Cute High Earth Defense Club LOVE!

The story revolves around the members of the “Earth Defense Club” aka the “Do Nothing Club” at Binan High School. One day, the club members are soaking in a hot bath together when all of a sudden a mysterious pink wombat appears out of thin air! The wombat asks the members to lend it their help to protect the Earth. At school the next day, each of the club members receives a magical bracelet enveloping them in a dazzling light.

Season 1

Season 1

1 - In the Name of Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[00:14] atsushi
    Ah, it's great being first in the bath.
[00:16] en
    Atsushi, you know, there's something
    I've been thinking about lately.
[00:21] atsushi
    What is it, En-chan?
    The tax increase? The Olympics?
[00:24] en
    No, chikuwabu.
[00:26] atsushi
    Chikuwabu?
[00:27] en
    He's a real mystery, you know?
[00:30] atsushi
    It's just chikuwabu...
[00:33] en
    Not quite chikuwa, not quite fu.
[00:35] en
    He doesn't exist outside of oden.
[00:37] en
    Why is he even alive?
[00:39] atsu
    Well, it's not alive...
[00:40] en
    He's excluded from both the paste products
    group and the wheat gluten group.
[00:45] en
    When I think about how he must feel,
    it's kind of depressing.
[00:48] atsu
    But there are people who like chikuwabu.
[00:51] en
    Oh? You like chikuwabu?
[00:53] en
    Gonna start a club? A chikuwabu-bu?
[00:55] atsu
    What? Chikuwabu-bu is too hard to say.
[00:58] en
    It's the wabu-bu who plot
    to dominate via chikuwabu.
[01:01] atsu
    You're abbreviating it...
[01:03] en
    Daikon radish and tofu fritters
    contribute to the diversity that is oden
[01:08] en
    by creating a savory flavor.
[01:11] en
    Yet chikuwabu only absorbs that savoriness,
[01:14] en
    offering nothing of its own.
[01:15] atsu
    Couldn't you say the same of konjac?
[01:17] en
    No, konjac is at least flexible.
[01:21] en
    It's broad-minded enough to absorb that
    savoriness into its deepest parts.
[01:25] en
    Yet, with chikuwabu, you can
    boil it for hours and hours,
[01:28] en
    and most of it will remain nothing
    but wheat flour mixed with water.
[01:33] en
    It gives off the superficial appearance
    of melting and integrating itself while,
[01:38] en
    deep down, it rejects others and
    denies its wheat-based origins.
[01:41] atsu
    Uh, En-chan, do you hate chikuwabu?
[01:44] en
    I don't know if I hate it.
[01:45] en
    I just feel like I'm looking at an unknown lifeform.
[01:48] atsu
    But it's not a lifeform...
[01:55] wombat
    Where might this be?
[01:59] atsu
    A public bath... Why do you ask?
[02:01] wombat
    What is a pub-lic-bath?
[02:03] atsu
    It's a place where you pay money
    to sit in heated water,
[02:06] atsu
    to maintain bodily hygiene and relax the mind.
[02:10] wombat
    Relax the mind!
[02:12] wombat
    The people of this planet have an even
    more refined civilization than I thought!
[02:19] wombat
    How I should like to protect this planet...
[02:22] ---
    R-Right...
[02:23] wombat
    Would you mind helping me?
[02:27] wombat
    Please!
[02:30] wombat
    Um... I'd just like...
[02:32] wombat
    to talk...
[02:36] en
    H-Hey! It stinks! It hurts!
    The fur's pricking me!
[02:39] atsu
    What is this thing? A bear? A dog? A pig?
[02:41] yumoto
    Sirs! Please, no wrestling in the bath!
[02:46] yumoto
    A wombat!
[02:51] yumoto
    Diprotodontia Macropodidae!
[02:52] yumoto
    Cousin to the koala!
[02:54] yumoto
    They get sick if they get lonely
    and have flat noses!
[02:57] ---
    There, there! Don't struggle!
[03:00] wombat
    Help me!
[03:05] en
    That kid is something else.
[03:07] en
    Most people would run at the
    sight of a creature like that.
[03:09] en
    And a pink one, no less.
[03:11] atsu
    He's a first year at our school.
    Hakone Yumoto, I think.
[03:21] atsu
    Heading home now?
[03:24] en
    The student council must have it rough.
[03:27] yuuma
    And you must have it easy.
[03:30] en
    In oden terms, they're daikon radish,
    egg, and mochi-stuffed tofu.
[03:35] atsu
    Is that a compliment?
[03:36] en
    A serious compliment.
    That's the golden trio, you know?
[03:39] atsu
    No konjac, huh?
[03:42] yumoto
    Wait for me!
[03:45] atsu
    So what is he? In oden terms.
[03:48] en
    The pot, maybe?
[03:49] atsu
    That's not food...
[03:51] wombat
    Help!
[03:53] yumoto
    Wait, I said!
SIGN    In the Name of Love
SIGN    Binan High School
[04:10] chiku
    My name is Chiku Kazutake.
SIGN    Chiku Kazutake
[04:13] chiku
    I'm a student at Binan High School.
[04:16] chiku
    I have no strong subjects.
    No weak subjects, either.
[04:19] chiku
    I'm a member of the Biology Club,
    but I never actually attend.
[04:23] chiku
    My theory is that humans can be
    divided into three categories... I think.
[04:28] man
    The beautiful Nozomi invited us to a mixer.
[04:31] man
    Sorry, my schedule's full already.
[04:33] chiku
    The beautiful, the ugly...
    and those who are neither.
[04:38] man
    I'm going to be participating
    in the Math Olympics.
[04:41] man
    I'm in the New Year's poetry reading!
[04:43] chiku
    The smart, the stupid...
    and those who are neither.
[04:48] man
    Ten more laps!
[04:49] man
    Okay! C'mon!
[04:51] chiku
    The athletic, the frail...
    and those who are neither.
[04:57] man
    What?
[04:58] man
    I bumped into something.
[05:01] chiku
    I'm... the third kind.
SIGN    Class 3-C
[05:19] atsu
    Stand!
[05:23] student
    Is that a pet?
[05:23] student
    A stuffed animal?
[05:24] student
    Isn't it huge?
[05:25] student
    It's giant!
[05:25] student
    Why'd he bring an animal here?
[05:27] student
    Hey, you think Tawarayama's
    finally... you know?
[05:29] student
    That, huh?
[05:31] student
    Finally losing his marbles?
[05:34] atsu
    Bow.
[05:36] atsu
    Take your seats.
[05:38] wombat
    You boys are...
[05:41] student
    Did that voice come from the animal?
[05:43] student
    That wasn't Tawarayama's voice.
[05:45] tamura
    No. It is nothing.
[05:47] tamura
    We shall begin class now.
[05:51] student
    "Shall"?
[05:52] student
    "Shall"?
[05:54] atsu
    En-chan...
[05:55] en
    I've got a bad feeling about this.
[06:00] tamura
    Ah, begging your pardon, you two.
[06:03] tamura
    No, please, wait for me!
[06:06] wombat
    Won't you please hear me out?
[06:09] atsu
    Yeah, he's talking.
[06:10] wombat
    Oh, forgive me.
[06:11] wombat
    Circumstances demand that
    I draw attention away from myself,
[06:15] wombat
    so I would appreciate it if you would act
    as if you're speaking to this individual.
[06:19] atsu
    Little late for that!
[06:20] wombat
    But to meet you two again
    like this must be destiny!
[06:24] en
    No, destiny has nothing to do with it.
[06:25] wombat
    Please come with me!
[06:26] en
    Pass.
[06:27] wombat
    Do you mean "pass" as in "approved"?
[06:29] atsu
    Is that some old con man trick?
[06:31] en
    On Earth, it means "I refuse."
[06:33] wombat
    Wonderful!
[06:35] wombat
    Please, teach me everything there is
    to know about Earth culture and customs!
[06:39] atsu
    Too much responsibility!
[06:40] en
    Why don't you ask Mr. Tawarayama?
[06:42] wombat
    Oh, no, you see, this individual has some
    difficulties with mobility and endurance...
[06:46] en
    That seemed vaguely insulting.
[06:47] atsu
    Wasn't he turning 77 this year?
[06:49] en
    No, that's not what I'm talking about.
[06:50] wombat
    Setting that aside, I want us to protect this
    lovable Earth with the power of love together!
[06:56] wombat
    Why, you ask? I do it all for love!
[06:59] en
    No, we didn't ask.
[07:00] atsu
    Sorry, but we have other things to do.
[07:01] en
    That's right! I need to meditate
    on the matter of chikuwabu!
[07:05] wombat
    Chikuwabu? What's that?
[07:07] en
    It's a thing that exists, yet does not exist!
    Like a symbol of uncertainty!
[07:11] en
    I'm trying to figure out the purpose
    of chikuwabu's existence!
[07:17] chiku
    Chikuwabu's... purpose?
[07:22] yumoto
    So this is where you were!
[07:24] yumoto
    What, are you trying to be
    Mr. Tawarayama's pet?
[07:27] yumoto
    Using him as your hands?
     Going undercover? Want a rice ball?
[07:30] wombat
    Pardon me, but would you mind
    saving me from that threat?
[07:34] en
    Why?
[07:35] wombat
    I realize that he presents no hatred
    or malice, but instincts dictate...
[07:39] yumoto
    I won't let you run again!
[07:41] wombat
    I'll die if he gets near me!
[07:43] yumoto
    Why? Why? I read on the net
    that wombats love rice balls!
[07:47] yumoto
    I wanna cuddle you!
[07:48] wombat
    Pass!
[07:50] yumoto
    That means "approved," right?
[07:53] atsu
    Are you okay?
[07:55] chiku
    Yes...
[07:57] atsu
    I don't know whether to call it
    a question or an opinion, but...
[08:00] atsu
    Those two really aren't on the
    same wavelength, are they?
[08:03] en
    Not a bit.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[08:07] ryuu
    Yo.
[08:08] io
    Good day, Senpai.
[08:10] atsu
    Io. How are you doing today?
[08:12] io
    Feeling like I just dropped a
    lump of butter into boiling oil.
[08:15] atsu
    And you, Ryuu?
[08:16] ryuu
    Just perfect, by certain standards.
[08:18] io
    I melted off twenty million in twenty minutes.
[08:21] ryuu
    I ended up triple-booked.
    I'm really in trouble.
[08:24] en
    You guys amaze me.
[08:26] io
    Money is...
[08:27] ryuu
    Women are...
[08:28] both
    Life!
[08:30] io
    Oh, speaking of which,
[08:31] io
    I found this on the door.
SIGN    Urgent Please register your club officially. -Student Council
[08:34] en
    A student council request for club registration?
[08:37] atsu
    In other words, if we want to use the room,
    we need to officially register as a club.
[08:42] en
    What a pain.
[08:43] ryuu
    That's why I keep telling you
[08:45] ryuu
    we should be the Innocent Co-Ed Mingle Club!
[08:47] atsu
    That violates public decency!
[08:49] io
    Then what about the
    Economics in Practice Club?
[08:52] atsu
    It's lacking in high school student character!
[08:54] atsu
    ...is what the student council
    president would say, I expect.
[08:57] en
    Good point.
[08:58] en
    Why not just make it the Earth Defense Club?
[09:01] atsu
    Oh, that thing hanging on the door...
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[09:03] io
    The mystery sign that's been hanging
    there since who knows when, right?
[09:07] en
    Why not? This is a pain.
[09:08] atsu
    We can't do that.
[09:10] atsu
    We've been buying time by
    saying we'll submit it soon,
[09:13] atsu
    but this might be the limit.
[09:14] io
    Clubs need at least five members.
[09:16] ryuu
    We need an advisor, too.
[09:21] atsu
    Mr. Tawarayama?!
[09:23] ryuu
    Is he... dead?
[09:31] en
    The aftermath?
SIGN    Hakone Yumoto
    Born January 26th
    Blood Type O / Aquarius
    Hobby: Exercise
    Likes: Animals, rice balls
[09:53] chiku
    The purpose of chikuwabu...
[09:56] chiku
    It has no purpose.
[09:57] chiku
    Chikuwabu could disappear
    and no one would care.
[10:00] white
    That's right. And you could disappear, too...
[10:13] yumoto
    This is bliss.
[10:14] yumoto
    Cuddling really is great!
[10:17] atsu
    Are you Hakone Yumoto?
[10:19] yumoto
    Yeah! Thanks for always
    usin' the Kurotama Bath!
[10:22] yumoto
    Aren't animals awesome?
[10:24] yumoto
    My cuddle battery's charged up
    for the first time in forever!
[10:29] en
    I think he really is dea—
[10:31] atsu
    Don't say it.
[10:36] en
    He came back to life?!
[10:38] wombat
    After all this, I won't
    ask any more of you boys!
[10:40] wombat
    On the contrary, I'm going to
    make you take responsibility!
[10:44] atsu
    Responsibility?
[10:45] ryuu
    For what?
[10:46] yumoto
    He's saying we can cuddle
    for the rest of our lives!
[10:49] wombat
    It'll take too long to explain,
    so I'll make it quick!
[10:52] wombat
    Lovracelet!
[10:58] yumoto
    What's this?
[10:59] yumoto
    You're giving them to us?
    "The Wombat Returns"?
[11:02] wombat
    The Lovracelets are your love, given form!
[11:05] yumoto
    Wombat's love given form?
[11:08] en
    Wait, what the hell is "love given form"?
[11:11] yumoto
    It buzzed!
[11:12] ryu
    Are these defective?
[11:14] io
    That's a problem. Should I contact the
    manufacturer and earn us a quick buck?
[11:17] atsu
    You're surprisingly unscrupulous.
[11:20] wombat
    They are not defective!
[11:23] wombat
    That's the Lovracelet's Love Alert!
[11:25] wombat
    Let's go!
[11:28] wombat
    It kindly lets you know immediately
[11:30] wombat
    when the loveless are thinking loveless
    thoughts and taking loveless actions!
[11:35] atsu
    "Kindly" lets us know?
[11:37] yumoto
    You're pretty smart for
    someone so fuzzy, Wombat.
[11:39] wombat
    Incidentally, I am not one of your
    Earth mammals known as the wombat.
[11:44] yumoto
    What?!
[11:46] ryuu
    No, I think it's weirder that
    you're surprised by that.
[11:48] yumoto
    But he can speak our language!
[11:50] io
    No, I think that just makes it weirder.
[11:52] atsu
    And he's pink, at that.
[11:54] wombat
    Don't worry about conversing.
[11:56] wombat
    I have a high-performance
    automatic translator.
[11:59] io
    That's an amazing thing to just blurt out.
[12:01] wombat
    My name is $%@ and I come from &!@$.
[12:04] atsu
    What? Say that again?
[12:06] wombat
    I am ^%@# and I come from $!@#.
[12:09] en
    Was it different that time?
[12:10] wombat
    It's %@#$%!
[12:11] yumoto
    Oh, forget it! We can just go with
    Wombat. Right, Wombat?
[12:15] chikuwa
    What's your deal, man?
[12:16] chikuwa
    Huh? Huh?
[12:19] chikuwa
    You got a problem with me? Huh? Huh?
[12:22] yumoto
    What's that thing?
[12:24] ryuu
    Chikuwabu.
[12:25] io
    You said it!
[12:26] ryuu
    But it's clearly chikuwabu!
[12:29] yumoto
    The Chikawabu Monster?
[12:31] atsu
    You just casually named it.
[12:32] en
    Aren't you going to cuddle it?
[12:34] yumoto
    Nah, that's a little out of my range.
[12:36] atsu
    You have a range?
[12:38] yumoto
    What are you saying? Of course I do.
[12:41] yumoto
    Doesn't it look a little sticky?
[12:43] atsu
    Its surface does seem to be melting...
[12:45] en
    It's a little gross for me, too.
[12:47] ryuu
    Is it?
[12:48] io
    Uh, I think the monster part is a bigger
    problem than the chikuwabu part...
[12:51] wombat
    That's right!
[12:53] wombat
    Now, you must "Love Making"
    into the Battle Lovers!
[12:56] en
    Huh? Love Ma—
[12:58] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[13:01] io
    What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
[13:04] ryuu
    "Beloved Earth"?
[13:06] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[13:09] io
    You, too?
[13:11] io
    Love is all!
[13:14] atsu
    Are you... being forced to say this?
[13:16] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[13:18] yumoto
    I get it!
[13:19] yumoto
    Making us pose and say embarrassing lines
    is part of your mysterious power, right?
[13:23] wom
    No, it is the power of love!
[13:26] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[13:29] five
    Battle Lovers!
[13:33] yumoto
    Love Making!
[14:00] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[14:01] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[14:05] en
    Love Making.
[14:15] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[14:16] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[14:19] atsu
    Love Making!
[14:29] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[14:30] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[14:34] io
    Love Making.
[14:44] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[14:45] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[14:48] ryuu
    Love Making!
[14:58] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[14:59] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[15:02] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[15:05] five
    Of love!
[15:08] yumoto
    What is all this?!
[15:11] en
    We look like some third-rate idol group.
[15:14] io
    I know. The needless exposure
    and mysterious ornamentations...
[15:17] io
    This is clearly beyond weird.
[15:19] ryuu
    But it looks better on
    me than I was expecting!
[15:21] io
    I suppose it does.
[15:23] ryuu
    This will be trouble!
    I'll end up even more popular.
[15:26] atsu
    It won't come off!
[15:27] en
    Seriously?
[15:28] en
    Seriously!
[15:29] io
    What, we have to stay like this forever?!
[15:31] en
    Please, undo this!
[15:33] wombat
    It's a bit late to be saying that!
[15:35] wombat
    You boys are the Battle Lovers
    who protect the Earth!
[15:39] yumoto
    And what's this "Sparkling Prince" stuff?
[15:41] yumoto
    I don't think it's quite right
    for me to call myself a prince.
[15:44] atsu
    You seem overly self-conscious.
[15:46] wombat
    No matter.
[15:47] wombat
    You are the heirs to the throne of love,
[15:49] wombat
    so you have the right to call yourselves princes.
[15:53] en
    It's not about having the right...
[15:55] atsu
    First of all, we don't
    want to be heirs to that.
[15:57] wombat
    What was that?!
[15:59] yumoto
    I don't even know what
    the "throne of love" is.
[16:01] ryuu
    I hope it's romantic love.
[16:02] io
    It's not.
[16:04] chikuwa
    I don't need love!
[16:08] atsu
    The Chikuwabu Monster has lost his temper!
[16:10] atsu
    He forced his way into the conversation!
[16:12] chikuwa
    Live and die for love? Hah!
[16:15] chikuwa
    Humans should all just die!
[16:19] yumoto
    Broth? Broth?!
[16:20] chikuwa
    No one needs daikon radish, egg,
     chikuwa, hanpen, or cabbage rolls!
[16:24] chikuwa
    I'm going to make a world of only chikuwabu!
[16:27] trio
    Huh?!
[16:29] chikuwa
    Once I do, the world will be united!
[16:38] atsu
    What is this?
[16:39] wombat
    This is your Love Making power!
[16:42] wombat
    It's a "love up" of your inner love!
[16:46] yumoto
    Cool!
[16:48] yumoto
    Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy!
[16:49] wombat
    You tried to destroy the people
    who live on this lovable Earth.
[16:54] wombat
    Go, and love even your enemies!
[17:00] yumoto
    Love Stick!
[17:04] en
    Huh? Is this love or discipline?
[17:08] wombat
    Love, while gentle, is also harsh!
[17:10] yumoto
    Can I shoot a beam with this? Can I?
[17:13] yumoto
    Can I?!
[17:15] yumoto
    I can!
[17:16] four
    Seriously?!
[17:17] chikuwa
    Love can go take a hike!
[17:22] yumoto
    Yeah!
[17:23] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince is gonna
    sparkle your sparkles off!
[17:34] atsu
    It's incredible how quickly he adapts.
[17:36] en
    Yeah.
[17:38] ryuu
    I don't like letting him
    get all the limelight.
[17:41] oi
    Oh? You getting in the mood?
[17:43] ryuu
    I could tell great stories about this later.
[17:44] ryuu
    I'm going to join the fight!
[17:47] atsu
    Well, we may as well treat a farce as a farce...
[17:49] en
    ...and just get it over with quickly.
[17:51] io
    Yeah.
[18:00] atsu
    Um, let's go with... Something-or-Other Storm!
[18:04] monster
    What?!
[18:06] atsu
    It actually fired!
[18:07] en
    That was pretty random.
[18:09] en
    Random Splash!
[18:13] io
    Then I'll join in.
[18:14] io
    Added Margin Bomber!
[18:18] ryuu
    That's not fair! I got here first!
[18:20] ryuu
    I Am Awesome Fire!
[18:25] monster
    Five against one is cheating!
[18:27] atsu
    Yeah, right. You were the one
    saying all humans should die.
[18:31] atsu
    You can't let five of them scare you.
[18:33] yumoto
    Okay, let's go! Something-or-Other—
[18:35] wombat
    Pardon me.
[18:36] wombat
    Could you all please stop calling
    out random attack names?
[18:42] yumoto
    In that case, our powers unite to...
[18:56] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[19:12] atsu
    Hey, Yumoto, that was overkill.
[19:15] monster
    I don't need your pity.
[19:17] monster
    Charity and comfort are useless to me.
[19:22] en
    That's convenient for an enemy to say.
[19:24] atsu
    Stop this! If you say any more,
    you'll raise a defeat flag!
[19:28] monster
    We chikuwabu have a chikuwabu sort of pride!
[19:32] monster
    Even if you won't acknowledge its existence,
[19:34] monster
    I will continue to live on, as chikuwabu!
[19:37] atsu
    It's not that we don't acknowledge it...
[19:40] ryuu
    If I have to choose one way or
    the other, I like chikuwabu.
[19:43] en
    Yeah.
[19:44] en
    Some people have strange tastes.
    Good things will come your way someday.
[19:47] io
    That's not very convincing support.
[19:50] monster
    Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
[19:52] monster
    I don't need your support!
[19:54] monster
    Inconspicuousness is still a flavor!
[19:56] monster
    It beats ending up with a dubious status like
    burdock tempura or squid tentacle tempura!
[20:00] monster
    Lay off, jerk!
[20:05] en
    Physical force?
[20:06] atsu
    What was the point of that
    finishing move earlier?
[20:08] yumoto
    Listen, you need to wake up!
[20:11] yumoto
    Oden isn't complete with only one ingredient.
[20:14] yumoto
    The popular trio of daikon radish,
    egg, and mochi-stuffed tofu,
[20:18] yumoto
    the low-profile burdock tempura,
[20:19] yumoto
    the amiable thick-fried tofu,
    the non-conforming cabbage rolls...
[20:23] yumoto
    And chikuwabu!
[20:24] yumoto
    When they all come together,
    that's what you call oden!
[20:27] yumoto
    The world, the Earth... It's all oden, too!
[20:30] yumoto
    Oden is the Earth! You get it?
[20:34] ---
    Uh-huh.
[20:36] io
    He kind of forced it all to fit together, huh?
[20:38] ryuu
    I can't tell if that's too big or too small.
[20:42] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[20:52] monster
    What is this mysterious sensation?
[20:55] monster
    Comfort... Healing...
[20:57] monster
    I feel the universe soaking
    into me like a golden broth...
[21:00] monster
    I see... So this is love...
[21:07] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:09] four
    No, it's not!
[21:11] en
    Huh? What was that guy's name?
[21:13] en
    From the class next to ours...
[21:15] atsu
    I remember. He's kinda low-profile, but...
[21:18] en
    He looks clean and refreshed,
    like he just had a bath.
[21:20] ---
    Yeah.
[21:21] io
    While we're the ones who are a total mess.
[21:25] ryuu
    I reek of broth!
[21:26] yumoto
    When that happens,
    just hit up the Kurotama Bath!
[21:29] yumoto
    I have coupons!
[21:31] yumoto
    Oh, yeah!
[21:32] yumoto
    One for you, too!
[21:34] en
    Yeah, let's do that.
    A hot bath after a bloodbath.
[21:37] atsu
    Ugh, that pissed me off.
[21:39] io
    Me, too.
[21:39] ryuu
    Totally.
[21:40] wombat
    I'll join you!
[21:42] yumoto
    Come on over!
[21:43] atsu
    Say, why is Mr. Tawarayama
    carrying you everywhere?
[21:46] wombat
    If I get too far away from him...
[21:50] white
    Just who are they?
[21:53] light
    Has someone appeared to try to defy us?
[21:57] white
    No matter. This is well within our expectations.
[22:01] white
    Next time, the real battle will begin.
[22:05] hedgehog
    Prepare yourselves, Earth Conquest Club.
[22:08] white
    Yes, sir.
[23:40] yumoto
    Before we even realized what was happening,
[23:42] yumoto
    we ended up protecting the Earth!
[23:45] yumoto
    But I don't mind joining the Battle Lovers
    if it means I get to cuddle Wombat!
[23:50] yumoto
    Next time: Love Means Never Feeling Regret.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love Means Never Feeling Regret
[23:53] yumoto
    Love Making!

Season 1

2 - Love Means Never Feeling Regret

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Love Means Never Feeling Regret
[01:36] kusatsu
    Arima. It's too soon.
[01:38] ari
    Really?
[01:39] ari
    I don't think one or two minutes
    makes a difference, myself...
[01:43] kusatsu
    Those who are negligent in etiquette
    will be negligent in all things.
[01:47] kusatsu
    Lifestyle, academics,
[01:49] kusatsu
    self-respect...
[01:51] ari
    Yes, yes. Whatever you say.
[01:55] gero
    President Kusatsu is as strict as ever.
[01:58] kusa
    Akoya, it is easy to drift downwards.
[02:01] kusa
    We, the student council of Binan High School,
[02:04] kusa
    regard foolishness and mediocrity as a sin.
[02:06] kusa
    We must not approve of it.
[02:08] gero
    Understood.
[02:09] arima
    Here you are. This is Seishodo's "White Dew."
[02:16] gero
    Arima-san, it's delicious.
[02:21] arima
    Glad to hear it.
[02:22] arima
    It was worth sending away for.
[02:25] zun
    Now, rulers of this blue world.
[02:28] zun
    Members of the noble Caerula Adamas.
[02:30] zun
    Let us begin the executive meeting of the
    Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms Project.
[02:35] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[02:37] all
    Of love!
[02:41] arima
    Why are their faces blurred out?
    Their voices are strange, too.
[02:45] kusa
    We haven't done anything to it.
[02:47] kusa
    It seems they scrambled the
    information themselves.
[02:50] yumoto
    Love is over!
[02:53] kusa
    Do you think they intend to interrupt our
    Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms Project,
[02:59] kusa
    Lord Zundar?
[03:00] zun
    The possibility exists.
[03:03] gero
    Does that mean they've been given
    the same technology we have?
[03:09] zun
    That voice and image filter is a product
    of highly advanced scientific technology.
[03:14] ari
    You mean that "voices have been changed
    in the interests of privacy" thing?
[03:19] zun
    It is on par with the scientific
    technology of my planet.
[03:23] kusa
    Planet Evil, you mean?
[03:25] zun
    Correct.
[03:27] zun
    If they do exist to oppose us,
    we will need to take caution.
[03:31] gero
    The things they wear and say
    have no style whatsoever.
[03:34] gero
    They can't possibly compete with us.
[03:36] gero
    Or should I say, I dislike even the
    idea of thinking them as equals.
[03:40] ari
    I suppose we should watch them for a while?
[03:42] zun
    If they appear next time, we will
    need to consider countermeasures.
[03:46] zun
    For now, let us move forward
    with the Earth Conquest Project.
[03:50] kusa
    Yes. The superior should rule and
    guide the world's development.
[03:54] kusa
    To this end, the foolish and the acts
    of barbarism they commit must be purged.
[03:59] ari
    That's quite the ambitious undertaking, I must say.
[04:02] kusa
    Well then, Arima...
[04:04] kusa
    The state of this Earth.
[04:05] kusa
    This city.
[04:07] kusa
    This school. Do you approve of it?
[04:10] kusa
    Base and vulgar.
[04:12] kusa
    Ignorant and incompetent.
[04:13] kusa
    Stupid and silly.
[04:16] kusa
    Should such students run
    rampant over Binan High School?
[04:19] ari
    Oh, well...
[04:23] ari
    I do think some degree of
    order might be necessary.
[04:26] kusa
    Which means we must first establish a
    model society in our immediate vicinity.
[04:31] kusa
    Namely...
[04:32] gero
    The Binan High School Conquest Project, right?
[04:36] gero
    I unilaterally agree with President Kusatsu.
[04:39] gero
    I don't want to look at ugly and dirty things.
[04:42] zun
    The inferior beings should fight with
    their fellows, and destroy themselves.
[04:48] kusa
    That's entirely logical.
[04:50] zun
    Then you should make use of the humans'
    short-tempered, violent natures.
[04:54] zun
    First, we need someone who
    can execute the operation.
[04:57] kusa
    Find someone to be our puppet,
    and act through them, right?
[05:02] zun
    Correct.
[05:04] zun
    Lend him just a bit of our power.
[05:07] zun
    Anger, hatred, jealousy...
[05:10] zun
    They burn more easily than dry leaves.
[05:14] kusa
    Understood, Lord Zundar.
[05:16] kusa
    Then let us find us our fool at once.
[05:19] zun
    Caerula Adamas, I leave this to you.
[05:22] all
    Sir!
[05:25] en
    Did you know?
[05:27] en
    People say it's not true
    that forests are disappearing
[05:30] en
    to make disposable chopsticks.
[05:32] ryu
    Where did that come from, Yufuin-senpai?
[05:35] en
    Disposable chopsticks are made from
    trees cut down to thin out forests,
[05:38] en
    so they're logical from an eco-friendly,
    recycling point of view.
[05:41] atsu
    I know that.
[05:43] en
    Well then, the phrase "boiled down"
[05:46] en
    originally referred to reaching a
    conclusion after a lengthy discussion.
[05:50] en
    Did you know that?
[05:51] atsu
    A crime of conscience or
    inappropriate laughter, right?
[05:53] yumoto
    Speaking of disposable
    chopsticks getting boiled down,
[05:55] yumoto
    my bro Gora taught me...
[05:56] yumoto
    "Menma is just recycled disposable chopsticks."
[05:59] ryu
    Wow, he's an idiot.
[06:01] yumoto
    But it's kinda like disposable chopsticks, isn't it?
[06:04] ryu
    It's just thin and rectangular, right?
[06:05] yumoto
    It's also crisp.
[06:07] ryu
    That doesn't mean it's chopsticks.
[06:09] ryu
    The crispiness comes from the
    bamboo it's made from.
[06:11] yumoto
    There are disposable chopsticks
    made from bamboo, too.
[06:13] ryu
    Are you that determined to
    say menma is chopsticks?
[06:16] yumoto
    What are you saying, Ryuu-senpai?
[06:18] yumoto
    Menma is menma.
[06:19] ryu
    You're the one who brought it up!
[06:21] io
    Anyway, can we talk about why
    Wombat appears to be dead now?
[06:26] yumoto
    I need one cuddle a day!
[06:29] atsu
    I have no idea why that deserves a thumbs up.
[06:31] yumoto
    What? It's the obvious compensation.
[06:34] atsu
    For what?
[06:35] yumoto
    You know, for the fight...
    The Love Busters thing.
[06:39] en
    Oh. Yeah.
[06:41] wombat
    It's not the Love Busters!
    It's the Battle Lovers!
[06:45] wombat
    At least try to remember your own name!
[06:49] en
    Love Battlers, Bust Lovers...
[06:52] en
    They're both embarrassing,
    so what's the difference?
[06:54] wombat
    Battle Lovers is a venerable and noble title!
[06:58] ryu
    Can't be, it's English.
[06:59] io
    At least be consistent about whether
    you're an alien or a foreigner.
[07:01] ryu
    So inconsistent.
[07:04] en
    Plus...
[07:05] en
    These things won't come off.
[07:08] wombat
    They're not "these things"!
    They're Lovracelets!
[07:12] atsu
    Yeah.
[07:13] atsu
    The inability to remember proper names
    means you're getting old, you know.
[07:17] en
    Seriously? Is it bad?
[07:20] io
    It's bad, Yufuin-senpai.
[07:22] io
    Trying to have a conversation on nothing but
    "these things," "those things," and "that thing"
[07:25] io
    definitely means you're getting old.
[07:27] ryu
    So, there's one person here
    who hasn't said a single word,
[07:30] ryu
    let alone a proper name.
[07:36] ryu
    Mr. Tawarayama there.
[07:38] wombat
    No! He'll rot!
[07:41] tawara
    Now you need not worry.
[07:43] all
    No, no, no...
[07:44] ryu
    "Need not" in this day and age...
[07:46] io
    What did you mean, "rot"?
[07:47] wombat
    What I mean is, if I get too far away,
[07:51] wombat
    this body's cellular metabolism will cease and...
[07:54] yumoto
    You mean he's dead?
[07:56] wombat
    In your planet's terms.
[07:59] en
    That's a corpse?
[08:00] atsu
    Dead? So you killed him?
[08:01] ryu
    Murderer!
[08:02] io
    That's a crime.
[08:05] yumoto
    Cold?
[08:06] atsu
    I don't know how you can touch him, Yumoto.
[08:08] yumoto
    Yeah? But he's not that cold!
[08:10] io
    But he's dead!
[08:10] ryu
    Liar!
[08:11] wombat
    Wait a minute.
[08:13] wombat
    This individual is dead, but he is also alive.
[08:17] atsu
    What's with the Schrödinger reference?
[08:19] wombat
    No, it's true!
[08:22] en
    This is starting to annoy me.
[08:24] tawara
    I shall describe my current ability to
    function independently as "difficult."
[08:30] io
    That old man speak is really irritating me.
[08:33] ryu
    You've got our teacher's character all wrong.
[08:35] atsu
    He seriously seems possessed.
[08:37] tawara
    I am currently in stasis,
    but I shall recover shortly.
[08:42] atsu
    Even though you're dead?
[08:43] tawara
    Scientifically advanced medical mechanisms
    are currently at work in my body.
[08:47] tawara
    You need not worry.
[08:49] en
    Easier said than done.
[08:51] wombat
    As long as I am within a certain range,
    his life will not be in danger.
[08:55] wombat
    You know the saying.
[08:56] wombat
    We are "living jointly"!
[08:59] atsu
    I don't know where you pulled that one from...
[09:01] io
    Putting off dealing with problems
    is called the Concorde Effect.
[09:04] io
    It just increases your debt.
[09:06] ryu
    Besides, you can't say you love Earth
    when you killed someone on it.
[09:09] wombat
    There was a reason for that!
[09:11] atsu
    What's the reason?
[09:12] wombat
    It happened the other day,
    just after I arrived on Earth!
[09:16] wombat
    When I was expressing my admiration
[09:19] wombat
    for the generous character and
    clean habits of the people of Earth!
[09:23] atsu
    Does he mean the public bath?
[09:24] yumoto
    It's us!
[09:26] yumoto
    The Kurotama Bath is always open for business!
[09:28] wombat
    But then I was chased around by
    an extremely belligerent individual!
[09:32] yumoto
    Huh? Who was that?
[09:34] yumoto
    Me?!
[09:35] both
    Ah.
[09:37] wombat
    In order to escape his relentless pursuit,
[09:40] wombat
    I had no choice but to run with all my might!
[09:43] wombat
    Help me!
[10:06] en
    You did it, huh?
[10:07] atsu
    You sure did it.
[10:08] io
    You did it, all right.
[10:09] ryu
    Really did it.
[10:12] wombat
    Y-Yes, but...
[10:13] wombat
    Is the responsibility truly mine alone to bear?
[10:17] yumoto
    What? Me?
[10:18] io
    Well, given the force he was
    about to get cuddled with,
[10:22] io
    maybe he was right to run.
[10:24] ryu
    "Sekuhara"? No, you'd call it "anihara," right?
[10:26] atsu
    Animal harassment, yeah.
[10:29] yumoto
    I get it.
[10:31] yumoto
    In that case, Wombat, cuddle me!
[10:34] yumoto
    As much as you like.
[10:35] yumoto
    Do it to your heart's content!
[10:37] wombat
    I refuse!
[10:38] yumoto
    Why?!
[10:39] wombat
    I don't want cuddles, I want you
    to work as the Battle Lovers!
[10:43] wombat
    What I want more than anything
    is for you to love the Earth!
[10:46] yumoto
    But you can just love me!
[10:49] en
    Question.
[10:51] en
    You mean we'll have to put on
    those weird costumes again?
[10:54] atsu
    More than the costumes, I disliked
    those grandiose introductory speeches.
[10:57] ryu
    If it were just the costume...
[10:59] io
    What? "If"? You mean you'd be fine
    if it was just the costume?
[11:02] ryu
    If I think of it as cosplay, it's totally fine.
[11:05] ryu
    We can fire beams, too!
[11:06] io
    Now that you mention it...
[11:08] yumoto
    Well, if my cute li'l Wombat
    asks it of me, I'll take it on!
[11:12] en
    Hold on a minute.
[11:14] en
    Can you really take something
    like this on that easily?
[11:16] atsu
    And how long will we have to do it?
[11:18] wombat
    Until the Earth is filled with love, naturally!
[11:23] en
    You're so creepy.
[11:25] io
    Love? What's that?
[11:27] ryu
    It's like, being happy, right?
[11:29] ryu
    Like me. Or me.
[11:31] io
    Just you, huh, Ryuu?
[11:33] ryu
    I think love is found in the
    trivial, realistic moments.
[11:36] ryu
    Like sharing a can of coffee with a girl,
[11:39] ryu
    or when your shoulders brush
    when the train shakes!
[11:42] io
    I bet I'll feel love when I get
    one billion in my Cayman Islands account.
SIGN    One Billion
[11:46] ryu
    Talk about corrupt!
[11:47] atsu
    It's fine that everyone has
    his own definition of love.
[11:50] atsu
    But are you okay with having
     to wear embarrassing costumes,
[11:53] atsu
    say embarrassing lines,
    and do embarrassing things
[11:55] atsu
    for the foreseeable future?
[11:57] wombat
    I told you, it's nothing
    to be embarrassed about!
[12:00] en
    By the way...
[12:02] en
    Is it okay for you to be away
    from Mr. Tawarayama right now?
[12:06] tawara
    It is fine.
[12:08] en
    Freezing and thawing something over
    and over makes it brittle, y'know?
[12:12] atsu
    You need to take care with perishables.
[12:14] yumoto
    Like sell-by dates.
[12:15] wombat
    I'm sorry!
[12:17] yumoto
    It's okay. I don't mind it so much.
[12:19] four
    You should mind!
SIGN    Yufuin En
    Born July 2nd
    Blood Type B / Cancer
    Hobby: Napping
    Likes: Sleeping in, hot spring manju
SIGN    On sale this week New menu item!
SIGN    Chicken Cutlet Curry Tanmen
[12:32] kusa
    Now then...
[12:34] kusa
    That stench...
[12:36] gero
    What's wrong?
[12:37] ari
    Kinshiro hates curry to death.
SIGN    Hashida Wario
[12:44] hashi
    My name is Hashida Wario.
[12:47] hashi
    I like a world of order and rules.
[12:51] hashi
    The thing I hate most is pi.
[12:53] hashi
    Because it doesn't divide evenly.
[12:55] hashi
    On that note, I also hate
    families with three children.
[12:57] hashi
    When parents and grandparents get
    together for birthdays and Christmas
[13:00] hashi
    and you have seven people sharing a cake...
[13:04] hashi
    It's unbearable.
[13:06] hashi
    It would be better if the
    grandparents would just...
[13:12] zun
    He is the one.
[13:14] kusa
    Why?
[13:15] zun
    His narrow-minded heart that permits
    no compromise will create a raging flame.
[13:20] kusa
    Yes, Lord Zundar.
[13:26] kusa
    Conquest!
[13:33] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
[13:35] kusa
    Aurite!
[13:39] ari
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[13:42] ari
    Argent!
[13:47] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[13:50] gero
    Perlite!
[13:52] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[13:55] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[13:57] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[14:02] kusa
    Aurum!
[14:04] ari
    Argentum!
[14:06] gero
    Perla!
[14:10] trio
    Donum!
[14:33] wari
    That which is not evenly divisible!
[14:34] wari
    That which is warped!
    That which is not equal!
[14:37] wari
    Multiply further!
[14:38] wari
    Warp this world and destroy it!
[14:42] wari
    Asymmetry Beam, fire!
[14:53] guy
    Hey!
[14:54] guy
    Move your hand!
[14:55] guy
    I can't get to the chopsticks!
[14:57] guy
    That's your fault!
[15:04] ari
    Are mismatched chopsticks really
    enough to start a fight like this?
[15:08] gero
    It really is fighting and self-destruction.
[15:10] kusa
    Their own foolishness is to blame.
[15:15] en
    The Lovracelet's reacting,
[15:17] en
    but there's no need for all of us to go, right?
[15:19] en
    I'm taking today off.
[15:21] ryuu
    You mean it, Yufuin-senpai?
[15:23] atsu
    Roger that. If we're short on
    people, we might call you, though.
[15:26] io
    Okay, permission given.
[15:28] wombat
    Hey! Wait just one minute!
[15:31] wombat
    Since ancient times, there have always
    been five heirs to the throne of love!
[15:35] yumoto
    What, really?
[15:36] wombat
    I can't allow you to reduce and
    revert their numbers so lightly!
[15:41] en
    What? Sounds like a pain.
[15:43] wombat
    Why do you think I went to all that trouble
[15:45] wombat
    of thinking up five introductory speeches?!
[15:48] atsu
    What, you thought up those lines?
[15:50] ryuu
    No wonder I thought they had no style.
[15:53] wombat
    But I spent a whole week thinking them up...
[15:56] ryuu
    They have no style.
[15:57] wombat
    You said it twice!
[15:59] yumoto
    Well, I think it's best if all five of us go.
[16:02] wombat
    See? See? See?!
[16:04] en
    How come?
[16:05] yumoto
    Just a feeling, I guess.
[16:06] yumoto
    Or maybe I just like odd numbers
     better than even ones!
[16:11] atsu
    That's a more unintelligible
    reason than I was expecting.
[16:14] yumoto
    And we already went out together once!
[16:16] ryuu
    It's true that it feels more complete that way.
[16:18] io
    And you like that outfit, right, Ryuu?
[16:22] ryuu
    It really does look good on me...
[16:23] wombat
    I don't care! Just, please, get out there!
[16:27] en
    Guess I don't have a choice.
[16:29] en
    Might as well go.
[16:30] wombat
    Then Love Making into the
    Battle Lovers right now!
[16:37] yumoto
    Love Making!
[16:41] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[16:43] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[16:45] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[16:46] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[16:48] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[16:50] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[16:52] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[16:53] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[16:55] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[16:57] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[17:00] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[17:03] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[17:06] io
    Love is all!
[17:08] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[17:10] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:13] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:15] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[17:17] five
    Of love!
[17:20] wari
    Disorderly things!
[17:21] wari
    Inadequate things! Superfluous things!
[17:23] wari
    Destroy them all this instant!
[17:26] yumoto
    Wait!
[17:28] yumoto
    We're gonna defeat you!
[17:29] wari
    What?
[17:30] ryu
    That's too abridged!
[17:31] yumoto
    But we already introduced ourselves before!
[17:34] en
    I want to go home already,
    so let's get this done.
[17:37] io
    That's a careless line no hero should say.
[17:39] io
    You're amazing, Yufuin-senpai.
[17:39] guy
    What the heck?
[17:40] guy
    "Defeat you"?
[17:42] guy
    How embarrassing.
[17:44] yufuin
    They're right to react like that.
[17:46] atsu
    Hey, do they recognize us?
[17:48] wombat
    Worry not!
[17:50] wombat
    Your images and voices have been altered
    to protect your personal information.
SIGN    *Image and voices have been altered to protect privacy
[17:54] en
    They'll still recognize us if we use our real names.
[17:56] en
    For now, I'm Cerulean!
[17:58] en
    Take this!
[18:02] wari
    Hey, that was dangerous!
[18:05] yumoto
    Yu— Cerulean-senpai's really into it!
[18:08] en
    I told you, I want to get home.
[18:10] wari
    Five! An indivisible number!
[18:13] wari
    Then I will erase you!
[18:15] atsu
    What was that?
[18:17] wari
    The world must be beautifully
    symmetrical and even!
[18:20] ryuu
    What are you talking about?
[18:25] ryuu
    You mean, you don't like this kind of thing?
[18:28] wari
    Are you stupid?!
[18:30] wari
    Don't show me that thing!
[18:40] yumoto
    Senpai!
[18:45] yumoto
    What'd you do that for?!
[18:47] wari
    I will destroy warped things
    and incomplete sets!
[18:51] yumoto
    Why?
[18:52] yumoto
    What's wrong with disposable chopsticks?
[18:58] atsu
    The splinters!
[19:00] atsu
    The splinters from the
    chopsticks got Yu— got Scarlet!
[19:03] en
    Those things really hurt.
[19:18] yumoto
    This thing's making rattling noises!
[19:19] wari
    A mass of chopsticks acts as my armor,
[19:23] wari
    rendering your attacks useless!
[19:30] wari
    The finish!
[19:34] yumoto
    If you hate disposable chopsticks that much,
[19:36] yumoto
    don't use them to protect yourself!
[19:40] yumoto
    Just bring your own chopsticks!
[19:43] yumoto
    These irregular chopsticks you're trying to
    destroy have a great purpose behind them!
[19:48] wari
    Purpose?!
[19:50] yumoto
    I'm talking about...
[19:52] yumoto
    A child's rifle!
[19:53] wari
    Ch-Child's rifle?!
[19:56] yumoto
    Can something so cool exist
    in this world? No, it can't!
[19:59] wari
    A rhetorical question?!
[20:02] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[20:10] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[20:13] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[20:15] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[20:18] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[20:20] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[20:35] all
    Love Attack!
[20:49] yumoto
    Your inability to see disposable chopsticks
    as anything but chopsticks was your downfall.
[20:52] yumoto
    Wash your used chopsticks and use them again!
[20:55] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[21:04] wari
    What is this sensation?
[21:06] wari
    Comfort... Healing...
[21:07] wari
    So this is love...
[21:14] hashi
    Eco-friendly...
[21:17] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:19] four
    We told you, it's not!
[21:21] ryuu
    Well, whatever.
[21:24] kusa
    One thing has become very clear.
[21:28] kusa
    They are our enemies.
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:36] gora
    Yumoto. How's the bath?
[21:39] yumoto
    Just perfect, Gora.
[21:41] en
    As I thought, there was no
    need for all five of us.
[21:43] atsu
    Yumoto just handled it all by himself.
    With the force of a storm.
[21:47] ryuu
    I never got to show off.
[21:48] wombat
    Try harder next time.
[21:51] ryuu
    That pisses me off! What's your
    problem, you overgrown rodent?
[21:53] wombat
    I am not a rodent!
[21:56] io
    He's a marsupial.
[21:56] wombat
    What are you saying?!
[21:59] yumoto
    Huh?
[22:00] yumoto
    Will Mr. Tawaramura be okay
    in hot water like this?
[22:04] wombat
    Ah, wait...
[23:41] en
    A pretty boy contest at an all-boys' school?
[23:43] en
    There's something wrong with this place.
[23:45] en
    But the Ballet Club advisor,
    Kurotori, is really pushing for it.
[23:49] en
    Ugh, what a pain.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Feel Love, Narcissus!
[23:50] en
    Next time: Feel Love, Narcissus!
[23:52] en
    Love Making!

Season 1

3 - Feel Love, Narcissus!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Tradition! Binan High School
    Pretty Boy Contest
SIGN    Beautiful, Proper, Pure
SIGN    The 27th of Every Month is Pretty Boy Day
[00:08] kuro
    My name is Kurotori Moteo.
[00:11] kuro
    Advisor to Binan High School's Ballet Club.
[00:13] kuro
    Likes: Being popular.
[00:16] kuro
    Dislikes: Heaviness.
SIGN    Kurotori Moteo
[00:18] kuro
    It carries no weight with the ladies.
[00:19] kuro
    This month, at last...
[00:22] kuro
    I will take the crown of Binan
    High School's #1 Pretty Boy!
[00:40] en
    I saw nothing.
[00:42] atsu
    Let's say we saw nothing.
[00:43] en
    That's just what he wants.
[00:45] yumoto
    How come?
[00:46] yumoto
    You could see Mr. Kurotori's entire—
[00:49] en
    It's fine for you! You're the bath attendant.
[00:52] atsu
    Since it's something we didn't want to see,
[00:55] atsu
    we want to say we didn't see it!
[00:57] yumoto
    Huh? Why didn't you want
    to see Mr. Kurotori's—
[01:01] atsu
    There's no reason!
[01:02] en
    Most people wouldn't want to see that.
[01:04] yumoto
    What's wrong with hanging out naked?
[01:06] yumoto
    I love it. Seeing it and showing it!
[01:10] kuro
    Hello there.
[01:12] kuro
    My sweet honeys.
[01:14] kuro
    Pardon me for going on ahead.
[01:17] atsu
    G-Goodbye.
[01:19] yumoto
    Thanks for coming!
[01:21] kuro
    Spin, spin, spin!
[01:23] kuro
    Spin, spin, spin!
SIGN    Feel Love, Narcissus!
[03:01] en
    Oh? That had to be on purpose, right?
[03:04] atsu
    Yeah.
[03:05] en
    Did you know?
[03:06] en
    They say that hiring him for
    our school was an accident.
[03:11] atsu
    Mr. Kurotori?
[03:12] en
    Yeah. Apparently the principal
    wanted a volleyball club advisor,
[03:17] en
    but he accidentally hired a
    ballet dance club advisor.
[03:21] atsu
    That seems too stupid to be true.
[03:23] en
    But this is a principal who
    holds monthly pretty boy contests
[03:26] en
    even though it's an all-boys' school.
[03:29] atsu
    Now that you mention it,
    I suppose it is possible...
[03:33] en
    But why hold a pretty boy
    contest at an all-boys' school?
[03:36] atsu
    Maybe it's because there are only boys here?
[03:40] ryuu
    Huh? The Ballet Club?
[03:42] kuro
    You are the chosen students.
SIGN    Ballet Club
[03:44] kuro
    Because you both caught my eye.
[03:47] kuro
    Well? Won't you arabesque with me?
[03:52] io
    Is there a financial advantage
    to be gained from this?
[03:55] kuro
    One can expect profits from
    recital entrance fees and,
[03:57] kuro
    if one becomes a star, profits
    from sales of merchandise.
[04:01] io
    Merchandise, eh?
[04:03] ryuu
    How do girls like it?
[04:06] kuro
    It's no exaggeration to say that
    90% of ballet fans are women.
[04:10] kuro
    I await a positive response from you both.
[04:14] gero
    That's the Ballet Club advisor, Kurotori.
[04:17] gero
    He's been pestering me to join, too.
[04:20] kusa
    I heard that his club
    doesn't have a single member.
[04:24] kuso
    If this keeps up, we will be
    forced to shut his club down.
[04:28] ari
    But Kurotori's goal probably isn't
    to gain more club members.
[04:32] ari
    It's to gain more fans.
[04:36] kusa
    Disciples to give him votes
    in the pretty boy contest, eh?
[04:44] io
    In terms of cost-effectiveness,
    the Ballet Club isn't a very good prospect.
[04:47] ryuu
    You decided to calculate it?
[04:49] io
    You never know where you might find gold.
[04:52] io
    Would you ever join the Ballet Club, Ryuu?
[04:55] ryuu
    Nah.
[04:56] ryuu
    He said 90% of ballet fans are girls,
[05:00] ryuu
    but the people around me
    are 100% girls, all the time.
[05:03] ryuu
    So if I did ballet, my ratio
    would actually go down.
[05:05] io
    Even if the ratio went down,
    the overall parameters would go up...
[05:09] io
    But I won't bother talking to you about numbers.
[05:11] ryuu
    Well, all I know is...
[05:13] io
    Money is...
[05:14] ryuu
    Women are...
[05:15] both
    Life!
[05:16] boy
    Zaou-kun, Naruko-kun.
[05:18] boy
    Here are the voting forms
    for the pretty boy contest.
[05:21] boy
    Put them in the voting box as usual.
[05:24] io
    What an annoyance.
    I can't make a single yen off this.
[05:27] ryuu
    And if I don't take #1,
    the girls will throw a fit.
[05:31] gero
    You've never taken #1.
[05:35] ryuu
    What are you looking at?
[05:37] gero
    I could ask you the same.
[05:38] gero
    You can't seem to take your eyes off me.
[05:41] ryuu
    What are you talking about?
[05:48] kuro
    Heading that way, my sweet honey?
[05:51] kuro
    Why not celebrate youth in the Ballet Club?
[05:57] yumoto
    That paper's great!
[05:59] kuro
    Read the reverse side closely, too.
SIGN    Binan High School Pretty Boy Contest
    
    
    Prince of Black Swannie
SIGN    Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori
[06:02] kuro
    Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori.
[06:05] yumoto
    This paper sure is great!
[06:07] kuro
    The paper?
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[06:10] yumoto
    Basketball Club, go!
[06:16] yumoto
    Now, the Ballet Club! Go!
[06:21] yumoto
    Wow!
[06:22] yumoto
    I knew it! The Ballet Club wins by a long shot!
[06:26] io
    He seems to have spent a lot of money
    on good paper for his pamphlets.
[06:30] ryuu
    Lousy taste, though.
[06:32] en
    What are you doing, Yumoto?
[06:34] atsu
    Looks like he's deciding which club to join,
[06:37] atsu
    based on paper airplane distance.
[06:39] wombat
    That's horrible!
[06:40] yumoto
    What is?
[06:41] wombat
    You are already in a club-paparazzi!
[06:44] yumoto
    Huh?
[06:45] wombat
    Our "Defenders of Love Earth Defense Club"!
[06:48] en
    Don't just name it without asking.
[06:50] atsu
    And you're saying
    authoritatively that it's a club?
[06:52] wombat
    I submitted the application with
    Tawarayama-san as the advisor.
[06:56] yumoto
    But monsters don't attack every day.
[06:59] yumoto
    I'm bored.
[07:00] wombat
    That's no reason to two-time me!
[07:03] wombat
    You play with me and cuddle
    me every day, and yet...
[07:06] yumoto
    But you only let me cuddle you once a day.
[07:11] en
    Yumoto really is formidable.
[07:13] ---
    Yeah.
[07:14] ryuu
    Speaking of which, this pretty boy contest...
SIGN    Binan High School Pretty Boy Contest
    
    
    Prince of Black Swannie
SIGN    Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori
[07:17] ryuu
    When is it again?
SIGN    Pretty Boy Day
    27th (bi-nan-shi)
[07:18] io
    Every month on the 27th.
[07:20] io
    "Binanshi" means Pretty Boy Day.
[07:22] en
    Isn't "27" more like "two-na,"
    which makes "Tuna" Day?
[07:25] ryuu
    Not like I care, but the one thing
    I can't stand is losing to that Gero guy.
[07:29] yumoto
    Why is that?
[07:30] en
    Did you actually have a rivalry going?
[07:32] io
    Mildly so.
[07:34] atsu
    Now that you mention it, last month,
    Ryuu and Gero tied for 3rd place.
[07:38] atsu
    With Kusatsu at #1 and Arima at #2.
[07:41] ryuu
    I bet the student council members
    got whole groups to vote for them!
[07:44] ryuu
    The point is, I'm knocking Gero out.
[07:47] en
    Sounds fun.
[07:49] yumoto
    Huh? How so?
[07:50] en
    A battle between the Earth
    Defense Club's "#1 Hustler" Zaou
[07:54] en
    vs. the student council's
    "Chief Narcissist" Gero.
[07:57] atsu
    You're bored too, huh, En-chan?
[07:59] en
    Thus, I call a strategy meeting to
    figure out how to bring Ryuu victory.
[08:02] [SONG] sign
    What is POPULARITY?
[08:03] en
    Here's the topic for debate.
[08:04] atsu
    There? We're starting from there?
[08:07] en
    It's not attractive to achieve
    only superficial popularity.
[08:10] en
    To achieve true popularity,
    one must discover its essence.
[08:14] ryuu
    Is this really going to make me #1?
[08:17] wombat
    I have a question, as well.
[08:19] wombat
    This is an all-boys' school.
[08:21] wombat
    Is it acceptable that "popularity" in
    this case refers to popularity with boys?
[08:25] en
    It is.
[08:26] atsu
    It is?
[08:27] yumoto
    Huh? We're thinking of ways
    to get popular with boys?
[08:31] yumoto
    Putting all our heads together?
[08:33] en
    It's for Ryuu's sake.
[08:34] io
    Even if it won't earn me a single yen,
[08:36] io
    I suppose I must, if it's for Ryuu's sake.
[08:39] yumoto
    Huh? Seriously?
[08:41] yumoto
    If you're gonna be popular, wouldn't
    it be better to be popular with girls?
[08:45] en
    You're so naïve, Yumoto.
[08:47] en
    To be frank, there's no point
    in being popular with girls.
[08:49] yumoto
    Why not?
[08:51] en
    Girls are to be admired.
[08:53] ryuu
    You mean love them,
    rather than be loved by them?
[08:55] atsu
    They do say that men are
    more admiring of manly traits.
[08:59] en
    That's right.
[09:00] en
    They also say that women betray,
    but men do not.
[09:04] io
    Although money is even more loyal.
[09:07] en
    The point is, there's value
    in being a man loved by men!
[09:10] atsu
    He said it outright!
[09:11] yumoto
    Oh! But now that you mention it,
    when I watch yakuza flicks,
[09:15] yumoto
    my heart always flutters at the
    sight of a young gang leader.
[09:18] atsu
    Did you just come out?!
[09:19] en
    Okay. Now that we have the
    definition of popularity,
[09:22] en
    our next subject is "approach."
[09:24] en
    How do you get popular
    with men? Think about it!
[09:26] ---
    Yeah!
[09:28] wombat
    What are they so fired up for?
[09:32] [SONG] sign
    [Requirements to be popular with men]
[09:32] [SONG] sign
    1. Strength
    
    2. Money
    
    3. Brotherliness
[09:33] en
    We've solidified the popularity requirements.
[09:36] atsu
    The #1 requirement
    being strength is realistic.
[09:39] ryuu
    #3 being brotherliness is realistic, too.
[09:42] io
    Money is important, too.
[09:44] wombat
    You got tired of it, did you?
[09:47] yumoto
    Yeah, 'cause I hate thinking.
[09:50] en
    Okay. Let's put our approach
    into practice, and see
[09:55] en
    if it produces results!
[09:56] all
    Yeah!
[09:57] wombat
    Oh, if only they'd be so passionately
    macho about being the Battle Lovers!
[10:11] atsu
    En-chan. Can you do this?
[10:12] atsu
    That guy looks strong.
[10:14] en
    No problem. First...
[10:16] en
    You kill with the eyes!
[10:17] atsu
    Not with strength?
[10:23] atsu
    Ready...
[10:24] atsu
    Go!
[10:28] yumoto
    Senpai! Go over the top!
[10:31] en
    Yeah!
[10:33] en
    Over... the... top!
[10:43] atsu
    Winner: Yufuin!
[10:45] en
    All right!
[10:55] io
    Hey. What do you think of me?
[10:58] boy
    What?
[10:59] io
    I'm asking what you think of me.
[11:01] boy
    Well... Nothing in particular...
[11:03] io
    What about now?
SIGN    Account Balance
[11:12] boy
    I-Incredible!
[11:15] boy
    It's incredible!
[11:17] en
    He's fallen.
[11:18] yumoto
    The power of money is incredible!
SIGN    Class 1-A
[11:28] ryuu
    Working hard?
[11:32] boy
    Can we help you?
[11:34] ryuu
    You're triplets, right?
[11:35] boy
    Yes. As you can see.
[11:37] ryuu
    You want a big brother?
[11:39] trio
    Huh?
[11:40] en
    That came out of nowhere.
[11:41] atsu
    Well, let's watch to the end.
[11:49] ryuu
    You enjoy this cleaning stuff?
[11:52] boy
    We don't enjoy it...
[11:54] boy
    But we're on duty, so...
[11:55] boy
    We have to do it...
[11:57] ryuu
    Then... I'll make it so you can't!
[12:14] trio
    H-Huh?!
[12:17] ryuu
    Now you can't clean, right?
[12:20] ryuu
    It wasn't your fault.
[12:22] ryuu
    Let's hang. Come on.
[12:27] trio
    Big brother!
[12:28] boy
    Big brother!
[12:30] boy
    Let me call you big brother!
[12:32] boy
    Big brother!
[12:34] atsu
    He seized the hearts of the triplets?!
[12:37] yumoto
    Cool!
[12:39] ari
    Those idiots are up to something again.
[12:42] gero
    It's not at all beautiful, is it?
[12:44] kusa
    Things are drifting downwards. Let's go.
SIGN    Kinugawa Atsushi
    Born October 5th
    Blood Type A / Libra
    Hobby: Jigsaw Puzzles
    Likes: Baths, hot springs, curry
SIGN    Mr. Kurotori Rally
[13:01] kuro
    Why? Why did no one come?!
[13:05] kuro
    After I made such a grand showing
    at the arm wrestling tournament...
[13:10] kuro
    If this continues, my position of
    #1 pretty boy in Binan High School
[13:14] kuro
    will once again be taken
    by the student council...
[13:16] kuro
    No, by the dark horse,
    the Earth Defense Club!
[13:21] kuro
    Ah...
[13:22] kuro
    They should all revere me,
    honor me, love me! Why?!
[13:26] kuro
    Why?!
[13:28] zun
    He may be a suitable servant.
[13:31] kusa
    Yes, Lord Zundar.
[13:33] zun
    Go, Caerula Adamas!
[13:40] kusa
    Conquest!
[13:43] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[13:45] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[13:48] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[13:54] kusa
    Aurum!
[13:55] ari
    Argentum!
[13:56] gero
    Perla!
[14:01] trio
    Donum!
SIGN    1579th Pretty Boy Contest
[14:15] boy
    Today's the day to vote
    in the pretty boy contest!
[14:18] boy
    Please cast your pure,
    proper, beautiful votes!
[14:22] en
    We've done all we can.
[14:24] en
    Now we wait for the
    proclamation from on high.
[14:26] atsu
    We have?
[14:29] wrestler
    I'm voting for you.
[14:31] en
    Right.
[14:32] boy
    I'll put in for you, Naruko-kun.
[14:33] io
    Thanks.
[14:34] trio
    Big brother! We're gonna vote for you!
[14:37] ryuu
    Let's play again sometime.
[14:38] trio
    Eee!
[14:40] yumoto
    Big brother.
[14:42] ryuu
    Shut up.
SIGN    Pretty Boy Contest
[14:45] ann
    Now, the man who will
    shine as honored king
[14:49] ann
    of the 1579th Binan High School
    Pretty Boy Contest is...
[14:56] ann
    The name is...
[14:59] monster
    It's me!
[15:02] monster
    Swan! Swan!
[15:05] boy
    What's that thing?!
[15:09] yumoto
    Hey! A monster appeared!
[15:11] ryuu
    Why now, of all times?!
[15:13] io
    I have money riding on this,
    so I'd rather it not be ruined.
[15:16] atsu
    What should we do?
[15:17] en
    What a pain.
[15:18] monster
    Everyone! Love me!
[15:21] monster
    Love Feather Storm!
[15:25] boy
    I love the guy with the black wings!
[15:27] boy
    I love you!
[15:32] yumoto
    Gross!
[15:33] wombat
    Don't freak out! Fight!
[15:36] ryuu
    What was that move, anyway?
[15:38] io
    It's pretty idiotic.
[15:39] atsu
    Part of me wants to applaud
    the opponent's cleverness, but...
[15:44] zun
    You see?
[15:45] zun
    With this plan, we will create
    a world where boys love boys,
[15:48] zun
    thus allowing no one to create any progeny!
[15:51] zun
    Now, the Earth will fall to ruin.
[15:53] zun
    What will you do, Battle Lovers?!
[15:56] wombat
    Hey!
[15:57] wombat
    Would you get to the Love Making already?!
[16:01] yumoto
    That's right! We can Love Making!
[16:03] en
    Oh, we're doing that again?
[16:06] yumoto
    Love Making!
[16:33] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[16:35] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[16:37] en
    Love Making.
[16:48] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[16:49] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[16:52] atsu
    Love Making.
[17:02] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[17:03] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[17:07] oi
    Love Making.
[17:16] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[17:18] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:21] ryuu
    Love Making!
[17:31] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[17:33] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[17:36] monster
    What?!
[17:38] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[17:40] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[17:43] io
    Love is all!
[17:45] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[17:48] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:50] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:52] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[17:55] five
    Of love!
[17:57] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[18:01] monster
    I'm glad to see you, Battle Lovers!
[18:04] yumoto
    What?!
[18:04] monster
    Now, love me to your heart's content!
[18:08] monster
    Love Feather Splash!
[18:11] all
    Ow! Ouch!
[18:16] monster
    Once you've been pierced by
    my love feathers, it's over!
[18:18] monster
    No one can resist loving me!
[18:21] monster
    Come on! Gimme a hug!
[18:24] ryuu
    Damn! I wanna hug it!
[18:26] io
    I'll pay money for it!
[18:27] en
    I want to marry it.
[18:31] atsu
    I can't take it! I'll be right back!
[18:33] ryuu
    He ran off without us!
[18:35] en
    I never realized he was that kind of guy.
[18:41] yumoto
    Wow! You flew, Senpai!
[18:47] atsu
    You, with your beautiful wings...
[18:50] atsu
    Let me show you the love
    that burns within me...
[18:52] ryuu
    Hold it!
[18:54] io
    I've got more money than him!
[18:56] en
    I have marriage on my mind!
[18:58] ryuu
    I love you!
[18:59] io
    I love you!
[18:59] en
    I love you!
[19:00] atsu
    I love you!
[19:03] monster
    That's perfect! More love!
    Offer me all your love!
[19:07] yumoto
    Darn it, these guys!
[19:12] yumoto
    Senpai! You're humiliating yourself!
[19:14] monster
    Don't interfere!
[19:16] monster
    They love me!
[19:18] monster
    Why don't you love me, too?
[19:21] monster
    I hit you with my love feather!
[19:24] yumoto
    I don't understand that kinda thing.
[19:26] monster
    In that case...
[19:28] monster
    What about now?!
[19:33] yumoto
    Why do you want to be loved so badly?
[19:36] monster
    Why...?
[19:38] yumoto
    You've never loved anyone, have you?
[19:41] yumoto
    I think loving feels way
    better than being loved.
[19:45] yumoto
    You can cuddle, and it feels really great!
[19:48] monster
    Cuddle?
[19:50] yumoto
    Yeah, cuddle!
[19:51] yumoto
    And if there's no one you love right now,
[19:53] yumoto
    you should try cuddling yourself!
[19:56] yumoto
    It feels great!
[19:58] en
    What is he talking about?
[20:00] atsu
    I don't know, but it's very passionate.
[20:03] yumoto
    Before you try to get anyone to love you,
[20:06] yumoto
    try loving yourself first.
[20:08] en
    Is now... our chance?
[20:10] atsu
    Now!
[20:12] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[20:15] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[20:17] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[20:20] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[20:22] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[20:37] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[20:49] monster
    How could I not realize
    something so important?!
[20:52] monster
    He's right! How can you live
    without loving yourself?
[20:56] monster
    The one you should love... is yourself!
[20:59] yumoto
    That's right!
[21:00] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[21:08] monster
    I love me!
[21:16] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:18] yumoto
    The monster was Mr. Kurotori?
[21:22] ryuu
    He looks happy, though.
[21:25] io
    Yes, he looks comfortable.
[21:28] en
    I'm tired.
[21:34] ari
    We lost again.
[21:35] gero
    The Battle Lovers... Just who are they?
[21:39] kusa
    We will surely have them grovel at our feet.
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:49] gora
    Yumoto. How's the water today?
[21:53] yumoto
    Perfect again today, Gora.
[21:57] en
    Hey, random question.
[21:59] en
    Which part do you guys wash first?
[22:02] atsu
    My neck, I guess?
[22:03] yumoto
    My arms!
[22:04] ryuu
    Armpits.
[22:05] io
    The nape of the neck.
[23:40] atsu
    That reminds me. When we
    were in elementary school,
[23:42] atsu
    we went to see a meteor shower.
[23:44] atsu
    I wish we could be kids again.
[23:46] atsu
    Wait, we are kids again!
[23:48] atsu
    Could a monster be behind this?
[23:50] atsu
    Next time: Cute Little
    Boys of Love and Youth.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth
[23:53] atsu
    Love Making!

Season 1

4 - Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:10] atsu
    Hey, there's one!
[00:13] kusa
    There's another!
[00:15] atsu
    Meteor showers are cool, huh?
[00:17] kusa
    Yeah.
[00:22] atsu
    Hey. My big sister said that
[00:24] atsu
    if you make a wish three times
    before a shooting star disappears,
[00:28] atsu
    it'll come true.
[00:30] kusa
    Isn't that just superstition?
[00:31] atsu
    You think so?
[00:33] atsu
    But my sister really believes it.
[00:39] kusa
    What did you say?
[00:45] kusa
    That's so childish.
[00:46] atsu
    But I am a child.
[00:52] atsu
    I thought you didn't believe it, Kin-chan.
[00:54] kusa
    Just thought I'd try.
[00:56] atsu
    What did you wish for?
[00:59] kusa
    I wished for...
[01:00] gero
    Kusatsu-san.
[01:03] ari
    So this is where you were.
[01:05] gero
    What are you doing here with all the lights out?
[01:08] kusa
    Looking at the stars.
[01:10] gero
    Stars?
[01:11] kusa
    Yes. Shooting stars.
[01:14] ari
    Shooting stars? Wishing on a star, eh?
[01:17] ari
    I didn't know you were such a romantic, Kinshiro.
[01:22] gero
    So, what did you wish for?
[01:25] kusa
    I wished for...
[01:28] kusa
    World domination, of course.
SIGN    Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth
[03:09] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[03:10] wom
    S-Stop it! Stop it, stop it!
[03:14] yumoto
    But you stink.
[03:15] yumoto
    What's it called? Animal stink?
[03:17] wom
    But washing me like this...
[03:20] yumoto
    When you stink,
[03:21] yumoto
    after I cuddle you, people tell me I stink!
[03:26] wom
    I don't stink! You're the ones who—
[03:29] yumoto
    Huh? We're the ones who stink?
[03:34] yumoto
    What kind of stink?
[03:34] wom
    Human...
[03:36] yumoto
    Human stink?
[03:37] wom
    Yes!
[03:38] yumoto
    Oh, really?
[03:40] yumoto
    Do wombats have a sharp sense of smell?
[03:44] wom
    I just happen to resemble your Earth animal.
[03:47] wom
    I am not an actual wombat!
[03:51] yumoto
    Then what are you?
[03:51] wom
    I am wfirocbx...
[03:53] yumoto
    Wfiro...?
[03:54] wom
    Xjudsu...
[03:56] yumoto
    Huh? Ikuju...
[03:58] yumoto
    Oh, whatever! Let's just go with Wom-san!
[04:03] yumoto
    Don't run away!
[04:04] wom
    Made it!
[04:08] atsu
    Give it a break already, Yumoto.
[04:10] atsu
    You're just like a child.
[04:13] en
    Well, in Yumoto's case,
    it's not just his behavior.
[04:16] en
    He looks like a kid, too.
[04:18] yumoto
    What's wrong with that?
    That means I look young, right?
[04:21] en
    Young? You've got to be kidding.
[04:23] en
    We're in high school, you little kid.
[04:25] yumoto
    Please stop calling me a kid.
[04:28] atsu
    Okay, Yumoto-kun,
    what's your dream for the future?
[04:31] yumoto
    To be a superhero!
[04:32] en
    See? A kid.
[04:34] en
    Hey, everyone! There's a kid in here!
[04:37] atsu
    Besides, we're already superheroes.
[04:39] atsu
    Though we didn't ask to be...
[04:41] yumoto
    Oh, that's right.
[04:44] tawara
    Well, I will be taking my leave ahead of you.
[04:48] yumoto
    Hey, I'm not done yet.
[04:50] tawara
    Pardon.
[04:52] io
    You're not just young.
    You really are a child, Yumoto.
[04:56] io
    Do you still pay the
    child fare to ride the bus?
[05:02] io
    I'm so jealous. You don't
    have to spend as much money.
[05:05] yumoto
    You got me, huh?
[05:07] yumoto
    Just kidding!
[05:08] io
    That's the kind of thing
    that makes you a kid.
[05:15] ryuu
    Anyway, you need more than
    just youth on your side.
[05:18] ryuu
    You need to channel that into appeal.
[05:20] en
    If you ask me, I'd say you're
    pretty childish yourself, Ryuu.
[05:24] ryuu
    Oh, Yufuin-senpai, you don't know my true power.
[05:28] en
    What true power?
[05:29] ryuu
    From married women to
    elementary school girls—
[05:31] yumoto
    You can't beat me in video games!
[05:33] io
    You be quiet!
[05:36] yumoto
    Okay...
[05:39] en
    If we were in the samurai ages,
[05:42] en
    we would have had our coming of age
    ceremony and be full-fledged adults by now.
[05:45] en
    Your looks don't determine
    whether you're actually young.
[05:48] ryuu
    That's a senior for you. You're so mature.
[05:51] en
    Senior?
[05:52] atsu
    Well, senior can refer to an
    older person or an upperclassman.
[05:56] ryuu
    That's right, Senior-senpai.
[05:59] en
    I feel like he just called me an old man.
[06:02] en
    Does my face really look that old?
[06:04] io
    It means that your appearance
    and behavior are both mature.
[06:07] atsu
    Being called mature is a compliment, right?
[06:10] atsu
    That's why, in the samurai ages,
    they'd shave off their forelocks
[06:13] [SONG] atsu
    and make themselves intentionally bald.
SIGN    °This is his individual opinion about forelock-shaving.
[06:15] [SONG] io
    Oh? Was that artificial baldness?
[06:18] [SONG] atsu
    Yes, they thought being bald
    made you look more adult.
[06:21] yumoto
    So if I shaved myself bald,
    people might not call me a kid?
[06:24] io
    No, it would just look like a miso commercial.
[06:27] yumoto
    What does that mean?
[06:30] en
    Does my face look old?
[06:32] atsu
    En-chan, are you really worried about that?
[06:34] en
    Maybe so... Does my face look old?
[06:39] ryuu
    Being young is a wonderful thing!
[06:41] yumoto
    Me too! Me too!
[06:48] io
    What is that?
[06:50] io
    You don't understand at all.
[06:55] en
    My inner calm reflects itself on my face.
[07:00] atsu
    He's so worried about it.
[07:11] yumoto
    I'm sorry, Mister. Were we being too loud?
[07:17] atsu
    Hey, Yumoto.
[07:18] en
    He's not an older man.
[07:21] en
    He wasn't wearing his uniform,
[07:24] en
    so I thought he was just some older guy, too.
[07:26] en
    But I just now realized...
[07:28] atsu
    He's a student at our high school.
[07:31] atsu
    They call him "the guy with
    the face of a 50-year-old."
SIGN    Igarao Oyaji
[07:37] atsu
    Igarao Oyaji!
[07:43] oyaji
    Damn it. I'm not an old man.
[07:45] kid
    Sir, good morning.
[07:46] oyaji
    When I go to school,
    they confuse me for a teacher.
[07:48] kid
    Go ahead!
[07:49] oyaji
    When I ride the train,
    people give up their seats for me.
[07:51] kid
    What's with that old guy?
[07:52] oyaji
    I didn't choose to be born
    with a face like this.
[07:55] oyaji
    I want to enjoy my youth like
    a high school student, too.
[07:59] oyaji
    I'm not an old man. I'm not an old man.
[08:02] oyaji
    I'm not an old man!
[08:07] ari
    He's our next target, eh?
[08:10] gero
    I see. I feel powerful dark energy from him.
[08:14] kusa
    His age complex will likely create
    a powerful negative field.
[08:21] zun
    Then let us go.
[08:23] kusa
    Conquest!
[08:26] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[08:29] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[08:31] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[08:36] trio
    Donum!
[09:01] yumoto
    Good morning, Gora!
[09:03] gora
    Oh, you're up early, Yumoto.
[09:04] yumoto
    Yeah, I've got club stuff.
[09:07] gora
    You do club stuff? Morning training?
[09:10] yumoto
    Morning cuddles!
[09:12] gora
    Morning cuddles?
[09:13] yumoto
    Yeah, morning cuddles.
[09:15] yumoto
    Thanks for the lunch, as usual!
[09:17] gora
    Sorry it's rice balls again.
[09:19] yumoto
    Nah, your rice balls are
    the best in the world!
[09:34] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[09:37] atsu
    How long are you going to do that?
[09:39] atsu
    I can't believe you don't get tired of it.
[09:40] yumoto
    But it's fun.
[09:43] io
    Why not put that effort into a part-time job?
[09:46] io
    You could make a lot of money.
[09:47] yumoto
    That's not fun.
[09:49] ryuu
    Why not pick up girls?
[09:51] yumoto
    No interest in that.
[09:53] en
    Does my face really look that old?
[09:55] atsu
    Hey, are you still stuck on that, En-chan?
[09:57] en
    But that was the first time in my life
    I've been told my face looks old.
[10:01] en
    People had only described me
    as "hot" or "gorgeous" before.
[10:05] atsu
    I've never heard that...
[10:07] io
    Isn't that normal for an 18-year-old boy?
[10:10] io
    Isn't it people like Yumoto and
    Ryuu who are the exception?
[10:13] ryuu
    Don't lump me in with Yumoto.
[10:15] ryuu
    I'm cute! He's a kid.
[10:18] yumoto
    You called?
[10:22] atsu
    No, no. That's not true.
[10:24] atsu
    Having a face that looks old
    is like, for example,
[10:26] atsu
    the husband in that anime who has
    a coworker with really prominent lips,
[10:30] atsu
    but it turns out he's really 27.
[10:32] en
    Why are you talking about a nationally
    famous anime all of a sudden?
[10:36] en
    Why are you associating me,
    an 18-year-old, with that character who's 27?
[10:40] atsu
    Well, um, um...
[10:43] atsu
    The savior of the century's end
    with seven stars on his chest,
[10:45] atsu
    the cynical #2 of the Science Ninja Team,
[10:49] atsu
    and the protagonist's dark-skinned friend
[10:50] atsu
    voiced by Iizuka Shouzou
    in that robot war story
[10:52] atsu
    are all 18, too.
[10:54] atsu
    But you look much younger than them!
[10:56] en
    Why is this turning into even
    more of an anime superfan discussion?
[10:59] en
    And why is Iizuka Shouzou-san
    the only person you named outright?
[11:03] ryuu
    What are they talking about?
[11:05] io
    No idea.
[11:06] yumoto
    I like unagi more than anago!
[11:09] wombat
    Now's my chance!
[11:15] yumoto
    Hey, wait!
SIGN    Zaou Ryuu
    Born March 13th
    Blood Type B / Pisces
    Hobby: Snowboarding
    Likes: Girls, cherries
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[11:38] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[11:40] yumoto
    Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
[11:42] en
    Stop it, Yumoto! What are you doing?
[11:44] yumoto
    Well, Wom-san ran away, so...
[11:48] en
    Cut it out! Why me, then?
[11:49] atsu
    He really is a kid.
[11:50] io
    Such an unproductive endeavor
    won't earn you a single yen, you know.
[11:54] ryuu
    There's nothing fun about
    two men fooling around.
[11:58] yumoto
    Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
[12:00] atsu
    What is this?
[12:02] atsu
    I'm getting an irresistible urge to tickle En-chan.
[12:08] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[12:09] en
    Why you now?
[12:11] atsu
    Well, it just looked so fun! Woosh, woosh!
[12:14] io
    Senpai, what are you doing?
[12:16] io
    Actually, I want to do it, too!
[12:19] io
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[12:19] ryuu
    What are you doing, Io?
[12:22] ryuu
    Damn! I'm getting revenge!
[12:25] en
    Then I'll get revenge, too!
[12:28] atsu
    Turning the tables is no fair!
[12:37] yumoto
    Hey, doesn't something seem weird?
[12:39] en
    Like what?
[12:40] atsu
    Now that you mention it, why are we
    acting like elementary schoolers?
[12:43] io
    I just got the urge to do it.
[12:46] yumoto
    It's almost like we've turned
    into elementary schoolers.
[12:49] yumoto
    Yeah, 'cause we have turned
    into elementary schoolers!
[12:53] all
    What's going on here?!
[12:55] wombat
    Terrible news! An enemy's appeared!
[13:03] en
    Wh-What's all this?
[13:09] atsu
    What's going on?
[13:11] io
    The students have all become children.
[13:14] ryuu
    Darn it! I had a date after this!
[13:16] en
    That's what bothers you?
[13:17] yumoto
    Yay! Yay! This is kinda fun!
[13:20] en
    He's the only one who doesn't
    seem to have changed much.
[13:23] all
    Yeah.
[13:24] en
    You think this is the
    work of an enemy monster?
[13:27] yumoto
    Hey! Look at that!
[13:38] monster
    Become young again! Become young again!
[13:44] en
    Is that monster's power
    turning everyone into children?
[13:47] wombat
    Everyone! Time for Love Making!
[13:49] all
    Right!
[13:50] yumoto
    Love Making!
[13:54] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[13:56] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[13:58] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[13:59] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[14:01] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[14:02] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[14:05] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[14:06] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[14:08] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[14:10] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[14:12] yumoto
    We are...
[14:13] yumoto
    Wait, what's up with this?!
[14:16] atsu
    That's weird. Why's it so baggy?
[14:19] en
    Our other clothes changed to child sizes.
[14:22] io
    This setup is lacking consistency.
[14:24] ryu
    And I really liked my costume, too.
[14:28] io
    You like that thing?
[14:31] monster
    Who are you people?
[14:34] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[14:37] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[14:40] io
    Love is all!
[14:41] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[14:44] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[14:47] five
    Battle Lovers!
[14:49] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[14:52] five
    Of love!
[14:55] yumoto
    You monster! We're gonna fight you!
[14:58] monster
    Battle Lovers? We'll see about that.
[15:01] yumoto
    What was that?
[15:03] yumoto
    Take this!
[15:04] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[15:09] yumoto
    Huh? Why?
[15:10] atsu
    Has our power been halved
    because we're children?
[15:14] io
    It's the child rate?
[15:16] monster
    Then allow me to take the lead.
[15:38] monster
    What's wrong, Battle Lovers?
[15:40] monster
    These baggy clothes are hard to move in.
[15:42] ryuu
    Damn.
[15:44] ryuu
    I hate looking so uncool.
[15:46] io
    That's what bothers you?
[15:49] monster
    How unsightly.
[15:51] yumoto
    Damn it...
[15:53] monster
    Fall to ruin, Battle Lovers!
[16:02] atsu
    Hey, all we're doing is saying "wah!"
[16:05] monster
    Fall to ruin! Fall to ruin, all of you!
[16:08] monster
    This is your punishment for treating me
    like an old man based on the way I look!
[16:12] yumoto
    What did he say?
[16:14] atsu
    Is it possible he's...
[16:15] en
    "The guy with the face of a 50-year old"...
[16:17] en
    Igarao Oyaji!
[16:19] monster
    Don't call me by that nickname!
[16:29] monster
    Then I'll make you even younger.
[16:42] en
    What's going on?
[16:44] atsu
    I can't move!
[16:45] io
    It appears we've turned into
    kindergarteners this time.
[16:49] ryuu
    What was that?
[16:51] monster
    You literally can't raise a hand against me.
[16:54] yumoto
    Darn you, darn you, darn you.
[16:56] yumoto
    Oh, it undid our transformation.
[16:59] en
    Undid? Or disrobed?
[17:02] atsu
    "Disrobed our transformation"
    doesn't sound right for the genre.
[17:06] io
    This is very embarrassing.
[17:09] ryuu
    I'm not embarrassed, but I won't
    forgive you for making that smaller.
[17:14] monster
    At this stage, you're effectively babies.
[17:16] monster
    No, you are babies.
[17:19] monster
    Then I'll send you to hell,
    as easy as taking candy from a baby!
[17:27] en
    Damn... At this rate...
[17:29] atsu
    Are we done for?
[17:33] io
    If I'd known this was going to happen,
    I would have spent all my savings.
[17:37] ryuu
    The women of the world will lament this.
[17:44] yumoto
    Wait a minute.
[17:46] en
    What is it at a time like this?
[17:48] yumoto
    Something's weird.
[17:49] atsu
    Weird?
[17:50] yumoto
    The setup here is that everyone's turning
    young because of him, right?
[17:54] io
    That's right. So?
[17:56] yumoto
    Then it really is weird.
[17:58] ryuu
    What's weird?
[18:00] yumoto
    Well, if that's the old man high school student,
[18:03] yumoto
    he wouldn't look like that,
    even if he turned young.
[18:07] ryuu
    I get it. Even young,
    someone who's ugly is still ugly.
[18:11] en
    He'd never become a pretty young boy.
[18:14] atsu
    Which means this is...
[18:15] yumoto
    An illusion!
[18:17] monster
    Oh, no!
[18:20] yumoto
    Now!
[18:31] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[18:37] monster
    What?!
[18:51] yumoto
    You're not really an old man.
[18:54] yumoto
    You're an 18-year-old high school student.
[18:57] yumoto
    Isn't it the resentment you feel that's
    really turning you into an old man?
[19:03] atsu
    That all sounds impressive,
    but it's not really fixing anything.
[19:07] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[19:16] monster
    What is this strange sensation?
[19:19] monster
    Comfort... healing...
[19:21] monster
    I see... So this is love.
[19:29] yumoto
    Love is over!
[19:31] io
    We're back to normal!
[19:37] yumoto
    Well, let's all put this
    behind us and have a bath!
[19:41] yumoto
    We're naked anyway!
[19:42] en
    Speaking of which, where'd our clothes go?
[19:44] yumoto
    Let's go!
[19:48] ari
    Accursed Battle Lovers.
[19:51] gero
    They foiled us yet again.
[19:53] zun
    It appears we failed once more.
[19:56] kusa
    Lord Zundar, I am sorry.
[19:59] zun
    No matter.
[20:01] zun
    Let them bask in their overconfidence for now.
[20:05] kusa
    Next time, I swear...
[20:07] zun
    I'll be counting on you.
[20:09] kusa
    Sir.
[20:10] ari
    But I thought this plan to turn the enemy
    into elementary schoolers to seal their power
[20:15] ari
    would work out well.
[20:18] kusa
    Elementary schoolers, huh?
[20:20] gero
    Is something wrong?
[20:22] kusa
    No... It's nothing.
[20:26] kusa
    Just remembering something from long ago.
[20:33] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[20:36] en
    Enough of that, Yumoto.
[20:38] en
    He really is a kid.
[20:40] atsu
    Well, he's the only one who didn't change
    at all when the enemy made us young.
[20:44] en
    No matter how young you
    make the kid, a kid is still a kid.
[20:52] ryuu
    Oh, no!
[20:53] io
    Don't worry. The shield function made
    it so he wouldn't recognize our faces.
[20:56] ryuu
    Oh, that's right.
[21:03] atsu
    You seem to be in a good mood.
[21:05] en
    Did something good happen to you?
[21:08] oyaji
    Well, actually, I got a girlfriend.
[21:13] ryuu
    Oh, does she like older men?
[21:14] io
    Hey!
[21:15] oyaji
    That's right.
[21:17] oyaji
    She says they're wonderfully reliable.
[21:22] oyaji
    She said she made a wish on
    a star to meet a wonderful man.
[21:28] io
    I see...
[21:30] atsu
    You heard him.
[21:31] en
    Why are you telling me that?
[21:32] ryuu
    I'm glad to hear it,
    though it's also kind of annoying.
[21:36] oyaji
    Yes!
[21:39] en
    What is it?
[21:40] atsu
    He reminded me that I made a wish
    on a shooting star when I was little.
[21:44] en
    What was it?
[21:45] atsu
    To be a superhero.
[21:47] en
    Just like a kid.
[21:49] atsu
    Well, I was a kid.
[21:51] en
    You can't say anything about Yumoto.
[21:54] atsu
    That reminds me.
[21:55] atsu
    What did he wish for then, I wonder?
[21:59] yumoto
    Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
[22:02] wombat
    Please stop...
[22:07] wombat
    Ma-Ma-Macho...
[23:40] ryuu
    For some reason, the Press Society guys
    are hanging around the Defense Club.
[23:44] ryuu
    They muscle in on my calls to girls.
    It's beyond annoying!
[23:48] ryuu
    Remote control? I'll buy you one of those!
[23:50] ryuu
    Next time: To Steal Love Without Regret.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    To Steal Love Without Regret
[23:52] ryuu
    Love Making!

Season 1

5 - To Steal Love Without Regret

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] kino
    There's a mysterious cosplay group
    causing a ruckus around the school lately...
[00:08] kino
    Their identities aren't visible
    to the naked eye or in pictures.
[00:13] kino
    This could be interesting material.
SIGN    To Steal Love Without Regret
[02:08] en
    Raining again today?
[02:11] atsu
    It is the rainy season, after all.
[02:13] en
    It's hard to be enthusiastic when it's raining.
[02:16] atsu
    About what?
[02:17] en
    Active and aggressive things.
[02:20] atsu
    In all the time I've known you,
[02:22] atsu
    I've never seen you do anything
    active and aggressive.
[02:26] en
    Really?
[02:27] atsu
    The Yufuin En I know is
    always passive and defensive.
[02:31] en
    That's my Atsushi.
    He's got the English skills.
[02:35] io
    Apparently, "naïve" and "sensitive"
[02:37] io
    are not considered compliments
    in the English-speaking world.
[02:40] ryuu
    People say stuff like
    "a naïve young man," though.
[02:42] atsu
    Over there, that means "a careless young man."
[02:46] io
    Exactly!
[02:48] ryuu
    Why are you looking at me?
[02:50] io
    It just seemed appropriate.
[02:51] ryuu
    Io, I am not a careless young man.
[02:55] ryuu
    I am a guileless young man.
[02:57] io
    You have a wonderfully high opinion of yourself.
[03:01] en
    Totally losing my motivation...
[03:02] atsu
    I'm telling you, you never had any.
[03:10] en
    Yumoto?
[03:13] atsu
    Were your pupils dilated just now?
[03:16] yumoto
    Something about touching Wom-san
    takes me closer to Nirvana.
[03:22] en
    Like Linus's blanket?
[03:24] atsu
    Oh, yeah, like a feeling of security?
[03:26] yumoto
    It's a little different from security.
[03:29] en
    Then what is it?
[03:30] yumoto
    What, indeed?
[03:32] en
    You're asking me?
[03:33] wom
    I say "no thank you" to being cuddled for no reason!
[03:36] yumoto
    Don't say that!
[03:37] yumoto
    Unhand me, you!
[03:39] wom
    Let me cuddle you!
[03:41] wom
    Day after day after day,
    you've cuddled me so much,
[03:44] wom
    the fur around my stomach is thinning out!
[03:47] yumoto
    Then I'll do your back from now on!
[03:49] wom
    That is not the issue!
[03:52] io
    Does it absolutely have to be Wombat?
[03:54] io
    Could it be something else?
[03:55] yumoto
    Hmm! Good question!
[03:58] yumoto
    Something about his cuddliness
    is just right to me.
[04:02] yumoto
    Gives me that "feel so fine" feeling!
[04:04] io
    What if he were some other kind of fluffy?
[04:06] yumoto
    I'd consider it.
[04:08] io
    Floofy?
[04:09] yumoto
    Absolutely!
[04:11] io
    Fuzzy?
[04:12] yumoto
    That would be fine.
[04:13] io
    Like that over there?
[04:15] yumoto
    Oh, that's good!
[04:18] yumoto
    Wait, that's...
[04:21] trio
    Mr. Tawarayama!
[04:23] ryuu
    What is all this?
[04:24] atsu
    Mold? Is it mold? It's mold!
[04:26] en
    Hey, hey, hey!
[04:28] en
    Cut it out!
[04:30] ryuu
    Wombat, what happened
    to your advanced science?
[04:33] wombat
    I'm sorry!
[04:34] wombat
    The high temperature and humidity lately
[04:37] wombat
    have created favorable
    conditions for mold growth!
[04:39] io
    "Favorable"? It's utterly putrid.
[04:42] wom
    It's fine! Get rid of the mold and
    the main body will still be fine!
[04:47] io
    The hyphae of mold go down
    deeper than you'd think.
[04:50] yumoto
    One time, I picked the mold off some
    bread and ate it, and I got sick!
[04:53] ryuu
    Are you stupid?
[04:54] yumoto
    I was hungry!
[04:56] atsu
    Anyway, it's bad that he's growing mold, isn't it?
[04:59] yumoto
    Let's wash him! Let's wash him!
[05:00] yumoto
    Everything turns out okay after a washing!
[05:05] yumoto
    What's this? What color is this?
[05:07] atsu
    Wombat, you have to be more
    careful with Mr. Tawarayama.
[05:11] en
    Yeah, there's no love in this.
[05:13] wombat
    You say that I, who came here to fill
    the Earth with love, have no love?!
[05:17] ryuu
    Nope, none.
[05:18] io
    Crude in every way.
[05:19] yumoto
    Upsy-daisy!
[05:23] en
    Hey. He fell.
[05:25] yumoto
    There, it turned out okay!
[05:27] four
    It did not!
[05:28] ryuu
    If anyone saw this,
    they'd say it was elder abuse!
[05:31] io
    Assault, right?
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[05:32] yumoto
    He just looks that way because
    he's wet. If we dry him off...
[05:37] en
    I thought I just heard a knock.
[05:40] ryuu
    But no one's ever visited us before.
[05:43] atsu
    Either way, this situation clearly looks bad!
[05:46] io
    All Hell's gonna break loose, yeah.
[05:50] kino
    Pardon me!
[05:53] yumoto
    Man, he sure is persistent!
[05:55] en
    Hey!
[05:58] yumoto
    Who's there? What do you want?
[06:00] kino
    Oh, how rude of me.
[06:02] kino
    I am Kinosaki of the PS.
[06:05] yumoto
    PS?
[06:07] kino
    The Press Society.
[06:09] kino
    This is my photographer, Tazawa.
[06:11] taz
    Hey.
SIGN    Binan High School
    Press Society
    Kinosaki Kou
[06:12] kino
    A pleasure to make your acquaintance.
[06:14] atsu
    And what do two members of
    the Press Society want with us?
[06:17] kino
    How rude of me.
[06:18] kino
    The truth is, I publish online articles
    for the Binan High School Press Society
[06:22] kino
    about daily life on campus.
[06:27] atsu
    Online?
[06:28] kino
    The other day at a meeting,
    I proposed a new project:
[06:31] kino
    could we make a theme out of the
    "bonds" between distinctive teachers
[06:34] kino
    and the students around them?
[06:37] kino
    I call it "Beloved Teachers"!
[06:40] kino
    Well? Don't you think it's a great project?
[06:43] all
    Yeah...
[06:44] kino
    Thank you for the words of praise.
[06:47] kino
    A flower of compassion blooming
    quietly in the wild concrete jungle...
[06:51] kino
    The bond between student and
    teacher is the most precious of all!
[06:55] kino
    "My teacher!" "My class!"
[06:57] kino
    Souls crying out to each other!
[06:59] kino
    A miraculous meeting!
[07:00] yumoto
    This guy's weird.
[07:02] en
    You're one to talk.
[07:04] kino
    Don't let it worry you.
[07:05] kino
    The press is often misunderstood.
[07:08] kino
    But to root out the truth and
    convey it in elaborate, minute detail...
[07:14] kino
    I believe that is our mission.
[07:19] ryuu
    Hey, what are you doing?
[07:20] io
    I refuse to have my picture taken.
[07:22] kino
    No, I just received your consent to be covered.
[07:26] kino
    I thought we'd get started right away.
[07:28] ryuu
    Covered?
[07:29] io
    Consent?
[07:30] atsu
    Who gave it?
[07:31] kino
    Oh, honestly!
[07:32] kino
    Right now, you just said it
    was a good project, didn't you?
[07:36] kino
    Now, let's get right to the
    interview wth Mr. Tawarayama!
[07:41] kino
    Mr. Tawarayama, from all that I've just seen,
[07:45] kino
    you seem to enjoy a very frank
    relationship with your students.
[07:49] en
    What you've just seen?
[07:50] kino
    Yes.
[07:51] kino
    I was below when I caught sight of
    the fun you were having by the window.
[07:57] kino
    Mr. Tawarayama, you seem truly
    energetic for a man of your age.
[08:02] kino
    Please, tell us the secret of
    your health and agile movements.
[08:08] kino
    Mr. Tawarayama?
[08:10] en
    We decline this interview.
[08:13] atsu
    We're a boring club.
    No one's going to find it interesting.
[08:15] kino
    No, no.
[08:16] kino
    It is the users who will determine
    what's interesting and what's not.
[08:20] io
    Please leave.
[08:22] ryuu
    If you don't...
[08:23] kino
    Um, you can refuse if you want to, but...
[08:26] kino
    I have a little something
    called freedom of the press.
[08:29] kino
    So I'm going to gather material
    without hesitation. Okay?
[08:35] io
    It's a violation of our likeness usage rights.
[08:38] io
    Nowadays, you have to be very careful
[08:40] io
    about how you use personal information.
[08:42] kino
    Yes. That's why I thought it would be
    beneficial for you to use us, as well.
[08:48] kino
    Let's make it a win-win situation!
[08:54] wom
    Oh, dear...
[09:00] kino
    Good morning, Yufuin-san!
[09:02] kino
    It seems we're finally getting a bit of
    a break from the rainy season, eh?
[09:06] kino
    Are you feeling well, Yufuin-san?
[09:09] kino
    Come to think of it,
    I don't see Kinugawa-san around.
[09:12] kino
    Are you all alone, Yufuin-san?
[09:14] en
    Atsushi has day duty.
[09:15] en
    So what do you want?
[09:17] kino
    How rude of me.
[09:19] kino
    I'm here for your morning
    greeting and interview.
[09:22] en
    Interview?
[09:23] kino
    Yes. Yufuin En-san, what are your hobbies?
[09:27] en
    Hobbies? None, really.
[09:29] kino
    Special skills?
[09:31] en
    Special skills? None, really.
[09:32] kino
    He says he has no real skills.
[09:35] en
    Uh, I don't like you putting it that way...
[09:37] kino
    Favorite foods?
[09:39] en
    Well, none really.
[09:40] kino
    He has no favorite foods.
[09:41] en
    Look, I told you...
[09:42] kino
    You're not giving me much of an interview.
[09:45] en
    Well, you can't just ask me
    this stuff out of the blue.
[09:48] en
    Give me some questions
    that are easier to answer.
[09:51] kino
    Questions that are easier to answer?
[09:53] kino
    Let me see...
[09:55] kino
    If you suddenly became a superhero
    tasked with protecting the Earth,
[09:58] kino
    what would you do?
[10:01] kino
    Well, it's a purely hypothetical question.
[10:03] kino
    What would you do if something
    like that were to happen?
[10:08] kino
    Are you the type that would find
    it bothersome? Or would you...
[10:14] kino
    That pose... Discomfort? Despair?!
[10:17] io
    It's the rage, fury, and indignation
    over a failed FX transaction!
[10:21] ryuu
    You're so stupid.
[10:23] ryuu
    Don't cry. I hate women who cry.
[10:26] kino
    Even if he became a superhero,
    he'd hate women who cry, he says.
[10:30] ryuu
    I can buy you a remote control, at least.
[10:32] ryuu
    Huh? Are remote controls that expensive?
[10:35] ryuu
    Then just do it by hand.
[10:38] kino
    It's tough when you can't
    change from hot air to cold.
[10:42] ryuu
    Why can't you just put it
    on an automatic setting?
[10:44] kino
    Carefully adjusting your settings is better
    for the environment, don't you think?
[10:48] ryuu
    Shut up!
[10:50] ryuu
    Hello? Hello?
[10:53] kino
    Your defense of romance failed, I see.
[10:55] ryuu
    Save it!
[10:57] atsu
    What is that?
[10:59] atsu
    Like part of a "ten questions" thing?
[11:01] kino
    No, no. Nothing so sophisticated.
[11:04] atsu
    Good point. That would
    make a boring question.
[11:08] kino
    Oh, you got one on me there.
[11:15] yumoto
    I can't eat any more...
[11:21] wom
    Huh?
[11:22] tawara
    Just ten more minutes...
[11:25] wom
    What, what?
[11:36] maru
    I am a puppet under my father's control.
SIGN    Sousa Enkaku
[11:39] maru
    I can only follow the rails he's laid for me.
[11:41] aur
    Is that so?
[11:47] aur
    Then perhaps it's time you did the controlling.
SIGN    Io Naruko
    Born December 17th
    Blood Type A / Capricorn
    Hobbies: Financial investment and management
    Likes: Money, beef bowls
[12:02] en
    They're... Or, I should say he's annoying.
[12:05] io
    He's awful. In the last two days,
    I've suffered a loss of 1.8 million.
[12:09] ryuu
    I wish he'd disappear. Just turn to dust.
[12:12] wom
    Really!
[12:13] wom
    With those two hanging around,
    I can't act freely at all!
[12:18] wom
    I have to stay close to that
    individual, and I can't even talk!
[12:22] wom
    I'm so restricted! I feel so trapped!
[12:25] wom
    You may as well call it oppression!
    We must do something at once!
[12:30] atsu
    Isn't this reaping what you sow?
[12:32] yumoto
    It's okay. I'll cuddle you in exchange.
[12:35] wom
    That ain't the point!
[12:36] yumoto
    They didn't come see me for an interview.
[12:39] yumoto
    I would've answered, too.
[12:41] wom
    You were just sleepin' like a baby!
[12:43] ryuu
    I've never seen Wombat so pissed off.
[12:46] io
    When he gets pissed off,
    he talks with a Kansai accent, then?
[12:49] atsu
    It's fine to rant, but please don't
    leave Mr. Tawarayama like that.
[12:53] ryuu
    Really, you keep cooling
    him off and heating him up...
[12:56] wom
    What are you sayin'?
[12:57] wom
    An hour or two away from him ain't
    gonna make a difference at this point!
[13:01] yumoto
    Wombat's gone delinquent!
[13:03] yumoto
    Hey, what's wrong with you—
[13:05] wombat
    Don't touch me!
[13:06] wombat
    Jackass! Your mama's got an outie!
[13:08] ryuu
    The stress is causing Wombat
    to resort to name calling!
[13:12] io
    He's being pretty careless.
[13:14] atsu
    Does that make him naïve?
[13:18] kino
    Hello!
[13:21] kino
    Is this what they call a "naked hang-out"?
[13:24] kino
    The Kurotama Bath.
    It's a fine location, isn't it?
[13:27] kino
    We're going to take
    advantage of it in a big way!
[13:31] kino
    So the Defense Club is taking a
    bath along with their pink pet.
[13:35] kino
    How nice! Talk about a fine picture!
[13:37] kino
    And Mr. Tawarayama has a very
    distinctive bathing style.
[13:47] atsu
    Excuse me, Kinosaki-san.
[13:48] atsu
    This is a private gathering.
    Could you please refrain from doing this?
[13:53] kino
    Oh, how rude of me.
[13:54] kino
    Of course, whether you participate
    or not is your own choice.
[13:58] atsu
    Well, outsiders are not really... you know?
[14:01] kino
    Oh? Does this place have a membership system?
[14:04] atsu
    No, it's not that...
[14:07] kino
    But Mr. Tawarayama sure can hold
    his breath a long time, can't he?
[14:15] en
    Seriously? At a time like this?
[14:17] yumoto
    This is the usual Lovra—
[14:20] kino
    Love? What was that? What was that?
[14:22] atsu
    Um, well...
[14:24] en
    Mr. Tawarayama's spent
    too long in the hot water.
[14:27] en
    Why don't we cool him down a while?
[14:28] both
    Yes, yes, let's do that.
[14:30] kino
    Ah, but...
[14:32] both
    C'mon, Mr. Tawarayama!
[14:33] ---
    You don't want to get dizzy.
[14:33] ---
    Let's take a break over there.
[14:37] atsu
    We'll be back soon.
[14:39] en
    Please, enjoy the bath, you two.
[14:42] wom
    Hurry! Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[14:46] atsu
    Calm down, Wombat.
[14:48] en
    There's no way we can transform here.
[14:50] wom
    But while we're standing here,
    love is, love was, love will be...
[14:55] en
    If we transform now, they'll find us out.
[14:57] atsu
    I bet he's already suspicious of us.
[14:59] yumoto
    Would it be bad if they found out?
[15:01] ryuu
    Of course.
[15:02] io
    If they find out...
[15:03] kino
    What's with those outfits?
[15:05] kino
    Is there a point to the big speeches?
[15:08] kino
    How does it feel?
[15:09] kino
    You guys!
[15:11] en
    No way.
[15:15] ryuu
    That hurts, darn it!
[15:17] io
    Can't we turn these things off?
[15:19] wom
    It won't stop until you end
    it with the Love Shower!
[15:22] en
    This sucks.
[15:23] atsu
    If we don't hurry, they'll finish their bath!
[15:26] yumoto
    We'll just have to kill him.
[15:27] all
    Huh?
[15:28] atsu
    Who?
[15:29] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama. He'll have to die for us!
[15:34] all
    Oh...
[15:35] all
    No way!
[15:37] ryuu
    How frightening!
[15:38] io
    Isn't that a little out of date?
[15:41] yumoto
    Now, now. Just hear me out.
[15:44] kino
    What are they talking about?
[15:48] kino
    What happened?
[15:50] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama...
[15:51] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama isn't breathing!
[15:56] yumoto
    Look, Kinosaki-san!
[15:58] yumoto
    See? He's not breathing, right?
    And his pupils are dilated!
[16:03] yumoto
    Go on! Check and make sure!
[16:06] yumoto
    Do it! It's the press's job to get to the truth!
[16:10] kino
    Th-That is true...
[16:12] kino
    Y-You're right. It's not beating.
[16:14] yumoto
    This is awful!
[16:17] atsu
    So, we're going to go call a doctor!
[16:20] atsu
    Please stay with Mr. Tawarayama until then!
[16:24] atsu
    Let's go, Defense Club!
[16:26] atsu
    Let's defend Mr. Tawarayama's life and health!
[16:29] four
    Yeah!
[16:30] kino
    Hey, wai—
[16:34] kino
    Hey! Go after them!
[16:35] taz
    But we're naked.
[16:37] kino
    They're naked, too!
[16:43] wom
    Now!
[16:44] yumoto
    Love Making!
[16:49] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[16:51] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[16:54] io
    Love is all!
[16:55] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[16:58] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:00] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:02] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[17:04] five
    Of love!
[17:08] ryuu
    Oh, come on!
[17:09] ryuu
    We don't need to do the introduction
    if we're transforming in secret!
[17:11] io
    Besides, we don't have time!
[17:13] wom
    It's a matter of feeling and etiquette!
[17:15] wom
    Let's go!
[17:21] boy
    There!
[17:29] boy
    It's hot.
[17:30] boy
    What is this?
[17:33] boy
    The air conditioner! And it's hot air!
[17:35] boy
    Who hit the heater button?
[17:40] monster
    Touching the control panel directly...
[17:42] monster
    You hate that minor task so much,
    you invented the remote control to avoid it.
[17:48] monster
    But in exchange for that slight saving of time,
[17:51] monster
    you also invite a great threat...
[17:54] monster
    Air conditioners that can't cool in the summer!
[17:57] monster
    Video games that can't get
    past the title screen!
[17:59] monster
    Bidet toilets that won't
    stop washing your butthole!
[18:02] monster
    TVs locked forever on TV Tokyo!
[18:07] monster
    Now, let's make things a little warmer!
[18:12] boys
    It's hot...
[18:13] boys
    So hot...
[18:19] yumoto
    Battle Lover Kick!
[18:26] yumoto
    You are really, really,
    really, really long-winded!
[18:28] yumoto
    We're in a hurry, you know!
[18:30] yumoto
    If you don't have a remote control,
    just pull the plug and consider from there!
[18:34] ryuu
    That was fast.
[18:35] en
    One hit?
[18:36] atsu
    It's like there was no
    reason for us to be here.
[18:38] io
    Seriously.
[18:39] yumoto
    Okay! Let's finish this quick!
[18:42] monster
    I don't think so!
[18:46] four
    He stopped!
[18:50] monster
    Did you forget I'm the
    Remote Control Monster?
[18:55] yumoto
    My body's moving on its own!
[18:57] monster
    You are but a puppet that moves
    as my remote control dictates!
[19:06] ---
    Gulp!
[19:07] monster
    C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
[19:13] monster
    C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
[19:17] wombat
    Shut up!
[19:19] yumoto
    Now!
[19:20] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[19:29] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[19:37] monster
    So I was also a mere puppet under their control?
[19:42] monster
    From now on, I should follow my own will...
[19:49] yumoto
    Love is over!
[19:51] atsu
    I'm so done objecting to that.
[19:53] en
    Hey, this is Sousa Enkaku from class 3-B.
[19:56] atsu
    So the monsters are being
    controlled by someone?
[20:00] ryuu
    Who could it be?
[20:01] io
    Hey! We have to get back, quick!
[20:03] yumoto
    Oh, no!
[20:08] kino
    What should we do?
[20:10] taz
    For the time being...
[20:17] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama! Have you come to?
[20:21] yumoto
    How do you feel?
[20:22] tawara
    Ah, hello, my friends. I feel fine.
[20:26] yumoto
    That is a fine thing to hear.
[20:28] ryuu
    Why are they talking like
    they're in a period drama?
[20:30] io
    Who knows?
[20:31] yumoto
    Mr. Tawaramura, this is
    Kinosaki-san and Tazawa-san,
[20:35] yumoto
    who took care of you while you were out.
[20:38] tawara
    So you are my Florence Nightengales?
[20:41] kino
    N-No...
[20:43] en
    We fooled them completely... I guess?
[20:45] atsu
    I dunno.
[20:46] yumoto
    I know! A picture! Let's take a picture!
[20:49] yumoto
    Gora! Come here a minute!
[20:52] gora
    What is it, Yumoto?
[20:54] kino
    The Village of the Eight Tombs!
[20:55] yumoto
    Take our picture for us!
[20:58] gora
    Sure.
[20:59] yumoto
    Let us borrow that.
[21:01] gora
    Okay, I'm taking it.
[21:02] yumoto
    Go for it!
[21:03] gora
    One, two... snap!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club Defending the Teacher
[21:11] kusa
    What is this?
[21:13] ari
    "The heartwarming bonds that
    unite the teachers and students
[21:16] ari
    of Binan High School," apparently.
[21:18] kusa
    What nonsense.
[21:20] kusa
    And why are they dressed like this?
[21:22] kusa
    It's the height of vulgarity.
[21:24] gero
    Although it seems to have
    gotten quite a reaction.
[21:27] kusa
    A reaction?
[21:28] gero
    Yes, along with words of praise
    from the neighborhood.
[21:34] ari
    What shall we do, Kinshiro?
[21:37] ari
    We'll have to accept their
    club application sooner or later.
SIGN    By order of the
    Binan High School
    Student Council
[21:47] gero
    Oh, it's upside down.
[21:50] kino
    Our direct report
[21:52] kino
    went pretty well for the first stage, didn't it?
[22:01] kino
    Right?
[23:40] io
    If we get bad grades on our finals,
    the Defense Club will be disbanded?!
[23:44] io
    And the student council is
    offering me a position as treasurer?
[23:48] io
    Sure thing, if you pay me!
[23:50] io
    Next time: Love is Something
    You Wear on Your Back.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is Something You Wear on Your Back
[23:53] io
    Love Making!

