Season 1

1 - In the Name of Love

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[00:14] atsushi
    Ah, it's great being first in the bath.
[00:16] en
    Atsushi, you know, there's something
    I've been thinking about lately.
[00:21] atsushi
    What is it, En-chan?
    The tax increase? The Olympics?
[00:24] en
    No, chikuwabu.
[00:26] atsushi
    Chikuwabu?
[00:27] en
    He's a real mystery, you know?
[00:30] atsushi
    It's just chikuwabu...
[00:33] en
    Not quite chikuwa, not quite fu.
[00:35] en
    He doesn't exist outside of oden.
[00:37] en
    Why is he even alive?
[00:39] atsu
    Well, it's not alive...
[00:40] en
    He's excluded from both the paste products
    group and the wheat gluten group.
[00:45] en
    When I think about how he must feel,
    it's kind of depressing.
[00:48] atsu
    But there are people who like chikuwabu.
[00:51] en
    Oh? You like chikuwabu?
[00:53] en
    Gonna start a club? A chikuwabu-bu?
[00:55] atsu
    What? Chikuwabu-bu is too hard to say.
[00:58] en
    It's the wabu-bu who plot
    to dominate via chikuwabu.
[01:01] atsu
    You're abbreviating it...
[01:03] en
    Daikon radish and tofu fritters
    contribute to the diversity that is oden
[01:08] en
    by creating a savory flavor.
[01:11] en
    Yet chikuwabu only absorbs that savoriness,
[01:14] en
    offering nothing of its own.
[01:15] atsu
    Couldn't you say the same of konjac?
[01:17] en
    No, konjac is at least flexible.
[01:21] en
    It's broad-minded enough to absorb that
    savoriness into its deepest parts.
[01:25] en
    Yet, with chikuwabu, you can
    boil it for hours and hours,
[01:28] en
    and most of it will remain nothing
    but wheat flour mixed with water.
[01:33] en
    It gives off the superficial appearance
    of melting and integrating itself while,
[01:38] en
    deep down, it rejects others and
    denies its wheat-based origins.
[01:41] atsu
    Uh, En-chan, do you hate chikuwabu?
[01:44] en
    I don't know if I hate it.
[01:45] en
    I just feel like I'm looking at an unknown lifeform.
[01:48] atsu
    But it's not a lifeform...
[01:55] wombat
    Where might this be?
[01:59] atsu
    A public bath... Why do you ask?
[02:01] wombat
    What is a pub-lic-bath?
[02:03] atsu
    It's a place where you pay money
    to sit in heated water,
[02:06] atsu
    to maintain bodily hygiene and relax the mind.
[02:10] wombat
    Relax the mind!
[02:12] wombat
    The people of this planet have an even
    more refined civilization than I thought!
[02:19] wombat
    How I should like to protect this planet...
[02:22] ---
    R-Right...
[02:23] wombat
    Would you mind helping me?
[02:27] wombat
    Please!
[02:30] wombat
    Um... I'd just like...
[02:32] wombat
    to talk...
[02:36] en
    H-Hey! It stinks! It hurts!
    The fur's pricking me!
[02:39] atsu
    What is this thing? A bear? A dog? A pig?
[02:41] yumoto
    Sirs! Please, no wrestling in the bath!
[02:46] yumoto
    A wombat!
[02:51] yumoto
    Diprotodontia Macropodidae!
[02:52] yumoto
    Cousin to the koala!
[02:54] yumoto
    They get sick if they get lonely
    and have flat noses!
[02:57] ---
    There, there! Don't struggle!
[03:00] wombat
    Help me!
[03:05] en
    That kid is something else.
[03:07] en
    Most people would run at the
    sight of a creature like that.
[03:09] en
    And a pink one, no less.
[03:11] atsu
    He's a first year at our school.
    Hakone Yumoto, I think.
[03:21] atsu
    Heading home now?
[03:24] en
    The student council must have it rough.
[03:27] yuuma
    And you must have it easy.
[03:30] en
    In oden terms, they're daikon radish,
    egg, and mochi-stuffed tofu.
[03:35] atsu
    Is that a compliment?
[03:36] en
    A serious compliment.
    That's the golden trio, you know?
[03:39] atsu
    No konjac, huh?
[03:42] yumoto
    Wait for me!
[03:45] atsu
    So what is he? In oden terms.
[03:48] en
    The pot, maybe?
[03:49] atsu
    That's not food...
[03:51] wombat
    Help!
[03:53] yumoto
    Wait, I said!
SIGN    In the Name of Love
SIGN    Binan High School
[04:10] chiku
    My name is Chiku Kazutake.
SIGN    Chiku Kazutake
[04:13] chiku
    I'm a student at Binan High School.
[04:16] chiku
    I have no strong subjects.
    No weak subjects, either.
[04:19] chiku
    I'm a member of the Biology Club,
    but I never actually attend.
[04:23] chiku
    My theory is that humans can be
    divided into three categories... I think.
[04:28] man
    The beautiful Nozomi invited us to a mixer.
[04:31] man
    Sorry, my schedule's full already.
[04:33] chiku
    The beautiful, the ugly...
    and those who are neither.
[04:38] man
    I'm going to be participating
    in the Math Olympics.
[04:41] man
    I'm in the New Year's poetry reading!
[04:43] chiku
    The smart, the stupid...
    and those who are neither.
[04:48] man
    Ten more laps!
[04:49] man
    Okay! C'mon!
[04:51] chiku
    The athletic, the frail...
    and those who are neither.
[04:57] man
    What?
[04:58] man
    I bumped into something.
[05:01] chiku
    I'm... the third kind.
SIGN    Class 3-C
[05:19] atsu
    Stand!
[05:23] student
    Is that a pet?
[05:23] student
    A stuffed animal?
[05:24] student
    Isn't it huge?
[05:25] student
    It's giant!
[05:25] student
    Why'd he bring an animal here?
[05:27] student
    Hey, you think Tawarayama's
    finally... you know?
[05:29] student
    That, huh?
[05:31] student
    Finally losing his marbles?
[05:34] atsu
    Bow.
[05:36] atsu
    Take your seats.
[05:38] wombat
    You boys are...
[05:41] student
    Did that voice come from the animal?
[05:43] student
    That wasn't Tawarayama's voice.
[05:45] tamura
    No. It is nothing.
[05:47] tamura
    We shall begin class now.
[05:51] student
    "Shall"?
[05:52] student
    "Shall"?
[05:54] atsu
    En-chan...
[05:55] en
    I've got a bad feeling about this.
[06:00] tamura
    Ah, begging your pardon, you two.
[06:03] tamura
    No, please, wait for me!
[06:06] wombat
    Won't you please hear me out?
[06:09] atsu
    Yeah, he's talking.
[06:10] wombat
    Oh, forgive me.
[06:11] wombat
    Circumstances demand that
    I draw attention away from myself,
[06:15] wombat
    so I would appreciate it if you would act
    as if you're speaking to this individual.
[06:19] atsu
    Little late for that!
[06:20] wombat
    But to meet you two again
    like this must be destiny!
[06:24] en
    No, destiny has nothing to do with it.
[06:25] wombat
    Please come with me!
[06:26] en
    Pass.
[06:27] wombat
    Do you mean "pass" as in "approved"?
[06:29] atsu
    Is that some old con man trick?
[06:31] en
    On Earth, it means "I refuse."
[06:33] wombat
    Wonderful!
[06:35] wombat
    Please, teach me everything there is
    to know about Earth culture and customs!
[06:39] atsu
    Too much responsibility!
[06:40] en
    Why don't you ask Mr. Tawarayama?
[06:42] wombat
    Oh, no, you see, this individual has some
    difficulties with mobility and endurance...
[06:46] en
    That seemed vaguely insulting.
[06:47] atsu
    Wasn't he turning 77 this year?
[06:49] en
    No, that's not what I'm talking about.
[06:50] wombat
    Setting that aside, I want us to protect this
    lovable Earth with the power of love together!
[06:56] wombat
    Why, you ask? I do it all for love!
[06:59] en
    No, we didn't ask.
[07:00] atsu
    Sorry, but we have other things to do.
[07:01] en
    That's right! I need to meditate
    on the matter of chikuwabu!
[07:05] wombat
    Chikuwabu? What's that?
[07:07] en
    It's a thing that exists, yet does not exist!
    Like a symbol of uncertainty!
[07:11] en
    I'm trying to figure out the purpose
    of chikuwabu's existence!
[07:17] chiku
    Chikuwabu's... purpose?
[07:22] yumoto
    So this is where you were!
[07:24] yumoto
    What, are you trying to be
    Mr. Tawarayama's pet?
[07:27] yumoto
    Using him as your hands?
     Going undercover? Want a rice ball?
[07:30] wombat
    Pardon me, but would you mind
    saving me from that threat?
[07:34] en
    Why?
[07:35] wombat
    I realize that he presents no hatred
    or malice, but instincts dictate...
[07:39] yumoto
    I won't let you run again!
[07:41] wombat
    I'll die if he gets near me!
[07:43] yumoto
    Why? Why? I read on the net
    that wombats love rice balls!
[07:47] yumoto
    I wanna cuddle you!
[07:48] wombat
    Pass!
[07:50] yumoto
    That means "approved," right?
[07:53] atsu
    Are you okay?
[07:55] chiku
    Yes...
[07:57] atsu
    I don't know whether to call it
    a question or an opinion, but...
[08:00] atsu
    Those two really aren't on the
    same wavelength, are they?
[08:03] en
    Not a bit.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[08:07] ryuu
    Yo.
[08:08] io
    Good day, Senpai.
[08:10] atsu
    Io. How are you doing today?
[08:12] io
    Feeling like I just dropped a
    lump of butter into boiling oil.
[08:15] atsu
    And you, Ryuu?
[08:16] ryuu
    Just perfect, by certain standards.
[08:18] io
    I melted off twenty million in twenty minutes.
[08:21] ryuu
    I ended up triple-booked.
    I'm really in trouble.
[08:24] en
    You guys amaze me.
[08:26] io
    Money is...
[08:27] ryuu
    Women are...
[08:28] both
    Life!
[08:30] io
    Oh, speaking of which,
[08:31] io
    I found this on the door.
SIGN    Urgent Please register your club officially. -Student Council
[08:34] en
    A student council request for club registration?
[08:37] atsu
    In other words, if we want to use the room,
    we need to officially register as a club.
[08:42] en
    What a pain.
[08:43] ryuu
    That's why I keep telling you
[08:45] ryuu
    we should be the Innocent Co-Ed Mingle Club!
[08:47] atsu
    That violates public decency!
[08:49] io
    Then what about the
    Economics in Practice Club?
[08:52] atsu
    It's lacking in high school student character!
[08:54] atsu
    ...is what the student council
    president would say, I expect.
[08:57] en
    Good point.
[08:58] en
    Why not just make it the Earth Defense Club?
[09:01] atsu
    Oh, that thing hanging on the door...
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[09:03] io
    The mystery sign that's been hanging
    there since who knows when, right?
[09:07] en
    Why not? This is a pain.
[09:08] atsu
    We can't do that.
[09:10] atsu
    We've been buying time by
    saying we'll submit it soon,
[09:13] atsu
    but this might be the limit.
[09:14] io
    Clubs need at least five members.
[09:16] ryuu
    We need an advisor, too.
[09:21] atsu
    Mr. Tawarayama?!
[09:23] ryuu
    Is he... dead?
[09:31] en
    The aftermath?
SIGN    Hakone Yumoto
    Born January 26th
    Blood Type O / Aquarius
    Hobby: Exercise
    Likes: Animals, rice balls
[09:53] chiku
    The purpose of chikuwabu...
[09:56] chiku
    It has no purpose.
[09:57] chiku
    Chikuwabu could disappear
    and no one would care.
[10:00] white
    That's right. And you could disappear, too...
[10:13] yumoto
    This is bliss.
[10:14] yumoto
    Cuddling really is great!
[10:17] atsu
    Are you Hakone Yumoto?
[10:19] yumoto
    Yeah! Thanks for always
    usin' the Kurotama Bath!
[10:22] yumoto
    Aren't animals awesome?
[10:24] yumoto
    My cuddle battery's charged up
    for the first time in forever!
[10:29] en
    I think he really is dea—
[10:31] atsu
    Don't say it.
[10:36] en
    He came back to life?!
[10:38] wombat
    After all this, I won't
    ask any more of you boys!
[10:40] wombat
    On the contrary, I'm going to
    make you take responsibility!
[10:44] atsu
    Responsibility?
[10:45] ryuu
    For what?
[10:46] yumoto
    He's saying we can cuddle
    for the rest of our lives!
[10:49] wombat
    It'll take too long to explain,
    so I'll make it quick!
[10:52] wombat
    Lovracelet!
[10:58] yumoto
    What's this?
[10:59] yumoto
    You're giving them to us?
    "The Wombat Returns"?
[11:02] wombat
    The Lovracelets are your love, given form!
[11:05] yumoto
    Wombat's love given form?
[11:08] en
    Wait, what the hell is "love given form"?
[11:11] yumoto
    It buzzed!
[11:12] ryu
    Are these defective?
[11:14] io
    That's a problem. Should I contact the
    manufacturer and earn us a quick buck?
[11:17] atsu
    You're surprisingly unscrupulous.
[11:20] wombat
    They are not defective!
[11:23] wombat
    That's the Lovracelet's Love Alert!
[11:25] wombat
    Let's go!
[11:28] wombat
    It kindly lets you know immediately
[11:30] wombat
    when the loveless are thinking loveless
    thoughts and taking loveless actions!
[11:35] atsu
    "Kindly" lets us know?
[11:37] yumoto
    You're pretty smart for
    someone so fuzzy, Wombat.
[11:39] wombat
    Incidentally, I am not one of your
    Earth mammals known as the wombat.
[11:44] yumoto
    What?!
[11:46] ryuu
    No, I think it's weirder that
    you're surprised by that.
[11:48] yumoto
    But he can speak our language!
[11:50] io
    No, I think that just makes it weirder.
[11:52] atsu
    And he's pink, at that.
[11:54] wombat
    Don't worry about conversing.
[11:56] wombat
    I have a high-performance
    automatic translator.
[11:59] io
    That's an amazing thing to just blurt out.
[12:01] wombat
    My name is $%@ and I come from &!@$.
[12:04] atsu
    What? Say that again?
[12:06] wombat
    I am ^%@
# and I come from $!@#.
[12:09] en
    Was it different that time?
[12:10] wombat
    It's %
@#$%!
[12:11] yumoto
    Oh, forget it! We can just go with
    Wombat. Right, Wombat?
[12:15] chikuwa
    What's your deal, man?
[12:16] chikuwa
    Huh? Huh?
[12:19] chikuwa
    You got a problem with me? Huh? Huh?
[12:22] yumoto
    What's that thing?
[12:24] ryuu
    Chikuwabu.
[12:25] io
    You said it!
[12:26] ryuu
    But it's clearly chikuwabu!
[12:29] yumoto
    The Chikawabu Monster?
[12:31] atsu
    You just casually named it.
[12:32] en
    Aren't you going to cuddle it?
[12:34] yumoto
    Nah, that's a little out of my range.
[12:36] atsu
    You have a range?
[12:38] yumoto
    What are you saying? Of course I do.
[12:41] yumoto
    Doesn't it look a little sticky?
[12:43] atsu
    Its surface does seem to be melting...
[12:45] en
    It's a little gross for me, too.
[12:47] ryuu
    Is it?
[12:48] io
    Uh, I think the monster part is a bigger
    problem than the chikuwabu part...
[12:51] wombat
    That's right!
[12:53] wombat
    Now, you must "Love Making"
    into the Battle Lovers!
[12:56] en
    Huh? Love Ma—
[12:58] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[13:01] io
    What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
[13:04] ryuu
    "Beloved Earth"?
[13:06] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[13:09] io
    You, too?
[13:11] io
    Love is all!
[13:14] atsu
    Are you... being forced to say this?
[13:16] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[13:18] yumoto
    I get it!
[13:19] yumoto
    Making us pose and say embarrassing lines
    is part of your mysterious power, right?
[13:23] wom
    No, it is the power of love!
[13:26] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[13:29] five
    Battle Lovers!
[13:33] yumoto
    Love Making!
[14:00] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[14:01] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[14:05] en
    Love Making.
[14:15] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[14:16] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[14:19] atsu
    Love Making!
[14:29] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[14:30] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[14:34] io
    Love Making.
[14:44] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[14:45] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[14:48] ryuu
    Love Making!
[14:58] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[14:59] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[15:02] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[15:05] five
    Of love!
[15:08] yumoto
    What is all this?!
[15:11] en
    We look like some third-rate idol group.
[15:14] io
    I know. The needless exposure
    and mysterious ornamentations...
[15:17] io
    This is clearly beyond weird.
[15:19] ryuu
    But it looks better on
    me than I was expecting!
[15:21] io
    I suppose it does.
[15:23] ryuu
    This will be trouble!
    I'll end up even more popular.
[15:26] atsu
    It won't come off!
[15:27] en
    Seriously?
[15:28] en
    Seriously!
[15:29] io
    What, we have to stay like this forever?!
[15:31] en
    Please, undo this!
[15:33] wombat
    It's a bit late to be saying that!
[15:35] wombat
    You boys are the Battle Lovers
    who protect the Earth!
[15:39] yumoto
    And what's this "Sparkling Prince" stuff?
[15:41] yumoto
    I don't think it's quite right
    for me to call myself a prince.
[15:44] atsu
    You seem overly self-conscious.
[15:46] wombat
    No matter.
[15:47] wombat
    You are the heirs to the throne of love,
[15:49] wombat
    so you have the right to call yourselves princes.
[15:53] en
    It's not about having the right...
[15:55] atsu
    First of all, we don't
    want to be heirs to that.
[15:57] wombat
    What was that?!
[15:59] yumoto
    I don't even know what
    the "throne of love" is.
[16:01] ryuu
    I hope it's romantic love.
[16:02] io
    It's not.
[16:04] chikuwa
    I don't need love!
[16:08] atsu
    The Chikuwabu Monster has lost his temper!
[16:10] atsu
    He forced his way into the conversation!
[16:12] chikuwa
    Live and die for love? Hah!
[16:15] chikuwa
    Humans should all just die!
[16:19] yumoto
    Broth? Broth?!
[16:20] chikuwa
    No one needs daikon radish, egg,
     chikuwa, hanpen, or cabbage rolls!
[16:24] chikuwa
    I'm going to make a world of only chikuwabu!
[16:27] trio
    Huh?!
[16:29] chikuwa
    Once I do, the world will be united!
[16:38] atsu
    What is this?
[16:39] wombat
    This is your Love Making power!
[16:42] wombat
    It's a "love up" of your inner love!
[16:46] yumoto
    Cool!
[16:48] yumoto
    Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy!
[16:49] wombat
    You tried to destroy the people
    who live on this lovable Earth.
[16:54] wombat
    Go, and love even your enemies!
[17:00] yumoto
    Love Stick!
[17:04] en
    Huh? Is this love or discipline?
[17:08] wombat
    Love, while gentle, is also harsh!
[17:10] yumoto
    Can I shoot a beam with this? Can I?
[17:13] yumoto
    Can I?!
[17:15] yumoto
    I can!
[17:16] four
    Seriously?!
[17:17] chikuwa
    Love can go take a hike!
[17:22] yumoto
    Yeah!
[17:23] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince is gonna
    sparkle your sparkles off!
[17:34] atsu
    It's incredible how quickly he adapts.
[17:36] en
    Yeah.
[17:38] ryuu
    I don't like letting him
    get all the limelight.
[17:41] oi
    Oh? You getting in the mood?
[17:43] ryuu
    I could tell great stories about this later.
[17:44] ryuu
    I'm going to join the fight!
[17:47] atsu
    Well, we may as well treat a farce as a farce...
[17:49] en
    ...and just get it over with quickly.
[17:51] io
    Yeah.
[18:00] atsu
    Um, let's go with... Something-or-Other Storm!
[18:04] monster
    What?!
[18:06] atsu
    It actually fired!
[18:07] en
    That was pretty random.
[18:09] en
    Random Splash!
[18:13] io
    Then I'll join in.
[18:14] io
    Added Margin Bomber!
[18:18] ryuu
    That's not fair! I got here first!
[18:20] ryuu
    I Am Awesome Fire!
[18:25] monster
    Five against one is cheating!
[18:27] atsu
    Yeah, right. You were the one
    saying all humans should die.
[18:31] atsu
    You can't let five of them scare you.
[18:33] yumoto
    Okay, let's go! Something-or-Other—
[18:35] wombat
    Pardon me.
[18:36] wombat
    Could you all please stop calling
    out random attack names?
[18:42] yumoto
    In that case, our powers unite to...
[18:56] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[19:12] atsu
    Hey, Yumoto, that was overkill.
[19:15] monster
    I don't need your pity.
[19:17] monster
    Charity and comfort are useless to me.
[19:22] en
    That's convenient for an enemy to say.
[19:24] atsu
    Stop this! If you say any more,
    you'll raise a defeat flag!
[19:28] monster
    We chikuwabu have a chikuwabu sort of pride!
[19:32] monster
    Even if you won't acknowledge its existence,
[19:34] monster
    I will continue to live on, as chikuwabu!
[19:37] atsu
    It's not that we don't acknowledge it...
[19:40] ryuu
    If I have to choose one way or
    the other, I like chikuwabu.
[19:43] en
    Yeah.
[19:44] en
    Some people have strange tastes.
    Good things will come your way someday.
[19:47] io
    That's not very convincing support.
[19:50] monster
    Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
[19:52] monster
    I don't need your support!
[19:54] monster
    Inconspicuousness is still a flavor!
[19:56] monster
    It beats ending up with a dubious status like
    burdock tempura or squid tentacle tempura!
[20:00] monster
    Lay off, jerk!
[20:05] en
    Physical force?
[20:06] atsu
    What was the point of that
    finishing move earlier?
[20:08] yumoto
    Listen, you need to wake up!
[20:11] yumoto
    Oden isn't complete with only one ingredient.
[20:14] yumoto
    The popular trio of daikon radish,
    egg, and mochi-stuffed tofu,
[20:18] yumoto
    the low-profile burdock tempura,
[20:19] yumoto
    the amiable thick-fried tofu,
    the non-conforming cabbage rolls...
[20:23] yumoto
    And chikuwabu!
[20:24] yumoto
    When they all come together,
    that's what you call oden!
[20:27] yumoto
    The world, the Earth... It's all oden, too!
[20:30] yumoto
    Oden is the Earth! You get it?
[20:34] ---
    Uh-huh.
[20:36] io
    He kind of forced it all to fit together, huh?
[20:38] ryuu
    I can't tell if that's too big or too small.
[20:42] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[20:52] monster
    What is this mysterious sensation?
[20:55] monster
    Comfort... Healing...
[20:57] monster
    I feel the universe soaking
    into me like a golden broth...
[21:00] monster
    I see... So this is love...
[21:07] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:09] four
    No, it's not!
[21:11] en
    Huh? What was that guy's name?
[21:13] en
    From the class next to ours...
[21:15] atsu
    I remember. He's kinda low-profile, but...
[21:18] en
    He looks clean and refreshed,
    like he just had a bath.
[21:20] ---
    Yeah.
[21:21] io
    While we're the ones who are a total mess.
[21:25] ryuu
    I reek of broth!
[21:26] yumoto
    When that happens,
    just hit up the Kurotama Bath!
[21:29] yumoto
    I have coupons!
[21:31] yumoto
    Oh, yeah!
[21:32] yumoto
    One for you, too!
[21:34] en
    Yeah, let's do that.
    A hot bath after a bloodbath.
[21:37] atsu
    Ugh, that pissed me off.
[21:39] io
    Me, too.
[21:39] ryuu
    Totally.
[21:40] wombat
    I'll join you!
[21:42] yumoto
    Come on over!
[21:43] atsu
    Say, why is Mr. Tawarayama
    carrying you everywhere?
[21:46] wombat
    If I get too far away from him...
[21:50] white
    Just who are they?
[21:53] light
    Has someone appeared to try to defy us?
[21:57] white
    No matter. This is well within our expectations.
[22:01] white
    Next time, the real battle will begin.
[22:05] hedgehog
    Prepare yourselves, Earth Conquest Club.
[22:08] white
    Yes, sir.
[23:40] yumoto
    Before we even realized what was happening,
[23:42] yumoto
    we ended up protecting the Earth!
[23:45] yumoto
    But I don't mind joining the Battle Lovers
    if it means I get to cuddle Wombat!
[23:50] yumoto
    Next time: Love Means Never Feeling Regret.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love Means Never Feeling Regret
[23:53] yumoto
    Love Making!

