day of summer vacation!
**[11:27] karl**
Are you just going to let it
end without doing anything?!
**[11:30] waku**
What do you want?
**[11:31] waku**
It's pouring outside.
**[11:32] waku**
We can't go anywhere.
**[11:34] waku**
I'm getting a chill. I'm going back in.
**[11:36] karl**
We've had enough of the bath!
**[11:39] karl**
We need to have a proper Japanese summer!
**[11:41] shu**
But... we can't, not in this weather.
**[11:48] shu**
Well, in that case...
**[11:50] karl**
Do we have a deal?
**[11:52] shu**
I guess.
**[11:53] kiri**
What do you mean, a deal.
**[11:56] shu**
It means we're about to have a proper
Japanese summer vacation together.
**[12:00] kiri**
What? But you were so against it! Why?
**[12:07] karl**
Someone's unhappy!
**[12:13] mon**
One, two, three, four!
**[12:15] mon**
Two, two, three, four!
**[12:17] mon**
Three, two, three, four!
**[12:20] mon**
Four, two, three, four!
**[12:20] man**
Huh? I can't stop...
**[12:22] mon**
Five, two, three, four!
**[12:24] mon**
Six, two, three, four!
**[12:36] mon**
Until I achieve my heart's desire,
**[12:38] mon**
I'll never let summer vacation end!
**[12:41] mon**
It will be August 31st forever!
**[12:50] kiri**
What's he doing?
**[12:51] man**
He's forcing the whole town
to do radio calisthenics!
**[12:55] dogo**
I can't believe how inconsiderate he is!
**[12:57] waku**
Yeah.
**[12:58] kiri**
Leader, what should we do?
**[13:00] shu**
Are we still doing that?
**[13:02] karl**
He's currently in the depths
of anger and suffering!
**[13:06] karl**
We need to make him happy!
**[13:08] karl**
Or so I'd like to say...
**[13:10] karl**
But first we need to have
our proper summer vacation!
**[13:14] karl**
Let's go, everyone!
**[13:19] mon**
Hey! Don't ignore me!
**[13:21] mon**
Wait up! Come back!
**[13:24] karl**
First, we're going to the beach!
**[13:27] dogo**
It's f-freezing!
**[13:31] karl**
Everyone... smile!
**[13:41] karl**
Now, time for watermelon smashing!
**[13:44] kiri**
Wakura-senpai, more to the right!
**[13:47] waku**
This way?
**[13:50] kiri**
No, no! Right! Right!
**[13:52] waku**
What? This way?
**[13:58] kiri**
Wakura-senpai...
**[14:01] waku**
Aw, so close.
**[14:03] karu**
Time to get moving!
**[14:05] karu**
Next up is...
**[14:09] mon**
Don't ignore me!
**[14:12] shu**
Sorry, but we're a bit busy right now.
**[14:15] shu**
What's next?
**[14:16] karl**
Nagashi-somen, go!
**[14:18] karl**
Karurururu!
**[14:21] mon**
Wait! Wait!
**[14:25] mon**
You just gotta have cold stuff in summer!
**[14:38] karl**
Okay, time to move on!
**[14:40] karl**
Where are we going next?
**[14:42] karl**
Camping!
**[14:43] man**
Not living in tents?
**[14:44] dogo**
If it's in the spirit of fun,
it's camping! Right?
**[14:49] waku**
That's right.
**[14:50] kiri**
This feels less "spirit of fun"
and more "spirit of fear," though...
**[14:58] karl**
Everyone, fight hard!
**[15:00] karl**
Fight hard, fight happy!
**[15:07] mon**
I won't let you escape this time!
**[15:09] waku**
He's back.
**[15:11] dogo**
So persistent!
**[15:13] man**
He knows we're busy right now, dammit!
**[15:15] kiri**
Taishi?
**[15:19] man**
Focus on lighting the fire.
**[15:21] mon**
I'm telling you not to ignore me!
**[15:26] mon**
He did it!
**[15:28] kiri**
Thank you, monster!
**[15:29] kiri**
Thanks so much!
**[15:30] mon**
Heck, it's nothing...
**[15:32] kiri**
A little token of our gratitude.
**[15:34] mon**
I'm honored.
**[15:40] mon**
Hey! Hey!
**[15:43] kiri**
I guess we should deal with this first?
**[15:45] shu**
Yeah, I guess we should.
**[15:48] karl**
Yeah, I guess we'll transform!
**[15:50] karl**
Become Karl's Knights Happy Kiss
and save the people!
**[16:04] karl**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[16:40] karl**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[16:54] karl**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[17:07] karl**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[17:21] karl**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[17:33] karl**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[17:38] karl**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[17:41] karl**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[17:43] karl**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[17:46] karl**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[17:48] karl**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[17:51] karl**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[17:55] karl**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[17:59] karl**
Knights contract complete!
**[18:02] man**
Stop dragging others into
your personal obsession!
**[18:04] dogo**
If you wanna do radio calisthenics that bad,
just do them by yourself!
**[18:08] mon**
But, at this rate, it will never end!
**[18:10] mon**
I need my last summer as a
student to end in perfection!
**[18:14] shu**
Is it really something
to get that worked up about?
**[18:17] shu**
You can still do radio calisthenics
even if you're not a student.
**[18:21] kiri**
My grandpa does radio calisthenics
every morning all year round.
**[18:28] mon**
You can do radio calisthenics
even if you're not a student?
**[18:34] mon**
You can do radio calisthenics
even if it's not summer vacation?
**[18:39] mon**
So even if summer vacation ends...
**[18:42] mon**
Even if I graduate from school...
**[18:44] mon**
My radio calisthenics will continue forever!
**[18:49] mon**
Now! Use your powers
combined to make him happy!
**[18:53] mon**
Are you happy?
**[18:54] mon**
Yes!
**[18:54] mon**
Are you happy?
**[18:56] mon**
Yes!
**[18:56] mon**
Are you happy?
**[18:57] mon**
Yes!
**[18:58] mon**
Are you happy?
**[18:59] mon**
Yes!
**[18:59] mon**
Are you happy?
**[19:00] mon**
Yes!
**[19:01] mon**
Let's happy hour!
**[19:04] mon**
Happy and Set!
**[19:17] mon**
Return to happiness!
**[19:20] mon**
Happy and Turn!
**[19:31] mon**
I feel radio calis-cleansed.
**[19:39] shu**
Happy End!
**[19:41] shu**
Happy Powder!
**[19:52] ra**
Huh?
**[19:53] ra**
What am I doing out in the mountains?
**[19:59] shu**
It's morning, huh?
**[20:01] karl**
It's morning!
**[20:02] karl**
Time to do radio calisthenics!
**[20:07] ra**
Okay, let's look alive here!
**[20:09] ra**
We'll start with some arm swings!
**[20:14] ra**
One, two, three, four!
**[20:17] ra**
Two, two, three, four!
**[20:21] ra**
Four, two, three, four!
**[20:24] ra**
Five, two, three, four!
**[20:28] ra**
Six, two, three, four!
**[20:32] ra**
C'mon! I can't hear you!
**[20:33] ra**
You! Move your arms more!
**[20:36] ra**
Yes sir!
**[20:40] una**
Now, now.
**[20:41] una**
We'll have more chances in the new school term.
**[20:53] shira**
Wait a minute, Ibusuki-senpai!
**[20:59] kiri**
By the way, what was the
deal you made with Karls?
**[21:06] (Flashback) kar**
If you let me have a proper summer vacation,
**[21:08] (Flashback) kar**
I'll grant any wish you want with magic.
**[21:12] kiri**
So, what did you wish for?
**[21:14] shu**
For summer vacation to last one more day.
**[21:17] shu**
I want to spend it doing nothing.
**[21:22] kiri**
Which means today is August 31st again?
**[21:26] waku**
So, in a strange way,
he got his heart's desire.
**[21:30] kiri**
Should we tell him?
**[21:31] waku**
No, no reason to.
**[21:33] dogo**
W-Wait a minute!
**[21:35] dogo**
Then today isn't the 31st! It's the 32nd!
**[21:39] man**
What would the 32nd be?
**[21:41] dogo**
If we have a second 31st,
it would be the 32nd!
**[21:46] dogo**
Or would it be a first September 1st?
**[21:48] dogo**
Would that make tomorrow
the second September 1st?
**[21:54] waku**
It's a real philosophical
conundrum, isn't it?
**[21:58] shu**
Let's just not think about it.
**[22:01] kiri**
Good idea.
**[22:02] kiri**
It's still summer vacation,
so let's do something fun!
**[22:05] shu**
I want to take it as easy as possible.
**[22:07] dogo**
Me, me, me!
**[22:09] dogo**
Fireworks, fireworks, fireworks!
**[22:10] dogo**
Let's do a fireworks show!
**[22:11] man**
Is a fireworks show a thing that you do?
**[22:14] man**
They're a thing you go to, I thought.
**[22:15] waku**
Yeah.
**[22:16] dogo**
Let's go to a fireworks show
and firework it up!
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** HAPPY Dice
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to HAPPY Dice!
***SIGN*** It's cultural festival time again, and everyone's running around in a panic to get ready! Of course, in the anime industry, every day is like the day before a cultural festival (sigh)
***SIGN*** The club brings out a party die. What'll we get? What'll we get? La la la laaa!
***SIGN***
# 9 - HAPPY Dice
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
***SIGN*** HAPPY Dice
**[01:47] shu**
Cultural festival, eh?
**[01:49] shu**
Yeah.
**[01:49] shu**
Cultural festival, huh?
**[01:51] shu**
Yeah.
**[01:53] shu**
A festival of culture,
by students, for students, huh?
**[01:57] kiri**
Just call it a cultural festival.
**[01:59] kiri**
But our club hasn't figured out what
we're going to do yet, have we?
**[02:02] waku**
We keep whispering "cultural festival" to
make it sound like we're thinking about it.
**[02:08] dogo**
If the Defense Club doesn't do anything,
the student council's gonna get on our asses.
**[02:12] dogo**
"If you don't participate,
you won't get any funds."
**[02:15] man**
And, more generally speaking, our nation's
educational principles require student attendance,
**[02:21] man**
in other words, participation,
in cultural festivals through high school.
**[02:24] man**
It will be counted on our attendance days,
so in that sense we really should do something.
**[02:28] shu**
That's why I've been thinking all this time.
**[02:31] kiri**
Uh, you haven't really been thinking.
**[02:33] waku**
It looks like you've just been
comfortably soaking in the hot water.
**[02:37] waku**
Like usual.
**[02:39] dogo**
We need you to get a grip already!
**[02:41] dogo**
We rolled a die and decided that you are
our cultural festival leader, Kyotaro-senpai!
**[02:46] shu**
Yeah, I know.
**[02:49] kar**
Oh?
**[02:51] kar**
There's a not-happy vibe going on in here.
**[02:54] kar**
What's the matter?
**[02:56] shu**
We can't figure out what to
do for the cultural festival.
**[02:59] shu**
Any ideas, Karls?
**[03:01] kiri**
There he goes, leaving it to someone else.
**[03:03] waku**
He doesn't even know about
Earth cultural festivals.
**[03:06] shu**
I just think Karls might have an idea.
**[03:09] shu**
Something that will make everyone happy.