Season 1

6 - Love is Something You Wear on Your Back

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Salmon Vegetables Hamburg Steak
[00:07] yumoto
    Food! Food!
[00:09] en
    Yumoto, this is already your third meal of the day.
[00:12] yumoto
    I just get so hungry after a cuddle!
[00:16] yumoto
    Hey, I'll take this!
[00:18] atsu
    Being young is an amazing thing.
[00:20] en
    In his case, I don't think it has
    anything to do with being young.
[00:24] gero
    In my case,
[00:25] gero
    eating without a tablecloth on the table
    always cuts my appetite in half, but...
[00:30] gero
    President, Vice President,
    what about you two?
[00:33] kusa
    I've heard that in Europe during the Middle Ages,
[00:36] kusa
    they used the tablecloth to wipe their mouths.
[00:39] kusa
    I'm grateful that they changed
    that to individual napkins.
[00:43] ari
    Speaking of which,
[00:44] ari
    it's a shame the cafeteria has
    no finger bowls, don't you think?
[00:46] gero
    Oh, that's true.
[00:48] kusa
    Let's see if we can find room
    for it in the Student Council funds.
[00:52] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch! It makes me so happy!
[00:56] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch! Steamy hot!
[01:00] yumoto
    You gotta eat it while it's still warm!
[01:02] kusa
    The existence of such base and vulgar
    individuals here at Binan High School
[01:07] kusa
    absolutely cannot be permitted.
[01:08] gero
    In other words, you want to do something about
[01:12] gero
    the members of that Earth Defense Club thing?
[01:14] kusa
    You catch on quickly, Akoya.
SIGN    Love is Something You Wear on Your Back
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[02:54] wom
    Oh, my...
[02:59] yumoto
    An afternoon cuddle after lunch
    makes me feel so much better!
[03:01] wom
    Everyone!
[03:03] wom
    Don't you think it's strange?
SIGN    Potato Chips
[03:06] en
    What is?
[03:07] atsu
    That we pretend we don't see the cuddling?
[03:10] wom
    No! I mean the monsters!
[03:12] yumoto
    Oh? Did another one show up?
[03:14] wom
    Not that!
[03:16] wom
    Don't you think it's strange?
[03:18] wom
    They always seem to appear close to us.
[03:22] en
    Now that you mention it...
[03:23] atsu
    You think the enemy could
    be closer than we thought?
[03:26] io
    It's true, they do appear awfully
    frequently within our area of activity.
[03:30] ryuu
    Yeah, they seem to show up just
    as we start talking about them.
[03:37] gero
    Pardon me, Defense Club members.
[03:41] gero
    What is that stench?
[03:44] atsu
    Hey, Gero-kun. Can we help you?
[03:53] gero
    The truth is, I came to inform you
[03:55] gero
    that while your group has been approved as a club,
[03:59] gero
    student council rule 132 states that
[04:02] gero
    if the club members' final exam
    scores do not meet the average,
[04:06] gero
    your club will be dissolved.
[04:08] atsu
    Huh? There's a rule like that?
[04:11] gero
    It was just established.
[04:14] gero
    Well, that's all I wanted to say.
[04:17] gero
    That stench...
[04:19] gero
    Is there a dead animal here?
[04:24] en
    You've got the right idea.
[04:28] atsu
    I-Is that all you wanted?
[04:31] gero
    Yes. I'll be going, then.
[04:35] ryuu
    What are you looking at?
[04:36] gero
    Weren't you the one looking at me?
[04:42] ryuu
    Doesn't that guy have the
    wrong idea about something?
[04:45] io
    Maybe he's interested in you, Ryuu?
[04:47] ryuu
    Cut that out. It's gross.
[04:50] gero
    What is this unpleasant sensation?
[04:54] gero
    Really, I wish that club would just fall apart.
[04:58] wom
    I cannot allow it!
[04:59] wom
    The Earth Defense Club,
    so full of love, must not be dissolved!
[05:04] en
    But from their perspective,
    we must seem pretty incomprehensible.
[05:09] ryuu
    Well, that's true.
[05:10] wom
    Even so, we must prevent
    the club's dissolution!
[05:13] yumoto
    You're so passionate!
    Have your needs been building up?
[05:16] atsu
    That's you.
[05:18] wom
    Silence!
[05:19] wom
    Listen, all of you!
[05:21] wom
    You absolutely must see to it that
    your test scores beat the average!
[05:25] wom
    That is an order!
[05:34] en
    Ryuu, do you think
    you'll do okay on the finals?
[05:37] ryuu
    Nah, probably not.
[05:40] ryuu
    You've got it good, Kinugawa-senpai.
[05:42] ryuu
    You always get top scores.
[05:45] atsu
    Well, I suppose.
[05:46] atsu
    But I can't get 100s like En-chan does.
[05:50] ryuu
    Yufuin-senpai, you've
    gotten perfect scores before?
[05:52] en
    Yeah, when I successfully
    guess the subject matter.
[05:55] ryuu
    So if there's no need to worry about Io...
[05:58] en
    I guess the real problem is Yumoto.
[06:00] atsu
    Yumoto's an unknown quantity, huh?
[06:02] ryuu
    An unknown quantity?
[06:03] en
    I hear that in math, he can tell the
    area of a shape just by looking at it.
[06:07] ryuu
    Without any calculations?
[06:09] en
    No calculation at all.
[06:11] atsu
    He probably doesn't know
    the equations, after all.
[06:13] ryuu
    Wow.
[06:15] atsu
    But since his way of thinking is so unique,
[06:17] atsu
    in subjects like Japanese, he can easily get zeroes.
[06:22] yumoto
    So, how's the bath?
[06:24] en
    Yumoto, are you going to do okay on your tests?
[06:27] yumoto
    I'm not motivated at all.
[06:28] en
    Hey, hey.
[06:30] yumoto
    After all, I'm inheriting the
    family bath, so I don't need school!
[06:35] gora
    Yumoto. You must not become a man like me.
[06:39] gora
    A man good for nothing but chopping wood...
[06:42] yumoto
    Big bro...
[06:43] en
    Now, now. It's because
    your brother chops the wood
[06:46] en
    that we can enjoy the baths, after all.
[06:49] atsu
    But isn't Kurotama Bath's selling point
    that it runs off a free-flowing hot spring?
[06:55] atsu
    So it shouldn't really need firewood, right?
[06:58] ryuu
    Then what does he chop wood for?
[07:01] yumoto
    Why do you, big bro?
[07:07] yumoto
    I think the screws in my
    brother's head might be loose.
[07:10] en
    You're one to talk.
[07:11] yumoto
    Hey. Speaking of screws, do you
    know why they're called "screws"?
[07:18] ryuu
    Because you screw them in?
[07:19] yumoto
    Oh, I see!
[07:21] yumoto
    They're screws because you screw them in.
[07:23] en
    You mean that wasn't a quiz,
    just a normal question?
[07:25] yumoto
    That's amazing!
[07:27] yumoto
    Ryuu-senpai, you're amazing!
[07:30] yumoto
    The riddle I've been puzzling over
    since third grade is solved!
[07:32] yumoto
    Yay! Yay! I did it!
[07:33] ryuu
    That's too long to puzzle over something! Look it up!
[07:41] boy
    Naruko-senpai gets good grades
    and he's rich. He's amazing.
[07:45] boy
    He pretty much has no faults at all!
[07:48] boy
    H-Hey.
[07:57] itsu
    My name is Itsumo Ichiban.
SIGN    Itsumo Ichiban
[07:59] itsu
    As my name implies, my grades are "always #1."
[08:03] itsu
    But people still find me creepy because they say I sound dumb when I talk.
[08:08] itsu
    I don't particularly care, though.
[08:10] boy
    You know, Itsumo-senpai gets good grades,
[08:13] boy
    but isn't the way he talks kinda odd?
[08:14] boy
    I think he's got just one screw loose.
[08:17] itsu
    What do you mean, "kinda odd"?
[08:19] itsu
    If you think I'm creepy, just say I'm creepy.
[08:21] itsu
    And why would you say "just one screw"?
[08:24] itsu
    Why be so specific about that?
[08:25] io
    He talks to himself an awful lot.
[08:26] itsu
    Gets under my skin...
[08:29] io
    Oh, is that the time? I've got to hurry.
[08:33] gero
    Oh, pardon me.
[08:38] gero
    I've been wondering...
[08:41] gero
    Why does a man of your caliber
    associate with that bunch?
[08:45] io
    Are you talking to me?
[08:48] gero
    Of course.
[08:50] gero
    Someone like you would fit
    right in with the student council.
[08:54] io
    Is there any profit in listening to this?
SIGN    Student Council Room
[09:02] gero
    And so, I think the student council
    requires a head accountant
[09:06] gero
    who's an expert in modern finance.
[09:08] gero
    In other words, a treasurer.
[09:12] ari
    It's true that we're dealing
    with large sums of money here.
[09:16] kusa
    So, do you have any candidates?
[09:19] kusa
    They must have both the
    intelligence and refinement
[09:21] kusa
    suitable to our student council.
[09:23] gero
    Yes, I have one.
[09:32] io
    Me? Become the student council's treasurer?
[09:34] gero
    I don't think it's a bad deal at all.
[09:36] ari
    Of course, we know you're
    involved in the Defense Club, too.
[09:39] ari
    We don't expect you to answer right away.
[09:41] io
    No, I'll join.
[09:44] io
    If it will make me a profit.
[09:47] kusa
    To ask for money in exchange for a
    position on the sacred student council...
[09:52] kusa
    But that's interesting.
[09:54] kusa
    Then we will pay you adequate compensation.
[09:58] itsu
    I'm always #1 in my grade,
    so why is it #2 Naruko instead of me?
[10:03] itsu
    I can't understand it...
[10:06] gero
    Now, even if they manage
    to clear the test hurdle,
[10:09] gero
    the Defense Club will be
    left with four members.
SIGN    Wombat
    Born November 30th
     (converted to Earth calendar)
    Blood Type A (probably) / Sagittarius
    Hobby: World peace
    Likes: Love, spinach
[10:19] teach
    Okay, start your tests.
[10:23] ryuu
    Okay! Let's do this!
[10:25] io
    Didn't you say you were tired before?
[10:27] ryuu
    I am tired, but I won't sleep well if
    the club is dissolved because of me.
[10:34] itsu
    It gets under my skin so bad...
[10:36] itsu
    He's the one person I can't lose to.
[10:39] itsu
    Of course, I'm going to be #1 like always...
[10:43] teach
    Itsumo, something wrong?
SIGN    Combined Finals Rankings
[10:53] student
    Hey, what are you doing?
[10:55] student
    No pushing! What's with you?
SIGN    Score Masatou Mu Zuruwaki Chitsugi Takashin Matsuji Itsumo Ichiban Naruko Io Name
[10:58] itsu
    Wh-What is this?!
[11:00] itsu
    Th-This must not happen!
[11:04] itsu
    H-He makes money and gets #1,
[11:07] itsu
    while I do nothing but study and get #2...
[11:10] itsu
    It's unforgivable!
[11:18] kusa
    Are you all right, Lord Zundar?
[11:21] zun
    There.
[11:23] zun
    He will be our target this time!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[11:27] yumoto
    Oh, wow!
[11:28] yumoto
    I got another zero in Japanese!
[11:31] en
    That's okay, it was within expectations.
[11:33] wom
    How'd you do, Zaou-san?
[11:35] ryuu
    To be frank, I didn't reach average in anything.
[11:39] en
    It's okay.
[11:40] en
    Naruko's high grades mean our
    second year guys averaged out.
[11:44] ryuu
    Thank you, Io!
[11:46] wom
    Kinugawa-san, how about you?
[11:49] atsu
    I got about 30 points
    over the average, I suppose.
[11:52] ryuu
    Which means...
[11:53] atsu
    That doesn't completely cover for Yumoto's zero.
[11:55] atsu
    So we still haven't reached average...
[11:59] wom
    Which means everything's
    riding on Yufuin-san's results...
[12:03] atsu
    Did you guess the subject matter right?
[12:07] en
    Right on the mark!
[12:09] wom
    I-Incredible!
[12:10] ryuu
    That's our Yufuin-senpai!
[12:12] ryuu
    You're a guy who can do it when it counts!
[12:14] yumoto
    Can I take these?
[12:16] en
    What would you do with them?
[12:18] yumoto
    Keep them as heirlooms.
[12:19] en
    You don't have to do that.
[12:21] atsu
    Well, this is a relief, though.
[12:23] atsu
    Now the club won't be dissolved.
[12:25] wom
    Oh, I'm so relieved!
[12:27] io
    Hey there.
[12:28] ryuu
    Hey, Io! Looks like our club won't be dissolved.
[12:33] io
    That's great to hear.
[12:35] io
    Oh, but I'm quitting the Defense Club.
[12:39] io
    They said they'd provide me with compensation,
[12:40] io
    so I decided to join the student council.
[12:43] io
    Considering my side business,
[12:44] io
    I won't have any time left for club activities,
[12:46] io
    so I thought I'd just quit.
[12:49] io
    So, that said, I'll be going now.
[13:00] ryuu
    Hang on, Io!
[13:02] io
    Is something wrong?
[13:05] ryuu
    "Is something wrong," my ass!
    What's this all about?
[13:10] io
    It means that money is important.
[13:13] io
    Money doesn't betray.
[13:16] ryuu
    But you do betray?!
[13:25] en
    I guess this screams "youth."
[13:28] yumoto
    Did something happen?
[13:30] wom
    This is an emergency situation!
[13:33] atsu
    Even though we cleared the test hurdle,
[13:34] atsu
    if Io quits, the club will be dissolved
[13:37] atsu
    for no longer having five members.
[13:41] wom
    Oh, sole mio!
[13:43] wom
    What should we do?!
[13:46] yumoto
    It's here! A monster!
[13:48] monster
    Screw screw screw...
[13:50] monster
    Screw screw screw...
[13:53] yumoto
    It's saying "screw"!
    That must be a Screw Monster!
[13:57] en
    Another odd one...
[13:58] atsu
    I can't tell by looking at it
    whether it's strong or weak.
[14:01] wom
    Now, everyone, transform!
[14:04] yumoto
    Oh, but should we call Io-senpai?
[14:06] ryuu
    No need for that!
[14:09] ryuu
    We don't need Io here.
    I could beat that monster by myself!
[14:12] ryuu
    Let's go!
[14:13] yumoto
    Wow, you're raring to go! I'll follow you!
[14:17] en
    Good grief, this again?
[14:19] atsu
    Now, don't say that.
[14:21] wom
    It's time to Love Making
    into the Battle Lovers!
[14:24] yumoto
    Love Making!
[14:52] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[14:53] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[14:56] en
    Love Making.
[15:06] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[15:08] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[15:10] atsu
    Love Making!
[15:20] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[15:22] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[15:25] ryuu
    Love Making!
[15:35] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[15:36] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[15:39] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[15:42] four
    Of love!
[15:45] monster
    Screw screw screw!
[15:49] yumoto
    Hold it, Screw Monster!
[15:50] monster
    Screw! Screw screw!
[15:54] ryuu
    Okay, let's go!
[15:57] ryuu
    Even without Sulfur here...
[15:58] ryuu
    I'll face you myself!
[16:00] monster
    Screw screw screw!
[16:03] monster
    Screw!
[16:05] ryuu
    Darn it!
[16:07] monster
    Screw!
[16:09] monster
    I'm gonna screw you up good!
[16:16] monster
    Screw, screw...
[16:17] monster
    Tickle tickle tickle!
[16:22] ryuu
    Hey! Stop it! Cut that out!
[16:25] monster
    Tickle tickle tickle!
[16:27] en
    What's with that monster?
[16:30] atsu
    Its attacks are so stupid.
[16:32] yumoto
    Maybe, being a screw monster,
    it's got just one screw loose?
[16:38] yumoto
    Vesta's crying!
[16:40] atsu
    Yeah, being tickled makes
    him cry for some reason.
[16:44] en
    That's just humiliating.
[16:48] io
    Being that ticklish...
[16:50] io
    He's playing right into the enemy's hands!
[16:58] io
    Love Making.
[17:08] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[17:10] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:14] yumoto
    Darn you...
[17:19] io
    Take your filthy hands off him.
[17:22] atsu
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:24] io
    I will not tolerate you touching Vesta!
[17:27] monster
    Screw?
[17:28] yumoto
    So cool!
[17:47] itsu
    Th-That hurt...
[17:49] yumoto
    Did you see that?
[17:50] yumoto
    Even if Vesta fails,
    Sulfur will cover for him!
[17:54] yumoto
    When the two of them are
    together, they're unbeatable!
[17:56] yumoto
    That's the kind of team we are!
[17:59] en
    Are you in any place to talk?
[18:00] atsu
    You're the one we have
    to cover for most of all.
[18:02] yumoto
    You should make friends, too! Don't be alone!
[18:06] monster
    I-I would if I could...
[18:10] yumoto
    In that case, I'll be your friend!
[18:14] yumoto
    Okay, let's go!
[18:17] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[18:19] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[18:22] atsu
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[18:24] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[18:39] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[18:50] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[19:00] monster
    Thank you for being my friend...
[19:05] monster
    I'm so happy.
[19:11] yumoto
    Love is over!
[19:18] ari
    I can't believe we lost.
[19:22] gero
    Battle Lovers...
[19:23] gero
    You'll pay!
[19:25] gero
    You will never get away with this!
[19:27] atsu
    Is that... our enemy?
[19:29] ryuu
    Their faces are blurred out, though.
    Their voices, too.
[19:34] io
    Does that mean they have the same
    advanced camouflage skill we do?
[19:40] ryuu
    Some outfits.
[19:42] en
    Looks like a cosplay contest.
[19:44] atsu
    They're probably saying the same about us.
[19:47] gero
    You people are lacking in beauty.
    Too lacking in beauty!
[19:51] yumoto
    What's with you guys? Who are you?
[19:54] kusa
    How rude of us.
[19:57] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
[19:59] kusa
    Aurite!
[20:01] ari
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[20:03] ari
    Argent!
[20:05] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[20:08] gero
    Perlite!
[20:10] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[20:13] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[20:16] yumoto
    Kaeru (frog)?
[20:18] ari
    Well, shall we leave it at that for now?
[20:22] gero
    Commanders can't be
    expected to fight, after all.
[20:24] kusa
    The next time we meet will be the end of you.
[20:28] kusa
    You'd do well to prepare for it.
[20:33] atsu
    They introduced themselves then left...
[20:35] en
    Lucky us. You can't talk
    to people like that anyway.
[20:40] ryuu
    Weren't you a bit late?
[20:41] io
    I'm sorry.
[20:43] io
    I was calculating the profit margin
    I'd achieve if I joined the student council.
[20:47] ryuu
    So, which did you determine was more profitable?
[20:50] io
    I can't tell you that.
[20:53] ryuu
    You should be able to do a calculation
    like that in your head immediately!
[20:55] yumoto
    I guess we're back to normal, huh?
[20:57] ryuu
    What took you so long?!
[20:57] en
    Let's go home. I'm tired.
[20:58] io
    Well, figuring in the rate of
    fluctuation made it difficult...
[20:59] atsu
    I want to get changed.
[21:02] wom
    Well, that settles that!
[21:11] gero
    So, in the end, Naruko-kun turned us down.
[21:14] ari
    So the Defense Club will continue on?
[21:16] kusa
    Enough. This topic is not suitable for lunchtime.
[21:20] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch! It makes me so happy!
[21:24] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch!
[21:26] yumoto
    You gotta eat it while it's still warm!
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:34] yumoto
    How's the water feel?
[21:35] en
    It's perfect.
[21:37] yumoto
    Big bro! He says the water's perfect!
[21:40] atsu
    No, but really, this is a natural hot spring.
[21:44] atsu
    He's not preserving the
    heat by chopping wood...
[21:46] ryuu
    To be honest, there's
    zero point in chopping wood.
[21:48] io
    I don't understand him at all.
[21:50] yumoto
    No, when I look at my
    big brother's back, I know.
[21:54] yumoto
    He's not a man good for
    nothing but chopping wood.
[21:56] yumoto
    Chopping wood is just what he loves!
[21:59] yumoto
    I want to become a man who throws
    himself into what he loves, just like him.
[23:40] wom
    Just because it's summer,
    you're going to the beach? Really...
[23:43] wom
    Just what do you think your
    duty as the Battle Lovers is?!
[23:47] wom
    What? Mr. Tawarayama is missing!
[23:50] wom
    Next time: Love, Training Camp,
    and Toothbrushes.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes
[23:53] wom
    Love Making!

Season 1

7 - Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Binan High School Sakashita
[00:08] yumoto
    The other guys sure are late!
[00:10] en
    What's with his outfit?
[00:13] atsu
    Makes it hard to shout, "Sorry
    for the wait!" and run up to him.
[00:15] ryuu
    He's a grade schooler. A grade schooler
    who can't wait to get to the ocean.
[00:18] io
    Actually, you can't ride a train
    without a shirt on, can you?
[00:22] io
    It's criminal indecent exposure.
[00:24] ryuu
    We don't have a choice. Let's get him dressed.
[00:28] yumoto
    You're late, senpai!
[00:30] en
    No, we've been here a while.
[00:32] en
    We just didn't have the
    courage to call out to you.
[00:35] ryuu
    Anyway, put something on.
[00:37] atsu
    By the way, where's Wombat?
[00:39] wombat
    My, my! Sorry for the wait, everyone!
[00:42] en
    Oh, he's here.
[00:43] yumoto
    Wom-san!
[00:44] atsu
    Even in this heat, you want to handle him?
[00:47] yumoto
    The urge to cuddle isn't restricted by the season!
[00:51] atsu
    That sounds rough.
SIGN    Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes
[02:34] yumoto
    So good! Kakinotane are so good!
[02:38] atsu
    It's been hot every day.
    Will Mr. Tawarayama be okay?
[02:41] wom
    Of course, that's why I brought him.
[02:44] ryuu
    The FX again?
[02:45] io
    No, I'm checking out an online lodging service.
[02:49] io
    You should be able to get a discount
    if you register your email address.
[02:53] ryuu
    That's our Io.
[02:54] en
    Remind me.
[02:56] en
    Why did we end up going to a training
    camp in this terrible heat, again?
[03:00] atsu
    Hey, come on.
SIGN    Active Summer
    Travel!
[03:04] en
    Hey. Let's go to the ocean.
[03:07] both
    Ocean!
[03:10] en
    Oh, really? I proposed it?
[03:12] yumoto
    What's wrong with a training camp?
[03:15] yumoto
    It's the ocean! The ocean!
[03:16] atsu
    There'll be a hot spring there, too.
[03:18] ryuu
    No female presence, though.
[03:20] gero
    The peasants do love their trains, don't they?
[03:22] gero
    But a limousine is so much more luxurious.
[03:24] ari
    I think they take trains because they don't
    have limousines, not because they like it.
[03:28] gero
    Really?
[03:29] gero
    But I still don't like traveling by train.
[03:33] gero
    What about you, President?
[03:34] kusa
    I have no objection to traveling by train.
[03:37] kusa
    However, it should at least be chartered.
[03:40] gero
    That's right.
[03:41] gero
    Would you like some special selection Kakinotane?
[03:44] kusa
    I would.
[03:46] yumoto
    Ocean!
[03:49] yumoto
    It's the ocean! The ocean!
[03:50] ryuu
    We know. You don't have to shout.
[03:53] en
    Well, you've got the blinding
    sun and the white sand, but...
[03:57] en
    Is it just my imagination,
    or is something a bit odd?
[04:03] ryuu
    It's all dudes.
[04:05] io
    You're right. Why is it all men here?
[04:08] en
    Is this actually "that kind of place"?
[04:11] yumoto
    What's "that kind of place"?
[04:12] en
    Hey, Atsushi. You're the one
    who chose this place, right?
[04:15] yumoto
    You were?
[04:17] atsu
    Well, see...
[04:19] atsu
    Let's see. Danran Beach... Danran Beach...
[04:23] atsu
    "Danran" as in "happy family" Beach...
[04:26] atsu
    I was sure it was in this area...
[04:27] macho
    Hey, buddy!
[04:29] macho
    Are you looking for a beach?
[04:31] atsu
    Uh, yeah.
[04:32] macho
    Let me show you!
[04:36] atsu
    Th-Thank you...
SIGN    Welcome to Danran (Wild Man) Beach
[04:40] atsu
    It was the wrong Danran...
[04:42] en
    Be aware of this stuff.
[04:43] atsu
    Sorry.
[04:44] io
    The name by itself sounds very family-oriented.
[04:46] ryuu
    No wonder it lacks in female presence.
[04:49] yumoto
    So? What's wrong with this place?
[04:52] yumoto
    There's not too many people,
    and the ocean is beautiful!
[04:54] wom
    My first trip to the ocean!
[04:57] wom
    It's a wonderful beach, isn't it?
[05:15] yumoto
    Ocean!
[05:17] gero
    This would be the perfect resort,
    if not for all that vulgar noise.
[05:21] gero
    It's a shame, isn't it?
[05:23] kusa
    Clear the mind of mundane thoughts,
[05:25] kusa
    and you can block out even the basest of noises.
[05:28] ari
    That's our Kinshiro.
[05:29] ari
    You're strict with yourself even at a resort, eh?
[05:31] [SONG] sign
     Ice Beach Shop Danran Takoyaki, Yakisoba, Frankfurters
[05:37] macho
    Hey, buddy, you sure can put
    'em down! Wanna try for another?
[05:40] tawara
    Let's go! Let's go!
[05:41] tawra
    And another for my wombat!
[05:43] wom
    Squeak! Squeak!
[05:45] macho
    So cute!
[05:47] yumoto
    I want to cuddle him, too...
[05:49] host
    Hello there.
[05:51] host
    Well, cutie pie, have you decided on your order?
[05:55] yumoto
    Wow! You're so cool, Miss...
[05:59] yumoto
    Umm... Mister?
[06:00] host
    "Miss" is just fine.
[06:02] yumoto
    Got it! Then I'll have a rainbow frappé, Miss!
[06:06] host
    And is that all?
[06:07] yumoto
    Yeah!
[06:08] host
    We've got many far more amazing things.
[06:12] host
    Far more amazing.
[06:13] yumoto
    Really?!
[06:15] ryuu
    Is it okay to leave them like that?
[06:18] en
    My instincts are telling me
    not to go near that place.
[06:22] atsu
    En-chan, I think you could fit right in.
[06:25] io
    You can make a favorable impression by
    offering things at below market value.
[06:28] atsu
    Anyway, are you guys hungry?
[06:30] en
    Yeah. Let's go to the inn.
SIGN    Inn Tamakuro Bath
[06:35] yumoto
    Tamakuro Bath?
[06:36] ryuu
    I'm getting an incredible sense of déjà vu.
[06:38] yumoto
    Yeah. It looks just like the Kurotama Bath!
[06:41] atsu
    This was the only place
    with vacancies this weekend.
[06:44] en
    This doesn't feel fresh at all.
[06:46] io
    Are they cutting corners?
[06:47] atsu
    Don't say that!
[06:51] wom
    Well, shall we get going?
[06:56] yumoto
    Sleepover!
[06:57] yumoto
    We owe you for a night's stay and a meal!
[07:00] en
    Not bad, eh?
[07:01] ryuu
    But isn't it a bit small for all of us?
[07:03] io
    No. We'll only be sleeping here,
    so it should be fine.
[07:06] en
    Yeah.
[07:12] kusa
    Not bad, I'd say.
[07:13] ari
    I'm sorry it's so small.
    It's the only room they had left.
[07:16] gero
    We each have our own bedroom, right?
[07:18] ari
    Of course.
[07:19] gero
    Then there's no problem!
SIGN    Men
SIGN    Large
    Bath
[07:23] en
    Nothing new here, either.
[07:25] io
    In fact, it's exactly what we always do.
[07:27] ryuu
    Doesn't feel like we've traveled at all.
[07:29] atsu
    Sorry.
[07:31] en
    It's not your fault, Atsushi.
[07:32] io
    This actually makes it more relaxing.
[07:34] ryuu
    Isn't it funny how similar it looks?
[07:36] en
    There may even be other similarities.
[07:38] yumoto
    If I open this door...
[07:40] yumoto
    Maybe my brother Goro will be there!
[07:42] atsu
    No way.
[07:43] yumoto
    There!
[07:45] yumoto
    Wow!
[07:46] yumoto
    An open-air bath!
[07:47] wom
    What?!
[07:50] en
    An unexpected development.
[07:51] atsu
    Want to check it out?
[07:52] en
    Of course.
[07:54] en
    This is nice!
[07:55] ryuu
    They should have a sign out for this.
[08:01] io
    Everyone!
[08:03] io
    There's been an incident.
[08:04] yumoto
    A murder?!
[08:06] atsu
    Now, now. This isn't Detective C*nan.
[08:08] yumoto
    I guess...
[08:09] io
    Someone has used my toothbrush!
[08:14] ryuu
    Toothbrush?
[08:15] io
    Yes.
[08:16] io
    My toothbrush!
[08:26] io
    This is a criminal act.
[08:29] io
    It can be called nothing but a criminal act!
[08:32] io
    This was no mistake.
[08:34] io
    Someone used my toothbrush on purpose!
[08:37] en
    No, no, it was probably just a mistake.
[08:40] ryuu
    That's right. You're overthinking it, Io.
[08:42] io
    Are you sure?
[08:44] io
    If any of you were in my position right now,
[08:46] io
    you would be able to understand this
    unparalleled feeling of discomfort!
[08:50] io
    Try to imagine it.
[08:52] io
    Someone has intentionally used your toothbrush.
[08:55] io
    What's more, they didn't even wash it afterwards.
[08:57] io
    They treated it coarsely, as if they wanted
    the victim to discover the signs of its use!
[09:01] atsu
    I probably wouldn't like that.
[09:02] en
    Yeah, I wouldn't like it.
[09:04] ryuu
    There are only men here, after all.
[09:06] wom
    It wasn't me!
[09:08] en
    What's with the sudden flag?
[09:10] wom
    I'm merely telling the truth.
[09:12] wom
    First of all, I'd never do such a monstrous
    thing with Mr. Tawarayama right here.
[09:17] atsu
    But you're just controlling him, aren't you?
[09:19] tawara
    I am absolutely not being controlled.
[09:21] en
    You're a corpse.
[09:22] wom
    I told you, he's not dead yet!
[09:24] yumoto
    I use an electric frog toothbrush!
[09:27] io
    Are you people trying to change the subject?
[09:29] atsu
    I haven't brushed my teeth yet.
[09:31] ryuu
    Same.
[09:32] en
    Me, either.
[09:34] io
    Very well.
[09:35] io
    Then, everyone face me and go, "Hah!"
[09:39] io
    "Hah!"
[09:40] yumoto
    Hah?
[09:41] io
    If you've brushed your teeth,
[09:43] io
    there should still be the faint scent
    of toothpaste on your breath!
[09:46] ryuu
    That makes sense.
[09:47] en
    But why do you care so much if
    a toothbrush or two gets used?
[09:51] yumoto
    I agree!
[09:53] ryuu
    But don't you see why
    Io would feel conflicted?
[09:56] ryuu
    Someone used his toothbrush on purpose.
[09:58] ryuu
    It's like getting tricked into an indirect kiss.
[10:00] yumoto
    Oh, that's like when you secretly play
    the recorder of someone you like, right?
[10:05] io
    Yes. That's exactly it.
[10:07] atsu
    That really would be rough.
[10:09] io
    It is very rough!
[10:11] io
    Especially if the criminal
    turns out to be one of us here!
[10:17] en
    Really?
[10:18] en
    I wouldn't care that much, personally.
[10:21] io
    Yufuin-senpai.
[10:22] io
    I've noticed that all this time,
[10:25] io
    you've been trying to shrug this
    problem off as much as possible.
[10:29] io
    Are you afraid of something
    coming out if you're questioned?
[10:33] en
    Huh? Hey, what's with this vibe?
[10:37] en
    You're acting like I secretly used Naruko's toothbrush
[10:40] en
    and now I'm over the moon about it or something.
[10:42] wom
    It's not unthinkable.
[10:45] wom
    My observations tell me that you're a person
[10:48] wom
    who could be classified as a
    loose individual in many respects.
[10:53] wom
    Particularly in regard to morality.
[10:55] en
    Hey, now. This is getting weird.
[10:58] atsu
    Of course, if En-chan could be called gray,
[11:01] atsu
    Ryuu isn't exactly pure white, either.
[11:03] ryuu
    Me?
[11:04] atsu
    Ryuu, you claim to love women,
[11:06] atsu
    but I've never actually seen
    you with a woman before.
[11:09] atsu
    Let's be honest. You like Io, right?
[11:12] ryuu
    Gross!
[11:13] ryuu
    It's gross when you put it that way.
[11:15] ryuu
    I consider Io my buddy, so he's, I mean...
[11:20] ryuu
    It's not that kind of...
[11:21] io
    Ryuu... Was it you?
[11:25] ryuu
    Io...
[11:27] ryuu
    Okay, this really is getting weird!
[11:30] ryuu
    Do something, Yumoto!
[11:32] yumoto
    I don't see why it matters
    whose toothbrush you use!
[11:35] io
    Stop passing the conversation to Yumoto.
[11:38] io
    We're getting off topic!
[11:39] ryuu
    Sorry.
[11:40] atsu
    Anyway, the question is, can we assume
    that someone among us has eyes for Io?
[11:46] en
    You can sum it up like that,
    but you're a suspect, too, Atsushi.
[11:51] ryuu
    That's true.
[11:52] ryuu
    Kinugawa-senpai, I've seen you
    look at Io in a rather odd way before.
[11:55] atsu
    No, no, no, no...
[12:00] yumoto
    I'm pruning. Can we get out now?
[12:04] en
    Good idea.
[12:08] en
    They're rather close... the futons.
[12:10] atsu
    Yeah.
[12:11] atsu
    I don't know about sleeping this close
    to you guys under these circumstances...
[12:15] ryuu
    Why are you acting like a victim here?
[12:18] ryuu
    Yufuin-senpai, Kinugawa-senpai,
    you're both incredibly gray individuals.
[12:21] io
    That's right.
[12:24] yumoto
    But we can't sleep yet, huh?
[12:27] yumoto
    We should keep having fun!
[12:28] yumoto
    Like a pillow fight, or a test of courage!
[12:31] yumoto
    It's a training camp! We've gotta do it!
[12:32] ryuu
    You really are a grade schooler.
[12:34] en
    It amazes me that you can think about
    having fun in these circumstances.
[12:39] yumoto
    Well, shall we start with the test of courage?
[12:42] io
    We didn't even have a
    conversation, let alone a debate.
[12:46] en
    Yeah.
[12:48] yumoto
    Pass through the forest next to the inn.
[12:50] yumoto
    That lit-up tree is the goal!
[12:54] yumoto
    Everyone, do you have your map
    and flashlights from the inn?
[12:58] all
    Yes.
[13:00] atsu
    We're really doing this, huh?
[13:02] en
    We've got lights, after all.
[13:03] ryuu
    Well, I don't think I could sleep with
    that weird feeling hanging over us anyway.
[13:07] io
    I absolutely can't sleep.
[13:08] io
    Not until I find the culprit
    who used my toothbrush.
[13:12] en
    But when you think about it,
[13:14] en
    should we have a test of courage
    in these circumstances?
[13:17] io
    What do you mean?
[13:18] en
    Well, it happens a lot, you know?
[13:28] en
    That kind of thing.
[13:30] io
    I see.
[13:31] ryuu
    I'm not gonna hug anyone!
[13:33] yumoto
    Okay, let's get started!
[13:35] io
    Listen to what we're saying here!
[13:36] atsu
    Saying that to Yumoto won't do any good.
[13:39] en
    True.
[13:45] gero
    The beachside this afternoon...
[13:47] gero
    Is there really nothing we can do about it?
[13:49] kuso
    If it bothers you that much,
[13:51] kuso
    shall I talk to the owners and
    buy up the surrounding beaches?
[13:55] ari
    Strong words, those are.
[13:57] ari
    Shall we get out of the
    bath and have some tea?
[14:04] atsu
    It's pitch black, huh?
[14:05] en
    Atsushi. You're too close.
[14:08] atsu
    Sorry. I just got scared.
[14:10] en
    So he says, but I bet he got close on purpose.
[14:13] atsu
    Is En-chan being overly aware of my presence?
[14:18] atsu
    Wh-What?!
[14:20] en
    Sorry, I tripped over a rock.
[14:23] en
    Hey, Atsushi, are you eating properly?
[14:26] en
    Your waist is really thin.
[14:28] atsu
    My waist is thin?
[14:30] atsu
    En-chan, you really are...
[14:32] en
    Crap...
[14:33] en
    I totally should not have said that...
[14:41] ryuu
    Woah, scary.
[14:43] ryuu
    It really does feel like a ghost will show up.
[14:45] io
    Living people are far scarier.
[14:47] io
    They do things like using people's toothbrushes.
[14:49] ryuu
    Yeah, but still...
[14:50] ryuu
    I really don't handle this kind of thing well.
[14:53] io
    He's sticking so close to me...
[14:56] io
    Is Ryuu's womanizing just camouflage, after all?
[15:00] ryuu
    If only I were with a cute girl here...
[15:03] ryuu
    But then I'd want her doing this to me...
[15:08] ari
    Hey, I know. You want to try taking a shortcut?
[15:11] ari
    Huh? Kinshiro? Akoya?
[15:15] [SONG] sign
    Private Property
    Keep Out
    -Danran Resort
[15:21] yumoto
    Feels good!
[15:23] yumoto
    The cuddles that you have regardless of
    who might be watching are so amazing.
[15:28] wom
    Th-That was awful... You beast!
[15:31] yumoto
    I cuddle when I want to!
[15:33] yumoto
    That's the condition for joining
    the Battle Lovers, isn't it?
[15:36] wom
    I never agreed to that.
[15:38] yumoto
    Now, let's go!
[15:39] wom
    How self-serving you are...
[15:48] yumoto
    He's gone.
[15:50] yumoto
    Hey! Where are you?
[15:53] yumoto
    I'm gonna leave you behind!
[15:55] gero
    Could it be...
[15:57] gero
    that I'm lost?
[15:59] gero
    Arima will make fun of me...
[16:03] kusa
    I've been careless.
[16:06] kusa
    How could I fall behind the other two?
[16:11] wom
    I must have lost consciousness...
[16:14] wom
    M-Mr. Tawarayama?!
[16:18] wom
    Where did you go?!
[16:20] tam
    Where am I? And in a yukata, at that?
[16:23] tam
    I'm sure I was just preparing tests at school...
[16:27] atsu
    Huh? I thought I saw a flash.
[16:30] en
    Probably a camera.
[16:32] en
    I had my suspicions about him.
[16:34] atsu
    Who?
[16:36] en
    The toothbrush incident, this development...
[16:38] en
    It's all seemed too odd to me.
[16:40] atsu
    It's true that this sort of thing
    would never happen normally.
[16:43] en
    Which means...
[16:45] atsu
    Wombat...
[16:46] en
    Let's take him to task.
[16:51] taw
    What's going on?!
[16:57] taw
    Wh-Why is this happening?
[17:01] io
    Did you hear something?
[17:02] ryuu
    Behind us, right?
[17:04] io
    Yes.
[17:05] ryuu
    A m-molester?
[17:06] io
    Why would you think that?
[17:08] ryuu
    Well, there was that "unique" beach back there...
[17:11] ryuu
    And we're pretty hot guys, you know?
[17:13] io
    Well, I suppose if I had to classify us,
    we'd be on the hot side.
[17:16] ryuu
    Right?
[17:17] ryuu
    So it must have been the molester
    who used your toothbrush.
[17:21] ryuu
    It's obvious that no one in our group
    would do something like that!
[17:24] io
    You have a point.
[17:26] ryuu
    Let's catch him and take him to task!
[17:28] io
    Good idea.
[17:29] taw
    Was I dead, perhaps?
[17:32] taw
    My body feels rather numb,
    there's not much feeling...
[17:36] taw
    S-Someone save me!
[17:44] en
    Okay, on three.
[17:47] atsu
    Yeah.
[17:51] ryuu
    Okay, on three.
[17:54] io
    Right.
[17:55] both
    One, two...
[17:56] all
    Three!
[18:06] io
    Did you catch the molester?
[18:11] ryuu
    Why are you guys here?
[18:12] gero
    Who are you calling a molester?
[18:15] gero
    And you're heavy!
[18:17] en
    Mr. President.
[18:19] en
    You smell nice. Fresh out of the bath?
[18:22] kusa
    Remove yourself from me at once!
[18:24] en
    Sure, sorry.
[18:28] atsu
    You okay?
[18:32] kusa
    Aside from an extreme feeling of discomfort.
[18:37] io
    Can you stand?
[18:39] gero
    I'm fine.
[18:42] io
    There's a leaf stuck on you.
[18:45] ryuu
    Why are you turning red?
[18:47] gero
    Sh-Shut up!
[18:49] atsu
    What are you doing here?
[18:51] kusa
    What are you all doing here?
[18:53] en
    Defense Club training camp.
[18:55] kusa
    I wasn't asking you!
[18:57] ari
    Huh?
[18:58] ari
    What's all this?
[19:00] ari
    What are you all doing here together?
[19:01] kusa
    Never mind. It's all meaningless.
[19:03] kusa
    I don't want to think about it.
[19:05] kusa
    I'm erasing it from my memory.
[19:07] gero
    Hey, President, wait for us!
[19:10] ari
    I have no idea what's going on, but bye!
[19:12] io
    What are they doing here?
[19:14] atsu
    It's a mystery.
[19:16] en
    There was a weird vibe to those guys, too.
[19:20] yumoto
    Everyone's taking so long!
[19:22] yumoto
    Even Wom-san ran away.
[19:24] yumoto
    Nothing to do.
[19:26] atsu
    I really do suspect Wombat, though.
[19:28] en
    He's an alien, after all.
[19:30] ryuu
    I'm still pushing the molester theory.
[19:32] io
    Rejected.
[19:33] ryuu
    Huh?
[19:35] yumoto
    I've been waiting forever!
[19:37] ryuu
    Sorry, sorry.
[19:38] atsu
    A lot of things happened.
[19:43] taw
    Are those my students?
[19:46] taw
    Hey!
[19:55] yumoto
    A monster!
[19:57] yumoto
    Let's Love Making!
[20:00] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[20:03] five
    Battle Lovers!
[20:05] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[20:07] five
    Of love!
[20:10] yumoto
    Take this, monster!
[20:25] wom
    No! Don't do that!
[20:27] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[20:38] taw
    What's going on?!
[20:49] yumoto
    Huh? Mr. Tawarayama?
[20:52] io
    So it wasn't a monster?
[20:54] ryuu
    I guess Tawarayama was the monster.
[20:56] atsu
    To be honest, it was so dark,
    I couldn't really see...
[20:59] en
    We kinda got carried away there.
[21:01] wom
    Tawarayama-san! Are you okay?
[21:03] en
    It's fine. He was dead already anyway.
[21:06] atsu
    Was this your doing?
[21:08] io
    If you're going to scare us,
    at least do it properly.
[21:10] wom
    Um...
[21:11] ryuu
    Say "boo" or something.
[21:13] io
    That's too old-fashioned.
[21:15] ryuu
    It was just one example!
[21:17] yumoto
    I'm so sleepy. Let's go home.
[21:21] ryuu
    You're the one who wanted
    to do the test of courage!
[21:23] atsu
    Well, let's go back anyway.
[21:25] en
    Yeah.
[21:26] io
    More importantly, I want to know
    who used my toothbrush!
[21:30] en
    You're still stuck on that?
[21:32] atsu
    Let's go, Yumoto.
[21:33] yumoto
    Okay...
[21:34] io
    I will not sleep until we resolve
    the matter of my toothbrush!
[21:37] wom
    Um... Everyone...
[21:40] wom
    Please help me... Please...
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[21:50] wom
    They're a bit blurry from the camera shaking...
[21:53] wom
    But it's nice to gain new memories like this.
[21:58] wom
    Though things got a bit hairy at the end there.
[22:02] wom
    Th-This is...
SIGN    Delete this photo?
    Yes | No
[23:40] kusa
    "Friendship!"
[23:41] kusa
    There is nothing more
    transient and fragile than this.
[23:45] kusa
    Now, let us sever the bonds between people,
[23:48] kusa
    and plunge the world into despair!
[23:51] kusa
    Next time: Love Wanders!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love Wanders!
[23:53] kusa
    Conquest!

Season 1

8 - Love Wanders

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Keep out!
[00:10] komi
    My name is Komi Shou.
SIGN    Komi Shou
[00:13] komi
    I'm a second year student at Binan High School,
[00:15] komi
    but for certain reasons, I became a shut-in.
SIGN    12. Anonymous Shut-in
    I hate it when people talk to
    me when I'm clearly reading
SIGN    22. Anonymous Shut-in
    It's funny how they
    always come late to meetings
SIGN    23. Anonymous Shut-in
    My friend's really picky
    about food, won't eat any meat
SIGN    32. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>23
    He probably has another
    reason for that, right?
SIGN    50. Anonymous Shut-in
    Everyone around me are good people.
    They're all working really hard.
SIGN    51. Anonymous Shut-in
    Oh, that's cool ^^
SIGN    65. Anonymous Shut-in
    Friends are a pain in the ass anyway.
    I cut myself off from them (lololololol)
[00:23] komi
    Are you me?
SIGN    65. Anonymous Shut-in
    Friends are a pain in the ass anyway.
    I cut myself off from them (lololololol)
SIGN    168. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>65
    Good for you, loner
SIGN    67. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>65
    Mop up those tears
SIGN    69. Anonymous Shut-in
    Don't get desperate on us...
SIGN    71. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>65
    You should probably take
    another look at yourself
SIGN    72. Anonymous Shut-in
    What happened, anyway?
SIGN    79. Anonymous Shut-in
    Probably nothing.
    I bet he's just sulking.
SIGN    83. Anonymous Shut-in
    Bet his friends were relieved, too.
SIGN    84. Anonymous Shut-in
    True
[00:35] komi
    Damn it! Damn it!
[00:36] komi
    Who needs friends?!
    I'm better off without them!
[00:41] komi
    I don't need...
[00:49] ari
    Good evening.
[00:53] komi
    I-I-Intruders!
[00:55] kusa
    We are not intruders.
[00:57] zun
    We are conquerors!
[00:59] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[01:04] trio
    Donum!
[01:14] komi
    I... I'll tear it all apart...
[01:17] komi
    That friendship crap...
[01:19] komi
    I'll tear it limb from limb!
SIGN    Love Wanders
[03:02] en
    Damn, if I'm late today,
    I'll get called to the faculty office.
[03:06] atsu
    So run faster, then!
SIGN    Delicious Life Campaign♥
[03:09] en
    Hey, sorry. Hang on a minute.
[03:12] en
    I'm gonna buy some bread.
[03:13] atsu
    Oh, what the heck?
SIGN    Delicious Life Campaign♥
[03:16] atsu
    I'm going on without you!
SIGN    Fresh-Baked Cream Bread
[03:42] en
    Don't leave me behind!
[03:44] atsu
    You scared me!
[03:45] en
    I felt so alone!
[03:46] atsu
    But I was going to be late!
[03:48] en
    So you're saying you don't care if I'm late?
[03:50] atsu
    But that's why I waited.
[03:51] en
    You didn't wait! You went!
[03:53] atsu
    I waited by walking slowly!
[03:56] atsu
    What's with you? This is a
    weird thing to pick a fight over.
[03:59] en
    You've been really cold lately.
[04:02] atsu
    What are you basing that on?
[04:04] atsu
    Didn't we have the most fun in history
    together over summer vacation?
[04:07] en
    Or maybe we actually got a little too close?
[04:10] atsu
    Why are you talking like such a pain in the ass?
[04:12] en
    That's right.
[04:14] en
    I guess I am a pain in the ass.
[04:17] atsu
    What's with you, En-chan?
[04:18] atsu
    Did you eat some poisonous
    mushrooms or something?
[04:21] en
    Just...
[04:22] en
    Stay away from me.
[04:24] ---
    Hey...
[04:25] atsu
    Wait!
[04:26] en
    Don't come this way!
[04:27] atsu
    I have to! I'm going to school, too!
[04:35] teach
    Kinugawa, you're late.
[04:36] atsu
    Oh, sorry.
[04:38] teach
    Anyway, never forget to check your own work.
[04:41] teach
    But at the same time, be prompt in—
[04:43] atsu
    Teacher! My stomach hurts,
    so I'm going to the nurse's office!
[04:46] teach
    Right after you got here?!
[04:47] atsu
    Did I do something wrong?
[04:53] en
    Not really.
[04:55] atsu
    Then is there a reason you said that stuff?
[04:58] en
    Not really.
[04:59] atsu
    Is it because the last time you came over,
[05:01] atsu
    I spent the whole time doing a jigsaw puzzle?
[05:03] en
    Not really.
[05:04] atsu
    "Not really" doesn't tell me anything.
[05:09] atsu
    Hey, c'mon!
[05:10] en
    Just leave me alone already!
[05:12] en
    It's really suffocating when you do that!
[05:18] atsu
    Fine.
[05:29] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[05:35] en
    Disappear!
[05:39] en
    Someone kill me!
[05:39] ryuu
    Hey, what are you standing there for?
[05:42] ryuu
    Whoa, what's he doing?
[05:43] io
    Is this a new exercise of some kind?
[05:46] four
    A fight?!
[05:48] ryuu
    With Kinugawa-senpai,
    who you're always so close with?
[05:50] io
    How come?
[05:51] en
    I don't know. Maybe it's menopause?
[05:54] io
    Your face does look old,
    but isn't it a bit early for that?
[05:56] en
    They say men go through
    menopause too, you know.
[05:58] ryuu
    You're not even sure if you're
    done with puberty yet.
[06:00] en
    Oh, I want to disappear!
[06:02] ryuu
    See, that kind of thing is definitely puberty.
[06:04] yumoto
    Why not just say you're sorry and make up?
[06:08] en
    It's nice that you can
    take everything so lightly.
[06:10] wom
    I agree that a prompt
    apology is the best strategy!
[06:14] wom
    Spaces without love render the heart empty!
[06:17] en
    Even Wombat is lecturing me...
[06:22] en
    That pitch... He's coming!
[06:28] ryuu
    Yo.
[06:29] io
    Hello there.
[06:30] atsu
    Hey.
[06:31] yumoto
    Lunch?
[06:32] yumoto
    I'm about to get started, too!
[06:34] ryuu
    Yeah, on your second.
[06:40] atsu
    No, I'll eat in the cafeteria today.
[06:42] atsu
    I just came to pick up something I forgot.
[06:44] atsu
    Later.
[06:46] yumoto
    Hey, is it true you had a
    fight with En-chan-senpai?
[06:50] both
    Right to the point?!
[06:52] atsu
    I don't know about a fight.
    I think he's just sulking.
[06:58] yumoto
    Then you should go offer to
    make up with him, Atsushi-senpai!
[07:04] atsu
    I'd better pass for now.
[07:07] atsu
    Sometimes it's best to let sleeping dogs lie.
[07:12] en
    Are you really okay with that?!
[07:15] atsu
    En-cha—
[07:15] en
    You should care more about me!
    Be more persistent!
[07:18] atsu
    That's totally different
    from what you said before!
[07:19] en
    You're really cold for someone
    whose name means "warm," you know.
[07:22] atsu
    Don't bring my name into this!
    I'm really worried about you!
[07:24] ryuu
    Hey, hey...
[07:24] atsu
    Am I suffocating you, or do you
    want me to care more? Which is it?
[07:26] en
    Both! Humans are contradictory, after all!
[07:30] atsu
    That's a pain in the ass!
[07:31] en
    Yeah, that's right!
[07:32] yumoto
    Hey, c'mon, cut it out!
[07:34] atsu
    Don't worry, Yumoto.
    It's between me and En-chan.
[07:38] en
    That's just it.
[07:39] en
    Why can't you be that
    thoughtful with me, I wonder?
[07:42] atsu
    I'm trying to be nice to you, too.
[07:45] en
    Is that so?
[07:46] en
    I know the excitement you show in
    the emails you send to me and Yumoto
[07:51] en
    are on totally different levels!
[07:56] en
    Your replies to me are always
    less than five words long!
[07:58] atsu
    Unlike yours, Yumoto's emails
[08:00] atsu
    aren't just bare-bones random
    sentences with no punctuation!
[08:03] atsu
    Plus, they come attached
    with excited emoticons!
[08:05] atsu
    Don't you think I should
    respond to that in kind?
[08:08] atsu
    By the way, have you been
    stealing my phone to look at it?!
[08:08] en
    The presence or absence of
    emoticons shows your favoritism!
[08:11] en
    Send me emails with emoticons sometimes!
[08:13] atsu
    Then send me emails of
    a decent length sometimes!
[08:16] atsu
    So have you been looking
    at my phone or not? Well?
[08:16] io
    I guess this is a fight, but...
[08:18] en
    What if I have?!
[08:19] ryuu
    It's the type it doesn't
    pay to interfere with, right?
[08:19] atsu
    I'd say you're a jerk!
[08:20] en
    Then say it! Show your
    contempt for how pathetic I am!
[08:22] atsu
    So you admit it, you jerk!
[08:24] yumoto
    U-Um, you guys...
[08:27] yumoto
    Why not leave it at that and have lunch?
[08:29] both
    No, thanks.
SIGN    Binan High School
[08:55] yumoto
    I've got to get them to make up somehow.
[08:58] ryuu
    Three girls a day... No, day and night...
[09:01] io
    To cut my losses or not?
[09:03] wom
    I have it! Here!
[09:07] io
    Stop making noise.
[09:08] ryuu
    You're not cut out for that.
[09:09] yumoto
    Come on, everyone, think seriously!
[09:12] ryuu
    There are things you think seriously about?
[09:14] io
    Those two will probably be fine,
    even if we don't worry about it.
[09:18] yumoto
    They won't be fine at all!
[09:20] yumoto
    They said they didn't even want lunch!
[09:22] yumoto
    You can't say you don't want food!
[09:24] yumoto
    It's a serious affair!
[09:25] ryuu
    Yeah, Yumoto never changes.
[09:28] yumoto
    I keep thinking, but it
    just makes my head hurt!
[09:31] yumoto
    I'm gonna go!
[09:32] wom
    Where?
[09:33] yumoto
    To see them!
[09:37] io
    Such determination...
    Maybe we should learn from him.
SIGN    Kusatsu Kinshiro
    Born September 12th
    Blood Type A / Virgo
    Hobbies: Archery
    Likes: Sanjusangendo Temple,
    Kintsuba, Amanatto
[09:48] kusa
    What?
[09:49] kusa
    Kinugawa and that guy?
[09:51] ari
    It seems so.
[09:52] gero
    Currently, Kinugawa is walking
    to and from school by himself.
[09:56] ari
    Yufuin comes to school,
    but he barely attends class,
[10:00] ari
    and I'm told that even when they
    cross paths, they don't speak.
[10:04] kusa
    I see.
[10:09] gero
    Th-That's good, is it?
[10:12] ari
    However,
[10:14] ari
    the first year boy, Hakone Yumoto-kun,
[10:17] ari
    is attempting to get them to reconcile.
[10:20] gero
    I really dislike that little fluff-head.
[10:22] gero
    He appears to lack any delicacy.
[10:25] zun
    It seems the effects of the monster we
    controlled are finally showing themselves.
[10:31] zun
    This time, by placing the monster in an
    establishment that humans use frequently,
[10:36] zun
    we can distribute the negative
    energy with greater efficiency.
[10:40] ari
    And the stronger the friendship,
    the greater the effect.
[10:44] gero
    Fight-causing radio waves.
[10:46] zun
    If we continue to destroy the bonds
    between those who are close...
[10:51] kusa
    Then we shall acquire the
    wonderful world we've always wanted!
[10:55] ari
    It's catching. The speech pattern is catching.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[11:00] yumoto
    How am I going to get them to make up?
[11:03] ryuu
    If you're too persistent, won't it
    just make the problem worse?
[11:08] io
    Just telling them to make up
    over and over lacks subtlety.
[11:11] yumoto
    It's not just that!
[11:13] yumoto
    I also asked what we're going to do
    about the Battle Lovers and stuff.
[11:16] wom
    Wh-What?
[11:18] en
    I quit. It's a pain in the ass.
[11:20] en
    Actually, it's always been a pain in the ass.
[11:22] atsu
    I'll help out if you really need me,
[11:24] atsu
    but I might not feel like
    transforming for a while.
[11:28] yumoto
    ...they said.
[11:29] wom
    I've had enough!
[11:31] wom
    Is it always going to be one step forward
    and one step back with you people?!
[11:34] ryuu
    It's because you forced us to transform
    without giving us time to object.
[11:37] wom
    But to begin with,
    I've been smelling it for a while.
[11:40] wom
    The scent of some kind of
    advanced scientific technology plot!
[11:44] yumoto
    You're saying a monster is behind this?
[11:45] wom
    Bingo!
[11:47] io
    But we haven't received one
    of those unpleasant alarms.
[11:50] wom
    It could be too weak to detect,
    or it could be a momentary power.
[11:54] ryuu
    A stealth monster, huh?
[11:56] yumoto
    Okay!
[11:57] yumoto
    In that case, I'll go over the
    school with a fine-toothed comb!
[12:01] ryuu
    Why are you so determined
    to do that kind of legwork?
[12:04] io
    Running around randomly won't do any good.
[12:06] yumoto
    But if we beat the monster, they'll make up!
[12:09] yumoto
    I can't just stand around!
[12:10] io
    If we consider people who might have
    been affected by this, I do have a lead.
[12:15] ryuu
    Kikuchi and Akutagawa from class A, right?
[12:16] io
    So you noticed?
[12:18] ryuu
    They've been arguing since that day, too, right?
[12:20] yumoto
    Where are you going?
[12:22] io
    To search for a monster.
[12:24] ryuu
    Using our heads.
[12:29] aku
    He's the one who decided to go shopping,
[12:31] aku
    but once he got back
    from the convenience store,
[12:33] aku
    he got all angry, like, "what am I, your gofer?"
[12:36] guy
    I was reading Chanporon
    at the convenience store,
[12:39] guy
    when he looked over at me and laughed.
[12:41] guy
    And it occurred to me maybe
    he was actually a Makachin fan,
[12:43] guy
    and suddenly I couldn't stand it...
[12:45] triplets
    Our friend went to the convenience store and...
[12:48] guy
    I was at the convenience store when...
[12:50] guy
    It was at the convenience store.
[12:52] ryuu
    The enemy's a convenience store?
[12:53] io
    It... seems so.
[12:55] yumoto
    I'm gonna go check!
[12:57] yumoto
    Atsushi-senpai! Atsushi-senpai!
[12:59] yumoto
    Atsushi-sen-pai-sen!
[13:01] atsu
    Paisen?
[13:03] yumoto
    Did you go to the convenience store near
    the school before your fight started?
[13:07] atsu
    How did you know that?
[13:08] yumoto
    You did?!
[13:10] atsu
    En-chan went in to buy some bread.
[13:13] yumoto
    That must be it!
[13:14] yumoto
    The culprit is in the convenience store!
[13:16] yumoto
    Spontaneous Love Making!
[13:42] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[13:43] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[13:46] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[13:49] yumoto
    Oh, wait, it's just me!
[13:52] yumoto
    Atsushi-senpai, I...
[13:54] yumoto
    I swear I'll get you two to make up!
[14:01] atsu
    It was a monster, then?
[14:07] yumoto
    Pardon me!
[14:09] owner
    Welcome—
[14:10] owner
    Cosplay?
[14:11] yumoto
    Is there a monster here?
[14:13] owner
    A... monster?
[14:14] owner
    No, I'm afraid we don't carry those here.
[14:17] yumoto
    That's weird. This has to be the place.
[14:24] owner
    Oh, that's my son.
[14:26] owner
    He's taking time off from school...
[14:29] yumoto
    I've got it!
[14:30] yumoto
    Above the convenience store!
[14:35] yumoto
    This is it! Pardon me!
[14:41] yumoto
    What a big kotatsu...
[14:46] monster
    Who are you?
[14:49] yumoto
    Come out of there! I'm gonna love you!
[14:51] monster
    No!
[14:53] yumoto
    It's not good for you to stay locked up all day!
[14:55] monster
    No!
[14:57] yumoto
    Damn. In this case...
[15:03] yumoto
    Love Stick!
[15:07] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[15:12] ryuu
    Huh? Where's Yumoto?
[15:13] atsu
    Is there a monster?
[15:14] io
    No...
[15:22] yumoto
    Did I go a little overboard?
[15:32] en
    What's that?
[15:37] en
    They're...
[15:43] monster
    Ow, ow...
[15:45] monster
    Th-The school...
[15:49] yumoto
    What?
[15:50] monster
    School...
[15:52] monster
    No!
[15:55] monster
    I hate school!
[15:57] ryuu
    Look out!
[16:04] yumoto
    This guy's stronger than he looks!
[16:05] ryuu
    And he keeps getting bigger!
[16:07] io
    He's the type that gets harder to
    control as he gets angry, I guess.
[16:11] atsu
    Give back En-chan!
[16:15] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[16:21] monster
    What?
[16:23] atsu
    Give back my can't-be-bothered, listless En-chan!
[16:37] yumoto
    Epinard!
[16:50] io
    What?
[16:51] yumoto
    Cerulean-senpai!
[16:54] atsu
    Cerulean...
[16:55] en
    You need to eat more! You're too light!
[16:57] atsu
    Huh?!
[16:59] yumoto
    Yay! He's back to normal
    even though we haven't beaten it!
[17:02] en
    I'm not back!
[17:04] en
    I'm not back...
[17:06] en
    Even now, I'm really pissed off.
[17:09] yumoto
    Then why...?
[17:11] en
    I might be pissed off...
    But even more than that...
[17:14] en
    I'm furious at myself for nearly losing
    my best friend to such a stupid fight!
[17:29] monster
    D-Don't say "best friend"...
[17:32] monster
    It's embarrassing!
[17:38] atsu
    Cerulean!
[17:40] monster
    Nyah nyah!
[17:41] en
    What's embarrassing?
[17:44] en
    Yourself, because you can't
    call a best friend a best friend?
[17:50] monster
    You piss me off!
[17:56] en
    You idiot!
[18:00] en
    Hey!
[18:02] atsu
    I get it.
[18:03] atsu
    This does make me want to pick a fight.
[18:07] en
    Atsushi...
[18:09] atsu
    But...
[18:11] atsu
    Not right now!
[18:16] en
    That's right!
[18:41] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[18:43] en
    Cerulean Aqua!
[18:50] monster
    Why? Why didn't my radio waves work on you?
[18:54] en
    Hey! Use the Love Attack!
[18:56] yumoto
    Huh? Oh, roger that!
[18:59] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[19:02] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[19:04] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[19:07] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[19:09] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[19:14] yumoto
    This time, you two can
    deal out the finishing move!
[19:17] en
    Okay, let's do it!
[19:24] both
    Love Attack!
[19:38] monster
    So... So cold...
[19:40] monster
    My blanket...
[19:43] en
    The cold you feel is something
    no blanket can stave off.
[19:47] atsu
    You understand that too, don't you?
[19:51] both
    Love Shower!
[20:00] monster
    What is this sensation?
[20:04] monster
    Comfort... Healing...
[20:06] monster
    I see... so this is... love.
[20:12] both
    Love is over.
[20:15] both
    Huh?
[20:16] ryuu
    Isn't that the transfer student, Komi?
[20:19] yumoto
    You know him?
[20:20] ryuu
    Yeah.
[20:21] ryuu
    He transferred here at the end of the first term.
[20:24] io
    At the beginning of the second term,
    he was out of school with the flu...
[20:26] ryuu
    And he just stopped coming after that.
[20:29] io
    His house is above a
    convenience store, right?
[20:31] en
    Hey.
[20:35] en
    I'm really sorry!
[20:37] en
    I'm really, really sorry!
[20:39] en
    I know I wasn't myself,
    but I was totally messed up!
[20:41] atsu
    No, no, I'm the one who should apologize.
[20:43] atsu
    I didn't even notice a monster was behind it.
[20:45] en
    No, no, it's still my fault.
[20:47] atsu
    No, no, I'm at fault, too.
[20:49] en
    No, no, no, I'm triple at fault.
[20:51] atsu
    No, no, I'm at fault cubed.
[20:51] yumoto
    I feel like everything I did was wasted effort.
[20:53] en
    No, no, no, no...
[20:54] yumoto
    Oh well! It worked out okay!
[20:57] ryuu
    Not a care in the world, huh?
[20:58] io
    Maybe we should learn from him.
[21:00] en
    Hey, don't cling to me.
[21:02] atsu
    You're heavy!
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:10] yumoto
    That's right, I've been
    completely forgetting my cuddles!
[21:13] yumoto
    I'm sorry!
[21:15] wom
    I wish you'd forgotten them forever!
[21:17] ryuu
    Komi said his house was so old,
    it was due for a remodeling anyway.
[21:21] io
    That's very convenient...
    I mean, quite a silver lining.
[21:25] ryuu
    Once his house is cleaned up,
    he says he'll have some friends over.
[21:28] io
    That's nice.
[21:30] io
    Even so...
[21:32] en
    No, no. It's my fault
    for erasing your save data.
[21:35] atsu
    No, no. It's my fault for getting
    to level 100 on a game you owned.
[21:38] en
    No, no. It's my fault for getting
    potato chips all over your bed.
[21:41] atsu
    No, no. It's my fault for secretly
    swapping my seat with yours in class
[21:44] atsu
    just because mine was wobbly.
[21:45] en
    What, seriously?
[21:46] en
    No, no. It's my fault for secretly
    looking at your cell phone.
[21:47] both
    How long will they keep that up
    before they're satisfied?
[21:48] atsu
    Actually, yeah.
[21:49] en
    Fine, I won't do it anymore.
[21:51] wom
    I'm done for!
[21:56] atsu
    En-chan, you're incredible.
[21:58] en
    How so?
[21:59] atsu
    You did something I could never do,
    and totally offhanded. It's amazing.
[22:02] en
    What's with you? What is it you want?
[22:05] en
    Fruit milk?
[22:06] atsu
    No, I already got some.
[23:41] ari
    You know, people don't look at
    you as much as you think they do.
[23:44] ari
    Not that it matters to me at all.
[23:46] ari
    Hey, let's eat some melon.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is Stronger than Pride
[23:48] ari
    Next time: Love is Stronger than Pride.
[23:51] ari
    Conquest!

Season 1

9 - Love is Stronger than Pride

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Student Council Room
[00:09] kusa
    Arima. Be quiet.
[00:11] ari
    Oh, sorry. Shall I make some tea?
[00:14] kusa
    If I want some, I'll tell you.
[00:15] gero
    Is it because second term's starting?
[00:18] gero
    Is it because of them?
[00:20] gero
    Is that why you're feeling grumpy, President?
[00:23] kusa
    You're calling me grumpy?
[00:25] kusa
    Have I done something to
    annoy you, Gero Akoya-kun?
[00:31] gero
    You only use my last name like that
    when you're feeling grumpy, President.
[00:36] kusa
    I'm afraid you're wrong about that, Gero-kun.
[00:39] ari
    Oh, I know!
[00:41] ari
    I'll bring out the dacquoise
    I've been holding on to.
[00:44] kusa
    No.
[00:44] gero
    No thank you.
[00:45] ari
    But at times like this...
[00:47] kusa
    What do you mean...
[00:48] gero
    ..."times like this"?
[00:49] ari
    Oh... Well...
[00:51] both
    What is it?
[00:52] zun
    I have had enough of this!
[00:55] zun
    Members of the Caerula Adamas.
[00:57] zun
    Our Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms
    Project has reached a serious problem.
[01:02] zun
    We still have not identified the enemy,
[01:04] zun
    and they block every one of our plans.
[01:07] kusa
    Our most recent plan, as well...
[01:10] kusa
    It means our present strategy is not effective.
[01:14] zun
    Aurite is correct.
[01:16] zun
    I cannot afford to waste any more of
    my precious Zundar Needles like this.
[01:20] zun
    We must fundamentally rethink our strategy.
[01:23] ari
    Precious?
[01:24] gero
    Fundamentally?
[01:25] zun
    That's right!
[01:27] zun
    Instead of waiting for them to appear,
    we shall go on the offensive!
[01:30] kusa
    Go on the offensive?
[01:33] zun
    A new development awaits us!
SIGN    Love is Stronger than Pride
[03:15] guy
    It happened before, too.
    He does such weird things by himself.
[03:19] guy
    He really can't read the mood.
[03:22] guy
    Or maybe it's that he doesn't read the mood?
[03:24] ---
    Yeah, could be...
[03:26] uri
    What are they talking about?
[03:28] uri
    No, who are they talking about?
SIGN    Makuwa Uriya
[03:31] uri
    What kind of person must one be
[03:33] uri
    to come up in their conversation?
[03:35] uri
    The bold type that doesn't read
    the mood, but pretends he just can't?
[03:38] uri
    The self-centered type that can't read
    the mood, but pretends he just doesn't?
[03:42] uri
    A hybrid between them?
[03:44] uri
    I only know one person like that.
[03:48] uri
    Someone who, despite caring what others think,
[03:50] uri
    views showing that interest as a sign of failure.
[03:53] uri
    Yes.
[03:54] uri
    That is...
[03:56] guy
    Should we go?
[03:57] guy
    Let's go.
[04:00] uri
    I know. I really do know.
[04:03] uri
    I'm excessively self-conscious.
[04:06] uri
    No one really cares what I do.
[04:08] uri
    No, I'm the one who's
    weird for caring about that.
[04:10] uri
    Actually, it's caring about it that
    makes me excessively self-conscious.
[04:13] uri
    I feel like my mind's racing in circles.
[04:15] uri
    Do I want to care or not?
[04:17] uri
    Do I want to act like I care or not?
[04:19] uri
    And should* I care or not?
[04:21] aur
    Makuwa Uriya.
[04:23] arg
    Monster of ego.
[04:24] per
    You'll make an appropriate
    servant to the Caerula Adamas.
[04:29] uri
    What's going on? Is this a delusion?
[04:32] uri
    Or a prank?
[04:34] uri
    No, it must be a delusion.
[04:35] uri
    After all, I'm not exactly famous
    enough to be the subject of a prank.
[04:39] uri
    But what if, by chance, someone films
    this and the video is put on the internet,
[04:40] kusa
    Aurum!
[04:41] ari
    Argentum!
[04:43] gero
    Perla!
[04:43] uri
    and this becomes my world debut,
    and I become surprisingly popular?
[04:47] trio
    Donum!
[04:50] uri
    That's right!
[04:51] uri
    I'm not some ordinary gourd (uri),
    but a special melon!
[04:54] uri
    Yes, a muskmelon!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[05:06] ryuu
    Hey!
[05:07] ryuu
    So who came up with the name
    "Earth Defense Club," anyway?
[05:10] atsu
    Who knows? It's been called that
    since I started coming here.
[05:14] ryuu
    Well, not like it matters.
[05:16] en
    If it doesn't matter, don't ask.
[05:17] ryuu
    Yufuin-senpai, is that manga interesting?
[05:21] en
    Occasionally.
[05:22] ryuu
    Which means it's usually boring, then?
[05:25] io
    Sounds like your relationships with girls.
[05:28] ryuu
    Occasionally interesting.
[05:30] ryuu
    The memories are priceless.
[05:32] io
    Don't make me laugh.
[05:34] en
    I'm impressed you two can hang out.
[05:37] ryuu
    You're saying that, Yufuin-senpai?
[05:39] en
    What does that mean?
[05:41] atsu
    You mean me and En-chan?
[05:43] en
    Speaking of which, why
    do you hang out with me?
[05:47] atsu
    You're asking that?
[05:49] ---
    Yeah.
[05:50] atsu
    Why...? It just went that way, I guess?
[05:53] en
    Wow. That's mean.
[05:54] atsu
    You asking me why was pretty mean, too.
[05:57] en
    Well, to me, Atsushi, you're basically air.
[06:01] atsu
    Is that a compliment?
[06:02] en
    It's a huge compliment.
[06:04] atsu
    Is it?
[06:09] yumoto
    Yo!
[06:10] en
    Why are you coming in from there?
[06:12] yumoto
    And down!
[06:14] yumoto
    I think a change of mood is a good thing sometimes.
[06:16] atsu
    What do you mean, change of mood?
[06:18] atsu
    I'd really like to hear about this.
[06:20] yumoto
    Just kidding. It's a joke.
[06:22] yumoto
    It's because Wombat ran away!
[06:24] en
    He should just give up and
    surrender himself to you already.
[06:27] yumoto
    That's right!
[06:29] ryuu
    What do you even like about that bristly thing?
[06:31] io
    He stinks, too.
[06:33] wom
    I am not bristly, nor do I stink!
[06:37] yumoto
    Oh, now look! Wom-san is pouting! Poor thing!
[06:42] yumoto
    Well, I'm still on your side, okay?
[06:45] en
    But if Yumoto was chasing you,
    why did you show up after he did?
[06:50] atsu
    And where's Mr. Tawarayama?
[06:53] atsu
    Did you leave him again?
[06:54] wom
    He's right here!
[06:56] en
    Hey, rigor mortis is setting in!
[06:58] atsu
    Who hung that bag on him?
[07:00] yumoto
    Oh, that's mine!
[07:02] en
    I wish you'd share a hundredth of the concern
    you have for Wombat with Mr. Tawarayama.
[07:10] wom
    It's the Love Alert!
[07:13] en
    I'm sick of arguing about
    whether we should go or not.
[07:15] en
    Might as well just go.
[07:17] atsu
    Let's zip over there and zip right back.
[07:19] wom
    Stop treating this like a rush job!
[07:27] en
    There he is!
[07:29] melon
    I've been waiting, Battle Lovers!
[07:33] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[07:36] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[07:38] io
    Love is all!
[07:40] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[07:43] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[07:45] five
    Battle Lovers!
[07:48] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[07:50] five
    Of love!
[07:52] yumoto
    Now, let's go right to the Love Attack!
[07:55] melon
    Why don't we have a little talk?
[07:57] yumoto
    A talk? About the jealousy, envy,
    and inferiority you feel towards us?
[08:02] melon
    Yes, that might make a good theme.
[08:05] melon
    Jealousy, pity, and envy are three of a kind,
    cooking poison in the same pot.
[08:10] en
    What? Is today's monster a wannabe scholar?
[08:14] en
    Epinard, I leave this sort of
    self-sufficient type to you.
[08:18] atsu
    Huh? Why?
[08:19] en
    It seems like your strong point.
[08:21] yumoto
    I'll beat him down with my
    unique communication skills!
[08:26] atsu
    You can't call it communication
    if you're trying to beat him down.
[08:29] atsu
    First, we have to be quiet and hear his side.
[08:31] yumoto
    Huh? Grumble grumble.
[08:33] atsu
    Don't say "grumble grumble."
[08:35] en
    So what do you have to say?
[08:39] melon
    The "Andes" in "Andes melon" doesn't
    refer to the Andes Mountains.
SIGN    Scroll of Riddles
[08:44] melon
    Did you know that?
[08:47] melon
    The "Andes" in "Andes Melon" doesn't
    refer to the Andes Mountains.
[08:50] melon
    The truth is...
[08:51] yumoto
    Yeah? Yeah?
[08:53] melon
    The "Prince" in "Prince melon"
    doesn't refer to royalty.
[08:56] melon
    The truth is...
[08:57] yumoto
    Yeah? Yeah?
[08:58] melon
    Melons are not really fruit. The truth is...
[09:02] yumoto
    Yeah? Yeah?
[09:04] melon
    Are you interested?
[09:06] melon
    If you want to know the truth, you'll
    have to come to Mt. Binan on Sunday.
[09:12] melon
    We shall meet again, friends of my soul!
[09:15] yumoto
    What, you're not gonna tell us now?
[09:17] yumoto
    No fair!
[09:20] ryuu
    The "Andes" in "Andes melon"
[09:23] ryuu
    comes from "anshin desu" (don't worry)
    with the core (shin) removed.
[09:26] ryuu
    A play on the fact that it's a melon with seeds.
[09:28] ---
    Wow!
[09:29] ryuu
    The "Prince" in "Prince melon"
[09:31] ryuu
    is named after the group that
    developed the seeds in a lab.
[09:34] ---
    Wow!
[09:36] ryuu
    "Fruit," according to the Ministry
    of Agriculture and Forestry,
[09:39] ryuu
    is something that grows into a tree,
[09:40] ryuu
    whereas melons are herbaceous,
    growing at the soil level,
[09:43] ryuu
    which makes them fruit-like vegetables.
[09:45] ---
    Wow!
[09:47] ryuu
    By the way, the "musk" in "muskmelon"
[09:49] ryuu
    doesn't come from the fact
    that it appears to have a mask,
[09:50] en
    You can look up anything on
    the internet nowadays, huh?
[09:53] ryuu
    but because it produces a
    strong aroma known as "musk."
[09:54] atsu
    And that monster seemed so confident
    as it threw those riddles at us.
[09:56] ---
    Wow! Wow!
[09:58] ryuu
    One other thing: the mesh pattern
    of a muskmelon is scars!
[10:02] ryuu
    It's because of fractures that occur in
    the rind as the fruit within is growing.
[10:06] yumoto
    Wow!
[10:08] en
    I wish the monster could have seen that "Wow!"
[10:12] atsu
    He probably would've been
    pretty pleased with himself.
[10:14] io
    He probably thought he could lure
    out someone like Yumoto that way.
[10:19] yumoto
    Lure me out? What do you mean, Io-senpai?
[10:22] io
    Yumoto, you really are carefree.
[10:26] io
    Listen to me. The enemy's plan is...
[10:29] zun
    To set a trap for them and strike!
[10:31] zun
    That is our plan this time!
[10:33] kusa
    We've been one step
    behind them all this time.
[10:36] zun
    This time, we shall annihilate the enemy.
[10:39] zun
    It's a truly delicious idea.
[10:43] ari
    By the way, Lord Zundar.
[10:45] ari
    Is that thing you're eating right now a sn—
[10:48] kusa
    Is that escargot?
[10:50] ari
    No, it's a snail!
[10:55] zun
    The foods of Earth are delicious.
[10:58] zun
    This time, at last, our victory is assured!
[11:02] wom
    An ambush?!
[11:04] wom
    What a lovelessly dirty trick!
[11:07] ryuu
    Regardless of the ambush,
    just getting there would be a pain.
[11:11] yumoto
    You mean you guys aren't planning to go?
[11:15] ryuu
    You're saying you are planning to go?
[11:16] yumoto
    Well, he did say, "We shall meet again!"
    We solved his melon riddles, but still...
[11:21] ryuu
    How far are you willing
    to go to humor someone?
[11:23] en
    It's not like we told him we'd go, so we're safe.
[11:26] io
    That's right.
[11:28] ---
    What?
[11:28] wom
    Wait a minute!
[11:30] wom
    The heirs to the throne of love,
    the Battle Lovers, can't simply—
[11:33] en
    But it'll be tiring, and baths cost money.
[11:36] atsu
    You can't spend money you don't have.
[11:40] io
    Why are you looking at me?
[11:42] en
    I think Wombat's trying to
    ask you to pay our way there.
[11:46] io
    Now, look...
[11:47] ryuu
    If you try to borrow money from Io,
    your friendship with him is over.
[11:51] wom
    In this situation, I suppose that cannot be helped.
[11:54] wom
    In the name of love—
[11:55] io
    Are you saying friendship isn't love?!
[11:59] kino
    In that case, I know a very good way!
SIGN    Arima Ibushi
    Born November 10th
    Blood Type AB / Scorpio
    Hobbies: Backgammon
    Likes: Gardening,
    carbonated rice crackers
[12:10] ryuu
    Ugh, it's you! Where did you come from?
[12:13] kino
    How rude of me!
[12:14] kino
    I overheard your conversation.
[12:17] en
    Overheard...?
[12:19] kino
    If you're having money troubles,
[12:21] kino
    our Press Society feels it is of
    pressing urgency to come to your aid!
[12:27] atsu
    Press Society...
[12:28] ryuu
    ...and pressing urgency?
[12:30] en
    Was that a joke?
[12:31] kino
    We have a very good idea.
[12:33] kino
    A surefire way to make a fortune in no time!
[12:36] yumoto
    What is it?
[12:37] kino
    Do you remember?
[12:39] kino
    Our Press Society published your Earth
    Defense Club activities on the internet.
[12:44] atsu
    Well, yeah...
[12:46] en
    That's right, that did happen.
[12:48] kino
    That article was a big hit!
SIGN    Yumoto-kun's cuuuuuute!
SIGN    Yes, he's an angel!
SIGN    En is way too hot
SIGN    Atsushiiiiiiiiii
[12:51] kino
    Right now, you all are internet idols!
SIGN    Io-kun Io-kun Io-kun Io-kun
SIGN    Yumoto-kun Yumoto-kun Yumoto-kun
SIGN    I love glasses!
[12:54] all
    Huh?!
[12:56] atsu
    Internet idols?
[12:57] atsu
    Isn't that term a little vague?
[13:01] en
    I know the words "internet" and "idols,"
[13:03] en
    but when you put them together,
    suddenly it all feels very indeterminate.
[13:07] kino
    Don't think about it too hard!
[13:09] kino
    The point is, you're popular!
[13:13] kino
    I've received a lot of requests for more
    coverage of that five-man hottie group!
[13:19] yumoto
    You want us to do something
    to Mr. Tawarayama again?
[13:22] kino
    No, no, no! I'm speaking more of gravure.
[13:27] all
    Gravure?!
[13:28] kino
    If you agree to be my models...
[13:33] kino
    I could probably pay you this much.
[13:36] atsu
    No way!
[13:37] io
    That's not possible!
    Are you trying to scam us?
[13:40] kino
    Do not underestimate your own popularity!
[13:43] kino
    If you sell well, I might be
    able to pay you even more!
[13:46] yumoto
    Wow!
[13:48] kino
    Then, first, take these.
[13:54] taz
    Good! Good! Yumocchan, you're amazing!
[13:58] yumoto
    Oh, am I?
[13:59] taz
    Magnum!
[14:01] taz
    Great shot!
[14:02] taz
    Perfect!
[14:03] en
    Was the Press Society photographer
    always that kind of character?
[14:06] taz
    A little bit of blur...
[14:08] kino
    And now, the rest of you!
[14:18] taz
    Good! Nice! Yes, straighter!
[14:20] taz
    Right! Good!
[14:21] en
    Wait! This is all just cosplay!
[14:25] kino
    It's part of a plan to put pictures of the
    Earth Defense Club wearing various costumes
[14:29] kino
    in calendars and sell them like hotcakes!
[14:32] en
    Who would buy something like that?
[14:34] atsu
    You know, it's like those calendars with
    burly firemen and athletes in various poses.
[14:39] ryuu
    I've heard of those.
[14:40] io
    I feel vaguely like I've sold my soul.
[14:44] kino
    Money talks, even in hell.
[14:47] kino
    Well, would you like your receipt?
[14:50] kino
    As thanks for the photos.
[15:01] yumoto
    Those Press Society guys are really great!
[15:03] yumoto
    These rice balls are delicious!
[15:05] yumoto
    Thanks, big bro!
[15:07] yumoto
    Cards! I wanna play Old Maid!
[15:09] yumoto
    Then we'll play shiritori!
[15:11] yumoto
    And the Yamanote Line game!
[15:12] yumoto
    Oh, there's not enough time!
[15:14] en
    He's sure excited.
[15:16] ryuu
    Damn, persistent caller.
[15:18] io
    Did something happen?
[15:24] yumoto
    The air is so fresh!
[15:26] en
    We finally made it.
SIGN    Binan Mountain Station
[15:30] ryuu
    She doesn't believe I'm really
    away on club business.
[15:32] io
    That's only natural.
[15:34] ryuu
    That's so cold! Take a selfie with me, okay?
[15:37] io
    Sure, but won't she think it's
    just a badly shopped photo?
[15:44] ryuu
    Girls are cute, but they're
    really annoying at times.
[15:48] en
    Really? At times?
[15:50] ryuu
    Well, I think of the annoyance
    as part of their cuteness.
[15:53] en
    Amazing.
[15:54] en
    Anyway, so we have to climb this?
[16:01] atsu
    If someone says to meet on Mt. Binan,
    they'd normally mean the summit, right?
[16:07] en
    Can we transform?
[16:08] wom
    Oh? Have you finally recognized
    yourselves as the Battle Lovers?
[16:12] en
    No, but our physical skills increase
    when we transform, right?
[16:15] en
    I thought it'd make it a little easier.
[16:18] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[16:21] five
    Battle Lovers!
[16:23] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[16:25] five
    Of love!
[16:31] en
    Or so I thought, but I guess not.
[16:34] atsu
    En-chan, you never exercise effort,
    spirit, or endurance, do you?
[16:38] en
    Yeah. I'd rather be a lifetime idler.
[16:42] en
    That was close! What is this thing?
[16:44] atsu
    A sinkhole, maybe?
[16:47] en
    Now I'm even more tired.
[16:52] en
    By the way, Atsushi, what do
    you want to do in the future?
[16:55] atsu
    Me? I'm not sure.
[16:58] atsu
    Go to college and get a job
    like most people, I guess?
[17:01] atsu
    Io, are you going to the Cayman Islands?
[17:02] io
    There's no retiring from
    investment and management, after all.
[17:05] ryuu
    Well, I'm gonna become Hugh Hefner!
[17:07] io
    I don't know about that.
[17:09] yumoto
    I'm gonna become the world's
    #1 bath-firewood man!
[17:12] en
    Isn't your family's pubilc bath a natural hot spring?
[17:15] yumoto
    That's true, but "bath-washer man"
    doesn't have as nice a ring to it.
[17:19] ryuu
    What is all this, anyway?
[17:24] yumoto
    Hey!
[17:25] yumoto
    Hey, Melon Monster!
[17:29] yumoto
    We're here!
[17:32] melon
    Wh-What are you doing here?!
[17:34] yumoto
    You told us to come!
[17:36] melon
    Well, yes, but on the way up, I set all those...
[17:40] atsu
    Oh, you mean that survival action stuff?
[17:43] yumoto
    That was pretty fun! Thanks!
[17:46] ryuu
    No, I don't think he put
    those there for us to enjoy.
[17:49] yumoto
    Oh, really?
[17:53] melon
    You may be my enemy, but I am impressed!
[17:54] atsu
    Looks like he bounced back.
[17:57] melon
    You must be very interested in
    the melon riddles I threw at you.
[18:01] yumoto
    Yeah. Actually, we figured
    them all out using the internet.
[18:04] melon
    What?!
[18:05] yumoto
    "Anshin desu," the name of a group,
    and fruit-like vegetables.
[18:09] yumoto
    Also "musk" and scars.
[18:10] melon
    It can't be... No...
[18:12] melon
    You solved my melon riddles so easily?!
[18:15] yumoto
    Also, sorry...
[18:17] yumoto
    I'm the kind of person who doesn't really
    care if he gets melon after dinner or not.
[18:20] en
    Same here, actually.
[18:22] atsu
    It's just another gourd, anyway.
[18:24] ryuu
    I prefer cherries.
[18:26] ryuu
    Not American cherries, but Sato Nishiki.
[18:29] io
    Those are more expensive too, right?
[18:31] melon
    It can't be... You don't care about melons?
[18:36] melon
    It's melon, you know? That melon!
[18:38] yumoto
    Sorry.
[18:40] yumoto
    If you give me some, I will eat it, of course.
[18:42] melon
    What an apathetic reaction!
[18:44] melon
    You've shaken my entire raison d'etre!
[18:48] en
    He's suffering.
[18:50] atsu
    Really suffering.
[18:51] ryuu
    Why are you talking about
    "raison d'etre," anyway?
[18:55] melon
    J-Just kidding. I knew that, too.
[18:58] melon
    The melon is a relic of the past.
[19:01] melon
    I was just playing melon.
[19:03] melon
    Because they say melons are tops, you know?
[19:06] yumoto
    Playing melon? Melons are tops?
[19:08] melon
    In the same way bananas started
    to sell out in an instant,
[19:12] melon
    and the way people started to say that eggs
    are the honor student of foodstuffs,
[19:15] melon
    even thinking of melons as
    having value is a total anachronism.
[19:16] atsu
    Is this guy okay? He's getting
    into self-abuse now...
[19:20] melon
    I knew all that,
[19:21] melon
    but when you say that, it just makes
    people worry about you, you know?
[19:25] melon
    So the melon was just playing melon!
[19:28] en
    Who is he even talking to?
[19:30] ryuu
    Himself, I think?
[19:32] io
    He seems desperate to bounce back from this.
[19:34] melon
    I'm not special at all,
[19:36] melon
    but whether you're expecting
    me to be special or not,
[19:40] melon
    I'd still like to meet your expectations,
    or something like that.
[19:43] melon
    Have you ever met someone so willing to
    think things down two or three levels?
[19:48] melon
    Or something like that!
[19:49] yumoto
    What's he talking about?
[19:51] en
    In a word, he's excessively self-conscious?
[19:54] atsu
    That's likely.
[19:55] melon
    Likely?!
[20:00] yumoto
    I don't really understand, but don't sweat it.
[20:04] yumoto
    No worries!
[20:04] melon
    No worries?!
[20:06] yumoto
    That's right. We did come, after all.
[20:09] melon
    You took pity on me!
[20:11] yumoto
    This is a nice place. I'm glad we came.
[20:15] yumoto
    We owe you, Melon Monster.
[20:17] yumoto
    If not for you, I would never have
    given a second thought to melons.
[20:22] yumoto
    I'm glad.
[20:25] yumoto
    I like melon-flavored shaved ice and such.
[20:29] en
    And melon bread.
[20:30] atsu
    And melon soda, too.
[20:32] io
    The cheap stuff has its own appeal.
[20:34] ryuu
    And everything has its own flavor.
[20:49] melon
    So you don't mind a melon like me?
[20:52] yumoto
    Why would we mind?
[20:56] wom
    Everyone, now! Give him love!
[20:59] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[21:09] melon
    Ah, the synergistic effect
    of comfort and healing!
[21:12] melon
    100% fruit juice is soaking into my scars!
[21:15] melon
    I don't need to stay in a
    paulownia box any longer!
[21:21] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:25] zun
    The presence has disappeared.
[21:27] zun
    So he's been loved, as well?
[21:29] gero
    A shame.
[21:31] kusa
    Forgive us, Lord Zundar.
[21:33] kusa
    It seems our selection was ill-considered.
[21:35] zun
    But it did have a bit of an effect.
[21:38] ari
    Effect?
[21:39] zun
    Let's be satisfied with what we did for today.
[21:44] zun
    After we take a brief rest,
    we'll consider our next development.
[21:49] zun
    With that, I bid thee farewell!
[21:55] kino
    It looks like the gravure was popular.
[21:58] kino
    I hope this will translate into numbers, as well.
[22:02] kino
    Right?
[23:40] gero
    Isn't it true that the more a person
    thinks of himself as "cute,"
[23:43] gero
    the blacker his heart must be?
[23:45] gero
    How do I know that's true?
[23:47] gero
    Well, it's true of me, after all!
[23:50] gero
    Next time: Love is Glasses...
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is Glasses...
[23:53] gero
    Conquest!

Season 1

10 - Love is Glasses...