2 - Love Means Never Feeling Regret

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Love Means Never Feeling Regret
[01:36] kusatsu
    Arima. It's too soon.
[01:38] ari
    Really?
[01:39] ari
    I don't think one or two minutes
    makes a difference, myself...
[01:43] kusatsu
    Those who are negligent in etiquette
    will be negligent in all things.
[01:47] kusatsu
    Lifestyle, academics,
[01:49] kusatsu
    self-respect...
[01:51] ari
    Yes, yes. Whatever you say.
[01:55] gero
    President Kusatsu is as strict as ever.
[01:58] kusa
    Akoya, it is easy to drift downwards.
[02:01] kusa
    We, the student council of Binan High School,
[02:04] kusa
    regard foolishness and mediocrity as a sin.
[02:06] kusa
    We must not approve of it.
[02:08] gero
    Understood.
[02:09] arima
    Here you are. This is Seishodo's "White Dew."
[02:16] gero
    Arima-san, it's delicious.
[02:21] arima
    Glad to hear it.
[02:22] arima
    It was worth sending away for.
[02:25] zun
    Now, rulers of this blue world.
[02:28] zun
    Members of the noble Caerula Adamas.
[02:30] zun
    Let us begin the executive meeting of the
    Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms Project.
[02:35] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[02:37] all
    Of love!
[02:41] arima
    Why are their faces blurred out?
    Their voices are strange, too.
[02:45] kusa
    We haven't done anything to it.
[02:47] kusa
    It seems they scrambled the
    information themselves.
[02:50] yumoto
    Love is over!
[02:53] kusa
    Do you think they intend to interrupt our
    Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms Project,
[02:59] kusa
    Lord Zundar?
[03:00] zun
    The possibility exists.
[03:03] gero
    Does that mean they've been given
    the same technology we have?
[03:09] zun
    That voice and image filter is a product
    of highly advanced scientific technology.
[03:14] ari
    You mean that "voices have been changed
    in the interests of privacy" thing?
[03:19] zun
    It is on par with the scientific
    technology of my planet.
[03:23] kusa
    Planet Evil, you mean?
[03:25] zun
    Correct.
[03:27] zun
    If they do exist to oppose us,
    we will need to take caution.
[03:31] gero
    The things they wear and say
    have no style whatsoever.
[03:34] gero
    They can't possibly compete with us.
[03:36] gero
    Or should I say, I dislike even the
    idea of thinking them as equals.
[03:40] ari
    I suppose we should watch them for a while?
[03:42] zun
    If they appear next time, we will
    need to consider countermeasures.
[03:46] zun
    For now, let us move forward
    with the Earth Conquest Project.
[03:50] kusa
    Yes. The superior should rule and
    guide the world's development.
[03:54] kusa
    To this end, the foolish and the acts
    of barbarism they commit must be purged.
[03:59] ari
    That's quite the ambitious undertaking, I must say.
[04:02] kusa
    Well then, Arima...
[04:04] kusa
    The state of this Earth.
[04:05] kusa
    This city.
[04:07] kusa
    This school. Do you approve of it?
[04:10] kusa
    Base and vulgar.
[04:12] kusa
    Ignorant and incompetent.
[04:13] kusa
    Stupid and silly.
[04:16] kusa
    Should such students run
    rampant over Binan High School?
[04:19] ari
    Oh, well...
[04:23] ari
    I do think some degree of
    order might be necessary.
[04:26] kusa
    Which means we must first establish a
    model society in our immediate vicinity.
[04:31] kusa
    Namely...
[04:32] gero
    The Binan High School Conquest Project, right?
[04:36] gero
    I unilaterally agree with President Kusatsu.
[04:39] gero
    I don't want to look at ugly and dirty things.
[04:42] zun
    The inferior beings should fight with
    their fellows, and destroy themselves.
[04:48] kusa
    That's entirely logical.
[04:50] zun
    Then you should make use of the humans'
    short-tempered, violent natures.
[04:54] zun
    First, we need someone who
    can execute the operation.
[04:57] kusa
    Find someone to be our puppet,
    and act through them, right?
[05:02] zun
    Correct.
[05:04] zun
    Lend him just a bit of our power.
[05:07] zun
    Anger, hatred, jealousy...
[05:10] zun
    They burn more easily than dry leaves.
[05:14] kusa
    Understood, Lord Zundar.
[05:16] kusa
    Then let us find us our fool at once.
[05:19] zun
    Caerula Adamas, I leave this to you.
[05:22] all
    Sir!
[05:25] en
    Did you know?
[05:27] en
    People say it's not true
    that forests are disappearing
[05:30] en
    to make disposable chopsticks.
[05:32] ryu
    Where did that come from, Yufuin-senpai?
[05:35] en
    Disposable chopsticks are made from
    trees cut down to thin out forests,
[05:38] en
    so they're logical from an eco-friendly,
    recycling point of view.
[05:41] atsu
    I know that.
[05:43] en
    Well then, the phrase "boiled down"
[05:46] en
    originally referred to reaching a
    conclusion after a lengthy discussion.
[05:50] en
    Did you know that?
[05:51] atsu
    A crime of conscience or
    inappropriate laughter, right?
[05:53] yumoto
    Speaking of disposable
    chopsticks getting boiled down,
[05:55] yumoto
    my bro Gora taught me...
[05:56] yumoto
    "Menma is just recycled disposable chopsticks."
[05:59] ryu
    Wow, he's an idiot.
[06:01] yumoto
    But it's kinda like disposable chopsticks, isn't it?
[06:04] ryu
    It's just thin and rectangular, right?
[06:05] yumoto
    It's also crisp.
[06:07] ryu
    That doesn't mean it's chopsticks.
[06:09] ryu
    The crispiness comes from the
    bamboo it's made from.
[06:11] yumoto
    There are disposable chopsticks
    made from bamboo, too.
[06:13] ryu
    Are you that determined to
    say menma is chopsticks?
[06:16] yumoto
    What are you saying, Ryuu-senpai?
[06:18] yumoto
    Menma is menma.
[06:19] ryu
    You're the one who brought it up!
[06:21] io
    Anyway, can we talk about why
    Wombat appears to be dead now?
[06:26] yumoto
    I need one cuddle a day!
[06:29] atsu
    I have no idea why that deserves a thumbs up.
[06:31] yumoto
    What? It's the obvious compensation.
[06:34] atsu
    For what?
[06:35] yumoto
    You know, for the fight...
    The Love Busters thing.
[06:39] en
    Oh. Yeah.
[06:41] wombat
    It's not the Love Busters!
    It's the Battle Lovers!
[06:45] wombat
    At least try to remember your own name!
[06:49] en
    Love Battlers, Bust Lovers...
[06:52] en
    They're both embarrassing,
    so what's the difference?
[06:54] wombat
    Battle Lovers is a venerable and noble title!
[06:58] ryu
    Can't be, it's English.
[06:59] io
    At least be consistent about whether
    you're an alien or a foreigner.
[07:01] ryu
    So inconsistent.
[07:04] en
    Plus...
[07:05] en
    These things won't come off.
[07:08] wombat
    They're not "these things"!
    They're Lovracelets!
[07:12] atsu
    Yeah.
[07:13] atsu
    The inability to remember proper names
    means you're getting old, you know.
[07:17] en
    Seriously? Is it bad?
[07:20] io
    It's bad, Yufuin-senpai.
[07:22] io
    Trying to have a conversation on nothing but
    "these things," "those things," and "that thing"
[07:25] io
    definitely means you're getting old.
[07:27] ryu
    So, there's one person here
    who hasn't said a single word,
[07:30] ryu
    let alone a proper name.
[07:36] ryu
    Mr. Tawarayama there.
[07:38] wombat
    No! He'll rot!
[07:41] tawara
    Now you need not worry.
[07:43] all
    No, no, no...
[07:44] ryu
    "Need not" in this day and age...
[07:46] io
    What did you mean, "rot"?
[07:47] wombat
    What I mean is, if I get too far away,
[07:51] wombat
    this body's cellular metabolism will cease and...
[07:54] yumoto
    You mean he's dead?
[07:56] wombat
    In your planet's terms.
[07:59] en
    That's a corpse?
[08:00] atsu
    Dead? So you killed him?
[08:01] ryu
    Murderer!
[08:02] io
    That's a crime.
[08:05] yumoto
    Cold?
[08:06] atsu
    I don't know how you can touch him, Yumoto.
[08:08] yumoto
    Yeah? But he's not that cold!
[08:10] io
    But he's dead!
[08:10] ryu
    Liar!
[08:11] wombat
    Wait a minute.
[08:13] wombat
    This individual is dead, but he is also alive.
[08:17] atsu
    What's with the Schrödinger reference?
[08:19] wombat
    No, it's true!
[08:22] en
    This is starting to annoy me.
[08:24] tawara
    I shall describe my current ability to
    function independently as "difficult."
[08:30] io
    That old man speak is really irritating me.
[08:33] ryu
    You've got our teacher's character all wrong.
[08:35] atsu
    He seriously seems possessed.
[08:37] tawara
    I am currently in stasis,
    but I shall recover shortly.
[08:42] atsu
    Even though you're dead?
[08:43] tawara
    Scientifically advanced medical mechanisms
    are currently at work in my body.
[08:47] tawara
    You need not worry.
[08:49] en
    Easier said than done.
[08:51] wombat
    As long as I am within a certain range,
    his life will not be in danger.
[08:55] wombat
    You know the saying.
[08:56] wombat
    We are "living jointly"!
[08:59] atsu
    I don't know where you pulled that one from...
[09:01] io
    Putting off dealing with problems
    is called the Concorde Effect.
[09:04] io
    It just increases your debt.
[09:06] ryu
    Besides, you can't say you love Earth
    when you killed someone on it.
[09:09] wombat
    There was a reason for that!
[09:11] atsu
    What's the reason?
[09:12] wombat
    It happened the other day,
    just after I arrived on Earth!
[09:16] wombat
    When I was expressing my admiration
[09:19] wombat
    for the generous character and
    clean habits of the people of Earth!
[09:23] atsu
    Does he mean the public bath?
[09:24] yumoto
    It's us!
[09:26] yumoto
    The Kurotama Bath is always open for business!
[09:28] wombat
    But then I was chased around by
    an extremely belligerent individual!
[09:32] yumoto
    Huh? Who was that?
[09:34] yumoto
    Me?!
[09:35] both
    Ah.
[09:37] wombat
    In order to escape his relentless pursuit,
[09:40] wombat
    I had no choice but to run with all my might!
[09:43] wombat
    Help me!
[10:06] en
    You did it, huh?
[10:07] atsu
    You sure did it.
[10:08] io
    You did it, all right.
[10:09] ryu
    Really did it.
[10:12] wombat
    Y-Yes, but...
[10:13] wombat
    Is the responsibility truly mine alone to bear?
[10:17] yumoto
    What? Me?
[10:18] io
    Well, given the force he was
    about to get cuddled with,
[10:22] io
    maybe he was right to run.
[10:24] ryu
    "Sekuhara"? No, you'd call it "anihara," right?
[10:26] atsu
    Animal harassment, yeah.
[10:29] yumoto
    I get it.
[10:31] yumoto
    In that case, Wombat, cuddle me!
[10:34] yumoto
    As much as you like.
[10:35] yumoto
    Do it to your heart's content!
[10:37] wombat
    I refuse!
[10:38] yumoto
    Why?!
[10:39] wombat
    I don't want cuddles, I want you
    to work as the Battle Lovers!
[10:43] wombat
    What I want more than anything
    is for you to love the Earth!
[10:46] yumoto
    But you can just love me!
[10:49] en
    Question.
[10:51] en
    You mean we'll have to put on
    those weird costumes again?
[10:54] atsu
    More than the costumes, I disliked
    those grandiose introductory speeches.
[10:57] ryu
    If it were just the costume...
[10:59] io
    What? "If"? You mean you'd be fine
    if it was just the costume?
[11:02] ryu
    If I think of it as cosplay, it's totally fine.
[11:05] ryu
    We can fire beams, too!
[11:06] io
    Now that you mention it...
[11:08] yumoto
    Well, if my cute li'l Wombat
    asks it of me, I'll take it on!
[11:12] en
    Hold on a minute.
[11:14] en
    Can you really take something
    like this on that easily?
[11:16] atsu
    And how long will we have to do it?
[11:18] wombat
    Until the Earth is filled with love, naturally!
[11:23] en
    You're so creepy.
[11:25] io
    Love? What's that?
[11:27] ryu
    It's like, being happy, right?
[11:29] ryu
    Like me. Or me.
[11:31] io
    Just you, huh, Ryuu?
[11:33] ryu
    I think love is found in the
    trivial, realistic moments.
[11:36] ryu
    Like sharing a can of coffee with a girl,
[11:39] ryu
    or when your shoulders brush
    when the train shakes!
[11:42] io
    I bet I'll feel love when I get
    one billion in my Cayman Islands account.
SIGN    One Billion
[11:46] ryu
    Talk about corrupt!
[11:47] atsu
    It's fine that everyone has
    his own definition of love.
[11:50] atsu
    But are you okay with having
     to wear embarrassing costumes,
[11:53] atsu
    say embarrassing lines,
    and do embarrassing things
[11:55] atsu
    for the foreseeable future?
[11:57] wombat
    I told you, it's nothing
    to be embarrassed about!
[12:00] en
    By the way...
[12:02] en
    Is it okay for you to be away
    from Mr. Tawarayama right now?
[12:06] tawara
    It is fine.
[12:08] en
    Freezing and thawing something over
    and over makes it brittle, y'know?
[12:12] atsu
    You need to take care with perishables.
[12:14] yumoto
    Like sell-by dates.
[12:15] wombat
    I'm sorry!
[12:17] yumoto
    It's okay. I don't mind it so much.
[12:19] four
    You should mind!
SIGN    Yufuin En
    Born July 2nd
    Blood Type B / Cancer
    Hobby: Napping
    Likes: Sleeping in, hot spring manju
SIGN    On sale this week New menu item!
SIGN    Chicken Cutlet Curry Tanmen
[12:32] kusa
    Now then...
[12:34] kusa
    That stench...
[12:36] gero
    What's wrong?
[12:37] ari
    Kinshiro hates curry to death.
SIGN    Hashida Wario
[12:44] hashi
    My name is Hashida Wario.
[12:47] hashi
    I like a world of order and rules.
[12:51] hashi
    The thing I hate most is pi.
[12:53] hashi
    Because it doesn't divide evenly.
[12:55] hashi
    On that note, I also hate
    families with three children.
[12:57] hashi
    When parents and grandparents get
    together for birthdays and Christmas
[13:00] hashi
    and you have seven people sharing a cake...
[13:04] hashi
    It's unbearable.
[13:06] hashi
    It would be better if the
    grandparents would just...
[13:12] zun
    He is the one.
[13:14] kusa
    Why?
[13:15] zun
    His narrow-minded heart that permits
    no compromise will create a raging flame.
[13:20] kusa
    Yes, Lord Zundar.
[13:26] kusa
    Conquest!
[13:33] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
[13:35] kusa
    Aurite!
[13:39] ari
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[13:42] ari
    Argent!
[13:47] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[13:50] gero
    Perlite!
[13:52] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[13:55] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[13:57] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[14:02] kusa
    Aurum!
[14:04] ari
    Argentum!
[14:06] gero
    Perla!
[14:10] trio
    Donum!
[14:33] wari
    That which is not evenly divisible!
[14:34] wari
    That which is warped!
    That which is not equal!
[14:37] wari
    Multiply further!
[14:38] wari
    Warp this world and destroy it!
[14:42] wari
    Asymmetry Beam, fire!
[14:53] guy
    Hey!
[14:54] guy
    Move your hand!
[14:55] guy
    I can't get to the chopsticks!
[14:57] guy
    That's your fault!
[15:04] ari
    Are mismatched chopsticks really
    enough to start a fight like this?
[15:08] gero
    It really is fighting and self-destruction.
[15:10] kusa
    Their own foolishness is to blame.
[15:15] en
    The Lovracelet's reacting,
[15:17] en
    but there's no need for all of us to go, right?
[15:19] en
    I'm taking today off.
[15:21] ryuu
    You mean it, Yufuin-senpai?
[15:23] atsu
    Roger that. If we're short on
    people, we might call you, though.
[15:26] io
    Okay, permission given.
[15:28] wombat
    Hey! Wait just one minute!
[15:31] wombat
    Since ancient times, there have always
    been five heirs to the throne of love!
[15:35] yumoto
    What, really?
[15:36] wombat
    I can't allow you to reduce and
    revert their numbers so lightly!
[15:41] en
    What? Sounds like a pain.
[15:43] wombat
    Why do you think I went to all that trouble
[15:45] wombat
    of thinking up five introductory speeches?!
[15:48] atsu
    What, you thought up those lines?
[15:50] ryuu
    No wonder I thought they had no style.
[15:53] wombat
    But I spent a whole week thinking them up...
[15:56] ryuu
    They have no style.
[15:57] wombat
    You said it twice!
[15:59] yumoto
    Well, I think it's best if all five of us go.
[16:02] wombat
    See? See? See?!
[16:04] en
    How come?
[16:05] yumoto
    Just a feeling, I guess.
[16:06] yumoto
    Or maybe I just like odd numbers
     better than even ones!
[16:11] atsu
    That's a more unintelligible
    reason than I was expecting.
[16:14] yumoto
    And we already went out together once!
[16:16] ryuu
    It's true that it feels more complete that way.
[16:18] io
    And you like that outfit, right, Ryuu?
[16:22] ryuu
    It really does look good on me...
[16:23] wombat
    I don't care! Just, please, get out there!
[16:27] en
    Guess I don't have a choice.
[16:29] en
    Might as well go.
[16:30] wombat
    Then Love Making into the
    Battle Lovers right now!
[16:37] yumoto
    Love Making!
[16:41] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[16:43] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[16:45] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[16:46] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[16:48] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[16:50] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[16:52] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[16:53] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[16:55] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[16:57] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[17:00] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[17:03] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[17:06] io
    Love is all!
[17:08] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[17:10] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:13] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:15] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[17:17] five
    Of love!
[17:20] wari
    Disorderly things!
[17:21] wari
    Inadequate things! Superfluous things!
[17:23] wari
    Destroy them all this instant!
[17:26] yumoto
    Wait!
[17:28] yumoto
    We're gonna defeat you!
[17:29] wari
    What?
[17:30] ryu
    That's too abridged!
[17:31] yumoto
    But we already introduced ourselves before!
[17:34] en
    I want to go home already,
    so let's get this done.
[17:37] io
    That's a careless line no hero should say.
[17:39] io
    You're amazing, Yufuin-senpai.
[17:39] guy
    What the heck?
[17:40] guy
    "Defeat you"?
[17:42] guy
    How embarrassing.
[17:44] yufuin
    They're right to react like that.
[17:46] atsu
    Hey, do they recognize us?
[17:48] wombat
    Worry not!
[17:50] wombat
    Your images and voices have been altered
    to protect your personal information.
SIGN    *Image and voices have been altered to protect privacy
[17:54] en
    They'll still recognize us if we use our real names.
[17:56] en
    For now, I'm Cerulean!
[17:58] en
    Take this!
[18:02] wari
    Hey, that was dangerous!
[18:05] yumoto
    Yu— Cerulean-senpai's really into it!
[18:08] en
    I told you, I want to get home.
[18:10] wari
    Five! An indivisible number!
[18:13] wari
    Then I will erase you!
[18:15] atsu
    What was that?
[18:17] wari
    The world must be beautifully
    symmetrical and even!
[18:20] ryuu
    What are you talking about?
[18:25] ryuu
    You mean, you don't like this kind of thing?
[18:28] wari
    Are you stupid?!
[18:30] wari
    Don't show me that thing!
[18:40] yumoto
    Senpai!
[18:45] yumoto
    What'd you do that for?!
[18:47] wari
    I will destroy warped things
    and incomplete sets!
[18:51] yumoto
    Why?
[18:52] yumoto
    What's wrong with disposable chopsticks?
[18:58] atsu
    The splinters!
[19:00] atsu
    The splinters from the
    chopsticks got Yu— got Scarlet!
[19:03] en
    Those things really hurt.
[19:18] yumoto
    This thing's making rattling noises!
[19:19] wari
    A mass of chopsticks acts as my armor,
[19:23] wari
    rendering your attacks useless!
[19:30] wari
    The finish!
[19:34] yumoto
    If you hate disposable chopsticks that much,
[19:36] yumoto
    don't use them to protect yourself!
[19:40] yumoto
    Just bring your own chopsticks!
[19:43] yumoto
    These irregular chopsticks you're trying to
    destroy have a great purpose behind them!
[19:48] wari
    Purpose?!
[19:50] yumoto
    I'm talking about...
[19:52] yumoto
    A child's rifle!
[19:53] wari
    Ch-Child's rifle?!
[19:56] yumoto
    Can something so cool exist
    in this world? No, it can't!
[19:59] wari
    A rhetorical question?!
[20:02] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[20:10] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[20:13] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[20:15] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[20:18] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[20:20] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[20:35] all
    Love Attack!
[20:49] yumoto
    Your inability to see disposable chopsticks
    as anything but chopsticks was your downfall.
[20:52] yumoto
    Wash your used chopsticks and use them again!
[20:55] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[21:04] wari
    What is this sensation?
[21:06] wari
    Comfort... Healing...
[21:07] wari
    So this is love...
[21:14] hashi
    Eco-friendly...
[21:17] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:19] four
    We told you, it's not!
[21:21] ryuu
    Well, whatever.
[21:24] kusa
    One thing has become very clear.
[21:28] kusa
    They are our enemies.
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:36] gora
    Yumoto. How's the bath?
[21:39] yumoto
    Just perfect, Gora.
[21:41] en
    As I thought, there was no
    need for all five of us.
[21:43] atsu
    Yumoto just handled it all by himself.
    With the force of a storm.
[21:47] ryuu
    I never got to show off.
[21:48] wombat
    Try harder next time.
[21:51] ryuu
    That pisses me off! What's your
    problem, you overgrown rodent?
[21:53] wombat
    I am not a rodent!
[21:56] io
    He's a marsupial.
[21:56] wombat
    What are you saying?!
[21:59] yumoto
    Huh?
[22:00] yumoto
    Will Mr. Tawaramura be okay
    in hot water like this?
[22:04] wombat
    Ah, wait...
[23:41] en
    A pretty boy contest at an all-boys' school?
[23:43] en
    There's something wrong with this place.
[23:45] en
    But the Ballet Club advisor,
    Kurotori, is really pushing for it.
[23:49] en
    Ugh, what a pain.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Feel Love, Narcissus!
[23:50] en
    Next time: Feel Love, Narcissus!
[23:52] en
    Love Making!

3 - Feel Love, Narcissus!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Tradition! Binan High School
    Pretty Boy Contest
SIGN    Beautiful, Proper, Pure
SIGN    The 27th of Every Month is Pretty Boy Day
[00:08] kuro
    My name is Kurotori Moteo.
[00:11] kuro
    Advisor to Binan High School's Ballet Club.
[00:13] kuro
    Likes: Being popular.
[00:16] kuro
    Dislikes: Heaviness.
SIGN    Kurotori Moteo
[00:18] kuro
    It carries no weight with the ladies.
[00:19] kuro
    This month, at last...
[00:22] kuro
    I will take the crown of Binan
    High School's #1 Pretty Boy!
[00:40] en
    I saw nothing.
[00:42] atsu
    Let's say we saw nothing.
[00:43] en
    That's just what he wants.
[00:45] yumoto
    How come?
[00:46] yumoto
    You could see Mr. Kurotori's entire—
[00:49] en
    It's fine for you! You're the bath attendant.
[00:52] atsu
    Since it's something we didn't want to see,
[00:55] atsu
    we want to say we didn't see it!
[00:57] yumoto
    Huh? Why didn't you want
    to see Mr. Kurotori's—
[01:01] atsu
    There's no reason!
[01:02] en
    Most people wouldn't want to see that.
[01:04] yumoto
    What's wrong with hanging out naked?
[01:06] yumoto
    I love it. Seeing it and showing it!
[01:10] kuro
    Hello there.
[01:12] kuro
    My sweet honeys.
[01:14] kuro
    Pardon me for going on ahead.
[01:17] atsu
    G-Goodbye.
[01:19] yumoto
    Thanks for coming!
[01:21] kuro
    Spin, spin, spin!
[01:23] kuro
    Spin, spin, spin!
SIGN    Feel Love, Narcissus!
[03:01] en
    Oh? That had to be on purpose, right?
[03:04] atsu
    Yeah.
[03:05] en
    Did you know?
[03:06] en
    They say that hiring him for
    our school was an accident.
[03:11] atsu
    Mr. Kurotori?
[03:12] en
    Yeah. Apparently the principal
    wanted a volleyball club advisor,
[03:17] en
    but he accidentally hired a
    ballet dance club advisor.
[03:21] atsu
    That seems too stupid to be true.
[03:23] en
    But this is a principal who
    holds monthly pretty boy contests
[03:26] en
    even though it's an all-boys' school.
[03:29] atsu
    Now that you mention it,
    I suppose it is possible...
[03:33] en
    But why hold a pretty boy
    contest at an all-boys' school?
[03:36] atsu
    Maybe it's because there are only boys here?
[03:40] ryuu
    Huh? The Ballet Club?
[03:42] kuro
    You are the chosen students.
SIGN    Ballet Club
[03:44] kuro
    Because you both caught my eye.
[03:47] kuro
    Well? Won't you arabesque with me?
[03:52] io
    Is there a financial advantage
    to be gained from this?
[03:55] kuro
    One can expect profits from
    recital entrance fees and,
[03:57] kuro
    if one becomes a star, profits
    from sales of merchandise.
[04:01] io
    Merchandise, eh?
[04:03] ryuu
    How do girls like it?
[04:06] kuro
    It's no exaggeration to say that
    90% of ballet fans are women.
[04:10] kuro
    I await a positive response from you both.
[04:14] gero
    That's the Ballet Club advisor, Kurotori.
[04:17] gero
    He's been pestering me to join, too.
[04:20] kusa
    I heard that his club
    doesn't have a single member.
[04:24] kuso
    If this keeps up, we will be
    forced to shut his club down.
[04:28] ari
    But Kurotori's goal probably isn't
    to gain more club members.
[04:32] ari
    It's to gain more fans.
[04:36] kusa
    Disciples to give him votes
    in the pretty boy contest, eh?
[04:44] io
    In terms of cost-effectiveness,
    the Ballet Club isn't a very good prospect.
[04:47] ryuu
    You decided to calculate it?
[04:49] io
    You never know where you might find gold.
[04:52] io
    Would you ever join the Ballet Club, Ryuu?
[04:55] ryuu
    Nah.
[04:56] ryuu
    He said 90% of ballet fans are girls,
[05:00] ryuu
    but the people around me
    are 100% girls, all the time.
[05:03] ryuu
    So if I did ballet, my ratio
    would actually go down.
[05:05] io
    Even if the ratio went down,
    the overall parameters would go up...
[05:09] io
    But I won't bother talking to you about numbers.
[05:11] ryuu
    Well, all I know is...
[05:13] io
    Money is...
[05:14] ryuu
    Women are...
[05:15] both
    Life!
[05:16] boy
    Zaou-kun, Naruko-kun.
[05:18] boy
    Here are the voting forms
    for the pretty boy contest.
[05:21] boy
    Put them in the voting box as usual.
[05:24] io
    What an annoyance.
    I can't make a single yen off this.
[05:27] ryuu
    And if I don't take #1,
    the girls will throw a fit.
[05:31] gero
    You've never taken #1.
[05:35] ryuu
    What are you looking at?
[05:37] gero
    I could ask you the same.
[05:38] gero
    You can't seem to take your eyes off me.
[05:41] ryuu
    What are you talking about?
[05:48] kuro
    Heading that way, my sweet honey?
[05:51] kuro
    Why not celebrate youth in the Ballet Club?
[05:57] yumoto
    That paper's great!
[05:59] kuro
    Read the reverse side closely, too.
SIGN    Binan High School Pretty Boy Contest
    
    
    Prince of Black Swannie
SIGN    Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori
[06:02] kuro
    Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori.
[06:05] yumoto
    This paper sure is great!
[06:07] kuro
    The paper?
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[06:10] yumoto
    Basketball Club, go!
[06:16] yumoto
    Now, the Ballet Club! Go!
[06:21] yumoto
    Wow!
[06:22] yumoto
    I knew it! The Ballet Club wins by a long shot!
[06:26] io
    He seems to have spent a lot of money
    on good paper for his pamphlets.
[06:30] ryuu
    Lousy taste, though.
[06:32] en
    What are you doing, Yumoto?
[06:34] atsu
    Looks like he's deciding which club to join,
[06:37] atsu
    based on paper airplane distance.
[06:39] wombat
    That's horrible!
[06:40] yumoto
    What is?
[06:41] wombat
    You are already in a club-paparazzi!
[06:44] yumoto
    Huh?
[06:45] wombat
    Our "Defenders of Love Earth Defense Club"!
[06:48] en
    Don't just name it without asking.
[06:50] atsu
    And you're saying
    authoritatively that it's a club?
[06:52] wombat
    I submitted the application with
    Tawarayama-san as the advisor.
[06:56] yumoto
    But monsters don't attack every day.
[06:59] yumoto
    I'm bored.
[07:00] wombat
    That's no reason to two-time me!
[07:03] wombat
    You play with me and cuddle
    me every day, and yet...
[07:06] yumoto
    But you only let me cuddle you once a day.
[07:11] en
    Yumoto really is formidable.
[07:13] ---
    Yeah.
[07:14] ryuu
    Speaking of which, this pretty boy contest...
SIGN    Binan High School Pretty Boy Contest
    
    
    Prince of Black Swannie
SIGN    Cast a pure vote for Prince Kurotori
[07:17] ryuu
    When is it again?
SIGN    Pretty Boy Day
    27th (bi-nan-shi)
[07:18] io
    Every month on the 27th.
[07:20] io
    "Binanshi" means Pretty Boy Day.
[07:22] en
    Isn't "27" more like "two-na,"
    which makes "Tuna" Day?
[07:25] ryuu
    Not like I care, but the one thing
    I can't stand is losing to that Gero guy.
[07:29] yumoto
    Why is that?
[07:30] en
    Did you actually have a rivalry going?
[07:32] io
    Mildly so.
[07:34] atsu
    Now that you mention it, last month,
    Ryuu and Gero tied for 3rd place.
[07:38] atsu
    With Kusatsu at #1 and Arima at #2.
[07:41] ryuu
    I bet the student council members
    got whole groups to vote for them!
[07:44] ryuu
    The point is, I'm knocking Gero out.
[07:47] en
    Sounds fun.
[07:49] yumoto
    Huh? How so?
[07:50] en
    A battle between the Earth
    Defense Club's "#1 Hustler" Zaou
[07:54] en
    vs. the student council's
    "Chief Narcissist" Gero.
[07:57] atsu
    You're bored too, huh, En-chan?
[07:59] en
    Thus, I call a strategy meeting to
    figure out how to bring Ryuu victory.
[08:02] [SONG] sign
    What is POPULARITY?
[08:03] en
    Here's the topic for debate.
[08:04] atsu
    There? We're starting from there?
[08:07] en
    It's not attractive to achieve
    only superficial popularity.
[08:10] en
    To achieve true popularity,
    one must discover its essence.
[08:14] ryuu
    Is this really going to make me #1?
[08:17] wombat
    I have a question, as well.
[08:19] wombat
    This is an all-boys' school.
[08:21] wombat
    Is it acceptable that "popularity" in
    this case refers to popularity with boys?
[08:25] en
    It is.
[08:26] atsu
    It is?
[08:27] yumoto
    Huh? We're thinking of ways
    to get popular with boys?
[08:31] yumoto
    Putting all our heads together?
[08:33] en
    It's for Ryuu's sake.
[08:34] io
    Even if it won't earn me a single yen,
[08:36] io
    I suppose I must, if it's for Ryuu's sake.
[08:39] yumoto
    Huh? Seriously?
[08:41] yumoto
    If you're gonna be popular, wouldn't
    it be better to be popular with girls?
[08:45] en
    You're so naïve, Yumoto.
[08:47] en
    To be frank, there's no point
    in being popular with girls.
[08:49] yumoto
    Why not?
[08:51] en
    Girls are to be admired.
[08:53] ryuu
    You mean love them,
    rather than be loved by them?
[08:55] atsu
    They do say that men are
    more admiring of manly traits.
[08:59] en
    That's right.
[09:00] en
    They also say that women betray,
    but men do not.
[09:04] io
    Although money is even more loyal.
[09:07] en
    The point is, there's value
    in being a man loved by men!
[09:10] atsu
    He said it outright!
[09:11] yumoto
    Oh! But now that you mention it,
    when I watch yakuza flicks,
[09:15] yumoto
    my heart always flutters at the
    sight of a young gang leader.
[09:18] atsu
    Did you just come out?!
[09:19] en
    Okay. Now that we have the
    definition of popularity,
[09:22] en
    our next subject is "approach."
[09:24] en
    How do you get popular
    with men? Think about it!
[09:26] ---
    Yeah!
[09:28] wombat
    What are they so fired up for?
[09:32] [SONG] sign
    [Requirements to be popular with men]
[09:32] [SONG] sign
    1. Strength
    
    2. Money
    
    3. Brotherliness
[09:33] en
    We've solidified the popularity requirements.
[09:36] atsu
    The #1 requirement
    being strength is realistic.
[09:39] ryuu
    #3 being brotherliness is realistic, too.
[09:42] io
    Money is important, too.
[09:44] wombat
    You got tired of it, did you?
[09:47] yumoto
    Yeah, 'cause I hate thinking.
[09:50] en
    Okay. Let's put our approach
    into practice, and see
[09:55] en
    if it produces results!
[09:56] all
    Yeah!
[09:57] wombat
    Oh, if only they'd be so passionately
    macho about being the Battle Lovers!
[10:11] atsu
    En-chan. Can you do this?
[10:12] atsu
    That guy looks strong.
[10:14] en
    No problem. First...
[10:16] en
    You kill with the eyes!
[10:17] atsu
    Not with strength?
[10:23] atsu
    Ready...
[10:24] atsu
    Go!
[10:28] yumoto
    Senpai! Go over the top!
[10:31] en
    Yeah!
[10:33] en
    Over... the... top!
[10:43] atsu
    Winner: Yufuin!
[10:45] en
    All right!
[10:55] io
    Hey. What do you think of me?
[10:58] boy
    What?
[10:59] io
    I'm asking what you think of me.
[11:01] boy
    Well... Nothing in particular...
[11:03] io
    What about now?
SIGN    Account Balance
[11:12] boy
    I-Incredible!
[11:15] boy
    It's incredible!
[11:17] en
    He's fallen.
[11:18] yumoto
    The power of money is incredible!
SIGN    Class 1-A
[11:28] ryuu
    Working hard?
[11:32] boy
    Can we help you?
[11:34] ryuu
    You're triplets, right?
[11:35] boy
    Yes. As you can see.
[11:37] ryuu
    You want a big brother?
[11:39] trio
    Huh?
[11:40] en
    That came out of nowhere.
[11:41] atsu
    Well, let's watch to the end.
[11:49] ryuu
    You enjoy this cleaning stuff?
[11:52] boy
    We don't enjoy it...
[11:54] boy
    But we're on duty, so...
[11:55] boy
    We have to do it...
[11:57] ryuu
    Then... I'll make it so you can't!
[12:14] trio
    H-Huh?!
[12:17] ryuu
    Now you can't clean, right?
[12:20] ryuu
    It wasn't your fault.
[12:22] ryuu
    Let's hang. Come on.
[12:27] trio
    Big brother!
[12:28] boy
    Big brother!
[12:30] boy
    Let me call you big brother!
[12:32] boy
    Big brother!
[12:34] atsu
    He seized the hearts of the triplets?!
[12:37] yumoto
    Cool!
[12:39] ari
    Those idiots are up to something again.
[12:42] gero
    It's not at all beautiful, is it?
[12:44] kusa
    Things are drifting downwards. Let's go.
SIGN    Kinugawa Atsushi
    Born October 5th
    Blood Type A / Libra
    Hobby: Jigsaw Puzzles
    Likes: Baths, hot springs, curry
SIGN    Mr. Kurotori Rally
[13:01] kuro
    Why? Why did no one come?!
[13:05] kuro
    After I made such a grand showing
    at the arm wrestling tournament...
[13:10] kuro
    If this continues, my position of
    #1 pretty boy in Binan High School
[13:14] kuro
    will once again be taken
    by the student council...
[13:16] kuro
    No, by the dark horse,
    the Earth Defense Club!
[13:21] kuro
    Ah...
[13:22] kuro
    They should all revere me,
    honor me, love me! Why?!
[13:26] kuro
    Why?!
[13:28] zun
    He may be a suitable servant.
[13:31] kusa
    Yes, Lord Zundar.
[13:33] zun
    Go, Caerula Adamas!
[13:40] kusa
    Conquest!
[13:43] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[13:45] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[13:48] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[13:54] kusa
    Aurum!
[13:55] ari
    Argentum!
[13:56] gero
    Perla!
[14:01] trio
    Donum!
SIGN    1579th Pretty Boy Contest
[14:15] boy
    Today's the day to vote
    in the pretty boy contest!
[14:18] boy
    Please cast your pure,
    proper, beautiful votes!
[14:22] en
    We've done all we can.
[14:24] en
    Now we wait for the
    proclamation from on high.
[14:26] atsu
    We have?
[14:29] wrestler
    I'm voting for you.
[14:31] en
    Right.
[14:32] boy
    I'll put in for you, Naruko-kun.
[14:33] io
    Thanks.
[14:34] trio
    Big brother! We're gonna vote for you!
[14:37] ryuu
    Let's play again sometime.
[14:38] trio
    Eee!
[14:40] yumoto
    Big brother.
[14:42] ryuu
    Shut up.
SIGN    Pretty Boy Contest
[14:45] ann
    Now, the man who will
    shine as honored king
[14:49] ann
    of the 1579th Binan High School
    Pretty Boy Contest is...
[14:56] ann
    The name is...
[14:59] monster
    It's me!
[15:02] monster
    Swan! Swan!
[15:05] boy
    What's that thing?!
[15:09] yumoto
    Hey! A monster appeared!
[15:11] ryuu
    Why now, of all times?!
[15:13] io
    I have money riding on this,
    so I'd rather it not be ruined.
[15:16] atsu
    What should we do?
[15:17] en
    What a pain.
[15:18] monster
    Everyone! Love me!
[15:21] monster
    Love Feather Storm!
[15:25] boy
    I love the guy with the black wings!
[15:27] boy
    I love you!
[15:32] yumoto
    Gross!
[15:33] wombat
    Don't freak out! Fight!
[15:36] ryuu
    What was that move, anyway?
[15:38] io
    It's pretty idiotic.
[15:39] atsu
    Part of me wants to applaud
    the opponent's cleverness, but...
[15:44] zun
    You see?
[15:45] zun
    With this plan, we will create
    a world where boys love boys,
[15:48] zun
    thus allowing no one to create any progeny!
[15:51] zun
    Now, the Earth will fall to ruin.
[15:53] zun
    What will you do, Battle Lovers?!
[15:56] wombat
    Hey!
[15:57] wombat
    Would you get to the Love Making already?!
[16:01] yumoto
    That's right! We can Love Making!
[16:03] en
    Oh, we're doing that again?
[16:06] yumoto
    Love Making!
[16:33] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[16:35] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[16:37] en
    Love Making.
[16:48] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[16:49] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[16:52] atsu
    Love Making.
[17:02] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[17:03] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[17:07] oi
    Love Making.
[17:16] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[17:18] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:21] ryuu
    Love Making!
[17:31] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[17:33] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[17:36] monster
    What?!
[17:38] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[17:40] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[17:43] io
    Love is all!
[17:45] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[17:48] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:50] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:52] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[17:55] five
    Of love!
[17:57] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[18:01] monster
    I'm glad to see you, Battle Lovers!
[18:04] yumoto
    What?!
[18:04] monster
    Now, love me to your heart's content!
[18:08] monster
    Love Feather Splash!
[18:11] all
    Ow! Ouch!
[18:16] monster
    Once you've been pierced by
    my love feathers, it's over!
[18:18] monster
    No one can resist loving me!
[18:21] monster
    Come on! Gimme a hug!
[18:24] ryuu
    Damn! I wanna hug it!
[18:26] io
    I'll pay money for it!
[18:27] en
    I want to marry it.
[18:31] atsu
    I can't take it! I'll be right back!
[18:33] ryuu
    He ran off without us!
[18:35] en
    I never realized he was that kind of guy.
[18:41] yumoto
    Wow! You flew, Senpai!
[18:47] atsu
    You, with your beautiful wings...
[18:50] atsu
    Let me show you the love
    that burns within me...
[18:52] ryuu
    Hold it!
[18:54] io
    I've got more money than him!
[18:56] en
    I have marriage on my mind!
[18:58] ryuu
    I love you!
[18:59] io
    I love you!
[18:59] en
    I love you!
[19:00] atsu
    I love you!
[19:03] monster
    That's perfect! More love!
    Offer me all your love!
[19:07] yumoto
    Darn it, these guys!
[19:12] yumoto
    Senpai! You're humiliating yourself!
[19:14] monster
    Don't interfere!
[19:16] monster
    They love me!
[19:18] monster
    Why don't you love me, too?
[19:21] monster
    I hit you with my love feather!
[19:24] yumoto
    I don't understand that kinda thing.
[19:26] monster
    In that case...
[19:28] monster
    What about now?!
[19:33] yumoto
    Why do you want to be loved so badly?
[19:36] monster
    Why...?
[19:38] yumoto
    You've never loved anyone, have you?
[19:41] yumoto
    I think loving feels way
    better than being loved.
[19:45] yumoto
    You can cuddle, and it feels really great!
[19:48] monster
    Cuddle?
[19:50] yumoto
    Yeah, cuddle!
[19:51] yumoto
    And if there's no one you love right now,
[19:53] yumoto
    you should try cuddling yourself!
[19:56] yumoto
    It feels great!
[19:58] en
    What is he talking about?
[20:00] atsu
    I don't know, but it's very passionate.
[20:03] yumoto
    Before you try to get anyone to love you,
[20:06] yumoto
    try loving yourself first.
[20:08] en
    Is now... our chance?
[20:10] atsu
    Now!
[20:12] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[20:15] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[20:17] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[20:20] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[20:22] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[20:37] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[20:49] monster
    How could I not realize
    something so important?!
[20:52] monster
    He's right! How can you live
    without loving yourself?
[20:56] monster
    The one you should love... is yourself!
[20:59] yumoto
    That's right!
[21:00] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[21:08] monster
    I love me!
[21:16] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:18] yumoto
    The monster was Mr. Kurotori?
[21:22] ryuu
    He looks happy, though.
[21:25] io
    Yes, he looks comfortable.
[21:28] en
    I'm tired.
[21:34] ari
    We lost again.
[21:35] gero
    The Battle Lovers... Just who are they?
[21:39] kusa
    We will surely have them grovel at our feet.
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:49] gora
    Yumoto. How's the water today?
[21:53] yumoto
    Perfect again today, Gora.
[21:57] en
    Hey, random question.
[21:59] en
    Which part do you guys wash first?
[22:02] atsu
    My neck, I guess?
[22:03] yumoto
    My arms!
[22:04] ryuu
    Armpits.
[22:05] io
    The nape of the neck.
[23:40] atsu
    That reminds me. When we
    were in elementary school,
[23:42] atsu
    we went to see a meteor shower.
[23:44] atsu
    I wish we could be kids again.
[23:46] atsu
    Wait, we are kids again!
[23:48] atsu
    Could a monster be behind this?
[23:50] atsu
    Next time: Cute Little
    Boys of Love and Youth.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth
[23:53] atsu
    Love Making!