**[03:11] kar**
Make everyone happy?
**[03:14] kar**
That sounds great!
**[03:15] shu**
See?
**[03:17] shu**
What do you think we should do?
**[03:18] kar**
Something that will lead my
vassals to happiness, of course!
**[03:22] shu**
Like what?
**[03:23] kar**
Maybe... something that will
make them smile happily!
**[03:25] shu**
Good idea.
**[03:27] kar**
Yeah! Being happy is the best!
**[03:30] shu**
Yeah.
**[03:31] kiri**
I'm not sure we can leave
things up to these two.
**[03:33] waku**
We're not gonna make it in time.
**[03:34] dogo**
We need to think of something.
**[03:36] man**
Let's search the club room tomorrow.
**[03:39] man**
We might find a relic of some past festival.
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[03:45] kiri**
What are these weird old sedge hats?
**[03:47] dogo**
Maybe they were used in
some kind of performance?
**[03:49] dogo**
A performance using sedge hats would be...
**[03:52] kiri**
The loach-scooping dance, maybe?
**[03:53] waku**
That uses baskets.
**[03:55] waku**
Though I'd love to see you
scooping loaches, Ryoma-kun.
**[03:58] kiri**
R-Really?
**[04:00] shu**
We could use this.
***SIGN*** The person to my right
**[04:03] sign**
Here.
**[04:05] sign**
What's that?
**[04:09] sign**
Um... These are party dice.
**[04:13] sign**
I see.
**[04:14] dogo**
It says stuff like "roughly"
and "gently" on it.
**[04:19] man**
This one says stuff like "to their senpai",
**[04:22] man**
"to the person on their right",
**[04:24] man**
"to a stranger".
**[04:27] kiri**
This one says stuff like
"give a shoulder massage"
**[04:29] kiri**
and "carry like a princess".
**[04:31] waku**
Titillating stuff.
**[04:34] shu**
Anyway, let's try it out.
**[04:36] shu**
If it's fun, we can use it at
tomorrow's cultural festival.
**[04:41] dogo**
Do it?
**[04:42] dogo**
Us, you mean?
***SIGN*** Now
**[04:44] shu**
Anyway... Rehearsal, start!
**[04:47] kar**
Okay!
**[04:49] kar**
What'll we roll? What'll we roll?
**[04:52] kar**
Nya-nya-nya-nyan!
**[04:54] shu**
There.
**[04:56] shu**
"Immediately..."
**[04:58] shu**
"The person to my left..."
**[05:00] shu**
"Must act as an invisible chair
for the oldest person present."
**[05:05] kiri**
Um...
**[05:06] kiri**
Does that mean...
**[05:08] shu**
The person to my left,
that is Chiro,
**[05:12] shu**
must act as an invisible chair
for the oldest person here.
**[05:16] shu**
In other words, Nanao-san.
**[05:19] dogo**
I-Invisible chair?
**[05:22] dogo**
For Nanao-senpai?
**[05:24] shu**
Yeah. Can't wait to see it.
**[05:26] karu**
Yeah! Fun is fun!
**[05:28] karu**
Okay, let's get happy!
**[05:32] waku**
Be gentle.
**[05:33] dogo**
Th-That's my line!
**[05:37] waku**
This is a very comfortable seat, Ichiro-kun.
**[05:43] waku**
You're slender, yet you seem
to have very developed thighs.
**[05:46] dogo**
H-How long do I have to hold this?
**[05:49] shu**
Um. It doesn't say.
**[05:52] shu**
Until you give up, I guess?
**[05:54] dogo**
Then I give! I give up!
**[05:57] waku**
That's too bad.
**[05:58] waku**
I was hoping to relax a little while longer.
**[06:03] waku**
I can, can't I, Ichiro-kun?
**[06:06] kiri**
Senpai is such a sadist...
**[06:07] dogo**
This is a lot more painful than it looks!
**[06:10] dogo**
B-Besides, Nanao-senpai's scent...
**[06:13] dogo**
It's like... it smells so good,
I can't concentrate!
**[06:16] shu**
Oh, does Nanao-san smell good?
**[06:19] kiri**
What shampoo do you use?
**[06:22] waku**
It's mild, good for hair and skin,
and I like the champagne rose scent.
**[06:29] dogo**
C-Champagne rose...
**[06:31] dogo**
I give up.
**[06:34] waku**
Excuse me. Are you all right?
**[06:36] dogo**
O-Of course I'm not okay!
**[06:39] waku**
It's true, your heart
does seem to be pounding.
**[06:44] kar**
That was great!
**[06:45] kar**
They're exuding a happy aura!
**[06:47] kiri**
A happy aura?
**[06:49] shu**
It looks like it to me.
**[06:50] man**
Is this game really okay?
**[06:52] kar**
Of course it is!
**[06:54] kar**
They both look so happy!
***SIGN*** Binan Festival
**[07:02] [SONG] sign**
Binan Festival
**[07:07] sa**
How can they persistently hold this
ridiculous event year upon year?
***SIGN*** Sai Goro
**[07:11] sa**
What's the school thinking? The government?
**[07:14] sa**
Do schools really need a cultural festival?
**[07:17] sa**
Is it absolutely indispensable
as part of a general education?
**[07:19] sa**
The answer is no!
**[07:21] sa**
These are the dice created by me,
for me alone, Sai Goro.
**[07:26] sa**
I'll come up with a significant
plan for the day and carry it out!
**[07:30] sa**
I won't be swept away by their attitudes!
**[07:36] sa**
Today I will, with my fellow entrance examinees,
individually study for entrance exams.
**[07:42] sa**
Perfect.
**[07:45] ata**
In this decadent school, he's a rare case
of someone rigidly setting their own schedule.
**[07:50] una**
Even if it is with dice.
**[07:52] shira**
I think the nerdy kids are the cutest!
**[07:57] furu**
Then let us begin, Edelstein!
**[08:02] una**
Sai Goro-kun, isn't it?
**[08:04] sai**
What of it?
**[08:05] ina**
Would you like to join us in bringing
the hammer of judgment down
**[08:09] ina**
upon this fallen school
and its ridiculous cultural festival?
**[08:13] shi**
By becoming a monster.
**[08:21] shi**
Die Verwandlung!
**[08:24] shi**
That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
**[08:27] shi**
Ritter Diamant!
**[08:30] shi**
Affection and comfort...
**[08:31] shi**
Ritter Rosenquarz!
**[08:35] shi**
Noble and virtuous!
**[08:37] shi**
Ritter Amethyst!
**[08:40] shi**
We are the Furanui Knights...
**[08:43] shi**
Edelstein!
**[08:46] shi**
Druck!
**[08:47] shi**
Mich!
**[08:47] shi**
Hart!
**[08:50] shi**
An!
**[08:59] mon**
Rollin', rollin'!
***SIGN*** Earth Defense Club (lol)
**[09:03] kiri**
We're doing it again?
**[09:05] shu**
Well, it has been kind of fun.
**[09:08] man**
You probably think that because you
haven't been through it yourself.
**[09:12] karl**
But fun stuff is good!
**[09:15] karl**
And it makes people happy!
**[09:17] karl**
Let's keep it up!
**[09:18] shu**
Okay, next, Tai-Tai will roll the dice.
**[09:21] man**
Why me?!
**[09:23] man**
What'll we roll? What'll we roll?
**[09:27] man**
Nya-nya-nya-nyan!
**[09:29] kiri**
There's a man who knows how to act.
**[09:31] man**
Given your attitudes, if I choose not to do it,
I'll be called a party-pooper.
**[09:36] dogo**
Smart! That's the Taishi I know!
**[09:38] shu**
Okay, I'll read out the result.
**[09:41] shu**
I, in other words Tai-Tai,
**[09:44] shu**
will immediately to a friend...
that would be Chiro, in this case...
**[09:47] dogo**
Me again?!
**[09:49] man**
You had it coming.
**[09:51] shu**
...put an arm around his shoulders
and gently read the lines on the note.
**[09:54] shu**
In other words, Tai-Tai must
immediately put an arm around Chiro
**[09:58] shu**
and gently read the lines on this note.
**[10:01] kiri**
What are the lines?
**[10:05] kiri**
What does it say?
**[10:07] man**
Something I never thought I'd say in my life.
**[10:12] shu**
Okay, Tai-Tai. Put your arm
gently around Chiro's shoulders.
**[10:16] man**
Don't make it sound so easy!
**[10:18] wa**
If you want to hate someone, hate the dice.
**[10:21] kiri**
Hmm? Did you just click your tongue?
**[10:25] man**
I certainly did not.
**[10:28] man**
It's not like I'm a delinquent.
**[10:30] man**
Well, here I go.
**[10:32] shu**
Okay, go for it.
**[10:37] dogo**
I dunno about this...
**[10:38] man**
That's my line.
**[10:41] shu**
Now, read the words on the note.
**[10:43] dogo**
Is it really that bad?
**[10:47] dogo**
Let's just get it over with!
**[10:51] man**
Very well.
**[10:53] man**
But I'm only doing this
because the dice made me.
**[10:56] dogo**
Just say it already!
**[11:03] man**
The next thing I knew,
I realized my eyes were always on you.
**[11:08] man**
Your most trivial mannerisms
cause my heart to skip a beat.
**[11:11] man**
Tell me, please...
**[11:14] man**
is this love?
**[11:19] waku**
You finally said it! Great job.
**[11:22] man**
I was forced to say it!
**[11:24] kiri**
But you put so much emotion into it!
**[11:26] kar**
Yeah, yeah!
**[11:27] kar**
You're radiating a happy aura!
**[11:29] shu**
This plan is a lot of fun.
**[11:32] man**
Shuzenji-senpai, Kirishima-senpai...
**[11:34] man**
you're just smiling because
you haven't had to do it.
**[11:36] dogo**
That's right! Is this really
what we're gonna do?
**[11:39] shu**
Well, it seems like a pain
to come up with something else.
**[11:43] sai**
Rollin' rollin'...
**[11:45] sai**
What a ridiculous set of dice!
**[11:48] sai**
They must pay!
***SIGN*** Karls Born February 4th Blood Type: O Aquarius Hobbies: Playing in the water Likes: Crayfish, hot baths
***SIGN*** Binan Festival
***SIGN*** Oden
***SIGN*** Curry Rice Takoyaki
**[12:12] dogo**
This isn't good, Kyotaro-senpai.
**[12:14] dogo**
We're not getting any customers.
**[12:17] kar**
I wonder why!
**[12:18] kar**
It would make everybody happy...
**[12:21] waku**
By the way, why are you in that form, Karls?
**[12:25] kar**
Everyone's transforming into something today,
**[12:27] kar**
so I transformed into a human!
**[12:29] shu**
Cosplay?
**[12:30] wak**
Ah, I see...
**[12:32] wak**
All that aside,
**[12:34] wak**
what should we do, given the situation?
**[12:37] man**
Looks like we'll just need to have
Shuzenji-senpai act as a shill and roll the die.
**[12:42] shu**
That's strange.
**[12:44] shu**
I wonder why nobody's coming.
**[12:46] kiri**
They might not, given that sign.
***SIGN*** Hey, Bastards, Get Over Here! The All-Men Heart-Racing Dice Party Plaza
**[12:53] man**
What is that? Creepy.
