E3 - Kill the Suspicious Person! \ Middle School Diary \ Don't Feed the Cute Girls \ Fifteen Years in Solitude Source: Crunchyroll Translator: Editor: Timer: QC: (Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.) [00:03] Nat     Parasaurolophus was a dinosaur that thrived [00:06] Nat     on what is now the North American     continent during the Cretaceous period. [00:11] Nat     They say it could grow to ten meters in height, [00:14] Nat     and its weight exceeded four tons. [00:16] Nat     It had a uniquely-shaped crest that     extended backwards from its head. [00:21] Nat     The crest contained tubes that     connected to its nostrils, [00:25] Nat     which, it is said, produced a     sound similar to an oboe. [00:29] Aza     Today's point of interest! [02:01] Sak     I hate my weakness... [02:04] Sak     I want... [02:06] Sak     I want power! [02:09] Sak     It won't open! [02:11] Nat     You make a mountain out     of every molehill, don't you? SIGN    Kill the Suspicious Person! SIGN    Kill the Suspicious Person! SIGN    Record 8 [02:28] Bot     Here. It's open. [02:30] Sak     Oh! Thank you, Botan-chan! [02:35] Sak     Yes! Carbonated drinks! Yes! [02:38] Sak     Well, she doesn't usually     get to make use of it, [02:40] Sak     but it's a big help at times like this, huh? [02:42] Sak     Botan-chan's "super-strong" setting! [02:44] Nat     Don't call it my "setting." [02:46] Nat     Well, if you really feel like      you never get to use it, [02:48] Nat     you should teach us some simple     self-defense techniques! [02:52] Kar     I want to learn some techniques, too! [02:54] Cla     Good idea. [02:55] Cla     You're cute, so it'd be a     good thing for you to know. [02:59] Nat     Something bothers me about     the way you said that... [03:03] Bot     Right! [03:04] Bot     Then, I'll teach you the     secrets of Hagitsuki-ryuu! [03:07] Nat     That's not necessary. [03:08] Bot     Okay, Sakura, can you be my opponent? [03:11] Sak     Leave it to me! [03:14] Sak     I happened to bring my     "Suspicious Person Kit" today. [03:16] Nat     Why?! [03:18] Sak     Well? [03:18] Sak     Do I look like a suspicious person? [03:21] Cla     Yes, you're totally suspicious. [03:23] Bot     A level of suspicious we rarely     see in this day and age. [03:25] Nat     I'd report you to the police. [03:27] Kar     You'd even make children cry! [03:32] Nat     Why are you sulking? [03:34] Nat     You're a real pain. SIGN    Boom [03:37] Bot     Okay, Sakura! [03:39] Bot     Attack me however you like! SIGN    Curry [03:42] Sak     I'm going to send you joke faxes! [03:46] Nat     Why is she attacking with     psychological warfare? [03:50] Sak     I'll put fermented soy     beans in your mailbox. [03:52] Nat     These are all really underhanded attacks! [03:55] Sak     Okay, I'll put socks I wore     for two weeks straight [03:58] Sak     over the summer in your mailbox. [03:59] Nat     That's the same approach! [04:00] Bot     Enough. Just attack me directly. [04:03] Bot     If you don't, I can't use any     self-defense techniques. [04:05] Sak     Okay, then! [04:06] Sak     I'm gonna lick the back of your knees! [04:10] Sak     Oh no! [04:11] Sak     I can't lick them with this mask in the way! [04:14] Nat     What an idiot. [04:17] Aza     Roll! [04:18] Bot     If you're attacked from the front,     take the attacker's arm like this. [04:23] Bot     In this situation, the pinky finger is key. [04:27] Bot     Keep the pinky, the attacker's     weak point, held down. [04:32] Botan     Then just twist that arm outwards. [04:36] Botan     Of course, I won't do that     now, since it's dangerous. [04:38] Sak     Wow... And then I wouldn't be able to move? [04:41] Bot     Nope. You'd burst. [04:48] Man     Hidebu! SIGN    Censored [04:51] Nat     We can't use that. [04:54] Kar     Botan-senpai. [04:56] Kar     What do you mean by "burst"? [04:58] Botan     Well, you see... SIGN    Middle School Diary SIGN    Record 9 Middle School Diary     (Black Diary) [05:04] Cla     Hello. [05:05] Cla     It's me. [05:07] Cla     Yes, it's... [05:09] Cla     the usual. [05:10] Nat     The usual? [05:15] Nat     Is that... SIGN    Rewind SIGN    Rewind SIGN    Rewind SIGN    Rewind SIGN    Rewind SIGN    Rewind SIGN    Pause SIGN    Play [05:29] Cla     Yes. Please take care of it. [05:31] Nat     She did that right at the beginning. [05:32] Cla     No, it's not as bad as last time.     