4 - Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:10] atsu
    Hey, there's one!
[00:13] kusa
    There's another!
[00:15] atsu
    Meteor showers are cool, huh?
[00:17] kusa
    Yeah.
[00:22] atsu
    Hey. My big sister said that
[00:24] atsu
    if you make a wish three times
    before a shooting star disappears,
[00:28] atsu
    it'll come true.
[00:30] kusa
    Isn't that just superstition?
[00:31] atsu
    You think so?
[00:33] atsu
    But my sister really believes it.
[00:39] kusa
    What did you say?
[00:45] kusa
    That's so childish.
[00:46] atsu
    But I am a child.
[00:52] atsu
    I thought you didn't believe it, Kin-chan.
[00:54] kusa
    Just thought I'd try.
[00:56] atsu
    What did you wish for?
[00:59] kusa
    I wished for...
[01:00] gero
    Kusatsu-san.
[01:03] ari
    So this is where you were.
[01:05] gero
    What are you doing here with all the lights out?
[01:08] kusa
    Looking at the stars.
[01:10] gero
    Stars?
[01:11] kusa
    Yes. Shooting stars.
[01:14] ari
    Shooting stars? Wishing on a star, eh?
[01:17] ari
    I didn't know you were such a romantic, Kinshiro.
[01:22] gero
    So, what did you wish for?
[01:25] kusa
    I wished for...
[01:28] kusa
    World domination, of course.
SIGN    Cute Little Boys of Love and Youth
[03:09] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[03:10] wom
    S-Stop it! Stop it, stop it!
[03:14] yumoto
    But you stink.
[03:15] yumoto
    What's it called? Animal stink?
[03:17] wom
    But washing me like this...
[03:20] yumoto
    When you stink,
[03:21] yumoto
    after I cuddle you, people tell me I stink!
[03:26] wom
    I don't stink! You're the ones who—
[03:29] yumoto
    Huh? We're the ones who stink?
[03:34] yumoto
    What kind of stink?
[03:34] wom
    Human...
[03:36] yumoto
    Human stink?
[03:37] wom
    Yes!
[03:38] yumoto
    Oh, really?
[03:40] yumoto
    Do wombats have a sharp sense of smell?
[03:44] wom
    I just happen to resemble your Earth animal.
[03:47] wom
    I am not an actual wombat!
[03:51] yumoto
    Then what are you?
[03:51] wom
    I am wfirocbx...
[03:53] yumoto
    Wfiro...?
[03:54] wom
    Xjudsu...
[03:56] yumoto
    Huh? Ikuju...
[03:58] yumoto
    Oh, whatever! Let's just go with Wom-san!
[04:03] yumoto
    Don't run away!
[04:04] wom
    Made it!
[04:08] atsu
    Give it a break already, Yumoto.
[04:10] atsu
    You're just like a child.
[04:13] en
    Well, in Yumoto's case,
    it's not just his behavior.
[04:16] en
    He looks like a kid, too.
[04:18] yumoto
    What's wrong with that?
    That means I look young, right?
[04:21] en
    Young? You've got to be kidding.
[04:23] en
    We're in high school, you little kid.
[04:25] yumoto
    Please stop calling me a kid.
[04:28] atsu
    Okay, Yumoto-kun,
    what's your dream for the future?
[04:31] yumoto
    To be a superhero!
[04:32] en
    See? A kid.
[04:34] en
    Hey, everyone! There's a kid in here!
[04:37] atsu
    Besides, we're already superheroes.
[04:39] atsu
    Though we didn't ask to be...
[04:41] yumoto
    Oh, that's right.
[04:44] tawara
    Well, I will be taking my leave ahead of you.
[04:48] yumoto
    Hey, I'm not done yet.
[04:50] tawara
    Pardon.
[04:52] io
    You're not just young.
    You really are a child, Yumoto.
[04:56] io
    Do you still pay the
    child fare to ride the bus?
[05:02] io
    I'm so jealous. You don't
    have to spend as much money.
[05:05] yumoto
    You got me, huh?
[05:07] yumoto
    Just kidding!
[05:08] io
    That's the kind of thing
    that makes you a kid.
[05:15] ryuu
    Anyway, you need more than
    just youth on your side.
[05:18] ryuu
    You need to channel that into appeal.
[05:20] en
    If you ask me, I'd say you're
    pretty childish yourself, Ryuu.
[05:24] ryuu
    Oh, Yufuin-senpai, you don't know my true power.
[05:28] en
    What true power?
[05:29] ryuu
    From married women to
    elementary school girls—
[05:31] yumoto
    You can't beat me in video games!
[05:33] io
    You be quiet!
[05:36] yumoto
    Okay...
[05:39] en
    If we were in the samurai ages,
[05:42] en
    we would have had our coming of age
    ceremony and be full-fledged adults by now.
[05:45] en
    Your looks don't determine
    whether you're actually young.
[05:48] ryuu
    That's a senior for you. You're so mature.
[05:51] en
    Senior?
[05:52] atsu
    Well, senior can refer to an
    older person or an upperclassman.
[05:56] ryuu
    That's right, Senior-senpai.
[05:59] en
    I feel like he just called me an old man.
[06:02] en
    Does my face really look that old?
[06:04] io
    It means that your appearance
    and behavior are both mature.
[06:07] atsu
    Being called mature is a compliment, right?
[06:10] atsu
    That's why, in the samurai ages,
    they'd shave off their forelocks
[06:13] [SONG] atsu
    and make themselves intentionally bald.
SIGN    °This is his individual opinion about forelock-shaving.
[06:15] [SONG] io
    Oh? Was that artificial baldness?
[06:18] [SONG] atsu
    Yes, they thought being bald
    made you look more adult.
[06:21] yumoto
    So if I shaved myself bald,
    people might not call me a kid?
[06:24] io
    No, it would just look like a miso commercial.
[06:27] yumoto
    What does that mean?
[06:30] en
    Does my face look old?
[06:32] atsu
    En-chan, are you really worried about that?
[06:34] en
    Maybe so... Does my face look old?
[06:39] ryuu
    Being young is a wonderful thing!
[06:41] yumoto
    Me too! Me too!
[06:48] io
    What is that?
[06:50] io
    You don't understand at all.
[06:55] en
    My inner calm reflects itself on my face.
[07:00] atsu
    He's so worried about it.
[07:11] yumoto
    I'm sorry, Mister. Were we being too loud?
[07:17] atsu
    Hey, Yumoto.
[07:18] en
    He's not an older man.
[07:21] en
    He wasn't wearing his uniform,
[07:24] en
    so I thought he was just some older guy, too.
[07:26] en
    But I just now realized...
[07:28] atsu
    He's a student at our high school.
[07:31] atsu
    They call him "the guy with
    the face of a 50-year-old."
SIGN    Igarao Oyaji
[07:37] atsu
    Igarao Oyaji!
[07:43] oyaji
    Damn it. I'm not an old man.
[07:45] kid
    Sir, good morning.
[07:46] oyaji
    When I go to school,
    they confuse me for a teacher.
[07:48] kid
    Go ahead!
[07:49] oyaji
    When I ride the train,
    people give up their seats for me.
[07:51] kid
    What's with that old guy?
[07:52] oyaji
    I didn't choose to be born
    with a face like this.
[07:55] oyaji
    I want to enjoy my youth like
    a high school student, too.
[07:59] oyaji
    I'm not an old man. I'm not an old man.
[08:02] oyaji
    I'm not an old man!
[08:07] ari
    He's our next target, eh?
[08:10] gero
    I see. I feel powerful dark energy from him.
[08:14] kusa
    His age complex will likely create
    a powerful negative field.
[08:21] zun
    Then let us go.
[08:23] kusa
    Conquest!
[08:26] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[08:29] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[08:31] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[08:36] trio
    Donum!
[09:01] yumoto
    Good morning, Gora!
[09:03] gora
    Oh, you're up early, Yumoto.
[09:04] yumoto
    Yeah, I've got club stuff.
[09:07] gora
    You do club stuff? Morning training?
[09:10] yumoto
    Morning cuddles!
[09:12] gora
    Morning cuddles?
[09:13] yumoto
    Yeah, morning cuddles.
[09:15] yumoto
    Thanks for the lunch, as usual!
[09:17] gora
    Sorry it's rice balls again.
[09:19] yumoto
    Nah, your rice balls are
    the best in the world!
[09:34] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[09:37] atsu
    How long are you going to do that?
[09:39] atsu
    I can't believe you don't get tired of it.
[09:40] yumoto
    But it's fun.
[09:43] io
    Why not put that effort into a part-time job?
[09:46] io
    You could make a lot of money.
[09:47] yumoto
    That's not fun.
[09:49] ryuu
    Why not pick up girls?
[09:51] yumoto
    No interest in that.
[09:53] en
    Does my face really look that old?
[09:55] atsu
    Hey, are you still stuck on that, En-chan?
[09:57] en
    But that was the first time in my life
    I've been told my face looks old.
[10:01] en
    People had only described me
    as "hot" or "gorgeous" before.
[10:05] atsu
    I've never heard that...
[10:07] io
    Isn't that normal for an 18-year-old boy?
[10:10] io
    Isn't it people like Yumoto and
    Ryuu who are the exception?
[10:13] ryuu
    Don't lump me in with Yumoto.
[10:15] ryuu
    I'm cute! He's a kid.
[10:18] yumoto
    You called?
[10:22] atsu
    No, no. That's not true.
[10:24] atsu
    Having a face that looks old
    is like, for example,
[10:26] atsu
    the husband in that anime who has
    a coworker with really prominent lips,
[10:30] atsu
    but it turns out he's really 27.
[10:32] en
    Why are you talking about a nationally
    famous anime all of a sudden?
[10:36] en
    Why are you associating me,
    an 18-year-old, with that character who's 27?
[10:40] atsu
    Well, um, um...
[10:43] atsu
    The savior of the century's end
    with seven stars on his chest,
[10:45] atsu
    the cynical #2 of the Science Ninja Team,
[10:49] atsu
    and the protagonist's dark-skinned friend
[10:50] atsu
    voiced by Iizuka Shouzou
    in that robot war story
[10:52] atsu
    are all 18, too.
[10:54] atsu
    But you look much younger than them!
[10:56] en
    Why is this turning into even
    more of an anime superfan discussion?
[10:59] en
    And why is Iizuka Shouzou-san
    the only person you named outright?
[11:03] ryuu
    What are they talking about?
[11:05] io
    No idea.
[11:06] yumoto
    I like unagi more than anago!
[11:09] wombat
    Now's my chance!
[11:15] yumoto
    Hey, wait!
SIGN    Zaou Ryuu
    Born March 13th
    Blood Type B / Pisces
    Hobby: Snowboarding
    Likes: Girls, cherries
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[11:38] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[11:40] yumoto
    Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
[11:42] en
    Stop it, Yumoto! What are you doing?
[11:44] yumoto
    Well, Wom-san ran away, so...
[11:48] en
    Cut it out! Why me, then?
[11:49] atsu
    He really is a kid.
[11:50] io
    Such an unproductive endeavor
    won't earn you a single yen, you know.
[11:54] ryuu
    There's nothing fun about
    two men fooling around.
[11:58] yumoto
    Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
[12:00] atsu
    What is this?
[12:02] atsu
    I'm getting an irresistible urge to tickle En-chan.
[12:08] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[12:09] en
    Why you now?
[12:11] atsu
    Well, it just looked so fun! Woosh, woosh!
[12:14] io
    Senpai, what are you doing?
[12:16] io
    Actually, I want to do it, too!
[12:19] io
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[12:19] ryuu
    What are you doing, Io?
[12:22] ryuu
    Damn! I'm getting revenge!
[12:25] en
    Then I'll get revenge, too!
[12:28] atsu
    Turning the tables is no fair!
[12:37] yumoto
    Hey, doesn't something seem weird?
[12:39] en
    Like what?
[12:40] atsu
    Now that you mention it, why are we
    acting like elementary schoolers?
[12:43] io
    I just got the urge to do it.
[12:46] yumoto
    It's almost like we've turned
    into elementary schoolers.
[12:49] yumoto
    Yeah, 'cause we have turned
    into elementary schoolers!
[12:53] all
    What's going on here?!
[12:55] wombat
    Terrible news! An enemy's appeared!
[13:03] en
    Wh-What's all this?
[13:09] atsu
    What's going on?
[13:11] io
    The students have all become children.
[13:14] ryuu
    Darn it! I had a date after this!
[13:16] en
    That's what bothers you?
[13:17] yumoto
    Yay! Yay! This is kinda fun!
[13:20] en
    He's the only one who doesn't
    seem to have changed much.
[13:23] all
    Yeah.
[13:24] en
    You think this is the
    work of an enemy monster?
[13:27] yumoto
    Hey! Look at that!
[13:38] monster
    Become young again! Become young again!
[13:44] en
    Is that monster's power
    turning everyone into children?
[13:47] wombat
    Everyone! Time for Love Making!
[13:49] all
    Right!
[13:50] yumoto
    Love Making!
[13:54] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[13:56] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[13:58] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[13:59] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[14:01] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[14:02] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[14:05] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[14:06] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[14:08] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[14:10] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[14:12] yumoto
    We are...
[14:13] yumoto
    Wait, what's up with this?!
[14:16] atsu
    That's weird. Why's it so baggy?
[14:19] en
    Our other clothes changed to child sizes.
[14:22] io
    This setup is lacking consistency.
[14:24] ryu
    And I really liked my costume, too.
[14:28] io
    You like that thing?
[14:31] monster
    Who are you people?
[14:34] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[14:37] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[14:40] io
    Love is all!
[14:41] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[14:44] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[14:47] five
    Battle Lovers!
[14:49] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[14:52] five
    Of love!
[14:55] yumoto
    You monster! We're gonna fight you!
[14:58] monster
    Battle Lovers? We'll see about that.
[15:01] yumoto
    What was that?
[15:03] yumoto
    Take this!
[15:04] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[15:09] yumoto
    Huh? Why?
[15:10] atsu
    Has our power been halved
    because we're children?
[15:14] io
    It's the child rate?
[15:16] monster
    Then allow me to take the lead.
[15:38] monster
    What's wrong, Battle Lovers?
[15:40] monster
    These baggy clothes are hard to move in.
[15:42] ryuu
    Damn.
[15:44] ryuu
    I hate looking so uncool.
[15:46] io
    That's what bothers you?
[15:49] monster
    How unsightly.
[15:51] yumoto
    Damn it...
[15:53] monster
    Fall to ruin, Battle Lovers!
[16:02] atsu
    Hey, all we're doing is saying "wah!"
[16:05] monster
    Fall to ruin! Fall to ruin, all of you!
[16:08] monster
    This is your punishment for treating me
    like an old man based on the way I look!
[16:12] yumoto
    What did he say?
[16:14] atsu
    Is it possible he's...
[16:15] en
    "The guy with the face of a 50-year old"...
[16:17] en
    Igarao Oyaji!
[16:19] monster
    Don't call me by that nickname!
[16:29] monster
    Then I'll make you even younger.
[16:42] en
    What's going on?
[16:44] atsu
    I can't move!
[16:45] io
    It appears we've turned into
    kindergarteners this time.
[16:49] ryuu
    What was that?
[16:51] monster
    You literally can't raise a hand against me.
[16:54] yumoto
    Darn you, darn you, darn you.
[16:56] yumoto
    Oh, it undid our transformation.
[16:59] en
    Undid? Or disrobed?
[17:02] atsu
    "Disrobed our transformation"
    doesn't sound right for the genre.
[17:06] io
    This is very embarrassing.
[17:09] ryuu
    I'm not embarrassed, but I won't
    forgive you for making that smaller.
[17:14] monster
    At this stage, you're effectively babies.
[17:16] monster
    No, you are babies.
[17:19] monster
    Then I'll send you to hell,
    as easy as taking candy from a baby!
[17:27] en
    Damn... At this rate...
[17:29] atsu
    Are we done for?
[17:33] io
    If I'd known this was going to happen,
    I would have spent all my savings.
[17:37] ryuu
    The women of the world will lament this.
[17:44] yumoto
    Wait a minute.
[17:46] en
    What is it at a time like this?
[17:48] yumoto
    Something's weird.
[17:49] atsu
    Weird?
[17:50] yumoto
    The setup here is that everyone's turning
    young because of him, right?
[17:54] io
    That's right. So?
[17:56] yumoto
    Then it really is weird.
[17:58] ryuu
    What's weird?
[18:00] yumoto
    Well, if that's the old man high school student,
[18:03] yumoto
    he wouldn't look like that,
    even if he turned young.
[18:07] ryuu
    I get it. Even young,
    someone who's ugly is still ugly.
[18:11] en
    He'd never become a pretty young boy.
[18:14] atsu
    Which means this is...
[18:15] yumoto
    An illusion!
[18:17] monster
    Oh, no!
[18:20] yumoto
    Now!
[18:31] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[18:37] monster
    What?!
[18:51] yumoto
    You're not really an old man.
[18:54] yumoto
    You're an 18-year-old high school student.
[18:57] yumoto
    Isn't it the resentment you feel that's
    really turning you into an old man?
[19:03] atsu
    That all sounds impressive,
    but it's not really fixing anything.
[19:07] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[19:16] monster
    What is this strange sensation?
[19:19] monster
    Comfort... healing...
[19:21] monster
    I see... So this is love.
[19:29] yumoto
    Love is over!
[19:31] io
    We're back to normal!
[19:37] yumoto
    Well, let's all put this
    behind us and have a bath!
[19:41] yumoto
    We're naked anyway!
[19:42] en
    Speaking of which, where'd our clothes go?
[19:44] yumoto
    Let's go!
[19:48] ari
    Accursed Battle Lovers.
[19:51] gero
    They foiled us yet again.
[19:53] zun
    It appears we failed once more.
[19:56] kusa
    Lord Zundar, I am sorry.
[19:59] zun
    No matter.
[20:01] zun
    Let them bask in their overconfidence for now.
[20:05] kusa
    Next time, I swear...
[20:07] zun
    I'll be counting on you.
[20:09] kusa
    Sir.
[20:10] ari
    But I thought this plan to turn the enemy
    into elementary schoolers to seal their power
[20:15] ari
    would work out well.
[20:18] kusa
    Elementary schoolers, huh?
[20:20] gero
    Is something wrong?
[20:22] kusa
    No... It's nothing.
[20:26] kusa
    Just remembering something from long ago.
[20:33] yumoto
    Woosh, woosh, woosh!
[20:36] en
    Enough of that, Yumoto.
[20:38] en
    He really is a kid.
[20:40] atsu
    Well, he's the only one who didn't change
    at all when the enemy made us young.
[20:44] en
    No matter how young you
    make the kid, a kid is still a kid.
[20:52] ryuu
    Oh, no!
[20:53] io
    Don't worry. The shield function made
    it so he wouldn't recognize our faces.
[20:56] ryuu
    Oh, that's right.
[21:03] atsu
    You seem to be in a good mood.
[21:05] en
    Did something good happen to you?
[21:08] oyaji
    Well, actually, I got a girlfriend.
[21:13] ryuu
    Oh, does she like older men?
[21:14] io
    Hey!
[21:15] oyaji
    That's right.
[21:17] oyaji
    She says they're wonderfully reliable.
[21:22] oyaji
    She said she made a wish on
    a star to meet a wonderful man.
[21:28] io
    I see...
[21:30] atsu
    You heard him.
[21:31] en
    Why are you telling me that?
[21:32] ryuu
    I'm glad to hear it,
    though it's also kind of annoying.
[21:36] oyaji
    Yes!
[21:39] en
    What is it?
[21:40] atsu
    He reminded me that I made a wish
    on a shooting star when I was little.
[21:44] en
    What was it?
[21:45] atsu
    To be a superhero.
[21:47] en
    Just like a kid.
[21:49] atsu
    Well, I was a kid.
[21:51] en
    You can't say anything about Yumoto.
[21:54] atsu
    That reminds me.
[21:55] atsu
    What did he wish for then, I wonder?
[21:59] yumoto
    Woosh! Woosh, woosh!
[22:02] wombat
    Please stop...
[22:07] wombat
    Ma-Ma-Macho...
[23:40] ryuu
    For some reason, the Press Society guys
    are hanging around the Defense Club.
[23:44] ryuu
    They muscle in on my calls to girls.
    It's beyond annoying!
[23:48] ryuu
    Remote control? I'll buy you one of those!
[23:50] ryuu
    Next time: To Steal Love Without Regret.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    To Steal Love Without Regret
[23:52] ryuu
    Love Making!

5 - To Steal Love Without Regret

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] kino
    There's a mysterious cosplay group
    causing a ruckus around the school lately...
[00:08] kino
    Their identities aren't visible
    to the naked eye or in pictures.
[00:13] kino
    This could be interesting material.
SIGN    To Steal Love Without Regret
[02:08] en
    Raining again today?
[02:11] atsu
    It is the rainy season, after all.
[02:13] en
    It's hard to be enthusiastic when it's raining.
[02:16] atsu
    About what?
[02:17] en
    Active and aggressive things.
[02:20] atsu
    In all the time I've known you,
[02:22] atsu
    I've never seen you do anything
    active and aggressive.
[02:26] en
    Really?
[02:27] atsu
    The Yufuin En I know is
    always passive and defensive.
[02:31] en
    That's my Atsushi.
    He's got the English skills.
[02:35] io
    Apparently, "naïve" and "sensitive"
[02:37] io
    are not considered compliments
    in the English-speaking world.
[02:40] ryuu
    People say stuff like
    "a naïve young man," though.
[02:42] atsu
    Over there, that means "a careless young man."
[02:46] io
    Exactly!
[02:48] ryuu
    Why are you looking at me?
[02:50] io
    It just seemed appropriate.
[02:51] ryuu
    Io, I am not a careless young man.
[02:55] ryuu
    I am a guileless young man.
[02:57] io
    You have a wonderfully high opinion of yourself.
[03:01] en
    Totally losing my motivation...
[03:02] atsu
    I'm telling you, you never had any.
[03:10] en
    Yumoto?
[03:13] atsu
    Were your pupils dilated just now?
[03:16] yumoto
    Something about touching Wom-san
    takes me closer to Nirvana.
[03:22] en
    Like Linus's blanket?
[03:24] atsu
    Oh, yeah, like a feeling of security?
[03:26] yumoto
    It's a little different from security.
[03:29] en
    Then what is it?
[03:30] yumoto
    What, indeed?
[03:32] en
    You're asking me?
[03:33] wom
    I say "no thank you" to being cuddled for no reason!
[03:36] yumoto
    Don't say that!
[03:37] yumoto
    Unhand me, you!
[03:39] wom
    Let me cuddle you!
[03:41] wom
    Day after day after day,
    you've cuddled me so much,
[03:44] wom
    the fur around my stomach is thinning out!
[03:47] yumoto
    Then I'll do your back from now on!
[03:49] wom
    That is not the issue!
[03:52] io
    Does it absolutely have to be Wombat?
[03:54] io
    Could it be something else?
[03:55] yumoto
    Hmm! Good question!
[03:58] yumoto
    Something about his cuddliness
    is just right to me.
[04:02] yumoto
    Gives me that "feel so fine" feeling!
[04:04] io
    What if he were some other kind of fluffy?
[04:06] yumoto
    I'd consider it.
[04:08] io
    Floofy?
[04:09] yumoto
    Absolutely!
[04:11] io
    Fuzzy?
[04:12] yumoto
    That would be fine.
[04:13] io
    Like that over there?
[04:15] yumoto
    Oh, that's good!
[04:18] yumoto
    Wait, that's...
[04:21] trio
    Mr. Tawarayama!
[04:23] ryuu
    What is all this?
[04:24] atsu
    Mold? Is it mold? It's mold!
[04:26] en
    Hey, hey, hey!
[04:28] en
    Cut it out!
[04:30] ryuu
    Wombat, what happened
    to your advanced science?
[04:33] wombat
    I'm sorry!
[04:34] wombat
    The high temperature and humidity lately
[04:37] wombat
    have created favorable
    conditions for mold growth!
[04:39] io
    "Favorable"? It's utterly putrid.
[04:42] wom
    It's fine! Get rid of the mold and
    the main body will still be fine!
[04:47] io
    The hyphae of mold go down
    deeper than you'd think.
[04:50] yumoto
    One time, I picked the mold off some
    bread and ate it, and I got sick!
[04:53] ryuu
    Are you stupid?
[04:54] yumoto
    I was hungry!
[04:56] atsu
    Anyway, it's bad that he's growing mold, isn't it?
[04:59] yumoto
    Let's wash him! Let's wash him!
[05:00] yumoto
    Everything turns out okay after a washing!
[05:05] yumoto
    What's this? What color is this?
[05:07] atsu
    Wombat, you have to be more
    careful with Mr. Tawarayama.
[05:11] en
    Yeah, there's no love in this.
[05:13] wombat
    You say that I, who came here to fill
    the Earth with love, have no love?!
[05:17] ryuu
    Nope, none.
[05:18] io
    Crude in every way.
[05:19] yumoto
    Upsy-daisy!
[05:23] en
    Hey. He fell.
[05:25] yumoto
    There, it turned out okay!
[05:27] four
    It did not!
[05:28] ryuu
    If anyone saw this,
    they'd say it was elder abuse!
[05:31] io
    Assault, right?
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[05:32] yumoto
    He just looks that way because
    he's wet. If we dry him off...
[05:37] en
    I thought I just heard a knock.
[05:40] ryuu
    But no one's ever visited us before.
[05:43] atsu
    Either way, this situation clearly looks bad!
[05:46] io
    All Hell's gonna break loose, yeah.
[05:50] kino
    Pardon me!
[05:53] yumoto
    Man, he sure is persistent!
[05:55] en
    Hey!
[05:58] yumoto
    Who's there? What do you want?
[06:00] kino
    Oh, how rude of me.
[06:02] kino
    I am Kinosaki of the PS.
[06:05] yumoto
    PS?
[06:07] kino
    The Press Society.
[06:09] kino
    This is my photographer, Tazawa.
[06:11] taz
    Hey.
SIGN    Binan High School
    Press Society
    Kinosaki Kou
[06:12] kino
    A pleasure to make your acquaintance.
[06:14] atsu
    And what do two members of
    the Press Society want with us?
[06:17] kino
    How rude of me.
[06:18] kino
    The truth is, I publish online articles
    for the Binan High School Press Society
[06:22] kino
    about daily life on campus.
[06:27] atsu
    Online?
[06:28] kino
    The other day at a meeting,
    I proposed a new project:
[06:31] kino
    could we make a theme out of the
    "bonds" between distinctive teachers
[06:34] kino
    and the students around them?
[06:37] kino
    I call it "Beloved Teachers"!
[06:40] kino
    Well? Don't you think it's a great project?
[06:43] all
    Yeah...
[06:44] kino
    Thank you for the words of praise.
[06:47] kino
    A flower of compassion blooming
    quietly in the wild concrete jungle...
[06:51] kino
    The bond between student and
    teacher is the most precious of all!
[06:55] kino
    "My teacher!" "My class!"
[06:57] kino
    Souls crying out to each other!
[06:59] kino
    A miraculous meeting!
[07:00] yumoto
    This guy's weird.
[07:02] en
    You're one to talk.
[07:04] kino
    Don't let it worry you.
[07:05] kino
    The press is often misunderstood.
[07:08] kino
    But to root out the truth and
    convey it in elaborate, minute detail...
[07:14] kino
    I believe that is our mission.
[07:19] ryuu
    Hey, what are you doing?
[07:20] io
    I refuse to have my picture taken.
[07:22] kino
    No, I just received your consent to be covered.
[07:26] kino
    I thought we'd get started right away.
[07:28] ryuu
    Covered?
[07:29] io
    Consent?
[07:30] atsu
    Who gave it?
[07:31] kino
    Oh, honestly!
[07:32] kino
    Right now, you just said it
    was a good project, didn't you?
[07:36] kino
    Now, let's get right to the
    interview wth Mr. Tawarayama!
[07:41] kino
    Mr. Tawarayama, from all that I've just seen,
[07:45] kino
    you seem to enjoy a very frank
    relationship with your students.
[07:49] en
    What you've just seen?
[07:50] kino
    Yes.
[07:51] kino
    I was below when I caught sight of
    the fun you were having by the window.
[07:57] kino
    Mr. Tawarayama, you seem truly
    energetic for a man of your age.
[08:02] kino
    Please, tell us the secret of
    your health and agile movements.
[08:08] kino
    Mr. Tawarayama?
[08:10] en
    We decline this interview.
[08:13] atsu
    We're a boring club.
    No one's going to find it interesting.
[08:15] kino
    No, no.
[08:16] kino
    It is the users who will determine
    what's interesting and what's not.
[08:20] io
    Please leave.
[08:22] ryuu
    If you don't...
[08:23] kino
    Um, you can refuse if you want to, but...
[08:26] kino
    I have a little something
    called freedom of the press.
[08:29] kino
    So I'm going to gather material
    without hesitation. Okay?
[08:35] io
    It's a violation of our likeness usage rights.
[08:38] io
    Nowadays, you have to be very careful
[08:40] io
    about how you use personal information.
[08:42] kino
    Yes. That's why I thought it would be
    beneficial for you to use us, as well.
[08:48] kino
    Let's make it a win-win situation!
[08:54] wom
    Oh, dear...
[09:00] kino
    Good morning, Yufuin-san!
[09:02] kino
    It seems we're finally getting a bit of
    a break from the rainy season, eh?
[09:06] kino
    Are you feeling well, Yufuin-san?
[09:09] kino
    Come to think of it,
    I don't see Kinugawa-san around.
[09:12] kino
    Are you all alone, Yufuin-san?
[09:14] en
    Atsushi has day duty.
[09:15] en
    So what do you want?
[09:17] kino
    How rude of me.
[09:19] kino
    I'm here for your morning
    greeting and interview.
[09:22] en
    Interview?
[09:23] kino
    Yes. Yufuin En-san, what are your hobbies?
[09:27] en
    Hobbies? None, really.
[09:29] kino
    Special skills?
[09:31] en
    Special skills? None, really.
[09:32] kino
    He says he has no real skills.
[09:35] en
    Uh, I don't like you putting it that way...
[09:37] kino
    Favorite foods?
[09:39] en
    Well, none really.
[09:40] kino
    He has no favorite foods.
[09:41] en
    Look, I told you...
[09:42] kino
    You're not giving me much of an interview.
[09:45] en
    Well, you can't just ask me
    this stuff out of the blue.
[09:48] en
    Give me some questions
    that are easier to answer.
[09:51] kino
    Questions that are easier to answer?
[09:53] kino
    Let me see...
[09:55] kino
    If you suddenly became a superhero
    tasked with protecting the Earth,
[09:58] kino
    what would you do?
[10:01] kino
    Well, it's a purely hypothetical question.
[10:03] kino
    What would you do if something
    like that were to happen?
[10:08] kino
    Are you the type that would find
    it bothersome? Or would you...
[10:14] kino
    That pose... Discomfort? Despair?!
[10:17] io
    It's the rage, fury, and indignation
    over a failed FX transaction!
[10:21] ryuu
    You're so stupid.
[10:23] ryuu
    Don't cry. I hate women who cry.
[10:26] kino
    Even if he became a superhero,
    he'd hate women who cry, he says.
[10:30] ryuu
    I can buy you a remote control, at least.
[10:32] ryuu
    Huh? Are remote controls that expensive?
[10:35] ryuu
    Then just do it by hand.
[10:38] kino
    It's tough when you can't
    change from hot air to cold.
[10:42] ryuu
    Why can't you just put it
    on an automatic setting?
[10:44] kino
    Carefully adjusting your settings is better
    for the environment, don't you think?
[10:48] ryuu
    Shut up!
[10:50] ryuu
    Hello? Hello?
[10:53] kino
    Your defense of romance failed, I see.
[10:55] ryuu
    Save it!
[10:57] atsu
    What is that?
[10:59] atsu
    Like part of a "ten questions" thing?
[11:01] kino
    No, no. Nothing so sophisticated.
[11:04] atsu
    Good point. That would
    make a boring question.
[11:08] kino
    Oh, you got one on me there.
[11:15] yumoto
    I can't eat any more...
[11:21] wom
    Huh?
[11:22] tawara
    Just ten more minutes...
[11:25] wom
    What, what?
[11:36] maru
    I am a puppet under my father's control.
SIGN    Sousa Enkaku
[11:39] maru
    I can only follow the rails he's laid for me.
[11:41] aur
    Is that so?
[11:47] aur
    Then perhaps it's time you did the controlling.
SIGN    Io Naruko
    Born December 17th
    Blood Type A / Capricorn
    Hobbies: Financial investment and management
    Likes: Money, beef bowls
[12:02] en
    They're... Or, I should say he's annoying.
[12:05] io
    He's awful. In the last two days,
    I've suffered a loss of 1.8 million.
[12:09] ryuu
    I wish he'd disappear. Just turn to dust.
[12:12] wom
    Really!
[12:13] wom
    With those two hanging around,
    I can't act freely at all!
[12:18] wom
    I have to stay close to that
    individual, and I can't even talk!
[12:22] wom
    I'm so restricted! I feel so trapped!
[12:25] wom
    You may as well call it oppression!
    We must do something at once!
[12:30] atsu
    Isn't this reaping what you sow?
[12:32] yumoto
    It's okay. I'll cuddle you in exchange.
[12:35] wom
    That ain't the point!
[12:36] yumoto
    They didn't come see me for an interview.
[12:39] yumoto
    I would've answered, too.
[12:41] wom
    You were just sleepin' like a baby!
[12:43] ryuu
    I've never seen Wombat so pissed off.
[12:46] io
    When he gets pissed off,
    he talks with a Kansai accent, then?
[12:49] atsu
    It's fine to rant, but please don't
    leave Mr. Tawarayama like that.
[12:53] ryuu
    Really, you keep cooling
    him off and heating him up...
[12:56] wom
    What are you sayin'?
[12:57] wom
    An hour or two away from him ain't
    gonna make a difference at this point!
[13:01] yumoto
    Wombat's gone delinquent!
[13:03] yumoto
    Hey, what's wrong with you—
[13:05] wombat
    Don't touch me!
[13:06] wombat
    Jackass! Your mama's got an outie!
[13:08] ryuu
    The stress is causing Wombat
    to resort to name calling!
[13:12] io
    He's being pretty careless.
[13:14] atsu
    Does that make him naïve?
[13:18] kino
    Hello!
[13:21] kino
    Is this what they call a "naked hang-out"?
[13:24] kino
    The Kurotama Bath.
    It's a fine location, isn't it?
[13:27] kino
    We're going to take
    advantage of it in a big way!
[13:31] kino
    So the Defense Club is taking a
    bath along with their pink pet.
[13:35] kino
    How nice! Talk about a fine picture!
[13:37] kino
    And Mr. Tawarayama has a very
    distinctive bathing style.
[13:47] atsu
    Excuse me, Kinosaki-san.
[13:48] atsu
    This is a private gathering.
    Could you please refrain from doing this?
[13:53] kino
    Oh, how rude of me.
[13:54] kino
    Of course, whether you participate
    or not is your own choice.
[13:58] atsu
    Well, outsiders are not really... you know?
[14:01] kino
    Oh? Does this place have a membership system?
[14:04] atsu
    No, it's not that...
[14:07] kino
    But Mr. Tawarayama sure can hold
    his breath a long time, can't he?
[14:15] en
    Seriously? At a time like this?
[14:17] yumoto
    This is the usual Lovra—
[14:20] kino
    Love? What was that? What was that?
[14:22] atsu
    Um, well...
[14:24] en
    Mr. Tawarayama's spent
    too long in the hot water.
[14:27] en
    Why don't we cool him down a while?
[14:28] both
    Yes, yes, let's do that.
[14:30] kino
    Ah, but...
[14:32] both
    C'mon, Mr. Tawarayama!
[14:33] ---
    You don't want to get dizzy.
[14:33] ---
    Let's take a break over there.
[14:37] atsu
    We'll be back soon.
[14:39] en
    Please, enjoy the bath, you two.
[14:42] wom
    Hurry! Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[14:46] atsu
    Calm down, Wombat.
[14:48] en
    There's no way we can transform here.
[14:50] wom
    But while we're standing here,
    love is, love was, love will be...
[14:55] en
    If we transform now, they'll find us out.
[14:57] atsu
    I bet he's already suspicious of us.
[14:59] yumoto
    Would it be bad if they found out?
[15:01] ryuu
    Of course.
[15:02] io
    If they find out...
[15:03] kino
    What's with those outfits?
[15:05] kino
    Is there a point to the big speeches?
[15:08] kino
    How does it feel?
[15:09] kino
    You guys!
[15:11] en
    No way.
[15:15] ryuu
    That hurts, darn it!
[15:17] io
    Can't we turn these things off?
[15:19] wom
    It won't stop until you end
    it with the Love Shower!
[15:22] en
    This sucks.
[15:23] atsu
    If we don't hurry, they'll finish their bath!
[15:26] yumoto
    We'll just have to kill him.
[15:27] all
    Huh?
[15:28] atsu
    Who?
[15:29] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama. He'll have to die for us!
[15:34] all
    Oh...
[15:35] all
    No way!
[15:37] ryuu
    How frightening!
[15:38] io
    Isn't that a little out of date?
[15:41] yumoto
    Now, now. Just hear me out.
[15:44] kino
    What are they talking about?
[15:48] kino
    What happened?
[15:50] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama...
[15:51] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama isn't breathing!
[15:56] yumoto
    Look, Kinosaki-san!
[15:58] yumoto
    See? He's not breathing, right?
    And his pupils are dilated!
[16:03] yumoto
    Go on! Check and make sure!
[16:06] yumoto
    Do it! It's the press's job to get to the truth!
[16:10] kino
    Th-That is true...
[16:12] kino
    Y-You're right. It's not beating.
[16:14] yumoto
    This is awful!
[16:17] atsu
    So, we're going to go call a doctor!
[16:20] atsu
    Please stay with Mr. Tawarayama until then!
[16:24] atsu
    Let's go, Defense Club!
[16:26] atsu
    Let's defend Mr. Tawarayama's life and health!
[16:29] four
    Yeah!
[16:30] kino
    Hey, wai—
[16:34] kino
    Hey! Go after them!
[16:35] taz
    But we're naked.
[16:37] kino
    They're naked, too!
[16:43] wom
    Now!
[16:44] yumoto
    Love Making!
[16:49] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[16:51] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[16:54] io
    Love is all!
[16:55] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[16:58] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:00] five
    Battle Lovers!
[17:02] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[17:04] five
    Of love!
[17:08] ryuu
    Oh, come on!
[17:09] ryuu
    We don't need to do the introduction
    if we're transforming in secret!
[17:11] io
    Besides, we don't have time!
[17:13] wom
    It's a matter of feeling and etiquette!
[17:15] wom
    Let's go!
[17:21] boy
    There!
[17:29] boy
    It's hot.
[17:30] boy
    What is this?
[17:33] boy
    The air conditioner! And it's hot air!
[17:35] boy
    Who hit the heater button?
[17:40] monster
    Touching the control panel directly...
[17:42] monster
    You hate that minor task so much,
    you invented the remote control to avoid it.
[17:48] monster
    But in exchange for that slight saving of time,
[17:51] monster
    you also invite a great threat...
[17:54] monster
    Air conditioners that can't cool in the summer!
[17:57] monster
    Video games that can't get
    past the title screen!
[17:59] monster
    Bidet toilets that won't
    stop washing your butthole!
[18:02] monster
    TVs locked forever on TV Tokyo!
[18:07] monster
    Now, let's make things a little warmer!
[18:12] boys
    It's hot...
[18:13] boys
    So hot...
[18:19] yumoto
    Battle Lover Kick!
[18:26] yumoto
    You are really, really,
    really, really long-winded!
[18:28] yumoto
    We're in a hurry, you know!
[18:30] yumoto
    If you don't have a remote control,
    just pull the plug and consider from there!
[18:34] ryuu
    That was fast.
[18:35] en
    One hit?
[18:36] atsu
    It's like there was no
    reason for us to be here.
[18:38] io
    Seriously.
[18:39] yumoto
    Okay! Let's finish this quick!
[18:42] monster
    I don't think so!
[18:46] four
    He stopped!
[18:50] monster
    Did you forget I'm the
    Remote Control Monster?
[18:55] yumoto
    My body's moving on its own!
[18:57] monster
    You are but a puppet that moves
    as my remote control dictates!
[19:06] ---
    Gulp!
[19:07] monster
    C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
[19:13] monster
    C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
[19:17] wombat
    Shut up!
[19:19] yumoto
    Now!
[19:20] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[19:29] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[19:37] monster
    So I was also a mere puppet under their control?
[19:42] monster
    From now on, I should follow my own will...
[19:49] yumoto
    Love is over!
[19:51] atsu
    I'm so done objecting to that.
[19:53] en
    Hey, this is Sousa Enkaku from class 3-B.
[19:56] atsu
    So the monsters are being
    controlled by someone?
[20:00] ryuu
    Who could it be?
[20:01] io
    Hey! We have to get back, quick!
[20:03] yumoto
    Oh, no!
[20:08] kino
    What should we do?
[20:10] taz
    For the time being...
[20:17] yumoto
    Mr. Tawarayama! Have you come to?
[20:21] yumoto
    How do you feel?
[20:22] tawara
    Ah, hello, my friends. I feel fine.
[20:26] yumoto
    That is a fine thing to hear.
[20:28] ryuu
    Why are they talking like
    they're in a period drama?
[20:30] io
    Who knows?
[20:31] yumoto
    Mr. Tawaramura, this is
    Kinosaki-san and Tazawa-san,
[20:35] yumoto
    who took care of you while you were out.
[20:38] tawara
    So you are my Florence Nightengales?
[20:41] kino
    N-No...
[20:43] en
    We fooled them completely... I guess?
[20:45] atsu
    I dunno.
[20:46] yumoto
    I know! A picture! Let's take a picture!
[20:49] yumoto
    Gora! Come here a minute!
[20:52] gora
    What is it, Yumoto?
[20:54] kino
    The Village of the Eight Tombs!
[20:55] yumoto
    Take our picture for us!
[20:58] gora
    Sure.
[20:59] yumoto
    Let us borrow that.
[21:01] gora
    Okay, I'm taking it.
[21:02] yumoto
    Go for it!
[21:03] gora
    One, two... snap!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club Defending the Teacher
[21:11] kusa
    What is this?
[21:13] ari
    "The heartwarming bonds that
    unite the teachers and students
[21:16] ari
    of Binan High School," apparently.
[21:18] kusa
    What nonsense.
[21:20] kusa
    And why are they dressed like this?
[21:22] kusa
    It's the height of vulgarity.
[21:24] gero
    Although it seems to have
    gotten quite a reaction.
[21:27] kusa
    A reaction?
[21:28] gero
    Yes, along with words of praise
    from the neighborhood.
[21:34] ari
    What shall we do, Kinshiro?
[21:37] ari
    We'll have to accept their
    club application sooner or later.
SIGN    By order of the
    Binan High School
    Student Council
[21:47] gero
    Oh, it's upside down.
[21:50] kino
    Our direct report
[21:52] kino
    went pretty well for the first stage, didn't it?
[22:01] kino
    Right?
[23:40] io
    If we get bad grades on our finals,
    the Defense Club will be disbanded?!
[23:44] io
    And the student council is
    offering me a position as treasurer?
[23:48] io
    Sure thing, if you pay me!
[23:50] io
    Next time: Love is Something
    You Wear on Your Back.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is Something You Wear on Your Back
[23:53] io
    Love Making!

