E228 - Tsurukou's Travels (Fake)

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] All
    Aware! Meisaku-Kun!
SIGN    Aware! Meisaku-Kun
[00:05] Sign
    Episode 228
    Tsurukou's Travels (Fake)
[00:06] Tsurukou
    Finally finished.
[00:07] Meisaku
    Hm? Finished what?
[00:09] Tsurukou
    Behold! Tsurukou's Travels!
[00:09] Sign
    Tsurukou's Travels
[00:12] Meisaku
    "Tsurukou's Travels"?
[00:13] Sign
    Tsurukou's Travels
[00:13] Tsurukou
    Every adventure I had while traveling
    the world on a ship is recorded in here!
[00:16] Sign
    Tsurukou's Travels
[00:18] Meisaku
    Wow, traveling the world on a ship, huh?
[00:21] Meisaku
    Wait, the world?! You went
     on such an epic adventure?!
[00:24] Tsurukou
    I didn't.
[00:25] Meisaku
    You didn't?
[00:26] Tsurukou
    I played in the neighborhood.
[00:27] Meisaku
    Oh, in the neighborhood, huh?
[00:29] Meisaku
    So that book's a big lie.
    It's not a travel book at all.
[00:32] Tsurukou
    It's fine that it's a big lie.
[00:35] Tsurukou
    Don't you know the classic 
    tale of Gulliver's Travels?
[00:36] Sign
    Gulliver's Travels
[00:36] Sign
    Gulliver's Travels
[00:37] Meisaku
    Hm? Of course I do.
[00:39] Sign
    Gulliver's
    Travels
[00:39] Meisaku
    The protagonist, Gulliver,
     writes about his travels
[00:41] Meisaku
    to the lands of giants
     and little people, right?
[00:43] Tsurukou
    Close, but not quite.
[00:45] Tsurukou
    More precisely,
[00:46] Tsurukou
    the protagonist, Gulliver,
    writes about his travels
[00:46] Sign
    Gulliver's
    Travels
[00:48] Tsurukou
    to the lands of giants
     and little people...
[00:50] Tsurukou
    as if he was a real person.
[00:50] Sign
    As if
[00:50] Sign
    As if
[00:52] Meisaku
    Yeah, true. Gulliver's 
    Travels is a fictional story.
[00:57] Tsurukou
    When I learned about this trick,
    here's what I thought:
[01:00] Tsurukou
    "So anything goes, huh?"
[01:01] Meisaku
    Well, I wouldn't say anything...
[01:03] Tsurukou
    So I'll now read aloud from
     this fake travel book I wrote
[01:05] Tsurukou
    without setting foot outside my house.
[01:07] Tsurukou
    Please listen!
[01:08] Meisaku
    Uh, make it nice and short then, okay?
[01:11] Sign
    fad(1,1000)\an7\bord0\shad0\fscx92\blur0.4\fs12\c&H060907&\pos(120,33.334)}One day in February
    
    I sailed out in search of adventure.
    You don't need a reason to be on an 
    adventure.
    All you need to know is that it is 
    out there, waiting for you.
[01:11] Sign
    m 0 0 l 100 0 100 100 0 100
[01:12] Tsurukou
    One day in February, I sailed*
    out in search of adventure.
[01:15] Tsurukou
    You don't need a reason
    to be on an adventure.
[01:17] Tsurukou
    All you need to know is that
    it is out there, waiting for you.
[01:20] Meisaku
    Pretentious coming from someone
    who didn't even leave the house.
[01:23] Tsurukou
    As per usual, I give my crew a pep talk.
[01:24] Sign
    As per usual, I give 
    my crew a pep talk
[01:27] Tsurukou
    Okay, lads! Put your backs into it!
[01:30] Swe/Bol/Nok
    Aye aye, sir!
[01:31] Meisaku
    Oh, Bolt and the others are in it, too.
[01:33] Tsurukou
    Roll call time, lads!
[01:35] Nokio
    My name's Nokio. I'm this ship's cook.
[01:38] Nokio
    My specialty's seasoned rice,
    and my favorite food's seasoned rice!
[01:42] Meisaku
    You suck as a cook.
[01:43] Bolt
    My name's Bolt. I'm in
    charge of powering this ship.
[01:46] Bolt
    Which means I swim behind
     the boat and push it!
[01:49] Meisaku
    Sounds like hard work.
[01:50] Sweets
    My name's Sweets. I'm a stowaway on this ship!
[01:54] Meisaku
    Then he's not part of the crew.
[01:55] Nokio
    My name's Nokio.
[01:57] Nokio
    And now for roll call round two!
[01:59] Meisaku
    One round's enough.
[02:01] Tsurukou
    Listen up, lads! Our first
    destination is the Land of Giants.
[02:03] Sign
    The Land of Giants
[02:03] Sign
    The Land of Giants
[02:05] Meisaku
    Oh, that shows up in Gulliver's Travels, too.
[02:07] Sweets
    Is everything giant in the Land of Giants?
[02:10] Tsurukou
    That's right!
[02:10] Tsurukou
    They sell 2kg apple pies,
[02:10] Sign
    Apple Pies That Weigh 2kg
[02:10] Sign
    Apple Pies That Weigh 2kg
[02:12] Tsurukou
    and blocks of meat so huge,
    a whole family can't finish 'em.
[02:12] Sign
    Blocks of Meat a Family Can't Finish
[02:12] Sign
    Blocks of Meat a Family Can't Finish
[02:15] Meisaku
    Sounds more like a wholesale store.
[02:16] Tsurukou
    Blocks of meat, here we come!
[02:19] Swe/Bol/Nok
    Aye aye, sir!
[02:21] Sign
    m 0 0 l 100 0 100 100 0 100
[02:21] Sign
    One day in February
    
