# E1 - Witches Blow a New Pipe
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/watch/G68M22G46/witches-blow-a-new-pipe)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:14] Ninny**
*Fairy tales are such bullshit.*
**[00:20] Ninny**
* It's always some girl getting a spell cast*
* on her that turns her into a princess,*
**[00:23] ninny**
*getting to wear a pretty dress,*
**[00:25] Ninny**
* pretending to choose some hot guy*
* and being chosen herself...*
**[00:28] Ninny**
* Not to mention, the spell randomly*
* breaks in the middle of it all. Lame, right?*
**[00:30] Paparazzi A**
Here she comes!
**[00:31] Papapazzi**
It's Ninny!
**[00:33] ---**
Hi, Ninny!
**[00:33] Ninny**
* Yet, for some reason,*
* every girl wants to be a princess.*
**[00:34] Paparazzi A**
Nice hoodie!
**[00:36] Paparazzi A**
Is it true you broke up with TJ?
**[00:36] Ninny**
* Like, are you serious?*
* The spell just breaks randomly.*
**[00:38] Paparazzi B**
We haven't seen you together for a while.
**[00:40] Paparazzi C**
Did you find someone new?
**[00:41] Ninny**
* It was inevitable because*
* you broke your promise?*
**[00:43] Paparazzi D**
Just give us a little something.
**[00:43] Ninny**
*Or time ran out, so what can you do?*
**[00:44] Paparazzi D**
I heard someone left the group.
**[00:46] Ninny**
*But you* can *do something.*
**[00:48] Paparazzi C**
What do you think about losing a member?
**[00:49] Ninny**
*You're all fools.*
**[00:50] Paparazzi E**
You didn't get along with Macy, did you?
**[00:51] Ninny**
* None of you know the real*
* reason the spell breaks.*
**[00:52] Paparazzi E**
Was it always like that?
**[00:53] Paparazzi B**
Is that the reason?
**[00:56] Ninny**
So irritating.
**[00:58] Paparazzi A**
Huh?
**[01:04] Paparazzi A**
Hey, wait! Ninny!
**[01:05] Paparazzi B**
What the hell was that insane flash?
**[01:21] Paparazzi**
She went in there!
**[01:25] Paparazzi A**
Huh?
**[01:28] Paparazzi B**
She disappeared...
**[01:30] Ninny**
*If magic only works on fools,*
**[01:34] Ninny**
*I'd rather be the one casting the spell.*
**[01:44] Noel**
The tip of my finger, the edge of my voice.
**[01:47] Noel**
Revenger Joe's Iron Key.
**[01:49] Noel**
Five locks, three chains, silence-sheathed.
**[01:52] Noel**
A blast from the pipe to blind.
**[02:02] Noel**
Please don't use magic!
**[02:03] Noel**
Your magic will make your antlers... bloom...
**[02:11] Noel**
Blue Spark!
**[02:22] Ninny**
Magic Number 44: Flash Bumper!
**[02:31] Ninny**
That was a close one.
**[02:32] Ninny**
That's a bud buck, y'know.
**[02:35] Ninny**
That's an A-rank harvest.
**[02:37] Ninny**
What were you gonna do
if I didn't make it in time?
**[02:41] Noel**
I don't want to hear that from someone
who shows up so appallingly late,
**[02:45] Noel**
Ninny.
**[02:48] Ninny**
I told you to stop calling me by my
first name! I have seniority here,
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** WB
***SIGN*** WB
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** Ninny
Spangcole
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
***SIGN*** WB 2nd Umbrella / Idol
**[02:52] Ninny**
Niiha!
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Noel**
If you start calling me "Noel,"
I'll consider it, Ninny.
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
Noel
Niihashi
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:55] Sign**
WB 1st Umbrella / Student
**[02:59] Ninny**
Where do you get off casually making
demands of your seniors like that?