6 - Love is Something You Wear on Your Back

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Salmon Vegetables Hamburg Steak
[00:07] yumoto
    Food! Food!
[00:09] en
    Yumoto, this is already your third meal of the day.
[00:12] yumoto
    I just get so hungry after a cuddle!
[00:16] yumoto
    Hey, I'll take this!
[00:18] atsu
    Being young is an amazing thing.
[00:20] en
    In his case, I don't think it has
    anything to do with being young.
[00:24] gero
    In my case,
[00:25] gero
    eating without a tablecloth on the table
    always cuts my appetite in half, but...
[00:30] gero
    President, Vice President,
    what about you two?
[00:33] kusa
    I've heard that in Europe during the Middle Ages,
[00:36] kusa
    they used the tablecloth to wipe their mouths.
[00:39] kusa
    I'm grateful that they changed
    that to individual napkins.
[00:43] ari
    Speaking of which,
[00:44] ari
    it's a shame the cafeteria has
    no finger bowls, don't you think?
[00:46] gero
    Oh, that's true.
[00:48] kusa
    Let's see if we can find room
    for it in the Student Council funds.
[00:52] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch! It makes me so happy!
[00:56] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch! Steamy hot!
[01:00] yumoto
    You gotta eat it while it's still warm!
[01:02] kusa
    The existence of such base and vulgar
    individuals here at Binan High School
[01:07] kusa
    absolutely cannot be permitted.
[01:08] gero
    In other words, you want to do something about
[01:12] gero
    the members of that Earth Defense Club thing?
[01:14] kusa
    You catch on quickly, Akoya.
SIGN    Love is Something You Wear on Your Back
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[02:54] wom
    Oh, my...
[02:59] yumoto
    An afternoon cuddle after lunch
    makes me feel so much better!
[03:01] wom
    Everyone!
[03:03] wom
    Don't you think it's strange?
SIGN    Potato Chips
[03:06] en
    What is?
[03:07] atsu
    That we pretend we don't see the cuddling?
[03:10] wom
    No! I mean the monsters!
[03:12] yumoto
    Oh? Did another one show up?
[03:14] wom
    Not that!
[03:16] wom
    Don't you think it's strange?
[03:18] wom
    They always seem to appear close to us.
[03:22] en
    Now that you mention it...
[03:23] atsu
    You think the enemy could
    be closer than we thought?
[03:26] io
    It's true, they do appear awfully
    frequently within our area of activity.
[03:30] ryuu
    Yeah, they seem to show up just
    as we start talking about them.
[03:37] gero
    Pardon me, Defense Club members.
[03:41] gero
    What is that stench?
[03:44] atsu
    Hey, Gero-kun. Can we help you?
[03:53] gero
    The truth is, I came to inform you
[03:55] gero
    that while your group has been approved as a club,
[03:59] gero
    student council rule 132 states that
[04:02] gero
    if the club members' final exam
    scores do not meet the average,
[04:06] gero
    your club will be dissolved.
[04:08] atsu
    Huh? There's a rule like that?
[04:11] gero
    It was just established.
[04:14] gero
    Well, that's all I wanted to say.
[04:17] gero
    That stench...
[04:19] gero
    Is there a dead animal here?
[04:24] en
    You've got the right idea.
[04:28] atsu
    I-Is that all you wanted?
[04:31] gero
    Yes. I'll be going, then.
[04:35] ryuu
    What are you looking at?
[04:36] gero
    Weren't you the one looking at me?
[04:42] ryuu
    Doesn't that guy have the
    wrong idea about something?
[04:45] io
    Maybe he's interested in you, Ryuu?
[04:47] ryuu
    Cut that out. It's gross.
[04:50] gero
    What is this unpleasant sensation?
[04:54] gero
    Really, I wish that club would just fall apart.
[04:58] wom
    I cannot allow it!
[04:59] wom
    The Earth Defense Club,
    so full of love, must not be dissolved!
[05:04] en
    But from their perspective,
    we must seem pretty incomprehensible.
[05:09] ryuu
    Well, that's true.
[05:10] wom
    Even so, we must prevent
    the club's dissolution!
[05:13] yumoto
    You're so passionate!
    Have your needs been building up?
[05:16] atsu
    That's you.
[05:18] wom
    Silence!
[05:19] wom
    Listen, all of you!
[05:21] wom
    You absolutely must see to it that
    your test scores beat the average!
[05:25] wom
    That is an order!
[05:34] en
    Ryuu, do you think
    you'll do okay on the finals?
[05:37] ryuu
    Nah, probably not.
[05:40] ryuu
    You've got it good, Kinugawa-senpai.
[05:42] ryuu
    You always get top scores.
[05:45] atsu
    Well, I suppose.
[05:46] atsu
    But I can't get 100s like En-chan does.
[05:50] ryuu
    Yufuin-senpai, you've
    gotten perfect scores before?
[05:52] en
    Yeah, when I successfully
    guess the subject matter.
[05:55] ryuu
    So if there's no need to worry about Io...
[05:58] en
    I guess the real problem is Yumoto.
[06:00] atsu
    Yumoto's an unknown quantity, huh?
[06:02] ryuu
    An unknown quantity?
[06:03] en
    I hear that in math, he can tell the
    area of a shape just by looking at it.
[06:07] ryuu
    Without any calculations?
[06:09] en
    No calculation at all.
[06:11] atsu
    He probably doesn't know
    the equations, after all.
[06:13] ryuu
    Wow.
[06:15] atsu
    But since his way of thinking is so unique,
[06:17] atsu
    in subjects like Japanese, he can easily get zeroes.
[06:22] yumoto
    So, how's the bath?
[06:24] en
    Yumoto, are you going to do okay on your tests?
[06:27] yumoto
    I'm not motivated at all.
[06:28] en
    Hey, hey.
[06:30] yumoto
    After all, I'm inheriting the
    family bath, so I don't need school!
[06:35] gora
    Yumoto. You must not become a man like me.
[06:39] gora
    A man good for nothing but chopping wood...
[06:42] yumoto
    Big bro...
[06:43] en
    Now, now. It's because
    your brother chops the wood
[06:46] en
    that we can enjoy the baths, after all.
[06:49] atsu
    But isn't Kurotama Bath's selling point
    that it runs off a free-flowing hot spring?
[06:55] atsu
    So it shouldn't really need firewood, right?
[06:58] ryuu
    Then what does he chop wood for?
[07:01] yumoto
    Why do you, big bro?
[07:07] yumoto
    I think the screws in my
    brother's head might be loose.
[07:10] en
    You're one to talk.
[07:11] yumoto
    Hey. Speaking of screws, do you
    know why they're called "screws"?
[07:18] ryuu
    Because you screw them in?
[07:19] yumoto
    Oh, I see!
[07:21] yumoto
    They're screws because you screw them in.
[07:23] en
    You mean that wasn't a quiz,
    just a normal question?
[07:25] yumoto
    That's amazing!
[07:27] yumoto
    Ryuu-senpai, you're amazing!
[07:30] yumoto
    The riddle I've been puzzling over
    since third grade is solved!
[07:32] yumoto
    Yay! Yay! I did it!
[07:33] ryuu
    That's too long to puzzle over something! Look it up!
[07:41] boy
    Naruko-senpai gets good grades
    and he's rich. He's amazing.
[07:45] boy
    He pretty much has no faults at all!
[07:48] boy
    H-Hey.
[07:57] itsu
    My name is Itsumo Ichiban.
SIGN    Itsumo Ichiban
[07:59] itsu
    As my name implies, my grades are "always #1."
[08:03] itsu
    But people still find me creepy because they say I sound dumb when I talk.
[08:08] itsu
    I don't particularly care, though.
[08:10] boy
    You know, Itsumo-senpai gets good grades,
[08:13] boy
    but isn't the way he talks kinda odd?
[08:14] boy
    I think he's got just one screw loose.
[08:17] itsu
    What do you mean, "kinda odd"?
[08:19] itsu
    If you think I'm creepy, just say I'm creepy.
[08:21] itsu
    And why would you say "just one screw"?
[08:24] itsu
    Why be so specific about that?
[08:25] io
    He talks to himself an awful lot.
[08:26] itsu
    Gets under my skin...
[08:29] io
    Oh, is that the time? I've got to hurry.
[08:33] gero
    Oh, pardon me.
[08:38] gero
    I've been wondering...
[08:41] gero
    Why does a man of your caliber
    associate with that bunch?
[08:45] io
    Are you talking to me?
[08:48] gero
    Of course.
[08:50] gero
    Someone like you would fit
    right in with the student council.
[08:54] io
    Is there any profit in listening to this?
SIGN    Student Council Room
[09:02] gero
    And so, I think the student council
    requires a head accountant
[09:06] gero
    who's an expert in modern finance.
[09:08] gero
    In other words, a treasurer.
[09:12] ari
    It's true that we're dealing
    with large sums of money here.
[09:16] kusa
    So, do you have any candidates?
[09:19] kusa
    They must have both the
    intelligence and refinement
[09:21] kusa
    suitable to our student council.
[09:23] gero
    Yes, I have one.
[09:32] io
    Me? Become the student council's treasurer?
[09:34] gero
    I don't think it's a bad deal at all.
[09:36] ari
    Of course, we know you're
    involved in the Defense Club, too.
[09:39] ari
    We don't expect you to answer right away.
[09:41] io
    No, I'll join.
[09:44] io
    If it will make me a profit.
[09:47] kusa
    To ask for money in exchange for a
    position on the sacred student council...
[09:52] kusa
    But that's interesting.
[09:54] kusa
    Then we will pay you adequate compensation.
[09:58] itsu
    I'm always #1 in my grade,
    so why is it #2 Naruko instead of me?
[10:03] itsu
    I can't understand it...
[10:06] gero
    Now, even if they manage
    to clear the test hurdle,
[10:09] gero
    the Defense Club will be
    left with four members.
SIGN    Wombat
    Born November 30th
     (converted to Earth calendar)
    Blood Type A (probably) / Sagittarius
    Hobby: World peace
    Likes: Love, spinach
[10:19] teach
    Okay, start your tests.
[10:23] ryuu
    Okay! Let's do this!
[10:25] io
    Didn't you say you were tired before?
[10:27] ryuu
    I am tired, but I won't sleep well if
    the club is dissolved because of me.
[10:34] itsu
    It gets under my skin so bad...
[10:36] itsu
    He's the one person I can't lose to.
[10:39] itsu
    Of course, I'm going to be #1 like always...
[10:43] teach
    Itsumo, something wrong?
SIGN    Combined Finals Rankings
[10:53] student
    Hey, what are you doing?
[10:55] student
    No pushing! What's with you?
SIGN    Score Masatou Mu Zuruwaki Chitsugi Takashin Matsuji Itsumo Ichiban Naruko Io Name
[10:58] itsu
    Wh-What is this?!
[11:00] itsu
    Th-This must not happen!
[11:04] itsu
    H-He makes money and gets #1,
[11:07] itsu
    while I do nothing but study and get #2...
[11:10] itsu
    It's unforgivable!
[11:18] kusa
    Are you all right, Lord Zundar?
[11:21] zun
    There.
[11:23] zun
    He will be our target this time!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[11:27] yumoto
    Oh, wow!
[11:28] yumoto
    I got another zero in Japanese!
[11:31] en
    That's okay, it was within expectations.
[11:33] wom
    How'd you do, Zaou-san?
[11:35] ryuu
    To be frank, I didn't reach average in anything.
[11:39] en
    It's okay.
[11:40] en
    Naruko's high grades mean our
    second year guys averaged out.
[11:44] ryuu
    Thank you, Io!
[11:46] wom
    Kinugawa-san, how about you?
[11:49] atsu
    I got about 30 points
    over the average, I suppose.
[11:52] ryuu
    Which means...
[11:53] atsu
    That doesn't completely cover for Yumoto's zero.
[11:55] atsu
    So we still haven't reached average...
[11:59] wom
    Which means everything's
    riding on Yufuin-san's results...
[12:03] atsu
    Did you guess the subject matter right?
[12:07] en
    Right on the mark!
[12:09] wom
    I-Incredible!
[12:10] ryuu
    That's our Yufuin-senpai!
[12:12] ryuu
    You're a guy who can do it when it counts!
[12:14] yumoto
    Can I take these?
[12:16] en
    What would you do with them?
[12:18] yumoto
    Keep them as heirlooms.
[12:19] en
    You don't have to do that.
[12:21] atsu
    Well, this is a relief, though.
[12:23] atsu
    Now the club won't be dissolved.
[12:25] wom
    Oh, I'm so relieved!
[12:27] io
    Hey there.
[12:28] ryuu
    Hey, Io! Looks like our club won't be dissolved.
[12:33] io
    That's great to hear.
[12:35] io
    Oh, but I'm quitting the Defense Club.
[12:39] io
    They said they'd provide me with compensation,
[12:40] io
    so I decided to join the student council.
[12:43] io
    Considering my side business,
[12:44] io
    I won't have any time left for club activities,
[12:46] io
    so I thought I'd just quit.
[12:49] io
    So, that said, I'll be going now.
[13:00] ryuu
    Hang on, Io!
[13:02] io
    Is something wrong?
[13:05] ryuu
    "Is something wrong," my ass!
    What's this all about?
[13:10] io
    It means that money is important.
[13:13] io
    Money doesn't betray.
[13:16] ryuu
    But you do betray?!
[13:25] en
    I guess this screams "youth."
[13:28] yumoto
    Did something happen?
[13:30] wom
    This is an emergency situation!
[13:33] atsu
    Even though we cleared the test hurdle,
[13:34] atsu
    if Io quits, the club will be dissolved
[13:37] atsu
    for no longer having five members.
[13:41] wom
    Oh, sole mio!
[13:43] wom
    What should we do?!
[13:46] yumoto
    It's here! A monster!
[13:48] monster
    Screw screw screw...
[13:50] monster
    Screw screw screw...
[13:53] yumoto
    It's saying "screw"!
    That must be a Screw Monster!
[13:57] en
    Another odd one...
[13:58] atsu
    I can't tell by looking at it
    whether it's strong or weak.
[14:01] wom
    Now, everyone, transform!
[14:04] yumoto
    Oh, but should we call Io-senpai?
[14:06] ryuu
    No need for that!
[14:09] ryuu
    We don't need Io here.
    I could beat that monster by myself!
[14:12] ryuu
    Let's go!
[14:13] yumoto
    Wow, you're raring to go! I'll follow you!
[14:17] en
    Good grief, this again?
[14:19] atsu
    Now, don't say that.
[14:21] wom
    It's time to Love Making
    into the Battle Lovers!
[14:24] yumoto
    Love Making!
[14:52] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[14:53] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[14:56] en
    Love Making.
[15:06] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[15:08] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[15:10] atsu
    Love Making!
[15:20] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[15:22] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[15:25] ryuu
    Love Making!
[15:35] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[15:36] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[15:39] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[15:42] four
    Of love!
[15:45] monster
    Screw screw screw!
[15:49] yumoto
    Hold it, Screw Monster!
[15:50] monster
    Screw! Screw screw!
[15:54] ryuu
    Okay, let's go!
[15:57] ryuu
    Even without Sulfur here...
[15:58] ryuu
    I'll face you myself!
[16:00] monster
    Screw screw screw!
[16:03] monster
    Screw!
[16:05] ryuu
    Darn it!
[16:07] monster
    Screw!
[16:09] monster
    I'm gonna screw you up good!
[16:16] monster
    Screw, screw...
[16:17] monster
    Tickle tickle tickle!
[16:22] ryuu
    Hey! Stop it! Cut that out!
[16:25] monster
    Tickle tickle tickle!
[16:27] en
    What's with that monster?
[16:30] atsu
    Its attacks are so stupid.
[16:32] yumoto
    Maybe, being a screw monster,
    it's got just one screw loose?
[16:38] yumoto
    Vesta's crying!
[16:40] atsu
    Yeah, being tickled makes
    him cry for some reason.
[16:44] en
    That's just humiliating.
[16:48] io
    Being that ticklish...
[16:50] io
    He's playing right into the enemy's hands!
[16:58] io
    Love Making.
[17:08] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[17:10] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:14] yumoto
    Darn you...
[17:19] io
    Take your filthy hands off him.
[17:22] atsu
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:24] io
    I will not tolerate you touching Vesta!
[17:27] monster
    Screw?
[17:28] yumoto
    So cool!
[17:47] itsu
    Th-That hurt...
[17:49] yumoto
    Did you see that?
[17:50] yumoto
    Even if Vesta fails,
    Sulfur will cover for him!
[17:54] yumoto
    When the two of them are
    together, they're unbeatable!
[17:56] yumoto
    That's the kind of team we are!
[17:59] en
    Are you in any place to talk?
[18:00] atsu
    You're the one we have
    to cover for most of all.
[18:02] yumoto
    You should make friends, too! Don't be alone!
[18:06] monster
    I-I would if I could...
[18:10] yumoto
    In that case, I'll be your friend!
[18:14] yumoto
    Okay, let's go!
[18:17] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[18:19] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[18:22] atsu
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[18:24] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[18:39] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[18:50] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[19:00] monster
    Thank you for being my friend...
[19:05] monster
    I'm so happy.
[19:11] yumoto
    Love is over!
[19:18] ari
    I can't believe we lost.
[19:22] gero
    Battle Lovers...
[19:23] gero
    You'll pay!
[19:25] gero
    You will never get away with this!
[19:27] atsu
    Is that... our enemy?
[19:29] ryuu
    Their faces are blurred out, though.
    Their voices, too.
[19:34] io
    Does that mean they have the same
    advanced camouflage skill we do?
[19:40] ryuu
    Some outfits.
[19:42] en
    Looks like a cosplay contest.
[19:44] atsu
    They're probably saying the same about us.
[19:47] gero
    You people are lacking in beauty.
    Too lacking in beauty!
[19:51] yumoto
    What's with you guys? Who are you?
[19:54] kusa
    How rude of us.
[19:57] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier, shining in radiance!
[19:59] kusa
    Aurite!
[20:01] ari
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[20:03] ari
    Argent!
[20:05] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[20:08] gero
    Perlite!
[20:10] trio
    We are the rulers of this blue world...
[20:13] trio
    Caerula Adamas!
[20:16] yumoto
    Kaeru (frog)?
[20:18] ari
    Well, shall we leave it at that for now?
[20:22] gero
    Commanders can't be
    expected to fight, after all.
[20:24] kusa
    The next time we meet will be the end of you.
[20:28] kusa
    You'd do well to prepare for it.
[20:33] atsu
    They introduced themselves then left...
[20:35] en
    Lucky us. You can't talk
    to people like that anyway.
[20:40] ryuu
    Weren't you a bit late?
[20:41] io
    I'm sorry.
[20:43] io
    I was calculating the profit margin
    I'd achieve if I joined the student council.
[20:47] ryuu
    So, which did you determine was more profitable?
[20:50] io
    I can't tell you that.
[20:53] ryuu
    You should be able to do a calculation
    like that in your head immediately!
[20:55] yumoto
    I guess we're back to normal, huh?
[20:57] ryuu
    What took you so long?!
[20:57] en
    Let's go home. I'm tired.
[20:58] io
    Well, figuring in the rate of
    fluctuation made it difficult...
[20:59] atsu
    I want to get changed.
[21:02] wom
    Well, that settles that!
[21:11] gero
    So, in the end, Naruko-kun turned us down.
[21:14] ari
    So the Defense Club will continue on?
[21:16] kusa
    Enough. This topic is not suitable for lunchtime.
[21:20] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch! It makes me so happy!
[21:24] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch!
[21:26] yumoto
    You gotta eat it while it's still warm!
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:34] yumoto
    How's the water feel?
[21:35] en
    It's perfect.
[21:37] yumoto
    Big bro! He says the water's perfect!
[21:40] atsu
    No, but really, this is a natural hot spring.
[21:44] atsu
    He's not preserving the
    heat by chopping wood...
[21:46] ryuu
    To be honest, there's
    zero point in chopping wood.
[21:48] io
    I don't understand him at all.
[21:50] yumoto
    No, when I look at my
    big brother's back, I know.
[21:54] yumoto
    He's not a man good for
    nothing but chopping wood.
[21:56] yumoto
    Chopping wood is just what he loves!
[21:59] yumoto
    I want to become a man who throws
    himself into what he loves, just like him.
[23:40] wom
    Just because it's summer,
    you're going to the beach? Really...
[23:43] wom
    Just what do you think your
    duty as the Battle Lovers is?!
[23:47] wom
    What? Mr. Tawarayama is missing!
[23:50] wom
    Next time: Love, Training Camp,
    and Toothbrushes.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes
[23:53] wom
    Love Making!

