# 1 - Assassination Time
Source: [Crunchyroll](https://www.crunchyroll.com/series/GRE59JGX6/assassination-classroom)
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
**[00:28] ---**
"Assassination"\n"Class 3-E"\n
**[00:52] ---**
"Roll Book"\n
**[00:53] ---**
Now then...\n
**[00:55] ---**
...let's get started.\n
**[00:57] ---**
Student on duty, on your command.\n
**[00:59] ---**
S-Stand up!\n
**[01:05] ---**
Attention!\n
**[01:10] ---**
Bow!\n
**[01:14] ---**
Good morning.\n
**[01:16] ---**
Fire all you like--I'll just\nbe taking attendance.\n
**[01:20] ---**
Isogai?\n
**[01:21] ---**
Here!\n
**[01:23] ---**
I'm sorry, you'll have to\nspeak up with all this gunfire.\n
**[01:26] ---**
Here!\n
**[01:27] ---**
Okajima?\n
**[01:28] ---**
Here!\n
**[01:29] ---**
Okuda!\n
**[01:30] ---**
Here!\n
**[01:31] ---**
Kataoka?\n
**[01:32] ---**
Here!\n
**[01:32] ---**
Kayano?\n
**[01:33] ---**
Here!\n
**[01:34] ---**
Kanzaki!\n
**[01:35] ---**
Here!\n
**[01:38] ---**
All right.\n
**[01:39] ---**
No tardies. Excellent!\n
**[01:42] ---**
That makes me very happy.\n
**[01:44] ---**
He's too fast.\n
**[01:45] ---**
So the whole class shooting at him doesn't work?\n
**[01:48] ---**
We\n
**[01:50] ---**
are killers.\n
**[01:51] ---**
And our target\n
**[01:54] ---**
is our teacher.\n
**[01:55] ---**
Too bad. Not a single bullet\nhit its mark today, either.\n
**[01:59] ---**
Methods that rely on sheer\nnumbers lack any individual thought.\n
**[02:02] ---**
Line of sight, barrel position,\nfinger movement--\n
**[02:06] ---**
each of these is far too simple.\n
**[02:09] ---**
You've got to be more inventive!\n
**[02:10] ---**
Otherwise...\n
**[02:12] ---**
...you'll never be able to kill me\nat my max speed of Mach 20.\n
**[02:17] ---**
But, like, see...\n
**[02:19] ---**
No way did you seriously dodge all of those!\n
**[02:21] ---**
I mean, these *are* just BB's.
**[02:24] ---**
You coulda just stood there\ngrittin' your teeth as they hit you.\n
**[02:27] ---**
Yeah! That's right!\n
**[02:31] ---**
Gather up the BB's and hand them over.\n
**[02:34] ---**
I told you: these may be harmless to you...\n
**[02:41] ---**
...but they're special anti-me BB's\ndeveloped by the government.\n
**[02:45] ---**
If one hits me, it can slice\nthrough my cells like they were tofu.\n
**[02:49] ---**
Of course, they regenerate a few seconds later.\n
**[02:53] ---**
Then again, *you* could end up shooting your eyes out.
**[02:57] ---**
No shooting in the classroom\nunless you're trying to kill me.\n
**[03:02] ---**
I do hope you *can* kill me--before graduation, that is.