**[12:56] shu**
Isn't it flashy enough?
**[12:57] dogo**
I don't think that's the problem...
**[13:00] waku**
Well, it accurately conveys
our lack of effort.
**[13:03] man**
And our desire to never, ever do it.
**[13:07] kiri**
We'll be in trouble if this keeps up, though.
**[13:10] kiri**
I mean, they're looking at us...
**[13:12] kiri**
The student council.
**[13:14] kar**
Why don't we all do it together, then,
and attract people through the fun we're having!
**[13:18] waku**
That might be the thing to do.
**[13:20] dogo**
Okay. Kyotaro-senpai, take it away!
***SIGN*** Give a kiss
**[13:23] man**
Here you go.
**[13:25] shu**
No way. It's embarrassing.
**[13:27] dogo**
How dare you?!
**[13:29] man**
I agree! We all did it!
**[13:31] man**
We swallowed our pride.
**[13:32] waku**
Kyotaro-kun, I don't think you have a choice.
**[13:36] dogo**
Go on, roll the die already!
**[13:39] man**
Do it!
**[13:40] shu**
Fine, I'll do it.
**[13:42] shu**
If I do it, you'll leave me alone,
right? Fine, fine.
**[13:44] kar**
He's gonna do it!
**[13:45] kar**
Great!
**[13:47] kar**
Let's all roll the die happily!
**[13:48] kar**
What'll we roll? What'll we roll?
**[13:51] kar**
Nya-nya-nya-nyan!
***SIGN*** Hey, Bastards, Get Over Here! The All-Men Heart-Racing Dice Party Plaza
**[13:53] shu**
There.
**[13:55] shu**
Go.
**[13:56] dogo**
Okay, let's read it!
**[13:59] dogo**
Right now, I will princess-carry
the person to my left!
**[14:04] dogo**
Then he'll feed me!
**[14:06] dogo**
This is incredible!
**[14:08] man**
And then the person you
carry needs to feed you!
**[14:11] man**
It's perfect!
**[14:13] kiri**
W-Wait a minute!
**[14:15] kiri**
The person to your left would be...
**[14:17] waku**
It's clearly you, Ryoma-kun.
**[14:20] waku**
No, no, no...
**[14:21] dogo**
Don't you run away, Ryoma-senpai!
**[14:23] man**
You think we'll allow it?!
**[14:25] kiri**
Hey. You guys are looking really serious...
**[14:28] man**
You bet we are.
**[14:30] dogo**
After humiliating us like that yesterday,
**[14:32] dogo**
you really think we'll let you walk away?
**[14:35] man**
Precisely.
**[14:38] shu**
I guess I must.
**[14:39] kiri**
Why do you have to drag me into it?!
**[14:42] shu**
It's not my fault you were
next to me, Ryo-chin.
**[14:45] kiri**
But we're picking up an audience...
**[14:48] all**
Hey, I think they're about to do something!
**[14:51] all**
Shuzenji is gonna princess-carry Kirishima
and get him to feed him, apparently.
**[14:55] all**
The Defense Club is so stupid!
**[14:59] shu**
Ryo-chin.
**[15:01] kiri**
Let's get this over with.
**[15:03] kiri**
Eek!
**[15:04] man**
Wow, he just said "eek!"
**[15:06] man**
Yeah, he said "eek."
**[15:08] man**
Why "eek"?
**[15:09] man**
B-Because you swept me up so suddenly...
**[15:15] shu**
Do you know what needs to happen after this?
**[15:17] shu**
Y-Yeah.
**[15:19] shu**
You need to feed me while I'm carrying you.
**[15:24] shu**
Chiro.
**[15:24] dogo**
Coming, coming!
**[15:25] dogo**
The cake to be fed.
**[15:31] kiri**
W-Well... Here I go...
**[15:34] shu**
Ready when you are.
**[15:36] boy**
Hey, hey, he's doing it!
**[15:40] kiri**
Okay. Say ahh.
**[15:42] shu**
Ahh.
**[15:48] shu**
It's delicious, Ryo-chin.
**[15:52] boy**
Amazing! He did it!
**[15:54] boy**
Those two are nuts!
**[15:59] boy**
Great job, Defense Club!
**[16:01] boy**
I love it!
**[16:02] boy**
Do more!
**[16:05] ata**
Enjoy your celebrations while you can.
**[16:08] una**
Nice one!
**[16:10] shira**
I'm blushing!
**[16:11] dogo**
Wow, wow! So embarrassing...
**[16:14] man**
We may have pushed them too far.
**[16:16] waku**
But the audience seems to be enjoying it...
**[16:19] dogo**
Well, Kyotaro-senpai and
Ryoma-senpai are really close,
**[16:23] dogo**
so maybe it's okay?
**[16:24] mon**
What... what is this feeling of unity?
**[16:28] mon**
Dice are supposed to exist simply as a
tool to help you decide what to do.
**[16:33] mon**
To think they could be used to gather
such attention, to bring such happiness...
**[16:37] ata**
Why are you acting impressed?
**[16:43] ata**
What's that?
**[16:45] ata**
A new cosplay?
**[16:46] ata**
Cool!
**[16:48] ata**
You hate them, don't you?
**[16:50] ata**
That's why you became a monster, isn't it?
**[16:52] ata**
Dice Monster!
**[16:56] kiri**
Wait, you're a monster?
**[16:58] shu**
For real? I had no idea.
**[17:01] shu**
But if you're a monster,
why didn't you attack?
**[17:04] mon**
W-Well...
**[17:06] mon**
O-Obviously, at the start of this,
I intended to bring the hammer of judgment
**[17:10] mon**
down upon you for your unscrupulous
use of dice and your distracting activities...
**[17:15] mon**
But for some reason, I got drawn in...
**[17:18] mon**
The idea of using a die like that
to make so many people happy...
**[17:24] mon**
it was exhilarating!
**[17:28] waku**
Exhilarating?
**[17:30] waku**
Why didn't you just join in, then?
**[17:33] waku**
We could have all enjoyed it together.
**[17:37] mon**
W-We could all enjoy it together?
**[17:39] shu**
Yeah, we could have had fun together.
**[17:42] mon**
I see... So dice can be
used like that, too...
**[17:47] shu**
You really wanted to enjoy
the cultural festival from the start, didn't you?
**[17:52] ata**
This is nonsense!
**[17:53] ata**
Don't let them distract you!
**[17:55] ata**
Fight!
**[17:56] ata**
Are you a monster or aren't you?
**[17:58] mon**
B-But...
**[17:59] ata**
Bring your hammer of anger down upon them!
**[18:03] kar**
Everyone! You gotta save the monster!
**[18:06] kar**
He doesn't want to fight!
**[18:08] kar**
Make him happy at once!
**[18:10] shu**
That's right.
**[18:11] shu**
I don't want to fight
against Dice-kun, either.
**[18:14] shu**
Yeah.
**[18:15] shu**
That's right!
**[18:16] shu**
Okay!
**[18:17] kar**
In that case...
**[18:19] kar**
My magic knights of happiness, come on!
**[18:31] kar**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[19:07] kar**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[19:22] kar**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[19:35] kar**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[19:48] kar**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[20:01] kar**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[20:06] kar**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[20:08] kar**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[20:11] kar**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[20:13] kar**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[20:16] kar**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[20:18] kar**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[20:22] kar**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[20:26] kar**
Knights contract complete!
**[20:31] shu**
Dice-kun, let's play dice games together.
**[20:34] shu**
It'll be fun.
**[20:36] kiri**
Though it can be embarrassing...
**[20:38] waku**
Watching friends embarrass themselves
is the most fun a person can have.
**[20:43] waku**
Wakura-senpai... you really are a sadist.
**[20:46] karu**
Okay, everyone.
**[20:47] karu**
Let's make him happy!
**[20:49] karu**
With that again?
**[20:50] karu**
Of course!
**[20:52] karu**
Okay, go!
**[20:54] karu**
Now! Use your powers
combined to make him happy!
**[20:57] karu**
Are you happy?
**[20:59] karu**
Yes!
**[20:59] karu**
Are you happy?
**[21:00] karu**
Yes!
**[21:01] karu**
Are you happy?
**[21:02] karu**
Yes!
**[21:02] karu**
Are you happy?
**[21:03] karu**
Yes!
**[21:04] karu**
Are you happy?
**[21:05] karu**
Yes!
**[21:05] karu**
Let's happy hour!
**[21:09] karu**
Happy and Set!
**[21:22] karu**
Return to happiness!
**[21:25] karu**
Happy and Turn!
**[21:36] dice**
Feels like I'm on a roll...
**[21:43] dice**
Happy End!
**[21:45] dice**
Happy Powder!
**[21:51] sai**
What have I been...?
**[21:53] waku**
So the dice monster was Sai Goro-kun, huh?
**[21:56] shu**
Now, let's roll the dice together.
**[21:59] shu**
Okay!
**[22:05] ata**
"Happy end," my eye.
**[22:07] ata**
There are no such things as happy ends!
**[22:11] una**
Ata!
**[22:12] shira**
Ibusuki-senpai, wait up!
***SIGN*** HAPPY Old Men
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Old Men."
***SIGN*** Shuzenji Kyotaro's dream is to be able to space out forever.
***SIGN*** At last, he'll have his dream! Ah, I wish I could space out! (I mean it)
# 10 - HAPPY Old Men
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:15] ibu**
*K-Kyo-chan!*
***SIGN*** HAPPY Old Men
**[02:10] dogo**
Hooray!
**[02:11] dogo**
First bath of the day!
**[02:13] dogo**
Happy!
**[02:15] waku**
It happens every day,
**[02:16] waku**
but I think it's lovely that Ichiro-kun gets
just as delighted about it each time.
**[02:23] man**
He's a bit of a simpleton,
but I kind of envy him.
**[02:27] kiri**
Yeah.
**[02:29] kiri**
Being able to enjoy the same
thing over and over is nice.
**[02:32] kiri**
Kyotaro is the same way, really.
**[02:34] man**
He enjoys things?
**[02:37] man**
By the way, where *is* Shuzenji-senpai?
**[02:39] kiri**
Oh?
**[02:40] man**
I was sure he came in before us...
**[02:43] waku**
You think that might be him?
**[02:46] dogo**
This is heaven!
**[02:48] kiri**
Kyotaro!
**[02:51] kiri**
Wake up! Open your eyes!
**[02:54] dogo**
This is terrible!
**[02:55] man**
I think he might need
mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
**[03:08] shu**
Achoo!
**[03:11] dogo**
Did you sneeze in the bath?
**[03:12] dogo**
You're not cold, are you?
**[03:14] man**
That's your first comment?
**[03:17] wak**
Shouldn't you be happy he's breathing?
**[03:20] dogo**
Oh, yeah! That's right!
**[03:22] dogo**
I'm so glad you're alive, Kyotaro-senpai!
**[03:26] shu**
Was I sleeping in the bath again?
**[03:30] kiri**
At the bottom of the bath!
**[03:32] kiri**
That was a close call! I guess we can't
let you in the bath by yourself...
**[03:35] wak**
I can't believe you're a high-school
student who needs a caretaker.
**[03:38] dogo**
Ryoma-senpai, you need to
be more attentive to him!
**[03:41] kiri**
It's my fault?