7 - Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Binan High School Sakashita
[00:08] yumoto
    The other guys sure are late!
[00:10] en
    What's with his outfit?
[00:13] atsu
    Makes it hard to shout, "Sorry
    for the wait!" and run up to him.
[00:15] ryuu
    He's a grade schooler. A grade schooler
    who can't wait to get to the ocean.
[00:18] io
    Actually, you can't ride a train
    without a shirt on, can you?
[00:22] io
    It's criminal indecent exposure.
[00:24] ryuu
    We don't have a choice. Let's get him dressed.
[00:28] yumoto
    You're late, senpai!
[00:30] en
    No, we've been here a while.
[00:32] en
    We just didn't have the
    courage to call out to you.
[00:35] ryuu
    Anyway, put something on.
[00:37] atsu
    By the way, where's Wombat?
[00:39] wombat
    My, my! Sorry for the wait, everyone!
[00:42] en
    Oh, he's here.
[00:43] yumoto
    Wom-san!
[00:44] atsu
    Even in this heat, you want to handle him?
[00:47] yumoto
    The urge to cuddle isn't restricted by the season!
[00:51] atsu
    That sounds rough.
SIGN    Love, Training Camp, and Toothbrushes
[02:34] yumoto
    So good! Kakinotane are so good!
[02:38] atsu
    It's been hot every day.
    Will Mr. Tawarayama be okay?
[02:41] wom
    Of course, that's why I brought him.
[02:44] ryuu
    The FX again?
[02:45] io
    No, I'm checking out an online lodging service.
[02:49] io
    You should be able to get a discount
    if you register your email address.
[02:53] ryuu
    That's our Io.
[02:54] en
    Remind me.
[02:56] en
    Why did we end up going to a training
    camp in this terrible heat, again?
[03:00] atsu
    Hey, come on.
SIGN    Active Summer
    Travel!
[03:04] en
    Hey. Let's go to the ocean.
[03:07] both
    Ocean!
[03:10] en
    Oh, really? I proposed it?
[03:12] yumoto
    What's wrong with a training camp?
[03:15] yumoto
    It's the ocean! The ocean!
[03:16] atsu
    There'll be a hot spring there, too.
[03:18] ryuu
    No female presence, though.
[03:20] gero
    The peasants do love their trains, don't they?
[03:22] gero
    But a limousine is so much more luxurious.
[03:24] ari
    I think they take trains because they don't
    have limousines, not because they like it.
[03:28] gero
    Really?
[03:29] gero
    But I still don't like traveling by train.
[03:33] gero
    What about you, President?
[03:34] kusa
    I have no objection to traveling by train.
[03:37] kusa
    However, it should at least be chartered.
[03:40] gero
    That's right.
[03:41] gero
    Would you like some special selection Kakinotane?
[03:44] kusa
    I would.
[03:46] yumoto
    Ocean!
[03:49] yumoto
    It's the ocean! The ocean!
[03:50] ryuu
    We know. You don't have to shout.
[03:53] en
    Well, you've got the blinding
    sun and the white sand, but...
[03:57] en
    Is it just my imagination,
    or is something a bit odd?
[04:03] ryuu
    It's all dudes.
[04:05] io
    You're right. Why is it all men here?
[04:08] en
    Is this actually "that kind of place"?
[04:11] yumoto
    What's "that kind of place"?
[04:12] en
    Hey, Atsushi. You're the one
    who chose this place, right?
[04:15] yumoto
    You were?
[04:17] atsu
    Well, see...
[04:19] atsu
    Let's see. Danran Beach... Danran Beach...
[04:23] atsu
    "Danran" as in "happy family" Beach...
[04:26] atsu
    I was sure it was in this area...
[04:27] macho
    Hey, buddy!
[04:29] macho
    Are you looking for a beach?
[04:31] atsu
    Uh, yeah.
[04:32] macho
    Let me show you!
[04:36] atsu
    Th-Thank you...
SIGN    Welcome to Danran (Wild Man) Beach
[04:40] atsu
    It was the wrong Danran...
[04:42] en
    Be aware of this stuff.
[04:43] atsu
    Sorry.
[04:44] io
    The name by itself sounds very family-oriented.
[04:46] ryuu
    No wonder it lacks in female presence.
[04:49] yumoto
    So? What's wrong with this place?
[04:52] yumoto
    There's not too many people,
    and the ocean is beautiful!
[04:54] wom
    My first trip to the ocean!
[04:57] wom
    It's a wonderful beach, isn't it?
[05:15] yumoto
    Ocean!
[05:17] gero
    This would be the perfect resort,
    if not for all that vulgar noise.
[05:21] gero
    It's a shame, isn't it?
[05:23] kusa
    Clear the mind of mundane thoughts,
[05:25] kusa
    and you can block out even the basest of noises.
[05:28] ari
    That's our Kinshiro.
[05:29] ari
    You're strict with yourself even at a resort, eh?
[05:31] [SONG] sign
     Ice Beach Shop Danran Takoyaki, Yakisoba, Frankfurters
[05:37] macho
    Hey, buddy, you sure can put
    'em down! Wanna try for another?
[05:40] tawara
    Let's go! Let's go!
[05:41] tawra
    And another for my wombat!
[05:43] wom
    Squeak! Squeak!
[05:45] macho
    So cute!
[05:47] yumoto
    I want to cuddle him, too...
[05:49] host
    Hello there.
[05:51] host
    Well, cutie pie, have you decided on your order?
[05:55] yumoto
    Wow! You're so cool, Miss...
[05:59] yumoto
    Umm... Mister?
[06:00] host
    "Miss" is just fine.
[06:02] yumoto
    Got it! Then I'll have a rainbow frappé, Miss!
[06:06] host
    And is that all?
[06:07] yumoto
    Yeah!
[06:08] host
    We've got many far more amazing things.
[06:12] host
    Far more amazing.
[06:13] yumoto
    Really?!
[06:15] ryuu
    Is it okay to leave them like that?
[06:18] en
    My instincts are telling me
    not to go near that place.
[06:22] atsu
    En-chan, I think you could fit right in.
[06:25] io
    You can make a favorable impression by
    offering things at below market value.
[06:28] atsu
    Anyway, are you guys hungry?
[06:30] en
    Yeah. Let's go to the inn.
SIGN    Inn Tamakuro Bath
[06:35] yumoto
    Tamakuro Bath?
[06:36] ryuu
    I'm getting an incredible sense of déjà vu.
[06:38] yumoto
    Yeah. It looks just like the Kurotama Bath!
[06:41] atsu
    This was the only place
    with vacancies this weekend.
[06:44] en
    This doesn't feel fresh at all.
[06:46] io
    Are they cutting corners?
[06:47] atsu
    Don't say that!
[06:51] wom
    Well, shall we get going?
[06:56] yumoto
    Sleepover!
[06:57] yumoto
    We owe you for a night's stay and a meal!
[07:00] en
    Not bad, eh?
[07:01] ryuu
    But isn't it a bit small for all of us?
[07:03] io
    No. We'll only be sleeping here,
    so it should be fine.
[07:06] en
    Yeah.
[07:12] kusa
    Not bad, I'd say.
[07:13] ari
    I'm sorry it's so small.
    It's the only room they had left.
[07:16] gero
    We each have our own bedroom, right?
[07:18] ari
    Of course.
[07:19] gero
    Then there's no problem!
SIGN    Men
SIGN    Large
    Bath
[07:23] en
    Nothing new here, either.
[07:25] io
    In fact, it's exactly what we always do.
[07:27] ryuu
    Doesn't feel like we've traveled at all.
[07:29] atsu
    Sorry.
[07:31] en
    It's not your fault, Atsushi.
[07:32] io
    This actually makes it more relaxing.
[07:34] ryuu
    Isn't it funny how similar it looks?
[07:36] en
    There may even be other similarities.
[07:38] yumoto
    If I open this door...
[07:40] yumoto
    Maybe my brother Goro will be there!
[07:42] atsu
    No way.
[07:43] yumoto
    There!
[07:45] yumoto
    Wow!
[07:46] yumoto
    An open-air bath!
[07:47] wom
    What?!
[07:50] en
    An unexpected development.
[07:51] atsu
    Want to check it out?
[07:52] en
    Of course.
[07:54] en
    This is nice!
[07:55] ryuu
    They should have a sign out for this.
[08:01] io
    Everyone!
[08:03] io
    There's been an incident.
[08:04] yumoto
    A murder?!
[08:06] atsu
    Now, now. This isn't Detective C*nan.
[08:08] yumoto
    I guess...
[08:09] io
    Someone has used my toothbrush!
[08:14] ryuu
    Toothbrush?
[08:15] io
    Yes.
[08:16] io
    My toothbrush!
[08:26] io
    This is a criminal act.
[08:29] io
    It can be called nothing but a criminal act!
[08:32] io
    This was no mistake.
[08:34] io
    Someone used my toothbrush on purpose!
[08:37] en
    No, no, it was probably just a mistake.
[08:40] ryuu
    That's right. You're overthinking it, Io.
[08:42] io
    Are you sure?
[08:44] io
    If any of you were in my position right now,
[08:46] io
    you would be able to understand this
    unparalleled feeling of discomfort!
[08:50] io
    Try to imagine it.
[08:52] io
    Someone has intentionally used your toothbrush.
[08:55] io
    What's more, they didn't even wash it afterwards.
[08:57] io
    They treated it coarsely, as if they wanted
    the victim to discover the signs of its use!
[09:01] atsu
    I probably wouldn't like that.
[09:02] en
    Yeah, I wouldn't like it.
[09:04] ryuu
    There are only men here, after all.
[09:06] wom
    It wasn't me!
[09:08] en
    What's with the sudden flag?
[09:10] wom
    I'm merely telling the truth.
[09:12] wom
    First of all, I'd never do such a monstrous
    thing with Mr. Tawarayama right here.
[09:17] atsu
    But you're just controlling him, aren't you?
[09:19] tawara
    I am absolutely not being controlled.
[09:21] en
    You're a corpse.
[09:22] wom
    I told you, he's not dead yet!
[09:24] yumoto
    I use an electric frog toothbrush!
[09:27] io
    Are you people trying to change the subject?
[09:29] atsu
    I haven't brushed my teeth yet.
[09:31] ryuu
    Same.
[09:32] en
    Me, either.
[09:34] io
    Very well.
[09:35] io
    Then, everyone face me and go, "Hah!"
[09:39] io
    "Hah!"
[09:40] yumoto
    Hah?
[09:41] io
    If you've brushed your teeth,
[09:43] io
    there should still be the faint scent
    of toothpaste on your breath!
[09:46] ryuu
    That makes sense.
[09:47] en
    But why do you care so much if
    a toothbrush or two gets used?
[09:51] yumoto
    I agree!
[09:53] ryuu
    But don't you see why
    Io would feel conflicted?
[09:56] ryuu
    Someone used his toothbrush on purpose.
[09:58] ryuu
    It's like getting tricked into an indirect kiss.
[10:00] yumoto
    Oh, that's like when you secretly play
    the recorder of someone you like, right?
[10:05] io
    Yes. That's exactly it.
[10:07] atsu
    That really would be rough.
[10:09] io
    It is very rough!
[10:11] io
    Especially if the criminal
    turns out to be one of us here!
[10:17] en
    Really?
[10:18] en
    I wouldn't care that much, personally.
[10:21] io
    Yufuin-senpai.
[10:22] io
    I've noticed that all this time,
[10:25] io
    you've been trying to shrug this
    problem off as much as possible.
[10:29] io
    Are you afraid of something
    coming out if you're questioned?
[10:33] en
    Huh? Hey, what's with this vibe?
[10:37] en
    You're acting like I secretly used Naruko's toothbrush
[10:40] en
    and now I'm over the moon about it or something.
[10:42] wom
    It's not unthinkable.
[10:45] wom
    My observations tell me that you're a person
[10:48] wom
    who could be classified as a
    loose individual in many respects.
[10:53] wom
    Particularly in regard to morality.
[10:55] en
    Hey, now. This is getting weird.
[10:58] atsu
    Of course, if En-chan could be called gray,
[11:01] atsu
    Ryuu isn't exactly pure white, either.
[11:03] ryuu
    Me?
[11:04] atsu
    Ryuu, you claim to love women,
[11:06] atsu
    but I've never actually seen
    you with a woman before.
[11:09] atsu
    Let's be honest. You like Io, right?
[11:12] ryuu
    Gross!
[11:13] ryuu
    It's gross when you put it that way.
[11:15] ryuu
    I consider Io my buddy, so he's, I mean...
[11:20] ryuu
    It's not that kind of...
[11:21] io
    Ryuu... Was it you?
[11:25] ryuu
    Io...
[11:27] ryuu
    Okay, this really is getting weird!
[11:30] ryuu
    Do something, Yumoto!
[11:32] yumoto
    I don't see why it matters
    whose toothbrush you use!
[11:35] io
    Stop passing the conversation to Yumoto.
[11:38] io
    We're getting off topic!
[11:39] ryuu
    Sorry.
[11:40] atsu
    Anyway, the question is, can we assume
    that someone among us has eyes for Io?
[11:46] en
    You can sum it up like that,
    but you're a suspect, too, Atsushi.
[11:51] ryuu
    That's true.
[11:52] ryuu
    Kinugawa-senpai, I've seen you
    look at Io in a rather odd way before.
[11:55] atsu
    No, no, no, no...
[12:00] yumoto
    I'm pruning. Can we get out now?
[12:04] en
    Good idea.
[12:08] en
    They're rather close... the futons.
[12:10] atsu
    Yeah.
[12:11] atsu
    I don't know about sleeping this close
    to you guys under these circumstances...
[12:15] ryuu
    Why are you acting like a victim here?
[12:18] ryuu
    Yufuin-senpai, Kinugawa-senpai,
    you're both incredibly gray individuals.
[12:21] io
    That's right.
[12:24] yumoto
    But we can't sleep yet, huh?
[12:27] yumoto
    We should keep having fun!
[12:28] yumoto
    Like a pillow fight, or a test of courage!
[12:31] yumoto
    It's a training camp! We've gotta do it!
[12:32] ryuu
    You really are a grade schooler.
[12:34] en
    It amazes me that you can think about
    having fun in these circumstances.
[12:39] yumoto
    Well, shall we start with the test of courage?
[12:42] io
    We didn't even have a
    conversation, let alone a debate.
[12:46] en
    Yeah.
[12:48] yumoto
    Pass through the forest next to the inn.
[12:50] yumoto
    That lit-up tree is the goal!
[12:54] yumoto
    Everyone, do you have your map
    and flashlights from the inn?
[12:58] all
    Yes.
[13:00] atsu
    We're really doing this, huh?
[13:02] en
    We've got lights, after all.
[13:03] ryuu
    Well, I don't think I could sleep with
    that weird feeling hanging over us anyway.
[13:07] io
    I absolutely can't sleep.
[13:08] io
    Not until I find the culprit
    who used my toothbrush.
[13:12] en
    But when you think about it,
[13:14] en
    should we have a test of courage
    in these circumstances?
[13:17] io
    What do you mean?
[13:18] en
    Well, it happens a lot, you know?
[13:28] en
    That kind of thing.
[13:30] io
    I see.
[13:31] ryuu
    I'm not gonna hug anyone!
[13:33] yumoto
    Okay, let's get started!
[13:35] io
    Listen to what we're saying here!
[13:36] atsu
    Saying that to Yumoto won't do any good.
[13:39] en
    True.
[13:45] gero
    The beachside this afternoon...
[13:47] gero
    Is there really nothing we can do about it?
[13:49] kuso
    If it bothers you that much,
[13:51] kuso
    shall I talk to the owners and
    buy up the surrounding beaches?
[13:55] ari
    Strong words, those are.
[13:57] ari
    Shall we get out of the
    bath and have some tea?
[14:04] atsu
    It's pitch black, huh?
[14:05] en
    Atsushi. You're too close.
[14:08] atsu
    Sorry. I just got scared.
[14:10] en
    So he says, but I bet he got close on purpose.
[14:13] atsu
    Is En-chan being overly aware of my presence?
[14:18] atsu
    Wh-What?!
[14:20] en
    Sorry, I tripped over a rock.
[14:23] en
    Hey, Atsushi, are you eating properly?
[14:26] en
    Your waist is really thin.
[14:28] atsu
    My waist is thin?
[14:30] atsu
    En-chan, you really are...
[14:32] en
    Crap...
[14:33] en
    I totally should not have said that...
[14:41] ryuu
    Woah, scary.
[14:43] ryuu
    It really does feel like a ghost will show up.
[14:45] io
    Living people are far scarier.
[14:47] io
    They do things like using people's toothbrushes.
[14:49] ryuu
    Yeah, but still...
[14:50] ryuu
    I really don't handle this kind of thing well.
[14:53] io
    He's sticking so close to me...
[14:56] io
    Is Ryuu's womanizing just camouflage, after all?
[15:00] ryuu
    If only I were with a cute girl here...
[15:03] ryuu
    But then I'd want her doing this to me...
[15:08] ari
    Hey, I know. You want to try taking a shortcut?
[15:11] ari
    Huh? Kinshiro? Akoya?
[15:15] [SONG] sign
    Private Property
    Keep Out
    -Danran Resort
[15:21] yumoto
    Feels good!
[15:23] yumoto
    The cuddles that you have regardless of
    who might be watching are so amazing.
[15:28] wom
    Th-That was awful... You beast!
[15:31] yumoto
    I cuddle when I want to!
[15:33] yumoto
    That's the condition for joining
    the Battle Lovers, isn't it?
[15:36] wom
    I never agreed to that.
[15:38] yumoto
    Now, let's go!
[15:39] wom
    How self-serving you are...
[15:48] yumoto
    He's gone.
[15:50] yumoto
    Hey! Where are you?
[15:53] yumoto
    I'm gonna leave you behind!
[15:55] gero
    Could it be...
[15:57] gero
    that I'm lost?
[15:59] gero
    Arima will make fun of me...
[16:03] kusa
    I've been careless.
[16:06] kusa
    How could I fall behind the other two?
[16:11] wom
    I must have lost consciousness...
[16:14] wom
    M-Mr. Tawarayama?!
[16:18] wom
    Where did you go?!
[16:20] tam
    Where am I? And in a yukata, at that?
[16:23] tam
    I'm sure I was just preparing tests at school...
[16:27] atsu
    Huh? I thought I saw a flash.
[16:30] en
    Probably a camera.
[16:32] en
    I had my suspicions about him.
[16:34] atsu
    Who?
[16:36] en
    The toothbrush incident, this development...
[16:38] en
    It's all seemed too odd to me.
[16:40] atsu
    It's true that this sort of thing
    would never happen normally.
[16:43] en
    Which means...
[16:45] atsu
    Wombat...
[16:46] en
    Let's take him to task.
[16:51] taw
    What's going on?!
[16:57] taw
    Wh-Why is this happening?
[17:01] io
    Did you hear something?
[17:02] ryuu
    Behind us, right?
[17:04] io
    Yes.
[17:05] ryuu
    A m-molester?
[17:06] io
    Why would you think that?
[17:08] ryuu
    Well, there was that "unique" beach back there...
[17:11] ryuu
    And we're pretty hot guys, you know?
[17:13] io
    Well, I suppose if I had to classify us,
    we'd be on the hot side.
[17:16] ryuu
    Right?
[17:17] ryuu
    So it must have been the molester
    who used your toothbrush.
[17:21] ryuu
    It's obvious that no one in our group
    would do something like that!
[17:24] io
    You have a point.
[17:26] ryuu
    Let's catch him and take him to task!
[17:28] io
    Good idea.
[17:29] taw
    Was I dead, perhaps?
[17:32] taw
    My body feels rather numb,
    there's not much feeling...
[17:36] taw
    S-Someone save me!
[17:44] en
    Okay, on three.
[17:47] atsu
    Yeah.
[17:51] ryuu
    Okay, on three.
[17:54] io
    Right.
[17:55] both
    One, two...
[17:56] all
    Three!
[18:06] io
    Did you catch the molester?
[18:11] ryuu
    Why are you guys here?
[18:12] gero
    Who are you calling a molester?
[18:15] gero
    And you're heavy!
[18:17] en
    Mr. President.
[18:19] en
    You smell nice. Fresh out of the bath?
[18:22] kusa
    Remove yourself from me at once!
[18:24] en
    Sure, sorry.
[18:28] atsu
    You okay?
[18:32] kusa
    Aside from an extreme feeling of discomfort.
[18:37] io
    Can you stand?
[18:39] gero
    I'm fine.
[18:42] io
    There's a leaf stuck on you.
[18:45] ryuu
    Why are you turning red?
[18:47] gero
    Sh-Shut up!
[18:49] atsu
    What are you doing here?
[18:51] kusa
    What are you all doing here?
[18:53] en
    Defense Club training camp.
[18:55] kusa
    I wasn't asking you!
[18:57] ari
    Huh?
[18:58] ari
    What's all this?
[19:00] ari
    What are you all doing here together?
[19:01] kusa
    Never mind. It's all meaningless.
[19:03] kusa
    I don't want to think about it.
[19:05] kusa
    I'm erasing it from my memory.
[19:07] gero
    Hey, President, wait for us!
[19:10] ari
    I have no idea what's going on, but bye!
[19:12] io
    What are they doing here?
[19:14] atsu
    It's a mystery.
[19:16] en
    There was a weird vibe to those guys, too.
[19:20] yumoto
    Everyone's taking so long!
[19:22] yumoto
    Even Wom-san ran away.
[19:24] yumoto
    Nothing to do.
[19:26] atsu
    I really do suspect Wombat, though.
[19:28] en
    He's an alien, after all.
[19:30] ryuu
    I'm still pushing the molester theory.
[19:32] io
    Rejected.
[19:33] ryuu
    Huh?
[19:35] yumoto
    I've been waiting forever!
[19:37] ryuu
    Sorry, sorry.
[19:38] atsu
    A lot of things happened.
[19:43] taw
    Are those my students?
[19:46] taw
    Hey!
[19:55] yumoto
    A monster!
[19:57] yumoto
    Let's Love Making!
[20:00] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[20:03] five
    Battle Lovers!
[20:05] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[20:07] five
    Of love!
[20:10] yumoto
    Take this, monster!
[20:25] wom
    No! Don't do that!
[20:27] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[20:38] taw
    What's going on?!
[20:49] yumoto
    Huh? Mr. Tawarayama?
[20:52] io
    So it wasn't a monster?
[20:54] ryuu
    I guess Tawarayama was the monster.
[20:56] atsu
    To be honest, it was so dark,
    I couldn't really see...
[20:59] en
    We kinda got carried away there.
[21:01] wom
    Tawarayama-san! Are you okay?
[21:03] en
    It's fine. He was dead already anyway.
[21:06] atsu
    Was this your doing?
[21:08] io
    If you're going to scare us,
    at least do it properly.
[21:10] wom
    Um...
[21:11] ryuu
    Say "boo" or something.
[21:13] io
    That's too old-fashioned.
[21:15] ryuu
    It was just one example!
[21:17] yumoto
    I'm so sleepy. Let's go home.
[21:21] ryuu
    You're the one who wanted
    to do the test of courage!
[21:23] atsu
    Well, let's go back anyway.
[21:25] en
    Yeah.
[21:26] io
    More importantly, I want to know
    who used my toothbrush!
[21:30] en
    You're still stuck on that?
[21:32] atsu
    Let's go, Yumoto.
[21:33] yumoto
    Okay...
[21:34] io
    I will not sleep until we resolve
    the matter of my toothbrush!
[21:37] wom
    Um... Everyone...
[21:40] wom
    Please help me... Please...
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[21:50] wom
    They're a bit blurry from the camera shaking...
[21:53] wom
    But it's nice to gain new memories like this.
[21:58] wom
    Though things got a bit hairy at the end there.
[22:02] wom
    Th-This is...
SIGN    Delete this photo?
    Yes | No
[23:40] kusa
    "Friendship!"
[23:41] kusa
    There is nothing more
    transient and fragile than this.
[23:45] kusa
    Now, let us sever the bonds between people,
[23:48] kusa
    and plunge the world into despair!
[23:51] kusa
    Next time: Love Wanders!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love Wanders!
[23:53] kusa
    Conquest!

8 - Love Wanders

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Keep out!
[00:10] komi
    My name is Komi Shou.
SIGN    Komi Shou
[00:13] komi
    I'm a second year student at Binan High School,
[00:15] komi
    but for certain reasons, I became a shut-in.
SIGN    12. Anonymous Shut-in
    I hate it when people talk to
    me when I'm clearly reading
SIGN    22. Anonymous Shut-in
    It's funny how they
    always come late to meetings
SIGN    23. Anonymous Shut-in
    My friend's really picky
    about food, won't eat any meat
SIGN    32. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>23
    He probably has another
    reason for that, right?
SIGN    50. Anonymous Shut-in
    Everyone around me are good people.
    They're all working really hard.
SIGN    51. Anonymous Shut-in
    Oh, that's cool ^^
SIGN    65. Anonymous Shut-in
    Friends are a pain in the ass anyway.
    I cut myself off from them (lololololol)
[00:23] komi
    Are you me?
SIGN    65. Anonymous Shut-in
    Friends are a pain in the ass anyway.
    I cut myself off from them (lololololol)
SIGN    168. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>65
    Good for you, loner
SIGN    67. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>65
    Mop up those tears
SIGN    69. Anonymous Shut-in
    Don't get desperate on us...
SIGN    71. Anonymous Shut-in
    >>65
    You should probably take
    another look at yourself
SIGN    72. Anonymous Shut-in
    What happened, anyway?
SIGN    79. Anonymous Shut-in
    Probably nothing.
    I bet he's just sulking.
SIGN    83. Anonymous Shut-in
    Bet his friends were relieved, too.
SIGN    84. Anonymous Shut-in
    True
[00:35] komi
    Damn it! Damn it!
[00:36] komi
    Who needs friends?!
    I'm better off without them!
[00:41] komi
    I don't need...
[00:49] ari
    Good evening.
[00:53] komi
    I-I-Intruders!
[00:55] kusa
    We are not intruders.
[00:57] zun
    We are conquerors!
[00:59] zun
    Now, release the Zundar Needle!
[01:04] trio
    Donum!
[01:14] komi
    I... I'll tear it all apart...
[01:17] komi
    That friendship crap...
[01:19] komi
    I'll tear it limb from limb!
SIGN    Love Wanders
[03:02] en
    Damn, if I'm late today,
    I'll get called to the faculty office.
[03:06] atsu
    So run faster, then!
SIGN    Delicious Life Campaign♥
[03:09] en
    Hey, sorry. Hang on a minute.
[03:12] en
    I'm gonna buy some bread.
[03:13] atsu
    Oh, what the heck?
SIGN    Delicious Life Campaign♥
[03:16] atsu
    I'm going on without you!
SIGN    Fresh-Baked Cream Bread
[03:42] en
    Don't leave me behind!
[03:44] atsu
    You scared me!
[03:45] en
    I felt so alone!
[03:46] atsu
    But I was going to be late!
[03:48] en
    So you're saying you don't care if I'm late?
[03:50] atsu
    But that's why I waited.
[03:51] en
    You didn't wait! You went!
[03:53] atsu
    I waited by walking slowly!
[03:56] atsu
    What's with you? This is a
    weird thing to pick a fight over.
[03:59] en
    You've been really cold lately.
[04:02] atsu
    What are you basing that on?
[04:04] atsu
    Didn't we have the most fun in history
    together over summer vacation?
[04:07] en
    Or maybe we actually got a little too close?
[04:10] atsu
    Why are you talking like such a pain in the ass?
[04:12] en
    That's right.
[04:14] en
    I guess I am a pain in the ass.
[04:17] atsu
    What's with you, En-chan?
[04:18] atsu
    Did you eat some poisonous
    mushrooms or something?
[04:21] en
    Just...
[04:22] en
    Stay away from me.
[04:24] ---
    Hey...
[04:25] atsu
    Wait!
[04:26] en
    Don't come this way!
[04:27] atsu
    I have to! I'm going to school, too!
[04:35] teach
    Kinugawa, you're late.
[04:36] atsu
    Oh, sorry.
[04:38] teach
    Anyway, never forget to check your own work.
[04:41] teach
    But at the same time, be prompt in—
[04:43] atsu
    Teacher! My stomach hurts,
    so I'm going to the nurse's office!
[04:46] teach
    Right after you got here?!
[04:47] atsu
    Did I do something wrong?
[04:53] en
    Not really.
[04:55] atsu
    Then is there a reason you said that stuff?
[04:58] en
    Not really.
[04:59] atsu
    Is it because the last time you came over,
[05:01] atsu
    I spent the whole time doing a jigsaw puzzle?
[05:03] en
    Not really.
[05:04] atsu
    "Not really" doesn't tell me anything.
[05:09] atsu
    Hey, c'mon!
[05:10] en
    Just leave me alone already!
[05:12] en
    It's really suffocating when you do that!
[05:18] atsu
    Fine.
[05:29] yumoto
    Box lunch! Box lunch!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[05:35] en
    Disappear!
[05:39] en
    Someone kill me!
[05:39] ryuu
    Hey, what are you standing there for?
[05:42] ryuu
    Whoa, what's he doing?
[05:43] io
    Is this a new exercise of some kind?
[05:46] four
    A fight?!
[05:48] ryuu
    With Kinugawa-senpai,
    who you're always so close with?
[05:50] io
    How come?
[05:51] en
    I don't know. Maybe it's menopause?
[05:54] io
    Your face does look old,
    but isn't it a bit early for that?
[05:56] en
    They say men go through
    menopause too, you know.
[05:58] ryuu
    You're not even sure if you're
    done with puberty yet.
[06:00] en
    Oh, I want to disappear!
[06:02] ryuu
    See, that kind of thing is definitely puberty.
[06:04] yumoto
    Why not just say you're sorry and make up?
[06:08] en
    It's nice that you can
    take everything so lightly.
[06:10] wom
    I agree that a prompt
    apology is the best strategy!
[06:14] wom
    Spaces without love render the heart empty!
[06:17] en
    Even Wombat is lecturing me...
[06:22] en
    That pitch... He's coming!
[06:28] ryuu
    Yo.
[06:29] io
    Hello there.
[06:30] atsu
    Hey.
[06:31] yumoto
    Lunch?
[06:32] yumoto
    I'm about to get started, too!
[06:34] ryuu
    Yeah, on your second.
[06:40] atsu
    No, I'll eat in the cafeteria today.
[06:42] atsu
    I just came to pick up something I forgot.
[06:44] atsu
    Later.
[06:46] yumoto
    Hey, is it true you had a
    fight with En-chan-senpai?
[06:50] both
    Right to the point?!
[06:52] atsu
    I don't know about a fight.
    I think he's just sulking.
[06:58] yumoto
    Then you should go offer to
    make up with him, Atsushi-senpai!
[07:04] atsu
    I'd better pass for now.
[07:07] atsu
    Sometimes it's best to let sleeping dogs lie.
[07:12] en
    Are you really okay with that?!
[07:15] atsu
    En-cha—
[07:15] en
    You should care more about me!
    Be more persistent!
[07:18] atsu
    That's totally different
    from what you said before!
[07:19] en
    You're really cold for someone
    whose name means "warm," you know.
[07:22] atsu
    Don't bring my name into this!
    I'm really worried about you!
[07:24] ryuu
    Hey, hey...
[07:24] atsu
    Am I suffocating you, or do you
    want me to care more? Which is it?
[07:26] en
    Both! Humans are contradictory, after all!
[07:30] atsu
    That's a pain in the ass!
[07:31] en
    Yeah, that's right!
[07:32] yumoto
    Hey, c'mon, cut it out!
[07:34] atsu
    Don't worry, Yumoto.
    It's between me and En-chan.
[07:38] en
    That's just it.
[07:39] en
    Why can't you be that
    thoughtful with me, I wonder?
[07:42] atsu
    I'm trying to be nice to you, too.
[07:45] en
    Is that so?
[07:46] en
    I know the excitement you show in
    the emails you send to me and Yumoto
[07:51] en
    are on totally different levels!
[07:56] en
    Your replies to me are always
    less than five words long!
[07:58] atsu
    Unlike yours, Yumoto's emails
[08:00] atsu
    aren't just bare-bones random
    sentences with no punctuation!
[08:03] atsu
    Plus, they come attached
    with excited emoticons!
[08:05] atsu
    Don't you think I should
    respond to that in kind?
[08:08] atsu
    By the way, have you been
    stealing my phone to look at it?!
[08:08] en
    The presence or absence of
    emoticons shows your favoritism!
[08:11] en
    Send me emails with emoticons sometimes!
[08:13] atsu
    Then send me emails of
    a decent length sometimes!
[08:16] atsu
    So have you been looking
    at my phone or not? Well?
[08:16] io
    I guess this is a fight, but...
[08:18] en
    What if I have?!
[08:19] ryuu
    It's the type it doesn't
    pay to interfere with, right?
[08:19] atsu
    I'd say you're a jerk!
[08:20] en
    Then say it! Show your
    contempt for how pathetic I am!
[08:22] atsu
    So you admit it, you jerk!
[08:24] yumoto
    U-Um, you guys...
[08:27] yumoto
    Why not leave it at that and have lunch?
[08:29] both
    No, thanks.
SIGN    Binan High School
[08:55] yumoto
    I've got to get them to make up somehow.
[08:58] ryuu
    Three girls a day... No, day and night...
[09:01] io
    To cut my losses or not?
[09:03] wom
    I have it! Here!
[09:07] io
    Stop making noise.
[09:08] ryuu
    You're not cut out for that.
[09:09] yumoto
    Come on, everyone, think seriously!
[09:12] ryuu
    There are things you think seriously about?
[09:14] io
    Those two will probably be fine,
    even if we don't worry about it.
[09:18] yumoto
    They won't be fine at all!
[09:20] yumoto
    They said they didn't even want lunch!
[09:22] yumoto
    You can't say you don't want food!
[09:24] yumoto
    It's a serious affair!
[09:25] ryuu
    Yeah, Yumoto never changes.
[09:28] yumoto
    I keep thinking, but it
    just makes my head hurt!
[09:31] yumoto
    I'm gonna go!
[09:32] wom
    Where?
[09:33] yumoto
    To see them!
[09:37] io
    Such determination...
    Maybe we should learn from him.
SIGN    Kusatsu Kinshiro
    Born September 12th
    Blood Type A / Virgo
    Hobbies: Archery
    Likes: Sanjusangendo Temple,
    Kintsuba, Amanatto
[09:48] kusa
    What?
[09:49] kusa
    Kinugawa and that guy?
[09:51] ari
    It seems so.
[09:52] gero
    Currently, Kinugawa is walking
    to and from school by himself.
[09:56] ari
    Yufuin comes to school,
    but he barely attends class,
[10:00] ari
    and I'm told that even when they
    cross paths, they don't speak.
[10:04] kusa
    I see.
[10:09] gero
    Th-That's good, is it?
[10:12] ari
    However,
[10:14] ari
    the first year boy, Hakone Yumoto-kun,
[10:17] ari
    is attempting to get them to reconcile.
[10:20] gero
    I really dislike that little fluff-head.
[10:22] gero
    He appears to lack any delicacy.
[10:25] zun
    It seems the effects of the monster we
    controlled are finally showing themselves.
[10:31] zun
    This time, by placing the monster in an
    establishment that humans use frequently,
[10:36] zun
    we can distribute the negative
    energy with greater efficiency.
[10:40] ari
    And the stronger the friendship,
    the greater the effect.
[10:44] gero
    Fight-causing radio waves.
[10:46] zun
    If we continue to destroy the bonds
    between those who are close...
[10:51] kusa
    Then we shall acquire the
    wonderful world we've always wanted!
[10:55] ari
    It's catching. The speech pattern is catching.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[11:00] yumoto
    How am I going to get them to make up?
[11:03] ryuu
    If you're too persistent, won't it
    just make the problem worse?
[11:08] io
    Just telling them to make up
    over and over lacks subtlety.
[11:11] yumoto
    It's not just that!
[11:13] yumoto
    I also asked what we're going to do
    about the Battle Lovers and stuff.
[11:16] wom
    Wh-What?
[11:18] en
    I quit. It's a pain in the ass.
[11:20] en
    Actually, it's always been a pain in the ass.
[11:22] atsu
    I'll help out if you really need me,
[11:24] atsu
    but I might not feel like
    transforming for a while.
[11:28] yumoto
    ...they said.
[11:29] wom
    I've had enough!
[11:31] wom
    Is it always going to be one step forward
    and one step back with you people?!
[11:34] ryuu
    It's because you forced us to transform
    without giving us time to object.
[11:37] wom
    But to begin with,
    I've been smelling it for a while.
[11:40] wom
    The scent of some kind of
    advanced scientific technology plot!
[11:44] yumoto
    You're saying a monster is behind this?
[11:45] wom
    Bingo!
[11:47] io
    But we haven't received one
    of those unpleasant alarms.
[11:50] wom
    It could be too weak to detect,
    or it could be a momentary power.
[11:54] ryuu
    A stealth monster, huh?
[11:56] yumoto
    Okay!
[11:57] yumoto
    In that case, I'll go over the
    school with a fine-toothed comb!
[12:01] ryuu
    Why are you so determined
    to do that kind of legwork?
[12:04] io
    Running around randomly won't do any good.
[12:06] yumoto
    But if we beat the monster, they'll make up!
[12:09] yumoto
    I can't just stand around!
[12:10] io
    If we consider people who might have
    been affected by this, I do have a lead.
[12:15] ryuu
    Kikuchi and Akutagawa from class A, right?
[12:16] io
    So you noticed?
[12:18] ryuu
    They've been arguing since that day, too, right?
[12:20] yumoto
    Where are you going?
[12:22] io
    To search for a monster.
[12:24] ryuu
    Using our heads.
[12:29] aku
    He's the one who decided to go shopping,
[12:31] aku
    but once he got back
    from the convenience store,
[12:33] aku
    he got all angry, like, "what am I, your gofer?"
[12:36] guy
    I was reading Chanporon
    at the convenience store,
[12:39] guy
    when he looked over at me and laughed.
[12:41] guy
    And it occurred to me maybe
    he was actually a Makachin fan,
[12:43] guy
    and suddenly I couldn't stand it...
[12:45] triplets
    Our friend went to the convenience store and...
[12:48] guy
    I was at the convenience store when...
[12:50] guy
    It was at the convenience store.
[12:52] ryuu
    The enemy's a convenience store?
[12:53] io
    It... seems so.
[12:55] yumoto
    I'm gonna go check!
[12:57] yumoto
    Atsushi-senpai! Atsushi-senpai!
[12:59] yumoto
    Atsushi-sen-pai-sen!
[13:01] atsu
    Paisen?
[13:03] yumoto
    Did you go to the convenience store near
    the school before your fight started?
[13:07] atsu
    How did you know that?
[13:08] yumoto
    You did?!
[13:10] atsu
    En-chan went in to buy some bread.
[13:13] yumoto
    That must be it!
[13:14] yumoto
    The culprit is in the convenience store!
[13:16] yumoto
    Spontaneous Love Making!
[13:42] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[13:43] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[13:46] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[13:49] yumoto
    Oh, wait, it's just me!
[13:52] yumoto
    Atsushi-senpai, I...
[13:54] yumoto
    I swear I'll get you two to make up!
[14:01] atsu
    It was a monster, then?
[14:07] yumoto
    Pardon me!
[14:09] owner
    Welcome—
[14:10] owner
    Cosplay?
[14:11] yumoto
    Is there a monster here?
[14:13] owner
    A... monster?
[14:14] owner
    No, I'm afraid we don't carry those here.
[14:17] yumoto
    That's weird. This has to be the place.
[14:24] owner
    Oh, that's my son.
[14:26] owner
    He's taking time off from school...
[14:29] yumoto
    I've got it!
[14:30] yumoto
    Above the convenience store!
[14:35] yumoto
    This is it! Pardon me!
[14:41] yumoto
    What a big kotatsu...
[14:46] monster
    Who are you?
[14:49] yumoto
    Come out of there! I'm gonna love you!
[14:51] monster
    No!
[14:53] yumoto
    It's not good for you to stay locked up all day!
[14:55] monster
    No!
[14:57] yumoto
    Damn. In this case...
[15:03] yumoto
    Love Stick!
[15:07] yumoto
    Scarlet Lumiere!
[15:12] ryuu
    Huh? Where's Yumoto?
[15:13] atsu
    Is there a monster?
[15:14] io
    No...
[15:22] yumoto
    Did I go a little overboard?
[15:32] en
    What's that?
[15:37] en
    They're...
[15:43] monster
    Ow, ow...
[15:45] monster
    Th-The school...
[15:49] yumoto
    What?
[15:50] monster
    School...
[15:52] monster
    No!
[15:55] monster
    I hate school!
[15:57] ryuu
    Look out!
[16:04] yumoto
    This guy's stronger than he looks!
[16:05] ryuu
    And he keeps getting bigger!
[16:07] io
    He's the type that gets harder to
    control as he gets angry, I guess.
[16:11] atsu
    Give back En-chan!
[16:15] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[16:21] monster
    What?
[16:23] atsu
    Give back my can't-be-bothered, listless En-chan!
[16:37] yumoto
    Epinard!
[16:50] io
    What?
[16:51] yumoto
    Cerulean-senpai!
[16:54] atsu
    Cerulean...
[16:55] en
    You need to eat more! You're too light!
[16:57] atsu
    Huh?!
[16:59] yumoto
    Yay! He's back to normal
    even though we haven't beaten it!
[17:02] en
    I'm not back!
[17:04] en
    I'm not back...
[17:06] en
    Even now, I'm really pissed off.
[17:09] yumoto
    Then why...?
[17:11] en
    I might be pissed off...
    But even more than that...
[17:14] en
    I'm furious at myself for nearly losing
    my best friend to such a stupid fight!
[17:29] monster
    D-Don't say "best friend"...
[17:32] monster
    It's embarrassing!
[17:38] atsu
    Cerulean!
[17:40] monster
    Nyah nyah!
[17:41] en
    What's embarrassing?
[17:44] en
    Yourself, because you can't
    call a best friend a best friend?
[17:50] monster
    You piss me off!
[17:56] en
    You idiot!
[18:00] en
    Hey!
[18:02] atsu
    I get it.
[18:03] atsu
    This does make me want to pick a fight.
[18:07] en
    Atsushi...
[18:09] atsu
    But...
[18:11] atsu
    Not right now!
[18:16] en
    That's right!
[18:41] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[18:43] en
    Cerulean Aqua!
[18:50] monster
    Why? Why didn't my radio waves work on you?
[18:54] en
    Hey! Use the Love Attack!
[18:56] yumoto
    Huh? Oh, roger that!
[18:59] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[19:02] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[19:04] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[19:07] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[19:09] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[19:14] yumoto
    This time, you two can
    deal out the finishing move!
[19:17] en
    Okay, let's do it!
[19:24] both
    Love Attack!
[19:38] monster
    So... So cold...
[19:40] monster
    My blanket...
[19:43] en
    The cold you feel is something
    no blanket can stave off.
[19:47] atsu
    You understand that too, don't you?
[19:51] both
    Love Shower!
[20:00] monster
    What is this sensation?
[20:04] monster
    Comfort... Healing...
[20:06] monster
    I see... so this is... love.
[20:12] both
    Love is over.
[20:15] both
    Huh?
[20:16] ryuu
    Isn't that the transfer student, Komi?
[20:19] yumoto
    You know him?
[20:20] ryuu
    Yeah.
[20:21] ryuu
    He transferred here at the end of the first term.
[20:24] io
    At the beginning of the second term,
    he was out of school with the flu...
[20:26] ryuu
    And he just stopped coming after that.
[20:29] io
    His house is above a
    convenience store, right?
[20:31] en
    Hey.
[20:35] en
    I'm really sorry!
[20:37] en
    I'm really, really sorry!
[20:39] en
    I know I wasn't myself,
    but I was totally messed up!
[20:41] atsu
    No, no, I'm the one who should apologize.
[20:43] atsu
    I didn't even notice a monster was behind it.
[20:45] en
    No, no, it's still my fault.
[20:47] atsu
    No, no, I'm at fault, too.
[20:49] en
    No, no, no, I'm triple at fault.
[20:51] atsu
    No, no, I'm at fault cubed.
[20:51] yumoto
    I feel like everything I did was wasted effort.
[20:53] en
    No, no, no, no...
[20:54] yumoto
    Oh well! It worked out okay!
[20:57] ryuu
    Not a care in the world, huh?
[20:58] io
    Maybe we should learn from him.
[21:00] en
    Hey, don't cling to me.
[21:02] atsu
    You're heavy!
SIGN    Kurotama Bath
[21:10] yumoto
    That's right, I've been
    completely forgetting my cuddles!
[21:13] yumoto
    I'm sorry!
[21:15] wom
    I wish you'd forgotten them forever!
[21:17] ryuu
    Komi said his house was so old,
    it was due for a remodeling anyway.
[21:21] io
    That's very convenient...
    I mean, quite a silver lining.
[21:25] ryuu
    Once his house is cleaned up,
    he says he'll have some friends over.
[21:28] io
    That's nice.
[21:30] io
    Even so...
[21:32] en
    No, no. It's my fault
    for erasing your save data.
[21:35] atsu
    No, no. It's my fault for getting
    to level 100 on a game you owned.
[21:38] en
    No, no. It's my fault for getting
    potato chips all over your bed.
[21:41] atsu
    No, no. It's my fault for secretly
    swapping my seat with yours in class
[21:44] atsu
    just because mine was wobbly.
[21:45] en
    What, seriously?
[21:46] en
    No, no. It's my fault for secretly
    looking at your cell phone.
[21:47] both
    How long will they keep that up
    before they're satisfied?
[21:48] atsu
    Actually, yeah.
[21:49] en
    Fine, I won't do it anymore.
[21:51] wom
    I'm done for!
[21:56] atsu
    En-chan, you're incredible.
[21:58] en
    How so?
[21:59] atsu
    You did something I could never do,
    and totally offhanded. It's amazing.
[22:02] en
    What's with you? What is it you want?
[22:05] en
    Fruit milk?
[22:06] atsu
    No, I already got some.
[23:41] ari
    You know, people don't look at
    you as much as you think they do.
[23:44] ari
    Not that it matters to me at all.
[23:46] ari
    Hey, let's eat some melon.
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is Stronger than Pride
[23:48] ari
    Next time: Love is Stronger than Pride.
[23:51] ari
    Conquest!