**[03:07] ---**
Now then, let's put away the guns\nand BB's and start on our work.\n
**[03:13] ---**
Class 3-E of Kunugigaoka Junior High School:\nthe assassination classroom.\n
**[03:18] ---**
Another day, another class bell rings.\n
**[04:55] ---**
"Episode 1: Assassination Time"\n
**[05:01] ---**
Now, here's the question:\n
**[05:04] ---**
Isogai!\n
**[05:04] ---**
Y-Yes, sir?\n
**[05:06] ---**
Which of these four tentacles\nis not like the others?\n
**[05:09] ---**
Um... the blue one?\n
**[05:11] ---**
Correct! Only the "who" in the\nblue sentence is a relative pronoun.\n
**[05:16] ---**
--A relative pronoun qualifies\nthe noun right before it, so here,\n
**[05:17] ---**
--Hey, Nagisa.\n--A relative pronoun qualifies the noun right before it, so here,\n
**[05:19] ---**
--A relative pronoun qualifies the noun right before it, so here,\n
**[05:20] ---**
--"who is standing over there" is describing "boy" over here.\n
**[05:21] ---**
--The crescent moon's out, even though it's daytime.\n--"who is standing over there" is describing "boy" over here.\n
**[05:26] ---**
How did we end up like this?\n
**[05:30] ---**
Two things happened at\nonce as our third year began.\n
**[05:50] ---**
The first was the moon\nsuddenly exploding into a crescent.\n
**[05:58] ---**
"Breaking"\n"NASA Reporting: Most of Moon Missing?"\n
**[06:00] ---**
We interrupt this program\nto bring you breaking news.\n
**[06:03] ---**
We've just gotten word that\nabout 70 percent of the moon\n
**[06:06] ---**
has been vaporized into nothing. I repeat...\n
**[06:10] ---**
Will we have only a crescent moon\nto look at for the rest of our lives?\n
**[06:15] ---**
And the second was this:\n
**[06:18] ---**
How do you do?\n
**[06:21] ---**
I'm the one who blasted your moon.\n
**[06:26] ---**
I plan to do the same to the Earth next year.\n
**[06:28] ---**
Now I'm your teacher. Nice to meet you.\n
**[06:33] ---**
There are at *least *six things wrong with this picture!
**[06:35] ---**
The feeling was unanimous.\n
**[06:37] ---**
I'm Karasuma from the Ministry of Defense.\n
**[06:41] ---**
First, please understand that\nwhat I'm about to say is a state secret.\n
**[06:48] ---**
Let me be blunt:\n
**[06:50] ---**
I want you to kill this creature.\n
**[06:55] ---**
Um...\n
**[06:57] ---**
What *is* that? Is that the alien or whatever that came to attack us?
**[07:01] ---**
How rude! I'll have you know\nI was born and raised on Earth!\n
**[07:05] ---**
He was?\n
**[07:06] ---**
I'm afraid I can't discuss the details,\nbut he's telling the truth.\n
**[07:11] ---**
Come March next year,\nthis creature who smashed the moon\n
**[07:16] ---**
will destroy Earth as well.\n
**[07:19] ---**
Only the world's leaders know about this.\n
**[07:23] ---**
If news of this guy gets out there,\nwe'd be looking at a global panic.\n
**[07:28] ---**
You've got to kill him in\nsecret before that happens.\n
**[07:32] ---**
In other words...\n
**[07:33] ---**
...an assassination.\n
**[07:35] ---**
But this guy...\n
**[07:37] ---**
...is extremely fast!\n
**[07:38] ---**
You try to kill him...\n
**[07:40] ---**
...and he ends up grooming your\neyebrows instead--immaculately!\n
**[07:46] ---**
This superbeing has the power\nto turn a full moon into a crescent.\n
**[07:50] ---**
His speed tops out at Mach 20!\n
**[07:53] ---**
In short, if he gets away,\n
**[07:56] ---**
we'll be left helpless,\nawaiting our destruction.\n
**[08:00] ---**
And *that's* no fun.
**[08:03] ---**
So I made your government an offer:\n
**[08:06] ---**
No killing me.\n
**[08:08] ---**
Instead, I'll teach Class 3-E at\nKunugigaoka Junior High School.\n
**[08:13] ---**
What? Why?\n
**[08:14] ---**
We don't know what he's after.\n
**[08:16] ---**
But we were forced to agree,\n
**[08:18] ---**
on the condition that he\ndoesn't harm any of you students.\n
**[08:23] ---**
"Old Campus"\n
**[08:23] ---**
"Old Campus"\nWe have two reasons:\n
**[08:25] ---**
First and foremost,\ncoming to a classroom every day\n
**[08:27] ---**
lets us keep an eye on him,\n
**[08:30] ---**
and second, it gives some thirty people\nthe opportunity to kill him\n
**[08:34] ---**
from extremely close range.\n
**[08:38] ---**
Nakamura...\n
**[08:40] ---**
Didn't I tell you not to let\nassassination interfere with your studies?\n
**[08:43] ---**
Sorry...\n
**[08:45] ---**
As punishment, go stand in the back!\n
**[08:49] ---**
Why did this creature become our teacher?\n
**[08:52] ---**
Why should we have to assassinate him?\n
**[08:54] ---**
These cries faded with\nword of one final condition.\n
**[08:58] ---**
Success will be rewarded with ten billion yen.\n
**[09:02] ---**
It's only right.\n
**[09:04] ---**
A successful assassination\nwill literally save the Earth.\n
**[09:09] ---**
Luckily, he doesn't think much of you.\n
**[09:13] ---**
See? Those green stripes\nmean he's looking down on you!\n
**[09:16] ---**
What the hell kind of skin *is* that?!