**[03:43] man**
Why *are* you constantly napping, anyway?
**[03:46] waku**
Because it feels good, I assume...
**[03:49] shu**
That's part of it, but...
I think I like dreaming.
**[03:54] kiri**
Escaping from reality?
**[03:55] shu**
I don't think that's it.
**[03:58] shu**
I like it when I'm dreaming, but I never
really remember what I was dreaming about.
**[04:03] shu**
I feel like it's something important...
**[04:06] shu**
but I don't know what it is.
**[04:08] dogo**
He's as forgetful as an old man.
**[04:11] kiri**
He's always been this way.
I'm used to it by now.
**[04:14] man**
By the way,
**[04:16] man**
did you know that the first bath of the
day is the most dangerous one for seniors?
**[04:20] man**
No one's around yet, so the room isn't warmed up,
which lowers their body temperature.
**[04:25] man**
However, the bathwater itself is all the
hotter for having no one in it yet.
**[04:30] man**
The change in temperature puts a strain
on the body, particularly the heart.
**[04:33] dogo**
What?! Then we'd better not
let Kyotaro-senpai in first!
**[04:37] dogo**
Strain on the heart sounds really bad!
**[04:40] kiri**
That only matters if Kyotaro
is an old man, though.
**[04:44] waku**
Talking to Kyotaro-kun does sometimes
feel like talking to a much older person.
**[04:50] man**
I agree.
**[04:51] dogo**
So do I.
**[04:52] kiri**
I've been around him so long,
I guess I'm kind of numb to it.
**[04:56] shu**
But if I have to die,
I'd like to die in a hot bath.
**[05:00] shu**
It's so warm. Feels so good.
**[05:03] shu**
I feel like I could just slip away...
**[05:06] dogo**
Kyotaro-senpai!
**[05:07] dogo**
We're back to square one!
**[05:13] shu**
Did I fall asleep again?
**[05:15] kiri**
Yeah, you did.
**[05:17] kiri**
Ryoma-kun, maybe you should give some
thought to being Kyotaro-kun's 24-hour caretaker.
**[05:23] kiri**
I'm starting to think you're right.
**[05:25] dogo**
So you'll be roommates after
you graduate high school, huh?
**[05:28] man**
Given the active risk to
Shuzenji-senpai's life,
**[05:32] man**
I agree that a roommate
situation might be best.
**[05:34] kiri**
W-Well, I don't know about
that exact arrangement...
**[05:38] kiri**
I certainly won't abandon him, though.
**[05:40] waku**
In other words, you'll be caring
for him your whole life.
**[05:43] kiri**
Why would you say that?!
**[05:45] kiri**
What is it?
**[05:46] shu**
The truth is, I...
**[05:50] shu**
I wasn't first in the bath.
**[05:56] kiri**
So what?
**[05:57] shu**
I'm just saying, Karls was
the first one in the bath.
**[06:02] waku**
We're not taking about who was
first in the bath anymore.
**[06:06] dogo**
He's so far behind, it's kind of amazing.
**[06:08] man**
Shuzenji-senpai's old mannishness
really is exceptional.
**[06:13] waku**
Well, I can't say he wouldn't fit
right in with a group of seniors...
**[06:22] shu**
What a pleasant bath.
**[06:24] kiri**
He really would fit in at an old folks' home.
**[06:28] kar**
Happy, happy!
**[06:35] dogo**
Huh? That's odd...
**[06:38] dogo**
Why am I so tired?
**[06:40] dogo**
I feel like I've aged sixty years in a day.
**[06:44] man**
That's not possi—
**[06:47] man**
You're old!
**[06:48] dogo**
You're an old man too, Taishi!
**[06:51] kiri**
What's all the yelling about?
**[06:54] dogo**
What's going on?
**[06:56] kiri**
Wait! Look at that!
**[06:58] kiri**
It's not just us!
**[07:01] dogo**
Is this because we were calling
Kyotaro-senpai an old man yesterday?
**[07:05] dogo**
Some kind of curse?
**[07:06] man**
You think Shuzenji-senpai got
mad and put a curse on us?
**[07:11] kiri**
No way! Kyotaro doesn't
have the power to do that.
**[07:15] waku**
Even if he doesn't have
the power to curse people,
**[07:17] waku**
he does seem to have the
power to get wishes granted.
**[07:22] shu**
That's right.
**[07:23] shu**
Last night, I might have wished that
instead of going to school every day,
**[07:28] shu**
I could just space out as an old man.
**[07:30] kiri**
So you *did* wish it?!
**[07:31] man**
What are you going to do
about this, Shuzenji-senpai?
**[07:34] shu**
What, you aren't happy about it?
**[07:36] dogo**
Of course we aren't!
**[07:38] waku**
Ryoma-kun, it looks like you'll have
to take care of all of us from now on.
**[07:42] kiri**
Come on, I'm just as old
as the rest of you...
**[07:47] kiri**
But why did we suddenly get so old?
**[07:52] mon**
They're aging at a nice pace!
**[07:55] mon**
Now, go on, keep aging!
**[08:02] kiri**
It's odd. I feel like...
I'm getting even older...
**[08:07] man**
We need to find the cause,
or we'll be in trouble.
**[08:11] waku**
It's true. Any older and it'll just
ruin my character design.
**[08:17] shu**
Too much trouble.
**[08:18] kiri**
What, you don't mind the
thought of getting older?
**[08:22] shu**
Well, we could skip class
and no one would get mad.
**[08:26] shu**
I think I'm okay staying like this.
**[08:28] kiri**
That's your reasoning?
**[08:29] dogo**
I see! If you're an old man,
you don't have to go to class!
**[08:34] man**
I'd rather not sacrifice my youth
just to get out of class, though...
**[08:38] mas**
Wow, aging like that would really stink.
**[08:42] mas**
I hope I stay beautiful as I age!
**[08:45] dogo**
Oh, Martha!
**[08:47] una**
My, they've aged even more
than I was expecting.
**[08:52] ata**
Shuzenji Kyotaro... it suits you.
**[08:55] shu**
Huh? What does?
**[08:58] ata**
I'm saying it suits your laziness.
**[09:01] shu**
Yeah, I agree!
**[09:05] waka**
If they're here, that seems to suggest...
**[09:08] waka**
The cause of all this...
**[09:09] kiri**
Yeah, it's that thing, right?
**[09:12] kiri**
A m... m... mo... What was it again?
**[09:16] dogo**
Ryoma-senpai, what's wrong with your memory?
**[09:20] dogo**
You know what it is. A... m...
m... m... What was it again?
**[09:27] man**
Not you, too!
**[09:28] man**
It's the usual thing! A m... m... m...
**[09:34] shu**
Meat curry.
**[09:36] waku**
Meat curry? Was that what
we were talking about?
**[09:40] waku**
I think I'd like to eat some meat curry.
**[09:42] waku**
I think I had some meat curry this morning.
**[09:44] man**
Now that you mention it,
I think you did, Ichiro.
**[09:50] mon**
Go on, keep aging!
**[09:55] dogo**
I feel kind of tired...
**[10:00] man**
You're a total old man!
**[10:03] dogo**
What's that?
**[10:05] man**
You've become even more of an old man!
**[10:10] dogo**
What's that?
**[10:13] dogo**
You've! Become! An old man!
**[10:17] dogo**
Oh, shucks, have I?
**[10:19] man**
It wasn't a compliment!
**[10:21] kiri**
This is terrible! We just
keep on getting older.
**[10:25] shu**
What's the big deal?
It's not that different from how we were.
**[10:30] kiri**
But it is different!
**[10:32] waku**
But Kyotaro-kun's way of speaking
hasn't changed much, I'll admit...
**[10:37] kiri**
I can't believe it.
**[10:38] waku**
Maybe because he was the most
like an old man from the start?
**[10:43] kiri**
For better or worse... I'm not sure which.
**[10:45] dogo**
Kyotaro-senpai...
**[10:48] dogo**
You've changed so much!
**[10:50] shu**
Chiro, that's a tree.
**[10:53] man**
Honestly.
**[10:54] man**
You've always been a fool,
**[10:56] man**
but you've gotten even worse
in your old age, Ichiro.
**[10:59] shu**
Tai-Tai, that's a stairway.
**[11:03] mon**
Well? You can't fight back in
bodies like those, can you?
**[11:07] waku**
I see something...
but it's too far away to make out.
**[11:11] waku**
It looks a bit like a head.
**[11:15] man**
That's my head.
**[11:19] kar**
He's currently in the depths
of anger and suffering!
**[11:23] kar**
We need to make him happy!
**[11:27] waku**
That's right. What's causing this again?
**[11:30] kiri**
You know, the m... m... thing.
**[11:34] dogo**
The thing, you know. The... m... m...
**[11:38] man**
The usual thing. The m... m...
What was it again?
**[11:44] shu**
Meat curry.
**[11:46] kiri**
Of course! Meat curry!
**[11:48] wak**
Is that what we were talking about?
**[11:51] dogo**
That reminds me,
I had meat curry this morning!
**[11:55] man**
That's right. I think you did, Ichiro.
**[11:59] shu**
Everyone, you're repeating
the same things as before.
**[12:03] kiri**
The same things?
**[12:04] kiri**
That's right... we were talking about
how you haven't changed much, Kyotaro.
**[12:10] shu**
Yeah, we've been through that, too.
**[12:12] kiri**
Is it possible... you haven't changed
because you were an old man already?
**[12:17] shu**
Nanao-san, you said all that before, too.
**[12:21] dogo**
Kyotaro-senpai, you've gotten so hard...
**[12:25] shu**
Chiro, that's a wall.
**[12:27] man**
I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
**[12:30] shu**
Tai-Tai, that's a stairway.
**[12:34] shu**
What a pain...
**[12:38] kar**
What's he doing?
**[12:41] kiri**
I don't wanna get any older!
**[12:41] shi**
Second childhood, I think.
**[12:44] kar**
What about him, then?
**[12:46] man**
I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
**[12:50] shu**
Bragging about his old days as a bad boy.
**[12:53] kar**
And what's with him?
**[12:55] dogo**
Kyotaro-senpai...
**[12:57] dogo**
You've gotten so round...
**[12:59] shu**
Suffering the vision loss
that comes with age, I think.
**[13:03] waku**
I get such a chill at this time of year!
**[13:06] waku**
I always keep Chinese medicine
on hand for my aching joints.
**[13:12] karu**
And him?
**[13:12] shu**
Boasting about his health conditions.
It's common in seniors.
**[13:16] kar**
Aging is pretty rough on you humans, I guess.
**[13:19] una**
It's a little hard to watch, really...
**[13:22] mar**
Can we put a stop to this?
**[13:23] mar**
They're so ugly it's making
my adorable eyes ache.
**[13:26] ata**
Shut up for a minute.
**[13:30] ata**
Why isn't he suffering?
**[13:32] ata**
Shuzenji Kyotaro...
**[13:34] ata**
You need... to suffer!
***SIGN*** Furanui Born March 26 Blood Type: O? Aries Hobbies: Collecting insects Likes: Strawberries, digging
**[13:45] dogo**
I feel kinda tired...
**[13:48] man**
You're a total old man!
**[13:51] dogo**
Eh? What was that?
**[13:52] man**
You're! An! Old man!