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ryuu
    Hey, that looks good. The daily special?
[00:07] io
    Yes. When it comes to lunch,
[00:09] io
    the cafeteria's daily special
    is definitely the way to go.
[00:11] io
    It's completely satisfactory in
    terms of both value and flavor.
[00:16] atsu
    You've been getting bread a lot, En-chan.
[00:18] en
    Yeah. Everything else is just a pain.
[00:21] atsu
    You should have some vegetables, too.
[00:23] atsu
    Want some of this stew?
[00:29] atsu
    Yumoto, is something wrong?
[00:32] yumoto
    I don't seem to have any appetite.
[00:36] ---
    What?!
[00:39] wom
    It's unusual for you to have no appetite...
[00:43] yumoto
    And today's the day my brother
    Gora makes lunch for me, too...
[00:49] en
    I guess unusual things do happen.
[00:52] yumoto
    Huh? Now that I look closer, En-chan-senpai,
    you have really long eyelashes...
[00:58] en
    Atsushi, he's acting weird.
[01:00] atsu
    Yeah, weird.
[01:02] megawa
    Oh, look out!
[01:04] yumoto
    Megawacchi...
[01:06] megawa
    Huh? Yumoto-kun, your face is red.
[01:09] atsu
    Now that you mention it...
[01:10] ryuu
    Megawacchi?
SIGN    Megawa Rui
[01:12] megawa
    I'm Yumoto-kun's classmate, Megawa Rui.
[01:16] megawa
    I'm the manager of the baseball club.
[01:18] megawa
    Nice to meet you!
[01:21] ryuu
    R-Right...
[01:23] megawa
    Yumoto-kun, do you have a cold?
    They're going around lately.
[01:26] yumoto
    But I've never caught a cold in my life.
[01:30] megawa
    Why don't we check your temperature? Hang on.
[01:33] megawa
    Here, a thermometer.
[01:35] atsu
    He's a manager, all right.
[01:40] megawa
    37°C?
[01:41] yumoto
    Huh?
[01:42] yumoto
    Wow! I've never reached 37°C before!
[01:46] yumoto
    No wonder I feel so lightheaded!
[01:49] atsu
    You feel lightheaded?
[01:51] yumoto
    Yep. And it's throbbing, too.
[01:54] io
    It does sound like a cold, then.
[01:56] ryuu
    But I've never seen anyone
    so happy about geting a cold.
[02:02] en
    Atsushi, Yumoto really is acting weird.
[02:05] atsu
    Yeah, he is.
[02:06] megawa
    Yumoto-kun, why not leave early?
[02:08] megawa
    Maybe you should just get some rest today.
[02:11] yumoto
    Yay! Leave early! Hooray!
[02:14] club
    Hey, Megawa.
[02:16] megawa
    Yes?
[02:17] megawa
    Well, I'll be going now. Take care!
[02:21] yumoto
    Bye-bye, Megawacchi!
[02:23] ryuu
    He seems like the really pleasant type.
[02:26] io
    I bet he's really popular.
[02:28] yumoto
    Bye-bye!
[02:31] megawa
    That's right. I have a very good,
    pleasant disposition.
[02:34] megawa
    I'm the #1 glasses boy first-year student
    that everyone wants as their manager.
[02:38] megawa
    In terms of cuteness, I'm easily a
    match for any glasses-girl character.
SIGN    Love is Glasses...
[04:21] en
    It seems like Yumoto-kun has a cold,
    so we brought him home.
[04:25] goro
    What? Yumoto has a cold?
[04:27] ryuu
    That's right.
[04:29] io
    He has a fever of 37°C.
[04:31] gora
    A fever?!
[04:33] gora
    Heat up a bath! A bath!
[04:35] en
    It's heated. This is a public bath, y'know.
[04:37] gora
    Ice! Go to the snowy mountains to pick up ice!
[04:40] atsu
    Isn't there ice in the freezer?
[04:41] ryuu
    Where did "snowy mountains"
    come from, anyway?
[04:45] gora
    That's right, onions!
[04:47] gora
    For a cold, you need onions!
[04:48] gora
    Cooked onions!
[04:50] io
    I don't get it.
[04:52] ryuu
    Why onions?
[04:53] yumoto
    Big bro Gora always says
    onions are good for a fever.
[04:58] en
    Really?
[05:00] atsu
    Is that a folk remedy or something?
[05:05] gora
    How's that, Yumoto?
[05:07] yumoto
    Stinks of onions.
[05:10] gora
    That's just fine.
[05:12] yumoto
    I think I'm getting sleepy.
[05:14] gora
    Sleep.
[05:15] yumoto
    Okay.
[05:17] atsu
    Kind of a strange sight, isn't it?
[05:20] en
    I get what you mean.
[05:22] gora
    My little brother has never once caught a cold.
[05:27] gora
    He must be overexerting himself somehow.
[05:30] atsu
    Well, he may have been a
    little busy with club activities.
[05:34] gora
    That doesn't explain such a high fever.
[05:37] ryuu
    No, it's a mild fever.
[05:38] io
    I think it's just an ordinary cold, myself.
[05:40] gora
    A cold is a gateway to all kinds of illnesses.
[05:43] gora
    For this to happen on my watch...
[05:46] en
    It's okay, big brother. The fever's low.
[05:50] atsu
    But I really am worried.
    For Yumoto to be stuck in bed...
[05:53] io
    They say fools don't catch colds, after all.
[05:55] ryuu
    He said it out loud!
[05:58] gora
    Yumoto, your big brother will save you!
[06:06] atsu
    That was some pretty
    amazing brotherly love, huh?
[06:09] en
    I guess the Yumoto doesn't fall far from the tree.
[06:11] wom
    Such a moving sight!
[06:14] wom
    The reason Yumoto-san so
    passionately dedicates himself to love
[06:17] wom
    is because of the deep love from his
    brother that envelops him every day!
[06:21] wom
    Oh, how I wish I could scout that
    brother for the Earth Defense Club!
[06:26] ryuu
    You're that impressed?
[06:27] io
    That's some show of emotion.
[06:30] wom
    I'm absolutely welling over with emotion!
[06:32] wom
    Although I am concerned
    about Yumoto-san's fever...
[06:37] ryuu
    Yo!
[06:38] io
    Good morning.
[06:40] en
    Hey.
[06:41] atsu
    Morning.
[06:42] yumoto
    Good day to you.
[06:46] yumoto
    Senpai. Good day to you.
[06:49] en
    "Good day to you"?
[06:50] ryuu
    What's with the glasses?
[06:52] yumoto
    Everything near me suddenly appeared too close.
[06:55] atsu
    Wait, you are Yumoto, right?
[06:56] yumoto
    Yes. I am Hakone Yumoto.
[06:59] yumoto
    Lovely weather today, isn't it?
[07:01] io
    By the way, has your fever gone down?
[07:04] yumoto
    I still have a fever,
[07:06] yumoto
    but my brother Gora brewed
    some medicinal herbs for me.
[07:09] yumoto
    I felt so pleasantly refreshed, I decided to come.
[07:12] atsu
    But if you still have a fever,
    you should rest, shouldn't you?
[07:16] ryuu
    Your brother must've been worried, too.
[07:18] yumoto
    I didn't tell him I was leaving,
    so he doesn't know.
[07:21] yumoto
    On such a pleasant day,
    I simply couldn't stay in bed.
[07:24] yumoto
    Well, excuse me!
[07:28] atsu
    Am I the only one who's bothered by that?
[07:30] en
    No, I think we're all bothered by that.
[07:33] io
    Yeah. Yumoto's character has changed, hasn't it?
[07:35] ryuu
    Do you think the fever knocked a screw loose?
[07:37] goro
    Yumoto, I cooked some more onion.
[07:42] gora
    Yumoto?
[07:47] yumoto
    Ah, the gentlemen of the
    Student Council. Good day to you.
[07:54] yumoto
    Has your morning meeting finished?
[07:56] ari
    Yes.
[07:58] yumoto
    I'm glad to hear it. You do such fine work.
[08:00] yumoto
    Pardon me.
[08:03] ari
    That was that first-year boy
    from the Defense Club, wasn't it?
[08:05] gero
    Yes. He's always been a rather strange boy.
[08:08] kusa
    Don't be led astray by fools.
[08:10] kusa
    Every minute spent thinking
    about them is wasted.
[08:12] gero
    That's true.
[08:13] ari
    Harsh.
[08:18] yumoto
    Oh, Megawacchi. Good day to you.
[08:22] yumoto
    Are you working hard at your
    morning practice as always?
[08:24] megawa
    Yeah.
[08:25] megawa
    Yumoto-kun, are you feeling better now?
[08:28] yumoto
    Yes. Thank you for yesterday.
[08:30] yumoto
    Well, I'll be going to the classroom now.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[08:55] atsu
    What brought this on all of a sudden?
[08:57] yumoto
    I've been concerned about
    the mess for some time.
[09:00] en
    You have?
[09:02] wom
    Magnificent, Yumoto-san!
[09:04] wom
    Cleaning is love that goes by the name "service"!
[09:07] yumoto
    Yes!
[09:09] ryuu
    What happened to him?
[09:11] io
    I don't know.
[09:13] en
    But his character has
    completely changed, hasn't it?
[09:16] atsu
    Yeah.
[09:17] atsu
    Actually, remember what his brother said?
[09:19] atsu
    "A cold is a gateway to all kinds of illnesses."
[09:21] io
    What about it?
[09:23] atsu
    You don't think Yumoto is
    going though that, do you?
[09:29] atsu
    The first fever he's had since he
    was born has overloaded his brain?!
[09:33] ryuu
    That's not possible. It was only 37°C.
[09:36] en
    But it might not be out of the question.
[09:38] io
    Yes. Maybe this is exactly what his
    brother was afraid would happen.
[09:42] yumoto
    Now...
[09:43] yumoto
    Teacher, I'll clean you up nicely, too.
[09:46] en
    What will we do if he stays like this?
[09:49] ryuu
    Scary.
[09:51] atsu
    But I wonder if he even can
    go back to the old Yumoto.
[09:54] io
    I don't know...
[09:56] wom
    I think things are better this way.
[09:59] wom
    When all is said and done,
    he's overflowing with love!
[10:04] en
    What happened?
[10:05] yumoto
    I was cleaning up, and the bookcase fell apart.
[10:08] atsu
    Oh, this was in pretty bad shape.
[10:11] io
    But Mr. Tawarayama's been...
[10:14] ryuu
    Teacher, hang in there!
[10:15] ryuu
    Wait, he's dead already...
[10:16] en
    Hey, look.
[10:19] en
    I didn't know there was a door here.
[10:26] gero
    Why are we remodeling all of a sudden?
[10:29] ari
    Just a bit of feng shui.
[10:32] gero
    I didn't know you were concerned
    with such things, Arima-san.
[10:34] ari
    I suppose I am.
[10:35] kusa
    But...
[10:38] kusa
    I didn't know there was a door here.
[10:42] yumoto
    Okay! It's all clean!
[10:47] yumoto
    Well, I'm going to go take out the trash.
[10:58] yumoto
    Hello!
[10:59] man
    Huh? Who's that?
[11:02] yumoto
    Hello!
[11:05] man
    Who's that guy?
[11:07] man
    That's Hakone Yumoto, the first-year.
[11:09] man
    He seems like a really nice guy.
[11:11] man
    I wonder if we could get him to be our manager.
[11:17] yumoto
    It feels so good getting things clean.
[11:19] yumoto
    Now, then...
[11:21] all
    Hakone Yumoto-kun!
[11:23] man
    Yumoto-kun, would you
    like to become our manager?
[11:27] man
    Hold on! We saw him first!
[11:30] man
    No, we saw him first!
[11:32] man
    No, we did!
[11:34] yumoto
    I'm sorry.
[11:35] yumoto
    I'm grateful for your invitations,
    but I have the Defense Club.
[11:40] yumoto
    Please let me do my best where I am now.
[11:43] all
    So cute!
[11:46] crowd
    Yumoto-kun, join our club!
[11:48] crowd
    Please, Yumoto-kun!
[11:50] crowd
    You're welcome with us!
[11:52] yumoto
    I told you, I can't.
[11:55] man
    He's really popular.
[11:56] man
    Is he really that good a guy?
[11:58] man
    You think we could get him to be our manager?
[12:05] man
    Oh, I didn't mean that we don't need you...
[12:08] man
    Yeah. You do a great job, Megawa.
[12:11] megawa
    I-It's okay. You don't have to defend me.
[12:15] megawa
    It's my own fault for getting complacent,
[12:17] megawa
    thinking I was the only
    popular glasses character around.
[12:25] gero
    His heart appears to be muddied by
    panic, jealousy, and self-loathing.
[12:30] ari
    Yes. I like him.
[12:33] kusa
    Not bad.
[12:35] kusa
    What do you think, Lord Zundar?
[12:40] zun
    Fine, indeed.
[12:41] zun
    He shall be our next target!
[12:44] zun
    Go, Caerula Adamas!
[12:46] both
    Yes, Lord Zundar!
[12:53] megawa
    Yumoto-kun...
[12:54] megawa
    You rocketed to the position of first-year
    student most desired as a manager.
[12:59] megawa
    I envy you...
[13:00] megawa
    No, I loathe you...
[13:02] megawa
    That should be my position!
SIGN    Gero Akoya
    Born April 24th
    Blood Type B / Taurus
    Hobbies: Aromatherapy
    Likes: Beautiful things,
    macarons
[13:20] yumoto
    Senpai!
[13:22] atsu
    Yumoto. Where have you been?
[13:24] yumoto
    A whole lot of sports clubs have
    asked me to be their manager.
[13:27] yumoto
    But my love for the Defense Club hasn't changed.
[13:32] en
    Am I the only one who found
    Yumoto really cute just now?
[13:36] ryuu
    I thought so, too. Damn.
[13:38] atsu
    Well, I've always thought
    he was cute, as a kouhai.
[13:41] io
    Yes, but only as a kouhai.
[13:43] monster
    No!
[13:49] monster
    The position of #1 boy in terms of
    pleasant, cute, and manager material,
[13:53] monster
    or PCM for short, is mine!
[13:58] ryuu
    One of these, huh?
[13:59] atsu
    But were you aware of "PCM"?
[14:01] io
    No. And I don't understand what it means.
[14:04] en
    Yeah. I can't get excited about this.
[14:06] wom
    Don't be like that! Come on, everyone!
[14:09] wom
    Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[14:11] en
    For heaven's sake...
[14:14] en
    Love Making.
[14:19] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[14:22] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[14:24] io
    Love is all!
[14:26] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[14:29] atsu
    Wait, Scarlet's missing!
[14:33] wom
    He's still over there!
[14:35] monster
    Give back my position!
[14:37] monster
    PCM Beam!
[14:40] en
    Look out!
[14:43] ryuu
    What's wrong, Yumoto? Transform already!
[14:46] yumoto
    I can't "transform."
[14:49] en
    No, no, no...
[14:50] atsu
    You've done it plenty of times!
[14:52] io
    You even took the initiative.
[14:53] ryuu
    Yeah.
[14:54] yumoto
    But I'm scared! Senpai, save me!
[14:57] en
    What do we do about this?
[14:59] ryuu
    Crap. For a moment there, I actually
    thought about wanting to protect him!
[15:02] wom
    If it's come to this, we should
    force him to transform!
[15:06] yumoto
    Please don't!
[15:07] yumoto
    I don't want to transform! Senpai!
[15:09] monster
    Why are you ignoring me to flirt with him?!
[15:17] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[15:27] en
    Guys!
[15:32] monster
    That's so mean. Coming at me all at once...
[15:35] monster
    I don't even want to fight!
[15:38] ---
    Huh?
[15:39] io
    He's the one who's overwhelmingly stronger.
[15:42] atsu
    Who the heck is this guy, anyway?
[15:44] monster
    Position-wise, I'm a character
    who should be protected!
[15:49] monster
    I'm not the one who
    should be on the front lines!
[15:51] monster
    And yet... And yet...!
[15:59] ryuu
    He's really strong!
[16:00] io
    His reason for fighting is so absurd
    that I can't predict his next move!
[16:04] atsu
    Normally, Scarlet would say "It's okay!"
    and change the tone of the fight, but...
[16:08] yumoto
    Help me!
[16:10] en
    Yeah, that.
[16:11] monster
    Normally, at a time like this,
    the others would come to save me!
[16:16] monster
    That's my position, and yet...
[16:21] all
    Megawa!
[16:24] megawa
    Senpai...
[16:26] man
    You okay, Megawa?
[16:27] megawa
    Senpai...
[16:28] man
    It's okay now!
[16:29] man
    We'll protect you!
[16:32] megawa
    Senpai...
[16:33] monster
    So why do I have to be the one fighting?!
[16:52] atsu
    He's so powerful...
[16:54] io
    We're going to lose at this rate!
[16:55] ryuu
    Damn.
[16:57] wom
    I'm begging you! Please, transform!
[17:00] yumoto
    I can't. I'm scared.
[17:03] wom
    But if this keeps up, your friends
    will be blown to smithereens!
[17:07] yumoto
    But...
[17:08] wom
    There's no choice. I'll use my ultimate weapon!
[17:11] wom
    If you transform and fight,
    you may cuddle me as much as you want!
[17:16] wom
    Come on! Cuddle me!
    Cuddle me to your heart's content!
[17:20] yumoto
    Stop that! It's indecent!
[17:23] monster
    Now, everyone. If you
    don't want me to beat you,
[17:26] monster
    you should protect me,
    dote on me, be kind to me!
[17:30] monster
    Come on. Come on. Come on!
[17:33] en
    Just because you say "come on"...
[17:35] monster
    If you don't, I'll beat all of you.
[17:37] monster
    It's gonna hurt! You'll be ripped to shreds!
[17:41] ryuu
    Damn.
[17:42] en
    Why...?
[17:45] monster
    If you don't want that,
    then love me and only me!
[17:48] monster
    Come on. Come on. Come on!
[17:57] wom
    This isn't good.
[17:58] wom
    We've never been in a situation this bad!
[18:01] monster
    Come on, dote on me!
[18:04] ryuu
    Damn... This is no joke!
[18:06] io
    We'll never give in!
[18:08] atsu
    That's right. We refuse!
[18:11] en
    Yeah, we refuse.
[18:13] en
    We've already got a cute kouhai to dote on.
[18:17] wom
    He means you!
[18:19] ryuu
    That's right. Our kouhai slot
    has already been filled.
[18:22] io
    He's all we need!
[18:24] atsu
    And we have no plans to be swayed by another!
[18:28] monster
    Then... Then... I'll beat you all!
[18:30] monster
    I really will... I really will beat you all!
[18:36] wom
    This... This is bad!
[18:37] wom
    They're all... They're all going to be beaten!
[18:46] yumoto
    I won't let it...
[18:48] yumoto
    I won't let it happen!
[18:50] yumoto
    Love Making!
[18:55] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[18:56] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[18:58] yumoto
    Take this, Glasses Monster!
[19:07] io
    Took you long enough.
[19:09] atsu
    We've been waiting.
[19:10] en
    Shall we do the usual, then?
[19:13] yumoto
    Sure!
[19:19] yumoto
    Let's go, Glasses Monster!
[19:20] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[19:23] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[19:25] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[19:28] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[19:30] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[19:46] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[19:53] monster
    Is cuteness a sin?!
[20:02] yumoto
    You have a team who needs you, too.
[20:06] yumoto
    Do your best in the place where you belong.
[20:09] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[20:18] monster
    What is this warmth?
[20:21] monster
    I see... So this is love.
[20:30] yumoto
    Love is over!
[20:32] wom
    I'm so happy! You're back to your usual self!
[20:38] en
    Come to think of it, I haven't seen
    Tawarayama with you at all today.
[20:41] en
    Are you sure this is okay?
[20:43] ---
    Gulp!
[20:44] ryuu
    I bet he's completely decomposed.
[20:46] wom
    H-H-He'll be just fine, really.
[20:53] kino
    Did you get that?
[20:54] taz
    Perfect.
[20:57] kino
    Lord Hireashi should be very pleased by this.
[21:02] gora
    Yumoto!
[21:05] goro
    Yumoto!
[21:07] yumoto
    Big bro?
[21:08] gora
    You shouldn't be here. You still have a fever.
[21:11] yumoto
    Sorry I came to school without telling you.
[21:15] gora
    You had me worried.
[21:16] atsu
    Wait, shouldn't our highly
    advanced camouflage prevent him
[21:20] atsu
    from seeing our true identities?
[21:22] en
    Does his brother know who we are?
[21:24] atsu
    No way.
[21:25] ryuu
    Then how'd he know that was his brother?
[21:28] io
    Through the power of brotherly love, I guess?
[21:35] gero
    We lost again...
[21:37] ari
    And there's another strange one among them.
[21:42] kusa
    That man... Exactly who is he?
[21:46] hire
    Well, Kinosaki-chan?
[21:48] hire
    Did you get a good shot?
[21:50] hire
    Did you really?
[21:53] hire
    Wow, we've been stuck in a rut all this time,
[21:56] hire
    but this time it's perfect?
[21:59] hire
    Can I really trust you?
[22:01] hire
    Then once you get some good numbers,
[22:03] hire
    we'll be eating sushi in Ginza,
    if you know what I mean.
[23:40] zun
    At last, our plan is entering the final phase!
[23:44] zun
    Commander Hireashi, leave this to me.
[23:46] zun
    I swear I shall bring results
    that meet your expectations!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    The Trial Called Love
[23:50] zun
    Next time: The Trial Called Love.
[23:52] zun
    Zundar!

Season 1

11 - The Trial Called Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    The Trial Called Love
[01:37] man
    Beniya, we don't have enough.
[01:38] man
    Can we really finish this
    with just three days to go?
[01:41] man
    I'm hungry. Let's send for a shopping run.
SIGN    Binan High School
[01:45] man
    The class or club that wins the
    popularity vote gets a cash prize, right?
[01:49] man
    Oh, that's right. That's what
    the Press Society guys said.
[01:53] man
    Speaking of which, I heard the
    Press Society is broadcasting it.
[01:55] man
    What do you mean, broadcasting?
SIGN    Binan High School Festival Grand Prix
SIGN    Who Will Win?!
[01:57] man
    Like on the internet? Really?
[02:00] kino
    Really!
[02:03] kino
    Please allow our media to cover this!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[02:07] ryuu
    I told you, we should do a "how to date" class.
[02:09] io
    No, we should have an
    investment awareness campaign.
[02:12] en
    I don't really want to participate
    in this school festival stuff.
[02:17] atsu
    I figured you'd say that, En-chan.
[02:19] en
    It's such a pain in the ass, I want to die.
[02:21] io
    What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
[02:24] io
    There's a cash prize on the line.
[02:26] io
    Why wouldn't you pick up
    money just lying on the ground?
[02:29] en
    Bending over is a pain in the ass.
[02:31] ryuu
    He's hardcore lazy.
[02:33] atsu
    But as long as we're being allotted
    a club room and club budget,
[02:36] atsu
    the student council says we have
    to show the fruits of our activities.
[02:39] yumoto
    Here! Here! Here here here!
[02:42] yumoto
    A restaurant! We should do a restaurant!
[02:44] en
    What is that, a kindergartner's dream?
[02:46] io
    No, that's a pretty realistic idea for Yumoto.
[02:50] io
    Do you know the cost of coffee, for example?
[02:54] ryuu
    What, is it easy money?
[02:55] io
    It also depends on our ability
    to draw customers, though.
[02:55] [SONG] sign
    In cold storage
    Don't open!
[02:58] en
    But everyone else is already gonna do
    stuff like cafés and coffee shops.
[03:02] io
    That's true. It would be hard
    without a selling point.
[03:05] ryuu
    We do have a selling point.
[03:06] atsu
    We do?
[03:09] ryuu
    Love Making!
[03:13] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[03:14] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[03:17] ryuu
    That we're transforming heroes!
[03:19] en
    No way.
[03:21] en
    We've worked really hard to
    hide our identities up to now.
[03:24] en
    Revealing them for something like
    this would make that all pointless.
[03:27] ryuu
    Well, that's different.
[03:29] ryuu
    Why don't we just get Wombat
    to work something out
[03:32] ryuu
    with his advanced scientific technology?
[03:34] wom
    Hey! Wait a minute!
[03:36] wom
    It would be unheard of for missionaries
    of love to pursue for-profit ventures!
[03:41] ryuu
    What are you saying?
[03:43] ryuu
    If they eat delicious food,
    they'll feel love and happiness, right?
[03:47] ryuu
    It's a proper love activity. A "lovetivity."
[03:51] wom
    Lovetivity...
[03:52] atsu
    That's Ryuu for you.
[03:54] atsu
    His sweet-talking technique is unsurpassed.
[03:56] en
    Should you really be impressed by that?
[03:57] atsu
    I was just thinking it'd be nice
    to have a refrigerator, though.
[04:01] en
    Why's that?
[04:03] atsu
    Well, we'd always have cold drinks on hand.
[04:06] atsu
    A microwave would be great, too.
[04:08] en
    Are you all really into this restaurant idea?
[04:10] ryuu
    Let's do it!
[04:12] wom
    Lovetivity...
[04:13] atsu
    Coffee, black tea, and cake, maybe?
[04:16] en
    So it's decided that we're doing it, huh?
[04:18] ryuu
    Love out.
[04:21] yumoto
    I think we should serve sushi.
[04:22] io
    Nope.
[04:23] yumoto
    Why?
[04:24] io
    It takes too much work.
[04:26] io
    And we'd be handling raw fish.
[04:29] io
    It would be bad for us if
    any problems were to occur.
[04:31] ryuu
    Yeah. It's dangerous to serve
    stuff that isn't fully cooked.
[04:35] yumoto
    Curry would be good, then.
[04:37] ryuu
    This isn't just your decision, you know.
[04:38] yumoto
    "I would like curry," then.
[04:40] io
    If we do curry, we could make it in
    the club room, then just heat it up.
[04:44] en
    Atsushi makes good curry.
[04:46] atsu
    I have to make it?
[04:48] yumoto
    Kinugawa Curry! Yeah!
[04:50] ryuu
    I can't stand Thai curry, though.
[04:54] en
    Why? Because it's spicy?
[04:56] ryuu
    Actually, it's the coconut milk.
[05:00] ryuu
    I prefer thick home curry!
[05:04] io
    Dry curry is quite good, too.
[05:06] yumoto
    I like everything!
[05:08] wom
    Exactly what kind of food is this "curry"?
[05:14] yumoto
    I don't mind Thai curry, Atsushi-senpai.
[05:18] yumoto
    Pork is my favorite, though.
[05:20] atsu
    I have no idea what you're talking about.
[05:23] yumoto
    Weren't you worrying about
    what kind of curry to make?
[05:27] yumoto
    Because your face looked like this.
[05:30] atsu
    What? When?
[05:32] atsu
    And I don't think I looked like that.
[05:34] yumoto
    Do you actually not like curry?
[05:37] yumoto
    Gratin or napolitan would be fine, too!
[05:40] atsu
    No... I do like curry, but...
[05:44] atsu
    I'm not sure...
[05:45] atsu
    What was it?
[05:47] yumoto
    It gives you heartburn?
[05:48] atsu
    Maybe. Something about it just bothers me.
[05:52] yumoto
    Then you should take a bath and go to sleep.
[05:55] yumoto
    If you just take a bath,
    most things will work themselves out!
[05:58] yumoto
    That's what my big bro says.
[06:00] atsu
    You're right. I guess I'll do that.
SIGN    Binan Festival
SIGN    My Essays
SIGN    Honey Lemon
[06:22] ari
    When you make that expression,
[06:24] ari
    it makes me start to feel melancholy, too.
[06:27] kusa
    What kind of expression is that?
[06:28] ari
    Like you've smelled something foul in the air.
[06:31] gero
    Now that you mention it...
[06:33] gero
    I've been smelling curry for a while now.
[06:36] kusa
    I don't understand people who eat curry.
[06:40] gero
    Doesn't everyone love curry?
[06:42] gero
    Well, I suppose I wouldn't go
    out of my way to eat it, either.
[06:45] ari
    Why?
[06:46] gero
    The dishes look less than
    beautiful after you eat it.
[06:50] kusa
    That's not the problem!
[06:52] kusa
    The powerful stench.
    The stimulation against the tongue.
[06:54] kusa
    It's not something civilized
    humans should be eating.
[06:57] ari
    You're that against it?
[06:59] kusa
    It's a thing we should object
    to on the most basic level.
[07:02] ari
    My, my.
[07:04] ari
    I don't know about such a radical way of thinking.
[07:07] kusa
    As the rightful rulers of this planet,
[07:09] kusa
    we have the duty, the responsibility, and the right.
[07:12] kusa
    By the way, I haven't seen Lord Zundar yet today.
[07:16] gero
    He's been going out a lot lately.
[07:18] ari
    Maybe it's mating season!
SIGN    Press Society
SIGN    Binan High School Festival
    Grand Prix
SIGN    Who Will Win?!
[07:26] hire
    There's no denying you're in a rut.
[07:30] zun
    But I've been dedicated to
    devising clever schemes every week...
[07:33] hire
    That's not good enough!
[07:35] hire
    The masses get bored easily.
[07:38] zun
    I am aware of that.
[07:39] hire
    But anyway, this planet
    called Earth must be jinxed.
[07:44] hire
    I mean, we've conquered a lot of planets, right?
[07:48] hire
    Some of them have given
    us some trouble, of course.
[07:50] hire
    But we've conquered the
    vast majority of them, right?
[07:54] hire
    And yet the Earth alone...
[07:56] hire
    Why is this the only place
    where we've been canceled?
[08:02] zun
    Canceled? What was the reason?
[08:05] hire
    Because it didn't go well.
    An obstacle got in the way.
[08:08] zun
    Obstacle?
[08:09] zun
    Still, I don't think the beings of this
    planet possess any special abilities.
[08:14] hire
    No, they do.
[08:17] hire
    Stupid power.
[08:19] zun
    They seem to call it "love," or some such...
[08:22] hire
    It ain't love, stupid!
[08:24] hire
    It's stupid power.
[08:26] zun
    So what kind of soldiers do we need
    to oppose this "stupid love power"?
[08:31] hire
    Good question. We might need
    an even more negative person.
[08:36] zun
    Negative?
[08:37] hire
    Yeah. Someone soggy, viscous,
    and goopy who will really stick with it.
[08:43] hire
    A human steeped in grudge and discontent.
[08:50] yumoto
    Big bro, what's wrong?
[08:52] yumoto
    You don't have your usual edge.
[08:54] goro
    I-It's nothing.
[08:57] gora
    Hey, there's something I want to ask you.
[09:00] gora
    The other day, when you...
[09:02] yumoto
    You mean the "first cold in my life" incident?
[09:06] gora
    Yeah, that's right.
[09:08] yumoto
    I don't remember it very well.
[09:11] yumoto
    I was carrying a cleaning rag.
[09:13] gora
    A cleaning rag?
[09:14] yumoto
    Yeah. And for some reason, I had glasses.
[09:16] gora
    Glasses?
[09:17] yumoto
    And a baseball.
[09:19] gora
    Really?
[09:20] yumoto
    I think. Sorry if I'm wrong.
[09:23] yumoto
    So what was it you wanted to ask me?
[09:26] gora
    Well, Yumoto...
[09:28] gora
    What do you think of transformation...
[09:31] gora
    Deviation and such?
[09:33] yumoto
    Deviation?
[09:34] yumoto
    Has he discovered some weird hobby?
[09:37] yumoto
    Well, I think it's fine!
[09:40] yumoto
    People are free to do as they like.
[09:43] yumoto
    As long as they aren't bothering
    others, I'd encourage them.
[09:46] gora
    I see.
[09:49] yumoto
    Did he want me to stop him?
[09:59] yumoto
    Let's eat!
[10:01] all
    Eat!
[10:07] yumoto
    It's good!
[10:10] yumoto
    Curry's so good! Good curry!
[10:13] ryuu
    Shut up and eat.
[10:14] yumoto
    But don't you think the Kinugawa Curry is good?
[10:17] ryuu
    It's not about that. It's because you're annoying.
[10:19] en
    I'm more fascinated
[10:22] en
    by the surrealism of Wombat eating curry.
[10:26] wom
    Human know-how produces
    such a condensed taste!
[10:29] io
    300 yen for a plate of curry.
[10:31] io
    And if we factor in the cash prize...
[10:34] ryuu
    Wow, you seem confident we'll win.
[10:36] io
    Of course I am.
[10:38] yumoto
    Can we start now, then?
[10:40] wom
    Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[10:45] yumoto
    Love Making!
[11:12] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[11:13] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[11:16] en
    Love Making!
[11:26] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[11:28] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[11:31] atsu
    Love Making!
[11:41] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[11:42] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[11:45] io
    Love Making!
[11:55] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[11:57] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[12:00] ryuu
    Love Making!
[12:10] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[12:11] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[12:14] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[12:17] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[12:20] io
    Love is all!
[12:22] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[12:25] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[12:27] five
    Battle Lovers!
[12:29] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[12:32] five
    Of love!
[12:35] en
    You really don't think they'll realize
[12:37] en
    that we're the same people as those guys?
[12:41] io
    The blur isn't on us, right?
[12:43] atsu
    Will that be okay?
[12:45] wom
    It's fine. My highly advanced scientific
    technology has mumble mumble...
[12:49] en
    What do you mean, "mumble mumble"?
[12:51] yumoto
    Now, let's go get customers!
SIGN    Zundar
    Born August 18th
    (converted to Earth calendar)
    Blood Type B / Leo
    Hobbies: Secret
    Likes: Escargot
[13:00] yumoto
    Deliciousness that shakes the Earth!
[13:02] yumoto
    Even an alien would be shocked!
[13:04] guy
    Why are you dressed like that, Hakone?
[13:05] yumoto
    We're transforming heroes!
[13:07] yumoto
    You know, we've seen them around
    the school a lot lately, right?
[13:10] yumoto
    That weird group of five.
[13:11] yumoto
    We're cosplaying as them!
[13:13] io
    It's not a lie, I guess.
[13:15] en
    And yet, it's a perfect cover story.
[13:17] ryuu
    Yumoto's amazing.
[13:19] yumoto
    Cosplay Hero Curry! Now on sale!
[13:22] guy
    Cosplays, heroes, and curry?
    Isn't that a bit too much at once?
[13:26] yumoto
    Put on more! More and more and more!
[13:29] en
    We don't have a choice.
    I guess we'd better work, too.
[13:32] en
    I don't want to have any leftovers.
[13:33] ryuu
    Sure.
[13:34] io
    Let's go.
[13:35] en
    Atsushi, you handle the curry stock.
[13:37] atsu
    Roger.
[13:38] wom
    Give me something to do, too!
[13:41] en
    Wombat, you and Mr. Tawarayama watch the store.
[13:45] wom
    I accept!
[13:48] tawara
    Defense curry.
[13:51] tawara
    It's good.
[13:53] en
    Okay.
[13:54] en
    A little more enthusiasm.
[13:56] wom
    Why do I have to suffer such poor treatment?
[13:59] en
    Mr. Tawarayama can't help
    unless both his hands are free.
SIGN    Defense Club Curry 300 yen
[14:02] wom
    Even so...
[14:04] en
    Well, you can't go away from him.
[14:06] wom
    But...
[14:07] ryuu
    Sir, you're not doing any work.
[14:15] atsu
    It's still got an edge to it.
[14:18] atsu
    Oops.
[14:20] kusa
    Foolish humans who lack ambition
    or aspiration have no right to exist.
[14:25] kusa
    They are worthless.
[14:28] kusa
    I will purge ugly things, foolish things,
    and worthless things from the world.
[14:34] kusa
    The world should be orderly, beautiful, and regular.
[14:40] kusa
    And yet, what is this curry stench?
[14:43] kusa
    Why is it drifting in from over here?
[14:54] atsu
    Um...
[14:56] atsu
    Want some?
[14:57] kusa
    Who would stoop to eating something so humble?!
[15:06] atsu
    Kin-chan?
[15:07] kusa
    Do not call me by that name.
[15:09] atsu
    Kin-chan, you're our enemy? That can't be true.
[15:17] kusa
    Truly base and vulgar.
[15:19] kusa
    Its wicked stimulation poisons the sense
    of taste and destroys the sense of smell.
[15:23] kusa
    Worse, its offensive appearance
    mocks the sense of sight.
[15:27] kusa
    I cannot fathom a person like you
    who can this thing known as curry,
[15:31] kusa
    Kinugawa Atsushi.
[15:35] atsu
    No. My name is...
[15:37] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[15:40] kusa
    I see. So our battle was fated, then!
[15:45] zun
    Go, Aurite!
[15:47] zun
    The time has come to unleash your power
[15:48] zun
    and achieve your longstanding desire!
[15:52] kusa
    Conquest!
[15:59] kusa
    My name is Dark Aurite.
[16:02] kusa
    The Black Chevalier, writhing in darkness!
[16:06] kusa
    Ater Aurum!
[16:13] gero
    What's that?
[16:14] ari
    That's where the student council room is.
[16:16] en
    What's that?
[16:17] ari
    That's where our club room is.
[16:26] atsu
    Wait! Let's do this after the culture festival's over!
[16:28] atsu
    I want to sell the curry I worked so hard to make!
[16:30] kusa
    Curry, you say?
[16:32] kusa
    Just leave it to rot!
[16:35] atsu
    No! That curry's important to me!
[16:37] kusa
    Why? Why curry, of all things?
[16:40] atsu
    If we're talking about "of all things,"
[16:41] atsu
    why do you have to be my
    enemy of all things, Kin-chan?
[16:46] kusa
    Don't call me by that name!
[16:50] guy
    Wow! Who's putting on that performance?
[16:52] guy
    Cool! There's lights and everything!
[16:55] ari
    What's going on?
[16:57] gero
    It must be serious, to make
    the president forget himself.
[17:00] en
    Why is Atsushi fighting?
[17:03] both
    President?
[17:04] both
    Atsushi?
[17:07] gero
    Why can we see their faces?
[17:09] ryuu
    The blur isn't on us, right?
[17:13] taw
    Mumble mumble, and all.
[17:15] all
    You guys are...
[17:16] both
    Caerula Adamas?
[17:19] both
    The Battle Lovers?
[17:20] all
    Um...
[17:22] both
    Conquest!
[17:25] ari
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[17:28] ari
    Argent!
[17:33] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[17:35] gero
    Perlite!
[17:40] gora
    A bad omen.
[17:42] gero
    How dare you deceive us all this time?!
[17:45] ryuu
    That's our line!
[17:48] ari
    Learning your identities is
    a real load off our minds!
[17:52] en
    It's hard to see something that's
    right under your nose, I guess!
[17:58] io
    What's going to happen to the curry?
[18:00] io
    What about the profits from Cosplay Hero Curry?
[18:03] wom
    Mumble mumble, I'd say!
[18:07] kusa
    Gigant Aurum!
[18:14] atsu
    Yumo—
[18:14] yumoto
    Why are you two fighting?!
[18:18] kusa
    This is not such a trivial thing!
[18:20] yumoto
    But it is a fight, isn't it?
[18:22] atsu
    He just hates me, that's all.
[18:25] kusa
    That's right.
[18:26] kusa
    I hate you, Kinugawa Atsushi.
[18:29] kusa
    Ever since that day you rejected me!
[18:33] yumoto
    Rejected? What did you do, Atsushi-senpai?
[18:36] atsu
    Rejected? Did I do that to you, Kin-chan?
[18:40] kusa
    If you're playing dumb, it's pathetic.
[18:42] kusa
    If you really have forgotten,
    then I'll consign you to death!
[18:47] kusa
    At-chan, you're coming by my house, right?
[18:49] atsu
    I can't today. I've got something to do.
[18:52] kusa
    Okay...
[18:58] en
    Whoops.
[18:59] atsu
    Th-Thanks.
[19:01] en
    Kinugawa? Where are you going?
[19:03] atsu
    CoCoKaRa Curry.
[19:04] en
    That's right. Today's their extra-spicy curry day.
[19:07] atsu
    Yufuin, you like curry?
[19:08] en
    Pretty well.
[19:09] atsu
    Want to go with me?
[19:12] atsu
    I have a coupon.
SIGN    All curry 20% off
[19:14] en
    So do I.
[19:15] en
    If I had to choose which I hate more,
    mild curry or stinky natto,
[19:18] en
    I'd choose mild curry any time.
[19:20] atsu
    That's right. There are people
    who find even the mild stuff spicy.
[19:24] kusa
    Stupid curry.
[19:29] atsu
    Morning, Kin-chan.
[19:36] atsu
    Kin-chan?
[19:40] en
    What, did you have a fight or something?
[19:42] atsu
    I don't remember having one...
[19:44] en
    What, you're fighting and
    you don't even know why?
[19:49] en
    Why not ask him?
[19:50] atsu
    I'd better not.
[19:51] atsu
    If he doesn't want to talk about it,
    I'd feel bad trying to force it out of him.
[19:56] kusa
    You broke our oath!
[19:59] atsu
    Oath?
[20:04] atsu
    What did you wish for?
[20:06] kusa
    I wished for us to stay friends forever.
[20:10] atsu
    You don't need to wish on a shooting star for that.
[20:15] atsu
    'Cause we'll be friends forever, no matter what.
[20:22] kusa
    You stomped on decorum!
[20:28] gora
    Yumoto...
[20:31] gora
    I'm coming now.
[20:38] kusa
    Don't get in my way!
[20:39] yumoto
    Please don't have a falling-out in front of me!
[20:42] yumoto
    I hate that kind of thing!
[20:44] kusa
    In that case...
[20:48] kusa
    I'll destroy you both together!
[20:53] gora
    Do they intend to do the same thing again?
[21:03] io
    Fight!
[21:05] ryuu
    One shot?
[21:06] yumoto
    Hey, you're late!
[21:10] atsu
    En-chan!
[21:11] en
    Sorry I'm late.
[21:18] en
    When I hear that story of yours, Kusatsu,
    it sounds to me like you're just sulking!
[21:22] kusa
    Shut up, you coward!
[21:24] io
    We won't stand silent while you
    slander the good name of curry!
[21:43] gero
    It's presumptuous to think that
    the likes of you could oppose us.
[21:46] ari
    If you withdraw now, we won't harm you.
[21:51] yumoto
    I am going to stop this stupid fight between you!
[21:54] hire
    Oh? It's being drawn out that long?
[21:57] hire
    That's great. Just what I wanted.
[23:39] [SONG] ---
    Next Time
[23:43] [SONG] ---
    At Last
[23:47] [SONG] ---
    The Final Episode!

Season 1

12 - Love Forever

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:10] yumoto
    I'm going to stop this
    stupid fight between you!
[00:12] hire
    Oh? It's being drawn out that long?
[00:15] hire
    That's great. Just what I wanted.
[00:25] yumoto
    Student Council President!
    Let's talk about this!
[00:28] kusa
    Don't be absurd!
[00:30] kusa
    I have power!
[00:32] kusa
    Power that you lack.
    Power to cleanse the world!
[00:41] gora
    Don't be deceived!
[00:45] gora
    This has all been prearranged!
[00:47] gora
    It's a set-up!
[00:49] yumoto
    Big bro Gora?
[00:50] atsu
    What was set up?
[00:52] gora
    All of it! This guy set up all of it!
[00:55] hire
    Let me go! Let me go, I say!
[00:57] hire
    Just who do you think I am?
[01:00] kusa
    A talking goldfish? It couldn't be...
[01:02] gora
    Now, Hireashi! Confess everything!
[01:07] hire
    I'll talk! I'll talk!
[01:08] hire
    I'll tell them everything. Just don't crush me!
[01:12] gora
    Now, hurry!
[01:13] hire
    Yes, yes, yes!
[01:14] hire
    This is a reality show targeted
    at the whole universe!
[01:18] hire
    The things you say, the things you do,
    every move you make...
[01:22] hire
    All of it, down to the tiniest detail,
    is being broadcast across the universe!
[01:26] all
    Broadcast across the universe?!
[01:28] hire
    They're watching you Earthlings divided
    into two groups and fighting each other!
[01:33] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[01:35] en
    I never thought I'd have a moment in
    my life when I'd say "What did you say?!"
[01:40] en
    But this is a real
    "What did you say?!" moment.
[01:42] kusa
    Broadcast... across the universe?
[01:44] zun
    Chief Hireashi!
[01:50] yumoto
    Big bro!
[01:52] zun
    Chief Hireashi! Are you all right?
[01:53] hire
    Of course I'm not all right!
    You took too long getting here!
[01:56] zun
    I am very sorry!
[01:58] hire
    Kinosaki-chan! Continue the broadcast!
[02:01] kino
    Okay! This is Kinosaki on the scene!
[02:04] kino
    Now let's have a talk with the leader
    of the Conquest Club, Kusatsu Kinshiro!
[02:09] kino
    How are you feeling right now?
[02:12] kino
    Say a few words to our viewers.
[02:17] kino
    Okay! That was Dark Aurite,
    A.K.A. Kusatsu Kinshiro,
[02:20] kino
    whose expression suggests
    some lingering shock!
[02:24] kusa
    That means...
[02:26] kusa
    Everything I've said and done
[02:28] kusa
    has all been watched?
[02:30] kino
    Yes, that's right!
[02:32] kino
    In addition to your battles,
    there have been hidden cameras set up
[02:36] kino
    in your student council room
    and personal spaces, as well!
[02:39] kino
    It's all being broadcast
    throughout the whole galaxy!
[02:43] kusa
    Throughout the whole galaxy?
[02:45] kino
    Yes! The faint yearning
    for your childhood friend,
[02:48] kino
    the obstinacy, the angry outbursts,
    the unavoidable failures of understanding...
[02:52] kino
    You're a stand-out character!
[02:54] kino
    You're a conversation topic for thousands
    of millions of people across the universe!
[03:00] kusa
    I-It can't be...
[03:01] kino
    It's the tsundere in you.
[03:04] yumoto
    Big bro! Big bro!
[03:05] yumoto
    Speak to me! Don't die!
[03:08] zun
    What are you doing, Caerula Adamas?
[03:10] zun
    Go and defeat the Battle Lovers!
[03:13] kusa
    What's the point in fighting them now?
[03:16] zun
    What was that?
[03:18] kusa
    Now that everything's been brought to light,
[03:22] kusa
    all my talk of order rings completely hollow.
[03:25] zun
    To whom do you think I gave
[03:28] zun
    the power to rule the world?
[03:32] zun
    Tch.
[03:34] hire
    If it's come to this, go to plan B!
[03:36] hire
    Do it, Zun-chan!
[03:37] zun
    Sir!
[03:38] zun
    Zundar Needles, activate!
[03:44] yumoto
    Big bro?
[03:45] atsu
    This is...
[03:52] en
    G-Gora-san!
[04:06] yumoto
    B-Big bro Gora!
[04:08] gora
    My name is Wood-Chopper Monster.
[04:11] gora
    I will chop wood, and the world, in two!
[04:15] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[04:16] en
    Okay, that's already the second
    "What did you say?" of my life.
[04:21] ari
    He became a monster?
[04:23] gero
    So it wasn't our power doing that?
[04:30] yumoto
    Why... Why is my brother Gora...
[04:35] gora
    Chop!
[04:40] yumoto
    Stop it, big bro!
[04:46] io
    He's so powerful...
[04:47] ryuu
    That's Yumoto's big brother for you.
[04:49] atsu
    All that daily wood chopping
    wasn't just for show.
[04:52] en
    And what's with the hatchet?
    That's a bit obsessive.
[04:55] yumoto
    Why are you so good at this, big bro?
[04:58] hire
    He actually noticed! Well done! Well done!
[05:00] yumoto
    Huh? What?
[05:02] hire
    Now it's time for a nostalgic playback of old times!
SIGN    TV Universe
[05:09] hire
    Universal Calendar 12015.
[05:12] hire
    My employer, TV Universe,
    sent me, the skilled Hireashi,
SIGN    Reality Show
SIGN    Can I Destroy the Earth?
[05:18] hire
    to be the director of a reality show:
    Can I Destroy the Earth?
[05:25] hire
    There was a despicable, wicked Earthling.
[05:27] hire
    His name was Hakone Gora.
[05:31] gora
    Chop!
[05:33] gora
    Chop!
[05:34] gora
    Chop!
[05:43] hire
    That man vanquished all the monsters
    we sent, one after another.
[05:48] hire
    He had no consideration for how badly our viewers
[05:51] hire
    wanted to see the Earth conquered and destroyed,
[05:53] hire
    and no ability to read the mood.
    He made all our plans come to nothing.
[05:57] atsu
    Are you saying Yumoto's big brother was
    the previous generation of Battle Lovers?
[06:02] yumoto
    Oh, now that you mention it...
[06:04] yumoto
    My brother would always sharpen
    his hatchet after I went to bed...
[06:08] yumoto
    I saw him go out somewhere
    after that, lots of times.
[06:12] yumoto
    I was too scared to ask
    where he was going, though.
[06:15] io
    That would be pretty scary.
[06:17] ryuu
    Yeah, on a pants-pissing level.
[06:20] hire
    Once the program lost its
    concept, the ratings dwindled.
[06:24] hire
    In the end, it was tragically canceled.
[06:26] hire
    CIDE is the only show I've ever
    directed that got canceled!
[06:30] atsu
    CIDE?
[06:32] en
    I guess that's short for Can I Destroy the Earth?
[06:34] wom
    It's only natural that it was canceled!
[06:36] wom
    I could not allow such
    foolishness and barbarism!
[06:40] wom
    You received numerous complaints from
    the Space Ethics Improvement Organization,
[06:43] wom
    but you always make some vague
    excuse like "just watch it until the end"!
[06:47] en
    Wait, you've known about all this from the start?
[06:51] wom
    I'm just acting in the
    spirit of animal preservation!
[06:54] wom
    I couldn't stand watching the creatures of
    Earth wiped out for someone's entertainment!
[06:59] zun
    We're just giving the masses what they want to see!
[07:03] wom
    What kind of viral marketing is that?
[07:05] wom
    Your selfishness is your undoing!
[07:07] wom
    What about compliance, anyway?
[07:10] hire
    Compliance? Ha! I'm laughing so hard,
    I could brew tea in my navel!
[07:14] wom
    I don't want to hear
    talk of navels from a fish!
[07:16] zun
    Silence! You have a pouch, and that's just gross!
[07:19] wom
    Are you going there?
    Are you really going to go there?
[07:22] zun
    And what if I am?
[07:24] wom
    Then I'll go there, too!
[07:26] wom
    The way you're always twitching your nose?
[07:29] wom
    That really bothers me!
[07:31] zun
    I'm not twitching it!
[07:33] wom
    You are so!
[07:35] hire
    You really are.
[07:36] ---
    What?!
[07:37] en
    Cut it out, you guys.
[07:39] en
    I can't tell if it's cute or disgusting.
[07:42] hire
    Anyway, since CIDE was a failure,
[07:46] hire
    I was exiled to the company
    history compilation office.
[07:49] hire
    Even Aria-chan, the cabaret girl
    from Gotanda Planet, dumped me!
[07:52] hire
    It put me through the wringer!
[07:55] ryuu
    You go to cabaret clubs? Also, those exist?
[08:00] hire
    Oh, really? The numbers are through the roof?
[08:03] hire
    Okay, go at it! Make it look good!
[08:06] gora
    Chop!
[08:12] atsu
    Why did Gora-san...
[08:14] io
    He was standing there quietly all this time.
[08:16] ryuu
    Why did he decide to start moving again now?
[08:18] hire
    That's the kabuki rule!
[08:20] hire
    When the camera's rolling,
    everyone else stops moving.
[08:23] hire
    Until the speaker's done with
    their lines, they must stand quietly.
[08:26] hire
    More precisely, they're incapable of moving!
[08:28] gora
    Chop!
[08:29] gora
    Chop! Chop! Chop!
[08:33] hire
    Excellent!
[08:34] hire
    A former hero, fallen to the dark side.
    He becomes the ultimate enemy,
[08:38] hire
    and now stands in the way of his
    own flesh-and-blood little brother!
[08:41] yumoto
    Big bro, if you were really a hero once,
[08:44] yumoto
    how can you turn into a monster so easily?!
[08:46] yumoto
    Show some mettle, big bro!
[08:56] gora
    I refuse.
[09:03] yumoto
    Stop it, big bro!
[09:04] gora
    Chop!
[09:08] yumoto
    Stop it, I said!
[09:09] kino
    Oh, what a red-hot development!
[09:11] kino
    Whoever wins, we're guaranteed rave reviews!
[09:14] ryuu
    I'm not really excited about
    attacking Yumoto's brother, but...
[09:18] io
    This is no time for holding back!
[09:21] ryuu
    Vesta Ignit!
[09:23] io
    Sulfur Gaia!
[09:26] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[09:27] en
    Cerulean Aqua!
[09:29] gora
    Chop!
[09:31] en
    It's no use! We're no match for him!
[09:33] yumoto
    Big bro! Come to your senses!
[09:35] gora
    I refuse!
[09:45] kino
    Look at that power!
[09:47] kino
    This is the Gora Power that
    drove CIDE to cancellation!
[09:50] ari
    Excuse me.
[09:51] ari
    It's Kinosaki-kun, isn't it?
[09:53] kino
    Yes, that's right.
[09:55] ari
    Are you through interviewing
    our student council president?
[09:58] kino
    Yes, I'm done.
[10:00] kino
    What's going on here is far more interesting.
[10:03] kino
    Woah!
[10:03] ari
    Got it.
[10:04] ari
    Then I have one more question for you.
[10:06] kino
    I'm busy right now. Can't it wait until later?
[10:09] ari
    No, it's a very simple question.
[10:11] ari
    Answer yes or no.
[10:13] ari
    Did you know about their plan from the start?
[10:17] ari
    And that's why you've
    been doing your research?
[10:19] kino
    That's right.
[10:21] ari
    I see.
[10:22] kino
    What is it?
[10:27] ari
    Akoya...
[10:28] gero
    It's the duty of the youngest member
    to handle this kind of work, right?
[10:41] en
    Yumoto!
[10:42] gora
    Chop!
[10:44] gora
    Chop!
[10:49] gora
    Chop!
[10:58] atsu
    Kin-chan!
[11:08] kusa
    What?
[11:10] atsu
    Are you okay, Kin-chan?
[11:15] kusa
    Why?
[11:16] atsu
    Because even though you
    might not feel the same way,
[11:19] atsu
    I still think of you as a friend.
[11:24] kusa
    At-chan...
[11:37] kusa
    "Cleanse" can also mean to
    make anew, to set things right.
[11:42] kusa
    In that case, perhaps I need to cleanse myself.
[11:47] gora
    Chop!
[11:48] gora
    Chop chop chop chop chop!
[11:54] gora
    Chop!
[11:59] gora
    Chop!
[12:05] yumoto
    Guys!
[12:06] en
    Now! Use the Love Attack!
[12:09] all
    Yeah!
[12:10] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[12:12] Default;en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[12:15] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[12:17] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[12:20] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[12:35] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[12:41] gora
    Chop!
[12:44] yumoto
    The Love Attack...
[12:45] gora
    Chop!
[12:47] yumoto
    You won't chop us!
[12:52] gora
    Chop!
[12:54] yumoto
    Big bro, snap out of it!
[12:57] gora
    Chop!
[12:58] yumoto
    This isn't my big brother!
[13:01] gora
    Ch... Chop...
[13:03] yumoto
    If you become a minion of evil,
    who will chop the wood for the bath?
[13:07] gora
    Bath?
[13:09] yumoto
    That's right! The Kurotama Bath
    is everything to you, isn't it?
[13:13] gora
    Kurotama Bath...
[13:15] yumoto
    Remember the warmth of the bath!
[13:18] gora
    Warmth...?
[13:37] en
    Yumoto grew...
[13:38] atsu
    ...wings?
[13:39] ryuu
    He's an angel?
[13:40] io
    No way.
[13:42] wom
    That's the More Better Love Making!
[13:44] all
    More Better Love Making?!
[13:46] wom
    That's right!
[13:48] wom
    He's more better in every respect!
[13:49] wom
    In other words, he's the More Sparkling Prince!
[13:53] yumoto
    More Better Love Shower!
[14:02] gora
    What is this sensation?
[14:04] gora
    It seems to warm me to my core...
[14:07] gora
    Comfort... Healing...
[14:09] yumoto
    Big bro, this is a bath.
[14:12] gora
    I see. This is a bath.
[14:19] gora
    Baths are great.
[14:22] yumoto
    Love is over!
[14:24] hire
    It's not over yet!
[14:29] en
    Oh, fine! I'll say it as many times as you want!
[14:32] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[14:35] hire
    How dare you, how dare you,
    how dare you, how dare you?!
[14:38] hire
    You've rendered all my plans to nothing!
[14:42] yumoto
    That's...
[14:44] yumoto
    a porcupinefish?
[14:45] wom
    A goldfish and a hedgehog
    make a porcupinefish.
[14:47] wom
    It does make sense, logically...
[14:49] all
    No it doesn't!
[14:50] hire
    Go! Finish them!
[14:53] zun
    Roger that!
[14:55] zun
    Transform!
[15:04] hire
    Porcupine...
[15:06] zun
    fish!
[15:08] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[15:21] yumoto
    I don't think so!
[15:30] kusa
    Ultima...
[15:31] trio
    Adamas!
[15:38] ryuu
    Why would the student council...
    I mean, Caerula Adamas help us?
[15:41] kusa
    As student council president,
    I couldn't turn a blind eye
[15:45] kusa
    to anyone causing harm to our students. That's all.
[15:48] atsu
    Thanks, Kin-chan.
[15:51] kusa
    Why?! Why are you like this, At-chan?
[15:55] kusa
    You being so nice just lets me be selfish!
[15:59] kusa
    It was the same then!
[16:00] kusa
    You should have gotten angry and
    told me not to take things out on you!
[16:03] kusa
    But because it was me, you didn't say anything.
[16:07] kusa
    You didn't do anything!
[16:08] kusa
    That's why I could never apologize to you!
[16:12] atsu
    Sorry.
[16:13] kusa
    I don't want an apology!
[16:16] atsu
    Sorry.
[16:20] ryuu
    Kinugawa-senpai, at times like this,
[16:22] ryuu
    you should just say "I understand"
    and take them gently in your arms.
[16:25] io
    That's just how you do things.
[16:27] atsu
    Does this mean we can walk
    home together and talk again?
[16:33] kusa
    Yeah.
[16:35] wom
    Oh, this is the true love known as friendship!
[16:39] wom
    It's a happy end!
[16:40] hire
    I told you, it hasn't ended yet!
[16:44] hire
    I almost got stuck following the kabuki rule!
[16:48] yumoto
    You still want to fight?!
[16:50] wom
    In that case, everyone turn More Better!
[16:54] en
    The More Flashing Prince!
[16:58] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[17:00] atsu
    The More Piercing Prince!
[17:02] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[17:05] io
    The More Roaring Prince!
[17:08] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:10] ryuu
    The More Thrilling Prince!
[17:13] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[17:15] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier,
    shining in greater radiance!
[17:19] kusa
    Aurite!
[17:21] ari
    The Silver Chevalier,
    rustling even more young leaves!
[17:23] ari
    Argent!
[17:25] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier,
    making all the flowers bloom!
[17:28] gero
    Perlite!
[17:30] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:32] five
    More Battle Lovers!
[17:35] hire
    "More Better"? Don't make me laugh!
[17:37] hire
    You're worse than before!
[17:40] en
    It's true that it's a strange name...
[17:41] wom
    The name is just ornamental!
[17:43] wom
    Why can't they understand that?
[17:45] yumoto
    That's right! What really matters is love!
[17:48] en
    Freedom!
[17:49] atsu
    Friendship!
[17:50] io
    Money!
[17:51] ryuu
    Girls!
[17:52] gero
    Beauty, right?
[17:54] ari
    I'm not sure.
[17:55] kusa
    For Binan High School to
    remain Binan High School!
[17:59] yumoto
    Let's go!
[18:01] hire
    Let's turn the tables on them!
[18:02] zun
    Roger that!
[18:18] hire
    All of you together isn't enough!
[18:21] hire
    Yes, yes? S-Station director?
[18:24] hire
    Huh? What? Of course not.
[18:26] hire
    The development may be a bit forced,
    but we got the proper go-ahead for it.
[18:30] hire
    What? R-Right now?
    You can't cancel us that suddenly!
[18:34] hire
    Director! Um, D-Director?
[18:37] hire
    What about that night on Gotanda Planet?!
[18:42] hire
    Damn it! In that case,
    I'll crush you all together!
[18:46] hire
    Fire! Fire! Keep firing!
[18:48] zun
    But I'm afraid we've fired all our ammo, sir.
[18:53] hire
    Ergh!
[18:55] yumoto
    I'll tell you why you were canceled!
[18:59] hire
    What?
[19:00] yumoto
    Because you have no love
    for your subject matter!
[19:03] yumoto
    Those who have no love
    cannot move the hearts of others!
[19:08] yumoto
    More Better Love...
[19:12] yumoto
    Attack!
[19:23] yumoto
    Love is... seriously... over!
[19:30] wom
    And so, Can I Destroy the
    Earth? Returns was canceled.
[19:35] hire
    I swear to only produce high
    quality programming from now on!
[19:40] zun
    Ditto.
[19:54] wom
    The culture festival proceeded without incident,
[19:57] wom
    and their Cosplay Hero Curry sold out.
SIGN    Sold Out
[20:07] yumoto
    Big bro, I'm getting in first, okay?
[20:11] gora
    Yes. Today's bath is in good condition.
[20:14] yumoto
    Yeah!
[20:16] yumoto
    Yo!
[20:18] all
    Yo!
[20:20] en
    Yumoto.
[20:22] en
    Did you know that nikujaga and stew
    are brothers from different mothers?
[20:27] kusa
    Naturally, stew is superior.
[20:30] atsu
    We're not talking about superior or inferior.
[20:32] gero
    But nikujaga's rather homely, isn't it?
[20:35] io
    No, the broad-mindedness of nikujaga,
[20:38] io
    that you can make it with beef
    or pork, is a thing to be admired.
[20:41] ari
    Either way,
[20:42] ari
    it's still sad when you get the wrong
    type of potatoes and they melt.
[20:46] ryuu
    Even if it gets mushy, I forgive them
    if they say "sorry" in a cute way.
[20:52] ---
    Huh?
[20:53] en
    The point is, when you use
    the "mother" known as soy sauce
[20:55] en
    instead of demi-glace sauce,
    you give birth to nikujaga.
[20:58] yumoto
    Oh!
[20:59] yumoto
    Nikujaga, huh?
[21:01] yumoto
    I wish I could have fed some to Wom-san.
[21:06] atsu
    That's true.
[21:08] wom
    Excuse me... Don't treat me
    like I'm dead just yet.
[21:12] en
    Oh, sorry.
[21:14] en
    But at this point in the story, you would
    usually have gone back to your home planet.
[21:17] wom
    I can't go back to space until
    Mr. Tawarayama is revived.
[21:21] atsu
    Huh? What about your scientifically
    advanced medical mechanisms?
[21:24] kusa
    That's likely just an excuse.
[21:27] ---
    Gulp...
[21:28] yumoto
    Well, that just means I can cuddle you more!
[21:30] wom
    W-Wait! No, no, no.
[21:32] yumoto
    There, there, there.
[21:32] wom
    Well, I wouldn't say...
[21:34] yumoto
    Cuddle, cuddle.
[21:36] wom
    ...that!
SIGN    Important news after the break
SIGN    <Important News> After this, Mr. Tawarayama was brought back to life thanks to the "life" brought to Earth by one of Wombat's people. Thank goodness.

Season 2

Season 2

1 - Love, Once More!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] gero
    --
[00:00] tsu
    --
[00:00] yu
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:14] en
    Atsushi... you know...
[00:16] en
    There's something I've been
    thinking about lately.
[00:19] at
    What is it, En-chan?
[00:20] at
    The Ol*mpics?
[00:21] at
    The constitution?
[00:22] at
    Chikuwabu?
[00:23] en
    No, time.
[00:25] at
    Time?
[00:26] en
    We only just got promoted to 3rd years,
[00:29] en
    and it was autumn before we knew it.
[00:31] en
    We missed all our chances for summer fun.
[00:34] en
    You know?
[00:35] io
    Not true, Yufuin-senpai.
[00:38] io
    We went to both
[00:39] io
    Danran Beach and Mt. Binan.
[00:42] ryu
    Is your memory getting fuzzy already?
    That's an aging danger sign!
[00:46] ats
    En-chan, your kouhai are worried about you.
[00:49] en
    Yeah,
[00:50] en
    but it didn't feel like we were going
    to the mountains or the beach for fun.
[00:53] en
    It's too late now,
[00:55] en
    but it's always been my dream to
    make lots of fun summer memories.
[00:59] io
    You know the saying.
[01:01] io
    "Time doesn't betray dreams," and vice versa.
[01:04] en
    Does anyone even know what that means?
[01:06] at
    In my opinion, it means that
    the time you spend working
[01:09] at
    puts you that much closer to your dreams...
[01:11] en
    Atsushi. You don't actually
    have to analyze it.
[01:14] ryu
    Hey, you know sand clocks?
[01:17] at
    That's pretty out of the blue.
[01:18] ryu
    Well, talking about clocks
    in the bath reminded me.
[01:21] ryu
    Sand clocks.
[01:22] io
    Saunas have them a lot, don't they?
[01:24] en
    Io, have you been to a sauna?
[01:27] io
    A friend of mine has one at home.
[01:29] io
    A Finnish sauna.
[01:30] io
    It's basically a steam bath.
[01:32] en
    They slap their backs with
    birch branches, don't they?
[01:36] io
    What? Do they?
[01:37] en
    You didn't know?
[01:38] at
    Anyway, Ryuu, what were
    you saying about sand clocks?
[01:41] ryu
    With a sand clock, you know?
[01:42] ryu
    It's a clock, but it doesn't
    tell you what time it is.
[01:46] ryu
    It claims to be a time-telling device,
[01:47] ryu
    but it won't actually tell you the time.
[01:50] ryu
    So how is it a clock?
[01:51] io
    But isn't that true of a stopwatch, as well?
[01:55] ryu
    Oh, right.
[01:56] ryu
    But somehow that just doesn't sit right.
[01:59] at
    A sand clock is known as
    an "hourglass" in English.
[02:01] at
    It's not a watch or a clock.
[02:03] ryu
    Sand and glass? They're the same thing!
[02:05] en
    I can't believe you guys
[02:07] en
    kept this stupid conversation up this long.
[02:10] at
    En-chan, are you really one to talk?
[02:13] en
    What do you mean?
[02:17] yu
    You use a sand clock when
    you get an enema, right?
[02:20] both
    Enema?!
[02:21] yu
    Because after it goes in,
[02:22] yu
    you need to hold it in for a while.
[02:25] en
    Really?
[02:26] en
    I never knew sand clocks
    bore such a noble mission.
[02:29] ryu
    But Yumoto,
[02:30] ryu
    why do you know something so hardcore?
[02:33] yu
    Well, when I was little, my big brother would always make me...
[02:35] io
    We don't need to hear this.
[02:37] at
    They never change.
[02:39] at
    That Earth Defense Club!
[02:41] en
    You know, you're a member of it, too...
[02:47] gero
    I knew it!
[02:48] gero
    You're all here, eh?
[02:50] ari
    Hey there.
[02:51] yu
    Come on in!
[02:53] ryu
    What do you mean, you knew it?
[02:57] gero
    The Earth Defense Club
[02:59] gero
    can always be found marinating
    at Kurotama Bath.
[03:02] io
    Excellent observation.
[03:08] ari
    I initially turned up my nose at
    the thought of public bathing.
[03:11] ari
    But it's quite nice when you get used to it.
[03:14] en
    Right?
[03:15] en
    You can't stretch out in the bath at home.
[03:18] yu
    Go on!
[03:18] yu
    Sink right in down to your shoulders!
[03:21] yu
    Our hot water comes right from a hot spring!
[03:24] at
    Hey.
[03:32] at
    It's been a while.
[03:34] kusa
    We see each other in school every day.
[03:36] at
    Oh.
[03:37] at
    That's right.
[03:39] at
    I guess it's been hard, huh?
[03:42] kusa
    What has?
[03:44] at
    Well... you know...
[03:46] at
    stuff?
[03:48] kusa
    "Stuff"?
[03:49] kusa
    That's incredibly vague.
[03:51] at
    True...
[03:54] yu
    That reminds me.
[03:55] yu
    Aren't you student council
    guys gonna study abroad?
[03:58] ryu
    Hey!
[03:58] io
    Hush!
[04:00] kusa
    Yeah.
[04:01] kusa
    We head out tomorrow.
[04:02] yu
    Lucky!
[04:03] yu
    You know, I've never ever been on a plane!
[04:07] yu
    What does it feel like?
[04:09] kusa
    You just fly, like normal.
[04:12] yu
    Come on!
[04:13] yu
    But what's normal? That's I want to know!
[04:16] yu
    Is it exciting?
[04:18] yu
    Is it invigorating?!
[04:19] kusa
    It's not...
[04:21] kusa
    especially exciting.
[04:22] kusa
    Nor is it invigorating, I suppose.
[04:25] kusa
    I don't really know.
[04:28] en
    Yumoto! Yumoto!
[04:29] yu
    What?
[04:30] en
    Just get over here!
[04:32] yu
    Okay...
[04:34] en
    Leave the two of them alone.
[04:36] yu
    What?
[04:37] yu
    Here, you mean?
[04:39] io
    Yes, here!
[04:40] yu
    Why?
[04:41] en
    Because!
[04:43] gero
    Arima-san, have you finished
    your preparations?
[04:45] ari
    More or less.
[04:47] gero
    It doesn't feel real to me yet.
[04:51] ari
    Same here.
[04:53] ari
    But it's even worse for Kinshiro, I believe.
[04:57] kusa
    You seem rather busy.
[05:00] at
    No, things are pretty normal here.
[05:13] kusa
    Tomorrow—
[05:13] at
    How about—
[05:14] at
    What?
[05:15] kusa
    Nothing.
[05:17] at
    Tomorrow what?
[05:18] kusa
    Tomorrow...
[05:20] kusa
    I was wondering if anything was going on.
[05:23] at
    With me?
[05:24] at
    Well, you're flying out, right, Kin-chan?
[05:26] kusa
    No, not that.
[05:28] kusa
    I mean overall.
[05:29] at
    Overall?
[05:31] at
    I don't know.
[05:35] ryu
    Look at this!
[05:36] ryu
    It's hell! Sweet and sour pastry hell!
[05:39] en
    Just say it!
[05:40] en
    Say "I'll go see you off!"
[05:41] en
    Say "Come and see me off!"
[05:42] io
    Hey, back off.
[05:44] io
    The ice just started melting after so long.
[05:47] io
    Our job is just to watch and hope for the best.
[05:49] ari
    Something that's been balled up
     for so many years
[05:51] ari
    won't untangle that easily.
[05:53] io
    You said it, Arima-san.
[05:55] yu
    Huh? What do you mean?
[05:56] yu
    What won't untangle?
[05:58] all
    Never mind! You just sit!
[06:03] yu
    But President Kusatsu
[06:04] yu
    looks a lot like Mr. Tawarayama right now!
[06:07] ryu
    You mean the blank expression?
    That's typical for him.
[06:09] en
    Yeah...
[06:11] yu
    No!
[06:12] yu
    I mean he's floating, with Atsushi-senpai!
[06:17] en
    Did they pass out from the heat?
[06:19] gero
    President!
SIGN    Love, Once More!
[06:30] en
    Knowing Atsushi,
[06:32] en
    he felt awkward pushing to come see him off
[06:34] en
    when he wasn't invited.
[06:36] ari
    And Kinshiro probably thought
[06:37] ari
    asking him to come see him off
[06:39] ari
    would be a shameless request.
[06:42] yu
    They could have just said it.
[06:44] yu
    Why didn't they say it?
[06:46] io
    Things are complicated
    when you're a grown-up.
[06:51] ari
    Are you awake, Kinshiro?
[06:55] yu
    Are you okay?
[06:57] kusa
    I seem to have fainted.
[06:59] kusa
    I'm sorry for the trouble.
[07:05] yu
    Atsushi-senpai's not awake yet!
[07:08] kusa
    Well,
[07:09] kusa
    I have to get home soon
[07:11] kusa
    to get ready for tomorrow.
[07:12] ari
    Here!
[07:13] kusa
    Thank you.
[07:15] kusa
    Now, Earth Defense Club.
[07:17] kusa
    Please try not to cause any
    trouble while we're abroad.
[07:20] yu
    Oh, yeah!
[07:21] yu
    Could we come to see you off tomorrow?
[07:26] yu
    I want to see a plane!
[07:27] yu
    Can we?
[07:30] gero
    What should we do, President?
[07:32] kusa
    If you want to come, do so.
[07:34] kusa
    We have no authority to stop you.
[07:36] gero
    Well, I guess that's that.
[07:39] ari
    See you.
[07:40] yu
    Yes!
[07:42] en
    Atsushi, you okay?
[07:44] ryu
    The student council just left.
[07:46] atsu
    I know.
[07:49] atsu
    Yumoto...
[07:51] atsu
    Thanks.
[07:52] yu
    For what?
[07:53] atsu
    Well... nothing.
[07:56] yu
    Atsushi-senpai, are you cold?
[07:58] en
    Should we go back in?
[08:00] ryu
    Sure.
[08:01] ryu
    I don't have any dates to go on today.
[08:03] io
    And the Tokyo markets are already closed.
[08:11] en
    Atsushi, you're way too dere.
[08:13] atsu
    Me?
[08:14] atsu
    Really?
[08:17] atsu
    I was thinking, in hindsight,
[08:19] atsu
    the Battle Lovers wasn't bad at all.
[08:23] en
    You think?
[08:24] en
    These things are the root of all evil.
[08:26] atsu
    I know, that's why I said "in hindsight."
[08:29] atsu
    All's well that ends well, you know?
[08:31] ryu
    Kinugawa-senpai, you're really generous.
[08:34] io
    Very far-sighted thinking.
[08:36] yu
    I had fun with our Battle
    Lover club activity, too!
[08:39] four
    Don't call it a club activity!
[08:41] yu
    We just need Wom-san
    and Mr. Tawarayama to show up,
[08:44] yu
    and we'll have the whole gang!
[08:46] en
    Speak of the devil.
[08:48] both
    Wom-san?
[08:51] mon
    I am...
[08:51] yu
    An hourglass!
[08:52] mon
    Don't call me by such a cheap name!
[08:54] mon
    I am...
[08:55] yu
    Hourglass Monster!
[08:56] mon
    Silence!
[08:57] mon
    I mean, stop time!
[09:00] mon
    I am wonderful!
[09:04] mon
    Evolution, change,
    and growth are unnecessary!
[09:07] mon
    I live now only for this moment!
[09:10] mon
    Live! For! The present!
[09:11] mon
    Life Now!
[09:14] mon
    Did you behold my power?
[09:16] mon
    Time Stopper!
[09:19] yu
    Wow, he startled me!
[09:21] yu
    He startled me so much I forgot to breathe!
[09:23] ryu
    He's sounding kind of cool, though...
[09:25] io
    You think that's cool? Really?
[09:28] io
    I mean, I know "Show Stopper"...
[09:30] en
    But why a monster?
[09:32] en
    I thought we beat Zundar and Hireashi.
[09:34] atsu
    He should have been demoted to assistant director.
[09:37] yu
    You intend to stand against us, do you?
[09:39] yu
    Senpais!
[09:40] yu
    Let's Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[09:43] yu
    Love Making!
[09:45] mon
    I don't think so!
[09:54] yu
    The Lovracelets... disappeared?
[09:57] [Messenger] sign
    Messenger of Love From Space
    Wombat
    Special Abilities:
     Highly Advanced Scientific Technology
[10:08] ryu
    Wow, you can really see the tan line!
[10:10] atsu
    Focus on the real issue!
[10:12] mon
    Attention, Battle Lovers!
[10:15] mon
    Your time ends now.
[10:17] mon
    For, you see...
[10:18] mon
    I will end you all!
[10:21] en
    Wait!
[10:23] en
    How did you know we're the Battle Lovers?
[10:29] mon
    That's not all I know!
[10:31] mon
    Your faces and voices are blur-free
[10:34] mon
    and exposed!
[10:36] en
    No way!
[10:37] mon
    Yes way!
[10:41] atsu
    En-chan!
[10:42] at
    I don't know who you're working for,
[10:45] at
    but this is a violation of privacy laws!
[10:49] mon
    You won't need privacy when you're dead!
[10:51] ryu
    Why, you...
[10:53] io
    We won't let you...
[10:55] ryu
    I can't move!
[10:56] at
    En-chan!
[10:57] yu
    Darn it.
[10:58] yu
    This weirdo wouldn't be able
[11:00] yu
    to push us around if we could Love Making!
[11:03] mon
    Sorry, but that's not in your futures!
[11:05] mon
    Sleep in the hour of repose known as death!
[11:14] goro
    Is someone horsing around in the bath?!
[11:18] goro
    Who are you?!
[11:19] yu
    Big bro!
[11:21] goro
    And he's kicking sand around, too!
[11:23] goro
    What the hell made you think that was okay?!
[11:26] mon
    Well...
[11:29] mon
    Oh, there's a very important galaxy-spanning reason...
[11:32] goro
    Someone who can't wash off
[11:34] goro
    before getting in the bath,
    talking about the galaxy?!
[11:36] goro
    What kind of crap is that?!
[11:39] mon
    I'm sorry!
[11:40] mon
    I'll come back later!
[11:42] goro
    Hold on!
[11:43] goro
    Clean this up first!
[11:45] goro
    Yumoto.
[11:46] yu
    Yes?
[11:47] goro
    Choose better friends.
[11:50] ryu
    What?
[11:51] ryu
    Don't tell the student council?
[11:53] io
    Why not?
[11:54] en
    They're about to go study abroad.
[11:57] en
    I don't want to worry them.
[11:59] ryu
    But what if Zundar's
    pulling the strings again?
[12:03] atsu
    No way.
[12:04] atsu
    Kin-chan wouldn't do anything so cowardly.
[12:07] ryu
    Sorry.
[12:10] en
    You have nothing to apologize for, Ryuu.
[12:12] en
    But if they're not behind it,
[12:15] en
    we have to figure out what
    the hell happened yesterday.
[12:19] atsu
    En-chan, what's wrong?
SIGN    Monthly
    Shounen GUNP
[12:23] ryu
    Hey! That's my GUNP!
[12:27] mon
    You snuck up on me! You cowards!
[12:28] en
    No, you just weren't paying attention.
[12:31] ryu
    Give it back!
[12:37] io
    Ryuu!
[12:39] atsu
    Time Stopping Monster-san!
[12:40] atsu
    We'd like a word with you.
[12:42] mon
    Oh? I'll hear you out.
[12:44] en
    What, he's okay being called that?
[12:46] atsu
    We need to go and see off
    some friends at the airport.
[12:50] atsu
    You can read that if you want,
[12:51] atsu
    so can we meet you back here?
[12:53] ryu
    Huh? That's my GUNP!
[12:54] mon
    I see!
[12:55] mon
    Stop the time on the fight, then?
[12:58] atsu
    That's right!
[12:58] atsu
    Exactly!
[12:59] mon
    It won't be that easy!
[13:02] ryu
    Hey! My GUNP!
[13:04] io
    That's property damage!
[13:05] ryu
    Now you'll pay!
[13:06] io
    Although we always intended to make you pay!
[13:10] yu
    Hey, quit getting sand
    all over the club room!
[13:14] en
    Wait!
[13:15] mon
    Without your Love Power,
[13:17] mon
    you are no match for me!
[13:23] hi
    Look at that.
[13:25] hi
    They're as pathetic as turtles
    turned over onto their backs.
[13:27] tsu
    Stop it.
[13:29] tsu
    That's an insult...
[13:30] tsu
    to the turtles.
[13:31] hi
    That's right. They're less than turtles.
[13:34] tsu
    Yes,
[13:35] tsu
    they're pathetic water fleas.
[13:37] dada
    They'll be pulverized, at this rate.
[13:45] mon
    Now... It's time to end this!
[13:50] wom
    Hey! Hold on a minute!
[13:54] yu
    That voice!
[14:01] wom
    I'm here!
[14:04] yu
    Wom-san!
[14:05] wom
    My name is Wombat.
[14:08] wom
    The messenger of love,
[14:09] wom
    who loves the Earth and protects it!
[14:11] mon
    Wh-What?!
[14:13] atsu
    What?
[14:14] atsu
    You used to say you weren't a wombat.
[14:17] wom
    Now that I am here, there's no need to fear!
[14:21] wom
    You who are without love...
[14:23] wom
    At last, love is... love will...
[14:29] yu
    Wom-san, you're so wriggly!
[14:31] wom
    Anyway, put these on already!
[14:39] wom
    I thought something like this might happen,
[14:41] wom
    so here are your new True Lovracelets!
[14:44] ryu
    He thought something
    like this might happen?
[14:47] io
    We have to transform again?
[14:49] wom
    Of course!
[14:51] wom
    Let's go, everyone!
[14:54] yu
    Love Making!
[15:21] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[15:24] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[15:26] en
    Love Making.
[15:37] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[15:39] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[15:42] atsu
    Love Making.
[15:51] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[15:53] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[15:56] io
    Love Making.
[16:06] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[16:08] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[16:11] ryu
    Love Making!
[16:21] ryu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[16:23] ryu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[16:25] en
    This love-filled planet
[16:27] en
    will not abide those who lack love!
[16:29] ryu
    Those who wield loveless power
[16:31] ryu
    must kneel before love!
[16:33] io
    Love is power!
[16:34] io
    Love is hope!
[16:36] atsu
    Be born for love!
[16:38] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[16:40] yu
    Love!
[16:40] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[16:44] five
    Battle Lovers!
[16:45] yu
    Feel the power...
[16:47] five
    of love!
[16:50] io
    What? Did our costumes change?
[16:53] ryu
    Yeah, they're different from before!
[16:56] wom
    In season 2,
    your items and designs always change.
[16:59] wom
    That is the law of the universe!
[17:01] wom
    The providence of nature!
[17:04] wom
    And it's not just how they look!
[17:06] wom
    You've also powered up,
[17:08] wom
    and you boast a far more vivid design,
[17:11] wom
    invoking a taste of the
    "now" and the "young"!
[17:16] en
    I've given up looking
    for taste from this guy.
[17:20] atsu
    Let's just beat this thing
    and get to the airport.
[17:23] en
    Yeah.
[17:24] en
    Cerulean Love Aqua!
[17:29] mon
    Curse you!
[17:30] yu
    En-chan-senpai! I'll do it too!
[17:32] yu
    Scarlet Love Lumiere!
[17:37] ryu
    Yeah! Go! Do it!
[17:39] ryu
    Vesta Love Ignit!
[17:42] io
    I beg your pardon!
[17:43] io
    Sulfur Love Gaia!
[17:48] atsu
    You guys don't hold back, huh?
[17:51] yu
    Atsushi-senpai, aren't you going to join in?
[17:54] atsu
    Oh, I am.
[17:55] atsu
    Epinard Love Hurricane!
[18:02] ryu
    Wow.
[18:04] ryu
    Harsh.
[18:05] io
    Never get on Kinugawa-senpai's bad side, huh?
[18:15] mon
    You think those trivial attacks
    will be enough to beat me?!
[18:18] ryu
    Well, you do seem to be crying.
[18:20] mon
    I haven't actually gotten serious yet!
[18:23] mon
    The real battle is just getting started.
[18:25] io
    He's surprisingly tenacious.
[18:27] en
    Stubborn's more like it.
[18:28] mon
    Orifice Tornado!
[18:33] ann
    JNA flight 62 will begin boarding shortly.
[18:37] ann
    Boarding passengers please come to gate 21.
[18:38] gero
    I guess they're not coming.
[18:41] gero
    Well, it's the Earth Defense Club.
[18:43] gero
    I guess we shouldn't have
    trusted them to start with.
[18:46] kin
    They'll come.
[18:47] kin
    At-chan will keep his promise.
[18:50] ari
    Maybe he got put on day shift,
     or an errand came up?
[18:53] ari
    Or something...
[18:56] ann
    JNA will begin boarding shortly.
[18:59] ann
    Boarding passengers please come to gate 21.
[19:05] kusa
    Let's go.
[19:06] kusa
    We can't be late to board.
[19:12] atsu
    No...
[19:13] atsu
    I must be there to see them off!
[19:23] mon
    If I defeat you...
[19:25] mon
    no one will be able to
    move time forward for me!
[19:28] mon
    I will be eternal!
[19:31] yu
    Who wants eternity like that?!
[19:33] mon
    What?!
[19:34] yu
    Fearing change is like moving backwards!
[19:38] yu
    Moving forward is
[19:39] yu
    what lets a person get stronger
    and achieve their dreams!
[19:43] yu
    So now that we're stronger,
    you can't beat us!
[19:47] mon
    Wh-Wh-Wh-What?!
[19:50] yu
    Now!
[19:53] yu
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[19:58] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[20:01] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[20:05] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[20:08] ryu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[20:22] yu
    True Love Attack!
[20:36] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[20:52] yu
    Love is over!
[20:54] all
    We told you, it's not!
[20:57] yu
    I know this guy.
SIGN    Tokiwa Tomaru
[20:59] yu
    It's Tokiwa Tomaru from the next class over.
[21:01] atsu
    He was born on April 2nd,
[21:03] atsu
    and really hates being the first
    one in the class to get a year older.
[21:07] en
    Even so, you can't stop time.
[21:10] yu
    Besides...
SIGN    Bath Coupon
    Kurotama Bath
[21:11] yu
    Time doesn't betray dreams.
[21:14] io
    Actually, I think we're
[21:15] io
    on the verge of betraying a dream right now...
[21:19] io
    The president's.
[21:20] atsu
    Their flight's about to take off!
[21:39] kusa
    At-chan!
[21:48] yu
    He noticed!
[21:49] yu
    He's waving!
[21:50] wom
    Don't shake me!
[21:54] en
    He won't be gone forever.
[21:56] en
    He'll be back before you know it.
[22:01] atsu
    Yeah.
[22:03] yu
    Oh, yeah.
[22:03] yu
    By the way, where's Mr. Tawarayama?
[22:06] wom
    Erk!
[22:07] wom
    A-Actually...
[22:19] ni
    Hey,
[22:20] ni
    do you know where the staff office is?
[22:22] tsu
    We're joining Binan High School
[22:26] tsu
    as exchange students.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is a Mayfly
[24:01] yu
    Next time: "Love is a Mayfly!"
[24:03] yu
    Love Making!
[24:05] ---
    

Season 2

2 - Love is a Mayfly

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] aki
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] both
    --
[00:00] guard
    --
[00:17] haru
    Aki, silent guardian with eyes of ice,
[00:20] haru
    a question for you.
[00:21] haru
    What is an idol?
[00:23] aki
    One with overwhelming power,
    who cannot be replaced.
[00:27] aki
    Haru, blazing deceiver wreathed in light,
[00:31] aki
    a question for you.
[00:33] aki
    What is an idol?
[00:34] haru
    One who guides and commands the world.
[00:39] haru
    The object of worship for all things
    in creation. That is what we will be.
[00:44] aki
    No... what we must be.
[00:47] both
    This is the vow we have made to the universe!
[00:55] aki
    And if anyone...
[00:57] haru
    ...opposes us...
[00:59] both
    We'll destroy them.
SIGN    Love is a Mayfly
[02:41] ai
    What is the greatest sin that man can commit?
[02:46] ai
    Is it sloth?
[02:48] ai
    Envy?
[02:50] ai
    Wrath?
[02:51] ai
    No.
[02:52] ai
    There is a sin that causes
    even more suffering.
[02:55] ai
    That sin is...
[02:59] ai
    Beauty!
SIGN    Ouso Tsukuro
[03:05] ai
    Everyone runs in fear of my beauty!
[03:08] ai
    Truly, beauty is the greatest sin!
[03:11] stu
    That guy's such a creep.
[03:12] stu
    He says he has twenty TVs...
[03:14] stu
    And that he's best friends
    with celebrities and stuff.
[03:16] stu
    Not even little kids try to pull
    those kinds of lies nowadays.
[03:19] stu
    This one time, I lost it and said "Oh,
    yeah? Then let's see your ten pet lions!"
[03:24] stu
    and started walking to his house.
[03:26] stu
    What happened?
[03:27] stu
    On the way there, he
    started writhing in pain.
[03:30] stu
    How come?
[03:31] stu
    He said a long time ago, an alien placed
    a curse on his right hand and his heart,
[03:34] stu
    and it had just started acting up.
[03:37] stu
    Oh, please. What a geek.
[03:38] stu
    I couldn't believe it. I started
    feeling kind of sorry for him.
[03:41] ai
    They're not lies!
[03:42] stu
    So I just went home.
[03:43] ai
    They're not lies!
[03:46] ai
    Why won't anyone believe me?!
[03:50] stu
    What the hell?
[03:51] ai
    In my mind, I can see the 4K TVs,
[03:54] ai
    the lions, and the aliens clear as day!
[04:03] ai
    Is it that they're too beguiled by my beauty?
[04:07] ai
    I confuse them so badly,
[04:09] ai
    they refuse to believe the things I say?
[04:11] ai
    Is it this sorrow that makes me beautiful?
[04:16] ai
    That's it!
[04:17] ai
    Beauty is sorrow.
[04:20] haru
    Fool.
[04:21] haru
    Beauty is strength.
[04:24] aki
    Wrong.
[04:25] aki
    Beauty is wit.
[04:27] ai
    Who's there?
[04:28] ai
    Aliens?
[04:29] ai
    My real mommy?
[04:31] ai
    Or some charming,
[04:33] ai
    sexy devil come to kidnap me?
[04:35] haru
    Wrong and wrong, stupid.
[04:37] aki
    Although "devil" was closest, I suppose.
[04:43] haru
    You see, we want...
[04:46] both
    To corrupt you.
[04:47] aki
    That's why we're here.
SIGN    1584th Pretty Boy Contest
[04:55] stu
    Already time for the pretty
    boy contest again, huh?
[04:57] stu
    I wonder who'll win this time.
[05:00] ai
    You're so ignorant.
[05:02] ai
    To stand atop something so small
[05:05] ai
    is a miniscule concern.
[05:08] ai
    I've met the people who stand
[05:11] ai
    at the very top of the world!
[05:14] ai
    One like the sun who makes my blood run hot,
[05:18] ai
    and one like the moon who
    chills my soul to the core!
[05:22] stu
    Look, we've had enough.
[05:24] stu
    We're not falling for your lies again.
[05:26] ai
    It's not a lie!
[05:27] ai
    I really met them!
[05:32] haru
    Hey, watch where you're running.
[05:35] aki
    Can you stand?
[05:37] ai
    You're...
[05:39] haru
    Here through the exchange
    program. Beppu Haruhiko.
[05:42] aki
    And I am Akihiko.
[05:44] aki
    We're supposed to be joining
    the 2nd year class.
[05:50] haru
    Are our faces that weird to you?
[05:52] aki
    Haru.
[05:53] aki
    You mustn't be so confrontational.
[05:55] aki
    I'm sure they've rarely seen our like before.
[05:57] aki
    They've never seen exchange students, either.
[06:00] haru
    Oh, I see.
[06:02] haru
    Anyway, pleased to meet you.
[06:04] ai
    No, it is we who are pleased!
[06:06] ai
    Haruhiko-san! Akihiko-san!
[06:08] ai
    See? You get it now?
[06:11] ai
    I don't lie—
[06:13] kiro
    Beg your pardon! Press Society here!
[06:15] kino
    Arriving like a bolt out of the blue,
[06:17] kino
    Beppu Haruhiko-san and Akihiko-san.
[06:19] kino
    What are your hobbies?
[06:21] haru
    Bonsai, gardening, and
    horseback riding, I suppose.
[06:24] haru
    Although I don't think I'll
    be able to do that here.
[06:27] aki
    I enjoy calligraphy.
[06:29] aki
    And I love to play Hungarian
    Pastoral Fantasy on the flute.
[06:33] kino
    Yes, yes, yes!
[06:34] kino
    How celebrity and executive of you!
[06:37] kino
    So, any intention to participate
    in the Pretty Boy Contest?
[06:40] haru
    What's that?
[06:41] aki
    We only just moved here,
[06:43] aki
    so we're still getting our bearings.
[06:47] ai
    All questions must go through me!
[06:50] kino
    And who are you, exactly?
[06:52] ai
    I'm their number one worshipper and caretaker!
[06:56] sm
    Isn't that nice?
[06:57] bu
    Interesting!
[07:00] bu
    I can feel my biceps humming.
[07:03] sm
    I invite you to a duel of neurons!
[07:05] en
    I've been thinking...
[07:08] atsu
    What?
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[07:08] io
    About what?
[07:10] en
    What are the conditions for
    being a main character?
[07:13] atsu
    You've lost me.
[07:15] en
    In the TV show known as life,
[07:18] en
    there's a clear difference between main
    characters and a side character, right?
[07:21] atsu
    True.
[07:23] en
    So what separates a main
    character and a side character?
[07:25] atsu
    Good question.
[07:28] en
    The kinds of people
[07:29] en
    who don't appear until 8 minutes
    and 30 seconds into the episode
[07:32] en
    can't be the main characters, right?
[07:33] en
    No, they can't.
[07:34] atsu
    I think it's okay, as long as they
    get a lot to do in the second half.
[07:38] en
    Oh, really?
[07:39] atsu
    Of course, I'm a side-character type,
[07:41] atsu
    so I don't know a lot about main characters.
[07:44] io
    Oh, no.
[07:45] io
    You're definitely a leading
    man, Kinugawa-senpai.
[07:47] io
    Like tofu in broth.
[07:49] atsu
    Does that count as a leading man?
[07:52] ryu
    I love tofu!
[07:54] ryu
    You can kill a man with it!
[07:56] en
    It's a deadly weapon?
[07:57] en
    But I suppose Atsushi can be frightening
    in the right circumstances.
[08:00] tsu
    What are you talking about?
[08:02] tsu
    I'm hesitant in everything,
[08:04] tsu
    even when fighting as the Battle Lovers.
[08:06] en
    The fact that you can say that without batting
    an eye just makes you more frightening.
[08:09] io
    Actually, yeah.
[08:10] ryu
    Good point.
[08:12] wom
    Please, please, please, please stop!
[08:13] yu
    Speaking of which,
[08:14] yu
    there's something I've been
    thinking about for a while.
[08:16] yu
    Could that monster we fought
    be a leftover from last time?
[08:19] en
    No way.
[08:22] en
    There's no way you've been thinking
    about that for a while, Yumoto.
[08:25] io
    That's the part you're denying?
[08:26] ryu
    He probably just thought of it.
[08:28] atsu
    Now, now.
[08:29] atsu
    Let's hear him out.
[08:31] atsu
    So?
[08:32] yu
    The student council didn't send him out,
[08:35] yu
    and Wom-san probably didn't, either.
[08:36] yu
    So what could it be?
[08:38] wom
    W-Wait a moment!
[08:39] wom
    What's all this "Wom-san probably didn't" stuff?!
[08:43] yu
    Don't you worry!
[08:45] yu
    No matter what happens,
[08:46] yu
    I believe you, Wom-san!
[08:49] wom
    You do not!
[08:50] wom
    You clearly do not!
[08:50] en
    Well, we saw what you did to Mr. Tawarayama.
[08:55] wom
    The life I brought slipped out!
[08:57] wom
    It was an accident! An accident, I swear!
[09:00] kino
    What an incredible development!
[09:02] kino
    Are we about to see a
    no-holds-barred bloodbath?!
[09:06] bu
    Boxing can hurt,
[09:07] bu
    so we'll compete with feats of strength!
SIGN    Grip Strength
SIGN    Sidesteps
SIGN    Pull-Ups
[09:21] haru
    I have to give you credit.
[09:23] haru
    You did have the guts to challenge me.
[09:25] ai
    Haruhiko-sama!
[09:27] kino
    Next, battle of brains!
[09:30] shir
    Could they be taking on
    the Millenium Problems?!
[09:33] chi
    There wouldn't be anyone capable of judging it.
SIGN    10 x 10 equation
[09:36] chi
    We'll do a 10 x 10 equation!
[09:39] aki
    I'm done.
[09:40] chi
    Wh-What?!
[09:41] aki
    Your time would be better spent studying
[09:43] aki
    than challenging me, don't you think?
[09:46] both
    Akihiko-sama!
[09:51] en
    The main/side character stuff reminded me.
[09:53] atsu
    What?
[09:54] en
    Isn't it almost time for
    the Pretty Boy Contest?
[09:57] ryu
    Oh yeah, that's right.
[09:59] io
    What? But you were so fired
    up about it before...
[10:02] ryu
    Yeah, but I've kind of stopped caring.
[10:05] atsu
    I feel your thermal conductivity, Ryuu.
[10:08] ryuu
    Huh?
[10:09] ryuu
    Hey, what's that supposed to mean?
[10:12] yu
    Speaking of which. In front of my house...
[10:14] en
    Yumoto's defaulting to "speaking
    of which" a lot today.
[10:17] atsu
    In the real world,
    who actually says, "speaking of which"?
[10:22] en
    Same with "The aforementioned"
[10:23] en
    and "It just occurred to me"
[10:24] en
    or "Such-and-such"...
[10:28] yu
    Just forget that and listen to me!
[10:31] en
    Fine, fine.
[10:32] atsu
    So, what is it?
[10:34] kino
    Shogi competition!
[10:36] haru
    Check mate.
[10:38] haru
    Bow before me for eternity.
[10:41] four
    Yes, forever!
[10:43] four
    Squee!
[10:44] kino
    Cooking competition!
[10:45] haru
    7.32 meters.
[10:48] aki
    My flavors might be poisonous for you.
[10:51] aki
    Since you'll never get it out of your mind.
[10:53] all
    Squee!
[10:55] kino
    Sewing competition!
[10:57] haru
    Take good care of this for me.
[11:00] haru
    And I'll take good care of you.
[11:02] all
    Squee!
[11:03] kino
    Fencing competition!
[11:07] aki
    I've run your heart through.
[11:09] all
    Squee!
[11:11] ai
    More! Treat me with more contempt!
[11:13] ai
    Look down your nose at me!
[11:17] ai
    The eternal pretty boys of Binan High School,
[11:19] ai
    Haruhiko-sama, Akihiko-sama.
[11:21] ai
    We swear our eternal worship
    and submission to you!
[11:23] all
    We do!
[11:24] haru
    What a burden.
[11:26] aki
    Don't be like that, Haru.
[11:29] ai
    Oh, no! Haru-sama, Aki-sama!
[11:31] ai
    We don't intend to force ourselves on you!
[11:34] ai
    We just really needed to...
[11:39] ai
    I-I'm sorry!
[11:40] ai
    We thought about our needs,
    but not about your feelings!
[11:44] haru
    I feel like the king of the monkey pen.
[11:47] aki
    Truly, they are apes.
SIGN    The Sparkling Prince Battle Lover Scarlet Finishing Move: Scarlet Love Lumiere True Love Attack
[11:55] yu
    See?
[11:56] yu
    It's there, like I said!
[11:58] atsu
    When did they put up a building like this?
[12:00] ryu
    It looks like a castle.
[12:02] en
    Looks like a love hotel.
[12:04] io
    Nah, love hotels are cheaper than that.
[12:06] io
    This thing's at least two million yen per square meter.
[12:09] en
    How do you know that?
[12:11] en
    Instinct?
[12:12] io
    I do have my real estate
    broker license, you know.
[12:15] yu
    Do you think it's a house?
[12:18] atsu
    If it's not a love hotel, it must be.
[12:21] en
    I could have done without hearing
    Atsushi say "love hotel."
[12:25] ryu
    Same here.
[12:26] io
    I agree.
[12:27] atsu
    Why?!
[12:28] yu
    What's a love hotel?
[12:33] en
    What is this feeling? Motherly instinct?
[12:35] atsu
    The smell of innocence.
[12:37] atsu
    It's so soothing!
[12:38] io
    Never change, Yumoto.
[12:40] ryu
    Yes, remain ignorant!
[12:42] yu
    Hey! What was that?!
[12:42] wom
    A true heir to the throne of love!
[12:46] yu
    Darn it!
[12:50] yu
    Oh, are you customers?
[12:52] yu
    Come on in! The bath's open right now!
[12:55] haru
    Did you hear that? "Customers," he says.
[12:57] aki
    Let it go, Haru. That's the class
    of person we're dealing with.
[13:01] aki
    We've moved into the house across the way.
[13:04] yu
    Oh, really?
[13:06] yu
    We were saying, it looks like
    a love hotel! Just amazi—
[13:11] en
    We apologize on his behalf.
[13:13] atsu
    He just meant that it was very impressive.
[13:16] haru
    We won't forget your face, Hakone Yumoto.
[13:19] aki
    I'm sure we'll be speaking again, very soon.
[13:22] aki
    We hope you'll be accommodating.
[13:23] yu
    Yeah, sure thing!
[13:25] yu
    Oh, that's right!
SIGN    Bath Coupon
    Kurotama Bath
[13:27] yu
    Here, these are coupons for our bath!
[13:30] yu
    Please use them!
[13:33] haru
    I'm horribly grateful.
[13:35] aki
    We'll treasure them.
[13:45] ai
    Hey... Haruhiko-sama? Akihiko-sama?
[13:49] ai
    I'm very grateful to you for inviting me...
[13:51] ai
    But being the only one here...
[13:53] ai
    I'm just delighted... awe-struck, really...
[13:58] dada
    Ladies... of which there are none.
[14:01] dada
    Gentlemen!
[14:02] dada
    Welcome to the VEPP Theater.
[14:05] ai
    Huh? Did he say Beppu Theater?
[14:07] dada
    I'm proud to introduce that marvelous duo...
[14:11] dada
    The VEPPer!
[14:14] ai
    English? Vapor?
[14:16] dada
    Now's the time!
[14:17] dada
    Enjoy the show!
[14:24] both
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[14:30] both
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[14:34] both
    On the name of the stars!
[14:44] both
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[14:50] both
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[14:52] both
    The twin stars shining in the heaven!
[14:54] haru
    Salty Sol!
[14:56] aki
    Melty Luna!
[14:59] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[15:03] both
    Chosen warrior!
[15:05] haru
    Lucky you!
[15:07] aki
    Happy you!
[15:09] both
    Shooting...
[15:10] both
    Star!
[15:19] go
    We have new neighbors across
    from the bath, then?
[15:23] yu
    I wonder if they'll use our coupons!
[15:25] go
    I'm sure they will.
[15:27] yu
    Yeah!
[15:32] yu
    By the way, big bro...
[15:34] yu
    What's a love hotel?
[15:39] yu
    You don't know, either?
[15:41] go
    I'm sorry.
[15:42] yu
    Why are you apologizing?
[16:02] tofu
    My name is Tofu Monster!
[16:04] tofu
    I possess the delicate mind
[16:07] tofu
    and silky white beauty of tofu!
[16:13] wom
    It's time to Love Making
    into the Battle Lovers!
[16:16] en
    We left our curry back there...
[16:18] atsu
    What a waste.
[16:20] ryu
    I had to cut off a great texting session!
[16:22] io
    I was just thinking about the London markets.
[16:24] wom
    Get to the Love Making already!
[16:27] yu
    Let's finish it up quick!
[16:30] yu
    Love Making!
[16:35] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[16:38] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[16:41] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[16:42] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[16:45] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[16:47] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[16:50] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[16:52] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[16:55] ryu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[16:57] ryu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[16:59] en
    This love-filled planet will
    not abide those who lack love!
[17:03] ryu
    Those who wield loveless
    power must kneel before love!
[17:07] io
    Love is power!
[17:08] io
    Love is hope!
[17:10] atsu
    Be born for love!
[17:12] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[17:14] yu
    Love!
[17:15] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[17:18] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:19] yu
    Feel the power...
[17:21] five
    Of love!
[17:24] yu
    I don't care if you're tofu or atsu-age!
[17:27] yu
    I want to know why you're
    here, and who sent you!
[17:32] tofu
    If you want to know, you'll
    have to beat me first!
[17:35] tofu
    Domestically-Grown GMO-Free Soybean Shot!
[17:45] tofu
    Tofu is made from soybeans, you know!
[17:47] en
    Obviously!
[17:48] en
    But don't you think you're better than just soybeans?
[17:50] tofu
    Tofu doesn't judge!
[17:52] tofu
    Soy Curd Storm!
[17:58] ryu
    I can't stand curd! It's so gross and mushy!
[18:02] tofu
    Be consumed by the dilemma
[18:03] tofu
    of having to eat fragile
    food with chopsticks!
[18:06] ryu
    It's sticking in my throat!
[18:09] atsu
    I don't think I like this monster.
[18:11] en
    Is there any monster you do like?!
[18:17] en
    The curds...
[18:18] yu
    They're so slick...
[18:20] ryu
    This guy's stronger than I thought!
[18:22] io
    What should we do?
[18:37] yu
    Stop wasting food!
[18:40] yu
    Scarlet Love Lumiere!
[18:42] mon
    Chilled tofu?!
[18:48] io
    At least soybean isoflavone
    is a great moisturizer...
[18:52] mon
    Y-You can't beat me!
[18:54] mon
    I'm delicate and beautiful!
[18:57] yu
    Don't avert your eyes from the truth!
[18:59] yu
    Even if you are tofu, right now,
[19:01] yu
    you're the tofu dregs left behind in the pot!
[19:04] yu
    But whether you get recycled
    for rice porridge the next day
[19:06] yu
    is up to you!
[19:12] yu
    True Love Attack!
[19:25] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[19:40] yu
    Love is over!
[19:43] ryu
    Hey, he's from C class...
[19:45] io
    Oh, I remember him.
[19:47] atsu
    Someone definitely made him a monster, then.
[19:50] yu
    Speaking of which, we forgot to
    ask about the monsters' boss!
[19:54] en
    That's a proper use of "speaking
    of which," at least.
[20:05] yu
    Senpai!
[20:06] yu
    What's that there?
[20:10] haru
    Five of them, and not a
    decent-looking one in the bunch.
[20:12] haru
    Just trash from start to finish.
[20:14] aki
    Really?
[20:15] aki
    I suppose there might be one
    or two eccentrics out there
[20:18] aki
    who they might appeal to.
[20:21] yu
    What was that, you guys?!
[20:23] ryu
    If they're blurring their faces like that...
[20:26] io
    They must be using advanced
    technology like ours.
[20:30] en
    And they seem to be naturally rude.
[20:32] atsu
    Not pleasant at all.
[20:35] haru
    I see no reason to be
    considerate of your feelings.
[20:39] aki
    We're inconsiderately
[20:41] aki
    going to be wiping you out soon, after all.
[20:45] ryu
    The hell do you mean "wiping us out"?
[20:48] haru
    We, the VEPPer,
[20:49] haru
    cannot allow your continued existence.
[20:53] haru
    Understand, loser nerds?
[20:55] io
    Are you trying to pick a fight with us?
[20:58] aki
    Did you finally catch on?
[21:01] aki
    You're awfully slow on the
    uptake. It worries me.
[21:10] dada
    That's enough for today.
[21:13] dada
    We don't want you catching
    their nerd lameness.
[21:16] aki
    You're so right, Dadacha.
[21:19] haru
    Well, you're not going to have
    a comfortable night from now on.
[21:22] haru
    Keep that in mind, loser nerds.
[21:24] en
    Wait, you...
[21:29] yu
    Just who were those guys?
[21:39] go
    What's all this?
[21:40] haru
    You're horribly in our way, apes.
[21:42] aki
    Come on, you're making trouble.
[21:45] aki
    Make way.
[21:52] haru
    Chopping wood?
[21:53] aki
    That must be hard work.
[21:54] go
    Oh, thank you.
[21:57] both
    Excuse us.
[22:10] go
    What was that all about?
[22:20] guard
    We, the Beppu Apes
[22:21] guard
    stand ready to serve you.
    Haru-sama, Aki-sama.
[22:25] guard
    Your wish is our command.
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    Brotherly Love
[24:01] en
    Next time, "Brotherly Love."
[24:04] en
    Love Making!
[24:05] ---
    