You shouldn't need the marble block. [05:37] Nat     Ah... the usual, huh? [05:43] Kar     She defeated the suspicious person! [05:45] Kar     Botan-senpai sure is strong. [05:48] Kar     I want to be just like Botan-senpai! [05:51] Cla     You can't. [05:52] Kar     Huh? [05:53] Cla     You mustn't become like Botan-san. [05:56] Kar     O-Okay... [06:00] Cla     You absolutely mustn't. [06:02] Nat     Don't worry. [06:03] Nat     I'm sure she won't. [06:05] Bot     It's true that I'm strong. [06:08] Bot     It takes no effort for me to make a     normal person burst at the seams. [06:12] Bot     But that is not where true strength lies. [06:18] Bot     The true strength that people seek [06:21] Bot     lies not in the body, but in the mind. [06:24] Kar     What do you mean by "burst"? [06:27] Sak     So you undergo mental     training too, Botan-chan? [06:32] Bot     Yes. [06:34] Bot     For instance... [06:37] Bot     I am unfazed when someone reads     my diary from middle school! [06:41] Sak     Wh-What? [06:43] Sak     Impossible! [06:44] Sak     Middle school diaries are full of     immature urges, reckless ignorance, [06:49] Sak     unrealistic ideals, bitter love stories... [06:51] Sak     It all comes together in a     Pandora's Box of chaos! SIGN    Pandora's Box [06:55] Sak     They say that, the day a stranger opens it, [06:57] Sak     even a seasoned master will writhe in agony [07:00] Sak     and suffer a mental breakdown! [07:03] Nat     Where do they say that? [07:06] Cla     Th-That's true... [07:08] Cla     Even for a practitioner of      the peerless Hagitsuki-ryuu, [07:11] Cla     such a claim is hard to fathom... [07:13] Nat     Why are you trembling? [07:15] Bot     Incidentally, I have it here. [07:17] Nat     You carry it around with you?! SIGN    Diary, Age 14 [07:19] Sak     Th-This is... [07:22] Sak     The title even has daggers bookending it! [07:25] Sak     A normal person would faint from the     agony of someone else just seeing that! [07:30] Nat     You can get that symbol     just by typing in "Dagger." SIGN    Dagger [07:37] Nat     By the way... [07:38] Nat     Is this note even necessary? SIGN    Sorry, this diary     is Japanese only. [07:41] Nat     Is it an old personal web page or something? [07:44] Sak     Is it really okay to read this? [07:46] Bot     Yes, it's no problem. [07:57] Nat     Sakura-senpai! [07:59] Nat     What happened?! [08:00] Nat     Was it a forbidden magic spell? [08:02] Sak     P-Parasaurolophus... [08:05] Sak     A Parasaurolophus's horn is stabbing me... [08:08] Nat     She's even rambling incoherently! SIGN    Horn X SIGN    Crest O [08:10] Aza     Bzzt! [08:13] Nat     Just what is written in that diary? [08:21] Nat     I'm... going to read it. [08:25] Nat     I'll read it aloud so you all can hear. [08:33] Nat     Okay. I'll read this part. [08:36] Nat     "July 12th. I am broken glass." [08:42] Nat     "No one will come near me." [08:44] Nat     "Anyone who touches me gets hurt." [08:47] Nat     "And yet..." [08:49] Nat     "When bathed in light,     I will surely glitter." [08:54] Kar     Nat-chan! [08:57] Bot     I'm glass, huh? [09:01] Bot     That's a pretty interesting     metaphor I came up with. [09:05] Bot     "When bathed in light,     I will surely glitter." [09:10] Bot     I