**[09:18] ---**
Obviously! If the government\ncan't kill me, how could you?\n
**[09:23] ---**
Even when they sent their\ncutting-edge fighter jets after me...\n
**[09:34] ---**
...I ended up giving them a\ncoat of wax right there in midair!\n
**[09:37] ---**
What's with all the grooming?\n
**[09:39] ---**
You must find a chink in\nhis defenses and strike at it.\n
**[09:44] ---**
You'll have weapons and ammo that won't hurt humans, but *will* work on him.
**[09:48] ---**
You must keep this secret\nfrom your family and friends.\n
**[09:52] ---**
There's no time to lose.\n
**[09:54] ---**
If the Earth should disappear,\nwe'll have nowhere left to run.\n
**[09:57] ---**
And that's about it! Now let's make\nthe most of your one remaining year!\n
**[10:07] ---**
We only have a year.\n
**[10:09] ---**
If we don't manage to assassinate this guy,\n
**[10:13] ---**
Earth will be history.\n
**[10:21] ---**
Ah, lunchtime!\n
**[10:23] ---**
I'll just pop over to China for some *mapo* tofu.
**[10:27] ---**
Any aspiring assassins are\nwelcome to hit me up on my cell.\n
**[10:34] ---**
Let's see... if he's traveling at Mach 20...\n
**[10:38] ---**
...it'll take maybe ten minutes to get to Sichuan, home of *mapo* tofu.
**[10:41] ---**
Guess no missile could shoot *that* down.
**[10:45] ---**
Heck, that octopus even grades tests\nwhile moving faster than sound!\n
**[10:49] ---**
Seriously?!\n
**[10:50] ---**
"English Quiz" "Perfect answer!! Double octopus!"\nMine came back with a drawing on it.\n
**[10:53] ---**
Don't you think he's\npretty good at teaching, though?\n
**[10:56] ---**
Right? He taught me math\nafter class and I did great on my test!\n
**[11:02] ---**
Yeah, but...\n
**[11:04] ---**
...we *are* the E Class.
**[11:07] ---**
Tryin' our best won't do much.\n
**[11:10] ---**
True, he was a super octopoid creature\nand our assassination target,\n
**[11:15] ---**
but...\n
**[11:16] ---**
...for whatever reason,\nhe does a perfectly normal job of teaching.\n
**[11:20] ---**
And though we're impromptu killers,\nwe're perfectly normal students...\n
**[11:26] ---**
but the E Class is a\nlittle different from the rest.\n
**[11:34] ---**
Hey, Nagisa.\n
**[11:36] ---**
Come with us. It's time to put\nour assassination plan into action.\n
**[11:44] ---**
That octopus's face changes\ncolor according to his mood, right?\n
**[11:49] ---**
Did you do those observations I told you to?\n
**[11:52] ---**
More or less. We know it's striped\ngreen when he's feeling confident.\n
**[11:58] ---**
"A: A" "K: kiha" "B: bara"\n
**[11:58] ---**
"A: A" "K: kiha" "B: bara"\nWhen we give a wrong answer, it's dark purple.\n
**[12:02] ---**
"A: Akiyama" "K: Kiyohara" "B: Burkleo"\nA right answer makes it go bright scarlet.\n
**[12:04] ---**
But what's really interesting is after lunch...\n
**[12:07] ---**
I don't need to know all that.\n
**[12:10] ---**
I have a plan... and when he\nlets his guard down the most,\n
**[12:14] ---**
*you* are going to carry it out.