9 - Love is Stronger than Pride

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Student Council Room
[00:09] kusa
    Arima. Be quiet.
[00:11] ari
    Oh, sorry. Shall I make some tea?
[00:14] kusa
    If I want some, I'll tell you.
[00:15] gero
    Is it because second term's starting?
[00:18] gero
    Is it because of them?
[00:20] gero
    Is that why you're feeling grumpy, President?
[00:23] kusa
    You're calling me grumpy?
[00:25] kusa
    Have I done something to
    annoy you, Gero Akoya-kun?
[00:31] gero
    You only use my last name like that
    when you're feeling grumpy, President.
[00:36] kusa
    I'm afraid you're wrong about that, Gero-kun.
[00:39] ari
    Oh, I know!
[00:41] ari
    I'll bring out the dacquoise
    I've been holding on to.
[00:44] kusa
    No.
[00:44] gero
    No thank you.
[00:45] ari
    But at times like this...
[00:47] kusa
    What do you mean...
[00:48] gero
    ..."times like this"?
[00:49] ari
    Oh... Well...
[00:51] both
    What is it?
[00:52] zun
    I have had enough of this!
[00:55] zun
    Members of the Caerula Adamas.
[00:57] zun
    Our Total Conquest of Earth's Lifeforms
    Project has reached a serious problem.
[01:02] zun
    We still have not identified the enemy,
[01:04] zun
    and they block every one of our plans.
[01:07] kusa
    Our most recent plan, as well...
[01:10] kusa
    It means our present strategy is not effective.
[01:14] zun
    Aurite is correct.
[01:16] zun
    I cannot afford to waste any more of
    my precious Zundar Needles like this.
[01:20] zun
    We must fundamentally rethink our strategy.
[01:23] ari
    Precious?
[01:24] gero
    Fundamentally?
[01:25] zun
    That's right!
[01:27] zun
    Instead of waiting for them to appear,
    we shall go on the offensive!
[01:30] kusa
    Go on the offensive?
[01:33] zun
    A new development awaits us!
SIGN    Love is Stronger than Pride
[03:15] guy
    It happened before, too.
    He does such weird things by himself.
[03:19] guy
    He really can't read the mood.
[03:22] guy
    Or maybe it's that he doesn't read the mood?
[03:24] ---
    Yeah, could be...
[03:26] uri
    What are they talking about?
[03:28] uri
    No, who are they talking about?
SIGN    Makuwa Uriya
[03:31] uri
    What kind of person must one be
[03:33] uri
    to come up in their conversation?
[03:35] uri
    The bold type that doesn't read
    the mood, but pretends he just can't?
[03:38] uri
    The self-centered type that can't read
    the mood, but pretends he just doesn't?
[03:42] uri
    A hybrid between them?
[03:44] uri
    I only know one person like that.
[03:48] uri
    Someone who, despite caring what others think,
[03:50] uri
    views showing that interest as a sign of failure.
[03:53] uri
    Yes.
[03:54] uri
    That is...
[03:56] guy
    Should we go?
[03:57] guy
    Let's go.
[04:00] uri
    I know. I really do know.
[04:03] uri
    I'm excessively self-conscious.
[04:06] uri
    No one really cares what I do.
[04:08] uri
    No, I'm the one who's
    weird for caring about that.
[04:10] uri
    Actually, it's caring about it that
    makes me excessively self-conscious.
[04:13] uri
    I feel like my mind's racing in circles.
[04:15] uri
    Do I want to care or not?
[04:17] uri
    Do I want to act like I care or not?
[04:19] uri
    And should* I care or not?
[04:21] aur
    Makuwa Uriya.
[04:23] arg
    Monster of ego.
[04:24] per
    You'll make an appropriate
    servant to the Caerula Adamas.
[04:29] uri
    What's going on? Is this a delusion?
[04:32] uri
    Or a prank?
[04:34] uri
    No, it must be a delusion.
[04:35] uri
    After all, I'm not exactly famous
    enough to be the subject of a prank.
[04:39] uri
    But what if, by chance, someone films
    this and the video is put on the internet,
[04:40] kusa
    Aurum!
[04:41] ari
    Argentum!
[04:43] gero
    Perla!
[04:43] uri
    and this becomes my world debut,
    and I become surprisingly popular?
[04:47] trio
    Donum!
[04:50] uri
    That's right!
[04:51] uri
    I'm not some ordinary gourd (uri),
    but a special melon!
[04:54] uri
    Yes, a muskmelon!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[05:06] ryuu
    Hey!
[05:07] ryuu
    So who came up with the name
    "Earth Defense Club," anyway?
[05:10] atsu
    Who knows? It's been called that
    since I started coming here.
[05:14] ryuu
    Well, not like it matters.
[05:16] en
    If it doesn't matter, don't ask.
[05:17] ryuu
    Yufuin-senpai, is that manga interesting?
[05:21] en
    Occasionally.
[05:22] ryuu
    Which means it's usually boring, then?
[05:25] io
    Sounds like your relationships with girls.
[05:28] ryuu
    Occasionally interesting.
[05:30] ryuu
    The memories are priceless.
[05:32] io
    Don't make me laugh.
[05:34] en
    I'm impressed you two can hang out.
[05:37] ryuu
    You're saying that, Yufuin-senpai?
[05:39] en
    What does that mean?
[05:41] atsu
    You mean me and En-chan?
[05:43] en
    Speaking of which, why
    do you hang out with me?
[05:47] atsu
    You're asking that?
[05:49] ---
    Yeah.
[05:50] atsu
    Why...? It just went that way, I guess?
[05:53] en
    Wow. That's mean.
[05:54] atsu
    You asking me why was pretty mean, too.
[05:57] en
    Well, to me, Atsushi, you're basically air.
[06:01] atsu
    Is that a compliment?
[06:02] en
    It's a huge compliment.
[06:04] atsu
    Is it?
[06:09] yumoto
    Yo!
[06:10] en
    Why are you coming in from there?
[06:12] yumoto
    And down!
[06:14] yumoto
    I think a change of mood is a good thing sometimes.
[06:16] atsu
    What do you mean, change of mood?
[06:18] atsu
    I'd really like to hear about this.
[06:20] yumoto
    Just kidding. It's a joke.
[06:22] yumoto
    It's because Wombat ran away!
[06:24] en
    He should just give up and
    surrender himself to you already.
[06:27] yumoto
    That's right!
[06:29] ryuu
    What do you even like about that bristly thing?
[06:31] io
    He stinks, too.
[06:33] wom
    I am not bristly, nor do I stink!
[06:37] yumoto
    Oh, now look! Wom-san is pouting! Poor thing!
[06:42] yumoto
    Well, I'm still on your side, okay?
[06:45] en
    But if Yumoto was chasing you,
    why did you show up after he did?
[06:50] atsu
    And where's Mr. Tawarayama?
[06:53] atsu
    Did you leave him again?
[06:54] wom
    He's right here!
[06:56] en
    Hey, rigor mortis is setting in!
[06:58] atsu
    Who hung that bag on him?
[07:00] yumoto
    Oh, that's mine!
[07:02] en
    I wish you'd share a hundredth of the concern
    you have for Wombat with Mr. Tawarayama.
[07:10] wom
    It's the Love Alert!
[07:13] en
    I'm sick of arguing about
    whether we should go or not.
[07:15] en
    Might as well just go.
[07:17] atsu
    Let's zip over there and zip right back.
[07:19] wom
    Stop treating this like a rush job!
[07:27] en
    There he is!
[07:29] melon
    I've been waiting, Battle Lovers!
[07:33] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[07:36] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[07:38] io
    Love is all!
[07:40] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[07:43] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[07:45] five
    Battle Lovers!
[07:48] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[07:50] five
    Of love!
[07:52] yumoto
    Now, let's go right to the Love Attack!
[07:55] melon
    Why don't we have a little talk?
[07:57] yumoto
    A talk? About the jealousy, envy,
    and inferiority you feel towards us?
[08:02] melon
    Yes, that might make a good theme.
[08:05] melon
    Jealousy, pity, and envy are three of a kind,
    cooking poison in the same pot.
[08:10] en
    What? Is today's monster a wannabe scholar?
[08:14] en
    Epinard, I leave this sort of
    self-sufficient type to you.
[08:18] atsu
    Huh? Why?
[08:19] en
    It seems like your strong point.
[08:21] yumoto
    I'll beat him down with my
    unique communication skills!
[08:26] atsu
    You can't call it communication
    if you're trying to beat him down.
[08:29] atsu
    First, we have to be quiet and hear his side.
[08:31] yumoto
    Huh? Grumble grumble.
[08:33] atsu
    Don't say "grumble grumble."
[08:35] en
    So what do you have to say?
[08:39] melon
    The "Andes" in "Andes melon" doesn't
    refer to the Andes Mountains.
SIGN    Scroll of Riddles
[08:44] melon
    Did you know that?
[08:47] melon
    The "Andes" in "Andes Melon" doesn't
    refer to the Andes Mountains.
[08:50] melon
    The truth is...
[08:51] yumoto
    Yeah? Yeah?
[08:53] melon
    The "Prince" in "Prince melon"
    doesn't refer to royalty.
[08:56] melon
    The truth is...
[08:57] yumoto
    Yeah? Yeah?
[08:58] melon
    Melons are not really fruit. The truth is...
[09:02] yumoto
    Yeah? Yeah?
[09:04] melon
    Are you interested?
[09:06] melon
    If you want to know the truth, you'll
    have to come to Mt. Binan on Sunday.
[09:12] melon
    We shall meet again, friends of my soul!
[09:15] yumoto
    What, you're not gonna tell us now?
[09:17] yumoto
    No fair!
[09:20] ryuu
    The "Andes" in "Andes melon"
[09:23] ryuu
    comes from "anshin desu" (don't worry)
    with the core (shin) removed.
[09:26] ryuu
    A play on the fact that it's a melon with seeds.
[09:28] ---
    Wow!
[09:29] ryuu
    The "Prince" in "Prince melon"
[09:31] ryuu
    is named after the group that
    developed the seeds in a lab.
[09:34] ---
    Wow!
[09:36] ryuu
    "Fruit," according to the Ministry
    of Agriculture and Forestry,
[09:39] ryuu
    is something that grows into a tree,
[09:40] ryuu
    whereas melons are herbaceous,
    growing at the soil level,
[09:43] ryuu
    which makes them fruit-like vegetables.
[09:45] ---
    Wow!
[09:47] ryuu
    By the way, the "musk" in "muskmelon"
[09:49] ryuu
    doesn't come from the fact
    that it appears to have a mask,
[09:50] en
    You can look up anything on
    the internet nowadays, huh?
[09:53] ryuu
    but because it produces a
    strong aroma known as "musk."
[09:54] atsu
    And that monster seemed so confident
    as it threw those riddles at us.
[09:56] ---
    Wow! Wow!
[09:58] ryuu
    One other thing: the mesh pattern
    of a muskmelon is scars!
[10:02] ryuu
    It's because of fractures that occur in
    the rind as the fruit within is growing.
[10:06] yumoto
    Wow!
[10:08] en
    I wish the monster could have seen that "Wow!"
[10:12] atsu
    He probably would've been
    pretty pleased with himself.
[10:14] io
    He probably thought he could lure
    out someone like Yumoto that way.
[10:19] yumoto
    Lure me out? What do you mean, Io-senpai?
[10:22] io
    Yumoto, you really are carefree.
[10:26] io
    Listen to me. The enemy's plan is...
[10:29] zun
    To set a trap for them and strike!
[10:31] zun
    That is our plan this time!
[10:33] kusa
    We've been one step
    behind them all this time.
[10:36] zun
    This time, we shall annihilate the enemy.
[10:39] zun
    It's a truly delicious idea.
[10:43] ari
    By the way, Lord Zundar.
[10:45] ari
    Is that thing you're eating right now a sn—
[10:48] kusa
    Is that escargot?
[10:50] ari
    No, it's a snail!
[10:55] zun
    The foods of Earth are delicious.
[10:58] zun
    This time, at last, our victory is assured!
[11:02] wom
    An ambush?!
[11:04] wom
    What a lovelessly dirty trick!
[11:07] ryuu
    Regardless of the ambush,
    just getting there would be a pain.
[11:11] yumoto
    You mean you guys aren't planning to go?
[11:15] ryuu
    You're saying you are planning to go?
[11:16] yumoto
    Well, he did say, "We shall meet again!"
    We solved his melon riddles, but still...
[11:21] ryuu
    How far are you willing
    to go to humor someone?
[11:23] en
    It's not like we told him we'd go, so we're safe.
[11:26] io
    That's right.
[11:28] ---
    What?
[11:28] wom
    Wait a minute!
[11:30] wom
    The heirs to the throne of love,
    the Battle Lovers, can't simply—
[11:33] en
    But it'll be tiring, and baths cost money.
[11:36] atsu
    You can't spend money you don't have.
[11:40] io
    Why are you looking at me?
[11:42] en
    I think Wombat's trying to
    ask you to pay our way there.
[11:46] io
    Now, look...
[11:47] ryuu
    If you try to borrow money from Io,
    your friendship with him is over.
[11:51] wom
    In this situation, I suppose that cannot be helped.
[11:54] wom
    In the name of love—
[11:55] io
    Are you saying friendship isn't love?!
[11:59] kino
    In that case, I know a very good way!
SIGN    Arima Ibushi
    Born November 10th
    Blood Type AB / Scorpio
    Hobbies: Backgammon
    Likes: Gardening,
    carbonated rice crackers
[12:10] ryuu
    Ugh, it's you! Where did you come from?
[12:13] kino
    How rude of me!
[12:14] kino
    I overheard your conversation.
[12:17] en
    Overheard...?
[12:19] kino
    If you're having money troubles,
[12:21] kino
    our Press Society feels it is of
    pressing urgency to come to your aid!
[12:27] atsu
    Press Society...
[12:28] ryuu
    ...and pressing urgency?
[12:30] en
    Was that a joke?
[12:31] kino
    We have a very good idea.
[12:33] kino
    A surefire way to make a fortune in no time!
[12:36] yumoto
    What is it?
[12:37] kino
    Do you remember?
[12:39] kino
    Our Press Society published your Earth
    Defense Club activities on the internet.
[12:44] atsu
    Well, yeah...
[12:46] en
    That's right, that did happen.
[12:48] kino
    That article was a big hit!
SIGN    Yumoto-kun's cuuuuuute!
SIGN    Yes, he's an angel!
SIGN    En is way too hot
SIGN    Atsushiiiiiiiiii
[12:51] kino
    Right now, you all are internet idols!
SIGN    Io-kun Io-kun Io-kun Io-kun
SIGN    Yumoto-kun Yumoto-kun Yumoto-kun
SIGN    I love glasses!
[12:54] all
    Huh?!
[12:56] atsu
    Internet idols?
[12:57] atsu
    Isn't that term a little vague?
[13:01] en
    I know the words "internet" and "idols,"
[13:03] en
    but when you put them together,
    suddenly it all feels very indeterminate.
[13:07] kino
    Don't think about it too hard!
[13:09] kino
    The point is, you're popular!
[13:13] kino
    I've received a lot of requests for more
    coverage of that five-man hottie group!
[13:19] yumoto
    You want us to do something
    to Mr. Tawarayama again?
[13:22] kino
    No, no, no! I'm speaking more of gravure.
[13:27] all
    Gravure?!
[13:28] kino
    If you agree to be my models...
[13:33] kino
    I could probably pay you this much.
[13:36] atsu
    No way!
[13:37] io
    That's not possible!
    Are you trying to scam us?
[13:40] kino
    Do not underestimate your own popularity!
[13:43] kino
    If you sell well, I might be
    able to pay you even more!
[13:46] yumoto
    Wow!
[13:48] kino
    Then, first, take these.
[13:54] taz
    Good! Good! Yumocchan, you're amazing!
[13:58] yumoto
    Oh, am I?
[13:59] taz
    Magnum!
[14:01] taz
    Great shot!
[14:02] taz
    Perfect!
[14:03] en
    Was the Press Society photographer
    always that kind of character?
[14:06] taz
    A little bit of blur...
[14:08] kino
    And now, the rest of you!
[14:18] taz
    Good! Nice! Yes, straighter!
[14:20] taz
    Right! Good!
[14:21] en
    Wait! This is all just cosplay!
[14:25] kino
    It's part of a plan to put pictures of the
    Earth Defense Club wearing various costumes
[14:29] kino
    in calendars and sell them like hotcakes!
[14:32] en
    Who would buy something like that?
[14:34] atsu
    You know, it's like those calendars with
    burly firemen and athletes in various poses.
[14:39] ryuu
    I've heard of those.
[14:40] io
    I feel vaguely like I've sold my soul.
[14:44] kino
    Money talks, even in hell.
[14:47] kino
    Well, would you like your receipt?
[14:50] kino
    As thanks for the photos.
[15:01] yumoto
    Those Press Society guys are really great!
[15:03] yumoto
    These rice balls are delicious!
[15:05] yumoto
    Thanks, big bro!
[15:07] yumoto
    Cards! I wanna play Old Maid!
[15:09] yumoto
    Then we'll play shiritori!
[15:11] yumoto
    And the Yamanote Line game!
[15:12] yumoto
    Oh, there's not enough time!
[15:14] en
    He's sure excited.
[15:16] ryuu
    Damn, persistent caller.
[15:18] io
    Did something happen?
[15:24] yumoto
    The air is so fresh!
[15:26] en
    We finally made it.
SIGN    Binan Mountain Station
[15:30] ryuu
    She doesn't believe I'm really
    away on club business.
[15:32] io
    That's only natural.
[15:34] ryuu
    That's so cold! Take a selfie with me, okay?
[15:37] io
    Sure, but won't she think it's
    just a badly shopped photo?
[15:44] ryuu
    Girls are cute, but they're
    really annoying at times.
[15:48] en
    Really? At times?
[15:50] ryuu
    Well, I think of the annoyance
    as part of their cuteness.
[15:53] en
    Amazing.
[15:54] en
    Anyway, so we have to climb this?
[16:01] atsu
    If someone says to meet on Mt. Binan,
    they'd normally mean the summit, right?
[16:07] en
    Can we transform?
[16:08] wom
    Oh? Have you finally recognized
    yourselves as the Battle Lovers?
[16:12] en
    No, but our physical skills increase
    when we transform, right?
[16:15] en
    I thought it'd make it a little easier.
[16:18] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[16:21] five
    Battle Lovers!
[16:23] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[16:25] five
    Of love!
[16:31] en
    Or so I thought, but I guess not.
[16:34] atsu
    En-chan, you never exercise effort,
    spirit, or endurance, do you?
[16:38] en
    Yeah. I'd rather be a lifetime idler.
[16:42] en
    That was close! What is this thing?
[16:44] atsu
    A sinkhole, maybe?
[16:47] en
    Now I'm even more tired.
[16:52] en
    By the way, Atsushi, what do
    you want to do in the future?
[16:55] atsu
    Me? I'm not sure.
[16:58] atsu
    Go to college and get a job
    like most people, I guess?
[17:01] atsu
    Io, are you going to the Cayman Islands?
[17:02] io
    There's no retiring from
    investment and management, after all.
[17:05] ryuu
    Well, I'm gonna become Hugh Hefner!
[17:07] io
    I don't know about that.
[17:09] yumoto
    I'm gonna become the world's
    #1 bath-firewood man!
[17:12] en
    Isn't your family's pubilc bath a natural hot spring?
[17:15] yumoto
    That's true, but "bath-washer man"
    doesn't have as nice a ring to it.
[17:19] ryuu
    What is all this, anyway?
[17:24] yumoto
    Hey!
[17:25] yumoto
    Hey, Melon Monster!
[17:29] yumoto
    We're here!
[17:32] melon
    Wh-What are you doing here?!
[17:34] yumoto
    You told us to come!
[17:36] melon
    Well, yes, but on the way up, I set all those...
[17:40] atsu
    Oh, you mean that survival action stuff?
[17:43] yumoto
    That was pretty fun! Thanks!
[17:46] ryuu
    No, I don't think he put
    those there for us to enjoy.
[17:49] yumoto
    Oh, really?
[17:53] melon
    You may be my enemy, but I am impressed!
[17:54] atsu
    Looks like he bounced back.
[17:57] melon
    You must be very interested in
    the melon riddles I threw at you.
[18:01] yumoto
    Yeah. Actually, we figured
    them all out using the internet.
[18:04] melon
    What?!
[18:05] yumoto
    "Anshin desu," the name of a group,
    and fruit-like vegetables.
[18:09] yumoto
    Also "musk" and scars.
[18:10] melon
    It can't be... No...
[18:12] melon
    You solved my melon riddles so easily?!
[18:15] yumoto
    Also, sorry...
[18:17] yumoto
    I'm the kind of person who doesn't really
    care if he gets melon after dinner or not.
[18:20] en
    Same here, actually.
[18:22] atsu
    It's just another gourd, anyway.
[18:24] ryuu
    I prefer cherries.
[18:26] ryuu
    Not American cherries, but Sato Nishiki.
[18:29] io
    Those are more expensive too, right?
[18:31] melon
    It can't be... You don't care about melons?
[18:36] melon
    It's melon, you know? That melon!
[18:38] yumoto
    Sorry.
[18:40] yumoto
    If you give me some, I will eat it, of course.
[18:42] melon
    What an apathetic reaction!
[18:44] melon
    You've shaken my entire raison d'etre!
[18:48] en
    He's suffering.
[18:50] atsu
    Really suffering.
[18:51] ryuu
    Why are you talking about
    "raison d'etre," anyway?
[18:55] melon
    J-Just kidding. I knew that, too.
[18:58] melon
    The melon is a relic of the past.
[19:01] melon
    I was just playing melon.
[19:03] melon
    Because they say melons are tops, you know?
[19:06] yumoto
    Playing melon? Melons are tops?
[19:08] melon
    In the same way bananas started
    to sell out in an instant,
[19:12] melon
    and the way people started to say that eggs
    are the honor student of foodstuffs,
[19:15] melon
    even thinking of melons as
    having value is a total anachronism.
[19:16] atsu
    Is this guy okay? He's getting
    into self-abuse now...
[19:20] melon
    I knew all that,
[19:21] melon
    but when you say that, it just makes
    people worry about you, you know?
[19:25] melon
    So the melon was just playing melon!
[19:28] en
    Who is he even talking to?
[19:30] ryuu
    Himself, I think?
[19:32] io
    He seems desperate to bounce back from this.
[19:34] melon
    I'm not special at all,
[19:36] melon
    but whether you're expecting
    me to be special or not,
[19:40] melon
    I'd still like to meet your expectations,
    or something like that.
[19:43] melon
    Have you ever met someone so willing to
    think things down two or three levels?
[19:48] melon
    Or something like that!
[19:49] yumoto
    What's he talking about?
[19:51] en
    In a word, he's excessively self-conscious?
[19:54] atsu
    That's likely.
[19:55] melon
    Likely?!
[20:00] yumoto
    I don't really understand, but don't sweat it.
[20:04] yumoto
    No worries!
[20:04] melon
    No worries?!
[20:06] yumoto
    That's right. We did come, after all.
[20:09] melon
    You took pity on me!
[20:11] yumoto
    This is a nice place. I'm glad we came.
[20:15] yumoto
    We owe you, Melon Monster.
[20:17] yumoto
    If not for you, I would never have
    given a second thought to melons.
[20:22] yumoto
    I'm glad.
[20:25] yumoto
    I like melon-flavored shaved ice and such.
[20:29] en
    And melon bread.
[20:30] atsu
    And melon soda, too.
[20:32] io
    The cheap stuff has its own appeal.
[20:34] ryuu
    And everything has its own flavor.
[20:49] melon
    So you don't mind a melon like me?
[20:52] yumoto
    Why would we mind?
[20:56] wom
    Everyone, now! Give him love!
[20:59] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[21:09] melon
    Ah, the synergistic effect
    of comfort and healing!
[21:12] melon
    100% fruit juice is soaking into my scars!
[21:15] melon
    I don't need to stay in a
    paulownia box any longer!
[21:21] yumoto
    Love is over!
[21:25] zun
    The presence has disappeared.
[21:27] zun
    So he's been loved, as well?
[21:29] gero
    A shame.
[21:31] kusa
    Forgive us, Lord Zundar.
[21:33] kusa
    It seems our selection was ill-considered.
[21:35] zun
    But it did have a bit of an effect.
[21:38] ari
    Effect?
[21:39] zun
    Let's be satisfied with what we did for today.
[21:44] zun
    After we take a brief rest,
    we'll consider our next development.
[21:49] zun
    With that, I bid thee farewell!
[21:55] kino
    It looks like the gravure was popular.
[21:58] kino
    I hope this will translate into numbers, as well.
[22:02] kino
    Right?
[23:40] gero
    Isn't it true that the more a person
    thinks of himself as "cute,"
[23:43] gero
    the blacker his heart must be?
[23:45] gero
    How do I know that's true?
[23:47] gero
    Well, it's true of me, after all!
[23:50] gero
    Next time: Love is Glasses...
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    Love is Glasses...
[23:53] gero
    Conquest!