**[03:04] Nar**
*Dragons: mythical creatures.*
**[03:09] Nar**
* But in truth, they are neither*
* mythical nor creatures.*
**[03:14] Nar**
* Since time immemorial,*
* 72% of all deaths in London*
**[03:20] Nar**
* have been caused by grotesque*
* beings known as dragons.*
**[03:24] Nar**
* That is why they are so prominently*
* displayed on London's coat of arms.*
**[03:31] Nar**
* Rampaging dragons cause*
* great harm to humans.*
**[03:35] Nar**
* In order to prevent that,*
* the dragons must be monitored.*
**[03:40] Nar**
* The citizens of Front London*
* cannot see the dragons.*
**[03:46] Nar**
*But there's also a Reverse London.*
**[03:51] Nar**
* Only those who live on the reverse*
* side of London can see the dragons.*
**[03:56] Sign**
Reverse London Natural Dragon Management Agency
**[03:56] Sign**
Reverse London Natural Dragon Management Agency
**[03:56] Sign**
Reverse London Natural Dragon Management Agency
**[03:57] Nar**
* It inevitably fell to the people of Reverse*
* London to take care of and manage the dragons.*
**[04:03] Sign**
Wing Bind Headquarters Building
**[04:03] Sign**
Wing Bind Headquarters Building
**[04:03] Sign**
Wing Bind Headquarters Building
**[04:06] Ninny**
What the heck?!
**[04:07] Ninny**
You guys still haven't fixed this from
when that big guy wrecked it? Pathetic!
**[04:12] Guy**
S-Sorry...
**[04:15] Guy**
We were asked to get the monitor up first.
**[04:19] Ninny**
And you! Why did you take on
a two-person job by yourself?
**[04:23] Noel**
Because you were late, Ninny.
**[04:25] Ninny**
Most people would just wait!
**[04:29] Noel**
If I took care of it on my own,
I'd get the reward all to myself.
**[04:33] Ninny**
I knew it!
**[04:34] Ninny**
So that's what you're after.
**[04:36] Noel**
You make plenty at your job in Front London,
**[04:40] Noel**
so just exchange as much as you want.
**[04:43] Ninny**
I have *some* pride, you know!
**[04:46] Ninny**
And quit saying stuff like that.
**[04:49] Noel**
Huh?
**[04:51] Noel**
I lost achievement points.
**[04:54] Noel**
But I plucked all the flowers that
bloomed so they wouldn't find out.
**[04:57] Ninny**
Yes! I got points!
**[05:00] Noel**
But why?
**[05:02] Ninny**
Because of my assist at the end, duh.
**[05:06] Ninny**
That's the only reason our
payload made it out safe.
**[05:09] Guy**
So cute.
**[05:11] Guy**
Cut it out.
**[05:12] Guy**
They'll be pissed if they catch
you sneaking photos again.
**[05:15] Ninny**
Hey, wait a minute!
**[05:17] Ninny**
Why are you plucking flowers
off of bud bucks, anyway?!
**[05:20] Noel**
Well, what was I supposed to do?
**[05:23] Noel**
They go down in price if their
flowers bloom before they're sold.
**[05:27] Noel**
I did it for our client.
**[05:30] Noel**
See? Isn't it pretty?
**[05:32] Noel**
You can touch it if you like.
**[05:35] Noel**
You can't have it, though.
**[05:36] Ninny**
A-As if I'd want it!
**[05:38] Osushi**
Let me see your panties!
**[05:42] Osushi**
Let me see your panties!
**[05:45] Balgo**
Hey! Osushi!
**[05:49] Guy**
What's that thing?
**[05:50] Guy**
Is it a dark dragon?
**[05:52] Guy**
In the middle of the city?
**[05:54] Guy**
No...
**[05:55] Guy**
It's just Balgo.
**[05:56] Guy**
Damn it. Not him again.
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Balgo
Parks
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:57] Sign**
Human / Dragonclad
**[05:59] Balgo**
Osushi! Calm down!