guess there was a time     when I believed that... [09:13] Cla     She took no damage from having     that read aloud in front of her? [09:16] Kar     Nat-chan, here's some water. [09:18] Cla     This... This is Hagitsuki-ryuu! [09:22] Bot     After that, I started high school [09:26] Bot     and met a light by the name of Sakura. [09:31] Kar     Botan-senpai really is amazing. [09:35] Kar     She can write things that     affect people this much. [09:41] Kar     Maybe I should keep a diary, too! [09:48] Aza     You shouldn't look directly at the sun. [09:50] Aza     Use special glasses or a solar filter to do so! SIGN    The next total solar eclipse is on June 1st, 2030!! SIGN    Chronicles of the Going Home Club SIGN    Going Home Club Photo Gallery SIGN    Ah, summer. Hydrangeas are the essence of summer. -Botan [10:00] Aza     Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat! SIGN    Now We're in a Battle?! [10:03] Aza     Now we're in a battle! SIGN    Lies [10:05] Cla     Pinching the legs to fire? [10:07] Cla     That takes me back! SIGN    Corpse [10:09] Cla     I used to modify them, too. [10:11] Cla     I tried attaching a long barrel, for instance. [10:15] Cla     I even attached a magazine     made from a plastic bottle, [10:17] Cla     but it jammed so easily. [10:21] Cla     There! [10:23] Cla     Karin-san, say "ah"! [10:24] Kar     Ah! [10:26] Nat/Sak     How much are you going to spoil her?! SIGN    Record 10 SIGN    Don't Feed the Cute Girls [10:34] Cla     How rude! [10:36] Cla     I'm not spoiling her. [10:38] Cla     I was just peeling an orange for her. [10:40] Nat     What high school student     can't peel their own oranges?! [10:43] Cla     But it's dangerous if you get     orange juice in your eyes. [10:45] Kar     My eyes! It hurts! [10:46] Nat     You're just being overprotective! [10:48] Sak     To be honest, Claire-chan, [10:51] Sak     I think you've been spoiling      Karin-chan too much lately. [10:53] Cla     Karin-san, I put more lead in     your mechanical pencil for you. [10:57] Kar     Oh, thank you! [10:59] Sak     That's exactly what I'm talking about! [11:01] Cla     But, if the lead were     to stab her in the eye— [11:04] Nat     It won't! [11:05] Sak     What if you spoil her so much, [11:07] Sak     she becomes the kind of person who     can't do anything for herself? [11:11] Sak     Could you take responsibility [11:13] Sak     for looking after Karin-chan     for the rest of your life? [11:16] Cla     Yes, I could. [11:18] Sak/Nat     You could? [11:21] Cla     It's true. [11:23] Cla     If there is one thing that     could drive me to sin, [11:27] Cla     it would be... [11:30] Cla     Karin-san's cuteness. [11:44] Nat     Enough of that joke already! [11:45] Nat     And don't draw Karin floating in     the sky like someone who's dead! [11:49] Sak     How nice for you, Karin-chan. [11:52] Sak     You've won at life. [11:56] Nat     Oh no! [11:57] Nat     The club president has given up on something! [11:59] Nat     If you give up, Karin is done for! [12:02] Bot     Well, it's true that spoiling someone     all the time won't help them. [12:06] Nat     She just gave good advice!     Her diary is still ridiculous, though. [12:09] Bot     It's a good idea to be strict sometimes. [12:13] Bot     They say even the lion drops     his cub into a valley of carrots. [12:16] Nat     That must be rough for a carnivore. SIGN    Discipline [12:19] Bot     Or maybe it was a valley of discipline... SIGN    Valley of Discipline X SIGN    Deep Abyss O [12:21] ---     Bzzt! [12:23] Nat     I feel bad for the cub! [12:24] Nat     You should discipline it yourself! [12:27] Bot     Okay. [12:28] Bot     Karin, come with me for a moment. [12:30] Kar     Huh? [12:33] Bot     Now, Karin! [12:35] Bot     Climb this stairway with your own two legs! [12:37] Nat     How low are you setting