Season 2

3 - Brotherly Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] dada
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] yu
    --
[00:00] dada
    --
[00:20] (Flashback) go
    What's wrong, Yumoto?
[00:22] (Flashback) yu
    Big bro...
[00:23] (Flashback) go
    Were you in a fight?
[00:24] (Flashback) yu
    I didn't hit them...
[00:26] (Flashback) yu
    because you always tell me...
[00:27] (Flashback) yu
    it's not good to hit friends...
[00:31] (Flashback) go
    They hit you, but you didn't fight back?
[00:37] (Flashback) go
    Good job, Yumoto.
[00:39] (Flashback) yu
    Big bro!
[00:41] (Flashback) go
    Listen, Yumoto. The moon is
    there, even during the day.
[00:47] (Flashback) go
    Morning and night, it stands
    watch over you from the sky.
[00:51] (Flashback) go
    And me, too.
[00:52] (Flashback) go
    When you're suffering, when
    you're sad, look up at the sky.
[00:56] (Flashback) go
    The daytime moon and your big brother
[00:58] (Flashback) go
    are always watching over you.
[01:01] (Flashback) yu
    I understand, Big bro!
SIGN    Brotherly Love
[02:43] at
    What?
[02:44] at
    Reading to kindergarteners?
[02:46] yu
    Yeah!
[02:47] yu
    With the student council studying abroad,
[02:49] yu
    the teachers asked the Defense
    Club to do it instead!
[02:52] en
    Huh?
[02:53] en
    Our seats...
[02:55] ryu
    Someone's in our usual spot.
[02:57] io
    Who cares if someone else sits there?
[02:59] en
    You know the saying. Home
    is where the heart is.
[03:02] en
    Anyway, what's going on?
[03:03] en
    Who are they?
[03:04] at
    I heard we got some exchange
    students recently.
[03:07] at
    Maybe it's them?
[03:08] en
    Huh?
[03:09] en
    So what about the crowd?
SIGN    Beppu Brothers
SIGN    Overwhelming support from
     young female fans!!
    And male fans too?!
SIGN    Examining the Hot and Handsome
     Beppu Brother Idols!
    Digging into this mysterious
     duo's personal lives......
SIGN    Beppu Haruhiko
    Birthday: August 21st
    Leo Blood Tpe AB
    Interests: Bonsai
    Favorite food: Rice balls
    Hated food: Carrots
SIGN    Beppu Akihiko:
    Birthday: August 21st
    Leo Blood Type AB
    Hobby: Calligraphy
    Favorite food: Rice balls
    Hated food: Green peppers
[03:11] io
    The detective I hired says
    they're the Beppu twins.
[03:16] io
    Very handsome, excellent grades.
[03:18] io
    They earned the title "eternal pretty boys"
[03:20] io
    in the Pretty Boy Contest the other day.
[03:23] io
    And they already have a follower
    clique known as the "Beppu Apes."
[03:28] en
    Yeah, let's sit somewhere else.
[03:33] en
    So, Yumoto. What was that about
    reading to kindergarteners?
[03:36] yu
    You'll do it, En-chan-senpai?!
[03:39] en
    No, I don't think I could
    handle reading to little kids.
[03:43] at
    It sounds like a nice idea, but...
[03:45] ryu
    It would be one thing if it were a
    co-ed event with a girls' high school.
[03:48] io
    I never volunteer my services
    without compensation.
[03:52] wom
    I believe that activities that spread love
[03:54] wom
    are something the Defense Club
    should always take part in!
[03:56] kat
    Why?!
[03:57] kat
    Why do you hesitate?
[03:59] kat
    Why?
[04:00] kat
    Why were you chosen?!
[04:03] kat
    To be a child development volunteer...
[04:05] kat
    Those shining smiles of local children...
[04:08] aya
    Why?
[04:09] aya
    Why is it not me?!
[04:12] en
    I think there's a crazy in our midst.
[04:14] at
    Um...
[04:15] at
    You're Katari-kun, right?
[04:17] at
    From the Speaking Poets Society...
[04:19] kat
    Yes.
[04:20] kat
    I am Katari Tagaru.
SIGN    Katari Tagaru
[04:22] kat
    Representative of the Binan High School
    association, the Speaking Poets Society.
[04:25] kat
    Because! To enjoy something is to speak
    of it. In other words, to recite.
[04:30] kat
    Humans are speaking mammals.
[04:31] kat
    I am the world's mouthpiece!
[04:34] ryu
    Yeah, he's a crazy.
[04:36] io
    He called himself a representative,
[04:37] io
    but he's the Speaking Poets
    Society's only member.
[04:40] en
    Yeah, I feel my soul crying out to
    me, "Be somewhere else right now."
[04:45] at
    Well, Katari-kun. See you later.
[04:47] yu
    What are you guys doing?
[04:48] yu
    What about reading to the kindergartners?
[04:50] kat
    Nothing!
[04:52] kat
    The art of recitation is beyond them!
[04:54] kat
    Nonsense!
[04:55] kat
    Only I can handle it!
[04:58] haru
    What are you trembling for?
[05:00] haru
    Are you mad?
[05:02] aki
    Stop it, Haru.
[05:04] aki
    I know that angry people are funny,
[05:06] aki
    but if you tease them, they
    might take it out on you.
[05:09] kat
    You two...
[05:10] kat
    You're the Beppu siblings
    everyone's talking about.
[05:12] haru
    Yes.
[05:13] haru
    I am Haruhiko, the younger.
[05:15] aki
    Akihiko, the elder.
[05:17] aki
    Together, we are...
[05:18] haru
    The school's...
[05:19] aki
    ...idols...
[05:20] both
    ...the Beppu Brothers!
[05:22] aki
    Now, why are you...
[05:24] haru
    ...mad at the Defense Club?
[05:26] ka
    Because!
[05:27] ka
    I say "no thank you" to any
    out-loud reading done by them!
[05:30] ka
    Such an act requires expressiveness!
[05:32] ka
    That's something only I can do!
[05:35] haru
    I don't quite get it...
[05:36] aki
    ...but you are very funny!
[05:40] dada
    He seems usable.
[05:42] dada
    This is our chance to crush
    the Defense Club into bit parts.
[05:45] aki
    Crush them into bit parts?
[05:47] both
    Nice one.
[05:49] en
    Seriously, it's not happening.
[05:53] en
    I'm not reciting any folktales
    to kindergartners.
[05:56] ryu
    Yeah, same.
[05:57] ryu
    Reciting pillow talk to
    high school girls, maybe.
[06:00] io
    Sorry to repeat myself,
    but I don't work for free.
[06:03] at
    We've been through this over and over again.
[06:05] yu
    But I really want to do it!
[06:08] wom
    Everyone, the volunteer spirit
    is the very foundation of love!
[06:11] wom
    To give is, itself, love!
    Why won't you do it?!
[06:15] en
    'Cause it's a pain in the neck?
[06:17] at
    But folktales are surprisingly
    trendy, aren't they?
[06:20] at
    I always used to watch that anime,
[06:22] at
    "Folktales From Japan".
[06:25] en
    Well, The Crane's Gift and
    Momotaro and such aside,
[06:29] en
    there's The Crying Red Ogre and
    other obscure classics, I suppose.
[06:33] io
    And the story of The Gold
    Axe and the Silver Axe
[06:36] io
    contains good advice for those
    entering the world of investment.
[06:39] io
    "When a deal sounds too good,
    there's always a catch."
[06:42] ryu
    I think Urashima Taro is my favorite.
[06:45] ryu
    That Otohime, you know?
[06:47] ryu
    I'd go a summer-long romance with her!
[06:50] yu
    I always liked Jizo and the Hats!
[06:53] yu
    My brother and I used to
    play Jizo and the Hats!
[06:55] at
    "Play"?
[06:56] yu
    It's a game we'd play on snowy
    days. We'd weave hats out of sedge.
SIGN    Candy
SIGN    Sweet Dumplings
[06:59] yu
    Then I had to give them to the Jizo statues
    without trading them for snacks in town.
[07:03] en
    That's a game? Really?
[07:05] yu
    My brother used fun games to
    teach me all kinds of things.
[07:10] en
    Really?
[07:11] at
    Gora-san is truly an inscrutible person.
[07:13] yu
    The Jizo and the Hats game...
[07:15] yu
    that really takes me back...
[07:17] yu
    One day when it snowed, I
    was five years old, I think.
[07:21] (Flashback) go
    Listen, Yumoto.
[07:23] (Flashback) go
    I'm heading out for work.
[07:26] (Flashback) go
    I want you to do something
    nice while I'm gone.
[07:30] (Flashback) go
    That's right.
[07:30] (Flashback) go
    Take these hats to the Jizo
    statues outside of town.
[07:35] (Flashback) go
    Don't stray from the path no matter what.
[07:38] (Flashback) go
    Got it?
[07:39] (Flashback) yu
    Yeah, got it!
[07:40] yu
    So I started for the Jizo statues,
    just like my bro told me...
[07:46] yu
    But I ran into a trap!
[07:48] en
    A trap?
[07:49] (Flashback) man
    Hey, boy.
[07:51] (Flashback) man
    You've got some nice-looking hats there.
[07:53] (Flashback) yu
    I'm selling steamed buns here.
[07:55] (Flashback) yu
    Wanna trade?
[07:57] (Flashback) yu
    They look delicious!
[07:58] (Flashback) man
    Well? Want to trade?
[08:00] (Flashback) yu
    Yeah!
[08:02] (Flashback) yu
    Yes! Let's eat...
[08:06] (Flashback) go
    Listen, Yumoto.
[08:08] (Flashback) go
    Don't stray from the path no matter what.
[08:11] (Flashback) yu
    No, I shouldn't.
[08:13] (Flashback) yu
    I can't accept this.
[08:15] (Flashback) yu
    But I'll still give you the hat.
[08:17] (Flashback) yu
    I'm sorry.
[08:18] ryu
    Wait, you gave him the hat?
[08:21] yu
    Yeah.
[08:22] yu
    But I didn't take the steamed bun.
[08:24] io
    So what about the four other hats?
[08:27] yu
    I gave them to the Jizo statues.
[08:30] yu
    But...
[08:32] yu
    There were five Jizo statues,
    and I was missing one hat.
[08:35] yu
    I didn't realize until then that
    that's why Bro gave me five.
SIGN    Oh no! I don't have enough!
[08:41] yu
    So I had to take off my own scarf
    and put it on the Jizo statue.
[08:45] at
    Just like in the story, right?
[08:47] (Flashback) yu
    I'm sorry I don't have a hat for you...
[08:54] (Flashback) go
    Yumoto...
[08:55] (Flashback) go
    You did a very good thing.
[08:57] (Flashback) yu
    Bro...
[09:00] at
    Gora-san came to watch, huh?
[09:02] yu
    Yeah.
[09:03] yu
    Because the snow was falling
    so hard, and he got worried.
[09:07] ryu
    Your brother sounds like a real worrywart.
[09:10] at
    Like a parent watching over a
    kid running their first errand.
[09:12] wom
    Gora-san's brotherly love for
    Yumoto-san is higher than the sky
[09:16] wom
    and deeper than the sea!
[09:19] yu
    Anyway, I want to tell
    little kids those folktales
[09:22] yu
    just like my brother did for me.
[09:25] gora
    Yumoto...
[09:27] at
    So, what should we do?
[09:28] ryu
    If Yumoto wants to do it that badly...
[09:31] io
    It's hard to refuse out of hand.
[09:32] io
    Even if I must work for free.
[09:34] en
    Are you guys seriously leaning
    towards reading to the kids?
[09:41] yu
    Big bro, what's wrong?
[09:42] go
    Yumoto, reading to others is love!
[09:45] go
    Do it right.
[09:52] yu
    Yeah! Bro, I'll do my best!
[09:55] en
    Yeah, we're definitely gonna end
    up reading to the kids, aren't we?
[09:59] at
    Looks like it.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club
    
    Reading Folktales
    
    to Kindergartners
    
    Event Coming Up!
[10:08] kat
    Unbelievable!
[10:09] kat
    How could they go over my head
    and give it to the Defense Club?!
[10:12] kat
    Illegal!
[10:14] kat
    All recitation opportunities
    should fall to me!
[10:17] haru
    Look at that jealousy.
[10:19] aki
    It's truly petty.
[10:21] haru
    But those flames of petty jealousy
[10:23] haru
    that others can't understand...
[10:26] aki
    ...can soon become raging infernos.
[10:28] dada
    If we want to crush the Defense Club,
[10:30] dada
    using Katari Tagaru is the best way.
[10:34] haru
    The Defense Club...
[10:36] both
    I don't like them.
[10:37] dada
    Let's take 'em out.
SIGN    The Flashing Prince Battle Lover Cerulean Finishing Move: Cerulean Love Aqua
[10:47] kat
    What?
[10:49] kat
    Just what are they planning to
    read to those kindergartners?
[10:53] kat
    When...
[10:54] kat
    The moment any one of
    them flubs even slightly,
[10:56] kat
    I shall mercilessly hijack their performance!
[11:00] yu
    I really think I want to do the story
    of Jizo and the Hats for the kids.
[11:05] yu
    What do you think?
[11:07] ryu
    It doesn't really matter to me.
[11:09] io
    I also have no objection, aside
    from the lack of compensation.
[11:13] yu
    This reminded me.
[11:15] yu
    It's because my brother read
    folktales to me every night
[11:18] yu
    that I never felt lonely as a child.
[11:22] at
    Your parents have been gone that long?
[11:25] yu
    Yeah! Bro says they're busy
    with their hot springs tour.
[11:31] en
    That seems a bit suspect.
[11:32] at
    Well, I guess everyone
    has their circumstances.
[11:35] io
    Does that mean Gora-san's been
    your caretaker in every respect?
[11:40] yu
    Yeah!
[11:41] yu
    From feeding me to brushing my
    teeth, my brother did it all!
[11:45] yu
    My brother's lap was so warm...
[11:50] yu
    What is this feeling?
[11:52] at
    It tugs at the heart strings, huh?
[11:54] wom
    Because Gora-san looked after him even
    when he was still in high school himself!
[11:59] io
    I brushed my own teeth, at least.
[12:02] io
    Even as a child.
[12:03] en
    Hey, didn't we forbid you from
    talking about tooth-brushing?
[12:07] at
    En-chan, there's no need to
    air out that old laundry.
[12:16] kat
    Jesus!
[12:18] kat
    The Defense Club has come
    together for the reading!
SIGN    Jizo and the Hats
[12:22] kat
    Nonsense!
[12:24] kat
    Such work was meant for me!
[12:27] dada
    His flame of jealousy is
    burning even brighter.
[12:35] gora
    You can't wage war on an empty stomach.
[12:37] gora
    Eat, Yumoto, along with your comrades!
[12:39] yu
    Thanks, Bro!
[12:42] yu
    They're delicious, Bro!
[12:44] yu
    But we're reading to kids.
    We're not waging war.
[12:48] go
    Life is an ongoing battle to
    convey one's love to others.
[12:51] go
    Reading aloud to children
[12:54] go
    is a battle to make those
    children feel loved.
[12:57] yu
    Got it, Bro!
[12:59] haru
    Look at him!
[13:00] haru
    Does he really think he's
    worthy to eat those riceballs?
[13:03] aki
    Look at him, stuffing his face
    without a care in the world...
[13:06] aki
    It's unforgivable.
[13:09] dada
    Flames of jealousy allow
    Galaxy Idols The VEPPer
[13:12] dada
    to shine ever brighter.
[13:18] kat
    Jizo and the Hats is about a
    poor yet kind elderly couple
[13:22] kat
    who find Jizo statues on the
    roadside covered in snow,
[13:25] kat
    and give them the sedge hats they made to
    sell for money to them, expecting no reward.
[13:29] kat
    Then, later,
[13:30] kat
    the Jizo statues come to return
    the favor in heartwarming fashion.
[13:34] kat
    Difficult!
[13:36] kat
    There's no way the Defense
    Club could handle it!
[13:38] kid
    That guy's creepy!
[13:40] kid
    Shh! He's probably a crazy!
[13:42] kid
    Hey, it's starting!
[13:45] en
    So why are we the Jizo statues?
[13:48] at
    Is now the time?
[13:49] io
    We ended up doing it as a performance.
[13:53] io
    I don't like to admit it,
[13:55] io
    but I invested a lot of my
    personal funds into this set.
[13:59] yu
    Wow!
[14:00] yu
    Cool!
[14:01] yu
    It really looks just like
    the world of a folktale!
[14:06] gora
    Yumoto...
[14:08] both
    I don't like it.
[14:12] yu
    Oh! I have failed to sell
    my hats once again today!
[14:14] kat
    Not great!
[14:16] kat
    What a stiff reading!
[14:18] gora
    Excellent job, Yumoto.
[14:19] gora
    You're doing perfectly.
[14:21] yu
    How awful!
[14:23] yu
    These Jizo statues are covered in snow!
[14:26] yu
    I have got to help them!
[14:32] yu
    I am lacking one hat!
[14:34] yu
    What am I to do?
[14:36] yu
    I know!
[14:41] yu
    So cold!
[14:43] kid
    I like that old man!
[14:44] kid
    But I think the Jizo is choking...
[14:46] gora
    Yumoto.
[14:48] gora
    Your big brother will warm you up later!
[14:50] kat
    Why?!
[14:51] kat
    Why are they laughing?!
[14:53] kat
    This is supposed to be a moving scene!
[15:02] dada
    Welcome to the VEPP Theater.
[15:06] both
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[15:13] both
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[15:16] both
    On the name of the stars!
[15:35] both
    The twin stars shining in the heaven!
[15:37] haru
    Salty Sol!
[15:38] aki
    Melty Luna!
[15:41] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[15:45] both
    Chosen warrior!
[15:47] haru
    Lucky you!
[15:49] aki
    Happy you!
[15:52] both
    Shooting...
[15:53] both
    Star!
[16:02] mic
    I will recite... the folktale!
[16:05] mic
    Because...
[16:06] mic
    I want to move the children's souls!
[16:08] mic
    Yes, the one who loves recitation,
[16:13] mic
    and longs to recite...
[16:14] mic
    Mic Monster!
[16:17] wom
    E-E-Everyone!
[16:18] wom
    A suspicious intruder! Well,
    I'm in no position to judge...
[16:22] en
    Seriously?
[16:23] at
    At a time like this?
[16:24] yu
    Why, you...
[16:26] yu
    the kids were feeling
    really moved by the story!
[16:29] yu
    I want to inspire those kids
    the way my brother inspired me!
[16:34] gora
    Yumoto...
[16:35] gora
    You've grown up so much...
[16:37] wom
    Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[16:43] yu
    Love Making!
[16:49] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[16:51] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[16:54] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[16:56] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[16:58] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[17:00] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[17:04] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[17:06] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:08] ryu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[17:10] ryu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[17:17] en
    This love-filled planet will
    not abide those who lack love!
[17:21] ryu
    Those who wield loveless
    power must kneel before love!
[17:25] io
    Love is power!
[17:26] io
    Love is hope!
[17:28] atsu
    Be born for love!
[17:29] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[17:31] yu
    Love!
[17:32] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[17:36] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:37] yu
    Feel the power...
[17:39] five
    Of love!
[17:42] mic
    I'm the prince of microphones, Mic Monster!
[17:45] mic
    Listen! I'll let you hear a true recitation!
[17:48] mic
    Ladies and gentlemen, watch as I bring
    a moving end to this performance!
[17:51] kid
    Is it a hero show now?
[17:53] kid
    The blur-faces are funny!
[17:54] mic
    Once... upon a time...
    off... in the mountains...
[17:55] yu
    Hey, you!
[17:56] yu
    If you want to move someone, the skill
    of the performance doesn't matter!
[18:00] yu
    As long as you're giving it everything
    you have, the feeling will get through!
[18:02] mic
    Silence, amateur!
[18:04] mic
    I'll show you the power of a true reciter!
[18:11] mic
    Take this! Cry of my soul!
SIGN    Soul Cry
[18:16] en
    "Soul" hurts!
[18:18] at
    Yeah, the kanji does have a lot of strokes!
[18:19] ryu
    "Cry" hurts a lot, too!
[18:22] mic
    Do you see now?
[18:24] mic
    My attacks are cries from my soul!
[18:26] mic
    My words take form and become weapons!
[18:30] en
    I don't get it!
[18:32] at
    Just watch out for flying kanji!
[18:34] mic
    Next up... all of my resentment!
SIGN    Resentment
[18:39] en
    "Resentment" hurts, too!
[18:41] yu
    And it's heavy, as well!
[18:45] io
    My set!
[18:47] io
    I spent a lot of money on that...
[18:51] ryu
    And I threw away my pride to play a Jizo!
[18:53] ryu
    Don't get in our way!
[18:55] mic
    Shut up!
[18:57] mic
    I have a dream!
[18:58] mic
    A dream to make others
    weep at my performance...
SIGN    Dream
[19:06] mic
    Come true, my dream!
[19:12] en
    "Dream" hurts, too!
[19:14] atsu
    And he's pretty annoying.
[19:16] kid
    That monster is scary!
[19:16] kid
    Keep fighting, blurry guys!
[19:19] gora
    Rise again, Yumoto!
[19:21] yu
    You...
[19:22] yu
    For whose sake do you speak?!
[19:25] mic
    What?!
[19:26] yu
    Love is something you give to others!
[19:28] yu
    That's what my brother taught me!
[19:31] go
    That's right, Yumoto...
[19:32] go
    Give, and it shall be given to you!
[19:35] go
    To give is true love!
[19:37] yu
    My brother's folktales probably
    weren't read all that well!
[19:41] yu
    But they always moved me!
[19:43] yu
    Because even though he was
    probably exhausted and sleepy,
[19:46] yu
    he'd tell them just for me!
[19:48] yu
    Because my brother's stories
    were full of his love!
[19:52] (Flashback) go
    Yumoto.
[19:53] (Flashback) go
    Sweet dreams.
[19:55] yu
    What's important isn't the
    skill of the performance!
[19:58] yu
    It's the love!
[19:58] both
    Love!
[20:01] yu
    Let's go! Scarlet Love Lumiere!
SIGN    Love
[20:08] mon
    Love is here!
[20:10] yu
    Now!
[20:12] yu
    Hit him with our love!
[20:15] yu
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[20:19] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[20:22] at
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[20:26] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[20:29] ryu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[20:44] yu
    True Love Attack!
[20:57] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[21:14] yu
    Love is over!
[21:15] kids
    Yeah!
[21:35] ryu
    These are great!
[21:36] en
    Tastes like mom's home cooking, huh?
[21:38] at
    Yeah.
[21:42] yu
    Bro,
[21:43] yu
    this reminded me.
[21:46] yu
    Even though you were
    always so busy with work,
[21:49] yu
    you'd say that you were always watching me.
[21:52] yu
    That you were watching out
    for me, day and night,
[21:55] yu
    like the moon in the daytime sky.
[21:59] go
    Yeah.
[22:02] go
    You've grown, Yumoto.
SIGN    Curse
[22:17] haru
    Hakone Yumoto. He's truly in our way.
[22:20] aki
    Yes. The Defense Club has to go.
[22:23] dada
    Don't be so impatient, my twins.
[22:25] dada
    The curtain of battle has only just gone up.
[24:01] at
    Next time: The Synchronicity of Love.
SIGN    Next time
SIGN    The Synchronicity of Love
[24:04] at
    Love making!
[24:05] ---
    

Season 2

4 - The Synchronicity of Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] dada
    --
[00:00] aki
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] io
    --
[00:11] all
    Haru-sama!
[00:12] all
    Aki-sama!
[00:14] all
    Haru-sama!
[00:15] haru
    They're so annoying.
[00:15] all
    Aki-sama!
[00:16] aki
    They're becoming a
    neighborhood nuisance, too.
[00:20] yu
    Nice to see you guys again today!
[00:21] yu
    Please take one of these!
[00:23] yu
    They're coupons for our bath!
[00:24] kid
    Thanks!
[00:25] kid
    Thanks a bunch!
[00:27] go
    Great job, Yumoto.
[00:29] go
    That's very considerate of you.
[00:33] haru
    It's him!
[00:35] aki
    Haru, I know what you're thinking.
[00:38] haru
    Aki, you feel the same way?
[00:40] aki
    Yes...
[00:42] both
    We are not amused.
[00:44] dada
    So why not just get rid of him?
SIGN    The Synchronicity of Love
[02:28] yu
    Oh yeah, senpai!
[02:30] yu
    You hear this a lot at barbers
    and beauty shops and stuff.
[02:33] yu
    "Do you feel itchy anywhere?"
[02:36] en
    I guess you still do hear that.
[02:38] atsu
    Yeah, that's a line you only
    hear at places like that.
[02:43] yu
    But I hear twins know that
    kind of thing without asking!
[02:47] yu
    If their twin is feeling itchy or something.
[02:49] ryu
    Seriously?
[02:50] yu
    Seriously!
[02:51] ryu
    Which means they can seriously
    scratch anywhere they feel itchy?
[02:53] yu
    They seriously can!
[02:54] yu
    Twins are amazing, huh?
[02:56] yu
    They know just where the other feels itchy!
[02:59] en
    Hey Atsushi, why are we talking about twins?
[03:04] atsu
    It's probably because of those Italian twins
[03:07] atsu
    transferring here right on the
    heels of the Beppu Siblings.
[03:10] en
    Another set of twins?
[03:12] en
    And why are they Italian?
[03:14] atsu
    That's a very good question.
[03:17] yu
    They're the Salvatores,
    and they're really rugged.
[03:20] io
    When you say "rugged," you
    mean their facial features?
[03:22] ryu
    What else could he mean?
[03:24] io
    Well, lots of other things...
[03:27] en
    Like sideburns or chest hair, or something.
[03:29] ai
    Yeah, I bet they've got that.
[03:32] en
    They say someone rich in
    hair is also rich in spirit.
[03:35] en
    Is that true?
[03:37] atsu
    I don't know.
[03:38] atsu
    I think it's an old wives tale?
[03:40] yu
    Rich in hair means rich in spirit?
[03:43] yu
    I guess that's why Gora is like that!
[03:46] en
    Gora is hairy?
[03:48] atsu
    He doesn't give off that vibe...
[03:51] yu
    Well, he's hairier than me!
[03:52] ryu
    That's just because you're smooth all over.
[03:56] ryu
    But yeah, I've heard that, too.
[03:58] ryu
    The rich in hair and spirit thing.
[04:00] io
    I've heard that, too.
[04:02] io
    Though I expelled it from my mind, as
    there was no profit to be gained from it.
[04:06] yu
    That's right!
[04:07] yu
    Wom-san is hairy, too!
[04:09] yu
    I guess that's why you're so compassionate!
[04:11] wom
    Please, desist!
[04:13] wom
    I don't itch anywhere!
[04:14] yu
    No, I bet you're itchy right here!
[04:22] haru
    I'm extremely unamused.
[04:24] haru
    I want Hakone Yumoto extremely gone.
[04:27] aki
    Haru, I know what you're thinking.
SIGN    Monster
[04:31] aki
    You want to create a monster
    to stamp him out, right?
[04:34] haru
    Yes, yes! That, that!
[04:37] dada
    In that case...
[04:39] dada
    Let's make one.
[04:45] yu
    Today's a minced chicken and egg lunch! Yeah!
[04:48] tsu
    Gora-san's handmade lunches always
    look delicious, don't they?
[04:51] yu
    They're the best!
[04:52] yu
    I usually eat rice balls, so once in a while,
[04:54] yu
    he goes out of his way
    to pack a lunch for me.
[04:58] yu
    Let's eat!
[05:00] yu
    Huh? There's no spoon...
[05:05] yu
    You want a bite of my chicken and egg lunch?
[05:10] haru
    I want it...
[05:12] haru
    I want it so bad!
[05:16] aki
    No, thank you.
[05:17] haru
    That lunch wasn't made for us.
[05:24] aki
    This is why I didn't want to
    have lunch at the cafeteria.
[05:28] haru
    But going out of my way to avoid
    him gets under my skin, too.
[05:32] aki
    I can't say I don't sympathise...
[05:35] haru
    Right?
[05:36] haru
    I hate them!
[05:38] ber
    Loves me...
[05:39] ber
    hates me...
[05:40] ber
    loves me...
[05:40] dada
    It appears someone's here.
[05:42] ber
    hates me...
[05:43] ber
    loves me...
[05:45] ber
    hates me...
[05:48] haru
    You. What are you doing?
[05:52] ber
    I do beg your pardon!
[05:54] ber
    I was performing, how do you say,
    the Japanese flower fortunetelling!
[05:58] aki
    Picking flowers in a greenhouse
    seems rather tasteless...
[06:01] ber
    I beg your utmost pardon!
[06:04] ber
    I was worried about whether my twin
    younger brother loves or hates me.
[06:09] ber
    And before I could think twice, I
    began plucking the flower's petals.
[06:11] aki
    Your twin younger brother?
[06:13] haru
    You're twins, too?
[06:15] ber
    Yes!
[06:16] ber
    My name is Bernardo.
[06:18] ber
    My little brother is Alan.
[06:20] ber
    We are the pretty-boy Italian twins,
[06:22] ber
    acknowledged by both ourselves and others!
[06:28] aki
    If you're twins,
[06:30] aki
    can't you just tell what he's thinking?
[06:32] haru
    We never run into that problem.
[06:36] ber
    I am so full of envy!
[06:38] ber
    We were not always this way!
[06:41] haru
    What a waste.
[06:43] haru
    Twins, of all people,
    should always get along.
[06:45] ber
    Indeed!
[06:46] ber
    Twins must always get along!
[06:50] ber
    And yet I cannot understand
    anything my brother is thinking!
[06:55] haru
    How did that happen?
[06:58] aki
    You did something to make
    him hate you, right?
[07:00] ber
    It cannot be!
[07:02] ber
    How can my brother hate me,
    when I love him so?
[07:05] aki
    But your brother must have some reason.
[07:08] haru
    That's right.
[07:10] haru
    Because without a reason...
[07:11] both
    Twins would never, ever hate each other!
[07:14] aki
    Even if the world turned upside-down...
[07:17] haru
    We'd still be of one mind in all things.
[07:20] ber
    What lovely twinly love!
[07:22] ber
    That is what I would like to have!
[07:25] ber
    And yet Alan...
[07:27] ber
    he will not even meet my gaze!
[07:34] dada
    And so, Bernardo told his story.
[07:38] dada
    They actually used to be the best of friends.
[07:43] dada
    But when they hit puberty,
[07:46] dada
    the little brother changed.
[07:49] (Flashback) alan
    Brother, I will no longer
    take baths with you!
[07:52] (Flashback) ber
    Why not, Alan?
[07:54] (Flashback) ber
    Brother...
[07:55] (Flashback) ber
    you cannot understand how I feel!
[07:58] ber
    Since then,
[08:00] ber
    we have never once bathed together.
[08:04] haru
    I wonder why not.
[08:05] ber
    I cannot understand!
[08:07] haru
    It's a mystery, then?
[08:09] aki
    Yeah.
[08:10] aki
    It's hard for perfect twins
    like us to understand.
[08:13] dada
    But these estranged twins could be useful.
[08:16] aki
    Good point.
[08:18] ber
    I beg of you to help me!
[08:21] dada
    And so we quickly began trailing
    the younger brother, Alan.
[08:26] dada
    There's Alan!
[08:28] haru
    He does look a lot like Bernardo.
SIGN    Alan Salvatore
[08:30] aki
    They're as identical as we are.
[08:33] yu
    Alan!
[08:35] yu
    I heard they have hot springs in Italy, too!
[08:40] yu
    My brother says they're called thermae!
[08:44] alan
    And what of it?
[08:46] yu
    The truth is, we run a thermae too!
[08:49] yu
    You can come by with your
    twin brother some time!
[08:52] yu
    Here, a coupon!
[08:55] alan
    The answer is no!
[08:57] alan
    I will never go to a thermae with my brother!
[08:59] alan
    Never!
[09:00] yu
    What's wrong?
[09:03] dada
    Hakone Yumoto appears to
    have stepped on a landmine.
[09:07] aki
    Yes.
[09:08] aki
    It appears that what Bernardo said was true.
[09:14] [Messenger] sign
    The Piercing Prince
    Battle Lover Epinard
    Finishing Move: Epinard Love Hurricane
[09:19] aki
    Could we have a word?
[09:22] alan
    What is it?
[09:24] haru
    We are the Beppu siblings.
[09:26] aki
    We're twins, like you.
[09:28] alan
    So what?
[09:30] haru
    Why do you hate your brother?
[09:32] alan
    H-How did you know...
[09:34] haru
    Bernardo told us.
[09:37] aki
    He's worried about you.
[09:39] alan
    My brother could never
    understand my feelings.
[09:42] alan
    And neither would perfect
    twins such as yourselves!
[09:45] aki
    Well, I agree that we're perfect...
[09:48] alan
    But we are entirely different!
[09:51] alan
    There is a wall between my brother and I
[09:53] alan
    that none could ever surmount!
[09:57] aki
    We're sorry to pry,
[09:59] aki
    but could you tell us why it
    is that you hate your brother?
[10:04] haru
    As fellow twins, perhaps we could help.
[10:07] alan
    I do not wish to say it.
[10:08] alan
    It is too shameful a
    thing for an Italian boy!
[10:13] haru
    For an Italian boy?
[10:15] aki
    What does that mean?
[10:17] alan
    Do not poke at my inferiority complex!
[10:20] haru
    Oh?
[10:21] haru
    But I'm sure we'd be able to help.
[10:24] aki
    We're very helpful to people with complexes.
[10:27] haru
    Yes, we always side with people
    going through hard times.
[10:31] haru
    In other words...
[10:33] both
    We're on your side!
[10:36] alan
    You are the first people who
    have ever said such a thing.
[10:41] alan
    My brother is a good man,
    and very considerate.
[10:44] alan
    But my brother has something which I lack.
[10:48] aki
    I see.
[10:49] haru
    That would cause an inferiority complex.
[10:51] aki
    Then why don't you just take it from him?
[10:56] alan
    But such a thing cannot be stolen...
[10:58] haru
    It can.
[10:59] aki
    If you let us help you, at least.
[11:01] alan
    Truly?
[11:03] aki
    Truly!
[11:04] haru
    So, what is it...
[11:05] aki
    ...that you want?
[11:08] alan
    Chest hair.
[11:10] haru
    Huh?
[11:11] aki
    Chest hair?
[11:13] aki
    But yes, we'll find a way to help you.
[11:16] alan
    Truly?
[11:17] aki
    Yes.
[11:18] aki
    If you hate your brother, from the bottom
    of your heart, for his chest hair.
[11:23] alan
    Yes, I hate it.
[11:25] alan
    He has such a fine chest full of hair!
[11:27] alan
    I envy him, and at the same time, hate him!
[11:30] aki
    Then...
[11:30] haru
    ...we'll grant your wish.
[11:42] dada
    * Welcome to the VEPP Theater.*
[11:44] alan
    What?!
[11:47] alan
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[11:53] alan
    Moon and sun, miracles and secrets
[11:57] alan
    We're the stars making wishes come true!
[12:00] alan
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[12:02] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[12:06] both
    Chosen warrior!
[12:06] alan
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[12:08] haru
    Lucky you!
[12:10] aki
    Happy you!
[12:10] alan
    On the name of the stars!
[12:12] both
    Shooting...
[12:13] both
    Star!
[12:22] aki
    Now we set him on Hakone Yumoto,
    and let him tear him to pieces.
[12:25] haru
    Hair him to pieces, you mean.
[12:30] both
    Suffer! Feel the pain!
[12:36] yu
    The True Lovracelets!
[12:37] wom
    Everyone, let's Love Making!
[12:42] yu
    Love Making!
[13:09] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[13:12] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[13:15] en
    Love Making.
[13:26] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[13:27] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[13:30] atsu
    Love Making.
[13:40] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[13:42] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[13:45] io
    Love Making.
[13:55] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[13:57] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[13:59] ryu
    Love Making!
[14:10] ryu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[14:11] ryu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[14:25] en
    This love-filled planet
[14:27] en
    will not abide those who lack love!
[14:29] ryu
    Those who wield loveless power
[14:31] ryu
    must kneel before love!
[14:33] io
    Love is power!
[14:34] io
    Love is hope!
[14:36] atsu
    Be born for love!
[14:37] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[14:39] yu
    Love!
[14:40] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[14:43] five
    Battle Lovers!
[14:45] yu
    Feel the power...
[14:47] five
    of love!
[14:50] hair
    Behold my luxurious chest hair!
[14:52] hair
    I am Chest Hair Monster Alan!
[14:55] hair
    You are the ones who will feel the power!
[14:58] en
    He said his real name.
[15:00] atsu
    Yes, he did.
[15:01] en
    But what did he say?
[15:03] en
    That's chest hair?
[15:04] atsu
    If he says it is, I guess it is.
[15:07] en
    Overdoing it, isn't he?
[15:08] ryu
    Over-overdoing it.
[15:10] io
    Overdoing it so badly, you couldn't pay me ten
    million yen to look straight at it.
[15:14] yu
    You! How did you become a monster?
[15:17] yu
    Who did this to you?
[15:18] mon
    That does not matter!
[15:20] mon
    I will defeat you to vent my complex
[15:24] mon
    over my brother's chest hair!
[15:26] en
    He just stated his motivation
    in the clearest terms possible.
[15:29] atsu
    Though it's still incomprehensible.
[15:31] en
    I don't even care if someone
    has chest hair or not.
[15:36] ryu
    Clean-shaven is more the fashion
    nowadays anyway, right?
[15:39] io
    Yeah. I can't understand it.
[15:41] alan
    You could never understand!
[15:45] yu
    I kind of do!
[15:47] alan
    What?!
[15:48] en
    Seriously?
[15:49] atsu
    He understands?
[15:50] yu
    Yeah!
[15:51] yu
    Because my brother Gora is hairy and manly,
[15:55] yu
    and I'm a little jealous of that!
[15:58] haru
    Is Gora-san hairier than he looks?
[16:02] haru
    He is very manly, after all.
[16:04] aki
    I never knew!
[16:06] haru
    I really can't stand Hakone Yumoto.
[16:09] haru
    How dare he know everything about Gora-san!
[16:11] aki
    Get him, Chest Hair Monster!
[16:13] dada
    Attack!
[16:15] alan
    Take this! Hairball Beam!
[16:20] yu
    What?!
[16:21] en
    Oh, boy... are you kidding me?
[16:23] atsu
    This is really something...
[16:24] ryu
    What's going on?!
[16:25] io
    Please don't look!
[16:27] yu
    This is all extremely embarrassing!
[16:30] mon
    Behold, the power of the Hairball Beam!
[16:34] haru
    How funny!
[16:35] aki
    A plan to weaken the enemy
    through embarrassment?
[16:40] mon
    Next, I will give you fantastic chest hair!
[16:45] mon
    Chained Chest Hair Beam!
[16:48] atsu
    Chained? What?
[16:50] atsu
    I don't understand.
[16:57] en
    Oh, is that what "chained" means?
[17:00] atsu
    I don't think this is the
    best time to be impressed.
[17:03] mon
    Are you not happy to have
    such wonderful chest hair?
[17:06] ryu
    No, not at all!
[17:08] atsu
    What do we do about this, anyway?
[17:10] yu
    Is doing this really making you happy?
[17:12] mon
    What?!
[17:14] yu
    I'm asking!
[17:16] yu
    Is having that fake chest hair,
    giving us fake chest hair...
[17:18] yu
    Does that really make you happy?
[17:22] mon
    Of course it does!
[17:23] mon
    Chest hair is everything!
[17:24] mon
    Chest hair is what makes you an Italian boy!
[17:26] mon
    Bravo, chest hair!
[17:29] mon
    So, what do we do about this?
[17:31] atsu
    This monster's a real pain.
[17:33] ryu
    When they start getting annoying,
    don't we usually just purge them?
[17:36] io
    We wave our little sticks and end it!
[17:39] wom
    You guys are really raring to go for once!
[17:42] yu
    No!
[17:44] en
    Um... why not, exactly?
[17:46] yu
    Even if we beat him,
[17:48] yu
    it won't cure him of his
    complex about his big brother!
[17:51] yu
    We need to get them to make up!
[17:54] en
    I can't entirely deny the logic there...
[17:56] atsu
    In other words...
[17:58] yu
    Wom-san, find his big brother!
[18:01] wom
    Roger that!
[18:03] ryu
    So do we just stay like this until then?
[18:05] io
    It appears that we do.
[18:09] mon
    You make a grand sight
    with all that chest hair!
[18:15] wom
    Everyone!
[18:16] wom
    Here is the monster's brother, Bernardo-san!
[18:19] en
    That was fast.
[18:20] ryu
    Too fast!
[18:22] yu
    That's our Wom-san!
[18:24] ber
    Alan... is that you, Alan?!
[18:26] al
    Yes it is, brother!
[18:28] al
    But I am no longer the Alan you once knew!
[18:31] al
    Look at this magnificent
    chest hair that I have now!
[18:35] ryu
    I cannot even comprehend why he wants that.
[18:38] io
    I'm even more baffled than when
    one of my investments failed.
[18:42] yu
    Bernardo!
[18:43] yu
    You're the only one who can save him!
[18:46] yu
    You're his big brother!
[18:48] ber
    Alan...
[18:50] ber
    I had no idea that my chest hair
    was causing you so much pain!
[18:54] mon
    It is just as I said!
[18:55] mon
    You could not understand how I feel!
[18:58] mon
    We were twins, with the
    same face, the same body,
[19:01] mon
    always with the same thoughts
    and the same dreams!
[19:05] mon
    So why am I the only one
    deprived of chest hair?!
[19:10] ber
    Is that why you
[19:11] ber
    would no longer go to the thermae with me?
[19:14] mon
    That is right!
[19:16] mon
    Your chest hair was so
    dazzling and so enviable,
[19:18] mon
    I could no longer stand to see it!
[19:22] ber
    Then...
[19:23] ber
    I no longer need chest hair!
[19:25] mon
    What?!
[19:26] ber
    I say that if I must lose one of you...
[19:28] ber
    I would rather lose the chest hair!
[19:31] mon
    You lie!
[19:32] mon
    I know that you secretly take
    great pride in your chest hair!
[19:34] ber
    It is no lie!
[19:36] ber
    I shall prove it to you now!
[19:41] ber
    This pain is nothing!
[19:45] en
    This took a turn for the amazing.
[19:47] at
    That's got to sting a little.
[19:49] ryu
    No, it's probably extremely painful.
[19:52] yu
    But he's enduring it!
[19:54] yu
    Because he wants to make up with his
    little brother, even if it hurts!
[19:58] en
    This is bringing tears to your eyes?
[20:00] haru
    Damn that Hakone Yumoto.
[20:02] haru
    He got in our way!
[20:04] aki
    That wolf in sheep's clothing...
[20:06] yu
    You!
[20:07] yu
    Do you see the pain your brother's in?
[20:10] yu
    But he's enduring it
[20:12] yu
    because he loves you so much!
[20:15] yu
    He wants to make amends
[20:17] yu
    and restore your loving sibling relationship!
[20:20] ber
    That is right!
[20:21] ber
    To get that back,
[20:22] ber
    I would sacrifice many
    hundreds of chest hairs!
[20:25] mon
    Please, stop it!
[20:27] mon
    I... It is my fault!
[20:30] mon
    Please stop, my brother!
[20:33] en
    They made up?
[20:34] at
    But we're still stuck here?
[20:37] io
    I guess we actually have to purge him.
[20:40] wom
    Okay then, everyone! Now!
[20:42] yu
    Yeah!
[20:44] yu
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[20:49] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[20:52] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[20:55] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[20:59] ryu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[21:06] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[21:23] yu
    Love is over!
[21:27] alan
    Brother!
[21:32] yu
    Thank goodness!
[21:33] go
    Hey! Yumoto!
[21:37] yu
    Brother!
[21:38] yu
    What's wrong?
[21:40] go
    I forgot to include the
    spoon for your lunch today.
[21:44] yu
    Brother!
[21:44] yu
    Thank you! But I already finished it.
[21:47] go
    I see.
[21:48] go
    Well done.
[21:50] aki
    I know what you're thinking.
[21:53] haru
    Yeah.
[21:54] dada
    Don't worry.
[21:56] dada
    You, the Beppu siblings, are the strongest.
[22:00] both
    Yeah.
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[22:05] yu
    Huh?
[22:06] yu
    Bernardo's chest hair is back to normal!
[22:09] wom
    It must be the power of the Love Fountain!
[22:12] en
    Can it do that?
[22:14] at
    I guess it can.
[22:16] al
    That's my dear big brother!
[22:18] ber
    Alan...
[22:20] yu
    I'm so glad you're friends again!
[22:23] io
    I'm not going to say another word on this.
SIGN    Accept Love
SIGN    Next Time
[24:01] io
    Next time, "Accept Love!"
[24:04] io
    Love Making!
[24:07] ---
    

Season 2

5 - Receive Love!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] shi
    --
[00:00] both
    --
[00:00] aki
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
SIGN    Oka Shuzo
[00:22] shi
    What's wrong, Shuzo?!
[00:24] shi
    Don't shy away from my balls!
[00:27] shu
    President Munakata...
[00:28] shu
    I can't take anymore.
[00:30] shi
    How many times must I tell you?
[00:32] shi
    The moment you give up
    is the moment it's over!
[00:35] shu
    Then...
[00:36] shu
    I think it might be over.
[00:38] shi
    I see.
[00:40] shi
    It's over, is it?
[00:42] shi
    Then... we are over, too.
[00:49] shu
    Y-You're horrible!
[00:52] shi
    Can't anyone handle my balls at full power?
[00:59] shi
    Attack!
[01:04] en
    A falling leaf, huh?
[01:06] atsu
    More accurately, a dead leaf.
[01:07] ryu
    Huh?
[01:08] ryu
    Aren't they called autumn leaves?
[01:09] io
    No, it's fall foliage.
[01:11] yu
    I guess a lot of things come
    falling in autumn, huh?
[01:15] yu
    For instance...
[01:15] shi
    Attack!
[01:21] yu
    Wow!
[01:23] yu
    It really did come falling!
[01:26] shi
    He received my ball...
[01:29] shi
    That's him!
[01:31] shi
    He's the one I've been looking for...
[01:33] shi
    the diamond in the rough!
SIGN    Receive Love!
SIGN    Class 1-A
[03:24] yu
    Excuse me,
[03:26] yu
    but you're in my way.
[03:27] yu
    I'm heading for the bathroom...
[03:29] shi
    It doesn't look like it.
[03:30] yu
    Huh? I'm at my limit, actually.
[03:33] shi
    A man who can keep his cool when
    his bladder's at the brink.
[03:37] shi
    Exceptional mental discipline.
[03:38] shi
    No wonder you could receive my balls.
[03:42] yu
    "My balls"?
[03:44] shi
    I am Muna! Kata!
[03:46] shi
    Shigoki!
[03:47] yu
    Munakata Shigoki?
[03:49] shi
    President of the Binan High
    School volleyball club!
[03:52] yu
    Oh...
[03:52] yu
    Oh, you got a ballet dancer
    as your club advisor by mistake!
[03:56] shi
    We've been working without
    an advisor since then.
[03:59] yu
    Really?
[04:00] yu
    I'm glad to hear it!
[04:01] yu
    Well, I'm off to the bathroom...
[04:03] shi
    First, you must decide.
[04:05] shi
    Will you join my volleyball club, or not?
[04:08] yu
    Me?
[04:09] shi
    If you join, I will let you pass.
[04:12] yu
    Fine.
[04:13] yu
    Since I'm really gonna wet myself...
[04:15] shi
    You mean it?
[04:15] yu
    I mean it!
[04:17] yu
    So please, hurry...
[04:17] shi
    I see!
[04:18] shi
    Then...
[04:19] shi
    I need four more!
[04:20] yu
    I've got it handled!
[04:22] shi
    Good. Go!
[04:25] shi
    I have my team.
[04:26] shi
    It's about to begin...
[04:28] shi
    my burning youth of sweat and tears!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[04:34] en
    Hey, can you spell it?
[04:37] atsu
    Huh? Spell what?
[04:38] en
    Volleyball.
[04:40] atsu
    Yeah, I can spell that.
[04:41] io
    That's middle-school level vocabulary.
[04:44] ryu
    That spelling always tripped me up.
[04:48] en
    What about you, Yumoto?
[04:50] yu
    Huh? What grade do you think I'm in?
[04:53] en
    Then what's the first letter?
[04:55] yu
    It's "bareiball", so B, of course!
[04:58] en
    I knew it.
[04:59] yu
    Huh?
[05:00] yu
    Was I wrong?
[05:01] io
    It's not B. It's V.
[05:03] io
    Incidentally, the proper
    pronunciation is "volleyball."
[05:06] yu
    Huh?
[05:07] yu
    But thinking it started with
    a B hasn't hurt me so far.
[05:11] en
    Well, true enough.
[05:13] ryu
    Oh, I know!
[05:15] ryu
    Is that why it's a V-sign?
[05:20] shi
    What are you all doing here?!
[05:23] shi
    Time for training!
[05:24] shi
    Everyone get together!
[05:25] atsu
    Training?
[05:26] en
    Who are you again?
[05:28] shi
    I'm the president of the volleyball club!
[05:30] shi
    Muna! Kata! Shigoki!
[05:32] yu
    Oh, that's right!
[05:34] yu
    As of today, the Defense Club
    is joining the volleyball club!
[05:37] all
    Huh?
[05:38] yu
    That's weird.
[05:39] yu
    Here we were, talking about volleyball,
[05:41] yu
    and I completely forgot to mention it!
[05:43] en
    You are so...
[05:46] shi
    Anyway, get changed immediately!
[05:48] shi
    Meet me in the gym in thirty seconds!
[05:51] all
    S-Seriously?
[05:57] shi
    Great job, Yumoto!
[05:59] shi
    Receive all my balls!
[06:02] en
    How did we end up in the
    volleyball club again?
[06:05] at
    How did Yumoto needing to
    pee get us into this mess?
[06:09] io
    Darn it...
[06:10] io
    This is an entirely unprofitable venture.
[06:14] ryu
    If only there were some
    girls watching, at least...
[06:16] shi
    Hey, you four!
[06:17] shi
    What are you doing?
[06:19] shi
    You need to receive my balls, too!
[06:21] en
    His balls?
[06:22] io
    I really wish he'd stop saying it
    that way. I'm getting the shivers.
[06:25] at
    The shivers? I wish.
[06:26] at
    He's so on fire he's giving me heatstroke.
[06:29] ryu
    His balls, huh?
[06:31] ryu
    Okay,
[06:32] ryu
    I'm gonna hit the hell out of them!
[06:35] ryu
    Bring it!
[06:37] shi
    Let's go!
[06:38] shi
    See if you can even touch my balls!
[06:44] shi
    What are you doing?
[06:45] shi
    Don't take your eyes off my balls!
[06:47] at
    He wants us to look at his balls.
[06:49] en
    I'd really rather not.
[06:50] io
    Um... can we just go?
[06:53] en
    Yeah...
[06:55] shi
    Quit chatting and get on the court!
[06:58] shi
    All of you, receive my balls together!
[07:07] shi
    Why are you evading?
[07:09] shi
    This isn't dodgeball!
[07:10] shi
    All of you, receive my balls!
[07:12] yu
    Leave this to me!
[07:16] en
    Why is he enjoying this so much?
[07:19] ryu
    Maybe he likes playing with balls?
[07:21] io
    At least say "he likes ball games."
[07:26] yu
    Fight!
[07:27] yu
    Fight!
[07:29] shi
    Gaze at the setting sun!
[07:31] shi
    All of you, race for the setting sun!
[07:33] en
    Sunset on an embankment?
[07:35] at
    The situation's so cliche I can't
    even bring myself to protest.
[07:47] shi
    A bath is the best after a
    steamy day of club activities!
[07:51] yu
    I agree!
[07:53] en
    I can't take any more.
[08:10] haru
    The sound of splitting wood...
[08:12] aki
    Yes, as always...
[08:16] haru
    What's wrong?
[08:17] aki
    Someone's hanging around out there.
[08:20] haru
    Who is that?
[08:22] dada
    Dinner's ready.
[08:25] dada
    Come eat, you two.
[08:28] shi
    Listen up, you guys!
[08:30] shi
    If you can recieve my balls, you'll
    all be the best in the world...
[08:32] shi
    no, the best on Earth!
[08:35] yu
    President!
[08:36] yu
    How is the "best in the world"
    different from the "best on Earth"?
[08:38] shu
    The president is taking a bath with them.
[08:41] shu
    And I've never had a bath
    with him, even once...
[08:46] go
    Who are you?
[08:48] go
    A peeping Tom?
[08:49] shu
    N-No!
[08:52] go
    Hey!
[08:53] go
    Get back here!
[08:55] go
    He's a quick one.
[09:00] dada
    Today is toasted dumpling hot pot.
[09:03] dada
    Go on, eat!
[09:05] haru
    Why did you decide...
[09:07] aki
    ...to make toasted dumpling hot pot?
[09:09] dada
    Atmosphere, perhaps? Or for the sound of it?
[09:12] dada
    The "toast" part sounds
    like "warm and toasty!"
[09:15] haru
    "Toast" doesn't necessarily imply that.
[09:18] aki
    It can also mean "doomed."
[09:19] dada
    That's not what it's for!
[09:22] dada
    I was hoping to warm up your
    worn-out bodies and souls,
[09:25] dada
    after an exhausting day of being idols.
[09:30] dada
    Eat it and be grateful!
[09:32] haru
    Warm us up...
[09:33] aki
    ...body and...
[09:35] both
    ...soul?
[09:37] aki
    Go!
[09:38] haru
    He's so strong! Go!
[09:40] (Flashback) haru
    That man always warmed us up...
[09:43] (Flashback) aki
    ...so gently, body and...
[09:46] (Flashback) both
    ...soul...
[09:51] dada
    Okay!
[09:52] dada
    It's turned out great!
[09:55] dada
    Now, eat, you two!
[09:58] dada
    What's wrong?
[10:01] haru
    Oh...
[10:01] aki
    ...it's nothing.
[10:02] both
    Nothing at all!
[10:05] haru
    By the way, there are no carrots—
[10:07] aki
    —green peppers in there, right?
[10:10] dada
    Dammit...
[10:13] shi
    In the end, you're the only one left.
[10:16] yu
    Huh?
[10:17] yu
    You're right.
[10:19] yu
    That's weird.
[10:21] yu
    Where'd the others go?
[10:24] en
    I wonder...
[10:26] atsu
    Huh? Wonder what?
[10:28] en
    In Japanese, volleyball is called haikyu.
[10:32] at
    Yeah, and tennis is called teikyu, right?
[10:36] at
    And soccer is called shukyu.
[10:39] ryu
    But how do you write haikyu?
[10:41] io
    It's the "hai" from "excrement"
    with the character for ball.
[10:44] io
    Excrement ball.
[10:46] ryu
    The hai from excrement?!
[10:48] ryu
    Then volleyball is crapping out a ball?
[10:51] en
    Tennis is played on a court with a ball,
[10:53] en
    so I can understand why it's
    written as "court ball."
[10:56] en
    And soccer is about kicking a ball,
[10:58] en
    so I can see why it's written as "kick ball."
[11:02] at
    But why is volleyball
[11:04] at
    written with the hai from 'excrement'?
[11:13] aki
    Here.
[11:13] boys
    Thank you!
[11:15] boy
    The Apes will worship you for life!
[11:17] haru
    No problem.
[11:18] aki
    Come back any time.
[11:22] dada
    What kind of hot pot do you want today?
[11:25] dada
    It's the season for crab,
    so how about crab hot pot?
[11:27] dada
    Or what about oysters?
[11:30] aki
    Huh? He's...
[11:33] har
    The one from yesterday...
[11:38] shi
    Practice is over for today!
[11:40] shi
    Yumoto, I can't believe
    you received all my balls!
[11:44] shi
    You are truly the diamond in the
    rough I've been searching for!
[11:48] shi
    I'll never let you go!
[11:50] yu
    President! Thank you!
[11:53] shu
    "I'll never let you go"?
[11:55] shu
    President...
[11:56] shu
    I thought those words were only for me.
[12:00] shu
    H-He'll pay.
[12:07] haru
    The aroma of jealousy.
[12:09] aki
    I smell it.
[12:11] [Messenger] sign
    The Roaring Prince
    Battle Lover Sulfur
    Finishing Move:
    Sulfur Love Gaia
[12:21] shu
    You'll pay.
[12:23] shu
    President Munakata...
[12:25] shu
    You said I was the only one...
[12:28] shu
    You said you wouldn't ever let me go...
[12:31] shu
    That time, too...
[12:33] shu
    That time, too...
[12:35] shu
    I really thought you'd try to stop me..
[12:39] shu
    But that little...
[12:47] haru
    So you really...
[12:48] aki
    ...can't stand it, eh?
[12:50] shu
    Huh?
[12:51] shu
    Who are you?
[12:52] haru
    We're...
[12:53] aki
    ...on your side.
[12:55] shu
    My side?
[12:57] haru
    You should make him see your true worth...
[12:59] aki
    ...and regret what he's lost.
[13:02] aki
    That you are a diamond in the rough.
[13:04] aki
    A little polish would
    make you shine even more.
[13:06] both
    Why not show him that?
[13:15] gora
    Yumoto, how's the water?
[13:17] yu
    It's perfect, Gora!
[13:20] shi
    Yes, thank you as always!
[13:23] shi
    Why not join us?
[13:26] gora
    No.
[13:27] gora
    I'm not worthy to be there.
[13:31] shi
    It's wonderful that your
    brother is so humble.
[13:36] shi
    This is a hot water that only
    such humility can produce.
[13:38] shi
    But Yumoto, you must be more aggressive
    with my balls.
[13:42] shi
    Come at them thinking,
    "I'll never let you fall."
[13:44] shi
    That's how you win a tournament.
[13:47] yu
    But President,
[13:48] yu
    we can't participate in a tournament
    if we don't have enough people.
[13:52] shi
    Yes, I know.
[13:54] shi
    The truth is,
[13:56] shi
    I had only one other long-term
    club member besides you,
[13:59] shi
    but he quit recently.
[14:01] yu
    Wow, you had someone like that?
[14:04] shi
    And so in the eleven years
    I have been in this club,
[14:07] shi
    I have never once participated
    in a tournament.
[14:10] yu
    Eleven years?!
[14:11] yu
    How old are you now, President?
[14:14] shi
    Twenty-six.
[14:15] yu
    Twenty-six?!
[14:18] shi
    There are things you can only do
    during your high school years!
[14:22] shi
    I will not quit Binan High School volleyball
[14:24] shi
    until I take part in a tournament!
[14:26] yu
    President!
[14:27] yu
    You're dedicating your life to it, huh?
[14:29] yu
    That's amazing!
[14:30] yu
    I'm a little bit moved!
[14:32] en
    I can't believe he's 26.
[14:34] at
    Talk about peaking in high school.
[14:36] ryu
    Even Neverland would be shocked.
[14:39] ryu
    I'm surprised the school lets him stay.
[14:42] io
    The school's probably fine with
    it as long as he pays tuition.
[14:50] shu
    President Munakata...
[14:51] shu
    you'll regret this!
[14:53] shu
    I'm a diamond in the rough.
[14:55] shu
    The more you polish me, the more
    I will outshine Hakone Yumoto!
[15:04] shu
    Welcome to the VEPP Theater.
[15:10] shu
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[15:17] shu
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[15:20] shu
    On the name of the stars!
[15:30] shu
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    blooming in the galaxy!
[15:37] shu
    Moon and sun, miracles and secrets
[15:38] both
    The twin stars shining in the heavens!
[15:40] shu
    We're the stars making wishes come true!
[15:41] haru
    Salty Sol!
[15:42] aki
    Melty Luna!
[15:43] shu
    VEPPer, bringing a thrill
    to this blue planet!
[15:45] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[15:49] both
    Chosen warrior!
[15:50] shu
    Let's illuminate the entire world!
[15:51] haru
    Lucky you!
[15:53] aki
    Happy you!
[15:53] shu
    On the name of the stars!
[15:56] both
    Shooting...
[15:57] both
    Star!
[16:06] mon
    Hey! Look at me!
[16:09] yu
    What's that?
[16:10] yu
    A black volleyball?
[16:12] mon
    I may look black...
[16:14] mon
    But inside, I'm sparkling and shining!
[16:17] mon
    And my name...
[16:19] mon
    is Black Boba-yan Monster!
[16:21] yu
    Black Boba-yan?
[16:23] mon
    Look at me more!
[16:25] mon
    Receive my blackness!
[16:26] mon
    And polish me more!
[16:29] yu
    The black ball is coming at me!
[16:31] shi
    I am Muna! Kata!
[16:33] mon
    Boba-yan!
[16:37] shi
    Sky!
[16:39] en
    I think something went flying.
[16:41] io
    Looked like Munakata-san.
[16:43] at
    Yumoto's right.
[16:44] at
    Lots of things really do come flying
     and falling down in autumn.
[16:48] ryu
    Yeah...
[16:50] wom
    Everyone, I think it's your turn!
[16:55] en
    Yumoto, what's with the black ball?
[16:58] at
    I think it's supposed to be a volleyball.
[17:01] wom
    Now, everyone! Love Making!
[17:04] yu
    Love Making!
[17:32] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[17:35] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[17:38] yu
    Love Making!
[17:48] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[17:50] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[17:53] yu
    Love Making!
[18:02] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[18:04] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[18:07] yu
    Love Making!
[18:17] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[18:19] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[18:22] yu
    Love Making!
[18:32] ryu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[18:34] ryu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[18:36] en
    This love-filled planet will
    not abide those who lack love!
[18:40] ryu
    Those who wield loveless
    power must kneel before love!
[18:44] io
    Love is power!
[18:45] io
    Love is hope!
[18:47] atsu
    Be born for love!
[18:49] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[18:50] yu
    Love!
[18:52] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[18:55] five
    Battle Lovers!
[18:56] yu
    Feel the power...
[18:58] five
    Of love!
[19:01] mon
    Black is the color that
    absorbs all other colors!
[19:04] mon
    My black ball will suck
    up all of your love power!
[19:09] yu
    Scarlet Love Lumiere!
[19:12] en
    Cerulean Love Aqua!
[19:16] at
    Epinard Love Hurricane!
[19:19] io
    Sulfur Love Gaia!
[19:21] ryu
    Vesta Love Ignit!
[19:27] yu
    What? He sucked in all of our attacks!
[19:32] mon
    I'm the invincible Black Boba-yan!
[19:34] mon
    Boing! Boing!
[19:36] en
    He's bouncing around a lot.
[19:38] at
    Yeah, I think he's having fun.
[19:41] mon
    Look!
[19:42] mon
    Inside this black sphere
    shines the greatest of gems,
[19:45] mon
    even harder than diamond, brighter
    than the first star of evening!
[19:50] yu
    Then why do you hide it?
[19:55] mon
    Because...
[19:56] mon
    he wouldn't polish me,
[19:59] mon
    so I gave up on shining.
[20:01] yu
    So you can't shine unless
    someone else polishes you?
[20:07] yu
    Instead of relying on someone else,
[20:09] yu
    you have to make yourself shine!
[20:10] yu
    Because you're a really
    beautiful diamond, right?
[20:14] mon
    W-Well...
[20:17] yu
    Don't worry!
[20:18] yu
    I know you can do it!
[20:19] yu
    You can shine!
[20:21] mon
    Even... I can?
[20:23] yu
    Yeah!
[20:24] yu
    Now, take this!
[20:40] yu
    True Love Attack!
[20:54] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[21:08] yu
    Love is over!
[21:19] yu
    Boy, am I glad!
[21:22] yu
    Shuzo-san is back with the volleyball club!
[21:25] yu
    "Shuzo! I was waiting for
    you to pull yourself up!"
[21:29] yu
    That's what the president
    said. He's as on-fire as ever!
[21:32] en
    In the end, their little lovers'
    quarrel was the cause of it all.
[21:37] at
    Yeah.
[21:38] at
    It really put us through a lot.
[21:39] ryu
    But what are you going to do about
    the volleyball club, Yumoto?
[21:42] yu
    I quit!
[21:44] yu
    After all, I'm in the Earth Defense Club!
[21:47] wom
    Yes! That's right!
[21:49] io
    But with Oka Shuzo back, the
    club only has two members...
[21:54] ryu
    Does that mean Munakata won't
    graduate this year, either?
[21:57] yu
    That's right!
[21:59] yu
    The president and Shuzo-san said
[22:00] yu
    they would continue their fiery training
    until they get into a tournament!
[22:03] yu
    They're totally fired up!
[22:05] at
    Never going to graduate, huh?
[22:09] en
    Two for Neverland, huh?
[22:14] dada
    Chicken was on sale today,
    so I made chicken hot pot.
[22:18] dada
    Come on, eat up, you two.
[22:21] dada
    It will warm up your cold hearts.
[22:24] haru
    Hakone...
[22:26] aki
    ...Yumoto...
[22:27] both
    We will make you pay!
SIGN    Everyone Loves Someone!
SIGN    Next time:
[24:01] ryu
    Next time:
    Everyone Loves Someone!
[24:04] ryu
    Love Making!
[24:05] ---
    

Season 2

6 - Everyone Loves Someone!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] wom
    --
[00:00] five
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] yu
    --
[00:11] en
    Man, I give up.
[00:14] at
    That was kind of surprising.
[00:16] yu
    Hey. I'm trembling a little right now.
[00:19] en
    How come?
[00:20] yu
    Fighting and conflict and
    dissidence and animosity...
[00:23] yu
    It makes me so uncomfortable...
[00:25] yu
    When I see it, I don't know how to handle it.
[00:29] at
    Those are a few fairly advanced
    words you know, Yumoto.
[00:32] yu
    Because they make me uncomfortable,
    I can remember them even better.
[00:35] yu
    It's like they're burned
    into my brain, I guess.
[00:38] yu
    It just makes me so uncomfortable.
[00:40] at
    Well, I'm the same way.
[00:43] at
    I want to live a life without conflict,
[00:45] at
    and I want that for the
    people around me, too.
[00:48] en
    You said it.
[00:49] yu
    Why did this have to happen, huh?
SIGN    Everyone Loves Someone!
[02:31] yu
    It's over! It's over!
[02:33] yu
    Class is over!
[02:35] yu
    Senpais, I just learned something!
[02:38] yu
    Sea slug mating... it's incredible!
[02:42] yu
    They're hermaphrodites, see...
[02:45] yu
    They have a sexual organ on
    each end of their body...
[02:49] en
    Tell us more about sea slug mating!
[02:51] at
    I'd love to hear all about it!
[02:53] yu
    Um, well,
[02:54] yu
    sea slugs have both male
    and female sexual organs,
[02:57] yu
    so apparently, they can line up in a block,
[02:59] yu
    innie to outie and innie to outie...
[03:02] yu
    But instead of forming a train
    like you might be thinking,
[03:06] yu
    they can actually join up in a big ring...
[03:09] en
    Wow, that's amazing!
[03:11] at
    How do you know that?
[03:13] yu
    Well, I was talking with everyone...
[03:16] wom
    It's love, of course!
[03:18] wom
    Love connects people in a giant chain
    that goes all the way into space!
[03:22] yu
    Wow!
[03:23] yu
    That's huge!
[03:26] yu
    Um... Io-senpai?
[03:28] io
    Can I help you?
[03:30] yu
    And Ryuu-senpai...
[03:31] ryu
    What do you want?
[03:33] yu
    What's wrong?
[03:34] both
    Why do you ask?
[03:36] yu
    Well... you're acting...
    a little different...
[03:39] io
    Are we?
[03:41] ryu
    You think?
[03:42] yu
    Io-senpai, what are your
    thoughts on hermaphroditism?
[03:45] yu
    Like "Doubling up must improve
    their cost performance!"
[03:47] yu
    "What economic efficiency!" Or something.
[03:49] ryu
    Yeah, that's true.
[03:51] ryu
    You could run a calculation like
    that in a split second, right?
[03:55] io
    What is that supposed to mean?
[03:56] ryu
    Nothing.
[03:58] ryu
    I'm not saying
[03:59] ryu
    "For someone so good at calculations,
    your bank balance has been slipping lately;
[04:01] ryu
    I hope you're okay," or anything like that.
[04:04] io
    Yes, because a little
    ebb and flow is natural.
[04:06] io
    But yeah, sea slugs are impressive.
[04:09] io
    They could have a date or a fling with
    anyone they meet anywhere, like someone else I know.
[04:12] ryu
    Are you saying I'm a sea slug?
[04:15] io
    Sea slugs are cute.
[04:18] yu
    Cows are cute, too!
[04:20] yu
    I like brown cows!
[04:22] yu
    A lot more than the black and white kind.
[04:24] yu
    For some reason, I just like brown better!
[04:29] yu
    Although I like pandas because
    they're black and white...
[04:32] yu
    I guess I'd be disappointed if
    they were just brown all over.
[04:35] yu
    I wonder why that is?
[04:37] at
    Because then they'd be ordinary bears.
[04:39] en
    It's a little early, but I'm going
    to head for the Kurotama Bath.
[04:44] en
    Atsushi, you come with me.
[04:46] en
    You too, Yumoto.
[04:47] yu
    O-Okay.
[04:49] en
    Anyone else in?
[04:51] en
    No?
[04:53] en
    If not, let's head out.
[05:01] wom
    Excuse me!
[05:02] wom
    This is a threat to the continued
    existence of the Battle Lovers!
[05:06] wom
    I must do something to break the deadlock!
[05:09] wom
    I call it Operation: Restoration of Love!
[05:13] ryu
    Oh, right.
[05:14] ryu
    Wom-chan, want some candy?
[05:17] wom
    Thank you very much!
[05:21] io
    Wom-san prefers spinach, I believe.
[05:24] io
    I thought he hated sweets.
[05:28] ryu
    That's not why he took it.
[05:31] ryu
    Wom-san won't turn down anybody
    who's trying to be nice.
[05:36] io
    Because he never lets anyone turn him down
    when he's trying to be nice?
[05:41] ryu
    I guess you can't get rich
    unless you assume the worst of everybody.
[05:48] yu
    That's probably what's going on,
    and Wom-san's having a hard time,
[05:50] yu
    being left in the middle like that.
[05:53] at
    He could have just come with us.
[05:55] en
    Wom-san's the kind of guy
    who would stay, though.
[05:57] at
    Yeah, since leaving them alone together
[05:59] at
    feels like it would bring things to a head.
[06:02] yu
    What do you mean, "bring them to a head"?
[06:04] yu
    That's not what I want!
[06:06] at
    But it's not like those two had
    anything in common to begin with.
[06:10] en
    Yeah.
[06:11] en
    They're a miraculous pair.
[06:14] en
    It's a miracle they can be in the same room.
[06:16] at
    Apparently they both had an awful
    first impression of each other, too.
SIGN    Class 1-A
[06:20] (Flashback) ryu
    Going Dutch?
[06:22] (Flashback) ryu
    No way.
[06:23] (Flashback) ryu
    The guy should pay.
[06:24] (Flashback) A
    How come?
[06:26] (Flashback) A
    Women's lib, man.
[06:28] (Flashback) ryu
    That gender theory stuff
    doesn't matter on a date.
[06:31] (Flashback) ryu
    How do you let a girl know you like her?
[06:34] (Flashback) ryu
    With words?
[06:35] (Flashback) ryu
    With actions?
[06:36] (Flashback) ryu
    Or with telepathy?
[06:38] (Flashback) ryu
    That one's nice if you can
    do it, but most people can't.
[06:42] (Flashback) ryu
    So the simplest way is to just
    say "I'll pay for the date."
[06:48] (Flashback) ryu
    There's no girl who won't like
    having you pick up her cup of tea,
[06:52] (Flashback) ryu
    and it's a small price to pay to
    let her know you like her, right?
[06:55] (Flashback) kids
    Y-Yeah!
[06:57] (Flashback) ryu
    Well, my girlfriend never lets me pay, though.
[07:01] (Flashback) ryu
    See, this is what we call
    a benefit-cost ratio.
[07:05] (Flashback) io
    Sorry.
[07:07] (Flashback) ryu
    Is something I said amusing to you?
[07:11] (Flashback) io
    Not really.
[07:12] (Flashback) io
    It was just funny to hear someone talk
[07:15] (Flashback) io
    about benefit-cost ratios over
    something as silly as dating.
[07:18] (Flashback) ryu
    If you ask me, obsessing
    over money is much sillier.
[07:22] (Flashback) io
    Oh, you've taken the time to learn who I am?
[07:25] (Flashback) io
    I'm not an investment, you know.
    There are better uses of your time.
[07:28] (Flashback) ryu
    No, I just know you because you're so annoying.
[07:32] yu
    So why did they both join the Defense Club?
[07:36] en
    Well...
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[07:43] (Flashback) both
    Yes?
[07:45] (Flashback) io
    Is this the Earth Defense Club?
[07:45] (Flashback) ryu
    Is this Earth Defense Club thing for real?
[07:48] (Flashback) en
    Y-Yeah...
[07:49] (Flashback) at
    Yes...
[07:55] at
    I was just happy to have a new member...
[07:58] yu
    So you accepted them both?
[08:00] yu
    Separately?
[08:01] en
    Well, we didn't know they hated each other.
[08:07] (Flashback) io
    Well, well.
[08:11] (Flashback) io
    Would you please stop getting in my face?
[08:14] (Flashback) ryu
    You're the one getting in my face!
[08:17] (Flashback) io
    I heard overly persistent
    men never get dates!
[08:20] (Flashback) ryu
    That's right, it's important
    to know when to quit!
[08:23] (Flashback) ryu
    The Defense Club is perfect for
    skipping class and napping.
[08:25] (Flashback) ryu
    Don't get in my way!
[08:27] (Flashback) io
    Sometimes I want to look at the
    markets in peace and quiet, too!
[08:30] (Flashback) io
    Why don't you quit instead?
[08:32] (Flashback) both
    I want to join the club!
[08:35] yu
    So what happened then?
[08:37] en
    Well, we couldn't not let them join the club.
[08:40] at
    Although the club itself hadn't
    been registered at that point...
[08:45] (Flashback) ryu
    This new series is so funny!
[08:47] (Flashback) io
    As I thought, biotech
    stocks are on the rise.
[08:50] (Flashback) io
    I'll have to check the price
    movements in the future.
[08:55] (Flashback) en
    Hey, Atsushi...
[08:57] (Flashback) at
    En-chan...
[08:59] (Flashback) ryu
    You heading home?
[09:01] (Flashback) io
    I'll accompany you.
[09:02] (Flashback) ryu
    How come?
[09:04] (Flashback) io
    What do you mean, how come?
[09:06] (Flashback) ryu
    What do you mean, what do I mean, how come?
[09:08] (Flashback) io
    What do you mean, what do I mean,
    what do you mean, how come?
[09:12] (Flashback) en
    It's okay. You don't have
    to go out of your way.
[09:14] (Flashback) at
    You two just do what you want.
[09:16] (Flashback) io
    No, I was thinking of going myself...
[09:19] (Flashback) ryu
    It seems like it would be fun to go together.
[09:22] (Flashback) ryu
    Well, together, minus one.
[09:25] (Flashback) en
    Look, you guys both hate each other, right?
[09:29] (Flashback) ryu
    Yes, we do.
[09:30] (Flashback) io
    Even worse than hate, I would say.
[09:33] (Flashback) ryu
    There he goes, nitpicking.
[09:34] (Flashback) io
    And you just want to agree
    with everything he says.
[09:38] (Flashback) at
    Are you sure it doesn't wrap back
    around to you liking each other?
[09:42] (Flashback) both
    No!
[09:44] (Flashback) both
    I mean—
[09:45] (Flashback) en
    See, you're a perfect match.
[09:47] (Flashback) ryu
    Yeah, right!
[09:47] (Flashback) io
    You're mistaken!
SIGN    Investigation: Zaou Ryuu
[09:54] haru
    Why is this happening?
SIGN    Investigation: Naruko Io
[09:55] haru
    That trash!
[09:57] aki
    It's hard to understand the
    reasoning of commoners and trash.
[10:00] kuma
    Haru-sama. Aki-sama.
[10:03] kuma
    Bamboo tea.
[10:05] aki
    Oh, bamboo tea.
[10:06] ---
    Thank you.
[10:07] aki
    I'm surprised an Ape would make something
    as fashionable as bamboo tea.
[10:11] kuma
    O-Of course, yes, please call me an ape.
[10:14] kuma
    Just, um... um...
[10:17] haru
    What is it?
[10:18] kuma
    How...
[10:19] kuma
    How does it feel to be an idol?
[10:22] haru
    What do you mean by that?
SIGN    Kumano Kuroshiro
[10:24] kuma
    I was just wondering what it must be like,
[10:27] kuma
    to be loved and admired by everyone...
[10:31] kuma
    I'm sorry!
[10:32] kuma
    It's not that I'm jealous of
    you or anything like that!
[10:34] kuma
    I've never, ever felt something
    so inappropriate...
[10:39] kuma
    Well, maybe once, twice... 23 times...
[10:45] haru
    What?
[10:46] aki
    Then why not be one?
[10:54] shu
    Welcome to the VEPP Theater.
[11:00] shu
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[11:07] shu
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[11:10] shu
    On the name of the stars!
[11:20] shu
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    blooming in the galaxy!
[11:27] shu
    Moon and sun, miracles and secrets
[11:29] both
    The twin stars shining in the heavens!
[11:30] shu
    We're the stars making wishes come true!
[11:31] haru
    Salty Sol!
[11:33] aki
    Melty Luna!
[11:33] shu
    VEPPer, bringing a thrill
    to this blue planet!
[11:36] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[11:39] both
    Chosen warrior!
[11:40] shu
    Let's illuminate the entire world!
[11:41] haru
    Lucky you!
[11:43] aki
    Happy you!
[11:43] shu
    On the name of the stars!
[11:46] both
    Shooting...
[11:47] both
    Star!
[11:55] yu
    The True Lovracelets...
[11:58] en
    A monster, at a time like this?
[12:00] at
    You think those two will even come?
[12:02] en
    Even if they do, they can't fight together
    when they're bickering like that.
[12:07] yu
    We'll just have to make do
    with the three of us, then!
[12:10] yu
    Let's Love Making!
[12:13] yu
    Love Making!
[12:18] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[12:21] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[12:23] yu
    The Flashing Prince!
[12:25] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[12:28] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[12:30] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[12:33] yu
    Feel the power...
[12:35] five
    Of love!
[12:38] [Messenger] sign
    The Thrilling Prince
    Battle Lover Vesta
    Finishing Move: Vesta Love Ignit
[12:49] all
    So cute!
[12:56] pan
    I'm Panda Monster.
[12:58] pan
    But although I'm a monster, my
    ultimate move is "cuteness."
[13:01] pan
    No one can oppose my cuteness.
[13:08] all
    So cute!
[13:10] pan
    Bamboo...
[13:13] all
    So cute!
[13:16] guy
    It pooped!
[13:17] all
    So cute!
[13:19] yu
    Don't be fooled!
[13:24] yu
    If you think we'll let you do anything
    because you're cute, you've got another thing coming!
[13:28] pan
    There they are.
[13:29] pan
    People jealous of my cuteness.
[13:32] pan
    But I've already prepared for the
    appearance of cowards like you!
[13:36] guy
    Don't be mean to the panda!
[13:41] en
    What?
[13:42] en
    Is this the cliche yet exciting twist
    where the townspeople turn on the heroes?
[13:46] at
    Are they really going to bring that out
    for a pooping panda?
[13:50] pan
    You can't recover from the two-fold shock!
[13:52] yu
    You're one to talk!
[13:54] yu
    All you do is poop!
[13:56] yu
    That's perverted!
[13:57] pan
    Sh-Shut up!
[13:58] pan
    My poo is made from bamboo,
    so it doesn't stink!
[14:01] pan
    Take this!
[14:03] pan
    Poo Bomb!
[14:09] en
    Oh, come on!
[14:10] en
    That's way too straightforward!
[14:11] at
    Yet we've never faced such
    a dangerous technique!
[14:14] en
    Cerulean Love Aqua!
[14:17] at
    Epinard Love Hurricane!
[14:20] yu
    Scarlet Love Lumiere!
[14:31] pan
    The praise of others makes me stronger.
[14:34] pan
    And jealousy and resentment make me bigger!
[14:43] both
    Yumoto!
[14:44] en
    You're not all that just
    because you're a panda!
[14:47] at
    Some people do prefer polar bears, you know!
[14:50] yu
    It's no use, Senpai!
[14:52] yu
    He's that annoying type that will
[14:56] yu
    interpret anything you say as jealousy!
[14:59] pan
    You're the annoying ones here!
[15:02] pan
    Take this!
[15:03] pan
    Bamboo Storm!
[15:19] pan
    Did you know that pandas
[15:21] pan
    sometimes eat mice and other small mammals?
[15:25] pan
    You three are like mice to me!
[15:29] pan
    Do you understand what I'm getting at?
[15:32] ryu
    Like hell!
[15:37] ryu
    Stop saying stuff we need
    to figure out, poo-face!
[15:40] io
    There's no need to understand, anyway!
[15:42] ryu
    Vesta Love Ignit!
[15:46] io
    Sulfur Love Gaia!
[15:52] pan
    Wh-What is this?
[15:54] pan
    This isn't jealousy or resentment!
[15:56] ryu
    We just don't give a damn about you!
[15:59] io
    Although you do need to pay for having the
    nerve to stand against the Battle Lovers.
[16:03] ryu
    Io, you're more aggressive than I thought.
[16:06] io
    You're one to talk, Ryuu.
[16:08] en
    Did you two make up?
[16:11] ryu
    Huh?
[16:12] io
    Certainly not!
[16:16] at
    Then what are you doing here?
[16:19] both
    They're unrelated incidents!
[16:24] pan
    To hit a cute panda...
[16:27] pan
    you call yourselves human?!
[16:29] ryu
    You're not even a panda.
[16:31] ryu
    You're a panda monster, y'know?
[16:33] io
    Just being cute isn't enough!
[16:35] io
    Running a business means
    solving your own problems,
[16:38] io
    and you must always strive for
    innovation and change!
[16:41] ryu
    The road to popularity is a thorny
    path that requires constant hard work!
[16:44] ryu
    Are you prepared to walk that road?!
[16:47] yu
    Senpais, it's time!
[16:49] yu
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[16:54] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[16:57] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[17:01] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[17:04] ryu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[17:11] yu
    Io-Ryuu-senpai, it's up to you!
[17:15] ryu
    Shall we?
[17:16] io
    Yeah!
[17:17] both
    Don't wallow in love!
[17:19] both
    True Love Attack!
[17:32] both
    True Love Fountain!
[17:49] both
    Love is over!
[17:50] aki
    Don't wallow in love, eh?
[17:54] haru
    You're one to talk.
[17:55] yu
    You two!
[17:56] all
    VEPPer!
[17:58] haru
    The likes of you
[18:00] haru
    could never understand the thought
    process of someone who is loved.
[18:02] aki
    You lack any qualification
    to speak on the matter.
[18:06] aki
    In short, you're insufficient.
[18:08] yu
    Huh?
[18:09] yu
    What do you mean?
[18:10] haru
    It's not you, the Battle Lovers,
[18:12] haru
    who are worthy of the love of thousands.
[18:14] aki
    You'll see that that love is
    reserved for us, VEPPer.
[18:18] aki
    Little by little.
[18:21] yu
    What was all that, about
    being worthy of love?
[18:24] en
    I'm getting the feeling they
    don't like us very much.
[18:29] en
    Can't put my finger on it.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[18:39] at
    Yumoto's engaged in repetitive behavior.
[18:42] at
    Like a stressed wolf at the zoo.
[18:47] en
    Come on, Ryuu, Io.
[18:48] en
    Get a grip already.
[18:50] io
    I'm sorry, Yufuin-senpai.
[18:52] io
    I'm a very petty person.
[18:54] ryu
    I know I'm worse than Io.
[18:58] ryu
    I'm an idiot who only thinks
    about getting with girls.
[19:00] io
    What are you talking about?
[19:02] io
    Your dating habits stimulate the economy.
[19:05] io
    It's worthy of praise.
[19:08] ryu
    Your investments are way more amazing.
[19:10] ryu
    You're committed to the
    development of your business.
[19:13] ryu
    My little dates are nothing compared to that.
[19:17] io
    No, in the end, the economy
    comes down to people.
[19:20] io
    The economy can't function if
    people don't go about their lives.
[19:23] io
    That's what you're doing.
[19:27] ryu
    You're much more amazing!
[19:28] ryu
    Acknowledge it already!
[19:29] io
    I will not!
[19:30] io
    Ryuu, you should have confidence instead!
[19:33] ryu
    Shut up, you genius!
[19:35] io
    Give it a rest already, you icon!
[19:37] wom
    Wait a minute!
[19:39] en
    What?
[19:40] en
    Are those backhanded compliments?
[19:42] en
    Or do you actually both think
    the world of each other?
[19:44] both
    Yes, I do!
[19:46] ryu
    It's just that he...
[19:47] io
    You...
[19:48] both
    ...won't admit it!
[19:51] yu
    Oh, I have a question!
[19:53] yu
    How did this start?
[19:55] both
    Because the other boys in
    class were making fun of him!
[19:59] ryu
    That's why I was explaining
    how amazing Io was!
[20:02] io
    I explained it to them, kindly and concisely!
[20:06] ryu
    But Io overheard it and denied it!
[20:08] io
    Because I lack even 1/10th of your value!
[20:11] ryu
    But I told you!
[20:13] ryu
    You're amazing!
[20:14] ryu
    Why won't you acknowledge it?
[20:15] io
    I'm not amazing!
[20:17] (Flashback) ryu
    Amazing! Amazing! Amazing!
[20:17] io
    What's so amazing about me?!
[20:19] en
    This is freaking dumb!!!
[20:23] at
    I just remembered.
[20:24] at
    When you came to the Kurotama
    Bath for the first time,
[20:27] at
    it was just like this.
[20:29] (Flashback) ryu
    Yeah, right!
[20:29] (Flashback) io
    You're mistaken!
[20:33] (Flashback) io
    This is the worst.
[20:33] (Flashback) ryu
    This stinks.
[20:35] (Flashback) gora
    Excuse me, sirs.
[20:37] (Flashback) gora
    We can dry your uniforms quickly.
[20:39] (Flashback) gora
    In the meantime, please, get in the bath.
[20:46] (Flashback) io
    What on Earth?
[20:48] (Flashback) ryu
    How pushy can you get?
[20:54] (Flashback) io
    Not bad at all, huh?
[20:56] (Flashback) ryu
    Yeah, pretty good.
[20:57] (Flashback) io
    I guess we can agree on some things.
[21:00] (Flashback) ryu
    I'm pretty shocked, too.
[21:02] (Flashback) en
    Well, I guess they're both in the club.
[21:06] (Flashback) at
    Are you okay with that?
[21:07] (Flashback) both
    Yeah!
[21:09] en
    In retrospect, I'm grateful
    for that splash of water.
[21:12] at
    Without that, they might have
    never spoken to each other again.
[21:17] wom
    What's wrong?
[21:19] yu
    I'm sorry!
[21:20] yu
    The one who splashed you was probably me!
[21:28] (Flashback) yu
    The ridge tiles on a bathhouse are
    guardian spirits against fire!
[21:31] (Flashback) yu
    Thanks for all your help!
[21:34] (Flashback) yu
    But we're a natural hot spring,
    so there's no danger of fire!
[21:38] (Flashback) yu
    Oh well!
[21:40] (Flashback) gora
    Yumoto.
[21:43] (Flashback) gora
    I need you to wash these
    and iron them quickly.
[21:48] (Flashback) yu
    Big bro, are these from Binan High School?
[21:52] yu
    That's the time you were
    talking about, right?
[21:55] yu
    I think I need to apologize to you both.
[21:59] ryu
    Huh? What?
[22:00] io
    We're the ones who should apologize.
[22:02] io
    For bringing down the mood in the club room.
[22:04] yu
    Not that!
[22:06] yu
    Because I was hasty with
    the iron, the lining...
[22:14] yu
    I'm sorry!
[22:15] ryu
    That was you?!
[22:16] io
    I always wondered...
[22:18] wom
    Now, now.
[22:19] wom
    It means you match me! It's premiere!
[22:22] both
    I'm not happy about that at all!
[22:25] wom
    What did you say?!
[22:27] wom
    Love shock!
SIGN    A Christmas of Love and Miracles
SIGN    Next Time
[24:01] yu
    Next time: "A Christmas of
    Love and Miracles!"
[24:04] yu
    Love Making!
[24:05] ---
    

Season 2

7 - A Christmas of Love and Miracles

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] yu
    --
[00:00] both
    --
[00:00] both
    --
[00:00] wom
    --
SIGN    Ole! Ramen
SIGN    Hijiriya Hitori
SIGN    Ole! Ramen
[00:26] man
    Here's your ramen!
[00:27] all
    Wow!
[00:29] ryu
    Looks delicious!
[00:30] yu
    Let's eat!
[00:37] wom
    Yes!
[00:40] en
    Hey, I've been thinking...
[00:43] at
    Yes?
[00:44] en
    Christmas Eve is coming.
[00:46] en
    How about we hold a Chri-pa?
[00:49] all
    A Chri-pa?!
[00:51] at
    What's going on?
[00:52] at
    En-chan, you're usually the one
    that hates that stuff the most...
[00:54] en
    Well, I was thinking it's important
    to engage with the 'mas.
[00:59] yu
    Oh, I get it!
[01:00] yu
    En-chan-senpai is bursting
    with Christmas spirit!
[01:03] yu
    I'm so in!
[01:05] yu
    And we'll have the party at
    Kurotama Bath, of course!
[01:07] en
    A Chri-pa with a hot bath, huh?
[01:09] en
    Okay, let's do it.
[01:11] yu
    Yeah!
[01:12] yu
    I'm looking forward to it so much!
[01:15] en
    Now, we just have to figure out the food...
[01:19] man
    We've got you!
[01:22] yu
    Ole! Christmas Ramen?
[01:25] ryu
    Wow...
[01:26] ryu
    This shop's finally gone down
    the Christmas hole too, huh?
[01:28] io
    Opportunism is a fundamental
    part of doing business.
[01:32] en
    This sounds good to me.
[01:34] yu
    Got it!
[01:35] yu
    Mister, we want a Christmas
    ramen delivery on Christmas Eve!
[01:40] yu
    Send it to the Kurotama Bath!
[01:42] man
    Okay!
[01:45] sei
    Ole! I'm back.
[01:47] yu
    Huh? Hijiriya-kun?
[01:49] hij
    Hey...
[01:50] yu
    I see!
[01:51] yu
    Is this where you live?
[01:53] at
    You know him?
[01:54] yu
    He's my classmate, Hijiriya-kun!
[01:57] yu
    Bro Gora!
[02:00] go
    Oh, welcome back, Yumoto.
[02:02] yu
    Hey, can we have a Chri-pa
    here on Christmas Eve?
[02:06] go
    A Chri-pa?
[02:07] yu
    It means "Christmas party"!
[02:09] yu
    We're going to gather at Kurotama Bath
[02:11] yu
    and have cake
[02:12] yu
    and get ramen delivered
[02:14] yu
    and exchange presents!
[02:16] yu
    Of course, you're invited too!
[02:18] yu
    So can we reserve the bath for Christmas Eve?
[02:21] go
    Me and Christmas cake...
[02:23] go
    Me and ramen delivery...
[02:25] go
    Me and exchanging presents...
[02:28] go
    Yes, you can.
[02:29] yu
    Yeah!
SIGN    A Christmas of Love and Miracles
[04:09] haru
    It's Christmas, huh?
[04:11] aki
    Yeah...
[04:24] (Flashback) haru
    Today's Christmas Eve!
[04:26] (Flashback) aki
    You think Santa Claus
    will bring us a present?
[04:29] (Flashback) haru
    I doubt it. He never does.
[04:33] (Flashback) aki
    But don't worry!
[04:35] (Flashback) aki
    He's our true Santa!
[04:38] (Flashback) haru
    Yeah, he is!
[04:40] (Flashback) aki
    We don't need Santa...
[04:43] both
    We don't need Christmas.
SIGN    Ole! Ramen
[04:51] man
    It's done.
SIGN    Merry Christmas
SIGN    Ole! Ramen.
[04:57] hij
    Ole.
[04:59] hij
    I'm off.
[05:03] kid
    Wow, lame.
[05:05] kid
    Hey, keep it down.
[05:12] haru
    Hey there, Red-Nosed Reindeer.
[05:14] aki
    The day you fear and hate most
    in the whole year has arrived.
[05:19] both
    Christmas Eve!
[05:20] hij
    Wh-Who are you two?
[05:22] haru
    16 years without a girlfriend.
[05:25] aki
    And no friends who like to throw parties.
[05:27] haru
    So you spend every Christmas Eve
[05:29] haru
    doing nothing but delivering
    ramen for your father.
[05:35] haru
    And every year hence, forever and ever...
[05:38] aki
    Stewing in hatred and resentment
    of people happier than you...
[05:41] both
    That's how you'll spend this day.
[05:46] aki
    Wouldn't you just love...
[05:47] haru
    ...to get rid of this day?
[05:50] hij
    I hate Christmas...
[05:52] hij
    I hate Christmas...
[05:54] hij
    I wish it would just go away!
[05:56] haru
    Then why don't we grant...
[05:58] aki
    ...that wish of yours?
[05:59] hij
    Huh? How?
[06:08] haru
    Now we just wait for him to do the rest.
[06:11] aki
    We just have to wait...
[06:13] both
    ...for the moment Christmas dies.
[06:19] both
    G-Gora-san!
[06:21] go
    Hello there, neighbors.
[06:23] go
    Sorry to surprise you from the rooftop.
[06:25] go
    Yumoto is holding a Christmas party
    today, so I'm hanging decorations.
[06:29] both
    Oh, really?
[06:31] go
    Well, what about you two?
[06:34] go
    Would you like to join us?
[06:40] haru
    We were invited!
[06:42] aki
    We were invited!
[06:44] haru
    We were invited!
[06:45] aki
    We were invited!
[06:47] haru
    We were invited!
[06:49] aki
    We were invited!
[06:51] aki
    What to do?
[06:52] haru
    What to do?
[06:53] aki
    What to do?
[06:53] haru
    What to do?
[06:55] both
    Invited by the Santa Claus we've longed for!
[07:01] dada
    Come along and have dinner!
[07:04] dada
    I finished the Christmas gyoza!
[07:07] haru
    Sorry, Dadacha.
[07:10] haru
    We're going...
[07:11] aki
    ...to the Chri-pa across the way!
[07:14] both
    Later!
[07:16] dada
    Wait!
[07:17] dada
    What about the monster?
[07:22] both
    That's right!
[07:24] both
    What do we do?!
[07:25] haru
    After we finally got invited...
[07:27] aki
    After we finally get to join the ranks
    of people satisfied living in reality...
[07:30] haru
    At this rate, Christmas...
[07:32] aki
    And all people living in
    reality across the world...
[07:34] both
    ...are going to be destroyed!
[07:36] dada
    That's right! So—
[07:38] haru
    Hey, Dadacha!
[07:40] haru
    Where's that monster right now?
[07:42] aki
    Find him!
[07:42] haru
    And tell him!
[07:44] haru
    The plot...
[07:45] aki
    ...to destroy Christmas
    all across the world...
[07:47] both
    ...is off!
[07:51] en
    Well, I think everything's in order.
[07:53] en
    Let's have a toast.
[07:55] yu
    Okay!
[07:56] wom
    By the way, today we're having
    "Having a Christmas Toast With You
[08:00] wom
    Love Shower Drink."
[08:03] ryu
    What's with that oh-so-conspicuous
    introduction?
[08:06] wom
    This is what we always
    toast with at celebrations
[08:09] wom
    on #^$, where I was born.''
[08:12] both
    Excuse us!
[08:14] ryu
    Huh?
[08:15] ryu
    Who could that be?
[08:16] at
    Were you selling tickets to the party?
[08:18] io
    No!
[08:20] both
    Hello there!
[08:21] en
    Oh, you two.
[08:23] io
    The Beppu Brothers?
[08:24] yu
    It is!
[08:25] yu
    It's Brothers-senpai!
[08:27] ryu
    What are you doing here?
[08:28] go
    Oh, well, I...
[08:30] haru
    Oh, Gora-san!
[08:31] haru
    Thank you very much...
[08:33] both
    ...for inviting us!
[08:35] en
    What are super idols doing
    here on Christmas Eve?
[08:38] io
    It is curious.
[08:40] io
    You'd think they would have had other plans.
[08:43] ryu
    You can't invite the Beppus just like that.
[08:46] ryu
    They're serious idols at our school.
[08:49] ryu
    For now.
[08:50] both
    For now?!
[08:51] gora
    I'm sorry, I didn't realize...
[08:54] haru
    Oh, don't worry about it!
[08:56] aki
    We did have plans, but...
[08:58] both
    We canceled them!
[09:01] en
    So you say. But I bet you really
    had nothing better to do.
[09:05] yu
    So, Brothers-senpai!
[09:07] yu
    Why don't you join us in a toast
    with our Love Shower Drink?
[09:11] go
    Here!
[09:12] both
    Yes! Thank you!
[09:14] yu
    Well, Brothers-senpai!
[09:16] yu
    Please sit here!
[09:19] go
    Have a seat here.
[09:20] both
    Thank you!
[09:24] en
    Good thing I printed a
    few extra just in case.
[09:27] en
    Here, you can have some.
[09:29] haru
    Chri-pa...
[09:31] aki
    ...schedule?
[09:33] en
    Okay, let's get started.
[09:35] en
    Merry...
[09:36] all
    Christmas!
[09:38] yu
    Brothers-senpai, thank you for joining us!
[09:41] yu
    Cheers!
[09:45] both
    Gora-san! Cheers!
[09:47] gora
    Yeah, cheers!
[09:49] yu
    Huh?
[09:55] yu
    The cake and the Love Shower
    Drink are both super delicious!
[09:58] gora
    Oh, Yumoto.
[10:00] gora
    You got some cream on you.
[10:02] yu
    Oh, bro!
[10:03] yu
    Thank you!
[10:10] ryu
    Hey, Beppu-kuns.
[10:12] ryu
    You got cream on you.
[10:15] ryu
    What?
[10:16] ryu
    Did I do something wrong?
[10:17] yu
    Brothers-senpai, feel
    free to eat all you like!
[10:21] go
    Here you are.
[10:23] both
    Yes!
[10:24] both
    Thank you!
[10:27] en
    Speaking of eating, where's
    the Christmas ramen?
[10:29] io
    We ordered it for 7:00...
[10:33] haru
    I hope Dadacha's handling it...
[10:36] aki
    Don't worry.
[10:37] aki
    Nothing will happen.
[10:38] haru
    We can't let it happen...
[10:40] both
    At least, not until we get his present!
SIGN    Galaxy Idols VEPPer Most popular songs: You Are a Distant First-Magnitude Star StarTheVEPPer*
[10:49] yu
    Senpai, if the ramen's not coming,
    we should exchange presents first!
[10:54] yu
    I can't wait!
[10:56] aki
    What a great idea!
[10:58] haru
    Let's do it!
[11:00] en
    Guess we'll have to.
[11:02] en
    Swapping ramen smile time and
    present exchange time, huh?
[11:07] ryu
    But exchanging presents
[11:10] ryu
    is the highlight of the Chri-pa.
[11:12] ryu
    You gotta save the best
    part for the end, right?
[11:16] en
    He's right.
[11:18] en
    Well, let's swap it with the
    Christmas song sing-a-long instead.
[11:22] ryu
    Yeah! Good idea!
[11:24] yu
    Okay...
[11:35] haru
    No good?
[11:37] haru
    Monster...
[11:39] haru
    is coming to town?
[11:44] go
    Is something wrong?
[11:47] haru
    R-Rather than the sing-a-long...
[11:49] aki
    I think Yumoto-kun's right...
[11:51] both
    We should exchange presents first!
[11:55] both
    Now, quickly!
[11:56] both
    Before he comes!
[11:58] at
    Who?
[11:59] both
    Oh... nothing...
[12:01] en
    We don't have a choice.
[12:03] en
    If they want it that badly, maybe
    doing that first will calm them down.
[12:06] yu
    All right!
[12:07] both
    Yes!
[12:09] at
    There's something strange about those two.
[12:12] io
    I wonder if Christmas
    makes them a little crazy.
[12:18] en
    Okay, let's get started.
[12:20] yu
    I'm so excited!
[12:22] both
    The only present we want...
[12:24] both
    is that one!
[12:26] tawa
    Well, then. Christmas present exchange.
[12:29] tawa
    Let's start the music.
[12:33] yu
    Th-That sound...
[12:36] all
    Now?!
[12:38] rein
    Even on Christmas Eve, we labor and toil.
[12:41] rein
    I come on behalf of all those
    forced to work without rest...
[12:44] rein
    Ole!
[12:45] rein
    I am Red-Nosed Reindeer Monster!
[12:49] yu
    Reindeer Monster?
[12:50] ryu
    What's he doing here now?
[12:56] en
    Hey, what do we do?
[12:58] ryu
    We definitely can't transform here...
[13:01] at
    I wish these monsters could
    time their appearances better.
[13:04] yu
    Seriously!
[13:05] io
    What do we do?
[13:07] wom
    Since there are people here right now,
[13:09] wom
    you'll just have to transform outside.
[13:12] rein
    Hey!
[13:14] rein
    Are you guys ignoring me?
[13:17] go
    It really is a reindeer!
[13:22] rein
    Huh?
[13:24] go
    Here, have some.
[13:27] rein
    Oh...
[13:28] rein
    Thanks?
[13:29] haru
    Oh, dear...
[13:30] haru
    What do we do?
[13:31] aki
    There's only one thing to do.
[13:34] both
    We'll have to let them beat him!
[13:37] at
    But how do we get out of here?
[13:40] yu
    We could all say we gotta pee!
[13:42] en
    It would seem unnatural for us
    all to do that at the same time.
[13:45] ryu
    What about brushing our teeth, then?
[13:47] io
    Even more unnatural!
[13:48] haru
    That's it!
[13:50] haru
    You all just had cake...
[13:53] aki
    So why don't you go over there...
[13:54] both
    ...and brush your teeth?
[13:56] yu
    Huh?
[13:57] yu
    That might let us all brush our
    teeth in the most natural way!
[14:00] wom
    Then take the invitation
    and get going already!
[14:03] mon
    Hold on a minute!
[14:05] mon
    You want to shove all the work
    on me and run off, do you?
[14:10] mon
    I won't let you have all the fun
    on Christmas Eve without me!
[14:15] yu
    No, it's not like that!
[14:16] mon
    Oh, yes it is!
[14:19] mon
    Stupid Christmas Eve!
[14:21] mon
    Stupid Christmas parties!
[14:23] mon
    You get to have fun toasts and
    eat cake and exchange presents...
[14:27] mon
    and gaze at each other
    in a nice restaurant
[14:29] mon
    with a beautiful night view and
    a champagne glass in one hand...
[14:32] mon
    Then you flash the girl your hotel room keys
[14:35] mon
    and say "I got us a room"
[14:37] mon
    and then go up in the elevator together
[14:40] mon
    and then... and then...
[14:42] mon
    So lucky!!
[14:44] en
    What is that reindeer talking about?
[14:47] at
    No idea.
[14:48] io
    Well, it's a reindeer-eat-reindeer
    world out there.
[14:51] io
    He probably has a lot of troubles.
[14:53] at
    Wait, are reindeer carnivores or herbivores?
[14:56] mon
    We're omnivores with a
    strong herbivorous bent!
[14:59] mon
    But that's not the point!
[15:00] mon
    I'm trying to tell you that
[15:02] mon
    while you're happily
    enjoying yourselves here,
[15:04] mon
    there are people out there working
    their antlers off! You hear me?
[15:07] mon
    On Christmas, all the
    reindeer in the world...
[15:11] go
    Yes!
[15:12] go
    The reindeer bring presents
    to people all over the world!
[15:15] go
    You truly do magnificent work.
[15:18] go
    Want another drink?
[15:21] go
    I'll bring it to you.
[15:23] mon
    Well, don't trouble yourself...
[15:30] haru
    I know!
[15:31] haru
    Why don't we close our eyes for no reason?
[15:35] aki
    What a good idea!
[15:38] en
    Huh?
[15:39] en
    Those guys just started
    meditating or something...
[15:43] at
    That's weird.
[15:44] yu
    But that gives us our chance to transform!
[15:47] sign
    That's right!
[15:47] wom
    That's right!
SIGN    Time to Love Making!!
[15:48] wom
    Time to Love Making!
[15:52] yu
    Love Making!
[15:55] mon
    Hey, you twins!
[15:57] mon
    Are you trying to close your eyes to the
    fact that I'm working on Christmas Eve?
[16:03] yu
    Oh...
[16:04] wom
    Drat.
[16:05] wom
    We almost had it!
[16:07] go
    I'm sorry for the wait.
[16:09] go
    Take one.
[16:09] mon
    Th-Thanks...
[16:11] haru
    Darn it.
[16:13] haru
    We managed to create our
    most annoying monster yet.
[16:16] aki
    But unless the Defense Club beats him...
[16:20] both
    We won't be able to exchange presents!
[16:23] yu
    Oh, what's with this feeling
    of unrealized anticipation?!
[16:25] yu
    I wanna exchange presents already!
[16:27] io
    Then we need to defeat the monster first!
[16:31] wom
    Let's brainstorm ideas for how
    you can leave and transform!
[16:35] ryu
    I know.
[16:36] ryu
    What if one of us pretends
    to have stomach pain,
[16:38] ryu
    and the others take him to the hospital?
[16:41] yu
    Great idea! I'll play the sick one.
[16:44] en
    But I doubt the twins will buy it...
[16:47] wom
    We'll just have to try it!
[16:50] wom
    Action, I say!
[16:52] yu
    Oh, how awful!
[16:55] yu
    It hurts!
[16:56] yu
    My stomach does hurt so much!
[16:59] ryu
    Yumoto!!!
[17:00] ryu
    Are you okay?!?
[17:02] haru
    What is this?
[17:03] haru
    Yumoto-kun, your stomach hurts, you say?
[17:06] aki
    That is truly awful!
[17:08] both
    You must take him to the
    hospital immediately!
[17:10] en
    They bought it?
[17:12] at
    Are you kidding me?
[17:12] both
    Come on, everyone!
[17:14] both
    This way!
[17:15] go
    Wait, Yumoto!
[17:17] go
    I made your big brother's
    special tummy tonic.
[17:21] yu
    I know, but I need to go to the hospital...
[17:24] go
    Yumoto.
[17:25] go
    Ah!
[17:27] yu
    Ah...
[17:30] en
    I wish he'd butt out.
[17:32] io
    No kidding.
[17:34] mon
    Hey, you guys!
[17:36] mon
    What kind of stupid fake
    performance was that?
[17:40] yu
    Well, it's all your fault, Mr. Reindeer!
[17:44] yu
    You're ruining our Chri-pa!
[17:46] both
    That's right!
[17:48] haru
    After so long, we got invited to a Chri-pa...
[17:50] aki
    With that man...
[17:52] both
    ...we've always admired!
[17:54] aki
    Um, the point is...
[17:56] haru
    Because of you, a dream we've
    held since childhood...
[17:59] both
    Is down the drain!
[18:01] mon
    H-How could you...
[18:03] mon
    You're telling me all you care about
    is whether you get to have fun?
[18:08] mon
    Isn't it that selfish attitude
[18:10] mon
    that has turned Christmas
    Eve into the circus it is?
[18:14] mon
    Listen.
[18:15] mon
    Your happiness always comes
    on the back of someone else.
[18:15] ryu
    Oh boy, they got him going again.
[18:19] mon
    Behind all the fun you're having,
[18:21] mon
    there's always someone working their
    fingers to the bone and crying!
[18:24] mon
    You could never understand the
    suffering and sorrow we go through!
[18:28] all
    Huh?
[18:29] mon
    And yet no one ever stops to thank you.
[18:32] mon
    They just complain that you're
    late, that the food is cold...
[18:35] mon
    What do I even do it for?
[18:38] mon
    You know, I... I...
[18:41] mon
    I want a Chri-pa, too!
[18:43] yu
    Then have one!
[18:45] yu
    You can join us, Mr. Reindeer.
[18:48] yu
    When things get bad, you
    should try to join in the fun!
[18:52] mon
    I can... join in the fun?
[18:54] yu
    Yeah.
[18:55] yu
    You can have a fun Chri-pa with us!
[18:59] mon
    Me, at a Chri-pa?
[19:01] mon
    Me, having fun?
[19:04] gora
    Come along.
[19:06] both
    So nice!
[19:09] mon
    Thank you so much!
[19:12] mon
    Ole!
[19:12] mon
    I'll enjoy the Chri-pa!
[19:14] yu
    That's the way!
[19:19] taw
    It's time for the Chri-pa highlight
    you've all been waiting for,
[19:22] taw
    the present exchange.
[19:24] yu
    Yeah!
[19:28] aki
    At last!
[19:30] haru
    Yes...
[19:31] taw
    Now, everyone.
[19:32] taw
    Fetch your presents.
[19:34] yu
    Right!
[19:35] taw
    Now, let us begin.
[19:38] taw
    Start the music!
[19:52] taw
    Stop.
[19:57] mon
    Ole!
[19:58] mon
    My first ever present...
[20:02] at
    I see.
[20:04] at
    I get it.
[20:05] at
    That's why he did it...
[20:11] en
    That was some Chri-pa.
[20:14] ryu
    Yeah, it was something.
[20:16] io
    "Something" may be the
    only way to describe it.
[20:20] yu
    I really had a ton of fun!
[20:23] yu
    My brother was really happy, too!
[20:26] en
    By the way, what presents did you get?
[20:29] io
    I got this from Yumoto.
[20:31] yu
    Yeah, that's a Wom-san,
    made from Wom-san's fur!
[20:36] ryu
    This is the Christmas ramen that
    Reindeer Monster had with him.
[20:40] ryu
    Though the noodles have gotten soggy
    and soaked up all the broth...
[20:43] en
    I got that.
[20:45] ryu
    Oh, that's from me!
[20:47] ryu
    It's a blizzard rose that never wilts!
[20:49] en
    Hey, anybody want this?
[20:53] io
    What about you, Kinugawa-senpai?
[20:56] at
    I got this!
[20:58] yu
    It's from the student council!
[20:59] en
    Yeah, they sent it to the
    Defense Club yesterday.
[21:02] io
    Seeing the three of them
    dressed up like Santa...
[21:04] ryu
    They must be having a good time over there.
[21:08] at
    Looks like it!
[21:10] io
    By the way, what about the Beppu Brothers?
[21:13] haru
    This happiness, we must...
[21:16] aki
    ...share it between us.
[21:18] both
    Because that's what Christmas is all about!
[21:21] haru
    Yes.
[21:21] haru
    This is...
[21:22] aki
    What we've longed for for so long...
[21:25] both
    Gora-san's warmth!
[21:27] yu
    I got this!
[21:29] yu
    It's a hand-knitted sweater
    from the Brothers!
[21:32] yu
    It's nice and warm!
[21:34] en
    Hand-knitted? That's kind of stalker-ish.
[21:36] at
    And there's a heart on it...
[21:38] wom
    By the way, I was so busy playing the music,
[21:42] wom
    I forgot to join the game!
[21:45] en
    That's right. What happened to that monster?
[21:47] ryu
    He got the candy-filled Christmas
    stocking from Kinugawa-senpai
[21:51] ryu
    and left looking really happy.
[21:53] io
    I don't think we've ever let a monster
    get away without turning him back before.
[21:58] yu
    But I just couldn't bring myself
    to attack him like that!
[22:02] yu
    He was having so much fun!
[22:04] en
    Well, that's all right.
[22:06] en
    Everyone's happy.
[22:08] en
    And it's Christmas Eve.
[22:09] at
    Yeah.
[22:11] io
    I guess Christmas really
    does make people crazy.
[22:14] wom
    Yes!
[22:15] wom
    It's a Christmas Eve miracle!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is Like the Snow
[24:02] en
    Next time: Love is Like the Snow.
[24:04] en
    Love Making!
[24:06] ---
    