**[12:16] ---**
M-Me? But...\n
**[12:18] ---**
Don't be such a goody-goody. We're the E Class--\n
**[12:22] ---**
the misfits that can't keep up\nat this famous prep school.\n
**[12:28] ---**
They call us... the *End* Class.
**[12:29] ---**
"The End Class" They call us... the *End* Class.
**[12:32] ---**
"Old Campus"\n
**[12:32] ---**
"Old Campus"\nEvery day, they send us to this isolated\n
**[12:36] ---**
mountaintop campus,\ndiscriminating against us like we're scum.\n
**[12:40] ---**
When would us losers ever\nin our lives get another chance\n
**[12:43] ---**
to score a cool ten billion yen?\n
**[12:46] ---**
We're gonna make it--make\nit through this crappy situation...\n
**[12:51] ---**
by any means necessary.\n
**[12:56] ---**
Just don't screw up,\n
**[12:57] ---**
Nagisa.\n
**[12:59] ---**
I heard that Nagisa is headed for E Class.\n
**[13:03] ---**
Ooh. Well, that's it for him.\n
**[13:06] ---**
I'm gonna delete his contact info.\n
**[13:08] ---**
Me, too. Can't have people\nthinking we're on the same level!\n
**[13:20] ---**
I'm back!\n
**[13:22] ---**
H-Hello, sir...\n
**[13:25] ---**
What's with the missile?\n
**[13:27] ---**
A souvenir.\n
**[13:28] ---**
The Self-Defense Force was\nwaiting for me in the Sea of Japan.\n
**[13:31] ---**
I-It must be terrible, being a target.\n
**[13:34] ---**
Not at all. You know you're powerful\nwhen everyone has it in for you.\n
**[13:39] ---**
Now let's begin fifth period.\n
**[13:47] ---**
Yes, sir.\n
**[13:48] ---**
He doesn't understand.\n
**[13:51] ---**
If you're everyone's assassination target,\n
**[13:54] ---**
that means they all acknowledge your power.\n
**[14:00] ---**
A creature like that\nwouldn't understand what it's like\n
**[14:03] ---**
being unworthy of anyone's expectations or fear,\n
**[14:05] ---**
or even their recognition...\n
**[14:11] ---**
Thanks to you, my evaluation is in the gutter!\n
**[14:15] ---**
The only good thing about it is not having to see *you* anymore.
**[14:24] ---**
I might just be able to kill him.\n
**[14:26] ---**
After all... this teacher can't see me, either.\n
**[14:38] ---**
"Old Campus"\n
**[14:40] ---**
"All Along"\n
**[14:41] ---**
"All Along"\nAll right, then,\n
**[14:43] ---**
compose a short poem\nto go along with our theme.\n
**[14:46] ---**
The final line should be\n"was tentacles all along."\n
**[14:50] ---**
Huh?\n
**[14:51] ---**
"Was tentacles all along"?\n
**[14:54] ---**
Indeed!\n
**[14:55] ---**
When you're finished, bring them to me.\n
**[14:57] ---**
I'm looking for proper grammar\n
**[15:00] ---**
and whether you've\nconveyed the tentacle's beauty.\n
**[15:03] ---**
An example:\n
**[15:04] ---**
"Not the storm of garden's snow\n/ of flowers moving on\n
**[15:08] ---**
But sprouting there instead\n/ was tentacles all along."\n
**[15:13] ---**
"It was tentacles"? Really?\n
**[15:15] ---**
Once you're done, you're free to go home!\n
**[15:18] ---**
How are we gonna write about *that*?