the bar?! [12:39] Kar     No way... [12:40] Kar     I have to climb all these stairs by myself? [12:42] Nat     What? [12:43] Nat     Why are you just going with the flow? [12:46] Kar     But there are at least ten steps... [12:48] Nat     You walked up them at lunch      while humming to yourself! [12:51] Sak     Hey... [12:52] Sak     Botan-chan, this might be a bit much... [12:55] Nat     Not her, too! [12:57] Nat     You can climb a staircase      hopping on one leg! [12:59] Cla     Wait a minute. [13:00] Cla     I'll call my bodyguard. [13:02] Cla     He'll climb it for you. [13:03] Nat     You're missing the point completely! [13:06] Cla     Then, I'll call a helicopter... [13:07] Nat     How high are you planning on taking her?! [13:09] Bot     If you can't walk up, you may     climb on your hands and knees. [13:12] Nat     She gave up on making her     use her own two legs! [13:32] Bot     I see. [13:33] Bot     Very well. [13:56] Bot     All you have to do is hold on to me. [14:02] Kar     Botan-senpai... [14:11] Kar     What do you mean by "burst"? SIGN    Give the seals some love, too! [14:20] Aza     Give the seals some love, too! [14:42] Bot     7:30, huh? [14:45] Bot     Waking up early on a Sunday     makes me feel like I'm losing out. [15:01] Bot     Right. [15:02] Bot     I'll do some warm-up exercises. [15:27] Bot     I guess it's lunchtime. SIGN    White Seal Ramen SIGN    Andou Natsuki-san's Pictures SIGN    Fried Rice SIGN    Fried rice?! [15:48] Botan     Even in the pictures she uploads herself, [15:50] Botan     she includes retorts. [15:51] Botan     She's so dedicated. SIGN    Like!? SIGN    Touno     Karin-san's     Pictures SIGN    Napping in the sun SIGN    Napping in the sun. He looks comfy. SIGN    Like!? SIGN    Time for lunch! [15:58] Bot     Karin's Feminine Appeal level is as high as ever. SIGN    Like!? SIGN    I made cookies! SIGN    Like!? [16:04] Bot     There. [16:05] Bot     I've finished "liking" all the pictures that [16:07] Bot     my cute underclassman friends have uploaded. SIGN    Doumyouji     Sakura-san's     Pictures SIGN    This snail     forgot      his shell!!     What a     scatterbrain!! [16:10] Bot     Sakura... is uploading     nonsensical pictures again. [16:14] Bot     I wish there was a "Die" button     next to the "Like" button. SIGN    Like [16:18] Bot     Huh? SIGN    Nishi Tamao-san SIGN    Kakio Arare-san [16:20] Bot     I think this girl was in my third     year class in middle school. [16:25] Bot     It's been a while... [16:27] Bot     I wonder how she's doing. SIGN    Kakio Arare-san's pictures SIGN    Went to my middle school class reunion! SIGN    Went to my middle school class reunion!     Even the teachers came, it was so fun!     We went for karaoke after (lol) SIGN    Likes!?: 26 [16:36] Bot     Whew! [16:37] Bot     Thank goodness! [16:39] Bot     It's a good thing I've done mental training! [16:41] Bot     A normal person would've had a mental     breakdown and died from seeing that. SIGN    Record 11 SIGN    Fifteen Years in Solitude [16:47] Bot     ...and that's what happened yesterday. [16:49] Bot     Wow, it's been so long since     I broke a punching bag! [16:54] Nat     Botan-senpai, you didn't have any friends     in your third year middle school class? [16:59] Bot     Not just in my third year. [17:00] Bot     Sakura is the first person I've     ever been able to call a friend. SIGN    Friend #1 [17:06] Nat     You've walked a seriously lonely road... [17:09] Kar     What?! [17:09] Kar     But why?! [17:11] Kar     Botan-senpai is so nice! [17:14] Sak     I don't think it was that they didn't like her... [17:16] Sak     They were just afraid of her. [17:19] Sak     Botan-chan unconsciously exudes     a murderous aura, after all. [17:23] Sak     Normal people sense it instinctively     and keep their distance. [17:27] Kar     But I've