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Dragon Canine
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:01] Sign**
Osushi
**[06:04] Balgo**
You're a cutie! You're absolutely
adorable, so please, calm down!
**[06:11] Ninny**
Hey, it's Balgo and Osushi.
**[06:13] Noel**
Indeed it is.
**[06:15] Ninny**
So do something about them.
You're in charge of them, aren't you?
**[06:19] Noel**
*We're* in charge of them.
**[06:22] Ninny**
He's your senior at school, isn't he?
**[06:25] Noel**
I mean, it's probably fine.
**[06:28] Noel**
Look. He's all smiles.
Why don't we have some tea?
**[06:33] Ninny**
I want a caffè latte.
**[06:34] Noel**
I'll be glad to push the button,
but you have to put the money in.
**[06:38] Chief**
There's nothing "fine" about this!
**[06:41] Chief**
At this rate, Balgo's going to die!
**[06:44] Chief**
We've been tasked with keeping an eye
on him, so I need you two to do your jobs!
**[06:50] Ninny**
Getting us to keep tabs on dragonclads
**[06:52] Ninny**
is basically HQ's way of making
this nonsense our problem.
**[06:58] Ninny**
It's not like we get paid
or earn achievement points
**[07:02] Ninny**
for keeping him out of trouble 24/7
**[07:04] Ninny**
while we're on the job.
**[07:07] Chief**
So we're back to that.
**[07:09] Chief**
I figured you might say that...
**[07:12] Chief**
So I talked to some of the higher-ups
**[07:14] Chief**
and got you girls some extra money
and achievement points for this.
**[07:19] Ninny**
Say what?!
**[07:22] Ninny**
All right, fine. Let's do this!
**[07:26] Ninny**
Let's go, Niiha!
**[07:28] Ninny**
You're doing this for the money.
**[07:30] Ninny**
I'm doing it for merit.
**[07:32] Ninny**
But just so we don't sound completely
awful, we're doing it for society!
**[07:40] Chief**
Could you maybe shout the
"doing it for society" part first?
**[07:51] Guy**
What the...
**[07:52] Balgo**
Osushi!
**[07:56] Lady**
Well, if you say so, Daddy...
**[08:00] Balgo**
You're such a good doggie, Osushi!
**[08:04] Random lady**
It sure is noisy over there.
**[08:07] Jimmy**
Yeah. Maybe there's a dragon on the loose.
**[08:11] Random lady**
Don't even joke about that.
Make sure it's spick and span up there.
**[08:15] Jimmy**
Yes, ma'am.
**[08:19] Balgo**
Wait!
**[08:24] Jimmy**
Balgo, you idiot!
**[08:27] Jimmy**
Don't come over here!
**[08:33] Random lady**
Goodness, that chimney
sweep's really going at it.
**[08:37] Balgo**
Sorry! I'm really sorry!
**[08:40] Balgo**
Are you hurt?
**[08:44] Jimmy**
You moron!
**[08:45] Jimmy**
I'm not hurt!
**[08:47] Jimmy**
I just don't wanna get arrested for
violating the dragon contact law!
**[08:52] Jimmy**
Wing Bind HQ is right over there!
**[09:03] Balgo**
Noel!
**[09:05] Balgo**
You saved me!
**[09:07] Ninny**
I'm the one who saved you, you dumbass.
**[09:10] Noel**
There, there. Please calm down, Osushi.
**[09:18] Noel**
Osushi's calm now.
**[09:20] Ninny**
What did you do to the poor thing, anyway?
**[09:23] Balgo**
Nothing. I was just taking Osushi for a walk.
**[09:26] Jimmy**
Uh... Thank you, witches.
**[09:30] Jimmy**
So, um... about that chimney...
**[09:34] Noel**
Your dragon insurance should cover it.
**[09:38] Noel**
More importantly...
**[09:39] Noel**
Did you come into contact with the dragon?