**[15:20] ---**
Now, now--aren't any marvelously\nslithery phrases coming to mind?\n
**[15:24] ---**
Slither slither slither slither!\n
**[15:27] ---**
--Enough with the slithering!\n--Slither slither slither slither!\n
**[15:28] ---**
I have a question!\n
**[15:30] ---**
Ah--yes, Kayano?\n
**[15:33] ---**
This is a weird question to\nask now, but... what's your name?\n
**[15:37] ---**
How else can we tell what\nteacher we're talking about?\n
**[15:40] ---**
My... name?\n
**[15:43] ---**
Now that you mention it...\n
**[15:44] ---**
...he never did tell us.\n
**[15:45] ---**
Hmm... I don't really have\nthe kind of name you tell people.\n
**[15:49] ---**
Go ahead and give me one.\n
**[15:51] ---**
You sure about that?\n
**[15:53] ---**
But right now, focus on your schoolwork.\n
**[15:55] ---**
Yes, sir.\n
**[15:57] ---**
Meanwhile, I'll just take a little break.\n
**[16:08] ---**
Finished already, Nagisa?\n
**[16:17] ---**
After lunch, right around\nthe time we get sleepy,\n
**[16:20] ---**
his face sometimes goes light pink.\n
**[16:24] ---**
He was a little slow responding\nto Kayano's question, too.\n
**[16:27] ---**
That might be when he's at his most vulnerable.\n
**[16:34] ---**
Us prep-school failures are always thinking,\n
**[16:38] ---**
"We gotta get back at 'em somehow."\n
**[16:40] ---**
You can do it if you try.\n
**[16:42] ---**
That's what our parents\nand friends and teachers say.\n
**[16:46] ---**
You can do it if you try.\n
**[16:52] ---**
I told you: be more inventive!\n
**[16:55] ---**
We have to prove ourselves...\n
**[16:58] ---**
...by any means necessary.\n
**[17:07] ---**
Yesss!\n
**[17:08] ---**
We did it!\n
**[17:09] ---**
--Ten billion yen! Cha-ching!\n--Nagisa!\n
**[17:12] ---**
Serves you right!\n
**[17:13] ---**
Terasaka!\n
**[17:14] ---**
What have you done?!\n
**[17:15] ---**
Bet he never expected a suicide bomber!\n
**[17:18] ---**
Hey!\n
**[17:19] ---**
What'd you give Nagisa?!\n
**[17:21] ---**
Huh? A toy grenade.\n
**[17:24] ---**
But I beefed it up with gunpowder\n
**[17:27] ---**
so it'd shoot three hundred anti-Sensei bullets\n
**[17:30] ---**
at crazy-high speed!\n
**[17:33] ---**
They're not strong enough to kill anybody.\n
**[17:35] ---**
My ten billion yen'll cover his medical bi--\n
**[17:40] ---**
He's not hurt? Not even a single burn?\n
**[17:43] ---**
And... this membrane...\n
**[17:45] ---**
--is attached to that octopus's corpse?\n--As it happens,\n
**[17:48] ---**
I shed my skin once a month.\n
**[17:51] ---**
I protected Nagisa there\nby covering him with my old skin.\n
**[17:56] ---**
It's my once-monthly ace in the hole.\n
**[18:03] ---**
Terasaka, Yoshida, Muramatsu.\n
**[18:08] ---**
You don't have to look at\nthe color of his face to know.\n
**[18:17] ---**
Pitch black! He is *furious*!
**[18:20] ---**
You three...\n
**[18:22] ---**
...you're behind this, yes?\n
**[18:24] ---**
N-No!\n
**[18:25] ---**
It was all Nagisa's idea!\n
**[18:34] ---**
He's gone!\n
**[18:35] ---**
"Yoshida" "Terasaka" "Muramatsu"\n
**[18:38] ---**
"Yoshida" "Terasaka" "Muramatsu"\n
**[18:39] ---**
The nameplates off our houses?!\n
**[18:41] ---**
My agreement with your\ngovernment says I won't harm you.\n
**[18:46] ---**
But if you try another assassination like that one...\n
**[18:48] ---**
"Shiota"\nBut if you try another assassination like that one...\n
**[18:54] ---**
"Takebayashi" "Hazama" "Shiota" "Sugaya"\n...I might just harm someone else.\n
**[18:57] ---**
...I might just harm someone else.\n
**[18:58] ---**
Your family, your friends...\n
**[19:00] ---**
Or I could wipe out the\nwhole planet apart from you.\n
**[19:06] ---**
Five seconds, and we all knew:\n
**[19:09] ---**
There was no running\nto the ends of the Earth for us.\n
**[19:13] ---**
If we *really* wanted to run...