Season 2

8 - Love is Like the Snow

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] mon
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] all
    --
[00:00] both
    --
[00:09] en
    I never knew Yumoto's brother made soba.
[00:13] at
    So he can do more than just chop wood.
[00:15] yu
    Yeah!
[00:17] yu
    Today we'll eat Gora's
    hand-made New Year's soba,
[00:20] yu
    then listen to the New Year's bell
[00:21] yu
    and make our first shrine visit
    of the new year together!
[00:23] yu
    Then we'll watch the first sunrise
[00:26] yu
    and eat our New Year's feast together...
[00:29] yu
    I'm looking forward to it so much!
[00:32] en
    What are you talking about?
[00:33] en
    Once I'm out of this bath, I'm
    eating soba and heading home.
[00:36] at
    Same here.
[00:37] yu
    Huh? Senpais, you're just going home?
[00:40] io
    I'm going, too.
[00:41] io
    For the New Year, I always visit a shrine
    to Benzaiten to pray for my stocks to go up.
[00:45] ryu
    I'm going to the daruma fair with some girls.
[00:48] at
    The daruma fair?
[00:49] ryu
    We were supposed to go snowboarding,
[00:52] ryu
    but it's so cold it got to be
    more trouble than it was worth.
[00:54] en
    Speaking of which, didn't we have plans
    to go skiing during winter break?
[00:59] io
    Yes.
[01:00] io
    Though sadly we had to cancel because Yumoto
[01:03] io
    couldn't save up enough allowance.
[01:05] yu
    I tried really hard,
[01:08] yu
    but I just couldn't seem to save it up!
[01:10] at
    What is your allowance, anyway?
[01:12] yu
    500 yen per month!
[01:13] all
    Are you a child?!
SIGN    Love is Like the Snow
[02:57] yu
    Everyone's going home after the soba...
[02:59] yu
    it's gonna be a lonely New Year...
[03:01] en
    What's the big deal?
[03:03] en
    Go on your first shrine visit with Gora.
[03:05] at
    That's right.
[03:06] at
    Make it a brother thing.
[03:07] ryu
    Yeah!
[03:09] ryu
    Wouldn't that be a nice way
    to kick off the year, Yumoto?
[03:12] yu
    Just me and Gora?
[03:16] yu
    Yeah, good idea!
[03:17] yu
    Okay!
[03:18] yu
    Then after we eat the soba,
[03:20] yu
    me and my bro will go for
    our first shrine visit...
[03:22] yu
    and watch the first sunrise
    of the New Year together!
[03:24] haru
    What?
[03:26] haru
    Yumoto doesn't just get to eat
    Gora-san's New Year's soba...
[03:29] aki
    ...he gets to spend the first shrine visit
    and first sunrise of the New Year alone with him?
[03:32] haru
    Such an active and marvelous New Year.
[03:34] haru
    We will...
[03:35] both
    ...never let it happen!
[03:41] (Flashback) haru
    He doesn't get the day off
    off, even on New Year?
[03:44] (Flashback) aki
    The Andromeda calendar isn't like Japan's.
[03:49] (Flashback) aki
    Let's watch CIDE and wait, Haru.
SIGN    Due to a cosmic storm, your scheduled programming will not be seen today
[03:52] ann
    Due to a cosmic storm, your scheduled
    programming will not be seen today.
[03:57] ann
    Andromeda Ramen Battle!!
[03:58] [SONG] sign
    Andromeda Ramen Battle!!
[04:02] (Flashback) haru
    You're kidding me!
[04:03] (Flashback) haru
    How can the broadcast be canceled?
[04:08] dada
    Hey, you two.
[04:09] dada
    Could you help me get ready
    for the mochi-pounding?
[04:11] dada
    It's really hard doing it alone!
[04:13] haru
    Dadacha.
[04:14] haru
    We'll do the mochi-pounding later.
[04:17] haru
    First, we're going to ruin
    their New Year's soba!
[04:21] haru
    Then we're going to unveil the special New
    Year's gift we've been holding in reserve!
SIGN    Tomorrow's Weather
[04:27] man
    It'll be cold, but clear
    skies all over Japan.
[04:30] yu
    Hey, the Pink Song Battle is about to start!
[04:35] en
    What are you talking about?
[04:37] en
    On New Year's Eve,
[04:39] en
    you have to watch "Classic Japanese
    Melodies to End the Year."
[04:41] ryu
    Huh?
[04:43] ryu
    Don't you watch the "Don't Get Mad" series?
[04:46] ryu
    It's ending this year, you know!
SIGN    The World Ham Walk
[04:49] at
    No, on New Year's Eve you're
    supposed to put in a DVD!
[04:52] io
    No, since the markets are closed for the day,
[04:55] io
    my New Year's tradition is getting
    fired up watching martial arts!
[05:05] wom
    Earth New Year's Eve is filled with
    so many different kinds of love!
SIGN    Gokaku Cram School
SIGN    Jinzou Makoto
[05:19] kid
    This spring, we'll be in art school!
[05:21] kid
    We just have to buckle down
    for New Year's, that's all.
[05:23] kid
    We've gotta get into college
    on our first try, right?
[05:32] aki
    Haru.
[05:33] aki
    I see a good one.
[05:34] haru
    Yeah.
[05:40] haru
    Hey, Senpai.
[05:42] kid
    Senpai?
[05:43] haru
    Yes, we're students at Binan
    High School, just like you.
[05:48] kid
    Oh... r-really?
[05:51] aki
    Although we have very little in
    common with a 23-year-old senpai
[05:55] aki
    who's spent five years failing
    to get accepted into college.
[05:59] kid
    H-How did you know that?
[06:01] haru
    Senpai, really.
[06:03] haru
    You think "I'm actually a genius
    who will change the world"
[06:08] haru
    or something, don't you?
[06:10] haru
    Yet they won't acknowledge your
    genius, so you just continue failing.
[06:17] haru
    Even your parents are fed up with you.
[06:18] haru
    You borrow money to go to cram schools with
    no hope of ever paying back your debts.
[06:23] aki
    And yet you think it's all the fault of the
    people refusing to accept you into college.
[06:29] kid
    Yeah, that's right!
[06:31] kid
    It's not my fault I've been
    rejected for five years!
[06:34] kid
    The university people just don't
    appreciate my shining art talent!
[06:38] kid
    If I keep failing, my debts
    will just keep snowballing...
[06:42] kid
    I'm never going to escape this winter.
[06:47] haru
    So, why not show them that shining talent?
[06:50] aki
    You want to draw
[06:52] aki
    an incredible picture that will
    change the whole world, don't you?
[07:02] ryu
    We gotta watch Classic Japanese
    Melodies for New Year's, huh?
[07:04] io
    We decided with rock paper
    scissors. What can you do?
[07:07] en
    His vibrato is the best.
[07:12] ryu
    After we eat, I'm going home.
[07:14] ryu
    Yumoto, when's the soba coming?
[07:15] yu
    Bro Gora just put it in the
    water, so it'll be done soon!
[07:18] yu
    Is this kotatsu a little cold?
[07:21] at
    I'm gonna get a chill from the bath.
[07:22] wom
    Then let's set it to maximum!
[07:26] io
    The heater doesn't seem to
    be working well, either.
[07:29] ryu
    Here's what I do at times like this!
[07:31] ryu
    Toasty!
[07:32] yu
    Hey, that's ours!
[07:34] yu
    Bro Gora's gonna be so mad!
SIGN    Do Not Remove
    Kurotama Bath
[07:36] yu
    It says "Do not remove"!
[07:39] ryu
    Then how about this?
[07:42] all
    Toasty!
[07:44] gora
    Yumoto, it's done.
[07:46] yu
    Yeah!
[07:47] gora
    I'll bring the stew by later.
[07:49] gora
    Eat them before they get soggy, everyone.
[07:51] all
    Let's eat!
[07:54] haru
    Here's your first mission...
[07:56] both
    Snowman Monster!
[08:11] yu
    What happened?
[08:12] io
    It seems to be a power outage.
[08:15] haru
    Hey, the power went out
    before we even did anything.
[08:18] en
    Yumoto, where's the flashlight?
[08:20] yu
    I'm looking for it!
[08:22] ryu
    That's my leg!
[08:24] at
    That's my head!
[08:25] io
    Really.
[08:26] io
    This is why you should have a disaster
    readiness kit, just in case.
[08:34] yu
    Hey, it's back on!
[08:36] yu
    Great!
[08:37] en
    Not great.
[08:39] en
    The song is over.
[08:41] at
    Too bad, huh, En-chan?
[08:43] io
    Anyway, let's eat our soba before the
    power goes out again, then get going.
[08:49] io
    They're soggy...
[08:52] aki
    They used that power outage to
    take the wind out of our sails!
[08:55] haru
    Even more unforgivable!
[08:57] both
    Go, Snowman Monster!
[09:03] mon
    The land is my canvas!
[09:05] mon
    I'll paint it in my image!
[09:15] mon
    My canvas!
[09:18] man
    Thank you very much!
[09:19] dragon
    On New Year's, eat mochi, mochi, mochi!
[09:20] en
    Okay,
[09:21] en
    I'd better get going.
[09:23] en
    Thanks for the meal, Yumoto.
[09:25] at
    I think I'll head home, too.
[09:27] yu
    Huh?
[09:27] yu
    You're really leaving?
[09:29] io
    It's about time for me, too.
[09:31] ryu
    And me.
[09:33] all
    Well, see you!
[09:35] all
    Have a happy New Year!
[09:37] en
    Huh?
[09:39] en
    It won't open!
[09:42] ryu
    Yumoto.
[09:43] ryu
    Did you lock the door so we couldn't leave?
[09:45] yu
    Of course not!
[09:51] en
    What's with all this snow?
[09:52] at
    It wasn't coming down at all before...
[09:55] io
    And the weather forecast said it would
    be clear skies all over the country...
[10:01] aki
    They won't be able to get out.
[10:03] haru
    Now we'll send them the present
    we've been holding onto.
[10:06] haru
    Snowman Monster, third mission!
[10:13] io
    Looks like we'll be having
    New Year's at Yumoto's house.
[10:16] at
    Yeah, there's just too much snow.
[10:20] yu
    Ten seconds to the new year!
[10:24] yu
    Five!
[10:25] yu
    Four!
[10:26] yu
    Three!
[10:27] yu
    Two!
[10:28] yu
    One!
[10:29] yu
    Happy New Year!
[10:35] snow
    Happy Snow Year!
[10:37] yu
    A snowman!
[10:41] mon
    I'm Snowman Monster!
[10:43] mon
    To celebrate the new year,
    I'll paint you in my image!
[10:46] en
    Close the freaking window,
    it's cold out there!
[10:48] ryu
    Yeah, c'mon.
[10:49] ryu
    It's cold.
[10:51] mon
    Hey!
[10:52] mon
    A monster just showed up!
[10:54] mon
    Come on!
[10:54] mon
    Stand up and fight!
[10:56] en
    Can't you give us New Year's off?
[10:57] at
    There's no way we can fight
    in this cold. No way.
[11:00] ryu
    I can't leave the kotatsu.
[11:01] ryu
    I will not.
[11:02] yu
    Wom-san's all curled up
    under the kotatsu, too!
[11:05] io
    Working the New Year's
    holiday demands a pay bump.
[11:08] io
    And it's currently midnight,
[11:09] io
    so we'd need a late night bonus, too...
[11:12] mon
    Oh no!
[11:13] wom
    Don't go to any trouble.
[11:15] en
    Then it's settled.
[11:16] en
    We're taking the holiday off.
[11:18] at
    It's decided.
[11:21] all
    Cheers!
[11:24] aki
    I bet they've all been
    turned into snowmen by now.
[11:29] haru
    Take that, Yumoto!
[11:31] haru
    Take that, Defense Club!
[11:33] dada
    Go on, eat your New Year's stew!
[11:36] mon
    I can't tell them I went
    home without getting them to fight me...
[11:41] mon
    What do I do?!
SIGN    Beppu Akihiko Born August 21st Blood Type AB / Leo Hobbies: Calligraphy, Flute Likes: Rice balls
[12:00] dada
    First calligraphy of the year, and...
[12:02] dada
    New Year's decorations?
[12:04] haru
    The new year must be greeted with beauty.
[12:06] aki
    I'm writing our New Year's resolutions.
[12:10] mon
    What do I do? What do I do?
[12:12] mon
    I know.
[12:13] mon
    I'll get them before they realize...
[12:17] gora
    "I never know how to write
    the 'Yu' in 'Yufuin.'"
[12:20] at
    Here!
[12:21] all
    He's so fast!
[12:22] en
    He got another one!
[12:24] at
    En-chan, you still only have three?
[12:26] en
    So what if I do?
[12:27] yu
    I've got three, too!
[12:29] ryu
    I haven't gotten a single card yet.
[12:32] ryu
    I'm a shoo-in for the punishment.
[12:33] wom
    As am I.
[12:35] wom
    It's the short arms that do it.
[12:38] io
    So the third member
[12:40] io
    of the designated shopper team will
    either be Yufuin-senpai or Yumoto.
[12:50] gora
    Hakone's—
[12:51] all
    Me! Me me me!
[12:56] gora
    —feels good.
[12:56] yu
    I did it!
[12:59] at
    So the punishment falls
    to En, Ryuu, and Wom-san.
[13:04] yu
    Hey, bad news!
[13:06] yu
    Mr. Tawarayama's frozen over!
[13:10] en
    Hey.
[13:11] ryu
    Yeah?
[13:12] en
    What's the deal with dominos?
[13:15] en
    They make no sense.
[13:17] ryu
    In the end, you just knock them all over.
[13:19] ryu
    I don't get the motivation behind it.
[13:22] wom
    The enjoyment comes
[13:23] wom
    from the thrill of accomplishment at
    seeing something through together—
[13:27] en
    Yeah, there's none.
[13:29] ryu
    Speaking of, I don't get the motivation for
    being on those male cheer squads, either.
[13:33] ryu
    They're supposed to be encouraging people!
[13:34] en
    Yeah, guys in big jackets clapping on a
    3-3-7 beat doesn't really do it for me.
[13:39] wom
    It's a tradition overflowing
    with manly spirit,
[13:41] wom
    the bonds of male friendship,
[13:43] wom
    and other such wonderful...
[13:45] mon
    If they won't fight me, I'll
    bring the fight to them!
[13:57] ryu
    Speaking of things I don't understand,
    what's with the way girls go shopping?
[14:04] yu
    One, and... two!
[14:07] yu
    I win!
[14:09] at
    I'm so sick of this.
[14:11] io
    We've done karuta, fukuwarai,
    and top-spinning.
[14:14] io
    This is the game we're stuck with.
[14:16] en
    Skipping makes no sense to me, either.
[14:18] ryu
    Yeah, I hear you!
[14:20] ryu
    You just bounce up and down,
    barely moving forward at all!
[14:24] en
    It also makes you more
    likely to trip and fall.
[14:26] wom
    I think it's a full-body expression of that
[14:29] wom
    whoop-de-doo, pitter-patter,
    zing-zing feeling in your heart!
[14:33] en
    Whoop-de-doo, pitter-patter, zing-zing...
[14:36] en
    I haven't had a lot of that lately.
[14:38] ryu
    Same.
[14:39] ryu
    It's all been hurgh and brrr for me lately.
[14:42] mon
    If you want whoop-de-doo,
    pitter-patter, zing-zing that bad,
[14:45] mon
    I'll give it to you!
[14:47] mon
    Snow, snow, snow, blizzard!
[14:53] ryu
    Senpai!
[14:54] ryu
    Skipping is great, huh?
[14:56] ryu
    Even though it's a blizzard,
    I'm having tons of fun!
[14:58] en
    Yeah!
[14:59] en
    Why did I reject it for so long?
[15:02] en
    It's a crime that only kids do it!
[15:04] wom
    I feel utterly whoop-de-doo,
    pitter-patter, zing-zing!
[15:08] mon
    The attack's not working at all!
[15:10] mon
    In that case, time for the "Slip and Fall in the Snow
[15:13] mon
    That Encompasses College Entrance
    Exam-Takers Nationwide" Attack!
[15:19] en
    It's slippery here.
[15:20] en
    Be careful.
[15:45] ryu
    I haven't had a pitter-patter zing-zing
    feeling like this in a while.
[15:48] en
    Yeah,
[15:49] en
    I guess we used to do stuff
    like that every day, huh?
[15:53] yu
    Senpai!
[15:55] yu
    Let's go!
[15:59] at
    I'm starting to forget which
    side got the punishment.
[16:04] at
    You know?
[16:04] io
    Yes.
[16:07] yu
    I did it!
[16:09] at
    Yeah, you did!
[16:10] io
    Then let me show you what
    happens when I get serious!
[16:18] gora
    Hey, you're all playing!
[16:22] gora
    Hey now, big brother's going
    to get serious now, too!
SIGN    Get within five meters of Gora-san.
SIGN    Make eye contact with Gora-san five times.
[16:32] aki
    This is a true ward against evil.
[16:37] gora
    Why, you!
[16:39] both
    That voice!
[16:50] haru
    That sweater!
[16:51] aki
    That's the Gora-san sweater
    we stayed up all night
[16:55] aki
    knitting for Gora-san!
[16:57] both
    Unforgivable!
[16:59] haru
    What is that Snowman Monster doing?
[17:02] dada
    What's all the fuss?
[17:04] aki
    Dadacha, call Snowman
    Monster back here at once!
[17:07] dada
    G-Got it!
[17:11] en
    Why is it totally clear here?
[17:13] ryu
    It looks like the snow clouds are completely
    focused on the Kurotama Bath area.
[17:17] wom
    Just a day into the new year and
    things are already getting strange...
[17:22] mon
    I couldn't beat them.
[17:24] mon
    I suppose it's time for an artful suicide...
[17:26] dada
    What are you doing here?!
[17:28] dada
    Get back there and fight them!
[17:30] at
    That was surprising.
[17:32] at
    Io, you know a lot about building igloos.
[17:34] yu
    I'm surprised you knew how
    to stack up the blocks!
[17:38] io
    To be honest, when I was a child,
[17:41] io
    I was known as "Igloo Maker Naru."
[17:44] ryu
    We're back!
[17:46] ryu
    Hey, an igloo!
[17:47] yu
    Igloo Maker Naru gave it his all!
[17:51] yu
    Okay, everyone get inside!
[17:54] yu
    Huh?
[18:02] mon
    My leg!
[18:03] mon
    It hurts, darn it!
[18:06] at
    What now?
[18:07] en
    We told you, we're not working today.
[18:11] mon
    If you won't fight...
[18:15] mon
    Then I'll destroy the igloo you built
[18:17] mon
    and make it into a snowman!
[18:20] yu
    You can't!
[18:21] yu
    Igloo Maker Naru worked hard on that!
[18:24] mon
    Then fight me!
[18:26] wom
    You have no choice!
[18:27] wom
    It's the first Love Making of the new year!
[18:31] yu
    Love Making!
[18:37] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[18:40] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[18:43] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[18:44] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[18:47] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[18:49] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[18:52] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[18:54] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[18:57] ryu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[18:59] ryu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[19:01] en
    This love-filled planet will
    not abide those who lack love!
[19:05] ryu
    Those who wield loveless
    power must kneel before love!
[19:09] io
    Love is power!
[19:10] io
    Love is hope!
[19:12] atsu
    Be born for love!
[19:14] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[19:16] yu
    Love!
[19:16] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[19:20] five
    Battle Lovers!
[19:21] yu
    Feel the power...
[19:23] five
    Of love!
[19:27] mon
    You could never understand...
[19:29] mon
    How it feels to keep rolling like a snowball,
[19:32] mon
    then to melt without ever seeing spring.
[19:35] mon
    The same thing, year after year...
[19:39] mon
    The feelings of a snowman
[19:42] mon
    who can never escape winter...
[19:47] yu
    But everyone loves snowmen.
[19:50] yu
    They make our hearts feel
    like warm and toasty spring.
[19:53] mon
    Warm and toasty spring?
[19:55] yu
    As long as you live in everyone's hearts,
[19:58] yu
    even a snowman can see spring.
[20:02] mon
    I can see spring, too?
[20:05] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[20:20] yu
    Love is over!
[20:27] yu
    Hey, it really was sunny
    out, just like spring!
[20:31] wom
    When it's New Year, spring's not far away!
[20:34] yu
    Getting to spend both New Year's Eve
    and New Year's Day with you guys
[20:36] yu
    and my brother is a great
    sign of things to come!
[20:39] yu
    I'm so grateful to that monster!
[20:41] both
    What?!
[20:43] haru
    Even looking on the bright
    side has its limits!
[20:45] haru
    Being grateful for a monster?!
[20:47] aki
    What have we been doing wrong?
[20:50] aki
    No...
[20:50] aki
    the real question is, what
    is wrong with Hakone Yumoto?
[20:53] aki
    If even this doesn't get the point through...
SIGN    Lucky
    Sweet Sake
    Free
[21:01] yu
    It's hot!
[21:02] yu
    But delicious!
[21:04] en
    I don't know how you can drink that.
[21:06] en
    You can still taste the rice
    grains. I can't stand it.
[21:08] ryu
    Same here!
[21:09] ryu
    Senpai, we're pretty in sync this year!
[21:11] en
    No, we're not.
[21:14] at
    So, En-chan, what did you wish for?
[21:18] en
    For the kind of year where I
    can spend every day skipping.
[21:21] at
    Huh?
[21:27] ryu
    That's the guy...
[21:29] io
    I hope he finds his spring this year.
[21:43] yu
    Brothers-senpai!
[21:44] yu
    Happy New Year!
[21:45] haru
    How dense can you get?
[21:47] aki
    How have you not realized it?
[21:49] yu
    Realized what?
[21:50] haru
    Don't play dumb!
[21:52] haru
    We're the ones who have been
    sending monsters after you!
[21:57] aki
    Don't you get it yet?
[21:59] aki
    We, the brothers, are...
[22:09] both
    The twin stars shining in the heavens!
[22:11] haru
    Salty Sol!
[22:13] aki
    Melty Luna!
[22:16] both
    Galaxy Idols: The VEPPer!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    The Chemical Substance of Love
[23:54] ryu
    Next time: "The Chemical Substance
     of Love!"
[23:57] ryu
    Love Making!
[23:58] ---
    

Season 2

9 - The Chemical Substance of Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] en
    --
[00:00] wom
    --
[00:00] yu
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:07] haru
    Dammit...
[00:09] both
    Damn that Defense Club!
[00:11] (Flashback) aki
    How have you not realized it?
[00:13] (Flashback) yu
    Realized what?
[00:15] (Flashback) haru
    Don't play dumb!
[00:16] (Flashback) haru
    We're the ones who have been
    sending monsters after you!
[00:22] (Flashback) aki
    Don't you get it yet?
[00:23] (Flashback) aki
    We, the brothers, are...
[00:26] (Flashback) both
    Galaxy Idols: The VEPPer!
[00:33] haru
    They've ignored us since New Year...
[00:36] haru
    that's a month and a half!
[00:38] aki
    Unforgivable.
[00:39] aki
    We revealed our secret...
[00:41] aki
    we gave them the shock
    of a lifetime, and yet...
[00:45] haru
    We identified ourselves explicitly,
SIGN    Grr grr grr grr
[00:47] haru
    yet they didn't say a
    single word in response...
[00:49] haru
    Are they mocking us?!
[00:51] aki
    What they're doing isn't even mocking us.
[00:54] aki
    I think they don't even care about us at all.
[00:57] haru
    Unforgivable!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[01:00] yu
    Oh yeah!
[01:01] yu
    Did you know?
[01:03] yu
    Tomorrow's Valentine's Day!
[01:05] en
    Oh, I totally forgot.
SIGN    Oden
    Warm and Fluffy!
[01:07] en
    But I'm sure Atsushi will
    be giving me something.
[01:09] at
    Something? You mean chocolate, right?
[01:12] at
    Speaking of forgetting things,
[01:15] at
    are you sure we shouldn't be doing
    something about the Beppu Brothers?
[01:18] ryu
    Yeah, they were all...
[01:20] ryu
    "Galaxy Idol the VEPPer,"
    or something, right?
[01:25] io
    We've ignored them for a month and a half.
[01:27] io
    It's a little late to comment on it now.
[01:29] yu
    I'm just glad we know where
    the monsters are coming from!
[01:34] at
    Yeah, that's true.
[01:36] wom
    That the Beppu Brothers are creating monsters
[01:39] wom
    is an alarming problem in itself!
[01:41] en
    Yeah, those two don't really seem
    like the type to just drop it...
SIGN    The Chemical Substance of Love
[03:29] yu
    What's with those helicopters?
[03:31] gora
    They seem to be carrying chocolate.
[03:33] yu
    Wow!
[03:34] yu
    They're getting that much chocolate?
[03:37] haru
    Another year, another
    enormous pile of chocolate.
[03:40] aki
    Eating it all would be fatal.
[03:43] aki
    Finding ways to dispose of it all
    every year is not an easy task.
[03:45] yu
    Galaxy Idols The VEPPer sure are a cut above!
[03:49] gora
    Galaxy Idols?
[03:50] yu
    Yeah, that's what they called themselves!
[03:55] yu
    Bro?
[03:57] gora
    Oh, Yumoto.
[03:59] gora
    I made chocolate breakfast gruel.
[04:03] yu
    Wow! Great!
[04:05] yu
    Looks delicious!
[04:07] gora
    You should eat it while it's still hot.
[04:09] gora
    It's got barley and rice.
[04:10] yu
    Thanks, Bro!
[04:15] aki
    That's the Gora we know.
[04:17] aki
    Barley chocolate is delicious.
[04:19] aki
    That means chocolate barley rice
    gruel must be delicious, too.
[04:23] haru
    Dammit!
[04:23] haru
    I want it!
[04:25] haru
    If not for Hakone Yumoto...
[04:29] aki
    Why don't we get rid of him?
[04:31] aki
    They've ignored us for a month and a half...
[04:35] haru
    This time, at last, we'll
    settle things with them.
[04:39] dada
    Yeah!
[04:40] dada
    Let's beat 'em!
[04:41] both
    Valentine's Day will be the
    day Hakone Yumoto dies.
[04:51] ryu
    Io, did you bring any paper bags?
[04:53] ryu
    I'll probably get more by
    the time school's over.
[04:55] ryu
    I can't carry it all.
[04:57] io
    I thought this might happen, so I
    arranged for a truck to come by.
[05:01] io
    I'll send you the bill later, of course.
[05:03] ryu
    That's the Io I know!
[05:05] ryu
    Just find a way to get
    me out of the bill, okay?
[05:07] ryu
    I'll give you chocolate!
SIGN    Io
[05:10] io
    I'm getting plenty of chocolate from
    the candy companies I own stock in.
[05:15] io
    But I'll take it, if you're offering.
[05:18] ryu
    I wonder if you'll be the one ending
    up with the most chocolate.
[05:24] en
    This is delicious!
[05:25] at
    Right?
[05:26] at
    I tried to cut back on
    the sweetness this year.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[05:35] yu
    You mean it just showed up?
[05:38] at
    It looks like very expensive wrapping.
[05:40] ryu
    Yeah...
[05:42] io
    The message is handwritten, too.
[05:44] en
    Who's it addressed to?
[05:46] wom
    Anyway, why don't we open it?
[05:48] wom
    There might be a letter or something inside!
[05:51] en
    Are you sure we should be doing this?
[05:52] yu
    I'm sure!
[05:54] yu
    I wanna eat chocolate!
[06:01] en
    What?
[06:02] en
    So it's to all of us?
[06:04] io
    The cards are hand-written, and
    the bouquets are all different...
[06:08] ryu
    But there's none for Wom-san.
[06:10] wom
    Yes, that is certainly a shame.
[06:13] en
    So what do we do with them?
[06:15] at
    Not eat them, that's for sure.
[06:16] at
    We don't even know who it's from.
[06:19] ryu
    That's right!
[06:21] ryu
    We've got plenty of other
    stuff to eat anyway.
[06:23] io
    And nothing is more terrifying than "free."
[06:26] yu
    But that would be rude to the
    person who gave it to us!
[06:28] yu
    I'm gonna try it!
[06:30] ryu
    Idiot! Don't do that!
[06:33] yu
    Delicious!
[06:34] yu
    This chocolate is really delicious!
[06:37] yu
    But...
[06:38] ryu
    What's wrong, Yumoto?
[06:42] haru
    I bet they're crying about now.
[06:45] aki
    They need to learn that life
    isn't all wine and roses.
[06:49] haru
    You do have a good idea
    from time to time, Dadacha.
[06:51] dada
    I'm honored by your compliment!
SIGN    Dark chocolate
SIGN    Endorphins
[06:54] dada
    Dark chocolate causes the brain to release
    neuropeptides known as endorphins,
SIGN    Brain
[07:00] dada
    which produce feelings of happiness
    and stimulate the mind.
[07:02] dada
    At the same time, it also
    raises the heart rate.
[07:06] dada
    I've fused that with capsicum extract using
    my highly advanced scientific technology...
[07:12] dada
    If they eat it, they'll end up
    so stimulated and high on joy,
[07:16] dada
    their combat prowess will be diminshed!
[07:20] dada
    And that's how it works!
[07:22] aki
    Well, we don't really care about that...
[07:24] haru
    But this time, we'll crush the Defense Club!
[07:27] haru
    And in the process, rid
    ourselves of Hakone Yumoto!
[07:29] aki
    That super-spicy chocolate will
    be but a minor entertainment
[07:32] aki
    before we crush Hakone Yumoto.
[07:34] aki
    And we'll drive the rest of the Battle
    Lovers to destruction in the process.
[07:37] haru
    Yes.
[07:38] haru
    We've found a lot of good
    monster candidates this time.
[07:47] yu
    But I feel kind of excited and good!
[07:51] yu
    Time for a cuddlefest!
[07:57] yu
    And...
[07:59] yu
    I want to cuddle you senpai, too!
[08:02] yu
    Senpai...
[08:03] yu
    I love you!
[08:05] ryu
    No way!
[08:06] at
    There's something definitely
    weird in that chocolate...
[08:09] en
    Anyway, we'd better run.
[08:10] io
    Good idea!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[08:11] yu
    Senpai!
[08:15] yu
    Senpai! Where are you?
[08:18] yu
    En-chan-senpai?
[08:19] at
    Hey, he singled you out.
[08:21] yu
    Found you!
[08:23] yu
    You always act so indifferent,
[08:25] yu
    but I know you really care
    about us, En-chan-senpai!
[08:28] yu
    I love you for it!
[08:30] at
    He confessed his love while cuddling him...
[08:32] io
    Just hearing it is embarrassing.
[08:35] ryu
    Yumoto's got passion.
[08:36] en
    Yumoto! Atsushi's right there! There!
[08:38] at
    En-chan!
[08:39] io
    Selling out his friend?
[08:40] yu
    Yeah! Atsushi-senpai!
[08:40] at
    Hey, Yumoto, calm down!
[08:43] yu
    Atsushi-senpai, I think you're the
    reason the Defense Club exists!
[08:47] yu
    You're like a mom, but I think you
    secretly have a dark side, too!
[08:52] yu
    I love that about you!
[08:53] at
    Stop it!
[08:54] en
    Well, that sucked.
[08:56] ryu
    You know, Senpai, you sold
    out your best friend.
[08:59] en
    Atsushi would have done the same thing.
[09:01] io
    I can't deny it.
[09:02] at
    Yumoto, that's enough.
[09:04] at
    Look. Ryuu's right there!
[09:05] ryu
    Are you kidding me?!
[09:06] yu
    Ryuu-senpai...
[09:06] ryu
    I'm outta here!
[09:09] yu
    You say you love girls,
[09:12] yu
    but I know you treasure us most of all.
[09:17] yu
    And I love you too, Ryuu-senpai!
[09:20] ryu
    Cut it out!
[09:21] en
    Is it just my imagination,
    or is Ryuu enjoying this?
[09:24] io
    I can't look directly at it.
[09:26] at
    But you're up next, Io.
[09:27] yu
    Io-senpai!
[09:28] io
    No, I believe I'll pass!
[09:31] yu
    Io-senpai, I know you value money,
[09:34] yu
    but you value the love we
    share the most! I love you!
[09:39] io
    I-I get it! So please, stop it!
[09:41] ryu
    Io's not used to that kind of thing.
[09:44] at
    Yeah, he's red as a beet.
[09:46] en
    What are we gonna do about this?
[09:48] wom
    I just investigated,
[09:49] wom
    and those chocolates
[09:50] wom
    have the chemical substance
     capsicum inside them!
[09:55] wom
    We just have to wait for
    his excitement to wear off!
[09:57] en
    So when will it wear off?
[10:00] wom
    I'm afraid I don't know...
[10:03] yu
    Come on, let's have another cuddle party!
[10:08] yu
    Senpai, wait for me!
[10:13] haru
    It's all going as planned, I see.
[10:15] aki
    How are you feeling, Hakone Yumoto?
[10:17] aki
    Amazing, right?
[10:19] yu
    Yeah, just amazing!
[10:21] haru
    He's stupid.
[10:22] haru
    He's far too stupid.
[10:23] aki
    How could someone like him
    get Gora-san all to himself?
[10:27] ryu
    Does that mean you're the guys who
    sent us those weird chocolates?
[10:32] haru
    Yeah, that's right!
[10:33] haru
    Because you're in our way, to be honest!
[10:35] aki
    How dare you ignore our declaration
    of war for a month and a half!
[10:40] aki
    Today, at last, we're going to eliminate you!
[10:43] aki
    From the universe itself!
[10:47] shu
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[10:51] en
    What the heck?
[10:52] at
    What's with this song?
[10:53] shu
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[10:57] shu
    On the name of the stars!
[11:07] shu
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[11:13] shu
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[11:15] both
    The twin stars shining in the heavens!
[11:17] shu
    On the name of the stars!
[11:18] haru
    Salty Sol!
[11:19] aki
    Melty Luna!
[11:22] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[11:28] aki
    Let me be frank.
[11:29] aki
    We find you unacceptable as
    rivals for idols like us.
[11:32] haru
    In other words, we hate your guts!
[11:35] haru
    In particular...
[11:36] both
    Hakone Yumoto!
[11:37] yu
    Huh?
[11:38] yu
    What was that?
[11:40] aki
    If not for you...
[11:42] haru
    ...he would be ours...
[11:45] aki
    Knowing that you're idols like us
[11:48] aki
    really gets under our skin!
[11:50] yu
    Huh? Idols like you?
[11:53] aki
    Hakone Yumoto.
[11:54] aki
    You must disappear from this
    world... from this universe!
[11:58] haru
    That goes for all of you!
[11:59] haru
    Let's go, Battle Lovers!
[12:02] both
    It's time for an idol showdown!
[12:04] en
    Hey, they're talking about idols again.
[12:07] at
    What does that even mean?
[12:08] ryu
    Well, I'm an idol, at least...
[12:11] io
    I can say with confidence
    that I am not an idol.
[12:15] wom
    But what we do know
[12:17] wom
    is that the VEPPer are the
    ones sending the monsters!
[12:20] wom
    We should probably fight...
[12:22] en
    Sure, but it doesn't seem like
    they're trying to destroy Earth
[12:24] en
    or humanity like the
    Conquest Club from before.
[12:28] en
    I say we ignore them.
[12:29] at
    Yeah, ignore them.
[12:31] ryu
    Agreed.
[12:31] io
    We're not making any money off it, so...
[12:33] en
    Well, so long!
[12:37] aki
    S-Stop it!
[12:38] aki
    What are you thinking?
[12:39] haru
    Dammit!
[12:40] haru
    Stop that! It feels so good!
[12:42] dada
    I think we'd better send a monster!
[12:44] aki
    First, get us out of here!
[12:46] dada
    Okay! Fluffhugger!
[12:49] yu
    I can't see!
SIGN    Beppu Haruhiko Born August 21st Blood Type AB / Leo Hobbies: Bonsai, Gardening, Horseback Riding Likes: Rice balls
[12:58] haru
    Listen, you lot.
[12:59] haru
    You're our loyal followers, aren't you?
[13:02] all
    Yes!
[13:03] aki
    And what's more, you've never once
    received chocolate from anyone.
[13:08] all
    Yes!
[13:10] haru
    Then show your love for us
[13:12] haru
    by turning those years of resentment
    into hatred for the Battle Lovers!
[13:18] aki
    They get lots of chocolate!
[13:21] aki
    Possibly even more than we did!
[13:24] aki
    Hate them!
[13:25] aki
    Because our own hatred
    of them is irrepressible!
[13:28] all
    Yes!
[13:30] both
    We and our apes are as one!
[13:35] aki
    Then let us...
[13:36] haru
    ...grant your wish!
[13:44] haru
    Lucky you!
[13:45] haru
    Open your eyes!
[13:47] haru
    Happy you!
[13:48] haru
    Open them wide!
[13:50] haru
    You won't want to miss it...
[13:53] haru
    The big bang of love, dreams, and light!
[13:59] haru
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    blooming in the galaxy!
[14:06] haru
    Moon and sun, miracles and secrets
[14:07] both
    The twin stars shining in the heavens!
[14:09] haru
    Salty Sol!
[14:09] haru
    We're the stars making wishes come true!
[14:10] aki
    Melty Luna!
[14:12] haru
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[14:13] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[14:17] both
    Chosen warriors!
[14:19] haru
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[14:19] haru
    Lucky you!
[14:21] aki
    Happy you!
[14:22] haru
    On the name of the stars!
[14:24] both
    Shooting...
[14:25] both
    Star!
[14:35] aki
    Now we just have to send them to bust
    up that perverted Hakone Yumoto...
[14:38] aki
    and the rest of the Defense Club.
[14:41] haru
    We'll bury them in chocolate.
[14:45] both
    Eat too much chocolate
    and suffer the cavities,
[14:48] both
    Hakone Yumoto and allies!
[14:51] yu
    Senpai!
[14:53] yu
    I wanna cuddle more!
[14:57] yu
    The True Lovracelet...
[14:59] at
    I guess a monster must have appeared.
[15:00] en
    At a time like this?
[15:02] ryu
    And we can't even handle Yumoto...
[15:04] io
    Is it even okay for Yumoto to
    transform in the state he's in?
[15:09] wom
    Regardless, everyone!
[15:10] wom
    Let's Love Making!
[15:13] yu
    Love Making!
[15:41] yu
    The Sparkling Prince!
[15:43] yu
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[15:46] en
    Love Making.
[15:57] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[15:59] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[16:01] atsu
    Love Making.
[16:11] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[16:13] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[16:16] io
    Love Making.
[16:26] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[16:28] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[16:31] ryu
    Love Making!
[16:41] ryu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[16:43] ryu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[16:47] en
    This love-filled planet
[16:49] en
    will not abide those who lack love!
[16:51] ryu
    Those who wield loveless power
[16:53] ryu
    must kneel before love!
[16:55] io
    Love is power!
[16:56] io
    Love is hope!
[16:58] atsu
    Be born for love!
[16:59] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[17:01] yu
    Love!
[17:02] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[17:05] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:07] yu
    Feel the power...
[17:09] five
    of love!
[17:12] aki
    This is our final battle!
[17:14] haru
    Get ready, Battle Lovers!
[17:17] both
    And Hakone Yumoto!
[17:19] at
    Looks like they have a
    particular hatred of Yumoto.
[17:22] en
    This is so annoying.
[17:24] en
    Can't we just run away?
[17:26] at
    Yeah.
[17:27] at
    I don't see any reason why we should fight...
[17:29] ryu
    I've got preparations to make
    for my Valentine's dates.
[17:32] io
    I'm interested in checking the
    stocks for my candy companies.
[17:36] yu
    No!
[17:37] yu
    We can't just let the
    monsters stay like that!
[17:41] yu
    I'm gonna save them all
    with the power of our love!
[17:44] en
    Oh, hell.
[17:45] en
    Yumoto's getting into it.
[17:46] at
    How about we just let him
    take point this time?
[17:49] ryu
    I'm in!
[17:50] io
    No objections here.
[17:51] wom
    But, everyone!
[17:52] wom
    You're not going to fight?
[17:54] en
    I have no reason to fight.
[17:56] at
    This whole idol showdown thing is beyond me.
[17:58] yu
    Okay!
[17:59] yu
    Everyone who wants a cuddle, gather 'round!
[18:03] ryu
    What the heck?
[18:04] wom
    I'm sure he has a plan!
[18:06] yu
    Hey! Come here!
[18:08] yu
    Gather 'round!
[18:10] yu
    Come on!
[18:11] yu
    My wellspring of love never stops gushing!
[18:15] en
    Is it okay to let this happen?
[18:17] at
    There are quite a lot of monsters...
[18:19] ryu
    Looks like trouble.
[18:20] io
    It would be hard to take them all alone...
[18:24] yu
    Okay, let's get going!
[18:26] yu
    A drop of love for each of you!
[18:29] en
    A new technique?
[18:30] at
    Yumoto's got a real flair for the dramatic.
[18:32] ryu
    I can't watch.
[18:34] io
    I wonder where he learned that.
[18:36] yu
    Go flying, Love Sprinkle!
[18:41] en
    Yep, it's a new technique.
[18:43] wom
    Even I never expected a technique like this!
[18:51] mon
    What is this feeling?
[18:52] mon
    Strange but enjoyable!
[18:54] mon
    I don't know what it is,
    but it makes me happy!
[18:59] haru
    What the hell is that?
[19:00] aki
    Those love-starved monsters...
[19:03] aki
    It's like feeling love for the
    first time has addled their minds.
[19:06] dada
    This is a very bad development!
[19:06] yu
    Love is good!
[19:08] yu
    It feels so good!
[19:10] yu
    Now everyone, wallow in the love!
[19:15] mon
    Let's support him!
[19:15] mon
    Let's all support that red angel!
SIGN    LOVE
[19:19] all
    Red angel! Cha-cha-cha!
[19:21] all
    Red angel! Cha-cha-cha!
SIGN    Wave Your Hands
[19:22] en
    Red angel?
[19:23] ryu
    I think they mean Yumoto...
[19:25] at
    They seem to really love him.
[19:27] io
    It's a bit creepy, but I can feel it.
[19:29] haru
    What are they doing?
[19:31] aki
    Their chants make no sense.
[19:34] aki
    They're idiots, start to finish.
[19:36] en
    That's enough, Yumoto.
[19:36] yu
    Thanks, everyone!
[19:37] en
    You're too pleased with yourself.
[19:39] at
    Yumoto!
[19:41] at
    Use the True Love Fountain already!
[19:44] yu
    Okay!
[19:45] yu
    Everyone, accept my love!
[19:48] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[20:03] yu
    Love is over!
[20:08] boy
    That kid's pretty cute!
[20:10] boy
    He looks like an idol!
[20:14] dada
    Haru-chan, Aki-chan!
[20:15] dada
    I think it's time you stepped in!
[20:18] aki
    Yes.
[20:20] aki
    I can't stand to look at this
    disgusting sight anymore.
[20:23] haru
    Hakone Yumoto really is unforgivable!
[20:26] haru
    Hey!
[20:26] haru
    It's not over yet!
[20:28] aki
    We're going to fight you!
[20:31] yu
    But I don't wanna fight!
[20:33] yu
    I wanna cuddle with you again, VEPPer-san!
[20:36] both
    Silence!
[20:37] haru
    Unlucky you!
[20:39] aki
    Unhappy you!
[20:41] haru
    Take our resentment...
[20:43] aki
    ...and be grateful to get it!
[20:45] both
    Deadly...
[20:48] yu
    Cuddle!
[20:51] aki
    This is so humiliating!
[20:52] haru
    Shut up! Stop it!
[20:55] aki
    I can't take it, Haru!
[20:56] aki
    Let's pull back for now!
[20:57] haru
    Yeah, I can't take it!
[20:59] yu
    But wait!
[21:02] yu
    They left.
[21:04] yu
    Okay, Senpai!
[21:06] yu
    Please let me cuddle you!
[21:14] en
    It's no use.
[21:15] at
    Isn't there any way to snap him out of it?
[21:18] ryu
    Let's take him to the bath! The bath!
[21:19] io
    That's a fine idea!
[21:23] en
    Come on, Yumoto!
[21:24] yu
    What's going on!?
[21:30] yu
    I wanna cuddle more...
[21:33] go
    What's wrong, Yumoto?!
[21:35] en
    Sir, Yumoto's been acting strangely
[21:36] en
    since he ate some chocolate
    the Beppu Brothers gave him.
[21:40] go
    What?!
[21:47] go
    Be strong, Yumoto!
[21:49] go
    Snap out of it!
[21:51] yu
    Huh?
[21:52] yu
    Why am I in the bath with you, bro?
[21:55] go
    You're all right now.
[21:56] go
    I'm so glad you're safe.
[21:57] yu
    Huh?
[21:58] en
    As always, Gora-san brings
    the serious brotherly love.
[22:02] ryu
    But what's up with those Beppu Brothers?
[22:04] at
    They were firing off some kind
    of move or something, right?
[22:09] io
    They gave themselves that weird name, too.
[22:11] io
    I guess there's more to
    them that meets the eye.
[22:13] wom
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer...
[22:17] wom
    We cannot ignore them!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Days of Love and Acclaim
[23:54] io
    Next time: "Days of Love
    and Acclaim!"
[23:57] io
    Love Making!
[23:58] ---
    

Season 2

10 - Days of Love and Acclaim

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] both
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] en
    --
[00:00] ryu
    --
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[00:08] yu
    Mornin'...
[00:09] all
    Heya.
[00:09] io
    Good day.
[00:15] en
    There's something you don't see every day...
[00:17] at
    What is it?
[00:18] en
    Yumoto just sighed!
[00:20] all
    What?
[00:20] all
    No way!
[00:21] yu
    What?
[00:23] yu
    I can sigh sometimes, too...
[00:25] en
    Can not.
[00:26] at
    Yeah, you can't.
[00:27] ryu
    Can't.
[00:28] io
    You cannot.
[00:29] wom
    What happened?
[00:31] wom
    Does it have anything to do with VEPPer?
[00:33] yu
    No, I don't care about that.
[00:36] en
    Wombat's been getting more careless with
    how he treats Mr. Tawarayama lately.
[00:40] io
    I believe he's always been that way.
[00:42] ryu
    So rude to a dead person.
[00:44] wom
    He is not dead!
[00:46] wom
    He's just in sleep mode!
[00:47] ryu
    What is he, a computer?
[00:49] at
    So why are you sighing, Yumoto?
[00:54] yu
    Something important to me is going away.
[00:56] io
    Something important to you?
[00:58] en
    Not Wombat?
[01:00] at
    I'm curious.
[01:01] at
    What is it?
[01:02] ryu
    This isn't a sex thing, is it?
[01:04] io
    Why are you asking so nervously?
[01:07] yu
    It's not a sex thing!
[01:08] yu
    It's Binan Land!
[01:10] yu
    They're tearing it down!
[01:13] all
    Oh.
[01:16] yu
    What kind of hum-drum reaction is that?!
[01:18] at
    I just haven't heard that name in so long.
[01:22] io
    He's right.
SIGN    Notice About Closing of Binan Land
SIGN    To all our regular patrons, we must regrettably cease operations. We thank you for your loyal devotion all these years. Binan Land Staff
[01:24] io
    It says Binan Land is closing
    at the end of the month.
SIGN    Binan Land
    Bringing You Tons of Fun!
[01:28] ryu
    Well, go figure.
[01:30] ryu
    I don't know a single couple who went
    there that didn't break up afterwards.
[01:33] en
    That's your standard?
[01:35] ryu
    Well, if you're going on a date, it's
    gotta be that You-Know-What-land or Sea.
[01:39] at
    That's their brand. Young or old,
    boy or girl, anyone can enjoy it.
[01:43] en
    But Binan's just got the
    sad old ferris wheel,
[01:46] en
    the sad kid's coaster, and that's about it.
[01:49] ryu
    And that other thing!
[01:50] ryu
    The sad little merry-go-round!
[01:52] io
    Wait a minute.
[01:54] io
    It says they did a hero show at one point, too.
[01:57] en
    Seriously?
[01:58] io
    But "they were so scary, they stopped
    after one performance," it says.
[02:03] ryu
    What's there to be scared of in a hero show?
[02:05] en
    And they only held one?
[02:09] at
    So you have a choice between sad or scary?
[02:11] at
    What a meeting of extremes!
[02:12] yu
    You're all so mean, Senpai!
[02:14] yu
    Stop calling it sad!
[02:16] wom
    Binan Land...
[02:18] wom
    There's something familiar about that name...
[02:21] ryu
    You don't have to humor him.
[02:23] io
    This is how the world works.
[02:25] io
    Consider it an education.
[02:27] yu
    You stupid-dupid numbat senpai!
[02:34] io
    Were we too hard on him?
[02:35] ryu
    He did say it was important to him...
[02:38] en
    Just what is a numbat, anyway?
[02:40] at
    Maybe he meant dingbat?
[02:42] ryu
    Is a dingbat even a real thing?
[02:45] io
    He could have also meant
    nimrod or numbskull, too.
[02:48] at
    I see.
[02:50] at
    Yumoto quality.
[02:51] en
    Either way, we were probably too hard on him.
[02:54] all
    Yeah...
[02:57] wom
    Binan Land...
[03:00] wom
    I'm just sure I've heard that name...
[03:01] ryu
    I told you, forget it!
SIGN    Days of Love and Acclaim
[04:40] haru
    Stupidity might be the
    strongest thing there is.
[04:43] aki
    What I really can't stand is
SIGN    Foolish
[04:45] aki
    how astronomically lame they
    are compared to Gora-san.
[04:49] haru
    You're so right.
[04:50] haru
    I'd like them to disappear
    without a single particle remaining.
[04:53] jun
    I hate lame things, too.
SIGN    Junya Entaro
[04:59] jun
     It's an honor to be here.
[05:00] jun
    That reminds me.
[05:01] jun
     Binan Land is finally closing, you know?
[05:05] jun
    That place was just the lamest, right?
[05:08] jun
    It never changed or improved,
    just gathered rust.
[05:11] jun
    I'm so glad it's going away!
[05:21] haru
    Did you just call Binan Land lame?
[05:23] aki
    You're the one who doesn't understand!
[05:26] haru
    We're going to teach you...
[05:28] aki
    ...the wonders of Binan Land.
[05:34] yu
    Those senpai of mine are just the worst!
[05:37] gora
    Binan Land?
[05:38] gora
    I had a rough time there...
[05:41] yu
    Huh?
[05:41] yu
    Bro, you're down on it, too?
[05:44] gora
    Goodness, I nearly burned to death.
[05:47] yu
    At Binan Land?
[05:49] gora
    Though, looking back,
     it's become a good memory.
[05:56] all
    Yumoto-kun!
[05:58] all
    We're very sorry!
[06:00] all
    Let's go play!
[06:03] yu
    We're here! We're here!
SIGN    Last Day
[06:04] yu
    It's Binan Land! Yay!
[06:06] en
    He sure is excited.
[06:07] at
    You're not excited enough, En-chan.
[06:10] yu
    But are you sure you want
    to pay my entry fee?
[06:13] at
    We're splitting your ticket,
    so it's only 480 yen each.
[06:17] yu
    480 yen?!
[06:19] yu
    That's a lot of money!
[06:20] en
    Just take it.
[06:21] yu
    Thanks!
[06:23] yu
    I thought this might happen,
[06:25] yu
    so Bro made me some Bomb Rice Balls!
[06:29] yu
    When you go to an amusement park,
    you need ones with pickled plums,
[06:31] yu
    tuna mayo, bonito flakes, hard-boiled egg,
[06:33] yu
    fried chicken and vinegar-miso onions!
[06:35] en
    I thought I heard one in there I
    should really be objecting to...
[06:40] yu
    It's good!
[06:41] en
    Well, forget it.
[06:44] en
    There's something pretty depressing
    about a trip to the amusement park
[06:47] en
    with a bunch of guys.
[06:49] ryu
    Oh, really?
[06:50] ryu
    I find it refreshing.
[06:52] io
    It would be for you, Ryuu.
[06:56] at
    It's the last day,
    but there aren't many people...
[06:59] en
    Really?
[07:00] en
    Isn't this standard?
[07:02] io
    What ride should we start with?
[07:04] at
    That's right.
[07:05] at
    We want rides, not attractions.
[07:07] yu
    Oh! This one!
[07:08] yu
    The Mad Mouse!
[07:09] yu
    I rode this one seven times, then barfed!
[07:12] yu
    I recommend it!
[07:13] en
    You're sure it wasn't
    the vinegar-miso onions?
[07:15] at
    Why would you ride it until you barf?
[07:17] yu
    The Mad Mouse is more hard core
    than your standard roller coaster!
[07:28] yu
    See? Hard core, right?
[07:30] io
    Once was enough for me.
[07:32] io
    You did it seven times?
[07:33] ryu
    I can't believe you survived it.
[07:35] yu
    Well, after I barfed,
[07:38] yu
    Bro laid me down on a bench, and...
[07:41] yu
    And what happened after that?
[07:44] en
    What's wrong, Yumoto?
[07:49] (Flashback) gora
    I'm sorry, Yumoto.
[07:52] (Flashback) gora
    I should have stopped you
    before it got so bad.
[07:54] (Flashback) yu
    It's okay.
[07:56] (Flashback) yu
    I just got too excited.
[08:02] (Flashback) gora
    Yumoto, I'm sorry.
[08:07] (Flashback) yu
    What's wrong, big bro?
[08:10] (Flashback) yu
    Can you wait here a while by yourself?
[08:12] (Flashback) yu
    Y-Yeah.
[08:13] (Flashback) gora
    You're sure you'll be okay?
[08:15] (Flashback) yu
    Yeah.
[08:17] (Flashback) yu
    I'll be okay!
[08:18] (Flashback) gora
    Okay.
[08:19] (Flashback) gora
    I'll be back soon!
[08:26] yu
    Huh?
[08:27] yu
    When did he come back?
[08:29] yu
    I don't remember him coming back...
[08:31] ryu
    But if he didn't come back,
    he wouldn't be here now, right?
[08:34] yu
    That's true...
[08:37] yu
    All I have is the memory of feeling
    kind of anxious and lonely...
[08:41] io
    Well, that axe was clearly
    cause for concern, wasn't it?
[08:46] at
    Hey.
[08:46] at
    Do you think that CIDE
    thing Gora-san mentioned...
[08:50] wom
     Everyone!
[08:54] wom
    Everyone!
[08:56] wom
    You must Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[09:01] io
    Hey, the Doppler effect.
[09:03] en
    You used to see that in tokusatsu and stuff.
[09:06] en
    Scenes where they're screaming and you're like
    "where are you even supposed to be yelling from?"
[09:09] at
    We don't have a choice.
[09:10] at
    Let's go, too!
[09:12] all
    Yeah!
[09:17] mon
    I'm tired of spinning around
    and around in the same place!
[09:24] mon
    The limited track.
[09:25] mon
    The pre-designated movements.
[09:26] mon
    The days of oppression.
[09:28] mon
    I've had enough of it!
[09:32] en
    Well, he has a point.
[09:33] at
    I know how he feels.
[09:35] mon
    Don't act like you understand!
[09:38] yu
    Love Making!
[09:42] yu
    Love!
[09:43] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[09:46] five
    Battle Lovers!
[09:48] yu
    Feel the power...
[09:50] five
    ...of love!
[09:52] yu
    Let's go!
[09:54] yu
    Scarlet Love Lumiere!
[09:58] mon
    W-Wait a minute!
[10:00] mon
    I have over 32 pages of detailed backstory!
[10:04] mon
    Are you sure you want to
    end this that quickly?
[10:08] yu
    Backstory is only effective when
    it's intertwined with the drama!
[10:11] yu
    All you're doing is padding the narrative!
[10:15] mon
    Th-That's cold...
[10:17] yu
    If you've got a problem,
[10:18] yu
    try changing yourself before
    resenting everything else!
[10:20] yu
    We can change the world!
[10:27] yu
    True Love Attack!
[10:39] yu
    True Love Fountain!
[10:56] yu
    Love is over!
[10:58] yu
    Okay!
[10:59] yu
    Let's Love Out and ride the Mad Mouse again!
[11:03] aki
    "We can change the world?"
[11:05] haru
    Stop stealing lines!
[11:08] en
    You two...
[11:11] both
    Galaxy Idols...
[11:13] both
    The VEPPer!
[11:17] aki
    You five are so uncooperative.
[11:20] haru
    Earth upbringing breeds poor taste.
[11:22] haru
    Or rather, no taste at all.
[11:24] aki
    That's right, I forgot.
[11:27] aki
    We must apologize.
[11:28] yu
    Um, VEPP-san...
[11:30] both
    It's VEPPer!
[11:33] yu
    VEPPer-san.
[11:35] yu
    VEPPer-san, you say you're really big idols,
[11:38] yu
    and I don't really understand, but okay.
[11:42] yu
    I also get that we're not
    even close to your level.
[11:47] haru
    What are you talking about?
[11:49] yu
    We're not trying to compete with you.
[11:52] yu
    So could you stop fighting us?
[11:54] yu
    I feel kind of bad for the people
    you turn into monsters, don't you?
[12:00] yu
    So if it might be possible...
[12:03] yu
    Couldn't we just get along from now on?
[12:09] en
    Yumoto, really...
[12:10] at
    Sorry to be harsh, but that's awful.
[12:12] yu
    Huh? How come?
[12:15] ryu
    Would you be happy hearing,
    "I won't date you, but can't we be friends"?
[12:18] io
    It's like saying, "the investment failed,
     so pay me back half the money."
[12:24] yu
    Huh?
[12:25] haru
    Hakone Yumoto...
[12:29] aki
    And the Defense Club...
[12:32] both
    We won't forget how you humiliated VEPPer!
[12:36] haru
    You want to get along?
[12:38] aki
    Isn't that funny?
[12:40] aki
    Haru, it is truly funny!
[12:42] haru
    We really want you to disappear!
[12:45] aki
    Without a trace or a memory left behind!
[12:50] at
    Wait a minute.
[12:52] at
    There's really just one
    question I want to ask you.
[12:56] at
    Why do you hate us in the first place?
[13:00] en
    You can't really hate someone
[13:01] en
    unless they're at least on your own level...
[13:09] both
    Maximum Gorar was a person who may
    have become a big brother to us!
SIGN    Dadacha Born December 24th (adjusting for Earth calendar) Blood Type B (probably) Capricorn Hobbies: Secret Favorite food: Crickets
[13:26] mon
    This is the end, Maximum Gorar!
[13:29] haru
    Gorar!
[13:30] aki
    Don't worry, Haru!
[13:32] aki
    Maximum Gorar never loses!
[13:34] haru
    Y-Yeah...
[13:35] haru
    Maximum Gorar is invincible!
[13:41] io
    Huh? M-Maxi...?
[13:44] ryu
    Who's that?
[13:45] yu
    That's Gora's hero name.
[13:47] ryu
    Huh?
[13:48] ryu
    The Beppu Brothers know Gora-san?
[13:50] io
    I'm not sure whether to object
[13:52] io
    first to the "may have become
    a big brother" line, or...
[13:55] wom
    Everyone!
[13:57] wom
    I feel I should explain!
[14:00] wom
    Until a while back, Earth played host
    to a battle of love and justice!
[14:06] wom
    The people watched this
    battle and called it...
[14:10] wom
    "Can I Destroy the Earth? 2"
SIGN    Can I Destroy the Earth? 2
[14:14] wom
    "2" of course means there was a "1"!
[14:18] yu
    That's my big bro!
[14:19] wom
    That's right!
[14:20] wom
    The man protecting the Earth
    was the ultimate warrior,
[14:23] wom
    Maximum Gorar!
[14:29] haru
    And we were here!
[14:31] aki
    Right here with Gora-san!
[14:36] dada
    This is taking too long!
[14:38] dada
    That's why I hate exposition episodes!
[14:42] dada
    Forced Memory Transfer!
SIGN    Binan Land First Hero Show
[14:50] (Flashback) mon
    To oblivion with this backwater planet!
[14:56] (Flashback) mon
    Are you not afraid of me?
[15:00] (Flashback) aki
    Well, there's a guy inside the suit, right?
[15:03] (Flashback) haru
    It's hard playing the villain
    in hero shows, huh, Mister?
[15:10] (Flashback) haru
    What is it?
[15:12] (Flashback) mon
    I like you!
[15:13] (Flashback) mon
    That sarcasm and cool-headedness.
[15:15] (Flashback) mon
    You would make fine henchmen for me!
[15:20] (Flashback) haru
    Stranger danger!
[15:21] (Flashback) aki
    Police!
[15:22] (Flashback) mon
    Too bad, Earthlings.
[15:24] (Flashback) mon
    I did my research, and found
    out that amusement parks
[15:26] (Flashback) mon
    are places where the existence
    of aliens is tolerated.
[15:31] (Flashback) haru
    Monsters aren't supposed to be that smart,
    you big brute!
[15:35] (Flashback) mon
    I'll teach you one more thing.
[15:37] (Flashback) mon
    Do you know why monsters always
    attack kindergarten buses?
[15:39] (Flashback) aki
    Because they're on TV shows for kids, right?
[15:42] (Flashback) aki
    Let us go!
[15:43] (Flashback) mon
    No.
[15:45] (Flashback) mon
    It's because young humans are
    the easiest to brainwash.
[15:48] (Flashback) mon
    Soon, I will make you worship me.
[15:51] (Flashback) haru
    Will not!
[15:53] (Flashback) aki
    Someone!
[15:53] (Flashback) aki
    This guy's not acting!
[15:55] (Flashback) haru
    Help us!
[16:02] (Flashback) mon
    Your screams are useless!
[16:04] (Flashback) mon
    No one can hear you!
[16:06] (Flashback) gora
     I'm disappointed in you!
[16:09] (Flashback) gora
    Seeing you attack young children!
[16:13] (Flashback) mon
    Maximum Gorar!
[16:19] (Flashback) gora
    Let those children go!
[16:22] (Flashback) mon
    Never!
[16:23] (Flashback) mon
    You're a mere thief,
    attempting to steal my prey!
[16:27] (Flashback) mon
    I will punish you!
[16:33] (Flashback) gora
    Wood-Chopping Beam!
[16:35] (Flashback) mon
    My, my.
[16:36] (Flashback) mon
    Are you sure you want to do that?
[16:37] (Flashback) mon
    Don't you care what happens
    to these little Earthlings?
[16:42] (Flashback) mon
    It seems you can't touch me
    as long as I have hostages.
[16:47] (Flashback) mon
    Today you die, Maximum Gorar!
[16:50] (Flashback) mon
    Take this!
[17:00] (Flashback) haru
    It's hot!
[17:01] (Flashback) haru
    Don't tell me...
[17:02] (Flashback) aki
    This is all real?
[17:13] (Flashback) mon
    Rest in peace, Maximum Gorar!
[17:17] (Flashback) both
    Gorar!
[17:18] (Flashback) both
    Wake up! You have to wake up!
[17:21] (Flashback) both
    Gorar, wake up!
[17:23] (Flashback) both
    Maximum Gorar!
[17:26] (Flashback) haru
    It can't be...
[17:27] (Flashback) aki
    I don't like this plot twist.
[17:29] (Flashback) mon
    It's no use.
[17:30] (Flashback) mon
    Your fate has been decided.
[17:32] (Flashback) mon
    You cannot change the world.
[17:34] (Flashback) mon
    Let's go!
[17:36] (Flashback) mon
    Next week, there will be a new twist!
[17:42] (Flashback) gora
    ...can change...
[17:46] (Flashback) gora
    We... can change... the world.
[17:51] (Flashback) mon
    He still has the strength to stand?
[17:54] (Flashback) gora
    We can change the world!
[17:56] (Flashback) mon
    What?
[17:58] (Flashback) hashi
    Gorar!
[17:59] (Flashback) hashi
    Use the Super Wood-Chopping Axe!
[18:08] (Flashback) gora
    Super Wood-Chopping Axe!
[18:18] (Flashback) haru
    Gorar! Thank you!
[18:20] (Flashback) aki
    Thank you so much!
[18:21] (Flashback) gora
    Thank you for cheering me on.
[18:23] (Flashback) gora
    Take care, you two.
[18:25] (Flashback) haru
    Huh? You're leaving already?
[18:27] (Flashback) gora
    I'm sorry, I have Yumoto...
[18:29] (Flashback) gora
    I mean, I have a child waiting for me.
[18:32] (Flashback) gora
    Take this.
[18:33] (Flashback) gora
    It's a Bomb Rice Ball.
[18:38] (Flashback) gora
    There's pickled plums, tuna mayo,
[18:39] (Flashback) gora
    bonito flakes, hard-boiled egg, fried chicken
[18:41] (Flashback) gora
    and vinegar-miso onions inside.
[18:45] (Flashback) gora
    Make mischief if you must.
[18:46] (Flashback) gora
    Just grow up big and strong!
[18:51] (Flashback) aki
    I wish he could stay with us forever...
[18:55] (Flashback) haru
    Yeah...
[19:01] yu
    Big bro...
[19:02] at
    Which means that long ago, Gora-san...
[19:04] ryu
    As Maximum Gorar...
[19:06] io
    ...saved the Beppu Brothers?
[19:11] en
    Wh-What did you say?!
[19:16] at
    Tradition, tradition!
[19:18] io
    We can't have a major plot twist
[19:20] io
    without Yufuin-senpai shouting
    "What did you say?!"
[19:24] ryu
    That was a great "What did you say?!", too!
[19:26] en
    Thank you tremendously for your praise.
[19:28] haru
    Ruining our great story with
    their snide comments...
[19:32] aki
    They were unworthy both to hear
[19:36] aki
    and know about our bond with Gora-san...
[19:39] yu
    Hey, VEPP Brothers-san.
[19:41] both
    It's VEPPer!
[19:43] yu
    VEPPer-san, I'm glad you
    like my brother so much,
[19:47] yu
    but you shouldn't hate my
    senpai because of that.
[19:51] ryu
    Wrong, Yumoto.
[19:54] ryu
    This is like a complicated
    in-law relationship.
[19:57] ryu
    "I like my husband, but
    I hate my mother-in-law,
[19:59] ryu
    and I hate my sister-in-law too."
[20:02] io
    The whole "may have been a big brother to us"
[20:04] io
    indicates a certain unhealthy attachment.
[20:07] io
    Ryuu, you're surprisingly
    proficient in psychology.
[20:10] ryu
    Hey, don't say "surprisingly."
[20:12] ryu
    Anyway, it's viscerally impossible
    for them to get along with us.
[20:16] ryu
    It defies logic.
[20:18] aki
    Could you please stop psychoanalyzing us?
[20:20] haru
    It's extremely aggravating, and creepy, too.
[20:23] en
    No, no.
[20:24] en
    I understand how you feel,
[20:26] en
    but that's no reason to pester us.
[20:29] at
    Yumoto and Gora-san are brothers.
[20:31] at
    That's a fact that can't be changed.
[20:33] en
    We may be the Battle Lovers,
[20:35] en
    but if you don't stop stalking us, we're
    willing to bring the authorities into this.
[20:39] at
    What do you mean?
[20:40] en
    Take them for arbitration or court,
    or get a restraining order, perhaps.
[20:45] wom
    Such graphic language from an
    heir to the throne of love!
[20:49] en
    If we can take this to a
    higher authority, we should.
[20:52] en
    All these battles are tiring me out.
[20:53] at
    And bringing in a third party
    should cut down on squabbling.
[20:59] at
    Okay, we'll do that.
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:21] yu
    I'm so tired.
[21:23] at
    I'm sorry your last big day at
    Binan Land was such a waste.
[21:28] yu
    Yeah...
[21:29] ryu
    Don't be so sad.
[21:30] ryu
    Memories are forever, right?
[21:32] io
    That's right.
[21:33] io
    Even all that nonsense today might
    turn out to be a good memory.
[21:36] io
    Maybe... possibly...
[21:39] ryu
    Not convincing.
[21:42] yu
    But yeah, you're right.
[21:44] yu
    Let's take a bath and cheer ourselves up!
[21:48] yu
    We're back, Bro Gora!
[21:51] yu
    Big bro?
[21:53] yu
    Huh?
[21:54] yu
    He'd usually come right out with his axe...
[22:01] en
    Gora-san disappeared with his
    wood-chopping pile unfinished?
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is What Matters
[23:54] ryu
    Next time:
    "Love is What Matters!"
[23:56] ryu
    Love Making!

Season 2

11 - Love is What Matters!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] yu
    --
[00:00] dada
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] trio
    --
[00:06] yu
    Big bro!
[00:08] all
    Gora-san!
[00:09] wom
    Gora-dono!
[00:11] en
    Yoo-hoo...
[00:13] en
    Doraemon...
[00:21] at
    Gora-san?
[00:25] at
    En-chan, what are you doing?
[00:27] en
    Oh, I thought it might
    have some sort of clue.
[00:31] en
    Yeah, I'm lying.
[00:32] en
    I just got curious.
[00:35] en
    But look at this. It's Yumoto.
[00:38] an
    Wow, he's tiny!
[00:39] an
    And Gora-san's so young!
[00:42] ryu
    What's all this?
[00:43] ryu
    Wow, you're right!
[00:44] ryu
    Yumoto hasn't changed at
    all! He's exactly the same!
[00:47] io
    And Gora-san looks like the
    quintessential big brother!
[00:53] yu
    Senpai. You need to take looking
    for my brother seriously!
[00:57] at
    Sorry, sorry.
[00:59] at
    This was all just so charming.
[01:01] en
    What is it about other people's
    albums that's so fascinating?
[01:05] yu
    Hey!
[01:05] yu
    What will happen to the Kurotama
    Bath if my brother disappears?!
[01:10] yu
    What will I do?
[01:12] yu
    If anything happens to my brother...
[01:16] en
    Don't you worry.
[01:18] en
    He'll be back.
[01:20] wom
    Let us put our faith in Maximum Gorar!
[01:23] at
    He's a legendary hero, remember?
[01:25] at
    He'll be fine!
[01:28] yu
    Big bro!
[01:30] yu
    Come home!
SIGN    Love is What Matters!
[02:19] (Flashback) aki
    You're being transferred
    to the Andromeda branch?
[02:22] (Flashback) dad
    Yeah.
[02:23] (Flashback) dad
    For three to five years.
[02:25] (Flashback) haru
    Is it a demotion?
[02:26] (Flashback) dad
    They said it'll come
    with a proper space wage.
[02:28] (Flashback) haru
    Will we have to change schools?
[02:30] (Flashback) aki
    What about your promise to take
    us to Binan Land next month?
[02:33] (Flashback) dad
    I'm sorry.
[02:35] (Flashback) dad
    But there'll be plenty of
    fun places in Andromeda.
[02:39] (Flashback) both
    But is there Binan Land?!
[02:51] (Flashback) haru
    We never even got to thank Gorar!
[02:57] (Flashback) both
    I hate Andromeda!
SIGN    Space School
[03:02] (Flashback) ali
    Earth?
[03:04] (Flashback) ali
    Where's that?
[03:05] (Flashback) ali
    Gotta be out in the sticks, right?
[03:06] (Flashback) ali
    Oh, I know.
[03:07] (Flashback) ali
    CIDE! That's where Gorar's from.
[03:10] (Flashback) haru
    You know Maximum Gorar?
[03:12] (Flashback) aki
    Why?
[03:13] (Flashback) ali
    That Gorar guy really gets under my skin.
[03:16] (Flashback) ali
    All he does is get in the way.
[03:18] (Flashback) ali
    Man, Earth sucks.
[03:19] (Flashback) ali
    I wish they'd bust it up soon.
[03:21] (Flashback) ali
    But they gotta get rid of Gorar first!
[03:24] (Flashback) ali
    Gorar's just a big doo-doo head!
SIGN    Teacher's Office
[03:28] (Flashback) ali
    Picking a fight over some silly TV show?
[03:33] (Flashback) haru
    Gorar's not a bad guy...
[03:35] (Flashback) aki
    Gorar's a hero!
SIGN    Beppu Haruhiko Beppu Akihiko
[03:59] (Flashback) haru
    This is stupid, right?
[04:01] (Flashback) aki
    Yeah, it's stupid.
[04:04] haru
    Gora-san...
[04:05] aki
    Gora-san...
[04:06] haru
    Isn't Gora-san charming?
[04:08] haru
    I want to tie him up and
    keep him beside me forever.
[04:11] aki
    I want to force a reluctant
    Gora-san to slap me.
[04:17] aki
    Tie him up?
[04:18] aki
    You mean Gora-san?
[04:19] haru
    Yeah.
[04:20] haru
    I don't want him running away.
[04:21] haru
    But... slap you?
[04:23] haru
    You want Gora-san to do that?
[04:26] aki
    Yeah.
[04:26] aki
    It sounds thrilling!
[04:28] haru
    Aki, you've got weird tastes!
[04:28] aki
    Haru, you've got strange tastes!
[04:32] both
    Gora-san...
[04:33] dada
    ...belongs to VEPPer forever!
[04:41] ari
    Kinshiro, how far have you gotten in
    your Shakespeare research project?
[04:45] kusa
    I finished last week.
[04:47] ari
    Seriously?
[04:48] ari
    I'd better hurry, too.
[04:49] ari
    Mr. Chips is so strict.
[04:51] gero
    You're so lucky.
[04:53] gero
    I'm doing Latin grammar right now.
[04:56] gero
    It's such a bother.
[04:57] kusa
    If you can learn Latin now,
    it will make things easier—
[05:01] ari
    What's wrong?
[05:03] kusa
    My shoelace broke.
[05:04] gero
    Oh, dear...
[05:05] ari
    Have you been looking after them?
[05:07] kusa
    Of course.
[05:09] kusa
    It's a bad omen.
[05:11] gero
    Hey, a black cat.
[05:16] gero
    Hey, cock robins.
[05:45] kusa
    Something awful is about to happen.
[05:47] ari
    Really?
[05:49] ari
    I think it's all in your head.
[05:50] kusa
    Not to me.
[05:53] kusa
    I feel like something bad's
    happening to At-chan.
[05:56] ari
    Really?
[05:57] ari
    If it's so bad you can't even
    eat, why not send him an email?
[06:02] kusa
    To send him an email...
    for no particular reason?
[06:05] ari
    Why not say, "Just felt like emailing
    you, no particular reason"?
[06:08] kusa
    What?
[06:09] kusa
    Can I do that?
[06:11] ari
    Why not?
[06:18] kusa
    I'll email him, then.
SIGN    Just felt like emailing you, no particular reason. How are things? -Kinshiro.
SIGN    Sent
SIGN    Kinugawa Atsushi
[06:24] [Messenger] sign
    Cell Phone
[06:26] kusa
    I hope he'll reply soon...
[06:39] ryu
    It's hard to relax without
    Gora-san's regular 'cha-chop'!
[06:44] wom
    Truly, we're missing the finishing touch!
[06:46] io
    I wonder when he'll be back.
[06:49] io
    If he's gotten mixed up
    with the Beppu Brothers...
[06:51] io
    I mean, VEPPer...
[06:53] ryu
    Yeah.
[06:54] ryu
    Maybe we should ask them directly?
[06:56] io
    That's tricky...
[07:00] en
    How'd it go?
[07:01] at
    No use.
[07:02] at
    Not a single sign of life.
[07:04] ryu
    I told you not to turn it
    on until it dried fully.
[07:08] at
    I thought it was! I used a hair dryer on it!
[07:12] io
    On the bright side, it didn't fall
    in after you'd done your business.
[07:17] at
    I didn't think I was so
    dependent on my smartphone,
[07:20] at
    but now I know how Yumoto feels.
[07:23] at
    You don't realize how important
    someone is until you lose them.
[07:29] en
    You're equating Gora-san with a smartphone?
[07:31] io
    Kinugawa-senpai's so traumatized,
[07:33] io
    he's lost all his usual social graces.
[07:35] ryu
    Yumoto forgot his cluelessness, too!
[07:37] yu
    What was that?
[07:42] dada
    Maximum Gorar is about to leave
    the Earth, never to return!
[07:48] dada
    Gorar is a space legend.
[07:50] dada
    For the sake of his fans and
    supporters who respect that legend,
[07:53] dada
    he's going to connect in
    friendship all over the cosmos
[07:56] dada
    as an eternal member of VEPPer!
[07:59] dada
    Heaven!
[08:00] en
    Yeah, I lost the thread there.
[08:01] en
    All the English threw me off.
[08:04] wom
    In other words, they're taking Hakone Gora!
[08:10] dada
    See you! Thank you! Bye!
[08:30] dada
    What are you doing?
[08:31] dada
    My office won't stand for this!
[08:34] ryu
    They're surprisingly flimsy.
[08:35] io
    Yeah.
[08:36] io
    They must get holes in them all the time.
[08:41] ryu
    Just one poke from any slightly
    pointy household utensil...
[08:44] ryu
    Chopsticks, for example...
[08:51] dada
    I-I-I'm sorry!
[08:54] at
    No need to apologize.
[08:56] en
    So? Is Gora-san with them?
[09:00] io
    And they're going back
    into space with Gora-san?
[09:05] ryu
    So what about the fight they
    were trying to pick with us?
[09:08] dada
    The original purpose of the fights
[09:09] dada
    was to make it clear who
    was more worthy of Gora-san!
[09:14] at
    Really?
[09:16] dada
    But they don't care anymore,
[09:19] dada
    as long as Gora-san joins VEPPer!
[09:23] [Messenger] sign
    Hakone Gora
    Born May 9th
    Blood Type O Taurus
    Hobbies: Chopping Wood
    Likes: His little brother
[09:30] haru
    Yeah, Gora really should
    be in the center, right?
[09:33] aki
    Yeah.
[09:34] aki
    Speaking of which, it'll
    usually be the three of us,
[09:38] aki
    but I was thinking of forming a new unit,
    just me and Gora, called "Go Lucky!"
[09:43] aki
    Gora + Aki = Go Lucky! Get it?
[09:45] haru
    What the heck?
[09:46] haru
    That's not fair! I want a unit, too!
[09:48] aki
    No!
[09:49] aki
    If we try to sell another unit
    with the same name scheme,
[09:52] aki
    it'll just dilute Gorar's value.
[09:54] haru
    Then...
[09:55] haru
    Then I want Gorar to live in my room with me!
[09:58] aki
    Huh? We have a guest room!
[10:01] haru
    No!
[10:02] haru
    Gorar will need a roommate to help him adjust
[10:04] haru
    to his new life and take care of him!
[10:07] aki
    Haru, you toss and turn in your sleep!
[10:09] aki
    You'll keep Gorar up all night!
[10:11] haru
    You talk in your sleep, Aki!
[10:18] en
    Ew.
[10:25] yu
    Give back my brother Gora!
[10:27] yu
    Hakone Gora is Hakone Gora!
[10:30] yu
    He's no more and no less!
[10:32] yu
    My brother Gora should be my brother Gora!
[10:35] both
    We refuse.
[10:36] aki
    Hakone Gora's true form is Maximum Gorar.
[10:40] haru
    His deserves a position appropriate
    to his unparalleled charisma!
[10:44] en
    And what makes VEPPer so appropriate?
[10:48] both
    Let us tell you!
[10:50] haru
    Gorar is a hero!
[10:52] aki
    VEPPer are idols!
[10:54] both
    It's a natural fit!
[10:56] ryu
    No, no. They're different.
[10:58] ryu
    As different as gender-swap and BL.
[11:00] io
    As different as compound and
    fixed interest over six months.
[11:04] dada
    Haru! Aki!
[11:05] atu
    Hey, he peed—
[11:07] dada
    We should leave this backwater planet
    behind and take off right now!
[11:12] haru
    Are you... moist?
[11:15] dada
    I need to talk to the promoters
    about the space concert tour!
[11:18] dada
    Better get going!
[11:21] at
    What's that? An earthquake?
[11:23] wom
    No! This is...
[11:25] wom
    The sound of space engines firing up!
[11:29] all
    Space engines?!
[11:30] wom
    Yes, the rocket engines of a ship
[11:32] wom
    that flies through space using highly
    advanced scientific technology!
[11:39] yu
    I won't let Bro Gora go!
[11:44] all
    Yumoto!
[11:45] yu
    Scarlet Love Lumiere!
[11:48] en
    Wait!
[11:53] yu
    En-chan-senpai, why did you stop me?!
[11:56] en
    Calm down, Yumoto!
[11:57] en
    We have a right to fight for Gora-san, too.
[12:01] at
    He's always been a good host
    to us at the Kurotama Bath.
[12:04] ryu
    That's important.
[12:05] io
    We're here with you, Yumoto.
[12:08] wom
    Everyone, for the sake of Gora-san,
    transform into the Battle Lovers!
[12:14] en
    This love-filled planet
[12:16] en
    will not abide those who lack love!
[12:18] ryu
    Those who wield loveless power
[12:20] ryu
    must kneel before love!
[12:22] io
    Love is power!
[12:23] io
    Love is hope!
[12:25] atsu
    Be born for love!
[12:27] atsu
    Give your life for love!
[12:29] yu
    Love!
[12:29] yu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[12:32] five
    Battle Lovers!
[12:34] yu
    Feel the power...
[12:36] five
    ...of love!
[12:39] haru
    Too late.
[12:40] haru
    You're the ones who said
    you didn't want to fight.
[12:43] aki
    You missed your chance.
[12:44] aki
    Dadacha, take us home.
[12:46] dada
    Well, you heard them.
[12:48] dada
    You'd better get going.
[12:50] dada
    If you don't,
[12:51] dada
    I'll cast you into the vacuum of space!
[12:55] en
    I'm really mad about how right they are.
[12:57] at
    Though, agitating someone as much as you can
[12:59] at
    then sweeping the rug out from under
    them is a pretty common tactic.
[13:02] io
    The effectiveness of that tactic...
[13:04] ryu
    ...is really getting under my skin.
[13:08] yu
    Please!
[13:10] yu
    Fight us!
[13:12] dada
    This is...
[13:13] dada
    That legendary tactic, total forthrightness?!
[13:17] wom
    To refuse such an honest plea
[13:20] wom
    would disgrace you both as idols and heroes!
[13:23] wom
    What will you do?
[13:24] haru
    A heartfelt gesture?
[13:25] aki
    Cunning...
[13:26] zun
    You must accept their offer!
[13:29] io
    That voice came from Gora-san...
[13:32] ryu
    Did he wake up?
[13:33] ryu
    And he wants them to accept?
[13:36] all
    You're...
[13:37] zun
    Formerly head of TV Universe's programming
    production department, section 2,
[13:41] zun
    currently assistant head clerk-in-training
[13:43] zun
    at TV Universe's historical
    compilation office, copy division!
[13:45] all
    Zundar!
[13:47] dada
    Big bro!
[13:48] all
    Big bro?!
[13:50] zun
    Dear little brother, Dadacha!
[13:51] zun
    I'm glad you're doing well!
[13:54] dada
    You too, big bro!
[13:55] dada
    I wasn't expecting you to
    show up at a time like this!
[13:59] zun
    Fortunately, given my current
    position in the company,
[14:01] zun
    it was easy to get vacation.
[14:04] dada
    I got the box of detergents your
    ex-wife's family sent during Bon!
[14:09] zun
    Did you?
[14:11] zun
    I haven't heard anything
    from her lately at all...
[14:14] dada
    I bet my nephews have all gotten big, too!
[14:17] zun
    Yeah, the child support's
    getting pretty rough.
[14:20] ryu
    Huh?
[14:21] ryu
    Didn't Zundar get demoted?
[14:23] io
    And... they're brothers?
[14:25] io
    They're not even the same species!
[14:28] en
    "Copy clerk" sounds like a demotion to me.
[14:30] at
    No, my biggest concern is
    those serious family issues.
[14:35] at
    Forget everything else!
[14:37] wom
    That's right!
[14:38] wom
    Forget everything else!
[14:41] wom
    What happens here could
    decide the fate of Earth!
[14:46] zun
    My beloved little brother and
    beloved Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[14:50] zun
    Now is the time for you to show
    your glory to the universe!
[14:54] haru
    Dadacha.
[14:55] haru
    Who is this guy?
[14:57] aki
    A porcupine?
[14:58] zun
    On one side, the ones who ruined my TV show,
    CIDE 2, and consigned it to the cancellation bin...
[15:02] zun
    the Earth Defense Club!
[15:04] zun
    The ones who had Chief Hireashi
    sent to the DVD pressing factory,
[15:07] zun
    and I, Zundar, to a do-nothing
    job... the Battle Lovers!
[15:12] zun
    And on the other side, the space idols
    with an album currently on sale,
[15:15] zun
    the VEPPer!
[15:16] zun
    What brings them together?
[15:18] zun
    Maximum Gorar of CIDE 1!
[15:20] zun
    It's a beyond-thrilling development!
[15:23] dada
    Big bro!
[15:23] dada
    You're wonderful! Huggles!
[15:26] ryu
    It's a little weird for him to label
    it "beyond-thrilling" himself.
[15:29] at
    Well, that's TV people for you.
[15:32] zun
    This will bring big ratings for sure!
[15:34] zun
    And this project will return me
    to the programming department!
[15:38] en
    Atsushi, tell him he's really counting
    his chickens before they hatch.
[15:42] at
    No, he's really psyched himself up.
[15:44] at
    I would feel bad letting him
    know the real story now.
[15:47] yu
    I don't care about reasons or projects...
[15:51] yu
    As long as you wake Bro Gora up safely!
[15:55] haru
    This guy really does get under my skin.
[15:57] aki
    I'd love to see him cry.
[15:59] dada
    Good!
[16:00] dada
    Now's the time!
[16:02] zun
    Three, two, one, cue!
[16:15] dada
    Ladies and gentlemen!
[16:18] dada
    Welcome to the amazing show!
[16:21] dada
    This is Idol Battle!
[16:24] dada
    We're about to witness a
    fierce and beautiful battle
[16:27] dada
    for the title of #1 idols on Earth!
[16:33] dada
    Will it be VEPPer or the Battle Lovers?
[16:36] dada
    You're the ones who will decide!
[16:38] dada
    Please use the "Like" button
    on your remote control at home!
[16:47] dada
    If the coin comes up Dadacha,
    VEPPer will go first!
[16:49] dada
    If it comes up Wombat, the
    Battle Lovers will go first!
[16:57] dada
    VEPPer goes first!
[17:00] en
    Don't you think it's strange, Atsushi?
[17:03] at
    How so?
[17:04] en
    In games, usually going second
    gives you the advantage, right?
[17:07] at
    You're right!
[17:08] at
    Especially at music recitals
    and figure skating
[17:10] at
    and other performance-based competitions.
[17:14] en
    But when they learned they were
    going first, they grinned.
[17:26] dada
    Welcome to the VEPP theater!
[17:29] dada
    I'm proud to introduce
[17:31] dada
    that marvelous duo, the VEPPer!
[17:36] dada
    Now's the time!
[17:37] dada
    Enjoy the show!
[17:43] dada
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[17:50] dada
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[17:53] dada
    On the name of the stars!
[18:03] dada
    VEPPer, bringing a thrill
    to this blue planet!
[18:10] dada
    Let's illuminate the entire world!
[18:12] both
    The twin stars shining in the heavens!
[18:13] dada
    On the name of the stars!
[18:14] haru
    Salty Sol!
[18:16] aki
    Melty Luna!
[18:18] both
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[18:24] both
    There's a shining light
[18:27] both
    I won't let anyone else have
[18:30] both
    A pure, great revolution
[18:33] both
    Destiny! Fantasy! Galaxy!
[18:36] all
    Like! Like! Like!
[18:40] voice
    Like!
[18:47] io
    What's going on here?!
[18:49] zun
    The audience's "Likes" become
    attacks against their opponent!
[18:52] wom
    A truly formidable advanced
    scientific technology...
[18:56] at
    There's too many!
[18:58] en
    Don't shave down our HP
    with these piddling things!
[19:00] aki
    Maximum Gorar!
[19:02] aki
    You were our light of hope!
[19:04] haru
    We don't care if the Earth goes away!
[19:06] haru
    As long as we have you, that's all we need!
[19:08] aki
    Rather, we wish it would go away!
[19:11] aki
    Because then, we could be together forever!
[19:17] ryu
    A thrilling twist...
[19:19] ryu
    or rather, a stalkery one!
[19:20] io
    I can't move!
[19:22] en
    I didn't think they'd have a
    system like this in place...
[19:24] at
    It's wearing me down both
    emotionally and physically!
[19:27] yu
    My brother...
[19:28] yu
    I know he's Earth's hero!
[19:31] yu
    And I know that sometimes he would prioritize
[19:33] yu
    being a hero over being my brother...
[19:36] yu
    But... But...
[19:38] yu
    I don't want to lose him
    to something like this!
[19:42] aki
    The three of us will make
    a new world together!
[19:45] aki
    And you can join us there!
[20:07] dada
    VEPPer received a surge of likes!
[20:10] dada
    Oh?
[20:11] dada
    Have the Battle Lovers
    lost their will to fight?
[20:13] dada
    If they don't stand up
    before the count of five,
[20:15] dada
    they'll forfeit the competition,
[20:17] dada
    and the VEPPer will win by default!
[20:21] dada
    Five!
[20:22] dada
    Four!
[20:23] dada
    Three!
[20:24] three
    Hold it!
[20:30] at
    Kin-chan?!
[20:31] en
    They surprised me.
[20:32] en
    What are they doing here?
[20:33] at
    That's right. What about your study abroad?
[20:35] kusa
    When you didn't respond to the email I sent,
[20:38] kusa
    I knew something was wrong.
[20:39] ari
    I've never had a faster trip home.
[20:43] gero
    You certainly are magnets
    for trouble, aren't you?
[20:46] ryu
    What was that?
[20:53] gero
    Well, well.
[20:54] gero
    So you're not completely down!
[20:55] io
    And you three appear to
    have nothing better to do!
[20:58] ari
    So?
[20:59] ari
    What's the show this time?
[21:01] zun
    It's been some time, Caerula Adamas!
[21:04] trio
    Zundar!
[21:05] zun
    That's Lord Zundar, to you!
[21:09] kusa
    We are no longer
[21:11] kusa
    the kind of men who will follow you blindly.
[21:14] zun
    Oh? You intend to defy me?
[21:17] kusa
    If following the path we have chosen
[21:19] kusa
    in a way you don't like
    is the same as defiance,
[21:22] kusa
    then let it be so!
[21:24] zun
    Then prove to me that willingness
    with your own blood!
[21:28] dada
    That's my big bro! Everything
    he says is so cool!
[21:32] en
    Yeah.
[21:33] en
    That is a more profound statement
[21:34] en
    than I'd expect from a papa
    porcupine with child support woes.
[21:38] zun
    D-D-Do not speak of my children!
[21:43] at
    En-chan!
[21:48] kusa
    Conquest!
[21:53] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
[21:56] kusa
    Aurite!
[22:00] ari
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[22:03] ari
    Argent!
[22:07] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[22:10] gero
    Perlite!
[22:12] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[22:15] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love Will Save the Earth!
[23:54] yu
    Next time,
    "Love Will Save the Earth!"
[23:57] yu
    Love Making!
[23:58] ---
    