**[09:42] Jimmy**
N-No! Not at all!
**[09:45] Ninny**
Niiha, run the test.
**[09:47] Noel**
Right.
**[09:50] Noel**
Please lick this.
**[09:52] Balgo**
Um... What happens if
someone touches a dragon?
**[09:58] Noel**
For the protection of both
dragons and humans,
**[10:01] Noel**
the Dragon Contact Prohibition
Law was passed in 1609.
**[10:06] Noel**
Violators face 100 years in prison.
**[10:08] Noel**
Or...
**[10:11] Ninny**
They get executed.
**[10:12] Balgo**
What?
**[10:16] Noel**
It's within the normal range.
**[10:18] ---**
Huh.
**[10:21] Balgo**
Thank goodness!
**[10:23] Ninny**
This is all your fault!
**[10:24] Balgo**
I'm sorry!
**[10:26] Ninny**
Who do you think... caused...
this mess... in the first place... huh?!
**[10:27] Ninny**
Who do you think... caused...
this mess... in the first place... huh?!
**[10:28] Balgo**
Ow!
**[10:28] Ninny**
Who do you think... caused...
this mess... in the first place... huh?!
**[10:30] Ninny**
Who do you think... caused...
this mess... in the first place... huh?!
**[10:30] Balgo**
Ouch!
**[10:31] Ninny**
Who do you think... caused...
this mess... in the first place... huh?!
**[10:32] Ninny**
Also, why don't you put a muzzle
on Osushi when you go out?!
**[10:36] Ninny**
You're the only civilian who can
touch Osushi and not get locked up,
**[10:39] Ninny**
because you're a dragonclad!
**[10:41] Ninny**
Do you realize that?!
**[10:44] Balgo**
But I did put one on!
**[10:45] Balgo**
It just got ripped off when Osushi suddenly
sprouted wings while we were walking!
**[10:51] Noel**
Did Osushi really grow wings
without anything triggering it?
**[10:54] Balgo**
Y-Yes!
**[10:56] Noel**
Where did it happen?
**[10:58] Balgo**
Huh? Where?
**[11:01] Noel**
Please try to remember.
**[11:04] Noel**
Osushi's wings usually appear
**[11:07] Noel**
when you try to bark like Osushi,
**[11:11] Noel**
or when you sneeze,
**[11:13] Noel**
or when you start cracking up...
**[11:16] Ninny**
So all the time, then.
**[11:18] Noel**
Or...
**[11:20] Noel**
when you're in danger, Balgo.
**[11:31] Noel**
It would appear that, as a dragonclad,
**[11:33] Noel**
you aggressively attract
dragons toward you.
**[11:37] Noel**
For now, I need you to take Osushi and get
somewhere where there aren't many people.
**[11:43] Noel**
Ninny, the barrier tape.
**[11:45] Ninny**
On it!
**[11:50] Ninny**
So what now?
**[11:54] Noel**
Magic Number 04: Stun Ball.
**[12:07] Ninny**
Wait! What was the point of the barrier tape?!
**[12:10] Noel**
Just in case.
**[12:12] Noel**
Oh, Chief.
**[12:13] Noel**
We've subdued a dragon,
so if we could get a bonus...
**[12:18] Ninny**
Dragon insurance!
**[12:22] Noel**
No, that's not our fault.
**[12:27] Noel**
Please stop whining. It's quite pathetic.
**[12:29] Chief**
*So you don't know what kind of dragon it is?*
**[12:33] Noel**
Correct.
**[12:35] Noel**
It's the first time I've seen one like it,
so I don't know what kind it is.
**[12:40] Noel**
It was rather worked up,
so I stunned it to shut it up.
**[12:45] Ninny**
Niiha!
**[13:04] Ninny**
It just went lights out.
**[13:12] Ninny**
It's coming!
**[13:14] Ninny**
We need to get it away from here!
**[13:16] Noel**
I know.