10 - Love is Glasses...

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ryuu
    Hey, that looks good. The daily special?
[00:07] io
    Yes. When it comes to lunch,
[00:09] io
    the cafeteria's daily special
    is definitely the way to go.
[00:11] io
    It's completely satisfactory in
    terms of both value and flavor.
[00:16] atsu
    You've been getting bread a lot, En-chan.
[00:18] en
    Yeah. Everything else is just a pain.
[00:21] atsu
    You should have some vegetables, too.
[00:23] atsu
    Want some of this stew?
[00:29] atsu
    Yumoto, is something wrong?
[00:32] yumoto
    I don't seem to have any appetite.
[00:36] ---
    What?!
[00:39] wom
    It's unusual for you to have no appetite...
[00:43] yumoto
    And today's the day my brother
    Gora makes lunch for me, too...
[00:49] en
    I guess unusual things do happen.
[00:52] yumoto
    Huh? Now that I look closer, En-chan-senpai,
    you have really long eyelashes...
[00:58] en
    Atsushi, he's acting weird.
[01:00] atsu
    Yeah, weird.
[01:02] megawa
    Oh, look out!
[01:04] yumoto
    Megawacchi...
[01:06] megawa
    Huh? Yumoto-kun, your face is red.
[01:09] atsu
    Now that you mention it...
[01:10] ryuu
    Megawacchi?
SIGN    Megawa Rui
[01:12] megawa
    I'm Yumoto-kun's classmate, Megawa Rui.
[01:16] megawa
    I'm the manager of the baseball club.
[01:18] megawa
    Nice to meet you!
[01:21] ryuu
    R-Right...
[01:23] megawa
    Yumoto-kun, do you have a cold?
    They're going around lately.
[01:26] yumoto
    But I've never caught a cold in my life.
[01:30] megawa
    Why don't we check your temperature? Hang on.
[01:33] megawa
    Here, a thermometer.
[01:35] atsu
    He's a manager, all right.
[01:40] megawa
    37°C?
[01:41] yumoto
    Huh?
[01:42] yumoto
    Wow! I've never reached 37°C before!
[01:46] yumoto
    No wonder I feel so lightheaded!
[01:49] atsu
    You feel lightheaded?
[01:51] yumoto
    Yep. And it's throbbing, too.
[01:54] io
    It does sound like a cold, then.
[01:56] ryuu
    But I've never seen anyone
    so happy about geting a cold.
[02:02] en
    Atsushi, Yumoto really is acting weird.
[02:05] atsu
    Yeah, he is.
[02:06] megawa
    Yumoto-kun, why not leave early?
[02:08] megawa
    Maybe you should just get some rest today.
[02:11] yumoto
    Yay! Leave early! Hooray!
[02:14] club
    Hey, Megawa.
[02:16] megawa
    Yes?
[02:17] megawa
    Well, I'll be going now. Take care!
[02:21] yumoto
    Bye-bye, Megawacchi!
[02:23] ryuu
    He seems like the really pleasant type.
[02:26] io
    I bet he's really popular.
[02:28] yumoto
    Bye-bye!
[02:31] megawa
    That's right. I have a very good,
    pleasant disposition.
[02:34] megawa
    I'm the #1 glasses boy first-year student
    that everyone wants as their manager.
[02:38] megawa
    In terms of cuteness, I'm easily a
    match for any glasses-girl character.
SIGN    Love is Glasses...
[04:21] en
    It seems like Yumoto-kun has a cold,
    so we brought him home.
[04:25] goro
    What? Yumoto has a cold?
[04:27] ryuu
    That's right.
[04:29] io
    He has a fever of 37°C.
[04:31] gora
    A fever?!
[04:33] gora
    Heat up a bath! A bath!
[04:35] en
    It's heated. This is a public bath, y'know.
[04:37] gora
    Ice! Go to the snowy mountains to pick up ice!
[04:40] atsu
    Isn't there ice in the freezer?
[04:41] ryuu
    Where did "snowy mountains"
    come from, anyway?
[04:45] gora
    That's right, onions!
[04:47] gora
    For a cold, you need onions!
[04:48] gora
    Cooked onions!
[04:50] io
    I don't get it.
[04:52] ryuu
    Why onions?
[04:53] yumoto
    Big bro Gora always says
    onions are good for a fever.
[04:58] en
    Really?
[05:00] atsu
    Is that a folk remedy or something?
[05:05] gora
    How's that, Yumoto?
[05:07] yumoto
    Stinks of onions.
[05:10] gora
    That's just fine.
[05:12] yumoto
    I think I'm getting sleepy.
[05:14] gora
    Sleep.
[05:15] yumoto
    Okay.
[05:17] atsu
    Kind of a strange sight, isn't it?
[05:20] en
    I get what you mean.
[05:22] gora
    My little brother has never once caught a cold.
[05:27] gora
    He must be overexerting himself somehow.
[05:30] atsu
    Well, he may have been a
    little busy with club activities.
[05:34] gora
    That doesn't explain such a high fever.
[05:37] ryuu
    No, it's a mild fever.
[05:38] io
    I think it's just an ordinary cold, myself.
[05:40] gora
    A cold is a gateway to all kinds of illnesses.
[05:43] gora
    For this to happen on my watch...
[05:46] en
    It's okay, big brother. The fever's low.
[05:50] atsu
    But I really am worried.
    For Yumoto to be stuck in bed...
[05:53] io
    They say fools don't catch colds, after all.
[05:55] ryuu
    He said it out loud!
[05:58] gora
    Yumoto, your big brother will save you!
[06:06] atsu
    That was some pretty
    amazing brotherly love, huh?
[06:09] en
    I guess the Yumoto doesn't fall far from the tree.
[06:11] wom
    Such a moving sight!
[06:14] wom
    The reason Yumoto-san so
    passionately dedicates himself to love
[06:17] wom
    is because of the deep love from his
    brother that envelops him every day!
[06:21] wom
    Oh, how I wish I could scout that
    brother for the Earth Defense Club!
[06:26] ryuu
    You're that impressed?
[06:27] io
    That's some show of emotion.
[06:30] wom
    I'm absolutely welling over with emotion!
[06:32] wom
    Although I am concerned
    about Yumoto-san's fever...
[06:37] ryuu
    Yo!
[06:38] io
    Good morning.
[06:40] en
    Hey.
[06:41] atsu
    Morning.
[06:42] yumoto
    Good day to you.
[06:46] yumoto
    Senpai. Good day to you.
[06:49] en
    "Good day to you"?
[06:50] ryuu
    What's with the glasses?
[06:52] yumoto
    Everything near me suddenly appeared too close.
[06:55] atsu
    Wait, you are Yumoto, right?
[06:56] yumoto
    Yes. I am Hakone Yumoto.
[06:59] yumoto
    Lovely weather today, isn't it?
[07:01] io
    By the way, has your fever gone down?
[07:04] yumoto
    I still have a fever,
[07:06] yumoto
    but my brother Gora brewed
    some medicinal herbs for me.
[07:09] yumoto
    I felt so pleasantly refreshed, I decided to come.
[07:12] atsu
    But if you still have a fever,
    you should rest, shouldn't you?
[07:16] ryuu
    Your brother must've been worried, too.
[07:18] yumoto
    I didn't tell him I was leaving,
    so he doesn't know.
[07:21] yumoto
    On such a pleasant day,
    I simply couldn't stay in bed.
[07:24] yumoto
    Well, excuse me!
[07:28] atsu
    Am I the only one who's bothered by that?
[07:30] en
    No, I think we're all bothered by that.
[07:33] io
    Yeah. Yumoto's character has changed, hasn't it?
[07:35] ryuu
    Do you think the fever knocked a screw loose?
[07:37] goro
    Yumoto, I cooked some more onion.
[07:42] gora
    Yumoto?
[07:47] yumoto
    Ah, the gentlemen of the
    Student Council. Good day to you.
[07:54] yumoto
    Has your morning meeting finished?
[07:56] ari
    Yes.
[07:58] yumoto
    I'm glad to hear it. You do such fine work.
[08:00] yumoto
    Pardon me.
[08:03] ari
    That was that first-year boy
    from the Defense Club, wasn't it?
[08:05] gero
    Yes. He's always been a rather strange boy.
[08:08] kusa
    Don't be led astray by fools.
[08:10] kusa
    Every minute spent thinking
    about them is wasted.
[08:12] gero
    That's true.
[08:13] ari
    Harsh.
[08:18] yumoto
    Oh, Megawacchi. Good day to you.
[08:22] yumoto
    Are you working hard at your
    morning practice as always?
[08:24] megawa
    Yeah.
[08:25] megawa
    Yumoto-kun, are you feeling better now?
[08:28] yumoto
    Yes. Thank you for yesterday.
[08:30] yumoto
    Well, I'll be going to the classroom now.
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[08:55] atsu
    What brought this on all of a sudden?
[08:57] yumoto
    I've been concerned about
    the mess for some time.
[09:00] en
    You have?
[09:02] wom
    Magnificent, Yumoto-san!
[09:04] wom
    Cleaning is love that goes by the name "service"!
[09:07] yumoto
    Yes!
[09:09] ryuu
    What happened to him?
[09:11] io
    I don't know.
[09:13] en
    But his character has
    completely changed, hasn't it?
[09:16] atsu
    Yeah.
[09:17] atsu
    Actually, remember what his brother said?
[09:19] atsu
    "A cold is a gateway to all kinds of illnesses."
[09:21] io
    What about it?
[09:23] atsu
    You don't think Yumoto is
    going though that, do you?
[09:29] atsu
    The first fever he's had since he
    was born has overloaded his brain?!
[09:33] ryuu
    That's not possible. It was only 37°C.
[09:36] en
    But it might not be out of the question.
[09:38] io
    Yes. Maybe this is exactly what his
    brother was afraid would happen.
[09:42] yumoto
    Now...
[09:43] yumoto
    Teacher, I'll clean you up nicely, too.
[09:46] en
    What will we do if he stays like this?
[09:49] ryuu
    Scary.
[09:51] atsu
    But I wonder if he even can
    go back to the old Yumoto.
[09:54] io
    I don't know...
[09:56] wom
    I think things are better this way.
[09:59] wom
    When all is said and done,
    he's overflowing with love!
[10:04] en
    What happened?
[10:05] yumoto
    I was cleaning up, and the bookcase fell apart.
[10:08] atsu
    Oh, this was in pretty bad shape.
[10:11] io
    But Mr. Tawarayama's been...
[10:14] ryuu
    Teacher, hang in there!
[10:15] ryuu
    Wait, he's dead already...
[10:16] en
    Hey, look.
[10:19] en
    I didn't know there was a door here.
[10:26] gero
    Why are we remodeling all of a sudden?
[10:29] ari
    Just a bit of feng shui.
[10:32] gero
    I didn't know you were concerned
    with such things, Arima-san.
[10:34] ari
    I suppose I am.
[10:35] kusa
    But...
[10:38] kusa
    I didn't know there was a door here.
[10:42] yumoto
    Okay! It's all clean!
[10:47] yumoto
    Well, I'm going to go take out the trash.
[10:58] yumoto
    Hello!
[10:59] man
    Huh? Who's that?
[11:02] yumoto
    Hello!
[11:05] man
    Who's that guy?
[11:07] man
    That's Hakone Yumoto, the first-year.
[11:09] man
    He seems like a really nice guy.
[11:11] man
    I wonder if we could get him to be our manager.
[11:17] yumoto
    It feels so good getting things clean.
[11:19] yumoto
    Now, then...
[11:21] all
    Hakone Yumoto-kun!
[11:23] man
    Yumoto-kun, would you
    like to become our manager?
[11:27] man
    Hold on! We saw him first!
[11:30] man
    No, we saw him first!
[11:32] man
    No, we did!
[11:34] yumoto
    I'm sorry.
[11:35] yumoto
    I'm grateful for your invitations,
    but I have the Defense Club.
[11:40] yumoto
    Please let me do my best where I am now.
[11:43] all
    So cute!
[11:46] crowd
    Yumoto-kun, join our club!
[11:48] crowd
    Please, Yumoto-kun!
[11:50] crowd
    You're welcome with us!
[11:52] yumoto
    I told you, I can't.
[11:55] man
    He's really popular.
[11:56] man
    Is he really that good a guy?
[11:58] man
    You think we could get him to be our manager?
[12:05] man
    Oh, I didn't mean that we don't need you...
[12:08] man
    Yeah. You do a great job, Megawa.
[12:11] megawa
    I-It's okay. You don't have to defend me.
[12:15] megawa
    It's my own fault for getting complacent,
[12:17] megawa
    thinking I was the only
    popular glasses character around.
[12:25] gero
    His heart appears to be muddied by
    panic, jealousy, and self-loathing.
[12:30] ari
    Yes. I like him.
[12:33] kusa
    Not bad.
[12:35] kusa
    What do you think, Lord Zundar?
[12:40] zun
    Fine, indeed.
[12:41] zun
    He shall be our next target!
[12:44] zun
    Go, Caerula Adamas!
[12:46] both
    Yes, Lord Zundar!
[12:53] megawa
    Yumoto-kun...
[12:54] megawa
    You rocketed to the position of first-year
    student most desired as a manager.
[12:59] megawa
    I envy you...
[13:00] megawa
    No, I loathe you...
[13:02] megawa
    That should be my position!
SIGN    Gero Akoya
    Born April 24th
    Blood Type B / Taurus
    Hobbies: Aromatherapy
    Likes: Beautiful things,
    macarons
[13:20] yumoto
    Senpai!
[13:22] atsu
    Yumoto. Where have you been?
[13:24] yumoto
    A whole lot of sports clubs have
    asked me to be their manager.
[13:27] yumoto
    But my love for the Defense Club hasn't changed.
[13:32] en
    Am I the only one who found
    Yumoto really cute just now?
[13:36] ryuu
    I thought so, too. Damn.
[13:38] atsu
    Well, I've always thought
    he was cute, as a kouhai.
[13:41] io
    Yes, but only as a kouhai.
[13:43] monster
    No!
[13:49] monster
    The position of #1 boy in terms of
    pleasant, cute, and manager material,
[13:53] monster
    or PCM for short, is mine!
[13:58] ryuu
    One of these, huh?
[13:59] atsu
    But were you aware of "PCM"?
[14:01] io
    No. And I don't understand what it means.
[14:04] en
    Yeah. I can't get excited about this.
[14:06] wom
    Don't be like that! Come on, everyone!
[14:09] wom
    Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[14:11] en
    For heaven's sake...
[14:14] en
    Love Making.
[14:19] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[14:22] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[14:24] io
    Love is all!
[14:26] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[14:29] atsu
    Wait, Scarlet's missing!
[14:33] wom
    He's still over there!
[14:35] monster
    Give back my position!
[14:37] monster
    PCM Beam!
[14:40] en
    Look out!
[14:43] ryuu
    What's wrong, Yumoto? Transform already!
[14:46] yumoto
    I can't "transform."
[14:49] en
    No, no, no...
[14:50] atsu
    You've done it plenty of times!
[14:52] io
    You even took the initiative.
[14:53] ryuu
    Yeah.
[14:54] yumoto
    But I'm scared! Senpai, save me!
[14:57] en
    What do we do about this?
[14:59] ryuu
    Crap. For a moment there, I actually
    thought about wanting to protect him!
[15:02] wom
    If it's come to this, we should
    force him to transform!
[15:06] yumoto
    Please don't!
[15:07] yumoto
    I don't want to transform! Senpai!
[15:09] monster
    Why are you ignoring me to flirt with him?!
[15:17] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[15:27] en
    Guys!
[15:32] monster
    That's so mean. Coming at me all at once...
[15:35] monster
    I don't even want to fight!
[15:38] ---
    Huh?
[15:39] io
    He's the one who's overwhelmingly stronger.
[15:42] atsu
    Who the heck is this guy, anyway?
[15:44] monster
    Position-wise, I'm a character
    who should be protected!
[15:49] monster
    I'm not the one who
    should be on the front lines!
[15:51] monster
    And yet... And yet...!
[15:59] ryuu
    He's really strong!
[16:00] io
    His reason for fighting is so absurd
    that I can't predict his next move!
[16:04] atsu
    Normally, Scarlet would say "It's okay!"
    and change the tone of the fight, but...
[16:08] yumoto
    Help me!
[16:10] en
    Yeah, that.
[16:11] monster
    Normally, at a time like this,
    the others would come to save me!
[16:16] monster
    That's my position, and yet...
[16:21] all
    Megawa!
[16:24] megawa
    Senpai...
[16:26] man
    You okay, Megawa?
[16:27] megawa
    Senpai...
[16:28] man
    It's okay now!
[16:29] man
    We'll protect you!
[16:32] megawa
    Senpai...
[16:33] monster
    So why do I have to be the one fighting?!
[16:52] atsu
    He's so powerful...
[16:54] io
    We're going to lose at this rate!
[16:55] ryuu
    Damn.
[16:57] wom
    I'm begging you! Please, transform!
[17:00] yumoto
    I can't. I'm scared.
[17:03] wom
    But if this keeps up, your friends
    will be blown to smithereens!
[17:07] yumoto
    But...
[17:08] wom
    There's no choice. I'll use my ultimate weapon!
[17:11] wom
    If you transform and fight,
    you may cuddle me as much as you want!
[17:16] wom
    Come on! Cuddle me!
    Cuddle me to your heart's content!
[17:20] yumoto
    Stop that! It's indecent!
[17:23] monster
    Now, everyone. If you
    don't want me to beat you,
[17:26] monster
    you should protect me,
    dote on me, be kind to me!
[17:30] monster
    Come on. Come on. Come on!
[17:33] en
    Just because you say "come on"...
[17:35] monster
    If you don't, I'll beat all of you.
[17:37] monster
    It's gonna hurt! You'll be ripped to shreds!
[17:41] ryuu
    Damn.
[17:42] en
    Why...?
[17:45] monster
    If you don't want that,
    then love me and only me!
[17:48] monster
    Come on. Come on. Come on!
[17:57] wom
    This isn't good.
[17:58] wom
    We've never been in a situation this bad!
[18:01] monster
    Come on, dote on me!
[18:04] ryuu
    Damn... This is no joke!
[18:06] io
    We'll never give in!
[18:08] atsu
    That's right. We refuse!
[18:11] en
    Yeah, we refuse.
[18:13] en
    We've already got a cute kouhai to dote on.
[18:17] wom
    He means you!
[18:19] ryuu
    That's right. Our kouhai slot
    has already been filled.
[18:22] io
    He's all we need!
[18:24] atsu
    And we have no plans to be swayed by another!
[18:28] monster
    Then... Then... I'll beat you all!
[18:30] monster
    I really will... I really will beat you all!
[18:36] wom
    This... This is bad!
[18:37] wom
    They're all... They're all going to be beaten!
[18:46] yumoto
    I won't let it...
[18:48] yumoto
    I won't let it happen!
[18:50] yumoto
    Love Making!
[18:55] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[18:56] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[18:58] yumoto
    Take this, Glasses Monster!
[19:07] io
    Took you long enough.
[19:09] atsu
    We've been waiting.
[19:10] en
    Shall we do the usual, then?
[19:13] yumoto
    Sure!
[19:19] yumoto
    Let's go, Glasses Monster!
[19:20] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[19:23] en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[19:25] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[19:28] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[19:30] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[19:46] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[19:53] monster
    Is cuteness a sin?!
[20:02] yumoto
    You have a team who needs you, too.
[20:06] yumoto
    Do your best in the place where you belong.
[20:09] yumoto
    Love Shower!
[20:18] monster
    What is this warmth?
[20:21] monster
    I see... So this is love.
[20:30] yumoto
    Love is over!
[20:32] wom
    I'm so happy! You're back to your usual self!
[20:38] en
    Come to think of it, I haven't seen
    Tawarayama with you at all today.
[20:41] en
    Are you sure this is okay?
[20:43] ---
    Gulp!
[20:44] ryuu
    I bet he's completely decomposed.
[20:46] wom
    H-H-He'll be just fine, really.
[20:53] kino
    Did you get that?
[20:54] taz
    Perfect.
[20:57] kino
    Lord Hireashi should be very pleased by this.
[21:02] gora
    Yumoto!
[21:05] goro
    Yumoto!
[21:07] yumoto
    Big bro?
[21:08] gora
    You shouldn't be here. You still have a fever.
[21:11] yumoto
    Sorry I came to school without telling you.
[21:15] gora
    You had me worried.
[21:16] atsu
    Wait, shouldn't our highly
    advanced camouflage prevent him
[21:20] atsu
    from seeing our true identities?
[21:22] en
    Does his brother know who we are?
[21:24] atsu
    No way.
[21:25] ryuu
    Then how'd he know that was his brother?
[21:28] io
    Through the power of brotherly love, I guess?
[21:35] gero
    We lost again...
[21:37] ari
    And there's another strange one among them.
[21:42] kusa
    That man... Exactly who is he?
[21:46] hire
    Well, Kinosaki-chan?
[21:48] hire
    Did you get a good shot?
[21:50] hire
    Did you really?
[21:53] hire
    Wow, we've been stuck in a rut all this time,
[21:56] hire
    but this time it's perfect?
[21:59] hire
    Can I really trust you?
[22:01] hire
    Then once you get some good numbers,
[22:03] hire
    we'll be eating sushi in Ginza,
    if you know what I mean.
[23:40] zun
    At last, our plan is entering the final phase!
[23:44] zun
    Commander Hireashi, leave this to me.
[23:46] zun
    I swear I shall bring results
    that meet your expectations!
SIGN    Next Time
SIGN    The Trial Called Love
[23:50] zun
    Next time: The Trial Called Love.
[23:52] zun
    Zundar!