**[13:56] dogo**
Oh, shucks, am I?
**[13:57] man**
It wasn't a compliment!
**[13:59] kiri**
This is awful!
**[14:01] kiri**
We just keep aging!
**[14:05] waku**
The season's so chilly, isn't it?
**[14:11] dogo**
Kyotaro-senpai, you've gotten so square!
**[14:15] man**
I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
**[14:19] kiri**
No! No! I don't wanna get any older!
**[14:24] mon**
Notice me already, darn it!
**[14:27] mon**
It's me!
**[14:29] mon**
I'm the one who made you age!
**[14:31] mon**
Fight me already!
**[14:35] kar**
We're not getting anywhere like this.
**[14:37] kar**
I guess you'd better transform.
**[14:40] kar**
As Prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
**[14:43] kar**
Become Karls Knights Happy Kiss
and save the people!
**[14:53] kar**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[15:04] kar**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[15:08] kar**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[15:12] kar**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[15:16] kar**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[15:20] kar**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[15:24] kar**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[15:27] kar**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[15:30] kar**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[15:33] kar**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[15:37] kar**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[15:40] kar**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[15:45] kar**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[15:51] kiri**
We transformed?
**[15:53] waku**
So we can transform in this state, too...
**[15:56] dogo**
I guess we just have to
beat the monster, then.
**[16:00] man**
Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
**[16:03] mon**
What are they actually saying?
**[16:07] shu**
They've got kind of a
"let's beat him already" vibe going.
**[16:12] mon**
So they finally want to fight!
**[16:15] mon**
Now, feel my wrath!
**[16:22] kiri**
Huh?
**[16:23] waku**
No change at all.
**[16:25] dogo**
I guess we just gotta beat the monster!
**[16:28] man**
Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
**[16:31] shu**
Sounds like they're feeling pretty okay.
**[16:37] mon**
I see! My attacks don't work
because they're already old!
**[16:41] shira**
He's so useless...
**[16:49] mon**
Well?
**[16:51] mon**
Being old feels awful, doesn't it?
**[16:54] kiri**
It does.
**[16:55] kiri**
It doesn't feel good at all.
**[16:57] kiri**
We gotta beat the monster as soon as we can!
**[17:01] man**
Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
**[17:04] shu**
They're kind of saying, "Are you so sure?"
**[17:07] mon**
I don't think that's what
they were saying at all!
**[17:10] shu**
But are you so sure?
**[17:12] shu**
I don't mind being an old
man at all, personally...
**[17:15] mon**
You couldn't understand...
**[17:18] mon**
I'm in high school, but I have
a face like an old man...
**[17:22] mon**
so everybody just calls me "Old Man"!
You couldn't possibly understand my pain!
**[17:26] mon**
So...
**[17:27] mon**
I'm making everyone older than me,
**[17:29] mon**
so they can get a taste of how I feel!
**[17:33] shu**
Personally, I couldn't
wait to become an old man.
**[17:39] shu**
I wanted to get accustomed to things like
basking in the sun as soon as possible.
**[17:44] shu**
There are lots of things that don't look
"right" on you until you get older.
**[17:49] shu**
I'm already used to those
things, so it's fine.
**[17:53] kar**
Now, everyone!
**[17:55] kar**
Kyotaro, hurry!
**[17:57] kar**
Kyotaro-kun, it's time!
**[18:00] kar**
Kyotaro-senpai, hurry!
**[18:02] kar**
Please hurry!
**[18:05] kar**
Darn it...
**[18:08] kar**
Now! Use your powers
combined to make him happy!
**[18:11] kar**
Are you happy?
**[18:13] kar**
Yes!
**[18:15] kar**
Are you happy?
**[18:17] kar**
Yes!
**[18:18] kar**
Are you happy?
**[18:20] kar**
Yes!
**[18:21] kar**
Are you happy?
**[18:23] kar**
Yes!
**[18:25] kar**
Are you happy?
**[18:27] kar**
Yes!
**[18:28] kar**
Let's happy hour!
**[18:31] kar**
Return to happiness!
**[18:34] kar**
Happy...
**[18:52] kar**
...and Turn!
**[19:00] mon**
Oh, it came out. It's all out.
**[19:07] shu**
Happy End.
**[19:09] kar**
Happy Powder!
**[19:15] kiri**
Hey, we're back!
**[19:16] dogo**
We are!
**[19:17] dogo**
Does that mean we have to go to class?
**[19:20] dogo**
You'd really rather go
back to being that way?
**[19:24] waku**
Either way, it's a little
too soon for us to be old.
**[19:28] shu**
Oh? Who are you again?
**[19:31] kiri**
That's Ojii Santa from our class, remember?
**[19:34] shu**
Oh, "Old Man."
***SIGN*** Ojii Santa
**[19:37] oji**
I see. Being an old man means
I'm ahead of the curve.
**[19:42] oji**
I guess I have some things others don't.
**[19:45] oji**
Thanks.
**[19:47] oji**
Old man, old man...
**[19:50] shu**
Lucky. I wanted to be able
to space out all day.
**[19:54] kiri**
You'll get there. Don't worry.
**[19:56] waku**
But you can rest easy.
**[19:58] waku**
It sounds like Ryoma-kun will
take care of you forever.
**[20:01] kiri**
I didn't say that!
**[20:03] shu**
Well, we worked up a sweat,
so let's take a bath.
**[20:12] una**
W-Well, nothing to be done about it.
**[20:14] una**
Let's just try again next time.
**[20:16] masa**
T-That's right!
**[20:18] masa**
We can make as many monsters as we want.
**[20:21] una**
Ata...
**[20:23] shu**
So tired. I really want that bath...
**[20:26] shu**
Oh, that's right.
**[20:32] shu**
Ata!
**[20:34] shu**
Why don't you come to the bath with us?
**[20:37] ata**
Damn you...
**[20:40] ata**
Why... are you saying that... after all this?
**[20:45] shu**
What? What's wrong?
**[20:50] ata**
*Kyo-chan!*
**[20:55] ata**
You really are...
**[20:58] ata**
This is what you always do... Always...
**[21:02] ata**
You just drift through life,
doing what you feel like...
**[21:05] ata**
Doing whatever you want...
**[21:07] ata**
You never even think about
how anyone else feels!
**[21:13] ata**
You're just going to throw that out there?
"Come to the bath"?
**[21:16] ata**
Like I'm an afterthought?
It's so inconsiderate!
**[21:22] una**
Ata...
**[21:23] fura**
I understand your dissatisfaction and anger.
**[21:27] fura**
Spread fear! Rise, Black Knight!
**[21:36] una**
It can't be!
**[21:44] una**
Ata?
**[21:45] una**
Ibusuki-senpai?
**[21:53] shu**
Oh? Ata?
**[21:57] shu**
Ata-kun... became a monster?
**[22:04] waku**
He's putting out a dangerous aura...
**[22:07] karu**
This isn't good!
**[22:09] karu**
He's putting out incredibly unhappy energy!
***SIGN*** One Centimeter to HAPPY
***SIGN*** Next Episode
**[23:54] sign**
Next time: Let's happy kiss
our way to One Centimeter to HAPPY!
***SIGN*** Wow, Ata-san, you're so mad. Seriously, what happened in your past?
***SIGN*** Time for the classic Defense Club second-to-last-episode chaos! Will production get it out in time?! (That's what you meant?!)
# 11 - One Centimeter to HAPPY
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:09] ---**
So tired. I really want that bath...
**[00:12] ---**
Oh, that's right.
**[00:17] ---**
Ata!
**[00:19] ---**
Why don't you come to the bath with us?
**[00:23] ---**
Damn you...
**[00:25] ---**
Why... are you saying that... after all this?
**[00:30] ---**
What? What's wrong?
**[00:34] ---**
You're just going to throw that out there?
"Come to the bath"?
**[00:37] ---**
Like I'm an afterthought?
It's so inconsiderate!
**[00:40] ---**
I understand your dissatisfaction and anger.
**[00:44] ---**
Spread fear! Rise, Black Knight!
**[00:53] ---**
It can't be!
**[01:12] ---**
This isn't good!
**[01:14] ---**
He's putting out incredibly unhappy energy!
***SIGN*** One Centimeter to HAPPY
**[03:07] kiri**
Ata-kun?
**[03:08] waku**
He's become a monster?
**[03:09] man**
It appears so...
**[03:11] dogo**
This is so bad!
**[03:13] shu**
Hey, hey. You're kidding, right?
**[03:22] shira**
I don't... think it's a joke.
**[03:25] una**
You turned Ata into a monster?!
**[03:30] fura**
To rule this world requires fear.
**[03:33] fura**
Fear and suffering are the most effective
**[03:36] fura**
and efficient ways to control humans.
**[03:39] fura**
Ritter Diamant has sublimated his own
suffering and become fear itself.
**[03:46] fura**
So that I, Furanui,
may control the human world!
**[03:50] fura**
Shall I turn you to fear, too?
**[03:52] fura**
Ritter Amethyst...
**[03:54] fura**
the warped hatred behind
that pretty face of yours.
**[03:58] fura**
Ritter Rosenquarz...
**[03:59] fura**
the despair hidden behind your smile
that comes from not being understood?
**[04:03] una**
How do you know about that?
**[04:05] fura**
And I, as ruler of the human world,
shall become Honyala Land's king!
**[04:10] kar**
You're wrong, Furanui!
**[04:12] kar**
You can bind people with fear,
but that's not real leadership!
**[04:16] kar**
Not unless they're happy!
**[04:18] kar**
Countries are founded
on the happiness of their people!
**[04:21] kar**
Happiness is indispensable
to ruling the human world!
**[04:25] fura**
Silence! Happiness is the
opiate of the masses!
**[04:29] fura**
Go, Ritter Diamant! Spread fear!
**[04:34] ata**
Shuzenji Kyotaro... I will make you pay!
**[04:38] shu**
Me?
**[04:42] shu**
Stop it, Ata.
**[04:44] shu**
What's going on here?
**[04:46] kiri**
Wait... has Ata-kun been mad
about that this whole time?
**[04:49] shu**
Hey, Ata. Did I do something to you?
**[04:52] ata**
Shut up!
**[04:54] kiri**
Look out!
**[04:56] ata**
Don't get in my way, Kirishima!
**[04:59] fura**
Yes, get him!
**[05:01] fura**
Edelstein, hit them with all of your
**[05:04] fura**
deep-seated sorrows and resentments!
**[05:08] una**
Could you not order us around?
**[05:10] hone**
Yeah, taking orders is the
least cute thing there is.
**[05:15] una**
We're doing this of our own free will.
**[05:26] waku**
He's in a rather pissy mood, isn't he?
**[05:27] man**
This is no time for flippancy!
**[05:32] una**
Stay away from Ata...
**[05:33] una**
...or we'll stop you ourselves!
**[05:35] man**
You wanna fight? Bring it on!
**[05:40] una**
Well, if it isn't the former delinquent,
Manza Taishi-kun.
**[05:45] man**
How do you know about that?
**[05:46] una**
Everyone knows it.
**[05:48] una**
Maybe you belong with us, not them?
**[05:52] man**
Shut up!
**[05:54] dogo**
Taishi!
**[05:55] shira**
Not so fast.
**[05:57] shira**
You'll have to beat me first!