    We finally made landfall 
    in the Land of Giants.
[02:22] Tsurukou
    One day in February, we finally
    made landfall in the Land of Giants.
[02:26] Nokio
    So this is the Land of Giants, huh?
[02:29] Sweets
    Hey, look. There's a giant...
[02:31] Sweets
    pygmy marmoset!
[02:31] Sign
    Pygmy Marmoset
[02:31] Sign
    Pygmy Marmoset
[02:33] Meisaku
    A pygmy marmoset? What's that?
[02:36] Bolt
    It's well over 30cm.
[02:37] Bolt
    Even the wild animals are
    huge in the Land of Giants.
[02:40] Meisaku
    But I don't know how big regular ones are.
[02:42] Nokio
    Look, there's a Barbados
    threadsnake that's about 40cm!
[02:44] Sign
    Barbados Threadsnake
[02:44] Sign
    Barbados Threadsnake
[02:45] Bolt
    That tropical screech owl over
    there is roughly 50cm tall!
[02:47] Sign
    Tropical Screech Owl
[02:47] Sign
    Tropical Screech Owl
[02:48] Meisaku
    But what are their regular sizes?!
[02:51] Sweets
    It's so amazing, Captain!
[02:52] Tsurukou
    Regardless of their sizes,
    there are a lot of rare animals here.
[02:55] Meisaku
    I'm more curious about that, too.
[02:57] Musubi
    I'm from this island,
    so they're not rare to me.
[03:00] Musubi
    But we do have a different
    ecosystem from other islands.
[03:03] Tsurukou
    Is that so, Mr. Guide?
[03:04] Meisaku
    So ginormous! Why aren't you all surprised?!
[03:08] Sign
    m 0 0 l 100 0 100 100 0 100
[03:08] Sign
    One day in February
    
    We arrived in Lilliput, 
    where everything was tiny.
[03:09] Tsurukou
    One day in February, we arrived in
    Lilliput, where everything was tiny.
[03:14] Meisaku
    The same thing happened
     in Gulliver's Travels.
[03:15] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 12 100 100 0 100
[03:15] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 25 100 110 0 100
[03:15] Sign (Red)
    Charcoal BBQ
[03:15] Sign (Yellow)
    Ushigama-ya
[03:16] Bolt
    Everything in this country is small.
[03:18] Nokio
    But how small are they, Captain?
[03:20] Sign
    Humans
[03:20] Sign
    Humans
[03:20] Tsurukou
    The people here are
    about a tenth of our size.
[03:23] Tsurukou
    The cars are about a fifth.
[03:23] Sign
    Cars
[03:23] Sign
    Cars
[03:24] Tsurukou
    Most of the buildings are
    a quarter of the size, but...
[03:24] Sign
    Buildings
[03:24] Sign
    Buildings
[03:26] Tsurukou
    the BBQ restaurants are nearer two-thirds.
[03:26] Sign
    BBQ Restaurants
[03:26] Sign
    BBQ Restaurants
[03:26] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 12 100 104 00 100
[03:26] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 25 100 110 0 100
[03:26] Sign (Red)
    Charcoal BBQ
[03:26] Sign (Yellow)
    Ushigama-ya
[03:28] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 12 100 100 0 100
[03:28] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 25 100 110 0 100
[03:28] Sign (Red)
    Charcoal BBQ
[03:28] Sign (Yellow)
    Ushigama-ya
[03:28] Meisaku
    The balance of the sizes is all off.
[03:30] Sign
    Hoodies
[03:30] Sign
    Hoodies
[03:30] Tsurukou
    Oh, and the hoodies are about
     one ninth the size of ours,
[03:33] Tsurukou
    so hoodies look even
    bigger on people here!
[03:33] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 12 100 100 0 100
[03:33] Sign (Red)
    m 0 0 l 100 25 100 110 0 100
[03:33] Sign (Red)
    Charcoal BBQ
[03:33] Sign (Yellow)
    Ushigama-ya
[03:36] Sweets
    Wearing oversized hoodies
     is totally in, huh?
[03:38] Meisaku
    Like I care.
[03:40] Sign
    m 0 0 l 100 0 100 100 0 100
[03:40] Sign
    One day in February
    
     Would you believe it?
    We arrived at the Flying Island.
[03:41] Tsurukou
    One day in February, would you believe
    it? We arrived at the Flying Island.
[03:46] Meisaku
    A flying island shows up 
    in Gulliver's Travels, too.
[03:49] Nokio
    Here we are on the Flying Island!
[03:52] Sweets
    You mean the island itself is flying?
[03:54] Tsurukou
    Exactly!
[03:55] Tsurukou
    It floats about 25cm above the surface.
[03:57] Meisaku
    I wouldn't call that "flying"!
[04:00] Sign
    Tsurukou's Travels
[04:01] Tsurukou
    So what did you think of Tsurukou's Travels?
[04:04] Meisaku
    Well, it was interesting,
[04:05] Meisaku
    but maybe you should write about facts 
    if you want to call it a travel book?
[04:09] Tsurukou
    Huh?
[04:10] Tsurukou
    But if I have to write about 
    stuff that actually happened,
[04:12] Tsurukou
    all I have is that time I went to that kingdom
     at the bottom of the sea to dig up treasure.
[04:16] Meisaku
    I want to read that!
[04:19] Narrator
    And they all lived happily ever after!
SIGN    Aware! Meisaku-Kun