**[13:28] Ninny**
All right, this should be good—
**[13:31] Ninny**
Oh, come on. You're making
this really difficult to call in.
**[13:34] Noel**
Ninny, in front of you!
**[13:51] Ninny**
Chief.
**[13:52] Ninny**
Rutherford Street. We need
an emergency dragon blockade.
**[13:56] Ninny**
We've got a dark dragon.
**[14:10] Guy**
What the...
**[14:10] Lady**
What's that sound?
**[14:19] Broadcast**
*This is a notice from BBC Reverse London.*
**[14:24] Broadcast**
*Due to a dark dragon alert,*
**[14:27] Broadcast**
* Rutherford Street is now*
* under a dragon blockade.*
**[14:31] Broadcast**
* Anyone in the vicinity should*
* seek shelter immediately.*
**[14:37] Broadcast**
*Wing Bind has the situation under control.*
**[14:40] Ninny**
You know what always gets me?
**[14:42] Ninny**
Doesn't it just piss you off when they say,
"Wing Bind has the situation under control"?
**[14:47] Noel**
No, because it's our job.
**[14:50] Ninny**
That's not what I mean!
**[14:52] Ninny**
I'd be fine with it if we said it ourselves,
**[14:54] Ninny**
but why's the BBC announcing it?
**[14:58] Noel**
Chief, the dragon blockade is set up,
so it's time we switched out with the Sabres—
**[15:04] Chief**
*Uh, hello? Noel? Hello—*
**[15:07] Noel**
What do you think you're doing?
**[15:10] Ninny**
That's my line. You were really going
to let the Sabres take all the credit?
**[15:18] Ninny**
This is our chance to show
HR how powerful we are.
**[15:23] Noel**
Our duty as Pipers is to take dragons
to pasture and harvest from them.
**[15:27] Noel**
We don't need to be powerful—
**[15:27] Ninny**
Like I said before...
**[15:32] Ninny**
I want to join the Sabres!
**[15:38] Noel**
Well, personally, I don't.
**[15:54] Ninny**
I hit it.
**[15:56] Ninny**
Whoa...
**[15:58] Ninny**
Magic Number 28: Rainy Wheel!
**[16:13] Balgo**
Help...
**[16:17] Noel**
Balgo.
**[16:23] Noel**
Leave this to me.
**[16:27] Noel**
Magic Number 75: Gatling Crown!
**[16:37] Bruno**
Hey. This is a huge deal.
**[16:40] Sign**
Wing Bind Supreme Powers That Be
**[16:40] Sign**
Wing Bind Supreme Powers That Be
**[16:40] Sign**
Top of Horns
**[16:41] Bruno**
How many years has it been?
**[16:42] Bruno**
It's been a century!
**[16:43] Roy**
Ninety-six years, to be precise.
**[16:46] Bruno**
That's basically a century!
**[16:49] Bruno**
A whole century since the last time we let
a dark dragon get into Reverse London!
**[16:55] Bruno**
If this isn't a catastrophe, what the hell *is*?!
**[16:58] Bruno**
Could you show up for once?!
**[17:01] Bruno**
Stop chewing gum!
**[17:03] Bruno**
You guys seriously have nothin' to say?
**[17:06] Bruno**
Am I the only one upset here? Huh?!
**[17:09] Roy**
I'm pretty sure I spoke.
**[17:13] Bruno**
Anyway, my point is, letting this
Balgo guy run around is the problem.
**[17:21] Bruno**
What do you say, Old Man Wolfy?
**[17:25] Wolfgang**
He has been the topic of countless
discussions within our squad
**[17:30] Wolfgang**
in the month since he became a dragonclad.
**[17:35] Wolfgang**
This situation occurred
due to our own negligence.
**[17:38] Wolfgang**
We cannot simply ignore it.
**[17:43] Wolfgang**
We will proceed with the plan to eliminate
the dragonclad known as Balgo Parks.