**[05:59] dogo**
Don't get in my way, Magozaemon!
**[06:03] dogo**
Shoot, I shouldn't have said that...
**[06:05] dogo**
Sorry, sorry.
**[06:06] shira**
You get the heck away from me!
**[06:11] shira**
Idiot! This is why you never cross me!
**[06:14] man**
Hey, you! Don't fight your own cousin!
**[06:18] shira**
M-My perfect hair!
**[06:23] waku**
I don't think I understand what this fight
is all about, Ritter Rosenquarz-san.
**[06:29] una**
Yes. I guess it's just time to fight,
Luna Kiss-san.
**[06:36] kiri**
Kyotaro, what are you doing?
**[06:38] shu**
I'm tired.
**[06:39] kiri**
Kyotaro!
**[06:44] ata**
Shuzenji Kyotaro. Why won't you fight?
**[06:47] shu**
Because it's annoying.
**[06:50] ata**
Annoying?
**[06:53] shu**
And I'm sleepy.
**[06:57] shu**
And I don't want to fight you.
**[07:00] shu**
We have no reason to fight.
**[07:02] kiri**
Wait, Kyotaro!
**[07:07] ata**
No reason, you say?
**[07:12] una**
Ata?
**[07:13] una**
Ibusuki-senpai?
**[07:15] kiri**
Ata-kun?
**[07:17] ata**
You still don't understand?!
**[07:31] kar**
Everyone!
**[07:32] kar**
Wake up, everyone!
**[07:34] kar**
This isn't happy at all!
**[07:38] fura**
What's wrong, Karls? Is that all
your "happy" power has to offer?
**[07:44] fura**
It seems that fear truly
is the stronger force!
**[07:49] kiri**
Not yet!
**[07:51] kiri**
We haven't lost yet!
**[07:53] waku**
That's right!
**[07:54] man**
The idea that fear wins over happiness...
**[07:57] dogo**
...we won't support it!
**[08:00] kar**
Guys...
**[08:04] shu**
What a nice nap.
**[08:06] shu**
We won't lose.
**[08:08] shu**
Because we believe in Karls,
and the power of happiness.
**[08:11] kar**
Guys!
**[08:13] kar**
Furanui! We'll stand up again and again!
**[08:17] kar**
Because we believe in the power of happiness!
**[08:21] kar**
We'll transform as
many times as we need to!
**[08:23] kar**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss...
my magic knights of happiness!
**[08:27] kar**
Come on!
**[08:38] kar**
Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
**[09:15] kar**
Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
**[09:29] kar**
Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
**[09:42] kar**
Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
**[09:55] kar**
Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
**[10:08] kar**
Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
**[10:13] kar**
Like the flowers that
bloom across the world...
**[10:16] kar**
Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
**[10:18] kar**
Like the moon that illuminates
everything below...
**[10:21] kar**
Like the snow that gently
embraces the land...
**[10:23] kar**
Let's bring happiness to the universe!
**[10:26] kar**
We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
**[10:29] kar**
Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
**[10:34] kar**
Knights contract complete!
**[10:36] kar**
Now! Use your powers
combined to make him happy!
**[10:40] kar**
Are you happy?
**[10:41] kar**
Yes!
**[10:41] kar**
Are you happy?
**[10:42] kar**
Yes!
**[10:43] kar**
Are you happy?
**[10:44] kar**
Yes!
**[10:44] kar**
Are you happy?
**[10:45] kar**
Yes!
**[10:46] kar**
Are you happy?
**[10:47] kar**
Yes!
**[10:48] kar**
Let's happy hour!
**[10:51] kar**
Happy and Set!
**[11:04] kar**
Return to happiness!
**[11:07] kar**
Happy and Turn!
**[11:15] ata**
You can't make people happy with magic!
**[11:27] kar**
No...
**[11:34] ata**
No reason? You still don't get it, do you?
**[11:39] shu**
Yeah...
**[11:40] ata**
You're always mocking me like this...
**[11:43] ata**
And you're always cruising through life,
never putting in any effort...
**[11:48] ata**
It has happened time and time and time again!
***SIGN*** Binan
Elementary
School
***SIGN*** (Bronze) Hayashi Masaki (Bronze) Yamanaka Kazuki (Silver) Ibusuki Ata (Gold) Shuzenji Kyotaro
**[12:08] (Flashback) kid**
Shuzenji's amazing, huh?
**[12:09] (Flashback) kid**
Yeah, he's so great.
**[12:11] (Flashback) kiri**
Aw... I worked hard on mine,
but Kyotaro got the gold again.
**[12:18] (Flashback) kyo**
I think Ata's is way better
than mine, though...
**[12:33] (Flashback) kiri**
Sheesh, Kyotaro.
**[12:35] (Flashback) kiri**
I only just managed to clear five blocks.
**[12:58] (Flashback) kids**
Congratulations! Amazing!
**[13:03] (Flashback) shu**
Huh? I jumped it!
**[13:11] (Flashback) kids**
Wow! Cool!
**[13:12] (Flashback) kiri**
Wow, a new trick! You're so cool, Kyotaro!
**[13:28] ibu**
That time and that time and that time...
**[13:31] ibu**
Everything I worked hard to achieve...
**[13:33] ibu**
Every time, every time, every time...
**[13:36] ibu**
Again and again and again...
**[13:42] kar**
He's been caught up in a maelstrom of hatred!
**[13:46] kar**
I've never seen such a twisted, unhappy aura!
**[13:50] dogo**
Just over that stuff?
**[13:52] man**
He's just venting every offense
he's kept locked up inside this whole time.
**[13:57] waku**
It just shows how powerful his feelings are.
**[14:01] waku**
Or his obsession, you could say...
**[14:05] waku**
Or...
**[14:06] ata**
And then...
**[14:08] ata**
That time, too!
**[14:13] kiri**
You know, Kyotaro. *That* time.
**[14:16] shu**
That time? What time?
**[14:18] kiri**
That day after we were playing in the mud.
**[14:22] kiri**
Remember?
**[14:24] ata**
Did that really mean so little to you?
**[14:26] ata**
That time...
**[14:29] (Flashback) ata**
This is fun!
**[14:35] (Flashback) kiri**
Look, I'm so dirty!
**[14:37] (Flashback) shu**
Ata, you're the dirtiest!
**[14:40] (Flashback) ata**
You are, Kyo-chan!
**[14:42] (Flashback) kiri**
But our moms'll be mad
if we come back all dirty.
**[14:50] (Flashback) yu**
Hey, kids! You're looking pretty muddy there!
**[14:53] (Flashback) yu**
Why not come by our bath to wash off?
**[14:57] (Flashback) yu**
My bro always says kids gotta get muddy.
**[15:00] (Flashback) yu**
Muddy kids forever!
**[15:02] (Flashback) yu**
Yeah, yeah!
**[15:05] (Flashback) shu**
Yeah! Let's go to the bath!
**[15:07] (Flashback) kiri**
Okay!
**[15:10] (Flashback) ata**
I'm coming too!
**[15:14] ---**
Undress and let's get in there!
**[15:16] ---**
Bath time!
**[15:17] (Flashback) ata**
Um, I've never done this before...
**[15:17] kiri**
My mom would have been so mad...
**[15:20] (Flashback) ata**
So...
**[15:20] kyo**
We almost finished that castle, too!
**[15:33] ata**
You... You...
**[15:35] ata**
You left me behind!
**[15:43] dogo**
Is it really that big a deal?
**[15:45] shira**
Shut up!
**[15:47] ata**
I really wanted you to realize it.
**[15:51] ata**
But you didn't just fail realize...
**[15:53] ata**
You kept rubbing it in my face!
**[15:57] ata**
Shuzenji Kyotaro.
**[15:59] ata**
I am going to surpass you!
**[16:02] ata**
Take this!
**[16:06] kiri**
Kyotaro!
**[16:08] dogo**
Why?
**[16:20] ata**
Why? Why won't you fight back?
**[16:25] ata**
Are you going to ignore me
the way you always do?
**[16:49] ata**
Why? Why can't I make you respond?
**[16:51] kiri**
Ata-kun! You've got the wrong idea!
**[16:54] ata**
Why?!
**[16:56] shu**
I just wanted to bear the brunt
**[17:00] shu**
of your feelings as best I could.
**[17:05] shu**
Because that's all I can do at this point.
**[17:12] shu**
But... I did search for you then.
**[17:21] (Flashback) kiri**
What nice hot water!
**[17:23] (Flashback) shu**
Ata! I'll wash your back!
**[17:29] (Flashback) shu**
Ata?
**[17:31] (Flashback) shu**
Ata?
**[17:33] (Flashback) shu**
Ata?
**[17:34] (Flashback) kiri**
Where are you?
***SIGN*** Binan Elementary School
**[17:41] (Flashback) shu**
Ata!
**[17:43] (Flashback) shu**
Ata-kun!
**[17:44] (Flashback) shu**
Where'd you go yesterday?
You just disappeared...
**[17:47] (Flashback) shu**
We were looking for you.
**[17:51] (Flashback) ata**
Forget it.
**[17:57] (Flashback) kiri**
Ata-kun!
**[17:59] (Flashback) shu**
What's wrong with Ata?
**[18:04] shu**
I should have asked earlier,
but what did you do after the bath?
**[18:08] ata**
I spent the day alone,
**[18:13] ata**
crying in the park.
**[18:16] ata**
Back then, I wanted you to say it...
**[18:20] ata**
"Ata, come to the bath with us."
**[18:22] ata**
All this time, I wanted that... and yet...
**[18:27] ata**
Instead, at the worst possible time...
**[18:30] (Flashback) ata**
Oh, that's right.
**[18:35] (Flashback) ata**
Ata!
**[18:37] (Flashback) ata**
Why don't you come to the bath with us?
**[18:40] ata**
Those words I've wanted
to hear for over ten years...
**[18:45] ata**
This is how you do it, every single time...
**[18:48] ata**
The way you trample on my feelings!
**[18:54] kiri**
Kyotaro!
**[18:55] una**
That dark aura is definitely bad!
**[18:58] shira**
Oh my god!
**[18:59] fura**
I never thought his hatred
would be so intense...
**[19:06] dogo**
So bad, so bad, so bad!
**[19:07] man**
We have to stop him!
**[19:08] waku**
It appears we do...
**[19:10] karu**
Then let's all...
**[19:11] kiri**
Kyotaro!
**[19:18] shu**
Then...
**[19:20] shu**
It might be ten years too late, but...
**[19:23] shu**
Ata. Let's go together...
**[19:33] shu**
to the bath.
**[19:37] (Flashback) shu**
Ata, let's go to the bath together.
**[19:56] shu**
Sorry, Ata.
**[20:13] shu**
What?
**[20:14] shu**
A magic circle?
**[20:18] bird**
Message for you!
**[20:21] kar**
An emergency message from Honyala Land?
**[20:24] fura**
What?
**[20:26] bird**
It's from King Papa Kamo!
**[20:28] bird**
Click!
**[20:32] king**
*Help me, Karls! Furanui!*
**[20:35] king**
*Honyala Land is in danger!*
**[20:37] king**
*Come back at once!*
**[20:42] bird**
Thank you very much.
**[20:47] kar**
Papa Kamo...
**[20:48] kiri**
You mean, that was your father?