Season 2

12 - Love Will Save the Earth!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] both
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] io
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] aki
    --
[00:04] trio
    Hold it!
[00:08] dada
    My, my!
[00:09] dada
    I believe this is what's
    known as a "Dream Match"!
[00:12] dada
    Yesterday's enemies become today's allies!
[00:15] dada
    Conquest Club, will you sing for the Earth
    Defense Club?!
[00:19] kusa
    Don't be stupid.
[00:20] kusa
    We would never take part
    in such a ridiculous farce!
[00:23] dada
    What...?
[00:25] both
    What a twist!
SIGN    At last, the idol battle begins!
SIGN    Who will win? The Beppu Brothers or the Defense Club?
SIGN    What is the truth behind the Galaxy Idols?
SIGN    And will love save the Earth?!
SIGN    Love Will Save the Earth!
[01:18] kusa
    We, the Binan High School
    Student Council, do not sing.
[01:21] kusa
    But if you attempt to bring harm
    to students from our school,
[01:26] kusa
    we will not hesitate to fight you!
[01:28] ari
    If the president says so...
[01:30] gero
    If the president and vice president say so...
[01:33] yu
    We're okay now!
[01:35] yu
    We can do it ourselves.
[01:37] ari
    Really?
[01:38] yu
    While you guys and our
    Senpai were buying time,
[01:41] yu
    our HP recovered!
[01:43] wom
    The Battle Lover suits' highly
    advanced scientific technology
[01:47] wom
    is mounted with a self-repair system
    powered by the placebo effect!
[01:52] en
    Wait, that means it's all in our heads, right?
[01:55] yu
    Which means it's our turn to sing!
[01:57] en
    You're kidding.
[01:58] atsu
    It's either that or a smackdown.
[02:01] ryu
    I'd rather sing.
[02:02] io
    Same.
[02:03] yu
    Then let's do it!
[02:05] yu
    Our Earth Defense Club song!
[02:11] all
    No matter how times we fall,
    we'll just get back up!
[02:16] all
    Just as the sun rises from the ground!
[02:27] voices
    Like! Like! Like!
[02:33] voices
    I make thoughtless mistakes.
[02:35] voices
    I let chances slip away.
[02:38] voices
    But whenever that happens...
[02:41] voices
    I hear a voice!
[02:43] haru
    They're getting likes?!
[02:46] aki
    They have no sense of pitch or tempo...
[02:48] aki
    You have to be kidding!
[02:51] aki
    Gorar-san is...
[02:52] aki
    waking up?
[02:55] haru
    He didn't show any reaction to our singing...
[02:58] aki
    Yet this pitiful performance...
[03:00] aki
    Is it impossible for us to beat a bond
    between brothers, no matter what we do?
[03:26] hashi
    Hey, you.
[03:28] hashi
    Did you have pasta with meat sauce for lunch?
[03:31] gora
    Eh? Lunch?
[03:32] gora
    No, mabo tofu.
[03:35] gora
    From a pouch.
[03:36] hashi
    Oh, I see.
[03:38] hashi
    There's a stain on your shirt,
    so I assumed it was meat sauce.
[03:43] gora
    Do you enjoy meat sauce?
[03:46] hashi
    It's fine.
[03:47] hashi
    Actually, I dislike it.
[03:49] hashi
    It's all crumbly, so it's
    hard for me to eat it all.
[03:52] goro
    I... can imagine.
[04:00] hashi
    Do you enjoy chopping wood?
[04:03] gora
    Oh, yes.
[04:04] gora
    I do enjoy it quite a lot.
[04:12] hashi
    Would you like to fight?
[04:16] hashi
    I'm looking for someone who will fight.
[04:21] hashi
    Well, would you give it a try, at least?
[04:36] gor
    H-Hang on here!
[04:48] gor
    Wh-Why...?
[04:49] hashi
    You're cut out to be a hero, you know?
[04:53] hashi
    What?
[04:54] hashi
    You're cut out to be a hero.
[04:59] gora
    Am I, really?
[05:01] hashi
    I've found my villain!
[05:04] gora
    Huh?!
[05:05] hashi
    You are my villain!
[05:09] gora
    Ha, thought so!
[05:11] gora
    Medicine to make Earthlings smarter?
[05:15] gora
    I'll never let you add
    that to the water supply!
[05:17] gora
    Earthlings gotta be dumb! Dumbasses for life!
[05:21] gora
    An educational radio broadcast? On Earth?
[05:24] gora
    Get that crap outta here!
[05:27] gora
    I'll put a stop to all your good deeds!
[05:35] gora
    Earthlings don't need to go to school!
[05:39] gora
    Keep 'em stuck on Earth forever, dickcheese!
[05:42] both
    Wait!
[05:43] haru
    What's with this recording?
[05:45] haru
    The dialogue and the images
    don't match up at all!
[05:48] aki
    Dumbass? Dickcheese?
[05:49] aki
    Gorar would never use such filthy language!
[05:52] haru
    This isn't anything like the
    broadcast version, either!
[05:55] aki
    This reedit is completely lacking in taste!
[05:57] en
    Excuse me. Question.
[05:59] en
    You VEPPer guys are Earthlings, right?
[06:02] both
    We're Earthlings just like Gorar!
[06:04] en
    Wasn't CIDE broadcast on TV Universe?
[06:07] zun
    Indeed it was!
[06:09] en
    If CIDE 1 wasn't broadcast on Earth,
[06:12] en
    how do you know what happened in it?
[06:14] both
    We saw it in space.
[06:16] atsu
    How?
[06:17] haru
    Like anyone does.
[06:18] aki
    On TV.
[06:19] io
    But it's the TV that we're wondering about...
[06:22] ryu
    What's the story?
[06:27] (Flashback) haru
    Gorar!
[06:28] (Flashback) aki
    Don't worry, Haru.
[06:29] (Flashback) aki
    Gorar never loses!
[06:30] (Flashback) haru
    Y-Yeah.
[06:32] (Flashback) haru
    You're right!
[06:34] (Flashback) both
    Fight, Maximum Gorar!
[06:37] (Flashback) gora
    Wood-Chopping Beam!
[06:39] (Flashback) both
    Yeah!
[06:42] en
    Hang on.
[06:43] en
    There are so many things I have
    to question. Too many things.
[06:48] atsu
    What was your father's job, exactly?
[06:49] en
    Yes! That was my question!
[06:51] aki
    That is not the issue here!
[06:53] haru
    We decided to support Gorar.
[06:56] haru
    To keep on supporting him no matter what!
[07:01] gor
    Send whatever you want.
[07:03] gor
    I shall protect the Earth!
SIGN    Can I Destroy Earth? will be airing
    its final episode next week.
[07:06] both
    Cancelled?!
[07:08] ari
    That's right.
[07:08] ari
    I believe we've heard this
    story before, haven't we?
[07:12] gero
    As I recall, no matter how many times
    they attacked, they couldn't beat Gorar.
[07:16] gero
    And then...
[07:17] zun
    Something unanticipated happened.
[07:23] (Flashback) ali
    Haruhiko. Akihito.
[07:26] (Flashback) ali
    I heard CIDE's ending.
[07:28] (Flashback) haru
    What, and now you're glad you don't have
    to watch such a dumb show anymore, right?
[07:32] (Flashback) aki
    Thank you for your worthless opinion.
[07:35] (Flashback) ali
    Nah, it's not that.
[07:37] (Flashback) ali
    I think I'm gonna miss it.
[07:40] (Flashback) ali
    I was just starting to think...
[07:42] (Flashback) ali
    Gorar was pretty stubborn, and
    really strong, and kinda cool.
[07:47] (Flashback) ali
    That's all.
[07:48] (Flashback) ali
    Later.
[07:50] zun
    Although Gorar was meant to be a villain,
[07:52] zun
    he amassed surprising popularity.
[07:55] zun
    The higher-ups saw their
    plans going off the rails,
[07:57] zun
    and decided to cancel the show.
[08:00] (Flashback) haru
    Your stay's being extended?!
[08:01] (Flashback) aki
    You said we'd be going back right away!
[08:05] (Flashback) haru
    Our dad's a liar.
[08:08] (Flashback) aki
    I wonder how Gorar's doing...
[08:10] (Flashback) haru
    Did they really stop sending monsters?
[08:13] (Flashback) haru
    I hope the Earth's really okay...
[08:15] (Flashback) aki
    The show's been canceled,
[08:17] (Flashback) aki
    and TV Universe probably doesn't
    have the budget to keep it up.
[08:20] (Flashback) haru
    I wonder why they canceled it...
[08:22] (Flashback) aki
    But if it's canceled, that means
    Gorar won't have to fight anymore.
[08:27] (Flashback) haru
    I know that!
[08:28] (Flashback) haru
    It's not that I like
    watching Gorar get hurt...
[08:32] (Flashback) aki
    Really?
[08:34] (Flashback) aki
    You can be pretty selfish sometimes, Haru.
[08:36] (Flashback) haru
    And you can say some pretty
    nasty things sometimes, Aki.
[08:43] (Flashback) both
    Let's stop it.
[08:44] (Flashback) aki
    We're just lonely.
[08:47] (Flashback) aki
    Because we miss Gorar.
[08:49] (Flashback) haru
    We can't cheer him on anymore.
[08:51] (Flashback) aki
    And we never got to thank him for
    that first time at Binan Land.
[08:55] (Flashback) haru
    "Make mischief if you must.
[08:56] (Flashback) haru
    Just grow up big and strong," he said.
[08:58] (Flashback) haru
    I wonder if we're doing a good job?
[09:00] (Flashback) aki
    We are.
[09:02] (Flashback) aki
    I'm sure if Gorar saw us, he'd be proud.
[09:05] (Flashback) haru
    I hope you're right.
[09:09] (Flashback) haru
    Yeah.
[09:10] (Flashback) haru
    I wish Gorar could see us now...
[09:14] (Flashback) dada
    No problem!
[09:16] (Flashback) haru
    Yuck!
[09:19] (Flashback) dada
    Yes! I just knew you had talent!
[09:23] (Flashback) dada
    You Beppu Brothers are the only ones who
    could ever swat the great Dadacha out of the air!
[09:27] (Flashback) aki
    A flying squirrel?!
[09:28] (Flashback) dada
    A dwarf flying squirrel!
[09:30] (Flashback) dada
    More precisely,
[09:31] (Flashback) dada
    I am a dwarf flying squirrel-like alien
[09:33] (Flashback) dada
    who closely resembles one of your
    Earth dwarf flying squirrels.
[09:35] (Flashback) haru
    You're calling yourself a dwarf
    flying squirrel-like alien?
[09:38] (Flashback) aki
    I think he flew into our house by accident.
[09:40] (Flashback) aki
    Let's let him out, like a rhinoceros beetle.
[09:44] (Flashback) dada
    Wait! Listen to me!
[09:46] (Flashback) dada
    You want to meet Gorar, don't you?
[09:49] (Flashback) aki
    Did you say Gorar?
[09:50] (Flashback) dada
    I did, I did!
[09:51] (Flashback) dada
    Yes, I did!
[09:52] (Flashback) haru
    I don't care what kind of
    flying squirrel you are,
[09:55] (Flashback) haru
    if you're using Gorar's name to jerk
    us around, we'll tear out your fur.
[09:59] (Flashback) dada
    Cut it out!
[10:00] (Flashback) dada
    I've got a good deal for you!
[10:01] (Flashback) dada
    With Maximum Gorar retired,
[10:04] (Flashback) dada
    the only option is for you to go on TV!
[10:07] (Flashback) haru
    What?
[10:08] (Flashback) haru
    I don't understand.
[10:09] (Flashback) dada
    Just as you saw Gorar on TV,
[10:13] (Flashback) dada
    if you went on TV, Gorar
    would be the one to see you!
[10:17] (Flashback) aki
    But CIDE was canceled...
[10:19] (Flashback) dada
    So we need a new angle.
[10:21] (Flashback) dada
    Idols!
[10:22] (Flashback) both
    Idols?!
[10:24] (Flashback) dada
    Idols can be on music shows, of course,
    but also variety shows and dramas!
[10:27] (Flashback) dada
    Idols can do anything!
[10:29] (Flashback) dada
    This time, you'll be the ones to reach him!
[10:32] dada
    And on that day, VEPPer was born!
[10:37] haru
    Bimbos like you wouldn't understand the
    rigors of show business, of course.
[10:42] aki
    We had to go on tour.
[10:43] aki
    And sell ourselves.
[10:44] haru
    We had to humble ourselves to
    some deeply unpleasant people.
[10:46] haru
    Because it was the only way to get to Gorar.
[10:50] aki
    And at last, we broke through.
[10:51] aki
    And just when we thought
    we might get our own show,
[10:54] aki
    a certain TV program started.
[10:56] aki
    What do you think it was?
[10:58] gero
    Was it, oh, the one we were on? CIDE 2?
[11:02] aki
    Yes. The pathetic Conquest Club.
[11:05] aki
    The idiotic Earth Defense Club.
[11:08] haru
    And what annoyed us even more was
    that CIDE 2 was popular in the end!
[11:12] en
    Okay, but it's not like we
    knew we were on a TV show.
[11:16] en
    It was just Atsushi and Kusatsu's
    little lovers' quarrel anyway.
[11:19] both
    Don't call it a lovers' quarrel!
[11:20] en
    Then what should I call it?
[11:22] io
    A miscommunication?
[11:24] ryu
    A misunderstanding?
[11:25] gero
    A misapprehension?
[11:26] ari
    Could we have a little less
    talk from the second-year trio?
[11:29] ari
    Kinshiro's about to die
    of humiliation over here.
[11:32] kusa
    Am not!
[11:33] haru
    Dammit!
[11:34] haru
    These idiots beat us...
[11:35] haru
    Are the general public stupid?
[11:36] haru
    Are they just stupid?!
[11:37] aki
    We were supposed to return home
     as Earth's first top space idols.
[11:42] aki
    And we would have, if not for you!
[11:44] wom
    And that's why you challenged
    the Battle Lovers to a fight,
[11:46] wom
    even though they're Earthlings like you?
[11:50] haru
    That's right!
[11:51] haru
    We will crush you!
[11:52] aki
    We won't even allow you
    the dignity of existing!
[11:59] [Messenger] sign
    Wood-Chopping Warrior
    Maximum Gorar
    Finishing Move: Wood-Chopping Beam
    Super Wood-Chopping Axe
[12:05] wom
    Is it time for the smackdown?!
[12:06] dada
    Wait!
[12:07] dada
    Galaxy Idols aren't allowed to get in fights!
[12:11] haru
    Idols aren't so limited!
[12:13] haru
    Everyone expects us to have
    a scuffle or two nowadays!
[12:17] aki
    Have you ever been forced to do a show
[12:19] aki
    where the writing was absolute crap!?
[12:23] haru
    Fans who seem devoted,
[12:25] haru
    then turn on you when you
    don't match your image...
[12:28] aki
    Incompetent producers who think only of
    protecting and promoting themselves...
[12:32] haru
    Those are the realities
    we weathered to get here!
[12:34] aki
    You think you can compare with us?!
[12:37] kusa
    At-chan!
[12:38] yu
    Stay back, Kin-chan-senpai!
[12:41] yu
    You student council guys just watch!
[12:43] yu
    This battle is between the
    Earth Defense Club and VEPPer!
[12:47] kusa
    But...
[12:48] atsu
    Yumoto's right.
[12:49] atsu
    I think we actually need to fight this one.
[12:52] en
    Rising to the challenge and all that.
[12:55] io
    Just as investment requires
    ethics and vision,
[12:57] io
    a life requires style.
[13:00] ryu
    In other words, this is
    where we show our stuff.
[13:04] haru
    After you avoided us and looked
    down on us so many times?
[13:08] haru
    So you really do sing a different
    tune when Gora-san's involved!
[13:10] aki
    I knew it, but it's still irritating.
[13:12] aki
    As people who worked our fingers
    to the bone to become idols...
[13:15] yu
    Is being an idol really that hard?
[13:19] haru
    You bet it is!
[13:21] yu
    If the fun parts don't outweigh the
    hard parts, I think that's wrong!
[13:25] aki
    Are you stupid?
[13:26] aki
    That's mere idealism!
[13:28] aki
    Look at reality!
[13:30] yu
    I'm having fun in the Defense Club.
[13:32] yu
    And in the Battle Lovers, too!
[13:34] yu
    I think it's amazing to
    knuckle down and work hard,
[13:37] yu
    but won't that eventually
    lead you to a dead end?
[13:39] yu
    It's wonderful to do stuff for
    some person or some goal, too...
[13:44] yu
    But in the end, doesn't it come
    down to whether you like it or not?
[13:48] haru
    You make me sick!
[13:50] haru
    Losers, stand aside!
[13:52] aki
    We aim for the top!
[13:54] ryu
    Who are you calling losers?
[13:55] io
    I'd like you to amend that statement!
[13:57] haru
    I don't think so!
[13:58] both
    Sure-Kill Thundering Comet!
[14:02] en
    Ryuu!
[14:03] atsu
    Io!
[14:04] yu
    Doing something to be better than
    others is the dumbest thing there is!
[14:08] yu
    I'd rather have people say
    "he sucks, but I like him"
[14:10] yu
    or "he's awkward, but I like him."
[14:13] yu
    If someone told me they liked
    me because I'm the best...
[14:15] yu
    I'd hate that!
[14:16] aki
    Stop dreaming!
[14:17] haru
    Being an idol is a business!
[14:19] haru
    The business of giving dreams to others!
[14:21] yu
    But is there love there?!
[14:24] both
    No!
[14:25] all
    What?!
[14:28] wom
    A complete repudiation of love?!
[14:30] kusa
    They're still capable of
    pushing back against Hakone Yumoto?
[14:33] haru
    What idols need aren't dreams, but lies!
[14:36] aki
    You trick people, deceive them, entice them.
[14:39] aki
    That's what it means...
[14:41] both
    ...to be an idol!
[14:45] haru
    Everything we've done has been for Gorar-san!
[14:48] aki
    All of it for this day!
[14:50] haru
    We belong to Gorar-san...
[14:53] aki
    And Gorar-san belongs to us!
[14:58] yu
    Bro!
[14:59] yu
    Bro!
[15:01] aki
    You, who speak only in platitudes...
[15:03] haru
    ...are weaker than us, who
    act in pure self-interest!
[15:06] aki
    Feeling always triumphs...
[15:08] haru
    ...over reason!
[15:11] yu
    Bro!
[15:25] (Flashback) yu
    Big bro?
[15:28] yu
    Big bro!
[15:36] yu
    Yumoto?
[15:38] aki
    Haru! Don't falter!
[15:40] haru
    I'm not faltering!
[15:44] atsu
    What were you thinking, VEPPer?
[15:46] io
    What do you mean?
[15:48] atsu
    If it's a contest of feelings,
[15:49] atsu
    Yumoto's are going to be
    stronger than VEPPer's.
[15:51] en
    Overwhelmingly so.
[15:53] en
    Talk about a miscalculation...
[15:56] yu
    No! Bro! Come back to me!
[16:04] kusa
    What we're seeing...
[16:05] kusa
    The souls of the Hakone Yumoto of the present
[16:06] kusa
    and the Hakone Yumoto of the past are
    resonating with each other across space-time?
[16:10] en
    Yumoto!
[16:11] en
    Calm down!
[16:12] atsu
    He's losing himself to his fear!
[16:14] io
    You mean he's out of control?
[16:15] ryu
    Dammit, what are you doing, you idiot?!
[16:19] wom
    Y-Y-Yumoto-san!
[16:22] yu
    Big bro! Where are you?!
[16:25] haru
    H-He's...
[16:26] ari
    Unbelievable!
[16:30] yu
    I'm taking back my brother!
[16:35] yu
    Ultimate...
[16:36] yu
    Love...
[16:38] yu
    Attack!
[16:39] en
    Yumoto!
[16:39] atsu
    Yumoto!
[16:39] both
    Yumoto!
[16:44] ryu
    Stop it, Yumoto!
[16:45] io
    You mustn't!
[16:46] en
    Don't forget the true nature of love!
[16:48] atsu
    Yumoto!
[16:48] atsu
    What is love?
[16:51] en
    Answer us, Yumoto!
[16:56] yu
    I...
[16:57] ryu
    Stupid Yumoto!
[16:58] io
    Really.
[16:59] io
    We have such a troublesome kouhai among us.
[17:02] atsu
    Get a grip. I mean it.
[17:04] en
    Don't forget, your brother Gora
    isn't the only one in your life.
[17:06] en
    You have all of us, too.
[17:08] yu
    I'm sorry, Senpai.
[17:11] yu
    I was alone in the dark,
    with the cold wind blowing,
[17:16] yu
    when I heard your voices...
[17:18] yu
    I understand now.
[17:20] yu
    The "Ai" in "Idol"
[17:22] yu
    is the "Ai" of Love!
[17:26] gero
    Is he going berserk again?
[17:27] ari
    No, it's something else!
[17:39] kusa
    Th-This is...
[17:41] wom
    This is the Ultra More-Better Version!
[17:44] zun
    Not again!
[17:46] yu
    To me, idols are people I feel
    better just having around!
[17:52] yu
    Just knowing they're there
    makes me feel stronger.
[17:55] yu
    Just like En-chan-senpai and Atsushi-senpai
[17:58] yu
    and Io-senpai and Ryuu-senpai!
[18:02] yu
    That's what my brother was to
    you, right, Brothers-senpai?
[18:06] yu
    And if you're an idol yourself,
[18:08] yu
    I think you should want to make
    the people around you happy!
[18:12] yu
    As many people as possible!
[18:13] en
    The spiral of love...
[18:15] atsu
    Of loving and being loved...
[18:16] io
    It continues onward...
[18:18] ryu
    For eternity!
[18:19] yu
    That is the "ai" of idols!
[18:24] all
    Ultra True Love Attack!
[18:53] gora
    Yumoto?
[18:54] gora
    Is something the matter?
[18:56] gora
    Are you sick to your stomach again?
[18:58] yu
    No, I'm okay.
[19:00] gora
    I see.
[19:02] gora
    I was having a dream.
[19:05] yu
    What was it?
[19:06] yu
    Tell me, big bro.
[19:08] gora
    It was a dream about many
    people I met long ago,
[19:11] gora
    when I did many things.
[19:16] gora
    Oh?
[19:17] gora
    You two...
[19:19] gora
    Are you the children from Binan Land?
[19:22] haru
    Gorar?
[19:23] aki
    How could you tell?
[19:26] gora
    How?
[19:27] gora
    You were in my dream, too.
[19:33] haru
    Why?
[19:34] aki
    Why do you have to address us
    when we're at our most pathetic?
[19:39] gora
    Pathetic?
[19:40] gora
    How?
[19:41] gora
    You've grown so big and strong.
[19:46] gora
    You kept your promise to Gorar, didn't you?
[19:49] gora
    I'm happy.
[19:54] gora
    What's all this?
[19:56] gora
    What's wrong, you two?
[20:01] gora
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[20:08] gora
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[20:11] gora
    On the name of the stars!
[20:15] haru
    Thanks for listening to us
    all the way to the end!
[20:17] aki
    We're so happy to know that
    our songs can help you!
[20:22] haru
    To be honest, VEPPer has been through a lot,
    and we've had a lot of setbacks lately.
[20:26] haru
    But now we understand what it is
    that we really love to do!
[20:30] aki
    We're grateful to the
    people who taught us that.
[20:33] aki
    And we love you, Beppu Apes!
[20:43] en
    So?
[20:43] kusa
    So what?
[20:45] en
    Well, any stories?
[20:47] kusa
    No.
[20:48] en
    Oh, come on.
[20:49] en
    You had fun, right?
[20:52] kusa
    Did we?
[20:53] ari
    It was pretty standard.
[20:54] gero
    Well, there was that one interesting thing.
[20:56] gero
    Jellied eels.
[20:58] ryu
    Whatted whats?
[20:58] io
    It's a local dish.
[21:00] ryu
    Eel should be done kabayaki style!
[21:02] gero
    I don't know why you expect me to defend it.
[21:04] ryu
    Boy, do you suck.
[21:06] atsu
    Did they have hot baths?
[21:08] kusa
    No, just shower booths.
[21:10] ari
    They looked a bit like toilets,
    all lined up in a row.
[21:14] en
    See? That's interesting.
[21:16] en
    Tell us more stuff like that.
[21:18] yu
    But at the end of the day,
    soaking in a hot bath is the best.
[21:21] en
    There goes Yumoto, jumping to philosophy.
[21:23] atsu
    But I think I understand what he means.
[21:26] wom
    It's the bath that makes the Earth
    Defense Club what it is, right?
[21:31] yu
    Yeah!
[21:32] yu
    And...
[21:34] yu
    We have new members, too!
[21:36] both
    Yeah...
[21:37] yu
    And now we're all together!
[21:40] yu
    But...
[21:40] yu
    I feel like someone's missing.
[21:42] wom
    Erk!
[21:44] en
    Gora-san's chopping wood, right?
[21:45] atsu
    Zundar and Dadacha went
    back to space together...
[21:49] atsu
    So who could it be?
[21:50] io
    Good question...
SIGN    Important news after the break!
SIGN    <Important News>
SIGN    Mr. Tawarayama was once again brought back to life thanks to the "life" brought to Earth by one of Wombat's people. Thank goodness.
SIGN    

Season 3

Season 3

1 - Untitled

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:21] yu
    By the way... About Mr. Tawarayama...
[00:25] yu
    What do you think?
[00:26] atsu
    About what?
[00:27] yu
    He came back to life.
[00:28] ryu
    Right, he did. This is
    the second time, right?
[00:32] naru
    Actually, I believe he revived
    during our summer vacation, too...
[00:35] yu
    Until our Love Attack—
[00:37] atsu
    Don't say it!
[00:39] atsu
    So, what were you saying
    about Mr. Tawarayama?
[00:43] yu
    That alien... What was it again?
[00:45] ryu
    Wom-san's weird friend...
[00:48] naru
    The mulberry-colored naked
    mole rat-looking thing?
[00:50] yu
    Yeah, that naked mall rat thing...
[00:53] naru
    Naked mole rat.
[00:54] yu
    Moley-san, for short!
[00:56] yu
    Moley-san said he brought two "lives" with him,
     and brought him back to life with that...
[01:01] atsu
    Yeah, he just sprang back
    to life, just like that.
[01:05] yu
    The Mr. Tawarayama brought back
    to life with the "life" he brought...
[01:09] yu
    Can we really say he's the same
    Mr. Tawarayama we knew before?
[01:17] naru
    G-Good point...
[01:19] atsu
    I n-never thought of that...
[01:20] yu
    What are you saying? Mr. Tawarayama
    is Mr. Tawarayama!
[01:25] yu
    Even if he's different on the inside.
[01:26] atsu
    You think he's different, though?!
[01:28] naru
    Please, don't unnerve us like this.
[01:29] ryu
    Yeah! How are we supposed to
    interact with him from now on?
[01:33] yu
    Well, we're graduating,
    so we don't have to care...
[03:49] yu
    Atsushi... You know...
[03:51] yu
    There's something I've been
    thinking about lately.
[03:54] atsu
    What is it, En-chan?
[03:56] atsu
    The Olympics?
[03:57] atsu
    Toyosu?
[03:58] atsu
    Trump?
[03:59] yu
    No. Flower-viewing.
[04:01] atsu
    Flower-viewing?
[04:03] yu
    The cherry blossoms are pretty and all,
[04:05] yu
    but seasonally speaking,
    it's still cold out there.
[04:08] yu
    Yet people still go at night, and they sit on
    the ground outside and have picnics and stuff.
[04:12] yu
    Pretty rigorous stuff, don't you think?
[04:14] atsu
    That's true.
[04:16] atsu
    I bet the salarymen catch colds when they
    get drunk and strip down and stuff...
[04:20] yu
    Also, aren't cherry blossoms iconic
    of the first day of school?
[04:24] atsu
    Yeah, makes you think of first graders
    with their big leather backpacks...
[04:27] yu
    But lately, the cherry blossoms have been
    blooming closer to late March, right?
[04:32] atsu
    Global warming, I guess...
[04:34] yu
    By early April, all the trees
    might even be blossom-free.
[04:37] atsu
    They do fall awfully quickly.
[04:40] yu
    You think cherry blossoms might stop
    being a first-day-of-school icon
[04:43] yu
    and become a graduation day icon instead?
[04:45] atsu
    That sounds pretty nice.
[04:46] atsu
    Graduating in a storm of cherry blossoms...
[04:49] yu
    You think? I find the idea
    a little lonely, myself.
[04:55] wom
    I always love coming to the Kurotama Bath!
[04:58] ari
    Hey!
[05:00] yu
    Here's an unusual group.
[05:02] wom
    I met them outside and invited them in!
[05:06] ari
    That's right! "Come take a bath," he said.
[05:12] atsu
    What's wrong, Kin-chan?
[05:14] ari
    He's worried about the graduation ceremony.
[05:16] yu
    Wondering how long the cherry
    blossoms will stay in bloom?
[05:19] ari
    Cherry blossoms? No, the speech.
[05:21] kusa
    It's the student council
    president's final duty.
[05:23] atsu
    Oh, Kin-chan, you're giving the speech?
[05:25] yu
    What's he worried about?
[05:27] ari
    The text of it.
    He can't figure out what to say.
[05:30] yu
    Why not just string a bunch
    of platitudes together?
[05:33] ari
    When Kinshiro tries to think some up,
    it ends after three lines.
[05:37] kusa
    I struggle with poetic turns of phrase.
[05:39] atsu
    You shouldn't pressure yourself so much.
[05:41] yu
    Yeah. It's not like anyone
    listens to those things.
[05:44] kusa
    I dislike such lazy thinking.
[05:47] atsu
    Yeah, you always have been earnest.
[05:49] wom
    When you have troubles,
    that's when you take a hot bath!
[05:52] wom
    Such magnificent Earth culture!
[05:55] ari
    Thinking about it,
[05:56] ari
    I bet it's that earnestness that
    made Zundar seek you out.
[06:00] kusa
    Clarify.
[06:02] ari
    Well, I could explain what I think
    might have started it all...
[06:06] ari
    It concerns you, though. Do you mind?
[06:08] yu
    Huh? Me?
[06:09] wom
    Say it! Say it!
[06:11] wom
    All things are permitted,
[06:13] wom
    as long as they are said with love!
[06:15] yu
    Actually, I've got the
    mental fortitude of tofu.
[06:18] yu
    In fact, it might be closer to soy milk.
[06:21] ari
    See, Yufuin-san... you're smart,
    but you don't work hard,
[06:25] ari
    and you tend to leave most
    things to luck. Right?
[06:28] yu
    That's a hell of a question to ask a person...
[06:30] atsu
    I think he's right, though.
[06:33] atsu
    Sometimes that's a good thing...
SIGN    Finals Test Order Ranking (3rd Years) Rank Name 1st Yufuin En 2nd Kusatsu Kinshiro 3rd Itsumo Nisan 4th Kinugawa Atsushi
[06:35] ari
    ...and sometimes, it's very bad.
[06:45] ari
    Well, knowing our earnest,
    hard-working president,
[06:48] ari
    I'm sure that stoked his anxieties.
[06:52] wom
    How can Zundar be so cute?!
[06:55] wom
    So cute!
[06:57] atsu
    Wait, is that how you met Zundar?
[07:00] ari
    Certainly not.
[07:02] ari
    He fell from the sky.
[07:03] (Flashback) zun
    Zundar commands you!
[07:05] (Flashback) zun
    Convert the student council
    into the Earth Conquest Club,
[07:08] (Flashback) zun
    and purge the world of sloth and negligence.
[07:12] yu
    Um... You're kidding.
[07:15] ari
    Our president just can't refuse a hard sell.
[07:18] atsu
    I know.
[07:19] kusa
    What is that supposed to mean, At-chan?!
[07:20] atsu
    That you can't say no when
    someone asks you for a favor.
[07:24] kusa
    I can't, can I? Then what about
    you guys in the Defense Club?
[07:27] yu
    How we started, you mean?
    How'd that go, again?
[07:29] atsu
    I don't actually remember.
[07:30] wom
    This is pathetic!
    We met here, just like this!
[07:42] wombat
    Where might this be?
[07:46] atsu
    A public bath... Why do you ask?
[07:48] wombat
    What is a pub-lic-bath?
[07:49] atsu
    It's a place where you pay money
    to sit in heated water,
[07:54] atsu
    to maintain bodily hygiene and relax the mind.
[07:57] wombat
    Relax the mind!
[07:58] wombat
    The people of this planet have an even
    more refined civilization than I thought!
[08:05] wombat
    How I should like to protect this planet.
[08:08] wombat
    R-Right...
[08:10] wombat
    Would you mind helping me?
[08:14] wombat
    Please!
[08:17] wombat
    Um... I'd just like...
[08:19] wombat
    to talk...
[08:22] en
    H-Hey! It stinks! It hurts!
    The fur's pricking me!
[08:25] atsu
    What is this thing? A bear? A dog? A pig?
[08:28] yumoto
    Sirs! Please, no wrestling in the bath!
[08:32] yumoto
    A wombat!
[08:37] yumoto
    Diprotodontia Macropodidae!
[08:39] yumoto
    Cousin to the koala!
[08:41] yumoto
    They get sick if they get lonely
    and have flat noses!
[08:44] yumoto
    There, there! Don't struggle!
[08:46] wombat
    Help me!
[08:52] en
    He came back to life?!
[08:54] wombat
    After all this, I won't
    ask any more of you boys!
[08:57] wombat
    On the contrary, I'm going to
    make you take responsibility!
[09:01] atsu
    Responsibility?
[09:02] ryuu
    For what?
[09:03] yumoto
    He's saying we can cuddle
    for the rest of our lives!
[09:05] wombat
    It'll take too long to explain,
    so I'll make it quick!
[09:08] wombat
    Lovracelet!
[09:14] yumoto
    What's this?
[09:16] yumoto
    You're giving them to us?
    "The Wombat Returns"?
[09:18] wombat
    The Lovracelets are your love, given form!
[09:22] yumoto
    Wombat's love given form?
[09:24] en
    Wait, what the hell is "love given form"?
[09:27] yumoto
    It buzzed!
[09:29] ryu
    Are these defective?
[09:31] io
    That's a problem. Should I contact the
    manufacturer and earn us a quick buck?
[09:34] atsu
    You're surprisingly unscrupulous.
[09:36] wombat
    They are not defective!
[09:39] wombat
    That's the Lovracelet's Love Alert!
[09:42] wombat
    Let's go!
[09:44] wombat
    Now, you must "Love Making"
    into the Battle Lovers!
[09:48] en
    Huh? Love Ma—
[09:50] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[09:53] io
    What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
[09:56] ryuu
    "Beloved Earth"?
[09:58] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[10:01] io
    You, too?
[10:03] io
    Love is all!
[10:05] atsu
    Are you... being forced to say this?
[10:08] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[10:10] yumoto
    I get it!
[10:11] yumoto
    Making us pose and say embarrassing lines
    is part of your mysterious power, right?
[10:15] wom
    No, it is the power of love!
[10:18] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[10:21] five
    Battle Lovers!
[10:25] yumoto
    Love Making!
[10:52] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[10:53] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[10:56] en
    Love Making.
[11:06] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[11:08] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[11:11] atsu
    Love Making!
[11:21] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[11:22] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[11:25] io
    Love Making.
[11:35] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[11:37] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[11:40] ryuu
    Love Making!
[11:50] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[11:51] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[11:54] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[11:56] five
    Of love!
[12:00] yumoto
    Our powers unite to...
[12:15] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[12:31] kusa
    That took forever! It was lazy, too!
[12:34] ari
    Not like you can cure the Defense
    Club's laziness at this point.
[12:37] kusa
    Whose side are you on, Arima?
[12:39] ari
    Yours, of course, Kinshiro!
[12:42] haru
    You fools!
[12:44] haru
    It's just this behavior that lets
    others take advantage of you!
[12:48] aki
    I agree with Haru completely.
[12:49] gero
    Goodness. This whole business
    has made you both so touchy.
[12:52] haru
    You're the one who's touchy.
[12:55] gero
    I told you from the start,
    I don't care either way.
[12:59] aki
    Wait. The most unforgivable ones here are...
[13:03] aki
    Those two in the Defense Club!
[13:06] gero
    For once, I actually agree
    with you, Beppu Brothers.
[13:09] ryu
    What the heck?
[13:09] naru
    What on earth?
[13:10] atsu
    What's going on?
[13:11] atsu
    Some sort of trouble?
[13:13] naru
    No, I wouldn't say trouble, exactly...
[13:16] ryu
    They dragged us into it.
[13:17] both
    What do you mean, dragged you into it?!
[13:19] wom
    H-Have our second-years
    caused you some trouble?
[13:22] yu
    Wom-san's become a fussy old lady.
[13:24] haru
    We can't make a decision because
    they won't take it seriously.
[13:28] gero
    It would be nice to have
    things cleared up soon.
[13:30] haru
    Not that I'm personally invested in the result...
[13:33] ryu
    I told you, whoever wants
    to do it should do it!
[13:37] naru
    It doesn't even matter who reads the address.
[13:40] yu
    Address?
[13:41] atsu
    The speech by an underclassman
    representative to the graduating students.
[13:44] yu
    Oh, that kind of address.
[13:47] ryu
    You hear that, guys?
[13:48] ryu
    It matters so little, he doesn't even
    know what you're talking about.
[13:51] gero
    Of course, I personally don't
    care one way or the other.
[13:54] gero
    But for public events like this,
    rules and conventions should be respected.
[14:00] aki
    Of course.
[14:01] aki
    But isn't that all the more reason it shouldn't be
    another student council member who reads it,
[14:04] aki
    but the best representative
    of the school as a whole?
[14:08] haru
    Although, if you really want to read it,
    that's another matter entirely...
[14:12] gero
    If I was asked to, I'd be willing.
[14:14] gero
    I do feel I'd be more appropriate than
[14:18] gero
    some students who only just transferred here.
[14:20] ryu
    This is getting on my nerves!
[14:22] ryu
    Do you want to do it or not?!
    Make up your mind!
[14:25] gero
    Why don't you say that to these two?
[14:27] gero
    If you want to do it, just say so.
[14:29] gero
    I'm fully prepared to step down.
[14:32] haru
    It's clear to me that you're
    the one who wants to do it.
[14:34] aki
    Self-conscious, are you? How sad.
[14:37] naru
    If you ask me, it's all
    pots calling kettles black.
[14:40] all
    What did you say?!
[14:42] aki
    I can't let that one slide.
[14:43] haru
    Neither can I!
[14:45] gero
    Setting the address aside for a moment,
[14:47] gero
    is there another person in the world so
    dedicated to their personal beauty as I?
[14:53] gero
    Even just drinking tea,
[14:55] ---
    or even when I sigh, I'm beautiful.
[14:58] gero
    See? Like this.
[15:15] {song
    The common people's faces,
    so ugly in their laughter
[15:22] {song
    The crowds comport themselves
    exactly like pigs
[15:29] {song
    Let common sense and wise sayings be damned
[15:36] {song
    If they do not agree with my aesthetics
[15:43] {song
    I am true beauty!
[15:49] {song
    No one can hope to match my
    face, my hair, my body...
[15:56] {song
    More beautiful than flowers,
    more enchanting than the moon
[15:59] {song
    Yes, I'm so much more!
[16:03] {song
    The true evil in the world is disorder
[16:10] {song
    I'll purge it all in the name of beauty!
[16:29] gero
    You see now? I'm the true "good-looking boy."
[16:32] gero
    Rather, the "precious human being."
[16:34] both
    Wow. Amazing.
[16:36] gero
    Spare me your insincere praise.
[16:38] gero
    You really are insensitive, aren't you?
[16:40] ryu
    No, I genuinely find this incredible.
[16:43] nari
    Same, same.
[16:45] aki
    I'm sure I don't need to say it,
    but we carry the title of eternal pretty boys,
[16:50] aki
    and our Beppu Apes comprise
    98% of the whole school.
[16:53] aki
    And we're close to the
    graduation ceremony guest,
[16:56] aki
    representative of the Binan Ginza
    Young Men's Association, Hakone Gora!
[17:00] aki
    It's obvious that either of us would make
[17:02] aki
    appropriate representatives
    of the underclassmen!
[17:06] {song
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[17:13] {song
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[17:16] {song
    On the name of the stars!
[17:33] {song
    We were born in the Milky Way
[17:39] {song
    You see the supernova in our eyes?
[17:46] {song
    The reason you can read
    your fortune in the stars
[17:53] {song
    Is because we've written the
    script of your dreams there
[17:59] {song
    Lucky you! Open your eyes!
[18:02] {song
    Happy you! Open them wide!
[18:05] {song
    Don't be too dazzled by this radiance...
[18:08] {song
    This is how we're kissing you!
[18:14] {song
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    blooming in the galaxy!
[18:21] {song
    Moon and sun, miracles and secrets
[18:24] {song
    We're the stars making wishes come true!
[18:27] {song
    VEPPer, the twin stars
    racing through the galaxy!
[18:34] {song
    Let's illuminate the mysteries
    of the universe...
[18:37] {song
    On the name of the stars!
[18:40] {song
    Come with us, and we'll be eternal legends!
[18:49] both
    Wow. Amazing.
[18:51] ari
    Our school's second-years
    certainly are aggressive.
[18:54] ryu
    You said it!
[18:55] nari
    We're practically invisible
[18:57] nari
    next to gimmick characters like them.
[19:15] {song
    Let's start from today
[19:18] {song
    From savings to investment...
[19:21] {song
    The bank's interest is mere pocket change
[19:24] {song
    I'm playing the stock market, baby
[19:28] {song
    I research information on my tablet
[19:31] {song
    Looking for the brands
    that seem ready to explode
[19:34] {song
    And once I've found enough good data
[19:36] {song
    I buy them all up at near rock-bottom prices
[19:40] {song
    But I don't wait for them
    to hit their ceiling
[19:47] {song
    I choose a price in advance,
    and once it hits my goal,
[19:55] {song
    I sell without a moment's hesitation!
[19:59] {song
    Ah, money is the only true
    justice in this world
[20:05] {song
    As long as I have money,
     I can beat any enemy with ease!
[20:11] {song
    Let me teach you a few
    of my earning techniques
[20:18] {song
    World peace, you say?
    I'll even find a way to buy that!
[20:26] {song
    Money is all!
[20:37] {song
    Baby baby, sweet baby
[20:41] {song
    Don't be so selfish
[20:45] {song
    You won't turn me on that way, you know
[20:59] {song
    I'm the hottest guy around
[21:02] {song
    My hair style's always on point
[21:06] {song
    Just one look and you're through
[21:09] {song
    You're mine forever
[21:12] {song
    Are you ready?
[21:14] {song
    You want to fall head over heels, don't you?
[21:19] {song
    It's a game of teasing, ups and downs
[21:23] {song
    And in that game, it's always my turn
[21:26] {song
    I have as many girls in my service
[21:33] {song
    as there are stars in the sky
[21:36] {song
    I'm the prince of the stars!
[21:41] {song
    Baby baby, sweet baby
[21:44] {song
    If you want my love
[21:47] {song
    Better watch out for burns on your heart!
[21:55] {song
    Call me, call me, call me more
[21:58] {song
    Don't be so selfish
[22:02] {song
    You won't turn me on that way, you know
[22:17] ari
    Oh? Is it that kind of episode?
[22:20] ari
    I guess I'll have a go at it, too.
[22:32] {song
    If you wish it, I shall bend my knee to you
[22:42] {song
    I do not feel disgraced, but honored
[22:52] {song
    The first day I met you
[22:58] {song
    It was as if I received a divine mission
[23:03] {song
    For devoting myself to you fills me with joy
[23:14] {song
    Let's keep this up forever,
    until my life ends
[23:19] {song
    I will travel with you
    to the end of the world
[23:24] {song
    This is just as a butler should be
[23:29] {song
    Loyal servitude...
[23:32] {song
    This is my one and only philosophy!
[23:51] en
    Sheesh, what a pain in the ass...
[23:55] {song
    Shall I teach you the secret to world peace?
[23:58] {song
    Everyone just has to do nothing!
[24:01] {song
    Everything in this world
    takes too much effort to do
[24:04] {song
    And I really, really
    don't want to do anything
[24:07] {song
    Actually, I want to know where
    you guys get all this energy
[24:10] {song
    Just beat the enemy so that I can go home!
[24:20] {song
    I don't want to do anything
[24:23] {song
    I have absolutely zero enthusiasm
[24:26] {song
    Why, then, do I have to fight?
[24:33] {song
    The class representative,
    the most popular guy in school...
[24:39] {song
    Those guys are cut out to heroes!
[24:42] {song
    So why was I chosen?!
[24:45] {song
    Everything in this world
    takes too much effort to do
[24:48] {song
    And I really, really
    don't want to do anything
[24:51] {song
    Actually, I want to know where
    you guys get all this energy
[24:54] {song
    Just beat the enemy so that I can go home!
[24:57] {song
    I want to waste my life
    lying around, doing nothing
[25:01] {song
    I want to sleep, wake up,
    and go back to sleep!
[25:04] {song
    Eating a hot spring manju once in a while...
[25:07] {song
    To sum up, everything takes
    too much effort to do!
[25:24] atsu
    Oh, En-chan.
[25:26] atsu
    You say it's too much effort,
    but you do it anyway.
[25:28] atsu
    Guess I'll try it, too!
[25:44] {song
    What am I afraid of?
[25:46] {song
    Having an invisible wall in front of me
[25:51] {song
    Makes me realize my own cowardice
[25:54] {song
    Sacrificing passion for clear-headedness
[26:01] {song
    Is such a foolish thing to do
[26:04] {song
    Move the way you feel,
    that's what I should do
[26:09] {song
    Something even more simple
    than running on instinct
[26:14] {song
    But do I have that fire inside of me?
[26:19] {song
    Why so cool? I want to shout
    until my voice turns hoarse
[26:25] {song
    As if it could set my cold heart ablaze
[26:29] {song
    Am I such a fool?
    When I act like a bystander,
[26:35] {song
    I have nothing, I achieve nothing
[26:53] atsu
    Well? Want to try it too, Kin-chan?
[26:57] kusa
    If I must.
[26:59] {song
    You were laughing again,
[27:05] {song
    not knowing what I go through
[27:13] {song
    Even if it was an idle promise,
    it was still a betrayal
[27:19] {song
    Ever since I learned even sworn
    friendship could break down
[27:24] {song
    I had stopped making wishes on stars
[27:30] {song
    But for some reason, I found myself
    looking to the night sky again
[27:35] {song
    What was I searching for,
    every time we passed?
[27:41] {song
    Not for an opportunity,
    but for my own courage
[27:46] {song
    When all I want to do is to go
    back to the way things were...
[27:52] {song
    There's a pain in my chest,
    you're like a devil
[27:57] {song
    When even your smiles seem
    to pierce through my heart
[28:02] {song
    Did you just whisper "that's all over now"?
[28:08] {song
    Or was that me, screaming,
    trying to run away?
[28:13] {song
    How many times did I turn
    back to look at you?
[28:19] {song
    Since you were walking away,
    you never knew...
[28:35] ari
    Now, what were we talking about again?
[28:37] naru
    We were talking about our character
    gimmicks being far inferior to theirs.
[28:41] ryu
    We're basically extras.
[28:43] naru
    So anyway, you should
    work this out without us.
[28:46] naru
    Maybe you could ask the senpais to decide.
[28:48] gero
    No!
[28:48] gero
    There are four third-years, an even number!
[28:50] aki
    What if it ends up as a tie?
[28:51] ryu
    But we're an even number, too!
[28:53] naru
    Yumoto! There's only one of him.
    He'll be our odd number.
[28:55] ryu
    That's right!
[28:56] ryu
    The underclassman representative needs
    the support of the first-years, too.
[28:59] naru
    Huh?
[29:00] ryu
    Yumoto?
[29:01] wom
    I have not been cuddled once today.
[29:05] all
    Eh?
[29:05] ---
    What?!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[29:11] ryu
    Yumoto!
[29:12] ryu
    There he is!
[29:13] all
    Yumoto!
[29:15] ryu
    That is Yumoto, isn't it?
[29:19] kusa
    He's here?
[29:21] yu
    I think so...
[29:22] ari
    What's he doing?
[29:24] naru
    He's got something in his hands.
[29:26] ryu
    Isn't that a sponge?
[29:28] all
    A sponge?
[29:29] gero
    Why?
[29:29] haru
    Wherefore?
[29:30] aki
    To what end?
[29:31] wom
    Yumoto-san!
[29:32] wom
    What is that you're squishing there?
[29:36] wom
    Am I not enough for you?
[29:40] wom
    Go on, cuddle me!
[29:42] yu
    This is freaky.
[29:43] wom
    Cud-dle-me!
[29:43] yu
    It's like he's been totally broken.
[29:45] atsu
    Wom-san's so desperate...
    He hated it so much at first.
[29:49] wom
    Cuddle me!
[29:50] both
    He did, he did.
[29:53] kusa
    The light's back in his eyes.
[29:56] wom
    If something is troubling you,
    you can tell us about it.
[30:00] yumo
    There's nothing.
[30:01] wom
    Tell us!
[30:03] ryu
    I think I know what this is.
[30:05] kinu
    What?
[30:06] ryu
    Relationship burn-out.
[30:07] naru
    The result of an overextended spring.
[30:10] kinu
    Enthusiasm's fall?
[30:12] haru
    It is spring, though.
[30:13] aki
    Fall?
[30:14] kinu
    This is no time for a vaudeville routine.
[30:17] yu
    Seriously, what's wrong?
[30:19] yu
    Nothing.
[30:21] en
    Give me a break.
[30:22] en
    The show's been on for thirty minutes
    without the protagonist having a line.
[30:25] en
    There's clearly something wrong.
[30:28] yu
    I'm not a protagonist. I'm not anything.
[30:32] wom
    What did you say?!
[30:33] kusa
    That's a serious statement.
[30:36] ari
    Haven't you loved all your enemies into
    submission with your heavy-handed lectures?
[30:41] gero
    Yeah! Just like this!
[30:44] {song
    One, two, three! Love and joy!
[30:47] {song
    Let's get started!
[30:49] {song
    One, two, three! Love and joy!
[30:55] {song
    It's sudden, but it was inevitable!
[30:58] {song
    Time to transform!
[31:00] {song
    It's the old story of
    the reluctant superhero!
[31:06] {song
    But right now, there's a monster out there!
[31:11] {song
    This is so fun! I'm gonna fight!
[31:16] {song
    I love cuddling! I wanna cuddle things!
[31:23] {song
    That's why I need to protect Earth!
[31:26] {song
    So I can love everything even more!
[31:34] {song
    Love, love! Today's another great day!
[31:39] {song
    With love on your side,
    everything ends in a "hallelujah!"
[31:45] {song
    Cuddle, cuddle! Today's another big success!
[31:50] {song
    I don't know everything that's going on,
[31:55] {song
    but I just want to enjoy
    everything with all I've got!
[31:59] {song
    One, two, three! Love and joy!
[32:02] {song
    Let's keep going!
[32:04] {song
    One, two, three! Love and joy!
[32:15] yu
    Well, that's all over now.
[32:18] yu
    It just feels like a fondly remembered
[32:22] yu
    but far distant past...
[32:29] en
    Yumoto just raised one hell
    of a set of death flags.
[32:34] atsu
    Maybe he's getting sentimental
    because it's spring.
[32:37] atsu
    Let's give him some time to himself.
[32:42] atsu
    What?
[32:43] kusa
    Nothing...
[32:44] ari
    I understand how you feel, Kinshiro, but...
[32:49] kusa
    Arima!
[32:50] ari
    For now, let's figure out what to do with the
    student address and the graduates' reply speech.
[32:53] gero
    Yeah.
[32:59] yu
    It hurts to be around my senpais.
[33:03] yu
    I wish graduation...
[33:04] man
    ...would never, ever come!
[33:07] man
    Listen to them all!
    Graduation this, graduation that!
SIGN    Botan Yuzuru
[33:11] man
    What's so great about
    graduation ceremonies? Huh?!
[33:15] yu
    I hear you.
[33:18] man
    What?!
[33:18] yu
    I know how you feel.
[33:36] ryu
    Okay, let's decide it
    with rock-paper-scissors.
[33:39] gero
    Certainly.
[33:40] naru
    Let's try it.
[33:42] trio
    Scissors, paper, rock!
[33:44] trio
    Rock! Rock! Rock!
[33:45] ari
    Just three days left...
[33:48] yu
    Oh, until the graduation ceremony?
[33:49] kinu
    It sure sneaks up on you, huh?
[33:53] en
    I'd prefer to get it over with
    sooner rather than later...
[33:55] en
    Wonder what'll happen when it's over.
[33:57] kusa
    Nothing.
[34:00] kusa
    Nothing will change.
[34:02] kusa
    It can't possibly change.
SIGN    132nd Graduation Ceremony Binan High School
[34:13] boy
    Senpai, you've helped me
    out so much. Thank you!
[34:17] sen
    Keep up the hard work,
    even with us gone, okay?
[34:20] boy
    Okay!
[34:21] sen
    These three years went by so fast.
[34:24] sen
    Seriously. It feels exciting
    and sad, all at once.
[34:31] taw
    This peaceful weather is perfect
    for a graduation ceremony.
[34:34] taw
    Don't you agree, Mr. Principal?
[34:35] prin
    I do agree.
[34:37] prin
    Mr. Tawarayama, have you grown
    more youthful than before?
[34:42] prin
    Just a little while ago, you were like
    a dead fish or a rotted-out tree...
[34:46] taw
    Do I look that much better?
[34:49] pri
    Yes...
[34:52] ko
    So... S-Senpai, th-this might
    be a bit early, but...
[34:57] ko
    C-Can I have your second jacket button?
[35:00] sen
    Second button?
[35:02] ko
    I might not get a chance
    to ask after the ceremony...
[35:05] ko
    But I want a memento of you.
[35:08] ko
    I'll treasure it forever!
[35:09] ko
    I want it, too!
[35:11] sen
    Gosh...
[35:12] botan
    Give me a damn break!
[35:15] botan
    To hell with graduation ceremonies!
[35:17] botan
    To hell with jacket buttons!
[35:18] botan
    To hell with the senpai-kouhai relationship!
[35:20] botan
    All of you, die!
[35:28] kusa
    What's going on?
[35:31] kusa
    Conquest!
[35:36] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
[35:39] kusa
    Aurite!
[35:43] kusa
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[35:46] kusa
    Argent!
[35:51] kusa
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[35:53] kusa
    Perlite!
[35:55] kusa
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[35:58] kusa
    Caerula Adamas!
[36:01] kusa
    We shall not allow you
    to disrupt life on campus!
[36:06] bot
    You're the Caerula Adamas!
[36:08] bot
    Damn you!
[36:13] gero
    Go!
[36:16] kura
    Take this!
[36:22] kusa
    Where did he go?
[36:23] kinu
    Kin-chan!
[36:24] kinu
    Leave this to us!
[36:27] kinu
    You should prioritize your roles
    as student council members.
[36:31] ari
    You're sure we can leave it to you?
[36:33] en
    If you can't, just give up.
[36:35] ari
    That was an easy agreement.
[36:37] kusa
    Understood. At-chan, we're counting on you.
[36:39] kinu
    Right.
[36:40] kinu
    Let's go, everyone!
[36:41] ---
    Yeah!
[36:50] bot
    Graduation, initiation, congratulation...
    They can all go to hell!
[36:55] bot
    Tomorrow, you'll still be the same
[36:57] bot
    lazy idiots you were yesterday and today!
[37:04] zun
    From what I've been told,
[37:05] zun
    a "graduation ceremony" is a
    ritual wherein the conclusion
[37:09] zun
    of one's course of study is acknowledged,
    and maturation and achievements are praised.
[37:13] dada
    Talk about conceited!
[37:15] dada
    It's ridiculous, isn't it, big bro?
[37:17] zun
    Enough of this mutual admiration society!
[37:19] zun
    We, the Zundar-Dadacha Brothers,
    are the ones truly deserving of praise!
[37:22] zun
    If you can't understand that, we will
    demonstrate our fraternal power to you now!
[37:27] zun
    Go, Second Button Monster!
[37:30] bot
    I'll never let you graduate!
[37:33] yu
    That's enough! I can't believe
    there are still monsters around!
[37:37] ryu
    But why are they still around?
[37:39] naru
    I'm pretty sure the Beppu
    Brothers reformed, so...
[37:43] en
    You two... the Teeny-Tiny Brothers!
[37:45] zun
    Don't just give us...
[37:47] dada
    ...some random name!
[37:48] atsu
    Didn't they go home reformed?
[37:50] en
    Things got a little crazy back there...
[37:53] en
    I actually don't remember how it ended.
[37:55] ryu
    How'd it go, again?
[37:56] naru
    How did it go, indeed?
[37:58] zun
    We pretended to reform and return home,
[38:01] zun
    while secretly waiting
    for a chance for revenge!
[38:05] dada
    It was so cold. We were so hungry...
[38:09] dada
    Days of sleeping under eaves
    and porches, enduring typhoons,
[38:12] dada
    with just a single newspaper between us...
[38:15] zun
    Say no more, Dadacha.
[38:17] dada
    Brother!
[38:18] dad
    We bore the unbearable!
[38:19] zun
    Endured the unendurable!
[38:21] both
    We are the Teeny-Tiny Brothers!
[38:23] both
    Our victory is nigh!
[38:25] yu
    Hey, they adopted the name I gave them.
[38:27] wom
    Everyone!
[38:29] wom
    Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[38:33] yumoto
    Love Making!
[39:01] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[39:03] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[39:06] en
    Love Making.
[39:17] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[39:19] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[39:21] atsu
    Love Making!
[39:31] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[39:33] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[39:36] io
    Love Making.
[39:46] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[39:48] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[39:51] ryuu
    Love Making!
[40:01] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[40:03] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[40:05] ryuu
    This love-filled planet will
    not abide those who lack love!
[40:09] ryuu
    Those who wield loveless
    power must kneel before love!
[40:13] ryuu
    Love is power!
[40:14] ryuu
    Love is hope!
[40:16] ryuu
    Be born for love!
[40:17] ryuu
    Give your life for love!
[40:19] ryuu
    Love!
[40:20] ryuu
    We are, forever, the heirs
    to the throne of love...
[40:23] ryuu
    Battle Lovers!
[40:25] ryuu
    Feel the power...
[40:27] ryuu
    Of love!
[40:30] dada
    There you are, Battle Lovers!
[40:32] zun
    Finish them!
[40:34] bot
    Fools, trying to stop my attempt
    to stop the graduation ceremony!
[40:37] bot
    Take this!
[40:40] ryu
    Hurts!
[40:41] naru
    It does hurt more than you'd expect it to!
[40:43] kinu
    And so many buttons...
[40:45] en
    Where did he get them all?
[40:47] bot
    These are all the buttons
    no one ever asked for!
[40:52] bot
    The buttons of tragic students
    who had to leave the school
[40:55] bot
    without any kouhai talking to them
    or asking for their buttons!
[40:59] bot
    The buttons hurt in proportion to
    the tears that were shed over them!
[41:03] ryu
    You're talking about a petty grudge.
[41:04] ryu
    "I'm pissy because no one
    paid attention to me."
[41:08] en
    It has nothing to do with graduation
    ceremonies or personal virtue.
[41:11] bot
    Shut up! Grudges rock!
[41:19] bot
    What?
[41:25] yu
    Brothers-senpai!
[41:33] yu
    The twin stars shining in the heavens!
[41:35] yu
    Salty Sol!
[41:37] yu
    Melty Luna!
[41:40] yu
    Galaxy Idols, the VEPPer!
[41:43] dada
    You're going to transform without MC Dadacha?
[41:46] haru
    We can't remain reliant on an MC forever.
[41:49] aki
    We're going to set our own
    stage for ourselves, Dadacha.
[41:53] dada
    How admirable!
[41:54] dada
    I mean... how ungrateful!
[41:56] dada
    Second Button Monster, punish those two!
[41:59] bot
    Done and done!
[42:05] bot
    Are graduation ceremonies
    really that important?
[42:08] haru
    Yes, they are!
[42:09] bot
    Why? Because of your senpais?
[42:12] aki
    Not just that!
[42:13] aki
    We also want to show the visiting
    guests how we're doing, too!
[42:16] aki
    Because we owe them!
[42:22] bot
    That's even more annoying!
[42:24] bot
    To hell with personal growth!
    To hell with people you care about!
[42:35] bot
    The finish!
[42:38] yu
    Brothers-senpai!
[42:42] yu
    What gives you the right to stop this?
[42:45] yu
    Don't you realize graduation
    ceremonies are important?
[42:47] bot
    I decide what's important and what's not!
[42:50] yu
    You can decide for yourself
    what's important to you,
[42:54] yu
    but not to other people!
[42:56] bot
    Then let me ask you this!
[42:57] bot
    You say everyday hard work and obeying the
    rules every day are the most important things!
[43:01] bot
    So what's the point of
    having a special ceremony?
[43:06] bot
    Isn't the real meaning to be found
    in doing the same thing every day?
[43:11] yu
    You're right...
[43:12] atsu
    Oh, no! Yumoto's being out-debated!
[43:15] bot
    When all's said and done,
[43:17] bot
    graduation ceremonies are
    absolutely meaningless!
[43:26] all
    Yumoto!
[43:28] zun
    We did it!
[43:28] dada
    We did it! We did it!
[43:32] yu
    Scarlet Love Lumiere!
[43:37] atsu
    Why?
[43:37] wom
    Yumoto-san's power comes from
    his declarations of love!
[43:42] wom
    Now he's lost that,
[43:44] wom
    he's lost his power as
    Battle Lover Scarlet, too!
[43:47] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[43:49] bot
    What's wrong, Battle Lover Scarlet?
[43:55] all
    Yumoto!
[43:56] wom
    Why, after loving down so
    many monsters in the past,
[44:00] wom
    is he failing now?
[44:02] gora
    I know how Yumoto feels.
[44:05] wom
    What did you say?
[44:06] gora
    Yumoto empathizes with the monster.
SIGN    Guest
[44:09] gora
    That's why he can't bring
    himself to attack it.
[44:12] wom
    Empathizes?
[44:13] wom
    How could he feel the same
    way the monster does?
[44:16] gora
    Because...
[44:18] gora
    He doesn't want the graduation
    ceremony to happen, either!
[44:23] yu
    I... I don't want the graduation
    ceremony to happen.
[44:35] naru
    Yumoto loved out?
[44:37] ryu
    What are you doing? Get a grip!
[44:39] yu
    Not being able to be happy for
    En-chan-senpai and Atsushi-senpai's graduation...
[44:43] yu
    Taking the side of a monster...
[44:46] yu
    I'm a failure as a Battle Lover.
[44:49] yu
    To be honest, I don't care
    about the graduation ceremony.
[44:54] yu
    To be even more honest,
    I wish they'd call it off.
[45:04] all
    Love Out.
[45:10] yu
    Senpais?
[45:11] yu
    Brothers-san?
[45:14] en
    You're right. I was feeling the same way.
[45:16] atsu
    Yeah.
[45:19] haru
    He got us.
[45:20] aki
    Hit the nail on the head.
[45:23] yu
    No! It's not for reasons like you guys,
[45:26] yu
    because it's annoying or
    I don't want to bother...
[45:29] yu
    My reason... My reason is much more selfish!
[45:32] yu
    Because I want to stay in the
    Defense Club with you guys forever!
[45:37] yu
    That's why!
[45:38] yu
    I'm sorry!
[45:40] bot
    The team's broken up, and now
    you've lost your will to fight?
[45:43] bot
    Now, die!
[45:47] all
    Yumoto!
[45:49] yu
    Senpais!
[45:50] gora
    Yumoto! The others!
[45:52] wom
    Go no further!
[45:54] gora
    Why?
[45:55] wom
    This matter must be resolved
    by the Battle Lovers!
[45:59] wom
    What is real love?
[46:00] wom
    If they cannot discover that for themselves,
[46:03] wom
    then no matter how you aid them,
    they will never defeat that monster!
[46:08] wom
    And, Maximum Gora...
[46:12] wom
    Your love is in letting things go.
[46:15] gora
    I see.
[46:17] gora
    Yumoto...
[46:18] dada
    They appear to be utterly helpless.
[46:20] both
    Dadacha!
[46:21] both
    Zundar!
[46:23] dada
    Now we can go home with heads held high!
[46:25] zun
    VEPPer, do you see which
    side is stronger now?
[46:28] dada
    Now, come rejoin TV Universe
    and we'll start over again!
[46:34] haru
    No way! We refuse!
[46:35] aki
    We'll never do as you say ever again!
[46:38] dada
    What?!
[46:40] haru
    Dadacha, we're grateful to you.
[46:42] haru
    But we need to go even further than before.
[46:46] aki
    We can't move forward if
    we're trapped in the past.
[46:49] haru
    That's why we...
[46:50] aki
    ...are saying goodbye to you!
[47:00] bot
    Finished already, are you?
[47:04] yu
    The fun times in the club room.
[47:08] yu
    The kindness of my senpais!
[47:12] yu
    The struggles of the Battle Lovers!
[47:16] atsu
    Yumoto?
[47:18] yu
    The love we inspired in each other!
[47:21] all
    The love we inspired in each other!
[47:28] yu
    The spirits that would never be broken!
[47:31] all
    The spirits that would never be broken!
[47:38] yu
    Defense Club forever!
[47:41] all
    Forever!
[47:43] yu
    Congratulation on your graduation, senpais.
[47:46] yu
    Thanks for everything.
[47:47] yu
    It's sad to say goodbye,
[47:50] yu
    but in exchange,
[47:51] yu
    we'll be gaining a new future
    that spreads out wide before us.
[47:57] yu
    Love Congratulation!
[48:05] bot
    Such optimistic words!
[48:08] bot
    I was so focused on the graduation ceremony,
[48:10] bot
    I forgot what lay beyond!
[48:12] bot
    So this is... love!
[48:22] wom
    They purged the monster without even
    transforming into the Battle Lovers?
[48:26] wom
    What a miracle!
[48:28] wom
    This is the true power of love!
[48:30] yu
    Love Graduation!
[48:33] atsu
    Yumoto! Ryu! Io!
[48:35] en
    Thanks for everything.
[48:37] atsu
    We'll work hard, so you
    keep up the hard work, too.
[48:40] all
    Right!
[48:45] kusa
    Today, we experience the
    ritual of graduation.
[48:49] kusa
    To be perfectly honest,
[48:51] kusa
    we will not see tremendous changes in
    ourselves when this ceremony concludes.
[48:56] ---
    But there is one thing I know for certain:
[49:00] ---
    I will remember this day
    for the rest of my life.
[49:05] ---
    And whenever I'm feeling frustrated or sad,
[49:10] ---
    I'll remember my friends' faces
[49:12] ---
    and feel empowered once again.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[49:26] en
    Well, that's over.
    I hate sitting still for so long.
[49:30] ari
    Defense Club, have you seen Zundar around?
[49:33] aki
    Has anyone seen Dadacha?
[49:35] yumo
    Actually, Wom-san's not here, either...
SIGN    To Everyone
[49:38] en
    What's this?
[49:40] atsu
    A letter?
[49:42] wom
    Battle Lovers... Rather, members
    of the Earth Defense Club...
[49:47] wom
    By the time you read this,
[49:50] wom
    I will likely be completing the
    preparations for my return home.
[49:54] wom
    Now that Earth is filled with love,
[49:57] wom
    I must move on to a different planet.
[50:01] wom
    There are still many planets in the universe
[50:06] wom
    filled with hatred, fear, and indifference.
[50:08] wom
    It seems my retirement
    is still a long way off.
[50:12] zun
    Let us out! Let us out!
[50:13] wom
    If, in the future,
[50:14] wom
    the Earth is threatened by
    another loveless something,
[50:19] wom
    I hope you will all think back on the days
[50:23] wom
    you spent as heirs to the throne of love.
[51:01] all
    Wom-san!
[51:03] yu
    Wom-san!
[51:06] wom
    Everyone!
[51:08] yu
    What's wrong with you? How could
    you just sneak away like that?
[51:12] en
    You could stay another
    day or two, couldn't you?
[51:16] atsu
    H-Here! Your favorite, spinach curry!
[51:20] ryu
    You'll come again, won't you?
     You will, won't you?
[51:22] naru
    Stay in touch! I'll keep my schedule open!
[51:25] wom
    Thank you!
[51:26] yu
    Wom-san, thanks for all the cuddles!
[51:29] yu
    I'll never forget the cuddles we shared!
[51:31] wom
    I'll never forget, either!
[51:35] wom
    All of you...
[51:37] wom
    Heirs to the throne of love...
[51:39] wom
    Be well!
[52:29] {song
    As we spent our days doing trivial things
[52:39] {song
    I guess we always knew this day would come
[52:50] {song
    No matter how much everything else changes
[52:55] {song
    We've created something
    that won't ever change
[53:00] {song
    Which means we can walk forward,
    always knowing the way
[53:11] {song
    When you walk down that long staircase,
    you must never look back
[53:22] {song
    Let's take a step into a new future
[53:27] {song
    Embracing love
[53:35] {song
    The love born to my heart and yours
[53:46] {song
    It still connects us, powerfully
[53:51] {song
    So wipe away your tears
[53:56] {song
    This massive, massive future
    opens up ahead of us
[54:10] {song
    I won't ever feel lonely
[54:15] {song
    Because we're connected by love
[54:41] {song
    The love born to my heart and yours
[54:52] {song
    It still connects us, powerfully
[54:57] {song
    So wipe away your tears
[55:03] {song
    Let's open up the massive,
    massive future ahead
[55:16] {song
    Once we've exchanged all our words of thanks
[55:22] {song
    We'll walk on, with love

Season 4

Season 4

1 - The Suddenness of HAPPY! KISS

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] fura
    --
[00:00] etsu
    --
[00:00] ---
    --
[00:00] kiri
    --
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[00:32] kiri
    Hey, Kyotaro! There you are!
[00:37] kiri
    What's that? A bird?
[00:42] shu
    You shouldn't have startled him, Ryo-chin.
[00:44] kiri
    I see the animals still love you, at least.
[00:48] kiri
    Didn't I catch you napping with a stray cat
     in the courtyard not long ago?
[00:53] shu
    Did you?
[00:54] kiri
    Look at you, you're a mess.
[00:56] kiri
    You need to brush your hair.
[00:57] shu
    So? What did you want?
[00:59] kiri
    Oh, right. You missed a quiz.
[01:03] kiri
    I told them you were in
    the nurse's office, but...
[01:05] shu
    Ah, thank you.
[01:08] kiri
    Don't "thank you, yawn" me!
[01:12] kiri
    You're gonna get written up again.
[01:15] shu
    I'll work it out.
[01:16] kiri
    Work it out how?
[01:18] shu
    Well, things have always worked out before.
[01:21] kiri
    Is that looking on the bright side,
    or throwing in the towel?
[01:25] shu
    I'm not sure...
[01:26] shu
    What do you think it is, Ryo-chin?
[01:28] kiri
    How should I know?
[01:30] kazu
    Is this indolence I see?
[01:31] kiri
    Insolence?
[01:32] kazu
    In-do-lence.
[01:34] kiri
    Wakura-senpai, you really have
    an advanced vocabulary.
[01:38] kazu
    Put simply, it means "lazy."
[01:42] kazu
    But since things always work out for you,
[01:45] kazu
    I can't totally criticize you,
    which is the problem.
[01:49] shu
    I think I just get lucky.
[01:51] kazu
    No, no. Even if it's just luck,
    it's impressive.
[01:57] waku
    Ryoma-kun, would you make us some tea?
[01:58] kiri
    What treats did you bring today?
[02:00] waku
    I'm not telling you, Ryoma-kun.
[02:03] waku
    Just kidding. It's salt
    daifuku from the Takeyado.
[02:07] kiri
    Salt daifuku!
[02:08] kiri
    What tea do you recommend?
[02:11] waku
    Roasted green...
[02:12] kiri
    Got it!
[02:13] waku
    Just kidding. A bitter black would be best.
[02:15] kiri
    R-Right!
[02:18] shu
    Hey, Nanao-san.
[02:19] waku
    Yes?
[02:20] shu
    I've been thinking...
[02:22] shu
    Aren't you a little too hard on Ryo-chin?
[02:26] waku
    Certainly not.
[02:27] waku
    Things do tend to get hard
    when he's around.
[02:30] kiri
    What do you mean by that?
[02:32] waku
    You really want to know?
[02:33] kiri
    No, actually.
[02:36] waku
    It's because you're so much fun, Ryoma-kun.
[02:41] kiri
    I'm... honored.
[02:42] shu
    I think I see what you mean.
[02:45] waku
    Right?
[02:48] waku
    Well, all that aside...
[02:50] waku
    The little ones are late, aren't they?
[02:52] do
    Hey, hey, hey!
[02:53] do
    I told you, it's proof!
[02:54] ban
    What's this one board supposed to prove?
[02:57] dogo
    I told you, it's proof that people
    besides us were in the Defense Club!
[03:02] ban
    It's just a silly prank.
[03:03] dogo
    What makes you think it's a prank?
[03:06] waku
    What's going on, Ichiro-kun? Taishi-kun?
[03:08] shu
    Why are you always arguing? Chiro, Tai-Tai?
[03:12] dogo
    Taishi says there was no Defense Club!
[03:12] ban
    Ichiro says there was a Defense Club!
[03:16] kiri
    Hey, little ones. I see you're playing nice.
[03:17] dogo
    Little ones? You mean us?
[03:20] ban
    That label is extremely inappropriate.
[03:22] ban
    Well, maybe it's all right for Ichiro.
[03:24] dogo
    Hey, hey, hey! What do you mean,
    it's all right for me?
[03:26] ban
    Do I really need to explain reality to you?
[03:29] ban
    You're a munchkin, Ichiro.
[03:30] dogo
    I've gained three millimeters
    since the year started!
[03:33] ban
    Your math must be off.
[03:35] kiri
    So, what's this about the Defense Club?
[03:38] dogo
    We're debating whether
    there was a Defense Club...
[03:40] ban
    ...or if there wasn't one.
[03:43] dogo
    Nanao-senpai, what do you think?
[03:45] ban
    It's just a prank, right?
[03:48] waku
    That's a good question...
[03:50] waku
    What do you think, Kyotaro-kun?
[03:53] shu
    Long ago... or perhaps not so long ago,
[03:58] shu
    there were aliens who were
    trying to destroy Earth.
[04:01] shu
    But others rose up to prevent them,
    and this is where they organized.
[04:07] shu
    They called themselves
    the Earth Defense Club.
[04:11] dogo
    You mean, they protected Earth?
[04:13] shu
    You think they didn't?
[04:15] shu
    What did you think they
    were protecting, Chiro?
[04:17] ban
    Wait a minute. Shuzenji-senpai,
    were you just...
[04:21] shu
    ...making it up.
[04:25] kiri
    I thought it sounded made up.
[04:27] shu
    I just thought it would
    be neat if it was true.
[04:29] kiri
    Yeah, yeah. Let's have tea, everyone.
SIGN    The Suddenness of HAPPY! KISS
[04:39] shu
    Maybe their enemies were
    called the Conquest Club.
[04:43] shu
    That would be the opposite of the Defense Club.
[04:44] kiri
    Are we still on this subject?
[04:46] shu
    Each time I look at that darkened sign,
[04:49] shu
    it feels like we've come so far.
[04:52] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai, you sound
    like an old man. It's freaky.
[04:56] shu
    Is it?
[04:58] shu
    I want to get older soon,
    so I can spend eternity spacing out.
[05:03] shi
    I won't allow it!
[05:06] una
    But you don't think adding more
    school rules is a bit much?
[05:09] shi
    Unazuki-san, you're too soft.
[05:12] shi
    If we allow for freedom and independence,
[05:14] shi
    Binan High School will deteriorate further.
[05:16] shiro
    It's not good right now?
[05:18] shiro
    I'm in shock...
[05:19] shi
    Of course it's not, Maasa!
[05:22] shi
    Indolence and sloth run rampant!
[05:25] shiro
    Indolence? Sloth?
[05:28] shiro
    I don't understand those words myself.
SIGN    Koshigawa Wataru
[05:31] etsu
    I just love the Binan High
    School student council!
[05:35] etsu
    The ever-gallant president, Ibusuki Ata-san!
[05:39] etsu
    With his aura of born handsomeness,
    vice president Unazuki Taiju-san!
[05:44] etsu
    And the impish little cutie-pie,
    secretary Shirahone Maasa-san!
[05:49] etsu
    They're too bright for my eyes to behold!
[06:03] kiri
    Kyotaro, you're like an old man.
[06:06] kiri
    You even make breathing
    look like too much effort.
[06:09] shu
    If I forget to breathe, do remind me.
[06:17] shu
    This feels good.
[06:19] shu
    Makes me sleepy...
[06:21] kiri
    H-Hold it, Kyotaro!
[06:26] kiri
    Kyotaro. What's that?
[06:33] ban
    Yikes!
[06:37] karl
    Wow, I can't believe there's
    water in a place like this!
[06:41] karl
    Major surprise!
[06:42] kiri
    Who's this? A customer?
[06:44] waku
    I've never seen him before.
[06:46] karl
    Sorry to startle you.
[06:48] waku
    No, that's all right...
[06:50] shu
    You came here dressed?
[06:53] kar
    Should I have taken off my clothes?
[06:55] waku
    Well, one usually does.
[06:58] karl
    How come?
[06:59] kiri
    Isn't it uncomfortable to be in wet clothes?
[07:03] karl
    Now that you mention it...
[07:05] karl
    But...
[07:13] karl
    Now it's all better!
[07:15] dogo
    Wow, wow, wow! You're like an animal!
[07:18] karl
    Is that strange? Unusual?
[07:23] karl
    You don't dry off so easily here?
[07:27] karl
    I see!
[07:28] karl
    Then... can you do this?
[07:32] dogo
    No, no, no!
[07:35] karl
    How about this?
[07:39] dogo
    I told you, no, no, no.
[07:50] waku
    What is this? Magic tricks?
[07:54] karl
    That's right, this is our tributary!
[07:58] karl
    It's the human realm! Earth!
[08:00] karl
    The people, the powers,
    and the society are all different!
[08:03] karl
    Neat!
[08:05] karl
    But this is no time to
    stand around starry-eyed...
[08:07] karl
    Oh, oh, what was I supposed
    to do next, again?
[08:11] dogo
    What's a tributary?
[08:12] ban
    A territory. Sort of like a colony.
[08:16] karl
    I know! I should explain.
[08:19] karl
    I need to explain to you... my subjects!
[08:25] karl
    I'm Karls, first prince of Honyala Land!
[08:28] karl
    I've come to rule over you, happy-style!
[08:33] dogo
    What the heck is this? What, what, what?
[08:35] ban
    Is that an otter?
[08:36] karl
    Oh, drat. I turned back to normal. Tee-hee.
[08:42] shu
    I need to trade in my
    winning popsicle sticks.
[08:45] karl
    Wait, wait! I've got a deal for you!
[08:48] shu
    A great offer?
[08:49] karl
    Yes! Info on an amazing, surprising bargain!
[08:52] karl
    You'll regret it forever
    if you let this slip away.
[08:54] waku
    Just what is this deal?
[08:56] karl
    The Karls Knights are hiring!
[08:58] karl
    You get to be my knights for free!
[09:01] karl
    You can even help me in my happy reign!
[09:04] karl
    Great deal, huh?
[09:08] waku
    Right, I need to wash
    the curtains in my room.
[09:11] waku
    I just forgot, I'm running low on tea.
[09:12] waku
    I have a library book to return.
[09:13] waku
    Gotta water my flowers.
[09:15] karl
    Wait! Wait!
[09:17] karl
    Is all that more important
    than being a knight?
[09:22] shu
    No... it just sounds like a raw deal.
[09:29] karl
    Someone is sad.
[09:37] etsu
    I never wanted to grow up.
[09:40] etsu
    The older I get,
    the more dirty and ugly I become.
[09:45] etsu
    I don't want to change.
[09:47] etsu
    I want to be a child forever.
SIGN    1704th The tradition!!
    
    
    
    
    Pretty Boy Contest
[09:56] etsu
    I can't even take part in the
    Pretty Boy Contest anymore, either.
[10:00] etsu
    I, who was once called an angel,
[10:03] etsu
    have shed my wings and fallen to earth!
[10:08] etsu
    Who's there?
[10:13] una
    I see. What a terrifying story.
[10:16] shira
    The world is just packed
    full of fear, isn't it?
[10:19] shira
    You'd be better off faithfully
     serving your ruler, then.
[10:23] etsu
    What are you talking about?
[10:31] etsu
    Blorf!
SIGN    Shuzenji Kyotaro
    Born 11/28
    Blood Type: B
    Sagittarius
    Hobbies: Napping and hot baths
    Likes: Dorayaki, spacing out
[10:40] kiri
    Wh-What happened?
[10:42] shu
    Think it got something caught in its throat?
[10:43] kiri
    Like what?
[10:45] karl
    J... J...
[10:46] shu
    Just Google it, asshole?
[10:48] karl
    No!
[10:50] karl
    Someone is sad.
[10:53] waku
    Sad?
[10:55] waku
    I suppose there would be.
[10:57] waku
    There are 7.5 billion people in the world.
[10:59] waku
    They can't all be doing
    cartwheels all the time.
[11:01] karl
    You're wrong! They all need
    to be happy, all the time!
[11:04] waku
    Um, you think he's a cult
    person or something?
[11:08] kiri
    Well, he's not exactly a person...
[11:10] shu
    Either way, he doesn't seem like
    someone we should get involved with.
[11:14] karl
    Wait! Wait!
[11:15] karl
    I can't stand having someone sad out there!
[11:17] karl
    I want to make him happy!
[11:19] shu
    Even though you're an otter?
[11:21] karl
    I'm not an otter! I'm Karls!
[11:23] karl
    I'm a prince!
[11:24] karl
    So c'mon, just work for
    me a little, would you?
[11:27] shu
    What's with that natural exploitation style?
[11:30] karl
    C'mon... Just for a little while!
[11:32] karl
    Please! C'mon! Please!
[11:33] shu
    Sorry.
[11:34] shu
    You can beg me like a louse of an absentee
    husband all you want, but it's not happening.
[11:36] karl
    I'm begging you!
[11:38] kiri
    He's getting awfully friendly.
[11:39] shu
    Nope, not happening.
[11:42] karl
    Darn it... In that case...
[11:51] dogo
    That really hurt!
[11:53] ban
    Hey, are we at school?
[11:54] dogo
    What is this? So bad, so bad, so bad!
[11:57] waku
    Somebody's probably calling the cops now.
[11:59] kiri
    I'm cold out here! I'm gonna catch a cold!
[12:02] karl
    Gentlemen! I'll explain later—
[12:05] shu
    You can't throw people out
    naked in early spring.
[12:08] shu
    I'm very cold right now.
[12:09] karl
    A little exercise would warm you u—
[12:11] shu
    Japanese otters were hunted for their
    pelts and went extinct as a result.
[12:17] shu
    Perhaps you could warm me up.
[12:19] karl
    Warm you up?
[12:21] shu
    As a pelt.
[12:23] mon
    Blorf!
[12:24] all
    Blorf! Blorf! Blorf!
[12:28] dogo
    I can't tell what they're saying...
[12:31] ban
    It sounds like a chorus made up of the
    world's worst elementary school bullies!
[12:36] stu
    Help!
[12:43] kai
    Taste the terror of the tone-deaf "blorf!"
SIGN    Blorf
[12:48] dogo
    Is he behind it?
[12:49] shu
    You got it, Chiro.
[12:51] waku
    He's producing that "blorf" sound everywhere.
[12:57] waku
    Is that the sad person?
[13:00] karl
    Yes!
[13:02] karl
    He's currently beset by anger and suffering!
[13:05] karl
    It's the depths of sorrow!
[13:06] karl
    As a prince, I cannot allow my
    subjects to experience such misery!
[13:10] karl
    As the first prince of Honyala
    Land, Karls de Yutari Honyalala,
[13:13] karl
    I'm going to make him happy!
[13:15] karl
    My knights of happiness!
[13:18] karl
    Come on!
[13:31] karl
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[14:11] shu
    Magic Knight of the Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[14:25] kiri
    Magic Knight of the Stars, Stella Kiss!
[14:38] waku
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[14:51] ban
    Magic Knight of the Snow, Neve Kiss!
[15:04] dogo
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[15:09] dogo
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[15:12] dogo
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[15:14] dogo
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[15:17] dogo
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[15:19] dogo
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[15:22] dogo
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[15:25] dogo
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[15:30] karl
    Knights contract complete!
[15:33] kiri
    Hey, this isn't right!
[15:34] kiri
    I didn't do that willingly!
[15:36] waku
    How did it work, exactly?
[15:38] waku
    Brainwashing? Hypnosis? A dream?
[15:40] ban
    We shouldn't underestimate that otter...
[15:43] shu
    His hand was surprisingly soft.
[15:46] all
    That's your comment?!
[15:47] shu
    Well, it really was soft. And smooth.
[15:53] kiri
    We're flying?
[15:54] waku
    It seems we really have become magic knights.
[16:04] dogo
    Hey, he's coming after us!
[16:06] ban
    No mercy. We'll have to
    friggin' crush that guy!
[16:09] kiri
    We will?
[16:11] ban
    We can hardly stand back and leave the
    students of Binan High School in danger.
[16:16] karl
    Yes, yes! Go, make them happy!
[16:19] dogo
    Hey, you...
[16:19] kar
    I'm not the one you should be looking at!
[16:23] ban
    Get the hell away from us!
[16:29] dogo
    Taishi!
[16:31] karl
    Oh. Those aren't for throwing...
[16:36] waku
    Wow, those things are powerful!
[16:40] kiri
    Wakura-senpai?
[16:45] waku
    Just kidding.
[16:49] kiri
    We did it!
[16:54] kiri
    What do you want?
[16:56] kiri
    Why are you doing this?
[16:58] ban
    Kirishima-senpai, we're under no
    obligation to ask for his motivations.
[17:02] mon
    I'll tell you!
[17:03] dogo
    Hey, whoa, he just started talking!
[17:07] mon
    I was once happy.
[17:10] mon
    But one day, I became unhappy.
[17:13] mon
    Anger and fear. I didn't want to grow up.
[17:13] kiri
    Any idea what he's talking about?
[17:14] mon
    The older I got, the dirtier
    and uglier I would become.
[17:15] dogo
    Not a clue.
[17:15] ban
    Clueless.
[17:16] waku
    You think he's just throwing
    a tantrum or something?
[17:17] mon
    I didn't want to change.
    I wanted to remain a child.
[17:19] mon
    No! I'm generously sharing
    my fear with others!
[17:23] kiri
    Uh, I don't think anyone
    wants a piece of that...
[17:25] mon
    Shut up!
[17:28] shu
    But, hey...
[17:30] shu
    Aren't fear and unhappiness
    and such relative?
[17:34] kiri
    Kyotaro, what are you doing?
[17:36] dogo
    I had a feeling one of us wasn't in the shot...
[17:39] ban
    I thought the layout artists flubbed it.
[17:41] waku
    Just watching, huh?
[17:43] shu
    I was rooting for you. Inside.
[17:46] kiri
    Even after transforming,
    Kyotaro's still Kyotaro...
[17:50] karl
    Wait! Let's hear what Fiore Kiss has to say!
[17:53] dogo
    Fiore?
[17:57] shu
    Well, if you're happy,
    you'll think happiness is best, right?
[18:00] mon
    Shut up! Happiness is the
    first step to depravity!
[18:03] mon
    Fear brings people together!
[18:05] mon
    It makes them take action out
    of anger and dissatisfaction!
[18:07] shu
    Yeah, but I hate being brought together.
[18:10] shu
    Being alone is easier.
[18:13] ban
    He has a point, sort of...
[18:15] dogo
    He's being pretty blunt about it.
[18:17] shu
    So what's wrong with being happy?
[18:19] shu
    Even if it's depravity.
[18:20] mon
    What's this? My fear isn't working...
[18:24] shu
    Well, "blorf" isn't exactly terror-inspiring...
[18:27] kiri
    Kyotaro doesn't have any
    hang-ups at all, does he?
[18:30] mon
    Hang-ups?
[18:32] mon
    You call this a hang-up?
[18:34] karl
    Now, my knights!
[18:36] karl
    Make him happy at once!
[18:43] shu
    Huh? Why are you looking at me?
[18:45] kiri
    Couldn't you help us out a little?
[18:47] ban
    You sound like a wife
    nagging her lazy husband...
[18:49] dogo
    I mean, come on! You got the
    cool red uniform and all!
[18:53] shu
    Being in red doesn't mean
    anything in particular.
[18:56] ban
    In most stories, being red
    means you're the leader.
[19:00] ban
    Red brings to mind sun, flame,
    heat, blazing blood, etc.
[19:04] ban
    That's one theory for why
    it's the leader color.
[19:07] ban
    Another theory suggests that red is the
    first color that a child's eye perceives,
[19:12] ban
    and so they use red, since children
    are more likely to recognize it.
[19:17] kiri
    That's our Taishi.
[19:19] kiri
    He's a font of old lady trivia.
[19:20] ban
    I'm not an old lady!
[19:22] dogo
    Anyway, red has to be the leader.
[19:25] dogo
    Now... Kyotaro-senpai,
    beat that thing already!
[19:29] shu
    Well, I mean, I really don't
    think red is my color...
[19:34] kiri
    I wonder why Kyotaro is our Red, anyway...
[19:37] waku
    Maybe because he was first
    to make the oath kiss?
[19:41] waku
    But since Kyotaro is Red,
    I think it's time he showed his stuff.
[19:44] shu
    I'm not Red. But I guess this
    won't end until I do it.
[19:48] karl
    Now, combine your powers to make him happy!
[19:52] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:53] karl
    Yes!
[19:54] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:55] karl
    Yes!
[19:55] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:56] karl
    Yes!
[19:57] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:58] karl
    Yes!
[19:58] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:59] karl
    Yes!
[20:00] karl
    Let's happy hour!
[20:03] all
    Happy and Set!
[20:16] shu
    Return to happiness!
[20:19] shu
    Happy and Turn!
[20:30] mon
    Feels just like heaven!
[20:38] shu
    Happy End!
[20:41] etsu
    What was I...
[20:44] shu
    So your fear was about your voice changing?
[20:47] shu
    No need to worry about that.
[20:50] shu
    Soon enough, you'll become an
    old man in every way there is.
[20:53] shu
    Not just your voice.
[20:55] etsu
    Old man?
[21:06] shu
    I was trying to encourage him...
[21:08] kiri
    You messed up.
[21:10] waku
    But maybe it's a good chance for
    him to learn more about himself.
[21:15] karl
    Yeah! Because "happy" isn't
    something you search for!
[21:17] karl
    It's something you feel!
[21:19] karl
    You did a great job for your
    first time as magic knights.
[21:22] karl
    Let's work together from now on!
[21:25] ban
    From now on?
[21:26] dogo
    How long do we do this, exactly?
[21:27] karl
    Until either Furanui or I become king,
    and your sentence...
[21:32] karl
    I mean, your contract is fulfilled
    and your Happybraces disappear.
[21:35] dogo
    Happybraces?
[21:36] ban
    Furanui?
[21:38] karl
    Happybraces are those bracelets from before!
[21:42] karl
    Furanui is my little brother.
[21:44] kura
    Brother?
[21:45] fra
    Prince Karls.
[21:49] fra
    I shan't let you defeat me.
[21:52] fra
    I am the true heir to the
    throne of Honyala Land,
[21:54] fra
    and better suited to rule over our subjects.
[21:57] dogo
    Oh wow, so cute!
[21:59] ban
    Though what he's saying is fairly outrageous.
[22:09] fura
    If you attempt to stand against me...
[22:12] fura
    I shall do all I can to eliminate you.
[22:15] fura
    With the Furanui Knights... the Edelstein!
SIGN    HAPPY Recipe
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    Next time: "Let's happy kiss our way to HAPPY Recipe"
SIGN    Princes Karls and Furanui compete to become king of the magical realm, Honyala Land.
SIGN    Happyocracy or reign of fear... Which will rule in the human world?
SIGN    

Season 4

2 - HAPPY Recipe

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] fura
    Prince Karls!
[00:09] karl
    Furanui?
[00:10] karl
    Hey, it's Furanui!
[00:13] karl
    Hey! Hey-ho!
[00:15] shu
    I'm not a watchtower, you know...
[00:19] kiri
    Huh? Ata-kun?
[00:21] kiri
    Hey, aren't you guys our student council?
[00:23] waku
    It does look like them.
[00:25] shu
    Wow, look at those weird outfits.
[00:26] kiri
    Kyotaro, don't say that. It's rude.
[00:30] waku
    And our outfits aren't exactly
    the greatest, anyway.
[00:32] dogo
    Why are they standing all the way up there?
[00:35] man
    I'm interested in knowing
    how they got up there.
[00:39] ma
    The riffraff don't even know what to make of us.
[00:41] ma
    Look at those slack-jawed expressions.
[00:43] dogo
    Hey, Masa! Masa!
[00:45] dogo
    You're gonna slip!
[00:46] ma
    I don't need your opinion!
[00:49] yu
    Today, we're merely testing your prowess.
[00:51] yu
    Don't think you've won yet.
[00:55] dogo
    Are we involved in some kind of competition?
[00:56] man
    Dunno.
[00:57] kar
    Hey, Furanui! When'd you get here?
[01:00] fura
    Prince Karls! This undignified
    conduct of yours...
[01:03] fura
    It's confirmation that you lack
    a king's manners and poise.
[01:07] karl
    What? What's that? I can't hear you!
[01:10] karl
    What's this about hammers and pigeons?
[01:13] fura
    I said nothing about pigeons!
[01:17] shu
    I don't think this has anything
    to do with us, so can we go?
[01:23] yu
    I see you're as oblivious to
    social conventions as ever.
[01:26] yu
    This just reaffirms that the world
    must be ruled with an iron fist.
[01:31] fura
    Yes.
[01:32] fura
    Hear me.
[01:33] fura
    I, Furanui, second prince of Honyala Land,
[01:37] fura
    will conquer this place!
[01:42] dogo
    What's this? Conquer?
[01:44] man
    So he'll be our leader, eh?
[01:46] dogo
    That dog thing, you mean?
[01:48] waku
    Well, if that's what he wants,
    he might as well go for it.
[01:52] kiri
    Are you sure?
[01:53] waku
    Well, we don't know that he'll succeed.
[01:57] waku
    But I am curious about what led you to try.
[02:01] fura
    A fine question.
[02:03] fura
    If you wish to hear why, I'll tell you.
[02:07] shu
    I'm so tired.
SIGN    HAPPY Recipe
[03:45] (Flashback) kamo
    How many years has it been since I first took
[03:49] (Flashback) kamo
    the throne of the magical
    kingdom, Honyala Land?
[03:52] (Flashback) kamo
    I've grown old, and it is time for
    me to pass my throne to another.
[03:58] (Flashback) kamo
    And so, my wonderful sons...
[04:02] (Flashback) kamo
    Furanui and Karls...
[04:05] (Flashback) kamo
    You must go to the tributary of Honyala Land
[04:07] (Flashback) kamo
    and prove you have
    what it takes to be a king.
[04:11] (Flashback) kamo
    Whomsoever I deem worthy
    shall be given the throne.
[04:17] (Flashback) fura
    I understand.
[04:19] (Flashback) fura
    Those of noble blood have
    a duty to lead the people.
[04:22] (Flashback) fura
    I swear I shall prove myself to you,
    Your Majesty.
[04:26] (Flashback) kamo
    I'm counting on you, Furanui.
[04:28] (Flashback) kamo
    Karls, what about you?
[04:31] (Flashback) karl
    Oh, you know I'm up for it!
[04:32] (Flashback) karl
    It sounds neat!
[04:34] (Flashback) karl
    But what exactly does it take to be a king?
[04:38] (Flashback) kamo
    To discover that and make it a part of
    yourself is one of the requirements.
[04:43] (Flashback) kamo
    While keeping my expectations realistic,
    I hope you can do it.
[04:46] (Flashback) kamo
    Minister Wao, go with them,
[04:50] (Flashback) kamo
    and help them if need be.
[04:54] (Flashback) wao
    Leave it to me.
[04:55] (Flashback) wao
    I, Wao, shall carry out my duties faithfully.
[04:59] (Flashback) karl
    So, where is this tributary exactly?
[05:03] (Flashback) kamo
    The human realm... Earth,
    I believe it's called.
[05:15] (Flashback) fura
    Is this it?
[05:23] (Flashback) fura
    I like it!
[05:26] (Flashback) stu
    Who's gonna win this time?
SIGN    1704th The tradition!!
    