**[19:17] ---**
...all we could do... was kill him!\n
**[19:21] ---**
What the hell's your deal, anyway?\n
**[19:23] ---**
You're just a giant pain!\n
**[19:25] ---**
Showing up all "I'm gonna\nblow up Earth" and "Assassinate me"!\n
**[19:28] ---**
What's so wrong with using an\nannoying method to kill an annoying guy?!\n
**[19:33] ---**
Annoying? Hardly.\nYour idea itself was a very good one.\n
**[19:38] ---**
Especially you, Nagisa.\n
**[19:40] ---**
The way you carried yourself so naturally\non your approach gets full marks.\n
**[19:43] ---**
You made it right through\nthe chink in my defenses.\n
**[19:46] ---**
However!\n
**[19:48] ---**
None of you looked out for Nagisa,\nnot even Nagisa himself.\n
**[19:54] ---**
Students like that aren't\nfit to assassinate anyone.\n
**[19:58] ---**
We need an assassination worth\nsmiling about--one to be proud of!\n
**[20:01] ---**
You're all capable assassins\nwho have that power within you.\n
**[20:06] ---**
Some advice from your teacher and your target.\n
**[20:11] ---**
Chewed out at Mach 20,\nthen praised with waving tentacles...\n
**[20:16] ---**
This unusual education\n
**[20:18] ---**
made me pretty happy.\n
**[20:21] ---**
All because this unusual teacher\n
**[20:23] ---**
was actually\n
**[20:25] ---**
looking at us head-on.\n
**[20:35] ---**
If you...\n
**[20:38] ---**
If you would give your time,\n
**[20:41] ---**
go teach those children.\n
**[20:45] ---**
What splendid tentacles...\n
**[20:48] ---**
With hands like these...\nI'm sure you'll be a splendid teacher.\n
**[20:56] ---**
Here's a question for you, Nagisa:\n
**[20:58] ---**
I have not the slightest\nintention of being killed.\n
**[21:02] ---**
I will enjoy my time with\nyou all until next March,\n
**[21:04] ---**
and then blow Earth up.\n
**[21:07] ---**
If you don't like it,\nwhat are you going to do about it?\n
**[21:11] ---**
We've never assassinated anyone before,\n
**[21:14] ---**
and there's plenty of\nother stuff we should be doing.\n
**[21:19] ---**
But you know...\n
**[21:21] ---**
I think this teacher\n
**[21:23] ---**
might even accept my bloodlust.\n
**[21:26] ---**
Before you destroy Earth... I'll kill you.\n
**[21:32] ---**
Then do it now!\n
**[21:34] ---**
Once you've killed me, you're free to go home!\n
**[21:37] ---**
Just like that, huh?\n
**[21:38] ---**
You *know* we can't kill you!
**[21:41] ---**
We are killers. And our target\n
**[21:44] ---**
is our teacher.\n
**[21:45] ---**
--Wipe, wipe, wipe it clean!\n--Even if we shot him now...\n
**[21:48] ---**
...we'd just be polished up\nlike those nameplates.\n
**[21:51] ---**
We're never going home!\n
**[21:53] ---**
An unkillable teacher...\n
**[21:55] ---**
"*Korosenai*"... "*koro*"...
**[21:58] ---**
Oh! How about "Koro Sensei"?\n
**[22:01] ---**
Koro Sensei?\n
**[22:04] ---**
It's us and Koro Sensei,\n
**[22:07] ---**
in our assassination classroom.\n
**[22:10] ---**
Another day, another class bell rings.\n
**[22:18] ---**
*I still remember the shooting star *
**[22:24] ---**
*I saw last night--I was waiting for... *
**[22:32] ---**
*Hello, shooting star *
**[22:34] ---**
*Hello, shooting star again *
**[22:37] ---**
*She's been waiting *
**[22:39] ---**
*That dreaming girl has been here *
**[22:43] ---**
*All this time, ah ah *
**[22:49] ---**
*Just like she was that day, ah ah *
**[22:55] ---**
*Shine again *