**[20:52] fura**
What has happened to Father?
**[20:54] una**
Sounded like mortal danger of some kind.
**[20:57] una**
Yeah...
**[20:57] fura**
What?!
**[20:59] kar**
Papa Kamo is... Papa Kamo is...
**[21:06] dogo**
He's wailing...
**[21:08] man**
Karls, who's usually so happy...
**[21:14] shu**
Karls.
**[21:17] shu**
It's really weird when you aren't happy.
**[21:21] shu**
You've brought happiness to a
lot of sad and miserable people.
**[21:30] shu**
Weren't you always the one who
could stay happy no matter what?
**[21:35] shu**
Aren't you the one who wanted
to make the whole world happy?
**[21:40] kar**
That's right!
**[21:41] kar**
If Honyala Land isn't happy,
we need to go and make it happy!
**[21:46] kiri**
That's the way, Karls!
**[21:47] kiri**
Yeah, yeah, yeah! That's right.
**[21:49] waku**
Looks like Kyotaro-kun
talked him into that one.
**[21:53] man**
Yeah...
**[21:54] kar**
As prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
**[21:57] kar**
Karls Knights, save Papa Kamo
and all of Honyala Land!
**[22:02] ---**
Right!
**[22:04] ---**
Let's go!
**[22:08] fura**
I shall be the one to save Father!
**[22:11] fura**
Come along, Edelstein!
**[22:14] una**
Ata?
**[22:15] una**
Ibusuki-senpai?
***SIGN*** Next Episode
***SIGN*** Always HAPPY in the Heart!
**[23:54] una**
Let's happy kiss our way to
Always HAPPY in the Heart!
***SIGN***
***SIGN*** What will become of Honyala Land's happiness? And how will it all end?
# 12 - Always HAPPY in the Heart!
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRZX20P8Y/cute-high-earth-defense-club-love)
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:15] ---**
What?
**[00:21] ---**
*Honyala Land is in danger!*
**[00:24] ---**
*Come back at once!*
**[00:28] ---**
As prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
**[00:31] ---**
Karls Knights, save Papa Kamo
and all of Honyala Land!
**[00:36] ---**
Right!
**[00:37] ---**
Let's go!
**[00:42] ---**
I shall be the one to save Father!
**[00:44] ---**
Come along, Edelstein!
**[00:47] ---**
Ata?
**[00:48] ---**
Ibusuki-senpai?
**[00:56] una**
Ata.
**[00:59] una**
I've seen how hard you've been working.
**[01:04] una**
I want you to be happy, Ata.
**[01:10] shira**
Yeah!
**[01:11] una**
Well, it's not easy to put this into words...
**[01:14] una**
So, I'm not a fan of violence, but...
**[01:17] una**
Bing!
**[01:22] una**
Okay, let's go too!
**[01:24] shira**
Okay!
***SIGN*** Honyala Land is under attack! What's happened to Papa Kamo?
***SIGN*** Will Ata and Kyotaro get their handshake? Will the world be filled with happiness?
***SIGN*** Always HAPPY in the Heart!
**[01:49] kar**
This way, everyone!
**[01:53] dogo**
Wow, wow, wow!
**[01:55] dogo**
This is his magical kingdom?
**[01:56] dogo**
Honyala Land?
**[01:57] dogo**
It really exists?
**[01:58] dogo**
You thought he was making it up?
**[02:00] dogo**
Well...
**[02:01] kar**
Anyway, let's hurry to Papa Kamo's palace!
**[02:05] shu**
Sure.
**[02:09] dogo**
Ouch, ouch, ouch!
**[02:11] man**
What is all this?
**[02:12] man**
Ichiro!
**[02:18] kar**
Pa-para-pa!
**[02:26] kar**
What are those things?
**[02:30] kiri**
Tin soldiers?
**[02:32] shu**
Karls, what are those?
**[02:34] kar**
I don't know. I've never seen them before.
**[02:39] dogo**
They're coming from this way, too!
**[02:40] waku**
This way, too.
**[02:41] man**
We're surrounded...
**[02:50] man**
What is it?
**[02:58] dogo**
These guys want to hurt us!
**[03:00] man**
That was quite clear!
**[03:09] waku**
More of this?
**[03:12] man**
It's not stopping!
**[03:13] shu**
Karls!
**[03:14] kar**
I'll use my magic again...
**[03:20] fura**
Prince Karls! Let's call
a ceasefire for now.
**[03:24] kar**
Furanui!
**[03:25] shu**
Ata...
**[03:26] fura**
What's going on here?
**[03:28] fura**
Where are Honyala Land's people?
**[03:31] kar**
None of this makes any sense...
**[03:33] shu**
Ata... are you sure?
**[03:35] ibu**
I may have lost, but I have my
pride as a member of the Edelstein.
**[03:39] una**
You know... We still have our knights'
contract and all that, too...
**[03:43] shira**
Right.
**[03:45] shu**
I see.
**[03:45] men**
Prince Karls! Prince Furanui!
**[03:50] waku**
There are people over there.
**[03:53] kar**
Are you guys okay?
**[03:54] dogo**
So all the residents of Honyala Land...
**[03:56] kiri**
...really are all animals.
**[03:58] man**
But there appears to be
a bit too much variety...
**[04:00] waku**
Let's just not think about it too hard.
**[04:03] kar**
What happened, everyone?
**[04:06] pure**
Minister Wao staged a coup d'etat!
**[04:09] fura**
What? Minister Wao?
**[04:11] shu**
Who's Minister Wao?
**[04:12] kar**
He's our uncle!
**[04:15] (Flashback) wao**
I, Wao, shall carry out my duties faithfully.
**[04:19] fura**
Wao was our educator, as well.
**[04:22] fura**
Why would such a wise man do this?
**[04:24] kar**
And where have the people
of Honyala Land gone?
**[04:28] pure**
W-Well...
**[04:32] shu**
What's that?
**[04:39] kar**
A demon?
**[04:40] kar**
Kyotaro!
**[04:41] kar**
Look!
**[04:46] kar**
The people...
**[04:47] kar**
So that's how it works.
**[04:56] una**
If that beam hits you,
I guess it turns you into a tin soldier.
**[05:00] shira**
That was close...
**[05:01] kar**
Furanui, I'm putting up a barrier!
**[05:03] kar**
Help me out!
**[05:05] fura**
Agreed!
**[05:07] both**
Hai-hai-sir!
**[05:12] dogo**
They got it!
**[05:13] kiri**
Nice job, Karls!
**[05:15] ibu**
No, they only blocked the shot...
**[05:41] kar**
Come out, Minister Wao!
**[05:43] fura**
We know you're in there!
**[05:52] kamo**
Karls! Furanui!
**[05:54] kamo**
I was hoping you could save me!
**[05:57] wao**
I see you've both returned.
**[06:03] shu**
That's Minister Wao?
**[06:05] kamo**
Karls... Furanui...
**[06:07] kamo**
Wao may be engaging in a
rather terrible scheme...
**[06:10] wao**
Silence!
**[06:11] kamo**
I think that hurts, maybe!
**[06:14] kar**
Papa Kamo!
**[06:15] fura**
Father!
**[06:15] fura**
Minister Wao! How could you do this?
**[06:18] kar**
It's awful! Just awful!
**[06:19] wao**
It's all the fault of this foolish,
incompetent King Papa Kamo.
**[06:23] karu**
Just what has Papa Kamo done?
**[06:25] wao**
Nothing, and that's the problem!
**[06:27] kar**
What?
**[06:29] wao**
Drunk on peace, he lets the
people do whatever they want,
**[06:32] wao**
neglecting all of his
responsibilities as king.
**[06:36] kar**
That's not true! Everyone
loves Papa Kamo's kindness!
**[06:40] fura**
Honyala Land was a peaceful nation.
**[06:44] wao**
Fool! Don't you realize that
peace leads to depravity?
**[06:50] kar**
But, but... I thought everyone
in Honyala Land was happy.
**[06:55] wao**
Listen to me, princes and
airhead manservants...
**[06:59] dogo**
Don't call us airheads!
**[07:00] waku**
I object to "manservant", as well.
**[07:02] man**
You wanna step outside, huh?!
**[07:03] kiri**
We're just trying to make everyone happy!
**[07:07] wao**
That is the very foolishness
I'm talking about!
**[07:10] kar**
Why? Why is it wrong if everyone's happy?
**[07:14] wao**
Just as peace births depravity...
**[07:16] wao**
when someone shines with a happy aura,
they projects a shadow behind them.
**[07:20] wao**
This is the law of the world.
**[07:23] fura**
I can't claim that I don't understand.
**[07:26] ata**
Yes.
**[07:28] wao**
I have served the airheaded, incompetent
Papa Kamo for a very long time.
**[07:39] (Flashback) kamo**
I may be happy!
**[07:40] (Flashback) kar**
Feels nice, huh? I'm so happy!
**[07:43] (Flashback) kamo**
C'mon, Furanui! Minister Wao!
**[07:45] (Flashback) kamo**
You might want to bathe in
the sun with us, perhaps!
**[07:48] (Flashback) wao**
I fear that if bandits attacked
while I was sunbathing,
**[07:53] (Flashback) wao**
I would be unable to protect you.
**[07:55] (Flashback) fura**
I agree with Minister Wao.
**[07:58] (Flashback) kar**
Then why don't we take turns?
**[08:01] (Flashback) kar**
While you two sunbathe, we'll keep watch!
**[08:04] (Flashback) kamo**
That might just be a good idea!
**[08:07] (Flashback) kamo**
Karls, sometimes I think
you might have great ideas!
**[08:10] (Flashback) kamo**
Huggle, huggle!
**[08:12] (Flashback) kamo**
Huggle, huggle!
**[08:13] (Flashback) kamo**
Huggle, huggle!
**[08:17] wao**
And that's when I realized...
**[08:19] wao**
Furanui, you are the same as I am.
**[08:23] wao**
Though born to different mothers,
Papa Kamo and I were both in line for the throne.
**[08:28] wao**
However, my perfectionism lost
to Papa Kamo's imperfectionism.
**[08:34] wao**
Is it not an insult to be put in
competition with that fool Karls?
**[08:41] wao**
Prince Furanui...
**[08:42] wao**
I think you belong with me!
**[08:48] kar**
Furanui!
**[08:49] wao**
Prince Furanui.
**[08:51] wao**
I'm sure you wanted to enjoy the
sun with your father and brother.
**[08:56] wao**
But when you showed restraint,
**[08:58] wao**
your father lavished praise on
your airhead brother instead.
**[09:03] wao**
You must have found it terribly sad.
**[09:06] ---**
Surely you asked yourself:
Why am I not praised?
**[09:08] ---**
Why am I not loved?
**[09:12] ---**
And you then began to hate your brother.
**[09:18] ---**
Your love turned to hatred.
**[09:22] fura**
Love...
**[09:23] fura**
Turned to hatred?
**[09:25] wao**
Prince Furanui, if you join me now,
**[09:28] wao**
I will make you next in
the line of succession.
**[09:31] karu**
Furanui!
**[09:33] karu**
You won't abandon Papa Kamo, will you?
**[09:35] karu**
He's our papa, you know?
**[09:39] wao**
Listen, Furanui...
**[09:40] wao**
The king's love has always been exclusively
bestowed upon the airhead Karls.