11 - The Trial Called Love

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    The Trial Called Love
[01:37] man
    Beniya, we don't have enough.
[01:38] man
    Can we really finish this
    with just three days to go?
[01:41] man
    I'm hungry. Let's send for a shopping run.
SIGN    Binan High School
[01:45] man
    The class or club that wins the
    popularity vote gets a cash prize, right?
[01:49] man
    Oh, that's right. That's what
    the Press Society guys said.
[01:53] man
    Speaking of which, I heard the
    Press Society is broadcasting it.
[01:55] man
    What do you mean, broadcasting?
SIGN    Binan High School Festival Grand Prix
SIGN    Who Will Win?!
[01:57] man
    Like on the internet? Really?
[02:00] kino
    Really!
[02:03] kino
    Please allow our media to cover this!
SIGN    Earth Defense Club (lol)
[02:07] ryuu
    I told you, we should do a "how to date" class.
[02:09] io
    No, we should have an
    investment awareness campaign.
[02:12] en
    I don't really want to participate
    in this school festival stuff.
[02:17] atsu
    I figured you'd say that, En-chan.
[02:19] en
    It's such a pain in the ass, I want to die.
[02:21] io
    What are you saying, Yufuin-senpai?
[02:24] io
    There's a cash prize on the line.
[02:26] io
    Why wouldn't you pick up
    money just lying on the ground?
[02:29] en
    Bending over is a pain in the ass.
[02:31] ryuu
    He's hardcore lazy.
[02:33] atsu
    But as long as we're being allotted
    a club room and club budget,
[02:36] atsu
    the student council says we have
    to show the fruits of our activities.
[02:39] yumoto
    Here! Here! Here here here!
[02:42] yumoto
    A restaurant! We should do a restaurant!
[02:44] en
    What is that, a kindergartner's dream?
[02:46] io
    No, that's a pretty realistic idea for Yumoto.
[02:50] io
    Do you know the cost of coffee, for example?
[02:54] ryuu
    What, is it easy money?
[02:55] io
    It also depends on our ability
    to draw customers, though.
[02:55] [SONG] sign
    In cold storage
    Don't open!
[02:58] en
    But everyone else is already gonna do
    stuff like cafés and coffee shops.
[03:02] io
    That's true. It would be hard
    without a selling point.
[03:05] ryuu
    We do have a selling point.
[03:06] atsu
    We do?
[03:09] ryuu
    Love Making!
[03:13] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[03:14] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[03:17] ryuu
    That we're transforming heroes!
[03:19] en
    No way.
[03:21] en
    We've worked really hard to
    hide our identities up to now.
[03:24] en
    Revealing them for something like
    this would make that all pointless.
[03:27] ryuu
    Well, that's different.
[03:29] ryuu
    Why don't we just get Wombat
    to work something out
[03:32] ryuu
    with his advanced scientific technology?
[03:34] wom
    Hey! Wait a minute!
[03:36] wom
    It would be unheard of for missionaries
    of love to pursue for-profit ventures!
[03:41] ryuu
    What are you saying?
[03:43] ryuu
    If they eat delicious food,
    they'll feel love and happiness, right?
[03:47] ryuu
    It's a proper love activity. A "lovetivity."
[03:51] wom
    Lovetivity...
[03:52] atsu
    That's Ryuu for you.
[03:54] atsu
    His sweet-talking technique is unsurpassed.
[03:56] en
    Should you really be impressed by that?
[03:57] atsu
    I was just thinking it'd be nice
    to have a refrigerator, though.
[04:01] en
    Why's that?
[04:03] atsu
    Well, we'd always have cold drinks on hand.
[04:06] atsu
    A microwave would be great, too.
[04:08] en
    Are you all really into this restaurant idea?
[04:10] ryuu
    Let's do it!
[04:12] wom
    Lovetivity...
[04:13] atsu
    Coffee, black tea, and cake, maybe?
[04:16] en
    So it's decided that we're doing it, huh?
[04:18] ryuu
    Love out.
[04:21] yumoto
    I think we should serve sushi.
[04:22] io
    Nope.
[04:23] yumoto
    Why?
[04:24] io
    It takes too much work.
[04:26] io
    And we'd be handling raw fish.
[04:29] io
    It would be bad for us if
    any problems were to occur.
[04:31] ryuu
    Yeah. It's dangerous to serve
    stuff that isn't fully cooked.
[04:35] yumoto
    Curry would be good, then.
[04:37] ryuu
    This isn't just your decision, you know.
[04:38] yumoto
    "I would like curry," then.
[04:40] io
    If we do curry, we could make it in
    the club room, then just heat it up.
[04:44] en
    Atsushi makes good curry.
[04:46] atsu
    I have to make it?
[04:48] yumoto
    Kinugawa Curry! Yeah!
[04:50] ryuu
    I can't stand Thai curry, though.
[04:54] en
    Why? Because it's spicy?
[04:56] ryuu
    Actually, it's the coconut milk.
[05:00] ryuu
    I prefer thick home curry!
[05:04] io
    Dry curry is quite good, too.
[05:06] yumoto
    I like everything!
[05:08] wom
    Exactly what kind of food is this "curry"?
[05:14] yumoto
    I don't mind Thai curry, Atsushi-senpai.
[05:18] yumoto
    Pork is my favorite, though.
[05:20] atsu
    I have no idea what you're talking about.
[05:23] yumoto
    Weren't you worrying about
    what kind of curry to make?
[05:27] yumoto
    Because your face looked like this.
[05:30] atsu
    What? When?
[05:32] atsu
    And I don't think I looked like that.
[05:34] yumoto
    Do you actually not like curry?
[05:37] yumoto
    Gratin or napolitan would be fine, too!
[05:40] atsu
    No... I do like curry, but...
[05:44] atsu
    I'm not sure...
[05:45] atsu
    What was it?
[05:47] yumoto
    It gives you heartburn?
[05:48] atsu
    Maybe. Something about it just bothers me.
[05:52] yumoto
    Then you should take a bath and go to sleep.
[05:55] yumoto
    If you just take a bath,
    most things will work themselves out!
[05:58] yumoto
    That's what my big bro says.
[06:00] atsu
    You're right. I guess I'll do that.
SIGN    Binan Festival
SIGN    My Essays
SIGN    Honey Lemon
[06:22] ari
    When you make that expression,
[06:24] ari
    it makes me start to feel melancholy, too.
[06:27] kusa
    What kind of expression is that?
[06:28] ari
    Like you've smelled something foul in the air.
[06:31] gero
    Now that you mention it...
[06:33] gero
    I've been smelling curry for a while now.
[06:36] kusa
    I don't understand people who eat curry.
[06:40] gero
    Doesn't everyone love curry?
[06:42] gero
    Well, I suppose I wouldn't go
    out of my way to eat it, either.
[06:45] ari
    Why?
[06:46] gero
    The dishes look less than
    beautiful after you eat it.
[06:50] kusa
    That's not the problem!
[06:52] kusa
    The powerful stench.
    The stimulation against the tongue.
[06:54] kusa
    It's not something civilized
    humans should be eating.
[06:57] ari
    You're that against it?
[06:59] kusa
    It's a thing we should object
    to on the most basic level.
[07:02] ari
    My, my.
[07:04] ari
    I don't know about such a radical way of thinking.
[07:07] kusa
    As the rightful rulers of this planet,
[07:09] kusa
    we have the duty, the responsibility, and the right.
[07:12] kusa
    By the way, I haven't seen Lord Zundar yet today.
[07:16] gero
    He's been going out a lot lately.
[07:18] ari
    Maybe it's mating season!
SIGN    Press Society
SIGN    Binan High School Festival
    Grand Prix
SIGN    Who Will Win?!
[07:26] hire
    There's no denying you're in a rut.
[07:30] zun
    But I've been dedicated to
    devising clever schemes every week...
[07:33] hire
    That's not good enough!
[07:35] hire
    The masses get bored easily.
[07:38] zun
    I am aware of that.
[07:39] hire
    But anyway, this planet
    called Earth must be jinxed.
[07:44] hire
    I mean, we've conquered a lot of planets, right?
[07:48] hire
    Some of them have given
    us some trouble, of course.
[07:50] hire
    But we've conquered the
    vast majority of them, right?
[07:54] hire
    And yet the Earth alone...
[07:56] hire
    Why is this the only place
    where we've been canceled?
[08:02] zun
    Canceled? What was the reason?
[08:05] hire
    Because it didn't go well.
    An obstacle got in the way.
[08:08] zun
    Obstacle?
[08:09] zun
    Still, I don't think the beings of this
    planet possess any special abilities.
[08:14] hire
    No, they do.
[08:17] hire
    Stupid power.
[08:19] zun
    They seem to call it "love," or some such...
[08:22] hire
    It ain't love, stupid!
[08:24] hire
    It's stupid power.
[08:26] zun
    So what kind of soldiers do we need
    to oppose this "stupid love power"?
[08:31] hire
    Good question. We might need
    an even more negative person.
[08:36] zun
    Negative?
[08:37] hire
    Yeah. Someone soggy, viscous,
    and goopy who will really stick with it.
[08:43] hire
    A human steeped in grudge and discontent.
[08:50] yumoto
    Big bro, what's wrong?
[08:52] yumoto
    You don't have your usual edge.
[08:54] goro
    I-It's nothing.
[08:57] gora
    Hey, there's something I want to ask you.
[09:00] gora
    The other day, when you...
[09:02] yumoto
    You mean the "first cold in my life" incident?
[09:06] gora
    Yeah, that's right.
[09:08] yumoto
    I don't remember it very well.
[09:11] yumoto
    I was carrying a cleaning rag.
[09:13] gora
    A cleaning rag?
[09:14] yumoto
    Yeah. And for some reason, I had glasses.
[09:16] gora
    Glasses?
[09:17] yumoto
    And a baseball.
[09:19] gora
    Really?
[09:20] yumoto
    I think. Sorry if I'm wrong.
[09:23] yumoto
    So what was it you wanted to ask me?
[09:26] gora
    Well, Yumoto...
[09:28] gora
    What do you think of transformation...
[09:31] gora
    Deviation and such?
[09:33] yumoto
    Deviation?
[09:34] yumoto
    Has he discovered some weird hobby?
[09:37] yumoto
    Well, I think it's fine!
[09:40] yumoto
    People are free to do as they like.
[09:43] yumoto
    As long as they aren't bothering
    others, I'd encourage them.
[09:46] gora
    I see.
[09:49] yumoto
    Did he want me to stop him?
[09:59] yumoto
    Let's eat!
[10:01] all
    Eat!
[10:07] yumoto
    It's good!
[10:10] yumoto
    Curry's so good! Good curry!
[10:13] ryuu
    Shut up and eat.
[10:14] yumoto
    But don't you think the Kinugawa Curry is good?
[10:17] ryuu
    It's not about that. It's because you're annoying.
[10:19] en
    I'm more fascinated
[10:22] en
    by the surrealism of Wombat eating curry.
[10:26] wom
    Human know-how produces
    such a condensed taste!
[10:29] io
    300 yen for a plate of curry.
[10:31] io
    And if we factor in the cash prize...
[10:34] ryuu
    Wow, you seem confident we'll win.
[10:36] io
    Of course I am.
[10:38] yumoto
    Can we start now, then?
[10:40] wom
    Love Making into the Battle Lovers!
[10:45] yumoto
    Love Making!
[11:12] yumoto
    The Sparkling Prince!
[11:13] yumoto
    Battle Lover Scarlet!
[11:16] en
    Love Making!
[11:26] en
    The Flashing Prince!
[11:28] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[11:31] atsu
    Love Making!
[11:41] atsu
    The Piercing Prince!
[11:42] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[11:45] io
    Love Making!
[11:55] io
    The Roaring Prince!
[11:57] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[12:00] ryuu
    Love Making!
[12:10] ryuu
    The Thrilling Prince!
[12:11] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[12:14] en
    You, who befoul our beloved Earth!
[12:17] ryuu
    No justice can come from loveless power!
[12:20] io
    Love is all!
[12:22] atsu
    Live for love! Die for love!
[12:25] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[12:27] five
    Battle Lovers!
[12:29] yumoto
    Feel the power...
[12:32] five
    Of love!
[12:35] en
    You really don't think they'll realize
[12:37] en
    that we're the same people as those guys?
[12:41] io
    The blur isn't on us, right?
[12:43] atsu
    Will that be okay?
[12:45] wom
    It's fine. My highly advanced scientific
    technology has mumble mumble...
[12:49] en
    What do you mean, "mumble mumble"?
[12:51] yumoto
    Now, let's go get customers!
SIGN    Zundar
    Born August 18th
    (converted to Earth calendar)
    Blood Type B / Leo
    Hobbies: Secret
    Likes: Escargot
[13:00] yumoto
    Deliciousness that shakes the Earth!
[13:02] yumoto
    Even an alien would be shocked!
[13:04] guy
    Why are you dressed like that, Hakone?
[13:05] yumoto
    We're transforming heroes!
[13:07] yumoto
    You know, we've seen them around
    the school a lot lately, right?
[13:10] yumoto
    That weird group of five.
[13:11] yumoto
    We're cosplaying as them!
[13:13] io
    It's not a lie, I guess.
[13:15] en
    And yet, it's a perfect cover story.
[13:17] ryuu
    Yumoto's amazing.
[13:19] yumoto
    Cosplay Hero Curry! Now on sale!
[13:22] guy
    Cosplays, heroes, and curry?
    Isn't that a bit too much at once?
[13:26] yumoto
    Put on more! More and more and more!
[13:29] en
    We don't have a choice.
    I guess we'd better work, too.
[13:32] en
    I don't want to have any leftovers.
[13:33] ryuu
    Sure.
[13:34] io
    Let's go.
[13:35] en
    Atsushi, you handle the curry stock.
[13:37] atsu
    Roger.
[13:38] wom
    Give me something to do, too!
[13:41] en
    Wombat, you and Mr. Tawarayama watch the store.
[13:45] wom
    I accept!
[13:48] tawara
    Defense curry.
[13:51] tawara
    It's good.
[13:53] en
    Okay.
[13:54] en
    A little more enthusiasm.
[13:56] wom
    Why do I have to suffer such poor treatment?
[13:59] en
    Mr. Tawarayama can't help
    unless both his hands are free.
SIGN    Defense Club Curry 300 yen
[14:02] wom
    Even so...
[14:04] en
    Well, you can't go away from him.
[14:06] wom
    But...
[14:07] ryuu
    Sir, you're not doing any work.
[14:15] atsu
    It's still got an edge to it.
[14:18] atsu
    Oops.
[14:20] kusa
    Foolish humans who lack ambition
    or aspiration have no right to exist.
[14:25] kusa
    They are worthless.
[14:28] kusa
    I will purge ugly things, foolish things,
    and worthless things from the world.
[14:34] kusa
    The world should be orderly, beautiful, and regular.
[14:40] kusa
    And yet, what is this curry stench?
[14:43] kusa
    Why is it drifting in from over here?
[14:54] atsu
    Um...
[14:56] atsu
    Want some?
[14:57] kusa
    Who would stoop to eating something so humble?!
[15:06] atsu
    Kin-chan?
[15:07] kusa
    Do not call me by that name.
[15:09] atsu
    Kin-chan, you're our enemy? That can't be true.
[15:17] kusa
    Truly base and vulgar.
[15:19] kusa
    Its wicked stimulation poisons the sense
    of taste and destroys the sense of smell.
[15:23] kusa
    Worse, its offensive appearance
    mocks the sense of sight.
[15:27] kusa
    I cannot fathom a person like you
    who can this thing known as curry,
[15:31] kusa
    Kinugawa Atsushi.
[15:35] atsu
    No. My name is...
[15:37] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[15:40] kusa
    I see. So our battle was fated, then!
[15:45] zun
    Go, Aurite!
[15:47] zun
    The time has come to unleash your power
[15:48] zun
    and achieve your longstanding desire!
[15:52] kusa
    Conquest!
[15:59] kusa
    My name is Dark Aurite.
[16:02] kusa
    The Black Chevalier, writhing in darkness!
[16:06] kusa
    Ater Aurum!
[16:13] gero
    What's that?
[16:14] ari
    That's where the student council room is.
[16:16] en
    What's that?
[16:17] ari
    That's where our club room is.
[16:26] atsu
    Wait! Let's do this after the culture festival's over!
[16:28] atsu
    I want to sell the curry I worked so hard to make!
[16:30] kusa
    Curry, you say?
[16:32] kusa
    Just leave it to rot!
[16:35] atsu
    No! That curry's important to me!
[16:37] kusa
    Why? Why curry, of all things?
[16:40] atsu
    If we're talking about "of all things,"
[16:41] atsu
    why do you have to be my
    enemy of all things, Kin-chan?
[16:46] kusa
    Don't call me by that name!
[16:50] guy
    Wow! Who's putting on that performance?
[16:52] guy
    Cool! There's lights and everything!
[16:55] ari
    What's going on?
[16:57] gero
    It must be serious, to make
    the president forget himself.
[17:00] en
    Why is Atsushi fighting?
[17:03] both
    President?
[17:04] both
    Atsushi?
[17:07] gero
    Why can we see their faces?
[17:09] ryuu
    The blur isn't on us, right?
[17:13] taw
    Mumble mumble, and all.
[17:15] all
    You guys are...
[17:16] both
    Caerula Adamas?
[17:19] both
    The Battle Lovers?
[17:20] all
    Um...
[17:22] both
    Conquest!
[17:25] ari
    The Silver Chevalier, rustling young leaves!
[17:28] ari
    Argent!
[17:33] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier, making flowers bloom!
[17:35] gero
    Perlite!
[17:40] gora
    A bad omen.
[17:42] gero
    How dare you deceive us all this time?!
[17:45] ryuu
    That's our line!
[17:48] ari
    Learning your identities is
    a real load off our minds!
[17:52] en
    It's hard to see something that's
    right under your nose, I guess!
[17:58] io
    What's going to happen to the curry?
[18:00] io
    What about the profits from Cosplay Hero Curry?
[18:03] wom
    Mumble mumble, I'd say!
[18:07] kusa
    Gigant Aurum!
[18:14] atsu
    Yumo—
[18:14] yumoto
    Why are you two fighting?!
[18:18] kusa
    This is not such a trivial thing!
[18:20] yumoto
    But it is a fight, isn't it?
[18:22] atsu
    He just hates me, that's all.
[18:25] kusa
    That's right.
[18:26] kusa
    I hate you, Kinugawa Atsushi.
[18:29] kusa
    Ever since that day you rejected me!
[18:33] yumoto
    Rejected? What did you do, Atsushi-senpai?
[18:36] atsu
    Rejected? Did I do that to you, Kin-chan?
[18:40] kusa
    If you're playing dumb, it's pathetic.
[18:42] kusa
    If you really have forgotten,
    then I'll consign you to death!
[18:47] kusa
    At-chan, you're coming by my house, right?
[18:49] atsu
    I can't today. I've got something to do.
[18:52] kusa
    Okay...
[18:58] en
    Whoops.
[18:59] atsu
    Th-Thanks.
[19:01] en
    Kinugawa? Where are you going?
[19:03] atsu
    CoCoKaRa Curry.
[19:04] en
    That's right. Today's their extra-spicy curry day.
[19:07] atsu
    Yufuin, you like curry?
[19:08] en
    Pretty well.
[19:09] atsu
    Want to go with me?
[19:12] atsu
    I have a coupon.
SIGN    All curry 20% off
[19:14] en
    So do I.
[19:15] en
    If I had to choose which I hate more,
    mild curry or stinky natto,
[19:18] en
    I'd choose mild curry any time.
[19:20] atsu
    That's right. There are people
    who find even the mild stuff spicy.
[19:24] kusa
    Stupid curry.
[19:29] atsu
    Morning, Kin-chan.
[19:36] atsu
    Kin-chan?
[19:40] en
    What, did you have a fight or something?
[19:42] atsu
    I don't remember having one...
[19:44] en
    What, you're fighting and
    you don't even know why?
[19:49] en
    Why not ask him?
[19:50] atsu
    I'd better not.
[19:51] atsu
    If he doesn't want to talk about it,
    I'd feel bad trying to force it out of him.
[19:56] kusa
    You broke our oath!
[19:59] atsu
    Oath?
[20:04] atsu
    What did you wish for?
[20:06] kusa
    I wished for us to stay friends forever.
[20:10] atsu
    You don't need to wish on a shooting star for that.
[20:15] atsu
    'Cause we'll be friends forever, no matter what.
[20:22] kusa
    You stomped on decorum!
[20:28] gora
    Yumoto...
[20:31] gora
    I'm coming now.
[20:38] kusa
    Don't get in my way!
[20:39] yumoto
    Please don't have a falling-out in front of me!
[20:42] yumoto
    I hate that kind of thing!
[20:44] kusa
    In that case...
[20:48] kusa
    I'll destroy you both together!
[20:53] gora
    Do they intend to do the same thing again?
[21:03] io
    Fight!
[21:05] ryuu
    One shot?
[21:06] yumoto
    Hey, you're late!
[21:10] atsu
    En-chan!
[21:11] en
    Sorry I'm late.
[21:18] en
    When I hear that story of yours, Kusatsu,
    it sounds to me like you're just sulking!
[21:22] kusa
    Shut up, you coward!
[21:24] io
    We won't stand silent while you
    slander the good name of curry!
[21:43] gero
    It's presumptuous to think that
    the likes of you could oppose us.
[21:46] ari
    If you withdraw now, we won't harm you.
[21:51] yumoto
    I am going to stop this stupid fight between you!
[21:54] hire
    Oh? It's being drawn out that long?
[21:57] hire
    That's great. Just what I wanted.
[23:39] [SONG] ---
    Next Time
[23:43] [SONG] ---
    At Last
[23:47] [SONG] ---
    The Final Episode!

12 - Love Forever

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:10] yumoto
    I'm going to stop this
    stupid fight between you!
[00:12] hire
    Oh? It's being drawn out that long?
[00:15] hire
    That's great. Just what I wanted.
[00:25] yumoto
    Student Council President!
    Let's talk about this!
[00:28] kusa
    Don't be absurd!
[00:30] kusa
    I have power!
[00:32] kusa
    Power that you lack.
    Power to cleanse the world!
[00:41] gora
    Don't be deceived!
[00:45] gora
    This has all been prearranged!
[00:47] gora
    It's a set-up!
[00:49] yumoto
    Big bro Gora?
[00:50] atsu
    What was set up?
[00:52] gora
    All of it! This guy set up all of it!
[00:55] hire
    Let me go! Let me go, I say!
[00:57] hire
    Just who do you think I am?
[01:00] kusa
    A talking goldfish? It couldn't be...
[01:02] gora
    Now, Hireashi! Confess everything!
[01:07] hire
    I'll talk! I'll talk!
[01:08] hire
    I'll tell them everything. Just don't crush me!
[01:12] gora
    Now, hurry!
[01:13] hire
    Yes, yes, yes!
[01:14] hire
    This is a reality show targeted
    at the whole universe!
[01:18] hire
    The things you say, the things you do,
    every move you make...
[01:22] hire
    All of it, down to the tiniest detail,
    is being broadcast across the universe!
[01:26] all
    Broadcast across the universe?!
[01:28] hire
    They're watching you Earthlings divided
    into two groups and fighting each other!
[01:33] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[01:35] en
    I never thought I'd have a moment in
    my life when I'd say "What did you say?!"
[01:40] en
    But this is a real
    "What did you say?!" moment.
[01:42] kusa
    Broadcast... across the universe?
[01:44] zun
    Chief Hireashi!
[01:50] yumoto
    Big bro!
[01:52] zun
    Chief Hireashi! Are you all right?
[01:53] hire
    Of course I'm not all right!
    You took too long getting here!
[01:56] zun
    I am very sorry!
[01:58] hire
    Kinosaki-chan! Continue the broadcast!
[02:01] kino
    Okay! This is Kinosaki on the scene!
[02:04] kino
    Now let's have a talk with the leader
    of the Conquest Club, Kusatsu Kinshiro!
[02:09] kino
    How are you feeling right now?
[02:12] kino
    Say a few words to our viewers.
[02:17] kino
    Okay! That was Dark Aurite,
    A.K.A. Kusatsu Kinshiro,
[02:20] kino
    whose expression suggests
    some lingering shock!
[02:24] kusa
    That means...
[02:26] kusa
    Everything I've said and done
[02:28] kusa
    has all been watched?
[02:30] kino
    Yes, that's right!
[02:32] kino
    In addition to your battles,
    there have been hidden cameras set up
[02:36] kino
    in your student council room
    and personal spaces, as well!
[02:39] kino
    It's all being broadcast
    throughout the whole galaxy!
[02:43] kusa
    Throughout the whole galaxy?
[02:45] kino
    Yes! The faint yearning
    for your childhood friend,
[02:48] kino
    the obstinacy, the angry outbursts,
    the unavoidable failures of understanding...
[02:52] kino
    You're a stand-out character!
[02:54] kino
    You're a conversation topic for thousands
    of millions of people across the universe!
[03:00] kusa
    I-It can't be...
[03:01] kino
    It's the tsundere in you.
[03:04] yumoto
    Big bro! Big bro!
[03:05] yumoto
    Speak to me! Don't die!
[03:08] zun
    What are you doing, Caerula Adamas?
[03:10] zun
    Go and defeat the Battle Lovers!
[03:13] kusa
    What's the point in fighting them now?
[03:16] zun
    What was that?
[03:18] kusa
    Now that everything's been brought to light,
[03:22] kusa
    all my talk of order rings completely hollow.
[03:25] zun
    To whom do you think I gave
[03:28] zun
    the power to rule the world?
[03:32] zun
    Tch.
[03:34] hire
    If it's come to this, go to plan B!
[03:36] hire
    Do it, Zun-chan!
[03:37] zun
    Sir!
[03:38] zun
    Zundar Needles, activate!
[03:44] yumoto
    Big bro?
[03:45] atsu
    This is...
[03:52] en
    G-Gora-san!
[04:06] yumoto
    B-Big bro Gora!
[04:08] gora
    My name is Wood-Chopper Monster.
[04:11] gora
    I will chop wood, and the world, in two!
[04:15] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[04:16] en
    Okay, that's already the second
    "What did you say?" of my life.
[04:21] ari
    He became a monster?
[04:23] gero
    So it wasn't our power doing that?
[04:30] yumoto
    Why... Why is my brother Gora...
[04:35] gora
    Chop!
[04:40] yumoto
    Stop it, big bro!
[04:46] io
    He's so powerful...
[04:47] ryuu
    That's Yumoto's big brother for you.
[04:49] atsu
    All that daily wood chopping
    wasn't just for show.
[04:52] en
    And what's with the hatchet?
    That's a bit obsessive.
[04:55] yumoto
    Why are you so good at this, big bro?
[04:58] hire
    He actually noticed! Well done! Well done!
[05:00] yumoto
    Huh? What?
[05:02] hire
    Now it's time for a nostalgic playback of old times!
SIGN    TV Universe
[05:09] hire
    Universal Calendar 12015.
[05:12] hire
    My employer, TV Universe,
    sent me, the skilled Hireashi,
SIGN    Reality Show
SIGN    Can I Destroy the Earth?
[05:18] hire
    to be the director of a reality show:
    Can I Destroy the Earth?
[05:25] hire
    There was a despicable, wicked Earthling.
[05:27] hire
    His name was Hakone Gora.
[05:31] gora
    Chop!
[05:33] gora
    Chop!
[05:34] gora
    Chop!
[05:43] hire
    That man vanquished all the monsters
    we sent, one after another.
[05:48] hire
    He had no consideration for how badly our viewers
[05:51] hire
    wanted to see the Earth conquered and destroyed,
[05:53] hire
    and no ability to read the mood.
    He made all our plans come to nothing.
[05:57] atsu
    Are you saying Yumoto's big brother was
    the previous generation of Battle Lovers?
[06:02] yumoto
    Oh, now that you mention it...
[06:04] yumoto
    My brother would always sharpen
    his hatchet after I went to bed...
[06:08] yumoto
    I saw him go out somewhere
    after that, lots of times.
[06:12] yumoto
    I was too scared to ask
    where he was going, though.
[06:15] io
    That would be pretty scary.
[06:17] ryuu
    Yeah, on a pants-pissing level.
[06:20] hire
    Once the program lost its
    concept, the ratings dwindled.
[06:24] hire
    In the end, it was tragically canceled.
[06:26] hire
    CIDE is the only show I've ever
    directed that got canceled!
[06:30] atsu
    CIDE?
[06:32] en
    I guess that's short for Can I Destroy the Earth?
[06:34] wom
    It's only natural that it was canceled!
[06:36] wom
    I could not allow such
    foolishness and barbarism!
[06:40] wom
    You received numerous complaints from
    the Space Ethics Improvement Organization,
[06:43] wom
    but you always make some vague
    excuse like "just watch it until the end"!
[06:47] en
    Wait, you've known about all this from the start?
[06:51] wom
    I'm just acting in the
    spirit of animal preservation!
[06:54] wom
    I couldn't stand watching the creatures of
    Earth wiped out for someone's entertainment!
[06:59] zun
    We're just giving the masses what they want to see!
[07:03] wom
    What kind of viral marketing is that?
[07:05] wom
    Your selfishness is your undoing!
[07:07] wom
    What about compliance, anyway?
[07:10] hire
    Compliance? Ha! I'm laughing so hard,
    I could brew tea in my navel!
[07:14] wom
    I don't want to hear
    talk of navels from a fish!
[07:16] zun
    Silence! You have a pouch, and that's just gross!
[07:19] wom
    Are you going there?
    Are you really going to go there?
[07:22] zun
    And what if I am?
[07:24] wom
    Then I'll go there, too!
[07:26] wom
    The way you're always twitching your nose?
[07:29] wom
    That really bothers me!
[07:31] zun
    I'm not twitching it!
[07:33] wom
    You are so!
[07:35] hire
    You really are.
[07:36] ---
    What?!
[07:37] en
    Cut it out, you guys.
[07:39] en
    I can't tell if it's cute or disgusting.
[07:42] hire
    Anyway, since CIDE was a failure,
[07:46] hire
    I was exiled to the company
    history compilation office.
[07:49] hire
    Even Aria-chan, the cabaret girl
    from Gotanda Planet, dumped me!
[07:52] hire
    It put me through the wringer!
[07:55] ryuu
    You go to cabaret clubs? Also, those exist?
[08:00] hire
    Oh, really? The numbers are through the roof?
[08:03] hire
    Okay, go at it! Make it look good!
[08:06] gora
    Chop!
[08:12] atsu
    Why did Gora-san...
[08:14] io
    He was standing there quietly all this time.
[08:16] ryuu
    Why did he decide to start moving again now?
[08:18] hire
    That's the kabuki rule!
[08:20] hire
    When the camera's rolling,
    everyone else stops moving.
[08:23] hire
    Until the speaker's done with
    their lines, they must stand quietly.
[08:26] hire
    More precisely, they're incapable of moving!
[08:28] gora
    Chop!
[08:29] gora
    Chop! Chop! Chop!
[08:33] hire
    Excellent!
[08:34] hire
    A former hero, fallen to the dark side.
    He becomes the ultimate enemy,
[08:38] hire
    and now stands in the way of his
    own flesh-and-blood little brother!
[08:41] yumoto
    Big bro, if you were really a hero once,
[08:44] yumoto
    how can you turn into a monster so easily?!
[08:46] yumoto
    Show some mettle, big bro!
[08:56] gora
    I refuse.
[09:03] yumoto
    Stop it, big bro!
[09:04] gora
    Chop!
[09:08] yumoto
    Stop it, I said!
[09:09] kino
    Oh, what a red-hot development!
[09:11] kino
    Whoever wins, we're guaranteed rave reviews!
[09:14] ryuu
    I'm not really excited about
    attacking Yumoto's brother, but...
[09:18] io
    This is no time for holding back!
[09:21] ryuu
    Vesta Ignit!
[09:23] io
    Sulfur Gaia!
[09:26] atsu
    Epinard Hurricane!
[09:27] en
    Cerulean Aqua!
[09:29] gora
    Chop!
[09:31] en
    It's no use! We're no match for him!
[09:33] yumoto
    Big bro! Come to your senses!
[09:35] gora
    I refuse!
[09:45] kino
    Look at that power!
[09:47] kino
    This is the Gora Power that
    drove CIDE to cancellation!
[09:50] ari
    Excuse me.
[09:51] ari
    It's Kinosaki-kun, isn't it?
[09:53] kino
    Yes, that's right.
[09:55] ari
    Are you through interviewing
    our student council president?
[09:58] kino
    Yes, I'm done.
[10:00] kino
    What's going on here is far more interesting.
[10:03] kino
    Woah!
[10:03] ari
    Got it.
[10:04] ari
    Then I have one more question for you.
[10:06] kino
    I'm busy right now. Can't it wait until later?
[10:09] ari
    No, it's a very simple question.
[10:11] ari
    Answer yes or no.
[10:13] ari
    Did you know about their plan from the start?
[10:17] ari
    And that's why you've
    been doing your research?
[10:19] kino
    That's right.
[10:21] ari
    I see.
[10:22] kino
    What is it?
[10:27] ari
    Akoya...
[10:28] gero
    It's the duty of the youngest member
    to handle this kind of work, right?
[10:41] en
    Yumoto!
[10:42] gora
    Chop!
[10:44] gora
    Chop!
[10:49] gora
    Chop!
[10:58] atsu
    Kin-chan!
[11:08] kusa
    What?
[11:10] atsu
    Are you okay, Kin-chan?
[11:15] kusa
    Why?
[11:16] atsu
    Because even though you
    might not feel the same way,
[11:19] atsu
    I still think of you as a friend.
[11:24] kusa
    At-chan...
[11:37] kusa
    "Cleanse" can also mean to
    make anew, to set things right.
[11:42] kusa
    In that case, perhaps I need to cleanse myself.
[11:47] gora
    Chop!
[11:48] gora
    Chop chop chop chop chop!
[11:54] gora
    Chop!
[11:59] gora
    Chop!
[12:05] yumoto
    Guys!
[12:06] en
    Now! Use the Love Attack!
[12:09] all
    Yeah!
[12:10] yumoto
    Sparkle, Lumiere of Love!
[12:12] Default;en
    Flash, Purifying Aqua!
[12:15] atsu
    Pierce, Gallant Hurricane!
[12:17] io
    Roar, Raging Gaia!
[12:20] ryuu
    Thrill, Blazing Ignit!
[12:35] yumoto
    Love Attack!
[12:41] gora
    Chop!
[12:44] yumoto
    The Love Attack...
[12:45] gora
    Chop!
[12:47] yumoto
    You won't chop us!
[12:52] gora
    Chop!
[12:54] yumoto
    Big bro, snap out of it!
[12:57] gora
    Chop!
[12:58] yumoto
    This isn't my big brother!
[13:01] gora
    Ch... Chop...
[13:03] yumoto
    If you become a minion of evil,
    who will chop the wood for the bath?
[13:07] gora
    Bath?
[13:09] yumoto
    That's right! The Kurotama Bath
    is everything to you, isn't it?
[13:13] gora
    Kurotama Bath...
[13:15] yumoto
    Remember the warmth of the bath!
[13:18] gora
    Warmth...?
[13:37] en
    Yumoto grew...
[13:38] atsu
    ...wings?
[13:39] ryuu
    He's an angel?
[13:40] io
    No way.
[13:42] wom
    That's the More Better Love Making!
[13:44] all
    More Better Love Making?!
[13:46] wom
    That's right!
[13:48] wom
    He's more better in every respect!
[13:49] wom
    In other words, he's the More Sparkling Prince!
[13:53] yumoto
    More Better Love Shower!
[14:02] gora
    What is this sensation?
[14:04] gora
    It seems to warm me to my core...
[14:07] gora
    Comfort... Healing...
[14:09] yumoto
    Big bro, this is a bath.
[14:12] gora
    I see. This is a bath.
[14:19] gora
    Baths are great.
[14:22] yumoto
    Love is over!
[14:24] hire
    It's not over yet!
[14:29] en
    Oh, fine! I'll say it as many times as you want!
[14:32] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[14:35] hire
    How dare you, how dare you,
    how dare you, how dare you?!
[14:38] hire
    You've rendered all my plans to nothing!
[14:42] yumoto
    That's...
[14:44] yumoto
    a porcupinefish?
[14:45] wom
    A goldfish and a hedgehog
    make a porcupinefish.
[14:47] wom
    It does make sense, logically...
[14:49] all
    No it doesn't!
[14:50] hire
    Go! Finish them!
[14:53] zun
    Roger that!
[14:55] zun
    Transform!
[15:04] hire
    Porcupine...
[15:06] zun
    fish!
[15:08] all
    Wh-What did you say?!
[15:21] yumoto
    I don't think so!
[15:30] kusa
    Ultima...
[15:31] trio
    Adamas!
[15:38] ryuu
    Why would the student council...
    I mean, Caerula Adamas help us?
[15:41] kusa
    As student council president,
    I couldn't turn a blind eye
[15:45] kusa
    to anyone causing harm to our students. That's all.
[15:48] atsu
    Thanks, Kin-chan.
[15:51] kusa
    Why?! Why are you like this, At-chan?
[15:55] kusa
    You being so nice just lets me be selfish!
[15:59] kusa
    It was the same then!
[16:00] kusa
    You should have gotten angry and
    told me not to take things out on you!
[16:03] kusa
    But because it was me, you didn't say anything.
[16:07] kusa
    You didn't do anything!
[16:08] kusa
    That's why I could never apologize to you!
[16:12] atsu
    Sorry.
[16:13] kusa
    I don't want an apology!
[16:16] atsu
    Sorry.
[16:20] ryuu
    Kinugawa-senpai, at times like this,
[16:22] ryuu
    you should just say "I understand"
    and take them gently in your arms.
[16:25] io
    That's just how you do things.
[16:27] atsu
    Does this mean we can walk
    home together and talk again?
[16:33] kusa
    Yeah.
[16:35] wom
    Oh, this is the true love known as friendship!
[16:39] wom
    It's a happy end!
[16:40] hire
    I told you, it hasn't ended yet!
[16:44] hire
    I almost got stuck following the kabuki rule!
[16:48] yumoto
    You still want to fight?!
[16:50] wom
    In that case, everyone turn More Better!
[16:54] en
    The More Flashing Prince!
[16:58] en
    Battle Lover Cerulean!
[17:00] atsu
    The More Piercing Prince!
[17:02] atsu
    Battle Lover Epinard!
[17:05] io
    The More Roaring Prince!
[17:08] io
    Battle Lover Sulfur!
[17:10] ryuu
    The More Thrilling Prince!
[17:13] ryuu
    Battle Lover Vesta!
[17:15] kusa
    The Golden Chevalier,
    shining in greater radiance!
[17:19] kusa
    Aurite!
[17:21] ari
    The Silver Chevalier,
    rustling even more young leaves!
[17:23] ari
    Argent!
[17:25] gero
    The Pearl Chevalier,
    making all the flowers bloom!
[17:28] gero
    Perlite!
[17:30] yumoto
    We are the heirs to the throne of love!
[17:32] five
    More Battle Lovers!
[17:35] hire
    "More Better"? Don't make me laugh!
[17:37] hire
    You're worse than before!
[17:40] en
    It's true that it's a strange name...
[17:41] wom
    The name is just ornamental!
[17:43] wom
    Why can't they understand that?
[17:45] yumoto
    That's right! What really matters is love!
[17:48] en
    Freedom!
[17:49] atsu
    Friendship!
[17:50] io
    Money!
[17:51] ryuu
    Girls!
[17:52] gero
    Beauty, right?
[17:54] ari
    I'm not sure.
[17:55] kusa
    For Binan High School to
    remain Binan High School!
[17:59] yumoto
    Let's go!
[18:01] hire
    Let's turn the tables on them!
[18:02] zun
    Roger that!
[18:18] hire
    All of you together isn't enough!
[18:21] hire
    Yes, yes? S-Station director?
[18:24] hire
    Huh? What? Of course not.
[18:26] hire
    The development may be a bit forced,
    but we got the proper go-ahead for it.
[18:30] hire
    What? R-Right now?
    You can't cancel us that suddenly!
[18:34] hire
    Director! Um, D-Director?
[18:37] hire
    What about that night on Gotanda Planet?!
[18:42] hire
    Damn it! In that case,
    I'll crush you all together!
[18:46] hire
    Fire! Fire! Keep firing!
[18:48] zun
    But I'm afraid we've fired all our ammo, sir.
[18:53] hire
    Ergh!
[18:55] yumoto
    I'll tell you why you were canceled!
[18:59] hire
    What?
[19:00] yumoto
    Because you have no love
    for your subject matter!
[19:03] yumoto
    Those who have no love
    cannot move the hearts of others!
[19:08] yumoto
    More Better Love...
[19:12] yumoto
    Attack!
[19:23] yumoto
    Love is... seriously... over!
[19:30] wom
    And so, Can I Destroy the
    Earth? Returns was canceled.
[19:35] hire
    I swear to only produce high
    quality programming from now on!
[19:40] zun
    Ditto.
[19:54] wom
    The culture festival proceeded without incident,
[19:57] wom
    and their Cosplay Hero Curry sold out.
SIGN    Sold Out
[20:07] yumoto
    Big bro, I'm getting in first, okay?
[20:11] gora
    Yes. Today's bath is in good condition.
[20:14] yumoto
    Yeah!
[20:16] yumoto
    Yo!
[20:18] all
    Yo!
[20:20] en
    Yumoto.
[20:22] en
    Did you know that nikujaga and stew
    are brothers from different mothers?
[20:27] kusa
    Naturally, stew is superior.
[20:30] atsu
    We're not talking about superior or inferior.
[20:32] gero
    But nikujaga's rather homely, isn't it?
[20:35] io
    No, the broad-mindedness of nikujaga,
[20:38] io
    that you can make it with beef
    or pork, is a thing to be admired.
[20:41] ari
    Either way,
[20:42] ari
    it's still sad when you get the wrong
    type of potatoes and they melt.
[20:46] ryuu
    Even if it gets mushy, I forgive them
    if they say "sorry" in a cute way.
[20:52] ---
    Huh?
[20:53] en
    The point is, when you use
    the "mother" known as soy sauce
[20:55] en
    instead of demi-glace sauce,
    you give birth to nikujaga.
[20:58] yumoto
    Oh!
[20:59] yumoto
    Nikujaga, huh?
[21:01] yumoto
    I wish I could have fed some to Wom-san.
[21:06] atsu
    That's true.
[21:08] wom
    Excuse me... Don't treat me
    like I'm dead just yet.
[21:12] en
    Oh, sorry.
[21:14] en
    But at this point in the story, you would
    usually have gone back to your home planet.
[21:17] wom
    I can't go back to space until
    Mr. Tawarayama is revived.
[21:21] atsu
    Huh? What about your scientifically
    advanced medical mechanisms?
[21:24] kusa
    That's likely just an excuse.
[21:27] ---
    Gulp...
[21:28] yumoto
    Well, that just means I can cuddle you more!
[21:30] wom
    W-Wait! No, no, no.
[21:32] yumoto
    There, there, there.
[21:32] wom
    Well, I wouldn't say...
[21:34] yumoto
    Cuddle, cuddle.
[21:36] wom
    ...that!
SIGN    Important news after the break
SIGN    <Important News> After this, Mr. Tawarayama was brought back to life thanks to the "life" brought to Earth by one of Wombat's people. Thank goodness.