never thought of     Botan-senpai as scary even once. [17:32] Sak     That's because she was already     with us when you met her! [17:36] Sak     When she's like this,     you don't have to be afraid. [17:41] Sak     If you'd met her in a situation like this, [17:43] Sak     she might have made a different impression. [17:46] Kar     I think I understand... [17:49] Kar     But then, Sakura-senpai, [17:51] Kar     how did you get to be     friends with Botan-senpai? [17:54] Sak     What? [17:57] (Flashback) Bot     After that, I started high school [18:01] (Flashback) Bot     and met a light by the name of Sakura. [18:07] Nat     What on earth happened in their past? [18:11] Bot     Before I met Sakura, [18:13] Bot     I had spent my whole life alone. [18:16] Bot     But that had its positives, too. [18:20] Bot     Hagitsuki-ryuu is closely     tied to your mental strength. [18:25] Bot     So the loneliness made my body stronger. [18:30] Bot     Thanks to my training, [18:31] Bot     when we were told to     pair up in gym class, [18:34] Bot     I got through it using afterimages     made by high-speed motion. [18:38] Nat     You wouldn't have needed to     do that if you had friends... [18:42] Bot     If any of you ever seriously tried to hit me, [18:45] Bot     I don't think it would even hurt me. [18:47] Sak     Huh? [18:49] Sak     That can't be true! [18:51] Sak     Because... See? [18:53] Sak     Your cheeks are as soft as anyone else's! [18:56] Sak     Poke, poke! [18:57] Botan     Well then, why don't you try, Sakura? [19:00] Botan     Get serious. [19:02] Sak     You asked for it! [19:05] Sak     Don't you dare... [19:08] Sak     regret saying that now! [19:10] Nat     Why do you look happier after every hit? [19:13] Sak     D-Damn! [19:16] Sak     It's really not affecting her! [19:17] Sak     Well, [19:18] Sak     that last hit would've done some     damage, so I'm glad it didn't! [19:21] Sak     But why?! SIGN    Why?! [19:23] Bot     If you hit a diamond with a feather, [19:26] Bot     do you think it would hurt it? [19:28] Nat     Didn't you say you were glass? [19:31] Sak     I hate my weakness... [19:34] Sak     I want... [19:36] Sak     I want power! [19:38] Nat     Stop reusing footage to fill up airtime. [19:41] Sak     Oh! [19:42] Sak     Wait. [19:44] Sak     She said that Hagitsuki-ryuu was     closely tied to your mental strength. [19:49] Sak     Which means... [19:53] Sak     Karin-chan, come here a minute! [19:55] Kar     Yes? [19:58] Kar     What? [19:59] Kar     But that would... [20:01] Sak     It's fine. Just do it like I told you. [20:03] Bot     Hey, now. [20:04] Bot     Karin may have a high Feminine Appeal level, [20:06] Bot     but it won't make her hit harder. [20:10] Sak     We'll see about that. [20:12] Nat     Doumyouji Sakura... [20:15] Nat     She's hit on a truly terrifying idea. [20:18] Nat     At this rate, Botan-senpai     won't stand a chance! [20:21] Kar     I don't really understand,     but I'll give it a try. [20:24] Sak     Go for it! [20:25] Sak     Give it your best shot! [20:29] Bot     Whenever you're ready. [20:32] Kar     Botan-senpai... [20:34] Kar     I hate you! [20:38] Kar     Botan-senpai, I hate you! [20:41] Kar     I hate you! [20:42] Kar     I hate you! [20:48] Cla     I'm sorry I'm late. [20:54] Cla     What's going on, everyone? SIGN    Touno Karin-san's Pictures SIGN    I really love you, Botan-senpai!! SIGN    Like!? SIGN    Ball Game Tournament Boys: Basket, Dodge Girls: Volley, Soft Confirm Your Match Times SIGN    Preview [22:46] Bot     This is Botan. [22:47] Bot     The sand tiger shark has to eat [22:49] Bot     its siblings in the mother's     womb in order to be born. [22:52] Bot     The battle starts before it's even born! [22:55] Bot     Next time, Record 12: Fierce Battle!     The First Term Ball Game Tournament. [22:58] Bot     And two more!