**[09:45] wao**
There's no place for you
with the two of them!
**[09:51] (Flashback) both**
Whee!
**[09:53] fura**
It's true...
**[09:54] fura**
There was no place for me there.
**[09:57] ata**
I know how you feel.
**[10:01] ibu**
But even if you have no place, do
you truly hate Karls and Papa Kamo?
**[10:09] ata**
I'm sure you felt annoyed
about how they acted happy
**[10:11] ata**
and never noticed you.
**[10:15] ata**
You probably felt lonely, too.
**[10:19] ata**
But is that the same as truly hating someone?
**[10:23] ata**
Isn't it a hatred that indicates love?
**[10:26] fura**
True. You may be right...
**[10:30] fura**
But what of it?
**[10:32] fura**
It doesn't change the fact that the king
showered all his love on Karls instead of me!
**[10:38] shu**
But Karls didn't treat you that way, did he?
**[10:41] shu**
Karls never said anything bad about you, ever.
**[10:47] shu**
And if you went with that guy,
Karls would probably cry for real.
**[10:52] shu**
He'd be really sad.
**[10:54] kar**
Yeah! Because I love you, Furanui!
**[10:59] shu**
You may feel like you're alone,
but I don't think you really are.
**[11:05] ata**
Furanui!
**[11:06] ata**
Have you ever made the decision to join him?
**[11:11] ata**
I never did.
**[11:14] ata**
I always just waited for him to talk to me...
**[11:17] ata**
I never went up and talked to him.
**[11:20] ata**
Something inside me wouldn't let me do it.
**[11:23] ata**
But now...
**[11:29] shu**
Anyway, for now, let's save Papa Kamo.
**[11:34] shu**
We can think about the
rest in the bath later.
**[11:39] ata**
Not a bad proposal.
**[11:42] shu**
What do you think, Furanui?
**[11:46] kar**
Furanui!
**[11:50] fura**
Agreed!
**[11:53] fura**
Minister Wao!
**[11:55] fura**
You tricked us so that you could
incite rebellion against our king!
**[11:59] fura**
Now you will pay!
**[12:02] wao**
Furanui...
**[12:03] wao**
So you've been taken in by Karls'
"happy" nonsense as well...
**[12:07] wao**
I had you study kingship
**[12:10] wao**
in the hopes that you would be the
successor to my reign of terror...
**[12:14] wao**
But never mind that now.
**[12:15] wao**
In that case, I'll punish you all!
**[12:21] kar**
We won't lose! We want everyone to be happy!
**[12:32] fura**
Minister Wao!
**[12:33] fura**
Did you pit Karls and me against each
other so that you could prepare your coup?
**[12:41] kar**
That's awful! It's not happy at all!
**[12:44] wao**
Indeed I did.
**[12:45] wao**
And Honyala Land is now mine!
**[12:48] fura**
I won't let you get away with this!
**[12:51] wao**
Won't you?
**[12:57] shu**
This again?
**[13:18] ata**
Are you all right?
**[13:19] shu**
Yeah...
**[13:20] kar**
Be careful!
**[13:21] fura**
It's coming again!
**[13:26] wao**
How dare you!
**[13:28] wao**
Take this!
**[13:31] both**
Hai-hai-sir!
**[13:34] wao**
Your magic isn't strong enough to stop this!
**[13:48] wao**
Is that all the power you can bring to bear?
**[13:51] wao**
I'll wipe happiness from
the face of this world!
**[13:54] kamo**
Minister Wao...
**[13:57] kamo**
Rather... my little brother Wao...
**[13:59] wao**
You're calling me your little brother now?
**[14:02] wao**
I've served you all this time
and you never cared how I felt!
**[14:05] kamo**
Wao, I don't believe I've ever
held any enmity towards you.
**[14:11] wao**
That can't be true!
**[14:13] kamo**
It's true, I think!
**[14:15] kamo**
I let you lead the ship of state
because I trusted you, I think.
**[14:20] kamo**
Wao, I don't think I ever knew
you were so upset, probably.
**[14:26] wao**
Stop ducking responsibility!
Say something without hedging!
**[14:29] kamo**
I love you!
**[14:33] kamo**
I love Karls and Furanui too, I think.
**[14:36] wao**
No... It can't be true!
**[14:39] kamo**
I felt happy, I do believe...
**[14:42] kamo**
Yes, that night when we looked
at the moon together...
**[14:48] (Flashback) both**
Look, a rabbit!
**[14:50] (Flashback) kamo**
Maybe?
**[14:53] kamo**
Wao. Do you feel like you remember that?
**[14:56] wao**
I do...
**[14:58] wao**
You're right that I felt happy then.
**[15:01] shu**
That kind of thing does happen.
**[15:03] shu**
Happiness comes from the most trivial things.
**[15:07] waku**
Like when I get an upright stalk in my tea.
**[15:09] dogo**
When I land a ball of scrap
paper in the wastebasket!
**[15:12] kiri**
When I wake up thinking I'm late,
but I realize I have time to spare!
**[15:16] man**
Or when I look at the clock
and it's all the same number.
**[15:20] una**
For me...
**[15:22] una**
I feel happy whenever I get the taste of
pickled plum in the rice of my shumai.
**[15:27] shira**
For me, it's when I do my hair just right.
**[15:31] ata**
For me... When I learned how to
spin my mechanical pencil, I think.
**[15:38] kar**
That's right!
**[15:39] kar**
Happiness isn't something you seek out!
It's something you feel!
**[15:47] wao**
What is this happy aura?
**[15:49] shu**
I think it's impossible to wipe
happiness from the world, don't you?
**[15:54] shu**
It's something that just
comes to you from all around.
**[15:58] ata**
Yes. If you take a step
forward, it's there.
**[16:01] wao**
Take a step forward?
**[16:04] kar**
Okay, let's all make Minister Wao happy!
**[16:11] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:13] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:14] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:16] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:18] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:19] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:21] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:22] kar**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[16:29] kar**
Make you happy! Yeah!
**[16:36] kar**
Make you happy! Yeah!
**[16:37] kar**
When you're happy, you happy it up!
**[16:40] kar**
Awesome!
**[16:41] kar**
Everybody happy now!
Happy it down! Hap-hap-happy!
**[16:44] kar**
Happy bath! Happy dive!
**[16:45] kar**
Happy happy now!
**[16:47] kar**
Happy bath! Happy dive!
**[16:49] kar**
Happy happy for you!
**[16:51] kar**
Being happy means happying!
**[16:52] kar**
Happy up your happiness!
**[16:54] kar**
Time to happy it up to ultra happy!
**[16:57] kar**
Happy bath! Happy dive!
**[16:59] kar**
Happy happy now!
**[17:00] kar**
Happy bath! Happy dive!
**[17:02] kar**
Happy happy for you!
**[17:04] waku**
Anywhere you are, there's a
way to be happy! Check it out!
**[17:07] waku**
Where is it?
**[17:07] waku**
Right here!
**[17:08] waku**
Over there?
**[17:08] waku**
There too!
**[17:09] waku**
Everywhere?
**[17:10] waku**
Happy in the bath!
**[17:11] waku**
Happy with a nap!
**[17:12] waku**
Happy in your room!
**[17:13] waku**
Happy with a kiss!
**[17:14] waku**
Happy with magic!
**[17:14] waku**
Happy with sweets!
**[17:15] waku**
Happy! Happy! Happy! Happy!
**[17:19] waku**
Let's happy hour!
**[17:21] waku**
Super Happy Fiore Kiss!
**[17:27] waku**
Super Happy Stella Kiss!
**[17:32] waku**
Super Happy Luna Kiss!
**[17:37] waku**
Super Happy Neve Kiss!
**[17:42] waku**
Super Happy Spazio Kiss!
**[17:47] waku**
Super Happy Ritter Diamant!
**[17:52] waku**
Super Happy Ritter Rosenquarz!
**[17:56] waku**
Super Happy Ritter Amethyst!
**[18:06] waku**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[18:08] waku**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[18:09] waku**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[18:11] waku**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[18:13] waku**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[18:14] waku**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[18:16] waku**
Are you happy? Yes!
**[18:18] waku**
Let's happy hour!
**[18:20] waku**
*We want to see that smile of yours again*
**[18:27] waku**
*That's why we came running here to see you*
**[18:33] waku**
*We'll do everything we can to make you happy!*
**[18:39] waku**
Let's happy hour!
**[18:52] waku**
Return to happiness!
**[18:54] waku**
Super Happy and Turn!
**[19:14] waku**
Feels like heaven...
**[19:22] shu**
Super Happy End.
**[19:27] puri**
What a nice nap...
**[19:31] kamo**
There, there.
**[19:32] kamo**
Wao, I think you should
rest a while, maybe...
**[19:35] kamo**
You've been working very hard.
You're very tired, I expect.
**[19:39] wao**
After all I did...
**[19:42] wao**
why would you be so kind to me?
**[19:44] kamo**
Because you're my dear brother, probably.
**[19:52] karu**
That's right, take a nice nap in the sun.
**[19:56] karu**
We can't be happy unless
you're happy, Minister Wao!
**[20:02] shu**
Go on and be happy.
**[20:29] kiri**
This is heaven!
**[20:31] dogo**
Yeah, it sure is heaven.
**[20:34] waku**
I think I can agree with that.
**[20:36] man**
You think everything's back
to normal in Honyala Land?
**[20:39] una**
I think it's probably fine.
**[20:40] una**
We saw the birth of two kings.
**[20:43] (Flashback) kamo**
My beloved princes!
**[20:46] (Flashback) kamo**
You did a wonderful job making
everyone happy, I think.
**[20:49] (Flashback) fura**
Karls, I lost to you.
**[20:52] (Flashback) fura**
Happiness is necessary to
rule a country, after all.
**[20:56] (Flashback) fura**
You're more suited to being king than I.
**[20:58] (Flashback) karu**
It's not about winning or losing.
**[21:00] (Flashback) karu**
The question is about whether
you're happy or not.
**[21:05] (Flashback) fura**
In that regard, I really can't beat you.
**[21:07] (Flashback) shu**
Then why don't you become
co-kings or something?
**[21:10] (Flashback) kamo**
Oh, that would good, maybe!
**[21:13] (Flashback) kamo**
You can each compensate
for the other's weaknesses
**[21:15] (Flashback) kamo**
and rule Honyala Land together, perhaps.
**[21:20] shira**
I wonder if they're really
going to be co-kings.
**[21:23] dogo**
He did say maybe...
**[21:26] man**
Like he was ducking the question.
**[21:28] una**
Papa Kamo is a duck, he has to talk like one.
**[21:31] waku**
You are now both kings... I think?
**[21:34] kiri**
It's all so non-committal.
**[21:51] shu**
We haven't had our handshake, have we?
**[22:07] shu**
Baths feel nice, don't they?
**[22:09] ata**
Yeah.
**[22:11] shu**
Ata, let's take a bath together another time.
**[22:15] shu**
I've come here pretty much every day since then.
**[22:19] shu**
I guess you could call it a habit?
***SIGN*** They brought hot springs from the human world to make all of Honyala Land happy!
***SIGN*** Thanks for watching, everybody! I hope we can meet again some day!
***SIGN*** Now, one last time... Are you happy?