    
    
    
    
    Pretty Boy Contest
[05:29] (Flashback) stu
    Aren't you gonna enter?
[05:30] (Flashback) stu
    Me?
[05:32] (Flashback) man
    Anyone who's finished with the
    assignment can go home early.
[05:38] (Flashback) stu
    I'm so tired.
[05:38] (Flashback) stu
    C'mon, not like it has to be perfect.
[05:42] (Flashback) stu
    Yeah, I'm done.
[05:52] (Flashback) fura
    Indolence! Affectation! Deceit!
[05:54] (Flashback) fura
    This world is inundated
    with every vice imaginable!
[05:58] (Flashback) fura
    I must guide these fools to
    a more respectable world!
[06:03] (Flashback) fura
    Rise, Furanui!
[06:04] (Flashback) fura
    Strive, Furanui!
[06:10] (Flashback) fura
    Is that man dead?
[06:17] (Flashback) fura
    He's utterly unguarded...
[06:21] (Flashback) fura
    I could slit his throat and
    he wouldn't even notice...
[06:30] (Flashback) fura
    What is this... this atmosphere
    of comforting indifference...
[06:36] (Flashback) fura
    These waves of sheer calm...
[06:39] (Flashback) fura
    This air of sheer innocuousness...
[06:42] (Flashback) fura
    I feel my motivation slipping away...
[06:49] (Flashback) shi
    Look at you, dead to the world!
[06:53] (Flashback) fura
    Oh no!
[06:54] (Flashback) fura
    Those of noble blood must not allow the lower
    classes to see us in such an inattentive state...
[06:59] (Flashback) fura
    Neglecting the academics that are a student's
    duty to wile the day away in hedonistic slumber...
[07:04] (Flashback) fura
    You should be ashamed, Shuzenji Kyotaro.
[07:08] (Flashback) shu
    Oh? Ata? What's going on?
[07:11] (Flashback) ata
    I could ask you the same question!
[07:14] (Flashback) ata
    Have you been sleeping here all
    day instead of going to class?
[07:18] (Flashback) shu
    Yeah, guess I have.
[07:20] (Flashback) shu
    Ryo-chin's gonna yell at me again.
[07:22] (Flashback) ata
    You don't care unless you're yelled at?
[07:26] (Flashback) shu
    Yeah... I guess that's what it comes down to.
[07:28] (Flashback) ata
    I was a fool to try to talk to you.
[07:31] (Flashback) kyo
    Actually, I think you're pretty smart.
[07:34] (Flashback) ata
    I know that! You don't have to tell me!
[07:36] (Flashback) shu
    Oh... Okay.
[07:37] (Flashback) ata
    I can see that the words "diligence" and
    "discipline" don't exist in your vocabulary.
[07:42] (Flashback) shu
    I guess they don't.
[07:43] (Flashback) ata
    Even sarcasm doesn't work?
[07:45] (Flashback) shu
    I mean, it's true.
[07:47] (Flashback) shu
    You and I are really different people, Ata.
[07:49] (Flashback) ata
    I've had enough!
[07:51] (Flashback) ata
    I was a fool to even approach you.
[07:53] (Flashback) shu
    Huh? I told you, you're not stupid...
[07:56] ata
    He'll never understand anything!
[07:58] ata
    It really gets under my skin!
[08:01] ata
    Every time, every time,
    every time, every time...
[08:03] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro!
[08:05] ata
    I will make you pay!
[08:09] (Flashback) fura
    I see... There may be one sensible
    person in this world, after all.
[08:16] (Flashback) fura
    You there, human!
[08:19] (Flashback) fura
    I have chosen you to be the captain
    of the venerable Furanui Knights.
[08:23] (Flashback) ata
    What's this? A talking chihuahua?
[08:25] (Flashback) fura
    Halt! Did you not hear my order?
[08:31] (Flashback) ata
    What is all this?
[08:33] (Flashback) fura
    Bow before me!
[08:39] (Flashback) fura
    Do not attempt to defy me again.
[08:42] (Flashback) fura
    It is your duty to serve and revere me.
[08:45] (Flashback) ata
    I have a question for you.
[08:47] (Flashback) ata
    What's the trick behind this?
[08:49] (Flashback) fura
    Trick?
[08:51] (Flashback) fura
    I merely need to will things to move.
[08:54] (Flashback) fura
    That is all.
[08:55] (Flashback) ata
    It's magic, then?
[08:58] (Flashback) ata
    Very well.
[08:59] (Flashback) ata
    I have no objection to serving you.
[09:02] (Flashback) fura
    A wise decision.
[09:06] (Flashback) ata
    But as a knight, I require compensation.
[09:11] (Flashback) fura
    What are you asking for?
[09:12] (Flashback) ata
    Your magical power!
[09:16] (Flashback) fura
    Not just wise, but honest, at that.
[09:20] (Flashback) fura
    What is your name?
[09:22] (Flashback) fura
    Ibusuki Ata.
SIGN    Student Council Room
[09:25] (Flashback) masa
    What's this thing? It's so cute!
[09:28] (Flashback) masa
    Oh, I could just die!
[09:31] (Flashback) masa
    I know! Picture time!
[09:33] (Flashback) masa
    I gotta get this on the web!
[09:34] (Flashback) fura
    Insolent fool! I strike you down!
[09:39] (Flashback) ma
    What is that thing? It's creepy!
[09:41] (Flashback) ma
    Freak! Die! Get fat!
[09:43] (Flashback) una
    So, to sum it all up,
[09:46] (Flashback) una
    the student council will become
    this fox-like creature's...
[09:49] (Flashback) fura
    I am Prince Furanui!
[09:51] (Flashback) una
    ...Prince Furanui's knights?
[09:54] (Flashback) una
    That means us?
[09:55] (Flashback) ata
    If you don't like it,
    you don't need to participate.
[09:57] (Flashback) masa
    I don't like it at all!
[09:59] (Flashback) masa
    What will people say if they see you
[10:01] (Flashback) masa
    kowtowing to this little fox thing?
[10:04] (Flashback) masa
    Right, Unazuki-senpai?
[10:06] (Flashback) una
    Nah. If Ata's in, that's enough for me.
[10:11] (Flashback) una
    Maasa, you don't want to?
[10:13] (Flashback) masa
    But... for the student council of Binan
    High School to serve this... shrimpy...
[10:17] (Flashback) fura
    Shrimpy?!
[10:19] (Flashback) fura
    Very well...
[10:20] (Flashback) fura
    I'll take on a form more to your liking, then.
[10:30] (Flashback) fura
    Does this appease you?
[10:33] (Flashback) masa
    No way... Wow... So cool...
[10:36] (Flashback) fura
    Then it's settled.
[10:37] (Flashback) fura
    I, with you, the Furanui Knights,
[10:40] (Flashback) fura
    shall institute systematic
    rule over this world
[10:43] (Flashback) fura
    and discipline its foolish
    and indolent inhabitants.
[10:46] (Flashback) ata
    Indolence is sin!
[10:47] (Flashback) ata
    So is ugliness!
[10:49] (Flashback) ata
    I don't really get it,
[10:51] (Flashback) ata
    but people do need to do what
    the student council tells them.
[10:55] (Flashback) fura
    Then allow me to grant you my power!
[11:02] (Flashback) ata
    This is...
[11:07] (Flashback) fura
    Now rise, Furanui Knights Edelstein!
[11:13] (Flashback) trio
    Die Verwandlung!
[11:16] (Flashback) ata
    That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
[11:19] (Flashback) ata
    Ritter Diamant!
[11:22] (Flashback) una
    Affection and comfort...
[11:24] (Flashback) una
    Ritter Rosenquarz!
[11:28] (Flashback) masa
    Noble and virtuous!
[11:29] (Flashback) masa
    Ritter Amethyst!
[11:33] (Flashback) trio
    We are the Furanui Knights...
[11:35] (Flashback) trio
    Edelstein!
[11:39] fura
    That is my story.
[11:40] fura
    Do you see now?
[11:43] fura
    They're gone!
[11:44] fura
    Did those cowards run away?
[11:46] masa
    I guess they must have lost their nerve!
[11:49] una
    They're over there.
[11:57] waku
    A little harder, more to the right.
[12:00] kiri
    Like this?
[12:02] waku
    Too far to the right, I think.
[12:04] kiri
    I'm sorry!
[12:06] man
    Look that way!
[12:09] man
    That's my 108th straight victory.
[12:10] dogo
    You're a devil...
[12:12] man
    I'm not a devil, and it's not magic.
[12:14] man
    I just know the system
    for winning, that's all.
[12:16] dogo
    Really? Really? Tell me!
[12:18] man
    No. Absolutely not.
[12:19] dogo
    Stingy!
[12:20] karl
    Come back here, you crafty butterfly man!
[12:24] karl
    You can't escape me, you fluttery devil!
[12:27] una
    I think they got sick of our story.
[12:30] masa
    What on earth?
[12:31] masa
    How could they get sick
    of our fabulous story?
[12:35] waku
    Sorry! It just kept going and going, so...
[12:38] dogo
    Also, it had nothing to do with us.
[12:41] man
    Yeah.
[12:42] masa
    It does have something to do with you!
[12:44] una
    We're talking about ruling this place.
[12:47] una
    That means you'll have to do what we say.
[12:51] kiri
    But you're the student council.
    Don't we already do what you say?
[12:55] una
    There'll be severe punishments, too!
[12:57] dogo
    When you say it like, "There'll be cake, too!"
[13:01] dogo
    it's hard to buy into it.
[13:03] uka
    That's a good point.
[13:05] uka
    Well, no big.
[13:07] ata
    Don't let him have that one!
[13:08] all
    Anyway...
[13:14] ata
    Hey!
SIGN    Kirishima Ryoma Born July 18th Blood Type: A Cancer Hobbies: Taking care of others Likes: "Getanha" cakes, cleaning
SIGN    Kiyara Bentaro
[13:29] club
    Kiyara, are you on a diet?
[13:32] ki
    Nah...
[13:33] club
    Well, why aren't you eating?
[13:37] club
    C-Cute!
[13:41] club
    Hey, Kiyara! Kiyara Bentaro!
[13:43] club
    Where are you going?
[13:46] ki
    I... I want to eat giant rice balls!
[13:51] ki
    I want to eat a lunch filled
    with kara-age and ginger pork
[13:54] ki
    and Hamburg steak and tonkatsu...
[13:56] ki
    I love greasy lunches where
    the only color is brown!
[14:01] ki
    Why does everyone else get
    to eat the lunches I want?
[14:10] fura
    I hear your dissatisfaction and anger.
[14:16] ki
    Um, I was just thinking about it...
[14:18] ki
    I know Mom makes those lunches for my sake...
[14:23] fura
    Spread your fear!
[14:24] fura
    Furanui Knights!
[14:27] fura
    Druck!
[14:28] fura
    Mich!
[14:29] fura
    Hart!
[14:32] fura
    An!
[14:47] club
    I'm so hungry...
[14:49] club
    You gotta have rice!
[14:51] club
    Greasy stuff is the best!
[14:53] club
    Everyone knows lunches need to be filling!
[14:56] kai
    Cutesy Lunch Beam!
[15:01] mon
    Stylish! Cute! Low calorie!
[15:05] mon
    Have a taste of my dissatisfaction,
    anger, and fear!
[15:09] kar
    Hey, hey. Why's he scared of
    it being stylish and cute?
[15:14] waku
    Because men like greasy stuff
    that's full of calories.
[15:18] waku
    It's natural he'd be afraid
    of not getting to eat that.
[15:22] man
    At least 500 calories of meat per meal.
[15:24] dogo
    Yeah, yeah, yeah! And if it's meat,
    it's gotta be steak!
[15:28] man
    No, it needs to be shabu-shabu.
[15:30] dogo
    What? That snooty stuff?
[15:32] man
    In its ability to accommodate
    beef, pork, lamb,
[15:35] man
    or even fish, shabu-shabu is truly versatile.
[15:40] shu
    The monster guy there seems pretty bored.
[15:43] waku
    That's right. What were
    we talking about again?
[15:46] shu
    Good question.
[15:47] kiri
    The student council guys were
    saying something, right?
[15:50] shu
    What was it, again?
[15:51] ata
    It was about how indolence is sin!
[15:56] shu
    Was that it?
[15:57] shu
    Thank you, Ata.
[15:59] shu
    That's right.
[16:01] ata
    Not that!
[16:02] ata
    You're exactly the kind of
    people we seek to purge!
[16:05] ata
    I'm going to do everything
    in my power to crush you!
[16:09] ata
    Cutesy Lunch Monster!
[16:11] mon
    Cutesy Lunch Beam!
[16:20] karl
    Look out!
[16:21] karl
    Everyone, transform! Before you're
    turned into cutesy lunches!
[16:25] shu
    Can't I just watch from the sidelines?
[16:27] dogo
    What are you saying, Kyotaro-senpai?
    Do you want to be reduced to an extra?
[16:30] shu
    Yeah, preferably one that's
    cut off by the frame...
[16:32] shu
    Cutesy Lunch Beam!
[16:37] shu
    Kyotaro!
[16:39] shu
    For a moment there,
    I saw a river and a flowerbed...
[16:43] kiri
    This isn't good, Kyotaro!
[16:45] kiri
    Anyway, let's transform!
[16:46] kiri
    That will keep you from getting hurt!
[16:48] kar
    Exactly!
[16:50] dogo
    That's the most backward reason for
    transforming I've ever heard...
[16:53] man
    But he does have a point.
[16:55] man
    Anyway, let's transform.
[16:59] man
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[17:12] man
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[17:20] man
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[17:27] man
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[17:34] man
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[17:42] man
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[17:47] man
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[17:50] man
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[17:52] man
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[17:54] man
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[17:57] man
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[18:00] man
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[18:03] man
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[18:08] shu
    This again?
[18:10] karl
    Don't say "this again"!
[18:12] karl
    Ease his dissatisfaction,
    clear his anger, and make him happy!
[18:17] dogo
    Huh? But how?
[18:19] mon
    You people could never
    understand the way I feel!
[18:23] kiri
    But I do!
[18:24] kiri
    Feeling full is awesome!
[18:26] kiri
    But that's no reason to
    resent the other students!
[18:29] mon
    I don't resent them...
[18:31] kiri
    Then why are you doing this?
[18:33] kiri
    Your mother made those lunches
    to make her son happy!
[18:40] ata
    Is he finished already?
[18:42] ata
    And to fall to Kirishima, of all people?
[18:44] una
    Shall I apply a self-destruct booster?
[18:47] masa
    What do you mean?
[18:48] una
    Hey, Cutesy Lunch Monster!
[18:51] una
    Your mother puts your cutesy
    lunches up on social media every day!
SIGN    Today's lunch! I think it turned out really well, as always
[18:58] both
    Ryoma-senpai!
[19:01] masa
    Why did he self-destruct?
[19:02] una
    He was downplaying his frustration
[19:05] una
    because he thought his mother was
    making those lunches for him.
[19:07] una
    So I shattered that illusion.
[19:10] masa
    I see!
[19:11] masa
    She was really doing it to satisfy herself!
[19:27] waku
    With distrust of others added on top of
    his existing dissatisfaction and anger,
[19:31] waku
    he's now truly invincible.
[19:38] kai
    Cutesy Lunch Bomb!
[19:48] kiri
    Kyotaro?
[19:50] both
    Senpai?
[19:52] kiri
    You threw yourself into danger
    to save your best friend!
[19:55] shu
    No...
[19:56] shu
    It's just, hearing all this talk
    of lunches was making me hungry.
[20:01] shu
    I want to go home already.
[20:03] shu
    Besides, if you don't like
    your mother's lunches,
[20:07] shu
    why not cook for yourself?
[20:10] mon
    C-Cook for myself?
[20:13] karl
    Everyone, now!
[20:14] karl
    Are you happy?
[20:15] karl
    Yes!
[20:16] karl
    Are you happy?
[20:17] karl
    Yes!
[20:17] karl
    Are you happy?
[20:18] karl
    Yes!
[20:19] karl
    Are you happy?
[20:20] karl
    Yes!
[20:21] karl
    Are you happy?
[20:22] karl
    Yes!
[20:22] karl
    Let's happy hour!
[20:25] karl
    Return to happiness!
[20:27] karl
    Happy and Turn!
[20:38] man
    Oh, it's heaven.
[20:40] man
    So nice and warm.
[20:47] shu
    Happy End!
[20:50] ki
    That's right... Just cook for myself.
[20:53] ki
    That's a great idea! My very own lunch!
[21:00] fura
    Well, no matter.
[21:01] fura
    I was merely testing your prowess for today.
[21:04] karl
    Oh, you were?
[21:07] fura
    Await my return.
[21:08] karl
    Awesome!
[21:10] dogo
    There he goes.
[21:12] man
    Well, that was confusing.
[21:13] kiri
    Oh, Kyotaro. Didn't you say you were hungry?
[21:17] kiri
    Let's grab a bite somewhere!
[21:19] shu
    Too much effort.
[21:20] shu
    I want to sleep.
[21:22] shu
    Walking is such a bother.
[21:23] kiri
    Don't be like that!
[21:25] karl
    Happy Powder!
[21:29] dogo
    What's all this shiny stuff?
[21:31] karl
    Yup! It erases the memories of
    people who saw stuff!
[21:35] man
    Destroying the evidence?
[21:40] kiri
    Kyotaro, don't fall asleep here.
[21:44] shu
    Just five more minutes.
[21:45] kiri
    Absolutely not!
[21:46] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[21:48] dogo
    Um, there's something I've been wondering.
[21:51] dogo
    Why do we take a hot bath every day?
[21:53] man
    Good question.
[21:56] kiri
    Kind of an old habit, I guess?
[21:59] man
    Old habit?
[22:01] karl
    Hot baths make me happy!
[22:03] karl
    I'm so glad I came to the human world.
[22:06] waku
    Are hot baths the only thing
    our world has over yours?
[22:10] karl
    Happy, happy!
[22:15] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[22:16] kiri
    Kyotaro! I told you not to sleep here!
[22:19] kiri
    Kyotaro! Kyotaro!
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    HAPPY Ice Cream
SIGN    Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Ice Cream"!
SIGN    You know how there are things you see every day, but you don't actually know what they're called...
SIGN    ...so you just say "the thing" or "the whatever-it-is"? Next episode is about that kind of stuff.
SIGN    

Season 4

3 - HAPPY Ice Cream

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] karl
    --
[00:00] mon
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] una
    --
[00:05] shu
    Oh, that's right...
[00:07] shu
    What was that thing called again?
[00:09] shu
    What thing?
[00:10] shu
    You know... that thing for
    making oyakodon or katsudon.
[00:15] shu
    The pan-like thing.
[00:17] wa
    It's called an oyako pan, I believe.
[00:19] man
    Oyako pan.
[00:21] man
    A wide, shallow, flat-bottomed
    pan with a handle.
[00:24] man
    Its form is the height of specialization,
[00:27] man
    configured for creating the
    most professional of meals.
[00:32] dogo
    But, but, but...
[00:33] dogo
    An oyako pan to make oyakodon?
[00:35] dogo
    The name feels way too obvious.
[00:38] man
    Indeed, it may be a bit predictable.
[00:41] shu
    So... what was that other thing called?
[00:43] kiri
    What "that thing" do you mean this time?
[00:45] shu
    You know, the... white
    thing, kind of square...
[00:49] kiri
    I know! Sugar cubes?
[00:51] shu
    No...
[00:53] wa
    Melamine sponges, maybe?
[00:55] dogo
    Oh, I know those!
[00:56] dogo
    I use them, too!
[00:58] dogo
    We sure are in sync, Nanao-senpai!
[01:02] shu
    Not that... You know, the thing.
[01:05] shu
    The thing you put vegetables
    and meat in to keep them cool.
[01:09] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai...
[01:10] dogo
    You're not talking about
    a refrigerator, are you?
[01:13] shu
    Oh. Yeah, that's it.
[01:16] man
    Refrigerator...
[01:18] man
    An electrical appliance designed to preserve
    food and beverages at low temperature.
[01:22] dogo
    H-Hang on a minute!
[01:24] dogo
    Taishi, do we really need that explanation?
[01:26] man
    I guess we don't.
[01:27] kiri
    Kyotaro...
[01:28] kiri
    Aren't you a little worried
    you're forgetting refrigerators?
[01:33] kyo
    I feel refreshed.
[01:37] man
    Shuzenji-senpai!
[01:38] dogo
    Don't fall asleep in the bath!
[01:41] dogo
    Senpai!
[01:43] karl
    H-Help!
SIGN    HAPPY Ice Cream
SIGN    Year 3 Class C
[03:28] una
    Seems like we're enemies now, huh, Nanao?
[03:31] waku
    I guess that's what it shakes out to, yeah.
[03:33] una
    The magic knights who bring happiness, huh?
[03:35] (Flashback) all
    Happy Kiss!
[03:39] waku
    Right back at you.
[03:40] (Flashback) all
    Furanui Knights...
[03:41] (Flashback) all
    Edelstein!
[03:45] una
    Well, you seem to be having a lot of fun.
[03:48] waku
    I guess.
[03:49] waku
    You need to have fun when you're
    looking after your juniors.
[03:53] una
    You say you're looking after them,
     but I know you're probably messing with them.
[03:57] waku
    I guess you must have
    your hands full, too, huh?
[03:59] una
    Well, my kids are working hard.
[04:03] una
    When the kids are working hard,
    you've gotta have their backs.
SIGN    Student Council Room
SIGN    Instructions 1: An orderly lifestyle! 2: Incredible productivity! 3: Solidarity in following the ruler's commands!
[04:16] fura
    An orderly lifestyle.
[04:18] fura
    Incredible productivity.
[04:20] fura
    Solidarity in following the ruler's commands.
[04:23] fura
    These are Binan High School's new doctrines.
[04:26] fura
    In order to enforce them, first we need
    to formulate stricter school rules.
[04:30] ata
    I'm sorry to say it, but the school
    rules may not be sufficient.
[04:34] una
    Yeah.
[04:35] una
    Even if we make them stricter,
    I doubt anyone will follow them.
[04:39] ---
    True, true.
[04:40] fura
    What did you say?!
[04:43] masa
    Aw, don't get mad.
[04:46] masa
    Here, Maasa cookies!
[04:47] fura
    M-Maasa cookies?
[04:50] shiro
    I make them really good.
[04:52] fura
    W-Well, if you insist...
[04:57] fura
    Delicious!
[04:59] shira
    You can have as many as you want.
[05:03] fura
    I detect the scent of unhappiness nearby.
[05:11] all
    See you tomorrow, Yoshida, Kogawa!
[05:16] haku
    Sorry...
[05:18] yama
    Oh, it's you.
[05:20] yama
    I think the name was...
[05:24] yama
    Yamazaki, Tanaka! See you later!
[05:26] yama
    Take care on the way home!
[05:28] yama
    Do your homework! Brush your teeth!
[05:30] yama
    What is this, elementary school?
SIGN    Usui Hajime
[05:37] sign
    I see...
[05:38] sign
    No one in this school can say my name.
[05:42] sign
    I've always struggled to make an impression,
    ever since I was a child.
[05:45] sign
    But I'm so invisible,
[05:48] sign
    everyone just calls me "you" and "hey there."
[05:53] sign
    Why won't anyone say my name?
[05:56] sign
    Why won't they remember it?
[05:57] sign
    Why won't they try to learn my name?!
[06:00] man
    Here. Strawberry and mango, is it?
[06:02] man
    Thank you!
[06:04] sign
    Don't forget to close the door!
[06:05] haku
    Hey there. Coming in.
[06:07] man
    Oh, the kid from Binan High.
[06:09] man
    I've been waiting.
[06:10] man
    I need to head out for a bit.
[06:12] man
    Could you hold down the fort?
[06:14] haku
    Right...
[06:15] man
    Well, time to get changed!
SIGN    Usui Hajime
[06:22] haku
    Even at my job, no one
    calls me by my name.
[06:26] haku
    Even though it's written right here!
[06:28] haku
    It's right freaking here!
[06:32] una
    Excuse me. Soft-serve please.
[06:34] una
    Right! Coming up...
[06:37] una
    Hey, aren't you the student council?
[06:40] una
    Which should I get?
SIGN    Ultra Kiwi Spicy Mixed Soft-Serve
SIGN    Ultra Trend Mix Southern Mango
SIGN    Rush Fluffy Ultra Mix Green Tea
SIGN    Super Double Sweet Strawberry Mix
[06:44] ma
    I want the one with strawberry stuff!
[06:48] ma
    Okay.
[06:48] ma
    The super double sweet strawberry mix, right?
[06:53] una
    Are you the type who always reads the
    exact name of everything on the menu?
[06:58] haku
    Y-Yeah... Because, I mean,
    those are their names.
[07:03] una
    Yeah, I hear you. Totally.
[07:05] masa
    G-Good point.
[07:08] ata
    The humans of this world avert their eyes
    from the truth and substitute whatever suits them.
[07:13] ata
    Wouldn't you like to set them straight?
[07:16] haku
    I would, but...
[07:19] fura
    Then I'll give you that role.
[07:24] fura
    Druck!
[07:25] fura
    Mich!
[07:26] fura
    Hart!
[07:28] fura
    An!
[07:40] man
    Huh? He's gone.
[07:42] man
    Hey, you kids!
[07:43] man
    Have you seen our part-timer anywhere?
[07:46] shi
    He has been assigned the role
    of demonstrating our king's power.
[07:50] man
    But I need him around!
[07:53] mas
    Well, what are we supposed to do about it?
[07:56] man
    If you kids took our part-timer somewhere,
[07:59] man
    I'll need one of you to fill in for him.
[08:01] man
    Fill in?
[08:04] ma
    Unazuki-senpai?
[08:05] una
    Well, it must be done.
[08:07] man
    You'll do it? Thank you!
[08:10] man
    Well, good luck!
[08:11] man
    Yahoo!
[08:14] ata
    Unazuki-san, are you sure about this?
[08:16] una
    Yeah. Sure am!
[08:17] ma
    What a shock!
[08:21] una
    What do you think?
[08:22] ata
    What do we think? Well...
[08:24] ma
    Senpai, it looks great on you! Really good!
[08:28] dogo
    Hey, the student council.
[08:30] dogo
    The Defense Club!
[08:31] dogo
    You guys are serving ice cream?
[08:35] dogo
    Hey, have you got a part-time job here?
[08:37] una
    Step right up!
[08:48] una
    Well, can I get you guys some soft-serve?
[08:51] waku
    Sounds good!
[08:52] waku
    Let's get some, everyone.
[08:54] waku
    Um... This.
[08:57] waku
    Taiju, I'll take one of those.
[08:58] una
    Got it!
[09:02] shu
    Then I'll have that one!
[09:04] shu
    Thanks!
[09:05] shu
    And I'll have this one!
[09:06] shu
    Righto!
[09:06] dogo
    Then I'll have this one!
[09:08] dogo
    And I'll have this one!
[09:09] dogo
    I'll have this strawberry one!
[09:13] shu
    This is delicious!
[09:14] ---
    I want this one.
[09:15] ---
    Alright.
[09:17] una
    Ata, go on, choose.
[09:19] ata
    No... Thank you.
[09:21] wa
    Don't be like that! Here you are!
[09:24] ata
    I-If you insist.
[09:27] dogo
    Senpai, Senpai! Ryoma-senpai!
[09:30] dogo
    How did we all end up eating ice
    cream together like pals, exactly?
[09:34] kiri
    This soft-serve is great!
[09:36] man
    I'm curious to know why
    Unazuki-senpai and Wakura-senpai
[09:40] man
    are so good at making soft-serve ice cream.
[09:44] kiri
    Oh, that's right.
[09:45] kiri
    You first years don't know about that yet.
[09:47] kiri
    The cultural festival soft-serve legend.
[09:49] dogo
    What's that?
[09:51] kiri
    I've only heard the rumors, myself...
[09:53] kiri
    Right, Kyotaro?
[09:55] shu
    So good...
[09:58] man
    What are you talking about?
[10:01] kiri
    From what I've been told,
[10:02] kiri
    when Unazuki-senpai and
    Wakura-senpai were first years,
[10:06] kiri
    their names were drawn to run the
    soft-serve stall at the cultural festival.
SIGN    Soft-Serve Ice Cream
[10:11] sign
    With those two making soft-serve together,
     the stall did big business!
[10:16] an
    I never knew they'd done something like that.
[10:21] dogo
    So many people!
[10:26] shu
    I've got this pounding in my head...
[10:28] shu
    Oh, I know that!
[10:30] shu
    The cold makes your head pound, right?
[10:32] mon
    Excuse me!
[10:34] mon
    Don't you know what that
    phenomenon is called?
SIGN    Wakura Nanao Born September 17th Blood Type: AB Virgo Hobbies: Tea Likes: Japanese sweets, teasing others
[10:44] sign
    Hey, did you hear me?
[10:46] sign
    What's the phenomenon called where eating
    cold things makes your head pound?
[10:50] dogo
    I never even thought about it...
[10:50] shu
    Ah, it still hurts.
[10:53] kai
    It's known as... an ice cream headache!
[10:56] kai
    That's the official medical term, too!
[11:00] waku
    So what?
[11:02] kiri
    Oh, Wakura-senpai.
[11:03] kiri
    Don't you have to stay behind the counter?
[11:06] waku
    We sold so much we ran out of ingredients.
[11:08] dogo
    Just like the cultural festival
     soft-serve legend!
[11:11] shu
    Oh, the pounding's gone away.
[11:13] kiri
    Glad to hear it, Kyotaro. Shall we, then?
[11:16] kyo
    Yeah. Let's hit the Kurotama Bath.
[11:19] mon
    Hey, wait! You guys!
[11:21] mon
    Why are you leaving?
[11:23] shu
    Why?
[11:24] man
    Because we're done here, that's why.
[11:35] mon
    Then... do you know the name of this?
[11:41] shu
    Oh, that thing they put in books.
[11:43] mon
    Don't call it "that thing"! Its
    official name is "pagemarker"!
[11:48] mon
    Next up... this!
[11:53] kiri
    The thing you serve curry in?
[11:54] mon
    It's called a gravy boat!
[11:56] mon
    And these?
[11:59] dogo
    Hey, those green crinkly things!
[12:01] mon
    Wrong! They're called baran!
[12:03] mon
    How about this?
[12:06] man
    The tool you use for goldfish-scooping.
[12:08] man
    The official name is...
[12:10] mon
    Poi!
[12:11] man
    Correct.
[12:12] mon
    Yeah! I got it!
[12:14] mon
    Wait! I'm the one asking the questions here!
[12:16] mon
    Now, these!
[12:19] kiri
    The things you use to dig out crab meat!
[12:21] mon
    No, they're—
[12:25] shu
    So, what's the point?
[12:27] dogo
    I know!
[12:29] dogo
    Are you one of those things they use
    to hold bread bags and stuff shut?
[12:32] mon
    Oh, here we go again!
    It's the phrase I hear all the time!
[12:35] mon
    That's right!
[12:36] mon
    When anyone looks at me,
[12:38] mon
    they just say, "Oh, it's that thing
    they use to hold bread bags shut."
[12:42] mon
    Why "that thing"?
[12:42] mon
    Is "that thing" enough for you?
[12:43] kiri
    We've got ourselves a real
    pain in the butt here.
[12:46] shu
    Yeah...
[12:47] shu
    Let's have the student council
    deal with whatever his problem is...
[12:51] dogo
    Hey, they're gone!
[12:53] kiri
    So... we have to deal with him ourselves?
[12:55] dogo
    Can we not?
[12:57] man
    It does seem troublesome...
[12:58] waku
    What'll we do, Kyotaro-kun?
[13:03] shu
    Good question...
[13:05] mon
    Well... I see you're still struggling
    to figure out my name, eh?
[13:10] all
    No, no, no.
[13:19] mon
    It's "bag closure"!
[13:22] shu
    So?
[13:23] mon
    What?!
[13:24] mon
    Aren't you elated to hear my proper name?
[13:27] mon
    Doesn't it make you happy?
[13:29] shu
    Sorry, but no.
[13:32] man
    Yeah, not at all.
[13:33] dogo
    Nope, nope, nothing.
[13:38] mon
    How can it be...
[13:41] mon
    In that case, I, Bag Closure Monster,
[13:44] mon
    shall cure your depraved souls!
[13:50] mon
    Tyndall!
[13:55] mon
    The phenomenon in which
    light warps when passing
[13:57] mon
    through tree leaves is known
    as the Tyndall effect!
[14:02] mon
    Are you listening?!
[14:04] mon
    It's the Tyndall effect!
[14:05] mon
    Tyndall!
[14:09] mon
    Tyndall! Tyndall! Tyndall!
[14:15] mon
    I think he just likes saying "Tyndall"...
[14:25] mon
    The warped light...
[14:31] karl
    He's wallowing in the depths
    of anger and suffering!
[14:35] karl
    We need to make him happy!
[14:49] ---
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[15:27] karl
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[15:40] karl
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[15:53] karl
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[16:07] karl
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[16:19] karl
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[16:25] karl
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[16:27] karl
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[16:29] karl
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[16:32] karl
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[16:34] karl
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[16:37] karl
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
SIGN    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[16:45] ---
    Knights contract complete!
[16:48] kiri
    He made us do the full routine again...
[16:50] ban
    It appears we have no choice in the matter.
[16:54] kai
    Then I'll give you this!
[16:57] kai
    Pablo Diego José Francisco de
    Paula Juan Nepomuceno María
[17:01] kai
    de los Remedios Cipriano de la
    Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso!
[17:09] dogo
    What's that?!
[17:11] man
    It's the real name of the
    painter Pablo Picasso!
[17:13] wa
    Yes, they say his name was so long,
    he couldn't even say it himself!
[17:18] kai
    That's right!
[17:20] kai
    You didn't know it, did you?
[17:21] kai
    Boy, you're stupid!
[17:24] dogo
    Seriously, what's the point of all this?
[17:26] mon
    I really hate people who don't
    know the proper names of things,
[17:29] mon
    and just muddle through without caring!
[17:32] mon
    My name is not "that thing"!
[17:34] mon
    It's bag closure!
[17:36] mon
    Why won't anyone call me by my name?
[17:38] mon
    I remember everyone else's name!
[17:42] kiri
    Oh, I know this.
[17:43] kiri
    Is it the "I remember everyone's birthday,
[17:45] kiri
    but no one remembers mine" resentment thing?
[17:50] kai
    You...
[17:52] kai
    You said "the thing" again!
[17:54] kai
    Hey! Hey!
[17:55] man
    Kirishima-senpai, please
    don't make him angry.
[17:57] kai
    Are you listening? Hey!
[17:59] kiri
    Huh? Did I upset him?
[18:01] kiri
    I wonder why, Kyotaro...
[18:04] kiri
    Kyotaro's missing again!
[18:07] mon
    You're all really going to pay now!
[18:10] mon
    Super Magical Bag Closure Beam!
[18:13] shu
    But... are names really that important?
[18:18] shu
    This thing apparently has
    some crazy long name,
[18:21] shu
    but nobody says it.
[18:23] mon
    Yeah, and what I hate is
    people who just accept that!
[18:27] shu
    But
[18:30] ---
    everyone still thinks it's delicious,
[18:31] shu
    and they come back to order it again.
[18:34] shu
    Isn't it better for people to think you're great,
     rather than to remember your name?
[18:40] shu
    With you, too...
[18:42] shu
    Everyone remembers the thing they
    use to keep bread bags closed.
[18:46] shu
    I think that's much better than
    everyone knowing your name,
[18:50] shu
    but no one knowing what you're good for.
[18:56] karl
    My knights of happiness...
[18:58] karl
    Lift his unhappiness and make him happy!
[19:03] shu
    That was delicious.
[19:06] karl
    Now, use your power to make him happy!
[19:09] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:10] karl
    Yes!
[19:11] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:12] karl
    Yes!
[19:12] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:13] karl
    Yes!
[19:14] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:15] karl
    Yes!
[19:16] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:17] karl
    Yes!
[19:17] karl
    Let's happy hour!
[19:20] karl
    Happy and Turn!
[19:33] karl
    Return to happiness!
[19:36] karl
    Happy and Turn!
[19:47] mon
    If I'm "that," if I'm "me"...
    Maybe it's okay either way.
[19:55] shu
    Happy End!
[19:57] karl
    Happy Powder!
[20:07] haku
    Huh? What was I doing here...
[20:10] kiri
    Hey, you're that third year.
[20:12] kiri
    What was it again...?
[20:14] haku
    I'm Usui Hajime.
[20:18] haku
    But it's okay. You don't
    have to remember my name.
[20:21] haku
    As long as you don't forget
    that I was here at Binan High.
[20:25] shu
    No, I'll try to remember.
[20:28] shu
    Um, what was your name, again?
[20:31] haku
    No, seriously, it's fine...
[20:34] haku
    Excuse me!
[20:36] haku
    So long!
[20:38] karl
    Everyone's happy again today!
[20:41] karl
    Now, let's go home!
[20:52] shu
    I'm exhausted. Can't move.
[20:55] man
    I've just ended up saying "the thing" again.
[20:58] man
    Kirishima-senpai.
[20:59] man
    If you say "the thing" again,
[21:01] man
    that guy's going to show up
    and tell you to say the proper name.
[21:06] dogo
    Taishi, you ended up not
    remembering his name either!
[21:09] karl
    Everyone, look, look!
[21:11] karl
    I made a Karls Original happi coat!
[21:14] karl
    Wear this happi and say...
[21:15] karl
    Are you happy?
[21:17] karl
    Get it?!
[21:20] waku
    I'm overheating.
[21:22] waku
    I think I'll get out now.
[21:23] waku
    Same here.
[21:26] karl
    C'mon, it's a happi! Hey! Hey!
[21:31] usu
    Thank you for coming.
[21:38] waku
    Could I have one of those?
[21:39] usu
    Yes!
[21:40] una
    I'd like one of those, too.
[21:43] usu
    Right! Thanks for coming!
[21:54] waku
    Another rough day, huh?
[21:56] una
    Same to you.
[21:58] una
    How long is this gonna go on?
[22:00] waku
    Who can say?
[22:03] una
    You say that, but you seem
    to be really enjoying it.
[22:07] waku
    Certainly not.
[22:15] waku
    Well, see you again, enemy.
[22:17] una
    Sure thing, enemy.
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    It's A Wonderful HAPPY
SIGN    Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "It's A Wonderful HAPPY"!
SIGN    There's gold buried on Mt. Binan?! And for some reason, the Defense Club is digging it up...
SIGN    Meanwhile, the student council just watches. What will they find in the end?!
SIGN    

Season 4

4 - It's A Wonderful HAPPY

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] yone
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
SIGN    It's A Wonderful HAPPY
[01:40] ban
    There is! There is, I tell you, there is!
[01:42] dogo
    There is not! I'm telling you, there's not!
[01:45] dogo
    There is!
[01:45] dogo
    There's not!
[01:46] waku
    Looks like another fun
    little pointless argument.
[01:46] dogo
    There is!
[01:47] dogo
    There's not!
[01:47] ---
    There is!
[01:48] dogo
    Not, not, not, not, not!
[01:50] dogo
    Is, is, is, is, is!
[01:50] kiri
    That's close friends for you.
[01:52] ban
    I'm telling you... there is, absolutely!
[01:56] dogo
    I'm telling you, there's not, no question!
[01:58] karl
    Oh? This atmosphere is less than happy...
[02:01] waku
    It's just a difference of opinion,
[02:03] waku
    over an utterly trivial subject.
[02:05] kiri
    The short version is, they're arguing about
    whether there's buried treasure or not.
[02:09] karl
    Why would you dig up gold?
[02:10] karl
    Just make some with magic!
[02:12] kiri
    Come on...
[02:14] ban
    Kirishima-senpai, are you
    in the "treasure" camp?
[02:17] dogo
    You're in the "no treasure" camp, right?
[02:18] kiri
    I don't really...
[02:19] ban
    You're in the "treasure" camp, right?
[02:20] dogo
    The "no treasure" camp, right?
[02:21] waku
    I suspect he's more in the "doesn't care" camp.
[02:24] kiri
    That's it! That's just how I feel!
[02:26] shu
    But if there was buried treasure,
    what would happen to it?
[02:30] kiri
    He's awake.
[02:31] waku
    Were you listening in your sleep?
[02:33] shu
    I heard it from deep in my stupor, I guess.
[02:35] shu
    It resonated somewhere
    inside of me, I guess...
[02:39] shu
    But what would happen if
    you found buried treasure?
[02:42] kiri
    Would it be treated as lost property?
[02:44] waku
    Wouldn't it belong to the state?
[02:47] waku
    Or to whoever owns the local land...
[02:50] shu
    Though, if we're dividing
    into "cool" and "ugh" camps,
[02:52] shu
    I'm in the "it would be
    cool if it existed" camp.
[02:55] ban
    Exactly! That's precisely my point!
[02:58] ban
    It's about whether it's cool or not!
[03:00] ban
    There's a non-zero percent
    chance that it exists.
[03:03] ban
    That's where the sense of adventure comes in!
[03:05] ban
    And that's what makes it cool!
[03:08] dogo
    The likelihood is still
    pretty much zero, though.
[03:11] dogo
    I think they're just digging
    because it means big ratings!
[03:14] man
    And you've just dug your
    own grave there, Ichiro.
[03:17] man
    The fact it gets ratings
[03:19] man
    is proof that a lot of people
    have the same sense of adventure that I do!
[03:22] dogo
    That's unrelated to the point of whether the
    buried treasure actually exists or not!
[03:26] dogo
    You're moving the goalposts!
[03:28] dogo
    The question is if it exists or not!
[03:29] dogo
    And it absolutely does not exist!
[03:32] ban
    No, it does exist!
[03:33] ban
    Does not!
[03:34] shu
    Aren't their arguments fun?
[03:34] ban
    Does too!
[03:36] bei
    It's not fun at all!
[03:38] bei
    A-As far as I'm concerned,
    there's no buried treasure!
[03:41] bei
    And that's my only word on the matter!
[03:45] shu
    He ran out, covered in soap suds...
[03:47] waku
    I guess he didn't like the
    talk about buried treasure.
[03:51] dogo
    Hey, isn't that the transfer student...
SIGN    Yonekura Kingo
[03:59] (Flashback) sign
    Hello.
[04:00] (Flashback) sign
    My name is Yonekura Kingo.
[04:02] sign
    Yonekura Kingo!
[04:04] (Flashback) sign
    Not "Maizo Kingo"!
[04:10] [SONG] sign
    Buried Treasure (maizo kin), Go!
[04:13] shu
    Oh, it's started already. Buried Treasure Go.
[04:16] ban
    That's right. Today's a
    two hour special, right?
[04:19] shu
    Was it?
[04:22] ban
    Yonekura...
[04:23] yone
    I came to the public bath to avoid that
    aggravating thing on the TV, and yet...
SIGN    Mysterious Staircase
    Discovered
[04:29] yone
    I guess I can't escape the
    curse of the buried treasure!
[04:34] kiri
    Buried treasure curse, huh?
    That sounds pretty bad.
[04:38] kiri
    Did one of your ancestors
    bury treasure somewhere?
[04:40] yone
    It's nothing so serious.
[04:42] dogo
    Then... do you get teased
    about your name a lot?
[04:45] dogo
    Like, "Hey, Maizo Kin-go!"
[04:49] yone
    It's nothing so shallow, either.
[04:53] yone
    What I can't stand is... my father...
[04:56] yone
    He gave me this name because of
    his sense of dreams and adventure.
[05:00] kiri
    What?
[05:02] yone
    My father...
[05:04] yone
    He's a freelance director who pursues UMA,
    buried treasure, and other mysterious things.
SIGN    Mt. Binan
[05:09] sign
    We even moved here in his
    search for buried treasure.
[05:12] (Flashback) dad
    Kingo, I think we'll get to live
    in the next city for a long time.
[05:17] (Flashback) dad
    I've got a good feeling about it.
[05:19] (Flashback) dad
    This time, we're hitting the jackpot!
[05:21] (Flashback) yone
    Dad!
[05:28] yone
    He's just single-mindedly chasing his dream.
[05:31] shu
    So he came here to dig up treasure?
[05:33] yone
    Yes.
[05:34] yone
    The dig shoots last six months at least,
[05:37] yone
    and a year or two at most.
[05:39] yone
    Because of that, I've had to
    change schools eight times.
[05:43] dogo
    No way!
[05:44] man
    Your father can't just leave
    you at home when he travels?
[05:47] yone
    It's just me and him, so...
[05:49] yone
    I hear that, long ago, my mother encouraged
    his dreams and adventures, but...
[05:53] yone
    It seems that from the time he named
    me Kingo, her heart began to break.
[05:59] yone
    The day I was born, my father
    was off digging up treasure.
[06:04] yone
    He wasn't there the day I started crawling.
[06:07] yone
    Naturally, he was AWOL when
    I took my first steps.
[06:11] yone
    Even the day I got pneumonia and almost died,
[06:14] [SONG] dad
    Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
[06:15] yone
    he was digging for treasure in some hole
    where he couldn't get a phone signal!
[06:20] yone
    As a result, my first words were...
[06:23] (Flashback) kid
    Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
[06:29] yone
    That seems to have been her breaking point.
[06:32] yone
    That's when my mother left.
[06:34] man
    I'm sorry. I really
    shouldn't have asked...
[06:38] yone
    It's okay.
[06:40] yone
    I'm just so glad you heard me out.
[06:43] yone
    I thought it would be too hard to understand,
[06:44] yone
    so I've never told anyone before.
[06:47] dogo
    I guess it would be hard to explain.
[06:50] waku
    But your story is completely understandable.
[06:53] waku
    I mean, it just makes sense.
[06:55] kiri
    It must be pretty rough
    going for you, Yonekura-kun.
[06:58] yone
    Lately, it's gone beyond rough.
[07:01] yone
    It's more like something's
    boiling up inside me...
[07:06] yone
    I'm very sorry for my outburst earlier!
[07:13] karl
    Happy! Happy!
[07:17] stu
    Hey, I hear the buried treasure
    shoot has started up on Mt. Binan.
[07:22] stu
    What a laugh! There's no treasure up there.
[07:24] stu
    You think those TV people really
    believe the crap they peddle?
[07:27] stu
    They know it's all bull, but they go along
    with the dig because it's their job, right?
[07:32] yone
    That's not true!
[07:34] yone
    Some people dig because they
    really believe it exists!
[07:36] sut
    Are you kidding?
[07:37] sut
    That's pretty cringe-worthy...
[07:39] yone
    That's true.
[07:40] yone
    It is indeed cringe-worthy.
[07:42] ---
    That's why I say with confidence:
    Buried treasure does not exist!
[07:48] ---
    But the worst part of it all...
[07:52] ---
    ...is you people who talk about it and watch
    it on TV, without any sense of responsibility!
[07:58] stu
    What's with you, Yonekura?
[08:00] stu
    Since when does watching TV
    require a sense of responsibility?
[08:03] stu
    C'mon, let's go.
[08:09] yone
    Wh-What do you people want?
[08:11] fura
    Your resentment is genuine.
[08:14] masa
    Yeah, I agree!
[08:16] una
    I can tell. It's natural
    that you'd be resentful.
[08:19] ata
    It's irresponsible to watch
    TV just because it amuses you.
[08:22] ata
    Would you like to correct that?
[08:26] yone
    Y-Yes, I would.
[08:32] yone
    Die Verwandlung!
[08:35] yone
    That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
[08:38] yone
    Ritter Diamant!
[08:41] yone
    Affection and comfort!
[08:43] yone
    Ritter Rosenquarz!
[08:47] yone
    Noble and virtuous!
[08:48] yone
    Ritter Amethyst!
[08:52] yone
    We are the Furanui Knights...
[08:54] yone
    Edelstein!
[08:57] yone
    Druck!
[08:58] yone
    Mich!
[08:59] yone
    Hart!
[09:01] yone
    An!
SIGN    Manza Taishi Born September 30th Blood Type: A Libra Hobbies: Reading Likes: Reciting trivia, blueberries
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[09:18] kiri
    I hear the Mt. Binan buried
    treasure shoot is starting today.
[09:23] ban
    He reacts to buried treasure, at least.
[09:25] dogo
    Even though it totally doesn't exist.
[09:28] waku
    That reminds me.
[09:29] waku
    We buried a time capsule on Mt. Binan when
    we were in elementary school, didn't we?
[09:33] kiri
    Yeah, we did that in my year, too!
[09:36] waku
    I've completely forgotten what
    I put in it now, of course...
[09:42] ban
    What's wrong, Ichiro?
[09:43] dogo
    N-Nothing...
[09:45] dogo
    I-It's obvious there's no
    buried treasure up there...
[09:48] dogo
    B-But why don't we go to watch the shoot?
[09:51] ban
    I knew you'd be interested.
[09:53] dogo
    Shut up, Taishi.
[09:55] shu
    Let's go. I kind of want to see it.
[09:58] kiri
    Kyotaro?
[09:59] kiri
    Isn't this usually his afternoon nap-time?
[10:03] waku
    Let's all go and see, then.
[10:05] karl
    Sounds great!
[10:07] karl
    We'll have a better chance of making someone
    happy there than by hanging around in here!
[10:11] dogo
    Um... Nanao-senpai, you're going too?
[10:14] waku
    Do you have a problem with that?
[10:15] dogo
    No, no! Not at all...
[10:22] cam
    We are rolling!
[10:23] so
    Sound okay.
[10:25] ad
    Three... two...
[10:28] kin
    Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
[10:31] kin
    Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
[10:34] rep
    So, it's begun.
[10:36] rep
    The director is taking the
    pickax in his own hand
[10:38] rep
    in pursuit of the dream of buried treasure!
[10:41] kiri
    Kyotaro?
[10:44] shu
    Hey.
[10:45] shu
    Give it to me straight.
     Is there really buried treasure here?
[10:49] pro
    Oh, well... you know I
    can't say that there isn't.
[10:52] pro
    I have our ratings to worry about, after all!
[10:56] shu
    Does that mean...?
[10:57] dogo
    He's basically saying there isn't.
[10:59] ban
    No, a miracle could still happen!
[11:02] ban
    Miracles are miracles because
    they do sometimes happen!
[11:05] waku
    But that Yonekura Kingo kid is the
    one jerked around by the "miracle."
[11:12] kiri
    When you put it that way, it is pretty sad...
[11:15] pro
    Oh, I know!
[11:16] pro
    We're a little bit short-handed.
[11:19] pro
    Could I ask you to turn your youthful
    passion towards digging up treasure?
[11:24] dogo
    No. I don't have any youthful passion.
[11:27] dogo
    I'm also in the "no treasure" camp.
[11:30] shu
    Let's try it.
[11:30] dogo
    Seriously, Kyotaro-senpai?!
[11:32] shu
    I mean, the digging itself
    sounds like a pain in the neck,
[11:35] shu
    but if we do find something
     I could sleep the rest of my life away.
[11:39] kiri
    Now that's a shock! To see Kyotaro
    getting fired up over something...
[11:42] ban
    I'm starting to want to dig it up so I
    can prove that buried treasure exists!
[11:47] dogo
    Are you serious?
[11:49] dogo
    This is going in a very bad direction...
[11:51] dogo
    If anyone finds it...
[11:54] shu
    What's wrong, Chiro?
[11:55] dogo
    Oh, nothing...
[11:56] dogo
    I'll dig, too!
[12:06] shiro
    I'm shocked to see them
    performing physical labor.
[12:10] ata
    They have nothing better to do.
[12:12] una
    But it means my company doesn't have
    to hire more people, so that's good.
[12:16] fura
    And I'm certain he will appear.
[12:19] una
    Yes.
[12:26] kiri
    It says "Unazuki Construction."
[12:28] pro
    That's our sponsor this go-round.
[12:31] ban
    Hey, Ichiro.
[12:32] ban
    What are you so worked up about?
[12:34] dogo
    What does it matter to you?!
[12:36] waku
    You didn't put something in the time
    capsule you don't want anyone to see, did you?
[12:41] dogo
    C-Certainly not!
[12:44] shu
    I found a time capsule from
    Tai-Tai and Chiro's class year.
[12:46] kiri
    Really? Sounds fun! Open it!
[12:49] dogo
    Hey, you can't do that!
[12:51] dogo
    We're supposed to open it with the
    graduation committee when we turn twenty!
[12:55] shu
    No big deal. We'll just bury it again after.
[12:57] kiri
    Yeah, yeah!
[12:58] ban
    I don't really care, myself.
[13:00] dogo
    Hey, Taishi!
[13:02] waku
    If he wants it to stay closed so bad,
     we absolutely have to open it.
[13:06] kiri
    There it is! Wakura-senpai's super-sadism!
[13:09] shu
    Then...
[13:11] shu
    "My dream for the future. Dogo Ichiro."
[13:17] kiri
    Let's see...
[13:18] kiri
    "In elementary school, I always
    played the 'cheerful idiot'..."
[13:23] ban
    "I was planning to act more self-conscious
    in middle school, but..."
[13:28] ban
    "Just recently, I met this amazing
    person two grades above me..."
[13:33] ban
    "He told me, 'Never stop being as
    straightforward and cheerful as you are.'"
[13:38] ban
    "I'll never forget the fervor
    in his gaze in that moment."
[13:43] ban
    "That person's name was...
[13:45] ban
    Nanao-senpai."
[13:47] ban
    "Senpai, please keep your eyes on me forever."
[13:52] ban
    For real, Ichiro?
[13:54] ban
    Wakura-senpai, you did a cruel thing.
[13:56] waku
    I forgot. Sorry.
[13:59] dogo
    No... I'm glad you forgot.
[14:03] ban
    Yeah, I wouldn't want anyone
    to see this, either.
[14:04] ban
    That's why I wanted to dig
    it up and erase it forever!
[14:08] ban
    But now we've seen it.
[14:11] shu
    Hey.
[14:12] shu
    I found one from Wakura-senpai's
    grade, too.
[14:15] kiri
    Hey, let's have a look!
[14:18] kiri
    Wakura-senpai, did you
    write letters to everyone?
[14:21] kiri
    Very conscientious...
[14:23] kiri
    "Aizawa-kun, I hope your
    bed-wetting habit clears up."
[14:27] kiri
    "As promised, I never told anyone about it."
[14:31] kiri
    You wrote it down for posterity?!
[14:34] waku
    I remember now!
[14:35] waku
    I wrote down everyone's darkest secrets.
[14:38] waku
    I figured by the time we're twenty,
     the statute of limitations would be up.
[14:41] kiri
    He's been a super-sadist since he was a kid.
[14:44] ban
    What other kinds of things did he write?
[14:46] kiri
    Let's see...
[14:48] kiri
    "Ito-kun, remember how you wore
    that yellow-stained gym uniform?"
[14:52] kiri
    "At least the smell of your
    sweat was very invigorating..."
[14:56] kiri
    Hey, that won't make him feel any better!
[14:58] dogo
    But it really is cool the way
    you say that stuff straight!
[15:03] ban
    Hey. What are you trying to
    slip into the conversation?
[15:06] dogo
    No, it's not like that!
[15:08] dogo
    It's not like that at all!
[15:11] dogo
    It's not like that at all, not at all!
[15:13] dogo
    Wait, what am I saying?
[15:17] kyo
    This is getting kind of fun.
[15:22] kin
    I've found something!
[15:25] kin
    Look! It's a boot caked with blood and sweat!
[15:28] kin
    This is proof that someone dug up gold here!
[15:31] kin
    In other words, there's gold buried here!
[15:35] kin
    Okay, buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
[15:38] kin
    Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
[15:40] kin
    Buried trea—
[15:40] mon
    That's enough!
[15:46] rep
    What's this? We didn't find buried treasure!
     We found a monster instead!
[15:50] mon
    There is no buried treasure here!
[15:52] pro
    Did you plan this twist?
[15:54] dad
    N-No...
[15:55] pro
    Ah well, it seems amusing.
[15:58] mon
    Don't enjoy things in such a lukewarm way!
[16:01] mon
    It's the existence of people like you
[16:03] mon
    that keeps brainless and irrelevant
    shows like this in existence!
[16:06] mon
    You make too much brainless TV,
    watched by too many brainless people!
[16:10] kiri
    Isn't TV something you're supposed
    to turn your brain off for?
[16:13] mon
    That's enough!
[16:15] mon
    No one understands my feelings!
[16:18] mon
    The feelings of a person
    named "Buried Treasure, Go!"
[16:22] shu
    Is that you, Yonekura-kun?
[16:24] dad
    Kingo! Are you Kingo?
[16:27] mon
    That's right! And I'm not
    going to take it anymore!
[16:32] karl
    He's currently suffering in
    the depths of resentment!
[16:36] karl
    We need to make him happy!
[16:39] karl
    Again?
[16:40] karl
    As Prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
[16:43] karl
    Become Karl's Knights Happy
    Kiss and save the people!
[16:54] karl
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[17:05] karl
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[17:16] karl
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[17:25] karl
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[17:33] karl
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[17:42] karl
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[17:47] karl
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[17:49] karl
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[17:52] karl
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[17:54] karl
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[17:57] karl
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[17:59] karl
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[18:03] karl
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[18:10] shu
    Kingo-kun, I don't think you
    really hate your father.
[18:17] shu
    It's seeing him give everything he has
    on a dream that might never come true
[18:21] shu
    that bothers you, right?
[18:23] shu
    It's hard to watch
    him working too hard, isn't it?
[18:27] mon
    Now that you mention it...
[18:29] mon
    Once, he used the money he
    made on a treasure-digging job
[18:33] mon
    to buy me a toy.
[18:37] mon
    There was dirt on the bill...
[18:40] kiri
    I feel like I've seen this
    story somewhere before...
[18:43] mon
    My father always worked, covered in mud,
     without ever complaining...
[18:48] mon
    He's working so hard,
    but it never leads to anything.
[18:51] mon
    I just watch him get more and more
    covered in mud! That's what's so hard!
[18:55] kin
    Kingo...
[18:58] karl
    Then we'd better make him happy!
[19:01] karl
    You, too!
[19:03] fura
    I won't let it happen!
[19:05] fura
    Rage, monster!
[19:13] mon
    Buried treasure! Hit the motherload!
[19:18] mon
    Hit the motherload!
[19:20] mon
    Hit the motherload!
[19:27] kiri
    I think he's being manipulated!
[19:29] shu
    What should we do?
[19:31] karl
    Make him happy!
[19:33] karl
    Go on, my knights of happiness!
[19:37] karl
    This time, lift his unhappiness
    and make him happy!
[19:43] kiri
    Hey, Kyotaro, hurry up.
[19:45] shu
    If it will end this sooner...
[19:47] karl
    Use your powers combined to make him happy!
[19:51] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:52] karl
    Yes!
[19:52] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:54] karl
    Yes!
[19:54] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:55] karl
    Yes!
[19:56] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:57] karl
    Yes!
[19:57] karl
    Are you happy?
[19:58] karl
    Yes!
[19:59] karl
    Let's happy hour!
[20:02] karl
    Happy and Set!
[20:16] karl
    Return to happiness!
[20:18] karl
    Happy and Turn!
[20:30] mon
    Feels like heaven!
[20:37] mon
    Happy End!
[20:38] mon
    Happy Powder!
[20:43] dad
    Kingo!
[20:49] shu
    He didn't find buried treasure,
    but he did find a hot spring.
[20:53] pro
    Well done, Yonekura-kun!
[20:55] pro
    This will be a huge success for our show!
[20:57] dad
    I'm so lucky!
[21:08] kiri
    I hear the town's going to work together
[21:10] kiri
    to build a big bath facility
    around that hot spring.
[21:14] wak
    And the Yonekura family is
    getting the credit for it.
[21:21] dad
    Kingo. Today, you woke me up.
[21:25] dad
    Thanks to you,
[21:26] dad
    I'm going to live with my feet
    planted firmly on the ground.
[21:30] dad
    Here, on the same ground where you stand.
[21:32] kin
    What about the buried treasure?
[21:34] dad
    Forget it.
[21:35] dad
    You've given me a new dream.
[21:37] dad
    Thank you, Kingo.
[21:43] waku
    That reminds me, Kyotaro-kun...
[21:45] waku
    What was it that you hid in your pocket?
[21:47] shu
    Oh. You saw that?
[21:54] dogo
    You guys were really close, huh?
[21:56] dogo
    I feel like we were.
[21:58] ---
    That's right.
[21:59] ban
    But why is your relationship so strained now?
[22:03] ban
    Is it?
[22:05] kiri
    Why not send a copy to Ata,
    to remind him of the old days?
[22:08] shu
    Good idea.
SIGN    This was in the time capsule
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    HAPPY and Beautiful
SIGN    Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY and Beautiful"!
SIGN    Shirahone Masa holds his Maasa Sweets Festival.
SIGN    What's he really after? And what's his connection to Ichiro?

Season 4

5 - HAPPY and Beautiful

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] shi
    --
[00:00] sign
    --
[00:00] masa
    --
SIGN    HAPPY and Beautiful
SIGN    
    Binan High School
[01:42] kiri
    Isn't that funny?
[01:47] kiri
    What's with the line?
[01:49] shu
    Dunno.
[01:52] shu
    Sleepy...
[01:53] dogo
    Senpai, senpai, senpai, senpai!
[01:55] dogo
    Good morning!
[01:58] kiri
    The morning screamer has arrived.
[02:01] ban
    Senpai. Good morning.
[02:05] dogo
    What's all this?
[02:07] wa
    Hey.
[02:09] wa
    Ryoma-kun, these are for you.
[02:11] kiri
    Cookies!
[02:14] kiri
    Thank y—
[02:16] kiri
    Y—
[02:17] kiri
    Y—
[02:18] dogo
    Nanao-senpai. You're teasing Ryoma-senpai again.
[02:23] wak
    You really want them?
[02:25] kiri
    I do!
[02:26] wak
    Here you go, then.
[02:28] kiri
    Hooray!
[02:29] dogo
    But why do you have cookies?
[02:31] wak
    They're handing them out up there,
    so I picked up a pack.
SIGN    Maasa Sweets Festival
[02:44] ma
    Here, a present for you!
[02:46] ma
    Thank you so much!
[02:51] ma
    For you, too.
[02:52] ma
    Handmade cookies using
    Maasa's special recipe!
[02:56] ma
    Th-Thank you so much!
[03:01] kiri
    Maasa Sweets Festival?
[03:04] kiri
    You mean... these are...
[03:05] man
    They're most likely...
[03:06] man
    No, they're definitely cookies handmade
    by Shirahone Maasa of the student council.
[03:13] man
    But why a sweets festival?
[03:16] shu
    Dunno. No interest in it.
[03:20] shu
    Hey, Kyotaro...
[03:23] mas
    "Maasa Sweets Festival"
    is just a lot of kidding.
[03:26] mas
    It's really...
[03:28] mas
    Hey!
SIGN    Maasa Sweets Festival For lunch, too!
[03:37] mas
    Don't worry, there's enough
     here for everyone!
[03:40] mas
    Go ahead and eat your fill!
[03:43] mas
    You can have some, too.
SIGN    Sujikawa Honeo
[03:47] suji
    Thank you very much.
[03:49] mas
    I made a special cupcake just for you, too.
[03:52] mas
    It's one of my special sweets,
    packed with Echire butter imported from France.
[03:58] mas
    Now, I'll top it with fresh cream...
[04:02] stu
    Who is that guy?
[04:03] stu
    That's Sujikawa.
[04:04] stu
    The guy we call "chicken carcass."
[04:06] stu
    Oh, chicken carcass.
[04:09] masa
    Be quiet.
[04:11] masa
    It's not nice to say that stuff.
[04:14] suji
    He defended me!
[04:16] suji
    Well, see you later, Sujikawa-kun.
[04:18] suji
    R-Right...
[04:20] suji
    Okay, now! Don't worry,
     there's plenty for all you guys, too!
[04:27] una
    Maasa... what's he thinking?
[04:30] suji
    It's probably all full of sugar and fat...
[04:31] ata
    Well, that explains it.
[04:34] suji
    Surely, if I eat this...
[04:38] stu
    Me too, me too, me too!
[04:45] una
    Are you okay?
[04:47] suji
    Y-Yes...
[04:49] suji
    I'm sorry.
[04:53] una
    They call him chicken carcass, but...
[04:56] una
    He looks like all the stock's
    been boiled out of him already.
[05:01] fura
    Sniff, sniff, sniff...
[05:03] fura
    I smell the stench of unhappiness again.
[05:06] fura
    From that direction...
[05:07] fura
    No... from this direction, too?
SIGN    Maasa Sweets Festival
[05:15] shu
    You know about genetic testing?
[05:17] dogo
    What about genetic testing?
[05:18] kiri
    Kyotaro, where did that come from?
[05:21] shu
    You think it's really accurate?
[05:23] man
    Yeah. Genetic research has been
    making great strides of late.
[05:29] kiri
    What kinds of things can it tell us?
[05:31] man
    Diseases you're prone to, facial structure,
[05:34] man
    whether you're predisposed
    to putting on weight or not...
[05:37] man
    They can read all that
    from your genetic makeup.
[05:41] dogo
    Wow, wow, wow! I wanna try it!
[05:44] man
    You'd better not.
[05:45] dogo
    Why not?
[05:47] waku
    If a child or young person
[05:49] waku
    with a future still ahead of them is told
    "you're genetically predisposed to stupidity,"
[05:53] waku
    it might be demotivating.
[05:56] waku
    Right, Ichiro-kun?
[05:57] dogo
    That's true.
[06:05] suji
    It all came back up again.
[06:08] suji
    I guess my stomach is
    sensitive to fresh cream.
[06:11] man
    Hey, want to go to Maasa-san's
    sweets buffet later on?
[06:15] man
    Sure, sure!
[06:16] man
    I can afford to pack on a few more pounds!
[06:18] suji
    They're lucky to be so plump...
[06:23] suji
    I've never been able to put on weight,
    even when I was little.
[06:27] suji
    Hoping to gain a few pounds,
    I even tried protein shakes...
[06:34] suji
    but they disagreed with me and made me sick.
[06:36] ---
    My stomach...
[06:39] suji
    I tried stuffing myself
    with various other foods,
[06:43] suji
    but it ended the same way.
[06:45] suji
    I just got sick and ended
    up thinner than before.
[06:49] suji
    Around that time, people
    started calling me...
[06:54] suji
    "Nothing but skin and bones left...
    chicken carcass."
SIGN    We use real chicken carcass!
[06:59] sign
    It must be my genes that keep
    me from putting on weight.
[07:03] sign
    There's no other way around it.
[07:06] kiri
    So if you're genetically predisposed to being fat,
     dieting can't help you?
[07:10] man
    Not necessarily... It's just what
    your body will tend towards.
[07:16] dogo
    Why? Why? Why?
[07:17] man
    Near the end of the Ice Age,
[07:19] man
    it's said that most of the Northern
    Hemisphere was covered in ice.
[07:23] dogo
    And? And?
[07:25] man
    There's a theory that this harsh environment
    led to the evolution of a conservation gene
[07:29] man
    that let humans store more energy
    from the food they consumed.
[07:31] man
    Those who inherited that gene are
    more inclined towards obesity today.
[07:38] kiri
    So it's my genes' fault that I like sweets?
[07:42] wak
    You'd better be careful, Ryoma-kun.
[07:44] kiri
    Yeah, I'd seriously better!
[07:46] dogo
    For real, for real, for real!
[07:47] dogo
    Me, too!
[07:48] wak
    I wonder where the genes that make you
    such a loudmouth come from, Ichiro.
[07:54] dogo
    Nanao-senpai! Are you interested in my genes?
[07:58] waku
    Not a bit.
[07:59] karl
    No worries here.
[08:01] karl
    There was no Ice Age in Honyala Land.
[08:04] shu
    I'm starting to think it's better
    not to know about your genes.
[08:14] mas
    Gosh, today made me so tired.
SIGN    Maasa's Fatten Up
     Pigs Recipe
[08:19] mas
    The Maasa Sweets Festival was a big lie.
[08:22] sign
    It's actually the Maasa "Fatten Up,
     You Pigs" Festival.
[08:28] masa
    They didn't contain Echire butter,
     but weight-gain butter!
[08:31] masa
    Now, you pigs...
[08:33] masa
    Get fat, all of you!
[08:38] masa
    How long have you been there?
[08:40] fura
    A while? Well... it's hard to say.
[08:46] una
    Sounds like your sweets festival
    was a roaring success.
[08:50] masa
    I-It was, thank you...
[08:53] masa
    I still have a few left,
    so I'll go hand those out...
[09:18] dogo
    Hey, hey, hey!
[09:19] dogo
    Wait up!
[09:22] dogo
    You worked really hard on your diet, huh?
[09:26] dogo
    I honestly didn't recognize you.
[09:28] dogo
    Since you changed your name to "Maasa," too...
[09:32] dogo
    I heard you'd gone on a
    foreign exchange trip, but...
[09:43] dogo
    I never thought we'd end
    up at the same high school.
[09:48] masa
    Shut up!
[09:50] masa
    I don't know you.
[09:57] kiri
    So those two know each other, huh?
[10:01] man
    I hear they're cousins.
[10:03] man
    They went to the same school until
    summer break of their sixth year,
[10:05] man
    when he went to study abroad.
[10:09] kiri
    But if Ichiro's his cousin
    and he's avoiding him...
[10:12] kiri
    I wonder what happened?
[10:13] waku
    Maybe he has a secret
     he doesn't want anyone to know.
[10:17] waku
    Secret?
[10:20] shu
    No interest here.
[10:21] shu
    Actually, I'm hungry.
[10:23] kiri
    Want to get something to eat, then?
[10:25] dogo
    Hey, senpais! Are we getting food?
[10:28] dogo
    Let's go, let's go!
[10:34] masa
    Stupid Ichiro...
[10:41] (Flashback) masa
    Shirahone, you're really something.
[10:44] (Flashback) masa
    Yeah, no kidding!
[10:45] (Flashback) masa
    I couldn't do what you do.
SIGN    School Play Bunbuku Chagama
[10:48] (Flashback) kid
    Shirahone'd be perfect, because he's fat!
[10:51] (Flashback) kid
    And he's got that old-fashioned
    name, Magozaemon!
[10:53] (Flashback) kid
    He's perfect for Bunbuku Chagama!
SIGN    Playing Bunbuku Chagama: Shirahone Magozaemon
[10:57] (Flashback) ichi
    Wow, wow, wow!
[10:59] (Flashback) ichi
    You got the lead role!
[11:04] masa
    No, no!
[11:05] masa
    I'm not that person!
[11:07] masa
    After making my cutie-pie debut...
[11:10] masa
    It makes me so annoyed!
[11:15] masa
    I ate one!
[11:16] masa
    After I held off on carbs
    for four whole years!
[11:20] masa
    You stupid things!
[11:29] suji
    I forced myself to eat,
    but it all came right back up again...
[11:35] suji
    You're...
[11:39] masa
    So you were throwing up the cookies
    I worked so hard on, were you?
[11:44] suji
    S-Sorry...
[11:45] suji
    I've always had a weak stomach,
    and I can't put on weight because of it...
[11:49] masa
    If you can't put on weight...
    then you might as well become a monster!
[11:54] shi
    Maasa's right.
[11:55] una
    Yeah.
[11:57] masa
    Ibusuki-senpai...
[11:58] masa
    Unazuki-senpai...
[12:01] shi
    I understand your suffering.
[12:03] shi
    The people of this world
[12:05] shi
    envy those who represent the opposite
    of what they fear for themselves,
[12:08] shi
    so they criticize and attack them.
[12:11] shi
    Wouldn't you like to correct those people?
[12:18] shi
    We are the Furanui Knights...
[12:20] shi
    Edelstein!
[12:23] shi
    Druck!
[12:24] shi
    Mich!
[12:25] shi
    Hart!
[12:27] shi
    An!
SIGN    Dogo Ichiro Born August 8th Blood Type: O Leo Hobbies: Card games Likes: Ichiro tarts, fun
[12:56] shu
    Delicious.
[12:57] dogo
    Yeah, yeah, yeah!
[12:59] dogo
    After a hot bath you just
    gotta have ramen, huh?
[13:02] kiri
    It's "after a night of drinking, you
    have to finish with ramen," right?
[13:05] kiri
    Of course, I don't drink,
    so I wouldn't know...
[13:09] kiri
    I wonder why old men want
    to eat ramen after drinking.
[13:14] kiri
    When one imbibes alcohol, sugars are needed
    to break down the alcohol in the bloodstream.
[13:20] kiri
    Thus, blood sugar levels drop, which leads
    to additional cravings for carbohydrates.
[13:26] waku
    Well, ramen soup is full of salt and fat,
    and the noodles are basically a carb bomb...
[13:32] dogo
    I see!
[13:34] dogo
    So we're getting nutrition from
    those chicken carcasses, huh?
[13:42] shu
    Did you hear something?
[13:45] kiri
    I think so...
[13:48] mon
    You people...
[13:49] mon
    No matter how much I eat,
    the nutrition is snatched away...
[13:53] mon
    Can you understand how I feel, squawk?!
[13:56] mon
    Squawk, squawk, squawkity-squawk!
[13:58] ichi
    He's saying something.
[14:00] kiri
    Another pain in the butt...
[14:04] shu
    Eating makes me sleepy.
[14:06] man
    That's because consuming carbs
    increases your blood sugar.
[14:10] man
    Then, to lower your blood sugar,
    insulin is secreted,
[14:14] man
    which causes a decrease in the
    glucose needed for brain functions,
[14:18] man
    which makes you sleepy.
[14:24] gara
    Hey, you guys! Get out here, squawk!
[14:28] dogo
    I think that chicken
    carcass is calling us out.
[14:31] dogo
    What should we do?
[14:32] dogo
    Just ignore him.
[14:34] dogo
    Thought so.
[14:34] mon
    You people...
[14:36] mon
    If you won't acknowledge my suffering...
[14:40] mon
    I'll have to do this, squawk!
[14:46] kiri
    What is he doing?
[14:47] man
    Trying to stir up the wind
    with his wings, I think...
[14:51] man
    Too bad he's a chicken carcass.
[14:52] dogo
    I feel a little bad for him.
[14:55] dogo
    What should we do?
[14:56] dogo
    Can't we just leave him be?
[14:59] karl
    He's in the depths of anger and suffering!
[15:03] karl
    We need to make him happy!
[15:07] dogo
    Great, now Karls is here...
[15:10] dogo
    I bet he's gonna make us do it again.
[15:12] karl
    That's right!
[15:25] karl
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[16:01] karl
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[16:15] karl
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[16:28] karl
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[16:41] karl
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[16:54] karl
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[16:59] karl
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[17:02] karl
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[17:04] karl
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[17:07] karl
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[17:09] karl
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[17:12] karl
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[17:16] karl
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[17:21] mon
    Hey!
[17:22] mon
    Everything I eat just
    gets boiled off as broth!
[17:26] mon
    Because of that, I can't put on any weight!
[17:30] mon
    I'm going to share that pain with you!
[17:34] mon
    Chicken Carcass Broth Beam!
[17:46] dogo
    Wow, this broth is delicious.
[17:49] dogo
    Let me try.
[17:51] dogo
    Yeah, what delicious broth!
[17:53] mon
    Stop mocking me!
[17:56] mon
    It's time to get serious!
[17:58] mon
    Chicken Carcass Paitan Splash!
[18:02] shu
    Soup made from chicken carcass
    is very nutritious, isn't it?
[18:06] mon
    Yes, squawk!
[18:08] mon
    That's why people guzzle
    down my broth, squawk!
[18:11] mon
    It's also very delicious, squawk!
[18:13] shu
    Why not be proud, then?
[18:15] shu
    That's a sign that you're healthy.
[18:18] mon
    W-Well...
[18:20] shu
    In this world, there are people who
    stress because they can't gain weight,
[18:23] shu
    and people who stress
    because they can't lose it.
[18:27] shu
    Well, everyone stresses over a lot of things.
[18:31] mon
    Th-They do?
[18:32] shu
    Well, as long as you're healthy and can
    enjoy a nice nap, you're all right in my book.
[18:40] karl
    Now, everyone!
[18:41] kiri
    Come on, Kyotaro. Hurry up.
[18:46] kyo
    Let's get this over with.
[18:49] kyo
    Use your powers combined to make him happy!
[18:52] kyo
    Are you happy?
[18:53] kyo
    Yes!
[18:54] kyo
    Are you happy?
[18:55] kyo
    Yes!
[18:56] kyo
    Are you happy?
[18:57] kyo
    Yes!
[18:57] kyo
    Are you happy?
[18:58] kyo
    Yes!
[18:59] kyo
    Are you happy?
[19:00] kyo
    Yes!
[19:01] kyo
    Let's happy hour!
[19:04] kyo
    Happy and Set!
[19:18] kyo
    Return to happiness!
[19:20] kyo
    Happy and Turn!
[19:30] mon
    Squawk in the park...
[19:38] mon
    Happy End!
[19:40] mon
    Happy Powder!
[19:46] suji
    What? What was I doing just now?
[19:50] man
    That's the first year,
    Sujikawa Honeo, isn't it?
[19:52] dogo
    Yeah, he's so skinny people
    call him chicken carcass...
[19:57] suji
    Y-Yes.
[19:58] suji
    But I always ace my physicals.
[20:01] suji
    I'm the peak of health.
[20:04] suji
    And even though I'm thin, I'm quite strong.
[20:12] suji
    S-See?
[20:14] dogo
    Hey, don't push yourself, too!
[20:17] suji
    Excuse me.
[20:21] karl
    Looks like everyone's happy again today!
[20:24] karl
    Happy, happy!
[20:28] una
    Now, now.
[20:29] una
    There'll be other chances.
[20:35] una
    That's right, Maasa. We haven't
    tried your Maasa cookies yet.
[20:42] una
    You won't give us any?
[20:43] masa
    Well... I'm sorry about that.
[20:49] masa
    The truth is... I was hiding something.
[20:54] ata
    We'll catch it next time, then.
[20:56] ata
    The Maasa "Fatten Up, You Pigs" Festival.
[21:00] una
    Next time, I hope you'll put
    in even more weight-gain butter
[21:03] una
    to make everyone even fatter.
[21:08] una
    And you'll still be you, Maasa.
[21:12] una
    That's right. Let's go, Maasa.
[21:21] shu
    I'm exhausted.
[21:23] shu
    Just beat.
[21:23] kiri
    Isn't this the second time
    we've been here today?
[21:26] man
    We really worked up a sweat
    against that monster.
[21:29] dogo
    It's best to have a bath after a fight!
[21:32] waku
    But what was his secret in the end?
[21:38] dogo
    Whose secret?
[21:39] waku
    Shirahone Maasa.
[21:40] waku
    He's your cousin, isn't he?
[21:42] dogo
    Yeah, he is!
[21:44] dogo
    But I couldn't think of what
    secret he could possibly have,
[21:48] dogo
    so I brought this...
[21:49] waku
    Your elementary school album?
[21:53] dogo
    Here!
[21:56] kiri
    He looks totally different!
[21:57] kiri
    Almost unrecognizable...
[22:01] man
    And his name...
[22:03] man
    Magozaemon?
[22:11] masa
    Bye-bye, Magozaemon!
[22:18] masa
    I'm Shirahone Maasa!
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    HAPPY Identity
SIGN    Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Identity"!
SIGN    All of a sudden, it's the rainy season! Good thing we don't have anything that can get moldy this year, huh?
SIGN    Some actually theorize that the word for "rainy season" originally meant "moldy season." (-Manza)
SIGN    

Season 4

6 - HAPPY Identity

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:12] shu
    Ah, the rainy season...
[00:15] shu
    So exhausting.
[00:19] karl
    What's all this?
[00:20] karl
    Does "rainy season" mean it
    really rains all the time?
[00:22] karl
    This is the coolest!
[00:24] karl
    Exhausting and heavy.
[00:25] karl
    If something has to weigh me down,
    I wish it could be just the rain or Karls...
[00:30] karl
    What's the matter?
[00:31] karl
    Humans don't like the rainy season?
[00:33] karl
    Oh, is it because you can't dry
    off quickly when you're wet?
[00:36] karl
    I can handle that, though!
[00:43] shu
    Actually, maybe I can't handle either option...
[00:48] kar
    Hey, hey!
[00:49] kar
    Is it really just gonna
    keep raining like this?
[00:52] kar
    Is there a sign or something when it stops?
[00:55] kar
    I wanna see it!
[00:57] shu
    If you spend enough time outdoors,
    you'll probably see it.
[01:00] kar
    Sounds great! I'll spend
    all my time outdoors!
[01:05] shu
    Looks like I'll just have to
    worry about the rain, then.
[01:15] ata
    What are you looking at?
[01:17] ata
    You forgot your umbrella, didn't you?
[01:20] ata
    You can't use mine.
[01:21] shu
    No, I was thinking... it's really flashy.
[01:25] ata
    What?!
[01:27] ata
    That vinyl umbrella would
    be better suited to you.
[01:30] ata
    That vinyl umbrella, used as a stopgap
    by those with poor planning skills!
[01:35] shu
    Well... I have an umbrella, actually.
[01:38] ata
    What?
[01:39] kiri
    Sorry, did I keep you waiting long?
[01:43] kiri
    Hey, Ata-kun!
[01:45] kiri
    What's the matter?
[01:47] ata
    You always do this!
[01:49] ata
    You make no preparations,
    force others to help you,
[01:52] ata
    then take it for granted that they will!
[01:54] kiri
    What's going on?
[01:56] ata
    And Kirishima! You're just as bad!
[01:58] ata
    You constantly indulge him!
[02:01] una
    What's all this?
[02:05] una
    Well, goodbye.
[02:10] shu
    So sleepy.
SIGN    HAPPY Identity
[03:57] kiri
    Hey, Kyotaro. Why don't you carry an umbrella?
[04:02] shu
    Can't be bothered.
[04:11] shu
    The rainy season has me
    even sleepier than usual.
[04:14] kiri
    You're sleepy all year round, Kyotaro.
[04:17] waku
    Now that you mention it, I can't imagine
    Kyotaro-kun carrying an umbrella.
[04:21] dogo
    That's true...
[04:23] dogo
    Nanao-senpai, I always imagine
    you with a bamboo umbrella.
[04:30] dogo
    It would look perfect with you!
[04:32] man
    And you...
[04:36] man
    You carry that perpetually
    busted-up vinyl one.
[04:39] dogo
    Shut up! You're no better!
[04:43] dogo
    You always carry that same purple vinyl one!
[04:47] man
    P-Purple merges the contrasting vitality
    of red with the tranquility of blue.
[04:53] man
    Psychologically speaking,
    it represents balance!
[05:00] man
    S-Speaking of umbrellas,
    130 million of them are sold per year.
[05:04] man
    80 million of those are vinyl umbrellas.
[05:07] man
    In addition, over half of those
    end up busted within the year...
[05:09] shu
    Oh, I hear people lose vinyl umbrellas a lot.
[05:13] kiri
    Kyotaro, you're the only person in Japan who
    could treat a universal experience like hearsay.
[05:16] man
    Hey, are you listening?
[05:17] dogo
    They're stolen a lot, too!
[05:19] waku
    Because vinyl umbrellas
    are so indistinguishable.
[05:22] waku
    It's hard to notice if
    someone swaps them on you.
[05:24] waku
    The best way to prevent theft might
    be to add a distinguishing mark of some kind.
[05:30] dogo
    Like writing your name really big...
SIGN    Dogo Ichiro
[05:33] man
    Assuming that wouldn't embarrass you, anyway.
[05:36] waku
    Actually, I think asserting
    yourself like that
[05:39] waku
    would be the best way to guard against theft.
[05:41] waku
    Who would steal something they'd
    be embarrassed to carry around?
[05:49] tori
    Those people... They seem like
    they're just shooting the breeze.
[05:54] tori
    Maybe I'll try talking to them...
[05:58] tori
    No, I can't.
[05:59] tori
    I'll just get swept along
    in the conversation.
[06:04] tori
    I...
[06:06] tori
    I can't make real friends.
[06:09] tori
    The kinds of friends I really want are...
[06:20] shu
    You've got a hell of a backbone.
[06:23] tori
    So do you.
SIGN    Friendship
[06:32] tori
    ...friends that you make like this!
[06:35] tori
    Friends you have heated debates with!
[06:38] tori
    That you sweat with!
[06:40] tori
    But I...
[06:42] tori
    Shucho Kaimu...
SIGN    Shucho Kaimu
[06:44] tori
    As my name suggests,
    I'm unable to assert myself...
[06:47] tori
    I'm just swept along with
    whatever everyone else is doing.
[06:51] tori
    I don't have any real friends.
[06:54] tori
    Bye-bye!
[06:55] tori
    Bye-bye!
[06:55] tori
    Bye-bye!
[06:56] tori
    Bye-bye!
[07:00] tori
    Just "bye-bye" friends, who wave to
    each other when it's time to go home.
[07:05] tori
    It's barely two seconds of communication!
[07:08] tori
    We've only just met
    and we're already saying goodbye!
[07:11] tori
    Those aren't friends!
[07:13] tori
    Have I... Have I...
[07:17] tori
    Have I not made real friends yet?
[07:20] tori
    Have I not experienced
    true high school life yet?
[07:24] kiri
    He's been there for a while, hasn't he?
[07:26] kiri
    Yes, he has.
[07:28] kiri
    Definitely.
[07:29] kiri
    A peeping Tom?
[07:34] tori
    Now's the moment! Now!
[07:36] tori
    I need to break out of
    my shell, assert myself,
[07:38] tori
    and make proper, deep friendships!
[07:43] tori
    Now that I think about it,
    a strong icebreaker is important, isn't it?
[07:47] tori
    Maybe I'll lead with a simple,
    "The bath feels great, huh?"
[07:51] tori
    Or something like that?
[07:53] tori
    No, something so trivial won't do!
[07:57] tori
    I need to grab their attention
    the moment I enter!
[08:00] tori
    But if I get too personal,
    they might think I'm weird...
[08:04] tori
    Maybe I'll just slip into their ongoing
    conversation, and earn goodwill that way?
[08:08] kiri
    Is he looking at us and muttering to himself?
[08:11] waku
    Ryoma-kun, go check him out.
[08:14] kiri
    Sure!
[08:14] kiri
    Wait, why me?
[08:16] dogo
    If he's peeping, we should confront him!
[08:18] man
    No, we can't do that, either.
[08:22] shu
    I'm overheating.
[08:25] kiri
    W-Wait, Kyotaro!
[08:36] tori
    What luck!
[08:38] tori
    Opportunity has fallen into my lap!
[08:39] tori
    Okay, now, just how you practiced it...
[08:42] tori
    Brown's the best color for umbrellas,
     don't you think?
[08:45] tori
    You know... umber-ellas.
[08:48] kiri
    Is he trying to justify peeping?
[08:49] kiri
    Can puns do that?
[08:51] kiri
    Building off our talk of umbrellas?
[08:53] kiri
    Expanding our umbrella circle has
    called a dangerous man into our midst.
[08:56] shu
    I don't know. Why?
[08:59] kiri
    Wow, he gave a prompt
    after getting the punchline...
[09:02] kiri
    He's forcing him to make a riddle out of it?
[09:04] kiri
    Kyotaro-kun's got a real sadistic streak.
[09:07] tori
    Um, w-well, it's a joke on the color umber,
[09:10] tori
    like brown, and the word umbrella...
[09:12] man
    The more he explains it,
    the more painful this gets.
[09:15] dogo
    Oh, hey! Was that the joke?
[09:17] man
    You actually needed the explanation?!
[09:20] tori
    Um... um...
[09:23] tori
    I... I like vinyl umbrellas, because they're
    transparent, which lets you see your surroundings better.
[09:28] tori
    They're cheap, and they're stolen often...
[09:30] shu
    I don't know. Wh—
[09:32] kiri
    No reason!
[09:33] kiri
    I think we've been in
    the bath too long today.
[09:37] tori
    Um, um... Vinyl umbrellas
    are very easy to use...
[09:41] tori
    Right? R-Right?
[09:43] man
    Let's hurry! There are some
    things you just shouldn't touch.
[09:47] dog
    Touch?! He's a groper, too?
[09:51] waku
    Ichiro-kun, I'll buy you a
    basic guide to idioms later.
[09:56] waku
    Let's go.
[09:57] dogo
    Really? Really?
[09:59] dogo
    I'd be honored to get a present
    from you, Nanao-senpai!
[10:02] tori
    Um, wait a mi—
[10:08] tori
    How could this have happened?
[10:09] tori
    I tried to initiate a real conversation,
    yet I completely failed to assert myself...
[10:14] tori
    I wanted to have a deeper
    conversation and be real friends!
[10:29] shiro
    Using a vinyl umbrella made
    for the British royal family
[10:33] shiro
    makes even walking to
    school in the rainy season
[10:34] shiro
    feel like a precious
    morning, don't you think?
[10:37] una
    If you used a normal vinyl umbrella,
    you'd look just like everyone else.
[10:41] ata
    Wielding a high-class umbrella
    suggests self-awareness and responsibility.
[10:47] ata
    The student council must not
    carry the umbrellas of commoners.
[10:52] una
    Ah.
[10:53] hone
    I... see.
[10:57] tori
    Vinyl umbrellas...
[10:58] tori
    I bet even an umbrella like this
    could be an opening for a conversation.
[11:07] tori
    I didn't assert myself enough last
    time about the vinyl umbrellas.
[11:11] tori
    If I assert my love for vinyl umbrellas more,
[11:14] tori
    I'm sure we'll become good friends!
[11:16] dogo
    Boy, I'm hungry!
[11:19] dogo
    Let's eat!
[11:21] tori
    Wow, don't vinyl umbrellas look delicious?
[11:25] dogo
    I'm done!
[11:29] man
    It's that guy from before!
[11:31] dogo
    That guy is bad news!
[11:35] man
    What on earth is his problem?
[11:37] dogo
    Did we do something to make him hate us?
[11:42] shu
    Just exhausted.
[11:43] shu
    The rainy season's possessed me.
[11:45] shu
    Ryo-chin, exorcise it.
[11:48] kiri
    Possessed you? It's not a demon...
[11:53] tori
    Would you like a vinyl umbrella?
[11:56] shu
    I don't know. Why?
[12:01] kiri
    Th-That's right!
[12:02] kiri
    We were gonna take the long way around,
     to get some exercise in!
[12:06] kiri
    Scary!
[12:07] kiri
    Maybe he's not a creeper,
    but a kind of demon?
[12:16] tori
    The view from under a vinyl umbrella...
[12:19] tori
    The rain makes everything blurry,
    which is a bit melancholy, don't you think?
[12:23] tori
    But I like that about it!
[12:25] tori
    Would you like one?
[12:34] kiri
    What do you think?
[12:35] dogo
    He's definitely bad news!
[12:38] man
    And if you look into his eyes...
[12:42] man
    They're the eyes of a man
    who's crossed a line.
[12:45] kiri
    No... It suggests...
[12:47] kiri
    he may not be human at all anymore.
[12:50] waku
    But he did seem quite obsessed
    with vinyl umbrellas.
[12:56] shu
    You think he works for a
    company that makes them?
[12:59] shu
    It is the rainy season...
[13:00] shu
    The rainy season, yeah.
[13:02] shu
    It's... the rainy season, yeah.
[13:04] shu
    Maybe it's viral marketing
    for vinyl umbrellas?
[13:07] shu
    Maybe!
[13:08] kiri
    Very... passionate... viral marketing.
[13:12] waku
    We're definitely backing
    away from the truth...
[13:16] waku
    But I like that about us.
[13:25] tori
    My chance! This time...
[13:27] kiri
    Sorry about that.
[13:28] tori
    Hey...
[13:31] kiri
    There he is!
[13:33] kiri
    Look, we already have a vinyl umbrella.
[13:36] kiri
    Come on, let's go, Kyotaro.
[13:43] karl
    Karu-ru-ru-ru!
[13:44] karl
    Rain, rain! Yeah, yeah!
[13:48] tori
    I'm just like these vinyl umbrellas.
[13:52] tori
    Neither of us have any self-assertion.
[13:57] tori
    That's why nobody cares about us.
[14:00] (Flashback) tori
    Bye-bye!
[14:01] (Flashback) tori
    Bye-bye!
[14:02] (Flashback) tori
    Bye-bye!
[14:02] (Flashback) tori
    Bye-bye!
[14:06] tori
    For two years... we've never said anything
    but "hello" and "goodbye" to each other!
[14:12] tori
    Everyone's just fine without me!
[14:15] tori
    Vinyl umbrellas are all the same,
    too, and that's why they get stolen!
[14:18] tori
    And when that happens,
    people just say "fine, whatever!"
[14:22] ata
    That's right.
[14:27] tori
    Aren't you...
[14:30] tori
    the student council?
SIGN    Ibusuki Ata Born June 12th Blood Type A Gemini Hobbies: Spending time at home Likes: Nagashi-somen, hard work
[14:46] karl
    Someone's unhappy.
[14:47] shu
    Here we go again.
[14:49] karl
    My knights of happiness!
[14:51] karl
    Come on!
[15:02] karl
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[15:39] karl
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[15:52] karl
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[16:05] karl
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[16:19] karl
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[16:32] karl
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[16:37] karl
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[16:39] karl
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[16:42] karl
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[16:44] karl
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[16:46] karl
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[16:49] karl
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[16:53] karl
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[16:57] karl
    Knights contract complete!
[17:00] shu
    Oh, we transformed again.
[17:04] karl
    Right now, he's in the depths of
    the suffering known as resentment!
[17:08] karl
    We need to make him happy!
[17:12] bini
    Viny viny viny!
[17:19] ---
    That's dangerous!
[17:20] kiri
    What's with all the droplets?
[17:24] kiri
    Wait, is that all he's got?
[17:26] kiri
    I think it's just normal water.
[17:28] dogo
    Oh, please.
[17:29] dogo
    This guy's nothing special.
[17:31] dogo
    Viny?
[17:32] bini
    How dare you mock me!
[17:35] bini
    Viny!
[17:39] dogo
    This attack's a lot more dangerous!
[17:43] bini
    Don't underestimate the potential of vinyl!
[17:46] bini
    You guys say vinyl umbrellas are mass-produced
    with no distinguishing features!
[17:50] bini
    You should take better care of them!
[17:56] waku
    Do you think this monster might be the boy
    who was obsessed with vinyl umbrellas?
[18:03] shira
    Maybe we should leave it to that
    monster and head back for now?
[18:07] una
    Sounds good to me.
[18:10] una
    Ata?
[18:11] una
    What's the matter?
[18:17] una
    Maybe we'll watch a little longer.
[18:20] vin
    Viny viny!
[18:21] vin
    You just realized it now?
[18:23] vin
    That's right! That's what I am!
[18:26] vin
    I'm like an indistinguishable vinyl umbrella,
    that you don't even notice when it's stolen!
[18:30] vin
    None of you would talk to me!
[18:33] kiri
    I think he's blaming this on us.
[18:36] dogo
    Taishi, you're the one who
    said he'd crossed the line!
[18:39] man
    I-Ichiro, you're the one who left your
    seat without taking a bite of your curry!
[18:43] waku
    Now, now.
[18:44] waku
    Why don't we settle this in the usual way,
    by making him happy?
[18:47] man
    Fair enough.
[18:48] dogo
    I guess...
[18:49] kiri
    Oh? Where's Kyotaro gone?
[18:55] kiri
    There he is!
[18:58] kiri
    Oh, there he is.
[19:00] kiri
    Hey!
[19:03] kiri
    I think he's sleeping.
[19:06] kiri
    Ryoma-kun, could you fetch him?
[19:08] kiri
    For heaven's sake. This is pitiful...
[19:12] dogo
    Um... I think he's waiting for us...
[19:16] dogo
    You think he's a good guy?
[19:17] dogo
    Maybe he's just the kind of
    person who's easily swept along?
[19:20] kiri
    Kyotaro.
[19:22] kiri
    Hey! Wake up!
[19:26] shu
    It's just so hard to care when it's raining.
[19:28] shu
    Ryo-chin. Could you please fill in for me?
[19:31] krii
    What do you think this is? Homework?
[19:34] vini
    Viny! Viny! Viny!
[19:36] vini
    How long are you gonna make me wait?!
[19:38] man
    He really was waiting?
[19:40] man
    I think he might really be a good guy!
[19:43] man
    Shut up! Shut up!
[19:44] man
    Stop mocking me all the time!
[19:46] waku
    That was a smooth piece
    of baiting, right there.
[19:49] vini
    Don't mock vinyl umbrellas!
[19:51] shu
    Vinyl umbrellas are very
    convenient and easy to use.
[19:56] shu
    They fulfill their job
    as umbrellas very well.
[19:59] vin
    Viny?
[20:00] shu
    You can mark them so that
    they won't be stolen
[20:03] shu
    and assert your personality that way, too.
[20:05] vin
    Viny!
[20:07] vin
    I tried to mark myself, too!
[20:10] vin
    But you still wouldn't talk to me!
[20:12] dogo
    Marked?
[20:13] man
    He probably means that string
    of misguided approaches.
[20:16] both
    We never noticed!
[20:18] viny
    I just want to assert myself with others
    without getting swept along.
[20:27] viny
    Why not join the debate club, then?
[20:30] viny
    Now! Use your powers
    combined to make him happy!
[20:34] viny
    Are you happy?
[20:35] viny
    Yes!
[20:35] viny
    Are you happy?
[20:36] viny
    Yes!
[20:37] viny
    Are you happy?
[20:38] viny
    Yes!
[20:38] viny
    Are you happy?
[20:39] viny
    Yes!
[20:40] viny
    Are you happy?
[20:41] viny
    Yes!
[20:42] viny
    Let's happy hour!
[20:45] viny
    Happy and Set!
[20:58] viny
    Return to happiness!
[21:00] viny
    Happy and Turn!
[21:12] viny
    Right as rain.
[21:13] viny
    Because I'm an umbrella, you know?
[21:19] viny
    Happy End!
[21:21] viny
    Happy Powder!
[21:29] tori
    You've opened my eyes!
[21:31] tori
    I'll assert myself in the debate club!
[21:38] ata
    I guess he was just a
    vinyl umbrella all along.
[21:40] ata
    He wasn't worthy to take the spotlight.
[21:45] una
    Ata?
[21:46] una
    Darn it...
[21:52] dogo
    My umbrella!
[21:55] waku
    I guess there's no need to worry
    about it being stolen now.
[21:58] waku
    It suits you surprisingly well.
[22:00] waku
    Very self-assertive.
[22:02] waku
    Chiro, you might not need that.
[22:08] waku
    The rain let up.
[22:09] waku
    A rainbow, huh?
[22:10] waku
    A rainbow, yeah.
[22:11] waku
    Total rainbow.
[22:12] waku
    A rainbow? Where, where?
[22:14] waku
    Wow!
[22:16] karl
    Yahoo!
[22:18] karl
    It's the sign for when the rain stops!
[22:19] karl
    Karurururu!
SIGN    HAPPY Flutter Kicks
SIGN    Next Episode
[23:54] sign
    Next time: ''Let's happy kiss our
    way to HAPPY Flutter Kicks."
SIGN    Suddenly, it's summer! Another all-male swimming competition?
SIGN    It's a school event, so there will be the traditional principal's long-winded speech.
SIGN    Actually, this comment is so long-winded we had to shrink the font, so it's really hard to read, sorry about that.
SIGN    

Season 4

7 - Let's happy kiss our way to HAPPY Flutter Kicks

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    HAPPY Flutter Kicks
SIGN    Binan High School All Men Swimming Competition
[01:40] man
    The Binan High School All
    Men Swimming Competition.
[01:44] man
    It's a traditional event with over 100 years
     of history, held in our school pool.
[01:50] shu
    Such a pain in the neck...
[01:55] dogo
    I bought a new swimsuit, too!
[01:57] waku
    Oh?
[01:57] waku
    Don't first years need to wear
    their school swimsuit?
[02:00] dogo
    Do we?!
[02:03] man
    You should have gotten a handout about it.
[02:05] dogo
    Aw, but why only the first years?
[02:08] man
    That's a 100-year tradition, too.
[02:11] dogo
    It's not fair! You guys have all the fun!
[02:14] kiri
    Kyotaro, have you bought a swimsuit yet?
[02:16] shu
    Not yet. I think I'll just use my
    swimsuit from last year, actually.
[02:20] kiri
    What? You're gonna wear that
    navy blue school swimsuit again?
SIGN    Shuzenji Kyotaro
[02:24] kiri
    It's even got a name tag that says
    "Class 1-B, Shuzenji Kyotaro" on it.
[02:30] shu
    I just don't care about swimsuits, though...
[02:31] dogo
    But, Senpai, if you have
    the freedom to choose...
[02:35] man
    Actually, having the freedom to choose your
    swimsuit comes with a lot of pressure, too.
[02:40] man
    It puts a person's taste on trial.
[02:43] waku
    Of course, the more unremarkable
    a person is on the inside,
[02:46] waku
    the more desperate they are
    to have a remarkable look.
[02:49] dogo
    Yeah! I really want that remarkable look!
[02:52] man
    That's what he was mocking...
[02:54] waku
    I think the swimsuit competition will
    coincide with the Pretty Boy Contest, too.
SIGN    Simultaneous event!
    The Pretty Boy Contest will be held, too!
[03:00] dogo
    You're right!
[03:02] man
    I heard the rule this time is that whoever
    stands out most at the swimming contest wins.
[03:08] dogo
    All the more reason I want a new swimsuit!
[03:11] karl
    Maybe I'll wear one instead!
[03:13] dogo
    Otters don't need clothes!
[03:16] shu
    I'm totally incapable of caring.
[03:18] shu
    I'm going to go home and sleep.
[03:20] kiri
    Hey, wait, Kyotaro!
[03:22] kiri
    What should I wear for my swimsuit?
[03:24] kiri
    Hey! Hey!
SIGN    125th Binan High School All Men Swimming Competition Binan High School Outdoor Pool Starts 10:00
[03:27] una
    It's finally come.
[03:29] una
    Yes.
[03:30] shira
    I ordered a special swimsuit for myself.
[03:33] shira
    It wouldn't be very "Maasa" to wear the same
    navy blue thing as the other first years!
[03:38] fura
    I see. This will be a fine chance.
[03:41] ata
    In what way?
[03:43] fura
    It's time for us to show our prowess.
[03:46] fura
    We'll use the swimming competition to prove
    that we are the leading men of this world.
[03:51] shira
    No need for that!
[03:53] shira
    Maasa is always the world's
    leading cutiepie!
SIGN    Simultaneous event!
    The Pretty Boy Contest will be held, too!
[03:57] fura
    Pretty Boy Contest?
[03:59] fura
    This is it!
[04:01] fura
    We'll win, and prove that
    the Furanui Knights are...
[04:05] fura
    ...superior!
[04:10] fura
    Damn them...
[04:12] una
    For heaven's sake.
[04:14] una
    Winning the Pretty Boy
    Contest is so beneath us.
[04:19] shira
    For reals.
[04:20] ata
    Yes. Our goal at the swimming contest is—
[04:24] kiri
    Hey, Ata-kun.
[04:29] kiri
    Um... I...
[04:32] kiri
    As the student council, you should go first.
[04:35] shira
    Thank you!
[04:36] una
    C'mon, Ata. They're yielding the way.
[04:38] shira
    Let's go, Senpai.
[04:40] ata
    Right...
[04:44] shu
    What were we talking about again?
[04:48] kiri
    Swimsuits! I gotta figure out what to buy!
[04:49] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro.
[04:51] ata
    I'll prepare a special surprise for
    you at the swimming competition.
[04:57] nat
    This season's come again.
[05:01] nat
    I hate swimming class so much...
[05:04] nat
    because I can't swim!
[05:07] nat
    It's always been that way...
[05:08] nat
    I've always been mocked for
    not knowing how to swim.
[05:11] nat
    In kindergarten...
[05:12] nat
    In elementary school...
[05:14] nat
    In middle school...
[05:16] nat
    Always resigned to the corner,
    swimming with a kickboard.
[05:20] sign
    Even though my name means
    "Fulfilling Summer"...
SIGN    Natsukawa Jujitsu
[05:25] sign
    But summer... Pools...
    The swimming contest...
[05:29] sign
    I wish they'd all go away!
[05:35] tawara
    For over a century since our founding,
[05:39] tawara
    the All Men Swimming Competition
    has been a tradition at our school.
[05:44] tawara
    In that time, thousands... No, tens of thousands
     of students have cast off their uniforms
[05:47] kiri
    I'm glad I went with the safe choice.
[05:50] tawara
    to bare their flesh and compete,
    bare their flesh and make friends,
[05:51] shu
    Why is the principal's speech so long?
[05:53] tawara
    bare their flesh and exercise,
    bare their flesh and argue...
[05:55] kiri
    Kyotaro, I think you're cheating.
[05:58] shu
    If I nap without a jacket, I'll get cold.
[06:01] dogo
    Taishi, let's give it our all!
SIGN    Manza Taishi
[06:05] man
    This really is humiliating...
[06:08] waku
    There's quite a few of them this year, too.
[06:11] waku
    Everyone's trying to hard
    to assert their uniqueness...
[06:18] tawa
    Now, everyone!
[06:19] tawa
    This year, as fellow disrobed
    men dripping with charm,
[06:23] tawa
    let's all fight our hardest!
[06:29] waku
    He's a bit worked up too, I see.
[06:31] tawara
    And don't forget that the Binan High
    School All Men Swimming Competition
[06:36] tawara
    includes the Pretty Boy Contest, too!
[06:38] tawara
    Now, let's get started!
[06:44] shu
    Time for a nap.
[06:47] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro.
[06:49] ata
    Your time will soon come.
[06:51] ata
    Today, you'll be the laughingstock
    of the spectators.
[07:00] karl
    Feeling good and happy!
[07:04] fura
    The fool!
[07:05] tawa
    First, on a floating platform,
[07:07] tawa
    we'll hold the inter-grade king-of-the-mountain
    event, "Butt Out! Rear-End Wrestling".
[07:13] dogo
    Nanao-senpai!
[07:14] dogo
    Let's throw out "senpai" and "kouhai"
    titles and have a fair fight!
[07:18] waku
    Well, aren't you earnest?
[07:20] tawa
    Get ready... Get set...
[07:24] tawa
    Wakura!
[07:27] wa
    Sorry about that, Ichiro-kun.
[07:30] tawa
    Next up, "The Wacky Horseback
    Obstacle Course"!
[07:34] man
    For heaven's sake.
    Why do I have to be the horse?
[07:37] shira
    You know Maasa can't be the horse!
[07:39] shira
    Good thing I beat you at rock-paper-scissors.
[07:41] una
    Maasa! Do your best!
[07:45] masa
    Of course.
[07:47] tawa
    Ready, go!
[07:50] shira
    What are you doing?
    They're getting away from us!
[07:55] man
    Enough of this nonsense...
[07:56] man
    Let the man's spirit be reborn!
[08:00] dogo
    Nice one, Taishi!
[08:02] all
    Manza! Manza! Manza!
[08:05] man
    If you're going to compete,
    it's always best to win, after all.
[08:09] shira
    I can't take it...
[08:17] fura
    The Defense Club is winning this thing!
[08:22] tawara
    "If You Fall, You Fail! Log Rodeo!"
[08:26] una
    Well, looks like I'm up.
[08:29] shira
    Senpai! Fight!
[08:31] tawara
    Ready, go!
[08:38] kiri
    Unazuki-senpai is amazing!
[08:44] una
    That was easy.
[08:48] fura
    So they have it in them after all.
[08:51] waku
    It's fun to watch them all so excited.
[08:55] tawa
    Okay, everyone!
[08:56] tawa
    It's break time!
[08:59] tawa
    The swim club and the wrestling club
    will hold a joint water acrobatics show!
SIGN    I call it, "A Brawn Flower Blooms in Binan"!
SIGN    Take it away!
[09:17] ata
    Where did Shuzenji Kyotaro go?
[09:20] ata
    I was going to put him in the loincloth relay
    and give him the embarrassment of a lifetime.
[09:27] kiri
    There you are!
[09:30] kiri
    Ata-kun, we were supposed to be in
    the chicken fight together, right?
[09:33] ata
    Yes. What about it?
[09:35] kiri
    Suzuki-kun got sick
     and can't participate.
[09:39] ata
    What?
[09:40] kiri
    But don't worry.
[09:41] kiri
    I found a stand-in.
[09:43] ata
    Oh? Who did you ask?
[09:45] kiri
    Well, it's...
[09:50] kiri
    Feels like old times, huh?
[09:54] dogo
    What's with that combination?
[09:56] man
    One of their teammates dropped out, I hear.
[10:00] dogo
    I'm surprised Kyotaro-senpai
    agreed to it, though...
[10:03] man
    I'm sure Kirishima-senpai said,
[10:05] man
    "You just have to ride on top.
     I'm begging you!"
[10:09] man
    ...and forced him into it, basically.
[10:13] waku
    Things are getting interesting here, too!
[10:16] stu
    Look at that little otter!
[10:18] stu
    Super cute!
[10:20] karl
    Blissful and happy!
[10:23] tawara
    Now, let's begin the inter-grade
    All Men Chicken Fight!
[10:27] tawara
    Start!
[10:36] kiri
    They're coming right for us!
[10:39] shu
    So sleepy...
[10:40] ata
    Don't sleep! Take this seriously!
[10:44] man
    Senpai dodged in his sleep!
[10:47] man
    They're coming back!
[10:48] man
    Come on! Wake up!
[10:59] kiri
    We did it!
[11:03] dogo
    Incredible! Kyotaro-senpai won!
[11:06] man
    That's an unexpected result.
[11:08] waku
    It really is.
[11:11] all
    Shuzenji! Shuzenji! Shuzenji! Shuzenji!
[11:13] stu
    Shuzenji-kun could win this
    month's Pretty Boy Contest!
[11:17] stu
    Yeah!
[11:18] kiri
    You did it, Kyotaro!
[11:21] shu
    What a nice nap.
[11:30] fura
    Sniff, sniff.
[11:31] fura
    I smell unhappiness at
    the best possible time.
[11:38] natsu
    With the chicken fight over,
     it's almost my turn.
[11:42] natsu
    Maybe I can still call it off...
[11:45] fura
    Why not ruin everything
    for everyone, instead?
[11:50] natsu
    Aren't you the student council?
[11:53] una
    We understand your suffering.
[11:55] una
    A competition where only
    those who swim can shine...
[11:58] una
    It's truly hell for those who can't.
[12:01] ata
    It's time for you to show them
[12:04] ata
    the suffering you feel, shuffled off to
    a corner of the pool with your kickboard.
[12:11] shira
    And then you can put an end
    to the swimming competition!
[12:22] shira
    Die Verwandlung!
[12:25] shira
    That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
[12:28] shira
    Ritter Diamant!
[12:31] shira
    Affection and comfort...
[12:33] shira
    Ritter Rosenquarz!
[12:36] shira
    Noble and virtuous!
[12:38] shira
    Ritter Amethyst!
[12:42] shira
    We are the Furanui Knights...
[12:44] shira
    Edelstein!
[12:47] shira
    Druck!
[12:48] shira
    Mich!
[12:48] shira
    Hart!
[12:51] shira
    An!
SIGN    Unazuki Taiju Born December 22nd Blood Type: O, Capricorn Hobbies: Sampling ramen Likes: Koshihikari rice, observing
[13:06] tawa
    Time for our next event:
    Kickboard Relay, Go!
[13:10] stu
    Huh? Where's Natsukawa?
[13:12] stu
    He's entered in this event.
    Where could he have gone?
[13:18] mon
    I'm right here!
[13:21] stu
    What's that?
[13:22] stu
    A kickboard?
[13:24] mon
    Kickboard Monster has appeared!
[13:28] karl
    Blissful and happy!
[13:31] karl
    What's that?
[13:33] mon
    You people!
[13:35] mon
    The swimming competition is a normie event!
[13:37] mon
    It's only for people who can swim
[13:41] mon
    and narcissists who like
    to show off their bodies!
[13:44] kiri
    Hey, Kyotaro! Wake up!
[13:45] mon
    I, Kickboard Monster, will crush
    this swimming competition!
[13:46] kiri
    Something weird is happening!
[13:50] shu
    Can I go home now?1
[13:52] karl
    You may not!
[13:54] karl
    He's in the depths of anger and suffering!
[13:58] karl
    We need to make him happy!
[14:01] waku
    Another round of the usual, then?
[14:06] karl
    As prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
[14:09] karl
    Become Karl's Knights Happy Kiss
    and save the people!
[14:24] karl
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[15:01] karl
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[15:14] karl
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[15:28] karl
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[15:41] karl
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[15:53] karl
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[15:58] karl
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[16:01] karl
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[16:03] karl
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[16:06] karl
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[16:08] karl
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[16:11] karl
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[16:15] karl
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[16:19] karl
    Knights contract complete!
[16:23] mon
    Who are you people?
[16:24] mon
    With those outfits, you must
    be more summer-loving normies!
[16:28] mon
    I, Kickboard Monster, shall destroy you!
[16:29] kiri
    That's one backwards kickboard.
[16:32] dogo
    Backwards kickboard?
[16:33] dogo
    So you wouldn't move forward
    no matter how hard you kick!
[16:37] man
    That's not how he meant it...
[16:39] float
    What are you people jabbering about?
[16:43] float
    Listen! Kickboards are the symbol
    of people who can't swim!
[16:47] float
    People leave me one by one
    as they learn how to swim,
[16:50] float
    and enjoy summer swimming all on their own!
[16:54] float
    But I'm going to show you.
[16:57] float
    There are poor people out there who have
    to swim with a kickboard all their lives!
[17:03] mon
    Kickboards!
[17:05] kiri
    He's throwing kickboards!
[17:11] mon
    How dare you dodge them!
[17:13] mon
    Then it's time for...
[17:14] mon
    Kickboard Kick!
[17:20] dogo
    Kickboard kicks... That takes me back!
[17:23] dogo
    We used to do that back in the swimming club!
[17:25] dogo
    In the kids' program!
[17:27] mon
    Kids' program?!
[17:29] mon
    Are you telling me I'll
    be a kid all my life?!
[17:32] dogo
    That wasn't what I meant...
[17:34] mon
    Now, Kickboard Flutter Kick!
[17:38] waku
    I reached 18th rank in the 15
    meter kickboard flutter kick.
[17:44] mon
    18th rank?!
[17:45] waku
    Well, I cleared it easily when I was three.
[17:49] kiri
    How far did you go?
[17:51] waku
    I quit at 1st rank.
[17:52] waku
    I was probably around 2nd grade by then.
[17:57] man
    He looks really mad about something...
[18:00] mon
    How dare you mock kickboards!
[18:04] mon
    It's time for...
[18:05] mon
    Kickboard Screw!
[18:11] dogo
    This is really bad!
[18:13] kiri
    What should we do, Kyotaro?
[18:15] kiri
    He's gone!
[18:17] waku
    He's over there.
[18:28] shira
    That's my oyster shell float!
[18:33] mon
    You, there! How dare you relax in here?
[18:36] shu
    But it's silly, isn't it?
[18:38] ---
    What?!
[18:39] shu
    Everyone has their own strengths
    and weaknesses, right?
[18:45] shu
    Some people are bad at the high bar.
[18:47] shu
    Some are bad at jump-rope.
[18:49] shu
    Some are bad at running.
[18:51] shu
    Some are bad at academics,
    at cooking, at athletics...
[18:55] mon
    T-True...
[18:57] shu
    So you just got the short end
    of the stick on swimming, right?
[19:01] mon
    That's true, but...
[19:04] mon
    Because of that, summers are...
    Summers are really hard on me...
[19:08] shu
    There are lots of ways to enjoy
    summer, even if you can't swim.
[19:12] shu
    My favorite summer thing
[19:14] shu
    is lazing around in front of a fan
    after getting out of a hot bath.
[19:21] karl
    Now, everyone! Go!
[19:23] shu
    Come on, Kyotaro!
[19:25] shu
    Get over here already!
[19:28] shu
    This scallop shell seemed really
    nice for napping, though...
[19:32] shira
    It's not a scallop shell!
    It's an oyster shell!
[19:35] shira
    Now! Use your powers
    combined to make him happy!
[19:38] shira
    Are you happy?
[19:39] shira
    Yes!
[19:40] shira
    Are you happy?
[19:41] shira
    Yes!
[19:41] shira
    Are you happy?
[19:43] shira
    Yes!
[19:43] shira
    Are you happy?
[19:44] shira
    Yes!
[19:45] shira
    Are you happy?
[19:46] shira
    Yes!
[19:46] shira
    Let's happy hour!
[19:50] shira
    Happy and Set!
[20:03] shira
    Return to happiness!
[20:05] shira
    Happy and Turn!
[20:17] mon
    I'm floating without a kickboard right now...
[20:24] shu
    Happy End!
[20:26] shu
    Happy Powder!
[20:36] natsu
    What? What was I...
[20:40] stu
    Wow! Was that Natsukawa?
[20:42] stu
    I've never gotten to watch
    a hero show this close up!
[20:45] stu
    That was really cool, Natsukawa!
[20:45] stu
    Natsukawa! Natsukawa! Natsukawa! Natsukawa!
[20:54] natsu
    They're calling my name...
[20:58] natsu
    The kickboard became a hero!
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:06] shu
    I'm exhausted.
[21:08] kiri
    But I'm happy for that
    Natsukawa kid, at least.
[21:12] dogo
    Yeah, he won the Pretty Boy Contest!
[21:15] man
    But unfortunately, he won't remember it.
[21:18] karl
    Oh, about that.
[21:21] karl
    For the sake of his happiness,
[21:22] karl
    I allowed him to retain just his
    memory of winning the contest.
[21:26] waku
    I guess he'll be having the "fulfilling
    summer" in his name for the first time ever.
[21:33] dogo
    What about us, then?
[21:35] dogo
    It's almost summer break!
[21:37] kiri
    Summer break, huh?
[21:40] kiri
    Hey, Kyotaro. What should we do?
[21:42] shu
    Nothing.
[21:43] shu
    I'm tired. I just want to sleep.
[21:46] karl
    More blissful and happy!
[21:52] ata
    After I worked so hard
    to arrange my surprise...
[21:56] shira
    Ibusuki-senpai, what are you doing?
[21:59] shira
    Huh? Are those loincloths?
[22:03] ibu
    No, they're...
[22:05] una
    Too bad.
[22:07] una
    You wanted to spring a surprise
    loincloth relay on them, right?
[22:13] fura
    But we haven't lost to them at all.
[22:17] fura
    Next time, we shall prove that we
    are the leading men of this world!
[22:23] fura
    --
SIGN    HAPPY Endless Summer
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Endless Summer!"
SIGN    What to do with 40 days of summer vacation? There's the beach, camping, fireworks...!
SIGN    It all goes away when you grow up, so enjoy it while you can! (argh)

Season 4

8 - HAPPY Endless Summer

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:09] shu
    Such a lazy day.
[00:13] kiri
    Shouldn't we be doing more than this?
[00:16] kiri
    It's summer vacation, but we're hanging
    out at the Kurotama Bath like usual...
[00:20] shu
    What's the problem?
[00:24] karl
    Hey! What are you guys doing,
     lazing around here?
[00:28] karl
    A brilliant Earth institution known
    as summer vacation is transpiring!
[00:31] karl
    We need to enjoy it, happy-style!
[00:33] shu
    Here comes Mr. Enthusiasm.
[00:35] waku
    It's hot enough in here already.
[00:37] kiri
    Huh? He seems different than usual...
[00:41] karu
    Dye your hair, pierce your ears,
    ride off on a stolen bike!
[00:47] karu
    I hear that's what Japanese
    summer vacation is all about!
[00:49] kiri
    No, I think you've been misinformed.
[00:52] karu
    What did you say?!
[00:55] dogo
    You're like a nerd trying to change
    his image over summer break.
[00:57] ban
    Summer break image changes
[00:59] ban
    are a phenomenon related to increased
    serotonin production in the brain,
[01:01] ban
    which is caused by the
    longer periods of sunlight.
[01:06] ban
    Serotonin regulates the balance
    between dopamine and adrenaline,
[01:12] ban
    so it fills one with an increased desire
     to stand out and attract the opposite sex.
[01:19] karl
    Just what does a proper Japanese
    summer vacation consist of, then?!
[01:24] shu
    Good question.
[01:26] shu
    I'd say...
[01:29] dogo
    We are aliens!
[01:31] shu
    For instance.
[01:34] man
    Who put mosquito incense here?!
[01:37] shu
    For instance.
[01:40] kiri
    I thought it was barley tea,
    but it's dipping broth!
[01:43] shu
    For instance.
[01:45] karu
    That's a proper Japanese summer vacation?!
[01:47] karu
    That's not at all what I learned
    in my tributary rule classes!
[01:52] kiri
    What did you learn?
[01:53] karl
    You sleep in late every day,
[01:55] karl
    play three baseball games a day,
[01:59] karl
    and on the last day of summer vacation
[02:01] karl
    you cry and get your family
    to help you with your homework!
[02:03] karl
    Right?
[02:04] waku
    So your textbook was a certain
    long-running anime, was it?
[02:08] shu
    It seems accurate... yet inaccurate.
[02:14] karl
    Anyway, we mustn't waste a single day!
[02:17] karl
    We need to hurry up and have a proper
    summer vacation. Let's be happy together!
SIGN    HAPPY Endless Summer
[03:58] sign
    Question 1
    Defense Club
    What is a proper summer vacation?
[04:01] karl
    Anyone with an opinion?
[04:02] dogo
    Me, me, me, me!
[04:04] dogo
    Beach! Fireworks! Camping!
[04:06] waku
    Summer's not complete without
    watermelon smashing.
[04:09] dogo
    Great idea!
[04:10] dogo
    And what about nagashi-somen?
[04:15] man
    Shaved ice, too.
[04:18] kiri
    Chilled ramen is summery, too!
[04:20] [SONG] sign
    Chilled Ramen Shaved Ice Nagashi-Somen
    Watermelon Smashing Camping
     Fireworks Beach
[04:24] karl
    It's all so summery
    and bursting with happiness!
[04:28] kiri
    Let's decide what to do with a show of hands.
[04:32] all
    I'm in!
[04:33] kiri
    Okay, first. Who wants to go to the beach?
[04:35] dogo
    Me, me, me!
[04:38] shu
    Going to the beach in this season is suicide.
[04:42] shu
    The seas will be swarming with jellyfish.
[04:44] wak
    Well, I wouldn't want
    to be swarmed...
[04:47] dogo
    What happens if a jellyfish stings you?
[04:49] man
    Some say it increases your chances
    of developing a natto allergy.
[04:53] dogo
    I won't be able to eat natto?! I'm out!
SIGN    Beach
[04:58] kiri
    The beach is out.
[04:59] kiri
    Next, who wants to go see fireworks?
[05:02] kiri
    Me, me!
[05:05] shu
    Those events are so crowded.
[05:07] shu
    They pack you in like sardines.
[05:10] wak
    Well, I wouldn't want
    to be packed...
[05:11] dogo
    Packed in like sardines?
    You couldn't go home if you wanted to!
[05:14] man
    To advance would be hell.
    To retreat would be hell.
SIGN    Fireworks
[05:19] kiri
    Fireworks are out, too?
[05:23] kiri
    Next, who wants to go camping?
[05:25] all
    Me!
[05:31] shu
    Isn't camping just living out of a tent?
[05:34] kiri
    Fine, I guess they're all out!
[05:37] [SONG] sign
    All!!
[05:39] karl
    We ended up not picking anything.
[05:42] shu
    No need to rush.
[05:43] shu
    We have a lot of time left.
[05:44] kiri
    There's only one day left!
[05:49] karl
    When am I gonna get to enjoy
     a proper Japanese summer vacation?!
SIGN    Radio Calisthenics
SIGN    How to Rule a Tributary
[05:59] karl
    It says radio calisthenics are a
    classic summer vacation activity!
[06:03] karl
    Let's do it together and happy up!
[06:07] shu
    Can't.
[06:08] shu
    Radio calisthenics have
    to be done in the morning.
[06:11] kiri
    But he's not against the act itself...
[06:13] karl
    But it's our chance to enjoy
    a proper summer vacation!
[06:16] man
    Oh?
SIGN    Participation
     Card
[06:25] dogo
    He's camping!
[06:26] kiri
    I think he's just living out of a tent.
[06:28] waku
    Isn't that Rashio Taison
    from the class next to ours?
SIGN    Rashio Taison
[06:34] kiri
    What? That guy's in high school?
[06:36] waku
    I heard he's failed to graduate
    almost ten times.
[06:40] dogo
    Does that mean... uh,
    how old would he be now?
[06:44] shu
    What's he doing?
[06:45] dogo
    Camping?
[06:47] dogo
    No... living out of a tent?
[06:51] kiri
    What exactly is the difference between
    camping and living out of a tent?
[06:55] waku
    I feel like a certain
    spirit of fun is required.
[06:59] man
    Yeah, the primary qualifier would be
    whether or not you chose to be there.
[07:03] man
    When you do it of your own
    free will, you're camping.
[07:04] man
    When you're forced into it,
    you're living out of a tent.
[07:07] shu
    Even though everything else
    is basically the same.
[07:12] dogo
    Excuse me!
[07:14] dogo
    What are you doing?
[07:17] man
    He talked to him.
[07:19] ra
    Isn't it obvious? I'm waiting
    for radio calisthenics.
[07:23] kiri
    Why?
[07:25] ra
    I don't want to be late
    to tomorrow's radio calisthenics,
[07:29] ra
    so I'm staying the night
    here instead of going home.
SIGN    Participation Card
[07:37] shi
    I've been nurturing my passion for radio
    calisthenics ever since I was in elementary school.
[07:42] shi
    I've participated every morning,
    without fail, and gotten every single stamp.
[07:47] shi
    Yet on the 31st, every year,
    I always fail to participate!
SIGN    Saturday
[07:54] ra
    My alarm clock malfunctions...
[08:05] ra
    I get trapped by unforeseen circumstances...
[08:08] ra
    Then, last year, I ran into the most
    ridiculous obstacle imaginable!
[08:13] ra
    It's become a curse!
[08:20] ra
    I can't graduate until I
    get the stamp for the 31st!
[08:25] kiri
    Is that why you haven't graduated?
[08:27] ra
    This year, at last, I will break the curse!
[08:30] ra
    Until I get that stamp,
[08:32] ra
    my summer vacation will never end!
[08:36] karl
    Everyone has their own form
    of summer vacation, I guess.
[08:46] una
    A tropical island isn't a bad
    way to spend summer vacation.
[08:50] ibu
    Indeed.
[08:51] shira
    Aww. I guess summer vacation is over.
[08:55] fura
    Sniff, sniff, sniff.
[08:56] fura
    I smell the odor of unhappiness.
[09:06] [SONG] sign
    Canceled today (31st)
    due to rain
[09:12] ra
    Why...
[09:15] sign
    Why must you get in my way?
SIGN    Shirahone Martha Born November 3rd Blood Type: AB Scorpio Hobbies: Making sweets Likes: Carbohydrates, handing out handmade sweets
[09:28] news
    And now for the weather.
[09:30] news
    We'll be seeing heavy rains
    in the Binan City area.
[09:40] ibu
    Is that...
[09:41] fura
    He's about to explode from
    resentment and anger.
[09:45] fura
    It's time for us to spread fear.
[09:51] ra
    Until I complete radio calisthenics properly,
    my summer vacation will never end!
[09:55] ra
    You can't call it off because of rain!
[09:59] ibu
    Your feelings are entirely reasonable.
[10:01] ibu
    Just because it's summer vacation
[10:03] ibu
    doesn't mean students shouldn't have
    structure in their daily lives.
[10:07] ibu
    Your daily radio calisthenics
    participation is a symbol of that,
[10:11] ibu
    but society continually gets in your way.
[10:15] ibu
    This is unacceptable.
[10:17] ra
    Aren't you guys... the student council...
[10:20] ibu
    In this fallen world,
[10:22] ibu
    don't you want to teach people
    the value of proper structure?
[10:32] ibu
    Die Verwandlung!
[10:36] ibu
    That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
[10:38] ibu
    Ritter Diamant!
[10:42] ibu
    Affection and comfort...
[10:43] ibu
    Ritter Rosenquarz!
[10:47] ibu
    Noble and virtuous!
[10:48] ibu
    Ritter Amethyst!
[10:52] ibu
    We are the Furanui Knights...
[10:54] ibu
    Edelstein!
[10:57] ibu
    Druck!
[10:58] ibu
    Mich!
[10:59] ibu
    Hart!
[11:02] ibu
    An!
[11:11] mon
    One, two, three, four! Two, two, three, four!
[11:17] karl
    Oh no, oh no!
[11:19] karl
    I got caught up in the routine
    and let the day slip by!
[11:23] karl
    It's the 31st already!
[11:25] karl
    It's the last day of summer vacation!
[11:27] karl
    Are you just going to let it
    end without doing anything?!
[11:30] waku
    What do you want?
[11:31] waku
    It's pouring outside.
[11:32] waku
    We can't go anywhere.
[11:34] waku
    I'm getting a chill. I'm going back in.
[11:36] karl
    We've had enough of the bath!
[11:39] karl
    We need to have a proper Japanese summer!
[11:41] shu
    But... we can't, not in this weather.
[11:48] shu
    Well, in that case...
[11:50] karl
    Do we have a deal?
[11:52] shu
    I guess.
[11:53] kiri
    What do you mean, a deal.
[11:56] shu
    It means we're about to have a proper
    Japanese summer vacation together.
[12:00] kiri
    What? But you were so against it! Why?
[12:07] karl
    Someone's unhappy!
[12:13] mon
    One, two, three, four!
[12:15] mon
    Two, two, three, four!
[12:17] mon
    Three, two, three, four!
[12:20] mon
    Four, two, three, four!
[12:20] man
    Huh? I can't stop...
[12:22] mon
    Five, two, three, four!
[12:24] mon
    Six, two, three, four!
[12:36] mon
    Until I achieve my heart's desire,
[12:38] mon
    I'll never let summer vacation end!
[12:41] mon
    It will be August 31st forever!
[12:50] kiri
    What's he doing?
[12:51] man
    He's forcing the whole town
    to do radio calisthenics!
[12:55] dogo
    I can't believe how inconsiderate he is!
[12:57] waku
    Yeah.
[12:58] kiri
    Leader, what should we do?
[13:00] shu
    Are we still doing that?
[13:02] karl
    He's currently in the depths
    of anger and suffering!
[13:06] karl
    We need to make him happy!
[13:08] karl
    Or so I'd like to say...
[13:10] karl
    But first we need to have
    our proper summer vacation!
[13:14] karl
    Let's go, everyone!
[13:19] mon
    Hey! Don't ignore me!
[13:21] mon
    Wait up! Come back!
[13:24] karl
    First, we're going to the beach!
[13:27] dogo
    It's f-freezing!
[13:31] karl
    Everyone... smile!
[13:41] karl
    Now, time for watermelon smashing!
[13:44] kiri
    Wakura-senpai, more to the right!
[13:47] waku
    This way?
[13:50] kiri
    No, no! Right! Right!
[13:52] waku
    What? This way?
[13:58] kiri
    Wakura-senpai...
[14:01] waku
    Aw, so close.
[14:03] karu
    Time to get moving!
[14:05] karu
    Next up is...
[14:09] mon
    Don't ignore me!
[14:12] shu
    Sorry, but we're a bit busy right now.
[14:15] shu
    What's next?
[14:16] karl
    Nagashi-somen, go!
[14:18] karl
    Karurururu!
[14:21] mon
    Wait! Wait!
[14:25] mon
    You just gotta have cold stuff in summer!
[14:38] karl
    Okay, time to move on!
[14:40] karl
    Where are we going next?
[14:42] karl
    Camping!
[14:43] man
    Not living in tents?
[14:44] dogo
    If it's in the spirit of fun,
    it's camping! Right?
[14:49] waku
    That's right.
[14:50] kiri
    This feels less "spirit of fun"
    and more "spirit of fear," though...
[14:58] karl
    Everyone, fight hard!
[15:00] karl
    Fight hard, fight happy!
[15:07] mon
    I won't let you escape this time!
[15:09] waku
    He's back.
[15:11] dogo
    So persistent!
[15:13] man
    He knows we're busy right now, dammit!
[15:15] kiri
    Taishi?
[15:19] man
    Focus on lighting the fire.
[15:21] mon
    I'm telling you not to ignore me!
[15:26] mon
    He did it!
[15:28] kiri
    Thank you, monster!
[15:29] kiri
    Thanks so much!
[15:30] mon
    Heck, it's nothing...
[15:32] kiri
    A little token of our gratitude.
[15:34] mon
    I'm honored.
[15:40] mon
    Hey! Hey!
[15:43] kiri
    I guess we should deal with this first?
[15:45] shu
    Yeah, I guess we should.
[15:48] karl
    Yeah, I guess we'll transform!
[15:50] karl
    Become Karl's Knights Happy Kiss
    and save the people!
[16:04] karl
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[16:40] karl
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[16:54] karl
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[17:07] karl
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[17:21] karl
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[17:33] karl
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[17:38] karl
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[17:41] karl
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[17:43] karl
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[17:46] karl
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[17:48] karl
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[17:51] karl
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[17:55] karl
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[17:59] karl
    Knights contract complete!
[18:02] man
    Stop dragging others into
    your personal obsession!
[18:04] dogo
    If you wanna do radio calisthenics that bad,
     just do them by yourself!
[18:08] mon
    But, at this rate, it will never end!
[18:10] mon
    I need my last summer as a
    student to end in perfection!
[18:14] shu
    Is it really something
    to get that worked up about?
[18:17] shu
    You can still do radio calisthenics
    even if you're not a student.
[18:21] kiri
    My grandpa does radio calisthenics
    every morning all year round.
[18:28] mon
    You can do radio calisthenics
    even if you're not a student?
[18:34] mon
    You can do radio calisthenics
    even if it's not summer vacation?
[18:39] mon
    So even if summer vacation ends...
[18:42] mon
    Even if I graduate from school...
[18:44] mon
    My radio calisthenics will continue forever!
[18:49] mon
    Now! Use your powers
    combined to make him happy!
[18:53] mon
    Are you happy?
[18:54] mon
    Yes!
[18:54] mon
    Are you happy?
[18:56] mon
    Yes!
[18:56] mon
    Are you happy?
[18:57] mon
    Yes!
[18:58] mon
    Are you happy?
[18:59] mon
    Yes!
[18:59] mon
    Are you happy?
[19:00] mon
    Yes!
[19:01] mon
    Let's happy hour!
[19:04] mon
    Happy and Set!
[19:17] mon
    Return to happiness!
[19:20] mon
    Happy and Turn!
[19:31] mon
    I feel radio calis-cleansed.
[19:39] shu
    Happy End!
[19:41] shu
    Happy Powder!
[19:52] ra
    Huh?
[19:53] ra
    What am I doing out in the mountains?
[19:59] shu
    It's morning, huh?
[20:01] karl
    It's morning!
[20:02] karl
    Time to do radio calisthenics!
[20:07] ra
    Okay, let's look alive here!
[20:09] ra
    We'll start with some arm swings!
[20:14] ra
    One, two, three, four!
[20:17] ra
    Two, two, three, four!
[20:21] ra
    Four, two, three, four!
[20:24] ra
    Five, two, three, four!
[20:28] ra
    Six, two, three, four!
[20:32] ra
    C'mon! I can't hear you!
[20:33] ra
    You! Move your arms more!
[20:36] ra
    Yes sir!
[20:40] una
    Now, now.
[20:41] una
    We'll have more chances in the new school term.
[20:53] shira
    Wait a minute, Ibusuki-senpai!
[20:59] kiri
    By the way, what was the
    deal you made with Karls?
[21:06] (Flashback) kar
    If you let me have a proper summer vacation,
[21:08] (Flashback) kar
    I'll grant any wish you want with magic.
[21:12] kiri
    So, what did you wish for?
[21:14] shu
    For summer vacation to last one more day.
[21:17] shu
    I want to spend it doing nothing.
[21:22] kiri
    Which means today is August 31st again?
[21:26] waku
    So, in a strange way,
    he got his heart's desire.
[21:30] kiri
    Should we tell him?
[21:31] waku
    No, no reason to.
[21:33] dogo
    W-Wait a minute!
[21:35] dogo
    Then today isn't the 31st! It's the 32nd!
[21:39] man
    What would the 32nd be?
[21:41] dogo
    If we have a second 31st,
    it would be the 32nd!
[21:46] dogo
    Or would it be a first September 1st?
[21:48] dogo
    Would that make tomorrow
    the second September 1st?
[21:54] waku
    It's a real philosophical
    conundrum, isn't it?
[21:58] shu
    Let's just not think about it.
[22:01] kiri
    Good idea.
[22:02] kiri
    It's still summer vacation,
    so let's do something fun!
[22:05] shu
    I want to take it as easy as possible.
[22:07] dogo
    Me, me, me!
[22:09] dogo
    Fireworks, fireworks, fireworks!
[22:10] dogo
    Let's do a fireworks show!
[22:11] man
    Is a fireworks show a thing that you do?
[22:14] man
    They're a thing you go to, I thought.
[22:15] waku
    Yeah.
[22:16] dogo
    Let's go to a fireworks show
     and firework it up!
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    HAPPY Dice
SIGN    Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to HAPPY Dice!
SIGN    It's cultural festival time again, and everyone's running around in a panic to get ready! Of course, in the anime industry, every day is like the day before a cultural festival (sigh)
SIGN    The club brings out a party die. What'll we get? What'll we get? La la la laaa!
SIGN    

Season 4

9 - HAPPY Dice

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    HAPPY Dice
[01:47] shu
    Cultural festival, eh?
[01:49] shu
    Yeah.
[01:49] shu
    Cultural festival, huh?
[01:51] shu
    Yeah.
[01:53] shu
    A festival of culture,
     by students, for students, huh?
[01:57] kiri
    Just call it a cultural festival.
[01:59] kiri
    But our club hasn't figured out what
    we're going to do yet, have we?
[02:02] waku
    We keep whispering "cultural festival" to
    make it sound like we're thinking about it.
[02:08] dogo
    If the Defense Club doesn't do anything,
     the student council's gonna get on our asses.
[02:12] dogo
    "If you don't participate,
    you won't get any funds."
[02:15] man
    And, more generally speaking, our nation's
    educational principles require student attendance,
[02:21] man
    in other words, participation,
     in cultural festivals through high school.
[02:24] man
    It will be counted on our attendance days,
    so in that sense we really should do something.
[02:28] shu
    That's why I've been thinking all this time.
[02:31] kiri
    Uh, you haven't really been thinking.
[02:33] waku
    It looks like you've just been
    comfortably soaking in the hot water.
[02:37] waku
    Like usual.
[02:39] dogo
    We need you to get a grip already!
[02:41] dogo
    We rolled a die and decided that you are
    our cultural festival leader, Kyotaro-senpai!
[02:46] shu
    Yeah, I know.
[02:49] kar
    Oh?
[02:51] kar
    There's a not-happy vibe going on in here.
[02:54] kar
    What's the matter?
[02:56] shu
    We can't figure out what to
    do for the cultural festival.
[02:59] shu
    Any ideas, Karls?
[03:01] kiri
    There he goes, leaving it to someone else.
[03:03] waku
    He doesn't even know about
    Earth cultural festivals.
[03:06] shu
    I just think Karls might have an idea.
[03:09] shu
    Something that will make everyone happy.
[03:11] kar
    Make everyone happy?
[03:14] kar
    That sounds great!
[03:15] shu
    See?
[03:17] shu
    What do you think we should do?
[03:18] kar
    Something that will lead my
    vassals to happiness, of course!
[03:22] shu
    Like what?
[03:23] kar
    Maybe... something that will
    make them smile happily!
[03:25] shu
    Good idea.
[03:27] kar
    Yeah! Being happy is the best!
[03:30] shu
    Yeah.
[03:31] kiri
    I'm not sure we can leave
    things up to these two.
[03:33] waku
    We're not gonna make it in time.
[03:34] dogo
    We need to think of something.
[03:36] man
    Let's search the club room tomorrow.
[03:39] man
    We might find a relic of some past festival.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[03:45] kiri
    What are these weird old sedge hats?
[03:47] dogo
    Maybe they were used in
    some kind of performance?
[03:49] dogo
    A performance using sedge hats would be...
[03:52] kiri
    The loach-scooping dance, maybe?
[03:53] waku
    That uses baskets.
[03:55] waku
    Though I'd love to see you
    scooping loaches, Ryoma-kun.
[03:58] kiri
    R-Really?
[04:00] shu
    We could use this.
SIGN    The person to my right
[04:03] sign
    Here.
[04:05] sign
    What's that?
[04:09] sign
    Um... These are party dice.
[04:13] sign
    I see.
[04:14] dogo
    It says stuff like "roughly"
    and "gently" on it.
[04:19] man
    This one says stuff like "to their senpai",
[04:22] man
    "to the person on their right",
[04:24] man
    "to a stranger".
[04:27] kiri
    This one says stuff like
    "give a shoulder massage"
[04:29] kiri
    and "carry like a princess".
[04:31] waku
    Titillating stuff.
[04:34] shu
    Anyway, let's try it out.
[04:36] shu
    If it's fun, we can use it at
    tomorrow's cultural festival.
[04:41] dogo
    Do it?
[04:42] dogo
    Us, you mean?
SIGN    Now
[04:44] shu
    Anyway... Rehearsal, start!
[04:47] kar
    Okay!
[04:49] kar
    What'll we roll? What'll we roll?
[04:52] kar
    Nya-nya-nya-nyan!
[04:54] shu
    There.
[04:56] shu
    "Immediately..."
[04:58] shu
    "The person to my left..."
[05:00] shu
    "Must act as an invisible chair
     for the oldest person present."
[05:05] kiri
    Um...
[05:06] kiri
    Does that mean...
[05:08] shu
    The person to my left,
     that is Chiro,
[05:12] shu
    must act as an invisible chair
    for the oldest person here.
[05:16] shu
    In other words, Nanao-san.
[05:19] dogo
    I-Invisible chair?
[05:22] dogo
    For Nanao-senpai?
[05:24] shu
    Yeah. Can't wait to see it.
[05:26] karu
    Yeah! Fun is fun!
[05:28] karu
    Okay, let's get happy!
[05:32] waku
    Be gentle.
[05:33] dogo
    Th-That's my line!
[05:37] waku
    This is a very comfortable seat, Ichiro-kun.
[05:43] waku
    You're slender, yet you seem
    to have very developed thighs.
[05:46] dogo
    H-How long do I have to hold this?
[05:49] shu
    Um. It doesn't say.
[05:52] shu
    Until you give up, I guess?
[05:54] dogo
    Then I give! I give up!
[05:57] waku
    That's too bad.
[05:58] waku
    I was hoping to relax a little while longer.
[06:03] waku
    I can, can't I, Ichiro-kun?
[06:06] kiri
    Senpai is such a sadist...
[06:07] dogo
    This is a lot more painful than it looks!
[06:10] dogo
    B-Besides, Nanao-senpai's scent...
[06:13] dogo
    It's like... it smells so good,
    I can't concentrate!
[06:16] shu
    Oh, does Nanao-san smell good?
[06:19] kiri
    What shampoo do you use?
[06:22] waku
    It's mild, good for hair and skin,
    and I like the champagne rose scent.
[06:29] dogo
    C-Champagne rose...
[06:31] dogo
    I give up.
[06:34] waku
    Excuse me. Are you all right?
[06:36] dogo
    O-Of course I'm not okay!
[06:39] waku
    It's true, your heart
    does seem to be pounding.
[06:44] kar
    That was great!
[06:45] kar
    They're exuding a happy aura!
[06:47] kiri
    A happy aura?
[06:49] shu
    It looks like it to me.
[06:50] man
    Is this game really okay?
[06:52] kar
    Of course it is!
[06:54] kar
    They both look so happy!
SIGN    Binan Festival
[07:02] [SONG] sign
    Binan Festival
[07:07] sa
    How can they persistently hold this
    ridiculous event year upon year?
SIGN    Sai Goro
[07:11] sa
    What's the school thinking? The government?
[07:14] sa
    Do schools really need a cultural festival?
[07:17] sa
    Is it absolutely indispensable
    as part of a general education?
[07:19] sa
    The answer is no!
[07:21] sa
    These are the dice created by me,
    for me alone, Sai Goro.
[07:26] sa
    I'll come up with a significant
    plan for the day and carry it out!
[07:30] sa
    I won't be swept away by their attitudes!
[07:36] sa
    Today I will, with my fellow entrance examinees,
    individually study for entrance exams.
[07:42] sa
    Perfect.
[07:45] ata
    In this decadent school, he's a rare case
    of someone rigidly setting their own schedule.
[07:50] una
    Even if it is with dice.
[07:52] shira
    I think the nerdy kids are the cutest!
[07:57] furu
    Then let us begin, Edelstein!
[08:02] una
    Sai Goro-kun, isn't it?
[08:04] sai
    What of it?
[08:05] ina
    Would you like to join us in bringing
    the hammer of judgment down
[08:09] ina
    upon this fallen school
    and its ridiculous cultural festival?
[08:13] shi
    By becoming a monster.
[08:21] shi
    Die Verwandlung!
[08:24] shi
    That which is unbreakable is truly strong!
[08:27] shi
    Ritter Diamant!
[08:30] shi
    Affection and comfort...
[08:31] shi
    Ritter Rosenquarz!
[08:35] shi
    Noble and virtuous!
[08:37] shi
    Ritter Amethyst!
[08:40] shi
    We are the Furanui Knights...
[08:43] shi
    Edelstein!
[08:46] shi
    Druck!
[08:47] shi
    Mich!
[08:47] shi
    Hart!
[08:50] shi
    An!
[08:59] mon
    Rollin', rollin'!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[09:03] kiri
    We're doing it again?
[09:05] shu
    Well, it has been kind of fun.
[09:08] man
    You probably think that because you
    haven't been through it yourself.
[09:12] karl
    But fun stuff is good!
[09:15] karl
    And it makes people happy!
[09:17] karl
    Let's keep it up!
[09:18] shu
    Okay, next, Tai-Tai will roll the dice.
[09:21] man
    Why me?!
[09:23] man
    What'll we roll? What'll we roll?
[09:27] man
    Nya-nya-nya-nyan!
[09:29] kiri
    There's a man who knows how to act.
[09:31] man
    Given your attitudes, if I choose not to do it,
    I'll be called a party-pooper.
[09:36] dogo
    Smart! That's the Taishi I know!
[09:38] shu
    Okay, I'll read out the result.
[09:41] shu
    I, in other words Tai-Tai,
[09:44] shu
    will immediately to a friend...
     that would be Chiro, in this case...
[09:47] dogo
    Me again?!
[09:49] man
    You had it coming.
[09:51] shu
    ...put an arm around his shoulders
    and gently read the lines on the note.
[09:54] shu
    In other words, Tai-Tai must
    immediately put an arm around Chiro
[09:58] shu
    and gently read the lines on this note.
[10:01] kiri
    What are the lines?
[10:05] kiri
    What does it say?
[10:07] man
    Something I never thought I'd say in my life.
[10:12] shu
    Okay, Tai-Tai. Put your arm
    gently around Chiro's shoulders.
[10:16] man
    Don't make it sound so easy!
[10:18] wa
    If you want to hate someone, hate the dice.
[10:21] kiri
    Hmm? Did you just click your tongue?
[10:25] man
    I certainly did not.
[10:28] man
    It's not like I'm a delinquent.
[10:30] man
    Well, here I go.
[10:32] shu
    Okay, go for it.
[10:37] dogo
    I dunno about this...
[10:38] man
    That's my line.
[10:41] shu
    Now, read the words on the note.
[10:43] dogo
    Is it really that bad?
[10:47] dogo
    Let's just get it over with!
[10:51] man
    Very well.
[10:53] man
    But I'm only doing this
    because the dice made me.
[10:56] dogo
    Just say it already!
[11:03] man
    The next thing I knew,
    I realized my eyes were always on you.
[11:08] man
    Your most trivial mannerisms
    cause my heart to skip a beat.
[11:11] man
    Tell me, please...
[11:14] man
    is this love?
[11:19] waku
    You finally said it! Great job.
[11:22] man
    I was forced to say it!
[11:24] kiri
    But you put so much emotion into it!
[11:26] kar
    Yeah, yeah!
[11:27] kar
    You're radiating a happy aura!
[11:29] shu
    This plan is a lot of fun.
[11:32] man
    Shuzenji-senpai, Kirishima-senpai...
[11:34] man
    you're just smiling because
    you haven't had to do it.
[11:36] dogo
    That's right! Is this really
    what we're gonna do?
[11:39] shu
    Well, it seems like a pain
     to come up with something else.
[11:43] sai
    Rollin' rollin'...
[11:45] sai
    What a ridiculous set of dice!
[11:48] sai
    They must pay!
SIGN    Karls Born February 4th Blood Type: O Aquarius Hobbies: Playing in the water Likes: Crayfish, hot baths
SIGN    Binan Festival
SIGN    Oden
SIGN    Curry Rice Takoyaki
[12:12] dogo
    This isn't good, Kyotaro-senpai.
[12:14] dogo
    We're not getting any customers.
[12:17] kar
    I wonder why!
[12:18] kar
    It would make everybody happy...
[12:21] waku
    By the way, why are you in that form, Karls?
[12:25] kar
    Everyone's transforming into something today,
[12:27] kar
    so I transformed into a human!
[12:29] shu
    Cosplay?
[12:30] wak
    Ah, I see...
[12:32] wak
    All that aside,
[12:34] wak
    what should we do, given the situation?
[12:37] man
    Looks like we'll just need to have
    Shuzenji-senpai act as a shill and roll the die.
[12:42] shu
    That's strange.
[12:44] shu
    I wonder why nobody's coming.
[12:46] kiri
    They might not, given that sign.
SIGN    Hey, Bastards, Get Over Here! The All-Men Heart-Racing Dice Party Plaza
[12:53] man
    What is that? Creepy.
[12:56] shu
    Isn't it flashy enough?
[12:57] dogo
    I don't think that's the problem...
[13:00] waku
    Well, it accurately conveys
    our lack of effort.
[13:03] man
    And our desire to never, ever do it.
[13:07] kiri
    We'll be in trouble if this keeps up, though.
[13:10] kiri
    I mean, they're looking at us...
[13:12] kiri
    The student council.
[13:14] kar
    Why don't we all do it together, then,
    and attract people through the fun we're having!
[13:18] waku
    That might be the thing to do.
[13:20] dogo
    Okay. Kyotaro-senpai, take it away!
SIGN    Give a kiss
[13:23] man
    Here you go.
[13:25] shu
    No way. It's embarrassing.
[13:27] dogo
    How dare you?!
[13:29] man
    I agree! We all did it!
[13:31] man
    We swallowed our pride.
[13:32] waku
    Kyotaro-kun, I don't think you have a choice.
[13:36] dogo
    Go on, roll the die already!
[13:39] man
    Do it!
[13:40] shu
    Fine, I'll do it.
[13:42] shu
    If I do it, you'll leave me alone,
    right? Fine, fine.
[13:44] kar
    He's gonna do it!
[13:45] kar
    Great!
[13:47] kar
    Let's all roll the die happily!
[13:48] kar
    What'll we roll? What'll we roll?
[13:51] kar
    Nya-nya-nya-nyan!
SIGN    Hey, Bastards, Get Over Here! The All-Men Heart-Racing Dice Party Plaza
[13:53] shu
    There.
[13:55] shu
    Go.
[13:56] dogo
    Okay, let's read it!
[13:59] dogo
    Right now, I will princess-carry
     the person to my left!
[14:04] dogo
    Then he'll feed me!
[14:06] dogo
    This is incredible!
[14:08] man
    And then the person you
    carry needs to feed you!
[14:11] man
    It's perfect!
[14:13] kiri
    W-Wait a minute!
[14:15] kiri
    The person to your left would be...
[14:17] waku
    It's clearly you, Ryoma-kun.
[14:20] waku
    No, no, no...
[14:21] dogo
    Don't you run away, Ryoma-senpai!
[14:23] man
    You think we'll allow it?!
[14:25] kiri
    Hey. You guys are looking really serious...
[14:28] man
    You bet we are.
[14:30] dogo
    After humiliating us like that yesterday,
[14:32] dogo
    you really think we'll let you walk away?
[14:35] man
    Precisely.
[14:38] shu
    I guess I must.
[14:39] kiri
    Why do you have to drag me into it?!
[14:42] shu
    It's not my fault you were
    next to me, Ryo-chin.
[14:45] kiri
    But we're picking up an audience...
[14:48] all
    Hey, I think they're about to do something!
[14:51] all
    Shuzenji is gonna princess-carry Kirishima
    and get him to feed him, apparently.
[14:55] all
    The Defense Club is so stupid!
[14:59] shu
    Ryo-chin.
[15:01] kiri
    Let's get this over with.
[15:03] kiri
    Eek!
[15:04] man
    Wow, he just said "eek!"
[15:06] man
    Yeah, he said "eek."
[15:08] man
    Why "eek"?
[15:09] man
    B-Because you swept me up so suddenly...
[15:15] shu
    Do you know what needs to happen after this?
[15:17] shu
    Y-Yeah.
[15:19] shu
    You need to feed me while I'm carrying you.
[15:24] shu
    Chiro.
[15:24] dogo
    Coming, coming!
[15:25] dogo
    The cake to be fed.
[15:31] kiri
    W-Well... Here I go...
[15:34] shu
    Ready when you are.
[15:36] boy
    Hey, hey, he's doing it!
[15:40] kiri
    Okay. Say ahh.
[15:42] shu
    Ahh.
[15:48] shu
    It's delicious, Ryo-chin.
[15:52] boy
    Amazing! He did it!
[15:54] boy
    Those two are nuts!
[15:59] boy
    Great job, Defense Club!
[16:01] boy
    I love it!
[16:02] boy
    Do more!
[16:05] ata
    Enjoy your celebrations while you can.
[16:08] una
    Nice one!
[16:10] shira
    I'm blushing!
[16:11] dogo
    Wow, wow! So embarrassing...
[16:14] man
    We may have pushed them too far.
[16:16] waku
    But the audience seems to be enjoying it...
[16:19] dogo
    Well, Kyotaro-senpai and
    Ryoma-senpai are really close,
[16:23] dogo
    so maybe it's okay?
[16:24] mon
    What... what is this feeling of unity?
[16:28] mon
    Dice are supposed to exist simply as a
    tool to help you decide what to do.
[16:33] mon
    To think they could be used to gather
    such attention, to bring such happiness...
[16:37] ata
    Why are you acting impressed?
[16:43] ata
    What's that?
[16:45] ata
    A new cosplay?
[16:46] ata
    Cool!
[16:48] ata
    You hate them, don't you?
[16:50] ata
    That's why you became a monster, isn't it?
[16:52] ata
    Dice Monster!
[16:56] kiri
    Wait, you're a monster?
[16:58] shu
    For real? I had no idea.
[17:01] shu
    But if you're a monster,
    why didn't you attack?
[17:04] mon
    W-Well...
[17:06] mon
    O-Obviously, at the start of this,
     I intended to bring the hammer of judgment
[17:10] mon
    down upon you for your unscrupulous
     use of dice and your distracting activities...
[17:15] mon
    But for some reason, I got drawn in...
[17:18] mon
    The idea of using a die like that
    to make so many people happy...
[17:24] mon
    it was exhilarating!
[17:28] waku
    Exhilarating?
[17:30] waku
    Why didn't you just join in, then?
[17:33] waku
    We could have all enjoyed it together.
[17:37] mon
    W-We could all enjoy it together?
[17:39] shu
    Yeah, we could have had fun together.
[17:42] mon
    I see... So dice can be
    used like that, too...
[17:47] shu
    You really wanted to enjoy
     the cultural festival from the start, didn't you?
[17:52] ata
    This is nonsense!
[17:53] ata
    Don't let them distract you!
[17:55] ata
    Fight!
[17:56] ata
    Are you a monster or aren't you?
[17:58] mon
    B-But...
[17:59] ata
    Bring your hammer of anger down upon them!
[18:03] kar
    Everyone! You gotta save the monster!
[18:06] kar
    He doesn't want to fight!
[18:08] kar
    Make him happy at once!
[18:10] shu
    That's right.
[18:11] shu
    I don't want to fight
    against Dice-kun, either.
[18:14] shu
    Yeah.
[18:15] shu
    That's right!
[18:16] shu
    Okay!
[18:17] kar
    In that case...
[18:19] kar
    My magic knights of happiness, come on!
[18:31] kar
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[19:07] kar
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[19:22] kar
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[19:35] kar
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[19:48] kar
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[20:01] kar
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[20:06] kar
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[20:08] kar
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[20:11] kar
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[20:13] kar
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[20:16] kar
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[20:18] kar
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[20:22] kar
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[20:26] kar
    Knights contract complete!
[20:31] shu
    Dice-kun, let's play dice games together.
[20:34] shu
    It'll be fun.
[20:36] kiri
    Though it can be embarrassing...
[20:38] waku
    Watching friends embarrass themselves
    is the most fun a person can have.
[20:43] waku
    Wakura-senpai... you really are a sadist.
[20:46] karu
    Okay, everyone.
[20:47] karu
    Let's make him happy!
[20:49] karu
    With that again?
[20:50] karu
    Of course!
[20:52] karu
    Okay, go!
[20:54] karu
    Now! Use your powers
    combined to make him happy!
[20:57] karu
    Are you happy?
[20:59] karu
    Yes!
[20:59] karu
    Are you happy?
[21:00] karu
    Yes!
[21:01] karu
    Are you happy?
[21:02] karu
    Yes!
[21:02] karu
    Are you happy?
[21:03] karu
    Yes!
[21:04] karu
    Are you happy?
[21:05] karu
    Yes!
[21:05] karu
    Let's happy hour!
[21:09] karu
    Happy and Set!
[21:22] karu
    Return to happiness!
[21:25] karu
    Happy and Turn!
[21:36] dice
    Feels like I'm on a roll...
[21:43] dice
    Happy End!
[21:45] dice
    Happy Powder!
[21:51] sai
    What have I been...?
[21:53] waku
    So the dice monster was Sai Goro-kun, huh?
[21:56] shu
    Now, let's roll the dice together.
[21:59] shu
    Okay!
[22:05] ata
    "Happy end," my eye.
[22:07] ata
    There are no such things as happy ends!
[22:11] una
    Ata!
[22:12] shira
    Ibusuki-senpai, wait up!
SIGN    HAPPY Old Men
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    Next time: Let's happy kiss our way to "HAPPY Old Men."
SIGN    Shuzenji Kyotaro's dream is to be able to space out forever.
SIGN    At last, he'll have his dream! Ah, I wish I could space out! (I mean it)

Season 4

10 - HAPPY Old Men

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:15] ibu
    K-Kyo-chan!
SIGN    HAPPY Old Men
[02:10] dogo
    Hooray!
[02:11] dogo
    First bath of the day!
[02:13] dogo
    Happy!
[02:15] waku
    It happens every day,
[02:16] waku
    but I think it's lovely that Ichiro-kun gets
     just as delighted about it each time.
[02:23] man
    He's a bit of a simpleton,
    but I kind of envy him.
[02:27] kiri
    Yeah.
[02:29] kiri
    Being able to enjoy the same
    thing over and over is nice.
[02:32] kiri
    Kyotaro is the same way, really.
[02:34] man
    He enjoys things?
[02:37] man
    By the way, where is Shuzenji-senpai?
[02:39] kiri
    Oh?
[02:40] man
    I was sure he came in before us...
[02:43] waku
    You think that might be him?
[02:46] dogo
    This is heaven!
[02:48] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[02:51] kiri
    Wake up! Open your eyes!
[02:54] dogo
    This is terrible!
[02:55] man
    I think he might need
    mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
[03:08] shu
    Achoo!
[03:11] dogo
    Did you sneeze in the bath?
[03:12] dogo
    You're not cold, are you?
[03:14] man
    That's your first comment?
[03:17] wak
    Shouldn't you be happy he's breathing?
[03:20] dogo
    Oh, yeah! That's right!
[03:22] dogo
    I'm so glad you're alive, Kyotaro-senpai!
[03:26] shu
    Was I sleeping in the bath again?
[03:30] kiri
    At the bottom of the bath!
[03:32] kiri
    That was a close call! I guess we can't
    let you in the bath by yourself...
[03:35] wak
    I can't believe you're a high-school
    student who needs a caretaker.
[03:38] dogo
    Ryoma-senpai, you need to
    be more attentive to him!
[03:41] kiri
    It's my fault?
[03:43] man
    Why are you constantly napping, anyway?
[03:46] waku
    Because it feels good, I assume...
[03:49] shu
    That's part of it, but...
    I think I like dreaming.
[03:54] kiri
    Escaping from reality?
[03:55] shu
    I don't think that's it.
[03:58] shu
    I like it when I'm dreaming, but I never
    really remember what I was dreaming about.
[04:03] shu
    I feel like it's something important...
[04:06] shu
    but I don't know what it is.
[04:08] dogo
    He's as forgetful as an old man.
[04:11] kiri
    He's always been this way.
    I'm used to it by now.
[04:14] man
    By the way,
[04:16] man
    did you know that the first bath of the
    day is the most dangerous one for seniors?
[04:20] man
    No one's around yet, so the room isn't warmed up,
    which lowers their body temperature.
[04:25] man
    However, the bathwater itself is all the
    hotter for having no one in it yet.
[04:30] man
    The change in temperature puts a strain
    on the body, particularly the heart.
[04:33] dogo
    What?! Then we'd better not
    let Kyotaro-senpai in first!
[04:37] dogo
    Strain on the heart sounds really bad!
[04:40] kiri
    That only matters if Kyotaro
    is an old man, though.
[04:44] waku
    Talking to Kyotaro-kun does sometimes
    feel like talking to a much older person.
[04:50] man
    I agree.
[04:51] dogo
    So do I.
[04:52] kiri
    I've been around him so long,
     I guess I'm kind of numb to it.
[04:56] shu
    But if I have to die,
    I'd like to die in a hot bath.
[05:00] shu
    It's so warm. Feels so good.
[05:03] shu
    I feel like I could just slip away...
[05:06] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai!
[05:07] dogo
    We're back to square one!
[05:13] shu
    Did I fall asleep again?
[05:15] kiri
    Yeah, you did.
[05:17] kiri
    Ryoma-kun, maybe you should give some
    thought to being Kyotaro-kun's 24-hour caretaker.
[05:23] kiri
    I'm starting to think you're right.
[05:25] dogo
    So you'll be roommates after
    you graduate high school, huh?
[05:28] man
    Given the active risk to
    Shuzenji-senpai's life,
[05:32] man
    I agree that a roommate
    situation might be best.
[05:34] kiri
    W-Well, I don't know about
    that exact arrangement...
[05:38] kiri
    I certainly won't abandon him, though.
[05:40] waku
    In other words, you'll be caring
    for him your whole life.
[05:43] kiri
    Why would you say that?!
[05:45] kiri
    What is it?
[05:46] shu
    The truth is, I...
[05:50] shu
    I wasn't first in the bath.
[05:56] kiri
    So what?
[05:57] shu
    I'm just saying, Karls was
    the first one in the bath.
[06:02] waku
    We're not taking about who was
    first in the bath anymore.
[06:06] dogo
    He's so far behind, it's kind of amazing.
[06:08] man
    Shuzenji-senpai's old mannishness
    really is exceptional.
[06:13] waku
    Well, I can't say he wouldn't fit
    right in with a group of seniors...
[06:22] shu
    What a pleasant bath.
[06:24] kiri
    He really would fit in at an old folks' home.
[06:28] kar
    Happy, happy!
[06:35] dogo
    Huh? That's odd...
[06:38] dogo
    Why am I so tired?
[06:40] dogo
    I feel like I've aged sixty years in a day.
[06:44] man
    That's not possi—
[06:47] man
    You're old!
[06:48] dogo
    You're an old man too, Taishi!
[06:51] kiri
    What's all the yelling about?
[06:54] dogo
    What's going on?
[06:56] kiri
    Wait! Look at that!
[06:58] kiri
    It's not just us!
[07:01] dogo
    Is this because we were calling
    Kyotaro-senpai an old man yesterday?
[07:05] dogo
    Some kind of curse?
[07:06] man
    You think Shuzenji-senpai got
    mad and put a curse on us?
[07:11] kiri
    No way! Kyotaro doesn't
    have the power to do that.
[07:15] waku
    Even if he doesn't have
    the power to curse people,
[07:17] waku
    he does seem to have the
    power to get wishes granted.
[07:22] shu
    That's right.
[07:23] shu
    Last night, I might have wished that
    instead of going to school every day,
[07:28] shu
    I could just space out as an old man.
[07:30] kiri
    So you did wish it?!
[07:31] man
    What are you going to do
    about this, Shuzenji-senpai?
[07:34] shu
    What, you aren't happy about it?
[07:36] dogo
    Of course we aren't!
[07:38] waku
    Ryoma-kun, it looks like you'll have
    to take care of all of us from now on.
[07:42] kiri
    Come on, I'm just as old
    as the rest of you...
[07:47] kiri
    But why did we suddenly get so old?
[07:52] mon
    They're aging at a nice pace!
[07:55] mon
    Now, go on, keep aging!
[08:02] kiri
    It's odd. I feel like...
    I'm getting even older...
[08:07] man
    We need to find the cause,
    or we'll be in trouble.
[08:11] waku
    It's true. Any older and it'll just
    ruin my character design.
[08:17] shu
    Too much trouble.
[08:18] kiri
    What, you don't mind the
    thought of getting older?
[08:22] shu
    Well, we could skip class
    and no one would get mad.
[08:26] shu
    I think I'm okay staying like this.
[08:28] kiri
    That's your reasoning?
[08:29] dogo
    I see! If you're an old man,
    you don't have to go to class!
[08:34] man
    I'd rather not sacrifice my youth
    just to get out of class, though...
[08:38] mas
    Wow, aging like that would really stink.
[08:42] mas
    I hope I stay beautiful as I age!
[08:45] dogo
    Oh, Martha!
[08:47] una
    My, they've aged even more
    than I was expecting.
[08:52] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro... it suits you.
[08:55] shu
    Huh? What does?
[08:58] ata
    I'm saying it suits your laziness.
[09:01] shu
    Yeah, I agree!
[09:05] waka
    If they're here, that seems to suggest...
[09:08] waka
    The cause of all this...
[09:09] kiri
    Yeah, it's that thing, right?
[09:12] kiri
    A m... m... mo... What was it again?
[09:16] dogo
    Ryoma-senpai, what's wrong with your memory?
[09:20] dogo
    You know what it is. A... m...
    m... m... What was it again?
[09:27] man
    Not you, too!
[09:28] man
    It's the usual thing! A m... m... m...
[09:34] shu
    Meat curry.
[09:36] waku
    Meat curry? Was that what
    we were talking about?
[09:40] waku
    I think I'd like to eat some meat curry.
[09:42] waku
    I think I had some meat curry this morning.
[09:44] man
    Now that you mention it,
    I think you did, Ichiro.
[09:50] mon
    Go on, keep aging!
[09:55] dogo
    I feel kind of tired...
[10:00] man
    You're a total old man!
[10:03] dogo
    What's that?
[10:05] man
    You've become even more of an old man!
[10:10] dogo
    What's that?
[10:13] dogo
    You've! Become! An old man!
[10:17] dogo
    Oh, shucks, have I?
[10:19] man
    It wasn't a compliment!
[10:21] kiri
    This is terrible! We just
    keep on getting older.
[10:25] shu
    What's the big deal?
    It's not that different from how we were.
[10:30] kiri
    But it is different!
[10:32] waku
    But Kyotaro-kun's way of speaking
    hasn't changed much, I'll admit...
[10:37] kiri
    I can't believe it.
[10:38] waku
    Maybe because he was the most
    like an old man from the start?
[10:43] kiri
    For better or worse... I'm not sure which.
[10:45] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai...
[10:48] dogo
    You've changed so much!
[10:50] shu
    Chiro, that's a tree.
[10:53] man
    Honestly.
[10:54] man
    You've always been a fool,
[10:56] man
    but you've gotten even worse
    in your old age, Ichiro.
[10:59] shu
    Tai-Tai, that's a stairway.
[11:03] mon
    Well? You can't fight back in
    bodies like those, can you?
[11:07] waku
    I see something...
    but it's too far away to make out.
[11:11] waku
    It looks a bit like a head.
[11:15] man
    That's my head.
[11:19] kar
    He's currently in the depths
    of anger and suffering!
[11:23] kar
    We need to make him happy!
[11:27] waku
    That's right. What's causing this again?
[11:30] kiri
    You know, the m... m... thing.
[11:34] dogo
    The thing, you know. The... m... m...
[11:38] man
    The usual thing. The m... m...
     What was it again?
[11:44] shu
    Meat curry.
[11:46] kiri
    Of course! Meat curry!
[11:48] wak
    Is that what we were talking about?
[11:51] dogo
    That reminds me,
    I had meat curry this morning!
[11:55] man
    That's right. I think you did, Ichiro.
[11:59] shu
    Everyone, you're repeating
    the same things as before.
[12:03] kiri
    The same things?
[12:04] kiri
    That's right... we were talking about
    how you haven't changed much, Kyotaro.
[12:10] shu
    Yeah, we've been through that, too.
[12:12] kiri
    Is it possible... you haven't changed
    because you were an old man already?
[12:17] shu
    Nanao-san, you said all that before, too.
[12:21] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai, you've gotten so hard...
[12:25] shu
    Chiro, that's a wall.
[12:27] man
    I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
[12:30] shu
    Tai-Tai, that's a stairway.
[12:34] shu
    What a pain...
[12:38] kar
    What's he doing?
[12:41] kiri
    I don't wanna get any older!
[12:41] shi
    Second childhood, I think.
[12:44] kar
    What about him, then?
[12:46] man
    I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
[12:50] shu
    Bragging about his old days as a bad boy.
[12:53] kar
    And what's with him?
[12:55] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai...
[12:57] dogo
    You've gotten so round...
[12:59] shu
    Suffering the vision loss
    that comes with age, I think.
[13:03] waku
    I get such a chill at this time of year!
[13:06] waku
    I always keep Chinese medicine
    on hand for my aching joints.
[13:12] karu
    And him?
[13:12] shu
    Boasting about his health conditions.
    It's common in seniors.
[13:16] kar
    Aging is pretty rough on you humans, I guess.
[13:19] una
    It's a little hard to watch, really...
[13:22] mar
    Can we put a stop to this?
[13:23] mar
    They're so ugly it's making
    my adorable eyes ache.
[13:26] ata
    Shut up for a minute.
[13:30] ata
    Why isn't he suffering?
[13:32] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro...
[13:34] ata
    You need... to suffer!
SIGN    Furanui Born March 26 Blood Type: O? Aries Hobbies: Collecting insects Likes: Strawberries, digging
[13:45] dogo
    I feel kinda tired...
[13:48] man
    You're a total old man!
[13:51] dogo
    Eh? What was that?
[13:52] man
    You're! An! Old man!
[13:56] dogo
    Oh, shucks, am I?
[13:57] man
    It wasn't a compliment!
[13:59] kiri
    This is awful!
[14:01] kiri
    We just keep aging!
[14:05] waku
    The season's so chilly, isn't it?
[14:11] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai, you've gotten so square!
[14:15] man
    I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
[14:19] kiri
    No! No! I don't wanna get any older!
[14:24] mon
    Notice me already, darn it!
[14:27] mon
    It's me!
[14:29] mon
    I'm the one who made you age!
[14:31] mon
    Fight me already!
[14:35] kar
    We're not getting anywhere like this.
[14:37] kar
    I guess you'd better transform.
[14:40] kar
    As Prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
[14:43] kar
    Become Karls Knights Happy Kiss
    and save the people!
[14:53] kar
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[15:04] kar
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[15:08] kar
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[15:12] kar
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[15:16] kar
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[15:20] kar
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[15:24] kar
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[15:27] kar
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[15:30] kar
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[15:33] kar
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[15:37] kar
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[15:40] kar
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[15:45] kar
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[15:51] kiri
    We transformed?
[15:53] waku
    So we can transform in this state, too...
[15:56] dogo
    I guess we just have to
    beat the monster, then.
[16:00] man
    Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
[16:03] mon
    What are they actually saying?
[16:07] shu
    They've got kind of a
     "let's beat him already" vibe going.
[16:12] mon
    So they finally want to fight!
[16:15] mon
    Now, feel my wrath!
[16:22] kiri
    Huh?
[16:23] waku
    No change at all.
[16:25] dogo
    I guess we just gotta beat the monster!
[16:28] man
    Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
[16:31] shu
    Sounds like they're feeling pretty okay.
[16:37] mon
    I see! My attacks don't work
    because they're already old!
[16:41] shira
    He's so useless...
[16:49] mon
    Well?
[16:51] mon
    Being old feels awful, doesn't it?
[16:54] kiri
    It does.
[16:55] kiri
    It doesn't feel good at all.
[16:57] kiri
    We gotta beat the monster as soon as we can!
[17:01] man
    Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
[17:04] shu
    They're kind of saying, "Are you so sure?"
[17:07] mon
    I don't think that's what
    they were saying at all!
[17:10] shu
    But are you so sure?
[17:12] shu
    I don't mind being an old
    man at all, personally...
[17:15] mon
    You couldn't understand...
[17:18] mon
    I'm in high school, but I have
    a face like an old man...
[17:22] mon
    so everybody just calls me "Old Man"!
    You couldn't possibly understand my pain!
[17:26] mon
    So...
[17:27] mon
    I'm making everyone older than me,
[17:29] mon
    so they can get a taste of how I feel!
[17:33] shu
    Personally, I couldn't
    wait to become an old man.
[17:39] shu
    I wanted to get accustomed to things like
    basking in the sun as soon as possible.
[17:44] shu
    There are lots of things that don't look
    "right" on you until you get older.
[17:49] shu
    I'm already used to those
    things, so it's fine.
[17:53] kar
    Now, everyone!
[17:55] kar
    Kyotaro, hurry!
[17:57] kar
    Kyotaro-kun, it's time!
[18:00] kar
    Kyotaro-senpai, hurry!
[18:02] kar
    Please hurry!
[18:05] kar
    Darn it...
[18:08] kar
    Now! Use your powers
    combined to make him happy!
[18:11] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:13] kar
    Yes!
[18:15] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:17] kar
    Yes!
[18:18] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:20] kar
    Yes!
[18:21] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:23] kar
    Yes!
[18:25] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:27] kar
    Yes!
[18:28] kar
    Let's happy hour!
[18:31] kar
    Return to happiness!
[18:34] kar
    Happy...
[18:52] kar
    ...and Turn!
[19:00] mon
    Oh, it came out. It's all out.
[19:07] shu
    Happy End.
[19:09] kar
    Happy Powder!
[19:15] kiri
    Hey, we're back!
[19:16] dogo
    We are!
[19:17] dogo
    Does that mean we have to go to class?
[19:20] dogo
    You'd really rather go
    back to being that way?
[19:24] waku
    Either way, it's a little
    too soon for us to be old.
[19:28] shu
    Oh? Who are you again?
[19:31] kiri
    That's Ojii Santa from our class, remember?
[19:34] shu
    Oh, "Old Man."
SIGN     Ojii Santa
[19:37] oji
    I see. Being an old man means
    I'm ahead of the curve.
[19:42] oji
    I guess I have some things others don't.
[19:45] oji
    Thanks.
[19:47] oji
    Old man, old man...
[19:50] shu
    Lucky. I wanted to be able
    to space out all day.
[19:54] kiri
    You'll get there. Don't worry.
[19:56] waku
    But you can rest easy.
[19:58] waku
    It sounds like Ryoma-kun will
    take care of you forever.
[20:01] kiri
    I didn't say that!
[20:03] shu
    Well, we worked up a sweat,
    so let's take a bath.
[20:12] una
    W-Well, nothing to be done about it.
[20:14] una
    Let's just try again next time.
[20:16] masa
    T-That's right!
[20:18] masa
    We can make as many monsters as we want.
[20:21] una
    Ata...
[20:23] shu
    So tired. I really want that bath...
[20:26] shu
    Oh, that's right.
[20:32] shu
    Ata!
[20:34] shu
    Why don't you come to the bath with us?
[20:37] ata
    Damn you...
[20:40] ata
    Why... are you saying that... after all this?
[20:45] shu
    What? What's wrong?
[20:50] ata
    Kyo-chan!
[20:55] ata
    You really are...
[20:58] ata
    This is what you always do... Always...
[21:02] ata
    You just drift through life,
    doing what you feel like...
[21:05] ata
    Doing whatever you want...
[21:07] ata
    You never even think about
    how anyone else feels!
[21:13] ata
    You're just going to throw that out there?
    "Come to the bath"?
[21:16] ata
    Like I'm an afterthought?
    It's so inconsiderate!
[21:22] una
    Ata...
[21:23] fura
    I understand your dissatisfaction and anger.
[21:27] fura
    Spread fear! Rise, Black Knight!
[21:36] una
    It can't be!
[21:44] una
    Ata?
[21:45] una
    Ibusuki-senpai?
[21:53] shu
    Oh? Ata?
[21:57] shu
    Ata-kun... became a monster?
[22:04] waku
    He's putting out a dangerous aura...
[22:07] karu
    This isn't good!
[22:09] karu
    He's putting out incredibly unhappy energy!
SIGN    One Centimeter to HAPPY
SIGN    Next Episode
[23:54] sign
    Next time: Let's happy kiss
    our way to One Centimeter to HAPPY!
SIGN    Wow, Ata-san, you're so mad. Seriously, what happened in your past?
SIGN    Time for the classic Defense Club second-to-last-episode chaos! Will production get it out in time?! (That's what you meant?!)

Season 4

11 - One Centimeter to HAPPY

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:09] ---
    So tired. I really want that bath...
[00:12] ---
    Oh, that's right.
[00:17] ---
    Ata!
[00:19] ---
    Why don't you come to the bath with us?
[00:23] ---
    Damn you...
[00:25] ---
    Why... are you saying that... after all this?
[00:30] ---
    What? What's wrong?
[00:34] ---
    You're just going to throw that out there?
    "Come to the bath"?
[00:37] ---
    Like I'm an afterthought?
    It's so inconsiderate!
[00:40] ---
    I understand your dissatisfaction and anger.
[00:44] ---
    Spread fear! Rise, Black Knight!
[00:53] ---
    It can't be!
[01:12] ---
    This isn't good!
[01:14] ---
    He's putting out incredibly unhappy energy!
SIGN    One Centimeter to HAPPY
[03:07] kiri
    Ata-kun?
[03:08] waku
    He's become a monster?
[03:09] man
    It appears so...
[03:11] dogo
    This is so bad!
[03:13] shu
    Hey, hey. You're kidding, right?
[03:22] shira
    I don't... think it's a joke.
[03:25] una
    You turned Ata into a monster?!
[03:30] fura
    To rule this world requires fear.
[03:33] fura
    Fear and suffering are the most effective
[03:36] fura
    and efficient ways to control humans.
[03:39] fura
    Ritter Diamant has sublimated his own
     suffering and become fear itself.
[03:46] fura
    So that I, Furanui,
    may control the human world!
[03:50] fura
    Shall I turn you to fear, too?
[03:52] fura
    Ritter Amethyst...
[03:54] fura
    the warped hatred behind
    that pretty face of yours.
[03:58] fura
    Ritter Rosenquarz...
[03:59] fura
    the despair hidden behind your smile
    that comes from not being understood?
[04:03] una
    How do you know about that?
[04:05] fura
    And I, as ruler of the human world,
    shall become Honyala Land's king!
[04:10] kar
    You're wrong, Furanui!
[04:12] kar
    You can bind people with fear,
    but that's not real leadership!
[04:16] kar
    Not unless they're happy!
[04:18] kar
    Countries are founded
     on the happiness of their people!
[04:21] kar
    Happiness is indispensable
    to ruling the human world!
[04:25] fura
    Silence! Happiness is the
    opiate of the masses!
[04:29] fura
    Go, Ritter Diamant! Spread fear!
[04:34] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro... I will make you pay!
[04:38] shu
    Me?
[04:42] shu
    Stop it, Ata.
[04:44] shu
    What's going on here?
[04:46] kiri
    Wait... has Ata-kun been mad
    about that this whole time?
[04:49] shu
    Hey, Ata. Did I do something to you?
[04:52] ata
    Shut up!
[04:54] kiri
    Look out!
[04:56] ata
    Don't get in my way, Kirishima!
[04:59] fura
    Yes, get him!
[05:01] fura
    Edelstein, hit them with all of your
[05:04] fura
    deep-seated sorrows and resentments!
[05:08] una
    Could you not order us around?
[05:10] hone
    Yeah, taking orders is the
    least cute thing there is.
[05:15] una
    We're doing this of our own free will.
[05:26] waku
    He's in a rather pissy mood, isn't he?
[05:27] man
    This is no time for flippancy!
[05:32] una
    Stay away from Ata...
[05:33] una
    ...or we'll stop you ourselves!
[05:35] man
    You wanna fight? Bring it on!
[05:40] una
    Well, if it isn't the former delinquent,
    Manza Taishi-kun.
[05:45] man
    How do you know about that?
[05:46] una
    Everyone knows it.
[05:48] una
    Maybe you belong with us, not them?
[05:52] man
    Shut up!
[05:54] dogo
    Taishi!
[05:55] shira
    Not so fast.
[05:57] shira
    You'll have to beat me first!
[05:59] dogo
    Don't get in my way, Magozaemon!
[06:03] dogo
    Shoot, I shouldn't have said that...
[06:05] dogo
    Sorry, sorry.
[06:06] shira
    You get the heck away from me!
[06:11] shira
    Idiot! This is why you never cross me!
[06:14] man
    Hey, you! Don't fight your own cousin!
[06:18] shira
    M-My perfect hair!
[06:23] waku
    I don't think I understand what this fight
    is all about, Ritter Rosenquarz-san.
[06:29] una
    Yes. I guess it's just time to fight,
    Luna Kiss-san.
[06:36] kiri
    Kyotaro, what are you doing?
[06:38] shu
    I'm tired.
[06:39] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[06:44] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro. Why won't you fight?
[06:47] shu
    Because it's annoying.
[06:50] ata
    Annoying?
[06:53] shu
    And I'm sleepy.
[06:57] shu
    And I don't want to fight you.
[07:00] shu
    We have no reason to fight.
[07:02] kiri
    Wait, Kyotaro!
[07:07] ata
    No reason, you say?
[07:12] una
    Ata?
[07:13] una
    Ibusuki-senpai?
[07:15] kiri
    Ata-kun?
[07:17] ata
    You still don't understand?!
[07:31] kar
    Everyone!
[07:32] kar
    Wake up, everyone!
[07:34] kar
    This isn't happy at all!
[07:38] fura
    What's wrong, Karls? Is that all
    your "happy" power has to offer?
[07:44] fura
    It seems that fear truly
    is the stronger force!
[07:49] kiri
    Not yet!
[07:51] kiri
    We haven't lost yet!
[07:53] waku
    That's right!
[07:54] man
    The idea that fear wins over happiness...
[07:57] dogo
    ...we won't support it!
[08:00] kar
    Guys...
[08:04] shu
    What a nice nap.
[08:06] shu
    We won't lose.
[08:08] shu
    Because we believe in Karls,
    and the power of happiness.
[08:11] kar
    Guys!
[08:13] kar
    Furanui! We'll stand up again and again!
[08:17] kar
    Because we believe in the power of happiness!
[08:21] kar
    We'll transform as
    many times as we need to!
[08:23] kar
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss...
    my magic knights of happiness!
[08:27] kar
    Come on!
[08:38] kar
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[09:15] kar
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[09:29] kar
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[09:42] kar
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[09:55] kar
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[10:08] kar
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[10:13] kar
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[10:16] kar
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[10:18] kar
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[10:21] kar
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[10:23] kar
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[10:26] kar
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[10:29] kar
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[10:34] kar
    Knights contract complete!
[10:36] kar
    Now! Use your powers
    combined to make him happy!
[10:40] kar
    Are you happy?
[10:41] kar
    Yes!
[10:41] kar
    Are you happy?
[10:42] kar
    Yes!
[10:43] kar
    Are you happy?
[10:44] kar
    Yes!
[10:44] kar
    Are you happy?
[10:45] kar
    Yes!
[10:46] kar
    Are you happy?
[10:47] kar
    Yes!
[10:48] kar
    Let's happy hour!
[10:51] kar
    Happy and Set!
[11:04] kar
    Return to happiness!
[11:07] kar
    Happy and Turn!
[11:15] ata
    You can't make people happy with magic!
[11:27] kar
    No...
[11:34] ata
    No reason? You still don't get it, do you?
[11:39] shu
    Yeah...
[11:40] ata
    You're always mocking me like this...
[11:43] ata
    And you're always cruising through life,
    never putting in any effort...
[11:48] ata
    It has happened time and time and time again!
SIGN    Binan
    Elementary
    School
SIGN    (Bronze) Hayashi Masaki (Bronze) Yamanaka Kazuki (Silver) Ibusuki Ata (Gold) Shuzenji Kyotaro
[12:08] (Flashback) kid
    Shuzenji's amazing, huh?
[12:09] (Flashback) kid
    Yeah, he's so great.
[12:11] (Flashback) kiri
    Aw... I worked hard on mine,
     but Kyotaro got the gold again.
[12:18] (Flashback) kyo
    I think Ata's is way better
    than mine, though...
[12:33] (Flashback) kiri
    Sheesh, Kyotaro.
[12:35] (Flashback) kiri
    I only just managed to clear five blocks.
[12:58] (Flashback) kids
    Congratulations! Amazing!
[13:03] (Flashback) shu
    Huh? I jumped it!
[13:11] (Flashback) kids
    Wow! Cool!
[13:12] (Flashback) kiri
    Wow, a new trick! You're so cool, Kyotaro!
[13:28] ibu
    That time and that time and that time...
[13:31] ibu
    Everything I worked hard to achieve...
[13:33] ibu
    Every time, every time, every time...
[13:36] ibu
    Again and again and again...
[13:42] kar
    He's been caught up in a maelstrom of hatred!
[13:46] kar
    I've never seen such a twisted, unhappy aura!
[13:50] dogo
    Just over that stuff?
[13:52] man
    He's just venting every offense
     he's kept locked up inside this whole time.
[13:57] waku
    It just shows how powerful his feelings are.
[14:01] waku
    Or his obsession, you could say...
[14:05] waku
    Or...
[14:06] ata
    And then...
[14:08] ata
    That time, too!
[14:13] kiri
    You know, Kyotaro. That time.
[14:16] shu
    That time? What time?
[14:18] kiri
    That day after we were playing in the mud.
[14:22] kiri
    Remember?
[14:24] ata
    Did that really mean so little to you?
[14:26] ata
    That time...
[14:29] (Flashback) ata
    This is fun!
[14:35] (Flashback) kiri
    Look, I'm so dirty!
[14:37] (Flashback) shu
    Ata, you're the dirtiest!
[14:40] (Flashback) ata
    You are, Kyo-chan!
[14:42] (Flashback) kiri
    But our moms'll be mad
     if we come back all dirty.
[14:50] (Flashback) yu
    Hey, kids! You're looking pretty muddy there!
[14:53] (Flashback) yu
    Why not come by our bath to wash off?
[14:57] (Flashback) yu
    My bro always says kids gotta get muddy.
[15:00] (Flashback) yu
    Muddy kids forever!
[15:02] (Flashback) yu
    Yeah, yeah!
[15:05] (Flashback) shu
    Yeah! Let's go to the bath!
[15:07] (Flashback) kiri
    Okay!
[15:10] (Flashback) ata
    I'm coming too!
[15:14] ---
    Undress and let's get in there!
[15:16] ---
    Bath time!
[15:17] (Flashback) ata
    Um, I've never done this before...
[15:17] kiri
    My mom would have been so mad...
[15:20] (Flashback) ata
    So...
[15:20] kyo
    We almost finished that castle, too!
[15:33] ata
    You... You...
[15:35] ata
    You left me behind!
[15:43] dogo
    Is it really that big a deal?
[15:45] shira
    Shut up!
[15:47] ata
    I really wanted you to realize it.
[15:51] ata
    But you didn't just fail realize...
[15:53] ata
    You kept rubbing it in my face!
[15:57] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro.
[15:59] ata
    I am going to surpass you!
[16:02] ata
    Take this!
[16:06] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[16:08] dogo
    Why?
[16:20] ata
    Why? Why won't you fight back?
[16:25] ata
    Are you going to ignore me
     the way you always do?
[16:49] ata
    Why? Why can't I make you respond?
[16:51] kiri
    Ata-kun! You've got the wrong idea!
[16:54] ata
    Why?!
[16:56] shu
    I just wanted to bear the brunt
[17:00] shu
    of your feelings as best I could.
[17:05] shu
    Because that's all I can do at this point.
[17:12] shu
    But... I did search for you then.
[17:21] (Flashback) kiri
    What nice hot water!
[17:23] (Flashback) shu
    Ata! I'll wash your back!
[17:29] (Flashback) shu
    Ata?
[17:31] (Flashback) shu
    Ata?
[17:33] (Flashback) shu
    Ata?
[17:34] (Flashback) kiri
    Where are you?
SIGN    Binan Elementary School
[17:41] (Flashback) shu
    Ata!
[17:43] (Flashback) shu
    Ata-kun!
[17:44] (Flashback) shu
    Where'd you go yesterday?
    You just disappeared...
[17:47] (Flashback) shu
    We were looking for you.
[17:51] (Flashback) ata
    Forget it.
[17:57] (Flashback) kiri
    Ata-kun!
[17:59] (Flashback) shu
    What's wrong with Ata?
[18:04] shu
    I should have asked earlier,
    but what did you do after the bath?
[18:08] ata
    I spent the day alone,
[18:13] ata
    crying in the park.
[18:16] ata
    Back then, I wanted you to say it...
[18:20] ata
    "Ata, come to the bath with us."
[18:22] ata
    All this time, I wanted that... and yet...
[18:27] ata
    Instead, at the worst possible time...
[18:30] (Flashback) ata
    Oh, that's right.
[18:35] (Flashback) ata
    Ata!
[18:37] (Flashback) ata
    Why don't you come to the bath with us?
[18:40] ata
    Those words I've wanted
    to hear for over ten years...
[18:45] ata
    This is how you do it, every single time...
[18:48] ata
    The way you trample on my feelings!
[18:54] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[18:55] una
    That dark aura is definitely bad!
[18:58] shira
    Oh my god!
[18:59] fura
    I never thought his hatred
    would be so intense...
[19:06] dogo
    So bad, so bad, so bad!
[19:07] man
    We have to stop him!
[19:08] waku
    It appears we do...
[19:10] karu
    Then let's all...
[19:11] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[19:18] shu
    Then...
[19:20] shu
    It might be ten years too late, but...
[19:23] shu
    Ata. Let's go together...
[19:33] shu
    to the bath.
[19:37] (Flashback) shu
    Ata, let's go to the bath together.
[19:56] shu
    Sorry, Ata.
[20:13] shu
    What?
[20:14] shu
    A magic circle?
[20:18] bird
    Message for you!
[20:21] kar
    An emergency message from Honyala Land?
[20:24] fura
    What?
[20:26] bird
    It's from King Papa Kamo!
[20:28] bird
    Click!
[20:32] king
    Help me, Karls! Furanui!
[20:35] king
    Honyala Land is in danger!
[20:37] king
    Come back at once!
[20:42] bird
    Thank you very much.
[20:47] kar
    Papa Kamo...
[20:48] kiri
    You mean, that was your father?
[20:52] fura
    What has happened to Father?
[20:54] una
    Sounded like mortal danger of some kind.
[20:57] una
    Yeah...
[20:57] fura
    What?!
[20:59] kar
    Papa Kamo is... Papa Kamo is...
[21:06] dogo
    He's wailing...
[21:08] man
    Karls, who's usually so happy...
[21:14] shu
    Karls.
[21:17] shu
    It's really weird when you aren't happy.
[21:21] shu
    You've brought happiness to a
    lot of sad and miserable people.
[21:30] shu
    Weren't you always the one who
    could stay happy no matter what?
[21:35] shu
    Aren't you the one who wanted
    to make the whole world happy?
[21:40] kar
    That's right!
[21:41] kar
    If Honyala Land isn't happy,
    we need to go and make it happy!
[21:46] kiri
    That's the way, Karls!
[21:47] kiri
    Yeah, yeah, yeah! That's right.
[21:49] waku
    Looks like Kyotaro-kun
    talked him into that one.
[21:53] man
    Yeah...
[21:54] kar
    As prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
[21:57] kar
    Karls Knights, save Papa Kamo
    and all of Honyala Land!
[22:02] ---
    Right!
[22:04] ---
    Let's go!
[22:08] fura
    I shall be the one to save Father!
[22:11] fura
    Come along, Edelstein!
[22:14] una
    Ata?
[22:15] una
    Ibusuki-senpai?
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    Always HAPPY in the Heart!
[23:54] una
    Let's happy kiss our way to
    Always HAPPY in the Heart!
SIGN    
SIGN    What will become of Honyala Land's happiness? And how will it all end?

Season 4

12 - Always HAPPY in the Heart!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:15] ---
    What?
[00:21] ---
    Honyala Land is in danger!
[00:24] ---
    Come back at once!
[00:28] ---
    As prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
[00:31] ---
    Karls Knights, save Papa Kamo
    and all of Honyala Land!
[00:36] ---
    Right!
[00:37] ---
    Let's go!
[00:42] ---
    I shall be the one to save Father!
[00:44] ---
    Come along, Edelstein!
[00:47] ---
    Ata?
[00:48] ---
    Ibusuki-senpai?
[00:56] una
    Ata.
[00:59] una
    I've seen how hard you've been working.
[01:04] una
    I want you to be happy, Ata.
[01:10] shira
    Yeah!
[01:11] una
    Well, it's not easy to put this into words...
[01:14] una
    So, I'm not a fan of violence, but...
[01:17] una
    Bing!
[01:22] una
    Okay, let's go too!
[01:24] shira
    Okay!
SIGN    Honyala Land is under attack! What's happened to Papa Kamo?
SIGN    Will Ata and Kyotaro get their handshake? Will the world be filled with happiness?
SIGN    Always HAPPY in the Heart!
[01:49] kar
    This way, everyone!
[01:53] dogo
    Wow, wow, wow!
[01:55] dogo
    This is his magical kingdom?
[01:56] dogo
    Honyala Land?
[01:57] dogo
    It really exists?
[01:58] dogo
    You thought he was making it up?
[02:00] dogo
    Well...
[02:01] kar
    Anyway, let's hurry to Papa Kamo's palace!
[02:05] shu
    Sure.
[02:09] dogo
    Ouch, ouch, ouch!
[02:11] man
    What is all this?
[02:12] man
    Ichiro!
[02:18] kar
    Pa-para-pa!
[02:26] kar
    What are those things?
[02:30] kiri
    Tin soldiers?
[02:32] shu
    Karls, what are those?
[02:34] kar
    I don't know. I've never seen them before.
[02:39] dogo
    They're coming from this way, too!
[02:40] waku
    This way, too.
[02:41] man
    We're surrounded...
[02:50] man
    What is it?
[02:58] dogo
    These guys want to hurt us!
[03:00] man
    That was quite clear!
[03:09] waku
    More of this?
[03:12] man
    It's not stopping!
[03:13] shu
    Karls!
[03:14] kar
    I'll use my magic again...
[03:20] fura
    Prince Karls! Let's call
    a ceasefire for now.
[03:24] kar
    Furanui!
[03:25] shu
    Ata...
[03:26] fura
    What's going on here?
[03:28] fura
    Where are Honyala Land's people?
[03:31] kar
    None of this makes any sense...
[03:33] shu
    Ata... are you sure?
[03:35] ibu
    I may have lost, but I have my
    pride as a member of the Edelstein.
[03:39] una
    You know... We still have our knights'
    contract and all that, too...
[03:43] shira
    Right.
[03:45] shu
    I see.
[03:45] men
    Prince Karls! Prince Furanui!
[03:50] waku
    There are people over there.
[03:53] kar
    Are you guys okay?
[03:54] dogo
    So all the residents of Honyala Land...
[03:56] kiri
    ...really are all animals.
[03:58] man
    But there appears to be
    a bit too much variety...
[04:00] waku
    Let's just not think about it too hard.
[04:03] kar
    What happened, everyone?
[04:06] pure
    Minister Wao staged a coup d'etat!
[04:09] fura
    What? Minister Wao?
[04:11] shu
    Who's Minister Wao?
[04:12] kar
    He's our uncle!
[04:15] (Flashback) wao
    I, Wao, shall carry out my duties faithfully.
[04:19] fura
    Wao was our educator, as well.
[04:22] fura
    Why would such a wise man do this?
[04:24] kar
    And where have the people
    of Honyala Land gone?
[04:28] pure
    W-Well...
[04:32] shu
    What's that?
[04:39] kar
    A demon?
[04:40] kar
    Kyotaro!
[04:41] kar
    Look!
[04:46] kar
    The people...
[04:47] kar
    So that's how it works.
[04:56] una
    If that beam hits you,
     I guess it turns you into a tin soldier.
[05:00] shira
    That was close...
[05:01] kar
    Furanui, I'm putting up a barrier!
[05:03] kar
    Help me out!
[05:05] fura
    Agreed!
[05:07] both
    Hai-hai-sir!
[05:12] dogo
    They got it!
[05:13] kiri
    Nice job, Karls!
[05:15] ibu
    No, they only blocked the shot...
[05:41] kar
    Come out, Minister Wao!
[05:43] fura
    We know you're in there!
[05:52] kamo
    Karls! Furanui!
[05:54] kamo
    I was hoping you could save me!
[05:57] wao
    I see you've both returned.
[06:03] shu
    That's Minister Wao?
[06:05] kamo
    Karls... Furanui...
[06:07] kamo
    Wao may be engaging in a
    rather terrible scheme...
[06:10] wao
    Silence!
[06:11] kamo
    I think that hurts, maybe!
[06:14] kar
    Papa Kamo!
[06:15] fura
    Father!
[06:15] fura
    Minister Wao! How could you do this?
[06:18] kar
    It's awful! Just awful!
[06:19] wao
    It's all the fault of this foolish,
    incompetent King Papa Kamo.
[06:23] karu
    Just what has Papa Kamo done?
[06:25] wao
    Nothing, and that's the problem!
[06:27] kar
    What?
[06:29] wao
    Drunk on peace, he lets the
    people do whatever they want,
[06:32] wao
    neglecting all of his
    responsibilities as king.
[06:36] kar
    That's not true! Everyone
    loves Papa Kamo's kindness!
[06:40] fura
    Honyala Land was a peaceful nation.
[06:44] wao
    Fool! Don't you realize that
    peace leads to depravity?
[06:50] kar
    But, but... I thought everyone
    in Honyala Land was happy.
[06:55] wao
    Listen to me, princes and
    airhead manservants...
[06:59] dogo
    Don't call us airheads!
[07:00] waku
    I object to "manservant", as well.
[07:02] man
    You wanna step outside, huh?!
[07:03] kiri
    We're just trying to make everyone happy!
[07:07] wao
    That is the very foolishness
    I'm talking about!
[07:10] kar
    Why? Why is it wrong if everyone's happy?
[07:14] wao
    Just as peace births depravity...
[07:16] wao
    when someone shines with a happy aura,
    they projects a shadow behind them.
[07:20] wao
    This is the law of the world.
[07:23] fura
    I can't claim that I don't understand.
[07:26] ata
    Yes.
[07:28] wao
    I have served the airheaded, incompetent
    Papa Kamo for a very long time.
[07:39] (Flashback) kamo
    I may be happy!
[07:40] (Flashback) kar
    Feels nice, huh? I'm so happy!
[07:43] (Flashback) kamo
    C'mon, Furanui! Minister Wao!
[07:45] (Flashback) kamo
    You might want to bathe in
    the sun with us, perhaps!
[07:48] (Flashback) wao
    I fear that if bandits attacked
    while I was sunbathing,
[07:53] (Flashback) wao
    I would be unable to protect you.
[07:55] (Flashback) fura
    I agree with Minister Wao.
[07:58] (Flashback) kar
    Then why don't we take turns?
[08:01] (Flashback) kar
    While you two sunbathe, we'll keep watch!
[08:04] (Flashback) kamo
    That might just be a good idea!
[08:07] (Flashback) kamo
    Karls, sometimes I think
    you might have great ideas!
[08:10] (Flashback) kamo
    Huggle, huggle!
[08:12] (Flashback) kamo
    Huggle, huggle!
[08:13] (Flashback) kamo
    Huggle, huggle!
[08:17] wao
    And that's when I realized...
[08:19] wao
    Furanui, you are the same as I am.
[08:23] wao
    Though born to different mothers,
    Papa Kamo and I were both in line for the throne.
[08:28] wao
    However, my perfectionism lost
     to Papa Kamo's imperfectionism.
[08:34] wao
    Is it not an insult to be put in
    competition with that fool Karls?
[08:41] wao
    Prince Furanui...
[08:42] wao
    I think you belong with me!
[08:48] kar
    Furanui!
[08:49] wao
    Prince Furanui.
[08:51] wao
    I'm sure you wanted to enjoy the
    sun with your father and brother.
[08:56] wao
    But when you showed restraint,
[08:58] wao
    your father lavished praise on
    your airhead brother instead.
[09:03] wao
    You must have found it terribly sad.
[09:06] ---
    Surely you asked yourself:
    Why am I not praised?
[09:08] ---
    Why am I not loved?
[09:12] ---
    And you then began to hate your brother.
[09:18] ---
    Your love turned to hatred.
[09:22] fura
    Love...
[09:23] fura
    Turned to hatred?
[09:25] wao
    Prince Furanui, if you join me now,
[09:28] wao
    I will make you next in
    the line of succession.
[09:31] karu
    Furanui!
[09:33] karu
    You won't abandon Papa Kamo, will you?
[09:35] karu
    He's our papa, you know?
[09:39] wao
    Listen, Furanui...
[09:40] wao
    The king's love has always been exclusively
    bestowed upon the airhead Karls.
[09:45] wao
    There's no place for you
    with the two of them!
[09:51] (Flashback) both
    Whee!
[09:53] fura
    It's true...
[09:54] fura
    There was no place for me there.
[09:57] ata
    I know how you feel.
[10:01] ibu
    But even if you have no place, do
    you truly hate Karls and Papa Kamo?
[10:09] ata
    I'm sure you felt annoyed
    about how they acted happy
[10:11] ata
    and never noticed you.
[10:15] ata
    You probably felt lonely, too.
[10:19] ata
    But is that the same as truly hating someone?
[10:23] ata
    Isn't it a hatred that indicates love?
[10:26] fura
    True. You may be right...
[10:30] fura
    But what of it?
[10:32] fura
    It doesn't change the fact that the king
    showered all his love on Karls instead of me!
[10:38] shu
    But Karls didn't treat you that way, did he?
[10:41] shu
    Karls never said anything bad about you, ever.
[10:47] shu
    And if you went with that guy,
    Karls would probably cry for real.
[10:52] shu
    He'd be really sad.
[10:54] kar
    Yeah! Because I love you, Furanui!
[10:59] shu
    You may feel like you're alone,
    but I don't think you really are.
[11:05] ata
    Furanui!
[11:06] ata
    Have you ever made the decision to join him?
[11:11] ata
    I never did.
[11:14] ata
    I always just waited for him to talk to me...
[11:17] ata
    I never went up and talked to him.
[11:20] ata
    Something inside me wouldn't let me do it.
[11:23] ata
    But now...
[11:29] shu
    Anyway, for now, let's save Papa Kamo.
[11:34] shu
    We can think about the
    rest in the bath later.
[11:39] ata
    Not a bad proposal.
[11:42] shu
    What do you think, Furanui?
[11:46] kar
    Furanui!
[11:50] fura
    Agreed!
[11:53] fura
    Minister Wao!
[11:55] fura
    You tricked us so that you could
    incite rebellion against our king!
[11:59] fura
    Now you will pay!
[12:02] wao
    Furanui...
[12:03] wao
    So you've been taken in by Karls'
    "happy" nonsense as well...
[12:07] wao
    I had you study kingship
[12:10] wao
    in the hopes that you would be the
    successor to my reign of terror...
[12:14] wao
    But never mind that now.
[12:15] wao
    In that case, I'll punish you all!
[12:21] kar
    We won't lose! We want everyone to be happy!
[12:32] fura
    Minister Wao!
[12:33] fura
    Did you pit Karls and me against each
    other so that you could prepare your coup?
[12:41] kar
    That's awful! It's not happy at all!
[12:44] wao
    Indeed I did.
[12:45] wao
    And Honyala Land is now mine!
[12:48] fura
    I won't let you get away with this!
[12:51] wao
    Won't you?
[12:57] shu
    This again?
[13:18] ata
    Are you all right?
[13:19] shu
    Yeah...
[13:20] kar
    Be careful!
[13:21] fura
    It's coming again!
[13:26] wao
    How dare you!
[13:28] wao
    Take this!
[13:31] both
    Hai-hai-sir!
[13:34] wao
    Your magic isn't strong enough to stop this!
[13:48] wao
    Is that all the power you can bring to bear?
[13:51] wao
    I'll wipe happiness from
    the face of this world!
[13:54] kamo
    Minister Wao...
[13:57] kamo
    Rather... my little brother Wao...
[13:59] wao
    You're calling me your little brother now?
[14:02] wao
    I've served you all this time
    and you never cared how I felt!
[14:05] kamo
    Wao, I don't believe I've ever
    held any enmity towards you.
[14:11] wao
    That can't be true!
[14:13] kamo
    It's true, I think!
[14:15] kamo
    I let you lead the ship of state
    because I trusted you, I think.
[14:20] kamo
    Wao, I don't think I ever knew
    you were so upset, probably.
[14:26] wao
    Stop ducking responsibility!
    Say something without hedging!
[14:29] kamo
    I love you!
[14:33] kamo
    I love Karls and Furanui too, I think.
[14:36] wao
    No... It can't be true!
[14:39] kamo
    I felt happy, I do believe...
[14:42] kamo
    Yes, that night when we looked
    at the moon together...
[14:48] (Flashback) both
    Look, a rabbit!
[14:50] (Flashback) kamo
    Maybe?
[14:53] kamo
    Wao. Do you feel like you remember that?
[14:56] wao
    I do...
[14:58] wao
    You're right that I felt happy then.
[15:01] shu
    That kind of thing does happen.
[15:03] shu
    Happiness comes from the most trivial things.
[15:07] waku
    Like when I get an upright stalk in my tea.
[15:09] dogo
    When I land a ball of scrap
    paper in the wastebasket!
[15:12] kiri
    When I wake up thinking I'm late,
    but I realize I have time to spare!
[15:16] man
    Or when I look at the clock
    and it's all the same number.
[15:20] una
    For me...
[15:22] una
    I feel happy whenever I get the taste of
    pickled plum in the rice of my shumai.
[15:27] shira
    For me, it's when I do my hair just right.
[15:31] ata
    For me... When I learned how to
    spin my mechanical pencil, I think.
[15:38] kar
    That's right!
[15:39] kar
    Happiness isn't something you seek out!
    It's something you feel!
[15:47] wao
    What is this happy aura?
[15:49] shu
    I think it's impossible to wipe
    happiness from the world, don't you?
[15:54] shu
    It's something that just
    comes to you from all around.
[15:58] ata
    Yes. If you take a step
    forward, it's there.
[16:01] wao
    Take a step forward?
[16:04] kar
    Okay, let's all make Minister Wao happy!
[16:11] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:13] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:14] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:16] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:18] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:19] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:21] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:22] kar
    Are you happy? Yes!
[16:29] kar
    Make you happy! Yeah!
[16:36] kar
    Make you happy! Yeah!
[16:37] kar
    When you're happy, you happy it up!
[16:40] kar
    Awesome!
[16:41] kar
    Everybody happy now!
    Happy it down! Hap-hap-happy!
[16:44] kar
    Happy bath! Happy dive!
[16:45] kar
    Happy happy now!
[16:47] kar
    Happy bath! Happy dive!
[16:49] kar
    Happy happy for you!
[16:51] kar
    Being happy means happying!
[16:52] kar
    Happy up your happiness!
[16:54] kar
    Time to happy it up to ultra happy!
[16:57] kar
    Happy bath! Happy dive!
[16:59] kar
    Happy happy now!
[17:00] kar
    Happy bath! Happy dive!
[17:02] kar
    Happy happy for you!
[17:04] waku
    Anywhere you are, there's a
    way to be happy! Check it out!
[17:07] waku
    Where is it?
[17:07] waku
    Right here!
[17:08] waku
    Over there?
[17:08] waku
    There too!
[17:09] waku
    Everywhere?
[17:10] waku
    Happy in the bath!
[17:11] waku
    Happy with a nap!
[17:12] waku
    Happy in your room!
[17:13] waku
    Happy with a kiss!
[17:14] waku
    Happy with magic!
[17:14] waku
    Happy with sweets!
[17:15] waku
    Happy! Happy! Happy! Happy!
[17:19] waku
    Let's happy hour!
[17:21] waku
    Super Happy Fiore Kiss!
[17:27] waku
    Super Happy Stella Kiss!
[17:32] waku
    Super Happy Luna Kiss!
[17:37] waku
    Super Happy Neve Kiss!
[17:42] waku
    Super Happy Spazio Kiss!
[17:47] waku
    Super Happy Ritter Diamant!
[17:52] waku
    Super Happy Ritter Rosenquarz!
[17:56] waku
    Super Happy Ritter Amethyst!
[18:06] waku
    Are you happy? Yes!
[18:08] waku
    Are you happy? Yes!
[18:09] waku
    Are you happy? Yes!
[18:11] waku
    Are you happy? Yes!
[18:13] waku
    Are you happy? Yes!
[18:14] waku
    Are you happy? Yes!
[18:16] waku
    Are you happy? Yes!
[18:18] waku
    Let's happy hour!
[18:20] waku
    We want to see that smile of yours again
[18:27] waku
    That's why we came running here to see you
[18:33] waku
    We'll do everything we can to make you happy!
[18:39] waku
    Let's happy hour!
[18:52] waku
    Return to happiness!
[18:54] waku
    Super Happy and Turn!
[19:14] waku
    Feels like heaven...
[19:22] shu
    Super Happy End.
[19:27] puri
    What a nice nap...
[19:31] kamo
    There, there.
[19:32] kamo
    Wao, I think you should
    rest a while, maybe...
[19:35] kamo
    You've been working very hard.
    You're very tired, I expect.
[19:39] wao
    After all I did...
[19:42] wao
    why would you be so kind to me?
[19:44] kamo
    Because you're my dear brother, probably.
[19:52] karu
    That's right, take a nice nap in the sun.
[19:56] karu
    We can't be happy unless
    you're happy, Minister Wao!
[20:02] shu
    Go on and be happy.
[20:29] kiri
    This is heaven!
[20:31] dogo
    Yeah, it sure is heaven.
[20:34] waku
    I think I can agree with that.
[20:36] man
    You think everything's back
    to normal in Honyala Land?
[20:39] una
    I think it's probably fine.
[20:40] una
    We saw the birth of two kings.
[20:43] (Flashback) kamo
    My beloved princes!
[20:46] (Flashback) kamo
    You did a wonderful job making
    everyone happy, I think.
[20:49] (Flashback) fura
    Karls, I lost to you.
[20:52] (Flashback) fura
    Happiness is necessary to
    rule a country, after all.
[20:56] (Flashback) fura
    You're more suited to being king than I.
[20:58] (Flashback) karu
    It's not about winning or losing.
[21:00] (Flashback) karu
    The question is about whether
    you're happy or not.
[21:05] (Flashback) fura
    In that regard, I really can't beat you.
[21:07] (Flashback) shu
    Then why don't you become
    co-kings or something?
[21:10] (Flashback) kamo
    Oh, that would good, maybe!
[21:13] (Flashback) kamo
    You can each compensate
    for the other's weaknesses
[21:15] (Flashback) kamo
    and rule Honyala Land together, perhaps.
[21:20] shira
    I wonder if they're really
    going to be co-kings.
[21:23] dogo
    He did say maybe...
[21:26] man
    Like he was ducking the question.
[21:28] una
    Papa Kamo is a duck, he has to talk like one.
[21:31] waku
    You are now both kings... I think?
[21:34] kiri
    It's all so non-committal.
[21:51] shu
    We haven't had our handshake, have we?
[22:07] shu
    Baths feel nice, don't they?
[22:09] ata
    Yeah.
[22:11] shu
    Ata, let's take a bath together another time.
[22:15] shu
    I've come here pretty much every day since then.
[22:19] shu
    I guess you could call it a habit?
SIGN    They brought hot springs from the human world to make all of Honyala Land happy!
SIGN    Thanks for watching, everybody! I hope we can meet again some day!
SIGN    Now, one last time... Are you happy?